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seraphinitegames · 3 years ago

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Nat meets Solas...

So, I was chatting with some Wayhaven people lately, and we were talking about how Dragon Age isn't going to be at EA Play and is probably still a very long time away.

Obviously, we all said we want DA4 to be the best it can be, so we'd prefer they take longer and make it fantastic without the awful crunch that game company's can put their employees under...but maybe just a crumb of info, Bioware...please...we're begging you...lol!

But I thought it might be a good time to share a scenario I wrote for one of my Patreons, who is always amazingly lovely and allowed me to share this!

I was hoping it might help boost us a little during the wait! So here's a scenario I wrote of Nat meeting Solas.

The eluvian swirls with vivid energy which tickles against Solas’ skin as he steps through it. On the other side is not a place he was expecting.

It’s a living room, but filled with rich furniture, warm woods…and a tall woman staring at him over the top of a patterned china teacup.

“Hello,” he says, confused at his location but not wishing to aggravate the stranger.

She places her cup down on the side table next to her plush armchair and smiles. “Hello.”

He takes the final step through the mirror, and it solidifies to silver glass behind him. “This was not where I expected to be.”

She laughs softly, a deep, melodic sound that suits the opulent environment. “I guessed as much. I didn’t realise the mirror was a gateway. Though I have had dealings with those who use reflections that way.”

“It is not the reflection which we travel through,” he begins, then tightens his lips closed before looking to her with a soft smile. “How did you acquire it?”

She folds her hands into her lap. “We get many things in our line of work.”

“And may I ask what line of work that is?” he ventures.

A hint of a smile traces over her long lips. “You can ask.”

He chuckles. “May I enter?” It seems a pointless question when he’s already in the room, but he spreads a hand out in question before stepping forward.

“Please do,” she says, nodding at the long leather sofa opposite her.

Solas proceeds, running his long fingers against the soft material and wondering at the craftsmanship. It’s unlike anything he’s seen before.

He takes a seat and lounges back, crossing his legs and watching as she mirrors the motion.

“I suppose I should ask what you’re doing here.” Her voice is gentle, almost verging on curious, but she manages to keep her questioning look behind a smile. Mostly.

“I felt one of the eluvians activate and was keen to see where it would lead.” Solas glances at the woman’s cup and saucer. “I did not mean to interrupt your tea.”

“Would you like some?” she offers.

He wrinkles his nose and holds up a hand. “I’m fine, thank you.”

A silence falls between them. Solas subtly inspects the woman’s tall stature as she reclines quite casually in the chair, even with his intrusive presence, and a confident inquisitiveness draws her slightly closer to him.

As he makes judgement of her, he allows her to do the same to him.

Satisfied they mean no harm to the other, they both relax into their seats.

“You live here alone?” Solas asks, glancing about the large room which obviously is part of an even larger abode.

“I have back-up if I need it,” she replies.

He nods, impressed. “You spoke of the eluvian being part of your work. You often trade in magical items?”

“We don’t trade,” she retorts with a firm frown. “It was put into our safe keeping.”

“By whom?”

She arches a brow. “By someone I very much doubt would appreciate me giving away their details.”

He lounges further back against the comfort of the sofa with a growing smile. “You have no need to be evasive.”

“You’re a stranger.”

He gives a half shrug and a nod of understanding. “The eluvians should be under my control. I do not care to find one…so unattended.”

“You claim to own these objects?” she asks.

“Not the object itself, but what lies within,” he replies in as coy a response as she has seen to give. “It’s a necessary thing.”

She arches forward in her chair. “For what purpose?”

He dips his head. “For reclaiming a lost people.”

“Your people?” Her gaze flickers to the points of his ears as she asks the question.

“I hope they will be,” he replies, a strength to the words that has kept him focused all these years, but a tiny crack hitches in his voice.

She is quick enough to spot it. “You doubt your resolve?”

His brows squeeze together as tight as his chest does.

She lets out a breathy laugh and falls back against her chair. “Someone makes you doubt your resolve.”

He flicks his gaze up to study hers.

She nods. “Oh yes. Definitely a someone.”

“How can you be so certain?” he asks, spreading an arm out along the back of the seat. He wishes he had the strength to hide his heart. He thought time would be enough. It was not.

She flicks a hand up. “I’m the same. Though they don’t make me doubt my resolve, they only strengthen it.” She quickly takes the measure of him before she sips at her tea. “Make sure you’re willing to give up the heart of the person who makes you feel this way. If they make you doubt what you’re doing, then maybe it’s not the path you should be on.”

An uneasiness flitters like moths inside of him, so he dampens the light the love in his heart feeds them. His doubts quieten once again.

“As much as I appreciate the conversation,” he begins, standing from his place and moving a little slower as she tenses, “I should be on my way.”

“It was good to meet you…” She waits.

He places a hand to his armoured chest. “Solas.”

“Natalie,” she returns.

“If we should meet again, I would welcome it, Natalie.”

He sweeps around the sofa and arcs his hands up to spark the eluvian into life.

As he steps through, he hears the parting words “Good luck”, and the portal closes behind him.

Hope you're all doing well, and staying cool and hydrated if you're suffering with heat! <3

#the wayhaven chronicles #dragon age #nat sewell #solas #scenario

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thedinanshiral · 4 years ago

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My personal DA4 wishlist + thoughts

I’ve been teasing this post for a couple of weeks over at Twitter, i’m the worst! But anyway, since game journalism has decided to confirm, once again, that the next Dragon Age game will be set in Tevinter like that’s breaking news, now’s as good a time as ever to write all this down.

Locations: Tevinter, clearly. It’s been pretty much a given since the end of Trespasser in 2015, with that scene where the Inquisitor stabs a map on a table directly on Tevinter as they promise to go after Solas to stop him. But also concept art and several stories from Tevinter Nights heavily imply Antiva, Nevarra, the Anderfells, and maybe Rivain. For those of you who don’t know your Thedosian Geography 101, that’s basically Northern Thedas. And it makes sense, since so far for three games straight we’ve been first stuck in Ferelden, then the coast of the Free Marches, and later the rest of Southern Thedas. We’ve never been North, only heard of it. So in DA4 i’m sure we will finally be able to visit.

Characters: If we’re going to Tevinter, we must meet Dorian again, maybe meet Maevaris Tilani as well (previously only seen in comics), judging from the latest comics series, i’m hoping for Fenris too. And going by the latest teaser trailer, we might see Varric again. As for characters that so far we have no news of, i’d like to see Cole, the Iron Bull, and if by any chance BioWare feels like blessing us with a Hawke/Fenris reunion i might just die happy. I’d also very much like to see the Inquisitor, but more on that later.

Companions: considering concept art and the latest teaser trailer, plus Tevinter Nights stories and new characters, we have an interesting repertoire of new potential companions. A Tevinter mage, an ancient elf (like a temple guardian) or a dalish elf (like Strife), a Nevarran mortalitasi or spirit, Antivan Crows, Lords of Fortune (new faction, kind of like treasure hunters), Qunari lady, maybe an alchemist or shapeshifter, Grey Wardens (possibly a dwarf), a liberated or escaped slave, a Siccari (Tevinter spies/assassins)..even past agents of the Inquisition could return.

Plot: We know Solas wants to take down the Veil. We know there’s two archdemons left, and Grey Wardens are regaining some spotlight in concept art lately. We might have to fight on multiple fronts simultaneously and be strategic about it. Solas might even unleash a double Blight just to keep us distracted while he focus on his own goal, who knows. But many other things are happenig in the margins and all over the place. The Qunari Antaam is having a crisis with some of its members supposedly going rogue, the order they’re so proud of is breaking up, and the whole of Northern Thedas is facing an imminent threat of invasion. Tevinter is still dealing with remnants of the Venatori and might soon be dealing with a slaves rebellion and/or a political and social reform (Magisters Dorian and Maeveris have been working wirh the Lucerni, a group aiming to restore and redeem Tevinter). The Antivan Crows -the de facto rulers of Antiva - may be dealing with a succession crisis, as their First Talon, a powerful feared and respected but old lady, might not be around for much longer and seems her chosen heir has died before his time. Meanwhile in the Anderfells nobody’s heard anything from the Grey Wardens’ HQ at Weisshaupt since the end of Inquisition, and as told in the novel Last Flight, the sudden reappearance of griffons may have had something to do with that radio silence. So you see, get ready for another +100 hours long game because BW has plenty of stuff to keep us busy with. But in short, DA4 seems will be about primarily searching, finding, and dealing with Solas. Regardless of what you decided at the Exalted Council in Trespasser, the Inquisition or what’s left of it is most likely the group orchestrating that mission. As it was so clearly stated then, they need new people Solas doesn’t know so he can’t foresee their actions, so it’s possible the DA4 protagonist is a new agent or a third party hired to do what the Inner circle can’t due to their familiarity with Solas in the past. But at the same time -and this is assuming we get to find Solas in this game - i definitely think the Inquisitor could easily show up again. No, losing an arm doens’t mean they’ve retired forever, prosthetics do exist in Thedas, a world where you can combine dwarven craftmanship with enchantments, seriously, i don’t ever want to hear “but they lost an arm” ever again as an excuse to write them out. And no, marrying Cullen or joining the Red Jennys is no impediment to join the “Stop Solas” Squad; the end of Trespasser means something, mainly that this is personal. Be it they loved them as lovers, as friends or ended up hating his guts for using and betraying them, the Inquisitor’s relationship with Solas makes this very personal, and so having any other character do that face off would cheapen all of it, all that bittersweet angsty development and expectations of either revenge or closure. That moment should happen between those two. It adds a ton of motivation due to their past historyas well, something a new protagonist would lack entirely. My personal best hope is for a sort of dual protagonist thing, say we play new protagonist for most of the game but a selected missions or scenes where we play as the Inquisitor once again and take over for key and heart-wrenching dialogue options. My second best hope is for the Inquisitor to show up as playable for the moment we catch up with Solas. My third and final best hope is for the inquisitor to be a sort of advisor but more like new protagonist’s boss/employer to whom they report back to and get new missions from. The Inquisitor can be stuck in meetings for the most part of it, i just want to know they’re there, behind a door, super busy but there. A cameo like Hawke’s in Inquisition is the bare miminum i can take, anyhting less than that like a mention in a sidequest description or a footnote in a codex entry would be a total injustice.

Romances: I’m open for pretty much anything, as any good BW fan would be. But i’d like romances to feel more alive in the sense that they don’t abruptly get stuck once you exhaust all related quests and dialogue options. As much as my Adaar liked that spank from the Iron Bull, that it was the only thing they could share after their romance was locked was a bit..meh. I liked Dorian’s tho, because his gave one the option to talk a bit, go for a walk, gossip, and sure, it all happened off-screen, and there were limited possibilities, but it was nice and made their relationship feel a bit more real, like they had more to it than kissing and stuff. It happens in most games, once you secure a romanceable companion suddenly you run out of things to do and share with them, and you get stuck with the same 3 lines of dialogue over and over again. There should be a way of solving that.

Side quests: i’m ok with fetch quests initially as it is a good way of forcing the player to go out and explore huge maps, but i’d also like the fetching to have some meaning other than checking things off a list. I want to explore many ruins, and -can’t believe i’m actually saying this- i want a Fade quest. Wait! I know what you’re thinking but don’t kill me just yet, here’s my idea: what if we could visit the Fade at certain locations to witness memories or meet with spirits and recollect information on Solas, his past, his present? Both to understand him better (keep in mind we’ll most likely get a new protagonist who isn’t familiar with him like we are as players) and try to locate him or predict his next move. It would be i think i great way of having visions of Arlathan in its golden age, maybe seeing some of the other Evanuris, how they interacted with each other and with the elves in their service, what really happened ...i just want that sweet, sweet lore, i need it.

Technical stuff: ok, graphics will be amazing for sure, but i also would really really like: better, more varied and longer hairstyles, PLEASE. Body sliders, it’s damn time we get them. Mounts that actually make a difference! Let staves blades make damage in combat, I’M BEGGING HERE. Combined classes, MAGICAL ROGUES! A homebase we can fix up/build on/redecorate as fully as possible (Skyhold was great and i love it to pieces but why were those walls NEVER repaired????) . More casual outfit options, idk i love to dress up my characters, maybe some transmog? A day/night cycle and please i would love to see Thedas’ second moon, also weather variations depending on the region. Yes, i’m ambitious.

Gameplay: i’d like more AI options for companions, but not quite like in DAO, that was too much and i rarely used it. I’m curious how they’ll do combat this time but i know for sure i don’t want the kind of combat that has me going almost frame by frame pausing at every second, it’s annoying for me. I want large areas like in DAI but with a bit more stuff to see and do although one of my favourite maps is the Hissing Wastes so i won’t complain if we get a literal desert but i’d also like it to have secrets hidden around, make me work to find and solve them, i love exploring, i jump and click on EVERYTHING like i’m still a kid playing Monkey Island. A companion in concept art seems to be holding what looks like some form of rifle, so i’m curious how they’d incorporate that in the game. I know Tevinter has the magics and dwarves have the skill, a firearm is totally within the possibilities in-game without breaking any lore; also super curious what sort of skill trees Crows or Lords of Fortune could have, are they rogues, or warriors, or both??

So far, that’s what i got in my head.Well, most of it anyways, i may have missed something but this post has to end somewhere lol

What’s in your head? Feel free to share! Have you been thinking on how you’ll create your next protagonist? All i can think of is magical rogues and that glowing bow was all the hype i needed.

#Dragon Age #Dragon Age 4 #Tevinter #da4 wishlist #DA4

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felassanis · 4 years ago

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Characters that I think will make a return in Dragon Age 4

Okay, So lets get the first two out of the way and the reasons why I think they are bound to return.

Dorian Pavus: Pretty much a given, he’s already in Tevinter. He’s got big plans for the city and he’s a fan favourite. it would be a crime if he didnt come back.

