#because there are no free seats at this party rn and i am in hell | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

nervousgardenerkid · 2 years ago

Note

no thoughts, head empty, just being eddie’s sibling and convincing steve to come play a oneshot with hellfire (a oneshot is basically an entire ‘campaign’ that happens in one session compared to a campaign which takes multiple sessions) as a way to have eddie and steve bond in a more relaxed environment where overprotective older brother eddie is in his environment and therefore should theoretically be more chill

but no. eddie is doing whatever he can to make steve’s character suffer and/or die while steve is just flirting with you under the guise of playing his character (he’d probably play as bard because he has those vibes, probably a half elf bard or a human)

Brotherly duties

a/n: this is quite literally the shortest thing i've ever wrote and it's bc i have no clue how d&d works😭i lowkey have a deep hatred for it cause my toxic ex would always play it and he was just a piece of shit so now i hate everything that reminds me of him LMAO lowercase everything is intended i'm too faded to correct things rn i hope i did this to your liking🥺credit to the gif owner! <3

steve had no clue how you managed to drag him to your d&d....thing. he cringes internally when he realizes that he can't even remember what you called it. he remembers the laugh robin let out once you skipped away from him with a smile on your face.

"dude, you don't know a damn thing about d&d!"

"don't you think i know that?! what the hell am i gonna do?"

and now here he is. sitting in a circle with the hell fire club lost as hell as everyone is chanting at steve. he breaks free from his thoughts when eddie throws a die at him.

"you're holding up the oneshot!" he shouts at steve.

what the hell is a one shot?! steve thinks to himself. his heart skips a beat when he hears you giggle at your brother bullying him. steve would gladly take a thousands dice to the face if it meant he could hear your giggle again.

steve grabs the dice that are sitting in front of him staring at them with wide eyes.

"i thought dice only had six sides?"

the party groans and dustin gently bangs his head on the table.

"just roll it!" eddie shouts.

steve tosses the dice back into the table looking back at eddie silently asking him what the fuck do these numbers mean.

eddie let's out a hum and smiles when an idea pops into his head.

"steve's character is dead!"

"what?!" you shout while standing up from your seat.

eddie nods his head. "yup, he's dead. may we all mourn his corpse, i ask for a moment of silence."

a literal second passes and eddie claps his hands together. "moment of silence is over! your turn mike."

"hold on now." steve says while sitting up. "you guys literally get to do whatever you want in this game. lucas literally rolled so that he could push gareth's character down!"

"and i will do it again." lucas said while glaring at gareth.

"let me roll again! if i land on a seven then..." steve decided now was the time. well, not really, but he figured he'd really get under eddie's skin and ask you out on a date in front of your very protective older brother.

"i get to take y/n on a date."

eddie slams his hands on the table and stands from his throne.

"YOU DARE TO DATE MY LITTLE, BABY SISTER."

"dude, you got me beat by like two months." you mumbled while sitting back down in your seat.

steve stares at eddie with wide eyes and opens his mouth only to close it quickly.

"um, yeah? you heard what i said right?"

eddie stands up straight and crosses his arms over his chest.

"absolutely..."

you smile at eddie. "really?!"

"NOT! over my dead body you're dating her!"

you stand back up and lean over the table. "that can be arranged."

bickering starts between the three of you and the rest of the part watches like it's free entertainment, except for dustin.

"i have to deal with these bone heads on a daily basis. all i wanted to do was play d&d...why me?"

"OKAY FINE!" eddie shouts. he points at the both of you and begins to smirk.

"he can take you out IF he defeats vecna."

you gasp and place your hands over your mouth as you narrow your eyes at your older brother.

"you monster."

eddie begins to laugh evilly knowing steve would never defeat him, not even the party has done that yet!

"who the hell is vecna?"

everyone groans, including you. steve rubs his finger tips along his temples trying to play catch up.

"i thought the bad guy was that werewolf dude-"

"he's a VAMPIRE!" eddie shouts.

steve looks at him and shakes his head.

"same thing."

eddie let's out a scoff. "same thing?! THIS IS WHO YOU WANT TO DATE?!"

"YES AND YOU CAN'T CHANGE MY MIND EDDIE!"

"is vecna the mind thingy? that's something different isn't it?"

eddie stares between you two and narrows his eyes at steve.

"steve. let's take a walk."

steve starts to follow eddie out of the theatre room when you grab his hand and hand him a bag of cheetos.

"take this with you, if he gets aggressive just hold it up like you would feed a rabid dog some steak."

you give him a small kiss on the cheek and push him out room. eddie is stood next to his van smoking a cigarette.

"listen man, i didn't mean to put you on the spot i just figured-"

"do you know why you're here, steve?"

"like...as in on this earth?"

silence is shared between the two of them before eddie take a long drag from his cigarette.

"no," he coughed out. "on oneshot night."

eddie takes his silence as a no and blows out a streak of smoke.

"she wants us to get closer. she figured since this my area of...expertise," he says with a smile. "she thought i'd be chill. laid back even!"

steve nods his head and chuckled at the fact that you think your brother would ever be calm.

"but let me be clear." eddie flicked his cigarette on the floor and stomped on it while blowing out whatever smoke he had left. "i am not calm when it comes to my sister. if i see her crying and she tells me it's because of you, i will break all of your fingers and feed you to that vicious dog."

steve gulps and looks at the dog eddie was pointing at that was sat next to his car.

"a cat could eat that dog."

"shut up!"

steve slowly takes the bag of cheetos out from behind his back and hands it to eddie with a smile on his face. eddie looks from the bag to steve's face before smiling and taking the bag of chips. he pops one into his mouth and walks back toward the building.

"i expect her home by 11! don't keep me waiting harrington, killer is a very hungry boy."

the small dog yapped at the two boys and ran in the opposite direction of them. you poked your head out once eddie was gone and stepped outside of the building.

"so, how'd it go?"

steve smiled and threw an arm around you.

"let's go hot shot, i have to have you home by eleven or your brother will feed me to the school's stray."

you let out a squeal and jumped into steve's arm laughing when he spun you around.

"HEY!"

you and steve look back at the school and see a very angry looking dustin.

"IF YOU BRING HIM BACK HERE TO PLAY AGAIN IM GOING TO KILL YOUR CHARACTER SO HARD. YOU'LL BE DEADER THAN STEVE'S DWARF!"

"I WAS A BARD!"

"do you even know what a bard is?" you asked him.

steve shook his head. "it sounded cool when your brother said it."

#stranger things imagine #stranger things x reader #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington blurb #steve harrington stranger things #stranger things fluff #stranger things blurb

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markandlexies · 4 years ago

Text

The One With Will and JJ’s Wedding - Part 2

Summary: Based off of 7.24 and 8.01 of Friends! During Will and JJ’s wedding, the group finds out who is actually pregnant and try to figure out who the father is, a mysterious red sweater being their only clue.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader (eventually lol)

Word Count: 4.1k

A/N: Hey! Thanks for the love on the last chapter! I apologize that there is barely any Spence and Reader rn but it’ll def pick up in the next chapter! Keep sending responses and requests! I love to hear from you guys! And yes, I picked this gif on purpose. Enjoy!

Masterlist - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3

While the guests of the evening went on to party and get plastered, you, Spencer, Emily, Hotch, Penelope, Derek and Rossi had stayed to take pictures with the newly weds.

You, Emily and Penelope sat and watched while JJ and Will took photos with the men.

While the cameraman changed film, Morgan leaned over to JJ and whispered, “Okay, I-I know, I’m not supposed to know but I do and I am so excited for you!”

Clearly not being as low as he thought he was being, Spencer’s head perked up, “Wait, what’s going on?”

Before JJ could even respond, Morgan cheered, “JJ’s pregnant!”

Hotch and Rossi’s heads immediately turned at the news and they broke out in huge smiles.

“Oh my God, JJ!” Spencer smiled, pulling her into a hug.

Will just laughed to himself as Rossi followed with two kisses to the cheek and Hotch gasped with a, “This is great news!”

“Thank you guys, but I’m not pregnant!”

“Oh, slow swimmers?” Rossi asked Will who gave him a bewildered look.

“W-what?! What do you mean, you’re not pregnant?” Morgan clearly confused.

JJ pinched the bridge of her nose, “Derek, you didn’t tell anyone I was, did you?”

“No…” he paused. “I’ll be right back.”

While Derek scurried away to go correct the mess he had made, JJ turned to Spencer, ushering him to go after the man and make sure he didn’t make the situation any worse. As he left, the cameraman told Rossi and Hotch they were free to leave and it was now turn for the pictures with the bridesmaids.

Waltzing up to the pair, Penelope asked, “JJ, why’d you tell the guys you weren’t pregnant?”

“Because I’m not!” She replied, clearly fed up with having to go through this so many times.

Emily rolled her eyes, “We found your test in the garbage, I mean, if you’re not pregnant than-“

You looked up and stared at Emily with desperate eyes, hoping she would understand what you were trying to tell her. Her mouth flew open for only a split second as she caught on, “It’s because I am.”

JJ and Will looked at each other in shock as the cameraman continued to snap pictures of the conversation beforehand. You wanted to tell him to stop and that this was something you never wanted to remember.

Before the two could even get a word out, Penelope shrieked, “What are you talking about?!”

“I-It’s true. Um, I am with child. I just didn’t want to say anything because it’s your day!” Emily explained and you prayed they were buying it. “I didn’t wanna steal your thunder!”

JJ’s hand flew to her forehead as she tried to comprehend this. “Wait a minute, so you thought telling people I was pregnant was a better idea?”

“Emily, who’s the father?” Will asked.

“I-I can’t say.”

While JJ and Will were having their first dance, Emily found it as the perfect opportunity to interrogate you.

“Y/N, what the hell!?” she scream whispered, taking the seat next to yours.

“Thank you for doing that, Em. I just can’t deal with the stress right now of telling everyone,” you sighed, grabbing her hand and giving her a soft smile.

Emily’s harsh expression fell and she squeezed your hand back. “God, Y/N/N, why didn’t you just tell me? You didn’t have to pretend JJ was the pregnant one!”

“I mean technically you said she was, I just didn’t disagree with you!”

