#bedtime stories about purpose and intent
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my main issue with pill is that she can't decide either.
it is either "i am her" or she'll listen to me blather on and on and on and say "have you considered it's not true?"
so what is it? would you accept you are Her, and that telling me that made me so much worse on topic of Her? (better in some ways, but still utterly helpless)
or are you going to give me a reality check and try and fix my brain because it's hurting you too?
if you genuinely do not want me in that way, then stop agreeing with my delusions? are you Her? are you not?
why would you spend time and effort convincing me you are, just to flip-flop endlessly?? i am not sane. i need clear conclusions.
the time we genuinely tore each other to shreds was when i spoke about what i Feel and what i Think. because there are things that Feel right to me, logical, clear as day. but when i Think about it for long enough, it's really nothing besides schizophrenic delusions. i can still differentiate. but that's what hurts. i want to succumb fully or cut it all away. i can't be ambivalent HERE.
i will be happier if i succumb. i will be healthier if i cut away. i am neither currently. it all hurts so much.
"it really can't be possible", tells me my logic. "but it all perfectly lines up and makes so much sense", tells me my insanity. i am not the one to decide.
we talked about dissociation and voices too. and we're both unusual in that regard. so she must know how this feels. to be forever suspended in unknowing. to rely on others to show you a way to live.
#and what do i really have?#a father who is always drunk and delusional and won't say shit besides feeding into my ambiguity?#a mother who just starts crying and blaming herself so it's absolutely impossible to get anything out of her?#my other family members who never knew a single thing about me/us really?#a god who mocks me inside my head 24/7?#''to see the world again - and my sister just gives me that weird surreal look''#if she's not... why do i remember? holding a hand in a red enveloping warmth#bedtime stories about purpose and intent#not ever matching anything - but having to share a single thing#tubes snaking up and down and hushed voices all around#a body on a metal table covered in white#cold clammy grasp of march dirt#white white white flowers losing petals#the rot setting in the rot sets in the rot sets in the rot sets in the rot sets in#why the fuck do i have to remember these things if they never happened??#i know it's not true - but i've burned every picture and every diary#so how can i trust this decision? if i never trusted my memory either way it sides?
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I! Am so tired of the infantilization of Papyrus. I'm so tired of the infantilization of autistic people, and autistic traits. I thought we were past this in this fandom... but NOPE.
I am absolutely NOT going to name any names, (especially because I don't think ANY of this is intentional!!! I don't think people are doing it on purpose!!! And I don't want to hurt people. And also because it's SO many people now. I see it all the time from so many different places. It would be impossible to list them all.)
But??? I am getting increasingly uncomfortable with the casual ableism in Papyrus fans, bloggers, and writers who don't even realize that's what they're doing. People who say they are against the infantilization of Papyrus.
(Sticking the rest of this under a cut so I don't clog any feeds)
I just!!!! It's all well and good to have your headcanons about Papyrus! He's a really mysterious character that we don't know a lot about! I'm not denying that! But I see SO many people just… saying things like:
"Papyrus would NEVER do (insert autistic trait here) because he's an ADULT! CLEARLY it was a joke."
or
"People take him seriously or at face value when he does (insert autistic trait here) but he's not stupid???? Clearly it means something else-"
And so freaking many variations of that.
Just. Have your headcanons about what Papyrus means or doesn't mean. That's okay! If you think he's joking that's FINE! But PLEASE don't shit on other people and be so casually ableist by saying that he could never be these things, or that these things would mean he was stupid, or childlike if he ACTUALLY meant them or did them.
ITS LIKE. Taking the initial infantilization of Papyrus in fandom and spinning it on it's head so far it goes right back into infantilizing autistic people by just. REMOVING PAPYRUS'S AUTISITC TRAITS AFTER LABELING THEM STUPID OR CHILDLIKE.
"You're infantilizing Papyrus! CLEARLY he could never actually MEAN these things or do those things for real because he's an adult-" AND LIKE. BABE. THOSE THINGS ARE JUST AUTISTIC THINGS.
And just.
It's really really upsetting to see the traits that I personally relate to in Papyrus have people saying "he could NEVER actually mean/do that! CLEARLY it was a joke, or subterfuge or insert something else here-"(the very strongly implied "because only Children do that" is so clear it's nauseating) (And often stated, but just in slightly different language. "It's clear." or "Of course Papyrus wouldn't-" or "He's smart!" or "He's an adult!")
Most of the portrayals I see of Papyrus are wonderful. While I've seen this a lot in fandom, I don't think it's the majority of people who create or write, or blog Papyrus content. But it's a big enough chunk that it is incredibly worrying and upsetting.
I'm also not trying to wave away any level of subterfuge, or mystery that Papyrus has. Because he has a lot! And!!! He's a grown ass adult! (A HILARIOUS one who cracks a shit ton of jokes and is witty as hell.) Someone who is very sneaky about many things, and masks a lot, and is clearly hiding SOMETHING. Have fun theorizing about him, because there sure is a lot to theorize about! Sneaky, sneaky skeleton...
Just. While I'm not trying to change anyone's headcanons... It might be worth it to see if the Papyrus you create has been removed from all of his autistic traits that are deemed undesirable (a level of social ineptitude or not understanding others, routines like bedtime stories, and so much more) while only leaving the ones you think are quirky or fun (things like masking, or stimming with big, flailing gestures, special interest in puzzles, etc.).
And if that's true, why might that be?
If the answer is "because Papyrus is too smart/mature/clever/etc. to mean or do this seriously." then that is no longer an innocent headcanon. That is saying that people who DO have those traits aren't smart/mature/clever/etc. That is infantilizing autistic traits. (And yes! Autistic people can also do this by accident! I used to fall victim to internalized ableism that I didn't even realize was there, and I've seen other people do it, too.)
I was going to get into a more in-depth list of Papyrus’s traits that are autistic traits or could be caused by being autistic, and basically write an entire fan essay on the whole situation, starting from the beginning infantilization of Papyrus in fandom (equally as bad) and ending with where we're at now as Papyrus fans. (This right now is not an essay. It's a vent, and a plea. When I say essay, I mean with cited sources, properly structured... An actual ESSAY that would help people.)
But… I’m tired. I know it’s an accident in most cases. I know that most people probably don’t realize they’re calling autistic traits “stupid” or “childlike” or “papyrus would never because he’s not a child—“
And I know that this one simple post isn’t enough to explain how autistic peoples’ brains frequently work, or why these things don’t mean someone is stupid or childlike.
I know that without a thorough explanation there’s so many people that won’t realize that they’re doing this. And it’s certainly not as gentle as I wanted to be. I want to be kind, because I know that it's an accident, and that people aren't trying to be cruel or harmful.
But I’m just… tired. I’m so, so tired. It’s hard to gently explain to people that are actively harming you and your community why what they’re doing is hurtful.
Maybe someday I’ll actually write that essay, and I can include helpful tips on what autism can look like, or how Papyrus's differing things COULD be (not necessarily ARE) an indication or presentation of autism, and also some more tips on how to integrate some of Papyrus’s characteristics in different ways in a fic that keeps his wonderful autistic swag if that's what you want to do. Maybe I can delve into some more of the nuance of this discussion, of which there is much.
But right now I can’t.
If you're worried you might be doing something like this but you really do need an essay or more structure and specific writing breaking it all out, then. Well! I want to help people. If you have questions about what I said and genuinely want to learn, I can do my best to answer and help in an essay if there's enough questions, or in asks if its just a one off question.
(Though absolutely no promises. The entire discussion is draining and triggering, so... It's hard. Please don't be surprised if I'm unable to keep conversation about this going.)
I don't want to write the essay if it's not going to help anyone though. So… let me know. Maybe in reblogs. Just please not in my DMs. I'll turn on anonymous asks for the next month or so, and if people use them to be cruel, or confrontational, I will be taking that away again.
If you've made it this far... Thanks for reading.
...And, you know what? Shitty TLDR:
Papyrus is a grown ass man who can say fuck and be a bad ass bitch, and who can also be an autistic adult. These things are not mutually exclusive to each other.
Edit: Someone sent me a wonderful essay written by the-irken-pony about Papyrus and autism that was written in the earlier days of the fandom and Papyrus infantilization. (I have no idea how I haven’t seen this before.)
It’s not the current issue of “wow you became the thing you most sought to destroy (infantilization)” in Papyrus’s fan base, but it’s a wonderful breakdown of autism in Papyrus. It’s a good thing to read with this. You don’t have to accept the various headcanons as yours, but please take note of the various things that could be caused by autism. And then make sure that you aren’t calling those things childish.
#floof talks#undertale#undertale papyrus#papyrus undertale#papyrus#autism#tws:#ableism#vent post#discourse#infantilization#swearing#let me know if i missed any tw's please#i'm sorry i don't normally ever post things like this#i don't even do theory or headcanon posts#but this is very relevant to my blog so...#i'm so tired#sorry#i'm not trying to get on anyone's bad side#i'm just tired and overwhelmed#and i wonder how many people other than me have been hurt by it#and if making a post can help with that...#well. yeah. im gonna do it#i don't see people talking about this and im probably just not looking at the right places#but i have a platform and no one is talking that i can see#maybe this wont work to change anyone's mind#but maybe it will#and i have to try even if im honestly terrified
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Hi! I was thinking about a run that ends up being too long because of something like a heard , were Daryl and the reader have to stay the night in a library. The reader is a big fan of books and she knows a lot about literature (maybe you can say she was a student of a literature degree back before the outbreak). Daryl is like 'I've never really read any book' or 'noone read anybook for me when I was little' and reader ends up reading one of her favourites to him while he lays his head on her lap and she tuches his hair or something fluffy like that. Some of my favorite books include Carrie, The Picture of Dorian Gray and Lord of the Rings; just if you wanted inspiration for the book that she reads him.
I hope you like the idea!
Bedtime Stories
✧ Pairing : Daryl Dixon x Reader
✧ Era : Season 2 (time jump)
✧ Pronouns : she/her
✧ Genre : Fluff
✧ Word Count : 3.1k
AN ~ This idea is so cute, I love it! But I am sorry to the person who requested this because I took way longer to write this than I usually would. It’s just been sitting in my drafts for a while now, but I finally got around to writing out the idea. Thank you for being patient and I hope you enjoy!
Your lungs started to burn, your legs beginning to weaken as you continued to run as fast as you could, desperately trying to keep up as the two of you quite literally ran for your lives. Somehow the run you both volunteered to take just turned into one giant disaster, one thing falling apart after another.
It was the dead of winter, the group hopping from place to place ever since the loss of the farm, and everything always running low. All the supplies you managed to have saved went out the window in a flash, leaving you with almost nothing when you had numerous people to feed. So desperate times called for desperate measures, leading to you and Daryl leaving early that morning, trudging through the cold weather and into a small town nearby in hopes that they had at least something to bring back for the others. But luck wasn’t really on your side.
