#because that doesnt exist and if it did i wouldnt be on the good side uwu
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okay *cracks knuckles* I did a post about gale, time for his better half - astarion
Some of you don't have media literacy and it shows.
I dont know where to start so I'm gonna go hard before getting soft (insert sex joke.) Act 1 astarion is an asshole. He's manipulative and toxic and uses his power as a ~230 year old vampiric high elf to manipulate you into (among other things) having sex with him. I understand falling for him at that point, that's not your fault it's just the game gaming and the writers are really good at how they write his manipulation. However, it does strike me as strange that some of y'all get to the scene where he confesses to using and manipulating you and you....don't care? 'He's just damaged! its not his fault!' babygirl, someone can have a good reason for hurting you, but that doesn't take away the pain. I'm not saying that you shouldn't still love him, but it's strange how many of you disregard that scene. I know for me at least I was saddened by it and definitely was a little wary about him afterwards until beating Cazador and unlocking the nice happy healthy Astarion relationship.
Now here's where we get soft to prove that I actually like Astarion. The reason that confession stings for me is because I have many a memory of being SA'd then being told "I'm not even into you, you were just there." Ever since I stopped being a girl and became a woman, something that happened all too early in my life, I have been used and abused. And hey, sorry for making my Tav the exact same way but I like processing my trauma through D&D. I relate a lot to Astarion. Hurt people hurt people and I know that better than anyone. I also know better than anyone that picking yourself up and healing from that hurt sucks ass. Which brings me to two points. Um apologies for getting hard on you again.... insert another sex joke here.
1) Astarion isn't ace. I've seen this briefly and while I appreciate the need for queer rep, and love headcanons, I do think this discounts the struggle a lot of SA survivors go through. Okay, back to my life so we can compare. When I was chin deep in my abusive relationships and just general shitty time of my life, I was fucking and sucking literally so much it hurt. However as soon as I got out of that situation, I basically became celibate for 2 years. I didn't know how to have sex in a way that was healthy, or that wouldn't make me feel awful about myself. It was only this year that I was able to finally have sex in a way that made me happy. I think you'd be blind not to see Astarion in the same way. He's just a hurt man that is trying to rediscover and heal himself. Which is why he doesn't care about Tav and Halsin, and why you can have sex on his grave. He is very sexually open he just needs some time.
2) Ascended Astarion isn't sexy and I don't think some of you are ready for that conversation. Look I don't have time to go through this because I have a meeting in 30 minutes because I'm an adult with bad time management. But I just. Come here. Come real close. Abusive relationships aren't hot and sexy. We all love a little bit of kink but if you don't see Ascended Astarion as clearly the bad choice, I'm very confused. He's so sweet and loving and kind and HEALED if you don't let him ascend, I can't imagine not wanting that. And like I said, kink is fine! And ascending him because you're doing an evil run or whatever is also fine! Just please, I need teenagers to stop romanticising abuse because the media you consume does rub off on you.
TL;DR I love Astarion with all my heart, but by the writers own admission he was created as a Try Not To Overly Sexualise an Abuse Survivor Challenge and y'all are failing left and right!
#refusing to read this before posting because my cat sat on me and now im over stimulated#also ive been in love with neil as soon as i saw Gavin Reed breathe in dbh so im not better than anyone#it just saddens me i think bc it feels the same as ppl who sexualise my trauma#i also literally have a side blog dedicated to Billy Stranger Things so this isnt avout the good victim/bad victim thing#because that doesnt exist and if it did i wouldnt be on the good side uwu#anyway let me know what i missed or just scream at me to shut up lol#bg3#balders gate 3#astarion ancunin#astarion#tw: sa mention
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-vine boom
I probably sent a lot of these now im so sorry lmfao 😅
You mentioned in one of the asks that some countries are like a prototype/based of our existing countries, like Germany=Mondstadt, Liyue=China, Inzauma=Japan....
So even though the language is more or less identical for you to make heads and tails in a conversation or writing in a book, the reverse side does not.
Creator!Reader who knows a couple of languages (plus points if they're atleast fluent or have a understanding of it despite not being able to speak said language) and being born from a country that doesnt have the same language as the countries Teyvat based off. Basically Spanish, Italian, Filipino, Scandinavian languages that also have their own way of writing.
Imagine feeling homesick and the only thing that keeps you occupied is the notebook and pen you have while the others converse in a meeting or in a hangout. You started writing in your tongue and re-reading it to relive memories.
Zhongli, AlHaitham, Albedo, Jean, maybe the Berry bros too (Diluc & Kaeya) get curious only to have a double-take and immediately thinks that maybe there is a forgotten land in Teyvat that has this language, I mean Morax stayed faithful to Liyue and Barbatos blessed his country with abundance of supplies and freedom. Teyvat gods and archons played favourites, so why wouldn't you as well? (Bonus: Khaenriah flashbacks) (also I know these arent enough characters but how should I know? I only have a handful of them and I ran out of Primos😭
The people from Akademiya though? I mean they went hard on theorizing and picking apart the language of their creator. Have you seen Matpat's descent to insanity the more FNAF continues to push out LoRe? Thats basically them because Teyvat doesn't have a country based on Creator's birth country. They're grasping nothing but air and dead ends and the only lead they have is you, but couldnt ask because you look so down and they cant bear to see Creator sad....
(NEW BANNER TOMORROW AND I DONT HAVE ENOGH PRIMOGEMS HALP---)
Rip Vine boom no primos 🙏 hope u got some more by this time bc i was so late to reply lol - DUDE IM SO READY FOR THE GORG KAVEH <333
BERRY BROS!! Thats it, thats the only way im gonna refer to them now.
Not super long to add onto ur bc UR SO SMART AND SUCH A GOOD WRITER VINEBOOM U SHOULD ALSO WRITE STUFF SO I CAN GO OBSESS OVER UR WRITING WITH A MILLION FERAL COMMENTS-!!!
(Cute owl house gif is like, metaphorially u and zhongli in this lol)
EDIT 8/23/23: So this may be inaccurate/not that good to my Hispanic Readers out there! Sorry about that, I'l make sure to do better in the future.
EDIT 1/1/24: Unfortunately there are even more issues here, and I'm really sorry about that. I expanded on it more in my Eldritch fanfic post in Part 2, but it was exoticism of me to use the word "Huangdi". I have since replaced it with "Emperor", and don't intend to just erase the mistake like it never happened. But I did change it in the headcanons for better readability. Again, I'm genuninely sorry about this, and will absolutely be watching out/doing better in the future. I hope you understand.
THIS SOUNDS SO SAD, LIKE THIS COULD DEF BE ANGST, ESP SINCE U HAVE NO FAMILIAR-ISH CULTURE TO TURN TO-
tbh im american and i def dont think theres a u.s. country- oh god at least I hope not, damn but im also familiar with mexican culture so i wouldnt miss the united states, but id miss mexican culture…
BUT!!
You have a lot of amazing people who care about you in Teyvat, so they won’t let you stew in ur homesickness for long
like random said, i could see it being small stuff
ok so imma just-
LATINO! READER TIME BABBYYYYY
(i do this bc its just the culture/language im more familiar with, but dont let that discourage anyone from requesting other cultures! I will def do my research, or ur welcome to tell me all about it so i can write it better! <3)
THAT BEING SAID IM MOSTLY WHITE PLS LMK IF SHIT IS WRONG/SPANISH IS WRONG BC IM STILL A BEGINNER MY BELOVED LATINES!
<3 YOU GUYS
♡
you’ve been in the game-turned-life world of Genshin Impact for nearly 6 months now, turns out time isnt wonky as hell like it is if you were playing the game, half bc u bribed Albedo with answers to his many questions about you if he figured out the time difference, and half bc of ur internal clock
people would notice the cuss words first lmao
like Xiao hearing u stubbing ur toe on the million and one steps up to Wangshu Inn, hijueputa!
or Keqing pointing out the words you coo at the dogs hanging out by the bridge outside the harbor,
un perrito tan buenoooo!! :’)
while most would just, " hmm, maybe a dialect of one of the other countries we havent heard…"
but Zhongli? he’s been ready for centuries in case the prophecy came true within his lifetime, afterall, many things changed while he’s been alive, not crazy to him that you might descend randomly
While everyone else was unprepared, bc u were like… the oldest deity, more legend than history, so ppl just thought Morax was a little overly faithful …so when it actually happened,, Morax was just smirking as he watched ur golden shooting star streak the night sky… while absolute pandemonium consumed the mortals and adepti in liyue lmao
(like that scene of Regina George in Mean Girls watching the student body break out into an all out brawl just smirking 😭 pls god look it up if u dont know what i mean- )
So Morax- Zhongli, has been ready for you, just in case, to pay attention to what kind of person you’d be, learn your favorite clothes/colors/offerings, see what things you’d like to talk about with him (hopefully for hours) etc.
He was observant, and with his memory, he practically gave himself headaches sometimes with how aware he was,
on one of those days he was overwhelmed by the mortal crowds, the smells, the market yelling, and all the change from what he thought he knew-
Zhongli noticed you in your own melancholy, and curious, he began to stroll just behind
You sit at Wanmin restaurant, still somber, and ask Xiangling to
“please try out these recipes? they’re from my world, and id really love to have something like them again..”
a true experimental chef as always, Xiangling quickly takes up your offer, and u follow her into the kitchens in the back (the restaurant is much more real than in game, they have gorgeous inside seating, all shades of red coloring the walls and lots of pretty latticework-)
Zhongli takes a seat finally, he has a usual table at this point he comes in so much coughtorunintoyoucough the staff know it's his and give him tea pretty quickly
the food, and the looks, makes it your favorite restaurant in Liyue, the Liuli Pavilion a little too fancy for casual dining, afterall, Zhongli would know
He’s tried to keep track of your favorite places to be in Liyue too, and kept his near full attention on what you say when he asks after your stays in Liyue (he hasn’t felt the need to pay that much attention or felt that much interest in conversation partners in… decades?)
So when you come out of the kitchen, throwing your head back and laughing, "Sí, sí! It all tastes so close Xiangling! Gracias, thank you!"
He wants… to know.
to know what those strange, but delicious looking, foods are all balanced on two big dinner plates
Xiangling carrying whatever you couldn’t just behind, a pitcher of white liquid, it smells, like cinnamon?
He raises a hand, and offers the extra seats at his table, (when did his tea go cold? he only just sat down, he couldn’t have spent that long thinking about you…)
You notice and look over, a giddy grin lighting up your face (…hmm, perhaps he needs to transform into his Exuvia form and let off some steam, his chest has warmed too much right now for him to just be sitting here…)
You plop into the seat beside him, but not before carefully placing the plates in front of both you and Zhongli
You scootch around until you’re turned towards him, as always, Zhongli looks… actually kind of, happy?
a small soft smile pulls at his lips, his eyes half-lidded as they meet yours, his usual red eyeliner framing his monolids perfectly, he looks like he’s been,, well, sculpted from stone, an artwork come to life
“…My Emperor? Could I trouble you to tell me about the dishes before us?”
the geo god’s pleasantly smooth and deep voice felt so soft asking you that, like he didn’t want to push you one direction or the other
“Oh! Right! Sorry, these are from my home country, back in my world, or at least, as close as Xiangling and I can get to them!”