Fenris: Will the Blue Wraith release I can’t help but wonder if that’s setting up Fenris’s arc and how it’ll pertain to DA4. How this wonderful character will tie into the shitstorm that’s about to occur in the next installment. When you hear Tevinter, chances are a couple of things will come to mind. Mages, blood-magic, Dorian, Slavery and Fenris. His whole character is linked to this setting. Hes a character who's got the biggest reasons to be there so he better be there. either as the leader of a slave rebellion or possibly an agent of Fen’harel. Also, given how vocal the fandom has been about him coming back, I think Bioware will deliver. I just hope he’s intertwined witht the plot like Varric was, and not given a crappy cameo like Zevran was in dragon age 2. And even if you did (You fucking monster) Give him back to Danarius, then he’ll be in Tevinter too. Or if you killed him like a fucking moron, well Bioware have brought back characters from the dead before. Leliana I'm looking at you

And ngl, I really want a FenHawke moment

Now, these next ones are the “Realistic” few who I think will make a return based on theories and evidence but I’m also making a section of characters who I want to see come back even if it’s not likely:

Sten: I find it very likely we will see this guy again. There conflict between Tevinter and Seheron should be one of the focuses in dragon age 4 and given that our actions in dragon age 2 he becomes the Arishok and if memory serves; he’s in Seheron. More Sten? More likely than you think if I’m right.

Talis: Another one who should make an appearance given her allegiance to the Qunari. Talis was a really good character and criminally underused in Mark of the Assasins and dragon age 2 as a whole. I think she’ll make a cameo, doing her thing as a skilled assassin for the Qunari.

Krem: It would be interesting for this character to make a return, perhaps he could not stand to see what is happening in his home country and makes a return. Given how important Krem is for representation, him being from Tevinter and how popular he was, I think he will also be making a return.

Verania: A small cameo. But I think if you stopped Fenris from killing her, then his sister Verania will be making a return. Which could offer an interesting scene if Fenris also makes a return. She does return to Tevinter, and given that her master was killed (Hopefully) it would be a curious thing to see how she ended up.

Varric: The reason why I think Varric will come back is because of the Red Idol. Varric has history with that thing, it was him and his brother who made the expedition to recover it from the Deep Roads and given how obvious it is that the Red Idol will play a major role in DA4 I think Varric will feel compelled to try and get it back or destroy it. He hates red lyrium and he hates that idol and he knows exactly what it is capable of, so the thought of it ending up in the wrong hands must unsettle him. He felt at fault for the red lyrium and Corypheus, hence why he stayed with the Inquisition to try and sort it all out. I think it will be the same for the red idol, he feels a responsibility to stop it because he thinks it’s his fault it’s out there in the first place.

Scout Harding: A potential LI maybe??? I think she’ll play a vital role whether or not the inquisition was kept or discarded in Tresspasser. I hope she gets a more important role than a simple quest giver.

Isabela: With the recent concept art I am seeing A LOT of Pirates and I couldn’t help but think of Isabela. And that one concept art seems to confirm Isabela is coming back and I'm so excited.

Leliana & Cassandra: It sounds to me like Leliana and Cassandra will come back as advisors of sorts, I’m not sure what role they’ll play exactly in the grand scheme of things in the next game but I do think they will both come back in some capacity, because of their words and cameo in the ending to Tresspasser.

Abelas: maybe only a cameo if you killed him, but Solas essentially recruits Abelas and if hes alive I think Abelas could make a return.

Unrealistically, but why I think they should:

Zevran: He’s has somehow been mentioned or appeared in every game since origins and I don’t want that streak to be ruined. I think there’s definitely a role for him given how much he adventures and explores, his wit and his tendencies to get into trouble, and how he is a fan favourite.

Oghren: Honestly? Just because we haven’t heard from him a long time.

Cullen: I highly doubt he will come back. Why? Because I feel like the option to romance him in Inquisition on top of his sort of redemption arc in that game is his...end. Like, he got closure, he got the focus he needed regarding all the shit he went through in the past two games and I honestly do believe that is where Cullen’s story ends. But...I could be wrong, they might want to keep the pattern of him appearing in every game and maybe they have something else planned for him since they strangely liked this character because he went from this minor dude in Origins to Meredith’s lackey in dragon age 2 to a fully fledged main cast member in dragon age 3.

Meredith: Speaking of Meredith, I think it would be so neat for her to make a return as a boss fight. Because fighting her in dragon age 2 was so much fun and I think with the return of the Red Lyrium Idol, having her come back somehow would be appropriate. Maybe the statue she turns into merely keeps her in hibernation? So under whatever the hell material the red lyrium used to ‘kill’ her, it actually didn’t snuff out her life but rather preserved it. She’s still alive and fiddling with the Idol brings her back. Edit: turns out shes super dead but I'm leaving it here in case I can somehow rationalise how this scary lady could come back

Orsino: I can totally imagine the theory that Varric lied about Orsino’s death in order to protect him so Cassandra and the Templars wouldn’t go after him. Even the devs said his death was a mistake, so this could be a great way to rectify how shitty a card he was dealt in DA2 and give him a better storyline and role in the next game. Orsino is just a really good character who would do well with more time and focus spent on him.

Bodahn & Sandal: because I need answers about what the fuck Sandal is and I miss Bodahn. And given Sandal's massive fucking foreshadowing to Solas and the magic of the elves I think HE HAS TO COME BACK but also...idk what they would really do with him, if hed really play a role other than what he did in the first and second game. An enigmatic dwarf for comedic effect and also creepiness.

Anders: if hes alive, and if you didnt romance him. I want a cameo, since he was originally supposed to appear in Inquisition as a hermit in a cave. I'd like that concept to return in the area near Tevinter/Antiva. Because I think it would be tragic, if hes borderline insane and a wandering nomad hiding his identity. Maybe Justice has taken over, maybe we have to free him of Justice to recruit Anders. Maybe we need him to enter the Fade somehow? Maybe when the veil is broken Justice takes over completely that way? I just want an Anders cameo, see a tragic ending to a tragic character with the potential of redemption? Potential chance at happiness through helping the player fight Solas? And maybe, if Isabela or Varric come back...theyd have something to say? They might beg the player to help him? Mourn their friend or fret over him? Varric and Anders hug?

Spirit of Wynne: my girl Wynee gets no fucking love or mention from what I've seen and I will not stand for it. I'm sure she died, even by DAII's timeline. But if the veil is torn? Maybe her spirit will pay us a visit, give us words of encourage or wise lessons??? I miss Wynne so much.

Morrigan: I do think something is being set up with her character and Kieran. And with her being so woven with the whole Mythal thing, I wouldn't be shocked if Morrigan wanted to get involved, since Mythal wanted to live on through Morrigan. Maybe Morrigan has a bone to pick, maybe shes mad that Solas killed her mother.

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crqstalite · 5 years ago

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so @spindlewit inspired me to pick up this trainwreck of me playing star wars again about a lana conspiracy i started a LONG time ago that i’m just now revising after they provided their own opinion on this. thank you for diverting my afternoon XD

i took it seriously, sorry.

source: https://spindlewit.tumblr.com/post/612223381785460736/oooh-whats-this-about-a-lana-conspiracy

spoilers below

my first major question: is why she can’t be killed?

lana is the only character from an expansion that can not be killed at any point in the story up to 6.1. possibly because for ds!outlanders/commanders she would be the only advisor left and logically she would have no replacement(, but why not leave theron with the commander instead, or even let the commander run things themselves?). the four characters that can be killed are:

-arcann (on zakuul, chapter six: the dragon’s maw)

-senya (on voss, chapter one: wrath and ruin)

-koth (on the gravestone, chapter three: dark reunions)

-theron (on nathema, the nathema conspiracy flashpoint)

this may be on bioware for this, but all four characters a) get replaced or b) aren’t important enough to be replaced. and, because they can be killed, bioware may not know what to do with them, because inevitably some people will feel cheated in not getting extra story just because they didn’t like a character and killed them off. i know some people have actual emotional issues with the reasoning for why they couldn’t deal with a certain character (usually arcann), so i can understand bioware’s reasoning. but for those of us who do like the characters, it’s easy to feel deprived of more content because of this reasoning. while good to cater to one side of the fandom, alienating the other doesn’t help the issue.

arcann, for example, never did much after knights of the eternal throne ended. as big a character as he was in those two expansions, you still only get one conversation with him (a personal alliance alert for everyone), and possibly a side flirt before nathema conspiracy. after that, you hear nothing from the scarred prince. absolutely nothing. so he falls under b, and because bioware didn’t focus on him, he didn’t need a replacement because he didn’t have any pull in the story.

senya, much like her son, also didn’t. she doesn’t have a story after knights of the eternal throne either. as one of my favorite characters, i don’t have an inkling of why, there’s plenty of plot in her to be used too. she falls under b as well, she didn’t need a replacement.

koth did get a replacement...kind of. if you kill him, or if he leaves on his own volition, hylo replaces him as the pilot of the gravestone. which is cool because as an ls!outlander/commander, you don’t get the option to have her quips and snips. he wasn’t my favorite character because of his need to have zakuul be at the forefront of everything he does, but after finishing khaak (ds!outlander who did kill him), i realized that you didn’t miss him, as morally dark or light that you were. you didn’t lose the gravestone, hylo just took over. there weren’t any stakes to killing him. it was literally just a moral question, and really didn’t need to have ds/ls consequences.

theron. oh stars theron.

theron doesn’t get replaced. and in a way, he needed to. there isn’t much you miss in the subsequent expansions without him by your side, gnost-dural doesn’t even mention him even though he’s oddly absent. in fact, no one does. not even lana. possibly as a plot point that everyone’s too scared of you to say anything about it, or even that the outlander + lana lied about where he was (an interesting plot point that i may write about in a while) after his death. most likely because most people who like theron kept him alive anyways, and anyone who killed him didn’t like him anwyay. the same way they did koth.

a bit of a tangent, but bioware has a nasty habit of shoving characters aside for new ones. the vanilla companions being the very first victims of this. after the vanilla story, you get voice lines, but no conversations with them until you meet them again after knights. because bioware introduces lana and theron instead as the new main characters. cytharat, katha niar and lemda avesta are also victims of this in a way, as they were quickly forgotten after the makeb arc. in jedi under siege, tau idair, arn pelarun and major anri are the characters that quickly take over during the expansion. lana and theron rarely appear if at all during this story. i understand that you were either undercover or working for a faction they might not agree with, but wouldn’t it be more suspicious if the esteemed commander didn’t have her right hand man/woman beside them during the mission?

but theron, in my opinion, desperately needed to be replaced after his death. it left lana as the only advisor to the commander. this makes her often the sole bringer of bad news, and she has most of your information you’ll ever have because of this. that’s just odd to begin with, as more often than not lana is just infodumping exposition when it should be shared with theron or some one else. and some empty spots that they try to fill during jedi under siege and onward where theron is supposed to be. there’s even a scene at the end of onslaught that if you romance lana and kiss her at the end, you hear and offhanded cough and the camera even pans to where he should be. (i assume). coding issues and whatnot aside, it brings us full circle.

why can’t lana be killed?

it sounds very dark, i know. but everyone else can be, and our darling lana has plot armor the entire six expansions to 6.1. the uprisings that spindlewit mentioned, i’ve never done. that is extremely interesting, and i’d like to definitely run a couple when i can. here’s also this from their post:

“based on what Jonas Balkar tells a trooper upon his return, Lana fielded his attempts to contact you. from what else have we been isolated?”

i have yet to run a trooper past disavowed, so i wouldn’t know but that is very odd. it’s plausible that lana hasn’t only done this to balkar, but to others as well. who’s to say that lana has conviently put a blindfold over your eyes? what else has she skillfully covered up? skirmishes between the republic and empire during the fight against zakuul? pleads from either faction that she simply didn’t want the commander distracted by? she’s the one who found out about iokath and told you first anyway, and as spindlewit says:

“her omnipresence in the story and plot-protection. she’s always on/by your side and can’t be killed, is your primary source of all information.”

possibly, this is because iokath got so out of hand that she finally had to call it in. who’s to say that imperial and republic forces in the alliance haven’t been rats and haven’t been feeding malcom/acina facts about the new alliance and their territory on iokath to make the invasion easier? by this time, the eternal alliance (by swtor’s “official” timeline [courtesy of torcommunity.com]) is only three years old up until iokath. still extremely vulnerable, and haven’t picked a side yet or a fight with either faction. other than the eternal fleet, they’re just another upstart group and haven’t gained much traction up until that point. yes, they brought the eternal throne down, but they’re still recovering from that fight as well. morals or intentions or otherwise, malcom and acina would need whatever allies and supplies they could get to take out the other. taking iokath would be one of their very first steps. it’s mentioned even in-game that supplies across the galaxy are dwindling, so it isn’t just us that’s suffering from this either.

theron was a rat, yes, but who’s to say he’s the first one? we only know that iokath was just being invaded at about the same time by both factions, who’s to say that the republic and empire hadn’t already had small task forces on iokath before we’d been alerted, and theron’s scheme had only added to the problem? acina and malcom, depending upon who you side with, seem to know exactly what they’re looking for when they hit iokath. this could be after weeks of scouting, or this could be because of their spies on the inside of the alliance.

time is also shit in swtor. until others or star wars themselves tries to plot out the timeline, you’ll notice that it’s anybody’s guess how long it’s been between certain events. i personally believe it’s been maybe a week since the republic and empire touched down on iokath to when we make our decision/end up at their base.

there’s nothing we learn later that can prove otherwise. and there isn’t anything to prove that lana hadn’t already found out about this and hid it accordingly. it’s also possible that shit finally hit the fan, and to keep from looking like a failure of keeping iokath strictly neutral, she’d have to fabricate a story to keep her in the limelight of the commander’s eye.

we only get one cutscene before war on iokath, and it sounds like we haven’t personally been to iokath for a very long time. lana may have information she’s been withholding, and without anyone else on iokath, she could very easily have many secrets that no one would know about.

