#bc of the chains he forged in life etc etc

[simplydm]

Joe hills parody song to chains by nick jonas

[morganadismay]

inspired by my partner in crime @bisclavret and her re-inventing of morgana's arc i have decided to unleash my thoughts irt a version of bbc merlin which preserves the spirit and whimsy of season one, while allowing morgana, merlin and gwen more agency. instead of rewriting the show as is, though, i went with a thought experiment of what would happen if merlin was raised by balinor and so was moderately more self-aware than in canon. and so here is

my bbc merlin rewrite. let's go.

episode one.

little MERLIN grows up with BALINOR instead of hunith.

he's still fundamentally goofy and accident prone but he has a few more survival skills bc they’ve been living cave to cave and he understands/controls his magic better

he is, however, still lonely as balinor is a touch paranoid and off-putting (like dragon like dragonlord ig) so he doesn’t have any "real friends"

moving on. for plot reasons, balinor must go - he passes away when merlin is 18 or 19.

and so merlin starts hearing THE DRAGON in his head as his sitting in a cave alone, sniffling.

kilgarrah: MERRRRRLIN. destiny awaits. avenge your father. all hamletlike. 

grieving and angry merlin does some mental math and deduces the dragon isn’t dead as his father claimed/believed and decides his life mission is to go to camelot following the dragon’s voice and break him out

in camelot merlin meets ARTHUR and calls him out on his bullshit the same way as in the show but does not let anyone put him in stocks. instead he hides at GWEN's who takes a liking to him — they bond over agreeing that arthur is an idiot

in fact befriending gwen is what stops merlin from following kilgarrah’s his og plan to take revenge on uther and have the dragon wreak murderous havoc on camelot bc he is shocked to realise there are innocent people there 

(don't be too hard on him. he'd lived in a cave with a resentful banished father for most of his life.)

at night, merlin breaks into the dungeons and meets kilgarrah at last

the dragon is like fucking finally my liege and tells merlin abt emrys and destiny and the once and future king and how he should avenge his father and reclaim camelot with arthur in the golden afterglow

merlin is like um? no.

instead he tells kilgarrah that sure he’s going to free him but then they’re going away together to have adventures as a dragon and his dragonlord that merlin and his father never got to have on account of balinor’s depression and hermitage (kilgarrah squinting at him like how do i make this about my political agenda but he rolls with it for now) and how it’s going to be awesome sauce.

kilgarrah then informs merlin he needs a sword forged in dragon’s breath to cut through his chains

merlin: no chance i can just spell the chain gone - dragon: did u think you can just walk in here and get me out - merlin: well yes

so merlin has to stick around grudgingly to get the sword but hey! he already knows the blacksmith’s daughter and he has a vague plan of getting her to help him

in the meantime he meets GAIUS who jumps at the chance to try and brainwash him (i knew your mother, bla bla, bla bla great man your father was, you must never tell anyone about your magic and stay here in my line of sight where i can monitor your suspicious proceedings) but merlin again is like umm. bye. and steals a bunch of potions and gaius’s spell book instead 

he fucks around a bit, perhaps running into arthur again and causing more problems and issues while arthur tries to get him with his mace. history repeats itself etc. etc.

merlin goes back to gwen and asks her to make him a sword, telling her he's gonna try out for a knight. gwen (after witnessing all the above) is like ...right. BUT she's compelled by the idea of actually Making a sword on her own so she agrees and tells him to come back for the sword in a few days.

while the sword is being cooked, merlin accidentally saves arthur in the Saucery attack from the first episode. he regrets its sorely when UTHER promptly makes him arthur’s manservant  

appalled, merlin tries to speed up both gwen (who's like. no merlin. i can't make it faster.) and the dragon but the latter finally senses his chance at stirring shit up and insists merlin needs to stay put until the sword is ready.

episode two.

so merlin has to stay in camelot for now. however, this merlin is not here to fuck around. he's a dramatic 18 yr old who thinks he's in hamlet. he's not about to polish any swords here or muck out stables.

so instead he does a REALLY bad job at being a manservant. like on purpose horrible job, worse than in the show, basically being like i dare you to fire me. fire me. you want to fire me so bad. he sets things on fire. insults visiting nobles. serves arthur rat for no reason. arthur is entranced. 

meanwhile, as merlin is running around the castle being a terrible servant his interest in piqued by MORGANA who looks ill and nervy (her nightmares literally worsened due to his proximity). merlin questions gwen innocently and she tells him about morgana’s nightmares and potions from gaius

merlin like [squints] that shady old conker? giving her The Loathsome Slumber? that’s suspicious

but gwen is also not stupid and she’s like [squints back] girl what were you doing at the devil’s sacrament knowing what Loathsome Slumber is?

one night, as he's sneaking back from the dragon's cave, merlin witnesses a bad one of morgana’s nightly attacks as she sets her room on fire. he helps her douse the fire but arthur finds them

weird and deeply awkward situation ensues but merlin is not a class traitor here so he pretends he doesn’t know what’s going on and doesn’t rat morgana out. which gives morgana hope.

she confronts him next day like you KNOW what i am. say it. SAY IT. and instead of gaslighting her merlin is like yeah you have magic lol sorry. yeah they’ve been drugging you for years. king’s gonna kill you probably. my condolences truly. and leaves morgana to her existential crisis.

meanwhile, gwen's sword is finally ready and merlin is like thank fuck time to bugger off to my beautiful dragonlord adventure in a far off land and never see this decrepit stinky castle ever again!

