#been thinking about them a lot. unsurpisingly.

[tenpint]

hand study ft. brit + mallick

[veryfancydoilies]

My Victoria Byng Headcanons (requested by Anonymous)

I am so sorry I took so long but they’re finally here! I really hope everyone likes them. If you want me to write headcanons for another character, you can but please understand they probably won’t come right away. Ideas just don’t always come to mind that easily. I’m already writing headcanons for Sally so stay tuned for that. I’m actually thinking of writing headcanons for Johnny Bolton so let me know if you want that. Anyways, enjoy and have a lovely day!

🥻Before she became a Downer, Victoria had the delusion that her mother was never imprisoned and was currently having a lovely time in India. She does speak of India from time to time and expresses the desire to visit, but thinking of it brings up painful memories. Partially at the behest of her father, she takes an huge amount of Joy to keep them away.

☎️She has lots of friends but is not particularly close to any of them. This is due to both her tendency to be a workaholic and the general shallowness of relationships between Wellies. This is the reason why she did not realize the full extent of Prudence's feelings toward her. Victoria liked Prudence a lot, believing her to be very talented but sadly, their bond was severed when Victoria told Prudence she suspected her of being a Downer. Shortly thereafter, Prudence vanished. After the events of We All Fall Down, I think Victoria would be very sad to hear of Prudence's demise. She's another name in the list of people whose lives were destroyed by Joy and Vicky holds a lot of guilt. Her role in Prudence's death makes it even sadder. I think they would have been good friends or even lovers.

📦Her home used to have artwork, books and memorabilia from India. She loved them but when she looked at them, they made her sad to the point where she started crying. She told her father about this and he gave her tea laced with Joy. He then hired someone to come into her home and take all of the things related to India.

📚Victoria sometimes hosts book club and women's club meetings at her home. Uncle Jack's three books about the war were the subject of some of the meetings. Looking back at this, Downer!Victoria, being a lover of history, would disparage the books as being terribly written and dull.

🤬Unlike the other potty-mouthed protagonists of We Happy Few, Victoria very rarely swears. Both of her parents, especially her aristocratic mother, made it a priority to install grace and elegance in their daughter. It takes an extreme amount of stress (and anger) to make Victoria swear as seen in the cutscene when Ollie forces her off Joy. Also, if Downer!Victoria ever swore, she would hear her mother curtly admonishing her so she refrains from it.

🪅Victoria's favorite Uncle Jack segments are Funny Old Customs and Famous Britons since she likes history albiet the sanitized version of history shown to Wellies. So unsurpisingly it was her idea to bring the piñata on the day Arthur went Downer. But of course since everyone is on Joy and have no idea they're just watching reruns, many many other piñatas have probably been smashed before the one we saw.

🧳In her post-Wellington Wells, I like to think that Vicky got involved in politics in some way or another. She of course has many regrets but her leadership skills would not fade. Also, she was probably a key witness of what happened in Wellington Wells and has written books and given interviews about it. Most survivors prefer to live as if it never happened.

@we-joyless-few @sea-side-scribbles @joyful-downer

[reidyoulikeabook]

Invisible String

Ship: Fem! Reader x Spencer Reid

Warnings: None, this is just fluff.

Word count: 3.2k

Summary: You and Spencer Reid don’t know it, but you’ve almost met quite a few times. What happens when you do?

A/N: This is potentially a bit on the wrong side of the cheesy line, but I was listening to invisible string by Taylor Swift and couldn’t get this idea out of my head. Pls bare in mind I’m from the UK and my only understanding of the US college system is from Google searches, so pls be forgiving of any misunderstandings about that.

November 6th, 2007

Dr. Spencer Reid. As you sat, thumbing through the article he’d written about the formation of ionic compounds in a chemical whose name you could not for the life of you spell or pronounce, you couldn’t help but resent the man.

Sure, the paper was very well-written and as cohesive as possible given the complex subject matter. But Dr. Spencer Reid, whoever he was, was the current source of your resentment at selecting chemistry to make up your science credit. Highlighting the name of a substance you’d have to look up later, you sighed. It was getting late but you had to hand in a critical summary of the paper on Friday.

It didn’t help that Dr. Reid was: a) a triple doctorate holder by the age of 22, or b) that your chemistry lecturer was none other than his old chemistry lecturer from Caltech and practically glowed with pride whenever he got to bring him up.

You chew on the end of your pen, having now distracted yourself from the notes. Not that you were particularly focused anyway.

In another life, maybe you’d have been a budding chemist who could describe an ionic lattice off rote. In this one, however, you’d just have to settle for slogging through the list of chemical processes and hoping you understood it well enough to please Dr. Reid’s biggest fan.

***

April 16th, 2008

Spencer hated flaking on commitments. It caused him a great deal of anxiety, the feeling of disappointing someone. He didn’t have much choice in this circumstance though.

Diana had taken ill over the last weekend. Nothing serious, some stomach bug or other. She’d become severely dehydated though, and had been hospitalised as a precautionary measure. Truth be told, he might not have gone if she hadn’t caught him on the phone. He was already feeling guilty for not having visited since Christmas. He wrote her letters everyday, yet still felt like he was neglecting his duties as a son. Rubbing his hands over his face, he lets out a deep sigh. Then takes out his laptop, to send another email.

Dear. Dr Abraham

I sincerely apologise again for my last minute cancellation. Excluding any unforeseen circumstances, myself and SSA Hotchner will be available to present the lecture on May 12th.

Yours sincerely,

Dr. Spencer Reid.

***

May 12th, 2008

Considering this was your third year on campus, you sure were bad at finding your way around. In your defence, they were doing maintenance in one of the main buildings, meaning that lectures got shuffled around and relocated. You probably had a higher change of attending the right lecture by accident than on purpose.

It doesn’t help that you’re running a little late this morning. You rush into Room 203. A lot of the seats are taken, you have to meander your way past quite a few people until you end up sat almost directly in the middle. Only moments before the lecture starts.

“I’m SSA Hotchner, and this is SSA Reid. We’re members of the BAU which is based at FBI quarters in Quantico. Today, we’ll be talking to you about profiling.”

This is not your forensic linguistics lecture.

Panic hits you, hot in your gut. Scanning the room anxiously, you suddenly become conscious that you’re drawing attention to yourself when you feel the eyes of the man who is not SSA Hotchner on you. Fuck.

There’s no way for you to escape now, not without disturbing half the lecture hall.

So you sit back in your seat, resigning yourself to sit awkwardly in the lecture you’re not supposed to be in and hoping nobody notices.

But then, it’s really interesting, actually. The work that Dr. Reid does sounds similar to work you’ve done in forensic linguistics, analysing patterns of speech and minor phrase formations that can give things away about the perpetrator. By the end of the seminar, you’re sat leaning forward. Enraptured by almost every word coming out of their mouths.

It seems to be the general mood: everyone is enamoured. People are clammering to speak to them at the end. After a brief inner battle, myou decide that you should talk to them too.

What’s the harm?

You’ve decided that you’ll speak to Dr. Reid, since he seems to share more of a field focus. However, as you’re heading down, you spot him. Dr Adams, your chemistry lecturer from last year. Oh shit, it’s that Dr. Reid.

Speaking to SSA Hotchner will just have to do instead.

----

“I’ve been majoring in forensic linguistics and criminal psychology,” You tell him, “Do you think ... I mean, I know it’s a pretty exclusive team to get on to. But is that the kind of thing that could maybe get me there one day?”

Hotchner nods, “Forensic linguistics is something that comes in very useful in the investigative aspects of cases. The FBI is always looking for new angles and perspectives, those are both good subjects to study if you were thinking of signing up to the academy.”

"Thank you, Agent Hotchner,” You say, suddenly a little bashful as you notice the queue of people lingering behind you, “That was a really interesting lecture. It’s definitely something I’ll think about.”

“You should talk to Dr. Reid if you have a particular interest in the linguistic aspect of profiling. He’s more specialised in that area than I am. I’m sure he’d be more than happy to discuss any research you’re conducting at the moment and suggest materials that might be helpful in furthering your understanding of the area.”

“Thank you,” You smile, and he nods at you again.

Stepping away from Agent Hotchner, you look to your right. Dr. Reid is still engaged deeply in conversation with Dr. Adams. You glance at your watch. There was time before your next class, you supposed, so you could wait. It couldn’t hurt to find out more, could it? It wasn‘t like you were getting your hopes up or anything.

It’s then that you feel a pair of arms around your waist, a familiar scent of cologne.

“Hey!” You whip around to see your boyfriend, grinning widely.

“Hey,” You reply, “How’d you find me?”

“I was walking past when I saw you talking to that FBI agent. Seriously, FBI?” He asks, with a disapproving quirk of his eyebrow, “You want to grab a coffee before Psych?”

You want to say no. But he’s got his hand on the small of your back, leading  you out of the room before you even get a chance to reply. You glance back over your shoulder, making eye contact with Dr. Reid for all of two seconds before you’re swept away.

“Seriously though babe, FBI?”

Unsurpisingly, you don’t mention your potential change in career path to him.

