#because I feel like I waste time in the sense that I go to lectures but don’t take anything away from them

[gatheryepens]

So an update on uni and life since it’s been about 2 weeks :)

[changisworld]

“Are you being serious?”

Fuckboy!hyunjin x reader

Word count;8,001

Summary: You & Hyunjin are finally moving into a positive direction, finals are now here though so you are both trying to focus on that, meaning you both can’t spend so much time with each other unless you both want to go insane. You tell your lecturer how well your assignments are going & he gets the bright idea to let you tutor someone in your class who is struggling a lot & is in desperate need of help… that being Hyunjins friend, Han Jisung.

18+, MDNI, SMUT WARNINGS UNDER THE CUT.

main masterlist here

part 1 here & part 2 here

ALL WARNINGS: Jealous Hyunjin, Jealous reader, Possessive Hyunjin, voyeurism??, recording, spit, creampie, fingering, oral(m rec), body worship, PIV, unprotected sex, marking, begging, dirty talk, praise, angst & fluff, crying after sex, brief aftercare (more happens off screen), soft hyunjin

-> reader is described as Hyunjins girlfriend & 'she/her' pronouns are used a few times but its brief<3

->This isn’t proofread so if there’s any errors i apologise mwah x

In the month running up to finals, you have been absolutely drowned in assessments & of course you need to pass, so for that reason, you n Hyunjin haven't spent as much time together. You do both study together every once in a while but you work a lot better on your own & he respects that, leaving you to it as he studies in his own free time.

You have both been doing well in the sense your feelings have grown for one another but college is still the same, Hyunjin still being the bubbly person, sitting with his large group of friends while you sit further at the back, but to give him credit he does openly choose to work with you for random partner tasks (which half of the girls in the same course a you now resent you for) & he brings you a drink at least once a day.

You've just submitted one of your last essays (which you're proud of of course) & now you can relax a whole lot more than you were before... until your lecturer asks you if you would like an extra few credits.

You of course say yes, knowing it will definitely help if for some reason you get marks taken off for your other grades, not thinking it would be too hard to complete, that is until he tell you what you need to do.

"Jisung has been really struggling y/n, you can really help him & I know you can since you've never had below a ninety. Don't feel pressured please, but I'm sure he would really appreciate it." He says to you, giving you a pleading look.

You sigh before just nodding your head, not wanting to let your professor down, but also don't want someone in your class to fail simply because you couldn't be bothered to help him.

You know he's really good friends with Hyunjin, him mentioning a few times & they have always sat beside one another, loving to piss off everyone around them. You know he doesn't take anything too seriously but you would feel more guilty if you didn't at least try.

"Thank you y/n. I'll be sure to tell him when I next speak to him one on one. I'll see you tomorrow & I'll have him come talk to you, if he gives you a hard time though by being an idiot, don't be afraid to stop helping him, you're not being forced." He says to you in a cheery voice as he fixes his papers, messy all over his desk. You say your goodnights to each other & you leave the building, making the short journey home.

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You get home & of course Hyunjin is already waiting for you, Tuesdays being the one day a week you promises you would spend time together, regardless of the busy schedules.

"Took you long enough, thought you had fell asleep in the damn hall. What was it he was talking to you about? I'd rather swallow a whole potato in one go than waste my time talking to that guy outside of hours, that guy hates me." Hyunjin questions, not looking up at you for more than a second as he stirs the pasta he is cooking for the both of you.

" He hates you because you made that mans hair go grey with the stress you've causes him n trust me, I almost did, we were talking about how I'm preparing for finals, he also asked me to help one of your friends with a whole lot of it." you sigh as you kick your shoes off & putting your bag on the coat peg hung up on the wall, on the tiny bit of free space that Hyunjins multiple jackets & hoodies now clogging up.

"Really? wait taste this, n who is it? Half my friends are dumbasses so you've got your work cut out, good luck to ya." Hyunjin jokes as he holds up the wooden spoon to your lips, his other hand underneath the spoon to catch any droplets.

You taste it n let out a hum of approval which makes him smile before turning around to continue stirring a few more times before going into your cupboard to grab two plates. "Your friend Jisung! I'm surprised he asked me out of all people, I've only had one actual conversation with him n that was during freshers, I only remember because he was wearing those glasses of his & kept bursting out into song randomly." you chuckle as you recall the memory, getting you both a glass before going into your fridge to grab the bottle of prosecco you bought yesterday just for this occasion.

Hyunjin stops his movement for a second before replying with a 'mhmm' & you don't think too much of it, grating some cheese before putting it on the coffee table in your living room rambling about random stuff, but his mind doesn't move. "So about Jisung, did you say yeah to helping him?" he asks, setting both of your plates down on the small table before grabbing two cushions off your couch n placing them on the floor, patting it for you to sit down next to him.

"Yeah, I agreed because I've only got a few more things to do n I'll be finished, I'd feel guilty for saying no, I can't let him just fail the entire course because I couldn't be bothered you know? If what you're worried about is that I won't have time for you, you're wrong, I'll still be seeing you on Tuesdays regardless." You reply in an your usual tone, giving Hyunjin a peck on the cheek as you thank him for the pasta before picking up your fork & taking a bite.

"Jisung.. Isn't someone you wanna try teach, It's a waste of your time, you should probably pass on the offer. You should help me! I'm sooo stuck on the power point." he responds, his voice monotone, trying to hide how pissed he actually is.

"Hyune, we both know you're not struggling, you only have like two more things to do so stop being silly, n besides, I get a few extra credits if I do it so it will be worth it." you say after swallowing a bite, looking at him & that's when you realise his body language, completely giving away the fact he is now in a sulk as he purses his lips at what you say, not verbally replying to you.

"Hyunjin, what's up with you, hmm? You were so happy when I got home, is something bothering you?" you ask him, putting your fork down. "It's just.. Jisung is just gonna try get in your pants y/n. I know what he's like, if he actually gave a fuck about this grade, he woulda tried way before now, he has a music career now so he doesn't even need college." he says, pointing his fork at you & swaying it around as he speaks, his voice serious despite him trying to sound unbothered.

You just look at Hyunjin, honestly confused on where this attitude has came from. "Just because he might have another career once he leaves, doesn't mean he doesn't wanna pass, Hyune. He won't 'get in my pants' I don't even know him or anything about him apart from what you've told me." a tinge of annoyance in your voice now, not at all liking what he has to say.

"Alright." he mumbles as he begins eating, not wanting to discuss it further so you ignore it, moving onto a different conversation, which makes his mood slightly better than it was before.

Hyunjin leaves an hour or so later, after helping you wash up & cuddling with you until you were dozing off. You give him a sheet of notes you had written earlier in that day just for him to help him with his own essays, changing the wording a whole bunch so he wouldn't accidentally write something similar to you have done, which he can't help but blush at the thoughtfulness. He leaves your apartment in the same mood when you first came home earlier on.

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You're walking to your morning class after grabbing a drink from the cafeteria when you hear someone calling your name from behind you over the music of your headphones, you turn around to see Jisung being the reason your name is being said, his dorky little smile looking back at you as he walks up to you.

"Hi y/n, in case you didn't know but I'm Jisung n I just wanna say thank you for helping me with all of this, means loads to me." he says, giving you an awkward chuckle as his hand rubs against the nape of his neck.

"Don't worry about it, just don't make it a waste of my time, I still need to do loads of my own stuff so I won't be waiting around for you." responding in a cold tone as you put your headphones on again before walking to your class.

You take your own unofficial seat & just go on your phone, not paying much attention to the things going on around you, blocking out the multiple conversations going on around you.

You look down to the right corner of the auditorium & notice Hyunjin isn't sitting in his own usual spot.

You; Where r u? u okay? Hyune<3: yea, just slept in lol, just take pics of what u write n i can use that, ill probs be in after break

You begin texting a response when the chair next to you is pulled out & someone sits beside you, you look to your left & Han is smiling at you, pulling his books out of his bag & placing them on the desk.

"Sir told me to come n sit beside you since he is helping yuna right now n he doesn't have time to re-explain it all to me. You still okay to help me, right?" He blurts out, looking at you with his boba eyes, you just nod your head & he smiles.

Jisung begins to show you where he's at on each part of the assessments he needs to do & shows you the very few notes he has actually been bothered to write down.

"You've only wrote this..? for an entire years worth of work this is all you have to help you?" yo snort as you hand back his notepad, your eyebrows raised. "I thought it wouldn't be this intense!" he responds, his voice whiney.

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You spend the next hour roughly explaining how to do the main parts of everything & you were writing down a few things for him since you realise he is a painfully slow writer, but you choose to hold your tongue since you think he is actually listening since he is actually asking you a question ever so often.

The time hits quarter past eleven so you grab your little blue money purse before standing up to leave for your break when Jisung moves his chair out so you can't leave. "Y/n, could I get your number or something? so I can text you.. about the work! of course." Han asks you as he stands up to face you fully.

"Awk yeah that would make sense, alright." you take one of your pens off the desk & open the cap before grabbing Jisungs hand before you write your number on it & then squeezing yourself past him, walking up the rest of the stairs to leave but he runs up to you again to begin walking with..well, behind you, ignoring his friends at the other end of the room shouting his name.

"Thanking you y/nnie, I can call you y/nnie right? anyways what's your plans for after college hours? Do you have a job you gotta get to? Any sorta clubs? I get the vibe you definitely are a part of... an art class. I woulda said book club but I feel as if that's too basi-" "You talk so much, holy shit. My plan is to finish what I need to finish tonight or tomorrow so I'll have time to actually help you" you cut off, rolling your eyes as you begin walking one of the common area benches, Jisung still trailing behind you.

You sit down & Jisung settles himself beside you, smiling at his friends whenever they walk past, talking your ear off as you just stare at him, not paying attention.

A minute later, You turn away from Jisung & lean your head against the wall in annoyance , Jisung now talking about how he lived in Malesia & almost got eaten by an alligator when your eyes scan the area & that's when you notice Hyunjin strolling towards you. You lean back upright & smile n wave at him & he smiles back, until Han pops his head out from behind you to see who you're waving at, your body no longer covering him from the way you're both sitting.

Hyunjin reaches you but doesn't sit down, instead standing in front of both of you. "Heya y/n, hi jisung, what you both talking about." Hyunjin says in a weird tone of voice, sounding slightly off standish. "Couldn't tell ya, sir didn't really go over anything new so I didn't write anything down to give you, he was just answering others questions, come sit." you say as you pat the spot beside you but he doesn't budge, feet staying glued to the floor, hi eyes moving to now look at the man sitting beside you.

"So if he was answering questions all day, why'd you not just ask him for help on what to do? Why are you putting more on y/ns plate?" Hyunjin spits to jisung, his facial expressions scarily neutral. "Because he would spend an entire day explaining it to me! I asked y/n a million times if it's fine n it's fine! y/n doesn't mind it." Han whines back, throwing his hands around & that's when Hyunjin notices your number drawn onto his hand.

Hyunjin looks at it then back at the both of you before scoffing. "Point is, you don't give a fuck about passing, I'm not stupid. I'll see you later." he speaks in the same cold tone, tapping your head condescendingly before walking away & down the hall out of sight.

"What the hell is his problem, he has such an attitude." you murur, mostly to yourself but Jisung responds anyway. "dunno, maybe stress." feigning innocence.

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Hyunjin walks into class, blood boiling. He sits on the opposite side than he usually does & puts his headphones on, basically throwing the items in his bag onto his desk before logging into his computer & pulling up his word document.

He doesn't look up at any of the noise around him, other students for some reason spending their break in the same room they've been sitting in for four hours now until someone taps his head before pulling his headphones off his head.

"Nice song, what's it called?" Lisa chimes as Hyunjin turns around, relaxing when he sees it's just her & not a random person trying to piss him off. "You're still on your essay? y/n handed hers in already, didn't your little girlfriend feel like helping you out?" she remarks, sitting on the edge of the desk, swinging her legs while she looks down at him.

"y/n.. isn't my 'girlfriend' so to speak n anyways, we both agreed to do it on our own since y/n concentrates better that way n i've learned that so do I, so if you could leave Lisa i'd like that." he responds, his tone sounding more rude than he intended.

"Who pissed in your cereal Hyunjin, jeez. That sucks, I'd love for you to help me, I'm further behind than I wanted to be, can I borrow your notes at least? & you sure y/n works better on her own? She was helping Jisungie a wholeeee bunch earlier." she speaks back, sweet toned, the smile not wiping off her face for even a second, picking up his notepad & flicking through it.

"Mhmm, just take it n give it back at the end of the day. I told y/n helping Jisung is a waste of time but sir n Jisung both wormed their way into her brain knowing she would feel too guilty for saying no, she didn't listen to me, she's too kind." he replies, not bothering to look up at Lisa despite feeling her eyes almost burning two holes into his side profile.

"Clearly not too kind if she can't listening to her own boyfriendddd" she teases, ruffling up his hair. "I told you, we aren't officially together, you taking my notes or no? I have stuff to do Lisa." he snarks as he finally actually looks up at her as she jumps off the desk, jotter in hand.

"I know, just wanted to hear you confirm the fact. I would ask you to send me the notes but you've blocked my number, y/n has you so bitched, didn't think I'd see the day." Hyunjin just rolls his eyes as Lisa says this but he sees you & Jisung walking back into the room, six or seven levels above & he gets an idea.

He rolls his chai out, blocking Lisas path as he looks up at her, a puzzled look on her face. "If you say please, I'll think about unblocking youuu." he taunts, his pretty smile showing on his face. Lisa looks up at you in your usual seat, noticing your quick glances down back at them, trying to not make it too obvious before looking back down at Hyunjin. "Pretty please, Jinnie?" she responds, battering her eyelashes as she ruffles his hair again.

He chuckles before moving out of the way, letting her past. As she leaves, he murmurs a 'next joke, fuck that' to himself, internally cringing at the conversation between them before pressing play on his spotify again & doing his work.

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The day finally ends & you are quick to get out of the room, not being surprised if steam was coming out of your ears with how pissed you are. You noticed Lisa & Hyunjin speaking & you were unable to concentrate from that moment on. 'Why was she touching him?' 'Why was he flirting with her?' 'what a fucking dick' keep bursting into your mind & you honestly want to punch them both in the face.

Hyunjin gets his notepad back from Lisa & walks away without saying much of anything to her, trying to catch up to someone in particular... Jisung.

He knows his schedule like the back of his hand & it doesn't take much walking or time to find him, sitting on a small ledge waiting for the main music room to be unlocked for him, Chris & Changbin, eating a packet of skittles, filling his chubby cheeks while just idly looking around.

"Heya Hyunjin, you alright?" He questions, pulling his legs closer to his chest so Hyunjin can sit down opposite him, which he does. "Been better, got a question for you though." he sighs, leaning forward to dig his hand into Jisungs packet & takes out a handful of skittles, dumping the green ones back into the packet.

"Go f'r it." he speaks, words muffled as he pours more into his mouth. "What you doing with y/n? I pretty much made it clear to stay away, so what is your problem? You coulda asked anyone to help you but I know you went to sir n specifically asked for y/n's help, you can't fool me I've known you too long." he questions, his voice sounding far too normal for it to be comfortable.

"You didn't tell me shit, n I'm not a toddler, what makes you think you can tell me what to do? You're not actually together together so why can't I simply speak to her?" he remarks, smirking at him knowing he is getting under his skin as he throws his empty food wrapper at the bin but missing, making him kiss his teeth.

Hyunjin scoffs at his words, in disbelief. "Han stop being a dick, y/n is mine n it's that simple so just fuck off, I've never told you to leave anyone fuck alone until now so just do it? It's not difficult believe it or not." Hyunjin snaps back, getting more annoyed as the clock ticks by, not bothering to keep his tone quiet as another student walks by every once in a while.

"Yea n we also agreed we wouldn't cockblock each other yet here you are, you guys aren't official which you said yourself so it's fair game. You can't claim someone if you're still flirting with your other little side pieces, me & y/n saw you n Lisa earlier. You seriously wanna get rid of everyone else you see for one person? Next joke." he replies, his voice raising at the end, honestly enjoying how pissed off Hyunjin is getting, his face getting more & more red.

"Lisa is literally nothing to me n yea-" Hyunjin is cut off as Changbin n Chan swivel around the corner, all smiles. "Heya Hyunjin, not seen you in ages, Jisung I got the key so we can go in now, you coming Hyun?" Chan questions as he turns his back to unlock the door.

"Nah, I'm busy n got things to do, I'll speak to you all later." Hyunjin replies, squishing Changbins cheeks playfully, trying to ease any tension the others are starting to sense, before walking off, his breathing intense as he leaves the building & pretty much speed walking home.

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He enters his complex building & storms up the multiple flights of stairs, skipping a step or two each time. He turns the corner & sees you sitting on his doormat, both of you making eye contact.

You stand up & wipe any dirt that could be on you as Hyunjin sighs, stopping in front of you as he moves one of his headphone speakers, not even bothering to fully pull them off.

"Are you gonna speak to me n tell me what's wrong with you Hyunjin?" You speak out, placing your hands on your hips. "Do you seriously not know what you've done? Give me a fucking break. Move, I want to get inside." he spits back before trying to worm his way around you but you stop him.

"Hyunjin what the fuck is your problem? I've done jack shit n yet you're treating me as if I'm an annoyance to you! I'm not leaving till I get an answer." you yell back, getting even more pissed at his attitude.

"I'm not even going to bother arguing with you, especially in my fucking hallway y/n, get inside." He spits out as he pushes your arm away & unlocks his door before entering, not bothering to shut it as he knows you're gonna end up following him.. which you do.

You shut his door behind you & chase behind him as he walks into his bedroom & throwing off his hoodie, not even acknowledging you as he does his usual routine.

"So you gonna explain or what? Also turn around when I speak to you, don't be so fucking rude Hyunjin." you utter, speaking to his back as he doesn't even bother looking at you.

"Got nothing to explain. You gonna tell me why you wrote your number on Jisungs arm when I specifically told you what he would be actually wanting from you & after telling you it would be a complete waste of time?" He scoffs, rolling his eyes as he turns around to look back at you, leaning on his desk.

You raise your eyebrows at him, not being able to hold back the shocked laugh at his words. "Are you being fucking serious? First of all Hyunjin, I'm not a kid that you can boss around n second of all, I only gave him my number so he can ask me about anything he needs & I'm basically finished everything I need to do for finals so I don't fucking care about helping your friend out a bit!" you yell back, your heart beginning to race.

"It's fucking obvious he was flirting with you y/n?! Are you really that naive to fucking see it? Sorry to be the one to tell you but it's true." he replies, swinging his arms around & pointing as he speaks.

"So fucking what if he was? It changes absolutely nothing since I'm not interested! But if you want to speak about flirting, you're a huge fucking hypocrite since you were basically drooling over Lisa earlier & you knew I was watching! Your attitude is disgusting & if you're acting like this when we aren't even official then what makes you think that is what I want? You're straight up immature." you shout, your voice going a bit raspy & your hands shaking.

"I did that because I was fucking hurt about what you were doing! & I know we aren't officially together but you haven't been acting as if you want to be with me! You don't even listen to me y/n when I know what the hell I'm talking about. I chosen you for me to actually try get into a relationship with but I'm thinking it's not worth it." he cries out, tears threatening to leave his eyes as he says this, shouting back at you.

"Are you trying to insinuate I'm 'lucky' to be in this position with you, get off your fucking high horse holy shit! I didn't flirt with Han at all but you can't say the same about you & Lisa, how am I supposed to trust you if you act like this over something so small? This isn't even fucking worth it Hyunjin, I'm not going to let you see me as if I'm beneath you." you respond, your voice going monotone at the end as you shake your head at him before turning around to leave, realising this conversation is getting nowhere.

Hyunjin is quick to step across his room & get between you & the bedroom door, blocking you from leaving. "When the hell did I say you're beneath me? Why can't you see how upset I am over all of this? I want to be with you in the future but you are just throwing it back in my fucking face? Do you just like the attention or something? Is that why you just straight up refused to listen to me?" he questions, looking right into your eyes with his own, his eyes being similar to how they looked when he came to your house & confessed to you not too long ago, but with anger mixed in along with them this time.

"You're fucking joking, right? What 'attention' am I getting other than you yelling in my face about it? Stop being such a jealous prick Hyunjin, the future isn't now so you don't have this 'claim' on me like you think you do, as much as I want it & how much you claim yo want to, we aren't fucking dating & you wanna know why I think you're trying to hold back? Is because you like the attention & you won't be able to fuck anyone else without it being considered cheating! Come back to me when you can sort your jealousy & other issues out." You scream at him, a tear or two falling down your cheeks but you're quick to wipe them away, not looking right at him as you speak.

Hyunjin cackles at our words before yet again stopping you from being able to leave, putting his hand on the door handle. "You speak so much stuff that you're convinced you know all about but you couldn't be so wrong it's honestly a joke. I don't want anyone else but you & I've made it so clear since the start, You expect me to not be jealous when someone is fawning over you.. what's mine? Acting as if your blood doesn't boil when anyone flirts with me? You being so pissed about Lisa is a prime example. Stop acting like you're any better than me, that you're not just as possessive over me, you just don't wanna seem like a psycho about it." He replies, his tone still full of venom but no longer yelling at you, tonguing his cheek.

"Why wouldn't I be jealous? I'm clearly threatened by all the girls who drool over you, even more so because I'm not similar to those girls, I'm not as confident or straight up ballsy as them! But the way you've gone about everything is so wrong Hyunjin." You cry, voice lowering to match his but the tears not fully stopping & he takes his finger to wipe them away, pouting.

"I'd be lying if I said you admitting you're jealous isn't hot, but stop fucking worrying, I wouldn't give you the time of day if I wasn't one hundred percent sure. Stop crying too, you don't need to. But being for real, y/n, sto-" He is cut off as your phone begins ringing in the back pocket of your jeans & Hyunjins arm is quick to swing around & pull it out before reading the nameless number, Hyunjin hands it to you with his eyebrows raised, already knowing who it is.

You answer the phone & It's obviously Jisung, who doesn't even give you time to say anything before asking you a whole bunch of questions, saying he is 'stuck' on what to do.

As Jisung speaks, Hyunjin taps the 'speaker' button before ushering you towards his bed, his smirk not leaving his face. You look up at him with confused eyes as the back of your knees hit the bed, making you sit on it before Hyunjin pushes on your shoulder so you're laying fully down, your feet still on the floor of his room before getting on top of you & moving your head to the side before nuzzling his face in your neck, beginning to nibble at it, making you tense up beneath him & your breath hitches.

