#been having really bad pain flare up + seizures lately | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

i-am-out-of-my-vulcan-mind · 4 years ago

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Alternative Ending

Here’s my attempt at writing an alternative ending. Of course it’s whumpy, this is me we are talking about. But I hope you enjoy it all the same.

Special thanks to @lurkingwhump, @unorthodox-oblivion and @guadalajara92 for listening to me ramble about this.

This is for my @badthingshappenbingo bingo square “poison/venom”

She could hear her husband, saying all of these wonderful things to her - trying to convince her that she was a good person.

“Jane, you’ve done a lot of good things - and a hell of a lot more good than bad.” he smiled at her gently. “You’re allowed to be done… we both are.”

Jane closed her eyes, nodding. She really hoped that he was right. She was so tired of it all. She just wanted peace.

Without warning, a wave of vertigo washed over her, her consciousness fading.

She swayed, Kurt reaching out for her. “Woah - hey! Woah, Jane! What’s wrong?!” His steady touch seemed to ground her, bring her back. She opened her eyes to look at him, fear in her heart.

“I don’t think I have much time left.” she murmured shakily. “I need to get more antidote before it’s too late.” Her breathing was accelerating, her ears buzzing. She knew the ZIP was close. It was an all too familiar feeling.

“Hey… Patterson we need to cut these wires now!” Kurt called. He could see the worry in his wife’s eyes and knew they were quickly running out of time. Jane wasn’t one to show weakness, so to be able to see her fading this quickly was incredibly scary.

Jane tried to focus on Rich and Patterson bickering in her earpiece. Her head was swimming and her ears were buzzing. She was trying with all her might to remain conscious.

“Cut the green wire!” Patterson called. Jane and Kurt directed their cutters to the right wires.

“Got it!” Kurt replied.

“Simultaneously!” Patterson and Rich called in unison.

“Argh!” Jane growled. The whole city was depending on them… if they were wrong…

She looked up at Kurt.

“Five seconds…”

“You ready?”

Kurt pulled her towards him, capturing her lips with his own. If Patterson and Rich were wrong, and they were about to cut the wrong wire… then he would be damned if his last moment wasn’t going to be kissing his wife.

In a silent communication, they cut their respective wires in perfect unison. They broke their kiss, gasping in relief.

“We did it!” Kurt cried, grasping her arms.

“We did it!” Jane repeated, completely shocked they had actually stopped the bomb from detonating.

She glanced up at him lovingly, knowing in her heart that this would be the last time she saw his face. She knew she was about to die. She knew her time had finally run out. Within seconds, the ZIP buzzing in her ears reached its peak. Her vision flashed, before her knees buckled, collapsing to the ground with a hard thwack! She could hear Kurt’s cries of anguish, before the world rose up and swallowed her whole.

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“Jane!” Kurt yelled, scrambling to his knees and leaning over her. He checked her pulse, his breath catching when he couldn’t find one. Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god - fuck!

“Help! I need medics!” Kurt called to the empty square. “Tasha!?” he cried, turning Jane so she was lying on her back. He started CPR, wondering why the fuck he was yet again trying to save her. When were they going to catch a break? Would they ever be able to lead a normal life?

“Patterson!?” he called through his comms, “I need medics now!”

“They’re on their way Kurt…” Patterson replied, though he could hear the fear in her voice.

Kurt continued giving his wife compressions, until Tasha showed up with the medics. It was only minutes later, but it felt like forever.

The medics quickly took over, assessing the situation. Tasha gently pulled Kurt away, giving them room to work.

Kurt watched helplessly as they tried to bring Jane back, Tasha’s firm hold on his arm the only thing stopping him from running back to his lifeless wife. Was he really about to lose her? They had just been handed a fresh start… a clean slate… he couldn’t go through the rest of his life without her. It was just too cruel.

The paramedic performing the compressions stopped to check for a pulse, placing one hand on top of Jane’s head, and the other on her neck. He shook his head, swapping places with the other medic as not to not exhaust himself . The second medic started performing compressions again.

Kurt couldn’t help the cry of anguish that escaped his throat. Tears leaked from his eyes and he watched his wife die. Tasha continued to hold his arm, her own tears running down her face.

A couple of minutes later, they stopped compressions again, checking her pulse.

“I’ve got something!” the second medic cried. At those words, Kurt sagged to the ground, relief pouring out of him in ragged cries. Tasha rubbed his shoulder, her own breath hitching.

They watched as the medics placed an oxygen mask over Jane’s face and connect her to a monitor to track her pulse. Knowing they were starting to pack her up to take her to the hospital, Kurt chose that moment to pick himself up off the ground. He needed to tell the medics of her history - that there was no point taking her to the hospital.

He strode forward, just as they had loaded her onto a gurney and lifted it to standing level. He grabbed his wife’s hand before addressing the medics.

“We need to get her back to the New York Office. She’s been poisoned and the antidote is in the medical bay… it’s the only thing that will save her.” Kurt explained.

The medics shared a look. This was an unorthodox situation.

“Please…” Kurt continued, gearing up to have to beg. “It’s the only thing that will save her life.”

The lead medic thought for a moment, before nodding. “Ok.” Was all he said before they loaded Jane into the back of the ambulance. “We will meet you there.”

With that they were gone.

Kurt ran back to Tasha. “Come on.” he said quietly, before they took off at a run towards their vehicle. They sped all the way back to the NYO, lights and sirens on. Kurt let Tasha drive, too nervous to pay attention to the road. He wrung his hands together… would she still be alive when they got there? We’re they making the right decision not taking her to the hospital?

They made it to the office a short while after the ambulance arrived. Jane was still unconscious when Tasha and Kurt made it to the medbay. Doctor Horne had already started an IV and was administering the antidote.

Kurt stopped short when he saw Jane’s face. She looked lifeless still, her face pale, her lips blue. Veins stuck out of her forehead and tracked down her neck.

“Oh… Jane…” he whispered, moving to hold her hand. He stood to the side, not wanting to get in the way of the medical team, but also needing to physically touch her.

“Let’s get some warming blankets on her.” Doctor Horne directed.

Kurt looked up at the monitor. Her heart rate was slow, her blood pressure was low and her temperature was sitting at 94.6°. She was still dying. There was still a chance she wouldn’t make it.

He squeezed her hand, praying to a God he didn’t believe in to spare her. He felt her hand squeeze back and looked up hopefully, only for his heart to plummet into his gut. Jane’s eyes had rolled into the back of her head, her body locked in a grand mal seizure. She started thrashing about the bed, the staff moving quickly to hold her down.

“Turn her on her side!” Doctor Horne instructed, holding the oxygen mask to her face.

There was not a lot they could do but wait the seizure out. Kurt watched them administer some medication into Jane’s IV line, which seemed to help stabilise her heartbeat, but the seizure didn’t stop.

After a long sixty seconds, Jane’s body slowly started to calm down, her rigid muscles relaxing. Doctor Horne opened Jane’s eyelids, flashing her penlight into her eyes.

“Both pupils are equal and responsive, let’s just leave her on her side for a bit, just in case she gets sick.”

Kurt moved back towards the bed, stroking his unconscious wife’s hair. He took in a shuddering breath, trying to stop the tears from leaking down his face.

Once the seizure had passed, the excess medical staff left the room, leaving them in near quiet - minus the beep of her heart rate and the drip of the antidote.

“Weller…” Tasha said softly. “Here.” She had brought a chair over for him so he could keep a vigil beside Jane. “I’m gonna go update Patterson and Rich… if you need me… call.” she said before walking out the door.

Truth be told Kurt had almost forgotten that she was there. His only focus was the near lifeless form lying on the bed in front of him.

“Hold on Jane… just a while longer.”

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Kurt sat in his chair, watching his wife. Her temperature seemed to have stabilised, the antidote finally showing signs of working. Her oxygen levels, heart rate and blood pressure normalising. They had switched her oxygen mask to a nasal cannula, giving her body a bit of extra help.

He reached out and took her hand, bringing it to his lips.

“It’s all over now baby… you’re going to be ok… the doctor said you’ve got a rough few days ahead of you… so you just rest while you can.”

Jane’s face screwed up in pain. She whimpered, choosing to ignore his request and wake up anyway. She shifted on the bed, trying to find a position that didn’t send tendrils of pain shooting through her entire body.

“Jane?”

His voice was like a pain killer, allowing her a moment of respite. She cracked her eyes open, blindly searching for his face.

“Kurt?” she uttered weakly, coughing softly as her pain flared again.

She felt him squeeze her hand, but she still couldn’t see him.

“’Oh!” she cried, before her pain stole her breath away.

“Jane?” Kurt asked again, his voice urgent. “Doctor… Doctor please! Help her!” Jane could hear the fear in his voice as he begged. She frowned. She didn’t want him to be sad.

She heard a new set of footsteps as the doctor entered the room. She felt the pull on her IV before a cold substance entered her bloodstream. The cold quickly warmed though, until her entire body was floating in a euphoric haze.

She drifted off again, the last thought going through her head was ‘who had been jumping on her chest?’

Kurt watched her fall back into a fitful sleep. He frowned when he saw her shiver under the blankets, standing to fetch a warming blanket from the cupboard, and gently laying it on her shuddering body.

“Shhh.” he murmured, stroking her hair off her face. “Just relax.”

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Jane woke up a few hours later, slowly opening her eyes. She blinked heavily, trying to get her blurry vision to focus.

“Kurt?” she whispered, her voice cracking. She winced in pain, her entire body feeling as if it had been beaten to a pulp.

“Hey.” he murmured, moving into her line of sight. “How are you doing?”

Jane swallowed thickly, a soft groan escaping.

“That good huh?” Kurt said gently, kissing her forehead softly. She definitely felt warmer than before. Things seemed to be looking up.

“What happened?” she mumbled weakly, still trying to get her sight to focus.

At Kurt’s silence, she turned her head towards him, trying to make out the expression on his face. She could hear him struggling, could feel the fear pouring out of him.

“The ZIP.” was all he managed to say before it all came flooding back.The hallucinations, the bomb in Times Square, the ZIP buzzing in her ears… the feeling of complete helplessness as her body shut down completely.

“Oh…”

“You’re heart stopped… I had to give you CPR for close to five minutes… the medics managed to get you back. You’ve been here for a few hours already… the antidote seems to be working this time.”

They sat in silence for a moment, both realising just how close she had come to dying.

“That would be why I can’t see properly.” she added quietly. The rest of her symptoms were to be expected, and the CPR explained why her chest was so sore.

“You can’t see?” Kurt asked worriedly. He moved closer to the bed, looking into her searching eyes.

“I can see, but everything is just a blur.”

She sighed exhaustedly, her eyes falling closed. She was far too tired to even try and comprehend what that could mean.

“Go back to sleep.” Kurt soothed. “It’s still the middle of the night.” He kissed her forehead before smoothing her hair back off her face. Her breathing evened out almost instantly. Kurt sat back in his chair, trying to work out how he had ever gotten so lucky. It seemed the antidote was working. She was going to be ok.

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Jane started vomiting violently a couple of hours later. The first time scared Kurt, as she had gone from quietly sleeping, to retching forcefully onto the floor. He had jumped to her side, pulling her hair off her face and supporting her so she didn’t fall off the bed.

The doctor had come in after a few episodes, explaining that this was one of her body’s ways of expelling the ZIP from her system. She said to prepare for some untoward symptoms, but that she should be fine in a few days - much like a virus.

Her fever spiked with the vomiting, climbing to the point where Kurt had to remove all of her blankets and place a cold washcloth on her forehead.

“If she carries on like this for much longer, I’m going to have to recommend we transfer her to the hospital.” Doctor Horne said, rubbing Jane’s back as she heaved into a bucket. Sweat was pouring off of her.

Jane spat into the bucket, her eyes squeezed shut in discomfort.

“No.” she practically begged. “I’m ok here…” she was cut off by another bout of vomiting, her body rejecting the ZIP in the only way it knew how - with sheer force.

Kurt moved forward to pull her hair off her face, the doctor continuing to rub her back. Jane whimpered as she felt her stomach try to turn itself inside out.