as he prepares to depart, morgana is busy acting shady around her chambers and doing the equivalent of i will be your friend till the day i die to gwen who’s squinting at her suspiciously and doing more mental maths

at night, merlin sneaks back to the dragon. unbeknownst to him, however, morgana follows him down there. after witnessing the dragon-breath sword-tempering she reveals herself dramatically and begs merlin to take her with him.

kilgarrah well and truly hates the idea he’s like a woman aboard a ship dragon is bad luck and it is the witch’s destiny is to ruin camelot but merlin is like i literally couldn’t care less about camelot 

morgana is like please merlin. i’m fucked. you said it yourself uther’s going to fry me. you made my life SO much worse just by showing up you OWE me this. i can no longer hide my magic now that i know about it. don’t leave me here. you know what it’s like to be scared and alone. [huge wet eyes.] bear in mind, merlin has never had a friend before, let alone a magic user friend.

so he caves. FINE. on the condition it’s only to escort her to the druids and dump her there 

he dramatically cuts kilgarrah’s chain with the sword

aaaand they fly off with a huge bang and ruckus.

while they were in the dungeons, gwen found out that morgana is missing and decided to wake up arthur (because gwen also doesn’t have any friends on account of spending every waking second with her dad or morgana)

gwen: my lord some foul shit is afoot - arthur: awhat ?

they're interrupted with a huge bang and ruckus.

as they rush to the courtyard, gwen, arthur, uther and all and sundry see the dragon flying off in its full glory. while merlin had ordered him not to kill anyone, kilgarrah's loophole is that he still batters the castle and makes their exit everyone's problem

arthur: what the devil! - gwen: sire i think the beast took morgana and merlin - arthur: why would it take MERlin - gwen: sire i think he’s a Saucerer - arthur: MERlin is not a saucerer. etcetera.

episode three.

fast forward: kilgarrah deposits morgana and merlin on a forest clearning and flies off to eat sheep and drink himself silly on fresh river water 

merlin sticks gwen's dragon sword in a rock bc he’s like well i don't want this water bottle anymore

after whining aplenty he finally agrees to teach morgana a little magic as they pick a cave to sleep in (morgana: people are going to be searching for me we should lie low for a while - merlin: NOW you say this??? - morgana: would you have let me come along if i said it earlier? - merlin: NO) 

over the next days, they make their sneaky, slow way to the nearest druid camp. merlin keeps grumbling about morgana painting a huge target on his back but she’s like *cheerfully* i’m pretty sure the dragon was a huge target anyway!

still merlin keeps being like [bad cop voice] you can’t stay with me! we’re not friends! if they find you with me they’re gonna burn me at the pyre! i’ll help u w magic and get you to the druids and we won’t EVER see each other again and morgana mostly ignores him

unfortunately, by the time they reach the druid camp, uther's knights have already slaughtered everyone there aside from MORDRED (arthur saw him and panicked/hesitated long enough for mordred to run away)

mordred telepathically beams at morgana and merlin that the knights were looking for the king’s ward and morgana is devastated by the fact that she caused the slaughteting

so merlin finally drops his emo act and is like morgana listen to me this is not your fault okay uther is a tyrant first and an irredeemable villain second to which morgana is like merlin we need to take mordred with us i owe him this at least and merlin hates that idea but then he’s like. ok but we ONLY take him to a second druid camp and then i drop both of you there because that’s his 1 idea for dealing with everything and morgana is like sure whatever

kilgarrah hates this even more than he hated morgana, he’s like MORDRED will KILL ARTHUR but merlin is like dragon i literally don’t care if arthur lives or dies. anyway where are the druids

and so merlin and morgana begin escorting mordred to a different, more remote druid camp

rewind to the castle, where uther announces that morgana is dead by the druids' hand to the people of camelot.

gwen, sick to bastard death of uther's shit, accosts arthur being like but sire you said there was no sign of her at the druid camp and arthur is like uhh yeah. and gwen is like don’t you think it’s unfair to just give up on her? just because your dad was like “she’s dead now” don’t you think there’s a suspicious lack of a dead morgana? - arthur: i didn’t think of that

so arthur goes to uther and he’s like don’t you think we gave up on morgana a tad quick but uther holds up a hand like son. the girl has clearly fallen prey to the foul beast after being corrupted by vile magicks. it is done. go whack some squires. and he seems all in all very content with letting matters lie

arthur relays this back to gwen. 

gwen: well sire i think you ought to grow a SPINE and SLAY THE DRAGON to AVENGE MORGANA because she deserves avenging. or you’re NO PRINCE AT ALL - arthur, sweating a bit: alright whatever you say fair guinevere 

so gwen makes a plan. she and arthur steal another one of gaius’s/geoffrey’s olde books and make up a beast to slay that requires a noble knight and fair maiden in attendance 

"The Beast of the Noble and Maiden" arthur tells uther confidently

and they proceed with the secret mission to avenge morgana, and gwen proceeds with her even more secret agenda of moulding arthur into a decent person

episode four.

back in the forest, the three almost identically pale dark haired sorcerers with a name starting with M finally reach the druids who welcome them warmly and say cryptic things about emrys and his destiny. this makes merlin uncomfortable and so he harshens the vibe for everyone involved 

he agrees to stay the night bc the druids insist to Celebrate them but fully intends to leave morgana and mordred there and sneak off at first light bc he’s a strong independent woman

however, morgana has a night vision of everyone in the village dying, herself being burnt at a pyre in camelot and merlin becoming lonesome and foul if she stays behind. she wakes up just in time to see catch merlin sneaking off.

she runs after him and begs merlin not to leave her with the druids. i can’t stay with them and endanger them, she says, and i can’t go back to camelot.

not my circus, not my monkeys, merlin says ruthlessly.

but then morgana is like surely you don’t want to be alone? wouldn’t you like to have a friend?

