#basically the girl saw a reflection of Art all the way from the garden or something we live on the second for by the way

[makotoscoffee]

had another nightmare about Art the Clown😔

[theclockworkmonk]

Cultural Exchange

Written for @kataang-week

Day 2: Blending Cultures

Words: 2,009

Read on AO3

Read on FF.net

Summary: Katara has some selfish reasons for encouraging Aang to explore Fire Nation culture.

*******

Katara was starting to get worried as she walked up to Zuko's old family house on Ember Island. The outdoor furniture was smashed and splintered, and the door was ajar, hanging off its hinges. She sped up, beginning to panic, and ran up the stairs onto the porch.

She threw the door all the way open forcefully. "Hello!? Aang?"

She was greeted by a chorus of pained male groans.

"Close the door!" Haru wailed, shielding his eyes from the bright morning light that was now flooding the front room of the house. All the other young men, basically every male friend their group had made since leaving the South Pole, gave similar cries of distress from where they were strewn haphazardly across sofas and armchairs.

Katara sighed in relief, but then grew annoyed at the boys for scaring her. Instead of closing the door, she moved to the windows and threw all the curtains open.

"You're evil!" moaned Te'o from the floor, where he had fallen out of his chair.

"What exactly happened to those plans for a laid back, calm bachelor party?" Katara asked the room harshly, "How did it go? 'Oh don't worry, Katara, Zuko's not one to throw wild parties!'"

"Uggghhh, I"m not, but I'm friends with a lot of bad influences," came a weak voice from under a coffee table.

Katara laughed at the sight of the soon-to-be-married Firelord crawling out from under the table, looking like he had been put through a dozen successive Agni Kais. But her laughter died and she gasped when she saw what was on Zuko's head.

"Zuko, what happened!?"

"What does it look like? Your brother got us drunk."

"No, I mean what happened to your hair!"

Katara bent all the water from a nearby vase and froze it into a flat, shiny mirror, and held it up to Zuko's face. His eyes widened in horror and he leapt to his feet, upending the table.

All of his hair had been reduced to a narrow strip down the center of his head. That hair had been left long, and was tied back, but both sides of it had been shaved down to his scalp.

He recognized this look. It was exactly the way Sokka had his hair when Zuko had first encountered him.

"Aw Zuko, I'm touched!" crooned Katara dramatically. "Showing your support for rebuilding Southern Tribe culture by sporting a warrior's wolf tail!"

Zuko stared in disbelief at his reflection. He raised his shaking hands to the sides of his face.

"I look like I stuck my head between two grinding stones," Zuko muttered.

"Oh, don't say that, I'm sure once the Firelord is seen sporting this hairdo at his wedding, it will be all the rage across the Fire Nation," said Katara with a grin.

Zuko buried his face in his hands. "Oh, spirits, the wedding! Mai's going to kill me."

Katara was about to agree, but was interrupted by a scream of anguish and horror coming from the bathroom.

Katara and Zuko both bolted across the room and down the hall. She whipped out her bending pouch, ready to slice the door open, but lucky it was still unlocked. She kicked the door open and her blood froze in fear again as she saw Sokka doubled over, his face buried in the sink and his hands over his head.

"Sokka, what's wrong!?" asked Katara urgently, placing her hands on her brother's back. "Are you hurt—oh…."

She jumped back and gasped when Sokka turned to face her, his lip quivering.

He was completely bald, with a crude painted blue arrow leading from the back of his head, ending between his eyebrows.

Katara's chuckle at Zuko's expense was nothing compared to the explosion of laughter that erupted out of her now. She had to put a hand on the wall to steady herself as she shook until she was out of breath.

"Well, it was just a regular festival of cultural exchange last night, wasn't it?" she squeaked out.

"This isn't funny, Katara!" said Sokka desperately. "You don't understand, it's not coming off! It's real! And my hair! Next time I visit home, my brain is gonna freeze!"

"Oh, calm down," she said dismissively. She grabbed her brother's cheeks and pulled him down to inspect his new body art. "There's no inflammation on the skin, it's not a real tattoo. You just found some...wow, really durable face paint."

She looked him in the eye suspiciously. "Where did you get this stuff?"

"Uuuuhhh," said Sokka uncertainly. He turned to Zuko. "Where did we get this stuff?"

"Uuuuhhh," Zuko concurred.

Katara rolled her eyes. "Seriously? You don't even remember last night?"

"I can remember most of it," said Zuko defensively. "Things just get a little fuzzy after that bottle of moonpeachshine got opened. He was the one who brought that, so really this is all his fault."

"Hey, I don't remember tying you up and forcing the stuff down your throat, Lord Lots o' Shots," replied Sokka.

"Where's Aang?" Katara suddenly said, her grin wiped from her face.

For a moment, they just looked at each other in silence, then ran through the house again.

After searching the whole house and not finding Aang, Katara was beginning to panic again. But when she checked the back garden, she found Appa there sleeping soundly. A lumpy mass was sitting on the bison's head: a human body, the top half covered by a blanket, but long legs protruded from underneath, with blue arrows ending at the feet.

"Aang!" Katara called as she ran towards him, and thankfully the tattooed feet stirred. Aang slowly sat up, squeezing his eyes shut at the sunlight as the blanket fell from his face.

"Oh come on!" Katara sighed in relief. "You too?"

"What?" he mumbled, getting his bearings. He reached up to scratch his head, and discovered what was itching him.

Aang was wearing a wig. Avatar Aang, the mightiest being in the world, was hungover with a lopsided wig of black hair glued to his head. The foreign hair was pulled back into a knot that was contained by what Katara recognized as Avatar Roku's old hairpin.

Aang reached up and felt the hairpin, and winced. "Oh Spirits, I had hoped that was a dream."

"So you actually remember what happened?" asked Zuko, joining them outside along with Sokka, who had put a hat on to avoid getting sunburned.

"Well last night, Sokka got excited by this idea of me wearing Roku's hairpin at the wedding, as a sign of the Fire Nation's commitment to the Avatar and the balance of the world. I wasn't as intoxicated as he was, so I pointed out to him that one needs hair in order to wear a hairpin crown."

"Oh yeah!" said Sokka, remembering now, "Seems like a short sighted fashion decision."

"It's not short-sighted, that's the point," said Zuko irritably, "When royals or generals suffer a great defeat, they cut their hair off. The crowns of the Fire Lord and Prince are designed so that you can't wear them unless you've gone long enough without a defeat to have enough hair to wear it."

"Yeah, you said all this last night," said Aang. "Then Sokka suggested that I could borrow some hair, and we asked who would have extra hair to borrow, and that's how we ended up partying with the—"

"The Ember Island Players," Zuko finished in horror. "Oh, kill me now, this is going to be the subject of their worst play yet."

"I certainly hope so," said Katara. "I'll be there opening night."

"The wig and the facepaint….seemed like a good idea at the time," finished Aang painfully.

"Well if this stuff doesn't come off my face soon, then the Firelord is going to have to have them interrogated about how they undo it," said Sokka.

"Oh I will?" asked Zuko, raising his eyebrow. "The way I see it, I just have a bad haircut, I didn't put any crap on my head, so you can go begging for them on your own."

"It is not a bad haircut!" said Sokka angrily. "You're now the best looking guy here, saving my dignity is the least you can do."

"I might need help getting this thing off me too," mumbled Aang, futilely pulling at the wig. "And we should probably put this back in a safe spot."

He detached Roku's hairpin crown from his knot, and Katara gasped as his hair (that wasn't actually his hair) fell from it.

The messy black hair fell to the base of his neck, covering his ears and hanging in bangs over his forehead, partially obscuring his eyes. He scrunched his face in annoyance and brushed the hair away from his face. Katara felt her face grow hot as she watched her boyfriend's fingers run through the hair, and an image floated up in her mind of her fingers replacing them.

Zuko and Sokka went back into the house, Zuko cheekily offering to melt the facepaint off of Sokka, and promised to keep most of his face intact, as Aang climbed down off of Appa, still pulling at the mop glued to his head.

"I need to find a way to get this thing off me," Aang grumbled. "It won't stay out of my face, people can't see my arrow."

"Well, we can't have that," Katara chuckled. "The world can't know that the last airbender has broken such an important air nomad requirement as the sacred chrome dome."

"Well, it's not a requirement," said Aang, "but I still suspect I look far too much like Zuko for my taste—"

"Wait, really?" Katara cut him off, her eyes widening.

"Well you tell me. I don't have a mirror, but I suddenly feel the urge to sulk and reclaim my honor— "No, I mean, shaving your head isn't a requirement or anything?" Katara asked quickly.

Aang seemed surprised by her question. "Uh... no. Most of the boys did anyway, because it gives you a slight edge in airbending, since your skin is in tune with the air currents. We all had to shave it once, when we got our arrows, but most girls grew it back."

He continued to fidget with the wig as he started walking back towards the house, seemingly oblivious to the blush creeping up his girlfriend's face.

Katara tried to act casual as she fell in step with Aang and linked her arm with his.

"Sooooo...hypothetically speaking," she began, not looking at him, "you could have a full head of hair. If you wanted to."

Aang shrugged. "Yeah. But I've never really felt the desire to. With hair, you have to wash it, and there's so many different haircuts to pick from, it's easier to just shave it in the morning."

He turned to look at her curiously. "Why?"

"Oh, no reason!" she said innocently.

They walked in silence for a few seconds, then a strong morning breeze blew past them and Katara felt her knees grow weak as Aang's messy "hair" whipped in the wind, dancing around his handsome face beautifully, in a way his real hair had never grown long enough to do.

"I was just thinking Sokka might be onto something!" she blurted out before she could stop herself. "You know, about wearing Roku's crown. Maybe the Avatar adopting a few Fire Nation fashions will placate a few of the naysayers, who say that you're a foreign interloper. It will show them that you're their Avatar too. It would be a great exchange and blending of cultures, to reflect peaceful cooperation."

Aang frowned thoughtfully. "Well, I….guess that kind of makes sense." He shrugged and chuckled. "I'm still definitely going to get this hair off me, though. Then I can decide whether to start growing my own."

"Hmmm….yeah," Katara whispered greedily under her breath, "I bet that'll look even hotter."

"Hmm? What was that? I didn't hear you."

"Nothing!" she squeaked, and ran back into the house.

[jonathanvik]

Starlight Dream - Chapter 11

“You’re making little sense,” Kion said, crossing her tiny arms. “Why would being good grant a magical girl greater power?”

 “I’m not explaining myself well,” Nier replied, trying to gather his thoughts. “Do some properties of certain girls grant them greater potential as a magical girl?”

 Kion shook her head. “I’ve trained plenty of recruits, but they almost always start around the same level. Some girls have more potent abilities, but that’s all.”

 “Magical girls need to feed on despair and hatred to gain any real power. It takes years to cultivate a suitable amount of strength.” Haruko, Kion’s partner, said.

 Together, the pair served as magical girl recruitment officers. They provided recruits with basic training in their powers and taught them the magical girl’s sacred mission.

 “Yeah.” Nier winced, hearing the subtle barb against his partner. Takako had never shown much interest in causing suffering, stunting her development as a magical girl. They’d become magical girls around the same time, and Haruko loved rubbing in her higher station.

 Unlike most magical girls, Haruko stood almost 160 centimeters tall with broad shoulders, appearing several years older than the rest of her magical girl brethren. She kept her orange hair in a sporty bob and wore a tracksuit when not transformed. Since becoming a magical girl, she’d quickly risen high in the ranks, becoming an esteemed lieutenant of the Devil Princesses.

 As usual, Starlight Dream was a hive of activity, Nier watched as magical girls went about their business. Despite the magical girl’s reputation for violence and cruelty, the buildings they occupied were beyond splendor, each a unique art piece. Their multifaceted crystal walls reflected light in dazzling, breathtaking ways. Across the city were gardens of flowers collected from countless worlds with hues beyond imagination. Out the window of Kion’s office, Nier saw the royal castle towering high into the sky. Its size was beyond measure and extended into infinity. Legend said it was the pin holding all of reality together.  

 It was a delightful, sunny day. Unlike most worlds, Starlight Dream had a unique sky. Above them were countless specks representing different universes. Starlight Dream existed in a nexus between worlds. The multiverse itself rotated around Starlight Dream, not unlike planets did around stars.

 “What, have you found a special case?” Haruko said, sipping a soft drink. “I don’t recall authorizing any fairies to leave Starlight Dream recently. Did someone sneak out to cause some mischief again?”

 The magical girls strictly regulated what fairies could have partners[1] . They didn’t want their power falling into unworthy hands. It didn’t stop some fairies from sneaking away anyway, but this was uncommon. Most dare not risk Haruko’s wrath.

 Kion rolled her eyes and groaned. “Do I need to smash some heads together again? I’ve told them a million times to never leave without permission!”

 “Well, who is it? What kind of partner did they find? Another milksop? The last few candidates have been pretty piss poor. Like that Himari girl.” Haruko gave an involuntary groan. “Centuries ago, magical girls were true terrors. I swear, younger fairies these days are complete wusses.”

 His audience gave him an expectant look, and Nier hesitated. Takako would kill him if he told anyone about Seina. Seina was her prey and no one else. She’d complain for centuries if anybody else stole her kill.

 But Haruko expected an answer, and Nier didn’t dare refuse. Perhaps he could muddy the truth somewhat? “Have you heard of a fairy named Colten?”

 “Nope, never heard of him,” Haruko said after some consideration. “Is he one of the failures?”

 Kion’s face twisted into a scowl. “Him? I’ve never seen a fairy with less appetite for carnage. His parents have written me many concerned letters about him. Want me to help toughen him up.” Rightfully so. Nier understood well what happened to fairies that didn’t measure up. They ended up dead.

 “You’re telling me Colten has a partner?” Haruko asked.

 “Impossible!” Kion almost laughed in incredulity. ���He has no talent! Besides, only exceptional fairies can form bonds. Colten is a failure unworthy of licking my paws!”

 Nier nodded in agreement. It baffled him how a pathetic excuse for a fairy like Colten bonded with a partner. A flash of inspiration struck Nier. It would avoid any awkward questions about Seina.

 “But don’t worry about Colten and his partner. Takako executed their sorry hides. A single rogue fairy can’t change much.” Nier gave a knowing smirk. “But there was something unusual about them. They had unnatural strength beyond their years and experience. I’m trying to uncover why. If Takako hadn’t killed them, they might have eventually become a genuine threat. We can’t allow another repeat of Colten’s partner.”

 Kion nodded in thanks. “You saved us a great deal of hassle. Searching the cosmos for delinquent fairies is a royal pain.”

 “Still, that’s odd,” Haruko said, her voice thoughtful. “You’re telling me she tried using her powers for good? And it made her stronger? That’s impossible.”

 “It confuses me too.” Kion beamed as an idea struck her. “But I might have a lead. Your story reminded me of something.”

 “Oh?” Nier had already checked the old archives but found nothing useful. It mostly contained epic tales of famous magical girls. They sang the Devil Princesses’ praise and their countless glorious genocides, laughing at the foes who’d dare oppose them. Curiously, the archive had nothing about magical girls that hadn’t been pure evil.[2]  Seina couldn’t have been the only magical girl in history that hadn’t taken a dark path.

 “There’s one good fairy that still exists,” Kion said.

 Haruko raised an eyebrow. “You’re telling him about Charity? Isn’t she supposed to be a secret?”

 “It’s worth a try. Besides, she hardly matters anymore. She isn’t a threat to anyone anymore.”

 “Wait, who is Charity?” Nier’s eyes budged in astonishment. Another good fairy?

 “She’s ancient. She lived during an era before the Devil Princesses.” Kion said. “We’ve had her imprisoned ever since.”

 A time before the Devil Princesses? Stories told a time long since passed when a powerful, wicked queen ruled Starlight Dream. She had used her magic to brainwash fairies into her hapless slaves. Fairykind slaved away to the queen’s whims until the Devil Princesses had saved them. It allowed fairies to act according to their true nature, bringing terror to where they walked. It surprised him that anything still remained from that era.

 “Were there magical girls back during the queen’s era?” Nier asked. The power to bond with a magical girl was a rare, but innate ability every fairy possessed. He supposed even his brainwashed ancestors had that power.

 “It’s possible,” Kion replied. “But I doubt you’ll get anything useful from her. She hasn’t spoken a word in centuries. She’s totally deluded, mad. It’d be a miracle if you even get a coherent word from her.”

 “I’ll try, anyway.” Still, it disturbed Nier that an abhorrent creature like Charity still lived. Her entire existence contradicted the fairy’s true nature.

 “Don’t tell anyone else about Charity.” Kion’s voice contained a warning. “You know the consequences of disobedience.”

 Nier gave a nervous laugh. “Of course. My lips are sealed!”

 Still, he’d finally uncovered a solid lead. He wondered what magical girls were like before the Devil Princesses, though he doubted they were anything special. After all, goodness was weakness. The old queen would have won otherwise. While it seemed likely Seina was only a fluke, Nier swore he’d see the matter through. He couldn’t allow anything to threaten the Devil Princesses.

 ---

 After extending a hand, Seina’s staff appeared within it. She glanced towards her friend with an expectant look. “Okay, what now?”

 “Now Takako says you need to channel your anger and hatred into your weapon,” Aiko said. “The rest should come through instinct.”

 “She might be right!” Colten said, nodding. “Magical Girls gain power through their emotions. Although I never considered using it to power magic.”

 Mr. Kiyojiro stroked his chin in thought. “Use your parents’ betrayal. That should provide more than enough ammunition.”

 “Okay.” Seina squeezed her staff hard and thought about every indignation she’d suffered throughout her brief life. Instead of her parents, Seina recalled a girl she’d become friends with while clipping away a stone wall with a pickaxe. They’d talked for hours in hushed conversation, laughing amongst themselves. A couple of days later, a vampire killed her for sport. Seina had cried herself to sleep for days afterward.

 This is for you, Hikari! She pictured the girl’s murderer in her mind’s eye. Blinding hot fury filled her, channeling it into her staff. Yet, something felt wrong. Instead of feeling powerful and vindicated, those emotions only twisted her insides, filling her with guilt and ugliness.

