#because fuck they took forever (i may be editing it and sending it into a competition)

[fandom-blackhole]

I havent posted any of my RA bulletin boards or door decs this semester yet, so if you're curious here they all are :)

Crafting Your RA (our building in minecraft themed, im the meadow biome)

Homesickness (Gravity Falls was at its height hyperfixation level and this one took FOREVER)

Endure & Survive Midterms (i needed a lil tlou to keep me going at this point, also my most low effort board)

Handling the Pressure (this board is so fucking hypocritical considering how bad mentally and physically ive been doing, but its very close for stealing favorite board of the semester. If you zoom in you can read the words!)

[starlightval]

Hi! I wasn't sure if you took requests or prompt ideas or anything so please ignore this if you dont, but i absolutely freaking love your writing and was wondering if maybe you could so something on what loving Rooster is like or something soft like it?? can be as short or long as you like, i just need some more rooster fluff from the obvious queen of writing it 🥺💕

you. are. so. sweet 🥺 queen of writing fluff?? what an honor, i hope i can do this title justice <3 i haven't offically posted that i take requests or prompts but absolutely send them in because writers block can be such a pain! its super short more of a blurb than anything since im currently at work and wanted to get this out asap but i hope you love it angel

pairing: bradley 'rooster' bradshaw x reader

synopsis: loving rooster is so easy

warnings: n/a, just something super short and sweet

not edited!

masterlist

Loving Rooster was easy.

So, so unbelievably easy.

They said no one was perfect but if anyone were to come close it would be him. 

He was your safe place, your break from all of the worries in the world. Your best friend in every way of the word.

Everything you gave, he gave right back ten fold and he certainly wasn’t shy about loving you. Every chance he had, he openly expressed how much he loved you and appreciated you or showed you through little touches and actions. 

He didn’t care who was around to witness nor did he give a damn about what anyone thought. Not even when Hangman ultimately gave him shit about being whipped or acting like a girl in love, he simply brushed it off with a wave and said that Hangman was just jealous that nobody would put up with his ass. 

Sometimes you’d ask yourself if it was all good too good to be true. Burned too many times by guys of the past who played with your emotions making you feel stupid for wanting to cuddle up on them or even something simple like hold their hand in public.

But Rooster lived for things like that. He lived for your habit of kissing him every time you two parted even if it was just to go up the bar to grab another beer or how you always leaned into his side when you stood next to each other which prompted him to wrap his arm around your shoulder and the thousand watt smile you give him everytime you catch his eye? To. Fucking. Die. For.

Don’t even get him started on dancing with you, if he could do it forever he would. Everything from slow dancing and it feeling like you’re the only two people in the world to flailing around like idiots together nearly doubling over with laughter at the ridiculousness of the others move is his favorite.

And your affectionate nature works out well for him because this man can’t go two seconds without having his hands on you honestly and needs at the minimum three kisses a day from you to be able to function properly but thats a whole other thing. 

If you’re walking together your fingers are interlaced, never just holding because that’s not intimate enough 'I’m your boyfriend not your friend honey' or his hand is at the small of your back leading you through whatever crowd you may be in.

If you’re sitting next to one another and he can’t wrap his arm around your shoulders then you bet your ass his hand is at least on your thigh and he’s pulling your chair as close as he can to his. 

If he’s seated across from you? You guessed it, he’s going to try and play footsie under the table with you or at the very least have one of your legs pressed up against his.

And good god do not even think about leaving him when he’s sleeping. Man turns into a grumpy child and will one hundred percent drag himself out of bed to come find you, that is if you could even manage to break free of his bear grip in the first place. 

Bradley Bradshaw was truly a dream come true and you thanked whatever higher power had sent him into your life for him everyday.

[descendantofthesparrow]

Huma x reader (mainly showing Harry x reader) - slowburn oneshot - brand new

wattpad version (smut included)

Ao3 version (smut included)

=

-This is a smut oneshot(edit; turned into a slow burn oneshot that goes into smut cuz I can edit2.0; this tumblr version doesn’t have smut in it, it is hinted at but otherwise its not written but I will link to the AO3 and Wattpad versions that will have the smut posted) because im trying to practice writing it and (y/n) is written with she/her pronouns and has female body parts because, again, im still practicing on smut and want to get used to writing my own…body type before I branch out to attempt to write any other type anyways LETS GET TO IT-

Your leg bounced as you stared at the wooden swing doors of Ursula's chip shop. Harry had left to do some errands two hours ago, and usually he got those particular errands, collecting payment for the protection of shops and territory, done within two hours.

But it had been a whole two hours, you glanced at the clock again, and two minutes. Something burned in your gut, telling you something was wrong. You wouldn’t dare voice your concern in front of the crew and the chip shop customers, you would be cackled at for even entertaining the idea of worrying about someone, even if it was Harry.

You and Harry weren't close, you were just a simple crew member on Uma’s crew, you had joined after their adventure to the isle of the doomed so you didn’t have the bond that the crew had after going through something life-threatening. You were pretty sure Harry didn’t even know your name!

But that never stopped the butterflies in your head and stomach when you heard him laugh, never stopped the heat creeping up your neck when he smirked, never stopped the fuzzy feeling in your head when his ever so bright ocean blue eyes lined with black liner scanned the crew, never once locking onto you but that didn’t stop your heart from beating faster than a hummingbirds wings…whatever hummingbirds were but Gil had rambled about them one day after he found a bird fact book and that particular fact stuck in your head.

Besides, Harry practically had every vk at his feet, hell you were pretty sure Uma liked him too, and he liked her, with how they looked at each other it was a wonder that the entire isle didn’t ‘gossip’ about them.

And you were nothing compared to Uma, who in all honesty, was fucking gorgeous, so you could never blame Harry if he chose her out of all his “suitors” because who were you compared to Uma? You were just the daughter of simple thieves who had unfortunately been sent to the isle.

You looked at the clock again and frowned, it had only been another two minutes but that didn’t stop the pit in your stomach from growing. If Harry wasn’t back by 8:30, which was a bit less than a half-hour from now, then you would go looking for him…well if Uma didn’t send anyone out to look for him first, but she trusted him so she might not send anyone out at all.

But like you, Uma nervously glanced at the doors and clock every few minutes, like you, she also felt something was wrong but had to keep her usual calm demeanor in front of the crew.

You made eye contact with her after looking away from the clock again, Uma raising her brow in curiosity as you felt your ears burn and you looked to the doors quickly.

You counted down the minutes to 8:30, your fingers tapping rapidly against your tray of food and the heel of your boot hitting the leg of your stool in time.

It had been two and a half hours after Harry left for his errands, and you had finally had enough, you made eye contact with Uma as you stood and she nodded, glancing towards the doors then the sword check then back at you.

You somehow understood each other and you nodded back, heading towards the doors quickly as you snatched your cutlass from the sword check and raced out the chip shop in search of Harry.

-

You hopped over a rusted metal fence and landed on your toes; your eyes wide with caution. you were now just along the lines of territory a rival gang that had been attempting to take Uma’s territory for the past couple months. After you had gone to all the areas that Harry was supposed to go for his collecting route, Dizzy, bless her little heart, had nervously told you about Dylan, Clayton’s son, and his gang had ambushed Harry just a bit after he had finished up at Dizzy’s and kidnapped him and stole all the money he had just collected.

So you went to go collect the pirate and the money they had stolen, they were probably going to keep him for ransom against Uma, but what ransom would they have if there was no pirate or money?

You may have been the daughter of two ‘simple’ thieves but….then again, they were simple on the isle, not in Auradon.

Your lip twitched as a bout of cruel laughter echoed out from the building, you sprinted forward silently as you noticed one of the gang members on lookout duty starting to come around the corner to your right. You took a leaping step, catching yourself on an open window ledge and pulling yourself up swiftly, jumping up the three feet gaps between the windows as the guard passed below you not even knowing you had been where he was walking just a moment ago.

You thanked whatever god was out there for your (dad/mom) teaching you how to free run when you were younger. You peeked into one of the dark floors of the building, pursing your lips a bit as you remembered that their gang site was in an abandoned parking lot. Not much room for error, or hiding places.

You hopped through the window and landed silently on your feet, stopping as another bout of laughter echoed below you.

They kept to the lower floors then, which was good to know, it also meant both an easier and harder escape once you had Harry. Easier because less distance between Harry and the exit, harder because less distance between the exit and the gang.

You ran over to the stairwell; glad you had decided to wear your shoes with no heel as it made running quietly much easier. You grinned as you stepped into the stairwell, no door. hopefully, the other floors didn’t have them either, or else if they squeaked both you and Harry would be in for some shit.

You glanced at the faded number on the wall.

The seventh floor, wow you had climbed quite a bit, hadn't you? You shook away the thought, swiftly yet carefully climbing down the stairs, scanning each floor as you arrived to check for the gang.

Finally, you arrived on the third floor, the only floor with any light coming from it. You moved to stand flush against the wall next to the doorway of the floor, peering in as best you could without anyone seeing you, glancing every now and then to the stairway for any other gang members.

You huffed quietly as Dylan pushed at Harry's limp head, cackling and muttering to himself as he circled Harry like a bloodthirsty shark. You grit your teeth as you got a good look at Harry in the dimly lit area he was in. he was tied to both a structural beam and a folding chair, blood dripped from the side of his head down to his jaw and off his chin, he was starting to bruise on his face, neck, and possibly his torso and wrists, but those weren’t visible at the moment so you settled for guessing his injuries.

His right ankle was also at a VERY worrying angle…you might have to take some drastic measures to get Harry out of this parking garage.

Dylan was muttering something about how Uma would bow to him when she found her ‘precious’ first mate all bloody and beaten, and how he would finally have command of the wharfs.

“not on my watch” you muttered, quickly coming up with a plan and digging into your thigh bag, pulling out a handful of mini smoke bombs that your (dad/mom) had made forever ago in case one of the three of you needed them. You took out your lighter and lit the fuses, chucking them into the room and smirking as they landed right beside the gang members, luck seemed to be on your side today.

“what the hell-HOLY-“ Dylan let out a high-pitched screech as smoke burst from the nozzle of the smoke bombs and quickly filled the room, for being the size of ping pong balls they sure packed a wallop of smoke.

Pulling up your bandana to prevent any smoke inhalation you dashed into the room, running towards Harry but was stopped as a foot came arching your way. You held up your arms in front of your face and blocked the kick, stepping back quickly as the gang member started swinging at you, grunting with effort as you dodged and misdirected his punches.

“WHO THE HELL IS THAT?!” Dylan yelled, you smirked under your bandana, you weren’t really a known member of Uma’s crew, liking to keep to the shadows and out of sight.

You took the moment of disorientation from Dylan’s yell that caused the gang member to slip up and ducked under his next swing, one arm grappling around his next ant clasping with your other hand, your right foot going behind his ankle and pulling him forward flipping him over and slamming him into the ground with a loud crack.

He was out for the count, now, you looked up and around you, through the smoke you could see maybe 9 members left, including Dylan. Should be easy enough, you glanced at Harry, frowning slightly as he started to cough, but you would have to work quickly so Harry didn’t get all the smoke in the garage in his lungs.

You threw yourself back as another lackey of Dylan’s threw a punch at you, you decided to make quick work of them and grabbed their wrist, pulling it up and back towards them, smirking at the sickening pop that sounded from their shoulder. They screamed and dropped to the ground in agony, yelping as you leaned back from a sweeping air kick and slammed your hands onto the floor, using the momentum and lifting your legs back with you.

Your foot slammed into the next lackey's chin and he fell back, his skull slamming against the floor with a crack. You rolled back into a summersault and stood on your feet, catching the leg that was aimed at your chest and pulling the lackey towards you, kicking them twice in the stomach then throwing them over your shoulder with a twist of your torso and a spin of your feet.

They crashed to the floor just next to Harry, who was just barely coming to consciousness and jumped at the loud noise. He squinted through the smoke and dimly lit area, eyes widening as he spotted the spray panted symbol of Uma’s crew plain on your jacket sleeve.

Dylan watched in shock as you easily took out his gang members, and when the final one fell, he could feel the smug grin you had when you turned to face him.

Dylan let out an intelligible yell and rushed at you, only for his world to go black as you stepped to the side, grabbed his arm, turned your back to his chest, and swung him over you using his momentum.

Dylan and his gang were out for the count. And with Dylan knocked out the smoke finally cleared and all that was left was the dimly lit floor, the unconscious bodies of the gang, and an injured Harry.

You let out a soft sigh and pushed down your bandana, walking towards Harry and flipping out your pocket knife, kneeling next to Harry and cutting the ropes around his wrists and legs, then the ones around his torso keeping him to the beam. “woah-“ you pressed your hands against Harry's chest gently as he tried to rush out of the chair. “-hold up, you’re really hurt” Harry looked down at you, and you winced as you saw his swelling eye and bleeding nose for the first time, his lip was busted too.

“who-“ Harry slurred, trying to ask for your name or your rank in the crew but was unable to get the words out still being very much out of it from being jumped and beaten.

“im (y/n), im a regular ol’ crew member, and I got worried about you and came looking, come on, there are still some members on guard duty and we need to skedaddle before they come up” Harry gave a slow nod and with your help got to his feet, letting out a yelp as he put too much pressure on his broken ankle.

“um, okay” you quickly thought up a plan and had Harry lean on you almost completely, cursing Dylan for making the main part of his hideout on the third floor, now you had to get Harry down three flights of stairs just to get him to the doors. You and Harry froze at the sound of heavy footsteps running up the stairs, you let go of Harry's hand and lowered him to the ground, quickly jumping into a fighting stance and glaring at the stairwell doorway.

You felt Harry's eyes on you as did so, but you did your best to ignore him and the butterflies that swarmed in your stomach. You slumped as Gil’s concerned face popped above the stairs, his eyes widening as he looked at Harry “holy heck, what happened?” Gil asked, walking over to Harry and checking him over.

“Dylan wanted him for ransom for the captain's territory, I took care of it” Gil gave you a look, you were never one to take initiative in the crew, well he didn’t either but you always stayed in the background, always seeming too scared to do anything about…well anything.

So for you to go out of your way to save Harry made Gil want to scratch his head. It clicked for him a moment later when he remembered how you always stared at Harry, with a look he could never put his finger on. Yes, Harry was the first mate and any of the crew members should put their life on the line to rescue him if needed but you didn’t do this as a crew member, you did this out of your personal feelings.

Gil, for once, didn’t think aloud, just hoisted Harry into his arms, ignoring Harry's protests and light smacks against his shoulder, and walked down the stairwell, you taking a moment to collect Harry hook that had been attached to one of the lackeys and running after them.

-

You stood awkwardly at the door frame of Harry's room as Gil set the injured pirate on his bed, you had never seen his room before, it was…a decent size, but you forced yourself not to memorize it for…reasons.

“I’ll tell Uma” you muttered aloud, walking away from Harry's room as you saw Gil nod, not seeing Harry strain his body in an attempt to keep his eyes on you.

When you arrived back at the chip shop and quietly informed Uma of the situation, she cursed and looked to the clock, she wasn’t off till midnight and it was only 9:15, she had another two hours and forty-five minutes before she was off and then she still had to clean!

“just-have Gil take care of him” she muttered back, pushing you back towards the chip shop doors “there's a medical kit in my quarters, under the board just left to the door, it'll jiggle when you step on it, give that to Gil and he’ll know what to do” you nodded and ran back to the ship, not wanting Harry to suffer for any longer than he was.

You went to Uma’s quarters, whistling a bit at the size of the room, and turned to the left, flipping up the loose board and taking out the large duffle bah with the red plus symbol on the side. “this has to be it” you muttered, standing and walking out of the room, closing the door behind you and making your way to Harry's room. you peeked into the room, frowning at the sight of Harry's very swollen turning very red and dark purple ankle. You knocked on the door frame and stepped into the room, handing the duffle bag to Gil.

The boys seemed to realize exactly where the bag was from and looked at you apprehensively, gosh sometimes you forgot how protective of Uma they were, even if it was a simple item. “she gave me permission to get that, I'll be out of your hair now” you spun on your heel and speed-walked out of the room, ignoring the butterflies in your gut as you felt Harry's eyes on you again.

-

It took Harry almost two months to heal from his injuries, his ankle still had ways to go so he was forced to be on the bench for crew activities and his usual errands until he could walk without his ankle being at a weird angle or him wincing in pain every time he took a step or shifted his ankle.

Gonzo and Bonnie took over his usual errands as Gil took over as temp-first mate until Harry was all healed up.

During those two months, you had noticed something….new.

Harry and Uma had taken to staring at you…a lot…like a lot a lot.

At first, you thought you were imagining things, the feeling of eyes constantly on you, then you thought that maybe some of Dylan's gang members had found out you were the one to sabotage his plan and were spying on you.

Those thoughts went out the window when one day you turned to look over your shoulder and saw Harry and Uma staring directly at you, Uma leaning on the long table on her elbows as Harry covered his mouth and some of his nose with his chin resting in his palm. You snapped your head back around and curled in on yourself, willing the heat growing up your neck to go away.

The next odd thing to happen was Uma beginning to actually…use you for crew things? Usually you just kinda…sat back and watched as everyone else did stuff, not of your own violation or laziness, it's just that Uma and Harry never seemed to…have anything to do for you?

But now it seemed like Uma was actually trying to include you in pirate activities, even once assigning you to her when the ship needed some maintenance on its ropes. She also started to either keep close to you as you trained in combat with the crew or sometimes even training you herself.

Which led to some…situations, you see, while you were pretty much an expert in hand to hand combat you fucking sucked with swords so once in a while you fumbled with your sword and…Uma while not being a PDA person, well unless it was Harry but even then, would walk toward you and correct your grip, stance, your free hand for balance, and even lead you in some sort of weird dance to help you learn your footwork.

It was like she was…sizing you up, if that was the best word, always keeping her eye on you, asking you random questions, making you help out in the chip shop, and just…having you be around her more than you used to.

Then there was Harry, after two months of just staring at you, he started talking to you, first “thanking” you for saving his ass from Dylan, aka he made you a bracelet and tossed it in front of you with a nod and a mutter of  “thanks”. Gil had muttered next to you that Harry liked to make people stuff as a way to thank them, and held up his own bracelet that Harry made for him when they were younger “it's just one of the ways he shows appreciation!”

Then it moved to small conversations about random things, they weren’t long, just…small talk when you ended up in the same place as each other or when you were both on nightshift guard duty. The staring hadn't stopped, but you didn’t mind it as much as you used to, knowing it was Harry and Uma keeping their eyes on you, for whatever reason, but it made you feel….safe? you didn’t know the feeling that came with them watching you but you knew it wasn’t scared or threatened.

One day Harry asked you to practice some knots with him, setting up two crates and making you sit across from him. As you worked on learning how to make a round turn and two half-hitches knot, Harry stared at you, watching you ever so carefully, drifting his gaze from your concentrated face to your swift and calloused fingers as you successfully pulled the knot together, looking up at him with a shy grin, seeking his approval.

He smirked and nodded, patting your knee and beginning to instruct you on how to do other knots, in a softer voice than before. Next, is something that took you a pretty long time to notice but, they started to get physically closer to you when they could. Like when the crew crowded around the table for mealtime at the chip shop. In the beginning, you always sat at the farthest end of the table, always keeping to yourself and trying not to bother anybody.

But as time went on, you were slowly being pushed towards the middle of the table where Uma, Harry, and Gil always sat, or sometimes you would sit in your usual seat and Harry or Uma would be away from their seats and closer to you. You didn’t notice any of this until your shoulder was in line with Harry’s, his jacket brushing against your arms and legs knocking into yours.

They both seemed to also attempt to get you into conversations more, Uma’s hands ending up on your arms or shoulder when she talked to the crew if they weren’t on Harry's shoulder, Harry leaning in close to you when you had your little conversations, Uma staring intently as you trained with the crew.

Most of this you didn’t notice, being the oblivious and overthinker person you were, you brushed off the thought of a possible connection with the two and thought they were just doing what captain and first mate did, have a good relationship with a crew member was essential.

What you didn’t see was the crew smirking as Harry stared at you, snickering when Uma rested her hand on your shoulder, whispering to themselves as their eyes always flashed over to you when you walked through the doors, gossiping when Harry sneaked his own food onto your plate.

Even Gil, who was admittedly a bit airheaded, could see what was going through the minds of his two oldest friends. He just grinned and leaned back, knowing he had started it all when he had told Uma of his “theory” of you possibly having feelings for her first mate/kinda boyfriend.

She at first just wanted to size you up, to see if you were “worthy” of her best friend, she and Harry had an open relationship, if either of the others wanted to get with someone else as long as they talked it through and got consent it wasn’t a problem. Uma just wanted to see if you wouldn’t hurt Harry.

She didn’t expect to catch feelings for you. It was something that boiled beneath the surface of her skin as it developed, she didn’t even notice it happened. The feeling of sparks dancing across her fingertips when her hand touched yours when she fixed your grip on your sword, the burst of warmth beneath her skin when she locked eyes with you, the flutter in her gut when you laughed at one of Gil’s stupid jokes or Harry’s dumb stunts.

It was all the same feelings she got when she was around Harry, but it took only one moment for her to realize she had fallen for you. It was just supposed to be a regular Sunday on the isle, it was her day off so she decided to spend it with you meandering around the marketplace, not particularly looking for anything just browsing.

Their time at the market had been shortened by the arrival of Dylan, taunting Uma and getting in her face. “come on shrimpy!” he snickered, his gang behind him cackling loudly “too scared to go against me-GUk” Uma snapped her head around to look at Dylan as he suddenly gasped for breath and her eyes widened in shock. Dylan was on his back, holding his gut as you stood in front of Uma, tilting your head dangerously as the gang took a step back.

“not a good idea to disrespect the captain, Dylan” you growled, sending a shiver down Uma’s spine, you weren’t much a talker, and when you did it was soft, but now? There was a thick tension to your voice, almost reminiscent of Harry's low growly tone when he got angry.

Dylan slowly sat up and glared at you, eyes widening as he realized who you were “you’re-you’re the bitch that” he paled at the smirk on your face.

“that kicked your asses? All on her own? Yeah, I’m that bitch, now back the fuck up before I snap your teeth with my boot” Uma swallowed around the rising heat in her neck, rolling her shoulders to get rid of the uncomfortable tension that was growing inside her.

Dylan let out a snarl and snapped his fingers, three of his lackeys running towards you, all yelping as you took them down with ease. Uma smirked as the lackeys landed next to Dylan, who then stood quickly and bolted the other way.

Dylan stood and looked behind him, freezing as he noticed almost all his gang had abandoned him, the only one left was his right-hand man, who stared at you with wide fearful eyes. Dylan slowly turned as he heard you crack your knuckles and squeaked as you gave a sharp smirk “this is the part where you run away~” you giggled, holding in a loud laugh as Dylan and his last lackey turned and ran with their tails between their legs.

You rolled your shoulders with a sigh and turned back to Uma, feeling your cheeks burn as she stared at you with wide eyes “uh…captain?” Uma snapped out of her trance and smirked at you.

“and here I thought Harry lied to me about your fighting skills~” her smirk softened as you tugged at your shirt. “come on, let's finish up here”

It was only when you returned to the ship and Uma got a moment to herself, that she realized what those feelings were in the market, they were the same feelings she got when she looks at Harry.

She liked you…a lot. Uma let out a low groan and sunk into her chair in her quarters, now she had to deal with feelings for her chaotic dumbass first mate and the oblivious yet badass crew member.

She went from just checking you out to make sure you were good for Harry to now fucking liking you…what a trope huh?

Harry on the other hand, had realized his feelings from the start, they were very small to start with, he hadn't even known your name before the fateful day when you saved him from Dylan.

It felt like his heart was jumpstarted as he locked eyes with you as you flipped Dylan over your back, sparks running across his skin when you undid the ropes around his wrists.

First, he was impressed, you had gone out of your way to save him and then took down almost an entire gang, some of the members easily overtaking you in size and strength but you took them down as if they were nothing. Then you had been so protective of him as you tried to make your way out of the parking garage with him, even getting ready to fight Gil before you knew it was Gil.

As you walked out of Harry's room after giving Gil the medical pack, he had asked Gil what your position on the crew was. As Gil told him about you, he remembered when you told him your name and he quietly muttered it, smiling slightly as he decided it fit you perfectly

Then he was amused, you were much shyer than he thought you would be, you were always by yourself in a corner, keeping to yourself and never talking to anyone. As he moved closer to you during meal times, he enjoyed the little sarcastic comments you muttered to yourself as you listened to whatever the crew was talking about. He giggled to himself at the look on your face when he dropped the ‘thank you’ bracelet in front of you, mentally dancing in excitement when he saw you wearing it the next day and then never take it off,  he didn’t know why he mentally danced in excitement but he brushed away the implications of it.

Then he and Uma started to attempt to get closer to you, well Uma was doing…her own thing while Harry was trying to get closer. First, he started with having you learn and help him tie the ropes around the ship, watching you as you at first fumbled with any type of rope he attempted teaching you, his heart fluttering when you finally got it and looked up at him for approval, a shy grin on your face.

He watched enraptured as you trained with Uma, chucking as he could imagine the steam coming off your face as Uma placed her hands on your hips and hands and corrected your stance. He cackled when you knocked Gil to the floor on a hand-to-hand combat training day, falling to his side as you leaned over Gil's dizzy self with your hands moving about unsure of what to do.

He watched you interacted during the quiet moments of the night when you would both be on night shift watching the ship, your shy nature seeming to melt away under the cloudy black sky as you rambled about whatever you were thinking about. He never really noticed himself leaning ever so close as you talked, only able to focus on you.

He noticed the crew teasing him and Uma pretty early on, though they were easily silenced when either him or Uma glared at the crew.