“Sneaky!” she gasped.

“Listen, I wanna talk about it… but I’m just not ready yet,” you sighed, hoping she would understand.

“Yeah, yeah! Of course…”

There was a pause.

“Are you ready to talk about it now?”

“Em, no.”

She nodded and there was another pause.

“Now?”

“No!”

“Okay, fine! We’ll talk about something else!” she said defensively throwing her hands in the air. You nodded, silently thanking her for her long awaited cooperation.

“So, who’s the father?”

You rolled your eyes, flicking her in the head which earned you an ‘Ow!’.

“Look, I haven’t told him yet so until I do, I don’t think I should tell anybody else,” you whispered.

“No, yeah. That’s fair, I understand… Is it Hotch?”

Your eyes nearly bugged out of your head as you scolded her, “Emily, no!”

“Fine, I’ll stop!” She apologized. “It’s Reid, isn’t it?”

You groaned, putting your face in your hands.

She gasped before whispering, “Oh God, don’t tell me it’s Derek’s!”

She continued to guess as you ignored her and drowned her out, your eyes focusing on him just across the room. He was laughing at something Rossi had said and you couldn’t help the guilt you felt flooding through your chest, knowing you were holding in information that would soon flip his entire world upside down.

The guests broke out into cheers and applause as JJ and Will concluded they’re dance, sharing a kiss before they parted. You kicked Emily in the shin as you noticed JJ walking towards your table, begging her to stop listening off names of men that could possibly be your baby daddy.

“Hello, my beautiful best friends and bridesmaids!” She gushed hugging you both from the back.

You smiled back up at her as she took a seat next to you and noticed Derek and Garcia making their way to your table next.

Grinning, Derek held out his hand to Emily and said, “Come on, Prentiss, I know you’re dying to move that thing out on the dance floor!”

She laughed grabbing his hand and letting him lead her to the crowd of dancing friends and family while Penelope took her seat.

“She better be having all the fun she can right now, pretty soon she’s gonna be all miserable and in pain with a baby inside of her, making life hell.” Penelope laughed, watching her two best friends make a fool of themselves dancing provocatively.

You nervously laughed, breaking off a piece of bread from the bowl infront of you.

JJ shook her head, “I can’t believe it, you guys! I mean, how dumb do you have to be to get pregnant?”

You snapped your head up at the bride, “Hey, you know, sometimes you can do everything right, everyone can wear what they’re supposed to wear and one of those little guys just gets through!”

JJ met your eyes and furrowed her brows at your defensive tone. Before she could respond, Garcia asked, “How?”

“Ugh, I don’t know! Maybe they have tools!” You sighed, defeated.

“Listen, I talked to her, and she said she’s having this baby. She said she’s gonna raise it all on her own…” JJ shrugged, smoothing down her dress.

“Well… maybe that’s really brave of her…” you started to say, a wave of nausea hitting you for the third time that day.

“I just hope she realizes how hard it’s gonna be. How is she gonna handle this financially? How is she gonna juggle work? I mean, does she realize she’s not gonna have a date again for the next 18 years?” Penelope sighed, putting her chin in her hand, watching her poor knocked up friend on the dance floor.

At Penelope’s words, suddenly tears were threatening to spill and you felt JJ’s eyes on you. You knew it wouldn’t be easy of course, but the girls were making some valid points that had never even crossed your mind. Your thoughts were interrupted by the waiter behind you, “Champagne?”

“Oh yes, please!” Penelope cheered taking two and passing one to you. JJ had taken one and politely thanked the waiter as he left.

You let out a sigh of relief, desperately needing something to take the edge off as you brought the lovely beige liquid up to your lips and took a sip. You had then realized what you were doing and stopped in your tracks, eyes wide. Looking down slowly, you spit the contents back into your glass, hoping the girls didn’t notice.

“Oh, th-that’s actually how the French drink it…” you stammered as you looked up at the girls who’s eyes were about to pop out of their heads.

JJ raised her finger and pointed at you as Penelope draped her hand over her mouth.

“O-Oh my-“

Before she could get out the words, Emily waltzed back over to the table, “Well I sure hope this baby gets my dancing genes because let me tell you, this ass doesn’t quit!” She took a seat next to Penelope, completely oblivious to what was just realized.

JJ rolled her eyes before saying, “Oh, give it up! Y/N’s really the one who’s pregnant?!”

“What?!” Emily shouted, pretending to be in shock.

She was met with eyes of unamusement.

“Oh, why bother?” She sighed, giving up the act.

“Y/N/N, how do you feel?” Penelope asked, concern washing over her face.

“I don’t know… I don’t know how I feel. This is all happening so fast and I have to make all these decisions that I don’t want to make!” You whined, bringing the champagne to your lips again, quickly spitting it out as you remembered you were with child. “Oh, someone just take this away from me!”

JJ grabbed it from your hands and set it down as Emily came to a realization, “You know, maybe you’re not even pregnant! Theres false positives all the time!”

Penelope nodded in agreement, “Yeah! Are you sure you peed on the stick right?”

“How many ways are there to do that?”

“Just relax, okay? Don’t freak out until you’re 100% sure.” Penelope said, giving your hand a gentle squeeze.

“Yeah… you’re right. I’ll take another one when I get home.”

“What? Come on! You gotta take it now! It could be your wedding present to me!” JJ begged.

You nodded, agreeing that you would do it.

Penelope cheered, “Ooh! Yay, I’ll run out and go get you one!”

“Wait-“ JJ gasped, stopping Penelope in her tracks. “Who’s the father?!”

Emily rolled her eyes, “Oh, please. I’ve been trying all day. She won’t say.”

“It’s my wedding! Come on, you gotta tell me! That could be my present!”

“Hey, I just gave you peeing on a stick as your present!”

“How much longer?” You asked, pacing the bathroom floor.

“Thirty seconds.” Penelope replied, holding the little stick in her hands.

JJ barged through the door, “Did I miss it?”

Emily shook her head, as she tried to calm you down, rubbing small circles on your back. You were so scared, as if the responsibility of being a mother wasn’t enough, you still had to tell the father too.

JJ walked over to you, grabbing your hands. “Y/N/N, I want you to know that if it’s positive… we’re- we’re gonna-“ She couldn’t even finish her sentence, but she didn’t need to.

“I know…” You smiled, tears threatening to spill. You knew that no matter what the results were, you had your girls.

“It’s time.”

You dropped JJ’s hands and walked over to Garcia, who was handing you the test.

You held it in your hands as Garcia put a comforting hand on your shoulder. “I-I can’t look at it. Someone else look at it for me, please?”

Emily nodded understanding your apprehension and took it gently from you, also picking up the little instruction book to decipher what the lines meant. JJ and Garcia both waited in anticipation.

There was a pause.

“It’s negative.”

You turned, meeting her eyes. “What?”

“It’s negative.” She repeated.

“Oh…” You frowned, tears back at the surface. “Would you look at that?” You forced out a laugh. “That is, that’s great. That is really great, great news.” You stammered.

“You know cause the whole… not being ready and the financial aspects.” You continued. “Wow, this is just so the way this is supposed to be.” While your words may have sounded convincing, the look on your face gave it all away. You sighed as JJ walked over to you, “Well then, thats great…” she whispered, trying to read your emotions.

Tears had started to fall and Garcia went and grabbed tissues handing them to you at an alarmingly fast rate. “This is so stupid!” You choked out, dabbing at your eyes. “How could I be upset over something I never had?” As the words left your mouth, JJ wrapped you in a hug, Garcia quick to follow.

As you clung to them, you looked up once more and looked up at Emily who was still standing in the same spot. “God, it’s really negative?”

“No, it’s positive.” She smiled.

JJ and Penelope turned around and looked at her, their jaws dropped. You let out a gasp, your hand covering your mouth. “What?!”

“I-I lied… It’s positive.”

JJ turned to you in shock, wiping at the tears that had formed around her own eyes.

“Oh my God…” Garcia cried as Emily passed you the test to look for yourself.

“Now you know how you really feel about it!” Emily smiled.

“Oh, thats a risky little game!”

JJ’s smile was radiant as she stood beside you to also get a look at the little stick in your hand. “Are you really gonna do this?”

“Yeah…” You muttered, eyes still leaking with tears. “I’m gonna have a baby…”

“I’m gonna have a baby!” You cheered as you were met with three pairs of open arms. You all wept in happiness together before Garcia pulled back and asked, “With who?”

“It’s still not the time!”

The wedding had finally ended and the following day, you, Emily and Penelope were all sitting around in JJ and Will’s apartment, like usual.

As the conversation about the previous day had died down, you had decided to finally speak up.

“Guy’s, today I’m gonna tell the father of the baby.”

The girls cheered in excitement, not being able to wait any longer for the big reveal.

“It is so weird! I mean, you’re gonna tell this guy today and he has no idea what’s gonna happen!” JJ pointed out, taking a sip from the coffee mug in her hands.

“Yeah, you’re just gonna knock on his door and change his life forever!” Emily added.

“Yeah… I guess it is pretty big news…” you sighed, taking a seat next to JJ on the couch.

“Pretty big? It’s huge! God this guy doesn’t have a clue. He’s just walking down the street thinking, ‘I had sex with Y/N Y/L/N! I rock!’ Then bam!” Penelope clapped her hands. “Now he’s a father, everything’s different.

“Well it’s only gonna be different if he wants it to be. I mean, I’m not gonna ask him for anything…” You defended, anxiously running your hands through your hair.

“Well, he still has this huge decision to make. Now he’s walking around thinking, ‘Do I want to be a dad?’ and then, bam!” Penelope exclaimed clapping her hands again, never finishing her sentence.

“What was that bam?” JJ asked.

“I don’t know. H-he’s hit by a bus or something.”

Before you had time to process Penelope’s words, Morgan walked through the door, immediately sauntering over to the fridge.

“Hey, Derek, what would you do if someone that you slept with told you she was pregnant?” You asked, craving a guy’s perspective.

Slamming the fridge door he looked up at you wide eyed. “Who called here?!”

The girls rolled their eyes as his panicked expression only continued. “Did she sound blonde? Did she have an accent?! I gotta make a call-“ He began to run towards the door.

