#being too innocent in my drawing habits.

[lyvhie]

hi omg read the jeno one I requested ATE DOWNNNNNN…… so for nowwwww maybe thinking jeno (sorry I love him…) x shy!reader who doesent really like the idea of jeno seeing her naked cause reader is SCAREDDDD… so he just praises her throughout the whole thing… LOVE UR WORKS they’re so good 💖

-🦋🦋🦋🦋

touch it | ljn

jeno x fem!reader (18+ mdni)

summary: jeno never intended to invest so much time and effort just to have sex with you.

a/n: my sweet 🦋 anon... i'm sorry it took me so long to post this. as soon as i saw it i started writing but it wasn't coming out like i think it should and i didn't want to give you something bad 😞 please forgive me 🙏 i hope you like this one too, it ended up being longer than i was planning. love u, please don't give up on me!

cw: smut, shy/inexperienced!reader, jeno big dick agenda, very slightly bulge kink, fingering, oral (m), unprotected penetrative sex (bcs i forgot to write the condom part sorryyy 🫣), praising, pet names.

jeno never considered himself a patient person. he always got what he wanted when he wanted. and that's why you were driving him crazy.

at first, he enjoyed toying with you, finding it effortless to get under your skin. it was just a game to him, a way to pass the time by teasing and taunting. he loved pushing your buttons with even the slightest action, knowing how easily you would react.

he wasn't entirely sure why you acted the way you did around him. was it shyness or fear of people in general? perhaps a combination of both. regardless, he found your reactions incredibly endearing. whenever he looked at you, he couldn't help but smile at the way you fidgeted and stumbled over your words.

it was cute. he just knew he had to fuck you. he made it his personal goal.

he was aware that winning you over wouldn't be easy, and that he'd have to gain your trust and go through the whole song and dance. but he saw it as a thrilling challenge, and he was determined to make you his.

he surprisingly found it easy to become your friend. given your lonely nature, he didn't need to put in much effort. you didn't appear to have many friends, which made it simple for him to step in and fill that role.

what began as innocent gestures, like whispering sweet nothings in your ear or tenderly tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, quickly escalated into more intimate encounters.

his “accidental” touches or the casual placing of his hand on your thigh, how he enjoyed wrapping his arms around you from behind, his chest pressed against your back as his hands gently roamed your sides. he did all of this to get rise out of you, to see you get all flustered and embarrassed and it worked perfectly.

he knew that simply being a good friend wouldn't be enough to take you to bed with your legs all open for him, so he doubled down on his efforts. he had to be the best friend you ever had.

he became the person you could count on for anything — if something was troubling you, he'd be there to listen and provide comfort. you wanted a plushie from your favorite show? no problem, he would make sure to get it for you. feeling lonely and in need of companionship? all you had to do was call him, and he'd be right there for you.

all of it was part of his grand scheme to lower your defenses and draw you closer to him. and it worked little by little.

when you confessed that you had never kissed anyone before, his response was instant: "that's what friends are for." he gauged your reaction, noticing the way you nibbled on your lip and fidgeted with the hem of your skirt, all little habits that he had noticed in you a long time ago.

his words were merely to test the waters, to see how you would respond to his subtle advances. he was overjoyed when you finally agreed to his suggestion, after taking some time to consider (a good 5 minutes). he couldn't help but feel proud that he was the one who would get to kiss your innocent lips, a thought that thrilled him. this small victory fueled his confidence in the belief that winning you over wouldn't be hard.

it was fun to him, teaching you how to kiss for the first time and seeing your reaction to his touch. the moment he reached out to touch your face, you quickly recoiled, as if you had been burned. it just fueled his desire to go further and explore this nervous, inexperienced side of you.

"relax, baby," he spoke softly, your favorite term of endearment rolling off his tongue effortlessly. he gently took your hand in his, soothingly rubbing his thumbs over your skin in a reassuring manner. it was his way of calming you down, a small gesture that never failed to affect you.

as you tried to follow his words and relax, he cupped your face between his hands and leaned in closer. with a soothing tone, he instructed you to close your eyes. he was so close that you unconsciously held your breath, which made him chuckle. his breath ghosted over your skin as he spoke, his proximity to you causing your heart to flutter in your chest.

as his lips finally touched yours, a soft gasp escaped you and you nearly jolted. he started with just a gentle peck, giving you a chance to adjust to the sensation. your heart pounded wildly in your chest, the rapid rhythm so intense that you feared it might burst out of your chest at any moment. you were almost certain he could hear it, the sound of your heartbeats echoing in your ears and filling the silence between you.

his soft voice gently commanded, "open your mouth slightly, sweetheart," and you obeyed eagerly, parting your lips. a small hum escaped you as you felt the warm, wet touch of his tongue slipping into your mouth. the sudden sensation sent chills down your spine, surprising you in the most pleasurable way.

as you started moving your tongue against his, following the rhythm he set, he was the one who couldn't help but let out a pleased hum. his hand moved from your face to your hair, fingers gently grasping the locks and pulling you closer to him.

the feeling of your mouth against his, your inexperienced but eager tongue trying to keep up with his, was beyond what he imagined. the taste of you, so sweet and untainted, drove him to become more demanding, rougher, and you didn't seem to mind, responding to his intensity with a sense of abandon.

he carefully maneuvered you onto your back on the couch, crawling over you and bringing his body on top of yours. his hands began to explore your form, tracing every contour until they reached your thighs and gently caressed the soft skin. with a sly smile, he squeezed the supple flesh, grateful that you were wearing a skirt, making his plans even simpler.

tou were so absorbed in the way his mouth captured yours that it took awhile for you to notice his hand roaming further up your skirt. the feeling of his fingers slowly tracing your inner thigh sent shivers up your spine, igniting sparks of pleasure that made you almost gasp into his mouth.

you managed to pull away from the kiss, panting for air, and stopped his hand before it went any higher. "w-wait, jeno," you gasped, your voice breathless and filled with hesitation.

jeno's breath was shallow, his mouth moving to your neck as he inhaled your scent and began to place soft, gentle kisses there, making you left a soft sigh. he hummed against your skin, his voice still unsteady as he responded to you. "what is it, baby?" he murmured against your skin, his warm breath teasing your sensitive flesh.

“i-i don't—” your words were interrupted by a gasp as he sucked on your neck, his lips creating a pleasant suction that made your head spin. but as he continued to nibble and kiss your skin, you softly pleaded, "j-jeno, stop.”

jeno grudgingly pulled away from your neck, his eyes a mix of desire and annoyance as he looked at you. but you were too flustered to notice his expression, hastily hiding your face in your hands, unable to meet his gaze. your embarrassment was palpable, and the moment was suspended in a brief silence.

before he could utter another word, you hastily scrambled out from under him, mumbling a clumsy excuse before hastily retreating to your room. he sat there on the couch, a little bewildered, as he watched you disappear. the sound of your door closing echoed in the silence that followed, leaving him alone with his frustrated thoughts.

he ran his hand through his hair. of course he wouldn't get in your panties so quickly. he got a little carried away by the moment and forgot that he needed to take things very slowly with you.

he had assumed you would lock yourself in your room for a while longer, probably consumed by a million thoughts and doubts that he was all too familiar with at this point.

after a while, he stood up from the couch and approached your door, knocking softly on the wood. "i'll be waiting," he called out softly, and that was all he said.

he was already starting to turn away, but the sound of the door opening caught his attention. you emerged from behind the opening, looking at him timidly, and he was taken aback by your whispered request.

"can we... keep practicing? j-just the kissing…" you spoke in a small voice, your words barely audible but filled with trepidation and desire. he froze for a moment, surprised by the unexpected request, before a smirk tugged at the corner of his lips.

“you don't have to ask twice, sweetheart.”

in the days that followed, a new routine was established between you and him. every time you found yourselves together, whether at his place or yours, the hours would pass in a haze of lip and tongue, mouths moving against each other in a frenzy. by the end of each session, your lips would be swollen and sensitive to the touch, a reminder of the time spent indulging in such an activity.

but what truly fueled jeno's frustration was the fact that your interactions always seemed to stop at the same point. no matter how much he touched and caressed you, nothing ever went further than a few brief moments of physical contact.

he felt an intense sense of desperation growing within him, the unfulfilled desire weighing heavily on his mind. he longed to take things further, to explore more of you, but somehow he always found himself stuck in this endless cycle of heated yet ultimately unsatisfying make-out sessions.

he was already mentally bracing himself for the challenges ahead, but then you caught him off guard once more.

sitting on his lap, your tongues intertwined in a hungry dance, you suddenly did something unexpected. you began to subtly grind against his thigh, your movements and moans so natural it was as if you weren't fully aware of what you were doing.

the sensations were immediate, and he felt a twitch in his pants. the feeling of you riding his leg set his body trembling with desire. a low groan escaped him, his kiss growing more fierce as he tried to keep himself together in the face of your unintentional provocation. he could feel his arousal growing with each passing moment, and the thought of having you so close yet so out of reach was driving him insane.

jeno's grip on your waist became a little tighter as he pulled you down, pressing you against him more firmly. the thin fabric of your shorts did little to disguise the wetness building between your thighs, leaving a noticeable dampness on his pants.

your moans grew a little louder as you lost yourself in the sensations, and jeno reluctantly broke the kiss to look at you. he clutched your waist, stopping your movements and holding you firmly in place, drawing a whine from you.

your words escaped your lips involuntarily, a soft plea for more. "jeno, please," you murmured, desperation tinging your voice. he chuckled softly at the sound of your plea, his smirk growing wider. “please what, baby?" he whispered, his lips brushing gently against yours, barely making contact, teasing you with the lightest touch.

his question hung in the air, unanswered, leaving you floundering to articulate your desires. you felt a mixture of shyness and embarrassment, unable to vocalize what you truly wanted. so, your response was a soft whine as you hid your face in the crook of his neck. his chest vibrated with a low chuckle, his amusement evident at your inability to express yourself clearly.

“you want some relief here, sweetie?” his hand slid between your legs, his middle finger pressing against your clothed cunt, making you gasp at the sudden contact.

this time, you made no attempt to stop him, instead nodding silently in agreement. you buried yourself deeper into the safety of his neck, feeling embarrassment and need. you knew deep down that you were desperate for some form of release, and the realization only flustered you.

jeno, on the other hand, was practically bursting with excitement and joy, mentally launching fireworks and wanting to dance a victory lap around the house. he was finally close to getting the hardest fuck of his life — not exactly in the good way.

his voice was a soft whisper in your ear as he nibbled gently on your earlobe, sending shivers down your spine. "we should do something about it, shouldn't we, pretty girl?" he murmured, his nose nuzzling tenderly against your ear. "will you let me help you again?" he asked, his breath warm against your skin.

your response was immediate, a desperate plea for his touch. "yes, please," you managed to stutter out, your voice tinged with a hint of need.

even though he just wanted to empty his balls, he knew he had to make you experience some of the sensations and induce you to want more.

jeno leaned against the bedhead, preparing himself for what was to come. his one hand began to trace gentle circles on your thigh, while the other continued to soothe you with soft caresses on your back. "okay, baby," he assured you. "just relax and let me take care of you, alright?”

jeno had become skillful in taking care of you, and his request for you to relax was met with an immediate submission from you. he wasted no time moving your pajamas shorts out of the way, efficiently tugging the fabric to the side.

due to your current position, where you were on his lap, with your chest pressed against his and your face still buried in his neck, jeno had limited visibility of you. he could feel your body against his, but he couldn't see much more than that. despite being mildly frustrated by the lack of visual access, he knew you wouldn't pull away anytime soon, even if he asked. you seemed too focused on hiding your flustered face against his skin.

even so, he could feel how soaked your panties were and that was enough for him right now. once again, jeno wasted no time in his actions, pulling your panties to the side with decisive motion. his digits pressed gently against your sensitive flesh, eliciting sigh from you. his fingers parted your folds, gently exploring your wetness with delicate movements. he took his time, savoring the moment, your soft sounds and how you were already squirming with just a few touches.

you gasped as he slipped a finger inside you. he started pumping slowly, he could feel how tight you were and he couldn't help but feel his cock stir inside his pants, his mind swirling with thoughts of what it would be like to be inside you.

"how does it feels, baby?" he coos, adding another finger to stretch you just enough, feeling how you clenched around his digits and moaned timidly into his neck. “g-good… very good,” was all you could mutter, your breath hitching as you felt him scissor and curl.

jeno hummed, a contented sound escaping him, as he used his free hand to gently push away the strands of hair that hung over your neck. he pressed his lips against your skin, gently kissing and nibbling at the sensitive flesh, feeling a shiver run through you.

jeno's fingers began to search inside you, seeking out the spot that would make you melt. when you trembled and a loud moan escaped you, his smirk widened. "found it," he chuckled, continuing to target that sweet spot with deliberate precision.

he added pressure with his palm against your clit, rubbing it softly but firmly enough to ignite intense sensations. he knew exactly how sensitive you were, and even this gentle touch was more than enough to leave you moaning and trembling.

jeno nuzzled your ear, his breath warm against your skin as he spoke soft words to you. "you sound so pretty, baby," he murmured, his hand never ceasing its movement as he felt your body clenching around him. "i know you're close already," he continued, increasing the speed of his movements. "just let it go, don't hold it back, okay?" he coaxed.

you didn't even realize how close you were, the sensations stirring in your body completely unexpected. there was a strange feeling in your stomach, your toes curling as you clung to him tighter. then, his words struck you like a command, and suddenly, a wave of pleasure washed over you. the new sensation was overwhelming, almost transporting you to another realm.

jeno absolutely loved the way you mewled his name in the midst of your climax. he relished in the sweet sounds you made, eagerly anticipating the chance to hear more and feel more of you. his desire was palpable as he continued to watch you come undone in his arms.

with your body quivering from the aftermath of your climax, you leaned against him, allowing your weight to fully rest on him. the tingles that coursed through you seemed to reach every inch of your skin, leaving you breathless. you panted slightly as you felt your body slowly returning to a state of stability.

jeno slowly withdrew his fingers, wiping them clean on your shorts. with a gentle tug, he drew your face away from his neck, allowing him to finally get a proper look at you.

your mind was still hazy from the intensity of your climax, and you barely registered his actions until you saw the smug expression on his face. the realization that you looked so utterly wrecked just from a little fingering made jeno silently contemplate how you would look when he pushed you further than just his fingers.

you were on the verge of speaking when he silenced you with a kiss, a kiss that you gladly returned. the touch of his hands slipping under your shirt sent a shiver down your spine, his fingers gently caressing your bare skin. you felt his touch drifting over the clasps of your bra, his movements deliberate and suggestive.

despite being consumed by the myriad of sensations he was evoking in you, you couldn't help but notice the way his hand tugged at the hem of your shirt, clearly signaling his intention to remove it. but as he began to lift the fabric, you instinctively halted his movements by placing your hands over his, preventing him from proceeding further. you pulled away from the kiss, gazing into his eyes a hint of hesitation.

“n-not yet, jeno,” you managed to stutter out, biting your lower lip as you averted your gaze from him. the thought of revealing yourself even partially in front of him sent a wave of fear and nervousness coursing through you. despite the intimate moment you had just shared, the idea of baring your body to him, even further, felt overwhelmingly nerve-wracking.

frustration and disappointment etched itself across jeno's features as he suppressed the urge to curse aloud. instead, he released a soft, frustrated breath, his forehead coming to rest against yours. he had been eagerly anticipating a night of finally fucking you senseless until you can't even remember your name, and your hesitation dampened that hope once again.

your soft-spoken words brought him back from his momentary disappointment. "but i..." you began, your voice tinged with coynes and a hint of determination. "i want to make you feel good too," you confessed, your eyes drifting down to his lap, where you couldn't help but notice the evidence of his arousal. there was curiosity and desire in your tone as you confessed your wish to return the favor. “j-just tell me what to do…”

a spark of something akin to admiration and appreciation flared up in jeno's eyes as he processed your words. out of all the things you had ever said, these words felt like music to his ears. a hopeful glimmer of satisfaction shone through, a realization that the night might not be a complete wash after all.

jeno chuckled affectionately, his voice carrying a hint of genuine appreciation as he spoke. "that's so nice of you, sweetie,” he murmured, gifting you a gentle peck on the lips which prompted a smile to bloom on your face. following his instructions, you carefully repositioned yourself, assuming a kneeling position between his legs, your eyes looking up at him expectantly.

a glimmer of greed flickered through Jeno's eyes as he took in the sight of you looking up at him. his hand cupped your face, his touch soft as he traced his fingers along your cheek. a subtle smile played at his lips as he issued a command, his voice dripping with desire. “you can start by taking off my clothes,” he murmured, his eyes locked on yours, hungry and full of heat.

you followed his directions without hesitation, slowly unbuttoning his pants and gently pulling them down, the sound of the fabric rubbing against his skin filling the room. as the fabric pooled around his ankle, your eyes couldn't help but drift towards his impressive package, your breath catching in your throat at the sight.

you saw a darker spot on the fabric of his boxes, damp with pre-cum, you wasted no time in removing the remaining piece, freeing his aching cock that stood proudly in front of your eyes, eliciting a soft sigh of relief from him.

you continued to stare at his dick, blinking a few times as you processed the sight. he was big. too big.

jeno chuckled heartily at the sight of your eyes widening in surprised awe, his ego swelling with a touch of cocky confidence. he knew exactly what was running through your mind. "don't be shy, pretty girl," he teased, a sly smile playing on his lips. "you can touch it." he leaned back, resting his weight on his hands as he waited for you to make a move.

as calm and collected as he appeared to be, jeno was practically craving your touch. his muscles tensed under your gaze, and there was a hint of desperation in his eyes as he longed for your caress. however, he was determined to maintain a facade of coolness, masking his inner pleading with subtle smirks and sultry words.

as your delicate hands finally encircled him, a soft sigh escaped jeno's lips, his eyes closing for a moment as he savored the sensation. jis breath hitched, his teeth gently sinking into his lower lip in response to the pleasure coursung through him. his dark gaze was fixed on you, watching intently as you explored him with a look of curiosity and wonder in your eyes.

you started to stroke his cock slowly, the pre-cum acting enough as a lubricant, facilitating your movements. “just like that, sweetheart,” he said in low groans, his breath heavy.

yes, this. more. fast. please. he closed his eyes tight to savor the sensation. each sweet, slow movement of your hand pushed him closer to relief. and then... a new sensation joined the others. a delicate, refreshing affection, at the tip of his cock. almost like a breeze. you were licking it. rolling that pink, shy and naughty tongue around the head of his erection. kissing and tasting lightly. the feeling was intense. sublime. insufficient.

it took him by surprise how you effortlessly seemed to know what to do, and he found himself thoroughly enjoying it. his hands threaded through your hair, his fingers delving into the soft strands as he lavished his touch upon your head. in that moment, he found himself unable to hold back his words. his voice came out in a rough whisper, "put it all in your mouth.”

for a brief moment, a flicker of worry crossed jeno’s expression. he feared that his request might have intimidated you, that you may stand up from your position on the ground and refuse to continue. he was on the verge of pleading with you, nearly uttering a desperate “please,” but before he could voice his concern, you unexpectedly acquiesced to his command, enveloping the head of his cock in your wet, ecstatic heat.

you began hesitantly. which was understandable, since this was your first time. but you didn't need much skill. he throbbed with desire while you showed great enthusiasm, even though you had no experience. there was little you could have done — except bite him, perhaps — that wouldn't have been delicious.

you were more than good. it was fantastic. he found himself rocking his pelvis, trying to go deeper each time your sweet, juicy mouth descended on him.

a ragged moan escaped his lips as he spoke, his grip on your hair growing tighter as he moved his hips in a quicker, more insistent rhythm. “you are doing so well, baby. so, so, well,” his words came out in a deep, raspy tone.

the mounting tension between you had taken its toll on jeno, and he was acutely aware of the pleasure that had been denied to him for a considerable amount of time. it was a struggle to maintain control, and he found himself teetering on the edge of climax.

as you continued your ministrations, he swallowed hard, the air around him seemingly growing thinner. his body trembled under your touch, his breath escaping in ragged gasps as he felt his climax building up, on the verge of tipping into pure ecstasy.

and, before he could even warn you, he came in your mouth, holding your head in place, forcing you to take his entire load. he didn’t mean to do that, but it felt so good he didn’t want you to pull away at the best part.

as you pulled away, gasping for breath, jeno's grip on your hair loosened, his hands gently releasing their hold on you. his own chest heaved with effort, his breathing ragged and labored from the intense encounter. he gazed at you with eyes heavy with desire, drinking in the sight of your disheveled appearance and the thin line of his cum that traced the corner of your mouth. in that moment, his expression was one of pure contentment and satisfaction.

a ghost of a smirk played at the corners of jeno's lips, his voice lacking any trace of remorse. "i'm sorry, i should have warned you, baby," he said, his words carrying a hint of satisfaction rather than regret.

you glanced up at him, offering a timid smile as you assured him, "i-it's okay, it wasn't that bad,” he watched as you ran your tongue over your lips, innocently cleaning the remnants of his essence.

god, he thought, you're so sexy.

from that point forward, not only had making out become a regular occurrence, but oral sex had become something you enthusiastically welcomed. jeno couldn't help but notice the change in you, how earnestly you seemed to embrace the act of pleasing him. it looked like you derived a sense of satisfaction from bringing him to such levels of ecstasy.

even though jeno was completely happy with the addition of a new activity to the menu, it still wasn't enough. don’t get him wrong, he loved getting a blowjob whenever either of you were in the mood, but what he really needed was to actual fuck you.

he found himself perplexed by your reluctance to take the next step. while he was fully aware of your penchant for shyness, he couldn't help but wonder why you hadn't given in yet.

considering the things you had already engaged in, he assumed that your comfort level would have already reached a point where you would be receptive to more.

the mounting impatience and desire finally got the better of him, and he decided that it was time to address the issue directly. he took a deep breath and gathered his thoughts before addressing you with a blunt question.

“baby, why don't you just let me fuck you?”

jeno caught you off guard, interrupting your casual routine as you were making your way to bed and using a towel to dry your hair. you momentarily froze, the towel suspended in mid-air as you turned to face him with widened eyes. “w-what? jeno…!” you stuttered as you hastily grabbed the towel, clutching it against your face in an attempt to conceal your flustered expression.

he couldn't help but roll his eyes, at your reaction, with a smirk on his lips and a chuckle in his voice, he reached out and pulled you closer to him, his arms encircling your waist and drawing you into his embrace. he settled his chin on your belly, gazing up at you with a curious expression and added with nonchalant tone, "i’m just curious, you know.”

with a single movement, jeno reached up and took the towel from your hands, tugging it away from your face to reveal your expression. his eyes scanned your face, taking in the adorable sight of you all bashful and shy.

"i-i..." your voice trailed off, your nervousness clearly evident. jeno's eyes remain fixed on you, waiting patiently for you to continue. sensing your hesitance, he encouraged you gently, his voice soft and soothing. "mmm, i'm listening," he urged, silently coaxing you to continue.

you averted his gaze, your voice barely above a whisper as you finally confessed. "i-it's just...you'll see me naked and all...," you admitted, the thought alone making your heart race with anxiety.

jeno's eyes widened momentarily as he processed your words, his expression alternating between disbelief and shock.

that was the reason? no fucking way.

"are you serious?" he asked, his voice filled with a touch of incredulity. you responded with an eager nod, still not looking at him, "i-i can't do that, you'll see everything!" your voice trembled slightly, the thought of being fully exposed in front of him clearly terrifying to you.

jeno couldn't believe what he was hearing. it seemed almost unbelievable that the reason you were hesitant to take the next step was solely because of the thought of being completely naked in front of him.

his facial expression softened as he tried to understand your perspective better. "baby, it's me, you know," he said, his voice gentle and reassuring. he reached out to cup your face, his touch tender. "you don't have to be embarrassed with me," he continued, his eyes searching yours.

"i...i know that," you stammered, feeling your heart fluttering in your chest at his touch and the soothing sound of his voice. despite knowing that he was someone you trusted deeply, the thought of being completely nude in front of him still felt overwhelming.

you tried to articulate your feelings, your words coming out in a shaky whisper. "but... it's just... i'm worried i won't look good enough for you," you confessed coyly.

great. you were insecure. he forgot that.

“that's just so stupid," he muttered, pulling you onto the bed with him and positioning you straddling his lap. his fingers gently cradled your chin, tilting your face up to meet his gaze. "you know i love every single part of you, right?" he repeated, his tone tender and sincere. "even those i'm yet dying to see," he added with a smirk, his eyes roaming over your body, taking in every contour. "you are just perfect.”

your eyes widened slightly at his words, his unwavering confidence in your beauty causing a flutter in your chest. insecurity still lingered, but the way he spoke with such certainty made your doubts waver.

your hands unconsciously found their way to his chest, fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt as your breath hitched. "you...you really think that?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper as your lips form a small pout.

jeno chuckled softly, his hands moving from your face to your hips, their grip firm but gentle as they held you in place on his lap. "i don't just think it, i know it," he replied, his eyes scanning your face as his thumbs began to trace soothing circles on your hipbones.

his voice dropped lower as his eyes held your gaze, “your body is incredible," he repeated, "i love every inch of it." his expression softened, and he leaned in closer, his breath warm against your skin. "and i would love even more if you just let me see more of you. you have nothing to be shy about, baby. let me show you just how much i appreciate every part of you.”

your heart skipped a beat, his words igniting a flutter of anticipation within you. despite your lingering insecurities, you couldn't deny the way his words made your stomach churn with excitement and nervousness, he sounded so inviting.

after a few moments of contemplation, your voice trembled as you finally gave in, your eyes meeting his.

"o-okay," you whispered, the word barely audible, as if spoken more to yourself than to him. taking a deep breath, you made the decision, your heart racing in your chest. “i-it's fine.”

as soon as the words left your mouth, granting him permission, Jeno's lips were on yours in a heartbeat, the kiss passionate and feverish. his hands didn't waste any time either, slipping under the fabric of your shirt to caress the soft skin of your back.