***

March 8th, 2009

“Come in,” Hotch calls. He looks up from the paperwork on his desk to see Spencer entering the room, clutching a report in his hand.

“That last case we were on. I was doing some more research, just for future reference about linguistic patterns. Have you read this?” He asks, sliding a copy of your paper across the desk.

Hotch gives it a cursary look over, nodding, “Yes. It’s interesting. She’s signed up as an NAT. I believe I actually spoke to her at one of our lectures last year.”

"Her work is really impressive for somebody whose only studied this at a master level.”

Hotch almost smiles, “Yes. That’s exactly why I’ve recommended to the bureau that she signs up for profiling classes. Her work shows a lot of promise. They’re sending over a copy of her completed thesis, if you’d like to read it.”

“Yeah, I’d like that, thank you,” Spencer says, struggling to conceal the smile playing on the corner of his lips.

“I’ll email it to you as soon as I receive it.”

Spencer nods, smiling properly to himself as he leaves the room. It wasn’t unusual, exactly, for him to share new research that was relevant to cases. It was important that they all kept themselves fresh and acquainted with new theories about the field. Hotch, however, didn’t miss the excited way Spencer had presented it to him. Talking about how impressive you were, as if to subtly hint. He thinks it’s quite typical, actually, that Spencer could take such an interest in someone he only knew via an essay.

Although Spencer’s response does get Hotch to send a follow-up email, inquiring about whether you’d agreed to the classes. If Spencer was this impressed with your work, it must be good.

***

June 1st, 2009

The Metro that morning is packed. It doesn’t help that you’ve not been living here long, and don’t exactly know the route from your flat to the station off by heart yet.

You'd also had to make a detour to the post office. Your, firmly ex, boyfriend had mailed over the last of your things. Really, it was good riddance. His hounding you about your choice in job had only worsened. The relationship had been hanging on by a thread long before you’d moved away last month. You were more than a little grateful that it was finally over, that you could draw a line under it all and focus on your career.

Unfortunately, that hadn’t stopped you having a little cry to yourself on the way over.

Rushing, you make it onto the Metro just as the doors are about to close, falling against the railing on the left side. You grip onto it for dear life.

On the other side of the carriage, Spencer notices someone hurrying for the train. He had been buried deep in the paper he's reading, but the bustle had pulled his attention. Your back is to him, and there’s a scarf at your feet. He wants to say something, to try and get your attention, but he can’t from where he is.

“Miss, I think you’ve dropped something,” The woman you’re standing in front of says, gesturing to the scarf pooled at your feet.

You meet her eyes, sniffling slightly, “Thank you.”

Spencer watches as you pick it up, back still to him. Crisis averted, he turns his attention back to what he's reading: the published copy of your thesis Hotch had emailed him last week.

***

September 2nd, 2009

"This is SSA ____, the newest member of our team. She’s recently graduated from the academy and has an excellent knowledge of linguistics that the bureau feels will be a great advantage to this team. She’s had her induction and now will be joining the team on a probationary basis. She’ll be spending a little time with each of you in between cases to make sure she forms well-rounded knowledge of all aspects of what we do.”

It’s a little overwhelming, having everybody’s eyes on you.

“It’s so nice to meet you,” Emily is the first over, offering her hand for you to shake.

“You too, it’s really nice to meet all of you,” You say, shaking hands in turn with her, Morgan, Rossi, J.J, and Garcia.

“Hi,” Spencer calls from behind you.

You turn around to face him. You remember what Hotch had mentioned to you about him being a bit of a germaphobe, so you keep your hand by your side.

“Hi,” You say, “Dr. Reid, right?”

“You can call me Spencer,” He says, a little bashful, “I read your thesis, the study about you did about the construction of passive clauses as an indicator of guilt in adolescent offenders. It was fascinating.”

You feel yourself getting a little warm under his gaze, “Thank you. I'm surprised you’re even aware it existed.”

Hotch interrupts then, “Reid, do you want to sit with ____ while she goes over the case file? It’d be useful if you could go over how you’d go about constructing a linguistic profile.”

That’s how you end up spending much of your first day: with Spencer, huddled up over case files as he explains his profile-building process to you. Spencer’s an incredible teacher, you think. He explains his thought process without ever being condescending, leaving little gaps for you to answer.

You’re incredible, Spencer thinks. You seem to grasp exactly what he’s saying, filling in the gaps based on the clues that are actually in front of you, not letting yourself be guided too much by bias.

***

October 29th, 2009

Spencer loves everyone at the BAU. They’re all the family he never had, and he has relatively good friendships with all of them. Just, they aren’t quite the same as they are with you.

He struggles to put his finger on it, exactly. It’s a unique relationship. He shares very familial bonds with a lot of them: he and Morgan are brotherly, Rossi is fatherly, Garcia’s somewhat like an overexcited little sister.

The friendship he has with you is special. You always listen to him, even as he rambles on about inane things that anybody else would tell him to shut up about. In fact, sometimes about the exact things that they do tell him to shut up about. Just last week, he was rambling on about Star Trek when Morgan told him, not altogether unkindly, to “give it a rest, kid.”

“What was that you were saying?” You’d asked, sidling up to him, “I’ve never watched Star Trek but I thought the quote was beam me up Scotty.”

He’d looked at you, considering you for a moment, “You don’t have to-”

“I know. I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t want to know Spence. You think I’d ask for a 15 minute lecture on Star Trek if I wasn’t interested in it?”

A warm feeling flooded his chest. The look on your face was so genuine, and you’d perched on the edge of his desk as he gesticulated, getting deep into the lore and how the misconception had come about. He still didn’t pinpoint exactly what it was, until he got to the end of his spiel. And then you asked him a question. You asked him a question to make sure you understood what he was talking about. You were listening the whole time, and you genuinely cared about the point he was making.

It's then that he realises, it was hard to pinpoint because it wasn’t friendship. He likes you. Shit.

***

November 2nd, 2009

You like everybody at the BAU. They’re all quite patient with you, really, happy to walk you through how they do things. Morgan’s taught you quite a bit about the tactical side of things already, and Rossi has been working with you on your interrogation techniques. Emily’s generally just a great mentor, always happy to listen and support however she can. She’s more experienced, but still relatively new to the team too, so you feel like there’s a certain understanding between you.

However, you’d definitely be lying if you said the person you hadn’t learnt the most from, or spent the most time with, was Spencer.

It hadn’t gone unnoticed by the rest of the team, either. You seemed to gravitate towards one another, forever sitting side-by-side on the plane. Sharing a line of thinking that usually led to devolved rambling, and scribbling, until you came up with something coherent.

It isn’t until November 2nd that you realise you have feelings for him.

You’re sitting at your desk, filling out a case report that Emily had promised to go over with you before she left for lunch.

“Hey,” Spencer’s familiar soothing voice comes, as he sidles up to you, “I got you something.”

Looking up, you notice the coffee cup in his right hand, “You are my caffeine lifesaver.”

He hands it to you, smiling a little nervously, “It’s actually not that.”

“Oh?”

His other hand is tucked behind his back, and he pulls it foward towards you, brandishing a red sweatshirt.

“I know you uh, left your red sweater behind at the hotel on the last case. And I know it was your favourite one, and I was shopping yesterday and I saw this and...” He trails off, embarassed, “It’s not the exact same, but it’s the same kind. I just thought you might like it.”

You swallow, hard, “Spencer that’s so sweet. C-Can I hug you?”

He nods. Standing up from your desk, you wrap your arms around his frame.

“That was so thoughtful.”

He squeezes you a little, really leaning into the hug, his face pressing against your shoulder. His tousled hair tickles your nose a little and you smile, clinging onto him, relishing in the feeling of safety and warmth.

It hits you then. When you realise you don’t want to let go. When you realise he makes you feel fuzzy. Loved. Cared for in a way you haven’t felt in a long time. Eventually, you have to let him go, and it’s in a daze that you return to your desk. You’re so concentrated on your overwhelming realisation, you don’t realise how reluctant he is to let you leave his embrace.

***

December 22nd, 2009

Driving Spencer home from the office was really just an excuse to get some time alone with him. You’d said something about the Metro being busy, one of the services being cancelled. He hadn’t factchecked you on that.

The BAU had tentative plans for boxing day, with the caveat being that no emergent cases arrived in the meantime. It was only really four days you wouldn’t see him, but that was longer than you’d ever gone without seeing him in all the time you’d known him. You worked together everyday, and it was unusual for you to go a full weekend without seeing each other. Recently, you’d got into the habit of going out for Sunday brunch together.

Pulling up outside his house, you hear him sigh.

“I know it’s only four days, but I’ll miss you.”

Smiling, you turn to him, “I’ll miss you too.” 

Something in you changes then. He’s looking at you. You may be relatively new to profiling but you can see something behind his eyes, feel the charge of unsaid words electrifying the air.

“Can I hug you?” He asks.

“You can always hug me,” You reply, undoing your seatbelt and opening your arms for him.

