#bc those are natural barriers

[ghwosty]

the intimate tension between me and the storm surge inundation map

[acheronist]

ive gone on tangents about this on twitter but the Absolute Old Man Yaoi Of It All during every interview where unshaven vitamin D deficient CSKA head coach seryozha goes Ohh.. Stevie Yzermanov…... (stares off into the distance before remembering he’s being filmed) vs Steve perpetually dressed in 500 layers of sweaters and jackets polishing his glasses to maintain his emotionally closed off demeanor while being bothered once again by media about why HE(!!!!!) hasn’t retired 91 yet, and having to say once again Um Yknow, It is Not my Decision to retire my Good Friend and incredible Teammate SirGay’s number .

[redr0sewrites]

Arcane request time!

I'd love to request an Arcane woman x sub! male reader smut one shot. As I'm unsure of their sexualities I'll let you choose your favorite if that's okay with you.

🥀A/n: WOO!!! why did i lowkey base this off of monster by lady gaga.... 😭 anyways i love this req sm. i decided to do Ambessa for this request bc she's so fine and i havent written anything for her (please survive the season pookie) ♥️

🥀Cw: smut, sub!male!reader, dirty talk, kinda fluffy tbh, sleepy sex, overal filth

🥀Character(s): Ambessa x male!reader

🥀minors dni

waking up next to Ambessa is a rare experience. more often than not, she's busy with work or diplomacy, so you cherish the mornings you get to spend wrapped in her arms.

today was one of those instances, and you awoke to your lover just a few inches away from you, her curls sprawled across the satin pillowcase and a muscular arm tucked over your body. the usual furrow between her brow was relaxed, and the tense creases of her face were smoothed by blissful slumber. she looked like a goddess, and the warm sun peaking in through the window only amplified her beauty.

suddenly, Ambessa shifts, the mattress rippling beneath her as she groans. she never does stay asleep for long, it's practically in her nature to be an early riser. she stretches, pulling you in closer and tucking her head atop yours. you find yourself nuzzled against her bare collarbone, suddenly aware of the fact that your lover slept completely nude. she continues to stir, still groggy from sleep.

"i could feel you staring..." she rasps, pulling away to look you in the eyes. there is a rare, genuine smirk on her face, and her surprisingly light mood is infectious. you only giggle at her remark, and she rolls herself on top of you, pinning you down against the sheets.

"whatever happened to good morning? have i fallen in love with a delinquent?" Ambessa mocks you, but theres a playful hint in her rough voice that only draws you in.

"maybe you did..." you murmur, and Ambessa leans down to whisper in your ear. your acutely aware of her muscular body on top of yours, and the way her firm, weathered hands find purchase on your body. "it seems theres a monster in my bed," she purrs, one hand cups your face and supports her weight with her elbow while the other rubs teasing circles onto your hip. "does this monster need to be taught a lesson in manners?"

"i'd say my manners are just fine, thank you," you tease, and Ambessa hums thoughtfully. "i suppose another lesson wouldn't hurt now, would it?" she whispers, before pinning your hands above your head in one swift movement.

you open your mouth to protest, but your met with her tongue sliding between your lips as she enraptures you in a filthy french kiss. blood rushes to your cock as she spreads your legs with targeted accuracy, sliding a firm thigh between them. the only barrier between your skin and hers is the boxers you fell asleep in, and a small stain is beginning to form from the precum coating your tip.

you gasp against her mouth, her powerful form cages you in as your back arches. the slightest friction is applied to the tip of your leaking dick as it rubs against her thigh, and you whine sinfully. Ambessa pulls away to admire you, leaving a thin trail of spit connecting your lips in her wake.

"oh, darling, you look good enough to eat," Ambessa croons, sucking a dark mark into the skin just above your collarbone. she wastes no time in tearing your boxers off, leaving you completely bare beneath her. your cock springs up against your abdomen, already hard. calloused hands travel across your body, one gripping firmly onto your thigh and the other rolling your nipple between two fingers. you moan at the stimulation, but Ambessa shushes you as she crawls down between your legs.

your heart pounds against your ribcage as Ambessa blows hot air against your leaking cock, watching as you twitch with arousal. a firm hand applies pressure to your navel, keeping your hips pinned to the bed as she takes your tip in her mouth.

"o-oh!" you moan, throwing your head back against the pillows. Ambessa smirks, swirling her tongue against your sensitive cock head while bringing one hand to massage your balls. the stimulation is intoxicating, and the only thing keeping you from bucking into her throat is the large hand keeping your hips pinned against the mattress. the coil in your abdomen begins to tighten as she continues her ministrations, massaging the base of your cock and balls with her free hand.

"please.." you whine, thighs clenching around her head as your cock twitches in her mouth. Ambessa hums, sending vibrations traveling up your spine as you begin to descend into ecstasy. however, just as you begin to reach the peak of your pleasure, she pulls away, leaving your cock twitching against your abdomen.

"why'd you stop?" you whine, pushing your hips out towards her, hoping to entice Ambessa into taking you into her mouth again. she only gives you a throaty laugh, before crawling up to straddle you.

"did you seriously think i'd let you cum that easily?"

this is kinda short but whatevsss its done‼️ sorru the ending is so ass buuut i just didn't know how to end it 😭 anyways, hope yall enjoyed, pls feel free to request more! im soooo happy classes and finals r over and i get to have more free time to write and draw ♥️♥️♥️

[n1daehodefender]

Kang dae-ho angst headcanons

pairing: Kang dae-ho

A/N: This is not a x reader bc i have never written full angst BUT i have a couple angst Drafts of dae ho x reader, if you want me to publish them lmk idk if their Any good tho:( anyway requests are always open!!!!

Warnings: The following headcanons contain themes of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), childhood abuse, violence, and psychological distress. Also this is how i see the character, out visions might be different! Some of these might be canon

His father’s disdain for his interests and the forced enlistment in the marines haunt Dae-ho, leading him to constantly question his own worth and choices.

Conditioned by past abuse to believe he is always at fault, he apologizes excessively, even when he has done nothing wrong, reflecting his low self-esteem.

Dae-ho frequently experiences vivid nightmares of the shooting incident during his marine service, often waking up in a cold sweat, heart pounding, as the memories replay in his mind.

Even in seemingly safe environments, Dae-ho remains constantly on edge, his eyes darting around, muscles tense, always anticipating potential threats due to his PTSD.

Certain sounds, like gunfire or loud bangs, trigger intense flashbacks to the traumatic events he witnessed, causing him to freeze or react defensively, reliving the moments as if they were happening again.

He avoids discussing his time in the marines, deflecting conversations or changing topics to prevent resurfacing painful memories that he struggles to suppress.

Dae-ho grapples with overwhelming guilt, questioning why he survived the shooting incident when many of his comrades did not, leading to feelings of unworthiness and self-blame.

To cope with his trauma, he often shuts down emotionally, finding it difficult to connect with others or express his feelings, creating a barrier between him and those who care about him.

Sudden movements or unexpected touches cause him to flinch or react defensively, a reflex ingrained from his time in combat and his abusive childhood.

Fearful of the nightmares that plague his sleep, Dae-ho often stays awake for days, leading to chronic exhaustion and difficulty concentrating during waking hours.

Believing he is a burden due to his trauma, he distances himself from friends and family, preferring solitude over the risk of causing them distress or facing their pity.

In high-stress situations, Dae-ho experiences debilitating panic attacks, characterized by shortness of breath, chest pain, and a sense of impending doom, leaving him feeling powerless.

Trust Issues: Betrayals and loss have made it difficult for him to trust others, always questioning their motives and fearing abandonment or further hurt.

Physical closeness triggers memories of past abuse, causing him to shy away from affectionate gestures, even when he craves connection and comfort.

To mask his insecurities and trauma, Dae-ho often overcompensates by displaying excessive confidence or bravado, hiding his vulnerabilities behind a facade.

In an attempt to numb his pain and silence his thoughts, he occasionally turns to alcohol or medication, leading to moments of dependency and further self-loathing.

During periods of extreme stress or sleep deprivation, Dae-ho experiences hallucinations of his deceased comrades, blurring the lines between reality and memory.

