#because you get juicy information by tending the bar | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

hazelfoureyes · 8 months ago

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A Doe in Fall (part 2)

I have a terrible case of the big bad sads so enjoy part 2 earlier than I planned

⟢HumanAlastor x FemaleBurlesquerReader - A Doe in Fall

Part 1 - Pretty in Red smut💦 Part 2 - Liar smut💦 Part 3 - A Tragedy smut💦 Part 4 - Enough Part 5 - Too Much Part 6 - Learning smut💦 Part 7 - Recognition smut💦 Part 8 - Trust sexual 🥵 Part 9 - Shiny Things Part 10 - Good Deeds Part 11 - Caught Part 12 - Eddie

Part 2 Liar

You not-stalk Alastor for weeks but don’t find anything blackmail worthy to grab ahold of. But luckily (?) for you, a chance encounter pulls you deeper into his hobbies and therefore his scope of fascination. Most importantly, do murderers go on dates?

「Warnings/Promises: Smut, HumanAlastor x FemBurlesquerReader, Alastor eats pussy like beignets (MESSY), dancing, shoe stress, murder, dead body, food metaphors, stalking, masturbation, Tommy is a bad dude, allusion to coerced prostitution, praise kink?, public sex acts, stage name is a fucking pun GOTCHU BITCHES, Gluttony」

minors dni please

The nights you didn’t work were spent casually looking for Alastor. Not stalking, just …. pursuing.

You found over the course of several weeks what places he never attended, and a few that he did like clockwork. As much as you wanted to approach him, you knew you’d end up checkmated again. You just wanted to observe the man, surely you’d see something you could use against him, something tangible.

What was he doing? Knife carrying smooth talker who fingers ladies in the park? There was more to him than you anticipated. That addictive adrenaline rush was calling you to chase him. You’d catch him in the act of whatever men like him did, and—- well, you’d figure it out then. Was he a mugger, maybe? The knife would make sense. But he disposed of bodies so well, a month and no mention of a corpse anywhere. You didn’t want to even touch the thought bubbling up in the back of your skull. It was getting louder and louder, heavier than the other thoughts.

A repeat killer.

You decided, somewhat foolishly, if he was a killer it would be best to know that information. So you needed to continue even if the cards all read death. Right?

Right.

For all his efforts, he hadn’t actually noticed you. While he tended to stay at the back of the room, you were always further back, on the balcony, at the bar. He went about enjoying his nightlife wholly unaware someone was watching. Because of this, he did things that were considered quite dangerous for a woman.

Many nights you found yourself alone in wooded areas. Well, “alone”.

During your casual stalking you found him to be quite pretty, in a sense. He walked smoothly, always had pressed and tailored suits. Slender fingers, wide shoulders, small waist. Fingers.

Many more nights you buried your face into your pillow and thought about his hands on you, his breath at your ear. His “Shhh.” You couldn’t replicate the feeling. No matter how you tried.

If all else failed, no juicy blackmail available, maybe just endear yourself to him. Bed him. Get the conquest done and let him go on with his little crime spree or whatever it was he was doing when you weren’t watching. Because so far all you’ve seen is a man who loves to dance and enjoys whiskey.

After another show done, body sore, you did your tour of the theatre. Tommy was snapping his fingers at you from the bar, his attempt to tell you to come over. Every day he seemed to become more and more brutish.

“What can I do for ya?” You tried to keep a bounce in your step, arches aching.

“I want you to meet someone.” Tommy turned to a small man at the bar, hair thinning and combed forward. You guessed in his sixties. “Give Mr. Wilson a warm welcome. He’s one of your most generous benefactors.”

You nodded, smile slipping as you mind started to consider what was happening. You had heard some girls were taking dates, offering private shows, but you had been under the impression that was entirely of their own free will and desire. Had Tommy turned pimp? Your gaze flashed to Tommy, his stare cold, and then back to the man. “Well, thank you very much doll! Pleasure to make your acquaintance, Mr. Wilson.” Tommy saw someone walk by and followed, leaving you with the older man.

“Your dance was something else, sweetheart.” You nodded, his hand coming to rest on your hip. “I bet those hips do more than dancing.”

Leaning in, you rested your hand on the hand he set on your hip and whispered into his ear, “Touch me again without my permission,” you lifted his tie, a flirtatious move to anyone watching, “And the next time you see this tacky tie, you’ll be shitting it out.” You patted his chest. “Excuse me, I’ll be right back.”

You pushed through the crowd and out of the front doors of the theatre. The air chillier tonight than past weeks. Looking around, you balled your fists. You wanted to hit something, break something.

Without any destination you tore off down the street, angrily huffing to yourself. You looked both ways to cross the intersection when you saw a familiar silhouette. A car honked, your hands coming up in apology as you finished crossing the street to follow Alastor.

Was your luck miraculous? Or malignant? You made it several blocks before a man stepped in front of you. You weren’t listening, trying to look past him to see where Smiles was headed.

“Will you fuck off?!” You pushed him out the way only to have him pull you back by the arm. Before you could let out your frustration, a stranger walked up to you both.

“Hands off, move along.” The stranger flashed his identification papers, making the offender leave quickly with his head down. “Miss you need to be careful out here. There’s been people missing from this ward. Pretty thing like you should be home.”

Your mouth formed various shapes, no words fitting.

“Detective Brady.” He handed you a card.

I don’t want this.

“Sure, thanks.” You snatched it with two fingers and practically jogged away. No sign of him, no indication where Alastor went. Were there any forested areas? He often took strolls in shady parks but you couldn’t remember any nearby. Turning around you realized how far you’d wandered from the fanfare and lights. The area was dark and deserted, not just Alastor but no one was around anymore. You stashed the card in your bra and rushed past an alley, giving up and deciding to just go home, when your ears caught the sound of dragging fabric on pavement.

Ice. Your blood chilled. Taking a few steps backwards, you turned to look into the darkened side street. You saw nothing, but heard a familiar wet sound.

Would it matter? Death?

You lifted your heels, walking on the balls of your feet to not make any sound as you approached the black shadow blanketing the majority of the side street.

A glimpse of brown leather shoes peeked into the light, soon your eyes adjusted as you too entered the inky darkness.

“I don’t care for liars.” Alastor was in front of you before you could even shout from shock. You looked around him to see a crumpled body on the ground and a black car.

“Is there a problem?” His eyes scanned your face, his usual smile no longer so inviting but instead manic and wide. You don’t know what possessed you, the adrenaline was flowing again and drowning out your more sensible thoughts.

Your eyes were locked on his golden brown stare, “Only… if you’re quite attached to his wallet.”

He burst into laughter, wiping tears with the back of his bloodied glove. A small smear of blood was left behind on his cheek.

“I have no need for it.” He reached down and fished it out of the man’s pocket, “And neither does he!”

You caught it with both hands, “Well doesn’t that make me the lucky lady of the evening.”

“Don’t speak too soon. I’m quite cross with you.” He gestured at you with the knife, “We had a deal.”

In what could best be described as an out of body experience you watched yourself rush to his side and lift the man’s legs, “In the trunk?”

Alastor stared at you, teeth showing as his smile grew, “I’ve seen films less entertaining than you.” A stifled laugh as he lifted the man from under his arms and you both carried him to the car. You dropped the legs with a loud thud, Alastor gently setting the man down and opening the trunk.

A waxed canvas was lining the inside, “Clever.” You hadn’t meant to say it out loud. He hummed happily at the compliment and you sank your teeth into the reaction. Everyone wants something; power, money, sex, praise. Find the right combination and even the toughest hearts would swing open.

After he tossed the man, the knife, and the gloves into the back, you reached for his hand. “Your wife is going to be miffed. Blood is so difficult to get out of cotton.” You scratched at the bit of blood that had stained his cuff. “Spit works really well. But lemon juice and baking soda before any store bought cleaners will help.”

Alastor took his hand back, adjusting his sleeve to hide the red spot, “Oh she has much bigger issues to deal with.”

Your mind raced. A chauvinist? Abuser? A weight settled into your stomach; disappointment. “Is that so?”

Giggling, he leaned against the bumper, one leg crossing in front of the other, “Considering she doesn’t exist, she’s quite terrible at laundry. And I haven’t eaten a meal in years.” A giggle devolving into a full chest laugh.

A terrible joke, you smacked his chest, “Cruel! Unfunny!”

“Perhaps I should eat you?” He leaned close.

“I hear I’m quite sweet.” You smirked, heart pounding in your chest with such force you were rocking slightly with each pulse.

Alastor felt his blood pressure rising. He should kill you. Just to be safe. But—- oh, this was so fun. You hid any fear you were feeling perfectly. He could be forgiven to think he was staring into a mirror. If he met himself in an alley, well, he would feel quite safe. Perhaps you we’re of a similar inclination?

He watched your throat as you gulped. You licked your thumb and wiped at his cheek, “You always make a mess, hun.”

Alastor felt the world spin as you then dragged your blood stained thumb over your lips, red lipstick smearing with it. “Sweet eno-,” he swallowed your words, hand coming to your neck and pulling you into the kiss. No patience, his tongue swiped over your mouth and plunged in at the smallest parting.

Your mind was screaming, finally, yes.

His tongue as soft as his hands rolled over your own, every time your mouths pulled away and drew back together was thinning your frontal cortex. Alastor could taste the faint metallic tinge of the man’s blood on your mouth, and he found his sleeping libido shiver awake. Always a fan of kissing, he now found his mind wandering to other parts of your body, other acts of affection, as he felt you’d call them.

No time. He pulled away, “Against the wall.”

You practically threw yourself into the bricks. Alastor pulled a gas tin from the trunk and began dousing the street. You frowned, body relaxing.

“You’re taking the food metaphor too far. Fire? Really?” You took a second to realize there was no odor.

A laugh in threes, “Water, dear.” You watched the blood thin and begin snaking down to the gutter. He set the can in the trunk and closed the hatch. After opening the drivers door he turned to you, “Do you trust me to drive you home?”

“Honestly, no.”

“That’s why I like you,” a wink. “Wear comfortable shoes tomorrow.” He flashed a smile, pushing his glasses up. Before you could question him he hopped into the car and drove off out of the back of the side street.

Alastor found himself singing a little louder as he drove home. A thrilling evening becoming somehow more exciting. He realized that always seemed to happen when you stumbled into his plans. Still annoyed you had followed him, his thoughts shifted to possibilities. A kindred spirit could make things easier. More fun. Safer. But who were you? Much like himself you wore a mask. He could see it clearly as it always began to slip in his presence.

He pulled his car behind his home, backed up against a large greenhouse. Still in the idling vehicle, his fingers came to his lips. What a peculiar creature you were. Killing the lights and letting his eyes adjust to the darkness, he considered what to do. The possibilities kept coming in waves. But he stopped himself, never one to live in fantasy. Helping toss a dead man into a car wasn’t the same as killing. Yes, you showed no outward concerns, but he couldn’t be sure you wouldn’t turn tail the second things got more intense.

He always took his time, sensing out those who were good candidates. The abhorrent, the abusers, the cruel. There was something so satisfying, deep in his gut, to watch a person with power over others cower in fear. The same eyes that relished in the pain they gave to those under their thumb shaking in realization the were now the prey. Begging for mercy they didn’t afford others. Alastor sighed. He remembered your pained sob in the park, frustration and disappointment at his lack of reaction. Eyes fluttering closed, if you had gotten in the car you’d not be disappointed in him now.

A deeper sigh. But you didn’t. Which was wise. He thought better of you for it. Opening his eyes and leaving the car, he went to the trunk to begin his work.

You couldn’t sleep. Not because of the dead man, you were getting used to that. It was the lack of information. Comfortable shoes? For what? He didn’t give you a time or place to meet.

Tomorrow was Sunday, you realized. Ah, the bar. That was the only place that would make sense.

Sundays were big nights for your theatre, but you weren’t needed unless a girl was sick. You simply weren’t at that level of fame for your little company and this was fine for you suddenly. You spent your Sunday pacing your small one room apartment and changing shoes.

What did Alastor have planned? With the little you knew about him it a could be a capital crime or a walk in the park. You genuinely couldn’t imagine and it was exciting. A normal man asking you—- was this a date? Was it presumptive to call it a date? You couldn’t quite see Alastor dating. You let the question go. Most men would take you for a movie and perhaps a chaste kiss at the door of a cab. With Alastor it could be literally anything. How do you dress for anything?

Your friend teased you, arriving early to her bar and chewing on your lip.

“So, either you suddenly wanna look nice for my dive, or you’re expecting someone.” She was wiping down the counter.

“I adore your customers, Betty.” You hopped from the seat, needing to reapply your lipstick.

Your singing voice was strained, nerves keeping you tense. Looking into the modest crowd you couldn’t find him. A cornflower yellow dress, a little too tight around your waist but you didn’t let that stop you. The collar a loose and folding slit from shoulder to shoulder, you were positively cute, he decided. Leaning at the bar he couldn’t see your face, but under the small lights you were glowing nonetheless. A little ball of pride rose in his gut, noticing you clearly had put more care into your appearance tonight than most Sundays.

Truth was he had enjoyed a whiskey and your songs for several months now, always at the seat closest to the door, out of sight and out of mind. His favorite of your casual dive bar digs were the trousers you occasionally wore. You looked so sharp.

When your set was done, you tried to be gracious as you left the piano’s side. Alastor watched you from his seat, letting your face light up once again when you recognized him. He gave a noticeable look to your shoes.

“Those will do.”

“Do what?”

“You,” he leaned against the bar, “owe me a drink. And alcohol always pairs well with dance.”

Maybe a date, you thought. You offered him your arm, “Lead the way.”

As you walked, arm in arm, you found yourself not needing to speak much. His arm was so solid in yours. You felt like everyone was looking, the handsome man and the pretty young thing. Did you two look sweet? Like the cleanest cut kids in the neighborhood? Did you look like the kind of people who sat in pews once a week and clasped hands over dinner?

Did you look like the sort to toss bodies in cars? No, decidedly not. And it made you feel powerful. What a perfect act. The feeling of looking nothing like what you were was akin to the addicting rush of your cat and mouse game with most men.

“Do you like those group dances? Like the Big Apple?” Alastor asked as he opened the doors for you.

“Not particularly…”

“Perfect, neither do I.” He laughed.

A small table in a small nook of a booth lining the small dance floor. You clinked your glasses together, no toast necessary, and watched the couples swing around the room. As the 20’s were fading from the rear view, you all hoped dance would be less stigmatized. But part of the fun was how scandalous it was.

“How was your day? Made it home safe and sound?” Alastor crossed his legs and leaned into the plush booth seat.

Oh, this was going to be… normal? You choked a little on your drink, surprised. “Honestly?”

“Always.”

“I sat in my apartment changing my shoes repeatedly.”

Alastor’s laugh was loud and sharp, but you didn’t find it obnoxious. You liked it.

“That wasn’t my intention. I just didn’t want to risk you being unable to dance.”

You rolled your eyes, taking a slow sip with your gaze on the dancers, “Ya know how to avoid that? Tell me to wear shoes for dancing.”

A snicker, “Perhaps I’m not quite as skilled with talking to women as I like to think.”

“Then talk to me like a man.” Your glass made a thud as it hit the table. Alastor’s eyes widened as they always did when you said something wildly amusing to him.

“Hmm, I don’t talk much to men.” He thought, “Not for long conversations, that is.” Your mind conjured up the two dead men. “I never asked your name. Is it too late now?”

“You saw it on the posters. Autumn.”

Alastor smirked, “Autumn Hind is not your real name. That is clearly a stage name.”

Swirling your drink in its crystal, you smiled, “It’s a good one though, you have to admit.” His brow cocked, not understanding. “Hind, a doe. And what do does do in the fall?” Your own brows rose suggestively.

Alastor hit the table, “A deer pun?! Oh darling, we’re going to be fast friends.” He offered you his glass for another wordless toast.

“I thought it was pretty funny, for a burlesque dancer no less. A horny little deer prancing on stage. Better than Allie Way and Frosti Winters.” You grinned into the glass, proud of yourself.

You could see Alastor physically relax beside you, dancers moving about in front of you both.

“And yours? Your day, that is.”

He hummed, “I slept late, stayed up late. Took care of our newly penniless friend.”

You wanted to ask more, what did you do with him? Can I come next time? Is there a pool of gators somewhere eating well today?

He leaned in to you, “May I have this dance?”

Your smile was uncontained, all desire to control your outward appearance was lost in the fun of dancing with your newest partner. Was there anyone else in the room with you anymore? Who knows. The music kept playing and that was all you needed.

Alastor was a marvelous dancer, you noticed other women glancing his way, eye lashes fluttering but ignored as he focused on the movements. This was how you managed to not-stalk him so well, he was completely unaware of the interested gazes of those around him.

While he didn’t notice the individual stares, Alastor could feel the attention on him and it made his chest puff. He loved it, how he could feed an image to the masses and be seen as he saw fit. It was something you both had in common, even if neither of you had strong enough egos to vocalize it yet.

When the music wound down, a slow number for the lovers, you hadn’t expected Alastor to stay on the dance floor. A slow dance, one arm on your hip, hand in hand.

Now close, you felt you could speak without risk of others eavesdropping.

“Why did you invite me out? I have a distinct memory of you saying you had very little affection or time.” You were shorter than him, your shoes not very tall, so you had to speak up and at his neck.

“A man who says he has no time is a man unwilling to make any.” Alastor led you in a small sway along the floor.

“Oh so you just didn’t see me worth the effort before.” You said it half teasingly, half seriously.

He looked down now, eyes meeting yours again, “That was before I knew how entertaining you could be.”

You pouted, entertaining was not the word you wanted to hear. Enthralling, Enchanting, Endearing.

“There’s that face again. What ever could it mean.” Alastor’s head cocked to the side.

“I’m entertaining at work. You don’t need to take me out to enjoy my entertainment value.”

He laughed again, making you glare, “Darling, being entertaining is high praise. And you’re not entertaining at work. You’re bewitching.” He pulled you a little closer, “The way you make those men act a fool. Truly a sight. You wield a power many women just dabble in.”

