#basically things will calm down w time and i just have to have impulse control and act in the best interest of my future self

[faaun]

ok i came up w reasons for why i am currently the way i am

[creacherkeeper]

ooh if ur up for elaborating ur hcs would u be down to expand on kristen's 'unit of cptsd w freckles'? also in the neurodivergence sector she adaine and fig all give me major adhd energy 👀 the bad kids....adhd autistic solidarity incarnate

i LOVE neurodivergence headcanons!! for me personally i hc adaine, riz, and gorgug as autistic, and fig and fabian as adhd (a friend said she sees her tourettes in gorgug which i think is valid too!!!). might type all that up formally at some point

kristen is just ... like yes all the bad kids for sure have gone through trauma, but i think kristens is pretty different in how it took shape. like she does have shitty, unaccepting parents, and the whole queer realization in a homophobic environment, but she also has the religious trauma at having been raised as the chosen one of a cult?? and i think that all just adds up. so for me its hard to get a read on her as autistic or adhd or anything like that because i think the cptsd just really forms a lot of things. like not everyone would agree, but as a long-time disability advocate who literally does this for a living (as a disability coach) i COMPLETELY see cptsd as a form of neurodivergence and think it can be just as influential on someones personality and behavior as anything else

like a lot of things i think you can read in a meta way about how ally plays her in freshman vs sophomore year or dice rolls and things like that, but im trying to just look at what we get in the story

like just looking at some of the categories of diagnosis of cptsd (and keeping in mind that symptoms of trauma frequently show up AFTER the victim is in a safe space and not while theyre still experiencing it):

affect and emotional regulation - shes FAR more outwardly emotional in s2, but also isnt very consistent about how those emotions present. like compare her super chill calm and detached demeanor in the mirror!riz fight versus her completely flipping out and sobbing and needing comfort after seeing kalina for the first time. like they definitely know a lot more by then but i think kalina is way less scary than a literal horror monster demon version of your friend?? also compare her behavior in s1 (mostly controlled and thoughtful with some occasional emotional outbursts) vs her in s2 seeming to have a much harder time with words, organizing her thoughts, communicating, reading other peoples emotions, responding ‘appropriately’, etc (some of which you can read as cognitive/executive functioning issues too)

attachment - has to actively figure her way out around boundaries (with tracker, sandra lynn, jawbone, the other bad kids) in a way that is a little more intensive than a healthy 17 year old

behavioral control - swings from being VERY self controlled and regulated (more than is healthy) to VERY loose with sexual activity (to the point of being inappropriate around others, even adults) and uses drugs, alcohol, and gets tattoos. definitely has some problems with impulse control (like okay the ribbon dancing out of a building was FUNNY but also. kristen ....,, and there are a lot more examples of this too)

self concept - i mean her whole religious journey in s2 kind of reflects this, but i think the best example is her spirit guardians. like the spirit guardians are a reflection of HER OWN ideology and beliefs and yet like?? theyre very critical and dismissive, even of kristen’s own person and choices? and tend to be very emotionally checked out of everything and encourage her to be as well. like a lot of the “sitting back sipping a cortado” persona tends to be reflective of the spirit guardians, but also the “trust nothing believe in nothing” which is indicative of a lot of self doubt and trust issues. and then like, with cassandra, there’s the LITERAL embracing of a lack of identity, of undefined personhood, and a lot of very risky choices in order to embrace doubt and unknowing (i think cassandra’s whole thing is pretty cool but i think it can come from a healthy or unhealthy place depending on the person, not saying which it was for kristen)

i think her not being able to tell where her cleric powers come from, something that like ??? is VERY inherent in the basic basic concept of what clerics are, could definitely be put under the “self concept” category but also may point to some sort of dissociative or depersonalization tendencies

anyway 8) did anyone ask for me to ramble for this long?? is this what yall wanted? woe, cpstd headcanons be upon ye

[bibbykins]

can u give us a glimpse into what arguing w/ the princes would be like? love ur work btw!!

You bet! I actually had something written about this ages ago but never finished it so I’ll paste it here and add some more!

Warnings: 18+ (just like my whole page and all my works are)This is where the toxicity and unhealthiness of these relationships show, manipulation, yelling, lying, mentions of sex, mentions of rough sex, mentions of various sexual acts (cunnilingus, fellatio, exhibition) I beg of you to not put up with any of this shit irl let fiction stay in the fictional world yknow? I always ramble in my fics about this but I figured I should add it here for good measure

Jin:

Where the other boys rarely ever just “argue” and it is either a fight or nothing, you guys just argue sometimes, never rlly fight

This ties back to the fierce honesty policy you have between each other, but you both are so stubborn so arguing does happen

You both usually start by saying snarky things until one of you breaks and says what is really bothering them, which doesn’t take long at all

If you cry, congrats, you automatically won bc Jin not only does not know how to deal with a woman’s tears, he cannot fathom his one true love crying

Although you usually try to continue explaining your reasoning bc you don’t wanna win by crying, you wanna win bc you’re right

Jin, similar to Jimin, respects you a lot, so the other girls seldom ever catch him acting like a clown’

His downfall is just being bad at expressing his feelings bc he thinks you just know, like you read minds or something

Jin usually apologizes by asking what you want after he forfeits his pride so if it’s a gift, he’s on it, sex? say less. 

He usually prefers to pamper you for a night, not even cumming during sex unless you tell him to

You’re the one who threatens the other fellas when they’re disrespecting their s/o, intentionally or not, and boy are they frightened. You rlly have a way with insults

Yoongi:

Bickers with you, but doesn't fight and everyone does not understand how bc he’s so standoffish to everyone else

Bc your relationship has the most public eyes on it, gossip columns are floored when they cannot find flaws or rumors of fights, and most are too intimidated by Yoongi to just make them up

You both read each other like a book, so the only time anything comes up is if you don’t like what you’re reading at that moment and vice versa, then a fight might start but it is shockingly rare

If he makes you cry, the fight is over, he lost. Yes, this is a running theme among the guys bc they are all whipped dummies

Very perceptive of your feelings, so never really worries about fighting with you or you hiding anything from him

You know how to get him to fess up so it's not the worst system of communication (still not healthy in the slightest but that’s the yandere life here)

He doesn't really try to lie to you or hide anything since you're also pretty bonkers so if he destroyed someone’s career bc he thought they looked at funny, you just roll your eyes and tell him he’s silly

You are the one that Jungkook and Taehyung are terrified of (It’s just about all the hyungline gf’s they are rlly scared of)

You’re usually so bubbly and energetic, but if you get pissed off, you’re as frightening if not more frightening than Yoongi

I should add Yoongi prefers to make up by marathon eating you out, at some point, it feels like he’s getting a kick out of it, but you’re in no place to complain tbh

Hoseok:

Not a lot of fighting here tbh bc you are still healing and your talent is in deescalating situations and telling people’s feeling

Your job is literally a behavior analyst so you will just deadass be like, “I can tell you’re getting frustrated to a point where effective communication won’t be possible, so how can I help calm you down?”

Makes him go silent real quick and reevaluate everything he has ever thought or done

For this reason, he just sighs and apologizes, genuinely bc you can absolutely tell when he’s just saying it to shut you up

He is the only one that will allow you to leave (the room, not the house) not that you want to leave the building considering the dangers you know are out there

Once you both cool off, you’ll have him state what he thought about and vice versa

You give advice to all the girls on how to do this, but not all of them are brave enough to try

So you go full mama bear mediator and step in when you feel the need

You genuinely frighten these guys bc you have this innate ability to make them feel dumb as fuck

Namjoon:

No fights rlly but misunderstandings happen that makes Joon go manic

You get frustrated bc he does this instead of just talking to you, but he’s learning little by little

The moment you aren’t smiling or trying to make a light joke with him, fight over, you won, he is worried

Bc he knows if you’re not smiling, you’re almost definitely going to cry and when you cry, he cries

You actually implement Angel’s tips and see some improvement with communication as time goes on

Namjoon’s love language in making up is grand gestures, so he’ll rent out a whole restaurant, or take you on a shopping spree to an art supply store, anything that will bring a smile to your face

You intimidate the other guys when they fight with their darlings bc you keep a smile the whole time you are threatening them and holy fuck is it eerie. You usually try to distract the upset girls post-argument with a craft or fun art facts

Jimin:

What makes the relationship work are your selfish tendencies working in tandem with his more sinister ones, but it can’t always work that way

You both test each other all the time despite agreeing on almost everything because the relationship is not a fight for dominance, but control-control you usually win 

The closest you get to real fighting is rough sex, most of the time you have disagreements that you resolve with conversation

It's the most “healthy” (it’s not all that healthy tbh) thing about the relationship and it blows everyone's minds, but it only happens bc Jimin has always respected you, and he genuinely knows that you don’t need him as much as he needs you

But on the extremely rare occasion there is a fight it is never in front of anyone and all hell breaks loose: screaming, yelling, slamming doors, it all seems like endless hell bc you both are too stubborn to say when you’re wrong

Until you cry

He really can't stand the sight of you crying, bc you rarely ever cry. He sees you as really tough and his whole perception of the world shatters once he realizes he’s the cause of your tears

Making up includes, you guessed it, sex. Like calling into work bc you can’t walk sex (Jimin cries during this sex bc he feels undeserving but by round 2 he stops)

The girls come to you post-argument to rant bc you live to talk shit with them to vent

Taehyung:

Rarely ever fights with you, because he absolutely despises doing so and you typically do what he says without question

But when you do fight, it always ends with both of you crying and hugging

During the argument though, he can say some seriously out of pocket shit, bc he lacks impulse control and you take that shit to hear bc who wouldn’t 

The fights are nightmarish and hard to watch bc at some point it just becomes Taehyung losing his mind while you cower until he realizes how much of an asshole he’s being or until you try to leave mid convo

Bless him if he were to ever make you cry in front of the other MC’s, my guy would be ripped to shreds bc the other girls do not fuck around

Hates to ever be the cause of your tears so you both are very quick to makeup and he can spend up to weeks making up for it

I’m talking gifts, money, food, dates, clothes, he is basically your personal assistant that pays you when he feels bad

The girl’s come to you after an argument for quiet time or some cute embroidery time

Jungkook:

You don't fight often, but when you do it's disastrous bc he is wildly paranoid and you are wildly insecure

You almost always go into a panic attack, fearing he'll leave you and he immediately loses all fight in him and feels like shit

And he is absolutely crushed seeing you hyperventilate or clutch your chest while he's yelling so he just stops like mid yell will just close his mouth and take a deep breath before going to you 

Immediately apologizes when it happens

Usually cries with you while he holds you

Another fella that will get torn to shreds by the other girls if they even catch a whiff of him being anything other than sunshine and rainbows to you rip jungkook tbh

He makes it up to you the same way Taehyung makes it up, by shutting his mouth and doing whatever you want, and giving you whatever you want

When the other girls get into an argument with their guy, they come to you for a hug and some quality time distraction

[skylarmoon71]

E2 Harrison Wells x Reader- Oneshot (Flash)

"Listen to me, you don't have to do this. You aren't a killer. "

You just closed your fist, eyes dark with hatred. The more you squeezed, the harder it was for the criminal in front of you to breathe. Barry took a step forward and you raised your free hand.

"I don't want to hurt you Barry, but I will if I have to. BACK OFF!"

"No! I'm not gonna stand here and watch you throw your life away. I know what it's like (Y/N), to resent someone to the point that you're willing to risk it all." your hands faltered for a second, and the man on the floor groaned. Your lips were quivering.

"H-He killed him Barry..for a stupid watch and some cash. "

"I know, and I'm so sorry (Y/N). " Bit by bit he was inching closer, and you could feel your anger dissipating slowly. You should have known that Barry would be the one to figure it out. After losing your boyfriend to a mugger, you dedicated your life to tracking his killer. 

You worked under Joe at CCPD. You were just an officer. A close call with a meta one night when you were working with Joe had led to the discovery of your own abilities. Shortly after he introduced you to the team. Even with your loss, you felt like you were slowly but surely getting your life back together. Then you heard of another robbery. Similar MO, except this time the individual survived. They were able to identify the perp. It could have been an impulse, but you tracked him down. Took you hours.

Standing in his beat down apartment, all you wanted to do was inflict as much pain as you could. You just wanted the hole that he left in your chest to disappear.

"Please (Y/N)." Barry's eyes were pleading. You finally lowered your hands, and the male being pinned gasped, coughing. Barry moved forward, pulling you into his arms and you stood there, gripping onto his shirt as you bawled your eyes out.

~~~~~

"You saved a lot of people. He's been on the run for weeks. Hurt a lot of innocent people too. Good job kd." You can't even look Joe in the eyes. You keep your head down nodding and he pats your shoulder. This entire situation could have gone completely sideways. All you can do is watch as they take the handcuffed man away. You're standing next to Barry who's doing his best to keep you grounded. As Joe leaves, you look over at Barry. "Thank you." you whisper. If he hadn't brought you from over the edge, it could have been you walking away in cuffs.

Barry knows that no amount of sympathetic words can help, so he just offers a hug. "Anytime (Y/N)."

~One Year Later~

"Guys I could really use a hand here!!" The meta currently trying to break past your barrier was a little more than you could handle at the moment. Between fighting past his metal armor and trying not to become like the unconscious officers around you, it was a struggle. With gritted teeth, you push harder, but he's fighting through pain. Being able to control liquid elements was a nice ability, but for this iron head, it may not have been enough. You were manipulating his water components, but it was just barely holding him off. A normal person would have been out cold by now.

"B-Barry!" On cue he zips by. The meta looks down at the cuffs on his wrist. You grin, because he no longer has the metal to shield him. With a flick of your wrist, his body is thrown back, hitting the wall.

"You know he was bound right." Barry says. You just shrugged. "I know." He shakes his head with a laugh, calling in Joe to round up some reinforcements. Finally, you can relax.

"What took you so long?"

"Well Harry and Cisco were-" you wave your hands.

"Don't bother, I can already guess. " Those two never quit.

"Next time just ignore them." you state walking away.

"Will do!!"

~~~~

"The next time you dipsticks decide to have a fight don't forget their actual people out there that don't wanna get crushed by a psycho metahuman." Cisco and Harry stood still as you basically ripped into them. Most of the time you could care less, but Barry could tell that something about this case must have really agitated you. Storming out the cortex, Barry's eyes followed you. He hadn't seen that look on your face since, well since you lost Calvin.

"Did she seem off to you?" Cisco inquired.

Barry was still zoned out.

