#bc i dont. i cant theres just no fucken way i could lmao. but also

[wabblebees]

ok so im fINALLy catching up on d20 rn (my beloved) and just started court of fey & flowers earlier today and oh my GOD. IM CRYING. LOU WILSON I ADORE YOU

to give no context whatsoever, the particular sentence im dying over rn was:

"i believe he was shy. but i ALSO believe his mother is just a stern breeze, and THAT can't be good for social skills"

[babyprime]

Fallout !!!! For the ask meme

*longest ye boi ever*

Favorite character: im gonna have to go for ONE per game that ive played cause otherwise id just die probably? butch deloria, john hancock, and ten of spades. My Fuckening Boys.

Least Favorite character: i just do not goddamn care for that vulpes guy. i just dont fucking like him! everyone apparently thinks hes SO HOT but he annoys the shit out of me for some reason. ivehadenoughofthisdude.jpg i also feel this way abt maxson but i think they have something in common! ppl wanna fuck both of em for some reason so im constantly hearing about em to the point where its like Shut The Up

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): ive got like so many? butch/m!lone wanderer, nick/hancock, preston/hancock (which im convinced im the ONLY person on this earth to ship), m!courier/arcade, m!courier/ten of spades

Character I find most attractive: Daddy Valentine. and marcus. and preston. and hancock.

Character I would marry: preston garvey is the most marriage material in this franchise or any other

Character I would be best friends with: anyone who would let me make AWFUL kink jokes as my friends do and i feel in my heart that person would be deacon

A random thought: the first time i saw a feral ghoul in fo4 i literally got so scared i cried. like the graphics were TOO good and i wasnt expecting them to just GET UP like that even tho i knew they go dormant but it just startled me into tears. honestly my first feral encounter in any playthrough makes me jump but i just Did Not Like That 

An unpopular opinion: i think its super unfair that the lone wanderer gets shit on if they dont willingly fucking die because theyre literally like 19 when a bunch of grown ass adults expect them to walk into a chamber of radiation for The Good Of The Capital or whatever. idk im not saying its not brave or noble or anything for them to do it but i didnt think it was fair for the ending narration to drag the hell out of them for getting scared and not being able to go through with it. i mean in general i dont think pretty much anything that happened regarding the lone wanderer was fair because their DAD started all that shit and they didnt ask to be born. they were raised in a fucking vault, they dont know shit about the wasteland and theyre like 21 at MOST at the end according to the canon timeline and everyones like “do this dangerous thing for us you actual goddamn teenager! we’re like 40 and lived here our whole lives but you can do it right!” and im sitting here like wtf i just left high school and if thats not a metaphor for real life idk what is

My canon OTP: technically me and preston garvey lmao

Non-canon OTP: please let m!lone wanderer and butch kiss im actually,,,, begging,,,,,,,, but also nick/hancock

Most badass character: well for 4 the obvious answer is hancock but as a companion i have to say preston fucking garvey and his god gun because regardless of what canon would imply as a COMPANION prestons never gotten hurt and sometimes ends up finishing fights before i even get there and hancock is a feeble old man with glass bones that needs 3 stimpacks an hour. in new vegas its like. boone TECHNICALLY but surprisingly arcade gannon is like lo key a goddamn beast bc u expect that shit from craig Eats Nails And Never Sleeps Or Smiles sniper copypasta come to life boone but when dr nerd takes out 3 raiders on his own before u even see them its like oh goddamn. but also grandpa bacon terrifies the absolute shit out of me. im not gonna fight him. he got set on fire thrown off a cliff and hes like 70 and i KNOW he could still destroy my whole ass if i got him mad so im not gonna try. idk what that man is made of but im p sure its 50% rage 50% jesus and i just dont want any part of it thanks

Pairing I am not a fan of: i dont like!! any pairing involving the legion! or maxson! im just tired of seeing them and i want them blacklisted from my life! but i also dont like m/f just in general as a personal pref, but esp with like…. legion/f!courier and shit. its got uncomfortable undertones. i dont like m/f!wanderer or m/f!courier or even m/f!sole when its an unnamed player character/intended self insert bc it makes me Dysphoric and feel skeeved out. but ill make an exception for garvey/f!sole if its my sole oc mags

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): theres so many characters that should have gotten more development but im p annoyed at how they like. HINT at pres stuff and then because of todd howard they dont go anywhere with it. im not exactly happy with in general how you dont rly get to talk to your companions that much. and then aside from that these games in general are notorious for giving u REALLY GOOD npcs that u can have 1 conversation with and then its like “ok now fuck off”. like ten of spades, bitter root, and jimmy in westside? like give them!! a sidequest or smthn!!! you cant just make me love a char and tell me to piss off!!! 