There were a couple small buildings the two of you came across, a few cans of food here and there that you could easily toss into your bags. Though none of it was nearly enough to feed all the people you had. The thought alone saddened you to no end, coming to the realization of how complicated everything was now that you were out on the road constantly. You found yourself not even really knowing how good you had it back when you had sanctuary, a safe place to sleep at night, food…it was all very frustrating.
But you knew you were preaching to the choir as everyone else was easily feeling the same way as you, defeated and exhausted twenty-four-seven now. Though that wasn’t necessarily the only thing going wrong at the moment. The group itself was much more tense than it ever was before, the whole atmosphere seeming to change ever since that night Rick broke down completely. The loss of Shane and Lori being pregnant was taking a toll on him that no one else could understand, leading to him taking it out on everyone else. A part of you almost wondered if you and Daryl subconsciously took this run on purpose just to get away from all of that for a few hours.
Though that wasn’t the only reason you wanted to go, another part of you wanted to be able to bring something back. You wanted to be the one to lift their spirits, hoping that you and Daryl would come across something that would bring back that light. But then again, luck wasn’t on your side.
Unbeknownst to the two of you as you searched, a large herd of walkers were slowly limping their way down the streets of the small town, making even more noise the closer they approached. Eventually you both perked up at the sudden familiar sounds, walking out of the building you were once in to see the group coming straight towards you, their jaws hanging and their arms stretched out with the intention to tear into you.
“Go.” was all Daryl said as he pushed you to run first, sprinting down the narrow streets in hopes to find somewhere to hide. Most of the stores you came across were completely locked up tight, and it was too late to turn back into the one you once occupied. So according to you, you were pretty much fucked.
The two of you looked around frantically as you ran, adrenaline pumping through your system as your heart pounded roughly against your chest. There was close to nothing else around, nowhere else to shield yourselves behind as they slowly crept up closer, surprisingly fast with how slow they appeared to move. It now seemed that last bit of bad luck had wiped out all the hope that was left in your being.
That is until Daryl came across a door neither of you had tried before, tugging at it as it surprisingly flew open loudly. Relief filled your chest as you didn’t hesitate to book it inside the space, Daryl following in close behind you before he slammed the door shut again. The two of you then frantically looked around for only a moment, before shoving a few pieces of furniture near the double doors to block off the walkers that would surely try to push their way inside. As expected, they began to pound on the structure from the outside, sending the two of you flying back a few steps as you caught your breath, making sure they weren’t strong enough to push through.
Though after listening for a few passing seconds, it was clear they weren’t getting inside anytime soon, leaving you able to slightly relax as you hunched over to place your hands on your knees, your breathing still heavy.
Daryl noticed out of the corner of his eye, reaching out to place a hand on your shoulder, “You alright?”
You nodded as you stood back up straight, “Yeah…that was just…too close.” you sighed, running a hand stressfully through your hair.
He huffed, “Yeah…shit’s messy all over the damn place apparently.” he commented, clearly referring to how much had happened in the span of only about a month, or maybe two. You weren’t totally sure, but what you did know was that the whole thing felt like an eternity.
You found yourself wordlessly nodding in agreement, turning away from him momentarily as you grew curious as to where you had ended up. It had grown dark outside with how long the two of you stayed out searching, leading the place being completely pitch black as well. Nothing but a brief glimpse of moonlight shining through the small windows.
You reached back to the side of your backpack, pulling out your flashlight and flicking it on to see a plethora of bookshelves lined up in the large space, your face also seeming to light up in the process. It had been way too long since the last time you came across so many shelves stuffed full of mountains and mountains of books.
But apparently Daryl was less than amused, scoffing to himself as he looked around as well, “Great…we’re stuck inside some damn Barnes and Noble.”
You gave him a look, “It’s a library, Daryl.” you said in an unimpressed tone.
He raised an eyebrow towards you in response, “Yer tellin me there’s a difference?” he asked in amusement.
Your mouth parted to respond, but your mind came up blank as you slowly came to the realization that there really wasn’t much of a difference at all. He chuckled as he watched you grow silent, nudging your side before taking out his own flashlight. “You go ahead and take the left, I’ll take the right. Gotta make sure this place is safe.” he muttered before slowly walking off.
You followed his lead as you turned to head in the other direction, shining your light in different parts of the area to make sure there weren’t any lingering walkers nearby inside with the two of you. Though you couldn’t hear anything besides the corpses still banging on the outside, it was better to be safe than sorry. But everything was eerie and quiet as you passed by the many tall bookshelves, the scene itself almost making you more paranoid that something was going to just jump out at you out of nowhere. The area looked almost untouched however, causing you to smile a little to yourself at the thought of raiders and survivors just passing this place by because well…it was just a library. But you found yourself just the smallest bit excited, always knowing you were a bit of a bookworm at heart.
Your gaze continued to lazily scan the space for any danger, when all of a sudden, a certain section to your right caught your eye and made you stop in your tracks. The sign read in big blocked letters: Horror. That brought a big smile to your face as you found that was your favorite genre to read back when you actually had the time to read. You loved the thrill, the suspense, everything it had to offer as it left goosebumps on your skin. Something about those kinds of books always drew you in, in a way you couldn’t really understand.
The covers and titles easily had you distracted, hovering toward them just to take a peek at what this place had to offer. And to your surprise there were a fair amount of good finds. The Exorcist, Rebecca, Frankenstein, Salem’s Lot. You found yourself going deeper down the rabbit hole as your eyes scanned the spines of them thoroughly, wondering how many you would be able to actually fit in your bag to take back. Because the truth was you missed being able to read, wanting something simple like this again to pass the time like you used to.
“The hell you doin?”
You physically felt yourself jump out of your skin at his sudden presence, holding a hand up to your chest as you let out a shuddering breath. “Holy shit…don’t do that.” you said as you reached over to push his chest gently.
He laughed softly in response as he raised an eyebrow at you, “I can tell ya what yer not doin.” he hinted, “How’s the left side lookin?”
You shrugged, “It seems...safe enough…” you smiled sheepishly.
“Uh huh.” he muttered.
“I got distracted, okay?” you said with a light laugh before your gaze fell back on where you were once looking, “I mean I can’t even remember the last time I saw this many books.”
The man paused for a minute as he watched your expression, how it seemed to light up even more in the darkness as you looked back to all the covers you still had yet to pick through. A sense of fondness washed over him as he watched you obviously gush over something you were passionate about. He wanted you to speak more about it, wanting to listen to your voice go on and on about the things you loved most about them, but he was almost too embarrassed to ask.
Though after a few moments of silence, his frame leaned up against the shelf to his left as he continued to stare, “Didn't know you were a reader.” he commented.
You shrugged as you didn’t break your gaze away from the book you pulled out to look at, “I guess I just never mentioned it…” you trailed off as you read the short summary on the back, before placing it up in it’s place again, “But I used to read all the time. What about you, you got any favorites?” you asked as you looked back towards him with a small and exciting smile.
It was an innocent question really, but all Daryl could do was pathetically shrug, not really wanting to go into depth about the real answer.
But you tilted your head at him as you wanted to know, genuinely growing curious, “Oh come on. You have to at least have one.”
Daryl scoffed as he looked back up to you, “I…I ain’t ever really…” he trailed off again before letting out a harsh sigh, “Look, I ain’t ever read anythin before, alright? I don’t got no favorite.”
You were slightly taken aback, almost not believing him at first. But his face and tone were nothing but serious, showing you that he was telling the truth about having not read a single book in his life. “...Really?” you asked softly, “Not even in school or anything?”
He huffed out a small chuckle, “Ya mean when I actually went ta school? Yeah…don’t really think readin was at the top of my priority list.”
You rolled your eyes playfully, “Okay, fine. But seriously, no one ever read anything to you? Not even your…”
The two of you froze when you trailed off, though it was obvious what you were about to say. You knew of his past, how hard things were on him when he was a kid, you honestly didn’t even mean to let that last part slip as if you had forgotten. You hadn’t. But now you just wished you could take it all back as you felt ashamed and utterly embarrassed, a part of you also feeling terrible that he had never had that kind of comfort before.
In your childhood home, it was somewhat of a nightly routine that your parents would read you a short story every night before bed. You always loved that part, getting all snuggled up while your eyes slowly fluttered closed, hearing the soothing sound of their voices as they spoke until you were fast asleep. Now realizing that Daryl had never even had a sliver of that, brought a small frown to your face. But in a way, it also made you a little determined to make it up to him somehow.
Your eyes slowly trailed back to the bookshelf for a moment or two, before your eyes widened ever so slightly when you caught a glimpse of an all too familiar title. Carrie by Stephen King was one of your favorite books of all time, the plot being so interesting it left you at the edge of your seat as you went on. It was almost like some sort of sign to you as an idea formed in your head.
“Well…” you spoke quietly as you reached up to grab it, “It looks like we could be stuck in here for a while.” you mentioned, jutting your thumb back towards the doors where the walkers were still lingering. “What if I read to you?”
His eyes whipped back up to look at you, his face almost unreadable as he processed what you had just said. At first he wanted to decline, not because he didn’t want to hear the gentleness of your voice reading aloud to him, that sounded like a damn dream. But he didn’t want you to do something like this out of guilt, like you pitied him for not having that kind of luxury you used to have. It honestly wasn’t that big of a deal, something he hadn’t really thought about until now. But not even he could deny that as he stewed over it, he found himself missing out on something else from his childhood that he could never get back.
“Nah,” he shook his head as he stood up a bit straighter, “You don’t gotta do that, it’s alright.” he assured.
But your brows furrowed as you shook your head, “But I want to. I think it’ll be…nice.” you said honestly, wanting to reassure him that you actually wanted to do this.
He took in a breath as he studied your facial expression, seeing you were truly being genuine and sincere, and that warmed his heart more than you were able to imagine. You truly were the sweetest person he had ever met, constantly treating him with kindness ever since you had first met. And that only made his tough exterior soften in an instant.
“Alright…if you’re sure…” he finally agreed hesitantly.
You smiled brightly at him, “I’m sure.” you promised, nodding your head back for him to follow you to find a place to sit for the time being. Neither of you knew how long you would be trapped in here. A few hours? Overnight? You weren’t sure, but one thing you did know was that the two of you did not want to go back to the group just yet. You could almost feel the tension radiating from all the way over here when they were miles and miles away.
The flashlight in your hand shined down towards a spot where there were a few cushioned seats, causing you to pick the one placed in the corner before you plopped down, removing the bag from your shoulders in the process. As your body was turned away for just a brief moment, you then felt Daryl sit down beside you, before he adjusted himself to where his head was gently resting in your lap. Your eyes quickly glanced back down to look at him, catching the small smile he had on his face as he stared up at you softly. You couldn’t help but smile back, shaking your head a little to try and focus. But it was hard to do when his eyes were piercing, so clearly full of gentleness and care.
“Okay, so this right here is a classic.” you said as you pointed to the cover, “It’s one of my favorite horror novels, and I actually think you’ll really like it.”