“that's it, sweetie,” he said against your lips. “i promise it will be worth it,” he pulled you closer, the intensity of his embrace and the hungry way his tongue sought yours sending waves of pleasure coursing through you.

jeno's impatient hands were soon tugging at the hem of your shirt, his movements eager and insistent as he lifted it over your head, revealing your bare upper body, clad only in a bra. his breath caught in his throat as he took in the sight of your exposed skin, his eyes roaming over you, appreciating every inch. his hands continued to caress your skin, the feeling of flesh on flesh sending shivers down your spine.

his touch was gentle and deliberate, his fingers tracing soft lines along your collarbones, your arms, down your sides. he leaned forward, his lips pressing kisses along your neck and collarbones, nipping and nibbling at the sensitive skin there. "you are so beautiful, baby," he murmured against your skin. "i've been wanting to do this for so long.”

he continued to kiss and nibble at your neck and collarbones, his movements soft but insistent. as he trailed a path of kisses down your chest, his fingers traced the lace of your bra, tracing the edge of the fabric with the tip of his fingers.

his lips moved lower, his kisses growing more frantic as they reached your chest, his tongue tracing the contour of your cleavage as his hands continued to roam your body. his fingers trailed a path down your back to the clasp of your bra, his knuckles brushing against your skin as he fumbled to undo it.

jeno's fingers worked quickly to undo the clasp of your bra, his touch both impatient and skillful as he finally managed to free you from the confines of the undergarment. he pulled it away, revealing your bare chest to him, your tits jiggling slightly.

“fuck,” he exhaled a shaky breath, his eyes taking in the sight of your exposed flesh. "you're more beautiful than i ever imagined," he murmured, his voice filled with desire and awe.

as jeno continued to gaze at you, you couldn't help but feel a wave of shyness wash over you. your arms instinctively moved to cover your chest, attempting to shield yourself from his unabashed staring. embarrassed, you muttered, "s-stop looking at me like that.”

he reached out and gently pulled your arms away from your chest, exposing your bare skin again. “don’t be embarrassed,” he said, his voice soft and soothing. “you’re gorgeous. i could look at you all day.”

He leaned down, his hands trailing a path across your chest, his fingertips gently caressing your boobs. his touch was feather-light, almost reverent as he explored the contour of your flesh. he took his time, seemingly wanting to savor every moment of this encounter.

slowly, he lowered his head, his hand reaching out to cup one, his thumb brushed over your nipple, his fingers closing around your breast, squeezing gently as he drew your nipple into his mouth, sucking softly. he hummed contentedly, lost in the sensation, his lips working slowly, savoringly.

a soft gasp escaped your lips as jeno's tongue worked its magic, sending shivers down your spine. your body writhed beneath him, your fingers tangling in his locks, tugging at them softly.

feeling your body respond to his touch, he took the opportunity to lay you down on your back, gently coaxing you into the plush pillows. he never stopped his ministrations, he caught your nipple between his teeth, giving it a light bite and then sucking, his hands roaming over your body with a possessive touch, as if marking you as his own.

“god, you're so perfect," he whispered, he moved to your other tit, giving it the same attention. "don't hide yourself from me again.”

jeno's hands slid to the waistband of your shorts, his touch burning against your skin. he pulled them down, along with your panties, as you lifted your hips up to help him guide them down your thighs and off your body.

when you were finally bare before him, he couldn't help but take a moment from sucking your boobs to admire the sight of you laid out beneath him, open and vulnerable.

“look at how hot my pretty girl is,” he bite his lower lip, leaning closer to capture your lips in a rough kiss, his fingers making their way to between your thighs. he knew he needed to prepare you for the main event, to make sure you were ready for what he was dying to give you.

you were so sensitive that it was easy to get reactions from you, he didn't even need to finger you that much to make you come a few times, that, along a few praises on your ear while hitting your sweet spots, were enough to have you squirming under him.

jeno's breath was warm against your ear as he spoke, his words sending delightful shivers down your spine. "okay, sweetie," he whispered, his lips still pressed against the sensitive skin of your neck. "you're doing so well."

he could feel your quick breath and the sweat beginning to form on your forehead. his wrists were growing tired from his efforts, but he wasn't backing down. "i'll make you feel even better," he promised, his voice low and seductive.

he shifted his body, his hands working quickly to remove his clothes, discarding them carelessly on the floor beside the bed.

your eyes drank in the sight of jeno's body, taking in his toned muscles and the way his body glowed in the faint light of the room. your gaze fell on his cock standing proud and ready, and a wave of heat washed over you, making you instinctively press your legs together. he was so hot. it was unfair how good he looked.

“like what you see, pretty?” he asked with a smug smile. you weren't brave enough to say the words out loud, but you wanted him to know that you appreciated him too, so you only nodded fiercely, making him laugh and lean over you to press his lips against yours in a gentle kiss while positioning himself between your legs, his erection rubbing against your thigh.

jeno broke the kiss to look into your eyes, his gaze intense and serious. he gently cradled your chin in his hand as he spoke, his voice filled with concern and desire. "just listen to me for a moment, okay?" he said softly. "i need you to promise me that if it becomes too much, if it hurts in any way, you'll tell me to stop. can you do that for me, baby?”

his words hung in the air for a moment, the implications clear. you knew why he was saying that. the size of his cock was undoubtedly intimidating, and it was natural to feel a pang of fear. but your desire for him overpowered any reservations you might have had.

with a nod, you responded. "yes, jeno, i can," you gave him a small smile, "i’ll tell you if it's too much.” he studied your face for a moment, making sure you were sincere and not just saying it to please him. he could see the want in your eyes. the way you nodded your head and answered him firmly gave him the reassurance he needed.

“that’s my good girl,” he kissed your cheek, straightening his back and wrapping his hand around his cock, stroking it a few times before pressing it against your entrance, teasing you lightly by rubbing the tip up and down.

then, he slowly pushed his lenght inside you, as he advanced, you gasped and clutched the sheets, small whimpers of pain escaping your lips. you were lucky you were wet enough to ease the pain, his dick slid into you with ease, he really prepared you well.

jeno's expression mirrored pleasure, his eyes closing in ecstasy as he threw his head back and let out a silent moan. it was as if he had been waiting for this moment for an eternity, and the feeling of you enveloping him was like entering a state of nirvana.

he paused for a moment, his body trembling with pleasure and exertion, as he looked at you. he was breathing heavily, his chest rising and falling as he tried to regain control of his breathing.

"are you doing okay, baby?" he asked, his voice hoarse and low, he wasn't even half way and you seemed to be struggling already.

he looked at your face, taking in the expression of pain and pleasure mingled on your features as your eyebrows furrowed and your eyes welled up with tears. despite the discomfort you were feeling, you reassured him. “y-yes, keep going," you managed to say through trembling lips, your voice shaky but determined. "i can take it, i promise.”

jeno couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt for finding you so incredibly hot even in that moment. he leaned in closer, pressing his face against your neck, and sought out your hands, intertwining his fingers with yours. it was an attempt to provide some distraction from the pain, and his words were a soothing whisper against your skin.

"that's it, sweetheart," he murmured, his voice low and comforting. "you're doing so well. just a little more,” he continued to move his hips, causing you to gasp once more, and he couldn't help but moan at the feeling of you squeezing him. his grip on your hands tightened as he fought to maintain control of his own desire to simply fuck you hard.

and when he was finally fully inside you, a wave of relief washed over you, releasing a soft sigh from your lips, you never felt so full before.

he soon let go of your hand to straighten his back again, you were speared open by his cock and when he pressed the palm of his hand on your belly and you felt the bulge he made there, it was too much. neither of you were expecting you to cum right now, your voice crying out his name as your entire body tremble.

“fuck, baby, already?” he asked under his breath, a smile on his lips. again, that was so hot of you. he can't believe he made you come like that.

and that was enough for him. he pulled his hips back slowly, his cock almost all the way out, a brief moment of relief when your insides were empty again, which didn't take long when he pushed back into you hardly, his tip hitting your cervix, making you both moan loudly. you didn't even had time to recover from the most intense orgasm of your whole life.

“fuck,” he said almost breathless. “feel that, pretty girl?” his grip on your hips tightened enough to feel painful and leave bruises. “feel how deep i am?”

the room was filled with sounds of skin against skin as he increased his pace, thrusting even harder while voicing out a few praises to you, saying how well you take him, how good your pussy feel, how he wanted to fill you up with his cum.

he nipped and nibbled at the sensitive flesh, leaving behind a trail of kisses and light love bites as he continued to move in and out of you. your name spilled from his lips like a prayer, a plea, a mantra.

you had intended to speak, to ask him to slow down, but before you could utter a word, jeno sealed your lips with his own, effectively silencing your pleas. his kiss consumed you, capturing all your moans and protests.

he picked up the pace, his movements growing more urgent, more desperate as he feel himself getting closer to his climax. jeno's voice was a low, seductive whisper, his breath hot against your neck. "gonna fill you up, pretty," he murmured, his teeth sinking into your flesh. "you're gonna take every single drop," he whispered fiercely, nibbling at your neck once more as he continued to move, his thrusts growing more insistent.

his hand went to your clit, wanting to make you cum once again, this time right with him. he was close to his limit and he knew he was overstimulating you, then it wouldn't be so difficult. within moments, jeno felt his body become tense and his thrusts more erratic, his movements stuttering even more as he felt you tighten around him.

it didn't take long for you both to cum and you feet him fill you with his hot seed, both moaning loudly. jeno gave a few more thrusts to make sure you were going to take everything he had to give you before pulling out of you.

jeno's body collapsed onto yours, both of you panting and struggling to catch your breath in the aftermath of your climax. the room was filled exclusively with the sounds of your labored breathing.

you could feel the hotness of his skin against yours, his heartbeat racing against your chest as he tried to regain some control over his own breathing. his weight pressed you into the mattress, his body limp and sated.

he buried his face against your shoulder, his breath warm against your neck. his grip on you loosened, his arms coming to rest by your sides as he lay on top of you, completely spent.

after a few moments of comfortable silence, jeno rolled off you and settled onto his back beside you. he broke the silence, his voice gentle, "how are you feeling, baby?" he asked, turning his head to look at you. he noticed the tired yet content smile on your face.

“blissful,” you answered with a light giggle, making him smile back at you.

good. he was going to focus on that now instead of thinking about how stupid he was for cumming inside you on the first fuck and how this could be a big problem in the future.

[macfrog]

If you ever feel up to it - a little short story from the scom universe about reader and Joel deciding to have a second baby or finding out they're pregnant for the second time would warm my cold dead heart <3

i am. so. sorry. for the word count on this i truly do not know what happened. but i had a lot of fun with it, so. hopefully y'all do, too. happy fathers day! x

jellybean ~4k words | series masterlist warnings: pregnancy symptoms (feeling and being sick, horniness + sleepiness. aka me even when not pregnant), 99% just duckie vs her mom

Duckie spills the secret on a Friday.

The morning is lazy, slow. The breathing of the sea across a plain of beach. Your fingers sift through her hair like the breeze through sun-bleached pages. The way she and the sun tint the room peach.

Sarah sprawls out across the spot still warm on her dad’s side of the bed. She’s in a habit of waking up early to sneak through to your room, lift the bottom of the covers, and army crawl between your bodies.

Joel’s in a habit of stirring to the heat of her at his back, her tiny toes at his spine, and turning to scoop her in one arm. They sleep curled into one another, mouths catching flies.

This morning, though, she’s up to something. She brought a secret.

She’s flat-out on her stomach, pens scratching at the paper. There’s the scent of cherry and lemon and green apple tangling in the air. Taut frown on her face, tongue poked with concentration. She looks just like her dad.

She pauses and looks up at you. “What color is this part?” she asks, dabbing at the blank hubcap.

“Silver,” you reply, fixing the cap back onto the grape pen before it stains your sheets.

She huffs. “I don’t have silver, Mama.”

You tap on the page. “Daddy’s wing mirrors are black, but you did ‘em green. The colors don’t matter, do they?”

But it’s seven a.m., and you’re sharing only the red jellybeans for something of a pre-breakfast snack (the four-year-old’s idea), and you’re exhausted despite having slept the full night, and she keeps halting any time Joel’s humming quietens – just in case he spoils his birthday surprise.

She hunkers down with the lemon pen to nail the emblem of his truck, and you figure – color is just the least of it. Truthfully, to your kid – and so, to you, too – nothing has ever mattered more.

You cup her cheek and lift her gaze back to meet yours. “How about I grab you a glitter pen today, just for the wheels?”

She grins. Little milk teeth, gappy and gummy. Peach fuzz cheeks, sweet as the rest of her, a perfect fit in the palm of your hand.

I love you I love you you’re my whole world I love you, you want to say.

Instead: “Only if we tidy your room later. Deal?”

“Deal, Mama,” Sarah giggles, and her little ink-stained hands splay out across the page again.

She scribbles only a few more splotches of color before you both notice it.

The sudden silence.

The water’s stopped running. The shower screen rattles as he pulls it back. Dripdripdrip from the showerhead straight down to the empty basin.

Sarah twists to watch Joel’s disembodied arm blindly grab for a towel folded on the sink. It whips off out of sight, and he calls through from the bathroom.

“Duckie? You still there?”

“Gogogo,” you whisper, helping your daughter cover her dad’s drawing with blank sheets. “Leave the jellybeans, Duck, save yourself!”

She finds the entire thing hysterical. Swinging her masterpiece under one arm, two fistfuls of rainbow pens, springing from the mattress like it suddenly caught flame. She throws herself from the foot of the bed and dashes across the hall to her own room, candy scattering in her wake.

Joel’s head cranes around the doorframe. “Where’d she go?”

You smile, shrugging. Chewing innocently on a jellybean. “That’s funny. She was here a second ago.”

He pads over to the bed, towel slung loose around his hips. Smirks, when your hungry eyes descend his figure – the bearlike shape of him, all muscle and fur, toned where he needs it but soft where you want it.

He cages over you, dark hair dripping with the smell of citrus, skin sticky.

His lips are like velvet against yours. Tongue still singed with coffee. A low growl from his throat when you lean forward to lick into his mouth.

“Smell so goddamn good,” you murmur, dipping your head to bury into the crook of his neck.

His beard is fuzzier when it’s damp, natural masculine musk melded with the fresh soap and rich aftershave he uses. All honey and oatmeal, mixed with a woodsy scent – and fuck, it’s intoxicating. Moreso than usual – stronger and sexier.

You take his hands and lower them to your hips, letting his fingers knot around the baggy material of your – his T-shirt. Tugging on it, exposing the slip of delicate lace on your hips.

“Darlin’,” Joel warns, “we’re late. We still gotta drop Duckie off – If she walks in –”

You groan, huffing back into the mattress. The weight between your legs ripples over the horizon, pulses into weak nothing.

Joel fixes the shirt back down to your thighs just as the thunder of his daughter’s footsteps rumbles back into the room.

Tonight, he breathes, slicking some of the hair from his face.

You grin, taking his hand to pull yourself back up.

Sarah materializes in the doorway, a lingering half-girl. Smiling from behind the frame, twisting the ball of her foot into the floor.

“Hi, Duck,” Joel says, still playing with your fingers.

“Hi.”

“You look guilty.”

Her grin widens. She totters into the room, launches herself onto the bed, and nuzzles into your side. She squirms when Joel digs his fingers into her waist.

The beats of her laughter drum against your ribs, the same way her fists used to when she lived inside you.

“Alright.” You cradle her, her little head tipping back to wake the rest of Austin up with her squeals of glee. “Are we ready for some actual food, now?”

Joel chuckles, reaching for his mug.

Sarah nods from your lap. Her eyes drift down to the print on your tee. “Mama?”

“Mhm?”

“Do they like jellybeans?”

You frown. “Does who like jellybeans?”

Her finger prods lightly into your tummy. “The baby.”

Joel chokes, splattering coffee into his fist. He slams the mug down, pounds his chest clear of liquid.

“There’s no – Jesus, Joel,” you swipe mocha flecks from the sheets, “Told Sarah to be careful with her pens and then you spray coffee all over the…”

Sarah rolls off, cackling. “Silly Daddy,” she hoots, leaping on the bedroom floor.

“Hey,” you usher her over to the door, “Why don’t you go pick out what you wanna wear today? I’ll be right behind you. Quit tryna give your dad a heart attack, okay?”

“The baby, Mama,” she’s repeating, walking like a little convict. She turns over the threshold to her room like it’s a cell, her pink pajama uniform and guilty expression to go with it. Still laughing, swallowing the ticklish bursts when she notices you’re shaking your head.

“There is no baby.” You kneel before her, repeating, “No baby. Just you. How about your T-shirt with the butterflies?”

It seems to distract her enough. Thank Christ. She gasps, inspired, and twirls off to find the tee.

“Fucking hell,” you sigh, pushing back to your feet.

Joel’s flapping the sheets when you slip back into your room, still clearing his throat. Half-dressed: a white T-shirt over his broad chest and a pair of black boxers. Soaked hair clinging to the back of his neck and drying in flicks across his forehead.

Jesus, you want to pull him back over you and let him have his way.

You close the door over and spin, hands on your hips. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Me?” he croaks. “Did you hear what she just said?”

“You’ve known this kid for four years, Joel, you really can’t tell when she’s fucking with you? She’s my kid, keep up.”

“Just seemed an awfully –” he thumps his chest again, “– awfully specific thing to say.”

“She’s in a phase I think,” you reply, catching the pillow he tosses across. “She’s telling stories. Last week, her pre-K teacher congratulated me our supposed wedding. Asked to see pictures of the Mickey Mouse officiant.”

“Jesus,” he grumbles. “She really bought that?”

You mimic the breezy voice: “Sarah was very convincing.”

Joel scoffs. “I don’t know if I can take a lying phase and a copying phase at the same time. Every goddamn word I say, she’s gotta repeat it.”

“She idolizes you,” you straighten the sheets, “I think it’s endearing.”

“Hm. Just wait until it’s you.”

He wanders around the bed, pulls your back against his chest. His arms cross over your tummy, lips pressing into your shoulder where his shirt has slipped.

“How much harder would two be?” he mumbles into the bare skin.

“Two Sarahs?” You scoff.

Joel laughs. “Yeah, you’re right. I forget she runs on chaos and jellybeans.”

“Yup,” you turn in his arms, linking yours behind his neck, “And there ain’t no point in talking about it anyways, because I am not fucking pregnant.”

He rolls his forehead against yours, stealing bristly kisses. “Okay.”

“I’m not, Joel.”

“I believe you, baby.”

Sarah’s bedtime is a liberal eight, eight thirty on weekends. She likes to sit up, lodged between you and Joel on the couch, and help pick the movie you two will watch once she’s in bed.

Once – and only once – Joel tried to fool her by pretending to play her choice, then switching as soon as she went down.

The kid quizzed him on the movie the next morning. He failed. She’s never forgotten.

Tonight, though, Joel’s out. Some game that you know and care too little about sports to learn the name or importance of. He’s with some buddies at the local bar, probably nursing his second beer in as many hours, and counting down the minutes until he can come home to his girls.

Sarah snores soundly, slumped at your side as though butter wouldn’t melt. The flicker from the TV across her face, the gentle mumbling of the voices onscreen. Her hands limp in her lap, fingers idling in a pink snack bowl.

You admire her, stealing a piece of her popcorn. Teeth grinding down when you remember dishing it for her earlier, hearing her curious voice ask whether or not the baby likes popcorn more than jellybeans.

Nope, you sang, tossing a handful in your mouth as you passed her the bowl. Imaginary babies don’t eat popcorn.

She snorted (which unnerved you, because what the fuck is this kid finding so funny?), and followed you to the living room so close that you could feel her toes at your heels.

Some of the kids in her class have siblings. Some older, but mostly younger. It’s the only fucking explanation, the only thing that explains this sudden interest in the real estate of your uterus.

She’s going through a phase, you tell yourself, suckling on popcorn. But then – how many fucking phases do kids go through? Which phases did you go through?

Barney & Friends. That was a fucking phase. Refusing to leave the house without the hoodie your mom bought you from the Museum of Natural History, even in the height of summer. Ketchup and broccoli, your boyfriend at seventeen, frisbeeing your neighbor’s newspaper and aiming for his flowerpots.

Phase, phase, fucking phase.

Does she know something you don’t?

…No. You took a test just last week. Shut up. Stop letting the kid into your fucking head.

Joel’s keys jangle on the other side of the door, shunting into the lock with a sound which stills your brain.

You tilt your head over the back of the couch, your man’s beard tickling your nose as he kisses you. “Evening.”

“Missed you,” he whispers against your lips. He straightens and tugs the jacket from his shoulders. “She not in bed yet?”

“She fell asleep down here,” you reply. “I got too tired to carry her up.”

He caresses your forehead, big pillowy palm. “You feelin’ okay?”

“It’s been a long day,” you grumble.

Joel smiles. He flops down onto the couch beside you, reaching over to stroke Sarah’s head.

You roll, solid as a rock, curling into his side. “She keeps saying it, Joel. She keeps fucking saying it.”

His chest jumps, tectonic plates moving with a laugh. “You’ve met your match, honey. Produced a professional little shit.”

“One of the other moms from her class is pregnant,” you mumble. “That’s gotta be it, right? That’s where she’s getting it from?”

“Maybe,” Joel muses. His fingers link with yours. “Why don’t you take a test anyways? Settle it in your mind?”

It startles you awake, even if only enough to prove the fucking point.

“No, Joel!” you hiss, body jerking. “If I take a test, and it turns out negative – which it will – she wins! My four-year-old fooled me. No,” you pluck spilled popcorn from your lap, pinging it back into the bowl, “I know this kid. I gave birth to this kid. She is not fucking winning.”

“Alright, baby,” he coos, “it’s okay. I won’t let the four-year-old fool you.”

You glower. “Thanks, asshole.”

He chuckles. “She’d make the best big sister, though. She would,” he insists, when you huff back against his chest. “She’d love being the oldest. Get to be bossy, get to call the shots. Get to protect them, no matter what.”

Your voice feels so small, as inquisitive as your daughter’s when you blink up at him. “Were you protective over Tommy?”

“Oh, yeah. I mean, he was annoying as all hell – and I told him so – but anyone else had anythin’ to say about him, and – well, they had me to deal with.”

“Big scary Joel Miller,” you whisper, yawning into his shirt. “I knew him once.”

“Mhm,” he rumbles, “You sure did.”

You look up again, blinking all doe-eyed and dreamy. Already half-asleep.

“He never scared me,” you whisper.

Joel smiles.

“Well, you scared the hell outta him.”

Saturday morning, you wake to an empty bed. No snoring man, no scribbling girl. Just you – a starfish on the mattress. Bathing in waves of late-morning sun, sheets for coral, body as heavy as though you really are at the bottom of the ocean.

Her giggles carry all the way upstairs. Sarah. They surf into the room on a sunbeam, sounds like bubbles which shatter and sprinkle over your aching body.

You smile into Joel’s pillow, breathing in the smell of him, and peel your eyes open.

It’s ten thirty. Definitely – you blink three times and rub at your eyes, just to make sure. Ten thirty, and something’s swirling behind your navel. Something that sharpens, sours, when you push yourself upright.

“Oh, shit,” you rasp, and throw yourself across the room.

You barely make it, collapsing in a heap at the toilet. Your stomach empties in seconds; three heavy, painful gags and your head is in the bowl, choking on last night’s dinner.

“Motherfucker,” you spit, gasping, “Oh, Jesus.”

You’re sick. You’re just sick. Sarah probably caught something from pre-K, passed it on without even knowing. And, hey – you feel better, now that that happened.

You’re just sick. Nothing else.

“Mornin’,” Joel calls, watching as you stagger into the kitchen.

Sarah mimics his drawl. “Mornin’, Mama.”

“Hi, Duckie.” You crumple into the chair beside her, shoulders hunched. The smell of burnt toast and grape juice twists up your nose, and you suck in a slow breath.

Joel sweeps a hand over your forehead. He tips your jaw up to face him. “You alright? Thought we heard running.”

Sarah rips a slice of toast in two. She stares at the fluffy insides, the jam dripping from the tear. The sight of it lifts the hairs on your skin, the gloopy mess splattering onto her plate.

“Just feel kinda…funny,” you slur, turning away.

“Funny? Funny how?”

“Funny how?” your daughter parrots.

You shrug. Every word, every inhale makes you feel even more nauseous. “Probably just ate something.”

“Heard that one before,” Joel drones, and you throw him a flat look.

Sarah licks the jam from her fingers. She holds her tiny hands up to her dad, snorts when he pretends to bite at them.

“Eat your breakfast, Duckie,” he says then – in his Dad voice. And in something softer, kinder: “Can I make you somethin’?”

You swat the idea away, but it’s already churning in your stomach again. “Just gotta – get over whatever it – is.”

The table falls silent. Joel and Sarah stare blankly at one another. When you turn to look at your daughter, she’s staring straight back. Smirking.

“Stop looking at me like that,” you clip, wincing again at the dribbling jam.

“Alright,” Joel utters, “I think you oughta take a test now.”

“That is not what this is,” you groan, petulantly pushing up from your chair.

He takes your hand, steadying you. “No? I was thinking about it, baby, and I don’t think we’ve been safe enough to be so sure.”

You dump your golden toast in the trash and turn, crossing your arms. Your shoulders lift. “We’re not being any less safe than we have been the last four years.”

“Safe,” Sarah says, and Joel holds a finger up.

“No,” he tells her. “No. Not that word. Go back to funny.”

She beams at him. “You’re funny, Daddy.”

He sighs, pacing over. “Look,” he lowers his plate into the sink, “I’ll take Duckie to the park. Let you rest up, give you a quiet house for the morning. But darlin’, if you’re not better by tonight, you’re takin’ a test.”

