#being attracted to men is unfortunate but i have no plans to act on it

[shegetsburned]

❝ the duke’s proposal ❞ w. satoru gojo 𝜗𝜚.

BRIDGERTON AU⌇

• — dearest gentle readers. the time has come for us to place our bets for the upcoming social season! marriage-minded mamas must consider the oldest of the gojo’s family thrilled to conquer hearts with his wits and undeniable charm. having officially announced his wish to find a bride, we certainly hope to see the young rake, on the dance floor, turn the tides and find a wife after much seasons of avoiding his duty. may the best lady win! • — a/n. i know @grumpchua asked for this and i believe it will feed some of y’all, so here’s the food <3

.nsfw.

₊˚ପ⊹ duke!gojo who you’ve known ever since your debut and has been a inconvenience in your life for quite a while. like a tick biting into your flesh, only bringing trouble and worry for yourself. truth is, the duke loved pestering you about failed courting attempts or clumsy men coming to steal your hand, only to fall with them into a life of misery and depths. you undoubtedly did not attract the smartest and wealthiest of them all and satoru took advantage of this unwanted success.

₊˚ପ⊹ duke!gojo who’s audacious. far from being a gentleman. the cockiest of all rakes. you did not only despise the man, you thought he was without honour, unromantic and arrogant. lord satoru was, in fact, everything you thought he was, but loved to show you personally every single one of his flaws.

₊˚ପ⊹ duke!gojo who, despite your best efforts, thought no better but to follow you around at every ball and "unexpectedly" bump into you at the market or when you walked out of the modiste. lord gojo was high in the instep, purposely shoving his strength of character and title in unfortunate suitors’ faces every time they deemed to approach you. needless to say, he took pleasure in crushing your chances of ever securing a proposal.

₊˚ପ⊹ duke!gojo who has never really shown any interest in you, before. he would rather amuse himself by courting pretty debutantes only to leave them hanging and being chased by the impatient mamas of the ton. that was until his status caught up to him and forced the man to consider a serious marriage proposal. unfortunately for you, an idea blossomed into the young rake’s mind when he realized his need to find a bride was more urgent than he hoped to be.

₊˚ପ⊹ duke!gojo who, one evening, during a tranquil promenade, abruptly stops and steals you from your mama, offering his hand for you to finish your walk beside him. he obviously had a plan and it involved the lady that despised him the most in this entire ton: you— and who would be better than you to not catch feelings and be able to execute his plan perfectly?

₊˚ପ⊹ duke!gojo who proposes an alliance. knowing you only attract the worst suitors possible, he assures you that more eligible men will throw themselves at your feet when they see the famous duke gojo court you. he swears it’ll only be temporary until he can find a suitable bride of his own without hundreds of ladies begging for his attention when you’re wrapped around his arm. you’ll be found desirable and he’ll have the peace he desires. what could possibly go wrong?

₊˚ପ⊹ duke!gojo who, for the first days, tries harder than any other years you’ve known him. the first day, your carriage’s waiting downstairs to meet him in the parc. he’s holding your umbrella above your head the whole time and acting like quite the gentleman, for once. he laughs with you, readjusts your hair and takes care of every single one of your needs. this masquerade goes on for two weeks where, each day, he surprises you with gorgeous flowers, kind gestures and words you would’ve never thought to hear. until one night, it’s an invite to his mansion that’s waiting for you, which you accept thinking it’ll just be another public appearance with him by your side. oh, but you couldn’t have been more wrong.

₊˚ପ⊹ duke!gojo who welcomes you in his home, one gentle hand resting against the back of your corset to escort you to the ballroom where people were gathered and seemed to be enjoying their evening. everything would’ve seemed in order if not for the many men eyeing you from across the room. it seemed odd now, considering you hadn’t had this kind of attention for weeks, but it also seemed like satoru’s plan had worked and you couldn’t be more satisfied.

₊˚ପ⊹ duke!gojo who listens to you converse with one of the gentlemen who had introduced himself to you. he seemed kind, polite, educated and of high status, which couldn’t have been more perfect if it hadn’t been for the duke terminating the conversation with a harsh remark and by guiding you to the dance floor without even writing his name on the card around your wrist. he had lost his temper in a matter of seconds and you were more than surprised by his lack of manners.

₊˚ପ⊹ duke!gojo who tries to convince you to play along but you know this is entirely about something else. his grip around your waist and hand has never been so tight. he’s pulling you closer until his breath tickles your face and his words are whispers when he reminds you that your deal isn’t over and you’ll have to wait until you are allowed to let yourself be courted by other men. you try to respond but he spins you around gracefully. his fingers trail your column when he catches you and before you know it, you’re dancing with him and no one else is in the room.

₊˚ପ⊹ duke!gojo whose deep gaze startles you. he hasn’t left your eyes and does not plan to until he gets a proper response from you. satoru’s piercing blue eyes linger on your lips with a cocky smirk and you don’t know why your heart is beating so fast. he had never shown this facet of his before and it made your chest flutter. would he have preferred your attention was entirely on him, this evening, and not on the handsome suitor that had caught yours? no. you hated him. he was tricking you to make it seem real.. right?

₊˚ପ⊹ duke!gojo whose tension is enough to fill the room with curious whispers surrounding your odd pair. you two made it seem like you had shared more than simple dinners and promises. in front of everyone, you looked used to being so intimate with satoru, but you were trembling in your shoes when he leaned forward, grazing his lips against your ear to try and make you understand that he wouldn’t allow any suitors to approach you just yet.

₊˚ପ⊹ duke!gojo who pulls you away from the crowd, stealing you away to his bedchamber in front of indiscreet pairs of eyes. he seems more impatient than ever when his instinct takes over and, god, your innocence has an unexpected hold on him. you question satoru with incomprehension in your eyes until he finally closes the door to answer you.

₊˚ପ⊹ duke!gojo who skillfully shows you everything you’ve been missing and every little sinful activity he’s been partaking in with innocent debutantes such as yourself. only this time, he means it. his hands touch every sensitive spot, his lips cover yours and trail down to your exposed chest. his fingers slipped under your dress, letting him discover your body with your help as you take him in, whining at his insensitive touch.

you’ll never know, that night, if duke satoru gojo meant to lose his mind over you in front of everyone else for his scheme and personal gain or if it had been purely accidental and you had just mesmerized the rake in a matter of weeks to the point where he couldn’t think about anything else but to have you in his bed for the rest of his life.

© shegetsburned 2024 please do not repost/edit/or claim my writing as your own.

[pruneunfair]

The internalized sexism in remarried empress, (for an ask)

*this is going to be a long one so hold on tight*

It's no question that remarried empress is one of the most popular manhwas on webtoon and being so popular it holds a lot of influence, unfortunately, that influence promoted the internalized misogyny in not just the readers but in other works as well.

In the first chapter, Navier is presented as this baddass perfect woman, during her divorce trial she brings in a hot rebound who also happens to be another Emperor so she wont have to give up her life as empress, sounds pretty feminist right? Unfortunately that's only one of the few times we see anything related to feminism at all.

We are soon sent back a few months before the trial and right away, Naviers ladies in waiting are tearing another woman down and already believe this new woman is a threat to Navier because the Emperor Sovieshu is attracted to this newbie

We are shown the basic concept of how the narrative wants us to view these two characters. Navier is perfect empress who is being wronged by her husband and this unnamed woman who's only crime so far was existing is a wench and a homewreaker, the ladies imply it as some sort of extreme act of disrespect for having to bathe what they believe to be a slave, proceeding with sucking up to the lead by saying they only wash their hands to bathe her as they don't even wash themselves and even when they admit this mystery woman to be beautiful they backtrack to making sure Navier is supported. You might think that this is just friends supporting friends but it goes beyond on that later on.

Later on we are introduced to this mystery woman, Rashta, a former slave found by Sovieshu in the woods who is immediately portrayed as rude, stupid, and a crybaby

The reason she cries is because she was struck and referred to as "the slave" while she wasn't very polite it's clear Rashta isn't doing this on purpose, rather it is sheer ignorance and an unusually large optimism

now, a lot of people like to say that Rashta must've done something on purpose to get Laura imprisoned and that she knew what she was doing, therfore justifying the hatred for her existence. However, Laura hit Rashta for reaching out to Navier and calls her a wench in the process

Some fans use the excuse that she smirked after Laura got sentenced to 3 days imprisonment and yes while that is excessive for Laura, Rashta was a slave only a few days ago and she's been mistreated by nobles her entire life plus I don't think she's smart enough to pull off Hannibal levels of planning like that, I personally think her smirk here is meant to be more of a "that's what she gets for treating me like that." Then a "hee hee my evil plan worked!"

the rest of the comic goes the same way, Rashta is continuously portrayed as a whore who ruined Naviers life by turning her husband against her, and she's written to be hated as a pick me who won't know her place. Rashtas pretty much every part of those "other girls" in those not like other girls templates. She's girly, loves the attention, emotional, dainty, overly sweet but secretly only has ulterior motives, and in the novel, she acts extremely childish even referring to herself in 3rd person, even when she makes good points it's all intended for the reader to laugh and jeer at her.

Shes practically designed to be the pick me archetype for baddass mary sue fans to despise and she sadly only gets worse as time goes on, not just in morals and personality but also in her writting

And how is Navier perceived?

Shes endlessly perfect, everyone loves her including several different powerful men from all different countries. Even her cheating ass husband is given the cheapest redemption arc in the end just for being sorry that he cheated and realizing how much he wants her. All the characters your meant to view as good adore her and anyone who doesn't is written as the meanest bad guy on the planet worthy of death. While she isn't the worst character I've seen, the narrative tries so hard to make her more amazing that Navier looks worse as a result, such as not caring about slavery despite being described as kind and devoted to all her subjects. Ergi even says it straight to us that there will always be that invisible wall between her and the poor.

The characters we're supposed to see as good are:

Heinrey: A king who planned on going to war with Naviers country and only stopped when he fell in love with her at first sight, who also tortures and threatens anyone who even so much as inconveniences or talks shit about her all while he puts up an innocent front to appear non threatening (wonder who that sounds like)

Kaufman: A grand Duke who drugs other people with love potions which are essentially date-rape drugs and gets away with it once another woman takes the blame

Kosair: Naviers brother who violates Rashtas autonomy by slipping abortion drugs in her food and it's never talked about again.

Lebetti: One of Rashtas slave owners who still continues to harass Rashta and views anyone lower than her with contempt including her own nephew and so on

And who are the characters we are supposed to hate?

Besides Rashta and Sovieshu, the only other characters so far are Krista, the former queen of the west and her father

Ironically Krista is hated for the same reason readers supported Navier for: not wanting to replaced as queen, which isn't helped by Heinrey asserting that Navier is the one and only queen and anyone who objects will face serious consequences but they fix that by dumbing her down and blaming her for Kaufman drugging Heinrey. As for her dad, the old Duke. While he is the only man actively against Navier so far the only ways he has been punished is being told that Krista killed herself. (In the novel the old Duke does face serious consequences which involved him being murdered along with innocent people after his son attempted a hit on Navier)

But overall you get the message, most of the characters you are supposed to love are men and ladies with no personality, men who do atrocious shit yet we're supposed to look past it and conveniently the only man who is punished is an ugly bastard.