His eyes moved over the cover as he nodded along, “Do I get ta hold yer hand if I get scared?” he suddenly teased with a small smirk.
You laughed quietly, “Sure, tough guy, you can hold my hand.”
He chuckled lightly as he nodded, watching you intently as you opened up the book, using the light of the flashlight you placed behind you to be able to see the tiny words on the pages. You squinted a little at first, before your soft voice began to read out loud to him, already feeling himself relax a little more at something so simple. If he was being completely honest with himself, he didn’t really care what you were reading. You could be reciting words from the English dictionary for all he cared. There was just something about hearing your voice in general that sent a wave of peace through him.
Eventually as the minutes flew by with the two of you engrossed in the events happening, your other hand traveled down to his hair, running your fingers through it gently. Daryl felt his heart flutter in his chest at the mindless action, almost as if it was second nature to you, making his eyes involuntarily close as he sighed deeply. He hadn’t felt this calm, this comforted by someone he cared about deeply in quite a long time. In fact, he seemed to question to himself if he ever had this feeling. The realization seemed to hit him then, but he almost didn’t care. He was just happy he had someone in his life now that was willing to give him all of that and more.
You noticed quickly however how his breathing seemed to change as he still laid beneath you, your eyes moving down to look at his face and see that he had fallen asleep after only barely getting through about three chapters. A small smile stretched across your face, closing the book and placing it back down beside you as your hand continued to gently run through the locks of his thick hair. Your eyes moved over the calm features of his face, taking in the fact that you had given him something that you once used to cherish. The unwinding feeling of someone reading you to sleep.
“Thank you…” his voice suddenly spoke quietly, moving to get even more comfortable in your lap as he drifted off.
In an instant your eyes seemed to glisten with tears at the simple gratitude, seeing how precious he really was. “Of course.” you whispered back, blinking away your tears as you hesitated for a moment, before leaning down to place a soft kiss on his forehead.
And after that night you two spent together, you found yourself always trying to do the little things for him to make him feel safe. Because those were the things you found that mattered the most.
~ Thanks for reading!
#daryl dixon#daryl dixon fanfiction#daryl dixon the walking dead#daryl dixion imagine#daryl dixon twd#daryl dixon x oc#daryl dixion x reader#daryl dixon x original character#daryl dixon x female reader#daryl dixon x you#daryl dixon x reader#daryl dixon x y/n#the walking dead#the walking dead fanfiction#the walking dead daryl#the walking dead imagine#twd daryl dixon#daryl twd#twd daryl#twd fanfiction#twd#norman reedus#norman reedus fanfiction#norman reedus x reader
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the locked tomb holiday exchange rec list
Behold! The good, the magnificent, the sad! The filth and the angst and the feelings! The weird shit that would make TazMuir proud! 💀🎉✨☠️🔥🎊
Here are some favourites from a skim of works posted for @tlt-holiday-exchange, both art and fic. They are MANY and they are JUICY. Find the entire collection HERE, and keep an eye on for authors reveal coming soon!
ART FILLS
A Beautiful Fairy Tale. Wake tells little Bomb a bedtime story but she can't mention a princess without talking about guillotines. Rated T.
Dubious Curiosity. Nona is curious. Nona loves everyone. And Nona wants Cam. (Camilla/Nona) Rated M.
Fingers In Her Mouth. Camilla Hect misses the Warden. Maybe he can lend a helping hand… even in death. (Camilla/hand!Palamedes) Rated M.
just guys being bros. Camilla/Gideon. Gideon touches a boob! A very happy new year to awkward butch lesbians everywhere. Rated T.
Pyrrha Dve Appreciation. Pyrrha & Nona, soft hugs! Rated G.
Stealing Breath. Camilla/Gideon butch-off make-out session. Rated G.
To Shreds, You Say? Pyrrha/Mercymorn/Wake fucking nasty. Rated E.
FIC FILLS
a buried and a burning flame. Coronabeth fucks Gideon's corpse. Rated E.
For all intents and purposes the corpse of the Ninth’s cavalier is a bad lay. That’s all fine, though.
a grave, deep and narrow. Camilla/Palamedes, GtN AU, Character Death, Tape Recorder Conversation Redux. Podfic included! Rated T
Only Lyctors were meant to leave the First House alive. Ianthe insists on bringing Coronabeth; Judith dies of her injuries. Camilla is stranded alone at Canaan House — alone, except for the persistent hallucinations of her necromancer.
affix. Coronabeth/Harrow, humiliation kink, improper use of bones, dom!Harrow, GtN era. rated E.
Cytherea doesn't go to Canaan House AU - Corona overconfidently approaches Harrow in the hopes of exchanging lab keys. Harrow humbles her quickly.
AITA for telling my dad I didn't like my birthday party? Gideon & John, In-Universe Social Media, Character study, Rated T.
I (20F) told my dad (45?M) that I wanted a cool birthday party, but he threw me a terrible birthday party instead. Am I really the asshole for telling him I didn't like it?
and kings shall come out of thy loins. Gideon/Ianthe, crack treated seriously, body horor, SNAKES. Rated M.
Ianthe saves God from the stoma and the River and all she has to show for it are these fucking snubes.
come, dearest heart. Lyctor Palamedes AU, HtN era. Camilla/Palamedes, Pyrrha/Palamedes, Pyrrha/Camilla/Palamedes. Rated E.
In Canaan House, Palamedes Sextus unwillingly ascends to Lyctorhood to put an end to Cytherea the First's rampage. He's left heartbroken, grieving, and terribly, terribly lonely.
Don't Care If You Think I'm Dumb (I Don't Care At All). Gideon/Ianthe, Gideon as Kiriona, Unwholesome Tower Princes Bonding ft. bad sex and retail therapy. Rated E.
The newly christened Kiriona Gaia is not having a good time on the Mithraeum. At least she has Ianthe there to make her worse.
Follow Your Dreams, Never Let Them Die. Gideon/Harrow, Pokemon trainers AU! Rated T.
On her Pokemon Journey, Gideon Nav approaches the mysterious Drearburh City Gym - but something feels oddly familiar.
Gaia's Natural Market. modern AU, retail hell, Harrow/Gideon, Harrow/Ianthe, Gideon/Ianthe. Rated T
RING-A-DING-DING, the Holiday's are here! And nothing says "Give!" like the bounty of the Mother Herself, so come on by to GAIA's Natural Market! Treat your family to a home-cooked meal with only the PUREST of ingredients - all Produce Organic, all Products non-GMO, and all Smiles Authentic and free of Toxins!
Good Girl. Coronabeth/Ianthe, puppyplay, muzzles, rated E.
Coronabeth is Ianthe's big dicked bimbo puppy. Ianthe's into it.
Goodnight, New Rho. Camilla & Nona. Domestic Fluff, Missing Scene. Rated G.
Nona gets a bedtime story. Camilla reminisces about growing up with an older sister. They both sleep well, despite a notable lack of dogs.
In the Empire of the Deeps. Gideon/Nona/Ianthe, Gideon/Ianthe, Pirate AU, monsterfucking-adjacent, Nona is an eldritch sea creature. Rated E.
A chance encounter on the beach. Ianthe is manipulative, Kiriona is sad, and Nona is not as innocent as she seems. Sometimes, you might yearn for one person and meet another one. Sometimes, you have to take what you can get.
just like normal. Ianthe/Coronabeth, Cytherea is also there. Penis in vagina sex, Exhibitionism, Squirting. Rated E.
Ianthe gives herself a cock, and Corona is increasingly bewildered that she hasn’t been allowed to sit on it yet.
language of its own. Camilla/Palamedes. Worldbuilding, idiots to lovers, pre-canon. Rated T.
Camilla Hect has to do an erotic poetry final.
Masochism Tango. Porn with feelings, knifeplay, vivisection, lyctor-typical everything. Rated E.
Two occasions in which Pyrrha Dve had the pleasure of being under Cytherea's knife, and Mercymorn had the pleasure of Pyrrha Dve.
METHODS OF SUBDUCTION. Judith/Cornabeth, Judith & Varun. Planetary science rizz. Rated M.
Varun the Eater teaches Judith Deuteros how to flirt.
midnight mass. Mercymorn/Cristabel, pre-canon, Character Study. Rated T.
A lifetime before the resurrection and two decades before the apocalypse, a novice nun and a third-year medical student discuss goodness, passion, and salvation at midnight on Christmas morning.
motherhood. Mercymorn uses flesh magic on Wake. Hate sex ensues. Body horror, motherhood as violence, canon compliant. Rated E.
“I will kill you,” you say, with all the placid fervor of a religious convert. When you’re on the edge of real violence, you lose that tense little furrow in your brow—it’s beautiful, really. “Please give me a reason.”
My Love Overflows. Corona/Ianthe, Strap-on, Dirty talk, Impact Play, Hair Pulling, Bladder control. Rated E.
The one in which Corona pisses all over herself at Ianthe's whims.
name and rank. Judith/Coronabeth, Judith & Varun. Judith's failwoman swag! Rated T.
As Judith lies dying, she has nothing but time. Varun the Eater uses it to teach her how to flirt with the Princess. Don’t worry. Varun has got this!
New Rule. Mercymorn/Pyrrha, Ranch AU, stablehand Pyrrha, boss/employee relationship. Rated E.
Never hire stablehands who are too handsome and capable for their own good.
no shade in the shadow of the cross. Cytherea/Mercymorn, angst, fisting, two pillow princesses NOT making it work! Rated E.
Cytherea and Mercymorn have an ill-timed tryst.
per my last email. Camilla/Palamedes. Academia, banter. On peer review and multitasking. Rated M.
“Warden,” she said patiently, “you want me so badly it’s making you stupid."
RISKING OUR LIVES FOR UNIVERSITY HOLE???? 🤯😳 University AU, Team 69. The hole is a basement to be clear! Rated T.
The difficult part of visiting the local haunted house for a feature in the university magazine is not actually the visiting; it’s the writing about it afterwards.
So Messed Up. Ianthe/Coronabeth. Puppy play, collars & leashes, tail plug. Rated E.
Ianthe using her flesh magic to give Corona a big cock for petplay because she loves the idea of her sister being a big dicked bimbo puppy girl who just wants to rut into her.
The Great Gamete Gambit. Camilla & Palamedes, Pre-canon, worldbuilding, sixth house reproductive practices. Rated G.
Palamedes and Camilla have an important package to send, but there's been a heist in the gamete repository! Can the 15-year-old Master Warden and his cavalier crack the case?
The Sextus Scandal. Camilla/Palamedes, Epistolary, Pre-Canon Divergence. Rated E.
Transcripts and documents relating to the disciplinary hearing and subsequent resignation of Master Warden Palamedes Sextus.
Ways to Be Perfect. Babs/Colum Asht, GtN era, Rated M.
When Naberius first glanced across the supper table at Colum Asht, he didn’t immediately get the impression that he was liked.
The end!