"Just give her some time." Barry advised. He wanted nothing more than to help you, but he could tell that right now all you really needed was some space.

~~~~~

Later that afternoon Caitlin and Iris invited you to a well deserved girls night. Fighting metas as well as dealing with regular criminals took a pretty heavy toll on you. So of course you accepted. Knocking on the door, Iris rushed to open the door. The moment she saw your face she was grinning. You barely had time to greet her before she was tugging you inside. You laugh at her excitement. 

"Someone's ready to party." kicking off your shoes, you raised your head. You didn't expect to see the many faces that filled the room. "Uhhhh.." you were positive she'd said girls night over the phone, so why was Cisco, Harry, Joe and Barry here.

"Sorry we set you up, it was Barry's idea.' Iris apologized with a smile.

"Hey!" you can't really be mad. You step forward, and Barry is the first to hug you. Not anticipating it, you pat his back awkwardly. "Y-You okay there Barry?" He's acting a little strange. When he pulls away, all he does is smile, patting your shoulder. "Yeah I'm just...really glad that you're in our lives."

He's certainly being weird, nevertheless, you appreciate his words.

"That's sweet Barry, thank you." He nods.

"Alright let's get this party started!!" Cisco cheers. He's never one to pass up getting drunk.

"I'll make sure Ramon doesn't pass out on your couch Allen." With the both of them you know it's only a matter of time before the bickering begins, and it's sort of comforting.

For the night you all talk, drink and exchange stories. Harry gives some moments where he's had to scare away Jessie's potential boyfriends. Joe states the same when Iris had started high school. You're dying of laughter at one point when he says he flashed his gun to intimidate one of them. The night carries on. Somewhere along the line, you've slipped out to the balcony. You enjoy the company, but right at this moment, you need to be alone. You lean over, eyes staring up at the sky. 

The facade you've been keeping up all day has fallen, and you allow the tears to flow freely. You sniff a couple times. When you hear the door behind you slide close you straighten, wiping at your eyes frantically. 

"I-It's pretty chilly outside. Kind of makes your eyes water. The man standing there, it's not who you'd assume. Harry just watches you for a moment, and you're convinced he can see right through you.

"W-Well I should get inside before they start to worry." you try to bolt.

"Who did you lose?" Then he asks that question. You haven't even fully made it to the door yet, and you're lucky for the curtains that block the view on the other side of the door.

"I've been watching you all night. This morning Ramon was concerned you were acting unusual. I brushed it off, but seeing you tonight confirmed everything. The smiles don't truly reach your eyes. "

You have half a mind to tell him that it's none of his business. Who the hell did he even think he was, profiling you like some kind of criminal. Harry takes another step, and when he looks down, your barrier crumbles instantly. With a shaky hand to your lips, you lean your back against the wall. His eyes convey sympathy, and he takes your hand softly. You sob, and Harry slowly pulls you into his arms. You hold unto him, breaking down right there. It's been such a struggle carrying on all day. Harry is the absolute last person you ever would even think could provide comfort, but you're grateful.

~~~~~~

It takes a while for you to calm down, at one point Barry even comes searching, upon seeing you chatting with Harry, he closes the curtains with a smile. The both of you just sit in silence. You've pulled out a chair, and Harry is right beside you. He doesn't press for any kind of information. You kind of like this.

"His name was Calvin."

Azure eyes move in your direction.

"We were together for three years." You place a hand on your chest, and Harry watches as you reach under the neck of your shirt, pulling out a necklace. There's a ring attached to it. A beautiful diamond right at the center. "The night he was.." your throat tightens. 

"The night I lost him, he was going to propose. They recovered all the items that were stolen from the guy's apartment. Calvin bought it a year before. He was making down payments to afford it. " Your hands grip the ring, and you can feel the tears about to spill again. You swallowed, looking over at Harry. 

"I-I'm really sorry that I yelled at you guys today. I-I was just.."

"You don't have to explain. " He was starting to get the bigger picture. Today was important to you. This is what was needed for you to mourn. He understood, more than you realized. You knew about his past, and now he knows about yours.

"How long does it take for this feeling to go away?"

He wished he could give you an easy answer, but he was the last person to ask about dealing with loss. Tess was the most stable and treasured thing in his life. Then he lost her, shortly after that he almost watched his only daughter get killed. Safe to say he was the worst at trying to move on.

"It never really goes away." he knows that isn't the answer you want.

"But it will get better (Y/N). You have people here that care about you. Family."

They were the reason he no longer looked at the world at people as if they were expendable.

"You'll be fine." He takes your hand when he says it, and the confidence of his assurance. It's exactly what you need.

"Thank you, Harrison."

A brilliant smile.

"You're welcome."

[hurricanery]

all to myself

A/N: This is a quick thing I wrote completely as a result of re-watching season 15 Amelink moments. Kinda a throwback. The next story I post will either be some domestic amelink/scout stuff orrrr a multi-chapter AU featuring amelink as interns together w/ some other original characters. Let me know what you wanna read next! Feedback is always appreciated!

_______

Floating on a high, and I feel ya

Got an ache inside, and I need ya

Ooh, I desperately wanna be lost with you

'Til all of our energy crosses

_______

They slept together. Once. Two weeks ago. Rather impulsively at a work conference.

And Amelia knows it was more than just an impulsive move, or a soon-to-be repressed mistake. God, she doesn’t see it as a mistake.

She’s been thinking about it basically 24/7 since she returned back to Seattle. She doesn’t remember finally being able to fall asleep that night, but she does remember waking up the next morning with a start.

Because something was different. Good different.

She had sat up in the hotel bed, instantly reaching for her own lips, running her fingertips over them, as if she’d actually feel proof of what happened.

And then she had registered that distinct taste on her lips and vaguely in the back of her throat. Kind of like the burning sensation of a kiss you’ll never not think of. It was a bold presence in her morning. And it was so refreshing.

Her heart had clenched as she let the hazy memories resurface.  

If asked whether she anticipated sleeping with Atticus Lincoln on that night, she would’ve burst out into stunned laughter. Because, no. Of course not. Right?

She’d just ended a long-term relationship. She’d been in a bit of a weird place lately. Not totally herself. And probably not ready. So, this definitely wasn’t going to become anything serious.

But somehow, something had changed that night. And in that moment, after a brief argument that had surprisingly ended in a dinner invite, looking into a pair of pleading blue eyes that she wished didn’t mirror her own, she knew what her next move was.

And it was the way he had gazed back at her, that finally pushed her over the edge. Deciding dinner wasn’t truly what she wanted in that moment, she murmured a quick ‘no’ before stepping forward and capturing his soft lips in her own.

She remembers the way he had instantly kissed her back, and the way his breath felt against her own. Her hands went to the buttons on his shirt, and the noise that she had made in the back of her throat, a mix between a whine and a full-fledged moan. As if to say, finally.

She likes to think it was Link who took control then, slipping his tongue into her mouth and pulling his own shirt the rest of the way off. Pushing her toward the bed and lifting her onto it. Pushing down a wall she’d had up for some time now. Making her feel.

Alternative pain relief.

Finally. Feeling.

_______

Two weeks later and Amelia’s still feeling. A lot.

But her mind is clouded mostly with confusion. Because she hasn’t heard anything from Link since that night. And she hopes to god that he doesn’t regret it. But she’d totally understand if he did. She’s the one in a weird place. The one who needs alternative pain relief.

Part of her feels guilty. The inexplicable doubt weighs on her, the fact that she’s basically using him. Just because she needs it, doesn’t mean he does, too. And so Amelia suppresses any urge she has to bring it up; suppresses any urge she has to just jump his bones right then and there, when the two of them are hopping on a private plane to New York for a surgery. Basically forced into each other’s company.

She’ll act cool, calm, collected….all of it.

She’ll disregard the fact that she’s been ‘in a weird place these days,’ because she’s just grateful that she’s feeling, again.

_______

Amelia steps onto the small plane and all of her anxieties about seeing Link again wash away as soon as she locks eyes with him.

He turns to her, from where he has already taken his seat, and awkwardly kind of shrugs, with a sheepish smile on his face.

“Hey, stranger,” she mumbles, in a mock-serious tone, before she realizes she can’t keep up the facade. And she starts laughing. “Long time, no see.”

Link laughs in agreement, and it looks like his shoulders relax a little. Amelia takes her seat across from him, smirking the whole time.

_______

It happens again.

Amelia doesn’t mean for it to happen again, but it does.

And now she’s slipping out of Link’s bed and pulling on his shirt in one swift movement. Her ‘no sleepovers’ policy at the forefront of her mind as she makes her way to the door between their adjoining hotel rooms.

“Wait, how about we order pizza?”

Amelia glances at Link incredulously. “We have a very important surgery early tomorrow. Sleep time.”

“Or room service?” He continues, persistent. “Room service in bed and then we sleep?”

“No,” Amelia laughs. “No sleepovers, remember?”

Link pouts at her, collapsing back against the bed dramatically. “Let’s forget the rules for a night. I’m hungry.”

“Nope!” Amelia states matter-of-factly. “No complications. We both agreed. My life is already complicated enough.” She laughs.

Link sighs again dramatically, accepting defeat.

“Goodnight, Link.” She smirks at him as he lays back against the bed. “See you tomorrow.”

There’s brief silence as she turns around in her doorway, beginning to push the door shut.

“Goodnight, Amelia.”

_______

The following evening, after a successful surgery, Amelia and Link return to their hotel. As they enter the lobby, the receptionist at the front desk waves in their direction. Amelia simply waves back before she realizes that the receptionist is trying to wave her over.

“I’ll go see what’s up. Hold the elevator for me.” Amelia mumbles.

Link presses the button to call the elevator down and watches from across the lobby as Amelia chats briefly with the staff. A minute later, Amelia returns with a weird look on her face.

“What was that about?” Link asks.

“There’s a problem with the rooms,” she explains. She looks riddled with uncertainty. “Well, with my room.”

“Huh?”

“Apparently my hotel room is reserved for another guest starting early tomorrow. They offered to upgrade me starting tonight.”

Link frowns.

“I didn’t want to have to move all my luggage to another floor so….” She pauses briefly as they step onto the elevator. The next sentence comes out in a nervous mumble. “I said we only needed one room.”

Link slowly breaks out into a smile. “We can work with that,” He says calmly. “Good idea to not have to move your stuff.”

The elevator door opens to their floor and Amelia just stands there for a second, watching Link exit.

She swears she can hear him laughing at her sudden awkwardness as he makes his way down the hallway.

Once Amelia gets all of her luggage settled into Link’s room, she returns to the lobby briefly to return the key card to her previous room.

She re-enters their now shared hotel room and watches as Link sighs tiredly, leaning toward the bed before dramatically sprawling out on it.

Amelia laughs loudly at his action. “You were great today.” She sits on the chair in the corner to remove her ankle boots and jacket. “In surgery I mean.”

“As were you.” Link responds, picking his head up to glance at her. “Very few people in this world can do what you did today.”

Amelia smiles sheepishly at the wholeheartedness of his words, then suddenly stands up.

“I’m gonna shower.” She states, “I’ll just be a few.”

Link tries not to pass out on top of the covers before she returns. He can hear her humming slightly to herself from inside the bathroom, and Link stifles the urge to mock her in any way.

Link changes into some sweatpants and a t-shirt before he hears the water turn off.

“Ah, shit,” he hears Amelia hiss through the thin walls.

“Amelia?” he calls, almost too quickly, cursing himself for being too attentive.

There’s a moment of silence.

“Uh, yeah? Yeah, Hi. Everything’s cool in here. Yep. Don’t worry.” And then she laughs.

“Uhhhh,” he draws out his response. “You sure you’re alright?”

“Yeah, I’m just…..clumsy. Dammit.” She laughs again breathlessly. “I, uh. I cut my shin…. shaving….I thought it stopped bleeding, but…”

Silence falls between them again and Amelia can’t help but laugh at the situation she’s gotten herself in.

“Do you need my help?”

“Uh, no. I don’t think so.” She knows she doesn’t sound convincing.

“…Amelia?”

“Actually, do you have a bandaid? …..Or like six?”

There’s another pause before Amelia can hear some shuffling around in the other room.

“There’s got to be a first aid kit in here somewhere.” Link responds, making his way to the closet “Got it!”

He walks over to the bathroom but pauses with his hand on the door knob. “Should I come in?”

“Yeah, yeah. Please.” Comes a muffled reply.

Link opens the door and is met with an unexpected sight. Not entirely sure what to expect, but Amelia, wrapped up in a white towel, sitting on the lid of the closed toilet seat, leg propped up on the edge of the bathtub, was not it.

He bursts out laughing.

“This is not funny!” But she’s laughing, too. And rolling her eyes at him. “I need those bandages!”

“Wait, no. Amelia. You can’t just put a bandaid on there. You’re bleeding, like, a lot.” He kneels down next to her, and Amelia instinctively pulls her towel tighter underneath her arms. Link gives her a look, as if to say, 'It’s not like I haven’t seen it all before. Now please let me assess your injury.’

And Amelia just relaxes her shoulders, nodding to herself and to him.

“And you’re soaking wet, no bandaid is gonna stay on your skin like this,” he mutters, pushing the ropes of her wet hair back past her shoulders, in hopes that it would help her dry faster.

He grabs a roll of toilet paper from under the sink and goes to work at stopping the bleeding, holding it there for a while until he thinks it’s okay to wrap up.

“Now six bandaids seems a little excessive there, Amelia. How about two?”

“I think I deserve at least four,” she bargains, endearing smirk on her face.

“Fine,” Link gives in, gently placing each bandaid on her shin one at a time. “There. Good as new,” he smiles, patting her leg.

Amelia rolls her eyes, blushing. “Thanks.”

And then Link stands, not sure what to do with himself now.

“I’m going to change now,” Amelia laughs.

And now Link’s blushing. “Yeah, yep. I’ll get out of your way,” he mumbles, exiting the tiny bathroom.

_______

When Amelia enters the room a few minutes later in an oversized t-shirt, which is what she normally wears to bed, she swears she sees Link do a double take. He’s now dressed in sweats standing near his open luggage in the opposite corner of the room. His stare lingers for a second too long and Amelia looks down at herself. She doesn’t understand the sudden awkwardness between them. But the air feels different.

“I know. Sorry, this is all I have,” she mumbles. “And I thought I’d have my own room tonight so-”

“What? No, you’re fine,” Link responds quickly.

She grins at him, clearly amused by him.

Link shakes his head at himself and turns to grab a couple pillows off of the bed, tossing them on to the floor.

“What are you doing?” Amelia interrupts him.

“Making a bed for myself on the floor?” It comes out as a question. “No sleepovers, remember?” He laughs, knowingly.

Amelia looks stunned, but only for a moment.

“No you’re not,” Amelia laughs. “Just get in here,” she adds, as she crawls under the covers on one side of the bed.

Link gratefully tosses the pillows back, getting into bed beside Amelia, sitting against the headboard as he pulls on the covers.

