#bc it was a lot of bob content i was thinking of when i heard it

[nejackdaw]

Someone made a post a while ago about how Ford is so Jekyll coded and (1) they're so right (2) with that in mind this song is Billford

[bradshawssugarbaby]

Hurricane - Bradley Bradshaw x Reader

summary: Bradley's regretted breaking off his relationship with you for months, but when he sees you walking into the country club after his round of golf, he knows he has to fix things.

a/n: I haven't written much angst before but I'm really trying to branch out a little bit. Inspired by Hurricane by Luke Combs, and also this weird recurring dream I keep having.

pairing: Bradley Bradshaw x reader

warnings/content: buckle up bc there's a lot? angst (happy ending), parental death, depression, hurt, cancer, goose's accident + carole's reaction, carole literally never getting over losing goose, bradley being a commitmentphobe, pregnancy (i think that's it?), also entirely unrealistic bc you know what? I can't keep roo sad for long.

word count: 3.6k

taglist: @avengersfan25, @nouis-bum, @floydsmuse, @mamachasesmayhem, @jessicab1991, @atarmychick007, @b-bradshaw, @djs8891

Then you rolled in with your hair in the wind Baby, without warning I was doin' alright but just your sight Had my heart stormin'

Bradley narrowed his eyes beneath his sunglasses, the glare of the hot mid-morning sun harsh on his chocolate brown eyes. He grabbed his nine-iron from his golf bag, taking a practice swing before teeing up for his next shot. Bob, Jake, Reuben and Javy stood to the side behind him, watching as he lined up to take his shot. He hadn’t golfed in years, in fact, he’d only ever golfed a handful of times in his life, all of them back when he lived in Virginia. His uncle had taught him when he was 15, a welcome distraction when his mom became sick, and he’d gone out a few times when he was in college after a roommate of his on the school’s golf team had invited him out. He held his breath as he heard the club make contact with the small, white orb, watching as it soared through the air, disappearing somewhere onto the course. Jake let out an impressive whistle as he looked on, placing his hands on his hips as he shook his head in disbelief.

“You’ve never golfed before, Bradshaw? You sure?” He drawled, raising one of his manicured (though he’d deny it if asked) blonde eyebrows suspiciously.

“I told you, a handful of times. Not never.”

“You did say less than five,” Bob shrugged as he cleaned his glasses before replacing them on his nose. “Less than five suggests you haven’t really hit a course.”

“Not to mention you said in years. That was the swing of a man who’s at least hit a driving range a few times,” Reuben pointed out to the course in the general direction of where Bradley’s ball had landed as Javy, Bob and Jake nodded in agreement. 

“I wish Nat had tagged along, she wouldn’t ride my ass this hard,” Bradley huffed, shaking his head. 

“Nat doesn’t golf. You know that. She acted disgusted that I even asked,” Jake shrugged.

“Maybe it was how you asked,” Bob suggested as he disguised his jab at Jake as a helpful criticism.

 “Just take your turn, Robert,” Jake hissed, rolling his eyes dramatically as Bob smirked.

Bradley normally would have joined in with a quip of his own directed at Jake, but his heart just wasn’t in it. His heart wasn’t even in the game. The only reason why he’d agreed to go golfing with the guys for their usual monthly game was because you left him. He needed to get over you and move on - it’d been six months and with no deployments coming up, he had nothing to focus 100% of his attention onto. Reuben had noticed it first - Bradley was withdrawn on nights out, his usually chatterbox self now quiet, calm and keeping to himself, barely breaking eye contact with his beer bottle. Then came Natasha’s barrage of questions - he knew she meant well, but God, it was hard to listen to. 

He didn’t want to admit it to himself, but he knew why you left. And it was entirely his fault. You’d gotten upset because he’d stopped spending as much time with you, kept getting cold feet about committing to your relationship. He’d never tell you why he couldn’t commit - it was too hard for him to explain to anyone, really. In fact, he was fairly confident that Reuben was the only other person aware of it. 

Bradley wanted to be the partner you needed - he really did. He wanted to be the doting, affectionate boyfriend who’d whisk you off somewhere beautiful, propose to you, start a family with 2.2 kids and a dog, cart the kids around to sports practices on weekends - the American dream. He knew you deserved that much. And yet, no matter how badly he wanted to give that to you - he couldn’t. He’d told you he didn’t want it - he didn’t want to get married, he didn’t want to have kids, he never wanted it. He watched you fall apart the minute the words left his mouth, and it killed him inside. He wanted to hold you close and tell you he was making a mistake, tell you it wasn’t true and he didn’t mean it, but he couldn’t. 

He couldn’t, because he was terrified. 

Growing up without his dad was one of the hardest things he could have experienced, he was sure of it. He was too young to truly remember how his mom reacted when she learned her husband had been killed in a training exercise, but he remembered her crying a lot, feeling paralyzed by loss and guilt, angry with the world for taking the man she loved away from her. He remembered as he grew up, she never remarried, never went on a date, never even as much as looked at another man. His dad was her everything, and losing him crushed her. 

When she got sick, Bradley was a teenager - old enough to understand what it meant for her, what her odds of recovery were, and old enough to be realistic about the future. When they found out she wasn’t going to get better, he’d half expected her to react the way she did when his dad died, but instead, she seemed almost at peace with the idea. She’d spent 14 years of her life missing his dad, and she knew that, even though she was horrified by the thought of leaving Bradley on his own, she wouldn’t have to spend another minute missing her husband.

Bradley decided then that he’d never want to put someone through that. He’d never be able to hurt someone he loved like this - leave them widowed before they turned 30, alone with a toddler at home to raise on the opposite side of the country from their family and friends, with nothing but a military pension and an apology over his death. 

It was at 16 years old that Bradley decided, if he wanted to become a pilot, he was going to have to spend life alone, and for the most part, he was ok with that. 

That was, until he met you.

He tried to deny his feelings, pretending you were just a casual fling, some fun sex here and there between deployments and missions and nothing more. That was, until three months in, he accidentally told you he loved you. It wasn’t a lie, he did love you, but it caught him off guard when he said it - he didn’t mean to blow his cover and let his guard down like that. And when you said it back? He knew it was game over. 

He tried his hardest to push his fears aside, he tried SO hard. He was getting older and beginning to realize he didn’t want to spend the rest of his life alone, especially as he neared the mandatory 20 years of service cutoff for aviators. He’d grown almost fond of the idea of settling down with you, seeing you with a ring on your finger, picturing you with a baby in you, his baby. He wanted it. He wanted all of it. But, the fears and anxiety he had reared its ugly head, and he couldn’t bring himself to get past it. 

It was on their last mission, when he had to eject and landed in the middle of a snowy mountain, unsure if he’d make it back home to you. His mind raced with thoughts of how you’d react if he didn’t make it home - how you’d crumple to the floor when you saw the two uniformed officers on your doorstep, the blood-curdling scream you’d let out in pain when you heard them say it, tears staining your pretty little face as you were handed that folded American flag - he couldn’t bear it. He couldn’t stand the idea of putting you through everything his mom had gone through. Not when you were so young and had everything ahead of you. When you could find a man who wasn’t putting his life in danger nearly every damn day, risking himself and risking a chance he might not come home to you. 

This golf trip was meant to take his mind off you. Reuben had mentioned it in passing to Jake and Bob, who exchanged worried looks with one another. Javy had overheard Nat’s line of questioning when he and Mickey returned to the table with a fresh round of beers, both of them offering Bradley silent looks of sympathy as they nodded in agreement to Nat’s advice. Bradley was struggling, in over his head with emotions and regret and sadness, but he knew he’d fucked it all up. And he knew that even if he tried, you wouldn’t want him back, and who could blame you? 

Bob had suggested he reach out to you and apologize, and for a while, Bradley considered it. He strongly considered calling you, going to your house, begging for forgiveness and begging you to take him back, but after how you reacted when he broke things off with you, he wouldn’t even take him back. He’d been a dick in every sense of the word, and now, he had to try and move on, adjusting to life without you in it. 

The next nine holes passed by with little conversation from Bradley and worried glances exchanged between his friends. He wasn’t in the mood for talking, he’d explain, shrugging the concern off before focusing back on the game. Bradley was thankful for his friends’ efforts, but it was beginning to feel like nothing would help him move on. 

He slumped down into a chair at a table in the country club after their round of golf, sipping back the beer Jake bought him. He caught himself downing the liquid quicker than he should have, but at this point, being drunk would at least provide him with that much needed numbness he craved. He could hear Bob bickering with Jake over golf scores and who truly won, prompting an eye roll from Javy as he pulled the crumpled scoresheets from his pocket and placed them on the table. Reuben noticed the glazed over look in Bradley’s eye and clapped a sympathetic hand down on his shoulder. 

Bradley was about to thank Reuben for being there for him when he saw your face. You were walking into the country club with a couple of your friends, laughing and smiling as you spoke. 

God, he loved that smile. 

He gulped back the rest of his drink before placing the glass back down on the table, the sound of Bradley slamming the glass down a little harder than he intended prompting Jake to spin his head around as he saw you.

“Oh..shit,” he murmured as Bob and Javy both turned to look discreetly towards you.

Bradley’s eyes widened as you walked past the bar, revealing a very unexpected new figure. He blinked his eyes a few times to ensure they weren’t playing tricks on him - positive that this had to be some kind of optical illusion or something. It was impossible. You couldn’t be.

“Pregnant.” Jake whispered as he leaned into the table, “She’s pregnant,”

“Did you know, Bradley?” Bob inquired as he pushed his glasses back up the bridge of his nose.

“N-no.” Bradley choked out, feeling the walls closing in around him as the room started to spin.

Without hesitation, Bradley rose from his seat and made his way over to you, despite the protests from Bob and Reuben, the two voices of reason to Javy and Jake’s voices of impulse. Bradley approached you cautiously, clearing his throat for a moment to garner your attention. You spun your head around, your cheeks rosy and your skin glowing with that pregnancy glow everyone always talked about. Bradley had never really believed in that kind of stuff, but you were proving him wrong. 

“Bradley?” you asked, your face paleing to a shade of ghostly white. 

“Can…can we talk, please? I need to talk to you,” Bradley rambled with desperation written on his face.

You huffed a sigh, nodding your head slowly as you excused yourself from your friends, who were now whispering and exchanging uncomfortable glances with one another. Bradley followed closely behind you as you stepped out into the fresh air, finding a discreet corner of the parking lot to discuss everything from the last six months. 

“I…Is it mine?” Bradley whispered, almost afraid to hear the answer as his eyes wandered to the bump that was evident under your sundress.

You sighed again, following Bradley’s gaze down to your abdomen, a protective hand resting on your bump as you nodded slowly, humming in confirmation.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He frowned, shaking his head quickly, “I-I, I would have helped you.”

“Bradley,” you said, narrowing your eyes and shaking your head quickly, “You told me you didn’t want this. You dumped me and told me you never wanted to settle down or have a family, you didn’t want to be with me anymore, and being in a long-term relationship wasn’t what you ever wanted. You told me you didn’t love me. So please, tell me why I should have told you?”

“Because,” he said softly, his heart aching as he heard your side of things, “I didn’t mean any of that. I was wrong.”

“Oh, you were wrong? Tell me, were you always wrong, or are you only wrong now that you’ve seen me six months later, heavily pregnant?” 

Bradley was speechless. He gazed down at his feet, kicking at the pavement in his golf cleats. He sighed as he thought for a moment, taking a second of quiet reflection to compose his thoughts before speaking. He wanted to get this right. He couldn’t afford to fuck it up again.

“I was always wrong. I was wrong when I said it, and I knew I was wrong,” he shook his head vigorously before looking up to meet your gaze, “Did I ever tell you about my mom?”

“You told me she died when you were a teenager, and you didn’t really mention anything else about her. Or anyone in your family, for that matter.”

“Right,” he nodded his head slowly, taking a deep breath before beginning to explain. “My dad died when I was 2. He was an RIO, a Radar Intercept Officer. You know Maverick, right?”

“Mhmm,” you nodded slowly, a look of annoyance flashing across your face as you listened to Bradley, you were used to his excuses, and you were really hoping this wasn’t another one. 

“So, Maverick was my dad’s pilot. Best friends. Did everything together. He was flying when my dad died, their plane lost control, had to eject, my dad hit the canopy. Died instantly.” Bradley paused, taking another deep breath as he felt himself getting choked up, “My mom, she, uh, she was really young. My dad was 25, my mom was 23. He was her high school sweetheart. She was devastated. I was too young to remember a lot, but I remember her hurting, and being sad all the time, unable to function some days because she just missed him so much,” he explained as tears began to roll down his cheeks.

“Bradley, I’m sorry,” you sighed, shaking your head as you sympathetically rubbed his bicep to comfort him.

“I just…when she died, she was…peaceful, I guess, because she knew she wouldn’t have to miss him anymore. She wouldn’t be lonely. She never remarried or dated after him, she couldn’t bring herself to. She’s buried with her wedding ring still on her finger. I couldn’t bring myself to take it off her,” he took another deep breath, exhaling sharply before looking up at you. 

“I couldn’t do that to you,” he finally said, blinking back the tears that threatened to spill over again, “I couldn’t leave you like my mom. Heartbroken and alone your whole life. She never moved on, and I didn’t want that for you if we got married. God, I would have given anything to marry you. I would have taken you to the courthouse and married you on the spot if you would have agreed to it. But, I couldn’t risk breaking your heart. Not like that.”

“Bradley, you’ve always come home in one piece,” you said softly, fingers still stroking his upper arm soothingly.

“But I almost didn’t. I had to eject and all I could think about was you getting that knock at the door and going through what she went through, and I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t do that to you, or…or to a baby.”

You shook your head, processing everything that Bradley had just said as he poured his heart out to you. He’d never opened up like this to you before, but you could tell each and every word was genuine. As much as you hated him for leaving you, you couldn’t deny that you still loved him with all of your heart. 

You missed him. 

You missed waking up to him after the two of you had fallen asleep watching a movie together. You missed the way he yelled at the tv when watching baseball, how passionate he got over football games, how he’d pick the olives out of his nachos like a toddler and put them on your plate. You missed how he couldn’t eat apples unless they were baked in a pie, how he’d scarf down an entire red velvet cake if you didn’t gently stop him, then regret it hours later. You missed the way his big brown eyes would stare at you, a look of pure adoration on his face like a lovesick puppy whenever you spoke to someone else, as if he was hanging on every single word that fell from your lips.

You burst into tears, throwing your arms tightly around Bradley as you shook your head. “God, you’re an idiot, you know that?” you murmured, laughing softly as you hugged him.

“I know, I’m the biggest idiot. I still would marry you if you let me. I wanted to have kids with you, I want to be around for this one,” he nodded, gesturing his hands at your bump. 

“Really?”

“Cross my heart,” Bradley said with an expression of complete seriousness on his face, “I wanna know everything about them. Everything. I wanna know what you’re having, what name you’ve picked out, what your cravings are, how you’ve been feeling, when they move, what does it feel like? I want to know how far along you are, and how they’re doing, if they have my nose or your nose, or if they’re gonna be tall like I am, I want to know what helps you sleep at night when you’re pregnant, and what their favourite song is. I want all of it, honey.”

“Ok, ok, slow down, breathe, Bradley,” you chuckled, shaking your head. “Take a walk with me?”

As you and Bradley walked around the pedestrian pathway on the golf course, smiling as you spoke fondly about the baby, answering all of Bradley’s questions. 

“Well, baby’s a girl, I don’t have a name in mind for her yet, I’ve been craving oranges and Sprite, anything sweet and citrusy. I’ve been ok, better now the morning sickness finally dissipated. It feels like bubbles or something when she kicks, it’s like a fluttering, almost? I’m 28 weeks along, so I have about three months left. She looked like she has your nose on the ultrasound, there’s a 50/50 chance on her height, I sleep pretty much sitting upright because I get bad heartburn otherwise, and I play her music all the time. She likes Elvis and The Beach Boys, just like her dad.” 

Bradley’s smile spread wide across his face, a small laugh of disbelief escaping his mouth as he nodded along with your words.

“That’s great. A girl? Really? You’re gonna have a daughter running around,” he said softly, almost as if he was daydreaming about what the little girl would look like.

“We are going to have a daughter.”

“You’re gonna let me be there? After everything?”