“Derek! Derek, it’s not you! You didn’t get anybody pregnant!” You called out to him, making him stop in his tracks.

He let out a sigh of relief, clutching his chest. “Why would you scare me like that?! What the hell’s going on?”

There was a long silence as Derek made his way over to the living room, raising a finger. “Is somebody pregnant?”

You scoffed, trying to play off your nervousness, before you turned to Emily, giving her those same desperate eyes from the night before.

“Oh, yeah! That’s me!” Emily laughed awkwardly.

“Oh my God! Em! You’re gonna have a baby?” He gasped, walking towards her.

“Yes, yes I am.” She said smiling as he walked up and pulled her into a hug.

Derek was so excited for her he almost forgot to ask the most important question. “Wait- who’s the father?”

“You don’t know him. It’s not important. He wants nothing to do with me or the baby.”

Derek’s jaw was on the floor. “Who is this guy?! Huh? Cause I will track him down and kick his ass!”

Emily was at a loss for words as Penelope spoke up, “I know she doesn’t want to say it… but his name is Kevin Lynch!”

That was all Derek had to hear as he angrily turned away and stormed out of the apartment, muttering the name ‘Kevin Lynch’ under his breath.

As the door slammed shut, all three of you turned your heads to Garcia.

“Pen, who’s Kevin Lynch?”

“Oh, some guy from work. He’s a little annoying.” She shrugged.

A couple of hours later, you found yourself sitting alone in O’Keefes, nursing a cup of tea with a racing mind. You had played the conversation from earlier in your head a million times, you were so scared to drop this bomb on him. You didn’t want to make him feel obligated to care for you and the baby.

While you freaked out, Emily, and Penelope stayed in the apartment trying to stop JJ from opening up all the wedding presents without Will.

Derek had quickly barged through the door. “Um, Emily…”

“Yeah, what is it?”

“Alright, sit down. I have something I wanna say!” Emily obliged and took the seat, not without clutching her stomach and giving her non existent baby a small pat. “It’s a scary world out there, especially for a single mother.”

JJ and Penelope listened intently, having no idea where this was going. “Now, I’ve always felt you and me have had this special connection, a special bond…” He had crouched down, getting on one knee, pulling a box from his back pocket. The girls gasped.

“Emily Prentiss… will you marry me?”

Emily was in awe looking between Derek and the ring.

“Oh my God!” JJ exclaimed, rolling her eyes.

“Derek, what about me? I thought we promised that if we both weren’t married within the next ten years, we were each others backup plan!” Garcia croaked.

“Derek-” JJ started walking towards the two but was cut off by Emily excitedly putting the ring on her finger. “Hell yeah I’ll marry you!”

“Em, you can’t marry him-“

“Hey, lady, your day’s over. It’s my turn!” She retorted, grinning down at the hand.

“Hey! Why can’t she marry me?”

Penelope stood up this time. “Because she’s not pregnant! It’s Y/N! Y/N’s pregnant!”

“Hey!” Emily whined.

“I think he would notice when you didn’t have a baby in nine months!”

“Oh please, it’s Derek!” Emily complained. There was really no arguing with that.

“Wait so if Y/N’s pregnant, who’s the father?” Derek asked in shock.

“That’s the thing, we don’t know.”

There was a silence before Derek was struck with realization. “You know… about a month ago, this guy spent the night with Y/N… now I didn’t see who it was, but…” and just like that he walked out.

“Was that story over?” Garcia asked as the trio followed him out to his apartment across the hall.

Derek emerged from his room holding a bright red sweater. The girl’s gasped as Penelope took it from Derek’s hands.

“Oh my God, I know who the father is!”

The next morning, you and Penelope began to walk to O’Keefes. Before you could open the door, she reached out to stop you.

“I have a surprise for you!”

“Pen… what is it?” You asked reluctantly.

“I called the father for you!” She said smiling.

“You what?! How did you even know-“ You stopped as she showed you the bright red sweater you had been pulling off just a month ago. You gasped.

“I believe this belongs to the father of your baby!” She gushed, holding it up.

“Oh, God… he’s in there right now?”

“Yep! You got this, Pretty Girl. Just go in there and rip the bandaid off!” And with that she pushed you inside and you were met with the eyes of your ex, Luke Alvez. Honestly you were surprised Penelope had even called him, she had genuinely never liked the guy.

“L-Luke?” You managed to choke out as you sat in the chair across from him.

Penelope followed you to the table, already rolling her eyes at the man in front of her. “Y/N has something to tell you.” She pulled the sweater from behind her back. “I believe this belongs to you.”

Luke gave a confused look as he began to pull down the zipper of his jacket. “Actually, no. This is my red sweater.”

You immediately put your head in your hands as Penelope’s jaw dropped.

“Oh no…” She stuttered. It was silent. “Can I get anyone a coffee… or a poison? No? Just for me? Oh, okay!” And with that she ran away, knowing she had messed up big time.

“So, what’s up, Y/N?” He asked, smiling at you.

“I’m sorry, Luke. But Pen made a mistake-“

“You know I’m actually glad she called. I’ve been meaning to reach out and see if maybe you’d be interested in getting drinks sometime soon. I really miss… us.” He confessed, grabbing your hand.

“This isn’t a great time…” you trailed off.

“Trust me, it is. I’m ready to be fully committed and mature this time around, Y/N.”

“Luke-“

“Come on, let’s give us another try.”

“Luke, I’m having a baby.” You gulped, him dropping your hand at the speed of light.

There was a long pause.

“You can go.” He didn’t even think twice before running out of O’Keefes at the speed of light.

You and Penelope walked back to JJ’s in silence. You weren’t mad at her, you knew she was only trying to help. You were more mad at yourself for not having the courage to just tell the actual father the truth.

You walked in the door, placing the red sweater and your bag on the kitchen table. Derek was the first person to speak up.

“How did Luke take it?”

“One, Luke isn’t the father!” You huffed. “And two, who told Derek?!”

You looked around at JJ and Emily’s guilty faces as Derek interjected. “Y/N… I am so happy for you.” He pulled you into a hug, being careful not to squeeze you too hard, and you couldn’t help but smile.

“Oh, wow, you didn’t even try to unhook my bra this time!” You exclaimed as he pulled back. He laughed before he got down on one knee in front of you. You looked behind you at the girls in shock as they rolled their eyes.

He shook his head and grabbed your hand. “Listen, it’s a scary world out there, especially for a single mom. I’ve always thought that you and I have this special bond, you know? So, Y/N Y/L/N…” He smiled softly up at you. “Will you marry me?”

“What?” you sputtered along with JJ and Emily and Garcia who let out an, “Again?!”

“Emily! Give me the ring back!” He whispered, never breaking eye contact with you.

“No!”

“Oh, Derek! You’re so sweet! But I’m not looking for a husband.” You sighed, ushering him to stand up.

He frowned and nodded, “It’s fine… I understand.”

You smiled softly as you gathered your belongings. “Now, if you will, excuse me I’m gonna go and lie down.” You left the room with a wave to the rest of the girls, promising to see them later. There was a lot on your mind and you just needed a second to breathe.

As the door closed, Emily walked up to Derek, shaking her head. “I can’t say that didn’t hurt.” JJ pinched the bridge of her nose, not believing this was still going on. “But I’ll take you back Derek Morgan.”

“Um, Em… About that-“ Saved by the bell, Spencer and Hotch walked in the room, greeting everybody with a wave.

Morgan jumped up, trying to distract Emily from the previous conversation, “Look everybody! Spencer’s here!” He chuckled nervously. Hotch rolled his eyes and raised his hands up, clearly offended by being ignored.

Spencer looked around confused before just deciding to ignore Morgan’s strange behavior that he was so used to.

“Anyway, you guys ready to go to that movie-“ He began to feel around his pockets, groaning as he realized he had forgotten something. “Hold that thought, I forgot my wallet.” He began to walk out but was immediately stopped short as he noticed something on the table.

“Hey! My sweater-“ He spoke, walking over to where it was laying, picking it up and examining it.

“I’ve been looking for this, for like, a month!” He laughed, before walking out.

JJ, Emily and Penelope all looked around, mouths dangling open.

“Oh my God!”

“No way!”

“It’s Reid!”

Morgan looked at the girls with a puzzled expression. They just started back at him waiting for the realization to come, which hit five seconds later.

“Oh my God!” He yelled, pointing to where Spencer had just left.

Hotch looked around confused.

“Did I miss something?”

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid imagine #criminal minds #criminal minds friends au #criminal minds self insert #criminal minds fanfic #criminal minds au #mgg #mgg x reader

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bangchanstudio · 4 years ago

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Never Have I Ever | Changbin (2/?)

pairing: seo changbin x fem! reader

genre: university au, awkward friends to ? something more?, smut, mild angst, dom!changbin tendencies?, oral (giving)

tw: sex..ish

word count: 4.6k

ch.one // ch.three

synopsis: you couldn’t for the life of you remember what the fuck happened at the party that made Changbin avoid you like the plague. your friends clearly succeed in their quest to get you drunk, but now you’re left wondering what happened after you went into that room with Changbin. It bothered you so much that you ended up at his door step in the middle of the night looking for clarity, instead you found yourself in other shit.

note: again, i don’t know what the fuck i’m doing, but i hope you like it! I’m going to start a taglist for this, if you want to be added let me know in the tags or send me a message!

“What the hell was that?” No one would look at you.

Seungmin was sipping on his iced peach tea looking rather interested in his nails, Jinnie was clearing his throat and touching up his face in his little compact mirror, Felix was playing god knows what on his phone and Jisung was just straight up staring at the ceiling.

“Hello?” You said, snapping your fingers in everyone’s face. “Is no one going to answer?”

Seungmin looked at Jinnie, who in turn looked at Felix who just shrugged before saying, “She’ll find out eventually.”

“What will she find out eventually? That my friends are all backstabbing assholes? Well, she already knows that!” You massaged your temple remembering the events of the night before. Never have I ever, admitting your secrets, sitting on Changbin’s lap, and then worse: getting locked in the bedroom with him watching explicit videos before being allowed freedom. There was something else… but your mind was too fuzzy to remember exactly what.

