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junebugsarchive · 16 days ago

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𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔 . jake kim

𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐒 𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 '𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐍𝐎𝐖 𝐈 𝐂𝐀𝐍'𝐓 𝐑𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐌𝐁𝐄𝐑 / 𝐈𝐓'𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐀𝐌𝐄 𝐃𝐀𝐌𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐌𝐀𝐃𝐄 𝐌𝐘 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝐒𝐔𝐑𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑 . . . ♡

summary: you and jake used to be as thick as thieves back in middle school, even when he became part of the notorious gang big deal. that is, until a miscommunication and jake's stubbornness leads to a heart-breaking fall out, and you never saw or heard of him until a few years later. now jake wants you back in his life, but are you ready to accept him so willingly again?

pairing: jake kim / kim gimyung x reader

details: slight mentions of harassment . cursing & violence . really, really long (wc 11.9k words, sorry everyone ) . all dividers used are from @cafekitsune, pictures from pinterest !

a/n: first ever work wowow >< this fanfic is mostly just to give u guys a taste of my writing style hehe <3 this has been in my drafts for a long time already... finally got the courage to post! hope u guys love, mwah mwah ♡

Jake Kim will never forget the day he met you. He was fifteen, in his second year at Gangseo Middle School, sleeping soundly at his desk while the teacher at the front droned on about something - he was too lazy to care anyways.

"Hey!" Someone suddenly slammed both hands onto his table, making him blink blearily, fuzzily looking up in annoyance at the culprit, ready to give them the beating of their life.

A girl grinned back down at him, her prim and neat uniform a stark contrast to the dirt and grime on the rest of the students, and the blood and cracks coating the walls of their classroom. Jake blinked at her as he straightened his back, opening his mouth to yawn. He had no idea there was a girl in this school.

"I transferred here a week ago," The girl chirped, as if sensing Jake's thoughts. "My name's [Name] [Last name], nice to meet you!"

"What do you want?" Jake asked brusquely, ignoring her introduction as he dug in his pocket for a snack, groaning inwardly when he realized that he had eaten them all already. "Go away, kid. This school isn't a place for a girl like you."

She frowned as she watched him, putting one hand on her hip as she pouted slightly. "I'm not a kid, I'm just a year younger than you!" She replied defiantly. "Besides, this was the only school my aunt could afford."

Jake raised his eyebrow at this. This girl... was intriguing, at the least. More so annoying, but Jake decided to pardon her overly-zealous attitude. "What do you want?" He repeated in annoyance, nevertheless. "If you don't want anything, go away. I'm trying to sleep here."

"Protect me."

Jake paused, just as he was about to close his eyes again, and raised his head, narrowing his eyes at the girl, who was still smiling in a carefree manner. "Excuse me?" He asked, unsure whether to be offended or weirded out by this demand.

The girl shrugged. "I'm a girl," She explained. "Well, the only girl in this school at least. My auntie couldn't afford anything else, so I had to lie to her and tell her I have a nice friend here that could protect me. Which, obviously isn't true." The girl paused here, looking straight into Jake Kim's eyes without a hint of fear or hesitance. "I can do stuff for you. Your homework, quizzes, tests, whatever. Just please protect me while I'm in this school, until my auntie can get me to transfer, then I'll be out of your hair."

Jake nearly laughed at this. This girl had the audacity to ask him to help her beat up any guy that essentially looked at her wrong, because she wasn't able to do so herself? She should've just chosen to be home-schooled, or just worked her ass off to make money at a young age instead. "No," He replied bluntly, settling himself back down onto his table, ready to doze off until the end of the day. "Bold of you to assume I want to do well in my studies, anyways. Now go away, kid. I want to sleep."

You frowned in disappointment. Sure, you weren't a hundred percent certain that the school's most notorious fighter would actually help you, but your optimistic side was really hoping that he'd agree to your crazy demands. "Ok," You relented, rummaging through the plastic bag you'd brought along with you, before bringing out a little Kuromi lunchbox and gently placing it beside the boy's head. "I brought some food, by the way. If you don't wanna eat it it's fine." You wait for a few seconds, but it had become apparent that either Jake was ignoring you, or he was already asleep. "Well, bye Jake." You left, making sure to gently close the door behind you.

You should have tried harder to convince Jake. You really should have. Because right now, you were in a super uncomfortable situation you wish you could have avoided one way or another. Found blackmail on Jake Kim to make him protect you? Nah, he'd kill you in an instant. Whine and whine and beg for his protection? Still kill you anyways. Fuck, nothing you could have done would make Jake relent.

Your eye twitched slightly as you heard the boy sat next to you call you 'sweet cheeks' for probably the hundredth time in the past few hours, then proceed to claim that you were his 'girlfriend'. Yeah, right! He was so ugly even mirrors would shatter if they saw him. Another vulgar comment about your ass made you feel like breaking your pencil. Screw being polite to potentially dangerous boys, you were ready to break this guy's arm. You cringed when the guy stupidly decided to make a move and loop an arm around your shoulder, making kissy faces as he slowly drew closer to you. You shivered in horror - this pervert was about to try and kiss you!

"Hell no." You groaned, gingerly pushing his face away from yours as you stood up, ready to get out of this hellhole. No way this guy actually thought he had a chance with you. Not with his personality.

"The fuck did you just say, bitch?" The same guy growled, slowly standing up to tower above you, the rest of the class following in suit. It was clear that he was the king in this class, and even the teacher at the front was shivering in his seat, too afraid to say anything.

"I said, hell no." You repeated, throwing all caution to the wind. "I'm not your girlfriend, so please stop acting like I gave you permission to touch me all you want."

The guy's goons began to menacingly crack their knuckles and bring out bats from god-knows-where, you were starting to regret making a scene.

"Disrespectful bitch." The leader spat out, slowly advancing on you. "And disrespectful bitches get taught a lesson." This must have been a sort of cue, because the goons began to jump over desks and chairs to run at you, fully prepared to beat the shit out of you.

"Oh fuck," You mumbled, before darting out of the class - thank god your seat was the closest to the door - speeding through the hallways while the boys behind you screamed bloody murder.

You really should have exercised more, because in a matter of minutes, you were already starting to feel stitches coming in, and wheezing pathetically as you began to slow down, giving one of the more athletic goons the chance to grab your hair, making you shout in pain as your scalp burned, bringing tears to your eyes as you struggled in his grasp, kicking and flailing like a wild animal.

"Yo, boss! I got her!" The goon shouted excitedly, grunting slightly as he kept you under his iron grip. "Stay still you bitch-!"

A loud bam made you flinch, instinctively reaching up to cover your ears. Did someone blow up a part of the school? You blink, realising the goon wasn't restraining you, before slowly looking to the wall beside you, seeing a human's head smushed into the cement, acutely aware of a person standing behind you. Slowly you look up, your face breaking out into a happy smile upon seeing Jake Kim, one hand holding the goon's head into the wall, the other holding up your Kuromi lunchbox to you.

"The food was okay," Jake said blankly, though the twitch at the corner of lips said otherwise. Letting you gladly receive the empty lunchbox from his grasp, he slowly surveyed the frozen goons, their leader at the front, before looking at the heads peeking out from the classrooms, his eyes darting towards your slightly trembling form. His eyes softened, peeling his jacket off his form to drape over you, giving your head a small pat before walking in front of you.

"I have a deal for you," You perk up upon hearing his voice, his form still relaxed as the goons in front of him shifted into battle stances, fully believing they could take him down. "You make me those lunches everyday, and I'll protect you." Without even waiting for a response (you would have said yes anyways), he immediately lunged forward, meeting the boys in front of him with a flurry of fists and legs.

The fight ended just as quickly as it had started. Jake Kim was standing tall among the unconscious bodies, his uniform bloodied but still intact. You gingerly stepped over the bodies, meeting the boy in the middle as you eyed his dirty form judgmentally, snuggling deeper into the warm jacket. "Ew," You hum. "I should wash your clothes too."

"Whatever," He replies blankly, slouching down again, his tall and prideful aura when fighting nowhere to be seen now. "Let's go. I wanna sleep." You brighten again, humming a cheerful tune as you trot after him, a skip in your step.

"Hey, what do you wanna eat tomorrow? Bibimbap? Bulgogi?" A grunt was your only response.

A year has passed since you met Jake Kim. Since Jake was being held back a year (you scolded him for this, though you were pretty sure he wasn't even listening), you were now in the same class as him, which relieved you, since you no longer had to walk past judgemental eyes from every class to deliver his daily lunchbox.

Humming a happy little tune, you halted outside your class, classroom 2-1, skidding to a halt as you nearly bumped into two tall freshmen exiting the classroom at the same time.

"Sorry," The shorter one says absentmindedly as they brush past you, the taller one's dreadlocks nearly smacking you in the face. Scrunching your nose, you poke out your tongue at them, before entering the classroom.

Jake was awake when you entered, staring silently at two packs of orange gum resting neatly on his table.

"Who's that from?" You asked curiously, watching as he slowly unwrapped one, popping the gum into his mouth, and began chewing obnoxiously. "Ooh, Jake's got admirers?"

"Just some freshmen that wanted to be head," Jake replied nonchalantly, offering one to you, which you took and popped into your mouth. "And is it that surprising I'm awesome enough to have admirers?"

"Stop being so egoistical," You grumbled, noticing the faraway look in your friend's eyes. "What, thinking about how old you are now for freshmen to be having the guts to challenge you?" Jake's gracious reply is a side-eye in your direction.

"Be right back," He suddenly hums, standing up from his seat to his full height, effectively towering over you. "Don't move, alright?" He ruffles your hair like some puppy, momentarily making you freeze up, before leaving the classroom. You sigh, shutting your eyes tightly as you plopped into your seat, which was right beside his, banging your head onto the table and covering it with your arms to hide the growing red on your cheeks. Stupid Jake Kim, you think to yourself in annoyance. Making me have a crush on him... Stupid...

Another few months rolled by in a flash. There were two new members of the Jake's Followers Squad, namely Jason Yoon and Brad Lee, who were more than happy to beat anyone up that simply looked at you or Jake wrong, eagerly accepting any and all lunchboxes you gave to them. You swear, you could give them a lunchbox with rat poison inside and they'd gobble it up in a matter of seconds.

Morning assembly in the courtyard was always boring. The principal would always ramble about how the students should be grateful for all the teachers and the equipment in the school, while the students down below slowly fell asleep one by one.

"Everyone listen up!" A teacher shouted, clearly trying to suck up to the principal. "The principal has an announcement to make!"

You groan as an old man in an expensive suit - clearly out of his salary - walked up to the podium and began his daily speech. "I wanna sleep..." You whine under your breath, as Brad and Jason nod in agreement behind you.

"Prestige, my ass." Jason yawns.

"What bullshit." Brad follows in suit.

In front of them, Jake stays quiet, shutting his eyes as he effortlessly falls asleep standing upright, making you groan as you fan yourself. Fuck this weather, honestly.

A loud creak by the entrance made the four of you turn towards it, curious to see what the commotion is about.

"What's going on?" The principal shouts in panic through the microphone. "What are you guys doing by the gate?!" His question goes unanswered as the students slowly pull the gate open. "Hey, shut the gate at once!"

Jake's eyes narrow at the sleek black limousine that rumbles through the now-open gate, and the students that bow ninety-degrees towards the vehicle. You blink; that was some surprisingly high level of standard and discipline the once-rowdy boys of this school had.

"Welcome sir!" The students shout. "It's an honour!"

The limousine's engine vroomed loudly, before it suddenly sped towards the crowd of students, who shouted in panic and quickly backed out of the car's way, only for it to skid to a halt - right in front of Jake Kim. The boy simply raises an eyebrow at the vehicle, his tall shoulders blocking your view of whoever stepped out of the car.

"Damn..." The man hummed as he stepped out of his car, circle-shaped sunglasses perched neatly on his nose as he leaned on his car, hands placed in his pockets. "It sure is hard to drive in the school zone." His eyes wander to Jake - not that anyone could tell with his tinted sunglasses.

"Good to see you," The man, Sinu Han, greets amicably. "Head of Gangseo Middle School; Jake Kim." His lips suddenly stretch into a wide grin. "Join Big Deal."

"No," Was Jake's immediate response. "I'm not going to join Big Deal."

"Whoa... so assertive!" Sinu continues smiling, unaffected by Jake's harsh rejection. "Why not?"

"I don't do thugs." He answers sharply.

"I'm not a thug."

"Bullshit." Jake was quick to reply. "Everything about you screams 'thug'."

"Damn, you got me." Sinu shrugs uncaringly, which slightly infuriated the boy.

"Stop messing with me and go." He takes a gum out of his pocket, popping it into his mouth as he chewed, blowing a small bubble. "I'm sick of dealing with you thugs." And as he brushes past the man, Sinu observes quietly as you, Brad and Jason follow quietly after him, the son of Gapryoung Kim slowing down a little to subtly look back at you, raising an eyebrow almost inquisitively, silently asking if you were okay.

Sinu Han watches in amusement as you nod your head brightly, and only then does Jake turn back and disappear into the school. "Ah, young love." He muses quietly as he turns around and heads back to his car. "Kinda reminds me of the romance of Big Deal."

To be honest, you weren't all that surprised when Jake joined Big Deal. Sure, it was a little dangerous to hang out on a street full of gangsters with the possibility of getting attacked any second, but you understood that your three friends could protect themselves.

Somehow, you found yourself wrapped up in the gang's shenanigans too. You were sort of an unofficial official member now, finding yourself managing Big Deal's finances and spending, even going as far as to help the gang put aside some money to invest in stocks. Due to your connection with Jake and Sinu, you were placed pretty high up in the ranks, as the sixth-in-command. It wasn't really high, like Jake, who was second-in-command, but everyone in Big Deal still genuinely respected you for your kindness - and home-cooked food, of course.

"WELCOME, SIR!" Everyone bowed immediately, in one swift motion, their bodies bent a perfect ninety degrees as Big Deal's Number 3; Samuel Seo smoothly brushed past in his neatly ironed Big Deal coat, a cigarette between his lips. One of members of Big Deal caught his eye, making him pause directly in front of him.

"Where's your coat?" He asked.

"I was in a rush and forgot to wear it, sir!" The member replied loudly, scratching his head nervously, knowing he was fucked.

"Is that so?" Samuel asked softly. A loud smack rang through the street as the member's face was snapped to the side, having been slapped by Samuel. "Does that mean you're not a member of Big Deal anymore?" The other members winced as they watched Samuel scold the boy that forgot his coat, said boy nodding nervously as he held his swollen cheek.

"Samuel, don't be so harsh." You frowned a little, chastising the third-in-command as you stepped between the boy and Samuel, your Big Deal coat swooshing behind you as the boy looked at you like an angel that had just descended from heaven. "It was just one time. He won't forget again, right?" You smile kindly at the boy, who nodded fervently with a grateful smile on his face.

"Yes Ma'am!" He practically shouts, bowing profusely as you nod and wave him away, before speeding off, probably to go tell his friends about his encounter with you.

"You're too soft," Samuel grumbles lowly as the two of you watch a bunch of Big Deal members crowd around him, exclaiming about how lucky he was to interact with the so-called 'Angelic Number 6' of Big Deal. "Gangs like Big Deal are all about discipline and respect. If you let him off so easily, he's going to take advantage of it."

"You're just too harsh," You repeat your words from before, rolling your eyes. "You need to chill, Samuel. It's the first time he forgot his coat, right? You didn't need to slap him so hard, I could already see the bruise forming."

"It's the third." Samuel mumbles petulantly, but even he knows better than to argue with you. For all he knew, the next meal you gave him could include a few worms for noodles.

He watches you leave, smiling and waving at every Big Deal member you come across, all of which smile stupidly and wave enthusiastically, or jaw drops and bows lower than they should, the same fervent look in all of their eyes.

Stupid girl, Samuel thinks to himself as he watches you, walking freely with the Big Deal coat hanging off your shoulders, practically unaware of the weight of your role. Walking so freely, without a single care in the world. He wishes he could be like you.

Big Deal was in its golden era for months. Ever since you, Jake and Samuel joined, profits have been soaring higher than anyone has ever seen, and no gang has decided to mess with Big Deal - except for the stupid ones.

Nevertheless, life was looking great. You had an amazing group of friends that you laughed with and ate with, your aunt was starting to earn more money, so you could afford better ingredients for the food you cooked for Big Deal.

You and Samuel, surprisingly, got along like a house on fire, something Jake wasn't too happy with, but never spoke up about. Just like you, Samuel loved money almost as much as he loved fighting, and the two of you would have in depth discussions about the best way to earn a lot of money for Big Deal while budgeting for about a hundred or so members. Despite your earlier grudges about him kicking a cute little boy named Johan out, he was quite friendly, underneath his tough exterior.

Jake, on the other hand, got along like a house on fire with Sinu, which wasn't very surprising. Sinu had a very blatant favouritism towards the boy, and wasn't shy in showing it either. You didn't appreciate the leader of Big Deal proudly favouring Jake, but you never spoke up about it either.

Admittedly, you still had that stupid little crush on Jake. Surprise, surprise, after months of being with Jake in gang, and seeing all of his sides - from the positive ones to the negative ones, you still found him handsome, deep down to the core.

Samuel didn't appreciate you fawning over Jake in front of him - and yes, he knew because you told him. He'd roll his eyes, sigh and scoff whenever you brought the name up, knowing he was up for another session of 'Oh-my-gosh-did-you-see-how-Jake-took-those-guys-down' or 'Jake-looks-even-better-today'. But he never complained, which was something you appreciated. It was easy talking to the stoic and monotonous Samuel (arguably), since talking to anyone else essentially meant they would snitch to Jake, even Yeonhui and Sinu. Samuel didn't care enough to tell Jake, but at least he cared enough to listen while you talked his ears off.

However, over the past few days, you noticed that Samuel became more prickly whenever you brought up Jake. He'd scoff - genuinely scoff, not the kind where he'd scoff but still listen, and make up some excuse to avoid you talking about Jake. Occasionally, when he'd lie that he had a phone call or he needed to check on the shops, you'd nod quietly, but stare questioningly as he walked away. You wondered what had happened between the two.

One day, your aunt called. You were strolling around Big Deal street with Samuel, the two of you noting which parts of the street needed to be cleaned or repaired, when your phone rang in your coat pocket. Pausing, you dug your phone out, clicking on the 'answer' button when you saw the caller address.

"Hi auntie, what's up?" You hum cheerfully, as Samuel pauses to patiently wait for you as well, lighting up a cigarette in the mean time.

"[Name]!" Your aunt speaks cheerfully, her happy tone making you tilt your head. She'd never sounded so happy in the years you had lived with her. "I've gotten a huge promotion. It can earn me a lot of money for both of us!" Your face breaks out into a happy grin when you hear the news.

"Auntie, that's great!" You beam, though she couldn't see it. "Should we eat KFC tonight?" Your aunt laughs, but it trails off a bit at the end. "What's wrong, auntie?"

"My new job is in another part of Seoul, so we're going to have to move away."

Your face went slack, eyes only widening slightly in shock. Samuel looked up questioningly upon your silence, inwardly noting the look of shock on your face.

"[Name]?" Your aunt asks quietly, upon hearing nothing from you. "Are you okay with it? I know how close you are to your friends here... If not it's fine, I can reject the offer-"

"No!" You say quickly, clearing your throat, before quickly regaining your composure. "It's fine, aunty. I can't wait. When do we leave?"

"This coming Friday." Your aunt replies, her tone careful to gauge your reaction. "Are you sure you're okay with it?"

"I'm fine," You say, trying your best to sound cheerful. Today was Tuesday. You only had two days, not counting today, to say your farewells. "Congratulations on that promotion, auntie! You deserve it."

"Thank you, dear." You could practically hear her fond smile from the other line. "I'll hang up now, but I'll tell you the details at home. Love you, bye!"

"Bye, auntie." You say, but the line had already gone dead. You suck in a deep breath, staring at the 'call ended' on your screen. It was dead silent for a while as Samuel observed your face.

"So," He finally says, breaking the silence. "When are you telling Big Deal?"

"Soon," You say resolutely, sighing as you ruffle your hair, suddenly feeling exhausted. "Keep it a secret from them until then, please?"

Samuel raises his eyebrow at your plea, scoffing as he puffs out smoke. "Why should I?" He asks, smirking infuriatingly. You sigh at his reaction - clearly you expected too much of him.

"I just don't want them to be sad." You finally say, a look of fondness in your eyes as you take in the street before you, a street you were proud to take part in building up to its glory. Your dearest pride and joy, Big Deal. "Jake's got a lot on his plate too, y'know? Sinu oppa's thinking of stepping down, and I heard there were talks of a guy messing up the other gangs around this area. They've got enough to worry about, they can't worry about me. They can't." You repeat the last sentence, eyes glazing over as Samuel watches you from the corner of his eye.

"It's always Jake." Samuel mutters, barely catching himself in time to glimpse you curiously looking over him.

"What?" You ask, making him quickly clear his throat and look away.

"I'll keep your little secret." He grumbles, watching your expression light up as you give him a happy smile.

"Really? Thank you, Samuel!" You rush forward, giving him a hug before gasping, checking your phone. "Oh, my auntie will be back soon! I gotta buy KFC, see you Samuel!" Without waiting for his reply, you dash away, breathlessly shouting a greeting to every Big Deal member you crossed.

Samuel Seo watches you go with a sinking heart, his expression relaxing as he sighs and scratches the back of his head, trying hard to ignore the warmth in his chest. After all this time, it's always been Jake.

You didn't show up the next day. Samuel pretends like your absence isn't a big deal, and carries on with his daily routine of supervising the members and scolding those who didn't wear their jackets. Who cares, anyways. You were probably just busy packing with your auntie to go somewhere else. It's not like he couldn't find out where you were going and visit you. He shakes the thought away, schooling his expression to one of blankness as he marks down another renovation needed to be made, strolling down the street.

Inwardly, he felt somewhat triumphant that he knew something about you that Jake didn't. Watching him go around like a lost child, asking if anyone had seen you today was quite amusing, especially more so because he, Samuel Seo, knew before Jake did.

He wouldn't miss you, Samuel reminded himself. Just another Big Deal member needing to move away. No big deal.

On Thursday, Goo Kim came. Samuel watched on as Sinu was defeated, by a teen barely older than him, with bleached blonde hair and a joker attitude. He and Jake watched over Sinu as he rested, one man's mind in a turmoil and the other a calm sea.

"Samuel," He clenched his teeth, hating how he automatically looked up at the boy.

"What?" Samuel shoots back with gritted teeth, looking back down towards Sinu.

"Where's [Name]?" Jake asks quietly, staring down at the floor with a blank expression, dark eyes a brewing storm.

Samuel looks at him for a moment, his mind in a turmoil. He wanted to rile Jake up, just a little bit. And yet... his mind flashes to your face, knowing you'd be so upset if he caused a rift between you and your best friend. Best. Friend. Samuel clenches his jaw, and makes his mind up. "Took the day off." He's careful to keep his tone neutral and casual, as if he was oblivious to how Jake was slowly getting angrier and angrier. "Said she had more important stuff to take care of."

The second-in-command nods silently, before getting up and saying he's going outside to get some fresh air. Samuel nods, and when the door closes, he lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding in, and stares down at Sinu. He thinks he feels guilty, but maybe not after all.

Outside, Jake Kim is having a mental breakdown. More important things my ass, He thinks furiously, closing his eyes to take a deep breath to calm himself down. What's more important than Big Deal that she couldn't tell me herself?

He sighs, smoothing back his hair. Tomorrow, He tells himself. Tomorrow, I'll deal with her.

Tomorrow never came.