One day, he realized he was smitten with you. The crack of your voice when you got nervous, when you fidgeted with your rings, the smirk on your face when you flipped one of the crew members over your back, the laugh that spilled from your lips when you finally got the hang of using your sword, when you rubbed your thumb against your lips as you zoned out, it all made him feel warm inside, the same feelings he got around Uma.

He had to tell Uma about his feelings for you, they were in an open relationship but he wanted to make sure she was alright with you before he pursued anything with you.

One night after Uma finished up at the chip shop, she arrived to her quarters to see Harry sitting on her bed, playing with the curve of his hook as he waited for her. “Harry?” Uma groggily asked, she was exhausted but Harry never seeked her out after midnight, so something was up “what's going on, what do you need?” she closed the door to her room with her foot and slipped off her boots and hat, walking over to harry and flopping down on the bed next to him. “um-“ Harry stuttered, the red in his ears creeping down to his cheeks “yeh know (y/n)?” Uma perked up at that, pushing herself up with her hands and staring hard at Harry.

“yeah?” Uma’s heart sped up at the mention of the girl she had fallen for, god she hoped Harry wasn’t going to say he didn’t like her, and then Uma would feel like shit and she’d never be able to kiss the shit out of you till either of you couldn't see straight. “what about her?”

“I-um…I-…I like ‘er…like I like yeh” Harry’s face was almost crimson now, staring down at his lap as he played with the loose threads on his pants. “and-and I was wonderin’ if I-I could…um, invite ‘er into our relationship?” Harry's voice cracked at the end, oh so nervous and scared for what Uma was going to say.

“thank fuck I thought I was the only one” Harry snapped his head around to look at Uma, his mouth dropping open slightly “god fuck isn’t she so fucking pretty?!”

Harry let out a small sigh of relief and fully turned to look at Uma, sitting up on his knees “YES! Fuck she so pretty I just wanna smoother her in fucking i-gaaah ya know?!” he lifted his hands in front of his face and clenched them in an odd motion of frustration from (y/n)s prettiness. Uma laughed and nodded, grabbing onto Harry's hands and gripping them tightly.

“I do know, and I would be a hundred percent down for inviting her into our relationship, but!” Uma held up her hand as Harry gave her a wide grin, he deflated a bit and tilted his head “we need to make sure she's gonna be okay with this” Uma motioned between her and Harry “hell we don’t even know if she has feelings for us” Harry looked hurt at that, just wanting to drag you into bed with him and Uma already so he could smother you with cuddles and whatever couples did with their adorable significant others “I know, but we need to play this safe, I don’t want to scare her off”

Harry gave a slow nod, he wanted to do what he always did, rush into an idea with no real plan and just hope he didn’t die. But he would listen to Uma on this, she was a lot better with relationships then he was…well the logical part of them, he was better at feelings and physical stuff.

So the two talked into the night, deciding in the early morning that they would tell (y/n) about their decision on Sunday when Uma was off work.

Their talk happened on Wednesday, by Saturday afternoon Uma was off the isle, having dived through the barrier just before it closed and swimming to Auradon in search of revenge on Mal and to free the vks still on the isle.

It was only after she left that you realized you had fallen for Uma alongside Harry. The piercing feeling in your chest and gut every time you thought about your captain or even just being on the ship or chip shop slapped you in the face as you realized you fucking missed Uma, more than you should have.

You knew Harry missed Uma too, he had shut himself in his room soon after Uma disappeared at cotillion and refused to come out even when Gil asked. It wasn’t till his sister Harriet stormed onto the ship and dragged him out of his room that he seemed to be a little more like his usual self, he also started to hang around you more often and on the nights where you were on night guard duty he would join you, even when he didn’t have to anymore now that he was captain until Uma’s return.

Your mind was a maze, just trying to maneuver your feelings for both Uma and Harry, the feelings you had for Harry had multiplied for Uma, and now you couldn’t even think about either of them without heat rushing up your neck or butterflies rushing around your stomach.

Great, you had a crush/probably in love on the two people who were already “dating” each other, and both of them were so.damn.pretty. You groaned to yourself, covering your face and sinking to the ground in a crouch. Yeah, you had no fucking chance.

On the bright side, it did seem you were getting closer to Harry? So unrequited love aside at least you were getting a friendship out of it? The two of you started hanging out together more often than not, as you had mentioned before Harry joined you on night guard shifts, the two of you continued rope tying practice, started hand to hand combat training, he took Uma’s spot in teaching you how to use a sword, and sometimes the two of you would just…chill, hanging out in the bird’s nest drinking and eating whatever snack or food Harry had found, you leaning against his legs in the cramped space.

About five months after Uma had left the isle, the crew, aka Bonnie and Drey, decided to have a “bonding” night, forcing everyone into the chip shop after closing time, surrounded by rum and leftover food from the day to play truth or dare/seven minutes in heaven.

The rules were if you didn’t want to tell the truth or accept the dare, you had to spin the bottle and play seven minutes in heaven with whoever it landed on, and if you refused to play that, you'd have to take a shot of Desiree’s strongest liquor.

Bonnie, being the one who made the rules, went first, pointing to Gil and asking him truth or dare.

“Truth!” Gil chirped, already halfway through on his fries. Bonnie hummed for a moment and tapped her bottle of beer, trying to think of something good since Gil did tend to blurt out everything.

“who do you have a crush on?” Bonnie finally asked with a teasing smirk, laughing a bit as he pointed at Harry. “yeah, okay we knew that”

Harry blew a kiss towards Gil and Gil grinned and caught it, smacking it on his cheek and going back to his food as the crew burst into laughter. Gil tossed a fish stick into his mouth and looked around the group, pointing at Gonzo.

“truth or dare Gonzo” Gonzo let out a low hum and shrugged.

“dare” he muttered, thinking that Gil wouldn't be able to think of anything that bad. Oh, boy was he wrong.

Gil gave a nasty grin and stood, walking over to the kitchen and rummaging in the fridge for a few moments “oi what the hell are you doing?” Harry yelled, pouting as Gil didn’t answer.

Gil returned with something in his fist, his other hand keeping the unknown object hidden from sight. He stood in front of Gonzo and opened his hands, showing a snake egg. “eat up!”

“OH HELL NO” Gonzo yelped, smacking the egg out of Gil's hand, Drey and Jonas screeching as it smashed against the floor and black goo spread from the destroyed egg. Half the crew scrambled back from the egg, its rancid smell already beginning to spread around the chip shop

“ah Gonzo come on!” Emanuel complained, diving behind Gabe, the two pushing each other away and towards the egg in desperation to get away from it and doom the other to the smell.

You covered your mouth as you held in your laughter, falling to your side a bit and your head hitting Harry's shoulder as he cackled. “okay okay Gil, clean it up, Gonzo, either spin the bottle or drink” Gil begrudgingly cleaned up as Gonzo pouted at Harry.

Bonnie held up the empty rum bottle and wiggled her brows at Gonzo. He glared at her and snatched a shot glass from Desiree and took the shot, gaging a bit as it went down his throat “holy shit that’s strong” he shivered, the rest of the crew booing as he handed the shot glass back to Desiree.

Since Gonzo had forfeited the dare and seven minutes in heaven, Gil went again, this time picking Drey and the girl chose to do truth. “Ummm okay…uh, ever give a blowjob?” the crew whistled and hollered at the speedy turn towards the sexual end of questions and Drey snickered, shaking her head and holding up her hand to her mouth, only her pointer and middle finger around her lips as she winked and stuck her tongue through. “I’ll take that as a no” Gil laughed, taking a sip of his rum and leaning back on his elbows.

“your turn Drey” Bonnie called, stealing a crab cake from Zhao and laying halfway down on the floor, resting her chin in her palm. Drey tapped her chin, looking around the crew before her eyes landed on Yamato, who quickly leaned behind Gabe but was too late.

“Yamato, truth or dare” he kept behind Gabe for a moment longer before he sighed and leaned back to sit straight and looked at Drey in surrender.

“dare” he muttered, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees and chin in his hands. Drey gave a wicked grin and looked around, trying to find something that would best work on Yamato.

“oh! I got it…lick Gabe's foot” the crew yelled out in disgust as Gabe laughed and pulled off his boot, shoving it towards the disgusted Yamato.

“NOPE gimme the bottle, GIMME THE BOTTLE ID RATHER MAKE OUT WITH ANYONE ELSE THAN LICK HIS FOOT GABE GET THAT AWAY FROM ME OR WE WILL THROW HANDS” Yamato shoved Gabe away from him, the cackling pirate falling on his back holding his chest.

Bonnie cackled and pushed the empty bottle of rum into the middle of the circle, Yamato sighed and leaned over to spin it, sitting cross-legged as everyone stared at the bottle in both excitement and anxiety.

Finally, the bottle slowed and landed on Zhao, the crew cheered and the two boys laughed, Zhao biting his bottom lip, squinting his eyes, and raising his brows.

“Alright come on Zhao les make out!” Bonnie stood and ran over to the closet that she had declared “heaven”  the two boys joining hands and swinging them as they walked into the closet and Bonnie closed the door after them.

“have fun~ Gonzo set the timer!” Gonzo leaned over the took the timer/stop watch from where Bonnie was sitting and set it for seven minutes “im so glad that thing is basically soundproof I do not need to hear Yamato moaning” the crew snickered at that, Harry rolling his eyes and leaning towards you.

“five bucks Zhao gives Yamato a handy” you felt your cheeks burn at his low-toned voice and laughed a bit, nodding as he grinned at you.

“you’re on” you whispered, biting your lip as Harry patted your thigh and sat up straight again.

“who’s next?” Jonas asked, taking a swig of his rum and glancing about the room.

“I’ll just go again and when Yamato comes out hell go” Drey waved it off and looked around the room, pointing at Gabe “Gabe truth or dare!”

“Dare” Gabe snickered, falling off balance a bit as Drey pointed at Gil.

“sit in Gil's lap till someone picks you again” Gabe sighed and stood, plopping in Gil's lap and crossing his arms.

Gil didn’t seem to mind, reaching his arm over Gabe's waist to grab his food tray. “all right, Gonzo truth or dare!” Gonzo groaned, having only gone a couple of turns before but chose truth this time “have you ever given head before, doesn’t matter girl or boy just head” Gonzo tilted his head then nodded. the crew, minus you and Harry, wolf-whistled “yooo who!?” Gonzo grinned and shook his head.

“hey, I only had to answer if I have given it before not to who” Gabe pouted and leaned back into Gil.

“party pooper” Gonzo perked up and looked around the group, eyes landing on you, smirking as you shrunk into yourself in an attempt to make yourself invisible

“(y/n) truth or dare” you tugged at your shirt, trying to decide what to do, go with truth, and possibly reveal your crush on Harry and Uma? Be dared to do something embarrassing? Play spin the bottle? Or take a shot?

“um, truth” you squeaked out, Gonzo looking up at the ceiling as he tried to figure out what to ask you. Finally, he snapped his fingers as he looked back at you, having found the perfect question.

“Have you ever had sex? Or been with anyone for that matter?” you shook your head, you were a virgin through and through, you haven't even kissed anyone before. “huh, all right your turn”

You looked around the group, finally landing your eyes on Desiree who had been untouched the entire game “Desiree” she looked up at you, mid-sip on her rum “truth or dare?”

“Dare” she answered immediately, smirking as the crew ‘oooh’d at her. “gimme your best shot (nickname)”

“umm” you had never really…dared anyone to do anything before…this was gonna be tough. “lick the bottom of Bonnies boot” the crew stared at you for a moment as Desiree looked between you and Bonnie wide-eyed “what?”

“holy shit I thought you were gonna like, I don’t know, make me eat twenty crackers or something! But I’ll do it” the crew cheered and Gabe leaned over to give you a high five.

Bonnie lifted her boot into the air and cackled as Desiree just went for it, going sole to toe “AHHHH” Bonnie cackled, falling backward and holding her leg in the air. Desiree backed into her spot again and shook her head, hanging her tongue out of her mouth as she made gagging noises.

“tha’ wath stho groth” she gagged, grabbing a paper towel and scraping her tongue of the taste of Bonnie's boot. after a few moments of the crew laughing at her, along with the timer of Zhao and Yatamo’s seven minutes in heaven beeping, the two coming out of the closet with Messy hair, bruised lips and Zhao’s pants unbuttoned.

Harry pouted at you and took the five out of his wallet, placing it in your hand as you gave him a smug grin. “yeh won tha’ one lass” he laughed quietly, freezing as Desiree locked her eyes on him.

“Harry, truth or dare” Harry kept a staring contest with her, trying to predict what she was going to do.

Finally, he sighed “Dare” Desiree let out a cold cackle, Harry freezing again at it.

“let Gil give you a haircut” Harry immediately shook his head, Gil had cut his hair once before and he ended up with the worst patchy hair cut he had ever had, he only trusted two people with his hair, Uma, and Harriet. “alright then spin the bottle!” Harry sighed, he had a lot of work to do in the morning so drinking wasn’t the best idea so he took the bottle from Bonnie and spun it, mentally crossing his fingers that it would land on you.

You watched as the bottle spun around, pulling your knees to your chest and wrapping your arms around them. You did want the bottle to land on you but at the same time you hoped it wouldn’t land on anybody so you wouldn’t be going behind Uma’s back or so Harry wouldn’t be kissing someone other than you or Uma.

You felt the heat climb up your face as the tip of the bottle landed directly on you, the crew whistling and cheering as you buried your face in your knees. “wooooooo come on you two! Get to the closet.” Harry glanced at you and while he really wanted to go into the closet with you, he felt bad as you had completely turned into a ball of embarrassment.

“come on guys she obviously-OI” Gonzo and Jonas grabbed Harry's arms, carrying him to the closet and tossing him in, Drey and Desiree grabbing your hands and tugging you in after him.

They closed the door behind you, Bonnie going the extra mile and locking the door “Have fun~ seven minutes!” Bonnie’s muffled voice yelled through the door before it went silent.

You pressed yourself into the wall and sunk to the floor, holding your face in your hands and pulling your knees to your face. “(y/n)?” Harry quietly asked, kneeling in front of you and cupping your face with his hand, pushing your chin up to make you look at him “are yeh okay?”

“I-I just-“ you buried your face again, if you looked at him anymore you would throw your moral compass out the window and just kiss him silly.

“do yeh not like meh?” he asked, feeling a pit form in his chest at the thought of you not liking him in ‘that’ way, he blinked in surprise as you shook your head and looked back up at him.

“no-its, not that, it’s more…I like you…like a lot…more than I should, a lot” you whispered, biting your lip as Harry stared at you, not noticing him glancing at your lips “but you’re with Uma and I don’t want to ruin anything between the two of you even if it's just a dumb game and I don’t want to ruin our friendship with my dumb feelings even though I just blurted out every-“ you were stopped by a soft pair of plush lips,  and in the dark of the closet you saw Harry very very close to your face, his eyes closed and hands gently cupping your jaw.

You decided to just let yourself enjoy the next seven minutes and closed your eyes, pressing back ever so gently back into Harry…your brain reminded you that Harry was your first kiss and you smiled, helluva first kiss if you did say so yourself.

Harry pulled back slowly and you fluttered open your eyes, biting your lip as Harry gave you a soft smile “yeh wouldn’t be ruining anything between Uma an’ I, we both like yeh and actually” Harry let out a nervous chuckle “we were goin’ ta ask yeh ta’ join our relationship a couple months ago but…Uma left before we could tell yeh…we were planning ta ask yeh the weekend that ended up filled with all the beasty boy stuff…” Harry hoped that you wouldn’t reject Uma, he loved both of you and he didn’t want to have to lose one to keep the other.

“I…Uma-“ you leaned forward, burying your face in Harry's shoulder “I like Uma too” you whispered into his shoulder, squeaking as Harry picked you up by your thighs and pushed you against the wall, his hips pressing into yours.

Harry smiled at you, pressing another kiss to your lips “good, we can have fun when she gets back okay?”

You whimpered into the kiss, nodding as he pulled back “okay” The two of you spent the next seven minutes exchanging kisses and feeling the room heat up as Harry continued to press his hips into yours.

You were soon interrupted by Bonnie yelling through the door “Times up you two!” Harry groaned and set you back on your feet, letting you hang on to him as you balanced on wobbly legs.

Harry knocked on the door, Bonnie quickly unlocked it at that and swung it open, giving the two of you a smug grin before her shoulders dropped

“oh come on it's like you didn’t do anything!” Harry rose his brow; he had bitten your neck and dry-humped you did it really seem like he did nothing? He turned to look at you, raising his brow as he realized you had quickly fixed yourself up and the only evidence to your heated time in the closet was your heated cheeks. “All right come on, Zhao’s on a dare right now and Gabe drank a shot”

You and Harry glanced at each other then back at the crew, walking out of the closet and taking your previous seats next to each other, Harry's arm now resting behind your back.

Things changed after that, the small conversations at night turned intimate, faces always close together and bodies touching, breath mingling, and Harry's lips pressing against your lips or neck every so often. Practicing knots went from sitting across from each other with Harry instructing you to you and Harry sitting so close your knees touched the inside of his thighs, his hands ever so gently guiding your fingers through the motions and his voice soft.

He started to pull you away at random moments to a hidden corner and curl himself around you, pressing his lips to yours with the others oblivious to your recent activities.

The two of you hadn't gotten to resume your session from the closet, leaving you frustrated and needy. You honestly just wanted Harry to ravish you until the sun came up.

What you didn’t know was that Harry was feeling the same way, frustration building in his body every time he looked at you, eyes burning into your lips and body, just wanting to drag you to his room and show you a whole new world. He thought of you every night, almost stomping to your room and taking you but holding himself back.

It was just getting too much for both of you, so one night, when Harry knew neither of you had anything to do the next day, snuck to your room and knocked gently on your door, not wanting any of the crew to hear knowing you wouldn’t want everyone to know your business.

“Harry?” you whispered, looking around the dark halls of the ship as Harry stared down at your lips, your body barely covered with only a loose shirt and some sweat pants “what's wrong? It's like, 2 am?” Harry leaned in and pressed his lips to yours passionately, curling his hands around your face and humming into it as you pressed back needingly.

He pulled back, just enough for your breath to mingle “darling” he purred, enjoying the way you squirmed at the tone of his voice “do yeh want to continue our little session from the closet?” he grinned as your eyes went wide and you nodded erratically. He pressed a quick kiss to your lips and grabbed your hand, pulling you out of your room and closing the door, the two of you sneaking back to his room.

That night was filled with heated kisses, whispered confessions, and bruised hips.

Everything changed again after that, the soft hidden kissed behind corners turned to heated make-outs, you still had soft kisses but more often than not it was passionate. You slept in Harry's room more often than not, not to have sex but simply because you liked being with him and him you. Your midnight talks being shoulder to shoulder turned to you being engulfed in Harry's arms and sitting between his legs as you talked about whatever you wanted. The practice tiring ropes became teasing, Harry sneaking kisses whenever he could

Harry went deeper into himself, and you learned almost everything from his favorite drink to his deepest fear, and he told you about Uma as well, letting you get to know her through another and you fell for both Uma and Harry more each day.

And you told him what you could, from your favorite color to your most embarrassing moment, it was…bliss, well as blissful a relationship could be on the isle.

About a year after the two of you got together, you watched as Harry and Gil dove through the barrier just as it was closing after the core four and Celia, messing with your bracelet nervously as you watched Gil and Harry fight with Carlos and Jay. Harry forced a blue gem out of Mal's hand and it soared over the water, Mal letting out a small scream before a turquoise tentacle reached up and caught it.

Your breath caught and you let a grin grow on your face “Uma” you whispered out, bouncing on your feet as Uma rose out the water, looking even more beautiful than the last time you saw her. Harry looked directly at you, the same feeling you had at seeing Uma swimming in his eyes.

Uma was back.

After Uma submerged into the water and sent a tunnel of water up and splashing the vks, she reappeared on the other side of the bridge, holding up the glowing gem Mal had been holding.

A few minutes of negotiating later, with Mal being stubborn as always, the vks were off to do whatever they were off to do, you didn’t know, the most you had heard was Mals muffled scream of ‘no’

Uma suddenly glanced back, her eyes sparkling with excitement as she looked at you. You gave her a grin and waved back, you guessed Harry had told her about the two of you and you hoped to hades that you would see them again and be able to kiss Uma finally.

-

Only a day later, in the early morning, Harry and Uma stepped into his room, Harry gesturing to his bed where you were sleeping curled up in one of his shirts and his blankets.

“aw,” Uma cooed, walking over to you and caressing your cheek, flinching back as your eyes snapped open and you sat up, a bright grin growing on your face as your vision refocused and you saw Uma.

“Uma~!” you squealed, launching yourself at her and tossing the two of you onto the ground, Uma chucking underneath you as her head was pinned to your shoulder. “you’re back!”

Harry smiled as you and Uma hugged on the floor “so Harry tells me you like both of us? And want to be with both of us?” Uma asked, sitting up with you in her lap.

Your face burned slightly but you nodded, smiling as Uma cupped your cheeks “good, but just so you know I will always choose sea ponies over both of you” you and Harry burst into laughter, a smile growing on Uma’s lips as she watched two of her three favorite people laugh.

“Harry already told me that part of the contract” you teased, leaning in and pecking Uma’s cheek, snickering as she froze and stared at you “what? I can’t kiss my girlfriend~?”

Harry chuckled and kneeled next to you and Uma, wrapping his arms around you and whispering in your ears “I think Uma’s bed is a bit better to fit all three of us eh?” you grinned, Uma’s face burning as she saw Harry wiggle his brows.

“I leave a virgin first mate and a shy oblivious crew member and come back to two horndogs…Christ remind me to never leave yall alone again”

“noted” you and Harry sang in unison, Uma laughing at it and shaking her head.

“Alright come on, let's go to my room.” you and Harry grinned, your arm going around Uma’s and grabbing onto her hand as Harry tossed his arm around her shoulder and the three of you walked into Uma’s room.

To which Uma was very VERY glad her room was soundproofed a long time ago.

-end-

side note with the smut, this was 50 pages and 15,676 words, without the smut its 32 pages and 9943 words which is still a lot but woza, like, 16 pages of the fic was dedicated to smut XD 

permtaglist

@queer-cosette @sephiralorange (thank you for beta reading the smutty version don worry ill link the full version lol) 

@lunanight2012 @daughter-of-the-stars11

@musicarose @rintheemolion

@jatp-rules-my-life @verboetoperee

@thecaptainsgingersnap @random-thoughts-003

@remembered-license @imtryingthisout

and because you asked me too since i used the crew names you created @askauradonprep​

[alovesthis]

all of those things // sam wilson

all of those things // sam wilson oneshot (also on my AO3 - pinned on my tumblr)

summary: Every single thing about Sam Wilson had made your stomach flutter with uncontrollable butterflies. The way he spoke and carried himself. His bright smile and the way he laughed. All of those things are what made you fall in love with him. But, you had some questions on why and how he loves you -- which leads Sam confessing every single thing he loves about you.

word count: 3.3k 

warnings: none

requests: send me a message, or an ask on my tumblr! I don’t have any prompts, but feel free to send me any ones you have on your mind! Marvel, SPN, Peaky Blinders. Just note, I’m currently mostly writing MCU characters!! specifically, Sam, Bucky, Steve... 

newly edited; may 24th 2021

Every single thing about Sam Wilson had made your stomach flutter with uncontrollable butterflies. The way he spoke and carried himself. His bright smile and the way he laughed and how it reached to his eyes. All of those things are what made you fall in love with him, but falling in love with your best friend was tricky.

For years you both stood in touch despite how many states you lived from one another. After Sam came back home and started living in D.C, you got a job there and he was fucking thrilled. You struggled to find a place to live, despite Sam’s efforts to get you to move in with him, as you wanted to do things on your own. But when it got extremely difficult, you gave in. How hard could it be to live with your best friend?

When you first asked yourself that, you didn’t really think anything of it. It was easy for the first few months. He was a clean person, kept things organized and had a great set up with his record player. That was one of the many things you adored about him. His love for music and the way he would always show you music you’ve never listened to. The way he’d cook breakfast early in the morning for you before the two of you went off to work. The way he’d say ridiculous jokes and laugh the hardest.

There wasn’t a thing you didn’t hate about him, or dislike. Sure, as best friends you’d annoy the shit out of each other from time to time. But, it never made you want to be without him. Even when times got rough, he was still there for you even if he was the one to make you upset. That was just the type of man Sam Wilson was; caring and the utmost loving human being. He’d gone through a lot, and that was an understatement.

Before The Snap even happened, you were scared you lost him forever. He was helping Steve find Bucky with some others and you had to stay on the sidelines, helping them find places of safety and running from everyone who wanted their hands on Bucky and them. You went months without seeing him because of that. And when The Snap happened, Steve came to you and explained everything. It hurt you because you knew that was going to happen: losing Sam.

Those five years were the longest years of your life. Family members dying, moving and you on your own in the apartment. It made a huge difference with the most warm person you knew was gone. Everything was cold and empty, no smile that could light up the room was there to be seen. No contagious laugh or someone to confide in. No more Sam. Although you two have been apart in life because he went on his tours, something was different about him being gone. No communication, no location. But still, the feeling you’d never see him again would linger in your heart, heavy on your mind. The picture frames were still there to remind you of him and all the memories you’ve shared.

Sometimes, staring at pictures of the two of you and listening to his favorite records made you cry. It made you regret that you never got to tell him you loved him. More than a friend, more than just because you were grateful for him. It was because you were utterly in love with your best friend.