You shimmied a little against his chest, “Well if we’re giving out compliments…” you remembered the satisfying hum from last night, “The canvas was clever, but the water in the cans was brilliant. Nothing suspicious about a little petrol in the trunk.”

His grin widened. “And your precision. One cut and that brute was down. It was remarkable.” The hand holding your waist began to tighten. It egged you on, whether he intended it to or not, “I can appreciate the way you carry yourself.” Your freehand ran across his vest, suit jacket left at the table, “I wish I could see more.”

Your chest pressed against his, trapping your hand. “Ooh, you are observant, little one. Why did you agree to come out? Still chasing my,” his hips pressed against yours, hand sliding down slightly to hold you close, “affection?”

Fingers playing with his buttons, “Hmm, debilitating fascination and your affection. Do you have any to spare?” You smiled sweetly up at him.

Your mouths were on each other before the bathroom door closed behind you. Alastor locking it without looking, one hand staying on your neck. The small room was just a single toilet and a bathroom cabinet with a built in sink. Little tulip shaped light sconces above the mirror made the room brighter than the dance hall. Your nails lightly grazed his scalp, him humming in return. His body was pressing yours against the wall, despite his thin frame he had a power to him. Hands on your hips, holding you firmly in place. Your hips tried to roll against his anyway.

“Is it praise? I’ll sing your song until I’m blue in the face, until my lungs give out just tell me what you need.” You whined.

His head shook softly, thumb pulling down on your chin to open your mouth. “It isn’t that simple. It’s not something you can say.”

His tongue swiped over your own, neither in your mouths. He tasted like whiskey, bitter and fragrant. Your eyes fluttered shut, feeling his body against yours. You were vibrating; the way you always did when he was near you.

Kissing, tongues, body presses. You were tangled together.

“This isn't… doing anything?” You asked, his lips coming to your neck. Sighing, your hand gripped his hair weakly. “That feels good.”

He shook his head into your skin, “I don’t see any desire to carry it further. But I enjoy it for what it is. And you seem to enjoy it. Is that enough for you?”

You wanted to scream, to argue, but as he pulled away and you stared up into his sharp honey brown eyes, you felt helpless to deny him anything. Did you need sex? Really? It’d been three months now without it and you were only recently clawing at the sheets with thoughts of Alastor. Being in his mouth was better than being strangers. Sliding fingers back into his hair and drawing him closer, your leg came up and hooked on his hip.

Alastor pulled you both from the wall and turned you, pressing your body into the sink. You were staring at your reflection, Alastor’s eyes meeting yours in the mirror, “I’m happy to do many things for you… just not exactly what you’re asking for; not right now. Not in this tiny dance hall bathroom.”

His hand snaked up your chest and lightly held your neck, you fought back a moan.

“Well, if it’s good enough for your wife….”

He laughed into your skin, other hand slipping down the front of your dress and cupping your crotch. “I’ve heard no complaints.” The way he anchored you, arms twisted and firm around such vital parts of you, made your whole body relax into his arms. A parachute safely secured around you as you fell. Mouth to your ear, hot and warm breath, “Turn around.”

Head spinning, you turned in his arms. Alastor lifted you up and onto the countertop of the sink, lips crashing back into yours.

The sound of music shook the thin walls of the room, heart erratic in your chest. His fingers slid up both thighs slowly, a familiar feeling for you now. His hands your favorite dance partner.

His eyes didn’t leave yours as he dropped to his knees, your legs closing in embarrassment before he slid his hands between them.

“Did you ask for more affection, dear?” He pushed your dress up around your waist, two fingers pulling the fabric of your panties to the side. You wanted to rip them off, damning your garters. You felt feverish as you watched him bury his face into your pussy. Your wetness was evident by how easily he glided through your folds. One hand gripped the counter, the other combing through his chestnut hair. Alastor kept his eyes on you, reading your face as he moved his tongue over your heat.

Mind racing for something clever to say, you opened your mouth but just gasped out his name as he sucked gently at your clit. One of your short heeled shoes you stressed over fell off as your knees came up around his head.

You were confident you made the right answer. With the music thumping along you didn’t feel any need to keep yourself quiet.

Your breathy moans and little hip rolls into his mouth made Alastor smile against your skin. He had learned many ways to keep people satiated.

With a struggle, you opened your legs again allowing his tongue to drop down and into you. Nose rutting against your sensitive clit with every movement of his tongue in and out.

A pounding on the door made you jump.

“People are waiting!” Someone yelled.

Alastor pushed his tongue deeper, wriggling up and down against your twitching walls. Your head fell forward, “Alastor-,” you choked.

He buried his nose into your muff, eyes closing.

The door knob rattled, “Hello!”

“Alastor.”

So warm. Your body was so warm on his face. Your smell was making him feel feral. Gluttony. The way you were twitching and heaving under his tongue, groaning his name. Had he ever felt so powerful while on his knees? Had he ever enjoyed someone else’s body in such a bloodless way? No. Decidedly not.

“We’re gonna get the key!” The man at the door said.

“Okay, okay, affection received.” You patted his head, pushing him away by his forehead. “Don’t need to end the night in a paddy wagon.”

Alastor’s tongue was still out, eyes glossy as he looked up at you.

For the briefest second you considered wrapping your thighs back around his head and waiting for the key.

You hopped off, grabbing your shoe and leaning to get it back on. Crouching down you kissed Alastor’s nose and wiped his chin clean with your handkerchief before pushing it into his shirt pocket. “Up, up!” Hand in hand you barreled out of the door before the staff could see you and rushed to the furthest corner of the hall.

When you stopped and looked back you saw a staff member looking around annoyed, a man putting his hands up and entering the bathroom with a huff.

Before you could say anything, compliment or scolding, a woman was in front of Alastor. Your hand slid from his naturally.

“I am so sorry. Are you the host of that jazz show?” The woman had her hands in front of her, nervously twisting the handle of her purse, “Sorry if you’re not! You just look like the description, tall… handsome… cute glasses.”

You turned around, partly acting like you didn’t know him at all and partly hiding the way your face twisted. Unsure what exactly you two were doing, you didn’t want to create hassle for either of you. Alastor laughed, “The very same! Alastor, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” With your back turned you couldn’t see the woman’s face, but she made a barely audible squeak.

While you were eavesdropping, a man offered you his arm. Your hand slipped to Alastor’s back, giving him a touch as you slid into the strangers arms for a dance.

He turned around to see you hit the floor and smiled, returning to the fan before him. After a few more compliments about his voice and his appearance, the woman shrunk a little, “Are you free tonight? I don’t have an escort home…”

A hum, soft smile, “Ah, I would love to see a fan safely home. But, alas, I am here with someone.”

What an easy excuse. It was nice to not need to lie.

“I see…. Oh, uh, your glasses… here, they’re a little smudged,” she offered him her handkerchief but he declined, pulling yours from his pocket.

“Danced too hard?” She chuckled, trying to elongate the conversation.

Alastor hummed, fogging the glasses before wiping them clear. “Eating, actually.”

“Oh you’re a messy eater, huh?”

“So I’ve been told.” He folded the square into a triangle and returned it to his pocket.

“What a… delicate handkerchief.” She looked at the soft yellow fabric and saw your yellow dress twirling behind him. “Ah. Well….It was a pleasure to meet you.” The woman sheepishly excused herself, letting him watch you dance around the floor with the stranger.

He’d never so explicitly told anyone his proclivities as he had done with you. Growing up he learned quickly his interests misaligned with other young men, but he didn’t really understand it well enough until he entered his early 20s and had to learn skills his peers didn’t. A man can only turn down so many offers for sex before people begin to question him. Certain rumors could be downright dangerous.

Your eyes kept returning to him, your smile meeting you eyes as you twirled.

While he had bed a number of partners, it was more often than not the result of physical reactions and what felt like necessity. The few times he genuinely felt he could enjoy in indulging in carnal pleasures he found himself utterly alone. He enjoyed dating, necking, kissing, but he could only keep some people so happy for so long. Quite a few women assumed marriage would solve the issue, and pushed him. Which made the inevitable break up easier.

His reputation was that of a rake now. The popular host who rarely dates but often canoodles.

He laughed to himself, if rumors spread of his recent antics with you he’d be practically blacklisted from certain clubs. Alastor watched you graciously leave your dance partner and hop up to him. If he were any other man, you’d throw your arms around him and make him swoon for you. But he was Alastor. Your confusingly respectful killer. So you stopped yourself, instead offering him a smile.

“I wasn’t aware you were a radio host.”

“You never did ask my job.” You both walked back to the table where his jacket was lying in the booth seat.

“Honestly did not care. Which is unusual for me. Normally my first question to men is what they do for work.” You tried to avoid looking at the bathroom before settling back into your seat beside him.

He lifted his hand and gestured for another round, “Should I be flattered or insulted?”

“Oh definitely flattered. There were much more interesting aspects to you.” There was a little space between you, a foot or so of emptiness.

You scooted closer, Alastor glancing to you before shifting his legs and closing the last few inches of distance. Thigh touching thigh, you sat silently while your drinks were poured and brought to your table.

“To sinning,” you offered a real toast, Alastor laughing his signature laugh and raising his glass.

“To sinning!”

His hand came to rest on yours, both settled on your lap under the table. Your cheeks were hurting, desperately trying to keep your smile looking demure and not stupid-school-girl-in-love. His fingers folded into yours, and you entirely lost the plot, face melting into a lovesick grin.

Alastor leaned into you, “Are you alright? Liquor already gone to your head?”

You squeezed his hand, “Different kind of intoxication, doll.”

The evening was, in a word, divine. You danced with reckless abandon and enjoyed various degrees of affection. You were surprised to see Alastor so open, you had pegged him as less wanting to draw attention to himself. But no, he clearly relished in making heads turn.

He offered you a ride, and this time you took it. You didn’t live far, you just wanted a little more time. When he stopped the car, you jokingly turned around and looked into the trunk.

“We’re very alone.” You mused. He hummed an agreement, getting out of the car and opening your door. “Wow and a gentleman.”

“A testament to my mother. If you’re comfortable, give me a wave from the window when you get in.” He closed your door behind you.

“I don’t mind if you know where I live, you’ll have easier opportunities to kill me, I’m sure of it.” Placing two hands on his chest, you leaned up, “Is a good night kiss too forward?”

Alastor stifled a laugh, “Quite! My image of you is shattered.” before leaning down to meet your lips.

When in the apartment you turned on a light and went straight to the window. Leaning against his car with both hands in his pockets, Alastor was smiling up at you. With a wave from you, he got back into his car and left.

To say you were on cloud nine would be an understatement. Clouds couldn’t carry the weight of your joy. You’d fall to the ground like lead, regardless of the cloud classification. And with that feeling you went to bed smiling, unaware of the dark catalyst barreling towards you.

༻Masterlist༺

∰ Summoning the Horny Little Deer Cult (general tag list):

@cxrsedwxrlds , @nonetheartist , @tsunaki , @janchei , @wettiny-in-smutland , @moonmark98 , @hoebihoeshi , @pansexual-opera-house , @polytheatrix , @lorddiabigmommymilkers , @backinthefkingbuildingagain , @harley2223-blog , @coffee-colored-hopeless-romantic , @poinappel , @midnightnoiserose , @spookieroz , @missmidorima , @ivebeenthearchersstuff , @downbadforfictionalppl , @xx-all-purpose-nerd-xx , @sleepylittledemon , @aether-th3-enby , @dontfuckbutimfab , @breathlessaura , @aperfectidiot , @certainlygay , @jth12 , @star-kujo-platinum ,

@ivebeenthearchersstuffn, @rubyninja1 , @simphornies , @alleystore , @readergirlstuff , @berry-demon , @chirimeimei , @fairyv-ice , @olive-frog , @thonethatflies620 , @tiredkiwiii , @ilikemyteawithmilk , @whateverlololo , @psipies , @howabouticallyou , @roxxie-wolf , @ive-no-idea-what-to-call-this , @fizzled-phoenix , @fjorjestertealeaf , @phobophobular , @surusurusuru , @mariaclarade-la-cruz1 , @whateverlololo , @simplyonehellofanotaku , @xixflower , @i-am-nonbinary-bean-deal-with-it , @roxxie-wolf , @a-case-of-attachment , @multifandomfanatic02 , @watereddownmilk , @raynerrold , @crazii-saber-wolf , @valkyrie-expeditions , @bontensbabygirl , @sillyb0nez , @oo0lady-mad0oo , @jazzmasternot , @pseudobun , @fraugwinska✨, @alitaar , @straows , @alastorssimp , @angelicwillows

ADIF @multifandomfanatic02 ,

🏹Alastor stalkers: @celestial-vomit , @amurtan ,@valkyrie-expeditions

#alastor x reader #hazbin hotel #human alastor #alastor smut #hazbin hotel smut #hazbin alastor #alastor #hazbin hotel fanfiction #hazbin hotel x reader #fanfiction #alastor x reader smut #alastor x you #hazbin hotel alastor #hazbin

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otterlyfoolish · 6 months ago

Text

No Smoking Indoors

(Shiba Togo x GN!Reader)

Warnings: Mentions of war, Possibly OOC, not edited

Tags: Small Age Gap, unrequited crush, its like really subtle though

Word Count: 3k

Summary:

Cafe Haru Haru has all sorts of people. Typically, you'd usually find people that's skilled in combat visiting the most for work. So it really shouldn't surprise Shiba to see a fellow war veteran there.

If you like Ao3 for reading fics more, here!

-----

Café Haru Haru is a café. Obvious, right?

You can buy coffee, you can get tea, you can get some sweet treats if the owner remembered to restock it for that day, otherwise you can settle for some sort of fruit juice she has in a little fridge under the counter. (Which is most of the time, since she tends to snack on her own products.)

From the decoration, you might think that its kind of like a bar, but there's no alcohol being served there - the wine glasses on the shelves are mostly for decoration. You can tell by the dust on the shelves - it might have been used to serve drinks once, but now it sits there solely to reflect the warm lighting and any sunlight it catches. It's probably for the best considering the main purpose of the business though.

It's not just a café, because if it was, it would be out of business extraordinarily fast. The main function is that it connects sorcerers to paying clients, and collects a fee. Typically it's yakuza looking for a little more firepower (sometimes literally,) or some blood thirsty fool that doesn't know any other way of life.

With a ring of the bell from the front of the store, it lets the owner know that someone's come in, whether it's a client looking for some protection, or a violent guard dog, she welcomes them in with a idle smile, hoping that its something more exciting this time.

"Excuse us!" The man yells out, already treating the place like a second home as he saunters in, the younger man next to him following closely as he gives him a blank stare.

"Ah, Shiba." She dejects with something of a scowl, leaning on the counter with a slump in her shoulders. "I'm busy right now, sit down and I'll get to you." She waves at him dismissively then shoots Chihiro a warmer greeting: "Hey, you look cool today as well, Chihiro!" To which she get a slow nod of confusion in response. Shiba glances between the two of them, the preferential treatment clear as day.

The two of them sit down at the stools, staying quiet as they glance over to Hinao explaining the details of a job to another customer - this was uncommon, they've never really been around seeing her handle her customers.

The customer has been served a cup of coffee (something Shiba and Chihiro had to always make themselves), and sat silently at the counter, reading over information Hinao had handed them. With a small thank you from them, Hinao nodded and then walked away, greeting Shiba now.

"So! What do you need?" She asks, leaving her customer to their own devices as she slides over to her regulars, hands flat on the table. "Need another job, Shiba? I got a couple, you might like." She says, "or just checking up on intel?"

"Just dropping by Tokyo." He answers simply, "but while I'm here, thought I'd also just ask you, how's it going on that front?"

"Bad." She sighs, looking out the window with a shoulders slumped. "I got nothing. Nada."

"Ah." He mouths back, while Chihiro lowers his gaze towards the counter, his face remaining as stoic as ever. Shiba had a feeling that the teen was pretty disappointed at the news though. "Well, let me see the job listings then. I'll check it out if it sounds promising."

"Sure, just wait 'till they're done." Hinao nods back at him, putting her hands into her coat pocket, using her head to motion towards the only other person in the room. "They've got the nice juicy ones right now. 'course, I've other ones if you're looking for something easier for a old man like you."

Shiba ignores that last jab. "Huh, really?" He utters back in response with a eyebrow raised - usually Hinao tried to pair up the difficulty to the person so her customers wouldn't be disappointed. If they've got the 'juicy' ones, that meant that they've got the high-risk, high-reward offers.

She nods back at Shiba, about to say something more before her other customer placed the papers down on the counter, waiting patiently for Hinao to speak to them again with their hands folded on the counter. Shiba glanced over again towards them as Hinao walked back over, discussing the details with the sorcerer.

"I'd like to take this one, please." They say holding one in particular. Their voice made Shiba's ears perk up.

"Okay, I'll give them a call, and we can arrange a meeting sometime." Hinao says, marking it down in a little notepad under the counter before grabbing the pile of job offers, sliding it over to Shiba. He didn't catch it, seemingly frozen as he looked across the room, leaving Chihiro to stop the pile of paper before it hit the floor.

"Thank you." They nodded back in response to Hinao who walked over to the rotary phone, humming absentmindedly as she rung the customer, one hand in her coat pocket.

"Mr Shiba," Chihiro starts out, trying to get his attention as Shiba still seemed to be frozen in his seat.

"Huh? Yeah, what's up, Chihiro?" He snapped out of it, glancing back at him as Chihiro fixed the pile of paper.

"The job listings you asked for." Chihiro answered simply, putting them in front of Shiba in a neat pile.

"Ah, thanks." He nodded, then turned his face back to the other side, looking at the only other customer again. Chihiro joined in, blinking at the two of them with a blank expression, but it was obvious he was wondering why Shiba seemed so interested in this other person. Slowly, he moved his hand to rest on the hilt of Enten, his eyes narrowing in anticipation, glancing over to Hinao, and made some mental calculations in his mind.

There didn't seem to be anything unusual about them - they seemed to be a pretty normal person overall, so Chihiro isn't sure what Shiba is picking up on. He's just trying to follow Shiba's lead. Then, there was finally movement.

The person from across the room pulled out a pack of cigarettes, pulling one out as they waited for Hinao to finish the deal for them. At the sight of them taking out the little box, she narrowed her them and shooed them out of her store, motioning towards the 'NO SMOKING' sign.

