#barely!! i hate midterms so bad!!
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im-still-watching-anime · 2 years ago
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absolutely no time for my funky anime thoughts because i have been Very Busy BUT ya girl did just apply for her college graduation!! so!!! i think it’s okay just this once
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courviknight · 7 months ago
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yeah i don’t think i can do this guys 😞 i am a complainer. a whiner, if you will!!! i am going to go through hell for the next 2 weeks i swear im going to explode or smth 😞😞😞
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hannieoftheyear · 6 months ago
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7 Days (kmg)
Can feelings change in only seven days?
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During a seven-day vacation with your friends, you try to get over your feelings for one of them.
Feeling alone, surrounded by people who seem closer to each other than you, you find comfort in the one person that you didn’t know before.
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pairing: kim mingyu x fem reader - inspired by 7days by (G)-Idle
w.c: 26k
genre: best friend's brother, strangers to lovers, fluff, comfort, smut, angst, | content warnings: ages are not specified but mingyu is mentioned to be a little older (once), some anxiety themes, alcohol consumption, MDNI! protected penetration, exhibitionism (just a lil), fingering, masturbation, cum play, lmk if i miss something important!
remember! this is a fictional work, it doesn't represent how any of the real people mentioned are like in real life!
note: this took so long to finish! i've had a crazy couple of months at uni, but luckily i passed all of my midterms :) i really hope you like this ♡♡♡
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ONE WEEK BEFORE
Your eyes focus on the pavement below as you walk, head low and not a single word coming out of your mouth. Your steps and Minghao’s are coordinated, muscle memory moving them forward through the city. Each block memorized in both of your brains, each closed shop and parked car, the blinking lights and broken pieces of pavement, all so familiar to you yet coated with a nostalgic feel. You’ve walked the same path together countless times before, but tonight there’s an awkwardness impossible to shake away.
A third body walks by his side. Sami’s fingers are tangled with his with familiarity as they engage in a conversation you choose not to take part in. A question flies your way every few minutes, and you know they’re trying to include you so you don’t feel out of place, but nothing comes to mind besides one-word answers. You laugh every now and then, just so they know you’re at least a little bit engaged.
The pavement changes color under your feet and you know you’re barely minutes away from your home, finally. You like their company, you really do. And you appreciate them walking you to your door this late at night. But their presence can be suffocating.
You can’t avoid feeling guilty about your... feelings. She's one of your closest friends yet she never mentioned starting a relationship with the guy you were in love with. If you would’ve known, you would’ve never let your feelings progress beyond a tiny crush. You would’ve never deluded yourself into thinking he may also like you. For the record, you never told her either, but the only friend you trusted with your feelings also failed to mention that detail. You felt betrayed at first, but deep down you always knew they were closer to each other than to you.
They’ve been together for months now, but even if you’re used to seeing them kiss and hold hands, the awkwardness in your body doesn’t care. Every time you see him your hands are going to shake, and you mind will go blank. Inside, you can’t help to feel giddy anytime he takes interest in your answers to his questions, and you always feel bad after. So, when they insist that they’ll walk you home, you refuse. Not only you feel awkward around them, but now you have to be the third wheel? You'd rather not. But they don’t take a no for an answer, and thus, your current situation.
Your front door appears on your sight, and you feel instant relief. You're quick to bid them goodbye and thank them for keeping you company. Even though you kept saying they could just turn around and you’ll be fine many times over the walk, you don’t want it to seem like you hate their company. Their presence is not the problem, you are.
As you turn around to open your door, your name is called and you’re instantly facing them again.
“We’re going to Chan’s grandfather’s house on the beach next week. You should come!” Sami invites you with a smile on her face. She says it so sweetly you almost don’t care that they’re telling you with such short notice.
“Oh! I don’t know, I'm kinda behind on some homework for the semester,” it’s not a lie per se, you do have some stuff due after the break, but it can be done in a day. You like your friends, and you always have a good time when you’re all together, but a group of ten people can be overwhelming, “I have to think about it.”
“C’mon it’s spring break! We’ll go to the beach, play card games and get drunk!” Sami tries to convince you again. The fear of missing out on fun times with them starts overpowering your need to run away from your feelings. You think about it for a second too long.
“We really want you to come, please?” Minghao steps in. His statement sounds so honest as he looks at you directly in the eyes. You fear you will never be able to say no to him.
Your gaze can’t stand his for long, his eyes are almost piercing though your soul waiting for an answer. You’re quick to break eye contact and look at Sami, who’s waiting for your answer just as expectantly as Minghao. They’re still holding hands as they face you, fingers interlocked, like there’s some external force that’s keeping them from separating.
What can possibly be worse? Rotting in your bed for a week, thinking about how you could be having more fun away with your friends? Or spend a full week around the man you could never have and his perfect girlfriend? You juggle your options in your head as fast as you can.
“Ok I’ll be there.” You end up saying at the sight of their pleading eyes.
“Great! I’ll text you the details tomorrow, bye!” Sami excitedly replies as they walk away, and the feeling on the pit of your stomach starts to bubble up again. You can just ignore them from time to time. You don't have to spend all 24 hours by their side. It’s completely fine.
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DAY ONE
The week flashes through and, in an instant, you’re already packing for the trip.
Your mind spirals, thinking of excuses to not go, but it stays empty as you zip up your bag, go downstairs, get in a taxi and go to Chan’s place where you’re supposed to meet everyone. It's only a 10-minute ride to his house, but today, it feels like hours. Watching the buildings pass by through the window, the streetlights still on and the sun barely peeking through the horizon, hundreds of thoughts cloud your mind, running through your brain like they’re on a race, competing on which one’s can stress you fastest.
But you calm yourself as soon as you see Chan standing on the sidewalk at the distance. He always looks genuinely happy to see you, always inviting you to hang out because he knows you’re not going to do it yourself. He's just so warm and welcoming, always knows how to make you laugh, even on the toughest moments. He's someone you could call a best friend. When he and Jihyun started dating, it made sense. She’s someone who, in the best way possible, never shuts up. He lets her talk and watches her with glossy eyes, as if what she was saying was the most interesting thing he’s ever heard. In a way, you should’ve known they would’ve been perfect together, but you were too caught up in your own feelings and didn’t notice your two best friends liked each other. Maybe that’s why she confided in Sami instead.
A bear hug welcomes you as soon as you get out of the taxi. Your bag drops on top of your feet as you hug Chan back, squeezing him like you haven’t seen him in ages. You have about three seconds of peace until you have to speak up.
“My bag’s crushing my feet.” You giggle with your mouth right beside Chan’s ear, so he hears you perfectly and laughs with you. He moves down to pick it up himself but is shocked by the weight.
“Did you bring your fucking desk? Why is this so heavy?”
“Hey! I just brought the essentials.” You did in fact only bring essentials, besides plenty of clothes, a lot of underwear just in case, your skincare, a hair drier and a few towels. Years of vacations going wrong taught you that those things can really make the difference.
“It's only a week...”
“A girl always has to be prepared.” You reply mysteriously as you walk away from him and into his house, forcing him to carry your bag inside for you. He follows right behind you, and when you cross the door, another voice welcomes you.
“She’s right you know,” Jihyun tells Chan while hugging you, “last month you forgot the toothpaste when we went to the lake! If I hadn't brought my travel bag you would have yellow teeth right now.” Chan huffs but doesn’t argue with her, he just smiles and gives her a peck.
Sami and Minghao are talking in the kitchen, so you only wave at them. Her shiny long black hair is tied up in two buns, and it contrasts perfectly with his disheveled light brown hair. Gyuri, Vernon and Jeonghan are playing some card game on the coffee table, you could hear her screams from the door, he probably cheated, and she only realized after losing. Miyoo looks at them, with a bored expression that doesn’t change as she sees you walk in.
After saying hi to everyone, you notice your bag already beside a couch, so you sit there. Looking around, you realize you’re the last one to arrive, as all your friends are already here. Right as your about to question what you were waiting for; Chan speaks up again.
“Ok so, Joshua told me yesterday that he couldn’t come, his shitty job didn’t give him the days off,” everyone collectively ‘oohs’ at the news, “and I know we had planned the budget with all ten of us,” He gets interrupted again as Vernon walks out of the bathroom and sits beside him, “so I… invited my big brother. I hope you’re all cool with that I’m sorry I didn’t ask you before it was just so sudden, you all know him he’s chill, and he won’t-"
“It’s ok bro we don’t mind.” Minghao steps in to calm Chan down. Everyone agrees with him instantly and he visibly calms down. It seems everyone has already met Chan’s brother, besides you.
You’ve been to Chan’s house a fair share of times, but almost always his family wasn’t home, and if they were they just kept to their own and let you hang out. And you know your friends sometimes hang out without you, you don’t mind, so they probably are more familiar with Chan’s family than you are. A new addition to the trip doesn’t bother you, you’re probably not gonna talk to him much anyway. You’re usually very quiet around your friends, especially when all of them are around. So, it’s not going to be different this time.
“Great! Then we can start heading our way then.” Everyone stands up and grab their bags simultaneously at his words, eager to finally start the trip.
“You said then two times babe.” You hear Jihyun joke as you head out.
“I know I was nervous ok." Chan laughs with her.
The sun is already out by the time everyone is out the door. Orange rays enlighten the world and blind you lightly if you stare at the fiery sun for too long. It’s a beautiful sight for a long road trip.
You squint, trying to gain your sight back, and the first thing your eyes land on is a truck you’ve never seen before, and a hilariously tall muscular man standing against it. Just when you think you might’ve seen him before, Chan walks over to him and hugs him.
“Oh right, this is my brother,” Chan turns around and speaks directly to you, “I don’t think you’ve met him yet.”
“Our budget savior!” you cheer before directing to his brother, “Hi! I'm Y/N.” Your right hand moves forward to shake his awkwardly.
“I’m Mingyu,” He chuckles lightly at your cheer and shakes your hand back. A tiny, almost unnoticeable, electric current runs through you at the touch, alerting all of your senses. Fortunately, he doesn’t notice because he’s looking at your bag in your other hand and then back up to your eyes, “are you riding with us?”
“Oh! I don’t know,” the question startles you, and you look at Chan panicking a little inside, “if you guys don’t mind!”
“I don’t mind, c’mon,” Mingyu cuts Chan before he can reply, takes your bag out of your hand to put it in the trunk and you follow him back. You take the chance to look back at the other cars, Sami’s already behind the wheel of one of them while Minghao puts Gyuri’s and Miyoo’s bags in their trunk, and Vernon and Jeonghan are already sitting inside the other car, waiting. Your body relaxes, riding with Jihyun, Chan and his brother might be the best option. It’s not that you don’t like the others, but you’re quite sure Miyoo just doesn’t like you, and you’re not close enough with neither Jeonghan nor Vernon to be in a closed space together for six hours.
While Mingyu makes space for your bag in the trunk, your eyes can’t help to scan him up and down. If you thought Chan was buff, nothing could’ve prepared you for his brother. As he moves the heavy bags to accommodate yours, you think his arms are probably double the size as yours, if not more.
“Is this your car?” He finishes placing everything and you ask him something before he can catch you staring.
“It’s our dad’s but I use it more often than him nowadays,” he closes the trunk and finally turns to look at you, “you wanna take the shotgun seat? I don’t want to listen to my brother’s playlist again, I used to like it but now I’m kinda tired of it.”
It takes your brain a second to register what he’s asking you, “it’s fine by me,” you reply in a chuckle and you both start walking to the front of the car, “but I don’t think you’re gonna like my music better, I exclusively only listen to Taylor Swift.”
You hear a gasp coming from him and turn your head aside to find him with his hand on his chest, dramatically looking at you with a shocked face, “how could think that? Can a man not like Taylor Swift?” Your attempts to hold your laugh fail and the back on your hand flies to hit him lightly on the arm.
“I’m not judging you! It was mostly a warning that you’re not gonna hear much diversity in artists.”
“It really is fine by me, I like a few of her tunes by the way.”
“As you should!”
In a few steps, you stop right beside the passenger's door. Mingyu’s about to open the door for you when you hear Chan complaining behind you.
“Hey! I thought I was riding shotgun!”
“Sorry! It seems your brother likes me better already!”
“How could you!” He crosses his arms feigning annoyance and you and Mingyu chuckle at him, your gazes crossing for a second. You sit down, ignoring Chan’s fake complaints, Mingyu closes the door for you and circles around the front of the car to his seat.
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After four hours into the ride, two bathroom stops, tons of singing and shouting to Taylor Swift's hits and Mingyu surprisingly knowing all the lyrics to Anti-Hero, the car sits in a comfortable silence. Chan fell asleep almost half an hour ago, that’s when the karaoke sessions stopped, Jihyun’s reading some book on her phone, Mingyu’s focused on the road and you’re admiring the view. The smell of wet grass from the dew envelopes the car, the wind ruffles your hair harshly, but you don’t care, and every now and then you’ll pass through a farm, and you’ll see the animals from far away.
Conversation strikes up again when Chan wakes up after a loud gasp Jihyun let out because of her book. The car becomes alive with laugher, telling funny stories from high school to Mingyu, and Chan’s complains about how you’re spilling too many secrets to his brother.
Jihyun starts telling a story you heard a million times, so you tune out and take the chance to take a proper look at Mingyu. His eyes are focused on the road, but he’s paying special attention to what’s being told to him, reacting at every detail and asking questions every now and then. His tan skin glows thanks to the morning sun, you can see a tiny glint in his eyes and how his nose scrunches when he giggles, but what catches your attention the most are his moles, highlighted by the sunlight, there are a few sprinkled on his cheeks and an especially cute one on the tip of his nose. It's undeniable that Mingyu is very handsome, and polite, and funny, and hot, and if you weren’t so stuck in your feelings, you know you’d probably crush on him for the whole trip.
How come you’ve never noticed him before? You’re sure he must’ve been at Chan’s house at the same time as you at least a couple of times, but you don’t remember ever saying hi to him. You think you’d remember him.
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Chan and Mingyu’s grandparent’s house is huge. It’s probably more of a mansion than a house. Each of you have your separate individual rooms, and the two couples get the two big rooms. The entrance has a shoe rack that can fit almost twenty pairs of shoes, the kitchen has two ovens and the biggest island you’ve ever seen (and probably ever see) and the living room has couches so big that you could take a nap, and everyone would still be able to sit comfortably. Right by the living room there’s a door to a small back porch that goes straight to the beach. It’s peaceful and beautiful and you wish you could stay here more time.
After snooping around the house, you finally go to your bedroom, that’s luckily on the first floor, and settle your stuff down. The room is almost as big as your own living room. There’s even a desk where you can put your laptop and a few drawers for your clothes, but what takes the cake is the on-suite bathroom that has a full-length mirror and a bathtub as big as the bed.
You must’ve been exhausted because as soon as you lay in bed you fall asleep.
When you wake up, the sun is starting to set and the smell of something being cooked fills your nostrils. Three soft knocks at your door wake you out of your trance, and the mysterious person opens your door just barely enough.
“Hey,” Jihyun whispers, her head peeking inside, “we're setting up the table for dinner.”
“I’ll be right out.” You half moan half whisper in your sleepy voice.
It’s kind of funny in a way. When you go out of your room after a nap that was definitely too long, the door of the room right in front opens at the same time, revealing a just woken up Mingyu. It’s funny, that you both, being the ones less close with the rest of the group, end up together in this side of the house, the only rooms on this corridor, while the other two rooms downstairs are across the house and the rest are upstairs.
“You took a nap too?” You ask Mingyu as you walk towards the dining room side by side.
“Is it that obvious?” His voice is still raspy.
“Not at all, if we don’t take in account the messy hair or that your shirt is inside out.” You joke, still a little sleepy.
“Oh shit.” The innocent conversation completely shifts when he stops in his tracks, takes his shirt off to and puts it back the right way. You’re frozen in place, now fully awake. You obviously could tell he was big and buff, but seeing him shirtless, even if it was just for a second, is completely different territory. He pays no mind to you and keeps walking.
A group of voices coming from the dining room take you out of your trance and remind you what you were doing. “I need a drink.”
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DAY TWO
You’re not sure what you did yesterday after dinner. One drink turned into shots with Jihyun, and then everyone was drunk, playing some stupid drinking card game. That memory is already blurry, but after that is just a void.
As soon as you open your eyes, you regret it. The sun beams brightly directly to your face, increasing the feeling of someone drilling into your skull. It’s your first full day on the beach house and you’re completely wrecked.
The only thing you want to do right now is take a pill for your headache and have a fulfilling breakfast.
There’s complete silence around the house, only the birds chirping and the waves crashing accompany you as you walk to the kitchen. Most probably everyone's in the same state as you but opting to stay in bed to sleep the hangover off.
“Oh hi, I didn’t think anyone was awake.” You really don’t mean to be mean, but Mingyu’s presence startles you. You were yearning for some alone time in the morning, peaceful and quiet, at least until the others wake up.
“Good morning, yeah I just woke up,” his drowsy voice confirms it, “I don't think anyone else is awake tho.” You only hum in response, noting that you both are too sleepy to engage is small talk.
Mingyu’s company proves not to be dreadful like you thought. Both of you mind your own business, sitting down eating breakfast and killing time with your phones in comfortable silence. It’s nice, the atmosphere isn’t awkward and there are no expectations from either of you, only two people starting the day at the same time.
“You and Jihyun seem close,” Mingyu breaks the silence and looks at you after putting his phone down.
“She’s one of my best friends,” it’s your turn to put your phone down to look at him, “she and Chan were the ones who introduced me to the rest of the group actually.”
“Yeah? How did you guys meet?”
“It’s kind of a long story,” You sound dismissive even if you don’t want to, Mingyu doesn’t strike you as someone who cares about high-school drama and you don’t want to bore him to death, “just high-school stuff.”
“Well now I’m curious,” He fixes his posture to face you properly, “I’m listening, c’mon we have all morning.”
“Okay,” you chuckle at how eager he suddenly sounds, “basically, I moved cities right before senior year and she was my first friend in my new high school. I also met Chan on my first day since he gave me the tour.” You stand up to grab both of your cups, he notices and moves his hand to give you his cup himself. His hand barely grazes yours, but the touch is electrifying. Panicked, you move away quickly, put the cups in the sink and keep going with the story.
“Me, Jihyun and three other girls formed a group, we were all best friends and would always hang out together, but it didn’t last long. Long story short, Jihyun and one of the girls had a big fight and she kinda left the group, became friends with Minghao and Chan and cut her relationship with the rest of the girls. I was the only one still talking to her, and yeah, the group started crumbling.”
“This is very high school.” Mingyu jokes and you agree.
“I told you! But it gets worse. So, this girl Hyerim, the girl Jihyun fought with, didn’t like that I was still talking to Jihyun and would always turn around at the sight of her. Just childish behavior that eventually started pissing me off, because every time she saw me talking with anyone even remotely close with Jihyun, she would get mad at me. It’s stupid I know, we were 18, and I just I thought those kinds of fights only happen in middle school, but I guess I was wrong.”
“Oh my god, are we talking about Hyerim?” Jihyun suddenly enters the kitchen, clearly just woken up.
“Mingyu wanted to know our story,” you chuckle at her disgusted face and joke, “our favorite topic.”
“She sounds very immature,” Mingyu adds to your joke, not very interested in dissing some girl he doesn’t know, just adding to the teasing.
“She was a controlling bitch you couldn’t fathom her friends having other friendships beside her, she wanted followers, not friends.” Jihyun can’t help to get angry for a moment, so you intervene.
“Yeah well, luckily I escaped her claws and you and Chan adopted me, like a stray kitten,” Your arms wrap around her shoulders, and you give her a peck on the cheek, “my saviors!”
“I think I’m gonna go back to bed, my head’s killing me.” Jihyun whispers while patting your hip and starts walking away from the kitchen, “bye guys, really nice chat.” Her sarcastic tone impossible to miss.
“We don’t really talk about it much; we can get really pissed.” Your eyes are back to Mingyu, who’s gaze never left your figure.
“I get it tho, it sounds like a really shitty situation,” weirdly enough and even if he didn’t intend to, he comforts you. Mingyu doesn’t make you feel stupid for still having feelings about a fight that took place years ago.
After a while, more people wake up and a plan is made to go to a hiking spot Gyuri found close to the house. But all morning and even during the afternoon, all you can think about is how you’ve spoken more words to Mingyu at breakfast than to all your friends in two days. How comfortable you felt alone with him, no expectations, no need to pretend to be someone you’re not, in that moment, you were just you.
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“And then he pooped! On the balcony floor!”
“No way! That’s disgusting!”
The bottle that was full an hour ago passes from Mingyu’s hand to yours, with now less than a third of the liquid left.
Avoiding Minghao proves not to be as hard as you thought, people have been sticking to their own plans during the day, everyone only being together at dinnertime and after.
Loud voices can be heard from the living room, they found a board game and made it into a drinking game; and they’ve been playing for over an hour, all while you were with Mingyu in the kitchen. You’re both sitting on the floor with your backs against the island, facing the couches where everyone else is sitting, but neither of you make any attempt to join them. Some come and go, enter the kitchen to grab a drink and go back to the living room. Chan even told the both of you to join them, but you refused at the same time. The minutes go by without realizing, just talking about whatever, and you don’t feel the need to go where everyone is, you’re not missing out on anything.
“There’s no way that actually happened!” The words barely get out of you, between the laughs and the bottle on your lips.
“I got pics let me-” Mingyu’s hand heads for his front pocket to retrieve his phone.
“No!” You push him lightly to the side and you both break into laughter, “why would you take photos of that?” It’s a genuine question to ask, but it seems that you’re both a little too drunk to focus on more than one thing at a time because he doesn’t hear you.
“Why can’t I find them?” He’s looking through his gallery, and in your drunk haze, you don’t think your actions through. You put the bottle on the floor and throw yourself over him to take his phone away from his hand. Your arm stretches as far as possible to reach for Mingyu’s cellphone while the other is placed on Mingyu’s thigh for support, and you don’t notice how dangerously close your head is to his, or how your hand is dangerously high on his thigh, but he does. You put all your core strength to use and manage to snatch his phone right out of his left hand. For a second, your surroundings become blurry, the voices are no longer background noise, it’s just you and Mingyu when you look up and his eyes on yours, faces barely inches away. You stare at each other, without blinking and with your breaths synchronized for what feels like minutes. A little smirk forms on the corner of his lips when his eyes glance at your lips for a millisecond, and you can’t take it.
“I can’t believe you have pics of a stranger's poop on your phone.” You chuckle awkwardly as you back away from him and sit on your previous position, a little sobered up. His phone is left on top of his leg, where your hand previously was.
“I didn’t actually take them, it was my friend that sent them to the group chat, if that makes it any better,” you look at each other before erupting into laughter once again, the awkward atmosphere already gone.
“It doesn’t!” You try to focus on your friends and the game they’re playing while Mingyu takes another sip from the bottle. There's silence between you for the first time in hours, the only thing you feel is his body close to yours. Your knee sits on top of his and you’re afraid that if you dare to move, he’ll realize your closeness and move away. You've known this man for two days, an objectively short amount of time to be so comfortable getting into the other’s personal space, but it doesn’t feel awkward.
“Do you think they’ll notice if we casually left to go to sleep?” His voice reaches your ears, not letting the silence get between you two and overpowering the shouting coming from the living room.
“I don’t think so,” You look at your friends carefully. There doesn’t seem to be a piece missing in the group, nothing changes without you there, even if they all like you and you like them, there’s not much to add, “maybe Chan will notice if you disappear suddenly, he keeps looking over.”
“Jihyun looks this way every now and then to look for you too.”
“They’re a very caring couple.” Just that second, both Chan and Jihyun look back to the kitchen and see you sitting on the floor, and you both crack up laughing.
You rest your head back against the island and your eyelids feel heavy. You try to fight the urge to close them, you don’t want the night to be over yet, but it’s pointless. Your eyes close almost on its own and your head falls softly to the side, against Mingyu’s shoulder.