For years, you couldn’t stand to be alone. And Sarah, his sister, knew how much you were suffering alone. No job, no immediate family around...so she made you pack up some stuff and move down to Delacroix to Sam’s childhood home. Sarah, and pretty much everyone who knew you and Sam, knew how you felt about him. And although you were oblivious to how Sam felt towards you, everyone knew how he felt about you. They all saw it. The way the two of you would brighten up either of you walked in a room. The way no one else took his place or yours.

During the five years he was gone, you would hang with Sarah and her kids. You were back and forth between D.C and Delacroix from time to time, whenever you could afford it. She never liked to ask for help, but you helped out because you wanted to. Sarah was a sister to you, and those kids were something special. Watching them grow up when Sam was gone, they reminded you of him. So did Sarah.

When Sam came back, there was no wasting time jumping in his arms. After the final war with Thanos (Sam told you everything about it), there was Tony’s funeral. Natasha’s. Everyone came together, including you. If that wasn’t enough to make things and everyone feel down, Steve left and it broke Bucky. Sam was in for a surprise when he was handed the shield.

For months, Bucky left and you and Sam went back to Delacroix. Although he went back into working after being pardoned, you worried for him and Bucky. You didn’t want them to overwork themselves and jump back in after fighting and running for so long.

But as you looked out for Sam, you realized he was okay. Even if you were worried about him every day (I mean come on, he’s your best friend), you knew that Sam was never to keep things bottled up. It was rare, but right now he told you he was fine but if he needed someone, he’d obviously come to you. As time went on, he went on missions. You stood back, working at home (in Sarah’s house) as a journalist for credible news sources in New York and D.C. Although you were grateful to have this family and them letting you stay, you were missing Sam too much. Sure, he wasn’t working everyday 24/7, but there were missions where he was gone an entire week.

After talking to him one night about it, he saw how concerned you were. He would change his schedule slightly, in order to make sure he wasn’t ever becoming work obsessed. He knew your family as a kid would be so invested in their careers, that you were somewhat neglected a childhood.

The things he’s done for you made you swoon for him. Sometimes, it made you feel guilty and selfish for asking for more time with your best friend. As you confided in him about little things like that, Sam would laugh and reassure you that you shouldn’t ever feel selfish or sorry for wanting him to be around.

He started taking it easy on work. Not only because you felt like he was working too much, but because the family business was struggling and he wanted to help out a lot more. This led to family time, which Sarah and you gossiped about while packaging plates for customers. Sarah would argue that Sam working is fine, and it’s better that he’s away from home. Although she understood your feelings for him (you didn’t think she knew, but Sarah had really good intuition), she didn’t want you or Sam to worry about the business, boat or home.

So yeah, he still kept taking time off work but that meant his missions were more tough and extremely longer than most. Even though that was a change, there were still those nights you both cherished. The ones where it was just you two, alone, staying up all night watching the classics you two both loved.

He caught you staring at him one night. Sitting on the couch together watching the third movie of the night. You stared at the way his smile made his cheek bones prominent, the way it reached his eyes. He would huff out laughs and his sculpted body would move up and down. You didn’t realize you were staring so hard, until he turned his head to react to a joke from the movie.

Your cheeks were set on fire and you were utterly embarrassed. The way his wide smile began to slowly fade as he watched your eyes glare down to his lips and back up to his eyes. Coughing, you quickly turned back to the screen with your breath hitching in your throat. You bit your lip and began bouncing your leg in anxiousness. Trying to watch the movie, you felt Sam’s stare burn through the side of your face.

“What?” Sam smirked.

“What?”

“What’s going on?” He asked softly. You didn’t answer, which makes him sigh and grab the remote so that the movie didn’t distract you. “Y/N?”

“Nothing. It’s nothing.” You stood up, hesitating whether or not you should head to bed or sit back down. “I’m gonna go to bed. I’m just exhausted.”

Sam had this thing about him. He knew when people were having a hard time, and he knew much better than to just let you walk away without letting you talk things out with him. He gripped on your wrist and pulled you down to the couch. You let out a tired sigh, and fell into his side.

“You gonna keep sighing or are you ever gonna tell me what’s wrong?”

“It’s been so hard these last few months.” You gulped, hoping it would stop you from being over emotional.

“You came back after all these years, fought against Thanos and Steve left the shield to you. And then you didn’t take it, so I thought maybe you would’ve taken it easy for a while. I worry about you every day, every time we’re not together. I kept trying to tell you every chance I had, but I scared. I got mad at myself for not telling you, but I was scared if I did I would ruin everything. I got mad at myself because I knew if I didn’t tell you, I could probably lose you one day on a mission and you’d never know…Sam, I-I’m-”

The nerves shoot up and down your body, making you anxious

“Hey, hey…” He pulled your hands from your face, making you look at him. “Tell me what? Is everything alright?”

Sam’s heart starts to drop in his stomach, worried that something was wrong and you didn’t tell him a thing about it.

“I’m in love with you. I really, always...truly love you.” 

You spilled your heart out, embarrassingly so, you try to leave his grasp. But he doesn’t let you go. He wants to listen, he wants to make sure you know that he feels the same way. So, he does.

He said your name lovingly, “I love you.”

Stunned, you tilt your head trying to make sense of those three little words you had no idea he’d say to you...in that way. He waited for your response, biting back a smile as he thought it was cute that you were flustered.

“I can’t...you?”

“Talk it out, baby, that’s alright.”

You swooned at the nickname, your heart pounding against your chest. Leave it up to Sam Wilson to make you melt by just speaking.

“I can’t believe you love me.”

Sam laughed lovingly, “What? Why’s that?”

“Fuck, I said that out loud.” You hid your face in his chest. The heat rises into your cheeks as you squeezed his biceps in embarrassment. “Sam, I’m serious. I just-”

“Look at me.” He tugged on your waist. His hand had started to glide from your hip to your jaw, caressing it gently. “Come on, I’ve loved you since we were kids. I thought all the flirting and back and forth was obvious! I love you now and I’ll continue to love my girl forever.”

Your eyes shoot up to his.

“Yeah, my girl.” He smiled, his eyes flickering down to your lips and back to your eyes. “This explains a lot too.”

“What?”

“Never bringing home anyone. Dates, sure. But the fact that we both knew inside we couldn’t bring anyone home, or came up with excuses.”

“You came up with excuses not to bring anyone home? Or date people? Jesus, Sam...why?”

“You’re telling me you haven’t?” You shook your head at him. “I thought so.”

“But why?”

“You really gotta ask me why?” He sighed, raising his eyebrows in concern. “Oh baby. I was gone for a second, but I lost years and so did you. I can’t ever imagine how that must’ve been for you, or Sarah and the kids. I’ve been thinking a lot lately, more than ever, about how the life I had before Steve walked in my life. All the people we had to fight, and save and run for our lives….That was hard. Being away from you for so long that sucked.”

“It did. So, I guess we both know how it feels when we’re away from each other for so long.”

“Yeah, and that made me realize I don’t want to waste anymore time. I love you because it’s always been you. The people I’ve met, all those dates or whatever they were: it didn’t work because they weren’t you. No one can even amount to you.”

You shook your head, “No, Sam. I’m not that special-”

“Don’t do that. Don’t think you’re not. Don’t do that self deprecating thing, because I know you know how I’ve seen you. How Sarah sees you, how those kids look up to you. Shit, even Bucky sees you. He won’t return my calls or texts, but somehow you get through to him. You’re special. The way you have the strength to get up early in the morning with me before I head off to work. I mean, who would really wakes up at five in the morning for someone and they don’t gotta wake up for another four hours?”

“You’re the only person I’d wake up early for.”

“See. It’s little things like that.”

“What?” He squinted at you, a smirk playing on his face.

“I mean...no matter what you do, or where we are. I just, it’s those things that made me fall for you. Much to my surprise, I didn’t think I’d ever tell you. Or even hear those words come out of your mouth.”

“Why?”

“For starters, you’re my best friend and probably the closest thing I have to a family. I didn’t want to jeopardize that. Not only that but just...I’m just me.”

“That’s right. You’re just you.” Sam said, pulling you into him.

“That’s why I love you.” You shrugged. “You let people know that they’re good, that they’re beautiful.”

“You’re just as caring and filled with compassion.”

“Yeah, but there’s only one Sam Wilson.”

“That’s true.” Sam laughed. “And there’s only one you. That’s what makes you unique, and that’s what makes you the woman I love.”

“Sam.”

Everything about you, from the way you woke up with him in the early mornings, to late night movies, cooking together was things he loved about you. From the way you passionately spoke about the things and people you cared about. The way you fumble over your words during a joke always made him laugh. The way you would stay up for him after his long missions and work, to make sure he was physically and mentally alright.

It was the little things and the big things in life that you did that made his heart grow even fonder of you by the day. And now, now that he had you here in his hold confessing your love to him...he really couldn't believe it.

He moved one of his hands to hold on your waist, as you sat together on the couch. He loved the way you said his name. Whether it was Sam, or Samuel, or Wilson when you were angry...or even when you called him Falcon in amusement, his mind couldn’t keep up with his heart that kept beating faster everytime he was with you.

“Y/N…” He said, matching your tone.

“You always know the right things to say, huh?”

“Yeah, and the truth.”

“Can’t argue with that.”

He laughed, then moved his fingers on your waist to comfort you. 

“Listen, I could list every damn thing and reason why I love you. Trust me, that list is endless. It’s always been you that’s made me feel things I’ve never felt for anyone, you know? The way you look in the morning, or anytime of day really. Your lips...whenever you’re concentrating on something you do that really damn cute scrunch of your face. You know, the one where your nose scrunches and your lips are pulled to the side. The way you listen to me. Whether it's my jokes, or going on and on about shit or just letting me open up to you. How could I not fall in love with my best friend?"

You closed your eyes, listening to the way he spoke. That’s another thing: his voice. Whether it was when he was joking around, or tired, or flirting...that voice made you feel more things for him than you’ve ever felt.

“Every, goddamn thing about you is what I love. Because it’s you.”

Suddenly, you felt his hand on your cheek and you open your eyes to stare up at him.

“You’re really warm.”

“You have that affect on me.”

“I know I do.”

You rolled your eyes at his confident flirting. Before you could even respond, his other hand is cupping your jaw. His lips gently grazed yours, slowly waiting for you to make the next move. But the fluttering in your stomach made you too nervous to even move. He caught on and with a faint smile, he leaned in more. You felt like you were frozen, in a dream. Your mind is still caught up in the ‘holy fuck my best friend, sam fucking wilson is kissing me.’ After a few seconds, he pulled away to rest his forehead on yours.

It stood silent between you too. Sam waiting for you to relax and realize what had just happened. He lets out a breathy laugh when he felt your hands start tugging on his shirt, asking him to come forward again. Your lips are instantly on his, and you finally feel it. The connection that pulls you into him, the love that you’ve felt for him for years.

Those butterflies in your stomach flutters up into your heart. Everything you’ve read, watched or heard suddenly starts to become true. There’s this wholesome feeling knowing you’re finally kissing this man you’ve had a crush on since you were kids. But then, there’s this loving and intense feeling that pulses throughout your body. His mouth opens slightly, allowing you to explore his. The nerves start up again, but you push them away once you feel confident enough.

Your lips detach from his for a second, and you both let out each others names in a low whisper. He felt it too. The way you were both vulnerable around each other more than other time. The way you both finally got those feelings off your chest, speaking them to each other.

Sam kissed you once more, just a peck but enough to make you feel weak all over. It was soft, but you felt him giving his all to you. And as he pulled away, it left you breathless and clinging tightly on his thick biceps.

“The things you do to me.”

“I could say the same thing.”

You leave a kiss on the side of his mouth, to tease him and for your own satisfaction. No words are spoken for the rest of the night. It gave you and Sam the opportunity to relax into each others arms.The two of you let out a relieved laugh, falling back into the couch together. He lets his hand wander from your head, down to your back, soothing you and making sure you know everything that had just happened was real. If you had the option of kissing him for the rest of your life, you would.

But right now, being in his arms and knowing that he loves you back, can suffice.

[p---ink]

White.

Author’s Note: First Chris Oneshot. It was supposed to be a blurb/drabble, but I think its a bit too long for that now. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this filth. Also you ever get that feeling, where you feel like you've came up with an idea in your head originally, but also feel like you may have seen it somewhere else? Yea that's how I feel about this piece. So if you've read something similar to this, please link it and let me know so I can edit or delete this post altogether.

Summary: Chris greets you after a long day at work, with some TLC.

Word Count: 2.9k.

Warning: Fluff and Smut. Oral (female receiving), fingering, Semi-mean Daddy Chris, over-stimulation, multiple orgasms, and I think...maybe that’s it? Please let me know if I forgot something.

Disclaimer: Gif is not mine. 

“The kids are asleep?” You whispered, when he held his finger to his lips upon your arrival. 

“Yea, I just laid Ezra down. That is one rowdy little person.” He said chuckling, leaning down to plant a kiss on your mouth. He held you by your waist to pepper more along your face. 

“Chris baby, you are a God-send.” You sighed, leaning in to his touch. “You will not believe the shitty day I had.”

“Hold that thought and take a seat, doll” he ordered, urging you towards the living room by your shoulders. “I’ll be right back.” He promised. 

You sighed as you threw your work bag down on the love chair beside you, kicking your shoes off in the process.  When you crossed the room to drop down on the sofa, the weight of today’s events crushed you instantaneously, as you waited for your husband to return. 

You’ve been married for six years, and he’s been good to you for all of them. Great even. He always listened, and almost never complained. How could he when he was usually away, due to his job? 

He was forever busy with filming, press tours and whatnot. It made him feel guilty to leave you and your sons so often. So any time he was at home for a break, he took full advantage. He spent time with his boys, and then the rest with you, spoiling you all with his love. 

Preoccupied with your stress, you almost failed to notice Chris taking a seat in front of you. He took hold of one of your legs, and that’s when you noticed your spa-kit placed next to him. 

“Baby, you don’t have to do this.” You cried, scrunching your face in relief when he rubbed your calf in just the right spot.

Chris flashed those pretty baby blues at you, along with that signature smug smirk. “You know I do. And you know I want to.” He said, before dousing his hands with oil. 

As he firmly massaged the coconut into your skin, you couldn’t help but marvel at him. Taking a pillow into your arms to hug, and hide your giddy smile, you reply with, “What I did I do to deserve you?”

“Well I would tell you, but I don’t have enough time, because you’ve got to tell me about what’s got my girl so upset.” He informed you with a stern look that read who do I have to kill? “Before you do that,” he started, placing your newly moisturized leg down before grabbing the other, “Choose a color.” 

You tucked your bottom lip between your teeth, peering over to take a look into the open basket. It had an assorted amount of different nail polishes and products for nail care. Your favorite color currently decorated the bottom of the basket, and it made you recall the time your oldest son Jeremy spilled its contents over while playing a game of “paint” about a week ago. That boy. You thought, shaking your head playfully. Well I guess I won’t be choosing that one. 

After a moment of close examination, and scrutiny, you chose “White”, which made Chris immediately stop his measures against your legs, to peer up at you through hooded lids. 

“So its one of those days, huh.” He smirked. “I was hoping you’d pick that one.”

“What do you mean by that?” You questioned. You hadn’t known he preferred certain colors on you. 

“I’ll tell you later, but first tell me about your day baby.”

He didn’t need to tell you twice. You were dying to get it all off your chest.  You spilled out your hearts content, as your husband massaged your legs, then your feet, and in between your toes. As he delicately removed the old paint from your last session, and proceeded to paint your feet, you were almost finished relaying the message. 

“…and its just like they treat me like I’m insane! But you know what? The way i’m always overlooked, and ignored, makes me feel like I am going insane. Every time I suggest an idea, its stupid. But let some asshat say the exact same thing, and they praise him like a god.” You complain, rolling your eyes, at your memories from your work day. 

Chris offered you the occasional nod or two, humming softly at your cries of frustration when needed. And as much as he wanted to offer his two cents on the matter, he knew that what you wanted most was to be heard. You just wanted to be listened to. And while you wouldn’t of minded him beating their asses, he knew you needed his tenderness. His love. His care. And so that’s what he gave you. 

“And you know why they do it right? It’s because I’m a woman! A black one at that. Lord Jesus, it pisses me off so much.” You sigh, finally bringing your eyes down to him, after they had been trained on the air and nothingness around you; you had a habit of re-living stories as you told them. “But honey, this has really helped out a lot.” You say, cupping his chin lovingly. 

“You know I’ll do anything for you doll. And fuck those sons of bitches. They’re idiots if they can’t see how amazing you are. If you quit, like I suggested a while ago, that’ll really show ‘em.” Chris exclaimed, applying a second coat of white.

“Now you know I love what I do. I just wish I was more appreciated is all!” 

He gave you a sympathetic look before saying, “well you know me and the boys appreciate you.”, running his fingers along the ridges of your toes to remove the misapplied dye on your skin. 

“I know you do baby. I mean look at what you’re doing for me now.” You said, gesturing towards the care he took with your feet. 

Chris just smiled in response. He only felt slightly defeated when you rejected his idea to stay at home. You told him many stories about the jerks you worked with. You were among one of the only women at your company, and you paid for that fact daily. You told him, how they would talk to you, and treat you, even though you had the same amount, if not more experience as they did. He didn’t want you to have to put up with that. He wanted you to kick your feet up and enjoy the life he would provide for you and the kids you both created. But, like the supportive husband he was, he honored your wishes to pursue your passions. He knew that was what made you happier at the moment. The time would come, where he could spoil you completely, though. 

“Speaking of this,” You started, motioning towards your feet once more. “What’d you mean when you said “So it’s one of those days, huh”” You asked, putting on your best impression of him. 

Chris put on a smile that could light up a room, as a deep throaty chuckle erupted from his chest, and vibrated through your body via your feet. “Is that what you think I sound like? No matter, I’ll tell you what I meant. I can predict exactly what it is you need, and how you feel, based on the nail polish color you choose.” He said confidently, picking up a clear polish to apply the final coat.

“Is that right?” You ask, failing to take him seriously, even when he flashed that cocky grin and brow twitch that he often used to back his claims. “You’re so full of shit.”

“Seriously. I can. Listen.” He informed you, opening the clear polish, and brushing the access paint along the insides of the bottle. “I can prove it.”

“Fine! Go ahead.” You state, becoming intrigued.

Delicately holding your left foot against his knee, he starts explaining his theory while applying polish. “You see, when you choose a pale blue or orange, I know you just wanna forget about things with a movie or a cuddle session. Forest green or black, when you feel like throwing a couple of shots back with your girls at a bar. Mauve and a nude of any kind are your favorites, and you request them when you need to feel in control, classy, or sophisticated. And you always choose a soft pink, or yellow, when you need a happy reminder, or a burst of energy and inspiration. Lavender, is a color I wish you’d choose more, since it represents your happiness. Gray, is a color I wish you’d choose less, since it means you’re sad. And then there’s plum purple and candy apple red, two colors I can’t get enough of. You want those, when you’re feeling sexy. See, baby I can read you like an open book.” He declared, moving on to your second foot. Feeling quite sure of himself. 

You just stared at him in awe. Then you realized he didn’t mention, the one he just spent  ten minutes applying. “You forgot about white.”

“Oh I didn’t forget angel.” He corrected, smirking as he finally finished painting both feet. “I’m just waiting on your toes to dry.” After he says this, he begins to sensually blow cool air on your toes. 

“Chris! Tell me what it means!” You pout playfully, growing fed up with his secrecy. Also tickled from the air he blew. 

“Fine. But be quiet, you don’t wanna wake those little demons.” He warned, fixing you with a stern look that made you erupt into quiet giggles. He always made you laugh with his juxtaposed funny-seriousness. He was seriously funny. “White is my absolute favorite. You wanna know why? Its simple, and doesn’t drown out your pretty personality. It goes with every outfit, purse, and hairstyle. You wear this color, when you’re frustrated. Exasperated. Annoyed. You choose white, when you need me to wrap those pretty little legs around my neck, so I can make you cum till kingdom come. Or until you see, ‘white’. Whichever comes first”. He finished, staring at you seriously all of the sudden. A thick silence had befallen the two of you, and you almost didn’t know how to escape it. 

After a moment, you break out into a smile, despite Chris’ unmoving features. “Are you sure that’s what I want? Or is it something you want?”

“It’s what you need.” He affirmed, finally matching your expression, only his smile held a lot more lust than yours. “Tell me I’m wrong.”

“I’ll tell you something alright, Chris. I think you paint my nails entirely too much.”

He lets out a breathy chuckle, moving to pack up the spa kit, before saying “So in other words I’m right.” He rises to his feet, peering down through his long lashes with a knowing grin, before turning to leave the room. But not without saying, “Don’t worry baby, I’ll give you what you need.” Leaving you an anxious mess.

You start squirming in your seat, waiting with anticipation for him to return. You try to sit in your sexiest pose, but it makes you feel awkward. Then you start to wonder if you should remove your underwear. But you know he likes doing that. You even wonder if you smell okay, after such a long day at work. A million thoughts race through your mind, and you barely register his presence when reenters the room. You slightly jump, when you feel his warm hands brush against the nape of your neck.

“Shit baby.” Chris laughs, as he rounds the couch. “I knew it was bad, but I didn’t realize how bad. Let daddy, handle this for you.” He says kneeling back in front of you, knees tucked firmly under his person. He smoothes his hands over the expanse of your soft supple skin, leaving a burning trail of desire in his wake. When he hooks his fingers underneath the waistband of your panties, your breath hitches as the cool air hits your moistened sex. 

You lift your thighs and legs, so he can carefully remove the lace without ruining his handwork on your feet. When Chris surveys your dampened panties and inhales their scent, his grin grows wider. “You’re already this wet for me?” 

He gives you no time to answer as he’s pulling you closer to his face, by your thighs. The sudden movement caused a whimper to escape your throat, soft sound making his cock harden. He’s working his kisses up against your thighs with a quickness, ready to produce more sounds like the last. 

Your head’s position on the couch has you feeling a bit awkward, and you go to say  “This is uncom—” but cut yourself off with a moan, as he dives his thick tongue between your petals, writing love notes against the skin.

“What’s that, doll?” Chris asks, hot breath dangerously close to your bud.

You just mewl in response, wetting his beard with your juices, as he eats you like you’re his last meal. “Right there baby.” You groan, grinding yourself against his mouth when his tongue darts against your nub. 

“Right here?” He questions softly, repeating the same gestures, sending a jolt through your body that makes you buck against his face. 

Your words leave your throat, as he sucks harshly against the problem areas, shocks of pleasure emitting through your person. And just when you thought it couldn’t get any better, he adds his fingers. First two, but then three as he starts fucking your pussy. 

“D-daddy!” You cry, voice coming out shaky as you writhe against his lips and fingers. His actions have you climbing up the couch. 

Then he removes his lips, warning you to keep quiet. “My babies are upstairs, I’m gonna need you to keep your pretty mouth shut.” He commands, placing your soaked panties between your lips. 

As he quickens the pace of his fingers, and makes his tongue dart from left to right relentlessly against your clit, you approach your first orgasm of the night, and he knows it too, when your hole clenches around his fingers. 

He smiles, and tells you how proud of you he is, but he isn’t done with you yet. 

♥︎ ♥︎ ♥︎

Your muffled moans ring through your ears, as you clamp your teeth down around your underwear. Your jaw was becoming slack from keeping it open so long, and you were feeling sore.

Chris was still continuing his assault against your sex. He had long moved from his position on the floor, and now sat beside you on the couch. 

He had your legs sprawled open, keeping them from closing with one hand gripped on your thigh, and the other rubbed fast and hard circles against your clit, while he whispered sweet nothings into your ear.

“What number was that one, baby? Five, six? I lost count after the third time, when you squirted on daddy’s chest.” He growled, biting his lip, as he quickened his pace against your nub. “Do you think you can do that again?”

You moaned in protest, shaking your head from left to right, as you approached another orgasm. You couldn’t take anymore pleasure, your sensitive bud was going through too much.

“What’s that baby? I can’t hear you.” He teased, face as serious as it could be. He was testing you. You knew not to remove the underwear, or you’d be there all night. When you made no moves to pull them out, he did it for you, a string of spit connecting your lips to the fabric.

You immediately pleaded with him to ease up. “Daddy I don’t think I-I can take an-nymore.” You cried, now a blubbering mess.

“You don’t think you can take anymore?” Chris repeated, mocking you. “Well that’s too bad. Daddy thinks his princess looks too pretty when she’s cumming. So suck it up, because I’m not stopping until we have to replace this couch.”

You  felt that familiar coil in your stomach again, threatening to snap, as you threw your head back. You were a sweating mess now. You had hair glued to your face, and neck, and your shirt was drenched, as it clung to your stomach. But still, it wasn’t quite as drenched as your pussy, thighs, and couch cushions were. 

Chris was as hard as a rock, but you knew if you touched him, he’d get angry. He wanted to play with you, until you were begging him to stop.

“What happened today at work again baby? What was it Chad said to you? I bet if I have you fucked out like this every night, I’d be the only man on your mind.” He whispered against your ear.

Your stomach began spasming, as you clenched painfully around nothing. This would be your last one too, before your body gave up. 

Tears streamed down your cheek, as you contorted your face into the sexiest expression Chris had ever seen. And then, just before your screams of pleasure could rip through your chest, he covered his mouth over yours, as you squirted all over his hands, your thighs, and stomach. When you finally opened your eyes, you could only see white, before your vision came back into focus.

Massaging the wet, between your folds, Chris bought his fingers up to your lips and said “open.” And you did, sucking all your juices from his digits without breaking eye contact. “Attagirl.” He praised, wiping your tears away. Feel better now?” He asked, small smirk playing on his lips.

You nod tiredly, throat dry from your previous activities.