Your smile brightens your face once more, clearing away any leftover stormclouds from your mood earlier, and as you launch into explaining (Xiangling had to get back to orders, so it’s just you two now)
You list it all, the quintessential: quesadillas, empanadas, tamales, chorizo (you had to combine at least 5 different spices to Mondstadt sausages to get anywhere close to the real thing) the dips obviously, salsa, queso, guacamole, and the easy street tacos, and finally the horchata, but also all the weird fruits Teyvat has with chile, like Sunsettias mixed with Harra from Sumeru or Lavender melons with Wolfhook berries… all surpringly pretty good
(the Sun-Harra combo tastes like mango, a sort of deeper taste of pineapple/kiwi and a sort of light orange taste? all with the nice addition of chile flavors, the Lavender melons and Wolfhooks helped imitate chamoy enough that your heart was satisfied)
…you realize you’ve just been talking about the last meal you had with your family/friends instead of the food after a bit, and Zhongli hasn’t said anything…
you trail off and look back over your shoulder (u were practically about to get your shirt in the imitation guac u were leaning so far over the table to point and talk)
you’re about to sheepishly apologize for taking over the conversation, and ask if he wants to try anything (Zhongli can handle spice so u dont have to worry abt that at least)
but as u finally see his face, u just stop, and dont end up saying anything
He’s just, looking at you.
his smile's not huge, but big enough to make his eyes look happy, and Zhongli’s just… looking at you.
You can’t describe the look he’s giving you, but you suddenly feel… a wave of shyness wash over your heart in your chest, because he’s looking almost like, maybe like, he’s sort of, waiting for you to keep talking, his tan skin warm in the golden rays of the sun beginning to set, you don’t know why you’re noticing any of these things, and he gently, slowly, makes a move to lean into your space a little
almost above your armrest, head inches from your shoulder, he finally moves to stop looking at you-
He looks like a painting as he looks down, his eyelashes almost sitting on his high cheekbones,
you have to move your head to looking at the table too as he moved so close,
you feel your shoulders reflexitively hitch upwards as you brushed the hair on the side of his head as you turned away
He looks around, and then moves his head, not his body, he’s still leaning toward you, to look you right in the eyes again
“Why did you stop? I haven’t said much, I apologize, but it’s only because I wanted to hear you without anything interrupting you.”
You cough a little strained, “Oh! Oh I get it now yeah, thanks-”
“I want to hear you more,” his black eyes begin to warm with gold, you can vaguely see the shape of his diamond pupil revealing itself, “I want to hear about… everything, if you’ll tell me? The language, the food, the drinks, your family, your dances, your country, I want to hear it all. Won’t you please let me hear your voice some more?”
♡
GOOOD LOOORDDDD, ITS SO LONGGGGG IM SO SORRRYYY 😭😭
OKAY IM MOSTLY SORRY THAT THIS SCENARIO HAPPENED??? IDK WHERE ZHONGLI CAME FROM- GOD IM SUBCONCIOUSLY IN LOVE WITH THAT MAN I GUESS, SORRY RANDOMANTICS-
uh, hope somebody got anything out of this, sorry abt the length, again,
also pls somebody tell me if what i said about culture/food was alright! If not I’ll def change it, pls dont let me keep it up if its inaccurate/wrong!!
Safe Travels you guys,
💀♒️
.°•.☆.•°.
♡ the beloveds ♡
@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk
#fuck my tags ♡#im so tired of putting them#idk why but my heads emptied of all i need to put <3#UR HAVE SUCH GREAT IDEAS RANDOM!!!#i meant what i said before the gif!#genshin impact#genshin sagau#ask box open#sagau#my asks#genshin imagines#gender neutral reader#genshin isekai#genshin god reader#zhongli imagines#zhongli x reader#genshin impact sagau
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Hello hello! :) I’m here for our matchup trade for Black Butler! (I sent the pictures for the Paparazzi end :) )
Starting off I am a neurodivergent, queer (but attracted to masculinity) female. I go by she/they and im an INFP Sagittarius.
Physically, I am a 5’2” but wear platform converse or boots every day of my life. Style wise, im definitely alternative. However, Im also a fan of the baggy jeans, tight top, kinda side of grunge. Im also a sucker for black with pastels, so I suppose my color pallete would fall under “Pastel Goth” or something similar. I actually really love the style called “Morute” which stands for “Morbidly Cute”. I just absolutely adore the creepy-cute combination, and i aspire to look like a creepy doll somedays.
That also would lead into hobbies, as I love dolls! I collect them and will gush over them any time i see one in public i like. Especially going to cons and seeing the little stands with BJD dolls? I go feral-...and broke. My entire room is decorated in pretty dolls, anime figures, manga, and cherry blossom vines. (I really want a cherry blossom tattoo on my back but im terrified of needles-) My other hobbies include writing, skateboarding, singing/making music, and dancing! I have a band with friends right now. I’m training my voice to be a metal singer despite having a feminine voice, so im a bit shy with it right now.
Personality wise, I suppose it tends to fluctuate, but i think what sticks the most is that I'm extremely sweet and loyal. I used to be very shy, and can even be pretty quiet nowadays too. Im definitely introverted but, ive gotten much better with it. Friends would definitely say that im bubbly, always trying to laugh. Definitely witty too because I absolutely love bantering and softly bullying people. Id say im very emotionally intelligent when it comes to other people. Im definitely a realist, and im told im very good with advice and empathizing with people. I feel i understand other emotions more than mine sometimes. Which annoys me- Because I have a habit of not expressing anything negative. I think it might be due to past trauma, but I have a hard time staying angry or upset with people. Its like- once you screw me over, i have no issues getting rid of you. I dont like that i can easily disconnect from people, as I feel it makes me sound like a bad person, but I just feel l like if i know my worth, and someone isnt treating me as they should, I shouldnt keep them in my life. That does go to say though, that I am an all or nothing person with people I care about. If i am your friend, I trust you can come to me with anything and I vice versa no matter what. I always come through and i expect the same.
Another bad habit though would be disappearing. I wouldnt call it ghosting because I always pop back up, but I usually dont respond or see people for weeks or even months, even close friends. Most that are close know that if they need to talk to me, they have to double text or call me. Ill always answer then. I dont mean to, I just for some reason am really consistent with randomly dropping off the face of the earth for everyone but my partner, or person closest. Texts are always paragraphs though! Im not a dry texter, just forget I exist and have to respond :) Not to mention, i have ran away out of state before just for the sake of going and exploring. (Did a lot of Urbex and trespassing- it was fun but i dont think ill ever go to abandon buildings like that again. That doesnt mean ill stop climbing trains though!) I just love road trips and little late night adventures.
Some notes about me… Id say my fears involve needles, the dark (I sleep with a nightlight but love horror-), Clowns, and deep water. I cannot swim and have nearly drowned before so I actually hate going swimming. I dont see the appeal and start to panic if i cant see or touch the bottom. I wouldnt say im scared of spiders though like most. I actually am the person my job calls for to grab spiders and take them outside. If theyre cute, ill just grab them with my hand. Another thing is that I have OCD and PTSD. My OCD isnt the typical stereotype of being clean, Im just very routine with patterns. The person im with has to be okay with frequent alarms I set for different time frames, my strange eating habits (I cant have anything touching, one food at a time, soft foods over crunchy, and i absolutely love bananas but cant eat them unless someone peels them for me while im not looking) I also get very paranoid about certain things, like for example, i get little episodes sometimes where I freak out because I believe Ill inherent my dads schizophrenia and Ill because dissociated with reality, so whoever im with needs to be able to help assure me i wont just lose my mind- That being said, my least favorite love language is touch! I can be touched, but its very easy to overwhelm my due to past trauma. I also flinch very easily without even thinking and it gets annoying when people make fun of it. Because of this as well, im a very silent walker and tend to scare people because i subconsciously make myself as unnoticeable as possible. Im also an insomniac. I will not go to bed until the sun is up, and even then I wake up very easily. My doctor keeps trying to give me medications for it so i can sleep better, but its so ironic because I stop taking them constantly because I hate feeling tired. SO someone who doesnt mind being up a bit late would be appreciated :)
Random facts are: I absolutely adore raccoons and rats, and used to be a rat mom! I’ll spit out little rodent facts like im google. I know morse code. Im an amazing driver. I will get you there fast and safe….fast as in i max out my car frequently and if i get one more traffic misconduct i lose my license. BUT i know how to be safe with taking those risks, if that makes sense? Like i know where and when to speed and when not to- Most people fear getting in the car with me. But other than that, i think that’s it for now! Thank you <3
Hello!<3 @xxchthonicreaturexx
I apologize for any mistakes! English is not my native language and I'm new to writing:) Written in "you" perspective
possible tw - talk of mental health, mentions of unhealthy relationship ig? idk how healthy grim reapers r, mentions of drowning and suicide
barely proofread
To start, you're gorg and going off of everything I think your Black Butler match would be..
Undertaker !!
Both visually and personality wise I think you would compliment each-other! In my opinion your energies have something similar.
visual
I think Undertaker would like your piercings, he has an industrial himself.
small head cannons
You both have black nail polish, so painting each others nails as a cute activity:)
Doing each others eyeliner/make up.
classic
Undertakers mbti type most likely is ISTJ while yours is INFP. While your compatibility can seem difficult at first, by appreciating each others differences you "balance" each other out.
Sagittarius and Aquarius are an energetic match, being air and fire signs your elements fit seamlessly. In astrology, air feeds fire.
"i can easily disconnect from people"
Is a trait both of your star signs posses, a similarity that needs to be balanced between the two of you.
In terms of style I can see you in lots of similar/ partner outfits, as your style is somewhat similar too. Undertaker would, just like you, adore pastel goth and a creepy cute, dolly like aesthetic, - not on him but most definitely on his partner.
I think Undertaker would definitely share your love for dolls, acquiring many dolls and gifting them to you.
As we can see in the Luxury Liner arc, I'd say he has his own love for "dolls", if you know what I'm saying.
As for your other hobbies I think Undertaker wouldn't exactly share your interest in them, but he'd definitely support you. Ex. Watching your band perform, making tea to soothe your voice after you've practiced. He'd definitely be one to annoy and tease you in a joking manner, while you're writing or doing other things.
You being more calm/quiet and Undertakers more energetic and chaotic certainly harmonize. You'd participate in a lot of witty banter and Undertakers life mission would be to make you laugh all the time. He'd adore your sweetness and bubbly-ness (is that even a word??) and your loyalty would be VERY important to him. While he acts and is mostly carefree, I think deep down he still wary of deep connections with people, as he doesn't really have friends.
When he achieves said connection tho he might not always act like it but he'd be sort of possessive. Wouldn't let you get very close to Sebastian or Ciel out of a fear, that they would use you against him in some way. It takes a while for him to tell you what he is, it takes him a while to trust someone 100% wouldn't talk about how it happened tho.
I think arguments wouldn't happen very often, when they do tho they would happen out of Undertakers disregard for "human customs", ex. relationships with other people, etc. Undertaker doesn't resort to screaming, he wouldn't even comprehend that you're mad or annoyed with him. After a few days of not talking much he'd try and talk, bring you something, dolls, sweets, whatever. Makes you sit down and explain what's bothering you, wouldn't always get it but he'd try. Makes up by gifting you dolls or figurines.
