#beefro is trash for catfish

[beefrobeefcal]

I was planning on getting out something to celebrate Frankie Friday this week (promp courtesy of @noxturnalpascal - thank you!) but your beef is sick again and despite me getting 2,300+ words down, it makes very little sense.

So I made a banner instead of finishing the fic.

Happy Frankie Friday!

This is Noxy’s promp:

So maybe we’ll have a delayed observance to my fav P-boy’s day of the week?

NyQuil calls to me, babies,

Beefro👌🥩💜

[beefrobeefcal]

dag nabbit this man…

happy frankie friday y’all

💜🧢🐟🚁💸💜

*beefNote: dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique dique*

[beefrobeefcal]

Kinda quick Frankie for Frankie Friday 🤲🏽🎁

You’re the gift that keeps on giving, Takos!

LOOK AT HIM. LOOK. HE LOOKS SO HAPPY. SO FULL AND HAPPY.

*off putting accordion + kazoo duet floats out of a flaming dumpster*

THANK YOU TAKOS! HE’S BEAUTIFUL AND CHUBBY AND OH SO FRANKIE.

Happy Frankie Friday y’all!

I-like-‘em-thicc-I-like-‘em-chunky regards,

Beefro👌🥩💜

[beefrobeefcal]

EVERYONE GET ON MY LEVEL 🍾 FRANKIE MORALES IS JUST THE BEE’s fuckin KNEESSSSzz

I know I’m supposed to be writin dave but FUCK I LOVE FRANKIE

Happy Frankie Friday Babes

[beefrobeefcal]

“I want to make out with hairy plus sized men” -my friend in the middle of a conversation

(I responded by saying “real”)

Such a vibe, Deathy…

Please, for your friend’s sake, send them on over to the Bistro. I won’t out you as being a gold star repeat offender here (unless you want me to).

But that need, I believe, is universal. Tell me I’m wrong. TELL ME IM WRONG! *even if you do, I won’t listen 🙉*

Deathy, just for you and keepin’ it real with your irl friendo, imma slap some On the Waterfront Chapter 8 - Linger here for you under the cut.

Just for Deathy! No one else look!

You-know-I’m-such-a-fool-for-you regards,

Beefro 👌🥩💜

“Mr. Morales...”, you breathed, needy and desperate.

“Babygirl... “, he grinned, crawling up you and pulling your core roughly against his denim-clad hard on. “Can't call me that when I - .”

You let out a whining moan as he rutted against you, feeling the fabric get hot and damp from your arousal smearing across his crotch.

“You call me Frankie when I’m fuckin’ you.”

[beefrobeefcal]

a Message from Beefro

My lovely friendos... after taking a pole and being like "YES I'M FINALLY GOING TO SPACE!", this dumb beefy brain of mine decided to finally find the gumption, the audacity, and the moxie to write OTWF Chapter 8 - Linger. Like write and finish.

So you can look forward to that tomorrow after my gorgeous BetaFish @neverwheremoonchild does what they do best and (hopefully) gives me the OK-GO.

But fret not... to Space I am going, and you all will join me soon.

Burning-out-his-fuse-up-here-alone regards,

Beefro 👌🥩💜

[beefrobeefcal]

Hello there Beefro!

I have a question. How do you like your steak, and why? You can interpret this question any way you like.

Yours in Pascalitis,

El

Time to grill, Tatty!

I like my steak hefty, uncut, and hard. Preferably in private and on a soft surface, but I’m not opposed to having it on a counter top or other hard surface if the mood strikes me. Taken orally or otherwise, I prefer to consume it from a large portion that answers to the name ‘Frankie’.

And why? Because it gets me off, that’s why. 🥩💜🥩

And if you meant how I prefer my steak in the sense of actual beef? I prefer filet mignon, medium rare, grilled, and served oscar with scallops, and grilled seasonal veggies as a side. Because I’m a fancy beef. 🥩

I-need-big-boy regards,

Beefro 👌🥩💜

[beefrobeefcal]

i really hope they make Triple Frontier 2... and thank god ben affleck won't be in it.

also.. imagine seeing frankie as a dad 😩😩

i just made myself horny, bye 👋

To Nonnie, Love Beefro

You’re so real for this, Nonnie… I’m making an assumption because you did put this in my THOT TANK… but I assume we’re horny for the same reasons.

