#because i wrote out his full story on this blog and i need a tag for him

[wonallofme]

Hi guys, I know I'm fairly new here but I want to say thanks for the 600+ notes that let it out, loser! received. Honestly, I didn't expect it. I wrote it only because I deeply needed to write something after so much time of not doing anything, and it was just something I thought and immediately wrote in one go. I never thought it would get this kind of attention.

I'm glad there are people that enjoyed it enough to even start following me. Maybe for some it's not much, but to get more than 50 followers in 24 hours impressed me. So, for all the love it received, thank you guys.

I hope I get to write more in this little blog, and I would love to receive some ideas or interact with you. I wouldn't say my requests are open since I can promise anything, but I would love to read your ideas and maybe do some hard hours (these, of course, aren't full stories so they would be easier for me to answer).

In the case of full fics, although I'm pretty fond of long ones (4k to 15k words, that's my limit), they take a lot of my time and drain me. In my last blog I suffered a big slump because of the group situation, the energy it took me to write and because I got an attention I didn't feel I deserved if I couldn't create perfect fics. For many months I could barely write without tossing ideas, but I want to change this and continue writing because, even with all the time and energy it takes from me, I enjoy doing it.

I love writing because it helps me disconnect with reality, and I'm happy when I see people enjoying my fics and they get to be a little self indulgent. If you have any particular thing/characteristic you'd like to talk about, I'd love to read it. In my last blog, and until now, I'm very happy to write about chubby/plus size readers, but if it's about big breasts, sporty body type, or any unconventional characteristic you would like to self indulge into, I have no problem imagining/talking about it. (I want to highlight the word unconventional. I know not specifying helps to develop inclusion, but being seen definitely helps too. I think there are attributes that have already been seen here in the app/fandom, specially those related to the norm of femininity and beauty standards such as being small/petite/short, and like a girl that's out of that standard, I wish to make my peers feel seen too. Still, I'd never like to exclude anyone (fem!reader) in my blog, so, if not asked for, I also write fics without specifications, which you can identify by looking at the trigger warning/tag section at the start of every post.)

I think I made it clear that I just love interactions. I want to write long/short fics, hard hours or even to talk about things that aren't related to those two. I just ask for your patience if it takes me a little to answer because I work, participate as a TA in one of my old classes and I'm currently preparing an article for my grade.

To end this long message, I would like to thank you guys again. I hope I get to hear more from you, and that you all have a great day!

— credits for the edit to my friend, fairy.

[earthtooz]

omgomg hi i literally love every single thing u post esp the dr ratio content we r getting recently (we are being ABSOLUTELY FED and i'm FERAL for ur characterisation of him)

if u dont mind sharing do u have any tips for new bloggers(?) tumblr writers(?) to grow platforms 😔😔 i myself have posted a couple of things but they aren't gaining much traction 😔

first of all, thank yew anon!! 🙆🏻‍♀️🙆🏻‍♀️ much love, i’m very happy that you’re enjoying my dr ratio content because tbh… it’s not going to stop HAHAH he is here to stay.

second of all, i’ve been here for almost three years so i hope i have some good tips to share 😔 they are below the cut !!

everything on this list is targeted at gaining traction with likes and reblogs rather than focusing on your writing!! pls keep that in mind ;o

1. blog layouts and post layouts.

generally speaking, if a reader is scrolling through the tags, the first impression they get of your fic is how neatly it is laid out. a more aesthetically pleasing layout is always going to capture someone’s attention, regardless of the story.

take a scroll through the tags and maybe find inspiration (don’t steal layouts!) as to how some writers have arranged theirs. normally it incorporates a cute banner/picture with a/n’s or warnings.

also, this may just be personal taste, but don’t post your fic in small text. small text fics are the ones i get turned off the most because i… don’t want my eyes to hurt 😔😔 simple as that 😔😔 even if the synopsis sounds great, i want to see your story in full, not in tiny!!

2. write broader and more cliché tropes at first

i just wanted to reiterate again, this post is not to help you improve your writing quality (bc mine is still ass lol). from when i was still starting out on tumblr and trying to get a following, i think i focused quite a bit on writing tropes that i know everyone will enjoy.

these generally are like the cliché ones, like hurt/comfort, sleeping on the couch, being clingy or whatever, just fluffy stories that you find everywhere.

for example, in 2021, i wrote jujutsu kaisen headcanons of you sleeping on the couch and like… that fic is still getting notes to this day (to my chagrin). so the more cliché, or fluffier, the stories you write, the better.

(MINORS LOOK AWAY, as an sfw writer, i wont sit here and act like people don’t enjoy nsfw though, so if you’re capable of doing so AND OF AGE, then why not try your hand 🤣🤣)

3. long fics and stories that take a lot of effort

despite how many short blurbs you may see in the tags on tumblr, a lot of people do enjoy long fics (me included!). people love their long fics with classic tropes interwoven throughout.

ofc, use the tags as they are the medium that you’ll be guaranteed interaction! i don’t think i need to tell anyone that anymore LUL

but these tips are the ones i have conjured off the top of my head. whether or not you choose to listen is completely up to you, but i wholeheartedly believe rule 1 is one to follow, no matter what. rule 2 is a great one to implement, and rule 3 is just bc i love reading long fics, as with a lot of other readers!

i hope this post has been helpful even just slightly :) thank you for your ask, anon! and i wish you much luck for your writing journey 🍀

[seldnei]

Taking stock of the writing: 2023

For any new followers: this is my annual post about my writing in the past year.  This is purely for my own mental health–the tag says “seldnei is tired of feeling like a slacker” for a reason.  Please feel free to skip.

So what did I accomplish in 2023?

Well, it was a helluva year, again.  We’ve acquired another teenager, with all that entails, which is a good thing overall but definitely added some chaos.  My boss retired earlier than expected, so day job went sideways for a while.  My cousin died, which was entirely unexpected.  My father died, which was both more and less unexpected.  Also the eldest BFF’s mom died, which was not traumatic for me, per se, but being able to spend a week with him was, like acquiring Q, a good thing surrounded by chaos.  Oh, and Z got his ADHD diagnosis, which has triggered some interesting realizations about the assumed neurotypicality of everyone in the household.  We are, in fact, that family who said, “But that can’t be a ‘disorder’; everyone is like that, right?”

I am exhausted, and my brain feels not only full but occasionally like it’s eating itself with self-analysis.

BUT.  I am here.  And I wrote things.

Stories/Poems/Etc.

Finished the second Exorcist story, and decided it did need to be mashed up with the first one.  I dunno, it’s still cuter than I like. 

Did the requested rewrite on the Teachout camel story, and got rejected again (I vaguely recall this as another rewrite request, but I could be wrong and can’t be arsed to dig through my email right now). I kind of think this editor and I have fundamentally different ideas as to what these stories are.  Keep this in mind as I get into future plans, btw, as it was a contributing factor.

Wrote some more TMA fanfic.

“And the Forest Sings of Secrets and the Dead” for FUCKIT, which prompted the best review of all time from Q: “What the fuck, Laura?”

“The Modern Eurydice: with Leto in the Mountains of Delos,” also for FUCKIT, which is probably my favorite thing I wrote this year.  I really hope there are more modern Eurydice stories somewhere in my head, because I loved writing this one and the first one.

Poetry:

“Elpis at the Farmer’s market” for FUCKIT

“4am, April 2023,” also for FUCKIT, the poem my husband wants to frame and put on the wall

Random bits and bobs in my notebook

I wrote three podcast scripts because I really want to make a podcast. 

Script one is a monologue type thing, continuing my explorations of ghosts and terrible mothers.

Scripts two and three are the first two episodes of a short series that adapts the not!Tempest/not!Mosquito Coast/not!Island of Dr Moreau thing I’ve been fucking around with for like four years now.  I think three more scripts and I’ll have the series completed, and then I can turn my attention to things like casting and recording and editing and hosting and posting and dear lord what the fuck.

 I started a bunch of other things:

The baseball/ghost romance novella, where I am trying out iterative outlining.

Some abortive attempts to find my way into my post-apocalypse cunning folk thing

A start and some notes for a gothic horror story that I probably will get back to in a while (watch this space in, like, three years)

Other Stuff

“An Oral History: The Dead Queen at 1223 Murchison Row” sold and came out in Artifice & Craft. 

I created my author website, which I’m still very pleased with.  Also did some blogging, but not as much as I would have liked.  Still, not sure when I had time?

Submitted things sporadically.

Kept up my morning writing routine, though it did have some disruptions here and there and the time got a little compressed.  But the biggest thing, I think, is that I kept going.  There was a lot of stuff going on in my life this year, and I wrote through it all.

Novel and Goals for 2024

Okay, this is where we get into the stuff that makes me nervous.

So the novel is on a second round of reading at a publisher.  This is taking forever, but the publisher has also posted periodically that they’re still working their way through subs, and frankly, I am entirely willing to let them do their thing because, as I said last year, I think this might be the absolute worst time to try and find an agent or publisher.  This is one of like two sparks of interest I have gotten for a book that a professional editor says is very good, so … yeah, we will let that lie.  Additionally, I’ve been reading some stuff from established trad authors who are also  having issues selling things, and I’m like … uuuggghhh.

Bearing that in mind … I’m going to start looking at and dipping my toe into self-publishing this year.  Guys, I am so tired of thinking about what an editor might or might not find appealing enough to publish; I want to write my weird little stories and have people read them.  I don’t even care if it’s just my friends and I only sell, like, three copies of anything.  I have long since resigned myself to never being a full-time writer, so while extra cash would be nice, it’s not something I desperately need.  (That said, I am going to be selling my work because it’s work, so.  But I have thoughts about discount codes and freebies, so we’ll see how it goes.)  I’d like to be able to hire an editor, commission covers, that kind of thing, though, so I’m also thinking about starting a Patreon to help fund those aspects of it, with rewards and all that good stuff.

So I can publish the novellas and short story collections, and if the publisher passes on my manuscript, I can publish the Teachout book and start writing the second one.

This is the scary part, though.  Am I too scattered to make something like this work?  What if no one has any interest? What about pirates (both cyber and sailor)?  Will I annoy people with self-promo?  Will people in my circle think less of me?  (Do I care about the people who would think less of me for doing this?) How will this affect my other writing?  OH GOD HOW DOES THIS AFFECT MY TAXES?!

I think I can do it.  I might ask y’all for cheerleading here and there.  I have a planner and Mr. Seldnei.

Every time I think about it and get scared, I think second Teachout book no matter what happens and I’m like … yeah. Yeah, I think I need to at least try.

So, goals for 2024:

FUCKIT subs

finish this baseball thing

Podcast

Patreon (?)

Self-publishing

AAAAAAAAAAA.

[aelaer]

“Nobody asked about my writing” meme

Thanks for the tag, @tea-understands :) Thankfully I have a small handful of folks who ask me about such things but I do love these memes.

 1: what are you currently working on? 

The Big Boy Fic! The finale of Earth-197320, which I'm 99% certain I am calling Above the Shadows. And I'll have a fun update on Write Every Day June in a couple days.

2: summarize your current project 

It's the fifth and final fic in a series that I started 4 years ago from an anonymous prompt sent to @amethyst-noir. I really clicked with it and she gave me her blessing to pursue it as a full-fledged fic, and here we are today.

Here's my first stab at a proper summary that I wrote for this questionnaire (tell me what you think y'all??):

2019 starts off in crisis-mode as rifts within the borders of reality begin spiraling out of control, drawing the resources of the Masters of the Mystic Arts thin. Tony now juggles the problems of a suddenly-absent Stephen, keeping his work with the sorcerers a secret, and Pepper's uncertain future. Stephen does what he can to maintain the stability of reality while keeping the promises he made. And somewhere out there, the other Stephen Strange is still hiding, putting his own plans into play.