They nodded, then slowly made their way out. They seemed to have expected to be ushered out of the room. Choosing to wait outside as Hinao stayed on the phone, still discussing the details with her client.

Shiba's eyes followed them as they walked past him and Chihiro, still not even bothering to give either of them a single glance as they pulled the door open and walked out, standing outside for their smoke.

Chihiro blinked in confusion, then moved his hands back to his sides.

Shiba was quick to move after this. "Chihiro, you stay here and look through the pile, I'm going to have a smoke." He says, getting up from the stool, readjusting his shirt to look messier as he walked out.

"Mr Shiba, you ran out of cigarettes." Chihiro answers back, watching him walk out the door without another word from him. Chihiro blinked at the sight of him walking up to the stranger before turning to the pile of paper on the counter and reading through it carefully like he was told to.

-----

"There's a first for everything, huh?" A masculine voice calls out to you as you light your cigarette. You already knew who it was, so you didn't bother looking up as you took a deep breath as you let him continue speaking. "Never seen you in trouble before."

He looked at you as you slid the lighter back into your pockets, your eyes lazily turning to him as you began smoking, leaning against the cold walls of Cafe Haru Haru. You've aged, he could tell, but at the same time you looked younger - it's probably because of the fact the dark eye bags he's used to seeing on your skin wasn't so prominent anymore, unlike the past. You don't look so tired - maybe you've finally been getting some peace at night.

"Mr Shiba," you rolled his name off your tongue as you finally lifted your head up, blowing out a cloud of smoke as you spoke. You don't sound too different. "You still follow strangers into dark alleyways. Break that nasty habit, why don't you?"

He scoffed slightly at your answer, "we're not strangers, don't address me so formally."

"Apologies," you nodded back at him as you stood a little to the side, letting him stand next to you in the narrow space. He took you up on your unspoken offer, standing opposite you, back against the other wall of another building. "Oi. You brat," you verbally slap him as you let him settle near you.

"You're not old enough to start calling me a brat either!" He retorted back, but you could tell that he doesn't really care about the way you address him. He's playing around. "We're not in war times anymore either, so you're not my superior."

Shiba doesn't get angry easily, the both of you know that there's worse things to get riled up over compared to this. You somewhat miss the days where he would show you something that's a little more of a normal reaction.

"I wasn't done speaking," you say, pulling the cigarette out your mouth to speak again. He stayed quiet after that, listening to you. "You were worrying the young man by staring at me like that," you murmured out, gazing up at him with furrowed eyebrows. Your eyes seemed to catch something, as you briefly looked down. "Oh for goodness...! Fix your clothes." You grumbled, putting your cigarette back into your mouth to free up your hands. They smoothed out his collared shirt, and you pulled his suspenders back into place. "Why don't you notice these things, Shiba?"

Damn you and the eyes on the back of your head. But your observant nature was also what he was betting on. "Sorry."

He had noticed, but he knew that nothing would happen, so he didn't bother giving Chihiro any form of commutation regarding you. Though, he should have really at least gave him a wave or something. "I was just making sure that it really was you."

"Hm." You flicked your eyes up at him, not really buying his answer but chose not to linger long on it. "He looks like a young Rokuhira. But with less peach fuzz."

"...Yeah." Shiba nodded at your words, his shoulders slumping slightly at your words. His tone changed as he spoke, you noticed but couldn't place what he was feeling in response to your statement. "He's grown up a lot."

Your eyes flick over to the street and then back over to him. "Nice swords he's got." You state, taking another deep breath of your cigarette. Nonchalantly as ever, Shiba thinks, as you don't bother seeing if you're crossing boundaries you shouldn't be. "I take it that one of them is..." You say, not finishing on purpose, and Shiba is forced to mentally retrack his last statement.

"Yep." He nodded firmly at your unfinished question. If this was anyone else, he might have to reconsider sharing this bit of information, but he knew that you wouldn't do anything with it - it would just betray everything he knew about you.

You blinked at him slowly, already understanding any implications about that statement. "...I see."

A small moment of silence fell between the two of you - he rested his back against the cold walls of the building behind him as he gave you more space to stand with him. You stared at him, watching him watch you, the two of you aware of how close you were but didn't want to move further apart either.

"I saw the little poster about the Hishaku Ms Hinao put up." You stated, looking at him in the eyes, already knowing that he was the one that requested for the information. You've never asked Hinao about who put it up, but judging by what you know right now and the time frame that poster went up on the corkboard, you took a small leap of faith. He stared back into yours, occasionally glancing down to the cigarette in between your lips. "I'll let you know if I hear anything about them."

"...Thanks. That would help." He says, now looking off to the side before slowly guiding his eyes back to you, tracing your features as he tries to read your expression. He wouldn't be surprised if you were disappointed in him - he had a feeling that Kunishige would be.

You stare back at him, not caring about the way his eyes never really left your face. "Be careful," You say to him, locking back onto his pupils as you breath out another small puff of smoke. He stays silent, no random interjections. "I know you probably don't want to, but guiding or helping teenagers to commit violence doesn't settle nicely on your soul." As you spoke, your voice grew quieter. "Don't put more on your conscience if you can help it. The both of you."

...Huh. Shiba thought for sure you'd scold him for letting Chihiro do this. There was a part of him that followed you out of Cafe Haru Haru because he needed to consult to someone with a stronger moral compass. Kunishige wasn't there anymore, Azami could only assist him so much as part of the Kamunabi, you were the only one left.

"...Speaking from experience?" He asks you, though he really doesn't need to. He was there, from the start to the very end.

"I mean, that's all I have." You say back with a light voice that's meant to clear the tension, but he doesn't latch onto it. You take another inhale, shifting your eyes away, unable to bring yourself to look at what expression he had. "Sorry. I shouldn't lecture you."

"It's fine." Shiba says, but doesn't touch on it again as he shifts to another topic as you seem like you want to leave the conversation already. "How you've been doing recently?" He asks and the simple question already makes you want to let out a small groan.

"Eh." You start off, trying to think of a way to summarise your current everyday life in a way that won't concern him, but is enough to be honest at the same time. "Good enough. I'm currently teaching sorcery though."

"Huh?" He lets his mouth hang open at your words, blinking at you repeatedly. "Like, to a class? Or are you back in the Kamunabi?"

"Don't be ridiculous." You scoffed out at his guessing. "Just this kid that ran away from home." With a chuckle, you go on. "He's got potential, but he has a tendency to stick his nose into things he shouldn't be. He's like you when you were younger."

"I didn't cause that much trouble." He says, straight up denying your words.

"Only because you got away with it." You say, "The three of you would scuttle away to pull some shit off, and I would be forced to clean up any mess you made because I was in charge of your damn group." You let out a verbal exhale, thinking back on it. "If it wasn't for the fact it was war times, I wouldn't even be put in charge of you guys, y'know...? I'm not that much older than you."

He opens his mouth to say something in response to you, but when he receives a sharp glare in response, he closes it again, noticing something in the background. You turned around, looking at whatever he was looking at.

At the sound of a bell ringing behind you, you faced Hinao who had just exited from her store, holding a little bit of paper. The two of you instantly stop talking in anticipation of her speaking to either of you.

"Yo, you still- ah, there you are!" She said, walking up to you and extending the object in her hand to you, not caring that the two of you were just standing in the alleyway. "Here, they wanna meet up with you before working, but it seems like they're willing to hire you."

"Thank you, Ms Hinao." You said, taking it from her - you could tell from the lines that it was just torn out of her notepad. As you folded it neatly, you continued speaking, "I'll give you a cut of the pay if I get it, is that okay?"

"Eh?" She glanced over to Shiba who had forced a completely blank look on his face, not daring to show anything on his face to Hinao. He tried to look serious, but she thought that he just looked like a frog. "...Yeah, I mean, you always remember to pay up so I'm not too bothered." She agreed rather easily, before walking back into the café, realising that Shiba was talking to you, and there was just some sort of weird vibe coming from him. "See you."

The two of you watch Hinao go back into the café, a pensive thought on your face while Shiba continued to try to stay stoic. It doesn't really suit him, in your opinion.

"...Hm." You mumbled, sensing that she didn't want to hang around outside for too long for whatever reason, but once again, you don't care enough and just slip the paper into your pocket. "Well, I guess I should be going now."

His eyes darted over to you, "already?"

"Yeah?" You said, raising an eyebrow back at him. "I mean, I don't have a reason to stick around."

"You could talk to me." He said, "let's smoke together a little longer."

"Quit slacking," you shot down with a light laugh, rolling your eyes at him. "You haven't even been smoking while talking to me anyways."

He let out a small huff of annoyance, but you knew that he wasn't actually offended. "...Here, let's stay in contact." He says, pulling out his flip phone and handing it over to you.

"...Yeah, sure." You agree, putting your cigarette back in your mouth as you typed with both hands. When you handed his phone back over to you, he stuck his hand out, looking at you expectantly. You stared down at his palm, trying to think of what on Earth he wanted before taking the cigarette out of your mouth and putting it in between his fingers without another word.

He gave you a incredulous look, his pupils going back and forth from the object in his hands to your dumbfounded expression. "What?"

"...Huh?" You uttered back at him.

"I'm asking for your phone," he states, giving each word time to sink in, "so I can, you know, put my number in your contacts."

"...But I'm not going to contact you." You state, crossing your arms. He narrows his eyes at you, about to say more, but you chuckle at the expression on his face. "Goodbye, Shiba. Please give the young Rokuhira my sincerest condolences." you say back to him as you begin to walk away, joining the crowd. He watched your figure slowly disappear into the flock of people.

Shiba looked down at the object in his hands, it was still burning at the cherry. His eye flicked upwards again.

He pressed the cigarette to his lips, taking one last inhale of it as he looked at the crowd of people, trying to find you once more, before snuffing it out, walking back into Cafe Haru Haru.

#kagurabachi #Shiba togo #shiba togo x reader #x reader #why is it only today i find out Shiba's full name?? am I just slow??#otterlyfoolishwritings

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kunsthalextracity · 4 years ago

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The History of Queer Nightlife in Antwerp: Self-Interview in a Convex Mirror

In the framework of the group exhibition ‘Daily Nightshift’, Kunsthal Extra City collaborated with the Urban Studies Institute of the University of Antwerp on a lecture series. Due to COVID-19 we unfortunately couldn’t allow these lectures to take place at our premises.

To replace his lecture, professor Bart Eeckhout wrote an interview with himself.

In his text Eeckhout, board member of the Urban Studies Institute at the University of Antwerp, researches the history of queer nightlife in Antwerp and the spatial shifts that have occurred along the way. Where in the city were sexual minorities able to make contact? In what kind of places of entertainment? How did these change in shape and location? Which material traces of this nightlife remain?

Text & images: Bart Eeckhout

The History of Queer Nightlife in Antwerp: Self-Interview in a Convex Mirror

Q. So, professor, before Covid-19 changed everyone’s plans, you were going to give a lecture about the history of queer nightlife in Antwerp as part of the public program for the exhibition?

A. Well, not quite a lecture.

Q. But you were going to entertain our audience with lots of slides and flashy pictures?

A. Not really. As a matter of fact, I was wondering how to turn the presentation into something more than the delivery of an academic text, something that could satisfy an audience that is drowning in audiovisual information. The thing is that I saw myself forced to talk about a topic that is hard to illustrate, and to do so moreover as an amateur historian.

Q. How do you mean?

A. I actually teach English and American literature. But I happen to be the only board member of the Urban Studies Institute at the University of Antwerp who is simultaneously on the board of A*, the network of colleagues who specialize in gender and sexuality studies. There I have a reputation for being into queer studies and for stimulating the collaboration between queer academics and activists, since I consider myself to be both.

Q. And so the organizers came knocking on your door to ask if you could speak to the topic of queer nightlife in Antwerp?

A. Yes. And I accepted to do so because I have coincidentally been acquiring some expertise on the topic. Last year a colleague with whom I love to collaborate at the university, the media scholar Alexander Dhoest, got an invitation to contribute a chapter on Antwerp for an international book on gay neighborhoods in cities around the world – what used to be called “gay ghettoes.” We remembered that a PhD student of ours, the musicologist Rob Herreman, had spent a lot of time in archives to find out more about the recent history of LGBTQs in Antwerp in relation to music. Though we were hesitant to venture into terrain that should ideally be explored by skilled historians, we’re not aware of any Flemish colleagues doing academic research into recent LGBTQ history, certainly not with a specific focus on Antwerp. In addition, the book for which we were invited was being put together by architects and would thus probably cut us some slack. So we realized that the case of Antwerp would get attention in the collection only if we were willing to undertake the job ourselves.

Accepting to write the chapter has meant that we were forced to immerse ourselves quickly in the materials and sources we had at our disposal so as to develop a critical narrative that would meet the minimum requirements of academic scholarship. We were primarily interested in all the things we might learn from the exercise.

Q. And did you learn a few things?

A. I certainly hope so! One thing we hypothesized from the start is that the Anglo-American way of understanding gay neighborhoods would be only partially applicable to Antwerp, at best. And that is also what we argued at the more theoretical level. If you want to look for queer forms of geographic clustering in a Flemish city such as Antwerp, you should omit a lot of the social functions you find historically in the gay neighborhoods of New York or San Francisco. The “reverse diaspora” of sexual minorities from the countryside to the city that underpinned these metropolitan neighborhoods in the US never took place to the same extent, or in the same manner, in Flanders or Belgium.

In addition, a historic city such as Antwerp is relatively small by international standards. Getting around, even on foot or by bicycle, is easy, so that there’s no urgent need to choose particular residential areas if you happen to be queer. For these and several other reasons, the first thing to note about gay neighborhoods in Antwerp is that there was never anything more than some spatially clustered nightlife.

Q. Let’s talk for a moment about that nightlife then. How easy was it to go back in time to undertake your investigation?

A. That was one of the difficulties. It’s not as if you can simply fall back on standard published histories of queer life in Belgium or Flanders, let alone histories that deal specifically with Antwerp. The larger context isn’t so hard to sketch, but the specifics are a bit of a problem. When you research the history of public sex in Antwerp – by which in this case I mean the institutional environment for nondomestic sexual interactions among citizens – it isn’t hard to figure out how the first red-light district emerged during the city’s historic heyday in the fifteenth and sixteenth centuries. As this red-light district catered primarily to sailors, it was understandably located close to the river, in the narrow streets just north of the City Hall that came to be known as the Schipperskwartier or Skippers Quarter.

This much is standard knowledge. But how did same-sex interactions ever figure into that lusting, lawless, lowlife milieu? What might possibly be the historic sources in which you might find reliable evidence for same-sex intercourse taking place in this environment? There isn’t much you can go by. You must hope that somewhere a slight flicker will flare up to evoke a fleeting image of what might have been going on. Let me illustrate this by showing the invisibility of our topic at its most palpable. Here’s the picture of a street in the former Skippers Quarter. Do you recognize it?

Q. Not immediately.

A. Don’t blame yourself. Though I personally love to roam through all the little streets of Antwerp’s historic center, I must confess I had never bothered to walk through this one before my research took me there. It’s called the Gorter Street and it’s a very short, narrow, one-way street that is about as bland and uninteresting as you can imagine. Do you see the red-brick house in the middle of the image? That wasn’t always there, of course. If we can trust the history of house numbers, it stands where previously the Crystal Palace was to be found, a gay bar whose building collapsed, literally, sometime in the 1960s. But before the Crystal Palace was a gay bar, it was a luxury brothel, as far back as the turn of the twentieth century and even earlier. And that’s where we were able to locate our first piece of not entirely reliable evidence for same-sex goings-on – not entirely reliable because it requires a detour via the fictive world of novels and a willingness to fill in the blanks. What do you remember about the Flemish writer Georges Eekhoud?

Q. Not much.

A. He was our own Oscar Wilde, if you like – the first famous gay writer in Flanders who, like Wilde, had to defend himself in court. Unfortunately, he wrote in French, which means we’ve forgotten him even more efficiently than if he’d written in Dutch. Anyway, he published a novel in 1888, La nouvelle Carthage, in which he appears to evoke this particular brothel in great detail as a cave full of mirrors in which “all stages of debauchery” took place. Given his own sexual orientation, it’s very easy to imagine that these must have included same-sex interactions, but in his description Eekhoud preferred to remain coy about the sexual acts, so that it’s really for our own 21st-century imaginations to flesh out the specifics.

Q. So for what period did you find the first evidence of same-sex activities in the Skippers Quarter that didn’t take the form of literary fiction but of nonfictional testimony?

A. We had to jump to the first half of the twentieth century for that. Mainly, what we then find is people testifying to drag performances taking place in the Skippers Quarter. Our favorite example is that of Danny’s Bar, a notorious bar for sailors where both the owner and his male staff were dressed as women and the sailors were being tempted into maximum binging.

On an online forum for retired sailors, we found some very juicy recollections of the kind of ritual that typically went on in this bar – how young sailors were being lured in as a sort of prank by older sailors, how these youngsters tended to be awestruck by the Hollywood-star prettiness of the women, and how they would be made to drink so much (and sometimes be drugged as well) until they woke up in bed upstairs only to find they had been sleeping with a man. It’s fair to speculate that some of the visiting sailors must have known they were going to be able to sleep with a man at Danny’s Bar and must have returned to the place to experiment with sexual desires and gender identities that fell outside the mainstream norms of their day and age.

Q. Are there any signs left of Danny’s Bar?

A. Not unless you have x-ray vision. The street is now almost entirely residential, though there is a modern-day “brasserie” in the house where the bar used to be. If walls could talk!

Q. These recollections of Danny’s Bar take us automatically into the second half of the twentieth century, I guess?

A. Yes they do. On the eve of the Second World War, we know that the Skippers Quarter had acquired a gay connotation to those in the know. Yet it didn’t stick to that area. After the war, its gay nightlife started to spread beyond the city’s traditional red-light district. A few of these new bars were still nearby, in the area around the Cathedral and the City Hall, but the majority sprang up close to the Central Station. This is also when we’re beginning to see some diversification. The Shakespeare, for instance, was a bar in the historic center. On the one hand, it was still occasionally visited by sailors and sex workers. On the other, and more importantly, it had a female bartender and gradually came to attract a female crowd – a niche for which there hadn’t been a market yet in the Skippers Quarter.