Friday rolled past in a blur for you. Your auntie was so busy with paperwork and events, you had to help pack everything in your tiny little apartment, which had shockingly a lot of things. This took two days to pack by yourself, and on Friday, you found yourself whirled away by your aunt early in the morning to go to the train station, with no chance of saying your goodbyes. Inwardly, you scolded yourself for procrastinating your farewells, but brushed it aside as you admired the greenery that rolled past your window. You could easily text them, no problem.

When you arrived at your new apartment, it was already late at night. Overwhelmed by exhaustion, you crashed onto your new bed, not even bothering to unpack or shower, and slept soundly till Saturday noontime.

Once you woke up, you were determined to say your proper goodbyes. Grabbing your phone off the nightstand, you switched it on, clicking on Jake's chatbox before typing out your message.

[name] 🧚

hey, so sorry i didn't show up the past few days! was

super busy with stuff, i'll lyk thru call, just text me

when u have time, k? x

Seen

Jake's reply came almost instantaneously, and your brows furrowed the more you read.

jakey (gyat) 🍑

I can't believe you. What 'stuff' were you even busy with?

Why weren't you here when we needed you? I'm starting to

think you don't even care about Big Deal. And you can't even

tell me face to face? I really can't believe you, [Name]. Don't

text or call me until you can tell me straight to my face what

exactly was so important you couldn't be here with us.

Seen

This person has blocked your contact.

You can no longer text or call this person

Your brows furrowed, feeling hurt as you reread Jake's message once, twice and three times. What had happened the two days you weren't there? Clicking out of Jake's chatbox, you were determined to clear up whatever misunderstanding happened between you and your friend.

Scrolling through your contact list, you clicked on the groupchat you had made with Brad, Jason and Jerry, originally meant for when you wanted to plan Jake's birthday party last year, but ended up as a groupchat where you and the rest of Jake's loyal fanclub would discuss anything (positive, of course) related to their boss (like the memes the four of you had created regarding Jake, though you all swore never to tell anyone about them).

Boss Jake's Fanclub 🍑

president [name]

guys what happened while i was gone and why

is jake mad at me rn?

Seen by all

hello?

Seen by all

guys please tell me i really don't know what

happened

Seen by all

jason 👠

i'm kinda going against boss jake's orders

but

on thursday sinu got defeated by some guy called

goo kim and jake's mad that you didn't show up.

he told everyone in big deal to block your

number and not talk to you at all until you talk to

him face to face.

Your eyes widened as you slowly sat up in your bed, heading spinning as you slowly read through Jason's message. Sinu? Defeated? And Jake was angry that you were absent?

president [name]

i had a good reason, i swear.

im sorry i never told you guys sooner but my auntie

got a job promotion so i had to help her pack and

i left yesterday morning.

i really wanted to tell you guys about it but everyone

looked so stressed and tired i just didn't want to make

it worse.

im sorry everyone, i'll get ready to leave tomorrow to

explain everything to jake.

Seen by all

baby kwon 💗

I think it is better if you don't, [Name].

Boss Jake is very stressed right now, and I don't

think he wants to talk to anybody right now. Goo

Kim and his accomplice, Gun Park, said that we

have to pay them 100 million won every month if

we want Big Deal to survive, so everyone's very

tense right now.

I don't mean to be rude, but if you come back, Boss

Jake will be even more stressed.

brad (nail artist <3)

sorry [name].

we all miss you though.

we'll have to delete this chat bc if boss jake sees

this he'd kill us all.

Seen by all

president [name]

it's okay.

thanks guys.

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You switched off your phone, staring at the black screen blankly.

That day, your auntie had to console you nonstop as you cried your heart out, all the way until you fell asleep from exhaustion, tears still dripping down your eyes as your head hit the pillow.

A few months later, a sleek-looking Samuel Seo paid you a visit. Your aunt was out working and you were watching television while eating fried chicken when your doorbell rang.

Upon opening your front door, you were greeted with an unbelievably taller Samuel in a neatly ironed white suit, with a bunch of men standing behind him.

"Samuel!" Your face lit up as you smiled warmly at your sudden guest. "Oh wow, you've grown taller!"

"Hi, [Name]." He nods at you, the corner of his lips curling into a half smirk. "Can I come in?"

"Of course, of course!" You unlocked your door, ushering him inside as you threw a curious look towards the men still stationed outside your house. They looked strange, in well-ironed suits that didn't scream 'We believe in the romance of Big Deal'. "Do they want to come in, or...?"

"They'll stay where they are." Samuel replies dismissively, barely giving the men a glance as he looked around your house. "Nice place you got here."

"Sorry for the mess," You say apologetically as you hurriedly switch off the television and clear away your chicken. "I wasn't expecting anyone to visit. I'll get you some tea. Make yourself at home!"

Samuel sat down on your couch, watching as you bustled around in the kitchen, inwardly knowing you wouldn't treat him so kindly if you knew what news he came bearing.

"So," You plop down opposite him, pouring him a cup of tea before pouring one for yourself. "What's up? How's Big Deal?"

"Ah..." Samuel slowly took a sip from his cup of tea, the warm liquid running down his throat. "I left Big Deal."

You paused, looking up at him in shock as he set down his cup with a sharp 'clink'. "What?" You say disbelievingly, glancing down at the shiny badge on his collar, eyebrows furrowing in confusion. "But... you love Big Deal."

"Loved," he corrected, unfazed by your piercing stare. "After Sinu was defeated, I realized that frankly, Big Deal was still a mile away from what I wanted to achieve." He gave you a professional smile, smoothening his hair. "Absolute power."

"So what," You scoff, head still spinning. "Big Deal was just another stepping stone to you?"

"Precisely," He didn't even bother sugarcoating it. "And now, I'm inviting you to do the same. I know that you still think of yourself as a member of Big Deal, though Jake may not feel the same."

Underneath the table, your fists clench.

The tea in your cup has quickly gone cold.

"Join Workers. We will give you all the power and money you could ever want. We won't turn our back on you just because you need to take a few days leave without prior notice. Don't you want your aunt to stop suffering? Don't you want to live a lavish lifestyle, to have anything you want at a snap of your finger?" He leaned closer to you, and you could practically smell dirty money oozing from him. "Join Workers, [Name]. You won't regret it."

You were silent for a while, before lifting your head as you stared at Samuel, a fire burning in your eyes.

"So you're saying all I need to do is turn my back on Big Deal and join you?"

Samuel hums in affirmation, his eyes gleaming in victory. He celebrated too early.

Lifting your arm, you stand up, grabbing your cup of tea and mercilessly splashing the liquid all over Samuel, glaring at him as he calmly wiped the liquid away from his face with a handkerchief.

"Like hell I will," You grit out, eyes blazing as you set down the cup with a loud bang, before pointing towards your door, hand trembling slightly. "Get the fuck out of my house, Samuel. I'm not a fucking traitor, unlike you piece of shit."

You were half expecting him to get angry and punch you, but instead he chuckled almost good-naturedly and got up to leave.

"Alright," He says easily, brushing past you. "That's fine, [Name]. It's not like you have a gang to go back to even if you refuse my offer."

You were left there standing alone as the door shuts with a loud bang, fists trembling as you stared at the table.

A year had passed since you had unofficially been kicked out of Big Deal. You had learned to push down the nostalgia and tears that the gang had brought every time you thought about them, and buried yourself in studies. Your new school, J High, was admittedly elite and quite expensive, but thanks to the scholarship you had scored from a company called H Group, the school fees were much cheaper.

Originally, you felt extremely insecure about your background and looks, since almost everybody in J High was either good looking or rich, or in some cases, both, but you quickly adapted to your new environment, comfortably securing yourself a spot as an almost invisible girl, not too invisible for people to forget your name, but not too unique to be popular.

During your third year, your department had some interesting freshmen. The Architecture Department was known for being an all-boys department for years (until you arrived), since 1) they were mostly gang members and 2) the girls were too scared to join. But the new first years were... unique, to say the least.

Originally, you had thought they were just another bunch of rowdy teenage boys picking fights and smoking at the back of the school, but you were pleasantly surprised to hear chatter of how they were more mellow (which spoke a lot) and a boy in the first year had formed some sort of gang that apparently 'punished bad guys', called Burn Knuckles.

Your curiosity piquing, you decided to volunteer to be the Architecture Department's student guide for the first years.

The leader of Burn Knuckles, Euntae Lee, was a very amusing boy. When the teacher first introduced you to the class, you had accidentally made eye contact with him. Having read through and memorised the class roster, you gave him a warm smile, making his face go stiff as red blossomed on his cheeks. You nearly laughed, but kept it together as you introduced yourself to the first years.

You only grew closer to Burn Knuckles when you discovered that the right hand man, Jace Park, worked at the same coffee shop as you did, thus his other gang members were also frequent visitors of the cafe, once saving you from a old man that was harassing you.

"You don't touch a girl without her permission," You clearly remember Euntae Lee saying, as he glared at the man, who had tried to lean over the counter to touch your arm, and kept an iron grip on his wrist. "You're a bad guy. And bad guys must be punished."

You had thanked him profusely afterwards, making him blush and avert his eyes, mumbling for you to call him 'Vasco'. As a way to express your gratitude, you talked to the manager, and succeeded in getting chocolate milk added to the cafe's list of drinks, making Vasco's eyes sparkle when he walked in the next day, seeing the new addition to the menu. How cute.

You got along well with Burn Knuckles. Perhaps it was from your past experience with Big Deal, but you knew perfectly how to get the rowdy bunch to quieten down and listen. Of course, they loved you for your kind and unbiased nature - but they also loved your food. You grew close enough for them to comfortably call you noona.

You felt relieved when Vasco gained new friends. Of course, they were an enigmatic bunch, almost as comedic as Vasco was, but you were grateful nonetheless. At least he had friends outside Burn Knuckles - not like it was a bad thing.

Rumors were starting to circle. An illegal betting ring was starting to gain popularity, especially among students. You knew because one of your coworkers, John, had tried to borrow some money from you, though you wisely declined when he explained it was for betting.

One of Vasco's friends, unfortunately, got caught up in the betting ring. You felt pity, as you stared down at the scrawny boy in front of you, looking like he was one sentence away from weeping his heart out at his money lost.

Daniel Park, one of Vasco's friends, had called upon you late at night, requesting for your presence at a nearby convenience store. Apparently, they had been trying to help the boy get back his money, though literally nobody there was good enough at consoling him. Biting back a sigh, you tell Daniel you'd be there in five minutes.

You smile kindly down at the boy, Jiho, who looks at you like a deity descended from heaven as his tears dry up almost instantaneously. "Don't be sad, we'll help you get your money back." You say. "Did you meet the people who ran the site, though? It'll help a lot."

Jiho nods his head vigorously, smiling gratefully up at you through his thick lenses. "I did!" He exclaims in affirmation. "I know their names, too. This guy named John introduced me to the leader." You suppressed a sigh. Of course John was the one that made Jiho this messed up.

"I don't know the leader's name, but he presented me to another guy, Jake Kim." Your heart stilled. Staring at Jiho, your head swam as your breathing became uneven, the loud thumping of your heart in your ears drowning out whatever Jiho was saying. Jake Kim? There was no way he would involve himself in illegal betting rings.

"Jiho?" The boy paused in his rambles to look up at you, a small chill running up his spine as he sees the scary expression on your face, a blank yet terrifying aura around you, extremely unlike the usual kind and warm one you present people with. "What did Jake Kim look like?"

"A-ah..." He paused, recalling the brief interactions he had with the teen. "He was very tall... and he had a lot of hair gel."

Without the given circumstances, you would have laughed out loud. Of course the best way to identify Jake Kim was by his overly-gelled hair.

But Jiho watched in surprise as you trembled slightly, a wild torrent of emotions clouding your eyes as you clutch his shoulder tighter. "Noona... are you okay?"

At this point, you were acutely aware of the number of eyes watching your reaction in concern, ready to step in and console you at any moment.

"Ah..." You lift your head, any trace of your previous panic attack gone in the blink of an eye as you smile widely at everyone. "Sorry, guys. I used to know a Jake Kim, but it must be a different guy." You laugh falsely, the sound grating your eardrums. "I need to get going now, my aunt's probably worried not knowing where I am." You bid them a quick goodbye, speedwalking away from the convenience store.

Daniel Park watches you leave with furrowed eyebrows, staring at your hunched form in worry. 'Strange,' He thinks to himself. 'For a moment there... she looked hurt.'

Jace watches in sheer horror and shock as Jake Kim mercilessly pummelled Vasco to the ground, the former boy's fists soaked in blood. "Whew..." Jake hums, wiping his chin with one bloodied knuckle, sounding like he barely even broke a sweat. "You're persistent. It's impressive you managed to hang in like that." Jace clenches his fist.

"Hey, friend." Jake Kim averts his gaze to Jace, who was still standing there in shock, disbelieving. "Take him and leave."

With a start, Jace shifted his stance, clenching his fist as he prepared himself to attack, though his legs trembled in fear.

"Hm? You want to fight now?" Jake nearly laughed, teasing the big-eared boy in front of him. "Did you hold yourself back not to embarrass your boss?" Jace merely stays silent, though a word from Vasco made him pause.

"It's okay, Jace." The boy strains out, slowly getting up from the ground, his arms trembling from the effort. "I... will win."

"Y-you can't!" Jace sputters out, helping his friend up from the floor, allowing Vasco to painfully lean some of his weight on him. "Vasco..."

"I promised [Name] I would defeat bad guys." Vasco reassured, keeping his gaze levelled on Jake. "I won't disappoint her."

"[Name]?" Jake softly repeats, his fighting stance relaxing as he stared at the two boys in front of him with a faraway look in his eyes. Shit, he should've realized how familiar that determination in Tabasco's eyes were. "You guys know [Name] [Last Name]?"

Vasco exchanges a look with Jace, before simultaneously glaring protectively at Jake. "What's it to you?" Jace was the first to reply with a guarded look.

"She's someone I knew a while back." He shakes himself out of his stupor, a small, bitter smile on his face. "I should've just listened to her instead of being so stubborn."

"Here's the 100 million won for the month." Yeonhui places the last box of cash right beside Jake, her tone brusque. "Counted all of it with the girls."

"Wait, hold on." Jake checks his clipboard again, eyebrows furrowed. "We were definitely a few million won short just yesterday. Did I count wrongly?" He looks up at Yeonhui, who suddenly had a shifty look in her eyes, glancing towards the door. Dread piled in Jake's gut as he thought of the worse. "Yeonhui, what did you do?"

The woman's eyes widen. "We didn't sell our bodies or anything, you dimwit!" She whacks the man over the head, ignoring the bump that was beginning to form. As Jake nurses his skull with a small pout, she hesitates a little, looking at the empty peg with a Hello Kitty sticker pasted above it hanging on the wall. Jake recognized whose peg it was almost immediately - you used to hang your Big Deal coat on the same peg.

"We just had a little extra help." Yeonhui finally says, her tone absolute, with no room for arguments. She pauses, as if fighting herself mentally, before taking out a small piece of paper and tossing it to Jake. "Read it. I'm going to tell everyone not to come in for the next half hour, you're going to need the privacy."

And before Jake can reply, the woman had already sped out the door, shutting it firmly behind her. With nothing better to do, the man shrugs, unfolding the paper carefully. His heart drops as he reads the first line, and he has to lower the letter and stare blankly at the boxes of cash surrounding him, take a deep breath, and continue reading.

'Dear Jake', the letter read. 'I hope this letter finds you in good health. I told Yeonhui to give this to you once things have settled down, or when you find out you've magically had a few more million won than before. I know you hate me because I wasn't there for Big Deal when you guys needed me the most, and I understand if you never want to see me again. I've moved to another part of Seoul because my aunt found a better paying job, and a part of me has moved on from whatever happened between us. For all it is worth, I'm sorry I wasn't by your side to support you through this tough time. Gun and Goo sound like a pair of cruel bitches. I'm sorry I wasn't able to protect Sinu, or keep Samuel from leaving Big Deal. He came to me, a few months after I'd left, with an offer to join his new sponsor, Workers. Of course I declined; even if I'm gone, I still love and cherish Big Deal with all my heart. My coat still hangs proudly in my room, and I wash it every month!

'I'm not angry at you for acting as you did, Jake. I know that what I did, from your point of view, was wrong. I'm truly sorry. I know there's no way I can make up for what I did, but I'm trying, a little at a time, to help you. It must be tough for you, this new role and responsibilities that come with it. I'm sorry I'm not there to make it easier for you. Yeonhui's still sending me the tracklist for the 100 million won per month, and I'm still helping her calculate profits and suggest methods to increase them. Auntie's making more money than before, so sometimes I can slip in a few million won to help. I'm sorry if it's too little, I can send more if you want.

'How is everyone at Big Deal? Does Jerry still have that little pink bike of his? Has Jason bought new shoes yet? Those red ones were looking really torn the last time I saw them. Tell Brad I love the nail art designs he sends me. If Yeonhui's still crying at night because she misses Sinu, give her a hug for me. I'm happy now. Even if you choose to forgive me, don't look for me, please? We'll all be okay if we just stick to now, forever. I'm sorry Jake. I hope you can forgive me.

Yours truly,

[Name] [Last Name]'

Jake's eyes begin to water as he reads the last line. Then he finds himself rereading it from the first line again, until the tears in his eyes blur his vision and drip down onto his pants in little droplets. He stays like this for the next hour, reading and rereading, until he burns each and every word written from your soul deep into his aching heart.

Vasco and Jace shared a curious look. They've never heard their senior speak of this strange, overly-gelled up man before, but a loud laugh from nearby made their heads whip towards the noise.

"Well, this is interesting." The voice hums, as a man wearing tinted sunglasses appears, a cruel smirk on his face. The blood drains from Jake's face, and his fists clench tighter than ever. "You," he grits out, eyes blazing.

"It's been a long time, Jake. How have you been?" Gun Park asks, in an almost amicable tone.

Another year passed, and you were now an official J High graduate, working full-time at the cafe instead of part-time. The pay was much better, and the manager, a middle-aged woman, was kind enough to give you a bonus every two months, since you were one of her best and most loyal workers, which you deeply appreciated.

The illegal betting ring situation was still plaguing the back of your mind, since you had heard rumors that Big Deal's leader was now in juvenile detention, but you currently had more issues to deal with than to dwell on it forever, like how the stupid espresso machine wasn't working again.

As you wrestle with the insides of the demonic espresso machine, your mind flutters back to a few days ago, when Daniel Park had paid you a visit.

"Jake Kim" Small Daniel says as soon as he sits down in front of you. You pause in your work, turning your head towards the shorter boy to give him a close-eyed smile. But even he could see through your mask.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Daniel." You say, clenching tightly on the cup in your grasp, your words an underlying threat.

The boy's adam's apple bobs nervously, but he still stares straight into your eyes fearlessly. You falter, previously wide smile dropping as you sigh, and Daniel catches a glimpse of pure exhaustion on your face.

Setting down the cup, you motion for another worker to take over as you disappear in the back, probably to ask for a break, appearing once more as you take a seat opposite Daniel.

"You got me," You say, shrugging carelessly, though inside, your heart was thumping loudly. "What do you want?"

"You..." Daniel Park hesitates. "You know what happened to Sinu Han, right?"

You hum in affirmation. A few weeks after your disgraceful step-down, Jason had secretly paid you a visit, telling you everything you had missed, including how Sinu had sold Big Deal.

"Sinu Han's in an affiliation called Workers now, in the Second Affiliate. It's one of the Four Major Crews." Daniel Park explains, not missing a beat. "I want you to help us take down the Second Affiliate, by meeting Sinu Han."

He doesn't expect you to laugh loudly, leaning back on your chair with faux relaxation. "I'm assuming I'm not the only one you came to with this offer." You hum, and Daniel Park tenses.

"No," He admits truthfully. "I was planning on telling Jake Kim, too."

He watches as you sigh, turning your head to look out the window, a faraway look in your eyes. He follows your gaze. A group of high schoolers were outside, laughing and shoving each other playfully. The picture of adolescent innocence.

"You can make up with him," He presses stubbornly. "I don't know what happened between the two of you, but I know you guys can fix it-!"

You smile, and Daniel is taken aback. It isn't your usual carefree and heartwarming grin, more like a pained and tired one. "If only it was that easy," You mumble, mostly to yourself. "Once upon a time, I would have wanted to. But now...?" You give him a helpless shrug. "He made it clear he hates me. Why should I be the one making the effort in saving a relationship he clearly doesn't want to preserve?"

Daniel Park stares at you, with tears glistening in your eyes, and it finally dawns on him. "You liked him." He whispers, and you smile sadly back at him, not saying a word.

"I'll send you the location," He stands up abruptly, eyes still ablaze with determination. "Exactly one week from now, my friends and I will be taking down the Second Affiliate."

"Good luck, then." You hum, also standing up. "Goodbye, Daniel."

Now is exactly a week from when he paid you a visit.

Staring down at the address he gave you, you bite back a sigh as your head spins. Fuck.

"I'm leaving early," You call out to your manager as you toss your apron on the front desk. "I'll make up for it some other time."

"Alright, dear." She replies, smiling gently at your silhouette as you practically race out of the door. "Go chase that boy," She hums.

Sinu Han was happy.

Rather, he felt more regretful than happy. But seeing the gang he worked so hard to shape bowing in front of him, shouting their heartfelt greeting, even after not seeing or remembering him for three years, made his heart swell and his body feel so positively full. Big Deal was complete. But...

"Where's [Name]?" Jake freezes as he catches Sinu's mumble, as Jerry, Brad and Jason exchange nervous glances. "Where's [Name]?" Sinu repeats, louder this time, as his voice carries for miles.

His heart thumping wildly, Jake slowly looks up to see Sinu wide-eyed, afraid for the worst outcome. Shit, he thinks. If he finds out, he might lose his mind-!

"I'm here, I'm here." A melodic female voice rings out, as everyone's head darts towards the entrance of the room, wide-eyed. "Jeez, no need to get all worked up."

Jake's breath got caught in his throat.

There you were, standing at the entrance, your Big Deal coat hanging loosely off your shoulders. Hands in your pocket, head tilted as you cooly regarded your former gang.

Jake should have been happy to see you, alive and healthy. And yet...

You silently walked through the neat formation, coming to a stop in front of Sinu, not even acknowledging Jake, who was beside him. The air was tense.

"Welcome back, Sinu-oppa." You say blandly, forcing a tight smile on your face. "It's been a long time." Sinu smiles down at you, not sensing your awkwardness as he pats your head, making you freeze up.

"Thanks, everyone." He says, a single tear dropping from his eyes. "How's everyone doing-?"

"Sinu..." Another feminine voice mumbles in Japanese. "What are you doing?" Everyone turns towards the source of the voice, a small, trembling Japanese woman sitting on the couch. "You're joking, right?" She chokes out. "Stop fooling around. I'm not in the mood for this. You better cut it out." Mitsuki Sohma raises her head, a downright creepy look on her face as she shrieks at Sinu. "YOU NEED TO FIGHT FOR ME!!"

A resounding slap echoes through the room as everybody sucks in a breath.

"Cut that shit out," You glare down at Mitsuki, your hand stinging from the force of smacking her. "Stop running after a man that'll never love you. Whatever delusions you keep feeding yourself, that one day Sinu's going to marry you or something, you better force them out of your brain and flush them down the toilet before I do it for you."

Everyone around you hold their breath as they stare at you, who was still scowling at the Japanese girl, holding her cheek as she trembled violently, tears running down her face.

A chill suddenly runs through the room, and the hairs at the back of your neck rise. You slowly turn around, watching as the fearless gang you once knew part like the Red Sea, making way for a blonde Japanese man in a white coat whose face was so blank it made your heart nearly stop in fear.