merlin is scowling at her, engaged in an internal battle between being committed to the bit and being painfully lonely, and of course in the end gives in (on account of the being painfully lonely.) FINE, he says. whatever! if we DIE it’s all your fault anyway.

and morgana breathes out in relief. they start to make their way through the forest away from the druid camp

when morgana sees a flash of camelot red between the branches in the distance. it's the knights! morgana says. we need to warn the druids! - merlin: there's no time. what we need is a diversion.

they hide behind a rock and then merlin goes OOOOOO DRAKON (which nearly gives morgana a heart attack) and they make a big fuss riding the dragon in the opposite direction of the druid camp

a few paces away from them, gwen and arthur do indeed see the dragon flying off

THE BEAST! arthur yells, waving his sword at the clouds. the druids will know where it went! gwen argues, dragging him the other way.

kilgarrah, merlin and morgana land by a cave in the mountains, not unlike the one merlin grew up in. kilgarrah grumbles about not being a horse and them botching up destiny, and generally fuck them kids. merlin tells him to get lost again.

they sit at a fire sniffling. thank you for not leaving me there, morgana mumbles. whatever, merlin says. i guess if we’re friends now. or whatever. - morgana in a small voice: yeah i guess if we are. they don’t smile at each other but smile at the opposite cave walls when they go to sleep.

meanwhile in the druid camp, the druids are glaring daggers at arthur. the vibes are tense. arthur is confronted painfully with the consequences of his father's actions and his own complicity as he learns almost everyone at the camp was affected by the raids, many children missing parents.

this time, however, uther is far away and gwen is with him so no druids are harmed and in fact they get a semi-official apology and a promise to do better.

arthur and gwen even help the druid village fend off some danger in a similar manner to the episode where they visit merlin's village.

the druids are grateful, and say more cryptic things about the once and future king and fair queen quinevere, which embarrasses them both profoundly.

all the same, the druids deny ever seeing a merlin or a morgana

(though arthur does see mordred staring at him like O_O a r t h u r . e m r y s   i s   n i g h)

in the end, gwen and arthur set off to avenge morgana again, pursuing the trail of the dragon this time

episode five.

morgana and merlin’s rat girl summer proceeds: they live in caves and eat vermin and berries and he tries to teach her magic and they’re mostly like tee hee :)) friendship

they have some magical adventures: for instance, they befriend a lad called GWAINE while camping out in old castle ruins. some magic seems to be weaved into the castle walls, as gwaine seems to think they are some sort of lord and lady

(perhaps gwaine is in the middle of his own story, experiencing a version of the Green Knight's quest - and perhaps, merlin and morgana become part of his quest, as lord and lady bertilak - and perhaps, he basically has to kiss them both)

(and then they confess they’re just yanking him about and he’s like you guyssss :D are we friends now :D and then he goes to complete his quest but promises to come back)

things seem to be looking up. at least until morgana’s bad dreams return and merlin refuses to make gaius’s fuckass potion for her

furthermore, morgana seems to be hiding something from merlin and looks ill and nervy again.

in a culmination of the growing rancid vibe between them, morgana pulls a merlin and runs away at dawn.

merlin panics and spends most of the episode chasing her down/trying to scry for her. he feels bad and thinks it's his fault for not helping her with the dreams.

when he finally finds her, morgana is halfway to joining a pack of rogue travellers who are very clearly trying to rob her. merlin fights them off and drags her away: i'm sorry! but they shouldn’t have done that! it was wrong to try and keep it from you and it’s dangerous. i’m sorry about your dreams but i'm not gonna drug you! - morgana: fine i’m sorry too i didn't mean to be difficult i just hate the dreams! - merlin: fine! - morgana: okay! - merlin [unable to hold it in]: well why did you leave then i thought we were friends or whatever!

morgana grudgingly reveals she's been having visions of possible futures where she is the downfall of camelot and merlin poisons her and then impales her on a sword down the line after they both try to kill each other repeatedly.

merlin is like. uhh. ok yeah that's pretty fucked up.

morgana, wiping at her eyes, is like. i don't want to kill you. and i don't want you to kill me. but maybe it's our destiny. so i thought maybe i should leave after all.

but this merlin is a little bit more radicalised against the idea of destiny and also really keen on his independence so he's like. well destiny can't tell ME what to do. and so i simply won't poison or kill you.

morgana glances at him and reveals she also heard the voice of a a Woman telling her she is uther’s illegitimate daughter and that he coerced her mother into having her and is now spreading the rumour that morgana is dead 

merlin is like he really sucks ass sorry morgana. if it makes u feel better my own father is dead - morgana: no merlin it does not make me feel better. [wet rat silence]

morgana, getting a grip: so i guess we shouldn’t worry about being pursued. - merlin: won’t arthur go after you though? - morgana, sadly: no he won’t.

(BUT GWEN WILL!!!!!)

episode six

morgana and merlin are back on track, vaguely concocting a plan to find the woman whispering in morgana's dreams and learn something new about their supposed destiny that's not coming from kilgarrah or the druids. it sounds like a good plan, all in all.....