“Jane…” Kurt murmured when she got her breath back. She lay back on the pillows, her eyes closed in complete exhaustion. She shook her head.

“Your fever is getting pretty high.” Doctor Horne said. “And if you continue vomiting the way you are, I don’t think we are well enough equipped to keep up with your hydration… I would just feel more comfortable…”

“No…” Jane said again, though Kurt could tell the fight was draining from her.

“Jane... please.” He practically begged. “You need proper medical care… the antidote is working… there’s nothing more that Doctor Horne can do for you.”

Jane sighed, cracking her eyes open. She knew she was being silly. She knew that after everything that had happened in the last twenty four hours that she still needed medical intervention, she just really didn’t want to go back to the same place where the ZIP had nearly killed her the first time.

She looked into her husband's eyes. Seeing how worried and exhausted he was, she relented. She gave him a curt nod in affirmation.

“I’ll arrange for an ambulance.” Doctor Horne said, leaving them alone.

Kurt wet her washcloth, placing it back on her forehead. He moved across to the sink to wash out the bucket, before returning to her.

“Thank you.” he whispered, sitting on the side of her bed carefully. “I know you’re scared… but it’s the best place for you.”

Jane opened her mouth to protest, but thought better of it. She knew that he could see right through her.

“Jane…” he said softly. “Talk to me.” He could see her internal struggle and wanted to at least try and make things a little easier for her.

“I just hate hospitals.” she muttered, shifting on the bed to try and get more comfortable. She groaned when the movements flared her pain and jostled her already queasy stomach. Kurt clasped her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze in support.

“I know… but I really think you going is our best course of action. You’re already sick, and we don’t know what else could happen.”

Jane grimaced at the thought of any other potential ailments that could plague her body. She already felt wretched.

She sighed.

“I know it’s the best place for me to be… I just hate the thought of being back in the same place I nearly died… especially when it’s from the same cause.”

There. She said it. Her biggest vulnerability laid out on a silver platter.

Kurt moved off the bed, sitting back on his chair so he was eye level with her. He took her hand again, stroking his thumb up the small of her wrist.

“Jane…” he started, kissing her fingers gently. “This is different… you’ve already received the antidote… you’re not dying… not anymore.” he added sombrely.

Jane looked up at him, trying to get her eyes to focus on his face… what she wouldn’t give to be able to see his eyes right now.

“Your symptoms are just worse than what they can manage here… you’re not going to the hospital to die… you’re just going there to be observed… so you can get the best care as your body fights this.” He shifted again, moving back into the bed with her. He needed to hold her, to have that physical contact - and he knew she did too.

Jane squeezed his hand, taking a shaky breath.

“You’ll stay with me?” she asked in a small voice. Kurt's heart cracked at the vulnerability, but he couldn’t help the chuckle that escaped past his lips.

“If you think I’m letting you out of my sight after the last twenty four hours, then you’re sadly mistaken.”

He felt her muscles relax at that. At least he knew he could offer her some semblance of comfort, just by being close to her.

He heard her stomach gurgle, before her eyes squeezed shut and she started inhaling through her nose sharply. She held on tightly to the bed, trying to ground herself and swallowed convulsively.

“You gonna be sick again?” he asked knowingly, already reaching for the bucket.

Jane groaned miserably.

“This is disgusting.” she complained, before her body was wracked with heaves again.

Kurt winced in sympathy, placing the washcloth on the back of her neck.

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Jane was transferred successfully to the hospital. They moved her to a ward straight away, knowing she wouldn’t be able to get any rest in the ER. Thankfully, in moving to the hospital, she had access to some strong antiemetics, and therefore was able to sit up without wanting to puke.

They had moved a comfortable chair into the room for Kurt, knowing that after everything she had been through, he wouldn’t want to leave her. Another good thing about going back to the hospital where she was treated for her ZIP poisoning the first time, was the staff all remembered them. They had built a relationship with Jane and Weller and were therefore a little more accommodating than they usually would be. Kurt had to thank his lucky stars that they didn’t make him leave the moment visiting hours were over.

Jane’s temperature continued to climb. Now that the vomiting had stopped, cramps ripped through her system. She was starting to get very worried that she was about to lose the battle at the other end. The ZIP was still trying to force its way out.

Jane looked up at her husband from her curled position on the bed, frowning at the growing discomfort in her gut.

“You ok?” he asked sympathetically.

Jane shook her head.

“I feel awful.” she admitted. “How come this didn’t happen the first time?” she asked, wincing as the pain in her stomach flared out into the muscles in her legs.

“I asked Patterson that on the way over.” he replied. He had followed the ambulance to the hospital, protocol dictating he couldn’t ride with her. “She said that her antidote works a little differently. It essentially cleans out your system… she said that your body thinks it is fighting an infection, that’s why it is reacting this way.”

Jane groaned, the pain tracking up into her head. She squeezed her eyes shut, letting out an uncharacteristic whimper of pain.

The pain in her stomach disappeared, her bowels thankfully calming down, though the absence of pain didn’t last long as the agony in her head grew.

The doctor chose that moment to come through on her way past, stopping in to check on them.

“Not doing so well, hmm?” she asked, introducing herself as Doctor Michaels.

Jane shook her head, before crying out at the sudden movement.

The doctor looked at her chart.

“Painkillers not working?” she asked rhetorically. “Unfortunately I can’t give you anymore. This is an unprecedented treatment, and therefore I don’t want to give you any medication that could interfere. Opiate based painkillers are listed.”

Jane cracked her eyes open in reply. The pain in her head had escalated to a full blown migraine. She shied away from the lights, closing her eyes again to try and get a small moment's reprieve.

“Here.” the doctor said, dimming the lights. “The antiemetics seem to be working though?”

“Yes.” Jane managed to say. “I haven’t vomited in over an hour.”

“That’s good. Do you mind if I take a few obs?” she asked kindly. She took Jane’s silence as conformation, sticking her thermometer in her ear.

“Your temperature is starting to get a little higher than I would like.” Doctor Michaels worried. “I think we might need to try giving you a cool shower. It will be pretty uncomfortable, but we need to start trying to bring your fever down.”

Jane sighed. She was already in a lot of pain, her head feeling as if it was going to split open at any second, and now she had to get out of bed and have a cool shower? She couldn’t think of anything worse.

“You’re ok to help her with that?” the doctor asked Kurt. He nodded in affirmation, glad that she was happy for him to help her. He had been slightly worried that a nurse was going to have to come in. He knew Jane would be much more comfortable with it being him. “Don’t have the water too cold, just tepid. You’ll want her to stay under the water for at least five minutes. Once she’s back in bed, call a nurse to come and check her fever again.”

She disconnected Jane from the heart rate monitor and IV bag. They had been pumping her full of fluids since her arrival, her dehydration had been quite bad.

After giving her instructions, the doctor moved to leave. “Any problems, there’s a call button in the shower, press that and someone will come in immediately.”

When they were alone again, Kurt moved to the adjoining bathroom and turned the water on. He adjusted it to a lukewarm setting, wincing in sympathy. He knew how uncomfortable this was going to be for her. He stripped his own clothes, wrapping a towel around his waist, before moving to help his poor wife. He pulled the hospital gown over her head, before slowly helping her to her feet. The burning of her skin against his own had him feeling more concerned by the moment. He hoped the cool shower would help her feel better.

Jane groaned at the change of equilibrium, gravity sending sharp spikes of pain through her skull. Her stomach lurched when a wave of vertigo crashed down on her. She leaned heavily on her husband, the fever sapping the remaining energy that the pain hadn’t taken already.

He removed the towel from around his waist and stepped under the cool spray, jumping slightly as the water hit his skin. He slowly back into the shower, holding her close to his chest. He felt her tense when the tepid water hit her burning skin, the breath sucked out of her.

She grimaced in his arms, groaning as he moved the cool water onto her hair. He stroked her back softly, running his fingers up and down her shoulder blades that had long since erupted in goosebumps.

They stayed under the spray for more than five minutes, until chills wracked her small body.

“Kurt…” she whimpered uncharacteristically.

“Shhh…” he soothed, holding her close. “Just a few more minutes.”

He could still feel the burning of her skin. He needed to make sure that her temperature came down enough for this not to be a failed exercise. It was killing him to see her like this. He knew the chills would be torture on her rigid muscles.

He turned the shower off once her skin felt cooler, wrapping a towel around her shoulders. He quickly dried himself and donned a pair of boxers, before during her as best he could. He helped her back into the hospital gown before guiding her back to bed. Once he was dressed he called the bell for the nurse to come back and reconnect her to everything.

Jane continued to shiver, but she had to admit she felt marginally better. Her migraine had calmed down to a dull throb, her belly not so queasy.

The nurse took her temperature, noting that it had come down significantly. The cool shower seemed to have done the trick.

Kurt could see her fading quickly, the symptoms having left her completely spent.

“Get some sleep.” he murmured, tucking the light blanket over her chest.

“You’ll still be here when I wake?” she murmured, her eyes already falling shut.

Kurt reached out and took her hand, bringing it to her lips.

“Always.” he whispered. He watched her fall into a deep sleep, hoping that when she woke, that would be the end of her symptoms. He wanted to take her home… wherever home may be.

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Jane woke the next morning, feeling like a completely different person. Her chest and her muscles still ached, but she no longer felt the urge to throw her guts up, and she knew her fever was mostly back to normal. Her headache had improved, but her eyesight remained blurry.

“Hey.” she heard her husband whisper.

She broke out in a massive smile.

“Hey yourself.” she said happily.

“Why are you so cheery this morning?” he asked, amused. He could already see the change in her.

“I’m feeling so much better.” she replied. “I’m just feeling so relieved.”

She watched Kurt nod, could feel the elation pulsing from his body. They had gotten their second chance… or was this there third or fourth chance? Now they just had to decide what to do with it.

“What are you thinking?” he murmured quietly, sitting forward in his chair so she would be able to see him better.

“I’m thinking… about Colorado.” she whispered, feeling at peace.

“Yeah?” She could hear the smile in his voice.

“Yeah.”

“What about Colorado?” he asked, knowing that whatever had her this excited had to be good.

“I want to open up a foster home.” she admitted. “I just feel after everything we have been through… everything we both went through as children, we should make a safe space for those who need it most.”

Kurt responded by moving forward and kissing her softly on the forehead.

“I think that that is a brilliant idea.” he replied seriously. He chuckled softly. “Have I ever told you how remarkable you are?”

Jane smiled. “Maybe once or twice.”

He watched her smile disappear, her face falling to a soft frown.

“What’s the matter?” he asked, suddenly concerned.

After a moment's silence, Jane asked, “Kurt… what if my eyesight never properly comes back… the other symptoms have gone… why can’t I see properly?”

Kurt shrugged.

“Honestly… I’m not sure… but I do know one thing…”

“What’s that?”

“You would look incredibly sexy if you had to wear glasses.”

Jane grinned at him. He was right. At least blurred vision could be fixed. She was so thankful for this opportunity, that she was going to take it and run with it, knowing her husband would be at her side.

Always.

#blindspot #blindspot fanfic #badthingshappenbingo #jane doe #kurt weller #jeller #whump

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angst-king · 3 years ago

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Misery loves Company pt 2

Ito had become worried as her son had slept all day, it was six thirty now, she was making dinner. All day she’d been having a bad feeling about Eijirou, that what he was going through wouldn’t end well but. She shook this off and reminded herself that Eijirou was tough and that he’d be okay even with this nagging feeling in the pit of her stomach. Even though she knew Eijirou wouldn’t have much of an appetite, he needed to eat something, and soup was better than nothing. Putting some soup into a food thermos which could hold the perfect amount of food she knew Eijirou could stomach, she grabs a spoon and heads up to the teen’s room.