He reaches across and switches off the light on his bedside table, and the whole room goes dark. Amelia rolls onto her side and listens to Link shuffle around until he gets comfortable.

“Goodnight, Link. Thanks again for today,” Amelia whispers in his general direction, not really sure of his current position.

“'Night, Amelia.” Amelia is surprised by the vicinity of his voice, closer than she expected.

A couple minutes later and Amelia needs to readjust herself. She gasps when her face collides with something surprisingly hard. She reaches out her hand and quickly realizes she’s touching Link’s chest, now with her hand, and leaning against him with her face pressed up to it.

“Oops,” she mutters, and Link laughs under his breath.

But she doesn’t move away.

And Link takes the initiative of pulling her in closer at her hips, and then keeping his hands there, squeezing at her waist.

“Amelia, I-”

“Link-”

They both pause. And Link squeezes at her waist again, encouraging her to talk first.

She clears her throat. “Link, I-” She pauses again, working herself up to what she wants to say.

Their eyes are adjusting to the light it seems, and Amelia can just make out Link’s eyes, staring intently back at her. Maybe he can sense her worry.

“It doesn’t have to mean anything,” Link offers.

Amelia nods. “Right,” she mumbles quietly.

Their faces are just inches apart. And Amelia knows she wants to kiss him. She wants to have him again. She wants to keep feeling. Keep falling.

Maybe she wants the complications.

Maybe she just wants to kiss him.

So she does. And Link shivers as her lips gently brush his. Amelia feels Link move one of his hands up in response, so that it’s cupping her cheek, while the other remains on her hip.

Link leans forwards and presses his lips against Amelia’s. He opens his mouth to her and Amelia does the same, catching his top lip between hers. It’s slow, and it’s lovely. And this time it’s not impulsive.

But it still feels so right.

They pull apart, smiling through the darkness. And Amelia rolls over so that her back lines up against Link’s front. His arm goes possessively around her waist, pulling her in closer than they’ve ever been.

Amelia can feel her breath start to even out, as well as hear Link’s. Both on the verge of sleep. She just barely whispers into the quiet of the room, “I kind of like sleepovers."

_______

And I want you all to myself

Just keep me caught in your spell

You stop my breathing, but keep my heart breathing

You're bringing me outta hell

Oh, I want you all to myself

[akitohsworld]

Future Family- Scenarios/Children segment

Because I can, and I want to. (Even tho I myself do not want children :) )

And because this is a poly household, we having some cute family dynamics here.

You

Mammon:

Morgan (10 years old)

Personality; loud, mischievous, greedy (like a crow, loves shiny things), a bit of a tsundere, brutal/savage tendencies like You, impulsive, honest, tries to be responsible as the oldest

Appearance; Mammon's eyes, Your hair (long), mixed skin, small fang on the right side, birth marks on her chest

Noted: Morgan can pick locks and successfully use simple illusion spells, is also very fast

Beelzebub:

Alexander (6 years old, twin)

Personality; not quiet/not as loud as Morgan tho, glutton (eats more than the average child, but not extreme), extroverted/social child, throws tantrums when hungry or lonely (meaning he is not w/his twin), follows his twin's lead normally

Appearance; Your hair, Beel's eyes, fair skinned, very subtly pointed ears, birth mark on his left arm

Emma (6 years old, twin)

Personality; relatively quiet, glutton (like her twin), introverted/shy child, calculating/ let's others do the work, doesn't get in trouble, does not throw tantrums but begins to silently cry when hungry or lonely (not with her twin)

Appearance; (see Alexander/ her twin), longer hair, birth mark on arm (right side)

Noted: the twins can communicate on a telepathic level (actively, conversations), which is the reason why they randomly start fights w/each other or are quiet for longer periods of time

Étienne (approx. 1 year old)

Personality; He is a very cute happy/energetic baby, and a glutton/throws tantrums when hungry (what did u expect lol, he a bb)

Appearance; Beel's hair, Your eyes, fair skin, chubby cheeks, very subtly pointed ears

Noted: strong for a baby, can lift a table like it's nothing

Me

Lucifer:

Lucius (8 years old)

Appearance; basically a small Lucifer, wavy hair, bushier brows, mole on his forehead (where Lucifer's mark forms when he transforms)

Personality; arrogant/prideful like papa, loves to prank Morgan, articulates himself like an adult due to his genius, troublemaker for attention from papa mostly (=DEFINETLY the devil's spawn)

Noted: Lucius can use destructive magic, is very intelligent and can use simple teleportation magic (as in short distances at a time)

Satan:

Xavier (3 years old)

Personality; very quiet/almost mute happy child, whispers in ppls ears when he wants something or just stares/gesticulates until they get the hint, smart bb, throws extreme temper tantrums when mildly inconvenienced or in any state of distress (only Satan/Me/Sirius (from a safe range) can calm him down)

Appearance; My hair, Satan's eyes, mixed skin, small fangs, freckles, birth marks on his back

Noted: Xavier cannot control his magic, which is why temper tantrums are like a battlefield/natural disaster to everyone around him, things break constantly, but he is a very gentle child

Simeon:

Sirius (approx. 1-2 years old)

Personality; very cute happy baby, loves to stare into Lucifer/Diavolo's eyes (?)

Appearance; Simeon's eyes/skin/hair, My nose/lips, chubby cheeks, freckles on his ears

Noted: Sirius radiates a holy light, having a calming effect on everyone around him

[grifalinas]

Batter Up (working title) (Chapter 5)

-/-

Flint took Radley with him to help bring back lunch, and while they waited for their orders, he finally calmed down enough to actually talk.

“You knew about Deacon, didn’t you,” he asked.

“I knew he was lying about his age,” Radley said. “He was at school with me, he graduated last summer. He used to give me a hard time.”

“That why you were fighting?”

Radley nodded, a little embarrassed. “It felt like a chance to finally get my own back, so I thought I’d try needling him a bit. I wasn’t expecting him to swing on me.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I wasn’t kidding, you know, I take responsibility for us fighting.”

“Yeah, well.” Flint gave him a sour look. “I don’t like him lying about being able to bake. That’s what I need him for.”

“Not really.” Radley gestured vaguely at himself. “You taught me all your recipes since I was a toddler, I could make them blindfolded, and by the time school lets back in you’ll be able to hire someone else. Demand probably won’t be super high after the first week we’re open, and if it is, you’ll be able to afford more employees anyway.”

“All the more reason to fire him, then.” He huffed a stray lock of hair out of his eyes, then huffed again and slipped a sequined scrunchy from his wrist to pull it all back with a grumble. “What do I need him for when I’ve got you?”

“He can run the front and be an extra set of hands, since Mr. Bassington can’t do any heavy lifting and won’t let Eddie. Actually I feel like Deacon will really thrive if you put him doing heavy lifting.”

“I have you to do my heavy lifting.”

“I’m still a minor. I’m pretty sure those liabilities apply to me, too, and Mr. Bassington just looked the other way. But he’s not going to for very long.”

Flint leaned back in his chair with a groan. “What in the world has Raphael gotten me into? That man is way too controlling.”

“He’s doing his job.”

Flint let out a frustrated little growl. “Changed your tune, have you?”

“He makes a better second impression. Things have gone way smoother with him organizing everything. And he puts his money where his mouth is when it comes to protecting his employees. He isn’t just worried about legal issues, he really does try to protect the people under him.”

There was a long silence, and Radley added, a little hesitantly, “You looked like you were about to start swinging on Deacon earlier.”

“I wanted to,” Flint admitted. “I like to think I wouldn’t have…” He shook his head. “But there’s no way for Sam to have known one way or another.”

There was another long silence, Flint mulling over the Deacon situation while Radley scrolled social media in an idle sort of way. Finally Flint sighed and slumped, a little defeated.

“Guess I owe the kid an apology,” he said. “And Sammy, too…”

-/-

Samuel felt it might help cool Flint’s temper a little if the kitchen was cleaned up by the time he got back, so he set Deacon and Eddie to do that while he went back to supervising the work crew and getting everything else done.

While Radley and Deacon appeared to have declared each other public enemy number one, Deacon seemed to have no such animosity for Eddie, though the two had interacted little thus far. Eddie seemed intent on making up for this discrepancy now that they were working on a task together, though.

“-and Mr. Bassington says he’s going to introduce me to Rosie and we’re going to be best friends so I’m trying to decide what things I like that he didn’t mention her liking that I should try to introduce her to and I’m thinking of seeing if she listens to Angel DJ on the radio because that’s my favorite radio show and if she gets into music through Angel DJ then we can get into music on the same path instead of both of us discovering stuff, not that that isn’t fun but it’s really fun to find stuff together, me and Radley used to get into stuff through Angel DJ together all the time but then he stopped really caring much about getting into music except as something fun to play while you do other stuff and I like music as something that exists in its own right and should be experienced by itself too and Radley doesn’t like looking up stuff about the artists like how what I do so he’s not fun but I bet maybe I hope that Rosie will be into music like how what I’m into music so we can be into music together.”

Deacon gave her a second to make sure that was actually the end of the sentence and poked his head out of the oven he was cleaning to ask, “What’s Angel DJ?”

“It’s a radio show! Angel is just some guy, he broadcasts from his apartment and he isn’t tied to any specific radio station so he can just play whatever he likes, so he just plays stuff he’s into. He’s been on a bit of an eighties rock kick lately, and he’s playing a lot of Queen stuff so I’ve been really getting into them, I was watching videos of their performances on the internet and they’re SO cool.”

Deacon laughed. “No arguments there. I learned to play on Queen songs.”

“You play?” She lit up. “What do you play?! I don’t play anything, I kinda wouldn’t mind learning but I can’t even pick anything because I hear a song and I think ‘boy it’d be fun to play that I bet’ but there’s so many different parts that go into it that I just end up getting bogged down. What do you play? Guitar? Drums? Keys?”

“Uh… well I main bass, but I can do electric…” He rocked back on his heels to tick off on his fingers. “...Mother made me learn piano and violin so I can do keys and violin, and I was percussion ensemble in high school so most basic percussion, though I’m not great at drums, and I sing.”

Eddie stared at him with stars in her eyes and squeaked out, “That’s so cool~”

He opened his mouth to say he wouldn’t mind playing for her sometime, if she was into that, and was interrupted by the return of Flint and Radley. He clammed up, returning to the oven without a word, leaving Eddie to go help get the food unpacked and call the crew in. He listened to her chattering about how Deacon could play and liked Queen and wasn’t that SO cool?, and stilled to listen to their response.

“You don’t think it’s cool that I like Queen,” Radley said.

“That’s because you just like listening to them. Deacon learned to play on Queen songs.”

“You play?” Flint asked, when Deacon finally emerged from the oven to join them for lunch.

“He mains bass!” Eddie chirped before Deacon could answer.

“I like music,” he said. “It’s a good distraction.” There was a beat, and, seeing the opening, he added, “Sometimes I play with the house band next door, when one of their permanent musicians can’t make it. You should come hear me play sometime.”

Eddie lit up again. “Oh, can we? Can we, Uncle Flint? Please? Can’t we? Please can we?”

“We’ll… see,” he said, a little uncomfortable. “I think taking you kids into a bar is one of those things your old man would kick my ass for.”

Eddie deflated like a three month old birthday balloon. “I’m never going to be old enough to do anything fun.”

“And once you are you’re going to be carded for years,” Flint agreed, reaching over to ruffle her hair. “Sorry, kiddo, that’s just how it is.”

This got a huff, and she batted his hands away before turning to pout at her lunch.

“Sorry,” Deacon said, shuffling a little. “I wasn’t thinking about the age thing, I guess…”

-/-

After lunch, once everyone had gotten back to work, Flint decided to talk to Samuel first. His partner was guiding two of their contractors through putting up the menu boards; Flint took hold of his arm to get his attention, and startled back when Samuel jerked his arm back as if Flint’s touch had burned him.

“Sorry-” they both attempted at the same time, and Flint shook his head before jerking his head toward the office. “Can we talk?”

Samuel paused, and looked to the contractors, but they seemed to have the menu boards under control so he nodded and the two headed back to the office.

“I’m sorry,” Samuel began, before Flint could say anything. “I’m- sensitive to touch sometimes.”

Flint waved that away as unimportant. “I wanted to talk to you about earlier. I owe you an apology, and a thank you.”

“I don’t think I’m the one you owe an apology to.”

“I know. The kid’ll get one in a little while, I just want to get my thoughts in order before I talk to him.”

He sat down in his chair, and Samuel followed suit with a nod of approval. “Smart call.”

“Yeah, turns out I got a couple of braincells kicking around in here.” He cracked a lopsided smirk and then shook his head. “Anyway. I also wanted to thank you. I can’t say for sure that I wasn’t going to swing on the kid, even if I’d like to think I wouldn’t, but I can say for sure if I had you would have stopped me. I appreciate that.”

Samuel opened his mouth to say something, then shut it and shrugged. “We have a responsibility to protect the people we employ, and that includes from each other. I take that seriously.”

“Not a lot of people do.” He leaned his chair back with a sigh. “I wonder if that’s why Raphael sent you to me? She knows I got a temper. I’m a little impulsive, too. And I don’t always think things through…”

“To protect your employees from you? I doubt that. She seemed very invested in your success, and I don’t think she would be if she thought you were the sort to abuse your employees.”

“Not so much that, just someone to curb my impulses when they might have collateral damage.”

“Ah, right. That makes more sense.”

Flint watched him for another quiet moment, taking a few seconds to enjoy his rigid, perfectly controlled posture that did nothing to diminish the amount of him there was- here was a man who had never been taught to take up less space, though paradoxically his presence seemed to invite others into the space he was already occupying. Flint was struck with a bizarre desire to press into his side, enjoy his warmth while they shared… something, anything, it didn’t matter.

He shook the thought away.

“So if she sent you to keep me in line, what did she mean for you to get out of it? Think maybe she wants me to loosen you up?”

“Given she’s applied the words ‘tightly wound’ to me more than a few times in our friendship, I wouldn’t be surprised.”

“You ever think Raph secretly wants to produce a sitcom? That’d explain all the odd couple situations she’s always setting up.”

Samuel chuckled softly at that, and Flint suddenly felt as if he’d been shot through the throat.

He must be staring, because Samuel was giving him a confused look. “Everything okay?”

“Wh-? Oh, yeah. Fine. Just didn’t know you were capable of laughing, that’s all.”

“Maybe if you didn’t run off every time your niece starts talking…”

Flint let out a startled bark of laughter at that. “Yeah? Try living with her, pal. I need a break sometimes, you know. Your girl a chatterbox too?”

“No, she’s very quiet. You’d hardly know she was there half the time.”

“When are you bringing her around? Eddie’s not going to stop pestering yout about it until you do.”

Another of those laughs that made Flint feel like curling his toes up. “To be honest, I’m hoping I can get some of the anticipation to wear off. Rosie is so wonderful but Eddie’s hopes are so high.”