Due to his father’s authoritarian nature and strict military superiors, Dae-ho harbors an ingrained fear of authority, leading to anxiety in hierarchical settings.

Confined spaces remind him of traumatic situations, triggering intense claustrophobia and panic, making it difficult for him to use elevators or small rooms.

Fearing loss, Dae-ho becomes overly protective of those he cares about, sometimes to the point of being overbearing, driven by the need to prevent further trauma.

Stress-induced dissociation leads to gaps in his memory, causing him to forget important conversations or events, adding to his frustration and sense of helplessness.

In an attempt to regain control over his life, Dae-ho becomes obsessively perfectionistic, setting unattainable standards for himself and berating himself when he falls short.

Past experiences have instilled a deep-seated fear of failure, causing him to avoid new opportunities or challenges, believing he is destined to fail.

Bottled-up emotions occasionally erupt uncontrollably, leading to angry or tearful outbursts over seemingly minor issues, surprising those around him.

During moments of severe stress, Dae-ho feels disconnected from his surroundings, as if observing his life from outside his body, a dissociative coping mechanism.

Deep down, Dae-ho believes he is unlovable due to his trauma, leading him to sabotage relationships to avoid the pain of potential rejection.

Accustomed to suppressing his feelings, he struggles to articulate his emotions, often resorting to silence or dismissive remarks.

Despite self-isolating, Dae-ho yearns for companionship, battling the paradox of craving connection while fearing the vulnerability it requires.

[youremyheaven]

Venusians: The Cult of Exclusivity

In my research, I have stumbled upon Venusians either being drawn into cults or being cult leaders. It did not surprise me particularly. All Venusian nakshatras (Bharani, Purvaphalguni, Purvashada) are ugra nakshatras known for being "violent". Venus is in itself, a harsh planet. In fact, all the benefic planets (Jupiter, Venus, Mercury & Moon- in that order) are harsh and for good reason; its natives have to be "purified" by the working of those planetary energies to earn its blessings. Venus values exclusivity and separatism. There is a reason why Venus attracts Venus. It is a kind of elitism. We talk about how rare beauty and glamour is these days and we fawn over the nonchalance and effortless cool of low key & mysterious celebrities. If someone or something is plastered everywhere, it loses its "special" feeling, Venus does not mingle with the masses, Venus sets the standard, its THE blue print but it does not involve itself with anything directly, they like to sit back and watch others ape them.

All 3 Venus nakshatras have yoni animals that point to a highly sexual nature and high libido. Bharani with its elephant yoni signals an immense sexual appetite (elephant being the largest land animal and yoni animal), Purvaphalguni and its rat yoni points to freaky deaky sexual behaviour and Purvashada and monkey yoni ,,, well,, monkeys are known for their lovemaking and how human like it is so..

Sex is a big focus of all 3 Venus nakshatras, with Bharani's themes of birth and death and its symbol literally being the yoni, Purvaphalguni representing the pleasures of the bed and being symbolised by the front legs of the cot and Purvashada with its connection to water, where life originated. Venus is more than just beauty and beauty itself is more profound than "looking good". Venus is beauty, romance, love, creativity, harmony, values etc.

I have talked about Venusian men and their tendency to be drawn to violence before. If we think of sex, it is a kind of violent act in itself, there has to be a back and forth of domination and submission. If we look at animals, male animals often kill other males to eliminate competition and establish themselves as the alpha that the females pick but even in coitus with female animals (literally watch any nature documentary) the male takes on a very aggressive, dominant approach and they often look like theyre trying to kill each other (people say things like "making love like animals" for a reason, sexual courtesy is a humane, civilised approach but animals are not wired that way). In Venusian men, this kind of aggressive erotic sexual persona is very apparent and Claire said these men embody "big dick energy".

Occult knowledge is gatekept and one literally cannot access it until one is initiated into it. Regardless of whether or not we recognise it as such, there are cults of knowledge all around us and we do not even know of their existence unless we've made it past their barrier and can access it. even explaining things defeats the purpose because only someone who's ready to understand it will be able to. Its nature's way of shielding itself from the unwise or the unworthy. you can be surrounded by this knowledge and still not be able to tap into it, if you do not have the discernment. this is a kind of Venusian exclusivity.

If you think about it beauty is pain. These days we see people literally endure pain to be beautiful via cosmetic procedures but this has always been the case, victorian women used arsenic to keep their skin pale and glowy and ammonia in their hair. footbinding was a common custom for Chinese women. but even beyond enduring pain to be beautiful, if you're beautiful you will have to endure pain, be it in the way others hurt you and ostracize you out of jealousy or in how people just assume crazy shit about you. Venusian women NEED to remain lowkey bc they're more susceptible to evil eye.

(im thinking of the song pretty hurts by purvaphalguni sun beyonce 👀)

anywaaayys (me going on a random tangent exhibit 62772). we know that Venusians value and need exclusivity, they're the most clique-y in some ways and this is what makes them drawn to cults lol. A cult is as exclusive as it gets. nothing screams "im not like the others" than being a part of a cult lol

Osho- Purvashada Stellium (moon, mercury and venus)

Osho was an Indian spiritual guru and mystic. His commune and the crazy shit that went on there was the subject of the docu-series Wild Wild Country.

Sadhguru- Purvaphalguni Sun

he is an indian guru. i think its interesting how cults have to have a physical existence by way of a commune that people gather in or live in, its not just conceptual if ykwim. i think this is another manifestation of Venusian exclusivity. entering into a cult means entering and inhabiting a different world. Osho had Rajneeshpuram, Sadhguru has his Isha Centre.

Sun Myung Moon- Bharani Moon

He was the leader of the Unification Church, a famous South Korean cult and he claimed to be the Messiah

Moon was intent on replacing worldwide forms of Christianity with his new unified vision of it, Moon being a self-declared messiah. Moon's followers regard him as a separate person from Jesus but with a mission to basically continue and complete Jesus's work in a new way, according to the Principle.

Nirmala Srivastava- Bharani Moon conjunct Mars

aka Mataji Nirmala Devi, she was the founder of the religion called Sahaja Yoga. She claimed that she was a divine incarnation, more precisely an incarnation of the Holy Spirit, or the Adi Shakti of the Hindu tradition, the great mother goddess who had come to save humanity. This is also how she is regarded by most of her devotees. she has said that she was born "self realised" and spent her life "helping" others do the same

The Venusian urge to start a new religion 😤😤😤lol

Religion is exclusive and if you do not have the discipline to endure its rules, you cannot gain access to its blessings. Religion esp eastern religion is extremely Venusian af, there are wonderful blessings for those who devote themselves to it and cruel sickening punishments for those who disobey. thats as Venusian as it gets

Anandamayi Ma- Bharani Sun, exalted Venus in Revati as her atmakaraka

She was an Indian saint, teacher, and mystic. She was revered as an incarnation of Hindu goddess Durga.

Her life was suffused in Bhakti Yoga and she was considered an epitome of "divine grace" that inspired the societal cultural milieu to lead the path of service, love and constant remembrance of the divine. Her followers experienced her spiritual attributes including precognition, faith healing and miracles. Paramahansa Yogananda translates the Sanskrit epithet Anandamayi as "Joy-permeated" in English. This name was given to her by her devotees in the 1920s to describe her perpetual state of divine joy.

she wasn't a cult leader or anything, just a guru even though she rejected even that label (spiritual gurus are a dime a dozen in india, no one who's actually worth their salt will label themselves as a guru)

i think Venus' connection to religion, cults and the occult is underexplored af. the highest form of love is devotion and religion/cults demand it of their followers making it a very Venusian experience. sex, love and religion are all closely connected, people experience trance like states when they're orgasmic or during periods of intense meditation (it can also be artificially induced via drugs etc but euphoria is naturally experienced through either prayer or sex) if you look at paintings of Hindu gods and goddesses, their eyes always seem so blissed out? same goes for truly spiritual people, you can immediately sense the tranquillity of their energy and the dreaminess of their gaze, like they're not of this world.

even the word "Ananda" which means joyous, etymologically means "without end" (Ah- meaning "without in Sanskrit and nand- meaning end) so the goal of any spiritual pursuit is self realization/actualisation and a person who achieves that seems joyous all the time. Many spiritual gurus have Ananda as part of their name as well.

