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galene-gothic · 7 months ago

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𝖸𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝖼𝗎𝗋𝗋𝖾𝗇𝗍 𝗌𝖾𝗅𝖿, 𝖿𝗎𝗍𝗎𝗋𝖾 𝗌𝖾𝗅𝖿 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗀𝗎𝗂𝖽𝖺𝗇𝖼𝖾 𝖿𝗋𝗈𝗆 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗆

୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊ I hope this reading found you in good health, every reblog is appreciated and thank you for everything :) ˖♡ ˎˊ˗ ꒰ 🐇 ꒱

ˏˋ༻ʚ♡︎ɞ༺ˎˊ˗ PAID SERVICES TIP JAR

⊹ ! ೀ Pile 1 ꒱

꒰ Your current self ꒱

Currently, you’re in a state of ‘pause’ is what I’m getting. Your perspective is different from what it once used to be but you’ve not fully developed it yet. You think that you’re starting a new, like you’re still building foundations for your character and life. You could be confused about what to choose and how to move forward because there are just so many things that you want to do but there’s also a sense of curiosity and hope about where you’re being led to. You seem to be hurting emotionally and pretty low physically too. The pain that you experienced seems to have affected your mindset, hormones and hence, your focus, and body in general. You could be feeling more tired these days and I’m picking up on a sense of burn out. Some of you are carrying on working despite this sense of burn out and lack of focus that you feel while the rest of you have sort of broken down. I wouldn’t be surprised if some of you cry a lot or are just genuinely really hurting. There were bitter endings, possibly one after another for some of you, it’s just hard to process it all. You could find your heart hurting, chest hurting or your posture being very bad with your shoulders and back slouching down. Emotionally, you seem to have dealt with major fights or drama. There is a competitive energy that I am picking up on from other people and even you. Due to how competitive they were being, you could have acted accordingly too but it led to connections ending. Much of it was not even competitive, it was outright aggression and power that they were trying to place, and have over you. You seem to be in a state of mourning. Somehow these moments of feeling emotionally unfulfilled, left out and no connection with others is what’s caused you to come out to be more in your power. You desire status, morality and power, every time that you’ll get distracted, you’ll get hurt and that hurt will redirect you into this mode of desiring respect, status, morality and power. Some situation where you put a lot of effort and tried to see through end up breaking you down and it could have caused you to be aware of your childhood issues. You’re growing into a more empowered version of yourself but for right now, you are in a state of pause. You desire power, status, control, etc. but due to this pause state, you aren’t being able to cultivate it or go after it. You have a desire for selfless service or you just enjoy giving, you’ve fallen victim to receiving the shorter end of the stick in the past and have started really valuing mutuality, reciprocation and equal give, and take. You pretend to have it all in front of others even if you may not. You tend to feel lonely too but decide to maintain inner abundance and gratitude while moving forward. It is definitely difficult for you to feel abundant though, you’re not feeling emotionally fulfilled. You are choosing to live with your passionate and fiery nature or you just naturally are doing so, and have a silent power due to all that you’ve learned from past experiences. You also keep your emotions and what you’ve gone through close to your chest, and mind so that your mind can process it and learn from it. Your heart has turned sort of iron-like and it would be difficult to melt it. You feel pretty lonely though. You seem to love to enjoy spending money. Like, it could be a way to cope honestly but yes, you’re trying your best.

꒰ Your future self ꒱

Your future self is someone mature who takes life seriously. Mentally, they’re going to be thinking about wanting happiness within the house and love. They’re going to be thinking about sex a lot as well. I’m picking up that you either already think about sex a lot or used to but have a low libido ever since the realisation of whatever tragedy occurred in your life hit you 💀. Either way, your sex drive is going to be high. You’re going to be carrying the realisations of past heartaches and will have learned your lessons. You’ll be craving love pretty deeply though. For some of you, this could be a future self who’s already in a relationship. They’re going to be nurturing, loving and almost mother-like in nature. You’re going to have stepped into your power and will have grown a lot. You’re going to be aware of your darker sides and weaker sides, and will be working with both of them. You’re going to be a bit “me, me, me” because you’ve always been “others, others, others” in the past and they kicked you, and left 😍. You’ll still be craving deep, devotional love though. You will just want the quality of love to be high or you won’t want it. Also, emotionally you’re still not gonna be over things yet but you’ll be seeing the light at the end of the tunnel and will be recovering since things will not be as fresh any longer. You’re going to be craving old school and traditional connections romantically, and in terms of friendships, you’ll want ethical friends who would stick by you and remain ever loyal. You’re going to be very soft hearted, sensitive and loving. I’m also picking up on you being competitive and drama not scaring you as much anymore. You will look at others trying to fight with you or intimidate you as something flattering because why do they give a damn about you? You’ll be focused on your goals most definitely, almost aggressively focused. “You either assist me, move out of the way or let me walk from on top of you” is the energy that I’m getting from your future self. You’re going to have a lot of empathy for other people’s pain but not at your expense. You’re going to be very loving, there’s no doubt of that. Your future self is going to be very careful regarding extremes of any situation. If they’re trusting someone too much, they’re going to pull themselves together, if they’re getting angry and yelling, at the moment they may not realise it but later they’re going to be like “I shouldn’t have behaved that way” and will try to control their anger better going forward. You are possibly going to be someone who’s rejecting people left and right until you find someone who truly does appeal to you.

You are going to be quite an over thinker and could have other’s words, and actions weigh on you. I’m getting that you might have to deal with other people trying to drag you down by humbling you, humiliating you or just talking shit about you (to your face or behind your back). You’re going to be guarded and unwilling to do too much for free, and will prefer loneliness over disrespect. You’ll have a lot of inner strength and will be persevering forward, trying to do your best. You’re going to be someone who’s difficult to break externally but yes, you’ll either be dealing with sleep issues, overthinking and breaking down by yourself, etc. but will not allow others to see you break or even if you do, you’re going to make sure to continue pushing forward. I would say that you’re very admirable indeed. You’re going to be a bit cold hearted and demanding, desiring bonds that are well matched on all levels especially value wise. You’re going to want to work together with people who are willing to put in equal effort and are capable of learning, and teaching in connections and any other setting. “You either meet me at my level or you die.” Also, you’ll have many qualities that you’re going to want within them. Others could consider your hopes and standards to be unrealistic but yes, as long as you’re capable of giving what you want, you shouldn’t have to lower them. You’re still going to be healing and the pain that you’ve experienced so far is going to be something that will have stuck with you, making you fear instability and crave deep connections that are ride or die in nature. “You’ll meet thousands who like you, there will be one who you’ll spend your life with.” “You’ll find thousands of friends when you’re happy, there will only be one who you share your sorrows with.” You’re going to be very stable and grounded within yourself, and will be building a strong character, you’ll have already built a pretty strong one by then. You are going to have a mature, wise and provider kind of mentality, so you’re going to want a partner and people in your life who matches accordingly. You could very well feel like you’re out of place from rest of the people your age because they may say things like “you’re still young, have fun. Don’t take relationships too seriously” but it’s going to be in your nature to do so. You’re going to feel so grown and traditional, you’re going to have many old school values and will value the ethical way of living, wanting people who are similar to you to be friends with and get into relationships with.

꒰ What do you need to spend more and less time doing ? ꒱

You need to spend more time letting go of the idea and obsession with romantic love. Instead of wondering why you and your love has been rejected or neglected time and time again, you need to think about and understand how and where you’ve been crushing the personal progress that you’ve made as a person in order to please other people or by falling victim to peer pressure. You need to understand that certain people, things and situations are just a wastage of time, and effort. You also need to understand that you didn’t have a long term vision when it came to romance in the past because if you did, you wouldn’t have put yourself in situations that seemed to be leading to nowhere. You used to have an inferiority complex and used to doubt your ability to be loved by anyone. It was very deep rooted and so you acted out in ways that weren’t authentic to you. While, you may think that certain outcomes were unexpected and yes, certain outcomes were in fact unexpected because you seem to have been betrayed by those you invested a lot into, not all of them seem to be romance related, you’ve been let down even in platonic relationships. You’re being told to learn how to discern and instead of putting effort into situations, and people that are likely going to fail and disappoint you, focus on yourself. “Make the most of your life, while it is light, while it is rife.” You really need to redirect your focus onto yourself. Set aside the desire for love of any sort. Even if you feel the desire, which is okay, learn how to set it aside and have your focus on your own growth instead. You’re being told to learn how to present yourself in a way that’s beautiful to you. Set any and all desires for external validation aside, and figure out what it is that you truly like, what it is that you find to be beautiful, how do you personally like to adorn yourself? “You don’t need a boyfriend, you need hobbies, skills, a strong identity and a life.” You may have always gravitated towards some sort of art but may not have been able to develop it to the fullest extent that it could reach which leads to lack of confidence within you. You’re being told that it’s your calling to some extent, even if you’re not supposed to monetise it, you’re supposed to learn it so you’re always going to be called to it, so you should invest into these skills. You’re being told that isolation is a blessing. You’re being told not to be dramatic and impatient about love, if it is meant to find you, it will, and if it’s not, worrying about it will do nothing. You’re being told to mature and let go of the past completely. As in, you’re being told not to keep any space in your heart for ‘a first love’ or ‘the one that got away’, etc. Understand that it’s in the past and the past doesn’t exist, and the way they hurt and betrayed you or at least left you behind. You’re being told not to ruminate over issues from your past and instead heal them without letting yourself be emotionally shaken by them. Including issues from your childhood and school years, or whatever past you may have had during what I consider to be your formative years. You’re being told to be completely honest with yourself and accept that you’ve had negative and possibly manipulative behaviours in the past too.

I’m getting that you’re a very funny person. Some of you could have decided to manipulate someone in order to gain their affection but you got attached to them instead and forgot about your plan just because you’re that much of a loving bitch 💀. For the most part though, you have always been pretty loving and genuineness comes so naturally to you, that’s why you failed in whatever this plan or these plans were. You need to accept that your connections have been ingenuine so far, not because of you but because of your inability to be your authentic self and also other’s personal issues. You do not need to feel guilty about having ingenuine intentions initially because you didn’t even follow through. Everything you did, was in fact for affection too. As long as you received love and connection, you were not interested in manipulating anyone and acting all strategic. You seem to have always been unlucky and lonely in love, and I’m not just talking about romantic love but despite this, there’s also been some luck that you’ve had. Anyone you’ve connected with, no matter where it led, if it even led to anything, has taught you a lot and connected to you in an almost soul level. While, you seem to have struggled to present yourself authentically, those who had to see you, did see you, maybe not to the fullest extent but you received their understanding and space within their thoughts, and emotions, and that’s your blessing. If you recall properly, you’ve had at least one person adore you at almost any point of life. You’ll also never be forgotten by them because the connection seems to be kind of irreplaceable honestly. You’re yearned for and adored, and loved so deeply, and so dearly, you may not even be aware of it because these people may not feel comfortable enough expressing their affection for you due to you being inauthentic in your actions and living because they are still human, and they still don’t know if they’re just imagining certain things about you. You need to see the truth of situations and heal, and grow from situations. Forgive yourself, others and release any pain, forget past people and experiences completely. Be optimistic and remember that it gets better, only if you let it. Spend more time being honest with yourself and learning how to be present, learn how to deal with homesickness by becoming your own home instead of finding temporary solace in the nostalgia of past experiences. Learn how to create yourself and present yourself in the way you’d like, and how to create in general. Learn how to create and craft your life as you’d like, and spend more time living and doing rather than thinking, and weeping. Always remember “life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.” You need to spend less time being indecisive about investing into connections or investing into them further. You need to be honest with yourself about what’s going on i.e. if someone treated you well in the past but has switched up recently, you need to accept the current version of them and not let them consume you or have a hold on you emotionally. “The moment you feel like you’re competing with someone else for affection, connection and to be chosen, you’ve lost.” You don’t need to know and understand everything but you need to make difficult choices in regard to seeing the reality of things.

Some of your connections weren’t or aren’t as deep as you might think, you may be deeply incompatible and it is okay to accept it, and give up. “You’re allowed to choose too.” You need to understand that you’re not helpless, you’re allowed to unchoose people, you’re allowed to unlove people. If people leave you behind or start acting distant or like they do not want you, it’s not your responsibility to make things right or even think about them. You’re allowed to continue your life the best that you can with gratitude and being present instead of thinking about what occurred. “You’ll be much happier if you do not think about the past, do not romanticise connections but instead find beauty in your present moment and practice gratitude.” You also need to stop being so generous and giving. Learn how to not give too much of yourself to anyone and not give to anyone who doesn’t reciprocate. “There are other people pleasers in the world too, let them please you. You do not have to be the one to extend an invitation for connection every single time.” You need to stop having hope and daydreams about connections that are not grounded in reality, and stop being loving to everyone. “Your love is sacred, learn how to gate-keep it.” You’re being told that doing things for people, being nice to people, reaching out first, etc. being all loving does not mean people are going to choose you. Also, just because people chose someone else over you doesn’t mean they made a good choice. Stop seeing hope and potential in hopeless people, and don’t act out of emotions for them, understand that everything in life is an investment and negotiation, and on the long term, emotions may not always be fruitful but common sense definitely is. Sometimes making premature decisions is the best that you will do for yourself. The spirit is telling you that you do not need to give chances or get to know people and situations deep enough to decide what you want to do with them. “You do not have to drink the entire ocean in order to know that the water is salty.” Give up on thinking about the ‘what if’ way of thinking because if they cared enough, there would be no space for the ‘what if’ way of thinking. “Your affection won’t be valued unless it’s earned.” You just need to give up on trying to get people to like and love you. You need to stop giving yourself away to others and giving them chances to show themselves if they’ve already disappointed you in any way. You need to stop giving your affection away for free just because no one seems to want to claim it for themselves :(. Choose yourself, even if it leads to loneliness. You tend to feel like you don’t belong anywhere, like no one has loved, understood, prioritised and chosen you. You also probably know that you’ve given a lot to others in hopes of receiving just something, just anything but you need to stop placing yourself at such low value, that’s when you’ll be loved and people will try to understand, and choose you. Your desire for giving and receiving love, and attention should not take away your reasoning skills and value. Thank you for reading, much love and take care.

⊹ ! ೀ Pile 2 ꒱

꒰ Your current self ꒱

Right off the bat, you’re taking the landslides that you survived and turning them into mountains for you to climb. You’re a loving person who thinks about romance and sex a lot. Also, beauty and being attractive. You desire being someone’s crush and the kind of romance that you seem to want to experience is romance where it feels like you’re soulmates, are deeply and primally attracted to each other, not just physically or character wise but as a whole, as if it’s just the other person that you were looking for and vice versa. “No one else compares” is what I heard. You also want them to have a crush on you for the rest of your lives and you want to feel the same kind of attraction towards them. You want to feel your heartbeat quicken, face heating and feet happily start swinging at the mere sight of them. This is so cute. However, at the same time, right now you are more self sufficient and want to be by yourself for a bit. I just heard the saying “if you try to catch butterflies, they will fly away but if you spend that time building a beautiful garden for yourself, the butterflies themselves will come flying to you.” I think you know that right now, you will probably not meet the kind of person you desire and even if you do, you want to be focusing on yourself so that you can connect with them authentically. Your beauty and attractiveness seems to be your focus too. You make an effort to look good on a daily basis. You’re also someone who doesn’t express yourself too deeply right away. You have accepted the cycles of life and count your blessings, and things to be grateful for rather than the shortcomings that everyone has in life, in one form or another. You have accepted that life has ups and downs but are in a much more stable place now, you’ve also attained a lot of wisdom and are flowing according to your destiny, even if you feel like it’s not like that, you are. Some of you here feel assured about your future despite not knowing everything about it because there’s just this awareness that things will turn out alright. Someone here has been seeing 222 a lot recently. You’re a very charitable person who gives to others without asking for anything in return. You desire to be more giving and service oriented but just know that you’re already giving what you can, and have always done so. You’re a very abundant person and I think you lean more towards the glamorous side in regards to style, appearance and charm.

Despite your independence and glamorous way of presenting yourself or wanting to do so, your kindness, giving and down to earth charm kind of just shine through. No matter what you may wear and how independent you may be, when in public, you look out for people, try to help them if asked, offer them something that you may be eating, etc. Also, maybe because you present yourself so well, others offer you help and free things. You’re also someone who just because you do things for people or they do things for you, you do not just let them into your life, you still try to vet them properly or just decide that you won’t let them enter your life right at the start. Emotionally, you’re very strategic and also keep things close to your chest. You understand that people could be lying to you, fooling you or may just not have the best intentions towards you so you maintain secrecy too. You’re self protective and private with your emotions, not wanting to talk about certain things to certain people. You deeply value intimacy, honesty and peace, and you know that even if no one else in the world gives that to you, you can give it to yourself. You value self care and know that when you’re emotionally vulnerable, it’s best to take your space. You probably love your bed a lot these days especially if it’s winter wherever you live 💀. You do not try to force things and instead patiently wait for emotional connections that are meant for you to find you. You can also acknowledge how far you’ve come and feel proud of it but yes, you do desire more. You desire recognition and want to be valued, and praised. You probably have some dream that you want to fulfil and you’re being told that you are capable of achieving it. You’re also a naturally abundant and content person. You’re letting go of many insecurities or issues but every-time you feel like you’ve let them go, you end up realising that you still kind of hold onto them. You are especially a very possessive person who wants people for yourself. You’re not toxic but you like to experience life and especially love, and romance wholeheartedly, you want it to consume you, you want to heavily indulge into it. You want to have the space to give to the other person, to almost devote and sacrifice yourself to them, and you won’t feel safe enough to do that unless someone is yours to keep.