“Bradley, as much as I hated you for what you did and how you ended things - I never truly hated you. I loved you, more than anything. I still do.”

He held you tightly, burying his face into your hair as he kissed the top of your head, murmuring softly against your hair. 

“God, I love you so much, honey. I promise, I’m never going to do something stupid like that again.”

“I know you won’t,” you laughed, shaking your head as he looked down at you, “I know you’d never leave Carly and I again.”

Bradley froze in place for a moment as he stared at you, his voice barely above a whisper as he spoke. 

“What did you call her?”

“Carly. I thought, I don’t know, after you told me about your mom just now, I thought maybe you’d like to name the baby after her? Carole’s nice too, I just figured Carly gives her a name that’s her own too, they share the same root.”

“Carly,” he nodded slowly as he repeated it, “I love it.”

Bradley took your hand in his, his large fingers enveloping your hand as he held it tightly, as if he was terrified of letting go. He made that mistake once before, he wasn’t about to do it again. 

[chasesvillainera]

What does Daniel think of Sebastian? p.s. will Daniel be introduced earlier on in this AU?

What is Sebastian’s relationship with everyone?

Do you have a plan for what bionic abilities he’s getting?

Oooh this is a good ask thank you!!

Daniel is peak “walked into an established group and has no clue what’s going on past the stories he heard” representation and I love him. When Leo is taking him around introducing him to the students (because we were robbed of Daniel + students content), he explains Seb to him as “yeah he tried to blow up the academy once. Now he just spends most of his time watching over the kids and making heart eyes at our brother.”

And Sebastian got a huge soft spot for the kiddos, and since by the point Daniel shows up he’s buds with Douglas, he vibes with Daniel pretty quick. He’s collecting little brothers.

I’ll probably bring Daniel in a little earlier in this AU, so I can have him join in the some of the hijinks

Now for: Seb’s Post-Attempted Rebellion Relationships

Bree—MLM/WLW solidarity. They’re buddies but also she is keeping an eye on him. The vibe is sort of “this is my best friend. No I wouldn’t trust him alone for 5 minutes. Yes this makes sense.”

Leo—Hear me out. They’re those friends who look at each other like “wow. What are these fools doing” when Davenport Shenanigans are happening. Also Seb saved Leo’s life that one time so in Leo’s head, it evens out with the attempted murder on Donald and they’re square.

Adam—Here’s the fun one. Adam fucking hates him so much. Doesn’t trust him at all and is very protective of Chase. Was the one begging Chase to just send him to prison and forget about him after the rebellion. Adam’s constantly trying to prove he’s still evil (picture Leo vs. Marcus but a lot more cringe bc it’s Adam). They share custody of Bob but Adam’s always worried Seb’s gonna kidnap Bob and kill him or something. Eventually Sebastian starts hating him back because what else is there to do?

Douglas—I’ve gone into detail about them in another post, but basically Douglas doesn’t trust him post-rebellion at first, but then they spend more time together and become Unethical Science buds while Chase is in the background begging them to wear safety goggles.

Tasha—I’m still working on this one but I know I’m gonna rewrite Forbidden Hero solely so I can have a “Tasha meets her stepson’s bf who tried to kill her husband not long ago” scene. She’s not that mad about it people try and kill Donald all the time.

Perry- Grudging respect

Also I’ve decided that he, Taylor, and Logan are siblings

[kn1feinthec0ffee]

shave and a haircut - spencer reid

bi!spencer reid x gn!reader

summary: spencer needs a haircut, and you just so happen to know how to give him one.

warnings: none really, touch starved!spence 🥺

word count: 1,293

notes: this is an uber sweet amount of softness that i will not apologize for bc i love it so very much 

also bi!spence. yeah i said it,, what ab it??

********************

you had noticed spencer’s thoughts about his hair even before he did. not that you were a mind reader, but you were essentially the next best thing.

you watched him constantly brush flyaway strands behind his ears to keep them out of the way as he pored over documents. the way he scrunched his nose adorably when garcia playfully tugged on a strand of it. it was obvious - to you, at least - that he wanted a change.

  “i’ve wanted it cut for a while now,” spencer exhaled, shaking his shaggy locks. “it just keeps getting in the way.”

  “i could always give you a trim if you’d like,” you inserted yourself into the conversation.

spencer’s cheeks appeared to tinge pink at the suggestion, but he quickly nodded. “if that would be okay with you?” you giggled, furling up his curls into a messy pile.

  “of course it’s okay with me, i’d do anything for you, spence.” he didn’t know how serious you were, but he felt his heart swell at your meaningful words. “can i come over, let’s say... tomorrow afternoon?”

he barely managed an awestruck nod before you were on your way. perhaps if he weren’t so busy overanalyzing what you had meant, he would’ve noticed the newfound pep in your step that lasted the rest of the day.

——————————

  “wow,” you bobbed your head as your eyes scanned the muted tones of spencer’s apartment. “this is... exactly what i was expecting.”

  “hey,” he feigned offense. “are you saying i’m predictable?”

you pretended to be in deep contemplation at the simple query. “yes, yes i am, i think that’s exactly what i’m saying.”

spencer wanted to roll his eyes, but you were too adorable for him to possibly feel any semblance of annoyance.

once you had laid out a towel underneath the chair and clipped a cape over his shoulders, you clasped your hands together in excitement. “okay! what are we thinking?”

  “i don’t really know, something short i guess?” spencer shrugged. “you can surprise me, if you want. i trust you. just please leave it curly.”

  “it’s been short before, but that was when i used to straighten it and gel it back,” he shivered just thinking about the slick stickiness he used to slather over his hands and onto his head.

  “you did what?” you gasped. “i’ve got to see a picture of that sometime. i’m just picturing little baby reid with his hair combed over to the side.”

  “well, it was only a couple years ago, so i’m not sure if that qualifies-” spencer began.

  “oh it absolutely qualifies. once a baby, always baby. in my book anyway,” you mumbled, more to yourself than anyone else, but that didn’t stop reid from blushing once more. you always seemed to bring that out in him. “i bet you pulled a lot of ladies & gents with a hair cut like that, huh, hot shot?”

he scoffed, picturing the image of him actually having too many people trying to get with him. “oh yeah, they couldn’t get enough of me with all my statistics on kidnapping victimology and the likelihood of being abducted from high-density social situations.”

  “hey,” you curled a finger under his chin to tilt his head up towards you. “don’t do that. you sell yourself short, sweetheart. you’re much more lovely and charming than you give yourself credit for.”

at this moment, spencer was 99% sure you had no idea what you were doing to him. he was falling deeper in love with you as every minute passed, and while he enjoyed it, it was simultaneously excruciating. this is just supposed to be a haircut, he thought. get it together, spencer. you don’t wanna mess this up.

he settled on a simple, “thanks,” as you began snipping bits of hair off in a seemingly disorganized fashion. 

he was so used to haircuts being awkward and impersonal, but this was something else entirely. the soft little tugs he felt as you pulled a strand out between your fingers nearly made his heart stop. the way you hummed a tune to yourself as you diligently worked made him feel so safe and calm. 

spencer only noticed his eyes had closed when he felt the warmth radiating off of you leave him. you were stood over your tools, picking up an electric razor as you walked back over to him. “so much freedom you’ve given me,” you tutted to yourself.

he remained quiet as the repetitive buzz of the razor filled the room. you tilted his head forward, resting it gently on your torso as you gave the hair around the nape of his neck a closer shave. you weren’t entirely certain due to the volume of the razor, but you were pretty sure you had heard spencer let out a contented little whimper against the fabric of your sweater.

the realization hit you like a bus that spencer had most likely been somewhat deprived of touch for most of his life. it made sense; he never seemed to seek out touch from anyone who wasn’t a close friend or relative. a warm feeling blossomed in your heart at the thought that you were providing him with the touch he had deserved for so long.

  “having fun, pretty boy?” you mused - teasing lightly as not to mock him or hurt his feelings - giving his locks a playful tussle. spencer wanted to respond, he really did, but he was so overwhelmingly soothed. your hands were in his hair, trailing across his skin; he was resting his head against the softness of your clothing, but more importantly you as your scent enveloped him.

all he could manage was a brief, “mhm,” too blissed out to conjure up any more intelligent terms from his nearly endless vernacular. he couldn’t help the pout that graced his lips when you pulled away from him, the lack of your relaxing presence filling him with a miniscule amount of sorrow. 

  “alright, time for the big reveal,” you handed him a mirror. “what do you think? did i totally screw up?” you looked to him for his reaction. 

spencer saw that you had given him a side shave, letting his natural curls rest on top and flop in whatever direction they saw fit. he had had hairstyles similar to this before, but this one felt... different. special even. although that could be due to the fact that it was you who had cut his hair. for once in his life, he wasn’t sure. 

  “i- i love it,” he flashed you an award winning smile, filling your tummy with butterflies. “thank you so much, y/n.”

  “no, thank you, the pleasure’s all mine. plus, i think having such a good model helped the end result, don’t you?” you smirked, twirling one of his curls around your finger. his cheeks heated up at the compliment, and your grin only intensified as he answered with a quick nod. 

“oooh, do you want me to wash your hair? that way you can get any leftover hairs out so they don’t bother you when you go to sleep.” spencer nodded eagerly at your suggestion, a warm feeling spreading through his tummy as you smiled. “okay, i’ll clean up out here and throw away all the hair. why don’t you head into the bathroom and bring a folding chair with you, so i can set it up in front of the sink?”

he smiled to himself as you rambled on and tittered about, cleaning the remains of his old haircut. he headed to the bathroom with that same lovesick grin on his face. spencer knew you’d end up being the death of him, and for some reason, he he didn’t seem to mind.

*******************

as i’m finishing this it’s 1:55am on wednesday and i’m practically half asleep, so the ending prob isn’t great or grammatically correct but if i have the time, i’ll edit this tomorrow

edit: i added a paragraph & tweaked some sentences but i think its a bit better now :)

tags: @sojournmichael @stinkyelf @crazyfore3 @cal-ifornication @eggygorl02 @howdycharlie @eosprincess @mortallythoughtfulgurl @illuxions-x @unlikelyempathpruneauthor @blankets-for-bees @holycandypizza @flyingbabyunicornnamedangel @lovelyrdjr @elitereid @minnie-bby @rexorangecouny @ashwarren32 @fantastic-fans @keomoon @achieveonyourown @jjtheangel @whoreforthebau @theonewithcriminalminds @angelbunnyoxo​

[dummy-thicc-demons]

Obey Me boys playing Friday Night Funkin’

I’ve been obsessed with Friday Night Funkin’ lately so take these headcanons.

MC introduced the boys to FnF....

Lucifer:

Won’t play unless Diavolo tells him to bc Luci believes himself to be above playing computer games

Will watch the others play and make comments whenever they miss a beat

Secretly wants to play though and he’ll give in to the desire in the privacy of his own room or study

If he’s feeling nice, he’ll let MC come and play with him, but it always get spicy at the end bc Luci isn’t going to let MC leave without paying a price

He’s pretty average at the game and he hates that he’s not perfect at it

Struggles between wanting to practice and wanting to stop lowering himself just to join the others

He doesn’t have a favorite Week but he does really like the track Winter Horrorland, and when the update comes out, he also likes the track Monster

Mammon:

Is actually kinda good at the game?? Definitely above average

This man is crazy good at dancing so rhythm comes easily to him and definitely freestyle dances to the tracks

Don’t ask him to play an instrument though because he’s hopeless in that area

Will try it to gamble with his brothers and makes them make bets on who would win or lose

I don’t know why I feel like Mammy would like Week 1, but once Week 7 was released, he falls in love with it

His favorite track is DadBattle and always bops his head to the beat

Will brag and always tells MC to watch him win then proceeds to lose

Levi:

Expert at the game

Because of his mad gaming skills, hitting the keys on time is easy

It also helps that he is fantastic at DDR

His biggest flex is being able to play all of the Weeks on hard mode

His ability comes from practice and dedicating his blood, sweat, and tears to gaming in general

He wants to know more about the plot and makes theories

His favorite track is Satin Panties bc he loves the duet sound is that really the only reason levi?

Satan:

Interested in the game but he doesn’t love it like some of his brothers

The music is not his taste but he’ll admit that they have their charm

He’s average at the game and he’s okay with it

He would practice but he gets too into it when he does play and ends up getting angry every time he loses

They definitely needed to buy new laptops because he ended up breaking them

Doesn’t have a favorite Week but does love the track Philly

He finds joy in the line “shoot them up and take them out”

Asmo:

Doesn’t play the game at all and is really bad at it anyway

He doesn’t want to be stressed and start sweating bc that’s unseemly and gross

Still really likes the game though and enjoys watching his brothers flail around, particularly Mammon

Likes most of the tracks but he’s not the biggest fan of Week three, Monster, or Winter Horrorland

He loves Mommy Must Murder and wants to be her as well as fuck date her

His favorite track is Senpai but he hates the character Senpai

Thinks Lemon Demon and Senpai’s third form are disgusting inside and out

Beel:

Doesn’t play often and would rather eat and watch because his brothers don’t want him to get his crumbs and grease on their laptops

When he does play, this man is a GOD

FnF just comes naturally to him and it both impresses and pisses off his brothers

Beel is a natural at the bass or the drums so it helps with his FnF skills

This man is just perfect at rhythm but pls don’t ask him to freestyle dance to the tracks

He likes the happy tones of the first two songs in Week 5 and gets hungry during Winter Horrorland

He likes what happens in Stress of Week 7 because he thought it was wholesome

Belphie:

Doesn’t play and doesn’t want to play

He likes just listening and dozing off

His brothers coerce him every so often but he’s just bad at the game

His favorite place to be is leaning on the shoulder of whoever is playing

His favorite Week is Week 6 because it’s chill

Doesn’t really care about the characters but he’ll like whoever MC likes

Will make fun of you if you lose or miss a lot of beats

Barbatos:

Do I even have to say? This man is perfect at the game

Will play if Diavolo or MC asked him to

He was caught off guard when he played Week 7 on hard mode

He still won but it wasn’t a perfect score

He only missed a few beats and no one noticed but him

It’s okay because he played it a second time and it was flawless

His favorite track is High bc he likes the chill bob sound and always has a small smile whenever he hears it

Diavolo:

Diavolo is so bad at it someone pls help him

What he lacks in skill, he makes up in enthusiasm

Absolutely adores the game, it’s music, it’s characters, and it’s concept

Will listen to the soundtrack often as a stress reliever

Will call MC to have tea with him as they play FnF in the garden

He loves the energy of Week 4 and his favorite track is MILF

Wants MC to wear Mommy Must Murder’s outfit

Solomon:

Heard of the game before but never played it himself until MC brought it up

Above average player

He plays with Levi sometimes and that’s where he gets his skill from

Definitely a huge fan of mods bc he likes the extra content and admires the work that other people put in

Doesn’t play on his own since he’s a busy magic man but he will play if the group is playing

Vibes to the music but won’t listen to it outside of the game

Teams up with Diavolo to try to get MC in the milf outfit

Simeon:

Another example of can’t play for shit

He can’t even use his D.D.D correctly and you expect me to believe that he can play FnF?