You grimace. “But she –”

“I know –” he grits his teeth, “– I know you don’t want her to be right. But I want you to be okay, more ‘n I want to prove my child wrong. Like it or not, you’re taking a damn test.”

Your eyes flit across to the kid swinging her legs in her chair, the splotch of jam down her Peppa Pig T-shirt. Your greatest accomplishment and your biggest challenge, wrapped up into a hundred-centimeter, jellybean-fueled monster.

Her cheeks lift, jam-covered and smug.

“Funny,” Sarah says, nodding.

The afternoon strings the sun high in the sky.

You’ve been home alone for the better part of an hour, busying yourself by cleaning to take your mind off the nausea tugging at your esophagus. Making and remaking beds, folding laundry until your fingers cramp.

Sarah’s room has never been tidier. Joel’s workshop has never seen so little dust. And you have never been more determined to prove your four-year-old wrong.

You’re lingering in the bathroom, the window gaping. Sucking in breath after breath of fresh air – which only serves to tickle the acid burning its way up your throat, entice it further.

You’re emptying the cabinets, reorganizing them into some senseless order. Playing Tetris with boxes of Band-Aids, slotting in tubes of toothpaste. You blindly reach behind your hip for the next box – a nearly empty thing which rattles when you lift it, jitters as though nervous.

You glance down.

“Fuck off,” you hiss, throwing it on the shelf beside some tampons.

It stares back at you, as blinding as the sun. The two display window examples, pregnant and not pregnant, like a wink peering out from the dull cabinet.

Your gums taste of bitter bile, rancid. Teeth furry and aching. Your entire body aches – though nothing quite so bad as the space below your ribs, still tender from all your retching.

Slowly, your hands slip down your front to cup your lower tummy. Rounder than before, suppler – bloated, even.

“’s from all the throwing up,” you tell nobody in particular. Maybe yourself. There’s a desperate edge to your voice, almost a plea.

But then – a plea to who? For what? There was nothing you loved more than carrying Sarah for nine months. Duck. Start saying duck. Baby Duck.

You were never on your own. She was right there. Someone to talk to, someone to complain to. Someone to weep to, in the quietest lulls of night.

Her language came to you as easily as your own. All her kicks and punches, her fucking acrobatics while you tried to sleep. It was love, in its most chaotic form.

And you loved her, the very moment you saw those two lines. The very moment you realized she’d been in there the whole time.

You realize now, squatted on your bathroom floor, that it feels the exact same. A warmth, radiating from your very core, if only you’d pay it enough attention to feel it.

Like there’s someone there. Right there.

“If you’re fucking with me,” you warn your stomach, reaching for the single test, “I will lose my shit.”

Love, in its most chaotic form bursts through your bedroom door no less than half an hour later.

“Hi, Mama!” Sarah sings, tearing through the room with her hands behind her back. Her knees bump against the side of your bed, the air about her summer-warm and pollen-sweet.

“Hi, little Duck,” you mumble, voice swollen. You wipe sleep from your eyes, asking, “How was the park?”

She answers with a wide grin on her face, whipping out a small, shabby bunch of flowers. Dandelions and daisies tangled around one another, loose petals scattering over your bedsheets.

“Oh, baby,” you push yourself up, ignoring the sickly weight in your stomach, “Are these for me?”

She nods. She dusts her hands free of grass when you take the bouquet. And then, as you smell them and hum with delight, she turns.

First, over to the dresser. She stares at her reflection, pokes at some of the makeup on the table. Then over to the window – where her breath fogs the glass. You hear the whack of Joel’s tailgate closing, and she tracks him into the house, before examining the windowsill.

You watch nervously as she drifts back over to the bed, a curious hop to her movements. Inspecting, like she knows there’s something waiting to be found. Someone.

“Did you have fun with Daddy?” you ask.

“Yep,” her small voice says, distant and distracted. She disappears into the dim bathroom.

You slump back down on the mattress, dropping the flowers in a clump on your bedside table. “I don’t even know when I fell asleep, baby girl,” you say through a yawn.

Sarah doesn’t reply.

“Duckie?”

“What’s this?”

You lift your head. “What’s wh…Oh, n-no, Duckie, wait –”

She flees past you, one fist raised and wielding the pregnancy test.

“Sarah! Jesus, fuck –”

You’re chasing after her before you have a chance to consider it – nausea be damned. She’s squealing something, roaring with laughter, blitzing out into the hallway. She swivels, ladders down the stairs backwards, leaps straight into the arms of –

“Christ, Sarah –”

Joel stumbles backwards with the force she throws at him. She’s safe in his arms by the time you reach the top of the stairs, waving the stupid stick around his head like it’s a magic wand.

“Daddy!” Sarah cries.

He glances up to you: hunched over the top step, panting, clutching your stomach. He pinches the test from her grasp. “What do we got here, baby duck?”

She kicks her feet. She has no fucking idea what they have, but she knows you didn’t want her near it – and if you know your kid, you know that’s all the catalyst she needed to fucking take it.

You slowly make your way down towards them, smirk growing the nearer you draw.

Joel glances down to the test. The creases by his eyes deepen. He hugs Sarah closer.

“Two...two means...pregnant, right?” he asks.

You sigh, nodding. “Mhm.”

His head lifts.

He breaks, the second he sees your expression. Eyes glassy, tears spilling onto your cheeks. The same smile you wore that June morning: sleep-deprived and shellshocked, a love pumping through your veins so strong that you thought you might burst with it.

Joel reaches for your hand, reels you in against his body.

“Shit,” he laughs, holding the test up.

Your shaking hands take it from him – though you already knew what it says. You were dreaming of it all when Sarah broke into your room.

Dreaming of linked hands and echoed giggles; of bunkbeds and matching surnames, of all four seats in the truck filled and all four chambers of your heart spoken for.

Dreaming of one on each hip, one in each hand. Dreaming of them tag teaming Joel, of the word kids slung with his southern twang. My kids, the kids, our kids. All ours.

Dreaming of two Sarahs, goddamn it. Because nothing ever completed your life as effortlessly as one Sarah, and – hell, she was born to follow in her dad’s footsteps and become the elder Miller sibling.

“Shit,” you agree, turning to sob into Joel’s chest.

“Duckie,” Joel says, voice hoarse and choked by tears, “You’re gonna be a big sister.”

She giggles, tracing the damp lines down your cheeks. As she reaches your jaw, the elation on her face slowly dwindles into something of a frown.

Your lips part to repeat it – a big sister, Duck – when her tiny voice steals the air from your lungs.

“Shit!”

[kquil]

POLY MARAUDERS | HEROES IN TATTOOS PART 4

04 : DISAPPEAR

SUM. : you find out the truth about the boys' relationship

REQUEST. : this might be a dumb question but are the marauders also all in a poly relationship with each other? if so, i'd love one where the reader finally has that realisation and gets all blushy and starts to consider if they'd ever want to include her —@thepunisherfrankcastle

TAGS. : modern au ; muggle au ; tattoo artist james ; tattoo artist sirius ; piercer remus ; only slight fluff ; mostly angst ; im so sorry ; reader finds out the truth ; but not really in the best way ; major misunderstanding trope ; sirius isn't a bad person! ; poly relationship revealed ; yay? ; distance ; walking away trope-ish ; james is precious ; remus trying to make the hard decisions ; our boys need a hug ; wolfstar ; starchaser ; angst angst angst ; im sorry im sorry im sorry!

LENGTH : 5.2k

← PREV. : 03 | GROCERIES

Hearing James giggling fills your chest with warmth and is so contagious that you have to bite your lip so as not to join him. He sees your resistance and moves his hand, making you freeze up and stop all movement. His index finger curls under your chin to lift your gaze as his thumb settles on your bottom lip and slowly draws it out from the press of your upper teeth. 

“I can’t be the only one laughing, angel,” on his face is an innocent smile but you know he’s devilish — the raging fire he lights up inside you with the smooth delivery of his simple statement is evidence enough that he’s up to no good.

His light grasp offers barely any resistance when you lift your chin away, “that’s because I’m not ticklish like you,” 

“Hey now,” he warns firmly but you can see the mutual playfulness reflecting clearly in his hazel eyes, it was like staring into clear honey, “you’re the one who’s colouring in my tattoo like a toddler,” 

“I was bored,” you defend a little too quickly, getting huffy and exaggerating a pitiful pout. It was… a sight, James admits in his head; you look adorable like this and he wants to frame the image in his memory forever, “and besides, you agreed to it,”

“Yeah, so don’t tease me about being ticklish,” his hand reaches up to play with a strand of your hair before he leans down to press a kiss onto your forehead, where you feel his mischievous smile lift up the corner of his lips, “instead, tell me how much you love to hear my laugh,”

There’s no way you’ll ever admit that. Not to his face, at least…

“Woah, comfy are we?~” came the familiar teasing voice of Sirius, who walks into the room and almost has his eyes bulging out at the sight of you and James, “you lucky bastard, Prongs,” Sirius clicks his tongue but there’s no malice in his eyes or tone, “shirtless, all relaxed and cool, leaning back into the sofa with our doll on your lap and colouring in your tats,” your cheeks heat up under your skin when a shameless expression takes over James’s face and he sends a wink over at his fellow tattooist. 

“I guess I saved the universe in a past life,” James chuckles, receiving an eye roll in return.

“And you, princess,” Sirius whistles playfully and leans down to kiss the crown of your head, “how lucky you are to have such well-sculpted muscles and a handsome face entertaining you,” the heat on your cheeks continue to blossom, “I don’t know who I’m more jealous of,”

That was the first time you were hinted at Sirius’s dichotomy. Between the wink he sends James and the satisfied grin the glasses-wearing brunette returns, you felt a slight shaking in your heart that you couldn’t quite place. 

It didn’t feel bad… but it didn’t feel good either…

After the first homemade lunch you made for them, you’ve gotten into the habit of regularly visiting the boys at the shop with boxed lunches whenever time nears noon. They often insisted that the first surprise lunch was enough thanks. 

“It’s really okay for you not to do this, dove,” Remus voices, slowly trailing off as he leans forward to wipe a stray crumb off the side of James’ mouth with his thumb, only to lick the crumb he wiped off without batting an eye. James pays him no mind either and continues savouring your cooking; he was always the one person who devoured your food as if he was a starved man being fed for the first time.

“But–” you quickly protest, trying to dismiss the small gesture between the two, “but I enjoy cooking for you,” 

“And we’re very grateful,” Sirius smiles warmly at you and takes your hand to press a kiss against your knuckles, “but your company is enough,” ever the flatterer and flirt, you resist the butterflies in your stomach from his gesture and words. 

“And we feel guilty that you have to buy and cook all this food,” Remus adds but you assure them one more time. 

“I promise I’ll stop if it ever gets too hard or burdensome but, for now, please let me do it…” the boys look at each other and smile following a unanimous sigh of defeat. You weren’t aware of the effect your soft pleas and pretty eyes had on them. Of course, they couldn’t say ‘no’ and agreed, satisfied with your pledge for the meantime. 

“Ugh! These cookies are amazing!” James praises, completely oblivious to the interaction you had with Remus and Sirius. He looks up and the three of you have to suppress your laughter at his childish appearance, crumbs surrounding his mouth as his cheeks puffed out from the food he still had to chew. 

“Swallow your food first, James,” Remus reminds, which James quickly does before addressing you again. 

“Can you please teach me?” James leans forward in earnest and you swear there are stars in his eyes, “please teach me how to make them so I can have them all the time. I’m an expert at making fruit tarts now but Moony and Padfoot are sick and tired of me making just fruit tarts,”

You were flattered but…“I want them to stay special though,” you pout softly, “I want to be the only person who bakes them for you,”

Before James could answer, Sirius breaks out into peels of laughter, “you don’t have to worry about that, doll,” he winks at you and side-eyes James with a smirk, “James sucks ass in the kitchen, especially when it comes to baking,” James shouts in protest but is swamped by the laughter shared between you, Remus and Sirius. Nevertheless, you finally agreed to teach him just so he stops pouting… even if he looked cute doing so. 

That Saturday, you were at their apartment, eager to teach James the secrets to your baking creations. Their flat was sizable and still relatively clean, which you verbally praise and are clued into all of their cleaning habits in more detail. It appears that they have a pretty good system going on that keeps things neat; Remus handles the organisation of all items and keeps stock on most things, Sirius proactively keeps all spaces clean and James loves doing laundry. When asked, he said that the main reason was because he liked the smell of clean sheets, which you couldn’t really blame him for. Together, their good habits cumulatively result in a tidy space and you were impressed; not only were they great friends but they functioned well together too. In some ways, you were envious of that. 

When you arrived at the apartment, the boys had all of the ingredients you sent over on a list laid out on their kitchen counters, ready to be put together and baked into your famous cookies. 

“Do you two want to join us?” you ask with a smile as James helped you into Sirius’ apron, tying up the strings behind you. 

“We’re good, darling,” Sirius smiles and offers to tie up your hair as James slips into his apron. You don’t deny his assistance and hand him over your hair tie as Remus observes the scene with a soft smile, leaning against the door frame that leads into the kitchen.

As much as Sirius and Remus disparaged James’ abilities to bake in the kitchen, he, once again, proved them wrong. He did pretty well with following your instructions and getting things done if you discounted the times he got distracted and had to pull you away from the work as well, just to share in the fun. The last time you baked together was a lot of fun and you were just as eager to get back into the kitchen with him in order to experience that joy all over again. Like last time, Sirius and Remus occupied the living room while you and James got to making the cookie dough before eventually baking the cookies. With the timer set, it won’t be too long before you’re happily serving everyone yours and James’ baked cookies with some tea and coffee. 

“It’s just down the hall,” James points out, directing you to their bathroom, “it’s the last door on your right,” with a quick word of thanks, you make your way out to relieve yourself while James gets started on clean up duty. You promised not to be too long so he didn’t have to clean all by himself but he just laughed it off and assured you to take all the time you need — ever the sweetheart. 

Your mood was light and happy and, like all other times you spent with the boys, it felt as if you were walking on air… that is, until you weren’t. From the corner of your eye, when passing the living room doorway, your heart came to a stuttering stop at the scene you happened upon. 

Seated on the sofa was Remus with Sirius’ laid down, his head on the tall brunette’s lap. It would have been a scene you could have easily shrugged off if it weren’t for Remus bending down so that the two could share a loving kiss. One that had Sirius running his fingers through Remus’ light brown hair, who returned the touch by tenderly gripping at Sirius’ thigh with a spare hand. You would have remained frozen there, like some petrified statue, if Sirius didn’t hum pleasantly only to have Remus chuckle against his lips. 

Hurrying to the bathroom, you struggle to get the scene out of your head as your heart breaks over and over again until the stinging pain in your chest dulls into a throbbing ache. 

If they were in a loving relationship then you were happy for them, truly…you were; they always looked so content and at bliss around each other, you felt stupid for not having put the puzzle pieces together yourself. It was just conflicting as to why they never hesitated to establish some sort of distance with you when they already had one another. They were together romantically and yet they were able to press loving kisses against your temple and wrap their arms around you with their loved one standing close by?...

“There you are,” James chuckles when you finally make it back into the kitchen, “I was starting to get worried that you somehow got lost on your way to the bathroom,” it was a weak attempt but you joined his laughter without offering to explain your whereabouts. Turning back to the sink, James returns to washing the dishes as you wordlessly get to wiping down the surfaces. He doesn’t appear to notice your sudden change in mood or, at least, he doesn’t let on that he knows; soon enough, he’s yapping away again, being his usual goofy self and drawing a smile from you. He almost makes you forget. You could always count on James to be your ray of sunshine; a happy bug who was eager to spread his contagious joy. 

Sirius and Remus were a… surprise, although you really should have known better than to not suspect anything. They’re happy though, and you’re happy for them; that’s what matters. 

It was hard to gauge whether or not you should confront them about the revelation you had about their relationship. You had to thoroughly think it over… 

There had to be a reason behind why Remus and Sirius didn’t want to tell you about their relationship and managed to get James in on it too. It must have been a very good reason. So you can’t fault them and resolve to stay silent on the matter. Their privacy needs to be respected; they’ll tell you when they’re ready, you’re sure of it. For now, you just have to act normal, as if nothing happened. The only problem was that you were left to wonder…

Why haven’t they told you? Is it awkward for them? Maybe they didn’t trust you enough? Did they think you were homophobic?— You’re not! You fully support all types of love in all its forms and would never be prejudicial towards them because they preferred the same gender. Or maybe they did trust you but the right time just never came up? That’s also plausible. They probably just need time…yeah! Time, you can give them that; you’re a very patient person, after all—

“—Dove?” 

“H-huh?” you blink rapidly, returning to the present as Remus tilts his head at you curiously. 

“Are you okay?” there’s an amused smirk painted across his lips as he eyes you up and down, “What’s going on in that pretty head of yours?” his warm voice is like a comforting hug on an autumn day, one that makes you want to lose all thoughts and melt into his arms. 

“Y-yeah!” you chirp as embarrassment begins to creep in, “Sorry about that,” he laughs with you, “I guess I got distracted,” Remus nods, understanding in his eyes as he turns to the clock on the office wall.

“The both of us have been at it for a while,” he hums when reading the time, “I think we deserve a break,”

“Snack run?” 

Seeing the delight in your eyes, Remus laughs and presses a kiss to your temple. It takes everything in you not to lean away out of respect for Sirius —you still need to act as normal as possible so you don’t draw attention but it’s getting harder and harder to do so, “snack run,” he confirms, his gaze lingering on your tight-lipped smile. It’s an awkward tilt of your lips and it doesn’t belong on your usually soft and brightly beaming features, Remus thinks to himself. He wants to ruminate on it’s appearance further but files away his thoughts for another day, “let me tidy up here first and I’ll meet you out front,”

Nodding stiffly, you hurry to leave and get to the front of the parlour, where you can safely catch your breath. There, you can recalibrate your thoughts and feelings from a safe distance—

Your gradually slowing thoughts come to a grinding halt as you pass. 

What did you just see?...

Angling yourself carefully and peeking through the crack of the door, you resist the urge to gasp in horror. In an otherwise empty tattoo room, Sirius sits in his tech chair and angles himself upwards as James stands and leans down to meet the former in a sweet kiss. 

Scandalised, you cover your mouth and step away from the door, suppressing a scream as racing thoughts pour into your head. 

SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!SiriusIsCheatingOnRemusWithJames!

All breath escapes you and the world begins to spin. The charming, loyal and honest character of Sirius that you’ve built up in your head breaks apart and you’re left spiralling at the implications of his betrayal. You feel like crying and vomiting and throwing a rage-filled fit all at the same time! Wait! —No! It’s not about what you want to do it’s about what you need to do and that’s to—

It was then that you hear Remus walking down the steps behind you. Your heart jumps in your chest and your stomach caves in on itself. Leaning forward, you peek through the crack in the open door again and find Sirius carefully prepping his tools for a later appointment while James is against one wall on the other side of the room, checking something on the computer. 

Good… Remus doesn’t have to see anything… you think to yourself, although the thought alone makes your heart break all over again. 

“Ready to go?” Remus asks, approaching you with a lifted brow of curiosity. He’s probably wondering why you haven’t made it to the front of the parlour yet. 

“I-I was just thinking!…uhh,” you bite your lip and try to keep your rising panic from reflecting in your eyes. 

“Hmm?”

“I don’t really want to go on a snack run,”

“Oh?” Remus didn’t even try to hide his surprise, it wasn’t like you to not go on a snack run — so much for wanting to act normal… “How come?”

“I just remembered something-!” it was a lame excuse but you could kill two birds with one stone through this, it’ll be worth it, “-something I wanted to talk to Sirius about—”

“You called?~” speak of the devil and he shall appear. Upon hearing his name, Sirius pulls open the door and flashes his usual charming smile, which only draws a chilling glare from you. Caught off-guard, Sirius blinks in surprise, “What’s the matter, dollface?”

A taunting whistle floats through the air from behind him as James steps up and eyes your unusually angry expression, “what did you do this time, Pads?”

“I-I don’t know…” his normally confident, unwavering voice stutters and is offered cautiously, almost scared despite the tattooist standing a good few inches taller than you. 

Finding some confidence, you square your shoulders and address Remus again but keep your glare focused on Sirius, “Why don’t you and James go on a snack run while I talk to Sirius?” you almost snap out the cheater’s name from spite. You can’t believe you ever deluded yourself into thinking he was a good person that could do no wrong. He’s charmed you, Remus and James, tricked all three of you and you weren’t going to stand for it. 

The two boys jokingly wish their friend ‘good luck’ as they walk past and head out, promising to get his favourites so he can nurse his wounds from the verbal beat-down he was about to receive with something yummy. It’s clear that James and Remus don’t really believe you’re capable of delivering much vengeance or rage but the fire in your eyes tells Sirius otherwise. As soon as the front door closes behind the two, you push Sirius back into the private tattoo room before he could utter a single word. 

“You need to explain yourself, Sirius Orion Black and you need to do it now!” you demand, your voice harsh and biting, something you’ve never done in front of the boys before and catches the traitor, in your eyes, by complete surprise. Sirius doesn’t know what he’s done but he already feels incredible guilt and sorrow over it. He’s never wanted to draw out such a horrid emotion out of you; you’re only allowed to feel happiness and love and comfort. Not this. Never this…

“I-I don’t understand, princess—” he reaches for you but you step away from his touch, your piercing glare and obvious rejection stabbing a knife through his chest. You’ve never pulled away from his reach before, he’s not used to this. What did he do? He would take it all back, whatever he did, if it meant that you would lean into his touch again rather than pull away. He’d do anything to quash the evident flames of rage in your eyes. What did he do?... What did he do goddamnit?! 

“I saw it! I saw everything! You’re playing both of them!” you shout, your rage lashing out and scorching him with their intense heat. There was no holding you back, you told him everything, about how you saw his kiss with Remus and James. His eyes widen in shock before filling with horror, which does nothing but corroborate your heart breaking revelations, “I don’t want to believe it! How could you do this to them, Siri?...” your shouting voice slowly quietens and tapers off at the end, quivering like a shaken autumn leaf. So heartbroken over the fact, your rage quickly turns into sorrow and tears quickly fill your eyes, “You’re better than that, I know you are!” and you really do. No matter how betrayed you feel and having witnessed the evidence first hand, you cling onto the little slither of faith you still had in Sirius, “Please tell them the truth, they deserve the truth… they deserve you being forthcoming with them because they’re good guys,”

Looking on at you, Sirius feels his heart break. This misunderstanding was tearing you up inside and, although it makes him happy to know that you would confront him and be angry for the boys at his supposed betrayal, watching you break down, and sob uncontrollably made Sirius’ heart twist and clench uncomfortably— painfully so. 

Without a word, he reaches out again and is able to bring you into his arms. You don’t return the gesture but you make no effort to push him away either. 

“Shhh Shhh Shhhhhh, darling…” Sirius whispers comfortingly, softly patting your hair as he waits for your sobbing to calm down enough for him to come clean. Scrap the plan, whatever bullshit plan they came up with to slowly ease you into accepting their relationship before selfishly asking for your love as well. He wasn’t going to let you continue misunderstanding their relationship, especially when it’s causing you so much pain, “...this is all a big misunderstanding…” he begins softly once your cries were finally reduced to soft sniffles, “do you know what polyamory is, sweetheart?”

“...n-no…”

“It’s when more than two people agree to be in a loving, romantic relationship with each other, all at the same time,” he explains in the same soft voice, his arms never pulling away from you as he feels you slowly lose your grip on resistance. 

“Is…is that…”

“Yes, that’s the relationship James, Remus and I are all a part of…” he looks down with a gentle smile and watches you peek up at him curiously. Sirius resists the urge to swoop down and pepper your face with kisses. Just when he thought his love for you couldn’t grow any bigger, here you were being the sweetest, most caring and lovable little thing he’s ever laid eyes on. 

However, you slowly begin to shake your head and the resistance in your eyes and expression returns. This time you push him away and keep him at arm's reach. Like a scared prey animal being cornered by a predator, you inch your way back until you're pressing yourself against the wall beside the door. It takes Sirius two steps forward to finally stop and keep his place so that you don’t feel pushed or stressed by his presence. 

“I-I won’t believe you until James and Remus say so…” 

He shrugs and gives you a pained smile. He supposes he can’t blame you for being cautious and not believing him, he’s the apparent ‘cheater’, afterall. 

You watch Sirius part his lips to voice something when you hear the parlour door open and rush into the hallway to see James and Remus walk in. The two were grinning cheekily at each other and their arms were piled high with an assortment of snacks. They held true to their promise; you could spot many of Sirius’ favourites among the pile and it made your stomach twist uncomfortably. 

As soon as the two look up and see your dishevelled form, your eyes pink and tearful, your bottom lip wobbling from restrained cries and your frame closed up like a frightened clam, the snacks are carelessly disregarded and they rush to your side. 

“Dove?” Remus calls, worry evident in his voice as he steals a glance at Sirius over your trembling shoulder. The response he was given — tight lips, drawn into a straight line and unreadable eyes — wasn’t enough, however and his chocolate pools hardened into brown stone. What. Did. You. Do?... Remus silently interrogated the tattooist.

“What happened, angel?” James immediately wraps his arms around you and you almost melt into his hold if it weren’t for your need to clarify everything dominating your thoughts. 

“Are you and Remus in a relationship with Sirius?” your hesitant voice, small and fraying at the edges, speaks up but barely above a whisper. The two men visibly stiffen beside you and you feel a well of tears quickly building up again; your thoughts immediately jumping to the worst possible outcome. 

“Tell her the truth. Give her peace of mind, lads,” Sirius speaks up, his own voice lacking its usual confidence and was reduced to a vulnerable softness. 

“Yes,” Remus affirms after a beat of silence. 

