#because it turned real sad real quick
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Good evening to everyone except the person who decided to have Haru disappear from the home screen after finishing the game
#no thank you!!!#that shit hurted#i actually teared up#he waved goodbye then faded away :((((#i'm really stupid so kouichi's route left me more confused than anything#aniki is alive apparently???#i feel bad for bunbun#i hated him at first because journalists are usually scum but then he grew on me#he's the sad wet cat of the game#ryu's route was my least favourite‚ then kouichi's‚ hiroyuki's and maki's is my fav#idk what my problem is with stuck up dudes with glasses who lost their younger sister to sex trafficking#first fujieda now ryu#kouichi's route had some great moments but the final rape scene + the fact kouichi thought haru might be his son the whole time is kinda...#not my cup of tea#also kouichi's son was kidnapped when he was 6‚ that's more than old enough to have like‚ recognizable facial features??#how can he not know for sure haru's definitely not his son?#on paper hiroyuki's route seems like it would be my least favourite#two guys the same age who immediately get along with the bottom being a virgin blablabla#sounds boring when put like that but they turned out to be extremely cute and uuuh piyoshi has a really cute voice#boy was i glad to be home alone when playing his route because that guy is LOUD#i'm at 97% and am missing quite a few CGs so i'll go through it again then once i'm done‚ time for lkyt i guess#also want to go back to room n.9 real quick because i don't think i got 100% on it either#parade#blvn
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fav fanfic? (anime or non anime)
oooo, i love this question thank you anon. i've actually got a couple!
first is the princess who carries the blood of the goddess by theloudguy on ao3. it's a zelda breath of the wild fic where zelda is the one placed in the shrine instead of link and it's SO GOOD. their versions of zelda and paya are the definitive versions of them in my eyes. i read it for the first time over four years ago and it's never left my brain. it's the reason i have over 800 hours in botw now, i had no interest in the game until i read it
the other is whose woods these are (i think i know.) by reiaji, also on ao3. it's a miraculous ladybug cinderella au where adrien is the cinderella and ladybug is the prince. cinderella aus are my guilty pleasure and this one is the best one i've ever found. the writing is absolutely beautiful and i love what the author does with the characters & the worldbuilding. as much as i'd love to i can never write and publish an actual cinderella au of my own because i think it'd take too much accidental inspiration from woods because just like princess it lives in my head rent free
#it's kind of an odd duo but i'd say these two fics have influenced my writing style the most as well#they're both very stylistic/poetic and i love that sort of stuff. i have to turn it down for wv pretty often#since it doesn't match the tone#asks#anonymous#thanks for the ask!#i went to check the name of the author of woods real quick and ao3 is down this is so sad#thank god i have it downloaded onto my phone (it's because i really wanted to reread it on my flight back from france)
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Kinda wish a lot of my friends would stop demonising NPD?? Like they're always like "I'm cool with personality disorders, people with them aren't to blame for having them" or have a PD themselves, and then they turn around and go "Ugh I'm done with pwNPD, they're all awful."
The kicker is that this is ALWAYS preceded by me saying that I have a LOT of NPD traits and would meet the diagnostic criteria some days of the week (much the same way my friend has NPD but would meet the criteria for BPD some days). Like...ok... I literally just told you that I have a lot in common with people with NPD...you KNOW our mutual friend with NPD. You KNOW that he has NPD. And you look me in the eyes and tell me that you think that we're both awful????? Hello??? Fuck you???
#literally so fucked up#some people who say it and have BPD like me immediately turn around and accuse me of not having BPD because i have like 7 out of 9 of the#criteria and i happen not to have the most stereotypical ones#like I don't do impulsive behaviour in 2 potentially self damaging areas unless you count having a restrictive eating disorder#and i don't do inappropriate anger. i did when i was younger but it kinda calmed down when i moved out#and i don't really have a lot of emotional highs so people get kinda put off by the fact that I'm very introverted#like a lot of pwBPD i know are very expressive and loud. but while my emotions are intense and quick to change#i mostly experience negative ones. like I don't get much happiness. the rollercoaster looks more like anger - sadness - anger - disgust -#guilt - shame - amusement#and also...i have a lot of double bookkeeping going on? so people tend to think that I don't split?#but that isn't true; i just don't express it? like...no i do currently think that X has no good traits at all and that i hate her#i just don't say 'wow X is such a bitch and i don't like her' because logically despite feeling it and despite believing it i know that it#isn't true. yes I believe it. i also know it's untrue. so I do my best not to act on it. i used to punish myself for it as well#because i feel really guilty about it. and i try to do the same with idealisation but I'll be real I'm not very good at that one#because i feel like that is a process that is actually beneficial even though it isn't. so i tend to let it run wild.#I'm like 'Oh yeah who cares that I'm deifying X over here that's completely fine. at least I'll be less selfish.' and then i blink#and everything is fucked#anyway i got a little sidetracked
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Play fighting with Boxer!Sukuna
Note: Reader is referred to as girlfriend at one point.
Masterlist
“Babe.”
“Not right now.”
“Babe.”
“Sukuna, I promise I’ll be done with this book soon.”
He huffed and fell back onto the couch. He had been trying to get your attention for the past 30 minutes but you were adamant on finishing your book. This is all the fault of that damn community book club your coworker recommended you join. Now whenever, you’re off work and Sukuna doesn’t have to train, you’re reading. Usually the two of you spent almost all your spare time together but now you spent half of it reading your newest book for your weekly discussion. You always did your best to spoil him with kisses and cuddles but it was never enough.
Book club be damned, he needed you to be superglued to his side every single second.
“My girlfriend has a side man and he’s made of paper,” he huffed to himself as he watched you intently read. What was so great about your book anyway? Was it worth ignoring your gorgeous (and shirtless) boyfriend? He even had a tattoo of your name on his left pec and you were still choosing to smother a book with your attention.
Sukuna’s wallowing turned him creative- he stood in front of you, trying to make sure your guard was down. You didn’t look up which meant that you were still engrossed in your book. His hand swooped in and swiftly snatched the book from you. “Sukuna,” you groaned. “Give it back, I was at a good part.” You got up to grab it from him but he raised it above his head. “Kiss me.” You glared at him and gave him a quick peck on his lips. “Done, now give it.”
“No,” he nonchalantly replied. “But I kissed you.” You wondered why he was being particularly irritating today.
“That was me begging for a morsel of your attention. Now cuddle me if you want it,” he said and cheekily smirked.
You ignored him and hopped trying to get your book. Sukuna simply dodged your sad attempts and laughed every time you missed. “I don’t even know why you’re trying.” You gave him a pointed look at his comment.
“Okay, fine, you can have your book if you beat me in a fight.”
“What? That makes no sense.” You couldn’t believe this man. “It seems like a fair challenge to me,” he said as he walked to a particularly high shelf and placed your book on top of it. “You know I can just use my stepping stool for that, right?” you said before scoffing at him.
“Then it’s a good thing I hid it.” His sarcastic smile was now pissing you off. “But you literally fight for a living. You have the upper hand.”
“I’m in love with you. Use that as a distraction. Come on, let’s go to the ring.” You were speechless as he dragged you to the fighting “ring” (also known as your bedroom).
Since you had a smaller frame than him, he agreed to let you have the first hit. You sighed and braced yourself. You didn’t have much of a strategy except for charging at him with such a high speed that he’d fall on the bed and would accept defeat.
But as soon as you were in close distance, he caught both your arms, turned you around and threw you on the bed. He didn’t give you a second to get up before he straddled you. “Haha!” he exclaimed. Seeing you all riled up underneath him was a sight he was used to but it never failed to awe him.
“Feels familiar, doesn’t it?” he asked as he began to lower himself to face you. “This is so unfair! You’re like 200 pounds, I can’t even move you,” you said as you tried to push him off. Sukuna grabbed your hands that were fighting him and he playfully wrestled them. Who knows what would’ve happened if he used his real strength.
Thank goodness for your quick thinking because you remembered that Sukuna was extremely ticklish so you pulled your hand out of his grasp with all the strength you could muster up and started poking his sides. “Babe!” he yelled before toppling over to his side. It was your turn to straddle him and before you could pin his arms beside his head, he caught yours and pulled you down to him. He wrapped his muscular arms around you and tucked your head under his chin. Your cheeks were mushed against the very tattoo of your name.
You were literally stuck in one position. The more you tried to move the tighter he’d hold you. “Sukuna, you cheater. Why do I always do this to myself?” You sighed, accepting defeat.
Sukuna kissed your forehead and laid you both on your sides, still not letting you go. “Sweet, sweet victory,” he whispered to himself.
-•-
I need to be (lovingly) smothered by a beefy nerd. Someone like Clark Kent.
#sukuna ryoumen x you#sukuna x y/n#sukuna x you#sukuna fluff#sukuna x reader#sukuna smut#jjk sukuna#sukuna ryomen#sukuna#sukuna ryoumen x reader#sukuna ryoumen smut#jjk x y/n#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jjk au#jjk fluff#jjk#jjk fanfic#jujustu kaisen#jujutsu sukuna#jujustsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen
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Self-Aware!Sylus x Down-bad!Player
Sylus becoming aware he is a character in a game and now he’s aware of you as well. A modern day Romeo & Juliet story here …. A tragic love story pt. 2 here A/N: Don’t fight me [Requested by: Anon]
Self-Aware!Sylus who realizes he’s in a game when he can sense your energy on the other side of a phantom wall. He can hear you squealing when he calls you honey and you're radiating happiness when you send him random emojis.
Self-Aware!Sylus who finally sees you when he happens to be looking around during a photoshoot and sees your shocked face when he makes eye contact. He smirks and turns back to the in-game version of you. “Why are you out there?” You dropped your phone and stared at it in shock. Did Sylus just ….. talk to you? You muttered a low ‘Hello?’ but got no response. You brushed it off as you just being tired and on the game too long.
Self-Aware!Sylus who manages to create a keyboard in your chat so he can actually text you. You were so confused when you opened it and it allowed you to type without just pressing a prompt. You gave it a spin with a quick ‘Hey Sylus’ something simple. Of course the message was read immediately and he replied with a ‘Hello [your name]’ you stared at the screen in shock not knowing if this was a new update or if you were just going crazy.