Kuroda Ryuhei. You've heard of him before. The leader of an infamous biker gang in Japan, rumored to have come all the way to Korea in pursuit of a woman 'like no other'. The rumors were true, then, you think, as you silently watch him pick up Mitsuki, bridal style, carrying her over to a sofa nearby, before turning around with an unsettling smile on his face.

"Oi," Kuroda Ryuhei finally speaks in Japanese, the smile still on his face. "Who made her cry?" Nobody dared to speak, and you could feel the man's temper rise. He turns back to Mitsuki, and you glimpse his eyes becoming tender. "Hey, cutie." He hums softly. "Tell me, was it them?" He angles his head towards Jake and Sinu. "Tell me what you want me to do." And a chill runs down your spine as you hear the next sentence that comes out of this psycho's mouth. "If you want me to kill them, I will."

"I did," The words fly out of your mouth faster than you had expected. At the corner of your eye, you see Jake's eyes widen; he clearly didn't expect you to defend them like this. "I made your girl cry." Your heart thunders in your ears as Kuroda Ryuhei slowly turns to look at you, and he looks almost amused to see another girl, besides Mitsuki, in the room.

"You?" He hums. "Listen here, princess. I don't usually hit girls, but if you really made Mitsuki cry, I'm going to beat you up."

"Come at me, then." You challenge, stepping closer to the blonde as you glare straight at him. "Let's see what the great Kagiroi is made of."

I didn't mean that! You want to scream, but it's too late, as the biker's grin widens, and he pulls back his fist, prepared to punch you. You brace yourself as your life flashes before your closed eyes, and you hear the thud of flesh against fist, and you feel yourself fly back a little, but the hit never lands on your body.

The smell of gel hits you first, then the familiar warmth. And as you slowly open your eyes, you feel Jake Kim's big, strong arms wrapped around you as his bicep blocks the punch, the shape of Kuroda Ryuhei's fist still heavily dented in his coat. "Don't you dare touch her," The man downright growls, his eyes ablaze with protectiveness. You flush a little, feeling the eyes of hundreds of Big Deal members looking at the two of you in shock.

Ryuhei quietly observes the two of you, watching as Jake slowly releases you from his grasp, and you mutter a quiet thanks, the atmosphere between the two of you tense and awkward.

"Ah," He suddenly smiles, and the two of you look at him. "You're just like me and Mitsuki." You flush a little at the comparison, and glare at him more heatedly, as Jake looks between the two of you in confusion, having known nothing of what the blonde had said.

"Well, no matter." Ryuhei's smile disappears, and his intimidating aura returns. "He is willing to fight for you, no? Then I'll just kill him instead, for making Mitsuki cry." He leaps at the members of Big Deal, just as dozens of hands grab you and pull you behind the thick horde of Big Deal members, as the men protect you from the biker's wrath.

You are lost in a sea of red, black and white, the iron tang of blood burning heavily in your nostrils.

Big Deal streets smelled like home. You found yourself sat on a small plastic stool, blankly staring at the long rows of tables, filled to the brim with Korean street food of every kind. The place was abuzz; the smell of tteokbokki, ramyun, stir-fry and soju mixed together with the loud shouts and laughter of the members around you.

You shifted slightly in your seat, self conscious of the gazes trained on your body. It was no secret that you were apparently the 'Fallen Angel of Big Deal', infamous for abandoning them during their downfall. The rumors went wild, but after Jake had explained the situation after reading your letter, they grew extremely protective of keeping your namesake safe, rumored to be going around and beating anyone who dragged your name in the dirt.

Yeonhui and the girls quietly welcomed you with open arms. It was silently agreed that everyone would keep the fact that you had left for a while out of their mouths, until Sinu became a bit more mentally stable. For now, you just had to act normal around everyone - especially Jake.

Speaking of Jake... your face grows hot as you recall how he had protected you with his body from getting punched by Kuroda Ryuhei. You knew it had to hurt; his arm was slightly trembling as he checked on you, pretending like it wasn't painful to move it around.

Which is how you found yourself outside the warehouse you knew Jake would be inside. You stare at the door, mentally berating yourself for standing there like an idiot, because every time you tried to knock, your feet would just carry you away, before you walked back to the warehouse, embarrassed. If anyone had seen you, they'd think you were mentally ill.

Finally, you throw all caution to the wind and knock sharply. "Jerry, I told you not to disturb me." His familiar voice grumbles from inside. albeit slightly muffled, and you deadpan. "It's not Jerry." You say clearly, your lips twitching as you listen to the clatter of an object hitting the floor, followed by rushed scrambles of someone with worn shoes rushing for the door, and you swallow your smile as you come face to face with a disheveled, wild-eyed Jake, clearly not expecting you to visit him.

The boy breathes your name out, his eyes wide as saucers, and you shuffle your feet a little, suddenly feeling self-conscious. "Hi," You mumble a little. "You, um... weren't at dinner."

"I- yeah." Jake nods along awkwardly. "I wasn't really hungry."

"Oh," You nod along, and the silence is defeaning.

"Um... did you need anything?" Just as he speaks, panic flashes in his eyes as he struggles to explain his seemingly rude words. "I'm not trying to be rude or anything! Sorry, I-"

"It's fine," You crack a small smile. "I brought some ointment. Those hits must've really hurt." You hold up the small plastic bag you'd brought along, and Jake nods a little, smiling awkwardly as he opens the door wider to let you in.

The first thing you are hit with is how poor the room looks. You weren't kidding. The walls were peeling, the cabinets were rusty, the light was flickering on and off, and the rugs were so brown you never could have imagined that it used to be royal blue - unless you were the one that bought it.

You clicked your tongue as you pulled out a char to sit beside Jake, digging through your bag of first aid supplies. "Do you not clean this place anymore? How irresponsible of you."

Jake cracks a small smile as he watches you unscrew the lid of your ointment, scooping out some of its contents, fondness shining clearly in his eyes. "I can't seem to do anything without you by my side, I suppose." He says softly, shyly testing the waters.

It works, he thinks, as he sees your movements falter and your ears burn red. "Don't test it." You warn, but Jake knows there's no real bite behind your words. His smile grows wider.

The two of you fall into comfortable silence as you tend to his wounds, as Jake admires your soft face and beautiful features. Fuck, he was an idiot for letting you go. Maybe it was the post-fight haziness, but he felt like he was on cloud nine just with your touch.

Feeling his gaze on you, you look up from beneath your eyelashes, and Jake nearly has a heart attack. "What?" You say shyly, tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear.

Jake thinks he wants to start over with you. He wants to start his life with you. And as he searches your eyes, looking for the confirmation he needs that, just maybe, you felt the same way too, he decides to pop the question.

"Forgive me?" He whispers, and you gulp, acutely aware of how close his face suddenly was to yours. Your mind goes blank. Even after years, he still looks so good, he's able to make your heart flip and butterflies dance to Moonlight Sonata in your stomach.

Who cares about the past, You think hazily, smiling a little as you remember one particular memory. "Yeonhui told me you cried for an hour after reading my letter." You whisper instead, shifting your face away as you close the lid of the ointment, bending down to place it back into the plastic bag as you bring out a roll of bandages.

You enjoy watching as Jake's face falls from the corner of your eye, content with torturing him just a little bit more. "I told her not to tell anyone," He groans, running a palm down his face.

"Mm, I don't think so." You dance around him with your words as you begin to wrap his scar-littered arms, acutely aware of the muscles flexing beneath your touch. "Practically the whole of Big Deal knows, even without Yeonhui saying anything. She may have only told me, but even a fool could guess."

He watches you quietly, a tinge of playfulness in his voice as he replies. "Well, I guess I'm a fool for you." He replies, and you snort. Jake's face positively lights up, and you are immediately reminded of a puppy being told 'good boy'.

He is silent until you finish wrapping the bandages, before whispering once more, "Forgive me?" You tie your plastic bag up, straightening your back to stare directly into Jake's hope-filled eyes.

And finally, you crack a smile, and the charming grin on Jake's face spreads wider. "I thought it was obvious I've already forgiven you?" You murmur with a small smile.

And when Jake Kim leans forward to kiss you, fireworks explode and swan perform mating dances in your brain.

#lookism #lookism x reader #jake kim #jake kim x reader #kim gimyung #kim gimyung x reader

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prodagustd · 25 days ago

Text

surprise | myg

this is an extra chapter of the so it goes series.

—pairing: rapper!yoongi x reader

—rating: +18

—genre: established relationship, ex fwb, angst, fluff

—warnings/tags: implied smut, lots of angst, fluff, subtle talk about aborti0n, DON’T trust my poor knowledge in contraceptive methods and use condoms!! english is not my first language btw

—words: 7.6k

a/note: this is proof that if you ask me enough, I'll finish writing my wips!! it's been a long time but I finally get to post the surprise drabble I've been planning and it makes me sososo happy to come back to this couple 😭 I missed them so much I just hope you missed them as much as I did!! BTW I was planning to post this after two other drabbles, so if you read any additional information it's because this was intended to be posted after that, but i wanted to post this so badly😭 so here it is!! hehe anyway enjoy!!

A few years ago, when you and Yoongi were beginning to be a thing and you still lived with your best friend, Nayeon, while he lived alone in his big apartment, he picked up this habit of begging you to stay the night with him every time you visited, even though he knew you couldn’t. You used to say no, trying hard to ignore the way he kissed your neck and sneaked his hands under your blouse while explaining that, if you said yes, he was willing to wake up early and drive you to your first class the next day. You'd think that after the first or maybe even the second time he tried this, the effect would wear off, but you ended up agreeing every single time.

Back then everything was so new to him, he couldn’t remember the last time he liked someone that much, he didn’t know what was happening to him and why he wanted to spend every night with you, why he couldn’t keep his hands off you. Sure you were pretty, sure you were beautiful and funny, and your lips tasted like strawberries and you looked at him like one else ever did, maybe it had something to do with that, who knew? The only thing he knew was that he felt like a teenager everytime you kissed him, or every time you ran your fingers through his hair or every time you were naked under him, or on top of him, or anywhere close to him for that matter.

It took Yoongi a few hits, ten drunk nights and way too many days to realize that you were the only thing that he needed, that the world only made sense if you were by his side.

With time, Yoongi learned to kiss slowly, to make love slowly, to take things with ease; he learned that you were going nowhere, but there were still those moments where he felt he couldn’t get enough of you; like tonight, to be exact.

You were sure that in the last four years of dating Yoongi you had made it clear enough that you were a city girl, and you were certain your boyfriend knew that. You loved the noise and the chaos—the people bumping into each other on the streets, the busy days and nights. It wasn’t something you planned to give up anytime soon; this was the perfect time in your life to embrace the city's hustle. You’d have plenty of time for a quiet life when you got older.

Yoongi liked the city too—he enjoyed the view from his apartment window and the convenience of ordering food at any hour of the night. But he also loved road trips and sleeping in the middle of nowhere in a tent, bonfires, fishing and swimming in lakes. Yoongi had always been into camping, but instead of planning a trip with his good old friend Seokjin, who didn’t mind sleeping in a tent and loved fishing, he invited you—someone who hated bugs and couldn’t stand the idea of walking more than three minutes to find a bathroom.

You were still trying to decide whether not being able to say no to Yoongi was a problem, but it was his last free week before going back on tour. When he looked at you with starry eyes and asked you to go on a trip with him, which included spending the last two days sleeping in a tent, you couldn’t say no.

It was only two days, you were sure you could endure not sleeping in a proper bed for that long if that made him happy, you made the effort of not complaining just for tonight, after all you only had tickets to go visit him on tour in exactly five weeks, you were going to miss him.

It was easy not to complain when Yoongi’s plans for your last night together were exclusively romantic; he cooked for you, built a campfire and spent the rest of the night stargazing until it was too cold to be outside, and when you were inside the tent he made sure to have hot water bags under the blankets, but they were no use when he was determined to get you naked.

Did you mention that it was still winter?

Now you were trapped in a tent with him, straddling him as he kissed you deeply and gripped your thighs, begging you to ride him against your lips. That was when you started to complain.

You felt your whole body shivering when Yoongi’s warm hands pulled your t-shirt over your head, leaving you almost naked. You hugged your torso, attempting to cover your breasts as you sat straight on top of your boyfriend, who was comfortably laying on the sleeping bag, fully clothed.

“Yoongi, I’m cold.” You whined.

“C’mon, it’s going to wear off” He tried to convince you, rubbing his palms over your shoulders to keep you warm. You shook your head, laying your head on his still clothed chest as he covered your bare back with the blanket. It was easy for him to say that when he was wearing sweatpants and a long sleeve t-shirt.

You knew that Yoongi was already missing you. He was fully aware that after tonight, he wouldn’t see you for a whole month and he wanted to make it last as long as he could, to hold you and kiss you as much as you let him. He had gotten too used to you—used to sleeping and waking up next to you, having you all to himself—but it became a problem every time he had to leave for work, it was impossible not to miss you. You still had texts, calls and FaceTime, but he was also taking into account time difference, work, and the fact that all of that wasn’t the real thing. And if you were honest, you were already missing him too.

“What if I catch a cold?” You mumbled over his shirt.

Yoongi kissed the top of your head, running his hands down your bare back and sending chills to your spine. How was he able to get you almost naked but you didn’t even get the chance to take off his t-shirt? “It’s not that cold.” He said, not willing to give up.

You raised your head to look at him, frowning “Says the person who’s still fully clothed.”

He huffed, flipping you over to leave you under him. Suddenly, warmth rushed over you as you felt his body hovering over your frame. He was quick to take off his own t-shirt, trying to make you happy, but he quickly realized that maybe you were right, it was fucking cold, but he wasn’t going to back down.

“Happy now?”

“No, it’s freezing out there!” You kept complaining “Why do we have to do it without clothes? I don’t mind clothes, I actually think that doing it while being dressed is quite hot.”

You threw your arms around his neck, bringing him closer to you. Even though you were in fact turned on from the kissing and grinding session you had a few moments ago, you still were thinking about the logistics of fucking inside the tent.

Yoongi scoffed, amused. “And I actually think that you being naked is quite hot, too.” He said, sneaking his face in the crook of your neck to trail down little kisses, nibbling the skin softly. “C’mon, baby. I won’t see you for weeks, let me make love to you.”

You tried not to roll your eyes. “You had been using that excuse the whole trip.” And you’ve fallen for it every time. His plans for this trip were very simple: fishing, camping and fucking you on every opportunity he had. It was not like you were against it, it has been a long time since you and him had time only for the two of you.

“But isn’t it true?” He gazed up, looking at you with his soft eyes, his hair falling like a curtain on his face. “I’m gonna miss you.”

You took a second to observe the tenderness of his features, to take in the softness of his voice, and for a moment there you knew why it was so hard to say no to him, you just didn’t want to say no.

You closed your eyes, scrunching your nose. “We are gonna make such a mess.” You whined, but he just chuckled, knowing he won.

“I’ll take care of it, I promise.” He said with a soft voice, reaching for your lips as he roamed his hands towards your chest. You didn’t exactly know how he was going to “take care of it”, but his hands were gentle, the kiss was slow and when he opened his mouth to let his tongue slip past your lips, you were too into it to keep protesting about it.

As you sat on the cold bathroom floor of the home you shared with Yoongi, you tried to remind yourself of two basic things that you hoped would stop the sinking feeling in your chest. First, three weeks without Yoongi never killed anyone, this was something you knew from experience, Yoongi’s job demanded him to travel all the time, you were used to it, or at least you were supposed to be. Second, you were an independent woman (right?). You have been an independent woman since you were eighteen when you moved to Seoul alone, since you started a new life in a new city on your own. You woke up at six am everyday, worked hard your whole shift, paid the bills every month and managed to keep your house in order every day of the week. Sure, you loved Yoongi, and he loved you, and you could never imagine a life without him, but you didn’t need him, you wanted him. He wasn’t an extension of you, you were your own person, but why did you feel like the world was about to end right now if he was not there?

Crying your heart out like a five year old kid, you remembered the only time you had to take a pregnancy test, and how it looked nothing like this.

Four years ago when you and Yoongi still didn’t kiss in front of your friends, when he still thought twice before holding your hand in public but still had the nerve of sneaking in your bed. That seemed like a hundred years ago, a universe away, but no, it was not too long ago when you were stubborn and kind of irresponsible for agreeing with him as he kissed your neck and ran his hands down your thighs while asking you if it was okay for him to “pull out” that night, since both of you completely forgot about condoms. You winced at the memory, but in your defense, you were too far gone to say no, take a cold shower and kiss him goodnight. You agreed only for that night, but three weeks later you were three days late and losing your mind, the only logical thing to do was to take a pregnancy test that, of course, came negative, but to this day you couldn’t shake the anxious feeling that you felt in your stomach those minutes before the negative sign appeared, and you couldn’t forget how pale Yoongi’s face turned when you told him about it.

And now you were there, one hand covering your face while the other held a pregnancy test—only this time, it was positive.

The one on your hand wasn’t the only one, no. There were two other positive tests laying on the floor in front of you, and even if you wanted to not trust the results, they couldn’t be all wrong, right? The plus sign was very clear in each one of them and you were five days late. The problem was that you were on the pill, you had been on the pill for the last couple years and this never happened to you, this wasn’t something normal or a simple mistake.

You breathed out, trying not to panic. You got up on your bare feet to look at yourself in the mirror. You were a mess, that was not a surprise at all, your face was all swollen for the amount of time you have been crying and your hair was a big nest above your head. You washed your face, attempting to remain calm and evaluating your options. You glanced at your phone resting on the sink, and an overwhelming urge to call your mother surged within you, but as you imagined how the conversation would go, you quickly realized it wouldn’t be a good idea.

Your mother was not nosy, but she could be a little dense, a bit complicated, and it was not what you needed right now. You were sure that calling her while having a mental breakdown was going to drive her crazy, and consequently, drive you crazy too. She would want to know every single detail, date, place and hour to understand the situation better, and you would have to explain something you didn’t even understand yet. You could imagine the conversation, she would try to explain every contraceptive method like you were a teenager and ask why you didn’t use a condom, because you knew she would ask, and you didn’t want to explain to her how you went on vacation with your boyfriend to have a bunch of condomless sex, the thought alone made you want to vomit.

Calling your mother was not an option, not only because talking to her on the phone was complicated enough, but because she was in a different city, which brought you to discard calling Nayeon too, who was on vacation with her boyfriend (yes, boyfriend, that sounded ridiculous to you, too.)

The last option was something you couldn't even fathom doing unless you were desperate, but you know what they say, desperate times call desperate measures, so you blew your nose, brushed your hair and called the only person in this city who would come running without asking any questions, Jungkook.

Breaking the news to the person in front of you wasn’t easy, especially when the words you needed to say were as unreal as they sounded. You didn’t look much better, you spent the next thirty minutes that Jungkook took to arrive crying, as Holly, the brown fluffy dog, looked at you like you just went mad, the worst thing was that you weren’t far from it. It was difficult to keep it together when your mind refused to look at the bright side of things, when you couldn’t call your mom and Yoongi was in another country, but when Jungkook rang your bell and entered through the door, you tried your best to smile at him and act like you weren’t in the middle of a mental breakdown.

Your act wasn’t convincing, your friend looked at you like you were about to tell him that you killed someone and you needed help to hide the body.

You would have never recur to a man other than Yoongi for this kind of situation, but you decided to trust your ten years of friendship with the man in front of you and hope that he could be of any help.

“You are what?” Said Jungkook, standing in the middle of the living room with his eyes wide open, trying to understand the meaning of your words.

There, in your pajamas and your hands on your hips, you closed your eyes shut, sighing. “Jungkook…” You said through gritted teeth.

“I’m serious.” He said, letting his backpack drop to the floor. “I crossed half the city to get here, are you not kidding me right now?”

“I’m serious, too!” You whined “I’m not kidding, I don’t know what to do.”

He slowly approached you, walking towards the couch to take a seat. He suddenly felt his blood pressure dropping, his stomach sinking and his mouth dry as if he was the one developing a human organism inside his body. “Are you sure?” He murmured. “Are you not having one of those crises you had when you were a teenager? I remember that time in college when you freaked out when you thought you were pregnant because some guy-”

“Jungkook, I’m sure.” You interrupted him, already knowing the whole story, but this time it was not just you overreacting. “My period is late and I took three tests, all positive.”

He gulped, letting the room fall silent for a few seconds as both of you contemplated what that meant. You knew he was trying his best not to freak out, so you were grateful for his reaction, at least he didn’t faint like you expected him to do, but he was still white as a sheet, trying to find a solution in his head as though you had told him he was the one who was going to be a father.

“What are we gonna do?” He said under his breath.

“What am I gonna do?” You corrected him, sitting next to him “You are supposed to help me.”

Jungkook took one hard look at you, looking terrified. “How?”

“God, I shouldn’t have called you.” You rolled your eyes.

“No, I mean, what do you want to do?” He said. “Did you tell Yoongi?”

“Of course not.” You replied, feeling your eyes getting teary, but still trying to hold back.

“Do you want to… tell him?” He continued to ask.

You sniffed “I mean, I don’t know how.” You pouted “I’m seeing him in two weeks, I don’t know if I can wait that long.”

He threw himself back against the couch, sinking in the cushions. It was like Jungkook’s life flashed before his eyes, how come he was discussing this with you right now? He still felt like you were kids, there was no way you were pregnant right now. “How did this happen?” He murmured to himself, looking at the blank wall in front of him.

“Is it necessary for me to explain it?” You cried, snuggling closer to him as you rested your head on his shoulder.

“Did you not use condoms?” He scolded you like he was your mother.

You shifted your weight uneasily, eyes darting down to your socks. “We don’t… use condoms.” You cleared your throat, the words coming out hushed and hesitant. “I’m on the pill, I don’t know what happened.”

On second thought, that wasn’t something Jungkook wanted to know. It was like finding out how his parents had sex, he squirmed at the thought, shifting in his place. “Can you not call your doctor?” He suggested, his voice laced with uncertainty.

You paused, considering it. It was probably the most logical thing Jungkook could say, but you weren’t sure if your doctor could do anything about it.

“Even if I call her and tell her what's going on, it’s not like I can get a refund.” You huffed, a dry smile tugging at your lips.

He raised an eyebrow. “Well…” he began, dragging the word out. “In some way, you could get a refund.” You blinked at him, opening your eyes wide in surprise. “I mean only if you want to!”

You were so nervous you wanted to laugh. It wasn’t like the thought didn’t cross your mind for a moment, but only when you tried to evaluate your options; if you were being honest, you couldn’t see yourself getting rid of the baby—or whatever organism had been living rent-free in your body for the past three weeks. Jungkook looked terrified that you might explode at him, especially when it seemed like you were on the verge of tears, but his question made you think, if you didn’t want to get rid of it, what was that you wanted to do?

You sank your shoulders, feeling completely lost. “That’s the problem.” You murmured “I don’t know if I want a refund.”

Jungkook stood still for a moment, his eyes softening as he watched you. His thoughts swirled, trying to grasp the weight of your words.

"Would Yoongi want a refund?" He asked, his tone lighter than before, but the sincerity in his voice was unmistakable. Despite the attempt at humor, his eyes betrayed the concern he was masking with the joke.

A shaky exhale left your lips, the weight of uncertainty pulling you down. “I don’t know…” Was the only thing you could say.

“But do you know if Yoongi wanted… kids?” He said as if that was a forbidden word. “I mean, do you want them?”