Frustrated you reached for your phone that was face down on the cafe table, mumbling about how unfair all of this was.

Jisung sighed before wrapping his arms around your shoulders, snuggling his cheek to yours, “Don’t be upset, (Y/N). We were just trying to have a little fun.”

Out of all of your friends, the one you couldn’t ever be mad at was Jisung. There was just something about him that made you want to protect him, he was funny and sweet. He was always the first one to notice when you were upset and made it his personal life goal to make you smile. While, you had never been mad at him before, you were pretty close to being mad at him now.

“Fun at the expense of my sanity?” You pouted accepting Ji’s hug and snuggled into the crook of his neck. Your eyes locked on Hyunjin’s who was seated across from you, his beautiful chocolate brown eyes that looked lighter today. They were loud and calculating. You could tell he was, for once, thinking of what he should say.

“Yes, because your sanity is exactly what I plan on destroying.” He smirked his mean girl smile before excusing himself for his next class.

One by one everyone left until it was just you and your laptop. There was an empty word document pulled up on half the screen and the other half was displaying the most recent chapter of Freaking Romance webtoon. Studying wasn’t your strong suit and neither was focusing on a single task for more than a few minutes at a time.

“What an asshole,” You mumbled to your screen, clicking your pen ferociously.

“Oi,” Chan greeted before dumping a textbook on the table startling you and causing the pen you were beating to fall to the floor.

Reaching over to grab it another hand beat you to it. You looked up and came face to face with Changbin.

“Shit,” you said. You tried sitting up straight too quickly and bumped heads with him on the way up, “I’m so sorry.”

Idiot! Why are you being so jumpy? You scolded yourself, rubbing the top of your head that clashed with Changbin’s. Your cheeks turned red as the memory of you sitting on his lap last night came rushing back. The way his eyebrow raised when you drank to kissing a girl, the way his eyes fixated on yours as you drank to “Never have I ever thought of someone else while having sex”, the way his hands clenched in his jacket pockets up on the rooftop, to following him into the bedroom to watch p*rn, to… what else happened? Your memory was still too fuzzy to recall anything other than his back as you followed him into the bedroom. The feeling of a memory being just out of reach annoyed you.

“I just came to give this back,” Chan said placing the book he borrowed next to your laptop. It was Hermann Hesse’s “Demian”, you let Chan borrow it at the start of summer, you honestly thought he had lost it or threw it away.

“It took you six months to read one book? I thought you threw it away or something.” You laughed, flipping through your old book remembering when you had read it for the very first time. Now, it smelled like Chan’s room. “Anyways, what happened last night? I don’t remember much just waking up on the couch, but no one was home.”

Under normal circumstances and to normal friend groups that might not have been the weirdest thing, but to your friends that was abnormal. Everyone knew the passcode to your apartment and you often found one or multiple of the guys there unexpectedly. When you had your get togethers everyone stayed over, always, at least until noon the following day or whenever you had classes. This morning was the first time you woke up after a party to an empty place.

“Oh, we just-“ Chan started before being interrupted by Changbin dragging him away by his backpack. You weren’t sure, since his cap was hiding his face like usual, but you could have sworn his face was… red.

“Sorry (Y/N) we’re late for something and I gotta steal this guy.” Changbin shouted before rushing out the door, Chan practically fell over in the process.

Well, that was weird.

—

Changbin was avoiding you, again. This time you knew for sure he was avoiding you. It had been 2 weeks since your get together and anytime he so much as spotted you within a 20-foot radius he would turn on his heels and disappear. No matter how hard you pushed for someone to tell you something, no one budged. Everyone insisted that you both went into the room, watched one video and that was the end of that. If that were true then why was Changbin avoiding you like the plague?

Was he really that freaked out over watching some vanilla p*rn?

“(Y/N), can I ask you something?” Chan was cooking breakfast in the kitchen while you finished citing your sources for Lit.

“Mm?”

“You know Changbin likes you, right?”

Your fingers stopped typing, eyes snapping over to Chan from the table, “He what?”

Chan came around placing a small plate of eggs and toast in front of you before taking a seat. “Changbin likes you.”

Maybe smoking really was bad for you after all. “I’m sorry, what did you say? I thought I heard you say that Changbin likes me.”

A nervous laughed left your lips as you sipped at your morning coffee. The warmth soothing your building nerves.

Chan was giving you that look again. The one where he lets you see the honesty in his eyes and on his face. He was really handsome, like really handsome. Even though you started out having a crush on him, that quickly faded into pure platonic love for him after the first few months of being friends. He was too kind and pure for you after all. Chan was good; you doubted you were. No matter how much you searched his face, his eyes, his lips for a twitch or some kind of giveaway that he was lying, anything.

There was nothing.  He was telling the truth.

“Seo Changbin, likes you.” Chan said, emphasizing every single word as if to get it through your thick skull.

You squeezed your eyes shut, shaking your head, “If that were true, then why is he avoiding me?” You didn’t mean to sound so annoyed, especially when it wasn’t even Chan whom you were annoyed with, you couldn’t help it. Part of you felt like this whole party had been a set up just to embarrass you.

Chan raked his hands through his hair in mild annoyance, but he usually wasn’t one to get annoyed in the first place so any time he displayed any type of annoyance it made you flinch. “I don’t know, (Y/N), why don’t you just ask him?”

That was a lie.

The blinking of the line where you left off typing was your only source of distraction. You didn’t want to look up. Why am I like this?, you thought, just talk to Changbin. Stop making things awkward.

—

It was late probably close to midnight. Your whole day was spent contemplating Chan’s words, flipping them around and upside down. Picking them apart and putting them back together to form “Changbin likes you.” Before you realized what you were doing you found yourself outside of Changbin’s apartment. He transferred a week into the semester which is why he wasn’t placed with one of the guys.

“Can I help you?” You jumped as a tall guy appeared seemingly out of nowhere. He had a backpack slung over his shoulder and textbooks in the other.

“Oh, s-sorry, I was just looking for a friend.” You stuttered waving to the door.

“Does this friend have a name?”

“Changbin.”

The guy nodded telling you to follow him inside the apartment. He said something about it not being wise to leave a girl out in the cold. After you stepped into the warm apartment you were grateful. Your thoughts had consumed you to the point of not even grabbing a jacket when you left your place. He said his name was Sam and that he was going to be gone that night, so to feel free to stay over. You blushed and told him he was mistaking the situation. Sam seemed nice enough.

He called out for Changbin as he walked into his room.

“I’m in the shower!” You heard Changbin call out.

“There’s someone here to see you!” Sam called back.

“Be out in a sec!”

Sam gave you kind smile, “Make yourself at home, I just came to get change of clothes.”

He was in and out of his room in seconds, leaving you alone in the quiet apartment, the only sound coming from the shower. Changbin had music playing in the bathroom and you sat nervously on the couch, scolding yourself for coming here in the first place.

It’s not like you planned to confess your feelings for him. Maybe you just wanted things to go back to the way they were, back to those long afternoons in your high school hideout where everyone laughed and cried together. Where you fought and made up. Where you did homework and tried cheap drugs together. Back to when you didn’t fear holding onto Changbin, in that dark forest, because you trusted him with your life.

The click of the bathroom door opening broke through your thoughts.

“Oh, it’s you.” Changbin was shirtless, with only joggers and a towel wrapped around his shoulders. You tried to avert your gaze as fast as possible, biting your lip to keep yourself from squealing, your face flushed. How could he be so hot? His arms looked bigger than Chan’s now, and his chest could no undoubtedly be dubbed the eighth wonder of the world. “What are you doing here?”

“I just… came to see you.” Great response. There was no way you could stay here, “Maybe I should come back later, I didn’t realize it was this late. Honestly, I’m not even sure how I ended up here…”  “No, it’s okay. You can stay.” Changbin said stepping closer before realizing he was still half naked. He lifted his towel from around his shoulders to dry his hair, “Wait here, I’m just going to grab a shirt.”

When he came back he offered you a glass of water, apologizing for not having anything better like tea or coffee.

“It was my roommates turn to do the grocery shopping but he’s pre-med and forgets shit easily.” He said from the opposite side of the couch.

You sat cross legged facing him from your side. Just being this close to him gave you those annoying butterflies in your tummy. Changbin mindlessly flipped through the channels of the TV before deciding on a horror movie.

“So… why are you really here?” You were expecting the question from the moment you stepped foot into the apartment, but still hadn’t worked out a decent answer. Changbin turned to face you straight on for the first time that night.

His face was unreadable, the way it usually was. Damp hair, dark eyes, fresh skin.

“I came to ask… if I did something wrong at the party?” The surprise was clear on his face, he wasn’t expecting that. “I don’t really remember anything after we walked into the room other than what we were suppose to do. And well, I feel like you’ve sort of been avoiding me since then. I know we don’t really talk anymore, but it just seemed like you were actively avoiding me these days… I just thought maybe there was a reason.. ?”

Changbin searched your face before looking down and smirking. “You really don’t remember anything? Like.. at all?”

You shook your head, the worry in your chest building. What if you said something pervy or worse, tried to seduce him? The thought made you visibly shake.

“Nope, nothing.”

He shrugged, “We watched porn. You chose. It was a pretty good video. After that I left and you stayed.”

Something still felt off, there was still something missing. While, you didn’t know Changbin’s tells as well as you did Chan’s, you still felt as if he was holding something back, “Really? That’s what Seungmin told me but I just feel like there’s something missing.”

You squinted, and spaced out before bring the glass of water up to your teeth and tapping it slightly against them.

The only memories that seemed to comeback were feelings of heat and something grabbing your jaw…

“Oh my fuck!” You shouted as a blood curling scream echoed from the movie scaring you half way to death. The mostly full glass of water you just had was now empty in your lap, your white t-shirt and jeans soaked. “Shit, I’m so sorry.”

Changbin laughed as he got up and helped you, taking the glass off of your lap and placing it on the side table.

“Why are you apologizing to me? You’re the one who’s drenched. Come here, I’ll let you borrow some clothes.” You followed Changbin into his room. It was painted a dark grey and decorated with the basics: a bed, desk, recording equipment — of course — and a laptop. There was something else on his desk that caught your attention.