He brushes your sweaty hair behind your ears before saying, “Good. Now, let’s paint those pretty pink walls white, too.” 

[missscarletta7]

The Broken Crown- Chapter 1

Hello! So this is my first Peaky Blinders Fanfiction.  I own nothing, except for the few OCs I created. 

This story is also on Wattpad and FF.net under the same title if you want to read it there as well--- however be warned it is not as edited as this post and I changed the name of one of the characters because I thought it was a better fit... lol!

Summary: All Margaret Shelby ever wanted, was the opportunity to write her own story. Only now is she beginning to realize that her brother may have already written it for her...

  Enjoy!

OoOoOo

"He's a ghost, he's a god, He's a man, He's a guru,

You're one microscopic cog, In his catastrophic plan

Designed and directed by his red right hand"

~Red Right Hand~

1919

She had that dream again, the one where she had to decide which door she would open. Both doors were identical in every way. Yet, she just stands in the empty room lit as if by candles; frozen in place; The weight of the decision ultimately waking her out of-

No, that wouldn't do, a dark-haired girl thought as she scratched out the words she had just written down. In a small bedroom on the second floor of number Seventeen Watery Lane, sixteen-year-old Margaret Shelby sat on her bed, or rather the bed she shared with her older sister. Dressed in the long white nightgown that had once belonged to her mother and with a pen in hand, she scribbled down more words in her brown leather-bound journal resting on her lap. The journal was gifted to her by her Aunt Polly on her most previous birthday. Upon receiving it she couldn't wait to fill its pages. She liked writing, ever since she learned how to form her words into a cohesive sentence on paper. It had been an outlet, a distraction from the "shit-hole" that was Small Heath, Birmingham.

As a child, she had the fondest memories of taking the drawings her eldest brother Arthur would sketch and would accompany his rendering with an original story. She took pride in how much he would always be so impressed and relished when he called her “his little genius". As the years passed, she believed if she could write and publish a story that was good enough, then maybe one day she could provide for her family. Give them a way out of their current situation. Not that she knew much of how dire their situation really was. To their credit, her family tried their best to shield her, as well as her youngest brother Finn, from feeling the effects of living a life in the slums. She was lucky in that way, most of the girls her age had dropped out of school and had a child of their own already.

Her thoughts of prose were soon interrupted by familiar sounds causing the pit of her stomach to sink. Even after three months of him being back, she doubted she would ever get used to it. Opposite from her bed, through the thin wall with floral green wallpaper which had been peeling off for years, muffled cries could be heard. Maggie knew exactly who it was, her brother, Tommy.

She placed her journal onto the thin cotton sheets and traveled into the hallway. Before she knew it, she was standing outside the door of her older sibling. Taking a deep breath, she decided against knocking and slowly opened the door.

"Tommy?" she whispered into his candlelit room. She could see he was awake. Lying flat on his back in bed, staring at the ceiling.

"Go back to bed, Mags," the second oldest Shelby ordered, but the girl hesitated.

"I thought I heard yelling," she sounded apologetic, before taking a whiff of the air. "Do you smell that?"

"I said back to your bloody bed," his harsh tone surprised her.

This time she did listen, gently she closed her brother's door and made her way back to the empty bedroom she once was in.

OoOoOo

The next day, Margaret exited the small school she attended that was located right on the edge of Small Heath with her best friend Cara Ryan by her side. The girls had played together for as long as their memories had served them. Cara was a stylish and talkative girl who stood at a height of five feet and six inches. Dazzling green eyes sparkled and her straight honey blonde hair fell upon her shoulders. Her family did better than most, the Ryan's own a dress shop that is very popular amongst the younger women, Ada, in fact, is a frequent customer of the establishment. Though the word 'customer' was a loose term, the Ryan's like most shop owners in the area were obliged to give anyone with relations to the Peaky Blinders whatever they wanted. Mrs. Ryan's and the two oldest sisters operated it, and in her spare time, Cara could often be found working in the backroom, sewing buttons and beads to fabrics. The family had a deal, in a year's time Cara would come to work for the shop full time, but until then Cara could continue her education.

"Can't believe Henrietta's having a baby," Maggie said aloud, as shorter and younger students ran past them excitedly.

"I can," Cara replied smugly. "That girl would open her legs up for any sod that gave her a second glance."

"I feel bad for her." She admitted thinking of the fifteen-year-old whose life was now forever changed.

Cara shook her head, "Don't it's her own bloody fault."

After rounding the corner, they both saw Ross Murray. A thin nineteen-year-old with dark hair standing at five feet and eleven inches, resting his back against the dull red brick wall, smoking a cigarette. Cara stopped them in their tracks and waved at the young man. "All right, Ross?!"

Maggie smiled at her friend, she liked Ross, he'd always looked out for her and Cara like they were his own sisters. They had all been in school together up until the moment Ross was kicked out for beating up another boy named Jonah Smith. In all likelihood Jonah may have had it coming. He never had the ability to let go. For example, just last year Maggie would have to constantly have to turn down his advances for over a month. Due to the reputation of her family, attention from boys was a rare occurrence. Which she didn't mind, she never really felt romantic feelings for anyone. However, Jonah took advantage of her brothers absence. One day he even cornered her when she went back to the classroom to grab the jumper she left behind. Thankfully Jonah eventually stopped, and never bothered her again.

Getting kicked out of school didn't seem to bother Ross though. Once he turned eighteen, he enlisted to help with the war effort. He completed basic training within the required three months, and according to the letters he would send her and Cara, he was held in high esteem with all of his commanding officers. Just as he was about to be shipped to France, an armistice was declared. He'd managed to find a job working at the BSA factory rather quickly, but when he came back into town Maggie could tell he had changed. He now had this mentality that made him seem as though he was ready for a battle, yet had no one to fight.

"Cara, Margaret," he acknowledged, stubbing out his cigarette on the bricks he had rested his back upon "Where are you two heading, aye?"

"Just going home," Maggie told him, readjusting the bag on her shoulder.

He came closer to them, "I'll walk with you. Birmingham hasn't been the safest place now that all these blokes with fucked up brains are back."

"Look at that Mags," Cara said happily, and he allowed her to take his arm. "The only gentleman in Small Heath"

Maggie smiled knowingly at the sight. Since Cara was ten years old, she had been smitten with the dark-haired boy. Cara would frequently turn down other offers in hopes that Ross would one day ask her to be his girl. They both hoped that it would happen soon, because in Cara's words "She wasn't getting any younger".

"Don't know what you two keep going to school for," He expressed to them, as they began to walk in the direction the girls needed to travel. "What more is there to learn?"

His comment made Maggie shrug, "It's something to do."

"Yeah, most girls our age who aren't in school are either whores or mothers." She agreed.  "Or both."

They continued chatting about their school day as they walked closer into town. The canal that ran nearby as well as the different establishments were coming into view. "Mags, is that your brother?" Ross asked, pointing to a couple of boys.

Maggie turned her head to where her friend was pointing. He was right, her younger brother Finn, was running around in front of the pharmacy with Isaiah Jesus. He must have skipped school again. "Oi!" Maggie called out angrily, and Finn froze in place "What have you been up to all day, hm?"

"Please don't tell Tommy," the ten-year-old begged.

Maggie was about to tell him off, but she was caught off guard by the arrival of a person exiting Compton's, "Ada?"

"Oh, hello." The dark-haired beauty clutched the paper parcel tighter in her hands, clearly caught off guard by the sudden appearance of her younger siblings. "Heading home then?"

Maggie nodded and Ada continued, "I'll join you." The older sister then turned to her brother "Right Finn?" The boy scowled, but nodded all the same.

"I'll see you tomorrow," Maggie told her friends, still trying to process what her sister was up to.

Cara didn't seem to mind her best friends' announcement to depart. Turning to the hazel-eyed boy she asked, "Fancy accompanying me to the confectionery?"

He looked over to the Shelby family first, "Will you three be alright by yourself?"

Ada looked amused at his worry, "We'll be fine. I doubt anyone would mess with us." He accepted her answer with a nod and led Cara to the candy shop.

As the water rushed in the cut, Ada and Maggie walked down the sidewalk arm in arm. Finn wasn't too far in front of them. He was running and jumping around like a madman. That boy always had so much energy, Maggie found herself thinking. No wonder he skipped school, the poor thing probably could not sit still.

"That Murray boy has aged well hasn't he," Ada commented, finally breaking the silence, "Have you two?"

"Ada!" The younger sister cried out in surprise.

"Just asking." She shrugged, "Jesus you're a prude"

"Everyone's a prude compared to you" she retorted, "What were you doing at the pharmacy?"

Ada didn't reply though, instead opting to purse her lips. They were almost home now; Maggie could even see Pol heading to the house, traveling towards them. She was about to wave at her aunt until she was distracted by Finn, who ran around in front of his sisters. Her heart clenched when she noticed a black metal object in his hand.

"Finn, where did you get that gun?" she questioned, yet the youngest Shelby only giggled in response. 

"Oi! Quit messing around," Ada scolded, moving forward in an attempt to take the weapon away. "You shouldn't b-"

BANG! The sisters screamed and Aunt Polly, who had witnessed the whole event transpire, rushed over from down the street. Both the girls tried to catch their breath and a shocked Finn looked like he was trying to mentally process what had just happened. 

"The hell were you thinking?!" Polly scolded, snatching the gun from his hand. "Where did you get this?!

"He nearly fucking killed me!" Ada screeched pointing to her brother.

"I-I found it on the sideboard of the shop." Finn spit out as they watched his face concave and he soon began weeping in fear. "I-I thought it was empty. I'm sorry I didn't mean to-"

His tears pulled on Maggie's heartstrings, but Polly wasn't having it. She pushed the sobbing boy towards Maggie ordering, "Take him home, and no more playing with guns. Next time you leave them be." 

The young boy nodded and allowed his sister to lead him back home."I didn't know Mags, I swear" he cried out again.

"I know you. You can apologize to Ada once she's feeling more forgiving" she expressed, her arms wrapped around his small shoulders.

OoOoOo

Childhood had molded her into the person she had become. Now she understood that...

Maggie internally groaned and scratched out what she had just written. No, that was definitely not good enough. She was pulled out of her thoughts when she heard a chuckle. Her eyes were taken off the page by Ada, who was getting ready for her date with some mystery man.

"What's so funny?" the younger sister grumbled.

"You," Ada smiled as she brushed her hair in front of the small vanity mirror, "And how seriously you take yourself."

Quickly she closed her journal, wanting to change the subject "So, what was the family meeting about?" Maggie asked, not genuinely curious.

"New copper’s coming to town," Ada replied unbothered, more interested in fastening her shoe buckle.

"When I went downstairs, I caught Finn trying to listen through the door. Told him off for eavesdropping," the younger sister snickered .

"Can you believe that little tosser?" Ada said, putting on her paste earring. "I don't know what's gotten into him lately. He could have killed me today!"

"It was an accident, Ada." She reasoned, opening her journal once more, "Pol already told him and John off, what more can you do?"

"I can still bitch," the older sister huffed, before looking at the book in her sisters' hands. "Are you ever gonna tell me what you're writing about?" Ada asked pointedly, now completely dressed in a white fur coat that rested over her dress.

"Are you ever gonna tell me who you've been going out to see the last few months?" Maggie shot back jokingly. 

Ada responded by pantomiming the locking of her lips, which only made the younger sister smile. "Cover for me?"

"As always," The girl assured Ada before she quietly opened and closed the bedroom door.

It was about an hour later when Maggie began to hear the familiar muffled cries. Feeling hopeless as she stared at the green papered wall.

OoOoOo

The following day was mostly uneventful for Margaret. She'd gone to school and heard all about Cara's "date" with Ross. According to Cara, he was a complete "gentleman", much to the blonde's disappointment, though she still clung onto hope. 

Now she stood in the kitchen with her Aunt and sister making dinner, continuously kneading some dough until her skinny arms began to burn. Hopefully, this batch of bread would last long enough for her to enjoy. Last time she made bread her siblings had eaten it all, not saving any for her. Upon hearing the door slam, she and her aunt stopped to glance over to the door.

"Holy Shit!" The girl exclaimed, witnessing her eldest brother who was bloody and beaten, being assisted by John into a wooden chair.

"Finn, go find Tommy and tell him what happened," Polly commanded. Like a shot, Finn was running out of the room, but not before Pol hurriedly added, "And tell him we need a shit ton of more alcohol!"

Polly then immediately began to gather gauze and rods of wood to make a splint, "Margaret, start heating up water, then cut this cloth up in stripes." Nodding at the directive, the girl began to do just that.

"The fuck happened?" Ada interrogated, arms crossing in front of her chest.

"Was told some of the men found him like this outside the cinema," John explained.

"Do you know who?" Maggie heard her sister continue as she put the kettle over the flame, but Arthur remained silent.

"I'd like to know as well," An aggravated Polly chimed in.

This time Arthur did speak. “That Belfast copper,” the mustached man spit out, "I'll discuss it more once Tom gets here."

They all fell into silence, the only noise coming from Maggie who pulled out a chair to sit next to her brother, and quietly began cutting the cloth Polly left for her on the table. "Do you think this is enough?" Maggie asked her aunt after she finished.

"Should be plenty, love," Pol told her, taking one of the strips to start mending his hand.

"John, wipe the blood out of his eye," Ada told the third eldest sibling who was just watching the ladies scrabble around as they tended to Arthur.

"Since when did you give orders?" John asked incredulously.

"I'm a trained nurse." The sister stated.

Though seeing as John wasn't budging Maggie rose from her seat and began to wipe the blood herself.

"Don't make me laugh. It hurts my face," Arthur joked as Polly bandaged him up. "You're a nurse like Mags here is a writer."

His comment caused more annoyance than Maggie cared to admit. With her index finger, she pressed onto a forming bruise on his cheek with great pressure, instigating a string of curses to come out of the eldest man's mouth.

"Oops," Maggie said insincerely. This caused Arthur to look to his aunt, wondering if any reprimanding would be given to the girl, but Polly just gave her brother a 'like you weren't asking for it' look.

 "I bloody am!" The older Shelby girl whined to John.

"You went to one first aid class in the church hall and got thrown out for giggling," John corrected her.

"Not before I learnt how to stop somebody from choking," she shot back.

"I'm not bloody choking, am I?" Arthur spoke gruffly.

"You will be when I wrap this cloth around your neck." She told him as she poured hot water from the kettle into the bowl.

"Let me see him." Tommy's voice was heard as he entered the kitchen. "Well, have this" Tommy passed the bottle of rum and Arthur took a swig. Grabbing a rag, he immediately got to work tending to his brother's face.

"He said Mr. Churchill sent him to Birmingham. 'National interest', he said. Something about a robbery." Arthur explained. "He said he wants us to help him"

"We don't help coppers," John said immediately, disgusted at the thought.

"He knew all about our war records. He said we're patriots like him. He wants us to be his eyes and ears. I said -" He paused a moment before continuing, "I said we'd have a family meeting and take a vote".

Everyone remained silent, and frankly, that was enough of an answer to the eldest. "Why not? We have no truck with Fenians or communist," Arthur said exasperated, before heatedly asking Tommy. "What's wrong with you?"

Tommy continued to stare back at him, before asking his aunt, "What the fuck is wrong with him lately?"

"If I knew I'd buy the cure from Compton's Chemist," Polly answered, staring at Tom who stared right back.

OoOoOo

Being alone at night was something Maggie had gotten used to now. The cries next door, however, that was something entirely different. Sighing to herself, she decided to give it another go. Once again, she rose from her bed, and ventured into the hallway. This time though she brought her journal with her. Not long she stood in front of her brother's door, allowing herself to open it. 

Again, in the candlelit room, she saw him lying in his bed staring at the ceiling, though she couldn't tell if his eyes were open or not. "Still awake?" she asked.

"Can't seem to fall asleep," Tommy mumbled calmly. She took his stillness as permission to enter.

"Do you remember when I was a little girl and you used to read me books to make me fall asleep?" she asked, moving closer to the bed, "I used to love those voices you'd do for all the different characters from the picture books."

He nodded and he couldn't help the ghost of a smile while thinking of the memory. Unlike his other siblings, Maggie was the only one who would beg him to read to her. It was something they bonded over.

"If you want," she continued, motioning her hand to hold the journal up. "I can read you my story." Tommy was silent as he looked at the journal for a moment, before Maggie added, "I just thought maybe I could try to help you sleep like you did for me."

"Only if you do voices" he stressed jokingly, then shifted his body to make room for her on the small mattress.

"Remember," she squished next to him leaning her back against his bed frame. "This is a work in progress."

"I won't judge you too harshly" he replied, watching her open the journal that lay on her lap.

"Long ago when she was young, she believed that what she saw in her dreams could be a vision of what was to come. It was only now she understood that it was just an amalgamation of-"

"A what?" He interrupted.

"An amalgamation" she repeated. "Do you not know what an amalgamation means?"

"No, I do. Didn't think you did."

"Shut up. You're supposed to allow my words to lull you to sleep."

"Sorry, please continue"

"It was only now she understood that it was just an amalgamation of all her childhood aspirations, fears, and perhaps a little  too much whiskey. With this knowledge she found herself yearning for-"

By this point, Tommy had closed his eyes and was half-listening to the words his sister read from her journal. It wasn't half bad what she wrote. He reckoned by the time she was his age she'd actually make something of herself all with those stories in her head. Perhaps make a career out of it, possibly even get out of Small Heath. It was to be the start of a new decade, a new time, who knows what would happen? When he finally made it back from France, her face was the first face that caught his attention on the station platform. It shocked him. No more was the little girl he would read stories to, but in her place stood a smiling young woman. She had changed so much during the time he was gone.

Come to think of it, they'd all changed. Arthur was head of the family, in charge of the business, and had done a decent job of it. But that was before France, he was different now. He quickly noticed the change in his brother and how he couldn't think straight anymore. Arthur's personality became more explosive, as well as violent. John, well he had become more reckless, especially after a few drinks got into him, and since Martha's passing the drinking had only increased. 

As for him, well he was the one who had changed the most. He used to be carefree, joke and laugh, but now he was more solemn and even more protective of his family. Constantly worrying about how Arthur couldn't handle the business anymore, how John couldn't be alone anymore, and him? Well, he couldn't stand to see his family scrape and scrounge in the slums of Small Heath in order to survive any longer. No, not anymore. New copper sniffing about or not. No matter what Polly said, Tommy saw an opportunity with these guns. He wasn't about to turn it down. He just had to play it smart. As Maggie continued her reading, Tommy could feel himself slowly begin to drift out of consciousness and into a dreamless sleep.

[awanderingdeal]

hello!!! i saw that you were asking for some prompts!! soooo maybe something about leo getting hurt during a game? or maybe something about leo acting his age for once? (we all love that he’s mature but i think it would be fun to see him let loose for once)

Hey anon, we live in a magical world where nobody ever gets injured on this blog so I'm afraid I'm not going to be able to fill that prompt (should probably update my prompt post with that, actually).

I'm very happy with the second suggestion though because this is something I think about a lot. I'm fairly sure this not what you were looking for when you sent this ask, but characterisation is something that I could talk about forever because I am a NERD, so please indulge me.

First a few content warnings: anxiety, food talk and alcohol.

So, the way I write and perceive Leo is actually very personal for me. Not only is he a character that I use to talk about anxiety with, but he is someone I love to explore the idea of 'getting loose' with. I am not a person who lets loose in ways that people may consider to be more traditional. I don't enjoy parties, I hate crowds and spontaneity is just about my worst nightmare. And it took me a long time to realise that was okay. I have fun, I relax, I enjoy myself, it just might look like what other people do to obtain those things. And for me, Leo is a similar character. Yes, he has been forced to mature quickly because of his early start in his career, but he is also just a calm, quiet person who finds joy in the slow life.

If you've done me the kindness of listening to my thoughts, I'd like to offer some headcanons I have related to this topic.

- At first, Finn and Logan worry about Leo's tendency to over research and plan. They know he struggles with his anxiety and they begin to try and avoid the things that have Leo dragging out his laptop and creating new excel spreadsheets, but the come to realise that this is actually a sign that he is excited. Planning and prepping allows him to actually relax, knowing that everything has been covered. Soon, they are sending him itineraries, plotting routes and looking through menus with him before events, enjoying the quiet excitement that is building.

- In another life, Leo would have been a book/studytuber, and the deliveries of new books and stationary are constant. Him and Remus spend hours doing pen bleed test on new journals, face time each other to show one another the new limited edition hardback they just got and Finn listens fondly as he info dumps about the new online planner he just found.

-He loves board games! Leo is crazy competitive and his favourite thing in the world is to invite a few friends round, order takeout and play a game. His cackle as he makes a winning move could actually be considered evil.

-We all know he loves to be in the kitchen and he finds it is the one place that he finds that he can truly relax. He loves to experiment there. At first, he was rigid about following recipes, but now he just throws ingredients in and tells Finn he needs to feel the quantities with his soul. Often Finn and Logan come home to find he surrounded by 12 different versions of the same food and enjoy the fruits of his experimentation.

- Leo loves loves loves water. Baths, swimming pools, the sea, he doesn't care. Natalie teaches him to surf and he loves to dive. Finn is not a massive fan of the sea so Leo gets an underwater camera so he can show Finn all the cool things he discovers.

- He is a drummer. Usually, his technique is perfect, but every now and then he just goes absolutely wild. His sleep schedule is practically non-existent and sometimes Logan finds him playing his electric set at 3 am in the morning and just watches him. Eventually, Leo will notice his presence and usher him and over and sit him in his lap and they play together, even though Logan has absolutely no idea what he's doing.

- He does go to a festival for Logan, and it's almost torturous for him. It's not even that he doesn't like the idea, he's just done within the first hour. One good thing that comes out of lockdown, is they learn that Leo quite enjoys replicating these events at home when he can decide he's had enough and hide in his bedroom. For Logan, it's not the same as the real thing but dancing round the lounge with Leo is definitely one of his favourite things of 2020.

- He doesn't like being drunk, so tends to stick to one or two drinks, but he is pure chaos on the other side of the 'bar'. The team learn pretty quickly that you should sip any drink Leo offers you carefully at first, because lord knows what concoction he has created. When he gets it right though...damn.

- When Leo is impulsive, he is impulsive. These moments always seem to involve either Regulus or Lily, which is hilarious because the three of them are considered the most 'boring', but they will just be like fuck it, let's get matching tattoos and then get swept up in each others planning. Before they know it they have matching ones on their shoulder.

[ethanharli]

Requested: Nah.

Pairing(s): Asra x Top Male Reader

Warning(s): Some Angst, Flashbacks, Mentions of heartbreak, Sudden confession, Cliffhanger, Long, Sister Nadia.

A/n- I brought this over from my Wattpad, and I edited it a bit but this is the longest One-Shot I've ever made, just fifty words away from three thousand :")).

_______________

A frustrated groan slipped past my lips as I fumbled with the sleeves of my costume, it may sound silly but its true. I refuse to wear anything that could reveal my torso, besides my face of course but that's only because its not covered in ink. Now don't get me wrong, the art adoring my body is nothing but beautiful, yet some of its a bit much for the public eye, and I hate attention. Guess Muriel and I are the same in that regard. After adjusting the sleeves I slipped on my rings and emerald necklace that clung tightly around my throat, which didn't bother me in the slightest bit as I drag my pierced tongue over my bottom lip. Finishing up with a few things I quickly locked up my house and headed on my way to the palace, Nadia had invited me over for the Masquerade this year since the last one ended with Lucio and the Devil trying to take over.

I really have to admire that apprentice, their magic is quiet fascinating. With a small smirk I slipped on my wolfs mask, nothing original but the black and vibrant neon of purple and green helping it stand out, even if only by the slightest. The journey to the palace was quite fun, watching people light up fireworks and drink to their hearts content without a worry in the world. Yet it was a whole new world once I entered the palace gates, making my way towards the ball room in hopes to run into my sister, but Nadia is nowhere to be found. "Should've expected as much, she is the Countess after all" I muttered with a proud smile, if only my familiar where here to keep me company but sadly having a grey wolf in this crowd isn't such a good idea, poor thing would be trampled despite her large size.

Taking a glass of wine I sipped it slowly, enjoying the bubbly feeling of it going down my throat. Yet a slither around my ankle caught my attention, and I froze at the sight of a familiar snake, looking up at me with their cute tilted head. "Friend!" Faust cheered, happily slithering up my body to rest on my shoulders, "Yes Faust, it's good to see you again" A pained smile forced at my lips, scratching softly under Faust's chin. If Faust's here then Asra and his apprentice must be close by, I should've expected as much. "Miss you" My heart tightened at the words, forcing the breath out my lungs painfully, and here I thought I could enjoy the Masquerade without running into anyone else, but I guess even an over packed Masquerade can't hide me from them. "I missed you too Faust-" My words were cut off by a familiar voice, merely a couple feet behind me, yelling for the beautiful creature wrapped around my shoulders.

"Im sorry Faust but I really should be leaving, please don't tell Asra I was here alright?" I asked as worry started to pool in the pit of my stomach, however Faust simply tilted her head, watching me curiously. Nevertheless I made a slow pace to the exit, not wanting to rise any sort of suspicion as Asra yells a bit louder. And there he is, my savior. Putting on a small smile I took a drink from a waiters tray, walking up to Julian without seeming any bit out of place, then once the right moment hit I brushed my shoulder against his and shrugged Faust onto him, not once turning back to look at them. However I knew I wasn't out in the clear just yet since a pair of eyes followed me as I left the room.