It wasn’t like you didn’t know what Yoongi wanted. You sighed, suddenly remembering all those times when the idea of a family came up in conversations, between drunken thoughts, before falling asleep, at dinner with his parents and on the ride home when he apologized on his mother’s behalf when she asked when you were going to give her grandchildren. His soft eyes, his hand on your tight and the view of the future laying in front of you like a promise. The thought warmed your heart for a moment, but the truth was that there was a difference between talking about it and actually having kids.

“We’ve talked about it…” You admitted. “But we’ve never planned it, let alone now that he’s on tour.”

Jungkook hummed, still thinking.

“But you both agreed to have kids at some point.” He affirmed, and you just nodded.

It was in that moment where you realized you were crying again, tears slowly falling down your cheeks as you stood in silence, contemplating the overwhelming weight of the situation.

“Fuck, don’t cry.” Jungkook said, rushing to wrap his arms around you, he enveloped you in a tight hug. As soon as you buried your face into his chest, something inside you gave away. You began sobbing against his hoodie, the tears flowed freely and uncontrollable, unable to hold yourself back. “C’mon, it’s okay, you’re okay. Nothing bad’s gonna happen.” His voice was soft but firm, holding you tightly. He pulled back just enough to look at you, his thumb gently wiping away a tear from your cheek, his gaze filled with nothing but concern. “You don’t need to have it all figured out right now. Let’s go step by step, okay?”

You nodded, feeling like a kid lost in the mall. “Okay, if you want to see him as soon as possible, you have to change your flight first.” He said, but you shook your head, trying not to panic.

“He’s going to ask why.” You said, your voice hoarse “What am I going to tell him?”

He kept silent, his eyes fixed on a distant point as he was trying to come up with a solution.

“Let’s not tell him.” He proposed.

“What do you mean let’s not tell him?”

“I’m leaving for tour next weekend, you should come with me and not tell him.” He kept going “Say that you missed him and you wanted to surprise him or some shit like that, and when you get him alone you talk to him about this.”

Now you were reminded that Jungkook had to leave to join Yoongi on tour in just a few days, you completely forgot about that. It was not like you couldn’t get on an airplane alone, but if your friend was going to be there you were sure it would make things easier.

You couldn’t believe it. After so many years you were there, sad and upset and still with the same idiot as a friend, willing to follow whatever plan he was going to make for you. You didn’t know if the plan actually sounded good or you were losing your mind for listening to Jungkook.

“Jungkook, Yoongi texts me all the time, he facetimes me everyday. It’s impossible to travel to another country without him noticing.”

“It’s not impossible, I’m gonna help you.” He insisted “If he texts you, you say you’re at home, if he wants to facetime you, you say you’re busy, turn off your location, it shouldn't be difficult.”

“It is difficult, what if he realizes I turned off my location?” You groaned, running your finger through your hair exasperatedly.

“You say it stopped working or something! C’mon, I thought you were smarter than me.”

You threw yourself back against the couch, crossing your arms on your chest, it was almost comical that you were considering the idea. Your friend could sense the hesitation in every move you made, he could only hope that you agreed because his mind couldn’t come up with another idea if his life depended on it.

“Jungkook, if he suspects anything…” You raised a finger, digging it on his chest.

“He won’t suspect a thing,” He affirmed confidently. “When have any of my plans ever gone wrong? Never. Trust me, by the time you get back home, you’ll have already decided to name your baby after me.”

You rolled your eyes, unable to hide your laugh and punching him in the arm playfully. The tension was still there, and you still felt an inexplicable ache in your chest that wasn’t going away anytime soon, but being there with Jungkook made you feel that this wasn’t the end of the world, nor of your life, but the beginning of it.

Jungkook's plan wasn’t the master plan he had been bragging about the whole airplane ride, but it worked. A few days later, after a few calls and arrangements to change your flight, after another three mental breakdowns and several crying sessions in the shower, you had somehow arrived in Berlin without Yoongi suspecting a thing. You had managed to dodge facetime calls and weird questions, maybe Yoongi missed you so much that he didn’t have time to question why you couldn’t wait two more weeks to see him when you arrived at the hotel and hugged in the hall, because, if he were honest, he couldn’t wait two more weeks to see you either.

Yoongi was happy with the surprise, you went to see his show that night and after arriving to his hotel room he made love to you like he hadn’t seen you in a year, kissing your neck, grabbing your waist, murmuring things in your ear, saying how much he loved you, how much he missed you. For a moment it was like nothing changed, the two of you sharing what happened these last three weeks tangled between sheets, laughing between kisses as you ignored why you were there in the first place.

“You can’t keep spending time away from me.” He said, hovering over you as he left a small kiss on your lips. “I’ll keep you in my pocket if it’s necessary.”

You sighed, knowing that you couldn’t keep this a secret for much longer, but for tonight, you’ll let it slide.

You didn’t know when you were returning home, but you promised yourself that before leaving for the next city, you would have to break the news to Yoongi, which was becoming more difficult by the second, because if you were good at something, that was procrastinating. It was absurd, a few days ago you were crying because all you wanted to do was to have your boyfriend by your side and now you couldn’t even look him in the eye without feeling like you were about to throw up, and your mind wasn’t helping at all. All those doubts invaded your head, attempting to drive you crazy, making you believe you were not ready to tell him yet.

Three days later, when you finished the last show in Berlin, Jungkook gave you a knowing look as you were leaving the arena holding Yoongi’s hand. He knew that you haven’t said a thing to Yoongi yet, he was all over you like he was your mother, asking you if you were okay, if you needed anything, when you were going to tell Yoongi, it almost made you regret telling him, but you knew he was right.

A night was all you needed, just one night to gather your thoughts and practice what you were going to say. You couldn’t keep declining glasses of wine forever, you could only hope no one noticed how weird you were acting, how sensitive you were since you stepped foot out the plane. Time was running out; you knew that when Yoongi invited you to an after-party before the whole crew left Berlin. Instead of telling him the truth, you simply said you weren’t in the mood to go, hoping that your time alone would help to gather enough courage to confess.

You weren’t trying to keep Yoongi with you, you told him a million times that he should go without you and that there was no problem with it. You hid under the blanket and hugged your body, watching him change his shirt into a black tee. He ran his finger through his hair in an attempt to tame it, looking at himself into the mirror and stealing a glance towards your reflection. He knew you too well not to notice the sad expression on your face as you scrolled through your phone, searching for a Disney movie to watch while he was out. He turned around, approaching the bed and kneeling beside you to catch your eyes.

“Are you sure you don’t want to come?” He asked once again.

“Yeah, I just need one night.” You said, which was true. You needed a few more moments to finish fighting with your own thoughts.

“But are you okay?” He continued to ask, cupping your jaw in his palm.

“Of course, why wouldn’t I be?” The words came out of your mouth with more emotion than you intended to, he couldn’t ignore it.

“I don’t know… You look like you want me to stay.”

There was a beat of silence in the room. The sweetness of his voice broke your heart into a million pieces. You couldn’t say yes and make him stay just because you were feeling down and you really had no problem with him leaving, but you didn’t have the heart to tell him no either. You were full of contradictions, wanting to be alone but wanting to be with him at the same time, something in your chest pulled, wanting him close.

“What makes you think that?” You murmured, fighting the urge to cry. God, you were too sensitive.

“Mmm… The Disney movie kinda gives you away.”

You huffled, playing with the fingers of his hands without looking at him. “I don’t want to ruin your fun… You should go, I mean it.”

He scoffed “You won’t, there’s going to be a bunch of parties until the tour ends, this one is nothing.”

“They’ll miss you…”

“You’ll miss me, too.”

“But do you want to stay, though?” You asked him a whisper.

“Of course I want to… But you have to let me choose the movie.” He warned, automatically making you giggle.

Letting Yoongi choose the movie was the worst decision you have made in the last week so far, but you felt grateful he couldn’t see you as he hugged your waist and rested his chin on your shoulder, because as the ending of Inside Out approached, you were sure you were about to cry.

When you arrived at the airport you promised yourself not to cry anymore, not in front of Yoongi at least, but your body was full of emotions you didn’t even know you could feel. It was certain that you’ve always been a sensitive person, you cried at the drop of a hat, Yoongi was familiar with that, but now it was impossible to stop it.

You’d stopped paying attention to the screen entirely; one by one, your darkest thoughts crept in, pressing heavily on your chest. The feelings you’d tried so hard to bury rose up, churning uneasily in your stomach, and when you least expected it, tears began to fall down your cheeks.

A sob escaped from your lips at the same time the main character began to cry, making your boyfriend shift in his place.

“Are you crying?” Yoongi suddenly asked, softly grabbing your shoulder to turn you around. He looked at your face, at first amused, thinking you were crying because of the movie. But his expression softened when he saw the sadness in your eyes and the damp lashes heavy with tears. You covered your face, unable to hold back, and the sobs came harder, each one swallowing the words you couldn’t say. “Hey, hey, what’s wrong?” He reached for your arms, attempting to pull them away from your face, but you turned away, burying your face in the pillow.

“Nothing,” You lied, desperate to avoid this conversation again. “I’m just… emotional, I don’t know.” Your voice cracked, hoarse, as the emotions you were trying to hide slipped through.

Yoongi was confused, but mostly worried. You had been weird since the day you arrived, he would be a fool not to notice.

He turned the light of the lamp on the nightstand, illuminating the room with a soft orange light and turned the tv off.

“Hey, look at me.” He softly said, brushing your hair with his fingers, it only made you want to cry harder. “I know something’s up, I’m not a dummy.”

You turned to him, hitting him with the most heartbreaking sight he could witness, your face soaked in tears, nose and eyes red as you pouted at him. What was so wrong to make you cry like that?

“What do you know?” Was the only thing you could say, daring to be upset at him when he hadn't done anything wrong.

He frowned at your tone. “Well, I know that you suddenly came here two weeks earlier just because. You are weird, you almost don’t eat, your suitcase is almost untouched like you’re going to leave anytime soon, you look… sad? I don’t know, baby, you tell me.”

You kept silent for a second, wiping the tears with the sleeve of your t-shirt. Uncomfortable, you sat in the bed, taking a deep breath as your mind completely blanked. You didn’t realize yet, but there was no way to get out of this one.

Contrary to popular belief, your boyfriend was kind of a dummy. You confirmed it when he decided to say the following words.

“Is it because of Lily?” He said, making you dart your eyes at him. “You don’t like her being here?

You couldn’t blame Yoongi for not understanding why you were crying, but the suggestion that you were jealous of one of his coworkers made you want to punch him. Lily was one of the new producers at Yoongi’s label, and a few months ago, Yoongi had noticed that you were starting to feel uneasy about the amount of time she was spending with him, which led him to realize that you were beginning to feel unexpectedly jealous of her. Yes, that was a whole deal back then, but it was water under the bridge now; the fact that she was touring with him and the boys didn’t faze you. The idea that he thought you were crying because of her was ridiculous.

“Yoongi, are you kidding me?”

“No, I’m not.” He defended himself. “The last time I saw you we were fine, but now you’re here crying and I don’t have a clue what I did wrong.”

Suddenly, you felt your heart sink. He hadn’t done anything wrong; it was you who was an emotional wreck, struggling to keep your feelings in check. A wave of guilt washed over you for the mess you’d just created, convinced there must have been ways to prevent all this conflict. But now, all you could do was sit there, tangled in the aftermath of your own emotions.

You sighed, defeated. “You didn’t do anything wrong.” You said “And it’s not about Lily, I couldn’t care less about that… It’s just that- … Yoongi…”

“Baby…” He said in the same tone as you, “What is it?”

As Yoongi’s gentle question hung in the air, you felt a knot tighten in your chest. The truth sat heavy on your tongue, you glanced away, fidgeting with the edge of your sleeve, buying time as your thoughts spiraled. “Yoongi, my period is late.” You confessed, observing Yoongi’s eyes go wide, his brows lifting in surprise as he tried to understand what he just heard. “It’s been a week now, I don’t know what happened. I tried to wait, but I had to take a test”

“A test?” he asked, voice low, surprise flickering in his eyes.

“A pregnancy test, Yoongi.” You said, trying not to roll your eyes. “I took three damn tests.”

“And what-... what happened?” He asked, his voice unsteady, eyes fixed on yours.

The room felt suddenly smaller, the air thick with unspoken fears and questions. A quiet stillness settled between you both, there was a weight to the silence, stretching out the seconds as you waited for whatever words would come next.

“I mean, guess what happened,” you whispered. Before you could finish the sentence, you got up and reached for the zipper on your suitcase pocket. Your hand closed around the large object, and you felt his eyes on the back of your neck, following you as you moved around the hotel room. Returning to the bed, you sat down and handed him the pregnancy test.

Yoongi didn’t know anything about pregnancy tests—he’d never needed to. He’d always been careful, using protection with every girl he’d been with, including you, until things had started to get serious. So no, he wasn’t familiar with the variety of pregnancy tests out there. But now, here he was, staring at a white stick with a tiny screen, showing a clear positive sign, which could only mean one thing.

Yoongi’s hands trembled slightly as he held the pregnancy test, his gaze locked onto the tiny screen, staring at it for a moment, speechless. His heartbeat thundered in his ears, loud enough that he thought you might hear it. Now everything made sense, how you said you were nauseous in the morning, each time you refused to drink wine, how you looked like you were about to cry when you saw a stroller with twins this afternoon at the park. How could he not notice?

You pressed your lips together, feeling the familiar sting of tears welling up once more. A small, shaky hiccup escaped your lips, breaking the silence and snapping him out of his daze. “No, no, no,” He murmured urgently, setting the test aside and pulling you close, lifting you effortlessly onto his lap. His arms wrapped around your waist as you buried your face in your hands, trying to hold back the tears. “Hey, there’s no reason to cry,” He whispered, gently guiding your face up, his fingers lifting your chin as he coaxed your hands away. “C’mon, look at me.” His voice was soft, reassuring, his gaze full of warmth and understanding.

“I don’t know how it happened.” You blurted out, your voice shaking with uncertainty.

“That doesn’t matter now, why didn’t you tell me?” He asked, you could tell he was trying to remain calm by the soft tone of his voice, but his face had gone as white as paper, like he’d just seen a ghost.

“I arranged the flight to see you as soon as possible, but... I was scared. I didn’t know what to say. I still don’t,” you admitted, your words barely a whisper.

“Baby, you don’t have to be scared, okay? You can tell me anything.” He assured you, his hand gently squeezing yours. But the uneasy feeling in your stomach refused to go away.

“I know, but… we haven’t planned for this,” you murmured, glancing down. “It just… came out of nowhere.”

“Well, it didn’t exactly come out of nowhere. These things can happen,” he said gently, a faint smile tugging at his lips. You groaned, burying your face in his chest.

“But it wasn’t supposed to happen,” you whined, your voice muffled against him. “I didn’t expect this at all. I was drowning in work when I found out. I’m stressed, I’m lost, I don’t know what to do… and I miss my mom.” The words tumbled out in a frantic ramble, and you were so caught up in your thoughts that you didn’t even notice the soft laugh he let slip.

“You miss your mom?” he asked softly, careful not to upset you further.

“Yes!” you cried, voice cracking. “I feel like a kid lost in the supermarket.”

He shook his head gently and brushed away your tears with his thumbs, pulling you closer. “Baby…” he began, his tone soothing.

“Yoongi…” you whispered, lifting your head to meet his gaze. His expression was still worried, but the warmth in his eyes was reassuring.

“You’re right, we didn’t plan this. But we’ve talked about it before, and you have options. Whatever you choose, I’ll be right here beside you, no matter what. You know that, don’t you?” He searched your eyes for confirmation, and you nodded, feeling the ache in your chest begin to ease.

As his words sank in, a new wave of emotions stirred inside you. The weight of worry and loneliness began to ease, replaced by a warmth that softened the ache in your chest.

“But… what do you think?” you asked softly. You knew that whatever you decided would ultimately be your choice only, but you needed to know what was going on in his mind.

He sighed, a hint of hesitation in his expression. “I mean… we’re not sixteen, baby. We’re adults, we’re about to buy a house together, and we love each other.”

“Well, those are just facts,” you replied, searching his face. “What I mean is… do you want this, now?”

It was hard for Yoongi to believe you were really asking this. There you were, sitting on his lap with swollen eyes and a red nose from crying, asking him if he wanted to start a family with you—as if that hadn’t been his dream all along. Of course he felt like the life he had been living was going to completely change from now on. It was terrifying, but he couldn’t help but feel excited at the same time.

“I've always wanted it, are you serious?” He laughed, the sound light but filled with disbelief. “And I only want it with you, haven’t I made it clear enough?”

Those were the main differences between the two of you: while he was calm, always taking a moment to think before acting, you were emotional and, more often than not, let your feelings take control of your actions. It was only in that moment that you realized how irrational you’d been. There wasn’t a world where Yoongi didn’t want this, and there certainly wasn’t a world where you didn’t want it either.

“I want it, too,” you whispered, your voice trembling as you fought back tears.

“Then why are you crying, huh?” he asked gently, squeezing your face in an attempt to lighten the mood.

“Because...” you said, struggling to catch your breath. “Maybe you didn’t think it was the right time... You’re on tour right now.”

He frowned, his expression softening with concern. “I won’t be on tour forever...”

“I know, but... we’re not married. What would your parents think?”

He let out a laugh, clearly unable to believe that was a real concern of yours. “You’re not seriously thinking about my parents right now, are you?”

“How could I not?” you said, raising your eyebrows. “What if they force us to marry? God, I don’t want to be one of those couples who only marry because the girl is suddenly pregnant!”

He laughed even harder, shaking his head. “Oh my god, baby, no one’s forcing us to do anything!” He grinned, clearly finding your worry amusing. “If we ever get married, it won’t be because anyone pressured me. Trust me.” He paused, happy to see that the worried expression abandoned your face. “Besides, my parents love you, you have no idea how happy they’ll be once they know. Married or not.”

“Yoongi, it can’t be that simple.”

“But it is.”

You sighed, feeling like all the mess you’d made was for nothing—and thank God it was. You’d been so caught up in your own despair that you hadn’t realized everything in your life was falling into place for this to happen. Yoongi was right. You were about to move into a bigger home, you had your job, Yoongi had his, and you loved each other. You've always wanted it, this was the perfect moment for this to happen. Why had you been so worried?

“You’re right, it is.” You finally admitted, letting your body rest against him.

Yoongi laughed, gently grabbing you by your hips and laying you on the bed, kissing you softly. “You don’t have to worry, baby, not with me.”

“I know.” You breathed out, feeling like a weight was lifted off your shoulders. “But I am-… I’m so scared. How am I gonna have a baby? It sounds crazy.”

“Of course it does, it is.” He said “I’m terrified, too, but we’re together, right? Nothing bad can happen if we have each other.”

You nodded, feeling your chest unclench. “I guess you're right,” you whispered, your voice thick with emotion. “I just... needed to hear you say it.”

Yoongi smiled, leaning down to steal another kiss from you, this time deeper, longer. “I love you, baby, don’t you know that?”

You brushed your nose against his, nodding. “I love you, too, bubba.”

“C’mon, baby, stop crying.” He said, making you laugh.

#fic: so it goes #yoongi x reader #yoongi fanfiction #yoongi fanfic #bts x reader #bts smut #min yoongi fanfic #min yoongi x oc #yoongi fic recs #yoongi imagine #yoongi fluff #yoongi smut #yoongi fic #bts masterpost #bts fic rec #yoongi bts #bts one shot

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jinnie-ret · 1 year ago

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If ur taking rq still can I rq a skz x 15 year old girl in training (like that protection gic you wrote ) and how they react to her being good at producing, singing, rapping and dancing but they didnt know she could do all that until they keep running into her or maybe look for her because they ordered fkkd for her too eat with them and they see her in her rehearsals and in her dance practice room learning like idk an itzy choreo or sum by herself and they see shes improved since they last saw her do everything? Ig like a little Ace if u would like to put It that way!

It's ok if u don't want to or can't do this tho! Love ur writing💕

ace of hearts

stray kids x reader (platonic)

genre: fluff

content warnings: none

word count: 1.1k

summary: stray kids have nothing but good things to say about the upcoming ace of jyp.

I hope you enjoy! There's a small excerpt of a song Y/N has written herself which I actually wrote (it's a hobby of mine hehe) so if you want me to post the whole thing I'll do so, maybe as a poem haha

My asks are currently shut but if you want to be added to my taglist, do let me know! And if you liked it, please reblog and like! :)

MAIN MASTERLIST

Shoulder shimmying had never been so hard, but Y/N seemed to have finally gotten down the choreo to ITZY's 'Wannabe', the members of Stray Kids seeming to think so too. They had just been looking around for a room to practice in when they came across their young trainee friend, who they hadn't seen for a while due to their busy schedule.

A small applause sounded from behind Y/N, making her jump as she saw the door open and Stray Kids clapping for her.

"Ah! Hello sunbaenims!" Y/N blushed and bowed politely. She wasn't expecting to see them there, so absorbed into practising for her next showcase.

"Hi there!"

"Annyeong!"

"Wow!"

They all let out greetings as they walked over excitedly to Y/N.

"How has everything been? It's been a while since we saw you," Jeongin smiled widely at Y/N, trying to ease the obvious nerves he saw from her.

"Have you been practicing regularly? Your dancing has improved a lot," Changbin nodded his head in approval.

"Ah, you really think I've improved?! Yeah I've been practising a lot these days..." Y/N bashfully admitted, rubbing her sweaty palms on her leggings. Was it from exercising or from nerves? She wasn't quite so sure herself.

"We can see that. You're better at dancing and freestyling than us now," Lee Know laughed, praising the younger girl jokingly, but there was still a hint of seriousness to it that showed Y/N he was proud of her, and that helped her relax more.

"Maybe one day even Jisung will be jealous of your dancing skills," Felix laughed, causing the quokka like man to look over at him with a mock appalled face.

"Haha maybe I'll take his place as the ace," Y/N smirked, feeling comfortable enough to joke around with them. It wasn't a regular occurrence that she saw the boys but everytime she did, she was soon able to fall back into a relaxed state where it felt like she had known them forever.

"No way! You will never be as talented as me!" Jisung smirked back, yet he couldn't help but goofily smile back at her as he ruffled her hair.

"Well, we're glad you're practicing so hard. Would you like to have some fried chicken with us?" Seungmin piped up, his eagle eyes noticing that she only seemed to have some water in the room with her. Plus, he remembered what it was like being a trainee, and an offer of fried chicken would not be one to be turned down.

"Oh sure! If there's enough to go around!" Y/N clasped her hands together excitedly.

"Of course there's enough food! We're so proud of all your progress by the way, we can tell how hard you've been working, Y/Nnie," Chan praised her, as they all sat down together on the floor.

"Here, eat up," Hyunjin passed over a box of fried chicken to Y/N from the bags of fast food they had.

"Just remember to take a lot of rest too," Jisung commented genuinely, yet anyone could tell he, as well as the other members were very much so enthralled with the heaven sent food in front of them.

"Don't worry I do!" Y/N rushed out, before taking a bite of the fried chicken and wiggling slightly as she did a happy dance.

"You're so cute when you're excited!" Felix giggled as he saw her.

"That's exactly what Channie hyung does," Seungmin laughed along.

There was a moment of peaceful eating before Chan kept up the conversation.

"Oh yeah, we wanted to ask you something! Are you good at rapping?" Chan wondered, wiping his hands on a napkin.

"Well, I don't want to brag but I think I'm pretty good," Y/N shrugged, she had practiced enough and knew she was at JYP for a reason, and her talents certainly didn't go to waste when it came to rapping.

"Oh yeah? You actually rap too? I had no idea. Have you tried writing your own lyrics before?" Changbin got excited at the prospect of hearing Y/N rap.