Meanwhile, in the working-class streets leading toward the Central Station, a number of bars were opening that were all operated by men and served a male clientele – places like Fortunia, Week-End (later known as La Vie en Rose), and La Ronde. These were generally small operations. One of the streets, the Van Schoonhovenstraat, would go on to sport more than twenty such gay bars. In this picture I recently took, you get a sense of what this may have been like when you look at the structure of the street front, for instance the houses in the middle painted in blue and mauve (one of them surviving as a sex shop):

But the Van Schoonhovenstraat wasn’t the only street. Even if nearly all of the area’s gay bars have in turn disappeared, you might still recognize this iconic place, the one with the greatest staying power and cult status:

Q. Ah yes, Café Strange! It’s in the Dambruggestraat, right?

A. Yes, and it still allows you to step into a time machine and take a trip down memory lane. We used it as our prime architectural case study, because its history shows you a lot about such gay bars in the second half of the twentieth century. A few facts and details hopefully help bring this history to life.

Café Strange was started by a gay couple as a gay-friendly “brasserie” back in 1955. The name, “Strange,” was meant to be suggestive without being explicit. In those years, the curtains behind the windows were still systematically drawn so that no passerby could look inside. You couldn’t just step inside either, but had to knock or ring a bell and wait for someone to let you in. To expedite this process, a small porch was constructed so that you could first step into the anonymous porch, close the door behind you and then open the door to the actual café – all with an eye to being as discrete as possible.

Over the years, the bar became so successful that its interior had to be reorganized and expanded so that it could accommodate not only a buffet at the back but also make some space for a dance floor. The café had a good reputation for many years until one of the owners died in the mid-seventies and his remaining partner got into various kinds of trouble that ended dramatically with his getting killed. It was then that a new gay couple, Armand and Roger, took over – you probably know Armand as the remaining owner. This was in 1980, in the era of early emancipation, and so they decided to be less discrete by painting the building’s façade in a sort of pink and adding a drawing of a sexy sailor on the outside. Inside, pictures of semi-naked and naked men were hung on the walls. The buffet was moved to the front of the room and a professional DJ was hired to turn the place into a small part-time disco. For a while, the owners even produced their own little magazine to inform gay patrons about leisure opportunities – remember that this was before the internet made looking up such information a piece of cake.

The first decades under the new owners went well: the place had the reputation of being at the same time modern, unpretentious, and laid back. There were a lot of flamboyant theme parties in which patrons could win grand prizes such as a flight to Athens or a weekend in Amsterdam or Paris. What’s interesting to observe also about the history of Café Strange is the shift in demographic over the years: while in the 1980s you could find a mix of gays, lesbians, and bisexuals from a wide range of ages and social classes in the bar, this narrowed down in the 1990s to mostly gay men, and then by the new millennium morphed again into a mix of gay and gay-friendly visitors. Indeed, by the nineties, these smaller gay bars in especially the area close to the station were increasingly being pushed out of business by a new type of venue, such as The Hessenhuis.

A building with a totally different allure, of course. It’s originally from 1564 and part of the city’s historical patrimony. After undergoing renovation in 1975, it reopened as a temporary exhibition space, and then in 1993 a gay-friendly bar opened that doubled at night as a club for mainly gay youngsters. Soon, the Hessenhuis became one of their two favorite commercial nightlife venues, together with the Red & Blue. This new generation of larger, trendier, more spectacular, and essentially self-contained clubs gradually drove the small gay bars out of the market, and thus also put an end to the sense of a particular neighborhood or area in which many such bars were clustered.

Today, much of the city’s history of gay and lesbian nighttime entertainment has evaporated and become materially invisible in the streetscape. There was a time, during the second half of the twentieth century, that Antwerp contained literally dozens of gay and lesbian bars, but almost none of these survive now. Unfortunately, I’m not aware that anyone is actively trying to honor this material history by installing commemorative plaques or making exhibitions about it. It survives mostly in the memory of an aging cohort of participants, hence my insistence at the outset about the relative difficulty of bringing my topic to life to a younger generation raised on a constant stream of immersive images. But perhaps now that Alexander, Rob, and I have made our first archeological efforts and undertaken a basic form of mental mapping, a curious young historian will come along to flesh out our very schematic findings and dig up all the beautiful, funny, and naughty traces of queer nightlife that may still be hiding in public and private archives. Wouldn’t that be wonderful?

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oaesiir-beloved-of-heaven · 6 years ago

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How Mowing Your Lawn will Save American Civilization

A little neglect may breed mischief ...

for want of a nail, the shoe was lost;

for want of a shoe the horse was lost;

and for want of a horse the rider was lost.

—Benjamin Franklin

Poor Richard's Almanac, preface (1758)

American habits our forefathers practiced are often the subject of ridicule today. The image of the American father has changed in modern perception; he is now fat, bumbling, politically backward, balding, an alcoholic who's chief indulgence is piss beer. The image of such a man in shorts drinking a Monster Zero riding his lawnmower at the crack of dawn is now a literal meme across the internet.

Make no mistake; such critical viewpoints are another symptom of the self-flagellating masochism which has gripped the American people for nearly a century. Optimism and zeal gave way in the modern discourse to malcontent and apathy after the first nuclear bombs were dropped on Japan. From our newfound place of unquestionable superiority Americans began to ask new questions from the safety of supremacy so far removed from the struggle that put them there: have we gone too far? Have we traveled across the last frontier and made it from sea to shining sea in the name of an Empire of Liberty only to have lost ourselves along the way? Can a nation such as ours even exist - does it deserve to exist?

Self-criticism is indeed a virtue and it has been practiced in the American people since household names like Paul Revere and Patrick Henry questioned the merit of the Constitution we now know as our founding document. Later it manifested when people like Henry David Thoreau refused to pay taxes which he knew would go to support the Mexican-American War which he - wrongly - felt was an unjustified act of imperialist aggression.

It’s important to be able to have something to measure yourself against whether it be a moral standard or a friend who is the whetstone that keeps your mind sharp. But what we see now is quite different. We are not seeing critics of American policy and culture coming from a place of love and admiration but rather malice. These critics do not want to see America do better because we can be better but rather they want the Republic to fail and be replaced with something more to their liking, damn the rest of the American people.

Let’s ask ourselves not just what today’s criticisms of American habits are but where they come from. Isn’t there a difference between a friend at the bar telling you that you’ve had a bit too much to drink and an adversary among your peers who considers the mere presence of a bottle of whiskey in your home as a sign of crippling dependency?

Who really is benefiting from the collapse of American self-confidence? It’s not you or me, it’s not our allies, it’s not the free world, nor our communities, municipalities, states, and greater democracy. What Americans need now is to reclaim themselves and their virtues and not abandon them wholesale.

The unique and truly powerful aspect of America’s democracy is that its maintenance falls to all citizens and not a political class. The already quoted Benjamin Franklin was an advocate of the necessity of an educated class of voters who were politically and civically active. The goals of such virtue can be found all over the many institutions of America he helped establish like fire departments and public libraries. It does not fall to the government alone or the elite to maintain society but the active efforts of us all. Civic virtue is the heart and soul of a voluntary society.

Now that I’ve impressed all this upon you the inevitable question must be arising: what does this have to do with lawn care?

Have you ever remarked on the true difference between a cultured and uncultured lawn? Many people consider the mere act of attempting to tame the wilderness on their property a Sisyphean one to be delegated to others if it is to be done at all. But allow me to describe to you the consequences of not tending one’s lawn particularly if you are like me and live in the wilderness where nature is not far away.

In tall grass parasites and other harmful insects come to reside. Ants inevitably make their homes in the soil with the other smaller creatures nearby being a natural source of food with the tall grass providing excellent protection for their mounds. Mice, opossums, armadillos, squirrels, badgers and other small mammals will also find solitude and resources within the fields. Then come snakes looking for meals and like the ants shelter in the soil beneath the tall grass. Soon coyotes and wolves will come looking for food as well with the overgrown ground being perfect hunting ground. Trees and other thick foliage can grow making traversing the ground and assessing it difficult. Nevermind the hazard and untended tree can pose to people or their property. Not all the plants will be benign either; thorns, poison ivy, thistles and other harmful nuisances will emerge. The more wild the acre the more wildlife will come to call it home. Soon enough you’re living in the middle of a small forest that is anything but suited to your comfortable living or the pleasure of your guests and neighbors. A hole or two could appear in the ground as well and you’d never be the wiser or perhaps a bog.

It is clear now to the astute reader what merit my quote has at the beginning of this essay. A simple weekly ritual taking only a few hours of your day might prevent all of these calamities. Though many of us would rather others do it or simply not do it at all I believe it is an edifying exercise of body and mind. A well-groomed property has many possibilities. New spaces for recreation and projects, habitation for animals that might prove beneficial for food, work, or as companions. Trees, plants and crops which while not enough to take to market might prove a healthy snack while out and about or simply a conversation piece and another reason your friends and neighbors love to visit because it means succulent pears or juicy persimmons.

This is not a simple statement of my love for landscaping or a suggestion you take up the hobby; it is an allegory for how our own virtue in daily life can and will improve our democracy. Too often we shove off our duties as citizens on government functionaries and when we do this we exchange a piece of our freedom for security and hope it doesn’t backfire or such powers do not come into the hands of villains and despots.

It is easy to mock older people and past generations for their seemingly provincial passions and lifestyles. But when we do so we lose something valuable as when we discard a culture or people because we view them as savage and uncouth. I’m not suggesting we should wholesale revive the past with all its ill trappings but consider that perhaps there is something to the more grounded practices of our parents and grandparents and beyond. Think about all the things they know/knew how to do but you’re clueless on. How does that negatively impact you? How does it negatively impact your community? Let’s not get bogged down in archaic reaction and get locked into the idea of turning back the lock; that’s not what this is about. It’s about sifting through the living examples of our ancestors and harvesting gold from mud. It goes beyond simple lawncare. America is not a nation of blood and soil but almost a religion maintained by our beliefs and the practice of those beliefs. That the best person to govern a community is its constituents. How can we maintain such a free society without a morally astute, self-reliant people? We cannot. Our goal should be to mold ourselves into such people. A man who can take care of himself is a free man. Together with the product of our own labor in hand we can contribute to the common weal overall. This is the frontier mindset. The free man’s mindset. We do not sit idly by and let our world pass us by; we ride the tiger, we tame the bucking bronco.

Now the full breadth and scope of this practical analogy is revealed to you. We must reclaim the American spirit of independence and self-reliance to maintain a voluntary and democratic society. Put down the comic book and grab a newspaper. Seek out real edifying literature that informs you about the doctrines and theories of our government and practical books that can make you more handy. Go less to the auto shop and pick up a Hayne’s manual and some tools. Learn some simple homespun recipes and stop eating out whenever hunger calls. Pay more attention to your local government and find ways you can make your voice heard and exert your will in the ballot box. This is the truest way to a free society: one where we are less dependent and more independent. One where we have the power and tools to more readily help and advise our neighbors and we have the skills and resources to collaborate. It makes our modern society with all its hard-won excess and bounty a boon and not a dependence to survive.

It’s warming up outside; the sun is out more and a cold breeze is always at your back. So why not roll up your sleeves and do your part to make your community that much greener and yourself that much more free?

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vmheadquarters · 6 years ago

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Twelve years ago today, UPN (RIP!) premiered a cult-classic neo-noir about murder, class warfare, sexual assault, and forbidden love. It was quippy and campy and smart as hell—and it just happened to center on a pint-sized blonde who looked like a cheerleader but thought like Sherlock Holmes. The show was Veronica Mars, and even if the last decade has muddled its legacy with a much-hyped but ultimately disappointing fan-funded follow-up film and, of course, the extremely meh third season, the high school years remain an unparalleled success. Veronica Mars seasons one and two were better than anything that had come before, far surpassed its competition in quality, and set a high bar for future shows that has only barely been met by a few episodes of television here and there. So give my regards to Friday Night Lights (a family show, not a teen show) and Degrassi (please), but Veronica Mars is the best teen show of all time*.

1. Nuanced Class Conflict

Gossip Girl and The OC did it well, but Veronica Mars did it better. Even though Neptune, CA, is technically fictional, it's as real a place as has ever been portrayed on television. Its particular problems and reputation informed everything from law enforcement (the question of whether or not to incorporate the town into a city and make the sheriff's office into a police department) to the biker gangs riding through on their way up and down the PCH. The levels of privilege/lack thereof were so nuanced and specific. Other shows divide people into the Haves and the Have Nots; on Veronica Mars, everyone has something a little different. At the bottom of the socioeconomic ladder is Weevil, whose background is not only impoverished but criminal; the only community he can "afford" is a gang (though his crew isn't all bad—you'll find nary a broad stroke or generalization in the world of Veronica Mars). In the center of things are Veronica and Keith, who lived comfortably when Keith was sheriff, but have buckled their belts since he became a private eye. On the one hand, they own a small business! On the other, they live in a pretty crap apartment complex and have nowhere near enough saved to send Veronica to college. Then there's the nouveau-riche Echolls', who have all the glamorous trappings of wealth (cars, booze, mansion) and pretty much none of the cultural capital. At the top of the heap are the Kanes; while the Echolls' have enough money to "get away" with murder, the Kanes have enough money to get away with it, cover it up, frame someone else for it, and get the sheriff fired for looking into it. Money problems are basically the least-juicy of TV plots, but by using wealth disparity as a way to develop the characters, essentially building it into the DNA of the show, Veronica Mars created a TV universe just as interesting and complicated as that of Friday Night Lights or Parks and Recreation.

2. Lianne Mars

A girl with a missing mom is a fairy tale trope as old as time, rooted in a deification-of-the-female version of misogyny that I don't have time to get into right now. Suffice it to say, a dead or absentee mother is usually a sign of lazy writing. It's a way to reduce the character count and set a heroine adrift while, not coincidentally, making it so the (usually male) writer doesn't have to think of what a grown woman would think or talk or act like. At first, this is the fate of Veronica's mother, Lianne Mars. She was just conveniently...gone, another casualty of the fallout from the Lilly Kane murder investigation. Her absence lets Veronica be angsty and ill-supervised even as Keith Mars entered the canon of Bestest TV Dads of All Time (which he is! Love Keith forever and ever). But then she came back, with baggage, and the trope was, if not redeemed, at least put to good use. Lianne is an alcoholic who couldn't deal with the disappointing turns life took, and she finally cracked when her husband ran directly into conflict with her lost love Jake Kane, for whom she still pined. Even when she decides she wants to be a mom again, she can't quit being an alcoholic. And as heartbreaking as it is to watch Veronica play the parent, it's also a moment of growth. Veronica realizes—or rather, decides—that she isn't doomed to repeat her mother's mistakes. She is a stronger, better person than Lianne. A person big enough to love her flawed mother, even strong enough to forgive her. In the third episode, Veronica says, "The hero is the one that stays, and the villain is the one that splits." By the end of the series, Veronica has learned what true villainy looks like, and it ain't her mom. Showrunners, take note: This is how you do a realistic redemption story.

3. The Guest Stars and Bit Players

The casting department at Veronica Mars did flawless work. Obviously, the core cast is great, but the semi-regulars and guests are also amazing. There's an entire season devoted to Steve fucking Guttenberg. Lisa Rinna and Harry Hamlin play the negaverse versions of themselves. Ryan Hansen and Ken Marino do their Ryan Hansen/Ken Marino Shtick, and why shouldn't they? Max Greenfield (a.k.a. Schmidt on New Girl) and Tessa Thompson (from Dear White People and Creed) both had recurring roles long before they were famous, and even Tina Majorino (Mac) and Michael Muhney (Lamb), who didn't really "break out" in a major way after the show, are perfect in their roles. The second (SECOND) IMDb credit for one Jessica Chastain is an episode of Veronica Mars, and of course, Leighton Meester appears in two episodes. Yes, there are other teen shows that feature young actors who went on to bigger, better things, but I maintain that Veronica Mars is notable for encouraging real actors to do real work.

4. The Mysteries Were Smart AF

The show trusted its audience to keep up and pay attention. Maybe even a little too much. In the era before binge-watching and old episodes being able on demand, Veronica Mars suffered from the same issue that plagues the first few seasons of The X Files: Viewers who weren't "caught up" on the season-long mystery arc found it difficult to get into. VM had low ratings throughout its run, and when it used the shift from high school to college to introduce shorter, quicker mysteries, well, we all know how season three went. But looking back, it's clear that the show was ahead of its time, telling smart, twist-y weekly stories while teasing out a longer mystery that deeply impacted the main characters' lives. (Can't you just imagine how they'd advertise the show now? Moody teaser trailers with the tag line "Who Killed Lilly Kane?" and fansites and podcasts devoted to all the clues and hints and easter eggs from every episode?) There are other teen mystery/crime-fighter shows, sure, but they tend to put their characters in immediate peril, which makes the audience ask, "What's going to happen?" Instead, Veronica Mars is an intellectual exercise, evidence and theory based, and the question becomes, "What has already happened, and what does it mean?" That's the kind of meaty writing that inspires, if not legions of fans, a loyal audience to sing its praises. Veronica Mars was so smart it was niche. I'm not making a case for VM as overlooked prestige television, but then again I totally am. WHY didn't it win any Emmys?

5. They Didn't Explain Every Little Thing

See: above "trusting the audience smartness" factor. They didn't explain why sleeping with a "consenting" teenager is still wrong, or why Logan and Veronica went from adversaries to lovers in the space of like, a week, or why money equals power. They got that the audience got it. So, the exact opposite of a show like, say, Secret Life of the American Teenager. There were episodes that touched on privilege and entitlement and infidelity and the abuse of power by law enforcement, but it was subtle and real instead of, you know...Degrassi.

