#bc its 8:30 at night and i dont know how to fucking ask for a letter and frankly i dont wanna stress about that atm

[ambersky0319]

goddamn rec letter requirements 😭

[phagodyke]

I have to be up for work in 3 hours and I'm gonna be real I think ive hit the point where I might not be getting any sleep at all. for fucks sake.

[nathank77]

11/16/24

8:45 a.m

I'm glad I looked into her eyes. It's stupid but it made a difference and made me less negative and feel safer. I know she cares about me even if I never hear from her again bc actions speak louder than words.

Anyways i ended up smoking a cigarette bc after being awake for 2 hours my nicotine withdrawal got so bad it was just a I have to otherwise I stand absolutely no chance of falling asleep at this point. My arms hurts like a bitch, my shoulders too so that made sleeping harder too bc I wouldn't take ibuprofen bc I took Melatonin... they can interact... maybe I should take Ibuprofen in a little bit. I guess they can cause a raise in blood pressure.. so I hardly ever take it unless I skip Melatonin.

Anyways after my cigarette and my tv turned off after 30 minutes of listening to it, i laid in the fake silence and eventually I must have fallen asleep. If I had to estimate how much sleep I got not including before I woke up, it was maybe 1 hour and 30 minutes maximum. Making me have gotten about 5 hours if I passed out by 11 p.m last night. Which is reasonable I did pass out very quickly.

I didn't end up taking any other drugs to help me. I was planning my morning. Making eggs, starting laundry and just watching TV all day. I did have a weird dream. A couple. One of them she was in but I dont remember much other than her blocking me and I woke up wanting to check bc I woke up in a panic bc she changed into a new person I didn't know and I said, Nathan it was a dream and if she did seeing it now will only make sure you don't fall back to sleep but she prob didn't. We can check when my alarms go off...

The other dream was weird a huge house i was moving into with a spiral staircase in the middle and 4 floors. It was gorgeous. I don't remember much about it besides going up the stairs that were in the middle of each room.

Idk what I'm going to do.. bc I looked up why would someone have a hard time falling back to sleep. I mean I just have a hard time falling asleep ingeneral and it says a sleep disorder. I prob should eventually ask to see a sleep specialist for a sleep study.. but I dont want someone else taking over my xanax. I know it sounds stupid but my Dr is fucking reliable. I'll be getting xanax as long as I dont pick up early or abuse my prescription until I'm fucking dead. If she left my office, my script would transfer to someone else in her office and id get a new primary. I really have a good thing with my xanax script. Reliable is the word. So long as I don't call in days early asking for it I'm never going to lose it.

A lot of Dr's make addicts out of their benzo patients sending them to rehab by discontinuing the script and I don't want my xanax from anyone except my primary bc I'm not joking when I'm 80 I will still be getting that same script as long as I keep doing what I'm doing.

If I see a sleep specialist then they are taking over for my chronic condition inwhich I see my primary every 3 months for... and they could take it over... and I'm terrified of them not being reliable. Of them making me have to go to rehab bc of it. Finding a dr to percribe my script reliably is fucking hard.

But yea i know i prob have a sleep disorder. Despite that I know if I could smoke weed then id sleep like a baby every night and fall back asleep easily every night for the rest of my life. And I'm not 100% sure I want to know what my sleep disorder is. It could make it harder to fall asleep. It could scare me. It could give me anxiety.

I control caffeine intake. When I had my cigarette at 5 a.m I had Powerade with it no caffeine. I cut myself off of caffeine at a certian hour every day... I also know that the shows i listen to when I try to fall asleep don't help even at low volumes bc I either can't hear it and I hallucinate anyway or parts of the show gets louder... I've been watching the impossible game show bc its boring and mostly low. I'm never watching American dad again it really wasn't the best show for sleep.

So I know my sleep environment isn't great bc I'm always trying to make my auditory hallucinations get drown out. But yea that's how i feel today, tired af and sore from my workout. I got to take Ibuprofen soon but at the same time I want to feel the pain to know how badly I fucked myself up or to feel the normal muscle pain so that I don't numb it bc I want to know if I overdid it. If that makes sense.

I'm not sure I'm up for a red bull day bc of the lack of sleep... I may just do laundry and take a shower and have a red bull day tomorrow but I got to make up my mind... video games require much energy... and I may not have it bc of my lack of sleep...

Mom still hasn't heard back from the rescue. I may reach out myself. She showed me her phone proving she called and left a message.... but I still got a contact there maybe i can speed it along. I got to get Riley out of here.

Id play silent hill but she's going to barking all day and even still it's a lot of energy, more than just doing laundry... even though that is too... I got to clean the dryer if I do laundry... but i mean 5 minutes and that's done. Concentrating on a game all day is hard. But cleaning the dryer will hurt my muscles...

Idk i had more to say but I forgot

[ushiwakaout]

I-bRO your what the Haikyuu bois would say is so awesome! Could I request that but for Kuroo? I'm literally such a simp for the roosterhead! Thanks so much ♡

Thank you 🥺 that means a lot.

i love kuroo ��� i hate fannon kuroo ngl, so many people think he’s a sex god (well even cannon kuroo is probably a sex god once he figures out how to work his willy but u know) and he’s honestly just a dumb chem nerd.

Let us just say that you work for him as a personal assisten 

Warnings: HAIYUUU TIMESKIP

“Hey, honey... Breakfast is ready.” (5:00 am)

“No dont worry, i didnt make it... You know I cant cook to save my life.”

“I just went down the street to buy you a coffee and some sweet bread.”

“You always wake up earlier than I do to get me something, so i just thought to repay you back...”

“Why do you always think there is a catch?”

“Fine, you caught me... I need you to help me make an itinerarie for our upcoming not-so-vacation, vacation.”

“I would have told you yesterday but we where, busy~”

“Ow! Do not hit me, I’m your boss.”

You: “More the reason!”

“More the reason my ass, hurry up and get ready, we gotta get to the office.”

“Oh yeah, we also have meetings all day today so wear something comfortable.”

“You ready to go?” (6:30 am)

“Give me a little twirl baby.”

*will slap you ass when you pass him to leave your home*

*he is def laughing past you and you’re like alright bet*

you: “Hey baby come here, give me a kiss”

“Oh now you wanna give me a kiss, you gotta reach for it, honey ~ ”

*you pull on his tie so he’s at level for a kiss but you only give him a peck before giving his ass a good smack and running to the passanger side of his car*

“Hey! Get back here, I want a decent kiss!”

“Who tought you how to smack so hard?”

“Me? I would never~”

“Come on give me a good kiss.”

“I’m gonna park the car, you go ahead and get a head start without me.”(7:30 am)

you: “What took you so long?”

“What do you mean what took me so long, I was getting you flowers”  

*gives you the bouque of flowers and kiss on the cheek*

“Duh honey~”

“Stop blushing and lets get to work.” (8:00 am)

“Have you seen my pen?”

“Can you go get me some water?”

“Come on give me a kiss before we get to the next meeting.”

“Hey, just because their an assistant doesn’t mean you get to boss them around like that.”

“Says who? You ’re fucking boss and her husband you dibshit- get out my office and I want you to apologize, but don’t you dare look in their eyes because a low life like you doesn’t deserve to.” 

“Oh and ask her to come back in, will you?”

“Hey honey, is it lunch yet?”

you: “You did not have to be so rude...”

“Didn’t have to be rude, my ass. No one gets to talk down to you like that- not even me... Well, I do... But only if you want me too~”

*he do be leaning in for a kiss but you shove your hand onto his face*

you: “Whatchu want for lunch Testu and do not say me because I will quit.” 

“Awe.. Honey you’re no fun...”

HE HAS ONE HUNDRESS PERCENT EATEN YOU KNOW OUT IN HIS OFFICE, HES MADE YOU CUM DURRING MEETINGS AND HAS MADE YOU SIT ON HIS COCK WHILE ON CONVERENCE CALLS AGHHHHH

“Just order me something and get it to go because we don’t have time to go out right now, I’ll make it up to you next time tho.”

“It’s just Y/n with my lunch. Let them in will ya?” (1:00 pm)

“Hey, honey...*whispers* book me an appointment with my chiro will ya? My back is definetly gonna need it... Do it for friday night since we have the weekend off.”

“You’re dismissed.”

*will pat you your thigh before you walk out the door*

*is a very firm believer of not teasing you around co-workers. no pda around the office unless it’s his and the blinds are shut and the door is locked*

“Honey~ let me take a nap on your lap.I’ve got thirty minutes and I’m tired.” (2:30 pm)

“Hey- We have a dinner meeting so I need you to go home, freshen up and get me a new suit- I’ll get ready in the gym bathrooms, I’ll be fine.”

“Let me know when you’re on the way so I can just take a quick wash- hold on give me a kiss before you go.” (3:20 pm)

“You’re on the way back? Pick me up some iced coffee, yeah?”

“You here? Hold on let me put on a towel.” (6:00 pm)

“What you lookin’ at?”

“Oh? Sorry- I’ll cover up~”

“You look real sexy by the way... Give me a kiss.”

“Mmm, if I keep kissing you, were gonna have to head home right now baby~”

you: “Tetsuro, this meeting is literraly about keeping your company and making it a bigger establishment... We are not gonna drop it to go fuck.”

“But honey~”

*smaking the back of his head*

you: “I will leave you high and dry next time you try it.”

*Kuroo def becomes a little pouty after you say that*

*while at dinner a conversation about you breaks through while youre in the restroom*

“So, you’re married to your assistant... How’s that like?” The man in front of him asked, with his own wife absent at the moment. “Oh, um... They’re really great- Y/n a great partner and theirs nothing more I could ask for.” He man scoffs before taking a drink, “Did they work for you before you got marries?” Kuroo nods, “I met them a fem years ago during a one on one interview, they have been working with me ever since.” The executive nodded, clearing his throat. “They a good fuck?” He asked, shocking Kuroo. “Excuse me?” He asked, making sure he didn’t hear him incorrectly. “I asked, are they a good fuck. Someone like that seems too good for our work, bet their probably a sleazy bitch who-” Kuroo go up from his seat a reached over to grab the mans collar. “Speak of my spouse with that manner ever again and i wont hesitate to ruin your life. You know what they learned about you before we got here. They found out that you’re having an affair- and they just happen to be pregnant... Seems to me that your hush money wasn’t enough. How about we tell your wife and kids that you just happened to start a new, hidden, life without them.” Little to Kuroos knowledge you where a few steps behind the table and happen to hear everything your husband had just threatened to spill. “Tetsuro...” You mumbled, setting your hand on his shoulder. “Sit down...” You looked back at the executive and smiled sadisticly, “You heard my husband... Finding about your second life wasn’t so hard.. Maybe I could send it to your wife in a matter of seconds if you don’t get up from this table, agree to our side of the contract and then leave. We’d like to enjoy our dinner in peace.”

“How much did you hear?”

“Right... Let’s just forget this ever happened and enjoy the dinner we deserve.”

“That was so, so, delicious” (8:00 pm)

“Did you enjoy your dinner?”

“Good, let’s get a bottle to go, yeah?”

“Home, sweet fucking home.”

“Come here, we’ll open the bottle later.”

*ya’ll accidentally fall asleep on the couch bc you guys work so hard together... its a cute sight*

Extra:

you: “Kuroo wake up, someones trying to get in.”

“No one is trying to break in.”

Kenma: “No she’s right I was trying to break in... I forgot my switch charger here and I need it.”