"I'm not as confident in writing rap lyrics as I am in singing them if that makes sense?" Y/N explained, hoping it was understandable.

"I get what you mean. You must be very talented though since you can sing so well," Lee Know wondered.

"Do you happen to write your own songs too or do you learn songs from other artists?" Chan asked, interested in what her identity as a future artist would be.

"Oh I like to write my own songs too!" Y/N beamed. Now that, was an area she was proud of herself for.

"Really? Can you play one of your original songs for us?" Hyunjin said in a shocked tone, head tilting slightly in disbelief but wanting to hear her sing nonetheless.

The boys all stared at her in anticipation.

"Oh, sure... If you really want me to," Y/N became nervous again, because this was Stray Kids! Yes they felt like her friends but to sing her own personal works in front of them was still nerve wracking.

"Yes, we really want you to!" Jeongin encouraged her, offering that same reassuring smile as he did earlier.

All of the members were now eagerly waiting for her.

"Ok, here's a chorus I wrote recently," Y/N finally nodded, making the boys even more excited as she began to sing.

"Oh it's in my bones.

Hereditarily alone.

Surrounded by people,

But that gives no meaning.

It's in my bones."

The boys stared in in wonder, thinking the words were so beautiful and they loved the emotion she put into it even for such a small snippet of the song.

"Her voice is amazing..." Hyunjin was in awe.

"Yeah, you have a really good vocal tone!" Jisung clapped.

"And you wrote that yourself?" Chan smiled like a proud dad.

"Can we hear more?" Changbin said hopefully, nudging Y/N playfully.

"Well, I think I should now that I've sang a teaser for you," Y/N beamed, and for the next couple of minutes she sang the rest of the song to the boys. She even played a small backing track which consisted of an acoustic guitar, simple but sweet, building up towards the end of the song.

"I can't wait to see you debut!" Felix clapped with the other boys.

"You really will steal everyone's hearts, Y/N, you'll go far," Chan said, a big smile adorning his face as everyone offered their comments and praises to Y/N.

"Just don't let it get to your head," Lee Know joked, causing his members to whack him playfully and tell Y/N to not listen to him anymore.

"Thank you guys, it really means a lot."

tagged: @skz-streamer @kiraisastay @hannahhbahng @backintomykpopphaseagain @sakufilms @arloo00 @dunno-wut-to-do @splat00z @hanjiquokkaaa

#skz #skz x reader #stray kids x reader #stray kids #skz fluff #skz angst #straykids imagines #stray kids fluff #stray kids imagines #skz fic

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serverusslaype · 1 year ago

Text

Special

just a random short angsty, sort of fluffy one-shot, Severus Snape x professor!reader

i just wrote this right now because im in an angsty sort of mood, and i wanted to post something. i miss you guys, and i am now currently writing part 14 to shameless!! woo!! that break did my brain well. i feel refreshed hehe. <3 thank you for giving me some tips on how to get rid of that godforsaken writer's block, good lord. i hated it. but i'm free now, until next time ;)

this is a drabble/one-shot so it's sort of vague-ish, so yeah, if there's any mistakes or anything i'm sorry. ;(

(i also didn't put the taglist since it isn't part of the shameless fic! just in case you wondered!)

warnings: mentions of cheating

"If it makes you stop crying," Snape began hesitantly as he stared at your tear-stained face, frowning with a scrunched nose of what seemed like disgust. "We can go back to my office, and I'll make you some tea." He said, shoulders rising and falling slowly as he sighed. Watching you be so sad and cry wasn't something Snape was fond of, and it was effecting him - more than he wanted to admit. He just hoped you'd accept his request of making you some tea, then perhaps he could figure out what was making you so upset, and punish the culprits. Snape had always had a little soft-spot for you ever since you'd joined Hogwarts as a professor a year or so ago. Usually he didn't feel such a way towards younger, new professors, however, your kind and sweet aura had him unexpectedly mesmerised the moment you'd introduced yourself to him. The Potions Master wasn't exactly sure why he felt this way towards you so soon, but he knew it couldn't be good - the last time he felt something like this was back when he was a child.

You looked up, still sobbing quietly, managing to slip a confused frown upon your face. "Tea?" You repeated quietly with a sniffle, pausing for a moment to ponder on Snape's offer. "...Tea would be nice."

You hadn't expected to bump into your usually gloomy, rude colleague whilst having what you thought was going to be a private breakdown after learning that your partner had cheated on you with your best friend. Almost two years down the drain, just like that. Snape had accidentally walked in on you hunched over your desk, crying hopelessly. He was about to walk away when you'd heard a deep sigh, startling you. And here you were. Being offered tea by him.

"Let's go then." Snape said with a flat tone, looking away from your sad eyes, unable to withstand the pain that was gathering in his chest.

You were at least two or three cups of tea down when you'd finally explained everything to Snape. From the start of your relationship to the unexpected demise. It dug up old, painful memories, and you were crying again.

"What's wrong with me?" You sobbed, taking another sip of the tea that Snape had made you; hot tears soaking your cheeks and dripping into the cup. Another deep, frustrated sigh slipped from Snape again as he watched you from his desk with a sad frown upon his pale features. "I don't get it," you sniffled, gripping the handle of the tea cup with white knuckles, "did I do something wrong?"

No, you couldn't do anything wrong, Snape wanted to say. He wanted to tell you how wrong you were, and how perfectly good you truly were. But he knew you wouldn't listen, and so he kept quiet, only muttering in disagreement.

"I doubt that, Y/N." Snape mumbled, though you didn't give him much time to say anything else before you stumbled into a self-deprecating rant.

"Maybe I wasn't worth it, I mean, it's not like I'm anything... special," you laughed dryly, avoiding Snape's cold eyes, "maybe I'm just the girl that everyone dates before they find their true love. I'm the girl that they use to find the one, I don't have any good qualities, I'm a pushover, and-"

Snape inhaled sharply, "Stop it, Y/N!" He bellowed, slamming a hand down on the desk that the two of you were sat at. Instantly, you went silent, your mouth hanging open in shock as your heartbeat suddenly sped into an incredibly fast pace. You glanced up at Snape with wet and wide eyes, startled by his unusual outburst.

"Severus-"

"No, Y/N," he held up a hand, silencing you, "you're wrong about yourself. You are special." Snape sighed, moving his hand to massage his temples. You couldn't believe what was coming out of this man's mouth. "You're more than enough. Your ex was clearly a fool to do such a thing to you. In fact, I can't fathom why they would choose your friend over you." Snape said with a stern tone, clearly distressed. Your mouth still hung open as you stared at him, flabbergasted. "You're kind, sweet, considerate, and your heart is twice the size than it should be."

"I..." You uttered quietly, staring at Snape, evidently speechless. He shut his eyes momentarily, suddenly realising what he'd just said. Yet another deep sigh slipped from his heaving chest, rendering you silent.

"You..." Snape stumbled, avoiding your eyes. There was no way he could look at you right now. He'd just opened the floodgates on what he truly thought of you. He probably looks like a right blithering idiot.

The room went quiet, and the two of you sat there in what felt like a somewhat-comfortable silence, taking the moment to acknowledge what had just happened.

You stared at the man opposite you, a sudden and unusual warmth blooming in your chest. For the first time since you'd met him, you took the opportunity to truly look at him. Snape's black eyes glittered in the low, soft amber light from his candles as he reluctantly glanced up at you, pressing his lips into an awkward thin and flat line. His shoulders rose a tad, tensing as he inhaled, and he shifted his gaze to the desk again. Clearly, he was unsure on how to navigate this current moment.

A tiny smile picked at the corners of your lips as you looked at him. "Thank you." You whispered, glancing down at his splayed out hands. Taking a chance, you reached out your own hand and placed it atop of one of his, feeling it flinch. Snape's eyes darted up to yours, and he returned your smile, though it seemed a little awkward.

Snape didn't say anything to you, he only nodded gently before pulling his hand back to himself after a few long moments, clearing his throat.

"Well, since you've stopped crying," he began, sitting up straight in his chair, "we can assume I've done a good job." A little chuckle escaped you, and it caused a loose, genuine smile to erupt on Snape's face. You noticed it, but chose not to say anything, instead silently admiring how well it suited him.

"Now I know who to come to when I'm sad." You joked lightly, and as quickly as the smile had arrived on his lips, it disappeared. You laughed, feeling a tad lighter. Though the awful situation still sat within you like a dead weight, waiting to be dealt with, it felt good to smile and laugh, especially with a man you thought to be devoid of such emotions.

"I don't think-"

"Thanks, Severus." You cut him off with a bright smile, making his heart flutter. Perhaps he would wander past your classroom a little more often than before.

Masterpost

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bitchimasnake-sss · 4 months ago

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hiii this is the anon that requested part two and i return begging for part three of tennis! zoro.

ahem.

PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE

thanks for coming to my tedtalk! :)

in all seriousness though i would love to see a part 3 and definitely think you should have an ao3 to post longer content!! please keep up your lovely writing 💋💋 (MAKE ZORO REALLY WORK FOR IT HEHEHEHE [i was sobbing over how cute his little offerings were AND FALLING ASLEEP AT THE DOOR i cant])

UR THE ONLY ONE KEEPING ME GOING GIRLY 🎀😞. SO GLADDD YOU LIKED THAT ONE, HERE HAVE THIS ONE NOWWW. ILL MAKE ZORO EXTRAA PATHETIC FOR YOU MWUAH😚

bitchimasnake-sss presents: the one piece AUs

03. AITA for going back to my ex? ft. roronoa zoro!

set-up: part 03 [FINAL PART] to my badminton player!zoro au lol. you can find the first two parts here! (i recommend you read those first!) getting your heart broken when you were seventeen was inevitable, getting it broken on camera seven years later was also inevitable, it seems. but letting your ex back into your life with the glittering promises of "i'll win you back in a month?" was getting your heart broken again and again and again also inevitable? most importantly: was roronoa zoro worth your sanity? warnings: dumb people, even dumber plot by me! includes angst towards the end, zoro is an idiot trying his best to win you over! cameos by nami, sanji, perona and mihawk because i love writing them tysm. and obviously smut (hehe u nasty). nsfw thoughts include: feral!zoro. this man is nasty, he likes blood, sweat and tears. a lot of overstimulation, a little bit of bimbofication, hints of dub!con, car-sex, penetration, teasing, dirty talk, a little bit of feral!zor. OKAY THAT'S IT!! MINORS DNI OR I WILL HUNT YOU! wc: 10.6k m.list

17th of october 11:43 p.m.

"really?" and you could hear sanji drop his precious cigarette onto the ground in pure, unaltered shock, "are you toying with me right now, love?"

"no." you replied firmly, nimble fingers getting caught against familiar, green locks as roronoa zoro pressed honeyed lips to your stomach. he trailed downwards, uncaring as your manager spluttered on the speaker.

"you are actually dating that green-haired freak?" from his tone alone, you could imagine sanji to look wide-eyed and tongue-tied. meeting the eyes of the said “green haired freak”, you found a sour expression plastered to his handsome features.

"no... well, not yet.” you swiped your fingers against his scalp, manicured fingers softly scratching the frown on his face away, “we're on a one-month trial phase."

"are you and him a netflix subscription, mon amore? what do you mean one month?" the blonde hissed. but you were far too gone, too warped within the feeling of the athlete’s soft kisses on your hiked-up thighs to even offer a hairsbreadth of attention to your critic.

"well–" as the sportsman hands trailed over your thighs all-too-intimately, you found yourself sighing blissfully, "he said he wants a month to win me back.”

“that is insane.”

“maybe. but his time starts today, so, we have until 17th of november to come to some sort of conclusion." zoro didn’t dare still against your soft skin. kneading the fat of your hips, pressing hot kisses to thighs and nipping at fading bruises to renew them. but you tightened your grip on his locks, tipping his head backwards as you pulled on them. glaring at him, you breathed out a warning, “either he cleans his act up, or i leave him in the dust."

but who was roronoa zoro if not the man made to get on your nerves?

his mouth fell agape as his eyes met yours, and a soft moan tumbling past him at the sharp sting of your pull. that wayward moan soon turned into a grunt as the sportsman toyed with the band of your shorts.

“stop that.” you whispered, eyes growing wide as the blonde on the other end of the speaker continued his distressed rants.

"and what do i do about it?!" for the first time in the five years vinsmoke sanji had been your manager, you heard his voice shake in panic, "you two just broke up! in front of the cameras! like a week ago!"

"it's fine, sanji. people get together all the time—"

"—not if they're olympic level athletes!"

"hey, you have no idea how much shit goes down in the olympic village." you shrugged, "last time 160k condoms were given out, and people flew threw them like it was nothing. there’s lots of crying. and fucking too, actually. sometimes both, now that i think about it."

“rabid monsters.”

“don’t be jealous. athletes just have a lot of stamina.” while you were busy rolling your eyes at the blonde and his dramatic antics, zoro climbed back up over you. a smirk on his lips, flashing you his canines, and mouthing “really? stamina?”

clad in a fitted, black tank top, your eyes drifted down to his arms and chest. shamelessly staring at the muscles flexing and unflexing under the flimsy material, you brought your free hand to run wild against his bicep. finding his index under your jaw, he tilted your face up to meet his eyes again. you smiled up at him without much thought and his heart stuttered out in the rhythm of his shallow breaths. fuck you for being so pretty.

before you could nod and ask what he wanted, he pressed a chaste kiss against your lips. next, he sunk his face in the crook of your neck. you felt the nip of his sharp canines against your sensitive pulse. but that sly bastard. all of that was to distract you from the way he dipped his hand under your shorts and pulled your panties aside.

“zo–“ you started slowly, but it was all in vain. the man above you was on a mission. and that mission was apparently to get your own manager to report you as a sex offender or something?! atleast that’s what it felt like from the way he rubbed his thumb against your sensitive clit.

“either ways.” your manager huffed, ignoring the way your breath hitched at the new bruises against your neck and the stuttering swipes of his thumb against your folds, “this is still insane.”

"weren’t–” you gulped, trying to keep your voice steady, “you were the one saying that my job is to playand yours’ to take care of such things, so, do that.”

“and i can! i can fix it.” you heard a thud ring through the speaker and imagined that the blonde had fallen back onto his back helplessly, “but i need time to fix this. gotta talk to nami-san, and then i will need to fix the narrative using the media. i need time.”

barely raising his lips off of your narcotic skin – with a flushed face and husky voice �� zoro replied coolly, “don’t worry, nami’s on our side with this one.”

“HUH?! WHO WAS THAT?”

pinching the taut skin of the athlete’s bicep as a warning to stay shut, your tone stayed sickly sweet, “who? ‘twas the wind, sanji.”

“don’t try to sway me with your use of ‘twas.” he hissed like a wet cat, “is that mosshead here right now? is he in your room right now?!”

“and if you’re worried about the paps, roronoa will buy them out, you know?” as if to protest against your suggestion, zoro flicked his thumb faster against your swollen nub. you glared at him. “a-and if you’re worried someone will see us, they won’t. we won’t go public with it.”

“none of those suave answers.” sanji firmly stated, “answer what I asked first. is he there right now?”

you whistled a soft, “dunno what you’re talking about…” before drawing your phone away from your face, “because that’s blasphemous!!” purposefully covering the speaker with your palm, “hey, hey? sanji- hello? can’t hear… hear you right now. hello?”

you heard a muffled, “DON’T YOU DARE PULL THAT ON ME OR SO GOD HELP ME–“

“still can’t hear you.” your thumb hovered over the red button, “g’night, sanji!”

beep.

“i’m paying for the paps?”

trying to push his weight off of your relatively smaller frame, you huffed out, “c-can’t you stay shut when i ask you to, roronoa?”

in retaliation, he pressed more of his body weight onto you. snuggling his face into your crook and inhaling your scent like a man crazed, his fingers kept toying against you like it was as easy as breathing.

you tried to push him off again, gritting out, “do you think a good dick is enough of a reason to come back? cause it is not.”

“it is one of the reasons, is it not?”

“no. is it not.” you repeated, “shut it, and find a new strategy or something.”

“fine, tsk.” and with that the sportsman got off of you. pulling his hand out of your flimsy shorts, leaving behind your aching body as he got up. standing at the door, he looked back just to delve his long fingers past his lips to suck down on your essence. smiling as he pulled out, he made his conclusion in one, swift word, “sweet.”

and you just threw a pillow at him, face flaming up at the way he just simply caught the pillow and threw it right back at you, “fuck off, roronoa.”

“hm?” he cocked his eyebrow, careful hands still not attempting to open the door and leave, “I’ll just head back to my room, then.”

you found yourself crossing your arms over your chest, half to give him attitude and other half to soothe the skin that had been alit with his body over yours, “go, then. you’re the one who wandered in my room with unholy intentions.”

somebody could mistake his as the reincarnation of the devil with the way he was grinning. all unholy thoughts and malicious actions, “you’re the one still laying, waiting for me to do something.”

at his (correct) accusations, you sat up haughtily. adjusting the tank top and pulling it upwards, you found yourself glaring at the towering man for the nth time, “you’re insufferable. is this how you’re gonna win me back?”

“hey,” he shrugged, broad shoulders moving up and down with delicate ease, “worked the first time, didn’t it?”

“i was seventeen.” your eyes narrowed, “and you used to be way more handsome back then. it won’t work this time around.”

he hummed again, and within his cocky tone you could anticipate he had something to nag you with, “so i was handsome to you? that’s adorable.”

“fucking insufferable.”

“but handsome nonetheless?” and you almost threw your phone at his pretty face when he just grinned and exited the room. actually, no. you almost threw your phone when you realized that you were blushing, and fighting off a smile as he left your room.

what was this man doing to you?! ──★ ˙🧷 ̟ !!

19th of october, 7:58 p.m.

🍓attempt 01: no limits.

“okay, and i have no limits?” you asked again, just to ensure that you heard him right.

“yes, you do not.”

“and you’re not gonna sue me for using your money?”

“no, i will not. i don’t think i can legally.” he sighed, “do you wanna do it or not?”

“i do, but…” zoro's heavy voice kissed your ears, cutting you off, "then, stop whining. no buts, no ifs.”

“is this really how you’re gonna win me over?” mumbling, your lips fell into an easy pout, “feels more like bribery.”

“nami said the quickest way to a woman's heart is shopping. or just cold, hard cash, really. but i figured this was more romantic." tilting his face downwards, his voice dropped down to a whisper, “does it feel romantic yet?”

goddamn that freak!

your skin erupted into a violent goosebump as you felt his words against your soft skin. your face heated up as your fingers stilled against the keypad of your laptop, the home page of your favorite shopping site pulled up and resting neatly. ready to do some damage on his wallet. well, honestly, what damage? he was a well-paid nepo baby who had a personal gym and court in his house. this would probably barely feel like a pinch to him.

“again, i ask for your consent.” you asked anyways, trying to remind yourself to be a business-savvy woman who had only come to absolutely wreck his wallet. zoro declared monotonously, “i give it with full consciousness. jesus, woman.”

“okay then, no taksies backsies.” you cleared your throat in anticipation. stretching your fingers slowly as they hovered over the keyboard. his arms wrapped around your middle and you fell against his chest with a soft thud, “start already.”

“what’s even the reason for this?”

“your manager said we can’t go out, like in public. and blondie hates me enough as it is right now. so, i didn’t wanna risk taking you shopping outside.” roronoa zoro found himself revelling in your dishevelled demeanour. voice honeyed, he rasped out, “what’s wrong with my room, though? nice ‘n comfy, isn’t it?”

“I meant what is the reason for me to sit on your fucking lap?”

“oh that?” he was laying in his bed, with you atop him and your laptop atop you. you grumbled on, “and is it necessary to do this in your room? the living room is a perfectly perfect place to shop online.”

“you want me to get handsy in front of my father? that’s too much. the old man would probably die if he saw me like that.” he hummed, “not sure he’s ever even done anything. you know, given both me and ‘rona are adopted.”

you glared back at him at the shit he spewed but then your eyes widened as realization sunk in, “holy shit is he a forty year old... virgin?”

“dunno.”

“but he’s like emo, and vampirish. there’s no way he didn’t get some during the twilight era.”

“he was also the world champion at that time,” zoro reminisced, “he must have gotten girls.”

a laugh escaped you by, “zoro.” you stressed, “you’re the world champion right now. and the tally of girls you get is at a great zero.”

zoro mulled over your words before slowly shifting his pelvis so that you fell back at him unexpectedly, “not zero. got a girl on my lap right now.”

his laugh echoed yours as he held you tighter, and you tried to wriggle free, “jus’ cause you’re paying. no other reason.”

“how does it feel to lie to yourself?” he asked with mock grievance in his tone, and you tried to elbow his side to break free, “die.”

“kill me yourself, coward.”

“i will.” you admitted, still laughing as he decided to somehow tighten his grip even more firmly, “don’t. you’d look horrible in orange.”

“how dare you, roronoa zoro.” your palm struck his forearm playfully, “do not talk about my fashion choices when you shower once a week.��

“nobody had a problem with it thus far,” he answered back easily, “but if you have a problem, i suppose i could shower semi-regularly.”

“semi-regularly?” you almost coughed up a hairball, “jesus christ, i don’t think i would able to fuck you ever again.”

“liar.”

──★ ˙🧷 ̟ !!

22nd of October, 7:43 a.m.

🍓attempt 02: the way to the heart is through the stomach (i think??)

“roronoa.”

“father.”

“what are you doing in my kitchen right now?” the man raised a careful eyebrow, staring at his dishevelled son who he had caught not a minute earlier bickering with a red-head on his phone.

“cooking,” zoro deadpanned, “i'm trying to make waffles.”

his fathers hawk-like gaze swept over the kitchen. flour sprinkled over counter-tops, some on his cheek, a batter that looked more radioactive that the what remained of Chernobyl. the older man drawled on, “and i presume you know how to cook?”

“no. she's helping.” he flashed his father his phone-screen and the familiar, scorned woman who was on video-call. when she caught sight of mihawk, she smiled, “sir mihawk, how are you?”

“just passing by. come by for dinner someday, nami.” the man deadpanned and the manager laughed, “of course. how can I refuse?”

now his hawk-like stare was trained on zoro, who stared back at his father as if they were sworn enemies on court, “what is it, now?”

“is it for her?”

“who else?”

“don’t burn my house down.”

“understood.”

and with that brief conversation, mihawk disappeared back into the mazes of his house, and zoro went back to bickering with the red-head.

“you add milk.” she emphasized, clicking her manicured nails together as she tried to guide an idiot to build the equivalent of rome, “do you not know what milk is?”

“i have enough calcium in my bones and I will not fall for scams like milk or medical insurance.”

“what?” she spluttered, “y-you don’t have insurance?!”

“when am I ever gonna need it, woman?”

“oh my god. you don’t have insurance!” and the last thing zoro saw the manager do was flip him off as she ran to some place elsewhere. possibly to get him some sort of medical insurance that he totally didn’t need. beep.

zoro’s fingers hovered over his contact list, the next stop being perona neesan 💗👻 .

“'rona.” zoro grumbled as he caught the face of perona on the other side. huge sunglasses were perched on her nose, a silky bandana flowing from her coloured hair, “awh, you remember me, zoro. finally.”

“quit that,” he mumbled helplessly before turning the back camera, “i need your help.”

“you’re committing arson at dad’s place?” she raised her sunnies so as to see the kitchen better. flour everywhere, and whatever the fuck was in that batter. kissing her teeth, she admitted, “i mean i don’t endorse violence… but that kitchen could use a makeover.”

“no. jesus, perona.” he turned to camera around to his face, “i– uh, i need to make waffles. an’ i don’t know shit. can you help or what?”