………..until they stumble upon arthur, UNCONSCIOUS, in the forest.

what happened was this:

after stumbling around the forest in circles in search for the Great Dragon, arthur and gwen encountered the Beast of the Noble and Maiden (the beast proved to be real bc life is funny like that)

the Beast instantly loved gwen terribly and decided that arthur was not worthy of her, after which it proceeded to kidnap her

while arthur tried to rescue gwen back, he was first bit by the beast and then — after gwen fooled the beast with negotiations of coming to visit and then stabbed it with arthur's sword — clobbered by bandits who proceeded to kidnap gwen again

back to present day.

morgana [disappointedly staring down at her brother] is like: i don’t think i can leave him here merlin and merlin is like [sighs] yeah ig we should move him to the cave before a bear eats him. morgana looks up at him. really? you’ll help me? and merlin is like. [scuffs shoe.] well it seems he did try to find you or whatever so maybe he doesn't suck that bad after all. - morgana: now let's not get carried away he does in fact suck.

still, they drag arthur up to their cave but arthur is not only clobbered but also dying from the beast's venom. merlin rifles through the books he stole from gaius and learns about the beast of the noble and maiden. after an argument with morgana over who's doing what, he runs off to get the mortal flower or whatever it was that arthur got in the show 

NIMUEH shows up and initially tries to kill merlin when he reaches the cave - but seems surprised by the fact that he is not prince arthur, which throws her off balance and lets merlin disarm her

(there is an implication of some sort of glitch; as though something else was meant to happen here, like in the realities glimpsed by morgana. nimueh seems put off by this.)

uther does not deserve your aid or compassion, she says eventually, when merlin emerges with the flower. - i know, merlin says. i'm not doing this for uther.

before leaving, he asks nimueh if she's the voice speaking to morgana but she denies it before disappearing. merlin hurries back to the cave.

there, morgana and merlin revive arthur with a spell and the power of flower friendship

he wakes up and freaks it 

first, arthur thinks he is haunted by a vengeful spirit of morgana - until she slaps him in the face and tells him to think and that she was never really dead

then merlin comes in with the equivalent of a breakfast tray and arthur is like [points] FOUL SAUCERER. YOU KIDNAPPED this fair maiden and more importantly LIED TO ME!!! and morgana is like shut up arthur no one kidnapped anyone i have magic and i’m functionally a nomadic druid now

morgana does some half-hearted explaining while merlin performatively eats what was meant to be arthur’s breakfast. 

but the beast bit me, arthur says at last, remembering. how am i even alive?

yeah you were basically dead meat, merlin says cruelly. going green already. STINKING.

arthur: you saved my life then - merlin, glaring: yeah can’t think of why. didn’t want morgana to cry i guess. she had to beg me. i wanted to LEAVE you to rot. (morgana punches merlin on the arm.)

arthur stares at merlin then at morgana and is like so youre just living in a cave. with him. willingly.

we’re temporarily unhoused you privileged fuck, merlin says. because of wrongful accusations-

arthur: wrongful-you STOLE a DRAGON.

merlin: your FATHER stole MY FATHER’S dragon and kept him CHAINED in the DUNGEONS for NINETEEN YEARS-

SHUT IT both of you, says morgana.

merlin leaves in a huff under the pretence of checking in on kilgarrah. he's in a foul mood: arthur makes him feel contrary and impulsive and he secretly thinks morgana is going to forgive her brother and run off and leave him Alone Again and he’s like i was foolish to get attached my father was right to live in a cave i hate everybody

meanwhile, arthur: are you sure this wanker didn’t kidnap you - morgana: no you’re still the only wanker here. merlin is actually really sweet he just has some issues to work through. - arthur: SWEET. are you two COURTING - morgana: no he’s like a brother-[she pales a little remembering the real life brother situation] i mean um. we’re alike.

arthur tries to add 2+2 but fails. meanwhile morgana is like [clears throat] thanks for pursuing and avenging me nobly or whatever. didn’t think u had it in you.

then arthur is finally like [sitting up] SHIT!!!!!!! Guinevere!!!!!!!!!!!!!

episode seven.

anyway meanwhile in guinevere’s tormentous nightmare. arthur gave her his cloak before they encountered the Beast of the Noble and Maiden (like morgana in the actual episode) so the bandits actually think she’s morgana (again!) and want to ransom her 

however arthur is beast-bit and clobbered and uther is ignoring the ransom note bc he actually truly would rather morgana stayed dead so gwen’s in a bit of a pickle

but that’s how she meets LANCELOT who is suicidal!in cenred’s kingdom

after lancelot swears fealty to gwen, she gets him to steal a sword for her and they're halfway to escaping when they're stopped again. afterwards, it goes roughly like the original episode - only this time, it's morgana who saves the day, intent on avenging gwen in return for avenging her in the first place.

she helps gwen and lance escape while arthur and merlin become too wrapped up their goofy henchmen antics to be useful.

it's no matter. gwen is like [breathlessly] MORGANA…… and morgana is like GWEN.....

eventually, they all make their way out of the bandits' lair.

at first gwen is suspicious of merlin but then morgana is like he's my friend! look! i’m okay! i missed you <3 and arthur looks alive and unclobbered so she softens.

poor lancelot doesn’t know who to be more wistfully jealous of (arthur bc he’s the prince out to save gwen supposedly or morgana bc gwen’s clearly enamoured w her) but this time a) merlin really doesn’t give a shit about who gwen marries so he doesn’t meddle and b) gwen is already playing 4d polycule chess in her mind, having planted enough future policies into arthur’s head she now wants to keep micromanaging him forever

and so gwen bids lancelot to return to camelot with them and lancelot is like my lady it’s an honour i would love to die for any cause for a good cause. fight i mean.

generally this time round it’s merlin who’s suddenly having a shit time bc everyone else seems relieved and ready to go back to stinky old camelot while merlin is like well i don’t wanna. so while they're all sitting by the fire having a laff, merlin goes off to sulk with kilgarrah who’s like my dragonlord i very well told you so. and merlin is like i wish i never went and freed you you ungrateful unhelpful old dragon.

eventually, morgana finds him and is like what’s wrong and merlin is like nothing im glad i’ll finally get rid of you and can go on my dragonlord adventures. ALONE. [sniff]

there's a beat and then morgana is like well i still want to dethrone uther sorry but i also don’t want to stay and rule camelot after i want to go on magical adventures like you. and merlin is like [sniff] fine i guess i can help kill uther a little.

so they set off for camelot and gwen and arthur live in a parallel universe where they are going to peacefully explain the situation to uther who will be like oh my god you guys. MY BAD!!! or maybe vote him out while morgana, lancelot and merlin are like off to commit regicide

however, on the way there, they are intercepted by a mysterious knight errant.......

episode eight.