꒰ Your future self ꒱

Your future self is someone who is emotionally fulfilled and puts emotional abundance as something very important to them. They think that the reason emotions are being used against each other in this world is because humans are deeply emotional beings and as long as one can control their emotional state, nothing will overpower them or have control over them. They have a fiery personality and goals, and are just unabashedly charming, full of life and going after what they want. They’re also very witty and curious about things. They’re someone who is unwelcome at a community because of competition. Others tend to compete with them and just treat them aggressively or passive aggressively, trying to humble them. “You’re not all that” is what I heard. They are principled and ethical. They are also down to earth and genuine intentioned so when all of this happens. They’re going to accept that connections didn’t progress as they had wished and will be bringing out a more firm and stern side of them compared to the friendly, fiery and warm side that they had previously greeted others with. They’re a reasonable person who won’t pick beef with people without being picked on first and in fact, even on being picked on, they won’t say anything back but will not let themself break down in front of the people who are trying to bring them down. Despite, the external tensions, their inner abundance will not be depleted, in fact, they’ll only find it flattering that others are so affected by them. Also, at that time, you’re going to be feeling like whoever is hating on you, trying to bring you down or is creating fights and chaos with you isn’t even all that. I have a feeling that you’ve already dealt with something similar to this because you seem to know exactly how to go about it. It is going to make you feel unstable most definitely but you’re going to keep in mind to tap into your inner strength and continue pushing forward with self control, and a compassionate, soft and therefore fierce energy. Despite everything that they’ll be putting you through and it inevitably interrupting your peace in some way and you feeling pretty left out from community.

Also being more reserved and cold in contrast to yourself in the past, you’re going to continue pushing forward as a controlled and compassionate person, you’ll also be waiting for better days to come but will already be fairly content with where you are at. ‘IT girl’ by Aliyah’s interlude is energy that I’m getting from your future self. Whatever they’ll be doing and however they will be treating you is only going to motivate you to do more, be more and win more in the future. You’re going to be feeling determined to work hard and succeed. You’ll have developed really strong willpower by then. You already seem to possess it but in the future, you’ll be more fearless? You’re going to have let go of many of your insecurities and will not be willing to let anyone strip you off your power. You’re going to be very powerful, choosing to take it back again and again if necessary. You’re going to have many options at that time and will have a slight coldness, knowing your boundaries and maintaining them even if it’s considered cruel or excessive. You’re going to be fiercely protecting yourself without even saying anything, you will just be holding up well and with self control, choosing to not let their words and actions get to you. You’ll want to be yourself at all costs that’s for sure and you’ll be doing a very good job at that. Actually, at some point, you may say something, not early on. You’re someone who can take a lot until you eventually burst. You’re also someone who doesn’t express frustrations to others but instead just grows from whatever they made you go through. That’s going to be a place and environment where you’ll either learn how to stand up for yourself verbally, will already be doing so or will simply just win by actions, and decide that that’s what works best for you. ‘Wannabe’ by ITZY and ‘obsessed’ by Mariah Carrey (alongside the song I mentioned earlier) is the energy that I’m getting here. Your future self has a lot of haters, stay prepared and brace yourself for what’s to come.

꒰ What do you need to spend more and less time doing ? ꒱

You seem to have experienced moments that pretty much pulled the earth from right beneath your feet. It was very difficult to make sense of everything and you had to deal with the fear that came with unavoidable changes and hence, unavoidable circumstances. These sudden changes happened related to some commitments, it could have simply been committed and stable friendships or relationship that you had worked hard to build that turned out to not be as much as you thought it was. You seem to have invested heavily though. If not, there was some sort of an institution or community that you left behind, by choice or force. “A major sacrifice but clueless at the time” is the energy that I’m getting here. For example, if you left your previous school, you could have terribly missed it, if you left your home town, you could have missed that instead, etc. Many emotions were connected, you had tried to be ever loving and empathetic, trying to give the best of you to certain people, connections and situations but it led to you not being able to fix anything because these people were twisting your words and actions based on their own personal insecurities, maturity and values at that time. I’m getting that you were trying to lovingly make them understand you and your emotions, and also listen to their own thoughts and emotions so that you can correct anything that may have hurt them but their main focus was on misunderstanding you even if at that time, they tried to make it seem like they were interested in fixing things or like they were dealing with the situation with maturity when that wasn’t the case. Some sort of self forgiveness had to take place and it did. It seems like before all of this chaos occurred, you had made significant progress as a person, character wise or so it seemed so when you ended up straying away from it and the realisation of it hit you, it just led to some mourning and questioning, also regrets. However, you are a fair person and you’re able to accept if you may have done somethings wrong, if you made mistakes too but mostly, you did realise that there was a sense of unfairness and were desiring fairness. Since, you had that understanding that the world isn’t fair, you could have started believing in karma or you literally experienced karma. For example, you did something that affected someone else but you experienced a similar or possibly even the exact same situation or well, this is just confirmation that you and others are going to have to reap what you sow, that it can’t be avoided so if others have done you wrong, just let it go and if you have done others wrong.

Just accept what’s to come and try to perform good karma to balance it out. It was something that required you to have to restart, to rebuild from within and also the outside. You were trying your best to stay controlled. At that time you were trying to practice self compassion so that you’d feel better and also so that you’d be able to extend your compassion outwards. There was acknowledgment that the grass is in fact greener on the other side. You diligently worked on yourself and life itself which led to you meeting parts of you that most people would much rather not see about themselves but though fears and confusion could have popped up and most likely did, you only used it to grow further. You grew to become more mature, wise and emotionally intelligent through what you experienced within your psyche. You also got more in touch with your personal charms and are warm, also competitive as in, you want the best for yourself and will strive to get it. You’re a loving person who’s come to realise after many conflicts and illusions that true love is healthy and empowering, and in romance, two people hold each other to the highest regard, loving each other the most, without feeling the need to let their eyes and attention wander elsewhere. You also got really in touch with your own authentic love energy, pouring your love into yourself causing you to retake your power. You’ve grown to have even judgement and are being called to be your authentic self, you’re already being so to the best of your abilities. There’s a desire to be seen being your authentic self just because you’re shining brightly. You also want to be secretive and private despite shining. You want to have a persistent and strong personality where you don’t break but instead keep on going. You’re being told to join the world. You should spend more time becoming one with the world. You experienced others unnecessarily competing with you in the past and are abundant so aren’t connecting with people as much as you could be but you’re being told that it’s time now. You need to trust yourself enough to not let others take you for granted and need to let your guard lower just enough to connect with others because you’re going to learn a lot from them that will prove to be valuable to you going forward. If you’re delaying joining university or getting back to education or skill training of some sort, you’re being reminded that no matter what you may do, time is going to pass anyway. You’re being told that no matter how much strategy you may approach life and other people with, it’s not worth it. You deserve those who are interested in you and love you for who you are, and not the games you play or challenges you provide.

Feel hot, dress up, do your hair and makeup, try heels, go out, just spend more time taking care of your body and presenting it the way you like, also think about it positively while trying to maintain healthy habits in order to honour your own body. Make sure to stay true to yourself and if that’s not possible, remind yourself of the truths that you hold close, that you hold sacred and simply just ‘true’ whenever you stray away from them. Have fun, live life and explore the unlimited potential that you have. Free yourself from the trauma, limiting and negative beliefs, and mindsets placed upon you by the actions of other people. For some of you here, probably because it’s winter, you have a hard time getting out of bed in the morning, if you live in the southern hemisphere and it’s not cold for you, for some reason you could still have a bad sleep schedule. You’re being told that you need to get out of your bed first, the rest will follow. As soon as you wake up, after a while of lying, decide that you’re going to get up within three seconds and go for it. The three second rule is going to be a golden rule for you, you’re being asked to master it. There is also another rule that I’m picking up on. 555 rule where you should ask yourself “will this affect me in 5 minutes?” and if it does, ask yourself if it will affect you in 5 hours, days, weeks, months and years. If it doesn’t affect you for five years going forward, don’t spend more than five seconds stressing about it xD. Spend more time rebuilding and truly determining the value of things, and people. Build a mindset of growth where you’re focused on growing and also remember the lowest moments you’ve gone through which has left you in a place you’re currently at. You might have dealt with a low reputation and social/financial status where you were barely treated like a human at some point? Use it as a motivational drive for you to build more and more for yourself. You need to make sure to heal yourself and keep your mind as clean as possible. Don’t waste your energy, love and connection on those who aren’t ride or die, there will never be a way to determine if someone is loyal and ride or die because humans lie and always try to present themselves as being better than they truly are, all you can do is let people give up on you if they want to. Don’t hold onto connections too tightly, it isn’t always that you’ve done something wrong. You seem to know logically that it’s not up to you to make everything right but you like to try until the end so that you don’t have any regrets which is a good trait but you need to train yourself to let others go, to let them be, to let them think, feel and experience life the way they want to, if they think that it’s better off without you.

Find solace in solitude but be open to connecting. You’re allowed to be mad at people even after all this time because you seem to have been done pretty dirty at some point but crying over spilt cups doesn’t do anything. You’re being told to never forget your sorrowful and low moments, and how you managed to rise above it but also always focus on moving forward with love. Have love for yourself, for the world and everyone within it. Your genuine and thoughtful nature which causes you to notice little details such as how someone is looking for a pencil in their pencil bag just to not find it when the test has already started, etc. is what makes you so special. Your essence is entwined with love. No matter how happy you are, don’t forget the sorrow that still exists in the world. Use the knowledge and resources you’ve managed to gain so far to try, and help others. You do not have to do anything beyond your means but just do as much as you can. Always lead with love because the bravest leaders are able to hold love. Anyone can push their will without compassion for the rest of the people involved if put in a position of power. That’s dictatorship, not love. They’re usually resented or/and feared, not respected. Kind people who do not bend over backwards to please others but still lead with love and understand the reality of the world, the suffering of others and seek to love, to give, to serve are respected and become natural leaders, and role models. Aspire to be more loving and kind but don’t forget your negative experiences of the past, don’t let them have a hold on you but understand that some people, their minds, actions and intentions are so dirty, and disgusting that it is better if we do not even understand how they think because just five minutes into their psyche could leave people like us in a state of disbelief and lack of comprehension, pretty much traumatised. It would be difficult for us to even accept that someone can and does think that way, and that they exist in the same world as us. With that being said, spend more time compassionately extending yourself and your love to the world but don’t trust just anyone, don’t let just anyone in and understand that it’s sometimes better not to understand why people do what they do, and how they think, and how they truly are. Be discerning and understand that you don’t owe anything to anyone, you do owe certain things, qualities, actions and responsibilities to those you have personal connections with but don’t bend over backwards for the rest. Feel free to reject romantic connections without feeling bad, in fact, you need to do it more.

Understand that you’re not at a lack, I personally do not like to believe in the concept of ‘options’ but understand that there are a lot of possibilities and that you deserve the best, you deserve what you give out, don’t be thirsty enough to settle. Fiercely be yourself, defend yourself from the inside by not letting anything affect you even if you do not externally do it. Have faith that you’ll find the kind of people and connections you deserve, and desire, and don’t settle for anything less. Move on to bigger and better things, and leave anything, and everything behind if it doesn’t serve you well. Don’t regret anything, don’t forgive people in order to reconcile with them, don’t hold grudges but don’t forget the disrespect so that you’re not naive enough to let them or anyone put you in a similar position again. Don’t settle for being anything less than a priority. You need to get rid of the mindset that there’s always someone else. Understand that even if there is someone else, it doesn’t lessen your value. When the presence of a third party is made known to you, take it as a blessing, a sign that you deserve better than that and that it’s time for you to walk away. Real life of example of this is that you could be gold by there are people who still prefer silver despite gold being more valuable. Understand that you’ve done the best that you could and don’t be scared of changes, reflect on the changes you’ve already undergone and how they have affected you positively instead, and readily welcome changes. Do not act moody with others and don’t overextend empathy either. Carry yourself as though you’ve literally won a lottery worth a million dollars or even better, as if you’ve earned it. You’re being told that it’s time to let go of your childhood trauma or trauma related to beauty, attractiveness, etc. during your younger days. If you felt like you were romantically unlikeable back then, it’s okay. Think what you want but know that it’s not your reality anymore. There’s no need to feel hopeless and unattractive remembering past days, and events when you’ve so obviously changed. Stop thinking that you need to change anything about your standards, that they’re too high, etc. when that’s not the reality. Don’t change yourself for love and connections, and only engage when there’s mutuality and ethics involved. Don’t wake up all night overthinking. I’m getting really high cortisol levels for some of you. It’s like, when you get in bed, for a while you’re unable to sleep because when you try, you feel uncomfortable, you feel a tingly sensation that makes you want to fidget, you just feel irritable at that time honestly.

You’re being told not to overthink during the day and at night, and to try and go to bed early if possible. If you cry before bed after replaying the default negative thoughts or possibly even adding onto them, you need to minimise it until you stop completely. You’re being told to meditate at night, especially before bed. Don’t give up, you can’t afford to do so right now because I’m getting that some of you do not come from fortunate families where you’re naturally well respected, it’s something that you’ll have to earn. Others of you, even though you’ve grown a lot, there’s a certain standard that you hold yourself to and have a vision for. You’re bound to get there if you keep pushing forward but you do not need to be hard on yourself or disregard your value as you are. You are already who you want to be, you’ve just not received the peak that you desire yet but the core is still the same, when you become successful, you’re not going to ‘become’ someone because you’re already that someone, you’re just going to have more achievements to show for it at that time. You’re an overachiever in every aspect, you feel like you need to be witty, smart and intelligent person, who has a life and multiple things going for them but also someone who is well balanced in their work and home life, you think that you need to be emotionally available and understanding as well, and ethical, principled and respectable if you want to be loved, and that’s great. You should strive to maintain these skills and grow them accordingly but know that you are not unworthy of love just because you might fall short in certain ways and situations. Be nice to yourself, you’re just human and trying your best. You are doing well but this deep rooted belief of your unworthiness brought about by past experiences when you were younger and your mind was more impressionable still affects you, you seem to logically know that every thought that your mind comes up is not true but this belief is deep rooted, and is going to have to be pulled from the very root itself for it to stop bothering you. The most effective way of doing so is going to require self control and mental strength, when such thoughts come into your mind, affirm to yourself that they’re not true, remind yourself and just let those thoughts go, do it every time until you eventually start believing that it’s not true because as soon as something like that comes up, you already know that it’s not true. You’re doing very well already though, you’re just being told to continue going. “Stay optimistic” is what I just heard. Thank you for reading, much love and take care.

⊹ ! ೀ Pile 3 ꒱

꒰ Your current self ꒱

You are letting external stuff affect you internally and question, and change your beliefs, and mindset. You are questioning yourself, the purpose of life and seem really shaken internally. You are trying to have an even judgement but are struggling to focus on work, are ungrounded, burnt out, overworked and heavily burdened. You have an interesting personality, you feel like everything is your responsibility. Some of you had gotten rid of such traits in the past for a while but they just came right back and that’s because they weren’t plucked from the roots so the roots sprouted until it grew into something like this. You need to be nicer to yourself. So well, your judgement is slightly more even than before, you’re able to see things more clearly and now that that’s the case, you’re thinking about the cold, harsh and unrealistically high standards that you were demanded to meet while not even receiving something as basic as loyalty and respect. “Now and then I think of all the times that you screwed me over, making me believe it was always something that I had done” is the energy that I’m getting here. For some of you, you think that the grass is green right where you are, that you are stuck? I think there are multiple groups of people here. I’ll just characterise you all, one by one, the first one are hung up on someone from their past but are also angry at them so if the other person tries to talk to them or were to do so, they’d blow off. They seem to be feeling the connection deeply, having fears and have found different sides of themself due to the connection. They’re feeling things very intensely, they’re likely wanting to make up with the other person but feel out of control emotionally, they love their person a lot but there’s a lot of anger involved too. They are feeling pretty desperate, they do not even care if the other person wronged them because they feel like there was a reason, like the understanding that you have for the other person is not fair to you. The second group is desperately trying to make up with the other person and mad at themself even though it’s the other party that did them wrong? The third group is probably still with the person and is scared of leaving. The final group is farther off in their journey from the previous three. This group has an even judgement of the mistreatment she faced. I just heard ‘unpaid labour’ could be of any kind - mental, emotional or/and physical. All the groups are fearing the unknown but this group in particular is more disappointed than anything. This group is holding back from people and situations that could be similar in nature and tends to overthink but is focused on diligently working, this group is likely prioritising self, money, stability, education, skills, etc. above connections right now. They prioritise connections but only want them with people who are diligent, hard working, ethical and long term focused. A deep level of incompatibility is present with whoever you’re dealing with or dealt with in all the groups. The final group has a love for children, understanding just how innocent they are or they could hold a particular child dear to them, or a place with children around could have affected them significantly and they hold it dear. If not, they dream about their childhood, they reminisce about the past, they think about their hometown, they might in fact be in their home town, etc. If you belong to this group, I’m just going to talk to you in first person now. If you belong to the other groups, you’re free to read it because this is who you’ll grow into if you simply just find a little more courage and if you’re not planning on doing better, this reading is useless.