Favourite friendship: betsy + ten and m!courier + veronica are wlw/mlm solidarity

[arvoze]

man, this was sent like, nearly 2 weeks ago or w/e, and i completely ignored it bc i didnt have the energy/ability to care (you literally sent these when it was between 1 - 2am my time) but, it was recently brought to my attn that you put both me + lal in your byf (because i.... banned you from a server i guess, and that means lals at fault too?) so.

i guess it’s high time i answer this lmao. maybe you wont even see this. maybe youll vague abt me for the next few weeks and try and make me out to be a bad person, but i dont care lol. anyways this is under a cut bc its pointless drama i guess. ask 2 tag

additionally: this isnt rly meant to act as a callout post. but since u asked on anon (and im pretty sure we’re mutually blocked) i cant really talk about this privately. this is mostly just.. well. answering your question. ive written this little paragraph after i’ve written everything below, so like, idk dude, it happens sometimes, i get rly heated abt shit and then cool down after a while. so this is wild.

edit: i havent read this thru nor do i care about reading it through. are there a bunch of typos? probably. dont care though

i dont rly have the energy to pull up Everything esp because that lke.... requires going thru so many discord messages adn i really just. dont care enough to sift through everything

“but if u dont care why are you writing this” shut up u wanted answers didnt u lol

nyways heres just . some shit lmao

man firstly let’s deal w your post abt my server

+ dont worry! ive got it archived in case u delete it bc who knows what ud do lol. nyways

lets just do some breakin apart on this:

i was lterally shaking at the time and having my OWN panic issues but i guess you dont rly take that into consideration lol?

this is one of the biggest exaggerations like ... you made it sound like the server was some big special place jdfghdkj theres literally 4 mods and 2 of them didnt even talk to you. the other 2 were me and lal

like half of the server isnt even fucken active on the server and the majority of the other half dont even care about unfollowing/blocking u. what a wild assumption. thts the funniest shit 2 me

please you literally sent me 3 asks when it was way too early in the morning 4 me expecting me to reply as if it was possible for me to give u all the reasons in like 10 minutes jesus christ

ths is one of the ugliest posts ive ever seen + this was posted before you were banned frm the server. several ppl in the server have bpd + i was absolutely not willing to have smeone who says this sht abt their illnesses around (re: the whole “not actively in therapy” and shit. fuck off lol)

here’s some other stuff on my list that you might remember:

(kin stuff) being fully aware that my brother wasn’t - and still isn’t - okay with doubles with a specific character, and that you were specifically warned whilst he was offline, and you knew this was the case, yet decided that your best way of explaining something was..... fuck dude, whats the wording you used? “i’d say but some people here aren’t ok with doubles” or some shit which is! literally just as bad! and tht shit has fucked my bro up so severely tht he still fuckn..... thinks abt + the shit uve said In General (shrugging emoji)

heres a fucken wild ride for u: ur the reason he left th server anyways and why the second i banned u i was immediately happy because holy shit i can talk to my bro again bc i could invite him back! to a chat where he doesnt have to deal w someone who causes him constant panic attacks! wowee

lets not forget me expressing my extreme distaste of lying [person] + r.idged.og + ridg.epho.s but u completely ignoring that shit (+ wowie remember when u said lying was yr friend and that you didnt like me venting negatively abt them bc my nasty experiences r somehow less important than ?? tht shit??? lol anyways)

god the entire fucking drama w the lying shit . i cant believe i was on yr side for a while jdfghkj. that whole fiasco was so shitty. nyways thts nothing to do w me its just something that made so many ppl uncomfy

remember when you left the lying chat and then vented to us about shit but then rejoined the lying chat unbeknownst to us + caused shit again (surprise, i know about that)

you, generally, made several people uncomfortable (myself included), and as the owner of the server, i’d much rather kick one person from the server than have several people being uncomfortable. but if that’s an unreasonable thing to do then please, inform me, because that’s news to me.

whilst i dont support alex or alex’s partner in any way, shape or form (before u try and call me a fucken apologist/supporter/whatever lol), the blatant deliberate misgendering of alex’s partner on your byf was extremely shitty of you (which has since been fixed, but yikes).