MORGAUSE has been running around looking for morgana in a huge panic bc merlin popped up like a mushroom in the rain and somehow beat her to finding her

disguising herself as a knight, she challenges arthur to a fight. just like in the original episode, he accepts the challenge, and then loses the fight. morgause then reveals herself (eliciting gasps from both morgana and gwen) and invites him to a three-task quest to prove his valor.

multiple people try to stop arthur, but he insists it's a matter of his honour. everyone wants to come with, and he initially agrees, but then sneaks off on his own before dawn, determined to prove himself ALONE.

(merlin follows.)

the first task involves arthur getting a sword out of a rock. conveniently, there's one just nearby. arthur pulls excalibur out of stone, and he's almost content with achieving it ALONE when merlin bursts out of the bushes. merlin is committed to being anti-prophecy and so he's like arthur she's lying to you i just put this sword there in the rock the other day this doesn't count.

morgause comes back smirking then and reveals the second task, which is to hunt and kill a unicorn. merlin hates the idea and does everything he can do to convince arthur not to do it, even as they find one in the forest. arthur is torn, wanting to pass the quest, but ultimately cannot do it in face of merlin's indignance. he lowers his bow. the unicorn escapes, and morgause appears again beckoning them to the third task: finding their way out of a labyrinth.

after making their way through the labyrinth and a lot of complaining, arthur and merlin find themselves in a strange place by the sea. two goblets stand on the table. morgause reveals that one of them contains poison.

merlin tries to convince arthur not to drink the poison, but arthur is like you saved my life twice. merlin bristling: yeah don't let it go to your head. i wouldn't have to if you stopped getting yourself into these situations. they go on like this, but ultimately merlin still falls for the age old "look, there-!" and arthur chugs the "poison"

after a moment of dramatics with merlin clutching the unconscious arthur again, morgause reveals that the cup was not poisoned and that arthur passed the task.

finally, morgause is like alright fine pendragon you passed my riddles three. wouldst thou like to have tea with your mother.

episode nine.

on their way out of the labyrinth, morgause, arthur and merlin are apprehended by morgana, gwen and lancelot.

a lot of mutual distrust is still simmering - especially on morgana's side, as she has recognised morgause's voice from her visions - but eventually they all board the little boats to travel to the isle of the blessed to chat with the phantom of YGRAINE

ygraine, the icon she is, still uses her 5min window of existence to bitch about uther one more time for good measure and even sprinkles in a little bit of info about morgana’s mother and morgause being her sister just for a cuntier touch

only this time no one really has any objections so when arthur is like im going to KILL my DAD merlin is like [bites his lip] okay i guess u can have the favour of my magical dragon sword. if you wanted. [shrugs offhandedly]

before they set off for camelot, morgause invites morgana to stay with her to learn magic and eventually become a High Priestess. morgana is overwhelmed, and suddenly torn between a family member who claims her as opposed to uther, gwen who is throwing her shy looks, and merlin. she awkwardly tells morgause she will think about it and morgause gifts her the anti-nightmare bracelet.

afterwards, they set out for camelot.

given that there are people with braincells around this time round, instead of just charging at uther screaming murder, arthur shows up in front of the council and challenges him publicly, daring his father to deny his deeds or stand up in fight.

uther cannot deny his deeds in presence of morgause, and has no choice but to stand up in the fight.

arthur defeats uther: he wounds him but does not kill him, and instead banishes him from camelot.

(he will get enchanted and marry the troll catrina soon after and live out his days in a bog)

afterwards, arthur is crowned king. gwen and arthur come up with an arrangement and marry, and the queen guinevere has a consensual workplace relationship with the knight lancelot and the witch morgana (who is only at the castle part time, splitting her time between learning from morgause and accompanying merlin on adventures) both

soon enough, gwaine, elyan and percival make it to camelot.

and so the round table is formed, only this time everyone is considerably better off and less mentally ill.

as for merlin, he gets to both keep his friends and have his dragon adventures.

he and arthur also unite albion (yuck) or whatever.

the end.

[tarnishedspark]

Thinking about some ideas for the sort of ecosystem things that would need to exist on Cybertron for Transformers to have access to oil for joints, oil baths, etc. because of oil being an organic compound.

puttin in a show more thing bc this got Long

I'm thinking there's probably several different ways it comes about so its not like. Everything relies on the existence of the 1 magical oil machine.

Forged oil

When you think about it, bots don't immediately need an oil change as soon as they stumble out of the Well or a hotspot. The forging process probably synthesises oil for them the same way it creates the glass for their optics, liquids for their hydraulics, and whatever squidgy possibly-silicone bits they need for their internals to function. And if we assume all life on the planet is made this same way, then some of the supply woukd be made that way.

Microorganisms

What if there was some bacteria or something that could distil atmospheric carbon and water into complex hydrocarbons and eventually oil. Maybe it is a multi-stage process with a few different varieties. I imagine this would grow in gross-looking slime slicks, possibly floating on energon rivers or in places like the rust sea. Then simple mechanimals would consume the slime as part of their diet to supplement their oil reserves and it would progress through the food chain.