"Jisung can I call you ba-" You're cut off by Hyunjin nibbling down on your neck as he mumbles a 'nuh uh' & your hand reaches up to pull on Hyunjins hair & he does his best to hold back a groan, his hand slithering down to your jeans, unbuttoning the button after around thirty seconds of trying & then using his hand & legs to push them down just far enough for acccess.

He begins to allow his finger to graze over the outside of your pussy, feeling the fabric of your panties, not failing to feel over the small wet patch now visible as he sucks a dark purple hickey into the crook of your neck & your eyes scrunch together as you bite your lip, trying to not make a sound.

"I did the first two paragraphs but I'm stuck on what quotes to use, I think the ones I've chosen are too short to keep writing about, what quotes did you choose?" Han questions on the other end of the phone but you're barely paying attention as the man above you now wriggles his fingers under your panties, now drawing small circles on your clit, making you gasp.

"You can't use t-the same quotes I use J-jisung, read what you've chose o-out to me." you stutter out, hips grinding against Hyunjins fingers as best as you can with the position you're in.

Jisung begins to read out his quotes & Hyunjin can't help but let out a small chuckle, half at how hard Han is trying but the other half being at how hard you're trying to remain coherent, so he steps up his actions. He cups your pussy before dragging his hand down to your dripping hole & entering two fingers in, a small squelch being heard & your legs tense up even more as you melt into his lips, still suckling hickey after hickey into your neck.

"Y/n? Am I breaking up? We can meet up if you want & you can go over it, I know a café we can meet at if you're free?" He requests & Hyunjin breaks away from you neck to reply for you. "y/n is busy, figure it out." he remarks as he hangs up before turning your phone off & tossing it to the side.

"Didn't know you're into that, y/nnie, you're so wet just from a few touches? So dirty." he remarks, smirking at you before locking his lips with yours, his tongue tasting your own before he even gives you time to respond & you bring your hands to cup his cheeks.

His fingers begin to hit against your G-spot as he uses a 'come here' motion as his thumb begins to rub your clit from side to side, making you whine into his mouth, making him smirk.

You move your arm down, dragging your nails down the front of him & over his abs over his shirt before beginning to palm his cock over his joggers, making his hips jerk forward before changing your position by rolling himself onto the bed & pulling you so you're straddling him, his fingers leaving your cunt as he does so, making you whince.

You begin grinding over his covered hard on after kicking your jeans fully off, you being left in just your shirt & panties. "Maybe you're the dirty one Hyune, can't resist touching me while your friend is on the phone hmm?" You finally have the chance to reply & Hyunjin chuckles as his hands come down to your ass, fondling the skin. "Oh but I can resist, but why would I when it's funny to hear him try ask you out while disguising it as 'studying' while you're at my house currently half naked?" he replies instantly, biting his lip as your wetness is now soaking through your panties & leaving a small spot on his clothes, staining them.

You roll your eyes before you pull his shirt off his body, messing up his hair a bit before you slither yourself off the bed & onto his carpeted floor & tugging on his joggers, his hips raising to help you remove them, leaving him in only his underwear.

"You're being bold for someone who couldn't take more than a quarter of my cock last time you sucked it, you trying to train yourself for Jisung?" he teases, resting his bodyweight on his elbows, looking down at you as you pull his hardened cock out, pumping it slowly in your hand.

"Maybe I just didn't want to take any more seeing since I have no idea where it's been." you spit back, looking up at him as you smirk, your bottom lip in between your teeth as you let a glob of spit escape your lips & fall onto his pretty pink tip. He opens his mouth to respond but you cut his words out of his chest by licking a long strip from just above his base to his tip before letting the tip fall past your lips, suckling on it softly, making him hiss.

You let your tongue swirl against his tip before you begin dipping your head lower, allowing your mouth to take part of his shaft in your mouth too. You are still a bit nervous since it's only your second time sucking cock but Hyunjins words fuel you to prove to him you can take it all, so as he is taking a deep breath out, hand holding your hair out of your face, you force your head down further so over half of his cock is now in your mouth & you hollow your cheeks, making his toes curl & have to consciously try not jerk his hips into your mouth.

"You been practicing y/n? Doing so well, taking it so g-good, so pretty." he groans, lightly slapping your cheeks, feeling his cock through the skin of your cheek, giving him butterflies.

You begin to bob your head up & down his cock as you use your hand to jerk him off in the same rhythm, making his grip in your hair tighter as his groans & hisses get more frequent, making you convinced you're probably leaking your own wetness onto the floor you're situated on.

You let yourself off his cock to catch a breath as you let all the spit that's formed in your mouth get dribbled back onto his cock if it hasn't already fell past your lips & you look up at him with glossy eyes as you pump him at a faster pace, his cheeks blown out & now breathing out his mouth.

"Only practice I've gotten is off the pretty boy I'm looking at right now." you chuckle, honestly having no idea where the confidence is coming from before you blow cold air onto his tip, making him yelp & scrunch his eyes shut before leaning forward to pull you back onto the bed.

"I refuse to cum before fucking you" he mumbles, out of breath as he kisses you again, full of tongue. "Open your mouth." he hushes as he breaks away from your lips, fingers playing with your folds over your panties again, his wet cock against your thigh.

You do as he says & he spits into your mouth, humming as you swallow it, nothing but lust in both of your eyes. "Such a slut deep down, aren't you? You want more? Your hips can't fucking stay still." he chuckles, biting his lip as he looks down at the sight below, your lower half squirming to try get more friction & you just whine.

"Hyune.. Please give me it, don't I deserve it?" You question, seduction tinging your voice & Hyunjin can't stop the feeling of his cheeks & ears going hot, the way you're currently talking making his head spin.

He stands up & pulls you towards the edge of the bed, still laying on your back as he peels off your soiled underwear, your pussy glistening & his mouth waters, deciding to spit right onto your clit, making you whine.

He pushes your legs that little bit further apart before situating himself between them, jerking himself slowly while looking down at you. "How bad do you want it, hmm? tell me how much you want it, pretty." he speaks, not looking away from your pretty face as he hits his tip against your clit, making a tiny, sticky slapping noise. "Hyune I deserve it, want it so much, don't I? Look how wet I am for you." you whine, fingers trailing down to spread your lips, exposing your hole to him.

Hyunjin groans at the action , his cock twitching as he aligns himself up with your entrance. "Say it one more time, didn't quite hear you." he replies, hand caressing the inside of your thigh as he drags his cock up & down your folds. "Hyunjin please just put it in! I need it s-" Your cries are cut off as he pushes his tip past your hole & sheaves into you until his pretty, full & heavy balls are against your skin, making you gasp.

"You're so tight, Jisung not fucking you right?" He asks, trying to sound calm & collected when in reality he is trying to not cum on the spot, your warm, wet walls wrapping around his dick perfectly. "t-stop winding me up hyune, please move." you whine in response, making Hyunjin smirk as he retracts his hips before thrusting back into you, knocking the air out of your lungs.

He sets a slow but powerful pace, small squelching noises & both of your whines & grunts filling not only his bedroom but the entire apartment. "For someone wh-who's such a fu-fuckboy, you're not fucking me l-like one." You struggle but get the words out, wanting to give him a taste of his own medicine & it works as he grunts before pushing the backs of your thighs up against your chest before beginning to pound into you, making you squeal.

"You wanna try repeat that for me, hmm? You're saying that as if anyone can fuck you like this but me, your cunt is mine, can't your brain understand that or are you just too much of a whore to only want one dick?" He snaps at you, his hair sticking to his forehead because of the sweat as he abuses your cunt, his thumb reaching down to your cunt, making you yelp & your hips begin meeting his thrusts halfway.

You shake your head but he isn't happy with that response & he grabs your face by the cheeks, forcing you to look up at him as he leans forward. "Words, y/n, where did your boldness go, hmm? Who's pussy is this? Tell m-me." He asks, breath quick & short as he doesn't slow down for even a second, letting out a hiss as you reach up to his back & digging your nails into him on accident, for sure leaving marks later but none of you bothering to care.

"Y-y-yours! Hyun-jin I'ma c-cum." you screech, brain going completely blank, your body almost exploding with sensation. Hyunjin smirks at you before standing upright again, continuing his assault on your swollen cunt. "Cum for me then, show me how good I-I make you feel, Only I can do this for you, can't I? Only I know how to m-make you feel so good, you look so beautiful under me, you need to see." he groans back at you, throwing his head back momentarily before looking back down at you as you cum around his cock, wriggling & squirming as it washes over you, your knuckles going white from the grip you have on his bedsheets.

He fucks you through your orgasm, leaving you breathless before he pulls out. You don't have much time to question it however as he pulls out of you & grabbing your phone off the floor before returning to you.

"Gonna show you how fucking hot you look, It's on your phone so it's just for your eyes, no stress." He says, breathless as he turns on the video option before pressing record & sliding himself back into you, your orgasm forming a white ring around his base.

You clench around his thick cock, partly from overstimulation as he begins pumping into you again, chasing his own release now. The camera is pointed at you so you decide to act up a little, pulling your shirt above your tits, exposing your hardened buds to the camera & cold air of the room, making Hyunjin whine. "Look how beautiful you are y/n, you're anything & everything I could e-ever fucking want, taking me so well, I've t-trained you to take my c-cock so well." he says in a husky voice, his throat now dry as he continues ogling you, looking down at your swollen, reddened pussy, dragging the phone down to let the screen get a good look too, watching it tense & clench around him, making his knees almost buckle.

His eyes widen as your fingers move up to your pretty tits as you begin playing with your own nipples, tugging & pulling on them before raising your fingers to Hyunjins lips & he gladly suckles on them, moaning onto them before you pull them out of his mouth & caress your now spit covered nipples softly.

"You like the c-camera, beautiful? You-you're so dirty, so p-perfect for me. Turn your pretty face to the side, show the camera w-what you let me do to you y/nnie" He groans, his voice high pitched & squeaky & you do as he says instantly, not fully processing what he meant or said as he move the camera upwards, showing the purple marks he has inprinted on your skin.

"G-gonna cum y/n." he forces the words out & before you even realise, you're wrapping your legs around his waist & pulling him towards you. He tosses the phone to the side again before falling onto his elbows on each side of your head & you use the rest of your strength to tilt your head up enough to connect your lip to his neck & you begin pinching the skin of his neck with your teeth & you suck a big purplish red mark into his neck as his own orgasm washes over him.

He melts into your skin as his orgasm fills you, coating your walls & giving you goose bumps. You let him fully lay on you as you softly kiss his neck & earlobe, letting him catch his breath back as you also try relax your own breathing.

You lay like this for a minute or two in complete silence as you now begin playing with Hyunjins wet hair, before tears start leaving your eyes. You begin to sniffle & Hyunjins brain switches itself back on as he pushes his head up from your neck to look at you, now crying.

"Y/nnie, why are you crying? Did I hurt you?" He begins to panic as he moves off of you to start checking you but you sit up too, basically following him as you wrap your arms around him, pulling him back down to you.

"Just stay here f'r a bit, Hyune I'm sorry, I didn't know how upset I would make you." you sniffle, not looking right at him as he looks at your reddened face, his heart hurting. "I'm sorry too, I don't want you to feel insecure, I was being stupid. Can we.. go on a proper date? I know it's not the most romantic time or place to ask but I was n still am serious about only wanting you y/n, I mean it, pinkie swear." He asks you in a soft voice & he holds out his pinkie to you & you can't help but let out a small giggle as you interlock them together then kissing your thumbs before locking in the promise.

"Took you long enough to fucking ask me." You reply as you wipe the tears off your cheeks, reaching up to kiss Hyunjin on the cheek & his already red cheeks get an even darker shade.

"Better late than never, Stay here n I'm gonna get us a drink n we can go for a bath." He kisses your forehead before getting off of you but he takes the time to shuffle you up to his pillows & laying your head on it as he grabs his bed throw & lays you under it so you're not just sitting there, before leaving the room dancing & singing.

"Y/n & Hyunjin sitting in a tree" He sings out loud as he walks around his house & you can't help but laugh. "Stop singing that or I'll change my mind!" You yell & he shuts up instantly (not including the whine of protest he yells back), making you laugh to yourself.

I'm not completely sure I want to do a fourth part to this so in case this is actually the finale, I really hope everyone who has taken the time to read it has enjoyed reading the past 3 parts as much as I enjoyed writing them & thank you for all the kind words! <3

TAGS: @tsunderelino @troublemaker02 @ismokeeweed @lmhcats @isagerada

[lokilysolbitch]

wait okay so. if you stop viewing adhd as a focus issue and frame it as a internal dopamine functions aren't working issue. and if you need dopamine to do things. then. instead of thinking how can i make myself focus. you can just think how do i get external dopamine sources to make my brain machine go.

im not focusing because im not getting my internal reward im biologically supposed to get. that's why im unmotivated. i brush my teeth and i get no internal sense of satisfaction. so now i don't want to brush my teeth. if i'm not getting an internal sense of satisfaction for doing things then most tasks feel worthless. which can look like or turn into depression.

but then i find one source or one task with a bunch of dopamine like a certain fidget or hobby (recently it's been diamond painting for me) and suddenly im fine again because my brain is no longer starving. suddenly i can focus on my lectures playing in the background when im getting little hits of external dopamine from putting diamonds in the right spot. im getting the sense of satisfaction that everyone else was already getting.

or like. one day im trying to read a textbook and the words are just. not getting into my brain. so i give up and play genshin for a bit. i get dopamine in my brain. i turn back to the textbook. and suddenly. i can read again. i read for a few minutes and i'm not comprehending it anymore. i play genshin for a few minutes and then turn back to the textbook. and then i can read again. again.

people have already been saying this but it really clicked yesterday when i was trying to read a textbook for a class i love bc it's connected to a special interest but i didn't like the current chapter topic. so i wasn't getting any dopamine from the content. and of course i wasn't getting any dopamine from the act of completing the task of reading. and i was trying to think of ways i needed to multitask to focus. but i noticed i kept switching from tiktok to reading which helped. like id watch some tiktoks and there would be like a mental feeling of "okay we're at 100%" and is just toss my phone and start reading. like i didn't have to tear myself away from it.

i was literally feeding my brain. and just stopped once i got full. like putting gas in the car.

that's why i only use things if they have pretty colors or some sort of pleasing sensory input. that's where my dopamines coming from. that's why a sticker chart and playing music while brushing my teeth helped so much. to give me the sense of satisfaction i wasn't getting from my own brain.

that's why giving myself the rewards at the end of tasks didn't always work. you can't reward a car with gas if the tank is empty. i needed the dopamine to start the tasks, and more dopamine intermittently to continue longer tasks.

anyways. i'm gonna stop holding off from doing fun shit until after i finish tasks. bc in hindsight i always did better work when i put the fun stuff first. and i'm gonna stop wasting time waiting for my brain car to go when the tank was empty the whole time.

i left mid post for a little bit and came back and i didn't proofread this and it's also unfinished but i'm posting it now bc. i have DID i don't member exactly what i was tryna say. and personally i'm not reading all that.

TLDR: stop treating adhd like it's mainly a focus issue. treat it like dopamine is an external resource and it acts as gas for your brain car. how can i focus better❌ what satisfying thing can i do to help my brain initiate/focus on this task✅

[grandline-fics]

hi! i just read all of your oneshots and they’re perfect, i’m in love. hoping it is okay to request something with zoro having a soft spot towards reader? he doesn’t even realize it a first, but since reader is somehow quiet and gentle (not weak though!) he starts to take note of small things to do/don’t do or notice their actions (ex: taking care o the crew) a lot more than others. thank you. <3

DESCRIPTION: Who knew you were Zoro’s soft spot? Apparently both of you are the last to know 

WARNINGS: none, just pure fluff

CHARACTERS: Zoro

WORDS: 856

A/N:  Thank you for your kind words and for this request! I hope it's to your liking. I've been feeling a little under the weather these past couple of days so some fluff was needed <3

MASTERLIST

*REQUESTS ARE OPEN*

It’s tiny things; little, practically meaningless things that are so easy to miss but they’re there. When you first joined the crew, your presence fell into the likes of his and Robin’s; strong but relatively quiet and easily looked passed if you wanted. You didn’t see the point in wasting energy needlessly and knew the value in waiting until letting yourself be known. Zoro unknowingly enjoyed that kind of calm you naturally brought and found himself gravitating towards it because it seemed even when he was in his own space you were still in his eye-line. In the beginning he found it a little strange that it kept happening, he knew you weren’t following him. Hell most of the times you were on the other side of the ship or talking with someone else so he cleared it as coincidence and thought nothing of it. As time went on, there was a lot he was putting down to mere coincidence. 

When you were all exploring new islands it was purely happenstance that you two walked side by side. Neither of you were the type to bound about and race ahead without a cause for urgency. He found he didn’t get lost as easily when you were close. You always seemed to know the way to go. On one trip Brook had commented to Zoro how lucky he had been that you were there to talk to him at the right moment otherwise he would have kept walking towards a path that would have taken him towards a ravine. Because of your voice suddenly pulling him into conversation he’d kept the right track and avoided possibly injuring himself and getting a lecture from the others. Lucky right?

It was also luck of the draw that when eating or drinking off the ship, Zoro was sat at the table in such a way that his back blocked you mostly from view from any unwanted stares. It was never in a subconscious way to keep you from interacting with others but it was like another sense he had that he was able to tell when you just wanted to sit with the crew and enjoy your meal. It seemed to go both ways too in that regard. If women tried to approach and flirt with him you effortlessly had a way of making a joke to dissuade them and steer them in Sanji’s direction. Was any of it done out of jealousy, possessiveness of the other’s attention, or an overwhelming need to protect? Not in the least, it was just doing what needed to be done to help out a friend and fellow crew-mate.

On the Sunny it’s no different. It’s not even a second thought, his body just reacts without thinking. In the early, barely waking hours when he’s finished his night watch and is about to grab a quick snack before training he always pulls out a specific mug from the cabinet and sets it on the counter. It’s never for him and like clockwork you appear just as he’s finished drinking a glass of water. Rubbing the sleep from your eyes and stifling a small yawn you always offer him a small smile and greeting that is returned. You both pass each other, your only motivation is caffeine to see you through the last of the watch before everyone else is awake while he goes to the crow’s nest to train. 

After all this time it’s never occurred to you to question why your mug is waiting for you when you rise. You don’t know why but it’s something that immediately makes your morning a little bit brighter. It’s also routine now that an hour or so after breakfast, you and Zoro both nap; him to rest between his training sessions and you to grab another couple hours after your night watch. Nami occasionally glances up from her charts to shake her head at your sleeping forms. Robin finds it adorable while Brook chuckles, nostalgic over youth and love’s first stages. 

“Jeez they’re both so clueless.” Sanji grumbles, he’s accepted long ago that he doesn’t have a chance with you but is so infuriated that nothing has actually happened. He lost you to the swordsman who hasn’t even thought to make a move. Usopp grins and watches as you stir slightly in your sleep which in turn makes Zoro react before his body relaxes again. Currently he’s lying on his back with one hand tucked behind his head. While the other that’s draped over his chest, his fingers almost touching yours that are curled by your head as you sleep on your side. 

From his spot on Sunny’s head, Luffy grins. “I don’t know. I think they do know, in their own way.” It’s the little, insignificant things that you both do for each other that are easy to miss and while a lot of little things add up into something bigger, none of it compares to the way that you and Zoro unknowingly look at each other at any given chance. Because that is something so big that no one else can ignore. 

[taeyongdoyoung]

end of beginning

summary: your perfectionist self can't settle and wants to improve your grades. no matter the cost... pairing: johnny x reader genre: smut warnings: professor/student dynamic, age gap (unspecified), dubcon, power play, neck-kissing, biting, spanking, fingering, slight dumbification, size kink (duh), unprotected sex, creampie, forbidden relationship, pet names (angel, baby, sweetheart) word count: 1.5k

You have never felt so foolish as you do now, standing outside of your professor’s cabinet, waiting for his office hours to start. This isn’t like you at all. You are usually at the top of each class, amazing students and teachers alike with your well-written assignments and outstanding participation in the discussions. You are usually the one that professors praise.

To say you feel embarrassed would be an understatement. You are not used to this, asking for help, admitting that you are falling behind, that your grades have never been worse. But if you want to graduate successfully, you have to swallow your pride and face the problem head on.

You don’t know what it is about Professor Suh’s lectures but you just can’t seem to focus. You try to take detailed notes as you do in your other classes, but you end up getting so lost in his beautiful voice, staring at his pretty face and thinking about his big hands as they flick through the pages that your notes end up being messy, incoherent and awfully inaccurate.

You have tried different strategies such as asking other students for their notes but nothing seems to work. So, in your desperation, you end up here, waiting for Professor Suh to put you out of your misery. You hope that no one else shows up during office hours ‘cause it would be too mortifying if other students find out and start making fun of you for being so behind on the material.

“Oh, Y/N!” Professor Suh exclaims in surprise as he unlocks the door to his cabinet, letting you in. “How long have you been waiting? Usually no one comes to these office hours so I’m a bit late. You should have emailed me.”

You stand nervously, your fingers digging into the tender skin of your already sweaty palms.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t realize…” you start to explain.

“No, you don’t have to apologize, it’s just unusual. Take a seat, make yourself comfortable,” he tries to reassure you in his calming voice.

You take off your bag, putting it on the ground and sit in the chair against his. God, you feel so stupid…

“So, what brings you here?” Professor Suh asks.

“You’ve probably noticed but my grades have been plummeting,” you murmur awkwardly.

“Well, if that’s what you call a couple of B’s, then sure, I guess,” he laughs softly.

“You don’t understand…I know other students may be happy with such grades but this is unusual for me.”

Professor Suh looks at you over his glasses in disbelief.

“You do realize that in real life nobody cares about grades, yes?”

“You’re right. I’m sorry I’ve wasted your time,” you reach to grab your bag but he stops you.

“I didn’t say that I wasn’t going to help you.”

You exhale in relief.

“What is troubling you the most? Is it the material?”

“I don’t know…It doesn’t make sense because I love literature, it’s always come easy to me. I just have a hard time focusing during your lectures, for some reason.”

“Must be my fault, then,” Professor Suh smiles knowingly. “My teaching method isn’t engaging enough.”

“N-no, that’s not what I m-meant,” you stammer nervously. “I’m just…easily distracted, I guess.”

“Oh? Are you like that in your other classes, as well?”