Would get worried the first few times you disappear, always manages to find you tho. Absolutely goes exploring with you, might not say it but part of the reason why, is because he's worried about you.
Teases you about your fear of the dark, always lights a candle for you at night tho. Undertaker has died through drowning, as shown in a manga panel, so he shares your fear of water. It serves as a constant reminder for him, so you both don't see the appeal.
Might sound weird but he's fascinated with your OCD habits, he asks you about them. Once you explained them, he always makes sure that your food is arranged the way you like it and peels your bananas for you. Doesn't mind the alarms you set, can be your personal alarm clock actually.
Undertaker has dealt with a lot throughout his long life, he has his own problems. He will always assure you that you're going to be okay. Another thing, that might seem insensitive but sometimes he'd joke that you'll be "crazy" together.
Undertaker's very touchy by nature, I would say. After noticing you flinch, he'd be unsure if his presence and being a grim reaper still intimidates you in some way, if he decides talking to you about it, Undertaker will resort to gift giving and quality time.
Being a quiet walker doesn't matter with Undertaker, as he senses your presence, he isn't human after all, or easy to startle.
Grim Reapers require both sleep and sustenance, but have you seen Undertaker? That man runs on two hours of sleep maximum, he also definitely wouldn't mind staying up late. Dancing late at night, while nobody is watching, is definitely a reoccurring activity in a relationship with the Undertaker. He can be a bit overbearing at times.
Depending what century you're imagining this in, Undertaker loves when you drive, it's sort of an adrenaline rush for him.
head canons
-
Doing each others makeup, sitting on a coffin or your bed. "You have to be still, for me not to smudge the eyeliner!!", while he tries to tickle or smooch you.
_
Painting each others nails and making a cute date night out of it, lots of candles around you for the atmosphere. Playful banter, which ends in you two cuddling in a coffin.
-
Going out to explore the woods, him following closely behind you, suddenly disappearing just to appear in front of you, scaring you in the process, making Undertaker burst out laughing. Holding out a hand to help you climb onto things.
-
Exploring the city at night, when the people are sleeping and the bustling and usually loud streets of London are completely empty. Even jumping roof to roof. (This reminded me of that one Howl's moving castle scene. 01:47-02:10 in the linked video)
-
Late at night, while both of you aren't sleeping, Undertakers shop is dark, except for the dozens of candles littered across the room, as a music box starts playing a soft melody. Undertaker coming up behind you and offering you a hand, as you start dancing across his shop, moving through the space together, occasionally stepping on each others feet and giggling.
Again, it's my first time writing and English isn't my first language. I hope you could still enjoy this<3
#divider by v6que#undertaker#undertaker black butler#undertaker x reader#undertaker kuroshitsuji#romance#romantic#romantic matchup#match#matchups#english isnt my first language
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re: your post about xerxes' innocence and optimism being seen as flaws or almost made into a joke. i think both the outside knowledge that asmodeus is a lying opportunist the internet's borderline hero worship of brennan also adds to this; they believe xerxes is meant to be /punished/ for being stupid and selfish enough to trust a devil.
i think you've hit the target pretty well, anon.
i do want to clarify i dont think zerxus is "innocent" in nature about the gods. he knew who asmodeus was; he read about him often, feeling kinship. but i think that speaks to how fundamentally empathetic zerxus is that he turned his anguish over being lonely, isolated from his son, his husband, even his own party, and turned that to feeling almost.... kindness. and it came pouring out, all these feelings of projection and wishing to care for someone again, onto asmodeus. i deeply sympathize on that front; he wants to believe that anyone can be saved because he doesnt know how to fix himself and the broken pieces of his life. is that arrogance, to seek some shred of kindness to prove that it exists?
what bothers me is labeling zerxus arrogant (and all the other traits people detest him for) came from asmodeus's mouth. at the time, the fanbase would not trust a word he said - not his canon past with divine family, not his anguish over losing that family, nothing that zerxus saw and empathized with - but they did all think asmodeus wasnt lying when he said zerxus was arrogant. when what is significant about asmo calling him that is hes projecting as much as zerx is. and the thing is, in canon we know zerxus's belief isn't fruitless (and i think asmodeus knows it deep down too). we know the gods struggle with emotion as much as mortals do (see literally the same scene, zerxus saying asmo hates so purely because he hates himself and asmo biting his lip in fury knowing he cant respond back without proving him right), and can even be swayed to listen (asmodeus is having to help the other gods and mortals right now). we know folk like jester who saw kindness where there genuinely wasnt and still managed to help others find it anyway. it was simply the wrong place at the wrong time. it was the age of arcanum. it was cruel. and zerxus's flaws, while fascinating and many, were not hubris or arrogance. id say his fatal move was being blinded by love that was marred by projection, and he could not see (between his low intelligence score and his desperation) how his love specifically was so important to be weaponized.
as for the brennan point, i do enjoy his dm'ing, but any time he dms for cr you can feel people act like hes here to.... punish? straighten out the kinks? especially right now. somehow fans expect a man they obsess over being a leftist to justify aeorian genocide, "fix" matt & aabria's very long standing interpretations of gods as complex individuals who canonically colonized exandria in such a way that even mortals call it out. i think a large part of that is why they interpreted zerx as "arrogant terrible man righteously suffers under his choices". but.... even brennan gave zerx a chance because he chose to unwaveringly redeem. even he said that his love & hope was not wrong. luis likes & replies kindly to posts on twitter about people who relate to zerxus for being manipulated & abused for choosing to love. matt has said asmodeus is so aware of how fundamentally good zerxus is that he wont let him leave his side. you may choose to read brennan's interpretation of the devil as a christian one punishing sinners, but cr wouldnt be cr if every story did not come down to unending hope & empathy & belief in others even if it took a thousand years for it to come to fruition. and brennan is part of the enduring of that idea.
#thank you anon#wanted to write about that for a long while but was very sure id be dogpiled#long post#asks#van speaks#critical role#critical role meta#asmodeus#zerxus ilerez#exandria unlimited: calamity
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(soo ignition teaser thoughts ig)
hmmmm im ngl the trailer itself as a like prelude to what is coming in 5.0 intrigue and plot wise is like. compared to the region teasers that came before w lazzo and overture. its just. its kinda bad im sorry KWKJKWDJKWDJK like okay cool seeing the new cast and production value is high as always (+ music) but its such a middling teaser for the story itself?? it feels like a powerpoint presentation of the cast more than anything narratively coherent with an inherent draw and mystery
like theres mavuika speaking to the flame thingy (xbalanque that u? "one entombed in the primal fire" perhaps????) with some intrigue i suppose as well as her brief thing w capitano. ororon also appearing to be working together or aligned with capitano given theyre standing together there which could make for an interesting plot thread but beyond that its very.... eh. its not giving us a lot to grip onto ya know???? and thats rly a shame especially since i also felt that way abt the teaser in the 4.8 livestream. i wish we got more
and sure theres a tournament wahoo but like. its really Not helping to hype up that thing when half the introduced cast isnt being like "OMG the tournament!!!!1!1 this is HUGE!!!1" (or even. "oh no this is BAD!!!1" to set up basic conflict. like why would they dread it?) but instead just. "oh right... the tournament 🙄🙄" like who thought that was a good idea 😭😭 if the PEOPLE of natlan dgaf abt the big plot event happening then how am i as the viewer supposed to feel majorly invested in it . wow theyre tossing a ball around . wow nobody wants it guess ur tournament is having a bit of a PR issue in the making mavuika lmao
anyway i wouldnt even call myself a true capitano glazer despite being a fatuiHQ enjoyer on the side but like. that hmph still carried welcome capHIMpeaktano truly o7 JWDJWDJKDWJK also did yall see the. anemo-ish turquoise flare when mavuika is confronting (?) him? wonder if thats a thing with her flames or is it implying cap as anemo or sth.... i think itd fit him decent enough but ya. looking forward to HIM for sure
(+ congrats to him for losing the goofy timbs from arles animated short lmao like his design looks so fucking sick now)
character design wise uhhhh. well theres the obvious huge fucking issue here and while id say that hoyo p much already showed their true colors on the matter with sumeru that doesnt rly. make it any less disappointing and egregious wrt all the cultures and peoples theyre So willing to gather inspiration from in all possible aspects Other than the diversity of the people themselves. like its just... bad and such a shame but also not very surprising unfortunately.
(and really it just. looks especially bad given they clearly Can put melanin on people its just... enemy mobs only.)
beyond that i kind of dont have anyone that super catches my eye rn??? mainly because . well leaks moment eek but its basically official info now so basically. xilonens existence as a geo and a 5* (which like . u dont need leaks to guess she will be im sorry jdwjdw) was leaked a bit ago as well as the patch she should appear meaning. im actually in chiori rerun savings mode since its very high chance that she will be back w xilonen if anyone. so thats my plan for now kjdwjkdwjkdwjk
in terms of the actual cast i do like kinich and ororons designs v much, the design motifs of the latter especially are interesting bc those eye-like patterns are almost giving quantum symbol (= black hole imagery) to me???? and thats V interesting especially if hes actually working w capitano and the fatui. now him being a cat boy or whatever animals ears those turn out to be isnt like sth thats huge for Me personally but i do think hes valid and also W for anyone whos into that, congrats guys im happy for u ! but like fr itd be such an insane twist if hoyos Finally introducing the void quantum abyss whatever element w him (and maybe cap too.) bc that symbol Rly is looking Curious. or then hes just electro lol. for kinich its like. yeah fair he might be xiao-tighnari-gaming from minecraft ill admit that but. i do like the color scheme and his outfit a lot JKWJKDJKDWJKD so like i forgive it
w the girlies i overall find them all like. quite nice but so far without any personality + lore known its hard to settle my complete thoughts on them just yet. tho citlali being pink is super refreshing for genshin since we do have a shocking absence of it so like shes definitely one im drawn to, chasca looks interesting and like she could play a bigger part plot wise (maybe?) so that might be neat. both her and citlali being cryo is kinda surprising?? but cool. maybe ill get to unbench my shenhe and play some cryo teams again lmao freeze has been dead in abyss for so long now....
xilonen again w the kemomimi isnt sth im particularly into or not into but she looks cool, depending on personality and how her kit synergies turn out (+ assuming the chiori rerun, the fate of those pulls too), i might try for her as well? theres an Energy to her i like it. if she has proper Attitude and flair thats gonna be a massive bonus for me
mualani i think is rather bland to me, sth about her outfit and design just doesnt click for me even if the shark thing from the teaser before is neat and everything. the chibis are never sth im actively drawn to but like both do look okay, im kinda hoping kachina could be a lynette moment for 5.x and end up a free 4* since her exploration roomba looks p fun
anyway then theres. mavuika and i. well at least the design wasnt. That concept art one (ThoseWhoKnow...) . so instant massive W improvement solely on that basis holy fucking shit but ehhhhh im sorry i still dont know how to feel abt the very modern like. biker bodysuit thingy. im not a huge fan of the bodysuit type designs anyway so its not that surprising but still. her eyes + hair is absolutely stunning tho like not a question at all.