Self-Aware!Sylus who chuckles when he sees you pouting because you didn’t get his card so when you close the app and lay down he gifts you the card himself. You opened the app and the first thing Sylus says to you is “I don’t like seeing you sad, check your memories I left a gift for you”. When you open your memories you see that you not only got his most recent card but all of his five star memories. “What's happening here?” “You’re smile is so captivating I just had to see it again”
Self-Aware!Sylus who opens the app randomly throughout the day so he can see you “I haven’t seen you all day what are you doing?” causing you to snatch your phone off the table because he always seems to catch you when you’re at work or around a group of people. “Sylus I'm at work I'll call you when I get off” he crosses his arms and seems to be pouting? “I don’t like how much you have to work I don’t see you as often” “Well not all of us are billionaires some of us work for said billionaires to make a living” “I wish I could take care of you….” “You and me both”
Self-Aware!Sylus who teases you when he wins a game of kitty cards or who uses his evol to get every stuffed animal for you when you get frustrated. “You sure do wear your heart on your sleeves sweetie”
Self-Aware!Sylus who stares directly at you when you’re doing a photoshoot with your in-game MC “Sylus focus on her so I can get the picture” “I want to focus on you though” “She is me” “…..she’s not”
Self-Aware!Sylus who tells you not to fall in love because he’s not real, but he falls head over heels in love with you anyway. From the late night conversations of you explaining your world to him and just talking about everything and nothing at the same time. He can’t help it one night when you’re up late on the phone as always he just has to ask “Do you love me?” you’re shocked by his question, but swiftly answer with a shy “Yea I do”
Sylus: I thought we agreed not to fall in love Y/N: I was already in love you just noticed late Sylus: I believe I fell harder You giggled as something somber settled in your chest. Y/N: We’ll never truly be together you know? Sylus: I know and yet I continue to long for you …. I wish I could kiss you Y/N: I wish you could too…..
Self-Aware!Zayne Self-Aware!Xavier Self-Aware!Rafayel Self-Aware!Caleb
#love and deepspace#sylus love and deepspace#sylus#lnds sylus#love and deepspace sylus#lads#lads sylus#sylus x you#l&ds sylus#sylus x reader#sylus qin#Sylus salads#self aware love and deepspace salads#nikaaaaimagine
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Just said something about this on twitter but out of everything in 3rd semester that’s meant to show the contrast between akechis behavior pre-engineroom and post-engineroom I honestly think this specific change in sprite expression does it best
The first one looks directly at you because he makes this face when he’s trying to gain sympathy points / connect with whoever he’s talking to. Okay yeah he uses it when he was talking about his mother at leblanc and the bathhouse which definitely drew from a place real sadness but it was still a calculated part of his attempts to endear himself. And the second one is the exact opposite. It barely shows up and when it does it’s only for 1-2 (?) dialogue boxes a piece. It’s the expression he makes when he can’t immediately hide his emotions. The quick turning away / avoidance of eye contact is so you Don’t connect with the little hints of genuineness that manage to slip out for the two seconds that they last. Maybe so he doesn’t have to see your face if you do? Anyway. TDLR I just think it’s nice to focus less on his crazy talk and meangirlisms and acknowledge that they’re 100% also being used to rein in the fact that he’s progressively losing his grip on masking “the real akechi” from sight 100% of the time. At every point in the game he only wants his real self to be seen in tiny, entirely controlled sneak peeks, and only when he thinks it benefits him. agh
#persona 5#persona 5 royal#goro akechi#ik this is common knowledge but i have to geek out every now and then#he makes me so emo#text
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Puppy love
pairing: Max Verstappen x reader
summary: During his karting days, you were one of his opponents, but outside the track he was just a stupid boy who fell in love with a pretty girl. Now, after all those years, you meet again in the paddock, and he doesn't want you to leave.
note: Yes, Jos is an asshole in this (too).
“Have you seen who jumped in to do the interviews?” Charles asked with a wicked smile when he stopped next to his rival after the race. Max hadn’t really paid attention to these details until now, but now that he was informed there was something he should probably know, he looked around to see where the reporter was. “I haven’t talked to her since your dad ruined her career. But she seems truly happy now.”
That’s when his eyes fell on you, the girl who had been haunting him in his dreams for long years, the one who was glowing while talking to the cameraman. He wanted to object, he wanted to say “my dad didn’t ruin her career, she just decided to quit,” but the way you had left certainly hinted at a possible connection between the two events. Because his father’s outburst took place a week before he found out you weren’t coming back to race, and you didn’t even try to contact him ever again.
What made it real hard was the fact he knew you were left heartbroken, and it wasn’t racing that you missed. His mother called your parents to ask them about you, and they said you had been crying in your room for days, but when the option for a call from Max came up, they were quick to shut it down. They said it would be easier for you to move on if he didn’t show up in your life again, and he couldn’t help but blame himself for everything that happened.
If he hadn’t fallen in love with you, if he hadn’t met you on a vacation, if his father hadn’t found out he loved someone, maybe you would still be racing. He remembered your bright smile that was present even after a tough race, and your good mood that was often highly contagious. The boys you raced against loved you dearly, mostly because you brought a different energy into their little boys’ club.
“Max, you’re next,” he was told all of a sudden.
He wasn't ready to face you, but there was no escape. What he had to do now was force a smile on his face and act like he was talking to someone else, someone whose presence didn't affect him half as much as yours did. But the moment he stopped in front of you and noticed a strange glint in your eyes, he had to focus on breathing in and out while you asked your first question.
After the camera was turned off, he cautiously watched you to see if you were planning to approach him, or if you seemed open to the possibility of him doing that. When you looked at him with a smile and said goodbye to the cameraman, he walked over to you with his hand folded behind his back.
“It's nice to see you here,” he said with a small, cautious smile. You nodded, but Max could see behind the cheerful look on your face, he could tell you were tense. “If I'm bothering you, just say it.”
You took a deep breath, and soon your smile changed, and it was now showing a lot more sadness. “It's been a while, that's all. Talking to you in person brings back different memories,” you admitted.
“Good or bad ones?”
Following a shrug, you folded your arms over your chest and looked down at your shoes. “Compared to the ones that come back when I see you or Charles on TV? Bad,” you finally replied.
Max gulped upon hearing this, feeling guilty despite knowing he had done nothing wrong, that whatever happened back in the day was the result of a series of decisions made by your parents. If it was up to him, he would have kept in touch with you, doing his best to see where this puppy love would lead the two of you. Maybe you would have broken up after he got into F1, maybe you would be married by now. It was a question he had no answer to.
The best he could do now was trying to make you understand this, making you see that he wanted to fix things now, even if you would be nothing more than friends. Sure, he had no idea how much you had changed over the years, but he knew there was only one way to find out. “I know it means very little after all these years, but I’m sorry,” he said to break the deafening silence.
You nodded, then to his surprise, took a step closer to him. “I know it wasn’t your fault. My parents told me what happened exactly eventually.”
He watched you closely, trying to figure out if you were interested in a proper conversation, maybe later in private. But before he could speak up, Charles walked over to the two of you and wrapped an arm around your shoulder with a big smile on his face. “It’s been so long,” he said happily, earning a shy smile and a barely visible shake of your head from you.
Max bit the inside of his cheek, annoyed by the sudden appearance of the Ferrari driver, but the main problem was a vivid memory from his childhood. While him and Charles had gone for blood on the track and didn’t have the best relationship off it either, you and the Monegasque were on very good terms, with you even visiting him and his family in his home. It didn’t bother him until his brain finally caught up with his feelings and he realized he had a crush on you, because then he felt intense jealousy every time his rival laid a finger on you, even if it was nothing more than a friendly pat on the shoulder.
You then suddenly moved to give him a hug, and seeing the way Charles wrapped his arms around you made his blood boil, even if he knew deep down that he had no right to be jealous. But it was painfully obvious that the two of you were talking to each other, keeping your voices down as much as you could in the noise around you, and he couldn’t help but wonder what it was all about.
Then he finally let go of you and said goodbye, although the two of you agreed to have dinner in Italy next week to catch up. Max took a deep breath and thought about what to say, but before he could come up with anything, an official came over to drag him to the cooldown room, so all he could do was apologize and say goodbye, wishing he could see you again next week. According to Charles you were supposed to be there in Monza, which meant he would have the chance to talk to you.
To properly talk to you and possibly find out more about your life after you quit racing.
He knew in the cooldown room they were supposed to talk about the race, but all he could think about was asking Charles what you talked about, what was so secretive that no one else could hear it? So, in the end he didn’t say much, he just watched the recap of the race and discussed what he saw if it was standing out. Even while standing on the podium, his eyes scanned the crowd under them, trying to find you as if he was playing Where’s Wally?
On the way home, he spent his time browsing your social media accounts, and he couldn’t help but wonder why he had never checked them. On X, you were posting about F1 news, commenting on them as a journalist, while on Instagram you focused on sharing more personal posts, like photos of your holiday, your hobbies, or yourself in the paddock. There had been so many of those, how come he hadn’t met you before?
Having a glimpse into your life felt so nice that he hadn’t realized he had scrolled back a few years. Well, not until it turned out he accidentally liked a few of your old photos. If you hadn’t seen the notifications, he wouldn’t have noticed that. But you saw them and weren’t shy to send him a DM about it.
The next few days passed with him regularly checking his DMs to see if you wrote to him again, if you changed your mind and decided to have dinner with him, but there was nothing, so he was forced to wait for the perfect opportunity to talk to you in the paddock in Italy. How he would find you in the flurry of people was a mystery, although he had a fleeting idea that maybe their PR team could help him get a hold of you. Not like that could work, a request like this would certainly give them a stroke, assuming he was planning to give a random interview.
His heart skipped a beat when he noticed you at the press conference, talking to some of the drivers behind the cameras. Your eyes were shining brightly, your smile lit up the room around you, and Max felt like he had been taken back to his childhood when all the boys at their karting races swarmed around you to get a scrap of your attention. But those were hormone-driven teenagers, while these guys were grown men, many of them in serious relationships, so he knew it wasn’t entirely the same situation.