“We’re all consenting, we all love each other, mutually!” James pipes up, his tone bordering on defensive despite not knowing what he’s their relationship defending from, “You…you don’t think of us differently do you?”

“No! No no no! Of course not,” you quickly elucidate your thoughts, your shoulders relaxing as you turn and meet eyes with Sirius, mustering a small smile, “it’s actually quite a relief,”

Grinning softly, Sirius steps up to explain the situation, “Dollface over here thought that I was cheating on you and James with each other, Rem,” he chuckles softly, amusement in his eyes though it still lacked their full brightness, “she gave me a good shouting to and looked like she was ready to bite my head off if I didn’t ‘come clean’ to both of you,” Remus laughs and pulls Sirius into a sideways hug as James coos lovingly at you. 

“You got angry for us, angel?” James presses his face into your hair and nuzzles you affectionately, “you’re the sweetest~” he coos, his smirk growing as he feels an embarrassed heat radiating off your cheeks. 

“St-stop the James,” you whine with an awkward smile and wiggle yourself out of his arms, avoiding his pouting lips because you know your resolve will melt away at the sight. It was confirmed. They were in a relationship, all three of them, with each other. You should be happy that Sirius wasn’t a cheater and still the wonderful man you saw him to be. But, no matter how happy you were for them, the twisting of your stomach and the gaping hole in your heart wasn’t easily fixable. 

The following weeks, you maintained the friendship you had with the boys, who no longer felt the need to limit their intimate touches around you. However, whenever they tried to initiate affection with you, as per usual, once the innocent kiss on the temple and harmless hug was now fervently being rejected by you and pushed away. You had no intention of disrespecting their relationship, even if most acts of affection you exchanged as friends were innocuous. But, then again, it was also your way of protecting your already shattered heart. Yes, you could just stay away from them entirely but you had built such a strong friendship with them that it didn’t feel right to candidly pretend that you’ve never met them before. It’ll do more harm than the harm you were inflicting now…  

Ever the observant man that he was, Remus knew the instant reason behind your hesitation and was quick to reassure you the next time you were invited over for tea. 

“It’s really okay, sweetheart,” the tall brunette hums softly as James and Sirius agree from their own seats, “we’re okay with it and you aren’t going to come in between any of us, I promise you,”

Stubbornly, you shake your head, pulling a deep frown from all of them.

“Are you not comfortable with it?” James asks with uncertainty, his question and its potential implication is filled with enough dread to make even his two lovers stiffen up. 

You nod your head ‘yes’ and they slump in their rejection. It hurt to know that the revelation of their relationship had pushed you away when the basic nature of their affair meant more love for everyone. And they wanted it to include you… Their romance that led to such an abundance of love and promises of more was now paradoxically pushing you away. For once, they didn’t know what to do, not a single one of them could come up with any idea to resolve the ever-growing tension in your relationship. It was a rubber band ready to snap. 

“If you’re uncomfortable then we’ll respect that and keep our distance, touch-wise” Remus surrenders despite the heartbreak it gives him while Sirius shoots up and sends him an irate glare, one that Remus coldly returns. It wasn’t a question of their comfortability but yours, Sirius needed to regard that to the highest degree and Remus was all too ready to make him face the music. They can’t afford to lose you and if it meant that he needed to make the hard decisions then so be it.

“Thank you,”

“...do you not want to be around us anymore?” James speaks up, not necessarily taking things to their extremes but rather potential, future escalations. He’s seen it. In the days and weeks that followed the divulgence of their true relationship, bit by bit you have begun to pull away from them to the point where James can vividly see where the escalation of your behaviour will lead and it’s frightening. One day, you’ll just disappear and that terrifies him. 

“No no…” your weak defence, lacking true resolve, ignites a shock of terrorising fear in all three of them, their eyes shaking with trepidation. But you couldn’t see it because you couldn’t look at them, like a coward. Because that’s what you are — a coward. The heartbreak was chipping away at you. You thought you would be brave enough to see them happy together but you couldn’t. Because, not only were you a coward, but you were selfish too. Green with envy, you stewed in that awful, stomach-twisting, heart-aching, bitter-tasting, gut-wrenching feeling each time you saw every loving kiss, affectionate cuddle and sweetly whispered words. 

Throughout your friendship you grew to love each of them as more than a simple friend. You know it was wrong but they were all so charming in their own, unique way. They treated you sincerely, cared for you without any sinister, ulterior motives and they’ve successfully wormed their way into your life and heart, permanently. 

What was once something that brought you such joy, warmth and feelings of safety was now mercilessly ripping you apart. 

Their dynamic looked different to you now that you were looking through a different lens. They weren’t just close friends anymore, they were very much in love and have been romantically involved for a few years now — it was one of the first things you found out about their relationship. Its longevity was a testament to their unwavering love for each other and here you were, secretly, selfishly and salaciously hoping for your own slice of the love pie.  

How dare you…

Just because you’ve had such bad luck with love didn’t mean you had the right to wish for something that couldn’t possibly become yours. You have no right to ask them for love when they are completely content with their own.  

“Please don’t push us away, dollface,” Sirius begs softly, his steel grey eyes melting into a pool of mercury. Beautiful but poisonous. Something you want but can’t have. 

“I’m sorry,” you’re breathless when you see the genuine fear in their eyes and turn away from the sight. This isn’t the time to turn weak at the knees, “it’s getting pretty late, I should go,” shouldering your bag, you get up and rush to leave their flat. 

“Stay,” Remus half commands and half begs, almost stopping you in your tracks, “please stay… we need to talk to you about something important,” if there was any time for them to reveal the truth, it was now. Before they lose you, before they drown themselves in regret, before they fall into a pit of despair, before they—

“I’m sorry…” you repeat and, just as James feared, you disappear. 

A/N : this took such a long while to write but i wanted it to be perfect, thank you so much for requesting this darling @thepunisherfrankcastle it fit perfectly into the plot although i did make some slight altercations to your request. unfortunately, there's still more to go after this so i'm going to have to leave you darlings with a cliffhanger, look out for part 5! (˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧

→ NEXT. : 05 | DRUNK AND CIGARETTE SMOKE

NAVI. | HEROES IN TATTOOS M.LIST

TAGLIST : @melinajenkins @aastonishment @until-i-found-you @corp0real @sageskisses444 @celestcies @lovelydoveval @inlovewithremusjohnlupin @calums-betch @futurecorps3 @hihihi1112 @simpingforthe80s @yrluvjane @chaosofmanyfandoms @storyofaromance @loving-and-dreaming @somewereinthegalaxi @ashreblogsficshere @cassandra-nerezza-black @stray-bi-kids @ttkttt @notasadgirlipromise @ghostgardn @mess-is-my-aesthetic @susyelectra @fangirlninja67 @pagesfalling @thepunisherfrankcastle @axeofwars @imarimon @in-love-with-4-marauders @chicken-taco-burrito @valencia-rou @feast0nmeee @lestat-whore @hvmxjjk @twilightlover2007 @diaryofabiwoman @woohoney @celestialfantasiess @willbedecided @lovelyygirl8 @iiirhiane-g @mangodamochiii @queerqueenlynn @l3xiluve @brain-has-left @bunbunbl0gs @kneelforloki @citrusiove @virtualbuni @awkward-d3rs3-dr3amer @that1nerd-20 @wolfstar4everbitches @skepvids @dearmy-diary @littledollfacebaby @mylifeisnothing @em16cor @krazyk99 @imdoingbetternow @realalpacorn @remussbitch @swiftieeras1989 @lonely-nerd-sodaholic TAGLIST CLOSED

[l0v3tast3]

i’m fucking loving the pervy older boyfriends!!! how about pervy older johnny??

aa tysm anon !!! ヽ(*⌒▽⌒*)ﾉ i loved writing this hehe i've been wanting to write for johnny for awhile now too so thank u for the request!! <<33

✎ tags: mdni! nsft, f!reader, age gap (r is 20's, johnny is mid/late 30's), semi-public s3x, car s3x, dirty talk, abuse of pet names, innocence/corruption kink, breeding kink (r is on birth control), overstimulation, praise kink/degradation, loss of virginity, oral (f receiving)

✎ word count: 1.7k words (not proofread)

masterlist | requests are open!

✧ ˖ ° pervy older boyfriend!johnny who has an outrageously high sex drive whenever he's around you, or even just thinking about you. you're just the epitome of perfection to him, so sweet and pretty and smart, and you're all his. that fact alone always astounds him; unlike some others, johnny is aware he's a pervert. to be fair, it's only when it comes to you.

✧ ˖ ° he's just so happy to have you as his girlfriend, he can't help that he expresses his affection for you sexually! you've come to expect that as soon as you get into the passenger seat of his car, johnny's hand will holding the back of your neck to press your lips tighter against his. only when you're out of breath and your eyes are hazy will he draw away, cupping your face to peck a kiss to your nose before he's grabbing the steering wheel with one hand and your thigh with the other. he almost always ends up pushing his fingers into you and teasing you about distracting him when you end up moaning and grabbing at his wrist.

✧ ˖ ° unless he's taking you back to his house, johnny has a bad habit of pulling you into the backseat before you go on with your date. going to the movies or out to a restaurant? he parks in the back of the lot and fucks you slow to "not rock the car", but he just loves when you claw at his back and arms and beg for him to go faster (you've been banned from a concerningly long list of places because he just can't say "no" to you). one of his favorite places to take you out to are drive-in theaters, where he can sit you between his legs and finger you, stopping whenever you start making enough noise to attract the attention of the people around you.

✧ ˖ ° when johnny takes you back to his home, he does try to just spend some nice, non-sexual quality time with you, but he always says you're a fucking minx. if he doesn't make the first move within thirty minutes of settling into the couch, you will. in your defense, it's johnny's fault, and he'll also admit it. he takes pride in how much he's corrupted you, how addicted he's made you to him. he loves how reliant you are on him, especially for your pleasure; johnny will make damn sure that you won't be able to get off without his help after he gets his hands on you.

✧ ˖ ° "what's wrong, bonnie? it's only been a couple'a days, y'really miss me that much?" when you sheepishly mumble that you aren't able to finish yourself off anymore, a cheshire grin spreads over his face. "aww, poor little lass, y'need my help to cum? y'know i'll always help ya with that, c'mere."

✧ ˖ ° pervy older boyfriend!johnny who wants to get you pregnant so badly. he knows you're on birth control and he'll wear a condom or pull out if you say the word, but his favorite thought to get off to while he's away from you is stuffing you full of his cum and seeing your belly swell. johnny's always wanted a family; maybe two boys and a girl, a couple dogs, and a sweet little wife to come home to and wrap his arms around. who better to do that with that you, his sweet little girlfriend?

✧ ˖ ° this results in him practically jumping you the second you tell him you're on birth control. he has you whining and white-knuckling the sheets, the side of your face pressed against the mattress and your hips being held up by one of his hands in no time. the other is planted beside your head so he can lean down close to you. "y'want my baby, lass? how much?" despite the whole thing being his idea, johnny will still make you beg for his cum. "c'mon bonnie, i know y'can use your words. you'll look so pretty with our child, don't ya think?"

✧ ˖ ° when you finally choke out your best attempt of pleading for him to breed you, johnny has the biggest shit-eating grin on his face. and despite the rough strokes pushing your body further up the body with each time he bottoms out in you, he'll get sweet. he lays his front over your back and holds your hand with one of his, the other snaking down to your clit. "doin' so well, just a bit more, lass, one more for me. sh, shh, y'can bonnie, promise it'll feel good. we wanna make sure, right? it'll help y'get pregnant, jus' one more, bonnie," he coos into your ear, shushing you when you start whining from the overstimulation. at that point, when he's finally wearing down, you'll already have multiple loads of his cum dripping out of your abused pussy around his cock, so you're pretty damn sure, but how can you say no when he's making you feel so good still?

✧ ˖ ° it isn't entirely about starting a family with you, though. part of it comes from how territorial and protective he is of you. not in the way that he'll kidnap you to keep you from the dangers of the world, but in the way of wanting everyone to know that you're his. in public (around anyone, really) johnny is always touching you. a hand on your thigh, around your waist or shoulders, holding your hand. his favorite place is the back of your neck; the shiver he feels run down your spine when he brushes his thumb under your ear always makes him smile. but there's still that little bit of him that says it isn't enough.

✧ ˖ ° pervy older boyfriend!johnny who likes to make fun of you (in a loving way, of course). he doesn't go as far as humiliating you, but the way you try to look away and pout is just the cutest sight that johnny's ever seen. it'll be for any little thing, too. when your hips twitch as he grazes his hands over them. when you start forgetting to try and keep your moans and whimpers quiet. when your eyes start getting hazy while he sucks bruises into your neck that he'll wrap his hand over later. everything is fair game with johnny.

✧ ˖ ° and it doesn't take long for him to figure out how much you like it too. he sees the way your thighs rub together when he pins you against the kitchen counter or the hood of his car. he can feel the damp spot on your underwear spread even more when he brushes over your clit through the cloth. and the way you tighten up around his cock while he tells you what a good little whore you are for him when you let him use your sweet cunt. it's all because of how much fun he has teasing you near-constantly. johnny's ego definitely gets boosted to the high heavens when he catches onto how much you like his voice.

✧ ˖ ° he will definitely use your love of his voice to his advantage. it's just so easy, so tempting when you whine because he's holding your jaw so you can't look away while he fills your head with filthy words. "hah, i love y'like this, bonnie. so pretty with my cock fillin' ya up, doesn't it feel good? tch, i know it does, you're soaked for me lass. i got ya trained so well! sweet little girl, you'll really let me use ya however i want, won't you?"

✧ ˖ ° pervy older boyfriend!johnny who puts little to no effort into concealing just how much he loves ruining your innocence. when you first start dating, he'll wait as long as you want to until you're ready to lose your virginity; he takes it as an opportunity to come up with more ideas of what to do with you. once he does finally get his hands on you though, it's game over. your clothes are off of you before you even know it and he's kissing and licking and biting every inch of skin he can touch. johnny wastes no time in hunting for your most sensitive spots. he's making a roadmap of the best places to pull gasps and tiny mewls from your lips as quickly as he can, starving for any sound, any reaction he can get out of you.

✧ ˖ ° after you're covered in imprints of his teeth he makes sure you're begging for him to do something to make you cum. johnny will slip off your underwear, following it down your legs with more kisses and nips, and when he's finally get his mouth on your drenched cunt, he won't come back up until you're nearly sobbing, trying anything to get him to let up. your hands will be pinned against your stomach with one of his to hold you down simultaneously, the other working one, then two, then three fingers in and out of your tight hole. when they get tired he'll swap his tongue on your clit with them, his thumb resuming the shapes and letters he draws over the bud.

✧ ˖ ° as he lines up the head of his cock with your pussy he'll finally be soft again, kissing you deeply and wrapping your legs around his waist and his arms around you. then his tip pops past your entrance and, once again, game over. johnny knows he's pushing into you a little faster than he should, but you're already arching your back, clawing at his back, and you're so tight that he thinks he might lose his mind trying to hold back. the way your eyes are rolling back as he bottoms out makes his last bit of self-control crumble.

✧ ˖ ° johnny delights in pulling you down deeper into the depths of depravity with him. how after he finally relents and decides to show you mercy during your first time together you giggly airily, saying you didn't think it could be that good. how each time he tries something new with you he watches you get more and more desperate for him, his cock, his touch, anything he'll give you. johnny just wants nothing more than his pretty little darling to rely solely on him for her pleasure!

[pursuedbyamemoryy]

HIIII i saw requests were open… can you perhaps write some general relationship hc’s with arthur, john, and javier?? feel free to do anyone you like i just love them😊😊 thank you so much!!

☆ thank you for requesting, i got a little carried away with some of them hehe. i decided to add charles into the mix because he’s my fav and i couldn’t resist ;) i hope you enjoy reading <3 !!

🌾 arthur morgan

- he admitted his feelings to you by giving you a drawing he did of you that had a little note attached

- he draws you. all the time. before you got together, and while you’re together. he’ll draw you doing chores, sitting by the camp fire, sitting under a tree reading. he just admires you so much and can’t help but draw you

- he shows you everything he draws of you

- if you ask he’d try his best to teach you how to draw. he might not be the best teacher but he’d try his best

- he’s protective but not overprotective. he knows you can handle yourself but is always nearby just in case you need him

- once you’ve been together for a while he opens up to you about eliza and isaac. it’s a difficult thing for him to talk about but he trusts you enough to tell you

- he lets you wear his hat. you’re the only one besides himself who gets to wear it. he thinks it looks cute on you, plus he gets to use the cowboy hat rule excuse ;)

- he likes to get out of camp every so often just for some air and time alone. he used to go out by himself but after you got together he’d take you with him. sometimes it’ll be short rides and other times it’ll be staying out for a couple of days

- he can be a bit distant sometimes when he’s tired or stressed, and he prefers to be alone when he’s overwhelmed in any way. the only exception is you. he’ll reluctantly open up to you at first, but gets more comfortable over time, trusting you with how he’s feeling.

- he likes to joke around with you, and he really lets his playful side show when he’s with you.

- not a fan of PDA but loves cuddling with you in private. he prefers to be the big spoon, having you lay your head on his chest. he also really likes when you lay completely on top of him.

- his hands tend to wander while he holds you. he’ll idly trace patterns in your skin, running his hands up your spine or your arms.

- his love languages are words of affirmation and quality time

- he definitely calls you “my girl/boy”, or dear. not huge on pet names but will occasionally use them

🌾 john marston

- he’s a little oblivious to his feelings for you, which means you most likely confessed first

- i feel like he first started to really fall for you after the wolf attack, but just never spoke up about his feelings for you until you said something

- he’s also pretty protective of you, he comes off a little more harsh than arthur does but it’s all in good reason

- if there’s ever a situation where someone’s bothering you or even threatening you, john will step in immediately, doing anything and everything he can to scare off whoever’s causing problems

- is not afraid to get into a fight in order to protect you, which has resulted in lots of scolding and a couple more scars for him. he doesn’t mean to scare or worry you, he just cares about you too much to let someone talk bad about you or threaten you in any way

- he’s very touch starved and doesn’t realize it until you get together

- the first time you hug him is when he realizes. it was an awkward hug on his part, but he loved feeling you in his arms

- a lot of his touches are awkward at first, not because he doesn’t like it but because it’s something new to him. he’s unsure about where to put his hands, where he should look, etc

- he starts to get more comfortable with touch as you spend more time with him. eventually he’ll touch you out of habit. a hand resting on the small of your back, or on your thigh while you sit in front of the campfire together. small, innocent touches.

- he loves cuddling at night, and often prefers to be the one being held

- overall he really loves you and cares about you, he wants to be the best he can be for you

- you’ve caught him staring at you from across camp sometimes, a small, affectionate smile on his face

- his love language is words of affirmation.

- he likes pet names and uses them often, his favorite being babe or baby

🌾 javier escuella

- javier is one of the most romantic camp members in my opinion

- he definitely confessed first

- you both liked each other and were quite obvious about it, constantly flirting with one another, but he’s the one who asked you out first

- i like to think he asked you out through a song somehow

- either that or he came up to you, all flirty and asked you out to a night in the town (whichever was nearest to your current camp) , offering you a flower he found while he was out of camp

- plays his guitar for you ofc

- he also totally writes songs and dedicates them to you

- is more than willing to teach you how to play if you ask

- very touchy if you’re okay with it. he always has his hand on you or his arm wrapped around you

- he is very into PDA. he has no problem cuddling and holding you in front of the gang and he definitely does once he knows you’re okay with it

- you two will cuddle up near the campfire together, you sitting in his lap whenever he’s not playing his guitar

- he also loves cuddling before you fall asleep

- after you’ve been together for a bit he’ll invite you to sleep under his tent with him. he feels safe and comfortable with you, quickly falling asleep in your arms

- tells you stories about mexico and his family and life there. he has so many stories and will tell you each and every one

- you’re the one person he trusts to tell more personal stuff, he definitely opens up to you more after a while of being together. not only about his life in mexico but the harder parts of it, the stuff he doesn’t really tell anyone

- likes getting dressed up with you every one in a while and going out to saint denis or other cities, spending nights dancing and drinking together. he loves little dates away from camp

- takes you fishing with him. even if you don’t fish you’re going with him at least once, per his request

- if you like fishing then he’ll take you out on fishing trips often. just the two of you camping out by a lake for a day or two, fishing and spending time with one another

- overall he really loves when you ask him to teach you things because he can see that you take genuine interest in the things he likes. anything from guitar, fishing, to even spanish, he’s always willing to teach if you want to learn.

- uses spanish nicknames for you. hermosa, querida, mi vida, mi amor, cariño, etc. any and every pet name in the book, except in spanish

- he always flirts with you. even after you’ve been together for a while, his flirting never dies down. he’s always complimenting you, no matter what. even if you’re exhausted and dirty from being out on a job he still has a compliment for you.

- gets you a knife similar to his own. he wants you to be able to protect yourself, and he likes having something matching between the two of you <3

- shares his poncho with you if you get cold

- he lets you play with his hair and he’ll let you put it up for him

- he loves kissing you and he’s not shy about it. he’ll kiss you anywhere, anytime, he doesn’t care who sees.

- his love languages are touch and quality time. he just loves being near you

🌾 charles smith

- it took a while for charles to realize his feelings for you and you definitely had to approach him first.

- he’s quiet at first, but will open up to you as you get closer and spend more time with him.

- he’ll tell you everything he knows about his family and the stuff he went through as a kid once he feels comfortable with you

- a great listener. he could listen to you talk for hours, and often does. whether you talk about a job you went on, the chores you did that day, a clothing item or piece of jewelry you saw, or stories from your life, he’ll listen.

- not only will he listen, he’ll remember. he’ll remember every little detail, and often surprises you with the things he remembers.

- there’s lots of comfortable silence between the two of you. you’ll often work side by side without speaking a word but enjoying each other’s company. he could be making some arrows or sharpening the camp axe while you read or finish up a small chore like sewing up a hole in someone’s clothes.

- his love languages are definitely quality time and acts of service.

- he’ll do little things to help you out. he’ll do his own laundry so it doesn’t add to the laundry you already have. he’ll clean your guns and sharpen your knives for you. he’ll brush your horse and braid its mane when you’re busy and haven’t had time to. small things that make a difference.

- definitely teaches you how to hunt and track. you’ll go out with him each time the gang needs food, getting time away from camp which you both enjoy. takes you to all his best hunting spots, teaching you all his little tips and tricks to getting a clean kill.

- he’s not big on PDA and often gets embarrassed if someone sees you kissing or anything.

- he definitely gets used to it the longer you’ve been together, but he prefers to save all that stuff for behind closed doors.

- it’s not like he won’t kiss or hug you in front of anyone else, he just gets a bit flustered

- eventually you’ll move into his tent with him, and once you’re alone he’ll be a lot more physically affectionate

- he also enjoys cuddling. he’s spent a lot of time alone, sleeping in the wilderness by himself before he joined the gang, so sleeping next to you if very comforting to him.

- he doesn’t use a lot of pet names, but his favorite is “my love”.

- although he knows very little about his mother’s culture, he’ll share what he knows with you. he’ll tell you old stories that she told him growing up, and the significance of bison. you showing interest in his culture means a lot to him.

[sorceresssundries]

Thunder and Lace

Pairing: Rolan x Fem reader

Summary: The very busy and important master of Ramazith's tower is instructed to spend the day wearing your delicate, lacy underwear.

Warnings: Tail play, Smut

Word Count: 2.7k

A/N: So, the brain worm evolved. This is a treato for my pal @orangekittyenergy! (Not completely selfless, I have very much being enjoying the thought of Rolan in lacy underwear.)

You watch him from your comfortable position in bed, still dozing. The space next to you, where Rolan had been just minutes ago, is now cool and empty. Your leg feels forlorn without his tail hugged round it, as is his habit while he rests -  mooring himself to you even in the dreamy tides of sleep.

“Come back to bed,” you murmur, your voice thick with leftover tiredness.

“Can’t. Cal organised the scrolls completely inadequately yesterday, he has muddled up all the abjuration and conjuration sections like a dolt.” he mutters something else as he moves around the room, but it is infernal and too low for you to make out. His tail swishes with annoyance, and all you can think about is the squeezing heat of it. 

You slip out from beneath the covers, still in the underwear you slept in, and press yourself against his back as he ties up his hair. Your lips, swollen from the night’s fervent kisses and playful bites, brush softly against the freckles adorning the strong, defined planes of his shoulders. The early morning light filters stubbornly through the closed curtains. 

“I’ll make it worth your while” you hum against the warmth of his skin.

“I…” He begins to protest, but his words flicker out with his resolve. You trace a finger down his spine, drawing slow, gentle lines around the base of his tail, bumping down and over the ridges that just hours ago you were grinding against in a maddening heat. Reaching around, you stroke his erection as intently you did then. His breathing hitches, caught off guard by the same memory. He turns to press his forehead against yours, a growl rumbling deep in his chest. “Seductress,” he purrs.

“Me?!” You bat your eyes at him innocently and move your fingers until you are raking through his coarse, dark pubic hair. His erection bumps against your abdomen. You lean forward, pushing your nose against the soft skin below his ear, catching his musky scent as you gently suck on his earlobe before whispering, “I could be much, much worse.”

There is a moment of heavy hunger where you think you have won, and Rolan will drop his duties like coins down a well and spend the entire day chasing pleasure with you in streaks of sunlight and stretched out hours. 

The moment passes. 

“Shit,” he mutters, noticing the time. “I’m going to be late.” You love seeing him like this—all his sharp thoughts blunted. He’s the wickedly clever archmage, the gifted master of one of the most prominent Wizard’s Towers on the Sword Coast, yet you’ve reduced him to a word-wrecked mess of a man more times than you can count. Around you, his sentences slip and his concentration crumbles into dust. It makes you giddy.