Thank you for making it this far. If you enjoyed any of these works, or anything else in the collection, please drop a comment to make our creators feel appreciated <3
[post creators reveal exchange wrap post]
#tlt fic#fic recs#tlt holiday ex 2023#tlt fanfic#tlt fanart#tlt#the locked tomb#if you enjoyed these pls leave feedback on the collection <3#and thanks to the mods for putting it all together#114 (!!!!) works now!!!
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Tales
@willofutu thank you for requesting Wanshi!❤️
I had difficulty writing about him since in the lore, the only time when Strike Hawks and Gray Raven interact is through special missions... I had to compromise the setting in order for this to work.
Anyways, please enjoy!
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“Once upon a time, there was a princess that could not dream. She didn’t know the reason. She would watch her siblings over meals telling their adventures in dreamland, excited and anxious over the events during their sleep.”
Wanshi studied the data presented in his terminal that was sent by Babylonia the afternoon earlier. His eyes drooped and heavy as he let out a yawn. He wanted to sleep. He deserves it, he thought. He was able to guide survivors from the heavy attacks of Heterocreatures earlier with only three deaths… Sad, but commendable… but still, not enough.
His ears strained to the voice of a human telling a bedtime story to the children they saved.
“The princess listened, wondering if she could ever dream. Night came, and the words of her siblings echoed in her mind. She tossed and turned but to no avail. Sleep was not coming anytime soon. She was too invested in her siblings’ stories. This continued until daylight.”
A child, not older than seven, snuggled his bony body closer to the construct’s leg. His eyes were sunken and tired, latching onto the mechanical leg of the sniper medic. Wanshi watched as the other children slowly fell asleep. Their sleepy gaze and snores were infectious as he yawned once more.
“This is stupid.” The boy against his leg grumbled, “Why is the princess not dreaming?”
“Shh. Just listen.”
“The princess came to her parents, asking why she couldn’t dream. The queen sobbed while the king comforted his wife. She was dismissed. Her question wasn’t answered. She approached the maids and they excused themselves. She went to the guards, but they were suddenly alert. She was confused.”
Wanshi closed his eyes as he thought about the boy’s question. Why was the princess not dreaming? What was the purpose? As a former doctor, he also studied the reason why dreams occur. Scientifically, it would be explained, but tales are tales. The reason why the princess couldn’t dream might be magical and purely nonsensical.
“No one would answer her. Not even the royal doctor could help. But she was adamant. She wanted to know what it felt like to dream. Every day, she listens to her siblings intently, studying and coming to conclusions on how to dream. She tries every night to dream but only fails. The stories of her siblings only filled her mind all night. Then one day, she was finally able to dream. Not during sleep, but while she was awake.”
“Weird...” Wanshi patted the complaining boy.
The boy’s mouth was agape, eyes looking up at the eyes-closed construct, “what does that mean? ‘The end’?”
“She was so happy. She shared this exciting event with everyone, and they were ecstatic. The dreamless princess finally dreams! From then on, she would tell her stories during meals until she couldn’t tell anymore. The end.”
“It is what it is. It’s the end,” Wanshi picked up the boy and settled him near his friends, asleep in their bed.
“What?” The boy wiggled when Wanshi tucked him in, “that can’t be! Who made that stupid story?”
“Quiet. You’ll wake up the others,” he stretched, ruffling the boy’s hair before standing up.
The boy was clearly disappointed, the construct understood. Even he was wondering why the story ended like that.
“That sucked… Who even made that?”
“Sleep now.”
“I want to meet them! I want answers!”
Wanshi treaded carefully around the sleeping children and took the recording device, “hm, you can’t. They're busy.”
“Why not? At least tell me what the ending means.” He pouted, rubbing his eyes and nuzzling deeper into his pillow.
His yellow eyes fell on the half-asleep boy, his thumb stroking the device in his hand.
“The princess was daydreaming to dream. To tell stories.”
The boy yawned, “that doesn’t answer… the question…” He was finally asleep. Thank goodness.
Wanshi slowly left the tent, laying down on a crate beside where the children rested. Other constructs patrol the perimeter, looking for any sign of enemies. It was a still night.
As he lay on the crate, he closed his eyes and replayed the story, setting the recording device near his ear and putting in a minimum volume. He listened to the voice of the Commandant, telling him the story of one of their joint missions in the past that he secretly recorded.
I want to meet them! I want answers!
“Sorry, kid,” he mumbled, letting out another yawn.
“They no longer tell stories.”
~•~•~•~•~••~•~•~~
A little fun idea I incorporate in this drabble! In case you all are confused, Wanshi meant that the Commandant was like the princess.
The phrase "from then on, she would tell her stories during meals until she couldn’t tell anymore" figuratively described the Commandant. The Commandant that works for humanity until they can no longer work.
That's all! I hope you all enjoy this drabble!
#pgr#punishing gray raven#pgr commandant#punishing gray raven commandant#pgr wanshi#pgr reader#punishing gray raven reader#punishing gray raven wanshi#pgr angst#pgr no comfort
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January 5: Drawer Fic
I took a nap after work, which was a bad idea because I woke up at the time I should have been going to sleep. So. That's not great. I was really tired and also just generally kind of overwhelmed. I've been really good this week with, like, not being bothered by the sheer amount of STUFF and just sort of doing my best and then letting go. Even with all the office moving stuff on top of that. But I do think in general I was just getting worn down. Maybe that's just the nature of any full time job, even one you like, even one that's going well, even one that's not too arduous, even one you try to keep in perspective.
I could definitely feel work seeping into my thoughts even when I got home and so I just... I just wanted to rest. Close my eyes in a dark room. I guess I didn't trust anything to distract me enough.
I've been doing this thing where I write a little bit every night before bed--not these posts, but a fic that I'll just refer to as the Drawer Fic. It's been a long time since I wrote something fictional I had no intention of sharing with anyone ever. I'm allowing it to be bad. I'm allowing it to be embarrassing. I'm not writing it the way I usually write, in big chunks and with a timer, trying to get that perfect flow, but just lying in bed and pecking out words as fast or slow as they come to me. The goal has been 300 words a night--or rather, that the story advance in 300 word intervals each day, so if I start with say 700, I'd stop when I got to at least 900, etc. The story is the written down version of a little thing I had going in my head on the train. I had a different idea earlier that I was going to use for this purpose but this one was closer to the surface so I went with it instead. In my head, I wasn't thinking about it too much or about how it would translate to text; I was just sort of watching it unfold. I wish I could capture exactly that narrative and dialogue now but I know I can't; I was barely memorizing the general structure let alone the specifics. But I'm trying to be okay with that. The primary purpose here is to have something I look forward to at bedtime/something singular to focus on as I wind down. The secondary purpose is to have something to re-read later that's in the same family as this little fantasy story I'd otherwise totally forget. So far I'd say it's going pretty well.
Anyway, it's late. I want to hit my next multiple of 300, so I better do that quick and then sleep.
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This is part fourteen of my Chucky transfers his soul into a human at the end of Seed au! It’s quite similar to a request I got and am yet to write, but it’s slightly different. As with all fics in this au, up until the age of fourteen Glen and Glenda go by he/him and she/her respectively, but they’re sixteen in this fic. Ever since part nine or ten I’ve had this plot in mind, and I really like it, I hope you do too :).
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When the twins were young, they couldn’t fall asleep before they heard a bedtime story. Chucky was always on bedtime duty, and he couldn’t stand the picture books Tiffany had bought for the kids, so he’d tell them stories he’d made up (child-friendly, of course). Glen would always fall asleep first, but Glenda would stay awake in rapt attention until the story was done, a wide grin on their face.
This lasted up until the twins were ten. One night in August as Chucky sat down for the nightly ritual, Glenda tugged on his arm and softly said:
“Uh, Daddy? I think we’re just gonna go to sleep now, aren’t we too old for bedtime stories?”
And just like that, he knew they were growing up.
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Glenda liked listening to true crime podcasts. They’d sit with their earbuds in and scroll through their phone as the voices of fellow true crime enthusiasts blasted into their ears. Sometimes (when they could be coaxed back to the realm of the living by their father or sibling) they’d tell their family excitedly about the serial killer they were learning about that day.
Chucky didn’t mind it, his kid was learning about the all-time greats, his personal heroes. One time he even got to talk to his child about the man who had inspired his own love of killing: the man who’d killed his father. Obviously he didn’t mention that fact, but it was so great to share his passions with his child.
One day, Chucky was drinking a cup of coffee. It had been a long day, and he looked forward to sitting back and relaxing with a Netflix documentary about criminals. He couldn’t stand podcasts, he liked looking at stuff, not just listening. But since when was he ever allowed to just relax? Just as he got settled, Glenda walked into the room and sat down next to him, phone and earbuds in hand. When they glanced up at their father they gave him an odd smile, and Chucky instantly felt unsettled.
“I’ve just been listening to a podcast.”
…Okay, where was Glenda going with this?
“Is it a good one?”
Glenda smirked and nodded as Chucky took a sip of his drink.
“Oh yeah, it’s about this serial killer from the eighties who went around strangling people. His name was Charles Lee Ray.”
Chucky spat out his coffee, beginning to choke. There was always a possibility that there’d be a true crime episode about him, but he’d never expected that Glenda would listen to it. Then again, why wouldn’t they? They’d listened to almost every true crime episode in existence, even from the obscure podcasts with one or two subscribers. Still, he had to play it cool, maybe Glenda was just telling him about the episode they’d watched? Maybe there wasn’t any deeper intentions? Clearing his throat, he tried to play off the choking with a casual question.
“Learn anything interesting about him?”
This question had multiple purposes. The first purpose was (obviously) to try and hide the fact that he was in fact Charles Lee Ray. The second purpose was, well… Chucky wouldn’t deny that he was slightly vain, he wanted to know what the world thought about him after his ‘passing’. With an impossibly wider grin, Glenda began to talk.
“He was born in New Jersey and killed his mom when he was seven. His dad- get this- was killed by the Hackensack Slasher from one of the other podcast episodes I listened to! He died in a toy store and some kid went crazy and thought his doll was possessed by Charles Lee Ray’s soul.”
So far so good. That was all correct information (apart from the assumption that Andy went ‘crazy’) Glenda didn’t seem to suspect a thing. But he decided to continue his questioning, because this was actually a really nice conversation.
“Anything else?”
Glenda moved closer to him, and there was a few moments of direct eye contact, neither person blinked. Chucky was still feeling quite unnerved, especially when Glenda’s smile revealed teeth, sharp like a tiger’s.
“I have it on pretty good authority that he’s a great dad.”
Chucky fell off his chair in shock. Glenda knew? How could they know? Calm down Chucky, he thought, maybe it’s just a theory that they heard? Maybe they’re messing with you? But Glenda wouldn’t be so cruel, they must actually know. But there was always hope. Getting up from the floor and sitting back down, he asked the question that contained the last of his hope.
“Oh really? Did he have kids then?”
Glenda’s expression turned grim, and slightly pensive.