Swami Vivekananda- Purvashada Rising

He was a monk, philosopher and religious teacher who is widely credited with introducing Hinduism to the West.

“All love is expansion, all selfishness is contraction. Love is therefore the only law of life. He who loves lives, he who is selfish is dying. Therefore love for love's sake, because it is the only law of life, just as you breathe to live."- Swami Vivekananda

Paramhansa Yogananda- Purvashada Sun

Paramahansa Yogananda was an Indian-American Hindu monk, yogi and guru who introduced millions to meditation and Kriya Yoga through his organization, Self-Realization Fellowship / Yogoda Satsanga Society of India.

Mother Theresa- Bharani Moon & Saturn, Mars in Purvaphalguni

Mother Theresa was an Albanian nun who came to India and helped the poor and the needy. She established charitable settlements that have come under fire for mismanagement and misappropriation of funds.

Now I'll talk about some people who've gained a cult-like following or were revered in their time and considered akin to God.

Eva Peron- Bharani Sun

Known by her nickname Evita, she was an Argentine politician, activist, actress, and philanthropist who served as First Lady of Argentina from June 1946 until her death in July 1952. She was revered by the lower economic classes and helped enact a number of reforms and policies to their benefit. She also helped bring about the passage of Argentina's women's suffrage law. even decades after her passing, the grip she has on people in Argentina is crazyyy.

fun fact: Madonna, Purvaphalguni Moon & Rising played Evita in the movie of the same name in 1996.

Tito- Bharani Sun

Josip Broz, commonly known as Tito, was a Yugoslav communist revolutionary and politician who served in various positions of national leadership from 1943 until his death in 1980

He was a popular public figure both in Yugoslavia and abroad. He remains a popular leader in the former countries of Yugoslavia. Tito was viewed as a unifying symbol, with his internal policies maintaining the peaceful coexistence of the nations of the Yugoslav federation. his legacy lives on and he was a VVV popular

Rasputin- Bharani Moon

He was a quack with no actual powers but man did he have a following

Rasputin was a Russian mystic and holy man. He is best known for having befriended the imperial family of Nicholas II, the last Emperor of Russia, through whom he gained considerable influence in the final years of the Russian Empire

Historians often suggest that Rasputin's scandalous and sinister reputation helped discredit the Tsarist government, thus precipitating the overthrow of the House of Romanov shortly after his assassination.

Taylor Swift- Purvashada Rising

Taylor's chokehold over her fandom is insane. I think it's due to her PA Rising bc wheww

There is a reason why Venusian influence is sooo common in the charts of it girls and icons. Venus is THE blue print, it makes others want to be like you and imitate you and also claim they hate you or dont know you all in the same breath.

Trisha Paytas-Bharani Sun & Jupiter, Ketu in Purvaphalguni

Trisha has a cult like following whether u want to admit it or not. Girlie has been doing this for a decade and a half and is still somehow relevant?? literally most of her contemporaries have been cancelled or left the platform and she's still standing?? despite a gazillion controversies that too lol

Now I'll mention some famous celebrities who are in/have been in cults

John Travolta- Purvaphalguni Moon

He was/is a Scientologist

Park Bogum- Bharani Moon & Venus

Bogum is part of Jesus Centred Church which is a cult and he was apparently even given his name by the founder/leader of the cult. There have been rumours that Bogum left the controversial church/cult and joined a normal church but there isnt enough info to confirm this

Nazanin Boniadi- Purvaphalguni Moon

She is a former Scientologist who was "trained" to be Tom Cruise's gf before he met Katie Holmes. read about the crazy and torturous stuff she was subjected to and you'll wonder why tf scientology hasn't been shut down by the government yet

Ruslana Korushnova- Purvaphalguni Moon

She was found dead at 20yrs old under mysterious circumstances. i do not think she committed suicide at all but she spent some time at the Rose of the World which is a culty organisation.

British TV producer and filmmaker Peter Pomerantsev has theorised that Korshunova's suicide was related to her involvement with Rose of the World, a controversial Moscow-based organisation which describes itself as "training for personality development". While researching for a documentary into Korshunova's death, Pomerantsev learned that the model spent three months attending training sessions at Rose of the World. These sessions—which encourage participants to share their worst experiences and recall repressed memories—are modelled after Lifespring, whose controversial methods were the subject of multiple lawsuits for mental damages in the US during the 1980s. Korshunova attended training sessions with a friend, Ukrainian model Anastasia Drozdova, who committed suicide under similar circumstances in 2009. Friends of the two women reported changes in behaviour after several months at the Rose. Korshunova became aggressive, while Drozdova experienced violent mood swings and grew reclusive; both lost weight. After three months of training, Korshunova returned to New York to look for work, where she wrote of feeling lost and doubting herself. Rick Alan Ross, head of the Cult Education Forum, argues that organisations such as Rose of the World "work like drugs: giving you peak experiences, their adherents always coming back for more. The serious problems start when people leave. The trainings have become their lives—they come back to emptiness. The sensitive ones break." Only months after leaving the Rose, Korshunova was found dead.

Michelle Pfeiffer- Bharani Sun, Purvaphalguni Moon, Rohini Rising

She was involved with Breatharianism, a cult that believes that you don’t need to eat food (Say what?!). She joined after moving to Los Angeles and looking for a group to feel comfortable with. They focused on diet and exercise but believed that people could live by sunlight alone at the highest level of the cult. She actually realized that she was in a cult after helping her first husband Peter Horton prepare for a movie role where he played a cult member. She said, “We were talking with an ex-Moonie, and he was describing the psychological manipulation and I just clicked.” (crazy to me that the not eating real food did not click??)

Rose McGowan- Purvaphalguni Sun & Mercury, Mars in Bharani

She spent her childhood in the Children of God cult and her family fled from its clutches after they started advocating for adult-child sexual intercourse🤮🤮🤮

Sharon Tate- Purvaphalguni Moon

Sharon wasn't a member of a cult but a victim of one :((((

Sofia Hayat- Purvaphalguni Moon

Sofia was a model, then she quit the industry to be a nun, now she calls herself a shaman and a healer and posts weirdly sexual vids on IG

Zaira Wasim- Purvaphalguni Moon

she quit acting to devote herself to religion and because she felt that being in Bollywood made her lose touch with her faith.

This is a very Venusian experience imo and one of the reasons why Venus thrives in keeping itself hidden or taking away other people's access to it is because otherwise Venusians feel contaminated almost?? other project onto them heavily and they feel clouded by it, unsure of their own identities. they feel like they're losing touch with themselves. many Venusian celebs are known for frequently changing their persona (Bella Hadid, Ariana Grande etc come to mind) the more time they spend exposing themselves to others, the more confused they become about who they are, they lack a stable self image.

Religion and faith can act as stabilisers and help these natives feel more grounded.

A reason why Venusians (idk if you noticed by most of the gurus were Purvashadas and most of the followers I mentioned were Purvaphalgunis, with an equal mix of Bharani natives in both) are drawn into cults is also because Venusians can only thrive in Venusian environments?? Otherwise they feel desolate and lost, a lot of people join cults because they don't feel understood or connected to people in their normal life. cults look for people who need help, and give it to them on predatory conditions.

Purvashadas are often spiritual leaders/gurus but seldom blindly devoted followers because being the final Venus nak, it transcends this toxic grip of Venus. Purvaphalguni is the height of Venus and these natives are constantly seeking spiritual truth and belonging but never quite ascending, as it is Venus at its most indulgent. Bharani is the first Venusian nak and I have found that the first nak of any planetary dominance is in some ways its "softest" manifestation, its the baby among the naks. The nak in the middle is the peak/height of that planetary energy and thus, the most cruel or harsh manifestation of that energy along with the concluding nak but the concluding nak also kind of transcends its influence??

high fashion/luxury etc is also very Venusian bc theyre the ones who covet having things others dont have. anywayyys this is just a stray thought lol

hope this was informative!!