tbh in a way i kinda feel like having too many Thoughts on her design is kinda just unnecessary bc like. shes the archon. of Course the kit is going to be insane so i will get her anyway (UNLESS a pyro onfielder JKWJKJKWJKWJKWFKJ like god please no). and in terms of like is her design and energy from what this vid is giving us good enough that i wont like. Actively resent having to get her for meta and strong teams??? Absolutely. so in that sense ig its all cool lmao
but yeah. idk i just think as a teaser for the upcoming story its rly a shame how weak this felt for me???? like sure overture ended up being a bit of a misleading teaser since it gave the impression of arle as this mastermind of the fontaine AQ which didnt rly happen but it still served as a source of hype and intrigue. and yes lazzo is sth that can Never rly be beat in terms of how out of nowhere it was and how fucking insane the whole harbinger reveal went (+ elogia cinerosa existing) for lore and long term hype but its just. unfortunately those 2 are the regional teasers this natlan one is supposedly meant to parallel and it just didnt deliver anything comparable to those for me
like still looking forward to natlan and seeing the rest of its cast (like im fairly convinced the flame thingy might be xbalanque and hes gonna be a big deal ultimately or sth) and where it goes and all its environments but this trailer didnt rly. grip me the way i wouldve expected it to. which is unfortunate kdjkdwjkwjkdwj but yea thats all
#also i guess a thing i kinda feel mixed on and have seen ppl feel similarly abt in terms of the chara designs as a whole#is just the kinda. more modern design direction thing. from the biker suit to xilonens shorts being This close 2 looking like ripped denim#and other stuff. like idk its hard to pinpoint but it just feels v different from other genshin designs and while different doesnt equal ba#for now its not sth i have rly gotten used to ig#so the characters arent appealing as much as they could for now at least .#but yeah. i dont think i have like any insane hype going forward for now but im reasonably excited for sure.#and the environments are obviously guaranteed to be stunning as well as the music#genshin#rambles
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how would u fix the show!
thank you for this completely unprompted question
okay so first i would literally Start w harrow and viren killing thunder the dragon. because that is the inciting incident. of the show. like throw out all the exposition and Show us the conflict between humans and elves. that s3 flashback scene could work as an introduction scene with some tweaking. harrow kills the dragon and hes like yayyy revenge but then viren pushes. the first thing viren should do on screen is manipulate his best friend into doing something terrible. prologue over.
skip a few days forward whateverrr introduce the princes. flesh our their relationship w their dad. maybe the first thing he does when he gets back from his Murder is tell them he did it for their mother. maybe he's acting a bit different now a bit distant. but the relationship between harrow and his sons should be like. actually thematically important? instead of. not.
harrow tries to shield his sons from the truth of what he did he tries to be the same man but theres a hint of that, my god what have i done? he did something terrible and bold. have his people be like. happy their queen is avenged but also like. expecting retaliation. compare killing thunder to humans first learning dark magic. great power heavy price. viren being like literallyyyy dont worry about it. elf racist. god i would make viren so elf racist but couch it in like. he wants what was taken from them -- positions himself as the avenger of humanity the way harrow avenged sarai. what we're doing is right. they started this. etc etc. dont make all the adult characters so fucking stupid and useless. have harrow face some friction from his advisors/councilors. but he's still the king. oh and throw in his notions of wanting to be a fair + just king. how do his actions fit into that childish dream? they dont. facing his flaws.
anyways okay all that happens. one, two episodes max we get to know the human side of the conflict. and thennn stinger for the end of that first arc is well. elves r done being sad its time to get revengeeee. instead of a group assassination, its just rayla and runaan. two person team bc strength isnt in numbers its a stealth mission. sneak in slaughter their targets get back. an eye for an eye. give rayla that motivation of wanting to avenge her cowardly parents/their failure. runaan being like this isnt a childs game this is for serious. and rayla being like yeah im not a kid + wanting to prove herself too. okay two man team we can still throw in rayla being unable to kill one guy. and that kinda ruins the mission. now theres tension. who do you root for? no ones doing the right thing. theyre all being terrible.
and then maybe the princes have a fight w their father their king. callum not wanting to seem ungrateful for all he's been given but ezran thinking what his father did was wrong. see he doesnt have that connection w his mother he was a baby when she died. but still being his mother's son and like she wouldnt have wanted you to do that. in the binary world of good and evil that exists in a ten year old's head, killing someone for something as abstract as revenge is evil. especially if you develop his bond w animals over humans.
okay so major turning point. rayla still sneaks into the palace alone runaan breaks away. the princes can still run away w her -- ezran being the one whos like. our dad did something wrong and i want to fix it. callum coming along to protect his brother. they leave Knowing how its going to destroy their father but that relationships tainted now. hes not the man they thought he was. but theyre going to go to the elves and prove that not all humans are bad. woefully childish dream, like wanting to be a good and just king.
anyways ok so the princes disappear. runaan fails and gets captured. viren realizes the egg is gone and who likely took it. urges harrow to find them bc he wants his prize back. he has plans. harow being like yeah obvs im sending my best to get my boys back.
okay and then you knowww. but big thing for me. for ME. is developing the fallout between viren and harrow because viren Wants the war. he needs the war. he needs to prove he is special and right. and harrow realizing he made a mistake. he chose death over life. becoming increasingly desperate to get his sons back. but at the end of it, he decides against escalation. he trusts his boys. he trusts their dreams.
and THERE. there. viren betrays him. harrow is going to do the right thing and viren wont allow him to be weak. and harrows like treason? you would kill your king? and virens like oh youre no use to me dead. i need you to see i was right + puts him in a coin (explicitly gives him a fate worse than death) and goes on trying to start a war w xadia. there. we have manipulator viren heroic harrow w agency a sense of urgency for the prince's mission and a conflict that's not easy to peg into good guys and bad guys. that took me what? a day to think of. tdp should have been good should have been nottt bad. amen
#s.ask#i was going to put this under a readmore but actually i dont value anyone's time#it could have been good... men are such untalented writers... harrow could have been such a good character#+ viren having that safety net of. if he fails he can still trade harrow's life to escape. he's alreadh betrayed his best friend once#whats another betrayal? whats two?#ohh he could have been ITTTT 😩#stupid fucking dragon show
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Pirate AU, captain Plum getting so angry at Peach, so stupidly furious, maybe she withheld information, maybe she did somethign dangerous and stupid, maybe she chased a ghost and endangered the crew, or just...was so dimissive to her own existence it just finally got to her, maybe she'd spent too long drowning her sorrows and being useless. Whatever caused it, Plum starts to throw her weight around as a leader. Kicks her second in command her sword, Peach doesnt even carry it most days, whats the point? She wont die if she's caught without it. So she sees it being presented, eyeing the captain from where she sits.
"Pick it up." Plums dead serious, Peach ignores her, she says it again, louder, angrier. the second time was not a request at all, so with a sluggish stagger peach gets up, picks her sword up, it is not in the best condition, she'd fix that but cant be bothered. It doesnt matter to her one way or another.
She instinctivley blocks an incoming attack, Plum is so mad, venting her anger at this woman through practice, or...maybe this isnt practice? She's attacking with real intent, perhaps a good fight would knock some sense into Peach. The woman seems only half heartedly bothering to defend, she doesnt fight back in any way, slowly being backed up to a mast, ducking to not get hit in the side, plums blade dinking off the wooden trunk.
This goes on for a while, with each lazy movement Plum becomes more furious, how is she putting so little effort into this and coming out unscathed? It dawns on her that if Peach was to fight back, would she have the clear advantage she thought she originally posessed? Plum thought she was the more refined and skilled fighter but...this womans wasting her potential.
Peach grows bored of the back and forth, instead of dodging, taking the hit. People tended to stop attacking soon after that. In a real fight she'd fake her death and get up after a minute of pretending to get back and protect whoever needs it. Plum however knows this tactic, she cant fake her death, the sword in her shoulder hurts, shes immortal, not immune to pain, grabbign it by the blade and pushing it back out of her, an act that unsettles plum, seeing the womans hand cut as she didnt struggle to remove her sword. No slowing, no time to think, plum takes another quick move to land another hit.
Theyre nose to nose, blade through this womans torso, poking out the other side. Of course Peach cries out from the sting of it, gutteral response, but it subsides, she can ignore it and focus on the captain, glaring up at her with such rage in her eyes.
"You done?" a raised eyebrow and calm demeanour from the old pirate. "Fight back." Plum wanted to see what was lurking on this ship, what she'd hired, irritated still from earlier. "You dont want that, just let me go back to my drink." Peach eyed the bottle stood on a barrel not too far away, just wanting a peaceful watch on deck. "No. You need to care. You need to do more than defend, I need a second in command who'll activley try to live, to survive, not just be a walking pin cushion and hope to die every time you take a hit."
This was stupid, the slight twist of the blade in peach's gut a threat, Plum felt guilt, she shoudlnt have been doing this, knew it hurt her, but would never kill. The irrittion that this idiot, this woman who could do so much, would just simply choose to do nothing instead got to her however.
"I'm not fighting you."
"Why not?!" Plums sword slid out and she took another agile swing, slicing through the womans shoulder, she didn teven try to move away from it.
"Because theres no point. You'll lose, all the skill in the world wont end me, its a fruitless task." And truth be told, Peach wouldnt raise a blade to her, couldnt even, unsure why, just...couldnt bare to fight her properly, fully aware of the horrors she'd enacted on foe in the past, no friend deserves that.
"So you only act when its too late? Only do something when youve already lost." At such close proximity Plum was able to glare at her, and for a brief moment, Peach felt something she'd not had in her for a while. Rage. Not more than four days prior to this she'd mentioned the past, her wife, the way she got revenge for what happened. It felt like...Plum was calling her out for that. For not doing enough then, as if what happened was her fault. While to some degree she agreed, the fact that someone would think she'd not fight tooth and nail to protect what she loved sunk in, a second or two ticking by as the fury started to collect.
Some small fragment of her old self started to surface, instead of pulling her body off the blade, taking one hand and shoving her opponent hard, sword going with her, freeing Peach and giving them a meters grace, space to adjust.
For the first time, Plum felt a little fear because of this woman, watching her straighten up, stop slouching, hold her sword properly, but more than anything, it was her eyes, they looked dark and menacing now, not tired or dismissive like before.
"I need to see that you dont let disaster hit before you do something. The crew need a second in command who cares wether they live or die. I need you to show me you have any real fight in you left, because right now, you look like youve given up." Peach was drunk, her shirt now had some holes in it, a small amount of blood on her person, wounds already healing up, sticthing back together, realising she'd not instilled any faith in anyone here since arriving.
"Fine. Have it your way." That deep seated anger started to rattle around in her, for the first time during this exchange, taking a step forward instead of simply defending. Plum did all she could to stop what happened next. The swing of that chipped old blade was so heavy it broke through her defence, staggering her back quickly, Peach's pace refusing to faulter, closing the gap steadily, as if fully in control, it was daunting, she didnt flinch to block the striked plum threw, eyes set ahead. "This is what you wanted right?" another solid hit had to be dodged, not blocked, there was no way Plum could handle another stagger like that. Their fight was brief. within five hits, the old and in places rusted weapon wrapped itself in such a way around the captains pristeen rapier, a moment where peach flinged the sword across the deck, clattering as she took one strike to threaten.