Cyber plants

Cybertron has some plant-like mechanical things, like seen in the Wastes in the idw2 Halloween special. There could be varieties of cyber plant that have processes to produce oil. Something at the nanotech level they have instead of photosynthesis and biological processes. If there's cyber plants that can produce oil, that would likely be tge most renewable/farmable source. and I need to move on from this before i start considering the chemical processes too closely

Mining

If Cybertron is the body of Primus and Primus is a giant transformer, then there's bound to be some oil in there somewhere. Don't ask me where it came from but he's gotta need it. Wherever Primus came from, I guess. There may be subsurface reservoirs of oil that modern transformers mine to meet the needs of the populace, much like our own oil mining

now i wanna use the plant and bug ideas for smth but i don't have anywhere it is Relevant atm

[rnajorarcana]

               ❛  can’t tell if i’m really here , i think i’m leaving this body -                                              bye - ye - ye - ye - ye !

                                                        oliver oli d’angelo . 23 . pan . he/they .                                                                              angel boy .                                                                              ( bullying , toxic relationships )

✧ ˖ * ° ><> ╱  ross lynch,  genderfluid,  he/they —  look  who’s  fresh  from  the  ferry,  aren’t  you  OLIVER  “ OLI "  D'ANGELO  ?  your  eroda  brochure  says  you’re  TWENTY - THREE  and  that  you’re  currently  residing  in  MARMOTON.  your  favourite  tourist  attraction  to  hang  around  is  SEA ROCK BREWERY,  and  the  locals  around  these  ports  would  describe  you  as  SILVER  TONGUED  &  CLEVER,  RETICENT  &  INSECURE.  your  resting  fish  face  really  gives  off  SHADES  OF  BLUE  REFLECTING  THE  SEAS  &  SKIES ,  TATTOO  INK  MIXED  WITH  GLITTER ,  THE  MAGIC  IN  HIS  VEINS  &  THE  DIAMONDS  IN  HIS  BONES  and  i’m  a  big  fan  of  the  DECK OF TAROT CARDS  you  seem  to  always  be  attached  to.  well,  if  you  see  the  minister  this  morning;  make  sure  you  head  on  home  as  quick  as  possible,  you  never  know  what  bad  luck  he  could  bring.

                       i . past

there is a saying that the amount of kind people in the world is diminishing ; and given exactly what you’ve been through , my dear boy ?? you could attest to that . kind people are forged in fire & have blood leaking from their mouths , given bruised knuckles and black eyes - yet here you are .

eroda born you grow up shy & quiet , gentle & sensitive - the type of kid that is easy to befriend if you talk to him but is equally as easy to shove into a locker . you are sketchpads & soft smiles but bruised cheeks & visits to the principal’s office and you’re told boys will be boys so there isn’t much the school boards can do about your constant harassment . you’re different than them because you don’t fit into their mold ; girls like you because you don’t pull their hair or make fun of them for being girls and that makes the other ones jealous , further worsening the treatment .

all you have is you , taking solace in the two things you know - artwork & video games . you imagine yourself as a gallant hero - like the one in the zelda games - riding alone but still kind & brave , and these drawings you make consist of both the characters from your comfort and yourself as such . you bury yourself in your nintendo ds , carrying it everywhere , and maybe one day you’ll be the link to a story where there’s a courageous hero needed and you can fill that slot . of course , your interests only contribute to the fact you’re seen as high school’s punching bag . you take it .

but things get different the one day you get pushed to the ground - because high school’s like that - and your beloved drawings get torn , your ds held from your grasp like a toy held from a jumping dog . and oli d’angelo , the ‘ angel boy ’ , with red lips & cherub cheeks & puppy eyes , decides he’s had enough and clocks his assailant back . principal’s office visit again , you’re suspended , but your darling mother ( she’s all you have ; your father strolled out the door before you could know him & the woman is a bit broken from hoping he could come back after all these years ) rubs your back , takes you out for ice cream , and tells you that you did the right thing .

doesn’t feel like it , since your limits were simply pushed .

graduation , art school , new horizons . oliver d’angelo meets trevor frost , and they instantly click , and with words exchanged across library tables and eventually kisses behind bookshelves , a budding romance is formed . he’s rich ; he even offers to pay for your tuition , but you fall in love with him because he looks at you like you are everything , but you don’t realize the wool pulled over your eyes - because you’re an angel who’s naive & innocent and he’s the monster that berates you & digs at you with even the most syrupy words , then lulls you into coming back . you spend your nights crying thinking you are to blame for things he’s done to you - finding he has more bedmates than just yourself , being accused of things that aren’t your fault or your doing . . . you are broken down , piece by piece , and once more . . . there’s a day where you can no longer take it .

screaming , hellfire , a broken angel finally breaks free of his chains and runs away , even though the monster tried to clip his wings . you pack up your things and leave , and you realize that your financial support is gone , but you need to get out . 