[hazelnutsummer]

Okay uh-

ATALANTA (Gem)

The witch of deer. Her nature is to be two-faced. Beware this witch and her forested barrier. Despite what her form may suggest, behind the veneer of a peaceful fawn lies a truly wolffish demeanour. Anyone foolish enough to fall for her skillful deception are left nearly unrecognizable, mangled beyond belief and left to feed the blackened oaks that populate the witch’s barrier. No one knows how genuine her deer form is, as she’s shown to be earnest in her desire to protect her forest, but also seems to delight in the cruel chase brings to those who enters her barrier. She has a complicated relationship with the hoodie witch.

BLANCETTE (Pearl)

The hoodie witch. Her nature is isolated insanity. Through an agonizing journey spent completely alone, this witch’s mind has completely shattered. She’s completely unstable, seesawing through intense manic violence and intense depressive lethargy. It’s come to the point she is unable to remember the companions that once accompanied her, and it’s debatable whether or not she’d recognize them in the state she’s in. She’s most powerful when the moon isn’t visible in the night sky, but is weakest when the moon is full. Perhaps a team of close friends can make quick work of this witch.

QUIXOTE (Scar)

The cartoon witch. His nature is foolishness. Within his barrier lies only billions of monitors and televisions playing an ideal reality. Those who stay in this barrier for too long will be fixated on these shows, and willingly give into the witch, as the witch gives them a taste of pure, if not fake, joy. The witch himself fully believes he’s sending them to that “ideal” world, unaware that he’s causing harm to those he tries to help. If one were to attempt to attack him while he’s in this process, he will show no mercy. Those who have opposed him have found themselves meeting unusual deaths, be it crushed by a random anvil, or run over by a random parade float.

GRIAN (his witch still has his original name as he didn’t make a conventional contract)

The poppet witch. His nature is reminiscence. A mound of forgotten and dead memories held together by the sepia toned memories of his past. He refuses to part or let go with this aspect of his past, so much so he refuses anything new entering his barrier. Evading him is impossible, for he has eyes all over his barrier. You can make him fly into a rage if you burn any of the mementos he treasures. His true form is a little doll, it’s fabric thinned and it’s yarn hair matted. It just goes to show how futile it is to hold onto the past.

HOKY WOMK LITERALLY EXPLODED MY BRAIN WOAUGHHHH WAIT THIS IS TOO GOOD I THINK CHERRY AND I HAVE TO MAKE THIS CANON…

Anon you CANNOT just ‘okay uh’ AND DROP THE BIGGEST BOMB ON US WHAT WHAT WHAT…

And the fact that. That you got pearlo before we confirmed her existence is insane. I can’t even reject any of them at all bc you have somehow got all of their personality down to the bone…

But truly!! This is so insane, if you prefer for remain anonymous we will respect it, but since this is too good to not use, we would like to credit your creativity the day we use this (if we ever get that far lol)!! If you’d like to, please reach out to us and we can establish the person to credit!!!

Your creativity is truly amazing, and we really appreciate the thoughts you put into all this!!

[imissivan]

so i think in every universe that’s not the present one, ivantill is requited openly and goofy and sometimes still repressed and bad at communicating, but however long it takes, they find each other. but i have to admit. what they’ve gone through — the lack of freedom, happiness, the total lack of human social networks, not even not being raised by humans but the total absence in their lives of humans who connect with humans AS HUMANS — rather than as human pets — it prevents ivan and till AND mizi and sua from forming relationships like we think of them. yknow? mizi and sua are much more open about their regard for each other, because of mizi’s unique character and situation, the level of innocence she’s able to retain. but the rest of them know what’s going on. the pain of that existence stunts what possibilities are available to them. in that environment, they do what they must to survive — which means ivan keeping his feelings under tight control and accepting his fate to yearn and never have; till deeply, deeply repressing whatever he feels for ivan bc mizi represents innocence and a hope for a joyful, free life that has been denied to all of them; sua not connecting with anyone besides mizi, marching to her death without consulting mizi bc it’s all she can think to offer. the circumstances of this universe are such that it’s nearly impossible for healthy or full human relationships to form. for children destined for alien stage — for whom growing old is already a distant dream, much less growing old with someone they love by their side — it’s even less likely. this is also what makes these relationships that DO form despite the circumstances so damn powerful and compelling — the time mizi and sua get to share (mizi crying with frustration when they drift apart when they’re so little) — the stability that ivan and till’s bond provides, even if it is volatile and characterized by miscommunications and misunderstandings. for me, with ivantill, it’s key that it’s NOT totally unrequited — the feelings till has for ivan are confused and unexamined, but like, i don’t blame till for that! he’s got plenty to worry about already, and the circumstances of the garden also exacerbate ivan’s struggles to communicate and understand his feelings properly, too. loving gently and warmly and out in the open like mizi does does not come naturally or at all to ivan in this world! and that adds barriers between ivan and till. but they still care for each other so much — till does look back, there are moments of tenderness, of ivan being different for till than other ppl, of till treating ivan differently, which along w the narrative structure and their relationship paralleling mizi and sua’s and so on, express a deep regard for ivan that goes mostly unexpressed / is made difficult by their situation.

but then!!! you look at the goddamn AUs and shit!!!! and one, look at ivan’s character — outside of the trauma of alien stage, he’s so much more open and soft and loving! to till, specifically — able to get his attention and form a relationship not just based on proximity or thru antagonizing him. that’s very important, in my eyes, to making ivantill work. it’s something ivan can’t do in alien stage, that kind of open expressive love, but if he could, i think it would present him as a viable option for love in till’s eyes (as much as such a thing can exist in that world). like at the bare minimum, till would KNOW — whether ivan confesses or not — that ivan loves him, be more aware or sure of that. ivan can express affection or admiration for till in the open, at times when till’s not asleep or distracted or whatever.

second, till is also different! mizi is not the only source of warmth and happiness in an otherwise bleak and deeply painful, abusive life. without those incredibly challenging circumstances forcing till into survival mode, he has more options for how he can imagine his life, relationships, and express himself. he doesn’t have to put his whole being into loving the one person who expresses warm love as a survival mechanism to keep inspiring himslf to live. instead, he can observe and better understand ivan. and ivan is also less difficult to understand, himself better at expressing himself. with fewer thorny barriers between the two complicating their attitudes towards one another, the two can be friends, best friends, without complication — and thus also more. and i feel like i can’t ever stop thinking about the biggest barrier to their relationship in the alien stage world, the lack of examples of loving human relationships. how do you know what it means to love someone, if you have never seen it? never felt it? i think about this on a queer level, too — took me forever to figure out that i DO feel certain kinds of attraction differently towards different kinds of people, that i do feel it at all, bc at first, i only had 1 narrow example of what romantic or sexual attraction could be. without examples of other possibilities, it never occurred to me that what i was feeling counted. and that’s still with and understanding of any concept of love or romantic relationship!! poor ivan and till are out there fuckin tryna invent human social networks from scratch, RIP

this has been such a long stream of consciousness thinking about these guys so i just want to mention one final thing.