“Not really, no,” you admit, feeling even more embarrassed.

“See? Then I guess I need to improve. Find a way to help you focus,” Professor Suh insists.

“Please help me. I really don’t want to fail your class, it’s very important to me.”

“Is it important to you because you care about your grades or because you don’t want to let me down?” Professor Suh asks staring into your eyes.

The question is so direct that it takes you off guard. You want to look away but you are so captivated you don’t dare to blink.

“I…don’t want to disappoint you, Professor Suh,” you confess. “Your lectures are very engaging and I enjoy listening to them.”

“Do you enjoy the content or the sound of my voice?”

“Professor…” you break eye contact and you are far too gone to think clearly. What is this man doing to you?

Suddenly, he stands up in all his glory, walks to your chair and lifts your chin up with his finger.

“Answer the question.”

“What…what was the question again?” you ask dumbly.

He shakes his head in disapproval.

“Just as I feared. Helping you focus would be quite difficult.”

“I’m s-sorry, I’ll try harder.”

“You better.”

Grabbing a book from his desk, he opens it and puts it in front of you.

“Read. Out loud. Don’t stop unless I tell you to, understood?”

You nod eagerly and start reading.

“We like to think of the old-fashioned American classics as children’s books. Just childishness, on our part.”

Professor Suh starts playing with your hair gently, surprising you but you don’t dare to stop and continue reading to the best of your abilities.

“The world fears the new experience more than it fears anything.”

He is kissing your neck, biting even, eliciting soft moans out of you. How is that going to help you focus?! You feel like your brain is no longer working.

“Keep reading,” he reminds you.

“Cutting away the old emotions and consciousness. Don’t ask what is left.”

Professor Suh makes you stand up and then pushes you down abruptly so that your breasts and tummy are lying on the desk and your ass is up in the air.

“And you can please yourself, when you read the Scarlet Letter, whether you accept what that sugary, blue-eyed little darling of a Hawthorne has to say for himself-” you continue to read, voice shaky and lacking any confidence.

He lifts your skirt up, touching you in all the right places in all the wrong ways. You are so terrified of what is happening but you are even more terrified of stopping to read.

Professor Suh spanks your ass harshly the second you pause briefly.

“N-no, it h-hurts,” you cry out.

“Read,” he orders you and you have no choice but to obey.

“They didn’t come for freedom. Or if they did, they sadly went back on themselves.”

Professor Suh takes your panties off and slides his fingers inside your pussy easily, as you are embarrassingly wet. He assaults you vigorously, expecting you to keep reading.

“They came largerly to get away. In the long run, away from themselves.”

“You skipped a few sentences.”

Damnit, how did he catch that?

You go back to the parts you missed but your reading continues to be full of mistakes. Eventually, Professor Suh grows tired of that and takes the book away from you.

“I’m not sure this method is helpful,” he sighs and starts unbuckling his belt. “Might have to find another way for you to acquire knowledge.”

“S-sir?” your voice trembles, though you already anticipate what is coming.

“Stuff you full of it,” he explains calmly and enters you from behind.

You want to scream but you are so afraid of someone hearing that you bite your hand.

Professor Suh seems to notice your concerns, moves your hand away and presses his own against your mouth.

“Shhh, it’s okay, angel, I’m not going to hurt you,” he whispers gently while doing the opposite of what he’s saying.

He is so big that you feel as if he’s splitting you in half. Miraculously, you are still alive.

“You’re not good at focusing in my lectures anyway so I might as well give you something to remember during them,” he laughs. Oh, he’s so mean. You deserve it, though. For being so greedy. Not satisfied with a B. Stupid girl.

He removes his hand from your lips, trusting you not to make any loud noises.

“Do you want me to stop?”

Why ask now? He’s already gone this far…

“N-no, p-please,” you whimper helplessly.

“No as in stop or no as in keep going?”

You genuinely don’t know what the right answer is. If this is a test, then you’re surely failing.

Apparently, Professor Suh does not care what you have to say. Perhaps it’s your fault for being so slow…He keeps fucking you, going deeper inside of you than any man has ever been. Soon enough, he paints your walls white as if he’s an artist and not a literature professor.

You feel so dizzy, so brainless, so silly.

“Are you alive?” he asks, scooping you up into his big arms.

“N-no?” your response comes out with a questioning tone.

“Take all the time you need to recover,” he tells you thoughtfully.

“Can I ask you something, Professor Suh?”

“You should call me Johnny when we’re alone.”

“Oh, um…Johnny, what if someone had walked in?” you ask fearfully.

“Relax, sweetheart, I locked the door,” he laughs gently.

“Ah, that’s good.”

“Anything else you’re worried about?” Johnny plays with your breasts lazily as you sit in his lap.

“Um, yeah…”

“I’ll write you all A’s from now on if that’s what…”

“I don’t care about that anymore,” you confess teary-eyed. “Was this a one time thing for you, Johnny? Will I have to pretend nothing happened during your lectures?”

He caresses your hair just like how he did when this all started. For some reason, it doesn’t feel like the end.

“Oh, baby, this is just the beginning.”

The End

[inbabylontheywept]

Kevin vs. Quantum Mechanics

This is an autobiographical piece. Names have been changed for anonymity, but it's otherwise left be. ---

The class's first suspicion of Kevin was that he had, somehow, cheated his way up to this course. He just seemed perpetually confused, and strangely antagonistic of the professor. The weirdest example of this was when he asked what an ion was (in a third year EE class?), and was informed that it referred to any positively or negatively charged particle. It would have been strange enough to ask, but his reply of "Either? That doesn't sound right" sealed him in as a well known character in the class of 19 people.

The real tipping point in our perception of him during a lecture where the professor mentioned practical uses for a neutron beam, and Kevin asked if a beam could be made out of some other neutral material. When asked "Like what?", he replied "An atom with all of its electrons removed." When we pointed out that the protons would make that abomination extremely positively charged, he just replied with "So what if we removed those too?" and then was baffled when we informed him that would just be neutrons.

That's high school level chemistry. Not knowing it was so incredibly strange that I felt like something was off, so I asked him if he'd like to grab lunch. He accepted, we chatted, and I finally began to get a sense of his origin story.

See, Kevin wasn't a junior/senior electrical engineer like the rest of us. Kevin was, in fact, three notable things: A business major, a sophomore, and a hardcore Catholic. All three of those are essential to understanding his scenario.

What had begun all of this was actually a conflict with Kevin and his roommate. Kevin frequently had his fundamental belief in Absolute Good, Absolute Bad, and Absolute Anything pushed back on by his roommate, who was in STEM. Said roommate kept invoking quantum mechanics as his proof against Absolute Knowledge. Kevin was tired of having something that he didn't understand thrown at his convictions, so he decided to take a quantum course to settle things once and for all.

Despite not having any of the pre-reqs.

He'd actually tried to take quantum for physicists first, but the school's physics department wouldn't let him. It's actually pretty strictly regulated, because it is a mandatory class for physics majors. However, because quantum is not mandatory for electrical engineers, there aren't really any built in requirements for the class. It's just assumed that nobody would actually try to take it until their third year because doing so would the be the mental equivalent to slamming your nuts in the car door. Just, pure suffering for no good reason.

Apparently, the counselors had tried to talk him out of it, but if Kevin was one thing, it was stubborn. He'd actually had to sign some papers basically saying "I was warned that this is incredibly stupid, but I refused to listen" in order to take the class.

He was actually pretty nice, if currently unaware of how bad he'd just fucked up. I paid for the lunch, wished him the best, and reported back to the class discord. We'd all been curious about this guy's story, but now that I had the truth, I could share it with the world.

Feelings were mixed. Some people thought he was going to drop out any minute now. Others thought that he wouldn't, be also that convincing him to drop now, while he still could, was the only ethical thing. Others figured that a policy of non-interference was best: The counselors couldn't dissuade him, and if we tried to do the same, he'd probably just think it was STEM elitism trying to guard its little clubhouse. He'd figure out how hard things were, or he'd fail. Either way, it would help him learn more about the world.

We wound up taking the approach of non-interference. If nothing else, understanding his origins gave us more patience when he asked bizarre questions. He wasn't trying to waste our time, he was just trying to cram three years of pre-reqs into a one semester course. He did get a little bit combative sometimes, and we could tell that he was really wracking his brain to try and find some sort of contradiction or error that he could use to bring the whole thing down, but he never could.

First test came by, and he bombed it. Completely unprepared. He'd taken Calc I, but he didn't know how to do integrals yet (that was Calc II). Worse, he was far past the drop date. I imagine most people in his shoes would've stopped struggling. They'd realize they were fucked and just let themselves fail, at least salvaging their other classes grades in the process. Why waste resources on an unwinnable battle?

Kevin never asked questions like that. If he was stupid enough to try it, he was stupid enough to finish it. God bless him.

He invited me to lunch after the test and said that the class was more fascinating than he'd ever imagined, but he didn't know if he'd be able to pass it. He asked if I could help, and I said...maybe. I brought the request to the discord, and from the eight people there I got three volunteers who admired this dork's tenacity. He was in over his head, miles beneath the surface, but his fighting spirit was fucking glorious. If he was willing to go down swinging, we were willing to bust our asses trying to get him caught up.

Some of the stuff was just extra homework we gave to the guy. We told him he needed to learn integrals, stat. We sent him some copies of basic software that can be used to teach the basics of linear circuit equations, and he practiced that game like it was HALO. Just, hours sunk into it. Absolutely godlike.

He was still scrabbling for air at just the surface level of the class, but he'd gone from abysmal failure to lingering on the boundary between life and death. Other people in the class started to learn about Kevin's origin story, and our little circle of four volunteer tutors grew to six. Every day, he had someone trying to help him either catch up in some way, or finish that week's homework. He'd gone from being seen as a nuisance that wasted class time to the underdog mascot.

He was getting twelve hours of personal tutoring a week, on top of three hours of classes, on top of six hours of office hours, on top of the coursework. I don't think it's an exaggeration to say that this kid was doing 40 hours a week just trying to pass this one single class.

Second test comes around and he gets a 60. He's ecstatic. We're ecstatic. Kid's too young to take out drinking so we just order a pizza and cheer like he just won gold at the Olympics.

After that second test, things hit another tipping point. With so much catch-up under his belt, he was able to focus a lot more on the actual material for the class. A borderline cinematic moment happened when I was trying to get ahead on the homework so that I could put more hours in on my senior project. Nobody else had finished it yet because it wasn't due for another week, so the specifics of the problem I was working on were still a mystery. I went to the professor's office hours and get some pointers, but he wasn't willing to give good hints when the HW wasn't due for another week or so. He said I still had time to think about it, which was true, but I wanted to be able to think about other things. Kevin had watched the whole conversation, waiting for his turn to ask the professor more simple questions, but when I left I got a text from him telling me to hop on zoom.

Kevin had finished it earlier, because Kevin started all of his homework the moment it was assigned. He needed to, in order to make sure that he could get it done on time. He'd finished it the day before, and was able to walk me through it.

From student, to teacher. I'm not exaggerating when I say that he probably saved me eight hours on that assignment. I could've kissed him.

A month or two later, we took the final. As soon as we were done, we six asked Kevin how he did. He was nervous, there was so much new material for him in this class that his retention hadn't been great. Us six were also a little stressed: We were going to pass the class, but the final was hard.

We waited for the results.

And waited. And waited.

Finally, the scores were posted as a table, curve included. From our class of 19 people, 4 withdrew within the deadline, 4 failed, 1 got a C, 8 got B's, and 2 got A's. We could see that the curve for a C was set at 59.2% overall.

We called Kevin. He was crying. End score, 59.2%. Teacher curved the C exactly to his score.

It was a week into winter break so we couldn't gather the forces around for a party like last time, but we were all losing our shit. Kevin was losing his shit. He couldn't believe how stupid he was to try this course, he couldn't believe that six people busted their ass just to make sure he didn't die, and he couldn't believe that the professor basically just passed him out of sheer effort alone.

He said it was the stupidest thing he'd ever done, and while I doubt that, it was outrageously stupid. And yet, I've never been so invested in a fellow student before. I'm prouder of Kevin's C than I am of my own B. I was walking on sunshine for weeks after that. In theory, my senior project was building a functioning washing machine, but in practice, in my heart, it was helping Kevin pass Intro to Quantum for Electrical Engineers.

(And as an epilogue: No, he did not renounce Catholicism and become an atheist like his roommate had hoped. He did walk out changed. I think that being that wrong about something, and realizing it, was a pivotal moment for him. It's hard to be dogmatic once you realize that a lifetime of being wrong feels exactly like a lifetime of being right, right up until the last two seconds of it.)

[respectthepetty]

Pride Petty Watch (The Untamed) 1/?

I let the crowd pick which two blacklisted shows I would watch from my Petty List, so I flew through the first one knowing I had this 50-episode beast waiting for me. People have warned me that the first two episodes wouldn't make sense, there are a ton of characters to keep track of, I need to watch it at normal speed, and I need to keep the sound on. Therefore, I was already mad before I hit play, yet somehow I started the first episode, blacked out, and emerged five episodes later.

Which means I like it so far, and here's some quick reasons why:

Before I start, these two better be an item because they are my favorite BTS song aka "🔥" and since I haven't seen them in the present yet, I'm fearing something happened to them in that great battle in the past, and if so, I'M GOING TO BE BE LIVID! I've had them for three whole minutes, and they are everything to me, so I feel this story is going to fuck me over.

Everyone is chasing after this golden black snitch, yet nobody is catching it, so although there is a lot of death happening, I'm laughing.

If you squint, My Stand-In and The Untamed are the same. Boys who fell off a cliff come back in another body only to live the same life with the same people and make the same bad decisions. Cool cool cool.

This current lecturer is stating nobody could find the body but he fell into fire/lava, so what body were they thinking they would find?! Also, don't think I didn't catch homeboy getting in trouble in the past for asking in class what happens when a spirit demands revenge and the instructor got upset because look where we are now! Possession of a body for the sake of revenge. Should've entertained the question, professor, because sixteen years later, it will come back to haunt you, literally.

And homeboy applied his own theory of making the possessed bodies work for him to fight the other body. He is a smart cookie, and that's why the original Moo Moo person gave his body up to him.

@dribs-and-drabbles, if this is why you told me I needed the sound on, I'm confident I'm not going to remember this melody. And how is he playing a leaf right now?

I can't take this seriously. This feels like an 80s music video, and he is about to hit me with the hottest synthesizer intro.

And the sword has the golden black snitch in it. *Pikachu face*

I can't play an instrument but for a DIY flute made out of bamboo on the spot, I thought his playing was excellent. For people being saved from being squashed, they are some haters, and I would have stopped playing just so they could suffer.

I picked up that sister is dead in the future, but her kid is a brat, and I would've been mean to him too.

And did the brother really kill him in that battle on the hill because when the entire crowd was like "you killed him, right?", he was looking like . . .

So this is the brat's daddy? It would make sense that a man who shut down an entire hotel for his party would have a son who sets 400 traps so nobody else can catch anything. The privilege is genetic.

I like him AND I respect him. He has priorities and they are to drink and party because even when he came back in that other body, he snatched the liquor. As the opening showed, he's here for a good time, not a long time.

I don't like Fuddy Duddy. He can remember 3,500 rules (this place is where fun goes to die), but couldn't remember to tell my party bro that his sister and brother were inside? Everybody just left homeboy without a note saying where they are, and Fuddy Duddy had the information, yet was too busy lecturing about rules. AND committed the ultimate party foul and wasted the liquor. Make that the 3,501th rule! He's lucky he can lay the synthesizer so well.

This is where the big battle is/was (Nightvale, Nightshade, NightWhatever), and I hope this man died in it because he is doing TOO MUCH! "I don't fear death; I fear boredom" YOU'RE boring! Shut up and go collect the pieces of that dumb rock, Thanos Jr., so we can get this battle going.

HE BROUGHT A BIRD INTO CLASS! This is the everyday American high school class.

Why is everyone in the Fire Nation so pissed? Is it because it's hot there? All of y'all are doing too much except for that sister and her brother. I know that brother was the zombie guy from the statue fight, so that means the main homeboy was talking to Fire Nation sister at the graves. That was her family's grave, and she must be a good person, who is probably dead now too.

So they can all play magical instruments? They're like Josie and the Pussycats, playing gigs between fighting crime.

The brat's dad is gold, the Cloud Recesses (what is this name about because they should be a lot more fun with a name like that?) are white and blue, and the Fire Nation is red, so it's odd that homeboy had the dark blue robes with red underneath before coming to school, and keeps getting really friendly with the fire people. Plus the cloud people's power is blue, but his comes out in bursts of red. Is his daddy really Fire Nation? Get Maury on the line.

So his bird buddy gave him porn, which he gave to Fuddy Duddy, who then ripped it up. No wonder why he is so good at school and remembers 3,500 rules. Got nothing but time on his hands since he isn't using his hands doing anything else by being so repressed.

Fuddy Duddy just said he doesn't touch people, yet in the very beginning he snatched homeboy's hand without hesitation, so he wouldn't fall to his death. Then, he snatched that premium liquor for him. I see you and your heart on your sleeve, my man! Just like this water demon, the feelings are sneaking up on you and snatching you up!

Should've bought her the comb, bro, because she's going to be dead after that big battle since she was sent to snoop for the Fire Nation. Even though she is trying to help her brother, I feel this will be y'alls Romeo and Juliet moment.

So the brother was always going to come back from the dead since he already was cursed(?), and my homeboy is once again proving to be a friend to all. I like you, and I will learn your name, hopefully by episode 28.

Only three marks healed in the present, so whoever is the last mark has to be one of these hoochies, and the more backstory I get, the more I think it's going to hurt when I find out who the last mark is.

Half these people have already died leading up to that big battle and the other half will die as homeboy sets out on his Kill Bill journey, so like . . .

"You and I have unfinished business"

*slams on the 'next' button*

[solurae]

four eyes (more to love underneath the frames) : prologue

nerd!miguel o’hara is the talk of the town and i wanna put my own spin on it :D sooo expect a little bit of everything hehe :DDD - HAHA AS I WAS WRITING THIS I REALISED I GOT TOO INVESTED SETTING THE SCENE SO I MIGHT MAKE THIS A SERIES! i’ll just say this is a prologue hooray

IF YOU WOULD LIKE A SERIES PLS INTERACT!!! FEEL FREE TO ASK TOO TO SHARE YOUR MIGGY THOUGHTS AND I WILL HAPPILY INDULGE US BOTH :3

a distinct pair of black, rectangular glasses were adjusted by miguel’s middle finger before it glided across the pages of notes he wrote from the lecture for his genetics class. a class that you both happen to share, but neither of you knew that yet.

miguel o’hara - a man so deep in his books that he might as well be the dean of the dean’s list - payed no heed to anyone or anything that could hinder his focus. the furrowing of brows indicated further analysis rather than the annoyance towards second year business majors. no, he wasn’t the annoying, stuck-up person who would ask more questions than give answers. he thinks they’re wasting their time anyway. he was always the last person to leave the lecture theatre. miguel would be huddled by the professor, covering the whiteboard with punnett squares or outlining control variables for the next lab.

he was only person in your genetics class that had a real chance of passing the course, the scowls of your peers and your friends could attest to that.

you wouldn’t say you were on the same boat as everyone though, your friends were always nagging you to help them but you couldn’t even figure out how you understood some of the content. this specific course was an integral part of your degree and the best chance of impressing the school, you had to give it your all.

you would be lying if genetic sequences and chromosomes weren’t the only things you had memorised. you loved the hue of brown locks that would shine from the tall windows of the theatre, the curls which your eyes would follow forever if he happened to sit in front of you. the pout of his lips as he’d scratch his hair in response to a lab practical that didn’t make sense, only for him to make sense of it hours later.

his eyes were red. it was his most defining feature, and a key factor to why - to your advantage, if you really think about it - people steer clear of o’hara. as much as it increases your chances of befriending him, let alone being with him, your classmates and other students weren’t so quiet about their dislike for the irish-mexican spectacle.

he’s so quiet. too quiet.

he looks like a freak! look at his eyes, bro. what is he some fucking vampire or something?

no wonder he’s on the dean’s list because he isn’t on anyone else’s for sure.

god he’s just so…

weird.

miguel was extremely fit, which was what confused a lot of people when they found out he wasn’t a copy-paste jock that still thinks they’re in highschool like most men of his stature were. his build put them to shame regardless. after being bombarded by women and men of every cohort - only for miguel to ignore them or coldly decline - word spread like wildfire and soon enough people were disappointed that the former heart-throb of first and second year turned out to be a major loser. some people would go out of their way to show how much they don’t like him, and these are people miguel’s never even spoken to. they would “crash” into him walking across campus, try and trip him over and even go as far as sitting on the other side of the room if it wasn’t so clear already.

but he didn’t mind. he was always at the library, the lab or the cafeteria closest to the lab anyway. it bothered you to see him alone and quiet unless he had a question or an answer, you genuinely wanted to be friends with him.

but as the story goes, it’s always these type of men that have a part of themselves they keep under wraps. you just know that there’s more to his brooding and stoic nature, the carnelian shades of his eyes lured you closer as opposed to keeping you away.

you decided to do honours for two reasons: a better resume and the fact that miguel unsurprisingly decided to do it too. you had a thesis in your head and you had all year to test it out.

miguel o’hara was more than just some nerd and you were gonna need more than glasses to prove it.

🩷 — PART ONE!

[withlove-xixi]

— BABY FEVER: chilchuck x f!reader

ᥫ cw: pregnancy + established relationship, also one inuendo ᥫ wc: 2841 ★ this has been stuck on my mind for sooo long! i jst want it to be a bit silly teehee >_<! cross posted on ao3

— THERE ARE TIMES WHEN INSTINCT JUST KICKS IN

[♡]: for chilchuck, his instincts kicked in as often as you'd think (especially with laios as a party leader). it was a trait his colleagues admired him for, it made him responsible, dependable. it was a trait chilchuck prided himself it— was he to blame when it came in so handy? though of all the times his instinct saved his ass, there was one he'd have been far more at peace dealing with on his own.

CHILCHUCK'S KEEN SENSES COME IN HANDY.

As a half-foot, his senses were better than other races, having the ability to hear better and smell better, to an extent. He would be alert too with the things he'd sense, shifts in temperature, whispers in the wind. It all came in handy in the dungeon, where Chilchuck would always be first to sniff out any danger.

Like the last time he had ventured down there with the party and Laios had clumsily triggered a trap on accident.