More of Husband Kuroo: here

[onemillionvolts]

GM CYNO

what if i told you every single question in the ask game should be answered, that or WHO IS THE SEXUEST PERSIN THAT COMES TO MIND IMMEDIATELY

GOOD MORNING HI HI. BET. im gonna do all of them you bet i wont but i will. youre the best for this btw

IMMEDIATELY? PFFFF HOW LONG DO U HAVE LET ME GET MY LIST

0. height

i yam 5 foot 6 (and a half)

1. virgin?

what the fuck did you just call me? /lhj

anyways in my head yes i am and thats what matters isnt it

2. shoe size

i wear 11s and god i wish that thing people say about shoe size was true 🤙

3 + 4 + 5. do you smoke/drink/do drugs

no and i never plan to <33

6. age you get mistaken for

i.. honestly have no answer to this tbh

7 + 8. do you have (and/or want) any tattoos?

i don't have any, i'd like one/some but i'm not really sure what i'd get

9 + 10. do you have/want any piercings

no to both PFFFF i think like... a clip on lip piercing would probably be my personal limit

11. best friend

...ego stroker much, tumblr user wangshu? /t PFFFFF

12. relationship status

harem with fake 2d men single. yeah uh. single

13. biggest turn ons

tbh... i cant think of any off the top of my head that aren't painfully obvious

14. biggest turn offs

ducklips iykyk

15. favorite movie

i'm not kidding when i say step brothers. but if you want a more respectable answer, nightmare before christmas

16. i'll love you if

you aren't an asshole??? i mean ik it's hypocritical of me to say but cmon

17. someone you miss

i've lost a lot of family over the years so probably someone there tbh

18. most traumatic experience

when my ex lived with me and i wish i was joking it was that fucking bad

19. A fact about your personality

which one /hj

i do think.. i overcompensate a lot by trying to be funny bc i dont feel like i HAVE a personality so there's that about me

20. What i hate most about myself

mm thats a toughie it could be the appearance or the voice or the attachment issues or the codependency issues or the jealousy issues or the mood swings or the weak immune system or the several mental illnesses or holy shit this is turning into a pity party

21. what i love most about myself

im an alright writer i guess? and id like to think i'm a good friend

22. what i want to be when i get older

i just wanna write man idc what

23. my relationship with my sibling(s)

i have 0 of them

24. my relationship with my parents

my moms cool but the less said about my dad the better

25. my idea of the perfect date

literally just staying in and watching a movie with snacks and stuff... honestly never thought about it much

26. My biggest pet peeves

UM UM um people who think the world revolves around them people who don't know the difference between their there and they're um people who Unironically Capitalize Every Word Like This oh i could go on

27. a description of the person i like

big hat dumb bowlcut open kimono /j

28. description of the person i dislike the most

um literally jusr my dad so. narcissistic explosive annoying abusive etc etc

29. A reason i've lied to a friend

only time i'm lyin is when i say tiggy ain't best boy 💯

30. what i hate most about work/school

it kinda semi interferes w my night owl ways but otherwise i'm chill

31. what your last text message says

gonna use actual texts cause using disc is too easy 👹 it was just me asking my mom if she wanted a drink from mcdonalds from last sunday

32. what words upset me the most

does this mean like. just words you hate or a phrase/sentence that upsets u...

uh i'll do it both ways. the word bussin makes me want to fall down an abyss a la childe ajax tartaglia

and uh. i hate being told i don't do enough, specifically by people who don't do jack shit in the first place. AGAIN iykyk

33. what words make me feel best abt myself

oh it was the second thing. honestly don't hve an answer to this but i just hold onto any compliment i get for actual years so there's that about me

34. what i find attractive in women

eyes its eyes

35. what i find attractive in men

sense of humor tbh

36. where i would like to live

somewhere close to a big city so that it isn't massively crowded and loud and overwhelming all the time but i'm close enough to stores and hospitals and all that stuff

37. One of my insecurities

i feel like this has already been asked in like 6 different ways.. prolly my body tho

38. my childhood career choice

honestly i've.. always been kinda laughably indecisive about this type of thing. i never wanted to be like, an astronaut or fireman or any of the cliche stuff that kids talk about i.. don't think i ever thought of it actually

39. my favorite ice cream flavor

cookies n cream 👹 specifically like a cookies n cream cheesecake blizzard from like dq or culvers.. that shit is unmatched

40. Who i wish i could be

a mentally stable person or cyno genshin (real)

41. where i want to be right now

in bed <///3

42. the last thing i ate

leftover pizza <3

43. SEXIEST PERSON THAT COMES TO MIND IMMEDIATELY

TIGHNARI FINAL ANSWRR I DONT PERCEIVE REAL PEOPLE

44. a random fact about anything

all odd numbers contain the letter E

GOLLY THIS WAS SO FUN.

[radiotorn]

TF2 ASK MEME... THE EVENS

DAMN HOMIE‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ thank u ok under the cut bc it's a lot:)

2- Who is your favorite mercenary? Mmeehehhehehehe Demoman :] i kiss him and rotate him in my brain

4- Do you have a favorite tf2 pet? If so then who? oh my god ARISTOTLE!!!!!!! I don't care if it's not canon or whatever i love spys bird so much i want you to all look at this bird

6- If you are in the fandom, how did you get into the fandom? Im not really in the fandom besides occasionally drawing the mercs im just in my little bubble of mutuals who are the only right people about any of the characters. everyone else can stay quiet though

8- Did you find out about tf2 by the game, sfms or the comics first? None! i found out abt the game YEARS ago From this YouTube poop, used as a flipnote i cant find anymore. But from there, it was the "Meet The" videos i must of stumbled upon randomly???

10- Favorite quote from the Meet the… videos? engies "best hope…not pointed at you" bc i remember being like !!!! :OOO!!! FUCK!!! thats badass . when i first watched it

12- Favorite quote from the comics? okay it probably doesn't count but its one that sticks its the screen on admins monitors waayy back in the beginning that say "miss pauling. hide." sticks with me bc it is just a little haunting like…. :)

14- Do you have any OTP(s)? if so then what? hmm…i like a lot of pairings but ones that i find extra nice and awesome is swordvan, spy and heavy (idk their name but they r criminally underrated and i enjoy them together), engie and demo(i also dont know their name cries) and boots n bombs. sniperspy is fun sometimes tho

16- Do you have a BROTP? if so then what? i LOVE pyro and heavy ok i think they are the best like they. i cannot even put it into words they're everything to me. scout and sniper are also buddies too

18- Favorite headcanon? this is extremely self indulgent and like not backed by anything but pyro is hungarian and mexican. this is so true to me forever and ever. i also really like the hc that soldier enjoys painting

20- Do you have a favorite tf2 fanfiction? If so, what is it? Oh my god i will link it to you RIGHT MEOW!!! Tori u already know but to anyone else pls give it a read and check out this authors other works they fuck

22- Do you have any tf2 ocs? If so, then tell us about them!! IIII DO! I won't go into too much detail, but i have The Horticulturist(Horti) and The Pathfinder(PF). Both are Hungarian, Horti is involved with agriculture/plants/etc and PF is an ex-aperture employee with memory issues and menthal illness plaguing him all the time that makes sure battlegrounds r safe to fight on and that their base isn't falling apart they're strung together by spaghetti noodles

24- What is your favorite (official or unofficial) SFM? this, this or this

26- What is your favorite tf2 comic? i think blood in the water bc of just how much fking happens but also idk i like all of them a lot. especially 7 :')

28- Is there a character you hated at first but now you love? not particularly there is still hatred in my soul for c!heavy always

30- Which character is underrated? Demo, Heavy and Soldier. We all know this FAR too well :| it's a damn shame because i love all of them so so SO much especially demo he's my husband i kiss him every day and night

32- Who was your favorite character when you first got into the fandom? Did it change? Oh Yeah. My fav at the start was Medic, and then it shifted to Sniper, and now it's Demo/Heavy <3 though i frankly find myself loving all of tha mercs they all make me smile

34- Favorite moment from the comics? seeing admin all decrepit and dying bc she looks very gorgest to me. or when sniper gets shot because my god? or when we see engie at all. i love him. i always wished they did more with pyro in the comics tho :(

36- Do you have a favorite AU? What is it? I'm not sure??? I haven't seen too many AU's besides like monster or aquatic or freaks if they even count. though i guess technically qu/azies po/otis vids are an au so that for sure!!!!!!!

38- What is your favorite cosmetic? i would say Aristotle again but i mentioned it earlier soooo perhaps the seared sorcerer for pyro …but COMBINED with discovision!!! you wish you were me (me pictured below)

[stressed-crow]

i didnt exactly get tagged, but @lieberts​ said the “whoever wants to do it” thing (like 4 moths ago but i just found it in my likes) so here i goooo

also i tag @krchov​ @cowardlylearningtobebrave​ @feathereddamsel​ @gruntie​ and @luwucifer-s​ but like, only very vaguely. feel free not to~

1. MUSIC TAG MEME 

Rules: Post your first twenty songs in a playlist on shuffle

Mama (My Chemical Romance)

Stigma (BTS)

Man Who Sold The World (Nirvana)

End of Spring (ONEWE)

Love Maze (BTS)

I’m so afraid (Holland)

Dear my friend (agustd)

O-O-H Child (The Five Stairsteps)

Go Go (BTS)

Time is Running out (The Muse)

Movement (Hozier)

Les Passants (Zaz)

The Witching Hour (ODJBOX)

Feelings (Hayley Kiyoko)

0X1=LOVESONG (txt)

YAYAYA (Stray Kids)

Empire (Of Mice and Men)

Problems (Mother Mother)

Question (Stray Kids)

Kill Your Heroes (AWOLNATION)

(i do not take any criticism on my music taste, least of all a costructive one)

2. Rules: MAKE A NEW POST, bold what applies to you and tag whoever you want to get to know better.

APPEARANCE 

I’m an I-need-to-pull-the-driver-seat-all-the-way-in kind of a person // i wear glasses or contacts // i have blonde hair // i prefer loose clothing to tight clothing  // i have one or more piercings // i have at least one tattoo  // i have blue eyes // i have dyed or highlighted my hair // i have gotten plastic surgery // i have or had braces // i sunburn easily // i have freckles // i paint my nails // i wear makeup // i don’t often smile // i am pleased with how I look // I prefer nike to adidas // i wear baseball hats backward

HOBBIES & TALENTS 

i play a sport // i can play an instrument  // i am artistic  // i know more than one language // i have won a trophy in some sort of competition // i can cook or bake without a recipe // i know how to swim // i enjoy writing // i can do origami // i prefer movies to tv shows // i can execute a perfect somersault // i enjoy singing // i could survive in the wild on my own (if it was like... chill wildreness. i mean i can get a fire going and shit like that i cant fistfight a bear or whatever) // i have read a new book series this year // i enjoy spending time with friends // i travel during school or work breaks // i can do a handstand

RELATIONSHIPS 

i am in a relationship // i have a crush // i have a best friend i have known for ten years // my parents are together // i have dated my best friend // i am adopted // my crush has confessed to me // i have a long-distance relationship // i am an only child // i give advice to my friends // i have made an online friend // i met up with someone i have met online

AESTHETIC 

i have heard the ocean in a conch shell // i have watched the sunrise // i enjoy rainy days // i have slept under the stars // i meditate outside // the sound of chirping calms me // i enjoy the smell of the beach // i know what snow tastes like // i listen to music to fall asleep // i enjoy thunderstorms // i enjoy cloud watching // i have attended a bonfire // i pay close attention to colors // i find mystery in the ocean (i dont like it tho the sea scares me) // i enjoy hiking on nature paths // autumn is my favourite season

MISC 

i can fall asleep in a moving vehicle // i am the mom friend // i live by a certain quote // i like the smell of sharpies // i am involved in extracurricular activities // i enjoy mexican food // i can drive a stick-shift  // i believe in true love // i make up scenarios to fall asleep // i sing in the shower // i wish i lived in a video game // i have a canopy above my bed // i am multiracial // i am a redhead // i own at least one dog // i have a cat ---------

3. THIS OR THAT TAG GAME (1)

sage green or baby blue | moon or stars | paperback or hardback | piercings or tattoos (i want a new one... both piercing and tattoo) | drawing or writing | saturn or jupiter | line without a hook or mr. loverman (what does this mean??) | ancient greece or ancient egypt | prague (yo i live here thats wild) or amsterdam | dark academia or light academia | indie aesthetic or cottagecore | stargazing or late night drives | strawberries or watermelons | rings or necklaces | extrovert or introvert | dragons or griffins | ocean or mountain | silver or gold | dawn or dusk | creative or free spirit | early bird or night owl | cook or bake | dagger or sword ---------

4. THIS OR THAT TAG GAME (2)

indoor plants or gardens // cloud-watching or star-gazing // water or fire // paperback or hardcover // running or hiking // sleeping with socks or without socks // fruit or vegetables // hanging plants or succulents // dark wood or light wood // handwritten or typed // instagram or pinterest (i dont do either) // braids or pigtails // books or movies // oceans or meadows // forests or fields // sweet or salty // ice cream or chocolate // hoodies or sweaters // long hair or short hair // piercings or tattoos (new!! both!!) // summer or winter (both suck) // boots or sneakers // cars or motorcycles // curls or straight hair // castles or cottages // sunny days or storms // reptiles or birds // disney or nickelodeon (am european) // strawberries or watermelon (im using this opportunity to pick the other one yes) // essays or posters // phones or laptops // glass or stone // dark or light // photos or paintings // circuses or theaters // reading or writing // dogs or cats // poetry or novels // monsters or ghosts // thrift shops or libraries // fiction or non-fiction

5. Post one picture from my camera roll (no new downloads) to sum up my personality! u get two bcs they are v good

6. 30 QUESTIONS TAG GAME 

RULES: Answer 30 questions and tag others

Name/Nickname: lucy 

Gender: female 

Star Sign: leo

Height: 170 cm 

Time: 22:04 

Birthday: july 1  IS WHAT I WROTE INITIALLY bcs i cant fucking read and thought it just said “date” lol anyway its 11th of August

Favorite Bands: bts, stray kids :)

Favorite Solo Artists: sunmi, taemin :) and hozier i cant betray him 

Song stuck in my head: la la la la vie en rose

Last Movie: def some horror movie but i forget which lol

Last Show: probably the untamed lmaooo did not even finnish it 

When did I create this blog: december 2013 apparently 

What do I post: kpop babey 

Last thing googled: i gotta fact check lots of shit for work so probs smting sports related (but make no mistake i dont know a single thing abt sports) 

Other blogs: what for i dump everything here

Do I get asks: no

Why I chose my url: self-explanatory

Following: 100

Followers: ???

Average hours of sleep: about 8 hours 

Instruments: none 

What am I wearing: pink pajama shorts with kitties, black shirt torn beyond decent wearability and this dark green... jacket,,, hoodie...thing.