I’m saying it with peace and love but there’s no future self, you’re going to be stuck in this energy or even worse if you do not free yourself from it. You’re being warned, if someone has started acting up and disrespecting you, if you’re starting to hurt “don’t worry, this is just the beginning” is what you’re being told. However getting back to the final group of people, this group is mad that they ever thought they were meant for something so less, that they were acting so desperate for something or someone with little to no value. All of the groups are likely to have quite a temper. You sometimes end up comparing yourself and your achievements to other’s. However, you try to ground yourself by doing routine activities, to get you back in touch with reality. You have become intolerant after everything that you had to tolerate in the past. You still don’t understand certain things, you have fears, confusion and overthink just like others but this seems to be a channel for you to get to know yourself deeper, to form a deeper relationship and understanding of yourself so that you can be more at peace with yourself, and your life experience is richer. Not everyone has such an access to their own psyche, you do, you should make use of it. You tend to feel things very intensely and that has doomed you at times but you’re starting to heal, you have a chance to move on without any regrets. You could be realising that anything and anyone you lost in the past was not even all that after all, that they weren’t as valuable as you acted like they were 💀. “Was it just my emotions that made them seem so interesting and worth fighting for?” You desire connections to be so deep that it is almost codependent in nature, you might not accept it outwardly but think about it, what I’m saying is true. You want to blend and become one with the one you’re sharing your heart with. You’re struggling with feeling worthy and beautiful. While you’re not as down bad as the rest of the groups anymore, you’ve developed certain emotions and beliefs that aren’t accurate. The problem here is that your self worth is reliant on how others have treated you, how they treat you, etc. instead of who you truly are. Many of you here are doing well enough to know that it’s all in your head but you just become very vulnerable when the past issues come up, you’re unable to think straight because you just felt so unloved and unnurtured at some point that it was difficult to not relate your worth with it. You are very excessive as a lover or possibly even when you simply just love people, you might like to touch them, talk to them, write for them, just show your love to them in any and every way possible. Sometimes, you might not even want to separate from them at all. Right now, you seem to be a bit more distant though. You’re scared of connection and choosing to put yourself first even if it feels selfish sometimes. You have trust issues and doubt loyalty of others. You also feel like others have a misalignment of values causing you to not be able to connect with them even if you’d like. You’ve finally become biased towards yourself. You don’t mind not fitting in. In fact, you’re embracing being the misunderstood but innovative black sheep. You are supposed to use the rage, insecurities, doubts, everything as motivation to create yourself and life as you want it, and also to build more power and intellect. You’re on your way to grow to be so resourceful and action oriented that you won’t ask questions, you won’t chase anything, you’ll just know that what you want you’ll get it and if you don’t, it’s because there’s something else that’s better. You know that you have unlimited potential, it’s time to try and harness it, bring that potential to life and make something out of it because otherwise, it’s just that ‘potential’, nothing tangible will come out of it.

꒰ Your future self ꒱

Your future self is a powerful person who knows how to carry themself and is controlled. You’re also going to be someone who is reliable and understanding. Someone who is more action oriented. You’re going to be wise and have many decisions, you’re either already indecisive or are going to be like that at that time. You could just be torn between something at that time. Life will not be working in your favour, in fact, things that you didn’t even expect will have happened. For some of you, certain events that were out of your control but turned your world upside down have already happened, for the rest, it has not. However, you’ll have dealt with even more significant life changes by then. You’ll have a lot of responsibilities and burdens that you’ll be carrying mentally. You’re going to have an inner contentment but also an acknowledgment of your previous dreams having been broken. we You’ll still be recovering from the extreme changes that you’ll have experienced. You could possibly have a crush on someone at that time or might be in an innocent kind of a love relationship, could simply be a deep and mutual platonic connection too. I’m leaning more so towards a crush or a friendship because I’m getting that you’ll have too much going on in your life to be in a relationship though some of you could be trying. You’re going to be an emotionally intelligent person who wants a deep soulmate like connection otherwise. Even if you do not necessarily use that word, you’re going to want a deep, devoted and respectful connection where you see and choose each other, and each other only. You’re going to be desiring one on one connections definitely but I’m not getting any sort of desperation from your future self. They’re going to have healed a lot and will still be doing so, they’ll have forgiven and learned a lot as well, and will not be willing to settle anything less than what they desire. You’re going to have some confusions, overthinking and fears but mostly, you’re going to know yourself and have the ability to meet others at a very deep level. You’re going to have the ability to almost telepathically understand others. You’re going to have found out many truths about people and will have gotten a very deep dive into not your subconscious but the unconscious like random realisations of self, others and life will be coming to you out of nowhere. You’ll realise really deep side of yourself, others and life i.e. the dirtier sides too so you could be feeling humiliated. I’m not sure how to put it for you. It’s just going to be uncomfortable. Let me give an example, there was once a point when I deeply connected to someone. That person touched a very sensitive part of me that I was not even aware existed.

When we separated for some reason I thought it was all my fault and was being humiliated publicly too but the inner humiliation was much worst, now I’ve grown more aware of the other person’s motivations and dirtier sides, and have learned the deeper aspects of myself beyond just the sides that caused me to feel ashamed and humiliated. I feel like the feeling that I’m trying to describe is not being channeled out properly through words due to how is more of something that one experiences first hand than something that can be expressed through words. The way I remember back then is that it was a very confusing and overwhelming time but also otherworldly like I’m not sure if I’ll ever feel anything like it again due to how much self awareness I’ve cultivated and how one of a kind it was, plus I’m not as naive as I was back then. Back then, I was suddenly pushed into a place that felt unfamiliar and realising things about myself, others, and life. It felt scary, confusing and overwhelming. Especially because I was getting to know myself on a very deep level and my focus was on the negative, dirtier parts of myself but little did I know that overtime I’d understand myself deep enough to understand why these sides of me exist and also to see parts of myself that was once unknown to me. Also that the unnecessary shame and humiliation that I once felt would turn disappointment with others as I’d see their true colours and understand their intents. You’ll be regretting giving these energies so much power in the past. You’ll feel like you unnecessarily sacrificed so much and dealt with so much humiliation, and scrutiny. I wonder if you’ve already undergone whatever situation or event this is. You are going to be contemplating how stupid it was of you to let things get to your head or think that you were the problem in any way when you weren’t. You may have dealt with external humiliation too, you’re going to feel like you should have stood up for yourself and fought back. You’re going to be in a more stable position in life but will be dealing with issues with beauty, women, mother, females in general or possibly your own, or someone else’s lack of femininity and nurturing. You’re going to be healing and will be putting your personal matters, and self to be sacred. You’re going to want to or will have to spend a lot of time by yourself either by will or unavoidable circumstances. One thing that’s standing out strongly is that the door for the past is going to be almost completely closed. Your sex drive is going to be excessive but it will manifest more so as you having to masturbate every morning or/and night. Your libido is going to have grown with you 😭.

꒰ What do you need to spend more and less time doing ? ꒱

The issues that you’re dealing with are related to money, being a person of character, accepting life’s lows, accepting life’s endings and changes. Don’t get me wrong, you’re doing your best but there are better ways to deal with things. There’s this saying that goes “follow your dreams or desires” and well, life is short so you should follow your desires but I personally believe that the saying should go “follow your dharma (faith, good deeds, path of righteousness and virtue) alongside your kama (desires and pleasure)”, following your path is so much more important than following your desires because your path is right here, in the present, your desires can be grounded into reality overtime but you need to maintain a steady path first. Be a good and reliable figure to your community, and family even if they’re being difficult. Don’t do so to people please, do so because that’s right. Of course, if you’re being beaten and abused, that’s different. Also, understand that life is a cycle of good and bad. Some people have really simple and easygoing lives with their problems being very sophisticated. Such as, issues with visa, their love life going poorly or them not being invited somewhere. Some of us don’t have the privilege to have our love life or documents be our biggest problems. No matter where you belong on the ladder of wealth and no matter how low of a point you’re in, accept it and try to work with it by accepting things as they are. Don’t try to reminisce when things hadn’t changed yet unless you’re going to learn from it and instead accept changes, accept the negative circumstances and work to even them out. Treat people well even when you’re at your lowest and learn how to be the bigger person because trust me, you’re going to be very hard on yourself and hence, unhappy if you are unable to maintain a certain level of good character. Keep service in mind and instead of desiring for others to be kind to you, to receive favours from others, be the one who’s kind to others and gives them favours. Don’t give favours to those who don’t need or appreciate it like peers who are rich enough or have other people to help them but give it to poor children who might not have money to buy study material for school for example. You’re also being told that you’ll never be empty handed, don’t be scared of giving to those who can’t give back to you. Learn how to perceive people as ‘limited’, some people just don’t have it in them to match and meet you at the level that you need them to match, and meet you because that’s just their limit. You’re being told to give to those who truly need it but in the past, you’ve likely given to those who didn’t appreciate what you gave them and it felt unfair, it still does but you need to stop letting it weigh on your mind. You are not at a lack because the more you give, the more you receive, from elsewhere but you’re receiving. You are being told to stop giving to ungrateful people but to not feel bad about having done so in the past. You need to firstly make the decision to become a controlled individual who is the bigger person in situations, compassionate, loving and strong towards self and all and then to spend more time making sure you make this a reality.

Become more empathetic and develop more emotional intelligence, and wisdom i.e. also learning how to self regulate emotions better, controlling your attention to not let things get to you and learning how to not take things personally. You need to understand that people do what they do and that it often won’t have much to do with you and if it does, learn from it instead of letting it burden you. Make peace with yourself and forgive yourself, and others. Don’t let emotional issues weigh on you and don’t try to be responsible for other’s emotional well being, listen to them and be there for them if you want to but don’t carry it within yourself because it’s still their issue to deal with. Even if you try to help them, understand that it’s their karma to work through it and the only thing you can do is guide them, and the best way to guide them is by learning how to become the bigger person and by leading by example. You need to ground yourself better and passionately go after your goals, try not to hold any negative feelings or intentions towards anyone because one who holds a hot coal to throw it at someone else will only end up getting himself burnt. Keep your vision of a family in tact and strive to be the kind of person you’d want to share a family with, you are being told to keep your ego, pain and past resentments aside in order to look after your family and community. Treat people well while they’re around you even if you do not share a long term connection of any sort with them. The thing is that people won’t remember what your hair looked like, what you were wearing, etc. until you’re striking enough to have them remember how you made them feel. Besides, if your visual appeal is the most memorable thing about you, you need to start doing better in life. Spend time loving yourself and try to improve your focus, get rid of habits such as procrastination and spend more time by yourself, trying to build the life you desire. Also, learn how to be grateful and feel content with the abundance you already possess. For example, you don’t have good parents, friends or money but share a lovely bond with your siblings, understand that that in itself is a blessing. Just train yourself to see life as being half full instead of half empty. Spend less time in your mind. You feel passionately about your past, you’ve spent so much time in it after all but what you’re not realising or may have realised but aren’t being able to get rid of is how the issues of the past make you become that version of you temporarily or within your mind even though that’s not who you are anymore because there’s just a thin line between what was and what is. The energy that I’m getting is someone who was on the chubbier side and bullied for it being unable to get rid of the trauma despite being skinny. It doesn’t have to be the same thing but that’s the kind of mindset that you sometimes end up operating under. You know in your logical mind that you’re not who you used to be but it’s difficult for you to fully grasp it and get rid of what you identified with for such a long time. Whatever it is, the past you and the experiences you’ve had have caused you to have wounds concerning your self worth.

There’s this feeling of staying put mentally despite having had breakthroughs physically. For example, I was humiliated pretty badly for being ugly in middle school and it honestly feels like severe bullying to me despite nothing physical having happened so even though I’ve grown into my features, become prettier, understand that I didn’t deserve such cruel treatment simply because of the way I looked, the effects of that time have stuck to me. I do not like talking about myself because for the most part, I’m doing well and I know that I’m worthy but on certain days, the past just haunts me. Thankfully, I do not let it have a hold on me anymore though, you might be in a similar energy, you could be either in the same energy or the energy that I experienced earlier when I had just recently started changing and was not acting like the changes yet because my mind hadn’t even registered it properly yet. You’re a passionate person who has a strong character with good discernment, reasoning and virtues, and have become a go getter, and are grateful, happy and content but the self worth issues haven’t been gutted out of your system yet. Emotionally, you’ve been at terrible lows and have pulled yourself out of them in order to get better, and more stable. You also know yourself on a very deep level because you were exposed to and either are still exploring or have explored really deep into your psyche, the subconscious as well as the unconscious. You are aware of your dirty sides and your pure ones, one more thing that you’re aware of is how deep your emotions and self runs. You understand that humans are complex and have a lot of unconscious things that affect them, and that most of them never get a peek into their subconscious and unconscious but you did, it was scary, confusing and very overwhelming but you’ve still managed to come out as an empathetic and emotionally intelligent person. You need to stop thinking about the abandonments you’ve faced, many of the self worth and other issues that you’re dealing with seem to be a result of others abandoning you or hurting your emotions in such ways that you had no choice but to leave them. You haven’t moved on yet, you’re being told to move on. It’s funny because you seem to know that whatever and whoever you lost was not even that great to begin with but you so can’t help but have regrets and guilt over not having walked away sooner, not having seen the true colours early on, having ignored them and having gotten emotionally involved at all but you are also being unable to move on, you’re done with these situations though like you’re completely fed up and are grateful to be in a better place now. You’re being told to look at things as they were, that situations lacked fairness, you were probably even disrespected, these people weren’t reliable or high value, and misused your affections for them. Understand that you never truly belonged in their world because if you did, you’d still be with them. Some of these people weren’t even honest with you either in the beginning, towards the end or throughout the connection. Spend less time thinking about the betrayal and their sneaky, and messed up ways, and more time accepting them, and understanding that there’s nothing you can do except move on. By this point, you’ve gotten well enough to not hurt or cry anymore, so stop reminiscing and replaying the pain. You need to heal enough to start finding these situations boring because trust me, there’s more to life than this. Thank you for reading, much love and take care.

#pac #pac reading #pick a card #tarot pac #tarot pick a card #pick a card reading #intuitive readings #pick a deck #pick a photo

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t-a-a-1 · 7 months ago

Text

Dandelion: Prequel

4k Words

One-Shot

Summary: Optimus loves you. You love him. The two of you are too stupid to realize each other's feelings.

But following a conversation about the afterlife, you realize how much he means to you.

...

A/N: Yearning. Love confession. Jealousy. Optimus confesses but doesn't realize it. You are dumb. Angst and Fluff. Enjoy!

Dandelion: Prequel

.....

Optimus thinks about you.

A lot.

And more than he likes to recognize.

Optimus has learned many things about Earth. You showed him music, art, poetry, literature, and movies. He enjoyed them, mostly because you shared them with him. The archivist in him was hungry for knowledge and you were the chef who satisfied his craving.

He also enjoyed sharing things with you. Of everything he could of Cybertron. The arts, the poetry that sometimes you didn't understand. The history and legends of his people.

He had thought many times of the things he would like to show you once Cybertron is restored. You would love it, he was sure of that. He could take you to see a play or maybe show you the beautiful cascades of Energon or the resting place of the Primes.

Optimus also thought of building you a home. You would be coming to Cybertron often after all. Maybe if you were comfortable enough, you could live with him. That way he could take care of you, just in case you woke up scared from a nightmare. He would cradle you until you fall asleep again and if needed, you could share his berth with him. Cybertron is naturally cold, he could keep you close to his spark to keep you warm.

"I won't live forever you know?"

You were waiting for him to roll into your driveway. He had promised you to do this for a very long time now and there's no way escaping it.

"I am aware," he says as he swiftly moves forward. "Your life expectancy is rather short."

"The more reason I have to clean you up," you walk towards him. "I may die tomorrow and you may live on without a proper bath? Not in my watch."

You had two buckets of water and a hose ready to be used. Some soap, sponges and rags. The buckets were heavy as you struggled to pick them up, you somehow still managed to whistle a song as you made your way to him.

He didn't understand how you could look so content while talking about your death. Optimus couldn't even phantom the idea. Much less imagine a day when you won't be with him. He had grown too accustomed to your presence. His spark had grown too fond of you.

In fact, you had occupied so much space in his spark that he knew that it wouldn't be able to function without you.

What will he do once you are gone?

"Where will you go?"