There was a sound, so soft it was nearly silent. It grates in Chilchuck's ear, causing his brows to furrow slightly. Usually in the dungeon, there were all sorts of strange noises Chilchuck normally wouldn't give a second thought to, but this was different. It was louder, therefore closer, therefore— "EVERYBODY RUN." Not a second wasted as everyone quickly followed Chilchuck's instruction, sprinting far and fast into the next room as the walls behind them began to close in on each other. Of course once everyone got to safety, they had thanked and praised him for his quick reaction, saving everyone from another death. Chilchuck had sighed, assessing everyone's safety before promptly going to Laios to scold him for his clumsiness.

Chilchuck's experience comes in handy too.

Whether it was picking locks, bargaining for deals, or patching up worn clothes, Chilchuck's experience always came in clutch.

It was a while back when you two had first moved in together in Chilchuck's house. Chilchuck was proud of your decision, enjoying the newfound domesticity that came with it. "STOP FUCKING YELLING, CALM DOWN!" As domestic as things can get, you supposed. He had clicked his tongue in frustration, wedging one of his tools against his lips and he worked on picking the lock with another. Sweat had dripped down his forehead, sticking stray strands of his bangs against his skin as he worked. He could hear you speak, something a bit panicked and muffled. He had huffed through his nose, if he wasn't holding his tool in his mouth, he would've scolded you again. Of course, he already had and was planning to scold you some more once he got you out of the locked storage room. How could you be so foolish as to break the lock on accident? You were literally living with a locksmith for crying out loud. Once he had gotten you out though (which he himself found miraculous, because you really did some serious damage to the lock) and found you all frazzled and sweaty, and decided to spare you the lecture for now. Chilchuck had wrapped you in his arms and promised to fix the lock in the morning.

Combined, forms what becomes Chilchuck's instinct. He's proud of the person he's grown to be; proud of the big things he's able to do with his instinct, like keeping his friends out of danger when working in the dungeon, and little things too, like last week when he quickly caught the glass you had accidentally knocked off the dining table. While he'd never admit it, it always made him feel warm inside, knowing he had the ability to protect the people he cared about.

Only now, he felt less warm about the feeling and more like he needed to puke right this instant.

Chilchuck cannot recall when he started to truly notice things, but he remembers smaller details scattered around the past few weeks (Gods, had it nearly been a month?). He remembers going out to get you some food you had been whining about craving for a while, he remembers you grouchily scolding him for something then apologizing to him tearfully not ten minutes after.

But when exactly did it start?

Chilchuck's instinct kicked in far too quickly for him to even register that something was up. With you, he had always been more protective, of course he had to be twice as alert as when he was in the dungeon. But this turned out to be his downfall.

Because last night when he pulled you closer to him, his hand brushed over your belly and he instantly freezes. He felt it, and as soon as he did, he realized what it was — what it meant.

A small bump. A small bump he might not have even noticed but it was you, he's notice if you had lost an eyelash.

There was no denying it. You were, based off all the obvious signs he really should've seen sooner, pregnant. And Chilchuck didn't know what to feel. On one hand, he's quite happy, excited even. That's his baby in your belly. It's the same part of him that feels somewhat proud of it, a way to show off that he was truly yours, and you were truly his. It was sweet. He felt warm.

On the other hand, he was totally fucked. For one thing, this was never planned. Sure, the conversation of kids came up every now and then, but he never thought it might've actually happened. He was certain that you both were well into the age where it was nearly impossible for this to happen. Of course it wasn't entirely a bad thing. Chilchuck's survived three daughters, what's another kid? But it's so agonizing to even begin to imagine the rest of his life with an unplanned kid (as happy as Chilchuck is to have another one, he's not as happy to have his perfect little life for two be so suddenly changed without prior notice).

Another thing is his daughters. Sure, his daughters were old enough, they were mature too. He's certain he's raised them well enough to handle the situation with grace, but another sibling? From their 29 year old dad? He's knows they wouldn't mind too much, in fact Puck and Fler might be more than excited to have a new sibling. But as much as he knows that, he knows it would be awkward (though he fears it would be awkward mostly for him, but awkward nonetheless), it would be a bit strange for the girls to have to watch a new sibling grow up when they're already old.

Oh my gods. Oh my gods, did you even know?

It was the thought that rang in Chilchuck's head as he paced around the kitchen, hand on his chin, eyebrows furrowed in deep thought.

Chilchuck's certainly figured it out, but did you? As silly as it is for a pregnant woman not to notice (especially when it was beginning to be noticeable for others), it wasn't entirely impossible. The same happened when they had Meijack, but then they had both caught onto the signs very early on (it helped too that they had been going on regular check ups for it). This time? Gods, Chilchuck was certain you hadn't noticed. You had no reason to hide it from him after all, and even if you were trying to, you were acting far too normal to raise any suspicion.

Chilchuck's mind races with all sorts of thoughts but one thing rings clear, he has to tell you about the pregnancy.

How is the bigger thought that follows. For sure he could just sit you down and explain things. You weren't some child that needed sugarcoating, it wouldn't change the fact that you were pregnant anyway. But still, it felt strange to do it like that (that and Chilchuck wpuld like to avoid direct conforntation as much as he can, even with you).

Maybe he could tell you over dinner? Prepare a nice meal, one of your favorites or something you've been craving, and tell you then when you're all comfortable and happy. But it felt a bit disingenuous. Plus it would basically be like sugarcoating the whole ordeal.

He could try to tell you indirectly? Write a letter about it and ask you to open it only when Chil was out of the house. Though it wouldn't work because he knows you'd attempt to beat him to death as soon as he stepped through the front door, and as the new father-to-be (as if he isn't already a father) wanted to be there when you know. He wants to see how you'd react, and he'd want to be there for you.

Perhaps he would take you to the doctor for a "routine check up" and have the doctor tell you instead. Though it wouldn't work because he knows you'd beat him to death as soon as you realize he knew beforehand and the whole doctor's trip was a set-up. But it would be nice to have a check up for the baby then and there too, kill two birds with one stone.

Chilchuck sighs in defeat, completely clueless on how to tell you. From what he sees, there are two valid and plausible options; one, he ask help from a friend to help him set up something nice so he could announce the news to you in a gentle and elegang manner; or two, he pretends not to know and wait until you figure out on your own.

Option two would be best. Right on time because as soon as he decides on the (cowardly) route to take, he hears the wooden door creak and you huff in exhaustion. Immediately, he rushes to your side, kissing your temple and taking away the heavy groceries from your hands (because pregnant women shouldn't be carrying heavy things).

"You're sweet tonight, Chil," you say playfully. "Did you do something bad?"

You hold half the fault. He thinks as he carries the groceries to the kitchen. "Can't I be sweet to my favorite girl?"

You giggle and he sighs with relief, letting go of breath he didn't know he was holding. He places the groceries on the counter, a basket full of assorted fruits, two loaves of bread, a jug of milk, a bottle of wine, and good gods, how the hell did you carry all these on your own? Chilchuck's begins to wonder if maybe you weren't pregnant and were simply getting a bit chubbier (he certainly was) and maybe all the mood swings were from your period coming up, and maybe your body aches were from working yourself too hard, and maybe your cravings were from your period coming up also.

The brief moment of silence in his mind that everything might've been product of his overthinking ends abruptly when he hears you stumble to the bathroom and immediately hears you puke after.

Again, he's rushing to your side, holding stray strands of hair back and soothingly rubbing circles on your back. He coos gently at you, calming you down.

"I'll get you some water," he says, though he only attempts to leave the bathroom when you nod in confirmation.

In the kitchen, he tries to calm himself as more thoughts and worries go through his head. On one hand, option two is a nice easy way out of confrontation. You get to figure it out all on your own and Chilchuck and live a nice happy rest of his twenty or so years with the love of his life telling the silly story of how she found out about their kid. On the other, surely you must be suffering a lot. It must be strange to you to feel all these symptoms but have no clue as to what's causing them if you had even thought each were relating to the same source. It would be better to man up and tell you so you'd at least have something to blame for being grouchy or wanting to eat grilled kraken parasite again. But again, if he tells you now, you'd be a bit frustrated for not knowing it sooner. Though wouldn't you be more frustrated to keep going through these unknown symptoms? And—

There's a strained huff behind him that pulls him out of his thoughts.

"Woah hey, what're doing?" He asks as he rushes to you for the third time that evening. He sets the glass of water down on the counter next to the groceries and tries to wrestle the basket of fruit from your hands.

"Putting away the groceries, Chil, what does it look like I'm doing?" You ask, giving him a small glare, clearly somewhat annoyed.

"Here, let me do it." He offers, finally taking the basket from your hands.

You pout at him, which would normally be very dangerous bit Chilchuck's thinking enough to remember pregnant women shouldn't carry heavy things, but let him take the fruit anyway. Chilchuck smiles at you first to try and put you at ease before he goes to grab a step stool. He sets it down and begins reaching for a pretty bowl to display the fruit in. Thank gods you were being somewhat reasonable (he recalls how a few days ago you were being very insistent you didn't need his help with directions in a bazaar at the other side of town and got yourself lost for a bit and he mentally curses at himself for so foolishly letting a pregnant woman wander around aimlessly in a hot, crowded marketplace) and prays lady luck would string him some more miracles as he continues working with option two—

There's a clink and a pop below him that pulls him out of his thoughts.

Chilchuck nearly drops the bowl he's holding (which would definitely have gotten him beat to death for) as he exclaims, "H-hey! What do you think you're doing?"

You look up at him with a confused look, stopping your pour of wine only when the glass is shy of being half-full. "What is it now?" You ask and he can definitely hear the growing frustration in your tone. "I haven't had the best day, I just want to unwind a bit."

There's a panicked look on his face as he steps down from the stool. "You can't." The way his says it makes your eyebrows tilt downwards to glare at him.

"And why not?" You ask, your tone turning from sour to angry.

Chilchuck sets the bowl down next to the forgotten glass of water. "Well, why should you? There are other ways to unwind you know?" He says without thinking much and begins to set the fruit in the bowl, trying his best not to raise anymore suspicion.

There's a silence that falls in the kitchen and Chilchuck is scared he was getting beat anyway. But then he hears the distinct sound of a wine bottle and a wine glass clink against the counter (of course those small sounds would be familar to a man like Chilchuck) and it takes all his power not to heave a sigh of relief.

Short lived relief because when you wrap your arms around his torso you whisper in his ear, "hm, what sort of other ways, Chil?"

Startled, he jolts upwards and drops an apple. "I didn't... I-I didn't mean it like that!" Chilchuck says, almost in a scolding manner but his face grows red so it's quite difficult to even discern his tone.

You hum again, pressing your face against his neck just so your nose brushes against his skin and your hot breath warms it up. Oh this really would've been dangerous for Chilchuck. "Not like you to have cold feet." You say in a teasing manner, but Chilchuck can feel his stress levels rising too much to even be a bit riled up by you right now.

He turns and grabs you by the shoulders. "Really, I didn't mean that." He says somewhat sternly, but he quickly gives you a shaky smile when he sees the corners of your lips twitch downward.

Your eyes study his and he feels like maybe option two was the worse of two evils. Your lips press into a thin line, clearly you sense something is up, it's evident in the way you're ready to pounce at him with all sorts of unbelieve accusations.

He lets go of your shoulders and sighs in defeat. "It's complicated," he says, almost dejectedly.

And you frown at his tone. You carefully place a hand on his cheek, he turns his head to kiss your palm.

"Anything wrong, you can tell me, Chilchuck." You say in such a reassuring tone, he's almost ready to just spill the beans.

And really, he is.

At the end of the day, he gets to be with you. It's all he's ever wanted since he fell hard and fast for your beauty and wit and warmth, and now you both get to send the rest of your domestic fantasies come true with a kid; a kid that's his and yours, in a house that's his and yours, living a life that will be only his and yours.

Chilchuck smiles gently, genuinely. What's going through some trouble now if it meant he got to spend the rest of his life with you?

[lavender--fairy]

𝐁𝐞 𝐀 𝐃𝐨𝐞𝐫

Fantasizing about your desires is one thing and applying what you've learned is another. You have to understand that you could acquire all the knowledge about the law, you can listen to every lecture Neville has ever held but unless and until you apply what you know the law is a total waste. That is why Neville openly invites people to test the law over and over again. I've been there too, i knew about SATS, i knew i should ignore the outer world, i knew i should accept imagination as the one and only reality but never applied and then would stress and be confused as to why the 3d wasn't reflecting my desires. If i'm being honest i've spend more time "thinking of" and fantasizing about my desires than "thinking from" and accepting them as fulfilled and that was the reason for my failure for a long time. You might be doing the same, all the posts you've saved, all the notes you've made...Are you applying what is being said there or you read and be like "wow this makes total sense" and then going back to the old story.

"Knowing what to do is one thing. Doing it is another; and we are called upon to be doers of the word, and not just hearers only, deceiving ourselves. You can read one of my books over and over again. You can tell others what the book says, but if you never apply it’s message, the mere reading of its word will not benefit you. But if you will test your imagination, it will prove itself in performance" -Neville Goddard

"But grant me the freedom to change it (my state)– don’t leave me in the state if I desire to get out of it. Yet many a person wallows in it, and wallows in it morning, noon, and night, and they are totally unaware they are doing it. They will say, “Oh, yes,” and then five seconds later they are back in that state (Old Man). I have had interviews with people who will say to me, “This is what I would like, but I must first tell you . . . .” Don’t tell me anything! Tell me what you want – they are only states! They insist on wallowing in all the things of the past." - Neville

"Don't tell me anything!" That is the secret. Total self-abandonment to the current State is the way to bring life towards the New State.You have to die to what you do not want to express entirely, a true act of surrender. You can do it.

This is how to know if you are "thinking of" or "thinking from"

I doubted that it could come to pass. I desperately wanted it to come but I doubted it could. I lived on "hope" which made me feel anxious. Why did I doubt? Because I would tell myself all the reasons why it could not happen, it seemed "too far-fetched." I looked to the outside all day long for signs or confirmation that what I want is either coming or is possible.

Now, this is thinking-of your desire. This is hoping it will come. Hope is a great thing. Hope is desire. But,

"hope deferred makes the heart go sick, but a desire fulfilled is the tree of life." - Pslam 13:12

Hope is your desire, but it up to you to fulfill it.

Now, let's look at the opposite. This is "thinking-from" your desire which will cause you peace and ease.

I know it will come to pass. I know it will because Consciousness is the only reality, and what I do in consciousness it will be duplicated here. You assume NOT for it to be so, but because it IS so. I only look within for confirmation. It is my Word over everything. If I say I Am within, then I Am. -Edward art (full post)

[joocomics]

YOU PUT A SPELL ON ME ( SNEAK PEEK )

─ ⋆ dinna’s holiday special 2024 ⋆༄

✭ event is 18+ only

pairing: non-idol!gunil x fem!reader | professor!gunil x student!reader

genre: smut, slice of life, university au | wc: 8k+

summary: when your parents shake hands with new business partners they get invited for one festive weekend at their expensive villa. although it’s the last place you want to waste time at, you understand how and why these people are important for your family business, so you agree to join them. the last person you expect to see there is your professor who you’ve been having a secret crush on… and who also politely said no after you asked him out last semester…

contains: switch!gunil, temperature play and more…

♫ get in the mood: you put a spell on me - austin giorgio, come on - jhené aiko, you keep me up at night - the driver era, igloo - kiss of life

taglist is open! comment or send me an ask and i will add you right away ♡

[ event masterlist | general masterlist ]

“Fuck—“ you put enough amount of pressure and feel his nose pushing nicely against your clit; his flat tongue pressing more insistently, turning his mind foggy with the sweet taste it’s collecting with each lick. “Would you ever… have me like this in your cabinet?”

You tug on his hair as a sign for him to look up. Once he does, you notice his eyes are glazed over with sensuality that has your heart fluttering; his lips are glistening and puffy all because of you.

“In the same cabinet I share with two more people?”

You nod playfully while tugging at his collar; as much as you like the touch of his mouth you need to be on top of him as soon as possible.

“Obviously they’re not staying there all day,” you comment as he gets rid of his black underwear. The sudden view of his thickness, the way you can already tell how heavy it would feel in your hand makes you go silent mid sentence; your lips form an oh before you simply ask: “Can I?”

Gunil steps forward summoned by your voice. His hand lowers his erection as you kneel on the bed with tongue eager to explore the oozing spot of his tip.

Both of you hum in bliss just seconds apart; you because of his taste, and he, because of the thrill of having your lips hugging the head of his cock. His hips slowly rock forward in order to invite more of his length between your hollowed cheeks and move backwards as you glance up at him with look in your eyes that has him suppressing cusses.

“Take it slow baby,” he whispers after noticing the way you force your mouth to stretch wider, to take more and endure more of his size. “You’re doing good already.”

Your fingers go around the base as you drag your slick lips thoroughly; muffling little sounds every time you welcome his tip deeper. Once you sense a slight pain spreading in your jaw you decide to empty your mouth and stroke him top to bottom while catching your breath.

Gunil watches your saliva being smeared everywhere, marking the sheets with dark wet spots.

“I’ll do even better once I sit on it.” You give his tip one last kiss and shift to the other side of the bed so he can lay down. “Leave the shirt on, please.”

Gunil breathes out a chuckle at your request, but truthfully he cannot deny that he does feel a certain satisfaction from the fact you get turned on by seeing him like this.

Does this mean you’ve been aroused during some of his lectures?

♡ … full fic will be out in december

[memoiich]

Obi wan Headcanons my lord? feed the poor

God, I have a lot of them .I'm going to split this up in a few parts just because it makes sense . Strap in !!!

Part 0: baby obi wan

His parents noticed that he was a surprisingly bright child, and since they were farmers from stewjon, they weren’t well off. When they had their second child (a son) they brought obi wan to a near by testing unit on the neighbour planet Klommet , in hopes of giving both him and his brother a better chance at survival.

Obi wan was tested at the age 1 and a half. He was clearly gifted but nothing special.

He used to cry a lot when he first got to the jedi temple. Most jedi got rather annoyed at the younglings crying, except one ,qui gon jin .

Qui gon voluntured a lot at the creshe , he believed that crying children needed confort not a lecture. Obi wan got attached to qui gon rather quickly as a 2 year old ( qui gon looks a bit like his late dad)

As he grew up , he got along well with the other children and formed close friendships with them ( po ,kit ,quinlan) . Seeing this, qui gon went back to helping the new kids.

Part 1 : padawan years

Obi wan is rather talented at most things, not on a “ WOW YOU’RE THE BEST “ way but more like a “…that shouldn’t go so easily “ . He picks things up quickly, which causes him to be rather inpatient. Not impulsive, he doesn’t rush he simply hates waiting. That's why he hates meditating. He doesn’t understand it.

He doesn’t know it but when discussing who would get which apprentice , his name fell quite a few times . Obi wan likes to learn and so many suspect that he would be a nice well behaved padawan.

He was so happy when they informed him that qui gon would be his master . Qui gon had always stood out as the nicest jedi , not that the others weren’t but he had seemed to understand obi wan a bit more.

The first thing qui gon asked of him was to meditate. Obi wan started stressing immediately, and it went pretty bad in the beginning. Qui gon thought it was hilarious how quickly he was distracted. “ the wall paper does not need your attention right now “ he would quip or “ breathe through your nose and dont rush it” . It took obi Wan's a year to truly be able to meditate properly.

Luckily time wasn’t wasted because his fight skills and knowledge were unmatched.

Piloting took some getting used to. Not only was he scared of heights , but he also wasn’t a fan of rollercoasters. Qui gon always noted how slow he was . “ If you keep flying like this, we won't get there before im 60 “ or “ we can always walk , it might be faster” . But his master did help him, he would go to more desserted planets with obi wan . The planets that even if he would fly faster, he couldn’t hit anything . Obi wan got his red piloting bead 5 months later with the promise to let go a little.

He picks up quickly with missions , like i said he’s a natural . His first mission was a bit stressful but after that hes pretty much set . Also when they get back to their ship , qui gon cooks a home cooked meal because hes not going to let obi wan live on war rashens and blue milk.

He also teaches him how to cook

Obi wan starts feeling a bit quilty because he starts thinking of qui gon as his dad since well he is a little. But the jedi code says no attachments and he will follow that . Until he has a nervous breakdown because if qui gon is a jedi master that follows the jedi code he probably doesn’t care about him , he ends up getting in quite a lot of danger on a mission because of this . When he confesses to qui gon why he did all that he doesn’t respond,he just pulls his padawan into a hug . “ you are my kid obi wan ��

When he turns 20 , he starts to really push qui gonn to let him take his trials. He just wants to be a jedi master.

That all changes a bit when he meets the dutches of mandelore Satine . He falls inlove quickly but he’s a real coward about it ( Satine notices) . Satine ends up pulling him into a kiss 2 months later at a gala she had to attend. They had a night together……

Qui gonn knows 100% . He finds it hilarious how his bumbling fool of a padawan got himsel into this mess . He prepares for the inevitable “ im leaving the order “ not that he wants him to . Obi wan is just that kinda kid .

When he sees obi wan the next morning, he looks like he cried acts rather somber and asks when they are leaving . Qui gon figures out what happened but doesn’t say anything. They leave and he gives him some space .

For the next 2 years it all goes smoothly until…

Part 2: early Anakin years

Obi wan isn’t too happy with the orphan. They are on a dangerous mission in the middle of who knows where with the queen of a planet that’s about to die . And now they have Ani , he wasn't going to lie it was a sweet child . But why now.

Obi wan has a quiet panic attack when qui gon says he will take anakin as his apprentice . He doesn’t feel ready to take the trials since his self esteem plummeted a bit after the Satine debacle and no one helped him take care of that ( fuck the jedi council) .

During the flight back to Naboo, padme went to her room and qui gon had a call with the council, leaving obi Wan to babysit ani . The child would yap non stop “ Did you make your own lightsaber?” “Yes” “can i hold it?” “No” “ when do i get mine?” “ When you're ready” “ but i am ready” “ no you’re not “ “yes i am “ “ no you’re not “ “ Did you choose THAT color?” “ Yes, i did” “ It's kinda ugly” “…” . A true test of patience but strangly lovable.

About 2 hours later was when the child fell asleep next to obi Wan . Anakin was still shivering , tattooine was a warm planet, something the ship heaters couldn’t compete with. Obi wan draped his long outer coat over the boy in hopes of giving him some warmth . Seeing the child peacefully asleep, Obi wan realised why his master liked him.