Coming up to his room, she could hear the muffled sound of coughing, thick wet coughing. Knocking on the door, she peers in and is confused as she sees Eijirou on the floor shaking and coughing next to his bed. “Eijirou? Sweetie, are you okay?” She asked as she set down the thermos and spoon onto the nightstand. “M-mom, h-help” Was all his raspy strained vocal cords could get out as he gasped and sputtered. She rushed down to the floor beside him and asked. “What's wrong baby? Why are you on the floor?” She pulled Eijirou close to her and he continued to shake. “S-so much p-pain momma, i-i can’t breathe-” He coughed hard and Ito grabbed the bucket just in time for him to vomit. When he’s able to talk about it he whimpers and grunts. “I-it feels like someone’s sitting on my chest, poking me with a taser and yanking on my bones, while I'm in the freezer section of the store.” This made Ito nervous, she quickly reached to feel Eijirou’s forehead and pulled it away just as fast. He’s burning up! It's like over the hours he’s just gotten worse! His coughing is getting longer and more frequent, and he’s in so much pain that he can hardly move on his own. He looks pale, very pale. Her alarm bells are ringing louder and louder as Eijirou is clinging to her with a weak grip. She can hear him struggling to breath, she can hear his wheezing and congested breaths, he’s panting. What she didn’t know was that while Eijirou was sleeping, he’d had a seizure, which was a reason for why he was so shaky, he also was cold. Well that was the bad fever talking but he felt cold nonetheless. Snatching the thermometer and uncasing it, she asked Eijirou to open his mouth. He's too weak to keep it in his mouth on his own so she has to hold it steady under the boy’s tongue for him. “ 39.4” Her eyes widened as his temperature went up two degrees! She needed to get him to the hospital, she knew he wouldn’t like it but she had to, this wasn’t something they could just let him sleep through.

“Eijirou sweetie, we need to go to the ER. I know you don’t like it but we have to.” She says moving with urgency and purpose, she picks him up and sets him on the bed and grabs what she needs. She knew they were gonna strip him of his pajamas and shoes there so she didn’t even bother to grab him shoes or socks. She grabbed his medical bag, the list of his medications and records, she went into her room and grabbed her phone, purse and keys. She put on shoes before coming back to carry Eijirou who wordlessly agreed to going to the ER. He only nodded when she said they were going to the hospital. His limbs loosely dangling, she did her best to not jostle him around as she took him to the car. Buckling him up she puts his medical bag in the back seat, her purse on the floor of the passenger seat and turns on the house alarm.

She’s impatient as the garage door takes its time opening itself up and she makes it a quick task to get out and close the door without staying in the driveway a second longer. She’s on the road, she’s not speeding but she’d definitely be using the speeding limit range to the fullest. Eijirou is coughing up a storm, luckily there are trash bags for instances like these. Ito was trying to keep calm, trying to keep her adrenaline from making decisions for her. It didn’t help that mid car ride Eijirou had another seizure, she knew how to handle those seeing as there wasn’t much she could do she kept an eye on him as she drove.

When she pulled into the ER parking lot, she swiftly found a spot and parked. Unlocking the car doors she gets out, grabs her purse and Eijirou’s bag from the back before getting Eijirou out of the car. “Come on hun, lets go'' She says trying to hide her worry in her voice even though Eijirou is half conscious. Shutting the door with her foot she is almost running with the boy in her arms. Dashing into the ER the doors open and she calls out “HELP I need help please!” A nurse comes over, all eyes are on them but Ito doesn’t care. “What’s wrong ma’am?” The nurse asked hustling over to her, Ito explained to her “My son has Cystic fibrosis, CIDP, and epilepsy and he’s been having a bit of a flare up for a week and he just got so much worse today. His fever is 102, he’s coughing more than usual, he can’t move there much on his own, and he says it feels like someone is sitting on his chest and pulling on his bones. He’s had two seizures today, and he’s barely alert. The nurse nods and calls for another nurse to grab a gurney. “Okay ma’am, what’s your son’s name and how old is he?” “His name is Kirishima Eijirou, and he’s14.” “Okay- set him on the gurney, we’ll take him to a bay room, follow us.” The gurney arrives and Ito places the boy on that, he’s a bit curled up still coughing and shaking hard. The other nurse takes the lead and pushes Eijirou to the bay area. Ito isn’t far behind the nurse she’d met with as they go down the hallways. The nurses grab a doctor and things get moving. Giving the doctor the run down after he introduces himself to Ito as Dr Shidori, the nurses are hooking Eijirou up to multiple wires, lines, and machines. While this is going on Ito is asked multiple questions about EIjirou like. “How long has he been having a flare up for?” “When did he start going down hill?” “has he eaten or consumed anything during his flare ups” “what medications and treatments is he on?” “Is he allergic to anything?” Ito didn’t have trouble answering their quickly asked questions as the staff moved like a well oiled machine.

Ito felt two different feelings tugging at her, wanting to stay with her son, and needing to leave him. She wanted to stay not knowing whether he’d live or, staying to keep her son calm and to let him know she hadn’t abandoned him but. She felt so out of place though with the rush of people around her, in a way feeling useless, able to do much of anything but stand there and watch and answer questions or give permission. She didn’t really know what to do about this, there were so many emotions running through her, anxiety, hope, hopelessness, sadness. Finally her answer was given to her when the room began to slow down and the doctor began to explain things. They allowed her to sit in the chair next to Eijirou's bedside. “Alright Mrs Kirishima, we’ve got some time to talk.” The doctor started, Ito nodded, brushing back her hair behind her ears. “First things first, Eijirou needs to be hospitalized, from what you’ve told me this isn’t the first time he would be hospitalized. The flare up he is having is proving that one, his stomach isn’t absorbing his food and that means he’s very vitamin, minerals and elementally deficient, which means his immune system is weak also. I’m sure you understand this right?” He asked before continuing, Ito nodded once more so the doctor kept going. “We can not do the same type of monitoring as an inpatient long stay hospital can. You know why and you know that places that you’ve taken Eijirou to before will be able to observe him, do better testing and care for him….Another reason I mention this is because cold and flu season is starting a little earlier than what I’ve expected and it would be safer for him to be admitted they get him all better before hand or see what needs to be done so we’re not just releasing him back out to get tens times worse to the point where it could be too late. We can do some of his breathing treatments and stuff here, but it won't be as efficient. I will have a nurse call in to the local children’s hospital, and they will get things sorted out from there.” Taking in a deep breath, Ito sighed “okay, when do you think he will be transferred?” “I will have a nurse call and will get right back to you with that answer” Ito could understand why the doctor didn’t have an answer for her on the spot and could appreciate his honesty. “Now about Eijirou, his body isn’t receiving or taking on the medications he’s being given and he’s not taking on food either but we will give him supplementary food seeing as first of all he might not have the energy to eat, second it will boost up his sugar wich he needs but for right now he’s getting everything through IVs. We’ve given him fever reducer, epileptic medication, we didn’t have the type that he is on right now but we have one that works for the majority of young patients his age. He’s also getting potassium which is another reason for his trembling, his muscles were so tense from lack of potassium. We gave him a mix of midazolam and vitamin D as well. We’re just here to monitor his condition and give him as much help as possible till he’s transferred.” Ito sighed for what felt like the millionth time, she hated having to have her son be hospitalized in a long stay facility but she knew it was gonna be good for him.

All she could do was nod, when the doctor left them be for the night in the ICU. She contemplated making a phone call, it was about ten pm now, much later and Ito was restless. She didn’t know if she should call Emily or not? The other definitely deserved to know but she didn’t know whether she should call her now. Maybe she should call when she’s got more information so she doesn’t have to call Emily twice? Why wait though? Eijirou just had a medical emergency, he could die tonight! Ito knew she wouldn’t be sleeping any easier if she didn’t at least try to call Emily. Grabbing her phone, she called her wife. She didn’t hope to hard for her wife to pick up. Knowing most of the time it was a varying range of hit or miss, and it was mainly miss.

A little shocked the woman had picked up, she smiles hearing Emily’s voice. “Hi babe, d’you call to say goodnight?” “u-um no actually, we need to talk….it's about Eijirou.” Ito’s voice trails and Emily can hear in her voice this isn’t good news at all. “O-okay, well I’m here, what’s wrong with Eijirou?” The military woman sighs, Ito explains to Emily that their son is getting sicker and is going to be admitted to a long stay hospital for a while to see if they can get him better. When Ito was done Emily spoke softly,“i-I’m sorry you have to go through this with him a-alone babe. I-I wish I could be there I really really do.” you could hear sympathy but also regret. There were many days and nights where Emily contemplated her career path. Why would she join the army when she had a chronically ill son at home!?! Why didn’t she stay to help? Why put all of this on poor Ito who took the job of being a parent and business woman just to go back to her home country and join the military?!

It seemed selfish but this was her dream. Emily from a young age wanted to carry on the legacy of going into the military for her family. She had the dedication and spirit for it and when opportunity struck she took it but. She contemplated her choices. It was a year after Eijirou was born when she started to really contemplate going into the military and was given the chance. Ito and her talked it over numerous nights and Ito supported her the entire way there when the decision was made. Emily knew she’d be leaving her wife and son behind eventually but they didn’t know what she’d be leaving Ito to deal with as Ejirou’s sickness didn’t show up completely until he was six. Emily had left a year before then and when Eijirou was first diagnosed with CF and epilepsy it broke her heart, especially since he would be hospitalized for a long stay for the first time. She knew that for both Ito and Eijirou that being hospitalized and not being able to see the other as frequently as they would’ve before can be a bit traumatic. Still Ito always reassured Emily that she didn’t have to give up on being in the military for them, that they were fine.

Ito could hear the regret in her wife’s voice and spoke gently. “Emi, you have nothing to be sorry for. I know that you always feel bad for leaving me with Eijirou but. We made this decision together, and I don’t ever want you to feel bad about this. This was inevitable once we found out Eijirou was chronically ill and sure things would be a bit easier if you were here but, we’re doing great. I know that you wish you could be here in person to support us but, we feel your support all the way from North america...We love you so much Emi, you’ll be able to facetime him, and who knows, maybe you might be able to see him in person.” “Th-thanks Ito, i-i….I just hope he gets better, or I’ll at least be able to see him soon...I miss you both so much.” her voice cracking at the end Ito could tell her lover was crying. It hurt her to hear the other so upset, and she could understand why the woman felt this way. “Hey babe, I’ll update you when I get more information okay….I love you” “Okay love, I love you too.” They hang up, Ito puts her phone into her purse and gets herself comfortable in the hospital so she could try and get some sleep.

In the morning a nurse came in to check on Eijirou as well as inform Ito about the long stay at the hospital. They discussed the hospital, about how long Eijirou would stay there and who they’d talk to about treatment plans. Truthfully Eijirou’s stay duration would depend on how his body responds to treatment and Ito knew this, this wasn’t new information so luckily the discussion wasn’t very long, Eijirou would be admitted in by tomorrow morning. The day was rather boring, calling her work to tell her about her son being hospitalized as a way of keeping them informed and ready for any random call off days. Since she had the time, she headed home and backed a two week stay bag of clothes and things she knew he could take with him to the hospital.

Conversations with doctors, filling out papers and making sure everyone was on the same page, Eijirou was soon transferred to Tokyo’s children's long stay hospital.

#chronically ill Kirishima #chronically ill BNHA au #no quirks #polyamourus pride

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rainoverthemountains · 5 years ago

Text

Twist Story chapter 4

As usual, Twist and all of Twistfell (and Swaptwistfell, which has a hint of relevance here if you know who Iggy’s major donor is) belongs to @itsladykit

Summary: There’s a cure for LV (probably). It’s completely safe (probably). It’s a highly unpleasant experience (definitely). Twist only cares about that first statement. He probably should have paid a little more attention to the other two. But what does it matter? He’s getting what he wants, and he has the best friends and family in any universe to help along the way.

chapter 1, chapter 3

Chapter 4

Twist groans as his sockets open and his eyelight lights. The brightness in the room is blinding so he quickly slams both sockets shut and brings an arm up to cover them with his sleeve. This is a lot more work than it should be, and does not produce the expected result. Bare bones are terrible at blocking out light.

“How drunk was I that I thought sleepin’ shirtless in a freezin’ room with no blankets was good idea?” he mutters, trying to lever himself up and out of the bed to search for some clothes. Trying, and failing, as a wave of dizziness washes over him at the movement and his arms won’t hold any weight.