THE GODDAMN ACTOR AU.

they can be platonic OF COURSE. but the depth of emotion and their bond and everything in the other universes — to me, actor AU is the healthiest and easiest and sweetest universe in which the two of them get together. they’re not in each others lives from childhood, and it works in their favor acrually — they’re both fully realized humans, who have lots of chemistry, who deeply admire each others abilities, have similar interests — if we can bring the knowledge of their dynamic and the depth of their bond from the alien stage world to consider what they’d be like together in the actor AU, like 🥹🥹🥺🥺🥺🥺. an open and confident and loving ivan. a mature and expressive and affectionate till. they’re at their best in actor AU, and it’s that AU that really settled my brain into “shipping these two forever and ever” mode. because it can’t happen in their original universe — not without huge changes and a lot of time, like even if they both escaped with their lives, they would need time to heal and grow into their own people before they could really have a health relationship. but in actor AU 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 what they have and can have in actor AU 🥺🥺🥺🥺 gives us a glimpse at what they could be, if they got that time, if they got that chance. what they can be in every other universe, whenever they get that chance. AHHHHH i just love them so freaking much

[hrrtshape]

hi emma,

yk, the ask about the possible inequality and bigotry in ur dr made me notice smth. in ur most recent post about things that are unreal but were natural in ur dr, u mentioned certain prestigious private schools like st. lazarus and le rosey only being accessible to the elite. this made me raise an eyebrow bc u mentioned how u removed all that nasty stuff, but isn't scripting stuff like that making good and quality education inaccessible to the working/middle class population? or do u have alternatives that still provide good education at an affordable fee to those who arent as extremely privileged?

there is no hate or malice in this message btw!!! its ur dr and honestly do wtv u want. love yaaa

AAA HI OKAY. i probably misspoke in my original post, my bad, my bad. so. the thing is. poverty literally does not exist in my dr. like. gone. outta here. no one is clawing their way out of some american dream nightmare, no one is rationing toothpaste, no one is fighting a raccoon over dinner scraps. just. not a thing. nonexistent.

but. okay. the fancy schools. st. lazarus, le rosey. they’re just prestige. just a name. like getting into a fancy university. connections, kewl facilities, sure. but education itself is good everywhere. and i mean everywhere. even in places where, in my cr, people think europe is a country. like. no gaps. no oh well if you went to a public school you’re kinda screwed lol. no one’s being held back because of where they were born.

and money is easy to get. embarrassingly easy. it’s not a game of oh well, you’re poor, tough luck. no class warfare, no systemic barriers. you want something????? you can have it. no one’s being exiled from good education because of a paycheck. that’s just not real.

tax evasion exists. old money, new money, yeah, still a thing. but but but but but !!!!!!! WAIT WAIT WAIT. just wait.

the difference is that none of it is life-ruining. no one is getting crushed under the weight of wealth disparity. no one is locked out of opportunity because of where they started. the whole ‘if you’re born poor, you stay poor’ thing is deleted. poof. gone.

the rich still do their little rich people games, sure. but no one is suffering because of it. no one is choosing between food and rent. no one is trapped in some hellish cycle of struggle. it’s just… aesthetics at that point. flexing for sport. you can literally become rich as hell in my dr if you work for two years. everyone is rich. everyone.

like. you wanna be rich???? you can be. you wanna be comfortable and never think about money a day in your life???? also very very very very VERY possible. the gap exists, but it’s not a problem. it’s not the monster it is in our cr. it’s just. background noise. set dressing. as i mentioned, no wars, no poverty, no racism, no weird shit happening. ITS A BETTER CR FOR A REASON

hope that clears it up. mwah mwah.

[lakesbian]

Hello! The way you have talked about American Psycho (the novel) has me interested. I know it was/is critically acclaimed, but would you generally recommend it? (as in, do you think would be a worthwile and/or enjoyable read for most people?)

i liked the novel a lot it's one of those books where i read it and im like. okay yeah i see why this critically acclaimed famous literary work is a critically acclaimed famous literary work. i read it over the span of like a week or a week and a half i think. the biggest barriers to someone getting through it would probably be the general writing style and the intense and explicit bigotry + gore.

i saw a post on here where someone said they couldnt get through the first chapter or so not bc of any gore but because the dense, vapid writing style just wasn't enjoyable despite knowing that it's an intentional choice to say something about the narrator. but i really really liked the style of narration. the author made so many intentional choices of varying subtlety that were really fun to try to pick up on and pick apart while i was reading. its just really well crafted. things get nonlinear and unreliable and droning and theres run-on sentences--and all of this comes off as being very intentional, well-placed elements. it evokes great comedic effect when it wants to, it can be really unpleasant when it wants to be, and it can really dig into certain emotional effects when it wants to. its just a really really well crafted book.

i feel like it's like. if you try to laboriously sound out & visualize every designer brand patrick mentions in your head while you're reading, yeah, you'll get bored? but most of the paragraphs where patrick is droning on and on about stupid shit are packed full of little jokes, like how tons of the elaborate meals he describes at rich person restaurants actually sounds kinda disgusting if you stop to think about it for a minute, or how if you look up the songs he's analyzing, he's wildly, stupidly incorrect about them. and when these droning paragraphs aren't there for humor, they're there for the horror of this being patrick's mind, blended very effectively with the horrible shit he does.

imo when theres an intentionally droning/dense bit you have to like. Parse it and understand what the purpose of it is as an element in the story without losing sight of the forest for the trees. many comedic elements are long-running; once you parse how shitty much of the food sounds, it gets easier to read and see the joke in subsequent sections, and to notice when a mention of food is for a different purpose instead. if that makes sense? and if you don't naturally click with the writing style (i was enjoying it basically from like. the fifth page onwards. it took me like 5 pages and then i was with the program), i think it's worthwhile to spend some time thinking about what the book is doing & why to see if you can get into the groove and get something out of it. it's fun and interesting to read well written books and consider how they're written and what effect it produces and why!!!

as for the horror/gore ive also seen that mentioned as a reason someone took a while/struggled to get thru it which like. that makes sense. just about every slur is in there. the depiction of bigotry-fueled murder + torture is constant and explicit. it is frequently intentionally a fever dream of tears and suffocating alienation and bloodiness and intestines and ruined genitals and so on and so forth. there's probably every kind of gore you can imagine (eye, tooth, tongue, vaginal/anal...maybe not penile? various organs, really just every orifice, power tools, cannibalism, human butchery, child murder, animal murder, rape obviously, et cetera), and it is Really Explicitly Described by an author who's really good at explicitly describing things. this is a matter of personal taste; if youre like me, youll really enjoy when it manages to be unnerving/discomforting & youll want to rotate it in your brain. if you do not have a very high tolerance for written description of such things, you will probably really struggle to get through it, which like. makes sense. at this point there's probably the question of "but is all that gratuitous and unnecessary?" and no i really dont think so. i think you need all of that to tell the story its telling and make the points its making and convey the emotions its conveying. it would not be the Experience it is without the violence. i like the violence. and as an aside, i think it has a really good balance of moments where it leaves something awful to your imagination vs where it goes all-in on depicting it.

now im gonna non sequitur but i think the biggest thing about the book is this quote from the author:

Bateman was crazy the same way I was. He did not come out of me sitting down and wanting to write a grand sweeping indictment of yuppie culture. It initiated because of my own isolation and alienation at a point in my life. I was living like Patrick Bateman.

patrick bateman is like. Hes profoundly fucking mentally ill. and i had my autism moment tally for him running thruout the book. the most awesome thing about american psycho To Me is that at its very core, if youre the right kind of person, it's relatable, in a warped sort of way--you're not that guy, because you don't kill and eat people, but the mentally ill things he's thinking to himself as he cries and throws up while eating the people he killed? recognizable as an experience, if in an anti-aspirational sort of way. i like books where you can tell the author was vomiting up an exploration or an indictment of whatever misery they were simmering in. the result here is a book that is an Experience to read, and quite possibly an at times delightfully uncomfortably familiar one. the whole thing is just a really interesting and visceral experience and headspace to be in and to dissect and ponder.

so overall. no idea if id say its a worthwhile read for Most people, i dont know most people. but, like, the movie isnt good in one of those "good movie adapted from source material thats kind of shitty/whatever/inaccessible" ways. its a solid movie because it managed to Not crazy-style fuck up adapting a really good book. i think if youre intrigued by the book at all and feel like youll be ok with the content then id definitely recommend it. again i really enjoyed it. they need to give me more books that are good to read . like american psycho

[merymoonbeam]

Mist and shadows

I talked about how Elriel might be connected to mist and ley lines in this post and then I remembered another quote that has mist in it...

“A bird of burning feathers,” I said. “Firebird by day,” Rhys mused, “woman by night … So she’s held captive by this sorcerer-lord?” Elain shook her head. “I don’t know. I hear her—her screaming. With rage. Utter rage …” She shuddered. Mor leaned forward. “Do you know why the other queens cursed her—sold her to him?” Elain studied the table. “No. No—that is all mist and shadow.”

