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persevereforahappyending · 1 year

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This isn't Your Fault (Anika POV)

Pairing: Tara Carpenter x Reader

Summary: Anika’s hands shook, she almost dropped the phone at hearing Tara beg for your life.

Warning: Implied Violence

Word Count: 6.2k+

Main Masterlist | Series Masterlist

Anika sighed as she locked her phone. She had asked you about the Halloween party in class and you had turned her down. She had been texting you ever since just to double check. Your latest excuse for not going was that your parents were out of town, and you were using the house to yourself to stay up late and play video games. Anika pointed out that was literally no different than any other day and you had left her on read after that.

Anika knew you hated parties, but you only ever saw Mindy when she came to pick Anika up from one of your study sessions or when working on a project, or in your shared class with her. Anika wanted you to spend time with her and Mindy in a normal social setting. You were one of Anika’s best friends and she just wanted you to get to know her girlfriend and other friends properly. She knew Mindy could be suspicious and intense with new people, but she had really worked hard to get her girlfriend to not glare at you and outright accuse you of potential nefarious purposes.

Anika knew when to give up though, she knew you’d never come to the party. So, she decided to just enjoy the night with her girlfriend and then tell you all about it tomorrow. She knew you wouldn’t care but Anika liked to pretend you might regret not coming.

The party had been going great. Anika had a drink in one hand and was sitting in Mindy’s lap. Everything was great until she noticed Frankie trying to pull Tara upstairs. Anika quickly pulled herself away from Mindy before grabbing Chad and point to where Tara was. Anika stood to the side as Chad confronted Frankie, getting in a slight scuffle with him until Sam showed up and tased Frankie. Anika couldn’t even feel bad for Frankie, based on the few stories she heard about the guy, she could confidently say he deserved it.

Anika stayed to the back of the group as Sam and Tara argued. Anika was used to it by this point and knew not to get in the middle of their fighting. She pulled out her phone, shooting you a text to say she had left the party early and she couldn’t wait to tell you about the eventful night. You didn’t respond, so Anika figured you were engulfed by your game, as usual.

Anika was caught off guard when a group of girls called Sam a murderer and one of them threw their drink on Sam. Anika moved quickly along with Mindy and Chad to hold Tara back. Tara might have been angry with her sister but that didn’t matter because the second anyone else so much as looked at Sam wrong, Tara was ready to lunge and beat the person. Mindy might have been the paranoid one, ready to accuse everyone, and Sam might have been the strong intimidating one, but Anika had to admit she was most scared of Tara. The girl could be happy and laughing one moment then in the blink of an eye she could be giving someone a murderous look and ready to beat them with her bare hands if she had to.

Anika followed everyone back to Sam and Tara’s apartment. While Tara stormed off to her room, Mindy dragged Anika over to the couch, bringing her down with her. Anika happily flung her legs over Mindy’s lap, practically sitting on top of her again. The night hadn’t turned out like she wanted to, but it didn’t seem like a totally crappy ending to the night.

Anika looked at her phone again, frowning when she saw you still hadn’t even opened her message. She knew you really got into your gaming and would spend hours upon hours playing, but you usually looked at your phone during a cut scene or a calm part of the game as you liked to say. Anika glanced up occasionally to see if Chad had decided on a channel to watch but she was more focused on texting you again. She didn’t want to seem paranoid, but she just needed you to give her a simple ‘I’m alive’ text and she would be fine for the rest of the night.

“You good T?” Mindy asked, bringing Anika’s attention away from her phone. She looked up to see Tara having entered the room, tear filled eyes and a phone to her ear. Anika quickly swung her legs off Mindy and leaned forward.

“Tara?” Sam asked slowly, as she stood up from her seat. “Who’s on the phone?” Anika had never experienced anything related to Ghostface, but she could hear the worry and concern in Sam’s voice. She could see the underlying fear in Mindy and Chad’s eyes.

Tara’s eyes wandered the room before landing on Sam. Anika could see the tears slowly start to fall from Tara’s eyes when she looked at her sister. Anika had seen Tara mad and annoyed before, usually at Sam. She had also seen her happy when they were all hanging out or when talking about movies with Mindy. Anika had never seen her scared though and it was clear whatever Tara was hearing on the other end of the line had her terrified.

“Y/N?” Tara asked. Anika shot to her feet at hearing your name. “Y/N?” Anika scrunched her brow, she was worried, but she was also curious, she didn’t realize you and Tara knew each other. She saw Chad turn off the TV and she felt Mindy’s presence standing behind her.

Anika was aware you shared a class with Tara, but she figured you’d never talked to her just like how you were with Mindy in the class you shared with her. Anika didn’t think you had ever even spoken to Tara, she thought you only knew of her based on how Anika talked about hanging out with the group. Whenever she came over to your place, she would give you a rundown of what happened between now and the last time she saw you and it usually involved talking about the gang.

“Baby, are you there?” Tara asked again, the concern pouring out of her voice.

Anika’s eyes went wide, apparently you did know Tara, you knew Tara very well. Based on the shock of the others in the room it was clear no one knew about you and Tara’s secret relationship. Anika was going to have to interrogate you about that after whatever was going on was resolved. She knew whatever was going on wasn’t good. She knew your parents were out of town and you were home alone, you also hadn’t answered any of her texts sense she got to the party. Anika wanted to hope so bad that you hadn’t responded to her because you were too busy being on the phone with Tara, but she knew that wasn’t likely.

Anika watched as Tara jumped multiple times from whatever she was hearing on the other end of the phone. Tara even began hyperventilating. As Sam tried to get Tara to calm down and get control of her breathing Anika’s eyes slowly started to fill with tears.

“Don’t hurt them, please,” Tara begged, her voice cracking. This made Anika bring a hand to her mouth, trying to contain a sob, but she couldn’t stop the tears from falling. Even though Anika had never experienced a Ghostface attack, she like all the others knew exactly what was going on now.

When Sam turned and looked at them Anika knew Mindy and Chad were ready for whatever she was about to say. She didn’t need to see either of their faces to know. She was sure that despite the fear they were surely feeling they would do anything Sam asked. Anika tried to put on a brave face as well, wiping away a few of the stray tears that still fell.

“We need to move,” Sam said. Everyone started moving. Anika wasn’t sure where they were all trying to go, she just knew they were suddenly bumping into each other and tripping over everything. “Call 911,” she ordered, ignoring all the tripping they were doing.

Chad fumbled with his phone, quickly pulling it out of his pocket. “An address would be helpful,” Chad said as he was dialing 911.

“On it,” Anika said, her voice shaky. She wiped away a few more tears as she pulled out her phone, getting your address.

“Please! She has nothing to do with this!” Tara sobbed. Anika’s hands shook, she almost dropped the phone at hearing Tara beg for your life. She quickly found your address and showed Chad, who quickly read it off to the 911 operator.

“Please,” Tara begged again. She was sobbing and her breathing was becoming more and more erratic. Anika couldn’t even begin to imagine what horrible thing you might be going through that was causing Tara so much stress. Anika saw Sam take off towards Tara’s room, but she was to rattled to notice anything else.

“No!” Tara screamed, shaking Anika out of her own head. Anika wanted to help, she wanted to know what was going on, she needed you to be okay. Sam came running back into the room, straight over to Tara and handing her her inhaler.

Anika watched as Sam tried to take the phone away from Tara and Tara slapped her hand away, keeping it just out of reach. When Sam gripped Tara by the shoulders to force her to look at her Anika saw Tara’s hand form into a fist. Anika thought for a split second that she’d witness Tara deck Sam. Anika knew Tara had one hell of a punch; she also knew Tara tended to start swinging before registering who she was swinging at. Luckily Tara saw it was Sam grabbing her and unclenched her fist.

“We have to go,” Sam told Tara.

“I can’t,” Tara sobbed. “I-I-I-can’t. I-” Tara started stuttering, her breathing becoming worse. Even when Tara would get upset and angry with Sam or with some random stranger saying something negative about her or Sam Anika had never seen Tara so worked up. Anika wasn’t just worried about you; she was worried about Tara. Sam remained calm though, handing Tara her inhaler and helping lift it to her mouth.

“Let’s go,” Sam said again, somehow being the calmest person in the room. “We can’t help here,” she continued, trying to convince Tara to leave with her. “Let’s go.” Tara finally nodded and got to following Sam. Anika pulled out her phone, texting Sam your address. “Chad!” she yelled.

“Already calling 911,” he answered instantly, he had the phone to his ear as he continued talking to the 911 operator.

“Anika-”

“Already texted you her address,” Anika said softly. She was trying to remain calm and not lose her mind until after she knew exactly what was happening to you.

Then next thing Anika knew Sam and Tara were disappearing through the front door, rushing down the steps, headed hopefully to your rescue. Anika gripped her phone tightly as she started sobbing, struggling to catch her breath much like Tara had been.

“Babe,” Mindy said worriedly. “Hey, hey, it’s okay,” she gripped Anika gently by the arm, standing in front of her. “It’s going to be okay. She is going to be okay.” Anika met Mindy’s eyes and didn’t see the confidence she was trying to project.

“You don’t know that,” Anika said, shaking her head. “We have no idea what he’s doing to her,” she sobbed. Mindy instantly pulled her into a hug as she began sobbing into her girlfriend’s shoulder.

“I think the only one that needs to worry is Ghostface,” Chad said. “I mean when Tara gets her hands on him,” he did a couple air punches. “Oof, I wouldn’t want to be him.”

Anika pulled away from Mindy, wiping at her tears as she chuckled at Chad. Despite the circumstances and the unknown Chad had somehow managed to break the tension.

“Who is Y/N, by the way?” Chad asked, smiling awkwardly as he clearly tried to keep the mood light.

Anika started to tear up again. “Hey,” Chad said softly, tapping Anika’s shoulder lightly to get her to look at him. “Tell me about her.” Anika wiped the tears from her eyes again but was reluctant. “Please?” Chad looked at her with the same puppy dog eyes Mindy always used on her. “We won’t know anything until Sam calls. Until then, tell me about her.”

Anika nodded. Mindy wrapped an arm around her waist and led her back over to the couch. Chad took her hand, giving it a comforting squeeze as he sat on the other side of Anika.

“We met in class,” Anika said, smiling as she thought back to her first time meeting you. “Audio.”

“I thought you hated audio?” Chad questioned.

“Oh, I do,” Anika laughed at the memory. “But it’s required. Even if I don’t need to know editing and mixing audio, it’s beneficial to know how to run audio and the different types of microphones used and everything. I want to work in theater and there’s no do overs and reshoots when there’s a live performance.”

“And that’s another reason film is better,” Mindy commented.

Anika rolled her eyes. “There’s nothing like live theater.” Anika playfully slapped Mindy’s arm. “Maybe you’d understand that if you took me to the theater,” she mumbled the last part.

“You guys can fight about this later, tell me more about Y/N,” Chad said, waving his hands at the beginnings of the potential argument about film vs theater.

“Anyway,” Anika said, turning back to face Chad. “Y/N is an audio major, which is good because she totally carried me through that class.” Anika started to talk more about how she met you and everything, remembering how different the two of you were but how easily you clicked.

Anika had walked into class, dreading having to learn audio. She was beating herself up for not just choosing a major that only involved theater. Anika didn’t want to act and be on stage, she wanted to run the lighting, set the scene. The best major to learn all that though involved having to know about everything. Anika had to admit lighting and sound went together a lot and she did want to learn how to run the sound along with the lights, she wanted to be involved in everything that helped enhance a live performance, and the things that really made it come alive.

Anika had ended up taking a seat next to you. You had large headphones on as you scribbled in a notebook. Anika wasn’t sure whether you were writing or doodling. The only thing Anika could see was your laptop propped open with some sort of audio editing software pulled up. She knew it was audio related because she was confused as she looked at the various different colored bars and wavy lines. She quietly groaned because she had sat next to someone who clearly knew what they were doing.

As soon as the professor came in you closed all the tabs, quickly shutting your laptop before slipping the headphones off your head, letting them rest around your neck. As the professor started talking and writing things on the board Anika pulled out her own notebook. She was aware of you flipping your notebook to a clean page, but she was too busy squinting at the professor as he quickly talked about microphones. Anika blinked a few times, looking down at her paper, she had the words dynamic, condenser, and ribbon as the three main types of microphones but had nothing else written.

Anika spared a glance to her left and saw you quickly writing in your notebook, your page more than half full. Anika’s eyes widened; she hadn’t seen you look up once, but it seemed like you were getting everything down as the professor said it. Anika looked back up at her professor to see him pulling out a box, pulling out each different type of microphone so everyone could see the differences with their own eyes.

Anika sighed, slumping back into her seat. She tossed her pen down and didn’t even bother trying to catch up on her notes. There was no way she was ever going to pass the class. It was day one and not even a half an hour into her first class and she’d already accepted her failure. The next thing she knew her professor was dismissing class. She shook her head, getting out of her daydream, she looked down to see she still only had three words written down. She glanced your way again, seeing you had moved onto a second page and that was already half full.

You started packing up when you seemed to notice Anika staring at you. When Anika realized you were looking at her, she mumbled, “Sorry.” She let out a defeated sigh before she closed her notebook.

“Would you like to borrow my notes?” You asked.

“Thanks,” Anika said, giving you a soft smile. “I’m not sure it would do much good. I kind of don’t understand a single thing about all of this,” she gestured around the classroom.

You chuckled lightly. “Yeah, if it ain’t your thing, it kind of doesn’t make any sense.” Anika chuckled along with you. “I could help you out, if you want.” You scratched at the back of your head, then began fidgeting with your headphones, you clearly weren’t used to this type of interaction.

“I would love that!” Anika said a little too quickly, making you jump back a little. “Sorry,” she said more quietly. “I would really like that, if you don’t mind of course.”