 “This isn’t working.” Seina had loathed touching the hatred she’d buried deep inside her. She didn’t want to live in anger. Instead, she wanted to move beyond her painful past and live her life in peace. Didn’t she deserve it after everything she’d suffered?

 Mr. Kiyojiro grunted in frustration. “Another dead end.”

 “No!” Colten brightened and flipped in the air. “How about trying the opposite instead? Use, I don’t know, your feelings for me instead!”

 Seina nodded and focused on the day Colten had first met her instead. It brought warmth to her heart. Colten had protected her from Dreven, regardless of the risk to himself. Words couldn’t describe the gratitude she felt towards her friend and partner.

 “Look!” Aiko said, amazed.

 From the round opening on Seina’s staff, a tiny bubble blew out. It floated lazily into the air, bobbing with the wind.

 “It worked!” Colten laughed in utter delight.

 “Congratulations!” Aiko beamed with joy.

 Seina, however, wasn’t as enthusiastic, staring at the bubble with a sour expression. “It’s not really what Takako can do, is it?” Her rival’s magic seemed almost endless in its power and versatility. And Siena was stuck with bubbles.

 Mr. Kiyojiro gave a forlorn sigh. “Maybe magic isn’t Seina’s strong point.”

 “You might be right.” Siena pressed a finger against the bubble and it popped not unlike a normal bubble. It didn’t even explode or anything.

 Dang, it. My weapon really is just a bubble blower, isn’t it? It was a painful truth she’d avoided until now.

 “No!” Colten said, fuming. He refused to allow his partner to speak ill of herself. “I bet it’s super useful. We just haven’t learned how yet!”

 “It’s possible,” Aiko tapped her chin. “I bet it’s like Seina! Deceptively cute, but dangerous!”

 “I guess.” Seina supposed it won’t hurt to continue experimenting with her magical powers. Still, bubbles? What kind of weapon was that?

 “I should ask Takako to try this method. It might make her magic even stronger!” Aiko said.

 This brought a smile to Seina’s face. “She’d probably think it was lame or something. It isn’t really her style.” This brought a smile to Mr. Kiyojiro’s face too, though one slightly nastier. He thought this revelation would give Seina another useful edge over the girl.

 “Speaking of Takako. Aiko, have you found her a master yet?” Colten asked.

 “I have.” A mischievous smile appeared on Aiko’s face. “But it’s a secret. I can’t have you stealing Takako’s new master right from under her nose.”

 Seina rolled her eyes. “Sure.”

 “We’re going there today,” Aiko said, becoming more serious. “It will be quite the journey. It will take a couple of days.”

 “What’s this new master like?” Mr. Kiyojiro said with intense interest.

 Aiko winced. “I’ve heard he’s temperamental. He’s the master of an ancient secret martial art that’s almost two thousand years old. Should be interesting to convince him.”

 Mr. Kiyojiro crossed his arms and smiled. “This might finally convince the girl to listen to someone. If she wants to beat Seina, she needs to master herself first.”

 “I hope so,” Aiko said, voice strained.

 “Well, I pray for her success,” Seina said, meaning every word.

  I hope you can find what you’re looking for, Takako. I believe you have great potential for good. You only need the right push. It gave her greater hope for other magical girls, also. A girl could dream, right?

 ---

 “You’re the only visitor we’ve gotten in forever.” Cerbi, the fairy guard, said. “Even the Devil Princesses have forgotten about our special prisoner.”

 “Really?” Nier said, surprised. “How long has she been imprisoned?”

 “Almost 800 years.” The guard fairy’s partner, Azumi, said.

 Nier gapped in surprise. “800?! How is she still alive?” Normally, partnerless fairies lived for around 90 years.

 “Beats me.” Cerbi shrugged. “You should have seen what Reiko did to the prisoner. Tortured her for almost five days straight. Barely anything remained of the prisoner afterward.”

 A shudder went down Nier’s spine. The Devil Princesses weren’t anyone you wanted to trifle with. Reiko Yoshida, in particular, was infamous for her ill-temper. “I imagine she learned what she sought?” Nier knew how unwise it was to inquire into the Devil Princesses’ business.

 A smirk grew on Azumi’s mouth. “Of course. Reiko’s particular power made it pretty easy. Better yet, it didn’t even leave a drop of blood to clean up.”

 Yep, it’s a good thing I’ll never need to worry about crossing the Devil Princesses. Still, it made him curious how Charity was still even alive.

 After entering a key into a lock, Azumi pushed open the cell door. “Help yourself.” Neir’s breath caught as he peered into the cell. It look a moment for her eyes to adjust to the gloom, the room was a roughly six foot cube made from cold stone. There seemed to be some sort of carving on the walls.“She is watching. She sees everything. She is all.” Read Nier, the words were repeated over almost every square centimeter of the stone walls.

 “What?” Nier’s eyes widened, taking stock of his surroundings.

 “The prisoner started doing it after Reiko left. It’s all we’ve ever gotten out of her.” Cerbi said in the deafening silence.

 Huddled in the corner was a fairy with her eyes closed. She didn’t move or respond when Neir entered the cell. Much to his dismay, nothing was binding or restraining Charity. If she suddenly became violent, Neir had nothing to protect himself. He began questioning the wisdom of entering this crazed fairy’s cell. Much to his horror, the door slammed behind him.

 “Good luck!” Cerbi smirked, giving a sardonic wave. Both guards leaned against a wall, eager to watch what would happen next. They wanted a show, and Nier was their hapless star.

 “Uh, hi!” Nier said with forced cheerfulness. “I was wondering if I might ask you a few questions!” Much to his relief and annoyance, the prisoner didn’t respond. He tried again.

 “My name is Nier, Charity. I wanted to ask you about the magical girls before the Devil Princesses. What were they like? I’ve searched for information about them, but came up empty. You’re my best lead to find some answers.”

 Again, nothing. Out of nervousness, Nier started rambling. “Though I don’t see why they’d be any stronger. After all, the Devil Princesses easily slaughtered them. But I’m curious if they had any special abilities?”

 His mind returned to Seina’s bizarre bubble blower staff. It was unlike any other magical girl weapon he’d seen before. It looked like a toy, a joke, but its power wasn’t. Were other magical girl weapons like that before the Devil Princesses? He worried it might contain some hidden power. Charity’s only reply was more silence. Her body didn’t even twitch, and Cerbi and Azumi watched with disappointment.

 “Why am I even worried about this? Takako probably has already killed her. Seina is such a useless girl. So what if she has some strange weapon and weird strength? She’s nothing compared to the might of true magical girls.”

 Nier let out a high-pitched scream when Charity turned her head, staring him right in the eye. A bizarre, wide smile appeared on her face, amused by something only she could understand.

 “Is that right?” Charity’s voice was rough from not speaking for several centuries. “Charity knows much and thinks you are blind to reality. Already, fate is shifting, and the Devil Princesses are slowly losing their grip.”

 “Sorry?” Nier fought to keep his voice from quavering.

 “You say one fairy can’t make a difference.” Charity continued. “But a single act of kindness can change fate. Charity knows this. She told Charity. She sees all.”

 “You’re not making any sense.” Finding himself pressed against the far wall of the cell Nier tried to pierce the mad fairy’s gibbering but understood nothing.

 Charity broke into uproarious laughter. “Go, little fairy. But will your fate be the same when you return?”

 “Yeah, I’m leaving now. You’re delusional.” Nier said, trying to keep his cool. His mind screamed he should flee as quickly as possible. Coming here had been a terrible mistake.

 “I’m done. Let me out.” Nier resisted the urge to slam against the cell door, urging the guards to move quicker. He watched the grinning Charity from the corner of his eye, fearful she might attack him.

 “Okay.” Even Cerbi sounded unnerved by the exchange. Much to Nier’s relief, he left the cell without issue.

 “Damn. What was that about? We’ve struck and insulted her countless times and didn’t even get a peep from her.” Azumi said.

 “Change fate. What was that about?” Cerbi exchanged a glance with his partner. “Regardless, we’ll keep a close eye on her. You better return to your partner.”

 “Thanks for showing me around.” Nier forced a smile. A growing sense of dread twisted his insides. While he’d know if something happened to Takako, Charity’s words worried him.

 What am I worried about? This is Takako we’re talking about. She’s too lazy to change her fate! She’s probably lounging around and reading manga right now! Still, he hurried his steps and quickly opened a portal to Seina’s universe.

So where do fairies come from? Are they native to the dream?

Not all that surprising if team evil is currently in charge

[hopiewrites]

Nobody - OHSHC

NOTE: big, big thank you to the person helping me write this fic, LT! i don’t think they have a tumblr so here is a link to their quotev!

pairing - host club x reader

ongoing series, chapter 3

word count - 4,180

chapters 1 & 2 up now!

-> back to masterlist

03

Forget-me-not Blue

Weeks had passed, and the daffodils began to bloom, welcoming spring into season that April.

(Y/N) was excited, even if things were barely starting to come to life. The early spring flowers had arrived, and that meant the butterflies and bees would start dancing around again, and the cherry blossoms would bloom, and everything would be alight with new life and begin the new year with vibrancy. She couldn't wait until she was able to walk through Ouran's gardens that would be full of roses and lavender and dandelions.

It seemed that the entire school shared her excitement, as the whole campus was vibrating with excitement and joy. The colors seemed brighter and the sky seemed clearer and the spring air was crisp and clean, brushing it's hands through the trees that were budding with new leaves and fruits.

All was well that day. (Y/N) got to spend time with her mother that morning before she had to run off to work, managed to remember all of her school supplies, and even got to finish her makeup on time; she was wearing one of her favorite outfits, a cherry wood brown turtleneck and a pleated plaid skirt, paired with the dirty vans she always wore.

She stayed late yesterday to make the food beforehand instead of going in early that morning, so she managed to get two extra hours of sleep, and felt relatively rested.

She decided that the day was good.

Everybody in homeroom was chatting amongst themselves, as usual, while cute drawings of different characters and flowers adorned the whiteboard with little phrases and words next to them. Her head was low as she entered, quietly making a beeline towards her usual desk and pulling out her notebook.

Something scrunched under her papers.

The girl moved her notebook, curious brows raised, and there, on her desk, sat a yellow sticky note, with a sun wearing sunglasses and a little daisy sitting around the neat, swirly handwriting that read;

Come to the club room after classes, We have planning to do~

Just when she thought she'd gotten away from them, they pulled her right back into their grubby hands.

She sighed, trying to hide the slight grin that made it's way to her face. She propped her head up on one hand, staring blankly at the whiteboard at the front of the room.

I wonder what's going on this time.

It wasn't long before everyone got settled and into their seats. Now, all she had to do, was wait.

- nobody -

Everyone is so lively today.

Even more so than usual, the host club's atmosphere was effervescent, seeming to bubble over with what she assumed was excitement – even the guests were basically dancing in their seats.

"So, Kyoya! When will the annual Spring Dance be held this year?"

"Yeah! Everybody has been talking about it already, we're all so excited!"

"Well, ladies, we plan to have it soon, in early May. We're actually having preparations being made at this moment."

"Oh, wow, really!? We have to start looking at gowns, then!"

"Yes, we're looking forward to it! I wonder what the theme will be this year."

Spring Dance?

"That, my dears, is a surprise. Just know that all the hosts have worked very hard to find only the best decorations and catering for our guests."

They all swooned at Kyoya's smooth cut words, alight with his usual false cheeriness. He smiled at his guests politely, listening to their excited rambling.

Huh. I should've figured they would have one. Just slipped my mind. Maybe that's why they wanted me up here, to help with preparations?

"Oh, (N/N)-chan!!! You look so pretty!"

Almost knocked back by Honey's embrace, she hid a giggle, letting him hug her – now that it's been nearly a month, the timid girl has gotten used to her elder's childish mannerisms.

"Hello, senpai. Um, thank you!"

He laughed cutely before letting her go. "So you got Tama-chan's note? I wasn't sure if you'd come visit us today."

"Yeah, I almost didn't see it actual-"

"Oh, Princess! Welcome!"

Yet again, she was scooped up into a pair of arms, but this time, she was twirled around and around and around, before finally her feet touched the ground once more, a pair of warm hands on her shoulders.

Her cheeks were pink from that welcome, and head spinning after that twirl; she still wasn't used to Tamaki's bear hugs. As nice as they were, they always made her chest flutter and twist, as if, suddenly, the only thing that was there was warmth, and a rosy cinnamon scent that she could lose herself in.

(Y/N) smiled.

"Hi, Tamaki-senpai."

"I'm glad you came today! We have many things to discuss, like the-"

"Spring Dance?"

"Oh! Yes. I'm guessing you've heard?"

His hands fell from her shoulders, as his head tilted like that of a puppy, blonde hair shining like gold under the florescent lights that hung in chandeliers from the ceiling high above.

"Well, just now I heard some of Kyoya's visitors talking about it- oh, I think you have people waiting, senpai."

She nodded her head towards the girls waiting patiently with smiles on their pretty faces. The taller nods. "Yeah, I'll tell you more about it later, okay? So don't leave!"

"Okay, don't worry! I'll be right here."

He smiled once again before greeting his guests and walking with them to a table.

She took it upon herself to sit, folded up in a sofa situated at the back of the expansive room, and plugged her earbuds in to block out the chatter that echoed. Plucking her journal out from her bag, she balanced it on her knee, continuing a sketch she'd been working on recently–a myosotis plant, more commonly known as forget-me-not's.

Small flowers, known for their symbolism of faithful love and reminiscent feelings; their color, known as "true blue," was the color of trust, loyalty and truth. She chose these flowers for an assignment in her art class, the project being on symbolism in everyday objects.

She was a bit of a nerd for those kinds of things.

From beside the focused girl peered a curious ginger over her shoulder. A pair of honey eyes roamed across the paper, watching as her hand moved and twitched, careful yet messy in a way he hadn't really seen before.

"What're you drawing, (Y/N)?"

Music drowned out his words, earbuds nestled safely in her ears as she just continued what she was doing, unbothered.

He decided to tuck his voice away for now, watching the pencil as it dragged across the paper, quietly. He moved closer, a sheepish smile playing on his lips as he crouched, propping his arm on the armrest of the chair, head leaning close to the oblivious girl's shoulder.

He'd seen those flowers before, overflowing in the pots that sit right outside his mansion's front doors, serving as a welcome whenever he arrived home. He never realized how pretty they were until that moment.

Soon enough she turned the page, and from the corner of his eye he saw a nonchalant smile pull on her cheeks - she wrote a message in her book.

How long have you been spying on me?

Kaoru chuckled, then pulled out an earbud of hers.

"About five minutes now, actually."

"Hm. You're such a stalker, you know that?"

Closing her book she turned towards the younger twin, headphone swinging and smacking Kaoru in the face as she moved; she held back an embarrassed laugh.

"Those are forget-me-not's, right?" His head tilted, lights reflecting in his eyes like constellations.

She lit up. "Yeah. I'm just doing rough sketches for a project I'm working on... I'm pretty excited to start painting it."

"That's right!" The girl jumped at his exclamation, dropping her journal with a thud, "We've never seen your paintings before. When will you show us your winning masterpiece, (Y/-"

"What's this?"

Her cheap journal was plucked from the floor by slim hands, mischievous eyes studying the contents of the page that had revealed itself from the prior fall.

"Wai-"

"Ooh, I never took you as the obsessive type, (Y/N)."

Kaoru stood abruptly from his crouch and walked over to where his twin was in front of the poor girl, lips falling open, just a bit, just enough to suck in a breath he didn't know he needed.

"And for Tamaki, no less!"

Imprinted on the thin pages of her grimoire, was an unfinished portrait of none other than Tamaki Suoh, eyes sleepy and hair a mess, but a smile as bright as the very sun. You could feel the warmth he radiated through the page.

What took Kaoru by surprise was how much detail was put into the whole thing, even if it was a bit sloppy. It looked like it held every color in the world, even though the only thing that was there was the dull, grey lead of the pencil and bits of eraser shavings caught here and there.

She jumped up and tried to snatch it out of the taunting male's hands, though he just held it over her head.

She felt like crying; nobody was supposed to see that.

"What are you all doing?"

None other than the king himself asked, taking long strides towards the twins. Hikaru couldn't get enough of this. For one reason or another, he felt acid deep down in his stomach that bit at him from the inside, but on his tongue was the sweet taste of hell's fire, and he would deal with the burning of his conscience later.

"Seems like you have another fan, boss! Look at this."

Though, the girl wouldn't give up that easily. She jumped up once again, eyes glaring holes through the auburn's head, and a shiver crawled up his spine. He almost considered giving it back. Almost.

Tamaki was there now, and it felt like everything was in slow motion for her. Yeah, maybe she was being dramatic, but she couldn't help it. That was private and special to her, not to mention how embarrassed she'd be if he saw it.

(Y/N) disregarded how she was now chest-to-chest with Hikaru Hitachiin, and how pink dusted his cheeks as his eyes slanted down at her own ones in a silent declaration of war. The tips of her toes kissed the marble of Ouran's floors as she leaned against the much, much taller male in effort to get back what was rightfully hers, but he only stretched his arm out further, completely ignoring everyone else's presence in the now emptying room.

In that moment, nothing mattered to either of them. There was nothing else but each other and the mutual feeling of a bloody red.

...Save for the other club members of course, who watched the whole ordeal with amusement.

Kyoya sipped on his earl grey. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say Hikaru is flirting, wouldn't you agree?"

Haruhi's hand clasped over her mouth in an effort not to laugh. She hummed in silent agreement. "Yeah, I'd definitely say so."

"(Y/N), you drew this...?"

It was those words that were the rain that washed the fire to ashes,  though the biting heat lingered even when she pulled apart from Hikaru. His glare snapped to the wall as he avoided eye contact. Her skin was red with embarrassment and anger, blood boiling and burning her from the inside. The older twin only stood, arms crossed and eyebrows drawn together with an angry pout plastered on his rose petal lips.

Though, what she didn't know was that Hikaru was nauseous with the nasty aftertaste of guilt, pitchforks stabbing at his lungs, making it hard for him to do anything but clench his fists and bear it. He didn't care about how he made her feel. Why would he? She was just another one of Tamaki's stupid fangirls.