This kind of music is new to him and was startled and overwhelmed when he first heard it

Is amazed at Levi, Barbatos, and Beel’s mastery of the game

Plays whenever Luke or MC asks him to

He also likes to pester Lucifer and try to get him to play the game

Like Beel, he enjoys the happy vibe of Week 5

Luke:

Good at the game

He’s a quick learner so give him a few turns on a level and he’ll be able to beat it even if he isn’t perfect

Plays the game during his free time bc he thinks it’s fun

Will beep and aah to the tracks whenever they play

You’ll see him tapping his fingers in the table, and when you ask, he’ll tell you that he’s practicing

Secretly likes playing with the demon brothers bc they’re always so chaotic and entertaining

Considered cosplaying as BF but was to scared to ask Levi to help him

Lastly, here my OC just bc

Aniisha:

Heard about it from a friend in the human world and immediately fell in love

Average at the game but she’s practicing hard

Freestyle dances with Mammon

Like Luke, she will beep and aah whenever she hears a track playing

Loves watching the boys play she loves watching the boys do anything really

Favorite track is Ugh and lowkey simps for Tankman much to Levi’s distress and confusion

She also wants to wear the milf outfit but won’t agree to Diavolo and Solomon’s request unless they call her Mommy

[crowsent]

tales from the smp: the village that went mad ft. salt losing his goddamn mind

“im jack. and. im a farm person, and i like p o t a t o e s”

starting the stream well i see. ponk coming in with generic potato boy and i love him for it

=

QUACKITY

QUACKITY

“my name is helga, wife of badboyhalo” QUACKITY

=

karl: “bad, explain your character other than person that beats up their wife”

bad, immediately: “well, i do declare that my name is jimmy and im the mayor of this town”

and then bbh just fucking starts spinning around when hes asked what the name of this town is, theres a pause, and then he fucking hits us with “not a very good town, town” like BAD

this is why i love this man

this is why i fux with this man

he is unparalleled

=

but as much as i love bbh and would literally murder god for him, he still canNOT match the quiet theatricality of mr corpsehusband saying “im gonna turn around and itll all make sense” and then he has a fucking CAT TAIL

corpse “choke me like you hate me” husband is a fucking CATBOY ladies and gentlemen

hes a fucking catboy which further proves something which we already knew was true all along: furries exist in minecraft and are, in fact, accepted in society and treated no less differently than humans

this is why fundy and antfrost can just walk around without anyone telling them shit

this is why wilbur can fuck a salmon

corpse “catboi” husband paved the fucking road and drove down in a custom vintage jaguar so every other furry on the smp could fucking drive behind him in a second hand porsche

i salute you mr corpsehusband

truly amazing

=

miles memeington, connoisseur of steak and bob, “bob the builder” need no explanation

=

CORNELIUS COMING IN WITH THE BRIGHTASS NEON GREEN BODYSUIT EVERYBODY

GIVE IT UP FOR CORNELIUS

BEST RPER ON THE ENTIRE SMP

CORNELIUS GREENBODYSUIT EVERYONE

=

tubbo with the very cute ‘i am robin, i am an orphan child” being IMMEDIATELY ruined by karl sayin

“dont let technoblade hear about that”

i love this already

i love this already

feed me technoblade lore. the man never fucking uploads so i have to get content adjacent to him

i wanna hear about technoblade the orphan killer. i want that backstory lore

and also i wanna protect robin the orphan boy because hello???????????

that skin???????

let me adopt you mr orphan boy

=

i love quackity just very casually going “my husband and i had intercourse” at the fucking TOWN MEETING BY THE WELL

truly

quackity’s comedy is unmatched

“hes into lots of weird stuff. he taught me this one thing called dunderhead”

and IMMEDIATELY someone (cant tell who, i have auditory processin issues) fucking goes “i DO NOT know this woman” and tbh if i were in that fucking town hall listening to my fucking weirdass neighbour casually lay out all her family secrets, id fucking say that shit too. id fucking disown this bitch as my neighbour. id fucking pretend she doesnt exist

like

imagine your fucking next door neighbour siddling up to you in the fucking w*lmart while youre just minding your own goddamn business trying to buy a fucking banana and your next door neighbour helga is dressed in a fucking bikini going “my husband fucked me so hard i couldnt walk” and even though you are clearly not interested and trying desperately to get away from her and her wackass gossip, helga goes ahead and fucking LISTS OUT HER HUSBANDS KINKS IN THE FUCKING FRUIT AISLE AT FULL VOLUME

id die

id just fucking die

id uninstall life right then and there

id pack my fucking bags and take a fucking extended vacation to guatemala and never return. id fucking change my goddamn name just to ensure that people never associate me with this woman.

thats what quackity is doing and i am very thankful this man exists and has given us the treasure that is helga

=

cOuLd iT Be iN ThE nAMe oF SaTaN???????? 🤔

karl

bruh

bustin out the fucking OLD conspiracies huh

“or could it be in the name of content on karls stream”

and hes just casually breaking the 4th wall too huh

kinda stealing techno “ill read donations in the middle of rp bc i need a distraction” blade’s go-to method there huh

its fucking funny tho. hes narrating this all serious-like but then he just goes “content on my stream uwu” and unrepentantly shatters that suspension of disbelief (in a good way)

but it wouldnt even matter bc apparently, satan and karls content have no difference

=

does protection exist in the smp? im worried for helgas health

the woman visited 3 different fucking houses in one night

=

i love how the rp just stops dead in its tracks around the campfire

no one was using any of the names

corpse was out here calling everyone by their actual names and not the names of their characters

=

this might just be bc im a pathological liar whos seen and heard shit but

i love him but

i mean

bbh cant lie

the man cannot lie

his voice is off, pitch wrong, tone sus

he is deffo a murderer

being accused of something hes not would make a person defensive/angry and bbh is not either

the man is LYING

and his argument/defense was LITERALLY tubbos

man cant lie

send this murderer to hell

=

tubbo can lie, but imo hes not. his voice is the voice of a person whos telling the truth

man is legit the doctor

a doctor who chose to fucking lay on the LORE

father killed in the red-eyed village wars????? mother taken from a young age?

motherfucker brought the LORE

motherfucker brought the SOB STORY

motherfucker legit said “here is my canonical in-character reason for being a doctor fuck you”

and honestly

what is bads defense?

karl asked if the town should kill an orphan over a mayor and there is legit no right answer to that

there is no good rebuttal

so bad straight went “you make a great point. just execute me”

amazing

10/10

=

idk who said it but “orphans just suck up resources” whoever you are i love you

i was eating my chips in peace but then i almost choked

thank

=

I FUCKING KNEW TUBBO WASNT THE MURDERER

his voice did not match

=

my bets on fucking ponk

=

its fucking DREAM

DREAM MURDERER

my respect for this man

motherfucker

shouldve known

he was kinda quiet at first but then he suddenly started talking a lot

son of a BITCH

gg dream

=

round 1 wasnt very rp heavy but

i can excuse that

=

who in the FUCK is making choking donald duck noises

who

bbh got a new skin cool

WHO IS MAKING THE CHOKING DONALD DUCK NOISES

=

corpse, about dreams death: “they killed him in front of me”

the town: “who was it corpse?”

ladies and gentlemen corpse, without a moments hesitation: “im also blind”

=

so the murderer is deffo not corpse. deffo not tubbo. probably not lazarbeam probably not bbh

that leaves quackity, george, and ponk

=

MY PARTNER WAS KILLED

MY PARTNER WAS KILLED

i knew corpse was a catboi but i didnt know that mr dream “i went on a date and almost married a fox” wastaken partnered with a fucking catboy

what is this

dnf is out, dream corpse is in /j

bruh

MY PARTNER WAS KILLED

bro

the tragedy

=

CALM DOWN WENCH THE BOY DID NOTHIGN

CORPSE

CORPSE

STOP

CORPSE

standing up for tubbo like that

corpse

please

my heart cannot handle this

=

okay so its deffo not corpse and tubbo. most likely not quackity after that fucking disaster at the campfire. probably not lazarbeam or bbh. still think its george and ponk

=

CORPSE

he got executed trying to console tubbo who legit WENT IN THE PRISON TRYING TO LOOK FOR HIM

BRUH

WHAT THE FUCK

=

TUBBO

no

TUBBO

technically its robin but

TUBBO

he lost his father so quick what the FUCK

i will murder god for robin

the little shaking head he does after corpse got killed. going completely silent as he lost the one family he had left.

bruh

robin bby no

=

I KNEW HE WASNT THE MURDERER

tubbo

im sorry

=

I KNEW IT WAS PONK

was wrong about lazarbeam/george tho

=

bruh

what the fuck

tubbo/robin honey i am so so sorry

catboi corpse i am so so sorry

[sunshinejins]

if i was dying on my knees (you’d be the one to rescue me)

(title from brother by kodaline)

so, hi!  jatp has reignited my desire to write again and this time i think i might actually finish a whole fic.  so uh, here it is :) please let me know if you like it, I’ll hopefully update asap, but i’m in uni so asap may be in like two weeks.  unless people really like it.  then, probably sooner lmao.

pairing: julie molina x luke patterson

fandom: julie and the phantoms

warnings: death bc rose, and i swear once but other than that i think nothing else?

Julie didn’t want to be frustrated, she really didn’t.  In fact, she wanted to be sad, mourning, depressed, or literally anything other than slightly pissed off all the time.  It’s incredibly exhausting to be angry all the time, and she felt like being sad would at least give her blood a break from simmering.

But her mom died.  And apparently her body only knows how to process grief by developing a rather annoying tendency to be irritated constantly.

She tries to forget it though.  Instead of wallowing in the negative feelings that cloud her family in the months following Rose Molina’s death, she throws herself into distractions.  She gets a job at a coffee shop near the USC campus and puts almost all her effort into becoming a top employee.  Her grades don’t drop because thankfully her professors seemed to all inherently understand that she just couldn’t sing anymore.  Like at all.

The world kept spinning.  Julie could only hope to hold on.

That’s how she ended up, six months later, complaining over a milk frother about her very well-intentioned best friend to the only person she knew would listen.

“Flynn just doesn’t understand,” Julie moans, shutting off the machine and dumping the contents unceremoniously into a to-go cup.  Her coworker, Allison, raises an eyebrow and swipes a rag at the milk spill that pools under the cup.

“Did she try to get you to sing again?”

“Surprise karaoke night with her girlfriend and a couple kids from class.  Her intentions were pure though so I don’t even know why I’m upset.” Julie shoves a lid onto the cup and slides it across the counter to a pre-occupied businessman who doesn’t notice the extra milk soaked into the bottom.  Allison nods thoughtfully and starts dumping coffee beans into the espresso machine.  Julie watches her with slight awe.  Allison was one of those people that terrified Julie when she met her; everything about her felt polished and put together down to the blunt cut of her pale blonde hair and the curve of her smirk when she smiled.  Soon enough, Julie discovered that she was as warm as any of her other friends, but it had taken a lot of closing shifts and smoothie runs to come to that conclusion.

Allison sets down the bag of coffee beans and gives Julie one of her solemn looks; it’s the sort of look where Julie thinks Allison could probably read her mind if she tried hard enough.

“Maybe they’re going about it wrong.  You haven’t been around music properly in what?  A year?  What if you just need to sit and listen to music again to just get you used to the environment?” Julie thinks for a moment.  Allison raises a fair point, and it’s the complete opposite tactic that everyone else has been trying, which has been to shove music in front of her to sing and give her expectant and hopeful looks. It’s a trial run.  Something casual.

“Where would I go?” Allison smiles a bit and passes Julie a container of oat milk to put away.

“There’s a bar off Sunset that’s hosting an open mic tonight.  Very relaxed and casual vibes.  I could pick you up from your apartment and take you.  We haven’t hung out since that movie night a while ago.”  Julie hesitates.  It’s not that she’s opposed to spending a night with Allison, but a small part of her feels like she’s cheating on her current circle of emotional support humans by agreeing to go. Not that her dad or Carlos or Tia would mind, but Flynn would possibly take offence and that alone stalled Julie for longer than she realized. Allison clocks the look on her face and amends the statement.

“Flynn is obviously welcome too.”

A mind reader, Julie swears. 

“Hell yeah. Let’s do this.”

***

Julie’s feeling significantly less optimistic when Allison’s car has been driven away by the valet and herself, Flynn, and Allison are all standing in line outside the club. Julie can feel the bass of the songs playing more than she can hear them, but the proximity of music is enough to make her palms sweat. Other than the music the coffee shop plays and the strains of country she hears through Carlos’ wall, Julie hasn’t heard proper music since Tia Victoria sang “Amazing Grace” for her mother’s funeral. Flynn notices her nervous look. 

“Chill, Jules. It’s all very chill. We’re just gonna listen to a couple bands.” 

“Flynn’s right. And if at any point you want to bail, we can go get soft pretzels.” 

“But we should try and stay for the whole thing!”

“However, we’re also going to respect you if you can’t do that,” Allison punctuates this sentence with a meaningful eyebrow raise and Flynn nods vigorously. Julie swallows and tries to mimic the courage she had a few hours ago.  The bartender scrutinizes their IDs for a moment before allowing them to sweep into the bar and Julie’s jaw nearly drops at the volume of people contained inside.  Nearly every seat is filled, and the standing areas are packed with people all jamming to the band onstage that’s currently playing what Julie has to admit is a pretty kick ass cover of “Somebody Told Me” by The Killers.  

Allison somehow discovers a table near the edge of the bar, and disappears off to get them drinks.  Flynn’s rocking out already, and Julie feels a few of the nerves in her stomach even out as the realization that she doesn’t have to sing sinks into her bones.  Allison was right, unsurprisingly.  If she focuses hard enough, she can even push out the memories of coming to these sorts of open nights with her mom.  Flynn shoots her a large and grateful grin and Julie lets herself smile back.  She’s taking a step.  She’s doing it.

Allison returns as the band switches and a new band begins to play a hyped up cover of “Africa” by Toto.  The three girls lapse into quiet appreciation of the music, with Flynn singing along to every song played, Allison bobbing her head to herself and occasionally letting out a few notes in her vocal range, and Julie just quietly appreciating the fact that she doesn’t feel like throwing up.

It’s all very casual, just like her friends said.

Until it’s not.

As the third band of the night begins their last song, Julie retreats to find the bathroom.  It’s hidden nearly backstage, and she’s just about to make it to the door when she hears the panicked shouts of someone from near the curtain which separates the small backstage from the actual performing area.

“Dude, I cannot believe he bailed on us.”

“Are you really surprised?  Bobby was a piece of shit.”

“Hey, he didn’t use to be!”

“Calm down, Reg.  You know he’s been treating us like garbage ever since that record label thought he had a ‘marketable voice’ or whatever they said.”

“Guys he bailed on us, what are we supposed to do?”

Julie, despite all the “stranger danger” lessons running through her brain, backed up far enough to see into the backstage area.  Three guys stood there, two with a guitar and a bass each and one with drumsticks he was nervously twirling.  The one with the guitar had his face buried in his hands and kept swearing heavily under his breath.  The other two seemed frozen in their own panic as well.  Guitar Player removed his hands from his face and Julie caught a glimpse of worried hazel eyes and dark curls.  Bass Player opened his arms and Guitar Player tumbled into them for a hug while Drum Player rubbed his back.  The three guys looked absolutely wrecked.

Here’s the thing: Julie had an uncontrollable urge to help people.  It’s how she got roped into half of Flynn’s schemes, how she ended up teaching Carlos all of his second grade science curriculum herself, and how she somehow became the unofficial backbone of her family after her mom died.  Seeing three guys utterly wrecked because, presumably, their fourth bandmate had bailed on them?  It activated that uncontrollable urge deep in her stomach.

Here’s another thing: Julie hasn’t played music or sang in six months.  She’s had no desire to, and every time she’s tried, the distinct urge to throw up overtook her.  Tonight was supposed to be the baby step that showed her whether or not music was something she could seriously consider again; whether or not she could feel that itch to perform anymore.

“Hey, do you guys need a fourth?”

She felt the itch.  

The three guys looked up in varying levels of shock.  Drum Player recovered first, and stepped towards her hesitantly, wringing his pink hoodie as he did.

“Um, what?”

“It sounded like someone bailed on you.  I can play.  If you need it.”  Guitar Player recovers next and nearly bounds over to her in barely contained excitement.

“You can play rhythm guitar?”

“No,” the three boys deflate, “I can play piano though.”  Guitar Player tilts his head to the side as though playing a melody through in his head.  He turns back to the other two.

“Bright could fit piano.”

“We never wrote the music for a piano component,” Drum Player wrinkles his nose.

“I did,” Guitar Player admits.  The other two don’t look phased, though Bass Player does raise an eyebrow.  “I was bored!”

“Okay, but we don’t want to put you out,” Drum Player turns back to Julie and she swallows.  

“No, I offered.  Let me see the music.”

“Okay, but you have like ten minutes!” Bass Player finally chips in with a surprisingly cheerful tone.  Guitar Player hands Julie what looks like a piece of notebook paper and her eyes skim the words and notes.  It’s feasible for sure, but she can feel the nerves prickling at her stomach.  Guitar Player leans into her space and she clocks how ridiculously attractive he is up close.  He gives her a smile.

“We alternative verses like this, see?  And I don’t know your range, but we can figure that out on the go.”  Julie gives him a small smile.

“Somewhere between mezzo-soprano and soprano.”