“We’ll, fuck. Not sure this’s a hangover.” The headache that had been faintly pulsing in the back of his skull suddenly intensifies. ‘Er if it is, ‘s a hangover from hell.” He tries covering his eyes again, still to no effect. “C’n someone turn off that damn light?” No one answers.

He tries getting up again, this time by swinging his legs over the side of the bed. Pain flares in his ribcage as soon as he tries. “Shitshitshit, bad idea, fuck!” He ends up curled in a little ball, arms across his ribcage and legs drawn up as tightly as he can manage. He’s not sure how long it is before he manages to move again. He can only guess at what’s wrong.

Not drunk, or not only drunk. Was he in some kind of fight? Shit, was he?! What if he killed someone? What if he gained LV? He can’t have gained LV, he’d know if he had, surely he’d know, he’d feel it. And anyway, it would have healed him, and he’s definitely not healed, and he’s still sane enough to worry about it, so that can’t be what happened, it can’t, but then what did happen?

“‘m I sick?” The pain in his chest has receded enough to let him talk again, but something definitely isn’t right with his voice. It’s raspy and strained, like he was screaming, why does he remember screaming? And it’s dry, and oh stars he’s just realized how thirsty he is, and unless there’s some water right next to this bed, there’s no way he’s getting any. A quick glance through squinted sockets confirms that water is nowhere within reach. He’ll have to put that aside, then, for the probably more pressing problem of what happened and where he is.

His brief glimpse of the room suggests that it might be some kind of doctor’s office. He hasn’t spent much time in places like that, really doesn’t like them and can usually take care of any injury without needing to go to one, but it would make some sense based on whatever is wrong with his ribcage and skull. Which is probably something he should find out more about. His skull’s a little hard to examine by himself, but he should be able to get some idea of what’s happening with his ribcage if he can just get his eyes open long enough.

Bracing himself for the light, he squints his sockets open again. It’s just as bad as last time, but this time he’s prepared, so he manages to keep them open. His neck is stiff, but he gets it to bend enough that he can look at his ribcage. What he sees there is disturbing.

His soul is there, easily seen from the sickly yellow light it’s giving off. It’s missing a lot of the calcification that would normally cover it, which should make it look better but somehow just makes it look damaged. He looks away in disgust. Even without the calcification, it’s still ugly. Which, fine, he should have expected that. If he could fix his soul by peeling it like an orange, he’d have done it a long time ago, but what’s with the color? Last he checked, his magic was gold, not yellow, and definitely not that weird, pale yellow. His head falls back on the pillow before he can take a closer look. Everything aches, but more than that, absolute exhaustion is really getting to him. But he has to figure out what’s going on.

The best lead he has is his soul. Something is wrong with it, and maybe if he can figure out what’s wrong he can figure out what happened, or where he is, or how to get out of there. Sitting up’s not working, bending’s not working, but maybe he can bring his soul to eye level instead. He quickly learns that magic’s not working either, ow, shit, ow, so he reaches in to pull it out by hand, only to get his hand tangled in string.

“What the fuck?” he gasps. “Why’s there-” but he’s cut off by a coughing fit, which does nothing good for the string that’s apparently pulling on his soul. Not string, he realizes as he gets the coughing under control, wires. Wires sticking into his soul, and the other end connected to a machine a few feet away.

“Now this’s gettin’ creepy.” His eyes trail from the machine by his bed to the rest of the room, stopping on various equipment, some of which looks ridiculously modern next to tools that could have come out of some 19th century mad-scientist’s lab, and even what look like some kind medieval torture devices. He shivers at a creepy clamp thing with teeth without really knowing why it’s any worse than the things around it, before suddenly freezing as he realizes what all this means.

“A lab. ‘m in a lab!” Ice fills his marrow as he looks around with renewed awareness, noting the single exit, impossibly far away, the bars beside his bed, perfect for strapping in some unwilling research subject, though he’s not strapped in because why would they bother? It’s not like he’s going anywhere. He can’t even sit up, can’t even get these damn wires out of his soul, oh fuck get them out get them out get them out get them out, shit that hurts, but they’re out, they’re gone, nothing holding him in place anymore, this is his chance he has to leave has to get up has to…

“What is going on in there?” a voice demands from somewhere he can’t see. “You’d better be having a seizure or something because if you took those out on purpose and screwed up my readings I swear I’ll-”

The voice starts far away but ends up right on top of him. Who the fuck thinks she’s got a right to hold him here like this, thinks she can lock him away in a lab somewhere, doesn’t know who’s she’s messing with, a sharp bone right through her chest will take care of her. He starts to manifest one, and the world whites out in agony.

When he comes to, he’s still gasping, soul on fire, mana lines burning. He blinks up at the… lizard monster? standing over him, thinking he should probably know who she is, but not quite able to put together a coherent thought.

“Tried to use your magic, huh? Didn’t really work out the way you expected? I’d have warned you, but you decided to attack me as soon as I came in the room, so I didn’t really get a chance. You’re really not being a very cooperative research subject. The hard part was supposed to be before the injection. You really should be under better control now, so I expect better behavior.”

Research subject? Oh yeah, the lab, he’s in a lab, so she’s probably a scientist, and she’s calling him her research subject and telling him to behave. Only one response to that. “Fuck. You.” The effect is kind of ruined by the coughing fit that follows, though.

“Really? That’s how you’re going to talk to me? I’m curing your LV and putting up with all of your ridiculous behavior in the meantime, and all you have to say is fuck you? You should be thanking me!” Her rant is hard to follow as he struggles to get the coughing under control, but it seems like there might be something important in there.

“Thank? Why… wait. What?”

“I’m not repeating myself. You know what I’m talking about.”

“No, ya said…” he clenches his teeth, trying to hold off another coughing fit. She said something important, and besides, coughing hurts like a vice squeezing his soul, and he’d really rather not do it again. Water would be great, or maybe he should just stop talking. Nah, never gonna happen. “Said… LV.” A single cough escapes before he gets it back under control. “A cure? Ya said…” Any answer she might have given is lost as he loses control of the coughing fit he’s been fighting. It’s… not the worst thing he’s ever experienced, not by far, but pretty high on the scale of things that have happened lately, as his soul screams for air that he’s coughing too hard to take in, and he can’t get enough air to cough, but he has to cough, and his throat is burning and everything is burning and oh thank every fucking star, water, he has water! He gulps greedily, choking as he continues to cough but not caring as the cool peace of it soothes his throat and even his soul. He drinks until it’s gone, and by then the coughing has stopped and he can breathe, but he’s just so tired. He whimpers as the straw, apparently there was a straw, is removed from his mouth, but is too tired for further protest. Sleep, he just wants to sleep, but there’s something important, something he needs to ask about, something…

“LV?” he whispers. “Somethin’, said somethin’ ‘bout LV. What ya said…?” He can’t talk right, can barely form words, let alone put them in order, but he has to know.

“I’ve cured it.” She says it so matter-of-factly, like she’s not talking about changing his whole world.

“Really? An’ I… c’n have it?” It sounds familiar, but he has to know for sure.

“You already have it. This is it. It’s working in your soul right now. Did you forget?” She softens a little at that.

“Forget? Yeah, guess so.” A tiny spark of memory that he shudders away from, but still it grows, memory of his soul melting and parts ripped off and Muffet taking it, probably not Muffet, that was a long time ago, she’s not here, but it all feels like her so he’s not sure, and fading away and coming back, and it’s all rushing back now and he kind of wishes it wouldn’t.

“Do you remember now?” And now she sounds… encouraging? Is she mad at him or not? Can she just make up her mind? He can’t keep track of these shifts.

“‘member,” he agrees, and he does, kind of, but not enough to make sense of anything.

“Hmmm, temporary amnesia and ongoing confusion, pretty typical side effects, especially this early on. Is there anything else you can tell me? You weren’t in any condition to talk after the initial treatment.”

“‘bout what?”

“Your experience of the treatment! That was part of our agreement, remember, I give you the treatment early and you participate in my data collection so I can get this published and accepted for mass production.”

“Sucks.”

“What sucks?”

“Th’ tre’men’. Treat ment.” Too much work to makes the words come out clearly. He just wants to sleep.

“Really? That’s all you have to say about it?”

“‘s true.”

“Obviously, but I really need more detailed information. You wouldn’t believe how picky the review board is about these things. You’re going to have to give me more than that.”

“Sucks. ‘m tire. Gonna slee’ now.” There. Three, five, six? words. That’s as much as she’s getting.

“Hey, no, you can’t sleep yet! I’ve already let you get away with it once, but I can’t let you do it again. This whole thing is pointless if I can’t get any data out of it. Between not answering questions and not keeping those wires in, you’re being a pretty useless research subject. I need to get those wires back in, anyway, and don’t take them out again!”

“Mhm.” He doesn’t really care what she does. Sleep is calling, and he couldn’t fight it if he tried. He’s vaguely disturbed as he feels her reach into his ribcage, presumably to get his soul, but it’s not enough to keep him from much needed sleep.

***

Iggy is just plugging the last of the data from the monitor into the program that will analyze it and compare it to the data from her other subjects when she hears a crash from the lab. She rushes into the room, only to find Twist collapsed on the floor.

“What happened? Why are you on the floor?” Did he fall out of bed accidentally? She’s still not convinced seizures aren’t a possibility in his case, even if they haven’t been seen in other subjects. The alternative…

“Tryna go home,” he mutters.

The alternative is that he got out of bed on purpose, and, predictably, collapsed.

“Well obviously you can’t do that. How would you get there? You can’t even walk, and I’m not done monitoring the rest of the treatment,” she scolds as he blinks up at her in confusion.

“Rest? There’s more?” He sounds like the idea never occurred to him. At least he remembers that there is a treatment, this time.

“Of course, there’s more. Has your LV decreased? No, obviously not, so the treatment isn’t done, so you’re not going home.”

“Wanna go home. Sans… Blackberry. Blackberry’s waitin’.”

“No, he’s not. You told him you were going on vacation, remember?”

Twist snorts. “Not a v’cation. ‘s not.”

“Obviously not, but that’s what you told him. I sure hope this memory loss thing ends soon. How about we move on to a different side effect? This one’s getting old pretty fast.”

“I c’n pick my side effect? What kinda medicine does tha’? An’ where’s Blackberry?”

“Ugh, no, obviously I was just saying that because I was annoyed. Still, there are a lot of side effects to this and they can change frequently, and so far, memory loss is the most annoying. Now let’s get you off the floor. I’m really glad you’re a skeleton. You weigh, like, nothing for being so tall.” She reaches down to lift him up, only to freeze when he gasps. She quickly pulls back, concerned that she might have hurt him, only to realize that she hasn’t actually touched him. Even if she did, she certainly isn’t touching him now, and he’s still looking at her like some nightmare come to life.

“What is it? What’s wrong?” He’s just staring her, sockets hollow, expression still, and she has no idea what caused it. “Seriously, what’s wrong with you?” This question gets through, though it does nothing for the look of terror.

“Sorry. Sorry. ‘M sorry. ’ll do better. Sorry. Sorrysorrysorry. Sorry.” He doesn’t look particularly contrite, but he does look desperate. For what, she has no clue.

“Enough apologizing. You’ve been a terrible research subject, but you’re not actually doing anything wrong right now. Just let me put you in bed and everything will be fine.” She reaches again to pick him up, which brings the terror back in full force.

“Sorry! Sorrysorrym’sorry ‘m sorry ‘m sorry so sorry didn’ mean ta sorry!” Now he’s sobbing, without tears of course because his LV won’t allow that, and she still doesn’t know why. He’s not actually resisting, so she ultimately just picks him up anyway and puts him back on the bed. He’s shaking so hard that his bones rattle, and he won’t stop apologizing, even after she steps away from him.

“Hey, it’s ok. I’m not mad at you. Look, you’re back in bed! I fixed it. Everything’s fine.” Her reassurances have no effect.

“Sorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorrysorry.” His body is rigid now, except for the shaking. When she gently touches his arm, he flinches away before freezing again, and that’s when she realizes.

“A hallucination! Something I did triggered a hallucination, maybe with some kind of flashback, and now you’re stuck in it. Combine that with increased emotional instability due to alterations in the substructure of your soul, and of course you’ll have some reactions like this. Ok, that’s not so bad. I’ll just leave you alone to let it fade or play out, and then you’ll be fine. I’ll just be in my office. I’ll check on you in a little while.” Hallucinations are a common side effect, but they always go away on their own. She feels some sympathy for this one, it looks bad, but since there’s nothing she can do to help she might as well get some work done. She reattaches the monitor wires again, which he doesn’t seem to notice, then returns to the office, leaving rattling bones and terrified whimpers behind her.

***

Twist doesn’t know where he is. He thought he knew, and is glad to realize he isn’t there, but other than not there he has no idea. There’s a door somewhere over there, and he can’t see what’s through it but it seems like the best way out. He pulls himself to the edge of the bed with considerable effort, tries to roll to his feet, and collapses to the floor, agony shooting through every joint. For some indefinable amount of time, that’s all there is, but at some point, he hears a voice and feels someone shaking his arm.

“Hey, hey! Can you hear me? What are you doing out of bed?” The source of the voice is a yellow blur.

“Stop yellin’ an’ maybe I’ll answer ya,” he mutters at the blur. He knows that blur, and as the blur resolves into a familiar face he remembers where he is. “Damn, that’s annoyin’.”

“Well I wouldn’t have to yell at you if you hadn’t knocked yourself out by falling on the floor. When I say stay in bed, I mean it. You can’t walk. You also have wires in your soul that are attached to a stationary machine. How hard is that to understand?”

“Yer annoyin’ too, sweetheart, but I meant the forgettin’ what’s happenin’ thing.” He’d like to glare at her, but his eyes have gone from unfocused to over-focused somehow, everything distorted and magnified and too bright, and slightly nauseating.

“What, again? You’re having an unusual quantity of temporary amnesia. That will be inconvenient if it continues.”

“So sorry ta inconvenience ya, darlin’. Here I was havin’ a great time forgettin’ where I was an’ fallin’ on the floor every coupl’a hours, an’ not even realizin’ I was inconveniencin’ ya. I’ll make sure ta be more considerate in the future.”

“The memory loss wouldn’t be such a problem if you would just stay in bed. Why do you want to get up so badly? You have to feel terrible.”

“Ya sayin’ you’d stay put if ya woke up in some lab somewhere with no clue where ya were or why ya were there? Sorry fer not assumin’ whoever put me there has good intentions.”

“Strapping you to the bed would solve that problem.”

He glares. “No.”

“Oh, come on. I know you don’t like it, but how else are you going to stay in bed if you can’t even remember that you’re supposed to? It doesn’t even have to be chains; the way you are right now, we could probably get away with just some strips of cloth. It wouldn’t even be uncomfortable.”

“I said no.” What if she decides to do it anyway? He can’t stop her, can’t use magic, can’t even get to the door. She can do anything she wants to him; he’s helpless. Being helpless never goes well, people take advantage of that, make you helpless then they use you, then they-

“Hey, focus. You don’t need to freak out. I’m not strapping you to the bed. If I was going to then I already would have, with how you’ve been acting every time I try to help you.” Yellow again. Yellow Iggy. Not pink and black and lots of arms. This is Iggy. She’s here because she’s helping him. He chose this, and it’s worth it. It’s not even so bad, just a little pain, a little confusion, a little absolute terror nervousness, all completely worth it to get rid of his LV. He just needs to calm down and do what she tells him.

“That’s better. Are you back with me now? Let’s just get you back in bed.”

A good suggestion, and he’s only just decided to do as he’s told, but he really can’t help himself. He grins. “Ya keep sayin’ yer not in’erested, sweetheart, but then ya keep tryna get me in bed. So which is it?” A weak joke, but somehow he feels infinitely better for making it.

“Will you stop with the innuendo?! Just for that, you can get yourself back in bed,” she huffs.

“Fine, fine, I’ll cut it out an’ get in bed.” He’s still grinning as he struggles to roll over, the effort sending small spikes of pain through his joints but not dimming his mood. That’s as far as he gets, though, as his limbs won’t support him and pressure from trying to lift himself elevates the pain beyond what he can smile through.

“Think I… think ‘m gonna need some help.” He hates to admit it, but he’s not getting up anytime soon. Actually, maintaining this position might be more than he can manage for much longer, so he’s grateful when she sighs but leans down to lift him up. He’s not much help with getting himself in the bed or properly positioned, mostly trying to minimize the impact to joints that seem to have decided they don’t want him to move ever again.

“Wha’s wrong with me? ‘s like there’re spikes in my joints.”

“I don’t know. That’s not a common side effect. Maybe it’s due to the magic disruption and you being a skeleton. No one can use their magic during the treatment, but skeletons use magic to hold their bones together, which mainly occurs at the joints, so the magic in your joints is still present but easily disrupted.”

“Wait, does that mean my joints’ll come apart? If I can’t use magic and magic’s what holds me together, am I just gonna fall apart?”

“No, if that was going to happen, I think it already would have-”

“Ya think it already would’ve? Yer not sure? Don’t ya think that’s a risk I should’ve heard about before starting this?”

“Your magic isn’t gone, just damaged, so it still should be capable of primary survival functions. I didn’t warn you about it because I didn’t know it would happen. You’re the first skeleton subject I’ve had. That’s the risk you take when you participate in clinical trials, you may experience a side effect that hasn’t been discovered yet. This one really isn’t even that bad-”

“Unless my arms ‘n legs fall off.”

“You’ll just have to be careful about moving, and stop interrupting me. Now give me your soul.” While she spoke, she had retrieved the wires from where they’d fallen when they came loose when he fell out of bed, and now holds them in one hand while the other is held out expectantly for his soul. He gives it to her, knowing better than to resist by now, and looks away as she sticks both wires back in.

“Aren’t you glad I got all the calcification off so it’s mostly still clear? Imagine if I had to chip some more away each time you pulled these out. On the other hand, maybe that would motivate you to keep them in.”

“Not exactly pullin’ ‘em out on purpose, darlin’.” He scowls as she returns his soul. He knows this is annoying for her, but he’s not having a great time either, and he’s not sure what she thinks he can do about it.

“Just stop doing it. I’m going back to the office to try to get some work done. Stay. In. Bed. Do NOT remove those wires. If I have to come in here again because you did something stupid, I might reconsider what I said about strapping you to the bed.” And on that horrible note, she leaves him alone.

***

“Hey, Iggy?” She’s busy doing something with some equipment, but she’s always busy when she comes into the lab, so this is as good a time as any to ask.

“What?” That doesn’t mean she’ll be happy to be interrupted, though.

“Any chance I could get somethin’ ta eat? Think I’ve been here awhile, an’ I’m gettin’ kinda hungry.” He’s a lot more than kind of hungry, but sees no reason to let her know how much. At least not unless he has to.

“You’ve been here a day and a half, so I’m not surprised you’re hungry. I’m actually surprised you haven’t said anything before now.”

“Wasn’ hungry then. I am now. Can I have somethin’, please?” There, a little politeness never hurt.

“Sure, just let me finish with this and I’ll get you some food.” Well, that’s better than if he hadn’t asked at all, but you’d think she’d be a little faster about feeding someone at risk for magic depletion who hasn’t eaten in a day and a half.

Iggy finishes whatever it is she was doing and goes into her office. There are some sounds; packages tearing open, water running, utensils clinking, and then she returns with a covered cup with a straw sticking out the top.

“A smoothie?” Twist asks hopefully. He loves smoothies.

“Kind of, but not quite. It’s mostly protein and concentrated calories. You’ll have trouble digesting anything complicated, and you’re probably going to have trouble eating anything that takes a lot of chewing, and if you swallow wrong, you’ll choke on it, so this way you still get all the nutrients you need just from drinking. It’ll help keep your HP up.”

“Protein and calories, huh? Sounds great. Let’s give it a try.” It certainly doesn’t smell great, and it tastes exactly like it smells. He grimaces, but he’s hungry, so he drinks some anyway. “No chance of makin’ this taste any better, is there?”

“I guess I could add some sugar.”

He grimaces. “No thanks. Last thing this needs is ta be sweet on top’a whatever else it is.” There really is no way to describe that taste. It’s just awful.

“Fruit, maybe? You said you liked smoothies.” Well isn’t she just being remarkably helpful today? Looks like cooperating with drinking her nasty smoothie might pay off.

“That’d be great, sweetheart. Don’t know if it’d totally fix the taste, but it’d make it a lot easier ta drink.”

“Ok, give it here. I’ve got a blender in the office, and I think I have some bananas I can mix in. But you drink the whole thing, understand? I’m not going to this much trouble just so you can take a few sips and decide you don’t like it.”

“Got it. You add bananas and I drink it all.” Honestly, he’d probably drink it all without the fruit, nasty as it is. He’s hungry, and talking about food is just making it worse.

She doesn’t take long to return with the modified smoothie. It’s better than it was before, even if nothing can quite cover up that taste. At first, he drinks it vigorously, but drinking is more work than it should be as his magic struggles to dissolve the food. It gets harder to coordinate drinking and breathing as he runs out of energy, so he keeps running out of breath and occasionally choking. He believes Iggy now about solid food being a bad idea. He makes it through the whole cup but he’s exhausted. He holds onto the cup long enough for Iggy to take it from him but passes out as soon as he no longer has a task keeping him awake.

***

They start to develop something like a routine, even though it’s only been a couple of days. Iggy checks his monitor, brings him terrible smoothies, and works in her office. Twist lies in bed, alternately confused, afraid, and bored. He’s very bored, so bored that he briefly considers risking Iggy’s anger by trying to get out of bed again. Not worth it don’t disobey you know what that gets you He really doesn’t feel too bad as long as he doesn’t move, except for all the random flashbacks that get triggered by absolutely everything and the inability to remember where and when he is, so maybe he’s starting to get better. Maybe it’s almost over and he can go home. It’s a little concerning that he hasn’t seen any change in his LV yet, but maybe it takes a while for the change to show up. Maybe that’s what Iggy meant when she said it could take days or weeks. Still, Iggy doesn’t act like it’s almost over. In fact, Iggy acts like whatever she’s reading from his monitor is weird. She keeps watching him like she expects something to happen. She seems irritated that whatever it is keeps not happening.

It’s late in the third day of treatment when Twist finally finds out what Iggy has been waiting for. He’s just finished dinner, and is happily using the little energy he has left to complain about the food. Iggy cooks about as well as he does, if those smoothies are any proof, and he’s happy to tell her so. Iggy is ignoring him, as she tends to do.

When it begins, he thinks he’s just having trouble digesting dinner. It really is getting annoying to have so much trouble with basic things. Then he notices how hot everything feels.

“Why’s it so hot in here?” Iggy ignores this complaint like she has all the others. She’s doing something with the monitor and doesn’t turn away from her work. Twist realizes he’s started sweating. “Seriously, ‘m meltin’, here. Turn the heat down.” This time Iggy turns to look at him.

“It’s not any hotter than it was before. Are you feeling hot?” She sounds kind of excited, which is a weird reaction.