3: summarize your current project poorly 

An author split up what should have been a single work into five separate stories because she wanted to fulfill Bingo cards in 2019, leading to a series that the readers are probably going to need to reread because there's so much detail in Fic 5 that calls back to stuff that happened in Fics 1-4. Fics 1-3 match the length of Fic 4, and Fic 5 is well over the length of Fics 1-4 combined, making for even poorer fic splitting choices. Whoops.

4: describe your favorite character or characters

I mean. Do I really need to? If you're on my blog you know who my faves are.

I guess quick summary as they are in the series in particular:

Stephen Strange: Has an enormous guilt complex that he's been working through a lot. He got better with the help of new friends. His work has endeared them to him quite a bit.

Wong: Has taken a leadership role, but not the title of Sorcerer Supreme for reasons not yet established to the readers. Carries his own secrets. Excellent poker face, but not emotionless.

Tony Stark: Has been blatantly ignoring the Accords ever since he went against Ross's back to find Steve in Siberia and has been continuing that trend since. Seeing the feds turn their eyes on Peter changed his opinion quite strongly. The Steve Issue is still difficult.

Other Strange: He thinks the Avengers and Masters of the Mystic Arts have failed their duties and that he can protect all of reality by himself. He just needs more power.

5: post a line from your current project without any context 

Closed my eyes and scrolled and went to a random page. This is what came up.

Oh, Jesus Christ. This explained so much about the man.

6: how do you get through writers block?

If it's not something health-related which just makes it physically very hard to work on items, I'll switch projects with my shorter fics. For a long fic like this, I'll put on a sprint and just power through 15 minutes at a time to get the harder bits out.

For health-related stuff (including mental), you sometimes just need to work on that first before you can be in the right space to write.

7: would you want to live in the world of your current work? 

Hell no. Superhero worlds are terrible for normal people.

8: briefly discuss your outlining process, if you outline 

I write an outline with the main beats of what I want in that chapter. Then when I get to the actual chapter, I'll sometimes expand the outline with more detail in that chapter section itself. I often go back to the main outline and add new things as I come up with them, or switch around elements in the story to a new chapter. This is how the planned outline has grown from around 12 normal chapters and 1 interlude chapter to 18 normal chapters and 2 interlude chapters (with potential for more growth seeing as I'm getting into some areas that have original outlining that I no longer am certain I want to use as they were ideas from over 2 years ago and the story's evolved a lot since then).

9: what is the aesthetic of your current project?

So much plot. Rewriting a lot of the end of phase 3 to push my Found Family agenda. Fix it vibes, but I think it's a natural fix it arc from the canon drama that could have happened in canon if the Russos gave a damn. A lot of character exploration into their own separate journeys and growth arcs. Pretty accurate on Marvel tones with action, drama, a bit of snark and humor. An itty bitty dash of canon romance but we all know I'm including it only because it needs to be there due to the plot and character arc reasons and not because I'm all googly-eyed for the genre.

10: what song sums up your current work the best?

Each chapter in the series takes a song lyric from a specific song and I identify that song with the story pretty heavily. For instance, Illuminating the Shadows took "The Light" from Disturbed.

For Above the Shadows, it's "Phoenix" by Fall Out Boy (who I'm seeing live in concert in a couple days, yay).

Tagging those who I know are writing/trying to write: @mckiwi, @sobeautifullyobsessed, @burglarhobbit, @amethyst-noir. No obligation either way. Also if I didn't tag you please feel free to take this (and you can poke me here if you'd like as a reminder that you're still actively writing fic regardless of the fandom and I'll try to remember for these sorts of things).

[mermaidsirennikita]

Found your blog via the sanditon tag and I couldn't agree more. This season is just so effin boring for the main couple. Like. First time I don't care about an Austen hero? Like going from Theo to this random dude is such a downgrade. Brooding awkward average looking man doesn't feel like the romance hero I'd root for. Arthur's, Lady Susan's and Georgiana's storylines are much more interesting than anything Charlotte has had this season. I wish they would have at least given her Slater after Sidney left.

The thing is... and it's totally fine for people to enjoy the show after Sidney died, I just didn't (and not simply because Theo left, though I'll admit I kind of thought it would be a situation where they would clumsily make up for his departure, and... I was right lol)...

The show was always meant to be an Austen fanfic. What she wrote of Sanditon is not a "final draft", and it's not even close to being finished. It's not a full skeleton of a novel. I never expected for it to play like true Austen, because it's not, and that's fine.

Where you got more complicated, and where the show got to the point that it's just a lame horse and it's better off being put out of its misery, is that it was an Austen fanfic that then lost one of the only solid Austen bones it had, lol. And a really important bone (... his bone could've been so vital to the story). And because Austen heroes *do not die*, there had to be this sort of narrative reshuffle of "well ackshully, what we saw was sort of a prequel, her tragic backstory as a heroine", except the guy who's coming in is not a Jane Austen piece at all, he's the writer's own piece. It became this Frankenwork.

And it was... extremely boring. I saw people responding to my post saying that I didn't like the show because I didn't identify with Charlotte "as written"; I don't need to identify with a character in order to like her, but I do need to be entertained by her. While I pithily said I don't like romances with kids and her arc seems like a nightmare to me... Which is true.... I can and have been persuaded to like stories similar to Charlotte's.

Where you lose me is when I think of the girl who was excited to get off a boring farm where she helped take care of a million siblings, going to a town where she saw things that ~shocked her~ (the moment that got me to watch the show was Charlotte having her entire Awakening in 30 seconds when she saw Sidney in the ocean; the fear of her own feelings mixed with curiosity and being overwhelmed was so real) and helped Georgiana defy this overbearing man... When I say I didn't get "let me be a teacher and raise this dude's kids" (which, cool, she's working, but she is working with KIDS, the entire sum of her life is about KIDS, after she came from a farm where much of her responsibilities were about KIDS, the dynamic evolution didn't exist) as being something Charlotte would want as this young woman, that's what I'm talking about. Doesn't mean she wouldn't have kids! It just means that I thought the show's original goal was to give us more of the girl who ran off to the city and just traipsed into a brothel and gave Sidney an entire heart attack. A girl who seemed bold and reckless and a bit zany.

In what I saw of the Charlotte of subsequent seasons (which was not everything because my time is limited and I'm not going to waste it on a show I don't enjoy) was not that. And I didn't really care for this subdued version that never would have existed had Theo James decided to stick around.

And I'll be honest--if they'd come in with a dynamic romantic hero, I would've come back. At its heart, Sanditon did play like a romance, and I think that having a good romantic hero was so important for its vibe, its success. The guy they brought in was very dull for me as a viewer; the life he offered was not a romantic fantasy. It was a bit of a male fantasy--hey, the wife (who I believe shit was kinda complicated with anyway) is gone, and now you get a plucky hot governess who's gonna help you with your kids and bounce on it for the rest of your life when she's not saving the children. But the setup they were giving in season one felt more like the feminine fantasy--he's hot but he's kind of an ass and but he chills out for meee. Not saying either fantasy is particularly romantic! But it felt very much like the original goal was giving Charlotte something, whereas the next was giving the GUY something.

I'm guessing you got autocorrected to Slater from Stringer lol, and tbh, I disliked Stringer in season 1, but Leo Suter has gone on to really impress me (both as an actor and in simple leading man ways) in Vikings. I think there could've been a path where you had Stringer get an edge and come back as this successful dude with a chip on his shoulder who's not so *eager* to have Charlotte in season 2. Someone she'd have to reevaluate, as I never bought her being genuinely into him in season 1. It could've had Persuasion vibes, but with perhaps an edge.

Again, it's whatever, I'm happy for people who liked the show. To me, it was just a letdown and it felt like Charlotte's character was changed to fit the new guy they introduced. Not interested in debating that; but I don't see s1 Charlotte and s2/3 Charlotte as the same person. Not because Sidney died--because she was changed to fit an unplanned storyline.

[phantomato]

2022 Year-End

rules:

post the top 5 works you're most proud of that you released in 2022 (not necessarily your most popular),

your top 4 current WIPs that you're excited to release in the new year,

your top 3 biggest improvements in your writing over the past year,

your top 2 resolutions (ways you wish to improve your writing/blog) for the new year,

and your number 1 favorite line you've written this year.

Thanks for the tag, @duplicitywrites! @yletylyf, do this with me. 💖

Five works

His Hair, Full of Blooms Tom Jr./Tom Sr.

I was terrified to write this and more terrified not to. Some of my best prose.

Proximity Tom/Aberforth

My new ship tag of the year. Abe snuck into my heart in how he connected to Tom, and I’ll always see them as friends, going forward.

Self-Worship Voldemort self-cest

I think the pining and the language came out beautifully in this.

Sieidi Voldemort/Nott Sr.

This was a light year for Nottmort, and when I returned to it after six months off, I wrote the type of romance that is closest to my heart. It was extremely disappointing to publish, but I am glad that I wrote it.

Widow’s Weeds Walburga/Minerva

I wanted to write this for an entire year before I got around to it. Walburga Black is one of my favorite characters in HP and a font of grief, which is where I’m happiest working.

Four WIPS

I’m not great at maintaining multiple WIPs. Stretching the definitions a bit for this…

Decline pt. 2 - Nottmort, a new chapter for a story I’d meant to be finished

“Why have you come to see me?”

“I missed you,” Voldemort answered, simply, because it was the truth.

“Is that a new state of being?”

“No,” he admitted. “But I have missed you, and I wanted to see you.” He wanted more than to see Thoros. Backlit slightly by soft afternoon sunlight, Thoros’ mid-brown hair glowed bronze at the edges. Voldemort wanted badly to reach over the desk and join their hands, just to hold them; he wanted to pull Thoros to that ridiculous leather sofa—who ever sat in it, anyway?—and kiss him a little, then a lot. They could stop there, even if Voldemort would inevitably want more, if only he could hold Thoros’ face in his hands and kiss him until the sun went down and rose again.

MDN - I can’t reveal too much about this until after the exchange is over, but boy golly does it haunt my thoughts.

George laughed. His pale chest heaved with it, straining up towards me with each of his delighted breaths. I could see what the other men could not—for all of the frippery and lace trimming the neck of his bodice, suggesting a girlish bosom, he was completely flat. The low, square neckline cut across his skin, pressing in just enough to imply soft flesh which was absent. His chest served as no more than a place to rest one’s palm, if one did not mind that it would be empty.

RS - Nottmort with many side friendships, though it likely needs a plot to bear its projected weight. Whether this happens is up in the air.

“I’m contemplating a career change,” you tell Horace, understating enough for this century and the next. “I’ve recently found that my priorities in life have shifted, and I’m at a loss of… precisely what to do with myself. I have the luxury of time to consider my choice,” so long as you’re careful with money and you can gracefully exit yourself from the whole Death-Eating business, “but I’m not sure where to start.”

You breathe in. You’ve admitted to uncertainty. You breathe out. The world has not collapsed around you.

Horace pats his chest pocket for something to do, and then the tea is done steeping, so he takes a minute to fill your cups, to dose yours with a bit of milk and as much sugar as you’re comfortable asking. “Well, Tom,” he says, “I’m afraid that I don’t know how to characterize your current line of work. That does impede the sort of advice I can provide.” He’s very good at not tripping over his own words, and his mustache trembles only a bit, over ‘work.’ Poor Horace.