“Yep, twins, both non-binary. The older twin’s okay, but I hear the younger twin is super awesome and cool, every sixteen year old wants to be like them.”
Glenda knew. But how? Chucky needed to find out.
“Glenda… I don’t understand, are you suggesting that-‘
“I’m not suggesting anything Dad, I know.”
There was no way around it now.
“How do you know? Even better, how much do you know?”
Glenda sighed before biting their lip nervously.
“Not much. You talk in your sleep a lot, and sometimes when you take naps in front of me I can hear you whispering to yourself about ‘Andy Barclay’ and ‘why a doll?’ So I pretty much joined the dots from there. I also found the doll from the old legends up in the attic a few weeks ago, that, coupled with the fact that Charles Lee Ray practiced voodoo and the additional fact that you share a name with him, it wasn’t hard to work out. I was hoping you’d tell me more.”
He had such a smart kid. He wouldn’t have been able to work all of that out at Glenda’s age, in a way he was proud of them. He’d always intended to tell them when they were old enough, surely sixteen is the right age to tell them? He wouldn’t tell Glen, the poor kid wouldn’t be able to take it, but Glenda was a lot like him, they deserved to know the truth. With a heavy sigh, he took his child’s hand and resigned himself to a long and uncomfortable talk.
“What do you wanna know?”
Glenda’s reply was immediate.
“Everything. I want to know why you gave up literal infamy to settle down in Suburbia and raise a family. I want to know if I was a doll too, and Glen. There’s so much in our lives that’s never made sense, if you have the answers, please tell me.”
Chucky closed his eyes for a moment, and opened them to find that Glenda was close to tears, wrapping an arm around their shoulder he began.
“I wanted to be a dad. It’s not fun running all the time, from the cops, from Andy Barclay, from Jennifer Tilly and her assistant even. I wanted you and Glen to have a good life, the sort of life I couldn’t provide if I was stuck in a little doll body. Yes, you and Glen were both born as a doll- one doll. Your mother was a doll too, we got in a fight in 1998 and I knocked a toaster into her bathtub before transferring her soul into a doll. Moments after you were born your mom and I… died. We were brought to Hollywood and turned into animatronics to be used in a movie based on the urban legend of Chucky the killer doll. Jennifer Tilly was playing your mom, but we had no idea you two even existed because some British guy stole you the night you were born and raised you as a puppet. You were five years old when you decided to come to America on your own to find us. Admittedly I didn’t have the best reaction. I believe my exact words were that your doll vessel had ‘fell off the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down’, so sorry about that. Long story short, your mom transferred her soul into Jennifer Tilly who looked extremely like her, I transferred my soul into her chauffeur Stan and immediately changed my name back to my actual name because there was no way I was living the rest of my life as Stan. I impregnated Jennifer Tilly before I transferred my soul into Stan and she/your mom gave birth to twins who became the hosts to you and Glen. That’s probably why you don’t feel entirely whole, because you were born into one body. I always meant to tell you the truth, but it was never the right time, I’m so sorry I hid all this from you, good job finding it all out on your own. Please don’t hate me for not telling the truth, I just wanted you both to be happy, you can understand that, right?”
Glenda blinked in astonishment and nodded slowly, eyes glistening with tears. They squeezed their father’s hand with a soft smile.
“I’m not happy that you hid all this stuff from me, but I wanna know more, and this is a good start.”
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Glenda didn’t listen to true crime podcasts anymore. Instead, when they were bored, they’d sit down with their dad and listen to his stories from life in the eighties, gore and all.
#chucky#chucky series#childs play#bride of chucky#seed of chucky#charles lee ray#tiffany valentine#chiffany#glen ray#glenda ray#horror#fanfiction#human au
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From Grief to Growth: the Catalyst for Life's Greatest Changes
Ramadan, a month of contemplation, spiritual growth, and self-reflection, holds a special place in the hearts of millions of Muslims around the world. It's a time when we focus on our relationship with Allah, try to improve our character, and seek forgiveness for our sins. And for many of us, it's also a time of physical rest and rejuvenation, a time to recharge our batteries for the spiritual journey ahead.
During the day of Ramadan, when the scorching sun beats down on us, and our bodies crave a moment of respite, lying down for a while seems like the perfect remedy. I close my eyes, feel the coolness of the air on my skin, and let my minds drift away. Thankfully, if I can sleep for 1-2 hours, even though it is not recommended because it's easy to oversleep until Asr and wake up feeling dizzy. So, scrolling through Instagram is something to do when lying in bed.
One day, while scrolling through Instagram during my brief nap, I came across a story that shook me to my core. It was about someone I didn't know personally, but their story left an indelible mark on me. The person had passed away while sleeping in the days leading up to Eid. Suddenly, the fear of death that I had been suppressing for so long overwhelmed me. It was the third time I had heard the news of someone's passing, and each time it felt more real and more terrifying.
Since then, bedtime has become the scariest time of the day for me. As we drift off into a peaceful slumber, a nagging fear lingers at the back of our minds. I'm afraid of not waking up again, of leaving behind unfinished business, of not having enough time to repent for my sins. What if I don't wake up again? What if my time has come, and I'm not ready to face our Creator? These thoughts weigh heavily on my heart, reminding me that death is always lurking around the corner, waiting for its chance to claim me. And so, every night, I cry myself to sleep, praying for forgiveness and asking Allah to protect me from an untimely death.
When I wake up, I always look for studies by Syaikh that discuss death. I wonder, is it really better to fear or hope for death? Or is this feeling of fear of death actually good or not? Because when I read stories of my friends, they really wish for death, while the fear that I feel makes me hope to be kept away from death, as far as possible that God could do for me. This growing fear is so intense that I told Umi, even though I am the type of person who finds it difficult to convey what I feel to other people. Maybe this can describe how scared I was at that time.
But as the days go by, I realize that this fear of death can be a powerful motivator for change. It can push us to be better, to do better, and to live our lives with purpose and intention. And during Ramadan, when our spiritual senses are heightened, this fear can become a golden opportunity for us to do more good deeds, seek forgiveness, and make the most of our time on this earth.
The fear of death can also remind us of the impermanence of this world and the fleeting nature of our existence. It can be a wake-up call to reduce our sins, to leave behind disobedience, and to strive to be on the path of righteousness. As the Prophet shallallahu ‘alaihi wasallam said,
ﺃَﻛْﺜِﺮُﻭﺍ ﺫِﻛْﺮَ ﻫَﺎﺫِﻡِ ﺍﻟﻠَّﺬَّﺍﺕِ ﻳَﻌْﻨِﻰ ﺍﻟْﻤَﻮْﺕَ
"Increase in remembrance of the breaker of pleasures, that is, death." (Narrated by Tirmidhi)
Through the lens of this fear, we can see the world in a different light. We can appreciate the beauty of Allah's creation, knowing that our time here is limited. We can be grateful for the blessings that we have, cherishing them as precious gifts from our Creator. And we can use our time, talents, and resources to make a positive impact on the world, leaving behind a legacy that will continue to benefit others long after we're gone.
Sheikh Abdul Aziz bin Baz rahimahullah explained the meaning of the hadith listed previously:
الموت، يعني: اجعلوه على بالكم كثيرًا حتى تعدوا العدّة، والهادم: القاطع؛ لأنَّه يقطع اللَّذات في الدنيا، ولكنه يُدني من لذَّات الآخرة، ويُقرِّب من لذَّات الآخرة،
"The purpose of remembering death is to make it often come to mind in our minds so that we prepare provisions. The meaning of the 'breaker' is to decide the delicacy in this world and bring it closer to the delicacy in the hereafter." (Syarh Bulughul Maram, Book of Al-Janaiz)
In the end, the fear of death is not something to be feared. Rather, it is a reminder of our mortality, a catalyst for change, and a call to action. May we all use this fear to fuel our passion for good deeds, and may Allah grant us the strength to make the most of every moment that we have.
Aamiin ya Rabbal alamin
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i remember being young and holding onto my dad’s hand. i felt the way his skin was coarse and calloused - i couldn’t tell if it was from age or his guitar, and it’s contrast from my untainted, inexperienced hand. etched into his skin was decades of hard work, dedication, and pain. to me, my dad was just that: my dad. he was put onto this earth with the sole purpose of pushing me on the swings and tucking me into bed. the harsh spankings and raised voice were bundled into the package. it was normal; it was routine.
that was, until, i got older. my dad was distant yet present. he is my number one supporter, but from the sidelines. i’m sure he has felt it from my end, too. the only words i mumble to him are quick ways to end conversation, although not my intention. when he looks at me, it feels detached, like i’m not the same girl he used to read bedtime stories to.
i became aware of his trauma. the environment he was raised in was haunting, and uncovering truths about his past changed him - just like anyone. i understood his learned pain, and how he was taught to punish his child. the hurt and the ache from those years as a kid felt silly to me now - silly to feel upset by it, at least. he was just a kid, too. he didn’t ask to be raised that way. is it when i learned the truth about him he stopped seeing me as innocent? did his past taint his perception of me?
i wonder when my dad stopped seeing me as his little girl, and instead, just his daughter, but to me, i can’t see my dad as my father, yet.
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OH YES. Sometimes while reading comments at Tiktok I can't help but question WHERE did these movie fans got that "book information" they're talking so confidently about. Because this looks like someone got this quote from someone who read the book ten years ago when they were five as bedtime story and haven't reread at since and then that someone told that to someone and THAT someone posted this info under random movie-related video as a "fan fact" and from there the rumour spred. Because some of them are absolutely random and have little to no connection from what happened in the book or lacking all possible context.
(the only one I have sinned with is that I sometimes joke about Howl invading taxes but more as a funny headcanon that anything else cause the book didn't even mentioned taxes once. That would be no less funny If he had to pay taxes for all four houses he uses for portals — especially knowing one of them in an drastically different currency which he literally cannot earn because HE DOESN'T HAVE ANY ACTUAL INCOME IN WALES. Absolutely hilarious)
Other popular miscomprehensions I saw people talking about:
1. Howl being instead of "soldiers" in the movie.
This one is lacking context so badly: yes, they wanted to make him a better person to the point they completely erased his actual first appearance, making him look like a hero instead of random slightly strange man and yes they were afraid to show him in any negative situation, and yes it gives me a laugh everytime I watch the movie but Howl wasn't even NEARLY as creepy as the soldiers. Quite contrary: it was a pretty normal thing for man at a time in May Day to go and court girls at the main square, wich is underlined at the text previously. The second he heard that Sophie is not interested and she's just going to see her sister he let her do so. He wasn't pushing, nor he was trying to insult her. Quoting:
"Then by all means do so," [he laughed] "Who am I to keep a pretty lady from her sister?"
And when she said now to his sincere and kind offer of accompanying her on the way Lettie, he didn't object either.