The ladies in waiting are the biggest contributors to the internalized misogyny, often they support it by insisting any new woman who shows up must be an evil whore, even Krista's ladies in waiting do this

Not like it matters though anyway since Navier basically wins most of those girls over on her side and they're never seen again

You see what I mean? Every other woman in this story has little to no character, they exist solely to push the FL up and punch down at any woman they don't like which usually consists of women that either dainty "other girls" or ironically women in a situation similar to Naviers and any woman who opposes Navier is affectly an idiot who gets girlbossed back into place. Meanwhile almost all of the men who commit absolutely horrible acts get away with it since they all essentially go awooga for Navier, with the only exception being less than conventionally attractive dudes like Krista's dad.

for fucks sake even Alan, one of Rashtas other masters who 🍇ed her, got her pregnant and participated in keeping her child away from her until she got successful is viewed as this sorrowful wittle baby who got taken advantage of by the evil Rashta and was "wrongfully" told to screw off by her. It took an episode where Alan was so unfathomably stupid to get readers to realize they shouldn't side with a rapist, and yes, while the narrative will try to push the idea that Rashta took advantage of him to raise her status and that she consented. News flash: a slave cannot consent to someone who owns them, it's like a student-teacher relationship.

Now the hypocrisy. Navier can do one thing and it's viewed as such a girlboss power move but when someone else like Rashta does something similar, it's embarrassing and pathetic. For example, Rashta is mocked by nobles mind you, for wearing an expensive and flashy wedding dress. Meanwhile Naviers wedding dress is literally weaved with thousand of gemstones

Hey, it's their words not mine.

Or how Rashta was considered evil for stealing Naviers spot as empress (even though Rashta didn't even want to be empress at first and Sovieshu gave her the offer, it's not like she held a gun to his head) but when Krista shows distress over being replaced as queen, the comments basically tell Krista to suck it up because Navier deserves it more. Everytime a man does something wrong in this story, the characters and even the readers trace it back to somehow being a woman's fault.

Readers are even encouraged to laugh at Rashta for not being able to learn as fast and eventually having a breakdown from the stress (not to mention she's also pregnant here so those hormones must be going wild)

yeah let's just blame a pregnant woman who wasn't educated in reading until a few months ago for not being able to be as smart or stoic as Navier and then crying from the stress.

finally, how this promotion of internalized misogyny affected other works. The Trashta nickname has become so popular that it is used everytime a woman who doesn't support the MC or even just inconveniences her is introduced, constantly the comments never shut up about the "new trashta." Even women who don't mean harm like Helena from kill the villainess was treated horribly because she's the "other woman" it erases any attempt at creativity in these stories and dumbs down any other woman who isn't constantly worshipping the FL as an evil bitch who needs to go.

Conclusion:The Remarried empress isn't the feminist power book with complex characters, maybe in season 1 but not anymore. Women who even think about being rude to Navier are punched down and killed if they don't change their mind while almost all the men are excused for their cruel actions because their hot guys with abs who only wanted to protect the one and only goddess Navier.

[natequarter]

if other doctors did human nature:

one is badly cosplaying as a teacher at coal hill. susan, not having regenerative abilities, is watching over him. barbara and ian have never met the doctor as the doctor; as far as they know, he's just their crotchety coworker doctor foreman, who STILL won't share his first name. the doctor was on the run from gallifrey when he stumbled upon the family... now he's just on the run from the family of blood. regrettably, barbara got a bit too nosy in the doctor's office at one point, and took his fob watch. can susan recover the fob watch from ian and barbara before it's too late?

two lands jamie and zoe in jamie's era. look it's all very well and good that you know how to navigate eighteenth-century scotland, jamie, but i'm a bit out of my depth here!

if three did this, literally nothing would change, except that now the brigadier is being harassed by two human scientists who are smarter than him rather than one. the master lands on earth and tries to sell the doctor out to the family, only for it to backfire; the brigadier's men try and fail to shoot the family; liz insists the master pay for her therapy. the doctor barely notices the difference when he becomes a time lord again

there are two different ways i'd want to play four as a human. the first is this: harry and sarah have to put up with him. stationed at a naval base, harry and sarah must ward off the family whilst also warding off the doctor's insanity. sarah is disguised as the doctor's estranged younger brother (don't question the crossdressing) and harry is disguised as harry. inevitably things go wrong.

alternatively: rather than staying in e-space, romana returns to the main universe with the doctor. unfortunately, they manage to attract the family along the way; adric must badly pretend to be human whilst corralling two fob watched time lords who have chosen a really bad time to plan their wedding

tegan and turlough have plenty of experience with hiding from aliens, being on earth, and putting up with the doctor, but boy is he annoying as a human

the doctor gives peri exactly zero instructions and then lands them in the 1300s as an amnesiac human in the midst of the black death. peri is at her FUCKING LIMIT

much like three, very little changes for eight. this is the only one i'd still be tempted to set in 1913 à la the vna/nuwho episodes. charley gets to explore the recent past (to her, anyway) whilst acting as the severely amnesiac john smith's caretaker

honestly, rose and jack would be a remarkably competent team to be saddled with the doctor as a human... and he's falling in love with both of them, of course

amy vs the family: amy has won. rory gets possessed by the family but don't worry, it gets unwritten from time. the doctor is never doing that again, ever, yuck, he ate pears, YUCK

i don't think clara could be trusted with the doctor as a human, and if this was bill and nardole, i don't think the doctor would change much as a human. missy is not fob watched because she is in the vault and therefore simply inaccessible. bill continues to get set weird essays. the family are so focused on trying to get to missy (who they KNOW is there) that they fail to realise the doctor is there and simply perish within their three-month lifespans

[hollowsart]

Thaal Sinestro of Korugar

-cracks knuckles-

Here's ALL of his lore that I cooked up:

(warning for: the sheer ungodly length of this, mentions of death, and a low-key humorous mention of alien physiology at the end cuz I couldn't help myself--)

(Some of this might still be a slight work in progress and/or may be subject to change later on. I'm not sure yet.)

-----

Backstory:

It wasn’t supposed to end that way. He wanted her to be safe and far away from the threat of action. Unfortunately.. he had made a mistake and it cost him greatly. Both heart and mind.

The loss of his wife.. the loss of his best friend, Abin Sur’s sister.. it caused quite the disruption in their friendship.

Some time well after that horrible event, Sinestro and Abin got into an altercation. An argument while out on duty. Abin had heard of Sinestro’s plans, but he didn’t agree with them. Both men were already still rocky and broken from the loss of Arin. So, when Sinestro was plotting some way of utilizing his GL powers to enforce order and protection.. no matter how unreasonable. Abin Sur lashed out. Calling him crazy, delusional, that nothing will ever bring her back.

Sinestro.. well.. he wasn’t thinking and without any ill intention.. he attacked Abin Sur. He only wanted to try and reason with him. He didn’t mean to do it.. but a stray blast from his ring managed to wreck the ship they were traveling in.. and the blast severely damaged Abin Sur.

..Sinestro fled the ship in horror, not seeing the fate of his friend as the ship hurtled down to a particular blue planet. The thought of having presumably killed his own partner and friend on top of having already dealt with the loss of his wife.. well.

That absolutely destroyed him. Shattered him so deeply.. he’s grown distant. Disconnected and apathetic. Bottling up, locking away, and throwing the key away with his emotions..

This was the beginning of the end of his GL career.. and the lead up to him being picked up by the Yellow Corps. The immense fear and angst building up inside him being strong enough he found a new life with the Yellow Lanterns. However, he couldn’t take the life and went rogue. Taking the ring with him and starting his own little sect.

----

imagine. some late series episode that ends with a little close up of some guy who looks a bit like Vincent Price for some reason lowering his newspaper and staring in Guy & Feste's direction as they head back home for the day after having a chat at some outdoor cafe.

you don't know who this weird guy is until it's later revealed that it was Sinestro. He ALSO used his ring to go incognito and appear human so as not to attract any attention while he "stalks" Guy & Feste for some reason idk I didn't think this far.

---

it kinda adds weight to the act of killing him. but like.. it probably killed Sinestro, too.. to do it. maybe it was an accident..? unintentional… during a fight.. and Sinestro was hiding it. and although Guy reminds him of Abin Sur… he hates Guy because he reminds him of Abin Sur and what he did to him. like a weird sort of "reincarnation" thing?? if that makes sense??

Guy being so angry at Sinestro for what he did feels almost cathartic for Sinestro cuz he knows he deserves it.

---

Sinestro sees occasional visions of his wife and friend begging and pleading for his help that will never come. This fuels his fear to power his ring. he needs fear to wield it. and that is a big fear. the repetitive action of losing his wife and friend and not being able to do anything about it.

---

Miscellaneous:

Soranik Natu was given the Natu surname as she was raised by another family. whether on Ungara or Korugar is undecided, but she does keep it.

Sinestro was unable to continue raising her as he was in no condition to do so, and Arin was.. well. out of the picture.

Sinestro sees Soranik and hears her name and he knows that's his daughter and he feels sick. She looks like her mother, he can see it. There's the underlying fear of what she may think of him and how much she may take after him. He is very aware of the terrible things he has done but he is blinded, in a sense, thinking what he is doing is for the greater good. to protect people..

To protect Soranik.

From a fate that fell upon Arin Sur and many others.

---

Soranik is like a combination of the two. her horns are smaller and so are her ears. she has tiny "tusks" (fangs?) compared to her mom.

but she also has elements similar to her dad.

also I can't help but think about Sinestro saying he wishes for his daughter to not become like him, but to instead become more like her mother. honor her memory. it's a terrible loss for the universe for someone like Arin Sur to no longer be in it..

---

I 100% want there to be a moment in an episode where Sinestro's backstory is revealed. like… his life he had up to when Guy first met him. We get to see just how tragic his backstory is.

There's been some subtle little hints here and there before, like someone from on Oa hearing Guy make a remark about Sinestro's weird earring and they tell him what they know.. how it's actually something very meaningful, a combination of two races and their culture. how it is a show of respect and mourning..

the mourning rituals of both Ungarans and Korugarians came together when Sinestro lost Arin. The piercings worn by those who lost a partner from Korugar.. and the wearing of a specific flora from Ungara..

Sinestro's mournful earring has a unique flora depicted hanging from it. A custom metal made to resemble that flora from Ungara.. to honor the memory of Arin Sur. He wears it always except when bathing or resting, but he keeps it with him ever so close at all times.

Should he lose that earring at all… well…

we might just see Sinestro become a Red Lantern.

---

I do kinda like the idea that Ungara and Korugar are relatively close planets with their own races inhabiting them. and because of this, the two races are uniquely compatible, genetically speaking, which leads to how Soranik Natu was born at all when Thaal Sinestro got with Abin Sur's sister, Arin Sur. Sinestro & Arin were the first ones to discover this.

Also, Ungarans are taller than Korugarians. Soranik stands a little taller than Sinestro.