“We can work with that.” Guitar Player seems to vibrate with energy.  “Are you sure you wanna do this?”

“No pressure,” Bass Player adds.

“Like seriously, none.  We can just go home and cry,” Drum Player says.  Julie isn’t sure.  She really isn’t.  In fact, she’s pretty sure she should just run away and hope she never sees these guys again.

“I’m sure.”

Well, that’s that.

Guitar Player sends her a smile that looks genuinely like someone has funnelled sunlight into his body and Julie feels the nerves lift for half a second.  Then, they’re called to the stage and all of a sudden she feels like she could puke all over again.  Guitar Player grabs her hand and squeezes it.

“You got this.”

Julie files out with the rest of the band and she’s extremely grateful her friends aren’t sitting in her direct line of sight.  The piano is definitely worn out from use, but her fingers settle naturally on the keys and Julie tries to focus on the budding itch to perform in her stomach rather than the urge to throw up.  She’s supposed to start this song.  This song that she became aware of ten minutes earlier.  She catches Guitar Player’s eye and he nods encouragingly.

She presses down on the keys and opens her mouth. 

Sometimes I think I'm falling down

I wanna cry, I'm calling out

For one more try to feel alive

And when I feel lost and alone

I know that I can make it home

Fight through the dark and find the spark

[foryouthegays]

techno liveblog w timestamps lets go for ‘a new home (dream SMP)’ stream

good laugh times: 00:13:50, 00:14:55, 1:38:45, ik it doesnt look like a lot but like u should watch the stream anyway bc philzas there and his laugh is amazing and they just go so well together

times techno calls phil his friend: 00:6:00 00:37:00, 00:45:17, 0:1:09:30, 01:11:15, 01:26:35, 01:50:05, 2:35:00

FSDJKFAF;LS HE KEPT THE MUTED INTRO IN JHKADFLS (ends at 00:1:25)

i like how, when faced with Leaving Youtube, techno would choose to be an author. i want a book by techno. reblog this if u want a book by techno (with an audiobook by him as well) /hj. 00:1:33

i love how he says ehhhhhh so much lskjhdfas (abt 2 mins in) 

who the FUCK just remembers that the word fortuitous exists wtf 00:5:17

00:7:45 PHILZA TIME PHILZA TIME LETS GO

00:8:55 tommy time :/

0:14:10 rANBOO JUST WALKS IN, LOOKS AROUN ,AND LEA VE SIM CRYING 

i love how much philza laughs at technos jokes bc pretty much everything he says IS a joke he just says it in such a serious voice that p much everyone else is like,,,yeah,,,,yup,,,,and phil just knows when hes joking and his laugh is so good with technos voice. sbi? whos that? i only know philza and technoblade

00:19:30 ghostbur joins! this is my first time hearin ghostbur btw

00:19:40 haha string axe technos so bad at crafting what a fool /j

00:21:07 ghostbur: “Even I remember how to make a fishing rod!” ghostbur u just MURDERED technoblade oh my god im gonna scream hgjdfksla i love ghostbur so much

00:23:55: GHOSTBUR NO!! DON’T DIE YOU’LL BECOME A DOUBLE GHOST!!!! -technoblade 2020

00:24:55 technoblade neva lies -guys he almost did the technoblade neva dies ahh!!!!!

i havent heard anyone talk about this but techno has a dedicated roleplay voice. like listen to him talk to tommy at 00:25:08. his voice gets more even, he uses names a lot more often (seriously, listen to his theseus speech. he says tommy so often, its incredible.), and his voice gets,,,,deeper? not deeper but smoother, in a way, and he repeats what he says for emphasis instead of humor. and his voice is louder, and he seems more assertive. 

00:27:30 philza: where we goin, by the way? techno: to our- to my new home. 

techno cmon let phil live w u wed get so much more content cmonn

00:28:50 the fact that he calls the manhunt theme “dream music” makes me laugh so hard. and then his version of it,,,,,m love he (also he sings it here and at  01:14:20)

00:35:10 why is ranboo so cryptic im-

why does he just casually know the word sentry wh at i hate him 00:39:45

this is the worst sentence (structurally) ive ever heard techno say im gonna cry 00:49:33 ‘im too busy thinkin of new ideas to sleep so i could actually execute them’ and tubbos *oh?* after is just hdsfgkjlka

LKSJDHFJK 00:51:49

00:54:30

techno: thats one of dreams powers, he can just stop the rain

tubbo, quietly: like jesus!

i love them sm dsfhkjla they kept going but i jus gdfhjksa jesus has op

techno @ being the second worst thing to ever happen to those orphans: haha funnie!!

techno @ having fun w religious stuff: i wILL BE CANCELLED NO-

00:58:10 “hey if ur [ghostbur]  a ghost, do instant damage potions heal you now?” “...no,, they hurt me still :(” DSIULZKJHFSLKFJH 

01:04:00 his brother named the cow bob im- aww 

also he has a fanart wall again!!!

01:09:30 “phil, you’re the only friend i have left in this world.” aWWWWW HE GAVE HIM THE COMPASS 

“dont smoke, it’s a joke” -technoblade 01:14:15

ROLEPLAY SPEECH VOICE IS BACK AT 1:16:10 “they pillage my base for everything i’m worth, they use me for the revolution, but oooOOOoo i took a pickaxe with his consent? oOOOooOo i’m a thief!”

holy shit 01:17:15 “you know what, phil? for you, the world, alright? it’s fine.” oH MY GOD HHHHGHG (context, right before they were arguing bc phil took some blocks from his base and techno thought that when he said phil could take anything he meant from the chests)

the COMIDY of that villager coming in and sleeping while techno was readin donos at 01:22:05 RIGHT AFTER phil freaked out abt inturruptin his dono readin im SFDHKJLA:

techno talkin bout the winstreak and how he wont be able to live up to that sort of playin at 01:22:30ish is super important and ill transcribe it tomorrow, but if u can id highly rec watchin it. 

01:24:20 “[readin dono] what’s your favorite movie? uh, the princess bride is pretty good” techno ily that movie rocks also he said it so fast like hes ashamed of it noo

techno says no to canon ranboo son btw! 01:25:30

01:25:55 “i wasnt in that story, therefore it doesnt matter” all of technoblr be like 

01:37:49 is great lemmie transcribe

“how have you still not gotten a second monitor?? holy shit.”

“let me tell you something. and im only telling you this because i know that so many people in the chat are gonna be furious. so i recently realized- i think the second monitor can just be any ol’ monitor, right? you literally just plug it in, and its set up? well i mean you have to turn on some settings, but like, thats it, or something?”

“yeah,,,,, uh techno you fuckin destroyed my chat, by the way, oh my god, [earlier techno told his viewers to twitch prime philza] there has been like 40 primes just flying through”

“yeahhh twitch prime!!! twitch prime philza yeahh!!! so anyways the other day, i like, i looked to my left, and realized that my old monitor has been like, five feet away from where i sit and stream for the last three years?”

“oh my god...”

“so i- i literally do not have to leave my room to set up a second monitor and i havent. and i’m still usin my laptop for this stream.

“is this gonna be one of those situations where you like, you have a thing, you just refuse to do the thing?”

“listen, my desk is-

“yOU STILL HAVENT OPENED UP THE HYPIXEL PACKAGE!!!”

“AHHHH I HAVENT OPENED UP THE HYPIXEL PACKAGE! I HAVENT EVEN OPENED UP MY MCC COIN! DUDE I HAVENT EVEN OPENED UP MY ONE MILLION SUBSCRIBER PLAQUE! ITS STILL THERE RIGHT BEHIND ME! ITs sTILL IN THE BOX! i never made a video on it....”

“bruhhhhh [philza laughs] thats FREE VIEWS what are you doing??”

“ill open it at 8 mil :/.”

“you could LITERALLY make a video of you just like, throwing it off a wall, and then thumbing up, like doing a thumbs up, and then that would be it. 10 seconds. ten seconds. thumb and elbow in shot. [laughs]”

techno is such a disaster i love him

01:34:18 the way techno says “tommy, that statement has NEVER been true” i dont like sayin i simp for block men but GOD sometimes his voice is nicer than usual hhhgn

“man i sure wish tommyinnit was in this stream” -nobody ever (just after previous timestamp)

01:40:15 is fuckin hilarious and im actually crying oh my god techno just says things and says them well with a completely straight face how does he do it

i cannot WAIT until theres a president w the last/first name andy so we can say president andy and think abt technoblade

IM CRIASDNGUSFHD 01:44:38 PHILZA LOOK OUT LOOK OUT PHILZA  LSKJDAFJASD;LKF

i love when techno talks abt his vids. like u can tell he puts a lot of thought into the vids (esp these ones) and like at 01:47:00 he talks abt the “I DIDNT PUT DEAPTH STRIDER ON THOSE BOOTS, FUNDY!” and how its just that creepin realization that you were doomed from the start and how he made the armor, he isnt intimidated by the netherite bc he didnt enchant it all the way and only he knows that,,, and i just,,,hgg he

he reveals that hes writin the next arc at 01:48:00: “oh, speakin of arcs, chat, i’m writing the next arc. so, you know. hope nothin bad happens in two weeks, chat!” IM SO EXCITED like he clearly has his character fleshed out and is SO good at writing and retellin history im so so excited to see where he takes it AHHHH and also taht means he might stream more bc he might make his character more important (keep in mind this is the guy who wrote self insert hypixel fanfics. he has no shame in puttin himself first and i respect him so much for it) 

01:51:20 “they’re tryin to get a second customer but they’re riskin their first” is lowkey a good line

has anyone else noticed that techno says wise a lot? like at 01:55:10 he literally says “wise dragon armor” as a joke but like i think he says wise so much BECAUSE of skyblock like hjkfdsla

01:57:30 techno plea se eat 

ok 1:58:45 is hilarious and all but at the end of his ramble he says “come back, i miss you” and lowkey im crying 

techno needs to stop knowing his audience more than we know ourselves im hsfkjda 02:05:25 “the chat’s spammin ‘eat technoblade, eat!’ like they’re not gonna start, like, theyre not gonna get super sad if i ended the stream right now, like theyre not gonna all cry ‘i miss technoblade *sniffs* why- whyd he leave to eat food, why did he listen to our advice noooo’”

02:14:50 NEW VIDEO POGGGG CARL THE HORSE POGGGGGG  NOT A STREAM HIGHLIGHT POGGGGG

02:17:40 “i could start a potato farm out here to show how much ive changed” techno last time u made a potato farm u started an entire war that lasted a year that does NOT say calm and retired to me lskgdfjagsldj

02:23:00 why does techno just reference greek mythology so much. makin me scared for his arc. 

also he talks abt smp earth a lot in this stream i love it so much

i also just. love?? how much sbi respect tommy like they bully him but when talkin bout him they just have so much respect for how much work he puts into youtube and i just,,,,hgnn they r friends 

02:33:13 sbi streamer house lets go cmon

02:34:15 “i think if i streamed every day i could keep up” on one hand YE S  but on the ohter oh god techno no we have to keep up tho

hearing techno say “violence isnt the answer” is so scary  02:35:40

02:37:30 technosneeze 

hiS BROTHER SENT HIM 46 DISCORD MESSAGES SFKDJLFLKASF 2:49:25 i love his end screen so much hes just sadness,,,,retirement,,,t,echnoblade,,,the government is going to fall on its own due to lack of organization and ideals,,,,,,subscribe,,,,,sadness,,,,,also 2:50:45 is making me laugh so hard its just sad music and technos like??? whys phil in my house drinking milk????? 

overall, fantastic stream, if ya want some chill techno philza content i highly recommend. 

[koala-otter]

Hi! This is the main blog for hurricanezukka and thank you for the fic rec and making me aware of your amazing writing last night! I saw you were taking prompts and was wondering if you could do a cute short fic about my headcanon that Zuko does The Dance™ when he eats food he likes and Sokka seeing it for the first time and having a gay meltdown bc it's too cute for him to handle? Either way thank you for cheering up my night! 🥰

Oh my gosh hi again!! Thank you so much! I’m so happy you liked it! And I hope you’re feeling better :)

I love this headcanon a lot a lot, and I really wanted to do it justice. I hope it’s everything you imagined!

Zuko does The Dance™ when he eats 1.2k words

It’s going to be a long night, Sokka realizes on his way to the Fire Lord’s chamber, and Zuko likely hasn’t eaten, so he asks one of the attendants at the door to bring dinner for the two of them.

“Something easy,” Sokka explains as he strides into the chamber, “that Zuko will definitely like. Maybe komodo chicken?”

He doesn’t think about it again until later, after he’s been ushered through the antechamber into a salon where Zuko sits on the floor in front of a low table. A pile of scrolls lies in front of him, and he keeps looking at the topmost one as he fills another sheet of paper with his carefully practiced characters. Sokka sits across from him and covertly moves the inkstone and stick away from Zuko’s sleeve. 

Zuko looks up at him in alarm. 

“Wow, look at you, it seems like you’ve gotten a lot done already on your own,” Sokka says encouragingly. He grabs the stack of papers on the far side of the table and hefts them meaningfully, raising his eyebrows at Zuko. 

“There’d be more done if you got here earlier,” Zuko says pointedly, though they both know he isn’t actually angry. He avoids the view of Sokka’s contracting biceps he knows is meant to distract him.

“Hey, you asked me to take the meeting with the Hubei governor,” Sokka reminds him. He drops the stack on the floor next to him with a thud reminiscent of a camelephant foot hitting the ground. 

The left side of Zuko’s face quirks up in a grin. “And now that you know him so well, you can be the one to respond to his letter,” he says. He hands Sokka his own sheet of paper and one of the scrolls.

“You’re joking,” Sokka says. He unfurls the scroll. “He sent one, too?”

“Everyone’s sending congratulations, Sokka,” Zuko says, borderline impatiently. “There’ve been hawks coming every hour since your dad made the announcement.”

Sokka sighs. “I guess this is what I get for being engaged to the Fire Lord.” Sokka hears a huff and looks up to find Zuko with his one eyebrow raised, unimpressed. Sokka breaks into a toothy grin. “Not that it isn’t absolutely, completely worth it.”

Zuko lowers his face back down toward his paper in an attempt to hide the small smile on his face, and Sokka looks smug as he picks up his own brush and starts writing. 

Only a little while later, the double doors open, and a litter of servants enter the salon bearing several trays. Zuko stares, his mouth agape, as an attendant sets a soban table next to the two men, and the rest of the litter begin laying dishes on its surface. There is not only komodo chicken, but also squirrel-fried fish, sticky rice and komodo rhino sausage wrapped in lotus leaf, fresh green cucumber with garlic and red chilies, hippo-beef dumplings, and even Zuko’s favorite Earth Kingdom delicacy, fried dough filled with sweet red bean paste. One last servant presents them with a bowl of elaborately sliced mangoes, bananas, and cherries, and a pot of jasmine tea, before going to stand with his colleagues.  

“I hope these humble leftovers will be to your liking—” The senior attendant pauses; Sokka’s term of address is still a little ambiguous, especially in light of his recent engagement to the Fire Lord. Does one still consider him an ambassador, or is his status now that of a royal? “Sir,” the attendant finally settles on.

Zuko finally regains his ability to speak. “What is all of this?” he asks. He stares at the spread in a daze. 

“It’s for you,” Sokka says kindly before turning to address the attendants. “This is great! Thank you.”

The attendants bow and leave the room, closing the doors quietly behind them. Sokka resumes his writing. Zuko still stares at the food. 

“Why?” he finally asks. 

“I figured you needed to eat,” Sokka says simply. He gestures to the dishes with the back of his brush. “You should start.” He grins cheekily. “I’ve still got a lot of catching up to do on my letters.”

“You do,” Zuko agrees, and he considers waiting for Sokka to join him, or insisting he start eating first. But the fragrance of the rice calls a little louder, and Zuko picks up his chopsticks and eagerly analyzes the dishes before him for his first bite. 

For a while, all Sokka hears while he writes his replies is the stroke of his brush on paper and the sound of Zuko’s chopsticks occasionally tapping together. But then there is something else, something he’s never heard before and that he cannot place, like a rustling of fabric, but not quite as loud and more regular. and Sokka raises his head slowly out of curiosity. 