Being out in the hall felt a lot better then being so close to him. Especially when I'm not ready to face him just yet, hell I don't even think I have the power to look at him without freezing up, how stupid of me to think I could come back here. "[Y/n]?" The sound of Nadia's voice finally got me to relax a bit, letting the tension in my shoulders drop, "Hey Sis, it's been a while" I smiled down at her, watching as her eyes soften before pulling me into a tight embrace that I gladly returned. "Where'd you go? You told me that you were going to talk to Asra after what happened with Lucio and the Devil but it was only him that came back, he said he didn't know where you ran off to and when I tried to ask what happened he'd never answer!" Her crimson eyes glare up at me as they slowly fill with tears that I quickly brushed away.

"Its okay Nadi, Im back now and I plan to stay, I missed my little sister way to much to be gone for so long" I chuckled, trying to lighten up the mood even only for a second, before she looks at my costume with not very well hidden disgust. "You've really never had an eye for fashion have you?" She sighs, taking my hand and dragging me down the hall where Portia was standing. Once her eyes met mine her face lit up in realization, "[Y/n]! You're back!" She jumped up to hug me, which I returned with a ruffle of her long hair.

"Portia could you please get my dear brother to one of the guest rooms so he can change?" Nadi smiled and Portia couldn't have answered any happier, "Yes milady! Now c'mon [Y/n] lets get you a new costume!" She cheered, dragging me away by the sleeve of my shirt. Somewhere in the back of my mind I knew this wasn't going to end well, and by the time I was pushed in the room with a new set of clothing I knew I was right. The clothing was way to revealing for my liking, even though the color and fabric made me look elegant and right at home. The top exposed my arms and most of my chest, the 'V' stopping right above my waist which the pants hugged tightly, yet the rest of it was baggy except the bottom of it, which also hugged my ankles nicely.

But my tattoos and scars were out in the open. The skulls, flowers, and chains that decorate my body glowed a faint blue color, as if cheering that they were finally free from my always concealed clothing.

I didn't want to wear it, every part of my mind was screaming to tear it off but I couldn't. My sister picked this out for me and this is her party, I'll do it for her if not for myself. Sliding my mask back on I headed out the room, looking down at Portia with a nervous smile as she stared at the art in wonder, "I never knew you had these!" She pouted, looking as If I had betrayed her somehow. I could only reached out and pat her head, trying to ignore the eyes that locked onto me, "Im not very fond of them, so I always hid them, Im sorry for not telling you sooner." She merely rolled her eyes and smiled at me before realization yet again broke on her face, "I need to go tell the rest you're here! Stay put!" My eyes widened as I tried to stop her, but she was already out of reach before I could, and the slithery presence was back at my feet.

"Friend!"

Fucking hell.

At that moment I felt the fight to run away slowly drain from me, I knew I couldn't avoid him forever, no matter how hard I tried. Even so, with what resistance was left in me I headed towards the garden with Faust resting peacefully on my shoulders, and stayed put by the fountain, letting my eyes flutter shut for a mere moment.

_____

My palms started to sweat as I looked down into those mesmerizing lavender eyes that watched me with an amused glint, "Asra I-" The words got caught in my throat for the millionth time now, and even I was getting impatient with myself. But can you blame me? Asra looked so majestic under the moonlight, with the stars that practically glowed in his eye's, I don't think I've ever thought it was possible to feel so relaxed and intimidated at the same time.

"[Y/n], are you okay?" He asked, his voice barley above a whisper as he slowly reached up, softly brushing his fingers against my cheek. A flutter in my chest caused the chains on my body to recoil slightly, and thankfully he didn't notice the change, "No, I just can't hold it in anymore Asra" My hand clenched tightly on my sleeves, nearly causing them to rip while Asra brushed a lock of hair of of my face. "Hold in what?" He smiled, but my eyes drifted to his chest, looking where the mark on his heart is hiding, causing me to reluctantly pull away from his touch.

It was a simple friendly gesture he's always done to calm me down, to bring me back from whatever clouded my thoughts. So when I pulled away he reached out again, slower this time, as if any rushed movement would send me away. "Asra stop" He looked a bit shocked when I grabbed his wrist, but my grip was gentle, cause I'm more afraid of hurting him than anyone else. However the negative thoughts practically swallowed my mind whole as I rejected his magic from flowing into me. The mark on his chest was the only thing I could look at, cause it reminds me everyday that he gave up some of his heart for his apprentice, to bring them back. Jealousy truly is a cruel thing.

"Nevermind, it was foolish of me to think I even had a chance" I whispered with a bitter chuckle, taking a step back I crossed my arms, turning my broken gaze towards the sky. "Forget it, just go back to your apprentice, they need you more than I do" I don't know why my words came out laced in such malice and sorrow, but they did, and that seemed to earn a glare back from him. "What's wrong with you? Ever since you found out about my deal its like all you want to do is run away from me and push me away, if you have something to say to me then go ahead and say it, but do not drag them into this."

The chain around my neck tightened, slowly crushing at my windpipe as I clenched my fists and smiled softly to myself. I knew I'd regret what I did next, I knew it would weigh on me forever, I knew it would cause me much more pain then it did right then, but I did it anyway. Ill have to thank Ilya if this works, putting on my best face I turned towards Asra and scoffed, tilting my head a bit, like I usually do when pissed off, even though this is just a lovely facade. "Don't even bother, its not like you'd care anyways, would you? All you care about is that apprentice of yours, you even gave up part of your heart for them" I let the words flow, nearly letting the tears pool in my eyes when I spat them out.

"Is that really what you think?" He hissed, knuckles turning white from how tightly he was grasping his sleeves, but I didn't let myself falter under his gaze. "Asra I don't have to think it when I know its true, we've known each other since we were kids, you can't fool me" I scoffed, glaring back into his lavender eyes, keeping that gaze was a lot harder then I thought it would be. Before he could speak up I made sure to cut him off, "You love 'em, that's the only reason you'd do it right? Because you love them? Let me guess, you couldn't live without them could you?" I rolled my eyes, looking off to my left, practically feeling his breath hitch for a moment, confirming what I needed to know.

Im sorry Asra.

You don't have to forgive me.

Because I highly doubt these chains will go anywhere, I can never be free. Even with you by my side, the one person that keeps me together, the one person that I'd risk everything for.

Im so sorry.

"Just leave already, its not like you want to be here anyways right? So just leave me alone, I don't want you here."

_____

I don't remember much after that, but I do know he left, and I was left alone to wallow in my own despair. The chains got tighter over the year, so tight that the only thing keeping me breathing is all the techniques I've learned, and the fact I learned how to hold my breath for a long while. A few tears slip past my [E/c] eyes, that Faust happily wipes away with her tail, rubbing her face against my cheek, "Friend!" She smiles, curling against me, it felt so good to have her around again. Even if this'll be the last time.

The chains tighten a slight fraction, forcing me to hold my breath. "[Y/n]?" My body tensed at how my name rolled off his lips, it felt like a distant dream, like this isn't actually happening, but one look at him and I know its real. My god has he always looked so gorgeous? Or am I going crazy? Probably both. Once [E/c] met Lavender I knew I was done, his hairs pushed back like last year though the mask kinda looks the same, with only a few added touches, and his costume definitely gets him to stand out above the rest, just a beautiful array of bright colors clashing against his mixed skin, it hugs his figure perfectly. He looks like a god amongst the light of the fountain.

"Its me" I sighed out, reluctantly turning my gaze back to my feet. I couldn't help the surprise when he moved in front of me, placing both hands on my cheeks, looking into my eyes with such relief that I could hardly believe it. His touch sent shivers down my spine, slowly I started to breathe again as the chains retract a bit, I had clearly forgotten how revealing my clothes are, cause once the chains pulled back Asra's eyes shifted to them.  "How long have you had these?" He asked, trailing his hands down to trace the marking with a soft touch, "Asra wait-" Yet the mark appears, the same one he has, just mine glowed a faint blue in the center of my chest.

His eyes widened seeing the mark, keeping his eyes on it as if it were to attack at any moment, "You've never had chains, its always been your skulls and flowers, is it because of this? Why didn't you tell me about this?" He looked hurt, the same hurt in his eyes that he had a year ago when we last talked.

"What was your deal?"

Oh how I wanted to tell him, but the chains tightened at the thought, yet I pushed through it, Im tired of lying, I'm tired of keeping everything in, Im tired of it all, "That I couldn't be open anymore, that I wouldn't be able to speak my mind freely like I once did." A small cough ripped out my throat as a blue glow tried to burn past the chains, failing miserably. "What? Why?" He looked stunned, I don't blame him, I've always been one to speak my mind and tell everyone how I'm feeling, to be honest to myself and them without a care about what others thought.

But..

"I was scared, there's something I've always wanted to say, but I never could because I've always been so afraid about what would happen after, what if it went wrong? What if I messed up? What if I said something wrong? What if you-" My mouth snapped shut as quickly as it could, now I certainly can't avoid this, cause those lavender eyes stare at me with such intensity I might just burn away. His hands slowly moved up to my neck, letting his magic aid in pulling the chain away from my neck, allowing me to breath freely. "What about me?" He asked softly, keeping his gaze fixed on mine as my hands unconsciously travel to his hips.

I guess it's now or never..

Building what up whatever courage I had left, I pulled Asra against my chest, using one hand to push his mask out the way, before claiming his lips with mine.

[everybodyscupoftea]

put your hand in mine

frat jj x reader

one year anniversary with pike jj and some reminiscing

oof this took me longer to get done than i’d like but here it is :)

warnings: cursing, borderline edited

For your one-year anniversary, you and JJ took some days off and drove from Nashville to Memphis for a hiking trip. It was his suggestion, but you were so tired of being constantly cooped up and inactive with school that you jumped on it. He took off the necessary days of work, and the two of you loaded up the car early one morning and hit the road.

The trip wasn’t long and consisted of the two of you singing along to whatever came up on shuffle. JJ told you he’d handle reservations, and while you did trust him to handle it, you were pleasantly surprised when he pulled up to some sort of housing office and actually got a key for a small cabin a little way up a mountain.

He saw your impressed face before you could hide it and laughed, “That much faith in me, huh?”

You shrugged, “I’m the planner, J.”

“Well, I’ve been paying attention.”

A fond feeling swept over you, and you couldn’t stop yourself from reaching out to grab the front of his shirt and pull him into a kiss. When you pulled away, he looked a little dazed, but pleased, and smirked at you before saying, “Just got here and you already can’t keep your hands off me.”

You rolled your eyes, “Don’t flatter yourself.”

“Too late.”

JJ grabbed the suitcases out of the trunk and you grabbed the two of yours’s booksacks before following him to the front porch. The interior of the cabin was small but bigger than your shared apartment, and you dropped the bags on the bed before wandering out the back door to see the view.

“J,” you called out and waited for him to pop his head out the door. When he did, you pointed excitedly, “Hot tub!”

He nodded, “One of the main reasons I picked this place, actually. Should be nice, especially when it starts to get cold tonight.”

You wandered back in to keep exploring the cabin before realizing the you were definitely going to have to make a grocery run. For the two of you, it was a true test of patience. JJ hated taking the time to plan and make up a list, more prone to just grabbing something that interested him when he saw it, while you liked having a set list that you rarely deviated from.

Fortunately, you’d had the foresight to make a list in the car on the way there, so all you had to do was find a grocery store. JJ groaned and complained a little about having to get back in the car when you just got out of it, but you promised to cook his favorite food and it shut him up quickly.

The store was crowded, clearly catered toward tourists staying temporarily in cabins. You sent JJ off to go pick out snacks for the two of you to carry and eat while hiking, and you started getting the ingredients for your agreed upon meals.

You were actually impressed when you met back up with JJ, his hands full of protein bars and trail mix and bananas instead of the normal snacks he tried to buy. When you pointed it out, he told you, very seriously, “We may not be experienced hikers, but we’re going to do our best to fake it.”

He paid for the groceries and the two of you headed back toward the cabin. By the time everything was unpacked, it was late afternoon and JJ was starting to complain about being hungry. You gently shoved him toward the living room, “If you go get a fire started, I’ll cook you up some alfredo, and we can eat on the couch.”

“Fuck yes, alfredo,” he cheered before walking off to do as you suggested.

Shaking your head in amusement at his antics, you started searching the cabinets for pots and skillets to use for dinner. The chicken was pretty much cooked and the noodles were boiling by the time JJ rejoined you, a few smears of soot on his cheekbone and neck.

You held your hand out to pull him closer and after licking your finger, started rubbing it over the soot, trying to clean it off. When JJ realized what you were doing, he jerked his face away from your heads with a, “Fucking gross, don’t put your spit on my face!”

The look you gave him was exasperated when you asked him, “Really? You’ve made out with me and you’re worried about a little spit on your cheekbone?”

He nodded emphatically, “That’s so different. Making out is hot, this is gross.”

You held your hands up, “Fine, go wash your face off then.”

With one last dramatic shudder, he disappeared in the bathroom, just off the kitchen and you rolled your eyes. JJ wasn’t gone long, and when he returned, he wrapped his arms around you from behind, swaying in place a few times while you poured the sauce in and combined everything.

“Get the garlic bread out of the oven, yeah?” you asked.

He sighed and pulled away from you to do as you asked and you suppressed a laugh at how dramatic he was acting.

“Oven mitts?” he asked, holding his arms out expectantly.

“Nope, bare hands only.”

JJ gave you a deadpan look before going through drawers until he found a pair. You finally turned the heat off under the food and grabbed some plates out of one of the cabinets.  When the food was dished out and the two of you were on the couch in front of the fire, JJ finally spoke again, “So, I know we technically didn’t get together that night, but tonight is the anniversary of you kissing me totally fucking wasted.”

You cringed a little at your past actions and nodded, “Yup, yeah, that’s true.”

“Thoughts?” he asked.

“I’m glad I did it, I guess. You weren’t going to do anything, you chicken shit.”

He snorted, “Yeah, okay, how do you know that?”

Which, that was the first time you’d heard that, so you leaned into his side, “Wait, what?”

JJ shrugged, not looking at you, “I don’t know, I was just getting to the breaking point, and I was going to ask you out eventually.”

You smiled, “So, I just beat you to it?”

“Pretty much.”

And just to mess with him a little, you shrugged, “You know, if I haven’t professed my love to you while drunk, we probably aren’t friends. I’m the sappiest drunk in the world.”

With a laugh, JJ nodded, “You’re right. But I’ve never seen you kiss anyone besides me.”

“I don’t kiss and tell.”

JJ took your plate and set them both on the floor before tackling you onto the couch, digging his fingers into your side. You squealed, giggling at his fingers’ assault on your side, JJ laughing along with you. He finally stopped and stayed on top of you, smiling softly, both of you catching your breath.

You reached up and ran one of your hands through his hair, stopping to rest on his cheek. JJ leaned into it a little before bending down further to kiss you. Surging up to meet him halfway, you kissed back happily, fire dying down in the background, and ran you fingers over his cheekbone repeatedly.

JJ pulled away and started kissing down your neck until he got to the collar of your t-shirt. Reaching down, he started pushing your shirt up, exposing your stomach, before you grabbed his hand, moving it away. He gave you a confused look and you told him, “I wanna go in the hot tub.”

Shutting his eyes with a sigh, he said, “If we go to bed now, we can do the hot tub tomorrow after hiking.”

“Why not both,” you suggested, half-jokingly.

“No,” JJ stubbornly replied, and got off you, walking toward the room, “come join me when you’re ready.”

You laughed and got off the couch, following him into the bedroom.

-

JJ was still asleep when you woke up the next morning. You got out of bed and put on one of the hoodies he brought before quietly making your way to the kitchen to start making the coffee. It was nice, finally having time away together, for the first time since your trip over the summer.

It wasn’t long before he joined you, roused by the sounds of you moving around and the smell of the coffee. He wrapped his arms around you, burying his face into your neck, and you poured him a mug, mixing in a little sugar. JJ hummed and swayed the two of you back and forth, still trying to wake up.

“Excited for hiking today, bub?” you asked.

He shrugged, “Yay, exercise.”

You laughed and pushed away gently, “Drink your coffee and get dressed, we’ve still got to pick a trail.”

With a small whine, he did as you said, and you went to get dressed. It was early, but you figured the earlier the two of you got back for the afternoon, the less excuse he’d have to get out of joining you in the hot tub.

JJ didn’t really care what trail the two of you did, just told you that you couldn’t “send me into a cardiac arrest before I turn 24” so, naturally, you picked the hardest trail near your cabin. He packed the snacks and filled up both of your water bottles, and then the two of you were off, driving to the trailhead.

It was quiet the first half hour or so, both of you focused on keeping your footing and not wiping out. Eventually, JJ woke all the way up and started chattering. He decided he wanted to be in control of the map, which you took a little bit of problem with, but you sucked it up and decided to let him have his moment. As an anniversary gift. (You were keeping track secretly just to make sure)

The two of you hiked for a few hours, waiting until you reached an overlook to finally take a break. JJ leaned against a tree and you sat next to him, splitting a protein bar in half for y’all to share. He took half and you asked, “You remember how we met?”

JJ’s chewing stopped as he thought back before shaking his head, “Not really. It feels like I’ve known you forever, like there’s not a time you weren’t so entrenched in my life that I think about you all the time and that I want to be with you when we’re apart.”

Your jaw dropped at his words, not really sure how to respond appropriately. With a weak laugh, you went with, “I helped you pass English 115. You cheated on all my quizzes because you were so sleep deprived from rushing.”

Raising his eyebrows, JJ chuckled, “Sounds about right, looking after me even when you didn’t know me.”

“I wanted to know you.”

He grabbed your hand, stroking over your knuckles a few times with his thumb. Eventually, he responded, “I’m glad I was forced into taking that stupid 8 a.m.”

“Me too.”

The rest of your break was pretty quiet, a few mumbled things back and forth before JJ stood and held out a hand to help you up. He glanced over the map, “Looks like we can go down the other side and hike around the base to get back to the trailhead. It’s a little extra walking but we’ll be seeing something new rather than go back the way we came.”

“Yeah, let’s do that.”

The only real noises between the two of you was heavy breathing and eventually you had to complain, “Fucking hell, how much farther?”

JJ laughed and held his hand out to help you jump down from a small ledge, grabbing your hips when you landed and stumbled. He said, “Getting close to the bottom, pretty girl, then we have a mile of flat to get back to the car.”

You put a hand on his shoulder, “You know I always said I’d wait to hike with a guy until we were married so it would be harder for him to leave me when I complained about my feet hurting.”

“Do your feet hurt?”

“They kill.”

He squeezed your hand and you let it drop from his shoulder so the two of you could keep walking.

-

JJ half dragged you into the cabin, your arm thrown over his shoulder while you chanted, “Hot tub, hot tub, hot tub.”

He had a faux annoyed look on his face and he dropped you on the couch, “Gee, what do you want to do now?”

You hopped up, full of energy again, “Come on, J, please.”

Eyebrows raised, he stared at you, “Where was this energy before? Suddenly you’re fine to walk?”

“Yes. I will always be able to walk to a hot tub.”

“Jesus, okay, hot tub time.”

You changed and grabbed towels while JJ pulled the cover off. Getting in felt great, your muscles going lax immediately. JJ joined just as you were about to melt into a corner and pulled you over to sit between his legs, leaning back against his chest.

“Happy anniversary, baby.”

Letting your eyes close, you smiled and said, “Happy anniversary. A whole year.”

“My longest relationship.”

“Have you had any others?”

He hummed, chest vibrating, “Not like this.”

You were intrigued, “Like what?”

He traced a finger across your shoulders and shrugged, “Like serious. Like someone I’m in love with.”

“You love me huh?” you asked, linking your hands with his under water, “Guess that’s good because I love you too.”

JJ kissed your shoulder, lips lingering quirked up in a smile, “I’d sure hope so at this point.”

“Do you remember, last year, on the hammock?”

“Mhmm,” he mumbled, lips trailing across your shoulders.

“You told me that you wouldn’t be like the other guys who told me they wanted to be with me.”

“Oh yeah? And how did I do?”

You turned, kissing him softly, “Pretty damn good.”

JJ squeezed your hips, “Good. I intend to stick to that.”

“I hope so,” you told him with a laugh, “I like having you around.”

[emawinslow]

we all knew this was coming and I’m a sentimental bitch. I just wanted to write all my mutuals some little messages about how much I love you. you guys have changed my life and I am so grateful for each and every one of you!!!💕💞💓💗💖💘 anygays have fun searching for yourself in this mess and I’m sorry for any typos, I’m illiterate (and if i forgot you it’s because i lost my brain in 1912)

@cr1spyy fernanda, my first ever mutual. who would have thought that your 5th wave posts would have brought one of the most amazing people in my life to me. your posts always make me laugh and your dedication to the good morning asks is admirable (fr I could never have that much consistency) you’re so kind to everybody and you’re absolutely beautiful and incredible and I fucking love you so much. I honestly don’t even want to think about what my life would be like if I had never met you, MWAH💕🤍

@sundaymorninghangover I remember you being my first ever note!! you liked this post I made that was a reblog of a “uquiz” that was actually a rickroll lmao. you didn’t even follow me back then but whatever. Then I remember waking up one day to see that you had tagged me in a bingo ask game and I was like “ummm tf is an ask game” but I do still have a bingo card for it that I never used ekenksjs. anygays, you have good opinions on everything and you’re absolutely fucking hilarious. If you told me back in may that I would be friends with you I wouldn’t believe it bc you intimidated me but regardless I’m glad to be an arson gang member with you. your memes are god tier and so is your music taste. I love you whore!!!!!🖤💜

@sound-and-colors ma’am you’re so nice and for what??? the aesthetic stuff that you reblog is *chef’s kiss* and nobody else is out there doing it like you. we’ve never talked but I just know that you are absolutely incredible mwah❤️💛

@embeddedinmybrain tasfia you are the nicest person on his hellsite and you know it (I hope). It was so much fun being your secret admirer anon while it lasted, like fr I loved it. Your art is beautiful just like your heart and i honestly don’t know what I did to deserve such a kind soul like you in my life. You’re always there to hype me up and ily (also just cut your own hair already I believe in you)🤍💙

@gumptin you hooked me with your suus icon and reeled me in by being the coolest and funniest person ever. your posts are consistently hilarious, accurate, or relatable and I admire that. I mean it when I say you’re one of the coolest people on here. idk what I did to have you think I’m cool but I’m honored nonetheless. also you have really awesome style and hair jdnjdjdjd mwah💚💛

@nori-in-pink first and foremost, your blog always has a very nice aesthetic and I feel like I need to acknowledge that. anyway, you are so kind and supportive and you don’t take any bullshit and that is absolutely amazing. you are absolutely iconic and always reblog the best stuff so I know I can count on your blog to be fantastic. you used to scare me (idk why don’t ask) but now I know that you’re just a big teddy bear ily💗💜

@matteohnora my slurpee queen and my mememate!! you always send me the funniest shit and it doesn’t go unappreciated. You’re always there for me with a silly meme or emotional support and I don’t think I’ve ever told you how grateful I am for that. whenever you stalk my blog it makes my heart go whooosh and I feel so special. Ily and I am so glad to have met you💜❤️

@lieverobbe ah yes, the girl with the impeccable music taste. that’s what I know you as, oh well. you are more talented and kind than you could ever believe and your edits are amazing!!! whenever I see you on my dash I get all happy bc I’m like “em’s here!!!” I love all your lil posts and I am so glad that you are my mutual ilyyyyy💙🤍

@ironymane you’ve watched limitless which automatically makes you amazing. you’re an absolutely incredible and amazing person and even tho you aren’t on here as much anymore, I still love youre lil posts. And one time you kept me entertained on a 6hr car ride so you deserve some kind of award for that. ly🧡💛

@kingarthurpendragons okay the obvious thing to talk about here is your incredible talent when it comes to gif making. Like how in the hell- but you are also so kind and loving and it doesn’t go unnoticed. You don’t have to send nice asks but you do and ily for it mwah!!❤️💗

@engelkeijsers the skam nl stan that we all deserve to have in our lives. you are so fucking hilarious and relatable and all around amazing and for what? your posts always put a smile on my face and it is so much fun to clown with you. ilyyyy💚💛

@happiness-isin-you let’s ignore the fact that it took me forever to realize that this was your main lmao. your art is some of the most beautiful shit I’ve ever seen. like your style is so cool????  I could literally go on about this for hours don’t test me. the cute animal pictures are the absolute best and you’re always there for emotional support. Ilyyyyyyy💛❤️

@isakyaqi fiz you are so kind and talented and cool and I really do mean all that. You reblog always the best of content so I know I can trust it. you always put nice tags in the things you reblog things and it’s fun to read what you write because it’s almost always you hyping up the creator or the thing itself. you are awesome jdjdjdndjjd mwah🖤🤎

@cash-queens sam oh sam. Idek where to start with how much ily. You’re my famous mutual which is very iconic of you and you put up with my cat pictures and my silly antics and my riverdale posts. You’re so kind to me and everybody and whenever I make a post when I’m having a mental breakdown you’re always there to make sure that I’m doing okay. That def doesn’t go unappreciated. You’re legitimately one of the kindest and most amazing people I’ve ever known and I love you so much, more than you could ever know💛🤍

@welcometo-saturn çağrı you’re so cool. end of statement. that’s all I have to say about it. your gifs are so beautiful and you don’t take shit from anybody. you’re so down to earth that it makes it seem like you’re somebody who I’ve just always known (even tho we’ve never talked sjdjdjdjdj) so yeah anyway, you’re are a really awesome person with really good opinions and I am so glad that we are mutuals🧡❤️

@amifeelingokay it’s difficult not to start with your url bc it’s amazing and I love it. your skam posts are always so nice and cute and positive (just like you!!) and I love them. the content you reblog is always aesthetic or a nice text post and I just love your blog okay. ily💜🖤

@isthatelpome you’re so nice that I’m willing to overlook your opinion on salt and vinegar chips (they’re not good I’ll fight you on that) your dani icon is beautiful just as you are, mwahhhh🧡❤️