Plum felt a sting on her cheek, a thin line of red starting to appear, such a controlled strike that it only scratched her, looking up to see the looming threat standing close. "Dont you dare think that I wouldnt act before its too late. Thats...not what happened before."
It was suddenly apparent how this woman gained such a reputation, not once since she'd joined the ship had Plum seen it, never seen her do more than the bare minimum. The sword was sheathed, and Peach turned, grabbing the bottle she'd been forced to leave, leading her way off up the other end of the ship to be alone.
At least the captain knew now just what she was working with, and it frightened her a little.
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hi friends! this is my reminder that tumblr is not real. (btw this is all from a girl's perspective)
lets think. what's a fan fav trope? sunshine x grumpy? when have you ever met a "grumpy" guy like rin? THEY DONT EXIST. everyone has at least a basic level of manners, and the people that don't are absolute douchebags who dont have the soft side that makes this trope so good. and even if a grumpy did exist, (you might be able to find a less grumpy version irl??) you wouldnt get to know them well enough for them to open up to you and love you. why? because they're BITCHES. like. IMMEDIATELY. no chance to say hi or get to know them, because it's "hi! nice to meet you! i'm y/n! what's your name?" "rin." *walks away*
also. guys dont hardcore fall for girls like the way we depict them. "the moment i laid eyes on her, i knew that she was the one for me. the one i would marry. the only one i could ever love" like uhhh bro what
LETS THINK OF ANOTHER TROPE!! hmmm only one bed? in WHAT scenario would you be sharing a bed with a guy. group of friends on vacay?? lets be fr the girls would all cram on one bed and the guys on the other. oh! for some reason youre the manager of their sports team?? first of all, girls aren't managers for all-boys teams (at least in the US in high school) but IF IT SOMEHOW HAPPENED, i absolutely GUARANTEE that the school/team would find another way to get you your own bed. there is NO WAY IN HELL you would share a bed with a guy. (as a girl, at least.)
ok! another one! enemies to lovers! ok so who do you know that has an actual "enemy?" NO ONE. people dont have enemies, and thats ESPECIALLY true for girl-guy relationships. "oh, y/n? yeah, she's weird as hell." "oh, *insert boy name?* he's such a creep like omg" THAT is what happens. THAT is reality. there is no hot hatred-fueled hookup. it's just "ewww i hate him hes so weird" like be fr.
what are some popular meet-cutes? first one that comes to mind for me is like A spilling coffee on B. that could be SORT of realistic but like what are the odds of the most gorgeous gorgeous gal (y/n) being in the exact same place at the exact same time as the most gorgeous gorgeous guy (tumblr fantasy man) and just so happening to spill her drink on this very specific man? ALMOST ZERO. this typa stuff just DOESNT HAPPEN. and on the slim chance that this did in fact occur, do you really think that a lot of guys would like offer to pay for your coffee and dry cleaning? NO. i had a guy BREAK my tumbler to the point that i couldn't use it and all i got was a lousy "sorry."
anyways i will still be reading and loving and writing and loving and dreaming and loving and hoping and loving on tumblr. when will i get a bf amen have a good day
#ami's chit chats 🤍#today i woke up and chose violence#sunshine x grumpy#grumpy x sunshine#enemies to lovers#only one bed#meet cute#BE FR GUYS
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Could you talk about Toriel and Carol’s relationship in your au? How did they end up married? Seems interesting!
yeah!!! this is one of those things where i think i first was like 'wouldnt this be funny' and then thought about it a little too hard and oh no im invested now.
basically, i knew from the start that rudy would be dead here...not sure WHEN exactly he dies, but i think it wasnt that far after dess and kris being presumed dead...maybe a year or so later. the loss of them both was just wayyy too much and since monsters partly hold on by hope its like. that breaks a man. the dreemurr divorce is also a LOT more bitter, here, since there's the loss of their youngest child to deal with. all that to say toriel and carol would turn to each other!! since they both lost their children in the same way, and then both lost their husbands, and eventually that becomes a relationship.
theyre ALSO together because i knew from the start the two families were going to be close (asriel is Very Much noelle's older brother) and making the moms married is just the logical conclusion from there lol. i think its good to put them together 'cause it also means i can further explore the theme of parents with noelle, too! the way i see it, carol actually sold the holiday house because losing dess + rudy so soon after each other was really hard on her, and the way she deals with her feelings is by pretending they dont exist and pushing through. and so for her, selling the house is like, leaving that part of her life behind. then it can't hurt her. so she has to plan everything out and shes VERY hard on noelle because she cannot lose noelle because noelle is sort of all she has left in the world.
noelle is very bitter about this. like her mom never cared about dess and rudy at all. and now doesnt love her, because she lost the actual family members she loved, and noelle is just the worst one she was left with. yes the holiday women have so many issues they refuse to talk out with each other.
with toriel its a lot easier to tell that she does love and care about noelle, but! this! manifests! in being super overprotective! which noelle ALSO hates!!! she cannot win. plus the moms do tend to side with each other (bc tori + carol know what page the other is on when the kids Never Do), so for noelle its like. her mom hates her and toriel never takes her side so like. what is she supposed to do with that?
in regards for the family structure, asriel's already 18 when carol and toriel get married so he doesn't consider carol his mom and probably still calls her 'aunt carol,' mayyyybe he uses 'stepmom' if talking about her to someone else but she's been his aunt his entire childhood so i think thats what sticks. aka he probably only uses 'stepmom' if he wants to quickly get across that she's married to his mom, otherwise he describes her as his aunt. he 100% sees noelle as his little sister. noelle usually just calls toriel 'toriel' (so she drops the 'aunt') and would use 'stepmom' when talking about her to other people. like asriel, she 100% sees him as her older brother.
they hyphenate their last names so its 'holiday-dreemurr.' noelle has this last name, asriel might just stick with dreemurr?? i honestly dont know lol. he lives with them but again. hes an adult when they get married.
annnnnd thats all i have on them so far! when i get into the writing of this i'll probably do a lot of little test-scenes for all these dynamics, lol, but i'm a bit far out for now. the two test-scenes i wrote were 'cause i Had To or else i would explode.
#drkau#deltarune#ask#cannot wait to get halfway through writing this au#and then chapters 3 + 4 drop and reveal that carol's name is not even carol#that's gonna be really funny <3 god knows what i'll do then. im just not thinking about it.#BUT YEAH I LOVE THEM.....its a very fun family!!!
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Hey lexi, was just reading into your profile cause Im bored as hell doing 50 different assignments, and noticed that you read someone's ao3 story, and now I'm not asking you to check my nonsense out (mainly because I write most of it at 4am living off an iced coffee I had 12 hours ago), but like what advice would you normally have for someone writing a twdg modern au? I did a first part from Lee's world, but I fear it'll be a bit different with an obv now teenage clem's side of things, mainly cause I felt like I was good at writing Lee, but that doesnt range with every character. I try to read different people's styles and that kinda stuff to navigate mine, as Ive only recently started. I think im writing too much I think so um yea, any advice? :D
when it comes to a modern au specifically i guess its really just about how dialed up on the trauma everyone is lol
the apocalypse has not happened and you as the writer get to decide what that means. people are shaped by their life experiences. what experiences have these characters endured and where has that put them emotionally? (are clems parents still dead? did lees wife still cheat on him? did anybody get sent to ericsons? etc)
although youve thrown them in a new setting, characters will still have general defining traits that make them recognizable And guide their actions (try to get at Least 3 traits because it gives them room to be influenced by each other Plus keeps them from being one note). be mindful of how these traits are balanced
going back to the source material is my only method for trying to nail down a characters voice/general vibes. why do they think and act and speak the way they do? what vocabulary do they use? whats their body language? unless youre talking about improving at descriptive text i wouldnt use other peoples fic for character inspiration (like example idk why people keep giving vi a southern drawl :/ i know shes from texas but she doesnt talk like ruby does... little things like that can make the character get lost in translation)
the fun part about modern aus is that you can do a lot with them since you decide which versions of these characters exist in that world :) really i just treat the source material like a character bible and have fun with it. all the info you need is right there
#answering this instead of doing my own assignments#hope this helps 😭 like i know what im doing#ok back to work...#replies with lexi#incognito
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okay so like this is going to be EXTREMELY long but its not hostile at all (and i'm the guy who did those tags, that was my main blog and this is my dangan sideblog) im just saying Why i left those tags and What i think of v3
and im saying all this because i like v3, i really do! i just wish it was better!
im gonna touch on the localization stuff first: they changed some of kokichi's lines that sort of, removed his more "soft" moments (for lack of a better word) and gave him depth?
like, there was this one time in one of the trials where kaito calls him naive, and ouma just insults him back and laughs at him or whatever
but in the original, kaito called him iirc "pure?" and ouma says something along the lines of "no one's ever referred to me like that before..." with the implication being he's more stunned, possibly even touched, that someone referred to him with such an "innocent" term
but thats nothing compared to gonta. the localization and honestly the game itself did gonta so goddamn dirty. in the og, he doesnt have tarzan speak!! he spoke in the third person yeah, but so did a few other characters- it gives a sort of, childish connotation in japanese, but the tarzan speak thing in the eng localization completely undermines his character and makes him look way dumber than he actually is, making him seem like he has little to no agency in the story
did you know that gonta actually KNEW that ouma's plan was to get everyone to have a motive video viewing party? and that he was only mad at ouma for lying and saying that he liked bugs, and he was In On It wrt the motive video viewing party?
yeah you literally cant know this unless you go do gonta's free time event when they're in gonta's lab scheming together. why was this CRUCIAL bit of information for character motivations sequestered like this. why did they do that. why. there is so much goddamn discourse over wether or not ouma manipulated gonta and if this scene was like, a little easier to get to, i wouldnt have to get it beamed into my eyeballs so much that i put a fucking manifesto as my blog title and bio
it looks crazy but ive been driven crazy. ive been here since 2016, since before this blog existed. i predate v3. help me
anyway thats JUST the localization issues and that one scene being hard to access. but i'll get on with the rest of it
and i just want to say: in a vaccum, v3 is quite good! it's not a godawful game, the characters are entertaining, it definitely has a good skeleton
but like, to see exactly why i think this game is not up to par- play v3 and sdr2 in tandem. spend one night on v3, one night on sdr2, the next on v3, or switch every few hours, however it appeals to you. but play them side-by-side
You Will Notice. Some Things.