Sinestro is 5'5" (average)

Soranik is 5'9"

Arin & Abin Sur: 6'6" 6'8" (average)

---

(Warning for alien physiology talk & humor)

what if Sinestro has never seen a human before and the first time he sees Guy shirtless in the Oa locker room he notices Guy only has 2 n1ps and Sinestro is like:

"Only 2? However will you feed all your young? Surely they should starve with such a lack of bodily provisions."

And Guy stands there extremely confused. Asks him what in the ever-loving heck he's talking about. Sinestro responds by merely removing his own clothes and presents his 8 n1ps.

Guy is understandably disturbed by the implications now registering in his mind.

If Guy ever mentions pregnancy, Sinestro responds "The women carry the young and the men provide for the young. ..What does your kind do? Don't tell me the women do all the work and that you're utterly useless? You humans are quite the odd creature."

Guy is very much offended.

[bengiyo]

Be My Favorite: The Evils of Queer Surveillance

I’ve had a chance to calm down a bit, but I need to get this off my soul immediately. Kawi’s mom is engaged in a set of extremely vile and evil acts that we unfortunately have a long history with. In revealing Pisaeng’s relationship with his mother today, this show forces us to reconsider what we know of Pisaeng’s history, and forces us to question the presumptions of safety in our own communities.

Before we get into this, I will be describing her actions as evil. I do not want to contribute to a limited view of the character as inherently evil. I believe this woman is doing what she thinks is best for herself and her son. It’s important that we not fall into fundamentalist reads based in predeterministic assumptions about people’s behaviors. She is engaged in acts that are reprehensible. She likely believes she’s doing them for good reasons, and may have accepted the balance of harm and good on her own.

Normally I would take screenshots and borrow gifs to break up a post like this to make it more digestible, but I’m too upset to take all of that time. I’ll leave the writing about Pisaeng’s personal journey and the romance writing to others this week.

She Manipulated Her Son into the Closet

Pisaeng’s mother uses her positive positioning with her queer employees and lip service to queer issues to appear as an ally. She used that goodwill to convince her son that it would be best for his own reputation to be quiet about his sexuality and to keep her informed about any moves he made in that regard. Pisaeng has already seen through this, but it wasn’t until Kawi confronted him with the reality that he was hiding himself that he felt the need to push himself out more.

This is now the third time Gawin has played a character like this. All of Gawin’s genre characters know who they are and are choosing not to be out because of the inconvenience that others’ perceptions of them bring. It is absolutely heartbreaking to me that Pisaeng was not discovering his queerness in his attraction to Kawi. He was rejecting his closeted programming because of his friendship with Kawi.

It makes me so sad that Pisaeng seems tired and uncomfortable around his mother. He knows the way she operates. She colors right inside of the lines with every action she takes. He gives her a knowing look as she asks seemingly-innocent questions of Kawi. She gives a knowing look when he redirects Kawi into finishing his breakfast. She plays offended when she insinuates that he violated their agreement of being out without informing her.

I hate everything about this, and it only gets worse because she’s weaponized his own community against him.

She is Using Queer People to Spy on Her Son

Some of you may not know about The Lavender Scare or have a strong grasp on the history of law enforcement using members of a community to spy on their own people, but it’s literally how they planned the operation to assassinate Fred Hampton and other leaders. Gay communities were vulnerable to infiltration because when cops threatened enforcement of sodomy laws on white men, they turned on their own communities to avoid losing access to the privileges of whiteness. I say this plainly to show that these tactics are easily transferrable to any marginalized group when its members are isolated.

Pisaeng’s mother reminds Pisaeng that his private life does not belong to him, and that she has already turned his own community against him. She commands extraordinary wealth, which she has leveraged on her queer employees to report when her son is spotted in queer places. She seemed surprised that she was not aware of Kawi, and implies by the comment on his “unique name” that she will absolutely know who he is shortly. Pisaeng feels the threat of all of this, and steers Kawi out of there, but it’s made abundantly clear that he is not safe in queer spaces. Worse, his presence in queer spaces brings the surveillance of the ruling class down upon them immediately. In so many ways she’s made him a threat to his own community.

What’s especially sad about this is that his mother becomes an immediate wedge between Max and Pisaeng. She signals in public in ways that engender support of the queer community. Pisaeng has clearly grown to like Max, and seems to want to build a friendship with him. However, even a queer as apparently-put-together as Max can be fooled by his mom. Pisaeng doesn’t seem mad or disappointed about this; he seems resigned.

Where the Hell Do We Go from Here?

I have no idea. GMMTV went here a little bit with Not Me, and in a different direction with The Eclipse, but I wasn’t expecting them to come for queer-friendly-signaling members of the wealth class. I think they’re walking a careful line by highlighting her political ambitions but not making her a politician already. The insidiousness of the control scheme his mom has deployed against him is legitimately horrifying to me, because she crushed the spirit of her queer son right as he blossomed. I also lived in the closet, but I crushed my own spirit for them.

I know this is a BL, so we’re going to be caught up in the romance and whether or now we like Krist and Gawin together, but please don’t forget about the queerness underpinning these kinds of stories. It is abjectly evil to weaponize members of a community against each other. What is being done to Kawi and the people around him is evil. This cannot stand. She must be stopped.

[certfieddilusional]

It would kill you to try? Javier Peña x female reader part.2

pairing: Javier Peña x Female Reader

summary: You joined The DEA three months ago & after spending most of those days doing calm investigation work at the office, it’s time to face the real danger and go undercover along with Peña and Murphy to follow one of Escobar’s sicarios’ journey. But something unexpected happens that changes the work relationship you have with Javier. And that indifference you used to have between each other seems to unravel into fire,prejudice and something deeper.

chapter/content warning: swearing (like a lot of it), mentions of blood and guns, mentions of prostitution, injuries. Angst, a lot of anger and dramaaaaa. Not really that loyal to the plot of the show.

english is not my first language so, sorry if you find any mistakes.

Weeks have passed since your little first expedition and along with that, your first exchange of an actual conversation with Javier Peña, that didn’t include monosyllables or office talk. Adding also Murphy in the picture, you have grown fond of the pair, exchanging more interactions and actually getting to know them better with every little mission you had to go through by their side.

Obviously, after that, Javier never said anything to Murphy or anyone at the office. But you could tell he had his quiet ways to protect you of posible risks and dangerous things, result of the expeditions you were assigned to make with them. Like for example, always positioning himself in-front of you, covering you like some sort of shield. And if Murphy goes first, he covers your back. Or the way he explains everything to you in the car before facing the situation. Like, who are you probably going to face, what to do if actual danger happens and how he’ll act if you get blocked or fail a step of the plan. He knew that has happened to you very often in the past, with cases you were really nervous about. Sometimes he kinda over dones himself and that has lead to small fights between you the two of you. You don’t like to feel fragile, and his silly methods of protection create that illusion in your head. It feels like you need to ask for his permission to make the next step. But he’s aware of your abilities. And most of the time, him and Murphy get really impress with your knowledge on the field.

The rest of the office also noticed that new closeness you both started growing. And that has also shape-shift the entire way some of them treat you. The guys stopped being such assholes and the jokes weren’t there anymore, at least not as often. You weren’t the ghost of the office anymore. They started to respect you and you could tell even some of them were a little intimidating by your presence. It bothered you that it took two other men’s approval for them to consider you somebody worth of respect. But that, unfortunately, was a common thing on a job like this. Some of the girls, on the other side, were a little jealous. And the ones that weren’t used you as some sort of source of information to get to Javier’s dating life or biography. Many questions were asked: “Is he seeing someone?” “What is he like?” “Does he treat you right?” “Do you find him attractive?” “Is he as committed in his job as he is at…you know”. Hello? Most of them you didn’t have the answer for. I mean, you barely even knew the man apart from the big rumors and his nicotine addiction. And somehow he knew how to keep those details in private to keep that mysterious aura surrounding him. It kinda made you sick to your stomach.

But you liked the fact that you didn’t know shit. You did not want to get your hopes down. At the end of the day, the man was nice to you. Polite. Not as nice as Murphy but he played the part. The same Murphy that greeted you at your arrival and shoved at you a copy of the newspaper, for you to read the most recent story about Escobar’s up to not good actions.

“Are you ready for another expedition, Gomez? Don’t worry, this time you’re staying in the car so we won’t have to act like your personal bodyguards, again” he joked with a side smile staring at you with his shiny blue eyes.

He always managed to noticed. And that made you a little nervous for some reason.

“Very funny, Murphy. Dismissing my job, again” you continued with the joke “I was expecting more of you, to be honest, I thought you weren’t like the rest” you crossed your legs in a seductive way, along with your arms.

“Oh, come on, baby. You know I’m better than these pricks” he gestured towards the other guys at the office who used do the same to you just weeks ago.

“Hey, Murphy, quit it” said one of the agents from their desks.

You and Murphy exchanged a smile and Peña was the next to show up in the room. Causing his obvious effect.

“Well, look who’s surprisingly showing early after another fun night” mention the same agent from before as Peña approached.

“Morning” he said to you in a calm tone, he did the same to Murphy and completely ignored the dude.

“What do you think about having such a life of the party as a partner, miss Gomez?”

Of course you were the one the question was directed to. You debated internally if answering was a good idea, ignoring it sounded appealing.

But your ego was stonger.

“Honestly? I don’t really give a fuck, Henry” you responded looking behind you to the subject’s eyes “I just focus on my job, unlike you.”

The room went silent except for Murphy’s big laugh. And Javier looked at you with a smirk on his mouth while sitting down on his chair.

“Yeah you should work on that, Henry” reassured between laughs another agent in the room.

Javier couldn’t help but laugh a little too and Murphy quickly joined him again. You started fake reading the newspaper, avoiding their stares but they couldn’t take them away from you.

“Could you not? I’m reading.”

They both rapidly went back to focus on the papers in their desks and murmured a funny ‘sorry’ trying really hard to contain their laughter.

They wouldn’t shut up about it for the whole day, and you knew.

—

The sound of a phone ringing started to smash the back of your head, feeling even more prominent by the second. You adjusted your eyes to the darkness of the room and lifted one arm trying really hard to reach the switch from the closest lamp next to your bed.

“¿Hola?” you answered in almost a whisper with the thought of it maybe being your mom, who still didn’t fully control the timezone of Colombia.

“Gomez.”Murphy answered in his American accent and that woke you up entirely “Sorry to wake you. Something happened, I need you here as fast as you can…” he explained in an anxious tone “I don’t know who else to call.”

“What? What happened?” you stood up quickly from the bed, causing you to blackout a little from the speed “Where’s Javier?”

“Just be fast, okay?” he hanged up after that.

Still feeling like in a dream state. You rapidly got ready and approached the location Murphy told you. The taxi dropped you off in the same exact building you three were, two weeks ago to be exact, following one of Escobar’s man. And it suddenly hit you as you hit the car’s door to close it. Javier wasn’t there, just Murphy and Carillo, waiting outside the car, two meters away from the building. Talking. Almost screaming to each other.

You approached them and Murphy immediately went to you. But he didn’t say anything.

“What’s going on?”

You looked at him trying to find an answer, both agents couldn’t take their eyes of the ground.