@earthling-isa babe you are so cute with your lil edits and your clowning. the near constant black and white aesthetic is very iconic and i love it. you’re a suus stan so I have no choice but to love you for it. i absolutely adore your gifs, especially the ones with the lil squares in the middle fygzbgut. you are absolutely beautiful and incredible and kind and I love you MWAHHHH🖤💙

@grey-mist-exist okay we’ve never talked but you seem like such a rad person. not cool but like rad (there are are subtle differences) your art is beautiful even tho idk the quotes (go off smarty pants) and overall you are just really rad, idk how else to say it mwah!!!🤍🖤<pretend it’s a grey heart

@fatoudixon hey look it’s one of the most talented people here!!! You’ve always been so kind and supportive of me and I really really do appreciate it. you have good opinions on everything and did I mention that you’re talented?? cause you are, very. Your reaction videos are amazing and not to mention iconic, just like your hair. anyway, ily and I am so glad that I have somebody as amazing as you as my mutual💙💛

@sander-klaas you are so kind and and you have so much passion. I can always trust you reblog only the best of wtfock and sobbe content which I am very grateful for. you literally just started making gifs and they are so beautiful (okay it was like months ago but whatever dkdjdjjdjdj) anyway, thank you so much for being my mutual mwah❤️💛

@jusdekiwi okay we’ve never talked but you genuinely seem like such a sweet person??? I love the stuff you reblog, it’s always the best gif sets. idk I can just tell you have good taste. I hope to get to know you better in the future, but for now I am very grateful to have you💚💙

@kritiquer my twin!!! you and I have a lot in common so ofc I love you. I’m joking obviously.... anygays you are always so supportive of everybody and you are so sweet. I love all of your personal posts, it always makes me really happy to see what you’re up to and how you’re feeling. I also like the aesthetic stuff you reblog, I have bad taste in all that, clearly you don’t. I am so glad that we started talking and I hope that we continue! ily kit!!!!💜🤍

@bleachblondebitches you aren’t on here that much, but whenever you are I get so happy! Your gifs are beautiful and I think about your sobbe and booksmart parallels gifset every day. you have amazing taste in movies and I love you!💜💙

@lesbeanfatou clara!!! bitch!!!! You already know how much I love you but I guess I’ll reiterate. I honestly don’t know what I did before I knew you. I always remember looking at the no idea blog with the Nora icons like “who is this?” Little did I know back then that you would be one of my closest friends. your support of me means the world and I am so grateful for you. I’m so glad that I have somebody in my life like you to talk to and be friends with. you are one of the funniest people in and I just love you so much I could burst mwah❤️🧡

@gucciboner okay hiii ypu are literally so fucking kind and funny, i admire your sense of humor sm. your art is so beautiful and you are so goddamn talented, it never ceases to amaze me. I also love all the little funny posts you make and reblog!! ily💙💗

@helmtaryn even though you put supernatural on my dash, I am willing to forgive you bc I love you so much. your gifs are so beautiful like ma’am didn’t you just start?? icon shit. your hate for photoshop is iconic and you are awesome. you’re always sending me asks and responding to my posts and you’re so nice and it makes my heart go whooosh. anygays you’re cool and ily💙🧡

@starmansander nina when I tell you that you give off the best vibes- okay sorry I had to start with that. I love how you are so nice and supportive of me, it really means a lot. I really like the stuff you reblog like,,, cool art? pretty women? those hopeful little posts? iconic. also youre a noor stan which is a sign of good taste. love you🤎❤️

@ijzermanora daniiiiiii madam you are so epic and iconic and I really could go on about that forever. you are so kind and you’re following all my joke sideblogs (even the ch*cken l*ttle hate blog??? why???) which is very brave of you. I love reading all of your lil wholesome posts and hearing about school and how much you hate chemistry (even tho you like sushi???) anygays we were already sending memes 10 hours into our mutualship so I think we were soulmates from the very beginning. I love you so much and I have no idea what I did before i knew you💜💗

@alwaysin-myhead okay, you give off cool person vibes and I had to acknowledge that. your art is so beautiful and you are so incredibly talented!!! I hope to get to know you in the future🧡💛

@alexiaugustin here she is!!! the queen of good opinions!!! you are such a smart cookie and you use that power to make long paragraph posts that I can actually read without falling asleep. which is impressive honestly. never has a person been so kind and funny and genius in such a well rounded way (that makes no sense) I’m so happy that I have you in my life ilyyy💚💗

@ijntba hihi you’re such a sweet person and I literally love your skam blog sm. I am so honored that you’re using one of my icons you have no idea. even though I’m confused when you post about anime, I still appreciate your passion lmao. mwah💛🧡

@hidden-joy liz!! you are such a kind soul and I absolutely love looking at the things you reblog and reading all the nice things that you put in the tags, it’s always so sweet and supportive!!! we’re relatively new mutuals, but I do hope to get to know you better in the future!!!💚💛

okay sorry to group y’all together but @fudgetunblr and @alexiswoke I like just became mutuals with y’all but I do love you and I’m glad you’re here and I hope 2021 treats you well and that i get to know you better!!❤️❤️

aaand one last final message for max and sarah, i know yall wont see this but ily🧡 💜

okay yeah I know I already said this but I really do love each and every one of you so much and I am so lucky to have so many amazing people in my life💕💕💓💕💖💖💕💘💕💗💞💓💕💖💖💘💕💓

[somnolent-snufkin]

Intervention Room

After seeing this comment on this post, I realized I should probably make a post explaining what the intervention room is and why I keep talking about it.

This post is going to be very long and very painful. Get ready to read some horrifying shit.

When I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome, Bipolar, and ADHD at age 5, my parents didn't know what to do. They knew I would struggle in school. They did everything they could to prepare me for elementary school. They sent me to a charter school in Arizona. But my violent behavior and overwhelming anger caused them to kick me out right after Kindergarten. This was 2009, so people still thought vaccines caused autism. People didn't know anything about children with autism.

In 2010, I was placed in a public school in another district. There was no special needs classroom or helpers. So I quickly failed in that environment. (But I did meet one of my most beloved friends there. I love you no homo, Emily!) That school kicked me out right as my family was getting ready to move houses (during a financial crisis of all things). My parents desperately looked for a school that would take me. There were schools specifically designed for children with autism in Arizona, but they wouldn't except me because of my violent behavior.

Eventually, we were told about a school that had a program called [Redacted]. It was designed for children with autism. They prided themselves on their wonderful treatment towards kids with neurodivergent disorders. They advertised their amazing system of teachers, rewards, punishments, treatments, etc. My parents needed to get me in a school fast. So, they chose [Redacted].

[Redacted] Elementary School was a generally good school. The students were diverse. The teachers were nice. The atmosphere felt relatively good.

Until you walked into the special needs room.

Special Needs Room had multiple teachers working in the two classrooms. They had one for grades Kinder - 2nd and another classroom for grades 3rd - 5th. Their system of multiple teachers teaching both one-on-one and one teacher teaching the whole class a lesson was really good. Especially for a public school at the time. But their punishment system was something directly out of a fucking dystopian novel.

If you showed disobedience to a teacher, you would be sent to a desk facing away from everyone else with a paper. You had to write an apology to the teacher, what you did wrong, and what you'll do next time. If you disobeyed the teacher's command to send you to time out even once. You were sent to the intervention room. If you got violent, you were dragged by the arms into the intervention room. Disagreed with something? Intervention room. Didn't like the way another student was treating you? Intervention room. God, they loved dragging children by the arms into the intervention room.

The amount of times we would hear screaming, crying, banging on the walls, and cries for help. It was unbearable. Especially the banging. Oh god, the banging. It's forever burned into my memory. All of this is.

The intervention room was a blank room with padded walls and one lockable room. The lockable room was the size of a closet. When they brought you in there, they would strip you of everything. All shoes, glasses, jewelry, hairbands, headbands, hairclips, everything. You were tossed into one of the taped off sections of the room with the padding on the walls. If you were to leave that taped area for too long, they would throw you into the lockable closet sized room. If you were to get violent, they would put you into a hold. These holds would cause bruises every time. Children would come home with bruises on their arms every fucking day. The two main holds were holding your hands behind your back and stretching your arms around your torso like a straight jacket. Once I was pressed to the floor with my hands behind my back and a knee on my shoulder. But it lasted about a minute before they realized how fucking illegal that was.

Because of my violent behavior and my cynical views, I would get thrown in the intervention room for hours everyday. I spent a total of over 300 hours in the intervention room over the course of 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th, and 5th grade. That's why I have so many memories of it. I remember more about the intervention room than I do anything else from elementary school.

I remember what I did to pass the time. To keep myself sane during those long hours. I would sing myself songs. I would tell myself stories. I would try and remember the entire script of episodes of My Little Pony. If I felt like giving up and letting their abuse crack me, I reminded myself that Connor Parsons was waiting for me at Kid Zone. I would tell myself that if I could push through their abuse for just a few more hours, I could see him again. I could spend time with him and play Minecraft with him. I could watch him from afar and study his neurotypical behavior. I could be around him and his friends and feel normal. I could feel normal and pause my self-loathing for a while.

I remember laying on the floor of the locked space. I remember being cold and weak. They didn't feed you while you were in there. If you missed out on lunch because of your "bad behavior", you wouldn't get to eat. I was already malnourished enough after suffering through dad's days without a job. But they malnourished me further. They never fed me anything. I have a vivid memory of me singing Lullaby for a Princess while locked in the closed space. I sat there and sang the lyrics. Once I got to the lyrics:

"Luna you're loved so much more than you know...

May troubles be far from your mind...

And forgive me for being so blind..."

I looked at my wrists and I started crying. They were so thin. I had been in the intervention room for a few hours around lunchtime everyday for that entire week. I hadn't eaten the school lunch for five days. All I had was the dinner at home. I felt weak and cold. I laid there on my side, curled up in a ball. Still crying.

This is a picture of me around that time. It might not look like it here but I was EXTREMELY malnourished. I barely drank any water and I couldn't eat most foods. The fact that they took away lunch as a punishment just further ruined my condition.

Also, I dealt with encompresis as a child. Meaning I held in my waste. Since I spent hours in the intervention room at a time and I wasn't allowed to use the restroom, they also caused further damage to my intestines by basically encouraging me to hold in my waste. That's right. They used the restroom as a reward for following their rules.

I'll keep adding to this post as I remember things. Which should be quite often since the PTSD is really getting to me lately.

Anything I post about the intervention room will be tagged "The Intervention Room".

Please do not feel afraid to ask me questions. I will answer them to the best of my ability.

Share this post. Share my story. Please help me make my voice heard.

Edit: Names edited out for legal reasons.

[diddlesanddoodles]

DEAD WALLS RISE - FARRIS

Special thanks to the forever amazing @thundering-susurrus​ for editing. 

“You should smile more.”

Farris turned his head to eye the thin figure sitting under the window. Without use of his eyes, Kent could no longer see the sunlight spilling down onto him, but the human still enjoyed the warmth of the sun’s rays nevertheless.

“What are ye on about?” Farris asked. “I smile plenty.”

Kent didn’t turn to face his Vhasshalan guardian. “I can hear it in your voice when you frown.”

“The fuck ye can.”

“See?” said the man with a knowing grin. “You did it just now.”

Farris stepped away from the pan of toasting spices to glare at his ward. “Aye, because I have a smarmy lil’ wanker tellin’ me I frown too much.”

“I believe what I said was – ”

“BAH! I know what ye said. When I have a reason to smile more, I will.”

“Seems like you have good reasons to smile now,” Kent said, turning his face to Farris at last. There was no real point in facing the giant when they spoke other than an old inclination from when he still had use of his eyes. “No one’s caught fire in a while. That should be a good enough reason to me.”

Though he clearly saw that Kent was trying to goad him into a lighter mood, Farris did not possess enough spirit at that moment to feel anything other than the same weighted guilt that always followed him day in and day out. “Gonna take a lot more than that, lad.”

Kent’s mild smile faded away. “Isn’t just… being alive enough?”

“Not everyone’s as chipper about that as ye.”

A silence fell between them. To Farris, it felt heavy and dreadful, and he had half a mind to demand the human to simply drop the topic and allow him to go on with his day. Work was numbing and was the only thing he had found that came close to alleviating the pain. The pain brought on from the memories and the knowledge of what he had done. He had his reasons, of course. He had made his choice: the lives of his boys over the scores of captured humans. He was responsible for the workers under him and the humans had been enemy combatants. But that justification only held water for so long. 

“You’ll forgive yourself one day, Farris.”

Kent’s words felt like ice in his chest. He brushed a hand across his nose as he bent to grab the pan from the fire. Tipping the now-toasted spices into a bowl, he set it aside before grabbing the next batch and tossing the raw spices into the still hot pan. Giving it a firm shake, his eyes drifted to the flames and he watched them dance for several long moments. He sat the pan down. 

“No,” he finally replied in a soft voice. “Ain’t no forgivin’ what I’ve done.”

“You’re too good a man to let his legacy ruin you.”

“Good men don’t murder in…” He stopped himself and sighed. “Ye wouldn’t understand, Kent. And I don’t expect ye to.”

“I think I do a little. Was on the other end of that mess, don’t you forget.”

“How could I?” Farris asked as he glanced over his shoulder. “Ye remind me all the time. Even though I was there.”

“And your bedside manner is as terrible as ever.”

He had to laugh at that. Walking around the table, he went to the counter where Kent was sitting and poked the man’s side. “Was there a point to this or do ye just like hearing yerself blabber on and on?”

“Hm… maybe a little of both?” Kent replied grinning. “No, I did have a point.”

“Then make it so I can get on with my work.”

“You’re a good man, Farris,” Kent said seriously. He reached out and patted Farris’s hand. “Even if you don’t think so. And there aren’t a whole lot of those left in the world. I do hope you find a reason some day to forgive yourself. Even just a little. And maybe you’ll start smiling again.”

Farris eyed him, suppressing the urge to be angry or brush away the man’s touch. Kent always confounded him. He had every right and opportunity to be a bitter wreck of a man after everything he had been through and yet, despite it all, Kent was endlessly cheery and kind. Sometimes frustratingly so. For several moments, Farris stared at the small scarred hand resting on his own. He grunted and pulled his hand away. “What’s got ye all sentimental this mornin’?”

“Hm? Oh, I dunno. Been thinkin’ about my place in the universe. Meaning of life. The usual,” Kent paused as a devious smirk crossed his face. “And of course see how long I can distract you until you catch on that your spices are burning.”

“Wha…? Ah! Ye lil’ fucker!”

Kent’s laughter filled his ears as he rushed back to the hearth to try and salvage his work. In the following years, Farris would regret not appreciating that sound more. It would be the last time he would hear Kent laugh.

The next night, he came down with a hellish fever.

And by morning, Kent was dead.

………………………………………………………………………..

The wedding feast preparations had been a symphony of chaos: carefully planned, but executed more with stubborn will than any finesse or strategy. He had assumed the weeks of prep they had done would carry them further than they ultimately had, and by the second to last course on the last day they were scrambling to keep up. Luckily for Farris, most of the guests were happy enough to indulge in the free flowing wine and liquor between the courses. They would be too inebriated to be able to find their own feet, let alone be able to tell that the next course was late.

And then, of course, that was when Yale brought him the thief.

A human child. She was a small and pitiful creature. Dirty, skinny, and terrified, but a thief nonetheless. He was far too busy to spare her any consideration of leniency. It was her poor luck that she chose to steal from him on the single busiest day in more than a decade. She would just have to wait, he decided. Secured in one of the wooden cages left over from the delivered livestock, he placed her on the counter inside the pantry, gave her a firm warning to be quiet, and left her there. She didn’t scream at him or try to escape. In fact, the little thief barely even made a sound other than muffled weeping. If it had been any other day, he may have felt pity for her. Instead, he was annoyed to have something else dumped onto his already overloaded plate.

Several hours later, when he had a moment to even consider her again, he found that she had wedged herself in the corner and fallen asleep. He opened the cage and slipped a ramekin of water inside before closing it back up again. The human child did not stir.

Even balled up as she was, he could tell she was very young. Too young to be wandering around on her own. A suspicion began to form in his mind that she was not just some young hooligan from the Hill Tribes making trouble. He’d had plenty of those come through over the years and after threatening to toss them into a pie, each of the little troublemakers would be quick with their excuses and defenses. So, after a good scare and a lecture, they’d be sent back to Gregis for another lecture and whatever punishment the Hill Tribe leader saw fit. The war might be over, but danger still remained, even within the castle.

However, Farris could not recall ever having come across a thief so young. Her clothes were made of a rough homespun hemp and, best he could tell, seemed too small for her. She wasn’t even wearing shoes. Autumn had been mild but still chilly enough to warrant shoes. Where in the Seven Hells did this girl come from? And where were her parents?

He decided to leave the questions for later and went to help with the last big push to get the dessert course out the door and cleanup underway. There was a large tankard of dark ale waiting for him at the end of the day and he did not intend to be late. He felt as though he had earned a drink.

…………………

“So what’re ye gonna do with the Dumplin’?”

Farris had sat down to supper that night, more aware of his age than he ever had been. The arthritis in his left wrist was acting up, his joints creaked, and his back hurt. But still, he felt a deep sense of accomplishment for the work they had done. He opened his eyes, glancing towards the source of the question, and shrugged. “Notified Donal. He’ll inform the King tomorrow and then it’ll be his discretion as to what’s to be done with her.”

That seemed to surprise Saen and the rest of his staff. Yale sat up a little straighter. “Why’d ye do that? Ain’t ye just gonna send her back to Gregis? Like the others?”

Farris chuckled. “That lil’ mite ain’t from the Hill Tribes, lad. She’s feral.”

“How can ye tell? She say somethin’?” Yale asked.

“Nah. Just a hunch,” He took a long swig of ale and, as he sat it back down, sent a vague gesture towards the pantry door. “Fer one thing, Gregis wouldn’t let a child run around in that state.”

“She was pretty mangy lookin’,” Yale conceded with a chortle. “Looked like the thin’ needed a good scrubbin’.”

“Thinkin’ a keepin’ her are ye?” Saen asked, elbowing Yale in the ribs.

Yale grinned. “Crossed my mind.”

“Well,” Farris said. “first she’s gotta face the King’s justice.”

“Still. If she ain’t from Gregis’s lot,” Yale said, “where the hell she come from?”

“Who knows,” he replied. “Where do any of ‘em come from anymore?”

Beside him, Bart laughed. “Half the time it seems like they just pop out of the ground like cabbages.”

Grinning, Farris took another long pull from his ale before getting to his feet and reaching for one of the communal bread loaves. He tore off a small but still sizable piece and turned from the table.

“Well, suppose I should go feed her somethin’,” Farris said. “That one’s the skinniest dumplin’ I’ve ever seen.”

Light laughter followed him as he opened the door to the spice pantry. The hearth light fell in an illuminating column into the room and onto the cage where he could see a swathe of red. Farris froze.

The girl was awake and on her belly, clutching the rim of the water cup he had left her. Her skin was red with a distinctive rash and she was pulling in short gasping breaths all the while, laying in a small pool of her own sick.

Farris felt his stomach drop. The red reap.

He recalled the night Kent fell with the fever and how the rash soon followed. His breathing had become raspy and labored and it was not very long at all before he breathed his last breath. But Kent had been an adult, a grown man. The Dumplin’ was just a small child.

“Seven fuckin’ Hells,” he cursed. It was Kent all over again and, though he would never admit it aloud or even to himself, Farris was scared. He turned to call back over his shoulder. “Yale, get me warm water, not hot, and a few towels.”

His assistant looked up at him from his place at the table with round cheeks, unable to answer him with his mouth so full. Beside him Saen was grinning at him cheekily. “Oh aye? Be needin’ some relaxation after all that exhaustin’ spice grindin’, eh, Farris?”

He glared at the cook. “Shut yer gob Saen before I bash it in. It ain’t fer me,” he said and turned his gaze back to the sick little girl. “The human’s got the red reap.”

All of the merriment and cheer died in an instant as all eyes of his staff turned to him. Yale especially looked upset as he mechanically chewed and swallowed. “She didn’t look ill earlier.”

“They call it the reap fer a reason, boy. There’s no warnin’. It just comes. Now get off yer arse and get me what I asked fer.”

Yale was on his feet in an instant, rushing to the shelf to grab a bowl. “...right away, boss.”

He stood beside her cage, feeling the weight of his shame and harshly cursing himself for his cruelty. It was very probable that these would be her last moments and he had her put into a cage. As a joke. But no one was laughing. He opened the cage and removed the cup of water. There was sick all over it and down the side, but he did not pay it any mind. When he reached back inside for the girl, she shied away with a pained mewl. She was shaking and weeping.

He had done this to her.

“Hush now,” he murmured softly to her, resting the tips of his fingers lightly across her back. She tried to squirm away from him. “I know it hurts, lil’un. I know yer scared. Just keep breathin’...”

Yale was there with the water and towels. “Where do you want this, Farris?”

“Upstairs,” he said, considering the girl and how best to pick her up without doing her more harm. “And I’ll need the salve from the drawer there. And a Cayne leaf. Small one.”

In the end, he simply scooped her into his cupped hands. She was so small and light, but shockingly warm. The fever had well set in and he knew she may not have much longer.

Yale followed him up to his private quarters and once inside, Farris directed him to set the bowl of water on the table. His first attempts to remove her vomit-covered clothes resulted in her struggling against him and he snarled at her in frustration. “Stop that, girl. Yer covered in sick.”

He decided it best to get it all over with as quick as possible and simply yanked them off her. She showed signs of malnutrition and was so thin that he knew she wouldn’t have the strength to fight off the fever. The realization seemed to hit Yale at the same time. Once she was clean, he wrapped her in one of the towels and tucked her into the crook of his arm. He applied the salve to her eyelids, where it would help cool the raging heat of the rash. Then he slipped the Cayne leaf into her mouth, which she immediately spat out.

He didn’t blame her. Cayne leaves were rancid and vile tasting things. But it was also one of the best pain remedies known.

“Ye can go Yale,” he said. “I’ve got ‘er.”

His assistant looked at him with wide and fearful eyes. “Ye sure?”

Farris nodded. “If she makes it through the fever, she’ll live,” he said and sighed deeply. “We’ll know by morning.”

He reached out and grabbed Yale by the shoulder with his free hand. “Regardless, I need you awake and alert tomorrow. There’s too much that still needs to be done. If she lives, she’ll be seeing the King. If not, well, the reap will have made the judgment fer ‘im.”

“All right,” he said with a lingering concern in his eyes. Yale touched a finger to the girl’s head, petting her softly. “Good luck, lil’un.”

After Yale had left, Farris went to his bed and sat down. He was not sure how long he sat there, watching the human sleep. The red rash had spread along her neck and face, but she did not stir from her sleep. Her breathing remained raged and labored.

In the quiet of the night, when he knew no one was around to hear him, Farris spoke to the girl.

“Yer just a lil’ thing,” he said quietly as he ran a finger across the top of her head. “Probably all alone in the world, eh? Either that or yer folks are right shit. Don’t look like the world’s been very kind to ye, lass. Even now, it’s still tryin’ its best t’beat ye down. But yer a strong one, ain’t ye? Not gonna let a fever take ye. Nah. Too green fer it all to end so soon. Yer gonna be alright there, Dumplin’. I’ll make sure of it. One way or another. Yer gonna be just fine. Yer gonna wake up…”

His hands were shaking.

“Please. Please, wake up.”

…………………..

He woke at the same time he had for the last twenty-some-odd years. It was still plenty dark, but the lamp on the wall was still lit, a minuscule amount of oil still feeding the small flame. He knew it would last until the first rays of the sun reached the castle roof and then would need to be refilled. At first, his mind automatically went to sorting out the day’s tasks, but everything stopped with a sickening jolt when he remembered the child. His arm remained curled around the bundle and he wondered, if he were to look down, would there be another face to add to the collection of the dead within his mind and nightmares? With a fortifying breath, his heart pounding, Farris dipped his head down to look at the little girl. The harsh red rash that had covered her face was gone. She had not gone stiff, and he realized with a start that she was still warm. 

She was still breathing.

She was alive.

“...ye… yer alive,” he breathed in shock, resting his free hand on the bundle. “Seven fuckin’ Hells… ye… I can’t...”

For a long moment, he sat there and watched her sleep, all the while riding the waves of varying emotions. In the end, he thought of Kent. Farris easily recalled what a pitiful and broken creature he had been when he had first laid eyes upon him. He remembered how he had made a place in his kitchen, his home, for him. He could do the same for the girl.

“...I could do that fer ye,” he said to no one in particular as he rose from the bed, careful not to wake his charge. With a warm smile on his face, he rocked her gently. “My lil’ Dumplin’.”

…………………..

It took Rheil less than an hour to return to the kitchens after delivering the girl to the King. Clutched in his gloved hand, he held Farris’s note. He stepped down into the kitchen and everyone eyed him eagerly as they slowed in their work to watch and listen. 

“So?” Farris asked Rheil as he wiped his hands on a tea towel and leaned against the counter. “She give his Majesty her story then?”

“Aye,” replied the captain as he crossed the room and held out the note to Farris. He took it, but did not open it. Rheil crossed his arms and leaned up against the long table and regarded the kitchen master with neutral expression. “Orphaned.”

He nodded. “Figured that much.”

“And ye were right,” Rheil replied. “She ain’t one of Gregis’s. She ain’t even a refugee.”

Farris squinted in bemusement. “No?”

“No. She’s from the Southlands. The port,” Rheil replied. “Guess there was some big ol’ fire than killed her last living relative. She was trying to steal some food from the caravan when it was being loaded and she got stuck.”