A soft smile appears on Mingyu’s face when he feels you rest on him. Warm and giddy, he’s careful not to move much as to not wake you up, but your heavy sighs signal him that you’re fast asleep. He stays that way, watching the others play while you’re resting for a few minutes. When you move slightly in your sleep to get more comfortable his breath hitches for a second, he doesn’t really want you to wake up.
Awfully, when everyone gets tired and cleans up the living room, it’s time for the house to sleep. They notice you asleep on Mingyu’s shoulder, a few knowing looks come your way, but most importantly, Chan’s worried look alerts Mingyu. He assures Chan that you’re okay, just tired, and tells him to go to sleep, that he’ll help you to your room.
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DAY THREE
Second day in a row where you wake up feeling like the weight of the whole world is sitting on your forehead.
With your eyes still closed, you stretch your arm to the side you think you remember putting your phone at. Somehow you actually find it there and grab it to check the time, but soft knocks on your door interrupt you.
“I’m awake!” Even talking feels painful.
The door opens slightly, revealing a freshly showered Mingyu with his hair still damp and his skin shiny from the morning skincare.
“Can I come in?” It’s cute how he whispers. He most likely knows your head's killing you. Your nod gives him the okay and he comes in, like your knight in shiny armor, with an ibuprofen a glass full of cold water.
You sit up when he sinks down beside you after placing the glass and the pill on the nightstand. The warmth of his body beside yours gives you flashbacks of the night before and remind you how you fell asleep on him.
“Oh my god,” embarrassed, you cover your face with your hands, “I’m so sorry for yesterday, I swear I’m never drinking again.”
“It's okay,” Mingyu chuckles, “you didn’t bother me.”
“Really?” You move your fingers enough to uncover your eyes and side eye him, “you don’t have to lie.”
“I’m serious!” With one hand, Mingyu removes yours from your face so that you look at him properly, “we were both pretty drunk and having fun, I didn’t mind.”
“You look too good for someone who was drunk last night.” He doesn’t even have noticeable eye bags, while you’re probably as pale as a zombie and look like you slept only one hour. A smirk slowly forms on his face at your words.
“You think I look good?” He teases and makes you realize what you said exactly, but you’re not giving in that easily. Even if the blush fights to get on your cheeks and your stomach starts filling with butterflies, even if your mind questions the reasons for his teasing and your eyes linger for a second too long on his smirk.
“For someone who got shitfaced 8 hours ago, sure.” You avoid his gaze and focus on the glass on the nightstand. You forgot it was there.
Your attention is now on hydrating and taking the ibuprofen pill, but you hear him chuckle again and stop drinking, “What?”
“Nothing.” His lips form a quivering line, and you know he’s fighting for his life not to laugh. “We’re all going to the beach later,” he gets up quickly, a light chuckle escaping at your questioning face, “you better not be hangover by then!”
“You’re not funny!” You shout at him as he leaves your room.
You smile as you finish the glass of water. You really try not to ponder about why that interaction left you so giddy, why remembering his smirk makes you all mushy inside, why your stomach contracts thinking about him caring enough to bring you something for your hangover.
When you decide the leftovers of the alcohol left your system for good, you change into your bikini, grab your beach towel and head to the backyard beach to join the rest of the guys.
At first, you join the girls sunbathing, snacking and chatting calmly. There's no sight of the guys, probably doing their own thing, guy stuff. The time passes quickly, talking about university and gossiping about each other's coworkers, and its already past lunch time. You almost don’t think about the night before, falling asleep on Mingyu’s shoulder and how he seemed okay with it.
It's nice spending time with the girls, even if you don’t talk much around them, they’re funny and you end up cackling and falling onto the sand multiple times.
You’ve done a good job staying away from Minghao these past two days, but there’s so much you can do before you have to face him again. And it seems that the universe thinks you’ve reached your limit.
A shirtless Minghao, wet from swimming in the sea, comes running your way, says good morning to you and asks how you woke up so nonchalantly, like his whole presence isn't messing up your whole nervous system. He never noticed and he’ll probably never know just how much he affected you. Now, for you, it’s just awkward. Remnants of your feelings still float around, making you feel guilty anytime you’ll see him and Sami acting all coupley, like right now. After saying hi to you, Sami got up and jumped to hug and kiss him, making it almost impossible for you to ignore, but your gaze doesn’t fix on them for too long.
Behind them, Vernon and Mingyu are setting up to play beach volleyball. It's only a few meters away, not enough to see a lot of details but enough to leave you breathless. Since the morning, even if you won’t admit it, all you wanted was to see him again, but you hadn’t thought about the fact that you were at the beach, with warm temperatures and the sun shining brightly. Your stomach is doing backflips seeing his defined bare back as he’s setting up the net, a pretty mundane task, but something about how concentrated he is, in addition to the way his muscles tense, is driving you crazy inside. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if you had a fleeting crush on him for the time being, it’s not like you’re gonna see him much after anyways
Sometime during your haze, Jeonghan came up to ask if any of you girls wanted to play, you were too gone to answer, but Miyoo happily went along, and now they’re playing what seems like a friendly volleyball match, but you know it’s going to get competitive in no time. Minghao, Chan and Mingyu against Jeonghan, Vernon and Miyoo, it’s gonna get ugly.
Gyuri, Sami and Jihyun keep talking beside you, but you concentrate on the match, or you at least try to. You really try to, it’s just, he’s very distracting. The ball passes from one court to another swiftly, when one team scores, they make fun of the other and vice versa. The ball goes particularly far into Chan’s team’s court and Mingyu runs to get it, having to fall onto the sand to hit the ball from below, and it works, Minghao manages to throw it to the other team’s court, and they score.
You always thought people playing sports were as hot as they could possibly get, that’s probably why you’re basically drooling over Mingyu like he’s a full course meal and you haven’t had anything to eat in weeks.
Jihyun distracts you from your train of thought to tell you that her, Sami and Gyuri are going back inside to do something you don't get to hear. You're still a little in your head and only hum in response. You’re left alone with your thoughts. Your eyes don’t want to leave his figure, until his team ultimately wins the match thanks to points that he managed to score, and he glances at you, catching you staring, and smirks. That damn fucking smirk it’s gonna get you in trouble.
You lay down on your towel, if your eyes are not on him maybe you can get over it. Out of sight out of mind, as they say. But the peace is short-lived.
A few steps get close to you, getting sand all over your body and now a shadow blocks the sun. You open your eyes reluctantly, and you wish you never opened them in the first place.
The light is blinding, but not as much as the sight of Mingyu with his black swim shorts, sun-kissed skin, glistening from the sweat, and panting. It’s too much for you. Your eyes close instinctively and you act as if he didn’t disrupt your peace. You hear that damn chuckle, and he sprinkles more sand on you.
“You’re really annoying did you know that?” You intend to sound serious, but he’s caught up with your antics by now and just chuckles.
“Only when I’m trying to get someone’s attention.” You take a breath to try and gather strength to not jump him right there and open your eyes as you sit up. He's quick to motion with his hands for you to scoot so he can sit beside you. You roll your eyes sarcastically, but still move to the side.
“How was the game?” The way he’s sitting, propped down on his elbows, tenses his biceps perfectly, almost like he’s doing it on purpose, so you try to focus on his face as he answers your question.
“They had nothing on us,” he says smugly while looking at the loser team undo the volleyball net, “but you saw that, so why are you asking?”
“What I saw was you struggling until the very end,” his teasing doesn’t get you this time, on the outside at least, because your mind is still a mess, “good thing you managed to pull through tho!”
He nods sarcastically at your response, but something else catches his attention before he can continue teasing, “What’s their deal? Are they together?” You follow his eyes to see who he’s referring to: Vernon is running away from Miyoo who’s chasing him with one of her flip flops on her hand and shouting something along the lines of ‘don’t run away you coward’. They’re both laughing and you’re also used to it, you know their fights are not that serious.
“Vernon and Miyoo?” The hysterical laugh comes out of you before you’re able to stop it, “in Vernon’s dreams sure.” You joke but you can tell he’s seriously asking.
“Nah I think she likes him too.” Mingyu lays down after his statement, with his hands behind his head, and closes his eyes to enjoy the last rays of sunshine of the day.
“Are they that obvious? You’ve been with them for three days and you already noticed,” to you it was always obvious Vernon had a thing for Miyoo since Sami first introduced her to the group, but it’s funny that someone who doesn’t really know them also noticed.
“It’s always more obvious from the outside.” His answer catches you off guard. You only hum in response and he doesn’t press more on the subject. It leaves you thinking, were you that obvious when you liked Minghao? There were times when you felt Sami knew, but she never asked you about it, and since she and Minghao started dating you never felt those weird vibes again.
Mingyu yawns at your side and gets up, distracting you from your train of thought.
It’s beginning to get dark, bringing the temperatures down a bit, and the sunset paints the sky with a beautiful mix of oranges and pinks. It looks like a painting you’d see in an overpaid museum, and it would make that price totally worth it.
It seems you’re not the only one who noticed the pretty twilight sky, because Mingyu runs inside the house and comes back after a few minutes with a digital camera and wearing a black jacket for the cold. He walks around taking pictures of different sides of the sky, with different clouds and color patterns.
“Is that camera yours?” You prop down on your elbows to admire the sky and him, and you hear a light hum coming from him as an answer, “Didn’t know you were into photography.”
“I wouldn’t say I'm into photography, I just like taking pictures of what I find pretty,” once he’s done taking pictures of the sky, he returns to his place beside you, “one of these days I want to wake up before the sun rises and just sit here, watching the stars disappear as the sun gets higher and higher.”
“It’ll probably be really peaceful,” even if you’re alone at the beach now, you can still hear people talking from inside the house, probably deciding what to have for dinner. You imagine sitting on the quiet beach at 6 am, the only sound being the crashing waves and a few morning birds, the sky beginning to light up as the sun slowly rises and the morning wind ruffling your hair. “But the first step is to not get wasted the night before.”
“Or we could just stay awake and go to sleep after.”
“We? Who says I'm doing it with you?” You joke, of course you’ll accompany him if he asked.
A sudden cold wind makes you shiver and Mingyu notices, so he takes his jacket off and gestures for you to take it. You take it silently without much resistance and notice he also put on a sleeveless t-shirt before. The jacket looks giant on you when you put it on. You zip it up, so the cold doesn’t make its way inside, and you’re embraced by his scent in no time. You smile at him, and he returns it before answering your previous question.
“I’d just annoy you until you’re awake and you’d have no choice other than to come with me.” You chuckle at his response; you wish you could see what happens inside his mind.
“And I'd punch you for interrupting my holy sleep time.” You’re still laughing when you see a flash from the corner of your eye, “did you just take a picture of me?” Mingyu shrugs with an amused look on his face and waits for the picture to load, “I probably look disgusting! Let me see.” You try and stretch to take a glance at his camera roll, but he turns it off before you can see anything.
“Why would you look disgusting?”
“I don’t know,” he has some kind of power to always surprise you with what he says, “I've been out here all day, I didn’t get the chance to check myself on the mirror.”
“I told you I only take photos of pretty things.” This time you can’t hide the blush that creeps up to your cheeks at his words. No one ever complimented you so directly, and it’s not like you’re new to flirting, but you’ve never quite felt like this. Maybe it’s because everything around you feels so dull, except for when you’re with him. When you’re around anyone else, you never feel the need to speak up, afraid they’ll don’t care or just straight up ignore you, but these past few days, when you spoke to him, you felt like he wouldn’t judge you, he paid attention, joked with you, and even chose to spend time with you when he could’ve been with anyone else. He's just easy to be with. It's tempting to want to spend every day with him, but also terrifying, because everything could change after the trip is over.
“Then let me see?” You try your luck one more time to see the pic, also to try and turn the conversation another way so he doesn’t catch on to the effect he has on you, although it’s already too late.
“Don’t you trust me?” He looks at you with puppy eyes and a pout that could make anyone melt in an instant.
“Stop doing that!” You hit him lightly on his left arm.
“Doing what?” He replies, feigning innocence.
“You know what you’re doing.” Your look is serious, but he's amused by your reaction.
“And I think it’s working.” His eyes don’t leave yours, starting a staring contest between the two. None of you want to give up, raising your eyebrows to tease the other and titling your head to the side, but you don’t bulge and neither does he. You try to figure out the workings of his brain, if he feels the same things you do. You embarrassingly want to think that he does.
“Can I-”
“Guys!” Sami’s voice interrupts you and both you and Mingyu stop staring at each other to look at her, “Dinner is ready! Come inside!”
Only at her words do you realize the sun already fully set and the sky is painted a dark blue color, with the only thing visible being the moon and a few stars.
“W-we should get back inside.” You look back at Mingyu to find him already staring at you.
“What were you gonna say?” He stops you before you can get any farther.
“Oh, it’s nothing, c’mon they’re waiting for us.”
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DAY FOUR
“And then she ghosted me! The nerve!” Gyuri finishes telling her story about a girl she hooked up with last month.
“But didn’t you just say you didn’t really wanna be with her? I don’t get it.” Jihyun asks what all of you were thinking.
“Yeah, but like, I don’t want to be the ghosted one!” You, Sami and Jihyun burst into laughter at her words.
You and the girls are sitting on the living room while the guys and Miyoo are outside playing a rematch from yesterday’s game of beach volleyball. As soon as everyone finished eating dinner, Miyoo demanded a rematch and everyone, with their competitive souls, agreed immediately. It’s already dark outside, but with the back lights on it’s possible to play, at least for a while before your eyes get tired.
The four of you ended up sitting around the coffee table, talking about relationship drama or just telling funny stories. You don’t have much to add to the conversation, so you just say a comment or joke from time to time and give your opinion when asked. That’s until you’re given the spotlight.
“So, Y/N,” Gyuri catches you off guard and you look at her confused, “what’s up with you and Mingyu?”
“That’s right! I see you together a lot these days,” Sami adds excitedly. Three pairs of eyes are now watching you closely, curious for your answer.
“Oh nothing…I don’t know.” You shy away when a little smile cracks at your lips, hugging your knees close as you glance at the beach to see if you can spot Mingyu, but all you see is a blur due to the poor lighting, “we just happen to end up together a lot I think.” It is partially true because it’s not like you actively searched for him.
“C’mon! Don’t you think he’s hot?” Gyuri’s so forward she just makes you laugh, “If I wasn’t a lesbian lemme tell you, the things I would do.”
“Gyuri oh my god! He's right there, have some decency,” Sami brings her back to earth.
“Right, sorry sorry,” she apologizes and takes a sip of her beer before speaking to you again, “but really, you should do something!”
“Like what? I don’t know guys maybe he’s not interested.” Do you want him to be?
“I saw you two at the beach yesterday and trust me, he is.” Sami puts her hand on your shoulder to make you look at her and tries to encourage you, with no bad intentions whatsoever, she just wants to see you happy, you know that.
His words from the night before echo in your head, ‘it’s always more obvious from the outside', but you don’t really want to talk about it out loud, afraid you’ll jinx it. Jihyun throws you a knowing look and opens her mouth, but she gets interrupted before she can outer a word.
“Guys! Guess what-” Chan suddenly enters the house and the four of you shut up instantly, guilty look on your faces, “Wow what were you talking about? Am I not allowed to hear it?”
“It’s girl stuff!” Jihyun doesn’t hide that he is in fact, not allowed to hear your conversation, and throws a pillow his way, but he doesn't budge, “What do you want?”
“What I was going to say was... we beat them!” You chuckle and the four of you applaud lightly.
“That’s great babe!”
“You should’ve seen them when we-” Chan comes inside to show off their win when gets interrupted by a sudden darkness. The power went out, and everything and everyone sits in silence for about two seconds before Jeonghan comes in.
“How does everyone feel about turning on the fireplace?”
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Lighting the fireplace on turned out to be a great idea. It’s been hours and the power is still out. All ten of you are sitting on the couches and on the floor, surrounding the only source of light and warmth, and drinking the beer that’s left from the previous days before it loses its gas.
It’s warm and cozy, and everyone is engaged in different conversations with the people by their side. You listen as Jeonghan talks about his new job at a museum, trying to pay attention, but it’s really difficult when, from the corner of your eye, you can see Mingyu and Minghao talking comfortably. It’s weird, seeing the guy that caused you so many emotional breakdowns over the past year talking with the only guy who was able to make you forget about it. Even if every day that passes you feel yourself getting more and more over him, there’s this little voice on the back of your brain reminding you how you stupidly thought you might’ve had a chance with him.
Someone by your side shifts and you see Jeonghan’s expression change before he exclaims, “No touchy coupley things when we’re all around!” Everyone’s eyes are now on the couple behind you. Jihyun just sat on Chan’s legs and they're just hugging, but Jeonghan’s low-key right, most of you are single and it looks like they're rubbing it on your faces (even if it’s not what they want).
“You’re just jealous because you’re lonely and sad,” Jihyun rebuttals and everyone huffs. It’s normal for them to bicker like this so you just watch like it’s a comedy show.
“I’m single by choice, I’m not letting anyone tie me down.” Jeonghan replies proudly.
“Didn’t you go out with that girl for the whole winter? What was her name... Miyeon? Or what about Seungcheol last year?”
“Well, I’m all free now so”
“Then don’t come to me asking for tips on what to say to girls ever again,” this is the kind of burn that makes Gyuri start clapping like crazy.
“I’m sure everyone gets what I mean,” Jeonghan looks around, checking to see if anyone agrees with him. Even if it's quite dark, you can see a few heads nod in agreement, including yours.
“Oh c’mon! Doesn’t anyone here like someone?” Now Jihyun is the one looking for backup, but it’s something harder to admit, “if you like someone, then you know you want to be close to them, to touch them!” She makes eye contact with you, knowing you do understand her, because she was the only one you told about Minghao, because you used to tell her everything.
“No one?” She asks again, looking at everyone one by one, but no one comes forward. And she lastly looks at you again. You shake your head as panic starts invading you, fearing everyone will notice why you, what she means. You make eye contact with her probably for less than a second, but it feels like your whole life passes in front of your eyes.
“Ok, fair enough.” The tense climate stills the air, because even if Jihyun agreed to minimize the public displays of affection, her speech got to some of you, and it takes a few minutes for everything to go back to normal.
But you’re still anxious. You never discussed what happened with Minghao after you found out he was seeing Sami, you couldn’t. Her indirectly letting you know she remembers makes you feel seen, exposed, bare, like she just disclosed your deepest secret to the whole world, like everyone now knows the most pathetic thing about you.
Eventually the atmosphere starts getting full of laughs and different voices again, but you’re still in your head, so much so that you almost don’t notice the power is back on.
As everyone is celebrating, you get up and announce quietly that you’re going to call it a night. Throwing some lame excuse, but no one really bats an eye, they just say goodnight and go back to their conversations. Everyone except for one person.
Mingyu, who’s been keeping an eye on you the whole night, and who’s already accustomed to your shyness, noticed that you got more reserved after Jihyun’s speech, but didn’t want to ask you anything that would make you uncomfortable in front on everyone. So, when you rapidly escape to go back to your room, he takes the opportunity to leave as well, putting the same excuse you did about being tired and not wanting to wake up super hangover again.
As you’re in tucked in bed, about to burst out crying in any second, Mingyu knocks softly on your door.
You don’t answer, staying as still as possible, trying to stop your sobs so nothing can be heard from outside. It’s been a few minutes since you left, so maybe it’s believable that you’re already asleep.
“Are you alright?” Hearing Mingyu’s voice shatters you and the tears and sobs become impossible to stop.
“Yeah, everything’s fine!” You wouldn’t believe you if you were him.
“You’re not fine.” He sounds actually worried
“How would you know? Just leave me alone!” Your voice breaks at the last words, telling Mingyu everything he needs to know
“I can’t just leave if I know you’re crying."
“Yes, you can! Just go!"
“You’re not getting rid of me that easily.” A playful tone mixes in his voice, “You can talk to me.” You know, but this is different. This is exposing something to him that makes you feel pathetic, idiotic, and it's much more than you ever told anyone
There’s silence while you consider letting him in. He’s not a stranger but he’s oblivious enough to the situation that he wouldn’t care about the drama, maybe you can trust him not to tell anyone. He cared enough to come and check on you, it’s way more than what anyone else did.
Mingyu waits for you, worried about what could’ve caused you to leave so suddenly and start crying alone in your room.
“I’ll be in my room if you need anyth-" He was about to give up when you open your door just barely, as to not let the corridor light reveal your blotched, tear-stained face. But you don’t stay there, you run back to the bed as he figures out that you’re letting him in.
He enters your room carefully, slowly stepping in and closing the door behind him. Even with the lights off, he sees you sitting on your bed, legs crossed and back against the wall while you’re fidgeting with your fingers, avoiding his eyes. Before he says anything, he sits beside you on the bed, testing what you’re comfortable with. When he’s sure you’re not going to tell him to fuck off, you finally hear his voice.
“What’s wrong?” He experimentally puts one hand on your knee, trying to comfort you, but it ultimately makes you sob a little before you reply.
“You have to promise not to make fun of me.” You’re still avoiding looking at him, entranced looking at his hand, but when he doesn’t answer you for a few seconds, you look to the side to meet his eyes, and only then he notices how serious your request is.
“I’d never make fun of you, or what made you sad like this.” He fixes his posture, sitting back against the wall like you and legs stretched on the bed, “If you’re comfortable you can tell me, but if you’re not I can at least try and make you feel better, take your mind somewhere else, whatever you need.”
You feel stupid. Crying about something that happened months ago, about a guy that isn’t really worth your time, when in front of you have this perfect man that for two days has made you feel more comfortable than anyone has ever. Sure, you don’t know if he just does this for all his friends, if you can even call this a friendship, but at least he cares. In this moment, you feel you could tell him anything, your deepest secrets, and he would welcome it with open arms. You'd do the same for him.
“You also can’t tell anyone,” You rush to add, “like not even Chan, okay?” Mingyu nods, a little smile showing up at his face as he realizes you’re really trusting him, “I promise.”
And you do. You open up to him, trusting him with what you have been carrying on your back these past few months that you didn’t trust no one else with.
You tell him how you always liked Minghao. How you found out you actually went to the same middle school but didn’t know each other. And how you thought he liked you back. How you don’t even like to talk about people you fancy, but you trusted Jihyun with it, before she distanced from your group and from you. How she suddenly became close with Minghao and his friends. How every time you managed to be with Jihyun alone, she would show off that she talked on the phone with him every day, that she regularly crashed at his place after work, that he often paid for her meals. She obviously had started liking him too, and it killed you inside. You couldn’t talk to her because his name would always come up somehow. A few weeks pass, you fight with your friends, and Jihyun and her new group welcome you in. They start inviting you to their hangouts, to their houses (often Chan’s). You always felt a little bit out of place, even if Chan and Jihyun always tried to invite you, and even if they always made sure to engage with you in conversations. But you were happy, you had a group of friends you saw every week, who made you laugh if you were going through rough times, and you got to spend time with the guy you liked. It wasn’t perfect, but it was good, until it wasn’t.
And after you finished senior year, the group was still intact. Hanging out whenever everyone could and talking on the group chat constantly. Except, you saw Minghao more often because you got into the same college, and even though you were on different majors, you still managed to bump into each other. One Friday, long after, everyone managed to get free to see each other after so long, you all went to some bar and you didn’t realize how late it got, so Minghao, being that he lived close to you, offered to take you home. Things happened and you ended up sleeping together. He was your first, God how pathetic is that, and it just solidified how much you liked him, and you thought it meant something for him too. But nothing changed after that, you two never talked about it and he just pretended nothing happened. And you didn’t tell anyone about it.
Months later, on Chan’s birthday, people started telling inside jokes that you didn’t understand about Sami and Minghao, teasing them to no end until they both turned red. When you looked at Gyuri for context, she whispered that they’ve been on numerous dates in the last few months. Your heart dropped, you had to pretend that everything was fine for the rest of the night, but as soon as you got home, you started crying and overthinking. If this was going on for months, were they already something when he slept with you? Did that solidify to him that he liked Sami? All the times you thought maybe Minghao was flirting with you were probably just your mind fucking with you, or the worst cascenario, he was flirting with the both of you until he decided which one he liked best. You felt stupid, pathetic, but most of all you felt betrayed. Because everyone knew, including Jihyun. And all this time you geeked to her about every interaction with Minghao, telling her every detail, she knew he was seeing someone else. Sure, your relationship had changed, she had new best friends, and she probably didn’t want to disclose something about Sami’s personal life, but letting you delude yourself was just mean.