AC - Another gift fic. My consumption of English public school media is at an all-time high.

“Hand-delivery for you, only I didn’t think you’d want to actually touch the likes of me.” Guy tilted his head to look down; there was a distinct satisfaction in being taller than Fowler, for moments like these, when he was mostly certain Fowler wouldn’t be brutish enough to hit him. “Or perhaps you would enjoy it, if it were your cane.”

Three Improvements

I’ve improved my descriptions of setting and character. No more blank white rooms for me.

I think my period pastiche is getting pretty darn good.

Curating my fandom spaces. This one is a continual effort, but I am working to value my own happiness more.

Two Resolutions

Work on plotting. I’m not a plot-driven writer, but I would like to have the tool in my toolkit—right now, plots are a fluke rather than an intentional choice. I could do more here, and I think practicing with something like e.g. casefic would give me more options. Or, if I truly hate it, at least I’ve faced that head-on.

Use more metaphors. To go alongside the description improvement, above: fine-tune when a metaphor would be better than a physical description, and then create them.

One Line

I don’t think of my writing in terms of singular lines. If I did, I might have better summaries.

[opinated-user]

I heard in this blog that lily is aphobic, Could I see how? since she's now mention sex repulsed people and asexuals in her anti kink discourses

if you had read this blog then you'd know why already, but assuming this is still being asked in good faith. off the top of my head: -disrespecting canon ace/aro characters. Elethyn is an ace character that Lizzy made and LO comissioned to have SA by dogs behind Lizzy's back. she ships Lilith from the toh with Hooty, a bird like demon creature. see a pattern of her putting these ace women in sexual situations with non human creatures? -for years she didn't tag her nsfw content until she was nagged enough to do it. for years she has openly spoken about her sex life, her sexual practices and kinks without any warning. three times this woman was stripped on youtube without a proper warning. even after supposedly getting over her kinks because of the miraculous work of her supposed therapist, she still talks incredibly gross and vomiting inducing sexual jokes involving underage characters. this is the same person who said she wanted her brownfacing avatar to be sexualized while she talks about cartoons for children. this is not a woman that has ever cared about people uncomfortable with sex or didn't consent to be a witness to it. -the only ace character in pokemadhouse that doesn't represent a real person is G. G, the character that has been call out countless times for taking advantage of a sleeping child as a full grown adult, a pedophile in fact, only to later keep chasing that child into adulthood to reciprocate her romantic feelings despite being turned down multiple times. LO wrote this pedophilic groomer and then, to try to downplay it, said this same character was an sex repulsed asexual all along as if that it's meant to make the grooming and pedophilia any better. do i need to explain how terrible that is? -the fiasco romancegate. LO attempted to scam her audience into doing free labor for her as usual, asking for a very specific kind of story she could have commissioned if she wanted to, without any mention of an actual prize. when people started questioning what were exactly her expectations, it quickly became apparent that LO was only interested on a very specific kind of identities to be represented. not non binary women, not trans women and definitely not ace or aro women. she made people with these identities feel like they weren't good enough and she has never owned up to it. -the only times she even talks about ace/aro characters is to say that representation isn't good enough... without ever bringing up "good" ace/aro characters as any alternative, either because she actually doesn't know or doesn't care. in any case... why does she even think she has any authority to define for ace/aro people what is good representation for them? -(allegedly, i wasn't there for this so take it with a grain of salt) she went to stream to claim that another youtuber was lying about being LGBT, despite never claiming as such, and about only ever feeling attraction towards his wife because, quote, "everyone wants to fuck."

i'm sure there are more examples someone else can bring up, but these are the one i can immediately remember.

[daja-the-hypnokitten]

Jukebox reviews part 14! For context, see my post “A Project”   under  this same tag. If you want to see a full list of his EMCSA   stories,  they can be found here, sorted alphabetically.And if you want to see some of his drabbles, check out his blog at @jukeboxemcsa  

 Sharp Dressed Man

 date uploaded   date updated     Tags

4/10/2010                                     mc mf md

Trust someone in marketing to care more about the presentation of something than the content. And, as a scientist, I do resent the way Nina just acts as though scientists don't know how to dress. Just because I get to wear street clothes to the lab (look, you don't want synthetic fabrics around chemicals. You just don't. Cotton all the way, folks! Or linen or wool, depending) doesn't mean I don't know how to dress up and look stunning when I want to. Or, at least, my partners have used stunning to describe me, but I suppose they may just be biased. REGARDLESS, Nina's being a bit catty here, and that definitely makes me feel like she deserves what she gets. But the control isn't ... it isn't a style I enjoy in my kink stories, so on a lot of levels this is just a miss for me. If you like someone being overwhelmed with ... well, ok, in this universe it's science but no, that isn’t how any of this works, so it's magic. You might just enjoy this. 3/10 spirals.

Show Don’t Tell

 date uploaded   date updated     Tags

4/17/2010                                     mc ff cb

Given who Adventure Girl makes me think of, it's WEEIRD to see her juxtaposed with Venus Ascendant, given who Venus makes me think of. (Look, her age says Supergirl, but her origin says Ms. Marvel. And I'm a Carol Danvers fan.) But holding that aside, because it isn't really important, gosh this is a Good Story. The Girdle of Minerva works so well, and watching Adventure Girl grapple with the same sorts of "but good girls don't!" that I too had to unlearn is ... cathartic? Kind of? It doesn't hit my hot buttons exactly - too much magic, which if y'all have been following my reviews won't come as a surprise - but it's still really good. 7/10 spirals

  Closer to the Heart

 date uploaded   date updated     Tags

4/25/2010                                     mc mf fd

How can I even *start* to review this one? This isn't just my favourite Jukebox story - my favourite story on the EMCSA *other* than one my spouse wrote for and dedicated to me! - but it was FORMATIVE to my hypnokink, to my sense of what I might possibly *find* in a relationship. I didn't know what healthy, happy romantic relationships looked like when I was as young as I was when I read this story, back when it was first posted. Not *really.* My parents were always so very private about their relationship, and I knew enough to know that media wasn't ... it just wasn't. Add in the "I'm not really interested in sex itself" with the strong hypnokink, and I was so adrift. Sure, there were, like, 2 book series I read that had Healthy Relationships, but they didn't have any of the kink nuance, so that didn't help.But this story. This story has so many moments that I read and my brain went "that. I want *THAT.*" The mix of romance and fun kinky things in this story became my measuring stick for relationships I was in, and if I realized that a partner wasn't living up to that? That they weren't showing me the respect Lynn shows Michael? I was done. And I needed that, more than once, unfortunately. But it also helped me internalize that I *could* have that kind of relationship. And now I do - 4 times over! I've mentioned before on my blog how a line from this story became a guiding benchmark for me, the idea of "everything we do comes from love." Whether love of community, love of a friend, or romantic love, that central tenant has helped me know when to stop doing something I was no longer doing for the right reasons, and to grow into an adult who knows when to - and how to! - say no.That's a LOT to put into a story, I realize, and it isn't just this story that did it. But it was absolutely a catalyst for so much of that. I would not be who I am today if it weren't for this story. I probably wouldn't have even felt like I belonged in this community without this story, and a few others (one by Jukebox, and a couple by Wiseguy).So all that said, let's get into the actual text of the story, shall we?

While we start with sexual stuff immediately, it's also instantly clearly part of the conditioning/brainwashing process, so that's all good by my standards. There's such obvious love and connection between Michael and Lynn, and she so gently and tenderly reinforcing her control as she moves through the chakras. And then, when we get to the heart chakra, and Michael stops being passive because he loves Lynn so much, and has such a need to communicate that to her... it melts my heart. The way she drops out of pet names and just uses his name in that moment, the mantra... so much good here. And then the moment where we see Michael is so aware of how much Lynn loves him in return is so tender... to me, that's the true climax of this story, the sharing in love that has been well tended and grown by *both* of them. It's just tender and sweet and lovely and I am so very fond of both Michael and Lynn, here and in every story we see with them. 9001/10 spirals.

Already Gone

 date uploaded   date updated     Tags

5/2/2010                                       mc ff

There's a really interesting suggestion in here, and it's one I definitely plan to use for (short-term) shenanigans with a partner at some point. The idea of them being consumed by curiosity, focusing entirely on a fixation object as it sucks their thoughts away? Oh yes, I'm using that. The rest of this story? It's good enough, but doesn't quite get me invested the way other stories have and do. Some of that is the contrast to Closer to the Heart, of course; I remember 12 years ago, reading this one the week after Closer to the Heart and wishing that this had been closer to that - and I still do. But this one stands well on its own, if I make myself stop comparing it to Closer to the Heart. Seeing how Cat's mind changes in response to the control is *delightful,* and it's well thought out. It's just a bit impersonal for me, is all. 8/10 spirals.

  I Ran So Far Away

 date uploaded   date updated     Tags

5/8/2010                                       mc mf md

Hmm, another one of those stories that never quite feels erotic - surreal horror, maybe? Still really good for what it is, just a bit ... not quite fitting amongst the rest of the stories on the archive. But it's well written, we really, TRULY get a sense of what Monica was running from and why she's scared, and it fits so very well. Though I have to wonder how nobody's noticed this before now. Surely enough folk gathered by those who serve would have people who miss them! 7/10 spirals

  Zombie

 date uploaded   date updated     Tags

5/15/2010                                     mc mf md

I feel bad for Addison here; he's mostly an innocent bystander in this one. Wouldn't it have made more sense to just tell him to forget the secrets involved and only have to worry about one person - a seemingly not well-liked one! - disappearing? Ah well, leaving my opinions on what makes sense aside, this is a bit ... clinical? which is the point, of course, but it makes it hard for me to see it as erotic, personally. But the method works, and I enjoy the (entirely too brief) description of the experience Addison has. If you like more detatched/clinical control, you'll likely enjoy this one? 6/10 spirals

  Talking In Your Sleep

 date uploaded   date updated     Tags

5/22/2010                                     mc ff

This ends the only way it possibly could, and I don't think that's inherently a bad thing? Because the *how* we end up where it ends up is a bigger draw than the "where is this going?" sentiment would be. It's fun to watch how Alicia slowly brainwashes herself with Holly's voice, though I can't help but shake my head at her not realising she was doing that. Ah well, hopefully it will work out for the best and they can be a happy trio; I've seen well how two subby gals can be in love and reinforcing their submission to a shared dominant partner; it can be *super* cute. Though that does involve more consenting submsision, but what can you do, I suppose? I do have to wonder just how much actual rest Holly was getting, but it seemed to work for her? 8/10 spirals

  You’re the Inspiration

 date uploaded   date updated     Tags

5/30/2010                                     mc

Another of the inductions Jukebox has written, and one very not to my taste; a central image of it is, effectively, serial recruitment, which is a hard limit for me. So it's not an induction I can rate well, though the technique is as solid as always.

  Common People

 date uploaded   date updated     Tags

6/5/2010                                       mc mf md fd

I feel like the last part of this sort of skews away from what would be - to me! - a much more interesting story. But it ends up more or less exactly where I expected it to - after 139 stories, I think I'm getting a sense of where Jukebox is going with these pretty quickly from the tone. The first two thirds of the story is good - the approach of a telepath who's trying not to give into her powers is fun! But the cruel ending to it, caused by another telepath, is less my vibe. 6/10 spirals.

  Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap

 date uploaded   date updated     Tags

6/12/2010                                     mc ff

Honestly, do people not understand the idea of too good to be true? I suppose there would be fewer good stories if they did, and after all it can be hard to resist temptation. And to be fair, Isabelle did speak truly, for all she left significant details out. It's a fun story, and the sense of how Sylvia is overwhelmed and conditioned and brainwashed is wonderful. Having said that, I don't actually like the light and sound machines - unless I'm already SUPER fractionated, they just give me a wicked headache (I should know, I experimented with them once upon a time, thanks to Wiseguy) - so I do wince a little at the idea of waking from sleep right into one. But that's a me thing - plenty of folk really like light and sound machines, and I know from friends' testimonies that they can be amazingly hypnotic for a lot of folk! So that just makes all of this feel more real, and more personal. It's just all around a good story that hits a lot of things I like. 9/10 spirals.

[fountainpenguin]

Hi, Minor Blog & Fic Updates

If you don't want to read this today, consider checking out my pinned post when you can, and/or just read the ScarletPenguin section at bottom for transparency

---

📌 Made a minor update to my pinned post; I removed the spreadsheet link since my buffer's running low and it'll be one less thing to worry about while I play catch-up. Also added a permanent ask game, mostly to give visitors / new followers a way to break the ice if they want to. I'll also add a link to this post to the pinned one.

🦷 I've moved my one Coco 'fic (That 4k contest entry I wrote September 2018) to the Anonymous collection. If you would still like the AO3 link, it's here (River Teeth). It's also currently available on my FFN.

🐶 Dog's Life Chapter 9 goes up on Tuesday, then Chapter 10 goes up on October 3rd. That's the last chapter of Session 1 and the 'fic will be on hiatus while I build the Session 2 buffer.

🎃 I expect to post a lot of short pieces in October; I'm giving myself a (tentative) monthly challenge so I can get rid of a bunch of WIPs without holding onto them for a year. Not committing to a full 31 days, but I've got a lot of little things that don't need to be masterpieces, so it should be a busy month. I'll probably do one announcement post each Friday instead of individual story announcements. Still very much playing this by ear and I might get busy IRL, but expect at least a few things.

I had a plan to post something Anti-Fairy related for Friday the 13th in October, but it's not playing nice with me so we'll see.

✍️ After October, I need to spend time rebuilding my 'fic buffers. I'd also like to update my table of contents tab and possibly the sideblog. In other words, expect a busy October for 'fic updates. November will probably be Traffic Season 5 drabbles and stuff (I'm guessing), and then we'll start winding down on 'fics during December and January. I'll probably post again in Feb or March; not sure yet.

🐾 A ton of Session 1 stuff I wrote for Dog's Life got bumped to Session 2 for pacing reasons, so I already have a lot done; I might start posting Session 2 as early as mid-November or early December, but stuff for Origin and Knots definitely needs polishing and will take longer. Not sure yet.

---

❤️ 2 months ago, I made a post talking about my ScarletPenguin pseud. That's the pseud where I keep any M works, and I wanted to explain how this works to people who may be unfamiliar (as I have a piece I'm working on that I'll probably post as M).

The majority of my content is Gen or T, so I'm using the pseud to keep my M stuff in a separate place [i.e. not immediately visible to people browsing my main page, because I mostly do children's show fanfics that ARE Gen and T, and I just feel better doing it like this].

In other words, if you would like to scroll through my works but would prefer not to run across anything M, THIS is the link that only has Gen and T stuff [It's the FountainPenguin pseud link; you can also access it by clicking on my username on any of my AO3 works]. You will not see M 'fics if you use this link :)

I have not yet decided if I'm going to do announcement posts for M stories. If I do, the posts will be tagged #ScarletPenguin, so I recommend blocking that tag now if you would like to.

If you would like to find any M works after they're posted, you can access them by going to FountainPenguin's Profile -> Pseuds -> ScarletPenguin (left sidebar on desktop).

If you are subscribed to me on AO3, I'm pretty sure you'll get an email when any new stuff is posted. If you do not want to subscribe to me as a user, consider subscribing only to the 'fics you like or even to a series (ex: all the 130 Prompts are in the 130 Station series and you can get email notifs that way even though all those stories are posted individually).

I'm trying to post 130 Prompts in the 130 Station series before any others because I suspect that only the first series counts for the email alerts (Not sure). However, you can also subscribe to the individual trains if you like (Blue Train, for example, only contains Anti-Fairy content so maybe you're into that, etc.) I'm just not sure if you'll get an email since if you want to put a work in more than one series, you have to post the story and then edit it, and I'm not sure if that sends a notification.

I also don't know if you can have a series with two pseuds in it, or how that will affects the tag visibility on the series page. We'll see.

tl;dr - I feel good about having done my part to make this news accessible, create a blog tag for it just in case, and this info will be added to my pinned post when I wake up [This is in the queue]. Stay safe, safe comfy!

Thanks!

[radiowrites]

I posted 2,064 times in 2022

14 posts created (1%)

2,050 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@goneahead

@talesofsorrowandofruin

@distance-does-not-matter

@smittenbypoetry

@writerscreed

I tagged 2,057 of my posts in 2022

#writing - 1,290 posts

#lmao - 473 posts

#art - 211 posts

#fanfiction - 206 posts

#ghost hunt - 122 posts

#eye candy - 104 posts

#kpop - 85 posts

#fanart - 83 posts

#fma - 40 posts

#music - 35 posts

Longest Tag: 114 characters

#yeah i’ve learned if i want english language fanfic for a korean drama i’m probably going to have to write it haha

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Ten Random Lines

Rules: Pick any ten of your fics, scroll to the midpoint, pick a line (or three) and share it. Then tag ten people.

I was tagged by @radio-chatter! Thanks so much. This one looks fun!

Tagging: @writercorianarose @thedemoninthecorner @dreams-of-kalopsia @shesailsships @eyeliner-vampire @alonelyturtle @goneahead @csakuras and anyone else with fanfics they want to play this game with!

Ah, nothing like finding an error in a years old fic when doing a tag game...

Anyway, on to the lines. I jumped all around with the ages of the fics, and tried to do so with the fandoms, but if you are familiar with my works, you know that Ghost Hunt will dominate the list.

House of Memories / Fandom: Memorist (k-drama)

We’re not that close, she had told him, even if it had been slightly in jest. She had no right to watch over his restless slumber.

2. Day One / Fandom: Ghost Hunt (manga)

Only Mai could recognize the slight hitch of emotion in his voice.

3. Fix Me / Fandom: Ghost Hunt (manga)

“What do I need to do? Give over some blood, recite some spells?”

4. Unchained Melody / Fandom: Tale of the Nine Tailed (k-drama)

The moment broke when the music on her phone changed to something harsh and jarring.

5. The Last of the Real Ones / Fandom: Ghost Hunt (manga)

Luella told Eugene she believed him, of course. Mainly because she knew Oliver wouldn’t mess up his room for a prank. But no, she had not felt it.

6. Rebel Just For Kicks / Fandom: Final Fantasy XV (game)

Noctis pulled the truck to the side and went around the car. Ignis could see the fear-stricken faces of the passengers within.

7. A Noble Vow / Fandom: Pandora Hearts (manga)

She didn’t want to fall into another stupor and risk saying something stupid again.

8. Lost in the Echo / Fandom: Ghost Hunt (manga)

He dropped her off about a block from her home, and they never saw each other again.

See the full post

8 notes - Posted December 11, 2022

#4

2021 Fic in Review

Tagged by @radio-chatter! Thank you! ^^

Hi, I’m RaisedonRadio & FortressofmyPast on AO3 and FF.net. This is a tradition going on for years! Check out my prior year end posts: 2020, 2019, 2018, 2017, 2016, 2015.

Total Number Of Completed Works: 2

Total Word Count: 4729

Fandoms I’ve Written In: Ghost Hunt (Japanese anime/manga), Memorist (Korean drama).

Looking Back, Did You Write More Fic Than You Thought You Would This Year, Less, Or About What You’d Expected?

Less. This past week I had hoped to finish another WIP, but instead I took the time to digitize a bunch of writing that had been trapped in notebooks. It was actually a lot of fun, there were so many stories I had forgotten about. But, do you know what this means? I ADDED SO MANY WIPs. -_-;; XD

What’s Your Own Favorite Story Of The Year?

I like them both for vastly different reasons.

Did You Take Any Writing Risks This Year?

I wrote for a fandom that only had two other fics in it - one in a language I don’t speak and one a crossover. It was fun because I had to know I was going into it with no anticipation of reader interaction. Truly had to write it because I wanted to.

Do You Have Any Fanfic Or Profic Goals For The New Year?

I’d definitely like to write more. Finish a few of these WIPs hanging around.

Most Popular Story Of The Year?

It’s not right to pit these two fics against each other, they are for very different fandoms, and I literally published the one on December 27th, so…

But I do like to compare the stats for AO3 and FF.net: Call You Mine had 6 reviews/29 favs on FF.net, and 6 comments/34 kudos/9 bookmarks on AO3. That’s a big deal, in the past years Ghost Hunt fics would get much more interaction on FF.net, now AO3 is breaking even.

Story Of Mine Most Under-Appreciated By The Universe, In My Opinion:

I appreciate every comment, kudo, and fav. I know I say this every year, but it’s true. I write for relatively small fandoms and whenever a reader takes the time to say hi, my heart glows.

Most Fun Story To Write:

Call You Mine. I went into it with the desire to make something incredibly fluffy as a birthday gift and I think I succeeded.

See the full post

10 notes - Posted December 31, 2021

#3

First Lines Tag

Thanks for the tag, @talesofsorrowandofruin!

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all). See if there are any patterns. Choose your favorite opening line, then tag some of your fellow authors!

I did a similar game to this a long time ago! It’ll be interesting to see if my opening style has changed any.

These are all fanfictions that can be found on my AO3. They were written from 2021 to 2017 are listed starting with the newest.

Some observations I found:

16 of the 20 are under 15 words long.

1 out of the 20 is in first person (but 3 of them could be, if just from the opening line.)

17 of the 20 introduce a character by name.

3 of the 20 open with dialogue.

My favorite? Probably from Rebel Just for Kicks.

Tagging!

@writercorianarose @thedemoninthecorner @dreams-of-kalopsia @radio-chatter @csakuras @scribblesandsorcery and anyone else that has first lines they want to share! Tag me!

1.

At first, Seon Mi didn’t give the last words of Jin Jae Gyu any weight.

- House of Memories, Memorist

2.

It was the weekend.

- Call You Mine, Ghost Hunt

3.

Masako Hara paused at the street corner.

- Waste It On Me, Ghost Hunt

See the full post

12 notes - Posted January 21, 2022

#2

I think I made like one post about Nanowrimo this month, but just wanted to say whoa! I hit 50k words! I had no idea what to expect going in when I had decided to start barely two weeks before November.

I definitely challenged my perfectionism when it comes to writing first drafts and just getting the words down, and that was my goal.

I’m ready to leave these characters alone for a bit and go dust off a few fanfictions starting in December, ha!

13 notes - Posted November 28, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💖

Oh interesting, I've never done this before!

Since 31 of my 45 fics are from the manga/anime Ghost Hunt, that's going to dominate the list, but I'll stick in one different fandom just to prove I do write occasionally for others!

Hello everyone, I am RaisedonRadio & FortressofmyPast on AO3 and FF.net. Here is five of my favorite works by yours truly.

Lin's List

A list of 25 things for Lin to refrain from - and keep Oliver from doing - during their stay in Japan. As suggested by Madoka Mori.

A humorous little oneshot under 1000 words. An oldie that has aged well.