“I can’t find my underwear,” he says, rummaging through his drawers. You smirk. It’s tricky to be empathetic when you’re very much enjoying watching him storm around the room naked. His face bears that indignant little frown he wears so well, and his lithe tail flicks around in annoyance. A dishonourable person would probably have hidden his things on purpose just to elicit this kind of delicious reaction… or as part of a wicked plan.

“Here,” you say, sliding your delicate, lacy underwear down your legs with a shimmy. “You can wear these.” You throw them to him nonchalantly, and he is so taken aback he doesn’t even try to catch them. They land on his shoulder, draping in wait—a black web of flimsy lace against his claret skin.

You act as casually as if you’ve just handed him a hairbrush or a towel. You move around the room, tidying up clutter and beginning your morning routine, all the while relishing his stunned reaction.

“Are you kidding?” He thinks you are teasing him. 

You move back to him and rake your nails gently along his erection, burning your gaze into his. "Do I look like I'm kidding?" you murmur.

He hisses and tilts his head back in pleasure. You take the underwear off his shoulder and kiss down his body—slowly, reverently. His hands clench and unclench at his sides. You know he desperately wants to run his nails over your skin and ball them in your hair, but he won’t. Not unless you tell him to.

You lower yourself until you are kneeling on the ground in front of him, and you notice that even his toes are curled. 

“Step into them.” You say as you press a heavy kiss to his calf. He does as he is told, placing a foot carefully into each gap. Pretty impressive given his legs are shaking. You pull them slowly up his legs, letting the lace chase your licks and kisses up his skin. You pause as you get to his erection, and give it a long, indulgent stroke with your tongue before finishing your task and stepping back to admire your work. 

The black lace of your underwear looks sinful against his crimson skin. It is tight against his muscle, and he is straining against it - desperate to get to you.  Luckily, your curves mean the fit isn’t too tight. He looks delicious, perhaps you would let him wear your silken negligee next. 

“How do they feel?”

“Restrictive.” he says running his finger around the waistband “And, erm.. Damp” His golden eyes were molten. 

“Well, I awoke from a very vivid dream about you, my love.” You curve your body into him, and move close enough to let your breath dance with his. “Well, less of a dream and more of a memory” He makes a whiny little noise which makes your stomach twist. “I hope the busy and important Master of the tower doesn't get too distracted thinking about how tight, and wet they are all day long.”

It proves too much. His lips crash against yours, starving. You smile and allow him a few moments to taste the heat of your tongue before pulling away.

“You’re very late.” 

“Fuck.” He says, prising himself away from you pulling on the rest of his robes in a clumsy rush. He catches a glimpse of himself in the mirror, flushed and unkempt.

“Fuck. Ok” He kisses you once, chastely, and then again. And once more… “Ok, i’m going now.” You giggle as he doesn’t move and presses another kiss to your cheek, your nose, and then one final one to your mouth. “Fuck” He tears himself away, practically falling out the door to get to work. 

After a long and luxurious shower you drag yourself through the portal to help out around the shop. It’s so crowded with people asking repetitive, inane questions that you barely have any time to flirt with Rolan. It makes you feel pouty, especially thinking about how grumpy and uncomfortable he must be in your restrictive underwear. You just want to play with him. 

After a while, you finally seize a brief respite and saunter over to where he is engrossed in paperwork and mundane administrative tasks behind the front desk. He wears his best surly look, the one you adore stealing away with a few well-placed kisses across the freckles that dapple his stern features. His frown used to be stone-carved, his demeanour so clouded and thunderous you worried the sun might never reach him. But you slipped through, like sunrise and sea breeze, slowly and gently wearing down his defences. It took gentle hands and even gentler words, but now, the moments when he reverts to his familiar frowns are a sweet reminder of how easily they can pass.

“Are you alright, my love?” you ask with sparkling innocence as you perch next to him on the counter. “You look a little out of sorts.” 

He looks at you as though you are a fire he wishes to extinguish.

"I am perfectly fine, thank you." He kisses you on the cheek in a perfunctory, reflexive manner that makes you grin. You are a part of his routine, and the idea that he reaches for you instinctively, as if pulled by gravity, makes your heart flutter. He is your sun. A grumpy sun, but yours nonetheless.

“What a relief! For a second, I thought you looked little… Distracted.”

He brushes past you to grab a book, and as he does his fingers graze across your thigh. Too briefly, too gently. 

“I wouldn’t be much of an archmage if I let myself get distracted, now would I?” He gives a sultry smile, but his eyes deliberately avoid yours. You know it’s because if he met your gaze, you’d see the barely contained fluster in them.

You let your hand brush against his, and hear the quickening of his breath. "Good to know. I wouldn’t want to be responsible for keeping the great Rolan from his important duties."

He finally looks at you, his eyes back to molten gold ."You are a menace," he says, but there’s no real bite to his words.

You answer with a wink, a wicked grin spreading across your face.

You start to work away next to him, flicking through various notes and business accounts at the desk, and you feel a pressure against your ankle that makes you gasp, until you look down and see Rolan’s tail starting to twist its way around your ankle, slow as a creeping vine.

You turn to glare at him, but he doesn't acknowledge you at all, just carries on making a list of inventory. 

Sometimes, in moments of concentration, his tail reaches for you involuntarily. As natural and instinctive as a plant reaching for sunlight. Is this one of those times? The purposeful creep of the tail under your robes and up your calf makes it feel as though there's definite intention in its journey.

You don’t have time to play your next move.

“‘Scuse me,” comes a voice at the counter. “I bought a potion recipe from you, but I can’t seem to get it right. Could you talk me through it?”

Rolan, usually standoffish and curt towards 'idiots who wouldn’t know a hill giant’s finger from a dried sausage,' is surprisingly cheerful towards the customer.

“Why, of course. My delightful and highly knowledgeable associate here would be happy to go over every detail with you, wouldn’t you, Tav?” His eyes glint, and his tail squeezes you slightly.

“Erm, yes. Of course.” The man, a dwarf, barely taller than the counter, luckily cannot see Rolan’s tail disappearing under your robes.

He asks you to go through each step of the potion in detail, hoping to pinpoint his mistake. You lean over the desk, arms folded tightly, trying to focus on the instructions. You dare not look at Rolan, who stands next to you, still writing a list on that infernal piece of paper. How is he multitasking so well? You think about how uncomfortable he must be in your underwear now; His scent would have mingled with yours, the two of you blending into the delicate gusset of the skimpy, thin piece of material. Later, when you were alone, you would tear it from him with your teeth and...

“Excuse me? Miss…”

The man is frowning at you; you had drifted off to a whole other plane. One where Rolan’s cock sits stiff and heavy in your mouth. You swear you could hear him stifle a laugh next to you.

“Erm, yes, sorry… Right… so…” you begin to explain exactly the temperature needed to create the concoction just as the tip of Rolan’s tail reaches the soft flesh of your upper thigh. It is still sensitive and stained with the purple bites he had lavished upon you the night before, and you have to stifle a gasp as he grazes over them, the blooms of past conquests mapping his way forward.

Suddenly the tail halts, and Rolan’s posture stiffens next to you in realisation. You aren’t wearing underwear. Of course you aren’t. After slipping him into your lust-soaked lingerie, you had decided not to put on any more, determined that at some point in the day you would corner him in some private cupboard and get your underwear back from him. Stretched and well-worn.

For a second, you think he might abandon his intent, worried about his professionalism or reputation as the highly respected wizard of Baldur’s Gate. But lust must have won over sanity, as it doesn’t take long for his tail to push upwards, the length of it coiling and gently squeezing around the full length of your leg, the spade tip lightly stroking around your vulva.

How does he have so much control over it now? When it seemed so often it would wave, sway, or even vibrate without him having any say in the matter. Bloody mysterious, frustrating, sexy Tiefling.

You continue with your explanation to the now quite unimpressed customer, who is infuriatingly slow to catch on to your instructions. You refuse to let Rolan win; you would never hear the end of it.

You gasp audibly as you feel a light stroke against your clit. 

The customer frowns and raises an eyebrow at you.

“Sorry, erm, I was just shocked at how much rogue’s morsel you were using… AH…” The end of the tail has begun to vibrate softly, and Rolan is making a low, subtle purring sound next to you. Bastard.

“I’m so sorry…” you say as professionally as you can to the customer through gritted teeth. “I just need to… ah… get to the store cupboard to see if we have…” You can feel the clenching building and building in that low point of your abdomen. You absolutely cannot fall apart leaning against the counter where you work. “...have the ingredients you need, if you’d excuse me I’ll just be two minutes, illberightbackimsosorry” you manage to stutter before hastily moving away from the counter and grabbing Rolan tightly by the back of his robes, dragging him into the first supply closet you come across.

“What the hell are you thinking?!” you say as you immediately push yourself against him, licking and suckling at his exposed throat, feeling it pulse with the hot blood coursing through him - giving him away.

“I’m sure I don’t know what you mean,” he gasps as you give a firm bite, not caring if you mark him. Let every citizen of Baldur’s Gate see the Master of Ramzith’s tower covered in marks like some kind of horny teenager. It was his own fault.

“You and that fucking tail,” you purr as you wind your fingers into his soft hair.

“Oh?” you feel the rumble of his chuckle vibrate against your lips on his throat. “Silly thing must have been acting of its own accord again.”

As if to punctuate his point, his tail coils around your waist, holding you firmly against him.

“Ah, I see,” you pull your face back to gaze at him fully. His eyes are lidded, his skin flushed from pink to deep scarlet. He's so beautiful. “We’ll have to do something about that.”

With a mischievous glint in your eyes, you release his hair and trail your fingers down his chest, feeling the rapid rise and fall of his breath. His tail tightens around you, 

You press your lips against his, fierce and hungry, and his response is immediate, his hands finding their way to your hips, pulling you closer until there’s no space left between you. The heat of his body seeps into yours, and it feels like you are lit from the same fire.

You break the kiss, trailing hot, open-mouthed kisses along his jawline and down his neck. His breath comes in ragged gasps, his fingers digging into your skin as he tries to hold onto control.

You move your hand to stroke up along his tail, grazing slow and purposeful against each raised ridge as you do. 

“Tav, wait..”

“Oh no, my love.” You voice is more breath than words. “Is this not what the damn thing wanted? All this attention?” 

Without giving him any kind of warning, you grip the base of his tail and give a sharp tug. 

The effect is immediate and his gasp choked.

You kiss him softly and keep him gripped to you as he catches his breath and regains his burnt-out composure. His forehead rests against your shoulder. 

“Oh dear, Master… did I just make you come in your pants?” your voice is smug and light.

He groans sheepishly, not looking at you. “No darling... You just made me come in yours.”

[babygorewhore]

Requested by my angel, @redhead1180 I hope you enjoy this!!! Dividers by @cafekitsune

Can’t stop thinking about…Stalker! JJ…and his dirty habit when you’re sleeping…

Warnings! Don’t read if you’re not comfortable with these themes. Dark! JJ! Stalking! Drugging reader! JJ jerks off while you’re sleeping and cums on you. But he doesn’t actually touch you sexually. Non con masturbation.

JJ couldn’t resist it anymore. You were such a sweet girl. New in town. New to the entire life of the outer banks. You had the brightest and sweetest smile. So…unaware and clueless to what he did when you were sleeping.

It started off with just following you around. To make sure you were safe of course. That’s all. But then it got more intense. He had to also track your location on your phone. At all times. Soon, it escalated to JJ watching your house at night. Just standing there looking at you through the window. You couldn’t know this. A precious girl like you needed to be protected. Even from him.

Yet, JJ finally caved in one day. He hung out at your house and he slipped something in your drink to relax you. Just something to put you to sleep for a while. You looked so beautiful while you slept. A gentle angel as he set you in bed.

Your chest rose and fell as you slumbered. Hopefully dreaming of something nice. JJ’s dick felt like it would explode out of his pants. Weeks of following you, tracking everything you did, he had never touched you. That was his limit. He’d never actually touch you without your knowledge or desire.

But he fell into this nasty little routine.

Some nights when he hung out with you after work, he’d slip the same relaxing content into your drink, carry you in bed and once you were all nice and tucked in…

JJ would take his cock out, pump himself up and down while he looked at you. His hand wrapped around his dick, leaking with precum as he imagined it pulsing in your pussy. God, he wanted to fuck you. He wanted to feel how tight your cunt would be squeezing him but his fist would have to suffice for now.

His fingers dripped from his seed as he tugged himself, thrusting his hips hard as his eyes squeezed shut from pleasure approaching him. He stepped closer, hovering over your sleeping form as you laid on your back. JJ bit his lip hard enough to draw blood as cum spilled all over his hand and onto you. His cum splattered all over your chest and arm.

It was sick. He knew that. But his obsession was only growing when he took out his phone and took a picture.

Would it truly hurt to just sleep next to you? You were so kind to him. Surely you wouldn’t mind. JJ tucked himself back into his pants and crawled next to you. He just pressed his arm next to yours on his side. His blue eyes took in your pretty face.

Eventually, he dozed off. JJ woke to your soft voice and stirred. You stretched with a smile and looked down at him. “JJ? You stayed over? I don’t remember falling asleep.”

He shrugged and grinned innocently. “Yeah, I hope that’s okay?”

“Of course it is. Let me make you some coffee and breakfast okay? It’s the least I can do for you, being so sweet and carrying me to bed.” You giggled and he flashed his eyebrows at you.

“Aw, you’re such a doll. Any more offers like that, and I’ll have to marry you.”

You scrunch your nose and look down. You tilt your head curiously. “That’s weird. I’m all sticky. Maybe I was having a weird dream?”

JJ shrugged innocently. “Maybe! But I was asleep too.”

You sigh and get up from your mattress. “Come on, JJ. I’ll get dressed and be right down.”

JJ obeyed with all his strength. He wanted to confess. Badly. But it wasn’t time yet.

@xxbimbobunnyxx @rafesthroatbaby @marchsfreakshow

[fic-over-cannon]

hi sun! for the prompts how about carving pumpkins + childhood friends to lovers with the one! the only! jaytodd <3

sanne my love, anything for you (and for him)

the first time you meet jason todd, you're bored out of your mind at a gala that your parents' forced you to attend, dress shoes pinching at your toes. he's slow to smile and half-hides behind his adoptive father's legs but you offer to show him where the best snacks are on the buffet table and you become fast friends after that

it's easy being friends as children, only arguing over who's house to play at and which toys are better. you start going to school together and it only draws you closer, making faces behind the backs of stuffy teachers and helping each other out with last minute homework

puberty changes things a bit, a new awareness of jason's lanky limbs and cracking voice while your own body starts to swell and change. innocent, accidental touches become supercharged with awkwardness and you can't seem to hold his gaze without stuttering. it's a relief then, when he asks with sweaty palms if you want to go to the end of school dance together. you laugh, because he asks in march but he's dead by april and you don't laugh so much anymore.

you attend his funeral, dress shoes still pinching your toes, murmur your condolences to bruce and dick. you leave a part of your childhood in that grave with him, the tendrils of first love and fluttering innocence.

as you grow up, you drift away from the waynes though you still see them sometimes socially. you try to date, relationships that fizzle out each time by the haunting what if that rests in a gotham graveyard.

it becomes a habit to visit him, to talk as if jason could hear you, about each disastrous date, the goings on of your life, and how you wish he were still here. always, you are the only one there to visit him, so when a stranger walks up behind you one afternoon, you're surprised by the company. he strikes up an awkward, if not sweet, conversation with you about your loss and you walk away feeling a little less lonely.

he appears more often, this stranger, when you visit jason's grave. always asks after you and your family, the friend you wish was still with you. you never see him very clearly; he always has his hood up, always stands at an angle. but he is kind to you in your grief and so you allow him his little idiosyncrasy. still, in the flashes of an upturned mouth and errant curls of hair, you see glimpses of the person jason could have been.

you thank your dead friend for sending him to you, this reminder that life always goes on but at least jason will live on in the people that knew him. you ask jason for his forgiveness, that as much as you love him, there might be room in you to love this man too. the dead don't speak but the sudden burst of wind feels like a blessing as it lifts the tears from your cheeks.

you gather up the courage and ask the stranger if he would like to meet sometime, as a date, outside of the graveyard. he startles and his hood slips back, helped on by the wind. you can't help but gasp as you finally see his face. older, more scarred, but still impossibly jason.

you can request more headcanons as part of sunnie’s soft autumn

[cinnbar-bun]

Hugs and Kisses (One Piece) Pt.2

Featured Characters: Robin, Franky, Chopper (platonic only!), Brook, Jinbei

Scenario: How they like to give hugs and kisses to you <3

Rating: SFW

You can read this on my AO3 here!

Chopper (this is platonic!)

Chopper really loves being held and kissed by you. 

While you’re not his dad (Zoro) or his mom (Robin), you’re very up there when it comes to Chopper’s affections. 

He loves when you scratch his ears and feed him cotton candy. 

He likes just sitting on your lap. It’s comforting, and feels he can trust you a lot to keep him safe and hold him.

While he says he doesn’t like to be babied, it’s obvious once he’s in your arms that he really loves how secure you make him feel. 

You’re like a… hm… cool older sibling! Yeah! That’s it! He goes to you often for fun or to help sneak him something he may want, and you’ve become something like a sidekick to his habits. 

Not that you mind, he’s your baby bro Chopper. If Mom and Dad say no, well, he can always go to you (and 99% of the time, you give in). 

Robin 

Ever the elegant and mature woman, she will be more likely to express her emotions and love for you in more private settings. 

It kinda traces back to her personality and history, she’s just worried you’ll be an even bigger target by being seen so closely with her (the last thing she’d ever want is for you to be captured or tortured because of her) 

But in an innocent way… she would like to play the part of a “normal” couple. She knows it’s a pipe dream, considering she’s the Devil Child and you’re both a part of the Straw Hats, but still. 

That’s why, if you want to surprise her, hold her hand in public on slower days, like in the market or at a wonderful view of a flower field. She's touched when you do that, and she decides to join you in playing along as the “normal” couple she sometimes fantasizes about. 

She's never had anyone she was close to in the way you are to her, so she’s very protective of you. If she feels you are in danger or someone is trying to fight you, she immediately stands in front of you. 

She prefers hugs in private, where she can pull you close and hold you without fear of being hurt or seen. When she gets more comfortable though, she’ll wrap an arm around your shoulder or keep an arm around your waist so you two can be close. 

Robin can be a bit of a tease, and while normally her kisses are simple pecks on your forehead, cheek, or nose, she can and will put on bold red lipstick and kiss you, leaving an obvious stain (she may or may not tell you). 

Perhaps it’s something of a possessive streak coming in… and, well, she kinda can’t help it. You’re too cute. 

Franky 

Should be obvious, but Franky is SUUUUUPPPPERRRR into PDA. He’ll just sweep you in his arms and throw you over his shoulders, or snuggle you like you’re a teddy bear (and seeing how big he is, you kinda look like one). 

He doesn’t get embarrassed by what others think, he’s just wanting to hug you and kiss you lots when he feels like it. 

He’s so needy when he’s not building things. Straight up will beg to be able to hug you and sob if you have to decline. 

Despite his eagerness to be with you at almost all times, he’s not gonna jeopardize you or anyone else in a serious situation. He knows there’s a time and place for things, and he won’t try to be physically affectionate in the midst of a battle. 

He will, however, wink and say that once this is over, you owe him some kisses and hugs. 

If you compliment and hug him, he’ll give himself an ego trip and smirk. He knows he’s super, but when you say it, it just makes him feel uh- super-er! 

He likes you sitting on his lap most. It’s so comfy having you there, and he likes resting his chin on top of your head. 

Often likes to look at what you’re doing when in these positions. If you’re reading, for example, he likes to try and follow along with it. If you’re doing something like say… gaming or drawing, he’s happily watching to see what you’ll do next. 

He might even create something to go with your favorite hobby to make it easier/better for you! 

Brook 

Brook is a gentleman (for the most part), and so he won’t do anything forward without your permission. 

Listen, he’s always going to be down for you wanting to hug, hold his hand, or kiss him. He will make many, maaany jokes about how he “can’t feel it cuz he’s dead” and laugh his signature laugh, but he really does treasure your affection. 

Sure, he can’t feel it or reciprocate it back the way he could as a human, but he does enjoy and appreciate how effortlessly you make him feel like one. 

Similar to Robin, the idea of a relationship, especially in his physical state, was nigh impossible in his mind. But you, for some reason (he’s still trying to figure it out), loved him, even for all the reasons you really shouldn’t have. 

Also like Robin, when you hold his hand or kiss his cheek (or where his cheek would be if he had one-), he feels almost… “nostalgic”. That’s how he likes to describe it. He’s gotten used to life as a skeleton, and though he yearns for skin to be able to hold you correctly, he enjoys what he has with you. It’s the closest he ever gets to feeling alive again, and only you could spring forth such feelings from him. 

He can’t “kiss” persay, but he likes to press his mouth against your forehead- so at least you can get a kiss without him possibly hurting you or making it feel weird!

He loves when you lean against him, so he’ll wrap an arm around then. Also loves when you pepper kisses all over his face, it makes him happy. 

Yes, it’s a bit unconventional, but it’s your unconventional relationship and damn it, he’ll treasure it and fight for it like no tomorrow. 

Extra thought: Brook would make sure to give you an accessory that matches with him, so he can always remember you and be connected with you, even after death. 

Jinbei 

Jinbei is so respectful, so gentlemanly, and so sweet, and you can’t help but feel adored with him. 

Often takes your hand and presses a kiss to it, especially as a greeting or good morning. He likes how your hands compare to his larger ones. 

Again, very respectful and honorable, so he will not force his affection onto you unless you ask. Then when he gets more comfortable, he will begin to ask if he can hug you, kiss you, hold your hand. If you say you don’t mind/he doesn’t need to ask as much, he will take note and make an attempt to “surprise” you with a hug. He does like the look on your face when your eyes widen and the large smile on your lips once he randomly decides to hold your hand. 

Likes to hug you in private, and when he does, he makes sure to wrap you in his arms and stroke your back. It’s so nice, and Jinbei is quite warm, funnily enough. It’s like a very snuggly heater wrapped around you. 

Jinbei, despite being the “adult” in the Straw Hats for the most part, he tends to get super cute and bashful when you kiss him. It’s adorable seeing the slight blush on his face and the goofy grin when he recovers. 

He often jokes that it’s an eye for an eye, so if you kiss him, he must kiss you back, and vice versa. He's all about being equal and treating you with respect while making sure you understand how much he loves you. 

Jinbei doesn’t admit it, but he would adore wearing matching kimonos or outfits with you. He might like to wear contrasting colors but with a similar theme, or just the same pattern and color. It makes him feel closer to you sharing outfits like that. 

[hyunsvngs]

This was definitely inspired by that little glimpse of Hyune's happy trail in a photo where his shirt rode up (and no I haven't thought about it an unhealthy amount shush...) But I'm guessing most of SKZ either shave or wax and I can imagine them being shy about having pubic hair.

Say they let it grow out a bit (either on break or tour) and when you go to touch them they pull back because they haven't shaved, and you have to reassure them that you do not care one bit. I'm specifically thinking of Chan, Hyunjin, Jisung and Felix but it could be any of them honestly.

Imagine sitting behind them and pulling them against you so that they're tucked between your legs with their back to your chest. You wrap your arms around their waist, letting your fingers slip underneath their shirt and trace the soft skin of their stomach. Then you go to dip beneath their waistband and they tense up and grab your hand.

"Baby don't, I haven't shaved."

"Do you honestly think I would be bothered by that?"

You gently coax them to relax, lavishing them with praise and reassurances and eventually they let you. Your fingers brush through the small patch of hair while you press kisses along their jawline and the column of their neck, drawing out soft moans and whimpers.

It wouldn't necessarily have to turn sexual, especially with Chan and Felix. They would just melt into you and adore the intimacy. If you do it while spooning them in bed they might even fall asleep, or get into the habit of shyly asking you to stroke their pubic hair when you're in bed together.

Hyune and Ji would probably get too sensitive and needy after a while and end up pushing your hand onto their cock, but they also enjoy the intimacy -- especially the vulnerability aspect for them.

-😺

ohhh i love hairy skz !! NEED THEM SO BADD. i think with chan and hyunjin it'd be a cute domestic thing, but i think jisung is the horniest dog ever and felix is a bonafide gremlin. jisung's caveman brain would kick in and realise that oh, you like that, and oh- hand near my dick, and he's huffing and puffing and bucking his chubby hard cock into your hand within minutes.

felix would try to be a bit more coy about it i think. felix acting all innocent and pretending his shaft isn't dripping a storm in his boxers.. acting as if he's embarrassed about it, shifting his hips away from you and wiggling and oh! it bumped your hand, darn it. by the time you're pumping his shaft he's doing that sexy little smile of his that he got what he wanted, kissing up the column of your throat.

[lazywriters-blog]

THE DESPERATE HERO

YANDERE IZUKU MIDORIYA

Warning: May contain triggering content, sexual assault, non-consensual touching, creepy and stalkerish behavior, and yandere content.

Summary: She has been a fickle little friend, and her avoidant nature leads up to a disastrous position, and her best friend is the center of it all. Grown into a man, a focused and determined young man that meets with his distant friend who will avoid him at any cost. What shall occur?

"Hey, I stopped by to see you again, are you home?" three taps on the door and her shoulder flinch up, blood-shoot eyes swift to steady on the voice behind the main entrance, menacingly dark and unwelcoming, "I want to talk to you, please don't ignore me." he pleaded, another series of knocks chimed throughout her space and tensed up the peace. Then, it began. The phone calls.

The device illuminated with life in the clutches of her hand, stiff and unrelenting against the soft metal that buzzed silently, she peered down and without a thought, pressed her finger on the power button and brought the screen into darkness. Lifeless and still.

"You don't even pick up your phone, how am I supposed to talk to you? Please just let's sit down and speak, I'm sorry for what I did the night before." he continued, "I wasn't thinking straight." He had leaned closer to the door, kept his hand on the handle, and tried to listen in to her movements she's sure. "You don't have to isolate yourself, there are people who care about you, please let me help you."