“huh?” her bug-like eyes widened impossibly wider, “yeah, obviously i can. but why are you cooking? is dad dying? and is his last wish to eat burnt waffles?”

“haha, funny.”

“wasn’t being funny. you have like... two left hands.”

“just to remind you, i’m ambidextrous.” zoro replied, poker-faced, and perona pouted, “who are you making them for, then?”

“myself.”

“liar.” narrowing her eyes, she probed further, “is it your ex? oh my god. are you guys actually together?”

“what?” zoro narrowed his eyes in return, “fuck off, ‘m not asking you for help.” he sighed, “where did you even hear about that?”

“it’s her?!” the goth girl squealed, “and you didn’t tell me?! I thought it was regular PR stuff that nami dragged you into. but she’s back? i remember how you sobbed when–”

“bye, 'rona. don’t call me back.” beep.

roronoa zoro had barely breathed when his elder sister called back. he picked it up with a groan, “what? I’m not answering your stupid questions.”

“okay fine.” she huffed, “’m not gonna ask you about your pathetic, little crush right now. keyword: right now.”

“perona.” he tried to threaten but the woman just leaned forward till her face was all zoro could see, “show me some respect, i’m older than you.”

“sorry.” the green-haired mumbled and his sister nodded in self-satisfaction, “and as far as waffles as concerned, don’t cook. you’d burn the house down. just order them in and say you made them.”

“isn’t that like, practically lying?”

“it is, yes.”

“and aren’t you gonna tell me how it’s morally wrong to do that?”

“it’s a fucking waffle, zoro. not the olympics.” she finally pulled the sunnies back to her face and carefully perched them on her nose again, “nobody cares about cheating. just win her over, and thank me later.”

“you’re a bad influence, you know that?” a small smile cracked across his face, “oh, by the way–” the sportsman quirked an eyebrow, “do you have health insurance?”

“i mean, who doesn’t?”

“me.”

“what?”

“nothing. thanks, i appreciate it.” the goth girl eyes widened all over again and zoro cut the call before her concerns could reach him.

8:55 a.m.

“you know what’s insane?” you mumbled through a mouthful, “i can swear that joanna’s bakery down the street makes these exact waffles.”

“do they?” zoro leaned forward, pouring more syrup to distract you, “that’s wild.”

“it is.” you nodded before taking another mouthful, “you know what else is insane?”

“how much of a good cook i am?” he tried, before having a bite himself.

“no.” you smiled at the way he gulped down the sweet breakfast up, “the fact that i swear i saw a brown bag with their logo in the trash, and now these waffles taste exactly like theirs.”

zoro froze, eyes trained on the mess of fried batter and syrup. he slowly looked up, “that’s insane, indeed.” he averted his gaze as you deadpanned, “you’re a terrible liar.”

“isn’t that an ideal quality though?” he tried again, “like, i could never lie to you.”

“mhm,” you nodded as a smile pressed to your lips, “try harder next time.”

──★ ˙🧷 ̟ !!

25th of october, 10:03 p.m.

🍓attempt 03: with love, from an idiot.

“if this backfires, then what?” the man asked, and you could only make out faint noises from his phone. a faint, “if it backfires, then, you don’t get the girl, genius.” but nothing beyond that could deciphered as you stood with your ear to the door of your room.

“are you done?” you knocked at your door when the bickering on the other end ceased momentarily. the wood echoed under your faint hits as you called out again, “can I come in or what?”

there was no answer and you busied yourself with tracing the pattern of wood on the door once over. your forehead touched the cold wood, frustrated at yourself for allowing that beast to take over your territory.

zoro had waltzed into your room and declared that he was going to kick you out of your own room.

“huh?” you had mumbled, too confused at the way he tugged your arm and tried to push you outwards, “no way I’m leaving. fuck no.”

“I need like half an hour. I promise–”

“–if you intend to paint my room green, zoro.” you had barely started when he asked you to leave again. so, obviously, you both bickered for a good five minutes, got yelled at by mihawk cause you two were interrupting his wine drinking hour, and proceeded to bicker in whispers before you had to finally cave in and go out.

now, you were sitting in front of the closed door, and tracing patterns in the hope that sooner or later, your territory will be given back to you.

“yeah, come on in.” you heard the man finally yell back from the other side, and you sprung up to your feet in part-excitement, part-fear. your fingers tried to turn the sleek metal handle to swing it open. except it wouldn’t open. moving it front and back, your eyebrows bunched when the door refused to budge open.

“what the fuck?” and to your surprise the green-head on the other side yelled back, “jesus, stop trying to break open the door.”

“it won’t open!”

“because I’m trying to open it for you.” he hissed back, “and you’re pulling from the other side. stop it.”

“you stop it.”

“if you could just let me do that for you. fuck–” the door swung inwards with such abrupt, wicked force that you almost kissed the ground face-first. glaring up at the man, you seethed, “what was that for?”

“i was trying to be a gentleman.”

you straightened up, squaring your shoulders defensively, “don’t. you’re barely a fully-functioning man.”

while you were waiting for him to counter you with his regular flirting disguised as hostility, instead his face softened and he apologized, “sorry. come on in?”

“huh?” your shoulders went slack, eyes narrowing at his broad figure as you walked past him and into the room.

the lights were dim.

“what’s this?” your eyes scanned the place, he had made a pillow fort on the ground with whatever haphazard sheets and pillows you had been hoarding in the room. the tv in your room showed a still from netflix: Ten Things I Hate About You.

you bent down, thumb and forefinger raising the sheets upwards to properly see inside, you saw packs of chips and instant ramen, coke and chocolates stashed to the side.

still frozen, you found him meekly call out your name, “do you hate it? do you? you do, right?” you heard the door lock behind you, “i can undo it, it’ll take me like ten minutes tops. it is literally not a big deal, i’ll take it down.” his voice dropped down to a whisper, “jesus fuck, I told nami this was stupid.”

he knelt next to you, forearms stretched forward as if he was itching to pull the flimsy housing to shreds. your hand grabbed his, face turning to meet his shy one.

“you did this for me?”

“uh,” he hesitated, “remember, blondie said no going out. so, I thought i’d try… this?” his voice grew weak, “you hate it.”

“you did it for me?” you repeated, almost in disbelief.

he sighed methodically, “who else?”

a grin broke on your face, “i didn’t take you for a romantic, roronoa.”

he shrugged off the goosebumps that threatened to break on his body at your reaction, “pfft. whatever. it’s not a… it’s not a big deal. nami helped… so, yeah.”

“you even put on my one of my favourite movies.”

“yeah, yeah.” the sportsman stood up, walking away from you to duck inside the fort and arrange the food items. but you could see his ear-tips growing redder, coy eyes carefully avoiding yours, “you’re, uh, you’re welcome.”

“but if you’re trying to impress me.” you followed suit, “this is not gonna work.”

he turned back to stare at you. a deer in headlights. “’s not?”

“well, I know you’re not a romantic. nami surely is though, it seems.” you settled down on the comfy mattress, turning your body so that it faced the wall the tv was plastered on, “i know this won’t happen again once we’re actually dating.”

“hey, it’s not like I’m not romantic at all. see, i’ve been doing well these couple of months. i think?” he tried to defend but you cut him, “you’re off season right now. once you have your five a.m. trainings and regular matches, you’d forget I even exist. you forget to eat, to fucking breathe when it comes to your game. a whole ass human?” you found yourself scoffing, “you would give up in a day. and that’s me just speculating based on observing you from afar per these past few months.”

he fell silent, probably reeling from your accurate observation. you sighed, trying to ease the unnecessary tension you had created, “i’m not attacking you, zoro.”

features downcast, lips pulled into an emotionless straight line. he repeated, “you’re speculating based on observing me from afar per these past few months?”

you probably should have drawn the line here, probably should have said okay and turned on the movie. but you were so well-versed in the language of self-destruction that someone should arrange a fucking pulitzer for you.

“you’re a sportsman first, son next.” you prayed your voice held atleast an inch of sympathy as you did a neat, little character assassination of the poor man. “as much as I appreciate the gesture, I am not sure where lover falls on that priority list. you like the chase, the idea… that i am something grand.” you stilled, “but i’m not. i am not an olympic medal, or a grand slam title. i'm just some woman.”

“you’re not just some woman.” he breathed slowly. “i suppose you have a point. i am not a lover. my hands find the racket before they find a bouquet, my words find silence before they do declarations of love. i- i don’t how to… just love.” he repeated to plead his case.

and this was it.

you barely held your breath as the man next to confirmed just who he was. he was not a lover. he was the number one on the global charts. and how selfish had you been to demand that he be anything but that demon on court?

“but,” zoro proved you wrong. “i wouldn’t have sacrificed long days and sleepless nights for just some woman. you underestimate how much you mean to me.” his breath grew strained, words unsure as if it was the first time he was telling the truth, “five years is a long, long time to come back home and yearn for your arms.”

you didn’t turn your head to gawk at him even though every cell in you wanted to. every inch of you wanted to turn your head, grab his face in your smaller palms and ask him to confess just how much you meant to him. but you were not sure you could listen to him come up empty handed like a fish out of water. you were not sure you wanted to find out just how easily roronoa zoro could break your heart.

but as the two of you fell into silence, your eyes zeroed in on the zooming in and out title card on tv instead, “let’s jus’ watch.”

“you mean everything to me. always have, always will.” you felt his palm on yours, and you flinched at his careful touches. pulling your hand back to your chest, you felt the familiar speeding up of your heart against your ribcage, “don’t. zoro, please.”

“don’t what?” he tried to ask, tried to turn toward you with anticipation making a home in his irises and vile thoughts on his lips.

don’t what? you tried to find the answer to the very same question. don’t what? what did you want to say to him? was it “please don’t make me think you could love me all over again.” or “please don’t break my heart again.” or just a simple “don’t say another word or i’d find myself risking it all for you. and i cannot stand to be the fool who fell for you yet again.”

just a series of unfortunate ‘agains’, it seemed.

instead, you turned your body towards his, tentative hands coming up to hold his face in yours before falling back to the mattress. you raked in a forbidden sigh, the sound so loud in the eerily quite room. finally looking at him, you found yourself growing dumber.

somehow, like this – vulnerable – he looked like just another twenty-two year old. not a world champion. not somebody capable of destroying you.

“i am not sure i’m ready to get my heart broken by you again.” you confessed slowly, like a coward. “i am not sure i can celebrate my next birthday, just to beg some meaningless god above for you once more.”

“then don’t.” his eyes drifted downwards, heartsick fingers twitching as they inched closer to your warmth. his words were low, like yet another coward. “don’t ask for me back if i break your heart again.”

was it that simple?

──★ ˙🧷 ̟ !!

26th of october, 8:09 a.m.

you woke up with open packets and stacked cups of ramen on the floor, some episode of friends blaring on the tv and zoro stirring you awake.

sunlight filtered through the window, streaming in and pouring through the linen onto the man in front you. he was pretty, achingly so. his hair was tousled, lips parted, and thick brows bunched together like he was playing a match right now, “wake up.”

“huh?” rubbing your eyes, you tried to blink sleep away but instead grew more confused the longer you ruminated about his words, “what?”

“up and runnin’.” he repeated, “i need you.”

“need me?” your face contorted to show pure, unadulterated confusion, “zoro, ‘slike eight a.m.? can’t you wait a while?”

something nostalgic stirred within you as he smiled and bent down to face you easily. did the sun always get caught against his frame like he was a deity with a chokehold on you?

his smile was easy-going, and suddenly, you were fourteen year olds planning to ‘run away’ from home because you wanted to see the world. his voice shook you out of the daze, “get your head out of the gutter. didn’t mean it that way.”

“huh?” you couldn’t even find yourself growing offended amid your sleep-infused, hazed state. “what do you mean then?”

he tugged on your arms to help you sit up, “we’re going on a road trip.”

“we… are?” your expression grew awry, “where?”

“pack up and meet me outside,” he stood up, “you’d find out once we get there.”

“but zoro, hey–” you tried calling out. but it was futile as he walked out of the room, and you stay seated in the mess of sheets and pillow and tried to make sense of what was and what is.

5:42 p.m. 🍓attempt 04: next destination: love!

zoro stared at his phone for what seemed like an eternity. your gaze shifted from him to the deserted road and back to him. the dull sun inching near the horizon skeptically as if watching you two making a fool of yourselves. the winds were warm, and your road-trip was in the hands of an absolute idiot.

you slumped back into the leather, muttering, “should’ve never let you navigate.”

“let me concentrate, woman.” he huffed as his forefinger and thumb zoomed in on the unknown streets on his maps.

“how do you ever go anywhere?! your navigation powers are in the negatives.” tone haughty, you turned around to stare at him, “what kind of grown ass man gets confused on google maps? it literally said go straight!”

“i did go straight.” he turned to stare at you, tone just as haughty. “and i have a driver usually, i don’t drive by myself.”

“you went straight?” you repeated, somewhat amused by his ability to get lost on a straight highway. you craned your head, eyes peering past the black, tinted windows to stare at the deserted road, “and we ended up here? near a ghost town?”

“hold on.” he shifted his attention to the useless app pulled up on his phone screen. his face bunched up in irritation, throwing his phone on the dash-board before shifting the gear to start moving, “no point staying in one place, let’s keep movin’ and we will eventually figure it out.”

“figure what out?” you groaned, slumping back all over again, “atleast tell me where we’re going.”

“surpr–” you cut him off, “there would be no surprise if we never reach it!”

“okay, fair.” he breathed in slowly as the SUV made its way down the deserted road, passing by curated farms only inhabited by scarecrows. he sighed, “if we don’t figure out the road by nightfall, i’ll tell you.”

10:53 p.m.

“so,” zoro avoided your heated gaze, finally admitting the truth, “guess we’re lost."

“yes. yes we are, roronoa.”

“and it’s nightfall, so, i should tell you the destination.”

“yes. yes you should, roronoa.”

“don’t use that tone with me.” he tried meekly and your eyes narrowed in response, “why? are you scared?”

“no.” he cleared his throat, trying to sound like his usual self as he looked around in the lonely diner. the wooden table was rickety, the theme of the diner felt vintage-y, but in a way that was more unused than vintage. a lone, old woman waited behind the counter as you both munched on your dinner. once done with his inspection, he continued, “but it’s unnerving. you sound like nami, and she’s a witch as far as i know. red-head, you know.”

“you have moss-green hair, roronoa.”

“witches support witches.” he emphasized, and in return, a witch-like laugh past your lips, “you should be unnerved. good, because i feel like i have no choice but to sacrifice you in a satanic ritual to go back home now.”

the old woman behind the counter looked at you with utter dread in her eyes but you were too busy stabbing your fork in your grilled cheese, “now, spill. where were we going?”

he sighed, “home.”

“home?” you repeated, “home?”

“i thought i’d take you back to our childhood home,” his voice trailed off.

“why?”

why that wretched place? the place that become bleak, repetitive once you were left all alone five years ago, once he left in the blink of an eye. you routine had become monotonous after him: badminton court, school, home, practice, home, practice, home, sleep. rinse and repeat. repeat. repeat. repeat.

pursing his lips together, he looked down at his plate, “for old time’s sake, i guess?”

“old time’s sake?”

“there was a time when neither of us hated that little, suburban town.” he grinned, “remember that park with the broken swings?”

“that shit was haunted.” you took a bite, conspiring through a mouthful, “i mean why else was it never fixed?”

he continued, “and that public swimming pool? how was every guard there a creep?”

“except dave.” you nodded in agreement, a slight smile playing on your lips, “dave was cool.”

"he liked you so much, it was stupid." zoro huffed before popping a french fry in his mouth.

“you're the one to talk. do you remember courtney?” you grinned, shoving an index in his direction, “she had suchhh a huge crush on you in middle-school. it was honestly confusing.”

“why was it confusing?”

“you looked like a kiwi,” and you laughed when his eyebrows bunched together and he almost pouted, “i believe it was you that liked this kiwi.”

“tch, that was lifetimes ago.” your voice softened as he stayed quiet, the two of you just looking at each other as if registering each other’s silence as the only, absolute truth. the knife lodged in your grilled cheese slipped past your grip and a soft clang rang out as it hit your porcelain plate. you hummed, “should’ve told me we’re going back. i would have helped you navigate, zoro.”

“’sfine.” he shook his head, right hand coming up to scratch the itch away and re-set the strands of hair, “we can just head back. if we leave now, we’d reach by dawn. it’s pointless to go back to that old town now.”

you sighed, fingers interlocking as you slumped back against the worn out seat. the booth was cold against your back, the light bulb flickering momentarily as the two of you existed in a place far removed from reality, a place where the two of you were just twenty-somethings eating dinner at a worn-out diner.

“are you done eating?” you asked once he pushed his plate away. he nodded and you found yourself tugging his arm to leave the diner.

“what’s wrong?” he asked, confused, as he trailed after you. you glanced back once, “if we keep moving forward, we’d probably figure it out, right?” you stilled, turning fully to face him, “let’s go home, yeah?”

if roronoa zoro could, he would follow you to the miserable depths of hell. what was a small town compared to that?

he nodded, “yeah.”

──★ ˙🧷 ̟ !!

27th of october, 6:29 p.m.

“this is it, huh?” you stared at the massive suburban home in front of you. the lawn was trimmed, kept nice and clean as you two stood in front of what was once your humble abode.

your family had sold the place once you expressed that you wanted to move away to do better in your profession, and you had never had the heart to come back and check who bought the place or who didn’t.

“wanna walk around town?” zoro offered his palm, albeit a bit hesitantly, “let’s see what has changed.”

well, that small creak behind your middle school had dried up, now littered with popped soda cans and torn packs of chip. cigarette butts stuck between jagged rocks and dried leaves. the ‘haunted’ park was still not fixed, but you saw little children running around, the scarfs against their tiny frames flying behind them momentarily as they chased each other around. and the leaves on the ground stirred like they were alive under their light footsteps. the old public badminton court had been renovated, it seemed, and the streetlights had been upgraded to a softer orange-y shade rather than the harsh white you both grew up under.

“they made another mall where the theatre was.” zoro commented as you both walked by what used to be your old cinema hall.

“you remember the theatre?” you asked as your eyes raked over the looming white structure with faces of celebrities plastered onto hoardings with the bold declarations of ‘now playing’.

“of course,” he shrugged, muscled arms methodically going up and down, “we had our first date there.”

“it wasn’t a date. you told me you wanted to catch the movies and then you tried to hold my hand for the next two hours.” you emphasized, kicking the dried twigs on the sidewalk. zoro joined in, lazily kicking fallen leaves and scoffing, “perona said it was. i even bought you caramel popcorn.”

and you found yourself giggling, “you even remember the flavour?”

“i remember everything.” his tone appeared to be nonchalant, “a white tank-top with strawberries on it and a blue-wash jeans, that’s what you were wearing.”

you lips pressed together, “can’t believe you remember that.” you came up to softly poke his side, “who would’ve thought you’re a romantic?”

“yeah, yeah.” he rolled his eyes, biting down an infectious smile, “i just have a good memory.”

“good memory?” you scoffed, “how come you’re such a bad navigator then?”

“tch, i’m just a bit geographically challenged.”

you laughed as your footsteps fell one in front of the other, and he trailed behind wordlessly.

as zoro saw you walk in front of him, your dainty hands interlocking so you could stretch them overhead and the way you looked back at him to beckon him towards you, so as to follow you faster. all of it made his heart twist unnaturally in the pit that was his chest. all of it.

next, you both passed your old high-school. standing at the metallic fence, the sun dipped far below the horizon as the streetlights behind you flickered and came alive. the two of you stood behind the metallic, looking at the buildings that had seen you grow in it’s hallways. when you sighed, the air fogged up just a tiny bit, “your blue jersey from state championships, and black jeans. white adidas too.”

“hm?” zoro cocked his head to your side, and you continued, “that’s what you were wearing on our not-date.”

“you remember?”

you pressed your forehead to the metal, the cold fence digging indentures onto your forehead, “of course i remember. i actually have a good memory.”

the two of your stood in frigid silence and the nightly winds grew stronger around you both. you pulled back, turning your face towards zoro, “it’s growing cold, wanna head back to the car?”

his thumb came up to ease away the red markings on your forehead, the friction of his touches melting away the cold essence of the metal. once he was satisfied with his damage control on your forehead, he nodded, “one more pit stop, then, let’s head back.”

10:02 p.m.

the car was parked in the middle of the field where you had spent reckless evenings just like this with zoro five years prior, to the very field where you had last seen him before he left without a word.

you remembered that cruel night as if it was your whole existence. it might as well have been considering how many time you had replayed the same night in your head over and over and over again, wondering if you had done something stupid.

you had sneaked out of your home, and he had sneaked here after his practice was finally over. his hair was sweaty, boyish features coloured a brutal shade of petrified as he approached you under the night sky.

“what’s wrong?” you had asked once you had noticed his downcast eyes and his shivering hands.

“nothing.” zoro had pressed his lips into a thin smile, “’m just tired from the practice.”

“oh?” you held his palm in yours, pressing a sweet kiss to it, “don’t worry, soon you’d win the state championship and then we would have all the time in the world to hang out, right?”

maybe you should have understood it right then when roronoa zoro simply nodded and looked away you. he had never been a good liar anyways.

that night, you both had sat down on the ground. staring up at the night sky, you had traced the constellations with your finger-tips and made false promises of a candied future that never came by. the soft grass under you both had tainted your cream coloured shorts green that day. yet another cruel reminder of him, yet another proof that he and you were real, yet another physical evidence of the love that once was.

“why’re we here?” you couldn’t be bothered masking up the irritability in your voice. the raw edges of hurt cut right back your mortal body as you stepped out of the passenger seat.

“c'mon.” that’s all zoro said as he lend you a hand and helped you climb the car’s roof top.

“zoro.” you repeated sternly, but he just helped you up without much explanation. once you were perched on the metallic frame, he climbed up and your voice momentarily wobbled, “a-are we sure the roof’s not gonna break?”

“no, ‘snot.” he clarified, slowly inching closer to you till you could feel his body warmth against your arm.

tilting your face upwards, you drunk in the sight of the malevolent sky littered with heavy, grey clouds that covered the usual litter of stars; so cruel but so pretty underneath it all.

zoro pulled his knees to his chest, softly perching his chin atop them with a sigh, “pretty, isn’t it?”

“why’re we here of all places?” you pulled your knees to your chest, mirroring his actions.

“it felt wrong to leave without seeing this place once.” he admitted softly, “d’you hate it that much?”

“yes. i do.” you nodded, burying your face against the jagged, scarred skin of your knees. you hated this place, and the pair of green-stained cream shorts in your cupboard were nothing if not the proof of that.

“such a shame,” he sighed, “’s a pretty place.”

“zoro–” but he cut you off, “we’ve changed so much in these five years, haven’t we? let’s get to know each other again.” he lifted his head to look at you, “what’s your favourite hobby?”

you scoffed, “you’re kidding.”

“i’m not.”

“did perona put you upto this?” your eyes narrowed, head still tipped back to stare at the grumbling sky, “or nami.”

“no.” he stressed, “my hobby is probably playing pool now. luffy put me onto it, it‘s kinda cool.”

“i thought sleeping was your favourite past-time.” you turned to look away from the sky and at him but somehow couldn’t. you sighed, slowly admitting, “that was what you always said in interviews.”

“did you stalk me via interviews?”

you tucked your knees one over the other and straightened up, “says the man who watched every match where I got my ass handed to me.”

“i never said i did or didn’t stalk you.”

“you also didn’t say that you won’t break my heart again.” his eyes were boring into yours as you turned your face to finally find his, “you just said to not pray for you back.”