because in all, lana needs to stay at the right hand of the commander.

if you haven’t already noticed, lana, unlike theron, often isn’t phased by the things you do. quinn and elara remain somewhat bad examples, but theron had a very emotional reaction to the death of his father. whether because it is family or not, lana doesn’t blink an eye at all no matter who dies on iokath. even if acina dies, she isn’t any more or any less disallusioned than she was before. on an imperial saboteur? you can kill every darth possible and she will still support you anyway. hell, senya, koth and theron can die. all people she recruited to your alliance and had ties to in the past. watching them die, even fighting senya, not even begging the commander not to leave theron, had some emotional toll we aren’t seeing. because she’s pragmatic.

pragmatic: adjective

dealing with things sensibly and realistically in a way that is based on practical rather than theoretical considerations."a pragmatic approach to politics"

that’s how she’s always described, isn’t she? a pragmatic sith lord who doesn’t care for titles or achieving a better or newer status among her peers.

or she’s willing to do whatever necessary to remain in power. defecting from the empire entirely, allying with the republic. making the hard decisions, allowing what she had to fall apart so the commander could rise, along with her. her position has never been threatened before, so of course she wouldn’t need to rise in power. she doesn’t want to lead, she doesn’t need to lead. she just needs to be close to the top.

because if she did continue to remain in power, that’d mean she had all the confidential and redacted knowledge in the galaxy, if not more. when the commander’s back was turned, she would have information they never would. she even advises us to watch everyone after iokath, and the commander would never even know about the ability to do this before, emperor/ess or otherwise. and you receive some pretty in detail things about both theron and lana. nothing that would raise too much suspicion. i don’t have those emails on hand, but its still rather concerning. and since lana was the one who wished to procure these examinations, who’s to say she didn’t edit her own from what the program sent in?

think, the worst callout post in the galaxy is at the fingertips of lana beniko.

so why doesn’t lana have her own betrayal arc?

well, that’s just it.

she should...but she doesn’t. a) bioware knows that most people don’t have a problem with lana, in fact most do like her character. with koth, people didn’t like his character. senya + arcann, some people had issues with arcann and in turn his mother. theron? some people just had problems with theron from the beginning. it wouldn’t serve a purpose to have the ability to kill her. b) she doesn’t have any reasoning to...yet.

lana isn’t as covert as theron. she doesn’t have a past in sis, or imperial intelligence. but she’s a very quick learner and her patchwork of knowledge has become an entire blanket. hell there’s even a throwaway line in shadow of revan where theron and lana banter back and forth. she very clearly picks up things very quickly, claiming to slice through four layers of encryption to shut the jammer down.

theron’s right to say, “i’ve created a monster”. he’s partially the reason she’s able to slice so well anyways.

yes, she was minister for a period of time. she saw the effect of theron’s treason, how unplanned it was and just about how well it went for him (spoiler: it didn’t go well). she would know that to attempt the same thing, she’d have to bide her time until she was in a position to do so without minimal knockback. before she can betray anyone, she needs to know what will hit hardest. that means not breaking the commander’s trust and being the person that we can lean on. someone we’d never question because they were always there for us. even the wookiepedia says this:

“Lana Beniko had a very unusual personality for a Sith Lord. She spoke in a very serene and considerate manner, and possessed a keen mind with a preference for analyzing a problem rather than charging in head on.”

lana beniko could destroy the alliance from the inside out. if she really wanted. yes, a romanced theron could as well, but he didn’t want power either. he never needed it, and was even willing to accept he might not be accepted back into the alliance after what he did. but a romanced lana would be even worse, knowing even more about how to tear down the commander, and make it hurt. she would analyze us just as a computer would, storing every tic, every outburst, every decision to use against us.

but she doesn’t want to. logically, she doesn’t have a reason to. koth did, he wanted justice for zakuul and a ds!outlander didn’t provide that. theron sort of did after his father died, and to keep the order of zildrog off our backs. lana has no responsibilities anywhere. no one is clambering for her to come back to empire either (as far as we’re concerned), so she’s happily at the top of the food chain with no prior relationships to her faction. there’s no agenda for her to serve. to say it safely, while a betrayal arc would be cool, the motivation for her to do so just isn’t there yet. it’d make just as much sense as theron’s, and it would be even more of a let-down.

at the same time, i can’t label a time lana ever asked for help in game. no one really does, but it’s very clear lana thinks she can handle everything. and in a way, she does. even moreso than theron, though possibly in other areas than him. after jedi under siege/onslaught without theron to help her with day to day or even the bigger issues, she could very quickly become overwhelmed, just as she did on ziost. she could have a plan to betray the commander if the commander does set their sights on killing her or lost trust in her, a copout if you will. if the commander were to turn on her for any reason, she’d have blackmail against them. a way out to yet again prove that she was in the right. with the support of the alliance (that she built), she could become commander herself or more likely find the next one among a pool of canindates, continuing to puppeteer it all. even if the alliance didn’t want a new commander, there would still be a major fallout with the commander either gone from the picture entirely or the alliance decaying from the inside due to trust issues.

because lana beniko is pragmatic. lana beniko will always survive, no matter what it takes. and rising from the ashes of the fire that she set, isn’t above her.

this took me an entire afternoon and there’s still stuff i want to talk about. especially how a betrayal arc would look with theron by your side instead of lana.

she could also just be a good character without any bad intentions, but that would be really boring, wouldn’t it? ;)

#swtor #star wars the old republic #star wars #theron shan #lana beniko #betrayal

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senseandaccountability · 5 years ago

Text

Fic: I have outlived the night

The prompt from @heyitsharding was “Somewhere in that library of the past”, a quote from Borges. And preferably Loghain. Title borrowed from another poem by Borges. Angst and characters and a couple of quotes from The Stolen Throne borrowed from Bioware. Ages are… estimations, I guess. Don’t come at me with numbers. And I think we’ve established by now that I emphatically do not write drabbles. If you can’t stand to read fic on tumblr, it’s also here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23971537

History is a broken circle:

He’s a child, then a young man, and they hide from the usurpers on the throne.

Safely tucked in between the lush trees, Loghain’s father teaches him to fight and parry, to ride and hunt. They’re outlaws but they’re not outlaws; he explains the distinction thoroughly, tirelessly.

“You do right by the people who depend on you,” he says. “There is no excuse for a man who doesn’t.” —

He’s sixty-five and hides in a deserted hovel in a town marked by the Blight and even more so by a ruler’s mistakes and betrayal of his own people.

The irony is not lost on him.

He’s nineteen, twenty, twenty-one and love burns in his chest; Rowan doesn’t want it and he has no use for it so he doesn’t understand why it doesn’t go away. It seems entirely unreasonable for his body to betray him in this fashion.

And then, suddenly, she’s in his arms and he _melts _into her in a way that is anything but dignified but he cannot find it in himself to care. Her hair is a fire around them and his hands gentler than he has ever willed them to be before; when she kisses him, finally, it tastes of salt and iron. It’s broken, whatever it is that they have; it’s more than enough.

Between the desperate charges and daring strategies he feels in every duel, every narrowly won victory, that one of them will die young.

He always assumes it will be him. —

“She asked for you.” Maric’s voice is ice inside the summer warm castle. It cuts through the room that separates them. “On her deathbed. I told her you were right beside her. She… lost her eyesight towards the end.”

His voice breaks something beneath Loghain’s breastbone. He curls his hands into fists where he stands by the window in this castle of ghosts. Rowan, bold and commanding, forever a breach between them and he knew it would be this way, knew it would never cease to be this way despite Gwaren and Celia and the endless string of days and duties that has followed. Rowan, lionhearted and daring, moves around them and he wonders how many times he must lose her.

“I’m-” he says but this grief that does not belong to him is beyond words.

There’s a faint sound of Cailan and Anora playing in the garden, their child-hearts sturdier, lighter. Or perhaps they simply scar in more subtle ways.

“Come,” Maric says eventually. “I’ll show you where she rests.” —

Celia dies slowly, a pain stretched out so thin over months and months that it hollows her out.

He’s not there for all of it, useless in the face of a battle that is not his to fight.

He’s not there for most of it, cannot bear the thought of her capable body and ferocious will being tempered by sickness, her loved features marked by fate; for as long as he lives he will never forgive himself for this particular weakness. He even tells her as much.

“Oh Loghain,” Celia murmurs when he sits by her side. “You never forgive anyone for anything. But you will have to forgive me for taking my leave now, I’m afraid.”

He’s there in the end and then there’s another grave that he never visits. —

He’s fifty-one and the funeral feast they hold for Maric cuts a hole in him, bleeds him dry.

It’s the last straw, he thinks, mercifully unaware of the endless losses that will soon follow.

He’s nineteen and there are thirty men answering to him where he prances around in full disguise in order to be mistaken for a prince. To be mistaken for a commander though he’s still just a commoner and though he knows the only reason anyone listens to him in the first place is because he’s tall and broad-shouldered, stern like his father before him. Erratic and stupid as far as qualifications go, but it’s what he has.

He charges the tiny army up towards a patch of land they stand a chance of defending and they win, they do. After the next attempt, however, he carries two dead knights back to their camp and the blood never really comes away from the ridiculous shirt Maric has let him borrow.

“We’ll burn it,” he states, despising his own voice and how it shakes.

— He’s fifty-five and there are thousands upon thousands of soldiers in his ranks.

Staring at the attacking horde, keeping his mind clear and his hands steady, he sacrifices a few hundred of them as he walks away from the Blight. He knows their names, their villages; he liberated their nation so they could be born free and flock around the Hero of River Dane.

He rides back to Denerim in silence, denying everyone the right to even look at him.

“You heard the teyrn,” Ser Cauthrien snaps, a horse’s length behind him, an ugly echo. “Do as he commands.”

He’s five and sees his father’s face through the gaps between the narrow planks in the barn where the Orlesian soldiers have stormed in, shouting at each other in a language Loghain does not understand. But he understands terror and he understands _hide, darling, hide and keep really quiet _and even if he does not see his mother’s face he can hear her breathing. Quick, pained, muffled - then nothing.

Nothing as he crawls up to her later, when the joyless laughter and strange grunting has subsided.

Nothing as he sees the blood between her legs, the strange angle of her neck. He’s almost a grown man before he fully grasps what they had done, truly done to her and it makes him throw up in a bush, makes his first fumbling attempts with a girl clouded by fear of accidentally doing the same, fear of invisible lines being crossed and a bright, giggling voice in his ear I won’t break, big fellow, do you want me to beg? —

He’s fifty-five, has lived so many wars that he’s lost count and Arl Howe stands in the middle of Loghain’s office, folding his hands over his stomach.

“Highever is taken care of, my lord.”

Loghain looks into the goblet of spiced wine, pressing back the flurry of regrets and doubts.

“My men were thorough, my lord. They are dead. All but the oldest son - Fergus - though the Blight will certainly take him and we killed his heir, at any rate.” A quick, sly smile. “And made the wife spread her legs.”

The goblet trashes against the stone wall once Howe is gone, leaving a terrible noise in its wake.

He’s twenty-two and it rains in the little village north of the Wilds where he encounters Mother Ailis again. The war is over, has moved from the battlefields into the ones who were there, conducting it. He breathes war, dreams it. When he turns, he expects to see attacking forces; around every corner there’s a corpse.

Despite the rain she takes him by the hand and leads him to the place where she put all the bodies to rest, the garden of outlaws that she had known that no one would acknowledge once the fighting had subsided, the souls she has guarded ever since.

“Here is your father’s grave,” she says, softly, pressing his hand between her own. “He was so brave.”

And Loghain cries.

“Forgive me,” he says, mumbles the awkward confessions against the soaked chantry robes as Mother Ailis takes him in her arms and holds him like the small child he feels like he never could be. “Maker, forgive me.”

For all that he has done, for all that he has yet to do.

“There is nothing to forgive, Loghain,” she says but they both know that isn’t true. —

“I yield,” he tells Bryce Cousland’s daughter, kneeling before her with his sword flat on the floor, his neck bared in defeat.

He’s fifty-six and it’s not forgiveness he’s asking but close enough, the closest he will ever be to it now.

He’s eighteen and his father sends him away to protect the rebel prince who has put them all in danger but seems to have won the loyalty of Gareth of Oswin within seconds all the same.

“Don’t ask me to just leave you,” he protests, a dread so thick he cannot breathe through it is filling his entire body. He sees his father’s face through the narrow planks of the barn again, sees him return home that afternoon, drenched in Orlesian blood, telling Loghain they need to run. “I won’t do it.”

“That’s exactly what you will do,” his father replies and in that dreadful, shivering moment Loghain can feel his entire future unravel.

“Do your best,” his father says because that’s what his father always says, the only oath he will hold his son to. —

He’s fifty-seven with darkspawn blood in his veins and on his way to Orlais.

“Do your best,” Elissa tells him in Amaranthine.

Loghain nods, like he once nodded to his father. “Of course.”

He’s eighteen and defiant, his fist in Maric’s face, the loss of his father raw and painful in his throat, twisting his voice into thorns.

“You can’t knight me to make me throw my life away for you,” he spits.

He’s wrong about that; he’s wrong about so many things. —

He’s older than he thought he’d ever be and the wars are still raging inside his bones. Other people’s wars for other people’s reasons though he has stopped to think of them as such, borders so easily dissolved in the face of old gods and holes in the fabric of the sky. Humbled at long last, perhaps. It’s about time.

In a recovered Keep in the middle of the desert, he sits wedged in between the odd agents of an Inquisition he has little reason to question, though even less reason to fully grasp the scope of.

The Fereldan Commander looks at him with the gravitas of someone with a purpose to his glances and Loghain searches his memory. He remembers most lieutenants, would like to think the same goes for the soldiers though time hasn’t sharpened every sense and the details of his years of command have indeed begun to blur. He wasn’t at Ostagar, at least, that particular event has bone-hard contours at the back of his mind.