The peacekeeper talk had crawled under her skin, the times he uses it to bring about change that would benefit him, and keep her aware of her every wrongdoing. Her bad habit of pushing people out of her life had become a prominent obstacle in his way, and he had his chances.

She knew she should have kept away from him the moment he held her hand, but best friends always do, so she never said anything about it.

She really should have pulled her hand back when he blushed and flashed her a shy smile, gently combing through his green hair and leaving no space between them. She was wrong in not doing anything.

"I... Know you were avoiding me since the time we held hands, you were cutting me out of your life and I didn't want that! I want to be your friend forever, I want to help you, please let me in." his voice held no motive other than to convince her she was the one who was overreacting. Somehow, his kiss was a friendly gesture, and she'd never believe that the innocent izuku had put his lips on hers, he just didn't seem the most courageous. When it came to her, at least.

"That one time, I called out your name, you almost pretended that you didn't hear me and walked into the bathroom, that was mean of you but I'm not mad, I get it, I'm somewhat clingy, and I'll try my best not to be. So, please open the door."

She would rather risk their friendship than feel the immense discomfort of being observed under his gaze, but confrontation seems impossible once she steps out and into the wide big world, he'd find her during his duty and she would have to sprint back home in a sweaty mess. Barely managing to dodge him all while.

Her eyes locked onto the handle and saw it shift, she knew his patience was cracking and she'd be one to piece them back for the sake of harmony.

He never liked her pushing him out of her life. All too many times, that seemed to be the case for her, and to get him off her back she would get to be the peacekeeper.

"Please let me inside your life. I want to be a part of it, even if a little. I want to be by your side."

The hopelessness in his voice made her reconsider, made her sympathetic for a moment, and provoked her to get onto her feet and move toward the only thing blocking him out. The one thing she's hesitant to unseal.

Resting her hand on the wood, she bends to look into the peak hole. Standing near, he's drawing in breath quicker, and the tears pooled in his eyes made her will weaker and the desire to let him in stronger. But she knows better.

"Please, I can't live without you. Let me in..." he inhaled a choked sob, "I love you... I love you so much, it hurts."

"You know, I think you're cool... Cooler than me, at least." she laughed, chugging down her last portion of vanilla tea, and looked at the astonished man with smiling eyes. His freckled cheeks vaguely appeared red before the fluorescent lights, his mug in his hands held tighter while he gulped.

"Thanks, that means a lot coming from you," he replied, fondly staring at his beverage. Before lifting his gaze back up to see her walk into the kitchen, he kept his glass down and suddenly stood up. Followed in her trail and ended up behind her as she was calmly washing her cup.

Izuku didn't know where he found the intrepidity to finally wrap his arms around her waist and rest his chin in the crook of her neck, something he's been wanting to do forever. She didn't seem all that stunned at first, she kept still and slowly turned around to face him. An unanswered question lingered in her head, her eyes questioning his abrupt change.

"I love you... so much..." he starts, staring into her and steadying his grip, the distance between them was little and he's never felt his heart racing so fast, he forgets what he set out to complete.

"I figured that much." she giggled but it wasn't her usual teasing one, this one had a sad tone, "I knew this was coming and I still wasn't prepared for it." she carried on, "I'm not ready to commit to a relationship, I'm far too avoidant for it. Plus, I'll only hurt you and that's what I've done so far so, I'm sorry to deny your feelings but, I can't do it."

She gently attempts to shake him off, but he doesn't let her and quickly stumbles to give a reason, "No! no, you are not, you've never hurt me and you and I know each other better than anyone else, I want to be a part of your life so please don't push me out after so long. We can try, can't we?" He brings her back close, sealing the gap so much so their nose touches.

"I know you better and no matter how much you try to cut me out, I'll keep coming back for you, I love you that much. I can't imagine being without you."

"No, we both know it's only going to hurt us so let's not get ahead of ourselves and stop, you have a life better worth spending on someone else, you know it, so let me go izuku," she argued and forcibly made her way out of his embrace.

"I want to spend it with you!!" he yells, in a frenzy corners her into a kitchen counter and the electronics fall out of place while the clean cup she had set down drops to the floor and into a handful of chunks. She looks at him and she's taken aback by the strength he used on her, laid down in an awkward position she whimpers and pushes her hand against his chest.

"I don't want to." she hisses, catching the man off-guard as he goes quiet with the realization. Hurt displayed in his leafy green eyes, she knew she hit a nerve.

"You can't cut me out of your life again, I won't let you..." it was sudden and raw, anger twisting his features into a person she's rarely seen, and the kiss had barely registered in her mind while she contemplates the unexpected change in the tides.

His scarred hand lowered down to her hip, while her futile attempts at throwing him off her seemed impossible. Suffocated by the kiss, she squirms in misery feeling his lips press down on hers and his body radiating heat that made it so much more unbearable.

She snakes her hand to claw into his arm but it didn't induce an expected reaction of pain, instead, he moaned, and took it as a sign to continue.

Certain the moment he leans back and disconnects their kiss, she'll scream.

He didn't want that.

Cupping her face, he muffles whatever struggling noise she makes, he sadly stares down at her face and gives her a reassuring smile, his right hand moving down to her warm spot, before slowly feeling her long skirt, and revealing the color of her panties.

"I promise I'll take care of you..." he whispers, snuggling closer to her body heat and caging her underneath him.

He seemed to blush with glee, while he unbuttons her green shirt and fests his eyes on the black bra perfectly fitting her chest, he slightly trembles as he traces his hand against her collarbone. His ear redden, and his stiff muscle loosened.

He chuckles, tears gathered in his eyes while he slopes his head down, "I love you... I love you so much, it almost hurts." he mutters against her skin, then looked up at her. "I want to be someone special to you."

"I just want you..."

The doorbell rings, piercing the stagnant air as izuku quickly drags his attention to the unwanted visitor, his hold on her face grew tight. This was her chance, but her silenced words could only be heard by izuku.

"Pizza delivery." shouted a monotone voice.

"Hello, ma'am?" he repeated four knocks. "I'll leave the pizza by the porch." he finished once no response came from anyone, and soon, she was left alone with him.

But the slight deviation was what she needed.

Grabbing the steel pencil holder, she banged it on his head and used her leg to give him one final shove to get him off her, immediately after making a mad dash to her room and closing the door in time. Not stopping there, she ran to her bathroom and locked herself in for what seemed like a day before he decided to leave.

Not after slamming into the door once or twice.

She remembers coming out of there, scared inside her own house while she checks every room and every hidden place to see if he had truly left, she locked herself in her house and hasn't decided to leave until he showed up again.

If he wanted to, he could burst through the door and get to her. But for however long it takes, she will not let him enter her life again.

[thelaughtercafe]

BEN Drowned, Jeff the Killer, Homicidal Liu, and Doctor Locklear finding out their victim has a tickle kink

Tea Type: Rose Boba

Potential Triggers: Dubious consent (for tickling only) in BEN’s, and Jeff’s- Liu and Locklear are established relationships so it’s different.

Suggestive speaking of tickling especially in BEN's and Liu's and similar suggestiveness surrounding fear/enjoying being scared in BEN's.

For Liu's there's threatening and violence, though what's directed at Reader is not from Liu or Sully.

There is a graphically worded description of violence involving eyes though, towards the perpetrator though it's not dwelled on too long and the intensity of the injury isn't described, just implied.

Pairing: BEN/F! Reader, Jeff/F! Reader, Liu/Sully/F! Reader, Locklear/F! Reader

Length: 6.8k+

Summary: The Creeps find out something interesting about their intended victim and decide maybe keeping them around isn't such a bad idea.

A/N: So looking back this is much longer than I realized. Especially BEN and Liu's! They're my faves, tied for number one so I suppose I went overboard haha. HABIT from EverymanHYBRID is right up there though in second place. I already continued the self-indulgent BEN lead in, while including HABIT and Liu in the mix so we'll see if I post it. If you guys have any interest, let me know and I'll post it if enough people want to see it!

Also, please let me know if you want any additional triggers added; I think I got them all, but just in case!

BEN Drowned:

BEN was nothing if not meticulous when learning all he could about his victims. While typically he liked to do all his research at the start, he felt like a change of pace with you, doing it in the moment could be more fun and perhaps frighten you even more as he could go by your most recent searches and documents. That never failed to add an extra edge of panic.

It was inevitable he would find your dirty little secret; especially in a document with no password and nothing to guard it save the word twordish. 

“Foolish girl…” 

He took in the information easily, and couldn’t help the sadistic smirk that lit up his face, fingers twitching with sparks. 

“Not as innocent as you seem after all, huh?”

That good girl image you held was what initially drew him to you as prey but clearly…there was a side to yourself you hid from him. From everyone, in fact.  

A part of you liked being scared, and therefore what he was doing to you. Memories hit him then. The blush that would frequently appear on your cheeks, eyes darting to the side, half sighs and even the occasional clenched thighs all made sense now when put together. 

You’d recently decided to ditch your technology in an attempt to get rid of him, hence why he was looking for something to draw you back. Appearing in reality and making you frightened of things that aroused you, only to then turn that fear itself into arousal again made him ravenous. 

It’d been so long since he’d had a victim perfectly suited to his love of fucking with their minds. He couldn’t wait to have you screaming underneath him, the fear that would fill your eyes, the tears…

He bit back a moan and sighed in much the way you had. 

Oh, he couldn’t wait. 

—–

That boy was definitely stealing glances at you.  You were sure of it now. 

You were at the library again, comfortable in your reading corner in a secluded room when a boy walked in. He wore jean shorts, black converse, a dark green hoodie and a matching beanie on a cursory glance. 

You assumed he’d entered to look for a book in here and that he’d leave soon and returned your eyes to the book in your hands. 

You flinched a little in surprise as he suddenly spoke, making you look up again. 

“Mind if I sit here?”

His voice sounded older than you expected, in his 20’s for sure despite his shorter stature, but there was still a quality to his voice that called you back to childhood, an underlying playfulness. 

It…made you uneasy rather than comforted for some reason though and you felt dread in you that wasn’t there before. Hmph. You’d just be a little more vigilant.

Still, you smiled and nodded, as you would for anyone else and he smiled back, before taking a seat and starting to scroll through his phone. 

Your smile instantly dropped and you trembled a moment as memories assaulted you of that thing that’d been messing with you from every screen available. Another reason you picked this room. It was far away from the computer room and the only screen in the adjacent room was facing away, towards the library clerk. 

Using your phone for contact was unavoidable, but you’d had it on airplane mode for ages now, only taking it off to check email and communication once a week before putting it right back on. Given you were putting yourself through college which was currently in the off season of Summer while you worked to pay tuition meant you only had one person to keep in touch with, your Mom. 

The rest of the time when you weren’t working was spent here, in safety and solitude. Luckily, the boy’s screen was facing away, but you moved an extra seat away just for comfort’s sake before letting out a shaky breath and returning to your book. 

It took a few minutes but eventually you fully relaxed again. Until the back of your neck prickled anyway. You risked a discreet glance up, and caught the boys’ rushing back to his screen. Once was a mistake. Twice, perhaps a coincidence. Thrice, maybe he was checking you out? But four times? Now you were full on anxious. The dread since he’d initially spoken to you was now a solid, immovable pit in your stomach. 

You were debating how best to leave discreetly while pretending to read when he cleared his throat, much closer than you would like. You stood instinctively but he continued walking over until he was in front of you and smiled amicably. He seemed nice enough but why was your body screaming at you to run? Your gut typically wasn’t off…but it had told you to download that damned file in the first place so maybe you were just wrong. 

You smiled back, just as innocently, tilting your head to the side. 

“Everything okay?”

“Yeah. Just fine. I know this might be somewhat forward, but any chance you want to get some hot chocolate with me?”

That made you giggle. 

“Hot chocolate huh? How old are you again?”

You found the tease coming easy to you and relaxed. So it really was just interest. Hm. In all honesty, he was your type.  He was quite a bit taller than you despite being around average height, and his blue eyes were quite hypnotizing. His blond locks were messy but in that cute, wind tousled way and he had this roguish charm that was mischievous. You’d always been drawn to things she shouldn’t be. He was no different. 

He pulled an offended face at your question. 

“Who doesn’t like hot chocolate? Are you coming with me to the cafe or not smartass?”

He quipped, turning on his heel and walking towards the door. 

You hesitated a beat and then you let yourself smile, following after. 

“Yeah yeah, I’m comin’.”

—–

The walk to the cafe was comfortable and you found your earlier fears assuaged. 

He made conversation easily; you’d asked what he was doing on his phone and he’d said he was using an emulator to play Zelda. You had fond memories of the series and found he did as well, leading to a lighthearted debate over if Twilight Princess or Majoras Mask was better. 

The cafe was just as peaceful, with you both getting hot chocolate. It was summer, but you found you didn’t mind as he pushed you aside with his shoulder to pay for both of you.  It didn’t take much to make you swoon, and he was well on his way at this rate. Respect was hard to find these days and he was being such a sweetheart. He was funny too and you seemed to have common interests. What was there not to like? 

He motioned to the book beside you as you sipped your drink. 

“So you like Becca Fitzpatrick? Can’t say I’ve heard of her. The cover is interesting though.”

“Yeah! I’m a lover of supernatural romances. Even guilty pleasure stuff like this…probably not the most healthy relationship. It’s about a fallen angel and a Human who fall in love, but Patch at the start; he uses his powers to mess with her pretty often.”

He casually sipped his drink before tilting his head. 

“What kind of powers?”

“So far? Talking directly in her head, taunting her about intimate knowledge he shouldn’t have about her and her life, and messing with her memories. Making her think she’s crazy. He kind of almost killed her once already, but changed his mind last minute. It’s…toxic logically but as guilty pleasure fuel it’s hot. I guess. I dunno. I try not to think about it too much." 

You laughed sheepishly, embarrassed about rambling and about such a weird ass topic only to hear him laugh. 

"We all have our kinks right? I’d love to see your full collection back at your place. Think we could swing by if it’s close?”

You nodded at that, moving to throw out your now empty cups as you headed out with him following after. 

“Yeah sure. It’s mostly supernatural romance though but I do have some video game art books you might like that I can lend you, long as you promise to take good care of them. I’ve got a really big game collection too." 

Oops that slipped out. You didn’t want to tell him about your weird issues with tech. Not when things were going so well. Too late now though. His eyes had lit up as he asked excitedly. 

"Oh cool, really? What’s your favorite?”

“The World Ends With You. It’s kind of indie but-”

“The one with Neku right? I love that game too! Most people don’t know about it!" 

Your eyes lit up despite yourself. Maybe it wouldn’t be too bad. As long as you were just talking about them and not playing them it should be fine. 

The walk from the cafe to your house was short so the distraction was nice. You were half tuned in to the conversation half dreading his reaction when you headed inside. 

“Alright here we are.”

You led the way inside, unlocking the door and headed to your room with him in tow. He closed the door behind him and looked around in awe. 

"Woah. You’re definitely a gamer.”

Given you had a ps4, a Nintendo switch and a ps3 all underneath your TV at once you saw why he thought that. But then his brow furrowed and you braced yourself.  

“Why is everything unplugged though? Even the tv looks dead." 

A glance over at your laptop on the desk, very intentionally unplugged from the charger. 

"Laptop too.”

Your smile was tight and anxious and you felt shaky. 

“I-um-”

He smiled amicably as he turned back to face you.   

“Don’t tell me you’re doing some tech detox! Those things don’t actually help you know; you’ll just get more addicted when you return to it later.”

He joked, and you felt like you could breathe again, laughing to hide your anxiety.  

“Y-Yeah how’d you know?”

Just as you were about to confirm his claim a loud, and most importantly familiar beep rang out and you panicked, breathing already getting harder as you searched frantically for the source. 

“That’s impossible.”

“What’s impossible? Hey, are you ok? You’re awfully pale and jumpy all of a sudden.”

He touched your arm lightly and your gaze moved to him. That’s right!

“I-um-God. I have a confession to make but first can you please turn off your phone?”

You knew it sounded crazy, even to you, but you couldn’t risk it. You’d happily have gone along with the tech detox excuse but…but you couldn’t risk giving it an in again. Better to be safe and tell an outsider in a tech free environment. 

“My phone? Uh…why though?”

“I promise I’ll explain but we’re not safe until-ugh I sound like a lunatic." 

You hid your face in your hands for a moment, cheeks burning in humiliation and panic. 

"You can leave if this is too weird. I know I’m not making much sense but I just-there’s a very important reason I can’t be near tech.”

A hesitant peek up and the boy was taking you in with such sweet worry…and then he sighed in defeat. 

“…Fine. If it’ll really make you feel better and you’ll explain.”

He looked at his phone and then pocketed it after holding down the power button and turning it off. His gaze returned to you, expectantly. 

“There. Now what’s got you so panicked? You love video games, that much is obvious. So why would you unplug everything like this?”

You still trembled. The fear lingered, along with hope. Finally, someone you could confide in. 

“I’m-again this is gonna sound crazy but…”

A broken laugh escaped you.  

“I have nothing else to lose, I guess. I’ve got some kind of awful…thing watching me. 

His face screwed up at the very thought like he was offended. 

"A thing? What, like some kinda hacker?”

You hummed, moving to sit down on your bed and fiddled with your fingers. 

“Yeah. Kind of. But it’s more than that. See, if it was on one computer and my phone, that’d make sense. It’s what I thought at first. The calling me by name, the popups to scare me and chat with me where even more personal details were revealed…all that could be a hacker.”

You clenched and unclenched your hands as you swallowed nervously. 

“But that wasn’t where it ended. It followed me. Any screen in my line of sight it’d taunt me. Send me pictures of myself. Display messages making fun of me for trying to escape. Even then. I thought…maybe just a really good hacker right?”

You risked a glance at him, and he looked down at you nodding encouragingly. 

“Yeah. I could see it being some black hat who just…saw you as an easy target and wanted to really fuck with you.  But something tells me there’s more.”

You smirked bitterly. 

“…it knew things it shouldn’t. Like; things I’d never said aloud or confessed online; so no mic work or camera or internet involved.”

“That’s impossible. Maybe you did and just don’t remember?’

You shook your head. 

"I mean…Gods I swear I head it in my head once.”

“Like Patch?”

“Yeah actually exactly like-”

“Like this maybe?”

You couldn’t help it. You yelped, and jerked looking around in fear, tears instinctively filling your eyes. You’d know that glitched, demonic in its deepness tone anywhere. It haunted your nightmares. 

He looked at you worriedly, grounding you again with a hand on your shoulder. 

"Hey, come back to me! You good?”

He frowned seriously as your eyes refocused on him  and you sniffled comforted by the kindness in his blue eyes. 

“It just did it. It-it-I just- I don’t know why this demon is doing this to me.”

That was what did it. You looking up at him, teary eyed and desperate, thinking he was your knight in shining armor when really he was the monster in your closet all along. 

He caressed your face softly, cupping your cheek so he could see every micro-expression and then he grinned. 

“Because it’s fun. Why else?”

His tone was so sweetly gentle that it took you a moment for the actual words meaning to click and when they did you shivered. 

“Tha-That’s not funny. I’m not playing around.”

He pulled back to swagger around the room, the same and yet completely different all at once, as he hummed. 

“Hmm… shame. Feels like a game to me and a fun one at that. Y'know, I never did tell you my name, and luckily your cute romantic naivete ensured you went with it when I told you they didn’t define us. Why don’t you ask me again now that I’m ready to answer you?”

You shook your head, eyes flicking to the door as you tried to hold yourself together. This couldn’t be happening. It couldn’t. 

“No.”

You stood and despite expecting to be stopped you made it to the door. Exhilaration and adrenaline fueled you and as you went to open the door-

“Ouch!”

You jerked away as you were violently shocked the second your hand made contact with the doorknob. Your mind raced. When had you closed the door?

“You didn’t.”

You flinched and reluctantly turned to face your captor trying to put on a brave face as he smirked and cornered you against the door, hovering over you with his hands on either side of your trembling frame. 

His entire demeanor had shifted on a dime. The sweet kind boy from earlier may as well never have existed.  This person in front of you- no this monster looked all too amused at your fearful denial.  But there was eagerness in his eyes too. More passionate than any he’s shown when engaging in your conversations before. 

“You’re so easy to predict. I charged the doorknob when I closed it; did you like my little mind trick earlier too? Heh " 

He snickered. 

"The only way you’re getting out is if I open the door first. Now then…”

He tilted his head condescendingly, blue eyes seeming to spark with the demand.

“Say it. I know you want to know.”

You weakly shook your head and flinched again as he hissed at you, raising his voice a little and drawing closer to your face. 

“Do it!”

“Fine! W-What are you?”

He pulled back to snicker, calm as if he wasn’t making you a frightened mess. 

“Tsk tsk, what a different question than who but I suppose I’ll answer both since I’m feeling gracious.”

He met your eyes and you whimpered as he grabbed your chin, forcing you to maintain eye contact. 

“My name is BEN. But you already knew that little mouse didn’t you~?”

His voice was a coo and your cheeks heated despite yourself even as you were filled with icy fear at the confirmation. He even used that stupid nickname that always flustered you. No-one else would know that. You ached with the want to look away but he was way too strong. Pushing at his chest did nothing but make him throw his head back in light laughter. 

“Ahahaha! Aww that’s adorable. Don’t make me pin your arms down darling, we were getting along so well earlier. Now! As for your other question. I suppose there is many things you could consider me. A virus, a lost soul, a villain, technically I used to be Human and those fools who know of me online call me legend, a Creepypasta but now, knowing what name you’d give me is what I’ll go by I think. What was it you called me? A demon? I can roll with that." 

Your breath hitched as he leaned down cooing lovingly in your ear. 

"After all you like demons, don’t you cutie? You can be my Nora and I’ll be your Patch. " 

You scoffed and he growled low, demoni- cruel, and glitchy. 

Yet you were so scared, so wound up over months of torment and anxiety that you just broke. Constantly being on edge and paranoid. Now you have a direct source to vent your frustrations.  Of course it’d bubble over.

“Get off me you psychopath!!”

You raised your voice, something exceedingly out of character and pushed him back harshly, right into the corner of your desk, making him wince. A brief flash of surprise filled his face and then he was snarling, and advancing on you.  

Luckily, you’d already used his shock to turn on your heel and go for the doorknob again and this time we’re successful. You crossed the threshold when a deceptively weak looking arm pulled you back as you struggled and tried to elbow him while his other arm held you to him with another arm resting casually against your shoulders by your neck. 

"No!" 

All pretense was lost  and he laughed openly against the side of your neck, relishing your squirming as he easily kept you in check.

“You actually caught me off guard. Guess seeing me in the flesh is a little intense huh? Even made a weak little thing like you go for fight just for an opportunity of flight. I suppose now is as good a time to mention as any.” 

His mouth moved to your ear where he whispered. 

“I know your secret~”

You frowned, wracking your brain for anything else he could use as ammo but came up empty so you called his bluff. 

“Oh yeah? Like what?”

And then his fingers squeezed at your waist and you squealed and jerked in his grip and it clicked what he meant. But before you could voice it, he spoke up. 

“Like this. Who’d have guessed a seemingly innocent girl like you would have a goldmine of kinks and scenarios for me to play with you with just waiting to be exploited.”

You shook a little, but this time the trembling wasn’t from fear alone, it was withheld arousal too, especially as you could swear his teeth, his fairly sharp teeth- grazed your ear and made you jerk, followed by his hiss in your ear. 

“Guess you really are a tickle slut. You like fear too which is just perfect for me.”

Your voice was admittedly breathless as you stopped struggling, simply holding his other arm, positioned around your neck. 

“What-What are you going to do with me?”

“I’m going to make you mine of course. I like you, so I’ve decided I want to keep you. I think you’ll find the arrangement to your liking, once you get used to the other inhabitants anyway. I’ll introduce you more intimately. I know you can get anxious in big groups so after your initial intro to everyone it’ll be smaller groups. And in our free time…” 

You quickly descended into giggles as the hand at your waist spidered up and down your whole left side, making you squirm and blush. You were distracted so you squealed as his tongue brushed your ear, making you shudder in lust before a hesitant moan left your lips at the cruel and exhilarating words that left his lips. With no need to maintain a facade, his voice deepened and sounded twisted, glitching as he purred. 

“I’ll take my time breaking you.”

Jeff the Killer:

Jeff would already be faltering. You’d been bullied for many a year by now. Of course, the bullies had already been disposed of, but Jeff was triggered heavily by the weakness he saw in you. He feels an odd sense of ownership. 

When you flinch in your sleep and giggle, Jeff frowns in confusion from where he had been watching you while he grappled with his thoughts. 

You mumble in your sleep, and his eyes move to your hands as you seem to try and push someone away before slapping the air, a grin and evident blush on your face as you squirm. 

"Mike s-stop- quit ihihihit!! Damn it no! Not thehehere!”

Jeff experiences a brief flash that has him stumbling back a step and swallowing hard. 

A much younger him, Liu, shrieking in laughter under his wiggling fingertips. 

Right. Tickling. 

Is there a weakness you don’t have? 

He frowns in discomfort and quickly moves to dig into your sides, covering your mouth with his free hand to muffle your squeal of laughter. 

As you struggle underneath him, Jeff glares as you eye him in fearful shock between gasps of forced mirth. 

“Gods, you’re so pathetic. Yet another weakness I’ll have to train you to cope with.”

Right. Training. You could serve as a good partner if he worked you hard enough. 

His voice is gruff, and he only pulls his hand away when you’re out of breath not moving from where he’s straddling your waist. 

“Who…f-fhuhuhuck me- who the Hehehell are you?”

Jeff snickers immaturely at your word choice before he smirks. 