He asks as he feels the warm water impact his windshield and hood. It was nice to think you took the time to heat up the water just to make him comfortable.

"What do you mean?" you ask as you put soap on the big sponge and start rubbing it around. You had to use a small stool to reach the top of his hood. This is the first time you were doing this and you were trying to be extremely gentle. You had to remind yourself that Optimus is still a biological being. His body may be made out of metal but he still feels everything.

"Once I stop functioning, I am certain my spark will become one with the AllSpark," he makes a small pause before continuing "But what about you? Where will you go once you die?"

You stop and look at him.

"Will it be a place where I can meet you? See you at least?"

Contemplating what to do, you look at the sides to make sure no noisy neighbor is listening to you talking to a truck. You look back at him and wonder if you should tell him the truth or lie a little. He sounded worried. It is no wonder that he perceives death differently. For him, it was just another transformation. To you ... Well, you didn't know nor could explain the finality of death. You didn't want to worry him.

"Human souls work differently," you say as you go back to wash him. This time more delicately, trying to feel each inch of scratch he has ever gotten. War was written all over his body. "We don't go to a specific place. But I think we become one with the universe."

"Whenever you feel the wind on your faceplate," you lie to him but there's enough hope in your voice to comfort him. To make him believe you. "Whenever you see the rain or snow, when you see a rainbow, a flower or star. That's where I will be. Always."

It's comforting to know that everything beautiful the universe has to offer, is because of you. Of course, it would be. How couldn't it? When you smile the sun becomes brighter. When you laugh, the sound becomes a melody. You were alive and made life so breathtaking because of it. He imagined your death would be the same. Eternally beautiful as you become one with the universe.

He ex-vents in relief and you smile. Your lie was good enough. He believed it.

Nothing else was said but spent the rest of the time in a comfortable silence. You took your time to really study him. He has many scratches, some parts of his paint were even gone and you wonder if he had insecurities about them.

After all, if humans did, what made Cybertronians different?

You ran a finger through a large scraping on the top of his hood, feeling each small bump. The scrapped metal is rough against your fingertip, wondering what had attacked him to make this much damage.

"Are they not of your liking?"

For a small second, you could hear the doubt in his voice.

"Oh, no, I-"

As soon as you are about to respond, a sports car passes by, honking loudly and making the sound of its motor as loud as possible. Although you were uncomfortable you didn't want to give the guy the satisfaction of receiving attention. But you were now self-conscious of what you were wearing, Shorts and a dirty old black shirt. You wonder how was this even attractive.

"Hey, beautiful!" the guy rolls down his window and you feel the urge to wipe the smirk off his face. "Wanna ride this instead of that old rusty truck?"

You were about to defend yourself until you heard Optimus's engines turn on, the sound of his motor was so piercing that you felt your entire being vibrate. He turns his headlights as well, bright and powerful, almost blinding the guy.

Turning to look at Optimus, you see his holoform taking the pilot seat. You hated that holoform but it will do.

"Sorry, but my husband is quite overprotective."

You tell the guy, hoping he will take the hint and leave you alone.

"Well, if you ever want a good time, I am always available," his words disgusted you but you are glad he is finally leaving. "That truck got nothing on my car anyways."

Optimus moves forward in an aggressive manner. You are surprised at his behavior but don't question it.

"Thank you," you say as you step down off your stool.

You made sure that Optimus was covered in soap before taking the hose and letting the water flow.

"I don't know why every guy with a nice car has to act so weird."

"Oh, so you did find that car to be visually appealing?" He asks. "I would understand. After all, you might prefer an automobile with more agreeable qualities for someone of your age."

"Is that jealousy I hear, dear husband?"

You liked to tease him and even flirt with him from time to time. Mostly, you knew that nothing would ever happen. It was stupid to think that a Cybertronian and a human could ever be something more than just close friends. You assumed Optimus thought the same.

He had to.

"Just mere curiosity," he says as he feels the water running through his body, watching off all the dirt. It felt nice. "And what is a husband?"

"A life partner. Husband and wife usually take care of each other until the end of their days," that was the simplest way you could explain such a concept. "And I prefer Cybertronian men if you ask me. Even old rusty trucks."

"Can I conclude that you know other Cybertronian males who are old rusty trucks besides myself?

"No, just you."

Although you couldn't see his faceplate, you knew he didn't mind the comment. The two of you had joked around before and Optimus can definitely take a joke.

"So, you do indeed believe me to be an old rusty truck?"

"Yes, but you are my old rusty truck."

Optimus didn't know why but he enjoyed the sound of that.

"And that makes all the difference."

The hospital wasn't like you remembered. You had grown used to being in a military facility and being taken care of by soldier medics. Not only because of the Decepticon attacks you had faced before but because you had seen your fair share of war while reporting for the news.

"OH YOU ARE IN SO MUCH TROUBLE NOW!"

The last person you expected to see was Agent Fowler. Stepping inside your room, with a suitcase on hand and documents on others.

"I am fine thank you," you say as you sigh heavily. "The car crash didn't kill me and no Autobots were involved... so why are you here?"

"Because I have a very bothered Prime demanding to see you, saying that as your husband he has a right to know of your well-being."

"... What?"

"Look, I knew you and Prime had something going on but this has become a national matter," he shows you the documents he was holding but your head still hurts and don't feel like reading at all.

"If you and Prime are indeed married then by law I have to let him come see you. Do you know how hard we have worked to keep the Autobot's existence a secret?"

"And since when does the government of the United States care bout following their own laws?" you look around your room. You hoped to see another change of clothes but nothing. You were in desperate need of a shower. "Look, this is all a misunderstanding, I'll talk to Prime."

"It better be. We don't want to deal with court cases about deciding which constitution laws will apply to non-human beings," Fowler was moving the documents very aggressively and you assumed those were drafts of new laws to be reviewed. He works fast.

"Do you know how many laws we would have to re-write if you and Prime were to be married? Don't even get me started if you two were able to conceive a child."

"You better than I know that's never going to happen."

"I don't know the way Prime was begging to see you didn't seem normal," he put the documents in his suitcase and for once you were glad to see him go. "If I was you, I would hurry up. I don't want Prime to cause a commotion because he can't see his wife."

"I am not his wife," you say again, the term annoying you a bit.

Fowler just rolls his eyes and opens the room's door.

"Yeah, yeah, just hurry up Mrs. Prime."

The drive back to the base was unexpectedly quiet. When you saw Optimus parked outside the hospital parking lot, you thought you would be bombarded with questions.

Instead, Optimus just opened his pilot door and let you in. Nothing else. You didn't even dare to ask him to take you home. You just let him do what he pleased.

You two arrived at the base's tunnel. He stopped before reaching the hangar. He opened the door and you assumed he wanted you to get out. You were worried by his strange behavior.

As soon as you got out, he changed back to his normal form. He didn't hesitate to kneel in front of you. His optics look at every inch of your body, examining you.

"How are you feeling?" He asks you but there is a certain coldness in his voice.

"I am fine, thank you."

He stands up, his optics still on you.

"You shall remain here until the next sun cycle. To make sure of your well-being."

He turns around and starts to walk away.

"Are you alright?"

You run towards him, your head still hurts but you want to talk to him. His indifference hurts more than you imagined.

"You lied to me."

You were confused. Speechless. Has he found out? That the only reason you were helping the Autobots to find the ancient relics is because you were waiting for the right moment to expose them? That you had a notebook in your home, with all the evidence you have so far of the existence of robot alien life? That every day you were waiting for the final piece of the puzzle. The last thing you need before revealing the truth to the world.

"While at the hospital, Mrs.Darby approached me and briefed me about your status. We talked, and she informed me that there are no scientific conclusions on Earth that your soul can become one with the universe."

You weren't expecting that.

"She said that your soul may be going to an unreachable dimension or just become nothing."

You didn't know what to say. There was a certain hurt look on his optics that you couldn't believe. He is grieving. It's the closest thing you have seen him in pain. But you couldn't say a thing. You weren't expecting this would affect him so much.

"Prime, I just ... I just didn't want to-"

"My apologies," he stops you and turns around. He didn't want to see you. That made your heart sink. The thought of disappointing him, of inflicting any type of pain was unimaginable to you.

But why?

"I just need a moment to myself."

A few days had passed. You hadn't talked to Optimus. But today was Friday and as per usual, you made your way to the rooftop, outside of the base. It has become a spoken agreement between you and the leader of the Autobots. To meet every Friday and just enjoy each other's company.

You two usually go on patrol night before and end up talking until sunrise. But today Optimus had left the base early, leaving you unattended. You took the time to go to the closest gas station and get yourself a pack of cigarettes and Optimus's favorite brand of oil. With the hope that he will still meet you.

But the hours passed and you had waited. You started a bonfire and lit up a cigarette.

More time passed and you became worried. Was he still upset? The day had become dark, the night was cold and you missed him. Stupidly so.

And you feel pathetic.

You were about to give up until Optimus finally showed up. He looked surprised to find you there. Probably thinking that you didn't want to see him either. When, in fact, it was all the contrary.

He didn't say a word as he sat next to you. You quietly put a small bucket of oil next to him. Of course, he noticed you and accepted the gesture.

You are about to take another puff from your cigarette when you see Optimus' servo reach out towards you. Using two digits, he takes the cigarette from your hand and throws it on the bonfire before you.

"Hey, I was-"

"Ratchet has informed me that this object you inhale from can reduce your lifespan significantly," Optimus slightly lectures you and you can sense some anger in his voice. "I see no meaning in you engaging in such activities."

"I am here for a good time not a long time," you say as you search in your backpack for the cigarette box. Marlboro wasn't your favorite cigarette brand but it was the only one that had menthol flavor at the gas station. "A very, very short time compared to yours."

You wanted to somehow go back into the topic of the afterlife. Anything that could open the conversation so you can have an opportunity to apologize. You wanted to hear him too, his thoughts. You wanted to know if he still finds your company enjoyable. If things were right between you two.

"You know, it kinda makes me sad that you'll probably forget me one day," you use a lighter for the cigarette, feeling piercing optics coming from Optimus. "And there's nothing I can do about it."

"I don't believe my processor will ever be capable of erasing memories related to you."

"How are you so sure?"

"I'll always have you in my spark," Optimus doesn't look at you but rather stares into the bonfire. His optics follow the dancing of the flames. He speaks freely.

"Even after I rust away and turn into nothingness. Once my spark has joined with the Allspark, it will still remember you. Even after the last star in the universe bursts into oblivion, my spark will reach you and it will call your name."

You are about to take another puff from your cigarette but his words stop you. Eloquence was not unknown to the Prime, he speaks it rather fluently but you didn't imagine it like this.

"I remember you now and I'll remember you then."

It seems he was on autopilot. It wasn't Optimus speaking but Orion Pax.

The bot who once knew how to love, the one who had dreams and hopes and was free to be himself. Without the pain in his shoulders, without responsibilities. No. This was not Optimus Prime. It was not Orion Pax. It was someone else.

His spark.

It was talking directly to you.

"My spark will look for you and I'll know it's you even if I was blind and deaf. Even if I ripped off my sense of smell and touch. I'll know it's you because not even time or death could take you away from me."

It's like he came back to himself. He blinks repeatedly after staring at the flames for too long. It was as if he was in a trance and when he turned to look at you, he noticed your cheeks. A little more redder than usual.

And all you could think of was him. Of the purity of his words. Of his beautiful being, of everything of him. His kindness, his truth. How he had changed your world with simple words. It was just him and this moment. United in this time. And you thought that maybe the reason you had been born was only to meet him. To hear those words that will forever be engraved in your heart. Will he ever know how much it means to you?

You weren't a believer. You used to be, when you were younger and less experienced. Before you witness war. Now you don't believe in anyone or anything.

But you believed in him. If anyone could make the impossible happen it was Optimus.

If he says he will find you in the afterlife, you know he will.

He made you believe.

You feel relieved to know that your existence meant more to the universe. That there's more than just finality, your soul will travel somewhere and have an impact on the bigger scale of things.

And if not ... then at least you could spend all of eternity with Optimus.

Your heart had finally begun to feel hope again.

And maybe something more than that.

Oh.

"Are you alright?" He asks, concern in his voice. "It seems you are overheating-"

"YOU GUYS CAME HERE ON A DATE WITHOUT TELLING US?!"

You shake a little and Optimus immediately moves closer to you in a very protective manner. The unknown voice startled you both although Optimus is always alert in a different way.

He immediately relaxes as his optics lay on the known small figure. You kinda wished he had stayed closer.

"Miko, leave them alone!" Jack comes out of the rooftop door, following Miko close behind. "Besides that's the whole point of a date. Let them enjoy it."

"Oh, no, you actually missed it!" you decide to amuse the kids, knowing that Optimus probably wouldn't mind you playing along.

"Prime just proposed and I said yes! We are getting married and having a bunch of human-cybertronian hybrid sparklings!"

You giggle a little, saying that out loud sounded ridiculous.

"Aha! I knew you two had a thing! Optimus always cleans his windows when he knows you are coming!" Miko turns to look at Jack and points at him. "You owe me a free meal!"

"She's not serious!" Jack says with a hand on his hip, frustration is clear. "Besides Ratchet said Earth didn't have the necessary resources for (y/n) to conceive."

"Wait, wait, wait," you throw away your cigarette into the bonfire, not wanting to be a bad influence and smoke in front of the kids. "You two talk to Ratchet about us?"

"Well, yes," Miko says. "He also bet cleaning duty-"

"Ahh, tsk,tsk!" coming from the rooftop door, the medic bot pops out. "Not talking behind my back! I did not bet on anything!"

"Yes, you did!" Miko points at the Autobot leader as Ratchet fully steps outside the door. "You said Optimus would never confess!"

"Is that true, old friend?"

Finally, Optimus speaks. He doesn't seem angry but confused.

"I-umm," Ratchet stumbles with his words until the realization hits him. "WAIT, YOU DID!?"

"No," Optimus says. "My feelings for (y/n) are strictly platonic."

"Ha! I win!" the medic turns to look at the kids. "You two will be doing cleaning duty."

Optimus sees you laugh with the kids. A scene that warms his spark. He can't guarantee tomorrow so he will treasure the now. Then maybe, if the stars align, he will gift you the strange flower he found.

A/N: Sorry for any mistakes I made, I don't proof read lol.

In this story, I originally intended for Optimus to have this big realization but Dandelion was already too long and rushed for my liking.

But, I think he has loved the reader for way longer than he realizes and when he does realize it...

Uff. He feels like a complete idiot and begins yearning for you like crazy.

I think Optimus would be devastated at the thought of one day losing you. He just doesn't know he would feel like that.

But I think my version of Optimus and Reader is that both of them are very oblivious to each other's feelings. Because in their mind, there is no way a Cybertronian and a human could ever share intimate feelings.

So they just go around each other thinking, 'Oh, this is a person whose company I enjoy very much' and 'Caring so much for this individual is absolutely normal ... Right?"

Dandelion was supposed to be a one-shot story but due to the support given I decided to write a prequel for it.

Sadly, I don't think I will write a continuation of the story. This is to prevent any more spoilers for the current fanfic I am writing 'The Darkest Hour.'

This prequel already gave out too many spoilers as it is and as I was writing this I had to stop myself from integrating certain scenes I wanted to write.

For example, Optimus finding out that human souls actually go nowhere goes completely different.

He can't understand the finality of death and he grieves for months at the thought he may not see you in the afterlife. He makes his research, anything, any sign that your soul and his spark might reconnect again.

And one day he sees you throwing away some of your things (you were cleaning your house) And he goes through the trash and asks you if he can stay with the things.

You tell him no because those things were trash (to you) they were like old used notebooks, empty boxes, pens, old clothes and make-up. He starts gathering things up but you take them away and he very anxiously tells you:

"Why are you so cruel to me? I only wish to preserve your memory once you are gone. You have taken my spark, do you also wish to take what's left of my sanity once you leave my side?"

Of course, he later on realizes that his love for you is so intense and real that he is certain his spark will meet your soul once again.

Dandelion may have come to its definite end but if you really want to read more then I do recommend reading 'The Darkest Hour' although it is a slow burn, it will have this type of content but more improved and polished.

ALSO

Requests are open so if any of you have any prompt ideas, you may inbox me or send me a message on this account. If you have any questions, comments, or concerns, everything is welcome! I can write small drabbles and other stuff.

And once again, I want to thank you all for your kind support! I am very new to Transformers and I didn't think I would be good enough to write fanfiction of it. But all of you have been extremely kind and I'll continue to write things that make me and all of you happy. Thank you for reading!

And I'll see you next time :)

Dandelion Pt.1:

https://www.tumblr.com/t-a-a-1/768702467874684928/dandelion?source=share

You can also read my other stories in here or Ao3:

https://archiveofourown.org/users/peachesandream

Thank you!