The Last of the Real Ones

Being determined to expose them all as frauds might mean losing a piece of himself along the way.

I will admit, I am a oneshot writer. So here is one of like, two chaptered works in my portfolio (not including oneshot collections).

A piece that focuses on a young Oliver when his paranormal skills start to take over his life.

Same Old Lang Syne

Should old acquaintances be forgotten, and never brought to mind?

A post-series look at if the gang drifted apart. Yes, it's based after the Dan Fogelberg song.

Lost in the Echo

Can you call it a reunion if you’ve never met before?

A look into one of Ghost Hunt's biggest mysteries - the death of Eugene Davis.

And the honorary mention fandom, for a kdrama titled Tale of the Nine Tailed:

Unchained Melody

He’s teaching her to drive, why can’t he teach her to dance, too?

I don't normally fall for non canon couples, but I fell hard for Rang and Yu Ri.

Thanks for reading!

14 notes - Posted May 22, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[leafflets]

Hello!! My name is Vincent, though I answer to a bunch of other names like Glen, Sycamore, and Forest. I'm 23 and primarily use hymn/they pronouns. My timezone is EST. I follow from my main, @salsotto .

I've been writing for 10+ years, my first story being a short little thing I wrote when I was about 9. (It was about vampires and werewolves. I read it to my class.) I enjoy writing about mystery, murder, vampires, hot gay (vampire) men, old-timey settings, and more. While my motivation (and writing ability) varies greatly from day to day, I do enjoy it, and I'd love to be able to tell at least one great, captivating story one day.

Other than writing I enjoy games like Genshin Impact, Hades, Limbus Company, and more. I watch anime and read manga. I also draw and you'll probably see art I've done of my ocs around here eventually~

(As an additional note, I'm AuDHD + OCD/OCPD and this... affects my writing ability greatly most days. Oops!)

You can also check out my fanfiction blog @thescarleteyes . (18+/NSFW Warning LOL)

I'm constantly stuck in wip hell. Most of them I haven't actually started, because my ADHD doesn't let me hyperfocus on them. Why focus on your stories when you can hyperfocus on a game and stay up till 10am? That being said, I have 3 main ones I'm focusing on, as well as 3 that are on an indefinite hiatus (due to being stories I wrote in middle and high school...) They are as follows:

"Trained Mystery" - One quiet day, an English professor receives a hand-penned letter telling him they'll tell him answers to things he's never known about himself if he boards a renowned, luxurious steam train; but when someone aboard the train is killed, he's thrust into the role of having to solve the mystery before him - one that's not himself.

Journal of a Fallen Angel - A once-illustrious angel tells the stories of the lives of humans he finds intriguing, no matter what the cost to study them may be.

Penned in Claret - Stuck in a spot where his job is at stake, an overworked journalist Ronan Harwick tries to find himself the juiciest next scoop to save his job; but when he tracks down a hot guy from the bar for a story, he finds his life on the line in a world he only ever saw in his dreams.

A Tale Once Told - Ifnie Dracon, a shadow demon, has been tasked to watch over a teenager named Rynn. Not knowing what he's in for, he comes to the mortal plane once again. But after connecting with other supernatural beings like himself, they are warned of a danger that may threaten life as it is. Will him and his friends be able to ward off such a danger?

ABOUT PAGE

The Realm of Valvar - Elvanna Tiolu's father has been missing ever since she was a child. Even with people trying to get her to believe that he is dead, she has dedicated her life to training to enter the Battle and defeat the Champion - and save her father, who was last seen entering the Battle himself. Join Elvanna and her rag-tag team of "heroes" as they uncover the truth about her father and possibly - hopefully - find him alive.

ABOUT PAGE

Blood Rebellion - Hidden away in a small settlement full of people, sentient doll Lyra helps those in need as she tries to ignore her bloody past; but when her new brother stirs the pot once more, she decides to go on the hunt for revenge against the one who made her. (Originally a webcomic!)

[sentanixiv]

AO3 & Fic Questionnaire

Tagged by @emmithar-blog

How many works do you have on AO3? There are 27 posted fics associated with me and two that were co-written with another fan that I've left in their credit/name. One remains in WIP status - Down On His Luck - because I'm still writing the draft. My rule (now) is that I don't start posting a fic until I've finished the draft and/or started typing it up, so the other "WIP" ones are unofficial. And numerous.

2. What is your AO3 wordcount? 576,399 words, of which 392,723 belong to a single work

3. What fandoms do you write for? Red Dead Redemption/Red Dead Redemption 2; I fixate on specific fandoms, but have written for many others over the years.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? A Sinful Mercy - 832 Patient Obsession - 197 Endearments - 158 Beauty and the Beholder - 155 Treasures Unseen - 140

5. Do you respond to comments? Yes! Eventually! When posting ASM, my rule was to catch up on comments prior to posting the next chapter. That rule sort of holds true to this date, but with regards to needing to clear out comments before posting a new fic. However, my job is mentally exhausting and I've fallen behind to the tune of 77 comments pending a response. Imma get there, I promise!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I don't really do angsty endings; as a Hurt/Comfort specialist, the comfort usually dominates the ending. However, being that it's an in-progress fic series, Cold Coffee & Empty Coffers counts for this one.

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Presumption of Debt for shippy romantic endings; it's a very rough ending, but I wanted to outline a little bit of the good that came to the gents in it. Treasures Unseen for genfic (and the idea of Arthur sneaking two kittens into the gang).

8. Do you get hate on fics? No. I've been questioned on why I write certain themes, but no hate. Rumour is that I'm terrifying or have a terrifying reputation of punching people? C'mon, guys, it's been years since I last punched anyone's lights out.

9. Do you write smut? If so, which kind? Yeah. I'm one of them sex-positive asexuals and have my share of smut - though only a few have been posted. Vanilla ain't my thing; control, bondage themes, dom/sub undertones, and usually explicit. The Amoral Confessions stories rely more on vague references than explicit content.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest crossover you’ve ever written? Once upon a time, I crossed Weiß Kreuz with Yami no Matsuei? Generally don't do crossovers so much as AUs. I love AUs.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Uhhhhh, probably. I've had actual non-fandom writing stolen though and I went scorched earth on the perpetrator.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? I'm amenable to it, but nothing since my current penname came into effect.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yeah! I find it fun to co-write because you get multiple perspectives and possible plotlines. When I wrote professionally, I worked with a co-author on 80%+ of my projects. They tended to provide foundations and world building, I found ways to carry the story forwards and add layers to the plot.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship? Morston. The aggressive dynamic of sass and badass is my weakness; the fact that there's no damsel in distress and a lot of emotionally stunted stupidity makes it... /chef's kiss

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? My professional novel manuscripts. I lost my interest, intent, and motivation to make it professionally after a series of, well. Unfortunate events rofl.

16. What are your writing strengths? Character voices and natures that carry through the narrative, sounding like they could've been drawn from canon. Being able to write a long, convoluted plotline without dropping threads. Having an endless fountain of ideas (I have TWO boxes of just ideas on index cards and they are both full).

17. What are your writing weaknesses? What in the hell is an outline and why would I ever do one. I trust my instincts to guide me through a story. Invariably, I will end up with a tangled deadend if I try to pre-plan too much of the story. When I just let my mind and words flow, everything sorts itself out.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic Flavourful bits work out, but I think it's too onerous for the writer and reader to have to translate everything being said. Nicknames, curses, and common phrases that the character themselves used in canon are what I turn to.

19. First fandom you wrote for? Sailormoon, circa 1997. No, none of that has survived.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? A Sinful Mercy; this was the first long-form writing I'd done after the clusterfuck that saw me retire my authorial career. After years of nothing, being able to write and post that really helped my confidence. It also reminded me that writing can and should be a joy. I'm never happier than when I'm writing.

In The Moment; the first chapter highlights a lot of tension and expectation. It was my "John's back with the gang after a year away" contribution and I will never not love the way I wrote him encountering Arthur and the lead-up to the near execution.

[kaylinalexanderbooks]

ALRIGHT ARE YOU READY FOR THE RESULTS????

The lie is: "TSP used to be called The Rainbow Tunnel."

Which means only two got it right and I know that one of them is @gracehosborn who technically cheated cause she knew it already. Congrats to the other one.

The truth is, The Secret Portal has ALWAYS had that title.

Need proof? Look no further than the first answer choice: my draft from fourth grade:

Real name redacted.

TSP was very loosely inspired by the Rainbow Magic fairies series. See, when I was writing the above project, I wanted to write a story about fairies, but because I Was Ten And Too Old For Fairies, I decided to make it about People With Powers. I'd role played a game based on Rainbow Magic a while back with stuffed animals finding out they were fairies (not really a plot point in Rainbow Magic, but my fairy obsession was based on that series - hence LOOSELY inspired).

Lexi, who went by her full name Alexia in this draft, had the surname Redinés. I guess I chose that because she wore red?

This first draft also featured an old married couple named Lizzy and Ted, who were renamed Liz and Charles in the second draft I wrote over a year later. I cut them in Draft Three when I deemed them unnecessary and focused on their grandkids, Carla and George.

The metal detector was the MacGuffin of the first, second, and third drafts of TSP because the titular portal was metal, therefore the only way to find it was via metal detector. Apparently. I got rid of it in 2017 with the start of Draft Four. I don't know why I kept it that long.

Speaking of 2017, that's when I decided to make TSP start in 2024. See, Lexi was a very blatant self-insert at the time, so I made her have my birthday. Part of TSP from Drafts 2-4 was it took place on Lexi's birthday. For convenience, I wanted this to be a Friday, and 2024 was the next time that date would fall on a Friday. Except it wasn't because it fell on a Friday in 2019, but I also was trying to be realistic and was confident I'd easily get it published by 2024 since I'd still be in high school 2019. Well uh... Yeah 2024 will be closer but I doubt it's the year TSP will be published.

I did get weird in my sophomore year of high school and decided that TSP would definitely work as one giant book. Previously I'd planned for six books, but then ambitiously decided to combine them into one. Projected word count would've been like 400K? What was I thinking???? I changed it back to six books (though now it's five).

I also decided that year to kill all of my characters except Ash. I thought this was a brilliant idea until I realized it wasn't. I slowly started bringing people back. (Some still die)

This was also the year a dear friend of mine who beta read that year nicknamed it "Teaspoon" because of the initials TSP. Until I stopped hanging out with him due to unavoidable circumstances (pandemic), I did get into the habit of referring to it as Teaspoon. I've fallen out of habit but I still tag my content on this blog related to it as teaspoon in case someone else wants to refer to it as that.

My character Liam was once named Seamus, technically. In Draft Four his name was Seamus Callaghan, but it never worked for me. I changed his surname to Beaumont, but it still didn't work so I made it Liam which is much better IMO and actually weirdly helped me write his character better because he had a different vibe. (Also he's trans and I couldn't imagine someone naming themselves Seamus...any trans guys named Seamus I'm sorry but it didn't work for him.)

And finally, telepathy and empathy were separate powers in Draft Four because I'm an idiot honestly. I made the magic system at age barely 15 and wasn't thinking. Cryokinesis was also separate from hydrokinesis too.

Hope this was fun and interesting! I certainly had fun!

Quiz for my WIP!!!