“The man who saved you from those pricks sweetheart. Means you owe me and I’ll be takin’ you under my wing. You either come willingly or…”

He twirls his knife with practiced skills and watches you take in his offer, smirking with intent. 

“I’ll take ya by force and tickle you more in front of all my friends, soon as we’re home.”

Homicidal Liu:

You’d always liked Liu. He was sweet, attentive, attractive; truly the whole package.  You’d been getting closer to Liu for a few months now and despite Liu warning you that he had an alternate personality you hadn’t met you’d accepted him with open arms. At least now you knew why he’d been procrastinating on answering your request to date. 

He’d looked so shocked as you threw your arms around him.  

“You really don’t mind? Sully isn’t- he’s the opposite of how I normally am. He’s not exactly…palatable to most. He can be quite intense.”

You raised your chin confidently at that and smirked slightly. 

“Well I’ve dealt with you when you’re being particularly needy- I think I’ll be okay. Besides; he’s a part of you.  I’m sure I’ll come to love him too!”

Your confident declaration suddenly fell apart as you scrambled for the right words, going red. 

“Ah-well I mean- if he would be okay with that obviously!! I’d never-”

Liu cut you off with a laugh and tugged you into his chest, lovingly nuzzling the top of your head as you mumbled defeatedly into his chest. 

“I’m not very good at this huh? Sorry.”

Liu shuddered suddenly, a full body shake that made you pull back to look at him in worry. He firmly turned his face away from you, avoiding your concerned gaze before he was ready and clearing his throat as the tremors faded. He sighed in relief and smiled gently at you.  

“Sorry about that love. Didn’t mean to make you worried. It seems Sully is a little too eager. I don’t want you meeting until we’ve been dating a while first. I…well.”

He looked nervous before his blue eyes bore into yours. 

“Admittedly I want you all to myself. You fell for me first, not him. Can’t have him stealing my girl, even if he is a part of me.”

You couldn’t hold back your quickly growing smile if you tried. 

“So that’s a yes? Thank you thank you thank you!”

You laughed, giddy as you hugged him so tight your new boyfriend nearly spun. 

—–

It happened a month in, rather unexpectedly. 

Liu had come to pick you up from work at the movie theater as per your usual schedule. Your coworkers already were familiar with him from your past months getting to know each other and he waved amicably to anyone he saw, chatting a few moments as he waited for you to emerge from where you’d gone to put out the garbage for the night. When you didn’t return after several minutes, his brow furrowed in worry. 

He told your coworkers he was going to check in on you and they waved him off, distracted by their own closing duties. It was late, dark out and already, Liu was feeling anxious. He’d never liked the dark. Not after that night. He rounded the corner where the dumpster and hopefully you awaited and locked on a situation he never thought he’d see again. 

Someone he loved, with a knife to her throat. 

No-one would be taken from him again. 

You meanwhile, were petrified. Tears swam in your eyes that you refused to let fall as the man currently holding you captive against him hissed into your ear. 

“Here’s the plan sweetheart, you’re gonna lead the way inside with me and we’re gonna go right over to the cash registers. Take out every bit inside and bring it all out back here. All your little coworkers, the ones that are left anyway? They’ll be too scared ‘a me cutting this pretty neck of yours to do anything stupid.”

A deep voice you’d never heard before emerged, quickly followed by the love of your life. Liu had come for you! 

“That’s my pretty neck actually, and if you know what’s good for you, you’ll let her go before I really get angry.”

Wait…no.

Green eyes, similar but distinctly different to Liu’s blue glared into the man. 

A knife being tossed casually as a children’s toy as he flipped it effortlessly between his fingers when you knew well Liu let you do the cooking because of his phobia and it clicked. 

“S-Sully-”

His eyes cut to you, sharp and biting for an instant before the man behind you laughed. 

“Oh you know each other, do you? Lovebirds. How sweet.”

Your breath caught as the knife pressed in enough to make a line of blood trickle down the column of your throat. Your tears fell too, unable to keep them at bay as you bit your lip to stifle the sobs. Like Hell were you giving him that much. But still. 

“But now ain’t the time to play hero kid. All the lass has to do is cooperate and she’ll be just fine. Once I get my just rewards I’m out of here and you can both be reunited at last.”

Sully appraised the situation, eyes still locked on you a moment more before that piercing gaze moved to your captor. He tilted his head with a strange smile on his lips before he hummed. 

“Who’s playing hero? We both want something. I’ll help you get your money, you give me my girl. Seems a simple enough trade to me. How much were you thinking? 100? 1000?”

Sully threw his knife casually to the side as if it was trash and instead easily instead slipped out his wallet, beginning to flip through bills as both you and the captor were bewildered. 

“Shit!”

Sully cursed as he dropped the stack of bills, rushing to pick them up, looking nervous and while the expression and clumsiness reminded you of Liu a moment you knew better. Liu scolded you for cursing when it slipped out. Huh. Seems you had a lot to learn about Sully. 

He approached once he’d gathered all the bills and though the man tensed a bit his grip was loose. You were tempted to fight but you had a feeling…saw something in Sully’s eyes that told you to wait as he shot you a quick look. 

“Is this enough?”

He held out one hand, filled with 100’s, hunched in submission with his head lowered and when the man couldn’t help himself and bent over your shoulder to look closer, slightly removing the knife a few inches from your neck Sully struck. 

He lunged, his free hand holding the man’s head down forcibly; using your shoulder as leverage to better press his neck down and then instantaneously letting the money scatter as he reached his hand in his pocket a moment only to ruthlessly shove it straight into the man’s eye. Somehow, he was still alive. Screaming but alive and when Sully reared back his hand to finish the job, the man having dropped the knife in his agony and fallen on his ass, you shook off your shock to rush him and nearly topple him over in a bone crushing hug. 

“Oof! What are you-he’ll get away!”

He hissed, trying to tug you off him but you didn’t budge, holding him tighter. 

“L-Liu wouldn’t want this. I don’t either. What you did was enough please Sully, you already took his sight- he’s crippled and not going anywhere and I’m safe. Isn’t that enough?”

“No. For me it’s not. He was going to kill you. Ready, willing and able to rob you of your life…why should I not do the same to him?”

Your reply was simple and you pulled back to look into his eyes. They didn’t hold the same softness Liu tended to, instead expectant and frustrated.

“Because that’s too good for him. Think about it. He was going to make Liu be alone the rest of his life. Murder me in front of him. In front of you.  Leave you a lifetime of Hell. Let him learn to live with a disability in a prison cell.”

He stared you down a moment and just as nervousness bubbled in your gut he pulled you in for a bruising kiss. You heard the crying behind you peak as one of Sully’s hands left you and jerked in his grip to try and see. He didn’t let you even as he broke the kiss. When you frowned disapprovingly at him he smirked, slow and measured. 

“Well now. I think you and I will get along just fine. Don’t look so cross. ”

His smile widened, eyes alight with enough glee to make you shiver. His voice dropped just as it had when he’d first appeared, sounding almost demonic in comparison to Liu’s lilting intonation. 

“He dared to not only take what is mine, but also had the gall to steal a sight for my eyes alone. You, vulnerable, with tears in your eyes. It’s only fair he lost his.”

A thought hits you suddenly and you can’t resist asking it. 

“…You planned this from the second you came out of those shadows didn’t you?”

Sully smiles mysteriously before he sighs. 

“It seems our time is running out. Ah, yes. Liu apologizes in advance for this, by the way.”

And just like that; Sully passed out, all of his weight going on you and nearly sending you tumbling to the ground. Luckily Liu recovered fast and blinked several times as he reoriented, looking around before hugging you tightly. 

From there, the man now passed out from the pain was arrested and everyone vouched for Liu along with you, claiming it must’ve been self defense because he was such a gentle, nonviolent and calm guy. 

Liu was ecstatic once the hectic night was over and you finally made it home, a little after daybreak. 

“I can’t believe it!! Sully loves you!!! I knew he would!”

He peppered kisses all over your face, making you giggle and blush.

“I’m gonna have nightmares for weeks, but I confess I’m so glad I finally got to meet him. He’s so different to you, but he’s also my type. As if one of you wasn’t bad enough for my heart and libido both.”

“What was that?”

You stiffened as you realized the last thing you’d said and swallowed nervously. You hadn’t talked sex things yet but with Sully riling you up earlier it just popped out. 

“Forget I said anything it really doesn’t-”

 Liu made you turn to face him on the bed and you gasped as you saw one of his eyes was green, and the other blue. 

“You really want to go there? You’re positive?”

You nodded shyly at Liu and jumped a little as Sully spoke up after a moment, all casual nonchalance. 

“So does this mean we can finally make you come undone with tickling like you so desperately want us too?" 

You gaped at him before moving to scramble out of the bed in your haste to get away, a nervous grin on already at the edges of your lips. 

"H-How did you-”

Sully barked out a mocking laugh. 

“Oh sweetheart you really are too trusting. I’ll have to teach you to delete your search history once you’re done on our laptop. You panicked and had a blush on your cheeks, slammed our laptop closed when we came home from work one day. Liu said to trust you but I confess I was curious and snuck a peek.”

His grin widened and his voice dropped to a husky purr as he stood, cornering you against the wall before cooing into your ear.

“Imagine our surprise when we saw what a naughty little slut you were being~” 

“S-Sullly, Liu I-”

At your anxiety, Liu was already smiling and cradling your face, pecking your lips and you sighed, somewhat soothed. 

“Don’t be scared baby. We love you, both of us.”

Sully agreed, voice more mature than you’d expect. 

“Every part of you; including the cute kinky side.”

“I-It’s not cute…” 

You grumbled a little, bright red and the sound of their laughter mixing into one was so beautiful you just had to raise your head to savor it. His expression was even better, and with the green and blue eye he sported, the pure joy on his face, you only blushed darker. 

“Sorry love. Anyone who says they’re not cute, is adorable. Them’s the breaks.”

Liu cooed affectionately, hugging you and nuzzling the top of your head. 

Sully chimed in after a few moment’s peace.

“So; what’s the deal Liu? Take turns tickling in 5 minutes increments to see who can make her either cry uncle or moan first?” 

The smirk he shot your way was wolfish but the way your thighs clenched had Liu smirking too, albeit in a kinder way. He was older than you after all and given he was your first everything, along with Sully, he wanted to treasure every second. 

“Deal. If I win I get a whole day with her alone.”

“Ditto for me. Better pray cause your weak ass technique-”

But Liu didn’t need his mouth to tickle and you soon found yourself laughing  as he dug right into your hipbones without a trace of the mercy that was so characteristic of him.

You heard Sully scoff before reluctantly giving Liu total control but you didn’t really care who won. 

All you knew was that you were incredibly lucky, had two stunning men to keep you safe when you were in danger, and one thing for absolutely certain. 

There would be many more laughs in your future.

Dr. Locklear:

You pace nervously, awaiting Locklear and chewing anxiously on your nails. 

He was late. Ever since that hang up saying “a situation had arisen” you’d been anxious. You knew you shouldn’t care. You should be glad, especially since you weren’t 100% sure if the victim he chose was really guilty without a doubt but-

You found you trusted him more. 

Gods, what had he turned you into? Tears burned your eyes and you sniffled at the thought of losing him, rubbing at your eyes angrily. 

Your door opened with a 'BANG!’ and the man of the hour waltzed in, flowers in hand which quickly dropped along with his smile as he saw your state. 

“I’m fi-”

Yet he was already pulling down your hands from your face and gently wiping the remaining wetness himself, crystal blue eyes taking you in with worry. 

“Who made you cry? It’s been mere hours since we last spoke who could have-”

“No-one that matters. I’m fine.”

You were dismissive as you could manage but he wasn’t having it, seeing through your half truths and bluffs as always and cutting to the heart of the matter. 

“So me, then. Explain.”

His eyes and expression were both serious as he guided you to the couch. 

You frowned and turned your face away, going silent. 

His tone turned playful in response and out of the corner of your eye you saw his own hold a glimmer of playfulness, returning to his old self now that he knew you were unharmed. 

“Ah, the silent treatment, hm? How am I ever to cope with such a thing?”

His voice was teasing and you fought a blush back with difficulty as you 'hmph’d’.

He made a show of tapping his sculpted chin before his eyes darted over to yours and you quickly looked away fully, not wanting him to know you’d been peeking. 

Of course, that was what he wanted, if his enticing chuckle was anything to go by. 

His arms wrapped around you, pulling you against his chest, between his legs as he nuzzled into your neck. 

“C'mon love of mine~ I can’t make it better if you don’t talk and I’d just hate having to make you.”

He sounded so gleeful. Stupid sadist. So much for fighting your blush. You were sure it was crawling to your ears by now-

“Oh? What have we here? Seems the blood has risen to your ears. How adorable. You must be really embarrassed for that to happen~”

His lips against your ear so incessantly had left you squirming a little in his grip as you fought back a smile, swallowing the urge to giggle. 

“If you’d like me to stop, all you need do is talk my dear.”

You were tense as a spring, barely holding yourself together as he cooed, blew air and teased your neck and ears. 

“Of course…I feel a trade off is in order as well. I made you cry so making you laugh feels like a fair retribution to me. Don’t you think?”

He began squeezing at your sides and exploring your torso and you were gone, trying desperately to curl up and hide your snickers and squeaks as he messed with you. 

“You’re such a jehehehehrk! You k-knew what you were-nohohoho!!”

You whined, throwing your head back against his shoulder in mirth as he spidered his fingers ticklishly up your back. 

“Of course I did sweetling. Intelligence aside for a moment, I’m a doctor. I touch people’s bodies and elicit all manner of reactions. Do you know how many people I’ve had to restrain so I can work properly due to over ticklishness? Too many. Now then, enough distracting. Unless of course…”

His nimble fingers picked up speed and danced their way into your underarms and ribs until you were kicking helplessly and laughing openly.

“You’d also like to see how mean I can really be.”

“Fuck yhohohohou!!”

He tsked despite the smirk on his face and shrugged nonchalantly. 

“What a naughty brat you are. Such vulgarity too. I’ll have to add a punishment to your care plan~ Fine then. Don’t say I didn’t warn you though, sweet. I’ll just have to replace those initial tears of fear with tears of laughter. Tickle tickle tickle~”

[scribbled-anecdotes]

Kill the Mood - MDZS Slasher AU

Did anyone else read MDZS and think woah you know what this campy, murder-filled series needs: an AU set in a '80s campy teen Slasher? Because I did!

Synopsis:

Meng Yao is in the final year of high school. Between his shitty parents, his shitty after-school job, and his shitty social life, graduation cannot come quick enough. With stressful university admissions and a long-held crush on one of the most popular guys in school, Meng Yao couldn't imagine things could get any more chaotic. That is until he comes home to find he has another half-brother, Xue Yang, who seems a bit ... off. Things quickly spiral when Meng Yao realizes that he might have more in common with this new-found half-brother, who might just be a teen serial killer.

Relationships: XiYao; established Xuanli and in future chapters: SongXiao, Wangxian (background), and XiaoXue (if you see things from Xue Yang's point of view, that is)

CW: canon-typical abuse, suicide mention, mild gore and child death.

Also shoutout to the darling @prinzsorgenfrei for not only aiding and abetting this by beta reading it and drawing very pretty character designs, but for also workshopping scenes with me and for co-writing some XiYao.

This is my first MDZS fic, so please do let me know y'all's thoughts.

New York, 1986

“Jesus Christ.”

A pair of firefighters scanned flashlights over the charred remains of what had once been a nursery: rows of cribs and toddler cots reduced to pyres. Little bodies, burned beyond recognition, curled up.

At least they had been asleep.

There was always something particularly horrid when such innocent lives were caught up in accidents like these. Faulty wiring in the old boys’ group home was the immediate suspect. The fire had started in the basement, where wires that hadn’t been updated since before the war knotted and choked each other out. They had found the Headmaster’s body—well his presumed body; it was too big to be that of a child—curled outside his rooms. Smoke inhalation was the immediate suspect, there. What a pitiful and painful way to go.

But the thing about burnt bodies, the particular thing about burnt bodies unassumingly crisped in an old house that was practically begging to go up in flames, was that no one would think to look for further injuries. Feet fall off when temperatures get too hot, after the body curls up as the muscles contract and bulge in the inferno. What does it matter when the Achilles Tendon snaps? Or is snapped, rather. What would it matter how bruised and cut up the now charred flesh is? And of course, the uniform scorch marks took care of any pesky, incriminating blood stains.

When the fire department finally made it on the scene, all they saw was a tragedy, with one small miracle in the form of a delinquent with a record and a habit of sneaking away at night, including this one. One who had smelt smoke while hopping the fence back onto the grounds and had bravely run for help, but the fire had burned too long. Thus he became the lone survivor of a tragic house fire.

…

“13 people, most of them minors, are reported to be dead after a house fire broke out in a Queens boys’ home. Authorities arrived on scene at the Chang Group Home for Boys at around 1:47 this morning.”

Meng Yao heard the news report from his basement bedroom and bit his cheek knowing that Mrs. Jin had yet to leave for her hair appointment. It was barely the third day of school and she would already have ample opportunity to chastise him for being late. It didn’t matter that it was barely the third day of school and he was still working what was meant to be a summer job at the local video store. He’d been up until 2 am and his alarm had gone off no later than 6:30. Who could blame him for hitting snooze and begging his younger brother, Xuanyu, to wake him at 7:00 am? Regardless, he hadn’t, and now Meng Yao was perched at the base of the stairwell waiting for Mrs. Jin to finish her coffee and leave for her appointment or at least get up for long enough to let Meng Yao sneak into the bathroom to brush his teeth. He was stuck listening to the news and Mrs. Jin’s snide commentary for another 3 minutes.

“After their preliminary investigation, the Fire Department of New York has declared the fire accidental, citing out-of-date electrical wiring and a faulty air conditioning system.” They played a brief clip of the Fire Chief expressing his condolences for the tremendous loss of life and explaining what the news anchor had already confirmed. “Our hearts here at the NYFD are with the surviving child,” he added bittersweetly before the broadcast presumably cut back to the station. “This youth is reported to be in state care until other arrangements can be made.” Meng Yao heard Mrs. Jin huff. “In other news—.”

“City’s gone to shit,” Mrs. Jin said, before flicking the channel to one of those morning talk shows stay-at-home wives liked. Stuff about new recipes and the best back-to-school buys. Mrs. Jin was the type of woman who would make others wait. It was her appointment after all, shouldn’t it be about her? If Meng Yao kept it up he’d be late anyway without the guarantee that he’d go unnoticed.

He trotted up the stairs, darting around the corner into the bathroom to no avail. “You’re still here? You’re already going to be late on the first week?” While Mrs. Jin certainly would not hold back with her words most days, today it was all in her tone. You’re still here was loaded with years of resentment and anticipation for the moment she would not have to see the reminder of her husband’s infidelity.

There was really no use explaining himself and even though an apology wouldn’t get him very far either, Meng Yao said sorry as he rushed into the kitchen to find an apple. That could be both breakfast and lunch, right?

“Morning,” he said routinely when Zixuan walked into the kitchen. It would be hard to tell that they spent their mornings rushing around the same kitchen. Where Zixuan was well-dressed, Meng Yao swum in awkwardly-fitting hand-me-downs Zixuan hadn’t touched since the 9th Grade. Where Meng Yao would try in vain to style the remnants of a bad bowl cut for three seconds in the mirror before giving up, Zixuan had the privilege of spending the morning in the shower to achieve his seemingly effortlessly coiffed hair. Zixuan flashed him a smile, more focused on packing his bag. The smile, momentarily lighting up his eyes, made Meng Yao conscious of his own bleary ones, a trait his step-mother was convinced he inherited from his mother. “Zixuan doesn’t look so lifeless” and whatnot when posing for photos. Maybe he had gotten that from his mother; a little way to assure everyone that perfect Zixuan and the inconvenient Meng Yao were only half-brothers.

“Hey,” he hesitated, noticing Zixuan was halfway out the kitchen. “Would you mind giving me a ride to school? I just, um, woke up late.” Zixuan’s brows furrowed and those bright eyes softened. “I won’t ask again,” he tried to assure with an awkward half-smile.

“I’m picking up Yanli,” Zixuan responded matter-of-factly.

Of course. Though he hadn’t said no, he was picking up his girlfriend. It was stupid to ask, Meng Yao realized. Who would want to pick up their girlfriend with their brother in the car? So sexy, right? “You know what, never mind. I can figure it out.”

Zixuan’s brows remained furrowed, “Yeah, whatever you want.” He walked out the door.

It wasn’t the worst situation Meng Yao had been in, not by a long shot. He remembered the three weeks in foster care between his mother’s death and being dropped at his estranged father’s doorstep: his things in a trashbag, loud dormitories where it was impossible to sleep, being nearly a month behind in school work even though the year had just started, nearly choking to death trying not to cry himself to sleep. Not that any of this went away when he arrived in the quiet new-build suburb in upstate New York with a fading tan from the Nevada sun, like he’d been on vacation, and his mom’s ashes precariously in his 13 year old arms. Who would blame Madam Jin for turning up her nose?

Xuanyu, who was just 8 when Meng Yao had arrived, was the only one who seemed excited to have him, and that was mostly because he would not have to sleep alone in the basement anymore. Meng Yao remembered the pit in his stomach, seeing that scrawny little boy eager to show him around and explaining that he didn’t need to be afraid anymore since his older half-brother was here now and could protect him from the monsters that undoubtedly hid in the shadows of the dimly lit storage-room-turned-bedroom. In hindsight, it should have been a warning sign when Xuanyu innocently, almost pathologically naively, explained that the Jin couple kept ‘forgetting’ to buy him a nightlight. But at the time, it didn’t matter to Meng Yao. He was a few months shy of his 14th birthday and didn’t plan on staying long, especially once he got his first New York job at the local thrift store. About three weeks into that, the best he’d gotten to show for his hard work was a much-appreciated nightlight for his new little brother and an empty shoebox which he labelled “College Fund.” His mother would want him to go to college, rather than become a 14-year-old high school dropout working some shitty job for the rest of his life.

Three years later, and he was walking to his last year of high school, dreaming of college admissions. Years of working and stashing away half of every paycheque had brought him close to his goal and, according to the guidance counselor, he had the grades to get a decent scholarship, so long as he kept up the hard work and the extra curriculars. And oh did he: a full time table, staying later after school for the last 3 years; Mondays and Wednesdays for Student Council and Fridays for Model UN, Thursday mornings for Debate club. “No sports though,” the guidance counselor had told him last year, face screwed like it was a crime to have asthma. “Lots of scholarships in sports, you know.” Meng Yao had just rolled his eyes. Regardless, when would he have the time for a sport? Meng Yao wondered if he could squeeze something else in as he walked to school. This was his last year after all. Maybe Drama club, or... His thoughts trailed of, exhausted. Who was he kidding, how on Earth would he keep going like this? Working nights and weekends, falling onto his bed after a long day of classes and extra curriculars and mind numbingly boring shifts at Video World, just to get up a few hours later to do it all again.

But there were things about his life that he had actually come to enjoy.

“Morning,” Meng Yao whispered as he plopped down beside Lan Xichen.

Math class wasn’t all that bad. For one, Meng Yao was quite good at it. Maybe Mathletes would round out his college application. The senior math teacher had been overjoyed when he heard that Meng Yao planned on majoring in Finance and becoming an accountant, so he probably would be overjoyed to have Meng Yao on the team this year. Or anyone on the team for that matter.

“Did you sleep in?” Xichen whispered under the lesson on Functions, even though he had a near-pathological fear of being rude.

“Yeah.”

Xichen held out a granola bar. “You didn’t eat, did you?”

Meng Yao took the bar in response. No. He gave Xichen a familiar half-smile in thanks and got one in return.

Eating in class was technically frowned upon, but fainting in class would mean certain social death, so Meng Yao decided to nibble on small pieces of granola whenever the teacher was turning towards the board. When he had finally finished the granola and rubbed his fingers against each other to get rid of the sticky film of leftover honey, Xichen handed him a perfectly clean cloth handkerchief. Sometimes it was hard to forget that the uncle Xichen was living with was old, rich, and as traditionalist as it got.

“Thanks again,” whispered Meng Yao, and, with a bat of his eyelashes, added: “How lucky I am to have befriended such a perfect gentleman. Should I iron it before I give it back?”

“That would be much appreciated,” answered Xichen with an expression so serious it could only be mocking, “For if my uncle were to find out I bequeathed this to anyone but a fiancée or a wife he would surely lock me in the attic for the rest of the semester.”

Meng Yao hid his laugh with a cough and their teacher turned around.

“Anything to share with the class, Mr. Meng? Mr. Lan?”

“Nothing of note, I apologize,” said Meng Yao before Xichen could feel guilty, “I’m having some issues with my contacts and asked Xichen to help me read the last equation. I did not mean to disturb the lesson.”

The teacher gave his favourite student a reproachful look but continued his lesson without another hitch. Xichen looked at Meng Yao with an amused twitch to his lips.

“I did not know your perfect vision had worsened.”

“Do keep my secret.”

They turned their focus back to the lesson and before long the bell ended the most pleasant ninety minutes of Meng Yao’s day.

“Will I see you at lunch?”

If he imagined a hopeful undertone in Xichen’s voice that was nobody’s business.

“I’ll be present.”

He would decidedly not sit with Xichen and Nie Mingjue, but he would be present. It had its perks. He was less easily distracted from his actual food intake.

“Could I talk to you about homecoming then? There are some things we need to figure out and I would really like your opinion on them. We’ll decorate later this week, but I know you’re busy, so I’d like to run it by you during school hours.”

“Um, yeah, of course.” Meng Yao tried not to sound overexcited, it was just homecoming after all. But it was a welcomed distraction. He fondly remembered when they were on prom committee last year, even though they didn’t attend. Tossing streamers into the bag and then at each other while they swept up the gymnasium. There was something so liberating about being alone with Xichen, their laughter echoing off the walls as they ate leftover finger foods and talked about their summer plans. “I can meet you in the library after class on Friday, if that works?”