. . . this life , it’s tested your kindness & your patience - you’ve been tossed through the wringer endlessly , and as you leave his apartment , you make a resolution that you can no longer allow yourself to be hurt . you cannot be vulnerable .

you are now oli , and oli shows up to his high school reunion with a new air of confidence . obnoxious confidence , like a party boy - but he retains his charm , words of silver leaking from his lips and charisma among a crowd enough to bring in even those who treated him unkindly in the years prior . he becomes the LIFE OF THE PARTY , but he doesn’t actually want to be there . this new persona - this arrogance , this annoying voice , this being who participates in every vice possible . . . he is nothing like the sweet & gentle boy that lies underneath . but he’s a mask , a suit of armor that you carry - so you can numb yourself over the loneliness & hurt that’s plagued you over the years .

new horizons , take two . you complete a tattoo artist apprenticeship , get your license - ship yourself off to another chapter of your life that hopefully means things will change . you’re black clothes & sunglasses & tarot cards & tattoos , silver tongues and smiles that only signal mischief . long conversations and words flying a mile a minute because your mouth is your greatest weapon . the good thing is nobody here knows you . . . even though maybe , you’d want them to - but if you do , you run the risk of getting hurt again .

oliver gets hurt , but oli is a courageous hero ( maybe ) that can go up against anything needed . . . you can be oli for now , even though that hurts just as much . 

                      ii . present

SO OLI . . . god this is my son . this is my oc i’ve written forever and god do i love him . 

so !! he’s an artist , loves to draw , paint , etc , now employed as a tattoo artist ! and . . . he’s also . got a lot of bad habits since he’s got a party boy facade to keep up and tries to make himself into someone else since , who he actually is , he’s scared to be in fear of getting hurt again . 

on the inside , he’s sweet and gentle and introvereted - he doesn’t like big social gatherings and would much rather vibe on his own or with a few close friends ( if he had friends ) than anything else . but he’s afraid , again , of being himself or being vulnerable towards anyone else because he’s seen as an easy target , and his feelings are easy to manipulate . . . 

so on the outside , he’s much different . he’s fucking annoying , to start - he’s a talker , always has something to say , and he’s very good at keeping a conversation . he’s a charmer , and paired with his big brown eyes and his award winning smile he can talk a snake out of its basket . but he also , again , maybe says too much and doesn’t have any fear or realization of consequences , and indulges himself in things like alcohol , sleeping around , loud parties , etc . because that’s the persona that keeps him guarded . and he’s gotten used to it , but he doesn’t like that this is what he’s known for . he wants people to get to know him for him but . . . this is his only option , since if he lets people inside , he gets hurt . so he just has to deal . 

he’s that person that talks so much , you think he’s oversharing when in ACTUALITY he’s telling you nothing of importance . oli is fucking smart & intelligent and he knows how to read a room , how to pick his words - all survival techniques he’s learned from navigating the world around him . he’s . . . an expert at this social stuff , even tho tbh he much rather wouldn’t be . 

some ppl want to kiss him some ppl want to kick him it be like that sometimes

he’s still nice !! he’s very nice - but maybe a bit more crass and unafraid to say shit that you wouldn’t expect anyone else to say .

but also also it’s like i said before - he is very into artwork and video games , the latter especially being his huge comfort . first is his passion , second is his comfort . oli loves games and he’s lowkey nerdy as hell , even though he’s trying to conceal some parts of himself THAT always bleeds through in some shape or form . 

he’s also extremely into witchcraft , and that’s a major part of his character as well . he likes hanging at the brewery because it’s easy to get people who want tarot readings from him , and he always keeps a sigil or a crystal or something on his person . always has a water bottle of witch tea , always enchants his clothes or items , cleans his workspace at the tat parlor he works at with moonwater - that stuff . he’s known as two things - the angel boy or the magic boy . 

o also he’s genderfluid so rly any titles are valid for him , comfy with anything . diagnosed bipolar ii & adhd bc i’m a bitch that loves to project . 

HE’S . . . HE’S A GOOD BOY . he’s just . afraid to show that he’s a good boy . he’s got a heart of gold but he’s scared that if he shows it someone else is gonna use him again .

ANYWAYS !! like this n i , light , the bastard , will message u for plots !!

[pantrypressinc]

Have you heard of the wanderlust gene? Scientists discovered the existence of the DRD4-7R genome not long ago. They say that roughly 20% of us have it! Those 20% apparently possess a stronger urge to explore new places, ideas, foods, relationships and embrace adventure, movement and change. Also those who have this gene are more creative, more rebellious, and ever hungry for a new ways of seeing the world. Other traits inherent to the wanderlust gene include being impulsive and pro-risk. Of course, speaking from our personal experience, you have to be at least a little pro-risk to be self-employed for most of your adult life or to abandon a perfectly comfortable life at 50 plus years old to live in an 80 square foot van.

Okinawa, Japan 2010

Moray, Peru 2013

Grand Canyon 2013

Capri, Italy 2013

Athabasca Glacier, Alberta 2015

Lake Okanagan, BC 2015

Vancouver Island, BC 2015

Mount Rushmore 2016

We humans come from a long line of migrators and from cultures that moved almost constantly. Have you ever watched one of those videos that shows how people have moved around Europe the past couple hundred years? It’s fascinating to watch borders change, in some cases pretty dramatically. Norman Davies wrote a booktitled, Microcosm Portrait of a Central European City, where he uses the city of Breslau as a portrait of change and migration. It’s name has changed at least 12 times and been tossed back and forth between the Germans and Poles with many changes in ethnic majority over the course of 1,000 years. We both come from families with a history of migration and travelling great distances.

Our case for possessing the wanderlust gene:

Julie:

When I was in grade one my maternal grandfather, Vladamir Nedin, told me that our family in Romania were gypsies. I was so excited to share this news with my friends and classmates that show and tell could not have come soon enough.

Julie’s Grade One Class Photo, middle row, 8th from the left

At 6 years old I began imagining the truly exciting life my eastern European family were sure to be living. I have no doubt that my grandfather’s stories fuelled my own wanderlust. He left everyone he knew and loved in Romania at 19 years old and walked the breadth of Europe over the course of a year. I imagine it was during this time that he learned to speak Hungarian, Yiddish, Italian, German, French and English, the definition of a polyglot. He wore through countless pairs of shoes and slept in barns in all the countries between Romania and Belgium, eventually boarding a ship in Antwerp bound for Quebec, Canada. From Quebec he travelled by train to Regina, Saskatchewan where he was welcomed by a community of Serbians. It is here that he met and married my grandmother, Julka Yakovlev, who with her parents and sister emigrated from Serbia.