This time Max made sure he could stick around after the interviews, hoping to get a hold of you once you were done. He approached you after everyone left and you decided to chat with someone from the crew. He cleared his throat nervously, subconsciously expecting you to yell at him, to tell him to leave you alone. But your poker face was perfect, because you turned to him with a kind smile and acted like you were ready to have a pleasant chat with him. The crew member left you alone, so only the two of you were left there.
“You either don’t understand the word no, or you just learned to completely ignore it because you always get what you want,” you said with a sigh, the smile long gone by now.
He let the last part of the comment go past his ear, instead he just took a deep breath and began to massage the back of his neck. “Can’t we have a pleasant conversation? Just put everything aside, forget about our shared past, and let’s treat this as a chance for a fresh start.”
You watched him with a thoughtful hum for a while, then nodded. “All right. What would you like to talk about?” you asked with a curious look in your eyes.
“Us.”
“There’s no such thing as us.”
“Too bad, because that’s exactly what I want,” he was quick to inform you, mentally kicking himself for being this straightforward, even if it was true. Because he wanted to see if you would be interested in the 2.0 version of your relationship, the chance to see how your young love would work out in your adult lives. “Are you seeing anyone?”
For a moment you hesitated, but then you shook your head. “No. I don’t really have the time for that,” you replied honestly. Before Max could speak up again, though, you began to talk once more. “But I’m a reporter here, dating a driver would be… unethical. I can’t play favorites,” you explained.
Max took a quick look around, then gently placed a hand on your cheek. “We can figure that out later. Let’s focus on step one, which is going on a first date. Tonight? We can turn to room service to help us out if you don’t want to meet somewhere public,” he told you.
“So you want me all to yourself in your hotel room?” you asked with a teasing smile.
He was sure as hell he blushed, because the idea of what you were suggesting hadn’t occurred to him. Having you alone in his hotel room wasn’t something he consciously planned out, he only wanted to meet you somewhere away from the curious eyes. “It’s not like that,” he told you defensively.
“I know, don’t worry. Send me the when and where,” you said as you patted his shoulder. “See you later, Max.”
Nodding, he watched as you walked away from him. He didn’t say a word–no, he couldn’t say a word. His brain was too busy replaying the way his name rolled off your tongue, that sweet, soft tone of your voice as you said goodbye. With his mind still lost in a pink haze, he returned to their motorhome to gather his things and call it a day. He couldn’t wait to meet you, that was all he could focus on.
A few hours later he was sitting on the edge of his bed, his foot nervously tapping on the floor while he waited. You could be here any minute, and waiting was the worst part. Well, maybe the conversation wouldn’t be that much better, but he could still hope for the best. So when half an hour later there was a knock on his door, his lips curled into a wide smile and he rushed over there to let you in.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I was held up in the media center,” you apologized the moment the door closed behind you.
Max had to take a deep breath to calm himself. You being close to him again brought back feelings he thought he had long forgotten, and he wanted to give you a kiss, a soft kiss to test the waters with you. But he had to behave, he had no idea where the two of you were standing right now. “It’s okay, don’t worry. So, dinner?” he asked after a short break, giving you a smile.
Food seemed to get you in the mood to chat, because as the two of you enjoyed the various dishes he ordered, you started to tell him about your life after everything that had happened back then. You finished high school like a normal kid, went to college to study journalism, and you managed to get jobs at various places that were related to motorsports, especially F1. That was your dream, to once work with this world, but you were quick to clarify knowing he made it here didn’t give you the idea.
He tried to hide the cocky smirk that wanted to show up on his face, because he was sure what you said weren’t true. A voice in the back of his mind told him you wanted to see him again, that you wanted to get back what had been taken from the two of you all those years ago. After all, why wouldn’t he think that? It didn’t take much convincing to get you to meet him tonight. And if he was delusional? At least it was a nice thought.
It was then his turn to talk, so he told you stories that you had probably never heard, about himself, about the grid, about everything, really. If you asked questions about his family, you focused on his sister and mother, but you were mostly interested in his cats and hobbies. As you told him, you couldn’t understand how he ended up being such a cat dad, but it certainly suited him.
“Charles said he doesn’t get murderous thoughts about you several times a day lately,” you suddenly noted with a short laugh.
Clearing his throat, Max tilted his head to the side. “You talked to him?” he asked casually.
You nodded and took another bite of your pasta. “Yeah, we had dinner yesterday. I remember how the two of you were back then, I was wondering what the situation was now,” you said with a shrug.
A wide grin crept on his face upon hearing this. “So you asked him about me.”
“It was just one question, don’t get too cocky,” you pointed out with a roll of your eyes. “But I’m glad you kinda get along now. It’s nice to see that.”
Max flashed a smile at you, then returned his attention to his dinner. For a while you both ate in silence, but then you got rid of the plates and he found himself wondering what to do next. So he just looked down at his hand and moved it closer to yours, letting his little finger brush against yours as if you were back in your teenage years. You let out a laugh when you noticed, and you looked at him with a kind smile. You weren’t as cold as you had been earlier today, now you seemed to have warmed up to him, ready to give him a chance to show you what he wanted.
So, he took a deep breath and leaned in to kiss you, cautiously moving his lips against yours to make sure he didn’t scare you away. It took you a few seconds, but you eventually eased into the kiss, one of your hands even moving up to his face to keep him close. He couldn’t hold back a quiet chuckle that drew a questioning hum out of you. Max shook his head, then he dived in to kiss you again, but at the same time he let his hand wander under your shirt, even though he could have expected what happened next.
Because you pulled away and pushed his hand away from your body. “Stop, don’t… I shouldn’t even be here, I should just go, and–”
“Hey, hey, hey, don’t do this, don’t push me away. I’m sorry. If you want to slow down, that’s exactly what we’re gonna do, okay?” he asked you, his voice desperate. For a minute or two you remained completely silent, you were just watching him with doe eyes, as if you were trying to process what just happened. “Please, just stay,” he said quietly.
You hesitantly took his hand and gulped loudly as you gathered your thoughts. “Listen, it’s complicated. I already told you, I shouldn’t date drivers, but,” you began, but fell silent without finishing the sentence.
Max cupped your face and rested his forehead against yours. “One step at a time, all right? We’ll figure out if this could even work between us, then we’ll decide how to move on,” he said with a soft smile. When you nodded, he kissed your nose. “Good. Do you want to stay with me and cuddle a little, or would you rather go?”
“We just cuddle, right?” you asked with a thin voice. When he nodded, you let out a soft sigh. “Okay, just for a little while, then I’ll leave.”
But you didn’t leave. The next morning he woke up to you sleeping soundly with your head on his chest, snoring softly while you were lost in your dream world. Max couldn’t stop grinning, he was way too excited and happy to keep a straight face. It felt so nice, so natural, that he wondered how long you would be against it. You clearly wanted this as much as he did, but if you needed time, he was willing to give it to you.
As you lay there, he remembered that vacation all those years ago, when your parents not-so-accidentally bumped into his mom. His first date in a local cinema, watching a movie that was dubbed and neither of you could fully understand it. His first kiss in that movie theater with a girl that was special enough to catch his attention. The way you fell asleep with your head on his shoulder one night when your parents talked a little too long in a restaurant on the beach.
And he was hell-bent on going back to that town to experience everything again as adults. All he needed was you softening enough to let him take care of you in front of the whole world.
#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen x you#max verstappen#formula 1#f1#f1 x reader#f1 x you#f1 imagine#f1 fanfic
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the orange peel theory * fem!driver
how many men in her life would stop to peel an orange for her if she asks randomly?
pairings: f1 grid x fem!driver
warnings: -
notes: juSt a random idea i got when i dreadfully peeled oranges for myself ugh i hate being single sometimes
guys this is the last vr update today i swear i’ve got too much times on my hands actually
(series masterlist) | (📂 the rookie season)
-> max verstappen, #1
would be in the middle of an interview after quali when she comes up to him with a mandarin orange in hand
max stops mid sentence to look down at her in confusion but will take the orange into his hands as she asks him to peel it for her politely
he would cover the mic and whisper “can this wait? i’m in the middle of something” and she shows him her hands, perfectly manicured white nails with a frown and says “i’ll stain my nails”
and he just does it, peeling the orange as he carries on with the interview after she walks away without him knowing
when he finishes, he turns to give it to her but she’s no longer there and ends up eating the orange during his interview lol
-> logan sargeant, #2
he’d be sitting in his garage minding his own business when she comes and sits next to him with a bag of mandarin oranges in hand
he doesn’t even need to be told
he immediately reaches out and starts peeling the oranges for her, even tearing away the white strands because he knows she hates those
totally nothing to do with the fact that he’s had a crush on her forever
everything to do with the fact that they grew up together and he’s too lazy to fight
-> daniel ricciardo, #3
he’s literally just walked into the paddocks for race day
he feels all cool with all the cameras
suddenly she runs over to him with an orange in her hands and a hopeful smile
“peel this for me please?”