It was your high school Photo ID card, senior year.

“You still have this?” You asked smiling and turning to show him the card. It was customary for friends to trade Photo ID cards at the end of school years, usually middle schoolers and high schoolers did so. There was no particular reason why you gave yours to Changbin other than the fact that he was the first one to ask you for it. Jisung pouted for days afterwards, but you reminded him he had your junior year ID card. He still didn’t give it up easily.

Changbin’s cheeks turned a light pink, “Oh, yeah. It’s cute.”

“Didn’t really take you for the sentimental type.” You mumbled bitterly before placing the card back on his desk.

“What is that suppose to mean?” There was hurt in his voice.

When did he step closer?

“I just figured you weren’t that sentimental…” You trailed off distracting yourself with looking around his room, anywhere but at him. “You didn’t seem to care.”

The words slipped out before you could swallow them. You squeezed your eyes shut, exhaling. “Maybe I should just go. Coming here was a bad idea.”

You tried brushing past him but he caught your wrist with a tight grip. He didn’t pull you back, but he didn’t let you go either.

“I’m sorry… for leaving.”

Your eyes widened in shock.

The truth was, it wasn’t all his parents fault. He could have stayed if he wanted to, but he didn’t. You didn’t find that out until later though, one night when Jinnie was too drunk for his own good and was scolding you for not trying to move on. He called it the worst break up to never exist. Whatever that was suppose to mean. There was no hiding your true feelings from your friends, they all knew you were in love with Changbin, even if you were too stubborn to admit it to yourself. It was stupid, you were nothing to Changbin, he didn’t have a reason to stay in the first place.

“The truth is, I was scared of falling in love with you… so I ran away.” His grip tightened around your wrist, you wondered if maybe he’d cut your circulation.

His words made your heart sink.

“Am I really that terrible, that you’d rather leave than want me?” Your voice was small, the tears you were trying so desperately to keep at bay were blurring your vision. Your fists were clenched tight, you could feel your nails leaving moon marks on your palms.

“I was scared of hurting you, (Y/N). That’s why. There are things about me that you don’t know, things I’ve never shared with anyone. Things I’ve done that I’m not proud of. Things that could have hurt you, things that could have put you in danger. Not only you but everyone else too.” His voice was so full of pain, all you wanted to do was take it away.

You turned to face him, he was breathing a little heavier, and his voice was shaking. In that moment it was as if you were scared teenagers again.

“You didn’t have to push us away like that, Changbin. We could have helped you, we could have come up with a plan or—“ You weren’t sure what he meant by putting you all in danger but you knew if you were all together, there was nothing that could stop you. “Why didn’t you let us in?”

The tears spilled over, running down your cheeks, your voice was weak. You covered your mouth with your freehand closing your eyes trying to center yourself again, trying desperately to get a hold of yourself. There was nothing worse than letting people see you cry.

“I didn’t realize..” Changbin didn’t finish his sentence, instead he pulled you to his chest wrapping his arms around your waist and burying his face in the crook of your neck, “I’m so sorry for hurting you.”

He was warm.. he always was. You could feel his heartbeat racing, and his breathing hitch as if he was trying to hold back his feelings too.

You hid your face in his chest, sobs escaping your lips, fists clenched on the hem of his t-shirt. Minutes passed; it felt like hours. Neither of you spoke a word, instead the room was echoed with your small sniffles. The sound of Changbin’s heartbeat returned to normal after awhile and you felt like you could sleep for days after that long cry.

“Sorry for crying,” It took you a minute to find your voice, “I think I’m going crazy.”

Changbin brushed your hair to the side, “Stop apologizing. It’s okay. I’m the one who is sorry.”

You looked up at him, still with his arms around you. His eyes were soft and mesmerizing, they reminded you of home. His lips were also pretty and plump, you wanted so desperately to feel them against your own. Just once…

Before you could stop yourself you reached on your tip-toes to meet Changbin’s lips. They were softer than you imagined, like silk or cream. He tensed under your touch before you felt him relax and close his eyes. His hands at the small of your back pushed your body closer to his, your still wet t-shirt making you shiver.

Or was it his touch that made you tremble?

You brought your hands up to his hair, fluffy and soft from being air dried. What started out as a sweet and small kiss soon turned into a deeper and hungrier affair. Your were starting to moan slightly into his mouth when he pulled back.

“I didn’t realize this is what kissing you would feel like.” He breathed, pupils dilated, his breathing was shallow. “Can we keep doing this?”

You nodded pulling him back into your lips, teeth teasing his bottom lip, you felt him smile. Changbin walked you both backwards before finding the edge of his mattress and sitting on it, back to the headboard.

The wet of your clothes was making you shake so you unzipped your pants and pulled them down, kicking them to the side. There was a tshirt folded up on Changbin’s night stand that you grabbed pulling it over your head and on top of your wet one. Then you pulled your arms into your wet one taking it off without revealing yourself to him any more than you already had.

“Nice trick,” Changbin laughed as you discard the wet t-shirt. His fit you big like a mini dress, you felt cute in it brushing your hair behind your ear. “Come here.”

He grabbed your hand, pulling you onto his lap. His body was warm and strong. You felt shy straddling him and couldn’t help burying your face in his shoulder and squealing.

“What are we doing?” You whined making Changbin laugh, the vibrations of his chest running through your hands.

“Whatever you want, baby.” He chimed.

You straighten immediately, “Baby? Since when am I baby?”

“Ever since you made your way onto my lap.” He was so cocky, it turned you on.

His lips crashed on yours with more fever than before, his hands gripping your cold thighs before making their way up and squeezing your ass. He moaned at the feeling of his hands on your skin, the sound was sweet and filled your ears with pleasure. His tongue teased your lips before you granted him access to meet yours, teasing him with your tongue before letting him dominate. You giggled at the sensation, making him laugh too.

“What?” He asked his voice getting lower and raspier, you could hear the smirk in it. “Do you like it when I win?”

“Maybe.” You confessed. You weren’t exactly a full dom, but for Changbin all you wanted was to be a sub. You laid your head on his shoulder, catching your breath. He grabbed your jaw forcing you look him in the eyes.

“What do you want me to do, baby?” His fingers were rough against the skin of your jaw, your eyes wide at the motion. His eyes were so dark, so lusty, so hungry for you. “If you tell me to stop—.”

You shook your head viciously, “No, it’s okay. I wa—“ You stopped yourself from sounding so desperate, what the hell was wrong with you.

“What do you want, baby, come on.. don’t be shy.” Fuck, his voice was so sexy saying those words.

You closed your eyes trying to control your lust.

Bad move. Changbin squeezed your jaw harder with his hand. “Look at me when I talk to you.”

Look at me when I talk to you.

Suddenly, your memory came rushing back from the night of the party. You remembered watching the video, getting hot. Changbin saying how pretty your lips would look around his cock. The way he slipped his fingers in your mouth and your tongue wrapping around them. The way he held your jaw in place as he threatened to dominate you.

How badly you wanted to taste him.

You opened your eyes with new hunger pouring out of them.

“Didn’t you say something about wanting to see my pretty lips around your cock back at the party?” You asked knowingly. Changbin looked at you in shock, his jaw opening before composing himself.

“Did my hand bring back your memory?” He asked cooly.

You nodded biting your lip. “Do you want me show you?”

His bulge had been growing since the moment he saw you in your wet white t-shirt.

“I’ll take whatever you give.” Changbin said making himself comfortable against his pillows.

You moved off of his lap and wasted no time in pushing his joggers and boxers down his thighs, exposing his hard, warm cock. You tried hiding the surprise on your face but nothing got past Changbin.

“What? Like what you see?” He asked raising an eyebrow.

“It’s nice.” You admitted before taking him in your hand, testing the waters. He was bigger than you thought, thicker and longer. You were confident in your skills at sucking someone off but you actually wondered if you could even take all of him in your mouth.

Guess there was only one way to find out.

“Fuck, baby that feels so good.” Changbin hummed, his hand taking a fistful of your hair trying to guide you. He definitely did not fit in your mouth, but what didn’t fit was compensated by your hands. You hollowed your cheeks, always mindful of your teeth. Your tongue swirled around the tip before taking as much of him in as you could. You looked up to find Changbin watching you, making eye contacted just made you wet your panties even more so than they already were. His hips bucked into your mouth making you gag. The sensation causing Changbin to throw his head back, releasing a string of curses under his breath and mentions of how pretty you looked.

You took him out of your mouth with a pop to take a breath, but kept the pace with your hands.

“Do my lips look as pretty as you imagined?” You asked, innocently batting your eyelashes. The move was slutty but it made you feel sexy.

“So much better than I could have imagined.” He groaned in pleasure as you took him in again, deep, gagging, “Fuck, you really are good at this.”

“Mmm.” You mused, the vibrations making him buck his hips into your mouth again.

You could taste his sweet precum start to spill out the sides of your mouth, and your jaw started to ache but that didn’t stop you from sucking and licking his length. You could tell he was getting close to his peak by the way his breathing started to shallow out, the way his hips seemed to buck more frequently. His moans coming faster and louder.

Before he could break, he yanked you off of him by your hair, the pain rushing through you.

“Fuck! Changbin, what the hell was that for?” You shouted rubbing your scalp.   “I was about to spill in your mouth,” He said as if he was doing you a favor.

“You could have just said so!”

“Shh!!” Changbin said covering your mouth with the hand that was previously tied up in your hair. You squinted your eyes at him, but then you heard the front door click and footsteps approaching Changbin’s open door.

“Hey Changbin, sorry for stopping by so late but could you do me a fav— holy shit!” Chan shouted covering his eyes and turning around. “Shit I— I’m so sorry!”

It would have been easy to hid what you were doing if it wasn’t for your face being so close to Changbin’s lap still and his dick hanging out.

“Chan, what the fuck!” You shouted throwing a pillow at him.

“What?! How was I suppose to know you were here?” He asked defensively, flinching from the pillow but still facing the opposite direction.

“Get out!”

“Yeah sorry, oh my god. I’m leaving, fuck this. You guys are crazy. You avoid each other like the plague one minute then I walk in on this.” Chan muttered to himself all the way to the front door.