“You helped Uldric overthrow the Circle at Kinloch Hold,” the man says, finally, when they’re alone under the stars. “I served there.”

“I see,” Loghain says, because suddenly he does. “Yes, that was - unfortunate. Though it was never my intention to cause a…”

“Bloodbath?” The commander sounds grim, but there’s a softer edge to his tone, a grim sort of humour pushing through. “I wondered why you did it, back then. Now - now I have an army allied with rebel mages.”

In the distance Loghain spots the Inquisitor, a battle-scarred noble carrying an exquisite longbow and a bravery that is laced with doubt. He feels the same kind of certainty around her as he once did at the Landsmeet, though he has no desire to delve deeper into that tonight.

“Do you think she’s the Herald of Andraste then?” he asks the commander instead.

“I don’t know,” comes the reply, then a hesitant, poignant: “I don’t care. She’s the heart of this order nonetheless.”

The commander clears his throat.

”I see,” Loghain says again.

He’s five, he’s eighteen, nineteen, twenty, forty-six and fifty-five, he’s fifty-six, fifty-seven and ready to die.

Instead, he lives. —

He’s sixty-five, he’s ancient, and the nightmares of the Fade taunts him, without much success.

You destroy everything you touch, it says, as though his greatest fear would be the truths spelled out in plain sight.

“Welcome to the club,” Hawke laughs harshly beside him. “We hold meetings in Kirkwall every fortnight.”

“_I _should be invited after this,” the Inquisitor grunts, firing a burning arrow into the partly corporeal body of a rage demon.

They fight their own despair, they fight the Fade itself until the inevitable end.

“Fight well,” he says, glancing sideways into the monstrous being that blocks their only escape and he’s a young man again, looking into his father’s grim determination. “You won’t die while I draw breath.”

And raising his sword one last time he thinks of Anora, thinks of Ferelden, thinks of the oath his father made him swear. Do your best.

Perhaps he has, at long last.

History is a broken circle but the Fade snaps shut around him with a soft, liberated gasp.

#dragon age fic #Loghain Mac Tir #loghain #dragon age inquisition #My fic

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hydrospanners · 6 years ago

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13 to 24 for rhese becuase it's important and since you never talk about your ox's in the discord then it's public shaming time

Lol thanks for calling me and my extreme social awkwardness out bro. Buddy. Pal. Thanks for drawing attention to how bad I am at discord!!! And talking to groups of strangers!!! I can barely talk to one stranger!!!! Much less many strangers!!! It is hard!!! I can’t just walk into the house of an acquaintance and start boiling eggs in their kitchen!!!! I don’t care how much I like eggs!!!! It’s uncomfortable!!!! What a weird analogy to use!!!!!!! Someone please save me from myself and all these exclamation points with some questions!!!!!!

(Thank you very much for asking you are the nicest.) (Meme is here.)

13. Let’s see those outfits!

It is a great tragedy that simplicity and disavowment of material goods is part of his Jedi philosophy cause my boy Rhese loves clothes. He is dedicated to keeping it brown and simple, but he likes his fine fabrics, elegant lines, and the occasional heroic silhouette. These are his in-game outfits. My headcanon wardrobe for him is much more extensive.

14. Who is/are their favorite companion(s)?Already answered here.

15. Who is/are their least favorite companion(s)?Doc. Which is not to say that Rhese doesn’t like Doc, just that if he had to be trapped in a cave on Hoth with anyone on Rea’s crew, Doc would be his last choice. The list of Doc’s personality traits and the list of things that stress Rhese the fuck out are identical. Doc flirts too much. Doc talks too much. Doc takes too many risks. Doc is too cavalier. And probably the worst part is that Doc is real enthusiastic about boning Rhese’s sister, which would be easier to deal with if the two of them knew how to keep it in their pants until they had a little privacy, but they don’t and Rhese has been traumatized too many times and looking at Doctor Pornstache only reminds him of Things He Has Seen Rea Doing With His Own Two Eyes That Cannot Be Unseen.

16. What do they do in their spare time?Already answered here.

17. Do they have family? Siblings, parents, children?Rhese has more family than he realizes at basically every point of his life. Obviously there is his sister, Rea, who sometimes seems like a more important fixture in his life than he is. He also has another much older sister named Kieres who they left behind when they were smuggled off of Eriadu. He didn’t know she existed for the longest time, but in the years since he finally discovered her, they have had something approaching an amicable acquaintanceship that largely revolves around complaining about Rea.

Rhese’s believes both of his parents are dead, but his mother and her parents are still alive on Eriadu. He found out his father’s parents were still alive and doing well for themselves on Corellia when his grandfather begged him to come visit his dying grandmother just before the assault on Vitiate’s Fortress way back in the class story days. His grandmother has since died but his grandfather is alive and they would still talk occasionally before KotFE happened.

There’s also Liss. While not technically family, she was his aunt’s partner and pilot growing up and he always considered their whole crew his family, but Liss especially. She was always his favorite on the crew and he was hers. He thought she died with the rest of his aunt’s crew when she was betrayed, but they found each other again during the time Rea was missing on Vitiate’s fortress (isn’t it funny how much of his family that he thought was dead mysteriously turns up again when Rea isn’t around???? hmmmmm) and were very close until Rhese went MIA sometime during KotFE.

So he has family, but the only family member he’s really close to is Rea.

18. Who is their BFF? Kira. They have the sort of tried and true friendship where they bond over hating all the same things. At first they just irritated each other but, then they bonded over irritations with Rea, then their frustrations with the Senate, then how annoying Doc was, then all the problems with the Order, and by then they were best friends having secret conversations about all the ways they both felt inadequate and the things they dreamt of doing and the people they dreamt of being and also Rhese kinda wanted to make out with her.

19. Who is their rival? Everyone is Rhese’s rival at some point, but probably mostly Rea. It’s a very one-sided rivalry that she is not aware exists 85% of the time.

20. Do they have a love interest? Who?He had a mad crush on Kira once they got past their weird beef when they first met. They’re both passionate about being Jedi, about improving the Order, and about doing good for people who are often forgotten. They share similar ideas about what role the Jedi should play in the galaxy and the Republic and have similar ideas about how to make that happen. They share similar insecurities about themselves as people and as Jedi.

Basically they have a lot in common and Kira’s pretty and feisty and challenges him and stokes his emotions, good or bad, and miraculously she saw something enticing about his dumb ass, so they had a Thing™ but they are both too much alike to work well together in any kind of long-term, stable relationship so that Thing™ did not last but it didn’t exactly end either. It’s turned into a kind of on-again, off-again thing that only ever seems to be On when they are in a mood to do something dumb.

21. Would they continue their legacy by having children? Adopt? Get an apprentice?Rhese would kind of like to have kids, but it’s not something he’ll ever do. It goes against his every philosophy as a Jedi, and he knows himself well enough to know that all those controversial tenets about attachments exist for people like him. Rea might be able to handle it, but Rhese knows that for him, a family would be an express ticket to temptations he couldn’t resist. He struggles enough with his relationship with Rea, who he doesn’t even like at least 40% of the time and has never once felt responsible for. There’s no way he could bear the emotional rollercoaster of fatherhood without it ending in tragedy and he’s kinda sad about that.

Rhese wants an apprentice though. That would be just enough emotional distance for him to be able to not go crazy and he would be a good teacher. I imagine he might have had one over the course of the five KotFE years where Rea was in the wind, but I can’t say for sure what he’s been up to until BIOWARE TELLS ME WHAT THE REST OF THE CREW WAS DOING. DAMMIT BIOWARE.

22. What is their sexual orientation?He’s real demi. He can count on one hand the number of people he’s been attracted to in the whole of his life and so far they are all women but he’s not entirely convinced that means he’s only attracted to women. Just that a lot of the men he meets are terrible. (Yes he is definitely including Doc. Probably at the top of the list.)

Regardless, he’s not that concerned about it. He loves romance stories but he has spent approximately 0.000000001% of his life seeking out his own romance.

23. Do they like their role in their current situation? ei: if they are a Sith do they like being in the Sith order?This one’s tough because I’m not entirely sure what Rhese’s current situation is post-KotFE. I really need to know what canon says the rest of Rea’s crew has been up to before I can know how much of that to ignore and be sure what Rhese has been up to. I will say that no matter what, Rhese still thinks of himself as a Jedi and that is a critical component of his identity. But he’s probably massively disappointed in the Order and how things went after Zakuul invaded. He’s probably bitter. He’s probably decided he’s one of the only True Jedi left. He’s probably formed his own subsect of the Jedi, probably consisting only of himself.

TL;DR Rhese will always love being a Jedi but he is deeply unsatisfied with the current state of the Jedi Order.

24. If they could be part of another group, what would it be? You can choice from Old Republic, Expanded Universe, or Cinematic Universe.Rhese would be Luke Skywalker’s biggest fanboi. Give him that sweet Cinematic Universe. He is here for that hero’s journey shit and he will stay for the Classic Jedi Retreat to Isolation in Bitterness and Guilt Gambit and he will nut on that self-sacrificial redemption. He wants to live there. Doesn’t even matter that it’s objectively terrible cause his life is already kinda that.

#swtor #rhese velaran #velaran legacy #ask meme #hoiist

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rhunae · 7 years ago

Photo

This is a self indulgent mess set right after Trespasser. It’s a big fuck you and twin finger salute to Bioware because gods dammit, I want my dragons. So yeah, this is self indulgent dragon age trash. Oh, and it’s long, and that’s even after shortening it. Sorry. (Ao3)

Words: 2484

Serafina Gets Her Dragon

After the Council meeting - 9:44 Dragon

Tall grass swayed along the worn path, brushing at her ankles and calves. At the archway, Serafina turned to scan over the two giant wolf statues down the hill where she left her companions. Cole lay along the spine of one of the wolf statues, his head resting against the back of its neck, the small elven toddler snuggled atop his chest, cradled in his arms. Cole made a good ‘uncle’; he was attentive and enthralled with the little elf. Pushing up on tippy toes, she searched for Bull and Dorian, but she could see nothing in the high golden grasses. She snickered softly to herself.

Ambling with a reverent gait into the empty coliseum, the field lay untouched for so long, it may have lain fallow for eons before she walked it’s forgotten grounds. Two years passed since the last time she tread across the arena, when Flemeth sent her here to claim the elven goddess’ guardian against Corypheus. That help came in the form of a dragon.

Serafina did not expect a dragon this time. She didn’t expect anything. She was going to beg for help. Then what? Probably nothing. It was futile to try. How long had the priests and sentinels prayed to Mythal with no answer? How long had her people prayed to Mythal and received no answer? It was an act of desperation, but seeing Solas again revealed a raw and gaping wound she thought scarred over long ago; she didn’t know what else to do.

Her boots crunched underfoot, kicking up dust from the packed dirt and gravel. A group of robins pecked and scratched at the ground scattered into the wind when she reached them. At the Exalted Council, she intended to dissolve the inquisition and return to Wycome, to return to her clan where Theneras could grow up among his kin. She hoped she had enough time to give him sufficient memories to cling to as he grew older without her and never knowing his father. All that changed when Solas masterfully manipulated her through a series of eluvians, stepping metaphorically back in time to crumbling ruins when proudly wore the badge of Fen’Harel, and what that meant before the legends and myths were distorted by propaganda and time.

Pausing before the steps to the shrine, Serafina stared at the dragon statue of Mythal for a long, quiet moment, trying to form the words to move a goddess to respond; one she thought long lost to her People, squirreled away into the heavens by a Trickster’s lie.

“Mythal! Flemeth!” Serafina glanced around, birds chirped in the trees surrounding the coliseum. She thought she could imagine the older witch canting her head at the sound of her name. Maybe she was listening. Maybe she didn’t care. Solas removed her vallaslin, slave markings of an era long gone, but drinking from the Well of Sorrows made her a servant, with or without those marks. Would Mythal respond now? Did Mythal respond to the prayers of Abelas and the other sentinels? It was beginning to sound like a repetitive mantra.

“I’m not seeking justice or vengeance of a wrong done to me. I call upon you as the Mother of our People. As the drinker of the Well of Sorrows, your servant. I am asking, begging, for guidance. I fell in love…”

Sighing, Serafina paced in meditation before the shrine, the sound of her boots on the gravel creating a rhythmic tune, “My wolf, my guardian, my protector, my heart,… left my side to save his People.”

Should she had claimed him so possessively? She remembered no stories relating to Mythal and the Dread Wolf implying intimacy. Solas was merely reverent at the temple. Would Flemeth answer, knowing the tales of the first witch of the wilds? Maybe she didn’t think this through. Maybe this truly was a mistake.

Rubbing her right hand fingers against her brow, what remained of her left arm hung useless at her side, her shoulders slouched in dejection as her thoughts turned increasingly negative and bitter, “I asked to help him. He refused. He walks the Din’anshiral. I— I can’t allow him to do this alone. If he’s going to change,… no, destroy my world, I need… I need… Fuck!” She ground her teeth, “Help me, Flemeth.”

Sinking to her knees, Serafina pressed her palm against her right eye, her voice thick with emotion, “The Return of the Elvhen People does not need to mean the death of Thedas— of my people. I don’t want to die. Help me merge his world with mine. Help me, help him. Help me save him, save us, save our so-.” Serafina’s voice cracked on the last.

Pressing her forehead to the stone steps, tears fall silent from the corners of her eyes and plop with a less than dignified drip on the stone. She lay there sobbing on the steps to the shrine. Too distraught to pull herself up. All the emotions laid bare, raw, and overwhelming.

Flicker. A series of dreams left her reeling from their intensity and overall peculiar weirdness. As the last of the dreams faded. The ground shook. Sparkling light was flicked in her face, then the dream melted away to darkness. Leaving her dizzy and disorientated.

Serafina startled awake. The ground shook again. Small pebbles and sand bounced in place. Something large huffed heat and the stench of decaying meat close to her face. Turning her head slowly, all she saw was green scales and giant teeth just a mere few inches from her face.