FOR ONE: the days in sdr2 are just... longer. there's more stuff in them, more story. there's a lot that's missing from v3 and as such it feels empty
no one mourns the dead. shuichi mourns kaede but that's it for the whole game, until chapter 6 where he says that it's been horrible watching his friends die every week
in sdr2, here's how it worked in a story structure sense: the investigation itself was for mourning the victim, the trial was the Fun Part where nobody is mourned, really, and the focus is on finding the blackened, and the post-trial epilogue and is when we mourned the blackened
in v3.... the victims..... aren't mourned.
at all.
the blackends are, at the end of the trials, but only at the end of the trials.
in sdr2, hiyoko makes a memorial for mahiru using her photos. soda and nakomaru tie komaeda up because he manipulated teruteru into killing. byakuya was like, the main character of chapter 1 and had a prominent role before he was killed, meaning we saw a lot of him and ergo got close to him and mourned him. hajime was disturbed seeing his body. fuyuhiko talks about peko and how much he misses her. hajime mourns, he talks about the dead....
all of that is missing in v3
they're dead, and then they're gone.
rantaro as the first dead was a character with a lot of potential (WE WILL GET TO RANTARO.) but he didn't really have a prominent role at all. he was just another face in the crowd, until he wasn't. the only reason you'd mourn his death is if he was your favorite- byakuya in sdr2 was not my favorite (fuyuhiko my beloved and komaeda my beloved) but i still felt something when he died simply because of how prominent he was!
kaede as the protagonist, yeah her death had weight
we didnt get to know ryoma at all, or kirumi. or tenko or angie. et cetera
SPEAKING OF THE CHARACTERS.
so, broadly, there are two categories a character can fall in: active and reactive characters
active characters act on their own, without outside stimuli. reactive characters will just do nothing but go about their daily lives until something spurs them into action
all of sdr2's characters are on some level active.
most of v3's characters are reactive. you do not want this in a mystery game.
in sdr2, everyone was talking about escaping, all the time. in v3 they all give up after the first chapter
in sdr2, everyone tried to stay united no matter what happened because they all understood that this was an extreme circumstance, and that the real enemy was monokuma. fucking- fuyuhiko committed a proxy murder, basically, and he was still welcome in the group! because they understood that he was under extreme emotion and that not only his talent played a part in his reaction, but they were all trapped and cornered and being psychologically tormented and that thats why he did what he did! like, there was tension at first.... and fuyuhiko attempted seppuku.... but he was accepted and at least hajime did try, even if hiyoko was still angry at him
in v3 monokuma just straight up joins in the fifth trial and the characters just Let Him? he's supposed to be their enemy!
in sdr2, every character had a purpose. some of those purposes were pretty weak, yeah, but they were like... there. teruteru as the Funny Pervert got old fast, and that's probably why he died really early on, and they did manage to give him like, actual pathos. akane as the Funny Comic Relief Food One got oldddd but she's kind of the weakest out of the characters that survive. soda also, but at least he did stuff like make the transmitter in chapter 3 or fix the elevator in chapter 4, so he wasn't just the Funny Simp One, he did stuff
like, let me ask this: from a story perspective, i.e. their impact on how the plot moved forward, disregarding trials because everyone speaks in those....
what did himiko do. or tenko. tenko straight up didnt do ANYTHING for the greater plot. what did kirumi do? or ryoma? did we really feel the betrayal of tsumugi being the mastermind? we didn't know her!! what did angie do outside of chapter 3, and even then, the student council thing is over before it starts (because v3 days have less ssssssssstuff in them) korekiyo is just There until he reveals that he's fucking his sister and then dies.
none of these motherfuckers are active characters. no one is trying to escape, everyone is playing along. shuichi isn't even very active and he's our PROTAGONIST! he just kind of.... takes it
and that wouldve been interesting, to see someone who just takes it up the ass slowly blossom into being more confident, not letting monokuma railroad him in trials PERCHANCE. and i know shuichi did do that, he got more confident, but he still doesn't even TRY to escape, he's never suspicious of the flashback lights, always assumes ouma's malice is the real thing and everything else is the lie (when really, it was the other way goddamn round)
and like. he's the ULTIMATE DETECTIVE! HE SHOULD BE DOING THIS SHIT!!
the only truly active characters, that actually act on their own and Do Stuff that impacts the plot outside of dying and killing someone...
are kokichi and rantaro.
and rantaro dies in chapter one.
this is, in clinical terms, not good.
chapters 4 and 5 are REALLY good, because ouma does shit and actually impacts the plot and it makes the other characters also be active for once
but the whole rest of the game is like, ouma is doing everything to try and figure everything out, and everyone else is just kind of going thru the motions and treating him with komaeda level ostricization when, at that point in the game, he'd done nothing to warrant it
and at the end of chapter 4, when gonta says that he doesn't want anyone to be mad at kokichi and wants everyone to get along, the whole cast writes him off as a naive idiot and completely disregards his final wishes, which makes sense narratively, but not even shuichi, the ultimate. detective. stops and thinks that maybe something is a bit wrong here
rantaro is just a whole ball of wasted potential sorry. he was the second most interesting character in the game, puzzling things out on his own and doing his best to survive. he was cool and mysterious and smart and he's the first to die and i dont CARE if monokuma ~lampshaded~ it later and was mad at tsumugi for killing him so early, it just means that they KNEW it was a shit idea and then did it anyway!
like. i really like rantaro's secrets being unveiled posthumously. but he shouldve at least died in chapter two, so we got some more time with him. or at least was extremely prominent in chapter one, like byakuya was. but neither happened and what we ended up with was the one active character trying to escape getting fucking shot putted before he has the chance to do literally anything
and maybe it wouldve worked if everyone wasnt so egregiously reactive? the trick with kaede was cool but the game was so focused on that that they forgot to mourn rantaro or like give the audience enough time with him to care when he died. and maybe the "died first, important later" thing COULD have worked if he wasnt one of two active characters!!!!
(most of them are active in chapter 5 ill give them that. but like.... just 5)
and after all this.... the ending. the idea of the ending is kind of good. but the same people that made the ending made the rest of the fucking game and that does not bode well
the ending is.... how do i put this..... imagine a 26 year old that still proudly identifies as an "antishipper." imagine the extremely myopic view this person would have on the relationship between fiction and reality
now imagine this person was in charge of writing a game.
that's what the ending is like.
in the game, the narrative is that "danganronpa" was a video game that got so popular that it turned into an irl reality show, which is the exact kind of myopic "WELL, YOU LIKE THE BAD THING IN FICTION, SO YOU'D CHEER FOR IT IRL, RIGHT? RIGHT??? ITS TOTALLY THE SAME THING!!!" view your bog standard antishipper would have. it's just not very good, imo
in sdr2, they pulled off the "its all fake~!" thing a LOT better, the two endings are strikingly similar and yeah just play them in tandem and you might see what im talking about, because i loved v3 (still do!) but when i played it and sdr2 in tandem i realized ah..... sdr2 is way better in quality....
i like the ambiguous ending in v3, it ties to the "truth and lies" thing nicely, but its like.... again, the same people that wrote that wrote the rest of the game
and there are some hints that it's televised in some way (the characters refer to the blood as "red," monokuma refers to it as "pink," i.e. the pink blood is a tv censor and the characters are seeing the true red) but not really anything else
and it feels less like a "keeping things ambiguous" thing and more like a "they forgot to put details in their game" thing
which i wouldnt think if it were not for the fact that sdr2 is extremely detailed (they remember mealtimes and remember to write in hajime's narration that everyone is eating, which pays off WELL in chapter 4 with the funhouse) and v3 forgot that their characters have to do stuff
also the Things in the v3 chapters just dont have as much weight to them like in sdr2? everyone was talking abt twilight syndrome murder case, the despair disease split everyone up (and soda got to use his talent by making that transmitter) (THATS ANOTHER THING no one in v3 uses their talents for the most part or acknowledges others' talents), the funhouse was a multi-day ordeal, and everyone was involved in chapter 5's Stopping The Rival and the leadup to the now-standard Chapter Five Extremely Cruel And Unusual Rival Death
the magic show in v3's second chapter was kind of being prepped in the background and shuichi had nothing to do with it, and its only purpose was a distraction. the motive videos were kind of there and only useful for the insect meet and greet and then the trial itself. the student council in chapter 3 wasn't around for long and didn't do anything, we only spent a day in chapter 4's virtural world as opposed to the three in sdr2, chapter 5 was good tho chapter 5 can stay. kaito being missing and shuichi being despondent over the secret of the outside world was good and had weight bc we spent a good chunk of chapter 4 hanging out w kaito and seeing him be cute and stuff. we were invested and now he's gone!
and also smaller details like blackends in sdr2 being suspicious before/during the trials, there were actual clues that something was wrong (teruteru lying about the meat skewers, peko being wet, mikan being hot when laying on hajime (i.e. feverish,) we SAW gundham in the room with the alarm clock; there were enough clues to put it together before it was revealed in the trial
i love v3 and i'm so upset about it because i love v3 and i love danganronpa- i sunk a lot of time into this game and the ending seemed spiteful that i even like the game. it was seemingly a critique on fan culture but written by someone with the most condescending, myopic lens on what fan culture actually is
v3's commentary on fan culture was written by the same person who wrote hifumi yamada as the ultimate fanfic writer and it shows
anyway u h . i am very sorry for leaving a fucking THESIS on your innocent question about my tags. but that's why i think that
I have come to realize that, to me, one of the worst crimes a piece of fiction can commit is being mean-spirited. Just about anything else can be good in certain circumstances. But a mean-spirited work diminishes anyone who encounters it.
#SORRY AGAIN 4 THE DISSERTATION ;A;#lyrelies#im rewriting v3 as like a fun little project for Me#im not saying its gonna be 'better' than v3 itself#im just doing it for funsies#taking a spin on it#the premise is that rantaro and kaede both survive and forn a duo#kaede and shuichi represent trust and truth respectively#while rantaro and kokichi represent distrust and lies respectively#i thought itd be fun bc the rival never has like A Buddy#give em a little buddy for enrichment#rantaro is gonna KIND OF be The Komaeda#but if komaeda was like. just as weird but way better at masking#which i think makes him more unsettling#because you can never be sure that he's got Something Up With Him#but you always kind of wonder....#anyway im going off topic#but yeagh
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i love my friends so much like i have so much love for them i feel like exploding. i am currently far away from them since we go to our summer house. i love Z so so much she lives so so so far away from me but i thank everyday that i became friends with her, shes just perfect, so loevly and oh my god i dont understand how she cant love herself, if only she saw herself through my eyes she would realise how she is perfection in a human form and i hate her ex boyfriend and how she cries because of him because she doesnt deserve to be sad in any way, she should only feel happy and love herself so so much. i usually am great at writing ( at least i think so, or i am improving) but i just cant put into words how much i adore her, if she wanted me to i could write do many poems about her, enough for them to be a book and published i want everyone to know how much i cherish her and i love it when she told me that i make her feel good when she is sad, i literally giggled and kicked my feet like i made feel happy oh my god this is a blessing from god, i love making you making you happy please be so happy. and my love isn't romantic its just pure friendship love. i also really like A she is my only school friend like when everbody left me because of an argumwnt with a friends and ignored me she was still there for me. one week ago she told me that she liked a guy i was really close with and she was scared that i would hate her for it but of course not i love her so much to just hate her for that and its not like she did anything bad to me or talked behind my back and actually i was really happy that she trusted me so much to the point of telling me i really really also love her sometimes when we are hanging out i just feel like hugging and kissing her cheeks and even though she is bot the biggest fan of pyhscial concat she still lets me hug her and even sleep together, i spend most of my time with her and i am so gald to have her in my life if she was not with me i think i would feel so lonely and miserable, words cant explain how much i am grateful for her, like i saw a horror house reel and my first thought was we should totally go together i want to go together so much with her and then visit this new cafe i saw on the internet, i just really like hanging out with her and topics can go from gossiping with people to talking about our traumas and to why we exist then back to gossip. and i dont get how she can hate herself like oh my god why do people around me has to hate themselves when they are so fucking amazing and beautiful and i hate it when she looks in the mirror and says that she looks ugly like no you are one of the prettiest people in my eyes like you have a great body a great face and a great personality, like i know she can be an asshole and two faced at times but i know she wouldnt do that to me because she actually trusts me and even if she was satan himself i would still countine to love her because i have been around her enough to realise that she is one of the best people and i really apperciate her. i love B i have know her for like six year and we still go on and i am so happy with her too even though we havent been close the first two years we are very close right now like i know every shit she eats and her drama and she was the one who was beside me when i had no one to rely on if she wasnt then i really wpuld have been totally deprived of human concat in the quarintia, yes she talks too much abput boys and it can get annoyüng at times but i love how when i am with her i can just relax and sit back and listen of course i love to talk but i am a listener and its good to listen sometimes and i love how its not one side and i still can talk about my life to her i hope she still will be in my life in 10 year and more and more she is my only friend left from middle scholl and i really really love her.