This doesn't make this moment less awkward for Sophie sure and that's also — shocking — not trying to show Howl as hero of any sort (calling her "a little mouse" was not the best choice of words), but it didn't intend to show Howl as a full-blown weirdo either. What it does it is simply plays with our expectations of the mc meeting her love interest and sets up Howl as a flawed character. Flawed, yet not absolutely villainous.
2. Howl was cheating on Sophie while they were together
That claim is fully impossible. First of all, they got together on about three very last pages on the book. You cannot cheat on someone you weren't even dating. Yes, he was seeing other woman, but he was doing that way before Sophie came. That waa never shown as a good or positive trait of his — If you're gonna use Howell Jenkins as a role model in any possible situation, then maybe you didn't get his character quite as much.
And, ironically enough, after Sophie came almost all of his courting was from investigation purposes only — whether it was his courting of Lettie with ended up forming around getting information about Sophie or his courting of miss. Angorian who ended up being a literal fire demon and Howl clearly suspected it from the early on.
When he actually marries to Sophie in the next two books he shown no intention to cheat on her whatsoever and stays loyal. Hell, they ever had a kid after whom — even in his own ways — Howl looks after. Never ever in any line in CiTA or HoMW there's a single word or rumour about Howl seeing other women while being married to Sophie. And If you think he'd do so just because he was a courting mess in the first book, then you're the one making random illogical conclusions.
Yes, Howl is a mess, a dork, an idiot and a loser, who was a womaniser for the biggest part of his life, but If there's one single thing that actually changed about him from start to end of HMC is that fell in love with Sophie Hatter very, very hard.
3. Sophie hating Howl (or otherwise Sophie and Howl being 10000% toxic and abusing one another)
This deserve a full another post, but to make story short both of their characters simply wouldn't allow them to being nearly as horrible as TikTok HMC book experts say. Sophie argues with Howl not because he is the most horrible man alive (although he IS giving her trouble and she's completely great with it. She agrees to marry this man fair and square), but because she's argumentative and bossy and angry by her nature. That's her character. That's who she is. There's hardly a single character in this book she didn't argue or at least tried to argue with. Her whole arc is about accepting herself for what she feels and who she is and learning to express these emotions without fear. Howl knows this and Howl knows her. He lets her argue because he loves Sophie for who she is — and she is an argumentative, stubborn woman. And there's nothing bad about being stubborn, nor argumentative.
And If you want Sophie to broke up with Howl because he "makes her argue more" you simply want to set her back to that scared, deeply saddened and exploited person she was at the start.
And finally — HMC is NOT your quide to romance. It's not "100 right ways your relationship should look If you want to be happy". They're meant to show love as it is. And love is flawed, love is crazy, love is a place where anyone can find a person for themselves no matter who they are. They don't have to show love the way you show it or the way you want. If you look at them bickering all the time and looking at magic explosions going around and go "that's not what I'd want in MY relationship" you're good! You're valid! I probably wouldn't be able to be in this kind relationship myself. But I'm not Sophie. Not Howl. If you want too look up how perfect healthy relationships should look, go search literature on that topic. It's doesn't mean they're inheretly toxic.
HMC shows love and it does it great — If it's not your type of love love, simply don't view it as a guide for you. HMC is not written for 5-year olds, it's written for ages nine and up and sometimes even considered as a YA — in Ukraine this book is given to us by the school curriculum no later than we reach 13, so no, it's not gonna teach children toxic relationships. Simply because it's not actually toxic.
But I said if he and Calcifer were staying, then so was I, and couldn’t he put a spell on me that would simply make the djinn not notice I was there? And we argued about that—”
Lettie chuckled. “Now, why doesn’t that surprise me?” she said.
Sophie’s face became somewhat pink,
This quote brings it somewhat perfectly. Here she's talking about arguing with Howl and when Lettie notes that the woman is BLUSHING.
Sophie and Howl were living—somewhat quarrelsomely, it must be confessed, although they were said to be happiest that way—in the moving castle again.
And If it doesn't reassure you, here's another quote. If someone says there's toxic again I'll start damaging something.
I'll finish it here for today but I swear there's so much more one post wouldn't be enough. People who say the won't/scared to read books because of this hurt my soul
If I see one more person saying that the castle moves in the book because Howl is evading taxes I'm gonna force every Ghibli fan to READ THE BOOK. Or at the very least not post about it online.
For all we know Howl pays MORE taxes as a result of having multiple residences and living in TWO UNIVERSES.
This also applies to people who say Diana Wynne Jones was Welsh, or the striking amount of people with the false recollection that she came up with the claim that the movie is how Howl tells it, and the book is how Sophie tells it.
These people spread rumours better than Michael in Market Chipping.
#hmc book#hmc movie#howl's moving castle book#howell jenkins#howl pendragon#sophie hatter#howl's moving castle#hmc#analysis
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im very sleepy rn but im still BRAINROTTING unfortunately SO sleepy venti hc rambles that spiral out of control yet again
- deep sleeper. my guy just straight up slept 500 or so years and only got up bc his bestie needs him. he will sleep through anything and everything, just straight up goes into a coma everytime. you know those small "just 1 hour" naps you do but end up sleeping for 6 hours straight. that's venti. and 6 hours is already a short nap for him compared to his uh... centuries long naps
- with that being said. you'll have to be the lighter sleeper between you both. or else you'll both miss everything you're supposed to do the next day. if you're also a pretty deep sleeper. set up alarms every 5 fucking mins. force yourself to wake up because venti will absolutely NOT be waking you up. keep that alarm outta reach otherwise he'll knock it over and then you'll lose an alarm clock and maybe today's pay if u miss ur shift.
- he's a very stubborn lil guy, and even moreso when he's sleepy. will get you to stay in bed with him for "just 5 more minutes, love?" but NEVER EVER fall for it, it's a TRAP!!!!! he can sleep the whole day away and he's got a pretty strong grip on you that's really hard to shake off (remember: he's still an archon! he's more powerful than he looks, and helloooo, he's an archer, he's got pretty strong arms even without his status as an archon).
- you'll never really be sure if it's intentional or not, though. he's very mischievous, but i like to think sleepy venti throws most (if not all) of his teasing and mischief out of the window. if u try asking him when he's awake and he'll reply with some teasing remark and you'll think he was doing it on purpose but sometimes... he just looks really really sleepy enough so maybe his brain isn't awake enough for mischief just yet?
you'll never get a straightforward answer from him eitherway. brat likes to keep u on ur toes in the strangest of ways, for the strangest of reasons
- for all of his shenanigans, if you're looking for a good night's rest, venti Does make for a very very good cuddle buddy. 10/10 very snuggly, i just think he gives the best hugs in general, so naturally he's also a good cuddle buddy. he'll likely hum a little lullaby too, and perhaps indulge you on a bedtime story should u ask for it.
- loves any sleeping position that involves you being in his arms, but is particularly fond of either of you resting your head on the other's chest! it's incredibly comforting to him to hear the steady beat of your heart, he thinks of it like your own personal lullaby for him, a gentle reminder that you're right there and that you won't fade away. (if he's still feeling a bit cheeky, he might tease you and delight in the way your heartbeat speeds up.)
- i think. maybe. venti has trouble falling to sleep but when he does manage to fall asleep he's just completely passed out like i talked abt earlier. don't ask me why, maybe i'm self projecting, who's to say.
i like to think that he's either purposely prolonging his sleep (maybe he still has some energy he'd like to burn off first?) or he just has a lot of stuff in his mind that keeps him wide awake
keep in mind that he leads a rather lonely existence. for all his merrymaking and mischief in the day, all of it evaporates at night and all that's left is the heavy burden of his existence. he's lived for 2,600 years, maybe even more, and a lot has happened since then. not only that, but he's mondstadt's archon, and most of his own people are blissfully unaware that he's there.
and because he's really got no one else to talk about it with, naturally he'll keep it all on his head, thinking about it over and over and over until he can't even keep his eyes open anymore and he finally decides to go and sleep it off, hoping he won't end up dreaming about his troubles—not when he tried his best to stay up til he's too sleepy to.
(sidenote, and maybe i'm just a bit delusional. but is that maybe why he's eager to offer up his company to us, so he won't have to be alone and think about things?)
- okay i'll leave one more lighthearted soft one to recover from the accidental minor angst i just did aha whoops
- he's very fond of helping you prepare for bed. he'll do your bedtime routine with you, whether that's bathing together, helping you wash your hair and back, brushing your hair, skincare routine... even picking out your pjs for you (and he'll insist on matchies just because you'll both look so cute together!!!)
- it's very soft and intimate, mixed in with his signature playfulness. he just really enjoys taking care of the people important to him, most especially his beloved! it becomes one of his most favorite things to do with you <3
- as much as he loves taking care of you, return the favor as much as you can please! he deserves to be the one pampered too, and it's a surefire way to get him to melt and become putty in your hands.
(when you do, pay special attention to his hair. he really loves when you run your hands through it, and it gets him extra !!!! when you brush his hair for him and undo his braids so his hair can rest and breathe too.)
okay um. i think thats it. im at my limit and im close to passing out myself. does it make sense? idk and idc. gn to yall and to venti
#venti#venti x reader#genshin impact x reader#venti fluff#genshin venti#what else am i supposed to tag this as actually#i forgot my brainrot tag.....#i lied btw i do care if it made sense LOL
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from The UK Times...
Harry and Meghan drive their point home with far slicker PR
Hilary Rose
Monday April 18 2022, 12.01am, The Times
And so the latest installment of the Harry and Meghan show returns to California, royal connections burnished, Netflix paymasters gleeful, and Slava Ukraini, obviously, as Meghan said in her inevitable turn centre stage. She is due to fly home today, with Harry following later, after she has read her children’s book to some kids there. It was billed on publication last year as her “first” book — shoot me now — and if I did its PR I’d bill it as the ultimate bedtime story, guaranteed to put your kids to sleep in no time, or your money back. In case you’ve forgotten, and alas I cannot, it’s about a bench, and has all the wit, verve and narrative arc you’d expect of a piece of furniture.
Nevertheless, the fact is that the H&M show is now a slick, nimble, multimillion-dollar money-making operation. They’re working what they’ve got, and who they know, to the nth degree. In comparison, the royal family’s PR strategy looks like it was patched together in a leaky ballroom by men in suits, and I say that as someone with a weakness for the royal family and, indeed, men in suits. Look, I don’t work in PR. I have no idea how you position and strategise a royal family modelled on service in the celebrity-obsessed 21st century and the age of the internet. But if you throw enough money at the problem, there must be someone who does? The Sussexes are effectively pulling the rug from under the Cambridges’ feet. The H&M show is what you get with a big budget for the most ferocious PRs, which for the past few days has been essentially a series of “happy coincidences” and public displays of affection, bathed in spring sunshine. Extending an olive branch to the royal family just before the PR extravaganza that is the Platinum Jubilee, for example. Invictus coming hot on the heels of the happy coincidence that their PR agency, Sunshine Sachs, also did the PR for an event at which they were given an award for “distinguished public service”.