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grandline-fics · 2 months ago

Note

okay, so, it’s rainy and dark and i’ve got a nice scented candle burning—truly immaculate PEAK cozy vibes, basically, and it just made me think of how some of the older one piece dudes would enjoy spending some nice cozy quality time with an s/o. definitely mihawk, i think, but i’d also be very interested in croc, shanks, and/or smoker, if you have the inclination. love your work, have a great day, thank you for feeding us quality content

DESCRIPTION: Quiet, cosy quality time with them

WARNINGS: none, just fluff. small amount of insecurity in Smoker's

CHARACTERS: Mihawk, Shanks, Smoker

WORDS: 1,891

A/N: Thank you for this request! I love the cosy prompts so much and this was so nice to work on. I hope you like what I managed to come up with for this

First fic written with the new laptop. Guys it's such a relief to be able to write without fear it's all going to die and I'll lose everything. Here's some fluff and I hope you all enjoy! 💕

*REQUESTS ARE OPEN*

DIRECTORY | PROMPT LIST | KO-FI

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MIHAWK

Mihawk thrives in the quiet, he knows the life of a pirate and the fighting will always bring noise and chaos and the constant sound of attacks and the song of his sword slicing through those that he’s deemed his prey. Since founding Cross Guild the noise has only seemed to grow, no thanks to the clown and his rowdy followers. In a way he is in a small part grateful to the increased noise because now in moments like these, in the time he spends with you, he savours the peace so much more. From the shared bathroom he looked up at the sound of the door opening and offered you a small, calm smile when you emerged.

You’d been out on your own mission and had just returned but managed to get caught in the torrential rain on the walk back to the base. After a successful hunt and stretch of time away, the hot water, fresh change of clothes, and being back in your own sanctuary with Mihawk was already working wonders. Immediately you crossed the space and settled on the sofa beside him, curling up against his side and letting out a long content hum. The lazy smile on your lips grew when you felt Mihawk press a tender kiss against the side of your head.

The heat from the shower still clung to your skin and he curled his arm around you, squeezing you just another fraction closer even though you were already as close as you possibly could but still he needed just a little bit more. You were always happy to comply, pressing more and wrapping your arm over his chest and laying your head against him. As the heavy rain fell against the windows you felt your body grow even more relaxed. After letting out a long yawn you rubbed your eyes and focussed on the book in Mihawk’s hand, your mind sharpening slightly to crane you head back enough to look at him.

“Is that one of my books?” You asked with a small smile while Mihawk turned the book to show the cover to you, in false, innocent curiosity.

“It would seem so.” He mused idly, adjusting the book to continue reading while letting you see which part he was at.

“Oh my favourite part’s coming up!” You softly gasped with as much enthusiasm as your sleepy, relaxed body could manage. You looked to Mihawk once more, not surprised to see he was already meeting your gaze. You never knew how it was possible but the sharp, shining gold in his gaze filled you with a reassuring warmth and steadiness. “Will you read to me?”

“Of course I will.” Mihawk’s simple compliance to your request was so soft but made you smile broadly and you settled back down. As Mihawk’s deep, comforting voice began to read to you and fill the room it melded perfectly with the sound of rainfall and pulled you into the purest and strongest feeling of calm and protection. Eventually Mihawk paused in his reading, gaze softening to see you were fast asleep. Gracing another loving kiss against your head Mihawk returned to reading aloud for you to ensure he honoured his promise to you and that you heard your favourite part.

SHANKS

There isn’t much time or opportunity for you and Shanks to enjoy one-on-one quality time where it’s simply just the two of you and didn’t include when you were in bed together. Without fail you’re both surrounded by the crew as you sail, when you fight your enemies, and when you’re settled on an island for the chance to party and resupply. Even on the quieter days on the open water the two of you were not left to your own devices, there would always be someone-usually most of the crew- wanting either of your attentions in some capacity. Neither of you felt annoyed by the dynamic and constant presence of the crew in your free time, both of you were used to it by now. It just meant that when those singular little moments did occur they were embraced and made the most of all the more.

You woke first, curled up on your side with Shanks’ arm curved around you protectively, holding you tight against his chest and his head pressed as close as possible in the curve of your neck. For just a moment as you felt the haze of sleep lift from your relaxed frame you enjoyed the warmth of Shanks’ body and soaked in as much as the peace and quiet as you could of the early morning. You listened keenly to the slow rock of the ship and gentle lapping of water but there was no other sign of life. Then you remembered that you’d docked on an island, so many of the crew had scattered the night before to make the most of all they could see, do, eat and drink so it was correct to assume they found other places on land to lay their heads. Knowing this was a safe harbour, very few remained on board. Which meant…

You blinked and a slow grin spread on your lips as the realisation dawned on you. Ordinarily you would have just laid as long as possible but this was your chance to have time with Shanks without it just being in bed or with the constant chance of interruptions. Slowly you adjusted your position and managed to push yourself up just enough to smile at Shanks, amusement growing when his calm expression immediately shifted into one of childish annoyance. Even asleep your presence was something he was keenly attuned to and the added distance-no matter how small- was felt. “Shanks, wake up.”

“Just five more minutes, love.” Shanks mumbled, trying to pull you back against him again. You let out a soft breathy laugh and leant in just to press a quick kiss against his cheek.

“Shanks,” you sang out pulling back a little more this time, grinning when he pouted and cracked his eyes open. “Listen, no crew.”

“No crew,” Shanks repeated, his eyes sharpening just enough to show you he was waking. You began to inch closer to the edge of the bed, smiling the more Shanks’ expression shifted as he watched your movements. He wasn’t ready to get out of bed just yet and if he was he needed convincing.

“Lucky’s not here to guard the kitchen.” You coaxed him softly and Shanks grinned at the sparkle in your eyes, already anticipating the words forming in your mouth. “Let’s make pancakes!”

With a grin Shanks immediately followed you out of bed and to the empty kitchen. Any time Lucky left his inner sanctum unsupervised you and Shanks took it upon yourselves to show you were capable cooks.

By the time the both of you managed to make an edible batch of pancakes there was flour and batter on your skin and dusted in your hair, and all over the kitchen. With the kitchen looking like a canon ball hit you you and Shanks sat happily together, at peace and smiling, only focussed on the other and already planning what else to do with the limited alone time together before the crew made their presences known again.

SMOKER

Everyone knew Smoker was a gruff, abrasive, typically no nonsense man. If anyone thought lighthearted, soft, calming his face usually wouldn’t be the first thing that came to mind. Smoker knew how he was perceived, he was aware fully of his personality. Which was why it left him confused at times in how it came to be that you reciprocated his feelings and gave him a chance. Even more puzzling to him was that you continued to stay with him, always smiling and enjoying his company. Enjoying him. You were both busy with your constant workloads. Smoker being on long missions more than you meant the quality time together was sparse and when he did have his paperwork caught up on and had a day off, more often than not he was tired. Still you never complained and as Smoker glanced at you as you made coffee for your both, his frown deepened.

You approached the sofa and handed him his coffee, made exactly how he liked it, smiling softly as you settled down to lounge beside him. Smoker immediately adjusted his own position to let you settle your back against his chest. Wordlessly he handed you the morning paper and a pen. This was the routine it seemed, you worked through the crossword and he let himself relax from a long mission. Now that he thought about it, really thought about it, the whole thing seemed unfair. Sometimes he barely made conversation with you, especially if the mission had been a long and stressful one. Smoker sighed and dropped his arm to rest loosely around you. You let out a soft hum and lay your head against him more, sipping on your drink and pen absently tapping against the paper as you read over the clues. After a while he spoke up. “Is this okay?”

“Hm?” You asked, turning your head to look at him gently. Then you smiled broadly. “More than okay. You’re very comfy to lean against. You’re like a fluffy, smokey cloud.”

“That’s…reassuring but that’s not what I meant.” Smoker cleared his throat, glancing away for a moment. When he looked back at you again, you’d sat up and turned to face him. Your smile now turned to worry. “I meant is this okay with us? Are you happy that this is how we spend our alone time?”

“What’s wrong with it?” You asked curiously and Smoker felt relief to see your worry had receded now that he had explained himself a little better. “How should it be?”

“Well I don’t know…I just don’t want you missing out on exciting dates like the others seem to constantly talk about.”

“Ah, you’ve been listening to your subordinates again.” You mused with a growing grin. “I think we live exciting enough lives as it is. Getting to just put our feet up and relax? That’s the best, Smoker and it’s made perfect when I have you here with me. I’m happy, are you?”

“Yes, very happy.” Smoker admitted with a small smile pulling at his lips, feeling like a weight had been lifted. With a small nod and satisfied smile you returned to your previous position while Smoker leant back and let his eyes close as the usual tranquility settled over you both again. “Oh, you should know this one: ‘another word for adorable’…What do you think?”

“Cute?” Smoker guessed, cracking an eye open to see you’d craned your head back to look at him with a playful grin.

“Nope…” You laughed, lifting your paper to show you’d already answered the clue, filling the spaces to read ’S-M-O-K-E-R-♡‘

Smoker blinked at the answer and then at you, feeling the tips of his ears heat and tinge a light pink as he quickly grabbed a cushion and lightly hit you on the head with it as your giggles filled the room. He allowed himself a small chuckle of his own as he admitted to himself that yes, the time with you, no matter what it was you did was more than ‘okay.’

——————————————-

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save-the-villainous-cat · 2 months ago

Text

pt. 1, pt. 2

“…did you know that death as a result of surgical intervention is the third leading cause of death worldwide?”

“Please,” the hero said. They took the villain’s hand. “Please, don’t say that.”

“I don’t want you to get your hopes up,” the villain said. “It’s pretty common. I’m not exempt from that.”

They stared at each other.

The villain was covered in bandages. Bruises everywhere. They looked tired, they looked sick.

Although the hero knew them waking up was enough of a miracle, they couldn’t bear the thought of parting with the villain this quickly again. They were here. They were in front of them. They had survived a surgery most had doubted to be successful.

“You’ll be fine,” the hero said. “You’ll be okay.”

“I don’t think my body can handle this anymore. I’m in so much pain and I…I feel so weak. There are so many wounds, I cannot walk, I can’t eat…I…I’m sorry, but I don’t think I will make it.” The villain’s eyes looked sunken in, sad, devastated.

And once again, once again, the hero had to swallow their tears.

“No,” they whispered. “Please. You said you’d stay with me.”

“I’m sorry,” the villain said.

When the hero had heard the news, they had jumped out of bed - despite their own broken leg - to stumble into the room where the villain was recovering, just to catch a glimpse of them. To see them, to touch them. To know they were here and not under the concrete. Several nurses had to drag the hero back to their own room.

And now, the villain was saying this. They were saying all these horrible things. The hero clenched their fists, their bottom lip was trembling.

“If I had—”

“None of that, please.” The villain took in a weak raspy breath. Their eyes found the hero’s and their gaze softened, softened like the world did when spring came. “Oh, dear. You are so wonderful.”

The hero forced themselves to maintain eye contact, but the tears blurred their vision.

“I want you to find some peace, okay?” The villain took the hero’s hand, but there was no strength in their grip. Not even the tiniest bit. “Whatever it is, I would like you to find peace in what you do.”

“I-”

“I’ll admit, my heart is a very delicate thing. I knew I would fall for you from the very beginning, I didn’t really have a say in it — after all, you are so easy to love. I kept it to myself because I knew I had no right to impose and I didn’t think i was worthy of your attention, at least of all your affection.” The villain smiled, as if they were going to share a gentle secret with the hero. “I was ready for vulnerability, but I wouldn’t dare to expect the same from you, I couldn’t bring myself to burden you with the heaviness of my feelings.”

“Please…” The hero closed their eyes, but opened them quickly again to look at their dear villain. Their dear saviour.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t leave much of a choice to you back then,” the villain said. “But I would choose this path again. Every single time, even if it meant I had died right there, even if it meant I could have never said this to you. No matter the outcome, you being alright is everything that matters to me.”

“I am not okay, though,” the hero whispered. Their voice was breaking. “I am really not okay. Don’t you know I like you, too? Don’t you know I…”

“I’m sorry,” the villain said again. “I suppose I am taking the easy way out. I didn’t mean to put all this sorrow onto you.”

They paused and all that echoed in the room were those shattering sobs the hero made.

How on earth were they supposed to move on? Just like that? This was going to haunt them for the rest of their life. They’d never be the same, they would never be able to love again.

They had made a grave mistake by watching the villain from the sidelines, letting life happen to them, not daring to say a word, not being honest about their feelings.

They could have been together. For an entire year, they could have made so many memories, they could have done so much.

“Please, don’t be afraid to love again,” the villain said. Now, their grip had a little bit more strength in it. “Please, don’t be afraid of love. Promise me to love every single breath you take. Promise me to fall in love with rainy days. To love the sound of birds. The way you cook your favourite meal. Please, do not hesitate to love…to love another person. To fall in love with someone, please don’t be afraid of that. Do not abandon what I cherish about you so much. Don’t abandon the love you hold.”

The hero couldn’t do this. They couldn’t take this pain any longer. This was a nightmare they needed to wake up from. This wasn’t true, this wasn’t real. It couldn’t be. It couldn’t be.

“Promise me. You have to promise me, will you?”

The hero blinked the tears out of their eyes.

“I do,” the hero said. They stood up and leaned over the bed. They touched the villain’s cheeks with the utmost care. “But only if you promise me to fight. Please, don’t leave me again.”

“I will,” the villain said.

“Alright,” the hero whispered. They leaned over the villain’s broken form even further and kissed them as gently as they could. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

The hero stayed with them, even as the villain’s condition worsened. Even as their organs started to fail and as they passed away a week later.

The hero stayed with them and they kept their promise, although they were convinced they could never love another person like that ever again.

#wow!#writing snippet #heroxvillain snippet #heroxvillain prompt #heroes and villains #hero #villain #hero x villain #heroxvillain #request

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fyuyushia · 29 days ago

Text

Capture Target: You!

Jinah's getting suspicious! She asks why he's suddenly bothering to dress up, Jinwoo argues it's not unusual.

Link to the Masterlist

I'm so sorry for the long drought folks I was suffering from writer's block💔💔

Jinwoo stares at his reflection, scrutinizing every single mishap he notices. Fixing his hair for the umpteenth time, he clicks his tongue in annoyance.

He didn't peg himself to be the type to worry about appearance too much, but the system. As always, the system, had caused him to overthink this matter too much.

[Tip: make sure to dress accordingly! Lack of care will cause a loss of points. Dun dun dun dun]

Was this enough? Did he look decent? Certainly this won't warrant a loss of points. Hopefully.

This would only be a casual meet up at the park, a moment of respite for you two who've been swaddled with work these past few days. You'd finally be able to pet the bears and he'd finally be able to see you—and by that he means to see how this new dynamic would affect your conversations with him.

Meeting you meant more AP—more AP meant he could clear the quest faster and get the rewards faster(said rewards were skills and a weapon with cringe-worthy names that didn't quite match his aesthetics. But it's fine, Jinwoo's not picky. If what he gets are functional then he doesn't care about the name.)

It's only that. Really. Only that.

He stares. Really stares.

Jinah walks in at just the right time. And she—gasp—sees her brother looking at himself in the mirror. Checking himself out and get this—he actually made an effort to look presentable.

He's fixing his hair and collar and everything—picking apart everything wrong that the mirror reflected back to him.

Jinah thinks it's the end of the world. But does she show it? Of course. Of course she does.

"What are you doing?"

Jinwoo hums, not at all bothered by her presence. "Do you think I look good?"

Jinah recoils—physically, spiritually, and emotionally recoils—like her brother had just bit her and admitted to being a zombie in disguise. She lets out a loud gasp, tumbles backwards five steps, and puts a hand to her chest in a dramatic fashion.

"You... I can't believe it—you actually looked at yourself in the mirror! You're actually trying to look good!" She narrows her eyes, clutching the doorknob to balance herself after the damage the sight had just given her.

"Mom! Jinwoo's being possessed! I can't believe this!" She cries, half teasing half serious.

Jinwoo deadpans. Really now? He's asking very seriously here—he does not want to be met with Jinah acting like it's something that only happens once in a blue moon. He does take care to look decent—just not with this much effort.

The effort he put wasn't even that much—atleast he thinks so. Did he overdo it? He looks at the

"Stop being dramatic and just answer me."

"I can't—" she grits her teeth. "Is the world ending? You've been acting weird lately!"

Jinwoo takes a deep breath, and exhales through his nose. Dealing with Jinah's antics was always a new experience.

He doesn't answer, only stare at her and wait for her to finish her theatrics and give him actually decent advice.

When she finally slows her breathing into a calm rhythm and stands upright once more(it took a lot of time. Now he's worried about keeping you waiting despite it being 30 minutes before the agreed meeting time.) she dons a serious expression—lips curled into a thin line as she furrows her brows.

"You're serious?"

He nods. Straightens his back, and begins to expect her judgement—trusting her to be the more fashion conscious of them two.

Jinah hums, hand on her chin as she scrutinizes him, grading his outfit like a master designer.

"You look..." She pauses, waiting for dramatic tension.

"Decent." She beams. "You look like a normal human being for once. That's the best you can do and that's fine!"

Jinah grins, patting him on the shoulder with a reassuring slap. "You'll be fine. You have your personality. You're a good man—you'll woo whoever you're gonna go on a date with."