Dream job: village witch 

Dream trip: me @ japan: 

(i was supposed to go study there starting winter 2020 :) im abt to lose my fucking mind :) so yeah you get a dead meme for this) also new zealand, iceland, and going back to sweden sometime

Favorite food: pizza bithc its versatile, also cereal coz im a child

Nationality: czech (rip) 

Favorite song: black swan (bts), levanter (skz), take me to church (hozier), noir (sunmi) (those are from the top of my head current favs theres way more but here u go)

Last book read: MIMOZEMŠŤANÉ V ČECHÁCH (= aliens in czechia) by idk, some married couple thats probs wanted whatever xfiles had but low budget, its pure nonsense, best read of this year, dont regret a single second

 Top three fictional universes I’d like to live in: magnus archives bich i dont give a fuck; middle earth to blaze it with hobbits; i wanna be one of those lil shaky-head-tree-things in mononokehime

[hufflautia]

hI this is a tOTALLY ANONYMOUS PERSON ASKING. and i am asking u to answer everything on here😌

lmajfniasnf yall i forced menna to send me this ask and i was kinda kidding but also a bit serious but also kinda kidding- ok anwyas here we go 

(1) Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed? closed 

(2) Do You Have Freckles? no 

(3) Can You Whistle? yes

(4) Last Song You Listened To. “Needed Me” by Rihanna

(5) What Is Your Favourite Colour? grayish green

(6) Relationship Status. in love with loki<3! 

(7) What Is The Temperature Right Now? cold, my fingers are cold and menna knows this 

(8) Did You Wake Up Cranky? no i did not, quite the opposite actually! 

(9) How Many Followers? around 650 

(10) Zodiac Sign. taurus

(11) What Is Your Eye Colour? brown

(12) Take A Vitamin Daily? yea

(13) Do You Sing In The Shower? usually 

(14) What Books Are You Reading? no book bc i have no brain cells 

(15) Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14. 

“i cannot imagine,” replied the scarecrow; “but we can go and see.” -the wonderful wizard of oz! i forgot i had that book, i got it from library for school last year but then quarantine hit and i couldn't return it bc the library closed 

(16) Favourite Anime? i barely watch anime, so i guess “Attack on Titans”, being that its one of the few animes I've watched

(17) Last Person You Cried In Front Of? my math teacher 

(18) Do You Collect Anything? only the souls of the innocent. also chapstick. 

(19) What Did You Have For Lunch? wontons that fucked my stomach up bc the meat was not cooked properly :D don't we love that?????????????!!!!!!

(20) Do You Dance In The Car? not rlly 

(21) Favourite Animal? dog 

(22) Do You Watch The Olympics? no 

(23) What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed? usually 11 or 12- depends on day

(24) Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now? no 

(25) Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean? pool 

(26) Favourite Tumblr Blog? clandestineloki

(27) Bottled Water Or Tap Water? i don't care as long as its safe

(28) What Makes You Happy? my siblings, my best friends, loki, tom hiddleston

(29) Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.

i saw this and thought it was a good fit but then i realized it was too calm so

(30) Do You Study Better With Or Without Music? without

(31) Dogs Or Cats? DOGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

(32) If You Were A Crayon What Colour Would You Be? yellow 

(33) PlayStation Or Xbox. i don't care

(34) Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean? I've never swam in a lake before, so lake

(35) Do You Believe In Magic? yea

(36) What Colour Shirt Are You Wearing? gray

(37) Can You Curl Your Tongue? no 

(38) Do You Save Money Or Spend It? depends

(39) Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You? yes 

(40) Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now? of course, loki will always be an obsession of mine bruh 

(41) Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly? nO BC IM SCARED OF BUTTERFLIES 

(42) Are You Easily Influenced By Other People? yes:’( 

(43) Do You Have Strange Dreams? of course

(44) Do You Like Going On Airplanes? yes 

(45) Name One Movie That Made You Cry. ParaNorman

(46) Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds? sunflower seeds

(47) If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be? the neighbourhood

(48) Are You A Picky Eater? kinda 

(49) Are You A Heavy Sleeper? eh 

(50) Do You Fear Thunder / Lightning? kinda 

(51) Do You Like To Read / Write? yes 

(52) Do You Like Your Music Loud? depends on mood

(53) Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents? wrap 

(54) Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up? sleepy hallow ft foushee- deep end freestyle 

(55) What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather) winter?? 

(56) What Are You Craving Right Now? l o k i (my original answer was warmth but its basically the same thing) 

(57) Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed. 

(58) What Is Your Gender? female

(59) Coffee Or Tea? tea

(60) Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About? nope, i finished it on Friday and Saturday like a bad bitchhhhhhhhh

(61) What Is Your Sexuality? bisexual

(62) Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning? depends on day 

(63) Favourite Pokemon? squirtle i guess

(64) Favourite Social Media? insta 

(65) What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories? they're fine 

(66) Do You Get Homesick? kinda 

(67) Are You A Virgin? ill leave it up to ur imagination bitch (MENNA IM SO SORRY IM NOT CALLING U A BTICH IM JUST SAYING THAT IN GENERAL) 

(68) What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now? i forgot the name, but its white and fancy and from the same brand 

(69) If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free? hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm that is a very good question, probably the motel 

(70) Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life? AHAH depends on what u mean by “still in my life”!!!!!!! i guess technically yes, but I've already cut off those bitches in my head 😌 manifesting it into existence <3 

(71)  Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters? avatar 2 

(72) Do You Miss Your Ex? i don't have one 

(73) What Is Your Favourite Quote Right Now? “not you, i didn't wanna hurt you”

(74)  What Eye Colour Do You Find Sexiest? brown bc if i say any other color, its probably a yt person and also brown be smexy

(75) Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set? yes, yes 

(76) What Was The Last Thing You Ate? honey buttered biscuits 

(77) What Games Do You Have On Your Phone? among us, maybe Minecraft 

(78) Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not? no bc i don't know how and i would call for someone else to help 

(79) Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight?probably bc I'm a hermit

(80) Stalked Someone On A Social Network? amsifnda this is ME ur talking to 

(81) Do You Like Meeting New People? yes kinda, unless they're awkward (aHEM BREAKOUT ROOMS WITH NEW BUT AWKWARD PEOPLE-) 

(82) Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them. i used to but not anymore 

(83) Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed?  i want it closed but the person i share the room with leaves it open bc they say we’re gonna fuckin suffocate if we leave it closed and i hate it bc ✨trauma✨! DONT WE LOVE TRAUMA??!?!?!?!??!?!?!? :D............

(84) What Are Three Things You Did Today? i baked biscuits, i did college stuff, i showered

(85) What Do You Wear To Bed? usually mismatched pjs 

(86) List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now. chapstick, natural skincare serum, lotion, face masks

(87) Are You A Day Or Night Person? day 

(88) List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc. don't have any

(89) Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened.

a snake chased me and it was weird as fuck

(90) Favourite Soda Drink? don't have one 

(91) What Sounds Are Your Favourite? people laughing, violin and piano, my friends voices, my siblings voices

(92) Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More? SWEATS

(93) How Do You Look Right Now? comfy 

(94) Name Something That Relaxes You. showering

(95) What Tattoo Do You Want? maybe an important quote? “dont trust owls” imprinted on my face

(96) Favourite YouTuber? stephanie soooooooooooooooooooooo 

[yyxgin]

i think what bugged me the most is i could say ‘they’re literal depression pills/they made me depressed’ and could reel off the side effect word for word (1/10 will experience mood swings (sometimes in the form of depression)) which was literally the first fricking side effect listed and the most common and she would still refer to it as me being sad literally seconds later in a convo. okay i never went to the doctor but when it occurred to me that, hey, something isn’t right, we were in the middle of a fucking pandemic!! i mean, we still are, but you get the point. this was right at the beginning when they basically closed everything as well so even if i wanted to i wouldn’t have been able to go see someone about it. but it’s whatever now, i don’t take them and i don’t have to give her any advice about them ✌️ i completely get the lack of validity about your emotions. that’s exactly how i felt.

i work so im not bothered about seeing people as i see them enough by my standards already but there is a helpful little voice in the back of my head reminding me that i still need to see my friends!! from before i got a job lol. i worked like 55 hours? my first proper week when i wasn’t on reduced hours and now i work maybe 30? which annoys me so i’m gonna ask for more bc i wanna buy a car and insurance. you still go to school, right? i feel like you’re more stressed about work considering you’re studying too. or were. have you just broken up from school? i don’t study, thank fuck, anymore, so i can do full time but i always get put on evenings so i’m thinking of getting a 9 to 5 bc then i can get the money i need.

a woman was rude to me bc her takeaway wasn’t ready bang on the clock when she turned up to pick it up. man it took literally every fibre in my being not to tell her to fucking leave me alone bc i’m a waitress?? what does she expect me to do??? i found out after but apparently our website tells you to allow a 15 minute slot when you order takeaway to pick up. i checked on this woman’s takeaway and told her it’d be ready in 10 minutes and she said sumn along the lines of ‘so 10 past 8?’. imma tell you straight i wasn’t looking at my phone so i assumed that meant the time was 8pm! (it wasn’t) she said to me ‘and i assume you’ll be knocking money off of the bill for that?’ and i politely replied ‘i can’t do that.’ bc i literally cannot. has to be a managerial figure. bearing in mind she’s already paid in full online???????? n she replies ‘do you wanna go suggest that?’ and nods towards the kitchen and i said no and walked off. the AUDACITY??? anyway i told my manager and she rolled her eyes and was like we don’t do partial refunds and said she’d talk to the woman when her order was ready. this woman was all up in my face saying ‘do you think that’s a reasonable time?’ asking if she should come back at 8:10 and im like idfk?? i have things to be doing can you fuck off?? no i didn’t say that but she says ‘i’ve got kids in the car with the engine running’ and i deadpanned ‘i didn’t tell you to leave your kids in the car with the engine running’ bc it was the first thing my brain thought of that wasn’t ‘sounds like a you problem to me’. in the end she left and came back but when she came back she was properly shouting at another waitress i work with and the girl was like 😄 your food was ready 20 minutes ago but you didn’t leave your details to be able to ring you to tell you it’s ready. she even re-mentioned the kids in the car saying they were starving and it was all our fault and the girl was like hmm okay. and then the woman said she was gonna leave a bad review on trip advisor!! and the waitress was like 😃 you do that bestie!! another great day on the grind :D (i forgot to say we were swamped on saturday so that’s why everything was so busy but she was literally the only one complaining that bad, like literally everyone could see we were struggling but they also were saying to wait staff things like ‘i know you can’t make things go quicker back there’ while we were apologising for the phat delay on their food).

another funny one (that made the barman laugh when i told it to him) was a grandma and a grandson in my section. the grandma was dictating his life jesus 😭 (not important but made me go 😳) but one of the girls cleared the table partially when i was doing sumn else so i finished it off and when we get back to kp she tells me the grandma complained the food was cold and without hesitation i said ‘well she fucking ate it all so tell her to fuck off and talk to someone who gives a shit’. she went quiet and i was like,, man i hope i didn’t scare her. but like. they cleared their plates. there was no food left. she didn’t call someone over. she didn’t say anything to anyone when they ask if it was okay. why wait until the end?? anyway i told thé barman and he giggled (he’s got a lovely laugh in my opinion bc it sounds like he’s snickering at everything). i was NOT going to tell my manager bc there’s literally no point. same day, later on, a man said his mussels were cold, i took them back and the kitchen cooked them again. i’d barely put the food down before he called me over (this one is a good one bc he hasn’t eaten EVERYTHING before complaining and therefore we can do something about the problem‼️) respect to that guy.

one of the girls gave me a lift home last night n the barman directed her right to my house without ever having been to my house before (his cousin used to live in the flats down the other end, he says) and when i messaged her later on thanking her and saying it was a bit sus that he directed her perfectly to mine n she said ‘hmm ben seems to go to yours more than he does his own home 🤔🤔🤔🤔’ bc apparently he was absolute shite at giving directions to his flat 😭 n e way he’s a sweetheart n he says he doesn’t like christmas anymore n he made me sad after he said that n i said i’d post coal through his letter box n he said i might as well n i was like okay this is an actual problem n now i’m gone be super nice to him at christmas bc he deserves so much more that the hand he’s been dealt. this convo happened after i let him try this herbal tea he said smelt nice n i said it tasted like christmas to me. he’s such a good person (despite literally everything he tells me about his past) n i cannot have him being a little humbug. god i think this crush i joked to you about is becoming a soft core friendship. like every fucking wattpad story out there. me n the girls agreed someone has to love him 🥺

okay im signing off now ily ~ 🌻

 i am glad you are feeling better though, nobody deserves to suffer. and nobody deserves to have their emotions invalidated. remember that your emotions matter at all times. <3

yesyes i am still in school !! altough my summer break started on july 1st so i am not that stressed about managing many things at once anymore hh,, also you are working so much ??? damn ?? please remember to take some breaks and relax !! and meet your friends !!! have fun. i know you are saving up money but please dont overwork yourself !

wHY ARE PEOPLE SO RUDE OH MY GOD I SWEAR,,, i learned that while working with people. i just,, it feels like they are all looking down on me just because i am young and work there part-time. like bro,,chill. also i feel kind of bad when they ask me where stuff is and i cant tell them bc i have no idea but at the same time if people were all introverts like me i wouldnt have this problem. :) dfjk jk jk i should improve on that. i wish people were more nice to you !!! who do they think they are ?? like,,,,,why are you rude. this is clearly not your problem.

i like it when people tell you respectfully. like the guy you mentioned. because clearly what are you going to do about the cold food when they’ve eaten it all. where’s the logic. 