He embraces you the way he always has: tightly. Like he doesn’t want to let go, couldn’t imagine ever letting you go. His face nuzzles to the crook of your neck, and then you feel his thumb brush your chin. Tilting your head down.

You exchange a look. His eyes flicker from your eyes, to your lips, and back. You nod your head, just slightly.

He kisses you then. Tender. You melt into one another, lips moving quickly as you drink one another in. Kissing each other breathless, your fingers intertwine in his hair and his hand comes up to cup your cheek. Nothing has ever felt so right.

***

June 10th, 2011

Neither of you have ever really believed in fate. It’s hard to - especially in your line of work - to want to interpret the workings of the universe as deliberate. Maybe you’d think a little differently though, if you knew about all the near-misses. All the times you could have met. But fate knew better. She waited until you were ready.

And as you exchange vows, promising each other your forever, you both know you couldn’t possibly deny that this was meant to be.

------

Taglists: @takeyourleap-of-faith @sassiest-politician

(let me know if you would like to be added to/removed from this list!)

[jean-does-not-have-a-horseface]

Only Time Makes It Human 3

Part 1 | Part 2

A/N: hi and sorry for the long wait, I had to squish my brain real hard to get this chapter out, but I hope you like it, I decided a chapter about growth wasn't enough and y'all gave me an idea for angst so I just splashed it there and we'll delve into it more on the next chapter. 10/10 the idea works well enough for me to bring Levi and reader together even more. So don't call me out on being random. This is raw, un fucking edited, I'll edit later 💗

Pairing: Levi/ Reader

Tags: modern au, college au

Warnings: mentions of blood

Special kudos if you figure out why I used this gif ;)

The problem with your feet being numb in the morning when you woke up wasn't supposed to phase you as much as it currently did, but the weathering cold that had barged its way to your room silently begged to have you feel something other than the everlasting whirlpool of regret.

Which was -unsurpisingly- something you had been spiraling into a lot lately.

Your ringtone -or rather the caller that had caused it to go off- nontheless remained mercilessly unforgiving to your current condition. The brute vibrations that accompanied your once favorite song ripped through the air and bounced on every wall inside your room before it wooshed inside your eardrums.

You fucking finally had to change that ringtone, you thought.

Your feet, moist and heavy as they buzzed with the aftermath of the coma-like sleep you had just gone through, struggled to wiggle from underneath the comfort of your blankets. Your hands instinctively rubbed the underside of your nose as you sniffled all the cold of the room around you. Throwing the blanket off of you, you groaned at the non stop ringing of your phone.

The few steps to your desk felt like an eternity of having to walk with a badgy weight on your feet, but the faint feeling in your body didnt come to an halt even after you picked the device in your hands. Your eyes couldn’t really adjust well to make out the ID of the caller, of course, sleep hadn't rubbed off your eye lids yet, but still you slid the emerald button to acceptance with no resistance.

“Hey” you sleepingly moaned.

“Hellooo! (Y/n)!” Hange called enthusiastically for the other line, her joyous voice piercing your eardrums “Where are you booo?”

“I just woke up why?” you yanwed.

Pacing your eyes around your room you noticed the dull daylight creeping in through your blinds, signaling the gloom of another potentially snowy day for Trost. You blinked as you took notice of the few articles of soon to reside in the laundry bin clothing as well as the dress that hung from your closet door.

And then, it all snapped.

“Oh. shit!”

Anxiety rushed through you like a bullet to the gut, gushing numbness and waves of cold sweat from the point of impact. Forcefully, you ripped your phone off your ear and double tapped at screen to make it light up. The date read December 25, and below it, laid numerous notifications of your alarm and even a pop up reminder from last night to not forget the food you had to take with you.

Thinking back to that, your head started spinning like crazy, the familiar, yet bizarre feeling of your stomach dropping overtaking you. You hadn't cooked, rather, you had spent all night drinking and sulking on your own, cursing yourself for all your choices up to date.

"Yes, oh shit!” Hnge laughed “Oh! You forgot?”

"Hangeeee stop screaming oh my god no I didn't forget, I'm on my way okay?"

A little yelp came out of your mouth as the cable of your charger prevented you from taking another step closer to your bedroom door; letting out a curse under your breath though you quickly unplugged your phone, and rushed over the mess of your room and out to your living room.

"But you said you just woke up."

"Ahhh," you scratched your head, feeling your loose t-shirt sliding down your shoulder "no!" You said, then in a sterner voice you repeated "No! I uhm, I was just-"

Your poor excuse to communicate after having just woken up didn't startled Hange. If anything, she seemed to find it amusing because she burst into joyous, bubbling laughter at the sound of your despair. And you couldn't blame her for it; were you under any other circumstance you would be laughing with yourself as well.

"It's fine. Erwin and I are making a cake for shorty so if you want to cook here you have plenty of time yet. I'm going to say it though, we could really use your pastry skill."

You let out a sigh as you took your phone off your ear and pressed on the speaker icon. Your hands worked fast to grip onto the hem of your shirt and then, even faster, they managed to pull it off of you in shift movements.

"I'm just going to have a shower, dress up and I'll be on my way. It shouldn't take more than 30 minutes."

Hange exhaled in utter relief through the phone and you could practically feel her sheepish smile as Erwin shouted a big fat 'thank you' from the depths of his kitchen. Bringing out a hand to grap your shower cap -the only shower product you loathed using- you ripped the cap off its place on your cabinet and messily shoved all of your hair in it in rushed movements.

"Got any questions before I hit the shower Hange?"

"Please ask her" Erwin was heard and you cocked your head to the side at the sound.

"No Erwiin, we got it under control okay?"

"No we don't."

Shaking your head to prevent yourself from zoning out, you clicked your tongue before opening your mouth to address your two friends. Asking as to what they were referring to was easy, although it was obvious that Hange felt confident in succeeding in the task Erwin was referring to. Knowing Hange though, you thought you could guess perhaps what exactly was going on.

"Please don't mix food coloring with spinach juice to make the cake green like two years ago."

Erwin's laughter was pretty much evident through the other line as Hange went on blubbering about how she wasn't going to do it again giving extreme emphasis as to why she couldn't understand the reason it tasted bad in the first place but would go with what you said nevertheless. At that point Erwin was laughing hysterically, telling you how Hange was once again, indeed, thinking about it and the sound of his laughter grew even louder than Hange's words.

"Do you have food coloring?"

"Yes Hange I have food coloring."

"Plea-pleaee bring some. Dammit Erwin what's gotten into you- gotta go (y/n) see you in a while."

The beeping sound from the other line left you little to no time to properly reply to your friends with a much wanted greeting, though, you didn't think much of it. You were going to spend the whole day with them, so getting upset over not getting the chance to say goodbye over the phone wasn't something that should have caused guilt to spurt in you.

But surely, this wasn't the only cause of your overly bubbling guilt. The actual cause of the knot in your gut laid to the fact that within the time span of two weeks you had managed to to drag Levi and yourself into a rather steep rabbit hole. There was going to be a serious impact of your relationship with your friends had the two of you made it known to them; everyone would scold you -and they'd be right at that- and maybe this time they'd pick sides as to what wrong or not. And you didn't want that.

Although you secretly wished everyone went with Levi. Or at least you had come to the conclusion that that was what you deserved.

You had been feeling bothered and repulsed by what had caused you to make out with him that night, given the fact that you had been the one that initiated the kiss. And just as much, you had been feeling furious over Levi allowing this to ever happen. But looking back at it now, you couldn't say you regretted getting close to him even in such way. And that was probably the most infuriating thing of all.

Nevertheless, there was also the fact that you would be seeing Levi today and frankly you didn't know what to do with that. Should you act like everything was fine? Should you simply ignore him? Was Petra going to be with him?

Speaking of Petra it would be best if you straight up let her know of what had happened. Acting shady with another woman's man behind her back was outrageous for anyone to do and you hated being in that position like the next person.

Your stomach twisted dangerously at your spiraling thoughts, but you chose to ignore the tight knot, attributing the loud growl you had heard to one caused by your excessive hunger.

Perhaps, your shower was going to help you sort out your thoughts and intentions.

With a twist of your wrist the water started sprinting out of the tap in your shower. Your eyes were fixated on your phone, your thumb roaming through Spotify in hopes to find the perfect song to company your bath with. You simply said good for a Christmas playlist that Spotify suggested, tapping on that, a list of numerous jolly songs popped up in your screen and you simply pressed the big shuffle button before putting your head on your cabinet.

..

The walk to Erwin's house was very much and as previously expected, quiet. The sidewalks on your way were all covered in sugary white snow, decorating each different apartment complex in the non urban side of Trost along with the standard holiday decorations.

Taking a deep sigh you brought the back of your finger to the metallic button of Erwin's doorbell. Blinking rationally, you looked around at the marble front door frame of his apartment complex, your blood subtly rushing to your feet. You dragged the tip of your combat boot over the snow, curling your toes on the fuzzy material that covered the inside of the shoe.

You were beginning to become impatient as you waited on the doorframe, Erwin was taking way too long to open the door and you were practically freezing out there; the dress you wore did almost nothing to keep you warm. Despite you taking precautions by wearing a cardigan and the leather coat that you had snatched from your brother, the cold still pierced through your sheer black pantyhose, as if your efforts to stay warm were ridiculous.