“I don’t mind.”

“I’m just warning you; this is your last chance to backout, it will take many study sessions and many hours to make me even begin to grasp this stuff.”

You chuckled again. “I’ll take my chances. Who knows, when I’m done with you, you’ll be able to pass this class with a C,” you joked.

Anika’s mouth fell open in offense. “Really? We don’t even know each other and you’re already being mean to me?”

You just shrugged. “I mean if you want to take your chances without my help and your notetaking, go for it,” you gestured to her notebook.

“You’re a mean new friend,” Anika grumbled.

“Yeah,” you sighed. “I’m terribly mean. I mean what kind of person would offer to lend their notes and then offer to help out the stranger next to them in class when they don’t even know their name?”

“I truly terrible person,” Anika said seriously but then broke out into a fit of laughter, with you quickly joining in. “I’m Anika,” she held out her hand to you.

“Y/N,” you introduced yourself, taking her hand. “Do you have another class, or would you like to go over the notes now?”

“Now works, I saw a coffee shop not too far from here.”

The two of you left the classroom, making your way to the coffee shop. You both ordered drinks before picking out a table large enough to open your notebooks. The two of you spent a couple hours there, going over the notes you had taken in class with Anika asking a billion questions. She felt stupid for making you re-explain like the entire class you had both just been in, but you never made her feel stupid for it and happily explained everything to her. You had actually spent so much time talking that you ended up having to rush off to your next class before you were late, but you and Anika promised to meet up after your audio class every week to go over whatever she needed help with.

And that’s how the rest of the semester went. Anika would go to audio and be confused then she would meet you at the coffee shop or in the library and you’d go over things with her again. Anika wasn’t sure what it was about you but the way you explained things to her made her retain them better. When the mid-term and final exam came around you spent every night for weeks over at her dorm helping her study. She wondered when you had time to study for yourself since you seemed so busy tutoring her, but audio seemed to come naturally to you. Every quiz or test you’d taken so far you aced while Anika passed.

Whenever there was a project or paper you had to write for class, you always worked with Anika. The teacher let them choose partners and you still chose Anika. She never knew why because there were other students who clearly had a passion for audio like you and who actually knew their stuff. Whenever you guys worked on something together it felt more like you doing the project, explaining it to Anika, and her just sitting there, getting credit for it. You assured her multiple times you didn’t see it that way.

As you two went through the semester together, you started hanging out more as friends and not just to help Anika pass the class. No matter what the two of you did though, you somehow managed to bring audio into it. You were such a nerd when it came to music and sound design, Anika couldn’t watch a movie without you commenting on the score. She learned that what you really wanted to do was the sound design for videogames, she also learned you didn’t shut up when the topic of your favorite videogame got brought up. She made the mistake of asking you what your favorite game was and ended up listening to you ramble about the music of The Last of Us for over an hour and then you made her listen to the entire soundtrack, then you made her listen to it again, but this time paused it to add your commentary.

Luckily, she was allowed to do the same though. Anika listened to you geek out about soundtracks and videogames while you listened to her about theater, the different plays, the different types of musicals. Whenever there was a new play in town that Anika wanted to see she would take you, since Mindy refused to go with her. Anika was always immersed during the play but after she spent the rest of the night talking about the lighting and how each scene was lit and the emotion that it invoked, if it was a musical then she would add a couple more hours, talking about how each performer sung the song and the music itself and how each song told the story.

“She seems really cool,” Chad said, bringing Anika out of her memories of you. “And you didn’t know about her and Tara?”

Anika shook her head. “Nope,” she answered. “I knew she shared a class with Mindy.”

“Script writing,” Mindy added. “She might be more into audio but she’s not half bad with storytelling in general.”

“And yet you still don’t like her.”

Mindy raised her hands in defense. “Can you blame me? Besides, with how well you get along I’m surprised you two weren’t dating before we met.”

Anika rolled her eyes at that. “She’s just my best friend,” Anika said, with a teasing smile.

“Whatever,” Mindy grumbled, crossing her arms.

“I think Tara has film history with her,” Anika said, turning back to Chad. “I forget who mentioned it first, but I remember them both knowing they had the class together. I didn’t think they knew each other though. Neither ever talked about the other.”

Anika was about to talk more about you when her phone vibrated. She quickly grabbed her phone, aware of Mindy and Chad both pulling out their phones as well. Sam had sent a group text saying you were alive but had been rushed into surgery and she and Tara were in the hospital waiting room. Anika shot off a quick text saying they were on their way. She was on her feet before Mindy and Chad had time to finish reading the text.

“Let’s go!” she snapped, gesturing for them to get up. They quickly got up, rushing to follow her out the door.

When they got to the hospital they ran through the white corridors until they got to the waiting room where they saw Sam and Tara sitting in two of the chairs. Tara had her feet pulled up onto the seat, her arms wrapped around her legs. Sam was sitting next to her, her hand rubbing up and down Tara’s back.

Anika walked over, giving Tara’s hand a comforting squeeze before taking a seat across from her with Mindy right behind her. Anika wanted to say something and ask what happened, she wanted to know how you were doing but she knew it wasn’t the time. All she knew was that you were still alive and that was the most important thing at the moment.

Anika intertwined her hand with Mindy’s and leaned her head on her shoulder. She refused to let her mind go to the worst-case scenario, you were alive, and you were in surgery, you’d be fine. Anika’s mind went through every interaction she had with you again. You had helped her so much in the first audio class that for the fall semester, you guys made your schedules together and signed up for audio 2 together. Anika had only known you for six months, the beginning of summer semester, the same amount of time as she’d known Mindy, but you had become such an integral part of her life, you were her best friend. You needed to live. Even if it was only so Anika could interrogate you about your relationship with Tara, she needed you to live.

After a few hours of waiting Anika had drifted off to sleep. She didn’t wake up until she heard a nurse say your name. She was on her feet and wide awake in an instant. She stood around the nurse with the others, she gripped Mindy’s hand tightly as they waited to hear the news.

“Is she okay?” Tara asked.

“Relation?” the nurse asked, looking up at Tara from her chart.

“She’s, my girlfriend.”

“She’s out of surgery and in a room recovering, you’re welcome to go see her.”

Anika let out a relieved sigh, you really were going to be okay. She loosened her grip on Mindy’s hand, then gave it a grateful squeeze.

“How is she?” Tara whispered.

The nurse sighed, putting down her chart. “She’s alive.” At hearing those words Tara let out a relieved sob. Anika couldn’t help the happy tears that started to fill her eyes. “Her left hand was practically shattered, and she’s got seven broken or cracked ribs.” Anika brought a hand to her mouth; you had endured so much. “It’ll take some time, but she’ll be okay,” she gave a kind smile to Tara then everyone else before walking away.

You were only allowed two visitors and as much as Anika wanted to see you, she knew Tara had to see you more and she knew Tara needed her sister by her side. Anika pulled Tara into a tight hug. She hugged Tara for a second longer, making up for the fact that she couldn’t hug you yet.

When Sam and Tara went to visit you everyone else re-took their seats. Anika grabbed the sandwich that Chad had brought her and took a bite, taking a sip of her juice as well. Anika was fully prepared to sleep in the hospital waiting room, but it wasn’t much long later when Sam came back down. Sam informed them that you looked beat up but okay considering what was done to you and you were still sleeping. She said her and Tara weren’t leaving but she wanted them to go back to the apartment or one of their dorms and rest.

Anika reluctantly let Mindy drag her out of the hospital and back to the apartment. The three of them stood in the apartment for about five minutes before Chad wandered off, filling a bag with spare clothes for the sisters. Anika then dragged Mindy to follow Chad back to the hospital to drop off the clothes. She knew it didn’t take three of them to drop off clothes but with Ghostface running around there was safety in numbers, plus she just wanted to be there in case there was any new information on you, even though she knew Sam would keep them informed.

The three of them decided to stay in the apartment, none of them had a big enough dorm room to fit three people. Besides Ethan was Chad’s roommate and they wanted to keep the people who knew what was going on to a minimum. Anika wasn’t sure where Quinn was during everything, her absence was suspicious, but it wasn’t uncommon. They had all been at a party and Ethan and Quinn both stayed behind. It wasn’t out of the ordinary for Quinn to go to a party and come home the next day or even a few days later if she was having a lot of fun with the guy she found.

Chad was snuggled up in the chair, a blanket draped over him while Mindy was curled up on the couch. Anika was sitting on the opposite end of the couch. She couldn’t sleep now that she knew you were alive, she was worried something else was going to happen. She watched a random movie that was playing on the TV with the sound on mute so as to not disturb the twins.

That’s how the next day went as well. Anika was exhausted from the lack of sleep and was getting by by taking quick powernaps. Mindy would flip through the channels to find mindless entertainment to fill the time and Chad would make them food. For breakfast it was simply eggs, for lunch it was chicken nuggets, and for dinner it was pizza. It was also simple food that was just frozen and tossed in the microwave, but Chad was the only one making sure everyone actually ate.

It was late at night again, the twins sleeping in the same position as they were the night before. Anika had a random movie playing on mute, but she wasn’t paying attention to it, she couldn’t even say what genre it was if someone asked. Her phone was sitting on the coffee table when it lit up. She lunged off the couch, grabbing her phone to see that it was a text from Sam, you were awake.

Anika jumped off the couch and was already putting on her shoes. “Get up!” she yelled. She grabbed Chad’s shoes, throwing them at him. He jolted awake, almost tipping the chair. “Y/N is awake, get up!” she said louder, tossing Mindy her shoes as well.

Though the twins were startled awake they both quickly got up, slipping on their shoes. Anika waited at the front door, tapping her foot as she shook her head, slowly watching them get ready. She clicked her phone to look at the time, a whole two minutes had passed since Sam sent that text. “Let’s go!” Anika’s grumpiness seeped into her voice. It got the other two moving though and next thing she knew they were walking out the front door.

They got to the hospital, meeting Sam in the waiting room. She told them once again that you were awake and talking with Tara. They all took seats in the waiting room again, Sam opting to wait with them so she could give you and Tara some privacy. Anika finally slept for the first time in two days, head on Mindy’s shoulder now that she knew you were awake.

In the morning they were all woken up by FBI agent Kirby Reed. She introduced herself to everyone but her and Sam clearly knew each other already. Kirby told them she investigated Ghostface attacks, since she was a survivor of the 2011 killings. Kirby had just got to town, and she heard about the attack, when she heard you were awake, she had come right over, wanting to talk to you. Sam took Kirby to show her to your room.

A few minutes later Sam came back down but she wasn’t alone, she was with Tara who had a determined look in her eye. Anika was actually scared by the look Tara held, it was dark, and it was what she imagined a killer to look like right before they went hunting.

“What’s going on?” Mindy asked.

“We’re going to kill this fucker,” Tara spit out.

Sam rested a gentle hand on Tara’s shoulder, trying to calm her down. “We have a plan.”

“Let’s go,” Chad said, jumping up from his seat.

“No. Just us.”

“Sam, you can’t take on Ghostface alone.”

“I can’t let any of you get hurt again, please stay here.”

While Sam argued with Chad and Mindy about whether they were coming or not Anika watched Tara. Tara didn’t look like she cared one way or another whether others joined them or not, all she wanted was to kill the bastard that hurt her girlfriend. When Tara noticed Anika watching her, her gaze softened and she stepped towards Anika, pulling her away from the others.

“Can I ask a favor?” Tara whispered, looking at Anika with wide eyes.

“Anything,” Anika said instantly.

“Can you stay with Y/N?”

“Of course.”

“Thank you. Just keep her distracted and don’t let her come after me.”

Anika let out a small chuckle. “Easier said than done. When she learns you’re not here she’s going to be pissed.”

“I know,” Tara whispered.

“Whatever, you’re going to be the one to deal with her wrath when you get back.”

For the first time in two days Anika saw Tara smile, it was a small smile, but it was a smile. “Happily.”

Anika made her way up to your room, leaving the others to continue arguing. She stood outside as she watched through the window. Agent Reed stood by your bedside as she talked to you. Kirby looked up, meeting Anika’s gaze and a minute later she was walking out of the room. Anika gave her a smile before entering your hospital room.

“Hey,” Anika whispered quietly.

“Hey,” you said, smiling at her before it quickly fell. “What are you doing here? Where’s Tara?”

“Wow, I’ll try not to be offended,” Anika chuckled. She moved to the seat closest to your bed. She was really hoping for a minute before you started questioning her.

“Nika,” you said, looking at her knowingly.

Anika sighed; she wasn’t lucky enough to make it a minute before she had to tell you. “You know where,” she said softly.

Your eyes fearfully darted all around the room before you tried to sit up. Anika quickly jumped up from her seat, resting a hand on your shoulder to push you back down. You instantly groaned, wincing in pain from the moving around.

“I have to stop her,” you said through gritted teeth.

“You know there’s no doing that,” Anika said.

“She could die!” you snapped. Anika jumped at your tone, though she knew you weren’t angry with her.

“She’s done this before,” Anika said. “And she has Sam with her. She also has a pretty strong motive to survive.”

“She better survive Ghostface cause when she gets back, I’m gonna kill her,” you grumbled.

Anika smiled at your words. “Don’t worry, she’s well aware.”

The two of you sat in silence for a minute. Anika watched you but you watched the door. Your eyes hadn’t left the door since Anika told you what Tara was doing. You were waiting for her to come back, and you weren’t going to take your eyes off the door until you saw Tara walking through.

“So,” Anika said, clapping her hands together. “Want to watch The Last of Us?” that got your attention, you slowly turned to give Anika a confused look. “You can tell me all the differences between the show and the game,” Anika tried to bribe. She grabbed a laptop they had brought over with the spare clothes.