This is about vassa and why the other queens sold her to Koschei.

You might ask how this connects to ley lines...

Look at this quote describing what ley lines are.

“No,” Aidas agreed. “But Helena knew that Midgard possessed its own magic. A raw, weaker sort of magic than that in her home world, but one that could be potent in high concentrations. She learned that it flowed across the world in great highways, natural conduits for magic.” “Ley lines,” Bryce breathed. Aidas nodded. “These lines are capable of moving magic, but also carrying communications across great distances.” Like those between the Gates of Crescent City, the way she’d spoken to Danika the day she’d made the Drop. “There are ley lines across the whole of the universe. And the planets—like Midgard, like Hel, like the home world of the Fae—atop those lines are joined by time and space and the Void itself. It thins the veils separating us. The Asteri have long chosen worlds that are on the ley lines for that exact purpose. It made it easier to move between them, to colonize those planets. There are certain places on each of these worlds where the most ley lines overlap, and thus the barrier between worlds is at its weakest.” Everything slotted together. “Thin places,” Bryce said with sudden certainty. “Precisely,” Apollion answered for Aidas with an approving nod. “The Northern Rift, the Southern Rift—both lie atop a tremendous knot of ley lines. And while those under Avallen are not as strong, the island is unique as a thin place thanks to the presence of black salt—which ties it to Hel.” “And the mists?” Hunt asked. “What’s the deal with them?” “The mists are a result of the ley lines’ power,” Aidas said. “They’re an indication of a thin place. Hoping to find a ley line strong enough to help her transfer and hide Theia’s power, Helena sent a fleet of Fae with earth magic to scour every misty place they could find on Midgard. When they told her of a place wreathed in mists so thick they could not pierce them, Helena went to investigate. The mists parted for her—as if they had been waiting. She found the small network of caves on Avallen … and the black salt beneath the surface.” (hofas)

So it veils and mist is about where ley lines are at most...veiling is also important here bc Im gonna use it compare and add why elain used "mist and shadows" as an explaination why she couldnt see it.

We are gonna use the fourth dread trove and what nesta saw in acosf

A fourth object lay on the altar, veiled in shadow. But she couldn’t make out more than a gleam of age-worn bone—

This here I think connects to leylines bc the fourth dread trove was in crescent city so Nesta couldnt see it... only that it was veiled in shadows and what ley lines do? Veil the space between the world.

So...veil...mist...shadow....it is all connected.

And now shadows...I think it is pretty obvious. Azriel. Shadowsinger. And this connection I added in my thin places/ley lines post. Im adding the link again. You can find all the parallel quotes to this 👇🏻 in there.

Azriel didn’t give them a chance to exchange another word before murmuring shadows swept around them. Nesta couldn’t help clinging to Azriel, gleaning on some innate level that if she let go, she would tumble through this space between places and be lost forever.

And how Vassa connects to this...

I talked about Vassa and Elain connections in this post about the swan lake and how Sarah might use it for Vassa's storyline.

And another thing about Vassa and Elain is this...I connected it to book of breathings. You can read it here.

[tinrange]

Gelboys Thoughts 1

Zoom classes wow my eye just started twitching.

Blocking on spotify as the first move what 17 yr old was involved in the writing team ctfu.

07s in 10th grade... okay so that places the timeline of show uncomfortably close to my own graduation so this might make me spiral.

This ITSAY mirror moment. Boss Only knows how to make reflective work!

I love making the characters so sticker laden, thats exactly what 2022 felt like and it makes their insecurities starkly apparent when they attempt to cover them with vibrancy.

Google maps mention. So charming to have a show that cares to integrate technology as life.

Actually as springboard thats why i loved the blocking montage from earlier. Nothing is really over until youve released them from your circle and ousted them from your life, and robbing people of the ability to See You online is such a statement of intent even if you end up caving later on in person.

Finding someone on ig using the location tag. Okay this is getting real scurry.

Purposely liking someonee oldest pic to show interest is Nasty FIEND behavior. Run!!!!!!!

The stylization of the chargers just made my eyes well up with tears almost. Its indicative of how gently the production is treating their interior lives, everyones charger is different and vibrant just like their lives and these phones serve as points of contact to each other in more ways than one. Theyre gathered and theyre a Group.

Getting caught eavesdropping and watching through your phone so you pretend to take a photo. #real #beenthere #theyweretakingnotesfromme

Absolutely obsessed over the editing of this show, its as maximalist and overbearing as all feelings are in highschool. Emotions spill out of you at that age and the overbearing nature of them can be as blinding as all that neon and all these fast cuts.

Heard that this was filmed on phone and I love that in some scenes theres a conscious decision to allow it to be Phone Quality.

Chian is such a problem cryingggg

I really love how this show respects that social media is an extension of self for youth, and in doing so how it shows respect to a younger generation. A majority of highschool media now is created by those who had to come of age as technology became accessible without regard to how thats changed. Chian following Fou4mod is framed as a big deal because it is; if its not an exchange of accounts the act of following is never casual. You had to think of the person, find their account, and put yourself in the vulnerable position of being caught thinking of them. Online accounts as a barrier carry a weight thats often dismissed but this story cannot work without allowing this moment to have heft. If a follow is just a follow then situationships (like hes probably about to be in with Chian) cannot work, Chian showed his cards and made Fou4mod feel like he has less to lose because he took such an Important Step. Lesser shows have made fun of that step!

Thats all to say Chian is definitely a problem and he probably needs to get his ass whooped in the near future (^-^;

Chian barely follows anyone... hes true to this life unfortunately. My thoughts are with Fou4mod this is about to be a life altering relationship (Extremely Negative).

The iphone change has been taking me out like highschool really is about being a follower until youve carved an identity.

Watching it put to screen wow social media really did change dating into an intricate ritual bc i audibly groaned when he asked for the air drop... like no u cant be seen caring! Thats bad! We need to save the youth from this reality Every queer person must uninstall hinge now.

CHIAN IS SO SINISTER OMG SAVE FOU4MOD

"I'll let you know" "you can go first" girl i gotta turn this off now im breaking out in hives.

Playlist sharing to flirt... they were watching me edate in HS

I feel strangely emotional after watching that. There is such a dearth of television about the youth of people in mid genz who were in highschool or beginning uni during the pandemic. Every show produced and set in high school recently has been extremely nostalgic, set in a recent past, or almost out of time in a world where social media is not as important and COVID didnt fundamentally change communications and relationships as a whole.

As someone who spent a longer time in highschool than most people do, I dont think I've seen something so insightful since American Vandal. That show understood the slow nature of highschool in the later 2010s, it understood the uncomfortableness that lurks beneath your skin as a teenager and showcased it with that perpetually hazy and lazy filter that the soundcloud rap era felt like.

This show takes the exact opposite approach, COVID made all the teens and kids view technology As Them. A teenager in 2020 and 2021 was their phone because to take that away from them was to cut off any and all outside connection they had, something that was especially true for queer youth who already felt that alienation in their identity. Its lovely to see traces of that put to screen and treated with kindness, and it allows for the aesthetic maximalism to be justified through the sheer desperation they have to Truly Participate in life once again.

Really excited to watch this continue, I think its really funny how instead of ITSAYs longing and self flagellation (which was also extremely late 2010s) gelboys is fast moving and almost refuses to dwindle on their internal worlds so far, these teens just want to be out there doing things. The changed public life for kids directly after the pandemic and before the conservative pendulum swing is such a fun period to explore, I loved this first ep immensely.