Days passed, and a new secret was revealed to you, that Jihyun and Chan started dating. This just enforced what you thought that she just didn’t trust you anymore, you weren’t as much of a part of her life as before. You never talked about Minghao with her again, the last time she asked you about him was the same day you found out her and Chan were dating, almost half a year ago. But the topic ended there, and it was never brought up again, until tonight.
“So, earlier when she talked about liking someone and she looked directly at me,” you breathe for the first time in at least half an hour that you’ve been talking to Mingyu nonstop, “she was referring to me liking him, and I felt so exposed, her looking at me right in the eye trying to make me confess to liking someone just so she can win an argument, it felt like I was naked and at her mercy in front of everyone.” You feel like a huge weight was lifted from your shoulders.
You can still feel tears rolling down your face. Sometime during your talk, Mingyu put his arm around you, and you rested your head on his shoulder. You’re sure his sweatshirt must be damp with tears now.
He doesn’t say anything for a while, letting you calm down and stabilizing your breathing. You concentrate on his breathing and his fingers drawing circles on your shoulder.
“Thank you.” You finally speak up after a few minutes of silence.
“For what?”
“For listening,” you answer like it’s an obvious thing, “it was a lot, and you didn’t have to, but you listened anyway.”
“Of course, and I asked, didn’t I?” You chuckle lightly. He has a way of making everything easier.
“So, what do you think?”
“Do you really want my opinion?”
“I asked, didn’t I?” You copy what he said before and he chuckles.
“I think you should tell them how you feel.” You don’t look at him, but you can feel his eyes on you, as if analyzing how you respond to what he said. “They’re your friends after all, they’ll understand.”
“I've thought about it, I’m not very good at that kind of talks, I kinda just keep it to myself until I get over it.”
“I don’t mean to be harsh, but it doesn’t seem to be working.” It’s hard hearing that, but it’s true. You’ve been carrying this for years and you’re still crying over it.
“Wow,” he’s not trying to be mean, but it really left you speechless, “maybe I should… to get it off my chest at least.”
“You don’t have to, but maybe you’ll get some closure with Jihyun that way, that’s the only way she’ll know she’s making you upset.”
“No, you’re right, I’ll talk to her,” when? You don’t know, “but only her, talking with Minghao kind of scares me, what if he forgot?”
“Don’t tell anyone but,” he starts, and you smile at his silliness, “I never really liked Minghao in the first place, I don’t know why, but now I have a reason.” You can’t help to laugh.
“You don’t have to dislike him just because of what I told you, you should get to know him!” You don’t resent Minghao for what happened, and he’s still someone you can call a friend, regardless of your history.
You dare to look up at Mingyu from his shoulder, and your face is much closer to his than you thought. It’s dark in your room, only the moonlight providing you with enough light for you to see how his head turns slowly to meet yours, and his eyes encountering yours, like he knew you were staring at him.
“He’s an ass for what he did to you, and I don’t want to be friends with someone like that.” He speaks softly, almost in a whisper, but with such a serious tone that it gives you goosebumps. Your eyes can’t seem to leave his, and neither of you want to stop. It’s becoming a habit of you two to stare at each other, testing who’ll look away first. His breath fans over your face, and you think about his words. You knew Mingyu was a good listener, he proved it several times over the span of four days, but now he’s even taking what you said into consideration before establishing a friendship with someone? Sure, he already didn’t really like Minghao, or so he said, but you gave him a reason to, so he must believe and trust you enough to truly take it into account.
This time, Mingyu breaks the silence first, “Let’s go watch the sunrise tomorrow,” but he doesn’t break the eye contact. You swear you see a little spark in his eyes at his words, and it makes impossible for you to say no.
“You really want me to go with you?” You just want confirmation that he does, that he’s not taking pity in you after crying your eyes out in front of him.
“It’ll be sad if I go alone, and besides, you’re the one I like the most here,” and it’s like a thousand butterflies fly out of their cocoon simultaneously inside your stomach, “don’t tell Chan I said that.” You both laugh at his words.
“We should go to sleep then, what time does the sun come out? Like 5:30 am?” You groan while saying the last words. You were never a morning person.
Cold hits you all around when Mingyu takes his arm off your shoulders and gets off your bed. You almost want to ask him to stay the night here so you can wake up together. But you don’t.
“I’ll come and wake you up, but don’t punch me please,” he jokes about what you said the day before and you chuckle. “Good night, see you in a few hours,” he says as he walks to your door slowly, hoping you’d ask him to stay. But you don’t, and he doesn’t say anything either.
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DAY FIVE
Waking up so early in the morning isn’t difficult. You barely got any sleep; you spent the whole time watching the ceiling overthinking about everything that happened. You even heard Mingyu’s alarm in the distance, so when he knocked to wake you up, you were already ready.
The sky is starting to show more colors as the minutes pass. You’re sitting on a mat at the beach while Mingyu’s inside making coffee for the both of you. Is it wrong to think that there may be something more to your friendship with Mingyu? You’re almost certain you’re starting to like him, and these moments you’ve been having together don’t do anything to suppress your bubbling feelings. It’s dangerous, and you don’t want to let it go too far, not again.
You hear his steps behind you before you see him. He hands you the coffee in silence and you thank him with a smile. You’re both slowly sipping away your coffee admiring the colors of the sky as they become more alive the more the sun comes out. The soft morning breeze gives you chills, but the warm cup in your hand eases it away, and the waves crashing provide with enough background noise for it to not be completely silent. But being quiet with him hasn’t been uncomfortable, you don’t feel the need to fill the void, you’re just two people enjoying each other’s company.
As the sky turns orange and pink, with swirling clouds making it look like a painting, Mingyu takes his camera out and takes photos beside you. You watch him as he does his thing, changing the settings of the camera and picking different angles, mesmerized, and you don’t notice he says something to you.
“Sorry?” You come back to earth and find him looking at you already.
“I said I’m glad we did this,” his smile almost outshines the sun.
“Me too.” You smile back, afraid to show just how you really like to be with him, afraid to scare him away.
“You’re the first person that doesn’t think I’m weird for wanting to do this you know?” He mutters after he puts down the camera, “people always tell me it’s too much of a sacrifice.”
“That’s so stupid!” You huff, incredulous look on your face, “I get not wanting to wake up early on vacation but like, a sacrifice? That’s so dramatic.”
“You get it! Thank you.”
It’s quiet for a little while after. Every few minutes a new shade of orange paints the sky and Mingyu points his camera up to take more pictures. He probably took a thousand pictures already but shows no sign of stopping. You opt for laying down, the little sleepiness you felt already slipped away, and you’re left with your thoughts until Mingyu lays down too.
“I wish we could freeze time and just stay here like this.” You prefer being here alone with him than inside the house getting overwhelmed by everything. Here, it’s much peaceful, comfortable.
“That would be nice wouldn’t it.”
The sun is fully out by now, the birds already started singing on the background, and you can hear cars on the distance. The day officially started, you’re no longer on the limbo in between yesterday and tomorrow.
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After everyone wakes up and has breakfast together, you and Mingyu take a quick nap before lunch time. Eventually the lack of sleep got to both of you, and you weren’t even able to keep a conversation going.
The house is suspiciously silent when you wake up, it’s probably 3 or 4 pm but no one seems to be at the house. Except for the one person you encounter when you go out to the porch for some air.
“Hey! You're finally awake!” Jihyun greets you with excitement, too oblivious about what happened the day before, “that was some nap!” Maybe you should really tell her, she has the right to know if you’re mad or upset at her. It's not like she forgot about what you’ve told her, you just have to let her know how that makes you feel. It’s easy!
“I think I passed out as soon as my head hit the pillow, I must’ve been too tired.” It comes out a little colder than you intended, hopefully she’ll mistake it by sleepiness.
“Were you okay yesterday? You went to bed so suddenly.” Now’s the time, you can’t just lie now, if you don’t tell her now then it’s pointless.
“Actually, I wanted to talk to you about that.” You go to the point straight away and she notices your serious tone.
“Is everything okay?” There’s a little voice in your head telling you she’s not actually worried, but right now you decide not to believe it
“It’s about what you said yesterday, I wanted to ask you...” your hands shake as you lean against the rail by her side, looking at the beach, not so peaceful like in the morning now, and you turn your head to look at her, “it may be stupid but, were you like, indirectly asking me if I still like Minghao?” You do feel stupid as the words leave your mouth.
“Oh, I don’t really remember why I did that, I was kinda drunk and saying stupid shit,” you relax a little, at least she wasn’t trying to put you on the spotlight on purpose, “but maybe? I mean you never talked about him again.”
“I just thought it was awkward, since I became friends with everyone.” The conversation isn’t really going anywhere. You could leave it like this, but the topic out in the open and it could be the only chance to get answers, “and with you also liking him and all that.”
“I-I didn’t, I mean-” she stutters, and suddenly dropping the bomb that you know more information than she gave to you in the first place doesn’t feel right.
“It’s okay, well no it’s not really, you should’ve told me, but I’m past it by now.” Jihyun visibly relaxes at your words, but the air starts getting thicker, the atmosphere awkward.
“You’re right I should’ve told you, I’m sorry,” she avoids your eyes. You’re looking right at her, but she keeps her eyes on the ocean, or the sand, or literally anywhere else. “It was just a silly crush, it didn’t mean anything.”
“I don’t think it was, but it’s fine.” How can she just brush it off so easily?
“Actually, you don’t know how it was,” suddenly now she’s capable of facing you, and her eyes are almost on fire, “we weren’t even friends by then, so you don’t know what it was like.”
“Why are you saying that like it’s my fault?” Anger starts to take over your brain, “and we were definitely still friends.”
“It just wasn’t the same and you know it.”
"You were the one who pushed me aside!”
“I pushed you aside? I welcomed you! When you were alone! I invited you to every hangout, every party, I invited you everywhere!”
“You stopped trusting me.” There’s a noticeable hurt in your voice, “you didn’t even tell me when you started to like Chan.”
“You were too busy feeling sorry for yourself that you didn’t notice, even Vernon noticed, and he has zero awareness of what happens around him.”
“Because my best friend liked the same guy as me and didn’t even tell me!”
“I just couldn’t tell you.”
“Yes, you could’ve! and I really still wanted to be friends with you, at least I thought we still were.” Flashbacks of times your other friends told you how you should stop taking to her come to your mind. “And you did tell me,” Jihyun looks confused at your statement, “maybe not directly, but every time you decided I was good enough to have alone time with, and knowing just how much I liked Minghao, the only thing you ever talked about was him, and how smart he was, or how funny he was, or how he let you have his jacket, it was pretty obvious.”
Jihyun freezes in place. She looks down again and red stains start appearing on her cheeks.
“So yeah, I didn’t exactly want to talk about him with you.” This really isn’t turning out the way you thought it would.
“I- I didn’t realize,” you barely hear her whisper, “I wasn’t doing it on purpose.”
“Did you also just didn’t realize that it would’ve been nice to tell me that they were going out?” Their names aren’t said out loud, but Jihyun knows what you’re talking about, “I had to found out myself, and everyone knew except for me, stupid old me who was obliviously still hung up on him.”
“I’m sorry,” if you weren’t so angry, maybe you’d take pity on her and stop arguing, but at this moment, it just makes you madder.
“Do you know how horrible it is to see the girl who used to give you insecurities and the guy you’ve liked for years be together? Or how hard it is not to cry in that moment? Surrounded by other people who don’t know how you feel, while the only person who did know just ignores you?” Tears start blurring your vision, but you don’t let them fall, you can’t, “luckily I don’t like him anymore, but the guilt is killing me.”
“She asked me not to tell anyone, they weren’t serious at first.”
“You could’ve just told me beforehand that he was seeing someone, you didn’t have to tell me who it was.”
“I’m sorry, I really am.” Jihyun looks at you in the eyes for the first time in minutes, her eyes also glittery with tears.
“And yesterday, I felt so exposed, like you only wanted me to confess so you could win a stupid argument, like my feelings didn’t matter at all.”
“I really wasn’t trying to do that, I’m serious.”
“It doesn’t matter what you wanted or didn’t want to do, that’s how it made me feel.”
“I’m sorry.” The front door opens on the other side of the house and a chorus of voices reaches your ears. What a time to have a full house again.
You both look inside at the first sound, and you can feel her eyes on you again a second after, but you can’t turn your head, you can’t look at her, not right now. Without looking back, your feet walk you off to the beach, maybe with a load off your shoulders, but a little more broken than before.
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A walk alone might just be what you need. Tears don’t fall, the wind blowing them off before they can. By the time you come back, you find someone else alone on the porch, and it’s almost like the universe wants you to suffer today.
Minghao stands in the same place you were before, with his body resting on the rail and looking at the ocean. He sees you at the distance and waves, but you can only find the energy to give him half a smile.
It’s impossible to ignore him now, so you walk over to him and stand by his side in silence. But that doesn’t last long. Something in you seems to want to let go today, free you from everything you’ve been holding inside for so long. At this moment, revealing to him how you felt seems like the best option, and you don’t argue with your brain about it.
“I’m gonna tell you something,” your words catch his attention, and he turns his head to you, but you stay still looking ahead, “but you don’t have to say anything back, it’s just so I can let it go, okay?”
Minghao nods slowly, confused by your words but listening, nevertheless.
“I used to really like you, you know,” your gaze catches his for a second before going back, “I don’t anymore, but yeah, I just wanted to get it off my chest.”
His mouth opens, as if he’s about to say something, but nothing comes out. His silence doesn’t scare you like you thought it would, “I didn’t mean to freak you out, and I don’t expect you to say anything.”
“I just… I didn’t know,” he sounds apologetic as he replies. Maybe it’s better that he didn’t know, it would be embarrassing if he or anyone else knew.
“We never talked about what happened between us,” it pains you to remember, but now you have to finish what you started, “but it meant something to me, I know for you it was probably nothing, because you started seeing Sami right after, and don’t get me wrong you two are perfect together I’m not trying to interfere, but yeah, it really hurt me that you just pretended that everything was normal after.” You finish with a sigh of relief. Everything you’ve been holding onto is now out in the open, and you’ve never felt so relieved, like you could finally breathe.
“I was an ass,” his statement is surprising, “I don’t have any excuse for what I did, I was an ass and I’m sorry.”
“Yeah, you were,” you joke as you turn around, and he chuckles. You catch a glimpse of the living room through the window and see Mingyu sitting on the couch with Chan and Jeonghan. The three are paying attention to Vernon, who’s standing up telling a story, making dramatic movements with his arms.
“Are you okay?” Minghao asks and catches your attention again.
“I had a fight with Jihyun,” you don’t want to tell him, and you hope he doesn’t ask about it further, “I don’t really want to talk about it.”
“Okay,” it’s a little awkward, but there’s nothing you can do now. You told him what you had to, and he apologized, “I’m gonna go inside then, is everything okay between us?” he’s almost at the door when he asks.
“Definitely, and sorry I dumped all of that out of nowhere.”
“You don’t have to be sorry.” With that, he finally goes in and joins the guys on the couch.
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After dinner’s over and everyone moved from the dining room and onto the couches, you’re left alone picking everything up and doing the dishes. After three days of cooking every meal, you collectively chose to order from a local restaurant instead, so luckily there's not much to clean.
Dinner was awkward as it has never been. Jihyun couldn’t look you in the eyes, even if she tried to act as if nothing happened. And not a word came out of your mouth, besides when you offered to do the dishes. No one else probably noticed the weird energy in the room, but to you it was suffocating.
As you’re putting the glasses on the sink, Mingyu re-enters the room. You try not to pay too much attention to him as he walks over to you, even if your skin tingles every time he’s around.
“Do you wanna go for a walk around town?” He has to crouch down to whisper in your ear.
“Right now? I promised to do the dishes.” The idea excites you for sure, the house has been weighing you down all day and also spending time alone with Mingyu is an activity you’re starting to love these days. But you also fear what everyone might say if you leave out of nowhere.
“We’ll get someone else to do it.” You’re not usually this easy to convince, but for him it’s suddenly too easy.
“Fine, but you do the talking.” He chuckles as he motions for you to follow him.
His back is hypnotizing as you walk behind him. His hair is damp from the quick shower he went to take right after he finished his plate. The woody smell of his cologne reaches you strongly, and you fear it may become your favorite smell ever.
You manage to get past everyone that’s lounging on the living room without getting noticed, but as Mingyu’s about to open the front door, Chan comes out of the bathroom and bumps into you, questioning look on his face. Before he can ask anything, Mingyu tells him that you two will go out and to please do the dishes. His brows don’t stop frowning, but in the end, he lets you go out, agreeing with a groan.
It's the first time you’ve been out of the house for the last few days. The few supply runs that were done you didn’t go, and the beach is kind of a part of the house, so it doesn’t count. The fresh night air hits you when you step on the street, and with Mingyu by your side, you no longer feel suffocated, you can finally breathe.
When Mingyu starts walking in one direction, you follow him. Since him, Chan and their family have been coming here every summer for their entire lives, he knows the town pretty well and you trust him to guide you.
You walk around the streets for a while, talking about trivial things, telling each other anecdotes and joking around, getting to know each other more than you were able the past few days. Because even if you spent quite some time together, it was always situational, but right now, alone with no one you know around, it’s much easier to let go.
The town feels cozy and warm, like the hometown from a Christmas movie. It’s very quiet and you don’t encounter many people, only the occasional old couple that goes out for a walk or few people walking their dogs.
“How come I’ve never met you before? I went to your house multiple times,” you ask when you decide to sit down at a park.
Such a strong presence like his is hard to ignore, but somehow, after all these years of being friends with his brother, you only heard about him, never met. Your friends would talk about him from time to time, and you were always itching to meet him, but it was like he was never there.
“I let Chan have his space when he has people over,” he shrugs as if it’s the most normal thing, but it’s something that’s been plaguing your head ever since you were introduced.
“But you've met the others?”
“They're at our house a lot, a little more than I'd like if I'm being honest,” you both chuckle at his statement
“Yeah, they can be a little annoying and loud but that’s why I like them, they can take your mind off other things.” A lot of times, when you were having a rough day or you were sad about something, having fun with them would make you forget about everything. Focusing on a stupid cooking competition Gyuri made up or playing a new card game Jeonghan discovered, those would become your favorite days.
“I know you said you don’t really like Minghao for some reason, but what about the rest? Don't you like them?” You’ve seen him talk with everyone by now, so you’re just curious.
“Is it bad that I don’t care about them enough? To have an opinion on them I mean, they're just my brother's friends.”
“Are you saying you don’t have an opinion about me?” Deep down you really want to know what he thinks about you, why he seems to want to spend time with you out of all the others.
“I'd like to think you’re not just my brother’s friend by now.” That could mean a lot of things, but it doesn’t stop your stomach from contracting and a smile from appearing on your face.
“That does not answer my question!” You push him lightly to the side, so he doesn’t see the tiniest blush creeping up your cheeks.
“I already told you I like you the most out of everyone at the house.” He keeps finding the words to make your mind collapse and saying them so nonchalantly.
“You only said that to make me feel better because I was crying.”
“I mean it,” the poor lighting at the park doesn’t prevent you from seeing the truthfulness in Mingyu’s eyes, “I wouldn’t have asked you to come out here with me if I didn’t.”
“That’s good.” You respond through a smile, and you see his smile form in his eyes before the rest of his face joins.
“Why?”
“You might be becoming my favorite too.” The confession shocks you as it leaves your mouth, and you regret it instantly. But when you see him getting shy, and even detect a little blush on his ears, it becomes worth it. “Should we get back? It’s getting really late.”
The walk back is just as calm and comforting as before. But the difference is you’re much more aware of Mingyu by your side. How his hand slightly brushes yours every now and then, sparking electricity that runs through your veins and birthing just a tiny bit of hope that he’ll connect them for once. How your steps coordinate even if his legs are much longer than yours. You don’t care if your being quiet, not with him.
“I have seen you around at my house, I just never went over and said hi,” he confesses after a few minutes, “I really should’ve, we could’ve met sooner.” There’s a tone of regret in his voice and his eyes shine at the possibility.
“You’d like that?” His words warm up your insides and you can’t resist the smile that breaks on your face as you look at him.
“Yeah,” his eyes shine as they meet yours, entranced, “I feel like an asshole, Chan always invited me to hang out with you guys when I was home, but I always refused, I don't know why.”
“I get it,” you both look at the empty road ahead, breaking the eye contact before you trip and fall, “I probably would’ve done the same.”
“Eventually I met everyone, except for you.”
“Maybe we were meant to meet this way,” your statement makes him look at you with curiosity, “like maybe if we met before you wouldn’t have spared me a second thought and you wouldn’t have asked me to ride with you on the way here.”
“You believe in destiny and that stuff?” There’s no mocking tone on his voice, but you’re still careful with your answer.
“Something like that, more like the universe prepares us for our future, like we go through things for a reason,” you feel a little stupid talking about it out loud, but Mingyu won’t judge you, “I try to see the good in the bad, is it silly?”
“I do believe in destiny, so if it’s silly then I’m fucked too,” his joke takes a laugh out of you and your eyes connect again, “you look really pretty when you smile.”
“Oh, shut up!” You avoid his eyes by looking down, but your red stained cheeks reveal his effect on you. Why is he saying all of these things all of the sudden? The talk about wishing to meet sooner and destiny already had your stomach filled with butterflies, but his sudden flirting makes your insides want to explode.
“Missed it today,” you look up slowly at his words, “you looked down at dinner earlier, did something happen?”
“I impulsively talked with Jihyun, and it didn’t end well,” you start fidgeting with your fingers, embarrassed by your behavior, “she tried to apologize but, in the moment, it didn’t feel genuine to me so I kinda just stormed off.”
“At least you got to tell her what you felt,” your head tilts like you can’t believe what he’s saying, “see the good in the bad, like you said.”
“Yeah, you’re right,” you huff, but the release of all those pent-up feelings did feel relieving, “and I also talked to Minghao after all.”
“Oh yeah I saw you guys talking earlier, how did that go?” It’s disappointing to see you’re already back at the front of the house. You don’t want the night to end, you wanna keep carelessly talking with Mingyu forever.
“Better I think,” you shrug as he lets you in, “I told him that I used to like him.” He follows right behind you as you walk towards your rooms. The lights are all turned off, the silence interrupted by your steps and your voices. No one’s up beside you two. “It was awkward but at least I got it off my chest.”
“Used to? You don’t like him anymore?” Mingyu asks with curiosity. A tiny glint of hope reveals in his eyes waiting for your response.
When you think about why you liked Minghao, you can’t really think of much. Memories of times he’d remember details about you or say casual flirty things come to mind, but is that enough to like someone? Times when he straight up ignored you to go after his friends, or when he couldn’t even say hi to you when you saw each other in college always made you doubt.
“I don’t know if I ever liked him actually.”
“How so?” It’s scary to open up to someone like you’re doing with Mingyu, but for some reason you find it easy to tell him things you’ve never said out loud.
“I think I just liked the idea of a guy I found attractive liking me, even if he never actually did.” You always thought he was attractive, and when he’d say little flirty things to you your stomach your burn up. But before that started you didn’t think about him in that way. “I don’t know if it was all in my head or not.”
“Any guy would be really stupid not to like you.” He stands with his back against the wall beside his door, looking down at you with the most honesty you’ve ever seen in his eyes.
“You keep saying things like that,” confusing you, giving you hope. The wall hits you as you stand back, staring at him in the same position he is. Both beside your doors, you could end the night right now, stop this back and forth between you, but something keeps you out here, longing for him to do something.
“I mean what I say.” It feels like a challenge was laid down in front of you, but you want him to take the first step.