It took 48 hours to get to Naboo . It also took 48 hours for Obi wan to look at Anakin as his little brother.

When he first sees Maul he’s scared . He doesn’t want to be, but he simply is . Back in school him and his friends would joke about the sith and how cool it would be to defeat one . Right now , face to face with the first sith in ages , he’s horrified, and the red zebrak seems to kick on it

All he hears are the red force feels buzzing . He doesn’t hear his own scream or the blood dripping from his master . He feels an immense amount of pain, but the moment those shields lay down, he's up . He only focuses on gett to his master in time .And when he’s hanging in the hole , he snaps back into his jedi mind. The sith shows a new hubris, and he sees his chance. He wins

When qui gonn tells him his final wish , he can only lie to him . He doesn’t feel fit to be a master ,he might be the only jedi who pased the old trials ( to kill a sith ), but he feels like a fraud to weak to safe his master. Qui gon passes in his arms and obi wans let the tears fall.

He sees Anakin after he returns from his “trip” and he almost wants to cry again . Anakin looks so confused “ where’s qui gon ?” “ he passed away , anakin” The tears start to well in the little boys eyes, and all that obi can do is pull him into a hug .

The next weeks are quite hard , anakin becomes his padawan, and he becomes a jedi master. They attend qui gons' funeral, and anakins enters the academy since he needs to do both his padawan ship and the basic training. He is a bit pissy about it , but obi Wan cheers him up with home cooked meals .

They are not allowed to go on mission yet together just obi wan alone, and its extremely hard breaking to leave anakin alone .

When they are home together, obi wan pampers the little guy rotten. He brushes and braids anakins hair he buys him miniatuur planes in hopes of getting a better piolet than he is . He helps him with his homework, and he is just a total single dad .

When about a year has passed obi wan realised that he didn't know his birthday so he asked ani and he didn’t know either . They chose marche 5th because its a week from then and obi Wan can plan his birthday.Ani loved it.

Anakin doesn't make a lot of friends in school or anywhere. Which bothers obi Wan greatly , he thinks anakin is a great kid who can do no wrong. It all escalated when a child calls Anakin a slave ( obi wan does not know how they got here )

Obi wan threatens to destroy him to the boys face . He ends up crying, and Anakin isn’t bothered ever again. ( the jedi council was not happy )

And so it pretty much continues for a few years

Part 3: late anakin years

Anakin is now 20 years old, which is double the age he was when obi Wan met him .

Many people think that obi Wan is past his prime, but this man is absolutely ribbed. He has perfect physique, he’s just covered in robes and coats and stuff

He keeps extra kyber crystals around because Anakin keeps losing/breaking his lightsaber

Anakin requested black robes, and the council wouldn’t let him because of the association with the sith, and obi wan was like “ No , let my padawan express himself . Plus, I killed the last sith years ago “ so they let him because nothing is scarier than getting on obi wans' bad side

When they meet padmé again, obi Wan is almost laughing at how bad anakin is hiding his feelings for her . He also realises that he will have to talk to his padawn about it .

Obi wan gets a little stricter over the last year since anakin definitely doesn't think before he does anything

When the council decided to let Anakin go with Padme , he couldn't help but warn anakin once again. He reminds him of the problems that might occur or the heartbreak ( he's definitely not projecting)

When shmi dies, he tries his best to support anakin best he can . He doesn’t remember his parents, but he assumes it's like losing Qui gon, so he does everything he needed back then . Home cooked meals ,hugs ,pep talks, pulling him out of mission….

He noticed from the moment they set foot into the arena that they were together. On the one hand, he was extremely nervous about it, and on the other, he was a bit proud of his boy.

ALSO, he gets that shiver down his spine because he realises that qui gon knew about him and Satine, and he's a bit embarrassed about it .

He doesn't tell it to anakin because just like his master he thinks that it might be better to give them space .

He gets really offended that he wasn't invited to the wedding. He knows it was supposed to be undercover, but please

Padme and anakin will sometimes invite him for dinner as if they aren't dating, and he truly enjoys those evenings together.

He likes padme immensely . She helps to calm anakin down, and she's all around a great person .

She's also the first out of her and anakin to realise that obi Wan knows . Sadly, this happens after the wedding, so now it's like a shared secret.

Now that anakin left the nest , he gets to enjoy hobbies. He starts experimenting with cooking until Kit , Quinlan and Po are so done with it that they start ordering out . Then he gets a pet a feathered veractyle he names boga , when the planet he’s visiting allows it she will be his transport . He also keeps a variety of plants ( they remind him of qui gon) and books .he collects golden trinkets. Anakin jokes that it all goes against the jedi code, but he likes it .

HE ALSO LOVES TO GOSSIP with his clones anakin padme kit po anyone that wants to listen.

Talking about his clones , he loves them dearly not as much as anakin but like coby is one of his closest friends.

212 has tried to give him nicknames before, but it never sticks , they do like saying the negotiator in funny voices .

Obi wan thinks that his clones are the best clones, but it seems that every jedi thinks that.

He is now a jedi council member, and he still has that off feeling that he doesn’t deserve it . His ideas dont link with the others, and he feels that he doesn't have a lot of influence on it . Qui gon was never part of it, and he understands why more and more. He loves being a jedi master but kinda hates the council.

That also makes it really hard for him to help Anakin with his dissatisfaction with his position rn . Being on the council but not a master feels like the worst-case scenario, but he has to help anakin not be pissy, so he does . It is a great honor to be on the council.

He didn't know about padmé being pregnant. So he just thought anakin was so stressed out about his career and the jedi order . After everything happened as it did , he felt that he didn’t support anakin correctly.

Obi wan objected when they wanted anakin to spy on Palpetine . He doesn’t want his boy near any danger and definitely not in the front line . He yells and fights for it until it goes to a vote, just as his seat on the council, obi Wan would leave the council immediately if it meant that Anakin was 100% safe . In the end , the vote goes for the spying and obi wans demands to tell anakin himself. It doesn’t go well, obi Wan feels like he's betraying his brother.

In the coming weeks, he will see the loveable orphan of tatooine change to a traumatized war veteran, and he's not happy about it. He tries to calm him down and speak to him just like he did when shmi died . Sadly, this time, it doesn’t seem to work.

When his clones betray him , he feels fear for the first time since the deul of the faiths . Not only is he in danger, but they are in danger , anakin might be in danger . He feels his life falling from betw his fingers . Boga and some of his dear clones die when he gets back to his ship . He calls to anakin, but he doesn’t pick up . He flies to the temple.

When yoda and him visit the temple, dread fills his mind. He still didn’t receive anything from anakin and was really worried about it . They see the temple lithered with death children, and all he sees are small Anakin's death on the floor . Then they see the footage of the night before, and the world falls beneath him . Anakin is a murderer, a sith, and still his brother . Obi wan chooses to go alone to face him ….

{that one deleted scene }

The deul with anakin is the worst moment of his life. Nothing compares to it . He tries to enter with an open mind and the little voice in the back of his mind telling him to redeem anakin . Sadly hes to far gone. The deul ends with his dying friend near the fire , obi wans whole life in pieces and a almost death padme.

The birth of Luke and leia is a small piece of hope, but padmé passes away . Obi wan has no one anymore.

He's extremely happy with the organas asking to adopt leia, and he himself asks to adopt Luke, but that did not happen because of the circumstances. If the sith starts hunting jedi , Obi wan will be at the top of the list

In the end, he lives near Luke until he grows to be a jedi .

He tries to meditate, but his bond to the force is pretty much broken .

Part 4: obi wan alone

Since moving to Tatooine, he has got some new dreams . He gets flashbacks to his childhood before being a jedi, but the worst once are the anakin once . They all start the same , meeting ani quick flashes through their years together and then Mustafar .

He believes that he killed anakin and that he burnt to death .

He has mixed feelings towards his actions. On the one hand, he as a jedi had to kill him, but as his brother, he is simply broken.

He doesn’t think of himself as a jedi anymore. Over the years, he has come to question the jedi order . For how they treated anakin and ahsoka even padme . He promised to himself that he wouldn’t teach Luke to throw away his emotions.

When darth maul shows up on tattooin, he's in some strange way. Sorry for him . They were both just children raised for war , he wished partly that they could have got Maul out before Naboo or that he wouldn’t hold the anger he had towards him for the death of his father . He took a deep breath and let it go . In the end, Maul died in his arms , the same way he had hoped he would have pulled anakin up after their duel.

He tries to meditate again in hopes of connecting to qui gons' spirit or anakins . He hopes to apologise to anakin to pet his hair and tell him it's alright to get one last evening diner with padmé and Anakin . From qui gon, he just wants comfort a long hug or a smile that shows him he’s proud of his padawan, even a home cooked meal .

He starts working as a butcher for sand whales . In the beginning, he used to walk there, but then lars pointed out that that was really suspicious for the other people in town . So he went shopping for a transport that was nice and easy to maintain . That's how he ends up with his eopie Akkani .

Akkani is a bit of a lazy animal , she just wants to eat and walk and eat again. He's happy he has a pet, tho because he gets a bit lonely.

He keeps all of his jedi things in a chest in his gave , including his own lightsaber and 2 sets of beads . One set is his own padawan braid beads, and the other are anakins . He also has some other stuff such as qui gon' s old kitchen knife and some pictures of his clones scrabs of r2d2 when he needed repairs a feather of boga some model airplanes anakin used to play with and so on. ( NO BURYING IN THE DESSERT I HATE THAT)

He really wants to train Luke, but Lars won’t let him . Which hurts obi Wan a lot . He wouldn’t push Luke to be a soldier like the once before , he would connect him to the force just like qui gon wanted with Anakin .

That's why he started reading up on the ancient scripts about the jedi . He loves the Yawa sellers just because he can buy his books without the empire noticing.

He will wait forever in hopes of setting the universe back to balance for the mistake he made on Mustafar.

This took so long and its not even all of it .( i left out the kenobi series because i didn’t want to rewrite it and i couldn’t figure out how to add to it without rewriting it srry)

Also i wrote a little obi wan reacting to ahsoka being Anakins padawn not that long ago ( link below )

And i left his later relationship with satine and maul out because it might be a bit long . If you want that you can always ask in my requests ( i do have some thoughts about those)

{masterlist}

[starzshopoflove]

But did he ever make you cry? (Johnny "Soap" Mactavish x Reader)

Notes: fem reader! sfw, literally just me projecting onto reader, best friend Soap! Pining!! Hurt/comfort! I'll make this a series if you guys like it (WC: 1.7)

(Pov first person in italics) 

God when is this gonna be fucking over 

I’ve been here for what? 4 hours? He just keeps going on and on and on about his ex and “How crazy she was”. When was the last time he asked me something, feels like I'm sitting here for decoration. If he wanted to talk about another girl he could have found a therapist or something, Jesus.

This might be up there in the top 10 worst dates, maybe after that freak who got up in my ear after coffee asking if I wanted to go back to his place. Am I cursed?? What is it about me and attracting these absolute losers? 

Its been a while since you’ve gone out a bit rough around the edges since your last breakup. Sure the relationship wasn't that serious but it still bothered you that he left because “You weren't putting out enough” after he said it was fine that you wanted to take things slow. You got your hopes up a bit too high after this guy (absolute fuckin DWEEB) in your lecture asked if you could grab dinner together. You just wasted a solid 2 hours picking out a cute little skirt and doing your makeup checking twice to make sure you looked nothing less then too the 9’s. 

And then he shows up in a baggy pair of khaki joggers and hoodie, y'know after he said “Get pretty I’ll take you somewhere nice”. Oh but of course he just “accidentally” forgot the reservations but that's fine he knows a great place nearby. The great place being a diner in the middle of a highway rest with fluorescent lights that flickered too often with a weird smell in the air. 

His table manners were practically non-existent smacking his lips when he chewed, sucking on his fingers and getting ketchup on his face. That sight alone made you put down your fork that barely poked at your clearly reheat mush they insisted was a pasta dish. Oh and he wouldn’t stop fucking talking, honestly you were starting to question how it was possible he hadnt choked on his food when he spoke. 

You need to get out now. Any Longer at this table and your dignity might start slipping away. He yapped on about whatever as you tuned it out, nodding your head like you cared slowly tucking your phone back into your purse and pulling it onto your shoulder. You were already drawing up a game plan in your head, bathroom, call your roommate, tell her to come get you and block his number. Perfectly full proof. 

“You mind if I slip out for a moment? I gotta head to the bathroom, won't be long promise.” 

You slapped on a fake smile as he shot you a nod with a sleezy grin, all your senses pulled you back into reality as you felt disgust pool in your gut at the sight of him noticing more off putting things about the longer you looked. You platforms clicked as you pattered off into the one stall bathroom, you stood up straight inside not wanting to lean on the wall when you noticed the dried piss stains and mysterious gunk smeared on it.

It was suffocating, every second of it. The smell, The lights, the noise and of course him. You felt insulted, was this really the kind of place you deserved to be taken out too? You don't get to be wined and dined every now and then do you? Even after you spend days in class or at work and heaving your bones to the campus library to study for the hundreds of tests your professors insist on giving you. 

You let out a sigh of contempt digging through your purse shoving the ugly rearing head of disappointment back as you pulled out your phone. Scrolling through the contact list to find your roommates number chewing on your thumbnail as you brought your phone up to your ear letting it ring, feeling your heart pound further the longer the phone rang. You but down hard once you heard the automated message trill, a heavy sigh leaving your chest as you slumped against the wall of your stall running a hand through your hair. 

What the fuck am I gonna do, I can’t stay here any longer or i’m not gonna be held responsible for whatever happens to him if he brings up how much he loves blondes again.

You swallowed your pride unlocking your phone again scrolling up your contact list hoping he wouldn’t be too mad at having to save you from this god awful excuse for a date as you eyes settled on his number 

“Johnny 🧼” 

You thumb pressed down on the number bringing your shakey hand back up to your ear, the pressure that was just annoying you got heavier on your chest the longer you thought about having to stay here with him. You might burst into tears if you had to stay another hour and listen to this loser describe how much he likes girls that are the exact opposite of you basically holding you hostage to listen on this “date” 

The ringing stopped when a sigh on the other end of the line broke the silence 

“Ello?” 

You felt the pressure on your chest bubble and pop once you heard his voice, your own cracking a little as you spoke up. Yeah it was embarrassing to cry over the phone but it would be more embarrassing to sit there and finish the date with red eyes. 

“Johnny,, please tell me your not busy right now” 

“Can’t be busy when yer asleep” 

Your voice was shaky which chilled his nerves with worry, you don’t call him at night unless it was an emergency and with the way you sounded all he could do was think the worst 

“What’s wrong bonnie”

It was more of a hushed gentle voice than any annoyance you anticipated, he couldn’t see it but you were already bleary eyed and pouting over the line. 

You sat down closing the toilet lid as another shakey sigh let you while the seat creaked under you. You felt you words choke up in your throat pressing heavy on your sternum. You wanted to explain yourself, tell him how horrible your date went, how you felt stupid for going out with him, and how sorry you are for bothering him at night knowing he just got back from a mission only a few days ago.

“Talk to me bonnie, can’t help if you dinnae tell me” 

“Can you come get me, ‘m sorry” 

Barely a whisper over the phone, Johnny was already imagining the worst when you asked him that. You could hear him shuffling around the room already pressing his phone between his shoulder and ear. In his head you were already kidnapped locked away in some cellar ready to be shipped away, when you were just sniffling and tearing up in a shitty diner bathroom. 

“You ok? nbody hurtin you?” 

You could hear him tugging his heavy boots on, finally letting out a breath you were suffocating to hold knowing you’d finally get out of here 

“No ‘m just not having a good time please, i’ll tell you when your here.” 

Johnny looked down hearing his phone ping with the location hushing your sniffling through the line as he opened up the map shutting his front door and quickly sliding into his pick up. 

__________________________________

The wait felt like forever, it wasn’t of course you watched the clock religiously. 8 minutes, Johnny sped across town in 8 minutes for you, probably breaking a few laws he’d wave away once he got here. 

He walked into the diner seeing it empty, your date no where to be seen while he took in the atmosphere. It was disgusting, and all he could think about was how you got here and why you would ever be here heavily sighing as he paced over knocking on the bathroom door leaning slightly against the door as he waited for your response or even just a sound. 

“Steamin Jesus,, lovie you in here?” 

He could hear shuffling on the other side as you opened the door up looking up at him with a pouted face and flushed face trying to hold back any noise or tears not wanting to cry in front of him. His hand slowly went to the small of your back gently rubbing and guiding you away from the loo. 

“What you doin out ‘ere alone bunny?” 

His voice was low as he mumbled down to you softly, face screwed and eyebrows furrowed while he peered down at you spinning your head around the small dinner seeing your abandoned table and spotting a napkin with writing on it. 

You moved over to the table reading the napkins silently 

“Tif called, had a good time with you, sorry this didn’t work out!”

He left. He asked you out and left you abandoned in the middle of a dinner after trying to feed you shitty food. He asked you out and thought it was fine to treat you like this. This was the straw that broke your back crumpling the napkin under your hand as you pressed your palms on the table hanging your head, you’ve already embarrassed yourself enough what’s the worst some crying can do. 

Johnny watching you crumble felt like a punch to his gut knocking all the air out of his lungs, He moves your hand off the napkin reading it and turning his head to you. Your hands already found your face hiding your shame as you stifled your sobs and swallowed thickly at the fat tears pouring down your face. He could be angry later when he finally got his hands on who ever hurt you 

He pulled your hands off your face, wrapping you in his arms one hand on the small of your back, another petting at your hair, hushing you softly as you slid your hands up to cling at his shirt burying your face into his chest shaking and heaving as you tried not to be loud. He petted at your hair, rocking you gently holding you close tucking your head under his chin as he slowly turned back to sit down in the booth tugging you down to his lap letting you curl up in on him again letting you cry to him as he coo’d to you 

“Shh poor darling girl, talk to me bonnie, breath ts ok ‘m here for ye” 

[itz-pandora]

Urrgh

I was just kinda moody today and yesterday and I think I'm just. Stressed.

I keep feeling like I have a mountain of work that I can't get done because I can't focus on anything but art at home, so I'd have to stay after school to get anything done, but I stayed after for like 3 days and I hardly got anything done and I'm so upset about it. I feel like I can't get anything done in the timeframe I have and I can't even focus in class and get things done. I just feel like I'm falling more and more behind and it's all my fault that I can't catch up. I'm trying so hard.

I have 4 different comics/storybooks I need to make for class and they ALL demand some kind of quality and I am a perfectionist. And I hate it. I think it won't take long but it does! I feel like if I don't turn in something that looks good then I'm not really an artist. Not to mention finding inspiration and time! I am dedicating so much to my Unbreakable Bond comic for my class, and I'm already 8 hours into 3 pages of SKETCHES! Just. Sketches. And I feel like I need them to be perfect. I need to make 2 short books based off stories (3 little pigs and Juan Bobo) and dude I can't think of inspo... Ughhhhhhh I'm sad. I'm halfway done with a storyboard for my Spanish class tho... Urrgh perfectionism is a bitch

And I'm falling behind with normal assignments too! I have a month old PowerPoint that every time I think about I feel drained and I DONT KNOW WHY? why cant i make a stupid powerpoint on one of the 5 senses development in utero?? It was due over a month ago! And we're in the story unit in Spanish and my dumbass can't keep up with our pace and it's driving me CRAZY. I'm supposed to be fast with this, I've always been fast with this, how am I falling so far behind?? It takes so long for me to get through it and we keep moving on before I'm ready. And my graphic noveling class? I spend so much time on the actual projects that I neglect the busywork. Not to mention how my brain doesn't think the same way as the curriculum does, I like to plot out as I go! It keeps telling me to plot out with words, but I know the gist of what I want, it's just hard to translate into words and I don't know how to properly describe stuff. Also I straight up didn't start one of our first assignments because I can't flip images on our school computers and it made me mad

Thank you Earth Science for being NORMAL. It's my most rigid and lecture-based class and has the most traditional style of teaching. It's the easiest in the execution and I don't feel like I'm behind in it. It's the only one I feel normal in.

My child development class is very lax, I goof off tbh, it's so easy to waste time. With Spanish, I need a translator and my friend in that class is chatty so I procrastinate, and in my Graphic noveling class, I make too much for myself and end up drowning in it.

i havent worked on my animatic since yesterday so that's another thing my brain put in the loser bin. Smh

I'm kinda sad

I'm not saying this in any negative way towards you guys, I'm glad when you interact with me. Doing things on here is actually such a mental boost

[finelinevogue]

love me tomorrow

summary - you and Harry are high-school teachers and he loves you. the only issue is; you're a married woman

warnings: domestic abuse/violence - both emotional and physical, swearing, it’s very much a hurt/comfort piece. this is pretty heavy going and i need you all to know that abuse isn't okay, and i hope that you reach out to people if you need to. if you ever need a simple friend, for literally whatever reason, i'm always here! xx

pairing: teacher!harry x teacher!reader

word count: +13.8k

Life had been good to you. For the most part.

Life had given you a wholesome family who supported your every choice - even the drastic ones like choosing to live in Namibia for a year. Life had given you an incredible education, leading you on to a fulfilling life of educating the new generations. Life had given you so much love. Life had given you a healthy body and mind which you'd always cherished, up until recently.

Finding 'the one' in your life isn't supposed to be an easy road, but you were challenged with the hardest of them all.

Rodger Cassidy. 

The name of the man who has made life feel meaningless and you feel worthless.

That night you believed you'd met your soulmate. 

That night you believed you'd met your soulmate. 

Until you realised you hadn't.

After two years of being together he popped the question - you thinking that he'd taken long enough. Now, though, maybe he hadn't.

Rodger, or Ro as you started to nickname him, was the sweetest. He always drove you to work and back. He always made you a coffee in the mornings. He always stayed up late if you were out with the girls. But then it all changed and you never understood why. Whether it was something creeping up on him from his past, the stresses of every day life or troubles with his family you just didn't know. All you knew it that you were the one he'd take his stress and anger out on at the end of the day.

The world had become a lot smaller since meeting Ro, both emotionally and physically. At first he stopped you from going abroad, saying that you didn't have the money to be wasting away on abroad luxuries anymore - but it was perfectly okay for him to be spending on gambling and alcohol instead. Then he cut you off from your friends and family, having texted them a long message explaining how they weren't suitable company anymore - but you were allowed to be friends with his druggie friends. Last, was not letting you out of the house unless he was with you or for work.