Right...?

He couldn't keep himself from glaring over at (Y/N) one last time.

- nobody -

Tamaki cleared his throat, clapping his hands together as all the hosts gathered and watched him.

"So, as many of you know, the annual spring dance is upon us, and we've already booked the grand hall for the ceremony."

(Y/N) listened curiously from her seat beside Mori, whom she felt safest by at the moment. He didn't ask questions; he didn't pry; he didn't do much of anything, really. His quiet presence was cooling against the fire raging red underneath her skin.

"I thought we should all gather to choose a theme. Last year's was royalty, and the decorations and dress code played off of that."

That's so like them. The girl grinned quietly to herself, finding their predictable nature entertaining. "Does anyone have any ideas?"

The girl hesitated, just for a moment, swallowing Hikaru's thorny glare like sour medicine.

"What about a vintage theme?" She spoke.

"Vintage theme...?" Tamaki questioned aloud, tilting his head slightly, just like she noticed he'd always do when thinking.

"Yeah. Like age old antiques, soft colors, lace, the like. Unless you've already done something like that, I mean.."

"No, no. Actually... That's a really good idea, (Y/N)," Kyoya flipped through his little black book, jotting down the girl's idea.

"Yeah. Sounds good."

(Y/N) shifted at the sudden voice beside her, quiet but not shy. Mori wasn't even looking at her, not sparing a single glance her way, his face bearing the same sea glass expression.

She took Mori's words to heart, those words he probably thought nothing much of. She then elaborated her thoughts, a little clearer, a little more confident.

"I think it would be really elegant, not to mention economical. We could maybe even visit a few antique shops for some of the decorations."

No one added anything in, silently willing her to continue.

"Soft colors, like cream and periwinkle and mauve would do. Maybe we can even make some kind of dress code."

Still, no one.

"...I don't know."

"That's a wonderful idea, (N/N)-chan!" Exclaimed Honey from his cozy seat on Mori's lap.

"Yeah, we've never done anything like that before. It could be really pretty," added Kaoru.

Kyoya chimed in, "Any other ideas?"

"Nope! I think this is what we're going for this year, my dear Kyoya!"

As the hosts scattered amongst themselves, Honey tucked his arms snugly around (Y/N)'s legs with a wide, sweet smile; too wide, too sweet. In the moment, though, the girl was caught up in catching butterflies in her stomach. They listened to me, she thought. Her hands subconsciously found their way around the short male's small frame, as they tended to these days.

"(N/N)-chan, do you wanna walk with us outside?"

A sheepish smile stretched her lips as she replied. "Can't, senpai. I have to prepare tomorrow's food."

"Oh, about that, (Y/N)."

Honey reluctantly loosened his hold and marched back to his tall companion. Kyoya stood at her side now, tucking his phone away safely into the pocket of his trousers.

She hummed, listening.

"We're not opening the club tomorrow, so you don't have to have anything ready. Just go home and get some rest."

(Y/N) turned her head to peer up at him. His eyes were unfocused, looking out at the blooming colors of spring outside the windows. She didn't understand what he was thinking or feeling, or if he was feeling anything at all for that matter.

In that moment, he reminded her of the darkness that separates the stars.

- nobody -

The walk home was full of life, unsurprisingly. Wildflowers and green grass lined the roads, honeybees buzzing happily as they kissed the flowers and danced with butterflies. There was still a few hours of the day left, judging by how the sun was strung in the sky, so instead she decided to walk to a local park. It was small and well-worn but very peaceful, with its rusty swings and small pond.

Ducks waddled around in and out of the water. Birds chirped back and forth in the few trees as a lady struggled to keep her small dog from chasing a poor squirrel scurrying around the base of an oak.

Settling on the swings, (Y/N) took a second to unwind. The wind was soft and carried the scent of wild roses as it soothed her skin. There were yellow daffodils happily swaying by the pond. Everything was okay in that moment.

In a swift movement the girl kicked off her shoes and hopped out of the swing, laughing at herself when she stumbled. The grass felt like silk on her callused feet as she stepped towards the large rose bush, crouching to smell its pink petals. Carefully, she plucked one, two, three, four roses and skipped away to gather a few daffodils, cattails, and dandelions.

For mom, when she gets home.

Right as she was about to steal a pinecone from its branch, her phone vibrated annoyingly in her pocket.

2 new messages from " the host club 👑✨💞"

Since when was I in a group chat??

Ignoring it, (Y/N) decided to check it out later. How did they even get her Instagram though? It didn't matter, she figured. She'd probably spent far too long at the park, anyway, if the creamy orange beginning to color the sky was any indication. It was time to head back home.

With all different kinds of plants gripped securely in her dirty hand, she retrieved her discarded shoes and gingerly walked back towards her neighborhood.

- nobody -

It wasn't until (Y/N) found herself sprawled across her bed and once more attempting to wrap-up her forget-me-not sketch that she remembered the notifications she had received from the host club prior.

The mixed bouquet of wild flowers she had managed to concoct was placed on her mother's nightstand, along with a note on which she had scrawled a short but sweet message the moment she arrived back home. Aside from that, the only things she had her mind set on were homework (regardless of how little she was assigned), dinner, and sleep. It's true, she was tired,  a bit hungry as well, but she still chose to squeeze in some relaxing time to comfortably let her pencil dance across the designated page within her journal.

It almost amazed her how lost in thought she would find herself whenever she decided to let her creative side flow as freely as it did. It's as if she would switch over to autopilot and let nothing but her hand take control while her mind soared with an intoxicated sort of vigor as it explored every idea that subconsciously came to her head.

It was for this exact reason that it took her several moments to register the lit-up screen of her phone lying atop the cluster of unmade sheets just inches away.

Setting down her pencil, (Y/N) diverted her attention to the rectangular device and awkwardly shifted positions before picking it up and unlocking it. The number of messages from earlier had since multiplied, a prominent 61 plastered on the corner of the application.

haruhi.fuji: Well I know of a few thrift shops around near my apartment. You can find all kinds of hidden gems there.

haruhi.fuji: Don't know about antique stores though, but (Y/N)-chan might know of some.

tama_king: Thrift stores????

(58 more messages)

The corners of her lips upturned just enough for her to notice.

She opened the app and scrolled through the messages, skimming through notifications and following each member back. Well, accept for Hikaru, who hadn't even followed her in the first place. Hesitantly, (Y/N) typed out a message, then deleted it, then typed it out again, then deleted it. The girl sighed, chewing on her cheek, trying to decide what to say.

tama_king: Look (Y/N)s online!!

Well, leave it to Tamaki to point her out. Said girl settled for a simple greeting.

(username): hi everyone!

haruhi.fuji: (Y/N), we were just talking about what kind of decorations we should get for the spring dance.

(username): oh, well i figured we could just go looking through local shops to find authentic antique decor

haruhi.fuji: Like all of us out shopping together??

tama_king: That sounds like fun we should go see all the commoner shops together!

(Y/N) suddenly had regrets. All eight of them, six of which all likely hadn't ever even heard of a thrift store before, out and about? Even if she was starting to grow used to the lot of them, it was a whole other thing to be seen out in public with them. It wasn't that (Y/N) was embarrassed of them, but more so bothered by how much attention they seem to bring towards themselves. The socially awkward girl wasn't sure if she could handle that very well.

(username): i mean, sure??

haruhi.fuji: That sounds... ;;;

(username): yeah ik, migjt not be the best of ideas i've had huh

(username): *might

She quietly laughed to herself, trying to shake off the dread that was already piling on her shoulders.

tama_king: No, it sounds like a great idea!!

The "Oh, what have I done," slipped past her lips as she saw none other than Kyoya himself finalize the plans.

KyoyaOotori: I see you three have been planning an outing?

KyoyaOotori: And when are we all going to do this?

It was funny, because she could practically feel him shaking his head through the screen. Maybe the two of them were more alike than she had originally thought.

She decided then that she might as well go through with it.

(username): well, earlier you said i didn't have to prep for tomorrows guests, so i'm free tomorrow after school.

tama_king: The host club was planned to be closed tomorrow for preparations to be made for the dance. i'm sure our lovely guests wouldn't mind. so Kyoya, is tomorrow okay to go out shopping?

KyoyaOotori: I suppose that it would be a good learning experience to see what low-budget commoner living is like. So, yes, that sounds just fine. I'll make sure to let the others know.

It looked like all had been settled, so she switched the device back off and let it sit to the side. The sound of the door clicking shut and the A/C being tampered with alerted the young girl of her mother's arrival home, so she skipped into the doorway to greet her.

She looked tired, just as she always did, with the same empty smile and hollow eyes. (Y/N) hugged her and in a small voice, said hello.

"Heya, Pumpkin."

There was nothing else to be said as the woman kicked off her shoes and walked into her room, no doubtedly to sleep until she had to drag herself back out to work again. (Y/N) hoped she liked the flowers she had picked out for her.

Sometimes there is no worse feeling than guilt that will eat one out from the inside.

She felt as though the way that things were running in her house functioned like an unbalanced scale. Her mother always came home exhausted and worn-out as the result of working from dawn to dusk, and it hurt the young girl's heart to see her in such poor condition. It wasn't extremely often that she would even get the chance to say hello, and rarer still that she ever had the time to hold a good conversation.

They both loved each other more than life itself, and (Y/N) knew that better than anyone else, but with all the overbearing work her mother put up with, day and night, everything just seemed...

Unfair.

Bitter and unsavory thoughts aside, one glance at the clock on the microwave reminded her of the looming drowsiness she felt gradually washing over her. It had been a long day, and the next was certain to be even longer.

With this in mind, she experienced little to no hesitation before striding off towards her bathroom to ready herself for what she hoped to a good night's rest. Once she was curled up under the cotton sheets and had her stuffed animal of choice in a loving grip (not caring about how childish she may have seemed), the bluish light of her phone caught her attention as she slowly and reluctantly lifted up one eyelid.

Reaching for the device resting on her night stand, she opened both eyes; given how she hadn't really been exposed to the darkness of her room for a prolonged amount of time, it didn't take long to adjust to the screen's luminescent glow as she focused on the message displayed on her lock screen. A single notification was shown, and (Y/N) couldn't help but allow a small smile to make its way onto her face once she had processed what it read.

haruhi.fuji: Good luck tomorrow, (Y/N). Hope you'll be able to handle a few hours out with those goofballs.

[floral-on-main]

Back To My Roots

Lydia's blonde roots begin to show and of course Beetlejuice, the Ghost With The Most, jumps to conclusions. It's not his fault he actually kind of cares for this little asshole now. (Not ship!)

Also on ao3

Words:1621

Lydia being naturally blonde was a basic and unsurprising fact of life. Her dying her hair was also unsurprising. What better way for a girl in emotional turmoil to show just how shitty she was feeling than pitch black hair? Not to mention it fit her goth aesthetic much more than platinum blonde hair. This train of though was spurned on by her reflection starring back at her from the vanity mirror.

The golden roots seemed to mock Lydia with how they stood out against the black. With everything that had been happening she had no chance to touch up her roots. There wasn't a single box of dye in the house, not after Dad and Delia decided to go gray together. Yuck. With a little pleading, she might be able to get Delia to grab her a box of black dye.

With a heavy sigh Lydia flopped onto her bed and draped her left arm over her eyes. Even if no one was there she was going to stay true to her dramatic self.

Beetlejuice floated down the halls of the Deetz-Maitland household, semi-moist canvas clutched tightly to his chest. Delia had been trying to get him to 'paint his feelings'. Yuck. He mostly just used it as time to be a nuisance of hang out with the Maitlands, those nerds knew a lot about painting. It was hobby 69-something for Adam and 420-or-whatever for Barbra. For once he had actually sat down and painted a sandworm, which looked a lot more like a stripped sock than a sandworm.

Without knocking he phased through to door to Lydia's bedroom. He held back a snort as he saw Lydia being her normal dramatic self. They were best friends for a reason. A reason that didn't have to do with demon summoning and abandonment issues.

“How's it going, gremlin? Did Debra sit you down for a 'girls' talk' again?” He proudly held his painting out in front of him, ready for when Lydia turned to look. She was going to be blown away and super impressed.

With a groan Lydia sat up and let her arm fall lip at her side. “Nah, just teenage stuff and angst. You know how it is.” Her eyes locked onto the smudged painting of what looked like a pinstripe eel cracking open an egg with its mouth. Looks like Beej was getting in abstract art like Delia wanted. “What's that?”

Just as he was about to launch into his totally impromptu speech he noticed something pale in Lydia's sea of dark hair. He floated closer to get a better look. Beetlejuice was getting better about personal space, but it still wasn't one of his strong suits.

It was when he was hovering directly over her that he noticed a golden split in the hair right in the middle of her head. He may not understand breathers completely, but this couldn't have been normal. But it was nothing to worry about. It was probably normal and she was fine.

Who was he kidding? Something must of happened during her trip to the Netherworld and now her head was gonna spilt in half! Breather's hair didn't just change colors like that. Did she catch some supernatural malady?  If she died of broken head or half mind or whatever he would be there for her. Now, how was he going to break the news to her? Just the though of loosing his best buddy for eternity had blue bleed into his hair from the roots to the tips.

“Earth to Beetlejuice. You still in there, dummy?” Lydia waved her hand in front of his face. It wasn't uncommon for him to disappear into his own mental world, but this was concerning her. Somewhere in his train of thought the painting slipped from his fingers and fell to the shaggy carpet below. She had learned loosely what each color of Beej's hair meant and knew blue was bad news— or more accurately, sad news. As a last resort she tapped his shoulder. Physical contact usually brought him back to the world of the living.

“I'm so sorry, Lyds! I promise I'll be the best Guide ever when you bite it. And when we get to the Netherworld I'll rip apart whoever or whatever did this to you!” As he rambled his hair turned fully blue and tears threatened to fall.

“What the fu-” Her sentence was cut off by the near crushing hug the demon was giving her. Several tears made tracks through the light layer of dirt on his face. She thumped his side roughly with a closed fist. Once he loosed up a bit she took in a large, theatrical breath.

“What the hell are you talking about? I'm just dying at the normal rate.”

Beetlejuice pulled away briefly to blow his nose on his tie. He leaned back in to tighten the hug, but Lydia screamed bloody murder and managed to push him off. “If you even think about touching me with that petri dish of a tie I'll stab you again.”

“You can stab me as much as you want if it'll make you feel better.” He seemed completely unphased by her protests and just floated at the edge of her bed. Something clearly had Beej pretty worked up, and Lydia was going to get to the bottom of it. At some point the painting had been kicked under the bed, where it then lay forgotten and uncared for— never to be heard of or referenced again.

“Just take a deep breath and tell me what's wrong. Why do you think I'm gonna die now?”

He did as he was told and did his best to appear composed. This composure did nothing for the deep blue staining his hair.  “ I don't know how you haven't noticed, but there's a giant fucking split in your head. Isn't that painful? You were cursing up a storm after you stubbed your toe, but your fine with this? Wait, you need to cough. We need to see if your lungs have started to corrode yet.” Beetlejuice's voice raised a couple octaves as worry once again gripped his unbeating heart.

“Split in my head?” Lydia said the words slowly, as if they were some foreign demonic language. Then the answer hit her like a tombstone to the head. “Beej, look at me and listen carefully.”

With watery eyes he watched her as if this was the last time he would see her alive.

Lydia cleared her throat. “Listen, I'm dying, but at the rate most breathers do. Probably.” That dark thought was quickly pushed from her mind. “My hair isn't naturally black, it's blonde. I dye my hair this color and now the color is fading. It's totally normal and doesn't hurt. Just ask Dad if you don't believe me.”

A painfully silent moment passed between the two. In that moment, the blue faded to be replaced by the normal healthy green hue. The first to break the silence was the flustered demon.

“Pssh, I knew that. Did you really think I would get that worked up over you? It was just a prank and you fell for it hook, line, and sinker!” Beetlejuice was a master at lying, but even that sounded hollow to his ears. He nonchalantly waved his hand as if to dispel any doubts.

Lydia rolled her eyes and smirked. In her most sarcastic voice she said, “You got me, BJ. For a minute I totally believed your heart had grown to sizes and you cared for me.”

“Shut up, you gremlin. Are you doing to 'dye your hair' again?” The air quotes were unnecessary, but totally Beej.

“Of course. If I show up blonde Claire would tear into me without remorse. Probably claim I was trying to steal her styles. She needs to wake up and realize that not everything is about her.” Beetlejuice nodded sympathetically as if he knew the intricacies of teenage girl drama.

“Yeah, you really gotta dye it. I can't have you stealing my style. Color changing hair is practically my trademark. And let me tell you, Netherworld lawyers are ruthless.”

“Get me some dye and then we'll talk about me 'stealing your style', Beej.”

Beetlejuice was already mentally planning how to steal enough dye to keep Lydia sated, but not enough to get caught by either Charles or the Maitlands. He already had to sleep on the couch once this week and he wasn't looking for a repeat. If he was sneaky enough he might be able to even get some for himself. Would it even stick? Eh, he would just find out later.

“Now that we got that crisis out of the way, want to go collect spiders out back? Pretty sure I saw a brown recluse the other day.”

“There is nothing more I would rather do except the Maitlands.”

Lydia grimaced before responding. “I know.”

Lydia grabbed an old mason jar from her dresser and her polaroid from where it was hanging on the vanity. She was all ready to go. She looked over to Beej, who spat in his hands and used it to ineffectively slick back his hair. He caught her looking and gave a thumbs up. “Ready to go when you are.”

The two buddies then raced down the stairs— to Delia's surprise— to get to the backyard. They heard the sound of something heavy falling to the ground, but managed to miss Delia yelling at them to slow down. Turns out there wasn't a brown recluse in the garden, but Beetlejuice managed to conjure up a terrifying replacement. Once Charles got home they were both going to be on web clean up duty though.

[xviicprc]

10 Favorite Characters

Tagged by @pinkafropuffs​ (girl this are so fun to do, thank you!) about my 10 favorite characters so here we go-!

(y’all are ready to see how basic i am?)