“I know.” He smirks at your words.
“Good.” His eyes stare so intensely, like he’s trying to read your mind, to know every thought passing through your mind. He’s usually very hypnotizing, but right now, under the moonlight, flirty haze and smirk adorning his face, you can’t look away.
Everything around you blurs as you stare at each other, waiting for the other to break the silence, to make a move, to do anything. Every second it passes the tension becomes more and more palpable, even the tiniest move might snap it. But the both of you stay static, only a faint noise of rain beginning to fall filling the silence.
Seconds feel like minutes, and every second that passes that Mingyu does nothing gets more disappointing. Maybe it was all in your head after all.
Defeated, you throw a little smile and a muffled ‘good night' at him as your hand turns your doorknob, and you finally break eye contact, entering your room slowly as his face drops.
When you close the door, you regret it instantly. You stand there, listening attentively for any noise. Is he still standing there? Maybe you should’ve done something, maybe he was also waiting for you.
There’s no noise coming from outside, and as more seconds pass, you lose hope. You don’t even breathe in case it blocks any possible noise from reaching your ears, but it’s pointless.
You take a step closer to the door and open it slightly, stupidly hoping he might be waiting for you, but the hallway’s completely empty.
Once again, you deluded yourself into thinking an attractive guy might like you, even if this time the “signs” seemed so much clearer, but it clearly didn’t mean anything. You don’t regret spending time with him though, he actually helped you a lot these past few days, it’s your fault you thought it meant something else.
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DAY SIX
After tossing and turning all night, sleeping in short periods of time while your mind over thinks instead of resting, you finally check the time and see it’s a normal hour to wake up.
You won’t admit, you kinda hoped Mingyu had texted you during the night. Your stomach contracts as you remember how he gave you his number a few days ago:
Everyone was sitting on the couches hanging out. It was early in the afternoon, but no one had really any plans. Mingyu was sitting in between you and Gyuri. They were talking about some band they both like. You grabbed your phone to google something he said, sure he got a fact wrong. When you smugly showed it to him, he huffed defeated, and grabbed your phone to read it again. But then you noticed he started typing something really fast. You looked at Gyuri by his side with a questioning look on your face, but she just raised her eyebrows teasingly after looking at what he was doing. When he returned the phone to you, it was on the contact list, a new one stood with his name on it.
Doesn’t really matter now, as you probably won’t use it after the vacation is over.
A smell of some kind of breakfast welcomes you as you open your door, someone is cooking something really yummy, but before you move forward to check who it is, Mingyu’s open door draws your attention. Judging by the time and his empty bedroom, it’s most likely he will be the one standing in the kitchen right now, and you can’t stand to face him. Not after last night. Not after you embarrassed yourself.
The sound of your stomach growling reminds you to feed it, and you remember a cute cafe you saw the night before while walking.
You manage to head out without the mystery person hearing and walk to where you remember the shop was. The sun in the sky warms up the atmosphere, you almost can’t notice the heavy rain it poured all night. As you near the cafe, you see they sell Jihyun’s favorite cupcakes. Maybe if you get her a few she’ll be unable to ignore you.
Ignoring Mingyu might be an easy task for these next few days, but Jihyun is someone you can’t ignore until the issue doesn’t bother you anymore. One of the thoughts that kept you up all night was how to fix things with her, you were both wrong, so it’s only right to approach her and talk things through again. What you didn’t expect was seeing Jihyun enter the same shop while you’re paying.
You make eye contact, knowing you’re both here with the same purpose. As you walk towards her, she doesn’t walk away from you, and that confirms she also wants to talk things through.
The shop has a few tables placed outside, and after Jihyun sits on one you sit in front of her. It's awkward as you put the cupcakes you just bought in front of her.
“I’m-” your voices overlap as you speak the same words. You both laugh awkwardly, and she motions for you to talk first.
“I’m sorry for the way I acted yesterday, it was childish of me to just walk away and not letting you explain, and I shouldn’t have dumped all that to you out of nowhere, I’m sorry.” Afraid of her reaction, the words leave your mouth so fast you barely register what you say.
“I’m the one who should be sorry,” her response is surprising, as you expected to be the only one apologizing, “you were right about what you said, I was a bad friend for not telling you, and I shouldn’t have asked you in front of everyone if you were still in love with him, that was really stupid.” In love. It's weird to hear that about Minghao again, after so many days of getting over him, those words attached to him feel odd.
“And I’m sorry for not noticing that you and Chan liked each other, you really are perfect for one another by the way.”
“Thanks,” your comment breaks a laugh out of her, and you can finally breathe, “so are we ok? I really hate fighting, especially with you.” As the atmosphere relaxes between you two, Jihyun finally grabs one of the cupcakes you bought and starts eating it.
“Yes, I hate fighting too let’s not do that ever again please.” Making up was so easy, you feel ashamed for walking out on her, but now you’ll never do it again.
“Great cause I have something to ask you,” the relief you felt quickly turns into curiosity and you look at her expectantly, “well, it’s more so to confirm Chan's suspicions that a question but, do you have something going on with his brother?”
Red rushes to your face and your stomach drops in shock. Your shyness is a dead giveaway and Jihyun catches up in no time.
“Oh my god he was right?! You must tell me everything now!” Excitement shines through Jihyun’s voice, talking loudly and earning a few weird looks from people passing by.
“Nothing happened, I guess we’re together often and Chan noticed,” the disappointment on your voice is noticeable, “he’s really nice.”
“Channie told me yesterday that you two were acting weird and asked me if you had told me anything.” Jihyun notices something’s wrong, she stretches her hand to take yours, “did he do something?”
“It’s more about what he didn’t do”. The questioning look she gives you urges you to continue, “we went on a walk last night after dinner and Chan caught us before leaving, and I just,” remembering everything you talked about, how he wished he’d met you before, it’s a new kind of pain you’ve never felt before, “I thought he might like me or something, but it was stupid.”
“You know, for Chan to think there was something between you, I don’t think it’s nothing.” Jihyun always tries to be positive, and you do too, but this time you just can’t.
“Well, he had the chance, and he didn’t do anything, I was giving him bedroom eyes and everything!” Now you’re starting to get mad. At you. At him. At you for believing this was more than a passing friendship. At him for being so kind and hot and nice and handsome and a good listener and everything a girl could ask for.
“Maybe he got nervous!”
“He doesn’t seem like the type of guy to get nervous around girls.”
And you’re right. He isn’t. So why did you have such an effect on him that he couldn’t make a move?
From Mingyu’s point of view everything was different. He understood after a few days that he liked you a little more than he should, and it only intensified after you watched the sunrise together.
After your date that shouldn’t be called a date at all, but it felt like one to him, all he wanted was to kiss you, to prove that you’re worthy of someone being head over heels for you. He had been thinking about it the whole night, but in that moment, he froze.
You were looking at him so expectantly, with droopy eyes like you wanted to eat him. It was too much for him, and he’s beating himself for it since.
As soon as you closed your door, his feet automatically lead him to the windy beach, with only the tiny porch roof to shield him from the storm, but he didn’t care.
In the morning, he woke up before everyone as usual and started making breakfast for the two of you, hoping you won’t hate him, hoping he didn’t lose his chance. But then he saw you sprint out the front door like you were running away from him.
All day Mingyu’s been waiting to get you alone, but you were always so busy, talking with someone else or helping to clean up so the house is squeaky clean before everyone leaves tomorrow. If he doesn’t get to explain himself and make it right, he fears he probably won’t see you again for a long time.
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As your last night at the house, everyone decided to have a goodbye party. And by ‘party’ you mean a hang out with no alcohol, because no one wanted to drive six hours while hang over and because you all spent the whole day cleaning and tidying everything up. Just hang out, playing games, maybe one beer or two, not enough to get anyone drunk.
Sitting on the couches as usual, you can feel Mingyu’s gaze piercing through you from across the room. You did avoid him all day, making yourself busy whenever you saw him around, but you didn’t think he noticed.
Your attempts to evade his overwhelming presence are pointless. You don’t look at him, focusing on whoever is talking or pretending to look for something on your phone, but every time you stretch to grab something off the table, he coincidentally goes for it too.
The distance between you might not be noticeable for the naked eye, just casually sitting across from each other, you’re not one to talk much so it’s usual for you to look at who’s talking and not interrupt them. Mingyu’s just the same, but his eyes seem to have got a life of their own and wander to you at your every movement.
It’s killing Mingyu inside to know that you’re avoiding him. He knows he fucked up, but fears that if he confronts you, you’ll just deny it. There's not much he can do in this group setting.
His opportunity arises when everyone decides to do a movie night. It’s weird to watch a movie on your last night, but he won’t oppose to it if it’s an unanimous decision. And when you’re tasked with the popcorn, he knows it’s time to talk to you without anyone hearing. He tags along, throwing some lame excuse to the others saying he’ll help you.
You object, you’ll do just fine on your own, but your legs betray you and don’t stop even when he insists. You’re both inside the kitchen in no time and there’s no running back.
“I’ll just heat the bags on the microwave, and you can take them to the coffee table.” You avoid looking at him too much, trying to focus as best as you can, but the popcorn bags are nowhere to be found. You look inside every cabinet, doing a very rigorous search, anything to keep the interaction as short as possible.
“Let me help you.” As the kind man Mingyu is, he attempts to join you in the search, but if he gets a mere inch closer to you, you might lose it.
“No, it’s fine I can find them.” It comes out harsher than you intend, but at least he backs away.
There’s a minute of silence, only your huffs of frustration can be heard.
“I’m sorry.”
You stop in your tracks, search already forgotten as you scavenge through your mind to find any usable words to respond.
“About what?” You huff incredulously.
“About last night.” Mingyu looks small as he waits for your reply.
“There’s nothing to be sorry about.” The big kitchen suddenly feels too small, the four walls imprisoning you. You ignore his figure as you walk over to the tiny storage room right beside the kitchen. Maybe there are forgotten popcorn bags there and you can finally end this conversation. But Mingyu's committed to his cause and follows you.
“But there is.” It’s almost annoying how adamant he is about whatever he wants to say. You don’t want him to pity you, it’s already embarrassing enough.
“It’s fine, really.” Mingyu followed you inside the tiny room, and when you turn around to face him, he’s dangerously close. Your breath hitches, but you force yourself to not have another reaction.
“It’s not,” barely a meter separates you from Mingyu, too close for your liking but at the same time too far. He realizes and moves forward half a step, so now if you concentrate enough, you can feel his breath as he speaks, “I know you’ve been avoiding me all day because of what happened... I shouldn’t have-”
“Look, maybe I've been avoiding you but it’s because I want to keep the last bit of pride I have left, I thought you wanted to kiss me and you didn’t, it’s okay, you don’t have to pity m-”
The words stop coming out of your mouth a millisecond before Mingyu grabs your face and smashes his lips against yours with force.
The kiss lasts merely seconds, but you melt under his touch instantly. Mingyu’s lips mold over yours perfectly, pillowy and soft, but with authority.
He backs away slowly, your eyes still closed, and your foreheads connected, he gives you a peck before finally separating.
“I wanted to kiss you, I mean, I want to, like all the time.” You watch him with glossy eyes, still dizzy from the kiss.
Your bodies are close like they’ve never been before, you have to move your head up to even see his face. The pumps of your heart are so strong he might even feel them. Your mouth hangs open in shock, your brain makes no sense of what’s happening, and words don’t seem to want to get out of you.
“I should've done that yesterday.” Mingyu can barely contain his smile as he confesses.
“Yeah, you should've!” You chuckle as you jokingly slap him on the chest, “Why didn’t you?”
“I don’t know,” his hands sneak around your waist, fingers creeping inside your t-shirt to touch your bare skin, “you make me nervous.”
“Right, but you don't seem so nervous now,” as his fingers trace circles on your sides, your arms wrap around his neck naturally. Your faces get ever so slightly closer by the second, your chin up and his head down, eyes connected in a trance that draws a smirk on his face.
“Do you forgive me?” He breaks the eye contact, gaze focused on your parted lips.
“Hmm, I don’t know… I’m not convinced yet.” It’s your turn to smirk, trying to get a reaction out of him.
Mingyu’s eyes change before something takes over in him. He wraps his arms around your waist and erases the little distance between your bodies, connecting your lips in a frenzy kiss, nothing like the sweet one before. Your arms hug his neck, bringing his face and body impossibly closer to yours.
You sigh when his hands start traveling across your back as he deepens the kiss, licking your lower lip and tangling your tongues together. His arms hug your waist up, forcing you on your tiptoes to reach his height while your hands on his neck push him down. Like a game of push and pull, both of you fighting for dominance, one pushes their body against the other and the other pushes you both closer, if even possible.
Inside you feel like exploding. You knew you wanted him, but your body wants more, you need more. From the first touch the only thing on your mind is him, his hands on you, your chests flushed together, his lips on yours with force, where they belong. Everywhere he touches feels like it’s on fire. When his hands sneak below your t-shirt and his fingers wander around the unexplored territory, you sigh on his mouth again and you feel his smirk against your lips.
The metal shelves dig onto your back, but you don’t care, all that’s on your mind is him, until some lonely can falls to the ground and makes an inexplicable loud noise that alerts not only the two of you.
“Is everything okay?” Chan’s question comes from far away, but it’s enough to make you jump and push Mingyu away from your face.
“Yeah! We just,” You’re too out of breath to speak more than a couple of words, “couldn’t find the freaking popcorn.”
“Doesn’t Mingyu remember where we keep it?” You turn to catch Mingyu as he smugly retrieves his hand from behind your head to reveal the bags you’ve been looking for.
“Need any help?” Chan’s voice gets dangerously closer.
“No need! Thank you!” You take your chance to snatch the popcorn out of Mingyu's hands and start walking away from him and towards the kitchen, “Mingyu’s so annoying!” You hear Chan's laugh as he leaves.
“But you like me as I am,” Mingyu whispers in your ear, already caught up beside you, smirk so prominent you can even hear it.
“Is it too late to retract?”
“Yep, you’ll have to deal with me forever now.”
“Forever huh?” The humming of the microwave accompanies the moment as you turn around to find Mingyu standing against the kitchen island, arms stretched as if he’s showing off his muscles. He definitely catches you ogling him, but that’s what’s fun.
The knowledge that you’re able to make him nervous is too powerful. Your hunger translates in the way you look at him, standing against the sink in the same way he is, you look at him exactly the same way as the night before, lust and want almost tangible.
You stand still, waiting for him again, but this time he doesn’t chicken out. Slowly, he steps closer to you and cages you in between his arms. The air becomes too thick, atmosphere heavy as you look up at him expectantly.
The microwave beeps behind you but none of you react, too in your own bubble to care about the outside world. His eyes switch between yours, with his eyebrows raised and lightly biting his lower lip, using no words but telling you everything.
His hands sneak around your waist, and you don’t fight the smile cracking on your lips. You move your head forward, craving his lips on yours again.
“Guys what’s taking so long?” You’ve never separated faster. You barely get to turn around and open the microwave before Chan appears inside the kitchen, notoriously troubled. A few steps by your left, Mingyu searches for bowls, his back facing the both of you as to not reveal his blushed face.
Chan’s eyes switch between watching his brother and watching you, waiting for an answer as you grab the piping hot bag and dump the freshly done popcorn into a bowl. The silence is telling, even to him.
“Sorry, we’ll be right there.” Chan grabs the bowl reluctantly, clearly aware that something happened, just not sure what. As he walks away, he even turns his head around to analyze the two of you for a second.
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The movie democratically chosen is quite interesting at first, but after some boring scenes, the little power of concentration you have evaporates. Mingyu’s body is next to yours, legs touching and his arm resting on the back of the couch. What you want need is so close yet so far.
You sit back so he can wrap his arm around you without raising any suspicions, goosebumps run across your entire body when he finally does.
Not engaged in the movie at all, you opt for looking at the man by your side. Mingyu notices your gaze as soon as it lands on him, but he pretends he doesn’t. Everything about your current situation is making him lose his mind. The way you keep searching for his touch, even with all your friends surrounding you, inviting him to sit so close to you, not hiding as you stare at him, everything is making him nervous. The nervousness from the night before crawls back onto his body, because of you, his brother’s best friend, here, how you’re making him feel. He just doesn’t know how to act around you.
As he wraps his arms around you, you snuggle closer to him, only a blanket hiding your closeness from prying eyes. The movie’s long forgotten, with your head on Mingyu’s shoulder, you can only concentrate the rise and fall of his chest, his soft touches on the side of your arm. His warmth is hypnotizing, prompting your hand to place itself on the uncovered skin of his thigh, just above his knee. You don’t miss the way his breath hitches at your touch, goosebumps reveal around the cold of your hand. He expects for you to move it, but your hand stays there, squeezing softly, much too close to his knee, for a few minutes.
When a fight scene breaks on the movie, you take advantage of the noise and the initial shock, and move your palm slightly up Mingyu’s thigh, over his shorts but closer to where his groin starts to wake up.
Judging by Mingyu’s face, there’s nothing suspicious about you two. He stays looking up front, pretending to pay attention to the screen, while inside all he can think about is your hand and what you’re planning to do with it. The expectations excite him just as much as they scare him. All he wants is your body close to his, making you feel through his actions just how much he likes you, but he didn’t think you’d start something while surrounded by all your friends. It’s dark, only the movie lights up the room, and you’re on the far end on the couch where it would be hard for anyone to see you, but it’s still quite exposing. Someone could catch you, you don’t seem to care, and it excites him more than it should.
“I know what you’re doing,” you barely hear his whisper through all the noise.
“Is it working?” Your thumb slowly grazes his skin as he flexes his thigh muscles.
“I have probably minutes of self-control left, so we’ll see.” He backs his head away again and you turn to watch his reaction as your hand moves over his already semi hard cock. Only a few touches and he’s already halfway up. It fills you with pride to know how much of an effect you have on him. Big, strong, serious Mingyu, coming apart under your hand.
Your palm moves up and down his covered length slowly, feeling it getting harder under your touch. His reactions are so minimal that you only notice because you pay attention closely.
What you didn’t anticipate was his hand creeping up your thigh. Slowly, his fingers find their way inside the tiny shorts you put on, drawing circles on your inner thigh, nowhere near enough to your core but still sending waves of arousal through your whole body.
Half of the run time of the movie passes, but your touches stay over your clothes, teasing, barely grazing. You stop palming him the second his index fingers ghosts over your covered clit, your breath hitches and you’re too shocked to keep up your movements. As the seconds pass, Mingyu runs his fingers through your covered folds, feeling how wet you already are.
The movie’s suddenly silent, the main characters looking at each other in the eyes. It's probably a very important scene, but you only concentrate on not making any noise as Mingyu works you up under the blanket.
With your hand still motionless on Mingyu's cock, he stretches until his head reaches your ears when the scene changes and noise fills the room again.
“Let’s go to my room.” There’s no hesitation in his voice.
“You don’t wanna watch the ending?” You tease back. You don’t even know what happened in the movie this whole time.
“If I don’t have my fingers inside you in the next five minutes, I might go crazy.” His statement leaves your jaw hanging as he, contrary to what he just said, removes his hand from you.
“I’m sorry guys, gotta drive tomorrow,” Mingyu suddenly gets up and everyone's confused eyes are on him, “don’t wanna be up until too late.” And with those words, he’s out of the living room in no time.
Everyone's eyes, including Chan’s, go back to the screen, but you stay still. Should you follow after him right now? It’ll be too suspicious, but do you really care?
You wait until the scene changes, as to not seem too obvious, and fake a loud yawn.
“Sorry guys I think I'm calling it a night,” every move you make, you make sure to do it slowly, to show how tired you are, “I don’t wanna fall asleep on the couch.”
As you take a few steps, Jihyun calls for you, “But it’s about to end!”
“Oh! I’ve already seen it it’s fine,” you lie as you face the hallway again, your back turned to Jihyun so your face doesn’t expose you.
You can hear her voice saying something like liar! You wanted to watch it! But you don’t turn back, because you can see Mingyu waiting by his door. He's about to speak but you run and smash your lips with his before he can utter a word.
Your bodies are so tangled together you stumble backwards, but luckily Mingyu manages to catch you before you fall and turns you both inside his room. With his hand pillowing your head, he pins you against the now closed door and you both laugh lightly at your clumsiness. But as soon as your eyes land on each other again, it’s like you’re both hypnotized because your mouths attach again like magnets.
His hair feels soft between your fingers, long enough for you to tug at it lightly. He groans against your mouth and now it’s your turn to smirk. That ignites something in him, because he presses you against the wall at the next tug you give him.
He’s everywhere. His thighs intertwined with yours, his firm chest against yours, one hand on your waist and the other on your neck.
The feeling of his lips is addicting, and now that you’ve finally tasted him you never want to go back. His mouth glides over yours with familiarity, like it’s something he's been doing for years, like he knows exactly how to get you head over heels for him.
You chase his lips as he steps back just a little, and you instantly miss the warmth of his body. The only light source in his room is the moonlight beaming though the window, but it’s enough to admire Mingyu’s messy hair and blood red lips. Your hands stay around his neck and his on your waist, neither of you wanting to stop touching the other.
A strand of hair blocks your view for a second before he brushes it back and tucks it behind your ear.”
“Did you mean all that?” Not his words, but his actions. Kissing you. Did it mean the same for him as it did for you?
“I've been wanting to do that for days,” his hand caresses the side of your face gently and you lean into his touch.
His lips are on your again without warning and you melt at his touch, giving in to him. His lips guide yours slowly, taking his time savoring you. Every move of his has a purpose, every deliberate touch makes you more needy for him.
He's in total control, caging your body against the door, pressing himself against you so you feel his almost fully hard dick against your upper thigh.
His mouth travels down to your neck and makes you gasp, leaving damp kisses on your sensitive skin. Your hands play with the hem of his black t-shirt, and you feel his smirk against your neck. His hands travel all around your body, from your neck to your back to your waist and your ass. You feel him everywhere every second and the heat inside you intensifies per second.
The only thing on your mind is having him. Your hands start lifting his shirt up, he smirks against your lips before separating briefly to take it off and slip his shoes off. You do the same.
You barely get a glimpse of his shirtless body before he’s on you again. Lips on lips, skin on skin, your insides pulsate with need feeling every muscle of his against you. His biceps tense under your touch when he picks you up by your thighs effortlessly.
Legs wrapped around his waist, Mingyu walks with you on his arms towards his bed. He makes sure to drop you softly before getting on top of you. His mouth finds your neck again as he lets you feel his hard bulge against your core. You grind against him, eliciting a moan out of the both of you, but it’s not enough.
With your legs still wrapped around his waist, you press him further against you. Even with the layers of clothes between you, his length grinds deliciously against you, the friction causing the heat inside you to fire up and the idea of having him inside releases a wave of arousal.
“Mingyu!” You intend to draw his attention, but he grinds against you again and it comes out like a moan. He hums against your skin and your fingers on his hair and back encourage him further. His hands roam your body until they reach your poorly clothed chest, but the lousy fabric doesn’t stop him from groping with excitement.
“Mingyu take off your pants.” You manage to grab his head to make him look at you, and he follows immediately.
You take your pants and bra off easily and prop on your elbows to admire him while he struggles to take his off. His frustration makes you chuckle, but his defined muscles distract you quickly. You saw him in just swim shorts days ago, you knew what to expect, but it still shocks you how broad his shoulders are, how his pecs flex at the tiniest movement. The size of his biceps are probably three times the size of yours.
When he finally throws his pants away, he aims to get on top of you again, but you think ahead. You move to the side, so he drops on the bed, and you get on top of his big thighs. The little fabric between you allows you to feel just how hard he is under you, hitting all the right places, making you moan while wetness gushes out of you.
Your hands travel slowly through his chest, fingers tracing his muscles, torturing him with your slow pace and making him squirm at your touch. His little sighs and whines are music to your ears, reaching the deepest parts inside you and ruining your panties more and more.
Proud of the effect you have on him, you grind softly and feel his hard twitch under you. But your fun doesn’t last. Mingyu grabs you by the neck and lowers your body until your faces are millimeters apart, keeping your hands from moving. He attempts to kiss you, but you grind on him again, causing him to moan in your mouth.