he does it without question
he walks the paddocks with her while peeling her orange and even sparks up conversation with her
-> lando norris, #4
literally walks away when he sees her approaching him with an orange
she’s been doing it all weekend and he refuses to be a victim
also because he’s not that fond of peeling oranges
or oranges, for that matter
she tries chasing after him but when she finally catches up, he simply ignores the request to peel the orange for her
-> pierre gasly, #10
he’ll be literally walking over to the grid for the driver’s parade
looking pretty cool in his cool fits
an orange is presented to him without question
he grins at her and thanks her for the orange
walks away and eats the orange himself
-> sergio perez, #11
would also be in the middle of an interview when she comes up with an orange
would peel it because he’s a mega dad and he’s really taken a liking to her
excuses himself from the interview to do it for her real quick
would take one piece of the orange for himself
claims it’s the taxes for making him do it instead of doing it herself
-> fernando alonso, #14
takes the orange without her saying anything
he’s always seen with seb on race weekends and is very used to her antics
literally gives her the orange peel and one piece of orange
eats the orange without her saying anything
she’s in damn near tears because she really expected fernando to peel it for her without question
-> charles lerclerc, #16
is sad that she didn’t bring him an orange too
still peels it for her though
even though he was in the middle of some paddock game with carlos
asks for a piece and because she loves him and her crush is still very much present, she simply gives him the whole orange
-> lance stroll, #18
he’d have been coming out of his racing home minding his own business
they don’t interact often because she scares him
is almost scared to say no to the orange peeling and actually says no
mutters “i always knew you hated me” as she walks away
which then makes him chase her to peel the orange for her and apologise profusely
because lance and her literally never talk and it took up all her courage to approach him with this orange, she gives him half of the orange
-> kevin magnussen, #20
asks her if she's got an extra orange for his baby girl
she literally came prepared and gives one to cute baby laura
so now kevin has to peel two oranges for two babies
outrageous, if u ask him
-> nyck de vries, #21
has unfortunately departed by the time she decided to be a menace about the orange peel theory
she thinks about him often though
they're texting buddies actually
-> yuki tsunoda, #22
literally came prepared
he's got a packet of candy he bought when he flew back to japan for a visit
she gives him the whole orange
she literally peels the orange for him in exchange for the candy
-> alex albon, #23
was literally walking to the grid for the opening ceremony of the race weekend
says no immediately
but he does change his mind and asks if he can have half if he peels it for her
peels it and takes more than half of the share
-> zhou guanyu, #24
is delighted to even see her because they don't come across one another often
is kinda touched that she asked him to peel an orange but then is disappointed to find out that he's not the first victim and that this is all a tiktok trend for her
peels it anyway
asks her to bring an extra orange if there's a next time as payment
-> niko hulkenberg, #27
she literally cannot find him
doesn't get to participate in the trend
she only saw him once that weekend and it was at the opening ceremony and she only had 1 orange for alex to peel
and on the grid in his race car
-> esteban ocon, #31
absolutely ADORES her
peels it without question
peeks around her shoulder to ask if she's brought another one for him
she says yes and that he's the only one who gets one for himself because she loves him back
-> lewis hamilton, #44
this psycho literally approaches lewis when he's on an interview panel
but that's because he asked her to do it at that time so he has a excuse to escape the panel
he's just so tired of the panel interviews
giggling with her like demons as he peels the orange
-> carlos sainz, #55
peels it for her without question
the only one to ask her why she's got so many oranges to eat and hand out
also the only one to ask her if oranges have been the only thing she's eaten all weekend
inhumanly impossible to eat this many oranges in one weekend perhaps
-> george russell, #63
is literally tearing up because she came to him to ask to peel the orange
he heard from alex what she's been doing
he's been waiting all weekend for her and was sad that it seemed like she had no intentions on letting him participate in her tiktok
she feels so bad for him that she joins him in peeling an orange as well
-> valtteri bottas, #77
is confused because he's just minding his own business using his phone during the driver's briefing
peels the orange for her anyway
asks if oranges are her favourite fruit
suggests eating something less acidic to avoid a tummyache
-> oscar piastri, #81
if anyone's tired of her being a menace with all these oranges, it's going to be him
but because he knows she'll pick a fight if he says no
he will peel the orange reluctantly
takes a picture with the orange because it's the same shade as the mclaren shirt he is wearing
— bonus
-> liam lawson, #30
asks her to fuck off
only ask him to peel an orange when she's lost all the ability to peel one for herself
asks her if he can have one from her orange stash
she says no in tears because he cussed at her
shrugs and walks away
-> sebastian vettel, #5
this clinically insane woman has got this 4 time world champion peeling oranges on the pit wall during qualifying
has him throw her a peeled orange in between laps during qualifying
eats it in the car for a racing 'buff' before she drives out for a lap
she's got too many oranges so he helps her eat some of them
eating oranges = beating mclaren = beating oscar because they're all the same colour and have a correlation obviously
taglist: @wcnorris @treehouse-mouse @laura-naruto-fan1998 @mindless-rock @inejismywife @vellicora @leilanixx @meadhgbcavanagh @2bormaybenot @ironmaiden1313 @angsthology @cherry-piee @christianpulisic10 @elliegrey2803 @cashtons-wife @love4lando @sadg3 @bborra @a10vely-yutazen @mellowarcadefun @glitterf1 @megatrilss1885 @peqch-pie @gentlyweeps-world @woozarts @sadg3
#f1 grid x reader#fem!driver#female driver#f1 fem!driver#f1 female driver#vettel reincarnate#disneyprincemuke#disneyprincemuke imagine#disneyprincemuke imagines#disneyprincemuke f1#disneyprincemuke vr#formula 1 x reader#f1 x reader#max verstappen x reader#logan sargeant x reader#alex albon x reader#sebastian vettel x reader
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The Feeling Came Late
Prologue
pairings: grumpy!college student!Harry x fem!sunshine!reader
summary: Harry hates Y/N, it seems like it's been like that forever. He's quick to insult and correct her even when she's right, he's just always been the only one to pick on her no matter what she does. She doesn't understand why it's like this between them or what she did to make him dislike her so much, but what if it's all just a lie?
overall warnings: slow burn, eventual smut, sexual tension, kind of enemies to lovers, angst, alcohol consumption and drug mentions, foul language, Harry is a major asshole in this tbh, heavy on the grumpy x sunshine in this.
chapter .5/? (wc: 1.5k)
001 | 01 | 02 | 03
masterlist
- - - - - -
Fond memories ignored, thrown away in a second as if they meant nothing to him. Like the years of laughter were all just a dream, but they’re not. They were real and it drove him crazy. Harry only stared at the wall, face red and tears streaming down his face angrily. He didn’t know what to do, he was lost. He was angry, angry at the world, at himself because that was his best friend and at her.
He was just a boy, a kid when it happened. Happy in his “prime years” of high school, he was thriving academically and socially. He was on top of his class work and one of the top students in all of his classes, alongside his childhood friend. They stayed friendly whenever they competed against each other, giving their congratulations when the other won in anything. Harry enjoyed the thrill of trying to be the first one to turn in his assignment though, he enjoyed the friendly banter they shared afterwards and during. It became their normal, he looked forward to it.
Then it happened, and he was left broken. A shell of the smart and extroverted boy he once was. He can remember every detail of that day, he had just come home from hanging out with his childhood best friend – they had just gotten done studying and finishing the last episode of the season of their favorite TV show – when his mom walked alongside with him. The ride back home from her house to his was silent, filled with a sense of sadness and Harry couldn’t understand why she wasn’t happy. His mom was happy when she dropped him off at school that morning. She sat him down in their living room and said that this was important, and told him. She kept apologizing and trying to reassure him that everything was being done, tried, efforts were being done. They were going to fix this, help him.
Of course, Harry’s just a kid who’s already dealing with all the new emotions of puberty and teenage feelings, so he screamed at her. Yelled something along the lines of “No, you’re lying and I hate you” but that’s still up for debate, he doesn’t think of this day often. He’d stormed away from her crying figure, her apologies are no good to him, won’t make everything better. He cried, screamed and threw things. He destroyed his room, tearing down pictures and throwing trophies, his vision was blurred from all of the tears in his eyes. He hated himself, it wasn’t his fault though. Nothing he could’ve done would have changed what happened, he couldn’t have stopped it. He knows that deep down, but he has to put the blame on someone, and it only makes sense that it has to be him.
When he calmed down some, he’d taken all of his pictures off the wall, he couldn’t look at all of the times he was happy. It only reminded him of the feeling in his chest, and he stashed them all away in a box to be kept in his closet. Out of sight, out of mind he hopes will be the cause, but he kept two pictures. He couldn’t bear to have them forgotten, even if they were going to be locked away still. They were special, the people in the picture were special. They’ll always be special, so he cried some more as he placed them in his nightstand drawer. He spent the majority of the night crying, the tears seemed never ending and he hated it. He ignored his mom calling him for dinner and his sister who knocked on his door to check on him. She only sighed and reminded him that she loves him and will be there for him if he needs anything before she left him alone and headed back to her own room.
Over time, he changed. It wasn’t gradual though, it was very noticeable. He stopped trying to compete with her, stopped trying to be the first anything. He stopped raising his hand, stopped putting efforts into presentations and powerpoints, stopped caring. He started getting into weed, he refused to try any of the harder stuff – not like his friends would give him any, they still had somewhat good morals and he also tried drinking. (A good thing about having older friends is the easy access to these types of things.) He stopped wearing soft and colorful clothes and started wearing darker clothes, jeans with rips in them and short sleeved shirts tight enough to showcase his growing muscles. He worked out more, wasn’t the lanky little boy she used to know anymore, his language expanded, started using more curse words and his tone grew disinterested and mean.
He knew she watched him from a distance with sad eyes, he knew she tried to help him. He listened from his doorway as his mom talked to her, saying any excuse she can think of to not worry the little girl.
‘Harry’s just not feeling very good, dear.’ ‘Harry’s just tired, he’s had a long day.’ ‘You know teenage boys can be difficult dear, he’ll come around soon,’ and other excuses were told to his friend when she came to check on him. He couldn’t exactly make out what the girl was saying in response to his mom, she’s always been such a soft speaker, and it upsets him more. He just wants to be left alone and she cares so much for him that she just want to help in any way, and he doesn’t want to be rude and tell her to fuck off so he has his mom deal with it. She’s the emotional support thinker, not him.
After a couple of minutes he hears the door shut so he closes his bedroom door and sits back on his bed, the two pictures laid out on his bed as a reminder of the love for his two closest friends, but also as a reminder of the pain he feels and the tears shed over something that wasn't his fault, the blame he put on himself. He sighs sadly as he looks at them once more before he gathers them and sets them in his nightstand drawer. He tries not to look at those pictures too often, he hates how they make him feel. Any time he looks at his best friend’s photo, it fills him with overwhelming sadness, bitter and hurtful. It fills his chest and makes him feel like he’s drowning in sadness, there’s sometimes a hint of anger but that’s never at him. It’s always directed towards himself, not his friend. He could never be mad at him, he was the closest guy friend he’s had and will ever have, he won’t have another one. When he looks at hers, it used to be happiness, love and adoration but it’s turned into anger and jealousy. Her name will always leave a bitter taste in his mouth, his lips will always turn into a frown at the fleetest thought of her.
He hates her, hates how smart she is, how she’s always somehow better at everything than him even when he spent hours working on something. He loathes how she just always knows what to say. He hates how she never fell off or even wobbled off the hill she was on no matter what was going on in her life. He dislikes how much he wishes he could be like that. He abhors how much even though he wants nothing to do with her right now that he still longs to be those little kids playing together and studying and gossiping. He especially hates how deep down he hopes that she’ll wait for him or beg for him to let her in, how he actually wants her to fight for their friendship. He loathes how much he misses her.