Screeching, she back peddled away and bumped into the dragon statue of Mythal.

The dragon tilted her head to look at her from one golden eye, then bounced away with two powerful leaps to the other end of the coliseum, her head swinging from side to side, her tail swinging opposite to maintain balance.

“Boss?!” Iron Bull’s voice cut through the distance as he ran under the archway into the vacant space of the coliseum.

“Yes,” she called out to him, still trying to regain her bearing after being sucked into a series of weird dreams, then suddenly dumped awake. From the corner of her eye, she could see Iron Bull hesitate, “Are you ok, boss?” He called out. “I would attack but last time we were here, you gained a dragon…”

“I-I think so.” Serafina rose carefully, struggling for her initial balance, still not used to general movement with a missing limb.

“She wants to help.” Cole wondered in awe, his daggers in hand but hesitant to close the distance.

The Tevinter remained near the arch, Thenaras tucked in the sling close to his chest. “You’re— you won’t need me for this, will you? Maybe some barriers? I got the kid…”

The dragon continued to swing her head from side to side, keeping the four in her line of sight, huffing small clouds of smoke from her nostrils.

“No, if she meant me harm, she would have,” Serafina gestured for them to stand down as she warily trudged closer, her steps slow and cautious; the voices from the Well of Sorrows whispering across the distances, instructing her.

The dragon shifted and settled her belly against the ground and tucked her lime green and black marble colored wings loosely against her body.

“This dragon was the one we saved from the Qunari. We set her free.” It surprised her, an act of mercy by the infamous dragon killer, but the inquisitor didn’t have the heart to kill the tied down and tortured beast. It didn’t feel right. Did the dragon know she only hunted dragons that threatened human towns and settlements?

“Yes, we helped her. So she is here to help you. She’s in pain.” Glancing over her shoulder, she noticed that Cole had resheathed his daggers and was now squatting beside the Iron Bull with a curious expression.

Nodding, “Yes, I see her horns were chopped off.” Serafina stepped closer until her and the dragon were only several feet from one another. “I noticed briefly when I was trying to set her free, but hadn’t got a good look before. It looks like she is fighting an infection. The Qunari cut it pretty close to the quick. Hey, Dorian, do you have any of that ointment?”

“Let me check, “Dorian called out over the distance.

“Yeah. They called her Ataashi.” Iron Bull replied, “It means ‘glorious one’ in Qunlat.”

“They certainly named her well, Bull.”

The dragon opened her large maw and from deep in her throat sound waves rolled out over her tongue and blasted against her, sending her red hair into a flurry behind her and nearly knocking her off her feet.

“Uh, boss?”

“She’s communicating, Bull.”

“You understood that?”

“The Voices from the Well are … translating?”Reaching at her side, she pulled out her dagger, but when she glanced to where her left hand would be, she lifted her stump. She ground her teeth in frustration, “I need a little help here. Cole?”

The sound of his boots shuffling across the expanse increasingly grew louder until he stopped beside her, “She’s beautiful.” The Spirit of Compassion always seemed to hold a sense of awe in his voice.

“She is. Can you slice open my palm?” Serafina glanced at him, offering him the dagger in hand by the blade.

Cole peered at her under the brim of his large hat, the pale blue of his eyes partially hidden by his blond strands, “Are you certain? Won’t this hurt you?” “Only for a moment.”

He took the dagger, and as she held out her right palm, he sliced the length of it from between her thumb and forefinger and down across the fleshy part of her palm. She hissed as the pain cut quick. Making a fist, she approached Ataashi as the dragon opened her mouth and slid her tongue partway between sharp teeth. Pumping her fist several times, she drained some of her life essence atop the grooved tongue. The serpent tongue slid back in and the dragon closed her mouth. Stepped back, she felt a nudge when Cole tapped her shoulder to hand her a white linen handkerchief from his pocket.

“Thank you.” She took the handkerchief, but stared dumbfounded as she stared between her right hand and the stump of her left arm. Grounding her teeth again in frustration, the feeling of helplessness weighed heavily against her chest.

“Let me help.” Cole offered, taking the cloth out of her hand and wrapping it himself, tying it off with a gentle tug.

“Again, thank you.”

As the human and elf were busy, the dragon stretched out one of her paws, a single claw stretched out and pricked the metacarpal pad of her paw until dark, red blood oozed from the weal. Once the makeshift bandage was secure, Serafina stepped forward and knelt down beside the dragon’s paw.

“You’re going to—” Iron Bull was closer than before, fascinated by the process of a dragon willingly offering blood.

“You’re going to drink it? Like the Iron Bull when he chose to be a Reaver?”

“There are many uses for dragon’s blood.” Dorian replied quietly, standing to the side and slightly behind the Iron Bull, keeping the child in his arms shielded.

Rummaging in one of her pouches, the inquisitor pulled out a worn wooden cup and carefully pressed the lid against the oozing blood. It flowed thickly into her cup, filling the cup halfway, then Serafina rose and stepped back away. She stared at the dark liquid as she listened to the whispers from the Voices of the Well.

“Dorian, will you help me with this? Bull and Cole, will you attend Ataashi? Cut off the ropes and apply the ointment to her horn stubs?”

As the Tal-Vashoth and Spirit of Compassion attended the dragon, she led Dorian a few feet away where they knelt facing one another. The Tevinter held the cup in both hands, holding it forward to keep Thenaras’ chubby fingers from grabbing it. The elven toddler whimpered with dismay.

“This isn’t for you, little one,” Serafina said, ruffling the shock of ginger atop his head. Pulling her hand from the toddler, her hand hovered over the wooden cup, the blue glow of magic directed into the thick dragon’s blood. The Voices told her the magic to perform, a form of blood magic she never even considered.

“This is fascinating. What is the ritual?”

“It’s to help with the bonding between me and Ataashi. I’ll be able to call for her from miles away.” The voices recited a series of elven words, then she repeated them aloud. The blood fizzled and bubbled briefly.

Dorian tipped the cup towards him as the blood fizzled, and just at that moment, Theneras reached out and dropped his tiny, pudgy fingers into the cup.

“Oh no!”

Theneras looked right at her and stuck his fingers into his mouth.

“No! Honey, no.”

The toddler made several faces of disgust, then stuck out his hand and tried to shake the blood off his fingers, but it was too late. “Off! Off!” He ordered whoever would listen.

Dorian handed the cup to her, then he quickly got out a cloth and wiped off the toddler’s hands.

With the Voices in her head frantically whispering for her to drink, she quickly drank the contents in the cup. There was no time to prepare herself, to find her nerve to drink dragon’s blood. But there it was. A thick malaise flowing thickly down her throat. It was tangy and metallic, and tasted of sulfur and smoke. And life. Life blossomed from the pit of her belly and spread to her limbs. A cloud swept across her mind, ruffling memories she had long forgotten, then clarity settled behind her eyes. The power of Ataashi’s blood not only gave her a bond with the beast, but also raw power flowed through her veins.

“So, what will happen to the boy?” The strain in Dorian’s voice was palpable, the guilt heavily written on his brow.

Tilting her head, she listened to the voices, “The bond is weak because Ataashi did not taste his blood. He may be more powerful as he grows up than without it. He may even make a powerful warrior, or mage. He may have an affinity with other dragons, since he was not carefully bonded to this one. It’s really hard to say. Being so young, maybe nothing.”

With the ritual done, and Cole and Iron Bull finished caring for the dragon, the two retreating from the beast with a strange look of fascination and awe. Ataashi flexed her wings out, rose up and beat her wings until she could propel herself from the ground and fly off.

“Boss, life is not boring around you.”

“She’s happy we helped. She feels free.”

#rhuewrites #serafina lavellan #dorian #iron bull #cole #solas #ataashi #flemythal #self indulgent mess #my writing #there be dragons here

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runespoor7 · 7 years ago

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Iris’ Broken Circle: the end

She ends up letting the desire demon and her bewitched Templar go, because I managed to convince myself I don't have any other Warden that might do that (...*side-eyes Mahariel anyway*), and you can let them go by saying the situation they're in is intriguing, rather than because you're touched by the love story.

Now, on to the Fade!

- fourth time playing it (or maybe fifth? I don't remember if I'd gone so far with Aeducan the first time, before I decided I wanted to play it otherwise) if I count the time I was just watching Dem play. I still love it, the gameplay is so different from the rest of the game, and I always love “voyages to the centre of the mind”. This time, I had Morrigan and Zevran with me as opposed to... Alistair and Leliana... so that might have helped with my impression that I was doing new things. Iris is also the first mage I'm playing through the Fade, and Mana Clash makes short work of a lot of things. Golems are huge threats, but aside from that...

- the entry vision: it's a given that for a lot of PC it's not going to be much their characters wish for (aside from the assurance that the Blight is over), but in Iris' case it was almost a total misfire. It wasn't more of a misfire than it was with Tabris, but...”You've been at Weisshaupt for some time now/The Gray Wardens shall be keepers of history. We shall tell tales […] of a more tumultuous time, that others may rejoice in knowing that that time is past./Can you not be content with the peace I offer” is pretty much guaranteed Iris kryptonite. What about the travels. What about the thrills??

- upon meeting Niall, I learnt that Iris had decided he's a demon. Apparently her rule for the Fade is “if it's not me, it's a trick”. Not that she minds: if it's not her, it means she can trick it, or negotiate with it, or otherwise deal with it, as the case may be. But still, as far as she's concerned, Niall is Fake!Niall.

- after running around trying on four other shapes (it is pretty cool, she's tempted to ask Morrigan for how to do it), she finally stumbles into... Zevran's nightmare.

- At this point I note that Zevran's mind is casting two Dalish elves in the roles of his Crow torturers, which reminds me: canon/early canon said that Dalish are considered adults after they've earned their vallaslin. Which involves enduring the tattooing without crying out. If you do, you're considered immature, and the Keeper stops; better luck in a few months! I remember fans wondering why we never saw people with half-finished vallaslin (there's a Doylist answer, but let's assume for a moment the devs would make the assets for a background NPC), and now I look at Zevran, with his tattoo on half his face, and with his story that he'd fled to join the Dalish once but the reality didn't live up to his expectations, and with his mind deciding Dalish would stand in for the Crows, and I wonder.

(in case you're wondering, Zevran's tattoo doesn't look that much like a DA:O vallaslin, however unfinished, unless you assume that different clans have their own takes on each vallaslin – which seems much more likely to me than assuming they're all using the same without regional variants! If we're admitting variants, based on the available designs, Zevran's tat could be part of a vallaslin of: June, Dirthamen, or Andruil. I feel Andruil would be a good design for Zevran, perhaps even the best suited to him with Falon'Din. But if Zevran was ditching the Crows, would he have stuck to an identity as a hunter? It's less unlikely than “friend of the dead”, probably.)

- she still gets Fade!Zevran out of there. (Me, I note that Zevran's first reaction being “but you're not supposed to be here!” when the Warden says something is incredibly pleasing to my shipping Iris/Zevran.) Then Fade!Zevran starts to disappear and she reaches out, and then he's gone and she finds herself a bit nonplussed as she puts her arm down and wonders if that Zevran was real or not. Probably real. The nightmare held similarities to her own entry vision in, it felt like an illusion meant to keep Zevran trapped. She remains staring at the rack for a minute after Fade!Zevran's disappeared.

- then she finds Morrigan, and Morrigan is-- oh, Iris cannot imagine a demon impersonating Morrigan with such accuracy. It's the real Morrigan, and she's as aware of Fake!Flemeth being a fake and she in the Fade that Iris has been for a while now. She's also exceedingly annoyed with the proceedings, both the interactions with the spirit, and her subsequent disappearing, in a manner that I-the-player finds absolutely hilarious. (Not related: I note that Fake!Flemeth slaps Morrigan for not showing respect, and Morrigan says “there, that's more like it!”. I assume it's because Fake!Flemeth's attempts at cloyingness were even faker than this, but I don't think I'll take it for meaning Flemeth was physically abusive with Morrigan, especially about “respect”. I can imagine Flemeth hitting Morrigan when she'd returned with her mirror, though.)

- Wynne's nightmare is so very very creepy. The part where the dead apprentice speaks and asks her to stay with them in the embrace of the earth. Iris thought that was creeeeepy, and that's not a reaction she has very often. Connor was grotesque; Amalia's fascination with the talking cat was disquieting and kind of creepy; dead apprentice begging their teacher to join them in death? Creeeeeeeepy.

Wynne says she's always had an affinity for the Fade, and Iris' gut reaction was to think that she, Iris, really doesn't, but she's had to pause her reaction. She does find navigating the Fade easy, or at least... kind of pleasant. She can obtain what she wants from its inhabitants. Isn't that having an affinity, too? It's like since her Harrowing, and with the multiple opportunities she's had, she's good at this. Before, most of what she knew about the Fade came lectures on the dangers of the Fade and assigned readings. They made it sound so boring. And it was never practical, of course, so it was just... endless lecturing... no wonder she'd liked spellcasting better. Making things go boom = much more fun! And even so they had to go oh so slowly. Again, no wonder Iris had to try things on her own. ...despite Jowan's fear that she would get in trouble. She was careful, though, partly to humor him and partly because she knew better, she's always known better. So very often she had to be content with imagining how her spell would go if she cast it like so and so, as her testing time was always limited. So even on her own, it was slow, she had to hide, and then sometimes she had to come up with a clever lie on the spot, when she was just a little too good at something they weren't supposed to have studied yet. ...Until finally Irving took her under his wing.

- to truly understand how easy playing as Iris made soloing the bosses, you need to remember that three of the four bosses are magic-based (demons and such), so Mana Clash does them in. And the last boss is blocked behing a Massive Door, so you can just cast Tempests and Shocks and Cones of Cold until he dies, without ever opening the door.