Never did you think that you would feel so trapped, but here you were.

Obviously you had put your foot down, each time, standing up for yourself and explaining that it wasn't okay to take away your freedom and your love like this. You'd even tried escaping one night through the window, to go to your best friends birthday party, but he caught you - explaining that if he ever found you leaving him again he'd kill you. Each time you would do something he didn't like, it would result in a beating - which is why you are very hypersensitive. 

It wasn't worth trying to be you anymore, you had to play by his rules now.

Your only chance of escape was work and it was the best 6 hours of your day.

Working at a primary school was the greatest decision of your life, even after marrying Ro. You'd worked there before marrying Ro and it was the one sense of normality that he let you keep from what you like to call your previous life.

The primary school had never been the end goal. You had really wanted to teach undergraduates at university, because your lectures at university were awful and you wanted to change the system. However, getting a job as a lecturer was a lot harder than you thought not having considered that you would need a PhD to do so. So primary school teaching it was and it was the best decision of your life.

You'd found an advert online for support staff at 'Snowdrops Primary School' and loved the sound of it. You instantly sent in your resume and within a week they'd gotten back to you, stating how impressed they'd been with your CV and wanted to call you in for a taster session. Upon arrival they had told you on the low that you'd already got the job, but that they had to ask you in for a taster session due to protocol. Engaging with the kids that day was a happiness that you'd never felt in your life. They were so care-free, yet so vulnerable, and you promised yourself that you'd help them become the best versions of themselves. At the end of the day you had a long meeting, which resulted in them congratulating you on your new job with them.

It still is the best thing to have happened to you. 

Getting to see your students grow every day, and at such a young age, was something very special to you. Knowing that they would go home feeling that little bit smarter was something you prided yourself on. Whether it be they'd learnt how to add four and two together, whether they'd successfully learnt how to spell their name or whether they'd managed to colour in a picture in between the lines, you were proud of all of them.

You taught a class of 14 and they were the best people in your life.

"You better be ready at 4:30pm Y/N. I'm going to be pissed if I have to come inside that stupid school and find you, again." Ro spat at you as he pulled up outside the school.

"O-okay." You answered quietly. 

Before you could open the door he grabbed your wrist tightly, making you wince at how harsh it was. You couldn't escape from his grip if you tried though, his hand being tighter than a leather belt.

"Really pissed, so i'd be careful if I were you." He threatened.

You really couldn't deal with him today.

Escaping the car as quickly as possible you made your way swiftly in to the building. As you passed students you would say hello and good mornings, just as they would to you. Your class' students were already sat at their desks waiting for you, greeting you with a chorus of mornings as you said hello to them all.

The day went quite well actually, considering the awful morning you'd had. Rodger had "accidentally" pushed you down the last few stairs, making you land on your ankle in a, not so, funny way and bruising the entirety of your hip. It was as if someone had got purple paint and splatted it all over your left side. It hurt to sit down for reasons you didn't understand and then stand back up - so you did a lot of your teaching standing up today.

Luckily for you, you'd gotten quite good at hiding the pain over the years and so no one really questioned why there was an ever so slight limp in you left ankle, or why you kept on running a hand protectively over your left side.

On Friday's your class and Harry’s class would come together to do arts and crafts in the afternoon. Strictly, you weren't supposed to and instead were supposed to be coming together for additional maths or english lessons, but you and Harry thought that was a bit harsh on a Friday afternoon. After much persuasion you and Harry, collaboratively, managed to convince the head teacher to let the children's creativity flow instead hence creating an artistry period.

Harry’s students were a mixed class too, but his class were a little more rowdy than yours which you suspected had something to do with Harrys extroverted personality, compared to your introverted one. Your class were a lot more tranquil, but you weren't complaining. 

They were your calm away from the storm.

This particular afternoon you had asked the kids to make an artefact for someone that meant a lot to them. Some inspiration you'd given was perhaps a card for your mum or maybe a name badge for a pet. It could be anything. Then on Monday, after they'd given their artefact to whoever, they would write a sentence or two about the reaction of the gift receiver.

You were currently sat with Hallie, one of your quietest students, and one whom you saw yourself in, working on her artefact. You were surprised when she'd asked whether she was allowed to make an artefact for Harry, or Mr Styles to her, but you told her as long as she gave it to him with a good enough reason then there was no problem there.

"What are you two mischiefs up to?" Harry asked, coming to sit down on the chair opposite you both, whilst you two continued to giggle.

"No Mr Styles! You can't see. Mrs Cassidy and I are painting for you." Hallie exclaimed, covering her little arms over the art that you'd been working on. Harry leant back against the chair, arms up in defence and looked at you instead of Hallie and her present.

"Sorry! Sorry Hallie. You both painted it though? For me?" Harry smirked, knowing he would tease you for this later - or maybe not when he finds out what it is. You squinted your eyes at him, already knowing his devious plot against you. You knew him too well for him to let this go.

"Yes, Mr Styles." Hallie nodded her head, glancing upwards to make sure Harry wasn't cheating. She looked up to see him watching you instead, noticing the sparkle in his eyes she saw in her own mum and dads. "It was Mrs Cassidy's idea to paint it, otherwise it would still be not colourful." She added, picking up a different paintbrush to use a different colour. Her grammar wasn't technically correct, but you hadn't learnt about sentence structure yet so neither of you felt the need to correct her.

"Mrs Cassidy?" You heard Jada shout politely from the other side of the room. She had her hand patiently waiting in the air and you felt slightly guilty over how long she'd been sat there waiting for you. You had been too caught up with Harry that you didn't even notice.

"I'm coming Jada." You shouted back, not wanting to have the full conversation with her from opposite ends of the classroom. 

You got up from the chair you'd been sat in, wincing slightly from the shooting pain in your hip, and pointed you fore-fingers from your eyes to point at Harry, threatening him that you were watching him and that he better not try and persuade Hallie to show him his present if you weren't there. Harry held his hands up to you, which made you felt better about leaving. However, you didn't feel good about the concerned look in his eyes from when you'd stood up.

Jada put her hand down when you finally came over and started to help her with a glue problem she was having. Apparently Dennis, the boy sat next to her, and from Harry’s class no surprise, had glued her hands together for fun, but it had turned out to be stickier glue than they both expected. At least it wasn't superglue.

The class continued for an hour before you slowly wrapped up, letting some people showcase their artefacts. Dennis showed his name tag that he'd made for his pet fish, who was named after a certain clownfish from a beloved Disney movie - although it was written as the alternative spelling of 'Neemow'. Parker showed the snowflake that he'd made for his mum, with the help of Harry's cutting expertise.

It wasn't until after class, during the last recreational play time outside before the end of the day, that Hallie gave her artefact away.

"Mr Styles?" Hallie asked, holding her piece of art behind her back. You and Harry were tidying away the trays of colouring pencils, pens, glues and scissors back in to their assigned drawers.

"Hello Hallie." Harry stopped what he was doing and crouched down, seeing as he was a lot taller than her. He knew she had something to give her, since she'd been antsy about him seeing her art all afternoon.

"My gift is to you." She told him, swaying on the balls of her feet in nervous anticipation.

You watched the two interact as you filed away the paper into the correct trays, pushing the chairs firmly under the tables as you did so.

"Well thank you." Harry said gratefully, before even receiving it. Even if you didn't understand the reasoning behind the piece of art Hallie had created, you did know that Harry would get emotional over it.

Hallie cautiously moved her arms around front and presented her small token to Harry. She looked at him carefully, studying every facial expression carefully to see how well she'd done - or how badly. Harry was taken aback by the small, yet significant, gesture. It shouldn't have made Harry feel the way it did, but he could feel the tears starting to form in his eyes.

It was a medal.

Not just any medal though. Not a 'Number 1 teacher' or anything like that. It was a medal that had come from the heart. It was a 'You're my hero' medal. Harry didn't quite understand what he'd done to deserve such a thing, but he definitely thought it was the sweetest thing he'd received in a long time. He never expected to create such an impression on a student - especially one that he didn't even specifically teach.

"Do you like it?" Hallie asked, needing some sort of validation to know that her efforts weren't all for nothing. You knew that even if it were the ugliest looking thing in the world Harry would love it all the same. He would never have a bad word to say.

"Hallie I love it. Thank you, but what is it for?" He asked, making you listen extra carefully to her next words.

"Well it says you're my hero, because you made Mrs Cassidy smile the other day when she was upset." 

Hallie's words made you freeze. You, thankfully, weren't holding anything to drop on the floor to create a ruckus. You were shocked, completely. You were glad you didn't have to say anything to her right now because your whole mind had shut down.

It baffled you that a girl of five years old could tell that you were upset. You had been upset, but you didn't realise it was that obvious. You started to feel a little guilty for making Hallie witness your dark moments. What made up for it was the fact that she'd noticed that Harry was there to make you feel better. She did the thanking on behalf of you both. Technically she had said that it was being made from both of you, but you never knew you were helping because of that reasoning.

This was hitting you hard.

"Wow. That's very kind of you. I'll keep it with me always." Harry promised.

"Thanks Mr Styles." You wanted to believe that she was thanking him in reply to his words, but you felt that she was thanking him on a deeper level - as if thanking him for making you smile.

More of the conversation occurred between them, but you were too lost in your own mind to hear them. You'd stopped putting away the equipment and were instead staring outside, looking up at the darkening clouds.

"You okay?" You hear Harry’s voice swoon around you. You looked to the side of you and gave him a half-hearted smile, nodding your head since no words were able to form yet. "Hey, you can smile better than that. I would know." He proudly held up the medal for you to see, which made you genuinely laugh. "Didn't get this medal for nothing, Y/N/N."

You smiled to yourself, knowing you were beyond blessed to have this man in your life.

•••••

Life wasn't so blessed at home, however.

Luckily for you, you'd made it on time to meet Rodger, but unluckily it still didn't mean you were in the clear tonight.

Tonight was game night, which was the worst. Rodger would be always watch the footie with a bottle of beer, or seven, in one hand and a blunt in the other. These were some of the worst nights, because all the drugs and alcohol he took would never hit him until later on in the evening and that's when his rough side came out.

You wished you could prevent the inevitable, but it was just impossible.

Rodger had removed all the locks from the doors, bar the front door and back door, so you couldn't blockade him from you. You did that once, locking yourself in the bathroom, but when he broke down the door and found you in the bathtub he punched you so hard you passed out - you didn't wake until 14 hours later. He hadn't even taken you to hospital.

There were times, one game night, where his mates would come around. When that was the case you were absolutely degraded. He made you wear short, and tight, skirts, along with crop tops that were just exposed for too much, and serve them all beers and cigarettes throughout the evening. If you were well behaved, which had only happened once, then he let you go to bed early, otherwise he would openly hit you in-front of his friends. You thought that one of them might've helped, but they all just laughed - or joined in. It was those times when you wished you were never born.

He is nothing more than a monster.

"Y/N?" You heard Rodger shout from down the corridor. "Y/N!" He shouted louder, not even giving you two seconds before replying.

"Coming." You calmly replied back. You'd learnt that if you shouted back then it would make everything so much worse. One time, because he knew you were just taking the hits and not fighting back he got bored and let you be for the rest of the evening - he made up for the lack of abuse the next day though.

You walked down the hallway, a fresh cold beer in hand, and in to the lounge. He was sat, in the scruffiest of clothes and untidied beard, in his usual chair watching Tottenham play Sheffield United. He didn't even support either team so you didn't understand why he had to watch it - especially if it made his anger worse.

"Fucking took your time." Was his response for you giving him his new beer. No thanks given.

You're welcome, honey.

"Sorry, it won't happen again." You apologised, leaving your head to hang low. He hated when you looked at him if he wasn't speaking directly to you - something about you gross eyes staining his image. "Anything else?" You asked, just wanting to leave.

"Yeah, actually. You're staying home next Monday because the lads and I are watching the Seven Nations." He told you without a care in the world for your schedule. Did he realise you were holding down a full-time job as a teacher, which meant you worked on the weekdays?

"But i'm working then?" You questioned, thinking that maybe he'd meant to say Sunday instead - well more like hoping.

"Well you're fucking not." He dumbly said in reply.

"Ro, I have a full-time job. Can't you find someone else?" You offered, slightly annoyed that you were going to have to take time off work just to be humiliated in front of his loser friends. It just wasn't fair. You wanted to be in school, safe, with your wonderful students and your amazing co-staff (but mainly Harry).

"Are you fucking saying no to me?" Rodger asked, pausing the game to look up at you. Oh, this wasn't good. Nice going, Y/N...

"No, well, I mean—" You didn't know what to say to make this situation better, but you only knew of one way this night was ending.

"You said no. Didn't you?," He tauntingly asked, "and don't lie to me, bitch." He gritted through his teeth making your heart beat faster with anxiety. You really didn't have a way out of this tonight. Sometimes, as gross and disgusting as it was and made you feel, you could persuade him over with sex, but it was a last resort in case you felt like you were on the verge of passing out. You knew that using your body like that was wrong, but sometimes it was the only way of making him stop.

"Sorry, Ro." You quietly speak.

"Sorry? You're fucking sorry? No you aren't, but you will be." He stood up from his chair and made his way over to you. You backed up a bit before getting pulled back to Rodger with his strong grip. You let out a gasp as he pulled you, feeling very manhandled - literally.

"I am Ro, I am." You pleaded, knowing that you would be sore tomorrow. Before you could protest anymore a deafening strike sounded and it only took seconds for the stinging in your cheek to strengthen, and become excruciatingly painful. You wanted to cry but you knew this wouldn't be the worst of your evening and thought it would be easier if you cried later, knowing Ro would only go harder if he saw the pain he was causing.

"Shut the hell up and stay fucking quiet." He awarded you with another hit to the same spot he had only done a minute ago - but harder. This bruise would be a hard one to clean and cover up.

You don't remember how much longer he carried on for, but he didn't stop until you'd collapsed to the floor begging him to stop. You were so tired and exhausted that you got the point where you couldn't even physically beg him to stop.

At the end of the night you ended up with a bleeding and bruised cheek, a possible broken rib and no more tears left to cry, with hopes that things may get better soon.

•••••

Two weeks later, and a little more black and blue, it was another Friday.

Fridays were always your favourite, not necessarily because you had the weekend within reach but because your class and Harrys class got to mix - meaning you got to see Harry without excuse.

This Friday you had been learning a bit of music. Harry thought that the creative arts worked hand in hand with music, as it was often the inspiration for a lot of famous pieces, and brought it onto the curriculum. The children got to mess around with triangles, ukuleles, bongos and recorders, however you took the recorders away when you soon realised you would rather be deaf than listen to them play any more.

Bless them for trying, but no.

It was coming towards the end of the session now and the students were starting to become tireder, which is exactly what you'd expect towards the end of the day. They were all sat quietly at the front of the room, on the carpeted floor, waiting for further instructions from their teachers. It was nice to see them sat with people across classes, because it meant that they were sociable and weren't sticking to people who they were comfortable and familiar with.

Hallie was sat with Henry, who was from Harrys class. They kind of reminded you of you and Harry -  Hallie being the quiet introvert and Henry being the loving extrovert. They got along well and you wouldn't be surprised if they end up in a 'best-friends-since-childhoood' relationship when they grow up.

As you finished collecting in the last of the sheet music that you'd been practicing off you noticed someones hand go up from the corner of your eye. Harry seemed to have it under control, however.

"Yes, Dora. What can I do for you?" He asked, which enabled to put her hand back down. Dora was from his class.

"Mr Styles? Do you think you could play the guitar for us?" Dora asked politely. Before Harry could answer there was a sweet chorus of gasps and agreements from all of the children - even Hallie.

"Oh I don't know." Harry brushed it off, feeling slightly self conscious to play in front of you. You knew that he could play the guitar, because you saw him often transferring it from his car to his classroom. You would be strongly lying if you said you didn't dream about him playing the guitar for you. You could only imagine the angelic voice he had too.

"Please Mr Styles." Dora encouraged him, using her best puppy-dog eyes to persuade him.

"Yeah, go on Mr Styles." You chimed in, surprising Harry. He smirked and shook his head at you, pretending to give you the evil eyes. You knew that with you joining in he would definitely play for you all.

"Oh alright then." Harry huffed as if it was a chore, but you knew that we was very excited to be playing for you all - especially you. He picked up his guitar and threaded his head through the guitar strap - the same one he'd painted in a Friday afternoon art class once. The back of his guitar was covered in artistic stickers that his class had designed, but if you looked closely you would see your name amongst them - engraved by using a threading needle. He'd told you he wanted your name more permanent than everyone elses'.

He strummed once or twice before turning to Dora.

"What would you like me to play, Dora, since you asked for this?" He asked. You knew Harry was musically gifted and it wouldn't take him long to figure out the chords for any song. He loved playing anything by The Beatles, that much you knew, but you were sure he'd give anything a go if he tried hard enough.

"Um.." Dora looked up to the ceiling as if it would give her inspiration, before answering, "I like that one you performed the other day." She vaguely answered.

"Do you remember what is was called?" Harry asked, tuning his guitar whilst he waited patiently.

"I think it was called 'hello there delly-a'." She answered, which caused Harry to look at her with confusion. He was normally good at interpreting what children meant when they didn't really know how to say things, but this was out of his expertise.

"Erm—" Harry got tongue tied over his words.

"Do you mean 'Hey There Delilah', Dora?" You stepped in for Harry, after silently chuckling at how lost he'd looked.

"Yes, yes, please." Dora excitedly nodded her head at you, before turning back to face Harry expectantly.

"Oh okay." Harrys face was one of sudden realisation, winking at you in thanks for helping, before he started playing the infamous melody. "Hey there Delilah, what's it like in New York City..."

•••••

For the longest time all you could think about was the dreams of becoming a dancer.

You had ballet and tap classes when you were little, probably up until you were twelve years old, and then you decided it was uncool to dance anymore and so quit. You were really good though, so it was stupid of you to have quit. It didn't matter though because Rodger would've just made you quit anyways.

That's why on another particular, late, Friday afternoon you found yourself on the green roof of the school. Up here was your safe space - where you knew you were out of reach from Rodger, but also away from the watching eyes of staff and students.

It was a place to feel free.

You took care of the plants up here for the caretaker, Mike, knowing he had enough on his hands already than to take extra care of these greens. It was a personal garden of eden paradise up here. You were very proud of it. You'd come up here, this afternoon, to water the plants, but the rain showers had decided that they'd do it for you today - not that you were complaining because it saved you a job.

You were under a small sheltered area of the roofed area, attending to your nursery of baby plants, containing sunflowers, roses and tulips to name but a few, on the other side of the roof to the door. You had The 1975s music playing in the background, wanting to fill the void of emptiness with soul-filling music. It had started to rain when you were on the other side of the roof and now you were contemplating waiting the rain out. You did have to be downstairs in time for Rodger to pick you up though, otherwise it wouldn't end well.

"Y/N?" You heard your name called across the roof and you had to squint a bit to see who it was through the pellets of rain.

"Harry?" You asked back, checking it was him and your eyes weren't deceiving him.

"What are you doing out here?" He shouted, from where he was stood protected under the frame of the door. He had his arm over his eyes to stop the rain from blowing in to them.

"Gardening." You replied.

"Of course you are." Harry muttered under his breath, but you swore you heard every syllable as it was carried in the wind.

"Come look." You gestured your arm for him to come and have a look at your babies. You plants were currently fertilising and producing their own children, and you though there was something so organically beautiful about watching it. They were so delicate, yet so clever - which you felt resembled you in way and Harry would strongly agree.

Harry ran over to you, not taking a second to question how drenched he was about to become. If it meant he got to spend some extra time with you, putting an extra smile on your face then he would run in the rain all of the time. He felt blessed to have moments like this with you.

"I can't believe I just ran through the bastard rain just to see your plants." Harry rolled his eyes when he was next to you.

"Well thank you, I guess." You laughed, taking in his drowned rat appearance. He pulled it off nicely actually.

"Yeah, too right." Harry sarcastically added, making you sport a harmless smile.

The music cut to the next song and you instantly gasped. It was your favourite song of all time. It was a very sad song, but one that you related to on a lot of levels. You felt as if the musician was speaking out to you solely, which is why it was crowned your number one.

The Most Beautiful Things - Tenille Townes

You didn't say anything but just grabbed Harry's hand and ran out into the rain with him.

"Y/N? What the fu—"

"Oh shut up and live a little Harry." You told him off, not wanting him to ruin this moment with his wingeing. You kept ahold of his hand and pulled him closer than you both thought professional. His chest was touching yours and you could hear his heart beat through his chest.

"What are you up to?" Harry asked, absolutely soaked through from the rain now. No doubt you looked even worse than him because of your longer hair.

"We're going to dance." You proudly stated, the raindrops coating your eyelids.

"Oh I don't think so." Harry attempted to pull away but not so hard that he'd pull you over with him. Part of him didn't pull too hard, as well, because he wanted to dance and embarrass himself in front of you. He knew of your passion for dance and anything that he did was going to be shameful compared to you.

"Just come here. I'll lead. It'll be fine." You assured him, knowing that everyone had a little rhythm in them somewhere. He was a musician, also, so surely he knew how to feel the beat and go with the flow.

He was a terrible dancer.

You'd seen bad dancers and then there was Harry. He had two left feet, no doubt about it, but he tried bless him. Normally it was custom for the gentleman to lead the woman, but this time it was the other way round. You didn't mind and Harry didn't either. He was enjoying being near you, whilst he watched you enjoy yourself dancing.

The waltz wasn't an easy dance, but you'd never met someone who couldn't get the hang of it as much as Harry didn't. It was endearing, really.

"I haven't danced in so long, this is amazing!" You laughed, swallowing down some raindrops as you spoke.

"I'm glad you're enjoying yourself - even if I have probably broken just about every bone in your foot." Harry was laughing because you were, feeling terribly awful for stepping on your feet so much. A few minor bruises were, wrongly, not that important nowadays.

"No you haven't," you rolled your eyes before smirking, "you've just broken the left ones." You cleverly replied, knowing that he'd been stepping on your left foot more than your right.

"Oh god, don't tell me that." He shook his head, feeling even worse than he had before - although he knew that you were only messing with him he still couldn't help but feel bad. Maybe he should offer you some ice for your feet?

"Just need a bit more practice, that's all." You tell him, after coughing from a mouthful of accidental rainwater.

"Well I already have a good teacher." Harry was quick to respond, and if you knew better you would've caught on that he was flirting with you. You missed his subtle hint at a second, or even a third, dance lesson with you, but he wasn't too disheartened because he knew you were just that blindingly oblivious.