Zuko looks sleepy, as he normally does when he stays up this late, with half-lidded eyes and a looseness about his shoulders. But he is also smiling. Contentment softens the lines of his face as he chews his food and his chopsticks float above the dishes, preparing for his next selection. Each bite is rewarded with a brief squeezing of his eyes shut, and a little sway, before he resumes a curious motion Sokka doesn’t understand at first glance. Zuko bobs up and down to some silent beat, his head moving in one direction and then another, and his free hand idly moving in tandem with the rest of his body. 

Sokka realizes all at once that Zuko is dancing. 

His mouth drops open slightly and his chest seizes at the sight of his betrothed, one of the fiercest firebenders in the world and the most powerful man of his nation, dancing during his dinner. If he were a crying man, Sokka would be moved to tears, but he’s instead simply, painfully overwhelmed with the desire to sweep Zuko into his arms, or to tie him to the bed, or just cradle him and keep him from the rest of the world. The little movements of his body, the sweet joy of his gaze on the food, the sway of his hair are all too much for Sokka to think about literally anything else, and the scroll slips from his hand and falls to the ground, forgotten.

Zuko stops dancing at the sound and looks up at Sokka, blinking slowly. 

“Sokka?”

Sokka's mouth doesn’t work yet, and he simply gazes at Zuko, pure adoration shining from his eyes. 

Zuko misreads it. 

“What, is there something on my face?” he asks self-consciously. He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, worry furrowing his brow. “It’s not my fault there’s so much sauce on squirrel-fried fish.”

Sokka finally shakes himself out of his reverie, and he smiles lovingly at Zuko. “You’re perfect,” he says earnestly, and he leans across the table to kiss Zuko soundly. He tastes like garlic and chilies and salt. “I really love you.”

Zuko looks a little dazed when Sokka pulls back, and a light blush colors his cheeks. But he looks pleased. “I love you, too,” he says, his voice a little hoarse, and he laughs, short and sweet. He points to the food, barely any less abundant than when he began. “Now will you please eat with me?”

“In a minute,” Sokka replies, picking up the scroll once more, “I just really want to finish this.”

Zuko nods and tucks back into one of the bundles of sticky rice, sighing and dropping his shoulders as he relaxes anew. 

Sokka smiles as he waits patiently for the dancing to start again.

[jowritesthingss]

Excuse Me Sir This Is My Emotional Support Eldritch Being

Fandom: The Magnus Archives

Pairing(s): n/a

Rating: Teen (for swearing)

Content Warning(s): rabbits, food/drink, mild(ish) swearing, not!Sasha, eldritch beings, spoilers through early s3-ish

Length: 2,190 words

Brief Summary: The archival team adopts a rabbit. (Part one of the Emotional Support Eldritch AU!)

AO3 link in reblogs bc Tumblr is a biatch!

*

“What is it?”

Jon levels a suspicious glare down at the fluffy blob comfortably stretched out in the middle of the overstuffed break room couch.

Tim blinks owlishly at him from behind his mug of tea. “A...rabbit?”

“Yes, but are you sure it’s a rabbit?” Jon asks insistently. “Not a—a spirit, or...an animated doll, or a clown in disguise or something?”

Sighing, Tim sets his tea down on the counter. “Look, I get the whole ‘suspicious of us being murderers’ thing—no I don’t, actually, but that’s beside the point—it. is. a rabbit.” For a good measure, he walks over to sit on one side of the rabbit, reaching a hand out to the little guy’s fluffy head. If a rabbit could smile, he suspects this one would be doing so as it leans up into his hand.

“No fleas or ticks...or worms, so it’s not some Jane Prentiss Pet Sematary crossover, I promise—” Tim rolls his eyes, “—the veterinarian confirmed as much when I brought the poor thing in. Out of the mud and the rain of the gutter,” he adds, not even attempting to hide the guilt-trip. He wishes Martin were here, with his ridiculously effective puppy-dog eyes.

Tim knows this is Jon he’s talking to, but surely even he can’t be that cold-hearted. He rather thinks that Jon will enjoy not being alone anymore down here during all his late nights. If he’d let himself, surely Jon would enjoy having company in the form of a teeny tiny creature that can’t and won’t harm him—which, uh, certainly is not why he’s lying about his current flat not permitting pets, no siree.

“...Fine. Whatever.” Jon points an accusing finger at him. “But we’re not keeping it,” he stresses. “The moment you find it a different home, it goes. The moment.”

“Sure thing, boss,” Tim chirps, although as he begins a staring contest with the rabbit’s curious red eyes, he has no intention of actually doing as Jon says.

Martin chooses this moment to walk through the door. His eyes light up. “Aw, is that a rabbit?”

“No, this does not mean you’re allowed to bring in more strays,” Jon snaps.

The light in Martin’s eyes fades. “Okay,” he says mournfully as he crouches to pet the rabbit, sulking.

-

“So what should we name him?” Tim asks Jon when the Head Archivist comes into the break room the next morning.

“Oh—my—” Jon startles where he stands by the counter, attempting to make himself some toast with the Archive’s horrible fifteen-year-old toaster—toast that now splatters across the floor. Somehow in his sleep-deprived stupor he must’ve missed Tim sitting on the couch with a white rabbit on his head. He never seems to really notice Tim, but at this point it’s fine enough; Tim has accepted that the guy has impossibly poor taste.

The rabbit clambers down from Tim’s shoulders, jumping off of the couch and padding over to investigate the new human(?) and the mess he made.

“How about Thumper?” Tim puzzles aloud, stretching leisurely and acting as if he doesn’t notice Jon frantically scrubbing up raspberry jam and trying to avoid the rabbit’s investigative snuffles all in one. “No, no...that’s too cliché.”

“I really don’t see the point in naming it when it shouldn’t be here more than a few weeks,” Jon comments, shooing the animal in question away before it can try to lick up any jam.

“Maybe Joe?” Tim continues loudly, as if he hadn’t heard the other. When the rabbit ambles back over to him, he scoops them up, pressing their noses together. “Ligma?” He shakes his head at the rabbit. “No, no. We need to have more sophistication as we go about this.”

“You could do with applying that sophistication to your work,” comes the grumbled retort.

“What?”

“Nothing.” Jon abruptly turns to burn another piece of bread in the toaster.

-

“How about Marshmallow?”

“What on Earth—” Jon shrieks, jumping in his desk chair, and a sheaf of papers is sent flying around the office.

“The rabbit. Should we call him ‘Marshmallow’?” Tim smiles as innocently as he can manage, standing out in the hall with his head peeping into his boss’ office. “Marshie for short?”

“I am in the middle of a statement!” Jon sputters. “Get out!”

“Okay, okay....” Tim fluidly shrugs his shoulders. “What about ‘Bob’?”

“Out!”

But Tim continues to pop into Jon’s office unannounced throughout the day, tossing out name suggestions. He even manages to rope Martin into doing it too, and notes with savage delight that between the two of them and his work, Jon doesn’t get much more than a moment to wallow rest for the remainder of the day.

Between the two of them Tim and Martin manage to compile a surprisingly long list of names:

Snowball,

Posy (Martin is partial to this one because he thinks it’s cute),

Bungen Leitner,

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt (“is that too American of a reference for a fanfic taking place in the UK?” “what?” “what?”),

the Bunholding,

Michael (Jon is especially averse to that one for some reason),

Cottonball,

Fluffy Bastard (Tim’s own favorite),

Bugs Bunny,

Eldritch Horror (Tim tosses that one in as a joke; no way the rabbit that eats his own shit is some kind of otherworldly being),

Big Bungus (“it’s a play off Big Chungus!” “d’you seriously think anyone else here even knows what memes are”), and

the Vampiric Count Sir Maximillianus-Who-Is-Also-A-Werebun

(Despite badgering Sasha multiple times in an attempt to get her thoughts on the matter, the only name she offers up is “Dinner”, which makes Martin cry, so that one is out.)

None of the names quite seem to fit the little white puffball that has now taken over the realm of their break room, however—so Tim and Martin find themselves going back to the drawing board. They reluctantly leave the Institute at the end of the day, still without having decided upon a name.

-

“JON JUNIOR!” Martin screeches excitedly the next morning as they’re congregating once more in the break room, zombie-like before their tea and mid-morning snack time (primary schools don’t get all the fun, okay).

Jon and Sasha startle, and for once even Tim himself jumps. The rabbit doesn’t seem to care much where he is, nibbling at some hay in his corner litter box.

“I—what?” Jon asks, flabbergasted, although he manages to not drop his toast this time. Character development.

“We should name him Jon Jr! After you!” Martin explains eagerly.

“Absolutely not,” Jon tries to say, but before he can finish, Tim is jumping in.

“I think that is an excellent idea,” he says, grinning broadly. “Thoughts, Sasha?”

“I’m not emotionally invested in this.” Sasha shrugs, uncaring. “I’m going back to my desk.” She takes her drink and walks out of the room, letting the door slam shut behind her.

“All right, since Sasha doesn’t care, I’ll decide her vote for her,” Tim says, carefully containing his glee. “So that’s three votes for and one against, then. Majority rules.”

“What? No!” John protests, but Tim is too busy looking at the rabbit for confirmation.

“What do you think, little guy?” He walks over, bends down, and lightly boops the rabbit’s nose. “Are you a Jon Jr?”

The rabbit twitches his nose in agreement and poops.

“Well then!” Tim stands, clapping his hands together. “That’s been decided upon.”

No, it hasn’t,” Jon insists, but Tim cares little for his boss’ objections. He’ll accept his fate as Jon Senior eventually.

-

To Tim’s utter surprise and fascination, it happens sooner than later.

Jon, Tim quickly realizes, is a lot like the one dad who says “no dog” and then ends up loving the dog more than he loves his own children.

Despite his initial objections, the daft fool ends up getting caught up in Jon Jr’s big, innocent, rabbit-y gaze (worse than even Martin’s puppy-dog eyes, they conclude gravely), and by the end of the day Friday Jon has announced that he supposes the rabbit can stay with him over weekends and holidays.

“We���re still not keeping him,” Jon reminds them all, even as the rabbit gathered in his arms, giving his nose kisses and knocking his glasses askew, says otherwise.

He gets caught trying to sneak the rabbit into his office on more than one occasion, but Martin raises a fuss about it.

(“He’s all of ours! Jon Jr is our department’s mascot now,” Martin protests defiantly. “You can’t take him away from the rest of us.”

“Yeah,” Tim adds, mostly just to stir up drama—he doesn’t particularly care one way or another. “You can’t just swoop him up and file him away like one of your statements.”

“Just don’t let it get out and chew at my electronics,” Sasha says, distractedly typing something on her phone, probably to that weird new boyfriend.)

To stave off the imminent coup, Jon Jr becomes an officially-declared resident of the break room. He slowly amasses chub around his middle and a cardboard kingdom of bunny toys, houses, blankets, and treats. A rabbit could want for nothing more.

And perhaps—perhaps a human could want for nothing more, too, Tim thinks as he looks down at the figure curled up on the sofa, rabbit nestled against his chest.

He doesn’t love the man, not by a long, long shot—doesn’t even particularly like him half the time—but Tim can’t deny that the scene is adorable. And, regardless of his very vocal protests, Jon Jr may very well be what Jon Sr needs to finally process things and move the hell on with life.

Tim smiles grimly. It’s about damn time.

He quietly closes the door to the room and heads back towards the Archives. He’ll leave Jon to wake himself up.

(And to discover for himself that Jon Jr has peed on his pants leg.)

-

Of course, this is the Archive we’re talking about, so naturally the peace is abruptly shattered, and everything goes horribly, horribly wrong.

Tim isn’t entirely certain what happens or why, but all of a sudden Sasha isn’t really Sasha, and he and Jon have gotten backed up and cornered in the tunnels as this not-really-Sasha stalks towards them, predictably with the intent to kill, just like the rest of the spooks they are so lucky to deal with.

Tim and Jon Sr slowly back away until they hit a dead end. Meanwhile, Jon Jr licks at Tim’s arm—he’d been scooped up as they ran into the tunnels, Tim doesn’t entirely know why—and despite the fact that they are most probably about to, y’know, die, the little kisses almost feel strangely reassuring.

The thing-that-is-not-Sasha cackles, her—their?—its?—voice distorted and echoing throughout the tunnels. It stalks towards them.

All of a sudden, Jon Jr wriggles loose and leaps smoothly down onto the ground. He scampers in front of Tim and Jon, heading towards bitch-give-me-my-Sasha-back.

“No! Get back here!” Tim hisses at the rabbit, even though he knows it’s pointless. He hates to admit it, but he’s becoming rather fond of Jon Jr, even if Tim mostly brought him in to piss off and totally not help Jon. Jon—who, speaking of, seems to be equally fond now, judging by the deflating tire of a terrified squeak he makes, and the adorable immature grabby arms he makes at the little bugger.

“Junior,” Jon calls out, sounding like a toddler who’d just been told Santa wasn’t real (he is, they have the statements to prove it, he is). And Tim wants to laugh, albeit hysterically. The first time he sees his brick wall of a superior cry and it’s over a rabbit, and he’s not even going to have time to gloat over it because they’re about to die. “No! You’re going to—”

Jon Jr stops and sits in front of wholly-absolutely-totally-not-Sasha-what-the-fuck, who looks down at him, bemused through its murderous bloodlust.

The rabbit lifts a dainty paw up to his mouth, and suddenly—suddenly it’s twisting and huge, towering up to the ceiling of the tunnel, its skin hairless and tinted a sickly, glowing gray, with five, six, seven...a whole lot more limbs than a rabbit is supposed to have.

The not-rabbit unhinges its now meters-long jaw and snaps up the creature.

Tim and Jon stare at each other, wide-eyed.

There is a loud gulping sound, then a deafening crack, and suddenly there is a very normal white rabbit sitting in front of them again, carefully cleaning one paw with a very normal pink tongue.

“Wh—” Tim chokes on his own words.

The holy-shit-it-really-is-an-eldritch-horror-after-all stretches, yawns, and flops over in a dead sleep.

“...We’re keeping the rabbit,” Jon says faintly.

“I—yeah.” Tim nods, light-headed. “We’re keeping the rabbit.”

-

Jon Jr the rabbit-slash-eldritch-abomination gets a very hearty dinner of romaine lettuce, tomatoes, and cucumber peels that night.

-

(Tune in next time* for the terrible, terrible realization—“Jon Jr is a girl?!” (Also why is there another dead body again, dammit, can’t we go one week))

Fin

First || Next

*

(There may or may not actually be a next time. It depends. )

Behold. What very well may be the stupidest thing I have ever written. Ahem. Did I say stupidest? I meant most brilliant. Clearly I meant it’s the most brilliant thing I have ever written. Obviously.

Let me know if you enjoyed this! I have a bunch of ideas to continue this ridiculously silly AU of sorts, but idk if I’m going to quite yet and am not certain that I’ll be continuing to write for TMA. atm I’m focused on a different fandom, and I’m only on s3, so the really big idea I had has to wait, anyway.

Want to chat or be added onto any of my taglists? Shoot me an ask or a message here or via my other social media!

[musicaltheatrewannabe]

snow - a seblos oneshot <3

hope yall had a merry christmas - i am back with another seblos fic bc i cant get enough of them, so here we have them as boyfriends building a snowman and cute shenanigans ensue, enjoy!

Carlos put his feet up on the couch and yawned. It was the morning of December 26th and all of the Christmas excitement in his house from the day before had worn off, leaving his family scattered around doing nothing. For one thing, it wasn’t snowing anymore, and the non-stop snowfall of the day before had made it a magical white Christmas. Carlos got out his phone and scrolled mindlessly through the multitude of Christmas - and the handful of Hanukkah - posts on Instagram, smiling at all of his friends’ pictures. He was so glad that the production of High School Musical that semester had given him not only the opportunity to work as a choreographer, but also his first real group of friends. And then there was Seb, his boyfriend. Carlos smiled at the thought of the blonde musical theatre farmboy. He was still getting used to them being boyfriends, but with every day that they spent together it sunk in a little more. Carlos navigated back to Seb’s account and was looking at his family Christmas post just a little longer when he received a text from him: hey babe! happy boxing day lol:)

Carlos felt his heart flutter at being called “babe” and replied: happy boxing day to you too! you doing anything interesting to celebrate? ahaha.