The sound of footsteps was what startled you next but still your head didn't turn to the source of the buzzing noise. Your nose simply nuzzled to the scarf you had wrapped around yourself as you rubbed your face onto its warm fleece material.

"Uh, hi."

This time you could help but turn around to check who had thrown a greeting at you.

A familiar puff of ginger hair greeted you as you snuck your nose out of the edge of your scarf, two big and round hazel eyes stared right at you as you blinked rapidly back at them.

Great. Just great.

"Hey."

Petra wiggled her nostrils once to the left and then to the right, seemingly scratching the awkwardness in the atmosphere away. She blinked her eyes a few times into yours, her lips pursing together slightly as if she was coming up with a good comeback to your greeting, yet it never came.

"uhm, what's up?"

Your fingers slightly clutched the edges of your coat, crossing over your chest as you felt your jaw start clattering. Your pupils gathered at the corners of your eyes, catching small glimpses of Petra as you eyed her up and down.

She too had opted for a cardigan and a dress. A very safe choice if you were in a place to express your opinion but hers, despite being adorned with numerous tiny and dainty coral and red flowers, looked so thin and tule like and it barely covered her thighs, so much that you felt a pinch of concern run through you that you were slow to decide on whether you wanted to brush off or not.

"I'm.. good." She managed to let out, but you noticed how her lip trembled.

She was definitely shivering, if that wasn't concerning enough you didn't know what was, and she looked so frail and out of place that she could definitely beat you at it. Plus, the lack of a warm jacket struck somewhat of a nerve at you. Even feeling so much guilt over being in her presence you couldn't help but feel your motherly friend instincts wash over you; why wasn't she wearing something warmer? And why were you seconds away from taking off your jacket to offer it to her when you knew she wouldn't even accept it.

"Damn, Erwin's sure taking long, do you want my jacket?"

"Uh-"

Once again and mostly out of instinct, your finger tapped over the metallic button, covered by the edge of your sleeve. Suddenly, the familiar buzz of the intercom growled in your eardrum and you shook your head to its direction automatically.

"I'm so sorry!" Erwin said. "Come in!"

"Hey Erwin!" Petra spoke before you had a chance to say your wanted reply.

Even if you couldn't see him, you knew how shocked of an expression he was wearing.

Taking the few steps into the apartment complex's yard, you rushed to the next door and waited for the known buzz which signaled that Erwin had finally let you inside. With awkwardness spread over your face though, you pushed your lips into a thing line, holding the door back as you signaled to Petra that she should be the first to come inside.

"Thank you." She muttered.

"No prob."

You watched as Petra hesitated to push the elevator button; with a set of trembling fingers her palm rested only a few inches before the metallic button that was lit in a red arrow. With another smile you came closer to her and went to check in which floor the elevator was currently at. Whether she flinched intentionally or not, you didn't know.

"Wanna share a lift? It'll be a while till it comes down again." You offered.

"Uhm, yeah okay."

Once she responded, Petra tapped onto the elevator button with her thumb.

Petra looked at you and clung onto the edged of her cardigan once again. You took notice of how she looked a little more casual and unkept, despite being dressed on point; the lack of a jacket and her tousled naturally wavy bob betrayed an unwillingness to be present to today's event and it's was painfully obvious.

"I'd like to" Petra hesitated, "I'd like to talk to you about something."

"Oh sure, what is it about?"

"It's about Levi."

Dead silence fell as Petra didn't dare turn her gaze to your direction. The little screen over the elevator button still showed that your lift was taking long to come down as if it mocked you, but you couldn't find it in you to tap into the button once again.

"Would you like to grab some coffee with me tomorrow?"

Tomorrow.

Tomorrow.

Tomorrow.

To say that you were panicked would be an exaggeration and probably a degradation to Petra's feelings. Her breathing was heavier than your own, frankly because for her it must have been even more uncomfortable than it was for you. You couldn't blame her for that.

Nonetheless you couldn't help but be genuinely curious as to what she had wanted to tell you? It was evident that she knew something. What's slipped you was whether or not she want to bash you for your actions.

She had every right to do so.

"Yeah. Of course, uhh, tomorrow sounds good."

....

Christmas day wasn't as bad as you had expected it to be when Hange had announced to you that Levi would be coming alone with Petra.

For starters, the food was in plehtora; Erwin had cooked your jolly favorite roasted chicken, Mike and Nanaba had brought an enormous plate of their creamiest, most mouth watering souffle, Levi had made some god tasty pumpkin soup and Hange had taken actually good care of fixing a custom non alcoholic cocktail to each one of you.

All of this drool worthy deliciousness had caused, and non surprisingly at that, your body to submit in that peaceful demi slumber that tagged along with the fullness of your tummy. Frankly, it had been so long since you had enjoyed such a good meal and you didn't think you would be enjoying another one until Mikasa's birthday.

Thus, the cool evening sir that entered the room when Erwin opened the window door to the balcony, found you laying on the floor right next to the tangerine fire that danced in the fireplace. You could faintly feel Nanaba's hand scratch at the roots of your hair, her almond tipped nails slowly running in purringly mellow lines over your sculp that sent you to pure delight.

Levi's eyes danced over your form more than he'd like to admit so. Ever so slightly his pupils would travel up and down your thighs and calfs, examining the material of your sheer back pantyhose but whatever emotion overcame him wasn't the animalistic lust he had expected to feel.

He felt rather guilty. And not only for staring at your legs. For bringing himself upon the situation he was in.

It wasn't easy to think with a throbbing head but in Levi's world this poor condition was translated as a prompt to try to get out of whatever shithole he had found himself in. Maybe. Because there was also a certain part inside of him that bashed him to no end about his previous and degrading actions to both Petra's and his person, which part he completely and rationally justified.

With a quick glance at Petra, Levi brought his hand to his face to hopefully wipe any of the numbness his guilt had got him feeling. Petra seemed to enjoy herself as per usual. With her soft smiles and the mellow sway of her hair over her shoulder, she'd often reach for the hem of her white wooly cardigan to cover her shoulder while cooing into the soft material and onto the side of the couch she was seating in.

It would be hard for anyone to guess that the two of them had broken up.

She was unsurprisingly sitting as far off him as she could; the fact that they hadn't announced to anyone they had broken up because they didn't want the Christmas party at Erwin's to be ruined didn't mean she owned Levi to act like his faithful and bubbly dog.

It happened that night after he had stood her up at the movies.

Levi had gathered all of his determination and had managed to push all thoughts aside from the back of his brain, as he was despairate to ignore that feeling your make out session had brushed on him. He had walked up to Petra, all dissolved and stoic, his chest swelling with anxiety. He had stared at her with an agape mouth, he had been muttering words so honest that he felt were fatally brute and Petra had digested them all without any difficulty.

And before he knew it, he was over and done.

Petra hadn't cried, she hadn't wept, she had only answered him with a smile that she'd rather just be friends with him if things weren't going to work between them.

And to an extended it tortured the ravenette, mostly because he remembered the hurt look in her face before she had managed to hide it with her usual mellow smile.

Taking another sigh, Levi stared at Petra's hand while she played silently with the lettuce hem of her dress. Her hazel orbs were fixed on you, who laid before the fireplace like a stray cat on the tire of car during a snowy day. Levi couldnt exactly place the exact emotion behind Petra's expression, though it would be perceived by most as a saddened one. There were specs of regret gathering at the corners of her eyes, reluctance gathered at her slightly puckered lips and a hint of determination to the front tips of her eyebrows.

Maybe Petra's inner strength was something that Levi deeply admired.

Levi made no effort whatsoever to reach out to her to ask what was going on, not even to show some seemingly convern. The more he looked at Petra, the more it felt utterly wrong for him to simply stand next to her, knowing what he had do behind her back. Whether he loved her or not, it wasn't like him to be caught up in such stupid drama.

"Shorty!"

Levi looked up to an enthusiastic Hange with much tousled hair and a big grin on her face that spread from one ear to another. With another, more thorough glance, he quickly became aware of the cake in her hands; a cake covered in white frosting, decorated with soft pastel green letters that wrote a simple birthday wish to his person. He couldn't help but let out a sigh.

"For you!" Hange smiled further "Erwiiin, come light up the candles!"

Looking around the room he noticed how all of his friends' gazes were on him. Mike and Nanaba remained cuddled on the couch opposite to the one he was on, Petra was mellowy smiling at his eith her cherry lips pressed into a thin line and you were fiddling with what seating arrangement was most comfortable for you at the moment.

"We're celebrating another year where you went up in age and down in height, how delightful." Mike commented, causing laughter to spark between the small group of people around you.

After the spur of happiness died out your eyes met with Levi's, briefly and then they traveled anywhere else in the room altogether.

"Let's light up the candles!" Smiled Erwin as he flicked the small metallic button of his lighter.

"I don't want too many, shit. The last time you took my lungs out."