“That’s a three day trek nonstop,” Saen butted in, eye wide in horror. “Ye mean she was stuck in that basket for three days?”

Rheil nodded. “She was. Probably too scared to ask for help. Who knows what the Beastmen would ‘a done if they caught her and once she passed the Gate… well. In fer a penny.”

Farris huffed. “No wonder half my persimmon order was gone. She probably ate three golds worth all on her own.”

Rheil made a face. “Seems awfully steep just for some fruit.”

Farris waved the comment away. “That ain’t nothin’. Them red mud boars were twelve gold a piece and one arrived dead. Weddings on the whole are expensive affairs. A royal wedding is extravagant and extravagantly expensive. But I ain’t one to tell the King how to spend his money. That’s Thame’s job.”

“Also, the lass thought Nethrin was still King,” Rheil added and Farris frowned.

“She what?”

The captain nodded, a smirk creeping along the edges of his mouth. “Aye. Thought she was gonna faint on me fer a second. Told her he was long dead, but I ain’t sure how much she believed me.”

Farris ran a hand down his face. “Where she now?”

“Lolly’s got her.”

“Well, we won’t be seein’ her fer a few hours then,” Bart laughed as he came down the steps from the courtyard. “Them ladies will be fawning over the Dumplin’ till suppertime. Mark my words.”

“True enough and just as well,” Farris conceded. “That’ll give her time enough to acclimate a bit and we can get on with our work.”

Bart gave him a questioning look. Silently, Farris handed the note to him. Bart’s eyes scanned the words before glancing back to Farris with the same questioning eye. In reply, Farris just nodded and Bart shrugged noncommittally.

“Well alright then,” he said and went back to work.

Farris opened the note again to scan the words, feeling an rising sensation in his chest, and Kent’s words came abruptly to the forefront of his mind.

“You’re a good man, Farris. Even if you don’t think so. And there aren’t a whole lot of those left in the world. I do hope you find a reason some day to forgive yourself. Even just a little. And maybe you’ll start smiling again.”

The note read:

If it comes to pass that the girl does not have any place to go, I ask his Majesty to consider that I might be granted guardianship over her. - F

And written just under his note in a much finer hand and with higher quality ink than his own, was the short answer:

Your request is granted. Take care of her, Farris. - W

Farris smiled. 

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

BONUS ART:

[learnednothing]

wow! so i don’t know if i’ve ever done one of these — but there’s a first time for everything! it’s 4 am and i can’t sleep, and i just discovered i breeched another milestone! so i figured i’d whip up a quick one of these! if i forgot you — i’m so sorry sdgskdgk. the bottom two lists are alphabetized (mostly. rip my abc-ing in the middle of the night lsdgdsg). i may be editing this later in the day when my brain isn’t so foggy but HERE WE GO. ♡

❛  I LITERALLY WOULD NOT BE HERE WITHOUT YOU !   ❜

@suspectedalways​  /   gobs  .  .  .  i had to write this last, despite you being at the top of the list because tbh, i have no clue where to start. our friendship means the world to me. you came into my life when i needed you most, and you never stop validating and supporting me through whatever i need. murfoy is so special to me, but it has less to do with draco and more to do with just... your portrayal of him and the your whole existence. you are irreplaceable. you took me by storm and i just. ugh. i just love you so fucking much. our phone calls, our little lamps, our craaaazy similarities. you’re my soulmate, my best friend, my kismet. stay forever. i love you. 💖😚

@shesdaylight​ ( & @sororanimarum​ )   /   lissa — the light of my whole damn life!!! you are the kindest, most beautiful and welcoming soul i have ever met in the rpc — across all my years! you radiate literal sunshine and embody rapunzel’s entire essence tbh. if we hadn’t hit it off right away on john’s old blog, i’m not sure i ever would have become so attached to him as a muse. i love murphpunzel, i love writing with you, i love seeing you on my dash, i love our bazillion verses, i love spamming you with photosets and getting all your snaps (even though i suck at sending them rip). i can’t wait for rona to be over so i can come to LI for a proper visit 🥺stay gold. ilysm!!

@rippaers​ ( & @phosphaenes​ )   /   rissaaa!1!1! FIRST OF ALL ??? how dare you have the best portrayal of stefan in the whole world and steal my whole heart by our accidental ship. i wouldn’t trade our dumb boys for anything. thank you for tolerating all the angst i put you through and being patient while i was on & off hiatus last year. you are truly a gem and you have altered my tumblr rpc experience for the absolute better. i adore you to the moon and back and i’d like you to stay forever kthx. i love youu!! 💞

@itwcntsurviveme​ ( & @lifecrumblesdown​ )   /   jenn ! what can i even put here? god damn you’ve been with me since the BEGINNING. OVER TEN YEARS DUDE. through all our ups and downs, we pull through stronger than ever and i love you so much. our friendship means the world to me and i can’t wait for more california shenanigans once its safe to travel again. thank you for being patient with me as a flaky writing partner lksdglksg, thank you for introducing me to the 100 (and merlin... and glee... the list goes on) and for convincing me to write murphy in the first place and for just — being you. you are so talented and wonderful and don’t let anyone change you. 🥰

❛   I LOVE TALKING & INTERACTING WITH YOU XOXO STAY FOREVER !   ❜

@astralsparks , @aniimus , @capitolkept , @coalitioned , @damnbrain , @damnbird , @damnfoxed , @damnstory , @dngerclose , @earthsplita , @emorality , @faitholy , @gonpleiga , @gracefallen , @guiltey , @headsaves , @headstrongblake , @iswarholy , @lightborrowcd​ , @luminee , @maelindas , @mercyburned , @natshana , @omenbrought , @pyrrhicmessiah , @rebellmade , @saeance , @securcity , @shenomaly , @skysplita , @softsurvivor , @sounset , @speispy , @stonedgilbert , @sunpathos , @tentakilled , @thrillor , @tragedyhymns , @triquetrae , @trustedsecond , @veradeir , @victeur , @waldenborn , @youthblamed

❛   I ADORE YOU ON MY DASH SO LET’S BREAK THE ICE !   ❜

@aigonakru​ , @allfairydust , @azgedaspy​ , @bloodiva​ , @casanovarogue​ , @chemicalcasualty​, @clearwatrs , @commandied​ , @connectere , @damnanger​ , @damntender​ , @deathes​ , @deathlye​ , @deathstroyed​ , @denieddeath , @diversestimulation , @drmslst , @eclipseloved , @eiightisgreat , @ekouing​, @endbrother , @geneticassassin​ , @grawpish , @graunblida​, @guardraised​ , @heartsaves​ , @herbaelogist,  @heromiones , @impulsivitytm​ , @inkfated , @insecurites , @intelwon , @irreparabiles , @klarkes​ , @legatium​ , @lchnss​ , @lightbringer , @markedwrath , @martyir , @newbrn , @oceanforged , @ourstories​ , @petrovanity​ , @preytend​ , @prlman​ , @pumpcursed​ , @redemptioninterlude​ , @seesgood​ , @sheassassin​ , @vandbaerer​, @valucble​ , @voteno , @warstroyed​ , @wearycrown​ , @wickeid 

❛   THE MORE MURPHIES (SP?) , THE MERRIER !   ❜

@heroach , @hevives , [ tf should i change my url to match your guys’ somehow like the iconic trio we are 🥺] , & @survivormoves​

❛   ROLEPLEIKRU !   ❜

if i forgot any members of the server — sldgkjsldg i’m the worst rip. thank you guys for making it such a special place, for making us an ohana in this little rpc. you guys are all treasured so very much! ♡ if you’re a fan of the 100 and you like making new friends — come join our little social server here! we’d love to have you!

[theatreslave]

Recovery

Chapter One

Drea Mikami silenced her cellphone for the third time in ten minutes. It was ringing incessantly, receiving calls from a number she didn’t recognize. She was supposed to be concentrating on paperwork but the sinking feeling that had started in her stomach two weeks ago when the number called her for the first time, was growing.

The phone rang again and she silenced just as her partner Michaela Stone-Landon reached her desk.

“You’re popular.” Michaela said with a raised eyebrow.

“It’s nothing just asking about my vehicle warranty or whatever. I swear those telemarketers are trying to annoy me to death,” Drea replied with her usual sass, trying not to show her nerves to her partner. Her amazing partner who was soon to be leaving her for a while. “Did you finish up everything? Are you excited?”

“Yeah I tied up loose ends and I have the rest of my paperwork done. Any open cases have been transferred to different detectives, barring the ones you wanted of course,” She said fondly. Silencing her friend’s phone for her the next time it rang. “In a couple hours I will be on a flight to my honeymoon, stress free!”

“I’m really happy for you Mick. I hate you for leaving me here by myself but how could I stop such a happy couple from enjoying their private time! Just make sure to have a few margaritas for me. Or better yet a few mai tais.” Drea laughed.

“You gonna be ok? I know Bowers assigned you to work with Jared while I’m gone.” Michaela asked, feeling a bit awkward.

Drea scoffed, “It’s just Jared. Afraid I’ll steal him away?”

“You can have him. Just don’t let him sulk too much ok. And take it easy on him. Your unending enthusiasm might actually make him smile and he might get a cramp in his face.” She joked.

“Oh trust me Mrs.Landon, I will make sure your ex-boy toy has nothing else to worry about except how to shut me up.” Drea stood up next to her partner and gave her a hug. “He’ll be ok Mic. He’s a big boy. I’m sure under all that brooding he is happy for you. Jared is just a passionate guy and you were all he was passionate about for a while.”

Drea released Mick from her hug. Mick nodded in agreement. “I know. He was all I knew for a long time too but Zeke, he’s everything and more. I can’t explain it. We are more than just soul mates. It’s deeper than that.”

“I know it is. I mean he survived against all odds because of you. So don’t worry, a dose of MIkami and me gushing over all the nauseatingly cute pictures you send me from your trip, will turn Jared off of you forever.” Drea was more than confident that she would have some fun while Mick was away. “And speak of the Devil.”

Jared Vasquez, newly appointed lieutenant, strode into the precinct confidently. He shrugged off his jacket and paused before scanning the bullpen and spotting the two women next to Mikami’s desk.

“It’s our big strong lieutenant back from a successful mission,” Drea teased. “I was just saying ‘bon voyage’ to the newly wed before she leaves tonight.”

Jared chuckled a bit then turned to Michaela, “Have a safe trip, and come back on time. Or if you’re going to disappear, take me with you this time.”

Michaela smacked the man’s arm, then gave him a hug as well. “I’ll be back, I promise. Be nice to Drea ok. I don’t wanna come back here and find out that you made her cry.”

“Like he could make me cry!”

“I’m not that mean!”

Drea’s phone rang and she absentmindedly silenced it again. Jared noticed but ignored it, figuring that she didn’t want to interrupt the conversation.

“So Vasquez, was it a successful mission?” Drea diverted.

“Yup, finally caught those Irish mobsters after, what, 6 months of tailing them. I am ready for something simple after all that.” Jared said as he loosened his tie and unbuttoned his top button.

“Congratulations! That’s great I know how that case has been bothering you. Using their prep-school sons as drug mules was a new low.” Michaela said with a sad look as she started packing up her bag at her desk just across from Drea’s.

Drea’s phone rang again and this time she flinched. Michaela reached over and silenced it again. Before Jared could ask what was up with that Michaela was ready to head off.

“I will see you guys in a month. I’ll send you guys some pictures. Call me if you need anything. But only if it’s urgent.” Michaela said with a wink and then waved as she walked out of the precinct.

“Aww they grow up so fast.” Drea said, wiping away a fake tear.

Jared stared at her for a second before rolling his eyes, “Make sure your weirdness doesn’t rub off on me.”

“I’m not weird! I’m just confident in my uniqueness.” Drea stuck her tongue out at him, “At least I know how to have fun.”

Her cellphone rang again. Jared finally lost his battle against his own curiosity and swiped Drea's phone and answered it. “Hello, you’re calling this phone an awful lot and it’s really starting to get annoying.”

Drea’s eyes were wide as saucers as she tried to take the phone from the much taller man in front of her. “Jared, what the hell! Give that back.”

“Who are you? Why are you answering this call?” A male voice answered. The tone he used alarmed Jared.

“Hey man, just stop calling this number ok. She doesn’t want to talk to you. And you’re making it so I can’t even enjoy the silence of a nearly empty precinct.” Jared scoffed.

“Are you that bitch’s new lap dog? She’ll curse you like she did to me. She’ll ruin you. Drea I know you’re there! You fucking bitch!” The man would have been foaming at the mouth if he were in front of Jared.

Drea finally pulled the phone from Jared’s grasp and disconnected the call. Jared was shocked then angry. “ Drea what the hell was that? Who was that? Are you in trouble?”

“Jared, it's nothing. I promise. Just some guy that’s mad that I didn’t go on a second date with him. Don’t worry about it. I was gonna get a new phone tomorrow anyway.” Drea just shut her phone off and tried to busy herself at her desk.

Jared took a moment to stare at her then went to his desk to grab a couple things, threw his jacket back on and then found his way back to her desk. “Grab what you need, the day is over and I am taking you to get a new phone.”

“Jared you really don’t have to do this,” Drea refused.

“I don’t but I’m not going to have a sleepless night thinking about that grim reaper calling you every ten minutes, so let’s move Mikami.” Jared said jokingly, trying to lighten the mood. At first Drea hesitated then grabbed her things and followed the Cuban man out of the precinct.

Drea sat in Jared’s passenger seat, having taken the bus that morning instead of her own car. It was silent as they made their way to the closest AT&T store. She played with her fingers feeling nervous for some reason.

“Do you need help getting a restraining order?” Jared asked, keeping his eye on the busy evening streets of New York.

Drea considered being honest but decided against it. Her and Jared weren’t very close and she didn’t need to involve him. “Yeah but it’s not like he’s stalking me. I probably should have given him a social media account instead of my actual number.”

“Don’t take any of the blame here, Drea. If this guy is really just being an asshole because he can’t take rejection. That’s all on him. You’ve blocked his number?”

“Yeah but he just calls with new ones. But it’s ok, I have my knight in shining necktie taking me to get a new phone so everything should be fine.” Drea teased, hoping the topic would be dropped.

“Brat,” Jared glanced at her, “If you ever need my help with some dude, don’t hesitate to ask. I know I may not be the best guy but I won’t stand for any of you girls getting treated like shit.”

“Thank you, Jared. Really it means a lot. But I don’t think this will be a big deal so don’t worry too much. That wrinkle between your brows will just get deeper.”

“I do not have a wrinkle!” Jared shot back as he parked the car. “Come on, let's go.”

“You’re coming with me?” Drea asked, surprised.

“And what, leave you here to take a night bus or taxi by yourself? Not a chance, especially after that phone call. We are getting you a new phone then you are buying me dinner for driving you around.” Jared said as they both exited the car and made their way across the street.

“How about I just cook you something? I was going to make some ramen when I got home anyway.” Drea said, smiling at Jared, honestly relieved to not be alone.

“That sounds like a deal. Just don’t poison me ok.” Jared joked as he pulled the store door open for her.

“You’ll see. Unlike Michaela I am an amazing cook!” Drea smacked Jared’s shoulder lightly as she walked past him.

The process of getting a new phone was a bit of a hassle as it always is. The minute Drea turned her old phone on, to transfer data, it started pinging with ‘missed call’ notifications followed by more calls from mystery numbers.

Jared looked a bit concerned but as soon as the service was cut off the phone stopped chiming. Drea opted for a Samsung, switching her allegiances, as the sales rep called it. It made transferring her phone numbers and data a little incomplete but Jared made sure to grab her phone and edit his contact information for her.

“Hey I literally just got that!” Drea said after saying ‘goodbye’ to the young man who helped her with her phone.

“I’m just making sure you have me saved properly.” Jared said with a laugh before snapping a picture of himself. “There ya go.”

Jared handed her the new phone as they both made it back to his car. Once they were both seated and Jared had her address in the GPS, Drea finally had a chance to look at his contact info. He had taken a quick selfie with a smile on his face from that dumb angle that guys always take it from. And had saved himself as Jared “Knight in Shining Necktie” Vasquez.

“You’re honestly a giant dork under all that machismo, aren’t you?” Drea smiled as she looked over at him.

“Only around my friends. So keep it a secret. Now are you really going to cook for me or am I just dropping you off? I’m starving after that kid couldn’t stop talking about Samsung being better than Apple blah blah blah. “ Jared said as he made his way down her street.

“Hey, we made a deal. Plus you were right, I definitely prefer this over taking the bus or subway. You can just have the valet take your car. Jonathan will take care of it.” Drea said as they pulled up to an upper class apartment building. Jared let out a low whistle.

“Your apartment complex has a valet? I knew you came from money Drea, but come on now.” Jared said, looking in awe as he stopped the car and spotted the valet driver.

“Jonathan, you’ll take care of Jared’s car won’t you.” Drea asked happily as she made her way into the building.

“Of course, Ms. Mikami. Will the Sir be spending the night?”

“Jonathan! You’re scandalous. Jared is just having dinner with me as a favor so don’t you go reporting to my mother about anything.” Drea teased the older gentleman.

“Of course Miss. Have a wonderful dinner.”

Jared watched the exchange and couldn’t help but chuckle at Drea’s cheerful manner. He followed Drea through the lobby to the elevators which were just as extravagant as the front of the building. “I’m guessing your mother likes to keep an eye on you.”

“She’s always been a tiger mom. She never did forgive me for going into law enforcement and now she wants me to apologize by getting married to one of her friends’ sons.” Drea scoffed. They made it to her apartment and she swiftly let them in.

Jared was pleased to see that her apartment was rather simple but lived in. She had a cat, or he figured she did from the litter box in the corner of the living room that opened up from the front door.

“You can hang your jacket up right there. And take off your shoes please!” Drea called as she rushed into what he assumed was the kitchen to work on their dinner. “Have a look around while I cook. And if you see Mimi, she’s friendly, I promise!.”

“You named your cat ‘Mimi’?” Jared asked as he made his way further into the apartment. He noticed a VR headset promptly displayed next to the TV, a bookcase filled to the brim, and that most of her furniture was a dark cherry color. The depth of which was offset by her cream colored walls and the shine of her lights off the various mirrors that helped make her apartment feel larger than it was.

“Yeah, why? You don’t like it?” Drea called back. The sounds of running water and then the telltale chop of a knife on a cutting board filled the apartment.

“Mimi Mikam? It’s cute.” Jared said with a laugh. He stood at the threshold of the kitchen.

“And she’s cute. If you haven’t seen her then she will come out when I bring her food out,” Drea said absentmindedly as she busied herself with the bowling water and what looked like noodles.

“Where’s your bathroom? I wanna wash up.” Jared asked, not wanting to try and find out himself in case he got accused of snooping. Not that he wasn’t a little interested in the inner workings of his silver spoon fed coworker.

“Just keep going down the hall past the living room. The first door on the right. The door on the left is the guest bedroom. The one at the end of the hall is my room, and across from it is a closet.” Drea answered not looking up from the meat she was slicing.

“Thanks. Not that I needed a full floor plan,” Jared replied as he turned to the hallway.

“I’m just being thorough. Like I am with this food you’re going to love by the way,” Drea shot back.

Jared just chuckled to himself as he walked down the hall, flicking a light switch as he went. The hall was longer than he expected. He found the bathroom easily and washed his hands. He pulled off his tie, finally letting himself relax after the long day. The Lieutenant looked at himself in the mirror, taking in the littering of grey hairs and the deepening crease between his brows. Jared let out a long sigh, he really wasn’t getting any younger. He shook his head and let his mind focus on the enigma that was Drea and her mystery caller. He had a feeling there was more to this than some stilted “nice guy” but he didn’t want to pry. He wasn’t as close to Drea as Michaela but hopefully a month as partners would remedy that.

Jared exited the bathroom only to hear the sound of something falling in what he now knew was Drea’s bedroom.

“Jared,” Drea called from the kitchen.

“Yeah?” Jared called back, his sense on high alert and his hand on his gun which was still at his belt.

“Can you make sure Mimi didn’t knock over the glass I keep on my bedside? She does that sometimes when she realizes I’m home,” Drea requested.

“Yea sure,” Jared let out a sigh of relief and then made his way down the hall. The door to her room was already ajar. Knowing that Drea asked him to check made it easier for him to flick the light switch and enter her bedroom. Jared chuckled to himself, “I guess this is one way to get into a woman’s bedroom.”

Drea’s bedroom was the definition of feminine sophistication. She had a four post canopy bed with light gauzy curtains that were pulled open. Her sheets were a cream color with mauve accents. The wood of her furniture matched the furniture in the rest of her apartment. Her side tables matched and had gold filigree lamps atop them. The carpets were plush and squishy under Jared’s socked feet. He noticed an empty glass laying haphazardly on the floor and moved to pick it up. The glass was placed neatly back on her bedside table.

Jared took a moment to snoop, unable to help himself. There was a small porcelain tree next to her lamp. A ring holder. He did notice she always wore a pinky ring on her left hand and a plain gold band on her right ring finger. A simple brush lay next to it along with a novel. Something horror related from the looks of the cover. Across from the foot of the bed was a dresser and next to that a vanity. In the opposite corner was a desk and a door that he assumed led to the master bathroom.

His attention turned at the soft mewl of Mimi who made herself known. She appeared and with the usual agility of a cat, hopped on to the vanity. That’s when Jared noticed that Drea’s window was open. She hadn’t been in here since they arrived and he doubted that she left it open by accident. Jared shut the window and did a quick sweep of the room. Once satisfied that no one was hiding in the room he turned back to Mimi.

“You wouldn’t be in here if there was an intruder right?” Mimi just blinked up at him. She was a short haired cat. Small and white, with striking blue eyes. She mewed at him and made a movement trying to rub up against him. Jared wasn’t a cat person but he had to admit she was cute. He stepped closer and tentatively reached out a hand. Mimi happily bumped her head against his palm asking for pets.

Jared smiled down at the cat just as Drea called, “Dinner’s ready! Quit snooping and come back out here.”

Jared slowly picked up the snow white cat and was surprised to see how easily she curled into him and purred. He held her to his chest, scratching her head as he made his way back to the kitchen where Drea had set a table for two at the small dining table. “Hey, I wasn’t snooping, I was bonding. See.”

Drea turned and smiled at the sight of the normally stoic detective holding her purring white cat while he scratched her head. “ Aww that’s so cute. Mimi likes you.”

“By the way did you leave your window open? I closed it for you. You should be more careful.” Jared said as he took a seat. Finally he relinquished his hold on Mimi who was more than happy to make her way to her food bowl which Drea had filled.

Drea hesitated then sat down as well, “Uh, yeah I must have forgotten about it when I went to work this morning. Thanks. I really should wake up earlier. Anyway, here we are, a Mikami special. Tonkatsu ramen and shredded seaweed chicken rolls with a side of rice.”

“Wow, it definitely smells better than anything Mick has ever tried to make,” Jared joked..

“Dig in. You had a long successful day and this is our first time hanging out as partners.” Drea said, “Thank you for coming with me to get a new phone too.”

“If I get fed like this every time I might have to do you more favors.” Jared happily dug in.

They chatted throughout dinner enjoying the food and eventually opening up a bottle of wine. Drea reasoned that they were both off tomorrow anyway. Jared, having loosened up, asked Drea about the VR headset he saw and she was more than happy to teach him how to use it. And that’s how they ended up in the living room, Jared exhausted after playing a shooting game and Drea exhausted from laughing so hard at his irritation.

“You know, I should get one of these. It’s like working out without a gym.” Jared said between breaths as he turned off the headset and returned it to its stand.

“I never took you for a gamer. But I must say that was definitely entertaining. You get way too competitive.” Drea said with a laugh. “You should just bunk out in my spare room. It’s late and we drank the whole bottle.”

“Are you sure? I’m not drunk or anything.” Jared realized it was nearing 2 a.m.

“You still drank. We’re cops Jared, we have to set a good example. And you won’t have to worry about me drunkenly jumping you in bed, the spare room has a lock.” Drea said cheekily as she started cleaning up the errant wine glasses and napkins.

“Let me do that then. You cooked and let me stay so I will wash the dishes. Go get ready for bed.” Jared insisted as he started picking up bowls and utensils.

“Yes dad, “ Drea joked as she let him take over, a yawn escaping her mouth.

“I prefer Daddy.” Jared quipped before he could stop himself. Drea let out a laugh and threw a pillow at him. “In your dreams Vasquez.”

He caught the pillow laughing as he cleaned up the remains of their dinner. It wasn’t until he was nearly done with the dishes that he felt the wine headache coming on. Drea met him in the hallway with some extra towels and a pair of sweats that were much too large to be her actual size.

“Here. So you can wash up and change. You’re lucky I like to wear big mens sweats when I’m home by myself. I will be off to bed now. Goodnight Jared.” Drea said nonchalantly as she handed him the pile then made her way back to her room, picking up Mimi who had been winding around her legs.

“Thanks Drea, goodnight.” Jared said. He washed up in the bathroom then went into the guest bedroom to change. It was simpler than her bedroom and slightly smaller but still had the plush carpet and elegant side tables. He took off his shirt and pants, hanging them up in the empty closet, then unfolded the sweats. They were a bit loose on him but were worn in. He could tell from the creases that Drea normally folded the legs up quite a bit. His eyes barely staying open, he hopped into the bed, thinking for a moment about how he ended up here. A ghost of a smile on his face as he drifted off to sleep.

Saying goodnight to Jared was an odd feeling but not bad. Drea definitely didn’t think her day would end with Jared Vasquez sleeping in her apartment. But as she went over the events of the day, it seemed to be an appropriate ending. Drea was about to climb into bed when she noticed something green on her vanity.