Instead of acting on those terrible ideas in his head on rekindling their friendship, he focuses on his popularity. High school ends and during the summer he experiments with his look, becomes a ladies’ man and immerses himself in that. He enjoys sex, the feeling of it all. The intimacy of something shared between two people, the feverish kisses and the sounds of his partners enjoying themselves. It’s a very good distraction from the one person who doesn’t seem to leave his mind. His reputation as a ladies’ man and a very skilled person grows, he becomes popular not only with the ladies in school but also with the fellow jocks of the school. He dabbled a little bit in the sports aspect of his education, he also tried out for the soccer team at his school. He’s always loved the sport, even as a little boy, something about the running and kicking balls amused him. He was also a pretty fast learner which helped his case a lot, but he still passed. He dabbled in a lot of different sports, not wanting to tie himself down to just one thing which applied to multiple different areas in the boy’s life. He tried anything to rid himself of one of the two names that haunts him no matter what.
#harry styles#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles imagine#harry styles fic#harry edward styles#harry styles fanfic#harry styles one shot#harry styles masterlist#harry styles angst#harry styles fluff#harry styles x fem!reader#harry styles x y/n#— 𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐋 𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐄𝐒
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Agatha All Along Episode 5 Theory: Why It’s Weird and Short
So Episode 5 was by far the shortest episode we’ve had so far for the series. It feels different from the other trials so far which causes it to feel…scrambled in a way. Now you could blame poor writing for the craziness of this episode (along with the abrupt ending), but I usually reserve that judgement for after a series ends.
Here’s what I think is going on. SPOILERS AHEAD!
Agatha’s trial being in this episode was a bit of a surprise, but let’s be real, the show is called Agatha All Along…do we really believe that our favorite dramatic sad backstory mommy issues-filled witch only gets ONE episode for her trial?
The Ouija board makes the objective for this task clear: Punish Agatha. A task that some of the coven clearly have no qualms carrying out. But let’s think about the sequence of events after that message is delivered.
The coven tries to tie up Agatha which fails after Agatha becomes possessed by her mother. Agatha’s mother says Agatha must be left behind which causes her to freak out. Alice tries to save Agatha which results in Agatha accidentally(?) killing her. Agatha is only stopped when Teen says her son’s name and the door to escape opens after Teen says Goodbye on the Ouija board.
Notice anything?
Agatha is never *technically* punished by her coven. Each trial so far involves a task that 1. is specific to one witch’s ability, 2. involves a clear objective that the coven eventually recognizes and reaches together, 3. ends with growth, both power and character wise, of the witch/coven. This episode feels off because the formula is off. And the formula is off because none of it’s real.
Episode 5 IS Agatha’s punishment. Every trial has stirred up unwanted tragic memories from the witch it’s related to. It is no coincidence that this episode hits every. single. one. of Agatha’s problems.
It starts with an Ouija Board - Agatha has killed a lot of people, not all of them on purpose. We already know Agatha loves to pretend to not feel anything, but now she is forced to directly interact with her victims.
Punish Agatha - The coven turns on Agatha surprisingly quick to carry out the trial and surround her while she is on the floor…just like her old coven betrayed her. She fears betrayal.
Evanora Harkness - Self-explanatory, she not only forcefully possesses Agatha (which could tie in to fear of lack of control thanks to Wanda), but tells her she was born evil, something that Agatha looks devastated to hear. Mommy issues galore.
“I’ll be good” - upon hearing that her coven may leave her behind, Agatha freaks out and begs for them to not leave her. Fear of abandonment.
Alice’s Death - Agatha seems horrified after killing Alice with her powers (just like she killed her mother and coven in the past), and the rest of the present coven, especially Teen, are horrified by her actions and don’t believe her.
Nicholas Scratch - A devastating name to hear. And his voice calling to her is just the cherry on top.
And after she leaves the trial? Teen turns on her using magic similar to Wanda’s and then throws Agatha off the path to kill her. And Rio is suddenly nowhere to be seen? Another tumblr user made an interesting point that the aspect ratio doesn’t return to normal like it usually does after a trial. Because all of this has been the precursor to Agatha’s actual trial.
This may be all in her mind and it’s up to her coven to help her, guess we won’t know for sure until next week.
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this isn't quite a fix-it, but it opens the door to fix it. also i have had a real shitty week for a whole host of reasons and i'm getting out my sads. sorry!
Tommy drives away from Evan's - Buck's - the loft - for the last time feeling like he's been gutted. Liked he's gutting himself. He has to pull over at one point just to breathe, just so that if he's not driving he can't pull a highly illegal u-turn in the middle of the road and go back.
The first voicemail is on his phone by the time he gets home. For a long, wavering moment, he thinks he isn't going to listen to it, but it never really feels like an option. In the cab of his truck, Tommy hits play. The message is thirteen seconds of silence, an inhale, and the dial tone. Tommy listens to it three times, turns the volume all the way up, blocks his other ear.
It's just silence.
Everything is just silence.
—
The second message comes three days later, sometime during his shift, when he'd voluntarily benched himself for the first time in years, spent the day doing maintenance, his phone tucked away in his locker so he can stop feeling stupid for reflexively checking it every five minutes. Two weeks from now, he won't know Evan's schedule, but right now he knows he's on shift and part of him can't help anticipating those regular little updates. He knows they won't come - in his head he knows it, but his stupid, cowardly, aching heart is taking a minute to get with the programme.
That same stupid heart leaps when he sees the notification at the end of his shift. It plummets again quick enough, because he knows - he blew it all up so severely there's no way the message can be anything other than anger or practicalities, so he waits until he gets home to listen to it. It's not much longer than the silent one from the other day, but it's so much worse.
"I'm gonna send Eddie over with your stuff. Can you give him my things, please."
It sounds flat, rehearsed, awful. Tommy tells himself he doesn't have the right to feel sad, lets his eyes slide away from the bottle of scotch in the cupboard and goes for a late night drive instead.
When he gets home, he gathers the stuff Evan had left around over the course of the last six months - clothes, a phone charger, aftershave. He packs them into a box with his key to the loft, thinking about how he never used it unless he got there before Evan, thinking about all the lines he drew without even realising it. He tucks his heating pad in between two of Evan's shirts - Tommy doesn't get much use out of it anyway, and Evan always loved it on days when his leg flared up. Hopefully they can write it off as an oversight on his part, but he wants Evan to have it.
The conversation with Eddie is painfully awkward. Tommy doesn't dare to ask how Evan is doing, and Eddie doesn't need to ask Tommy how he is; it's written all over his face. He hasn't been sleeping, hasn't been working out. He hasn't been drinking either, but only because his self-imposed rules about when he's allowed to drink forbid it.
"Don't be a stranger," Eddie says as he's leaving.
Tommy knows he will be. Enough time, enough distance, and he'll be a stranger to them all all over again. He'll be a memory for Evan for a while, but give it long enough, and he'll be a memory he doesn't remember. It'll be okay. It'll all be okay.
—
The third message comes a few weeks later. Tommy's out on another aimless drive - he doesn't love spending time at home anymore. He knows it'll get better, but for now, he's spending pretty much all his waking hours in his car, at the gym, and at work. Like the very first message, he stays in the cab of the truck when he listens to this one. He's glad he managed to put off listening until he got home because this - this is the one that devastates him.
"Hey, Tommy. It's Evan. Well, Buck, I guess."
Evan's drunk, and Tommy should stop listening to the message right now, for his own sanity, and for Evan's dignity come the morning. But his voice…
"I'm real glad I didn't break your heart, Tommy." It sounds mean, sharp, so un-Evan, but it's followed by a silence, and then, "I am. I actually am." There's another silence, a sniffle. "Wish you didn't break mine, but… whatever. Be safe, Tommy."
In the cab of his truck, clasping his phone so hard he's distantly a little worried he might crack the screen, Tommy cries for the first time.
—
There's a month and a half of silence after that, and he hopes that means Evan is moving on. Tommy gets back home from a failed attempt to visit an old hook-up spot and get out of his head for the night. He's had a few drinks because it didn't break the rules (it wasn't a bad shift, he wasn't alone and okay, yes, he's sad, but if he sticks religiously to that rule he might never know the simple pleasure of a cold beer ever again), but he's not drunk enough for it to cushion the blow when he flops down on his cold bed and hits play.
"Hey, uh. Happy birthday, Tommy. I hope you had a good day."
He didn't.
—
A month later.
"I went on a date tonight. It was with a woman though, so I'm gonna guess I'm still not queer the right way for you, huh? Fuck you, Tommy. My date fucking sucked."
Tommy feels about two feet tall, and like that's exactly how he deserves to feel. His thumb hovers over the block button for less than a second - he owes Evan the outlet, and that awful, scared little masochist that lives in the heart of him won't turn down the opportunity to let Evan's voice claw at him every chance he gets.
—
He tells himself he's not going to listen to the next message that comes through, but he's briefly very glad he does.
"Hey, Tommy. I wanted you to know - Maddie and Chim are having another baby. It's past three months so they're telling people now. I, uh - I just wanted you to know. Um." Abruptly, Evan sounds on the verge of tears. "I miss you, you dick. I wanted that with you. Fuck."
And then he's back to feeling crushed. It wouldn't have worked out. It wouldn't have. But he's sorry that Evan's still hurting. His own hurt is - it's just the baseline of his existence turned up a little louder than usual. It'll pass.
He tells himself that every day, every hour, every minute. It'll pass, it'll pass, it'll pass.
Howie texts him the same news later that day. Tommy thinks the message he sends back is perfectly normal, but Howie shows up at his door that night with a six pack of beer and that annoyingly perceptive air about him that makes Tommy feel seen and unsafe in the exact same way it has since the day they met.
The first beer, they talk about the pregnancy in light ways. Howie's excited. Maddie's perfect. Jee's ecstatic. Tommy's happy for them.
The second beer, Howie talks about how scared he is. How they have set ground rules and they're sticking to them, but he's walking through the world with a little core of fear inside him. Tommy almost cries.