“You’re making me crazy,” his lips graze yours when he speaks, and you have to fight every internal scream telling you to kiss him back.
“Good.” You smirk as you shimmy down until your core is no longer sitting on top of his, leaving kisses down his neck while your hand travels down to palm him.
He sighs when your hand sneaks under his underwear to feel his now fully hard cock. Your hand barely wraps around him as you slide it up and down his length slowly, smearing the precum coming out from the tip.
Every little reaction Mingyu gives you encourages you to continue. Every moan when you squeeze harder, every whine when you pay attention to the tip, every sigh when you leave tiny bite marks around his clavicle, where no one else would be able to see them, but hopefully you.
Your wrist works hard as you notice Mingyu’s breath getting heavier and faster, and the fire inside you becomes impossible to ignore.
“Do you have a condom?” You ask as you slowly stop your movements. The ache between your legs keeps you from concentrating on anything else. If he wanted to, he could slide right in with how wet you are.
“Maybe,” the raise of his eyebrows tells you he’s up to no good and you look at him questioningly, “there’s something I gotta do first.” He slots between your legs with a smirk, hands on both sides of your waist and mouth getting closer to your ear.
“Gonna make you cum so hard you won’t even know your name.” His lips leave a trail of kisses below your ear to your mouth, and you sigh as he connects your lips once again. His hands go down and spread your thighs, taking his time grazing and groping everywhere between your inner thighs except for where you want him the most. You can only sigh and push him more against you, still in shock from his previous words.
One hand ghosts over your somehow still clothed core and you try to grind against it, but he moves it away with a chuckle.
“I need you,” you gasp when his hand presses against your pussy, fingers running up and down your lower lips and teases your hole through your panties, “please Gyu,” the nickname slips out of you with a moan.
“Whatever you want baby,” the not so accidental pet name goes straight to your core, too wet by now.
Mingyu starts a trail of kisses down your jaw to your boobs, paying especial attention to them while helping you out of your panties. You try to press against him, now fully naked, but he pins your hips down with force.
His head goes down leaving wet kisses on your skin and making you needier and needier until he reaches your pulsing core.
“You’re so wet already,” he kisses all around, teasing you endlessly as his hands pins you down so you don’t grind up to him, and his breath fans over your wet hole making you shiver, “so needy for me.”
“I swear if you don’t st-Fuuccck,” his tongue flattens on your core mid-sentence, slowly licking up and down, drowning any thought you might possibly have. He dives into you with no intend of stopping any time soon.
The dreamlike scenario of his head between your legs is in no way comparable to reality. He switches between swirling his tongue around your clit and teasing your entrance, drinking up all the juices you give him.
It's embarrassing how fast you’re getting to your orgasm with just a few minutes of him working you up. You tremble as he tortures your clit with his tongue once again, sucking on it lightly almost making you scream. You don’t care how loud you are, and he loves how you sound, how you moan uncontrollably because of him.
His hair is all disheveled because of your hands, tugging and pressing him closer to your core. He moans as he tastes you, sending vibrations through your whole body.
When you close your legs unconsciously around his head, he spreads you again with force, keeping you from shivering and adding newfound energy to tip you over the edge.
“Feels s-sso good Gyu oh my god,” his tongue teases your hole as his nose perfectly grazes your clit. Your mind is so numb you keep mumbling praises you can’t understand, the only thing you know is your orgasm is so close to snapping, you can almost see it, hear it, taste it.
You tremble in his hold, and he knows you’re close. Your hands on his hair keep him in place as you grind on his face, intensifying everything. He moans as you use him, and the vibrations finally make you snap.
Your legs tremble as his tongue licks you clean of the mix of saliva and your juices. It's when it becomes too much for you that you push his head back, and the sight leaves you more breathless than you already were. His chin is covered in your arousal and his lips are swollen from the work they’ve done.
His head stays on the lower side of your body, kissing your inner thighs as you recover. You can only watch him, his hands touching and massaging every part of your legs he can reach, his lips so close to your core, but teasing around where you’re starting to need him again.
“You look really pretty like this.” His words send shivers down your spine.
“So I usually don’t?” He halts his movements as you tease to look you in the eye but continues after he takes notice of the teasing tone.
“You are always pretty,” you throw your head back against the pillow at his words, “every second of every day,” the kisses on your inner thigh come closer and closer to your core, already gushing with need.
His lips ghost over your folds as he backs away just the tiniest bit to reveal his index finger moving towards his mouth. His eyes connect with yours as he licks his fingers, and the sight almost blocks your airways. You don’t want to stop watching but when his wet finger starts circling around your clit slowly, your eyes shut instinctively.
You feel him collecting your juices when he suddenly dips his finger into your hole. You moan at the intrusion but he’s quick to remove it and he’s back at circling around your wet clit.
He does the motion a few times, finger in then quickly out, circles around your covered clit with the freshly collected juices, and repeat.
“please" only a broken whisper leaves your mouth as your hand stops his movements. Your eyes connect with Mingyu’s after what feels like hours of teasing, and you can see a little smirk forming before following your needs.
His two fingers enter you slowly, letting you feel everything until he’s knuckle deep inside you. You’re so wet and needy from the foreplay that they just slide in.
He stretches your velvety walls perfectly, with a pace hard and deep that has you moaning uncontrollably.
When he finds that perfect spot that has you seeing stars, your hand jolts down to keep his in place and his fingers start abusing your gspot mercilessly. You almost scream when he adds a third finger inside you, squelching sounds filling the rooms with your moans as you get closer and closer to another orgasm.
Your walls begin to spasm around his fingers, letting him know that you're close once again. With your hand freeing his, he thrusts sharper into you, even if your walls close hard around them pushing them out.
All 5 senses explode within you when you feel his tongue toying with your clit again and your second orgasm hits powerfully. His hands help keep you in place as he maintains his movements, prolonging the orgasm as he pleases.
He licks his fingers clean as he climbs on top of you again. Your haze connects with his and you can’t look away as he removes his digits from his mouth and directs them to yours. Almost robotically, you open your mouth to welcome them and lick them clean without breaking eye contact. The mix of your juices and his saliva spike something within you. Your gaze turns to fire as you grab Mingyu by the neck and pull him towards you. Your lips connect with his fingers in between, both of you licking then clean as the same time. Your tongue plays with his fingers, finding his tongue doing the same and intertwining.
Entranced by you, Mingyu backs away once more and can only watch as you lick his fingers like it was his cock. Your eyes still meet his as you swirl your tongue around and eventually stop with a pop.
The speed of light doesn’t compare to how fast Mingyu crashes his lips with yours again. He grabs you by the waist and flips you both so now his back is against the headboard and you're sitting on top of him. His lips guide yours lazily as his hands travel around your naked back, and when you moan when he grinds up to you, he has to stop before he cums straight away.
You’re still recovering from the earth-shattering orgasm he gave you to speak, and he just looks at you with a little smile growing on his face. He pecks you sweetly, but when you don’t respond he worries.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m more than okay,” you chuckle as you feel your face turning pink, “you were kind of a beast down there, I need a second.”
“I could do that every day if you let me,” he sounds way too enthusiastic as he begins a trail of wet kisses on your neck. A moan escapes you when his hands find your breasts and your wetness uncomfortably starts to stain his boxers below you.
“Take these off.” You grab the waistline of his boxers to draw Mingyu's attention away from your neck and it works. He slips them off at the speed of light and you're back on top of him.
Your wet folds finally come in contact with his cock and you both moan at the feeling. With his hands on your waist, he aims to kiss you, but you surprise him by grinding on him and he moans on your mouth, your lips barely touching. His veiny cock grazes against your clit deliciously, clouding any coherent thought you may have. Mingyu’s just as gone as you are, with his hands playing with your boobs and your juices wetting his entire cock, he might just be in heaven.
“I’ll cum If you keep going like that,” Mingyu has half the mind to speak up. It’s a warning, but you take it as a challenge.
“What if that’s what I want?” You wrap your arms around his neck as best as you can as you slowly keep grinding on him, trying to hide the fact that it has as much of an effect on you as it does on him, maybe even more.
“Hmm I don’t think that’s what you want.” His left-hand sneaks between your bodies as the other plays with your nipple and you halt your movements. His fingers quickly find your clit and press on it with a little force, making you gasp.
“You can have anything you want, if you just ask.” His hands pleasuring you everywhere simultaneously blur your mind. You can’t find it in you to form a coherent sentence, so you resume your grinding. It's so slow you can feel every drag against you, every vein against your wet folds, his tip perfectly against your clit. You want nothing more than to feel him inside you, stretching you until your walls are shaped like him.
“Need you inside,” your words come out more of a gasp than anything, “please.”
Mingyu’s hands stray away from your body, quickly reaching the small packet that was waiting on his nightstand and rips it open as you move away from his cock to give him some space. He rolls the condom on swiftly and you stop yourself from jumping on him.
His hands on your waist and yours on his shoulders to stabilize you, you slowly sink on his length. Yours and Mingyu’s moans synchronize as his cock stretches your walls, filling you up until you feel him on your throat.
When you completely sink down on him, he reaches so deep you almost have trouble breathing, reaching places you’re just now discovering. You stay still as your gummy walls hug his length tightly, trying to get used to the new stretch. Sensing your hesitation to move, Mingyu kisses you softly, both of you melting into the other’s touch. Your arms wrap themselves around his neck for the millionth time, like they’re meant to be there until the end of time, and the slight movement causes Mingyu to shift inside you.
His lips muffle your moans as one of his hands sneak back down to stimulate your clit once again. His fingers draw circles on you, you can feel your arousal dripping onto him, and little by little, the stretch stops stinging, the feeling replaced by want and need.
Using his body to support you, you lift your hips slowly. His low groans fill your ears as every vein drags inside of you deliciously.
Without warning, you sit back with force, getting a moan out of the both of you. His lust filled eyes watch you in awe as his hands grab your ass while you’re repeating the motion. The addictive hitting of his cock inside you almost makes you not notice how tired you’re getting.
Mingyu stops you once you sink down again, embracing you with his arms and pulling you towards him. Your chests are flushed together again as he kisses you deeply, his tongue quickly encountering yours, and he flips you over.
Your back hits the mattress and he's between your legs again. He begins a slow pace, thrusting into you until his pelvis barely touches your swollen clit and then almost all the way out. The pace continues to be torturous until he finds the spot he’s been looking for and you almost scream, egging him on to hit it again and again and again.
With force, every thrust of his hips has you seeing stars. You can’t control your noises any longer, even mumbling a few phrases you can’t quite decipher, but that Mingyu seems to like.
The bed squeaks and hits the wall repeatedly but neither of you care. With your legs wrapped around his waist and your nails digging on his back, you can only think about the tight knot on your lower stomach about to burst.
His face is so close to yours, but neither of you have the mind to do anything other than moan in each other's mouths. Any sound you make, he replicates, blessing your ears and sending waves of pleasure to your already so close body.
Your walls are tightening so hard that Mingyu has trouble keeping up his fast pace, but after telling him how close you are, he starts pounding on you so hard you have to hug him so stay in place. Caged between your arms and legs, Mingyu’s body is glued to yours, his hot skin burning him on you as he drills your insides and blurs your brain.
“y-you’re so t-tight, pleasse tell me you’re cl-close,” his words barely register on your mind and your brain can’t work out a response, so he makes sure you hear him by putting his mouth next to your ear, but never stopping pounding into you, “are you fucked dumb already?”
His words shoot straight to your core, pulsing tight around him. Mingyu tries to muffle a moan by chuckling, but you already know the effect you have on him.
“s-so close Gyu, wish you-” you clench around him around him as you say, “wish you could come inside.”
Mingyu’s hips stutter at your words, and he has to slow down his pace to not cum right that second, but doesn’t miss the chance to play your little game, “you’d like that wouldn’t you? Me filling you up until you’re so full you start dripping?” His lips leave a trail of goosebumps below your ear, giving you a few kissed around your neck before going back up to look you in the eyes as he continues his tortuously slow thrusts.
“Yes yes I want it so bad,” you have no idea if what you’re saying makes any sense, but the smirk Mingyu shows is worth it.
“You wouldn’t waste a single drop right?” his thrust become hard and pointed after you nod eagerly, hitting your gspot with force after every word that leaves his mouth, “I'd stuff it back into you, and you’d be a good girl and keep it in.”
The pet name combined with the sharp thrusts send you over the edge embarrassingly fast. Without warning, you’re cumming on Mingyu’s cock, moaning all kinds of nonsense, squeezing him so tight it’s hard for him to delay his own orgasm. His thrusts don’t stop, stretching you orgasm and chasing his, and in no time, you feel his dick twitch inside you as his hips stutter with a moan.
He stills inside you, body draped over yours as you both recover. You're so tired your eyes start closing on their own, but Mingyu sliding out of you wakes you up instantly, triggering a quiet moan out of your throat.
You don’t want him to leave, and he catches your worried eyes as he gets up, “I’m going to grab a towel to clean up, I'll be right back,” he reassures you with a soft hand on your thigh.
After he hands you a clean towel, he gets back to the bathroom to clean himself up.
Alone in his bedroom and all cleaned up, you scan around after grabbing his big t-shirt to wear. It's obvious this is the room he uses in their frequent family visits, judging by the framed photos and the few posters on the walls. Even with only the bedside table lamp on, except the clothes recently scattered around the floor, you can see you clean and tidy the room is, his clothes are packed neatly, only a few items still on his desk.
“That looks nice on you,” Mingyu’s voice startles you, and you find him watching you from the bathroom door.
“Thanks, it’s some guys’, you probably don’t know him.” He chuckles, walking towards the bed as you tuck yourself in.
“And who is this mystery guy?” Mingyu asks as he get in bed behind you, embracing you in his arms with your back against his chest.
“It’s this guy who’s totally head over heels for me,” you turn around in his arms to find him smiling, “and I really like him too.” His eye wrinkles appear as his smile widens, but you don’t notice as you’re too shy to look at him again after your confession.
“He’s really lucky then.” Mingyu, aware of your shyness, grabs your chin and makes you look at him, “do you really?” The question freezes you in place as lock his serious gaze. He’s dying of nervousness inside, worrying about you, and him, and the two of you.
“Yes,” your voice comes out small and careful, but it relaxes him, “I really do like you Mingyu.”
No words can describe the burst of emotions Mingyu feels as those words leave your mouth. He can only hug you tighter and aim to kiss you, but you turn your head away laughing.
“Hey hey hey! What about you! I’m not letting you anywhere near me until you give me an honest reply!” You find yourself play fighting with this giant man for like three seconds before he pins you down.
“Funny thing to say while you’re in my bed, wearing my shirt,” your hands are trapped by his on both sides on your head, he’s all you can see, and you have no choice but to look him in the eyes. “I know I should’ve said it before, but I really like you too, I’m most comfortable when I’m with you, I’ve never felt like this before and I don’t want this to be a quick fling between us.”
His confession has your stomach doing flips and turns, your blood rushing to your cheeks and ears, and your smile to wide it almost hurts. “That's what I wanted to hear.”
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DAY SEVEN
Mingyu’s arms now rank first as your favorite place to sleep ever.
After making each other repeat their confessions multiple times – mostly you, but he found he loves the way you blush every time you say you like him – and kissing lazily while wrapped around one another, time flashed by and sleepiness got to the both of you.
The culprit of waking you up from your dream forcefully is Mingyu’s damn alarm, ringing and ringing somewhere in his room. You turn a couple of times, trying to locate his phone without getting up, but it’s pointless.
“Mingyuuuu your phone,” your voice echoes alongside the annoying alarm as you try to wake him up.
“Hmm sorry,” his raspy voice barely reaches you as he gets up and grabs his phone from the pocket of his pants laying on the floor.
He quickly gets back under the covers, wrapping his arms around you and snuggling against you, both of you too awake by now to get back to sleep.
Your eyes are closed, but you can feel his chest rising and falling behind you and his hand caresses your waist through his t-shirt. You lay your hand over his as he kisses your neck softly.
“Good morning beautiful.” You’re too trapped in his embrace to turn around and face him, but you get to hide the blush that creeps up your cheeks at his words.
“Good morning.” Being wrapped around Mingyu’s warmth is addicting, his touch, his smell, his skin. How did you live all these years without them? “Should we get up? Everyone is probably awake by now.” You really don’t want to, but sadly you can’t stay here forever.
“We will, we will,” his hands wander lower and lower on your body, contradicting his words, until they reach the hem of your his shirt and sneak inside to caress your bare skin as he keeps kissing your neck, “are you not wearing-”
The sentence is left unfinished, his state of shock loosens his hug and you’re able to turn in his embrace, cocky smile on your face as he tries to figure you out.
“Oh, I must’ve forgot!” Mingyu joins you in a chuckle, hugging you tightly again and bringing your face towards him. Lazily kissing him, with your limbs intertwined and a little morning sleepiness, everything makes you so dizzy, already needy for him.
His tongue breaches into your mouth, messily dancing with yours as his hand pushes your shirt up and sneak to your core.
You don’t stay still. With your hands you touch and grope every spot of his torso you can reach, earning a few sighs from him, and you slowly start grinding on his hand, coating his curious fingers with your arousal.
Mingyu moans in your mouth when your hand catches his growing bulge, trying to be as quiet as possible in case anyone awake wanders your way.
“You’re gonna be de death of me.” His raspy whisper shoots straight to your core, but you can’t give him a proper reply, his lips go back to yours to shut you up as his fingers run through your wet folds.
Both of your hands work wonders on the other, your hand sneaks under his boxers to stroke him properly while he toys with your clit. It’s getting more and more difficult to quiet down the sounds coming from your mouths, your mind barely able to remember that task as the fire inside you stomach arises.
A knock on the door freezes you both in place. You stop breathing, locking eyes with Mingyu, waiting for the unannounced person to speak up. He looks as scared as you probably are as you both wait.
Another knock makes you get away from one another, and the ruffling sounds draw the attention of the one outside the door.
“Are you awake bro?” Chan asks through the door, luckily not opening it. Your eyes emanate panic as you evaluate every possible outcome for this interaction, but Mingyu motions for you to calm down.
“Hmm yeah, what do you want?” He pretends to just wake up, feigning a loud yawn.
“You know where y/n is? She’s not in her room and Jihyun’s looking for her.” Now Mingyu panics too, trying to come up with any excuse, no matter how lame.
“I don’t know bro, maybe she’s in the bathroom.” Definitely the lamest excuse ever, but it seems to work.
“Right, right, I’ll tell her that, but get up bro! We’re leaving in like an hour!”
“Okay! I’ll be right out.”
You both stay still, listening as his steps get farther and farther until there’s silence again.
“We really should tell him about us, he won’t be mad.” He sounds serious as he picks up your clothes from the floor.
“Take me out on a date first!” You snatch your clothes from his hands as you both chuckle. How would a date with Mingyu go? Outside of this bubble you created, everything could be different, but the change excites you.
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The drive back to the city is full of laughter and songs, just like the first day. This time Chan managed to get on the passenger’s seat first, leaving you sitting next to Jihyun’s curious eyes and separating you from Mingyu.
You feel much better than on the first day. Relaxed, with less weight in your shoulders, and a really hot man making eyes at you through the rear view mirror.
Mingyu leaves Chan and Jihyun at his house first, saying it’s more practical to drop them off first and then you. None of them argue about it, and Jihyun throws a wink your way as you get on the passenger’s seat.
“You know, yesterday Jihyun asked me about us, she says everyone’s suspicious.” You mention when he parks in front of your building.
“That’s funny, cause Chan asked me today too, he intercepted me as soon as I got to the kitchen.” He replies and gets out of the car, leaving you hanging for a few seconds before opening your door.
“Really?” Mingyu’s grabbing your bags while you’re dying of curiosity behind him. “And what did you say?”
He chuckles as you walk towards your building, car locked and your bags still in his hands. He only answers once you get to the elevator.
“I told him… that I really like you.” A smile cracks wide on your face. You’ll never get tired of him saying that.
“And did he seem okay with it?” You quickly reach your floor and head to your door, anxiety creeping up on you at the thought of Mingyu being inside your apartment.
“Yeah! He even seemed kind of happy,” you stand by your door just watching him expectantly and he seems confused by your stillness, “are we coming in?”
“Oh yeah just, it’s a little messy I’m sorry, I wasn’t expecting to have guests you know.” You turn your door handle slowly, waiting for him to nod before fully opening it.
You walk in slowly, watching his every move and reaction as he steps behind you. He gives it a quick look around before crouching to leave your bags on the floor and walking towards you.
“I like your place, it’s so… you.” His arms wrap softly around your waist, and yours instinctively around his neck.
“How do you know? We’ve know each other for like seven days.” You’re not strangers, you told him stuff you’d never tell anyone else, but you've also known him for a very short amount of time.
“I just know.” The sweet smile he give you melts you in place, if it weren’t for his arms surrounding you, you’d probably fall onto the floor. “And I really want to make that time longer, I meant it when I said forever.”
And he proved to you, time and time again during those seven days, that his words are always true. You have no reason not to trust him, and you always will.
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i really hope you liked this >.< share your thoughts!
taglist: @gaslysainz @soffiyuhh @oneandonlyluvv @gyuwoosbabie sorry for the wait
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oddinary4bts · 6 months ago
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Chasing Cars | ch 3 (jjk)
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☆summary: when your brother goes to study on a semester abroad, your life collides with his best friend Jeon Jungkook, who's coincidentally your roommate. Will you survive the collision, or will you crumble into dust?
☆pairings: brother's best friend!Jungkook x younger sister!female reader
☆rating: 18+ (minors DNI, this chapter contains mature content)
☆genre: forbidden love?au, college!au, slice of life!au, smut, angst (as usual a lot of it), fluff
☆warnings: a power outage, Jungkook being a menace as per always, getting stood up for Valentine's Day, falling on a patch of ice, alcohol, curses, peach, OC gets a little jealous, explicit content: teasing?, dom!Jungkook, big dick!Jungkook, sex toy (vibrator), male and female masturbation, praising, cum play (don't be stupid), fingering
☆word count: 13.2k
☆a/n: this is like one of my fav chapters in this whole series, and also the one inspired by jungkook's iconic live with the candle and the white dress shirt and oof :') hope you enjoy it!! Thank you to @moonleeai and @jessikahathaway for beta-ing, you guys are the best <3
☆series masterpost
☆add yourself to the taglist here!
☆☆☆☆☆
If I lay here If I just lay here Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
Chasing Cars, Snow Patrol
☆☆☆☆☆
Thursday, February 14th 
Sometimes, the universe aligns to create such a shitty day that you think your life is a joke. A cruel joke, and you’re just the sitcom character that people use to make themselves feel better.
Today has been one of those days. You woke up late, somehow not hearing your alarm, and got to your midterm so late you didn’t have time to finish. At least you were confident in the answers that you did write down, so you think there’s a chance you’ll still pass. 
Then, you forgot your student ID, and the lady at the cafeteria refused to let you eat even though she’s seen you almost every day of the semester so far. Nabi offered you some of her salad, but you felt bad and barely ate.
Then the rain started – freezing rain at that – and you had to run to the other building for your genetics class, ending with your hair half frozen and the knowledge that you’re going to get sick by tomorrow.
Genetics class in and of itself is fine. Your stomach gurgling all through the class isn’t, and you’ve noticed people looking at you where you’re sitting, every time your stomach thinks it’s a whale and it needs to sing to its fellow mates.
During break, someone offers you a protein bar, and you take it with cheeks burning, thanking them profusely. Though you hate the taste of protein bars, and you struggle to finish it without puking on the desk. You power through, and then the class resumes, and you try to focus. It’s hard, and when you receive a text from Hoseok, you stop pretending that you’re listening.