- Iris is almost entirely lacking in empathy regarding Niall, to an extent that I find surprising even for her. She finds him whiny. She talks the talk of saying right-ish things because he's dying, but she's got things to be doing here. (“can't he die any faster” - not an actual thing she's thinking but the gist) Up to the point where he starts talking about his mother, and how she used to tell him, before the Circle, that he was meant for greatness, greater than their ancestors ever dreamt of, and then Iris snaps. “Are you done reminiscing?”

Then we're out of the Fade again, and then we meet Cullen.

...yep, so Cullen is pretty lucky there's no option to fight and kill him, because I wouldn't do it as he's a returning character, but I would sure need finagling to ensure Iris doesn't. If Iris wanted “to guarantee that no abominations […] live”, she'd start with him. Only way to be sure, right? How long did he spend with only blood mages and demons for company, how is he any less a risk as the others up there? He as good as admitted to demons tempting him and showing him things he wanted, right?

On the bright side, Zevran comments on Cullen revealing that he has a crush on Amell. (“Someone was quite the little heartbreaker when they were an apprentice. My, my.” I am playing the perfect character for this, I am so satisfied.) On the less bright side, it's actually less rewarding than what Iris thought – she thought it was... she basically thought she was exploiting a crush and Cullen being very much a templar apprentice*, see. If it turns out that Cullen was in love with her, well, suddenly, nothing she did mattered. It wasn't that she was good at manipulation, it was just that he'd fabricated something made-up in his head.

*I would love to get why there where only male templars in Kinloch Hoch. Doylist explanation is that Bioware decided it shouldn't be gendered after the game was out, but I want a Watsonian explanation... ;_; are we supposed to imagine there are also female templars in Kinloch Hoch? ...probably, actually. (;_; it's very hard given what we see in Broken Circle) See Templar lady chasing Anders. Or maybe Greagoir sends templar ladies on the roads and keeps only guys standing watch on the actual Tower. Maybe because it's supposed to keep down the risk of fraternization?

But on the other hand, it means that when Cullen's going off the deep end in Kirkwall, Iris can look back at her past self and kick herself for not making more of an effort to put him down when she could have had the opportunity! (the problem was Wynne.)(chances are Iris never will, but you never know, right?)

- the convo with Uldred is so different from every other confrontation with Uldred I ever made! There's an option to say “I suppose we are similar, in some ways” unprompted which I don't remember seeing before – it's probably because Iris is a blood mage – and I hastened to take it. I like that I was able to play this confrontation in an IC manner, that was pretty fun, from Iris saying “of course [some mages] are [stubbornly resisting you]! You're trying to destroy their lives!” to “No, I think it is you that should serve me” (that latter was mostly because she got a kick out of saying it, but you never know with demons). At the very end of the fight, Zevran fell, and Iris had no choice but to turn to fueling her last couple of spells with her own blood, so that was something. When Uldred addressed Irving to tell him she was there, she suddenly wondered if Uldred was going to tell Irving she was a blood mage, she knows Uldred could tell.

- Iris' feelings about Irving are complicated and so better shoved in a drawer in the darkest corner of her mind and sealed.

- ...she does have the most inappropriate moment of glee when Irving says “curse whoever insisted the Circle be built in a tower.” Ha, take that, Alistair! ...and then she immediately chides herself because that's Irving making a joke, and being mentally friendly with Irving is no-no.

- and then it's back to Greagoir and Iris wishing she got Cullen killed, and then Iris wondering if Greagoir didn't get stealth possessed or something because he thanks her and tells her she's proven herself to be a friend of both the Circle and the templars, and Iris has never been the friend of either of the two one day in her life and if she could drown all the people who'd talked about killing the mages in the Tower she'd do it in an instant and not feel a hint of remorse?

- I the player am not shipping Irving/Greagoir any less than usual but I think Iris has big enough blinders about both of them not to think about it rn. I think she considered it when she was younger, and now their interactions are just their interactions. It's not something worth analyzing whether they're fucking or not, it's just business as usual. It could come up at some point if Zevran asks her about her life or that return to the Circle or if she ever finds it in her to open up about how complicated her feelings about Irving have gotten.

The complicated feelings about Irving that Iris is totally not having aren't getting any less complicated by the convo with Irving himself. “I am glad you arrived when you did. It's almost as though the Maker Himself sent you.” So she's going to answer that as neutrally as she can, because no feelings, feelings are bad. “The Blight drove me here to seek aid.”

Holy shit I had forgotten you can turn down Wynne's offer to join. ...That's... a little bit tempting, because blood magic. But Iris isn't a Circle mage anymore, Grey Wardens aren't bound by the Circle's rules, and there is a Blight to be won.

#warden iris amell #broken circle #zevran arainai

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bpdanakins · 5 years ago

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kotfe + kotet thoughts:

the mechanics during your fight with arcann are.... a little clunky. i didn’t know what i was supposed to be doing and TWICE i was stuck, unable to move whatsoever. the first time it killed me. the second time i somehow was able to get myself unstuck somehow and it was mostly by panicking sdfkljjfklsd

kaveri: “i am BEYOND light and dark!” me: girl shut up you’re still light side and even the dang alignment bar that is totally something that has narrative weight and not at all is just a gameplay mechanic says you’re maxed light side go home (no but really i cackled bc it was SO uncomfortable like i hate that line of dialogue SO much and sdflkjsflkjdfkjl i hate it but ugh, i suffer it for the post)

anyways!!! i’m still having my heart broken over senya and her kids! nor have i forgotten who the real bad guy is bioware

bioware really did give us SO many shots of your character standing with the crew and looking bad ass in SoR and KotFE and i thank them for it. and then at the end of kotfe when all the ships are rolling in to join the alliance???? 👌nice

let’s uh.... let’s talk about the walker. if you want to do walker segments right, look to jfo. if you want to do them frustratingly, look to swtor. (admittedly it wasn’t THAT bad i just.... found it so pointless and not even really fun)

when you jetpack across the chasm..... kaveri fsejklpdslkjd for some reason she glitched and flew sideways to the cave i laughed SO loudly and i wish i knew how to properly gif it bc i think i even got it recorded

Vaylin’s starting KotET looking like her bad ass “Betrayed” trailer self. Which just makes me emo over this stupid family again.

we’re gonna address another criticism i’ve seen of these expansions which is arcann’s “healing” or whatever. i know people hate it and think it’s a bit of a cop out (which is fair), but to me that entire section was more about senya than him? it was literally a mother willing to lay down her life to give her son a second chance.

i think a lot of problems people are having with these characters is that they’re so messy, and their situation is messy, bc all three of them are victims who went through horrific things by ONE DUDE who we have seen to literally devour the entire life of a planet, just because. HE is the bad guy. Senya, Arcann and Vaylin are all complicated and messy bc of what they’ve been through. Vaylin says that Senya “always hated her” bc Senya begged their father to help train her. Vaylin says that Senya told Valk that she (Vaylin) was “dangerous”, and of course to a child that comes across as painful and hurtful, but we also hear from Senya that Vaylin literally crippled a guy for touching one of her toys. She was dangerous, and Senya didn’t know how to help her.

But we see Senya try again and again to help her kids. We know the dark side is a liar, we know that all of the kids were abused and manipulated, we know they were taught to think their mother “weak” for not staying in an abusive situation, etc. The point is that the truth of the situation lies somewhere between all of these interpretations, that these are all people who went through a lot of shit, that the strength in their writing comes from these conflicting points of view.

Vaylin’s feelings of abandonment make total sense, but we know Senya did not leave bc she hated Vaylin or was weak. Senya’s done all of this to save both Arcann and Vaylin. She’s willing to die to save Arcann, to just give him another chance. The healing scene was about Senya, and yes, it obviously will push Arcann’s plot along and will tie in to his turning back to the light, etc, and it comes across as kinda lazy to have like, a magic ritual and suddenly the dark side tyrant is all healed and okay now or smth, but to me it just seemed like a scene that was for Senya. To show how far Senya will go for her kids.

And I know that I’m only on the second chapter of KotET and that we learn much more about exactly what Vaylin goes through later, and I also totally feel some of the criticisms tossed BioWare’s way for the handling of Vaylin so maybe my point will change as I go along, but truly to me rn it feels a lot like another situation in which the fandom is blaming a character for all the wrongdoing of another. Like... people hate Senya bc of what happened to Vaylin, but the person who hurt Vaylin was Vaylin’s father. Valk hurt Senya too. Senya’s not a perfect character and she was complicit to what happened in a way, but there was truly only so much she could have done and she did try, several times over.

Vaylin blames her mother bc of course she does. This is a pain she’s been carrying since childhood, and she was almost encouraged, in a way, to blame her mother. Fandom, in turn, agree with this POV bc they feel for Vaylin. But the blame goes once again to the old white guy Sith Dick manipulating all of them (all of us) from behind the scenes. He is the one mostly at fault, not Senya who was another of his victims. And it just rubs me the wrong way that people dislike Senya so much but don’t say jack shit about the real bad guy. But sure, blame the victim for the abuser... victimizing someone else. lol

(Reminds me of another situation in which victims are blamed in SW when they Big Evil is right. there. but you know what? Must be a coincidence.)

#liz's gamer problems

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adaminashepardcommander · 7 years ago

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Lover’s Dance When They’re Feeling in Love - F!Shenko

Pairing: F!Shenko Rating: T+ Summary: A look at Kaidan Alenko and Adamina Shepard’s love through the span of time. Author’s Note: This is mostly canon with a couple of Not-So Mass Effect canon elements that are from my boyfriend (adrianomartelandsiblings) and my canon. Bioware owns Kaidan Alenko and all Mass Effect elements. Adamina’s thoughts, choices, and children belong to me!