Firstly, hell to the yeah bunnaphlecque won’t be in it.

Secondly… *deep inhale*

MOTHER FUCKIN MIDDLE AGE SPREAD, SPARE TIRE, ‘YEAH, ILL GET BACK TO THE GYM EVENTUALLY’, ‘THIS ENTIRE COSTCO FAMILY SIZED BAG OF ZESTY DORITOS BEING EATIN ALL AT ONCE IS OKAY AS A MIDNIGHT SNACK’ FRANKIE ELIZABETH MORALES.

@morallyinept made a post a while ago when sounds about a possible TF2 was in the works:

AND I FELL APART.

Then @morallyinept followed that up with a ficlet EXPANDING ON THE ABOVE THOTS AND AGAIN… I LOST MY FUCKIN MIND.

This is my personality now. This is who I am. IT’S NOT A PHASE, MOM!

Nonnie, you and I are not alone in our Daddy!Fish getting thicc as hell while being a fuckin hottie homebody… 34lb 7oz toddler baby Jesus wearing a duck bib, I need a THICC ASS FRANKIE ‘CATFISH’ MORALES AND I NEED THIS NOW [cue gif of flaming dumpster].

I-need-a-big-boy regards,

Beefro👌🥩💜

[beefrobeefcal]

Hi Beefro, it’s me, the nonnie who busted fat nuts 🤭 I’m actually on your page quite a bit and we have chatted before but I’m going to keep it concealed bc this is insane

So, ya girl was horny, and the fingers just weren’t doing it. So I grabbed an old pillow and rolled that sucker up, and did my thing. Now I’ll go ahead and tell you that it is mandatory that I make up a good scenario if I really want to bust em. Usually, when I’m doin my thing with the pillow, I imagine I’m actually doin my thing on someone’s thigh—usually a pedge boy bc that’s how I roll. Now, this pillow was a bit soft, and my mind said “hm, why might a thigh be so soft? What pedge boy has soft thighs?”. And, for some reason, my glorious mind said chubby frankie, specifically beefro’s chubby frankie. Girl when I tell you I finished so damn fast and with that man’s name on my tongue 🫣 Imagine riding that man’s thigh, can you really blame me?

Sorry for the tmi, but I have a feeling you don’t mind too much 😘

There’s no such thing as tmi round these parts, Nonnie!

We here at the Bistro thank you for sharing your she-bop-he-bop-we-bop ritual. And I especially thank you for honoring Chubby!Frankie by screaming his name after riding that pillow to fruition.

I’m delighted that you followed up and filled us all in with the dirty details of your thigh-grinding daydream. I’m sure you’ve enlightened - and dare I say inspired - a few folk here with your solo-sesh escapades.

Truly, there is no higher honor as a smutty fic writer than to know your filthy word salad has sated another so sinfully. Thank you again, Naughty Nonnie!

✨😮‍💨🥵🫠🦉💣

You’re-my-butterfly-sugar-baby regards,

Beefro👌🥩💜

[beefrobeefcal]

Beefro I just busted fat nuts to your chubby Frankie while I wasn’t even reading your fic 😭 I’m willing to give details if you would care for them 👀

Naughty Nonnie!😈

You saucy minx. GIMME ALL THE DIRT. BITCH THAT POT AND SPILL, BABY!

Frankie makes me hornier than a 14-peckered owl, so you’re in good company 🦉🫠🥵

Because-I-can't-stop-messin'-with-the-danger-zone regards,

Beefro👌🥩💜

[beefrobeefcal]

I feel it’s time I admit something beefro… I was the nonnie who requested the following:

Dine out & eat in, baby’s got a temper, just desserts, keep your dinner warm and cranky Frankie.

I at some point after discovering your page I just said fuck it no one besides like a few super close friends know I have tumblr so why should I be afraid not of requesting anonymously.

Love u beef🖤

-Deathy

It was you, Deathy?!?

Y’ALL. YOU HAVE A LOT TO THANK DEATHY FOR!

I AM DELIGHTED, AROUSED, SURPRISED, ECSTATIC… do you know what you did? YOU PAVED THE WAY FOR EVERYTHING TO HAPPEN! I would not have taken a stab at one shots or doing anything outside of maybe part 1 of The Catfish & The Mouse if it wasn’t for those THOTs!