“Really hot. Too hot. Reminds me a when this started, with that first injection.” He doesn’t want to think about that, has been trying hard not to think about it, in fact, but now that he’s thought of it, he can’t stop thinking of it. This really does feel like a lighter version of how that felt. The heat is even centered in his soul like it was then. “‘m hot.” He might have whimpered. He’s not sure. He’s just too hot to care, and something’s happening with his soul. Something that feels a lot like that hellish first treatment, something that’s seeming more and more like it with each passing second, something-

Something in his soul flares white hot, and he screams. It’s like acid, or his soul shattering, and he doesn’t know what’s happening, but then he doesn’t care what’s happening, just wants it to stop, and claws at his ribs, desperate to get to the source of the pain, and he knows that doesn’t help, knows it only adds more pain, and what’s he going to do, rip out his own soul? So he pulls his arms in towards his chest, pulls his legs in too, and now he’s curled up in a tight little ball but it’s so hot, joints are hot and soul is melting, not supposed to melt she said he wouldn’t melt! He doesn’t want to melt, wants to go home! Go home, fight it, fight what?! There’s nothing to fight, just pain and heat and please make it stop. Pleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease and he can’t breathe doesn’t want to breathe breathing hurts everything hurts can’t breathe something on his face can’t breathe! Touching him someone’s touching him hands on his skull moving his skull, air! He gasps in relief as air rushes to his soul, then screams as it reignites the burning. Can’t breathe it hurts, have to breathe. So hot, breathe through it, just keep breathing but why if he’s melting? Doesn’t want to melt, she said he wouldn’t melt! Cold, needs something cold to stop melting, get up, find cold, can’t! She said he wouldn’t melt! Where is she, please make it stop!

“Help.” It might be scream or it might be a whisper. Either way, it rips out of his throat, and now that hurts too, but it gets a response. She’s here!

“Hey, hey, it’s ok. You’ll be ok. This is all perfectly normal. It just means the medicine’s hit a fairly large LV concentration, or maybe even a node, which means it’s finally doing its job. I was wondering when it would. It usually doesn’t take this long. I wonder if it’s proportional to the increase in overall treatment time? That would be useful to know.” It’s mostly a blur of sounds to Twist, but somewhere in there seems to be a reassurance, something about this being normal. Maybe he’s not melting? Then what’s happening? The pain spikes again, and he didn’t know it could get higher, but somehow it has, and then he doesn’t have any more thoughts for a while as it crests and crests again.

This time when the world comes back into focus, he knows where he is and why he’s there, and it doesn’t help at all. He’s shaking. He doesn’t know why he’s shaking, can’t really even feel it, but he hears his bones rattling so he knows he’s shaking. It’s dark, so maybe it’s late, or maybe his eyes are closed, so he tries to open them, and yes, they were closed, and it was better that way because this place is blinding. He closes them again, but not before glimpsing the yellow blur that’s become much too familiar these past few days.

“Hey, are you awake? How are you doing? That looked like a pretty bad one, not as bad as the first one because your HP didn’t drop too much; you’ll probably need to eat something soon but you didn’t even need an infusion, so it wasn’t too bad, although I guess it probably seemed pretty bad to you, so how are you doing now?” She talks a lot. None of it seems helpful. Maybe he should ask.

“Was… at?” That didn’t work, and now his throat hurts again.

“What? You’re not making any sense. Are you thirsty? I’ll get you some water.” She disappears for… a while, he doesn’t really know, and then there’s a straw between his teeth. He drinks it, and apparently he was thirsty because once he starts he can’t stop, and drinks until the cup is dry. He wants more, he thinks he wants more, but he’s tired, so tired. Maybe he’ll sleep, but… Wait, no don’t sleep. What happened? He needs to know what happened. What if it happens again? How can he stop it from happening again? He doesn’t notice his breathing speeding up until he’s hyperventilating, and he didn’t have enough air to begin with so now everything is spinning, and he’s still too hot and fuck is it happening again nonononono.

“Hey, you’re ok, you’re ok, just calm down. It’s over for now, just relax. You need to relax and recover. You’ll be ok.”

Ok. She said he’ll be ok. She said it’s over, she said it, it’s over. No, she said over for now. For now! That means it’s coming back. It’s not over, not over never over it’s coming back he’ll be here forever, can never go home and he’ll burn until he melts, won’t ever OW.

“Are you listening? Listen I said you’re ok! Calm down. Just breathe, jeez.” She shook him! Fuck that hurts. But it breaks him out of the panic too, and now he can process what she’s saying. Calm down. He needs to calm down. Breathe. Breathe slowly. That’s not slow! That’s faster, that’s worse, he’s not listening not listening too fast can’t breathe can’t see it’s dark can’t breathe can’t- He passes out.

***

It must not be long before he wakes up, because she’s still sitting by his bed. He’s calmer now, almost lethargic, and slowly blinks up at her until she notices that he’s awake.

“Oh good, you’re back. And calmer now, too. I was starting to wonder if you were ever going to calm down. I was seriously considering tranquilizer options if you were still panicking that much when you woke up, but I really want to avoid that because I don’t know whether it could interfere with the treatment. But it’s not necessary because you’re awake! How are you feeling?”

Does that require an answer? It seems obvious. He has a better question. “What happened?”

“You passed out after that attack. I’d say that one was definitely a node. Nodes are the worst, so if that wasn’t a node, I’d hate to see what an actual node would look like for you. I can’t totally rule that out, because I really don’t know enough about high LV in mentally intact monsters, so we’ll have to wait and see, but I’d really be surprised if that wasn’t a node.

“Wha’s a node?”

“Hmm? Oh, you know, an LV node.”

“Wha’s a LV node?” Is she going to start making sense at some point? There’s clearly something he needs to know here, but he has no clue what it is.

“Don’t you know how LV works?” She seems genuinely baffled.

“I know where it’s from an’,” he pauses to breathe, “an’ what it does, but,” another pause for breath, “nothin’ else.” What else is he supposed to know about it? If he’d realized he’d have to play twenty questions to find out what happened, he might have waited a while.

“I guess most people don’t actually know much about it. When you study something as much as I’ve studied LV in the past few years, you tend to forget what the general public does and doesn’t know.

“Basically, LV exists as a semi-physical part of the soul, with varying concentrations of each level dispersed throughout loosely interconnected networks. When your soul hurts, that’s the medicine dissolving various parts of the physical and magical components of LV. I’ve made it pretty specific to minimize damage to the surrounding areas, but with everything so connected in there, it’s impossible to avoid it completely. That’s where the side effects come from, including the mental and emotional ones since souls don’t really have any separation between the physical, mental, emotional, and magical. When the pain spikes, that means the medicine has hit a particularly high concentration of LV. When it gets to a node in the network, it actually connects to all the LV of that level in your soul at once, which affects the whole network, causing ‘attacks’ like the one you just experienced. Sorry, I don’t think that’s a great name for them, but it’s the best I’ve come up with so far. I’m open to suggestions. Anyway, what that means is that, as horrible as I’m sure that was, it was actually a really good thing because it means the medicine dissolved a node, which is great progress!”

“How many nodes?”

“Just one, I’m sure. They’re not right next to each other, which is good because can you imagine dissolving several at once? I bet that could break someone’s mind!”

“No, how many nodes are there?” If she could sound a little less enthusiastic about the idea of his mind breaking, that would be great.

“I don’t actually know, sorry. There are no definite patterns, and I think they can even shift a little. There are definitely a lot, especially with high LV like yours. We’ve still got a long way to go. But progress is progress, right?”

“Yeah.” Progress is progress. They’re making progress, small as it is relative to the whole awful thing. He’s not going to think about more of those attack things. He’s not going to think about being here for some indefinite amount of time, pretty much alone, living in dread of when the next one will come. He’s not. Instead, focus on progress.

He’s getting closer to life without LV. His whole life, spent as close as he wants to be to everyone he loves, with time to do everything he ever wished he could do and no reason to be afraid of himself ever again. He can barely imagine it. It’s too much.

It doesn’t seem real, here in a lab with his soul burning, barely able to remember where he is and with old memories always threatening to overtake his mind, but if this works, it will be real. Everything he never let himself wish for will be real. That’s why it’s worth it. Whatever happens, he has to remember it’s worth it. He just wants to go home, but going home without LV is worth waiting for. It is. It doesn’t seem like it now, miserable and terrified of the next attack, but it’ll be worth it. It will be.

***

Twist drifted off into some kind of daydream after Iggy’s more thorough explanation of the LV treatment, so Iggy returns to her office for more data analysis. The monitor wires actually stayed in during the attack, which is a minor miracle given the way he was scratching up his ribs. She really needs to find a way to stop him from messing with them, and to stop him from injuring himself now that the medicine has started reaching nodes. She’s tried to respect his wishes to not be restrained, but it’s getting impractical and he’s not being reasonable about it. No one likes having their movement restricted, but all he’s doing is messing up her data and hurting himself. He really does seem upset whenever she mentions it, though, so she’ll wait a little longer to see how he does. At least he doesn’t seem to be attacking her anymore.

She’s actually pretty pleased with the results so far, despite the gaps in the data and the complete lack of any meaningful subjective report. She certainly has enough to start her weekly report to the major donor who is making all of this work possible. She doesn’t know who they are, but she’s sure they’ll be pleased with her progress.

A subject who meets the criteria set by the review board has been found. Subject is a male skeleton with LV of 17. Subject consented to all treatment and was given the initial injection with minimal complications (i.e. HP loss requiring correction with direct magic infusion, distress). Subject is currently under observation in the lab. Side effects are managed effectively and HP is being monitored. The initial node was reached 56 hours after the initial injection, suggesting an extended treatment time relative to other subjects. Progress will continue to be monitored.

She considers sending the report early, but that seems a little excessive. As exciting as this is, she’ll have better data by the end of the week, so there’s really no reason to jump ahead of herself. It’s so exciting, though. Twist really could be the key to getting the treatment approved for mass distribution. She’s sure the donor will be thrilled.

chapter 5

#twistfell papyrus #twistfell alphys #medical experiments #soul manipulation #temporary amnesia #past trauma #flashbacks #panic attacks

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silly-nonny-fics-are-for-fandoms · 6 years ago

Text

Never again

Bakukami week day five (Part two) : Coffee @officialbakukamiweek Summary: What happens when Kaminari has three cups of the most caffeinated coffee teenagers could get their hands on? Read on Ao3

Everyone knew that living in the dorms without supervision would lead to something bad happening, eventually. They expected someone's quirk to go crazy, or even for something to catch fire.

No, the first thing to really go wrong, where someone had to go for a serious issue to recovery girl, was the fault of Kaminari and his friends. Someone had left the Death Wish coffee out, and of course, no one could have predicted that Kaminari would drink three cups of it to keep himself awake enough to study for their test on Monday.

Especially not Bakugo, who had been out until the late hours studying, since his dorm was far too loud to get anything done, then spent another two hours going over his work in the common room. Fuck Weekends.

Walking into his dorm room, he collapsed on his bed and nearly fell asleep, until he heard from the darkness,

"Welcome back."

Bakugo responded by sending a rather large explosion their way, eyes wide and panic rushing through his mind. He almost screamed. Almost. It was two in the morning; only one person in the dorms had the right to be in his room at this time and it was him.

The light from the explosion illuminated the figure of who was in there with him, showing Kaminari sitting on his desk chair with a Pichu plushie on his lap along with his charger.

"What the fuck are you doing here?! I almost blew your face off!" Bakugo snarled, trying not to yell since Kirishima was right next door.

"Katsu," Kaminari said, voice full of awe as little shocks came from around his eyes, lighting up the room, "Did you know that explosions generate electricity?"

"Why the fuck are you still awake?!"

"Did you know electricity was used to discover the pleasure center of the brain? It causes really intense orgasms, apparently."

"What the hell has gotten into you?" He hissed, "Either go the fuck to sleep or get the fuck out!"

"I've had three big cups of Death Wish coffee tonight," Kaminari said, Bakugo's eyes widening in horror.

Death Wish Coffee had six hundred milligrams of caffeine in a single cup, and four hundred milligrams was around enough to start causing medical issues. It's why it was called 'Death Wish' after all.

"I'm pretty sure this laptop is tethering me to my physical body, Katsu. I also think I can remotely access electronics; I've charged Kiri's phone, his laptop, and I've already hacked into Shoji's phone and I'm not even in their rooms. As interesting as that is conceptually... I think now," He paused, his voice coming to an eerie whine as the electricity surrounding him flared up, his hair floating and the water from the cup Bakugo had left on his desk was immediately drawn to him, out of the cup as the pull got stronger, "Is a good time for medical intervention!"

"Oh damn," Bakugo groaned, sitting up, "C'mon, we're gonna fucking get you help."

"Katsuuu-" Kaminari whined, "Hurtz."