1- N (Pokemon)

When will he return from the war-

Ferriswheel shipping flashbacks because honestly? When will Pokemon give us a character as good as N again

2- Edward Elric (Fullmetal Alchemist)

Ah, Fullmetal is basically responsible for me being a weeb lol

While everyone else can do an analysis of his complexity, I simply will say Edward is the sort of character I love as protagonists of anime-

Love how he isn’t either too serious or too goofy. Hmm it’s hard to me to say what I like specifically about him lol. 

Maybe it’s just nostalgia

3- Edmond Dantes (Fate Grand Order)

Ah yes, the current husband of mine- discount Komaeda. 

By seeing my art you should realize how much i love him lol

4- Nanami Kiryuu (Revolutionary Girl Utena)

YOu see, normally I DESPISE characters like Nanami, even after they develop as characters since most of the time they end up being “mean because inferiority complex” HOWEVER Nanami doesn’t have that, she is great and she know’s it!

(Also most of the time, these types of characters aren’t really used comically- and I don’t mean in the sense of “Haha the bully girl got what she deserved!” but instead of this character getting themselves in comical situations)

But it’s the way she matures across the show what made her my favorite among the cast. I love the cast and the show as a whole- but if I had to pick one character among them, it’s Nanami.

5- Akihiko Sanada (Persona 3)

I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS-

But jokes aside Akihiko is my favorite character in Persona 3 (well....close tie with Shinjiro BUT).

He is just (lies on the floor) THE character I always romance because his route is just so cute and makes me feel warm and fuzzy having FEELINGS-

And I remember distincly rejecting his advances on accident and then realizing what I did and going “D:!!!!”

THis man right here was my REAL introduction to HAVING FEELINGS for anime men and I’ll never forgive HI-

6- Xion (Kingdom Hearts)

Shoutout to the firsts characters who I made deeper that the author intended.

If you ever have to fight agains me set it to Vector to the Heavens- if you have to avenge me set it to Another Side while you fight. 

Do you fucking know how I was at 12 years old?? No friends, no homework playing KH 358/2 days??? How much I got attached to Roxas and Xion as a lonely girl who was just discovering things about friendship?

so I’ll ramble on about my interpretations on them because i’ll make it as deep as i want-

The way in which they form a friendship related on both knowing about the keyblade and having no memories from their previous life and the way in which it all comes tumbling down thanks to things outside of their control and how much they try to stop it- 

The way Xion is willing to sacrifice herself for a greater good fully knowing that what the Organization is doing is bad and would endanger the worlds at large and how she, on her own accord, chooses to return her memories to sora even if it means dissapearing from the memories from everyone and truly dying in every sense of the world- all while having to run away from the organization because she would drain all the life from roxas because that was how she was created as a puppet-!

And the final clash! the way in which xion uses all of her power left to fight against the control of the organization because she wants roxas to slay her because she would rather die and lend her power to roxas instead of killing him and being used by the organization!

The way that final fight got integrated into the story! how she warns roxas when she will attack, or how she screams at him “STOP HOLDING BACK!” as her last efforts as an individual hanging to the remnants of their bond-!

As an extra note I’m so glad they didnt “end up together”- it was a good showcase of two teens who had a solid friendship that didn’t need to be turned into a romance because they already love eachother as friends!!!

So as you can see i have a lot of feelings for Xion-

7- Kishinami Hakuno (Fate/Extra)

SHOUTOUT to my favorite protagonist in the Fate Franchise she is so good and I just,,,,,,,,,love her?????

(if you pick Male Hakuno you are absolutely invalid)

So I completly love how she ends up inderectly being a subversion of the “amnesiac character self insert” because she NEEDS to start in a black slate for her to grow.

Love how sassy she can be in the dialouge options and SHE ALLOWED SABER ARCHER AND CASTER TO GROW AS PEOPLE and-

Play Fate/Extra

8-Kcalb (The Gray Garden)

He is so good :c when will he return from the hiatus.

Honestly he is the best character in the game and I love his interactions with Etihw and honestly he defined what 14 year old me loves in character design. AESTHETICS

9-Sonic (Sonic the Hedgehog)

Of Course I had to add the one who started this mess.

Sonic the Hedgehog deserves a better writting team than the one he has! SONIC’S CHARACTER PEAKED IN THE FICKUGGN SIDE GAME SONIC AND THE BLACK KNIGHT BUT EVERYONE IS LIKE “HAHA WHAT A BAD RETELLING OF ARTHURIANA”-

So anyways- Sonic the Hedgehog in the GOOD games with story is someone who never gives up no matter how hard or grim everything may seem, and how he shows kindness to those who needs it, who does what HE feels is the right thing, no matter what everyone else may say and maybe I’m reading too deep but this lil fucker whas the first videogame I ever *emulated* owned and had been a part of my childhood since I learned what the Internet was- I pirated the entire anime and took a REAL liking to drawing thanks to him.

Everyone out there in early 2010 tracing anime while I traced Sonic X screenshots lol

10-Steven Quartz Universe (Steven Universe)

I have a lot of feelings for Steven Universe as a show- and especially his protagonist.

When the show started everyone complained how annoying Steven was- but I never found him annoying? I really like how he has “traditionally femenine” traits and powers (healing, shielding, crying a lot) and isn’t shamed for it? The show has MANY problems but it I LOVE it.

And, since the start of the series I liked Steven, I love how he develops in the show, and honestly so many moments I saw myself in him- and then came Steven Universe Future which he explores his trauma after the events of the series- just everything about him just hit’s home- even more than I expected (the cactus Steven-)

How Steven goes from viewing the Gems as these all knowing powerful mother figures- and how he feels as if he has to live up to their expectations, and the impossible barrier set up by his mother at the start of the series-

(How later he view’s himself as a fraud- and how he doesn’t “pay the consequenses” and he is just “as bad as his mother”- the internalized self hatred, his drifting friends and represed trauma- I’m glad the show does this- I don’t think I would have self reflected as much as I did without this show)

Steven Universe is a show I hold close to my heart, so do I with it’s protagonist.

 Haha I don’t feel like tagging people after that lol

[scream-tears]

The Royal Invitation - Part 8

Aerowyn Matilde George Rothchester might seem like a very long name, but it definitely is not for a royal in the Kingdom of Dalewin.

After her grandfather, the beloved king, passed away, Aerowyn (also known as Winny) is called back from her art school in New York. She’s thrown back into her royal duties, expected to know what to do.

But with the Royal advisor on tour with the new king, Winny is left to figure things out with his stepson. The only problem, he has no idea what he’s doing, after all he’s only the lead singer in a band.

Co-written story with @aweirdkindofyellow

Chapter 8

Alex’s POV:

I opened an eye slightly, peeking at the time illuminating on my phone screen. 5.46. I grabbed my phone from the bedside cabinet, swiping left before pushing it to my ear.

"Dude, I've called you five times!" Jack's loud and slightly pissed voice sounded through the phone. I sighed wearily, rolling onto my back as my head sunk into the pillows.

"Did you forget about the nine hour time difference?" I groaned, frowning at my disrupted sleep.

"That seems like more of a you problem, than a me problem," he retorted. "Now. Did you sort out plans for the tour?"

"I'll sort it soon."

I listened to his mumble of profanities on the other end, picking up on his comment of 'you said that last time'. I could almost picture him roll his eyes in annoyance.

"I said I'll sort it." I added bitterly.

"Fine. But we leave in a week, Alex. You're going to have to come up with something good and fast."

He ended the call before I could say anything back, clearly still annoyed by my lack of effort in the tour department. Sure touring with Blink-182 had been my dream since I was a teen, but it was terrible timing. I didn't want to betray the guys by turning down the offer, but I also didn't want to let Garry down by leaving him in his time of need. No matter what I did it was a win-loss situation.

I sat up in bed, glancing over at the faint pink glow emanating from the window. An early morning walk couldn't hurt.

After changing into jeans and a shirt, I slipped into my sneakers, throwing one of All Time Low's newest hoodies on before leaving the room. The corridors were deserted, as expected, with the exception of a few yawning guards about to end their night shift.

I slipped out the back entrance with the intention to head onto the field, though my attention was drawn elsewhere before I could make it too far past the patio doors.

"Alex, hey," a voice called out over the garden, soft yet weary. I looked around, eventually spotting the grinning blonde, waving at me from the top window. Aerowyn.

"Why are you up this early?" I asked, smiling back at her beaming grin.

"I could ask you the same thing!" She countered, glancing back into the room momentarily before turning back to me. "I was painting."

I chuckled softly, "of course you were."

"Wait there," she added, disappearing into the shadows of the library. I nodded, though knowing she couldn't see, before turning to watch the sun as it began to rise over the trees in the distance.

"Come on," her warm voice whispered beside me as she took my hand in her own, pulling me along with her through the garden. We passed through the hedges at the end of the patio, making our way out onto the field.

I didn't take me long to stop paying attention to where we were actually going, because I instead turned my gaze to her hand wrapped around my own. She bounced as she walked causing our hands to swing in time, rocking back and forth with each step we made.

I looked up in surprise as she came to a halt, dropping down on the freshly cut grass. I slumped down beside her, taking a look at our surroundings. 

We were sat on a small hill just before the trees, the sunrise over the lake perfectly in view. The colours of orange and pink all merged into one as they reflected against the glistening blue water. It was one hell of a sight.

"Beautiful, isn't it." Aerowyn mumbled beside me, turning my attention back to her. Her lips were curled into a warm smile; her eyes fixated on the view.

"Yes it is." I whispered in reply.

We sat there for a while, just taking in the surroundings. With nothing but the chirps of the birds and the slow swaying of the trees in the wind, silence soon submerged us and we were left to appreciate the few moments away from chaos we had.

"Alex?" Aerowyn asked, sparing a single glance in my direction before turning back to the pond.

"Winny." I replied with a nod.

She giggled at the name. "You know the only other person who called me that was my Grandfather," she added with a small smile.

"I'm sorry, I didn't-"

"No, it's fine," she interrupted. "I like it."

She turned to face me again and we held eye contact for a moment as silence engulfed us.

"We should probably go and get ready for breakfast," she stated, standing up from the grass verge and brushing herself down. I glanced down at my empty hand, realising she had been holding it the entire time. "You coming?"

"Yeah," I spoke, standing up. With one last glance at the now fully risen sun, I began following Aerowyn back towards the castle.

Breakfast was exactly like it had been for the last week of my stay, only there was a change in the seating arrangements. Instead of me and Garry sitting together on the far side of the table, Garry and Aerowyn had switched places leaving me with the princess by my side. Not that I complaining. We basically had our own conversation, occasionally joining in with the group notices about the royal portrait. You see, since there was a new king ruling now, the family would have to take another family portrait, like the one I saw on my way to the library. It was some family tradition from the seventeenth century that they felt the need to keep alive.

"So, are we all set on the portrait arrangements?" The king spoke, drawing both Winny and I back into the conversation.

"Indeed. Everyone is still set on showing up, and the maids are on hand with the outfits to get everyone ready." Garry explained, glancing over his schedule before turning back to the king.

"And you all are feeling okay?" He asked, turning to his family. The three nodded, smiling back at the king. "Very well then. We will meet back here in two hours to greet our guests." 

The group was soon dispersed and I found myself with a new schedule for the day. Garry had set me in charge of Augustus and Aerowyn, which is how I found myself standing outside of Aerowyn's room, just like a day a few days prior. Augustus was across from me, already dressed in his finest attire.

"So my sister seems to like you," he spoke, his eyes creeping over my outfit choice before returning to my face. It was pretty obvious he was judging me, but I already knew I was irregular in a royal castle. I mean, I’m a singer in a pop-punk band.

"Yeah, I guess she does," I smiled, holding back the temptation to smirk.

He opened his mouth to say something else, only to be cut off by Aerowyn sauntering out into the corridor. She spun around, flaunting her outfit to the both of us. 

Her dress was floor length–a faded blue with crystals embroidered along the neckline. With her hair curled and pulled back into a clip, she wore a tiara embellished in the royal jewels. Not to mention her smile was as genial as ever.

"Well don't you look dashing, Gus-Gus", she spoke, throwing an arm over Augustus' shoulder before pulling him into a one-armed hug. He rolled his eyes, shuffling beneath her grip.

"You're going to ruin my outfit, Aerowyn," he accused, to which she let go, holding both hands to her mouth, feigning shock. I chuckled lightly at the two of them, turning away to check the schedule for the rest of the day.

Within an hour Augustus and Aerowyn were with their parents, greeting their family as they arrived, whilst I helped Garry co-ordinate the last of the photoshoot arrangements. Before long, the royal family were being ushered into the room, all dressed in their royal colours. 

I shuffled back against the wall, staying out of the way whilst Garry helped the photographer sort the family into their places. I watched Aerowyn as she found her place, lifting one of her youngest cousins into arms. She tickled the little girl causing her to giggle aloud. I smiled, admiring the exchange between Winny and the girl. It was no wonder she was loved so much around here.

She glanced over at me, a beaming grin enhancing her soft-pink lips. With one nod, she turned away to face the photographer. In that second, my heart fluttered.

[teababe27]

Notes From the 2019 Myanimelist.net Challenges - Part 1: Anime

Health problems have laid me up a little, but now I’m finally posting this.

As you can tell by the title, this is a post in the vein of last year’s notes about the Myanimelist.net Anime Watching and Manga Reading Challenges. While I didn’t complete everything by the deadline, I had some fun with it and saw/read some good things, some okay things, some things I’ve been meaning to watch anyway, and some things I probably wouldn’t have if it wasn’t for this challenge.

This post will deal with the anime side. Part 2, dealing with the manga side, will come soon.

I will mention some notables/honorable mentions and then some of my favorite things I watched for this challenge.

Let’s do this.

Honorable Mentions/Other Notables: Millennium Actress - completed for the task “Watch an award-winning anime”

Two filmmakers interview Chiyoko, a retired, reclusive actress from long ago. She brings the two filmmakers through her memories.

As far as I’m concerned, anything Satoshi Kon does is great. A movie with an interesting concept and an interesting art style. I teared up a little at the end, ngl.

RIP Satoshi Kon.

My Neighbor Totoro - completed for the task “Watch an original anime”

Two little girls move to a house in the countryside with their father. While at the house, they discover forest spirits and go on adventures with them.

As expected from Studio Ghibli, the art is gorgeous. The story was fun. I’m ashamed to admit I haven’t seen this until now.

While not my favorite Miyazaki movie, this was still beautiful and also fucking adorable.

It was also pretty cool to hear the Fanning sisters in early roles.

Problem Children Are Coming From Another World, Aren’t They? - completed for the task “Watch an anime in which your favorite character’s voice actor participated”

Three kids, each with a different special ability, are whisked away to a world called Little Garden. They are called upon by Kurousagi (Black Rabbit in the English dub) to win “Gift Games” and help the community regain its former glory and resources after a demon took them away.

I’d put this under the group of “Things i probably wouldn’t have watched if not for this challenge”.

I’m not normally into isekai anime (I feel it’s been way overdone lately), but I had fun with this. I honestly didn’t like a couple of the characters at first, but then I realized it was kinda the point. They did get better, though.

Automatic props for having Josh Grelle in there voicing one of the titular problem children.

I had fun with this one overall.

Aoi Bungaku Series - completed for the task “Watch an anime with more than 16 minutes in total and tagged as Mystery, Psychological, and/or Thriller”

An anthology adapting several classic Japanese books and stories.

This anime was different than a lot of what I have watched before. Bleak as hell a lot of the time (especially in the first story), but I found this anime interesting. I might try and read the books that these stories were based on.

The Irresponsible Captain Tylor - completed for the task “Watch an anime suggested by Myanimelist or Anime+”

Justy Ueki Tylor is a bit of a lazy bum. He signs up to join the space military because he wants to live a relatively easy life and get a good pension when he retires. Through sheer charisma and dumb luck, he helps diffuse a hostage situation, leading him to be promoted to Captain of a ship with a bad reputation. An evil space empire and higher-ups looking to get rid of Tylor are also involved.

I found this show funny, but I also feel like this is one you need to be in the mood for. That being said, this was a fun watch.

A lot of zany hijinks and watching Tylor get by through sheer luck and charisma. Gave me some mixed feelings at times.

I have a weakness for things that came out in the 90s, as I grew up with that animation style and shows from that time period. As such, it was very cool to hear voice actors from my childhood, like Rachel Lillis and Lisa Ortiz, in this anime. (I was internally going “OMG it’s Misty!!” every time Yuriko talked.)

Favorites from the Challenge:

Hanayamata - completed for the task “Watch an anime that began airing between 2010 and 2015″

An ordinary student, Naru, wants nothing more than to be pretty and dazzling like in her fairy tale books. One day, she meets a mysterious girl, Hana, who dances with her one night. Hana turns out to be an American transfer student who ends up transferring into Naru’s class. Hana then introduces Naru to Yosakoi dancing and forms the Yosakoi club.

I thought this was a cute and fun slice-of-life anime. Premise can be a bit iffy if you really think about it, but I had fun with this show. I love how everyone slowly opened up with each other and was able to make their club work.

Also, I couldn’t help but have this thought: I feel like the first couple episodes had so much lesbian subtext that I had to check if this anime was made by KyoAni (it wasn’t, it’s made by Madhouse).

Tatami Galaxy - completed for the task “Watch a Noitamina anime”

A third-year college student runs into a mysterious guy at a ramen shop. The student reflects on his past 2 years at college, mostly spent with his friend Ozu trying to break up happy couples. The student wonders if he’s wasted his life and resolves to do better. Then a time loop starts happening and more chances arrive.

*clasps hands like Gendo Ikari*

We meet again, Masaki Yuasa.

No better time than this challenge to work through more of Masaki Yuasa’s filmography, especially after watching the decent Mind Game and the excellent Kaiba for last year’s challenge.

While watching this anime, I felt myself going back and forth on whether or not I really liked this anime. Whether it was overrated or underrated. Whether it was a good idea on what the Endless 8 could have been or something that kept going unnecessarily long because the Student couldn’t see what was in front of his face. Whether it was style over substance.

The answer?

Yes.