The following are all true behind the scenes facts of my WIP The Secret Portal... except one

Please vote no matter how little TSP knowledge you have and please reblog. This will be so fun

[honorhunt]

𝐈𝐓'𝐒 𝐋𝐔𝐍𝐀𝐑 𝐍𝐄𝐖 𝐘𝐄𝐀𝐑 — it’s the year of the tiger!! ( anyone else saying that to the tune of survivor? ) which means to celebrate the end of the end of 2021 and welcome the coming spring, i want to acknowledge each and every person who made the past year a kinder experience. it doesn’t matter if we wrote replies to rival tolstoy or if we’ve known each other for a full .3 seconds, you are someone i’m thankful to be around. someone i’m grateful to see on my dash, and someone i hope to know better. this post will address mutuals from across my blogs ( @aniimvs / @scoundrvls / @stalkvr ) but i will be posting it here on boba since he’s currently where i’m active ( so if you don’t follow this blog and you’re tagged that’s why, please excuse the intrusion ). 

so without further ado, here’s where i adore you:

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐔𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐎𝐒 ( old school, not death watch — gar saxon got nothing on jaster’s boys )

@commandsir / @graysistance + all your blogs  —

my dyad. my literary matchmade. my best friend. my soul sister. my author hype buddy ‘cause i will make sure every single one of your future novels sell out. you are the jedi to my sith and the six actions to my manda. i met you at a time when i wasn’t sure i had a place in the rpc anymore. i’d been gone for a few years and being the dumbass that i am, i thought the best way to get back into things was taking on a character i’ve not only wanted to write since 2015 but was, you know, a figure in social warfare. i thought i wouldn’t make it. that i didn’t have the talent or the personality to be here without my former friends. that they’re what made me me. i was a talentless hack otherwise. 

when you followed me, i was ecstatic but also terrified. i was scared that you’d be disappointed, especially after i had a syllabic upchuck about kylo after you asked a very simple question that needed a sentence or two to answer. but here we are, almost two years later. we’ve come far since the days of dancing around the question of shipping because we both felt the vibe but were just so nervous about where the other person stood. now we’re like “that plot sounds scandalous  — race you to the starter.��� 

i’m tearing up even now as i write this. it’s so dumb, i know, but you mean so much. i’m so honored to be part of your journey. as a writer, as a person. it’s a blessing to see how far you’ve come and to see how far you’ll go. if time turned back and i was told i had to endure all the hardships again for a chance to be friends with you again, i would. no hesitation. you’re family, puck. i’m grateful for the adventures we’ve had thus far, and i’m anticipating the future ones like an absolute child.

thank you for being my friend. here’s to the tiger fortifying your strength and protecting you against the evils of this world. may the force be with you, ori’vod.

@darkestshadeofgrey / @echoylaad + all your blogs  —

if puck is my sister, you’re my brother. dude, i feel like i’ve known you forever. it still hasn’t clicked in my brain that i met you in august 2020 and not in like, august 2010. but down to the nitty gritty: hell’s bells, i envy your mind. i’m over here thinking i’m doing pretty good with my ability to drive a story just like, “oh i can wing it i guess. it’ll just happen.” and you dive in with like ten thousand years of in depth, rich, beautiful, decadent character history that leads up to the single moment happening in the thread and i’m just living in your world. happily so ‘cause i just sip my coffee and watch god work his hand. if there’s a pantheon of plotlines, you are it.

but also, you as a person? you are a treasure koj. i’ve never had great luck in friendships. i’m very quiet and reserved. i will make excuses for other people’s behavior before i ever cut myself slake. i never think to defend myself. it’s always everything bad is deserved and everything good is by chance. and meeting you has healed some of the scar tissue that made me that way. the years of putting myself on the lowest rung possible so that no one else could. you’ve spoken to the lighthearted, good natured side of friendship but i’ve realized in a very quiet way, by your very nature, your presence is therapeutic. how welcoming and warmhearted you were the moment you said hello, i was shocked. i was shocked that you were willing to be so nice. to spend that energy on me. it felt sacred.

i hope i can return the favor. i hope beyond hope that i can. that you know how amazing and special you are. how perfect of a person. your flaws, your strengths, your talents, your abilities, all the magic that makes you who you are? beautiful. a masterpiece. i’m not joking, i’m not gushing, and i’m not speaking from bias. i adore you, but even if i was a fly on the wall instead of your friend, i’d still think the same way about you. i’d still recognize how lucky people are to have you in their life. so may this year bring you fortune and favor and may you only shine brighter.

@yunharlaquin / @alderheir / @warrued + all your blogs  —

k i t t y. my lil literary soul sister. it’s me, the affectionate bag of bones that haunts your discord. no but me being an old lady and an old man combined into one coffee-fueled gremlin aside, i will forever me in awe of your writing. my heart was bursting with joy when you followed me ‘cause like i said: fucking j a i n a,  dude. i didn’t think i’d find a lot of legends in the rpc and it is a bit of a struggle, so getting to talk nerdy with you brought back good memories that got me through dark times. 

your passion for the things you love is a godsend. even if i can’t respond right away, especially since i don’t know a stitch from a glitch. i sleep in my doc martens and call it fashion. so, i just sit in for the ride and smile along as you document all the fun you had in the group chat. all the ideas and the feels fest you’ve been plotting with each and every muse you somehow manage to harmonize. you are the embodiment of talent and honestly, i’m just lucky to there. to be able to nerd out and sob over characters and ships. to come up with plotlines that would put telenovelas to shame. 

as silly as it sounds, we haven’t gotten a chance to explore dynamics beyond familial because of our muse choices so this year, i’m on my tippy toes peeking over the wall of what’s to come, curious as to what heartbreaking shenanigans we’ll steeple our fingers at in the months to come. 

it’s an honor to be your friend, kitty. let’s see who’s the first to cry. 

@jaigalorad / @pclpatine  —

jaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay-ceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. dude, you give me human zoomies. anytime you pop onto discord or appear on the dash i start running around screeching the audible equivalent of a keyboard smash. you. are. such. an amazing. writer. and such. a good. dude. like, your replies cannot load fast enough. i just start pressing all the buttons or smacking my phone screen like an idiot whenever i get a notif with your name attached to it. i wish i was a faster writer cause i just always want something new to read from you. i’m just in awe. i literally start flailing when you reply. it’s gotten to the point where i take a decade to reply to you cause it HAS TO BE PERFECT. there can be nothing less that pristine when it comes to writing with jc. 

but on top of being the king himself, you really are a treat. being your friend, like, i’m shocked. i’m shocked that i’m so lucky. still. i know i say that about all my friends, but it’s true. like them, you are amazing. i knew good people who had talent that outshined the sun existed, i just never thought i’d be worthy of their acknowledgement. yet here we are, getting close to the two year mark that we’ve been writing bloody murder together.

and aside from my own selfish reasons for adoring you, i think it’s safe to say you are the heart of the swrpc. many come and go, but you are a staple. you’re a light and joy, and just an endearing presence that reminds people that is a creative endeavor of the soul. this a place to express the what-ifs and the maybes that we don’t get to see otherwise. you are a magnet for good energy and this community is blessed to have you.

i wish you all the love and success you deserve. for this year and all those still ahead. love ya, dude. gar jatnese be te jatnese.

@galaxycrxss / @hamadaxfighter  —

so it’s only been a few months since we started talking but can i just say i am actively anticipating your original work? the moment you announce that you got an agent i will be setting aside a fund so that when your work is published, i can  — and will  — buy as many copies as humanly possible. i will then proceed to donate them to as many libraries as i can while simultaneously chucking copies at random people on the street. i will hype your work up before i even get to read it ‘cause i already know it’s gonna be good. i don’t know a damn diddly thing but i’m invested. because i’ve seen what you can do with characters, the way you weave words together and unite minutia with big picture, making everything important even if its subtle. 

hiro is adorable. fordo is somehow even more badass than he originally was and the man was already an absolute unit of a demigod. crosshair and echo? vibrant. alive. thriving in the colors of blood and angst. i love it. i’m soft. and the way our muses click??? i keep forgetting it’s not canon. that boba didn’t actually modify his rifle with a scope because of crosshair ( that we know of ) or that boba’s fighting style became even more efficient because i got to meet an arc, the martial scions of his father and the true mandalorians. 

i . . . i’m also . . . not even joking when i say my mouth dropped when you interested in writing with jango. like, adding him to the multi was me being self indulgent ‘cause i love the man a lot. he’s one of my favorite characters but his time in canon was so tragically short, i figured no one would really want to write with him. and then you slid fordo over to him and shared all these amazing things that you came up with and how you’d really love to flesh them out with plots. fill in the telling with in depth showing as to why fordo respected jango so much, why he was the ultimate arc trooper. to be invited into the space? into that creative undertaking you did out of love for fordo, i  — no joke, i was tearing up. but ah fuck, it’s happening again. look, i’m a big crybaby sapling. i know i overreact but, still, it means a lot. to be your friend and to be someone you were so willing to share your ideas with, to be even a sliver in the spectrum of your storytelling. i . . . this year is gonna be amazing. i can’t wait for my heart to be obliterated by clanker slayer 3000, one shot 9000, and livin’ la vida echo.

@divineslcyer / @grcyrebcl  —

we only recently got to talking again after i rolled off kylo ‘cause work decided to throttle me dead. but holy hell you are a saint. like, i just, the thing that happened. wow, you . . . the fact that you tolerated me through that, i swear, dude. i will never be able to express how grateful i am for you not only being there for me but also trusting me with your own experiences. talk about trial by fire when it comes to “i wonder if we’d make good friends.” the answer is yes. a resounding yes. 

on a lighter note: look, i keep my personal culture to myself. and i know you know why. people can get real weird, real fast when it comes to policing others on their own identities and what makes them “real” or not. so keep it to myself and amongst friends. but damn was the latinization of the chat at dead o’ clock in the morning fucking amazing. i felt seen. like, yeah, we can all joke that the latine community has a lot in common no matter if we’re islander or mainland or what borders we got, but i was like no manches, it can’t be all true. but fuck, man, it is. i had to leave my bedroom i was shaking so bad. i woke my boyfriend up and was banished henceforth to the kitchen. you understood me, you UNDERSTOOD THE PLIGHT OF THE CHISMOSAS AND THE HONOR THAT IS LIPSTICK GRANNY KISSES. like, she got that generic red lipstick smeared across her teeth but damn if her smile ain’t the prettiest gem you ever did see. 

or how we have like thirty variations of genital slang and you can use each of those words five different ways with seven wildly different contexts each. like are you telling a dude he’s packing tissue paper or are you calling your husband by an endearing pet name. 

i knew we were gonna be great friends but if that wasn’t the funniest thing. it’s been days and i still randomly crack up. so yeah, i’m looking forward to the writing we’ll explore across all your blogs, with any and every muse you’ll throw my way.

but i’m also anticipating the payasadas. 

@pracses + all your blogs  —

aesthetic talent incarnate. like not only do you indulge my clone collector syndrome and send me spiraling with laughter with the ace content you send, but also like, you are the drugstore whisperer. i would’ve never expected to find bombass lashes in a grocery store, especially ones that actually work with my weird eye shape. and the looks you can pull off with eyeshadows that i cannot even begin to blend, damn. your looks are immaculate and the fact that you rock hard on a budget is sorcery in and of itself. like the looks you create??? i’d look like a sad peacock if i tried using the same palette.

anyway, aside from the mysticism that happens on your eyeballs, i love your writing. you have a talent for capturing character personality whether it’s in your visual art or your prose. i just balance my chin in my hands and rest in awe of your creativity. 

you’re also funny as fuck and i make the ugliest noises whenever the chat spouts off and your commentary starts rolling. your friendship is a treasure and so you are you. i’m looking forward to spiraling into chaos with you this coming year.