Or take that photo op at Invictus, of H&M driving mini Land Rovers with kids. Am I alone in detecting the whiff of a dig at the Cambridges, after their Land Rover PR debacle on the recent tour of Jamaica? They inspected local troops there wearing uniform (him), hat (her), standing up in a Land Rover that had been used for the same purpose 60 years ago by the Queen. Their intentions were presumably to honour the Queen, but in 2022 the optics were, as they say, unfortunate, and no amount of courtiers saying the Jamaicans asked them to do it changes the fact that somebody should have had the nous to say “no”. Put Harry and Meghan in jeans, on the other hand, grinning in toy Land Rovers? Bingo. And finally, what a lucky coincidence once again that the next brickbat due to be lobbed by the couple, Harry’s autobiography, will only be published later in the summer. Any Jubilee photo ops will be safely in the can, Netflix may have its balcony money shot, and Harry and Meghan will be back home in California speaking truth to Oprah. The latest installment of the H&M show is now over. It won’t be the last.
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ᴋᴀᴇʏᴀ, ᴄʜɪʟᴅ��, ᴠᴇɴᴛɪ, xɪᴀᴏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴀʟʙᴇᴅᴏ ᴀꜱ ᴘᴀʀᴇɴᴛꜱ (ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴀʀᴛɴᴇʀꜱ)
characters x gn!reader, modern AU
a/n: this wasn’t edited/proof read so I apologize if there are any errors
warnings: none
requested by no one
tagging @genshin-obsessed (heyyy pocket lmao- 🍷❤)
Tip jar
Kaeya → the cool dad
He’s a very chill parent (pun intended)
Has rules but is very loose with them
Just cause he’s the cool parent doesn’t mean he’s not strict at times (he can be very strict if needed)
He’s a very affectionate and doting parent, always showering the kids with love and hugs
Spoils both you and the kids, he can’t help it cause he just loves you guys so much
All of your kid’s friends call him dad and constantly say they wish they had a cool dad like Kaeya
Always willing to drive the kids somewhere or take them out for a day if you need a break
He still makes sure you two get alone time together and takes you on dates frequently
Sneaks kisses whenever he can. A peck on your cheek or your lips, he also loves seeing your reaction to his surprise kiss
Family game night is a tradition for your family and Kaeya is the king of losing on purpose to make is kids smile
He absolutely loved playing with kids when they were younger and you still often find them playing fighting in the backyard when they come to visit
He really tries to be the best father he can and sometimes puts way to much pressure on himself
Loves styling the kid’s hair and will let them play with his hair. Sometimes you'll walk downstairs and be greeted by Kaeya with a head full of bows, hair clips and mini ponytails.
Whenever the kids would have nightmares he’d go into their room and fight the “nightmare” monster. He’d come out of the room 3 minutes later and tell the kids he beat it with his super awesome sword skills
Childe → the tries too hard to be hip and trendy with kids dad
First off he is a very doting dad, he loves his children so much and calls them his precious babies and often says he cannot live without them
He’s very much a *ahem* malewife *AHEM* (don’t try to change my mind, it will not change no matter what you say). Even though he’s hella rich he wants to spend all the time he can with his kids.
He cooks, cleans, packs the kid’s lunches in the morning and makes sure to give you a kiss whenever you return home from work and say “How was your day at work babe?”
He really, and I mean really, tries to be cool with kids. Spends time looking into “the latest and hip’ trends that all the kids are hopping on. They thought he was the coolest when they were younger but now they call him cringe and say he’s trying too hard and that he’s cool just the way he is.
It broke his old man's heart when they said it to him the first time and he cried for 30 minutes straight, you made them apologize to him even though you know they meant no ill intentions. Now calling him cringe is a family joke :)
Encourages the kids to learn something that will “help them wins fights and emerge victorious from all the battles they fight”
You put a quick stop to that and told the kids that they can do any activities they want
He’s still very supportive of what they choose to do and will always be their number one supporter
He’s a big cuddler and often initiates family cuddle piles.
Venti → wine dad
Chill dad #2. He wants his kids to be free and be who they are. You still set some basic ground rules for them.
Very doting and affectionate and will always give you and the kids all his love
Stopped drinking as much when they kids were born/adopted
He acts like a wine aunt (hence wine dad)
LOVES reading the kids bedtime stories but this also became a family activity since you’d always accompany him. He’ll also sing them lullabies and he’ll sing you lullabies every night too
Even when your kids are older he’ll still read them stories and sing to them.
Doesn’t really like to do household chores but he’ll do them for you (He will complain though)
He does enjoy cook though and likes to help make dinner for special occasions/holidays
He will teach his kids how to play instruments and sing. He won’t force them into it but wants them to at least try it
Get’s pouty if the kids get taller him and will tell them to stop growing or he’s gonna steal their height
Another family tradition you guys have is weekend picnics. Venti usually chooses the location because he somehow finds all the prettiest places in town. He would tell the kids it was his magic talent when they were younger.
Encourages the kids to go to summer camp so they can “build unforgettable memories and be closer to nature. (But really he just wants to have some alone time with you)
Xiao → the emo dad
On the outside he seems cold and very un-affectionate but oh boy he’s quite the opposite
He’s willing to do anything for you and the kids because you guys are the most important things in the world to him
He’s also somewhat of a malewife too but it was completely his choice. He just wanted to take care of his family.
He doesn’t like it when you come home from work and start doing chores. He’ll force you to sit down and relax. He’ll say that he’s got everything under control and there no need for you to stress yourself over chores
The main way he shows you and the kids affection is through acts of service.
Like I said before he’ll do the majority of the household chores, the kids also have their few assigned chores (and you help out with chores if he lets you)
He’ll help the kids with their homework, make them lunch, read them bedtime stories, brush their hair for them, take care of them when they’re sick, ect.
Only shows a limited amount of affection in public. He’ll hold your hand and carry the kids but that’s about it
In private however he is willing to accept all the affection you and the kids give him
He often struggles helping his kids out when it comes to emotional problems/issues but he always does his best. He’s always there to a lend an ear
He’s not vocal about it or always showing it but he’s your guy’s number one supporter.
Evening walks after dinner is a family tradition you guys have had ever since the kids started walking.
When they were young he’d let them sit on shoulders and would give them piggyback rides
He can be very strict and overprotective sometimes but that’s just cause he wants the best for his kids
Albedo → the art dad
He may not be the best at giving affection but he is a very supportive and doting dad
He likes draws pictures for the kids, even when their older he still does because he said seeing their smile when he give his art to them is a very special and happy feeling that he never wants to go away
Helps out with household chores but absolutely despises mopping.
He’s always there to listen to the kids talk about their latest obsessions/interests
He’s not very good at comforting but he really does try too
Makes you guys take family photos every so he can paint them later
Teaches the kids about art and alchemy if they show interest in either
When they were young he used to make kid safe experiments for them
Road trips are a family tradition. Albedo enjoys them cause he gets to draw the pretty scenery and thinks it’s one of the best to to spend quality time with family
He wakes up like a mom so whenever the kids would wake him when they’d have a nightmare he’d get startled and almost launch himself out of bed with a high pitched screech
Encourages the kids to have playdates with their friends often (he actually just wants more alone time with you)
He’s also the type of parent that draws on the walls with the kids when he finds them doing it. And yes he doesn’t care if they’re using sharpie he’ll still join in. Yes you’ve scolded all them multiple times and no they never learn their lesson, Albedo too. He always promises that he’ll “clean” it up which results in most of the wall in the house being murals cause his “cleaning up” is just him painting over it.
#genshin impact#genshin impact headcanons#genshin impact x reader#gn!reader#genshin impact kaeya#kaeya alberich#kaeya x reader#genshin kaeya#kaeya headcanons#genshin tartagalia#genshin childe#tartagalia x reader#childe x reader#childe headcanons#genshin venti#venti x reader#venti headcanons#genshin xiao#genshin xiao x reader#xiao x reader#xiao headcanons#genshin albedo#albedo x reader#albedo headcanons#kaeya x gender neutral reader#childe x gender neutral reader#venti x gender neutral reader#xiao x gender neutral reader#albedo x gender neutral reader#my writing
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lila had the same issues -- found sleep escaped her more often than not. it had driven her crazy in their first few years here -- trapped away from everything reasonable &* comfortable. she hadn't acknowledged the part of her that liked the danger. hadn't acknowledged the equal part of her that found she enjoyed five's company more than anything she'd enjoyed in the calm of domestic life either.
children &* husband waited somewhere out of this subway -- the longer away from them , the more she festered on how much freer she felt without them. how the rush of discomfort here was actually far more comfortable than the stability there for her. she's lived her whole life in a state of danger &* purpose &* freedom. that damned house had felt like a prison where she played dutiful wife &* mother. there was guilt there , of course. pain &* loss &* a knowledge that they were never getting out of here.
but there was also five. someone who knew far too well that instability was stability. it was known. calm was . . . anything but. they'd worked tirelessly for years. clawed &* fought &* suffered to get back to a family that would never understand them. they've never even thanked five once for his efforts. never even stopped to hug him. they'd all fallen into complacency while he &* lila made efforts to get them free of that wrongness that was the new timeline. diego was the worst offender of this -- found her more appealing in that guise of domestic wife &* mom. reminded her he hadn't liked her much when she was more herself. she had been fun , but she had not been the stability he craved. a stability she has tried to give him without considering herself for years.
so as five awakens from a restless dream , lila is there , deep gaze flickering over his face in the darkness around them. he touches her hand &* she is reminded in turn that he is all she has left in this world. the only one she would have from now until infinity. she is forced to face the knowledge that she doesn't hate the idea. that she might even enjoy this life with him. might want to find that stability in chaos at his side.
so she offers a faint smile from where she is laying beside him , propped up on her elbow as she lays on her side , facing him. ❛ want me to tell you a bedtime story ? those always work like a charm. ❜ her tone is teasing in the quiet , but her intentions are sweet for once. she hesitates , then wraps her hand around his own. comfort , in the dark. ❛ tell me about it ? ❜
𝙻𝙸𝙻𝙰 𝙿𝙸𝚃𝚃𝚂 / @poetarum said ❝ You look tired. More dreams ? ❞
The dreams were nothing new to him, nightmares of waking up back in the apocalypse wasteland he lived in for decades, alone without even Delores for company. He had had them often while working for the Commission, frequently in the early years of his contract but then they slowed down. Now stuck in the subway, they started up again. Sometimes he was back in his original apocalypse alone, other times he found his siblings, the worst dreams were the ones where something happened to Lila. He couldn't do it, he couldn't stand to be alone again, trapped here in endless torment. Alone again.