Seb’s reply came immediately: not really - everyone has kind of disappeared to their own corners of the house…

Carlos stretched his back and sat up a bit on the couch before replying: honestly same, idk how my house went from the chaos it was last night to being completely deserted.

Seb wrote back again: well, if you’re not doing anything, do you wanna come over? the snow is so pretty here on the farm!

Carlos already started getting off the couch as he typed out his reply: yes pls, ok ill be there soon!

Soon enough Carlos had put on a scarf, hat and gloves, and had gotten one of his older cousins to drive him to Seb’s farm. He rang the doorbell eagerly, filled with the nervous energy that he got every time he saw Seb. Carlos heard footsteps thundering down the stairs and smiled at the fact that Seb was running to get the door. A few moments later, it swung open to reveal Seb grinning out at Carlos. “Hi!” he said, and leaned in to give Carlos a peck.

Carlos blushed at the kiss and said, “hey, what’s up?” He walked inside after Seb and started to take off his coat and hat when the other boy turned to grab his arms.

“Well, I’ve honestly just been hanging around so far, but I was thinking we could head out back and, I don’t know, like, make a snowman? Or something?” Seb looked hopefully at Carlos.

Carlos shrugged his coat back on with an eager grin, “yes, that sounds super fun!”

“Ok, great! Let me just put on my coat and boots,” Seb reached into his hall closet to get his winter clothes, including a long knitted rainbow scarf.

“Is that a homemade scarf?” Carlos asked. “Because it’s very cute,” he nodded his approval.

Seb grinned and wrapped it around his neck. “My grandma knitted it and gave it to me for Christmas,” he said, “it’s really cute, she’s been trying so hard to show her acceptance of me being gay ever since I came out to her last year.” Seb closed the closet and walked Carlos through the living room to the house’s back door.

“That’s so sweet, did you manage to fit your entire extended family in here last night?” Carlos asked, trying to imagine dozens of relatives filling the space.

“Don’t ask me how,” Seb laughed, opening the door and stepping out onto the porch. “Between my extended family and the farm animals, there was a lot of chaotic energy here last night.”

Carlos reached out to hold Seb’s hand as they looked out at the untouched snow beyond the porch. “Well, it’s very peaceful now,” he said, leaning his head onto Seb’s shoulder.

Seb took a deep breath and basked in the silence for all of three seconds before yelling, “not for long!” and running off the porch out into the snow.

Carlos laughed and followed suit, trying for fun to step exclusively in the footprints that Seb had made. “You’re such an idiot!” he called after his boyfriend, who was already gathering up snow into a large pile. When Carlos caught up to Seb, he started helping to build the base of the snowman.

They quickly finished the first layer, though that one was the easiest. Seb tried to make a small snowball and roll it around to accumulate more snow for the second layer, but it kept falling apart when it was only half the size that they wanted. When Seb kept failing, Carlos said, “here, watch and learn,” and tried as well, but his snow wouldn’t stick together either.

“You were saying?” Seb smirked and raised an eyebrow at Carlos, who shot him a glare in return.

“Hey, this has always worked for me before, okay?” Carlos countered, playfully hitting Seb on the arm. Seb feigned shock and knelt back down to the ground, forming a snowball again. “What are you doing, honey, it’s not just gonna work all of a sudden-“ Carlos’ sentence was cut off when Seb looked up at him with a mischievous grin and threw the snowball at him.

“Seems like that one worked,” Seb giggled.

Carlos raised his eyebrows at Seb and calmly said, “oh, I see, we’re doing this?” He dropped down to the ground to start making several snowballs, and a look of worry crossed Seb’s face.

“Uh oh…” Seb trailed off, running away from Carlos and the house. He stopped behind a tree and started making his own set of snowballs there, ready to retaliate when Carlos would attack. Seb took a quick peek back around the tree and was immediately met by a snowball to the chest and Carlos running toward him.

“How are your reflexes so fast, what the hell?” Seb laughed, throwing a few snowballs at the quickly-approaching Carlos.

“Ten years of dance training!” Carlos shouted back with a grin and a pirouette. Before he could reach the blonde boy, he dropped his last snowball and stopped to make a new one.

Seb took this as his opportunity to get away and ran in the opposite direction, frantically looking back to see Carlos hot on his trail. “No!” he shrieked and laughed as Carlos hit him right in the center of his back. Seb dramatically dropped to his knees and fell into the snow, turning around so he was on his back.

Carlos stood over him with a triumphant grin. “Do you accept defeat?” he asked.

Seb nodded and held out his hand. “Help me up?” he asked, looking up at Carlos with puppy dog eyes.

Carlos rolled his eyes and laughed, grabbing Seb’s hand. “You shouldn’t have dropped to the floor,” he tried to pull but Seb wouldn’t get up, and instead pulled Carlos to the ground with him.

Carlos let out a shriek but landed gracefully before laying his head carefully back into the snow. Seb laughed and turned to his boyfriend, his face softening into a smile, before looking back up at the clear blue sky again. He stretched out his arms and started sliding them up and down, along with his legs. “Look, a snow angel!” Seb turned his head to Carlos and beamed at him.

Carlos smiled fondly and softly said, “you’re a snow angel,” before blushing madly. “Oh my God that was so cheesy I’m sorry,” he laughed, and Seb giggled.

Seb stopped making the snow angel and shuffled closer so he could wrap an arm around Carlos. “No, I think it’s cute when you say stuff like that,” he chuckled. “It shows that you’re comfortable around me,” he said softly and nuzzled Carlos’ nose with his own.

Carlos stared back at Seb in awe and wrapped his arm around his neck. “Yeah, I guess I am,” he smiled, their faces still nearly touching. Barely needing to move, he leaned in to kiss Seb, slowly and gently. Seb’s arm tightened around Carlos’ back and then his hand started tracing patterns over the other boy’s coat. Carlos played with the hair at the nape of Seb’s neck in response, eliciting a contented sigh. They pulled apart and locked eyes again, not needing any words to express what they were feeling. Carlos leaned back into the snow again and his eyes drifted shut. Maybe it was just the cold, or maybe it was the way that he could feel Seb there without seeing him, but he felt the need to take in the moment, and Seb did the same.

After they had laid in the snow a few minutes longer, both boys started to really process the cold and got up to wander back to their unfinished snowman.

“Let’s try together,” Seb suggested regarding their previous failed attempts at making the second layer. Instead of just rolling a regular snowball around, they placed one on the first layer and packed snow onto it, and it stuck together.

“Nice!” Carlos high-fived Seb when they got the second layer to stay in place. They quickly managed to make the snowman’s head as well.

“I’ll go get some pebbles - can you find a few twigs for the arms back at my tree?” Seb asked with a chuckle.

Carlos picked out two pretty even sticks to be the arms and returned to find Seb giving their snowman pebble eyes, a nose and a mouth. Carlos nodded approvingly and stared at the snowman contemplating how to stick in the arms, earning a laugh from Seb.

Finally he stuck the twigs into the snowman so that they were sticking up, twig hands in the air. “Now we can call him Bob Fosse, what do you think?” Carlos grinned at Seb.

“Sounds about right,” Seb laughed, taking off his hat to put it on Fosse’s head.

“And for the finishing touch,” Carlos said and dramatically put his scarf around the snowman. He stepped back to look proudly at Fosse and took a picture of him.

“You know what? I’m very impressed with our creation!” Seb beamed at Carlos, their gazes lingering on each other. Seb noticed Carlos shiver and his expression turned to one of concern. “You don’t have a scarf anymore!”

“Oh, don’t worry, I’m fine,” Carlos said, his teeth chattering.

“No no, it’s cold! Here, we can share mine,” Seb unwrapped his long rainbow scarf and looped it around Carlos’ neck, pulling him closer and wrapping it around his own neck as well. Both boys laughed at the impracticality of it but Seb just put his arms around Carlos and said, “see?”

Carlos couldn’t help but smile as he glanced up at Seb’s head. “And you don’t have a hat anymore, which means I get to do this,” he grinned as he ran his fingers through Seb’s hair.

The blonde boy thought about protesting in the name of not messing up his hair, but then he realized that he’d already laid in the snow, and besides, it felt really nice. “I won’t complain this time,” he sighed, his eyes fluttering shut at the sensation.

“So the truth comes out, huh?” Carlos chuckled and dropped his hands back down, earning a pout from his boyfriend. Seb tightened the scarf around their necks to bring them closer to each other and crashed their lips together. Carlos was momentarily startled by the action but his eyes squeezed shut and he reacted quickly. His hands flew back up to Seb’s head, running through his hair, and Carlos felt Seb smile into the kiss. He pulled away but placed tons of little kisses over Seb’s cheeks and jaw, earning a small giggle, before returning to his lips. Seb finally pulled away for good and nuzzled his face into Carlos’ neck.

They rested there peacefully for a moment before Seb’s little sister ran out onto the porch and yelled, “Sebby! Can you make us hot chocolate?!!” The boys rolled their eyes with a sigh and laughed.

Seb unwrapped the scarf, leaving it around Carlos’ neck, and took his hand to walk back inside. Seb couldn’t help but kiss Carlos on the cheek right before they walked in. “You just look so cute in my scarf,” he said with an unapologetic smile.

After making hot chocolate for all of the kids, the boys were cleaning up in the kitchen. “You know,” Seb said, turning to Carlos, “we should make this our new Boxing Day tradition, since neither of us had one.”

Carlos smiled and raised his eyebrows at Seb. “Oh yeah? That could work… Which part?”

Seb bit his lip and grinned, wrapping an arm around Carlos’ waist and whispering into his ear, “all of it?”

[photolover82]

The Masked Singer Season 4 Episode 5: Last but not Least, let's (finally) meet Group C! (Commentary and Guesses)

Hey fellow Masked Singer fans! Welcome or welcome back to Ana’s Masked Singer recap, where I, Ana, recap every episode of the Masked Singer. I am so happy to be back after a short break after the World Series (thank God for the Dodgers). If you don’t know how these recaps go, first of all hi, feel free to follow me if you want to see more of these. Anyways, so how these work is that I first talk about who gets eliminated, give my thoughts, and then give my guesses and commentary for the remaining contestants and their performances. I also try to back up my guesses as much as I can by using the clues... even though I guide myself with the voice of the individual contestant. Anyways, having said that, let’s jump into it:

Warning ⚠️: If you haven’t watched the show yet, there are spoilers below, so read at your own risk.. this is your official spoiler alert warning. Don’t say I didn’t warn you...

With this episode, we met our last group of contestants, Group C, which consists of 5 masked characters, Squiggly Monster, Mushroom, Jellyfish, Lips, and Broccoli. Overall, to me, they are the weakest group vocal wise, but they were still fun to watch.

Alright, so let’s talk about the eliminated contestant, who was...

*DRUMROLL PLEASE*

Lips 💋

Performance: Alright, so she sang “Native New Yorker,” by Odessy.... and I really try to be as kind and constructive as I can with these recaps especially when critiquing their performances because being rude really doesn’t solve anything and I want you guys to understand why I don’t like a performance if I dislike a performance (so we can start an open dialogue you get me?) ... but I am so sorry, this lady can’t sing like at all. Oh and I knew exactly who she was (haha insert Ken’s voice into that phrase lol) the moment she opened her mouth. The thing is she is talking and she messed up in the middle by laughing/snorting in the performance, it was kind of hilarious not gonna lie... it made me laugh, which I guess is a good thing, but like yeah it’s kind of obvious why she left first, because she (I mean no offense to this.. well maybe I do because I am not a fan of the person under this mask like at all since she ain’t kind and civil like at all) blew it, like it kinda felt like she messed up on purpose or that she is actually horrible at singing, which is ok because she isn’t supposed to be a professional singer and that’s fine. All that to say Lips made me laugh and I appreciate it but I am kind of glad she was the first one to go....

Anyways, she was revealed to be (to no surprise of my own) controversial talk show host...

Wendy Williams

Whoop whoop, I got it right (as did like everyone who knows who she is because her voice is that distinct... oh and also she spoke during the song so it was kind of obvious, but I am still claiming my victory: Gotten 3/5 correct so far and I am proud of that number)! Anyways here are the clues that pointed to her:

Shock= she says very shocking things on her show and is a pretty polarizing figure, you either love her or hate her (I am not fond of her myself but whatever I guess)

“Speak my truth”= she’s known for stating her mind and is unfiltered with her thoughts on things

West Wing= her initials WW

Fire= Hot Takes is a segment on her show and also a reference to her book Wendy’s Got The Heat

Alright, now that we have finished with her, let’s talk about our remaining 4 masked contestants:

1. Squiggly Monster 👾

Performance: I really liked his performance of Have You Ever Seen the Rain by Creedence Clearwater Revival. He did super well, like I really liked it, I had low expectations because of the costume (it’s kind of creepy looking ngl) but I was pleasantly surprised. Having said that, the moment I heard him, because of his tone, I knew exactly who it was (again insert Ken’s voice here)...

So, for my guess, I think it is Full House actor/comedian:

Bob Saget

Ok, so besides the voice, lemme give you why I think that clues wise (credit goes to this Screen Rant article for the details idk on my own):

Penguin visual in the package= he directed a parody nature documentary called Farce of the Penguins

Father and a scoundrel= father part due to him actually being a father to 3 girls/his role on Full House as Danny Tanner (a single father of 3 daughters which I think is wow funny) and the scoundrel part referring to his raunchy/dirty comedy

Cookie clues= nod to Michelle from Full House and her love of cookies

“Breaking News” and him on a news show kind of thing= reference to his Full House character Danny Tanner being an anchor for Good Morning San Francisco

He also was on the show as a shrimp cocktail as the friend for the Taco aka Tom Bergeron! So it makes sense for him to come back this season which I am all into

2. Mushroom 🍄

Performance: Ok, so this is like the most confusing, is it a he or is it a she? That’s the biggest question, my money’s on a boy... so my guess is going to be male (I am gonna call Mushroom a he because of that so I apologize if I am misgendering them, I just need to narrow it down somehow and I am gendering them based on who I think it is, and I feel like he is the correct pronoun). Anyways, I love him, he’s my favorite Group C contestant, and his performance of This Woman’s Work was amazing, people said it was not good, but I really enjoyed it because I am a sucker for a good falsetto and this guy was almost all falsetto, I was feeling it. Having said that, maybe I like him so much because I feel like it is someone I adore, like if I meet him, I will faint status...

Having said that, I think it is Broadway star, heartthrob, actor, singer, adorable human...

Jordan Fisher

Omg he is so cute... sorry I am gonna stop being 😍 for him I promise. Anyways, big clue was a video of him singing this exact song (I think it sounds so similar, but you guys can judge for yourselves), here it is: https://youtu.be/3lzRsMl8M8Q

Apart from that, here are some actual clues (with a bit of help from this Screen Rant article) that got my mind thinking it is him:

WAITTT 🤔... before we get into that, what I found interesting is that he tweeted and I quote “Seasonal tweet to let everyone know that ____ on the masked singer is once again not me 💜” and THE MASKED SINGER RETWEETED IT... but also I just checked and this is the first time he’s ever had to clear that up... soooo maybe he’s a liar (bc of an NDA ofc you cannot really spill the beans.... but let’s go with he’s a liar)... a cute liar... but he’s lying.

Ok, now onto the clues:

A lot of Hamilton clues= “a healer and a scholar,” “young, scrappy, and fun-gy,” “shroom where it happens” = he replaced Anthony Ramos as John Laurens/Philip Hamilton in the Broadway musical Hamilton (and also can reference his Broadway roots in general like being on Dear Evan Hansen)

Started at a “rat race” and Men in Black were mice= could be a reference to his start on Disney (Liv and Maddie and Teen Beach Movie)

A shot to turn a hobby into a career= reference to him streaming video games on Twitch

Stars clue with audience= he won Dancing with the Stars back in 2017 and also hosted DWTS Junior

3. Jellyfish 💚

Performance: I really liked her performance of Big Girls Don’t Cry by Fergie even though I felt like she was holding back a bit (I can kind of say the same about Mushroom... but I still enjoyed it). I am really curious to see what she can really do, because I felt her nerves in the performance and like she can do more. This one’s killing me because I feel like I have heard that voice but I can’t put my finger on who it could be

So, with that said, I have no idea who to guess:

But I do know that it isn’t ✨Billie Elish✨

No, but like seriously, that ain’t Billie Elish even tho a lot of people are guessing it, I am not buying it... you’ll see why in a second, here are the clues:

The Little(ish) Jellyfish title on a book

Reigned supreme in an underwater kingdom

Fans, Tiara (“princess”)

Angel Fish

Flower Crown

Missed out on normal girl stuff like parties and making friends

Billie Elish “Bad Guy” lyrics in the background= that’s way too obvious for it to be Billie Elish

4. Broccoli 🥦

Performance: His performance of House is Rockin’/Whole Lotta Shakin Going On by Stevie Ray Vaughan/Jerry Lee Lewis was not what I expected to be honest. I thought it was going to be someone younger or a rapper, but it was an older gentlemen, and he was rockin, not gonna lie. I really liked it, not my favorite though I don’t think he is bad by any means. Anyways, I feel like I know who it is... maybe I am getting this from another person on YT’s guess who I really liked (Shoutout to them idk their user sorry)

So, for my guess for the Broccoli, I think it is legendary singer...