“Is it Peña? It’s Peña, right?” Murphy ran his hands through his hair “Murphy!” you insisted in desperation.

“He fucked it up big this time” Carillo was the one to talk first. He looked really pissed and that almost took your breath away.

What the fuck did he do this time.

“Is he inside?” you tried again with Murphy, searching for his eyes. He looked like he was in some sort of trance and that made you even more nervous “Murphy! What the heck is wrong with you?!”

“Yes” Carillo talked for him again.

“They have him” Murphy finally gain the strength to talk “Escobar’s men.”

You couldn’t help but close your eyes and sigh.

“This motherfucker…” you murmured “What did he do? How the fuck is he inside?!”

You knew that wasn’t accidental. Nothing about Javier Peña seemed to be. He clearly put himself in that position and all of you knew that. What shocked you was that, he actually got caught this time. The DEA was gonna murder you if they found out. Worst. You could definitely get fired. That’s probably why you three were the only people there.

“Who called you?” you asked Carillo this time. You knew somebody have had to warned them about this. Some of the men Carrillo worked with had direct contact with these bastards. They probably called asking about some sort of reward in exchange for the information. That’s how fucked up everything was.

“They did” you took a step back “they say they’re willing to…negotiate.”

“We’re not doing that.”

“Gomez…” called you out Murphy.

“We’re not doing that! We could get fired. We’re entering this building and we’re getting him out of there. Like we were taught.”

“Well that’s a beautiful speech. But we can’t. We don’t have the resources. We couldn’t even go after that motherfucker that day, there’s no way we’re entering that building with who knows how many armed men inside and hookers.” Murphy was fast at pinching your bubble.

“Hookers?! There’s hookers inside?!”

So the rumors were true. Oh, this motherfucker was unbelievable.

“Yes, hookers. It’s Peña we’re talking about, of course there’s freaking hookers inside” responded Carillo with a furious tone “or should I say, informants.”

“We need to call the office, get back up, we cou-”

You cut Murphy off before he could continued spilling what sounded like bullshit to you out of his mouth.

“We are not doing that” you repeated firmly “I’m not gonna lose my job because you two, bastards, can’t keep it in your pants and do what you’re told to” Murphy looked at you with guilt in his eyes.

You took your gun out of the inside of your jacket and charged it.

“We’re getting in.”

Neither Carillo or Murphy had a clue of what got into you, to actually wanna risks your life for someone like Javier. But you knew it wasn’t entirely about honor, but more about pride. He wasn’t protecting you this time. It was your turn to actually act like the agent you always wanted to be. Like that role was actually yours. Start acting up. Over doing it if it was necessary.

“I don’t know, Gomez. Let’s think about this.”

“You’re being such a pussy right now, Murphy” you quoted him to him, earning a sight from the man “Carrillo” you called.

Carrillo looked at you firmly.

“Are you in?” you asked hopeful.

Carrillo looked at Murphy and then at you. And sighed.

“Yes.”

“Then cover my back” you said getting close to the entrance of the building. You turned your head towards Murphy “He’s never going to forgive you about this.”

You really didn’t want to say that to him. But you played all your cards in order to make him change his mind. You knew you were gonna need all the help you could get. You and Carrillo entered the building that looked like some sort of hotel. There was nobody there except for the receptionist who quickly gasped at you the second she spotted the guns you were holding.

“DEA” you explained, showing her your plaque and pressing one finger over your lips, indicating her to stay quiet.

She obeyed and kept silence. She didn’t look dangerous at all, you felt really sorry so many innocent people were involved in this bullshit. Slowly you turn into the stairs, making sure the coast was clear and gestured Carrillo to follow you up into the first floor of rooms.

“He’s really lucky to have you” whispered Carrillo referring to Peña in a sarcastic tone.

“If we get out of this, I’m changing partners.”

He tried not to laugh while following you down the corridor. You arrived to the first door, pressing your back to the wall, focusing on any sort of sound coming out of it. You didn’t hear anything. Before reaching for the doorknob, you noticed a thin thread of blood flowing out the room by the end of the door.

You swallowed. Suddenly the shaking of your hands became present.

“You want me to��?” started Carrillo noticing you were not moving.

“It’s okay.”

You opened the door slowly.

A body was laying next to the bed, mattress and sheets covered in red. A long browned haired and fully naked woman was lying on the ground. You rapidly got on your knees and checked her pulse. None.

“She’s dead.”

Your body was starting to lose the confidence of earlier. And it was starting to get hard to focus on your breath and ignoring the lack of oxygen entering your lungs. You freaking hated Peña for putting you through this. For putting this woman through this. For putting Carrillo through this and every single one of you. This wasn’t professional or brave of him. This was the most selfish act you’ve ever seen. Maybe he really was an asshole. Maybe he really didn’t deserve your respect. Maybe he didn’t deserve to be rescued.

“Gomez?” Carrillo called your name from the doorframe “Y/n” he repeated until you focused on him “I heard something, on the last room down the hall”.

You got out of the room trying really hard to not look back at the woman’s face. You focused on the noise. Sounded like someone complaining, someone wounded. A small ‘fuck’ coming out in a whisper.

“It’s him” you both said at the same time.

“Wait” Carrillo stopped you “let me go first.”

You looked at him with one eyebrow lifted.

“You’re loosing it, if he’s surrounded we gotta be quick” he explained.

“Shut up” you didn’t listen and walked past him, holding up your gun.

If someone had to accidentally shoot him, it was going to be you.

You two walked slowly making sure that if someone else was in the room with him, they wouldn’t hear you two coming. Once you were close you got ready, hands firmed on the gun, you looked at Carillo behind you and nodded.

One. Two. Three.

You two pointed with the gun at the inside of the room. Javier was tied, both hands and ankles next to the window close to the bed. Sitting down on the floor looking tiredly at you. He’s hair was messy and he had a black eye, along with some wounds on his neck. Blood dripping from his lip.

He had never look more defenseless. And suddenly your anger was replaced with concern.

“Gomez?” he spoke softly.

You couldn’t bring yourself to answer.

“The coast is clear. There’s nobody in the room” mention Carrillo coming out of the bathroom.

You dropped to your knees, next to him. Untying him in a fast way. He murmured some words to you but you weren’t able to hear any of them. You called Carrillo and asked him to help you. Javier kept talking to you but you didn’t answer any of his questions, so he eventually gave up trying. It was like you were in automatic mode. You both dragged him out of that place, gaining some looks from the previous and still, traumatized, receptionist. And met Murphy waiting for you at the entrance, holding up his gun. Once he saw you, he quickly ran to the car to get it closer to where you were. You rested Javier on the passenger’s seat, and you joined Carrillo on the backseat.

Nobody talked on your way to the hospital. Neither of you could believe what just happened.

—

“He wants to see you” Murphy joined you in the waiting room. Thirty minutes passed before they finally let someone visit him.

“Is he okay?” you asked without looking at him.

“Yeah, he had some wounds on his chest but he was smart enough to wear his bulletproof vest so, he’ll be okay. The black eye though, looks gross.”

“Then I’m going home” you finally spoke standing up.

“Oh, come on, Gomez. You saved his ass.”

“I don’t need flattery. I need some sleep.”

Murphy stopped you, grabbing you by your shoulder.

“Look, he is in fact an asshole…but he was really worried. And I think he feels really bad” you rolled your eyes “If you talk to him, he might actually let you punch him in the other eye.”

—

Javier was sitting down on the hospital bed, neck and chest cover with bandages under his blood stained shirt that was wide open. A swollen eye and puppy stare redirected towards you, while you entered the place. It felt almost illegal to see him like this. So vulnerable, so far away from his tough image. The image he tried to implant in everyone’s mind. The image of a smart man. He looked more broken that smart. And still he managed to stand up.

“You good?” he asked like the last time he saw you cry after your mom’s call. A question that maybe you should be asking him instead.

“You look like shit” you spilled instead. Because before anything, you were mad at him.

He smirked a little “Well, you can’t always look like a heartthrob.”

You didn’t react to his comment.

“I’m so-”

“So are you gonna still renting hookers after this?”

He froze. He looked at you making sure that those words did actually left your mouth.

“It’s not what you think” he stated “and besides I don’t think is none of your business If I do.”

You were starting to regret entering that room.

“It is when it risks lives.”

He looked down.

“I wasn’t trying to risks any lives. I was trying to helped her.”

You chuckled.

“You want a medal, Peña?”

“I’m being serious. What’s wrong with you?”

“What’s wrong with me?! What’s wrong with you?! You fucking idiot. You almost got us fired!” you exploited “When are you gonna start learning to cooperate, Peña? When are you gonna be responsible about your position?”

He sat back on the bed.

“You’re alive because of me. Because nobody wanted to enter that building, not even Murphy, let alone Carrillo. And I get it, I really get it, you don’t deserve someone risking their lives over you.”

He could tell that it was not only anger that was coming out if you, but raw honesty. Disappointment. He was used to causing that effect on people. He was the best at that. But he really hoped he wouldn’t cause that on you too.

So he really tried to change it.

“I’m sorry. But it’s really not what you think” he didn’t give up “She is one of my informants.”

You rolled your eyes remembering Carrillo’s words from before.

“Joder…I swear. I was there to rescued her, she called me. I know this woman. She’s a friend.”

“Oh yeah, a 'friend'. You frequent a lot of those.”

“She gave us the location of one of Escobar’s man.”

Your eyes widened.

“Did Murphy knew?” you asked containing your desires to strangle him.

“Of course not.” he answered whining a little from his position “But they did.”

Your hands flew immediately to your face.

“I was the only resource she had, so she call me & I came and I don’t regret it.”

You took a step back, your back facing him this time. You really couldn’t look at him right now. You kept thinking, in some way, that woman died thanks to you. Thanks to him. He felt the same way. And in the process of trying to stop that from happening, he almost got himself killed. Along with the rest of you.

“You’re unbelievable” your murmured, facing him “You put the princess at risks and then you go and rescue her. That’s how it works for you.”

“Well, sometimes it’s the only way.”

“Did you know you’re a part of the problem? You’re paying for the same service, abusing the same power. The only difference is that they are fucking narcos and you’re a fucking cop. You should do the right thing, shouldn’t you?”

He stood up, angry. Getting closer to you. Mentioning his job, it felt like a personal thing now.You knew how to push the right buttons to piss him off. And like he taught you, you acted up, pushed them harder.

“What are you gonna do? Treat me like one of your whores?”

He stoped himself.

“You don’t know shit” he spat furious. Almost not vocalizing the words.

“I respected you” you ended “I thought it was mutual.” you got ready to leave him alone, before closing the door, you checked on him one last time “By the way, you failed. She’s dead.”

[sunshinebingo]

@gwynrielweeksofficial Day 10 - AU Day

The Neighbour's Cat

I love when we get the Shadows’ input in Azriel’s POVs and for this one, I tried to do that but with Gwyn.

Synopsis: Gwyn finds a cat in her backyard and decides to meet its owner.

Word Count: 1.4k

Read on Ao3

"Are you sure you don’t need help unpacking?” Nesta asked for the thousandth time.

“I’m sure Nes,” Gwyn sighed and replied for the thousandth time. “I’m almost done anyways.”