(kin stuff) pretending to not be a double around lal, knowing he’s not comfortable with doubles (which, maybe you’re not! but given you’re kin w mc.ree + got that in your byf, and don’t have anything abt not follwing if ur x.phos in ur byf...... boyo)

god theres more but im not willing to dig up all the shit + also dont want to ask other ppl about their personal problems bc thats exposing them to a past/experience they probably want to forget about/never revisit

if u found this? congratulations. you got your answers.

if ur gonna vague abt me? go ahead. i dont really see what ive done wrong lmao.

also, re: why i didn’t tell you anything at all,

i was having a panic attack and almost throwing up

i kept trying to find reasons to keep you in the server, because i didn’t want problems to arise

i will literally never talk to ppl abt this kinda shit privately bc i dont want people to feel bad but 2 late

[oflgtfol]

i had a dream last night where like, it was the first day of school so i had all new teachers and my fucking math teacher like, sent us? to the past? but he didnt just send my class he sent like so many people to the past so we wind up? in the '70s... my '70s math teacher (a different one from the present) was like "lets not work, lets go outside and play!" so my '70s math class had like a mix of my current classmates and like, '70s students. we go outside and hes like "ok its this new game called hockey!!" (im pretty sure hockey wasnt invented in the '70s lmao..) but like in middle school hockey was the Only game i enjoyed and was decent at so i was like fuck yeah. all the '70s students had no idea what to do, the game was so disorganized like there were no teams, it was basically me vs this one jock boy. everyone was amazed that i knew what to do so i was like hahha yeah!! i didnt wanna say Im From The Fucking Future so then im in, actual gym class, and all the sudden the fuckingn school starts shaking. i had all my present friends with me and we were all like "is it an earthquake? is it a terrorist attack???" i swear my school in the '70s was so fucking disorganized bc nobody told us to evacuate? so me and my friends were just, trying to find an exit, i wasnt even sure if we were allowed to leave, we had to find some weird ass exit through the gym fucking bathroom because there was no adult telling us what the fuck to do, in fact i think a teacher was leaving in that general direction too and she told us not to be there?? and i was like but we gotta evacuate? like we almost got in trouble for leaving through That Door of all doors. eventually we got out (i really cant even describe what the door was it was like some weird ass retractable wall thing i reallt cannot say what it was but a teacher almost closed it on me on purpose bc it wasnt supposed to be a real exit) and we can see, planes in the distance to the north. theyre dropping, bombs, and the dust has already made the air cloudy as far as across the street from the school. me and my friends are freaking out, we have no idea whats going on, OUR CELL PHONES WONT WORK BECAUSE ITS THE '70S, i just want to fucking Go Home i didnt even want to be sent to the '70s and now i might die here. some teacher (i honestly think she was my math teacher from 7th grade now that i remember her face and voice, but she wasnt any of my actual teachers in the dream) told us it might be a test bc its in the direction of some empty fields. we're all outside and we arent allowed to leave to go home, so its like dark out, the sky is dark brown and red as the sun sets, the clouds are Brown. i guess we're allowed in the school but only in one area because i remember going to the second floor, but it was actually really high quality with like a nice ass carpet and windows and gold decorAtions which, my school Does Not Have. theres people milling about though, mostly adults. im looking for some people i know from the present, particularly my fuckening math teacher so he can send us all back. i cant find him but i find my? old girl scout leader's mom? and apparently she has a twin that i never knew about, but shes only off in the background. i try to talk to my girl scout leader's mom and shes like, not even paying attention. she had a girl in like her 20s right next to her and they were watching the sunset but suddenly it was like still blue skies? I was like "oh yeah because the sunset happens later when youre higher up" like, as if that makes sense (that only happens with considerable height like theyre maybe 20-30ft higher than we were on the ground i dont think it would make the sunset appear like 20 minutes earlier than it had on the ground?) they were impressed with that knowledge but otherwise werent helpful anyway im panicking to the point i dont care. i pull out my phone in front of everyone (no one even notices tho so lmao) and my phone, doesnt even work. like i expected no service and all that but like, everything is malfunctioning. my wallpapers dont display and theres an error message on it instead. i can open my apps but they just, wont display anything. like i opened tumblr and my dashboard didnt show any posts it was just the blue background somehow i get back home. my parents and my brother are the same age instead of being, young (or nonexistent for my brother) however they werent people who got caught in the time travel so idk (bc my parents didnt know anything abt technology from the present). my parents knew nothing about the bomb shit, they didnt even question why i was home so late. i tell them about the hockey shit and all they said was "wow! thats odd that a math teacher would let you all play outside like that" i woke up at this point bc shannen texted me :( also there was a scene (i have no idea where it chronologically fit into my dream but i remember it being there?) where i was looking at my school and like, it even looked different in the '70s. my elementary school is right next to it but theres a big lawn, a fence, and then another big lawn for the kids to play on on the elementary side. but in the '70s that didnt, exist. like my elementary school was in the same spot but there was a part that extended all the way to my high school, and it was so unnecessarily long lmao. it came within like 10 feet of my high school so you could look out the window from one school and see whats happening in the other at that point. some lady was with me, maybe a principal, and she was like "wow! i never noticed how close they are. thats kind of dysfunctional"