6. The Humor

It wasn't dark and humorous, it was darkly humorous and humorously dark. (Think combining the creepy weirdness of Twin Peaks with the banter of Moonlighting.) Logan's poignant answering machine messages, Veronica's epic takedowns, even Lamb got to be withering and snarky while he systematically fucked over the whole town.The humor kept us invested even when stories dipped into sentimental, Dawson's Creek-esque territory and deflected the romance-y moments that might have turned it into a mystery-style Felicity. Veronica's and Logan's jokes, in particular, also serve a psychological purpose: mask their pain at any cost. Unlike in Gilmore Girls, where every character speaks like a hyper-intelligent stand-up comic and not at all like a teenager or real human being, Veronica and the residents of Neptune make comments that feel true to their characters and relevant to their circumstances. If you watched any episode of Scream Queens and thought, "I guess they're trying to imitate...Scream? Heathers? Clueless? With the smart/bitchy blondes and the snappy comebacks and the eye rolls?" I understand. But actually, they were trying (and failing. Hard.) to do Veronica Mars. Smart sassy cute mean heart of gold flirty clever repartee? Yeah, that's Veronica Mars, and Ryan Murphy, bless his soul, is not Rob Thomas.

7. The Rape Plot(s)

From the very first episode when, in a flashback, golden-haired, white dress-clad Veronica walks, almost in a stupor (have you ever seen a more "perfect" victim?) into the sheriff's office to tell Lamb that she was raped—because she is a good girl and good girls go to the authorities—only to have him, basically, shrug it off, rape and sexual assault were core themes of the show, central to its purpose and story engine. Creator Rob Thomas initially envisioned the story as a YA novel with a male protagonist, and changing the lead's gender to female is arguably the best and most important decision he ever made. Veronica's sexuality is everything. How she flirts her way out of scrapes, plays innocent when it can help her, distrusts it when she's attracted to the "wrong" person, is allowed to enjoy it with Logan and, of course, how her virginity was taken from her one night she can't quite remember. The show takes Veronica's rape seriously as not just a plot point or easy motivation, but as a defining part of her character. She cleans obsessively and looks over her shoulder. She's sensitive to the potential aggressors—and victims—at her school. She knows that her rapist was someone she knew, and she has to live with that mystery every day. But it's complicated. That night she can't remember might have been semi-consensual, but then we learn, no it wasn't. Yes, there's a story about a false rape accusation (against Adam Scott!), but the truth only makes the situation murkier. And in an unfortunately rare move, Veronica Mars also depicts the aftermath of the sexual abuse of boys, including an exploration of how the stigma against male assault survivors re-traumatizes them. (The third season is, in my opinion, a missed opportunity to tackle the campus rape epidemic. By blaming the rapes on a psychological experiment gone awry, the show unfortunately ignores the fact that toxic masculinity isn't a role-playing aberration but a pervasive national issue. But its heart is in the right place, if not its logic.)

8. Veronica

Choker-wearing, dog-owning, private-detectiving blonde badass Veronica Mars. She's most often compared to Buffy, that other crime-fighting cutie with a ragtag army of friends and a ne'er do well love interest, and the comparison is apt. Both possess skills their peers do not and use those skills to solve problems both thrust upon them and sought. But the difference is that in the space that Buffy uses to explore the supernatural, Veronica Mars plays with loyalty and ethics. Is it wrong to snitch on your friends? Is a rumor evidence? Can you break the law to serve a higher good? These are issues Buffy doesn't wrestle with; it's pretty much a given that evil vampires are worth defeating (yes, there are definitely instances when Buffy is tested because she's fallen for a vamp or one of her friends is possessed or whatever, but that's not like, the thing of the show). And while so many other "outsider/observer/new kid" teen show protagonists (Ryan, Dan, Dawson, Lindsay Weir) long to get "in," Veronica's been there. She's been popular, and (a little) wealthy. She's not exploring a new world, she's re-learning her old one. In that she has more in common with Angela Chase, but way less whiny. You watch My So-Called Life and think, I'm totally Angela. You watch VMand think, I wish I were Veronica. When people talk about the strong but vulnerable but smart but flawed but cool but real but beautiful but relatable but empowered but conflicted but modern but iconic but a good role model but not unattainable with a job not defined by that job "interesting" female characters on television, a few names tend to come up again and again: Carrie, Murphy, Ally, Roseanne, Olivia, Dana. To that (very white!) pantheon I humbly submit: Veronica.

*....except for Freaks and Geeks.

#veronica mars

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balwinderthandi · 3 years ago

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Vidiq vs Tubebuddy Secrets Exposed! Here are the Juicy Details🔥

TubeBuddy and VidIQ are both excellent channel management tools, but do they really differ that much? We'll compare TubeBuddy and VidIQ to help you figure out which is the best option for you.

YouTube videos, the king of video, will generate 20X more interaction and, as a result, more revenue than any other social media site.

So, let's imagine you've got a fantastic video in the works for YouTube's billions of users. You've got thumb-stopping material in what is, regrettably, the most ADHD platform on the planet, with a great theme, sound, and stunning pictures.

The problem about YouTube is that even the most relevant and genuine content can get lost in the shuffle. Making a video and making sure it's seen by your target audience are two very different things. Video marketing is not for the faint of heart.

Why YouTubers Need Toolkits for Channel Management

YouTube, like all other social media accounts, requires a significant amount of care and control effort.

Responding to millions of comments while updating content to keep the audience happy will take a lot of effort and patience for a YouTube account with over a million subscribers. You'll spend so much time administering that account that you'll finally run out of time to develop fresh material!

If you neglect your audience and fail to answer to them in a timely manner, you will end up losing them altogether. Active participation is the key to YouTube success.

Your YouTube channel requires more than the usual YouTube studio. So, how do you make sure that all of your videos are optimised for YouTube and that you stay on top of your account's activity?

Easy! Get a programme that will automate that time-consuming publishing procedure, and take a step further with YouTube channel moderation and marketing plan to improve your YouTube results. TubeBuddy is one of the most powerful tools for this.

VidIQ vs the TubeBuddy: So what was the Difference?

TubeBuddy may be used as an extension to Chrome, Firefox and a Safari browser, while VidIQ is accessible for Chrome browser extensions exclusively.

TubeBuddy offers better analysis and data, whereas VidIQ's insights are more fundamental

The paid VidIQ subscription starts at a lower price point of $7.50 a month, compared to $9 per month for TubeBuddy.

TubeBuddy

TubeBuddy's purpose is to use its range of amazing tools to make you happier and more productive while YouTubing.

It's a browser plugin that doubles as a YouTube tool in a flash, giving your publishing tools a boost. It helps you optimise and build your YouTube channel by providing publishing and content management features.

Its capacity to manage annotations and cards, which are critical to traffic, is its silver bullet. Consider how much time you'll save by using this tool to update the 60-second cards you need to include in your webinar videos.

TubeBuddy will take over these responsibilities, performing them more intelligently and efficiently. It will also help with video optimization analytics and tubular insights (general channel analytics), as well as improving your overall strategy.

Tubebuddy's Main Features are:

Productivity Tools

Sunset videos, playlist actions (playlists), emoji picker, scripted answers, and scheduled video management changes to card templates are just a few examples.

Emoji Picker: According to research, emoji usage for marketing content has increased by up to 775 percent per year. You can utilize these tiny expressive bits of information in your descriptions and titles now that YouTube enables them. Emojis are searchable on YouTube and can be used to find specific videos as long as they are relevant. You can use the Emoji Picker to add emoji icons to your material so that it stands out in a sea of similar videos.

Thumbnail Maker: A video thumbnail is the first thing that browsers on YouTube see, and it either makes a favorable impression or doesn't. A professionally crafted thumbnail image will increase traffic to your channel. It's never been easy to create them with standard programmes like Photoshop, which is why TubeBuddy's unique Thumbnail Generator is so popular.

Bulk Processing Tools

Bulk copy cards, remove cards, update cards, and copy end screen are among TubeBuddy's bulk processing tools, to mention a few. These tools are designed to keep you from pulling out your hair while manually adding, managing, and updating the cards, titles, and descriptions of your bulk films.

Bulk Copy Cards: YouTube cards can not only direct your viewers to URLs, but they can also help to increase video participation. This function will support you in load those cards, giving you more time on your hands.

Bulk Find, Replace, and Append: This tool is fantastic for removing video descriptions and titles from a previous Webinar and adding them to a new one. It allows you to quickly find all titles, tags, and descriptions among a large number of videos and append or replace them.

You may also use this application to mass update those old hyperlinks while eliminating all current references where appropriate if you have a new website to which you'd like to link the movies.

YouTube SEO Tool

For Youtube SEO or the search results ranking, keyword tools and keyword optimization (including keyword research) are vital to achieving significant viewership. TubeBuddy includes a comprehensive range of video SEO tool tools like rank keyword tracking, unsuggested, tag service, auto translation and tag lists.

This keyword tool enables you to improve your listing so that content appears on global viewing listings and trending videos as a related video (keyword research tools).

Auto Translator

This tool is just what you'll need to take your YouTube channel global. To enhance your viewership, it will convert those descriptions, video tags, and title into multiple languages.

Keyword Rank Tracking

Many YouTube content creators have the most common dream that they have their material on the recommended YouTube list. This may not be achievable in all case, but a lot of YouTube material is generally discovered by searching. This makes keywords particularly ideal for classification.

If you can't track your video SEO performance, your efforts can be futile, because video performance will not be feedbacked. Keyword Tracking Tool TubeBuddy does not just check the impact of your video SEO, but also the performance of your opponent!

Promotional Items

Publish your killer work on YouTube, but it will be invisible to traffic if you don't market it. TubeBuddy promos include a share tracker, description promotion, voucher offer, subscriber outreach and video promotions.

Share Tracker

This tool enables you to build promotional links to your email campaigns or website campaigns. These links are optimized for you to follow your click-throughs and other relevant marketing data

Tools for Data and Research

Tube Buddy's analytics and research tools will provide you with enough information to understand how your channels and videos are performing on YouTube. After that, you can innovate and develop growth methods to ensure that your channel continues to grow. Video anlytics, Channel anlytics, Health Report, Brand Alerts, and Competitor Scorecard are just a few of the fantastic tools available.

Report on Health Conditions

An examination of your videos, as well as the overall performance and health of your channel, will make it easier to determine what works and what doesn't for you. This tool is made for this purpose and gives demographics, search traffic (search volume), and viewing time information.

Greetings from Brand

When a video about you or your channel is uploaded to the internet, Brand Alerts will notify you. It will also keep an eye on YouTube for any new content that features you or your competitors, essentially whenever they post a video to their channel.

VidIQ

The ultimate goal of a YouTube content creator is to collect a large number of adoring subscribers. It's not easy to grow a YouTube following. However, creating fantastic content, posting it, and expecting that the YouTube gods will shine on your content and make you famous isn't going to work either.

To boost the visibility of their channel, a YouTuber must take advantage of any chance that comes their way. Today, being a YouTube creator gives you far more clout than being a typical Hollywood star. In fact, 70% of YouTube's teen users feel that YouTube influencers are more relatable than celebrities!

The way to exposure is paved with data, and VidIQ is a YouTube-certified management and audience development tool package that's ideal for such SEO projects.

VidIQ vision works seamlessly with YouTube, aiding you with features like as scheduled video upload, YouTube SEO, Twitter and Facebook interaction data and insights, comment moderation, and bulk description video editing capabilities, among others. VidIQ essentially automates channel management and digital marketing so that you may reach a larger audience.

VidIQ is available as a plugin or a browser extension (browser plugin) and is very easy to use. VidIQ neatly stays as an IQ symbol on the right of your browser toolbar, unlike Tube Buddy, whose dashboard tends to cover up your screen. When needed, you can view its analytics and real-time trending data bar panel on the right side of your video material.

Many VidIQ features, like TubeBuddy, are available for free (free plan), allowing you to try it out before investing in its premium features. Here are some of VidIQ‘s best features.

Custom Reporting and Analysis

This VidIQ tool assists YouTube creators in identifying what factors have a big impact on their channel's view time. An engagement analytics graph, for example, provides a bird's eye view of all your channel's Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube engagement numbers in one place.

VidIQ's analytics features are far superior to those of YouTube because they are well-organized and visually appealing.

When publishing to YouTube, there is a tool called "Best Time of Day" that ensures that your channel's programming schedule is covered for maximum engagement.

If you're interested about your audience's demographics, such as gender or geography, you may look them up using the YouTube Audience Demographics feature.

Another analytics component you might like is the viewer sources data by watch time, which includes top Google and YouTube top keywords and keyword phrases that drive watch time.

Identifying Influencers

A great analytics solution should provide you with a subscriber analysis, and VidIQ has it down pat. This information will show you who is viewing, commenting on, and liking your work.

This functionality is also useful if you want to discover what your subscribers are watching on other channels or which ones they subscribe to in addition to yours.

This premium tool will assist you in identifying your super fans and determining how to connect with them for long-term engagement.

Management of the Channels

VidIQ's premium channel management services provide channel audit data, YouTube analytics, as well as support and account strategies, to guarantee that your content plan is tailored to your audience.

Automated workflows

Long-tail keywords, a keyword research module, keyword recommendation (and the proper keywords in general), tags, cards, and annotations, in addition to exceptional content, will assist subscribers in swiftly finding your material and increasing their watch time.

These items need to be optimized for higher efficiency, but with a 500-character limit on YouTube tags, you'd need a lot of time to handle it manually for the hundreds of films you might have on your channel.

VidIQ's workflow automation tool will save you money, time, and sanity by automating these activities, allowing you to focus on what you do best: generating great content!

Management of the community

Every YouTuber likes it when their viewers are involved enough to leave a remark, but what if all of your fans decide to leave hundreds of comments? VidIQ can be used to control comments, community participation, and video submissions.

Comparison among both TubeBuddy vs VidIQ

If you want to provide the best stuff to your users, both VidIQ and TubeBuddy have a lot to offer. They also make monitoring and moderating big YouTube accounts a simple. Their video SEO and analytics features are really beneficial.

TubeBuddy's creators are a friendly bunch, and their relationship with the YouTube community has helped TubeBuddy become a popular choice among users. People admire their ability to provide useful updates that keep them ahead of the competition.

Their fantastic thumbnail tool for uploading featured photos to YouTube is particularly noteworthy (quality images can increase ranking and CTRs).

Is it Possible to use VidIQ and TubeBuddy all at once?

It's possible, and I've done it before to compare features. It does, however, create for a busy interface. One method to make this work is to turn off and on key elements that the other platform excels at, resulting in the ideal blend that meets your goals. Both products have modest software subscription prices, so it's not an entirely impossible notion!

Final Words on VidIQ and TubeBuddy

Finally, both VidIQ and TubeBuddy are extremely useful to social YouTubers and offer unequalled quality. So, whether you go with VidIQ or TubeBuddy, the key is to choose one that fits your budget or has the free features you prefer or find more convenient to use.

What is the best combination? If you have the budget, I believe that using TubeBuddy Legend in conjunction with VidIQ Pro (about $60/month) is the BEST arrangement. Otherwise, TubeBuddy Pro is the way to go for accounts with fewer than 1000 subscribers.

Otherwise, VidIQ is a better option if you're concerned about disclosing personal information and/or want a more attractive and accessible YouTube statistics interface.

#tubebuddy vs vidiq #vidiq #tubebuddy #balwinder thandi #youtube #youtube tools #youtubeseo

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lovelacedx · 7 years ago

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When: October, 2017

Out of all of her appointments for the day, Fern was looking forward to this one the most. He was a new client, coming in to have his tarot cards read and she had already done her research. She had just blown out the lavender incense burning in the corner of the parlor when the door opened and in walked Jesse Andrews.

Fern knew who he was, of course. People seemed to believe that she lived her life walking through graveyards and communicating with the spirits in the beyond, but she enjoyed a good party as much as the next. Especially if she could make a quick buck off some girl drunk enough to believe any bullshit she spewed out while waiting for her drink at the bar. Behind the lush drapes, she waited, pretending not to have heard him just to see what he’d do. It was usually a good way to get a read on someone. If they waited patiently on the old velvet loveseat in the drawing room, they weren’t as inquisitive, or their nerves would often get the better of them. If they wandered around the room, looking at the accoutrements lining the walls or picking up the book she left out specifically for that reason, they tended to make themselves at home wherever they were, comfortable in any situation.

Jesse kept standing, glancing around the room and called out, “Hello?” and it was time for Fern to make her grand appearance. Not with smoke or an overly tacky accent that was reminiscent of the crappy late night television psychics from the 90’s, but with a soothing smile and a delicate handshake.

“Mr. Andrews. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Jesse.” He smiled quickly, clearly a little uncomfortable but the soft smile remained on her face. After he shook her hand, he shoved his right back into his pocket. She’d be willing to bet it was to keep from displaying a nervous habit. Flicking his fingers, drumming them, picking at his nails, something you didn’t let people see. No one wanted anyone to have any real sort of information on them and a tell was the worst kind of information. Someone knowing when you were nervous could essentially ruin you if they got their hands on a juicy tidbit of gossip that turned out to be true. “Yeah, likewise. Look, can we just get this over with? I’ve got some place to be tonight.”

She couldn’t have asked for a better opening. He was in a rush to get out of there, even though he was the one that called this meeting. “Ah, yes, you have a gig tonight, don’t you? Where are you spinning?” He raised an eyebrow, all while she smiled serenely. Please fall for it, please fall for it.

“I never told you what I did for a living.” Hook, line, and sinker.

“You didn’t have to, dear. The spirits did.” Wikipedia and the inability to sleep at night did, actually. He didn’t look like he was necessarily buying it, but he was still there and seemed to grow a bit more uncomfortable, shifting his weight between his feet. “Shall we get started?” He gestured for her to lead the way and she sauntered off towards the parlor where she did the readings. A wooden table sat in the middle of the room with two chairs on either side. They were both velvet lined but they didn’t match, as it would take a little bit away from the idea that she scavenged for what she had and that it was all given to her by her goddess. Finding out she got them from a furniture store a couple blocks away would really ruin the mood she worked so carefully to set.

The room itself was lit up with string lights, a vase with day old flowers starting to wilt on the chest she kept all of her things in. Granted, it was a false bottom and there really wasn’t much in there, but no one ever went looking. It was bad karma to go snooping around what didn’t concern you. The crowning glory, though, was the crystal ball that sat up on a shelf directly in the middle of the room, her crystal tiara balanced on it precariously. She never used either of them, they really were only for aesthetic appeal and people ate that shit up.