“Wow Gwyn you’re fast.” She has been unpacking since the last box has been dropped that morning. It was now almost evening and she desperately needed a break. And that is why she had called Nesta. Emerie would have also been on the line with them if she wasn’t still at work.

“Well unlike you I don’t have a gorgeous boyfriend to keep me distracted,” Gwyn tried to say it without the slight longing that she felt at the thought. Gwyn was more than happy for Nesta. She felt the same for Emerie who was currently dating Cassian’s cousin. But she couldn’t help but feel a little left out sometimes. Not by her chosen sisters. She could never resent them for having what she did not.

Gwyn felt like whatever mystical being responsible for pairing people had somehow forgotten her. She was fine by her own. But whenever she saw happy couples being in love and acting all cute, she couldn’t help but wonder whether she would be happier with someone else in her life.

‘’Gwyn? You still there?’’ Gwyn realised then that she had been lost in her thoughts and thus completely ignoring Nesta.

‘’Huh? Yeah I’m listening,’’ she blurted out.

‘’What was I saying then?’’ Nesta teased.

‘’Something about Cassian?’’ Gwyn tried. Nesta only laughed and the conversation moved to the planning of the next girls’ night which would be held at Gwyn’s new house. When Nesta hang up, Gwyn was so tired that she did not feel like cooking. She plopped down on the couch and looked for something to order online.

As she debated with herself over sushi and tacos, a little meow from the garden caught her attention. When she heard it again, Gwyn leapt from the couch to investigate. She has always been fond of animals. But, unfortunately, none of her previous apartments allowed her to adopt one. That has been part of the reasons why she had gone for a small house this time. This, and the fact that, after almost a year spent in the middle of the city, Gwyn craved some quiet.

Gwyn heard a rustling sound coming from a bush near the wall that separated her house with her neighbour’s. A fluffy black cat with a pair of bright green eyes walked from under the bush and meowed at her. Gwyn’s heart melted when the cat walked and rubbed itself against her legs as if she hasn’t just moved here this morning. She knelt on the grass to pet the cat and it immediately started purring.

“I didn’t know the house came with a friend,” Gwyn said to him as she scratched his fluffy head. “Hi little guy.”

Forgetting about the food that she had to order, Gwyn spent the next half hour in her new backyard playing with her new friend. When the sun was almost set, she heard the sound of a bike from the neighbour’s side of the wall. A few minutes later she heard voices.

‘’Grumpy,’’ a deep voice called. Gwyn noticed the cat’s ear twitching. ‘’Grumpy, where are you boy?’’ the voice called louder this time. The cat moved his head in the direction of the voice.

‘’Are you Grumpy?’’ Gwyn asked the cat. It would be weird if Grumpy was a child, a little voice in her head said. She had her answer when the voice called again and the cat started meowing in response. ‘’That must be your dad looking for you then.’’ The more she listened to that voice, the more Gwyn noticed how sexy it sounded, even if he was only looking for an animal named Grumpy, who, by the way, wasn’t grumpy at all. She wondered if her neighbour looked as hot as he sounded. She had heard the bike so she assumed he must be at least a little attractive, right? In books men on bikes are always hot. You’re not in a book Gwyn, the little voice reminded her. Maybe the man was married and Gwyn was fantasizing about someone who had a gorgeous wife, 3 kids and a cat. Or, the little voice added with a gasp, what if he is super hot and gay?

Gwyn looked at Grumpy who wasn’t grumpy. The cat kept meowing but made no move to leave. ‘’You don’t want to go back?’’

‘’Come here boy, it’s time for dinner,’’ the neighbour said. Gwyn looked at Grumpy and an idea popped into her head. The only way for her to find out what her neighbor with the sexy voice looked like and if he was married or gay was to meet him. And since he seemed to have lost his cat, I would help him find it, she thought. This was not hard at all since the lost cat had befriended her already.

Gwyn stood up and adjusted her shorts and t-shirt. ‘’Let’s go meet your dad Grumpy,’’ she told the cat as she grabbed him and walked to the front door. Let’s hope your dad is hot Grumpy is also what she thought but didn’t say. She walked the stone path leading to his porch and knocked on the door. Grumpy was cradled in her arms like a baby.

When the owner of the house opened the door, Gwyn almost dropped his cat. But the only thing that dropped was her jaw. One look at him and Gwyn prayed that he was not married or gay.

“Grumpy,” he exclaimed, pulling Gwyn out of her prayers to every gods that she remembered the name of.

“Uh…hi…um…I found your cat,” Gwyn moved a very comfortable Grumpy from her arms and handed him to his owner. Gwyn followed the strong muscles of his arms when he reached out to grab the cat. When his large hands touched hers as Grumpy moved from her arms to his, Gwyn thought she could develop a hand fetish just from the thought of his hand tracing her body.

“Thank you so much for bringing him back to me. I was just looking for him,” he told her with a warm smile.

Gwyn pulled herself together and smiled back. “Actually I heard you. I’m your new neighbour.”

“Oh,” he raised his brows at her. Then he beamed at Gwyn. “Welcome then. I’m Azriel.”

Even your name is hot, Gwyn wanted to say. But instead she thanked him and introduced herself. Grumpy jumped off Azriel’s arms. Gwyn giggled when he plopped down next to her and started licking his paw. “You have a very cuddly cat,” she told Azriel.

Azriel snickered. “He has never acted like that with anyone but me. It is actually one of my brothers who named him Grumpy because he is so mean to others.”

“Well he hasn’t been mean to me,” Gwyn shrugged. She found it very easy to relax around him.

“You must be very special then,” he grinned. Gwyn blushed and bit her lip. Am I delusional or is he looking at my lips?, she asked herself. You are talking to yourself while this god is standing in front of you. You're clearly delusional, the little voice, which was clearly her own, replied. She wanted to cover her face so he wouldn’t see how red she was turning.

Azriel cleared his throat and when he spoke, Gwyn thought that he sounded a bit nervous. “Can I offer you dinner sometime? Tonight perhaps?” Gwyn felt her heart beating in her throat. She felt like she was about to either faint or fly at the proposition. Is this a date or is he just trying to thank me? she thought. Who even cares? Just say yes. “Your boyfriend can join us too of course,” Azriel added.

“I don’t have a boyfriend,” Gwyn added a bit too quickly.

Azriel smirked. “Great.” Gwyn raised a brow at him. Did he just say great? “I mean there’ll be more food for us then,” he shrugged. Gwyn laughed. Maybe her prayers had worked after all.

“I have nothing planned right now so I can help you if you want,” she told him, feeling slightly more confident.

“Even better,” Azriel stepped back and gestured for Gwyn to come in. Grumpy followed them inside the house. As Azriel closed the door behind them, Gwyn looked at Grumpy as if expecting him to read her mind. Have you been playing matchmaker all along? When the cat meowed at her, Gwyn decided to take that as a yes.

[miss-menhera]

i feel like a better way to heal from your mental struggles isn’t embracing toxic behavior from men. I think doing research on mental health skills and ways to cope with the sort of things you’ve gone through will be more helpful. i think traumacore is good short term for helping to find community and to have an outlet for trauma, but having it be the only solution to mental heath things you’re going through isn’t how you get better. It’s like someone writing poetry about their depression is a good outlet, but not a one time solution to the struggles depression brings.

embracing abusive behavior from men, even if its done with the goal of healing in mind, isn’t going to work. You may be desensitizing yourself to bad behavior.

I would recommend doing research on gender roles and how it makes women think they need to act a certain way to appeal to men, how gender roles apply to how women and men are expected to act during intimacy (tee noir does great videos on this), doing research on educational sites such as planned parenthood, and going into spaces where people discuss their attraction to male characters in an healthy way.

if you like abrasive men, i recommend spamton from delatrune, grunkle stan from gravity falls, or peter vincent from the movie fright knight. Many of these men have fanbases that don’t revolve around how they treat people badly, or how women can submit to them sexually, but are about how attractive people find them as characters.

Crowley from good omens isn’t a man, but he is also a more self confident character that is a great example of someone who doesn’t treat women badly and still has that bad boy appeal.

Thanks for the nice suggestions and for the time you took to write this to me, I am mostly aware of these things but the thing is I am way too far gone for advice or therapy. I'm on 3 different type of meds everyday, I'm a schizophrenic girlfailure, but the only way for me to live without my heart being desert and hollow is by making it hurt and abusing it. And that's something very unfortunate yet very true that I've been dealing with for the past 5 years, I know I'm worth more than being a playtoy to be tossed around, but my heart doesn't know. And everytime one of my outlets escapes me, my heart feels heavy and the pain is so excruciating I start hearing voices in my brain just telling me I'm a whore. And that's something no medication has taken away, and something I don't wanna speak about in my daily life. Existing for men gives me value and purpose I otherwise don't feel like I have.

As for fictional characters my taste in men is not bad boys but more like eldritch horrors who have no regard for me. Such as Michael Myers, Adam from hazbin hotel, Sukuna from JJK, Valentino from Hazbin Hotel or characters of that caliber. Anything less extreme than that is a no-go for me. I have no other way to cope with this pain other than self harm.

[samanthaandlife]

Life with Aiden: As I have mentioned below, I was in bliss and I think he was too! Unfortunately for me, I couldn’t see the brainwashing, gaslighting, manipulation taking place. Yes, we had a beautiful time the Christmas we spent in Paris and yes, he took me to London for an early birthday present. And I surly was a willing participant I just wished I had known he didn’t want my heart he demanded obedience. For all of my more recent criticisms towards submission of women to men, I had never felt more feminine than I had being a kept woman. I didn’t once mind doing things that made him happy, no matter how degrading some of the acts were. I kinda liked it, submitting to him and letting him make the decisions for the two of us. I trusted him so much, I give him ownership over myself and almost legally, but I didn’t fully trust him by that point. It was Sally that finally pointed out how isolated he was keeping me. We weren’t welcome as a couple to the group but Aiden was always welcome without me! That second year, while I was doing my student teaching and all of my focus and energy was devoted to that, he returned to the group as a regular! He never allowed me to out with my colleagues for drinks after work, even when we finished, but he was out all night, sometimes, fucking other women!!! I wanted to believe his lies but Sally got my head back on and we formed a plan, like she had!

Graduation was near and all the talk was what’s next? Aiden had been given a position within his father’s business. All he had had to do was graduate and he was destined to become very wealthy! All I had to do was to marry him, sign a prenup and sign a document of submission and I too would be wealthy by proxy. The position was in Cairo Egypt so naturally I was also going to have to wear a Hijab publicly. If this had happened a year earlier, this girl would be journaling from under the pyramids! I feel so lucky to have escaped, and reasonably in tact! I decided the easiest thing to do was to follow Sally’s advice and get caught sleeping with Darnell, or someone else of my choosing. Darnell was a good choice because I really didn’t like him, he was attractive but we just never got along. He was respectful but rarely spoke to me. I would catch him looking at me was want in his eyes, I knew all I had to do was spread my legs and he would forget all about his friendship. Darnell is a pig, he is a player, so convincing him to sleep with me was easy.