Dancing is so awkward at fifteen. It’s even more awkward dancing with your best friend who you just so happen to be in love with. She’s stepped on his foot a couple of times, blushing hard, whispering sorry. He smiles and nudges her feet on top of his. He whispers ‘I’ve got you,’ and pulls her closer. It’s less awkward. She laughs and lays her head on his shoulder. It’s their first dance, and he’d love for it to never end, but it will end. Their friendship, however, will strengthen thanks to this. Dancing is so intimate at a wedding. Especially, when it’s your own wedding. Even more so when you’ve married your best friend. She’s gotten better at this. She hasn’t stepped on his foot except for once, and he just laughed it off. He smiles and presses his forehead against hers. Her lavender eyes shine so bright with love and excitement. He’s excited too, but he’s always hoped that they would end up here. She presses her lips against his. People are clapping, but all of his attention is on his new wife. Dancing is hard to do with a little one. It’s even harder when you have two little ones. He’s gotten a little time off and finally gets to be with his best friend again. She laughs when he puts his hands on her hips, humming a tune in her ear. She complains about needing to cook, but she’s accepting his hand and letting him pull her against him. Her lavender eyes sparkle with glee, and that’s when their son and daughter whine that they want to dance too. It’s no longer him dancing with her; it’s him dancing with their daughter and her dancing with their son. There’s laughter, and all he can do is smile. Dancing is impossible to do with her gone. His best friend has been gone a year, and he hasn’t gone anywhere near music. He’s signed it off. His friends don’t care and pull him to the crowded bar on the Citadel. There’s a woman there giving him bedroom eyes, but this is their song that’s playing. His mind flies to a happier time, and he gets up to leave. One of his friends tries to stop him, but he’s out of the bar before an argument can be made. Lavender eyes and a laugh ghosting in his ear. Dancing is the last thing on his mind on Horizon. The Collectors are taking people left and right, but not him. He can’t understand why. The stasis wears off, and he’s running towards the enemy ship, trying to save his people. One of the colonists is yelling at a woman, and slowly he recognizes her. Those lavender eyes are full of regret and fear. One of her companions yells at the colonist, claiming that the colonist would be dead too if it weren’t for her. Her other companion nudges her, and lavender eyes find chocolate. The colonist walks off, and he’s walking towards her. He hears her take a deep breath before he’s wrapping her in his arms. She whispers his name against his neck, and all he wants is to kiss her senseless. But he doesn’t, he needs to know why she isn’t dead. Arguing, begging, pleading, are things he never thought he’d have to do with her. She can’t be his best friend. She has to be a clone. That’s not her, but she looks just like her. Just like his best friend, his wife. He rubs his forehead remembering those eyes. They were so full of hope for a solid moment before he dashed those hopes right down the drain. Now he’s sitting before his terminal trying to write a letter to her. To explain his actions, but there aren’t any words that are coming to mind that will suffice. He glances at the picture beside his hand. They’re smiling, laughing, dancing. The words finally come to him, and he’s able to finish the email to her. He presses the send button and goes back to reminiscing about happier days. The reapers have come, an AI has tried to kill him, and now Cerberus is trying to over-run the Citadel. He wants to kill any and every Cerberus soldier that comes near the council. He’s got three of the four councilors on the roof, and there’s someone following them. The doors of the elevator slide open and reveal her. Lavender eyes ablaze with anger. He’s ordering her to put her weapon down while she’s trying to tell him that there’s a mole on the council’s payroll. They’re dancing with danger, with death; one wrong move and he’ll kill her, and that scares him. He hears Udina call her a traitor, and the anger in her voice causes him to do a double-take. He’s never heard her that hateful, not even when they were chasing after Saren. Udina, the bastard, grabs the Asari councilor and threatens to kill the councilor. She’s not having any of that. He hears her cock her gun, ready to blow Udina’s head off. She pleads with him to trust her. She’s never been okay with a death on her head. When Ashley died, she locked herself in her room until they reached the Citadel. He remembers her crying, cursing herself. He flips around and points the gun at Udina’s head, but he doesn’t give the bastard the chance she’s given him. He pulls the trigger, and it hits Udina right between the eyes. He hears her sigh in relief behind him. It’s weird being back on the Normandy. And even though she has said that he’s more than welcome there, he doesn’t feel it. She’s skirting around him, away from him. She’s keeping her distance, and he knows why. It’s all this. This stress that she’s putting herself through, and he just wants her to relax. She’s helped out all of her old teammates, even Miranda on Horizon. He never thought he’d go back to that planet and now he wishes he hadn’t. He knows that Anderson has ordered her to take some shore leave, but she’s not complying. So he takes to the helm and tells Joker to take them to the Citadel. Thankfully, the pilot agrees. Jeff’s seen how she’s acting, seen how stressed she is. She comes down from her room asking who changed her course, and he intercepts her. He tells her, orders her, to take the shore leave she’s already been ordered on. She wants to argue, he can see it, but she doesn’t. She just turns around and heads back to her room. She’ll probably try to spend all of her shore leave in that damn room, but he won’t let her. The start of this shore leave has been very much a miss. She’d gone out with Joker as ordered by Anderson, and she’d gotten shot at. Of course, she’d gotten shot at. He’s come to her rescue. His biotics flaring a bright blue as he slams down a couple of the mercenaries he’d been fighting when she rounds the corner. She is wearing a light blue dress, and he feels his throat contract. She’s gorgeous even as broken as she looks. She smirks at him, shaking those hips as she walks by. His jaw drops and hell yeah, he’s staring. He likes what he sees, always has. When they finally get back to the apartment thanks to Wrex’s help, he follows her upstairs to see to her wounds. She turns to look at him, lavender eyes shining. He takes a step towards her, places his hands on her hips, and leans in slowly. She accepts the kiss that he presses to her lips, a small moan leaving her throat. It’s going to take Liara a little while to track down the gun that she found, so he’s going to take advantage of this small window of just them. Dancing is just a way of keeping eyes off them, but the way she presses against him, the little laugh she gives as his hands slide to her hips, the way that dress fits her body so perfect he’s sure everyone is watching already. He’s died and gone to heaven. That is until Brooks interrupts them with a problem. She promises that there will be more to come later, and he wholeheartedly believes her. Once they’re back to the apartment, he pulls her upstairs and presses her against the wall of her room. She nuzzles against his neck, pressing open mouth kisses to the base of his throat. They want each other even more with each passing moment, but there’s still a bad guy that wants to kill her, so their time together will be cut short. It feels like forever since the party ended. She wanted to celebrate capturing her clone. Miranda has some ideas for the clone, but he doesn’t want to know them. He’s more focused on the woman beneath him. She looks so relaxed, so happy. He leans down and nips at her neck, right at her pulse point. The way she cries his name makes him do it again just to pull his name from her lips one more time. She claws at his back, wraps her legs tighter around his waist, pulls him closer to her. He’s forgotten how amazing she is like this. It’s been too long since they’ve been intimate, but it doesn’t feel like it’s been that long with how he still knows where to touch her, to kiss her, to bite her. She knows the same about his body, and when they’re done he kisses her, slow and sweet. She whispers that she loves him, and he replies in kind. He wants to slit the Illusive Man’s throat for the way he talked about her. She doesn’t deserve that; she never deserved any bad thing that has ever happened to her. He wraps his arms around her waist. It’s not the place or the time, but he wants her to know that he’s deeply sorry. He should have believed her. She nods and smiles small, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. She was used, and that makes him sick. She pulls away from his arms and starts down a hallway. He swears that he will fix this, no matter what. It’s been months since they’ve set foot on earth, but this doesn’t feel right. He’s standing by a building, checking in with his biotic students when she walks up. She tells him that she’s spoken to their kids, like this wasn’t hard enough. He sighs and says that this might be goodbye. She takes his hand and says she’s going to fight to see him again. He squeezes her hand in apology. She has to find Anderson. They both know that, but she doesn’t want to leave him. He doesn’t want her to leave. She takes a step away from him, but he’s not ready. He pulls her against him, kissing her with a promise. He whispers, “I can’t lose you again.” She touches his cheek, closing her eyes tight as she pulls away from him. She’ll see him again, there’s no way in hell she’s going out there without him. His ears ring for a moment as he feels hands on his waist. He can hear his name, just barely. His vision finally straightens out just as the Normandy lands. She’s going to make him go back. She pulls him to the ship with Vega’s help. He feels his weight transferred to the buffer soldier. The realization hits him like a bottle to the head, she’s not coming with them. “Shepard. Adamina.” He calls out to her. She’s standing at the end of the hangar door, watching the fire fight in the distance. She turns and looks at him, “You’ve gotta get out of here.” He shakes his head, “That’s not going to happen. Not without you.” “Don’t argue with me, Kaidan.” Her voice is a command, but he can hear the tiny waiver. “Don’t leave me behind.” He begs. He can’t do this. Can’t lose her. He begs her with his eyes, come back, come with me. She strides up the hangar door, “No matter what happens…” She reaches him, touches his face, “remember that I love you, always.” His eyes search hers, chocolate meeting lavender, “I…” He starts, and then tries again, “I love you, too.” She kisses him, gently and whispers again how she loves him. How she’s always loved him, will always love him. She takes a step backwards, out of his reach. He’s grabbing for her, reaching for her hand, begging her to stay let someone else deal with this mess. He wants her to be selfish for once, but she won’t, and he knows that. She’s off the hangar door and running, next to her clone, the one that Miranda had ideas for. This must have been that idea. Have them fight together. As the Normandy pulls away, he sees Harbinger getting ready for an attack. He gasps, and the hangar door closes shut. He’s sitting in a hospital room beside a bed. It’s silent except for the machines’ beeping and hissing. He places his hand on hers, squeezes gently, “Come back to me.” Something happens, a twitch in her hand. She’s squeezing back. His dark depths find her lavender ones, “Mina…” She squeezes his hand again, and he calls for the nurse. She’s here. She’s alive. Dancing is a little awkward when you’re learning how to walk properly again, but he’s got his best friend who he’s always been in love with in his arms. She blushes softly after stepping on his foot once or twice. He presses a kiss to her cheek, nudging his feet under hers. She laughs and the memory of two young kids dancing in the soft light of their shared room at Brain Camp flits through his mind. It’s fitting how its always been her, will always be her. Adamina wraps her arms around Kaidan’s shoulders and pulls his forehead to touch hers. They share a kiss and a long life together.

#f!shenko #kaidan X shepard #Adamina Shepard #Kaidan freaking alenko #mentions of #Katherine Brianne #Alexander Michael

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elevanetheirin · 7 years ago

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What Happens to Alistair If...

Ever wonder what happened to your Warden’s Love, Alistair after Loghain was made a Warden? I did, because quite frankly I was mad at Bioware for making him run off without an explanation from the Warden and because he just up and leaves her. The only time I’ve ever made Loghain a Warden was to complete the achievements and as a result I thought about it and wondered what would happen if Leana Mahariel went looking for Alistair, and if she in fact knew the price that was paid by a Warden before Riordan told them. This story was the result of my need to make Alistair and my Warden happy. To have a happy ending regardless of the black hearts of Bioware and their plans lol Behold, my improved Epilogue lol (at least imo)

For those of you who haven’t read it but might want to... E for Everyone, Fluffy Fluff Alistair X Warden You can also read it on A03 Here

The figure stood in the shadows of the tree line, watching the quiet village for the third week in a row. She knew he was coming, Leliana had told her he was on his way, and Leliana was always right when it came to the comings and goings of their friends. Even the ones who didn't want to be found.

Highever had been unseasonably cold the past three weeks, or was that just her heart making her feel that way? They had to talk, she wasn't sure how she was going to get Alistair to listen but she had to try. They'd both been miserable since that horrible day. Leliana was good at finding those things out as well. So, she stood sentinel over the village, watching and waiting, barely getting a glance from the villagers. She knew he was coming to Highever to do what he’d said for Duncan, a memorial.

Alistair sat in the wagon staring at his feet thinking about how much he needed a drink. The long ride in this bumpy wagon with nothing but his thoughts since the farmer wasn't much for chatting. He seemed to drink a lot these days. Ever since the Landsmeet. The woman he thought loved him had betrayed him. Letting that slimy Loghain live. LIVE as a Grey Warden no less. Where was the honor in that? Where was Duncan and Cailen's justice? His jaw ached before he realized he was doing it again. Clenching his teeth and fists. He wanted to hit something, KILL something. Anything to make the thoughts go away. A drink was exactly what he needed, it'd been 2 days since he had one and the memories were creeping back in. Then he sighed and choked back tears, "how could she have done that then beg me to stay?" he thought.

He'd sworn on Duncan's life he wouldn't drink until his task was done but the promise was proving harder than he thought to keep. Andraste's ashes! When the wagon stopped he jolted back to the present, looked around and realized they were finally in Highever. He tipped the farmer 2 sovereigns and jumped out.

"Oh yeah...right outside the tavern. That's perfect", he thought as he gathered his things and headed inside. It was only about noon but he just had to get her out of his mind and drinking was the only way he knew how, it was the only thing that worked, at least until he was so drunk he had no idea what he was saying. He'd already been told he talks about her non-stop when about 15 ales in, but who cares at that point?

She was in shadow again, this time inside the tavern. She saw him hop out of the wagon and had recognized him the moment the wagon pulled into town. She had slipped into the tavern before he'd shaken himself from his daydream, or was it a waking nightmare? Her heart sank a little more. She desperately needed to explain to him what really happened. He had gotten so upset and stormed out she couldn't tell him that she had known. She hadn't betrayed him, she just hadn't told him. She pulled the cloak's hood back up over her head, hiding her face, then slipped onto the stool next to him quietly. It was as though Alistair didn't even see her.

He was gone again in his thoughts, like he was on the wagon. She looked at him from the corner of her eye. Still so handsome, then again it had only been six months, but it had seemed like a lifetime. His dirty blonde hair needed a trim and he was in desperate need of a shave but all she could think of was how very much she still loved him. He HAD to listen. Dear Maker PLEASE let him listen to what she had to say.

Quietly and quickly Leana whispered, "He's dead Alistair. He paid for what he did at Ostagar."

Alistair jerked in his seat and stiffened. He turned to look at the woman sitting beside him she didn't return his look but he knew that shape, had held it in his arms for nearly a year.

Leana sat looking straight ahead trying to keep calm and not run out of the tavern without saying what she'd come to say.

"Give me just a moment Alistair and then I will leave you alone. I promise I won't beg you to stay or to forgive me. I understand why you can't, but please, hear me out."

"Say what you have to say and leave me to my drinking then" That was what he'd said but his heart was screaming "don't you DARE let her leave"

Leana sighed softly, then took a deep breath. "When we went to the vault in Denerim I found a journal, from a Commander of the Grey. The night before the Landsmeet, at Redcliffe Castle, I sat in bed and read through it. Not all of it but things that caught my attention. One of the entries was about how an Archdemon dies."

"So what?" Alistair barked, it sounded harsher than he had meant it to, but if she didn't leave he was going to give in and take her in his arms. Her voice sounded like she was crying but she still wasn't looking at him so he couldn't be sure, and that broke his heart all over again. Knowing she was in pain trying to tell him something that he didn't want to hear.

"When Riordan suggested making Loghain a Warden, I already knew that killing the Archdemon would kill the Warden and all I could think about was how that would save you. I didn't give a sodding damn about saving his life. I didn't do it for him, I didn't do it for the Grey Wardens. I did it for you Alistair, and even if you hate me the rest of your life I would do it again if I was given the choice. That bastard died on top of Fort Drakon. Duncan and Cailen were avenged, someone else died and I'M supposed to be the Hero. I'm no hero, I was a coward who couldn't let the man she loved die. I even sacrificed us to do it."

She stood up then and turned toward him. "I had to find you, to tell you. You needed to know that justice was done. Goodbye Alistair. I love you... Always." Leana sobbed as she started towards the door.

He sat stunned, he nearly fell off his stool. "Stupid stupid stupid! I knew I should have run back to her, I knew I should have told her I was sorry, I hadn't meant all those things I had said to her" he thought. Alistair stood up and turned towards the door just as it softly closed behind her. He bolted for the door.

Oh Maker Please let her still be there!

The sun blinded him for a moment but then he saw her, just down the road. She'd pulled back her hood and he could see her beautiful red hair and just a peek of her elven ears poking out from the strands. His breath caught in his throat as he remembered stroking that lovely hair while she slept. How he'd missed her. His heart ached, it nearly burst out of his chest towards her. As he caught up to Leana he spun her around and enfolded her in his arms.

"I was wrong, I was so very wrong. I knew I was wrong that day but refused to go back." As he said the words she collapsed against him and cried. Her big blue eyes filled with tears. Now he was completely broken. He sat right there in the road holding her in his arms. Rocking her, stroking her back "I love you, I was wrong" over and over until neither of them could cry anymore. Then they just sat there desperately holding on to the most important thing in the world. Each other.

#Alistair Theirin #Dragon Age Origins #Fanfic #Alistair X Warden #Loghain is a Warden #Epilogue

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lavalampelfchild · 7 years ago

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I Just Lost Cole...

So in my quest to experience a new worldstate I've never used for a DAI playthrough using an entirely throwaway Inquisitor, I accidentally created a character I like. Her name is Ceda, she’s an elf, and she almost always chooses the more serious/almost-aggressive options. To me she has thus far come across as practical, blunt, and emotionally disinterested in making friends. She takes her job seriously and keeps her feelings to herself. And she doesn’t agree with people just to get their approval. So, in an honest playthrough thus far, Iron Bull is the only one who’s really approved of her attitude and actions. With that in mind, I wasn’t exactly expecting her to make a lot of friends.

But I just lost Cole (after playing Champions of the Just and allying with the templars) and it blindsided me. I mean, Ceda’s cold in conversation, not very diplomatic, and she doesn’t care to beat around the bush, but I wasn’t playing her to be cruel. And yet…

I know that Cole greatly disapproves of allying with the templars, so that started us off on some rocky footing, and, as per her usual tendency, Ceda didn’t welcome him to Skyhold with open arms or positive approval dialogue choices because that’s just not how she does things. So I suspect they never really moved past that initial disapproval from Champions of the Just.