"Not our fault that you're old Levi!" You spoke, earning a half smile by the ravenette.

"Very old!" Hange agreed.

"Tch, I'm only turning twenty six shut your shitty mouths!"

The warm light of the fire licked each waxed strip of wick that hung from the candles, illuminating Hange's face in warm orange light. Once done with lighting up the candles, Erwin plopped himself in between Levi and Petra, crossing his hands over his knees as he shifted his bottom in the most uncomfortable seating on a couch you had ever witnessed.

You merely caught a glimpse of Hange kneeling before Levi as you dragged your gaze over to Petra, fixating it on her for the thousandth time this evening.

There only was one thing in your head that bounced between the crevices of your brain like crazy. Just one simple words that held so much behind it.

Tomorrow.

Tomorrow you were going to apologize to Petra and try to make amends. Being the despicable toxic person you had turned into didn't suit you. Owing up to your mistakes was the first step to redemption and you weren't afraid to take it.

As you fell into a spiral of thoughts and guesses about tomorrow though, you couldn't help but subtly ignore the cheerful sing alone to Levi's birthday song.

.....

"Thank you for coming!"

Petra's hair was messily swaying all over her face, falling a direct victim to the frozen December air, yet she smiled as if nothing was going on.

The park around you was covered in snow. White was primarily the color that was plastered on everything, save for the dry stems of trees that were once covered in forest green leaves.

Your peeping hot coffee did nothing to warm up your hands, despite your best wishes and in the moment you had called victim to some specs of jealousy over Petra's gloved hands as they rubbed soothing over her own coffee.

"Of course, I had been meaning to talk to you as well."

"Oh you did?" Petra spoke with her eyebrows following the little surprise that was masking her tone. "To be honest, I didn't think you'd come."

"Yeah about that-"

"Can I please go first?" Petra cut you off.

Her huge hazel eyes that blinked into yours from your left side left you little to no space to deny her wish. Thus, by taking a sigh, you pushed past the quick beating of your heart and gestured her to go first with a kind smile on your face.

"Okay oof, thanks!" Petra huffed "look. Levi and I broke up. Now I know that you'll say it doesn't concern you, and frankly it'd be ideal if it didn't, but I know it does, because Levi explained to me what happened."

At that Petra slightly paused.

Naturallye first thing that came to your mind was the need to express an apology. Although, you weren't that sure if Petra would perceive the apology as sincere, you felt like you ought to give one to her. Yet her eyes blinked into yours further as she took another turn down the path you were walking on and you wordlessly followed asuit.

"I love Levi you know," she sighed "but Levi loves you. You're not over each other and it's painfully obvious, I mean you did just collided to eachother quite literally, not giving a single care about whether you couldn't have each other or not."

A sheer red colored tint painted your cheeks at her words.

Your skin pricked you, burning up a stingingly painful path to all of the pores on your face as shame took the form of an earth shattering wave. Your heart started heaping beats, hollering into the depths of your chest and you could hear it bounce inside your eardrums as if your whole body was hollow save for the jolting organ and the echo of the sound it made was bouncing around each fleshy wall.

Petra was right and you couldn't help but accept but stand the as she was lightning you with her words.

"It hurts to see that someone that I love doesn't love me back but it hurts more to see that you two are very miserable without eachother. I really thought you were a bitch you know."

At the sound of that, you let out a startled laugh.

"Me?"

"Yeah, you just gave us looks when we'd shoe up together somewhere or you'd simply leave, but I don't like turning my back on people and judging them like that. I'm in no place to judge anyone a coping mechanism."

Petra sighed. Her fingers curled strongly onto her cup, while her left palm went to support the cup by the bottom as she angled it on her lips. She made a tiny gulping noise as she drank a sip from her latte, her nose crinkling up as the hot beverage brushed over her sensitive tongue. In turn, you sipped similarly, mimicking Petra just hoping it would serve as a sign for her to go on with her speech.

"I might be hurt, but I vouch to help you and Levi resolve what's going on and get back together."

"You do?"

"Mhm"

"Petra I, I don't know what to say you- you're a literal angel." You admit and the guilt in your stomach only growled in its awakening.

You and Levi had hurt a wonderful person. Petra didn't need to be nice to you, she didn't need to offer to help you with anything but once you made yourself step inside her shoes you were able to see why she had perceived you the way that she initially had.

"I'm sorry."

Your voice was silent and stripped of any emotion other than shame yet Petra was beaming at you in response.

Her warm smile was elegant and comforting as she stared at you, taking another gulp of her drink with a soft giggle. Your eyes were locked with hers, saddened (e/c) irises staring into her hazel ones, as she smiled even more little by little.

It was strange.

There was a different kind of bubbling inside your chest and you knew because your heart wasn't hammering anymore, not was your stomach trying to be ripped apart in tiny pieces after it vored into your other intestines. You felt serene, at peace even.

It clicked to you that this is what must feel to be forgiven.

"It's fine, plus you guys kinda deserve each other." Petra laughed at your chocked inhale, pressing a comforting, gloved palm to your shoulder. "I'd rather find my happiness when I'm not in between two people that struggle to find theirs."

Petra nuzzled to the comfort of her jacket, giving you a scrunched up bunny smile. You knew it's not that she hoped you could be best friends after this. She simply wanted to make sure that she could do her best to help two people find happiness. And it wasn't all that bad, you figured. You didn't know what you would do were you in her place.

In a way, you admired Petra for being so strong.

"Besides, girls shouldn't bring down other girls."

"Yeah, and I'm sorry about what I did behind your back. I own up to my mistake. I can't take it back but I can promise that I won't become this toxic ever again."

You shot an apologetic side smile at her as you followed her tracks.

Taking a new look in your surroundings, you deeply inhaled the cold air, filling your lungs in shivering winter freshness. A few specs of snow were adorning Petra's hair as the fell from the sky in a dainty manner, licking the stray threads that popped from her wooly gloves.

There definitely was a commotion a few blocks away. You could hear sirens go off not so far from your spot but you chose to ignore them, it was typical for a city person to filter out unnecessary noise, and having to live in Trost added tons to what you had to filter or not.

"It's December twenty six and the two is back to being a Mayhem." Petra sighed.

"It's like we're Gotham or some shit."

"Gotham?" Petra blinked at you, earning a gasp from you.

"Step one to being the friend of someone who's majoring in comics-"

"Oh, friends yay!"

Shaking your head, to ignore the child like enthusiasm, you continued, "Please know the most well known fictional city, it's Batman's city too."

"OH!" Petra's mouth fell agape as she took in the information, but she quickly giggled again as she saw that you easily took a gulp of your beverage "you're right."

For what seemed like a second you felt at peace once again. Petra bubbled about how she wanted to apologise to Levi about her rather cold behavior last night, and explained in the most non detailed way how it was the memory of the passing of her mother that had caused her to become this grumpy.

"Don't worry Petra! But beware, you could be turning into Levi version two point oh and-"

A loud sound startled you, sending both you and Petra back a few steps. Dumbfounded, you stared at each other and around you, locking eyes with different by passers that were just as shocked as you.

"Maybe we should go back!" Petra suggested. You simply nodded, hearing a good amount of running footsteps coming to the direction of the block you were in. In any way, getting caught up with a manhunt wasn't in your plans for today

"Yeah maybe we shou-"

Your words were cut off absurdly, harshly and shockingly all together. As gunmetal orbs locked with yours, your eyelids shot open, hour mouth dropping to the snow covered concrete.

"Levi?"

Wait, Levi? That was actually so random

Before you could manage to process what was going on around you, or why on earth Levi had just popped up from the alley right across you another head splitting sound filled the air.

Levi -yes, this was indeed Levi, you just didn't really know how to process this- collapsed on his knees like a rag doll, his torso and head giving in to the exhaustion of his body. Once he fell, you stood frozen, shieldimg Petra with one hand as the two of you watched in horror while crimson started littering the sugary snow.

"Call an ambulance." You spoke dryly, eyes still wide with horror.

The people who had seemed to be after Levi quickly fell onto the hands of the hands of a handful of police men who were on their tracks, but you couldn't care to look at their faces. You just run towards Levi, always followed by a petrified Petra, your feet giving in as you kneeled right next to him, your fingers gingery ghosting over him just to inspect what was his condition.

You listened as Petra spoke with the emergency center in horror, explaining what was the scene before her eyes while struggling to keep herself from trembling.

"What's going on?" Shy muttered once she detached the phone off her ear.

"I'm pretty sure now is not the right time for a story, but Levi used to be in a street gang in his teens."

"Oh boy."

Oh boy indeed.