Once student teaching was over, I not only had I got my time back but I could also be in the apartment in the middle of the morning. Aiden comes home at 10, following his workout and goes immediately into the bathroom. Once he’s finished with his shower he goes downstairs for something to eat. Darnell typically leaves his door partially open, if not open, most of the time. He likes being caught in the act, far too many times to remember seeing him fucking someone on his bed. Entering or leaving Aiden’s bedroom you have to walk past Darnell’s room so all I had to do was wait. I was in the kitchen when Aiden came home, I waited until I heard the water before going upstairs. I had on nothing but a sheer robe when I entered his bedroom, he was playing a video game with his headphones on, so he never heard or saw me. Leaving the door fully open, I crawled along the floor until I got next to him. He was wearing nothing but shorts so when I reached for him the shock and surprise was fun to watch but when I grabbed his cock and started to play with it his face filled with a new expression of lust and desire. He sat up and helped me pull down his shorts before sitting back down and allowing me to take him in my mouth. I have tried to put the rest of what happened out of my mind, so I don’t need to relive it now, but my plan worked! Aiden caught him deep into me when the yelling and fighting started. I hadn’t anticipated that an actual fight would happen but it did! I was so scared, tying to get out of the room without getting hit myself. I remember screaming and crying while sitting naked on the floor out in the hallway begging them to stop. Darnell’s room was trashed when Aiden came out of the room, bloody nose and his eyes both looked swollen, he spit blood out at me and called me a whore and he never wanted to see me again! When I heard the front door close and his car start, I check on Darnell. He had a big puffy lower lip, some bruising on his chest but otherwise not bleeding.

I apologized to Darnell for involving him in my plan and not asking or telling him first. Such a guy, he found it to be a great story and he got to have sex, so he was all good! Men!! Pigs!!

Okay, I got through it!! Now, let the healing begin!

[gunslinginnhogtyin]

"Don't chase the rabbit.”

Send me "Don't chase the rabbit" and your muse will be shown a random memory from my muse's past. // @werexcat

Being a couple of outlaws, it wasn’t uncommon for Butch and Darlene to find themselves in all sorts of trouble, especially considering the fact that Darlene was a witch, an attribute that seemed to attract otherworldly outsiders and dark magic.

This time however, they had walked right into the belly of the beast with a plan mapped out. They had snuck aboard self proclaimed Pirate Queen Bonaccorso’s ship in hopes of locating a specific cursed item they had suspicions she was harboring. Bonnie was seemingly unaware of its magic, having a nasty habit of hoarding treasure of all kinds just for the hell of it. If it was shiny and looked valuable, she made it hers!

Upon entering the ship through an open porthole, the twosome quietly sneak about the ship, Darlene muttering something about their plan before they’re abruptly cornered by three pirates, presumably apart of Bonnie’s crew. Darlene acts quickly, knocking the three pirates off of their feet with a blast of purple magic; she hops over the heap of men and Butch follows suit as they race down the hall and down some stairs below the deck in search of the treasure room. Darlene could feel the room pulsing with magic so it was easy to pinpoint where on the ship it was located.

When they finally come to the door, Butch jiggles the knob to find that it’s locked. He’s not ready to give up just yet though, removing one of his guns from its holster and blasting the knob a good few times until it’s a busted piece of metal hanging from the door. Then, he pushes his way inside, Darlene looking less than pleased with the display considering the attention it could have attracted.

The room is HUGE on the inside, baring piles and piles of sparkling gold and treasure. Chests sat about randomly, colorful jewels and bright diamonds sticking out amongst the gold. The room was quiet, almost too quiet…

“Next time, use your lock picking skills, yeah? The whole ship probably heard that racket.”

“It’s called makin’ an entrance, Dar. Relax.”

Darlene takes a deep breath to calm herself, huffing out some air afterwards. “Butch, hon, I need this, okay? It’s for my book… my life’s work. This could be…the breakthrough I’ve been looking for.”

Butch’s teasing smile had long disappeared, the urgency in his partners voice seeming to relay how important this was to her. With a quiet nod, the cowboy begins to dig in a nearby pile in search of the object despite not knowing what exactly it was supposed to look like. Some of the gold he pockets as he goes about searching and Darlene takes to doing the same, searching in a pile of jewels she had been drawn to.

A little digging and she comes upon a diamond studded glass dragon statuette, a seal plastered across its chest. It was practically seeping with magic. As she snatches it though, it seems heavy for some reason… giving it a pull she finds another being attached to it; buried in her own treasure, seemingly awaiting the twos arrival, a red haired woman grins maliciously up at Darlene with jagged teeth, a golden one standing out among the others. With a startled gasp, the witch takes a few steps back as Bonnie rises from the gold she was buried beneath.

“Looking for this, ay~? I should’ve known yew punks’d try n’ steal me treasure!” The pirate barks, the sound of gold coins and jewels shifting and clinking against the wooden floor boards as she steps out of the pile. “I ain’t got no mercy fer thieves!”

Almost immediately, with determination in his eyes, Butch tosses that lasso of his, his rope tightening around the treasure in her hands and he gives it a yank! Unfortunately, he’s unable to catch it time and it crashes into the floor, shattering upon impact and some sort of dark smoke escapes its confines and seems to evaporate into thin air. Holding up the rope now, a shard of glass dangles pathetically as Butch stares at it, gritting his teeth. Shit.

Darlene and Bonnie both gasp at this, the witch giving Butch a punch on the back of the head.

“S-Sorry—I just… I was tryna help…” Butch grumbles, rubbing the back of his head sheepishly.

“Sorry doesn’t cut it! Do you know how valuable that was going to be for my work!? Ugh! Sometimes I think—…. I don’t NEED your help!” The witch snaps maybe a bit too viciously, earning a pathetic look from Butch.

“…As enjoyable as it is t’ watch ya kick yer pet around an’ all, I do believe those hands of yers belong to me, filthy thief!” With a snarl, Bonnie appears to begin transforming into a beast—a dragon.

“Find somethin’ valuable and let’s get the hell outta here!” Butch shouts above the dragons growling, and the both of them take to racing around the room, filling their pockets with whatever they can get their hands on. Bonnie breathes a wall of fire that Butch narrowly manages to avoid and Darlene uses a blast of magic to knock the dragon off balance before grabbing Butch’s wrist and racing out of the room.

A wretched scream of frustration escapes the beast as she loses sight of her prey, “You always were a COWARD, Darlene! It’s just like you t’RUN!”

They’re almost cornered by another wall of Bonnie’s henchman but after taking a detour down one of the many hallways, she manages to locate the porthole they had snuck in through and makes her escape, flopping into the sea below with flailing arms. Butch follows suit, nearly losing his hat in the process.

“Well that was a disaster…”

“Yeah, thanks to you!” Darlene splashes her counterpart with water before turning her body and beginning to swim her way to shore. The cowboy shields his face but follows shortly after, keeping some distance between them since she was clearly seething.

“Listen, Darlene… I… I didn’t do it on purpose.” The witch remains silent, staring ahead, the only sounds that could be heard being the waves in the water and the distant screeching from Bonnie’s ship as they grow further away from their closest call yet.

“I mean. I did, but It wasn’t s’posed t’hit th’ ground. I just—“

“But it DID, Butch. If you didn’t act so recklessly all the time, I would be—…” A heavy sigh follows her words as she trails off. Nothing else is said between them as they reach land, the witch taking to wringing out her hair and then her clothes. Butch does the same.

…………….

[funnywormz]

putting some red dwarf headcanons below the cut bc im feeling kinda crappy and just wanna talk abt them.

please keep in mind that these are my readings of the characters and im in no way trying to claim these things are canon or the "correct" way of interpreting them, this is just how i see them personally. a lot of this is just rlly self-indulgent and involves me Projecting. if you don't agree with me on any/all of these, that's fine, i don't expect anyone to be on board with all of them tbh, just pls be nice to be abt it im sensitive

also just a warning. this post got very long bc i have a Lot to say lol

lister

gender: trans man, he/they

sexuality: bisexual

other: adhd (inattentive type), depression, amputee with prosthetic arm

notes: i headcanon lister as a trans man bc im trans masc myself and i find it very comforting to see him that way. it also fits in well with some aspects of canon, like his pregnancy in season 2. he's also just trans masc swag personified lol.

the bisexual headcanon seems to be shared by a lot of ppl in the fandom, and it's personally the way i see him. i think he has a definite preference for women but is still occasionally attracted to men, and (i am pretending that one scene in series 7 doesn't exist here lol 😒) i don't think he'd be repressed abt it at all. he's horny and not afraid to act on it

in terms of the neurodivergent stuff, i think adhd-i fits with his personality pretty well. i think that combined with his tendency to be depressed makes it hard for him to stay motivated and focused, and often means that he doesn't rlly take care of himself or his personal hygiene and seeks out short-term sources of pleasure like food, video games, alcohol and sex to keep himself happy, but can't rlly focus on long term goals. being the last human alive stuck in deep space definitely doesn't help. often his "laziness" is a result of his lack of energy and motivation rather than being an intentional thing. some days he just spend all of his time curled up on his bunk sleeping bc he can't find the drive to do anything else. he doesn't rlly WANT to be that way, he wants to have fun and actually do things, but it doesn't always happen and he has some rlly bad days at times.

with the prosthetic arm, personally i think they should've given him a prosthetic and had a proper character arc around him learning to cope with a disability back in season 7/8, rather than playing it off as a joke and immediately retconning it. i haven't rlly done much planning for this one yet but i just know i want it to be a thing. i think he would probably have a dope looking robot arm or something bc there's no way he'd just go for a boring generic arm if he had the choice imo. he would love to deck it out and customise it and put stickers all over it despite kryten telling him not to hehe

rimmer

gender: mostly cis man but maybe with a little hint of nonbinary-ness in there that he unfortunately refuses to acknowledge. he/him

sexuality: h for homosexual BABEY!!!!!!

other: autism, adhd (hyperactive), panic disorder, generalised anxiety disorder

notes: i think that it's quite possible that rimmer could have a little bit of gender stuff going on. when he projects his own insecurities abt gender and sexuality onto ace he specifically makes jabs abt ace probably wearing women's clothes in secret multiple times, which is equally as telling as his sniping abt ace being gay.

i also do headcanon rimmer as gay, but deeply, deeply repressed about it. he pursues women and kinda forces himself to believe he's attracted to them, but it's out of his desire to meet his own stupid arbitrary expectations of what he "should" be like, rather than out of any genuine attraction. ik a lot of ppl see him as bi, which is perfectly valid! but personally his pursuits of women read to me as something he does bc he feels he needs to do it to complete his image rather than something he does out of any real desire. he's also got enough internalised homophobia that it'd probably take decades of therapy to make him be normal abt it lol. rimmer wants to be the kind of man that he thinks will receive respect and will meet the expectations his family put on him as a child, and having a wife and children was always part of that image for him. he never really stopped to consider if that's something he actually wanted. i think he becomes more accepting of his own queerness as time goes on, but it does take time.