“You’ll never do that. Eddie doesn’t curb her enthusiasm, she just gets more tightly wound up until she finally experiences the thing she’s excited about. We took her to an amusement park to see this singer she was into once and she got so excited she threw up. Keep putting it off and you’re just perpetuating the problem.”

“Hmm.” Samuel seemed a little put out by that, and stroked his beard thoughtfully. “I suppose I could have Theresa drop her off tomorrow? I’m sure she’ll be interested in seeing what we’ve got going on here anyway. She’s very nosy, though she’ll never admit that.”

Flint grinned. “Sounds like a plan!”

-/-

Unfortunately, after his chat with Samuel, Flint had to bite the bullet and talk to Deacon. He didn’t want to. He was still furious with the kid, still wouldn’t really mind just tossing him out and letting him be someone else’s problem.

But whatever he felt about Deacon’s choices, he had behaved far worse, and if he wanted to be the sort of man his kids could look up to, he had to be the sort of man that owned up when he misstepped. So he told Samuel to send the kid in, and took a seat behind his desk and tried not to look like he was sulking too hard over having to apologize.

Deacon slouched in like a spooked animal, like he fully expected Flint to start yelling at him again and, oof, that was fair. Suddenly apologizing felt a lot more doable and a lot more important.

“Siddown, kid, I’m not gonna bite you,” Flint said, waving vaguely at the second desk chair that Samuel usually occupied. “I just wanna talk. And I owe you an apology. I shouldn’t have blown up like that.”

Deacon shrugged, like that didn’t factor to him, and said, in a rushed sort of way, “I’m not sorry about lying. Everyone lies on their resume and they even advise that.”

“They also advise learning how to fake the thing you’re saying you can do,” Flint said. “But that wasn’t really the issue, and you and I both know it.”

An uncomfortable silence descended. Deacon shifted a little in his seat, and said, “It’s cause of the help comment, isn’t it?”

Flint nodded. “I got my recipes from my ma,” he said. “She was an amazing cook, and an even better baker. She taught me and my si- brother coming up, but I was the one who really took to it.” He was silent for a long moment, thinking back to those days with his mother, explaining how every aspect of the recipe worked with every other aspect of the recipe, how to know if the process was working and how to figure out what was missing when it was.

Then he shook his head, dispelling the memory, and went on.

“Ma was a personal chef, she cooked for a lot of wealthy families. Made sure they always had a hot meal waiting without any effort on their part. You know how much thanks she got for it?”

Deacon was shrinking in his chair now, the full realization of what he’d implied hitting him. “‘M sorry,” he mumbled. “I didn’t mean…”

Flint gave him a few more seconds of discomfort before saying, “You should be. That’s the kinda toxic shit you gotta start unlearning now you’re on your own. There’s people out there without a tenth of what you’ve been handed that are worth ten times that, and you’re gonna be surrounded by them now. But. That don’t mean I gotta treat you like that. You’ll never learn like that.”

He leaned back in his chair, waiting in case Deacon had anything to put in, but the kid just stayed staring at the floor. Flint wondered what was going through his head, what he was thinking. If he was taking in what Flint was getting at, or just writing him off as some angry chef’s boy.

“As for your future here… I’ve handed you over to Sammy. Not just because you pissed me off, but also that. I don’t trust my temper enough to be directly in charge of you. But you still answer to both of us. I’m still your boss; Sam is just your direct supervisor.”

Deacon nodded, still staring down at the floor. Flint squinted at him, wondering where all of his fight had gone.

Hmm.

“Hey, kid. Why’d your old man cut you off? What was the decision you made that offended him?”

And, oh, there it was. Deacon bristled up like a rooster with a temper and said, “I don’t think that’s any of your business.”

“There it is. Knew you were in there somewhere. All right, go on, get back to work. Go on.”

He shooed him away; Deacon slouched out in a hurry, before Flint could start Talking To Him again.

-/-

[jungxk]

// rant

i'm jus so heartbroken rn i've been crying for the past hour i jus need to put my feelings out there, i hope it's ok w you.

my mum wakes up today and jus starts berating me bc i didnt put washed dishes into the cabinets & the kitchen looked messy for her. i'm supposed to do it bc there's nothing else i actually do but yesterday i had woken up in the evening nd they called me to pray straight away so i totally forgot about it (coupled w the fact that i dont like doing it either cuz there's always sm dishes nd it's such a hassle). she jus started scolding me senseless nd im someone who doesnt get mad easily, even if i do i tend to stay quiet bc i dont like conflict & angry emotions are ugly. but i couldnt stop it today? she kept calling me selfish nd she's been calling me that the past few days as well bc i never help out w chores or anything. she's always asking me "what do u do for this family" or "what do u do in this house" every single time nd ofc i cant say shit bc i dont. i'm doing uni online nd it's really not that easy but bc i dont talk to my family like at all, they think i'm all good. the other day i pissed them off nd my parents straight up said "why do we need to pay for ur uni ure not doing anything anyway" & i jus... i didnt even know if i even deserve to feel sad over it. they were asking me what i wanna do after uni as if im not just in my first year & when i said im not sure they got so mad and my mum purposely said "just marry her off" to push my buttons into giving them an answer. they keep saying i'm pushing them into being the worst and saying the worst to me but how is that fair? they're parents? adults? i'm jus 20 & i can control my emotions? but today really jus pushed me she got so mad at me for the littlest things nd i jus exploded. I asked her why she's mad and she's like cuz of the kitchen bla bla bla nd it got so frustrating i told her it's not my problem nd i jus wont ever eat again since all the unwashed dishes piling is my fault. nd then she got mad at me for that and scolded me. I hate being touched but mostly i hate being hit. imagine getting hit at 20 years old bc my mother is too emotionally unstable that she cant take a few seconds by herself to calm her anger down. I hate it. nd bc i said it's not my problem she came nd told me "yea it won't be ur problem when i die too! i'll make sure when i do, u never come see me." jus... what kind of parent says that? i'm so careful w what i say & i slip sometimes bc i'm human but how can a mother say that? she doesnt know anything about me. she doesn't know i dont like being hit, she doesnt know i dont like it when ppl act impulsively on emotions. sometimes i feel like i really am the problem nd that i'm really selfish. spending shit ton of money to get me to study, maybe i am selfish. i dont mind it. i know myself well enough to hate things about myself. but to have parents who barely know me as a person rather than a daughter, getting this much mad at me for smthn so simple jus makes me so sad. bc i was doing the task when she asked. she does things like this then wonders why i cant ever talk to her. entire family thinks i'm immature bc i behave exactly how they treat me. 20 years. I never ask for much. but it's starting to feel like asking to study in the uk was my greatest downfall. it feels like i dont deserve this. every day i'm itching to get away, to live alone bc they've made me feel like i can never work well in groups. it's always somehow my fault as if they havent been invalidating me nd my feelings since birth.

nd i can never tell them all these bc i'm never confident in them. i'm never confident in whether i would be accepted nd comforted without ridicule or scolding. my brother & father tell me it's like that, that jus bc i may get a scolding shouldn't stop me from being open. but what kind of stupidity is that? my mother who makes me feel like the world is ending when i accidentally break smthn, that it wasn't an accident but rather it's me nd that i jus cant do a good job— where is the comfort i can ever find coming to her w a problem?

nd bc of that we're not close. bc of that she's closer to my cousins & everyone else really. they've never concerned themselves to talking about family issues w me but when i dont know, they shame me, saying i never bother to ask— how would i know when to ask? should they be telling me when there's smthn going on?

this makes the concept of family so repelling for me. there is inherently no reason to ever have a child that isnt selfish or self fulfilling. what they do as parents is to make them feel as important nd respected as they expect from the child. but it's never like that w south asians. emotions dont exist if ure the child nd apparently getting mad is a norm nd shouldn't stop u from being emotional w someone.

at times i tell myself that i should pay back every penny my parents spent on me. bc sometimes it feels like it's being used to make me act or feel a certain way. i dont wanna feel this way. theyre my parents, i know theyre good people. but i'm so hurt by the things going on nd the things from the past. my mother invalidates me sm. she more or less kinda blamed me for feeling useless and depressed last year. my brother was telling her to go easy on me nd she got so mad & frustrated bc she didnt know what she was doing wrong. "if she feels so useless why doesnt she do anything about it?" like that was such a golden chance for her to have comforted me nd i couldve opened up? but she ruined it nd hurt me again.

last year i lived w her alone nd my dad was in our home country. I was having some troubles w him gone but i dont call or text bc... it always felt like a drag. it never felt like a conversation nd the only time it did was when i complained to him about my mum. so much shit happened between my mum and i & this person advised me to jus write some of my feelings to her. so i wrote her a long letter nd i included saying how not having my dad was hard on me too. flash forward im in my home country & w my dad. i know nobody here bc i didnt grow up here. i'm doing online uni & basically have to stay indoors cuz of covid. she brings that letter up when she was to berate me nd it jus feels so uncomfortable for me? like ok my actions dont line up but i wrote that cuz i was looking for comfort nd understanding. if i knew it was going to be held against me, i would not have done it? "u said it was so hard for u without him, so what do u even do for him here now?"— what can i do? i'm just 20 nd the situation im in is not normal? i'm grateful to be w my dad again but what can i do? &it always freaking comes down to house chores. i try my best. when our maid doesnt come i do my best w my tasks. i know it's not enough but i jus... i dont even know. ig that part of me is selfish nd lazy.

it's so suffocating here. all my feelings are bottled up nd im so scared what that would do to me in the future. but at least i know i'm too selfish to ever spend the rest of my life w someone.

sorry for the long rant. i hope this didnt ruin ur mood or anything i jus need an outlet nd ur blog jus feels so comforting nd welcoming. thank u for listening to me nd my feelings. God bless u really kssjdjsj

i’m rlly sorry this is happening to you bby. idk what race u are but this sounds so much like that asian mentality where emotions are black and white and comfort in any way is out of the question. ur still rlly young tho so ur relationship with ur parents has room to improve i promise. i think it’s rlly important for u to move out whenever u can tho bc that’s what rlly improves the relationship. having said this i do think the way your mum talks to u/treats u is emotionally and mentally abusive so whether you want to uphold that tie with her in the future is ur choice i just rlly hope u get somewhere safe and away from ur family soon x

[kozukenkitten]

could I have a male haikyuu matchup if thats okay? I'm 5'5, female (straight), taurus,esfp, have long dark brown hair w the front half of my right side dyed white, light green eyes & tanned skin! I love working out & im a foodie! I'm super bubbly, chaotic & loud! I'm naturally really flirty and my love language is physical touch. I'm stubborn & impulsive, love tiktok/meme humour & love laughing. I love naps & rain/storms. I'm confident, bold and v emotional! I'm also a night owl & I'm v playful!

I matched you with Miya Osamu!

You two would get along so well, no joke.

Osamu is pretty calm and laid back, so he'd be a good foil to your bubbly personality. You balance each other out nicely. You share a lot of fun adventures together, but Osamu makes sure you never do anything too outrageous, at least not without thinking it through first.

Osamu is no stranger to dying hair, seeing as he dyed his hair in high school, so he would absolutely be down to help you re-bleach/dye your hair whenever you needed it done.

You two would have a blast working out together and going out to try new restaurants all the time. (Not to mention, he'll absolutely cook for you all the time. His onigiri especially are to die for, if you couldn't guess that by the fact he runs an onigiri shop.) You two are always searching for new places to try, though, and you may or may not want to make it a personal goal to find him a favorite food. If you cook something good for him, though? That might be the thing that becomes his favorite food, because food cooked with love for the people you love is the best tasting food of all.

Osamu would find your confidence and boldness refreshing, and he would adore your laugh. (10/10 his dry sense of humor is great, he tries to come up with quality jokes just to hear you laugh. Usually, they're at Atsumu's expense, but sometimes they're just based in randomness.)

Only warning: when he's pissed, he loses any and all filters. He will curse, he will yell, he will make it damn well known how much he wants to wreck someone's shit. He'll never intentionally target his frustrations at you, but it still may happen once or twice, because he's still learning to control his temper. Your presence alone helps, but he's still got a lot of issues he's dealing with. (Basically, don't let him walk all over you when he's pissed. If he's an ass to you, tell him so, and let it be known he needs to calm his ass down.)

Osamu is definitely the subtly jealous type. He's protective of you, and wants everyone to know you're under his protection. Nobody messes with his girlfriend. He'll snake his arms around your waist whenever possible and pull you close. He will shower you with physical affection, and he will 100% leave hickeys EVERYWHERE if you let him, but if you're not cool with that, just tell him so, and he'll find another way to make sure people know he's staked his claim on you. (Likely with some sort of ornate, elegant jewelry or something of that sort.)

[mythicvls]

          WHAT’S CRACK’A’LACKIN Y'ALL ?!?!  my name’s sun  AND  i  live in the cst time zone. ( T E X A S  BBY 🤠 )  i hope ya’ll are all having a good day, afternoon, night !! whatever time it may be where you are out there in the WORLD. sorry i’m a bit late but i’m super excited to get this show on a roll. <3333  . i suck at intros, so pls bear with me.,  buuuuut !! i’ll be introducing, brianna and leo . one is your crazy inventor who works in the forge, and the other is your uptight hero who is obsessed with doing everything by the book. if you wanna know more about them, check out what’s below !!  like this and i’ll go to your messages to spam u with love. THANKS  . 

♡    ——    MEET  BRIANNA   !!

[  PARK CHAEYOUNG, SHE/HER, CISFEMALE  ]  —  [  BRIANNA  BANG  ]  is a child of  [ HEPHAESTUS ]  with the power of  [  TECHNOKINESIS & ENHANCED CRAFTING  ] .  they were born in  [ 1997 ]  and have been in nemean lion since  [ 2013 ] .  with the change, they  [ HAVE GRADUATED FROM ]  the  [ TECHNOLOGY ]  role which makes sense since they’re usually  [ CREATING NEW GADGETS & GETTING OTHERS TO TEST THEM OUT ]

(  ABOUT PAGE  )

its ya girl , brianna bora bang !! aka bree !! daughter of hephaestus and one of the smiths who works in the forge .

growing up, bree’s childhood was relatively calm and uneventful. she was raised by her single-mother, who worked as a mechanic and though they didn’t have much , her mom still managed to get by , supporting them both the best she could. :’))

tbh, bree didn’t think a lot about her family’s financial situation when she was little. though, with that said,  she was a bit of a pain. 

not because she asked for, or constantly wanted material things, but rather, from a young age she had a knack for taking stuff apart and trying to put them back together again. fascinated by figuring out how certain devices worked. 

that habit eventually turned into bree taking things around the house, and makings ‘ improvements’ or crafting something completely new with the different parts she’d collected from items lying about.

 her mother living pay check to paycheck , was certainly in awe of brianna’s talents, but the young girl’s creative outlet definitely caused  some strESS !!

as one can imagine, she got in a lot of trouble as a kid. having a bit of a mischievous streak coupled along with her curious and imaginative tendencies. her mom wasn’t too happy when she came home to find the vacuum deconstructed , with brianna claiming there was a certain component she needed for the jet pack she was planning on creating

throughout her life, bree was always gathering attention, whether is was due to her odd personality, or the things she was creating. however she was especially attracting people’s attention when it came to the science fairs she enjoyed participating in while she’d been in elementary and middle school --- bringing something completely unexpected to ANNIHILATE ( as she would say )  the competition. 

but, brianna created so much buzz, it wasn’t uncommon for her to end up in local news papers as a young ‘genuis’. 

one time, even recruits from MIT came to check out to see what all the talk had been about. 

 when expressing their interest in her, her mother politely declined their offers. thinking bree may have been too young to consider making decisions like that at the time.