“You’re trying to distract me,” you said, glancing at the laptop as Anika went and pulled up the show.

“And it’s working,” Anika smiled as she moved the chair even closer to your bedside.

“No, it’s not,” you grumbled.

“Look, you can either annoy me about all the differences between the show and the game or we can talk about how you’ve secretly been dating Tara.” Anika crossed her arms, raising an eyebrow.

You grumbled something incoherent before hitting play on the first episode. Anika smiled to herself, leaning back into the chair as she got ready to listen to you ramble. “This doesn’t get you out of telling me about Tara though,” Anika added.

You rolled your eyes, flicking a glare at Anika. As the show started your eyes instantly lit up. “So, right away it’s already different because in the game in opens with…” you started rambling. Anika was silently hoping Tara would be back before you finished all nine episodes.

Taglist: @bigbadsofty07 @fanboy7794 @noooodlessstuff @tatumrileyslover @alexkolax @canvascoloredin

#tara carpenter #tara carpenter x reader #tara carpenter x you #tara carpenter x fem reader #tara carpenter imagine #jenna ortega x reader #jenna ortega #anika kayoko #scream #scream 6 #scream vi #this isn't your fault

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babyangelsky · 6 months

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BL Challenge 2k24 ✨Day 7✨

Hello and welcome to @negrowhat's 15 Day BL Challenge! Full challenge can be found here.

Favorite Villain: Korn Theerapanyakul

It isn't often that we get an actual villain in a BL. We have plenty of love rivals but those are rarely ever villains in the true sense of the word. We also have a large, unfortunate array of shitty parents and parental figures, some of which absolutely do fall into the villain category, but they don't deserve my effort or your attention.

But then we have Korn.

Korn is a villain. Make absolutely no mistake about that. This man has dedicated his life to playing 4D chess with everyone around him, including and especially his sons, and he's brilliant at it. There is never a moment where he isn't in control, there is never a moment where he hasn't thought at least five steps ahead, and he has very few blind spots.

What gets me—and what makes him that much more insidious in my opinion—is how he presents himself to the world.

♡ gif by @guzhufuren from this set

"This man, a villain? Never! He's just a nice, soft-spoken dad in a sweater vest! Sure he's a bit intimidating but he's in the mafia, it's to be expected. And just look at how accepting he is of his gay sons! He's looking at a photo of his son and his son-in-law and smiling, isn't that lovely?"

False!

Korn's image is perfectly curated and if you only look on the surface, from the outside that's exactly what he is: a nice dad and a respectable businessman. He's rational, calm, and level-head, especially when you compare him to Gun—which you can't not do. It's impossible to have a conversation about Korn without talking about Gun, who is absolutely just as bad and who I easily could've chosen.

The difference is that Gun's evil is overt and in a way, it's more...honest because of it. He's not out here pretending to be a good person or trying to be anything other than exactly what he is. What you see is what you get. However, I chose Korn precisely because of that insidiousness, because his evil appears so much more subtle but only when it remains in the shadows.

♡ gif by @kinnbig from this set

Because when everything gets brought to light? Hoooooo BOY.

This man kept his foster sister in isolation under lock and key for years after he killed her husband and took her away from her two little boys. Then he left those little boys in the care of a degenerate gambler and watched them sink further and further into debt. And that's only the thin end of the wedge! If we got into all the ways he fucked up his OWN boys, we'd be here all damn day.

Kidnapping on perhaps more than one occasion, a hit squad, Kim's entire personality, Kinn's emotional range, need I go on?

But getting back to Porsche and Chay, Korn could've helped them at literally any point but he didn't lift a finger until they grew up and became useful to him. He could've cleared their debts, paid for Chay's education, provided for them, kept them from getting remotely close to a situation were men were beating them and trashing their home. But he did exactly none of that because whatever sense of obligation Korn might have felt toward them absolutely pales in comparison to his need for control.

♡ gif by @kinnbig from this set

That's what this all comes down to: control. The world is a chessboard and everyone in Korn's orbit is a piece on it. He proposed an outcome for himself and he got it.

He made sure Kinn was cemented as head of the main family and found a way to cement Porsche as head of the minor family. He got rid of Gun and the threat he presented and succeeded in burying the truth of what happened to Porsche's parents with him, because the truth that Korn gave simply is not the whole truth. It never will be because divulging the truth means giving up control, and that is something he will never do.

I could literally talk for hours about Korn. He's a fascinating character. He's got so many layers. Bottom line?

Este señor es el mismísimo diablo. This man is the living breathing devil.

#BLChallenge2k24 #korn theerapanyakul #kinnporsche

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spacebaby1 · 2 months

Note

Hello!. Keep up with the good posts, i really love them. 💕👍

How about a Ran x gf reader

Maybe her messing around with his baton while he isn't looking and accidentally hitting herself while pretending to beat up people. How is she going to explain to him what happened while he was out for a bit and sees the bruise on her forehead?. And her taking a long time to confess since she feels embarrassed for playing with it in the first place.

Enjoy!!

"I'll be heading out, darling," Ran reached to kidd your forehead from where he stood behind the couch. You nodded with a smile, "Call me if you need anything, okay, babe."

"I will babe! Take care Ran."

Usually you'd stay away from his 'work office' because you just don't want to mess around his things and make his work harder than it already is however today you were bored and nothing on you phone or the TV was entertaining so you decided to take a peek in his office maybe something fun there?

You know what he does for work, and he doesn't hide anything from you at all. Slowly opening the doors to his office, you entered, and a bunch of files were placed on the table alongside his laptop. You huffed as you walked around and noticed his signature weapon, his baton. A grin flashed on your lips as you grabbed the shiny baton; it was heavy, and you were surprised how Ran carried it around, swinging it like it's nothing more than a feather. You tried to swing it around, and it made you feel like you were powerful, running to grab one of Ran's blazer. you put it on and pretended to be him. Walking in the room as you swang the baton from side to side, pretending that question someone, "So tell me, Mr. Evil man, where is the money? I know you know about it," you pointed the baton to the empty spot in front of you and chuckled shaking your hair, "No no you don't fool me, you-" you were trying to place the baton on your shoulder but it hit you right on the face; on your forehead and left eye. "Son of a bitch!" You yelped in pain dropping the baton on the floor as you held your eye, "ouch! Ahhh, that hurt," you cried stamping your feet on the floor.

Making your way downstairs to the kitchen you grabbed the ice pack placing it on your eye and forehead as tears rolled down your face; you really had no one to blame, this is exactly why you don't mess around with things because of how clumsy you are. Falling on the couch, you sighed as your phone rang. It was Ran, "Hello, my princess, just calling to tell you that I might get home super late, okay darling?" You hummed in response, "everything alright, my princess?" You hummed again, "Yes love everything is fine, I love you." You heard him chuckle, "I love you more, princess."

A few hours later, the pain was slowing down, and you were finally able to breathe a little bit of relief. You went to the bathroom to wash your face for the day and the yelp you let out when you saw your reflection in the mirror was horrifying; your eyes was bruised and so was your forehead, a small bump had formed on your forehead turning all shades of grean and purple while your eyes looked like you've been punched. You groaned as you used all the ice in the freezer to make the bruises heal, but it was no good. You knew Ran would probably laugh at you if he saw you. You were in the kitchen when you heard the front door open and shut, "shit!" You whispered before running to the bathroom. "Baby? I'm home!" You heard Ran's voice echo in, and you hissed at the sight of your in the bathroom mirror and heard his footsteps, "princess? Are you in the bathroom?" He knocked the door, and you cursed quietly, "Ah, yes, Ran. I'll be out soon. You said you'll be late?" You opened your hair, dropping your bangs as much as you could hide the bump and the bruise. "Yeah, Rindou took over the rest of the work, I brought dinner come out so we can eat, baby. I wanna kiss my princess, I missed you so much, Baby?"

"Yeah, let me just wash my hands," you replied, making sure your face was hidden before you left the bathroom. You faked a yawn as you left the bathroom and Ran met you in the hallway reaching for a hug and you Usually wait for his kiss on you forehead but today you just hugged his quickly and dodged his kiss and let go of his hug the moment you hugged him, "did you just dodge my kiss, princess?" He followed after you grabbing your hand, pulling you to him, but you won't look at him. His brows frowned when he noticed you were hiding your face from him. Which immediately sent a warning in his mind, "Hey, Sweetie? What's wrong? Did I do something? You're not looking at me." You tried to move your face every time he tried to look at it from any side, "what? No? Let's go ea-"

"Hey, baby." He grabbed your hand and pulled you to his chest before carefully placing his hands on your cheeks, and you hissed, "What baby! You are scaring me wh-AHH WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR EYE! OH MY, BABY! WHO HURT YOU?" He was panicking at the sight of your face, bruised, his eyes scanning your eye and forehead, "WHO DID THIS? WHAT HAPPENED?" His immediate response was to softly kiss your face where it wasn't hurt. He thought someone had hurt you, and he wasn't there to protect you. As you watched him placing kisses on your face asking you about who hurt you and you could feel his heart beating fast since you had your hands on his chest. "No one, Ran, honey. No one hurt me. Please calm down, your hearts beating so fast." You placed your head on his chest. He placed his hand on the side of your head, "Then what happened? Your face is all bruised!" You chuckled awkwardly as you pulled away, rubbing the back of your head you spoke feeling embarrassed, "well, I kinda got carried away playing with your baton and well, i kinda slapped myself with it, ACCIDENTALLY! I'm sorry I shouldn't be playing around with your weap-"

"You almost gave me a heart attack, my princess. Does it still hurt? That damn baton I'm gonna throw it away, how reckless of me to leave it around like that, fuck I'm such an idiot." He groaned and you took his hands in yours making his look at you. "Baby, it's my fault not yours, don't call yourself idiot. I'm the one who went snooping in your office, I'm so sorry, are you mad?" He sighed carefully cupping your face and leaning to your level, "I'm not mad my princess. I'm so freaking worried, are you in pain? Come on I'll take you to the hospital." He grabbed your hand and you followed behind, "I'll be fine. Few more ice packs and i-"

"No, princess, what if you got a concussion or internal bleeding? I'm making sure you're safe and sound or I'll die of worry." You chuckled at how worried he was getting, and yet here you thought he'll laugh at you for getting a bump with the baton.

#ran tokyo revengers #ran haitani x you #ran haitani x reader #ran haitani #ran headcanons #ran haitani x y/n

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mono-dot-jpeg · 10 months

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stop playing league - k. kenma

summary; a callout to me and my fellow league players. (not league enjoyers. players.)

genre/extra tags; one shot(?)/drabble, fluff, comedy, slight crack, kenma (kind of) slanders riot games and you, relationship unestablished and unmentioned, if you know the games cool (i hate valorant), self indulgent

[can be interpreted as romantic or platonic] [gender never mentioned] [i make many references to different games and use game terms, sorry]

word count; 489

a/n; no one except for league players can make fun of league in this post now, i make the rules and enforce them. (/hj) you ever think abt the difference between making fun of your favorite things and someone else doing it? yeah it's like that basically. i genuinely like the characters league has to offer, but people always think i like the game. (i play it but i usually end up hating most sessions)

"don't you dare hit that button."

your cursor hovers over the fated "find match" button. the button that has been torturing you for at least a few hours now. your dying urge to play "one more game" has you in a chokehold when you just want to win once.

"kenma..." you whine. the pudding head is playing a much more chill game compared to yours, which was slime rancher. it was a little bit nerve-wracking with how easily he almost slipped off ledges, deal with the occasional tarr slime, or the adorably angry slimes in certain paths. but nonetheless, it's a much healthier game to play than league. "it's not like i can even play slime rancher with you, it's not multi-player. just let me have this. i'm gonna win this time. surely. i'll switch to val after this, promise."

"you still won't be playing with me because i don't play valorant." you can imagine his cat-like glare staring at you through the screen. "and you rarely play tft and legends of runeterra."

"it gets me dizzy, alright?! and also you should know how painful it is to get those annoying people who hold my three stars from me!" you pause when he mentions the card game, "the card game isn't that bad. just not my favorite. what about overwatch?"

"isn't the new hog rework annoying?"

"that's... it's something. what about plate up?"

"you're gonna rage."

"stardew?"

"you're too lazy to update your mods."

"shut the fuck up, actually." you hissed at him as he huffs out a laugh. "i'm waiting for the next update. i think everyone is at this point."

"literally play anything but league for fucks sake, y/n."

"but cute neeko skin.." you pretend to cry, "i just want to play my sillies. maybe even win a game, dare i say." you angrily wave your mouse over your screen. kenma watches your screen share, unamused.

"you spent money on that skin."

"WRONG, I SPENT MONEY ON ONE OVERWATCH SKIN AND TWO BATTLEPASSES."

"still spent money."

"that's a lot of backtalk coming from you. you buy skins and dlc too. you're not clean either." despite kenma trying to prolong the inevitable, you click "find match" and sit back and wait as kenma groans in annoyance. "your signs can't stop me because i can't read." you read the burst of notifications in discord of kenma and your friends making fun of you for even playing league willingly. "fuck y'all. god forbid, i have a hobby." you huffed.

"it's league."

"just let me play my silly champions in peace, kenma! you don't see me judging you for picking sebastian every stardew save!"

"he's not even that bad!"

"you always steal him from me!"

"you don't deserve him!"

"fuck you!"

a blanket of silence falls over you both as you end your silly bickering.

"you wanna play a pokemon soul link run after your match?"

"fuck you, yeah i do."

#haikyuu kenma kozume #kenma kozume x reader #kozume kenma x reader #haikyuu kenma #kenma x reader #kozume kenma #haikyuu kenma x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x gender neutral reader #haikyuu x male reader

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fanfiction101 · 6 months

Text

Jareth x fem!reader

Hey this is an impulse post. It's a bit short but whatever. Enjoy and love you!