[forgottenarthur]

OOC | What was at Kil-kennar?

ok so kate said

phabblebabbles 3d @quillington We haven’t discussed much abt Kil Kennar I guess beyond it being where the High Seeress lived BUT it could also have/had her acolytes who maybe were able to save some of the ancient texts before Kil Kennar fell???

and i realized like!!!!!! that we never like...talked about it???? lasjkdfkljsdf so i wanted to launch a full discussion!!!

so i ~do have some hc's that i thought id pop up here (in no particular order) which we may or may not want to use but can at least get us chatting!!

but ~first, some things we ~have established

its the religious center of the astairan faith

its effectively its own ~county but w a chosen ~high seer~ as its lord/lady rather than a great house

its high up in the mountains

its a fortress that was (pre!arthur) considered nigh impregnable (i have some madness in mind a la a certain alexander the great re how he did ~that which...i don't think ive ever actually talked abt!!)

its at a v strategic spot and ik we had ideas as to why but idr them atm alksjdfjsdf i think it had to do w being able to command both sea lanes ~and passages through the natural land barrier that is the mountains -- also there's def both the symbolic and the morale component w it being the faith center etc but i feel like it had the big north-to-south pass besides the fens in those mountains and kil-kennar protected/commanded that kinda thing or smth?? maybe it was the east to west...idk...

it has a huge ~chapterhouse where representatives from every county in the country can meet -- and i ~think we said its where the vote is cast for the ruler?? and/or the ~high seer?? but idr that distinctly

i think?? that's everything we've already decided abt it?

ok so like when i ~first envisaged kil-kennar i was heavily inspired by carcassone but like extreme edition -- this sprawling fortress built ~into the mountains and like...you trip off the tower you will be falling foreverrrrr its up there in the clouds pr much

ok so let me just get my vision of the siege of kil-kennar out of the way!

THE SIEGE OF KIL-KENNAR & THE EAGLE'S FEATHERS

ok so basically my thought was that our boy arthur went through his army and found the best rock climbers and pulled them out of the army, having them go a different way, trekking through the almost impassable mountain rocks and clefts itself rather than the narrow passages the main army took, so that the ppl of kil-kennar would never see them at all

then w the soldiers he had left, he sent the usual expected thing of a useless assault on the walls, including improvised siege ladders and towers etc but this was mostly to distract them (tho arthur himself was the first to mount the walls before the invaders from behind got there, even tho he was quickly repelled) from the fact that his real forces weren't assaulting the manmade part of the fortress but, rather, scaling the sheer rockface of the mountain and speed climbing and rapelling inside from the most impregnable part of the walls, from which point they attacked, opened the gates to arthur's troops outside them, etc, and thus the fall of kil-kennar. i do think there was a traditional siege component for awhile before hand tho-- supposedly tryna starve them out etc esp bc i think it took awhile for everyone to assemble and messages to relay between arthur's split forces etc

like alexander the great, arthur def offered big rewards to the first several to get there too given the huge risks of the whole thing and probs ~did say smth a la alexander the great that: "Nature has placed nothing so high, that valor cannot overcome it. It is by trying what others have despaired that we have [an Empire] in our power." (i think alexander the great was an ass but he really went off w that speech huh) arthur probs ended his vers of that w a crusader-esque cry of smth along the lines of 'the god wills it' and there we go

ik this sounds insane but its really happened so i feel perfectly justified! im referencing Alexander the Great's legendary Siege of the Sogdian Rock (or of the Rock of Ariamazes there're disagreements etc yknow ancient history be like that kladsjflkjsdf -- the whole thing tbf ~is shrouded in hella legend but i say its fair game here!) and his famous Flying Soldiers (besides there was a siege of a city in Sicily by the tyrant Dionysius I of Syracuse where smth similar -- if less impressive bc siege ladders -- also happened). [ "In a siege of a mountaintop fortress, Alexander offered prizes to soldiers who climbed towering cliff faces in the fastest time. Dozens of men died attempting to scale the sheer walls, but others made it to the top using a[n improvised] combination of iron spikes [tent pegs] and linen ropes—techniques still used by climbers today." ]

"'[W]hen they came to very steep places, some grasped projecting stones with their hands and pulled themselves up, others made their way by using nooses of rope, still others drove wedges between the stones and made steps on which to stand.' But without modern safety equipment like belays, harnesses and carabiners, Alexander’s men were one misstep away from disaster, and at least 30 men died attempting the ascent. 'They spent a day amid fear and toil. After having struggled over rough places, still harder ones awaited them, and the height of the rock seemed to grow. That indeed was a pitiful sight, when those whom their unsteady step had betrayed were hurled down a sheer drop; and the example of others’ disaster showed that they must soon suffer the same fate.'"

arthur was def expecting to be known as like ~the eagle of kil-kennar~ or smth after this fabulous exploit esp w his eagle and winged sun imagery and his troops' apparent ability to fly etc but instead he got butcher of kil-kennar bc ppl focused in on the beheading and not the marvelous and innovative military tactics he pioneered alkdjsfjdf and now his not!gf (he thinks) hates him for it LKSDAJFLSJKDF its rough being arthur ;DDDDD

i feel like arthur's 'flying troops' did fare better than their leader that way and got nicknamed the eagle's feathers from there on out -- thanks, guys!! a special new branch (or should i say...wing ;DDDDD) of arthur's pre-existing order of the dawn (bc yes he did battlefield knight everyone who was brave enough to dare that climb, no matter their rank -- even if you fell to your death you did so as a knight, and a knight of the dawn, at that! and if you were lucky and survived ur to this day sir so-and-so even if you started a peasant and arthur thinks that's incredibly egalitarian of him to have done laksjdfkjds)

but i feel like their thrilling, death-defying exploit probs ~was pr widely circulated throughout the empire esp as damage control for the whole beheading a witch and subsequent rioting thing laksjfjdskf but idk that it got v attached to ~arthur himself and was probs more just a cool thing that ~house varmont~ (lowkey implied twas the emperor himself no doubt...) did which ngl def does irk arthur HE WANTED THAT CREDIT!!!!!! lkajdsfjksdfj instead he's just a butcher laksdjfkljdsf ;DDD

also genuine question -- why hasn't anyone made a movie abt the siege of the sogdian rock????????? like this just feels like prime for that but anyway alsdkjflkjsdf

PONTENTIAL PRE-CONQUEST USES OF KIL-KENNAR?? (aka the actual point of this whole post...)

ok so like i was sort of thinking of the fortress of kil-kennar ig as like...ig kinda like a medieval monastery? this haven of learning and prayer that's like this really remote but incredible place sorta living outside the regular run of time kinda thing??? ~lay ppl may or may not live there as well but like sort of a religious retreat kinda vibe???? but also obv a center of pilgrimage and a restful place in these treacherous mountains where you can stop and given offerings to the guardians and get a hot meal and a good sleep etc before continuing your way across, kinda thing?

and/or maybe it was a university of some sort??? like iirc our girl @forgottenarias took a retreat there w her mom while dom was still king to help her learn abt being a seer? and, while aria's situation was secret, maybe smth it offered lotsa benefits for seers seeking to learn? so according to [ lizzy's og post abt witchery <3 ], there is 1 general thing that all witches get which is the ability to ~see the guardians~ (unless ur @forgottensaoirse ;D), but from there guardians can also gift you further low level magics, healing and/or premonitions so!! im thinking that maybe there were sort of...for lack of a better term...courses where you could learn to manage the sight and more advanced classes on magical healing and interpretting dreams and visions and such?? or even if not formal training sm then like...a bunchfof seers for emotional support/advice etc?? idk i just feel like astaira is v much a helpful place so having a place for banding together to work through this stuff just feels like smth they'd have?? esp bc it can be so confusing/scary but is also simultaneously so important/revered!!!

i also feel like, since we established that the head seer and the ruler occasionally have clashes and such, the chapterhouse might also lowkey serve as a court for them and that sort of thing as well as like a teaching place for doctrine and such but also oracle of delphi-esque readings and proclomations and such!

also yesssss deffffffff think there were acolytes and non-lay folk aplenty!!!!! and also a MASSIVE library, not just religious tho probs tHE biggest religious library in all astaira would have been located there i would guess, etc!! but full of all kinds of subjects! history, magic, you name it! still think the biggest number of astronomic books was at stafford for reasons and the biggest natural history section probs at malconaire etc buT i feel like astaira is all abt learning and so i feel like all these places have massive libraries!!!!

also roderick defffff burned all magic/religious books that weren't smuggled out!!!! an id i love love love the idea that some ~were!!!!!! ppl risking their lives to save this precious information SOB <3 hopefully some of it can be gotten into the right hands eventually...i can see aria, @forgottenbrigit , saoirse, and any other seers benefitting from it big time too, should they ever get their hands on it!

anyway idk!! just some thoughts...as always i defffff feel like ive left smth out but i can't think what it was so we're gonna just! go w it! laksdjflksdf id looooooove to hear everyone's thoughts on this/hcs of your own etc!!!! i feel like there's sm worldbuilding we can do here lajsldfkdsf <3333333

[yesimwriting]

For what i gathered from your style of writing (immaculate btw) i think reader would not responde to nates advances, because contrary to billy, stu and felix he doesnt hide his asshole ways.