“Is Fern your real name?” he asked as he followed her in, glancing around the room. His eyes were drawn to the crystal ball, just as everyone else’s were and really, Andrews, be any more predictable.

She glanced back at him, eyebrows raised. “Is Jesse yours?”

“Point taken.”

Her favorite deck of tarot cards sat in the middle of the table and she motioned for him to sit at the side the cards were facing. She picked up the cards and shuffled them wordlessly, flawlessly, before holding them out for Jesse to take. “Take these and shuffle them.” He didn’t ask why or even look confused but the slight hesitation told her that he was questioning her words. “It will transfer some of your energy into the cards, so that you will have an accurate reading.” As he shuffled the cards to his heart’s content, she explained. “You’ve asked for a ‘mind, body, spirit’ reading.” She said this like she was announcing it to the powers that be, but it was more because she found a lot of her clients to be forgetful idiots and needed to be reminded of why they were here. “Three cards. Three ways to look at yourself.”

He handed the cards back and she sat them on the table, drawing the first one. “Mind.” When she flipped it, it was The Sun. The only bad thing was … it was facing her. “The Sun.” She paused for dramatic effect, making him wait out the result for just a moment before she continued, “When rightside up, The Sun means success and accomplishment, but sadly, it is reversed. That means loneliness and unhappiness. You find yourself longing for company that isn’t there …” Where he originally seemed to disbelieve her and (rightfully) think she was a fraud, he shifted, straightening where he sat. Okay, Fern. You’re on the right track.

“Body. The Nine of Cups … reversed.” He seriously needed to get his shit together. “You spend your time overindulging in things that only bring you pain. They will do nothing but hurt you at the rate you’re going.” If he at least had gotten it rightside up, it would have meant that his body was in decent shape, but she didn’t have to look very closely to notice the fact that his whole body just screamed exhausted: he’d been slouching on the way in, feet dragging a little, and the bags under his eyes were larger than the Prada purse she’d bought last week. He was hanging on her words now, desperately awaiting what she would say next, she could tell by the way he was leaning forward, leg beginning to shake under the table.

Last but not least, “Spirit.” She was hoping for him that this card was good, that he got something positive out of this session even though the negatives meant he had something to work on. “Justice.” Thank you, Maiden, Mother, and Crone. “Your spirit is focused harmony and equality. All you wish is for the world to be at peace and for the factions at hand to stop warring with each other.” Give him just enough information to satisfy him, leave him reflecting on himself instead of picking out a detail she might have messed up and narrowing in on that. It appeared that the spirits on the other side had spoken, but really, when your client was an out and proud transman, it wasn’t hard to figure out that he was tired of dealing with transphobia. “Mr. Andrews, I suggest you reevaluate what is truly important to you. You have a wonderful life and I would honestly hate for it to come down around you.”

He hadn’t said anything throughout the reading, not even a scoff that would have suggested she got something wrong. In fact … he seemed shaken. Shaken was a good sign, it meant that she had done her job well and used the tools at her disposal to get him to believe whatever crap she pulled out of her ass. He stood slowly and extended a hand again. “Thank you.”

“You’re quite welcome, dear.” And as he left the room, with his cash on the table, Fern breathed a sigh of relief.

A sucker was born every minute.

#glossypara #i hope you all enjoy jesse getting played for a fool

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ramajmedia · 5 years ago

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Star Trek: The 10 Biggest Deep Space Nine Twists and Reveals, Ranked

Deep Space Nine remains one of the most beloved (and controversial) entries in the Star Trek franchise. It bridged the gap between Star Trek: The Next Generation and Star Trek: Voyager, separating itself from its predecessors by taking place on a space station, not a Federation starship exploring the universe. It focused more on the interpersonal relationships of its inhabitants, rather than external situations.

This changed in later seasons, when it diverged from the normal episodic format of Star Trek and became a more serialized program with over-arching plots and inter-connected storylines. It's dark and gritty tone differed from Star Trek's normally upbeat and altruistic mode, but it never failed to capture fan's imagination with intriguing narratives and colorful characters. It was full of the most exciting plot twists and reveals of any Star Trek series. Below you'll find ten of the biggest, ranked.

10 ODO AND KIRA HAVING A RELATIONSHIP

Odo had a seemingly unrequited love for Kira, the brash Bajoran militia member for the length of DS9, and it made for some emotionally moving episodes. His feelings aside, viewers never expected Kira to return his affections, since nowhere in the series was it hinted at that she might have feelings for him in the same way.

Despite fans misgivings, Odo and Kira got together anyway. Their relationship was saccharine and pejorative, doing neither of their characters any favors. It never really made sense why someone like Kira would end up caring for Odo the same way he did her, and why Odo would sort of abandon their life together in pursuit of the Great Link.

RELATED: Star Trek: 10 Hysterical DS9 Logic Memes Only True Fans Understand

9 QUARK BECOMING THE GRAND NAGUS

Gentle, obedient Rom was one of the most wholesome characters on the show, and by that token, the worst Ferengi. Still, him ending up as Nagus was a great twist, if only because the position of the Grand Nagus had been previously offered to one of the most unscrupulous Ferengi, Quark.

Despite Rom's bumbling, in the middle of the series it was revealed that he actually had hidden talents. He may not have been the mathematician that Quark was, but his engineering prowess knew no bounds, which endeared him to his people and to the Bajoran militia. Quark on the other hand, though he was offered the position of Grand Nagus, turned it down to tend bar and run the holodeck.

8 WORF AND JADZIA'S MARRIAGE

On the surface it might have seemed like a contrivance to have Worf (the newly minted DS9 cast member) and Jadzia become an item. Worf was fresh off of Star Trek: The Next Generation, and seemed like an odd fit to the motley crew of established DS9 characters.

However, his bristly demeanor and abrupt candor matched well with Jadzia's forthright nature. They were both characters whose personalities had a way of making their fellow crew members uncomfortable. It was certainly more logical pairing than Worf and Counselor Troi. Plus, the wedding ceremony between Jadzia and Worf was a highlight amidst DS9's doom and gloom.

RELATED: Star Trek: The 10 Best Alien Starfleet Members Ever

7 MILES O'BRIEN TURNING OUT TO BE A CLONE

In one memorable episode, Miles O'Brien's behavior is just off enough to cause other members of the crew to grow suspicious. Viewers spend the entire episode thinking they're following the real Miles O'Brien on a bad day, only to discover at the conclusion it's actually a clone of the real Miles O'Brien, who ends up taking down the rogue version of himself.

In reality, the clone was an operative of the Dominion, sent to retrieve Federation intelligence from Deep Space Nine. As though that wasn't bad enough, Miles O'Brien also had an instance where an alien implanted memories from a 20 year stint in prison that he never experienced, but had to deal with emotionally. Poor Chief O'Brien!

6 GUL DUKAT BEING A TURNCOAT

Gul Dukat turning out to be, well, Gul Dukat wasn't that much of a plot twist, but if you consider he had started to get in the habit of helping Sisko and Co. in a period of grey morality for his character, it came as a punch to the gut. In some ways, the greater twist would have been for Gul Dukat to not side with the Dominion Empire in the last season of the series.

His perspective that the whole of Deep Space Nine and the Federation were doomed with the advancement of the The Founders was in line with his character's rationale, but many fans would have liked him to stay a part of the DS9 crew and possibly have explored his feelings for Kira.

RELATED: Star Trek: The 10 Deadliest Villains The Crew Has Ever Faced

5 BASHIR TURNING OUT TO BE AUGMENTED

Of all the doctors in all the Star Trek series, Dr. Julian Bashir had the best bedside manner. Dr. Beverly Crusher on Star Trek: The Next Generation comes a close second, but even she didn't have the natural charm and warmth of Dr. Bashir (we won't even touch Doc McCoy's ornery nature or the EMH's stuffy efficiency). The best parts of his personality turned into a lie when it was revealed that he had been altered as a young child.

His parents had allowed all sorts "upgrades" be given to the young boy to improve his reflexes, stamina, intelligence, and even his physical appearance. The best parts of Bashir's character turned out to be the product of genetic experimentation.

4 GARAK BEING A MEMBER OF THE OBSIDIAN ORDER

Garak was one of the most sensationalized characters on the series, if not all of Deep Space Nine itself. By day, he was a mild-mannered tailor on the promenade, and by night he was gossiping at Quark's bar, fishing for information. The fact that he was so congenial yet so private made him one of the most mysterious inhabitants of the station.

Fans eagerly awaited when Garak's past would finally be revealed - it was sure to be something juicy, especially since he was a Cardassian ex-pat. Garak turned out to be a high-ranking former member of the Obsidian Order, the Cardassian intelligence agency.

3 BASHIR BEING A SPY AND RECRUITED BY SECTION 31

In many ways Section 31, the Special Ops of the Federation with the ability to manipulate time and space, was a plot twist in and of itself. Suddenly, no plot-line was safe if Section 31 members were involved - it could go pear-shaped at a moment's notice depending on the episode narrative.

One of the most sudden reveals was the recruitment of Dr. Julian Bashir into their clandestine ranks. This was at the same time that Bashir was being accused of being a spy for the Dominion Empire. Apparently his augmented self was a prize for both agencies!

RELATED: Star Trek: 10 DS9 Storylines That Were Never Resolved

2 SISKO GOING OFF TO JOIN THE PROPHETS

Early on in DS9, Benjamin Sisko meets one of the religious leaders of the Bajoran people. As Commander of the space station Deep Space Nine, he has vowed to let all inhabitants peacefully practice their faiths, from the Bajorans (whose planet DS9 orbits) to the Cardassians that seek asylum. He takes a particular interest in the religious leader called Kai Opaka, the spiritual guide for all Bajorans.

It's through their initial meeting, and subsequent spiritual encounters that Sisko begins to learn of his true nature as a prophet, and spiritual guide to the universe. When he leaves at the end of DS9 to fulfill his duties, it seemed an odd twist for a Starfleet officer.

RELATED: Star Trek: 5 Reasons Why TNG Is The Best Spin-Off (And 5 Why It's DS9)

1 JULIAN BASHIR BEING A CHANGELING

Julian Bashir was part of several plot twists, some of which were received well by viewers and some of which that were considered ridiculous. One of the most effective occurred when Dr. Bashir turned out to be a Changeling, an operative sent by the Dominion Empire to infiltrate Deep Space Nine.

What was so fruitful about this plot twist was the fact that fans realized Dr. Bashir had done all sorts of things as "fake Bashir," including perform surgery on Commander Sisko! Not really knowing how long they'd been dutifully watching Dr. Bashir made for a twist no one could see coming (fans concede it was about five episodes, or a month's time).

NEXT: Star Trek: The 10 Biggest TNG Twists & Reveals, Ranked

source https://screenrant.com/star-trek-10-biggest-ds9-twists-reveals-ranked/

#screenrant

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teacherunicorn · 7 years ago

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Opposites Attract (Chapter 74)

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15 Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18 Chapter 19 Chapter 20 Chapter 21 Chapter 22 Chapter 23 Chapter 24 Chapter 25 Chapter 26 Chapter 27 Chapter 28 Chapter 29 Chapter 30 Chapter 31 Chapter 32 Chapter 33 Chapter 34 Chapter 35 Chapter 36 Chapter 37 Chapter 38 Chapter 39 Chapter 40 Chapter 41 Chapter 42 Chapter 43 Chapter 44 Chapter 45 Chapter 46 Chapter 47 Chapter 48 Chapter 49 Chapter 50 Chapter 51 Chapter 52 Chapter 53 Chapter 54 Chapter 55 Chapter 56 Chapter 57 Chapter 58 Chapter 59 Chapter 60 Chapter 61 Chapter 62 Chapter 63 Chapter 64 Chapter 65 Chapter 66 Chapter 67 Chapter 68 Chapter 69 Chapter 70 Chapter 71 Chapter 72 Chapter 73 Chapter 74 Chapter 75

Tag List: @the-chick-with-the-best-fandom, @does-it-matter129, @dcgoddess

*Trigger warning: cutting, mentions of suicide.*

If It was possible, things in Gotham got worse. Fish and Strange’s other experiments had moved on from pharmacies to Strange’s assistant Ethel Peabody, who had been found mummified. Something was up; Alyssa knew Fish, and she seemed to be getting desperate. The question was, what had made her this way?

Things weren’t looking too good on other fronts either. The media circus had settled down for a long stay, and Valerie Vale was extremely stubborn in her desire to get a juicy article out of the mayor’s office. It was becoming more and more clear that she was new to her industry; still chasing her first big break.

Alyssa never thought she’d say it, but she missed Vivian.

If that wasn’t enough, she couldn’t find Ivy. Granted, she had been getting a tad sloppy at keeping track of her kids, but no one seemed to know where the red head had gotten too. It wasn’t like Ivy to just up and disappear; something was wrong.

Then there was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Perhaps it was her frazzled state that allowed her to miss it for so long.

“What do you mean he’s not here?!” Alyssa shouted at the poor man who’d been made the new warden of Arkham Asylum.

“H-He was unaccounted for after the incident, I-I assumed he’d escaped with the others.”

“And you didn’t think to tell me?!”

“M-Madame Mayor, we’re facing enough bad press as it is --”

“Shut up!” she cut him off, turning her back to him and leaning both hands on his desk. She took a deep breath and tried to steady her heartbeat.

Okay. Okay! It wasn’t that bad, he was still in his state, what could he do?

*******

*Twenty Years Ago*

Alyssa Connors would not know what kids were supposed to be like until age ten. Growing up her life was about two things: staying alive, and denying reality.

She was used to taking her sister to school every day, to lugging a bag of newspapers that weighed more than she did around town, to hiding money from her parents because that was all she knew. It didn’t occur to her that things could be different. That was where denying reality came in. She was aware that there were better people out there than her parents; the Wayne’s for example we’re very well off. They didn’t have to worry about keeping warm and having food on the table.

So on nights when it was quiet, though such nights rarely came to pass, she imagined a life like that. One where all her worries, all her troubles were nonexistent. It was a nice thought, but only a thought.

For as long as Alyssa could remember, it had always been her job to protect people from the big, bad world. There were lots of reasons why the world was bad, but a lot of them tended to be parents. Whether they were overbearing, abusive, neglectful, or just plain not there.

That was where the Tetch family came in. Their dad was one of Kurt Connors’ drinking buddies. They didn’t have a mother.

The younger child, Alice, was just like Jamie. Innocent, naive, unaware of the terror of the world around her. It made Alyssa want to protect her too.

Alice’s older brother was a different story however. Jervis didn’t talk all that much, in fact she could count the number of full conversations they’d had on one hand, and they’d known each other since age four. No, Jervis liked to keep to himself; he was often fiddling in a corner with whatever he had brought home. A watch, a radio; he loved nothing more than to take things apart and see how they worked. He was rather good at it too; he’d made his sister an animatronic rabbit that could hop around the table from all the odds and ends he’d come across.

Alyssa didn’t really give the boy much thought until age six. The night had started off rather average; Mr. Tetch had passed out drunk in the Connors’ living room, consequently leaving his children to spend the night with their friends. Alyssa, having been unable to sleep, had gotten up to see if there was anything edible left in the fridge. She never made it to the kitchen however, noticing the light on in the bathroom as she passed it. Usually she would have ignored it, but the faint sound of tears awoke her motherly instincts and made her open the door.

What she saw would haunt her forever; Jervis sat on the bathmat curled up against the tub a razor blade in hand. The wrist of his opposite hand was bleeding.

“Jervis!” Alyssa’s breath came out in a panicked whisper as she grabbed the hand towel and attempted to stop the bleeding.

The blonde boy yanked his arm away, but Alyssa was quick to grab it back, keeping a tight hold.

“Lemme go.” Jervis’ quiet, barely used voice rasped.

“No.” Alyssa said stubbornly. “Why would you do this to yourself?! What, you don’t get enough scars bein’ slum trash?”

Jervis choked and fresh tears began to pool in his eyes. Alyssa sighed, setting aside her own feelings for the moment. “....You wanna talk about it?” he shook his head, and Alyssa nodded, silently going for the first aid kit that was kept fully stocked. Removing the towel, she got to work dressing his wound properly. Jervis winced when she sprayed him with disinfectant, but stared at her with an strange look as she wrapped a bandage around his arm.

Once she was done, they sat in silence for what seemed like an eternity. Eventually, Alyssa took his hand, making him look up at her. “It’s gonna be alright.” the look he gave her said that he hardly believed her. “Really. You just gotta stay alive.”

******

Alyssa couldn’t sleep. She could barely sit still. Usually when her anxiety and paranoia kept her awake, she channeled her excess energy into painting or her work. Tonight however, she was finding it impossible to focus.

Ugh. She needed a drink.

Making her way to her apartment’s kitchen, she had just finished pouring herself a glass of the strongest chardonnay she had when she turned around to come face-to-face with a man in his mid-twenties with sandy brown hair and leaf green eyes.

Letting out a startled screech, Alyssa dropped her glass and scrambled back into the counter. The glass shattered on impact with the floor, and the alcohol splattered across the floor.

Now sitting with her feet up on the kitchen counter, Alyssa looked back up again to see the man gone. A faint ticking sound remained, and she was very aware of the fact that it was not coming from anything in the apartment.

“Oh god, no....” she said to herself, choking back tears. “Please no, not again....”

******

Alyssa’s world had always circled around her sister Jamie. It was a strange sort of co-dependency that wasn’t like anything else. While Jamie depended on her sister for things like clothes, food, and protection from their neglectful and abusive parents, she lived in a fantasy world. In her head, the four Connors were a happy family, albeit a poor one.

On the flip side, Alyssa depended on her sister to keep her hope alive. She had dreams of her own; a real house in a nice neighborhood, but most days such a thought seemed hopeless. She had been doomed from the moment she was born. Jamie though....Jamie made her feel like there was good in the world. Like there was still a chance things could turn out alright.

Jamie and Alice had their own world, and their siblings lived on the fringes of it. They could admire the simple innocence in a world they knew was unkind, but they could not participate in it.

For the first time, Alyssa found herself approaching Jervis while their sisters were playing.

“Whatcha doin’?”