Warning:fluff fluff fluff fluffy FLUFF

"Come on Jareth! I don't want to wait any longer. I swear you focus more on your hair than a 15 year old girl." I said as I waited by the doors of the castle.

I held in my hand a wicker basket filled with food I had made earlier with plates and utensils as well as a picnic blanket.

"I'm on my way down!" Jareth called from a grand staircase. "What's your rush anyways? It isn't like we are going to be late." He said coming down the stairs.

He was dressed more casually for the occasion. Every once in a while, I am able to convince Jareth to leave his position as king at least for a few hours to travel to the countryside and have a picnic. At first, Jareth would pretend that he doesn't enjoy them, but I know he loves them. I even catch him asking about when I want to do it again. He always says it's to "plan a schedule". Since when is my husband so meticulously organized?

"Well, I am just excited. It'll be fun." I said stepping toward him as he steps onto the final floor.

"Yeah it'll be fun cleaning up whatever mess the damn goblins made." Jareth said sarcastically.

"I'm sure that Hoggle will have it all undercontrol. Besides, after numerous threats to any goblins who step put of line, I'm sure not much will happen." I reassured him.

He held out his arm and I took it graciously as we walked towards a white carnage with a goblin driver. Jareth opened the door for as I got in and he soon after followed.

After a short ride, we arrived at our usual spot. It was a grassy keadow with hundred of flowers. There an edge of a forrest with a babbling stream nearby. The sun was shining, creating the air nice and warm but not humid.

We got out and Jareth ordered the goblin to pick us up in 4 hours and we watched at the carriage slowly went away.

I turned towards Jareth and sighed. "Well, shall we, my king?"

Jareth smiled, "We shall, my queen." I set up the blanket while Jareth got out he plates and such. While we ate, we chatted about how things were in the kingdom and told stories about before we met.

Soon we were full and we put the plates, forks, and leftovers back in the basket. Maybe it was the sugar from the large cupcake I had or the sunshine or maybe both, but I felt hyper and giddy.

I smiled as an idea popped into my head. I took Jareths hand and said, "Come on! I want to show you something."

I led him towards the stream. I told him to look closely as I pointed out a rock underneath the flowing water. As he leaned closer to the water, my hand went up and splashed water in his face.

I began to laugh so hard because his face was priceless.

"Oh so you want to play that game, hm? Take this!" He said playfully as he tried to push me into the stream.

Unfortunately for him, I grabbed onto his shirt and brought him down with me. As we resurfaced I said in a mocking tone, "So you want to play this game, hm?"

Jareth scoffed a splashed water at me and I splashed back. Eventually our arms grew tired so we stepped out of the river and laid down to dry our selves out in the sun.

#jareth the goblin king #goblin king #labyrinth #labyrinth fanfiction #the labyrinth #jareth imagine #jareth the goblin king x reader #jareth x you #jareth x reader

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atelierlili · 4 months

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Katniss, Peeta, and the messy in between.

For a while I've been seeing the sentiment of blaming the distance between Katniss and Peeta after the 74th games on Peeta entirely and I think it's rather unfair. It's a messy situation involving two teenagers who are both valid in their feelings at this point in time.

There's multiple things going on at the end of book 1 in regards to Peeta's relationship with both Katniss AND Haymitch that it feel unfair to blame him, when Peeta, like Katniss, more often than not, is the last one to find out other people's intentions/plans, even from his own allies.

Now before I start, I feel like I must preface this by saying I'm not bashing anyone in this analysis so if you're gonna say something rude and mean about my babies, make that U turn cause I aint having it. Also I'm a yapper so this is gonna be really long lol.

It begins on the train tracks. Katniss and Peeta are walking along the tracks when Peeta picks her a small bouquet of wildflowers as Katniss is struggling to convey the kind of danger they are in, while also being paranoid that they're being watched. At this time, she also connects Gale to the wild flowers Peeta has picked for her and its adding her anxiety to the point where she can't even pretend to be happy at Peeta's gift. And that's something he picks up on.

When the train makes a brief stop for fuel, we’re allowed to go outside for some fresh air. There’s no longer any need to guard us. Peeta and I walk down along the track, hand in hand, and I can’t find anything to say now that we’re alone. He stops to gather a bunch of wildflowers for me. When he presents them, I work hard to look pleased. Because he can’t know that the pink and-white flowers are the tops of wild onions and only remind me of the hours I’ve spent gathering them with Gale.

“What’s wrong?” Peeta asks. “Nothing,” I answer. We continue walking, past the end of the train, out where even I’m fairly sure there are no cameras hidden in the scrubby bushes along the track. Still no words come. -THG - Chapter 27

Its not until Haymitch appears and drop the bomb and bows out that Peeta finally catches on that Katniss and Haymitch are still playing up the lover act without his knowledge.

Haymitch startles me when he lays a hand on my back. Even now, in the middle of nowhere, he keeps his voice down. “Great job, you two. Just keep it up in the district until the cameras are gone. We should be okay.” I watch him head back to the train, avoiding Peeta’s eyes. “What’s he mean?” Peeta asks me. “It’s the Capitol. They didn’t like our stunt with the berries,” I blurt out. “What? What are you talking about?”

“So, what you’re saying is, these last few days and then I guess . . . back in the arena . . . that was just some strategy you two worked out.” “No. I mean, I couldn’t even talk to him in the arena, could I?” I stammer. “But you knew what he wanted you to do, didn’t you?” says Peeta. I bite my lip. “Katniss?” He drops my hand and I take a step, as if to catch my balance. “It was all for the Games,” Peeta says. “How you acted.”

-THG - Chapter 27

The truth comes out. Uh oh. It seems this star crossed lovers act when on longer than Peeta expected. Granted, I don't recall him or Katniss ever making their status official, but somewhere between the cave and now, Peeta thought both him and Katniss were on the same page about their feelings. He's not wrong for thinking Katniss liked him back, she does, what he didn't account for is Katniss not knowing herself that she liked him back.

I think Peeta learning the truth through Haymitch and not Katniss starts them on the wrong foot. Because she isn't honest with him for a majority of the time in this scene. Yes, Katniss was worried if the capitol could hear them, but even after Haymitch lets them know they can talk freely, she's still isn't 100% honest with Peeta.

Now here comes the big question.

“It was all for the Games,” Peeta says. “How you acted.” “Not all of it,” I say, tightly holding on to my flowers. “Then how much? No, forget that. I guess the real question is what’s going to be left when we get home?” he says. “I don’t know. The closer we get to District Twelve, the more confused I get,” I say. He waits, for further explanation, but none’s forthcoming

I'd be more than happy to dump all the blame on him for being a pissy baby after the revelation if it weren't for that last part at the end.

Peeta's hurt, yes, but he can rationalize that Katniss had to play lovers for the games, but here, right now, he's asking what he should be expecting when they get home. The words aren't there, but the subtext is loud and clear.

This is a confession. I'm hurt. But I still like you. Do you like me? Will we have something when we go home and the cameras are gone?

Katniss gives him her most honest answer yet. She doesn't know. She's confused and she's getting more confused as they get closer to home. And that's it. That's her answer. But it isn't enough.

Peeta explicitly waits for more of an explanation from Katniss. He hears nothing about her thoughts, feelings, fears. He only knows what she tells him. And when he doesn't get it, there's no other way to take it as a rejection.

So now what?

“Well, let me know when you work it out,” he says, and the pain in his voice is palpable. -THG- Chapter 27-

“No, I ate at the Hob,” I say. “But thank you.” My voice doesn’t sound like my own, it’s so formal. Just as it’s been every time I’ve spoken to Peeta since the cameras finished filming our happy homecoming and we returned to our real lives. -CF- Chapter 1

The camera crews and reporters packed up and went home. Peeta and I assumed the cool relationship we’ve had ever since. -CF- Chapter 2

And this is why I feel like it's so unfair to solely blame Peeta for their distance between THG and CF. This distance came from both sides.

Peeta ends Book one asking Katniss to be honest with him once she figures her own feelings out. But she never does. She just picks up her life and tries go back to what it was before the games.

Was he waiting for an answer? How long did he wait? When did he give up and accept that whatever was the 74th was something his mind made up while he lying half dead in a cave?

Katniss has a valid list of a million things that are clouding her feelings for Peeta. We know them because we're stuck in her head. But Peeta isn't. And to be honest, I don't think he ever knows all of them throughout the trilogy.

I want to tell him that he’s not being fair. That we were strangers. That I did what it took to stay alive, to keep us both alive in the arena. That I can’t explain how things are with Gale because I don’t know myself. That it’s no good loving me because I’m never going to get married anyway and he’d just end up hating me later instead of sooner. That if I do have feelings for him, it doesn’t matter because I’ll never be able to afford the kind of love that leads to a family, to children. And how can he? How can he after what we’ve just been through? -THG- Chapter 27-

And this isn't a silly little fling for Peeta. He's liked Katniss since forever. Has there been other girls that caught his eye? Yes, maybe, but Katniss Everdeen has always been a soft spot for him.

Now, there is a part of him that now as to wonder WTF was going on in the Games, in the Cave and the Interview that followed after. You know the one, where Katniss cries into his chest, buries her face into his chest and practically sits on him the entire time.

Unlike Katniss, Peeta now has to question everything because the rug has just been pulled from underneath him. Yes, he's aware about the lover act and playing it up for the audience, but he isn't aware that Katniss and Haymitch have some crazy telepathic connection to each other that was guiding how Katniss would act towards Peeta in the games. He was even delirious half the time. How far did that go? When did it even begin? He knew that Haymitch was sending packages to Katniss instead of him.

I'm not making this shit up because it's the one thing that Peeta outwardly expresses frustration at (especially) Katniss and Haymitch.

“This has to stop. Right now. This — this — game you two play, where you tell each other secrets but keep them from me like I’m too inconsequential or stupid or weak to handle them.” “It’s not like that, Peeta —” I begin. “It’s exactly like that!” he yells at me. “I have people I care about, too, Katniss! Family and friends back in District Twelve who will be just as dead as yours if we don’t pull this thing off. So, after all we went through in the arena, don’t I even rate the truth from you?” - CF - Chapter 5 -

So what is the point i'm making here? Oh right. I think Peeta is 1000% justified in withdrawing from Katniss after the train tracks. What else is he suppose to do? This isn't something he can bounce back and recover from right away. Taking a step back is the most mature thing to do in this situation. For his sake and hers.

I dislike the notion that his apology denotes complete wrong doing on his part. He's having a human moment and he navigates it better than most would. Yes, he freezes her out, but he doesn't berate her, blame her or is mean to her. He just fucks off and deals with his own emotions and only shows up to play the perfect boyfriend. (And when he does, he never does it with malice OR resentment, at least to from Katniss' obervation.) What other alternative is there? He's genuinely hurt and I feel like expecting him to be comforting and supportive on and off camera when he's hurting inside to be unfair.

We sympathize with Katniss because we're in her head 24/7. We can get to hear her yearn and pine for Peeta after the train tracks. But Katniss also just doesn't mention her every trying to fix her relationship with Peeta between books. She lets the ice freeze over until Peeta comes back to ofter friendship instead. Yes, she has trauma and more hang ups than the average modern day person, but so does Peeta. Trauma is an explanation, not an excuse. If Katniss is allowed three books to figure out her feelings for Peeta, Peeta should be allowed the in between of Book 1 and 2 to figure out his with Katniss.

There should be more nuance when we look at this point in time where Peeta and Katniss' relationship is estranged. Peeta has a lot of reasons why he might want distance from her and I think it's unfair to blame him for it. From him questioning the games, Katniss and Haymitch's involvement with each other and Katniss non-answer of a rejection to his feelings, there's a lot of things he needs to sort out himself. Yes, she saved his life, but she also doesn't answer a lot of questions he asks of her. Katniss doesn't owe him a relationship for what happened in the games, or even her reasons why she's not ready for a relationship. But in turn, we shouldn't blame Peeta if he personally needs time to pick himself up, to figure things out himself. And this is just one thing on top of the trauma that follows both of them after the games. He also just fucking lost his leg LMAO

#THG from Peeta's point of view is mostly him being unintentionally gaslit by everyone #including himself #I was on reddit and I kept seeing people bring up Peeta icing Katniss out after being rejected and blaming it on him #and it was erking me #and I know it's partly because Peeta is mostly flawless as character in Katniss' eyes and they're looking for his flaws #but I think its because they both like each other and they bring the best out each other #I actually think this estrangement is wonderfuly crafted by Suzzane #everlark #katniss everdeen #peeta mellark #the hunger games #thg #ramblings of a madwoman #I might have poke the bear with this one #oh well

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eldritch-spouse · 1 year

Note

Hi Pinnie! Chopping block anon here again! Could we fill this prompt with Santi or Ludwig? I'm banging my head on the nearest wall, I can't choose. Honestly, I know I'll love whatever you end up writing. 😍

How would any of the TCE gang react to finding the object of their obsession (that they'd been actively trying to keep away from the Clergy) on Morrel's chopping block? :o

[Ludwig isn't really a current part of TCE, so I'm going with good old Santi. Also, I feel that this isn't where you wanted it to go, but I got a few thoughts along the way. Fem reader.]

TW: Nonconsensual hypnotism; Implied nonconsensual sharing.

He knew something was up when you didn't so much as answer a morning text.

You need time alone. All humans do. He thought he would too when he would occasionally -Very rarely- Humor the thought of a relationship. But something didn't sit right with Santi when hours passed and you gave him nothing, absolute radio silence- When you're usually so talkative, even in your moodiest days, you'll at least bother to call him a pervert.