I honestly liked it, but I do understand the criticism. I feel like the confusion about my feelings can be a good thing and this anime still had some great points and made me think.

I also thought the art style and soundtrack were great, as usual from Masaki Yuasa.

One Outs - completed for the task “Watch an active staff member’s favorite anime with 10 episodes or more”

A struggling baseball team recruits Tokuchi Towa, a pitcher who is more of a gambler than anything. Kojima, the team’s veteran player, hopes that Tokuchi will lead them to the championship. Corrupt ownership and unethical opponents also add problems.

Tokuchi was a great character. He’s a genius, but also a huge troll. His method is basically trying to psychologically get to the other players and go from there. I liked seeing him work through situations and outsmart people. This was one of the few anime from the challenge where I could watch several episodes in one sitting and not even realize it.

Basically, this was a take on sports anime I didn’t know I needed.

Aggressive Retsuko (aka Aggretsuko) - Season 1 completed for the task “Watch an ONA,” Season 2 completed for the task “Watch an anime with more than 16 minutes in total and a popularity lower than #700″

Retsuko, a red panda, is an average office worker. Unfortunately, she hates her job. She is harassed by her boss and given unreasonable amounts of work. To relieve the stress from her life, she secretly goes to karaoke and sings death metal to scream everything out.

I love this. I love Retsuko. I love the little songs sprinkled in. I love Retsuko’s relationships with several of her office-mates.

I feel like I can relate so hard. Not necessarily with the heavy work load, but just the general stresses of life in your 20s. Being stuck in a job that isn’t the best, and also liking metal.

I had a ton of fun with this show. Season 1 was slightly better than Season 2, but I loved this show all the same.

Girls’ Last Tour - completed for the task “Watch an anime that finished airing with more than 10 episodes and has a synopsis by MAL Rewrite”

In a post-apocalyptic, war-torn landscape, two girls, Chito and Yuri, travel the world for answers, with only their motorbike/tank, their supplies, and each other.

This, by far, wins Best of the Challenge this year.

This anime gave me a mix of emotions that I don’t know if I’ve ever felt before. A strange mix of existential dread and sadness and going “aww” at the slice-of-life adventures the two girls have. It made me laugh, made me cry, and made me think.

Watch this one, please.

[anythingfanfiction]

Ben Solo, the One and Only

Here's Chapter 1 if you didn't read it.

Chapter 2

Although it was only a few hours away, Ben Solo was anxiously waiting for time to pass. Deciding to lose the rough and rugged look, he instead opted for a classier, yet still casual, appearance. A longsleeved, white buttoned-down tunic with a jet-black leather jacket overtop paired with similarly dark pants and shoes. He had even made an attempt to somewhat fix his mop of black hair but only resulted in a messier version of what he started with.

Despite this, Ben saw his handsome reflection and took his leave, not wanting to delay himself any further from his beautiful date. He nonchalantly made his way over to the Millenium Falcon but was stopped abruptly by his mother. She gazed suspiciously at him and questioned, “Where are you off to wearing that?” 

Is it really that strange to dress nicer?

“Thanks, Ma. I think I look pretty good too. I won’t be going anywhere too far or dangerous if that’s your concern,” Ben responded curtly and wondered himself as to why he hid his plans. Leia was disapprovingly aware of her son’s reputation - sneaking off to visit bars and pick up women. Ben thought about what difference would it make if she knew where he was headed but decided on keeping quiet. She understood that Ben was no longer a child; he was capable of making his own choices and mistakes, even if she wished he’d grow out of this sooner than later. Upon seeing his mother’s unsatisfied demeanor, Ben leaned down to kiss her on the cheek and quietly said, “Love you, Ma.”

As Ben finally reached the Falcon, he was interrupted once more, “Nice jacket, planning on sharing it with a pretty girl?”

Cocky, noble, and definitely way in over his head, stood Poe Dameron - Ben’s best friend and biggest headache. The latter chuckled and turned to answer his friend, “Perhaps.��

Without any other setbacks, Ben boarded his ship and set a course to meet with his date. Once he arrived on her planet, he landed his ship in the same forest as always within walking distance to the garden. On the way to her, Ben picked up some flowers and drinks from a street vendor as his contribution to the picnic. He saw her with a basket, setting a blanket in the usual spot near some flowering shrubs. She looked up to catch him staring and she smiled, waving for him to come sit with her on the ground. So he did.

“Ben.”

“Vivian.”

They almost awkwardly greeted one another and Ben took the moment to appreciate the sound of his name from her lips. He also took note of her simple, yet highly flattering, coffee colored frock; especially how it seemed to accentuate her protruding collarbones and endowed figure. Once he handed her the flowers, she gratefully accepted them and proceeded to take out an array of different fruits, sandwiches, and pastries from her basket.

“So tell me the basics and I will return the favor. Where are you from? What do you do for a living? Any siblings or pets? Is there something, in particular, that you think I should know about you?” Her words surprised him; never had he been addressed in such a blunt and bold way by a date. Usually, conversations would be bouncing between compliments, light-hearted topics, and flirtatiously knowing eyes. Hardly anyone was trying to get to know a person these days; it was all about the date’s end result. It was very unnatural for him, but he liked it nonetheless. 

“Well, I was born in the capital of Chandrila, Hanna City, but now -” he cut himself off out of hesitation, “but now I live on a military base not too far from here. For a while, it was just my parents and me, alongside my dad’s best friend and occasionally, my mother’s brother. So no siblings, though I guess you can count the best friend as a pet considering that he’s a Wookie, but I don’t think he’ll like that.”

She smiled and laughed at that. Ben watched her and feared to tell the whole truth - afraid that it might push her away. He settled for the vaguer, yet still true, alternative and continued, “My uncle is a teacher of sorts, noticed I had a talent for his martial arts and invited me to partake in his classes. I accepted and trained with him for years but eventually quit a little after I grew out of adolescence.”

“Now, I’m a pilot, like my dad, and work for my mom whose a general. In my free time, I like to take side jobs or travel. Most recently though, I enjoy staring at a pretty girl who spends her afternoons in a garden.” His last comment had her face reveal a light blush that could hardly be seen because it hid behind her tan skin.

“What’s it like, being a pilot? Can you read stars? Do you have your own ship?” Her excitement to know more of him exceedingly pleased Ben, but he had enough of talking about himself and wanted to get to her own story.

“Whoa there, I thought we were going through the basics first, remember? As far as I’m concerned, it’s your turn now and I’m all ears. You can ask me again later.”

“Fine,” she muttered unhappily but continued anyway, “I was born here on Viktas seven years before my brother. When I was about 14, my parents had passed away because of an ongoing war with our neighboring planet, Qrona. Though we lost our parents and our home, my brother and I were not lost for long. A team of military medical workers had found us and decided to care for us in secret.

“It took less than a week for their commanding officer to discover what had been going on, but even then, they had decided to keep us. Our only rule was that we couldn’t leave the medical ward alone, especially if there was combat was taking place. Much of my time was spent with the recovering soldiers, my brother, and the medical attendants. As I grew older, I completed the fundamental healer’s training and learned how to treat injuries, handle the equipment, perform minor surgeries and to care for those wounded.  

“About 7 years after we were found, the war had officially ended and it took over half a year to treat those who remained injured from combat. Once that was done, I was offered several positions for study and work. I graduated with my medical degree and have been working at the local hospital less than 2 miles from my apartment here for the past 3 years.”

“That’s me. Now if you don’t mind, I’d really appreciate it if you could answer my questions from earlier.” She finished and all Ben could do was stare at her, astonished by she said all this without faltering. He was truly impressed by her nature.

He looked her in the eyes and smiled, “Sure thing.”

The two had been in the garden much longer than planned. The sun had set shortly after they had shared their stories and they were now staring at Viktas’ two moons. Together, they laid on the striped blanket as Ben pointed out constellations and tried to teach Vivian how to read stars. He loved to see her smile, she almost always did and he liked to think that it was because of him. It made him think that perhaps she used her smile as a way to hide. 

With starry night sky, flowering plants around them, and her beautiful smile, Ben thought there’d be no moment more perfect than now to make his move. He slowly leaned in closer to her with the intention of kissing her soft lips but was prevented by a hand grasping his chin and cheeks, inches away from her face. Vivian violently glared at him and kept his face in her hand’s grip, “Nice try, but not yet. It’s obvious that you do this more often than you probably should - playing around with women,” she scoffed.

“I am easy to please but by no means easy to get. I’ve no intentions of maintaining a short willed relationship or being with someone that wants me for the ulterior motive. Prove to me that you can dedicate yourself and earn my trust, then you can win my affection.”

Ben was left speechless and had turned red; he could tell that she was testing him. He had never seen any other significant expressions on her face beside her charming smile. But this, this determined display of control had Ben slightly aroused, wishing to see every single possible way her expressions could be. 

Vivian let go of his face and spoke again, “Next month, there will be a festival in the city celebrating another year of peace. You can be my escort if you wish.”

To this, Ben quickly nodded in agreement before she stood up and continued, “Until then, you know where I’ll be and you’re always welcome to join me.”

With that as her final note, Vivian bent down to ruffle Ben’s hair and pick up her basket. Before he knew it, she had already been inside her apartment building and he thought to himself, Whoa.

A/N: Viktas and Qrona are, of course, made-up planets for the sake of story. As for Vivian, you can imagine her to be however you please; whether she looks like yourself or how I described her, just know that she is a beautiful woman close to Ben’s age. I see her with naturally tanned skin (like that of some Hispanics) and dark, brown curled hair. She has delicate facial features and is always well-groomed, plus wears light makeup (i.e. mascara, tinted moisturizer) to enhance her appearance. And to add to Ben’s happiness, her body is also very well-endowed.

[magaprima]

Part 1 Episode 3 thoughts

The scene in the bathroom, where she appears suddenly behind an upset Sabrina, the paper towel she holds out is so scrunched and she holds it out so awkwardly, that it tells us how fake this all is, even if it’s not currently visible to Sabrina. Combined with the purposefully licking her thumb to wipe away a mark from Sabrina’s face which is a very typical thing of the archetypal Mother, shows that she’s generally and actively trying to be maternal, that’s the angle she’s using. She knows Sabrina is without an official, biological Mother in her life, and Lilith is perhaps hoping that being maternal is the way in. And this does, in time, work (but as a lot of people have said both in headcanon posts as well as joke ones, Lilith narrative as regards Sabrina is essentially ‘I will fake caring for her’ and then her constantly fighting genuinely caring before finally being like ‘fuck it, my plan has backfired on me terribly’)

After Sabrina leaves, as she turns to the mirror and checks her lipstick, Lilith looks a mixture of smug and fucking tired of this shit. There’s the smugness that she has ensured Sabrina knows she’s there to help, she’s there caring about her, a maternal hand reaching out, but she also seems so fucking done with the shit she has to do. This could also be her thoughts on Sabrina’s reaction to the visit from Satan in Hawthorne’s office, like ‘well fucking done, Lucifer. You’ve just sent her running a mile. She’s not going to sign any book when you’re freaking her out at school’. Lilith may be abused and conditioned to follow the Dark Lord without question, to do as he asks her, do his bidding, but that doesn’t mean she can’t still think he’s an idiot man-angel whose terrible tactics she’s going to have to fix. 

When in Blackwood’s office, the phrase ‘The girl is my charge’ is an interesting one. The term ‘charge’ as well as the possessive ‘my’ implies that Satan has not just told her to get Sabrina to sign the book, but also to watch over her, keep her safe. Lilith, at this point, is presuming that reason is because Sabrina needs to be alive to sign the Book (and as I said above, she’s conditioned not to question him), but we, now with retrospect and hindsight, know the real reason he wanted Lilith looking after Sabrina; both because he intended the girl to be his Queen and because he intended Lilith to be her ‘satanic fairy godmother’. 

When she flicks Blackwood’s pages without looking at them, this has such a vibe of being the taunting child here, as she is deliberately messing with his stuff and deliberately losing him his page. It just really reveals their dynamic and what she thinks of him, how dismissive she is and how much she wants to irritate him at best and get rid of him entirely at worst. He is literally so beneath in her view that she doesn’t even have to pay full attention. 

“As is my way. A hand on her shoulder, a whisper in her ear” tells us not only that Lilith is the queen of subtle manipulation and corruption, but that this hasn’t been the first assignment of this kind. The fact she doesn’t think his obsession with getting Sabrina to sign the book makes her anything special, implies Satan has had others he’s focused on for one reason or another and that Lilith is often the one sent in to sort it. Also the fact she goes straight for the booze shows us that not only does the woman need a drink, but there’s at least one thing about the mortal realm she actually likes. 

“But she was at the altar; you failed to get the signature”; Lilith is already well aware of who the more capable of the two are. It’s that thing where she doesn’t think there’s a competition because she doesn’t consider Blackwood to even be in her league. 

“My dear demoness” seems to imply that while Blackwood knows what she is, he might not know who she is. Lilith is quite a renowned person within their world (obviously, but it’s also shown by Edward mentioning her in his manifesto and Faustus giving her a co-starring role in his play) so I can’t help but feel a warlock would be a bit more respectful to the Mother of Demons. But I don’t write Blackwood and I’ve never done on meta on him, so I wouldn’t like to say any of that is definite. 

Lilith glares one flash of a sharp glare when he says her methods are weak, because that’s offending her tactics and she’s damn proud of the way she works and knows it gets the job done, so she’s professionally offended here. But when he adds ‘your will is womanly’, she rolls her eyes, because this isn’t professional, this isn’t constructive criticism to be taken seriously, this is the same old male refrain she’s heard a thousand times before. 

"Yes, you’re blunt like a hammer, that’s true” Implies they’ve spoken quite a few times before we see this meeting, though how much I don’t know, but there’s a familiarity here, that perhaps she even went to the Academy the night she arrived (after she killed Wardwell, because...first things first)

Her eyes flicker with thought when she says ‘But don’t underestimate her, warlock’, as she thinks back on her own interchanges with Sabrina. It’s less warning him here and more a case of Lilith thinking aloud. She is consciously realising how clever and determined Sabrina is, how much more complicated this task she’s been set will be, and perhaps there’s even a flicker of admiration there (though it’s quashed by Lilith’s current ambitions, intent and where her then loyalties lay).

The true warning to Blackwood comes when she adds ‘and don’t disrespect me’. She loses her thoughtful gaze here and turns to look at him with something that is sharp and dangerous. There’s no doubt she is deadly serious here. Emphasis on deadly. 

“High priest or not, you’re still a man. And I feast on male flesh” This is an epic implied threat, heck it’s barely implied, she will eat him if he doesn’t get in line, but it’s hysterical how you see his smile fall of his face suddenly like ‘wait, what?’. 

When we go to the school and Lilith is all ‘You’ll never guess, Sabrina’ she totally ignores Harvey until she is forced to acknowledge him. But even then her wording ‘That’s W.I.C.C.A to you, Mr Kinkle’ is distancing language. Whereas she’s shoulder to shoulder with Sabrina, close, implying allies, two women working together on the same side. But when she adds ‘making their voices heard’ she seems to genuinely smile and it’s possible that there’s something that even in mortals she has to admire; women taking charge. 

Lilith takes far too much time and detail and attention in making that scrapbook of newspaper cutting. She even hovers pieces over the book to check it’s the right place and it will be aesthetically pleasing before she sticks them down. Lilith basically went all out on that Blue Peter project (and she does it again with the Gingerbread house in the Solstice episode. Lilith puts her heart and soul into magic art projects)

Also, as a side note, I’m not quite sure how taunting the lawyer with the image of his dead daughter was supposed to change his mind about helping Sabrina. I mean, Lilith, what are you doing? That’s only going to motivate him to fight the devil even more, surely? She definitely did a better job trying to break the team up by giving Sabrina the book of news articles, but in the end, it merely led him to telling her the truth about his devil deal, as well as the tragedy of his daughter’s death, and basically Lilith inadvertently made the team stronger. Or it might be a subconscious level of self-sabotage. Unlikely, but a nice thought. 

“Have you come to congratulate me?” “No. And congratulate you on what?”

The no, is a simple, pfft, of course I haven’t come to congratulate you. But the added ‘and congratulate you on what’ seems to be like ‘wait, what the fuck would I even be congratulating you for?’. And as she says ‘a half victory is no victory at all’ she literally frowns at him like ‘are you an actual idiot? You want congratulations for....you’re confusing me with your idiocy’. She’s also messing with his stuff again as she talks. These two needed more scenes, because it could have been really fun...just with her taunting him really, haha. 

“It’s always brute force with you men, isn’t it?” 

This heavily implies Lilith’s experiences throughout her life. She had brute force from Adam wanting her to submit to him, brute force from the False God who kicked her out of the garden to die when she didn’t follow his rules, brute force from Satan who has made her in his serving handmaiden with his abuse. And of course there will be other instances with other men, mortal and demon, that we haven’t heard about specifically from the show. This is Lilith’s established base line for men, it’s always about brute force. It’s why Adam 2.0 is such a shock for her, because there’s no brute force, no physical violence there. 

“But real corruption is a thin, subtle blade”

Yes, this is Lilith’s tactic, but I think it’s also reflective of what Satan did to her. To change her from human/witch to demoness, woman to handmaiden. I don’t believe either of those things happened over night, and I don’t believe her character, her nature, changed that completely and suddenly either. It was slow and subtle, all with Satan’s easing and encouragement, his abuse, both mental and physical, and then his rewards, taking and giving as he saw fit, his talks with her....all of it a thin subtle blade until Lilith didn’t realise how deep it was and she’s lost to it. 

“I am quite good at tearing souls apart. One piece at a time” Everyone needs a hobby and apparently this is Lilith’s. 

Yet, despite that, what is her plan for tearing souls? It’s a freaking bookclub. That we see do nothing in the series except give them great books to read, forbidden books that allow them to rebel against the establishment, to bond over said rebellion, to explore their true selves...and basically all become a lot more learned and self-actualised and confident because of it. She freaking improves their lives here. Is this subconscious sabotage? Or is Lilith just really bad at trying to corrupt young woman because her own experiences just make her natural instinct to free them? Or is that we’re in such a horror of a male patriarchal nightmare that Lilith is needed?