the neurodivergent stuff should be pretty self explanatory but im gonna rant abt it anyways. as an autistic person myself, i find rimmer very relatable. there are multiple scenes in the series where jokes and sarcasm go over his head completely, and countless times where he misreads body language and doesn't seem to get what kind of behaviour is appropriate for certain situations. he just seems to struggle with social interaction and bonding/making friends in general. he has intense interests that others don't rlly understand, like telegraph poles, risk, cars, morris dancing, etc. he gets pleasure out of organising and sorting things to a degree that seems pedantic to others, and seems genuinely confused when lister doesn't share his enthusiasm for cataloguing the ship's food stocks as a fun saturday night activity. he seems to enjoy routines and predictability, and gets upset when unexpected things happen. he also tends to get obsessive about small details rather than focusing on the big picture.

in terms of hyperactive adhd, it seems to me that rimmer often has a hard time slowing down and relaxing, and seems to need to be constantly on the go and doing things and generally fussing about. he also is self aware abt the fact that he has a hard time being quiet, and needs to talk more and at a faster pace than most other people, especially when he's nervous or distracted. as well as this, he often stims by rocking back and forth and jiggling his leg up and down (this also fits with the autism hc). he also has a tendency to procrastinate and seems to have a hard time studying, despite his attempts to convince people otherwise. it often comes up in the series that he'll get hyperfixated on doing something a bit arbitrary, like making an impeccable study timetable/schedule, or tidying, or sorting things into perfect order, rather than actually STUDYING, which is part of why he continuously fails his engineering exam.

the panic and anxiety disorder thing should be pretty self explanatory too. rimmer is clearly a worrier and has multiple panic attacks in the actual series. he seems to spend most of his time in a highly strung state of near panic, to the point where it interferes with his physical health. the way the canon narrative handles his anxiety, and his neurodivergent traits in general, is often a bit shitty lol, but it seems clear to me that he suffers from anxiety and panic attacks. kryten mentions that he's at a higher risk for those kinds of disorders due to genetics, but i also think that his childhood trauma and subsequent lifestyle (deathstyle??) definitely haven't helped him get any calmer lol

the cat

gender: trans man, he/him

sexuality: bisexual aromantic

other: autism

notes: most of these are more of a "because i said so" situation rather than things with canon evidence lol but still. esp the trans man one. i don't think the cat rlly has much of a concept of his own gender at all tbh, he just decided one day he was more comfortable as a man and stopped thinking abt it after that lol. i see the cat as bisexual bc i don't think he'd rlly give a fuck abt gender as long as ppl are hot and well presented, and i think he's aromantic bc throughout the series he doesn't seem to show much interest in a committed romantic relationship with anyone. when he does show interest in people, it reads more as purely sexual attraction to me than any desire to settle down or have an actual relationship.

i think he's autistic but it isn't always picked up bc his special interest is fashion, which isn't perceived to be a "typical" special interest. he seems very particular abt textures and colours, and puts meticulous effort into his wardrobe and often only wants to talk abt clothes even when ppl want to talk to him abt something else. to tie in with that, he doesn't seem great at reading social cues and often makes faux pas and accidentally insults others without realising it. he seems to generally have a hard time with empathy and understanding that others might not always share his interests and priorities

kryten

gender: nonbinary, any pronouns but generally uses he/him and is fine with this

sexuality: aroace

other: autism (again)

notes: ik that robots being nonbinary and aroace and autistic can be an unfortunate and frustrating stereotype sometimes, but it's just hard for me to see kryten any other way 😅. anyways, although im not aro or ace, i AM autistic and nonbinary and i think robots rule and i adore kryten so WHATEVER!!!! take it up with my nonexistent lawyer or something idc

in terms of being nb, kryten seems to only have the vaguest idea of what gender actually is, and i doubt that he really identifies as particularly male or female. he's most used to being perceived as male, but i don't think he really identifies with manhood. he seemed actively repulsed by male reproductive organs when he was briefly human, which makes me think that if he was human he'd probably suffer from gender dysphoria if he had to live in an amab body, but likewise he seems to have mixed feelings abt being perceived as a woman in season 8. in truth, i think he fits somewhere in the middle.

i see kryten as aroace bc he just never rlly seems to express any interest in sex or romance, even seeming confused by both concepts at different points. he IS a deeply loving and passionate and affectionate person at times imo, but it's always platonic i think. he just doesn't strike me as someone who would get any enjoyment or fulfilment out of having sex or being in a romantic relationship.

the autistic hc should once again be pretty obvious. he has a hard time reading social cues a lot of the time, and enjoys repetitive tasks that other ppl find boring, like ironing etc. he also just generally does and says things that strike others as eccentric without meaning to come across that way and jokes often go right over his head. he's autistic to me. ik that a lot of this is tied up with him being a mechanoid, but im autistic and i love kryten so im claiming him fuck you

kochanski

gender: trans woman, she/her

sexuality: lesbian

other: autism, generalised anxiety disorder

notes: ive seen a few ppl hc kochanski as a trans woman and i rlly warmed up to it. it also makes sense that lister would get a crush on her if he knew she was trans and they had "two of the only trans ppl on the dwarf" solidarity, like i can imagine it being part of why he came to like her tbh.

ik kochanski's statement abt her dave being gay and them just pretending to be in a relationship was immediately dismissed by lister and she didn't argue abt it, but i like to personally believe it's true. i think for a long time she struggled with internalised homophobia and didn't mind getting attention from men, esp bc it validated her gender as well. but in my headcanon it was always uncomfortable for her and never felt right, hence why she broke up with her lister before the accident (although the breakup was also in part due to her lister's struggles with his sexuality as well). much like with rimmer, i think kochanski had high expectations of herself and felt anxious for others to see her as a "real woman", and for a long time it was hard for her to reconcile being a lesbian with those expectations. but she gets there eventually.

at first i was on the fence abt headcanoning kochanski as being autistic, but i decided to do it. she's better at masking than rimmer is, but it still shows through in her very particular sensory preferences and attachment to comfort items and occasional misreading of social situations. likewise with generalised anxiety, i think she has a tendency to get anxious and worry abt things that other ppl might not care abt, and becomes stressed pretty easily. she tries her best to hide it, but she likes to be in control of a situation and know what all of the likely outcomes are, and when she can't have that level of control she finds it deeply upsetting and destabilising. she likes to have predictability and routine and takes comfort in familiar objects and sensations even when those things might seem silly or irrelevant to others.

holly

gender: nonbinary (imagine all of the computer related puns she could make abt this lol he would love it), any pronouns

sexuality: bisexual

other: n/a

notes: holly is so nonbinary to me. it's basically canon already considering that they switch back and forth between male and female presentation multiple times. i don't think gender means a hell of a lot to holly but she enjoys messing around with it and trying out new things. my personal headcanon is that she prefers presenting in more of a feminine way but the default presentation he's programmed with is masculine and she can't rlly be bothered changing it a lot of the time bc she doesn't rlly give a smeg.

likewise i think holly is attracted to men and women and everyone else. i don't think he feels sexual or romantic attraction that often but it definitely happens. they only ever really feel attraction to other ai though and aren't into organic beings in that way, and bc he hardly ever gets to encounter other ai her romantic life is kinda nonexistent lol.

i think holly probably has some Brain Stuff going on but idk what exactly so ive left that blank for now. if i come up with anything i will probably edit this later

OK THAT'S IT FOR NOW sorry this post is long as fuck. hope you guys enjoyed reading me ramble on abt the silly little fellows

[astramachina]

I saw your post about how in Thomas Sharpe's bio he was considered effeminate and not seeming particularly heterosexual. Do you think he has a complicated relationship with his potential attraction to men because he's also fearful of them due to his father's abuse? He wilts so easily around Edith's father. And Lucille is the one that "avenges" him.

I think Thomas Sharpe sits within a very unfortunate vortex of circumstances that would lead anyone to develop a myriad of complications when it comes to any sort of relationship-- father, sister, lover, you name it. Realistically, acting on any potential attraction towards men is automatically made almost impossible given the time Crimson Peak takes place . While capital punishment was no longer in the cards, "gross indecency" could still land a man in jail for a decade. And the Sharpes already had a reputation on paper, what with Lady Sharpe's gruesome death and all.

That being said, any kind of abuse leaves marks that linger. It's wholly up to interpretation if his father's particular brand of abuse somehow dissuaded Thomas from even considering looking at other men with genuine desire. Maybe it gave him serious daddy issues and made him thirst harder but there was just no space for him to even allow himself to explore that aspect of his sexuality due to everything else going on in his life. With, you know, the scamming, and the murder, and the sis banging.

As for Carter Cushing, I think it's more to do with him not being used to dealing with American men. (From a meta perspective, in regards to genre, you have that clear line between Carter's "brusque, protective father/no-nonsense American capitalist" and Thomas' "limp-wristed baronet with sopping wet eyes/the obvious object of a vain young man's woman's desires" that is prevalent in romances, especially period romances, so his withering is more to do with trying to show him as this harmless, pathetic fella.)

Lucille wasn't so much avenging him as she was putting their plan into action, which actually brings up another subtle yet brilliant aspect of Thomas' sexuality. It's the fact that he serves the role of femme fatale (homme fatale?), relying on his wiles and looks and charm to lure in women. His wilting is tactical. It serves his and Lucille's purpose as the dream team of fucked uppery.

In my little homosexual brain, I choose to believe that if any of their cons were to have gone sideways and getting Thomas to seduce a man would've proved more fruitful to their endgame, not only would he have jumped on it ASAP but enjoyed it all the way down. Lucille would've been only been a fraction less annoyed than her usual.

[michellezagenda]

Hey. So I'm here caught in the crossfire.

I'm 16F studying for an exam and I really like a teacher who isn't physically attractive but I like his humor and wit. I am a febfem and a radfem seperatist and don't plan on dating men (gone 4B).

But I have got this weird fantasy of hooking up with and being in a relatioship (ofc after I turn 18).

I have been obsessed with this guy. I literally can't focus on my exams. What I even fantasise is having an affair with him (he's married with 2 kids).

I think all men are bad and not worth it but I don't know why I keep fantasising about him all day.

I even put him on a pedestal (i don't usually put men on pedestal).

Please help me with this

PS : If you have seen this anon pop on other radfem accounts please just know I quickly want answers. I'm not spam.

ok so ur 16 im gonna be honest….let him go.. he’s grown and in a position of power and control…i mean he’s the teacher. has this ever stopped men before, no. but it’s most likely never going to happen so putting him on a pedestal is wild because all it’s going to do is get you hurt once he doesn’t live up to your expectations. Not to mention he most likely doesn’t want anything to do with a 16 year old! you are my sisters age, you guys are just older kids -which isn’t a bad thing, enjoy being 16.

Next, you are BISEXUAL. febfem, yes, but that doesn’t mean lesbian. It’s normal to feel attraction to men when you’re ….attracted to men, yk? Now ofc that doesn’t mean you need to act on it so just because you’re 4b/febfem doesn’t mean anything. As long as you never act on those feelings (which i highly doubt you’ll get the opportunity to) you’re fine. As soon as you do act on any feelings of any male you end up liking that simply means you’re not a febfem/4b.

i suggest you keep learning about the true nature of men because just because they’re funny and witty doesn’t mean anything and unfortunately it’s always too late until women & girls realize that. hope this helps.