“Things...” the boy said in a small, barely there voice. He was using a screwdriver on what Alyssa was pretty sure used to be an alarm clock. What his end game was however, she doubted even he knew.

She frowned and studied him a moment, trying to figure out how to get this odd boy to open up to her. “...I’ll race you to the corner store.”

That got him to look up. “What?”

“If you win, I’ll buy you a cookies and cream Hershey bar.” she recognized the look of desire in his eyes; those were his favorite treat. “But if I win, you have to teach me about all this.” she gestured to the array of odds and ends in front of him.

“W-Why would I wanna teach you?” he frowned.

“I dunno.” Alyssa shrugged. “What does that matter? I’m the one who’s going to win.”

His eyes lit up a little at the challenge and his screwdriver suddenly hit the grass. “Hope you’ve got enough money!” he said as he took off.

“Hey!” Alyssa shot to her feet and ran after him.

The corner store was only two blocks from the Connors’ family home. It was a lousy convince store that smelled like chewable tobacco, but the prices were low and the owner took food stamps.

Jervis had gotten there first, but only because he had had a head start, which Alyssa was quick to inform him of as they entered the store. True to her word, she bought the candy bar, which Jervis was eating quickly on their way back before it could melt in the summer heat.

When they returned to the yard where Jamie and Alice were playing, Jervis looked over to his work space with uncertainty.

“Y-You know, if you want.....I can still teach you some stuff....” he said, his gaze firmly on his shoes.

Alyssa beamed. “Awesome!” grabbing his hand she yanked him forward. Her back was to him, so she missed the look in his eyes that would have been very unsettling.

#jerome valeska imagine #jervis tetch imagine #gotham tv show #selina kyle imagine #oswald cobblepot imagine #edward nygma imagine

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hinach168 · 4 years ago

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Low-Carb and Keto Diet Fast Food Menu Choices: How to Eat Successfully at Restaurants

For those who eat low-carb or keto diets, there is almost always something you can eat in every fast food place or restaurant. Plan ahead. Before entering a restaurant, check out their menu and nutrition information online at home or using your smart phone. It's always good to know the safe options before being tempted by menu items you shouldn't have on a low-carb diet.

In order to make it easier to find a quick keto-friendly option, I've compiled a list of several restaurants and fast food places and those items that I've found to be the lowest carb (and most emotionally satisfying) choices. These are not all perfect options, but when you're stuck with no other choices due to time or location constraints, they'll do in a pinch.

It's a huge help that fast-food places are required to post nutritional content. It gets easier to follow the keto plan every day. The carb count I'm listing is approximate and is NET grams.

In general, there is usually some salad option anywhere you are. At Burger joints, just remove the bun, and many places offer lettuce wraps instead. Chicken shouldn't have breading.

As a side note, it helps to have a knife and fork handy in your car or purse. Big, juicy burgers in tiny pieces of lettuce end up on the table - or in your lap. Small, flimsy fastfood plasticware also makes for difficult eating. Pull out your own sturdy utensils and enjoy!

Now for the food choices... here are some pretty obvious general rules to follow:

Skip the bun or wrap

Skip the pasta, potato, or rice

Salads - no croutons. Stick with low sugar dressing options - Caesar, Blue Cheese, Ranch, Chipotle. Look at the name which may give you a clue, things like "honey" in the honey dijon or "sweet" in the dressing name - these are usually not a good choice. Check the ingredient for items that are higher in carb content.

Chicken - Choose grilled or sauteed. Stay away from any chicken that is breaded.

McDonald's - opt for any burger (zero g) or keto fried chicken (2 g) without the bun and topped with cheese, mayo, mustard, onions, etc. No ketchup. Add a side salad (3g). The Caesar salad with grilled chicken or the bacon ranch salad with grilled chicken are 9g.

Burger King - same burger info as McDonald's: burger (zero g) without the bun and topped with cheese, mayo, mustard, onions, etc. No ketchup. The tendergrill chicken sandwich without the bun is 3g. BEWARE - you might think the veggie burger is low, but it is 19g of carbs, so that's about a full day of carbs on keto. Add a side salad (3g). The tendergrill chicken garden salad is 8g without dressing or croutons. The tendercrisp chicken salad is not an option. Do not attempt.

BONUS - dessert!?! - the fresh apple fries are not fried and are 5g net carbs WITHOUT caramel sauce.

Subway - Probably should skip Subway if you can. The buns and wraps are all high in carbs. I guess you could just have them throw the ingredients in a wrapper sans bun, but that doesn't sound appealing. I have no info on what the carb count would be for each bunless sub, but you can probably figure it out - chicken or pepperoni is fine, but is "sweet onion" chicken okay? No idea. Stick to the salads, but realize you'll only get iceberg lettuce (4g).

Carl's Junior and Hardees - This chain offers "lettuce wraps" - your burger wrapped in a large piece of lettuce for easy low carb eating. (As I've said, I tried it and don't love it. I like to carry my own fork instead.) Bunless options - Six dollar burger (7g), 1/2 thick-burger (5g), charbroiled chicken club sandwich (7g/10g at Hardees). Grilled chicken salad without croutons is 10g. Side salad is 3g.

Jimmy John's - The unwich - a sandwich wrapped in lettuce - fits the bill here. Meats are fine, just make sure the ingredients are not carb-rich.

Wendy's - Again, you can get your burger in a lettuce wrap or a box. Any burger with toppings. Mayo has corn syrup, and is 1g. The chicken grill fillet is 1 g. It can be ordered in the chicken club sandwich or the ultimate chicken grill sandwich. Best salads: chicken caesar (7g), blt chicken salad with grilled chicken. Side salads aer 6g or 2g for Caesar.

Pizza Hut and other pizza places - It is possible to get used to eating pizza with no crust. You need to eat twice as much, but if there's a party or dinner out that you can't avoid at a pizza place, just slide the cheesy toppings off and eat the big messy pile of cheese and toppings. A side salad is a nice addition. Otherwise, just opt for making pizza at home with a low-carb crust.

Mongolian Barbecue - YES! Load up your bowl with chicken, shrimp, onion slices, and mushrooms, then top with the Asian black bean sauce. I know beans have carbs, but this sauce label says 1 gram of carbs per ounce (each sauce is plainly labeled). Add a bit of garlic and wait for the griller to do his work. It goes without saying that you skip the appetizers, tortillas, and rice. Ask the wait staff not to bring them to the table.

Italian Restaurants - These take a little cunning, but they can be conquered! Ideas: how about chicken Marsala in an Italian place? Make sure it doesn't come with pasta. Substitute broccoli or some other keto-friendly side dish - or a big salad. Chicken piccata is also a possibility.

Mexican and Chinese restaurants are the most difficult, because any low carb option is not the reason to go to the restaurant in the first place. At a Mexican restaurant, I tend to get a large burrito with no beans and spread the soft tortilla out like a plate. Eat the inner ingredients and toss the tortilla.

If you MUST go to a Chinese buffet (I attended a funeral dinner at one), you can find options, but they probably aren't going to be your favorite General Tso's. How about the salad bar choices? eggs? the insides of eggrolls, and I even ate the insides only of crab rangoons. Unfortunately, these ideas leave quite a pile of discarded shells and deep fried exterior pieces on your plate and makes it look like you really waste food.

Wings anywhere - Standard buffalo sauce is usually OK as well as garlic Parmesan

Convenience stores can be a good option, too! 7-11 has packs of hard boiled eggs, cheese slabs, slim jims, almonds, and pork rinds. Pork rinds come in a barbecue flavor and they're ZERO carbs.

Remember, whatever you choose, hold the bread, potatoes, rice, noodles, fries, and tortillas. And watch out for the possibility of corn starch, bread crumbs, and other fillers. With proper planning and a good attitude, you can find healthy keto and low-carb options when dining out, and stick to your successful keto diet plan.

#keto diet #keto #chicken #fried chicken #lunch bowls #recipes #keto chicken #low card meal plan #keto fried chicken

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unifiedsocialblog · 6 years ago

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How to Use Facebook Audience Insights to Improve Targeting

Facebook Audience Insights gives you a ton of data on your target demographic, which will help you laser-target your ads. And better targeting means you only pay to reach the people who are most likely to become customers.

It can also help you tailor your posts to ensure you’re providing the right content, in the right voice, and at the right time to best connect with the followers you already have.

You can get high-level information about your followers like age and gender. Or you can get more detailed insights like job titles, hobbies, and relationship status.

Here’s how it works.

Bonus: Download a free guide that teaches you how to turn Facebook traffic into sales in four simple steps using Hootsuite.

How to use Facebook Audience Insights in 5 simple steps

You can find Facebook Audience Insights within Facebook Ads Manager. That means only business users can access Audience Insights.

If you don’t have your business set up on Facebook yet, you’ll need to create your business page before you dive into these steps.

Step 1. Select the audience you want insights for

Open the Audience Insights dashboard.

If you have more than one ad account, choose which one you’d like insights for from the drop-down menu on the top right.

Select whether you want insights about the overall Facebook audience, or only about people already connected to your page. If you have created any custom audiences for your Facebook ad campaigns, you’ll also see the option to get insights about those users.

Since this guide is all about using Facebook Audience Insights to better target your ads, we’ll stick with the first option—everyone on Facebook—and look at the insights you can gain to focus your Facebook advertising strategy.

Here’s how to choose which audience to analyze:

Everyone on Facebook: Choose this option if you are looking for information about new potential fans and customers you could reach with your Facebook ads.

People connected to your Page: Choose this option if you want to learn more about your existing audience, so you can better tailor your content to them.

A custom audience: Choose this option if you’d like to learn more about a custom audience, like your existing customers or email subscribers, so you can uncover ways to better connect with them using Facebook.

Step 2. Build your target audience demographics (and learn as you go)

Now it’s time to start using the information available within Facebook Audience Insights to build a target market for your ads.

The Audience Insights dashboard has two sections. In the left column, you select the audience characteristics to target. The right side of the page shows graphs and charts related to your audience, including how it compares to the overall audience of everyone using Facebook.

Every time you make a selection to refine your audience, the graphs and percentages on the right side of the screen update automatically, so you can always see how your choices impact the audience available.

Location

The location defaults to the United States, but this may not be the appropriate option for your business. You can choose to include or exclude any country, region, or city.

If you’re managing a local business with a bricks-and-mortar location, you’ll likely want to choose only your city, or your state.

If you’re selling online services, you may want to include all countries worldwide.

If you sell a physical product, you should stick to the countries for which shipping is available and not cost-prohibitive.

Age and Gender

Facebook Audience Insights are only available for users who are 18+, so you won’t be able to target anyone younger than that. Otherwise, you can use these options to narrow your targeting based on your existing customer research and audience personas.

If you don’t know which ages or genders you want to target, go ahead and leave these as the defaults for now. You’ll get some valuable information about the gender and age makeup of your audience when you start refining your audience by interest.

Interests

This is where it gets interesting. Click on the Interests box and a drop-down menu appears.

Click on the items in the drop-down menu and you can refine your options even further. You should get as detailed as you can here based on information you know about your existing customers.

You can learn a lot just by watching what happens with the graphs as you refine your choices:

For example, the split of all U.S. users on Facebook is 54 percent women to 46 percent men.

Add “Food and drink” as an interest and that changes to 62 percent women and 38 percent men.

Narrow it to “Restaurants” and it jumps to 69 percent women and 31 percent men.

Narrow it further to “Coffeehouses” and the audience is 71 percent women and 29 percent men.

If you’re marketing a local coffeehouse, rather than a chain, you’ll also want to narrow your audience geographically. For example, let’s say your coffeehouse is in Portland, Oregon.

The percentage of genders changes again—it’s less skewed towards women. In Portland, women represent 65 percent of your coffeehouse audience, rather than 71 percent across the whole country.

If you’re marketing a Portland coffeehouse on Facebook, you’ve just learned some incredibly valuable data about who your ads should be speaking to. And that’s just looking at gender. The graphs also show statistics for age, relationship status, education level, and job title.

For instance, the Portland charts show that there are far more people between the ages of 25 to 34 interested in coffeehouses in Portland than there are nationwide.

But you’re not done yet.

Advanced

Under the Advanced drop-down menu, you can narrow your audience by relationship status, education level, job title and office type, and cultural group. You can choose to target parents, or even parents of a specific age of child. You can also target using life events like people who have recently moved or started a new job.

For your coffeehouse business, if you choose to target only parents, the nationwide audience jumps to 77 percent women and 23 percent men. Not surprisingly, the age and relationship status graphs change dramatically as well.

So, for example, if you wanted to run an ad promoting your coffeehouse as a great place for parents to bring their kids, the graphs show that you would hit more of your target audience by limiting your ad to Facebook users aged 35 and over.

Once you’ve finished narrowing down your audience, click Save and give your audience a relevant name.

Remember that the more detailed you get in your targeting, the smaller your audience will be. But more detailed targeting also tends to make for a more responsive list, increasing your return on investment for Facebook ads.

Get as detailed as you can, but be sure to test your new audience against your existing Facebook campaigns to see how the conversion rates compare and which delivers the best ROI.

Bonus: Download a free guide that teaches you how to turn Facebook traffic into sales in four simple steps using Hootsuite.

Get the free guide right now!

Step 3. Discover what your audience already likes

Now that you’ve selected your demographics and learned some key intel about the makeup of your target audience, click over to the Page Likes tab.

Here, you can learn more about what people in your selected audience already like on Facebook.

Top Categories

In the Top Categories section, you can learn about your audience’s general interests. Not surprisingly, coffeehouse fans are interested in the food & beverage category, as well as specialty grocery stores.

Surprisingly, they are also interested in travel agencies. That indicates coffeehouse fans are also keen to travel.

You can use this information to inspire ideas to test out in your organic Facebook marketing strategy, as well as your ads. For example, you could incorporate a little wanderlust imagery into your next post. Or you could run a contest where followers share their best coffee-drinking experiences from their travels.

Page Likes

Here’s the really juicy information. In this section, you can see which existing Facebook pages are already connecting with people in your audience.

You’ll notice that these pages are ranked by both relevance and affinity. What’s the difference? Here’s how Facebook defines both terms:

Affinity: How likely your audience is to like a given Page compared to everyone on Facebook.

Relevance: The pages that are most likely to be relevant to your audience based on affinity, Page size, and the number of people in your audience who already like that Page.

You should click through to all of these pages to do some competitive research about what these businesses are doing, and get ideas about how you can replicate their success.

But more importantly, you should make a list of these pages in a document or spreadsheet, because you’re about to pop back into the audience creation column to gain some valuable data.

Under the Interests drop-down, you can type directly into the selection box. Here, enter the names of the Pages from the Page Likes tab. Not all of them will come up as interests, but for those that do, you can access demographic information about their audience.

Since you get the best return on investment by targeting your ads as narrowly as possible, use the information you uncover about your competitor’s fans to further narrow your own targeting.

Click Open in the top navigation bar to open your existing audience and make changes based on what you learn from your competitor research.

When you have entered the additional details, click More in the top navigation.

Then choose Save As to create a modified version of your audience while preserving the original.

Test your newly refined audience against your original selection to see which delivers the best ROI.

Keep in mind that you can’t change the audience for an active ad campaign.

Step 4. Uncover location, language, and device details

Location and language

Now click over to the Location tab.

If you’re running a bricks-and-mortar business, you already know what geographic region you want to target. But if you’re selling an online product or service, your potential geographic target is worldwide.

In the Location tab, you can see where most of your potential fans live, and what languages they speak.

For example, let’s say you sell Batman action figures. In the right column, clear all location selections and enter Batman action figures as an interest. You’ll see that the top market is the United States (52 percent), but you may be surprised to see that the second-largest market is Tunisia (13 percent).

If you can ship to Tunisia, or you offer digital products that might appeal to a Tunisian audience, that’s an untapped market for you to explore.

You can also see what languages are most common among your audience. While English is the most common language among Batman action figure fans (80 percent), 13 percent of the potential market speaks French. It may be worth creating French ads, which you can choose to show only to French-speaking Facebook users.

Device

Click on the Activity tab next to the Location tab, then scroll down to Device Users.

Here, you can see which devices your selected audience uses to access Facebook, which can be helpful information for ad design.

For example, among our Batman action figure fans, Android devices are hugely popular: 82 percent of this audience uses Android as their primary way of accessing Facebook.

But among our Portland-based coffeehouse fans, iPhones are much more popular: 54 percent of them use an iPhone or iPod as their primary device for accessing Facebook, and only 33 percent use Android.

Step 5. Target your audience with an ad

As long as the audience you’ve built in Audience Insights is more than 1,000 people, you can use it as the target audience for an ad.

Click Open in the top navigation bar, then select the audience you want to target. Then, click the green Create Ad button to place an ad targeted to this specific group.

For a step-by-step walkthrough on how to actually create the ad, check out our post on how to advertise on Facebook.

Ad Manager will automatically populate the targeting fields with the options you pre-selected using Audience Insights.

Be sure to track the performance of each targeted ad campaign you run, and test it against your usual Facebook ROI.

As you place increasingly more targeted ads, you may see the overall number of conversions drop off. But keep in mind this is because you’re showing your ad to a smaller audience. Your ROI may climb even if your conversions decrease.

Testing and tracking will allow you to find the sweet spot that maximizes ROI while bringing in the number of conversions you need to meet your social media goals.

Save time and manage your Facebook presence alongside your other social media channels with Hootsuite. Get to know your audience, track your performance, boost your best content, and convert fans into customers. Try it free today.

Get Started

The post How to Use Facebook Audience Insights to Improve Targeting appeared first on Hootsuite Social Media Management.

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thewiseexplorer · 7 years ago

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Hello everyone! I am so happy to share all about my travels and experiences as an American living in a developing country. My name is Emily Mick and I am a special education teacher living and working in the Dominican Republic! I moved here about 8 months ago to pursue my never-ending lust for adventure.

Growing up, my parents made it a point to take family vacations once a year. We went everywhere from the Black Hills of South Dakota to the beautiful beaches of Maui and San Juan, Puerto Rico. I remember looking forward to our family adventures and always anxiously awaiting the next one.