Paul Anka

The reason why is because of the following clues:

Can of Soup= he won a Campell’s Soup competition and that jump started his career

Tik Tok reference= his song Put Your Head on My Shoulder went viral on Tik Tok

Also, the letterman jacket is very 60s which is his era I guess (my mom knows more ab it than I do)

Anyways, that’s it, guys! I hope you enjoyed this recap, I apologize for how long they are, it’s kind of my thing lol! Don’t forget to comment your guesses (do you agree with me? Disagree? I wanna know below... especially Jellyfish guesses bc I have no idea who she can be), like, and follow for more Masked Singer content. I’ll see you all next week for the Group C Playoffs! Bye guys! 👋🏼

[heisenbergchronicles]

APPRECIATION & INTERVIEW

Better Call Saul episode posters by Matt Talbot After 4 nearly years, I thought it was time to catch up with Matt Talbot about his Better Call Saul poster project. The last time we talked during Season 1, Matt was deep in the hustle of making his name as an illustrator: juggling a full-time job, freelance projects, as well as band. Finding time for personal projects like this one can be a significant challenge. (Not to mention surviving the death of your tools: During Season 1 his Mac laptop died, and this season, his Wacom tablet bit the bullet). But despite these challenges, the 43-year-old New Hampshire native has persevered to create a clever and thoughtful series of episode posters that has garnered considerable attention, and brought with it new high-profile clients and art exhibitions. 

First, congratulations on all of your success and recognition with this series of posters. It’s well-deserved. What’s been the most gratifying feedback you’ve received? Thank you! Every interaction I’ve had with anyone from the show has delighted me. I've been surprised by all of the cast and crew members who have said nice things – every note I’ve gotten has meant a lot to me. That being said, Michael McKean randomly tweeting at me that he has my poster for Chicanery hanging in his home blew my mind. I was eating dinner when my phone showed the notification and I literally jumped up from the table. I’ve been a fan of Michael’s since I saw Spinal Tap in the ‘80s and never in a million years would I have guessed I’d make something he valued enough to hang in his home.

Tell me about your contributions to Gallery1988 exhibitions. How does that process work? It's a pretty simple process. They invite me to be part of a show, and I make something to send them. I’m very excited for the opportunity to show there, and I feel like it’s a milestone in my art-making career.

Across the 4 seasons, which BCS posters are your favorites? Which one are you most proud of? I’m particularly fond of Rebecca, Rico, Marco, Switch, Sunk Costs and Something Beautiful. Oh man, it's hard for me to evaluate my own stuff. I tend to like the posters where I find a way to get a different take on something they did in the episode. I would say that “Sunk Costs” is also one of my favorites because I did something differently than how they shot it, and because Mike is so recognizable even from the back. I was also pleased with “Off Brand” because it was when I finally figured out how to draw Bob Odenkirk.

How has your process for creating these posters evolved over 4 seasons? When I started this project I had a vague idea that I would focus on scenes rather than portraits or likenesses, but that didn’t even last half a season! The characters were too good not to include. In that way, the posters have evolved in my willingness to draw characters, and also, hopefully, my ability to draw them. 

My process is now something like: Watch the show on Monday; think about it on Tuesday, figure out what stood out to me and do a thumbnail sketch or two; draw it on Wednesday night; post it Thursday afternoon. I’m a bit faster at drawing these now compared to when I started. And I’m a bit more decisive on choosing which subject matter to depict.

There have been quite a few changes on the visual side of Better Call Saul over the last 2 seasons. New directors (Minkie Spiro, Daniel Sackheim, and Andrew Stanton), a new cinematographer Marshall Adams, even new cameras. What are your thoughts on how the show’s visual grammar has evolved? Has any of this impacted your posters from Seasons 3 & 4? I try not to just redraw literal scenes from the show, and I don’t need to tell you that they shoot the show in an incredibly beautiful way. I mean, they always, always, pick the best angle, the best shot to capture something. For that reason, it’s sometimes hard to to come up with another take on a moment from the show.

That being said, the visual style hasn’t really impacted my posters as much as the evolving subject matter has. The show, I think, is substantially darker than it was in the early going. It was easier to depict Jimmy’s hi-jinx in the first couple seasons. But with Chuck’s deteriorating mental state, the cartel stuff, Mike going deeper into Fring’s world and of course, Jimmy’s loosening sense of morals, the funny moments are harder to spot. That’s lead me to some more somber layouts and color choices.

We didn’t discuss this in our first interview. Which typeface are you using in your posters, or is this custom typography? The main logo and episode titles are set in Sign Painter, from the excellent House Industries.

The Heisenverse is known for it’s color theory and use of color. How has that impacted your color choices in these posters? I’ve kind of adhered to their blue=good/red=bad symbolism, but I also try to balance out colors between episodes and not repeat myself in sequential posters.

Many of your posters (especially ones this season) use a monochromatic, or simple palette of 1-2 colors. Tell me more about why you chose that approach. Is this a signature of your style? I’ve seen this approach in a lot of your work. You know, in the early seasons, I was trying to use simpler color palettes, but I wasn’t very disciplined and I got away from that. I’m trying to stick to a more consistent style in season 4. It is a conscious decision. I also feel like with the week-to-week nature of this project, it helps quickly set apart each poster. And, I really do love limited color palettes. Giving myself color constraints helps me figure out different ways to solve layout problems.

I’ve heard other illustrators say that Bob Odenkirk’s facial features are tricky to capture. Do you share that sentiment? Which characters are more challenging to illustrate? I do agree with that. I had a really hard time with him at first. I kind of think I have a better handle on it now, but I’m always trying to get better. I feel like if you can get his mouth right, it goes a long way.

I found Hector hard to capture both times I drew him. Mike, on the other hand, is just pure fun to draw. Jonathan Banks is so distinctive and iconic.

What’s been the most difficult poster thus far? Why was it challenging? Maybe it’s because a lot of time has gone by, but I can't think of one that stands out as having been really difficult.

Francesco Francavilla did alternate posters for some of his Breaking Bad posters. Inevitably, when artists look back at their work, they consider revising or redoing it because of a variety of reasons – their point of view has changed, their skill/style has evolved, or maybe they were never truly content with the final product. Looking back at 4 seasons worth of posters, are there any that make you want to scratch the revision itch? Yeah, more than I would care to admit. I would really like another crack at Amarillo. I know I could do a better job and that drawing is just super flat. In season two, I decided to to experiment with style and I kind of wish I hadn't. I like Cobbler, but I wish I had drawn it in my normal style. I would redraw Nailed for sure. Oh man, if I start going down this road it's not going to end well, so I'll just stop.

You mentioned earlier this season you were excited to draw Track Suit Jimmy. Who or what haven’t you drawn, that you are eager to illustrate? Howard! It bums me out to no end that I haven't drawn him, but it just hasn't worked out. And I need to include Kim more. It's kind of criminal that her face only appeared for the first time in a poster this season.

What’s your opinion of Season 4? Tell me about your favorites – episode, scene, character. I think season 4 is brilliant so far. The Kim/Jimmy relationship has deepened so much this season, and feels so real, but full of inevitable heartache. Oh, the flash-forward to Breaking Bad’s timeline was amazing. Mike doing his audit in the Madrigal warehouse. Really, anything Michael Mando does on screen. It's hard to pick. I so enjoy the deliberate pace of this show.

Where’s your favorite place to discuss the show? I honestly don’t talk about it too much online, though I lurk in a few places and read a lot. I actually discuss it mostly with my wife!

I know you get this question a lot, so let’s cover it here so folks understand: Do you have plans to sell any of this work online? I really appreciate that people like it enough to want to buy it or hang it, but I don't plan to sell the Better Call Saul posters online. I’m doing this for fun, not to make a buck off the show, and I don’t own the rights to sell it anyway.

What’s next for Matt? Do you have any other poster or illustration projects in the works? Is you band performing soon? I have several more pieces for Gallery1988 shows coming up. I’m pulling together an art show at a local brewery for whom I design all of their labels and stuff. I’m patiently waiting for a t-shirt I designed for one of my all-time favorite movies to be announced. And for the past several Octobers, I spent the month drawing a horror poster per day. I’m not sure if logistically I can do that again this year, but I’ll probably fit at least a few in. We’ll see how it goes. Sadly, with all of my illustration work, I haven’t had any time for music making, but someday I hope to get back to that!

Follow Matt: Web site / Tumblr / Twitter / Dribbble / Instagram / PosterSpy

– Interview by Shayne Bowman, Heisenberg Chronicles

[bandaged-chessmaster]

Oh God I got tagged in so many of these that I couldn’t ignore it >.<

Rules: 1. Answer these eleven questions 2. Make eleven of your own questions 3. Tag eleven people!

@narkaoh‘s Questions

1.) Favorite book? Hmmm, it’s been a while since I’ve read a book, so I’ll go with the last book I read, No Longer Human 2.) Favorite movie? Argh! Don’t do this to me! I’ll go with a Tamil film here, it’s called ‘Mozhi’ (Language) and it’s a cute rom-com about a dubbing artist and musician falling for a deaf and dumb girl. 3.) What actor do you absolutely ffffucking hate? Robert Pattinson, he just has a slappable face. 4.) How often do you read fics? (I see you on AO3, heathens.) Reading a fic right now....

5.) Are you a morning or an evening person? I’m a night owl!

6.) Best memory? Getting first place in a writing competition!

7.) Lemme get them digits? (LMAO THIS IS FILLER, I’M K I D D I N G) 420-360-6969

8.) What the hell is your favorite meme? I gotta know this one. STOP IT WITH THESE HARD QUESTIONS!!! ;A;

9.) Favorite ship? (For… uh.. research purposes.) Currently Soukoku!

10.) If you could pick one person to take with you on a deserted island, who would it be and why? @raven-rein​, she can calm me down, and it would be fun~

11.) Are you a cat or dog person, or both? (VITAL INFORMATION. I am JUDGING U.) I’m a 110% cat person!

@pitch-black-hearts‘s Questions

1.)Favourite tea/coffee? Filter coffee is bae 2.)Russian kink or soviet kink? Neither I have a Gogol kink

3.)Chuuya’s hips or Dazai’s thighs? Dazai’s thighs please 4.)Do you pronounce Gnocchi right? Yes 5.)I’ll kick your ass if your aren’t getting enough sleep just saying. Try me binch 6.)Opinion on Mori? He’s a very good Mafia boss, and I wanna see more of his past with Fukuzawa! 7.)What style is your fashion? Comfort is key 8.)Teal or Lavender? Teal! 9.)Have you ever used a bath bomb? Nope....sadly 10.)What colour do you wish your hair was (natural or not)? Bubble gum pink! 11.)I love you <3 wwwwwww (////////)

@willofd11‘s Questions

1. What is your favorite thing to do during your spare time? Listen to music and stare at the wall 2. Favorite Anime/Manga/Game Character?

3. Favorite book? Already answered! 4. If you can change one thing that happened in your past that had happened, what would it be? Me berating myself for getting attracted to girls 5. If you can have any kind of ability you can think of, what will it be? I want something similar to Yang’s semblance, that is, the ability to absorb energy and return it twice the amount! 6. Favorite dessert? Right now I’m craving rasgullas 7. What is your favorite season? Autumn, the colours are really pretty~ 8. Any fun plans over the holidays? Hmm, I used to as a kid, but not nowadays 9. Favorite song? Currently it’s Techno Distance (Innerve remix) 10. If you can be any kind of animal, what would it be? A kitty~ 11. Sure this is not a question, but here are some hugs and cookies to go with it and I hope you have a wonderful day <3 Awww thank you~

@mj-bing-cassidy‘s Questions

1.What season is your favourite? Answered!

2.Scarves, gloves, hats, or none at all? Gloves~

3.Long car rides or quiet reading time on Saturday mornings? Long car ridess

4.Do you do homework on time or no? I submit it on time tho

5.Can you do a kartwheel? No....

6.What hairstyle do you have? Layered bob cut

7.Favourite colour? Shocking Pink(#FC0FC0)

8.Puppies or kittens? KITTIES!!!!

9.How do you prefer your marshmallows? With hot chocolate~

10.Can you speak another language? I speak 4 languages, and I’m learning another one!

11.What was your favourite age? 11 years old~

@missmizpah‘s Questions

1. Opinion on nuts? C R O N C H

2. Favorite book genre? Fantasy~

3. Worst injury/illness? I was dehydrated to the point where I was throwing up even after drinking water

4. What attracts you to someone platonically? HUMOUR!!! Also chocolate and kindness~

5. What was the last dream you had? .....It was a rather sad one, so I don’t wanna talk about it....

6. Are you someone who eats cough drops like candy? DON’T CALL ME OUT!! >:T

7. Native language? Tamil

8. What size shoes do you wear? Size 6 on UK

9. What is your current hair length? Up till my nape

10. One habit you’re sure is specific to you? Pacing around while listening to music

11. How far would you swim out into the ocean? Till I die

@excitable-nugget‘s Questions

1.If you could have one sense enhanced, what would it be? Eyesight, so that I can stop wearing spectacles 2.Can you link your hands behind your back with one over the shoulder and one under? (like this) Pffff that’s easy! 3.Favourite colour to wear, or your favourite colour in general? My most prominent colour is red,or black 4.What was your internet pseudonym when you were 12-14? HakuniUzume on dA 5.What’s your favourite meat-based dish? If you don’t eat meat, what’s your favourite dish in general? Nothing beats a good mutton biryani! 6.Would you rather be known as wise or strong? Why not both? Hmmm, I’d prefer it’s better to be known as wise 7.What’s your favourite physical feature about yourself? I guess my eyes are pretty :T 8.Would you rather explore the ocean depths or space? Ocean depths! Best to know your own planet well first~ 9.What’s your favourite snack food? Jim jam biscuits! 10.If you could make one thing from fiction (e.g. a character, a place, a food, a machine) real, what would it be? Kunikida’s notebook, really covers my stationary needs!

11.Is Australia real or just a conspiracy? ....what’s Australia?

@kiimone��s Questions

1. how many times do you nut a day? (if you say 0 then im unfriending bc you’re boring) 0 FIGHT ME!!!!

2. in what way do you indulge in your rarepairs? Don’t you mean most of my pairs? Daydreaming about them and writing cute hcs

3. would you hire a deep web hitman to take you out? Hell yeah, I need money though

4. what’s your favorite not-english song? Bish I listen to only Vocaloid songs....I guess a fave has to be Satisfaction

5. who would win: a shark or a grizzly bear? Bear cause bear is stronk on both land and water

6. are you willing to try new things without having time to adjust to it? That’s where the kick of trying new things comes from doesn’t it? :3c

7. would you smash. me. Hmmm sure. You’re cute.