You and Changbin stared at each other processing what the hell just happened. Well, what the hell just happened in it’s entirety.

“What the fuck..” Changbin said, cracking in to a smile first and laughing.

“What the fuck.” You echoed laughing harder, still in shock of your best friend walking in on you sucking a guy off.

But not just any guy,

You just sucked off Seo Changbin.

#seo changbin #changbin #skz #stray kids #changbin x reader #stray kids x reader #stray kids scenarios #changbin scenarios #seo changbin scenarios #skz scenarios #changbin smut #changbin imagines #seo changbin smut #skz smut #skz hard #nhie2 #nhie #myfic

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ohwhatamessiam · 6 years ago

Text

All or Nothing - Chapter 12

Summary: It’s been three years since she left him and Bucky is still trying to move on from their relationship. She survived his worst nightmare, but is it really over? And is there any hope for their relationship to begin again?

Pairing: Bucky Barnes X Bisexual!Reader, Bisexual!Reader X OC

Word Count: 4.7k+

Warnings: Language I’m sure. Alcohol to cope with awkward situations. Some feelings to top it off.

A/N: Hi everyone! I know it’s been literally 6 months since I’ve updated this story and I am so, so, very sorry. Work has been quite interesting (I’m in the midst of literal retail hell rn) and my writing inspiration has severely wavered, but I’m still trying guys. I think I got everyone tagged that I could, since it’s been forever since I last updated this story, and many of you have new urls. A huge thank you to @fangirlisms-22 for always using her free time to read whatever the hell I’m working on. Here’s the Spotify playlist for the entire fic. I love feedback, so send me your thoughts and feelings anytime!

The tag list is still open, so if you want to be added send me a message here!

This is the sequel to Give, so check out the first series here.

All or Nothing | Masterlist

The edge of my high heel tapped against the slick floors outside of Pepper Pott’s office. This was too big of an opportunity to pass up, but that didn’t stop me from being so nervous about it. I needed a job. I’d actually needed one since I’d finished healing. Since I’d stopped talking to anyone on the team but Wanda and Sam. Since Nikki and I had broken up.

A year had passed since I’d been in a building owned by Tony Stark, although I was pretty sure that Pepper actually owned all these buildings now. It was her company.

She knew about me, I knew she had to. The message she’d left me last week was too friendly for her to not know about me. Tony had to have told her what the team had done for me, and what I’d done to them.

I’d sent them on a year long mission to track down Ghost, and yet they still knew very little. There was no actual name for him, only a string of aliases he deserted after each use. He rarely met his employees or his clients in person, and when he did he always obscured his face or phased between corporeality and not. And his ability to hack was nearly unparalleled. Tony even hired better hackers than himself, and few could foil the guy. And when they did, it was only for a second before their computers tended to catch on fire.

What they had found was that he considered himself an activist. An anti-capitalist, targeting politicians and the government quite a bit. Which is why Tony and the Avengers had found themselves in his sights.

I’d been safe since Konstantin’s death. No one had bothered me back in Virginia, but my panic button still sat safely in my purse, clutched against my hip even today.

I glanced at my phone one last time and Pepper’s office door opened as my phone clock changed. Right on time.

“Hi (Y/N),” she smiled as she motioned for me to follow her through the frosty glass of her office. Pushing out of my seat, I tucked my purse under my arm and took a deep breath. I got this.

“Hello, Pepper,” I forced, trying make myself feel and look less stressed. I followed her into her spacious, minimalistic, and bright space. A full wall of her office was nothing but window, and for a moment I got caught on the fact that I could see almost all of Manhattan. She was on the 42nd floor, and although I’d never been afraid of heights, I could develop that phobia if I were to stay here too long.

I waited until she took a seat behind her glass desk, and the second I sunk into the plush chair across from her, I knew I’d never want to get up. Her hair was pinned back tightly, just more evidence of the tidy order by which she runs her life and her company. I almost laughed as I tried to imagine her and Tony having a shared living space. Him being so chaotic and her so organized. But then Tony probably paid people to keep his life together.

Pepper leaned her elbows on her desk as she watched me closely, her lips betraying the smallest smile. “Take some deep breaths, (Y/N). This is just a friendly interview, nothing too scary or serious.”

“Sorry,” I simpered. “I just really want this job.”

“Well luckily for you, you have some amazing references,” she winked and settled back in her seat. “So tell me why you want this so badly?”

“Uhh, the last year has been tough,” my eyes darted down to her desk, and barely caught the ring on her finger, but then tried to focus back on her face. “After what happened, after I missed all that work, my job was not waiting for me when I got back. It would be great to actually have a job that puts my skills to use.”

“That’s a good start.”

“And I’m not sure how involved the team would be with all this, but I don’t want to get this position from just my connections alone. I want my qualifications to speak for themselves.”

Pepper glanced toward the tablet on her desk that she had my resume pulled up on. “I knew you were qualified for this job before I even reached out to you. What I really wanted to talk to you about was how you feel about all this.”

“Oh, I’d be more than happy to take on this position.”

“But do you think you can separate the team from you needing to do your job?”

“I’d like to think I could, and as long as they’re not my direct clients, I stand by that. But I’m also completely aware that it’s a conflict of interest if they are my clients. They’re my friends and they’ve done so much for me. No matter how hard I’d try to be impartial and professional, I know I could never fully do that.”

Pepper’s controlled smile turned into a full grin. “And that’s exactly what I wanted to hear.” She closed out of my resume and stood up quickly. She reached across the desk to offer me her hand and panic shot through me. Did I just fuck this up? I took her hand as I got up, my pinched brows betraying my confusion.

“You’ve got the job.”

The team stepped off the quinjet, already peeling off their suits and hurrying to get a shower. It had been the first mission Tony had gone on in a while, and he was feeling a little rusty. He made a mental note to try to get Peter out of class next time something this last minute came up, and then he made an amendment to that note to only do it in a huge emergency.

Bucky pulled off his fingerless glove and popped open the snaps on his vest as he headed up the stairs. Tony jogged after him as the nanomites of his suit retreated to his watch. Tony’s fingers barely ghosted Bucky’s shoulder before he turned quickly, leveling Tony with a glare, “What Stark?”

“I uh, wanted to have a friendly chat,” Tony forced a smile, but it didn’t make it past his lips.

“We don’t do that,” Bucky answered, tilting his head to the side.

“You’re right,” Tony nodded and followed Bucky as he continued down the hall. “But I figured it’d be better for you to hear it from me, than to find out another way.”

“What is it?”

“So there was an opening within Stark Industries and Pepper needed it filled pretty quickly. After looking at several resumes that were-”

“Tony,” Bucky cut in.

“(Y/N) now works for Stark Industries.” Tony’s words made Bucky hesitate as he reached his door. “Her office is in Manhattan and she won’t be seeing any of you guys as part of her job, she’ll strictly be working with the Stark security team and the HR department, but as you know the security team often has individuals stationed here that don’t have to answer to the government or the UN.”

Barnes opened his door, keeping his back to Tony and he didn’t respond to his words. He stepped into his room but Tony stuck his hand out, catching the door before it closed. As eager as Barnes seemed to escape him, Tony still wasn’t done.

“We tried to figure out a way to keep her away from here for safety purposes, but I can’t promise that you’ll never see her around.”

Bucky’s fingers clenched around his door knob as he turned back to Tony, “Thank you for letting me know.”

He tried to yank the door closed but Tony pried it open again. He was never very good at being concise. “Also, we’re throwing her a welcome party at our penthouse in the city. The team will be attending, but I figured you might want to steer clear,” the way Bucky’s eyes bore into Tony’s made him nearly gulp, “or not.”

“Thanks,” Bucky answered as he forced the door closed.

Tony stood there for a second, stunned somehow by the coldness Bucky exhibited that barely hid his actual reaction. Tony had only seen Bucky this shaken once. When he’d found out (Y/N) was abducted last year. But maybe it was time for him to get used to a Bucky with more emotional range.

Bucky didn’t know how to process this. There were so many things swirling around in his chest. Happiness that she had a good job and would be closer to the team if she needed them. Trepidation because he might actually have to acknowledge her existence to the others. Fear that her being involved with the company would only continue to put her in harm’s way. Hope that he’d see her, even just in passing. Longing to do more than just see her. And the smallest tinge of anger that a year later, he still couldn’t promise her safety. And that maybe he never could.

It all bubbled up in him so rapidly that he actually had to reach out for the wall next to his door to keep himself stable. He’d tried so hard to bury all this. She’d been out of sight, out of mind.

He hadn’t said her name since right after she’d left a year ago. He hadn’t checked on her through the teams surveillance or connections. She’d even stopped frequenting his dreams. He was trying to move on.

He had actually gone on a couple dates a few months back. Of course Natasha had set it up, but it didn’t really go anywhere.

Sure, he hadn’t felt the same way about anyone else as he did her, and he was pretty sure he never would. But he’d made peace with that. After all the terrible things he’d done, it was okay if he couldn’t be with her. That only seemed fair.

But he didn’t know if he could see her around, just casually working, talking to Stark’s people. His ability to not think about her, think about how much he missed her, only worked if she was far away. Absent from his life, never close enough to see or talk to.

But that didn’t seem like a luxury he would have much longer.

The town car came to a stop at the end of the block, but I couldn’t force my fingers to move for the door handle. Of course Stark’s car service gave me no option, as the driver got out and opened the door for me.

His eyes caught mine and for a second, his professional facade dropped as he squatted in front of the door. “Need me to circle around the block a couple times?”

Would delaying this make it any less unnerving? Less uncomfortable?

Sure, these were my friends and acquaintances, but this whole night dedicated just to me getting hired felt weird and wrong. And no one knew that Nikki wouldn’t be coming. No one knew anything about my last year alone.

But putting this off or cancelling would only leave more questions for me to answer.

“No, but thank you,” I answered and he nodded. He pushed himself up and offered his hand to help me out of the backseat. I took it, using him to steady my steps as I tried to stand in my heels. I hadn’t worn a pair this high or this unsupportive in a long time. Match them with some restrictively tight undergarments to make sure my dress would be flattering, and walking had become near impossible.