Here's your gentle reminder that constructive criticism makes me cry because I'm a baby

Taglist: @sasageyowrites @liddolwhynot2000 @ackermans-freedom-inc @callmepromise @nobody-knows-anymore @levisbrat25 @thethyri @hawkssnugget @berrijam @melancholicmonologue

[jazziehart]

Character Dissection [Rachel Berry]: Episode by Episode - Season 2B

Hello and welcome back to the second half of my Season 2 character dissection of Rachel Berry. Once again I want to leave a warning that my review of Rachel this season isn’t positive so if you are a huge fan, I think it’s best of you click off of this. If not, here are my thought on Rachel for the second half of Season 2 from The Sue Sylvester Shuffle to New York

Let’s start off with the superbowl episode of Glee the Sue Sylvester Shuffle. This episode is one of the 2, 90 minute episodes in Season 2. In this episode the Glee Club and the football team are made to work together after their personal conflicts are hindering the team. Rachel is very unhappy with the newest additions as are most of the club but she’s especially upset about Karofsky. Will soon asks her to perform a new duet she’s been working on with Puck, something that confuses and upsets Finn at first. The performance doesn’t go over well and ends with the clubs fighting. Sue soon decides to make the Unholy Trinity choose between Cheerios and Glee which proves to be a conflict for them but Rachel insists that she knows Quinn will choose Cheerios which pissed me off (avid Quinn fan here but I think you knew that). The Unholy Trinity do end up choosing Cheerios for awhile due to Quinn being scared to losing her status, Brittany worrying about the baby cannons, and Santana just liking being a cheerio more than being in Glee. The football team and Glee Club however seem to be really together, that is until the team gets slushied and quits on Coach Beiste. Rachel and Mercedes meet up with Kurt and Blaine who reveal that they only need 9 players and they come up with a plan, to have the Glee girls fill the team but not play the game, something that is accepted. Rachel is enthusiatic about playing and follows what she said she would do unlike some of the other girls who end up playing. Once Quinn, Brittany, and Santana rejoin the Glee Club, Rachel and the other glee girls help cheer on the game and that’s where Rachel’s storyline ends in that episode.

Up next is Silly Love Songs. Rachel is excited when Finn announces his kissing booth, declaring she will show up with a $50 to kiss him until he realizes that he still loves her, once again proving she isn’t able to give him the time to move past their incident or the space he needs to actually be with someone else who might be better for him. She is shown saying this at a sleepover where she’s with Mercedes and Kurt. I actually did like their friendship moments and the fact that Mercedes told them both not to emphasize on relationships and focus on themselves. Rachel does end up going to Finn’s kissing booth but only with a dollar. She is mad when he kisses her on the cheek instead of the lips which she was expecting. He soon gives her a delayed Christmas present, a gold star necklace. He tells her that he still needs space to get over what happened but it doesn’t mean that he doesn’t care about her. Rachel upset accepts his answer and walks away. She later finds out that Finn and Quinn have kissed when she’s taking care of Finn after he gets mono. When Rachel realizes he cares about Quinn and not her she is unhappy but decides that Mercedes was right that she needed to be single for awhile. Some minor storylines she’s involved in are when Santana is insulting the club like she usually does and Rachel strikes back at her leading Santana to leave visibly upset. She also is seen confused by Puck singing ‘Fat Bottomed Girls’ to Lauren but soon gets into it. Finally, she’s seen at Breadstix where Kurt says to her and Mercedes that this is the year for the singles. 

Moving onto Comeback. After losing Finn, Rachel decides she wants to make a comeback for her career and be trendy within the school so she enlists Brittany to try to popularize her looks. Funny enough this does work and people are copying Brittany but Brittany wore the leg warmers on her arms leading the other girls to do the same and once she finally wears the same look as Rachel, people can only credit Brittany with their ideas which makes Rachel hurt and upset. Brittany explains to Rachel that no one in school sees her as a trendsetter which Rachel is obviously hurt about but soon Rachel finds what she is a trendsetter in and that’s Glee Club. She gets a new idea that would continue throughout the season of wanting to do original songs. No one supports the idea at first but Finn tells her that he does in private. Rachel is obviously upset that he didn’t speak up but he tells her the only way to prove she’s right is to write a great song. He also says he liked the Rachel he saw in Glee Club and said that she’s making a comeback which Rachel is happy about.

Up next is Blame It on the Alcohol one of the more entertaining episodes. We start off with Rachel’s hilariously bad original song ‘My Headband’ which Finn tries to tell her gently that it’s bad. Rachel takes this opportunity to take Puck up on his offer for a party while her dads are out of town hoping it would help with her songwriting. She hosts a party which almost ends before it begins but with Puck breaking into the liquor cabinet, everyone drinks and has a good time. While drunk Rachel starts to hit on Finn leading Finn to walk her through the types of drunks saying Rachel was a needy drunk. She gets upset by this and decides to start a game of ‘Spin the Bottle’ which leads to her and Blaine kissing which progresses into more for Rachel. After the party Rachel drunkenly asks him out on a date which Blaine accepts. The two go on a date but have yet to kiss which Kurt believes is proof that Blaine is gay. Rachel tells Kurt that she’ll kiss Blaine again sober and they’ll see who’s right. Rachel throughout the episode continues to drink as do most of the other members of the club but it leads to probably one of the most iconic moments during the pep assembly where Brittany pukes on Rachel. Rachel swears off drinking after this happens stating it did nothing for her song writing. She then meets Kurt and Blaine at the Lima Bean where she kisses an unexpectant Blaine who declares that he’s definitely gay. Rachel actually takes this well thinking it could be a great song. 

Up next is Sexy. Rachel has joined the celibacy club for some unknown reason and she and Quinn are the only two members. Rachel is constantly asking Quinn about her relationship with Finn which Quinn doesn’t want to answer about since she agreed not to tell Rachel about their relationship since Finn didn’t want her to get hurt. Throughout the episode Rachel isn’t into Holly’s Sexy lessons even though she does join in on the number towards the end after Holly brings her and Quinn into the number. Puck soon joins the celibacy club much to Rachel and Quinn’s surprise and joins them in on the celibacy club’s number of ‘Afternoon Delight’. Other than that Rachel doesn’t have much of a storyline in the episode.

Moving onto one of Rachel’s most important episodes Original Song. This episode starts off with Rachel once again trying her hand at an original song delivering the slightly better ‘Only Child’. Finn tells her that her writing isn’t there and the song should be more emotional. Later on when news breaks that ‘Sing’ was taken away from the New Directions, Rachel once again tries to suggest original songs. This time she gets support from an unlikely source of Quinn who is trying to keep Rachel closer to keep her away from Finn. Once Quinn is onboard the entire club seems to fight over who’s going to get to write a song and the club now has decided to do original songs. Rachel soon notices how Finn and Quinn are with each other in the hall and decides to confront Quinn about it. Rachel finally asks her if she and Finn are together which Quinn tells her it’s true. Rachel is clearly hurt by it and adds that Finn had once chosen Rachel over her. Also hurt Quinn snips back asking how long did it last for. Rachel, playing the victim claims Quinn is being ‘so mean’. Girl you started it bringing up that he chose you over her which you know is a sore spot. Rachel claims she’s not going to give up on Finn that it isn’t over to which Quinn exclaims that it is and that Rachel keeps making the same mistakes looking to be with Finn and that if she keeps it up she’ll never Get It Right. This conversation inspires Rachel to write her original song of the same title. While at Regionals Rachel tells Finn that she means every word, once again trying to get Finn away from his girlfriend. The two really bond at Regionals and are thrilled when the New Directions win. The New Directions soon award Rachel the MVP award which everyone voted for her for, even Quinn. Rachel is touched by the award and the New Directions all hug her afterwards.

Up next is A Night of Neglect, probably one of my least favorite episodes of Season 2. Mostly because there isn’t too much of a plot involving the New Directions. Rachel’s biggest plot point is the fact that she wants the closing slot and like everyone else is pushing Mercedes aside. This eventually has Mercedes turn into a diva and make demands. Rachel eventually goes to talk to her and tries to encourage Mercedes that she is good enough and that she didn’t need to make the crazy demands to be respected. Eventually she convinces Mercedes to come back and allows her to have the closing number. 

Moving on to one of my all-time favorite episodes Born This Way. This episode actually focuses a lot on Rachel and her insecurity with her nose and how she contemplates getting a nose job. I just want to point out that this was completely out of character for her and a stark contrast to how she was in Acafellas where she rejected the idea of a nose job and told the club that their quirks were what made them special. I know she wanted to look more like Quinn which is unsurpisingly driving her nose job but it was a little strange that she considered it. Her nose was injured and the doctor did suggest it but she always seemed to want to keep her nose the same up until that point. Anyway, she asks Quinn to accompany her to the consultation which Quinn does (as it’s revealed in the episode that Quinn herself had a nose job so she’s not against helping Rachel do the same, sorry Faberry shippers this has nothing to do with Quinn being in love with Rachel). Rachel is admant about wanting to get the nose job not even Finn can convince her not to. But you know who arranges something that actually helps her decide against it? Puck. He enlists the help of Kurt who have a flashmob saying that Rachel is like Barbra Streisand and that she shouldn’t get a nose job which leaves Rachel convinced not to do it. She does have the septoplasty but avoids getting a nose job and wears a shirt embracing her nose.