8. i ran out of questions im sorry. Awwww that’s ok~ *pat pat*

@chom-raaa​’s Questions

1. Heroes gone bad or villains becoming good? Both! Don’t make me choose ;~;

2. Did you ever get in trouble in school? When was the last time and what was it about? I choked a guy to the point where he passed out in 5th grade

3. Hot drinks or cold drinks? Cold drinks! The weather is too hot for me to enjoy it

4. Any siblings? Older/younger? Would you have it any other way? I have an older brither, I would have liked to have an older sister too

5. You most prized possession? My medals, and my Miku figurine!

6. What’s a fandom trope that makes you uncomfortable? Uhhh, not exactly uncomfortable, but the entire mischaracterisation and woobification of the Port Mafia members really gets under my skin

7. What do find attractive in a fictional character? Voice, messy hair, bedroom eyes Dazai

8. If could bring a character back to life but sacrifice another character in return (major-ish characters for those fandoms with a big cast), who would you choose? ODASAKU FOR LOVECRAFT 

9. Long fics or short fics? In terms of both reading and writing? Long fics for both~

10. Are you content with who you are? No, I have a lot of room for improvement

11. What is holding you back from getting what you want? Procrastination

*cracks knuckles*

1. What do you hate but you wished you love? 2. What’s the best pizza you’ve eaten? 3. A song that you’ll never skip? 4. The best and worst song lyric you’ve heard? 5. What is something beautiful you see every day? 6. What smells make you happy? 7. When is the last time you cried? 8. What is the worst thing your mom caught you doing as a kid?  9. What was your first kiss like? 10. What is something that you seriously take for granted? 11. What is your worst experience in a foreign country? 

Tagging: @nenufair  @the-ol-razzle-daz-azzle @ariukoart @eien-misui-ni-goodbye @dearyoon-gi @aekgolan @joo-joo-bee @raven-rein @world-of-shadows @lyberti-lynn @godkidcharlie

(Do it if you wanna~)

[elevenmlke]

hey y’all!! I already did the questions game here but some more people wanted me to answer questions so here they are!! (both are under the cut)

tagged by @mileven-and-contemplation (thank you!! I love your url btw!!)

1. How did you start watching stranger things?

I started watching because I think a lot of friends told me about it. I was super sick of hearing everyone talk about it at school and not knowing what they were going on about. fun fact: I was on my phone so much during chapter 1 that I had to go back and rewatch it bc I didn’t understand what was happening

2. Which character would you say you are most like?

I’m most like mike I think. I feel like he and I are both trying to be leaders, and I also care really deeply about all of my friends. I’m also a lot like will though

3. What’s your favorite thing to do on your free time?

I read a lot and I watch tv and movies

4. Is there a place you’ve always wanted to visit?

I’ve never been to europe but it’s on my bucket list

5. If you could have one wish what would you say?

more wishes lmao

for real though probably for trump to be out of office

6. Any hopes for season 3?

more mileven content and also canonically gay will. I just want my kids to be happy

7. Is there anything you would have changed from season 2?

I wish billy would’ve died instead of bob

8. Favorite food?

pastaaa

9. Do you have any pets??

not at the moment

10. Favorite song at the moment?

there are too many to choose

11. If you could have any superpower what would you choose?

probably mind reading or telekinesis

thank you!!

tagged by @willthewisest (thank you so much!!)

1. What’s your favorite color?

I like blues and orange sometimes

2. Any unpopular st opinions?

I mean this isn’t really *unpopular* but I have a bone to pick with bob because he’s kinda the reason will got possessed. I would still give anything to have him back though. 

3. Has a scene in Stranger Things ever made you cry? If so, which one(s)?

none in season 1, but in season 2 there were a few. (spoilers!!) when el tried to find mike in the void and we found out that she heard his calls every single day, when joyce, jonathan, and mike all told will their stories to try to get him to wake up, the mileven reunion (and that whole part when mike yelled at hopper), and basically the entire snow ball scene

4. If you absolutely HAD to sacrifice one of the main 6 kids who would you pick? (this one’s evil i’m so sorry)

nononononononononono

5. Who’s your favorite character from each of the age groups on the show (kids, teens, adults)?

mike or el is my favorite kid, steve (duh) is my favorite teen, and joyce is my favorite adult

6. Favorite video game?

mario kart

7. What do you think about the fact that Dr. Brenner is still alive?

that shithead can die in a hole

8. 3 Musketeers - yay or nay?

I actually loved them before ST but now I have an excuse to like them

9. Have you ever tried to keep something as a pet that you knew wasn’t supposed to be one?

omg storytime

I found this ladybug while we were doing yard work and I took it inside and put it in a little plastic container in my room. I went back out and when I came back in it was gone. I tried to find it but I couldn’t. flash forward a few weeks and the ladybug crawled onto the homework I was doing at my desk. I tried to keep it alive but it died the next day. rip ladybug

10. Steve - a shitty boyfriend and a pretty good babysitter, or a shitty babysitter and a pretty good boyfriend?

uhhhhh well i’m gonna say shitty boyfriend and a pretty good babysitter bc he wasn’t the best at the beginning of season 1 but he had such good character development that he was amazing by the end of s1. 

11. Favorite song of the st soundtrack?

sounds predictable but I love should I stay or should I go

thank you!

[todaysbiggesthits]

The Exam

Best Music Moment of 2017:

Code: dancing out the entire wedding reception playlist with my best girl on an empty concrete slab on a breezy texas night

BC: -The absolute stellar dance party at Codemin’s Wedding; most notably:

     “Carol” by The Rolling Stones

     “Enjoy the Silence” by Depeche Mode

     “Crystal” by New Order

-OK Computer’s 20th Anniversary and the listening/reflection that came with it -My four year old, Emmett, learning “Maps” on the drums pretty much on his own

JD: February: Watching the “Emotional Rescue” scene in A Bigger Splash:

March: Seeing Stop Making Sense on the big screen at my favorite theater with m’gal and a David Byrne Q&A after the screening. April: The dance party of a lifetime at Code and Arden’s wedding. November: Watching Parquet Courts play “You’ve Got Me Wondering Now” for the first time in years.

C: "Born to Run" at a good friend's, Brian Ferguson's, wedding.

Nasty: This playing at the end of Leftovers Season 3, Ep 5 - "The Most Powerful Man in the World"

Bronco: Sitting on my back porch with Brenny, sipping down some delicious whiskey drinks and listening to the new Mastodon on a surprisingly unshitty Amazon bluetooth speaker. Watching his face on the breakdown in Jaguar God was quite entertaining. Also listening to the Squalus album (the metal interpretation of Jaws) with the kids, my oldest asking what it was, and him saying he wants to watch Jaws now. He was especially fascinated by the USS Indianapolis part of the story.

Laser: This 

Chap: My 17 has been dominated by the two new ladies in my life. I made this mix for them:

and played it for them on random the morning they were born. This was the first song that came on:

and I finally broke down with emotion after the 36 hour experience while holding one of them while this song was playing:

Best Shows Seen in 2017:

BC: This first 60 seconds of this:

Nasty: Future Islands & Action Bronson

Larse: Future Islands with Maddie, Nasty, and Sam; Action Bronson at The Rave - pretty sure I got a contact high just from being in the show

C: War on Drugs

Bronco: Mastodon

Codem: lvl up - beat kitchen kitten forever - subterranean downstairs ovlov - beat kitchen pqc - the bottle girlpool - logan square auditorium moving units’ joy division cover set - the bottle PAWS - cobra lounge a. savage - the bottle pictureplane

JD: 1. William Basinski and Julianna Barwick at National Sawdust 2. No Age at Elsewhere 3. Parquet Courts and B-Boys at Elsewhere 4. Liars at Warsaw 5. Deerhunter and Eleanor Friedberger performing while Bradford Cox painted her portrait onstage at Warsaw 6. LCD Soundsystem at Brooklyn Steel 7. Yo La Tengo in Central Park 8. Andrew WK at Warsaw 9. Vince Staples at Panorama Fest 10. Wire at Baby’s All Right 11. Vagabon at Brooklyn Bazaar

Confession of 2017:

Bronco: I listened to the New Kids On The Block offering of 2017 "Thankful" (it was fucking terrible).

C: Still haven’t listened to LCD Soundsystem

Code: -knowing the backstory, the mount eerie album was probably the best album i heard this year, but it was too dang sad to listen to more than a handful of times. -i still loved that brand new song despite the lead cat being a creep. -i thought that this year was pretty rough for music, but my tune changed after looking back through my top tracks.  maybe there were just so few full albums that i liked? -i fast fwd'd through every SNL musical guest this calendar year, but i did catch the tom petty tribute from the vegas countrymin. 

BC: I don’t hate that objectively awful Chainsmokers/Coldplay song because it reminds me of this year’s BOB since Creevey played it every twenty minutes for 36 holes.

Larson: Listened to more rap this year than I think I have in past years; must be Nasty's Lincoln influence!

Nasty: I listened to more podcasts than music in 17.

Biggest Disappointment of 2017:

Laser: LCD Soundsystem

Codem: -no chromatics this year. -the two lcd shows that i saw this year.

Chap: The albums. I would not be shocked if I didn't listen to any of my top 15 all the way through after today.

Bin: DJT

JD: Mondanile

BC: Real Estate.  I think they need to invite the perv back into the band.

Bronco: Bison, Monolord, Godspeed You! Black Emperor, And So I Watch You From Afar. They all put out albums this year, and I've like their stuff in the past, but they did little to nothing for me this time around.

Most Overrated of 2017:

Codem: slowdive, but also twod and japanese breakfast

Bin: Bodak Yellow / Cardi B

Larse: LCD Soundsystem

Bronco: -Pallbearer - just don't like the guy's voice, and though they're slow as shit, there's no good riffs or anything to connect with for me. -Code Orange - hardcore band that I just don't get. One of those 'motherfucker I'm the best!' type super close to being alt-right supremecy type bands even though they're probably completely against it. They're at the top of most metal lists this year. I've given them 4-5 spins, most in reaction to the praise they're getting, but I just don't get it. -Royal Thunder - just one big case of blue balls. All of their songs seemingly build toward a climax that never happens. It's just so blech.

JD: Did the music press even treat anything as a lasting work of art and not ephemeral content to get through a week or two of famous personality driven clicks? King Krule? 

BC: Lorde, I think?  I mean, that album’s gotten a lot of love this year and I thought the lead single – “Green Light” – was hot garbage. It spawned a conspiracy theory in my mind that Taylor Swift was proactively influencing and then purposefully sabotaging the work of her close friends (see Lorde, Haim, et al).

Make it Stop 2017

Bronco: Sex monsters. Can we just take all white dudes in powerful positions, assume they've sexually assaulted at least one person, imprison them, and move on? We could take everything they have, give it all to Native American tribes, then force them to walk their own trail of tears to live out their lives in the desserts of New Mexico, and force them to build the wall, but it would just be a wall around their sad sex monster reservation.

Also, Taylor Swift.

Nasty: I didn't have the luxury of expending any real hate on music this year... which I'm just now recognizing as a bad thing.

JD: -Unceasing sadness and anxiety about the present and future. -Jack Antonoff

BC: Life on this planet.

Code: any rap station that i hear in an uber. that cardi b song was playing every time i caught a cab at 5:30 a.m. to play golf.

Larson: U2

Biggest TBH Regret of 2017:

BC: Not seeing NIN at RiotFest

Larson: Skipping the Car Seat Headrest show at Summerfest because I could tell Maddie didn't want to leave Jonas' party (party was fun, so not a real loss, just wish I would have seen the show).

Nasty: Not even giving new artists a chance. I'll listen to an average album from The National 10x's before I give someone new a shot.

Codebreaker: not having an opportunity to karaoke badu's tyrone

JD: -Had the worst fever of my life during LCD and could only manage standing in the back shivering. -Forgetting to go see Dinner at Baby’s All Right. -Not enough time with Bjork, Miguel, and Blanck Mass. 

Bronco: Fucked up the family calendar maintenance and ended up not being able to see the Toadies and Local H. I was pissed at my wife, but it wasn't the end of the world. I haven't listened to either in forever, and the listen I gave to the Toadies latest offering didn't knock my socks off. It was really just for nostalgic purposes. Still it sucked to have to miss it despite my best efforts to bring it to her attention multiple times.

Detective Murtaugh of 2017:

NACK: I had two separate opportunities to see LCD, and just didn't feel like putting in the effort. Was going to put this as a regret, but I don't regret it.

Code: i skipped 7 shows that i had tickets for and left 6 shows early. two shows i left early due to brightness of lights.  mmmmmnhh

JD: Couldn’t hear for 18 hours after No Age. Needed two Tylenol for the headache I gave myself during “You’ve Got Me Wondering Now” at PQ Quartz.

BC: Having no idea who either the SNL host or the musical guest was for three straight weeks.  Tiffany Haddish? Saoirse Ronan? SZA? I’m too old for this shit…

Nasty: Carson, Maddie, Sam and I went to watch the IU game this weekend with one of Carson's co-workers (an IU grad) who is 23.... I got rolling on a rant about how important it is to enjoy your 20s because after the impending onslaught of weddings and babies life basically isn't any fun anymore. Suspect it was a little too impassioned by the end.

Bronco: I was enrolled in a three month coding bootcamp to learn Web Development. Aside from the two older ladies (50+) and the weird Brazilian idiot (45+), I was the oldest person in the room by probably an average of 13 years. They are all for the most part life-pivoting in to the dev world and they all have all the time in the world to learn new shit, do whatever they want, whenever they want...goddamnit I miss that. So maybe this is my "too married and fathered for this shit" section of the exam.

C: Wife’s Pregnancy

Laser: Every time I wake up with a fucking hangover and tell myself that I’m not gonna drink like that again only to get back on the saddle the next available opportunity.

Resolution for 2017 Update:

BC: Put a goddamn band together. How it went: 

C: Check out some jazz/blues in Chicago. How it went: FAILED

Larson:  Focus on the shit I really care about instead of trying to listen to everything posted on the thread…I’m just going to have to be honest with myself and realize I ain’t got time for all this media! How it went: Terrible; found myself listening to Timeless Pop Rock hits playlist more than anything else.

Chap: Check out more of the recommendations on the TBH thread. Try to organize get-togethers around TWO shows. How it went: Actually not bad. I had a few solid period during nap times when I didn't feel like working. I think I was able to listen to every album I wanted to at least once.

Code: make concerted effort to listen to music that i liked in previous years in addition to music from the current year. How it went: i nailed my resolution, as i devoted four full months to the grateful dead and it was the best musical trimester of the year for me. it was really interesting to watch all of the new music pile up and never once feeling compelled to listen to something else. god damn did the '77 version of the band have it all figured out. i could listen to any uptown mississippi halfstep toodeloo from that year at any time.

Bronco: Learn the guitar. I’ve been fooling around with Rocksmith (guitar hero with real guitar) and I want to push myself to execute the more complex chords, not just stick to the powerchord simple songs like Blitzkrieg Bop, and start learning how to build and execute a solo. I also want to distill my own whiskey, build a garden shed from scratch, and learn to code. How it went: I haven't quite mastered the guitar, but I can play a few songs fairly well. I did not start working on my own whiskey or build a garden shed from scratch...yet. But I did learn to code. I am now at conversational levels of fluency with Javascript and at "donde es el bano" levels with Ruby and Python.

Nasty: See a show in NY with JD. How it went: Not great, Bob! I barely made it down the street to see Action Bronson with Laser 

JD: Seeing more shows with you guys is an evergreen resolution. How it went: To quote BC,

Resolution for 2018:

BC: No more resolutions

C: Catch some jazz in Chicago

Laser: get my list in on time!

Chap: While I didn't have the occasion to catch shows this year, I anticipate doing so in '18 due to some changes afoot.

Codem: make more playlists for my wife

Bronco: Get in shape. I want to stick to a schedule of running all year round. I ran a 10K back in June, then needed to recover for a bit, been recovering ever since...Fat Dad needs to keep running all year round without excuse, especially given that we go skiing between Xmas and New Year's and I'm gonna be a floppy legged mess. During those runs, I'll try to listen to new material each time.

Bin: I'm just going to keep saying "get to NY for a show with JD" until I make it happen. 

JD: See you gents more often with or without a show attached. 

Most Anticipated of 2018:

C: MBV

JD: MBV, No Age, Panda Bear, something surprising

Code: chromatics (i think it's really coming this year), mbv, no age, DOM, CCFX full album

Bronco: Tool. Fourth year's the charm...fuck those guys. It better suck me off when it finally does come out. Also a new Sleep album and a new High on Fire album...still waitin' on those too.

BC: Simple Minds, Vampire Weekend, Kanye

Nasty: Kanye, ASAP Rocky, Rhye, Chromeo, Vampire Weekend

Chap: After a quick glance at the list... Vampire Weekend, Kanye, Chromatics

Larse: Honestly don't even know what is on the horizon, just hope I can listen to it with this net neutrality bullshit!