"Shit." He heard the laptop clatter to the ground, Kaminari falling to the ground as his body went rigid, hitting his head on the desk and floor on his way down. Bakugo was quick to react, picking up the blonde and walking out of his room, over to Kirishima's as the waves of electricity pulsed through him, muscles twitching and stinging. He kicked at the door, yelling, "Oi! Shitty hair! Wake the fuck up I think Denki's gonna fucking die!"

He could hear the rustling, leaning Kaminari against the wall as the lightning blonde started twitching, giggling wildly and whining, trying to reach up to cradle his head.

The door creaked open, Kirishima mumbling, "What the hell, man? It's super la-" His eyes widened when he saw Kaminari on the floor, Bakugo kneeling down next to him, yellow jolts coming dangerously close to him. A zap from Kaminari was never comfortable, could easily be deadly, so Kirishima hardened his body as quickly as he could, kneeling down and feeling the tingle across his rock-like skin as he picked the energetic one up.

"Okay, we gotta get him some help." Kirishima said, "What's our plan, bro?"

"I'm calling Aizawa, I need you to fucking make sure he doesn't die while I do that!"

They made their way downstairs as fast as they could, Kaminari's electricity turning on all the lights on their way and likely waking up multiple students until they got to the main floor. In the kitchen was a landline, a direct connection to the teachers in case of an emergency.

"Hello, what seems to be your issue?" Said a robotic voice, Bakugo saying as calmly as he could,

"We need Aizawa or Recovery girl. Immediately." He'd learned that swearing to the stupid bots would get him nowhere, the same with yelling.

"You're being transferred to their personal line." It said, and Bakugo heard the television turn on and off, lights flickering wildly as the electronics in the kitchen went on the fritz. The fridge door slammed open and shut, microwave beeping and oven flashing, sink turning on and off again and again. He assumed the baths and laundry rooms would be in a similar state. It looked like a ghost movie.

"How's Denki?!" Bakugo yelled to Kirishima, who was keeping Kaminari close in the living room, Kaminari's whole body twitching and his eyes rolling into the back of his head, breath coming in tiny, jerking short breaths with wheezing.

"I. I don't know! He's freaking out, man!"

"Lay him on his side, he needs to breathe!"

"What's going on?" Aizawa's voice came through the phone, tired as usual.

"Denki's freaking the fuck out! He had three cups of Death Wish Coffee and he might be fucking dying!"

"I'll be right over; What's he like at the moment?"

Thank God Aizawa was calm since neither of the teenagers was, not really.

"Kirishima!"

"H-He's. He's barely breathing! It looks like he's been electrocuted in those movies, I. He's." Tears came to Kirishima's eyes, doing all he could to keep Kaminari safe on the carpet away from any sharp objects or furniture. He was the only one who could touch him.

Bakugo relayed the message to Aizawa, who was on his way to their dorm as fast as he could.

"He may be having a seizure, Bakugo. Caffeine overdose can have that effect, and it's common in electric quirk users to have them when they ingest caffeine. How long has he been having the seizure?"

"A few minutes," He glanced at the wall clock, and it had only been twenty minutes since he headed up to his dorm. "About ten."

"Did he hit his head on anything?"

"Yeah, my desk and the fucking floor!"

"It'll be okay, Bakugo," He recognized what his teacher was doing; saying it would be okay to calm his nerves and to hide the severity of the situation from him, "Have Kirishima check his pulse. I'm almost there."

Kirishima did as he was told, feeling the fast beating of his friend's pulse under his fingers. The tears started falling as blood spilled out of Kaminari's gasping mouth.

The front door slammed open, Aizawa in the doorway as he rushed over, checking Kaminari for injuries before sighing.

"What's fucking wrong with him?!" Bakugo yelled, hanging up the phone and going over, hands shaking.

"He's going to be alright, you two. He's having a seizure. Long seizures are dangerous, but it might be because he hit his head. I'll stay here for a bit longer, and if he doesn't stop, then I'll take him to get help. How much caffeine did he ingest?"

He activated his quirk, and the lights finally settled down along with the rest of the electronics, Kirishima's quirk also getting deactivated. Though, if it was voluntary or not was another story.

"It's like," Kirishima started, but Bakugo cut him off.

"It's six hundred and thirty milligrams, and he had three. That's eighteen hundred ninety milligrams; more than enough to fucking kill him."

"Alright. I'll take it from here, go back to bed." Aizawa said, Bakugo yelling in response.

"Fuck that! I'm staying here!"

"Me too!"

"Go. To. Bed. There's nothing you can do for him at the moment. We can't do anything until he's stopped seizing, then he has to get to the medical office, so we can make sure he didn't get brain damage. You'll learn to use the equipment in second year, so go to bed for now. He's going to be alright."

So, they obeyed, worried for their friend in very different ways.

When morning came, the class had been made aware of what happened, and why the lights had gone as odd as they had that night.

"He's fine, now. But he took a long time to stop seizing up, and he's been placed on medical watch for now. Apparently, this isn't his first time in this situation. He's in the medical office."

They'd also learned the difference between the nurse's staton and the medical office. One, far less equipped, was in the school building while the other was in the sports arena, with all the medical tools one could need. A mini hospital.

Kaminari would be able to come back once they were sure he was alright, which wouldn't take that long, Aizawa assured. He'd be back by the time classes started on Monday. Shoji and Kirishima reported their electronic devices well and truly hacked into, as well as fully charged and optimized.

And when Kaminari did return, he'd been placed on a strict caffeine and sugar ban for obvious reasons. Kirishima had hugged him, refusing to let him go for nearly an hour after the traumatic experience. Bakugo was mad, considering he knew what could've happened and yet, he did it anyway.

Bakugo had seen to it himself that the coffee was locked away, to be used by anyone other than Kaminari in moderation. He didn't want to think about the idea of that happy smile twisted into pained grimaces, gentle hands twitching and his body jerking around like a livewire. He didn't know what made him so emotional over something like this. He shouldn't be this angry over an accident.

"If you ever fucking try that shit again," He'd hissed to Kaminari, "I'll not only kick your ass hard enough to make you wish you’d never been born, I'll fucking kill you. Do you understand, idiot?"

Kaminari had grinned his heartstopping grin, and Bakugo knew he would actually have to hold himself to that threat. If something took that smile from his life, he didn't know what he'd do.

#Bakukamiweek2018 #Bakukami #Bakugo Katsuki #Kaminari Denki #Kirishima Eijirou #aizawa shouta #Coffee #Seizures #Ask to tag I'm shit at it #angst

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incurableoptimistest1994 · 3 years ago

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Today was a good day. It’s the type of day that makes me completely, utterly glad to be alive. The last few months have been hard. I had several really good, really well (by my standards 😂) months, only to come craving back down to reality and have a respiratory deterioration, a nasty chest infection, and an awful kidney infection. I’m now battling things like a post infection autoimmune flare, fatigue, pain and nausea. I get a lot more breathless and my heart has to work a bit harder. I’ve had days where I’ve been so exhausted by the simple act of living in this body that I’ve sat at the kitchen table and cried in frustration. Other days I just hid in bed or on the sofa, under several blankets. But today, even though I slept in so late my family had to check I was still alive (I wish I was joking 😂), I got myself up and went swimming. I had a pot of tea and a coffee. I helped mum buy a new storage unit. I saw my friend Hanna. And I got dressed up and went out for an incredible Chinese with some of my favourite people to celebrate a birthday. Yes, I had a seizure when I was out, yes I had pain, and yes I wet myself. But I had the best time laughing, catching up, and eating yummy food and drinking a very strong gin with people I adore. We do not need our days to hold big adventures and landmark moments for those days to be special. Every day I get is a wonder. But I’m especially grateful for the good days, that make all the bad ones worry enduring. #todaywasagoodday❤️ #palliativecarewarrior https://www.instagram.com/p/CVjMhY-N28u/?utm_medium=tumblr

#todaywasagoodday❤️#palliativecarewarrior

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chronicallypainful · 7 years ago

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Something that helps me: Magnesium supplementation

As always, please remember that everyone's body is different. I'm talking about something that has been helpful for me so that you can look into it if you want. I'm not trying to suggest that this will work for everyone or that everyone can or should try it.

Last semester, around November, I had a really bad flare. My pain levels were really high, especially around my neck and shoulders. Doing anything with my hands made my shoulder pain even more severe. And I was exhausted. Despite plenty of sleep, I only wanted to sleep more.

Basically, all I could do without increasing my pain was watch videos and read. So, yeah, I binge-watched some streaming television, but there is only so much of that I can take without getting really antsy. So I started reading, trying to see if there was anything else I could try to improve my health. And I came across magnesium.

Here's the scoop. What types of conditions might this help? Mainly fibromyalgia and fibromyalgia-like conditions. Many types of chronic pain have a fibromyalgia -like component, so this might be worth investigating for anyone with chronic pain. There is also evidence that magnesium improves sleep quality, so folks with sleep disorders and/or issues with fatigue might want to look into it as well. (I have a fibromyalgia-type pain disorder and a tangled mess of sleep issues.)

What is magnesium?

Magnesium is a naturally-occurring mineral. It is found in many foods, including fruits, vegetables, legumes, and meats. Some of the best natural sources are almonds, cashews, peanuts, soybeans, and spinach (cooked). Magnesium is an essential nutrient, meaning that humans must consume it in the diet to remain healthy.

Magnesium is an electrolyte, meaning that it exists as a charged ion when dissolved in water. Magnesium plays important roles in allowing nerve cells to pass messages and muscle cells to contract and relax. In muscles, magnesium is crucial for allowing muscles to relax after they contract. As an electrolyte, magnesium also plays a role in osmotic regulation (regulating the amount of water in your body). Magnesium is also crucial part of many enzymes, where it facilitates many of the chemical reactions essential for normal metabolism.

Why might people with chronic pain (or other conditions) need to supplement?

To be honest, this question doesn't have a good answer right now. There is some evidence that the amount of magnesium in our food is decreasing due to modern farming practices. There is also some evidence that physiological stress (including pain) can increase the need for magnesium. But both of those statements are based on limited evidence, and neither provides a complete picture.

How can I supplement magnesium?

Listen up, this is important. If you're trying to increase your magnesium intake, you don't want just any old supplement.

Okay, here we go. The most common way to supplement magnesium is with a dietary supplement. Many of these are not well absorbed, however. The type of magnesium compound makes a big difference. Please do your own research here, but I will outline the basics. Magnesium oxide is a very common compound used in supplements, but it is not very bioavailable, meaning that most of it is never absorbed. Magnesium sulfate suffers from similar problems. There are small studies suggesting that magnesium aspertate, magnesium citrate, magnesium lactate, and magnesium chloride are all better options.

I have been taking a brand called Natural Calm. It comes as a powder that you mix into hot water to make a fruity tea-like beverage. The advantage to this form is that you are actually consuming ionic magnesium, which can be easily absorbed in the small intestine. Be aware that the flavored forms of Natural Calm do use Stevia as a sweetener. Unflavored forms are also available from the same company. All I can really say is that it has been helpful for me.

Another option is to go through the skin. Magnesium is naturally absorbed through the skin in moist environments. (Evolutionarily speaking, think the ocean or hot springs.) If you have a bathtub and some time, Epson salts in a hot bath or a way to get a dose of magnesium while relaxing your mind and muscles. Some people advise making a magnesium "oil" by dissolving a high concentration of magnesium in water. Once it cools, they suggest spraying this on your skin. I tried this, and I don't recommend it. First of all, most recipes have you ending up with a supersaturated solution, meaning that it contains more magnesium than water can normally hold it room temperature. That means that, as the solution sits in the spray bottle the magnesium will start to crystallize in the water, and this has a very good chance of clogging your spray bottle. Second, your skin can only absorb the magnesium while it is in solution. This means that you need to keep your skin wet for an extended period of time while the magnesium is absorbed. So you're either constantly spraying your skin with more water, or wrapping yourself up with damp towels, both of which get really cold. Or else maybe you are hanging out in a steamy bathroom, which at least is pleasant, but at that point you should probably just be taking a bath. When the water finally does evaporate from your skin (or your towels), you'll be left with a fine white powder. This is harmless; it's basically just a really fine crystals of Epson salt, but it makes a big mess. As a third option, there are some lotions formulated to contain magnesium. I haven't tried these, so I can't speak to it personally. Just remember that your skin has to stay moist in order to absorb the mineral.