Up next is Rumours which is one of Rachel’s worst episodes in my opinion. She starts off innocent enough asking Sam to the prom which he declines saying he doesn’t think he’s going to prom. Rachel keeps insisting that they go to prom which leads Sam to tell Rachel he’s just not into her like that. Rachel is shocked but soon reads an article in the Muckraker that she shows to Finn saying that Quinn was at a motel with Sam. While it looks bad on the outside, Quinn is actually helping Sam’s family out by babysitting his siblings. Quinn won’t say what’s happening leading Finn to accuse her of cheating, much to Rachel’s delight. Finn soon asks Rachel to stake out with him in an attempt to catch Quinn and Sam in the act. Their first stake out only sees Sam hugging Kurt goodbye which they mistakenly interpret as Sam having a relationship with Kurt as well. While I get Finn thinking this, Rachel should’ve known better. Quinn confronts Finn about staking out with Rachel and they perform a duet clearly upset with each other. Rachel comments that she thinks Quinn’s duet with Sam was better and Quinn knows exactly what Rachel’s doing and calls her out on it and insists that Finn and Rachel no longer sing together declaring that she doesn’t trust Rachel. Rachel and Finn once again stake out and see Sam and Quinn together. Rachel soon decides to sing a song mostly directing her attention to Finn to piss off Quinn who is upset by it saying what Rachel did was inappropriate and then Rachel goes off saying awful things about how Quinn’s a hypocrite which leads poor Sam to reveal that Quinn wasn’t lying but that his family lost their home and were living in a motel. Rachel and Finn go to make amends with Sam and it all works out. This episode is a good one but Rachel’s actions especially piss me off. This is probably her worst episode in my opinion.

Now moving onto Prom Queen. Rachel sees how upset Mercedes is about Prom and actually does a good thing and talks to her coming up with a plan of Prom on a budget for the two of them to go with Sam. Sam accepts their offer and the 3 of them were going to prom together. All is fine and well until Jesse comes back. Rachel is surpised to see him and Jesse admits he came back for her then asks her to prom. Rachel accepts and Finn soon finds out and is annoyed. Rachel tries to help him with picking a corsage for Quinn, something many Faberry shippers try to say is how they know Rachel loved her because she knew what matched her eyes. Honestly she only made the suggestion to Finn to get something that was green, Finn was the one who picked it out. Anyway Rachel is clearly in love with Jesse as they go on their date with Sam and Mercedes but still seems constantly torn between him and Finn throughout the prom. Jesse and Finn get into a fight over Rachel something both girls try to put a stop to. I feel awful for Quinn since Prom was such a big deal to her and to have it be ruined by the one person who you are insecure about sucks. When Quinn loses Prom Queen Rachel tries to go talk to her. Quinn blames Rachel because everyone knows Finn would rather be with her. She slaps Rachel clearly getting out her frustration for the night but soon apologizes. Rachel comforts Quinn who’s scared because she’s pretty much lost nearly everything she cares about. I know Faberry shippers look at this as a romantic moment between them and I’ve addressed this before, but Rachel only went after her because she knew Quinn was angry with her. She comforted Quinn because she wanted to be her friend. There is nothing romantic there. Sorry for my ranting about them. Anyway the two agree to support Kurt and go back to the prom. Rachel dances with Mercedes and Sam and Quinn dances the night away trying to forget what happened.

Moving onto Funeral. This episode Rachel is competing to be the star of the New Directions and tries to encourage Finn that he’s good enough. She kills her audition but is fighting with the others who want the lead, Santana, Kurt, and Mercedes which leads to Will nixxing the competition. Her only other storyline is with Jesse and her unresolved feelings for him. Jesse promises Rachel that she’ll win and Rachel is so thrilled with that they hug. Rachel is upset when the competition is taken away but agrees to help the club write a song for Nationals something she’s been looking forward to.

Finally, we close with the season finale of New York. Rachel is obviously enthuiastic about New York but makes an error that’s unlike her, saying she got tickets to Cats which had been closed for 10 years. It took Quinn of all people to tell her that. Rachel was Broadway obsessed why would she even think there was a chance that those tickets were real? Anyway she’s incredibly conflicted throughout the entire episode about following her career or getting with Finn. She originally chooses her career but that’s overshadowed when she and Finn kiss after their duet, something that ends up costing them Nationals. Santana is pissed and tries to attack Rachel after they lose. Finn and Rachel soon have a conversation about their relationship and Rachel gets back with him realizing she has another year to go after her New York dreams.

Let’s go to the overview. Rachel is once again selfish with many decisions she makes especially when it comes to Finn. She has somewhat of an obsession of getting him back and is willing to do whatever it takes, something that is constantly hurting Quinn who is his girlfriend for the majority of this half of the season. She is however a really good friend to Kurt and Mercedes which is something that wasn’t truly defined in Season 1 due to her not getting along with everyone. Overall this version of Rachel is still my least favorite even though Season 3 will be coming in a very close second. Stay tuned for the Season 3 post coming your way. Until then, be respectful and kind.

[misa-chu]

Just a quick fish update! No pics bc ive mostly just been staring instead of trying to take pictures lol

Everyone is still doing well, one or two nerites dont seem thrilled about the move, or maybe the loaches just keep knocking them on their backs? But they are all still alive and most of them move around quite a lot! Speaking of the loaches though, the dojos are the friendliest fish ever omfg. They come eat out of my hand and taste my arm XD the barbs on the other hand like to come nip me as if to say “food now!” But dart away if i move. there appears to be two males and four males, which is excellent. The platys are just sorta there, nothing particularly special to note about them other than just judging by behavior theres two males and two females. Next time i go to the petstore i may try to pick out two more girls, but I’m still pretty garbage at sexing based on appearance.

I still see the kuhlis pretty often, though they are quite shy! Id like to get another one or two eventually to see if itd help their confidence. The panda cories are very much their own little clique, seperate of the albinos, but theyre all super friendly and easy going with each other when its feeding time, which is the most important thing. The amano boy is still in there somewhere, I saw him cleaning the glass woth one of the otos the night before ^^

The tetras had what I thought was ich, but one dose of paraguard and it never came back? It was never more than a dingle spot or two on just a handful of fish, so maybe it was just nip marks. Theyre all very active regardless! When I feed it’s like a little fish tornado, its so cute. The betta boy continues to live happily with them, I feed him up top while the tetras get already wet food so it sinks faster. He’s built two bubble nests already and hangs around them like he’s ready for a lady lol. If i had the space and no tetras i would be sorely tempted to try introducing him to Amelie, I think they’d have beautiful babies and theyre both so wonderfully mellow. He still needs a name- I’m sort of thinking Carl? But tbh I’m not sure.

And finally the habrosus cories! They’re just now starting to chill out and hang with the pygmy cories, until the last day or two they were constantly patroling the tank together. Unsurpisingly Amelie pays them very little mind, she’s always been so chill about the pygmys so I wasnt worried.

[ebaeschnbliah]

THE  RETURN  OF  BASKERVILLE

________________________________________________________________

Thank you @monikakrasnorada for your question about the 'Black Pearl of the Borgias' (here). It inspired a lot of thinking and led to connecting several dots between 'The Hounds of Baskerville' and Series four of Sherlock BBC. Found some lovely treasures here. :))))

More under the cut ...

Things  vanishing from secure places __________________

Bluebell (THOB):  A little girl calls Sherlock for help (well, well ...) because her rabbit vanished from a locked hutch. No sign of forced entry could be found.

SHERLOCK (irritated): A rabbit, John! JOHN: Oh. SHERLOCK (sarcastically): Ah, but there’s more! Before Bluebell disappeared, it turned luminous ... (he adopts a little girl’s voice for the next three words.) ... “like a fairy” according to little Kirsty.

As it turns out later, Bluebell the 'glow in the dark rabbit' originates from Baskerville. Kirsty's mother works there and performs secret genetic experiments on animals. Things got a bit mixed up and Bluebell ended up at the wrong place. Therefore the rabbit had to go. The glowing was achieved by a gene from a jellyfish (Aequoria Victoria).  @devoursjohnlock wrote a whole meta about jellyfish 'Predator and Prey' and the above mentioned species plays a big role in it. It's Mycroft's jellyfish  :))))

The Black Pearl of the Borgias (TST):  The legendary gem was stolen from a secure vault in Georgia. Interpol seems to have not the slightes idea who could have done it. There are no suspects. Unsurpisingly only one person has some information about an interested party. Mycroft Holmes is as always very well informed about the plans of Jim Moriarty.

MYCROFT: .... Moriarty has shown some interest in tracking down the Black Pearl of the Borgias – which is still missing, by the way, in case you feel like applying yourself to something practical. SHERLOCK: It’s a pearl. Get another one.

Sherlock's reaction to take on the 'Black Pearl Case' is a bit similar to that of the 'Bluebell Case'. Not interested at all. Almost offended and annoyed.

Redbeard (S4):  The information about 'Redbeard' leaves the 'secure and very secretive installation' of Sherrinford. It is passed on from Eurus to Jim ... who was a Christmas present requested by Eurus because she noticed Jim's interest in Sherlock. Mycroft allowed five minutes of unsupervised conversation between Eurus and Jim..