 [ yet, because of the news circulating bree, nl had been another group to approach her mom, along with hephaestus in hopes to provide brianna a safe haven from the potential threat of monsters (etc.), though her mother also refused that offer at the time ]

SO basically, bree just vibed through her early years creating a bit of mischief and making cool stuff with her handy dandy tool box ( or more like her mom’s tool box lmfao) 

she went about every day life as a regular kid, completely unaware of her relation to hephaestus until she neared the age of sixteen.

as she got a bit older, her mother fell in love with a pretty well-off guy who worked as an developmental engineer for the united states milt.. they got married and brianna then had a new step father in her life. despite him being much more strict with her. more than what her mom had ever been , they all got along pretty well. more than anything , bree was jus happy for her mom. 

and, it was a plus that they weren’t struggling as much as they originally had been thanks to his financial help.

however, due to an unfortunate turn of events , and a christmas tree having caught fire; their house burnt down. her mom and her stepfather were rescued by the fire department. unfortunately the same couldn’t be said for bree. watching the house engulfed in flames, they worried frantically about their daughter who’d still been trapped inside. but when bree had escaped through the fire by herself , uninjured and not suffering any burns whats so ever. her step-father , along with the fire fighters that had come to help , were hELLA FREAKED OUT. 

her step-dad was straight up like, i don’t fuk w demons.

and it was after the incident that her mother finally revealed the truth to bree about her biological father, and eventually gave her the option of going to nemean lion. which was information brianna’s mom had for quite some time, but had chosen to keep it to herself , simply cause she wasn’t 100% comfortable with bree leaving her so young.  

THANK GOODNESS THEY NEVER EXPERIENCED A MONSTER ATTACK.

though with what had happened, and her step father’s reaction, bree and her mother came to the agreement that it was probably best if she left for nl. 

she eventually moved in after a couple months of trying to make things work at home ( a compromise she made with her mom ). it didn’t work out sadly, and as soon as she turned sixteen, brianna became an official resident at the hotel.  having stayed at nemean until now !!

when she first got to nl she pretty much just embraced the change. throwing herself into training and what not, trying to figure out where her place was , all that teenage stuff. ‘tryina find urself uwu’ . 

AND she did go on missions quite a bit before the change happened !! having enjoyed tagging along to make some extra money, but her obvious calling was always at the forge. 

brianna now and before, has always had a reputation for walking around nl trying to convince people to give her latest weapons or gadgets a go !!

before the change happened at nl, bree was sorta all over the place. (  A MESS !! )  but her goals have become more focused thanks to entering the technology track. so once again, she embraced change with open arms. 

she’s totally digging the improvement that nemean lion has made.

after graduating from her track relatively fast; working on stuff  is what she mainly does nowadays. 

she’s most often found at the forge. cause when she gets an idea, she’s gotta get it done. she has no chill.

yeah, brianna is smart. but on the highkey, she’s only really knowledgeable in her field of expertise. 

SO, SHE DOES HAVE THAT CHAOTIC STUPID ENERGY COURSING THROUGH HER VEINS. if you ask her to do something dumb, she more then likely is gonna be down / say yes. skdjlfsjd

though bree isn’t necessarily materialistic, she is kinda obsessed with money, and making money. $$$$🤑🤑 part of it has to do with not having  had much growing up, and she wants that security YA KNO. but also , she doesn’t feel totally comfortable asking her mom/step-dad for money. so she out here making her own!!

 money is a big motivator for her.

overall, brianna is a brash, outgoing, oddball who is incredibly determined and hardworking. 

cause she’s always tryina get that promo, she can come off a bit opportunistic, selfish, and conceited when it comes to her inventions. typically she means well, she’s just a bit on the crazy side. 

 she has those mad scientist vibes.

POSSIBLE CONNECTIONS !!

first friend brianna made at nl ( someone who was around in 2013 ) 

people she often trained with / went on missions with before the change happened

friends she’s known for a while here at nemean lion

loyal customers who commission weapons ( etc.) from her regularly. cause she likes you, she’s always down to give you a good deal.

double trouble --- just two chaotic souls, come together to do fun shenanigans. 

other people who work at the forge with her

brianna’s go to guinea pigs !! basically she goes to ya’ll when she comes up with a spicey new gadget, weapon, invention, knowing ya’ll are almost always game to get your hands on what she’s got for you.

impulse control --- pretty self explanatory, this person just settles her down. probably a mom friend who keeps her from doing dumb impulsive things.

people she just bothers bc she’s got a cool idea for you, but maybe you’re just like nah.

this person has been on the end of one of brianna’s failed inventions that didn’t turn out so hot. so now you REFUSE to try anything for her again.

people in the ambassador track she is constantly trying to get seen with her gadgets for that promo. she really wants to sell her inventions / sell her patents to big companies. $$

exes !! maybe there was DRAMA, or maybe it was a super chill split. if you wanna snatch this up, we can really do whatever ur vibin’.

enemies

frenemies

a mentor when she first arrived at nl ( someone who was around in 2013 ) they really helped her have an easier time adjusting to everything when she moved in at sixteen.

♡    ——    MEET  LEO  !!

[ KIM DOYOUNG, HE/HIM, CISMALE ]  —  [ LEO PARK ]  is a child of  [ ATHENA ]  with the power of  [ ENHANCED OBSERVING  &  ENHANCED STRATEGY ] .  they were born in  [ 1996 ]  and have been in nemean lion since  [ 2011 ] .  with the change, they  [ HAVE GRADUATED FROM  ]  the  [ HERO ]  role which makes sense since they’re usually  [ TRAINING or READING IN THE LIBRARY  ]  

(  ABOUT PAGE )

the son of athena, and a graduate from the hero track !!

honestly, leo’s life before nl was pretty boring.

 he grew up in a super small town and was raised by his grandparents after his dad pretty much bailed .

leo was an incredibly bright kid. he learned to read as well as write at a crazy young age, but because he was brought up by his grandparents his taste pretty much reflected his upbringing.  he likes super old music, movies. etc. and he’ prefers considerably less exciting pass times such as  reading books or playing games like chess. he always goes for a walk super early in the morning too which is something he picked up from his grandpa.

leo’s grandparents took care him when he was very little, but as leo grew older he found himself returning the favor and  instead helping his grandparents as they themselves aged over the years.

no one in his household was aware of leo’s ties to his biological mother athena. mainly cause his father never explained anything before he left the family to be on their own. 

leo’s life dramatically changed after he experienced a monster attack when he’d been fifteen years old. 

basically some demigods from nemean lion saved the day and thankfully nothing terrible happened. but leo’s identity as a demigod was finally exposed  to himself and to his family.

 he had a really hard time saying goodbye, as he worried how his grandma and grandpa were gonna do without him. however, he feared putting them in danger above all else. 

he was then taken to nl, where he spent his time up until now.

after he was rescued, leo couldn’t help but look up to the others who regularly went on missions and hunted monsters. naturally, he worked hard with the aspiration to be like them. 

 a lot of that also had to do with why he picked the hero track when the change had come about at nl.

if it wasn’t for moving, leo would have never realized his supernatural abilities. and it was through persistence and intense training that he was able to develop his powers over time, as well as pretty fast.

he has always been incredibly dedicated and disciplined. 

tbh he kinda has those old man vibes, even when he first arrived at fifteen.

 he takes missions and everything a little too seriously. 

he doesn’t really know how to have fun either. so when he is on hero duty, he is super STUBBORN about doing everything by the book. trying not to get too crazy and always wanting to make sure extra precaution is taken. 

he’s not about them risk. he really wants to ensure that there’s little to no damage that will be done if he can help it.

comes off grumpy most of the time, but it’s like 95% bc he kinda just sucks when it comes to people.

 social interaction is not his thing which is why he could have NEVER gone into the ambassador track lmfao.

LEO IS A RULE FOLLOWER, NOT A BREAKER. 

though he’s diligent, responsible and honest, he can also be EXTREMELY gullible, too straightforward, and at times, come off  as nagging or bossy.

overall, he just wants justice, and to ensure things are done right. but he’s not the best communicator, so instead of being diplomatic about it, a lot of the time he’s just like, ‘i’m right, you’re wrong’dkjsldjf

POSSIBLE CONNECTIONS !!

people leo has known or been friends with for a while

other demigods who he used to train with or currently trains with regularly

( friendly ?? ) competition --- likely another hero who has graduated from the hero track

someone currently training in the hero track who has asked to shadow leo ( BONUS POINTS IF THEY ARE CHAOTIC AND LEO IS DESPERATELY TRYING TO WRANGLE THEM IN FROM THEIR WILD WAYS, ESPECIALLY WHILE THEY ARE OUT DOING HERO TINGZ )

the demigods who saved leo when he was fifteen ( someone who was around nl in 2011 / before )

unexpected duo----no one would have thought these two would be super close. after all, they are polar opposites, but this person gets leo to come out of his shell 

leo is super uptight, and because of that, this person enjoys messing with him. 

another person that frequents library just as much as him

maybe leo lowkey has beef with someone because every time he wants to check out a book, the mysterious person ‘insert muses name’ always has checked it out before him. one day when he’s talking about it, he finds out it’s YOU!!!!!!! how it plays out is up to whatever u’re feelin. but turns out they have the same taste in books. 

other people that are also uptight like leo and that’s why they get along so well

enemies---for whatever reason the two don’t mix

someone leo has an unrequited crush on , bc he’s lame

[transgenderboobs]

prem! got any jonmartin or daisira headcanons 👀👀

let’s talk about daisira because i Love Them and should they not get a happy ending together i will surrender Myself to the hunt so i can hunt jonny and alex for sport

can i start out by saying that. i always pictured them to have. the longest mutual pining thing going on

like i think the whole time they worked together for the c*ps, they were in love and never managed to admit it. daisy’s stoic and dealing with her own fear avatar issues so she doesn’t really notice basira’s into her and basira’s just a classic lesbian who’s too scared to make a move b/c daisy is the Best Partner She’s Ever Had and she does not want to fuck that up

legit i don’t think they get together until post mag160

like daisy gives into the hunt, jon pulls martin out of the lonely, the apocalypse happens, and finallyyyyyy basira finds daisy again

obviously she pulls daisy out of the hunt via the power of gay love just like jon did w/ maritn and the lonely.

she takes daisy’s face between her hands, b/c she’s spent the last few (weeks? months? time. idk) not even sure if daisy’s alive or not, so she’s not gonna waste this opportunity and she’s not gonna let daisy go again

even consumed by the hunt daisy doesn’t hurt basira. obviously. she’s the one thing daisy’s been able to see clearly since she let her entity take her over to save her friends

she sort of. stops. and basira can see her calm down and recognize basira. 

finally she says “basira” in That Voice and sort of collapses against her in a hug (let daisy and basira be soft together god damn it all)

they escape together and find a moment of peace (before they all join forces and save the world with the power of gay love and found family, but that comes later) 

daisy holds onto basira, and basira finally, finally tells daisy she loves her and daisy finally feels safe, even if it’s just for a moment, like she basira is taking some of the weight on her shoulders and helping her bear it, and smiles into basira’s shoulder and says she loves her too. 

they maybe cry a little, don’t tell anyone

and some misc/less serious thoughts:

basira wears daisy’s sweaters every day. daisy is beefy and tall so they are Very big on her and she LOVES them

they are that meme. u know the one:

daisy: my gf is out of town so i’m gonna cut the sleeves off all my shirts

martin: why? 

daisy: she’s is basically 90% of my impulse control

daisy has big scary fangs after she comes back from the hunt. basira……thinks it’s mad hot

daisy dresses like a bbq dad on her days off. complete with tacky hawaiian shirts and cut off jorts. 

basira would dress like a distinguished gay but she keeps stealing daisy’s fucking clothes so she mostly looks just as tacky

on the flip side daisy sometimes steals basira’s clothes but they’re quite small on her and they show off all her muscles and basira is Into It

basira…..loves forehead kisses. giving and getting, she’s not picky

daisy curls up in basira’s lap at night and basira reads to her

daisy! is! the! little spoon!

i think i need to stop now b/c i could go on forever tbh !