Add to that my decision in Here Lies the Abyss, which was to allow the Wardens to remain and serve the Inquisition because that’s what I genuinely prefer to do, and I decided that Ceda would feel it practical to keep experts on slaying darkspawn around in case a large group of darkspawn (like in western Orlais) needed to be dealt with. She may also have been a bit arrogant in assuming that she and the Inquisition would be able to handle the Wardens should Corypheus get a hold over them again.

Of the decision to let the Wardens remain in Orlais and join the Inquisition, Cole greatly disapproved again.

So there we have it: two doses of “greatly disapproves” and nothing much else. Ceda has not concerned herself with choosing diplomatic dialogue options, nor has she done much to go out of her way and talk to people about anything other than the Inquisition. Beyond “how are your people doing”, “what do you make of the people you work with”, and “is there anything I should know” she hasn’t been big on the chatting.

I think that those two huge disapproval moments, plus the lack of Ceda talking to Cole and choosing options in dialogue that would earn even slight approval to soften his disposition toward her, ultimately led to Cole’s leaving the Inquisition. At the end of the day, I didn’t have Ceda talk to him enough or help out NPCs in the Hinterlands enough to earn back even a bit of that lost approval. In hindsight it makes sense.

In the moment, though, I was shocked as hell because I legitimately didn’t think I was that close to the low disapproval scene for Cole.

And then the shock passed and I found myself frustrated and annoyed. Because, in my attempt to roleplay a character as accurately to what she was becoming over the course of the playthrough as possible, the game interpreted a socially cold and distant personality as morally unfeeling. And that’s just not true of Ceda. The way I’ve been envisioning and trying to play her, she believes that focusing on the Breach instead of every individual sob story they come across is the best strategy for restoring some semblance of peace to Thedas. But apparently, the game decided that she instead didn’t like helping people. So, in one sense, I have this feeling of being cheated by a game with limited and linear programming that is designed a certain way, and which favors certain paths over others. (I’m reminded of the Paragon v. Renegade paths in Mass Effect) This is not the first time BioWare has done this, (nor will it be the last, I suspect) and it annoys me now as much as it did before.

But on the other hand, a surprisingly fantastic character moment just emerged from this, and there seems to be an interesting opportunity for growth and development here. For both Cole and Ceda. On Cole’s part, from a narrative perspective, he greatly misinterpreted Ceda’s character in this moment because she has not thus far projected any of the warmth that he normally tries to when helping people; she hasn’t given herself or her efforts to compassion toward individuals as Cole would have preferred, and instead directed her focus and actions to more of a “larger picture” plan by making calls that she knew not many people would like, but that she felt were best for all involved.

Like allying with the templars to avoid fostering resentment and division amongst Inquisition members and the templars who would technically have been prisoners had she not given them equal status. Or allowing the Wardens to remain and aid the Inquisition because their talents were useful, and if they wanted to see that as an opportunity to atone, then so be it. She knows what it is to fudge up and want to fix things.

To Cole (and many others) this was opportunistic, ruthlessly pragmatic, and led him to believe that Ceda was willing to brush their crimes under the rug because she thought their usefulness outweighed the pain they’d caused others. And that made Ceda, in his eyes, the Wrong Person to be Working With.

To Ceda, those decisions were the best ways for her to help people in the long run. They allowed the Inquisition to bolster its forces, and allowed her to keep close and constant watch over other organizations that messed up and helped cause the whole mess in the first place. If accused of being ruthlessly pragmatic, she would agree and ask how that’s bad. If accused of not wanting to help people and brushing crimes under the rug, she would stiffen up and demand to know how before preparing a rebuttal.

Because despite Cole’s accusations, and despite their different approaches to the same thing - helping Thedas - Ceda was and is trying, and Cole isn’t entirely correct in his claim that she doesn’t like to help people. She doesn’t go about it the best way all the time, and she certainly could work more on compromising, but her intentions are similar to his. I haven’t decided much of her backstory (honestly I hadn’t intended to because her initial purpose was to allow me to try out a different worldstate for her playthrough) so I don’t know as much about her motivations and beliefs as I do for my other OCs, but I know that she has morals and holds to them proudly. I know that she wants to stop the Breach and doesn’t particularly care for the power that comes with leading the Inquisition, though she knows that she can and should make use of it. I also know that she’s no saint and that she is capable of stubbornness, arrogance, and - yes - ruthless pragmatism. But it’s the complex relationship between all these things that I would rather focus on instead of failing to meet the game’s black and white standards of morality.

For Cole, this could be a moment of coming face to face with the complexity and nuanced nature of mortals. Part of what frustrated me about Cole’s accusation of Ceda was that it came from a character who can literally see into the minds of others, and if that’s the case, then he should be able to see into Ceda’s mind and know that she, at the very least, isn’t a coldhearted monster who’s willing to let all the innocent people die and all the crimes go unpunished to achieve her own goals. This is a limitation of the game and programming, I understand, but I like to imagine that narratively, Cole does more thinking about the odd contradictions he sees in Ceda’s mind and actions, and that it leads him to a more nuanced view of her as an individual, and of the mortal mind/nature in general.

For Ceda’s part, this could be a moment of development because it forces her to confront and acknowledge how people see her and interpret her actions. In Cole’s case, it was negatively, and she lost a valued member of the Inquisition because of it. It wasn’t enough of a wake-up call to have her begging him to stay (I played the scene in-character for her, and she basically allowed him to go without putting up a fight because it’s not her place to force people to stay when they don’t want to; plus she doesn’t want someone there when they’re unwilling anyway) but I headcanon it as being enough to impress upon her the potential consequences of miscommunication and a lack of transparency on her part when it comes to her own goals for the Inquisition and her principles regarding the decisions she has to make.

I also think that it could get her to start thinking more about her own place in the Inquisition and what it would take to actually open herself more to dissenting opinions and learn to compromise a bit. Especially if it remains a part of her narrative canon that Cole made her forget and she’s not entirely sure where these thoughts are coming from, only that there’s some vaguely distressed and perplexed part of her mind that won’t let up about it.

Ultimately, I think I’m going to roll with this loss for the rest of the playthrough, and see what happens. It might be that Ceda will feel compelled to act a bit more diplomatically and with more concern for how others respond to her actions in the future, I don’t know. But regardless I’m too attached to the potential story that could go along with this unexpected development to go back and meta-game it away.

Besides, I liked how the scene concluded with Cullen basically coming out to say, “You okay, boss?” as Ceda had some trouble maintaining composure after Cole made her forget. I thought it was sweet of Cullen, and also the timing was perfect because Ceda had just finished berating him for not telling her about his decision to stop using lyrium (because she saw that as potentially compromising the Inquisition’s forces if the withdrawal got too bad), and declaring that she didn’t care what decision he made so long as he did his job. I headcanon that she also declared that Cullen would be deferring to her judgment as well as Cassandra’s because she doesn’t trust Cassandra to remain unbiased when assessing Cullen’s condition. So, basically, this was a nice little turnabout moment that I enjoyed. Kill her with kindness, Cullen! (Say that ten times fast.)

#dragon age inquisition #cole #lavellan #ceda #inquisitor lavellan #my writing

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annakie · 8 years ago

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Thoughts on Andromeda, Part Nine

I’m going to start these with a non-spoilery screenshot I like from here on out.

When last we left Annwyl, she’d been dodging pools of acid and a relationship with a scoundrel. Let’s help out Cora, Jaal and Vetra!

Am I missing something or is it almost impossible to buy/sell mass quantities of items on PC without clicking a bajillion times? I gave up early. Surely I’m going to need 3600 copper someday, right? Of course, I ended up with over 150k credits, so... not like selling mass quantities of minerals was needed either.

I was ready for a break from Kadara after setting Reyes up as the boss and getting our colony settled, so it was time to start helping others. The Asari were top priority, and so Cora, Peebee and I set off to help our blue friends. Yeah, I brought Peebee along just because I knew she wouldn’t love going and I thought it’d be interesting. She had a few interesting things to say, but no big differences, I don’t think.

Remember way back when I got to the Nexus and was like “Man I was hoping for a dark, creepy place to explore!” Well, I found it. Here we go, a whole long, dark, creepy, and sad mission. I ended up doing this mission late at night and regretting it pretty quickly, but pushed through anyway, haha.

I forgot to take a lot of screenshots early on, but I enjoyed seeing details like what the Asari brought along with them. It was a little hard to read some of the stories here,

I was glad that the ending really gave Cora a time to shine. I really enjoyed the ending to this quest, the visuals were stunning. I ended up forcing Cora’s Asari inspiration lady to retire, because Annwyl would definitely be all about telling the truth and having integrity whenever possible. I enjoyed the quandary here, and am looking forward to making the other choice next time.

So this is as good as any to talk about Cora. I hate it say it, but she was by far the least utilized character for me. I didn’t dislike her, and I feel like I didn’t give her a fair enough shake. I think, like for a lot of people, her rah-rah-look-at-me-I’m-practically-an-Asari attitude started to grate on me a little. I really don’t want to put the human squadmates down -- I’ve had more than enough of seeing that with Ash, Kaidan, Miranda and Jacob, thanks, but I felt like Bioware toed the line of making her almost a weeaboo sometimes. I want to go back and use her more next time and hopefully push away some of those conceptions and grow to love Cora more. I feel like... we only really got to see her either being (rightfully) upset about being passed over for Pathfinder or breathlessly praising the Asari. I hope I missed some stuff.

I will say, though, I did bring her along with Jaal in the Nomad for a short time and she grew on me a lot then. Jaal <3s both of the human sqaddies so much, and I loved Jaal and Cora’s sibling-like banter and admiration for each other a lot.

So, the quest to find the Architect on Eos kept bugging out on me, though I didn’t know it, the first time. I could advance it a little, then it’d get stuck. Eventually, after a game-freezing bug, I got it to work properly, and killed my first Architect. These fights were really amazing, and a great way for the game to force you to think fast and critically with what you’re doing, and not just hang out in one spot flinging spells. Turns out that I had tried what turned out to be the most difficult one, Voeld, first. So once I started the fight on Eos I was able to trounce this guy, then went right back to Voeld pretty quick and trounced that one, too, then again on Kadara.

That’s also when I began to suspect there was a banter bug, because although after many long conversations with Vetra and Drack on Kadara, they eventually grew silent. I started getting nervous when I brought Liam and Drack along to the Eos architect, then Liam and Jaal to Voeld, and went to finish up Kadara quests + architect with Peebee and Drack and... dead silence all the way through. Shit.

This screenshot from Jaal’s loyalty quest was just begging to be posted. I shoulda killed the UI though.

Jaal’s loyalty quest was fantastic. It gave so much more insight in the Angara and their personal relationships. I chose not to shoot. Bringing Liam along was a great decision, too. The way Liam supported Jaal was fantastic, and I really felt like I had three people who cared deeply for each other caring for each other along this mission. The visuals were also fantastic. Just... again huge applause to Jaal’s VA.

Look, I love Jaal, and when I re-start the game, I’m romancing him. I am saving the rest of the Liam stuff for one big post here soon, but as much as I love Liam (a lot), and he will always be Annwyl’s canon romance, I am super looking forward to also seeing Jaal’s romance content.

Not a euphemism. Well... not intentional... haha. :)

Look, I originally loved the Angaran Commando Armor. When it looked like this.

But once I got into this tier of armor there was just way too much going on, I started resenting the boobflaps (even though the coloring on them was pretty) and I felt like with all the pockets and bulbs and general material of armor, like the Stay-Puft Marshmellow pathfinder.

But for my tech-power heavy Pathfinder... it was by far the best armor for her. I just wish I could have visually kept the earlier version of the armor.

Anyway...

Holy crap, the moon planet was FUN. SO MUCH FUN. And gorgeous. Although driving around the nomad never felt like the chore that the Mako sometimes did in ME1, on here it was a whole other scale of fun.

Since I was on the moon, I found my way to Vetra’s loyalty mission. Once again, the loyalty missions were where things really shine. This quest not only had great stakes for Sid and Vetra, but also for a whole group of people. The only annoyance is when controlling the camera, idk if it was my mouse or what, but it was really difficult to move just a teensy bit. The DPI or something seemed to shoot way up so even a millimeter of movement was like several inches on the screen.

Vetra and Sid’s relationship is fantastic, and a dynamic we haven’t seen much of in the ME games before. The games seem kind of light on Moms, and though Vetra isn’t really a mom, she’s close. I love the relationship between these two.

Vetra, I think was my second least used character, which is a shame. She’s well layered. I’m going to work on using her more next playthrough also. Between Liam being my LI so I wanted him around a lot, and both Drack and Jaal seemed to both have a lot of places where it just made more sense to bring them along -- both Voeld and Havarl for Jaal, then Kadara and Elaadan for Drack, so I went way heavier on the male companions this first round. Something I’m going to fix.

Anyway... I honestly feel like Vetra and Liam’s dislike for each other is genuinely interesting. I LIKE that not everyone likes each other in this group. Liam and Vetra come from very different worlds. Hers is criminal and chaotic, his is civility and order. I think that Liam has a hard time seeing Vetra’s POV with Sid, and instead has often seen what the aftermath of crime and chaos does to a society, thus he judges her harder. I’m not saying he’s right, but I see his POV. I also see Vetra’s, thinking Liam is judgmental, naive and has “cop eyes”. I appreciate that they often try to get along, and even help each other out and I think by the end have a grudging respect and like each other.

But yeah, though I mostly only saw Vetra’s dialog with Drack, Liam and some with Peebee (I love their sisterly relationship) I felt like seeing her with Liam gave the most insight into her character.

I could also picture Annwyl going between the two begging them to please get along, and it only nominally working.

ANYWAY I love Vetra and someday I’mma romance her.

Not long after getting out of here, I was sure I had a banter bug, researched it online and saw yep, it was a thing. So I stopped playing for over a week.

Since I had a gaming con to go to that next weekend I didn’t miss out on TOO much playtime, but man I was ready to get back into the game once the patch dropped on Thursday.

We’ll pick back up there next post.

#mass effect #andromeda #mass effect andromeda #bioware #annakie's mass effect stuff

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