[2:47 pm] Hobi: have u seen the weather outside? [2:47 pm] You: yeah it’s trash. I think I’m still half frozen [2:49 pm] Hobi: don’t have power at my place anymore [2:50 pm] Hobi: and it looks dangerous to drive
You know exactly what’s coming. It shouldn’t even come as a surprise – you don’t know why you agreed to meet up on Valentine’s Day. Yet, you’ve been looking forward to it all day, perhaps because it’s been so shit even hanging out with Hoseok on this day of celebration of love seemed better.
[2:50 pm] Hobi: any chance I can get a raincheck?
You want to bash your head on the desk, and of course, the professor chooses this exact moment to call you out for being on your phone. You flush a deep red, mumbling an apology as you put your phone face down on the desk. Everyone’s looking at you, and from where you’re sitting at the back of the class you can see that half the people aren’t even taking notes. You think they’re full of shit for glaring at you, but you can’t help the way you turn crimson, and Nabi stifles a laugh next to you.
“Shut up,” you whisper through gritted teeth, elbowing her in the ribs. 
She shrugs innocently, and then her eyes slide back to the professor as he resumes the class. Not wanting to risk it, you focus too, and it seems the shame is what you need to finally concentrate because you find yourself typing away on the computer, describing the pictures in the PowerPoint slides so you can understand them later.
The lights go out five minutes before the end of the class. The projector shuts down in time, a clear indication that the college has run out of power too – something that rarely ever happens unless it’s the end of the world outside.
There’s a series of gasps, and the professor looks so jaded at the front of the class that you wouldn’t be surprised if he’s made of the actual precious stone. He looks towards the door, where you can see that the light has also gone out in the hallway.
Without even a glance at the class, he slams his laptop shut, heaving out a sigh.
“Class dismissed for today, we don’t have enough time left to wait for the power to come back on.” 
It doesn’t even take half a second before everyone is starting to put their stuff away, the class suddenly overcome with a cacophony of sounds, and Nabi turns to you.
“Who were you texting during class?” she asks, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively.
“Shut up.” You put your laptop in your bag, chugging the rest of your water bottle before you stuff it next to the laptop. “Hobi cancelled on me.”
Of course the whole friend group now knows about you two. You have Hoseok to blame for that, and his incredibly good idea to have sex at a party last week, where Yoongi walked in on the two of you. You’ve never seen Yoongi look more uncomfortable before in your life and, to your surprise, he’s been teased about the situation a lot more than you or Hoseok. It’s still a relief because you were afraid the friend group would go to shit if people knew, but now it seems it’s only solidified it even more.
“Bruh,” Nabi lets out. “Why?”
You motion to the dead neon lights over your heads. “The weather. He doesn’t have power anymore.”
“Shit.” You finish packing your stuff and you’re walking out of the class when she continues, “That’s wild though, didn’t think the freezing rain would hit that bad.”
A girl in front of you turns as if summoned. “They’re saying it’s going to be the worst storm of the century.” She points her phone towards you and Nabi, screen first. “Look, tons of trees have already fallen.”
Your eyes widen, because indeed she’s showing a picture from a group chat, of a tree having fallen on someone’s poor car. You wince in time with Nabi.
“RIP to whoever’s car that is,” you answer.
The girl nods, a wistful expression taking over her features. “That would be my boyfriend’s.”
You don’t talk more after that, and she jogs to join her friends closer to the stairs. You take that as an opportunity to finally reply to Hoseok, grabbing your phone out of the pocket of your coat.
[3:59 pm] You: power even went out in college so yeah, np!
Hoseok is quicker to reply than you’ve expected, saying that he’d like to meet up some time this weekend if you can. You don’t promise him anything, though you don’t really have plans as of right now.
You’ve just got a feeling that, if the storm is going to be the storm of the century, you won’t be hanging out for at least a few days. And the moment you step outside, you realize that it might even take more than a few days.
Trees have fallen everywhere. The sidewalk is entirely iced, and just by the time you’ve made it to the bus stop in front of the building, you’ve seen a car accident, both cars unable to stop at a stop sign. You figure taking the bus would be dangerous right now, and you settle on aiming for the pedestrian trail that leads to a park near your apartment, while Nabi parts to head towards the dorm, where apparently the power is still on. She tells you to let her know if you have power at home, and then you turn to head towards home, fishing your phone out of your pocket.
At least it’s not raining heavily as you walk. It’s the only positive thing in your day, and you hold onto your phone, sending a text to Taehyung to inform him of the situation.
You’re two minutes from home when you slip on a slab of ice, and you fall in a puddle of mud that stains your pale pants. You don’t even know how there can be mud when everything else is frozen, but of course, you had to fall in it. You assess yourself for a second, making sure nothing hurts too bad and then you mutter, “Of fucking course.”
You don’t even feel like getting up. If it wasn’t for the fact that the mud in which you’re sitting is freezing, you think you’d sit there until you died. You feel drained, and the weight of the day finally hits you head-on, bringing tears to your eyes.
Or maybe it’s just the embarrassment of walking home with your favourite pair of pants ruined. You don’t even know anymore; too much has happened in just a few hours for your brain to accept to be working anymore. You angrily blink the tears away, knowing you’ll break down the second you step inside your own home.
You can only hope that Jungkook is not going to be there. You hold onto that hope as you get to the building, and when you see the lights are out, the tears win against you. You carefully walk up the stairs – even they are covered in a thick sheet of ice – and surprisingly, you make it to the top unscathed.
You try to unlock the door with shaky fingers, struggling to find the hole through the blurriness of your tears, and you almost consider breaking the door down when it suddenly swings open in front of you.
“Peach?”
You’re aware that you’ve got fat tears rolling down your cheeks. You’re aware that you probably look a mess – you are a mess – but all you can do is stare at Jungkook.
“Is something wrong?” he asks, voice laced with concern as he steps aside to let you in.
You put your bag down, shrugging as he shuts the door behind him carefully, eyeing you as if you’re a specimen of a rare animal that’s going to run if he startles it. You refuse to meet his gaze, refuse to speak lest you embarrass yourself with crying even more. All you do is angrily wipe your cheeks with the back of your hand.
“Hey,” he says, and he puts a hand on your shoulder. “What’s wrong?”
You motion around. “What’s wrong?” You scoff, and out of spite, you force down the wave of tears that is threatening to meet the ones you’ve just dried on your cheeks. “Everything is fucking wrong.”
You glance at Jungkook, and he’s just watching, eyes widened. He seems startled by your outburst, and you think you see him gulp.
“Do you…” he trails off, glancing at the door. You only then realize that he’s clad in his winter coat, and he was probably on his way out when you arrived. “Do you want to talk about it?”
You shake your head no, hating yourself for the way your bottom lip trembles. 
His hand is still on your shoulder, and it slowly slides to your arm. “Did you hurt yourself?” he asks.
He’s only then realized that you’re half-covered in mud.
“I fell on a patch of ice,” you answer.
He makes you turn, assessing the damage. “If you soak your pants in water, I can get the stain out.”
“There’s no power.”
He turns you back around, offering you a small smile as he cocks an eyebrow arrogantly. “Astute.”
You want to punch him so bad, but what you do is laugh, which makes you think you’ve gone crazy.
“Water still runs, though,” he points out. “I’ll take care of it when the power comes back on. Doesn’t even need to be warm. You can save what’s left of the hot water for a shower if you want?”
He says it like a question, and you shrug your shoulders. A new tear rolls on your cheek, and to your surprise, Jungkook dries it with his thumb. He then points to your shoes.
“Take these off. You’re going to take a shower before the neighbours steal the water.”
“I don’t…” you trail off, as he’s just staring at you as if what you were going to say was going to be the stupidest shit he’s ever heard. As much as you want to hate him right now, the way his hand feels on your arm is making the anxiety lessen, until you realize that it’s going to be okay.
You can head to Ria and Nabi’s dorm right after a quick shower.
“M’kay,” you finally accept. “But you can go, you don’t have to stay.”
He shrugs, and when he lets go of your arm, you almost want to grab his hand and put it back there. “I was just going to charge my phone in my car. It can wait.”
You hold his gaze, feeling swallowed by his big doe eyes. It finishes drying the tears on your waterline, and you take a deep steadying breath. “M’kay,” you repeat.
At that he smirks, nodding his head once. He kicks off his shoes as you carefully take yours off, and then he makes grabby hands at you.
“What?” you ask.
“Your coat,” he answers. “I’ll put it in the closet for you.”
You slightly frown. “Why?”
“Because I’m trying to be nice?” When you remain silent, he chuckles. “You think I’m just going to let my best friend’s sister cry when she gets home?”
The words hurt, even though they’re just a statement of what you are to him. “You’re so random.”
He looks somehow offended. “Just give me your coat, peach.” He’s stern, and you have half a thought to mimic him, but you resist. When you hand him the coat, he offers you a grin. “See, that wasn’t so hard.”
Once again you surprise yourself by laughing, and the grin on his lips softens in a way that makes you warm inside.
“You’re annoying,” you whine.
He shrugs as he opens the closet. “Just go take a quick shower. Make sure to soak the pants too.”
“Yes, mom.”
He chokes on a snort. “Oof, no, don’t call me mom.”
You stifle a laugh, but a smile tugs at the corner of your lips. He faces you again, and you startle as he pinches your cheek. You push him off, as all he does is offer you a wide grin that makes dimples appear on his cheeks.
You’ve never really seen those dimples before, not while he’s smiling. You have to force yourself to look away, and as entrancing as they are, you manage to have your gaze drop to a random spot on the floor. “Alright then, I’ll grab my stuff. You can charge your phone while I’m in the shower.”
“All good, I’m at 65%,” he says. “I just checked online, and the power outage will likely last through the night so… figured I didn’t have anything better to do.”
You purse your lips. “Oh.”
There’s an awkward silence before he motions to the bathroom. “Aren’t you going?”
Your cheeks burn, and you nod once before heading towards your room as he snorts behind you, evidently laughing at you. You ignore him, quickly grabbing a change of clothes and bringing them to the bathroom. Jungkook’s moved to the couch, and to your surprise you see him with a book in hand.
“You read?”
The question is out before you realize, and Jungkook’s head snaps in your direction.
“It’s for a class.”
You nod once. “Right.” You then scrape your throat, glance at the bathroom and then settle your eyes on him again. “I’ll be right back.”
He smiles at you, and it’s the last thing you see before you walk into the bathroom, softly shutting the door behind you. Luckily enough, it’s still light enough outside for you to be able to shower without being in the dark, and as Jungkook advertised, there’s still hot water.
You take the fastest shower of your life, not wanting to risk running out of hot water, and then you put your dirty pants in the sink, soaking them in cold water. You put your clean clothes on – nothing impressive, just a pair of black sweatpants with a white t-shirt. You take one look at yourself in the mirror – you look like you’ve gone through hell, but at least you’re refreshed. 
With a steadying breath, you walk out of the bathroom, and your eyes immediately find Jungkook where he’s still sitting on the couch, looking like he hasn’t moved an inch. He glances at you before resuming his attention on his book. You feel awkward, yet you still walk in his direction because, frankly, what else is there for you to do when there’s no power?
“What’s the book about?” you enquire.
He raises it for you to see as you sit next to him. He moves too fast, and all you can see is something about trickle-down economy before the book is back in his lap.
“Looks boring.”
He laughs. “It is. Plus, trickle-down economics is bullshit.”
You nod wisely, even though your knowledge in the economy and business field is little to zero. All you know is that trickle-down economics is what rich people use to defend their actions, which immediately makes it so you don’t trust it one bit.
Eat the rich and all that.
“Right,” you let out.
Jungkook throws you a glance. “Feeling better?”
You don’t know how to answer. Because, yes, you feel somehow better now that you are clean and warmed from the shower, but you’re still very aware that the power is out, you’ve likely failed a midterm, and your date was cancelled.
“Sort of,” you answer, shrugging your shoulders. “Today was just a shitshow.” 
He says nothing, but his big eyes on you entice you to open up to him, making you feel more at ease than you’ve ever been around him.
Maybe because you just need someone to vent to after all.
“Like… I woke up late this morning,” you tell him. “Arrived so late to my midterm that I couldn’t finish. Then realized that I forgot my wallet here and couldn’t eat lunch. Got stood up for a date tonight, and now no power here? This day has been the worst.”
You sit back on the couch after you’ve finished your tirade, and Jungkook just looks at you curiously. You don’t register you’ve called hanging out with Hoseok a date until Jungkook says, “You had a Valentine’s Day date?”
You shut your eyes, pinch the bridge of your nose and exhale loudly. “Sort of. Not really a date.”
“How can it not really be a date?”
You entirely miss the teasing in his voice, mostly because you’re appalled at yourself for the slipping. “It’s just… my friend with benefits, so not a date.”
“Damn, peach,” he says, and he bursts out laughing. You crack an eye open, your heart feeling like it’s been stabbed as Jungkook grins at you. “Didn’t think you were one to have a friend with benefits.”
You narrow your eyes at him. “Why?”
“I don’t know.” He shrugs, and his gaze slides away from you as his brows furrow slightly. “You’re Tae’s sister, and the way he talks about you I just… I don’t know.”
Annoyance creeps into you as you cock an eyebrow. “You shouldn’t listen to what Taehyung says about me. He still thinks I’m twelve.”
Jungkook snorts, and to your surprise, it makes you smile, right as he glances at you. 
“Are you not?”
“Yah!” You punch him in the shoulder, and he laughs as he massages the spot. “I’ll have you know I’m an adult.”
His features turn somber, and he plays with his piercing for a time before he answers. “I’m starting to realize it, trust me.”
In the somberness of his eyes, a spark ignites, and you feel as if electricity is running on every inch of your body. You wish it would run into the building instead, bringing the power back on but unfortunately, you’re the only victim, and all you can do is hold his gaze.
The moment stretches until you grow uncomfortable, and your eyes slide to the Switch under the TV, as if it’ll find solace there.
“Anyway,” you say, scraping your throat. “Apparently there’s still power at the dorms so I think I’ll head over there.”
“You’ll abandon me?” he says, faking offence. “Right when I offered to take care of your pants? The nerves on you.”
You roll your eyes as the awkwardness fades to be replaced by the annoyance Jungkook usually brings out of you. “You’re a big boy, you don’t need me.”
“You sure you want to walk all the way there though? What if you fall again?”
You push him as he smiles wickedly, satisfied that he’s annoyed you. “I hate you.”
“You know what you hate even more than me?”
Your brow creases in confusion. “What?”
He shrugs his shoulders, a smirk growing on his lips. “You’ll have to stay for me to answer.”
You sigh deeply, folding your arms on your chest. You gauge him, watch as his smirk only widens while you ponder staying here. And you don’t even know why you’re considering it in the first place. There’s just something about being able to talk to Jungkook like this, about being comfortable next to him that makes you want to stay.
“Name a single reason why I should stay,” you finally say.
His smirk turns victorious. “I’ll cook something for you.”
“The power is out,” you feel the need to remind him. 
He throws you a no-bullshit look. “Really, peach, you need to find a bit of creativity in your life.”
“What?”
“The stove doesn’t run on electricity, it runs on gas.”
You look up at the ceiling. “How was I supposed to know that, I barely ever cook.”
“I cook!” he bursts, waving the book around. You didn’t realize he was still holding it, and you laugh as the pages flutter around.  “And you usually steal my food, so just let me make something for you tonight.”
You purse your lips, meeting his gaze as he looks at you, faking annoyance. “What do you want to cook?”
“I have chicken that I need to cook tonight if I don’t want it to go bad,” he says. “I can make noodles with it.”
It takes you all but two seconds before you realize that there’s no way you’re going to leave when Jungkook is suggesting to cook for you. “Alright.”
“Yeah?” You nod, and Jungkook beams. “You won’t regret it.”
You laugh, slightly shaking your head as he puts the book away and gets up. He offers you his hand, the one with the tattoos on the back of it, and you furrow your brows. “What?”
“Go get changed,” he says, hand still extended between you. “I’ll give you a Valentine’s Day date, but you’re going to have to play the part too.”
Something stops in your chest – your heart, most likely – and you’re hit with the thought that this is a bad idea. That whatever Jungkook means by that is going to be the mistake of the century, yet you still find yourself accepting his extended hand.
He pulls you to your feet, and he doesn’t let go of your hand for a moment, big doe eyes widening slightly as he looks at you.
“You…” you trail off, scraping your throat as you look away from his eyes.
It’s all you can do not to get lost in his gaze. 
“I?” he presses, voice low.
“You should dress up too,” you mumble, cheeks burning. “So I’m not alone.”
He lets go of your hand, and your fingers twitch as it falls to your side. When his index finds your chin, you think your blood stops in your veins. He makes you tilt your head back, enough so that you’re forced to meet his gaze.
“I will.” His voice is grave, and you don’t miss the way his eyes dart to your lips once as they part. “I’m going to make this worth it. You deserve it after such a shit day, don’t you?”
You gulp. “Yeah?”
He pats your cheek. “Yeah, you do.”
And then he’s walking away. You’re left standing there, heart racing in your chest, feeling so warm you think you’re about to catch fire. You watch him disappear into his room, and it’s only when he’s out of sight that you manage to move, making your way to your own room.
You shut the door behind you, resting against it as you take deep breaths to calm down. You’re not sure if it’s doing you any good, because this is Jungkook. Jungkook, with his tattoo sleeve and piercings, your older brother’s best friend. Your roommate, the man that’s been playing with you for weeks, for months, like you’re just some playdough. You think he’s doing it on purpose. He has to – he’s trying to make your life miserable because you’re Taehyung’s sister. You don’t see what else it could be. Because why the fuck would Jungkook act like this with you?
You’re not stupid enough to believe it isn’t your fault. Because you were there the night of The Incident, and you reckon things have changed with Jungkook since that night. 
You take a deep, steadying breath before pushing up from the door. No matter what it is that is making Jungkook act like this, you’re still curious to see what he’s preparing for you. Spending time with him like this, with no power and nothing else to do than talk…
Maybe it’s going to help you understand what’s happening in that thick skull of his. So you search for something to wear, something warm since the heating is also down. You settle on brown dress pants that you know make your ass look amazing, and you pair them with a pale beige wool turtleneck. You tuck the shirt in your pants, putting a belt on to make sure it stays in place, and then you take a good look at yourself in your standing mirror. Satisfied with your outfit, you make to move out of your room, but you stop with your hand halfway to the knob.
You can hear Jungkook humming in his room, a soft melody that’s making you think he’s taking a long time in there. Is he actually dressing up? It makes something terribly warm and soft settle in your chest, and you turn back around, grab your makeup pouch and head to your desk.
If this is a date, or whatever it is that Jungkook considers dates to be, you want to look good for it. So you put a little bit of makeup on, trusting your instinct to make it look great even though the light of your small mirror doesn’t turn on since there’s still no power. You hear Jungkook get out of his room before you’re done, and you hope he doesn’t decide to come here.
You doubt he would, but you somehow feel awkward as you’re getting ready. Because he’s your older brother’s best friend, because he’s a college fuckboy, because he’s been making you feel too many things lately – most of them you repress as if your life depends on it. And you think, your life does depend on it. Because nothing can happen between you and Jungkook; you wouldn’t do that to Taehyung. And mostly, you wouldn’t do that to Jungkook, because you know Taehyung would hate him if something did happen.
You sigh. It comes out shakily, a clear indication that you’re growing anxious, and you almost want to laugh at yourself. You want to tell yourself to get a grip, to just play along for things are bound to go back to normality when the power comes back. 
You only stop feeling anxious when Taehyung texts you, your phone lighting up where you’ve put it down on your desk.
[5:02 pm] bröther👽: jk texted me the same thing! Glad u won’t be alone tonight [5:02 pm] You: he’s gonna cook dinner [5:03 pm] bröther👽: lmao, jk doesn’t cook for girls, feel lucky
With that you realize that, indeed, you should feel lucky. Because Jungkook can be a friend, if not anything else. It’s reassuring, and you finish getting ready feeling lighter than you’ve felt all day, as if the hell that today was is all forgotten. 
You spray some perfume on the inside of your wrists, dabbing it on your neck before you finally declare yourself ready to head out of your room. You hope Jungkook won’t make fun of you – he’d be the kind of guy to make fun of you for this, you just know it – and you make your way to the kitchen, where you can hear him busying himself.
He’s brought his portable speaker out of his room. The one that also has a projector in it, and it shines northern lights on the walls and on the ceiling of the kitchen, giving it a cozy atmosphere. No music is playing as of right now, yet Jungkook is still humming, voice low yet melodious.
You rarely hear him sing, but anytime you do, you feel like your ears are blessed by an angel.
He reappears from where he was hidden in the fridge, and his mouth falls open as he catches sight of you. 
He’s wearing a white dress shirt. You think it’s made of linen – it doesn’t look particularly fancy. Yet the way he’s rolled it on his forearms is weirdly attractive, even though he’s only wearing grey sweatpants with it. It’s a look, a look you think only he can pull off. He’s taken the time to style his hair back, and he’s put on earrings you’ve only seen him wear a couple of times during parties.
He eyes you up and down, his doe eyes crinkling in appreciation. “You look good, peach.”
The compliment makes you blush, and you offer him a small smile. He echoes it right away, and he holds up a bottle of rosé that you bought two months ago and forgot all about since then.
“Wine?” you let out as you stop in front of him. You feel awkward because, obviously, it’s wine, but you still hold his gaze as he nods.
“It’s yours but…” He shrugs, glancing at the label. “I figured it’d work well with the chicken.”
You nod once. “Sure, we can drink it.”
It makes him happy. You can see it in the way he beams, and then he puts it down on the counter with the rest of the ingredients. When he moves, you catch a whiff of his cologne, and you feel your cheeks burn again. You glance outside – the rain has stopped, but grey clouds are still looming in the sky as the world slowly darkens. You wonder if they’ll go away some time tonight – without the light pollution, you reckon you’d be able to stargaze.
You end up helping Jungkook with the cooking, chopping some vegetables as he takes care of the meat. You’re not particularly hungry, so you take your time, talking about everything and nothing. Jungkook is good at this, you realize. He’s good at changing your mind, at making sure it doesn’t wander back to your midterm and to the rest of your shitty day. He makes you laugh, cracking stupid jokes whenever you do something, smirking at you when you roll your eyes.
Being with him like this also makes you understand why he’s Taehyung’s friend. He feels more natural this way, less fuckboy-ish, and it’s a side of him you’ve never really seen before.
You sit at the kitchen table, sharing a glass of the rosé wine while the food simmers on the stove. Jungkook’s put on an indie music playlist before you started cooking – something you teased him about. Who knew Jeon Jungkook likes indie music?
“How was Tae before college?” Jungkook asks all of a sudden when there’s a lull in the conversation. “He barely talks about high school.”
You know the exact reason why, and her name is Youna. Taehyung’s ex, his high school sweetheart. The one that moved to the other side of the country without ever once looking back.
“He was an idiot,” you answer, and Jungkook laughs. “No, seriously. He dated the same girl all through high school. Was convinced he was going to marry her.”
“That sounds on brand with Tae,” Jungkook says, nodding his head wisely. “He said that about every girl he’s dated in college, but most of them don’t last more than a few weeks.”
You wince. “Remember Hailey from last semester?”
She lasted about three weeks, but she spent most of those at the apartment. It was the only three weeks where Jungkook and you had talked more than just small talk – or his usual teasing. Mostly because you kept complaining about her, and Jungkook kept saying you were cute when you were mad.
Come to think of it, it still was teasing.
“Fuck, her voice,” Jungkook lets out, shaking his head. “I’m sure she was faking having such a high voice. I don’t know how Taehyung could deal with that.”
It’s your turn to laugh, and Jungkook smiles as he watches you. “I swear to God, I was about to kick Tae out of the apartment,” you say. “I’m glad she didn’t last.”
“Agreed.”
There’s another silence as the song switches on Jungkook’s speaker. You take a sip of wine, appreciating the taste, and Jungkook gets up to check the food on the stove. He comes back a moment later, sitting back next to you.
You think he’s closer. He feels closer, and the smell of his cologne fills your nose again. 
“You put on some cologne,” you state, and it startles you somehow. You weren’t expecting to say that and, clearly, Jungkook wasn’t expecting it either.