[eyestells]

i. basics

full name: charla odette lee

gender: demigirl 

pronouns: she/her

power/s: magic

weapon/s: all

dominant hand: ambidextrous 

sexual orientation: pansexual

romantic orientation: greyromantic

age: 24

birthday: 11/22

role: hero

focus in role: teaching demigods and destroying monsters

zodiac sign: scorpio 

hometown: chicago, il

living condition  ( in nl or off site ): in nl, she shares a room w drew

spoken languages: english, greek

ii. appearance

face claim: suzy

hair color: naturally black, turned brown from being in the sun so much

eye color: brown, but she wears enchanted earrings (moody judys) that change her eye color based on her mood

ethnicity: korean

nationality: american

height: 5′2

piercings: single earrings, she used to have her septum pierced but it got in the way of her training

tattoos (nl tattoo position and others):   nl - above her left outer elbow. example.

birthmarks: n/a

scars: too many to count tbh.

she has one down her left jawline, one across her stomach, one on her left upper cheek, one that starts at her neck and makes a diagonal to her lower chest, one horizontal line about five inches above her left knee, one on her left thigh about two inches thick, etc.

iii. psychology

sociability: kind of, she’ll talk to people if she’s bored which is often

phobias: nothing

vices: she’s too blunt. does that count lskdjf

alignment: chaotic neutral

briggs-myers: entp

temperaments: choleric

how do they view themselves? 

she knows she’s intense and that and that a lot of people don’t like her because of how blunt she is but she doesn’t care

how do others view them? 

basically what she thinks of herself but i think a good amount of them respect how disciplined she is since she’s one of the top heroes of nl

iv. mannerisms:

accent: light so-cal

hobbies: training, being on patrol 

motivations: her friends

v. relationships

human parent: jack lee

step-mom: noel lee (deceased) 

godly parent: circe

siblings: levi

relationship with the human family: 

they’re fine, she isn’t too close with her dad or sister since she was taken to the building at a really young age and wasn’t able to spend time with them often.

relationship with godly parent: 

oddly better than her human family. she can actually hold a conversation with circe about anything and feels more comfortable around her than her other family members

what was their childhood like? 

she spent all her time at nl and mainly focused on training

pets:  dog ( shih tzu ) - hershey

vi. misc

glasses/contacts? she just has fake glasses

clothing style: comfortable and more mask , but she recently started getting dressed by nat so now she dresses very fashionably 

favorite food: probably something boojie like steak and lobster

favorite desert: thai milk tea ice cream

favorite hot drink: hot tea

favorite cold drink: arnold palmer with a splash of red bull

favorite movie: john wick

favorite show: n/a

favorite book: she doesn’t read at all

favorite weather: cloudy

coffee or tea: either 

cats or dogs: both

pineapples on pizza or no pineapples on pizza? no pineapples, she doesn’t like mixing savory and sweet

vii. traits

positive: brave, ambitious, strategic

negative: dumb af, impulsive, extra

extroverted / introverted / in between

disorganised / organised / in between

close minded / open-minded / in between

calm / anxious / in between

disagreeable / agreeable / in between

cautious / reckless / in between

patient / impatient / in between

outspoken / reserved / in between

leader / follower / in between

empathetic / unempathetic / in between

optimistic / pessimistic / in between

traditional / modern / in between

hard-working / lazy / in between

cultured / un-cultured / in between

loyal / disloyal / in between

faithful / unfaithful / in between

viii. ic questionnaire

why did you come to nl?

my dad started it so i had to come

how are you dealing with the recent changes?

it’s fine, i don’t like all the eyes on me and that i’m not allowed to talk to the public. like, let me live the fuck

what did you do before the change?

train and hunt monsters, what i’m doing now

why did you get into the role you’re in?

i trained all the time before so lou asked me to be part of the first group of heroes

how do you like it? was this the role you wanted to be in?

it’s the same so i like it. yeah, all the other roles sound like too much work

if you could be in any other role, what would it be?

none i can’t do anything else

how do you like your powers?

yeah! it’s super handy

how much control do you have of your powers?

full control

what are some of your goals?

doing what i can so less humans are being killed

what game could you destroy everyone in?

i don’t play games

what did you want to be when you grew up?

something in music

thoughts on your own singing voice?

i think it’s good and i’ve been told it’s good too

what’s your greatest fear?

not dying in combat

what are some things you always carry with you?

a weapon and my phone

do you drive?

yes and i’ve been told i drive terribly but i haven’t been in a car crash yet so --

what’s your favorite book and why?

i haven’t read a book since high school

what’s your favorite tv or movie genre?

action

[1eos]

@diaryofasmallblackwoman​ wanted a chart roast (sorry this took so long) nd wtf is w yall nd these stelliums????????????

firstable youre automatically valid nd iconic for being an earth sign w a fire moon 😌💖 that is the best combo ever. still what is with your houses JAJAKGKAGJKKJAGJKG

first thing im noticing is that your sun is in 12th house which means u have no idea what the fuck is going on in your own damn head!!!! 12th house is the house of the unconscious nd what we keep hidden so to have sun, your ego, here is a lil 🤔 at best you’re really thoughtful, a bit introverted, but very in tune with the world bc u see shit but at worst u’re just totally lacking self awareness nd terrorizing the world bc of it 😭😭😭

nd tbh sun in 12th combined w your cap sun i feel like u probably worry too much abt how u appear to others nd you can be a mega perfectionist. or even that u struggle w imposters complex like thinking ure never as good as ppl think even tho you really do work hard nd deserve everything u have! 

anyways...........aries moon............crazy. caps w aries moons are funny bc on the surface theyre all 😐 nd trustworthy but their inner selves are wild af nd they can be soooooooooooo impulsive. but they hate that theyre impulsive bc capricorn suns are totally against that shit. still i think caps are best at keeping their impulses in check 

god u have a cap mercury AND MARS! cap mercuries r ok.........theyre a lil monotone but they still have nice voices. cap mars are slow to anger nd again are really controlled. which is a good thing ig but when ppl have a lot of cap placements i 👀 bc cap placements are like super melodramatic when their feelings get hurt. like if someone doesnt pay them back a dollar they borrowed they say theyll never loan money for as long as they want

nd w cap mars they can keep shit in for so long until they fucking EXPLODE. like a fucking volcano. dont do that u’ll hurt sumn. esp bc u have like no air placementsJGAGJAJGJGA nd air placements make ppl less tense nd more........airy..............

so ure def more the type to take everything seriously. looking at your aspects u have a shit ton of squares which means that your mind is a fucking battlefield but all that fighting makes u mentally resilient. absolutely nothing short of a nuclear explosion can keep u down

😭😭😭😭even your sun and moon are squared are u ok?

that basically means your ego nd your emotions stay beefing 24/7 but like i said earlier ‘bad’ aspects are actually good for u bc u learn how to overcome nd it drives u to succeed. nd fun fact! its oftentimes ppl with nothing but ‘good’ aspects that tend to waste their potentials bc they go thru life so sheltered they dk how to handle conflict!

overall i’d say u need to chill out........don’t be so tense........take time to stop nd smell the roses........drink a lil wine............nd just calm down........

[flamereign]

so i’ve always sorta wanted to make a short (ish) overview of lea’s mental/emotional state during & post kh3,  as the game in all it’s Disney Is For Kids!!! fashion glossed over a lot of the results, repercussions and consequences of going through the kind of trauma axelea went through. of course, this is based on my view of events ( i.e. lea did not relinquish his heart willingly and did not cope well at all to his heartless state as axel which does have repercussions on lea’s state of mind once he got his heart back ) and what i’d imagine that would do to a guy who spent about a decade in a really emotionally toxic environment basically suppressing his emotions / memories and even his past identity.  as i just want to give an overview, i tried keeping it as short and to the point as possible, but it did still get a tad long thanks to my tendency to ramble so sorry in advance ... 

in any case, thanks for reading!  here goes

during and early post kh3 lea gets easily overwhelmed by emotions. as i stated earlier, he did spent about a decade believing he couldn’t feel,  even resulting in him gaslighting himself whenever he did feel something. because he essentially lost his heart around age 15-16 you could say he’s basically still stuck in puberty, only with some added ptsd to the mix: lea literally has to relearn how to process and identify emotions within himself after a decade of suppressing them*. emotions, therefore, tend to hit him hard and fast, can take him utterly by surprise and he has difficult getting them back under control. this can lead to either an overreaction of a certain type of emotion ( for example laughter that turns to unstoppable giggles,  tears that turn to uncontrollable sobbing, mild anxiety that can flip to a panic attack at even the smallest triggers ),  contrary emotional reactions ( crying when happy, wanting to laugh when actually feeling angry or nervous, or even just a lack of emotional response when he's feeling sad ) loss of temper / anger due to embarrassment or even complete dissociation / a feeling of numbness. *see also point 3

this emotional overload leads to hypersensitivity especially if there are added outside stimuli; if it gets really bad even the touch of clothes against his skin feels like too much. in some cases, it can also result in a feeling of extreme depersonalization**, a feeling like he’s not part of his own body anymore,  like his consciousness is torn in every which direction and he’s about to splinter apart. his usual reaction is to isolate himself to a contained space with little to no outside stimuli ( so a dark, quiet and small space ) until he can come back to himself. if for any reason he can’t,  it will result in an anxiety attack or even him flipping to rage form and lashing out. **in this case, it actually helps him a lot of there is a weight placed on top of him to ground him back into the here and now: sometimes this means he’ll go sit in the shower under a really hard stream of water,  or he’ll go huddle into a really tight space or, if there is someone around he trusts, he’ll even calm down if they lay down on top of him as it also reassures him they’re real and they’re there.  anyone else touching him is a big no no in this situation, however. 

lea has a mild case of alexithymia as a result of the decade long suppression of his own emotions and feelings.  though this condition is defined as a personality trait,  in lea’s case it’s more of a result of that very specific trauma ( see also the point 1 ), and will get less impacting as time goes on and lea learns to readjust to life with heart and emotions once more. alexithymia is mainly characterized by: a) difficulty identifying feelings and distinguishing between feelings in the self and in others, b) difficulty describing feelings to others.  point a) also results in point 1 and 2 while point b) results more in point 4 below and actually makes talking about his experiences and his feelings quite taxing for him.

as a result of all of the above, he still shows a lot of avoidance behaviors:  deflecting ( mostly with humour or self depreciation ),  distracting himself w/ something else instead of letting himself process ( like, throwing himself immediately into training to become a keyblade wielder and saving his friends rather than, yanno, give himself some fucking time to breathe ),  becoming defensive or angry when people push ( exceptions here roxas / xion / isa / others, depending on plotted relationship, but even then it’s difficult for him to fully open up ) and he’ll rather avoid talking about the heavy stuff altogether for as long as possible, preferring to act like things are fine even if his body language and facial expressions clearly show things are, in fact, not fine. 

to add to the above:  unlike axel,  who had a kick ass poker face, lea has a really hard time hiding what he feels,  but that still doesn’t make it easier for him to express what he feels.  he may be an open book to others,  but it’s not as obvious to himself. of course contextually or depending on the situation he can infer whether his own state of mind is happy or sad or anxious and he does still have previous experience to draw on,  but if the context or situation can’t help him it could be that he cries but will not be able to say if they’re happy tears or sad tears,  if he feels unsettled he won’t be able to easily discern if it’s anger, if it’s frustration, anxiety or simply because there’s something physical going on ( lack of sleep / eating / oncoming illness etc etc ).  as you can imagine this is very frustrating to him and does not help the bullet points i already expanded on above. 

regardless of the motivations and traumas that guided axel’s behaviors and actions ( which i will make a separate post about ),  getting his heart back has been a quite eye-opening experience to lea to the extent he’s willing to go to survive,  to all of his worst qualities and sides and to the fact that he’s capable of doing the things he’s done:  his past as axel and the things he’s done are causing a tremendous amount of guilt, identity issues*** and even self-loathing culmulating in mild depression.  in short, the confidence he used to have as a kid and as a nobody have taken a big ass dent.  despite the fact that the keyblade has chosen him,  he often doubts and second guesses on whether he’s even worthy of it and had it not been for his determination to save his friends and fix past wrongs,  he might’ve even renounced that power all together thinking he doesn’t truly deserve to be a wielder.  this self-doubt and lack of confidence caused him a lot of issues in his training even getting the keyblade to appear and is, imo, one of the big reasons why he was overpowered so easily by xemnas in that final confrontation.  ***in my opinion, the traits of the nobodies can be seen as that actual person’s worst traits magnified -- in a way, axel can be seen as lea’s inner darkness: the selfishness, the impulsiveness, the temper, that manipulative side, the ruthlessness and the dishonesty are all traits that were already there, but were always balanced out and trumped by his positive traits. lea post kh3 has gotten to know a lot more about himself and essentially does not like the things he found out:  quite understandably he’s having a hard time accepting and reconciling axel with who he is as lea now and as a result he subconsciously tries to suppress the parts that are axel while consciously trying to accept them, which causes him to feel like he’s not sure anymore who he is and who he is supposed to be.  this only adds to the guilt and self-doubts he already experiences.  this is also why i thought that him letting other people use the name axel for him so easily was a really weird decision in the game. 

with his tendency to doubt his own worth also comes paranoia. one big example is the automatic suspicion he feels at nice / friendly gestures, actions or words -- a suspicion mainly borne from the thought that he doesn’t really deserve those,  or that it shouldn’t be as easy. especially during kh3 this will largely center around the other wielders of light or really anyone who’s known him as axel. 

a large part of the paranoia is also linked to his ptsd; he is very hyper-aware:  this can be hyper-awareness in specific situations -- for example he’ll feel uncomfortable in large crowds, or in spaces with low visibility, he’ll flinch at loud & sudden noises, will go from relaxed to ready to attack in the span of a second if someone or something startles him and he will shy away from touch from people he doesn’t know -- or even in a general sense meaning that in any given situation where things seem to be going well or he’s feeling happy he’s always in some part waiting for the other shoe to drop or for the situation to blow up in his face as some kind of karmic retribution. as a result, there’s part of him that has become very sensitive to change as any signs of abrupt and inexplicable change in his life will be interpreted as a sign of impending doom, to put it very dramatically. this in turn can feed into the emotional overload and bodily hypersensitivity i described further above. 

for that latter part, the same can be said about his relationships with other people. i don’t think it’ll come as a surprise to know that with everything he’s gone through and the losses he’s faced as axel, his part of the blame in that aside for a moment, lea has some major abandonment issues.   this also ties in with his low confidence, self-doubt and guilt complex: it’ll take a long time for him to trust that someone will actually want to stick around and part of him is also hypersensitive to signs of behavioral changes in others towards him -- in short, part of him is also always waiting for the people he cares about and who obviously also care about him to wise up about what a failure he is and consequentially leave him. if by any chance this does happen, even if it is through no fault of any party, he’ll always instinctively place the blame on himself, putting it down as something he’s said or done to make that person go.  as a result, if that person returns lea will be both clingy as well a avoidant as he a) wants for them to stick around and b) doesn’t trust them not to leave again, so it’d be better to simply keep his distance. 

the above also results in him not wanting to show his flaws, his doubts and weaknesses: he loathes failure, internalizes and bottles up a lot of his negative emotions towards himself and others and pushes himself beyond his boundaries often just to try and prove that he can ( despite not truly believing that he is ). he’s afraid that if the people he cares for and respect know about his doubts and fears, it’ll increase the risk of them leaving him behind. this is especially apparent in kh3 towards his fellow keyblade wielders: despite having his doubts about being worthy of the keyblade, it’s not something he would’ve ever said or shown, believing that if he showed any signs of not being able to handle the weight of the keyblade, they’d sideline him or boot him out completely. considering a big motivation for him joining the battle in the first place was to atone, to fix past mistakes by helping to save his friends, the idea of having that chance taken away caused a lot of fear and inner stress, resulting in frequent bouts of exhaustion and depression, more self-loathing, defensiveness and even anger if someone tried to critique his actions or question his motives. 

due to the above described symptoms of his ptsd, depression and emotional instability, he has issues with insomnia. whenever he does manage to get sleep, he also frequently experiences very vivid nightmares and night terrors. whereas as axel he’d turn to sleep to pass the time,  as lea he tends to avoid sleep altogether unless absolutely necessary.

obviously i realize that reading all of the above combined makes it sound as if lea’s struggling under huge emotional and mental strain every day ( and technically speaking he sorta is because this is not something that turns off from one day to the next ),  but i also want to add that lea himself doesn’t particularly think of himself as unhappy or depressed 24/7 ( or even at all ) so it’ll not always be super apparent in his attitude or the way i write him in threads. imo, lea’s strength has always come from his empathy, his mental fortitude and his ability to adapt --- and i don’t want to forget that on top of all the negative, he’s finally experiencing all the positive sides of having his heart back as well. this, plus the fact that, unlike axel, he actually has a support system to fall back on, friends that support him and who he can support in return, definitely help him a lot in his day to day activities. 

nevertheless the above are all factors i take into account to determine the way axelea thinks and chooses to react to certain situations and in his interpersonal relationships and are thus important to my portrayal of him. so to anyone who’s read this entire thing:  i love you from the bottom of my heart. 