The incubus supposes he ought to keep himself busy for a bit before persisting again. He knows he's... A little too eager for contact, and that can naturally irk you. Maybe one day of relative silence might make you trust him more.

The demon has been making the rounds through most of The Clergy's floor for the entire night, restless in his pursuit of clientele, in a desperate effort to get his mind off you. Really, Santi has made more than enough money to honestly call it a day- The crowds are well-entertained and buzzing with a healthy amount of titillation, all is well.

Except he's not quite satisfied. He's in a foul mood honestly. Sometimes it would show on his sculped features as he pleasured those keening beneath him, nothing he couldn't wave aside or fluster out of their minds if they did notice.

He can't quite tell what brings him to the restaurant. Sure, he loves the dirty little thrill of sliding his hand down the table cloth and making someone loll their tongue out with pleasure while they pretend to eat, but most people here don't really have their minds on sex. They're harder catches, essentially.

And yet, when Santi passes by the main kitchen doors, a sound makes him halt. Not just any sound, a squeal. That by itself is no motive to stall, the incubus is well aware Morell loves his job, loves butchering, that he often takes the time to play with his food

-Like the dirty little fuck he is, sticking his fingers everywhere and bending helpless humans onto his cock, like toys, like fuckmeat. A depraved lunatic, pleasant company in Santi's opinion-

But, for some reason, the incubus is sure he recognizes that squeal from somewhere. It could be mere witless paranoia, but the echo of it in his mind doesn't let his feet unroot from their spot, so he figures he might as well check for himself. A dark hand knocks playfully on the heavy kitchen doors, receiving no immediate reply.

" Morell? " He tries.

There's some shuffling, then an eventual. " ... 'M busy! "

Yeah, "busy". Maybe balls deep in one of them already.

" Oh I'll be quick, dear- Just one peek, yes? "

More shifting and another stressed noise he could swear sounds a little too familiar, rubs him the wrong way, before something that sounds a lot like "piss off" gets mumbled back to him.

Typical.

That's why Santi only sighs before parting said doors and quietly weaseling inside.

The bobbles racing around only wave at him before buzzing around in their tasks, giving the demon a decent berth and easily circumventing him. As usual, they're completely unbothered by what their boss is up to.

The salacious, mischievous expression the incubus used in preparation to excuse himself to the chef dies as soon as his eyes scroll up to the chopping table.

Now is the time to pat himself in the back for listening to his gut, because none other than you, his darling minx, lie sprawled on that metal rectangle, like no more than a slab of meat. Your top has been torn off, pieces of it messily fashioned into a blindfold and gag. Morell stands with one hand on your thigh and the other tight around the handle of his cleaver.

Something inside him boils hotter than the rifts of Wrath. By the way you struggle in your binds, it's more than clear you're not enjoying a second of it, and Santi almost wants to believe Morell didn't intentionally seek you out. He's never been that nefarious, that putrid. To provoke the demon he works with.

He couldn't. Not when Santi never even introduced you to his coworkers. They only know your first name and vague descriptions of your face, your hair... That's not enough for someone he works with to miraculously hunt you down.

" Tha Hell did ah say?! Ya- "

" Where did you get that one? "

Santi almost doesn't recognize his own tone, and apparently, it gives the shroom monster pause too. Morell notices something's amiss, he's clever enough to notice the tense state the concubus is in, eyes glowing brighter at each passing second, deceptively still, one wrong answer away from perhaps impulsively starting a fight.

Morell looks at the human woman on his table, then back to Santi. " ... Tha fuck are ya on 'bout? "

" Where. Did you get that one? "

The chef's hand moves to your bare stomach, keeping you from squirming off the cold surface easily while he shifts to face his coworker better.

" Tha usual, Santi. I ain't been havin' time ta hunt 'em on mah own. " He shrugs. " Suppliers. "

The demon continues to glare at the blue monster for a long pause, finding no hint of a lie on those odd eyes. Only confusion and the remnants of exhilaration from what he was previously up to. This calms Santi a great deal. It was just a freak accident, yes? He let his favorite fox run a little too close to home, and she got snatched up... The incubus doesn't even want to think about what would happen if he hadn't come here in this exact nick of time.

Was it a silent nudge from Krulu? No. No, of course not, that's laughable- The lord of this pit spares no empathy for frivolities like their workers' love lives. Still, some unknowable force capable of penetrating the fog of this Clergy steered him well tonight.

Had this been no one of interest, the incubus would have still mauled the perpetrator to a pulp, if only just to prove a point. Or to thrill himself a little. But this is different. Very different. He can make the most out of it if he plays his cards right.

Santi shakes his head, then advances on the pair, unbothered by Morell's defensive puffing.

" You ought to start checking your stock more thoroughly. And not just their orifices. " He teases.

There's an eye roll. " Oh, tha's real fuckin' rich comin' from ya. "

He knows.

Nevertheless, Santi only smiles a little before hooking his claws into the waistband of your pants, grabbing your panties as well, before quickly pulling the fabric down. The newly revealed skin bares a jet black mark that is, by now, unmistakable to anyone who works with Santi. A concubus mark. His mark, elegantly claiming your most intimate parts for himself.

His claws tap idly on the meat of your hips as he watches the chef's face freeze, eyes widening.

" This one belongs to me. "

Silence. You wriggle and sob behind the gag.

" Shit. "

" Yeah. "

" I thought ah... Checked that one. "

The cook looks torn. There's some manner of guilt and cringing written on that darkened complexion, he clearly doesn't intend to continue this, but there's also some selfish sort of turmoil in his body language. As if he's upset he started the process and is now going to have a "pig" taken from his hands.

Santi's smile turns into a disgusting grin when a lightbulb casts complete depravity into his mind's eye. Your mark starts glowing, heating, and your struggling is rapidly paused. Morell squints.

" Hm, but what were you up to just now? "

The shroom hesitates, making some manner of motion with his dominant hand, which clutches his favored piece of sharp equipment.

Santi clicks this tongue. " Nice try. Before that. "

You start wriggling beneath the bigger monster's palm. It's no longer the jerking of a panicked figure trying desperately to escape, but a restless sort of agony. Morell's fuse lights up under the perceived scrutiny.

" Where tha fuck are ya goin' with this?! "

Santi arches a brow.

A quick glance flickers over your form. Today has been exceedingly traumatizing for you, the demon doesn't need to be in your shoes to know that. No one makes it out of Morell's kitchen, and if they do, they'll never be the same. You don't belong in The Clergy, not yet at least, and Santi knows that even with your currently arousal-fried brain, you're going to remember the events of today for the rest of your life- Something he can't allow to happen.

Fortunately, he knows someone who can just... Eat this unfortunate day out of your long term memory.

And, since you're not going to recall a lick of it, why not make this interesting?

What you don't know can't hurt you.

The incubus hums a wordless tune, pulling your remaining clothes down your legs, an easy task, your overheated body yearns to bare itself, he barely has to do anything. Once you're bare, Santi moves to the other side of the table, where your head rests, and starts undoing your blindfold.

Morell grumbles something incomprehensible and he snorts.

" Relax. Why would I stop you from pleasuring my minx? " Santi all but purrs.

" Yer real fuckin' weird. " Morell offers after an incredulous pause. " This ain't rubbin' ya tha wrong way? "

" Oh this is rubbing me all sorts of ways, Mori. "

" Gross- "

" You're hard. " The chef's protests are swiftly silenced. " I can't blame you. She's irresistible, isn't she? "

Morell crosses spotted arms over his chest and casts his eyes away. " She's uh... She's real purtty. "

That's one way to put it.

Santi chuckles when the torn cloth comes off, revealing a flustered, disoriented face. Your eyes glaze deliciously, pupils dilated in want as they surf between him and the blue monster, the mark's hunger going full throttle on your poor organism. The magic of a high-ranker is one Hell of a drug, isn't it? You make a desperate, muffled noise.

" There there, I'm here. You'll be taken care of soon. " He lulls, voice dipping in pitch just to make you shiver. Your head is lovingly raised so you can properly view the other. " That there is my friend. You wouldn't mind playing with him a bit, would you, love? "

Predictably, you nod enthusiastically, going as far as to part your legs in your stupor. Slick gathers excessively on your already stimulated pussy.

" Go on, Morell. "

Said monster gulps behind his thick scarf, drool clinging to his teeth at the lurid encouragement of his fiendish coworker, his fingers already itching to reach out and do as he pleases.

" Show us what you do with your piggies. "

#Santi oc #Morell oc #yandere monster #yandere teratophilia

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steddieas-shegoes · 1 year

Note

if youre still doing the headcanons- "what is he doing here?"

Steve hadn't seen Eddie in two years. Hadn't talked to him in nearly three. He'd worked pretty hard to not have to hear anything about him or see any news about him for most of that time, too.

So when he sees him sitting on Dustin's couch, lounging, as if he belongs there, he gets a little pissed.

"What is he doing here?" He asks Dustin through gritted teeth.

Dustin failed to mention that anyone else would be at his house for their monthly dinner, let alone that Eddie would be here.

That Eddie was even back in Hawkins.

Eddie overheard him, sitting up on the couch quickly and staring at them both.

"Eddie's in town to visit with Wayne and he stopped by to say hi."

"And he's leaving?"

Eddie looked down at the floor.

Was he...sad? He looked sad.

Steve refused to care, he couldn't care. Not with how Eddie left.

No note, no phone call, just an apology through Dustin as if he should have ever been put in the middle of whatever they had.

But if he was this sad, maybe something was wrong with Wayne? Steve admittedly hadn't checked in with him in a few months, his questioning about what happened between them often leaving him feeling drained.

"No, he's not leaving." Dustin looked between them with an angry glare. "Neither of you are leaving actually. Not until you at least talk about things like adults. You don't have to be friends or whatever, but you damn sure can't keep doing what you're doing. Steve's miserable, Eddie's pretending he isn't. Fix it before we all tie you down and make you."

"Dust-"

"No!" Dustin held his hand up as Eddie tried to speak. "Fix it. I'm going to call Suzie and when I come back, you better at least be able to look at each other."

The next few minutes were silent. Awkward.

Painful.

He noted every physical change in Eddie, saw how thin he was, how the dark circles under his eyes had somehow gotten worse despite the fact that he'd left to make it big and succeeded. He should be happy.

He should be thriving.

He got everything he wanted.

He left Steve behind so he could.

"I guess we should at least talk a little," Eddie finally said, voice much quieter than Steve had ever heard it before.

"Sure."

Steve sat on the other end of the couch from Eddie, looked straight ahead so he could avoid making eye contact.

"I don't know if you keep up with me or anything-"

"I don't."

It was harsh, harsher than Steve actually meant to be. He saw Eddie flinch out of the corner of his eye, resisted the urge to apologize.

"Um. Okay, yeah. Makes sense." Eddie sighed. "I'm kind of. Okay, so I'm in Hawkins for more than just visiting Wayne."

"Okay."

"I'm here because the label isn't happy with my writer's block and they told me to take a couple months and write an album or they'll consider the contract voided."

"Mhm."

Eddie was bouncing his leg, an old anxious habit that clearly hasn't gone away.

"I'm hoping being back here will help. But I also just. I want to spend time with the people I care about. I miss everyone."

"Yeah, I bet."

"I miss you."

Steve's head turned to see Eddie looking at him, unshed tears building in his eyes.

"Eddie-"

"I know I have no right to say it. Or to even be here. I didn't just leave you, I left everyone. And I barely gave any explanation and I've barely kept in touch with anyone except Wayne and Dustin because I'm scared. I'm so overwhelmed all the time and I have so much pressure on me and I didn't want any of that I just wanted to make music and see the world. I haven't slept more than a few hours in two years. When I told our manager, he said to start taking cocaine. Taking it! Like it's medication! And I did actually use it a few times to stay awake. I hate it, hate the way I feel after, but it was that or fall asleep during photoshoots. And this sounds like I'm whining, but I'm just trying to keep it together long enough to make sure Wayne doesn't see how much I hate this and how much I just want to be here playing music at stupid bars and going fishing with him even though I hate fishing and playing D&D with the guys and kissing you."

Steve was biting back his own tears as Eddie's fell.

No matter what, no matter how he felt, no matter what Eddie had done to hurt him, it still hurt to see someone he loved hurting like this.

And wasn't that a thought.

He knew he still loved Eddie, he always would.

He just didn't think he would ever have to face it head on like this.

"Eddie, I." Steve cleared his throat. "I'm sorry things aren't what you wanted, but. I can't. I can't let you in again. I spent a year trying to tell myself you'd be back. A year watching your every move in newspapers and tv interviews. Waiting for the day you'd mention me or come visit and apologize for leaving like you did. But you didn't and I had to accept that. I had to force myself to believe that you didn't care because thinking that you did hurt worse. I couldn't love you the way I wanted to, so I had to tell myself you didn't love me, even though I'm pretty sure you did. I'm pretty sure you still do. But it wasn't enough then and it wouldn't be enough now, and I can't let myself settle for not enough. I've done it before, you know how that fucked me up. I can't let it happen again."

Eddie nodded once, then stood up.

He was leaving again, Steve knew it.

But then, Eddie sunk to his knees in front of Steve, placed his shaking hands on Steve's knees.

"If you tell me to stay, I will."

"Eddie-"

"No. Please. Tell me to stay. I don't want to go back and I need you to tell me to stay. Even if you never talk to me again, I need you to be the reason I give the guys when I tell them I can't do it anymore. They'll understand if it's you. They always knew it would be you."

"Stay. You need to stay."

Eddie sobbed as he dropped his head down, resting his forehead against Steve's knee.

Steve placed a hand on the back of his head, biting back a sob as Eddie's hands squeezed his legs.