Theo is, of course, smiling constantly throughout this scene. They look directly at Lilith, smiling, and then they smile and everyone else. They’re constantly right at Lilith’s side. They laugh at her saying ‘Juicy, forbidden novels’. This is either a crush of all crushes, or Lilith is just giving off a vibe that Theo is loving. Or maybe it’s both. Both is good. 

Also the juice forbidden novels line is a totally mirror to the juice forbidden apple which Eve ate. 

“A little something for each of you” She says menacingly, looking at them all with silent, evil plot face. You gave them a book club, Lilith. Of banned books. You’re becoming their dream teacher, not their nightmare. This is not evil. This is brilliant. 

[bfseventeen]

High School Crush Mingyu

we all have/had that one high school crush that melted our hearts day after day

basically, the reason why we were so motived to go to classes

well having kim mingyu in your class did not make you sad at all

sure there were too many girls and boys drooling over him so you felt you have no chance with him whatsoever

but any time you looked at him during class

how focused he was and how hard working

his handsome features showing off even more during concentrations

your stomach became a quidditch field for butterflies

he was a good student

all the teachers loved him

he had plenty of friends but never really a girlfriend

he kept on saying he was busy to keep up his grades and to focus on his future

a guy like him could have gotten anyone who we would have wanted

but instead, he put his studies first

you had no idea that under all the handsome godlike features and hardworking study persona

there was a far more fragile and insecure side hiding in him

you didn’t realize this until one day you found him in an empty classroom

he was taking a nap on top of dozens of papers

you tried to go in the room slowly and took a glance at the papers he was sleeping on

they seemed to be applications for art schools but they were all empty

you didn’t know if you should wake him up or just let him sleep

up this close, you could see the dark circles under his eyes

it was the first time you saw him this vulnerable 

but before you could decide what to do mingyu suddenly opened his eyes

“oh i didn’t want to bother you” you said in a high pitched voice

it was basically the first time you were in a classroom with him without all the other students

“it’s okay” he said while he rubbed his eyes

he put the papers in a neat stack and slid them into his backpack

when he stood up to leave you suddenly grabbed his arm

this made him surprised but he just looked back at you curiously

“is everything okay?” you asked him with a warm voice and he smiled weakly

“not really but thanks for asking”

he replied and he was about to go but then he stopped in the door

he turned back to face you and he seemed to hesitate for a moment

“do you think you could judge me objectively?” he asked and this sudden question made you feel confused

“i think so, yes” you replied

besides having a huge crush on him, you were not really close so maybe you could look at him in an objective way

“i want to ask your opinion about something... can you come with me to the art room?” he asked and you nodded

you followed him out of the classroom and after a couple of minutes you got into the art room

mingyu took off a folder from one of the shelves and opened it on top of the table

inside there were countless of artworks done with different types of pencils

some were still lives but there were portraits and even abstracts works with many different colors

“these are all done by me” he said while laying them out on the table in front of you

“i want to apply to some art schools in the country but i don’t know if my art is good enough or not” he said with a deep sigh and you carefully looked at each of his drawings

“i’m not the best person to look at these because i’m not an art expert” you told him honestly

“i know, i know you are better with other subjects but everyone in the art class even the teacher speaks so highly of me but i don’t know if they are honest or they just tell me good feedback because they adore me”

explained mingyu which made you think deeper but you were also surprised to learn that mingyu knows about you more than you thought

when you looked at his artwork, you tried to put aside your feelings for him

and you tried to get your art critique self out there

it was hard because to you what he made were truly amazing

they seemed to have a sense of purity in them

even in the chaotic abstract artwork there was something innocent

maybe the color and shape combination he used

or maybe because that’s what mingyu really was

“i think all of these look good, i like these especially,” you said while pulling some artwork in front of him that truly amazed you

mingyu looked more carefully at those artworks and he finally smiled

“these are my favorites too, especially because i drew them when i was feeling happy and i drew because i loved it not because i wanted to prove myself” he said while looking down on his artworks

“where do you like to draw?” you asked with curiosity and mingyu shily smiled

“here in the school, more specifically outside by the small park we have” 

he said while pointing towards the direction of it

“can you draw a picture of me?” you asked suddenly which made both him and you surprised

“of course” he said happily and he gathered a couple of art supplies 

then the two of you walked out in the garden

you sat down on a bench under a blooming tree while mingyu sat down in the grass

not caring about if his pants get dirty or not

he seemed excited to have the chance to draw you

he took out a paper and a couple of pencils

at first, he carefully examined your features

he was looking at you for long minutes before he picked up his pencil and started to draw an outline

the spring breeze lifted your hair up a couple of times

while the burning sun shined down on both of you warmly 

it felt so peaceful but those damn butterflies in your stomach kept on dancing every time he looked at you with his big deep eyes

after twenty minutes of silence and hard work, mingyu finally put down his pencil and looked at his drawing from afar

“i don’t think she is as beautiful as you” he said not even realizing the weight of his words and how much they made you blush

he finally turned the paper towards you and your jaw dropped

you look more beautiful than you ever felt

even the features you didn’t like on your face seemed prettier in the overall picture

you wondered if mingyu have done this way because he wanted to make you look prettier or he just simply saw you this beautiful

“does it feel like looking in a mirror?” he asked with a playful smile

“more like looking in a mirror that makes your reflection in the way you wish to look” you said while feeling embarrassed

“ah what are you talking about, the real you is far more beautiful” he said now aware of his words 

“anyway, i think you have done an amazing job and with such talent that you have you would be a fool not to apply to those art schools” you said while you spoke with truth in your words

mingyu folded the paper and put it into his wallet

“from today on you are going to be my motivation” he said with a shy smile

“i’m just trying to get someone talented on the right track” you shrugged

“you are my master” he laughed

“a master who can’t even draw herself”

the two of you laughed and hung around a little more

you chased each other down on the nearby playground and while you sat in the swing mingyu gently pushed you

he talked about his childhood and how he developed his love for art

it all felt so pleasant and innocent

you didn’t even notice you missed a whole period

when the bell rang all the students ran outside and you were disappointed when you realized you had to head home

“tomorrow, let’s eat lunch together” mingyu suggested and you happily agreed

“picasso maybe tomorrow i should draw a portrait of you” you teased him while he laughed like a child

[driftingicecaps-fr]

Lair Review for Kizmetto #59149

Always good to see you @duskthicketbonepicker!! Thanks for the items <3

I really love the artwork you have on the left side of your clan profile and the familiar gifs are adorable. Thank you for having your lore thread linked, I’ll be reading through it as I work on the review. It’s really well made and has really great art and graphics! I loveeeee your lair, you have so many pretty and well dressed dragons! I didn’t realize how many resorts existed on Sornieth? I’ll be sending dragons for some R&R lol.

Soot: Excuse me, Lady Soot. I love this girl. I don’t even want to think of what the scrollcase cost you, my goodness. I love her accent, especially the way it colors her feathers on the head and neck. The gold accent from the apparel are a more than fitting touch. You have a lot of really wonderful art in her bio. I think Alpine’s Terracotta pot is my favorite because it’s just so unique. I’m completely fascinated by this rumored relationship with the Flamecaller, quite an experience to have had if true.

Ketut: Ocean man take me by the hand lead me to your land. His accent is so good and so tropical! It really adds a lot to him, it’s practically not even an accent at all it just feels like it belongs there. And the flatfins and the runebeads... it’s just so good. I love the way his bio is written out and his story of how he fell in love with Rhonda (Props to Lex! You do great work dude). You have very lovely artwork in his bio. The drawing of him and Rhonda just melts my heart, you can really see the shared love between them.

Trellis: Pumpkin Skink is a new one for me and wow it’s good! I love the way it fades into her wings, the softer Peridot green compliments her primary very well. Witch’s Blight is a favorite accent and it’s interesting to see it used on such a bright colored dragon because it really doesn’t take away from her colors at all. I wasn’t surprised to learn she was a gardener, I think it’s the perfect role for her. I like that she has a huge crush on Dahlia and brings her flowers, that’s just adorable.

Raine: I couldn’t resist her colors. The way the lantern glow reflects on her shimmery wings and the gold accents around her eyes are to die for. The bright blue of the lightning eyes really pop against her cinnamon colors and her apparel is all well thought out in terms of placement and color choice. “She wont turn down a hard liquor “ oh no she actually is perfect LOL. Her bio is beautiful, I wonder if you have a headcanon singing voice for her? My mind is leaning somewhere very Jazzy though I can’t pin a specific person down.

Jargon: He is SO green and SO good. I love him. I really like that you incorporated how he used to be a fae into his lore and having the fae’s mannerisms be a part of why he is the way he is now with language. I love the art in his bio of him being buried in books, it’s not hard to imagine him in that situation often. I really love the way ghost looks on him and the apparel he uses, especially around his head by covering the eyewear with the bandana to still leave the charred effect on his snoot.

Rug: I saw his name and basically just went “yeah I’m writing about you”. This is also fitting because I just finished watching the original Indiana Jones trilogy for the first time recently. I have to give a special shoutout to Smithsonian for the art in his bio because it’s one of the cutest things I’ve ever seen. I also love Fatalis, oh my goodness. The skin you picked for him was a great choice and I love his apparel layering and his animal companions. Maybe he can sell some of his wares to my trade hub?

Aerie: I’m love her?? And she’s a Gryphon!! I love the skin, it’s one of the best fest skins we’ve ever gotten and it looks so beautiful on her. I love the subtle hint of green from her spines and how they correlate with her eye color. I almost didn’t notice them at first but I’m glad I did because it’s such a nice touch. It’s very interesting how you’ve woven these Gryphons into your lore and I love the description and art you have of the Aviary. I like that she’s willing to work as a guide for dragons through their territory (even if for a fee, it’s still an interesting role).

Matoya: I couldn’t resist picking this girl, her flashy wings lull me right in. Was her skin a custom made just for her? It’s incredible! Her lore was good until you mentioned that her kids and grandkids don’t really ever write or visit and now I’m sad. Can she please adopt me so I can visit and bring her gifts. I love her so much. I think she and my Snapper Wrex would get along very well, he’s a lonely guy too. I just have so many feelings about this snapper that I wasn’t expecting, I want to protect her forever.

[whydoyouwantmyname]

Imagine being Snape’s foster child (Years 4-6)

2-12

13

-During the summer you went to the Weasley's as usual, and were there when Harry came to visit. 

"You boys are fully aware that Molly knows you were out?" You asked the boys as the silently tried to sneak into the house. 

"I thought you said you would cover for us?" George snapped playfully 

 "Well I can't quite break the charmed clock now can I?" You barked back, pointing at the clock which was identifying that the boys were home. 

 -you tried hard not to laugh when Molly yelled at the boys. After her speech you rose and began helping her cook, apologizing that she allowed the twins and Ron to leave. 

"Oh sweetheart it isn't your fault, I would have done the same thing if I had friends who wanted to save my little brother." 

 -You went back to Hogwarts while the Weasleys and Harry went book shopping, cause Snape made sure you already had everything you needed. 

-He also bought you advanced potion books, along with a new cauldron. 

       "Dad you really didn't have to." 

       "Yes I did." 

 -Snape requested you be placed in an advanced potions class instead of Defense against the Dark Arts, cause he didn't trust Lockheart as a professor. His request was denied. 

 -Once joking about how Lockheart was probably a coward. 

 -within the first week you and the Twins had pranked at least 87% of the staff, your favorite so far was when you turned all Treadhorny's tea leaves into butterflies. 

 -"you should be focused on your studies, not on creating childish antics with the two Weasley spawns." Snape hissed at you, as you sat at one of the desks after hours, working on your divination homework. 

       "Well as you can see I currently am." 

       "Yes along with thinking of the next prank, I know for a fact those two could never have made that voice altering potion slipped into professor Flick's morning pumpkin juice." 

 -when the attacks started to occur Snape was panicked that someone was going to find out about you, seeing how they were no doubt a follower. 

 -you calmed him down, swearing you wouldn't die, 

    “I mean why would they go after me to begin with, for I am not a mudblood.” 

    “Yes and a Potter.”

    “And no one but the Weasleys, Harry, and Hermonie know that.”

-You were the third one petrified. You were setting up a prank in an empty classroom, while Fred and George were acting as the look outs on either end of the hall. They noticed you were inside for far too long, and when they opened the door they found you by the windows of the room, and failed to notice the open grate on the floor behind you.

- Snape was unaware, when it occurred he had been called away to collect a box of ingredients you wanted to use to make a potion, upon returning to the grounds Albus had him called to his office.

- “Headmaster.”

“Severus, I request you remain calm.”

“I am calm sir...”

“I am afraid the creature has attacked once again while you were away. And it appears that [Y/N] has been petrified.”

“Excuse me.” Snape snapped, salt water began to threaten his eyes as he looked at Albus.

“I had her placed in her old quarters in the dungeon if you would...” and with that Snape fled the office, in disbelief.

-When he entered your room and saw your body in the bed he sank to the floor, the tears freely falling as he struggled to breathe.

-Whenever he wasn’t teaching he was at your side, or trying to find a faster way to unpetrify you.

-He was very cross when it came to the golden trio or the Weasleys, he thought they had shared your true identity with someone. 

-Fred and George tried to figure out where they had you resting, since they were also extremely torn up about what occurred, however Snape refused to let them see you.

-Snape read to you every night, either a potion book, or a childhood story he would tell you as a child.

-He would cry at least once a day, and beg you to wake up even though he knew you wouldn’t.

-He snapped at the Twins once in his class, because they were unable to make a potion.

“Well maybe if you both didn’t relay so much on the Black girl you two would be able to make the most simplest of potions! However you both find messing about and pulling childish pranks to be more enjoyable then taking this seriously! No wonder the girl got petrified in your care, you both were probably too busy lighting off a stink bomb to even notice you were putting her in danger!”

-When you finally were unpetrifired, you sat up and immediately hugged Snape, who was at your bedside while they administrated the cure. 

-Snape told you everything, and when it was all said you quickly stood from the bed and ran out of the room, Snape close behind. 

-He followed you to the room where Arthur and Molly were gathered, Ginny stood between them. You quickly entered the room, and when Ginny saw you she had tears streaming down her face. You moved forward and embraced the crying girl.

“I d-d-d-didn’t know, a-a-a-af-after it attacked you I-I tr-tried to g-get rid of it...”She stuttered into your blouse.

“Shhhhh shhhh Ginny, it is okay. It wasn’t your fault.” You comforted as she clung to you tighter. Snape stood outside the door and listened, his heart breaking at the forgiveness you gave.

-That summer you didn’t go to the Weasley’s, you stayed with Snape, and made potions. However you wrote Fred and George a letter at least once a week, as did they.

-You asked Snape to go easy on the twins this coming school year, since you were in a different potions then they were this year. And you were not taking Defense against the Dark arts, at all.

-Snape told Albus that he felt it was inappropriate to have you in a class with a man who could so easily blow your cover. He complided, knowing there was a deeper reason for Snape’s plead.

-When the students returned you were waiting at the platform with Hagrid, and as soon as you saw the messes of red hair, you took off towards them and basically leapt into Fred’s arms. After a long hug, you unhinged and quickly hugged George.

-Snape was glaring down Lupin during the feast, which did not go unnoticed to you. 

“So you going to tell me what your issue with the new Defense Against the Dark Arts professor is?”

“Nothing.”

“It is n’t nothing, and I know who he is. So tell me now, before I go and ask him questions about my father.”

-That was the night Snape told you about all the bullying, and you listened.

-At the end of the story, you had a different view of your father 

-When the school went in lock down due to Sirius’s possible entrance into the castle, you went to your old room in the dungeon.... with a certain red headed Weasely.

-When Snape didn’t see you in the Great Hall he thought nothing of it, but when he saw only one twin, he quickly made his way to your room, where he found you cuddled up asleep with the redheaded joker.

-As much as he knew that he should be angry, he couldn’t be.

-He never brought it up that he saw you both, and you didn’t tell him that you were dating him till you both hit the 8th month mark of your relationship.

-He just hummed in response, unsure how one would react to their teenage daughter dating. 

-You cried when Buckbeak got sentenced to death, and wanted to be there when it happened to support Hagrid, however Snape wouldn’t let you go. 

-You were the only student who knew about the time turner, and when it happened told Hermonie she should go back in time and stop Draco from being an idiot.

-He once got you and Fred snogging in the hall, and it took all his strength to not be enraged at the boy. 

-Before you told Snape, he hinted at your relationship with Fred in class, Fred always told you too what he would say, and while it didn’t bother Fred, it did you however, which is what led you to tell him.

-”Now today we shall be learning how to make potions of lust, one drop will make your drinker fall hoplessly in love with you. However I am sure not everyone needs this, isn’t that right Mr. Weasley?”

“Here is a truth serum, if I were to give this to anyone of you, you could reveal your darkest secrets, like bank account numbers, test grades, involvement with organizations, secret relationships.”

-”Okay I am going to tell you something, and you can’t be mad.” 

“What.” He flipped half of his paper down, looking at you in wonder.

“I have been dating the Weasley boy since September.” You expected an explosion of a response.

“Hmmmmm.”

“That is all?”

“Hmmmm.”

“Please don’t poison his pumpkin juice.”

“Hmmmmm.”

“Oh Goodness you already did.”

“Hmmmmmm.”

-Fred was in the hospital wing that afternoon.

-Harry told you everything about Sirius, and how he helped to free him and concerted running away with him, you told him he should.

-Spending the summer with the Weasley’s that year, and Molly thinking you and Fred where adorable together.

“I knew it from the moment I met you my dear, you were going to turn my Freddy into an honest man.”

-You and the twins explored the campsite as soon as you got to the tournament, and almost bumped into the Viktor Krum, however you dragged both boys away (Seeing how they wanted the charm his broom)

-When you reached your spots in the stand Fred stood behind you, his hands resting on your waist as you cheered for the Irish.

-When the death eater attack happened you got separated, and ended up in the field with Harry, both of you knocked unconscious. 

-You both woke up to see the casting of the Dark Mark in the sky, and when the scar burned you were there to try and comfort Harry.