Your brain is a delicious rolladex of THOTs and I AM TRULY BLESSED AND HIGHLY FAVOURED that you chose to share that honeypot with me and all the Friendos here in the Bistro.

Thank you thank you thank you thank you. Never stop sending THOTs!

Baby-I’m-amazed regards,

Beefro👌🥩💜

[beefrobeefcal]

i love your chubby!frankie fics, i wanna feed him cookies n cream chocolate. ur fics r just a masterpiece!!

Thank you, Deady! I’m glad that you’re here in the Bistro with us and enjoying Frankie. As you can probably tell, he’s pretty much my fav P-boy to write.

And he could always use another snack. Cookies’n Cream chocolate? Oh hell yeah… the THOT TANK is always open. 😮‍💨🥵😘🥩

Smuttiest regards,

Beefro👌🥩💜

[beefrobeefcal]

Okay you know how I said the ‘Frankie going in a dark warehouse, guns ablaze to save honey’ here’s what I’m thinking:

He goes in, he finds her, saves her. Kills the bad guys. Looks (and feels) like the hero. Heat of the moment they hug (maybe a kiss for razzle dazzle) and the it hits honey. The shit he did and said. She slaps him. Hard across the face. No forgiveness (just yet maybe) bc we are standing on business and not just letting him back in our good graces the moment he does something nice (lol)

I’m having a moment so this is therapeutic for me 😄 lol

Why does BigFish have us in such a choke hold?

I keep going back and rereading previous chapters (for continuity which I have so far not yet mastered), and the fact this fictional man has his boot on my neck has alarmed and encouraged me. It’s not like I want to actually be in a relationship with a man who has me prisoner and I cook for him and he’s scary and mean and tall and fat and big and broad and likes being well-fed and… and… uh… w-what was I talking about?

Anyway, Prinny, your passion for BigFish is admirable and lands you at the top of the Friendos for Dark!Frankie pile. Yes, I am avoiding any and all plot points you may have mentioned.

Come-on-Barbie-lets-go-party regards,

Beefro👌🥩💜

[beefrobeefcal]

Does your recent post mean there's a chance for chubby werewolf Frankie? 👀 Or any of the werewolf p boys?

He-was-a-steppenwolf regards,

Beefro👌🥩💜

[beefrobeefcal]

Can I also ask about OTWF chapter 9? 🥺🥺

I have a rule, Clawdee…

… and that rule is I post no WIP stuff for OTWF unless it’s just about to drop.

It’s not bc I don’t want to share it - no I super do! - but it’s more along the lines of I’m hoarding what ever is coming next for that fic jealously like a dragon on a nest of gold until it’s good and ready.

All this, and the next chapter is… something else.

That being said, you’re welcome to ask questions and pose theories to me all you’d like and if you’re right or asking the along the correct vein, you get a prize. [beefNote: prizes are random and have no monetary value. Not legal tender. You should not consume prizes. If prizes persist, please contact your primary care physician]

Smuttiest regards,

Beefro👌🥩💜

[beefrobeefcal]

Mhmm. Yea. You caused this. This is me coming into your house and letting out a blood curling scream. Mhmm. Do it again. Make Frankie the biggest, meanest bad guy ever. Make him scream and fight and cover him with blood and manhandle me and yell in my face. I deserve it.

Lololol that’s my issues talking, I promise I’m okay 👌🏼 but for realsies chp 8 is EVERYTHING! I fucking love it!!!! I love you!!!!

I fucking love you, too, Prinny!

These gifs are exactly how you make me feel when you pop up in the THOT TANK, Prinny 💜🥩🫠😭Especially when I post something than could potentially angry up the blood & produce carnal thots…

The day you kick down my front door and let out a blood curdling scream, not only will I thank you for not actually damaging my door in the process, I’d marvel at your impressive lung capacity.

I’d also tell you that you are deserving of, owed even, a large mean man to carry out all sorts of deliciously loud and angsty things for/at you. Not that I wish you harm, Prinny - nay nay! But I believe you should be able to live out your dreams and be those fuckin SpongeBob memes incarnate.

I will always choose a Mean Big Fish, hand over fist, time and time again, and you are only adding fuel to my Frankie Fire. But I still don’t know if you can convince me he deserves a happy ending…

Keep up the sinful work & thank you for being you!

I’m-a-great-fuck-but-a-better-lover regards,

Beefro👌🥩💜