“Yeah.” He looks down at himself as if the cologne is visible on him. “Do you like it?”
You gulp. “Yeah, you smell good.”
He smirks, nodding his head. “You too, peach. I love the vanilla scent.”
You don’t know what to do with the compliment. You mutter a thank you before taking a large sip of wine, and Jungkook chuckles before following your lead.
“Do you think Tae and that girl in France will last?” you ask. “He still hasn’t told me who she is.”
Indeed, he’s remained evasive whenever you’ve asked. You stalked the people that are with him on the semester abroad, and you think two of the girls could be your brother’s type, but it’s hard to tell.
“Oh,” Jungkook lets out. He grabs his phone, resting his forearms on the table as he opens it. He goes on Instagram, and as it loads, he glances at you. “He’s told me. Let me show you.”
“What!” you exclaim. “How come he told you and not me?”
Jungkook chuckles. “No idea. But here.”
He shows you the girl’s profile, and you take his phone as you scroll through the pictures. To your surprise, she’s not one of the two girls you stalked. She looks shy, barely showing her face in her pictures, most of them being of nature anyway. Come to think of it, you do get a romantic vibe from her feed, and you reckon that would work well with Taehyung. 
You’re about to give Jungkook his phone back when it vibrates in your hand, a notification appearing at the top. 
[6:05 pm] Shelly 💦🍒: are u gonna be here soon?
It’s not your fault that you read it, and your gaze widens as you look up from the device. Jungkook hasn’t noticed, and he smiles at you, seemingly expectant.
“So?” he asks.
“You had a date tonight?”
His mouth falls open. He looks guilty, eyes widening and taking a sheepish expression. He remains silent, and you can almost see the cogs turning in his head as he thinks of what to answer.
You don’t know how to feel. You feel bad for the girl – Shelly – who’s clearly waiting for Jungkook somewhere. You feel bad that he chose to stay with you because you were upset, but mostly you feel strange that he’s doing all of this for you when there’s someone waiting for him. 
The emojis next to her name are enough of an explanation of what she is to Jungkook. Still, you feel increasingly uncomfortable, even more so as he says nothing.
“What the fuck, JK?”
“She’s no one,” he says when you get up. “Trust me, I’ve only hung out with her a couple of times.”
You laugh, and it’s somehow void of joy. “Why would I care?”
He looks at the glasses of wine, and then at the food on the stove. “I don’t know… because we’re…” He motions between you, and then at said glasses of wine and food. “I just forgot to tell her I wasn’t going to come over.”
It’s enough of a reminder that Jungkook, for all his current kindness, is a renowned college fuckboy. It reminds you of all the times you’ve heard him fuck – was Shelly one of the girls? You feel disgusted, and you walk out of the kitchen, not wanting to look at Jungkook right now.
“Peach,” he says as he follows you out in the darkness of the living room.
The living room is also strangely cold, and you shiver as you turn towards him. “What?”
“I’m sorry,” he apologizes. “But why are you even reacting like this?”
You scoff. “I don’t know, Jungkook, you tell me.”
You can’t see his expression. But when he takes a step closer to you, you feel the heat of his body radiating in the space between you.
“Are you jealous?” he asks, and you hear the smirk in his voice.
“No,” you say, and you scoff again. “I’m weirded out.”
“Because I was going to fuck someone tonight?” It’s his turn to scoff when you remain silent. “Weren’t you going to fuck that dude? Hoseok?”
You don’t know how he remembers Hoseok’s name, but he’s got a point. You wet your lips, tongue poking your cheek next. “Right.”
“Come on, peach, just come back in the kitchen,” he says. He grabs your hand, and your breath gets caught in your throat as he escorts you back to the chair where you were sitting. You begrudgingly follow, and when you’re seated he towers over you.
You tilt your head back. “What?”
He flicks your nose, and you dodge a second too late. “You’re cute when you’re jealous.”
“Fuck off,” you grumble. “I wasn’t jealous I was just weirded out.”
He smiles at you wickedly. “Of course, peach. Of course.”
He sounds so cocky you want to hate him, but all you can do is glare at the table. He pushes your wine glass towards you as he sits back next to you and you wordlessly take it to chug it.
“Now that that’s done,” he says once you’ve put it back on the table, “what do you think of Tae’s girl?”
You had all but forgotten why you were holding Jungkook’s phone in the first place. You recall her Instagram to the forefront of your mind, pursing your lips. 
“She looks chill,” you answer.
Jungkook pouts. “Just that?”
You shrug. “What else am I supposed to say?”
“Well,” Jungkook starts. “For one I can’t believe she’s Tae’s type. She looks nothing like the girls he dated here. Like just think about Hailey?”
You just nod, because in truth you fully agree with him. 
“Her Instagram is a vibe though,” Jungkook continues. “Tae is big on vibes so… maybe it works?”
You nod once more, tilting your head to the side as you really think about it. Because frankly you’d like for Taehyung to find someone that lasts. As much as you know he’s been having fun in college, you know his happiness usually lies in a healthy relationship like the one he had with his ex. 
“Hopefully it does,” you finally say. “Tae deserves it.”
Jungkook looks at you, somber expression on his features as he plays with his piercing. It makes your heart cease in your chest, and you busy yourself with refilling the wine glasses as he remains silent.
“He does,” Jungkook eventually replies. “He actually really does.”
He sounds so serious you throw him a questioning glance. “Yeah?”
He blinks once, as if stepping out of a daze before flashing his infuriating smirk at you again. “Definitely.”
There’s an awkward silence, and you watch as he takes a sip of wine before getting up to check on the food. He deems it ready, and makes two bowls, one for you and one for him. He sets yours in front of you, a proud smile on his lips.
“Smells good,” you compliment him as he sits.
He winks at you. “Wait till you taste.”
You have to resist the urge to roll your eyes, and you take a tentative bite, holding his gaze as he expectantly waits.
“Shit,” you let out, and you fan your mouth with your hand. “Why is it so spicy?”
“Don’t tell me you’re like your brother and can’t stand spicy food,” he complains as you take a long sip of wine.
You put your wine glass back down, wincing as it clinks against the bowl. It fortunately doesn’t break, and you push it away from the dish as you chuckle. “What’s wrong with not liking spicy food?”
He pouts. “You guys are so weak.”
You fake-glare at him. “This shit is so spicy it would wake the dead.”
He snorts, stifling his laugh until you meet his gaze and you burst out laughing at the same time. You think it’s the first time you’ve ever heard him guffaw like this. His laugh is contagious, pretty, and you’re convinced it can have healing effects.
You’re convinced it has healing effects. Indeed, in that instant, you finally really forget about the day, the heaviness it left behind dwindling into nothingness. It’s replaced with happiness, and chatter with Jungkook becomes easier, more natural. 
You realize he smiles a lot. You make him laugh a lot too, and whenever he does you feel your heart flutter in your chest. You don’t like the feeling, know it’s a mistake, but with the wine, all you can do is try to make him laugh some more, and smile whenever he does.
You’re on your first beer after finishing the wine – and the overly spicy food, which Jungkook congratulated you profusely for finishing. You’ve talked about every subject that’s come to your mind so far, none feeling taboo with Jungkook. He eventually tells you about Shelly – she is indeed one of the girls you’ve heard him sleep with – and you laugh as he admits he’s really happy he didn’t have to see her tonight.
You can’t help but snort. “Jeon Jungkook, saying no to sex? I’ve heard everything.”
“Bruh.” He laughs, shaking his head. “Is your opinion of me so low you think sex is the most important thing to me?”
His eyes are gleaming with mischief in the light of his speaker, which will apparently run out of battery soon. You both don’t care, and you’ve lit a candle in case it does die. Its sweet fragrance has been chasing the smell of the food away, and it’s been giving the kitchen a homey vibe, even as it’s growing chilly.
“Is it not?” you tease.
He rolls his eyes, shaking his head at you. “Not at all.”
You throw him a no-bullshit look that makes him frown cutely. 
“How long can you go without having sex?” you ask him, holding in a laugh.
He narrows his doe eyes at you. “At least a few weeks.”
“A few weeks? That’s nothing!”
“Yah,” he bursts, and he laughs as you snort. “Peach, just because I have casual sex doesn’t mean I can’t stop if I want to.”
“Then stop,” you challenge him.
He cocks an eyebrow. “Give me one reason why I should.”
“To prove a point?”
His eyes narrow further, but if you’ve understood one thing about Jeon Jungkook, it’s that he doesn’t step down from a challenge. No, as competitive as he is, you’re pretty sure he’ll do it.
“Peach,” he purrs, and it has something warm form in the pit of your stomach. “Is it really about me proving a point, or is it about you being jealous?”
You choke on the sip of beer you were taking, which only makes him laugh. You think it’s a little condescending, but you know he doesn’t mean it in a bad way. You still punch him in the shoulder for it, unable to resist.
“Why would I be jealous?” you ask. “Hobi fucks me good.”
Jungkook shuts his eyes and his nose scrunches. He shakes his head once before looking at you again. “I didn’t want to know that.”
You smile as if you’ve never done anything wrong in your whole life. “Your loss.”
He laughs at that, gaze dropping to the table. Silence grows between you, but it’s comfortable, not like what silence with Hoseok feels like. With Hoseok you feel the need to speak whenever there’s a lull in the conversation but, right now, you’re content with just sitting back in your chair, sipping on your beer.
To your surprise, Jungkook starts singing over the song, gaze lost in his own glass of beer. His voice settles deep inside of you, resonating in your soul, and you just look at him, awe clouding your mind.
You’re not sure he’s realized he’s singing. Because when he meets your gaze, he lets out a small laugh. “Why are you looking at me like this?”
“You have a beautiful voice,” you whisper.
It’s hard to tell in the dim light, but you’re pretty sure his cheeks have turned pink. “Nah.”
“No, I’m serious,” you insist. “I often hear you hum and… you sing really well.”
His nose scrunches up again. “Stop it.”
“Just take the compliment,” you say, laughing as he plays with his piercing.
You reckon it might be the first time in your life you’ve ever seen Jeon Jungkook shy. Because he clearly is, and he looks away from you, running his hand through his hair. It undoes the hairstyle, and a strand falls on his forehead.
You’ve never felt such a visceral need to brush your hand through someone’s hair before. You manage to resist, busying yourself with holding your beer instead.
“M’kay,” he lets out. “Thanks, peach.”
His voice is soft. Softer than the fur of a puppy, and it makes the warm thing in you grow. You gulp, wetting your lips. You don’t miss the way his eyes glance at your mouth, and he looks conflicted for half a second before he smirks again.
“We should have hung out like this before,” he declares.
“Yeah?” is all you can answer.
You feel yourself leaning in. You haven’t even realized how close you’re sitting to him until you’re leaning in. He does too. He leans forward, tilting his head to the side slightly. He looks surprised, even more so when one of your hands finds the back of his neck, pulling him closer until you’ve erased the distance between you.
You both didn’t close your eyes. And you both look startled from your lips touching, so much so that you let go of him, straightening away from him. He, on the other hand, hasn’t moved, and his gaze goes fully serious before he grabs your arm gently, pulling you closer to him again.
This time, when your mouths meet, you shut your eyes, sighing softly as he kisses you. His piercings press into your lower lip, and as his mouth moves against you, you feel the warm thing inside of you grow so big it bursts. It bursts the same way fireworks do – in an explosion of colours that leaves you waiting for more.
He doesn’t disappoint. He tilts his head to the side, deepening the kiss. His hand on your arm moves up until it rests on your shoulder before he decides better and moves it to the side of your neck. His thumb swipes at your jaw, gently, and it’s his turn to sigh in the kiss.
When his tongue darts out of his mouth, you meet it with your own. For a reason unknown, you expect it to make you both grow horny, but the kiss remains soft, slow like you have all of eternity stretched out in front of you.
Even though it’s languid, even though it’s soft, you grow dizzy, head spinning as you taste the beer in Jungkook’s mouth. As his hand moves to the nape of your neck, pulling you closer. You rest one hand on his chest, right above his heart, and you feel the organ racing under your fingers. It makes you grab a handful of fabric as if that will anchor you in the present.
As if that will make you forget that you’re kissing your brother’s best friend. 
It does, though you reckon it might be the way Jungkook shifts in his chair, moving so that you can straddle him. And he pulls you in, softly, tugging on your arm until you let go of the shirt and drape it over his shoulder. You sit on him, legs on each side of him, your toes barely even touching the floor. Still, your mouths move in unison, his lips petal soft against yours. 
Your other arm circles his neck too, until you’re holding him against you. His large hands land on your waist, gently, and his thumbs stroke you, barely even grazing you over the thick fabric of your wool turtleneck.
You don’t know how long you kiss. It just seems like you both don’t want to stop, like you both know the moment you stop will be a wake-up call, one you’d rather avoid while you get stuck in this bubble of eternity with him. The fireworks keep on shining bright, warm summer sun blooming in your heart as if this, this was always meant to be.
Oxygen is futile when you’re kissing Jeon Jungkook. Not needed, as if he breathes air into your lungs. You think he does, and you sigh once more as your hands get lost in the hair on the back of his head.
The next swipe of his tongue is sharper, carries more intent, and you both startle, finally parting from each other. Though you remain a hairsbreadth away, longing for his lips the moment your mouths aren’t connected anymore.
Immobile, you breathe in shakily, and you hear him do it too. He’s still stroking you, gently, and he wraps his arms around your waist to pull you in. You rest your head on his shoulder, breathing in the clean laundry smell of his shirt, along with the scent of his cologne as you turn your face towards his neck.
The moment stretches some more, as you listen to the music. His grip around you loosens as you press a soft kiss on the mole you’ve discovered on his neck. He pushes you back, gently, until your back is against the table. Your gazes meet then, and you wonder if his eyes always shine like this. Do they always hold the light of the universe in them, or did you set fire to his gaze?
He gulps and his mouth falls open. His pupils fill with something you can’t quite put your finger on, yet it has clouds taking over the summer sun in your heart until the beating organ goes cold.
“Now you’ve had a fake Valentine’s Day kiss,” he murmurs, and the fireworks burst into a void that tastes like ash as you interpret his gaze.
He’s regretting this. It takes over all of his features, turning his big doe eyes into hearths of remorse. It finishes dousing the sun in your heart until the star goes to sleep, and all that’s left is the echoes of what once was.
“Fake?” is all you manage to let out.
He shuts his eyes, eyelids fluttering close softly. He looks like an angel repenting as he rests his forehead against yours, forcing your own eyes shut from the proximity.
“We shouldn’t be doing this,” he reminds you, reality sinking into his words. 
You nod against him before pulling away. You try to get up, but his hands on your waist hold you in place.
“Let me go,” you whisper. 
He does so, albeit reluctantly, arms falling to his sides in a defeated manner. You try to not let yourself think about it too much, try to forget what just happened as you stand up, moving away from him.
Without his body heat you shiver, and you hate yourself for the next words you say.
“We should share a room tonight. It’s going to be cold.”
His eyes shoot open as he turns his head towards you, surprise replacing the reality. As if he thought he ruined everything, and you think maybe he did. Maybe he did ruin everything, but you don’t even want to be thinking about it right now. You just want to go to sleep, to let the night pass.
Maybe the insanity will go with it.
“Are you sure?” he asks.
You shrug your shoulders. “You know, Taehyung doesn’t have to know everything.”
Jungkook slowly gets up, facing you. You gulp as he pushes a strand of hair behind your ear, hand going to your chin again. He leans in, forcing you to tilt your head back until his lips find yours again.
It lasts a fraction of a second, yet it leaves you scrambling for breath as he takes a step back. He nods as you meet his gaze, an eyebrow cocked in question.
“We can sleep in your room,” he says. “It’s smaller, it’s going to be easier to keep it warm.”
Right as he finishes his sentence the battery of his speaker dies, and silence surrounds you as the northern lights go to sleep. The light flickers in time with the flame of the candle, and you glance at it.
“Sounds good,” you agree, and you wet your lips as you look at him again. His big doe eyes still shine even with just the candlelight, and you wish the world was different. Wish that he wasn’t Tae’s friend, that you could just grab him and have him kiss you stupid again. But he’s right. You shouldn’t be doing this.
Sharing a bed is only practical. Only because it’s cold, and you have to survive the night. A voice at the very back of your mind tells you that you could head over to the dorms, but you don’t want to.
You want to remain here, in this instant outside of the linear timeline of your life.
“Maybe you should get your bed covers?” you suggest. “So we don’t get cold.”
He smiles, so far from his usual smirk and grin that you feel a pang in your chest. “Yeah. Yes, that’s a good idea.”
All of five minutes later, he meets you in your room. You’ve changed into your previous outfit, and he’s swiped his dress shirt for an oversized white Nike t-shirt. He’s holding his bed cover to his chest, just a white bundle that he offers you as if he’s trying to make peace with you. You motion to your bed, and he nods before walking over to it.
You shut the door behind him, turning to look at him as he debates for a few seconds where to sleep in your bed. He starts by putting his bed cover over yours and then chooses to sit at the foot of the bed, on the side that’s against the wall.
He then turns to meet your gaze, his profile cast in the flickering light of the candle from the kitchen and the few others you’ve lit while waiting for him.
“I think this is the first time I’ve been in this room since Jimin moved out,” he tells you, and his lips stretch into that same soft smile.
You glance around, pursing your lips. “Hope it doesn’t disappoint.”
“It doesn’t,” he reassures you as he imitates your action, observing your room. “It feels like you.”
Not knowing what’s that supposed to mean, you cock an eyebrow. “Does it?”
“Yeah.”
He doesn’t explain further, and you shrug it off as you move closer to your bed to sit on the edge. The moment you’re in his vicinity your heart picks up in your chest. It’s hard to believe that Jeon Jungkook is in your bed right now, and you have to remind yourself that it’s purely because it currently is freezing in your apartment. 
“Should we…” you trail off, motioning at the bed.
He chuckles, a sweet sound that forces you to gaze at him, eyes widening as your heartbeat picks up even more. “You want me in your bed so bad, do you?”
You short-circuit, flushing fully red as you struggle to find something witty to reply with. Falling short on words, you end up shrugging your shoulders as you move under the covers, hoping he won’t tease you further. 
You highly doubt you’d survive him teasing you more.
To your relief, Jungkook ends up chuckling again, but he remains silent as he slides in next to you, keeping a safe distance between the two of you. You lie on your back, while he turns to face you, and you feel the weight of his gaze on your profile.
It makes you turn to look at him, and he offers you the same kind smile.
“Shouldn’t we blow the candles out?” he asks, and his gaze darts to where you’ve left the candles on your desk and night table. “Just to make sure we don’t burn the building down.”
“You want to go to sleep right away?”
You hate yourself for saying that. Indeed, a smirk grows on his lips and he jumps on the occasion to say, “You want to do something else?”
Something grows hot inside of you, and it’s not that same summer sun he ignited in you earlier. You wet your lips, burning from the inside out as you remind him, “We shouldn’t.”
He chuckles again. “Didn’t you say he doesn’t need to know?”
You meet his gaze, find the mischief behind his big doe eyes and roll yours. “You’re annoying.”
Right on cue you shiver. It takes you by surprise, because you feel your insides burning, yet the temperature in your room is low, winning against the warmth.
“Are you cold?” he asks, no traces of mischief left in his eyes. Only concern can be found in his pupils, and you want to hate him for it.
“A little,” you admit. “The covers are just cold.”
They actually are, as your bodies have yet to warm them. To your surprise, Jungkook sidles closer to you. 
“I can hold you, if you want. I’m always too hot.”
You burn a thousand shades of red as you wet your lips. “You don’t have to.”
“Come on, peach, I won’t let you freeze while I’m right here.”
Yet he doesn’t do anything, waits until you’ve nodded your head to slide even closer, and he loosely wraps his arm around your waist. His warm breath fans the side of your face, and you do your best to ignore it.
“Better?” he asks, voice low as he whispers in your ear.
You shut your eyes as electricity courses through your whole body. “Yeah.”
“Good.”
Your brain zeroes in on the weight of his arm on you, and when his fingers start tracing random figures on your waist, you let out a small yelp.
“That tickles,” you tell him.
He does it again, and you try to push him away. Only, Jungkook is far stronger than you, and all you manage to do is end up with your back against him as he holds you firmly to him.
“Stop,” you beg, a little breathlessly.
“It’s warming you up, is it not?”
You roll your eyes, though you reckon it is. You don’t feel nearly as cold anymore, and you can feel the heat growing in you again. As an attempt to get away from him, you shuffle, and it earns you a breathless chuckle from him.
Just to make sure you didn’t imagine the whole thing, you move your hips again. Something twitches in his sweatpants and your mouth falls open.
“You’re…”
“Consequences of the position,” he’s quick to say. “Don’t worry about it.”
You don’t know how you possibly can not worry about it. It’s all your brain can focus on as you shift again, and this time he hisses.
“Maybe you should not do that.” His voice is low, husky, and it sends shivers all over your body. 
You bite your lips. “Why?”
He pulls you back in, flush against his chest. His lips ghost on the side of your neck, and you think you’ve been struck with lightning. “Because we can’t do anything about it.”
“Right.”
He rests his head on the pillow behind you again, sighing deeply. His hand holds you against him, forcing you to feel every inch of his hard body pressing into you.
Of his hard dick too, where it pushes into your ass.
“Maybe we should go to sleep,” you say, eyes fluttering shut.
He nods. “We should.”
“I need to blow out the candles.”
His arm loosens around you before he fully lets you go. You prop yourself on an elbow, leaning towards the night table. You blow out the candle you’ve left there, and before you can move you feel Jungkook’s palm resting on your hip.
“Shit, peach,” he whispers.
You look behind yourself. Your position is explicit, as if you’re angling yourself to fuck yourself on him better. It makes you move your hips, and you see the moment something snaps inside of him.
“Why don’t you lie down next to me before we blow the rest of the candles out?”
There’s something stern, authoritative in his voice, and you immediately obey him. 
“On your back,” he adds.
You exhale shakily as you turn, not daring to disobey. His hand lands flat on your stomach, and he starts drawing circles around your navel. You inhale sharply as he nudges your cheek with his nose.
“You look stressed.”
“What are you doing?”
You hear the smirk in his voice when he says, “Helping you fall asleep?”
“Jungkook…”
“Peach.”
You fall silent as he keeps tracing circles. He sighs next to you, almost longingly and he rests his forehead against your temple. His lips are so close you think you feel their softness on your cheek.
“You’re driving me crazy,” he whispers. His fingers still on you, under your navel. Some inch or so over the band of your sweatpants and he pushes your shirt up before resuming his actions directly on your skin.
“We really shouldn’t…” you trail off.
“Are you going to be able to sleep?” he asks.
It’s rhetorical – he knows just as well as you that you won’t. “No.”
“It could help you sleep.”
You don’t want to know what the ‘it’ refers to. “Yeah?”
He wets his lips, or maybe he plays with his piercing. But from the proximity, you feel his tongue and you think you’re going to die right then and there.
“Doesn’t it help you sleep when you touch yourself?”
You’re soaking your panties. You’re burning up, caught on fire by every strike of lightning that Jungkook’s words ignite in you.
“Does it help you?” you counter-back, remembering when you heard him watching porn two weeks ago.
“It does. Always sleep soundly after.”
You slowly nod, gulping as his lips close on your jaw, and he sucks gently. 
He’s danger in human form. And he knows what he’s doing, he knows how to weave words to cause your undoing. You think he’s already started weeks ago, the night of the Incident. 
Taehyung is miles away from your thoughts when you say, “You want to touch me?”
He smirks against you, licks at the spot he just sucked on. “Why don’t you show me how you touch yourself?”
He moves his hand away from your stomach, and you moan softly when he parts your thighs open, resting his palm on the one closest to him as he presses it against his hard dick.
“Shit, Jungkook.”
“I know.”
You hate him. You hate him so much you slide your hand between your legs, pressing a circle on your clit.
“Good girl.”
You moan again, yet you stop your ministrations on yourself. “I want to watch you touch yourself too.”