Five nods his head slowly, conforming her suspicion. Fingers reach out to her hand, he has to touch her for just a moment, to know that she's real. Hallucinations are no stranger to him. Relief washes over him when his hand touches her. He lets out a quiet sigh. ❝ I'll try to get some sleep again later. ❞
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I hope you’re having a great day Lena! I was just wondering if we could have any fluff facts about the shepherds as a whole! Like fun tidbits of how they interact with each other, what some of them do if they have the same day off, does anyone host weekly game nights?? I hope that makes sense! Reading the recent short story on Patreon I love seeing how the characters interact with one another and now I need moreeeeeee🙏
Ooh, great question! I’m feeling curiously tapped dry at the moment, so I’ll probably have to reblog this as more ideas come to me; I’m so happy you’re enjoying the short story, btw!! 💖
Some group dynamic headcanons:
Many of them steal clothes from each other. Briony wears a cute sweater of Shery's (she asked), Ayla gets cold so she just takes one of Red's jackets from a chair (she didn't ask), Chase gives Tallys his scarf one day and Riel corders Trouble a pair of gloves from a fashion line he favors because his old ones are holey and they get into an argument about it... This leads to some recruits mistakenly thinking that the captains are all involved in some sort of mass relationship because they keep walking out of each other's rooms wearing each other's clothes. (The recruits believe a lot of really dumb stuff, if you couldn't tell. They LOVE gossip. It's like a competitive sport in the compound)
There is a weekly card game night, initiated and organized first by Chase, but it grows bigger over time, with snacks, cakes, drinks, and new games being procured! I'd actually say it's more like every ten-fourteen days or so than on any set weekday, and is typically proposed by anyone who senses that they or others need to blow off some steam. They all tend to meet in a private common room and either just chill and play some card games and casually drink and listen to music, or they get LOUD and raucous and play more risque non-card games (like Question or Command/Truth or Dare). The loud nights are more like once a month or bi-monthly, though! They take place in the captains' lounge so dumb recruits don't get to join! It's rare that they're in there all doing the same thing, though: maybe half will be at the table playing card games while others will be broken up into smaller groups, say arm-wrestling in the corner or playing chess at the smaller table or reading, but they're all there! Game nights are almost never held unless everyone is there, which is extraordinarily difficult to schedule, but they all make an effort to make it happen--even those who first had to be dragged into it, like Blade or Riel!
Speaking of chess games, Red and Riel have a standing game where they complete at least four more moves every night that they're around and able to meet up after dinner. Planning their next move helps them both break up the monotony of the day, and it's something they enjoy immensely. However, whenever he gets called away on a mission, Red gets sick with worry that Riel's been cooking up all sorts of schemes while he's been gone, so sometimes on the road he has, like, a schematic that he doodles on trying to anticipate Riel's next move, and it's very nerdy and ramps up in joking Anxiety. Riel, graciously, goes easier on him on nights after he comes back from long trips, though he denies it
Similarly, Blade and Trouble have a standing training session once a week where they just beat the crap out of each other. This is generally where they do the majority of their talking
Briony and Ayla first had an agreement that they would get the other one up if they overslept (Briony tends to be the one who oversleeps while Ayla is better about being up at dawn, but Ayla is really grouchy if she went to bed late and Briony is the only one who can handle her), which morphed into doing runs and sparring together at dawn and having breakfast frequently!
The girls have a standing spa night once a month where they all get together in a room (usually Shery’s) and basically do sleepover stuff and relax and chat and catch up for a few hours. This also sometimes involves showing each other new outfits that they bought that month! Sometimes there are even group baths in the big common bath, but these are rarer because Shery is shy and Tallys doesn’t like sitting in hot water getting pruny
Chase and Trouble drag Red and Halek to go drinking with them around once a month; sometimes Blade is persuaded to go if Trouble can get the drop on him and punch him hard enough to wind him. It’s complicated
Riel and Shery, of course, have tea together once a week! You’re not allowed if you can’t bring a chill vibe (Riel’s rules). Tallys, Lavinet, Halek, and Red are occasional visitors; Briony is allowed on a good day. Blade would be allowed but he has 0 interest
Similarly, Lavinet hosts a weekly brunch, either in a courtyard or at some restaurant in town! Typically it’s a girl thing and Ayla, Briony, and Shery are the most consistent attendees, but Chase has snuck his way in there often, and Riel, Halek, or Red pop up occasionally!
Tallys and Halek cook together! It’s not all that often and doesn’t seem to have any set way of materializing--it just happens somehow--but they both very much enjoy it! Sometimes they cook dinner for the whole group and have a little dinner party that they both secretly get excited for! Sometimes Shery bakes the dessert!
Riel noticed that Tallys has a little garden that she spends time weeding, so he sends gardening tools or special seeds when he thinks she needs them and she leaves baskets of vegetables or vases of flowers in his office. All of this is done without exchanging a word
Chase sporadically teaches Briony acrobatics and things like tightrope walking, just randomly whenever they’re both idle. She teaches him how to gut people with bare fists and also sometimes they paint!
Caine caught Red grazing in the pantry late one night and now it’s like a Thing where they pass each other in the kitchen and Red sort of just looks the other way re: Caine’s bedtime and what on earth he’s doing up so late and Caine doesn’t tell anybody that Red is just absent-mindedly eating a loaf of bread at 2 AM because he was too busy working to remember to eat dinner. It’ll be like, “there’s some turkey leftover from dinner in the cold box” “oh hey, Caine. thanks. ...so, what’s the news from the midnight watch tonight?” “i’m going to go hunt ghosts on the seventh floor with my friends!” “...okay! have fun!”
Lavinet has a monthly shopping trip where she updates her wardrobe, and it is very common for others to accompany her around the city and just shop while they drop! Common partners are Shery, Briony, Riel, Chase, and once memorably Blade, who didn’t know what he was in for!
Trouble and Ayla are wildly competitive and keep arm-wrestling each other for money; this becomes a bi-weekly sporting event that is eagerly attended and bet upon by third parties
There was ONE group karaoke night. ONE. Most of them got so blackout drunk that they swore to never do it again. Even now, several of them go green whenever they hear a popular bar song (“Don’t Piss Where You Plant Your Flowers”) being sung, especially badly
The game of "telephone" gets really bad in their group. It's like, Shery will say to Briony that she's worried because she thought Riel looked a bit peaky and feverish. Briony will say in passing to Trouble that Riel is getting sick and Shery is worried. Trouble will say to Tallys that Shery is worried sick because Riel is bedridden. Tallys will be mixing herbs and Chase will ask what for and Tallys will reply that Riel is sick, but because she's mixing herbs, Chase will surmise that the sickness must be quite advanced, and will later say, "Damn, have you seen Riel? Seems like he's really sick." Red will interpret this as "I have seen Riel for myself and have determined that he's extremely ill." At least four people will bust into Riel's room, expecting him to be on the verge of death, despite the fact that they saw Riel that morning. Riel will be fine and very annoyed at the intrusion.
They rarely go out as a group to bars and establishments outside of the compound (too chaotic as well as risky, for one thing, and also, recruits don't need to see their superiors like hanging out of bushes and dancing on tabletops drunk out of their minds, and also, "Mages can't drink" (lol)), but when they do deem it a worthy occasion (Trouble's birthday, say), the girls are very punctual when getting ready, and the boys are almost always extremely late due to various shenanigans (Chase forgot that he put a booby trap on Red’s door, covering Red with flour, or a cat somehow slips into Trouble’s room and steals, like, a detonator or an important key, and they have to go chasing it across the city). This has led to the girls coming late on purpose in order to even out their arrival, but mysteriously, this has only led to even later start times, meaning they often don’t get started until like 10 or 11 PM when the most well-intentioned souls meant to be in bed by midnight... that never happens, either!
One such night once led to them ending up on a ridge in the Sun’s Embrace, like a mile outside of the city, in order to watch the sun rise together, because hiking in the dark while blasted out of their minds sounded like a really good idea. They all made it, and the dawn was spectacular, but the moment was ruined when Tallys said softly, “It’s the beginning of a beautiful new day--” punctuated by Trouble abruptly throwing up in a bush and Riel just flat-out passing out
#Shepherds of Haven#group#group dynamic#all characters#found family#drinking#cw: alcohol#drunk#shenanigans#party#parties#long#long post
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femslash february - day 5 - power
@witcherladiesamirite I've been dying to write this since I watched "A Grain of Truth" so here without further ado is a little Carmilla-esque Ciri x Vereena, cw for teen Ciri and Vereena being a semi-immortal being, they smooch.
Cirilla locked the door behind her and rushed as quickly as she could to slip off her filthy clothes. She'd stepped into the bath before she realized they were the last part of home she had with her, and now her tunic, chemise, trousers-- they were just tangled rags on the floor.
She sank into the water, easing her muscles, and began scrubbing the grime from her, starting with her hair and face, wringing muddy water from her lengths, and marveling as the water turned magically clear again. She began to relax, to take her time. And suddenly, as she scrubbed her neck, remembered throwing her head back and screaming. Remembered waking up alone, the body of the boy who'd betrayed her torn to shreds. The horse she'd stolen severed.
She shivered in the warm water and scrubbed and scrubbed.
There was nothing like a solid meal and a bedtime story to set one to rights. And as she lay in a warm, comfortable bed, her protector within earshot, a kind of contentment barricaded her heart.
And that's when she met Vereena, her strange eyes watching intently. Something about the intensity of her stare, the way she sized up every part of Ciri, made her heart race, and not with fear.
She felt a kinship with the girl who had to hide. She'd been that girl, just a week ago. Unable to tell anyone her real name. And even now... there was something crackling inside of her that scared her. Geralt told her she was special, more than just his Destiny, but he didn't know about this.
But Vereena sniffed it out with interest. Her difference. Her strangeness. Ciri watched the girl's eyes widen, her fingers tremble, and found she wanted her to come closer. She hadn't had many female friends in Cintra-- she never knew what to say. And suddenly she didn't have to say anything, Vereena was right beside her, her strange eyes so close (how much stranger than Ciri's own?), her lips wet.
When she kissed her, Ciri didn't freeze; she sighed. She didn't know what to do with her hands, but she felt Vereena's brush across her shoulders, felt one cradle her jaw.
Ciri had kissed someone before-- a boy she was friends with, on a dare. His lips were rubbery, and his breath was sharp, though she hadn't told anyone after.
Vereena's were soft and goading, and Ciri felt her breath go short as she leaned into her touch. She could feel her words in her mind, all around her, overwhelming her.
There's something beautiful within you, I can taste it.
Ciri whimpered, and her hands found their purpose, pulling Vereena's face to her desperately. She'd never met anyone like her before, never met anyone who could see her in this way, and the realization that she was here, kissing her, in her bed, was heady.
She felt Vereena's knee press between her legs and sat back with a gasp, her eyes wide and flustered by how much she wanted, like her body had a mind of its own, knew just what to ask for. But she didn't. And the separation, like that sleeping stranger inside her starting to wake, frightened her.
Vereena watched her closely, unnaturally still. Ciri felt her finger caress her cheek. She closed her eyes, and when she opened them just a moment later, the girl was gone, and Ciri wasn't at all sure this wasn't just a dream.
#ciri x vereena#cirilla of cintra#vereena#my fic#femslash february 2022#let ciri be a little lesbian challenge
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