JIM: I’m your Christmas present. So what’s mine? (In the governor’s office, Mycroft watches as the footage is replaced by an image of a heavy flow of water pouring down the screens.) EURUS (softly): Redbeard.

Sherlock's reaction to the mention of the name 'Redbeard' ..... is shock ... every time he hears it.

What follows in the wake of Bluebell, Black Pearl and Redbeard _____________________________________

1.  Sherlock is offered the case of 'Bluebell the glowing rabbit'. Sherlock is not interested. The case of the 'Monstrous Hound' appears immediately afterwards. And the 'hound' is glowing as well.

JOHN: But that wasn’t what you saw. That wasn’t just an ordinary dog. SHERLOCK: No. (His gaze become distant.) It was immense, had burning red eyes and it was glowing, John. Its whole body was glowing.

2.  Sherlock is offered the case of the 'Black Pearl of the Borgias' ... twice. Once by Mycroft, once by DI Hopkins. Sherlock is still not interested.

(There’s a knock on the door and Hopkins opens it and comes in.) HOPKINS: Uh, Sherlock ... SHERLOCK (quick fire): Borgia Pearl, boring, go. (He turns her around and pushes her towards the landing.) HOPKINS: Uh, but, uh ... SHERLOCK: Go!

Shortly afterwards Sherlock stumbles over Ajay ... once a member of AGRA and involved in the 'Tiblise hostage incident' in Georgia. Sherlock suspects him to be the thief of the precious pearl but it turns out Ajay isn't looking for that pearl at all. He is instead after one of the flash drives containing information about AGRA. Confronting Mary with the news, Sherlock gets drugged and 'Redbeard' appears in his memory.

3.  Sherlock takes on the case of 'Redbeard the drowned dog' which is also the case of 'Eurus - the lost sister - the other one'. And he sets out on his journey to Sherrinford where he fights demons and monsters inside himself.

Connections between Bluebell, Black Pearl, Redbeard ___

Bluebell is a rabbit. Rabbits get chased by dogs. Dogs used for hunting are called 'hounds'. While going to his Mind Palace in THOB, Sherlock finds among other memories the song 'Hound Dog' by Elvis (who is recognizable by just one name as well :)

You ain't nothin' but a hound dog Cryin' all the time Well, you ain't never caught a rabbit And you ain't no friend of mine

At the end of THOB it is shown that Jim Moriarty gets released from prison by Mycroft Holmes. And that prison cell looks a lot like it could be located at Sherrinford.

Black Pearl is the name of a famous movie-pirate ship. A pirate basically is ... a thief. Pirates are often portrayed as heroic rebells against some government. Sherlock wanted to become a pirate. He played pirate with his 'best friend' ... be it the boy,  the dog or something else entirly. Both ... boy and dog ... are called 'Redbeard'. Sherlock didn't like the story of Samarra so he told himself another one. In this version the merchant doesn't die but becomes a pirate. (Henry and Jim also told themselves different stories. Henry imagined the 'monstrous hound'. Jim turned 'Nativity' into 'The hungry Donkey')

Redbeard ... the dog shown as Redbeard is an Irish Setter. That's a breed for hunting. (Sherlock in canon is compared to a Bloodhound) The first time an Irish Setter appears in Sherlock BBC is at the beginning of THOB.

GRACE: What is it, dear? Are you lost? (The dog pokes its nose towards little Henry in a friendly way. Henry screams in utter terror.)

Questionable Experiments __________________________

The Hounds of Baskerville - Sherlock locks John into a lab to test the possible impact of the drugs on him.

JOHN: Oh God. It was you. You locked me in that bloody lab. SHERLOCK: I had to. It was an experiment. JOHN (furiously): An experiment?!

The Final Problem - as all characters involved represent certain parts of Sherlock himself ... Sherlock is actually experimenting on himself.

EURUS: This is an experiment. There will be rigour.

SHERLOCK: Molly, this is for a case. It’s ... it’s a sort of experiment. MOLLY: I’m not an experiment, Sherlock. SHERLOCK: No, I know you’re not an experiment. You’re my friend.

SHERLOCK: This isn’t torture; this is vivisection. We’re experiencing science from the perspective of lab rats.

Therapists shooting clients and getting shot by clients ___

THOB:  Henry shoots at his therapist .... but into the mirror ... therefore Dr. Mortimer survives.

TFP:  Eurus shoots John .... but with a tranquilizer as it is later revealed ... therefore John survives.

What is the meaning of this?  Considering that Henry is a big Sherlock mirror and Eurus turns out to be a part of Sherlock . It is implied here that on both occasions Sherlock is the one who is shooting at someone ....

Drugs involved ____________________________________

The Hounds of Baskerville - Project HOUND -  turns out to be a 'new deleriant drug which renders its users incredibly suggestible'. It was planned to be used as an anti-personnel weapon to totally disorientate the enemy. A drug based on fear and stimulus. Prolonged exposure leads to insanity and almost uncontrollable agression.

Sherlock’s concentration becomes intense as he takes it all in and focuses on certain phrases like “extreme suggestibility”, “fear and stimulus”, “conditioned terror”, “aerosol dispersal”.

The Lying Detective - TD12 -   is normally used by dentists and hospitals for minor surgical procedures. But it is capable to interfere with the memory if the drug is administered through infusion bags and drip feeds at exactly the right level. Ignorance is bliss ... and what's wrong with bliss ... TD12 is a memory inhibitor for anyone who doesn't opt to remember.

SMITH: Nothing that is happening to you now will stay with you for more than a few minutes. I’m afraid that some of the memories you’ve had up to this point might also be ... corrupted.

One drug to create fear and agression ... leading to insanity

One drug to inhibit and corrupt the memory

The locations of secret facilities _______________________

Baskerville:  This top secret army facility can be found in Dartmoor near Grimpen Village. Sourrounded by the Grimpen minefield .... marked by skull and crossbones (like pirate flags) to keep people out. (It's Grimpen Mire in canon)   A moor - a mire - a swamp .... basically this is a place staturated with water. And rumors say tha in the secret labs there ... terrible things can be seen.

PRESENTER (voiceover): … the chemical and biological weapons research centre which is said to be even more sensitive than Porton Down. Since the end of the Second World War, there’ve been persistent stories about the Baskerville experiments: genetic mutations, animals grown for the battlefield. There are many who believe that within this compound, in the heart of this ancient wilderness, there are horrors beyond imagining. But the real question is: are all of them still inside?

Supervisor ot that facility is the government .... is Mycroft Holmes.

CCV1 • security authorization requested • holmes, mycroft • priority ultra processing CCV1 •

Sherrinford:  This top secret facility can be found on an island sourrounded by the sea. Wise people react alarmed and terrified when they hear the name. 'If you ever get that message .... just forget you ever heard it'. (Sherrinford has been compared to 'Shutter Island'. Well, I wonder if one could compare it to 'Treasure Island' as well. :)

MYCROFT: There’s a place called Sherrinford; an island. It’s a secure and very secretive installation whose sole purpose is to contain what we call ‘the uncontainables. The demons beneath the road – this is where we trap them. Sherrinford is more than a prison or an asylum; it is a fortress built to keep the rest of the world safe from what is inside it. Heaven may be a fantasy for the credulous and the afraid, but I can give you a map reference for hell.

Supervisor ot that facility is the government .... is Mycroft Holmes.

MYCROFT: I presume the tapes are in my office? GOVERNOR: Your office? MYCROFT: Cast your mind back. It used to be yours

A case of mistaken identity ___________________________

Baskerville:  Major Barrymore is led to believe he deals with Mycroft Holmes when in fact it is Sherlock.

Sherrinford: The governor thinks he has to deal with Sherlock Holmes when in fact it is Mycroft.

A facility with several levels __________________________

Baskerville:  When Sherlock, John and Lyons enter the lift to visit the labs of Baskerville, it can be seen that there are five floors beneath them .... marked -1, -2, -3, -4 and B. They go down from the goundfloor only to the very next level.

JOHN: How far down does that lift go? LYONS: Quite a way, sir. JOHN: Mmm-hmm. And what’s down there? LYONS: Well, we have to keep the bins somewhere, sir. This way please, gentlemen.

Sherrinford:  'On the wall behind Mycroft appears an image of an Alcatraz-like castle on top of a cliff. Guards armed with rifles patrol across the roof. The perspective changes to show that the prison is at the top of steep granite cliffs on a small island. As Mycroft continues to speak, a schematic overlays a side view of the island showing that much of the facility is underground.'

If Sherlock and John had gone deeper in Baskerville ... I wonder if they would have emerged in Sherrinford.  :)))

And then suddenly one notices that all the heads have gone red ..... again.

These are just the more obvious things that connect THOB to S4. There is a lot more to find. But this post is already long enough.  :)))))

I leave you to your own deductions. Great thanks to @callie-ariane for the scripts.

Just noticed that @kateis-cakeis wrote today about THOB as well. Imaginary Hound ... a meta full of light. :)))

July, 2017

@gosherlocked @loveismyrevolution @sagestreet @sherlockshadow @sarahthecoat @darlingtonsubstitution @devoursjohnlock