“would you believe me if i told you i won’t break your heart?”

traces of sleep lingered in his eyes, patterns from guilt long-gone-by traced onto his cheeks. you realized with a certain ache that you would probably believe this man if he told you he made the colosseum in his past life, and that he was Genghis Khan re-incarnated. but the fact that he won’t break your heart again? doubtful.

you turned your face back to the thundering clouds. they flashed a myriad of colours and loud sounds enveloped your mortal figures as they churned impatiently above you. you heaved in a breath. slowly exhaling, you asked, “when i lost women’s doubles against the boa sisters, you know what they said to me?”

you believed he knew the answer, being an interview-stalker himself. but he played along, “what?”

“they asked me if you broke up with me because I threaten your legacy as number one, zoro.” a deep sigh passed you by, “since i’m still number two, and from the looks of it they don’t think i’ll be one any time soon.” a mirthless laugh escaped your lips, “honestly, i don’t think I’ll be one any time soon.”

“do you really think i give a crap about shit like that?” zoro raised his face fully, widened eyes looking at you as if you had just accused him of skinning men alive.

“why else would you leave everything behind to be number one, roronoa?”

to you it was clear. he wanted to be number one, so, he left everything behind to be it. simple as that. he wanted to go after his dreams, so, he sacrificed everything he loved. you just happened to be unfortunate enough to be one of those things he loved. simple as that.

“i promised someone.” he finally admitted when you stayed silent, “back when i was in foster care.”

“what?” you found yourself turning your face to look at his, and the man who stared back at you seemed to be a man ravaged and hunted, like a mere prey for guilt.

roronoa zoro had never kept any secrets from you. never. not when he met you as a kiwi-looking middle-schooler at thirteen, and not when he was about to be twenty-three a decade later. no secrets other than his past in foster care. you knew mihawk adopted him when he was eleven, and perona when she was fifteen but no more than that. his past in the foster-care, that one was off-limits.

no questions, no answers.

and you had never pushed. it was something he wanted to forget and you’d be damned if you brought his demons to his under the pretence of harmless curiosity. that was it.

no questions, no answers.

then why was he speaking of it now?

“i only had this one friend. no. she was more like a sister, really.” his eyes hardened, “kuina. she was obsessed with this game, and i hadn’t even heard of it. every fucking time she got her hands on the tv to the communal room, she would turn on sports channel and tear through them till she found one playing re-runs of badminton.”

your muscles ached, and suddenly you were reminded of the air you had ceased to breath in. zoro continued, “she used to drag me to play, and then she used to beat my fucking ass at it. every fucking time. then, one night…” his voice grew thicker, like tar lodged right in his larynx, “she told me that one day, she would make it out of that shitty foster system and she would be number one.”

“somehow, seven year old me thought it would be fun to argue with her. so, i told her ‘no, i’d be number one and you’d be watching.’ she told me no. she had every right to. she was a better player than I was. she deserved this more than i do.”

“zo,” your hand found his bicep as his eyes glossed over, “you don’t have to tell me.”

but you didn’t know any player by the name of kuina, so, it didn’t take you long to guess where the story was headed. somehow, you stomach still dropped when zoro spoke the next part aloud, “she died a day later. ran into the fucking street while chasing the shuttle that the wind blew over. died on the fucking spot.”

“zoro.”

“i made a promise. a-and she was my sister.”

“zoro.” and you moved to engulf him within your arms. you felt him shudder under you, face pressed to your chest in a bleak effort to hold back tears as you held him tighter and tighter against yourself. as if your weak, mortal body could undo the past or stop him from the torment that was his own mind.

“i’m sorry.” your words paled in comparison to the feelings that brewed within the depths of your stomach. as if to reflect the words you couldn’t utter, drops of rain poured down onto you both mercilessly, as if the skies were mourning.

“i’m sorry.” you repeated, arms moving haphazardly to hold him to yourself closer. his hand moved with just as much desperation, trying to clutch onto you as if you were the only tangible thread of sanity left within him, as if your touch was all that grounded him, kept him alive.

“i- i can’t, i won’t lose you.” he mumbled into your skin, “i won’t let it happen. not again.”

he raised his face to look at you and bloodshot eyes met yours. his hair stuck to his forehead, lips quivering and you couldn’t tell which drops were tears and which rain on his soaked face.

your eyes racked over his frame. from his uncaring hair, to the eyes that had grown weary far too young, to the same pair of lips you had ached to call home, and finally the arms that you had yearned for much the same for the past five years.

“zoro?” you leaned towards him as your voice grew weaker. rain drops on your lips clung helplessly as he followed your voice, face falling forward till your foreheads were mere hairsbreadth apart, “y-yeah?”

why did your breath sound so strained? how come you could feel your heart pumping wildly against the bones lodged in your chest? how could you taste the metallic taste of blood and rain on your lips like as you heaved out ragged words?

you bit your lip to stop it from quivering helplessly. words failing to voice what not even your brain could, you asked for similar candied lies, “say you won’t break my heart again.”

words desperate, he nodded, “i won’t.”

“no,” your breath grew more ragged as each second passed you by, “no. swear on it.”

his calloused palm came to rest on your cheeks, forehead touching as he closed his eyes shut. “i swear on it. i, roronoa zoro, promise to never break your heart again.”

“and if you do?”

“you’re more than welcome to break my skull with my own racket. plummet it down really hard.”

a small smile cracked at your lips, “really?”

“promise.” he hummed. and as he leaned forward to catch your lips against his in a sickly, sweet routine, you pulled back.

he barely had the second to react before you crashed back into him. you couldn’t wait any longer. your lips against his in a clash of teeth and lips and tongue and the faint taste of rain on your skins.

“’s pouring.” he panted, words barely being processed in your lucid state, “wan’ you s’bad though. so, so fucking bad.”

the next you knew, your wet back met the leather backseat of his car.

the sportsman hovered over you momentarily. and next, all you felt was his naked skin pressed to yours, his calloused palms tracing patterns long-forgotten to your sides as he gulped down anything you had to offer. any cries, any grudges, any desires.

you pushed him away just to be able to breath, but air seemed to be the last priority on zoro’s mind as he caught your lips against his in a methodical, little game all over again. panting against your pretty lips, his fingers tried to rid you of your soaked jeans and panties. and all of it was so lewd, so unbearably lewd.

from the sounds of his skin on yours, the sound of the rain violently crashing against the tinted windows and the sounds of his desperate huffs and pants as he tried to manhandle you and get rid of the whatever unholy layers separated you from his feral touches.

“z-zoro,” you stuttered helplessly and the man that peered down at you resembled more a demon ready to fester on the last bit of your lucidity rather than the man you loved.

“c’mere.” he husked, and within moments he was under you. laying prettily on the backseat as your honeyed heat hovered only inches away from his pretty lips. as he stared up at you, his strong arms wrapped around your hips and he pulled you to his lips.

“fuck,” his eyes rolled back as he ran an experimental flick of his tongue against your core, and you flinched, already pulling back from him.

and how could you blame roronoa zoro for tightening his grip against your thighs and fully seating you over his face?

“none of that hoverin’ shit.” he declared in a series of hot pants against your drenched cunt, “let me eat my girl out properly.”

“z-zoro,” you bucked forward as his lips attached around the sensitive nub, sucking like he knew your untimely demise was his very duty. strong fingers digging into the fat of your hips as he ate you out like a man starved, like a man ravished.

it was all so messy, all so untamed, feral. just a mix of spit, your honeyed fluids and his insane determination to make you unravel at the tip of his tongue.

he sneaked in a hand, forefinger and thumb pinching the nub as his tongue delved deeper into your velvety hole. your eyes rolled back as his strokes stayed unrelentless against your heat and you found yourself falling apart at his preying touches, “oh my god, zo. ‘m gonna fuck–”

“cum f’me.” he rasped against you, the other hand coming down to smack the fat of your ass. you ass recoiled under his pressure and you jolted as he rubbed the stinging area better. hot tears pricked at your eyes as he brought down a unrelenting hand at the same strawberry-red patch of skin. the pain mingled in with the methodical strokes of his tongue and the messy rubbing from his fingers pushed you past your limit.

your walls spasmed, sickly sweet dew pooling at his lips as you bucked forward with a strangled cry in your throat, “zoro, zoro, zo.”

you weren’t quite sure if you imagined it, or if you truly felt roronoa zoro smirk against your aching cunt before pressing hot, open-mouthed kisses onto the damage he had done.

as you tried to catch your breath, zoro kissed – no, devoured – your clit. your throbbing bundle of nerves caught between his lips dangerously, he sucked on it as you bucked and keened over him, “one more. c’mon, baby.”

“no, please.” you tried to cry out but the maddened man could hear nothing over the blood rush against his ears and the ecstasy of your orgasm on his tongue. clenching his eyes shut, all he could focus was on the way you squirmed over him. trying to run away? pushing him away?

he couldn’t help but grin like a man gone far too gone because this was like a challenge, and what did roronoa love if not challenges? you were practically begging him to eat you till you cried and begged him to let you go, were you not?

“z-zo.” your voice failed you at your fourth orgasm and all you could feel was the muscle pushing in and out of your sore, aching cunt and his fingers pulling on your nipple so, so meanly. “z-zoro,” you tried again, this time without stuttering, “you’re s’mean, zo.”

“am i?” the way he sounded, you felt like only more torture was on your way, “am i so, so mean?”

you nodded, tears rolling down your pretty face as he thumbed your sore clit and cooed, “sorry, baby.”

“y-you’re not sorry,” you hips spasmed at his careless touches and you threw your head back to hold back a cry, “you’re n-not sorry at all.”

“’m not,” he admitted cockily, pulling you upwards so he could press kisses to your sore thighs, “only i get to ruin my girl.”

“y-your girl?” you sounded so out-of-it, so innocent with the way he had fucked you dumb. wobbly lips, teary eyes and hoarse voice. god, he loved you. he nodded, peering at you as if breaking it down for you, “my girl.”

pulling your quivering thighs off of him, he sat up and softly placed you on his lap. when you met his pussydrunk face, his lips were drenched off of your essence. he wiped his face off the back of his hand, then using the same hand to pull your jaw forward to kiss you senseless all over again.

his mushroom tip sat hotly against your inner thigh, smearing the glossy precum all over your soft skin. as zoro battled his tongue against yours, your nimble fingers toyed with his flushed cock-head. as you softly thumbed the slit, zoro found himself whimpering against your pouty lips, slowly pulling back.

“ah, fuck.” he breathed in slowly, eyes rolling back as you finally stroked his dick. you met his eyes definitively as you brought up your soft palm to your mouth. spitting on his soft skin, you brought it back to his angry shaft nestled against your thighs.

moving it up and down, your face dipped down to his neck to bite down on his pulse. instead of whimpering the way he was, his strong hand came to push your head harder against his tanned skin. he rasped, “harder.”

and you sunk your teeth into his skin with enough force to break his skin, just to find the man under you stutter and his white seed to coat your hand. his hips stuttered, eyes clenching shut as realization set in, “f-fuck. shit hah, i came?”

growing cocky at the way he came undone, you bit down a teensy bit harder. until you felt the sweet taste of iron on your lips and you pulled back to see a small droplet of blood beading at his neck. but before you could apologize, zoro noticed your crimson hued lips. pulling you towards him, he revered in the sweet metallic tang of his blood against your tongue. madman.

the sportsman hummed against you as he pulled your sore hips upwards and positioned his cock to nudge your slit ever-so-slowly.

“mmph, zo–” you tried to speak but his mushroom tip got caught against your clit so deliciously. moaning, he guided his dick to finally push past your hole and your jaw went slack at the sinful stretch.

hair sweaty and clinging to your skin, your head was thrown back as he pistoled his dick in with slow circular motion of his hips, and you tried to ground himself by digging your nails into his shoulders. zoro grinned, his canine on display unabashed, “feel good?”

your jaw slacked open, just for nothing to come forth other than half-coherent jumbles of his name as his tip kissed your sugary sweet spots with the urgency of a madman. shallow thrusts into your cunt only resulted in persistent prodding of his tip against your g-spot. his thumb pressed debauched words to your clit as your hips moved on their accord, with only one goal: to forget anything but his ungodly thrusts into your rueful cunt.

“feel s’good, zo. feel so, so good hah mhph–” you babbled, nodding as he moved your hips up and down to fill you up and leave you empty over and over and over again. a hand snaked upwards to pull at your roots, tipping your head back so that he could sink his teeth and brand up your soft skin just over the column of your throat.

“feel good?” he repeated, eyes almost crossing over at the crimson mark on your neck. if you felt like you were losing sanity, there was no need to feel lonely cause zoro trailed not farther behind. he laughed, bringing you down harder on his shaft, “feel good, baby? does my girl feel good?”

you nodded, eyes clenching shut as his cock massaged your gummy walls and his thumb tortured your poor, aching clit so well.

the familiar feeling built within you again, like a fire that burnt you to a crisp from within. your walls spasmed, head thrown back, drooling as roronoa zoro made it his life’s purpose to fuck you as hard as he could. to a point, where, you felt like he was just holding back to not break you.

“l-look at me, angel.” his hand squished your cheek mercilessly, pulling your face down just to press a mocking peck to your pouty, drooling lips and laugh when you jolted from the orgasm, “oh my g-god, zoro! fuck aah, hah shit shit shit.”

you slumped forward, sweaty forehead pressed to his heaving chest while he continued to fuck into your overused cunt. his thrusts grew weaker – erratic – before he painted your walls white.

“shit, baby.” the man laughed, his chest vibrating from the stuttered falsetto, “one more?”

“zo…” and the way you looked up at him so teary-eyed, shaking your head no. another challenge?

so now, of course zoro had you pressed in such a mean mating press, mumbling against your swollen kiss-bitten lips, “you’re doing so well, baby. ‘m so proud of my girl.”

“y-yeah?” you stuttered out, batting your tear-stained eyelashes so well that zoro couldn’t help but lap at the tear-drops cascading down your cheek, “mhm, course angel. take one more for me, can you?”

you nodded as if you had a choice.

his chest pressed up against yours, broad hand pulling your knees so far high so that he could plunge in and out of you so very easily. zoro panted with every slow drag of his shaft against your addictive, sugar-sweet walls because every small movement seemed to set you alight. your cunt grabbed at him hungrily, clutching him so tightly as if you refused to let him go.

managing a few more thrusts, he brought your weak hand upto his throat and pressed your hand onto his pulse. you stared at him, wide-eyed, before pressing harder. as your soft hand pushed harshly against his pulse, zoro pushed into your heat harder with a low whimper.

his hips sputtered as splashes of white painted your walls all over again.

the sportsman heaved, dipping his sweaty face down to the crook of your neck and pressing his body weight on yours. after what seemed like eons of just catching up his breath, zoro slowly pulled out and you gasped at his absence.

“are you okay?” he pressed a chaste kiss to your collarbone before trailing upwards and pressing another to your cheek. your muscles went slack under him, soreness creeping up the tendrils of your flesh as you fluttered opened your eyes, “’m tired.”

“already?” the man grinned, licking a soft stripe up your jaw. your weak hands pushed him away, groaning, “already?!”

“sorry, c’mere.” settling beside you in the cramped seat, he pulled you to his chest. humming faintly as his fingers softly caressed the damp tressed and you melted against the feel of his warm skin against yours.

the soft pitter-patter of the rain against the windows quietened, the morning mist hovering around the car like some forbidden protector and dew clung helplessly to leaves in the field. zoro pulled you closer to himself, his shallow breath against your forehead and his soft fingertips massaging your sore hips, “i think i love you.”

“you think?” your eyes fluttered open, trailing up softly to take in his peaceful expression. you bit the inside of your cheek, stomach churning as you dug your cheek against his chest and nodded, “i think i love you too.”

──★ ˙🧷 ̟ !!

11th of november, 12:01 a.m.

“go on,” you shoved the cupcake in his direction, the candle light flickering softly and barely holding out against his stuttered breath, “for real?”

“hm,” you nodded, “make a wish, zo.”

“i don’t even have a religion.” he mumbled and you pinched the taut skin of his bicep in retaliation, “jus’ do it.”

“okay, fine. here goes nothing.” he closed his eyes. eyebrows bunching up in concentration and high cheekbones coloured orange from the weak flame. a moment passed by as the two of you stayed huddled on his bed, him praying and you looking at him.

a soft breath and the flame went out. when he opened his eyes, you smiled at him, “what did you wish for?”

“nothing,” he replied softly, calloused fingers interlocking with yours, “think i have everything i could ever need already.”

“happy birthday, zo.” you pecked him and pulled back, but he pulled you back to him.

knock, knock, knock.

“are you both done?” perona knocked at the door, “everyone’s waiting for you out, idiot.”

the next morning your twitter was flooded with the same blurry photo of you kissing zoro at his birthday party.

@/roronoaswifeyy said: yOU TWO ARE MY ROMAN EMPIRE OMG!!! @/sweatytoenails asked: IS THIS ANOTHER PR STUNT?11 OMG I CANNOT TAKE ANOTHER BREAK-UP. @/boaboaboa said: GUYS I THINK THIS PICTURE IS LEGIT, SOMEONE SAW THEM GO ON A ROAD-TRIP TOO

@/monkeydluffyofficial: very proud of zoro to be able to pull such a pretty woman without showering for days on end ❤️😃 @/dailycelebgossip: BREAKING: two-times grand slam winner and current number #1, roronoa zoro confirmed to be going out with his former flame!

@/vinsmokesanjiofficial: we will be releasing an official statement, until then PLEASE STOP TAGGING ME, YOU’RE BLOWING UP MY PHONE. AND @/ynln ANSWER MY CALLS. @/nami_bizconmgmt: like@/vinsmokesanjiofficial said, please wait for the official statement and @/realroronoazoro PICK UP MY CALLS.

zoro wrapped a strong arm around your waist. sleep lingered in his eyes, and the pattern of the pillow case was imprinted onto his skin instead, “what’re you reading?”

you giggled, “people are losing their mind over the fact that we’re dating.” you looked over your shoulder, “can’t believe a PR stunt got us here.”

“oh, about that.” he mumbled, “nami never asked me to do that, i was just feeling bold that day. paid off pretty well though, didn’t it?”

“huh?” your eyes widened, words sinking in at a much slower rate, “HUH?”

“what?”

“HUH?”

“what?” he repeated with a grin, “it worked, didn’t it?”

“YOU ASSHOLE!” you pushed at him and he just held you tighter against his chest, “mhm, love you too.”

ladies and gentlemen, this is your friendly reminder to not go back to your ex by the way! they don't deserve you and aren't roronoa zoro!

a/n: i cannot believe this has come to an end!! aaaah took me fucking forever to finish it (and i have like 5 more characters to write for ://) but im so so grateful for anyone who loved this and has shown me that love. thakyou so much you guys! i'd be making an ao3 soon enough so that it's easier to navigate. again, thankyou for keeping up with me <3 tagging: @litlebruh @mist-ixx @briezy04764 @otkuhotgirl [the credit for feral!zoro goes to her] @mars-mizuko @florallyarranged @ayumitho @lyany2k @dietcokefizz @kokanee-readinglist @angelsforever999 @rengokushuaige @imlikeacoffeeconnoisseur @gojoistetti tysm for reading!! you all were so incredibly nice that im sobbing :')) i hope y'all enjoyed this! much love, vix <3 m.list

#the op aus series <3 #op au #one piece #op #opla #roronoa zoro #zoro x reader #roronoa zoro smut #zoro x reader smut #roronoa zoro x reader #roronoa zoro x reader smut #zoro smut #zoro angst #one piece angst #one piece smut #opla smut #op smut #zoro opla #one piece zoro

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wonustars · 1 year ago

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𝘚𝘦𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘰𝘭 ’𝘴 𝘓𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴 (𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦𝘳)

“𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴, 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘴. 𝘪’𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘭 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳, 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶” - 𝘮𝘢𝘪𝘬𝘦𝘦’𝘴 𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘣𝘺 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘩𝘶𝘴𝘩

story inspirtation came from this poll pairing: c.sc x reader word count: estimated ~10k+ (this teaser: 983 words)

genre: friends to friends with benefits to lovers, slowburn, angst, fluff, smut (mdni)

summary: You and Seungcheol have been friends ever since you were kids. Growing up as neighbours, experiencing all the horrific adolescent moments in high school, and now going to the same University together. Even though you’ve denied it many times to your friends, part of you has always had feelings for him, not that you would ever say it out loud. He is the one person you can trust with anything and everything. So what happens when he propositions the idea of becoming friends with benefits? (the plot maybe change a little while i’m continuing to write but the overall theme will stay the same <;3)

tags: bestfriend!seungcheol, nonidol!au, university!au, female!reader, mutual pining, slow burn so painful you'll feel it in your toes, they are one year apart, SLIGHT like extremely miniscule wonwoo x reader (for the angst mwahahaha), seungcheol is a jealous jealous man, they're both idiots, jeonghan is a menace as always, seungcheol has a lot of pride, so does the reader, (i'll add more once its finished lol)

warnings/smut: this will be added on in the full post.

taglist: open! send an ask, dm, or comment to be tagged for when i post the full fic.

notes: long time no post everyone.... a LOT of people voted for an s.coups story on my poll so i'm here to deliver mwahahahaha...ALSO im so proud of the banner i made like udek i love how it looks hehhehe, i spent a good hour or so on it T-T ! i really have an urge to write a longer story, so idk when i'll be finished because it may take me a while to finish so sorry in advance. I just started writing and I was playing Mikee's Letters by Just Hush during it and so i thought id incorperate the song into the story, but barely lol (its a tagalog song so sorry if the translation is a lil rough my tagalog is not the most accurate). this story is SOOOOOO self indulgnet that it should be criminal lol BUT im really excited to write this and im really excited to share it with everyone,,, but first i actually got to finish it hehe. talk to u soon, mwah <3!

As long as you could remember you and Seungcheol have been attached to the hip. Even though he was a year older than you, you couldn’t remember the last time you spent a day without him. You’ve been in each others lives ever since then, starting all the way from the young, bright age of 5, when you and your family moved into the small, humble house across his. Although your parents weren’t very well off, Cheol was. It was an odd thing that you two were neighbours because his house was much more grand, and nicer kept than yours. This didn’t really bother you growing up though, he always made you feel like an equal.

Seungcheol has been with you through it all, the petty fights in middle school to the pains of adolescence in high school. He’s seen you at your worst, like the time you tripped and fell trying to impress a cute guy at school, which resulted in a nose bleed. You were so embarrassed but at the end of the day Cheol was there to help you clean your bloody nose and pick you back up. A true night and shining armor, which was practically his brand. He was the one to patch up your heart, breakup after breakup. Always your shoulder to lean on when you’re feeling down, and especially when you’re happy.

A man and bestfriend like Choi Seungcheol didn’t come around very often, and you took notice of that since you were young. You cherish every moment you have and will have with him. He is a true gentleman with a heart of gold. He’s handsome, smart, rich and caring. Every single box on your list is ticked off when it comes to him. Yet, you know that no matter how hard you love him, you will only ever be his bestfriend. The girl he sees as practically his younger sister. The bittersweet feeling of being so close to him tugs your heart till its torn. It took you a long time to accept that all you’ll ever be is his bestfriend, and even now, you’re still trying to accept this fact.

...

Seungcheol has always seen himself as your best friend. The man that will be there for you when you have no one else to turn to. He has never seen you as more than his best friend, his y/n. He is a man who never second-guesses himself, always keeping a strong-willed sense of mind. Every time one of his friends asked him if he had feelings for you, he would simply answer no; and that you were like a younger sister to him.