Steve couldn't do this right now, he didn't think Eddie could either. Emotions were too high, Dustin was in the room down the hall, and Steve knew there would be yelling, and crying, and words said that might lead to regret.

But it was something to have Eddie here, something to have him begging for Steve to be the one to tell him to stay, something to know that Eddie missed him the way Steve missed them.

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #headcanon #drabble #dustin henderson #angst with a hopeful ending #this got long #oops

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carboardserpent · 10 months

Note

Next gen headcanons? 🤔

Like, Jackson, Cruz, Tim, Danny, Chase, and Ryan?

Oh boy, that's a few characters. Alright, strap in then. Probably also gonna throw in Bubba because he's my favourite non-main next gen <3

(Humanised, as always)

(Quick disclaimer for this one, none of these are supposed to reflect on the irl racers that gave their names and voices to them - I'm treating these characters as though they're entirely fictional and not based on/inspired by real people. I make my HCs literally just based on Vibes (and RPs))

Jackson Storm:

6'1 and fit AF. Clearly spends a lot of time in the gym toning his body and muscles. He is male model levels of gorgeous. Physically flawless black man <3

Short black dreadlocks dyed blue at the ends.

Aromantic (female-leaning)bisexual.

Autistic.

Ray knew he was autistic before Jackson even knew himself, and is the reason he even got diagnosed in the first place.

One of his most common complaints is still about the reflections of the sun glinting in his eyes. The loud noise of the track still gets to him occasionally, but he has special earplugs to help him deal with it.

Can usually be seen drinking a can of IGNTR's flagship energy drink before a race. It helps him calm down and focus in. His sponsors love it, for obvious reasons.

Any time he's on camera, he acts calm and cool but internally he's freaking out. If they ask something he doesn't expect, he visibly tenses up and flounders for a second as he tries to figure out what to say, even if it was a simple question.

Doesn't do fan meets or signings unless he absolutely has to. Even then he tries everything he can to get out of them.

His physical attractiveness makes his already poor attitude even worse. Doesn't know how to talk to people, but gets all the praise and attention he could ever want online.

Yes, he posts photos of himself on various social media. He wasn't sure at first, but Ray convinced him to start shortly after his debut race, hoping that it would help reassure him and give him a bit of a confidence boost. Naturally, it went a little TOO well...

He's a gamer through and through. In any downtime he gets, he's still topping the leaderboards on just about every popular racing game you can play online. He also enjoys the occasional game of CoD and will verbally rip anyone to shreds if they try to come at him.

DUBSTEP. He loves it. If his skull isn't rattling from absolutely filthy, grimy bass, he's not interested.

So, of course, he has to have an incredible sound system that's probably worth more than the average person's car.

He doesn't watch anime. (Stop asking him if he does) Most of his entertainment comes from Twitch streams.

He streams himself playing Super Corsa 4 any chance he gets. Which isn't often with the packed NASCAR schedule, but he tries his best. His user is UrStormChasing

Still doesn't get along with Tim after their rivalry in training and isn't very good at pretending he does either. Their crew chiefs have to make deliberate efforts to stop them from running into each other before they get into their cars.

Cruz Ramirez:

5'5 with an athletic build. She is a Latina woman with visible abs and she deserves them gdi.

Side-parted brown hair a little shorter than jaw length, perpetually kinda wild looking.

Chaotic lesbian hours!

ADHD

Literally cannot sleep at night without a big, milky mug of coffee.

It's not normal to wake up and go for a run before even having breakfast?

She's teaching Lightning to use social media more regularly (for better or for worse). His homework is to send her a funny meme or video that he found that week.

The result of this can sometimes be catastrophic. She'll never be able to unhear him uncertainly attempting to use outdated slang.

Almost every race, there's someone complaining about how she doesn't weigh enough and it's unfair to the rest of them. So she forces them to watch as race officials put extra weights in her car.

Has cussed Danny out in Spanish across Pit Road and will do it again if he carries on-

Is probably the only person on Team Dinoco that is actually nice to Cal and doesn't try to tease him. They get along well.

Tim Treadless:

6'0 with a broad frame and light muscle tone.

Tanned skin and tousled brown hair.

Straight ally.

Just call him Mr. Charismatic, everyone loves him.

Everyone except Jackson, that is. Jackson is the only person who brings out his anger to the point of wanting to throw hands.

Has a wife and a baby, bc of course he does.

One of those guys some people hate for being irritatingly perfect. Usually people that don't actually know him.

Has type 1 diabetes and a bad nut allergy.

Was pulled out of a race at the last minute when he went into anaphylactic shock - the entire race was almost stopped when people started to whisper that it was foul play. The race went on, but the only reason for Treadless' absence was that he had to be pulled for "unforseen medical issues".

Some of the other racers still blame Jackson, who actually had nothing to do with it.

Danny Swervez:

5'10 and fairly slender. Not a lot of bulk to him.

Tanned skin (he's Latino) and short black hair.

Cishet male.

This man is FULL of himself. What an attitude.

Genuinely a good racer, but not many people like him.

He's not a good guy. He's given Cruz some trouble for being a woman, though after she embarrassed him by publicly cussing him out in Spanish, he's learned to keep his unpopular opinions on her to himself.

Isn't exactly what we would call "faithful".

But hey, at least he doesn't cheat on the track (smh)

Has just as little respect for the older racers as Jackson, but is less vocal about it.

Is very bitter about Jackson and Tim being more popular than him, yet still does nothing to change himself for the better.

Has at least attempted to physically fight with other drivers that messed with him on the track several times.

Chase Racelott:

5'9 with a build somewhere between Danny and Tim.

Pale skin and dirty-blonde hair.

Straight ally.

Generally a pretty likeable guy. Not as well-loved as Tim, but he has a good amount of pretty dedicated fans.

Makes jokes about being single/available.

Has pretty average performance on the track, not great, but not poor.

Fairly high energy, he gets along well with Cruz.

Probably one of the best with kids. Has a lot of younger fans because of how he interacts with them during meets and signings.

One of the few who will try not to leave until he's spoken to every fan who wanted to meet him, no matter how long it takes.

Often seen hanging around with Ryan - the two of them cause some pretty good natured trouble together, often involving pranks on the other racers.

Ryan "Inside" Laney:

5'11 with a broad build similar to Tim.

Mixed race (¾ Caucasian, ¼ African American), with short black hair.

Closeted bisexual.

Friendly, but not really a standout character as far as the fans are concerned.

Kind of cocky, but in a cool way.

Has a girlfriend who travels with him.

Agent of chaos when he spends too much time with Chase. Don't turn your back on him.

Bubba Wheelhouse

Absolutely massive 6'2 gentle giant

Another gorgeous black man (fight me), his skin tone isn't quite as dark as Jackson's

Closeted homosexual

Has a fake relationship with a lesbian woman who's actually just his best friend (the racing world is scary and the US South probably wouldn't love an openly gay driver)

Kids ADORE him. Him and Chase are the drivers with the most kid fans.

Throws a football around with fans over the catch fence during rain delays (this one is based on the real Bubba Wallace bc its wholesome af)

Gets asked all the weird gay questions by everyone in the friend group. (Ex. "Is it gay if...?" "What is X actually like?")

Legit just trying to mind his own business, he doesn't want any part of drama or rivalries.

Occasionally finds himself roped into girl talk if the guys have their S/Os around. They're very excited to include him. He's too polite to decline.

#i totally didnt forget i had this sitting in my drafts for EVER #im so sorry it took so long to post #i just needed to post this after so long ong i can only apologise #cars headcanons #pixar cars headcanons #jackson storm #cruz ramirez #tim treadless #danny swervez #chase racelott #ryan inside laney #bubba wheelhouse #pixar cars #cars fandom #cars pixar #disney cars #cars 3

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fun-k-board · 1 year

Note

Hey are reqeust still opened if not sorry to bother you but if they are

can you do a child rocky x child reader? (The reader has a younger sister in this) fluff to angst to fluff

It's basically how rocky met reader and their sister as kids and then one day reader and their sister have to move (you can decide why if you want) and rocky gets sad by this but they meet again as adults working together at lackadaisy

(Hope this isn't too much)

Pronouns used : None

Note(s) :

Of course! I'm not too sure what you wanted the sister to do when they're older, or just narrative wise? I didn't have any ideas, my bad.

Rocky was never a calm person, mind and body always running faster than anybody could keep up with, especially in his youth. While his aunt was a ferice and true Christian woman, someone who practically haunted his dreams, at least she didn't have a gun. It was times like this, where he, his cousin and miss pepper where behind a van being shot at, he missed the older times. Even if they were boring and filled with church.

Although, that wasn't because he missed her per say, it was more for two young siblings he met when he was younger himself. They were his best friends and most trusted companions, besides Freckle of course, and had met in his opinion, the best of circumstances.

Not at church, not doing something nice for either of them, instead, Rocky had shoved pancakes on either of his arms, creating sleeves of some kind. Syrup covered him and he was a complete mess. He was running away from a shouting auntie and managed to get lost, at a house away from his own in a forest. It wasn't well kept at all.

There he found two kids the same age as him, they didn't look like locals, strange clothes for this weather and they didn't seem to be playing, just standing out their house. When they both noticed him, the younger of the two quietly laughed and pointed not so discreetly at the pancakes lining his arms.

"He looks silly!" She whispered, staring at him like he was some strange creature and pulling on the older ones clothes.

"Hello! It's nice to meet you!" The eldest, you, outstretched a hand, he noted both of your ways of saying words was weird, but also not. Like you two were pretending to have an accent. Rocky grinned. It was clear you're all going to best friends from that moment, because he thought so. He thrust his hand forward and shook your own aggressively.

"Name's Rocky! Your name my-" He paused, then cartoonishly put his hands on his hips "-dearest neighbour?"

"My name is (F/N), This is-" You, jumping in shock as your younger sister yanked on your fur to push herself in front of you.

"(S/N)!" She happily grinned, giggling and absent minded. Tail swishing happily as she looked up at the older boy, he could swear she reminded him of himself in some way.

Every few days you'd all meet up, he even brought Freckle on some days, but as the days passed, and even months flew by, he began to notice how different you both seemed from the first meeting. (S/N) seemed more quiet as they met more, unable to run and laugh as she once could, and you were more protective, less adventurous and too busy helping your sister walk to speak to Rocky.

Until one day you both stopped coming all together.

He waited an hour each day for a month just to see you two again, Freckle stayed even after that, but even then you still wouldn't come back. They both banged on the door, yelling for you, yet the inside was always still, even less taken care of than before. You had both left. And he denied it for so long, but he realised as he grew why. Rocky at first believed you to have left because you both hated him, you both lost interest in your friendship and simply didn't want to be around him anymore.

But he noticed the signs, he knew the truth, (S/N) was sick, deathly so, she couldn't breathe and instead sat down on most days, even you seemed more sickly. Yet both of you were determined to at least see him and his cousin.

He tried to convince himself you just left for a doctor, but no doctor takes that long, he knew you both most likely died from some illness you weren't used to. With how you both spoke, you weren't from here, and you couldn't resist disease here. It weighed on him, how he didn't confront you about it, to at least confirm his suspicions.

And now, in gunfire and feeling his consciousness drain, it all felt fuzzy, familiar, warm. He wanted to go back and see you both again, one of the highlights of his youth, but also one of the most horrifying parts.

Rocky's eyes snapped open, he was shoved onto a couch like a sack of dirt, the force knocking some air from him and causing spurts of coughs and croaky mumbles of confusion. His vision was blurred and he felt like he drank an entire bottle of alcohol, but he could make a shape from all the chaos. It was speaking, and sounded angry, he noticed what he assumed to be Viktor leaving and slamming the door behind him, that's when the shape drew closer.

It held his hand, it was fuzzy... He noticed the accent, it was familiar. Then came the hug, you're warm. He wanted to reach out and hug you back, but not only did it hurt to breathe, he guessed he understood how you felt back then, but he realised you were wrapping something around him, not hugging him.

Black dots crowded his vision, and the next thing he knew he felt fabric on his chest different from his shirt, itchy and medical. Rocky grimaced and gripped the sofa cushion uncomfortably digging into his side, wanting it all to be over, he loved the job, just not this part. He felt himself fade away once again.

It took so much from you to not force him awake, but you waited, you had waited before for years, what was a few more hours? Your thoughts raced and you felt like sobbing, your sister had begun helping other injured within the Lackadaisy staff before she left for the night, believing he wouldn't wake until morning, yet it still didn't persuade you to leave his side.

Not even after the night ended and you had wasted precious time, you could've helped others with your sister, but all you could think of was him. Was he the same? You didn't know, and a part of you wanted to leave and never see him again, he could hate you for leaving, you never explained why, and he couldn't understand so young. Rocky was your friend, and you hope he still is.

The light began pouring into the room, your tired and aching eyes didn't notice the twitching, your sleepy head not processing the pained grunts from your patient, until he whispered your name.

Your ears perked up, suddenly more alert than they'd ever been in your life, your eyes widened and pulse quickened. He shifted from his position on the couch, before his back was laid flat, now he was turned slightly to look at you, luckily off his injured side.

"Rocky?..." You questioned quietly, smiling brightly and gently moving a hand forward to his coat, peeking underneath to see the blood seeping through had dried, you whispered for him to sit up slowly if he could. Coughing, he did so, wincing in pain and scratching a cushion that rubbed against the injury.

You began wrapping the new bandages around his side, leaning in close to do so, he took the opportunity and hugged you tightly, you almost thought he was planning to remove your spine with the force he pressed against you.