[papillondusublime]

Sarcastic answers to give in case someone tells you:

-That you’re asking stupid questions: “You’re so stupid that you’re not even asking questions!” -That you should dumb yourself down for others to understand: “Dumb myself down? No, you, smarten up!” -That you’re too nice: “At least, I’m on Santa’s nice list and I receive presents at Christmas. You think a lump of coal will provide you enough heat to replace human warmth?” -That you’re a monster: “Yes, I’m stanning Lady Gaga. Btw, Angel High dolls don’t exist, it’s only Monster High!” -That you’re too poor: “If I’m poor, why does my cake have richer flavors than yours? I guess that having private chefs make dinner for you didn’t help you acquire cooking skills, huh?” -That you’re weak and can’t lift: “I’ve lifted myself up so many times. What’s the point of lifting weights when I can carry the weight of the world?” -That you’re a loser: “Yes, I lost my ego, expectations, attachments, illusions and worldly desires. Want me to lose my patience and temper as well, and make you lose your teeth?” -That you’re lazy: “You mean, I don’t bother replying to comments like yours? That’s not being lazy, that’s being selective about my energy use.” -That you’re untalented: “I’m not talented, I’m genius. And genius is 1% inspiration, 99% perspiration. Your face isn’t filled with sweat, but with tears at the sight of my success.” -That you’re unable to seduce people of the gender(s) you’re attracted to: “Are you upset that I’m not dating you? Sorry not sorry, I’ve got higher standards that this!” -That you’re dating too many people: “At least, I’m dating people. The only date you ever had was a play date with your imaginary friends when you were a kid.”

-That you’re weird and unpopular: “My life decisions are not made through a democratic process. I’m the master of myself, I’m the queen/king.”

-That you’re fat and should go on a diet: “Fine. Do you want me to include you in the diet?”

-That you’re too skinny and should eat a burger: “Thanks, I’ve already eaten two Bürger (German word for citizen).”

-That you’re ugly as f*ck: “Yup, I’m ugly and still get f*cked by men/women. You’re ugly and f*cked up. The ugly ducking was actually a swan, but your ugly soul will never find birds of a feather.”

-That your beauty is artificial: “Well, so is the only intelligence that you use: artificial intelligence. Unfortunately, makeup only hides physical flaws, not the flaws in your logical reasoning.”

-That your fashion style is out of style: “Yeah? At least, I’m wearing clothes! You act like you built a fashion empire of which you’re the emperor, but you forgot that the emperor is naked.”

-That you’re too happy all the time: “Yeah, I’m gay. What’s your issue with the LGBTQ+ community?”

-That you should smile more: “Oh, so you’d like to see my vampire teeth? Since life sucks, I might as well suck the lifeblood out of you!”

-That you have no sense of humor and your jokes aren’t funny: “At least, I make jokes. You are a joke. Your whole life is.”

-That you’re too loud: “I speak loudly so that even deaf people can hear me. What do you do for the hearing-impaired community?”

-That you’re too quiet: “Of course you can’t hear me when you speak over me! And besides, nobody plans a murder out loud.”

-That you’re too emotional: “I’m sorry, I thought we were rehearsing for the show tonight? In which case, you’re a terrible actor.”

-That you’re too logical, to the point where you don’t seem human: “According to Aristotle, man is a rational animal. By these standards, I’m human and you must be an alien or a wild beast.”

[wandererslcst]

◟✧⡀ ( park jimin. cismale. he/him. ) … there’s a figure off in the distance, do you see it? wait is that … KIM EUN JAE ? how long have they been standing there? if that’s really them, i believe they’re 29.  do i know them?  no,  but i hear they're SOCIAL and CREATIVE, but also NAIVE and INSECURE. i do know that they’ve been in the City for 19 YEARS. it’s crazy that they’re just standing there … shouldn’t they be working at POISON APPLE as a DANCER? maybe they’re off today, i couldn’t tell you. hope they get moving soon. hey, do you think they’re aware of the strange people around here?

Although he hails from the city of Seoul in South Korea, Eunjae and his parents moved to the United States when he was ten years old; thanks to a job offer that his father could not refuse. Jae's own opinion on the decision had not mattered. Of course, a ten year old isn't supposed to dictate where their family chooses to live, but in Eunjae's case, it was just another Thursday. See, his parents still preferred to live their life as if they had never had any children - the way they had planned to. Unfortunately this meant that Jae's existence had been entirely unplanned and whilst he tried his hardest to prove himself worthy of being their son, his parents continued to make him feel like the opposite.

Eunjae spent his first few years learning the new language, receiving tutoring from the best teachers his parents could find. Money was never an issue and it turned out to be the only love language he ever received from his family. With his father working as a surgeon and providing plenty of income, his mother had taken it upon herself to live her perfect housewife life - organizing parties and fundraisers for the whole town to attend. And for a long time, that was just the way life was. Studying, showing up to the parties he was being dragged to, then attending church every Sunday.

Religion wasn't something he had chosen, but it was something he'd been born into. In fact, it was only because of his parents being so religious that he was begrudgingly brought onto this earth. And yet, as years passed and his attraction developed, Eunjae discovered, to his horror, that he had a stronger interest in men than he had in women. Worse, he felt no attraction to the latter at all and no matter how hard he tried to push these feelings and fantasies away, they only got stronger with time.

It wasn't until his early twenties that he dared to act on his desires; though it was all done in secret and usually followed by crushing embarrassment and insecurities. Jae struggled to wiggle his way out of the mold he had labeled 'perfection' - the perfect son with the perfect grades, the perfect body, the perfect etiquette. With a clean mind and soul. But he had tainted it and there was no going back.

So he distanced himself from his parents (not that they would notice) and gave up on the medicine degree he had originally been trying to pursue. Instead, he finally made his own choices; getting a job as a dancer, which had always been a hobby he'd hidden from the judgmental eyes of his mother. Choosing to be happier, to be free to finally find himself and not a muted, restrained version of himself. Or as much as his mind would allow him to.

There are still days that are hard. Most days, in fact, he wonders if he made the right decision, if things wouldn't be easier if he went back to pretending to be who his parents want him to be. Eating is hard, breathing is hard. But Eunjae will keep smiling, because the one thing he never changed, was always wanting to make others happy and content, no matter the sacrifice on his own part.

[gaddaboutgriffon]

Ok picking this back up.

It’s been 8 months since Danny disappeared and the ghost situation in amity has forgot of control to the point the GIW couldn’t keep it hidden anymore, and attracts justice league attention. The JLD are sent in to clean up while the main league deals with the Ecto acts violating the meta acts. The JLD find group of teens barely keeping both the Ghost, GIW, and Fentons dra at bay while the rest of the town seem to be holed up in the mayor’s bunker. This Teens are Sam with fully realized liminal plant powers and some occult magic. Tucker with technopath and Egyptian magic. Val with her ghost hunter suit. Jazz who has developed empath abilities along with Amazon like strength to koolaid through walls like her father. Paulina who now has a dragon form. And let’s throw in Dash who is getting enhanced strength and speed. (Unless you guys can think of a better power for him.) those 6 are basically being recruited into young justice or teen titans which ever fits the au. And they tell the justice league members they have been looking for a missing friend for 8 months, and the exact day he disappeared. The same day Robin disappeared. Not sure who but someone is going to make a mental connection there.

———

Danny had no idea that incubating ghost cores takes longer than a normal pregnancy, or that his body would shape shift for it. He is about 13 months in but is just now feeling like Dan and Ellie could come at any day. though the first 5 months was his past self and the remaining 8 his future or is it his current self has been through it. And after 13 months of this he is irritated and snappy at everything. He can feel it is almost time though. Like almost any day soon. What makes him even more ready to break someone's neck is that everyone is looking at him like he looks like it could be any moment. He knows he does but the reminders are not appreciated. At least everyone is quick look and move away. The few times he did lose his temper and ... ahem gave some ninjas a smack down, it firmly gave them a reason not to cross the halfa.

It also had the unfortunate side effect of making this this fermenting ecto pit's Fruit loop be more interested in him. Trading the info, he had on Vlad got him in the door, but now Danny is concerned the old man is, gag, thinking of adopting him. The fact that two fruitloops want Danny in their family may not be a lot but it is enough to make him suspicious Desiree or someone put a curse on him to be a magnet for rich old mentally unstable men. at least the last hissy fit has everyone avoiding his nest. that gives him even more time with cute chubby cheeked 2-year-old Damian. A week later Dan and Ellie were out and Damian was learning how to be a sibling.

Meanwhile Jason is just confused why the training seems easier than he remembered. still bone cracking exhausting but he has a vague impression it was worse the first time. Even stranger is no missions yet. Which he is glad for since that keeps him close to Danny incase anything happens and they have to run, but it is weird. He is beginning to worry what Ras may be planning. Well, whatever it is, for now it is best to try and keep their heads low and give the twins as much time to grow as possible before they find someplace new to lay low. after all they have about 4 more years before he can return as Red Hood without royally screwing up the timeline.

well that is all i got for now. maybe someone else can add something that will inspire more.

Dead on Main time travel with a mom Danny twist.

Jason calls in a favor from someone on the justice league dark team for help with a case that got magical. the person sends him Danny. it goes well. they're both working very professionally. something happens and they end up back in time in their younger bodies.

Both of them are in the same city that they were working the case on. They are far away from home but Jason is 15 a few months before he finds out about his bio mom and Danny at this time is incubating Dan and Ellie's cores.

Neither of them quite realize the repercussions of what's Happening. The two of them team up to try and get back home. What the two of them don't realize is Danny's friends and family have no idea where he is though they are less worried than the bat family who fully believe Jason is kidnapped.

The two of them go on adventure trying to dodge any local heroes or villains. Eventually the two of them are able to get into contact with Clockwork and Clockwork tells them that they have altered this timeline too much for them to go back. 

The two of them angst about that until they have to get forced out of that because they run into a local hero. I want to say one of the Titans that work with Nightwing because then they recognize Jason but have no reason to know that he's missing.

the two of them then realize that because they're in their younger bodies everyone has no idea where they are. This is when Danny realizes that at that age he is incubating Dan and Ellie which makes him try to split off from Jason.

As Danny's trying to figure out a way to tell Jason what's going on Jason realizes that Danny is getting really sick or at least he thinks is really sick. He's getting tired more easily than before and keeps throwing up. Jason originally thought it was due to stress of the situation but it becomes more and more clear that it is not. They end up having a confrontation which leads to Danny telling him that they are basically pregnant. 

Jason tells Danny that they are not leaving them, especially not after everything that happened. The two of them decide together where to go. The two of them end up deciding the only places that they can go are Amity park or Gotham because of the ambient ectoplasm.

They can go to Amity Park except last time Danny was there it was a bad Fenton parents reveal which led to both Dan and Ellie dead with jazz wheelchair bound as well as Sam and Tucker in comas.

 Or

they could go to Gotham except Jason is probably presumed missing. Having Wayne and bat family connection is probably best for them except for Jason having a falling out in the last timeline as well as knowing that he is supposed to be dead in a few weeks. Jason knows that his death is a major turning point for his family as well as many other things in the timeline.