So i think the main thrope would be groveling from his part

omg this ask feels like such a cross over!!

you're so right and i love the way you're thinking through this, but let's break down nate's character a little more (and reader's)

one of the major takeaways from that scene where everything that nate looks for in a girl is laid out and the scenes that explain what he liked about maddy is that there's this theme of being drawn to traditional feminity/someone that can play a traditionally feminine role

i think there are a lot of factors that play into him wanting that-- it reflects what he's familiar with, a more feminine partner will push back less/be easier to manipulate (in his head at least), and maybe a smidge of comphet depending on how you read his sexuality

one of his main fantasies is saving maddy from another man and when maddy was trying to win him over, she played into her femininity (and cassie kind of did the same)

and when you think about these reasons and the kind of girl he'd want to go for (and you look at the way he treats maddy when he apologizes and when they first started dating) it's natural for him to have some kinder qualities that come from the instinct to fill that traditionally masculine role in a relationship

so, when considering all of that,, i think nate can be really charming, maybe even a little chivalrous when he's really trying to win someone over

i also think nate's relatively good at reading people, and he can clock that the reader from that last blurb is trying to be a party girl more than actually being one, he knows that reader would never want to be around him if he's openly an asshole, so he manipulates subtly (telling reader to keep their interactions a secret from maddy for her own sake, all while knowing that the sooner he breaks that 'secret keeping' barrier, it'll only get easier to get reader to keep more and more from her friends)

i also see nate as someone who is very capable of being likeable when he wants to be, and reader being kind of sheltered/"innocent" and maddy's friend and being so determined to not like him makes him want to put in the work,,

so he's going to make a point of being soft spoken and nice when he has to see reader, and the harder she tries to dismiss him, the more he's going to commit bc it becomes less about getting maddy's attention and a little more about his ego,, and then finally, about reader

and if we're comparing this reader to final girl!reader or best friend! reader,, (you guys have no way of having known this, i barely referenced it in one sentence) i see this reader as being less looked out for

i picture her mom as one of those moms that wants to be "the cool mom" so bad so that she can pretend her daughter's friends are hers too, and she's so excited that reader is being more social/popular that she's a little lost in it

and i see reader's dad (not me finally giving readers a dad) as being almost the polar opposite, strict and traditional,, so reader still feels the need to hide going out and drinking bc it starts arguments with her parents and that makes her feel guilty

i'd really love to write a fic explaining all of these dynamics and how they overlap with the same style of narration that euphoria episodes that center a specific character's background story are,, i love mimicking niche voices like that it's so fun

anyways this was really long for no reason <3

[trans-axolotl]

okay making a separate post bc i don't really want to get into any drama but like.

idk. intersex is such a broad umbrella term!! there's many ways we have overlap in our experiences. all of us are impacted by intersexism. all of us are impacted by compulsory dyadism.

it's true that there are many of us who don't fit into dyadic ideas about cisness or transness. like, for example idk if i would ever call myself ftm. like i was assigned nothing at birth for about a week and then eventually assigned female at birth and then i went through a testosterone based puberty naturally and then was put on estrogen and anti-androgens and started growing a chest and then went on testosterone got top surgery and then and then and then. anyway its like i am an intersex trans man but im not female to male, im not a dyadic trans man, i don't resonate with endosex transition timelines whatever whatever whatever. but my identity as trans is important to me, whatever.

i know many intersex people who don't see themselves as either cis or trans and just identify as intersex. i know many trans intersex people who it's complicated. i know many cis intersex people who identify as cis but it's complicated. so i don't feel like i would ever say like "oh all cis intersex people experience this thing" or "all cis intersex people have this social location etc etc etc" "All cis intersex people don't experience this kind of discrimination."

but at the same time i am SO tired of seeing ppl make umbrella statements that are like "this thing applies to all trans intersex people" "this thing applies to all cis intersex people" and especially when it comes to saying that all cis intersex people don't sometimes have cis privilege in certain contexts or that cis intersex people can't be transphobic.

bc idk after studying the past 30 years of american intersex activism for my thesis one of the things that CONSISTENTLY jumps out to me is the tension between queer intersex community, and medicalized intersex community that is almost exclusively cis. like so many of the dsd organizations, throughout their past 15 years, have EXPLICTLY made comments disparaging other intersex organizations, calling them too militant, saying that they're ruining the intersex community because they ally with trans people like. all this transphobic bullshit. the dsd organizations today still use very gendered language, let radfems do fucking whatever in their organizations, advocate for surgery and so much other bullshit. like that actively harms trans intersex people especially in a situation where we have such limited resources. there are SO few resources for our specific diagnoses. like if i need medical information for my specific variation, if i need information on like, medication routines, genetic testing, complications, comorbidities, etc etc etc, i HAVE to go to a transphobic organization to get those resources. because there is literally not another diagnosis specific organization that exists! it's the only one! and it means that there are so many more barriers to me accessing the resources, community, and care that i need. because of transphobic intersex people. like. thats an example of how some cis intersex people really cling to their cisness, try to weaponize their cis privilege, and actively cause intracommunity discrimination. you know?

like. idk. i just think that we need to be realistic! in terms of intersex intracommunity things, there absolutely is a lot of transphobia! not from everyone, not saying that every intersex person is either cis or trans, with the understanding that every cis intersex persons experience is still shaped by compulsory dyadism and that shapes how we're viewed as our "real" gender or ways that society thinks we "fail" at our gender but just.

im tired! im tired.

[boycritter]

reasons to not be in a colcon

1)do you really want other people knowing what you think (this may change once yr in the hivemind, but you don't know that)

2) do you really want to know what other people are thinking?? (what if it's bad things. about you)

3) you can't smoke cigarettes all mysteriously under a streetlight anymore (bc everyone will know you are doing it to look cool and not because it comes naturally to you)

4) if there is no barrier between my thoughts and other people's thoughts then i cannot charge people to access my thoughts (for those capitalist anti-colcons)

[general-gt]

since requests are open!!! i'd like to request a TF fic w/ optimus bc i love him sm. maybe a first contact where the human gets caught in the middle of a skirmish. They're wearing their noise-canceling headphones and are just rocking out. they end up accidentally helping by distracting the Decepticons but simultaneously put themselves in danger. So, naturally, they are startled when they are just randomly swiped by a giant robot.

you can do whatever you want w/ it! maybe add some fearplay or a language barrier if u want to! whatever works :)

This ask is one I’ve held onto because the idea is amazing. I love the idea and I have tried to write it several times. It doesn’t want to happen, however, so I’ll just leave the idea here and hope I’ll eventually write it.

My first thought was of a human having a bad day- one spilled glass of milk away from a meltdown kind of day. They’re angry listening to music and going down a street, not noticing that everyone is going firmly in the opposite direction.

Megatron sees this incredibly idiotic move and snatches them up as a way to get at Optimus. When grabbing them, he makes their headphones fall off and they break. This is what sends them into a rage.

They cuss out Megs with so many different things that he just stands there, dumbfounded and almost impressed by the audacity of this walking rat. He gets subsequently wrecked by Optimus who snatches the human like they’re the golden snitch and runs.

They’re still fuming and halfway to crying and Optimus thinks it’s stress because of the giant robots only to have them break down because those headphones were expensive damn it! Cue awkward comforting from Optimus who is wondering if this human is missing survival instincts.

Later, they belatedly realise they should have been scared, but by that point Optimus is shopping with them in his holoform and is debating between different models of cat ear headphones and how the hell can they be scared at that?