The driver offered to help me into the building but I dropped his hand quickly. Of all the things I had to do tonight, walking in this outfit needed to be the easiest. But he stayed behind to make sure I got into the building alright.

After I pushed through the glass doors I looked back at him, letting him know I’d be okay. He gave me one last nod and finally walked back around the car. Another deep breath in, and I pressed the elevator button.

Would Bucky be here tonight? I knew Wanda and Sam were coming, they’d texted me congratulating me for getting the job and telling me how excited they were to see me tonight, but who else would be there. Obviously Pepper and Tony would be there, they were the hosts of this party, but would Steve bother? And would Nat show up? And if they did, wouldn’t they have told Bucky to stay away to make this easier for both of us?

The elevator binged as the doors opened, reminding me that I had somewhere to be. I stepped inside and immediately noticed the security cameras in the corners. As I pushed the penthouse button a woman’s voice spoke to me.

“We’ve been expecting you, (Y/N).” I pulled my hand back as the elevator doors closed and looked around the tiny space. “I didn’t mean to startle you, I’m F.R.I.D.A.Y. and I work for Mr. Stark.”

“Ohh-, okay.” I squeezed my hands together as I felt us ascend.

“Are you cold?” she asked. “I can warm the elevator up.”

“Uh, no,” I answered, noticing how my twitchy, clenched hands might give her that idea. “I’m just nervous. But I would take something to warm up my insides.”

“I do not have the ability to serve you a cocktail while you’re in this elevator, but I assure you there will be plenty of drinks at your destination.”

“Thank you,” I smiled. And I knew she was just AI, but I could imagine F.R.I.D.A.Y. smiling with me.

The elevator reached the penthouse as she left me with her last piece of advice, “Enjoy yourself tonight, (Y/N). This is a Stark party, and Tony loves a fun and inebriated time, you should try to as well.”

And with that, the doors slid open.

The open-concept space was a soft blue tone, and a gold banner that read “congratulations” hung from the ceiling. People were scattered around the room, seated on various couches and chairs. Sam jumped up first as I stepped out of the elevator. His warm smile greeted me as he yelled, “Congratulations!” and rushed to me. His long arms wrapped around me tightly, reminding me of his wings for only a moment.

Wanda approached us, but Sam’s arms continued squeezing me as he spoke into my ear, “I’ve missed you so much, (Y/N).” I hugged him back and he lifted me off the ground. My eyes grew wide with surprise as I made eye contact with Wanda. A smile graced her features and I knew she was doing her best not to laugh at me.

There was a group of people standing behind her, some I knew but several I didn’t, and I knew she caught onto the overwhelming anxiety running through me. Sam’s comfort might have kept me together outwardly, but my brain and heart were a different story.

Wanda reached out for a champagne flute as a caterer passed by and held it out to me. When Sam finally let my feet touch the ground, I patted him on the back and reached for her offering. Alcohol would hopefully make my brain quiet. She gave me a second to down it before her own arms wrapped around me. “I know this is the most attention you’ve had on you since last year, but I promise this room won’t be trying to cut you open or stitch you up.”

“Speak for yourself, I have a feeling some of these business people would love to do just that to me. And you know I would have been chugging champagne then if I hadn’t been on copious pain killers.”

Her laugh brushed my cheek as she pulled back, and I wished I could just stay locked into this private moment for another second. Wanda knew what I was thinking, what I was feeling. And she’d probably be the only person that night who understood what I was going through.

“It’s good to see you. And it’s even better that you’re in one piece now,” a woman’s voice snarked from behind me. Nat. She grabbed me before my fingers even left Wanda’s shoulders. Her hair covered my eyes and I pushed it away before I hugged her back. As I looked past our group, two familiar forms stood at the other side of the room.

Steve was one of them, his hands tucked in his pockets as he smiled at me, his head tilted forward in a greeting. The other sent a jolt through me.

Metal and flesh hands joined around a beer bottle, shoulders squared off, making himself tall. But his blue eyes met mine and then bounced away. Even after all this time away from each other, we still weren't at the place to pretend to be friendly. And god, how I wished we were already. It would make this night easier.

“Where’s Nikki?” Nat asked as she let me go.

I hesitated, not sure how they’d take this. Would they be happy I was single again? Would they try to push me back towards Bucky, if he was even still interested? Or would they try to play it off like it was nothing and tiptoe around the subject for the rest of the night? Or would Nat try to set me up with someone new, since she was well known for trying to play matchmaker.

“Oh uh, we… we broke up about a year ago.”

“What?” Sam asked, blinking as he stepped closer to me. “What did she do? Did she-”

“No Sam,” I shook my head and placed a hand on his arm. “It was mutual. We-, we weren’t the same people when we went back to Virginia as we were when we left.”

“I was really rooting for you two,” Nat cut in. “But sometimes it’s better to move on than stick around and be unhappy.”

A gentle hand rested on my shoulder and I immediately felt my mood perk up. It was Wanda, doing her best to keep me together. But she couldn’t stay attached to me the entire night.

“I’d really rather not talk about it tonight,” I managed a tight-lip smile. “I’m here to see you all and meet some of my new coworkers.”

“Then you’re gonna need another drink for that,” Wanda grinned. I nodded at her, and as she took her hand off me, every thing she’d suppressed came rushing back. My worry that this conversation about Nikki wasn’t over. Concern that this night would be a trainwreck, and that nobody would like me at Stark Industries. The fear that Bucky and I would get shoved together, and that I would only end up hurting him again. And the dread that maybe Bucky had moved past me. That maybe whatever part of me that still loved him, had always loved him, was just clinging to something I could never have.

I took one more deep breath as she handed me another drink, and then turned to the rest of the party with a forced smile.

“I’d like to make a toast,” Tony announced 30 minutes into the party. I’d barely made it through half of the Stark Industries’ representatives, and another drink. The crowd grew quiet though, and I was glad to turn away from the boring shop talk a couple of executives had roped me into. I didn’t even know what half of it meant, and I was pretty sure it wouldn’t be important to my position either.

“You’re all here because (Y/N Y/L/N) tonight. She’s the newest addition to the Stark Industries family.”

“It’s a company, not a family,” Pepper cut in, knowing Tony might have been talking to the Avengers team and not actually her employees. “But we encourage you all to get familiar with each other. (Y/N) will likely have to review or work with all of you eventually.”

“But tonight’s celebration isn’t just to congratulate her on her new position. It’s also to congratulate her on her regained safety.” My heart jumped into my throat, drying out my mouth as I desperately tried to swallow the discomfort.

“Last year (Y/N) was placed in harm’s way and got pretty banged up in the process. But tonight, I’m glad to announce that the person who harmed her is in custody.” Tony’s eyes held mine and he nodded at me, reacting to my wide eyes. “He’ll be put in the darkest cell imaginable, and won’t be able to hurt anyone ever again. So tonight is to new beginnings for her within the company, and to shutting the door on a traumatizing experience.”

“I can’t wait to see how (Y/N) flourishes at Stark Industries,” Pepper added, rerouting my congratulations speech. “And I have faith that she’ll bring nothing but support, innovation, and balance to us.”

The crowd turned to me, their hands clapping, their faces smiling, but I couldn’t hang on that. Ghost was in custody. Ghost was going to be in prison. I was supposed to be safe, but I felt everything but that. If he was in custody, that meant that he was closer to us than he had been in a year. He was close enough to hurt anyone of us in person.

I forced a smile until the applause died down, and then I headed for the bar. Maybe alcohol would dull this overwhelming dread in my gut.

I’d heard the rumors about what Ghost could do. He could be invisible, he could walk through walls. He was known for never being caught, and him suddenly being in custody? That didn’t feel right. Unless he wanted to be in custody. What could he do from inside? Who could he hurt?

I couldn’t handle anyone being hurt or killed because they went after him. Because they wouldn’t leave him alone after what he had done to me. I wasn’t worth the trouble.

The bartender placed a whiskey in front of me, my second of the night, and I gulped it down greedily. She noticed and poured me another before I had the chance to ask. As I nursed the third, my limbs grew heavier, the liquor was starting to work so much that I didn’t recognize the quiet “Hey” that came from my left.

I turned to him. His blue eyes focusing on the drink in my hand, still avoiding my eyes. His dark hair had grown out and was pulled into a tiny bun behind his head. And he was dressed nicer than I’d ever seen him. From across the room, I thought he was in jeans, but I was wrong. He had on a nice pair of wool pants and a white button-down dress shirt. But he was never a formal guy. His sleeves were rolled up to his elbows and he still had boots on, they just weren’t of the military variety. His metal hand held his own drink, an American brand beer.

“Hey,” I answered, the word coming out quiet and breathy. His eyes rose to mine, and whatever the alcohol had been dulling transformed into something even sharper. Heartbreak.

I thought we were okay. I thought we’d left things in a good place this time, but my heart hurt as I stared at him and he stared right back. It would have been easier if he was over me. It would have been easier if I’d lied and said Nikki couldn’t come tonight. But I hadn’t, and somehow he’d found out. There was the tiniest gleam of hope there. Hope that this might be our time.

But I couldn’t promise him that. And I didn’t know if I ever could again.

“Congratulations on the job. You deserve it,” he spoke, his voice low. He finally let my gaze go and looked back at his drink.

“I’m sorry that this-, this is how we’re having to do this. You shouldn’t have to see me at work. You shouldn’t have to talk to me at a Stark party. You don’t deserve that.”

His head turned quickly, a confused look pinching his brows, “What are you talking about?” That look pulled at my chest. He looked like my Bucky. But he wasn’t my Bucky, and he hadn’t been for a long time.

“I didn’t have to talk to you tonight. I didn’t have to come. Tony actually begged me not to. And Steve’s been offering to run interference so I wouldn’t have to talk to you for a week.” A soft chuckle curled his bottom lip. “I had to sick the kid on him to get him away from me.”

He moved to the side, revealing Peter excitedly talking to a politely interested Steve at the other end of the bar. I felt my own smile twist up my lips. And I saw his hope blossoming into something bigger.

“I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t want to be.”

“But why would you want to be here? I broke your heart. I left you.”