IT SOUNDS LIKE HE IS OVER AT YOURS EVERY OTHER DAY DFJAKL that’s so funny. also i am bad at giving directions to my flat as well lmaoo poor ladies that drive me home from work sometimes. also i hate christmas as well lmaoo i feel that boy. its a little hard for me and i hope he doesn’t feel as bad during christmas this year when he has you around hihi,,, i fully stan this friendship. altough i am a big fan of friends to lovers if you know what i mean. in the energy of wattpad :))

ily !!!

[roslin]

i suck and theres a lot of these so im putting them all together

(tags at the end)

Instructions: tag 10 people you’d like to know better!

I was tagged by the lovely @veky1993 and @yousayperfect-isaystreep 💕

Name: vanessa

Starsign: virgo

Hogwarts House: ravenclaw

Height: 170 cm

Sexuality: bi (myself)

Favorite animal: whales

Average time of sleep: now that im in quarantine i get 8 hours of sleep every night. im a new person. turns out most of my personality was just sleep deprivation  

Current time: 9:30 pm

Dogs or Cats: both

Blankets you sleep with: a flower print one thats super ugly but whatever

When you made your blog: 2015. i checked

Followers: 4k

Why you made your blog: bc i had watched voyager and had a lot of things i needed to process

Reason for your url: saint laura of the roslin is my guide

rules: answer 21 questions and tag 21 people you would like to get to know better

tagged by @gkellmans 💕

real name? vanessa

nickname? nessa

zodiac? virgo sun, virgo moon, gemini rising

favorite musicians or groups? leonard cohen. david bowie, cat stevens/yusuf islam

favorite sports teams? no thanks

other blogs? nope

do i get asks? yes and if i didn’t answer them is bc sometimes tumblr doesnt show them to me! i get the notification bubble but thats it

how many blogs do i follow? 1794 bc im a hoe

tumblr crushes? not in a while

lucky numbers? idk, 7

what am i wearing? red pajamas that say “you what?” in the back

dream vacation? i dont really care, as long as its somewhere new

dream car? dont care

favorite food? beans... just... yeh, beans

drink of choice? coffee

instruments? don’t play anything

languages? portuguese, english, spanish, and a little bit of french (i can understand everything but i get nervous if i have to speak)

celebrity crushes? thing is, i get crushes on characters and then i follow the actresses/actors on social media and then i can’t read fanfic anymore bc it gets weird and the crush is gone 

random facts? i have a neighbor that listens to leonard cohen and david bowie every day and i think i might have hallucinated them 

This or That

tagged by @adayinthelifeofablonde53 💕

coffee or tea | early bird or night owl | chocolate or vanilla | spring or fall | silver or gold | pop or alternative | freckles or dimples | snakes or sharks | mountains or fields | thunder or lightning | egyptian mythology or greek mythology | ivory or scarlet | flute or lyre | opal or diamond | butterflies or honeybees | macarons or eclairs | typewritten or handwritten | secret garden or secret library | rooftop or balcony | spicy or mild | opera or ballet | london or paris | vincent van gogh or claude monet | denim or leather | potions or spells | ocean or desert | mermaids or sirens | masquerade ball or cocktail party

20 random FACTS about yourself that may surprise people.

tagged by @gkellmans thank you!

1. do you make your bed? never happened

2. what’s your favourite number? 7?

3. what’s your job? commercial manager (idk how to call it in english)

4. if you could, would you go back to school? im still in college, i keep coming up with excuses to learn more stuff

5. can you parallel park? girl i cant even drive

6. a job you had which would surprise people? i was a teacher at 18. even i was surprised

7. do you think aliens are real? yeah

8. can you drive a manual car? nope

9. what’s your guilty pleasure? im trying to think of something i feel guilty about but... not really. eating cereal at 5 am? weird netflix documentaries? too many hair masks? nah

10. tattoos? no

11. favourite colour? red

12. things people do that drive you crazy? people who take too long to say something very simple

13. any phobias? fucking clowns

14. favourite childhood sport? no thanks

15. do you talk to yourself? not out loud, unless im sing-saying it..... 

16. what movie do you adore? lotr, labyrinth, the princess and the goblin 

17. do you like doing puzzles? no

18. favourite kind of music? 80′s bops

19. tea or coffee? coffee

20. the first thing you remember you wanted to be when you grew up? psychologist 

i tag: @novellaqueen, @imaginaryhat, @kidmannicole, @theuinendili, @captain-coffeebean, @strangerstarsandlands, @galsinspace, @margotgrissom do all of them, do a couple, do none im not ur real dad 😘

[shadowofmoths]

fuck it, all the evens for the quarantine ask, there are no rules anymore

NO RULES NO RULES NO RULES!! putting this under a cut to spare yall lmao

2. Grilled cheese or PB&J?

GRILLCHEESE. i have recently developed an idealogical opposition to peanut butter but also have you ever been awake at like Too Late and ur jus vibing and u make a grilled cheese and have ur midnight grillcheese? fucking MAGICAL. avery and i all the time when it is Too Late will be like “i want something. what do i want what is it GRILLCHEESE” and then we grill a cheese.

4. Your go-to bar order, if you drink?

i dont drink ! but i do love to have fancy, nonalcoholic drinks....no go-to bar order tho rip 

6. Top three cuisines?

i like...italian food, ofc, as anyone who knows my last name would probably guess, but also my top fav is like mediterranean & middle eastern food ? like fuck man what i would not do in life for a good gyro 

8. What’s a job that you’ve had that people might be surprised to find out you’ve had?

i have not, uh, strictly had jobs, as such, but uh a fun fact abt me is that i did Literally Every Possible Volunteer Position at my church i think lkjhgfhfhs. 

10. Do you own any signed books/memorabilia in general?

answered!

12. What do you get on your bagels? What WOULD you get if you had access to anything you wanted?

OK SO. there is this place near my mom’s college that i think might just literally be called the bagel place and they have a kind of bagel named after their school mascot which is just. bagel, and then you toast it, adn put cream cheese on each half, and then you put some regular cheese on the top of it and put it in a broiler and melt the cheese and its SO GOOD and thats my ideal bagel. 

14. Favorite mug you own

THIS IS A GOOD QUESTION. sofia gave me a yellow mug and its little and v round and decorated w flowers and its SO GOOD and its my fav. i also have a black skull mug and a haunted mansion mug that i LOVe adn theyre all in MARYLAND STILL HELP. i miss them. 

16. Pick a song lyric to describe your current mood (and drop the name and artist!)

it took a concerted effort here not to choose something from next to normal which tells you how intensely GOING THRU IT i am. there’s a song called “better in the morning” by birdtalker that my spotify discover weekly hit me w during a late night breakdown that sort of encapsulates my “this fuckin SUCKS bro but we’re gonna keep goin tho” vibe.

18. What’s that one TV show that you’re a little bit embarrassed to watch but you still like nonetheless?

SHAME OVER INTERESTS IS BORING. ITS 2020. SOMETIMES I WATCH OLD EPISODES OF SHAKE IT UP WITH MY SISTERS. no but my real answer is....i really genuinely unironically love high school musical the musical the series. is it good? not, like, really! but i love it. its probably made me tear up. but im not embarrassed abt it lmao 20. Do you match your socks?

answered!22. What was your “phase” when you were younger? (i.e., Mythology Nerd, Horse Girl, Space Geek, etc)

JKHGSDAF my phase was “Undiagnosed ADHD” so it was , All The Phases really but no it was star wars for sure. but star wars wasnt a PHASE mom thats who i AMMMM 

24. What’s your opinion on Lazy Susan’s (the spinning tray in the middle of tables)?

i...no opinion? they’re..fine? 

26. You can only have one juice for the rest of your life, what is it?

ok theres a local like, dairy farm that makes a FUCKING MAGICAL watermelon lemonade in the summer and i would do anything to have that shit year round 28. What’s one thing you’re trying to learn/relearn in your downtime right now?

knitting! embroidery! uhhhh time management when ur trapped and have adhd! other assorted mental health strategies, like “how to explain to ur teachers that u need help bc ur brain is just Chaotic and also the WORLD IS ENDING, catriona, PLEASE no more essays.” 30. Where could someone find you in a museum?

depends on the museum! but ur best bet is “genuinely crying over van goghs” or otherwise having Very Big Emotions over someone like monet or agnes martin

32. Rainbows, stars, or sunset colored clouds?

ALL OF THESE. probably sunset clouds but also i cannot TELL you how much i miss stars when im out in MD being a Big City Boy.

34. Do you have more art on your walls or more photographs?

art! altho im thinking of disassembling the Art Wall™ and doing smth else bc its gotten a little chaotic in here lately 

36. Pick a superhero sidekick to hang out with

ok, like, define sidekick! which of the young avengers are “sidekicks” if its just a group of gay friends doing universe-saving together?? would you relegate billy kaplan to “sidekick” status? sidekick to WHOM? anyway the answer is teddy altman. 

38. Favorite mid-2000s song

answered!

40. Where do you sit in the living room (we all have a preferred spot, and you know it)?

the couch corner is MINE, babey!! (8 ppl in ur house does mean a big L shaped couch is relatively necessary.) altho recently ive developed a habit of whenever i see someone sitting in a spot i decide that is now My Spot. the person already there doesnt have to move! but i will also be sitting there now thank you. no, im not craving physical affection, why do you ask? 

42. A song you didn’t think you’d enjoy but ended up loving

i dont think i expected to Fall In Love with carly rae jepsen, i dont think ! but her power.....wow. 

44. Are you a “Quote that relates to the photos” caption-er, an “explanation of where I took the photos” caption-er, or a no caption kinda person when you post pictures online?

quote that relates to the photos, usually! with maybe a little explanation. most of the photos i post are arts so it’ll be like “this is carrion hes a bitch i love him” etc 

46. What’s the freezer food that you stock up on when you go to the grocery store?

i dont think...anything in the freezer in my apartment is mine? i think ive got some ben and jerry’s phish food in there tho which is DEFINITELY bad by now, FUCK, but also toaster waffles, conceptually, would be my answer. 

48. Do you like Jello?

yes ! it is . Fun To Eat. 

50. How are you at climbing trees?

pretty bad, bc coordination is a no and im afraid of heights, but i sure do love to try ! and then get too scared! 

[scullyeffect]

i love reading your posts about being a nanny, its something i like the idea of but i dont think id ever be able to do it

it definitely takes a certain type of person i think, but you can also learn with experience. i have friends who suddenly become very ~aware of themselves~ when talking with a kid. like making sarcastic jokes or something and it’s like um...be yourself?? nobody likes being talked to in a patronising tone, or spoken to like a well behaved dog. but seriously, just be yourself. they already think you’re cool af for not being mom lol. and most kids don’t judge. the amount of times i’ve been self conscious about my appearance at work? zero. the amount of times i’ve been scared my boss will catch me on my phone? zero. the amount of times i’ve plucked a wedgie with confidence? every day. i’d been babysitting kids for like 8 years (including one 5 y/o girl who got dropped off at my house at 8 every morning and was picked up at 6pm five days a week for the entire summer when i was 16...wow) before i became an au pair, but i know people who wing it and are completely fine.

i think the real key to it being a job you can enjoy or be “good” at is patience. because at the end of the day you’re not the parent. it’s not fully up to you to discipline the kids. you get to go home at the end of the day. sometimes you have to bring problems up with the parents to deal with because you’re unsure about their protocol (the kids i take care of aren’t allowed to watch tv or use electronics, so when i showed them a trailer for a movie 6 was like ooooh i’m gonna tell mom!! and i was like fuck). one time 6 peed during a 5 floor elevator ride and i had to reassure her that it was okay, then spend ten minutes wiping up the mess with paper towels hoping to hell no one would need the elevator. luckily that sent her right into the shower so there was no war. like i could have lost my temper and been like WHY DIDN”T YOU JUST HOLD IT. YOU CLEAN IT UP. because she had been holding it for like 30 minutes and she’s 6. i learned from this and whenever one of them says they need to go i’m like WHO WANTS A PASTRY REAL QUICK LET’S GO SPEND 5 EUROS TO PEE.

but at the same time you end up being a really important factor in a child’s life. sometimes they’ll ask you questions they feel like they can’t ask their parents: the 15 y/o teenager i lived with for two years came into my room in tears saying she couldn’t figure out how to use a tampon and she didn’t want to ask her mom, the 9 year old got “the talk” from her mom but admitted to me that she didn’t understand and could she ask me some questions. you’re the one (in my case), who’s making sure they’re clean and have eaten and brushed their teeth before the parents come home. you’re the one helping with homework (and it’s really amazing to be able to be the one teaching a kid how to read at home. i’ve gotten to do this twice and it’s so exciting when they start wanting to read some of their bedtime story instead of letting you do it). at the end of the day it’s a really humbling job.

but patience and understanding is really key, also confidence. sometimes babysitters are the good guy, and you can get away with anything because mom and dad are out for the night. i think that’s normal and fun. but when you’re with the kids every day you don’t get to just be the good guy, or they won’t learn anything. and that’s hard!! because again, you don’t have the full parental authority. 

the absolute ABSOLUTE most important thing, which can either be the easiest or most difficult, is getting a solid routine going. especially with younger kids, but it’s good for all ages. once you have the routine set up you’re good for life. obviously sometimes you’ve gotta roll with a doctor’s appointment, or in my case the occasional public transport strike (”who wants to walk a mile today ladies!!!”) it’s especially nice when the kids unconsciously pick up on it and will sometimes prompt you like “how much time do we have to play until bath time?”, or “today is wednesday, so we’re going to the park, but can we go to this one instead of that one?”. so like with the kids i take of now the afternoon routine (except wednesday, which is different) is:

4:30pm: pick up from school, snack while we’re taking the metro back (bc otherwise they get antsy, they haven’t eaten since 11:30)

5:00-5:30pm: homework

5:30-6:30pm: play/read

6:30-7:00pm: one of them takes a bath/shower while i make dinner, the other one sets the table and helps with dinner, or she can read/play

7:00-whenever dinner is finished (normally 7:45pm)

7:45-8ish: second one takes a bath/shower while the other helps clear the table, then she can read/play, after that they both brush their teeth

8:00-9:00 the older one reads while i read to the younger one, or they’ll both listen to me read

also keep in mind this is france where eating late is normal, bedtime is probably later than the US (when i think about putting kids to bed at 7:30 in the US i feel like it’s the afternoon)

idk if you remember, but in september when i started taking care of 6 and 9 i was absolutely miserable. their parents had separated literally weeks before i arrived so the emotional dynamic was chaotic as hell, both apartments were in boxes, they were sleeping over at their grandparents’ house most nights, and here was this new girl they were supposed to trust. i met the girls for about 10 minutes in june when i had an interview, but the next time i saw them was the first day i picked them up from school. they still stress me out way more than the girls i lived with for two years (who were older, but overall just more well behaved), but i love them a lot. for the first two months i seriously thought i’d quit. i was so stressed out every day and felt like i was getting no support from the parents when i brought up problems i was having with their kids. now i really love them and i think they dig me too. 

so i think if you want to do it maybe try to get more experience babysitting and trying to get a steady babysitting job! i remember i would babysit the same toddler pretty often and i always had a loose routine with her so that when i came over she knew what to expect and i didn’t feel so harried at age 17. if you’re looking to be an au pair though, especially in a foreign country, you’ve gotta be picky as hell. i learned that from experience. if you don’t think you can handle a baby but you want to live in paris, you’ve gotta put your job before the location. if you do better taking care of boys (i do way better with girls. they’re so awful to each other if they have a sister, but the chaotic physical energy boys seem to have does not agree with me. they’re like dogs i’m like “time to play frisbee i need to wear you out”) look for a family with boys unless you think you can adapt. if you’re fine with both, go for it. if you want to learn/improve a foreign language, try to find a family that’s cool with you speaking their native language. people looking for anglophone nannies often have a 100% english policy. when i plugged in all my search criteria in 2016 i think i found five families total who fit the specifications. and then in addition to that i skyped all of them so i could try and sense if a Vibe was there. 

i’m sorry this is so long but i don’t have any au pair friends who kind of like...were there for the job as well as the city...so i never got to gab childcare. ask me all the questions.

[kyn19]

1 THROUGH 98! I WANT TO KNOW THE ANSWERS AND I CAN'T STAND GETTING THEM PIDDLING BIT BY PIDDLY BIT!!!!!

Lmaooooo what a fuckin Mood. Thank you!!!!! Also, you’re getting Drunk Kylie answers which are arguably the Best answers. For the courtesy of everyone’s dash, answers are below the cut!! <3 <3 <3

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?

Coffee mugs! I have a sizable collection lmao #WriterLife

2. chocolate bars or lollipops?

omg such a tough one, both are aces. seriously I can think of so many combatting pros & cons!! the only fair way i can currently conceive is which i would want weed in. Which is lollipops bc (#UnpopularOpinion) pot makes chocolate taste bad.

3. bubblegum or cotton candy?

both are great, but def bubblegum.

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you?

“Pleasure to have in class” in true Gifted Child fashion

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups?

i’ll rate them in order: 1) can (absolutely preferred), 2) bottle if alone but plastic (lez be honest, Red Solo Cup) if with company, 3) glass (do not like)

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear?

#1 goth all the way. Pastel and Formal guest appearances

7. earbuds or headphones?

headphone, bc earbuds usually hurt my ears.

8. movies or tv shows?

first of all, how dare you. second of all, tv shows ONLY BECAUSE if all my fave movies were given tv shows so that they could last longer i would choose so

9. favorite smell in the summer?

idk i guess pool chlorine? dislike summer

10. game you were best at in p.e.?

bruh fuckin none. elementary school: too long ago to recall. middle school: escaped having to take gym at all. high school: had a medical excuse to take online PE. least athletic girl u know

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day?

i don’t have bfast bc eating close to when i awaken makes my tummy upset

12. name of your favorite playlist?

hmm 4-way tie between “#motivate #bitch” (gets me pumped to work) and “Friends Of The Illness” (my playlist of songs about and/or artist who are mentally ill) and “Ominous/haunting” (speaks to my creepy side) and “Bad Bitches” (self-explanatory amirite)

13. lanyard or key ring?

Key ring. Straight up I use an extra shoelace as my key ring string, despite owning multiple lanyards.

14. favorite non-chocolate candy?

god another fkn hard one. Listen y’all, you dont understand how much of a sugar fiend i am. candy is my JAM. Starbursts, Sour Straws, Skittles, Jolly Ranchers...who can choose?!

15. favorite book you read as a school assignment?

“Ceremony” by Leslie Marmon Silko. Highly recommend!!!!!!!!!!!

16. most comfortable position to sit in?

laying down lol sitting is for suckers

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes?

combat boots like the gay i am

18. ideal weather?

low 70′s degrees (F*), intermittent showers during the day but clear starry skies overnight

19. sleeping position?

mostly fetal, mostly on my side but chest is towards the bed, one arm under the pillow under my head

20. preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)?

Laptop. I used to love writing in notebooks, but ya girl got weak fingy joints nowadays

21. obsession from childhood?

pfft as if they aren’t the same obsessions i have now

22. role model?

so many!!!!! Jameela Jamil is the first that comes to mind

23. strange habits?

lmao i am ass-deep in idiosyncrasies, if you ain’t read the blog title already

24. favorite crystal?

i don’t know anything about crystals. does blue topaz count? cuz that’s my birthstone and i like that one a lot. i even had the foresight to pick that as my engagement ring’s stone in my utterly preposterous & failed relationship

25. first song you remember hearing?

oh wow, no idea. music has always been huge for me. probably either a Britney Spears or Mary J. Blige song???

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather?

stay inside lmao

27. favorite activity to do in cold weather?

WEAR SWEATERS & DRINK HOT CHOCOLATE, BITCH!!!!!!!!!

28. five songs to describe you?

oof ok, hard, but here goes:

“Here” by Alessia Cara

“Wannabe” by the Spice Girls

“I’m Just a Kid and Life Is A Nightmare” by Simple Plan

“No Daddy” by Teairra Mari

“Brick By Boring Brick” by Paramore

29. best way to bond with you?

i am straight up not easy to make friends with (bc my own bullshit, not trying to be pretentious), so bonding is hard. the best way is probably a combo of queer + memes + loves food + correct morals + being the dominant talker

30. places that you find sacred?

Libraries, locally owned coffee shops, Walmarts at 3am, playgrounds in the middle of the night, side of a rural road at 12am, my bed

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names?

Blazer + shirt with a titty window + high waisted plaid pants + platform booties

32. top five favorite vines?

OMG I LOVE VINES OK OK OK OMG I LOVE SO MANY SO HERE ARE JUST THE ONES I QUOTE THE MOST OK:

Josh Kennedy: “What’s up my name’s Jared I’m 19 and I never fucking learned how to read”

Sarah Schauer: [dont remember the beginning] “didn’t you..?” “sleep in this? yes. mama needs A DRINK”

Evan Breer: “What’s up my & my boys are going to see Uncle Kracker - give me my hat back Jordan, do you see Uncle Kracker or no - *gasp!*”

Drew Gooden: “Road work ahead? Um yeah, I sure hope it does...”

Nathan Enick: “Yo how much money do you have?” “69 cents” “Oh you know what that means!” “...i don’t have enough money for chicken nuggets :( ...”

33. most used phrase in your phone?

bruh like how even am i supposed to answer this?? like texts or Siri requests or????? bc if it’s Siri requests then it’s 100% for arithmetic

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head?

Stanley Steamer. you kno the one

35. average time you fall asleep?

3:30am

36. what is the first meme you remember ever seeing?

bitch i’m a 90′s child of the internet, i was around the web before YouTube launched, i was there when the first modern memes were fucking conceived. i will say the biggest repository of meme culture that i was a part of was YouTube and icanhazcheezburger.com & its side-sites.

37. suitcase or duffel bag?

duffel - Tie-Dye Girl from the Lindsey Lohan “Parent Trap” made quite the impression on me

38. lemonade or tea?

Lemonade! hate the leaf water

39. lemon cake or lemon meringue pie?

Lemon cake! Not a meringue pie girl saly

40. weirdest thing to ever happen at your school?

I’ve been to a lot of schools yo lol. My undergrad college was def the “weirdest” ofc, bc it was an art school lol. An instance that stands out was a string of “Solid Gold Clit” graffiti after a Sophia Wallace visit to campus right before i started there.

41. last person you texted?

My bff triad pals @backwardswriter and @bristarshine

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets?

damn tough call. Probably jacket pockets bc i’m more likely to have those as a lady who wears lady-targeted pants

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?

Hoodie

44. favorite scent for soap?

Plum!

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero?

Fantasy, though sci-fi is a solid 2nd. Not much of a superhero gal

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in?

.....underwear only. Sometimes an oversized t-shirt too.

47. favorite type of cheese?

Mozzarella!!!

48. if you were a fruit, what kind would you be?

I would want to be like a pomegranate, but i’m probably a nectarine

49. what saying or quote do you live by?

“If you hope for the best but expect the worst, you’ll never be disappointed.”

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have?

bitch i’m a giggle monster, i taught myself to be easily amused as a survival mechanism.

51. current stresses?

My own lack of discipline.

52. favorite font?

oooooof i have so many ok. too name a few: Centaur, Garamont, Book Antigua, Times New Roman, Montserrat.....mostly Serif fonts bc I’m an old books bitch

53. what is the current state of your hands?

I don’t love my hands (how homophobic of me, I know). Currently they’re kinda dry and full of sandwich

54. what did you learn from your first job?

what kind of boss I like. also that my customer service voice is frighteningly pleasant

55. favorite fairy tale?

Original tale: Thumbelina. Adaptations: Snow White.

56. favorite tradition?

uhhh Thanksgiving feast I guess? i am not a traditions gal

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome?

I am very very fortunate to not have a lot or a severity of these. The ones that I’ve had the worst of are: gender discrimination/harassment as a woman, hardcore emotional abuse in a relationship, and heavy heavy mental illness

58. four talents you’re proud of having?

Tangible talents: writing, lying. Intangible: A+ imagination, useless trivia.

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be?

“I support you!”

60. if you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be?

like if Tokyo Mew Mew and Higurashi No Naku Koro Ni had a baby

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.?

Again, how dare you. Like literally, asking me to pick a favorite line from something is like asking what my favorite breed of dog is. Legit impossible

62. seven characters you relate to?

Ananka Fishbein (Kiki Strike series), Mermista (She Ra & the Princesses of Power), Luna Lovegood (Harry Potter), Gwen (Total Drama), Rori Gilmore (Gilmore Girls), Villanelle (Killing Eve), Andrea (St. Trinian’s)

so like all very- to semi-weird white girls lmao

63. five songs that would play in your club?

[by the term “club” i assume that i’m limited to pop and electronic music. even with the limitation, though, a super hard question]

“Talking Body” by Tove Lo

“Hot in Herre” by Nelly

“Because the Night” by Cascada

“Nails, Hair, Hips, Heels” by Todrick Hall

“Break Free” by Ariana Grande ft. Zedd

64. favorite website from your childhood?

pretty much any doll franchise’s site (Barbie, Bratz, My Scene, Polly Pocket, Diva Girlz, everGirl, etc you name it)

65. any permanent scars?

Yep. One by a dog scratch (it was honestly a weak/shallow/innocent scratch, i still have no idea why it scarred at all), and a few from a car crash last year

66. favorite flower(s)?

i don’t really like flowers? i usually just say Forget-Me-Not’s for ease

67. good luck charms?

bitch idk but i’m knocking on wood just from thinking bout it

68. worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried?

you ever taste that chocolate Laffy Taffy? vile bruh

69. a fun fact that you don’t know how you learned?

I am annoying enough to know how i learnt all my facts, but the funnest fact I like to annoy people with is that ducks have corkscrew penises evolved from their main form of mating being rape

70. left or right handed?

Right (like any ol’ simp)

71. least favorite pattern?

polka dots

72. worst subject?

MATH and also PHYS ED

73. favorite weird flavor combo?

One time whilst high, I put nacho cheese Doritos on a tuna sandwich. Winning combo, I’m telling you

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen?

My pain tolerance is straight up unpredictable, so like anywhere from a 3 to a 9

75. when did you lose your first tooth?

5 years old

76. what’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)?

Mashed potatoes

77. best plant to grow on a windowsill?

I am not a plant person. Moss.

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store?

fucking neither but i at least like coffee so i guess the former....

(i know, it’s tragic and barbaric that i dislike sushi, i wish i had another answer for you)

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo?

Neither lmao - I got them within a month of each other (six years ago) so they’re essentially the same photo.