You looked up at him in awe of his words. It meant a lot to you to be told you were a good teacher, because that in turn meant you were a good dancer. You were looking deep in to Harrys eyes, finding them the most beautiful emerald gems that you'd ever had the pleasure of seeing. Rodgers were supposed to be green, but you never saw them for anything other than a terrifying black so it was nice to see the green again - even it was on someone different. Harry's shone brighter than Rodger's ever could. The rain trickling over his eye lids helped reflect that jade green that you were so infatuated with.

His lips were so entrancing.

You took your eyes off his hypnotic eyes for only a second to look at his lips, and now you couldn't look away. They were like a drug. They looked liked the softest, most sweetest tasting, lips you'd ever been lucky enough to see. You leant in slowly, his lips having an invisible magnetic pull on them that you couldn't escape. You were so close that you could taste his minty breath on the tips of your tastebuds. You couldn't care less about Rodger in that moment, knowing he would never know, but you did care about Harry.

You cared for him a lot, which is why after ghosting his lips for a little while you were thankful that your phone vibrated in your pocket. You closed your eyes in regret of not taking it any further with Harry, but knowing it was the right thing to do. Wasn't it?

"Excuse me a moment." You felt guilty for cutting Harry off mid-dance, and near-kiss, even though he said that is was perfectly fine, still standing amidst the torrential rain, but this was probably important. In fact you knew it was important, because the only contact on your phone was Rodger. You took it out and read it carefully.

Rodger: Going to the pub now. Get ready for it bad later.

You cursed yourself for being so stupid. This morning Rodger had threatened you, again, that he wouldn't go easy on you if you were later - and now that's exactly what you were. How had you let yourself so carelessly slip up? Of course you wouldn't have changed a moment of what just happened with Harry, even if it meant your abuse would be less. The time spent with Harry was something you really cherished and you weren't willing to give up your source of happiness just yet.

"What is it? Everything okay?" Harry asked, noticing how your face had paled since reading your phone.

"Just my husband telling me he's coming home soon. I should probably get going." You told Harry, feeling bad that you were just leaving him after such a wonderful afternoon. He made you feel alive through the dark days. He brought light to the endlessly inky tunnel. He added that bit of sparkle in your monotonous life.

"Oh, yeah, no problem." Harry nodded, standing back to create a bit of distance between you. The air felt a bit thicker from the tension that both of you were creating.

"Thanks for dancing with me, Harry." You genuinely smiled at him, because he had managed to make you feel carefree for the first time in a long while. It was rare nowadays for you to have a joyous moment in your life, but instead it was filled with fists to the jaw, scratches to the skin and kicks to the gut.

"Thanks for the dance lesson." He responded, laughing as he remembered how terribly he had just danced. You were surprised he hadn't broken and ankle or a wrist with the way he had been moving his limbs. He was like an elegant spider, is the best way you could describe it.

"Rain-check?" You asked mischievously, looking down at your soaked through sun-dress.

"Think it's a little late for that now, love." Harry let out a bellowing laugh as you had spoken, before answering with his own witty comeback.

"At least you aren't walking home in it." You joked, holding open the door for him to let you both back inside the building. You didn't expect him to be so closely following, but it felt nice. Rodger, although being physically close to you when he was mistreating you, never was actually close to you. He never hugged you. He never held you close at night. He was just there. Having Harry so close to you, in an affectionate way, was a warm feeling that you wished could last forever.

"Hold on. You're walking home in this?" Harry stopped you suddenly by grabbing lightly on your arm. He had placed his hand so tactically though. He had placed it between two, rather large, bruises on your upper arm. You didn't understand how he'd missed both of them, but he had. Even when he held you though, it was very soft that it wouldn't be leaving any marks of his own.

"Don't remind me! But yes." You answered, rolling your eyes to the heavens for letting your days always turning out the worst.

"Absolutely not." Harry scrunched his face up in disgust.

"W-what?" You stuttered, thinking you'd made him angry and your mind automatically working out the worst situation that could happen here. You were pissed at yourself for even thinking that Harry would harm you in such a way, but it was unfortunately just how your mind was wired now.

"I'm going to drive you home. I'm not letting you walk home in these showers - no way." He commented. pointing to the window where you could barely see 10 metres because of how heavy the rain was. You were about to argue with him about how you would be "fine", but he beat you to it. "And i'm not taking no for an answer."

He smugly walked off towards the teachers staff room. You were left stunned for a moment before realising that he'd been so kind to offer you a ride home. You ran down the corridor, trying to catch up with him, before accidentally slipping from your wet heels and going flying down on to the floor. It shocked you at first, rolling on to your side to groan to try and ease the winded parts of your body.

Harry must've heard you thump on the floor because you could hear his shoes running back to you, whilst trying not to slip himself.

"Y/N!" He shouted, not being able to see your face to know if you were even conscious. You immediately felt his knees at your side, probably apprehensive of touching you incase you were severely hurt. "Y/N, shit, can you hear me? Y/N/N, hey?" You could hear the panic in your voice and you started to feel sorry for him.

That's when you rolled back onto your back laughing. You had been silently chuckling to yourself the entire time, finding the humour in such an embarrassing situation. Now you felt bad for Harry who had actually been concerned for you.

You couldn't stop laughing and Harry looked stunned.

"You little—" Harry started but never finished, wiping his top lip in frustration. When you didn't stop laughing though it began to become contagious and Harry was soon laughing too.

"I'm sorry!" You continued to laugh through your words.

"You're such an ass." Harry shook his head, holding out a hand for you to take in order to get you back to your feet.

"Yes, a definite bruised ass." You agreed, adding a compulsory, and very truthful, adjective in there. Harry didn't give you any visible sympathy, though, because he was pretending to be pissed off at you for pranking him. In reality you were too winded and caught up in the giggles to realise how concerned you'd made Harry.

"Well let's get you and your bruised ass home." He held onto your hand as he lead you down the hallway to get changed, before going to his car to head home.

•••••

After much deliberation on the way here, you'd decided that you were going to invite Harry to come inside. Your only problem was if Rodger came home early. You knew he would be at the pub right now, boozing himself up for later on when he comes home and treats you to his fist. If you ever accidentally missed his curfews or deadlines your punishment would ten times worse - and so with that thought in mind you needed someone to be with you right now.

Not just anyone though - just Harry.

"Please come in and try to make yourself as comfortable as possible." You say, knowing full well that it would be impossible for him to do so.

"Oh I don't need to intrude, Y/N. Just needed to make sure you got back okay." Harry spoke from outside your front door. His hands were stuffed in his pockets to keep them toasty warm from the cold - which wasn't helped by the fact you'd just danced in the rain. You could already see his little button nose turning pink from the icy weather.

"You're not intruding, Harry. In fact, I could do with the company right now." You kept latched to the door, not shutting it until he was inside your property. He could tell, from the shakiness of your voice, that you needed him and he was more than willing to be there for you.

It was very dark inside your house, only having one or two lights you could turn on because Rodger was very adamant on keeping the electricity bill low- mainly so he had money left over at the end of the month to pay for drugs or cigarettes. Alcohol he would just ask you for any money you had left in your purse. You wished you could use that money to spend on a dance class down the road, or even treat yourself to that pretty summer dress, but instead it was wasted on Jack Daniels or Disaronno.

"Your house is... sweet?" Harry asked rather than stated, as he made his way inside, making you laugh at him because you knew he was lying.

"It's a pig sty, Harry, is what you meant to say." You spoke for him, which earned a laugh back out of him.

"What?" Harry dragged out the word sarcastically, moving to follow you around the house. You stepped in to the lounge warily, just in case Rodger had decided to make a surprise appearance home. You let out a relieved sigh to not see him in his usual arm chair.

"Please." You pointed to one of the more comfortable sofas, not wanting him the displeasure of having him sit down where the springs would bounce beneath your bottom. They were so uncomfortable, but that's all you can afford when your monthly income is spent on illegal substances.

"Thanks." He smiled the best he could, given he was quite literally in the shittiest shithole to ever exist. From the outside he was prepared to be impressed, if not even a little jealous, but those were far from the feelings he was surrounded by right now. His main feelings were weighted towards his sorriness for you. You deserved so much more than this.

"Apologies for the exercise books everywhere." You were behind on marking the kids books, but you were planning on doing it later on tonight - after Rodger was done with you.

"I'm exactly the same, don't worry about it." He chuckled back.

After sitting in silence for a moment or two you noticed a small book in his pocket, only big enough to fit in there. It was tattered and had various drawings on the skin of it. He'd definitely had it a while and then some years. You wished that you'd kept a diary throughout your years, you'd be able to look back in the future and see whether life had changed. You hoped it would change, because you didn't think you had it in you to live many more years in this life.

"What's the notebook for?" You asked, trying to start up the conversation again.

"Oh... it's nothing." Harry fumbled to choose his words, which made you believe he was hiding something - a technique you were well aware of because you used it all the time. You'd hidden many things from Rodger using that technique.

"Harry," you gave him a sarcastic look, "come on." You laughed, not understanding what was so secretive about it. Maybe it was a book of his daily calorie intake? Maybe it was just a general diary? Maybe, but hopefully unlikely, it was a list of people he'd murdered? For someone who didn't watch the TV, you sure were paranoid of the fantasy malarky.

"Y/N honestly, it's nothing." Harry sighed, trying his hardest to shove it away so you'd have one less reason to think about.

"Harry. It seriously can't be that bad." You rolled your eyes at him to catch him gulp nervously. He looked like he'd seen a ghost, making you feel a lot more paranoid than you had been two seconds ago.

"You don't need to know what's in it." Harry explained cautiously, choosing his words carefully. His secrecy and closed off behaviour reminded you a lot of Rodger. Rodger would never give you a straight answer, and you were never allowed to know anything more than he let you. You didn't know anything more about his side of the family since you last saw them at your wedding. You knew nothing about the bills that were being paid for the house and taxes. Rodger was completely restrictive of the knowledge he gave you and you only prayed that Harry wouldn't be the same.

Harry was nothing like Rodger, though.

"No Harry. I-I want to know what's in it." You shakily pointed towards the little notebook, starting to tear up now, that he'd tried to stuff back in his pocket away from your view. "Please."

"Y/N I don't think that—" Harry tried to reason with you, but he knew better than for you to give up that easily. You were a fighter and that was something he greatly admired about you.

"Just l-let me see." You lurched across the sofa towards him and grabbed the little leather bound book from his pockets. He hadn't managed to push it all the way back in, so it made it easier for you to take. Technically this was stealing and invading someones privacy, but you had a gut feeling that the contents of the book had something to do with you. You didn't know whether that settled you or made you feel uneasy, but you were going to find out.

"Y/N—" Harry sighed, giving up on trying to fight against you.

It was time for you to know that he knew. It was time for this to end. It was time.

You sat in silence as you cautiously opened the book, undoing the small straw tie there was to open it. Your shaky hands stumbled upon opening it, making you drop it on to the floor and ended up with you mumbling an apology to Harry - something you knew was unnecessary but had gotten in to the habit of because of Rodger.

You turned to the first page and were met with something you were slightly taken aback by, not because it outrageous but because it was unexpected. Harry had kept the little medal that you, and Hallie, had drawn and coloured for him. The little badge that told him that he was both your heroes - well, he was definitely yours.

"You kept it?" You asked quietly, your tears falling more silently now, dumbfounded that he'd kept it.

"Of course I did. You told me I was your hero so obviously I had to keep the badge as proof." He smiled and spoke as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Then why is it in your notebook?" You asked, still in love with the fact he'd kept such, what you believed to be, and insignificant piece of coloured-in paper. You looked from the piece of paper to Harry, frowning when you noticed the sadness within his eyes.

"I use it as a bookmark." He gulped, making you feel heavy amount of nerves weigh on your shoulders.

"F-for what?" You hiccuped over your words. He didn't respond, letting you find out for yourself.

He looked down at the book and you could see tears start to form in his eyes. He looked scared, even more than you probably did, which worried you. You turned your watery eyes towards the notebook, preparing to turn the page. You let out a shaky breath and felt Harry move closer to you - your kneecap now touching his. The paper felt delicate between your fingers - kind of how you were feeling, as if you touched it too hard it would fall apart. Then you finally turned the page, letting a frown settle on your face as you read it to tried and understand.

Monday 9th January

You first read; the day in which you went back to school after the Christmas holidays.

•Limping - could be pulled muscle or maybe twisted ankle? •Slight bruising on lower forearm •Scratch on side of neck

It was beginning to make sense what Harry was keeping a note of.

•Sore throat - potentially from shouting?? •Total smiles = IIII.          

You couldn't read anymore because you had started sobbing without realising. Harry was keeping a check on how you were every day and every single thing he could pin down that was not okay with you. He wasn't picking out your physical flaws, but instead your physical mistreatment. He knew and you hadn't said anything to him. You'd only read one entry, but you were sure there was one for every day - including today. You needed to truly know.

"H-how many?" You choked out, your sobs coming out heavy and loud. You noticed how Harry was now cradling you, rocking you back and forth. Your mind was in so many places that you were having a hard time focusing in on what was presently happening around you.

You felt safe though. His arms made you feel protected, like if Rodger now walked through the door, which was still a possibility, you would be perfectly fine. For once, you felt safe in your own home and that feeling alone made you emotional. Not in years had you felt this way and you didn't want the feeling to ever go away.

"Y/N I—"

"Harry, p-please." You cut him off, not wanting him to tiptoe around the subject. You'd let your guard down and you right now you were completely defenceless.

"There's two years worth of entires." Harry boldly stated, making you cry even more. You weren't crying because you were offended or angry at Harry. You weren't even crying because he'd known and hadn't reached out to you, because you knew that you would've never told him the truth. You were crying, however, because he was making you realise how much you'd been through and how long you'd suffered for. You were tired - so tired - and it took you seeing what was happening, written down on paper, for you to come to terms with that.

You couldn't do anything but cry. You finally had someone who knew and it felt amazing. All those sleepless nights wondering whether you'd even be alive in the morning. All those days when you'd thought about ending it yourself. All those days when you cried until you felt numb, just to soften the pain. All those days, were over. You knew Harry wouldn't let this carry on now - not over his dead body.

"You're okay." "You're safe." "I've got you." Were some of the phrases that Harry kept on repeating to you. He was adamant on helping you understand that nothing bad was going to come of you now that you had him by your side.

"I-i'm so-rry Ha—"

"Hey, no, no. I don't need an apology Y/N/N. I need you to be okay, okay? I need you understand that none of this is your fault. None of it. You are so special Y/N/N and you don't deserve any of this, okay? I need you to understand that I can no longer sit back and do nothing, but write in my notebook anymore, though, okay?" He spoke a lot of words and you found it within you to listen to every one of them. Some of them made your cry harder than others and some of them made you love him more than you already did.

"What d-do I do?" You asked, still buried against Harrys chest. He was still rocking you gently and kissing the top of your hair occasionally, reminding you that he was permanently here.

"You don't have to do anything, love, but just walk a little for me, okay?" He asked to which you nodded, letting a bunch of hiccups overtake your system momentarily.

"W-what if Ro-dger i-is—"

"Then i'm here. He won't come within a metre of you if I have anything to do with it. I promise." He pulled your head out of his chest and made you look at him, so you'd know that he was honest about protecting you with everything he had.

"O-okay." You nodded, weakly smiling in thanks of everything he was doing.

"Okay." Harry agreed. You shakily stood up, holding on to Harrys arm for support. Your body was so tired and you could feel your brain wanting to shut everything down so you could rest. You just had to keep everything going for a few more minutes and then you could finally let up. The idea of a warm, plush, bed with blankets to spare, right now, was all your heart was set on.

Harry took his arm around your waist to carefully walk you out of the house. You no longer wanted to label it as 'your house', because in reality it never had been and it never felt like it. You were ready to move from this shithole and on to something better.

After making it to Harrys car he strapped your seat belt in and made sure you were comfortable. He asked whether you needed or wanted anything from the house, but you explained that never had been anything there of yours. It was all crap furniture that you'd never want to see again and it wasn't like you'd been anywhere to keep ahold of souvenirs. You just needed your handbag and yourself. Harry made quick work of locking the house door and then running back to the car to get going.

"Can I-I sleep now?" You asked, pulling your jacket tighter around you, as Harry put his car in to reverse.

"Yes, love, you can sleep now."

The last memory you had was Harry pushing your hair out of your face before blacking out, feeling nothing but out of harm's way.

•••••

Harrys house was beautiful and you were glad you'd woken up in time to see it.

It was a little terraced house on a quaint road. The beautiful thing about the houses were they were painted in all different colours of the pastel rainbow. It started off as a soft-cherry red that lead into an apricot orange, that lead into a sherbet yellow, that continued all the way to a lavender. They definitely lived up to the name of the street they lived on "Rainbow Road". You thought it was genius.

Just before you were going to ask which one belonged to Harry he pulled up outside the sherbet yellow one. You would've guessed him to live in the apricot orange, but you were happily surprised. The yellow was a nice pick-me-up, filling you with so much joy you could burst.

"Wow." You gawked at the house from the insides of the car. You were expecting a four bedroom house with white picket fencing, maybe even a secret wife that he kept very, very, secret, but no. Harry lived in a smaller house than you, walls coated in a gentle lemon and in a neighbourhood that seemed as soft, and calm, as Harry was.

It was simply put; quite serene.

"You like it?" Harry asked, nervous tones in his voice. He hoped it was something a little brighter than you were used to.

"Harry, it's so charming," you turned your head from the house towards him, making him look right back at you, "a lot like its owner really." You blushed when you spoke, not having a clue where your confidence had come from.

"Oh really? Want to butter me up any more, love?" He teased you, taking your compliment and planting it permanently inside his mind. You'd called him charming and he would never shut up about it until the ends of time.

"N-no." You let out between giggles. You were at peace with yourself in this moment.

"You sure? I mean, i'll take all the compliments I can get to be honest." He put his hands up in defence, and you sat back to watch him own the moment. You rolled your eyes at his narcissism, before moving to let yourself out of the car. Harry followed swiftly, locking up his car before unlocking his front door.

After he'd turned the alarm off, he waited for you to enter before locking back up and ridding himself of his shoes. His house was quite chilly, which he apologised for as a result of leaving the heating off during the day when he's at work. You had no quarrel with that, finding his passion for the global green very considerate.

"Come through, please. I can put the kettle on if you want and maybe a biscuit of some kind. I have ginger nuts or custard creams if they appeal to you," whilst Harry took himself through to the kitchen you couldn't help but freeze up in the hallway, getting all teary eyed, "I have to say though my favourite biscuit would probably be—" Harry stopped when he walked back to see you crying. His heart dropped at the sight. Of course seeing anybody cry is a horrible sight to witness, but seeing you crew was almighty worse.

"Sorry, Harry," you shook your head in embarrassment, "it's just i'm quite overwhelmed at how lovely you are and the support you're willing to give me and it's all just quite a lot, sorry." You rambled, letting a few stray tears fall. If there were a competition for who could cry the most in 24 hours, you would win first place and then some more.

"Hey, no, it's completely fine. I should have been more sensitive, I apologise. We can just go and sit on the couch for a bit if you want?" He offered, not wanting you to feel pressured at all.

"Yeah, that sounds nice." You nodded, mentally reminding yourself to stop giving reasons for Harry keeping on apologising to you - even if it was nice to hear someone else for someone else doing it, other than you, for once.

He lead you in to his living room, hand in hand, and you were taken aback by how wonderful it was in there. The room was rectangular, with the TV placed in the corner of the room next to the bay window. The bay window was covered in blankets and cushions, with adjacent floating shelves that contained tens of classic reads. The sofas were a luxurious velvet blue and it made the room feel expensive. The sapphire of the couches brought out the colour in the grey floor you didn't even know existed. The fireplace was classically built, wood burner and all. The room was on the small side, but it made it all the more homely. It was a delicious delight.

"It's not much, but it's home you know?" Harry felt like he had to apologise for it being lesser than your previous house. In reality, you adored his much more.

"Harry it's stunning. I'm jealous that it's yours and not mine." You couldn't keep your eyes away from the room, finding new things to be mesmerised by.

"It's yours too now." Harry proudly stated, making you shoot your head to him in shock. Of course you thought that you'd be living with Harry for a little while before you could get yourself back on your own feet, but you didn't expect him to share it with you like how he was suggesting. He noticed your expression and thought he'd overstepped a line, "I-if you want?"

You couldn't help but let out a little flurry of sobs, stopping yourself before it turned in to a bigger breakdown.

"Sorry! I'm being silly. It's just been a long time since i've been this happy in a house." You shook your head at your own silliness.

"No, no. It's not silly at all. I don't understand, but you could help me to if you want to?" Harry wanted to give you a way to tell someone your story. He wanted you to feel safe in opening up to someone, anyone.

"Yeah. I'd really like that, please." You quietly agreed.

"Okay. Let me just turn the heating on and then i'll be right back. Please just make yourself comfortable." He didn't want to tell you to make yourself at home because he knew you already felt it. He was honoured to be the someone you wanted to open up to, but even more proud of you for being strong enough to want to talk.

"Perfect."

•••••

After a couple of hours just crying to Harry, letting him learn of everything that had happened the past couple of years, you finally got the strength to get up off the couch and make a cuppa.

You'd told Harry everything - not a detail left out. He deserved to understand what your life had been like, considering he was doing so much to help you out. Harry really had been your knight in shining armour. Harry had to stop you sometimes to rant about how much he despised Rodger, which you found quite hilarious. You were pretty sure that he popped a blood vessel on his neck because of how passionately angry he got. You had to calm him down sometimes by holding his hand, squeezing it to reassure him that you were safe now.

Now you were messing around having a tea competition.

Harry claimed his cups of tea were the best in the Northern Hemisphere and he was very willing for you to challenge him on that. You made your cup of tea, for him, and he made his, for you. You hated to admit it but his cuppa was extraordinary - but you were a very sore loser so you couldn't tell him that. He knew though by the way you downed the whole mug in less than five minutes. He was worried that you'd burn your throat but you were very adamant on downing the whole drink.

The warmth and comfort of the hot drink reminded you a lot of Harry.

"Harry?" You asked, putting your empty mug in the sink to wash later.

"Yes, Y/N?" Harry responded, mouth full of ginger-nut biscuit. A little cloud of biscuit poofed from his mouth as he spoke, which he blushed in embarrassment over.