[kanene-yaaay]

'How was I suppose to know?! You were my first case!’

Author’s note: 

So, once upon a time there was a @yussuna, who gives the idea of a fanfic/drawing challengue to a crazy writer called Kanene.

Since them thing went down a downhill. 

And then this story born! Yaaaaaaaaay!!!

Okay xDD. But, seriously, this is one of the works I am most proud for, and I really, really would appreciate if you give this a shot. It is very crazy and random, I have to admit, but it has a golden heart.

XDDD

Warnings, fun facts, random things and stuff:

* This is a totally original story! Who would knew I still knowing how to write it! :D

* This is a SFW oneshot. ^w^)b

* I need to warning for blood (kind of?), cutting and use of electricity as weapon. Nothing very detailed, though.

* Sorry for any spelling, pontuation and grammar mistakes! Any and every advice is very very welcome! Please give me your opinion! \(-w-)/

* Something around 4.000 words.

* Portuguese version (Brazilian’s one) coming soon (Provavelmente vai ser só de noite pq eu preciso sair agora, enton, desculpaa!)! Thankys for reading, my lollipops! Have a incredible week! Eat cucumbers and hug an a guardian angel!

                               [ ~*~]

“You need to stop staring me while I sleep, it’s terrifying.”

“Correction: Guard. And request denied. My system has been updated to not open a slightest infinitesimal loophole possible for you to escape.”

“Urg. You guys, ‘perfect’ guards, are SO exaggerated. - The freckled started to walk in slow steps to the kitchen, tossing his shirt to the couch, being followed by the dark as chocolate skinned, who frowned his face to the neglect with the garment lying faint in the furniture, his  impeccable posture almost undoing in disbelief as heard the other’s words.

“Pardon me, exaggerated?!”

Like a movie, they both saw the memories going by as a bittersweet trailer in their own minds: The guard enjoying the calm morning silence and the sweet aroma from the first batch of delicacies being deliciously baked in the nearest bakery in the exact sun rise, receiving greetings even from the singing birds. He felt absolutely charged. Calmly opened his eyes, submerging himself in his desire to hum as he blinked a few times, his glare being totally captured for a light movement on the window. His pupils made soft metallic sound as they  readjusted to better focus in the scene before him.

Which, for some reason, happened to be the fugitive blatantly falling out from the same, without a single hint of balance or sense of self-preservation as he lifted from the ground and started to fastly run through the yard which surrounded the house, the dolphin patterned pajamas shining with the dirt spots acquired from the garden. 

Mathias almost felt moved, even impressed, by the boldness, a feeling that deprived him from his actions for a brief pieces of moments.

Before leaving in a methodical and unbridled career after him.

“I was just practicing my morning run. I need to keep me alive until at least the next decade, preferably.”

“ You clearly was running away.”

“You have no evidence, and I just speak in presence of my lawyer.”  Opened his cupboard (his back staring the dark skinned and being a loyal confident for the police officer, who imitated him with gaudy gestures and grimaces) and placed the pan with water on the oven, his eyes meeting the other’s, who already was in his perfect position with erect back and impassive face, his hand rubbing the back of his neck as a slightly signal of embarrassment.  “Do you drink pure coffee or with milk?”

“Your devil’s advocate? And I don’t drink coffee, sir.”

“Mathias.” Completed the sentence that had already received its final point with a distracted tune, going towards the blender and filling it with water. Gave an ironic with a drop of amargure, crackle. “I’m not the devil. One of the demons, maybe. From the lowest class. The feathers from a fallen angel, to be honest.”

“ Pardon me?”

“You already live with me. - Guard. - Yeah, yeah. Guard, live, whatever. The thing is, we have been together for five months and you calling me ‘sir’ make me feel old.”  

“It’s not in my protocols to call you by your name, sir.”

“ -all powerful, Mathias.” Once again completed the finished sentence.

The guard narrowed his eyes to the grin from the other.

“I’ll keep completing all and any phrase of yours, then.” He poured the milk powder into the water, taking a full spoon just to put it in his mouth. “Chocolate milk, then?”

“I don’t have need to eat, si-” His sentence was interrupted when he noticed the sparkle in the shirtless’ look. “Matheus.”

“Mathias.”

“That was what I said, Matheus.”

This time was his round of receiving the annoyed look, sustaining its with a smile that illuminated the room and almost had his own chorus of heavens by the angelical and (false) innocent tune which he possessed.

“You’re pronouncing it wrong.” Had to blink, the smile was too shiny, even to his standards. He licked his teeth, his lips curling as he didn't break the gaze which he expected to be intimidating. “And you know it.”

“I am an, fluent in more than ten languages, android, sir Matheus. I can assure you that I know how to pronounce a name.”

Silence.

Matheu- Mathias let out a defeated sigh, shaking his head.

“You still haven't answered my question.” Started to mix the powdered coffee in the boiled water, the smell immediately spreading throughout the kitchen and the Perfect Police Officer code 128√e980 controlled his impulse to close his eyes to appreciate it deeply. “And don’t try to sell me this bullshit of ‘I’m an android and I don’t eat and nhenhenhe.’ I’ve already seen you stealing my gingerbreads in the middle of the dawn.” Still mixing the coffee as his had turned 270º degreedes to stare the the android who keep him under surveillance. - So? Chocolate Milk? Tea? Coffee?

The other thanked for his shade of skin that made difficult the perception of how much heated his facial system was; opened his mouth some centímeters, being almost possible to see the synapse powdery working in order to seek an answer on the same level of the half truth and half sincerity  teasing tune.

He didn’t find it.

“Chocolate milk.” Quiet murmur, deviated his gaze from the face which turned again to the activity being made, calmly humming.

It took some minutes drowned in silence while breakfast was being served. The police officer decided to help set the table, partly for a fact question of moral and empathy and the other part, more true, being the one which preferred ignore the dance steps, stuffed for the music that now freely flied from his lips, that Mathias risked, almost dropping plenty of times all the drinks on the floor for trusting on an equilibrium which he did not have when it came to floating.

Humans are so weird.

“Uhh. We’re out if breads… You will have to buy more.”

The law enforcement officer blinked once, twice and more three times in disbelief before facing the other. 

“Excuse me? Whose house is it?”

“Mine, but I can’t go out, remember? I’m in home prison.” Took a big sip of the not strained coffee.

“Misconception. You can move up to 100 meters from your home in order to perform activities to fulfill basic needs, as supermarketing.” 

“Oh, now I see. Do you mean that when I wanted to do my morning run to keep myself healthy and alive this rule never was mentioned, but now when it affects you, suddenly I can have rights and go roaming around?”

“Misconception. You are modificating my words in order to make me accomplish what you want.”

“Rude.”

“The bakery is next to your house.”

Mathias loudly took another sip of coffee, launching to the lively dark eyes an incisive condemnatory look. Few hair strands falling down his face.

“I am not paid for that.” The bright smile one go up, without any smile on lips, which twitched in an annoyed pout, and went grumbling to the prisoner's room to get his wallet, because he didn’t really had a payment.

“Thank you, dear. ~”

Per protocols androids didn’t swore, cursed and neither pronounce threats to any human, in life or not, regardless ofthe situation.

But that didn’t mean that they didn’t thought about it.

[~*~]

Mathias began to receive calls from the gang. He didn’t really gave much details about them, however he always researched a shade of pale skin more and more stronger with each of them. Sometimes the shade took too long to leave. All the numbers were from prepaid cell phones and their tracking always led to a dead end, no surprises from the biggest gang of the perimeter. They got people highly trained and infiltrated in any place. His guard work slowly and yet suddenly, metamorphosed in a protection work, which for some reason managed to calm both.

The robot who never had a name inhaled, observing his own breath being dissipated by the thick and cold drops, which plummeted from the sky in the shape of a majestic storm. It was night. A night without moon and with the only illumination stemming from light poles, automobiles headlights and his night vision. He had administered a dose of sleeping pill in Mathias’ juice, since the sleepless nights started to research a concern and definitely not healthy number. He already had studied each one of the contradictions from the product so as the long hair’s medical record, until know the right amount to use and be sure that it wouldn’t hurt him.

For this he found himself comfortable to enjoy at least for a second the sensation of freedom which he felt for being in the middle of this phenomenon. Closed his eyes and swirled in the same spot a few times, feeling with pleasure the freezing sensation took over his systems together with the wet grass aroma. The world was silent, as if even the nature shut up for a instante to appreciate its beauty.

It was… contagious, it was liberating. In the middle of the storm no one guard him, no protocols holded him, nobody weirdly stared him when he used the verb ‘feel’ and didn’t ignored him as soon they no longer needed his services.

There he was, was…

“NO!!!”

No?

Opened his eyes and three bangs, as little explosions one after another, became present. Few milliseconds after he felt himself fell, a second scream spreading through the air, cutting the calm and fullness he had been in.

Gasping. He was gasping. Weird feeling. Chest tightness. His pupils quickly focused in the form before him.

It had the green and blue colors mixed in small stripes through all his shape. It was bright. Bright enough at the point to completeky extinguish the darkness in the garden at night without satellites or stars. It was-

“MATHIAS??!”

Yes, with his long strands hair bouncing around his face, showing little fins which he had in place of ears; his pajamas hitting and vibrating strongly over his, literally, gleaming skin, whose shine seemed to spread even more with the rain that covered, yet no longer hit, them. He floated, as he always did when was distracted, however this time he seemed to have an established goal, his hand extended in an unknown energy field, apparently of protection, since in it contained two bullet projectiles, while his other hands was pressed in his shoulder which was-

“Shot! You’ve been hit!” Automatically the android connected himself in his Data Network, taking all the possibles and necessaries for the situation. His body impulsed itself, getting up and moving closer to the other, taking off his shirt and tearing it up to make a tourniquet. His gestures were quick and precise, even though his legs shook for a moment when heard the pain interjection, said in the middle of gritted teeths, from his partner. “How?” His glare was suddenly drawn to the three beings who were in attack positions, guns in hand and shining in their chests…

“Distinctives. They got hell of agents infiltrated in the police.”  He wanted to tell that his had a surprised tune, or even that he successfully attempted to hide the astonishment in his voice, but that would be a lie. Actually, this was one of his first theories he had when was arrested and, mainly, leaded to home prision. It was for this reason which in the first month he had been so wary and ignorant with the police android.

And now he got a shot for him. He, who would say?

He was sweating, damn, guns of that level din’t even caused a big amount of damage, however they hurted as if the bullet shards was tap dancing and perforating all of his nerves.

“Can’t you attack them?”

“What?!” His eyes widened, for a instant the pain on his shoulder being a little more light that the unbelieving. “I… Look, this shield is the maximum that I can do at the moment!” Talking hurt. Kneeded down and looked away, suddenly ashamed for his actual condition. “My energy is not physiologically capable to convert itself in any offensive device. Sorry, but you’re going to have to deal with the rest.”

The android’s hands shook, even though his expression remained stoic when nodded. He stared the three forms, who continued shooting bullet after bullet in synchrony. Flexed his arm and relaxed skillfully, as if he was stretching a whip, nevertheless, what actually came of his palm was copper wires, which quickly began to sizzle and snap as electric charge ran all his length. He approached to the shield protecting them, yet couldn’t see the police officers’ face.

Maybe it was for the best.

ERROR. ERROR. BASE PROTOCOL BEING VIOLATED. ERROR. ERROR. RETREAD IMMEDIATELY, REPEAT: RETREAD IMMEDIATELY. BASE PROTOCOL BEING VIOLATED.

He blinked, and then knew about all the effect of electricity on a human being. He knew about the electric chairs, the tortures from Medieval Era World War and nowadays, knew about the electroconvulsive therapies and the perfect voltage to incapacitate an adult human of avarage height and weight.

ERROR. ERROR. BASE PROTOCOL BEING VIOLATED. ERROR. ERROR. RETREAD IMMEDIATELY, REPEAT: RETREAD IMMEDIATELY. BASE PROTOCOL BEING VIOLATED.

He reached out his hand. Androids weren’t built to hurt humans. They were prohibited to do that. Each movement made feel like there was fire in his metal connections, the ‘error’ warnings beating and pulsing in each one of his systems as a series of spam, or that future appointment you would not want to be reminded right now.

He remembered the scream of pain, the sensation of freedom, the rain, the weird feeling in his chest and his work, his first case and in what it had been metamorphosed:

ERROR. ERROR. BASE PROTOCOL BEING VIOLATED. ERROR. ERROR. RETREAD IMMEDIATELY, REPEAT: RETREAD IMMEDIATELY. BASE PROTOCOL BEING VIOLATED.

Protect Mathias.

“Undo the barrier.” If it was on the right voltage there wouldn't be much damage. “On three, tow, one…”

ERROR. ERROR. BASE PROTOCOL BEING VIOLATED. ERROR. ERROR. RETREAD IMMEDIATELY, REPEAT: RETREAD IMMEDIATELY. BASE PROTOCOL BEING VIOLATED.

“NOW!”

A hole opened itself on the shield, allowing the three conductors wires to unfold themselves and grabbed in each of the police officer’s ankles, electricity discharges flowing through his body and suffering interferences by the rain.

His head throbbing as if the discharges had being on him, which makes sense, since something needed to be the source to charge his attack. Mathias passed, weak small steps, him, analyzing the bodies on the ground.

“Wow. You hit them all at once, and still got to see that they were androids. Impressive.” The one with freckles, not that this was noticeable in the sightly darkness which returned to ravage the place when his gleam amenized, turned out, his smile in a mingle of pain and congratulations. Their gaze met and he realized in the same second:

He didn’t knew.

The robotic voice screaming the protocol in his head shutted up. His eyes were moist, his mind throbbing, shrivers of pain running up his spine and his hands trembled.

‘It must be due to the rain.’, said to himself.

“Hey, we need to go, okay?” The worried face entered in his vision field, his hand went to his not-in-his-so-perfect-pose, shoulder, and he nodded in response.