-When Fred saw you were safe upon returning he wrapped you in a warm embrace, “I thought I lost you.”

“You can’t get rid of me that easy Weasley.” You smiled

-Fred begged you not to go home to Hogwarts with Hagrid.

-”I have to babe, gotta tend to the garden.” His reflection pouted at you as you tied your hair back in the mirror, “Don’t give me that look, it is only three days before school starts.”

“The longest three days of my life.” He sighed as you turned around and looked at him

“You will survive.”You sighed, before walking forward and kissing his head before aerating into the dungeon.

-”You know you shouldn’t be doing that, the floo powder system works just fine.” Snape scolded.

“Yes well however I had to leave fast, before Fred convinced me to stay.”

“Hmmm.” He replied as you rolled your eyes and hurried back to your dorm, in the Gryffindor common room.

 -“So he is coming back?” You asked Snape the next day as you both did inventory of the potions chamber. Your eyes fixated on Snape as he looked anywhere but at you.

“I am afraid so.” his voice was filled with sorrow.

“Am I in danger?” You asked, already aware that the return of Voldemort would result in the danger level around Harry to rise.

“I am unsure.” he breathed out, before looking at you with teary eyes.

-Snape was extra protective of you, he also made certain requests.

“So I never want you alone with anyone except the Weasley boy, and that is ONLY when you are in the castle.Also you can not be alone with any Slytherins.”

“Ok.’

“And absolutely...”

“No one can know I am your foster daughter, or a Potter.” You replied

-Moody found out who you were though, and started plotting.

-You smacked Fred’s chest playfully when he checked out the Beauxbaton girl’s flowing mini skirts.

-You purposely messed up the boy’s potion.

“Watch this.” You whispered to Lee, before the boys drank the liquid. 

-You told Fred and George they made hot elderly men, and then took them to Snape to make them a cure.

-When Harry’s name got called, your heart dropped, your hand rocketing to Fred’s thigh.

-Snape comforted you, after expressing your thoughts about Harry’s involvement.

-You scolded Fred and George for making merch to sell. 

-When the ball happened you and Fred left after the first dance, and sat beside the lake in your formal attire and drank.

-You were viewed as smarted then most of the girls from Beauxbaton’s, which made your father smile. Especially when Fluer, their grand champion, blew up a potion in her face, while you had a leaf dying in yours. 

-You snuck out one night, and had tea with Hagrid, telling him all about your relationship with Fred.

-When Cedric came back with Harry died, you were devastated by his cries. “He’s Back He’s Back!”

-You followed Moody when he drug Harry to his office, and snuck in after him. When he was advancing Harry, rambling of himself, you throw yourself protectively in front of Harry.

-Snape wanted you under constant protection..... 

-You refused

[rainhorn6-blog]

What I Read: July 2018 | Recommendations for Books to Read

If you’re looking for a good book to read, you’ve come to the right place. This post is part of my monthly “What I Read” series, featuring the books I read the previous month with lots of recommendations for you! All of these book pair perfectly with donuts, cookies, pasta, or pizza… And always a glass of wine.

Have you heard of Tsundoku? It’s a Japanese term used to describe the art of buying books and then not reading them. If you saw the piles of books in my house, you would totally know that I practice tsundoku in a major way. So much so that my husband sent me this article and was like “um hello, this is you.” But it’s not like I’m over here just collecting books. I promise! I only buy books I truly want to read and I have every intention of reading every book that’s currently on my bookshelf or sitting in a pile around my house… At some point. The problem is, the piles keep growing and my reading time is not expanding. Nine books in a month sounds like a huge amount to some people, but at this rate, I’ll never get through all of the books I want to read. I also get a lot of books sent to me and absolutely love reading new releases, so sometimes I have to remind myself to go back and grab something from one of my piles. Oh, and let’s not even talk about my “virtual piles” of electronic books. You can’t see them, so as far as you’re concerned, they don’t exist, OK?

Anyway, in this month of reading, most of my books are “newbies,” but I did grab two older books, one that I actually re-read (Crazy Rich Asians) and one that has been on my to read list for a long time (The Song of Achilles). I’m going to start making even more effort to read some of the “older” books I’ve been collecting, instead of simply grabbing the new shiny things!

Do you have an insane amount of books at your house or apartment, too? Or do you have more self-restraint than I do?

In any event, I’m excited to share my July month of reading with you! (Just an FYI that links to some of the books below are affiliate links. Thank you for supporting WANM!). And don’t forget to follow my book Instagram account (bookstagram!) at @booksontheside!

The Other Woman by Sandie Jones: If you think you have an evil mother-in-law, you need to meet Pammie. Yikes! When Emily meets Adam, she quickly falls in love with him… But then she meets his mom. Pammie is that kind of evil that is veiled behind sweetness, so not everyone sees it. She’s absolutely horrible to Emily, but in ways that make Emily question whether she’s paranoid or being overly petty. This was a page turner for me because Pammie’s behavior is so ridiculous and I couldn’t wait to see what she’d do next. But honestly, I had a hard time justifying why Emily put up with so much! Her love for Adam wasn’t totally believable to me, at least not to the point where she’d put up with Pammie’s antics. I wanted to jump into the book and shake her. I also didn’t love the ending and felt like it was a little rushed… But overall, this is a fun not-too-scary, but still suspenseful thriller perfect for a light read. Also, if you have issues with your mother-in-law, this book may end up making you thankful for her! The Other Woman’s official pub date is August 21, but you can pre-order it now. (thanks to the publisher for my copy of this book!)

Campaign Widows by Aimee Agresti: OK, I have some mixed feelings about this one. I enjoyed it because it’s a fun (very fictional) look inside a presidential campaign, showcasing what the presidential campaigns experience is like for spouses of candidates, staff members, journalists, etc. It follows five self-proclaimed “campaign widows” during a presidential election season. The main widow is Cady, who has picked up her whole life to move to DC to be with her boyfriend (turned fiancé) who is working for a presidential hopeful. As a producer on a news program, Cady covers much of the election and is also thankfully thrown into a group of other campaign widows who can commiserate with one another. My main issue with the book is that there are so many characters, it was a bit hard for me to keep them all straight and get fully sucked into the story. But I still enjoyed the story and feel like this is another one of those light fun summer books that’s perfect to read on vacation. (thanks to the publisher for my copy of this book!)

My Squirrel Days by Ellie Kemper: It’s hard not to love Ellie Kemper (in case you’re like “huh? who?? You probably know her as either a) Erin on The Office, b) Kimmy Schmidt, or c) Becca in Bridemaids). I’ve been a fan of Ellie for a long time, but was slightly worried about this book because I feel like she’s so typecast and has such a voice that, while endearing, can also be a tad bit annoying. Her memoir ended up showing me that she basically has all the good parts of her characters in her real personality (sweet, kind, quirky), but is also so much more (smart, down-to-Earth). Her “Kimmy Schmidt voice” (how I refer to it!) definitely comes out at times, but not to the point of ridiculousness. I loved this book because I learned so much about Ellie that I had no idea about, including the fact that she had such a seemingly normal childhood and one that I could relate to in many ways. She always loved performing, but wasn’t a child actor and didn’t even really get into acting until doing improv in college (after quitting the field hockey team). She’s just so normal, likable, a humble. I didn’t love every single essay in the book and have definitely laughed more reading other memoirs, but still really enjoyed the book… And now want Ellie Kemper to be my bff. My Squirrel Days’ official pub date is October 9, but you can pre-order it now (thanks to NetGalley for my copy of this book!)

The Garden Party by Grace Dane Mazur: This definitely wasn’t my favorite book of the month, but I do think it’s beautifully written and I loved the concept of it from the moment I read the description- two families come together for the wedding rehearsal dinner of their children. The families are quite different (though seem much more alike than they think!) and both have worries and apprehensions about the dinner. I think many people can relate to this as there are always some nerves involved when bringing together the families of significant others. I love that this novel takes place all in one evening and that we get peeks into each unique character’s lives.  But this is another book with a ton of characters that are tough to keep straight and some I thought could have been cut all together. However, I have to mention again that the prose is beautiful (though in some spots a little too flowery) and I think this is the kind of book I’d enjoy much more were I to read it a second time and really let myself sink into every sentence, reflecting on its full meaning. If you have time to sink into this book, do so, but just know that it may leave you wanting more. (thanks to the publisher for my copy of this book!)

Crazy Rich Asians by Kevin Kwan: OK, this was actually my second time reading this book, but with the movie coming out this month, I had to read it again! Also, I let over a year go by between reading the first and second books of the series and realized that I had forgotten way too much needed to brush up. It actually kind of felt like I was reading it for the first time… So, I guess that’s one of the benefits of my normal book amnesia (LOL). I also read this along with a reading group I’m in on Instagram and that made it even more enjoyable as we got to discuss it as we read. The story follows multiple characters of a (very!) wealthy Asian family, but really centers on Nick and Rachel. After college, Nick left his family in Singapore and moved to New York City, where he meets Rachel, an American Chinese girl from a “normal” family. She has absolutely no idea of his extreme wealth (and crazy family) until he takes her to visit his family where everyone is ridiculously rich and obsessed with money and status. Sure, the book is a little bit outrageous at times and incredibly un-relatable, but that’s also what makes it fun. Now I’m even more excited for the movie and two followup books!

The Summer Wives by Beatriz Williams: I pretty much always enjoy novels from Beatriz Williams and will likely forever read her new releases, though my biggest criticism about them is that they aren’t always super memorable to me. But they are enjoyable and in many cases, that’s exactly what I want when I’m reading (as I’ve mentioned before, I’m not great at retaining lots of info about all the books I read anyway). This book jumps between a few time periods. One in the early 1950s when 18-year-old Miranda Schuyler arrives on Winthrop Island with her mother who is set to marry the wealthy Hugh Fisher. Miranda gets to know the island with her new step-sister Isobel and lobsterman Joseph Vargas. We also jump to the late 1960s when Miranda is returning to the island after some sort of accident and a long time away from the island. In between these scenes, we go back to the 1930s and learn some of the happenings and relationships on the island during those times. The Summer Wives is the kind of book that had me quickly turning the pages wanting to know how everything would tie together and what exactly happened in the various phases of Miranda’s life. Even though I haven’t been thinking about it a ton since I finished it, I still thoroughly enjoyed reading it! (thanks to the publisher for my copy of this book!)

The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller: This one has been on my must-read list for forever since I’ve heard so much good stuff about it. I’m happy to say that it didn’t disappoint, though it’s definitely a bit different than my normal book loves and may not be for everyone! I admit, it isn’t really the type of book I’d usually pick up; war stories with lots of battle scenes aren’t quite my thing. But The Song of Achilles is about so much more than battle scenes and has such a focus on relationships and emotions that I couldn’t help but get sucked in. The book left me feeling all kinds of things and wanting to take a seriously deep dive into Greek mythology… So, I’m calling it a definite win. The story revolves around Patroclus, his childhood, and how he first comes to meet Achilles. I love how the book is set up and I feel like all the details Miller includes are so intentional and essential to the story and our emotions. As his relationship with Achilles grows, the feelings between them feel so believable and real. The decisions they make are often heart-wrenching and they deal with situations I can’t imagine myself in. Yes, there are plenty of battle scenes (how the heck did this war last for so long?!), but they’re also quite intentional and everything always goes back to the relationships. This is one that I definitely want to re-read at some point and I think I’ll gain something new from it every time I do! And now I’m extra excited to read Miller’s next book Circe (which is sitting on my shelf waiting for me!).

All Your Perfects by Colleen Hoover: I know so many people who are obsessed with Colleen Hoover books; I’m pretty sure she has some of the biggest super fans around. I definitely wouldn’t say I’m obsessed with her, but I do really enjoy her books and am happy to grab her new releases as soon as I can. Sometimes her books just feel way too dramatic to me… But I’m happy to say All Your Perfects is my favorite from her thus far. In true Hoover fashion, it’s a very dramatic book… But in ways that feel really realistic and right. The book bounces back and forth from the past (about 7 years ago) to the present. It starts with Quinn heading to her fiancé, Ethan’s apartment, only to run into a random guys sitting in front of Ethan’s apartment door. Why was he there? Well, because his girlfriend was inside Ethan’s apartment in bed with him (I promise I’m not spoiling anything). Flash forward more than seven years and we learn that Quinn and this mystery man Graham are now married (so cute!), but seem to be on the brink of divorce in large part due to trouble with infertility. The book feels so powerful because in the sections that take place in the past, we can easily see how crazy deep in love Quinn and Graham are… In some ways, you think “how could a couple like this ever want to leave each other?” But then in the sections that take place in the present, we gain a very clear understanding of why their marriage is struggling so much. This is definitely an emotional book and one that may be difficult for some people to read if only because it’s so real and spot-on. Hoover does an excellent job dealing with a very tough subject matter that’s relevant to so many people. And even if it’s not relevant to you, you’ll still be able to feel for this couple and get completely immersed in their story. If you haven’t read any Hoover yet, make this your first one. (thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for my copy of this book!)

The Masterpiece by Fiona Davis: You know this book is going to be up my alley because it’s historical fiction that takes place in NYC. For some reason, this is the first book from Fiona Davis I’ve read, but now I definitely want to check out her other releases. This story bounces back and forth between two time periods- the 1920s and 1970s- and focuses on the art school that once lived within Grand Central Terminal. In the 1920s, it’s a popular and respected place to take art classes. In the 1970s, it’s completely abandoned and not many people even know it was ever there. The school really did exist, though the story Fiona Davis tells in The Masterpiece is fictional. We follow Clara Darden, a teacher at the school in the 1920s and and blossoming illustrator striving to get her fashion-focused illustrations published in Vogue and the like. We also follow Virginia Clay, a recently divorced mother, struggling to make ends meet in the 1970s, with a new job at the Grand Central Station information booth who discovers the abandoned art school. The women are incredibly different, but both ambitious and determined and I felt immediate connections with both of them. I love how Davis intertwined the two time periods and how she managed to bring everything together at the end (with a bit of a twist I definitely wasn’t expecting!). It’s the kind of book that has you missing the characters once you’re done reading it. It also has me wanting to take a trip to NYC to wander around Grand Central Station and learn more about its history. (thanks to the publisher for my copy of this book!)

And that was my July in books! Spoiler alert… I know we’re not even two weeks in, but I think August is going to be my favorite reading month of 2018 so far! I’m also off on vacation later this week and am hoping to get some seriously good reading time in.

Tell me what you’ve been reading lately!

If you’re looking for more book recommendations, feel free to take a look at my other book review posts from so far in 2018:

What I Read in January What I Read in February What I Read in March What I Read in April What I Read in May What I Read in June

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Source: https://wearenotmartha.com/what-i-read-july-2018-recommendations-for-books-to-read/

[eyes-like-honey]