80. earth tones or jewel tones?

Jewel!

81. fireflies or lightning bugs?

I mean those are the same bug so I assume this is asking about which terminology I typically use/prefer. Which i would say both bc I’m a cultured ho

82. pc or console?

I don’t game so I guess PC lmao

83. writing or drawing?

Writing but I like both

84. podcasts or talk radio?

damn neither lmao I can’t focus on non-music audio only. I guess talk radio, just bc I can do like ten minute radio segments at least lol

84. barbie or polly pocket?

both were lit but I had more Barbies

85. fairy tales or mythology?

not to sound like a broken record but FIRST OF ALL HOW DARE YOU? second of all, I essentially consider them in the same category at this point in modernity, so my answer is Yes.

86. cookies or cupcakes?

Cupcakes, but both are exquisite

87. your greatest fear?

spiders, heights, clowns, seeing bad things happening to animals, that my consciousness will exist even after death, y’know normal stuff

88. your greatest wish?

to transfer myself into one of my fave fictional worlds

89. who would you put before everyone else?

dogs, next question

90. luckiest mistake?

i make a lot of those honestly, so who knows

91. boxes or bags?

LISTEN I LOVE CONTAINERS OF ALL SORTS, YOU CAN’T MAKE ME CHOOSE, IM PANSEXUAL FOR A REASON

92. lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights?

FLASHLIGHTS, BITCH

93. nicknames?

Ky, KyKy, Moonshine, SugarTits, Goog Bones

94. favorite season?

Autumn (yes i call it that instead of Fall bc i’m a pretentious ass bitch lol)

95. favorite app on your phone?

Tumblr, c’mon

96. desktop background?

Currently a digital art painting of a flowing stag in a swamp that I downloaded from DeviantArt. I change it every few months though (to other downloaded digital art from DA that I collect periodically lmao)

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized?

Seven - mine, my mom’s 2 numbers, my grandma’s, my pop’s cell and office (also my old office) numbers, and my childhood house phone number lol

98. favorite historical era?

Golden Age of Piracy, specifically bc the piracy lol

Thank you so much for the asks, this was so much fun!!!

[caws5749]

This took SO LONG thanks @natthisback

1: Name Madison

2: Age 21

3: 3 fears spiders, not becoming a doctor, becoming like my parents

4: 3 things i love marvel movies, my blanket (whoops), and scrunchies

5: 4 turn ons compliment me, be chivalrous, (idk if this means sex turn on too or not but) moaning my n- ANYWHO uh and the last one definitely like showing you want me

6: 4 turn offs someone who only talks about themselves, being like wishy washy, being arrogant/cocky, complaining about the same things

7: my best friend that would be shea @cloversofshea

8: sexual orientation lesbian

9: my best first date okay SO this like isn’t a first date but it was my first like nicer dinner date so I’m gonna count it. It was just this past weekend actually and i just i loved it so much it was amazing

10: how tall am i 5’2

11: what do i miss honestly, feeling like i was good at things

12: what time were i born 11:14am

13: favorite color purple, although it’s slowly been turning to like a baby light pink

14: do i have a crush yes yes i do and i likes her a lot

15: favorite quote “Truth is a matter of circumstance. It’s not all things to all people all the time. And neither am I.”

16: favorite place Chicago or New York City

17: favorite food SALMON

18: do i use sarcasm yes, but i feel like i don’t use it as much as i used to

19: what am i listening to right now Christmas pop playlist on Spotify

20: first thing i notice in new person whether they only talk about themselves

21: shoe size 8 or 8.5

22: eye color blue

23: hair color right now, it’s a brown that goes to blond at my ends

24: favorite style of clothing so if this means like fav style to wear daily, definitely athleisure. If it means in general, i love love love preppy looks? But not super preppy.

25: ever done a prank call? Absolutely, many times

27: meaning behind my url i explain this in my about me page (linked in bio!)

28: favorite movie captain America winter soldier

29: favorite song i don’t really have favorite songs but rn it’s prob December night by Michael buble

30: favorite band i don’t really have fav bands

31: how i feel right now it’s really hot in here, so warm. I feel okay

32: someone i love i love lots of people but ill stick with @cloversofshea

33: my current relationship status I’ve answered this so many times literally just look at the ask game tag

34: my relationship with my parents um yikes

35: favorite holiday Halloween

36: tattoos and piercing i have i have 6 tattoos! “Breathe” on my right inner ankle, a heart on left shoulder, heart w equal sign in it behind right ear, basically an ecg on my left inner ankle, Aquarius symbol on right bicep, and caws 5749 on my left side. And my ears are pierced.

37: tattoos and piercing i want definitely the black widow symbol in the same place Scarlett got her og6 tattoo, an amino acid tattoo that spells out “wah” , definitely more little tattoos! And maybe more ear piercings idk

38: the reason i joined tumblr so, I’ve had a tumblr for many many years. I originally joined bc my best friends at the time had them, and i was like sure! Ive deleted that personal blog since, and started my new personal blog a few years ago. I also have a studyblr that i started i think back in high school, and i just started this blog back in the end of July!

39: do i and my last ex hate each other no, I’d say far from it bc i likes her a lot

40: do i ever get “good morning” or “good night” texts yes from her and i fucking love it, it used to be a bigger thing almost every day and i loved it

41: have i ever kissed the last person i texted lmao no and for those who were wondering it is @cloversofshea

42: when did i last hold hands LMAO WITH @michelinaamour WHEN I WAS STUMBLING HOME DRUNK IN HIGH HEELS

43: how long does it take me to get ready in the morning it depends, anywhere from ten minutes to an hour and a half

44: have you shaved your legs in the past three days no! I am super lucky and have really light colored hairs on my legs and so i dont’ have to shave very often. Also i just want to say that i personally love shaving my legs and it is my choice to do so.. girls, you do not need to shave!!

45: where am i right now so i started answering this in the research lab, but i am currently sitting at one of the dining places on campus finishing it

46: if i were drunk and can’t stand, who’s taking care of me LMAO DEFINITELY @michelinaamour because she’s done it ALREADY FOR ME MULTIPLE TIMES

47: do i like my music loud or at a reasonable level it depends, in car trips, definitely blast it. But just driving around or listening in doors, definitely reasonable level

48: do i live with my mom and dad nope i live with @michelinaamour

49: am i excited for anything yes, I’m excited for lots of things. I get excited easily

50: do i have someone of the opposite sex i can tell everything to no. I used to

51: how often do i wear a fake smile this is a really interesting question. I don’t consider smiles i give to random people like ordering food or something to be fake, so i would say fake smiles are when I’m not okay and trying to hide it. Which happens less often now bc I’m just much happier of a person

52: when was the last time i hugged someone I think it was @michelinaamour two days ago but i think i hugged @cloversofshea that day too so

53: what if the last person i kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me I’d be heartbroken tbh

54: is there anyone i trust even though i should not yes, certain adults in my life

55: what is something i disliked about today my hair won’t do what i want it to :(

56: if i could meet anyone on this earth who would it be probably Chris Evans or Scarlett Johansson

57: what do i think about the most tumblr and everything with that, or probably her or school stuff definitely

58: what’s my strangest talent i don’t think i have any lol

59: do i have any strange phobias yes definitely haha, I’m terrified of stepping on worms

60: do i prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it i think a few years ago i would have said behind, but honestly I think I’d love to be in front of the camera now

61: what was the last lie i told i actually don’t know. Maybe this past weekend as to like the fact that i was going out on a date instead of just going out with a friend

62: do i prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online I’d say talking on the phone bc then they cant’ see me lmao

63: do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? Yes and yes

64: do i believe in magic? Yes, or at least, that’s what i tell myself

65: do i believe in luck yes

66: what’s the weather like right now snowy!

67: what was the last book I’ve ever read The Butchering Art, it’s about the history of surgery

68: do i like the smell of gasoline omg yes yes yes yes yes yes

69: do i have any nicknames yes, madz, madi, girl who lives by the kitchen, queen (a new one) and clown (also a new one) thanks @natthisback

70: what was the worst injury I’ve ever had back in freshman year of college, i did something stupid and my foot swelled up like hell and hurt so bad. There were no fractures detected but the swelling stayed for a really long time, as well as the bruising and pain, and it never returned to normal

71: do i spent my money or save it SPEND IT BABY

72: can i touch my nose w my tongue no I’m not that talented

73: is there anything pink in 10 ft from me. Hmm part of my backpack? And my rings are pinkish bc they are rose gold. Oh and my scrunchie is pink, as well as my iPad

74: favorite animal cat

75: what was i doing last night at 12am i was still at work In the emergency room!

76: what do i think satan’s last name is uh honestly Jim lmao (it’s demons Jim! @cloversofshea )

77: what’s a song that always makes me happy when i hear it so good by dove Cameron

78: how can you win my heart suggest we watch a marvel movie, and I’m prob straight up in love. There are other things too but they’re pretty general, like compliment me, show you want me ya know

79: what would i want to be written on my tombstone haha, as a joke, “so realy its very thing. Just to keep everyone guessing.” But idk something funny

80: what is my favorite word i have no idea, maybe like sophisticated or something like that or aesthetic , champagne is a good one too

81: my top 5 blogs on tumblr ooh! Okay so @markiplier @lesbian-deadpool @americasass-romanoff @lesbianmariahilll @shining-rey-of-sunshine but i love so so so so so many more, and i have a lot of top blogs

82: if the whole world were listening to me right now what would i say fuck trump also I’m gay as hell and I’m growing tired of hiding it from people

83: do i have any relatives in jail not that i know of

84: i accidentally eat some radioactive vegatables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super power of my choice! What is that power lmao this question is great. Prob same powers as Wanda

85: what would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on any weird fetis- JUST KIDDING. Do you still think about them?

86: what is my current desktop picture so on my laptop, it’s fall flowers. But since that’s broken af, i use my iPad and that background is one of the apple ones. It’s just a beach idk why but I’ve never changed it

87: had sex WHY IS THIS IN EVERY SINGLE ASK GAME WTF

88: bought condoms nope i am gay as hell bye

89: gotten pregnant nope i am gay as hell bye

90: failed a class nope, definitely come close though

91: kissed a boy yes

92: kissed a girl yes

93: have i ever kissed somebody in th rain honestly, probably at some point, but I’ve never had one of those romantic kisses in the rain. I really really want to though and i think about it a lot

94: had job yeah, I’ve had three true jobs

95: left the house without my wallet probably

96: bullied someone on the internet no bc I’m not a fucking douche

97: had sex in public not yet

98: played on a sports team yeah, played softball and basketball in middle school

99: smoked weed yeah, but i didn’t get high

100: did drugs nope

101: smoked cigarettes nope, i think i asked drunk once if i could smoke, but my friend was like “really?” And i was like uhhhhhh just kidding haha

102: drank alcohol lmao i drink fucking all the time i mean. I literally have drunk writing nights , I’m drinking tonight too

103: am i a vegetarian/vegan i was a vegetarian for a while, and then an aspiring vegan, and then vegetarian, and then pescatarian now!

104: been overweight no

105: been underweight yes

106: been to a wedding yeah, but like not for a long time. I was like 4 and the flower girl. Oh WAIT. Does playing a wedding count? I played cello at a wedding so i was there???

107: been on the computer for 5 hours straight hell yeah, how would i function not doing this with class and relaxing

108: watched tv for 5 hours straight lmao definitely

109: been outside my home country yeah

110: gotten my heart broken yeah

111: been to a professional sports game yeah. I don’t really do sports though , so when i go it’s usually in suites and I’m just there for the food

112: broken a bone nope!

113: cut myself this is...a. Really deep question but bc i want to be able to speak about mental health on here, the answer is yes.

114: been to prom yes! I went to my junior and senior proms!

115: been in airplane too many times

116: fly by helicopter no, I’m not sure if i want to do this or not

117: what concerts have i been to I’ve been to lots. So first off, I’ve been to hundreds of classical concerts (and performed in them). As for pop, Bruno mars twice, maroon five like three times. Selena Gomez. Josh groban. American authors. Definitely others that i don’t remember

118: had a crush on someone of the same sex yes I’m fucking gay

119: learned another language so if this means fluent, no. I took a decent amount of French and am learning Russian right now!

120: wore make up absolutely. When i choose to wear makeup, its because i fuckign love makeup haha. Most days I’m lazy though and like to let my skin breathe and be natural

121: lost my virginity before I was 18 no

122: had oral sex yeah

123: dyed my hair many times

124: voted in a presidential election okay i think so but honestly can’t remember. But I’m pretty sure i did.

125: rode in an ambulance no and i never want to.

126: had a surgery no and i never want to haha. Well i cant say that. Depending on how my life plays out, I might freeze my eggs or something.

127: met someone famous yes, several I think, but probably Henry winkler was the one I remember most.

128: stalked someone on a social network yeah

129: peed outside nope don’t think so and definitely don’t want to

130: been fishing yes I have been ice fishing and regular fishing

131: helped w charity i have!