"I missed you too! Please let go-"

#rocky rickaby x reader #lackadaisy rocky #Lackadaisy #Lackadaisy x reader #Lackadaisy Rocky x reader #Rocky x reader #Lackadaisy gn reader #Lackadaisy gender neutral reader #Lackadaisy x gn reader #Lackadaisy x gender neutral reader #rocky x gn reader #rocky rickaby x gn reader #rocky rickaby #lackadaisy rocky rickaby

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ranchthoughts · 1 year

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Moments of ephemerality/permanence/YOLO/photography/voyeurism/control/hypocrisy/accountability etc. in Only Friends ep. 9

last week in meta

Permanence vs ephemerality

As usual, a quick little recap on moments that to me spoke of the ephemeral and the permanent:

Nick says "Why can't I forget about Boston despite the fact that he did lots of shit to me?" -> Nick wishes Boston, his love for Boston, and his memories of Boston are more ephemeral than they are

Nick calls Ray Sand's "haunting spirit," Sand says Ray won't find where he is and join them because Sand isn't that important to him (not worth the time and effort to drive 2 hours into the mountains) -> Sand thinks his relationship with Ray is ephemeral, that what they have (and the interest Ray has for him) is not lasting or permanent

Sand had imaginary (spectral) friends as a kid because he had no real friends as a child

Sand and Nick try hooking up but it doesn't do anything for them -> friendship is the lasting relationship between them, anything romantic/sexual is just a passing fancy, the awkwardness of the moment is also fleeting and they quickly go back to normal

Ray's shirt says "YOLO" while he and Sand sit in the water and talk

Ray again tells Sand "Don't think too hard about it," like he did in his car that one time -> live in the moment, go with the flow, YOLO

All the talk about death at the camper van between Ray and Sand (Ray talking about his life flashing before his eyes, Ray asking if people would cry if he died, Ray requesting a funeral song from Sand, while Sand says "I have dreams. I don't want to die just yet.", Ray asks if he can follow Sand and Sand's dream around "now that I live") -> life is fleeting

Ray and Mew break off their relationship -> this arrangement, pretending to be romantically involved, was fleeting; their platonic friendship is more lasting (like Mew said a few episodes ago about being friends forever)

Cheum says she thought of Mew's changes as him being possessed by an evil spirit (ephemeral, something outside of Mew's control) but Mew says he was just lost and trying to become stronger by becoming someone else for a bit

Despite breaking things off with Ray and understanding that his party-going behaviour was a way of coping with everything that went on, Mew is still dressing like Ray at the end of the episode (are these changes in behaviour, or at least in dress, more permanent than they may have initially seemed?)

Atom wanted a more lasting relationship with Boston, despite the pretense for them hooking up was as one-time experiment to see if Atom was in fact interested in men; once again Boston is saddled with a man who wants something more lasting and committed than he was prepared to give (or was agreed on)

Recording and digital media

Of course, a core example of permanence in this show has been recordings, either in audio or visual form. We saw more of that this episode.

Top records Ray and Sand making out in the music room, though he doesn't show the footage to Mew (...reminiscent of Mew obtaining the footage of Boston and Gap but not showing it to his dad/posting it online... though making Boston very aware of what he *could* have done and what a good person he is for *not* doing that)

Atom says he wants a photo to keep (the idea of photos being a permanent keepsake), Boston took photos of Atom after their hookup

There's something here as well about consensually being recorded vs. not... Atom asking to be photographed by Boston vs Top recording Ray and Sand, like how Boston recorded Ray and Mew or Gap recorded Boston and others (which itself can be contrasted by Mew expressing interest and excitement at being recorded by Gap when he was on his reconnaissance mission).

I was playing around with the idea of surveillance the other week, with Gap running a channel full of sex tapes (that may or may not have been recorded with consent) and Boston using Instagram to find his friends. This week:

Ray figures out where Sand and Nick are based on Nick's Instagram story -> just like how Boston figured out his friends were at the hostel based on Cheum's Instagram story. Again, the characters don't think about what their social media presence is revealing to others

Mew's moms saying they recognize Top from Mew's Instagram

Social media, especially Instagram, has had a recurring role in this series. It makes sense, given the age of the characters, but it also brings up ideas of the appearances we put up/narratives we tell ourselves and others, surveillance, permanent records of things vs. the ephemerality of digital content, etc...

And of course, we these tie into the theme of voyeurism too: Top records Sand and Ray making out in the music room, Nick listening to Boston and his hookup kiss in the bathroom stall for a moment (before interrupting to give a heartfelt apology and goodbye).

Control and Boundaries

Last week I thought some thoughts about control and boundaries, and especially cases where characters said "it's none of your business what I do". We had lots more examples of this this week too:

Sand asks Ray to get out of his way multiple times in the music room and Ray doesn't

Ray tells Sand "Now that I have you in my life I won't let you walk away"

Top steps in to say Mew has a boyfriend when Mew is chatting to the random bar stranger, then grabs Mew by the arm and trying to pull him

Mew tells Top to stay out of his life

Ray demands sex from Mew and Mew shuts him down, Ray asks why Mew slept with Top but not him, Ray giving reasons why he is "owed" sex ("I've been nothing but good to you for the last four years")

Ray phones Sand many times and when Sand picks up, Ray gets mad it took him so long to answer

Sand tells Ray not to come to him, Ray finds out where Sand is and goes to him anyways

Sand tells Ray "I'm not just stuff you have in your possession. I have feelings."

Atom shows up at Boston's house to ask why Boston isn't answering his messages

Boston and Atom have a one night stand so Atom can experiment and figure himself out but Atom is mad it was only one night

Top invites himself along on Mew's shopping trip with his moms even though Mew repeatedly tries to get him to leave

Sand says whether or not he and Nick are hooking up is none of Ray's business

Sand says that if Ray doesn't sort himself out and someone without conditions comes by he will not wait for Ray, though he says he doesn't want this to be pressure on Ray

Mew talks about Sand to Ray in the context of ownership ("If he loves you too, do your best to keep him")

Again we see the idea of ownership - who gets to dictate or have opinions on your life - and boundary crossing, especially as it pertains to leaving people alone (I've lost count in this series so far, but there's been so many cases of people saying "don't find me" or not answering texts but being tracked down regardless).

I would also like to point out how interesting it is to have Nick promise not to see Boston any more in a show where everyone has been categorically incapable of leaving people alone/tracking them down.

Friendship

We had more this episode on friendship, and what friendship entails (I was batting this idea around the other week as well).

Sand and Nick kiss then admit it did nothing for them and agree they are better off as platonic friends (though platonic friends can cuddle). Mew says it is lucky he and Ray didn't hook up because otherwise they wouldn't be able to look at each other in the eye. Again, we see friendship as something defined by the lack of sex, that sex changes a relationship (and that sex is generally something not possible/desirable in a platonic relationship).

Previously, Mew has told us friends are not people you fuck in a car, and Sand has said friends don't struggle to stop kissing one another. Only Ray has provided an alternate definition, that friendships can start from sex, though the audience may debate whether he has been successful in creating friendships or rather other types of relationships.

Change

A couple of weeks ago, and the week before that, I was tracking what characters had to say about change (did they think it was possible? under what conditions? etc.):

Nick in the past has tried to change himself (go to the gym, dress differently, etc.) to appeal to Boston. This week, Nick tells Boston he doesn't have to change, that his friends like him for who is, that people (including Nick) will love Boston for who he is.

Mew in the past has said people can change though it will take time, and he was skeptical of Top being able to change and repent. This week, Mew says he wants to give Top a second chance because he can see Top's efforts (Top is capable of change, it just takes time and effort), and Mew talks about how he himself changed (in behaviour, dress, interests, etc.) as a way to recover from his experiences and find strength ("I want you to understand that what happened to me affected my self-confidence so much. I just thought if I became someone else, I would be stronger"). Mew also tells Ray "Reduce your ego. Not everyone can put up with everything you do" (implying that Ray should change himself so Sand will stick around).

Ray in the past has hinted that change is possible, as he made comments about getting over Mew. This episode we had more of the same, with Ray saying he is working on getting over Mew though it is hard, and also showing a change in the way he interacts with Mew (more self-aware, less idealizing or all encompassing in his feelings for Mew).

Cheum in the past did not think Mew's change (in behaviour, wardrobe, interests, etc.) was good or healthy. This episode she said Mew changing is like he was possessed by an evil spirit, and she says she will come back and work on the hostel project if they all promise to stop with the mess (if they change their behaviour).

We've also been talking about how often characters in Only Friends have had a vested interest in preventing others from changing, like Cheum and Top teaming up last episode over "concern" for Mew (1, 2), and how that relates to themes of control, hypocrisy, and the permanency of labels.

Honesty (and accountability)

There was QUITE a lot of honesty this episode:

Sand and Nick trying to hookup but then admitting it isn't doing anything for them and they are better off as friends

Sand pointing out the parallels between him and Ray hooking up while Ray is seeing Mew, and Top and Boston hooking up (which Mew points out later in the episode as well)

Sand saying he likes Ray a lot and he is jealous of Ray and Mew, but he knows that isn't his place to be upset about; Ray admitting he likes Sand too but Mew is special to him and it is not easy for him to get over Mew (implying that the end goal is to get over Mew)

Ray and Sand talking about Ray's crash and how that made them feel (Ray talks about flashing back through his life when he crashed, Sand says he would have never forgiven himself, etc.), Ray asking if anyone would cry if he died

Mew and Ray's conversation on the bench where Mew says he knows Ray went to see Sand and Ray doesn't deny it, Mew says he is glad Ray picked Sand and admits "You can clearly see I dated you just to hurt Top," Ray admits that he knew that ("I kind of got the hint. But I was trying to fool myself") and says it is nice Mew loves Top; they then share the most honest and sincere "I love yous" with each other this series

Nick giving a heartfelt speech to Boston about his feelings for him, apologizing for what happened, and promising not to see him anymore

Mew admitting to Cheum he is still in love with Top and explaining the reasons why he changed as he did (he felt vulnerable and insecure)

I'd like to point out that not only are the characters being honest with each other to an extent we have not seen before, but they are also being honest with themselves. Sand admits he really likes Ray, Ray admits that he was trying to convince himself Mew actually loved him romantically, Mew admits that he changed because he was insecure and wanted to be strong and that he was just dating Ray to make Top jealous... and so on.

There's been some talk about how maturely Ray and Mew, for example, handled their break-up, and the amount of honesty in that conversation played a big role in that maturity. If the characters do not own up with themselves (and others, of course) about their behaviour, their motivations, and their impacts, how can they show true accountability and learn and grow from their actions and choices?

Hypocrisy and moral superiority

After episode 6 I threw around some ideas about Top and Mew and their dynamic. Top has a habit of casually trying to sway Mew's opinions, especially against Ray (insinuating that Ray doesn't work hard on the hostel project, insinuating that Ray will never stop having feelings for Mew, etc.). I noticed a few things this episode that reminded me of this:

Mew tells Top to stay out of his life, that his choices are none of Top's business, and Top says he knows that he has no right to make comments about Mew's life and choices (after coming in and making comments about Mew's life and choices...) and then says "I bet you know what you are doing" (trying to smooth it over and convey absolute belief in Mew)

Top doesn't show Mew the video of Ray and Sand ("I don't want to play another dirty trick to get you back") but does make it pretty clear that Ray is doing something -> he's a "good guy" because he didn't share anything that isn't his business, but he hinted at it enough he may as well have shared it. He gets to keep his veneer of "good guy" while also getting his desired outcome (getting Mew's wheels turning re: Ray) - see @thatgirl4815's post here. This is also very similar to what Mew does with Boston and the sex tape: holding all the cards, threatening with them, but not actually deploying them, which allows them to claim moral superiority (and, in Top's case, claim that he is leaving Mew alone to make his own decisions).

Top says if this "Mew the party-goer" is who he wants to be, he will support him, BUT he also says he would love to have the old Mew back -> again, Top gives himself a veneer of "good guy" (he will be there to support Mew whatever his choices are! He respects Mew's autonomy!) BUT while doing so he manages to convey his preference (Mew to return to "normal") and still give an opinion on what Mew should do. It reminds me of what Top said about Lasik - laying it out as an option and suggesting it casually, before belatedly tacking on a comment about how he like Mew in glasses. Top made his preference clear then backtracked, claiming to respect whatever Mew chooses, much in the way he frames his comments about Ray (just simple, casual observations).

This dynamic is really interesting to me given all the talks about control and hypocrisy we've been having over the course of the series, and Mew's much explored superiority complex (especially with regards to morality and sex). Top demonstrates a similar superiority complex, and given he's trying to win Mew back, it's interesting to wonder how many of these affectations have been adopted to appeal to Mew's love of the moral high ground and appease Mew's repeated protestations that his decisions are none of Top's business.

@waitmyturtles and @twig-tea were also talking last week about how this moral superiority works hand in hand with ignoring other peoples' agency and a lack of reflection on how one's actions impact others. Accountability - these young people coming to terms with how their decisions have consequences and setting aside their YOLO ways a bit to think of others - is not possible without (self-)honesty, without giving up control, without taking a step off the high horse of moral superiority and comparison.

Random thoughts

Ray and Mew talk about a sleepover they had (with at least Cheum as well) in second year and talk about being in each other's lives for 4 years... we are getting a slightly better understanding of when this group came together.

On assumptions, which I was thinking about a couple of weeks ago: this episode Ray sees Nick and Sand in bed together and assumes they were hooking up. Once again, we have a character interpreting things through their own lens and one that perhaps reveals more about that character than about what is going on.

On "should have" and the narratives we tell ourselves: once again we had Mew (and Ray) talking about their relationship in terms of what "should" be, for example Mew telling Yo he should be in love with Ray because Ray has been by his side forever.

On comparisons, since this friend squad is constantly comparing themselves to one another: Sand and Mew compare what Sand and Ray have been doing to what Top and Boston did, Ray compares his physical relationship with Mew to Top's (and isn't pleased), Sand says that compared to Boston Ray is a saint (see @lurkingshan's post on that here).