I went to college at Iowa State University to become a special education teacher. During the summers, I was fortunate enough to work for Camp Adventure Youth Services. Camp Adventure is a program that trains summer camp counselors and places them at military bases all around the world to provide programming for the children living on base. I worked in Pearl Harbor, Hawaii, Ansbach, Germany, and Vicenza, Italy. After those experiences, I just knew I would never stop wandering.

I really appreciate that you wanted to tell us a little about the Dominican Republic, a place I have never been to and which I am eager to learn more about. How did you decide on this location?

Once I decided on moving to another country, my final decision came down to my craving for something new. I had never been to a developing country before and I had just barely dipped my toes in the Caribbean. The idea of living on a tropical island, where I could experience warm weather, a new culture, new foods, and a somewhat new language sounded amazing. And the fact that I was able to continue working as a special education teacher was simply too good to be true!

How did you get there? Where did you stay? How is the transportation there? Did you use any agency, activity package, a guide or you did it all yourself?

My family lives in Chicago so I flew into Santo Domingo from the O’hare airport. When flying here, you will almost always have a layover in Miami. The trip was only around 5 hours total. Not bad for an international flight! Because I actually work here, I live in an apartment in the city. However, when I travel around the island I always rent an Airbnb. There are so many options and you can save so much money!

One thing I am extremely thankful for is Uber. I use Uber all the time in the city! There is also a subway that runs a route up and down the main interstate in the city as well as buses, public cars, and motoconchos which are public motorcycle taxis. If you need to get somewhere, there are many options for transportation. When we are traveling longer distances, we always rent a car.

In terms of activities and tour guides, I have booked travel excursions through various online companies for things like snorkeling and waterfall hikes. However, when I first arrived, I did everything on my own. I used my coworkers at school as tour guides and just learned how to manage from there.

Could you explore on your own? Was there a language barrier?

It is definitely possible to explore the country on your own. At first, I was a little nervous walking around by myself. I have never felt unsafe but I get lost so easily and my Spanish was pretty rocky. I quickly learned that the people are super friendly and do a great job attempting to speak Spanglish with me.

Coming here, I was way more confident in my Spanish skills that I should have been. Dominican Spanish is very different than the Spanish you will hear in Mexico or Spain. They speak quickly and tend to drop the endings of words. I have gotten used to the Spanish but there was most definitely a language barrier when I first arrived. But like I said, lots of people are happy to help and very willing to take time and try to understand you. So don’t be afraid to sound silly! You would be surprised how many people want to try and learn English here.

If you visit the North side of the island (my favorite!) you will meet many Europeans who have moved here to live a more peaceful and relaxed way of life. They love showing us around and introducing us to the best local cafes. Hostels and share houses are a great way to travel alone because they are really cheap and often have other young travellers who are looking to experience the same adventures as you!

I have made some close friends over the last 8 months so I typically travel with 3 to 5 other people. Again, I am a teacher and do not make very much money so I like to cut costs in every way possible.

What are some of the best spots to visit in the Dominican Republic?

My favorite spot for a relaxing getaway is Las Terrenas. It is an adorable little beach town up North, right along the coast. It has great cafes for breakfast and lunch as well as really good seafood restaurants for dinner. There are some fun beach-side bars that play music and have good happy hour deals. This is where many Europeans live. I like it because you get a good taste of the Dominican culture through food and music but then you also get great Italian influence. Plus many of the Europeans have Airbnbs for low prices. I highly recommend Las Terrenas!

Also on the North side of the island is Cabarete and Puerto Plata. They are not far from each other but both offer great beach views and fun activities as well!

Another one of my favorite places is Jarabacoa. This is a town about an hour and a half north of the city in the mountains. I was actually surprised to learn that there were mountain ranges on the island. I had no idea! This is not your typical idea of a tropical vacation. But it is definitely worth visiting! The drive alone is absolutely beautiful. Once you arrive to the town, you will find authentic Dominican colmados and comedors. These are road-side restaurants that serve local cuisine. They are all over the city as well. Colmados are the perfect place to sit back, relax, and enjoy an ice cold Presidente beer after hiking in the mountains. But my favorite thing about Jarabacoa are the amazing sunsets. There is really nothing better than watching the sunset over the mountains.

You mentioned Snorkelling and waterfall chasing before. What are some of the activities you enjoyed there?

Of course, the first thing that comes to mind is the beach. Spending the weekends relaxing on the beach is a perfect way to wind down after a long work week. But I have also loved snorkeling, boating, and kitesurfing. I took a kitesurfing course in Cabarete. It was so much fun to learn about a sport that I had never experienced before. I can’t say I was very good at it but I am looking forward to continuing to learn!

If you are spending time in Santo Domingo, you have to visit Los Tres Ojos! It is a protected area of caves and natural pools that are located underneath the city. This is probably the most unique park I have ever been to!

If you come in the winter, you might have the opportunity to experience Carnaval. This is a Dominican festival outside the city where you can find the streets lined with food and drink vendors, music, and dancing. There is a huge parade with insanely colorful and elaborate costumes. This was one of my favorite true Dominican experiences so far.

With all of those activities being amazing adventures, my favorite so far has been chasing waterfalls. There are many waterfalls on the island, even the tallest waterfall in the Caribbean! The majority of the waterfalls are up north near Cabarete and Puerto Plata. There is even an excursion called “27 Waterfalls” where you can hike to, jump from, and swim under all the waterfalls you can imagine.

What did you learn from the locals, their culture, and lifestyle?

I think the people are the most fascinating part of the country. There is so much poverty yet everyone always seems happy. They are always willing to work together to support friends, family, and even total strangers like me! It is really something to admire.

Dominican culture is very relaxed yet hectic at the same time. I must admit, getting used to “island time” was a little difficult at first. Because of the fact that this is a developing country, some restaurants and stores lack online information. It has been a challenge getting used to the strange hours and siestas that many restaurants take. I am very thankful that the people are so friendly because I often find myself asking questions about when and where to eat. You just have to accept the fact that if you choose to eat out at a restaurant, your food may take longer than in the States because they really like the social aspect of sitting and enjoying time with friends. The food comes second to good conversation.

Everyone really takes their time and fully live up to the slow-paced lifestyle. You will often see people just hanging out on street corners, sipping coffee and chatting with friends. There isn’t much hustle or bustle throughout the work week, except for on the interstate. The roads can get pretty crazy during rush hour due to the high volume of people that live in the city. Outside the city, the roads are just fine.

Did you enjoy the cuisine there? Which were your favorite dishes?

I love Dominican food! It is really simple and not very spicy. Anyone will be able to find something to enjoy here. The absolute best part about living on a tropical island is all the fresh fruit. You can purchase fresh fruit for next to no money on every street corner. My favorite fruit to eat here is chinola. It is passionfruit and they use it in everything from juice to ice cream. Chinola is delicious!

Some of my favorite meals to order at restaurants include chicken and rice or Caribbean fish. Fried chicken is very popular here and Dominicans can make a mean fried chicken. It is seasoned perfectly and flash fried so that the skin is really crispy but the inside is still juicy. It is always served with rice and fried plantains called tostones. Caribbean fish is cooked similarly to the chicken. It is flash fried whole and topped with pickled peppers. It is the best way to eat fish!

Any tips for future visitors?

I would definitely recommend doing some research prior to arriving. Like I said, the internet can be a little tricky to navigate and many small towns can have spotty cell service. Make sure you know where your accommodations are and have a general idea of where you want to go so you don’t let loose. It wouldn’t hurt to learn a little Spanish too.

Along with that, I can’t say enough good things about the Airbnb rentals here. There are so many amazing homes and apartments to stay in that will save you money. The people who own the buildings are always willing to help make your stay as perfect as can be.

Finally, take advantage of the size of the island! If you are here for a week or more, you will have plenty of time to explore more than one town. My favorite places are up North. Spend a few days in each town, then drive an hour or two to the next. You will get the full Dominican experience as well as the opportunity to do more activities.

Was is your next adventure? Anything planned yet?

Living in the Caribbean opens doors to many other islands. Of course, I will continue to explore all corners of the Dominican Republic. But, I am also planning on traveling to Cuba in the near future. I would love to visit Havana and experience the culture and lifestyle there.

How can we see more about you and your trips? what is your website or/and social media?

One of the best decisions I have made since moving here is starting my own blog! You can read all about my adventures as well as some travel tips and tricks at Que lo que. I try to post once or twice a month. I would love to connect with other travel bloggers!

You can also follow me on Instagram at emily__cecilia. I post most of my pictures there!

A special thanks to Emily for sharing her experience in the Dominican Republic with all of us! This was very rewarding and your stories, very entertaining and enlightening.

@Explorers, Don’t miss out her page!

If you want to see more post about the Caribbean, please click below:

Cartagena, Colombia – Here.

Eco-friendly Resorts – Here.

The beauty of Haiti – Here.

Cuba (corner to corner) – Here.

Jamaican Guineps – Here.

Be wise!

Get to know the Dominican Republic – Collab with ”Que Lo Que”. Hello everyone! I am so happy to share all about my travels and experiences as an American living in a developing country.

#adventure #caribbean #dominican republic #festivals #island #nature #photography #travel #traveling #travelling #trip #waterfalls

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touristguidebuzz · 7 years ago

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Allegiant Air Seeks to Convert Drivers to Flyers — Airline Innovation Report

One of Allegiant Air's new Airbus A320s takes off. These airplanes are far more efficient than the MD-80s they replace. Allegiant Air

Skift Take: Few airlines share as much information as Allegiant Air. You don't often hear an airline executive (good-naturedly) criticize an aircraft in its fleet — even when it's warranted.

— Brian Sumers

The Skift Airline Innovation Report is our weekly newsletter focused on the business of airline innovation. We will look closely at the technological, financial, and design trends at airlines and airports that are driving the next-gen aviation industry.

We provide insights on need-to-know developments in passenger experience, ancillary services, revenue management, loyalty, technology, marketing, airport innovation, the competitive landscape, startups, and changing passenger behavior. The newsletter, sent on Wednesdays, is written and curated by me. You can find previous issues of the newsletter here.

When considering new routes, U.S. discount airline Allegiant Air has a simple strategy: It flies where other airlines do not.

It’s a profitable approach. But it requires the airline’s network planners — the people who pick new routes — to be creative. Allegiant is growing, but its planners can’t rely on obvious routes, like New York to Chicago, or L.A. to Seattle. Usually, they must build markets where none exist.

That’s how, about five years ago, Allegiant created a base in Punta Gorda, a Western Florida airport with no commercial service. Today, Allegiant flies from Punta Gorda — it’s between Fort Myers and Sarasota — to more than 30 smaller- and medium-sized cities, including St. Cloud, Minnesota; Knoxville, Tennessee; Springfield, Illinois; and Des Moines, Iowa. Allegiant is so bullish on the service it’s building a resort hotel and condominium property nearby so it can sell vacation packages to passengers.

As an air market, Punta Gorda was “discovered” by Lukas Johnson, the airline’s senior vice president for commercial. Now, Allegiant is building a base in Florida’s panhandle, expanding at Destin-Fort Walton Beach Airport. Other carriers fly there, but focus more on shuttling business traffic to their hubs.

Expanding in Destin, which Johnson calls a “huge success,” is a project led by Kristen Shilling-Gonzalez, Allegiant’s director of planning.

For a story published Monday, I spoke to Shilling-Gonzalez about what she’s looking for in new routes, and how Allegiant decides which aircraft to use. She was candid, explaining why Allegiant sometimes cancels routes before they start, telling us why the airline can’t use its MD-80s in the Las Vegas summer heat, and revealing that travelers who tend to drive between two points are a target market. She also gave us the scoop on why Allegiant doesn’t like coast-to-coast routes, and when the airline will fly abroad.

What do you think of Allegiant’s unusual approach? Do you think Allegiant is smart to stick with its niche? Or should it compete with big airlines more often?

Let me know by emailing me at [email protected]. Or find me on Twitter.

— Brian Sumers, Airline Business Reporter

Stories of the Week

Should More Airlines Spin Off Their Loyalty Programs? If you’ve listened to an airline earnings call recently, you probably know Joseph DeNardi. He’s an analyst with Stifel obsessed with getting executives to share information about loyalty programs. They often don’t answer him, but that hasn’t stopped him. Now, he’s pushing a theory that more airlines should sell off their frequent flyer programs. Why? “There is far too much value trapped within airline loyalty programs,” he said.

Japan Air Invests $10 Million in Concorde Successor: This news, which broke Tuesday, is surprising for two reasons. One, Japan Airlines is notoriously conservative. And two, the airline won’t gain much from early generations of this supersonic aircraft. Boom’s jets are expected to need a fuel stop to fly to Japan from the continental United States, including from the West Coast. After accounting for the stop, passengers don’t save that much time. Then again, $10 million isn’t much money. Related: Read my August interview with Boom founder and CEO Blake Scholl.

Allegiant Air Agonizes Over New Routes for Months or Even Years: Allegiant can’t fly its MD-80s from some cities at certain times of the year. It sometimes cancels routes before they launch. And it’s not interested in coast-to-coast routes. Learn why in this discussion with the airline’s director of planning, part of my Airline Insiders series.

American Airlines Solves Its Holiday Pilot Problem and Will Not Cancel Any Flights: Will passengers remember this in a month? For two days, this was huge news, with reporters wondering if American would ruin Christmas for tens of thousands of travelers. That never seemed likely — American was always willing to atone for its mistake by paying its pilots extra money — but representatives from the carrier’s pilots union seemed to enjoy putting American on the spot. That was probably a successful strategy, because it forced American to increase its offer. But it made for a mess of a week.

American Airlines Cracks Down on Smart Luggage With Built-In Batteries: This announcement makes sense. How many passengers do you suppose have mistakenly left batteries in these bags when gate-checking them at the last minute? But airline employees are already harried, so it’s not clear how carefully they will enforce these new rules. My guess is some passengers still will forget to remove the batteries.

NAACP Won’t Yet Lift Its American Airlines Travel Advisory: I’ve covered American for awhile, and I’ve seen nothing indicating the problems identified by the NAACP come from the top. That said, it’s a good thing American is training its employees about implicit bias. More companies should do it.

Air France-KLM Starts Operating Hipster-Focused Joon: Air France’s lower-cost brand, Joon, is already flying. Here’s a prediction: Joon might do OK, but over time, the airline could soften some of its overt pandering to travelers younger than 35. For now, the airline advertises itself as a “fashion brand, a rooftop bar, an entertainment channel,” which is ridiculous. It’s an airline. Related: Read my October interview with Air France-KLM CEO Jean-Marc Janaillac, in which we discuss why Joon is necessary.

No, Delta Didn’t Really Go ‘Cancel-Free’ Over the Thanksgiving Holiday: On Monday, Delta said it hadn’t canceled a Delta or Delta Connection flight in November. That may have been technically accurate, but The Points Guy discovered Delta left out an important detail. Its reporter found SkyWest canceled a Delta Connection flight on Nov. 26, and while Delta operated a replacement, it didn’t depart until 18 hours later. By that time, most of the original Skywest passengers had probably reached their destination. Officially, that might not have ended Delta’s perfect streak, but for passengers, it was essentially a canceled flight.

Leahy Reflects on 33 Years at Airbus: When John Leahy, an American, joined Airbus in 1985, the European company had never sold a plane to a U.S. airline. It didn’t have much hope, either. But Leahy, who is retiring as Airbus chief operating officer-commercial, helped changed that, and now just about every U.S. airline — Southwest is an exception — flies Airbus planes. The early years weren’t easy, he told Leeham News and Comment. “If you bought Boeing, and it didn’t turn out to be right, well, it was Boeing’s fault,” he said. “If you went out on a limb and bought this crazy European airplane and it didn’t turn out, people’s careers would be over at that point in time.”

News and Notes

IATA, the global international airline trade group, predicts total global airline profits will hit $38.4 billion in 2018, about $4 million more than it forecasts for 2017. …This summer, United Airlines will fly high-density Boeing 777-200s — with 28 seats in business and 334 in economy — from Newark to Dublin, Madrid, and Barcelona. It had only been flying these 777s on domestic routes, though they fly long segments, including Guam-Honolulu. … Spirit Airlines announced it had a 90.4 percent on-time arrival rate for November. Operational reliability has been a focus for newish CEO Bob Fornaro. … Iberia Airlines will resume flying from Madrid to San Juan, Puerto Rico in March, starting with three weekly flights and increasing to five for the summer peak season. … Hawaiian Airlines is starting to schedule its new Airbus A321neos, a fuel-efficient aircraft that will allow it to enter new markets that would not have been profitable before. This week, it announced San Diego-Maui. … Patrick Quayle, United’s vice president for international planning, makes the Crain’s Chicago Business 40-under-40 list. Quayle’s on an ultra-long-haul kick, having announced Los Angeles-Singapore and Houston-Sydney in recent months.

Radio Gig: I’m the airline analyst for “The Opening Bell,” a morning radio program on WGN in Chicago. Last week, we discussed airline food, American’s pilot drama, and new improvements for United’s Wi-Fi system.

Skift Airline Business Reporter Brian Sumers [[email protected]] curates the Skift Airline Innovation Report. Skift emails the newsletter every Wednesday. Have a story idea? Or a juicy news tip? Want to share a memo? Send me an email or tweet me.

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rollinbrigittenv8 · 7 years ago

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Allegiant Air Seeks to Convert Drivers to Flyers — Airline Innovation Report

One of Allegiant Air's new Airbus A320s takes off. These airplanes are far more efficient than the MD-80s they replace. Allegiant Air

Skift Take: Few airlines share as much information as Allegiant Air. You don't often hear an airline executive (good-naturedly) criticize an aircraft in its fleet — even when it's warranted.

— Brian Sumers

When considering new routes, U.S. discount airline Allegiant Air has a simple strategy: It flies where other airlines do not.

Expanding in Destin, which Johnson calls a “huge success,” is a project led by Kristen Shilling-Gonzalez, Allegiant’s director of planning.

What do you think of Allegiant’s unusual approach? Do you think Allegiant is smart to stick with its niche? Or should it compete with big airlines more often?

Let me know by emailing me at [email protected]. Or find me on Twitter.

— Brian Sumers, Airline Business Reporter

Stories of the Week

News and Notes

Subscribe to the Skift Airline Innovation Report

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