132: been rejected by a crush I’ve been not liked back but i don’t think I’ve ever made like a move on a crush and been rejected

133: broken a mirror ooh i don’t think i have actually

134: what do i want for birthday nothing bc i dont’ like my bday

[pokemagines]

JAPAN TRIP 2k19 with Mod Elesa (1/?)

hey n’yall it’s mod elesa, lemme tell u bout my japan trip! u can find some of the photos of these events on my instagram @atel2er! i didn’t want to flood this post with pictures hehe ,,

GENERAL STUFF

went for school, study abroad trip to study visualization and simulation of “serious games” that businesses buy and use (but i dont feel like talking abt it since this is the FUN POST

may 10-26

the flight was 11 hours, p easy, i didn’t know anybody going into the trip because i didn’t go to any of the meetings HAHhaHEHA

whatever. everyone on the trip initially came off as if they had yellow fever and i was like ... i’m really not trying to interact with FETISHIZERS

turns out they were all really cool! only this one kid was a real weeaboo who was greasy and tall and a neckbeard who kept talking about being “culturally insensitive” and speaking japanese constantly to the teacher and the TA like ... ok patrick we get it you flex

i stayed in a hotel in shinjuku! everything is so small and i used the bidets for the first time and WOO chile that shit feels FUNKY on your asshole

i visited shinjuku major (kabukicho aka red light district, couple other places!), ikebukuro (THE MEGA POKEMON CENTER), mt fuji, fuji q highland, akihabara, hamamatsucho (area where tokyo tower is), HARAJUKU, and the emperor’s palace! i’m probably forgetting some places since we went to a lot of temples and shrines that were cool ...

the public transportation in japan is scarily on time.. like, by the second. they apologize if they’re one minute early and will wait until the scheduled time before they move omg

the subway stations have their own jingles! they kind of act as an alarm system because a lot of people sleep on the subway (which is why people generally don’t talk on it) and will recognize the jingle for their stop!

the crowded hours on the subway are noon and 6-8pm... like, its insane. it’s actually packed like sardines in there. 

EVERYONE THERE IS SO SHORT.... i was taller than a lot of the grown men there (i’m 5′4″ or 162 cm for reference) and most people were around 5 feet tall... the only people taller than me were some kids around my age and this gaggle of japanese schoolgirls who were like 5′7+ and i was like. sis you’re 13, why are you that tall

pokemon is EXTREMELY prevalent in japan wherever you go. there’s pikachu stickers on taxis, pikachu is on ads on the subway and at the AIRPORT, pokemon go is widely played by a lot of people and so many of the people in my group played it so i got conned into playing again. i leveled up 5 times within 3 days and honestly? i’m god

anime is very normal there... i know that sounds all “weeby” but a lot of normal shops had animated mascots and there were ads for anime all over the place. 

literally gacha machines everywhere i spent a lot of coins on gacha machines plz kill me

the homies in japan loooove crepes. they sold so many crepes. everywhere. just crepes. also spaghetti carbonara! and corndogs HAHAHA

the food there is so cheap but SOOO GOOD. sushi isn’t all that expensive at all?? like a set of 16 pieces is 1080Y... meanwhile that cost in america is like. $6000 HAHAHAHAH. 

very humid? at all times? also the RAIN is debilitating if u make one wrong step you will slip and die (like i did! i stepped on a tile and fucking fell into a puddle! i have bruises still!)

SHINJUKU (detective pikachu day, may 10)

i went to go see detective pikachu on its release day in shinjuku! before that, i went to a couple sega buildings--

the sega buildings are 4 story buildings FILLED with claw machines holding stuffed animals, figurines, candy, all kinds of stuff. when i went, there was a lot of detective pikachu-related stuff. i saw this detective pikachu hat in one of the machines and spent 1000Y (about $10) or 10 attempts at the claw machine ... i still can’t believe i got it ... nobody was there to see it besides me and i YELLED when it dropped 

i wore the hat that entire day around shinjuku because i honestly felt like god. people would point at me and go like “ah! meitantei pikachu!” and smile at me. i was a celebrity. i wore the hat into the movie theatre, i wore it through the entire movie, and when i was walking out, someone tapped on my shoulder and asked for my picture. she was all nervous about her english and was like “i love your hat. may i take a picture?” and i was like omG YES U CAN... sweet bab... so that’s the first photo of me that ended up on some random person’s phone

we waited around for the mass of people to exit the theatre and then left, and we ran into her again! she asked me more questions about the hat: “did you make it?” “no, i got it in a claw machine in the sega building.” she looked dumbfounded. “in shinjuku?” “yes.” “in the sega building? over there?” “yeees.” “in a claw machine?!” “yes!” “ah! i thought you made it! it’s so cute! i’m going to get one for myself.” “lol ok have fun”

i learned that its customary to stay until the very end of the credits before leaving a movie out of respect for the people who made it! meanwhile in america we walk out when the credits roll FHDSKFJS OOPIES

SHINJUKU (visit #2)

we went in the night time to go see the red light district aka kabuki-cho because thats where a lot of the bars are

i don’t drink so i didn’t join the people who went to the bars to get CRUNK, so i dragged two other guys with me and we walked around the red light district

I SAW SO MANY HOST CLUBS. so many maid cafes. so many bars. i saw a love hotel too... i was like... i wanna go inside... Blease... and my friends were like “you’re so weird KHEDJFSk” and im like “I WAS GOOGLING THESE IN CLASS TODAY, I DIDN’T THINK THEY WERE REAL”

my friend sean (he’s from taipei, cool guy, could read a lot of the kanji so we used him to navigate the subway HAHA) was walking with me that night and we saw this hole in the wall that had stairs going down to a peep show ... homegirl had her whole ass out on the sign... tiddies covered with caution tape ... i said MAAM?

one of the signs in kabuki-cho had a woman doing straight up ahegao with (what i’m pretty sure was) nut on her face. it was a small sign and i was the only one who saw it. i lost my shit. it was the funniest thing ever

kabuki-cho is really really dirty... like people straight up litter all the time bc there’s no trashcans around? so people throw their shit on the ground? and everyone steps on it... very seedy area, very gross, but i was absolutely enthralled with the nightlife and the blatant sexual vibes half the places had!

some dude stopped me and started speaking english saying “do you like karaoke? you should come drink with me for two hours, it’s a great price if you drink a lot” and i was like “no... i have to go home” and he’s like “come onnnn it’s a good price” and i was like. i’m not very assertive with men so i started panicking and my friend sean (A GOD AMONG MEN) started speaking chinese to him and he backed off ... i love you sean you’re so fucking COOL

IKEBUKURO (pokemon mega center)

so there’s this huge mall. i forgot the name, but it’s got like a lot of floors and they’re MASSIVE

on the 2rd floor is the MEGA POKEMON CENTER!!! i was so HYPED to go in there!!! it was teeming with people but there was just... so much stuff. all kinds of merch. they had plushies of the original 151, a shitton of really cool tshirts, a whole block for detective pikachu-themed merch (pins, socks, canvas bags, shirts, patches, hats, etc), and sooo much more. there’s a giant charizard statue when you walk in, as well as a statue of a pokestop HAHA. i was so excited and i wanted to buy so many things when i was in there bc they had stuff for all the legendaries (LATIOS AND LATIAS STUFF WERE THERE I WAS SO HAPPY)!!! literally anything you can think of, they had in some kind of pokemon print. including underwear. yeah i said it. here’s a really good article that showcases some of the stuff they sold there!

for reference, 100 yen is about 1 usd. a lot of things there were 480 yen ($4.80) or 3000Y ($30) and it was just... beautiful. 

when i was there, yen didn’t feel like it had monetary value since it’s not the currency i’m used to, so i sPENT WAY TOO MUCH AHFJKDFD

they had themed cash registers with each of the starters... i cried :’)

i actually went there a second time but it was packed for a different reason. some idol group was performing on the ground floor and a shitton of girls were screaming fanchants while their jpop boys danced LOLLL. now i know how people see kpop stans ...

AKIHABARA (i went like 8 times)

this is what i like to call my birthplace

we went to the maid cafe. of course we fucking did. i got a dreamland passport and some cat ears. THE MAIDS ALL LOVED HATSUNE MIKU

SPEAKING OF HATSUNE MIKU AKA MY GODDESS, she was pretty popular in akihabara! she was also on some posters in the subway stations (across tokyo, not just in akihabara) and was apparently having some magical mirai concert???

there’s this giant tower called radio kaikan thats right outside the akihabara station that’s filled with all sorts of anime shit. i spent so much money in there. Good God. there was a furret plush for 5400Y and i was so STINGY that day i shouldve BOUGHT IT....  it was a longboi and i was like... sis!!!!

remember how i said my brain didn’t register that yen had monetary value? yeah i spent hundreds of dollars here no cap ...

i went to a kaguya-sama cafe as well on another day bc my friend joe (one of the figureine-collecting weebs) wanted to go and get a chika coaster

i went into a three floor sex shop and gave no fucks, the bottom floor was filled with bdsm shit and LEATHER SCHOOLGIRL OUTFITS and it was WILD. and these two old men were just casually browsing this shit like we weren’t both looking at whips and buttplugs in Public you know

i wasn’t fazed by a lot of the stuff there bc i read Funky fanfiction but the people i went in there with were major uncomfy ... i was like PRUDES HAJKFDAHDS i almost bought something don’t tell anybody

OKAY SO. there’s this place called super potato that has a floor dedicated to old games and consoles. they had so many gameboy advances and gamecubes and old consoles (famicom, dreamcast etc) for CHEAP. they had a gameboy color for 4900Y and a gamecube for 5600Y. a bitch almost cried. they had every old pokemon game under the sun (the original red, blue, yellow, gold and silver) and i ,,, they were 480Y. they were 480Y. that’s five fucking dollars. do you know how much collectors pay for that shit on ebay? HUNDREDS. i could’ve mass bought those and sold them and made so much cash but I DIDN’T.

that store had an original unopened copy of super smash bros melee and pokemon colosseum and i was like... wait if i cop a gamecube i could play pokemon collosseum like a true g... ((i didn’t cop))

but anyways there were a lot of games that didn’t make it to america (including mother 3! which my friend connor bought! as well as the console to play it!) and just... so many old things i grew up with ... 

whenever i walked out of the super potato we’d end up in an alley where all the girls who work at cafes were advertising their stuff

i always took the flyers from the girls bc they spoke their cute english to me and i was like... i’d die for you, yknow that?

ALL KINDS OF CAFES. regular maid cafe, pirate cafe, ninja cafe (you could do that thing where you karate chop a wooden block in half), sailor cafe (as in actual ship captains), shrine maiden cafe, vampire cafe, prince cafe (for the ladies ;3), catgirl cafe, bunny girl cafe... i took all of the goddamn flYERS THEY WERE ALL SO CUTE :( i wanted to go so bad...

FUJI Q HIGHLAND (also known as the time i flipped my shit and went on rollercoasters)

when i found out about fuji-q, i told my group that we HAD to go. i didn’t want to go to an onsen. i wanted to go to fuji-q. i had to. i love rollercoasters, it’s my passion, my driving fORCE IN LIFE

so fuji-q is home to 4 record-breaking rollercoasters! u got fast boi aka jojo reference do-dodonpa; EXTREME TALL BOI fujiyama; superior to x2 at six flags eejanaika; and the steepest rollercoaster in the world TAKABISHA ... i got to ride fujiyama, eejanaika, and takabisha! the scariest one was probably fujiyama despite it being very cut and dry up for... ever ... 79 meters ... oh god ... i lost my shit on the way down ladies let me TELL YOU

FUJIYAMA ALSO HAS A VIEW OF MT FUJI AND I WAS LIK E”YO GUYS ITS MT FUJI” and then we went down and i screamed

please watch the pov videos for these rides they’re very good but they don’t convey the absurd amount of excitement i had going on these rides

anyways the fuji-q park was having a sword art online collaboration when i visited, so they played SAO music and had cardboard cutouts for them across the park... kirito’s ride was fujiyama (aka the king of them all). i forgot the other ones but those alicization kiddos were there but ion care about ALICE OR EUGEO

the first ride i went on was eejanaika which is a 4d rollercoaster, pretty epic, total Baby Ride though

i went on as a single rider so i ended up getting put in this group with these college kids! the guy i was sitting next to spoke to me in english and asked basic questions: “where are you from?”, “is this [ride] easy for you?”, “how old are you?”, basic stuff. he asked why i was in japan and i told him i was studying at waseda university, and he immediately perked up and went “I GO TO WASEDA!!! WASEDA YEAH!!!” and fist bumped me ... his friends were giggling and kept asking him to ask me questions and it was just. so wholesome.

when we were abt to get on the ride he looks at me and says “my name is soichiro. call me so-chan ok??” and i was like... “so-chan” and his friENDS ALL STARTED GIGGLIGN AND I WAS LIKE U///W///U

while we were going up on the ride, he kept yelling “JESUS FUCK YOU JESUS CHRIST” and my favorite: “JESUS CHRIST WHAT THE FUCK YOU” because apparently fuck cannot be standalone! “what the fuck you” is my new fave insult (i miss you so-chan)

afterwards he kept coughing and was like. dead. his soul left his body. so i asked in him japanese like,,, “daijobu ka?” and he was like “nai.” and i just laughed at him bc BA B Y SO-CHAN CANT HANDLE SOME SPINS 

i bought a corndog at fuji-q at this place called arirang hotdog which is a korean style hotdog place??? BRUH that shit is so good but i shat myself for a good minute afterwards ... damn i want those corndogs

sadly i did not get to go on do-dodonpa because nobody wanted to ride with me and i didn’t want to go by myself >:/// still mad abt that bc that was the FAST BOI ...

also. takabisha. the guiness world record with the 121 degree drop. not even scary. BUT they do hang you there for like 3 seconds before making you go down and i was like “YALL FUCKIN WITH ME” really loud when they hung us there ... PLS watch a pov video you’ll see what i mean ...