That first year was lonely for him, he didn’t really know anyone and all his classes kept him away from socializing. The only thing that seemed to have stayed constant was you. You face-timed him at least once a week before he went to bed, never forgetting to remind him how much you missed him, and how much you cared for him. In the simplest words, you were his rock for that first year.

Seungcheol was never warned about how lonely and jarring your first year could be. The change in place, people, and most importantly the change in the fact that you weren’t there experiencing it beside him. He was never one to believe clichè sayings, but he finally understood what the saying “distance makes the heart grow fonder” really felt like. He had gotten so overwhelmed from the loneliness he even began to write you letters, ones he would never actually send out, as cheesy as it sounds. But knowing that he was addressing them to you brought him some type of solace in that first year.

A year later you came to study at the same university, and he was elated, to say the least. Finally, he had thought to himself. The one person he hadn’t been able to see, smell, or touch for a year was finally going to be in his proximity.

Unlike Cheol, you were only able to go to this school through bursaries and scholarships, your parents simply just couldn’t afford to send you to school in a different city otherwise. It reminded you how lucky Seungcheol was to receive support from his parents, getting and going to school was nothing he had to ever think twice about. You knew you could’ve stayed with your family, and gone to school closer to your house, but with Cheol away, it just wasn’t the same. Nothing had felt the same since he left. But this didn’t matter to you the moment you felt his arms wrap around you again.

You stood there in the airport all alone, eyes searching for a head of freshly dyed blond hair. The moment you heard his voice call your name, you knew you were finally home.

“Y/n!” An excited, deep voice calls out for you.

You whip your head around to see him. The man you hadn’t seen in so long, the man you were so desperately in love with. Your best friend.

“Cheol!” A squeal escapes your lips, you run to him. He pulls you into a tight hug, wrapping his large hands around your smaller frame. Swinging you around like crazy, a laugh bubbles up from your throat.

“I’ve missed you so much y/n.” Cheol exasperates as he hugs you tighter, leaving a kiss on the top of your head.

“I’ve missed you too Cheol…” You whisper into his chest, breathing in his expensive cologne, not caring that you are in public; staying there to embrace him for a weirdly long period of time. “Never leave for that long again.”

#seventeen x reader #seventeen smut #seungcheol x reader #seungcheol smut #scoups smut #scoups #seungcheol #choi seungcheol #seventeen fanfic #seventeen fluff #seungcheol fluff #scoups fluff #scoups angst #seungcheol angst #seventeen angst #wonustars ✧ ﾟ. {works}#wonustars ✧.* {fics: seungcheol’s letters}

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buggybambi · 10 months ago

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Ooo hiii! Can I please request a Carmy x fem!reader where he proposes to her on Valentine’s Day? Ooo and maybe this is the au where she’s his assistant, and has been for years, and the staff is heavily involved in the proposal hehe

Also Richie making some joke about how this is some promotion she’s getting lmao

hope this is okay my love! i honestly had no idea i had an au where she's an assistant lmao! i also changed it a little bit, hope that's okay ♡ - wc: 1.02k | nav post - request guidelines | cw: fem!reader, mention of reader wearing a dress

"You're not seriously proposing, are you?" Richie asks Carmen as the two prepare the Beef for it's opening. Carmen lets out a sigh as he ties his apron behind his back. "And who the hell told you?" Carmen questions in return.

"Sugar did. You proposin' or what?" Richie repeats, as Carmen rolls his eyes. "Cousin, you are not to say a word about this to anyone, okay?" He lets out a long exhale. "I am. Tonight." Carmen confirms as Richie stares at him. "Oh my gosh, you're gonna marry your assistant. If only we had an HR that could have a field day with you."

"I'm basically HR, cousin." Carmy reminds as he walks over to Marcus. "Chef, how's it going?" He asks as he rubs his hands together. "I have got our Valentine's day treats prepped, and I even have a cake prepared for when you propose to your girl." Marcus grins as Carmen rolls his eyes. "Maybe Sugar is the one I should tell to shut up." He mumbles before he walks over to his station.

"So, any big plans for tonight?" He overhears Syd ask you as you and her handle cleaning one of the other stations. "None at all. Why is everyone asking me that today?" You laugh, a sound that he can't help but smile at, as you walk over to Marcus with the clipboard he assigned to you three years ago when you began working as his assistant.

It was Sugar really who gave him the idea of getting an assistant. She told him, "you're busy. You can't handle your own schedule or meetings, so hire someone to do it for you." She was the one to pick you out from a list of candidates, and from the moment he met you, he was in love with you.

But, in usual Carmen fashion, he took forever to get with you. Convincing himself you wouldn't feel the same way, that you wouldn't even want to be with him. Until you told him first that you loved him and had been in love with him. From there you two were kind of like the Jim and Pam of the Beef, at least that's what Sydney referred to you too as.

"Hi Marcus. Oh, cute treats." You greet with a smile as you lean against the wall by his station, clipboard resting face-up against your front. "What's with that cake?" You ask, looking at the clipboard for any orders that may have been placed.

"Uh, I asked him to make it. Pete and I's anniversary is coming up and we didn't save any of our wedding cake so I asked Marcus to recreate it." Nat swoops in, smiling at you. You nod slowly. "Right.. well, congrats on your anniversary, Sug." You say before you turn and walk over to Carmen.

"Hey you. Clear your calendar because I am setting up a date night for us." Carmen says as he leans on the counter, standing in front of you. "Mm. Can I ask what we're doing on this date night or is it a total surprise?" You ask.

"Total surprise. I'll pick you up at your place." He kisses you on the cheek before walking off. You laugh before going back to your clipboard filled with Carmen's list of activites and meetings for the day. ────

You sat on your sofa, the dress you first met Carmen in on you. You figured with it being Valentine's Day, the nostalgia of the first time you met him would be nice for the date night Carmy had planned.

A small knock from the front door, and you stood from your spot and walked over to answer it. Fixing your hair as you stood in front of the door for a second, you opened it, expecting to meet Carmen's eyes. Instead, you found him on one knee in front of you, one hand behind his back.

"I was going to do this at a restaraunt. Or on the sidewalk, or literally any-fucking-where else." He admits with a breathy laugh following. "But, I couldn't wait. I couldn't imagine myself doing this anywhere else and of course it's like me to do this at your front door on your welcome mat."

"I love you. I've loved you since I met you, and each day that passes I find myself falling more and more in love with you. You're my everything, you're my moon and stars- no, you're my fucking universe." He shakes his head, tears in his eyes. "And I can't imagine a world or my life without you there. I want you and I to build a life together. To have a family with you if that's what we find ourselves wanting." He smiles. "Will you make me the happiest man, even though you already have, make me an even happier man and marry me?"

As soon as he pulls the ring out you're already saying yes, practically dragging him up off the ground so you can kiss him. He slides the ring onto your finger before kissing you again. You pull away, laughing as you place a hand on his cheek. "Carm, I love you so much- was everyone else in on this!?" You ask through a laugh.

"They were. Sugar kept telling everyone, I'm shocked no one spilled." He laughs as well, wrapping his arms around you to hug you, burying his face in your neck. "Okay, seriously no Valentine's day will ever top this." You say.

────

It doesn't shock anyone when you show up to work the next day with the ring on your finger, and the story of him proposing on your doorstep doesn't shock anyone either. "Is this her getting a promotion?" Richie asks with a grin as you roll your eyes. "If we had an HR department I swear I'd file a report against you."

"You're technically marrying the HR department." Carmen says softly as you grin. "Hell yes I am." You place a kiss on his cheek. "Hey, now as your assistant I get to schedule your wedding." You note as he smiles, pressing his forehead against yours.

"Can't wait for it."

˙ ✩°˖🌸 ⋆｡˚꩜

thank you for reading! please feel free to engage with this post by reblogging, commenting or sliding into my inbox to leave feedback! i appreciate all of you! check out my nav post here for more fanfics!

- mae:)

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to join my taglist please reply to this post asking to be added!

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saeslove · 10 months ago

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YOU ALWAYS HAD ME — synopsis: what would you do if your hot best friend agreed to fake date you to make your ex-boyfriend jealous? will it ruin your friendship or will it prevail into something more?

⤿ [ 11 ] timestamps do not matter.

One of your favourite things you did growing up to find solace outside of your rowdy home was sitting by the porch, drinking in the starry night above you. Usually, you had company; your Persian cat, Kiki who has found herself a new owner; Gojo Satoru.

“What’s going on that pretty little head of yours?” Your thoughts, are instantly broken by the low yet smoky voice of the man you were falling in love with. — your best friend, your fake boyfriend.

“Nothing”

“Lies. I’ve been searching everywhere for you but then your kind mother told me this is your favourite spot.” You felt the plank beneath you creak and found yourself a new company.

“You were looking for me?” Your voice came out barely a whisper.

Tucking away the strands of hair behind your ear, “Yeah?.”

Your heart skipped a beat.

So did the clock.

10 minutes till Midnight.

“Can we end this, Satoru?”

“What?”

"You heard me."

"So that’s on your mind? Is that why you invited me here? To break up with me in front of your family's porch? Or did Toji text you back? I-"

"Satoru, do you want to know what I dislike about you?"

"If it's me stealing your chocolates, I'm sorry. Please don't end this"

You cupped his face, the warmth from the contact of your hands and his face kept you alive. He looks so cute with his face being squashed. His bright blue eyes on you, pouting.

"Wrong. I don't like it when you cut me off and you’re so dramatic ‘toru! Toji hasn’t texted me since forever! But it doesn’t matter anyway because I love you."

His pout, was instantly replaced with a smile like a kid who got candy from his mother.

"Then will you shut me up by kissing m-"

You threw your body weight on him, snaking your arms around his neck, playing with the underside of his undercut. It's so hot. Supposedly a small fleeting kiss immediately turned into a passionate heated kiss, outside your family's porch.

You gasped in surprise at the sensation of his hands tucking underneath your shirt, pinching your skin.

The kiss that breaks apart, left you both catching for air.

Removing his hands that previously rested under your shirt, sliding in your palms, stroking your hands with his thumb.

"You're so cute. I like the taste of your lips on mine. And I love you too, YN. Always have been, ever since high school. We grew up together so technically, I watched you grow up heh. Watching you have your first boyfriend broke my heart, but if that was the price for me to pay seeing you so happy, I'd gladly break my heart a thousand times over. But a part of me wished it was me who made you smile. So when he broke your heart, it was as if the whole world just crashed on me. You, out of everyone deserve so much love."

Like as if that wasn't enough to tug your heartstrings,

"YN, can I be your boyfriend? I'll love you with everything that I have, I promise."

“Here’s a pen for you baby”

“What for?”

“Hmm? To tick off the the rest of your checklist sweetheart”

hiiii …. 🫣🫣🫣 imcoming fluff chapters enjoy it while it lasts. i love them sm omg. pls ignore the fact that it’s almost feb.. and im posting abt new years HAHAHA the nicknames!!!! i hope it’s not too rush omds..

💞 in the title means new years special hehe

taglist: @hexrts-anatomy @k4romis @soy-garbage @avatar-of-procrastination @lees-chaotic-brain @pastatata @maybe-a-bi-witch @vivi-loves-penguins @reagan707 @iluv-ace @dazaisfavgf @tiredflame132 @dreamxiing @inorixonline

feedbacks and reblogs appreciated! 💕💕 pls be kind to me

series m.list | main m.list

@ satoluv do not plagiarize, translate, or rewrite my writings without my permission !

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jujutsu kaisen smau #jjk smau #gojo satoru #gojo satoru smau #gojo smau #satoru smau #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x reader smau #gojo satoru x y/n #gojo satoru x y/n smau #queued to prime time!#reblog please! tq bbies #lily writes! ೀ⋆｡˚

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fiddlepickdouglas · 4 months ago

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Where do you watch your Thai BL dramas and do you recommend any to start with?

WOW how did I miss seeing this????

Oh boy this is gonna take a while for me to properly answer because you managed to ask, in so few words, a question that has a long answer! (Which I am all too delighted to give, HEHE)

This ended up being such a long post omg, here's a read more.

So starting with where: There's quite a few places. Streaming services with a prescription, YouTube, and even a few free sites where fans will typically upload content (depending on availability and access, these update latest if a show can be found at all).

Streaming platforms (featuring Chinese, Taiwanese, Japanese, Korean, and Thai content):

iQiyi - Chinese owned, has a free option with ads and a subscription option. Also features bonus content on certain shows that subbed users can access if you're into that. Has a good balance of stuff that isn't LGBTQ+, lots of great Chinese wuxia - I'm honestly amazed they have as much queer shows as they do but I am not complaining because there's a lot of good ones there.

GagaOolala - Taiwanese owned, has a free option with ads and a subscription option. Stout LGBTQ+ collection. There's certainly other programming but it's thing is being more out and proud, so it's a win for me.

Viki - American owned, allows users to add/edit subtitles. I haven't used this one much, but I haven't needed to get a subscription so far with the shows I have sought to watch and haven't been bothered with ads either? Not sure how that works but I haven't needed to bother looking into it lol

Other sources I've used to watch other BLs are YouTube (there's so many, and they're for FREE), DramaCool, kisskh, and Bilbili.

In this next bit, I'll be summarizing different studios that produce Thai shows, including Thai BL specifically. I'll summarize the studio and then list recommendations for shows.

First up:

GMMTV - (most content on YouTube, some has been put on iQiyi and Gaga though) This is a popular one for Thai shows, and Thai BL especially. It's nicknamed the Disney of BL for a reason (pumps out a lot of new shows each year, huge roster of actors signed to them, very focused on branding and promotion, etc.). A lot of people's first Thai BLs are among their shows, since it was the company that produced the show that launched Thailand's BL industry onto the map. They can be hit or miss with the level of satisfaction, but overall there's plenty to choose from and much to recommend.

Shows I recommend from this company:

Bad Buddy

This is the first one I watched and it changed my fucking life. Pat and Pran are the perfect mix of next door neighbors who were raised to be rivals, but they can't help becoming friends, and eventually fall for each other. It does great subversion of a number of tropes and has a kissing scene that so memorable I bought a t-shirt that's worn in it. The acting is superb and it's both funny and devasting in a lot of good ways. There's a sapphic side couple who are incredibly cute as well!

Be My Favorite

Pisaeng and Kawi, two guys who can't seem to accept their feelings, each live out multiple time lines where they can't help but be drawn together when Kawi is given a time traveling device. This show ponders the affects of one's actions and how living your truth can make or break the happiness you seek in life. This show was unprecedented in how good it was, especially since the leads were an unusual pairing. I love them I love them I love them.

SOTUS

This is the one that kick-started everything back in 2016 for Thai BL. It follows a group of college freshman who are subject to ritual hazing by their seniors, and one student worms his way into the heart of the senior leader. This show set out to censor fags (cigarettes) and not fags (gays). There's so much cultural significance that it's difficult to describe. It sets the tone for a number of BLs to follow.

Not Me

Do you like gays? Do you like social activism? Do you like batshit plots that put you on your fuckin knees for the whole ride? Have we got a show for you. I don't know how to summarize this one without immediately feeling insane, I love this show with all my goddamn heart. Twins Black and White get separated because they have a connection where they can feel the same things when they're close, and it has proven dangerous. Black gets put in a coma and White takes on his identity and joins an anarchist gang to find who hurt his brother. Not everything is what he thinks, though. Also this show inspired my first tattoo because Yok is my favorite boy forever and ever amen.

The Warp Effect

Alright, it's not a BL, technically, but my GOD is it queer. Don't believe me? Here's a list that I made of not even all the reasons why this show is so queer. It addresses so much about sex ed, relationships, consent, kink, body shaming, and even features a non-binary character. A boy, who made a promise to his late mother to save his virginity until marriage, breaks the promise and wakes up in the future. He has to help old friends and acquaintances resolve things that happened on that fated night if he hopes to return to his youth.

3 Will Be Free

Also technically not a BL, but it is poly!! A sex worker, a club host, and the son of a mafia boss end up on the run together after being involved with the wrong people and being in the wrong place...and killing a guy. By the same director of The Warp Effect, so you're guaranteed a similar flavor of thorough queerness.

More shows by the company that I recommend: A Tale of 1000 Stars, Moonlight Chicken, Enchanté, Vice Versa, The Eclipse, My School President, Wandee Goodday, Only Friends, Midnight Musem, The Gifted (those last two aren't BLs but the vibes are there).

Next up!

Idol Factory - (YouTube channel for watching) Founded by actor Saint Suppapong with the purpose of creating a studio that harbors a safer and more positive experience for people in the industry. Well known for producing one of the first and most popular GLs or girls love shows.

Shows I recommend from this company:

GAP The Series

Sam has been Mon's idol since she was little and now she's secured a job working at her company! She's so excited! Until she realizes that Sam is...kind of heartless. Her unwillingness to let her boss walk all over her does more than win over a good professional relationship. It's got all the drama of class divide and arranged marriage along with it, so it's a fun ride and makes for an iconic entry for lesbian cinema.

The Sign

Phaya and Tharn aren't just reincarnated lovers, they weren't even human before! The story follows a curse that's followed them since they first met as naga and garuda, both powerful legendary creatures who have fought each other for ages. In the present, they train as police officers and end up working together in a case related to Tharn's tragic past.

The Loyal Pin

This one actually hasn't started airing yet (August 4th!!!!) but it's about a lady and a princess who grew up together. From the looks of things, it's gonna have drama and angst up the wazoo so I'm looking forward to it.

More shows by the company that I recommend: Secret Crush On You (I haven't personally seen this one but it's been on my list and highly recommended)

Next up!

Domundi - (uncensored versions on iQiyi, cut versions on YouTube) It's more of a "content creator" company, so it includes musicians as well as actors, so there's not many shows under their wing. But they are good with high heat (more explicit) BL stories. One currently airing, Battle of the Writers, includes Chinese wuxia elements which is incredibly interesting and kinda ballsy (there's suspected attempts to lower viewership for censorship reasons). I highly recommend watching it just for the sake of elevating it, there's a cut version on YouTube.

Shows I recommend from this company:

Bed Friend

Poor Uea is traumatized to hell and back; it's like the world is out to get him. He and his coworker King decide after a one night stand to be exclusive fuck buddies, and ngl it's HOT. We get catboy kinks in this one! Their connection deepens and they have to figure out what they both want from each other. Also all the shitheads get owned, it's really nice to watch. It inspired a Jennette McCurdy meme from me.

Middleman's Love

This is the story of Uea's best friend Jade, who sees how happy his friend is in his new relationship, and takes his turn being Emma Woodhouse. Well....it doesn't go to plan. He keeps pushing Mai toward someone else and doesn't realize that Mai likes him. This one starts incredibly goofy (I put that as a warning), and then gets steamy later on.

Battle of the Writers

This one just started airing! Ob-un is accused of plagiarizing fellow author Chan, and after things have been cleared they end up on a writing team together. The wuxia characters here are characters from their novel. It seems their relationship will parallel certain aspects of the story.

Next company!

Wabi Sabi - (YouTube channel for shows) They've recently lost a whole bunch of actors (several to GMMTV no less) due to terminating artist management, so I'm not sure what the future looks like, but they've released several shows that are considered BL staples.

Recommended:

Until We Meet Again

Dean and Pharm are reincarnated lovers who previously had a tragic end. This one is heavy on the emotions, the first 10 minutes took my fucking knees out. Has lot of themes of intergenerational trauma and how important having supportive parents can be. Pharm is so cute, I need to squish him!

Between Us

It starts around the same time as Until We Meet Again, but from the perspective of Team and Win. They have their own angst issues and family traumas that make them messy, and there's a lot more development of the side characters that were featured in the first series as well. I especially enjoy the sideplot for gamers Waan andTul, lol, I wish they could get their own series too! I do recommend watching UMWA first if you don't want to be confused about a few scenes in this one.

Final company, let's go!

Change 2421 - The company that made the omegaverse alpha-alpha car racing BL. That one. Need I say more?

Recommended:

Pit Babe

Mx. omegaverse alpha-alpha car racing BL themself. Babe is a star racecar driver with special abilities. He's charmed when he meets Charlie, but things begin to change for him faster than he can recognize. The home he ran away from tries to force him back as he attempts to reveal its worst secrets.

This Love Has No Long Beans

This is currently airing! Oab is your chef from Kitchen Nightmares that judges harshly with a tough exterior but genuinely has a good heart. Having lost his passion for cooking, he decides to set up a contest to find a successor to take over his restaurant. Plawan chooses to enter this contest despite having no skills and already having gotten on Oab's bad side. Things get heated when Plawan's determination to make it through the competition ignites the passion for cooking again.

There's plenty more companies, but these are the ones I am most familiar with. But there's still more!

Shows I recommend that aren't from the companies listed above:

Kinnporsche

The mafia BL that took over. I have so much brain rot about this one that it's hard to summarize without going crazy. Porsche and his brother have been struggling to keep their beloved family home, so he takes an offer he can't refuse - working as a mafia bodyguard. Kinn, the current mafia head, is undeniably attracted to him and it ends up making them inseparable in more ways than one. I especially enjoy the side couples, VegasPete and KimChay (there is ENDLESS insanity from all possible pairings tbh).

Love in the Air

It's kinda split into two stories, Payu (or Phayu, honestly the spelling gets switched a lot and even I don't stick to one thing) and Rain, and Prapai and Sky. PayuRain are the most couple ever, that's just the best way I can put it. The actors have incredible chemistry and set a fucking standard for making out. Sky and Prapai will make you cry. They handle some pretty intense material and do an incredible job with it. Also bisexuals with motorcycles and light mafia action.

I Told Sunset About You/I Promised You The Moon

Not only an iconic BL series that strives for telling an incredibly realistic story (no goofy sound effects or gags here), but the cinematography is absolutely gorgeous. Also the messiest bisexual awakening known to man. Oh my god. So much crying. Sooooo much angst. It's okay if you throw shit over this one, it's worth it, I promise. Tee and Oh go through pretty much everything that could make weaker couples hate the other person and that's what makes them top tier.

Ingredients

This whole series is a grocery store commercial? Ignore that, these roommates have the most adorable development. I binged this and was crying at 2am. Tops is an aspiring chef and Win is his himbo roommate who is trying to make it as a musician. As they each work toward their dreams, they become important aspects of each other's lives. Also, if you don't come out of this obsessed with Jeff Satur (or anything else he does), I will question your taste. Pun intended.

Old Fashion Cupcake

Japanese BL? Older queers? Office romance? Age gap? A confession scene that meets Jane Austen level standards of desperation? Togawa and Nozue are something else man. They make it a game to pretend to do what young women do as an "anti-aging" technique, but really it's Togawa's scheme to hopefully catch the eye of his boss. Incredible, no notes except maybe I'd like to have a Thai remake? Please?

And last but absolutely not least...

Semantic Error

A fantastic Korean BL. Rivals to lovers and 10000% ADHD4autism. Jang Jaeyoung is prevented from graduating by Chu Sangwoo and makes it his personal mission to get under his skin. And well....it works lol. They're both the most characters, I adore them and their chaotic stumbles into romance. Bonus Choi Yoona bisexual goddess side character, we love her.

Kiseki: Dear To Me

Taiwanese BL that's also split somewhat split between two stories. Zong Yi takes in a wounded Zhe Rui. The student realizes he's keeping a gangster in his dorm and tries to ignore his charms but ends up being drawn into his world. Meanwhile, Ai Di and Chen Yi, other members of the gang, deal with the consequences of Zhe Rui's disappearance.

Well. That was a whole lot. I hope this isn't too overwhelming for you! I've only been in the BL fandom for a couple years so this is barely scratching the surface as far as what's out there.

#answered #loveofmyknife #long post #thai bl #bl series #good god there is too much to tag here #i hope this answers things for you

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