As she walked across the room and started to recognize the object, her blood ran cold. She stood less than a foot away, staring down at the handmade Valentine’s Day card wishing it would burst into flames. She looked up at the window next to the vanity, the one that had been open. For a split second panic filled her at the idea that he had made his way into her apartment. But Jared would have noticed, he wouldn’t let her get hurt. He wasn’t here but he had been.

Drea swiftly walked to the kitchen and grabbed some chopsticks and a ziplock bag, hoping her movements wouldn’t wake Jared. She was back in her room with the door shut behind her. She paused again, staring across the room at the offensive item. Until she let her anger surge up within her and drive her forward. She used the chopsticks effortlessly and put the card into the ziplock bag before shoving it in a bottom drawer of her vanity.

Breathing heavily she made her way to her bed. Hoping she would be able to get some sleep. Hoping the vents of the past two days wouldn’t send her spiraling back into her nightmares.

AND THATS IT FOR CHAPTER ONE. SOON TO BE ADDED TO AO3 and FANFIC.NET

[snowdice]

Road Trips and Missing Persons (Part 8)

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Relationships: Patton & Virgil, Virgil & Deceit, Logan & Patton, Emile & Remy, Roman & Remus & Janus

Characters: Patton, Virgil, Deceit, Remus, Roman, Logan, Emile, Remy

Summary: Patton was just getting groceries. The next thing he knew, there was a knife at his throat and he was an unwilling uber driver. Virgil’s on the run after the murder of his dad, and it’s not just his paranoia that’s telling him he’s being chased down. He has to get somewhere safe, somewhere he can trust, and all he has is a couple of stories from his dad and a name: “Green Bellow Foods and Dispensary.”

Notes: Secret Agents AU, knives, carjacking, kidnapping, murder mentioned, guns mentioned, pepper spray, blood mentioned, drugs mentioned (more to be added)

This is a fic I’ve been writing on study breaks that you have probably all already seen at this point. I’ve affectionately named it the Goblin Brain Fic because it’s helping my brain actually get motivated for studying. I’ve slightly edited it for wording and grammar, but not for content from my previous posts. Feel free to send in asks to direct it because I’m not 100% sure where this is going and you can help decide if you feel so inclined! You can see the process I went through to build this at this link.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 My Master Post

“What the fuck do you mean Virgil is missing?” Remy asked.

“That’s the second thing Logan said to me!” Emile said. “When he heard you died, he sent an agent over to check on Virgil, but there’d been signs of a break in and Virgil was gone. They don’t think he actually got kidnapped though because the car of whoever broke in was still there.”

“Well, then where the hell is my kid?!!” Remy yelled.

Emile flinched at his suddenly loud voice. “Leaping lizards Remy, I don’t know. I thought you did since you’re not actually dead.”

“Well I don’t!”

“Yeah, I’m getting that, calm down for a second.”

“Okay, right now is not a good time to tell me to calm down,” Remy said. “My kid is missing.”

“I know Remy,” Emile said in his professionally soothing voice, “but we have to think in order to do something about that.” Oh, he was thinking. He was thinking really hard right about now. He was thinking about how the person who sent someone to kidnap his son was the woman who’d just tried to have him fucking executed. God, Remy hadn’t even wanted her around his fucking kid when she’d just been a bitch and not an enemy agent out for his blood.

“We should call Logan back,” Emile suggested. “He might have more information.”

“No,” Remy said. “It’s still too risky.”

“Remy.”

“I said no, Emile,” Remy snapped. “What if she has him and intercepts the phone call. She doesn’t have any reason to hurt him right now,” other than the fact that he had quite the mouth on him and would probably piss her off by being a little shit especially if she wouldn’t tell him where Remy was, “but if she knows I’m alive she might.”

“Would she really…?”

“The woman just tried to shoot me with poisoned bullets. I wouldn’t put it past her.”

“Poison bull-? It’s not important,” Emile said. “If we’re not going to get information from Logan then how are we supposed to even start with finding Virgil?”

“Easy,” Remy said. “The tracker I put on him.”

“I’m sorry you put what on Virgil?” Emile asked.

“A tracker,” Remy said. “It’s in that bracelet he always wears. I don’t really want to go back to the house, but I think I left one of the devices to find him in here in case of emergencies.” He started digging through Emile’s glove box.

“Jiminy Crickets, you can’t just put a tracker on your teenage son Remy!”

“Why not?” Remy asked, still digging through the papers. Did Emile ever get rid of old insurance cards and also how many drive-through napkins did he need to keep?

“It’s an invasion of privacy,” Emile sputtered.

Remy waved him off. “Oh, please. I’m a secret agent, a (usually) off duty one, but still a secret agent. Sometimes I need to know where my kid’s at. Like now. Besides, I told him what it was when I gave it to him, and it lights up when activated. He can just chuck it out a window if he doesn’t want me knowing where he is.”

“Oh, well that’s okay then,” Emile said.

Remy hummed as his hand closed around the phone sized device hidden at the back of the glove box. “Ah, here it is.”

“When exactly did you put that in here.”

“Like two years ago,” Remy said. “Clean your car every once in a while.”

“Remington, I have seen your garage.”

“Maybe, but I never claim to be responsible.”

The thing was out of charge, so he plugged it into the car, and it booted up pretty quickly. Emile leaned over to look at the map that popped up. Remy pushed a couple of buttons to activate the tracker.

A red dot appeared on the map and Remy blinked at it. “Where the fuck?” he asked. He pushed another button and the device beeped, finding Remy’s current location on the map and putting a green dot there. The map had to zoom out quite a bit to fit both dots on the screen. A number appeared at the top of the map. “Shit.”

“Please tell me that’s feet,” Emile groaned.

“How the hell did he manage to get 50 miles away? I’ve been ‘dead’ for less than an hour and a half!”

“Did one of Barbara’s people get to him?”

“I’m not… he’s moving in the wrong direction if that’s the case,” Remy said. “Her house is in town and the secret base I know of is north of here. He’s going south east on the interstate.” He squinted at the map.

“Well then where is he going and how is he going there?” Emile asked.

“I’m not sure, but you need to start driving.” Emile hesitated for a moment. “Now.”

He nodded and put the car in reverse before pulling out of the parking lot and turning toward the interstate.

“Hey, Emile,” Remy said pleasantly after about 2 minutes. “Remember how mother said to not speed unless it was absolutely necessary?” Emile glanced at him out of the corner of his eye. “It’s absolutely necessary today.”

Emile gave him a slightly disapproving frown, but the car did speed up.

“So, what about poisoned bullets?” Emile asked.

“I’ve had a long day,” Remy said.

“Nope, no, you’re not getting away with that,” Emile said.

“We’re busy,” Remy tried.

“Assuming he continues to move in the same direction, we have over an hour car ride in front of us. So, talk.”

“You and talking,” Remy mumbled. “Why couldn’t you just be a secretive, suppressed secret agent like everyone else in our family.”

Emile shot him a glare.

“Emmmmmmmyyyyyyy,” Remy whined.

“Remington.”

“Okay… so it may have, sort of been, my idea.”

“Remy.”

“See, this is why I didn’t want to talk about it.”

“Please, tell me this is not why you wanted me to watch Virgil tonight,” Emile said.

Oh, yeah… Remy winced.

“Remy, you have to at least tell me if you’re getting me and Virgil involved in this sort of thing. Or better yet, not do that. What was I supposed to do if someone had come to the door to kidnap Virgil? Which they did, by the way!”

Remy shifted in his seat. “To be fair, the plan didn’t exactly go how I expected it to. You were just a precaution in case it took too long. I didn’t expect to ‘die.’ Or at least if she was going to try to kill me I though she’d hesitate more than 0 seconds.”

Emile spared him a glare as he merged onto the interstate.

“Okay, fine, so maybe I should have,” Remy admitted, “but she was up to no good! And I know I’m supposed to still be on desk duty, but I’d heard through the grapevine about her plans and, I mean, I was in the neighborhood. How was I supposed to know she’d see right through my lie about asking for money to buy Virgil a car?”

“Maybe because you’ve never asked the woman for anything, ever, especially in relation to Virgil and Virgil hasn’t even taken drivers ed because he’s still too scared to try to drive after the golf cart incident.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever babe,” Remy brushed him off. “Anyway, we were talking, and I think she maybe got a little pissy that I wasn’t drinking the wine she gave me. It was probably poisoned now that I’m thinkin’ about it. Anyway, she must have finally gotten tired of me and pushed a button. Suddenly a bunch of guards were storming the room and, man, they were definitely the shoot first, ask question types ‘cause they immediately started shooting at me. Luckily I was wearing the light weight bullet proof vest Logan’d gotten me and I dove under her desk and, let me tell you, for how organized she is about her criminal empire and how clean the rest of the house is, she doesn’t clean much under her desk. I think it’s probably ‘cause she doesn’t let any of the maids in there to clean. Honestly, that might be where Janus gets the whole leaving snack wrappers and tissues all over the house. Because gee her desk. And-”

“Remy.”

“Right, so, there I was under her absolutely filthy desk and I look up and she’s standing there staring at me and she just takes out a gun and bang shoots at my head. Luckily it missed, but it ricocheted off her desk and ended up in my calf.”

“You were shot in the calf!”

“It’s not a big deal, I’m fine,” Remy said. “Anyway, those were the poisoned bullets.”

“You got shot with a poisoned bullet?!”

“Yeah, so, luckily it was a poison I got doused with once in Italy in my 20s and if you manage to survive it once, you’re good forever or whatevs, but like, I knew she thought it would kill me so I played dead. So, then after that, she called in Gilbert, you know Gilbert, the butler with the little trapezoid shaped beard? Yeah, so Gilbert comes in and she’s like, “get rid of his body” and he’s like “cool beans” or something to that extent. Anyway, he drags me out’a there, but the thing is Gilbert’s cool or maybe not cool because he’d totally bury my body without flinching, but he’s cool enough not to kill me himself or even run and tattle. So, I go, ‘yeah, not dead,’ and he’s like ‘Kay, but don’t tell her I knew that,’ and I’m like ‘jolly good, mate.’ Then I run off to her office (the secret one, not the one her and the armed guards are in) and steal the flashdrive. I go to get in my car, but she already ordered it to get blown up! I mean, rude, bitch! At least give my body time to cool. So, I end up hiding in the back of the catering company van that had come to get the kitchen ready for the gala she’s throwing later tonight which, I mean really, you’re serving shrimp and salmon, what type of monster are you? You do seafood and steak, not seafood and seafood. Ugh. Why did I ever have sex with her again? Anyway, I ride in the van to town and then bolt out of there before they can see me. Then, I get on a bus because I have a bus token in my wallet, but the bus driver is a bit chatty and this is a covert mission so I tell him my name is Gilbert, since Gilbert the butler was on my mind and that I am visiting my new granddaughter in the states but I’m actually from Quebec and I spoke French to prove it. I was going to get off near the one clothes shop on third, but then we drove by your office and I saw your car so I got off at the corner and picked your lock to get in your car and waited for you to come out because I thought that’d be quicker.”

“You’re doing the thing,” Emile said.

“What thing?” Remy asked flippantly.

“The thing where you use misdirection and slang to attempt to distract people from serious issues.”

Remy slunk down in his seat. “Ah, that thing.” Damn him and his stupid fancy psychology degrees.

“Is your leg okay?”

“Smarts like a bitch, but it was just a graze. I already bandaged it up and disinfected it.”

“Good,” Emile said. “Would you prefer if I yelled at you in chronological or alphabetical order.”

“I’d like to see you try out alphabetical.”

“Well,” Emile started. “First of all…”

Want to read more? Click below!

AO3 Part 9

[miss-choco-chips]

Twisted soulmates

BIG Thank you to @iphoenixrising who let me babble on chat about this idea, and to @the-sky-is-a-lie who is an awesome sweetheart and read and edited this for me (THANK YOU!)

---------------------------

Tim has three names on one wrist. His soulmates. Tim has one name on the other wrist. His nemesis.

...or are they?

Tim gets his first mark the night the Graysons fell, ‘Richard John Grayson’ forever tattooed on him, the otherwise unblemished white skin of his left wrist almost shining in contrast to the new addition.

Young, he might be, but not stupid; never stupid. Neither of his parents would approve of a circus artist, perfect as he may be in Tim’s wide opened eyes, so he had to be smart about this. His mind hasn’t stopped whirling since the little touch that burned Dick’s name on him and vice versa, all kind of plans on how to broach the subject with the adults, how to make Dick like him beyond the promised love of a soulmate, every possibility dancing through his eyes, while his parents look for their seats at the stands none the wiser.

He's planning on asking his mom to stay after the show, so he might properly introduce himself to this marvelous trapezist, maybe proclaim an interest in the training - anything that could improve his overall abilities was a good thing in Janet’s eyes, and having her on board would be enough to force his father to accept. He’s excited at the prospect, and a part of him thinks Dick, up the trapeze getting ready for his act, feels the same. That he could feel, through the bond that snapped in place when the other kid first touched him, an echo of his own happiness, a joy at finding, so soon in life, something as beautiful as this. 

He’s going to stay after the show. He’ll talk to Dick, introduce himself properly, be as mature as possible- Dick wouldn’t want a dumb kid as his soulmate. Maybe even make friends with this wonderful boy that can fly and is destined to love him.

(Love him, him, him. He can’t wrap his head around this strange concept of being on the receiving end of something strong and wonderful. He might cry.)

Then the tragedy occurs, and  Tim's too traumatized to think about doing anything about it. He can't pester a grieving boy with this. They are kids after all, and it’s not like their bond is going anywhere. 

(I don’t want to wait, please don’t forget about me, please love me.)

---.---

Dick has just been adopted, his entire worldview had changed, adding a soulmate to care about would be just too mean of him. Tim can take care of himself, even when sometimes, after his parents left for yet another trip, he yearns for someone to hold his hand after a nightmare. To brush his hair back and hug him.

But that’s just the child in him. He doesn’t need it to live, it’s just a silly comfort thing to wish for, like the baby blanket his mother had made the servants take away once Tim turned four. So he keeps quiet. He waits. 

Dick’s name is on his left wrist, after all. He is his soulmate.

----.----

He gets his second mark years later, when the Batcave’s security is breached and some strange men attack Bruce. The giant penny is too tall, but he still get a good look at the man below it, and something in his gut twists. It all makes sense a few minutes later, when Bruce is fighting someone else and the man in green robes pushes Tim aside, holding him hostage to get the Batman’s cooperation. 

The skin on his wrist, the one that doesn't have Dick's promised love tattooed on it, burns. He doesn’t dare look down, aware of how taking your eyes from the predator in the room could mean instant death. He doesn’t need to, anyway; he already knows.

Tim’s pretty sure this is his nemesis, because no way he'd be destined to hate Dick and love this criminal, and they are on opposite wrists. So… getting away is the first step on his ‘do not interact with this terrorist until I’m significantly better at defending myself’ plan. Easy peasy.

He catches the side glance the man shoots him, because of course he also felt the burn, and there’s curiosity there. Something akin to amusement, which, Tim can get behind, he’s also seeing the irony of this, the utterly ridiculousness of him being important enough in the grand scheme of things to warrant being tattooed on this man’s skin.

There’s also possessiveness there, which isn’t fun at all. Stranger danger, his mind screams at him.

His nemesis shouldn’t be possessive of him, unless he has a really fucked up view of his enemies, in a ‘their death is mine, and mine only’ way. Because this is his nemesis, there's no doubt in his mind of that. 

Dick is on his other wrist, after all, and he is his soulmate.

----.----

Bruce goes mental when he finds out later, and almost blows a gasket. Ra’s, as Tim later finds out his nemesis is called, is suddenly one upping the Joker on Batman’s high priority enemies list, which means only a glimpse of him anywhere near the city borders would warrant a call to Superman, Bruce’s ultimate last resort. That’s how big this is.

Young Justice has split feelings on the matter. Cissie and Cassie, ever the bloodthirsty ones in Tim’s humble opinion, suggest tracking the man down before he can get to their leader, and taking him out of the game. Probably permanently. Kon seems torn, half with the girls, half with Bart, who finds the whole thing amusing and exciting. Ra’s Al Ghul, one of the most dangerous enemies the Justice League ever faced, and little old Robin is his fated enemy. Not Superman, not Wonder Woman, not Batman himself; just their Rob. That, according to the speedster, is so, so, so crash. The rest of the team, if they have opinions, keep them to themselves. It takes a while to calm the room down and focus on their mission of the day, but he eventually succeeds.

Dick, on his part, comes back from where he was brooding with the Titans after a fight with his mentor to fret over Tim, and everything is right in the world. 

He isn't afraid of Ra's. He has his new family, new friends, and soulmate.

----.----

There’s something on his pillow when he gets back from the weekend with his friends. 

A perfect rose, white as snow, thorns so sharp Tim knows they would pierce skin if touched. Not that he would be so stupid as to do it, not when foes like Ivy existed.

But… there’s a ribbon, and it sends ice through his veins. A red ribbon, tied at the stem’s exact center. A flower with a ribbon, the universal symbol of soulmates.

He’s pretty sure Dick’s back in San Francisco. Which leaves...

No.

He squares his shoulders and searches in his bag for his Robin gauntlets, protecting his hands with them as he disposes of the rose.

His right hand stings a little through the entire process.

----.----

When he gets his third mark, he's honestly surprised. As well as on the edge of unconsciousness from blood loss.

The blood flooding his airways is his, and the building that he believed was his safe place would never feel like that again. His knocked out friends litter the hallways, the bo staff he tried to use to defend himself long lost to the fight, as this man, his hero, his Robin, his apparent Soulmate, tries to kill him.

(Their eyes meet and they feel it at the same time, the twist in their stomachs, which is what stops Jason's blade. Tim’s hand raises up, weakly, and carefully brushes against the one holding the knife. It burns, and everything goes black for a minute.) 

(Jason stops breathing. He has the Joker on one hand, and was markless on the other until now, so this runt has to be his soulmate. No way it's the deranged clown. Which means he almost....)

Jason runs away (this is Jason, his wrist claims, not the mysterious Red Hood any longer) and Tim patches himself up, does damage control with his friends, calls Batman. His heart is beating twice as fast as usual, but he tries to be logical; Jason is on the same wrist as Dick, who is his soulmate, and opposite to Ra's, who's most likely his nemesis. Ergo, Jason's gotta be his soulmate. 

His confused, probably traumatized, totally not in his right mind soulmate.

He's gotta be patient and wait. Jason surely will get better, will come back to Tim, will fix this mistake he almost made, will... will love him.

Dick is his soulmate, and calls him ‘little brother’, which hurts, but he says it with such warmth that it soothes the ache. Dick loves him. 

Jason will, too, someday.

----.----

A few weeks later, he wakes up in the middle of the night, conscious of the feeling of being watched from the shadows of his room. 

There’s the teddy bear Steph won for him at the fair some months ago, sitting on the chair near his bed where he last put it, but… odd. There’s something about it that’s not quite normal, something that wasn’t there when he went to sleep half an hour ago.

It took him less than a minute to spot it, which would still be shameful if Bruce ever found out, but he sees the unusual shine in the bear’s eye and groans, more tired than rightfully angry, feeling like the moody teenager he never actually was.

A hidden camera. This was the fifth of the year, what the hell?

Pissed off, he gets up and takes the scissors he leaves by his bedside (can’t exactly go to sleep with a birdarang there, his dad might check on him at night and freak out, but sleeping without a weapon in easy reach just makes him uncomfortable) and makes quick work of the bear, getting the device out with as minimal damage to the plushie as possible. He’ll fix it later.

Beyond done, one hand opens the window with more strength than absolutely necessary, the other flying back to gather momentum and throw the thing right at the supposedly empty shadow on the roof of the building across the street. He’s not surprised when a dark gloved hand catches it, the rest of the body still perfectly concealed by the night. Fucking ninja.

No words needed, he slams the window shut again and grumbles his way to his desk, turning on his lamp. He’s not falling asleep again tonight, so might as well work on some cases.

----.----

His fourth mark is both exciting and like a bucket of cold water. 

It's a fucking kid.

Is this how Dick felt when he first got Tim's mark? No wonder he avoided talking about the subject, this was uncomfortable as fuck. Granted, it didn't necessarily have to be a romantic soulmate, platonic soulmates were a thing too, but... still. Awkward.

Even worse because the kid didn't have another mark and, as Tim was his first, was convinced he had to be his fated nemesis. No matter how hard Tim tried to explain the opposite; after the heart stilling moment where he extended his hand for a shake and was slapped away, thus providing the skin to skin contact needed for the bond to form, the brat was sure it was nothing but a ruse to get him to lower his defenses or something. God this kid was fucked up. 

So. In short. There were two of his soulmates trying to kill him. Great. 

But... Dick was on the same wrist as them. Dick loved him. Dick was his soulmate. So Damian... Damian had to be, as well. Maybe he'd grow out if his hate, maybe it was just a phase. 

Maybe.

----.----

His mother and father were dead. Steph was dead. His two best friends were dead.

Tim was numb, going through the motions but not really feeling anything. His only source of emotion, nowadays, was his constant rage at Damian, and the adrenaline while fighting a bad guy. 

He barely slept. He couldn’t remember the last time he properly ate. The manor wasn’t comforting enough with the little assassin roaming around for him to get any shut eye, and how could Tim be sure he wasn’t going to poison his food?

Sleeping in safe houses seemed the smarter move, even when they weren’t really safe at all, judging by the ‘gifts’ that kept appearing every time he turned his back. Food - sealed and untempered with - files on whatever case he was working on, a brand of turkish coffee that he would gladly down even if it contained poison…

Flowers, hundreds of them, all white in color, tiny red ribbons tying their stems.

Tim shivered at the meaning, but no longer minded the feeling of eyes on him while he slept. Looking for hidden cameras was too much effort to be worth it, as long as there were none in the bathroom and his walk in closet. He couldn’t care less, these days. 

----.----

Jason tried to kill him. Again. In the middle of a Pit Episode, even after all Tim had done to help him, to mend their relationship.

Damian was even worse, abusing Tim any way he could, any time he got the chance to get away with it. And it was a startlingly large amount of times, considering their family should be more attentive to attempted murder. None of Tim's effort to bond ever bore fruit.

But he's still convinced they are his soulmates, so he's gotta be patient. They have to be. 

Because Dick is his soulmate, and they share a wrist.

Because Dick...

----.----

Dick betrayed him. In the worst possible way, in the most vulnerable moment of his life. When Tim needed him the most.

Jason tried to kill him. 

Damian tried to kill him.

Dick betrayed him (which was, arguably, worse).

Dick was his soulmate. Jason was his soulmate. Damian was his soulmate.

They had to be.

----.----

His quest for Batman would’ve been a lonely affair, if not for the honeyed voice whispering in his ear. The silent eyes he felt on his skin wherever he went, more heavy than his three assassin escorts’ stares.

What a crazy world it was, where Tim’s nemesis believed in him, while his first soulmate, the one he loved almost his entire life, claimed delusion. Where his nemesis sent his people to keep him alive, to keep others out of his way, while his other two sought his death.

What a crazy world indeed.

----.----

-I think we need to talk, Timothy. About this bond we share.

-I’m listening.

Timothy, he said, but it didn’t sound like his name at all. 

In his mind, it echoed something scary, something that made him shiver and tense. 

It sounded like Mine.

----.----

Ra's al Ghul was probably his soulmate. 

He's gotta be. Because there's no way Tim's fated to love three people that are just going to break his heart again and again and again.

When he goes to the League for help looking for Bruce, he steels himself in place when Ra's’ voice in his ear makes him want to flinch. He grits his teeth at the viper like words murmured in soft tones. Makes himself accept when Ra's offers to train him in the ninja arts after he successfully brought his mentor back. Clenches his fists when he's asked to dinner in a dimly lit French restaurant.

Ra's didn't retaliate when Tim blew up half his bases. He kept giving Tim pointers and praises. Seeking his company.

So he breathes in. 

He forgave Damian for being a killer, Jason for being one, too. He surely can find it in himself to forgive his actual soulmate for being a criminal. 

In time.

Right?

...Right?

----.----

Something dark and victorious twists in Ra’s chest when the Detective doesn’t flinch away from his touch, and silently accepts the white rose and red ribbon he presents before guiding him deep into the restaurant. There’s acceptance in Timothy’s eyes, reluctant but hopeful, even if he stirs away from any ‘dangerous’ topics of conversation and very firmly drops a drug test pill in his glass of water the second the waitress turns her back on them. 

Ra’s doesn’t comment on it, merely mirrors the act on his own wine (one could never be too sure, not when an enemy as interesting as this is seated across from him) before raising it for a toast. Not that the Detective was aware of the reason.

He’s got a lot to celebrate. 

Deceiving this one wasn’t easy, after all.

----.----

Later that night, alone in his room, Tim turns in the bed, his back to the cameras on the far end of the room. The movement is slow, lazy, following his usual sleeping patterns. A clumsy hand pats the mattress, blindly looking for a pillow and dragging it to his chest, face hidden by its softness. He goes lax again, peaceful and oblivious to the world around him to any lingering eye.

Once he’s sure there’s no way anyone could see him, Tim lets a slow, dangerous smile creep on his face, his heartbeat thundering in his chest, adrenaline pumping through his veins, feeling so alive it’s almost painful after all the numbness.

Ra’s was looking so smug, like the cat that got the canary. Oh, he tried to hide it, but Tim had made it his life's mission since he was twelve to understand the man to his truest essence, to be able to read him as one would a book, and practice had taught him how to play him like a cheap kazoo.

He probably shouldn’t smile, safe as he is in hiding his face in the pillow, but he can’t help it.

Deceiving Ra’s, soulmate or not, wasn’t easy.