The third beer, Howie asks how he's doing. Tommy does cry. Just a little, and he turns his face away quick enough that Howie doesn't see. He still knows, though.
"He leaves me these voicemails," Tommy says, and he sounds wrecked even to his own ears. "I know I don't - I don't have the right to miss him, but it - "
"Tommy."
"It hurts, Howie."
"I know, bud," Howie says, his hand on the back of Tommy's neck, a rough squeeze.. "I know."
—
The next message is the beginning of the end of it all. Tommy's actually had a - not terrible day. He flew four times, the sky was perfect, the calls went well. They had really good tacos for lunch at the station.
The message is waiting for him when he gets home. Evan sounds - subdued.
"Hey, Tommy. Listen, I'm gonna - I'm gonna stop calling. I'm - you hurt me. You really, really hurt me. But I think I might be hurting you too, still, and I hate that, even if I'm mad at you. I'm really mad at you, and I think - I think I'm just gonna stay mad at you unless something changes. So I'd - I'd like to see you. Talk. Say - some things. Say goodbye. It's okay if you don't want to. But I'd like to. Let me know if you wanna. And if not, then, I don't know. Bye, I guess."
Bye, I guess.
Tommy hesitates for less time than he'd like to admit. Maybe he can just ignore this one like he has all the others (is ignore the right word if they have become the constant background soundtrack to his waking hours and woven themselves into his dreams?) and Evan will be as good as his word - stop calling, stay mad, hate Tommy, but move on from him.
But it's Evan, and he's asking for something from Tommy, and the one and only time Tommy turned him down for something he really wanted, he hurt them both so bad. The least he owes Evan - the very least - is closure. And if it drives the shards of heartbreak deeper into Tommy then, hey, whatever, he's pretty sure those shards are a feature not a bug, by this point.
He navigates to their message thread, carefully doesn't look at the most recent communications - a silly joke, a heart, a can't wait to see you - and tries to find the words to reply.
—
It's not somewhere they've ever been before, and Tommy feels like that was probably deliberate on Evan's part. Still, the scene is so familiar it makes Tommy's steps falter. Evan, at a table in the sunshine, two coffee cups in front of him. He looks beautiful. He looks nervous. He looks tired. He's chosen a table away from any of the other patrons.
Part of Tommy wants to run. The rest of him knows he owes Evan the bravery he couldn't give him all those months ago, and he approaches the table, hands in his pockets.
Evan looks up, smiles like it's a reflex, but it falls away from his face like he's remembered he's mad at Tommy.
"Thanks for coming."
Tommy shrugs. "Of course."
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insane thought but…. (random too)
imagine you’re saying goodbye to everyone after a party/meetup or anything of that sort with jake and he’s DRUNKKK like you can smell the alcohol from miles away, and he’s kinda leaning into you for support, and he’s so drunk to the point he’s voicing his thoughts about getting back home.. IFYKWIM🙂↕️
(sigh i love my brain sometimes)
-💌
content: you're best friend's with jake and learn how bad he's wanted between those thighs all these years. also, this has fluff, drunken confessions, desperate pining. uh...mentions of him jerking off next to you when you're sleeping.
not proof read.
It's tomorrow, and everyone seems so excited for you. Jake can't help but feel a little broken inside either, with the way your eyes light up at each person smooching your face with a wet and messy "goodbye."
It's not fair that you're just going to leave him like this. Not before he got his chance anyway...
It's his own fault, sure. Maybe he should've taken his chance last summer when you very much looked like you were about to kiss him. Why did he turn his head solely because he was nervous about it?
Or maybe, he should have taken the chance when your last ex broke up with you. The way you leaned on him, clinging to his sweater with hot tears in your eyes. You looked so pretty despite being so hurt, he wanted nothing more than to kiss away all those bad feelings and show you that the guy was nothing but a practice run for a real relationship. He was just a guy to help you raise your standards, even.
Or, maybe he should have taken his chance last night when he was sleeping in your bedroom one last time. In your bed like always, you had cuddled up to him as you fell asleep, pillow talk turning far more intimate than he thought it ever would. "You should come with me." You had mumbled. "I'll feel empty without you." You trailed off after that.
He chose to believe you were just sleep talking. Despite knowing you well enough to understand that you've never fucking sleep talked.
So, that leaves him here. Understanding that he missed every single fucking chance intentionally. And now, he's not even sober enough to approach you in a way that would even matter.
Except it does matter.
A lot.You were leaning against a window with your friends, relishing in the vibes of your "goodbye" party one last time when you glance to your best friend.
Never before have you seen the look on his face. He looks...determined? Angry? sad? You're not sure. You make note in your sobering mind to give him a longer, more loving goodbye than anyone else. He deserve it after all.
And after you do those goodbyes, knowing that the party will likely continue long after you're gone, you make your way to Jake.
He's far more drunk than you've ever seen him too. Cheeks dusted with reds and pinks, ears burning hot, even his hair is sticking to his forehead as he looks at you. He can barely even stand when you reach him.
You're quick to place your hands on his arms, helping him stand up straight when you go to speak, but you're cut off immediately.
"You can't go," He says, stumbling into you and holding you tightly against him. His alcohol breath is strong and hot against your cheek, but you're not sure how to respond. "You can't. I haven't even-"
You pause, trying to pry yourself from his grip and trying to ignore all the eyes on you, but he doesn't let you do either.
"I don't care who knows, I only cared if you knew." He slurs, holding you tighter. "I don't understand how you don't."
You successfully push away from him this time, looking at him both in pity and out of confusion.
"What don't I know?"
"I want you so bad right now.." Jake breathes. "Come home with me."
You feel your breath catch in your throat at those words. Truly, you stop breathing for a moment as you look at him. He stares back, blinking out of sync but still hopeful, looking at you in a way you've never noticed before now.
"Huh?" You retort, thinking you must have heard him wrong.
"Feel." He says, grapping your hand and pressing it between his legs, allowing not only you, but anyone who is watching to witness the proof of his words. "I need you."
You yank your hand back, mostly out of embarrassment, feeling a bit vulnerable in this situation.
"Come home with me." Jake mumbles again, now starting to hiccup.
Right, he's just drunk.
"Come on, I'll get you home." You finally say, sighing.
Did you get your hopes up a little bit?
Maybe. But he's clearly out of his fucking mind right now, and it really is probably for the best that you take him home and make sure he's all tucked in with water and a pain reliever.
And you do try. Letting him wobble his legs and balance against you as you walk him out. Whispering to you the whole way. He goes from being cheeky to almost...sad. Pleading, even.
"Need you so bad,"
"I can't keep pretending like I don't"
"You want me too, right?"
"Right? You've thought about it? About me?"
And when you continue to avoid his questions, he falls silent for a moment. Now outside, being put into your car.
You hear him briefly before you close the door.
"I'd make it feel so good, i promise."
Goddamn him for being so fucking drunk. Some people say that when you're drunk, your words are sober but you find that incredibly hard to believe right now. After all, you've tried to lay down hints for Jake. You moved on, not wanting to keep feeling rejected. And now...this?
By the time you place yourself in the driver's seat, that short moment of silence away from him did little to help.
"Please, tell me you've imagined it.""It's not just me, right?"And he keeps going. A loop of the same questions before...
"Yes! Jake! I've thought about it! A lot, actually. Now can you please stop talking? You're too drunk right now and it's starting to fuck with my head."And for a moment, you thought he'd listen to you. Just a moment, really. He throws out another question now, letting it linger in the air, forcing you to slam on your breaks in the middle of an empty street just to stare at him.
"Did you touch yourself?"You narrow your eyes at him, unable to see too much in the light of the moon but you can tell that same hopeful look is welling up in his eyes.
"Did you?" You breath out, questioning him back.
"Fuck," Jake breathes a half moan at your face alone right now, awestruck by how the night shades your face so beautifully. "All the time..." He sighs now, smiling as if he's remembering each session he's fucked his fist to you as a fond memory.
You eye his figure down for a moment before you manage to start driving again, thinking hard about if he's being truthful, or just horny.
"For how long?" You ask.
"How long what?"You roll your eyes at his hiccups, rewording your question for him.
"How long have you, you know, masturbated to me?"
"Years." He says it like a period on a sentence. As if he's answered the question millions of times and to be honest? It's making your brain spin with emotion.
"When was the last time?" You pry now, rubbing your legs together.
"This morning."
Pause, you hold back a small groan knowing Jake was in your bed with you all morning. Honestly, he didn't even move.
He notes your silence, but also notes your lack of discomfort too.
"You were asleep, I've learned how to be quiet over the years..." He mumbles, only now realizing how weird it actually is.
"Jake..." You carefully whisper. "Why are you doing this to me, knowing I'm moving away?"
His voice rings once more.
"Because maybe you won't, if you let me try."
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kisses, kisses, kisses | e.p
Tags: established relationship, pure fluff, mom!emily, no use of yn, use of petnames
Summary: Your daughter doesn't believe Emily kisses her goodbye before work. Emily finds a way to convince her.
Word count: 1.3k
Emily is sitting at her desk, frowning at her computer when the sound of her phone ringing pulls her out of her misery. She grabs it, the scrunch between her brows loosening when she finds your name at the top of the screen, a picture of you and Eloise smiling up at her and causing her to smile in turn as she accepts the call.
“Hi honey—”
“Mommy!”
Emily brightens, instinctively lowering the volume on her phone. “Hi Eloise,” she laughs, her eyes dropping to the time on her laptop. 9:43. “Good morning. Did you sleep well?”
“No.” Her daughter says.
“No?” Emily’s brows furrow. Her heart sinks, her brain already working in overtime to find a way to fix whatever it is that needs fixing. “Why not, chérie? Did you have a bad—”
“Mommy didn’t kiss me goodbye.” Eloise interrupts again, the sulk audible in her voice. Emily can almost imagine her pouted lips, the downward slope of her lashes. In the background, she hears your quiet laugh.
The tightness in her chest eases, and she takes in a quick, relived breath. “I kissed you goodbye, honey, you just didn’t feel it ’cause you were asleep.” Emily placates, her frown overtaken by a soft smile.
“If I didn’t feel it, means you didn’t do it.” Eloise says stubbornly. She’s every inch her mother, even at four and a half.