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#ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#if you see this pls ignore it#thanks#i literally just exist especially on my moms side of the family#like i can show my mom a song or tv show or movie and think its funny and think shell find it funny and she doesnt#but the moment my sister shows her something shes dying of laughter#like damn okay we get it shes your favourite#and i get it.#gia is funny and pretty and talented and im not#like i hate hanging out with my sister and my friend cause my sister is just sooo funny and she can make my friend cry of laughter#while with me my friend will laugh and be like haha shae youre crazy or youre funny#but i mean im not ?? like#if i get my friend to laugh so hard she cries its because i did something seriosuly stupid and embarrassing or its what she said and i just#posted it to twitter with the *right* caption and gif. like im a literal nobody. no one would miss me if im gone. half the people on here#wouldnt notice if i disappeared and no one anywhere else would know either. i just exist. im not funny or pretty or talented or anything. i#bring nothing to the table. im just ordinary and i wish i was extraordinary. i just wanna be able to make someone laugh so hard they cry. i#wanna be funny and pretty and talented and i wanna have a nice good outgoing fun loving personality but i dont. i dont wanna just exist but#sadly thats all i can do. is just exist and waste space. take up oxygen that should go to someone more deserving 💔💔💔💔💔
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i disagree: victor doesnt seem very avoidant to me. he confronts his problems several times and attempts to reach out to others in order to correct its consequences, particularly if we are viewing the creature as the manifestation of these emotions. but when those he looks onto for support fail him (often through no fault of their own - there really is no good outcome), he is forced to take matters into his own hands, even when he is often physically or mentally unable to do so. but instead of ignoring the issue or giving up, he DOES confront it.
the sole exception to this is after his recovery at ingolstadt - notably after a period of acute mental stress and physical illness - where he chooses to pretend the creature he made a year ago doesnt exist and learns oriental language with henry instead. that is definitely avoidant behavior (but for all victor knows the creature ran off in the forest and died by now, he could be anywhere. what’s he supposed to do?).
side note: “he should have confronted what he did with the creature and told someone, told Clerval” victor DID. he rambled about the creature to henry “incessantly” during his illness, to no avail - henry either dismisses it as the offspring of his delirium or simply does not press further. this experience (and similar ones he would have afterwards, when he attempts to reach out again) continue to reinforce to victor that he CANT rely on others for support in this regard, because they wont believe him, and thus he has to take matters into his own hands.
however id argue when the consequences come knocking, he still immediately takes action: when william is murdered he returns home to geneva and tells his family he knows the murderer, who dismiss him and so now victor is forced to rely on the justice of the court. when this falls through as justine is unfairly trialed and executed, victor resolves to confront the creature himself and is ready to throw hands.
when they come to an agreement, victor commits to creating a bride for the creature knowing the toll it took on his physical and mental health the first time, and only backs out after realizing it was improbable and nothing would hold the og creature and second creature accountable to the promise and he could just be increasing their potential for violence 2x (there are more complex psychological reasonings behind this as well-namely victor breaking the cycle of abuse-however that’s for another time). either how, risking his health to create a female creature should never have been considered a viable option, and backing out in such an extreme case i wouldnt consider avoidance behavior - it shouldnt be an expectation in the first place.
afterwards, when henry is killed and victor is released from prison, he chooses to wed elizabeth because he believes the consequence will be either his own life or the creature’s. he knows by marrying elizabeth he will ignite the creature’s rage and murderous tendencies (for him, not elizabeth, victor believes) and instead of avoiding this, either by delaying the marriage or other means, he prepares for this event by arming himself and deciding to kill the creature or die trying, thus ending everything once and for all. when elizabeth is inevitably murdered instead, victor goes to the magistrate for support and tells him everything, who of course does not believe him because what he’s got to say is so improbable - particularly given his history of psychotic illness and believed “madness” - and again victor chooses to face the issue head-on and pursues the creature himself, literally to his own death.
of course, he doesn’t directly address his other emotional issues, but if, like you said, the creature is a physical representation of victor’s despair and guilt and shame, and when everybody refuses to take him seriously or help when victor begins to reach out about the 8-foot homunculus actively threatening to murder his entire family, then of course he can’t begin to tackle the emotional complexities of his other feelings underneath - that is, his lack of desire to marry elizabeth, his remaining relationship with ernest, etc.
so im of the opinion that victor was by in large not avoidant of his problems/feelings, but he’s seen this way simply because he was ineffectual: i dont think he COULD fix his life, whether he had the fight to do so or not - because despite his efforts, there was simply nothing he could really do given the circumstances he was dealt. he was doomed from the beginning. and that’s really a more disturbing conclusion here - because we are condemning victor for things he could not have possibly changed.
This is not an attack on you at ALL I’m sorry for moving this to it’s own post I just have Opinions™️ and I need be weird about this book rq I’ll tag you anyway in case you’re interested like at all in my dumb little opinion @adrianfridge-main
I just woke up but DISAGREED Victor’s complaining was completely and utterly justified tbh (bro fucked up astronomically big time and as a result his entire family is dead, I think he’s earned the right to be in despair), Victor’s biggest flaw was the fact he stitched together a mass of corpses and brought it to life and then told nobody, Victor’s biggest flaw is avoidance – and part of that is understandable, it’s a common trauma response, but Victor should have been open about how he felt about Elizabeth, he should have worked through his feelings about his family and expressed them, he should have confronted what he did with the creature and told someone, told Clerval, Victor’s biggest flaw isn’t that he’s in despair, it’s that he rarely explains that despair to others – and it’s understandable why he doesn’t, but it’s still wrong, because that’s how he hurts people.
He keeps parts of himself hidden – as arguably represented by the creature himself. He begins to isolate himself for really the first time, he has a lot of space away from people he’s been around his entire life for really the first time, and it’s fairly safe to say that psychological things begin to build up, as he builds the creature, almost represented by him – whatever interpretation you have of these knew-found realisations can greatly vary depending on the reading of the book you have, but personally I think it’s mostly how he feels about himself and his family.
I don’t think Victor wanted to marry Elizabeth at all – and I’ll probably make a whole catch-all rant on that point soon enough, but I think once he actually begins to get some time in isolation to think about things, he starts thinking about his mother, he starts thinking about Elizabeth, he starts considering all these complicated feelings, that he genuinely does love his mother, but that she’s effectively forcing him into something he doesn’t want to do at all, surely she’d understand if he just explained – but she’s dead, he can’t explain, it’s too late for that. Would she have accepted his explanations in the first place, or would he have disappointed her? This was his mother’s only dying wish, the last thing she left to him, the last thing he had to remember her by – and I do believe Victor genuinely loved his mother, even if I’m also absolutely of the opinion that she was a terrible person. Instead of coming to a conclusion about this, Victor spirals, it builds up, he tells no-one – I don’t believe he would’ve told Henry – and this coincides with the creation of the creature. His dead mother’s final wish being the definitive thing haunting him, and the representation of his spiral and all of his emotions about that being a mass of sentient corpses – seems accurate.
Following this argument, Victor sees Clerval again after all those years, and he collapses from the weight of it all – he rants about it vaguely, but he hides it, and he continues to do so, ignoring it, and that’s when it slowly begins to become harmful, purposefully picking off the people he loves and hurting them.
It’s important to remember still, of course, that the monster isn’t metaphorical, he is real – it’s just that a lot of heights of Victor’s despair and tendency to spiral into his own thoughts coincide well with the “building” of the creature, or with him becoming more vocally demanding of Victor or harmful to his loved ones, so he tends to be a pretty good approximation for a physical representation of Frankenstein’s mental state and guilt. And effectively, Frankenstein desperately trying to hide the creature, fumbling with promises to make further mistakes to push him away only to come to the realisation that they’re wrong, but still having to deal with the consequences of them, instead of just from the start being open and honest, even if that honestly was “I need some time to think, and I don’t know how I feel right now.” – that’s his biggest flaw. And the people Victor hurts is really best represented through Elizabeth herself – I hold the very very strong opinion that Victor and Elizabeth are both victims of what was pretty basically just grooming, and again, avoidance is a very common trauma response, but Elizabeth tried to confront Victor on multiple occasions, sending that letter asking about how he feels about the marriage, saying it doesn’t need to happen if he doesn’t want it to – instead he misinterprets this as his poor dear cousin in despair second-guessing his affections for her, (very likely because of things his mother probably told him as a child), and decides to “put her mind at ease” by telling her that he will marry her, despite his actions saying completely otherwise and Elizabeth herself pretty openly not really wanting to marry him.
He’s gone through so much at this point, feels himself responsible for so many deaths, and decides the final thing he needs to do before he dies is not to be a disgrace to his parents as well, or any more of a disgrace than he already is, in his eyes.
And I also definitely have a queer reading of the novel – I genuinely do really hold to the interpretation of Frankenstein and Clerval’s relationship being romantic, and from there and concerning the creation of the bride, Henry really is effectively murdered as a punishment for Victor doubting the role given to him – almost like his doubts and guilt, as embodied by the creature, overwhelm him in that way. “Ah! my father, do not remain in this wretched country; take me where I may forget myself, my existence, and all the world.” He’s pushing away the memory of Clerval’s death, repressing it, avoiding it, and that is extremely important for how he shifts his tone with Elizabeth and puts up that fake demeanour of wanting to marry her, because he thinks it’ll make her happy even though both of them describe dreading the wedding, even given the context for Victor and even by Elizabeth, who doesn’t know what he dreads – in order to forget Clerval, he assigns himself to the role given to him as a child by marrying Elizabeth and gives up whatever he hope he had.
All possibly discouraged from Clerval being murdered as a response to Victor refusing to finish the Bride and subject her to the same fate as him and Elizabeth to the Creature, a pact made without her knowledge or consent, an arranged marriage. Where has spiting that tradition led him? Where has him standing up to the shroud of his mother’s dying wishes, hanging over him the entire novel thus far, led him, by refusing to force the Bride into an arranged marriage with the Creature, as he was with Elizabeth? To the death of the one man he truly loved. So, can at least “make his dear cousin happy” and not die spiting the one thing he was meant to do – make his mother proud from beyond the grave by marrying Elizabeth.