They came in the house right to the bathroom and with a tweezer the one with technologic systems removed the bullet, wrapping the wound in gauze and pronouncing a few enchantments, offered by Mathias, on the said. The agent got up and moved toward the sink, washing his hands.

“We will need to leave as soon as possible.” He pulled out a pocket knife and unsheathed the blade, observing his reflex with a inexpressive face.

“Sure. I will start to pack the most importMY GOD WHY ARE YOU CUTTING YOUR FACE?”

The police, maybe no longer, officer raised his hand, preventing the other to approached even a single small centimeter. The only eye which was seeing properly, since the cut had been  just above his left eyebrow and the liquid spreaded in a intense flow through a great part of half of his face, focused in the opened cut as he stirred with the, previously sterilized, tweezer in it. Mathias felt an unpleasant goose bump travel through his body, making his bright color became in a more opaque shade, didn’t deviating the glare only for pure concern. 

“Tracking chip. We all have it in case of any emergency. And don’t worry, my nervous system is different from yours. Quick, pack our things.”

Sure that ‘our’ wasn’t just metaphorically. Mathias grabbed two bags and put the basic first: food, first aid apparatus, a pair of shoes to each one, flashlight, prepaid cell phone (like all the great people with important secrets, he got one), towel, raincoats and money to the complete makeover they would do. After that he arranged the superficial which he knew that had its parts of essentially: The book that the agent started one of these days, his pocket videogame, a SD card with important photos and THE teddy bear (whom it belonged? Mystery.) All together he came back to the bathroom, where needed to sew the other’s corrugator supercilii, who was starting to feel a bit dizzy.

They got on the first bus they found. A travel bus, the only main reason for being so crowded. The sat in the back for both precaution and privacy, which seemed a little to much cautelous, since the two kids jumping from side to side (”I TOLD you to not give them chocolate for dinner, John!! Now what do you want me to do, huh??? Look! I just want to see when-”) waking up the cute generic newborn baby with a powerful voice in a cry that filled every inch of the automobile. None conversation would be audible even if screamed.

They dried off and ate a little, the silence, way to talk since Angelly was teaching the parrot from the sleeping man sitting on front seat to repeat the word ‘poop’, always following them.

“What you are?”

“I…” They stared each other a little before Mathias looked, seeking to choose his words. “I was a result of an experiment. I can’t remember if I was a human before all of that or if I was created there, I just know that one day I… existed. And on the others days I realized that I couldn’t take anymore tests; They wanted to see how far my power could go, from where it comes, how it could be recreated, if it could be passed on… I couldn’t stand it, almost exploded. I managed to find an escape and ran away from everything. I can easily be confused with a human when I don’t gleam, as you can see, except for some details.” The freckled lifted a lock of hair, showing the different, exotic ears. The black-skinned listened attentively, leaning against him, both because his energy that was in less than half as the loss of his resources, and feeling Mathias equally relax and snuggle in his side as well. “Yet they can be easily hidden. Anyway, I went out into the world. Never had heard about here and even less knew about how everything worked and… Well, a guy from the gang appeared and said that they were looking for people to fill some vacancies there. He said it was enough to be good with secrets and know when shut my mouth and we would almost be as a family…”

Angelly threatened the bird when it ordered her to wash her mouth with soap, and now the animal kept flying around the ceiling of the vehicle while the child menacingly tried to toss peanuts on its. The tourist guide was praying, probably to the Judgment Day happen in the next few hours.

“And everything was being alright in the beginning. But the things I saw there… It was like I was one of the scientists who tested me long ago and I couldn’t… I surrendered, the cops arrested me and the rest is the story you followed.”

 Silence. Mathias was shaking, it could be sensed his whole chest trembling. The ex-police officer adjusted himself so that he could face him.

“I am sorry. Your… entire record seemed so authentic, I would never imagine something like that could happened.”

“Oh. That it’s good. because then you would realize in the exact same time that it was a story from a movie we saw in our first month.”

…

“Excuse me. What?”

“I knew you slept, I mean, recharged during them!! Very rude of you!”

“I didn’t absorbed useless information. What are you talking about?”

“I was joking, guardian angel. I wasn’t a experiment, lol. I am a alien. I’m grounded.” And finally released the laughs that held so much in himself, literally shaking as seeing the unbelieve face from the one who accompanied him, who quickly adjusted his impeccable posture and angrily pushed him, not even noticing the existence of the new nickname.

“You’re a what?”

“An alien. Octopus Specie, I think it is easiest to your database to relate.” Snapped his fingers, his appearance immediately changing for a young adult with long red hairs, freckles, one of the eyes shiny green as half of his stripes and the other blue as the other half. “Distant planet. The humans don’t have an idea about the existence of our galaxy.” The partner didn’t said anything, what give him space to continue explaining himself. “I made some shenanigans in the past so my parents sent me to here as punishment. I can only come back when I learn my lesson.”

“What do you-” Took a deep breath, forbade himself to seek for any logic. “And what is this lesson?”

“I don’t have any idea.” Answered, the guilt in his expression being totally overshadowed by the playfulness in his smile. “I slept in this part of the lecture.”

The android took another breath and deviated his glare, by the way he closed his hand in the seat leaded Mathias ponder if he was imagining that the said object was his face. Gluped.

“So, are you stuck in the Earth until you learn a lesson which you don’t have the single idea what is about?”

“Putting like this seems a bit too exaggerated, but yes.”

“I literally just resumed what you just said and G-a-ah! - Gave up. Leaned in the back of the bus, not even looking bothered with the much his head hit the wall in each irregularity in the trails, which was a lot, that they passed by. He massaged the tip of his nose. ‘Follow orders.’ They said. ‘It is just guard him for he doesn’t run away or has contact with the gang.’ They also said. ‘It won’t be so hard.’ THEY SAID-

In truth, no one in real life had told him that, however it was what always the movies showed, so it must be true.

“Did you really thought that I was a human?” From his tune it was perceptible that he stilled trying to control his laughter, most likely because he noticed that if one more laugh escaped from his lips, his shield would not be enough to prevent the other’s fury, who probably would take his base-protocol and throw in his face. “I always thought it was pretty obvious.”

“Of course I didn’t! How would I even suspect?” Awwww. He was doing the annoyed frustrated pout. Aaaah! Look at this ashamed blush.

“Well, I literally floated? And could rotate my head 270º degrees? And eat strange things?”

“You were my first case! I didn’t had any database about the habits of Homos Sapiens Sapiens, I mean, have you seen the weird traditions they have? There are gestures that in some area is a compliment and in the other is a coursing in the same country! Not to mention the most expensive coffee of the world is made with seeds defecated by a bird! The entire humanity doesn’t make any sense!”

“I know right? I started to float because I read a book and there the character did that! I thought ‘Wow, finally something we have in common!’, I just realized that no one did that when the peoples looked at me weirdly and started to applaud! Here, follow me: if they don’t do that why they say that they do?!” And then lowered down, as he was telling a secret. “I think they do that on purpose.”

The black-skinned nodded wisely, immediately being followed by the other.

“Tsc.” Snorted, irony filling his voice. “And they claim to be the most evolved specie of the planet.

“Cockroaches.”

“Definitely cockroaches.”

“They fits anywhere, don’t die, eat everything…”

“Not cucumber.”

“Cucumber?” Questioned, his line of praise being broken.

“Yes. Toxic components for them. No cucumbers.”

They were like two old ladies in a afternoon tea, gossiping.

“And who would know that aliens are so sarcastics?”

“What? So you’re saying that for me to be an alien I need to be submissive and quiet asking to come back to home or a guy without a slightly sense of compassion and a high technological evolution wanting to kill all living beings on the planet?” He rested his hand dramatically towards his heart, as if the sentence had hitted him there, his partner just rolled his eyes. “Prejudiced.”

“Science fiction works are, literally, the only database I have access about beings from other planets.”

“Rude. You have access to the memories of our past months, don’t you? Use that, guardian angel.”

The android pondered, slightly agreeing before took a battery and putting its in his mouth, absently sucking the electricity.

“What are we going to do now?”

“Well, first of all: mechanic and then… shopping!” Threw his hands up excitedly. “You need some djustes in your appearance to them not recognize us, and I’m not going to survive my fugitive life with just a couple of clothes!”

“Androids don’t go to mechanics, we have…” His protest was promptly ignored by the other.

“We also going to need a place to live, but that we can see that later.” Turned happily to the other, sparkling eyes. “And you need a name, Guardian Angel.”

“A name?”

“Yeah. Everyone has one, you should get one too, right?”

He smiled. Yes, he should.

“I’ll think about it.”

“I’m going to sleep.”

The bus followed through the sand trail, going at a slower speed, however almost finding no holes, letting the only movements to be a calm rocking from the vehicle. It wasn’t raining at that perimeter, just windy strong enough that even the duo away from the window could feel it. They closed their eyes, managing to capture without a lot of effort the sound of nocturnal crickets singing and jumping around. Mathias again leaned against the other, leading both to relaxed.

“You can rest, I get the night shift.”

“Humpf.” Amused snort, taking off his coat and clumsy putting on them in order to cover at least a little of them. “You, guardian angels, are always SO exaggerated.”

“Good night, Matheus.”

‘Night.’ Replied the other, telepathically.

[sunflowershayne]

mortal kombat au

bc i’m a dumb thot that’s severely attached to MK and smosh so.... uwu

ian hecox: liu kang. one of the most recognizable characters, generally considered the “hero” of the MK universe, one of the most powerful human characters, has fire magic and idk i just strongly relate ian to fire sometimes. also very fiercely protective of those he cares about, and will do whatever he can to help others. stubborn and vengeful, even when it can be petty.

noah grossman: ermac. has probably stolen at least 1,000 souls in his lifetime, has an unspeakable aura, has green magic (weed), has that one fatality where he takes out your stomach and noah is v picky so it fits i think. currently has free will and chooses his battles in self-preservation, and wants what’s best for his home and the world he grew up in. has a very strong connection to family due to having the former outworld king’s soul inside of him.

olivia sui: skarlet. is a very strange little creature with an obsession for others’ blood, one of the most powerful girls in the MK universe due to her magic, has the potential to take everything over but just wants approval. is also incredibly brutal but in a subtle way, has an ethereal and almost elegant way to her. basically i just see them both as weird gremlin women with insane amounts of power.

keith leak jr.: kung lao. very close with liu kang, iconic hat, is one of the more mundane humans due to not having a power, but is just as formidable as other kombatants due to his rage and his sheer knowledge of fighting. has a legacy he wants to live up to (the great kung lao is kinda like kung lao sr. right?), and is protective of his family (the shaolin monks). is generally more pissed off than liu kang.

courtney miller: cassie cage. sassy wlw (cassie’s not a confirmed wlw but like... come on, she’s. not straight), has latent magic within her, strong ties to her family, doesn’t rely on her power to fight with others despite being able to. strong badass woman that supports others, literally could kill a man by kicking them in the nuts. uwu-loving, selfie-taking, snapchat-filtering, ass-kicking lady that takes no prisoners.

shayne topp: johnny cage. muscular blond actor that is not-so humble about how they perceive themselves, very jokey and sarcastic, REFERENCES REFERENCES REFERENCES, pop culture, will flirt with anyone if it means he can be out of danger. consistently shirtless, but also incredibly loyal and steadfast, and has a very good heart. will do ANYTHING for his family and friends, including defeat a literal elder god in combat.

lasercorn: scorpion. fire man made of vengeance and anger, loves his clan more than anything, literal hellspawn, has a thing for sub-zero, is actually just a skull under a ninja mask, has actual flame hair, impulsive and has a short fuse. wants nothing more than to avenge his family and clan, and does absolutely anything he can to make sure that he gets what he wants. becomes besties with sub-zero (more than besties but like.... i’m not gonna say it Out Loud lest Ed Boon come murder me in my sleep!!!!!!!!)

jovenshire: erron black. gunslingin’ rowdy boy that tries to flirt with unsuccessful results, has his own interests and goals in mind when he makes decisions, chooses battles based on how much he can gain from each possibility. listens to country music and unironically does the boot-scootin’ boogie, has strong beliefs that people are allowed to make their own decisions and do what they want. a strangely coy and erotic cowboy.

mari takahashi: kitana. ethereal princess of an entire realm, goes from wanting to please others to making her own decisions and being loyal to herself, can kill a man with just a kiss, is besties (i mean in canon they’re dating but like. Not Here!!!!) with liu kang. has hopes for the future, will do whatever it takes to prevent bad things from happening, surprisingly very violent despite being so nice.

sohinki: sub-zero. generally a chill guy that will kick your ass mercilessly when given the chance, may or may not be lasercorn’s true enemy, initially was kind of a strict dude but now he’s just chill and wants to have a good time. always seems to show up whenever others need him, and basically just takes things in stride. all around good addition to a team, but can be stubborn and unmoving.

wes johnson: mileena. very giddy at first, but calms down a bit later on, desperately wants to be considered part of a family, has a strong temper and craves some sort of control, wants stability and prosperity for themselves. proud of their accomplishments and are always looking for people to acknowledge them, big eaters. is like a younger sibling that pesters you for candy. more powerful than they know.

boze: sonya blade. no-nonsense, won’t hesitate bitch, will kill you within a moment’s notice if you cross her, strong and independent with a soft spot for her friends, idk i just really associate boze with army green, was almost definitely a very emo teen. expects a lot from cassie but loves her with all her heart, is ride or die, ambitious and knows what she wants. go-getter through and through.

damien haas: kenshi. is almost definitely a psychic, values honor, besties with shayne, is a GOOD DAD!!!!!!! (fuck mkx’s portrayal of kenshi as a father tbh!!!!!!! takeda deserves better and SO DOES KENSHI!), is 1000% a cat person, has telekinesis probably, kitanas. knows a lot of shit, is lowkey shady af, helps scorpion in the new timeline (which... damien and lasercorn are... mind brothers), helps the Kombat Kids train bc they need it

flitz: kotal kahn. sun god, can and will turn into a lion at any moment, probably just glows sometimes for fun, is real into jade (which. aren’t we all.), is less interested in conquering and more into internal affairs and uniting people, proud of his body (bc kotal’s always shirtless, y’know.), would definitely drink blood for youth and sustenance. is able to teleport and has telekinesis, but it’s just w/e y’know!

rhett & link: raiden. the protector(s) of earthrealm and savior of the MK storyline, all-powerful immortal gods, are like WAY too fucking tall, did i mention that raiden is an elder god and that rhett & link literally saved our asses? gods, truly.

defy executives: shang tsung. old-ass, musty-ass, soul-stealing bitch, is liu kang’s arch-nemesis, brought sindel back to life which literally almost killed everyone in the MK timeline until they were brought back due to the time shenanigans. fuckin’ dusty soul-grabbing bastards that don’t even have good fatalities smh.