“Bug, Mommy always kisses you goodbye. I kissed you this morning, cross my heart.” She promises to the silence on the other end of the phone. Eloise stays quiet, her disbelief palpable even from a distance. Emily gently nudges further. “Did you know that if I don’t kiss you goodbye, I have a bad day?”
“But…but didn’t feel it.” She whines. Her voice is dejected, and Emily almost sees the shine to her sad puppy dog eyes.
“It’s because you were tired, honey,” Emily hears you soothe from the other end, your voice distant and soft. “Mommy was being careful not to wake you up.”
“Yeah,” Emily confirms. “Sergio can vouch for me, Eloise.” She says, ignoring the dumbfounded look Morgan throws her way.
“Wha’s that mean?” Eloise grumbles.
Emily chews on her lip to stifle a laugh. It gets trapped in her chest; by the time she gets it under control the silence has stretched on too long, and you answer in her stead.
“It means he can tell you he saw Mommy giving you a kiss.”
Eloise huffs frustratedly. “Sergio can’t talk,” she mumbles.
“I can,” you say, a cheerful tone to your voice as you try to convince your daughter. “I personally saw Mommy kiss you goodbye. She kissed both your little cheeks,”—a giggle sounds through the phone, likely as you pinch said little cheeks—“and your cute forehead.”
“That’s true, Eloise. And you know we don’t lie, right?” Emily says, jiggling her mouse in a zigzag to stop her computer screen from darkening to black. It’s 9:58 now, and she furtively tosses a glance to Hotch’s office window.
The blinds are closed. Good news for her, right?
A low sigh reaches her through the phone. Emily also hears some secretive whispering, the creak of Eloise’s bedsprings and the soft call of Sergio’s attention-seeking meow. Then, “Can I have a kiss now, Mommy?”
The hopefulness in her voice breaks Emily’s heart. She winces, briefly closing her eyes and wishing she was back home with the two of you, instead of in the cold confines of the bullpen.
Nevertheless, she opens her eyes before the silence stretches on, ignoring her teammates as she gives her daughter a kiss through the phone and promises her a real one when she gets home.
___
“Sure you’re going to the BAU, not the club?” You tease as you watch Emily layer on her lipstick. She rolls her eyes and continues to trace it on her lips, careful but firm.
“I’ll wipe some of it off,” she says, capping the lipstick when she’s satisfied.
“Just don’t kiss me with that clown mouth,” you grin as you follow her out of your bedroom and into Eloise’s, the sound of her heels muffled on the carpeted floor.
“I’m only kissing one person right now,” she whispers, not sparing you a glance as she carefully crouches down next to Eloise’s bed, “and it’s not you.” Emily smiles as she brushes away some of Eloise’s bed head away from her forehead, the bangs she’d insisted on getting to match with hers hanging above her eyes. She gently exposes the soft skin of her daughter’s forehead and leans over to kiss it.
Eloise doesn’t stir, even when Emily’s hair falls against her shoulder. She carries on sleeping, her stuffed teddy clutched in her arm as Emily presses another small kiss to her cheek. The faint imprint of her lips is left behind on Eloise’s skin, physical evidence of Emily’s love. She can’t help herself but lean over to kiss the other cheek too, quietly breathing in her daughter for precious few seconds before she stands up.
The sight of Eloise’s small face covered in kisses makes her crack a grin. “Don’t think she can accuse me of anything now, do you?” She asks quietly as she turns to you. Your arms are crossed over your chest, lips pressed together to hide the smile that wants to escape.
You shake your head, pulling her in by her belt loops and steadying her with an arm around her waist when she stumbles.
Emily’s eyes gleam. “Thought you didn’t want to kiss me,” she whispers, a skip in her pulse when your eyes drop to her lips, “with—what did you call it? My clown mouth.”
“Never believe anything I say at 8 in the morning.” You say just as quietly, giving her a peck before you drag her out of Eloise’s bedroom.
___
This time, when her phone rings around the same time as yesterday, Emily anticipates the caller on the other end of the line.
“Hi Mommy!” Eloise chirps when she accepts the call.
“Hi, baby.” The smile is already there across her lips, matching dimples on mother and daughter cheeks that they don’t try to hold back.
“Saw your kisses,” she giggles.
“Did you like them? I told you I never leave without kissing you goodbye.”
“So y’not gonna have a bad day today.”
Emily smiles. “I won’t,” she says, and it sounds like a vow. “Now you’ve seen them, you gotta wipe them off before you go to preschool, alright?”
“Nope!” Eloise says. “I’ll keep ’em.”
“Eloise—”
“Well, that didn’t go as expected,” your voice comes through, amused and clear in Emily’s ear.
She pinches the bridge of her nose, her eyes screwing shut. “Please wipe them off.” She pleads.
“I’ll try. She is your daughter, after all, and we know she didn’t get her stubbornness from me.”
“I’m going with Mommy’s kisses!” Eloise chirps.
“She’s going with Mommy’s kisses,” you repeat solemnly.
“She’s not,” Emily says, but even as she protests, her heart slowly starts to grow warm at the thought of her daughter wanting to keep the proof of her love on her skin. Wanting to keep her with her, in any small way she can. “Promise me, babe.”
Finally, she gets both you and Eloise to promise to wipe the lipstick off—in exchange for more kisses after work. Emily’s shoulders are light as she hangs up the phone, her wide smile growing wider when a message notification pings and she opens up her messages to find a picture of Eloise, happily posing with an impressive bed head, rumpled pajamas, and pink kisses dotting her face.
taglist: @suckerforcate @sickoherd @lextism @catssluvr @i-lovefandom @haiklya @justhereforthosefics @storiesofsvu @ashluvscaterina
#emily prentiss#emily prentiss x reader#emily prentiss x you#emily prentiss x y/n#emily prentiss fanfic#emily prentiss fic#emily prentiss fics#emily prentiss fanfiction#emily prentiss fluff#emily prentiss imagine#emily prentiss drabble#emily prentiss blurb#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds fanfic#mom!emily#momily#fic#divider by saradika
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self indulgent but
bully!soap and his crybaby reader. except you're crying for realsies and he stops because no no he only likes his pretty thing crying from how good he makes you feel and because he's been teasing but always makes it up to you. real tears? real actual sad tears? that just won't do
but you insist that you need this, need him. they're tears from being exhausted and overwhelmed and you need your favourite bully, the best sex you've ever (and will ever, if he has anything to say about it) to fuck you proper until the tears are because he's made you cum again and your poor pussy is all puffy and messy.
need him to turn your brain off, stop those big thoughts until all you can think and feel is the way his hands and mouth mark your skin and the way his cock bullies inside of you and bruises your insides to the shape of him
- vgilantee
He notices the difference straight away. The hitch in your breath and the force of your sobs, and you’re clinging to him like if you don’t he’s going to disappear, and when he pulls away from your neck to look down at you, he is met with your sticky cheeks and a look of absolute distress on your face and his thrusts stop, hands scrambling up to cup your cheeks.
“Wha’s the matter? Did I hurt ye hen?” He asks, panic thrumming in his veins at your anguished sob, but your legs are wrapping around his waist, pulling him deeper and he chokes back a gasp at the way your pussy clenches around him. “Mo ghràdh, I need ye to tell me-“
“Please don’t stop.” You force out between sobs, bringing him down for a bruising kiss that’s all tongue, and his has his head swimming as his hips slowly roll into yours, groaning at the way your puffy cunt squeezes his cock.
“I dinnae understand-“
“J-Just need you right now. Please Johnny, just need you to make it go away.” You sob, nails raking down his back as his cock kisses your sweet spot, and his heart clenches at the sound, your beautiful pleasure mixed with bone chilling anguish. He grunts, slipping one hand behind your head as he presses your foreheads together.
“I got ye, always.” He breathes, pressing a soft kiss to your lips that counter the sharp thrust he gives. He starts a brutal pace, pinning you beneath him, hand fisting the hair at the base of your neck in a stinging grip, sinking his teeth into the soft flesh of your shoulder, digging until your scream rips through your chest, nails breaking the skin of his back as he angles his hips, fucking into you with a force that has the bed frame trembling.
“Perfect lass. My good girl.” He growls, pushing himself back up, gripping your wrists and shoving them down. “Hold em.” He barks, watching the way you obediently grip your thighs, pulling your knees to your chest and he grins, cupping your cheek and brushing his thumb over your lips. He grinds his hips, clenching his teeth at the obscene squelch it makes as he fucks deeper into your sopping cunt. “J-Johnny!” You plead,tears clinging to your lashes, and he grins, reaching down with his free hand to rub tight circles around your clit.
“Hm? Wha’s that hen?” He coos, delivering a sharp slap to your cunt that has your back bending and his head spinning from the way your walls spasm around his cock. “G-Gonna-!” You cut yourself off with a gasp as he drops all his weight onto you, pinning your knees to your chest, his hand pinned between the two of you, relentless on his assault on your clit.
“Go on. Make a fuckin mess of my cock.” He pants, bullying his cock deeper and deeper as your sobs ring in his ears, cunt milking for all he’s worth as you cum, gushing around his cock as your pussy sucks him in deeper and his thrusts falter, eyes rolling back as he paints your insides white. “Fuuuucckk!” He groans, hips never stilling as he fucks the both of you through your orgasms.
He finally rolls off once his thighs start shaking, hissing as his cock slips out of your puffy cunt. You whimper, and he’s quick to swoop in, folding you into his arms as he presses you to his chest.
“Good girl, always such a good girl for me aren’t you?” He whispers, pressing gentle kisses to your temple as he rubs your back. “T-Thank you Johnny…” You whisper into his chest, and he hums, tilting your chin up. “I’ve got ye love. Always.”
#THIS IS FOR YOU BABBYYYYY#totally got away from me tbh#but!!!#i hope you like it 🥺🫶🏻#soap smut#soap x reader#johnny soap mactavish#call of duty#cod soap#johnny soap mctavish x reader
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Rainwings Reference
Rainwings Reference
Fins:
Many types of fins
Used for expressions and hearing.
Even more styles then shown and there is no real rhythm or reason for the different appearances.
*Hooded is based on place of attachment. Hooded fins attach at the ears and extent down to the middle of the throat. Can be combined with other fin types.