@acharnemcnt  —

well, well, well, if it isn’t kylo’s best nemesis, his villain-in-arms, and boba’s latest client foundling scamp. you’ve got a dedication and passion that i remain in awe of each time your writing and your thoughts grace my dash. i know we didn’t get to talk much last year. when we were just starting to plot things, every shred of my sanity was sacrificed to work and my presence shriveled up to nothing. i apologize for that but i’m hoping to make up for it this year. i really hope to be a better friend and writing partner. you’ve already left such a big impression, i seriously cannot unsee your hux. where there is a hux there is ame. the two just correlate and i so often forget where the line between canon and your original analysis. ‘cause i will be reading through novels or comics, fully expecting something to be there that isn’t because i read it on your blog.

@fasciinating  — 

i’m such a casual when it comes to star trek. i know like, five things, and i’m pretty sure they’re just memes. dude, i always had a soft spot for spock even though i’m as ignorant as they come, but i think you singlehandedly carved a spot for him in the center of my star wars heart. i’m sorry i’m so damn slow when it comes to our threads. i will literally write a reply. let it sit so i can edit it with fresh eyes and then when i come back to read it again, i don’t think it’s good enough so i delete it all and start again. i’m just so humbled by your presence. you bring such good energy to the dash. i’d be embarrassed to admit how many times i’ve physically choked on my coffee after seeing a crack post of yours. or how i will stop and read your threads even though i don’t have a clue what’s going on.

but also halo. halo, halo, hALO CONTENT. just the crumbs are enough to send me soaring. you feed my scifi soul, dude. so, i promise to be less of a dumbass this year so boba can have his misadventures with his towering little brother.  

@asycuwish  —

MY BOBA BUDDY. my twinning energy. you speak to those wild west days of tumblr when we all just followed each other: duplicates, personals, didn’t matter. we used giant ass gifs and titled threads. there was no small text, just WALLS. we haven’t written together yet but it’s gonna be a blast when we do. i don’t care what muses it’s with, or when or how. it’s gonna be a fun. you are a sweetheart, a valiant soul, and a dear friend. i look forward to our boba talks, and just the absolute comedy fest that our talks become. like, i cannot help but smile the moment i see a notif from discord come my way. and i look forward to every tuesday/wednesday to get fedexed into another dimension over book of boba with you. 

so i hope this year brings you peace and joy. and i wish you and your family good health. and i’m already anticipating the smiles to come. 

@echoylir / @gladiateshe  —

SAKDJHSDFG!!! the inhuman sounds i made when you came back were only intensified when the return of neves followed soon after. your ocs are captivating and i’m bouncing like an atom over your new bae. i hope this year shines brighter for you and i can’t hyped for all the mando shenanigans we’ll get up to. welcome home! i’m grateful to see you back on my dash.

@druisg  — 

so i know we talk sporadically and we’re not always chilling in the same fandom. but you are such a kind soul. you got queen energy like nobodies business, and you tolerate me. which is impressive considering i thought dune was dude. you are merciful. but wherever you go, whichever muse you choose to develop and explore beyond the limits of their canon  — i cheer for you. you are the sunbeam on my dash. you have such a good heart and freeing spirit. you bring out the best in others and inspire them to be the best for themselves. never let anyone tell you otherwise. you deserve all the warmth you share returned in kind tenfold, mal. keep being true to yourself and may this year treat you right.

@avrorean  — 

hey, so this is probably incredibly out of the blue ‘cause you don’t even follow me on this blog and we haven’t spoken in years, but we became mutuals back when i was writing kili. that’s almost ten years, dude. a whole damn decade. that’s a lot. that’s a lot of life happening. and even though we’re not active buddies anymore, just seeing you still writing nanna and knowing that you’re doing well, that you’re okay, it makes me smile. so, just a shout out to being an amazing person since the dawn of your existence. we may not write together anymore but that doesn’t mean i don’t have incredibly fond memories of our shenanigans. thank you and have an amazing coming year. i wish you all the good this world has to offer.

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐄 𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐈𝐓

@ncxile + @aetcrnus​ / @gurrillero + @infortunas / @fallesto / @niner1309 + @stubborn-amphibian / @mudhrns / @congeriemgriseo / @fleetadmrl / @rcfekjwtaardby / @krhyze + @shanded / @rebelrug / @killedarlings / @uniforced / @fatewills + @warnymphs / @brotherfell / @solhjerte / @hxdrostorm / @spirekept / @divcrse / @mitthexile / @kalesera / @arakkhna / @lovesaving + @starmother / @paramounticebound / @vagasbonds / @conlink / @featherstcnes / @celestaei / @manaborn / @viperofmandalore / @kyberled / @vuulpecula / @cosmosreign + @kaestis + @greyturned / @noxiovs / @griefdestined / @libertydestined + @hopeshreds / @asmodcus / @skjebne / @adversitybloomed / @rcvival / @enjedi / @murroyilodel / @fcalty / @senatcrdala + @fuzzbcll / @rebehllious / @lessersinned / @jaigeyed / @tempesttragedy / @dangercade / @sithstolen / @jakkuforce / @ancientsith / @heartsurpluss / @vaderari / @heirite / @jainah / @godblooded / @mvstangsally + @devlsdautr 

[snowdice]

Little Kestrel (Part 46) [Birds of Different Feathers Series]

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Relationships: Logan & Patton & Virgil (future Virgil/Patton but not in this story)

Characters:

Main: Logan, Patton, Virgil

Appear: Thomas

Mentioned: Janus

Summary:

It was supposed to be a quick job either way. Either Virgil would assassinate King Thomas of Prijaznia or he’d be caught and get executed. Yet, when Virgil gets the wrong bedroom and gets caught by Prince Logan and his future royal advisor, Patton, the job ends up getting way more complicated for the 14-year-old. He also ends up sleeping in a (actually pretty comfortable) closet for a few weeks…

Notes: Implied/referenced child abuse, assassination attempt, knives, torture mentioned, captivity, teenagers being really dumb, sexual coercion of minors implied, a minor offering sexual favors

This is a prequel to Kill Dear. I wrote it 100 words at a time on my blog, but this is the edited version. If you want to see how it was crafted (and possibly some future content), look at the tag proofread stories.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21 Part 22 Part 23 Part 24 Part 25 Part 26 Part 27 Part 28 Part 29 Part 30 Part 31 Part 32 Part 33 Part 34 Part 35 Part 36 Part 37 Part 38 Part 39 Part 40 Part 41 Part 42 Part 43 Part 44 Part 45

Patton hadn’t been aware until Virgil came along what exactly Mr. Deknis did in the winter. Most of his staff had gone home or had winter tasks unrelated to gardening to do, but Mr. Deknis and a few choice members of his staff still apparently did a lot despite not being able to plant anything.

He frequently invited Virgil to join in on these tasks, and Virgil often accepted. Patton wasn’t sure why he seemed to enjoy things like deep cleaning gardening tools and checking over equipment, but he did, so Patton was glad.

“Alright, that’s enough of that for today,” Mr. Deknis said once Virgil finished brushing off the paste that had been applied to remove rust from a hoe.

“Are you sure?” Virgil asked. “I have more time to work. Even if you need to go, I can still work on something. Unless you don’t want me messing with things without supervision…”

“I’m not telling you to leave, Virgil,” Mr. Deknis said with a half-smile. “I just thought you might want to help me out with something else today.”

“Oh, okay. Sure,” Virgil agreed, sounding just a touch excited.

“Let’s put all of this away,” Mr. Deknis said.

Virgil and Patton helped him put things away, though Patton felt more like a hindrance as both Mr. Deknis and Virgil seemed to know exactly where everything in the room went whereas Patton wasn’t sure about some things.

Patton didn’t always come with Virgil when he was helping Mr. Deknis. Sometimes Logan would come instead, and Virgil had been coming alone with increasing frequency over the last month or so.

He seemed to like it. He always seemed to look forward to spending time with Mr. Deknis and not only because Mr. Deknis often bribed him with snacks of dried or pickled fruits and vegetables.

Once the tools and cleaning equipment were stored away, Mr. Deknis led them down the hall. Mr. Deknis had an entire hall to himself on the first floor of the castle which included his bedroom as well as places to dry and can things.

Where he was leading them now was a small study next to his bedroom. Patton had never been there before and by the way Virgil was curiously looking around, neither had he. It was a cute little area with a small desk and a bookshelf full of books that seemed to all be on plants.

“I’m starting to think about what I want to grow in the gardens next year,” Mr. Deknis explained as they crammed into the small office. He pointed to a large piece of paper on his desk.  “This is the plan at the moment, though it’s nowhere near finalized.”

He pointed at an empty square sketched on the large paper. “I was thinking I wanted to plant something new here, but I don’t know what. It’s just a small patch between the vegetable and flower garden. It’s sort of by the one three teared fountain. I usually use that patch for newer plants, so it could be a vegetable or a flower. I was thinking you could help me pick out something to put there.”

Virgil looked up at him, eyes wide.

Mr. Deknis smiled at him. “Would you like to?”

“I…” Virgil said. “I wouldn’t have any idea what to put.”

“Well, I have a few different books of plants you can flip through,” he said. “Any idea what kind of plant you’d like to grow?”

Virgil shrugged.

“I’ll just give you a few for now,” Mr. Deknis said, selecting three different books. “If you can’t find anything you like, just let me know and I’ll give you another book. There are plenty of different types of things to grow. This is just a start.”

“Thank you,” Virgil said, eyes staring down at the field of flowers drawn on the cover of the book on the top of the stack in his arms.

They spent the afternoon on the floor of Mr. Deknis’ living room. The gardener made them some lavender tea and let them eat some candied walnuts and then retreated to an armchair to read his own book about plants.

Patton and Virgil laid on the floor flipping through the different books. Virgil still wasn’t very good at reading, so Patton would read the descriptions of the plants that caught his eye to him. One of the books was about different vegetables and one was about herbs, which of course, did catch Virgil’s attention a bit because of his love for edible things. Yet the pictures of flowers seemed to interest him the most.

They ended up eventually looking only in the flower book. A while after that, it became clear that he preferred flowers in the orchid family verses composite flowers because he liked the shape of their petals better. So, then they focused more on looking at the different types of orchids that existed.

“There are a lot more types of orchids than I knew there were,” Patton said.

“It’s the second largest family of flowers,” Mr. Deknis told them from his chair. “There’s a lot of different kinds, over 28,000 species at least. Vanilla comes from an orchid plant. If there are none in that book you especially want, I could get a book specifically on orchids.”

Virgil, having already flipped through the book multiple times looking at the orchids in it, looked up at him with a bit of excitement in his eyes. “I would like that,” he said. “Yes, please.”

Mr. Deknis’ eyes softened on him, and he got to his feet. “I’ll go see what I have in the office.”

“Getting to grow something in the garden is exciting,” Patton said once Mr. Deknis left.

“Yeah,” Virgil agreed. “It is.”

It was very nice of Mr. Deknis too, Patton thought. He didn’t have to offer to let Virgil plant something, in fact, him happening to have an empty patch in his plans was probably a little bit of a fib, but it was a nice one.

Virgil liked plants, and it would give him something to look forward to over the winter and then something to do in the spring and summer. Honestly, Patton couldn’t wait to see him experience the castle in the spring. He’d already loved it in the fall, let alone when things started to grow. Patton had a feeling he’d be spending a lot more time outside this summer.

Mr. Deknis came back with a good-sized book filled with pictures of flowers. “Why don’t you take this with you for tonight,” he suggested. “It’s almost dinner time. We can talk about it more when you come to help me again on Saturday.”

“Thank you,” Virgil said, taking the book. “I will see you Saturday then.”