“I-, I know. But I can’t ignore you forever. We’ll have to see each other at HQ.”

“I figured we’d just keep it civil. Polite greetings in passing.” The alcohol may have stopped working on my emotions, but it certainly had loosened my mouth. I would have never admitted that to him before.

“I hope we can be more than just civil, (Y/N). It might, actually be nice if we could even be friends.”

After everything that had happened between us, could we be just that? Friends? I wasn’t sure, but I’d hoped we could try it out someday.

“I- I’d like that,” I nodded. We smiled at each other for a moment, and my own villainous hope started to bubble up too. I didn’t need to get his, or my own feelings built up to just get tore down again. I couldn’t do that to him again.

“(Y/N)! Congratulations!” a chipper voice whooped from behind me. It was Peter with Steve in tow, and I exchanged a private glance at Bucky. He rolled his eyes before turning to them. Steve still wasn’t giving up.

Peter threw his arms around me and squeezed me tightly. I’d met this boy once and I barely even knew anything about him, but that didn’t seem to matter to him. Plus, the overwhelming scent of liquor that came from mouth might have had something to do with his friendliness.

Steve’s hand came down on Peter’s shoulder, trying to reign him back in. He tugged him away from me and gave me a sympathetic shrug.

“I can’t wait to see you around more often! Maybe you’ll tell me about these guy’s personal lives, since they literally never tell me anything. But they know everything about me!” I couldn’t help but smile back at his goofy grin.

“You’re an open book Pete,” Steve cut in, trying to push Peter away from the bar. “It’s good to see you. And congratulations.”

Steve visibly struggled with forcing Peter to leave me alone, and he gave Bucky a panicked look. That soft, warm chuckle graced my ears again, nearly melting my insides.

“He’s a lot stronger than he looks,” Bucky added as he pushed out of his stool. I watched him use his metal arm to grab Peter’s other shoulder to force him forward. “I’ll see you around, (Y/N).”

“See ya,” I barely got out before Nat was sliding into the space Bucky had just left.

“Feeling a little fucked up yet? Because you absolutely should,” she asked as she ordered a refill of her cocktail.

“Ohh in more ways than one.” I glanced one last time over my shoulder at Bucky. A smile stretched across his face as he tried to get Peter away from the small dancefloor.

“I can’t help you with all of that, but I’ll make sure you get home safe.”

And she did.

After I finally got to thank Tony and Pepper for their kindness and generosity, Nat loaded us into a town car and took me back to my new apartment. Unsurprisingly, she knew my address better than I did. And while I didn’t remember asking her to spend the night, I woke up the next morning to her making pancakes in my kitchen, wearing a set of my pajamas that we’re way too big for her.

But even having her there only reduced the fear gnawing at me slightly.

Tags: @suz-123 @yo-yo-bro-bro @lostboyinneverland @irishdancr24 @honey-bee-holly @captainamericasbeautifulbutt @nedthegay @rosycheeksredfreckles @whatisanniedoin @sebastianst-n @hippiethor @idksolonya @purplekitten30 @chipilerendi @imagineanythingandeverything @buckybarnesappreciationsociety @thefridgeismybestie @metalarmlover @jillilama-blog @shifutheshihtzu @letsgetfuckingsuperwholocked @tequilavet @plan3tmadison @stanevansalways @justadesertrose22 @theresaskankinmyboot @renanyx @me221187 @iheartsebastianstan @capandbuck @wildefire @ssweet-empowerment @sophiealiice @imaginesofdreams @anotherawkwardaustralian @lostxsea @thisismysecrethappyplace

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a-story-teller · 7 years ago

Text

Lmao sooooo! My 18th birthday was a... I don’t take the Good Lord’s name in vain very often but God it was wild. I never thought I would say “last night was crazy” but last night was crazy. Much more under the cut. NSFW mentionings.

So I was at an anime/video game convention over the weekend, which ran from the 25th-27th. The con ran over my birthday (the 27th) and I quickly figured out since panels run late into the night, if I went to an 18+ panel past midnight on the Saturday schedule, it’d technically be the 27th and I could get in.

So we made a do of it! My brother and sister and I went to a “dating game” panel run by a midwest-centered burlesque group and I got in with no shit from the security man. We went and sat near the front and basically it was ye olde 3-people-on-one-side-of-a-tarp-answer-questions-from-one-person-on-the-other-side setup. The one person on the other side, though clearly a member of the burlesque, was unknown to the contestants, and they were also most often in costume.

We sit down. Things start. The announcer is in half a kigu and there are already sex jokes everywhere. They ask for their first contests, I raise my hand (the room was packed) and then yell “I just turned 18!” and the announcer’s like “then get your ass up here!” and then proceeds to gush over how cute me + my cosplay are. I’m contestant 2 and the questions start. I know myself well and I like to think I’m witty and by the time we’re nearing the end, I’m the crowd favorite. The whole thing is hilarious and I get chosen as the winner for this round! I come around the other side and the person is in a fucking sexy meowth cosplay lol and we hug and I get ushered backstage.

The prize is a free print of any burlesque member (send nudes lmao). But before I can get to the print table my path is blocked by two burlesque guys, one of whom is already shirtless - junkrat cosplay, no duh - and the other, a team Instinct Spark cosplayer, immediately lifts his shirt and goes “You wanna touch?” and like. Bruh. This guy’s abs are amazing. I mean like “he said Kylo Ren was shredded” amazing. And God help me there’s even a bit of a happy trail. But what’s a girl to do when handed beautiful abs on a silver platter? So I just press my hand to it and like absorb the power and maybe get extremely flustered. Then the junkrat’s like “don’t I get some?” and me, being stunned stupid, just poke this kid’s abs instead of properly appreciating them.

I bump around backstage watching the antics, sifting through large binders of nudes like it’s normal, standing next to a no-face cosplayer in high heels. I choose my picture - an artsy shot, only one tiddy out, able to be passed off as art reference should my mother ever find it. These are the things I think about. Everyone has been super duper nice and I head back to my seat with goods in hand, still reeling a bit from finding out what abs feel like, to chill with the sibs and laugh over all of it. We watch a bunch of the other rounds, the highlights of which include an extremely drunk contestant shaking her thong-clad bum at the crowd, telling everyone about how she’s been deprived by only having vanilla sex, and proceeding to invite up and snog, tongue included, a random woman from the audience; that no-face cosplayer slinkily pulling up the bottom of the skirt to reveal stockings and garters; and previously-mentioned Spark pulling down his pants to get “spanked” with the announcer’s flip-flop only to have her pull them off his butt, effectively mooning the audience. Remember, these are only the highlights.

I slip backstage to get my print signed and take the opportunity (what, at this point, did I have to lose) to be like “can I just...” and full-on splay my hand on junkrat’s tiny ripped abs. Because the poke was wasted and I was doing this right. We laughed and had a couple jokes - he was super chill, really in character, the voice and everything - then I got my print back and returned to my seat. A couple more rounds go by, it’s funny as hell, I feel like all this is extremely surreal and I’ve entered into a much more interesting liminal space.

The panel ends and I come up to the Meowth chick because, just letting you know, I’ve been tossing around the idea of doing burlesque myself and I wonder if she has some tips on getting started. She sits me down all mom-like (seriously this crew was so amazing, considerate, warm, and welcoming omg) and tells me how she started, how she thought was the best way to get into it, and how to apply for this group specifically. She aks me how old I am and I’m like “18″ and she’s all “you’re a baby!!! :)” and I’m like “yeah, legit, I Just turned 18.″ Oh boy. The look on her face. She just starts yelling to the others like “It’s her BIRTHDAY! She’s EIGHTEEN!” and another member’s like “Oh gosh, we’re going to give you a present. Tell Spark to get over here.” And y’all I’m saying I can see the end. The light at the end of the tunnel. I turn to my sister like “I think I’m getting a lap dance...” lmao I’m losing it. I’m straight up questioning what parallel universe I’ve fallen into where I’m hailed as Cute by a large crowd and I’m about to be grinded on by a man who is ridiculously cut and I am Not mentally prepared for whatever might happen. But sure enough I’m shown to backstage, given a lone chair, and sit down in it. By the maker if, after all this, I’m getting a lap dance, then I am not letting my embarrassed bitch ass make things weird.

But they tell me that if anything makes me uncomfortable to just say. I’m not going to describe the occurrence beyond three things: 1) upon seeing a short video clip after (no, not available for viewing sdklsadghgh) I realized it had been hella noisy the whole time but I’d been so preoccupied I had barely noticed there was Anyone else around 2) where the Fuck are you supposed to look? Eyes? Abs? At least the butt is safe and 3) How is simply bumping noses with someone Hot ???? asks a total virgin.

It ended and I was equal parts glad it was over and like got dammmmmn what the fuck man. I was pretty pink. Spark was totally peppy and cool as a cucumber, like, “Did you like it? I’ve been practicing!!” and I’m like, “Yeah, yeah, it was great!” and he just sort of goes, “Oh, I’m glad, you were very stoic and I wasn’t sure.” Brev. Why I gotta stress about e v e r y t h i n g. That’s called a poker face and it broke exactly Once, at which point I giggled and covered my mouth. But it was the abs. Again. Of course. If you ever need to know my kryptonite, apparently it’s impeccable abs.

But then I talked with the members a bit more, thanked everyone for the shower of special treatment, and we exited the panel room. I was Shook for the whole night, still am rn, and tbh the three things I left thinking were: 1) when you don’t drink you can Remember all the crazy shit that happens, not to mention stay in control of your behavior, I have no reason to Want to drink 2) people get paid to do stuff like stand and make jokes on a stage wearing a kigu, bra, and flip flops part of the time and spend the other part wearing nice costumes and lingerie and dancing, and I would like to be one of them 3) I Gotta get over this whole being jittery thing, me no likey.

But no it was Nuts in more ways than one and I swear this thing is the whole truth and nothing but the truth, despite how wack it sounds. Trust me, it was wack for me too. But it was a fantastic time, biggest deal I’ve ever had made for my birthday, and now I guess I won’t need a bachelorette party.

#personal #18th birthday #this just in: I may be a thot #'may' lmao #who am I kidding

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