Jinwoo stiffens, not visibly, just slightly noticeable. "It's not a date." He narrows his eyes, leaning down as Jinah musses up his hair wait purposeful strokes to allow her easier reach.

"Mhm of course it's not." She did not sound convinced. "You wouldn't be looking like you were trying to impress someone if it was."

"You don't sound convinced."

"That's because I'm not."

Well, that was fast. An exasperated sigh leaves him in the midst of a defeated smile.

"Tell me honestly: who are you going out with?"

And there came the million dollar question.

Whilst on the outside he remained cool and relaxed—every bit the description of level headed. But Jinah knew her brother—and she would not be fooled by any attempts at hiding something from her.

Especially a romantic partner.

"Just someone." Jinwoo says. It's safe. Easy. Normal. At least he thinks it is—he wouldn't know, he's not one to indulge in romance.

Jinah narrows her eyes. He can already feel the clock chiming to his death. "Someone? Just someone?"

He holds his breath. "Yeah."

"And that someone made you actually look at yourself in the mirror and bother looking presentable—which you only do during parent conference meetings by the way—and even bother to ask me 'how do I look?'"

Well, technically it was the system pushing him to look decent—not him. It's not entirely done out of his own volition. "That's not relevant."

"Not relevant? Really?" She crosses her arms, leaning against the doorframe with a smug grin. "Really now? Really? Seriously?"

Jinwoo sighed, already regretting asking her. He glances at the time—worrying that he might be late to the agreed time—fortunately, he still had at least half an hour before the agreed meeting. And though this meant he was already preparing an hour before the agreed time—we don't dwell on that. Just don't.

"It's just a meet up with a long time friend, that's all."

"Oh really?"

Jinwoo glances at his watch once more—playing the role of someone rushing and nearing the late status in hopes of getting his sister of his tracks.

Fortunately for him, it worked. Unfortunately for him—it only delayed his suffering until much later. Something Jinwoo would come to regret after returning from the da—hang out.

It's a hang out.

"Alright, I'll let you go for now." She emphasizes the last word—making sure he understood that this was not done out of willful ignorance. "But when you get back..."

Jinwoo's already out and about and ready to leave, refusing to dwell where his sister stood out of fear that she might start dissecting everything, he's done that's remotely suspicious in her view.

Jinwoo walks away from his room and bids a short goodbye to his mother—quick to get away as far as he could without appearing too desperate.

Sung Jinwoo arrives just ten minutes before the agreed meeting time.

Perhaps a bit too early, but his mother would approve—it's rude to make people wait after all.

In the meantime, he looks around the park. Open and windy, not overcrowded with people—but it wasn't entirely deserted either.

Letting out his ice bears in an open place is bound to spell trouble. Though they're harmless, the civillians might think otherwise and cause unnecessary trouble by stirring up unease.

Realizing this, Jinwoo summons Beru, tasking him with searching for a less open place that's not too far from the park. Whilst Beru busied himself with searching, Jinwoo occasionally backreads through your messages.

[Note: You haven't finished skimming through old history!]

A window pops out randomly, showcasing a picture of his old phone below.

He quirks a brow, confusion first, then cones recognition.

Ah—the phone he got a few weeks back.

Looking back now, his whole endeavor of bothering to take his old phone to learn what would be the perfect first message to send seems ridiculous. Why did he do that again?

He stares at it thoughtfully. He never did get to finish backreading—too busy talking with you through texts instead. Not reminiscing about history, but creating another memory.

The old phone was left to rot in his inventory once more, forgotten once he had the present you to talk with.

However, clearly that was the wrong move when the system themselves told him to continue reading through it.

Was the content written and kept inside truly that important? A question for the ages—waiting to be answered.

"Ah, Jinwoo!"

Jinwoo looks up, already putting a face to the voice calling. His assumptions are not proven wrong as your figure graces his peripheral, rushing to him with an easy smile.

"You're here early."

He returns your smile, his posture fixing itself when the person he has to impress—for the sake of the quest of course—arrives at last.

You take a glance at your time, then place your attention back on him. "Did I make you wait long? There's still five minutes left so I thought I still had time. Did I get it wrong?"

"No," he answers. "I just got here myself. I didn't want to keep you waiting."

A blink, and you don't deny the little butterfly creeping inside you.

"Ah, is that so?" Offering him a closed eye smile, you ease into the scenario at hand.

[Achievement unlocked!]

[Gentleman series: Don't keep them waiting!

Arrive earlier at a date before the agreed time.]

Fortunately for the dark haired man, he's gotten used to sudden pop ups induced by the system—enough to not let his eyes drift over it and possibly risk being seen as schizophrenic by you.

Jinwoo feels your gaze sweep over him—and that alone was enough for him to fix his posture and more subconsciously. How silly, it's not as though he'd take your evaluation to heart.

"You look like you're dressed to impress." You comment, tone cheery.

Your words—something he hadn't expected—made him pause. Was that negative..?

He looks at the window showcasing your affinity rate.

[28 ( + 0.5 )]

It doesn't look negative—and he hopes it isn't negative. However, the comment does make him ponder.

He reflects on himself. Hair slicked up, a button down shirt that matched his slacks, and clean leather shoes instead of the usual sneakers he wore to dungeon raiding.

All this dressing up for just half a point?

Ah.

Jinwoo tugged at his collar, heat crawling up his neck as he realized he looked like someone who was about to deliver a TED talk. In a public park. Worse: with bears that weren't quite bears. Even worse: with you as the sole audience.

Closing his eyes, Jinwoo comes to realize that his greatest wish might be to wring the neck of whoever made this wretched system and demand payment for humiliation instead of something grand like saving the world.

"Too much?"

Your brows lift. "Hm? No, no! It's fine—it looks good!" You quickly reply, waving your hands in defense. "It's just—you look like someone trying very hard to impress at a blind date. Or maybe attend a press conference."

Blinking, he brushes off the creeping shame upon noticing the difference in outfit. "That's specific."

Whilst yours remained comfortable and easy to move in, his clothes—in your words—seemed more like him preparing for a formal meeting. Dreadfully enough—even looked like he was preparing for a blind date. He regrets letting the system get into his head—how foolish.

He should've just worn the damn sneakers.

Jinwoo makes a mental note to never listen to the system from this point on.

"So," you bounce on the balls of your feet, hands clasped together in barely contained excitement. "The bears. Where are the bears? Let me see the bears."

"You sure are excited." He quirks a brow, amused by your enthusiasm. "Calm down they won't run away."

"They won't." You nod. "But every minute spent not burying my hands in their fur is a minute wasted!"

You beam. Then promptly pause. Stiffly—robotically—you tilt your head.

"Wait. Do they have fur?"

Jinwoo stills and ponders your words. Did they have fur?

He thinks back to his previous encounters with the ice bears. Their initial form had one—but did their shadow forms have them? He hadn't really called upon them since he had kaisel—but did they?

"They do." I think. He hoped they had one—they better have one.

"Great! More immersion! I was worried they'd just be whispy shadows I can't touch."

"You don't have to worry about that—you can hold them just fine." I think.

My king—I have arrived, bearing forth great news! I’ve located a sufficiently isolated clearing fit for noble beasts such as our ice bears to frolic and for milady to pet their great heads without inciting civilian panic!

Beru's voice rings inside his head like a medieval notification. Without ceremony, he nods discreetly and shifts his attention towards you.

Jinwoo clears his throat. "I found a private spot not far from here—if it's alright with you let's go there."

"Private? Why?" You perk up, tilting your head. "You're not planning on murdering me in broad daylight in the guise of privacy, are you?"

"That's dramatic even for you." He deadpans, flicking you in the forehead—careful with the force.

Yelping, you bite your tongue as he chides you for your overactive imagination. "That was uncalled for!"

He looks at his shadow for a split second, and then back to you, then towards the people lounging and exercising in the park. "This place is too open. Letting my shadows out here would likely cause public disturbance."

You hum, rubbing the spot he flicked with aggression. "That makes sense. If everyone saw just how cute they are it would certainly crowd he park."

"No, I think it would be chaotic for other reason." He deadpans, watching you nod along as if he said something deeply profound.

"Well? Lead the way!"

Jinwoo's gaze lingers on you for a moment made too long. Then, smoothly, he takes his stand beside you.

"Hold still for a sec."

Before you can ask why, an arm already wraps itself around your waist, loose but firm, and effectively bringing you closer to him.

You gasp, reeling from the sudden closure. Heat rose up your cheeks, eyes wide when he wordlessly wrapped an arm.

"Huh?!"

It all happened in a flash. One moment, you were being pulled closer by Sung Jinwoo, and the next, you suddenly felt like you were sinking down the ocean as gravity brought you down the ground. You instinctively squeezed your eyes shut, feeling yourself submerge in a sea of darkness before abruptly rising up on the shore once more.

"You can open your eyes."

A beat—or two—passes before you reluctantly peel one eye open, heart thrumming both from the proximity and the sudden usage of magic.

He pulls himself away, taking a step back further from where you stood(shame). Your legs felt wobbly at first, a sense of vertigo washing over you as you regained your balance.

"What was that?" Came your question after a few rounds of checking if you were alright and not dead. "I feel like a cat who just got thrown in a cold bucket."

Jinwoo—traitorous Jinwoo—tilts his head as if you were the odd one for not adjusting faster.

"A shortcut. The way from here to there was quite lengthy—I assumed you'd appreciate arriving here faster." He pauses, acting like he just realized that ah, maybe he should've asked beforehand. Right—there's such a thing called consent. Truly horrible of him to forget. "Was I wrong?"

"A warning would've been good! And you still haven't answered the question by the way."

"What question?"

You cross your arms, trying to hide the way your knees are still trembling under you. "What was that? I thought you were just going to walk me over. Not whatever just happened!"

He blinks, and then does the equivalent reaction of eureka hitting a genius from the olden times. "Ah—that was shadow exchange. Just a transportation spell, it's nothing important."

Your mouth gapes open. Now in normal circumstances—that would indeed be normal. He's an S rank hunter so of course it's expected for him to have some tricks up his sleeve. However, you weren't a hunter; you were just a regular person who didn't have a lick of mana inside you to use magic. So of course, it surprised you. Immensely.

"Normal? Nothing important? I felt like I was being kidnapped into some sort of dimensional rift!"

A shadow twitches near his foot—Beru, no doubt deeply insulted by your phrasing. How dare you crudely describe something so...marvelous? So skillfull? So majestic?

Though you might own the favor(you don't. Jinwoo tells him it's not like that but who cares. The heart wants what it wants and Beru presumes to know his king a lot. Enough to recognize his yearning at least.) of his king—that doesn't mean you can just crudely word the fantastical prowess of his own master!

Jinwoo ignores Beru's tantrum entirely. In spite of Beru's immature raging, Jinwoo appeared sheepish in front of you.

With a hand rubbing the back of his neck, he gives an awkward grin. "Sorry—I'll make sure to warm you next time."

Next time?

That's implying there'd be a next time, and you don't quite like the way he phrases it so easily. You don't quite like the way your pulse quickens at such simple words either. Traitorous heart.

How dare they feel something? Hope for something?

"Just give me the bears." You huff out, feigning ignorance to your very own feelings.

[31 ( + 2.5 )]

Yet little did you know that all your attempts at keeping things secret actually did little in hiding your bubbling affection.

"Stop talking as if they're illegal goods—that sounds shady."

Jinwoo feigns ignorance at the popping windows. He feigns ignorance to the small skip to his heartbeat that suddenly erupted—chalking it up to simple surprise.

He's anything but straightforward when it comes to his feelings.

Because you were a friend. A dear friend from his past. A dear friend he's pined for in the past—a dear friend who didn't reciprocate his feelings, nothing more, nothing less.

So even when he summons the bears with a sigh when you ask nicely, so even when you quickly swoon and go heart eyed for the roguish looking bears, he only takes a deep breath and sinks everything he feels down the drain.

"Aww cute little bears!" He watches you coo over a bear of your height as it crouches, and twice the more taller when they stand with a deadpan. "Are you hug friendly?"

A nuzzle of their nose on your hand makes you giggle. "Of course you are!"

[34 ( + 3 )]

No, he wasn't smiling. Damn it.

He just found an aspect to exploit to hopefully grind affection.

Taglist: @blackcat-star @daiyanomochi @soft-dots @snowy-violet @kokominari @ssolarsystm @2dmenfr @baby-bread-in @awwwia @coffeeisbehindyou @rai-xxx @sanchann @ilovestarwholock218 @simpingpandas @smellysluna @tanspostsblog @sauerhundz @justanotherweeb666 @stormnightingale @tomiokx @mentaltrouble2201

#ᯓᡣ𐭩fyuyu's works #sung jinwoo x reader #solo leveling x reader #jinwoo sung x reader #manhwa x reader #sung jinwoo x y/n #sung jinwoo x you

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angelfleurry · 9 months ago

Note

Could you do dangonronpa 2 cast kiss head cannons

SDR2 Kiss Headcanons!:

Hii, Anon!! I wasn’t sure if you meant first kiss or just general kiss headcanons, so I just did general. If you want first kiss headcanons, feel free to request again!.

Spoilers ahead <3

Hajime Hinata:

♡ My guy is so awkward bless him.

♡ Does he need a reason to kiss you? Is there an appropriate moment? Is it okay if he just…

♡ Oh, oh you’ve kissed him, okay.

♡ Okay, his turn.

♡ He’s so nervous, but simultaneously so very eager to kiss you.

♡ He tends to lean in, but he does it so awkwardly that you can’t help but giggle.

♡ He kind of pauses at that, and just looks at you for a moment.

♡ It’s only when he sees that kind expression on your face that he realises he’s okay.

♡ That’s when he just goes for it.

♡ Doesn’t kiss you very often in public, if not at all, he’s more of a behind closed doors kind of guy.

♡ He’s very romantic with it, it surprises you.

♡ Always has a hand supporting you, even if it’s not necessary, as he kisses you.

♡ Hajime’s kisses aren’t short, but they’re not long, they’re just at that perfect middle length.

♡ Once he figures out how to get there, that is.

♡ Doesn’t know what to do when you kiss him.

♡ He just sits there, processing, looking at you as his face reddens.

♡ He kind of debates kissing you back in his head, and half the time he goes for it, and the rest he just dips his head and pulls you close.

♡ Is very much a lip-kisser, it just feels right.

♡ If you need a bit of comfort, he’ll kiss your forehead.

Nagito Komaeda:

♡ It took a while to get to this stage.

♡ There were moments, just split seconds, where everything seemed to be building up to it.

♡ But then, the moment would be lost.

♡ Nagito would start to talk, or some interference would occur.

♡ It did frustrate you a little bit, but you knew that was just your eagerness talking.

♡ Truthfully, you knew it was to be expected, so you just decided to wait it out.

♡ It’s not like you were reliant on the idea, it was more so you just wanted to.

♡ But, if there’s one thing about love, is that you must pay mind to the other person.

♡ And you, my darling, did remarkably at that.

♡ You knew the time would come, and as long as everything else about your relationship was healthy and happy, you were in no rush.

♡ Eventually you both got past that initial stage, but we can save that memory for another time.

♡ For a majority of the time, Nagito’s a very hesitant kisser.

♡ What I mean by this, is that he’d rather wait for you to initiate something that even dare to do it himself.

♡ However, once you do it, he’s so ecstatic.

♡ If you could peek into his brain, all you’d be able to see would be soft pink bubbles fizzing up to the surface, popping energetically.

♡ He feels so hesitant to even say the words, as if he’s being too entitled, but he’ll ask you to kiss him again.

♡ Sometimes, he has waves where he’s incredibly clingy, and this will be where he allows himself to initiate contact first.

♡ Treats you as if you were a porcelain doll, even if he’s really needy for contact.

♡ It’s as if he thinks you’ll break should he be too quick, or too harsh.

♡ Forehead kisses are really special for him.

♡ They make him feel so safe, so cherished, even if he struggles to comprehend that fact.

♡ If you kiss him on the lips, that’s it, he’s so bewildered every time.

♡ Always raises a hand to the spot you kissed him, and just sits there for a second, processing.

♡ When you look at him, though, he’s smiling.

Kazuichi Souda:

♡ He can be such an awkward kisser, it’s adorable really.

♡ Kazuichi’s very eager once that initial barrier’s been moved past.

♡ Sometimes, you won’t even be able to fully enjoy it as he kisses you so very quickly.

♡ He can’t help himself.

♡ But when it’s at that reasonable pace, it’s actually very tender.

♡ Like, you can tell the man desperately wants to kiss you, but there’s such an edge of sweetness to it.

♡ It does something to your heart, honestly.

♡ Likes to play little games where you both go back and forth giving each other light pecks.

♡ He’s got a preference for kissing your lips, but if you tell him there’s somewhere else you enjoy being kissed, he’ll gladly oblige.

♡ If he’s going somewhere where it means he won’t be with you, he always kisses you goodbye.

♡ He’ll do it in front of his friends, and your friends, so long as that’s okay with you.

♡ He just loves to show off that he has a partner!!