“See you Saturday, Virgil,” he said with a smile.

Want to read more? Click below!

Part 47

Birds of Different Feathers Master Post

My Masterpost

[snelbz]

Life As We Know It {Chapter Three}

Summary: After the sudden deaths of Nesta’s sister and Cassian’s best friend, they gain guardianship of their nephew, Nyx.

Based on Life As We Know It (2010) and a prompt sent in by anonymous for our Nessian fanfic contest. This is a modern au.

Instead of doing a tag list for this story, we have decided to have a set posting schedule. Chapters will be posted weekly on Mondays and Thursdays. Chapters will be posted on both my and Tara’s blogs! >> @tacmc.

Life As We Know It Masterlist

Shelby’s Masterlist

Tara’s Masterlist

Nesta sat across the kitchen table in Azriel and Elain’s kitchen, looking at her sister.

“I mean, I just don’t get it,” Nesta continued, shaking her head. “Me and Cassian… Why didn’t they choose you and Azriel? You’ve been together forever and want a big family.”

“You’re second guessing taking care of Nyx?” Elain asked, with no judgement, just curiosity.

“No, of course not,” Nesta began, sighing. “It’s just… Me and Cassian?”

“They did try to set you two up all those years ago,” Elain said, propping an elbow on the table and dropping her chin in her hand.

Nesta raised an eyebrow and crossed her arms. “And how well did that work out?”

Elain rolled her eyes, but sighed. “Feyre was right though,” she said, looking at the letter from Rhys and Feyre, laying face down on the table. Nesta had brought it over for Elain to read, which had just made them both start crying over again. “You have the fiercest heart. Nyx needs you in his life.”

She blinked away the tears lining her eyes again. Silently, she wondered when she’d be able to think about her sister, about Rhys again, without dissolving into tears. She knew it would be a long while.

Finally, she said, “I know he does. I just don’t understand why Cassian has to be involved. That’s not going to be a healthy environment for him to grow up in.”

She could already see it, she and Cassian at each other’s throats. He knew how to get under her skin, loved to do it, did it as often as he could. It would be all Nyx saw as he grew up, his guardians screaming at each other.

“He needs to be somewhere happy and loving and peaceful. Like here, Lainy. He’d flourish here, with you and Az and Seph.”

Elain gave her sister a long, wistful look. Her eyes were soft and misty when she said, “We’re just learning to take care of one, Nes. I can’t… We can’t take on another infant. And, besides, it wasn’t what Feyre and Rhys wanted.”

“They probably wrote that the second they got engaged,” Nesta said, knowing that wasn’t true. “They didn’t know what they wanted.” Elain glanced at the open letter that sat on the table between them. “I read it. They knew exactly what they wanted for Nyx in case something happened to them, and I think that they were right. Just because you and Cassian can’t see it doesn’t mean that it’s not a good idea.”

“The lawyer will disagree with that,��� Nesta muttered, remembering Tarquin’s words from their meeting. I tried to advise them against this. She shivered. “The thought of living with Cassian and playing house has me nauseous. And pissed off. So pissed off that I’m nauseous.”

Elain sighed again. “He really is a-.”

“A good guy,” Nesta interrupted, letting her head fall into her hands. Her fingers tugged in the roots slightly. “I know. You keep telling me that. Feyre always told me that. Everyone keeps telling me that. But the two of us?” She looked up at Elain, letting her see into those eyes that matched Feyre’s perfectly, letting her see the slight panic in them, letting her see everything. “We aren’t compatible. Everything about him, it throws me off.”

A cry from down the hall had both of the women standing, but when Nesta realized it was Nyx, she hurried out of the kitchen. In a flash, she was in the spare room, crossing to the small crib Elain and Az had set up for Feyre and Rhys when they found out they were pregnant.

Nyx’s blue eyes were wide and he let out another tortured wail and Nesta tried to soothe him before he was even in her arms. “It’s okay, bubba,” she cooed, holding him against her chest. He kept crying, though the volume of his screams lessened. Instead they were more akin to what Nesta would have almost called sobs.

“It’s been a long day,” she breathed. “I think we should go home, yeah?”

She gathered his diaper bag from where it laid on the bed and when she entered the living room, Elain was sitting on the couch, reading over the letter again. Quiet tears slid down her cheeks.

“I’m gonna get him home,” Nesta said, softly. She repeated, “It’s… It’s been a long day.”

Nodding, Elain folded the letter back up and wiped at the tears on her face with the back of her hand. “Right.” She held the letter out to Nesta, who took it, careful not to jostle Nyx who had finally quieted down, though Nesta could tell he was still awake.

His little hand was pressed to the side of her neck, and she could feel it moving gently.

“Call me if you need anything,” Elain said, carefully hugging her and pressing a kiss to the top of Nyx’s head. “Az and I will help you move what you need to into the house, so don’t hesitate to ask.”

Nesta could only nod, still unsure of how she was going to do this, how she was going to live her life, while also taking care of the far more precious one in her arms. She silently left, driving home and getting Nyx inside and settled, letting him sit in the Bumbo seat she’d found in the kitchen atop the counter while she cooked dinner.

After putting him down for bed, Nesta found herself sitting on the balcony off of Rhys and Feyre’s old bedroom. She looked out into the small wood that made up their backyard, over the pool and chairs that had been set up for the approaching summer, but her eyes were drawn up to the stars that Velaris was famous for.

“I don’t know how to do this,” she whispered, not sure if she was admitting it to herself or to Rhys and Feyre, listening to her wherever they were. “I’m so scared I’ll do something wrong.”

The sounds of crickets and other manner of nighttime creatures were the only reply she received.

“I know you believed in me, in us, but I don’t. I want to make you both proud but I don’t know if I can do that. I just need something to tell me that I’m not making a huge mistake and-.

She softly gasped as a shooting star went blazing across the sky, a second one following it right after.

Her lip trembled as she nodded up at the night sky, understanding, knowing who had sent those stars. She almost felt like she could feel them there, as if they were telling her that it would be hard, but she could do it.

And she… she didn’t have to do it alone.

*

Cassian wasn’t at Az and Elain’s for thirty seconds before he crossed to the mini-fridge Azriel kept stocked in the garage.

“There’s no way they thought this was a good idea,” he said, pacing around, Azriel silently watching him. “It’s a sick joke, just like all of this is. There’s another letter somewhere that says just kidding, wouldn’t that be funny though?”

He cracked open the beer and drank it all in one go.

“I mean, Rhys and I always messed around and shit, but…this is too far,” he went on, tossing the can in the garbage and reaching for another one.

Azriel crossed his arms as he said, “Too many of those and you may think it’s funny, too.”

Cassian shot him a look as he drank from his can. “This isn’t funny. None of this is funny.”

Azriel took a deep breath before saying, “Did you stop to think that maybe they knew exactly what they were doing?”

Cassian said nothing as he propped himself on a stool and shook his head. Azriel didn’t push him. Eventually, Cassian said, quietly, “I want to help Rhys. I want to be the man that he thought I was. I mean, shit, he left me in charge of his child. And I would die for that child. But, Nesta was right, you know? I have no idea how to take care of a kid, especially one as young as Nyx.”

“You think I did, when Seph came along?” He asked, leaning back against the workbench. Cassian was as comfortable in this garage as he was his own, had created just as many beautiful things here as he had in his own cramped space. But he focused on Azriel’s words, sighed as he listened to his brother.

“I was scared shitless, but that didn’t mean a thing to her, or to Elain,” he went on. “Because they both needed me. They needed me to get my shit together and figure it out, and that’s exactly what I did.”

Cassian didn’t say anything, he just looked down at his feet, at his dirty work boots and silently drank from the can in his hands.

Azriel crossed the garage and pulled out a beer of his own, cracking it open and taking a drink. “So read the books, do the research, go online, do whatever you have to do, but Cassian, listen to me.”

His brother rarely used his full name, so he looked up at him, nor expecting to find the tenderness on his face or the silver lining his eyes.

“If you think for one second that Rhys and Feyre didn’t know what they were doing, you’re wrong. No one loves that little boy as much as you do. Yeah, you’re probably going to fuck up once or twice, but it’s okay.” Azriel placed a hand on his shoulder. “It happens and as long as you learn from it, that’s all that matters.”

Cassian wiped at his eye with the back of his hands. “I’m fucking scared, man.”

“I know you are,” Az replied, his voice dropping, almost gentle. “Not to mention we’re all still hurting. But you and Nesta are going to be fine, Nyx is going to be fine.”

Cassian clamped his eyes shut. He groaned. “It wouldn’t be so bad, I know I can learn to take care of Nyx, but Nesta? They expect me to live with Nesta?”

Azriel actually hesitated. “Yeah, that sucks.”

Cassian, despite himself, laughed quietly. “Yeah.”

“But, believe it or not, I think she’d be good for you,” Azriel said, keeping that quiet tone.

“Now you’re trying to set us up?” Cassian asked, wiping at his eyes and the tears that had nearly fallen.

Azriel shook his head. “No. But, Nesta Archeron gets shit done. And she loves Nyx, too. The two of you together….different parenting styles? Yeah. But, you’d be surprised at how well two opposites balance each other out when it comes to parenting.”

Cassian thought of Azriel and Elain. They were both gentle and kind, but they were pretty opposite, too.

“And if it’s a complete failure?” Cassian asked.

Azriel sighed as he watched Cassian. At last, he said, “It won’t be.”

Cassian wanted to believe him, wanting to feel confident in the words Azriel said, but even his third beer hadn’t lifted his confidence.

He let his head fall back, staring up at the ceiling, at the garage door that was raised to allow the cool, night breeze in. “I have to live with Nesta Archeron. The Mother thinks she’s funny. The Cauldron is laughing at me. Fate is rubbing its hands together and laughing maniacally.”

“No,” Az chuckled. “I think that might be Rhys.”

Cassian snorted, but the door to the house opened and Elain stuck her head out. She smiled softly at Cassian, who raised his drink in greeting. “I thought I heard you out here. You gonna stay for dinner?”

His alternative was grabbing something from a drive through or searching through his fridge for something that wasn’t completely freezer burned, so he smiled and said, “Sure, Lainy. Thanks.”

She beamed at them both and the door clicked shut behind her as she turned to go back to the kitchen. Cassian looked over at Azriel to find him still smiling like a fool at the door.

He sighed quietly as he realized he would probably never have that, would never have someone he could stare after and gaze at as fondly as Azriel did Elain. Not if he was to spend his life shackled to someone who wanted absolutely nothing to do with him.

As soon as he thought the words, he chastised himself, stepping out into the driveway. She was just as miserable about the whole ordeal as he was. But for Nyx, they could try and make it work. They would make it work. They would do what they had to.

He sighed, gazing up into the night sky.

Shaking his head, he wondered if there was some sort of afterlife. If there was, he wondered if Rhysand and Feyre were somewhere in the sky, looking down at him, trying to encourage him, trying to get a message to him during this horrible, hectic, anxiety-ridden unknown time.

He hoped they were.

He could use it.

That encouragement.

That love.

Cassian began raising his can to his lips, but then he froze.

A shooting star shot across the night sky.

Then another.

Cassian’s hand fell back to his side as he stared at the bright Velaris starlight, completely in awe.

They were watching, they were there with him. They were there with all of them.

Of course they were.

Cassian swore under his breath as he fully gave into the ridiculous notion of moving in with Nesta, of co-parenting with the most frustrating, stubborn woman in Prythian.

But for Nyx, he would.

For Rhysand, for Feyre, he would.