"Can I have a look through your notebook please?" You held your hand out to wait for him to deliver you the notebook. You knew he would eventually give it you, but you weren't sure whether he would give it to you so soon - not wanting you to step on a wound that was still very open.

"You sure you want to? I can keep it until you're ready?" He checked to make sure. If you believed you were ready then he wasn't going to stop you, but only be there for you if you get upset.

"I'm sure. I promise I wouldn't ask if I didn't think it was right to." You nodded in assurance, wiggling your fingers in gesture for him to hand it over to you. He nodded and smiled in response, before pulling out the book from his coat that was hanging over the back of a chair. He did it all one handed, still holding his cup of tea in the other - the cup of tea which you were upset that he'd given 2 Michelin stars to.

"Okay." He warmly smiled at you before standing back to let you go through the book in your own time.

You worked your way through every page, wincing when you saw some pages filled entirely with tally marks. There was never a day where there was no tally marks and that made you deep how insane it had actually been. Looking at this from the outside, now, was a challenging perspective to wrap your head around. You never understood the gravity of the situation until you stood back and peered in from the outside. Harry's book, however unsettling it was, comforted you in knowing that there had been someone there for you when you believed otherwise. He was your silent guardian angel.

Flicking through the book you finally reached todays page. You read down it and were impressed by how right Harrys tallies had been. He'd correctly scored the right amount of bruises and even annotated where he thought they were. It was a weird talent, but he sure had it.

Deciding that the page was incomplete you grabbed a nearby pen from the side, unfortunately it was a different colour to the one already on the page, and made a simple adjustment to the writing. You even underlined it. Once finished, you held the page away from you and smiled at how content you were now.

You handed it back to Harry with the biggest smile you, and him, had ever seen on your face. You almost looked mischievous.

"What did you do?" He asked accusingly, setting his tea on the table to see what damage had been done.

"Needed to update it." You simply put it, expressing a softer smile now.

You watched as Harry read over the pages, trying to figure out what you'd done. He flipped right to the end, thinking you'd most likely have written something on the most recent pages. He turned all the way to the back, where fifty blank pages remained, but there was nothing. He turned to the front, and nothing. The next guess he turned to todays date.

Tuesday 10th November

He skimmed the page looking for what was different - if anything. He quickly glanced over to you and he saw you smirking, which was a sign that he was getting close to figuring it out. He couldn't look at you and not internally comment about how beautiful you looked. You were a sight for sore eyes and nothing less.

Then he looked at the end of the page and it made sense.

•Total smiles = III

You'd tallied your own smile.

Harrys eyes started to water. He was so unbelievably proud of you. He could already see that you'd come so far and it had been a matter of hours since you left that god forbidden house. It was going to a very gradual process but he couldn't be more proud of you if he tried. You shot up out of your chair when he started to cry, though, thinking that you'd done something wrong.

"Harry i'm sorry. I can buy you a new book if I ruined it. I can—"

"You didn't ruin anything, love. I'm just... I'm just happy that you're happy. I've waited a long time to see you like this." He came to hold you close, noticing how you didn't even flinch when he came near you. You were improving by the second and it was a wonder to watch.

"I've waited a long time to feel like this." You admitted, looking past his teary eyes to see hope hidden behind the water. To hear Harrys compliments was something quite touching. Not having heard any compliments from your, said, husband for years had been a challenging setback, but one that you'd go through all again if it meant you got to hear Harry say all these wonderful things. "It's like, sometimes the pain gets hard, but now you're here and I don't feel a thing."

He took an extra step towards you, cautiously bringing his hand up to place upon your cheek and lower jaw. As soon as he felt you melt in to his hand, humming at the blissful warm feeling against your skin, he traced his thumb back and forth against the softness of your cheek. He brought a calmness to your life that you never realised was missing and it made you grateful to finally have it.

He made you feel home again.

You were so thankful for everything Harry had done for you. He'd silently opened you up into sharing your story. He'd always have been the one to make you smile, even on your worst days. He'd never given up on you. He'd offered up his house to you until you figured out what you wanted to do next. He'd cared for you on all the days you never thought anyone did, with his little secret notebook. He'd loved you for being you. He'd made you feel special on those days where Rodger would make you feel impossibly small. He'd done it all for you.

There wasn't enough ways for you to display your gratitude towards him. You could take him out to as many meals, buy him as many X-Box games, treat him to as many football games that your money could stretch to buy, but it would never be enough compared to what he'd done for you.

"Hey, you okay? You look lost in daydream land?" Harrys voice brought you back from your intense thoughts and back to him.

"Just thinking that i'm never going to be able to thank you enough for all this." You told him exactly what was on your mind, because he was actually someone who would listen to you. As you spoke you carefully brushed a fallen curl back behind his ear, and kept your fingers dancing around there in order to keep you focused.

"You don't need to Y/N/N. You've given me everything already." His words caught your attention, because they weren't true. You hadn't given him everything.

You hadn't given him you.

"Well what about me?" You asked, curious to know if he would take you if you were offering.

"And what about you, love?" He asked, smiling at you for an answer. He wanted you to explain what you meant before he answered under the wrong impression. You two knew there was an undying romantic tension between you both, but neither of you had ever brought it up because you were married and he was too out of your league - or so you thought.

"What if I gave you me? What if you were mine and I were yours?" You shyly asked, bracing for the rejection he was bound to give you - until he didn't.

"Then I would be the luckiest man alive." He answered so simply, yet so effectively. "In fact, I really hope that you don't run from me."

"Really?" You asked, shocked that he felt the same way. He had been shocked too to hear you offer yourself in to a relationship, and so soon after just slipping out of an abusive one. You were positive that you were going to need counselling, of some kind, in order to build back up the walls Rodger had so disgracefully bulldozed down. You needed to become more emotionally stable before venturing too far in to any new relationships, you accepted that, but you were willing to seriously consider being with Harry - if he'd have you.

"Really, really." He nodded enthusiastically.

"I don't want to rush in to it, though, because I don't think that would be fair on you. I'm still a long way from emotionally recovering, but if you're willing to wait then I promise to be there waiting too." You explained the best way you could, hoping that he would understand the concept of what you're trying to convey. He knew you weren't ready and he was okay with that.

"I've always been waiting, love." He replied and that was enough for you both to know that things would be alright from now on.

••••••

It took you a while, but you were finally at your happiest.

You were taught believe that home was the house you grew up in. It was the neighbourhood and the architecture that stood within it. What you weren't taught is that home can also be a person, and your person was Harry.

Three months after spending every day with that ray of sunshine, he asked you to be his girlfriend. It had taken a lot for you to get to that point but you were so ready for the next chapter. He'd asked you so casually that some may not even have thought he was being serious, but to you it was exactly the way you envisioned it to be - watching "Educating Manchester" with a bowl of ramen noodles to share between the two of you. It was so minimalistic and you loved him for it.

Neither of you had specifically said that you loved each other yet, but it was blaringly obvious that you did.

Over time Harry helped you find family members and old friends, helping you stitch back together the individual patches of your life back together and create the beautiful blanket it once was. None of it would be possible without Harry and you were so blessed to be able to call him yours.

Rodger had tried to come get you multiple times. He'd hung around outside the school a few times and had even turned up to Harrys house once. It was scary and you wanted it to stop. Harry has gone livid when he found him on his doorstep, having to really hold himself back from tearing him limb from limb for the sake of you and your mental recovery.

"If you ever fucking come near my house or my girl ever again, I swear it won't be pretty, man." Harry was grinding his teeth together, doing everything in his power from keeping this anything more than a verbal fight.

"You fucking threatening me, pal?" Rodger spat, quite literally, in Harrys face - something you were quite accustomed to.

"Listen to what I said and then I won't be." Harry bargained, which you were so proud of him for keeping as calm as he was. You could tell he was raging though, ready to pounce on something.

"I ain't taking no orders from you." Rodger piped back, pushing Harrys shoulder back slightly. That infuriated you. You knew first hand of what this man could do with his fists and you would do anything to stop Harry from experiencing the same things you did. You loved him with every bone in your body and you'd rather wish yourself ill than watch him get hurt. So you stepped in, from where Harry'd had you stood behind him to protect you.

"Y/N—" Harry started, but stopped when he knew you were fully capable of fighting your own battles. Plus he was right next to you if you needed him, unlike all the times he hadn't been.

"Ah there she is, my little bitch." Rodger laughed, displaying his ugly smile he had the misfortune of owning.

You felt Harrys fists curl and you slid your hand in between his fingers to calm him. Your touch made him feel relaxed, you knew this, so you used it to your advantage. Harry let out a slight animalistic growl when Rodger spoke to you, but nothing more. He knew you could handle this.

"Rodger you are not invited here. This isn't your property and you've been asked to leave multiple times. If you don't leave within the next minute i'm calling the police. That's not a threat, that's a promise." Harry doubt o squeezed your hand to let you know you were handling this amazing well, especially mentally. He only wished he was half as strong as you.

"Ooh she's finally got the balls to stand up for herself. Is that because Mr Harry—"

He quickly shut up when he saw you'd just dialled 999. You weren't afraid of him like it used to be. There would always be that trauma any time you see him, but you were getting stronger against him which only made him weaker.

"This isn't over." Rodger angrily stomped his foot like a child, only making you internally snicker.

"It is and you'll soon come to realise that." You smiled and nodded your head towards the main road. He snarled at you before walking away, knowing he couldn't put up a fight against either of you anymore.

When the door closed you let out such a sigh of relief. You rested your forehead against the front door, in peace knowing Rodger was nowhere around to hurt you and you'd successfully stood up to him. If there was any a time for champagne and party poppers it was now, but you guy something ever better.

Warm lips pressed against the cold of your neck.

"Hmm." You sighed in content and pleasure.

"You were so hot just then." Harry stated, which is not where you thought this conversation would turn to. You expected him to start talking about how proud he was of you and then start talking about how you were long-term going to deal with that asshole. Instead, he seemed very affectionate.

"You think?" You teased him, leaning your head to the side to allow him more access to your neck.

"So hot." And it didn't take a rocket scientist you decipher what you two did for the rest of the day.

Rodger hadn't been in contact since and it was now 5 months without him. 5 months clean, as you liked to label it.

You and Harry continued to live under his sherbet lemon home and work in the beloved school. The children knew that you were a couple and were always grossed out when they'd catch you holding hands or kissing , when you two thought no one was around. Hallie had even made another badge for Harry to have and it was a small heart with your name written inside, although it was not coloured in very well and your name had been spelt wrong it still managed to make Harry cry.

Life had an unfortunate way of turning out for many. For you, your unfortunate story had occurred at the beginning of your life. Now, you couldn't be happier. Life was a blessing and the people in it were even more so.

It had been a long journey to get to today, but now you could finally rest.

[poprock-gangsta]

𝕾𝖔𝖚𝖗

꧁༒༺ Flame’s only the doctor can fix ༻༒꧂

Summary : Following a guest speaker's appearance in your class, an unusual sensation washes over you. However, it's not a feeling of discomfort; rather, it's as if you've become entranced in a captivating trance.

Kinks : Choking, Degrading, Praise, and Breeding.

Tw: Hypnosis, Drugging, Cursing, Manipulation.

Word Count : 2.6k

Enjoy!

You got out of bed and started on your usual morning routine before leaving for the akademiya. You panic as you try to find your uniform, which you are sure you laid out last night. Finding it, you quickly change and run out the door so as not to waste any more time than necessary.

Once you get there, you look at the time and curse at your tardiness, certain that your teacher will give you a stern talking-to. Your professor gives you the side eye as you walk in and continues to do so as you make your way to your seat. Your professor resumes her lecture as you settle into your seat, and you tune her out. That is, until she mentioned an arriving guest, which immediately piqued your interest.

"Class, we have a visitor all the way from Snezhnaya coming today." You turn to your instructor, wondering what could possibly have compelled someone from Snezhnaya to travel all the way here. A million different possible questions to why the guest was here run through your head. A knock resounded through the classroom, and the air seemed to shift, as if everyone inside knew the person behind the door was someone who commanded respect.

You stare at the tall, pale man with the long, blue hair as he enters the room, trying to get a sense of who he is. Yet the only thing you could point to was that he was truly from Snezhnaya; his outfit clearly demonstrated this, as he was dressed in winter attire even in Sumeru's summer weather.

He seemed to notice that you were looking at him and shot you a glare, which, despite his mask, you could still feel. After a quick exchange, he approaches the podium, where he places his hands on it before casting a glance around the room. Soon after, he started talking, and it was like you were in a trance; you had no idea what he was saying, but you could feel its power.

By the time your consciousness returned, class was over and your unknown visitor had already left. Unable to let go of the inspiring man, you skipped the rest of your lectures and headed outside.

You found him outside the akademiya, talking to what you assumed were his subordinates because they were dressed similarly and were on one knee looking at the ground. "Excuse me, Sir, I was wondering if you would be willing to finish your lesson from just now," you say, clearly showing more excitement than intended. The man looked at you before a long grin spread across his face. "It appears you've taken a liking to my speech," the man says before walking away clearly leading you to follow.

I'm the Dottore, but my enemies call me Doctor," he says, looking back at you for an instant. You then ask , "So what brings you all the way from Snezhnaya," as you stare at the floor. He stops in front of a house and announces, "I've come here for a project of some sort," before opening the door and inviting you inside. "You see, I want to shape Sumeru into a place of wisdom," he says, turning his entire body to you. Coming right up to you and whispers, "Will you help me?" in your ear.

You say, "Of course!" as if in a trance, as if you're unable to say "no" but you don't mind the sensation and may even have come to accept it. Well, I can't wait to see you tomorrow," he says, leading me back with a grin on his face. You flash back a smile and then run off to your own house, where your happy expression lasts the entire trip. When you arrived, you noticed that the cloudiness in your mind began to lift, but you can't say that you don't miss its presence.

You get up and do your usual morning routine, packing your bag you head to the akademiya. Then a throbbing pain in your head serves as a reminder that you need to visit Dottore immediately. Your brain seems to be clouded.

You've made it back to the house where Dottore took you the previous day. You knocked, but there wasn't an answer; you kept knocking, but there still wasn't an response. You open the door and look around, but you didn't see anything until you look down and notice the passageway leading underground on the floor.

With the little courage you had left, you made your way down the seemingly endless tunnel. Once you got to the end, though, the view was spectacular. It was a laboratory with all sorts of strange crystals and machines. Dottore, however, was the most impressive sight of all as he sat at his desk, intent on his work.

You fiddle with your figure and say, "Umm Sir Dottore, I've come back," but he either doesn't hear you or chooses to ignore you. You browse the shelves, dragging your fingers across the glass jars and books, until you spot something interesting. Akasha Terminal Brain Waves, you place your hand on the book's spine in preparation to open it, but the forerunner suddenly says, "Don't touch that," without turning from his work.

Come here, he says in a voice as smooth and soothing as honey. You set the book back down and approach him. Saying "yes," though you felt like a puppy who's been grounded for roughhousing. Then, he says, "There's something I need to tell you," as he wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you in, to were your lips gently graze his mask.

While sitting on his thigh, he says, "The truth is I need a little help." While slowly placing his empty hand on the middle of your back. You were so close to him now that you could feel his breath on your collarbone. You wouldn't lie and say the heat of his breath fixed with the coldness of the air wasn't sending shivers down your spine.

You ask, "How can I help?" without letting your gaze wander. He took his hand off your back and reached into the dresser, where he promptly produced a small pill. He runs his fingers over the pill tenderly and explains, "You see, for me to get a full understanding of this medicine I need a test subject.”

Staring intently into his eyes, you say, "So you want me to be your test subject. His hand now flat in front of you, and the pill in plain view. "Only if you want to," he says. At that precise moment, your previously presented headache suddenly dissipated, and you felt as though your mind was completely clear. For once, it seemed like you could make a decision without fear of repercussions.

"I'll do it," grabbing the pill out of his hand you toss it back without thinking twice about whether you'd choke on it or not. After what seems like an interminable round of "100 questions," Dottore finally pulls out his notebook and gives you a quick check up. You both return to the upper floor once he has recorded your answers to his questions. Looking over you one more time , he orders you to check in with him every day and report any adverse effects immediately.

꧁༒༺ Time Skip ༻༒꧂

You and Dottore have been getting along fondly, with daily checkups and his occasional request for your assistance with some of his experiments when you're both free. You're initial impressions were spot-on; he was an exceptionally bright man, the likes of whom you couldn't help but admire on occasion.

However, while you were at home performing your routine admiration ritual. You, suddenly felt off, as if a fire had been started in your entire body. You took this as one of the side effect of the Dottore pill and sprint out the door to get to his place as soon as possible.

When you got there and opened the door, you found the top floor empty. You then proceed downstairs to meet with Dottore. You felt like your legs were going to give out at any second after seeing him, and the heat that had been infecting you had only intensified. So you muster up what little energy you have left and make your way to one of the stools.

Your attention was riveted on Dottore the entire time you were there, and it seemed as though everything he did set you on fire. You grind against the stool slowly, so as not to distract the harbinger. As you sway your hips up and down you felt your cunt throb, you grind deeper into the stool in an effort to increase the friction between your body and the surface. Now that you've settled into a comfortable rhythm, you turn your head to check on Dottore to make sure he hasn't caught on to your good work. Once in the clear you rest your head on the table in front of you and bite down on your arm, trying to stifle a lustful moans.

As a knot forms in your stomach, you tighten your grip and bite down harder on your arm. You bucked your hips against the stool so hard that your leggings were giving out from under you. But just as you were about to unravel into two, a hand wrapped around your throat and jerked your head back.

“Dottore smirks,and says "So this is what you've been doing ," as he ghostly runs a finger across your throbbing clit. “M’ It's not what it seems like,' ' you mutter under your breath. Then which he replies , "So weren’t trying to fuck youself stupid on my stool," as his lips grazes along your ear. You purred a soft “Please “ as you felt your climax slip slowly away.

“Please what," he growls in your ear . You wiggle your hips and say, "P-please fuck me," hoping to generate some friction. After that, Dottore slowly returns to his seat and sits down, opening his legs. And says in urgent yet seductive command "Come here now,". You stand up and make your way towards him, but once you're in front of him, your gaze begins to wander.

“On your knees” he says while watching every inch of you squirm , once you 're finally in front of him, he unbuckles his belt, freeing his cock from the restraints of his pants. His tip was pink and leaking with precum. “Suck”

You nodded and leaned forward, shyly licking the tip of his cock. You collect all the pecuniary that was dripping out of his cock on the tip of your tongue before you taking the head into your mouth, swirling your tongue around it. He groaned and grabbed a fistful of your hair, forcing more of his cock into your wet mouth. You gagged around him and he groaned, hips sputtering. You pleasured him as much as you could, running your tongue against the vein that ran along the underside of his cock. “ M’ Fuck Angle… just l-like that “

He groaned, letting out ragged breaths and occasional grunts. He began thrusting into your mouth after a bit, using you as a pleasure hole. The sound of your lewd noises and gagging only spurred him on as he fucked your face, forcing his cock down your throat with each brutal thrust. He thrusted about seven more times before he halted and held your head down, making you deepthroat him. He held his dick in your throat for a solid ten seconds before he pulled out.

You immediately gasped for air, greedily sucking it into your lungs. “ Fuck… Angle that’s a good girl. Now get up and let your doctor take goood care of your “ You caught your breath before getting up and sitting on his lap. He flipped your dress up and revealed your drenched panties that outlined your cunt.

“You‘ve got such a pretty pussy angle. So beautiful “ he complimented, before leaning down to nibble on your ear. Then he hooked his fingers on the sides of your panties and tugged them down, his breath audibly hitching as he took in the sight of your bare, sopping wet cunt.

“You're such a slut. You're sopping wet and I haven’t even touched you yet” He says, dragging his finger along your pussy lips. He drew tight circles on your clit, you moaned and arched your back sinking deeper into him. “There, there my precious slut, I’m going to take such goood care of you”He assured you. He grabbed his cock and lined it up at your entrance, slapping his tip against it a few times.

Just then he slammed himself inside, not giving you anytime to adjust to his length and girth. You meow, as you gripped on to the sides of the chair. “Your so tight for me angle, f..fuck” He buried himself right in your cervix before he dragged his cock back out, leaving just the tip inside before he slamming back in, going so deep.

M’…S’ so deep doctor..f-

You whined, starting to feel in your tummy. He start to pick up his already animalistic pace, stuffing your cute little cunt full of his thick cock.Roughly squeezing your thighs each time he went balls-deep in your pussy.

“ M’ such a good slut, I’m going to fill you up so good”

He thrusted hard into you causing you to see stars . It was like nothing else was on your mind but getting him to cum deep inside you. Just then he pulled you by the waist and impaled on his fat cock making his balls slap against your ass x7.

He waited until your cunt started spasming and fluttering around him. Your moans echoed throughout the whole room blocking out every outside noise. “Gonna cum for me, huh? Gonna get you to cover my fat cock with your slutty cum? Gonna milk me dry? I bet you want my fat load inside, dirty fucking cum slut."He leaned down and whispered condescendingly into your ear.

You said nothing as your eyes progressively rolled back into your head as he continued to pound your weeping cunt, groaning into your ear and biting at your neck. “Cum for me angle, Go on cum on my cock like the dirty whore you are”

It only took a few more deep thrusts for you to unravel on him, your cunt squeezing him so hard it almost slowed down his pace. You came so much that some of it dripped out and fell onto the floor , but your cream left a pretty ring around the base of his cock

“Fuckkk.. gonna fill this pretty cunt of yours with my cum. Gonna put a fucking baby in here. You want that? Huh? Want me to fuck a baby into you?"

He purred into your ear, and you nodded brainlessly, feeling your eye roll to the back of your head once again.He groaned and gripped onto your hips with a force he hadn't used before. He slammed you on his cock a few more times before shooting a load of warm cum straight into your womb. You felt full like if you took one step you would completely undone.

He didn't pull out, instead, he stayed still and made sure that when he pulled out, very little of his cum would be wasted. You lay there, desperately trying to catch your breath as he gave little, gentle thrusts, pushing his cum further inside of you.

“I would call this experiment a success” he sang, placing one last kiss on your cheek.

After a wild night of festivities, you had finally woken up. However, you conclude that, Dottore was nowhere to be found. You make an effort to stand up but end up stumbling back down. Then, you see there's a letter that's lying on his desk, which reads.

Get back to Snezhnaya, rest up, and I'll send someone to get you as soon as possible.The other table has some clean clothes, if you can make it over there. Hahaha