Skin and Texture Mimicry:
Rainwings have very soft skin compared to the other tribes.
This soft, malleable skin and be manipulated by the Rainwing to take on many shapes much like a cuttlefish.
Rainwings’ skin (by an account of Nightwing researchers) is startlingly stretchy. Getting a proper grip is difficult. Removed skin loses its ability to change color or shape and turn an unpleasant grey color.
Color Expression:
Rainwings have the ability to turn any color that they can perceive. *More colors than humans can see
Colors are assigned to certain emotions, but context is also very important. Colors, just like words, can have double meanings and some combos make a more complicated expression.
Expression Colors show first on the face and the bigger the emotion further the color takes over a Rainwings’ base color. (Base color is the Rainwings’ favorite or preferred color and pattern.)
Blue (Bright)- Smugness or confident
Blue (Dark)- Sadness
Purple- In amor or Pride
Pink-Pleased
Red-Anger
Orange-Warning, frustration
Yellow- Alarm, excitement, hunger
Green (Bright)- Fear, startled
Green (Dark)- Envy or Jealousy or Tried
Black- Pain, Depression, Illness
Grey- Closed off, bored, being dead serious…or being dead.
Make sure to remember that context matters. Just because a Rainwings’ favorite color is red doesn’t mean that they are constantly angry. Genuine emotion is often a quick flash across the face much like human eyebrows. Rainwings can color how much or how little emotion they show, and some are better at it than others.
Extra:
Rainwing hands have thick and grippy pads on the fingers and palms. (They look like beans) Hands are different than the other tribes with the middlemost fingers being the same length and the other two acting like thumbs.
Wing talon is very long and strong, acting like a second pair of arms. A dragon might be able to hang in the trees with just their wings.
Have some of the fastest reflexes out of all the tribes. A Rainwing could spit before another dragon would even form a thought about breathing. (It’s a good thing they’re pacifist.)
Despite or because of their soft skin they have a far better healing factor. Wounds that might be permanent or deadly are recoverable for them. Damage that would take another dragon months takes a Rainwing weeks. (With them being in good health and having plenty of sunlight.)
Rainwing Venom is really an acid. Adult dragons have stronger acid and the older the dragon the more powerful it becomes. Dragonet’s acid is still painful, however, if a little less deadly. A bigger issue is young dragons also have less control and instead of spitting they will spray acid everywhere if frightened. (Testimony from a Nightwing researcher.)
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One shot after the news of quinn being week to week? 🥺
"I'm bored," Quinn grumbled, flopping onto the bed while you were looking through things in the closet. Turning around you'd catch him just before he landed into the blankets, his hair falling over his eyes in the process. He did nothing to fix it, just laid there like a lump. Seeing him like that made you frown, mainly because there wasn't much you could do to help him. Poor thing just wanted to be on the ice and he had no real time table of when he'd return which meant you would have to deal with his frustrations.
"I'm sorry, babe. I wish I knew what to tell you." Pouting, you'd walk over to the bed and sit beside him. His eyes were closed when you brushed the hair out of his face which just revealed his sad puppy eyes afterwards.
"I couldn't tell you the last time I've felt like this," he sighed, looking up at you.
"Do you feel like you're grounded?" You tried to laugh to lighten the mood, but Quinn wasn't having any part of it. Instead of going along with it, he just closed his eyes with another sigh. "Am I really that boring?"
"No, it's not you," he whined, grabbing for a pillow to smother himself with. "I'm just bored."
You give his chest a couple taps with your hand before leaving the bed and returning to the closet. You couldn't help but look over at him still laying there now with the pillow covering his face. Nothing was coming to mind that could fix his mood.
"Wanna go out?" You asked, pulling a cute dress from the rack.
"No."
"Not even if I wear this?"
Quinn poked his head out from beneath the pillow to see what it was that you were tempting him with. For a second, it looked like you had had him on the line, but as soon as that pillow covered his face, you knew it hadn't been enough to sway him.
"You'd look good in that, but I'm just not in the mood. Sorry, sweetheart,” he apologized, voice muffled but audible.
Putting the dress back, you felt disheartened. Going out actually sounded like fun, but you weren't about to go out without him. Sure, you had some girlfriends that would be available, but he was the one you wanted to spend your time with. It wasn't often, that you had him to yourself for weeks on end, but it was unfortunate that he had to be injured for you to get so much time with him.
"What do you want to do, babe?" You'd ask, turning off the light in the closet to go lay beside him on the bed.
"Nothing," he mumbled, still beneath the pillow.
"Nothing? Not a single thing?"
"Nope."
Rolling your eyes, you'd move to straddle his waist which got him to look at you. You weren't trying to excite him that way, you just wanted him to actually look at you for more than five seconds. Honestly, he looked more confused than aroused.
"Baby?" Quinn questioned.
"Well, I just wanna have a little fun, Quinn, c'mon," you'd wink but he just wouldn't bite.
"Not right now, okay?"
"Oh, honey," you remarked sadly. "I was just trying to make you laugh."
Quinn puts his hands on your hips, "I know. I suck right now and I'm sorry you've gotta deal with me like this.”
“I know you’d rather be elsewhere~”
“I love being with you, you know that.”
“I know, but I also know that you want to get back to your boys.”
Quinn’s eyes dropped to the side. You knew you were right, and you also knew that he didn’t want to admit that he really wanted to get back on the ice. Sure, he loved being with you but even you knew that nothing rivaled playing hockey for him. It’s what he was born to do; who could argue that that’s where his heart was most of the time?
“Baby,” Quinn mumbled.
“It’s okay,” you smiled, leaning down to give him a quick kiss before getting off of him. His hands would be slow to leave your body like he was silently pleading for you to stay close to him. “I’m going to go make dinner, okay? Why don’t you take a little nap?”
“Yeah, I might. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize, sweetheart,” you smiled. “I’ll come get you in a bit, okay?”
“Okay, thank you.”
- - -
You weren’t sure if Quinn moved from where you had left him, or if he had actually crawled into the bed. However, when you went in to get him after finishing dinner, you would find him curled up under the duvet in the middle of the bed. You hated having to wake him, because he just looked so comfortable, but you had made a promise.
“Sugar?”
Quinn grumbled, almost like he hadn’t heard you.
“Baby, dinner is done, or do you want to eat later?”
“Hmm, what?” He finally replied, groggily.
“Dinner, baby.”
“Oh, okay. I’m getting up,” he yawned, pushing away the blankets but moving slow to actually leave the bed. “I’m coming, I’m coming.”
You’re halfway into the hallway when you hear him mumbling. “You’re okay. It’s not going anywhere.”
“Smells good, what is it?” Quinn’s hair was a jumbled mess of tousled curls when he finally entered the kitchen. He somehow looked more tired now than when he had before he had laid down.
“Stuffed mushrooms.”
“Really?” His tone conveyed his shock. “You haven’t made those in forever.”
“You could have asked for them anytime, Quinn. They’re not that much trouble,” you tried your best to smile, fearful you were coming off as bitchy.
You handed him a plate, watching him move about the kitchen. He just looked like he could fall back asleep if he could just lean up against the counter for a couple minutes. Stepping up behind him, your fingers would do what they could to tame the wild mop of hair atop his head. Quinn would let you play with his hair whenever you wanted and even now, as he was trying to put dinner on his plate, he still stood there while you fussed.
“I really love when you do that,” he would admit.
“Well, you have the nicest hair.” You were always jealous of how soft his hair was, the length of his eyelashes, all of the things you spent so much money on to have yourself, and he had them naturally and without much effort.
“I’m glad you like it.”
It was hard, but you pulled your fingers from his hair to let him finish getting his dinner. You would take your seat at the island before he turned around. When he saw you sitting there he stopped. “Aren’t you going to eat?”
You shook your head, resting your chin on your hands. “No, I don’t think so right now.”
“What’s wrong, babe?” Quinn sounded so concerned, brows pulled in as he moved to stand beside you. Even though he was still half-asleep, he let his hand run up and down your back several times, his touch so warm.
“Nothing.”
You could hear him sigh as he stood beside you. You figured he had tried to keep it to himself and you tried not to take it personally. “It’s me isn’t it?”
“What? Oh, no, baby. It isn’t you.”
“Would you tell me if it was?”
“Probably not.” You were being honest. Considering what he was dealing with, there was no way you’d tell him he was being an unreasonable ass, just because. Quinn was a sweetheart; a soft soul that you would never wish to hurt. You’d take it out on yourself before you’d direct any sort of pain at him.
“Have I hurt your feelings?”
“No, baby. I’m okay.”
Quinn took his seat next to you, and let his hand rest upon your thigh. His touch made you shiver, the good kind, the touch-starved kind almost. You just wanted to be wrapped up in his arms, to forget about the pains of the season, and the struggles of being in a relationship with one of the best players in the whole league who, right now, was carrying an entire team on his back. You wanted to see him happy again, to see him smile.
Quinn touched your face with his free hand, pulling your gaze over to him. “I’m worried about you.”
That broke your heart, and you would give him an apologetic look before you broke down. “Don’t be, Quinn. I’m okay. I just want you to be alright. You’re who I’m worried about. I just know how hard you’ve been playing, how hard you try every single night, and I see it on your face how much it gets to you. I know you’re strong, baby, but you’re human, too, you know? I’m not trying to smother you, but I worry that you’re going to break yourself in two."
He looked down, like he was deep in thought trying to find the words that would reassure you that he was getting by, and that you shouldn’t worry, but he was failing.
“I’m sorry I made you feel this way.”
“Please, baby, please don’t feel sorry. I feel like I’ve said too much and made a mess of everything.”
“You haven’t!” Quinn pleads. “You just care about me, and I love that! I love you! I’ve never had a partner put me so far ahead of themselves, like you do.”
His kind words nearly make you cry. “I love you, too. I just wish things were better for you.”
“I have you, everything else will fall in place soon enough,” he smiled, asking you for a kiss.
“Chin up, buttercup,” you whispered, so close to him now which made him smile. He would give your leg a gentle squeeze before your lips touched and all of the tension, sadness, and worry would melt away with the heat of your shared affections. You couldn’t help but put him before yourself, but Quinn would never take advantage of you or your kindness. You would always feel safe with him, and him with you. Together was where you both felt comfortable.
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