Can I test for magnesium deficiency?

Well, the short answer is not really.

The long answer has two parts. First, true magnesium deficiency is extremely rare. True deficiency happens when your nerves and muscles don't have enough magnesium to function properly, and it has severe consequences, like numbness, tingling, muscle contractions and cramps, seizures, abnormal heart rhythms, and disruption of the balance of other electrolytes (like calcium and potassium). Like I said, this is extremely rare, occurring mostly as a consequence of chronic alcoholism and certain metabolic disorders. Anyone having these type of symptoms needs to see a doctor immediately. Hopefully that's obvious.

What we are really talking about is magnesium inadequacy, which just means that you have enough magnesium to perform essential functions, but not enough for your body to operate optimally. Medical science recognizes that gastrointestinal diseases, type II diabetes, chronic alcoholism, and certain medications can increase the risk of magnesium inadequacy. The involvement of magnesium in chronic pain is less well studied, but the limited evidence we have that stay that people with chronic pain may have magnesium inadequacy, as well.

Most of the magnesium in your body is found inside your cells, primarily muscle and nerve cells. There are blood tests that can check for the level of magnesium in your blood, but less than 1% of the magnesium in your body is actually found in the serum of your blood. So there is good reason to doubt whether the results of such a test are meaningful. This means that, at present, attempting to test for magnesium levels is probably not helpful (unless you are experiencing severe symptoms). Instead, since magnesium supplementation is generally safe (when taken according to package directions), for most people it is probably more helpful to simply try a supplement and see if symptoms improve.

Please do be aware that certain medications can interact with magnesium, and these medications should not be taken at the same time as a magnesium supplement. Some common classes of medications that can interact with magnesium include bisphosphates, antibiotics, diuretics, and proton pump inhibitors. Please look up the specific medications you are taking and ask your pharmacist or doctor if you have any questions about the safety of adding a magnesium supplement.

Okay, that's the basic science. Back to me.

I started supplementing magnesium in late November. I noticed right away that my sleep was better. I woke up feeling actually refreshed for the first time in years. (This doesn't happen every day, but it does happen a few times a week, which is way better than before I started supplementing.)

It took considerably longer, at least a month, for me to notice differences in pain. Slowly, I started to notice that I did have a bit less pain and a bit more tolerance for activity. It's not a cure; I definitely still have a chronic pain disorder, but I don't feel as bad as I did before.

I definitely intend to continue supplementing with Natural Calm. It has made a positive difference in my sleep quality, energy levels, and pain levels. I would encourage my fellow chronic pain warriors to take a look at magnesium if you haven't already. I'm happy to answer what questions I can; drop them in my ask box.

#fibro #fibromyalgia #chronic pain #spoonie #magnesium

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baelllamyblake · 7 years ago

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The First Female Reaper ( Bellamy Blake x reader AU )

Summary : You’re a female grounder who’s been kidnapped by the reapers of the mountain men. Dr. Tsing has cleared you for the Cerberus Project and Bellamy has been going to the ends of Earth to get you back from the evil intentions of Mount Weather.

Pairing : Bellamy Blake x fem reader

Warnings : Lil’ bit of gore, couple curse words, not too bad.

Word count : 1,716 words. wowee i have a problem i don’t think i know how long one shots are supposed to be

A/N : yep, another long one. my inso for this one shot is just i never really saw a female reaper so i was like hey never been done before lets do this shit and i just took out Lincoln and replaced him with Y/N. i think it’s long but i think it’s still pretty good ( i hope )

FEEDBACK IS GREATLY APPRECIATED SO PLS FUCK ME UP WID IT <3

The world felt like it was moving in slow motion and the light was blinding. The noise of heavy boots and crunchy leaves echoed throughout your muddied brain, lighting off pain receptors like a million flares all at once. Your vision was blurry and your right eyelid left sticky from the drying blood on your face. You moaned in pain while trying to stretch your limbs. Strong arms and hands held your torso and legs in place. Your hands were bound tightly together. Someone was hauling you away on their shoulder but you couldn’t figure out who. It definitely wasn’t your boyfriend, Bellamy. He would’ve been kissing your face all over, begging you to stay awake for a few more moments. It didn’t matter anyway, you passed out after fading in and out of consciousness for so long.

Bellamy was worried, what if you were dead? He couldn’t stop pacing back and forth in the bunker while Finn was busy interrogating the one-eyed grounder about a damn watch. He was desperate to find you as Finn was desperate to find Clarke. He frantically wished you were by his side, holding his hand and keeping him grounded. Bellamy missed your beautiful smile and the way you talked when teaching him about Earth. He yearned to find you and bring you back home.

A bag was snatched off your head and revealed your surroundings. It was a dimly lit tunnel in Mount Weather. The memories came flooding back painfully as you kept glancing around at your surroundings. Octavia successfully bargained for you but Reapers attacked and kidnapped you. You wondered if Octavia and Bellamy were out there looking for you. Your daze was broken when the door at the end of the tunnel opened and a bunch of people in rubber suits walked into the low light.

“ Harvest, harvest, harvest… ” A woman with a clipboard looked to the fellow grounders before marking them down. Another man in a rubber suit began to inject the reapers with a crimson elixir. You narrowed your eyebrows in confusion after watching the reapers groan in relief and lay still in ecstasy. You brought your attention to the woman who kept marking grounders off. She stood before you and the helmet lights illuminated her features. You grimaced at the tan woman in anger. You didn’t deserve to be here.

“ Mark this one for the Cerberus program. ” The woman said, ticking another mark on her clipboard before observing you one last time. The mountain men grasped you by the biceps and you were too weak to rebel against their grip. The men dragged you to a dark, humid room before shoving you roughly into the centre. You turned around and was met with a torrent of boiling, hot water.

You woke up, fighting for air but was hitched to a chair by a numerous amount of straps. You wailed into your gag, jerking at the ropes, trying desperately to rip them off. The door opened and you lifted your head as much as you could to see who came in.

“ Hello, I’m Cage Wallace. ” the slimeball of a man said, running a finger along your jawline. His cologne burned your nose. All you could do was whimper in fear. He motioned over a guard with the same gun you saw the rubber suit man inject the reapers with. Your eyes grew glossy with tears.

“ The first dose is always the worst, honey. ” Wallace said smiling, not a single shred of sympathy could be found in it. The needle pierced your skin and you felt the drug be absorbed into your bloodstream instantly. You felt a high so unrelenting, you bit the gag in agonizing ecstasy. The convulsions were intense and your body went limp yet you were still clinging to life.

“ We’ve got a pureblood on our hands, boys. ” Wallace happily said, clapping his hands together while you inhaled and exhaled heavily, tears streaming down your eyes. Days and weeks passed but you didn’t know that, you just knew when the Mountain men were coming to torture you and give you your next vial. The torture grew in intensity: longer and more frequent shock treatments and higher dosages. They were conditioning you to become absolutely terrified of the high-pitched shriek a tiny machine emitted. The withdrawals were debilitating your ability to think of anything else but the red drug you craved so badly for.

Cage even had you kill a man for it. You were transformed to a hollow shell of yourself: enraged, hungry, and addicted. Wallace finally let you loose and you killed whatever you could before having to retreat to Mount Weather for that lovely red liquid.

Bellamy and Octavia were teaming together to find you and a way into Mount Weather without getting killed. Unfortunately, they were cornered into a dark and musty car garage by the enshrouding acid fog. Two guards accompanied them before splitting off. You killed the both of them in an rabid frenzy to satisfy the unyielding hunger for blood. Bellamy and Octavia stopped cold in their tracks at the sight they encountered. It was you with white paint splayed across your face, contrasting against the blood running down your chin and neck. You were hunched over Sgt. Scott’s dead body, devouring the meat and skin off his bones like a wolf.

“ Oh my god, Y/N.. What the fuck have they done to you? ” Bellamy’s voice broke as tears pricked at his eyes. You rose at the sound of his voice and immediately stormed the siblings in another blind fury. You tackled Octavia onto the ground and started strangling her. She latched onto your hands, trying to pry them off. Bellamy raised his gun and forced himself to pull the trigger. The bullet hit its mark, piercing your shoulder. You jerked off Octavia in pain, fleeing away from the two into the shadows of the garage. Octavia jerked up, almost hacking up a lung. The siblings quickly hid in a nearby car, hoping that you wouldn’t find them.

“ What are we going to do, Bellamy? Y/N’s a fucking reaper. ” Octavia choked out, her throat felt like it was on fire. You lurked around the car garage, on the prowl for the Blakes. The two hatched up a plan to get you out of Mount Weather and somewhere safe. Bellamy called out, grabbing your attention. You charged at your boyfriend, Octavia coming from the side to shock you in the ribs, knocking you out cold.

You slowly woke up, unfamiliar of where you were. You started screaming, foaming at the mouth and thrashing around in your chains. Bellamy kept watch over you from a distance, he felt guilty having to tie you down like a wild animal. Clarke and Octavia observed you from a close yet safe distance. You tried to strike one of the girls, the effort rendered futile.

“ I knew Mount Weather controlled the Reapers. I had no idea they were creating them. ” Clarke said astonishedly after noticing the purple needle marks in your neck. Bellamy scanned your angry face, nothing of you was there. It was completely replaced by severe addiction and violence. “ If they can do that to Y/N, what are they doing to our friends? ” Bellamy asked Clarke while examining your furious features, longing to embrace you in his arms.

Bellamy just stood in front of you, arms crossed over his chest. You pulled against the ropes as hard as you could. Your wrists started bleeding from the friction of the chains . You continued to thrash around before the chain attached to your wrist severed from the wall and you socked Bellamy square in the face. He staggered backwards, tripping over boxes while holding his cheek in pain. You yanked an ankle restraint out of the floor while Bellamy was disarmed. Clarke immediately scrambled over to constrain you. Your leg jolted out into her stomach, sending her flying onto the ground, dry-heaving. A steel pipe, wielded by Octavia, collided with your skull, sending you to the floor with a dull thud.

Clarke began operating on your shoulder, successfully getting the bullet out. Bellamy sat by your side, regardless of how dangerous it was. You finally looked peaceful despite having to be knocked out. Bellamy moved the hair out of your face and stroked your forehead gently. He needed you more than ever before.

The shit really hit the fan when Octavia barged in with Nyko, screaming that the commander is drawing near with a grounder army to massacre Skaikru. You seized multiple times, Clarke was able to revive you with chest compression but she didn’t know how long the compressions would work. Bellamy wasn’t going to give up on you though, he stuck by your side through every seizure and every coughing fit. He loved you far too much to lose you to addiction.

You seized once again, Abby darting to your side and commencing the chest compression. Bellamy squeezed your hand tightly, eyes growing wide when Abby slowed down then stopped completely.

“ It’s not working, it’s too late. “ Abby sighed out, looking to Bellamy. In a split second, he initiated the chest compressions. Abby was taken aback by Bellamy’s desire to keep you alive, she wasn’t aware of the relationship you shared. Abby scurried for a shock baton and in a last ditch effort, she shocked you in the chest in substitution of a defibrillator. You weren’t breathing so Abby shocked you once more. Your eyes shot open as you jerked to the side and started hacking. Bellamy sighed out in relief, he squeezed your arm as you coughed harshly.

You looked to Bellamy with tears in your eyes and embraced him tightly. It felt so good to feel something other than craving and emptiness. He wrapped his arms around you, bringing you as close as he could. “ I love you so much, Y/N. I’m sorry you had go through this. Thank you so much for staying alive. “ Bellamy choked out, crying into the crook of your neck. Your heart swelled and you broke down.

“ I owe you my life, I love you so much. “ you strained out, your throat crying in misery. Bellamy just pulled you closer and didn’t let go.

He couldn’t afford to lose the love of his life again.

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