♡ Enjoys being able to kiss you when you’re both cuddled up together.

♡ Please, please, surprise him with kisses!

♡ Give him that peck on the cheek, kiss his forehead, go for the lips!

♡ Makes him all giddy!!

♡ It’s so funny how he can be so composed in public, or as composed as Kazuichi can be, but then behind closed door’s, he’s so bashful.

♡ His face goes bright red, even if he tries to act cool about it.

♡ But, he can’t shake that quivery smile as he wraps his arms around you.

♡ “You’re so cute, ya’know that?” he’ll ask, and all you can do is laugh.

Fuyuhiko Kuzuryuu:

♡ He’s very quick with it.

♡ I just can’t picture him being one to regularly kiss.

♡ It’s nice, of course it is, but it’s just not something he initiates.

♡ He won’t complain if you kiss him though, just make sure it’s okay with him first.

♡ He doesn’t regularly want to be kissed like that, and you respect that.

♡ If he does kiss you, it’s very quick.

♡ It’s not harsh, but it’s quick.

♡ It’s like a swift peck and then he’s out.

♡ Always gives you kind words of acknowledgement as he does it though, he’s not neglectful.

♡ He doesn’t really know what to do with himself, so he prefers not to get too snuggly.

Gundham Tanaka:

♡ Nose kisses, NOSE KISSES.

♡ He’s not kissed anyone before you, so he’s still learning about his preferences!

♡ But, he’s discovered he’s really fond of nose kisses.

♡ It’s not as nerve-wracking as lip kissing is, but it’s still a way he can physically show he loves you.

♡ Finds it really endearing when you tell him to close his eyes so you can kiss his nose.

♡ He does the same to you, and you find at just as sweet.

♡ He’s also fond of nose-brushing.

♡ Like, the both of you just gently rubbing noses together.

♡ It’s calming for him.

♡ He’s also fond of kissing your hand.

♡ It’s just so formal, but so wonderfully romantic.

♡ The perfect way for a dark lord such as himself to show his affection to you.

♡ Is convinced you’re performing some kind of ritual on him.

♡ Is it really this normal to feel so very…fuzzy once you kiss him?

TeruTeru Hanamura:

♡ Oh my goodness, he’s so down.

♡ We all know Teru’s got a major issue when it comes to more deeply intimate shenanigans, but what may be a surprise is that he’s honestly a big sap when it comes to physical affection.

♡ Kiss him anywhere, he’ll welcome it.

♡ Only time I can picture him not wanting to is when he’s extremely, and I mean extremely, stressed. Just try and help out if you can then.

♡ However, this is a very rare occurrance.

♡ After all, it’s TeruTeru - he’s more than happy to indulge himself in your affections.

♡ But, that doesn’t mean he won’t do the same for you.

♡ The second you start dating, this man will in fact try to be affectionate with you.

♡ Once it’s specified you’re okay with kissing, that’s it.

♡ Is very much kissing you once you wake up.

♡ It’s probably his favourite way to greet you, even if you’ve not left the same room.

♡ It’s so nice to see a smile start to form on your face after he does it, and it only encourages him to kiss you again.

♡ Is no stranger to kissing your hand either.

♡ “Oh, sweetheart, you’ve got something on your face,” he’ll tell you, smiling, “Let me…”

♡ That sly fox!

♡ It’s very hard to not be all giggly once he’s done kissing you, even if it’s just a simple peck on the cheek.

♡ Has a surprising touch of wholesomeness to him in this regard.

Nekomaru Nidai:

♡ He finds it adorable.

♡ The idea you want to kiss him sends him to a laughing fit, but it’s all from a kind place.

♡ Is very much open to it.

♡ He’s very awkward with it though.

♡ A very messy kisser, but it’s alright!

♡ He wants to hold you, but he’s a little worried he’ll be too heavy-handed.

♡ Kind of guide him if that’s what you want, and then he’ll settle.

♡ Forehead kisses are a cherished form of affection.

♡ His lip kissing skills need a bit of work, but you don’t mind guiding.

Ultimate Imposter:

♡ Oh, this one’s difficult!

♡ He’s not sure whether to be himself, or be the person he’s impersonating.

♡ Surely you know, right?

♡ I can’t imagine him letting you enter a relationship with him without informing you of his identity.

♡ Or, lack of thereof.

♡ As a result, I feel like his kisses are lacking in something.

♡ He wants to kiss you, and he will, but he’s blocking his proper emotions.

♡ Still, he’s rather soft about it.

♡ Just tell him you love him afterwards, it’ll give him a bit of ease.

♡ If you’re to kiss him, he’ll be happy, but he can’t quite show it.

♡ Likes it when you kiss his hands.

♡ It feels strange when you kiss him on his lips.

♡ He loves the feeling, but it takes him aback.

♡ How on Earth can a man so devoid of any identity still be able to be loved so tenderly…?

♡ Does he cry or not, that is the question.

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chrishme · 5 months ago

Text

Either Way | Jim Halpert x reader

summary: the office is shocked when you show up to work in a fancy red dress, however, your boyfriend Jim doesn't seem to mind.

warnings: reader is sexualized? michael being michael, kevin being kevin, dwight being dwight.

a/n: i orginally wrote this a long time ago and decided to change some things and post it. not proofread so sorry for any mistakes, enjoy!

•·.·''·.·•*ੈ✩‧₊˚.ೃ࿐*ೃ༄·˚ ༘ˏˋ°•*⁀➷⋆·˚ ༘

You always wore appropriate attire to work. Your normal attire normally consisted of sweaters or botton up tops with work pants. However, today was going to be different. You lived in a very tiny apartment. The thing was small and cramped, but hey, it was home. The building didn't home a washing machine nor did your apartment. Thankfully though there was a dry cleaners down the block.

The night before, you drove there quickly after work to go wash your clothes. You had a tendency to procrastinate with things like this, one of the many things Jim liked to tease you about. However, when when you showed up, it was closed. Apparently, the place was having lighting problems, which caused the washing machines and dryers to not be able to work. You would’ve drove to another dry cleaners but it was already so late, and everything was closed. So you only had one option. Your red dress.

The dress has stayed in the back of your closet for the past year. You had worn it once, way before you met Jim, back in your single and clubbing days. After that the dress stayed locked away, your normal attire around Jim being work attire or pajamas when he would come over to sleepover. In fact, you don't even think Jim had ever seen you in such attire like this red dress. You can only imagine his shocked dorky face he would display when you walked in. You giggled at the thought.

You take the dress out of your closet and hang it on your door, thankfully there’s no wrinkles. tYou couldn't lie, it was a very nice dress. It was bright red, and the length went slightly below the knee. The front was cute low, showing some cleavage in some angles. It hugged your curves beautifully. You sigh as you stare at yourself in the mirror. This was definitely not work attire.

You sigh and take the dress off, slipping on some pajamas, sending Jim a goodnight text, and drifting off into slumber.

The next morning you woke up late. You quickly scurry out of bed. “Shit shit shit.” Could this get any worse? Dwight will surely be up your ass for being late. You quickly put on the red dress, brushing out your hair and deciding to leave it down, not having any time to style it like you usually would. You quickly brushed your teeth, grabbing your bag and coat, hurrying out the door and to your car.

While on your way, your phone begins to ring. You look at it before grinning. Jim’s name popped up with a picture of the both of you. You answered, putting it on speaker phone and putting it in the cup holder. Safety first.

“Where are you? It’s 9:15. Michael is about to send Dwight out to check on you.” Jim stated anxiously, speaking lowly into the phone. You can now probably suspect that Dwight or Michael was around. You sigh, “Sorry. I woke up late. Don’t let Dwight leave the office. Oh, and please distract Michael when I come in.” You beg.

There is a slight pause from Jim, and you can picture his adorably confused face.

“Why?” He laughs lightly.

You smirk, “You’ll see. Okay love you see you soon.” You state, hanging up the call.

Back at the office, Jim gives his signature look to the camera.

You arrive at the office, walking in. You look at the window and see Jim talking to Michael in his office. You mentally thank him. You had a plan to try to keep your coat on for as long as possible because of your attire, but you soon realized that the office was rather toasty. You sigh, knowing you wouldn’t be comfortable with the coat on.

“Hey Pam.” You greet the receptionist . Pam smiles looking up at you, “Hey [y/n]...” her voice drawls out when you take off your coat. Her eyes widen. Seeing her, you quickly put the coat back on, covering back up. “Oh, is it really that bad? My dry cleaners shut down last night and all the other ones were closed. This is the only clean thing I had in my closet.” You panic.

“No, you look great [y/n] Its just, ya know...” she trails off, glancing to her left. You also look that way to see Kevin and Creed staring at you, well, the different parts of you. You sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose stressfully.

“Don’t stress. Maybe Kelly has extra clothes for you to wear.” Pam suggest. You nod, giving the thought to the idea. “Let’s go check.” She states getting up. You and Pam quickly head to the Annex. Jim see’s you out of the corner of his eye.

Kelly inspects your outfit. “I don’t see what’s wrong with it. It’s super cute.” Kelly says looking you up and down. You sigh, “Kelly, that’s not the point. The dress is cute but you know how the guys in the office can be. Please tell me you have something for me to wear.”

Kelly shakes her head, “Sorry [y/n]. I don’t have anything.”

Meredith speaks up, “Actually I might have a pair of clothes in my van.” Your face lights up, “Really! What kind of clothes?” You ask.

Meredith thinks, “Uh, a mini skirt and a milf t-shirt.”

You sigh, “Yea nevermind.”

Jim comes through the annex and over to Kelly’s desk. “Hey girls, what’s goin on?” You turn around, facing him. His eyes widen. He was definitely curious about the whole debacle on the phone before, but he wasn't expecting this.

“You look...wow.” Jim states. You smile innocently, “Is that a good wow or bad wow?” You smirk, walking towards him. Jim gulps, looking down at you as you look up at him with a innocent smile. Oh, you were so in for it later. “Oh, it’s a good wow. A very good wow.” His voice is breathy.

His hands go to your hips and he looks deeply into your eyes. Suddenly, realizing where he was. He jumps off of you, looking to the other girls of the office. They all stare at you guys with smiles on their faces.

“Uh, you look very good, [y/n]. That is all.” Jim extends his hand for you to shake. You laugh, “Well thank you good sir.” You shake his hand. A moment goes by, and your skin craves his touch, lips craving his. You can tell he felt it too by the look on his face.

“You know what, screw this.” He then grabs you be the face and kisses you passionately. You kiss back, smiling in between kisses. “Awwww.” Kelly drawls out. You and Jim separate, sending her a glance. She pouts, “Sorry.” You laugh and turn back to Jim, who looks at you in adoration. Your eyes widen when realization kicks in.

“Wait, if your here, where the hell is Michael?” You ask. Jim’s eyes widen. You both turn around. You watch in horror as everyone is surrounded at the annex window, watching. Kevin smiles and flashes a thumbs up your way. “Nice goin Jim.” He says, his famous smirk on his lips.

Dwight bursts through the doors, notepad in hand. “[y/n] you are late and wearing a very skippy dress. I’m gonna have to write you up.” Dwight says, doodling nonsense down on the paper. You raise an eyebrow at him, “Oh really? How are you allowed to do that?”

“It’s dress code. No offense [y/n] but those things are really distracting. Toby even said I should write you up.” Dwight says. You turn and glare at Toby, “Really Toby?” You ask with a scoff. Toby backs away, hands in his pockets and eyes to the floor, a sheepish grin on his face. "They are a distraction in the work place. It’s against dress code.”

“It’s literally a dress! I don’t understand the big deal. I’m a woman. I have breast. Deal with it!” You yell. The annex goes silent before the doors open again. Michael strolls in. You roll your eyes. Fantastic.

“What is going on here-“ Michael stops when he see’s you, his eyes immediately scanning you up and down. “Wow nice [y/n]. Is that what you’ve been hiding under those sweaters all the time?” Michael laughs, glancing at the camera. By this point your blood is boiling. “Oh my god!” You exclaim angrily, looking away from everyone, practically trying to hide. Jim catches your embarrassment and turns back to them.

“Ok! Can everyone stop talking about my girlfriends breast please. She’s uncomfortable and it’s honestly making me uncomfortable, alright?” He informs, voice broad but not mean or demanding. Kevin comes in the annex next. “How are you uncomfortable Jim? I bet those thing are nice and comfortable. Like a pillow.” He begins to giggle like a school boy.

That was the last straw for you. You turn and storm out of the annex, practically shoving Angela into the counter. “Hey!” She proclaims, giving you a dirty look before glaring unapprovingly at your outfit. You quickly head for the lobby, storming down the stairs and outside the establishment.

Jim watched you leave with a sigh. “Nice going Kev.” Jim says as he passes Kevin to go look for you. Kevin turns and shrugs. “What? I thought that would be a compliment.” Jim ignores him, following after you quickly, eager to make you feel better.

Pam sighs and crosses her arms, looking to Kevin in disapproval. “That’s not a compliment Kevin. You were basically sexualizing her.” Kevin turns, “Oh Pam, you’re just jealous that your boobs aren’t as big as [y/n]'s.” Pam glances at the camera in disbelief before looking down at her own chest.

Outside you sat on a curb near the doors of the warehouse, shivering against the cold. You were too enraged with anyone to have grabbed your coat. You turn and it’s hard to even let out a smile when Jim comes around the corner with his coat on, in his other hand he holds your coat as well, a sympathetic smile on his face.

When he gets to you he slips it on your shoulders, bringing some sort of warmth to your body. “Thanks.” You say bittersweetly.

“Eh no problem. Don’t want my girlfriend getting hypothermia” He chuckles, but it fades when you don’t do it back.

He sits down on the curb next to you. His body warmth feels good against your own, and you move in closer to him. His hand comes up and rests on your thigh, his thumb drawing circles along the skin. "I didn't mean to cause such a scene." You mumble with a laugh. Jim laughs back at you, wrapping his arm around your lower back, pushing you closer into him. You lean your head on his shoulder.

"I tried my best to keep Michael occupied, but you know how difficult that is." Jim explains to you with a laugh. You giggle, knowing that was true. Jim smiled at the sound of your laugh, pressing a chaste kiss against your forehead. You close your eyes and nuzzle into him. "You really do look beautiful in this dress." He compliments. You smile against him, "I'll try to wear it more, not in an office setting." You joke. Jim turns to face you, and you shiver when the warmth of his body leaves yours. He grabs the side of your face with a palm, hazel eyes boring into yours.

"I love you either way." he states before leaning down and giving you a kiss. Your eyes flutter closed, and your body melts into his. After that the two of you sit in comfortable silence, enjoying eachother’s warmth and company.

“C’mon. Let’s go back inside.” You say. Jim turns to you, an eyebrow raised. “Are you sure?” He asks. He was willing to stay out there all day with you if that’s what you wanted, and you knew that. You give him a warm smile, “Yes. I don’t want my boyfriend getting hypothermia.” You relay the joke he had made before. He chuckles, and you both make your way back inside the building.

The rest of the day at the office was normal. You had guessed your outburst from earlier made everyone want to stay away from you, which you didn’t mind. Kevin and Michael did walk over to your desk to apologize for their actions earlier. You happily accepted their apologies, Jim giving you a grin from across the room. You had guessed he had spoken to them about the displeasure you had with their comments.

After work, Jim came over to your apartment and you two watched some movies together. Although you did like the dress, it took you around five minutes to scramble into some pajamas, cuddling up with Jim on the couch.

“You look just as beautiful in pajamas, you know that?” The man teases you, popping a small peice of popcorn in his mouth. You smile and snuggle into him, “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

•·.·''·.·•*ੈ✩‧₊˚.ೃ࿐*ೃ༄·˚ ༘ˏˋ°•*⁀➷⋆·˚ ༘

291 notes · View notes

pinkmirth · 1 year ago

Note

Wait imagine being enemies to lovers with alucard

now, i love the sound of this! ( i think about it more than i should, tbh . . .) a mostly harmless , banter-like dynamic is what comes to mind, similar to what he’s got going on with trevor. you’re a sharp woman with an even sharper mouth, and as much as he admires your tenacity, alucard isn’t one to hold back from delivering his own petty retorts. you throw jabs at the vampiric man, and more often than not, he’ll bite.

at times, real disagreements ensue— over the proper way to effectively kill night creatures, how to reduce any casualties, how you think he’s passive, and how he sees you to be so incredibly brash. you’re defensive about doing things your way, as is he. you know how two people are just going at each other’s throats until they’ve found themselves face to face, chests heaving from the heat of their argument? yeah, that’s exactly where you find yourself now; alucard standing only inches before you, blonde brows drawn together with his cheeks dusted red from what you assume to be boiling rage.

once you finally acknowledge how slim the proximity between you is, you step away and coil your expression into one of distaste, attempting to mask the thrill of having him so close that his nose almost brushed yours. “you’re disgustingly pretentious,” you try snapping at him, though he can hear that bitter, mocking tone of your diminish. is it just him, or is he catching onto a bit of . . . softness? from someone like you, towards someone like him? it couldn't be. you can hardly stand him, anyway. he's sure that the only one harboring any affections, even in the slightest, is him. as much as you boil his blood and make his head spin, you're also able to make him laugh, motivate him to new heights. not that he'd ever admit it, though. you'd probably punch him square in the face.