“That would be lovely.” Xichen smiled and headed down the hall toward English class.

—

Model UN was fine. They spent most of the hour preparing for the next conference, pouring over books about Nuclear Warfare and Treaty Rights. Truth be told, Meng Yao was only half listening while he took notes on the school typewriter. He was about halfway through mindlessly typing “excellent work, gang. Have a nice weekend” before he realized they were breaking.

Xichen was in the library as promised, happily getting ahead on his Physics homework. “Sorry,” Meng Yao apologized.

“What for?”

“I’m late.”

“Hardly.” Xichen produced an apple from his bag. “It’s really fine, I know that you have Model UN and all.”

“Thanks,” Meng Yao accepted the apple.

“Plus, Wangji has volleyball practice tonight anyway and he needs a ride home.” Xichen produced a binder of details and Meng Yao practically swooned when he saw the colour-coding. It was a system they had devised together: Green for finances, blue for food and drink, red for legal things—forms and whatnot—and so forth. “So, decorations. I revised the budget and we can free up some extra money. We need a theme, no? For the dance portion.”

“Yes. And if we’re doing spirit week—do we have spirit days picked out?”

Xichen flipped a few pages ahead, mumbling to himself, “School colours, Flashback Day, PJ Day, Beach Day, Jersey Day.”

Meng Yao screwed up his face at the disjointed roster. God, didn’t their co-council members have any idea about cohesion? “Well, we have to keep Jersey Day for Game Night, but we can build up to the home-coming dance theme with each spirit day, no?”

Xichen gleefully crossed out PJ Day and Beach Day and Meng Yao swore he looked relieved. “What about doing Americana? Its the school’s 75th anniversary this year, we can keep the School Colours, the jersey and the flashback and substitute Beach Day and PJ Day for something a little more New York or at least closer to New Hoenderloo High history.”

“Gangster Day?” Meng Yao suggested.

Xichen scoffed. “What does New Hoenderloo have to do with the mob?”

“I don’t know, our prime export is corn and varsity jocks. But we’re so close to New York that I’m sure people won’t bat an eye.”

Xichen nodded and added Gangster Day to the agenda. He supposed it was better than Farm Day or something.

“And, um, we can do a classic American Day? Red, White, and Blue and that junk. Founding fathers.”

“Would work.”

“And we can decorate the homecoming dance with American Classics, a jukebox instead of a DJ, we can serve milkshakes, and do ‘50s Diner lighting?”

Xichen laughed. He loved Meng Yao’s big ambitions. “Remember, I said, some money was freed up. We’re hardly Studio 54.”

“Let me see that budget.” Meng Yao poured over the numbers, looking for missed unnecessary spending. “A jukebox is way cheaper than a DJ, you know. That saves us a couple hundred bucks easy. Plus, if we raise the ticket prices by a few dollars, we can make up the difference. That’s not even including fundraisers like the Football Team Charity Car Wash or the Meat Raffle.” Meng Yao wrote out all the numbers neatly so that Xichen would have something to show the rest of the committee on how to really throw a great home-coming.

“See, this is why we need you to be vice-president!”

Meng Yao blushed. “Really? Little ol’ me?”

He suddenly became less playful when he saw Lan Wangji appear in the library. Wangji was, of course, polite, like his older brother, and, of course, also socially awkward, drastically unlike his older brother. So, he would wait stoically in the library entry until his brother would notice him, rather than interrupting them and risking making small talk with Meng Yao. “Your brother is done with practice, I think.”

Xichen waved and asked Wangji a bunch of questions: How was practice? When is the next game? Would he need something to eat? And Wangji replied simply: “Good. Tuesday. No. Can’t spoil dinner.”

“Ready to go home?”

“Yes.”

Meng Yao packed his things up alongside Xichen, happily chattering about how much progress they made in just a half hour. “It’s really coming together,” he added as he went to turn left to catch the bus.

“Would you like a ride home?” Xichen offered.

“It wouldn’t be too much trouble, would it?”

“You live a couple blocks away from us. It would be far more convenient.”

Meng Yao’s lips curled softly, gratefully. “Then, I would love a ride. Thank you.”

—

“Looks like you have guests,” Xichen observed, trying to make pleasant conversation as always. Meng Yao recognized that car. God, he wondered if that social worker worked on commission, a little extra for every traumatized child she dragged to Jin Guanshan. God knows there were probably enough bastards to make up an entire career. Meng Yao’s tired sigh turned into an airy half-laugh, mostly at his own joke. But Xichen smiled. “Have a lovely visit,” he added when he pulled into the driveway and let Meng Yao out of the car.

“Thanks. And thanks again for the ride home, I really appreciate it.”

“Anytime, A-Yao.”

Mrs. Jin had put out tea and coffee, even a tray of baked goods. Her gentle sips and small, delicate bites quickly hardened into a tight frown. Meng Yao felt like he did three years ago. Mrs. Jin was consistent; she wore the same tired, expectant face and flashed her cold, irritated gaze at Meng Yao when he froze in the living room. “A-Yao, our other son.” Meng Yao almost rolled his eyes at how much Mrs. Jin visibly struggled to call him ‘our son.’ “You must remember him?” Her voice was pleasant enough when talking to the social worker.

“I do. How are you? How is school? Still playing soccer?”

“Good. And good.” Meng Yao had never played soccer in his life, but he played along and told her that he might even be getting a scholarship for it. No one knew enough to correct him, anyway.

She gave him a well-rehearsed polite smile, before turning her attention back toward Mrs. Jin. “I trust you know the drill. If there are any problems, please do not hesitate to call. Though you should know.” She trailed off and Meng Yao could see her thinking through what to say next. “You know, he has had some problems in his group homes, but those situations are volatile for any child. A stable, loving home like this one will probably do him good.”

            Meng Yao’s attention turned to the muffled conversation Xuanyu was having with someone in the basement.

So he had a new brother now, he supposed. And a new roommate.

            “And this is Meng Yao!” He heard Xuanyu say before he was even halfway down the stairs. Really, who else could it have been? Who else would want to go down into their creepy, damp basement bedroom? Meng Yao forced his most welcoming smile. He remembered how shy he felt when he first came to New York. Shy and lonely and so, so angry at the world. A smile and a polite, calm introduction was the least he could do.

            The boy, who couldn’t have been much younger than he was, gave him a full smile. “Hi.” There was something so juvenile about that smile that it unnerved Meng Yao. It wasn’t innocent like Xuanyu’s, happy regardless of his circumstances. No, this was boyish in a hedonistic way, sharp and carefree; all pointed canines and no baby teeth.

            “Xue Yang.” He said, bobbing his chin and widening his smile to an almost wolfish state.

            “Nice to meet you, Xue Yang.” Meng Yao could thankfully recover the conversation quite quickly. He welcomed first years all the time, and even though Xue Yang was going into Junior year and would hardly be as intimated of him as a 13-year-old, he was sure the faltering of his welcoming tone would go unthought of. “I can’t imagine your coming here was brought on by good circumstances, so—”

            “Oh no, asshole cardboard suburbanites were my childhood dream.” Meng Yao quickly learned that Xue Yang liked to laugh at his own obnoxious sarcasm. A lot. And Xuanyu, ecstatic at yet another older brother, also liked to laugh.

            “So, if you want to talk about it,” he continued, trying to move on from Xue Yang’s instant dislike of the situation, “I would be more than happy to.” It really was not Meng Yao’s place to judge him for it. If his childhood was anything like his own, filled with promises of a dad who was just coming back, always just coming back someday, then Xue Yang was likely utterly disappointed by the dad who had just relegated him to the basement and was headed back to work after making his wife do all the talking. No fancy house and fully-stock fridge could make up for that.

            “Meng Yao is really good at talking,” Xuanyu assured. “My mom slit her wrists when I was five.”

            Xue Yang scoffed at his candour, a cheeky grin spreading. “You really just say whatever the hell you want, eh?” Xuanyu nodded, just happy to get someone’s attention. Xue Yang loved it when kids were stupid.

            “And my aunt always told me it was my fault. But Yao-gege said its not and he always tells me that when I have nightmares. So, he can make you feel better.”

            “Xuanyu.” Meng Yao gave him a gentle pat on the back of his head, dropping his voice to a whisper. “remember, we don’t have to tell everyone everything, okay?”

            “Why not? We’re brothers!”

            “Yeah,” Xue Yang turned back to his trashbag-suitcases and began to take over the bottom bunk. “We’re brothers, aren’t we, Yaoyao?”

            My bed…, Meng Yao thought about explaining Xue Yang could have the clearly unused top bunk but thought against it. What was the difference anyway?

[koishiro]

# - 𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐅𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐒

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ — 𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒 : bumping into (what you thought was) your enemy on a winters morning, you realise he isn’t so much of the annoying boy you once thought he was. bakugo just wants you to know how deeply he feels for you, chasing that hug that was ripped so viciously away from him

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ — 𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐑𝐄 : slight angst to fluff??

˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆ — 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓 : 2k

=͟͟͞͞ ⌧ 𝐌𝐀𝐈𝐋 : i put this off for so long… (this is actually kinda pointless)

masterlist | bnha masterlist

I bundled myself up in my winter coat — the same old grey one my mother had bought me years prior, slowly falling apart yet still thick and warm. I hadn’t walked a block before I felt the chill of an impending snowstorm settling around my shoulders like a blanket; but undaunted by what lies ahead on this brisk morning walk towards the school building, I gathered up the courage to continue. There's something special about stepping out into nature after all - no matter what conditions lay ahead.

The cold morning air numbed my nose as the icy breath of winter settled upon the landscape. It was colder than usual, prompting me to draw my coat tightly around myself in an effort to contain my body's warmth. The trees were beautiful that day, with no green leaves in sight—just a blanket of fresh white snow dancing by way of a glimmering light between them and reflected off the frozen-over lake where a few daring children slid across its surface like seals on ice.

There was something indefinable in the crisp air and soft light of this morning that made me feel more alive. Everywhere around, colors shone in a sharper hue than usual, and birdsong sang through the trees with a special clarity. I half-closed my eyes and breathed it all in - cinnamon spice from somewhere nearby mingling with the smoky scent of woodfires out on nearby stalls; remembering shared Christmases back home surrounded by family laughter; wondering what they'd be doing right now.

I had been living in Japan not too long and was attending the prestigious U.A High School, where heroes came to refine their abilities and skills. But despite my best efforts, there was one boy who seemed to have a problem with me; he always picked on me for no reason other than maybe his own insecurity or jealousy of my growing reputation as a powerful hero. His taunts were unrelenting and every time I encountered him it felt like an assault from the inside out – I could let myself be thrown off balance by his words or strive to take back control of what he thought would break me down.

You were well aware of Bakugo's temper, which could sometimes spiral into an eruption of unchecked anger. But the most incredible thing about him was his restraint. Despite this misdirected fury, you never saw Bakugo direct it at anyone in particular — not even you who he had made a habit of singling out for years previously. It seemed that though his voice rose to a deafening pitch and those flares of emotion coursed through him like electricity, they somehow remained safely contained until they could eventually be dissipated in harmless fizzles and scowls against the wall or table instead aimed at any living soul.

Bakugo was a raging storm in human form, his temper quick to flare and his voice booming even when he wasn't speaking. His words were always tinted with anger or annoyance whenever you had the misfortune of being within earshot. You would frequently find yourself watching him from afar, holding your breath as if bracing for some kind of ripple effect akin to dropping a pebble in still water - any attempt at conversation instantly dissipated like dust in the wind no matter how innocent it seemed and although you never really liked him, there was an air of resignation that surrounded both your interactions; one born out of desperation and necessity rather than out of desire.

Still, something was different this time as he looked at you with a newfound emotion, like he had just caught a dazzling vision come to life outside the barriers that both societies had seemingly placed between you. His words were more gentle now and even in the cold winter air around you felt an unrestrained warmth; one that rapidly began to thaw your heart and have it beat with a foreign feeling you had never experienced before.

Bakugo stood before me like a soldier at rest – tall and proud, but still uncertain. His breath was visible in the cold winter air as he exhaled heavily. He wore his usual confidence on top of an otherwise unreadable face, clad in a fluffy navy bobble hat, the kind with woolen pom-poms and a soft foldover band. His signature orange winter coat was cut and draped around him like an ancient cape; two large buttons on either side kept it secured against his body. His feet were sheathed in high black Doc Martens - thick leather uppers, heavy rubber soles – which gave him both stability and protection from whatever might threaten below.

Tension emanated from him and his eyes flickered with nervous energy as he shifted from one foot to the other, not knowing what to say or do next. Despite this display of uncertainty I could feel how strong he was beneath it all; a force too powerful for any mere words or actions by himself alone to suppress.

The same could be said of me, though I was more shy and introverted compared to him. A soft pink scarf hung from my end, complimenting my skin and my hair situated in an intricate updo. I drew strength from his presence, becoming bolder as he shifted from one foot to the other.

He gestured with his outstretched hand, the metal of my house keys glinting in the morning light. "You dropped this, dumbass" he said softly. I looked down to see my own keychain lying in his open palm, each individual key jutting upwards like a tiny hill.

“Oh, thank you Bakugo” I gave a grateful smile and reached out my gloved hand for my keys but before I could take them back, Bakugo's fingers closed around them, drawing them closer to his chest - holding them captive. My gaze shifted to his face where a frown had planted itself across the brows of his deep eyes, “why do you always call me that?”

I gazed up at him, noting the pensive expression that had come across his face. It was clear to me this bothered him - why wouldn't I call him Bakugo? I had no reason to call him anything else nor did I want to. But instead of words, all that came out of my mouth was an uncertain "Sorry?"

His frustration had reached its boiling point. He gritted his teeth, his hands balling into fists at his sides as the words left his lips - “you always call me Bakugo. Why?” His expression changed from one of anger to something sadder and more lost, as if he wanted desperately for someone to understand why he felt so frustrated all the time. His arms dropped limply down by his side in a gesture of helplessness and despair before finally turning away from me, instead glaring at the snow covered ground.

He moved forward slowly, his feet grinding out a path in the crisp white snow with each step. His winter coat was like a beacon amidst all the greys and whites of our silent surroundings; marking his presence for me to follow as I kept my distance behind him.

The surrounding trees were frozen and still, their icy frosted leaves reminding me of childhood winters when I stayed up late searching between constellations in night skies trying to find warmth amongst celestial forms. Breaking through our shared silence he muttered something under his breath that seemed small yet profound enough that it urged me closer towards him than ever before without us having said a word.

“‘m sorry”

I abruptly halted my steps, and heard Bakugo follow suit a few feet in front of me. My head spun around to face him, and I uttered in disbelief: “You’re sorry?” The sarcasm of my voice was thick enough to choke on, a scathing undertone only barely contained by its edge of seething contempt. “Do you know what exactly it is that you’re apologising for? Or is this simply another one of your feeble attempts at humour?"

Bakugo shifted uncomfortably in his spot, clearly not used to having to deal with these sorts of feelings - let alone apologise for them. His words were stilted and clumsy as he tried to express himself, "I’m a dick I know, but I don’t mean to be-"

Bakugo cut himself off as soon as he noticed the deadpan look on my face. His mouth quirked downwards into a frown and his eyes darted away from mine. He began to fidget, it was clear he wasn't quite sure what to do with himself in this uncomfortable moment.

He cleared his throat before speaking again, almost uncertainly at first. "I mean... I was aware of what I was doing, and I know you don't exactly like me," His voice was low now; slightly embarrassed by the admission of knowing our strained relationship for too long had been unrequited on both our parts.

"I can't help it," he continued, lifting his gaze back up towards mine. "You're just so... nice" He said the last bit softly, almost as if he were telling me a secret and didn't want anyone else to hear it. I felt my cheeks flush at the sudden compliment and found myself wanting to say something back, but I couldn't think of anything suitable.

I stared up at him as the words spilled out of his mouth, my brows furrowed in confusion, “You get along with everyone and it pisses me off” His voice was laced with frustration and anger, “the stares you get and the way people just find it so easy to approach you - it really fucking pisses me off”

Bakugo held his hands tightly in front of him, his eyes wild and bright with fury. His clenched fists trembled while he spoke, each word coming harder than the last. "And I'm over here thinking over what to say to you every fucking morning," he ranted, "every fucking morning while you greet everyone else in that damn class except for me!"

As the words left him like arrows flying from a bowstring, so did all of his remaining fight. He hung limply between them both; drained by what had just flown from his mouth as if a heavy veil had been lifted revealing something underneath too vulnerable and raw for him to handle.

My mind raced as I tried to figure out why he was so angered by something that had nothing to do with either one of us - why would I greet someone who’d snarl at me either way?

“Remember valentines? Those stupid flowers you got on your desk?”Of course I did, how could I not? It was the first time anyone got me anything remotely thoughtful. “I spent two fucking hours picking them out, for some stupid fucking meaning that got half-and-half a hug - he stole my hug!”

The words hit me like a slap across the face. I would've laughed at the pout on his face if it weren't for the sheer seriousness lacing his voice. He spoke of these small tokens of love with such wistfulness - as though he had been robbed of some deep, passionate feeling that those little flowers held within them.

His unchecked rage and emotions were evident on his features as if someone had given him back an empty box after holding out their hands for something valuable, something precious; his stolen hug.

Bakugo had tried to mask his handwriting without realising how similar it was to Shoto’s…

All this time I had thought it was Shoto who had given me those beautiful pink tulips tied with a delicate white laced bow. The sheer joy and amazement that filled my heart when I saw them sitting on my desk nearly made me squeal in delight. Without thinking, I ran over to where Shoto was standing and wrapped him in an enthusiastic hug only to now realize months later that it was Bakugo's broken frown behind those flowers all along.

”I didn't know…”, my words dragging from me like a broken record. My voice was but a whisper, laden with the pain he must've felt all this time. Those small gestures that had gone unnoticed had meant more than I could have ever guessed; it stung to know that they'd been overlooked completely when all he wanted was for them to be seen by me - for me to understand everything without him having to say anything at all.

“That’s what hurts,” he spoke louder now, but his resolution held no heat or spite - just hurt in its purest form; acknowledgement of what hadn't been realised earlier gracing his lips as I waited to hear whatever it was lingering in his voice.

"All I ever wanted was for you to see me," he said quietly, averting my gaze and swallowing hard before continuing. "I know that none of what I did is forgivable. But all these years, I kept on hoping that maybe someday you would actually see me"

He looked up at me, an unspoken plea in his eyes. "I'm not asking for you to forgive or forget - I just wanted you to understand why I made all of those mistakes, why my life became so disordered and chaotic. All those stupid things I did to you, pulling your hair or kicking your chair - all for you to see me, ‘m sorry”

Those two words had never held so much emotion before. All those teasing moments, all the crying I had done meant nothing yet meant everything.

Closing the small distance between our feet, I hugged him with such warmth it battled his own. Bakugo was clearly shocked at first, not realising its intent would end with my arms wrapped around his middle. He remained motionless for a moment, hesitating before slowly wrapping his own muscular arms around me in an embrace that felt like a shield from the world outside our small bubble of newly found comfort.

“What did they mean?” I said, my voice muffled by his orange puffer jacket. Tilting his head to level my own he stared down at me with a confused look, “the flowers, what did they mean?”

He moved in closer and pushed back the collar of his coat to get a better look into my eyes; I could smell a slight hint of cologne on him that was sweet but faint and it made me shiver slightly in response. His lips parted as if about to speak before he suddenly paused again and ran one hand through the sandy brown tresses on top of his head

“You can’t laugh at me, ‘kay?”

Resting my chin on his chest, I stared up at him in wonder. He mumbled something I couldn’t quite make out; asking him to repeat himself, he mumbled again, this time clearer: “I care for you” Those simple words sent a flood of emotion through me that felt like a million stars lighting up my eyes – “that’s what they mean”

Had I thought I’d be here now, wrapped in the arms of the boy I swore to hate as he whispers these words to me, I would've thought I was crazy.

I felt a warmth spreading through me even though it was colder than cold outside but that didn't matter because my heart no longer held any hate for him anymore; I had let it melt away with the first touch of our embrace beneath that snow-covered sky.

“Can I have my keys back now?”

—

=͟͟͞͞ ⌧ 𝐌𝐀𝐈𝐋 (2) : #3 in my 𝘶𝘱𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬𝘴 / 𝘥𝘳𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘴

— 𝘒𝘰𝘪 𝘹𝘰

[dasketcherz]

Please spread your Beckory Agenda (hc’s) with us🌸💕🌸💕🌸💕🌸

∆ they totally help/copy each other with their school homework

∆ gregory loves to give tony (& his other friends) drawings as a form of friendly art gifts, and tony kept every single one of it safe in a folder or when he really loves it so much he hangs it up in his own bedroom

∆ gregory doesnt like being touched unprompted, especially by strangers. But whenever he's the one who initiates physical contact, it means he's showing signs of beginning to trust having you around

∆ ^^^ with that said, he developed the tendency to play around with Tony's hand. Poking his palms, playfully intertwining their fingers together, clasping them together as a way of innocently stimming that way, a sign of being very comfortable around him. Tony didn't mind it, he grew to like that habit with greg too

∆ ^^^ greg has smaller hands than tony's. So it was extra cozy when they held hands (even platonically before their relationship became more than friends)

∆ greg loves building a fort, he finds joy in making a cozy tent where he and his best friend(s) can just get lost in their little world together

∆ when tony's sleepovers at greg's became more and more reoccurring, it has become very noticeable to the point his mom and grandma also takes notice. When he's bout to ask his mom, there came a point she just cuts him off with "yes yes you can stay at Greg's tonight, just make sure to text me when you're there okay?" and his grandma chimes in "say hello to Greg for me!" and even started insisting tony bring home made cooking of hers when he goes to his best friend's place. They essentially became a lil extended family through the relationship the kids have as very close friends

∆ tony is the only one in the friend group that calls gregory "greg"—Cassie calls him by his full name while Ellis tends to call him anything else but his real name lmao

Gregory was caught off guard the first time it slipped Tony's mouth, during a situation where he needed some comfort on top of that, so the cute lil nickname felt sorta special to him

∆ greg is very sweet and nice around his friends. so you can imagine the look of surprise in tony's face when he saw the feisty side of greg when bullies try to mess with him or his friends. Just when he thought greg was a pretty cool kid already—he thinks strongly of it being true after that. They make each other feel safe for having one another's back

∆ tony begins to develop the tendency of being lowkey a mom friend around greg. As much as capable greg is on his own, tony observed that he still tends to forget about lookin after himself when he gets busy lookin after others, so he's the one to do that for greg. (this becomes such a prominent behavior after overcoming and healing from the GGY incident for both of them)

Like lending him his coat when the lil guy forgets to bring his in a cold weather outside (happens a lot, to the point tony's coat(s) gets mixed up with greg's clothes when he forgets to return it back), or tony packin extra cuz he just have the feelin greg is bound to forget to bring his lol, greg appreciates it a lot tho—tony eventually earned the title of "my knight and shining armor" from greg cuz of the countless times he's been a life saver for him

[the-amazing-digital-guardians-au]

So, some of you are probably wondering why some characters of The Amazing Digital Guardians have bad teeth. @localcanadiancryptid22 mentioned this in a reblog for one of my posts (not singling you out negatively I’ve really been looking for an excuse to talk about this—) And there was also an Anonymous ask about why Caine’s teeth are so bad. I’ll give a rundown of why I draw teeth the way I do!

Yellow Teeth - Ragatha, Jax, and (eventually) Gangle

A huge pet peeve of mine is that I hate using pure white as a color for my drawings (this is just me though, people can do whatever they want). So, usually, when coloring eyes and teeth, I go for an off-white/cream color or sometimes yellow for things like eyes and teeth, because it looks more natural to me. These characters all have yellow teeth, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that they’re all unhygienic. Ragatha is probably the cleanest member of the circus, and she brushes her teeth! They’re just yellow. The first character I colored for this AU was Jax, and he has yellow eyes and teeth—so I stuck with it for Ragatha too.

Black teeth: Pomni

Pomni has black teeth because she used to smoke when she was a human, and it’s a habit that has carried over into the digital world. I just grossly exaggerated the effect of it on her teeth (because the Circus is a very exaggerated, animated world). I kind of also just wanted to deviate from giving everyone off-white or yellow teeth because I thought it would be a bit boring.

Bad Teeth: Caine

Caine’s horrible looking teeth are just a representation of his poor habits, like smoking and drinking, since they are known to ruin teeth and gums. The reason why Pomni has black teeth and he has brown/dirty teeth is because I just wanted to make them look different!

Tooth gaps: Jax and Pomni

Both of these characters have tooth gaps, with Pomni’s being much wider than Jax’s. I honestly just like imperfections on characters and teeth gaps are my favorite, since they’re easy to draw and can vary in width, so not everyone looks the same.

Metaphor of Teeth:

I guess teeth are kind of a metaphor in this AU. Characters who have obviously bad teeth (like Pomni and Caine) are “sinful” and have done some very bad things in life. Characters with yellow teeth (like Jax and Ragatha) look a bit more natural, but even they haven’t lived completely innocent lives. I believe that Gooseworx said that everyone who’s trapped in TADC is there for a reason (I could be wrong though) and the thought of even nice characters like Ragatha having a dark side intrigues me.

Other than that, a person’s hygiene (which includes brushing teeth) can say a lot about them. Are they clean? Lazy? Forgetful? Depressed? Maybe they can’t afford things like braces? A lot can be said by how they take care of themselves. To me, teeth and the mouth in general can also mean vulnerability. Things can enter the body through the mouth, we kiss with our mouths, etc.

Also, Caine is a huge set of gums and teeth. The other characters having imperfect teeth like him may signify that they’re more similar to him than they think…but bad teeth also look gross, and that’s appealing to me, for some reason.

Thanks for reading all the way to the end, if you did. This is just some insight into how I design characters.