HARAJUKU (i totally forgot abt this place OH lord)

i bought ... clothes here ...

they have all those clothes with the random english words on them so OF COURSE i had to buy one AS WELL AS a hat to match!

i also bought one of those ear hats where u press the paws and the ears move ... bts inspired that one

so many people in harajuku absolutely DECKED OUT in fashion. what a bunch of legends.

apparently wearing shirts that say “babygirl” are popular here i have no clue why ,,,, also im pretty sure i remember seeing a shirt that said “call me daddy” and i’m like. Ok Japan

half the shit in english made ZERO SENSE or was SPELLED WRONG and that was common all across japan, not just on harajuku fashion pieces LMAOOOO

deadass i went to a couple businesses (fuji xerox, nissan factory, etc) and they had spelling errors all over the place... nissan really had a placard that said “Prease do not touch” AND I CACKLED hfDSKLJF ilove u nissan

[karmanticmoved]

1-85 uwu

j esus okay

1. describe yourself.

uh,, emotional ig, dumbass, quiet, exhausted all of the time, v queer, healthy mix of feminine and masculine, insecure, and not tha t great tbh. kinda a pussy ass b itch

2. if you could go anywhere for a week all expenses paid where would it be?

idrk. maybe somewhere like a hella nice beach in another country, maybe somewhere in europe. i like travelling but i hate the travel to get there and have no money so i havent put thought into it. maybe hawaii or somewhere like that.

3. do you have siblings?

the one thats still alive is my half brother

4. what is your favorite constellation, why?

orion maybe bc i don't know a lot but i can see that one from my bedroom window even in the city n idk. its comforting. or scorpius cause i'm a scorpio

5. favorite color.

yellow, pink, or blue.

6. what kind of music do you listen to?

almost anything. whatever catches my interest.

7. favorite flower. (you can name as many as you want cause flowers are awesome)

forgot what i said last time but those

yellow carnations i think?

8. if you could do magic, what is the first spell you would learn?

maybe smth to put myself to sleep immediately bc f uCk

9. favorite childhood memory.

my summer camp memories are pretty great. also memories of my dad and i going fishing are good.

10. have you ever been cheated on?

i mean in theory i couldve been bc online relationships but no. n im polyam and have identified as such for a majority of my relationships so no.

11. if you could describe your perfect room, what would it be?

big but not too big, yknow? like big enough that it can be filled and have room to walk around and lay on the ground or whatever but not Empty. and a pretty big bed to stretch out on, n a closet in the room. multiple windows w blackout curtains so theres light but it can be blocked out. n fluffy rugs or carpeting but preferably rugs in case smth spills so we can get it out of at least Remove the rug. and probably a cat tree thing in corner for dipper. n a computer desk and actual lights that light up the whole room. but probably,, fairy lights too bc full lights too bright. and i kinda want a pink room but blue or yellow work also. a nd pride flags on the walls + posters and various other stuff bc plain walls are boring. and tons n tons of b ooks too.

12. favorite animal.

river otter

13. what was the last photo you took of?

cat

14. do you believe in soul mates?

i'm not sure. i do kinda think there are people who you will like. really really click with and who become so important in your life that they're like. apart of u yknow? but i don't think that anyone as an individual needs to keep those people in their life forever. they arent destined to stay with them, and they shouldnt force that relationship (platonic, familial, romantic, or whatever) even if they were close for years and years. screw destiny. youll have people you care about, and sometimes you have to break that bond to save yourself, and thats okay. there will be other people who can and will be just as important. that got kinda off topic skbsks. i don't think theres really like Destiny soulmates. but there could be like. soulmates in the sense of for however long we're together, we're soul bonded. even if its not forever. does that even make se nse skbsns

15. do you hang toilet paper over or under?

over is the one thats socially acceptable right

16. your go to place to eat & your favorite thing to get there.

idk theres a place near a movie theater closeish to my house and its a nice little cafe and i dont eat there bc i dont eat much in general but i get their bubble tea and i love. raspberry bubble tea w rose popping bubbles. its comfort drink.

17. do you believe everything happens for a reason?

no. sometimes shit happens for no reason, and its bullshit, but you can't reverse it, so you gotta figure out how to move on from it.

18. guilty pressures?

im assuming thats meant to be pleasures

umm,, idrk. i don't know what exactly i like that would count as a guilty pleasure so,,

19. favorite mythical creature, why?

merpeople are s o cool i fuckin. love funky aquatic pals hell yeah. maybe im just Water babey but. they're rad. dragons are also hella cool bc like dragons???? theyre scaly and prett y and can breathe fire or have wings and kill u?? also like selkies bc again. water. but i used to hear a lot of stories abt them and theyre so nea t

20. something most people don’t know about you.

i have the potential to be a huge asshole and also kinda Wish to fuckin murder someone sometimes but. i act nice most of the time anyway.

not murder murder but i can get angr y enough that i just wanna Stab smth

21. where did you grow up, what was it like?

grew up kinda near the edge of the city, still in it but not like the main city area. in western washington. it was kinda rly boring, i used to spend a lot more time outside or just by myself playing with leaves or toys or whatever. when i had friends i played make believe w them even when outside of school. so yeah. boring id say.

22. do you believe aliens exist?

sure.

23. what was your last google search?

other than names for some actors n stuff, i was looking up various star wars things

24. what did your last relationship teach you?

the one that like. ended? i guess thatd be. be careful with your own feelings and try to figure them out before jumping into anything, and also don't try to force smth that in reality isnt really working.

25. would you relocate for love?

honestly yeah

26. do you hold grudges or forgive easy?

both. it just depends on how badly i or someone i care about was hurt by it. more likely to hold a grudge if a friend was hurt by someone d eep enough to leave a lasting impact or if they don't get a genuine apology i will be 🔫🔫. or if the person keeps hurting them. even if that person is also my friend.

27. favorite book.

favorite graphic novel is bloom by kevin panetta

favorite books in general are autoboyography, more happy than not, and what if its us. all gay. i know. its okay. im a kinnie.

28. do you consider yourself an extrovert or introvert?

introvert by far

29. have you ever kept a journal, do you now?

i tried once. i probably will have to once i go see a therapist, or at least one for my Bad Thoughts

30. top 5 favorite movies.

in no particular order

little shop of horrors, love simon, coco, it (2017 and 1990), and shazam! ig? maybe others but i definitely Forgot all the shit ive watched

31. do you believe that everything happens for a reason?

no

32. what is your greatest fear?

definitely gotta be all of the people i love hating me and abandoning me or secretly hating me and then leaving me without saying anything. and the worst part is im always afraid its gonna happen babeyy

33. favorite alcoholic beverage.

im baby

34. most embarrassing thing you’ve done.

im embarrassed by my own existence. i don't remember the Most embarrassing thing

35. do you believe in ghosts?

not until i have proof that i can actually trust and believe in

36. what is the best and worst part of your personality?

idk ig im nice. but im also. very easily set off on certain emotions especially the bad ones which sucks like especially jealousy bc i dont wanna!! feel jealous!! tho i think that ties into my greatest fear bc my brain immediately tells me im useless to everyone and they hate me. but. sometimes i get jealous and then feel bad for that and then hate myself for all of it. bc my friends deserve to hang out w other people and care about other people im just fucking stupid babey !!

37. should you split the dinner bill?

i rly don't get why you wouldnt tbh like if u both wanna be there u should both pay. but if one person gonna pay it should be the person that asked.

38. are you a good liar?

most of the time. when it comes to my mental health i can either lie great or im literally breaking down in front of the person so

39. what keeps you up at night?

depressing thoughts. anxiety about everything. wishing i could cuddle and fall asleep w jay. sometimes i just cant sleep bc im too restless.

40. would you rather go without your phone or music?

music. i need my phone to text my friends and i Need my friends

41. do you believe in god?

what god would let the world get to the point its at. what god would allow people to do such fucked up shit.

no. i don't.

42. how do you relax when frustrated?

cry, take a nap, take a shower, listen to music, cuddle dipper

43. what’s something that offends you?

when people go "oh yeah i support gay rights but im still gonna eat at chick fil a bc its good" like i get so fucking. pissed off by that. youre not gonna fucking s ta rv e without their goddamn chicken. i know a bi person who goes there and says its okay bc they dont Directly Give Their money to Specifically anti gay organisations but im just. ugh. fucking pissed bc there are other places to get food just avoid the one place for fucks sake. their food is good it doesnt matter. its like saying yeah pewdiepie is a bad person and nazi and a racist asshole but his videos r funni haha so im gonna watch him anyway

44. favorite food

i hate myself whenever i eat food

45. if you were on a 10 hour flight and could sit and talk to any person the entire time, who would it be?

@destinedformuchmore or @pinaplelee

46. when do you feel the most confident?

never? but ig i feel confident when working on tech construction during theater tech. as long as i know what im doing.

47. what do you do in your free time?

sleep. draw. cry. play video games. talk to my friends.

48. is there anyone who has completely lost your respect

matpat did for being a dick abt neopronouns and making a transphobic joke and only apologizing when a cis person told him to. not when hundreds of trans people did. and also other jokes that are inherently offensive to various groups. a n d for making extremely not Child friendly jokes in his videos which are very much targeted towards kids. say what you will about the target audience, there are a lot of children who watch them. please stop making creepy nsfw jokes if you won't even swear, sir.

49. have you ever broken someone’s heart?

i guess so yeah. but she also broke mine first.

50. did/do you play sports in school?

i did. i don't anymore bc highschool sports are bullshit but. basketball, ultimate, and soccer.

51. when are you happiest?

talkin 2 jay prolly

52. coffee or tea?

tea

53. what is one possession you own you wouldn’t want to live without?

my binder. or my stuffed cat puppet thing ive had since i was 7

54. what is the first thing you notice about a person?

their general emotions, mostly. like if theyre in a good mood or if theyre bored or distracted or whatever. or if they seem interested in actually talking to me

55. what is your favorite season, why?

fall. my birthday, the atmosphere is nice, it's pretty, its hoodie weather.

56. what makes you laugh?

stupid little comments or jokes my friends make tend to make me laugh a lot harder than i should but jabdn

57. are you a clean or messy person?

a mix. i Cannot have some things messy or i will ksjqkd. Die but i don't make my bed too often bc its ha rd when its against 3 walls.

58. what is important for a successful relationship?

communication communication communicati

talk about ur goddamn problems n keep talking to each other.

59. what was your upcoming like?

if thats supposed to be upbringing

idk, very relaxed. pretty easygoing and kinda boring.

60. favorite holiday?

any holiday in december rly. i don't celebrate a Lot but the atmosphere and others celebrating is nice to see. i kinda wish my parents did more to embrace the jewish part in our family blike. whatever. christmas is fun.

61. what is the first thing you’d do if you won the lottery?

give half of it to my parents. and then probably use it for plane ticket

62. what’s the best pizza topping combination?

hawaiian pizza. pinapple n canadian bacon ty

63. favorite outdoor activity.

frisbee

64. how are you? honestly.

not great. i want highschool to end.

65. would you rather go camping in the woods or stay at a beach resort?

idk. camping is fun but if i get to stay at the resort for free i would rly love 2 stay at a resort tbh ive never done that

66. what is the most beautiful thing in nature?

waterfalls. or rivers or just. water in nature. and very green forests. aNd snow.

67. favorite type of candy?

none

68. if your life was a book, what would be the title?

i can and will do arson, an autobiography

69. what movie quotes do you use of a regular bases?

i quote john mulaney and whatever my obsessions are pretty regularly

70. what was cool when you were young but not cool now?

silly bandz. pokemon cards. these weird unicorn figures i collected

71. what’s the craziest conversation you have ever eves dropped on?

im mostly the one having the weird conversations

72. what’s the most interesting documentary you’ve ever watched?

i watched one about dogs and cats and their evolution which was lit

73. what’s the worst hairstyle you’ve had?

when i let the lady just go fuckin ham on my hair bc i was watching spirit that horse movie and didnt wanna stop so it was. rly bad bangs and hella short in back but not the sides

74. what do you like to cook?

whatever im hungry for. i don't have the energy to cook a lot

75. what’s the coolest animal you’ve seen in the wild?

really pretty tropical fish

76. what’s the funniest tv show you’ve ever seen?

idk. i rly like schitts creek its pretty amusing

77. do you usually follow your heart or your head?

heart at first but my head if things get bad

78. what is your favorite quote?

"i have a splitting headache and i think i'm dying. how are you?"

or a character just saying "try harder" when another failed to do smth.

this is supposed to be deep or whatever but im in a Mood

79. what’s the weirdest crush you have ever had?

once had a crush on a character in a minecraft parody lmao

80. what’s your love language?

sending shit that makes me think of them. n just. making tons of stuff for them both online and irl like bracelets.

81. do you ever feel alone?

oh yeah. all the time. im not but it feels like i am which sucks

82. ever been bullied?

yeah

83. are you usually early or late?

late bc of my parents rip

84. what kind of art do you enjoy most?

drawing, or writing. also theater.

85. what do you wish you knew more about?

i just wish i could remember everything ive learned more about. i know a lot i just forget all.

id like to know more about forensics tho