And even then, adding to my argument of the creature being a physical embodiment of Frankenstein‘s guilt and dread – that building tension approaching the wedding, Victor being convinced the creature is going to kill him, but he kills Elizabeth – that’s a metaphor if I’ve ever seen it.
Even on the subject of grieving Clerval, Victor won’t sort his feelings, he spirals and tries so desperately to avoid them. “We had resolved not to go to London, but to cross the country to Portsmouth, and thence to embark for Havre. I preferred this plan principally because I dreaded to see again those places in which I had enjoyed a few moments of tranquillity with my beloved Clerval. I thought with horror of seeing again those persons whom we had been accustomed to visit together, and who might make inquiries concerning an event.”
I wonder what would happen if he did go through London, if he did meet those people again. Would things have turned out differently? Would he finally have been given a sense of comfort and clarity through mutual grief, as nobody so far since Henry’s death and for the rest of the book, except the creature, ironically, has grieved for Clerval except for Frankenstein. If he met people who took as fondly to Clerval as he did, at least on meeting him briefly, who would have sympathy towards Victor – would he finally have that space to grieve for him in a healthy way, to be comforted by people who at least vaguely understand a fraction of his anguish?
But he doesn’t, and instead he avoids the subject – confining himself to his union with Elizabeth, and hurting her because of that.
And even to his grave, Frankenstein doesn’t stop to consider his feelings properly, and by that I mean he doesn’t sort them with anyone, he doesn’t admit the dread he feels surrounding his family and his late wife, he doesn’t stay with Ernest and talk through things with him, bonding to his last remaining family member in his grief – instead he spirals again, chasing the monster and telling no one, except for Walton. And even then, he doesn’t discuss, he monologues – he doesn’t talk through his emotions with a trusted friend, he “tells his story” to an eager man who is mostly overwhelmingly curious, rather than genuinely concerned.
Victor Frankenstein’s biggest flaw is not that he complains. It isn’t that he’s in despair – it’s that he won’t articulate that despair properly. It’s that he avoids it and keeps it hidden out of pain, but he shouldn’t. Because the subject of that despair actively effects the people around him, and by extension, his despair actively effects the people around him. Elizabeth is left hanging by a man who doesn’t truly love her and won’t talk to her, forcing her into a marriage she doesn’t really want out of duty. The creature is cast aside and abandoned, viewed mostly by Victor as a representation of his guilt and shame, of his worst mistakes, although he expresses feeling pity for it fairly often, he still hides and shuns it, fearing it. Clerval is murdered as a representation of that hope for a better future, the one man who ever truly loved him being snatched away, and instead of standing his ground, coming to the conclusion that he won’t abide by his mother’s wishes, that he was right in his destruction of the bride, grieving Clerval with those people in London and using his death as a catalyst to not let it happen again, perhaps then meeting Walton at a later date if he chose to stay in England or otherwise by chance under different circumstances, writing to Elizabeth telling her his true feelings and confronting the creature properly, pulling a Christine Daaé there except like. Parentally instead of romantically. and showing his creation sympathy and compassion rather than just feeling it, and being open about everything; instead of that, Victor spirals, and Victor hurts everyone left.
And it’s understandable why he does – it’s realistic. The hero doesn’t always know exactly what to do and magically save the day by making all the right decisions – people don’t know what do do or how to make all the right decisions. Victor isn’t just complaining “woe-is-me” style, Victor is in genuine severe psychological torment and distress, and his actions reflect that. He is, to an extent, a victim of circumstance – and his circumstances haven’t made things easy for him. In his grief over Clerval, he’s led back to Geneva by his father instead of through London, and follows easily. He’s forced into a situation where he has to marry his cousin by his mother, since young childhood. When he tries to be assertive in what he wants, he’s punished for it every time. In real life, people don’t fix their situation easily like a superhero and pull themselves on their feet like that. They don’t get over everything that’s ever happened to them easily. They need space – and Frankenstein did not have space. If he wanted to fix his life, he would have had to actively fight for it. And he didn’t have any fight left. He didn’t want to live. He didn’t have any idea of what to do next. He didn’t see a future. Any time he tried to fight against what was expected of him, he was punished for it, so now that his life was effectively over, all he wanted to do was assign himself to the roles he was “meant” to perform, and not disappoint his family.
But it’s still a flaw, and it still hurts people. Victor was still in the wrong for what he did. For avoiding everything, for building the creature to begin with, that was Victor’s fault. But it’s understandable why he does what he does, and he’s a very sympathetic character because of that.
Me waking up to immediately write an entire Frankenstein essay I shit you not I’m still in bed finishing this I literally just woke up and started typing half asleep until I finished it (haha funny Nosferatu reference):
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the whole "ignoring DNIs" thing is dumb as hell. having boundaries doesnt make you untouchable, it cant shield you from criticism and accountability, and certain boundaries cant be completely off limits no matter what.
like holy shit, there is a difference between the completely reasonable boundary that calling people slurs or misgendering them against their will is a scummy thing even if said person is an asshole, and saying that the group that youre regularly attacking and/or invading the spaces of cant ever defend themselves against you, much less be mean about it
which yknow, is most often a result of being beaten down over and over again, being called a horrible person just for your existence, while also having said existence denied at the same time. you cant keep doing that shit to someone and then throw a hissy fit once they snap and throw courtesy out the window. they wouldnt react that way if they didnt have to constantly fight against attacks or sometimes outright misinformation campaigns against them! (btw im using they in the general sense- not specifically rouke or any of its members, but of course it does apply to it. i hope thats ok?)
if you made a DNI that said anti-endos cant interact, we all know that NONE of them would respect that, even if you were to stop interacting with any of them yourself. its lying of the most blatant kind to pretend its about "respecting boundaries" instead of doing everything in their power to silence the voices of the people they hate.
if it was about "respecting boundaries" and "just wanting to keep the communities separate", then they wouldnt be invading every tag or community related to endos and sending hate messages to blogs just for SUPPORTING endogenic systems (even if they arent endo themselves), or co-opting language that was created either for endos or specifically designed to be inclusive of all system types. even among those who *dont* do that (which if theyre a syscourse blog, almost never happens, because of the nature of a syscourse blog), you sure as fuck never see any of them try to intervene or criticise the sysmeds theyre all buddy-buddy with who ARE actively doing that shit, and im willing to bet its just because they agree with it but dont want to get called out on their hypocrisy. like jfc the amnt of times i see them say "we dont support fakeclaiming endos theyre just not systems" even though that like. still very much is constantly happening to everyone who doesnt fit within their limited frame of a "real system", whether theyre talking about an endogenic system or a traumagenic DID system that supports endogenics
if you truly dont support that behavior, then grow a fucking backbone and actually call it out when you see it! if you exclusively save your energy for yelling at endos and endo supporters and making shit up about them, rather than calling out legitimate toxic behavior regardless of the 'side' its coming from- youre a coward who only cares about the propaganda you want to spew, not about actually preventing harm or misinformation. if your asses cant even stop yourself from fucking over DID/OSDD systems (the very same people youre claiming to 'defend') just for disagreeing with you, then why are you even still trying to hide the real endgoal here? i mean we know why, because it doesnt make you look like the "good guys"- i wonder if theres a reason for that.
Yeah yeah yeah agreed on pretty much all counts tbh
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YAY YOU SAW THE MOVIE OF ALL TIME i need to hear more of your thoughts about eeaao if you're willing to share because. i feel like it's a movie that just like profoundly spoke to me about particular philosophies i have and i see that you also resonated with it
oh man ive had a long day and im still kinda reeling from it to be honest but god such a wonderful movie. its an almost perfect specimen of genre fiction and more broadly metaphor as a storytelling device bc the whole point of genre fiction (to me anyway) is that it uses these fantastical or otherworldly conflicts as metaphors for the most everyday human emotional conflicts. it catastrophizes things as commonplace and simple as a child's wish for their parent's love into a fractured consciousness spanning the infinite universe or a black hole that ruptures the fabric of reality. and even though we as the viewers dont understand what it would be like to deal with a conflict on that scale, the emotions being dealt with through the metaphor of the multiverse are so real and so recognizable that the conflict becomes real and recognizable as well. yeah it's an infinite web of real concrete universes with infinite possible alternate selves but really it's the fundamental diasporic question of What if I never left home? yeah it's a black hole that ruptures the fabric of reality created by a being of godlike power but really it's just a young woman tired of the world and her lot in life contemplating suicide. perfect use of metaphor! literally perfect!
And god the CIRCLES! the CIRCLES. the unending turmoil of a human life. you're never going to get back where you were as a kid but that kid will always exist. life is meaningless and therefore not worth living. also, life is meaningless and therefore worth living. thats something i really loved abt this movie was that like. Materially not much changes aside from evelyn's consciousness fracturing like joy's yk? there's no big sci fi resolution where they return to their home universes and live happily ever after. the circle doesnt break because there's not really a way to opt out of the craziness of your life. you're always going to be thinking about where you were and what you did and what you could've done and no matter how hard you try you're going to make decisions w consequences that you're going to struggle to live with. What matters isnt breaking the circle But there's always a different way to see things. theres the bagel, darkness enclosing light, and theres the googly eyes, darkness at the center of light. i see the good side not because im naive but bc how can i live otherwise? the laundromat represents both the endless tedium of their lives and a haven of comfort and love. Lauryn hill was so right when she said everything is everything
and on a level joy knows that from the very beginning! like she's overwhelmed and depressed and despairing that anything could ever get better bc life is meaningless. but when u look at the performance involved with her shenanigans..like the dancing the makeup the costumes! on a level she knows the meaning of life is just what you make it bc she wouldnt have constructed this elaborate theater around the bagel if she didnt get some kind of pleasure or satisfaction from it. it's fun! it's meaningless but she gets something from it! and of course that's not enough she needs the love and support from the people she loves to actually pull her back from the brink but i just love that from the very beginning she's so desperately human even with this insane godlike power she's just looking for something that makes her want to live
like it's an incredibly overwhelming and busy movie but with everything going on it has such a simple profound center to it which is just. Choose love! choose TO love. choose to be forgiving and kind. Bc love and faith are what give life meaning but they are also things that take immense strength to maintain. life doesnt just have a meaning hidden at its heart waiting for you to find. it takes effort and strength to continue to have that love and faith that make life worth living but literally what else can a person do? how else can a person live? Love must be made anew like bread etc.
and it doesnt feel preachy either! it's easy for such a simple message to come off as an out of touch platitude but the dialogue and the story and the acting and the chemistry btwn the characters makes it all so heartfelt! it's lighthearted without making a joke out of itself! the characters are so human and care for each other so much that when the core of the movie becomes clear it feels so so earnest and genuine it actually settles into you it makes it so easy to empathize with and internalize. in my experience its really hard to share simple but essential truth like "be kind" without seeming preachy or shallow bc its the kind of thing that no matter how many times you hear it only really hits you when you are able to internalize it. and this movie just does a beautiful earnest job of it
im gonna stop bc im too tired to make sense anymore lmfao but this is the first time in years ive watched a movie and it jumped to my top 5 within the first hour. excellent excellent movie i am going to think abt it for the rest of my life
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