On addiction, which we've seen a lot of talk on/mention of in the show so far (but I haven't been collecting mentions of, regrettably): Mew tells his moms he is not addicted to cigarettes, Mew tells Ray to consult with a therapist about quitting drinking.

hello ephemerality squad: @chickenstrangers, @clara-maybe-ontheroad, @colourme-feral, @distant-screaming, @lurkingshan, @neuroticbookworm, @rocketturtle4, @slayerkitty, @thatgirl4815, @twig-tea, @waitmyturtles, @wen-kexing-apologist

#only friends the series #ofts #ofts meta #ephemerality squad

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warmhealerr · 3 months

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Random OC ask, summer game! ⛱️☀️🌊.

What your OCs or favorite characters would be doing on a beach? In case they absolutely can't go on a beach, what other summer activity do they enjoy?

Bonus level - once answered, pass this ask to 3 other people's inboxes!

Also got tagged by @ardentkurashk (thank you both).

See, I am used to (and prefer) beaches that have more stone than sand, so this answer is gonna be shaped by that.

Focusing on DND chars.

During the day, Ta'rath would sit half immersed where the foam collects in between harsh swimming sessions from one end of the beach to the other. They're definitely doing this naked and people can cry about it. They would hate the drying sand on their skin though, especially as it gets stuck in the creases of their spots and under their feet alongside the cuts they'd earn in the process. They'd most likely wash themself at least thrice after when they get back home, and would still find ways to complain about the particles left.

At night, I can imagine them going back to the beach for some nice peace and quiet. They would sit in the dark, listening to the sea and perhaps few boats creaking, gaze half perceiving the horizon and its subtle orange tint.

(Note : quicksand risks and tide aside, I recommend going to the beach around mightnight-3am once in a lifetime).

Assuming the deep gnomes wouldn't fry under the sun :

Joufos, when he isn't floating on his back, would be sticking to the shore hunting for shrimps, crabs and other edible friends he can reach by hand. Wouldn't catch everything even if he could just because he likes watching and touching the creatures more than throwing them in a bucket to eat later (cat behavior). In a more modern setting he'd be especially into trying to identify every species he can lay eyes on with his phone. Would probably find himself stupid sick or worse because he decided to touch or eat a venomous/poisonous animal, completely ignoring its bright colors.

Oulmat is on her third cocktail and has a big, bright dumb smile on her flushed face. Wouldn't indulge in actual beach activities, she's just here to drink out of the sun's reach and watch people get in trouble.

If Baltumal showed up with her he'd be attempting to sunbathe chilling on a flamingo float, until he eventually drifts off, lost at sea, and rescue teams have to look for him. They've all the time in the world considering he doesn't need to eat nor drink. He'd be back with the most awful sunburned and salt blistered skin you've ever seen but he'd comment he feels no pain and couldn't give less of a shit anyway, he had a good time.

Zilkon shows up with full sports sailing gear, ends up buried in sand and gravel for 5 hours. He has most likely been forgotten by his peers, but as long as he's got sunglasses on he doesn't mind at all. Hopefully people dig him up before the tide gets him.

Mischkit would be annoying everyone at peak hours trying to play frisbee, soccer and volleyball with him in his stupid sexy mankini until eventually enough random strangers agree. He might accidentally destroy a child's sandcastle in the process. He'd be a dick about it and pretend to have no remorse whatsoever but he's gonna have nightmares about it for 3 years.

#bg3 #dnd #Beach episode #Ta'rath tag #Joufos tag #Oulmat tag #Baltumal tag #Mischkit tag #Underdark siblings

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crimeronan · 3 months

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" Today, Eda says, “Luz told me he was made for her.”

“That’s... sweet?” "

holy shittt. fuck. this is how i know you made this fic because i spent the entire time going "you two are the worst possible people to have this conversation". raines entire reaction to that statement. Terrible. Nightmare. Raine You Should be Better Than This. "Ask Darius" raine says, being terrible on purpose.

everything about this was flawless. shout out to eda for going "shes just like you. shes So Much Like You. you mustve raised her" and then adding "and also Entirely Fucking Crazy. Permanently Damaged. just. Broken. a Mess" beautiful. no implications. no ones ever said it better worse.

sick vs. crazy as a dichotomy. crazy as an acknowledgement of what it is, no cover ups, no bullshit, just fucking CRAZY. sick as the reasonable, actual, kind way to see it. sick also making me Viscerally Nauseous compared to Crazy.

"i'd like to know her after shes sick too." wow! most of this fic focuses on eda being terrible, but raine, i think thats The Worst Thing you could've said. thats just. wow. Bad. beautiful. just fucking Terrible. its perfect. like even if eda is outwardly crazy, i was mostly thinking "jesus christ raine"

healing being a demand of the sick from edas pov, and healing being a gift to the sick from raines pov. Nightmare Nightmare Nightmare.

i fucking love this

i love raine So Dearly. and may have character assassinated them a little in this fic, but with love. they're genuinely not malicious, at least (it was CRUCIAL that none of this is ever said anywhere that luz can hear, and that eda went "don't you dare repeat that anywhere near her"). but i wanted to play with the illness versus crazy dichotomy and may have weighted too much of my own fear of therapists into it. LMAO

people are constantly talking about characters who "talk like they're trying to get a good grade in therapy," who are super emotionally self-aware and take other people's feelings into account and use all the right statements when they're speaking. and how irritating it is to encounter this

canon raine is one of the better-emotionally-adjusted characters in toh despite suffering more than jesus and making a lot of godawful decisions. so i wanted the friction between someone who's very self-controlled and has the """right""" outlook on mental health, and someone who Absolutely Does Not. and what a fight about that looks like.

raine is also trying to navigate the concept of mental illness in a world that loosely doesn't really have it -- i think if i drop 'em in a room with camila for a few hours they'll come out of it Much more settled and much less likely to put their foot in their mouth. AND eda's narration about them isn't necessarily reliable. "you just wanted to cure me!!!" eda yells, when what actually happened was more like her shouting "I WILL KILL US BOTH BEFORE I TELL YOU WHY I AM SAD. STOP SMOTHERING MEEEE"

....they're stupid. waow.

the hunter thing might be unforgivable tho SKDLJFLKS. sorry everyone. i was thinking about how much canon time raine spent putting eda through hell while pretending to be brainwashed & was like yeah.... yeah this feels..... about how this particular scenario would go.

#replies #i do subscribe much more to eda's school of thought although my outlook is far less bleak #however i know some people have been Frustrated with how no one except camila is treating luz like she has an actual illness #so. here u go. one more person on Team Illness #toh #princess luz au #princess luz au meta #i guess #raine whispers #eda clawthorne #i love insane old people with problems #thank you for this btw!! somehow i forgot to say. this is lovely. hits on many of the things i was thinking as i wrote it

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duskwoodgirl4life · 10 months

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A/N here is my Christmas oneshot I've been learning to take my time when it comes to writing. Hope you all enjoy reading this as much as I have loved writing it.

I wasn't going to put up decorations this year but Jessy and Lilly convinced me to put them up. They came round to help me get everything looking christmasy but it's not a happy Christmas not for me it isn't. Things just aren't the same without Jake; he's been gone now for almost 4 months. In that time he's contacted me maybe 10 times and that's when he's been able to. I miss him so much his stupid job took him away from me. Why did he have to take up a job with the FBI? Sure it wasn't too bad in the beginning but now that he's been gone this long with barely any contact. My heart feels like it's breaking. I keep thinking he's going to walk through the front door any moment.

Every time my phone rings or a message comes through my heart feels like it's skipping a million beats. I think I have started to get used to the disappointment of it not being Jake. When I spoke to him he kept telling me this is his last job working away and that he will be back in duskwood. Duskwood police offered him a job after he gets back from where he is. He wasn't even allowed to tell me where he was going. I hate the FBI and I hate Jake for leaving me this long.

I don't even want to put up these stupid decorations, I just want to rip them all down and throw them away. Right now I feel so bitter and angry my heart feels like it's broken and can't be put back together. I try my hardest to put on a brave face around the others. I really can't handle Dan telling me he told me so because if I hear him say it I might just punch him. I do my best to snap out of my mood and pretend I am happy as far as the others are concerned nothing is wrong.

I feel like I am full of so much hate after everything that's happened, this was going to be our first Christmas together as a couple he promised he would be here. Instead I have to wake up in an empty bed on Christmas day. He should be there next to me. I'm so lost in my own thoughts I don't see Jessy standing next to me. I feel her hand on my shoulder. I could never hide anything from her. She always knows when something is wrong.

I turn to look at her and I can see that she knows something is wrong, “it’s okay to be angry and upset, I know how much you miss him” Jessy always knows how I'm feeling without having to say it. “This is not how it's supposed to be, he's supposed to be here helping put up decorations and drinking hot chocolate with marshmallows” Jessy smiles warmly at me and pulls me in for a tight hug. “I know one thing this Christmas you are not going to be alone, you have me and the others. We will make it as special as possible”

Jessy is starting to make me feel a little better and I want to be able to at least have a good Christmas this year. “You know what your right Jessy, I want to be able to have a good Christmas. Why don't we play doodle friends? but this time we draw on the white board from Jake's office” Jessy smiles and runs off into Jake's office to get his white board. I pour myself a glass of wine and wait for Jessy to get back. Everyone gathered around Dan insisted on going first; he likes to think he's some sort of picasso.

“Right silence genius at work” I couldn't help but laugh at Dan's comment he starts to draw hoping that it's going to be better than the cigar/skull he drew last time. He starts drawing a face, adding way too much detail, finally he adds a pair of earrings. Everyone is shouting out guesses and getting it all wrong. I suddenly realized what it is that Dan's going on about. “I've got it, it's earrings” everyone is shouting at Dan for his stupid drawing of course he's arguing back.

We carry on playing for a few more hours then everyone leaves “are you sure you don't want me to stay over MC?” I smile and hug Jessy. Her heart is in the right place. “It's okay Jessy I'll be fine, I will be seeing you all tomorrow anyway at Cleos” right now I just want to have time for myself and Jessy understands that. “Okay MC if you change your mind just text me and I'll be right over” I hug Jessy once more before saying goodbye. “I will Jessy, see you all tomorrow morning”

Everyone has left. It's so quiet without them all here. The silence just fills the room, I keep myself busy and tidy up and put all the rubbish in the bin. Once I've finished I sit down on the sofa with a glass of whisky and I put the TV on for some background noise.

The next morning I wake up another day alone without Jake, I drag myself out of bed and go shower. A big part of me wants to go back to bed and not leave the house but I'm not going to do that. After showering and getting myself into something that isn't an oversized hoodie and sweats I put on a new dress I bought for Christmas. This was the dress I was going to surprise Jake with but that is going to have to wait.

Once I've got ready I grab my jacket and keys and head out to Cleos, she's been working so hard on this Christmas dinner. After parking up outside Cleo's I knock on the door and get greeted by a very happy Cleo. “MC!! It's so good to see you, you look amazing in that dress come in” I walk into Cleo's apartment and everything looks amazing. Everyone is already here Dan and Thomas are arguing over what Christmas music to put on. Richy is helping Jessy set the table and Lilly and Jessy are in the kitchen helping Cleo cook dinner.

After dinner we sit around the fire and play games. Everyone is having such an amazing time. For the first in what feels like a lifetime ago I am laughing. It's like I've just put all my problems and worries to one side. “Does anyone want another drink?” Everyone puts their hand up. “I'll give you a hand MC” Jessy and I are in the kitchen making the drinks. I look up out of the window and it's started to snow. It's coming down thick and fast covering the grown in a white blanket of snow.

I sit back down with the others and there is a knock at the door, “I'll get it in already up” Jessy gots to open the door she seemed way too eager to go out a shack the thought away. I hear Jessy open the door but I can't make out who she's talking to.

“Hi, she's in the living room with the others. She's gonna be so happy to see you” I hear someone call out my name and I just freeze. I feel like my heart has stopped beating. I turn around and my eyes go wide and my mouth drops open. “Merry Christmas MC I've missed you so much” at this point tears start to fall from my eyes I pull myself up and run into Jake's arms. “Omg Jake!! I've missed you so much, I can't believe you are really here. How did you know where I was?” Jake's ocean blue eyes are looking back at me and I see that beautiful smile spread across his face. “Jessy told me, I text her yesterday and ask where you would be I wanted to surprise you”

More tears just fall from my eyes. I am so lost for words I just put my arms around Jake and hold onto him. He pulls me away slightly and smiles. He lifts my chin up with his fingers and kisses me softly on the lips. I feel myself just melt into his body as he kisses me. It feels like our first kiss all over again. Everything I have ever wanted is right here in front of me kissing me on the lips. I feel like all my sadness and worries have just been washed away; it's like they don't even exist anymore. The love I have for Jake is so strong I feel like my heart is complete.

“MC I want you to know that I am never being away from you again, my work with the FBI has now come to an end.” Just when I thought the smile on my face couldn't get any bigger I'm smiling so much that my face is starting to ache but I don't care I'm so happy. “Just hearing you say that Jake makes me so happy” everything that has felt like it has been missing in my life is now complete. I am the happiest I have ever been. “There is one more thing MC, it's something I've been waiting to ask you” my mind starts to run away with itself trying to figure out what Jake is on about. “MC, will you marry me?” I watch as Jake gets down on one knee, holding a small ring box in his hand. “Yes Jake, yes I will marry you” Jake slides the ring onto my finger and we both share a kiss.

What started out as what was going to be an awful Christmas has now turned out to be the best day of my life. I am with the man of my dreams and I have my closest friends right by my side.

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