“and you're far too stubborn. it wouldn't kill you to adapt, you know." he grunts, tucking a stray piece of hair behind his ear. would it be wrong of you to admit just how beautiful he is? "it might. i surely won't be taking my chances," you bump past him using your shoulder, and he scoffs upon impact. just as you attempt to zoom past the man, his lithe hand encircles your wrist and pulls you back into him.

against the wall is where you find yourself, with his tall, firm body keeping you pressed there. alucard's grasp is unrelenting, and he's far too strong for you to even try pulling away. his long, golden hair drapes over you, curtaining over you so that the only thing you can see is his cold, glowing eyes. "must you make everything so . . . fucking difficult?" you pray he can't hear it; the erratic thumping of your heart.

“unhand me, you fuck.” he does not. you've pushed him to the edge for the very last time. "why on earth do i put up with you?" he sourly chuckles, as though he's asking himself rather than you. he watches your shaken gaze scour his entire face— from his piercing eyes to his pale-pink lips. you're staring, hard. he much rather prefers gaining this kind of attention from you.

“then don't. i never asked you to." you spit, trying to yank away with no avail. he only shakes his head, closing in on you. at this rate, his lips and your own could practically touch.

“i can’t just leave you alone,” he rasps. you listen with a deep pause, and your breath is caught in your throat. “haven’t you noticed? as irksome as your company is, i can’t seem to go without it.” you finally understand— alucard, of all people, has taken a liking to you.

“so, you’re attached?” your laughter is taunting, and somehow, he’s come to love it. “unhealthily so.” he breathes out. his bottom lip grazes yours, and you shudder at even the slightest contact. god, how he’s already ruined you. “and what exactly will you do about that, alucard?” you call his name with a feigned amount of spite, and your lashes flutter up at him in that provoking way . . . fuck, he can feel himself getting harder beneath his trousers. alucard gives you this particular look, and that’s how you know he won’t be telling you— the man’s about to take initiative and show you, just as you’re always telling him to.

a deep, breathless kiss is what you get in response, one where his mouth are pressed to yours in a way where you can bite at his lower lip and he can groan into your mouth. he knew you’d like it this way— messy, heated, desperate. you suck at his tongue and cup his face, breaking away only after you’ve gotten a proper taste of him. you feel something firm nudge your thighs, and it gets you to peer down and take notice of his apparent bulge, straining at his fitted black pants.

“god, you’re pathetic,” your lips curve into a smile, teasingly taking his bottom lip between your teeth. you bring your knee up to press against his crotch, and his moan comes out sounding so broken. only the stars above could explain why your insults rouse him as much as they do. alucard pecks your lips once, then twice, with a quickness he knows will leave you chasing for more.

“for you, perhaps i am.”

#thanks so much for dropping by! mwuah 💋#꒰ঌ inbox.ᐟ ໒꒱#( anon.ᐟ )#ৎ୭ ⨾ alucard.ᐟ #꒰ঌ castlevania.ᐟ ໒꒱#꒰ঌ drabbles.ᐟ ໒꒱#꒰ঌ thirsts.ᐟ ໒꒱#alucard x reader #alucard castlevania #castlevania alucard #adrian tepes #adrian fahrenheit tepes #castlevania x reader #alucard smut #castlevania smut #adrian tepes smut #adrian tepes x reader

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too-much-tma-stuff · 1 year ago

Text

Finally Getting Help (pt 14)

Masterpost

“Do you want to go back to the manor, or do you want to go somewhere else?” Jason asked Danny after a few quiet minutes driving.

“Can we go out of Gotham? Somewhere quiet,” Jason hummed and nodded before switching the com on. “Hey Bruce, will you kill me if I take Danny camping for tonight?” He asked, he knew Danny loved the stars, being away from Gotham’s pollution for a night and getting to properly see the stars would probably help.

There was a pause and then Bruce’s soft response. “No, I know you’ll take care of him, Jaylad. Will you stop by the manor so Alfred can make sure you have everything you need?”

“Ya I’ll do that, will you call him to make sure he has stuff ready for us? Probably a car too since I don’t think I can fit a tent and provisions on the back of my bike,” Jason chuckled.

“Don’t you worry Master Jason, we have a motorcycle trailer I shall pack for you,” Alfred said over the coms.

Jason had forgotten that Alfred was on the coms as Agent A. “Thanks A,” Jason said and then turned off the radio again. “Does that sound good Danny? We’ll probably have to wait a bit for Alfred to pack up some food for us and stuff but getting out of Gotham overnight, being able to see the sky…?”

“Ya, ya Jason that sounds perfect. Thank you,” Danny said, squeezing Jason gently and snuggled against his back.

They pulled up outside the manor and Jason kicked down his bike stand so they could both get off. “Do you want to go in and pack some clothes or stay out here?” Jason asked as he got off and leaned against his bike still.

“I don’t want to go in,” Danny said quickly. Jason knew the feeling, where being surrounded by walls felt like a trap.

“Alright, do you mind Alfie grabbing some clothes for you then?” He asked.

“No, I don’t mind,” Danny assured. “I’m looking forward to getting away from people. I’m glad not to have to be a hero anymore honestly, but I haven’t used my ghost form in a couple weeks and I want to Fly,” He said. “Nothing clears my head like flying as fast as I can.”

“Ya I can imagine. Bruce should introduce you to some of the supers, it would be good for you to spar with someone you can go all out with,” Jason said crossing his arms, not missing the way Danny’s eyes lingered on his biceps, smirking a little at Danny’s moment of distraction.

“Ya, it would probably be good for me to get some training with my powers too. Mom taught both me and Jazz martial arts when we were kids, before things got bad, but that was a while ago and before I got my powers.” Danny said a little vaguely.

Jason nodded and was about to respond when he heard a soft motor, looking up to see Alfred driving a cart over to them, towing a small trailer towards them that no doubt had everything they needed for their camping trip. Maybe even enough from a weekend away in case Danny needed more time.

“I’m sure you have a relatively secure location in mind, Master Jason?” Alfred asked once he came to a halt.

“Ya I do, Gonna get as far away from civilization as I can within a day’s drive,” He told Alfred who gave a thin smile and nodded.

“Very good, be safe you too,” Alfred said, stepping back again.

“We will, thank you Alfred,” Danny said with a little smile, going to stand by the bike, letting Jason get on first again before sitting down behind him again and hugged him.

“Ya, don’t worry about us,” Jason assured as he put his helmet back on and kicked off, speeding back out of the manor drive before anyone else got home. They were probably dawdling to give Jason and Danny time to get out again, he appreciated it, he didn’t think Dick in particular would be able to stop himself from questioning Danny. Even though he would only have the best intentions and all that but now wasn’t the time.

It was a decently long drive to the nearest national park, where Jason went off-roading and in the back. He would make a donation later, he just didn’t want anyone to be able to track that this was where they were. Taking Danny this far away from Gotham and the other Bats was already a bit of a risk with Vlad still at large but Jason had the specter-deflector and blaster Danny gave him with them and he hadn’t told anyone where they were going, they’d be fine. He was good at off-roading and judging from the giggling from Danny he was enjoying the off-road motorbike ride.

When they were far enough away from the road no one was likely to see them there was a bright flash behind Jason and the weight of his bike shifted. He almost panicked Danny had fallen off before he caught movement to his side and glanced over to see Danny, now with white hair and green eyes, grinning at him impishly and racing along at his side flying fast.

“Race you!” Danny said, his voice had an odd echoing chime to it in this form but it was still recognizably his. There was plausible deniability about his identity though, sure as hell more than there was for superman but maybe they should still find him a mask.

“You’re on! But no just going through the trees! If I have to dodge, so do you!” Jason laughed.

“You got it!” Danny cheered.

Jason knew he was going to lose, but it was good to see Danny smiling, pinging between trees like a fucking ping-pong ball with pent up energy from not having used his powers at all for more then a week. Working out all the nerves and jitters as Jason raced along behind him trying to keep up.

Jason thought it was probably an hour of flying/driving before they came to a bank of a lake, he had to turn his bike sideways and skid to not slip into the water as Danny laughed at him.

“This seems like a good place to set up camp huh?” Danny said, his feet finally touching the ground again. Another bright flash made Jason blink and Danny was his black haired, blue eyes self again. “Do you think Alfred packed us swim suits?”

-------

They unpacked everything Alfred had sent them, set up the tent far enough back from the lake they couldn’t be seen across it, and laughed about the amount of food he’d sent them. It was enough to feed an entire team for a week! Still it was good food, and Danny was particularly excited about a chicken soup he’d sent in a metal container that could be heated up over a fire.

Once they were unpacked Jason went to grab firewood, leaving Danny alone in the camp to take his binder off and change his shirt since that one still had jelly on it from the ultrasound. By the time he came back Danny had changed into a hoodie so his chest was barely visible, only when Danny absently rubbed it. When Danny caught Jason staring he gave the other man a shy smile and darted over to steal a kiss, taking half the wood to help Jason carry it to the fire-pit.

Jason set about making a fire while Danny went back to the lake, wading in the shallows since they didn’t have their swimsuits. It was too cool out for an ordinary human to swim anyway, though Danny would probably be fine.

Jason glanced over now and then, watching Danny’s figure as he strolled along the shore, pants rolled up and ankles swishing through the green water without a sound. He piled kindling and lit it easily, stoking the fire and adding bigger logs, sitting back and waiting for some coals to develop while he set up their little camping grill. Once he could pull out some coals he did, put the grill over them and set the food on that to heat.

When the food started to smell good Danny came wandering back over and sat down cross legged next to Jason, leaning against his shoulder. “Alfred’s the best cook in the family,” Jason said as he stirred the food, the soup which was just for Danny, and a chili and rice. “But I’m a pretty damn good cook too, if I do say so myself, you should come over to my place for dinner some time. I’d like to cook for you,” He admitted, it was always a way he showed affection.

“I’d like that,” Danny said, his eyes fixed on the fire and a small smile on his lips. His presence at Jason’s side was comforting and cool. He still seemed like he was a little bit out of it, bouncing back and forth between energy and lethargy, denial and grief probably. Jason had resolved not to say anything until after food, things tended to seem less dire with a stomach full of good food.

Once the food was steaming he used his gloves to pull the grill off the fire, nudging Danny to shuffle away so he could put it down between them. With the spoons he’d used to stir still in them.

“Do you want to share?” Danny asked, trying to hide his reluctance, which was sweet.

“If you want to, but if not the soup is all yours,” Jason assured.

“Thanks. I guess I am eating for three now,” Danny chuckled a little bitterly before he grabbed the spoon and started to eat, blowing carefully on each bite so it wouldn’t be too hot.

They ate in silence, Danny quickly finished off all the soup, which would have been enough for two people but Danny ate a lot. He’d need to eat more before bed no doubt. Alfred had still packed them why too much food but maybe there was a method to his madness anyway. Jason finished most of the Chili and then pushed the rest towards Danny who gave him a sheepish smile but finished that off too.

Jason moved the grill out from between them and Danny scooted closer to Jason again. When he lifted his arm Danny ducked under it so Jason could drape his arm over Danny’s shoulders, keeping the shorter man tucked against his side. “So, do you feel up to talking now?” Jason asked softly and Danny sighed, turning his head to hide his face against Jason’s shoulder for a moment.

“Ya,” He muttered resignedly when he came out of hiding. “It’s not really the babies this time. I mean ya I was still sort of in denial about actually being pregnant and seeing it made it real so that was a lot, but I had already mostly processed it. I want the babies, we’ll set up a nursery at the manor, I’ll have support, hell Bruce would probably even hire a nanny if we need. I’ll be able to finish school, it’s just…” He trailed off for a moment.

“You know, when I was born my dad was a little disappointed, they loved me but they’d wanted a daughter and a son. When I was assigned female at birth and they didn’t want any more kids, he was a little disappointed. When I came out as trans they were So Excited. My dad kept talking about how he knew I’d taken after him! I was going to be a ‘big man’ after all. He couldn’t seem to understand that even though I was a man it hadn’t changed my biology. They were so supportive, my mom Screamed at a teacher who made me cry misgendering me, got them fired.

“They weren’t always bad parents, there were always good days. Ya they’d retreat into their lab for days at a time and we’d have to fend for ourselves, they left guns and chemicals all over the place. I Know they weren’t good parents, but they still loved us, and I loved them. And despite everything half of me really wants them to know their grandkids, wanted my mom to be there holding his hands and have my dad come bursting through the wall because he’s so excited to be a grandpa,” Danny sniffled a little.

“I’ll be a better parent then they were by miles, but it’s sort of scary to know that love isn’t always enough. People who love you… still hurt you. It’s not fair that the good parts are all tangled up in the bad parts, and the bad parts are to bad to let anywhere near me or the babies, especially with the whole, half ghost thing.”

“Ya, it’s not,” Jason sighed, biting his lip for a moment before clearing his throat. “Before Bruce took me in, before I was an orphan, my mom was an addict. Dad was in prison, it was just the two of us. On her good days she taught me to cook, she sang me lullabies, taught me Spanish.” He trailed off and sighed. “On her bad days she was too high to move, or unconscious. She’s be that way for days until the drugs ran out, I’d make sure she ate, try and keep the place clean, hell I had to help her go to the washroom. And I did it, because I was holding on to that last good day, and hoping for the next one. Even when the good days came less and less often near the end.

“Kids love their parents, even when they don’t deserve it. When the parent loves them too a kid can forgive just about any failing and dismiss all the hurt the parents cause because ‘people who love you wouldn’t hurt you’. Truth is the people who love you can often hurt you the worst, because you let them into your head, and rationalize everything they do. So if they hurt you, that must be what love feels like.”

“What do you think love feels like?” Danny asked, voice soft and vulnerable.

“Well, for me I guess I learned what love really felt like when I moved in with Bruce,” though he was loathed to admit it. “When he’d carry me up to bed even though he knew I was only pretending to be asleep, he’d go slow so he could hold me a bit longer because he knew that’s what I really wanted. When he stayed home from patrol with me because I was sick and I wanted comfort, or remembered where my favourite gargoyle was so he could come find me when I was upset. And Alfred, teaching me to cook his family recipes and making me tea when I woke up in the middle of the night with nightmares, never seeming put out he was losing sleep.

“Love is… warm, and forgiving, willing to give you what you need without resenting it. Of course Bruce wasn’t perfect, stubborn, moralistic, self important bastard.” Danny let out an amused snort as Jason continued. “But… I know he did his best, and he never abandoned me. Even when I was dying I knew he was on his way, it sucked that he didn’t get there in time, but I never believed he abandoned me because I knew he never would.”

“I guess that’s Jazz for me. She’s only two years older than me, but she was always there, she showed me how to do just about everything. I thought it was annoying that she was always after me about doing my homework and stuff, but it means she really cared. Not just when she remembered to, or didn’t have anything better to do.

“I guess I’m a little scared of that too. Now that I have a safe home, and she’s 18, she’s going to go to university and make new friends. She knows I’m safe now, so what if she doesn’t… care as much anymore?” Danny asked.

“That’s not going to happen,” Jason said immediately. “She might be around a bit less, but she won’t care any less. That’s what siblings are like. I should know, I have enough of them,” he joked and Danny gave a wet laugh.

“Ya, she deserves to have her own life anyway,” Danny said, but he seemed calmer. They sat in a comfortable silence, watching the sunset across the lake, it was beautiful.

“Sooo, how do you think you want to decorate the nursery?” Jason asked and saw Danny smile.

“I’ll tell you in a minute, now that it’s dark there’s one more thing I have to do to feel better,” He said sardonically, ducking out from under Jason’s arm and standing. “Cover your ears,” he directed as he walked over to the lake.

Jason was confused, but he did as Danny asked as the other transformed into his ghost form. At the edge of the lake he took a deep breath and Wailed, the water exploded up around him forced back by the sound. Jason clamped his hands over his ears more firmly as the sound ricocheted around his skull, it was such a pure rage, fear, and sorrow he could Feel it bubbling in him as well, like it was more feeling than sound. Jason didn’t know how long it was before Danny stopped, collapsing to his knees and changing back into human form, breathing hard.

Hesitantly Jason uncovered his ears and after a moment Danny took a deep breath and came back over to him, collapsing next to him by the fire. “Okay for the nursery I was thinking of a celestial theme.”

They talked for a long time about what Danny wanted for the nursery at the manor. When Jason worked up the courage to suggest if they were still going strong in a few months they should set up a second nursery in his apartment. So Danny could come visit with the babies more easily once they were born, they moved on to plans for that hypothetical. They decided on a forest theme for that one, Jason was looking forward to it. He loved kids, and ya he and Danny were new but he had a really good feeling about this.

#dc x dp #danny phantom #jason todd #batman #alfred pennyworth #bruce wayne #trans!Danny #danny is pregnant #tw dysphoria #discussion of parental neglect #tw neglect #character study #dead on main #fanfiction

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