First Serbian Orthodox Church in Canada, Regina Saskatchewan; my great grandparents were founding members

Of course that is just one story passed down of immigration in my family. As is typical of most Canadians, all of my family came from somewhere else. On my father’s side they emigrated from Ireland, Scotland and Austria.

Russell Gibb, in his late 80s

Vlada Nedin, in his 60s

As a kid I loved hearing travel stories from various members of my family. My paternal grandfather, Russell Gibb, had a penchant for riding the rails in the United States. My favourite story involved him losing his identification which turned up in the possession of a dead man. Unfortunately, for a period of time his family thought him to be dead but instead he was mistakenly doing time in Georgia on a chain-gang.

Julie’s mom, Christine (on right), and her friend, Donna (on left)

At eighteen, my mom, Christine, and her best friend travelled from Detroit to San Francisco by train. I am sure that I never saw my mom more happy than when she shared stories of this journey.

Julie with her brother, Rusty, and father, Bill, in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee; approx. 1974

My dad, Bill, possessed a desire to travel and explore and an eagerness to document these experiences for as long as I can remember.

Postcard to Julie’s grandparents, 1973

I went on my first airplane at ten years old. My parents let me fly from Windsor to see my best friends who were spending the summer in North Bay. By twelve years old I dreamt each night of the day I would leave my hometown and of the places I would travel. For me, dreams of my future included going to university, travelling extensively and being self-employed. Lucky for me, I am able to share all of these dreams and more with the best person I know.

Travel labels on Sig Munoz’s suitcase

Christian:

Signono Carlos Munoz was my maternal great-grandfather. The story goes that he made his way from Chile to St. Louis, Missouri where he met my great-grandmother, Nannie Redman. Once married they settled and raised their family in Montclair, New Jersey. Sig, as he was known, seemed to be a wheeler and dealer from a very young age.

Young Signono Munoz, the cowboy

Menu from Grand Hotel Hungaria

Older Signono Munoz, the businessman

Turns out he even owned a railway – the Santa Fe Central Railroad. I found out recently that once while he was in Santa Fe, New Mexico playing poker, he won the rights to drill for oil on Navajo land when it was still the wild west. There is a treasured family photo of Sig, looking very much the cowboy, taken, we have been told, while bunk mates at the Bell Ranch, near Tucumcari, with the infamous, Billy the Kid. In his twenties he bought into a gold mine, started boiler companies, and later owned among other companies, the Cosmopolitan Shipping Company, the Federal Export Corporation and a steel mill in Pittsburgh. He travelled extensively throughout his life by ship, train, horseback and automobile.

Santa Fe Central Railroad

Henry Rollins – A great way to learn about your own country is to leave it. 

  Christian’s grandfather, James Redman Munoz

Sig’s son, my grandfather, James Redman Munoz, followed in his entrepreneurial travelling father’s footsteps. Most of the stories I know of my grandfather’s exploits were related to me by my parents. I found a journal he kept when he was just nineteen years old, while serving as Purser aboard the S.S. Indradeo. The log details excursions through the West Indies, Hong Kong, Shanghai and Ceylon (now known as Sri Lanka), etc. The journal entries aren’t all pleasant and also contain strong, often racist language in reference to the different cultures he encounters.

James Munoz diary entry while Purser on SS Indradeo, 1911

Journal entry dated Tuesday, June 27th, 1911 – Hong Kong

We went ashore this morning and stayed until evening. The European buildings here are very handsome. Also the various statues. The streets (in the English section) are wide and well paved. I took the trolley up to the peak and had a fine view of the harbour and the country but could not see very far because of the clouds. (includes an illustration of Hong Kong and Kowloon)

Journal entry dated Wednesday, August 16th, 1911 – Woosung, Shanghai

The plague is getting quite bad here. Both the Bubonic and Pneumonic. The American doctor has not allowed any of the sailors, firemen or cooks ashore, however he hasn’t stopped us yet. I don’t hardly think he will.

Journal entry dated Thursday, August 17th, 1911 – Woosung, Shanghai

They are killing a Chinaman (sic) in the native city this week. He is a priest and killed another in a row. They have him in a big wooden cage on wheels with wooden stocks around his neck which (the former) hang from the top of the cage. The toes of his feet just touch the top of a pile of bricks on the bottom of the cage. However, after about 24 hours his neck has stretched enough for him to stand on the bricks. They then knock another brick away and continue the process until he is dead. They have him in front of the gates of the native city for the day and then move him onto the next entrance. (includes an illustration of the rolling cage with a figure)

My father, Angus, fought and survived World War II. Having learned to fly in the army, he and a friend started Atlas Aviation upon returning to Ottawa after the war. He continued to work in aviation for the rest of his life. He is, in fact, an inductee in the Canadian Aviation Hall of Fame. My brother, Jamie, followed in his footsteps and became a pilot and spent many years flying in Africa and in the arctic.

Wanderlust: An irresistibly strong desire to wander or travel.

The truth is it doesn’t actually boil down to a single gene, but for romantics like us these scientific findings make us feel connected to the nomads in our own ancestry and are an easy explanation for our sometimes impulsive, spontaneous, risky decision-making and deep-seated need to travel to new places.

Us with Annie and Elia at Versailles, France 2006

  Our case for possessing the Wanderlust Gene Have you heard of the wanderlust gene? Scientists discovered the existence of the DRD4-7R genome not long ago.