This day. This day you looked so beautiful. You looked like an angel. An angel that I never wanted to leave. I probably don't deserve you. I'm an evil person. Everyone likes to remind me of that. I've done the most fucked up shit. But I've only done it out of love. The love I wish I could get back but never do. Everyday it seems like your feelings towards me seem to fade more and more. And everyday it gets harder, more and more. I miss passionatly staring into your eyes. I miss the tight hugs I give you, that turned into slow dancing rocking back and forth in our dark living room. The ones the filled me with love I want to have forever. I hope you go back and read the pages of messages I sent you. When you use to look at me a different way. The things I told you, the things I wanted you to know; of why you should be with me. I know words don't mean much to you;and actions do. And I could do a million things for you. But I can't. It's not fair. He has a car. He can get you flowers. He can get all this shit to make love potions to make you fall in love with him again. But I can't. All I can do is write. I use to write all this stuff for myself. To the only person i trusted. But then I began to trust you. And now here I am writing away. I hope you read this. Because I will delete it after today. And I hope you do look at this tumblr everyday. Because i will post things. Things that are hard for me to write. And i probably will delete. I want you so bad. I know I'm crazy. And I know it's cheezy as fuck. But I'm crazy about you. For real. Your the most beautiful and perfect creature I've ever seen. Your laugh fills me up with so much emotions I can't explain. When you stare back I have to look away. Because Its like staring into the eyes of an angel. It's hard to have and hug everything you've ever wanted. And then the next day not being able to hold it. It feels like a cruel game. I fuck up so much shit and i really don't want to fuck this up. But my emotions take over. The only problem I have right now. Is that I can't be with you. Joseph is a gaint barrier I can't break down because I don't want to lose either of you. My phone is full of your pictures and videos. And i look at them everyday. Every fucking day. They're frozen moments of times that make me so happy. When your smiling. When your happy to be with me. And I like to think they're moments of happiness caused by only me. Moments of frozen times where we're both filled with pure happiness. Even this tumblr. I made it because it'll be on the internet forever. Even if it gets deleted. You can go on the dark web and see it. I want the memories of you and I to be forever. And if your not here anymore. Or if Im not here anymore. We can look back at this and remember what could of been. Even if it takes 30 years. And we don't even talk I want you to see this. See what could have been. What a relationship with someone crazy over you could of been. How crazy happy your life could be. The way I act. I acted for you. I never want to hurt you. Even if it feels like you've hurt me. I say shit that I shouldn't. But like I said. I tell you everything. Because that's what you want. That's why I'm writing this. Everything is falling apart. And it's because of joseph. He's here. Always. He's here Always watching. Always when I'm at work. Your alone with him. He tells you things about me. He tells you things to blur your vision of the future and to think of the now. I miss the old days. When we went to Dunkin donuts and get our iced coffees. Where I didn't have to say anything about our future. Where you could imagine and know how us together could be like forever. And how Joseph's and your future looked. I miss the days where we awkwardly went to stores and the mall together and people thought we were together. When you said I can say you were my girlfriend, even when we werent as close as we were today. Before I told you how many feelings I have about you. But now we havnt been hanging out alone. I dont even remember the last time we were alone. The last time I remember was when you ran away and I had to tell joseph to stay away. We were alone at the mall. But I'm pretty sure he was following us. And looking for us. We weren t really alone. But when we were there at the mall together. Even when he was iin the same mall. You were happy. We were happy. We held hands, and hugged. You posted snaps of us. And you didn't care what he saw. I miss you. I miss you so fucking much. And I want it to be like old times when we could spend time alone. I want you to remember the memories because that's all I have, because I'm not sure if I'll be able to have a future with you. And everyday it seems like it's fading more and more. That your forgetting everything we've been through before joseph tried to stop everything we had. Because he's always here. When we were alone. It was real. Real happiness. And now that we don't have real happiness. I'm losing you slowly. I don't want you to have a baby with him because he almost lost you and now he's just going to lock you down with a baby. I don't want you to see him after 9 months holding your baby awkwardly. And not being the person he tells you he'll be. If it took 3 years to finally see what he was doing to you and almost lose you. I don't think your future with him will be okay. I know you guys will have so many problems. And if your already wondering how he's going to look when he holds your baby. I feel like it's already a big red flag. I wish I could show you our future together. How perfect it could be. I wish I could do things for you. The actions and not words you want but like I said it's not fair. I can't even get a ride to the dmv. I can't go get you flowers. I can't go see you on your breaks everyday. Because I WOULD. That way you can never be alone. Guys won't come to you. And I can befriend your friends And we can all go do stuff And go out. And it wouldn't be a burden like it would be for joseph. I want to spend every second with you.i want to go to olive garden and pick up food for you without you askijng so you can eat an amazing dinner when you get home from work. I want to surpirse you with things, and do things for you at home. Like massage your back or feet. I want to take you on crazy adventures. Around tucson and road trips across the country. I want to see the world with you.Joseph can do that stuff RIGHT NOW and before and he doesnt. He can make you happy. But not pure happiness. I know I can do that. I can do that for you but if your still not choosing, joseph will shut everythijng I do with you down. Because he thinks I'm not allowed too. Seriously everything he's doing right now. Is stuff i told him to do 3 years ago. And stuff I told him right now in the middle of this shit storm to help him look good even when I'm trying to get you too. To help.him out. Now it feels like it's biting me in the ass. But it's only the basics I told him. And he's only doing the basics. I'm not basic. I will be extra. Your the girl that needs the extra. The one that need more than just a guy that loves you. You need someone to make your life the most amazing ever. Don't you want to live life happy everyday? Don't you want to brag to your friends and hair stylist/when you go to the nail salon about your bf? Don't you want girls telling you how lucky of a gf you are? How they wish they found a guy like me? I know I can do that. And I never lie to you. You are precious as fuck and I don't want to lose you ever. Because I can see our future together. Our future nights out. our future adventures. Our future wedding. Our baby. Our future house. Our future as old people. Before you I was literally nothing. No had no purpose in life. Art was just a distraction. I was waiting for my mona Lisa, the masterpiece and art I want to stare at my whole life. And you see me. Staring at you. Even when I'm not at you or your mad at me. I look at you in awe. Your not mine. But you see me amazed by you. Your personality. Your jokes. Your smile. Your stare. You tiny ears. Your laugh. I see your goals in life. I see where you want your future to be. I see everything about you. When i stare at you. And when you stare back. I see not only you. But my reflection in your big beautiful brown honey eyes. I see how all of you and how all of me can be together. And I'm forced to look away because my heart beats too fast. I start to not breathe. Because knowing I can't have it. Terrifys me. My body is trying to kill itself when we look into each other's eyes. Because it just wants to go to a place where me and you are a thing. To go to a heaven to stare at you forever. I want you to believe were soul mates. But I can't when we can't even be alone anymore.like we use to. When we had fun pretending we were bf and gf. Tonight I'll be trying to fall asleep and you'll be in the room with joseph with the door closed. Most likely going to have sex. Even though last time you had sex with joseph on acid. He said some horrible stuff about you and how you looked like to him and how it traumatized him. But when hes horny it doesn't matter who you or what you look like to him. He'll still try. And while in there. I'll be going crazy inside. I've been trying so hard to not let my emotions go crazy. But you mean everything to me. Your are the only thing I care about in this world. And when your not by my side . I go crazy. When your locked in your room with him with the door closed. It seems like you choose him and not me. Someone who destroyed what you could of had. And is picking up the pieces and your letting him super glue it all together. Rather than the guy that would NEVER let it get to that point. And when we were alone. I know you know I can make you happy forever. And its the happiness you want forever. Please for the love of god though. Don't go into his room when your on acid.ornhave sex with him. I care about you. And I hope you care about me enough to respect me. I can't tell you what to do.or how to feel. But if you know it hurts me please dont do it. I would never intentionally want to hurt you emotionally. If i knew you didn't want me to do something I would never ever do it. And even when your high. I want you to remember me. And maybe think about us. And not only him. Just because can be there and not me. Remember you said you'd rather be with me than him at the mall. Remember if he wasn't here you would choose me and not him. You even told him that to his face. I am fucking crazy. But it's a good type of crazy I swear. It's only for you. I will give you a baby today. I know I can handle everything. Unlike him. I'm mature and I've had so much more responsibility in my life than him. I pretty much raised joseph and every baby animals or toddler myself. The foster kids. 4 kids and i was more of a parent than my own mother. I quit my job for them.when my mom babysat a relatives toddler. I was always there to take care of them too. I know can be a father. And I'm crazy enough about you to be your babies father. I want to prove to you how serious I am about you. I swear to god . Choose me. I'll give you eveything youve ever wanted and more. And you won't regret it. If you choose me. I can finally show you. In just need a chance. The chance joseph got and failed.

[itsashleymcdonald19blog-blog]

6/25/17 x2 (Time change is a mess)

Well this morning was supposed to start off much earlier than it did.. Funny story, last night, when I set an alarm for 5:30 am it was set for weekdays and considering today was not a weekend it didn’t go off. Instead, the alarm that was supposed to warn me 5 minutes before leaving was the alarm that woke me up. Nia and I were so panicked and so rushed and lets just say it is a miracle that we did as much packing as we did last night. Essentially all we had to do was change, and put a few things away. We rushed so fast and got ready with literally 4 minutes to spare before having to be down stairs to catch the bus. Wow, we really could have missed our coach, which would have made us miss our flight, and well I do not even want to think about that. We made it though! Thank god!

We headed to the airport and got to experience true Sydney traffic. People drive crazy here, especially in a big bus. We made it to the airport, got our luggage off the coach and headed into the terminal to check in. Check in was smooth so they we headed to customs. Customs operated the same way that it did in Melbourne. You took your passport, had to put it into this scanner essentially, then it directs you when to move through the gate, and then you have to do whatever you look like in your passport in order to be cleared through to the next checkpoint. Honestly, it is really cool, and helps Border Patrol to have less work. It is extremely effective and it was very impressive. I wonder how long it will take the states to hop on this bandwagon.

Then we went through security, nice and smooth, and then made our way to the gate. We grabbed some breakfast, and just waited until it was time to board the plane. I was and still am dreading this flight. I am genuinely worried about my ears, and i just wish I could be in a place of comfort right now. Even though this flight is 2 hours shorter than when we came here we are now flying in the day so we have to at least try to stay awake for 7 hours of it. You can only sit for so long and watch so many movies, and have no wifi. After this, I will not want to fly for a long while.

I am currently sitting on the plane and I cannot help but to reflect on this entire trip. There have been highs and lows (literally) but overall I do not think I could have asked for a better experience abroad. I have travelled almost 20,000 miles, been to 7 different cities, and conquered a good portion of the continent.

Throughout my time here in Australia I have done some amazing things. I will list a few here:

I have eaten some of the weirdest food I have ever eaten in my life. Seriously everything in Australia is different.

I have drank some of the best coffee at some of the most hole in the wall cafes. 

I immersed myself in cafe culture.

I had class at the Melbourne State Victoria Library.

I have gone to many museums (too many museums).

I have found some great rooftop bars.

I wandered in the alley ways of Melbourne to find hidden treasures. (Some of my favorites were Hoiser, Hardware, and Degraves).

I went up to the Eurekya Sky deck which is the tallest building in Melbourne.

We all bonded with Asian Beer Cafe (ABC- also the place that shall not be named)

I rode the Melbourne Star Observatory over the nighttime skyline.

I leaned a lot about the Aboriginal culture through our guides and classes.

I saw wild koalas, wallabies and kangaroos.

I saw thousands of penguins migrate from sea to land at Peter Island.

I shopped at the Queen Victoria Market which is the largest Open Air Market in the Western Hemisphere.

I visited the Shrine of Remembrance and the Melbourne Botanical Gardens

I went and saw a footie game in Melbourne's largest and most famous stadium.  

I travelled to St. Kilda beach and Luna Park.

I went to Federation Square many times.

I travelled to Port Douglas where we went to one of the most beautiful beaches, ate some great fish and chips, and had some great gelato.

I was able to feed and pet kangaroos and wallabies, and I got to hold a koala!

I snorkeled on the Great Barrier reef with one of the most legendary people who snorkel on the reef and call it home.  

I went to Karaoke night at Iron Bar

I stayed in an ecolodge where I really had to face my fear with bugs. Shout out to all the insects and bugs in our cabin.

I swam in a spring fed creek (and fell).

I watched a movie in the outback under the stars.

I went caving and spelunking.

I explored Aboriginal art in caves and saw some amazing views of the outback.

I watched the sunset at Balancing Rock.

I tent camped in the freakin' outback. (I will never be camping again).

I had to use a freakin' dunny… never will I ever again.

I made friends with a wallaby dog named Menzy.

I was able to see rescued wallabies and their babies on site in my backyard.

I drove in little yellow busses to the Daintree Rainforest.

I went night spotting 2 too many times.

I went jungle surfing in the Daintree Rainforest.

I ate the most unique gelato you can find in the world at Daintree Ice Cream Co. 

I did the Mijin swing in Cairns (TWICE).

I made friends with some travel company and ended up getting free drinks and food all nigh at Gilligan's. Along with meeting some girls from Ohio and all over the world.

I watched a ladies night pole dancing competition that really turned into a strip club. (YIKES)

I was able to take a harbor cruise in Sydney to experience Vivid Sydney.

I was able to meet up with Lys to celebrate my birthday in Sydney (2 times)!

I went shopping in the Queen Victoria Building and the shopping district in Sydney.

I was able to go to many clubs and spend many late nights with these amazing people I now call my friends.

I traveled to Bondi and Coogee beach.

I was able to attend the Sydney Film Festival and see the premier of Okja (which everyone should see)

I toured the Sydney Opera House and saw a show called Hot Brown Honey!! (The best show I have ever seen)

I went to St. Mary’s Cathedral.

I visited the Hyde Barracks and Hyde Park.

I climbed the Pylons on the Sydney Harbor Bridge

I went whale watching

I tried Kangaroo.

These are just some of the highlights, I know thats a long list, but that is because there isn’t enough words or time to explain everything I have done this trip or what I have learned.

I have learned a lot about myself throughout this trip. One big thing, as silly as it seems, is how much we take for granted cell service and wifi everywhere. Throughout this trip I did not purchase a phone plan so the only time I could use my phone was when there was wifi. I was unable to use maps to navigate through the city, I was unable to talk to friends and family, and I realized how much I use my phone for things. It was refreshing in a way to “unplug” sort of speak but I also now realize the next time I go to another country at least data will be necessary for navigation.

I also learned that I am not as great with directions as I had originally believed. Typically on family vacations I am the navigator and I have a very good idea of my whereabouts, however, this was not the case here in Australia. I spent most of my time turned around, and dependent on Kayla’s maps. When I finally got it down, it was basically time to leave.

I also realized that I am moderately high maintenance.  Prior to this trip, I felt that I was relatively low maintenance but this trip has changed my perspective to moderate. I hate bugs, I hate night spotting, I hate when bugs are in my space, I hate seeing the biggest spiders I have in my life, I am not a camper, I hate dunnies and I really enjoy having comfortable accommodations where I do not share them with bugs. I also realized that I am more picky than I thought. For the meals that were provided, for the most part, I ate them, but others I said “not a chance in hell."

This trip slo has reaffirmed that I love American food. As I have mentioned in previous posts, everything in Australia is different. From bacon, to ham, to “burgers”, to their spices and sauces, even their bagels. It was always interesting ordering something at a restaurant and being completely confused on what it was. For example, one of the weirdest things we realized is that in Australia they called everything a burger versus a sandwich. In the states, a burger implies a beef patty, here a burger doesn’t mean patty unless it specifies there’s a patty. Also, there food is all pretty bland, and they rely heavily on sauces, like aioli. I love aioli so this was okay with me. Long story short, I miss American food, I miss ordering and knowing exactly what I am going to get, and I am excited to not have to constantly google what the food is.

Throughout this trip, I realized I have an extreme gelato obsession (problem). I love gelato and we ate it far too much on this trip. I have no regrets, but jesus I will miss gelato .

This trip has also been extremely eye opening to the fact that in America we really are ignorant to other countries and what is happening in their worlds. In Australia, on their news they have a specific segment dedicated to around the world, the biggest highlight being America. In America, we are so sheltered and unconcerned with the rest of the world and I think that this says a lot about us.

I have learned so much about Australia that I could probably talk for days about their national identity, injustices, Aborigines, their colonization, convict culture, and their so called multiculturalism. Throughout one of my classes we examined if Australia is actually multicultural or not and I am confident to say that I do not believe they are to the extent that they preach that they are. We experienced a lot of racism, discriminatory, and ignorant behaviors and comments while in Australia as well as many cultures are incredibly underrepresented in society.

Prior to these classes, I had no idea that Australia was colonized by convicts, I had no idea about the Aboriginal people, stolen generations, hygienic dorms, or any of the injustices they faced, nor did I really have any knowledge about cinametography, or anything about Australia really. This trip has made me much more knowledge about Australia and has showed me how much more there is to learn about the world and every other country in it.

This trip has also made me more confident in traveling by myself. This was the first time I have ever flown without my parents and I did very well. I was initially very anxious about it but at this point we have flown so much it is a breeze. However, that doesn’t mean that I am consistently going to want to do.

This trip has also introduced me to some amazing people. The girl gang: Nia, Kayla, and Morgan have been the girls since day one and we just have gotten significantly closer. We all got along very well, and we balance each other out well too. Cody was also a part of our group, it was always Cody and the girls and I also enjoyed his company. Coming on this trip I was worried because I really didn’t know anyone besides Cici, but surely enough I made some friendships for a lifetime. We are already planning our first reunion once school starts. I met many other people and made many other friends that I am so happy have come in to my life. It will be awesome to see more familiar faces on each campus.

Now, I have talked about all the good, and clearly it out weighs the bad, but it wouldn’t be fair for me to not even talk about the lows. One thing that really bothered me was that to pretty much every event we were late. For someone who is extremely time oriented, this frustrated me. I also felt like a lot of our accommodations could have been nicer in the middle of our trip (not Sydney or Melbourne). I do not do well with bugs in my bed, or in my shower, or pretty much in my space at all. When I am in nature, I am in their space, but when they are in mine, it is a no go. Also, there was not enough time scheduled in between our activities. A lot of the time we had an hour to eat, go to the other side of the city and find our destination. We also were left constantly to fend for ourselves and find things on our own with no help and most people with no cellular or data. We also had way too much work. I believed, along with everyone else, that the reason we had bootcamp was so that the work would be minimal when we were actually abroad. Nope, that wasn’t the case,and to top it all off we have some brutal final projects to complete once we get back. I do have to keep telling myself that it is 6 honors credits but still, it is freakin’ annoying. I wish we had spent at least one more day in Cairns because I loved that city and there was so much to do and see. Lastly, we went to way too many museums. Some were very enjoyable and informative, but all the art museums weren’t necessary, and a lot ended up repeating the same stuff eventually. B esides, these things, I really have nothing to complain about, My biggest frustration was with all of the school work but I am STUDYING abroad so I guess you just have to deal with it.

Everything that was a low, wasn’t truly a low because it was all part of the experience. This trip has pushed my personal limits, it has exposed me to many things I would never do in my normal life, and it has given me a new found appreciation for basic things like plumbing, wifi, air conditioning,and clean beds and accommodations. As you can see, nothing outweighs the highs of this trip. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Sidenote: 

This flight is miserable, we still have 9 hours left and then I have to catch my connecting flight to San Diego. Then my second vacation starts. I am already exhausted, and I am going to be jet lagged so this will be interesting. I am so excited to be reunited with my family, my boyfriend, Zoey, and just normal life again.

Surprisingly, the food was actually pretty good on the way home, much better than on the way here. I am struggling with trying to time my sleep. It is currently 2:15 pm on the 25th and we still have 9 hours of the plane ride left. I will probably attempt to take some medicine soon that will help me pass out so I can try to get a good 5 or 6 hours of rest. The hard part will be staying up for the entire day. Not to mention, trying to wrap my mind around the fact that I will be reliving the 25th again!  

I arrived in Lax at 6:30am after a very long flight. A miserable flight. We went through customs very quickly and it was very similar to Sydney and Melbourne which was cool to see. Baggage claim took forever, granted there were over 800 passengers told distribute luggage to but my patience was wearing thing.

The icing on the cake was when I found out my 10:00 am flight had been delayed until 1:15 pm. I was livid. I physically could not sit int eh airport for that long, nor was it worth it to take a 50 minute flight like that. We ended up getting completely refunded for my flight, canceled it, and then I got an Uber to San Diego.

My driver was very nice and I was in SD before 10:00 am. It was so good to see my parents and the Murphy's and the Mattingly’s! We headed to breakfast and just caught up on everything. I missed them so much!

now it is time for the second vacation to start, the real struggle will be staying awake. Jet lag is about to be REAL. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I don’t think there are words to describe how much I have learned and how life changing this experience abroad has been. I think traveling abroad is dangerous because now all I can think of is “Where to next?”

I am so lucky to have been given this opportunity. I want to thank everybody who pushed me to go abroad, and helped me make it possible. Specifically my parents, who worked so hard and sacrificed so much to be able to help me make my dream a reality. I would like to thank Devin, my friends and family (that includes you Mattingly's and Murphy’s) that either supported me or donated to my funds for this trip, and lastly Barrett Staff, specifically Susan and Miranda who pushed me to go on this adventure. This trip literally wouldn’t have been possible without all of you and I am forever grateful.

Thank you for the memories Australia! Cheers!