He grunts, grinds his dick in the side of your thigh once more. “You want to see me come?”
“Want you to finger me with your cum.”
You’ve gone insane. You think there’s an asylum out there for you, yet Jungkook only chuckles manly against your jaw. “Peach, I won’t touch you tonight.” You whine, and he sucks on your jaw again. “You can do it yourself.”
He’s mad. So are you, and you untie the knot of your sweatpants so you can slide your hand in. You moan softly as you find your clit, and you dip two fingers inside of yourself before moving back to the bundle of nerves.
“Jerk yourself off,” you tell him. You try to sound commanding, dominant, but your voice is whiny. It earns you a smirk from him as he turns on his back. He takes off his pants and underwear, clearly not as shy as you. You can’t see his dick when you look down as he’s still under the covers, and you gulp as you imagine it.
Feeling bold, you push the covers off, needing to see him. And the sight doesn’t disappoint. His dick is large. Not excessively long, but the girth makes you understand why he’s got girls screaming whenever he fucks them. His tip is glistening with precum, and he runs his thumb on the slit before spreading the precum on his shaft. Large veins run along the length, from base to top, and you’re struck thinking he’s got the prettiest cock you’ve seen in your life.
“Like what you see?” he teases as he strokes his dick once, slowly but with a firm grip.
“Do you want to see me too?”
You really are bold. Far bolder than you’ve ever been with anyone before. Maybe because all of tonight Jungkook has put you at ease, and you think there’s nothing embarrassing about finally living out your fantasy. Especially not when he’s so pliable to it, willing to follow you into the land of insanity.
Scratch that – he’s the one leading to madness.
“It’s only fair if I see you too, no?” he teases with a smirk on his lips as he looks at you with his dark, intense gaze.
“Yeah.”
It’s all you say before you shimmy out of your pants. You don’t miss the way his eyes go to your hip, where you have a large dragon tattoo. He curses under his breath. “Didn’t know you were tatted.”
“Got it last semester,” you answer with a shaky voice.
He smirks up at you. “Hot.”
You gulp, unable to hold his gaze for longer than a few seconds. Shier than him, you keep the panties on. To your surprise, he sits up, runs his hand on the inside of your thigh before he lies down on the other side so he has a view of between your legs. His feet are next to your head, and you angle yourself away from them so that they aren’t in your face anymore.
“Touch yourself, peach.”
You nod, and you draw circles on your clit through the fabric of your underwear. It’s a plain black thong, yet you feel immensely sexy when Jungkook’s doe eyes narrow dangerously as he watches you touching yourself, stroking his dick lazily.
You watch how he touches himself, heart beating out of your chest. You’re on fire, a wildfire raging through you, and you moan softly as you press harder into you.
“Why don’t you touch yourself under your panties, mmh?” he asks, gaze sliding up to meet yours before he goes back between your legs. “Won’t it feel better?”
You can’t resist him. You push your panties to the side, holding them with one hand as you go back to your clit. Your thighs instinctively want to close together, but he holds them open.
“Put your fingers in.”
You do. You push two digits in, arching them as you rub at the sweet spot inside of you. He watches, licking his lips as he increases the pace on his dick. You moan right as he grunts, the sound making shivers course up and down your spine.
“Why don’t you use your vibrator instead?”
You entirely stop moving, digits deep inside of you. “Huh?”
“I’ve heard you use a vibrator,” he explains. “I want to see you bury it in your tight little pussy.”
Your walls clench around your fingers at his crude words, and it doesn’t take any more for you to roll towards your night table so you can grab said vibrator. When you’re settled back in your previous position, you click it on, and the soft buzzing fills your room.
“Wait,” Jungkook says, stopping you before you’ve pushed your panties aside again. “Take this off.”
He pinches the fabric on your hip, over the tattoo, and all you can do is nod once before you do. He licks his lips, looking at you appreciatively through half-lidded eyes. He looks between your legs, where you just know he can see your juices glistening. Before he says anything else, you put the vibrator on your clit, legs twitching as harsh pleasure courses through you.
To your surprise, he moans, a low sound that has your pussy clench hard. Of course he sees, and he’s quick to say, “Put it in, peach.”
You obey, and you let out a breathy sound as you immediately rub your clit with your other hand. The next few minutes are a world of bliss, of pleasure and of Jungkook’s praises and grunts, entwined with your moans. You think your room is burning hot, or maybe it’s just his eyes on you. His balls are tight as he jerks off harder, faster, eyes never once moving away from the spot between your legs, where your vibrator makes squelching sounds as you push it in and out of you.
“You’re doing so well,” Jungkook tells you after you’ve moaned loudly. 
You’re nearing your high, but for some reason, you haven’t been able to hit it yet. His words bring you closer, yet it remains just barely out of touch.
“So fucking well,” he adds, breathlessly, and you notice he’s gripping his dick harder, moving so fast you barely can see his hand, except when it slows on his head with a flick of his wrist. He moans, grunts loudly. “You’re so hot, I’m going to come.”
“Fuck,” you curse as you watch him push his shirt up, and you catch sight of his defined muscles. They contract as he jerks himself off, and you think you’re drooling.
Maybe because you’re so close to hitting an orgasm that you can’t do anything other than drool.
He glances at your face once. You meet his gaze, blood boiling as you see his eyebrows almost touching over his eyes, his mouth slightly agape as he breathes loudly. His eyelids flutter close as his eyebrows bunch up over his eyes even more, and then he moans out something that sounds like your name.
Not ‘peach’. Your full name. It makes your eyes water as you observe him, as you watch how he looks in pain. And then he curses, and your eyes fall to his dick to see white spurts of cum coming out, covering the tattoos on the back of his hand as he keeps moving, never once faltering.
Your walls clench tightly around your vibrator. You think you’re about to come, but the orgasm doesn’t want to hit, evading you frustratingly. Your motions grow inconsistent, the push and the pull of the vibrator clearly not enough for you.
As Jungkook comes down from his high, he surveys you once more, features blissed out from coming. He watches you struggle as his hand stops at the base of his dick.
“Look at the mess I made because of you,” he says, and you moan. He tilts his head to the side, pulls at his piercing, and then stops you. Puts his hand over yours between your legs as the vibrator rests deep inside of you. “Do you need help?”
You feel some of his cum as it spills from his hand to yours. You keep rubbing on your clit, meeting his gaze as he awaits your answer. “Yes.”
He smirks, and you let him grab your vibrator. He pulls it out of you, watches your juice on it with a hungry look on his features before he hands it to you again. “Put this on your clit.”
You obey, and you sigh in pleasure as he covers two of his fingers with his cum, even picking some up where it fell on his abdomen, decorating his defined abs. You know exactly what he’s going to do before he does, and it makes you curse.
He meets your gaze. “Are you on the pill?”
“IUD.”
He smirks. “Good girl.”
And then he pushes his cum-covered fingers inside of you, arching them to expertly play with your g-spot. You cry out, throwing your head back in pleasure. He fucks you with his digits for a while, and you press your vibrator hard on your clit, as if it’s going to make you come faster.
All it does is make you close your thighs on his wrist. He pulls his fingers out, forces you to spread your legs wide open again, and then circles your entrance with one finger.
“It’s so hot, to watch my cum dripping out of you.”
His digits are in again before you can reply, and he fucks you so well, you crash right into your orgasm, walls spasming around his fingers. You moan, loudly so, and tears prick at your eyes as the waves of your orgasm drown everything in you, making you shake with pleasure.
You ride the high for a long time. Longer than you’ve ever had before, and Jungkook whispers filthy praises to you all through it, until you cringe with oversensitivity and turn off the vibrator. You put it down next to you, and Jungkook pushes in and out twice more before he pulls his fingers out of you.
You remain silent for a while, both of you regaining your breath. Once you stop feeling like you’re seconds away from passing out, you prop yourself on your elbows, watching him. He’s still looking between your legs, and you instinctively close them.
His eyes shoot to your face, and he smirks. “You have no idea how hot you are with my cum dripping out of you, peach.”
You bite your lip, so hard you think you taste blood. “Shit.”
“I know.”
“What did we do?”
He shrugs, sucking on his piercing. “We made sure we’ll sleep well, that’s all.”
You sigh, nodding once before you lie back down on the bed. “Shit,” you repeat.
This time he laughs. It’s a soft sound, something that makes your heart squeeze in your chest. For some reason, it reminds you of the kiss in the kitchen, and butterflies flutter in your stomach.
Even more so as he says, “Let me go get something to clean you up with.”
He pulls his boxers up and then gets up. You miss the way he winces as his feet hit the cold floor, and he’s back with a washcloth before you’ve had time to realize he was gone.
“I’m sorry, there was no hot water left.”
“Oh,” you let out.
He chuckles as he sits next to you. “Do you want to do it or…?”
You nod, and you grab the washcloth out of his hands before cleaning yourself up. It really is cold, and you wince, one eye shutting as you make sure you’re clean before handing it back to him.
“What do you want me to do with this?” he asks, a teasing tone in his voice.
“I don’t know?” 
He laughs, still grabbing it before throwing it in your hamper. “Did you want to pee before going to bed?”
You nod again. “I should.”
“Are you okay to get there?”
You roll your eyes, finally finding some of your usual defiance. “You didn’t fuck me, Jungkook, I can still use my legs.”
“Right,” he lets out before chuckling. “I’ll wait for you here then.”
The trip to the bathroom is the worst you’ve ever experienced, with how cold it is in the rest of the apartment. You’re pleased that your room is warm when you come back, and your heart squeezes in your chest as you see Jungkook lying on his side, looking at you as you enter and shut the door behind you.
He smiles warmly at you. “Better?”
“Why is it so cold?” you complain, which makes him laugh that cute, giggly laugh of his. You immediately look away from him, not wanting him to see the blush on your cheeks.
You blow the rest of the candles out, and in the dark, you make your way to your bed. You slide under the covers, sighing at how warm they are now.
“I’m glad you stayed,” Jungkook says as you settle next to him.
You gulp. “What?”
“You said you were going to go to the dorms,” he reminds you, even though that was an eternity ago. “I’m glad you didn’t.”
“Oh,” you let out. You’re happy it’s dark because your cheeks burn so much you imagine you’ve turned purple. “I’m glad I stayed too.”
He sighs, and you feel the mattress move as he shifts. “Do you want to cuddle?” he asks. “For warmth.”
You snort, and even though you’re in the dark, you nod. 
“Sure.”
A few seconds later, you’re the small spoon again, and he holds you close to him. He sighs once more, and it ends with a yawn that has you laugh softly.
“Tired?” you tease him.
“Yeah.” He chuckles, nuzzling his face in your hair. “I’m going to sleep like a rock.”
So are you. Even if you shouldn’t, even if you and Jungkook probably committed a big mistake tonight, you still know you’re going to sleep soundly.
Especially as his breathing evens out behind you, interrupted by soft snores here and there. It forms a melody that lulls you to the land of dreams, to a land where you can forget that he’s Taehyung’s best friend, and where you can imagine that he’s yours after all. It’s idyllic, unreal, yet your sleeping form clings to it like it’s a lifeline in a storm.
You just know that reality is bound to hit again soon.
Prev | Chapter 3.5 | Next
☆☆☆☆☆
Oooooof yep. They really did that hehehe. What did you guys think? Did you like it? Let me know!!
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nadvs · 4 months ago
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can i request for the swte universe in their college days, reader seems like a perfectionist to me so what if she failed on an exam or she didn't get there in time and she failed her class and she got really upset, feeling terrible about herself, very disappointed and rafe tries to uplift her mood, trying to get her out of her dorm room?🤍🤍🤍
omg yessss i always love your prompts 🥹
based on this fic
» au masterlist
she had a bad feeling about the midterm. sometimes she could tell when she was being too hard on herself, when she was catastrophizing, but she knew she wasn’t exaggerating when she told rafe that her mind went blank during the test and that she’s sure she failed.
now, as she sits in her dorm checking her grade on her laptop the night after, she gets the confirmation.
she texts her boyfriend, just like she did when they were best friends and told each other everything. i was right.
her phone starts buzzing with a phone call.
“you okay?” he says when she picks up. he remembers that her grade was supposed to be posted tonight.
“no,” she says with a defeated laugh.
rafe is with the guys, watching a game at the house. he stands up off the couch, holding his phone to his ear. one of his housemates points to the screen, eyebrow raised, clearly confused why rafe would leave when there’s a minute left in an intense game.
but he ignores him, rounding the corner to pace into the hallway. he leans back against a wall, arm crossed over his chest.
“how bad is it?” he asks.
“so bad that i’m working on an email to my prof to ask if i can retake it or do anything for extra credit,” she says. “i didn’t even pass.”
he can hear the panic in her voice. rafe chews on his thumbnail as he stares down at the floor.
“it’s not over,” he says. he realizes he sounds just like he does when he’s trying to motivate his teammates between periods during a rough game. he rethinks his approach. this isn’t a game. this is his girl. and she’s freaked out about her future.
“baby, it happens,” he says. “everyone fails at some point.”
“this is so bad,” she mumbles. “i’m so stupid.”
he grimaces. they’re basically the same person. he knows how much pressure she puts on herself. sometimes, he’s almost certain that she thinks she has to be perfect to be worth something, just like he does.
“where are you?” he asks.
“home.” her inhale is shaky. “i shouldn’t have stayed up late studying so much. i thought it’d be better to learn what i could, but running on barely any sleep must’ve messed me up.”
“send the email,” he says. “and be ready in half an hour, okay?”
she’s quiet for a moment.
“why?”
“because i know you’re gonna sit in your room all night, beating yourself up, thinking about what you should’ve done and there’s no point to any of it,” he says. “just be ready, alright?”
moments like these, she’s glad her boyfriend is so bossy and decisive. her head is such a mess right now, somehow feeling both chaotic and blank at the same time.
rafe texts when he arrives. when she settles in his passenger seat, he can see that she’s been crying. he shuts off his music and gently pulls her in, his palm at the back of her neck, so that she’ll nuzzle into his chest.
it’s his go-to move when she’s upset. it always works. after crying against him for a moment, her breaths start to even out.
he kisses her forehead, his hand running up and down her back. he hates this feeling, when she’s so stressed out and he’s utterly powerless.
“you’re not stupid,” he mumbles against her hair.
“i am. i’m so disappointed in myself,” she says, her voice brittle. “how could i fuck up this bad?”
he frowns. he knows her well enough by now. sometimes she needs tough love. sometimes it’s the only thing that’ll pull her out of her haze.
“it happened,” he says. he pulls back just enough so she can look up at him. “can you change that it happened?”
“no.”
“is calling yourself stupid going to fix it?”
“no.”
“that’s my girl you’re talking to,” he says, his blue eyes sweeping over her face in worry. “my girl isn’t stupid.”
her lips twist in sorrow, but she nods, eyelids fluttering. she spirals sometimes. she can tell she’s doing it right now.
rafe’s hand rests on her damp cheek, rubbing his thumb over her skin.
“you anxious?” he asks.
“very,” she replies.
so, he decides to see if his most effective way of cooling down when he’s wired will help her.
he pulls into a lot by an outdoor court he always sees on his drive to her campus and takes the basketball out of his trunk when he parks.
“this is kind of unfair,” she says lightheartedly when she gets out of his car into the cool night air. “no chance i’m winning a one-on-one against you.”
“we’re just shooting hoops,” he says, putting an arm around her as he holds the ball to his chest.
the court is empty and quiet and dimly lit. they stand below one of the nets, bouncing the ball back and forth between each other.
“what if i fail the course?” she says.
“you won’t.”
“but if i do?”
“if you do, you’ll survive,” rafe replies. “you think some class can take you down?”
she breathes a chuckle. when she gets the ball back, she holds it, standing across from him, staring. all they ever are with each other is honest. it’s how it’s always been.
“i’m scared,” she admits. “i’m scared this will throw off my timing and i won’t graduate when i want to.”
“baby, there’s no way that’s happening,” he says confidently. “one bad grade won’t do that.”
“you seem so sure,” she states. she bounces the ball back to him.
“here. if i make this, it means you’ll fail the course.”
he takes the ball in both hands, holds it over his head, and throws it so it hits the rim hard, making the whole backboard shake as the ball goes flying down the court.
“i think that was rigged,” she says, the ache in her chest loosening as she laughs.
“we’ll never know,” rafe half-shouts as he runs to pick up the ball. he bounces it back to her.
she dribbles it a few times, squaring up with the net, and launches the ball in the air. it falls in the net.
“nice,” he breathes. “don’t let my coach see you. he’ll replace me.”
she turns to look at him, mirroring his smile.
“you’re laying it on a little thick, cameron,” she teases. she’s touched that he’s being so sweet just to cheer her up.
“just telling it like it is,” he says. he passes the ball to her again. “let’s see how you do with some defense.”
he steps between her and the net, a hard wall against her. his hands find her hips as she tries to line up with the net, his big frame moving with her.
“i’m pretty sure that’s a technical foul,” she says. “you can’t touch me like that.”
“nah, that’s not a rule.”
“you can’t just decide that,” she laughs.
“such a tight-ass,” he scoffs with a smirk, taking his hands off her hips and cradling her face. “how about this? this allowed?”
she giggles, holding the ball in one hand and hooking the other around his neck to pull him closer. their lips touch tenderly, both of them expelling a quiet sigh of contentment under the kiss.
she pulls back. he’s too busy staring at her in awe to block her from making another shot.
“your defense sucks,” she teases. rafe puts his hand to his chest in mock outrage.
“now you’re trash-talking?” he says. she watches him pick up the ball. he makes it look so effortless, the net swishing as the ball whizzes through it.
she’s seen him on the court so many times before, but she never tires of the sight, always so struck by how skilled he is.
they play for another twenty minutes, talking and taking turns shooting hoops, until she finally feels too tired to keep going. and she realizes she hasn’t thought about her failed midterm the entire time.
“thank you,” she says as they settle in his car. “i feel better. sweaty, but better.”
“it always works. just gotta burn your energy on something else so you can’t use it stressing out.”
“smart,” she says. “i’ll keep that in mind when i take your spot on the team.”
“i’m not so sure about that anymore,” he says. “you take fucking forever to throw. you’d run out the shot clock every time.”
she laughs, thinking about how many times in the last twenty minutes she kept the ball in her hands while she got lost in conversation with him.
she playfully shoves him, but he takes her hand and pulls her in, meeting her in a slow kiss.
“listen, i don’t want to hear the word stupid come out of your mouth again,” he mumbles. “not when you’re talking about yourself. i’m serious.”
she looks down at her lap, exhaling slowly. she knows he’s right. there’s no reason for her to bully herself so mercilessly.
“okay.”
“and please, baby,” he says solemnly, his tone deep as if he’s about to say something serious, “throw the ball faster next time.”
“i hate you,” she laughs, shoving him again. he smirks at her, putting the car in drive.
rafe has felt proud of himself a few times in his life, mostly with his athletic achievements, but he thinks that hearing her laugh, knowing he’s the one who made her feel better, is the proudest he’s ever felt.
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lonelym00n · 2 years ago
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Is it okay to run when you're feeling weak?
Part 3 of The Devil Likes the Pirate Series
Tara Carpenter x Reader
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Word Count: 4.1k
Summary: You get closer with Tara and all her friends. She opens up to you about her past.
It had been a few days since you last saw Tara, and though she did follow up on her promise to text you, it was hard not to feel a bit sad about the time spent away from her. And sure, maybe it was ridiculous to be feeling that way, but within the short span of time that you’d gotten to know her, Tara had you wrapped tightly around her pinky finger. 
You’re currently tucked into your favorite corner of Blackmore’s library, textbooks splayed haphazardly in front of you. Your backpack occupies the chair to your right and the two positioned across from you remain empty, a rare occurrence for this time of the year. You would’ve expected the library to be filled with students cramming for exams, but then again, you had to admit that midterm week wasn’t as hellish as you expected it to be. While you normally despised studying, you were honestly just more thankful for the reprieve from being buried up to your eyeballs in assignments. 
Your attention is barely on your studies, way too preoccupied with thoughts of Tara and when you’d get to see her next. The last you’d heard from her was that Sam had her locked up in their ‘dungeon of an apartment’ and that she likely wouldn’t be able to escape for a while. You felt bad for being the cause of not only a huge fight between the two sisters, but the loss of Tara’s freedom too. You’d jokingly told Tara over text that you’d shimmy up the fire escape so the two of you could hangout and she replied that Sam would probably shoot you if she caught you. Having witnessed how scary the older girl was when mad, you certainly weren’t going to find out if the threat was empty or not. 
Just as you’re about to turn back to your work, your phone buzzes with a notification. You curiously shift your eyes to it and nearly jump out of your seat in joy as Tara’s contact name is displayed on the screen.
Tara: hey stranger
Y/N: hey matey
Tara: enoughhhh pirate jokes 
Y/N: okay okay
Y/N: so what’s up?
Tara: i’m bored, pls tell me ur doing something fun so i can live vicariously through u
Y/N: sorry nothing exciting, just studying for midterms in the library
Tara: shit i almost forgot about those
Tara: i hate house arrest
Y/N: house arrest must suck
Y/N: any chance you’ll be off of it soon?
Tara: ughh hopefully sometime this week
Tara: why, do you miss me or something? ;)
Y/N: god you’re insufferable
Y/N: but… maybe i do miss u just a little bit
Tara: awww i knew it <3
Tara: i’ll talk to sam when she gets back from the store and see what i can do
You click your phone off with a sigh. Sam would probably refuse to let Tara out of the house and you’d be stuck thinking about her from a distance. Whatever reason Sam has for being so protective of Tara must be a really good one. You couldn’t even begin to guess what had happened. Tara did mention that she’d tell you eventually, and you made a mental note to be extremely patient with her in the meantime. 
Reaching into your backpack, you pull out a pair of noise canceling headphones and place them onto your head. You switch on some soft music to play in the background while studying and start reviewing the exam material.
You sit hunched over your thick textbook for what must’ve been at least an hour or two. You’re so engrossed in your reading that you don’t notice that the two chairs in front of you are being pulled out. It isn’t until you feel a tap on your shoulder that you register that there are now two people sitting in front of you. 
“Oh shit!” You jump slightly in surprise and tear the headphones off your head. “So sorry, I didn’t even see you sit down.”
You finally glance up to see who is in front of you and promptly choke on your spit.
Tara grins cheekily back at you, grin stretching further at the coughing fit you’re now caught up in. “Surprise!”
“Tara, what the hell are you doing here?!” You practically splutter out the question, cheeks tinting pink (as they so often do around Tara) in embarrassment when you realize that another person is witnessing you literally choke at the sight of Tara. 
Tara mischievously raises a single eyebrow at you and her eyes twinkle with joy, “You should know by now that giving your location to your kidnapper is a bad idea.”
You laugh gleefully at the familiar joke and a feeling of warmth blossoms throughout your chest. 
“Jokes aside, I convinced Sam to let me come here to study for midterms. She allowed it but made me bring a friend with me.” She turns to where her friend is sitting silently beside her and then looks back at you, “Do you remember Mindy?”
The girl looks sort of familiar, but you couldn’t say you remembered exactly who she was. You smile apologetically at her and exchange a quick hello before speaking, “It’s nice to officially meet you Mindy. I’m assuming you were part of the group that helped rescue me?”
Thankfully, Mindy doesn’t seem offended that you don’t remember her. She nods and slowly smirks, “Y’know I’m not surprised you don’t remember me, you were too busy making googly eyes at Tara here to notice anybody else.” 
You flush a deep red before groaning and ducking your head down to bury yourself in your abandoned textbook. 
Above you, Tara and Mindy snicker at your reaction. 
“Told you she blushes easily.” The two laugh some more at Tara's retort.
You lift your head up with a frown etched onto your face. Promptly, you flip both of them off. They each respond with a chuckle.
“Anyways, even though you so rudely insulted me,” you roll your eyes playfully at Mindy before softening your expression, “I want to say I really appreciate whatever your part in helping me that night was. I already told Tara this, but it means so much to me that you guys were looking out for me. I’m sorry for whatever drama I caused in the aftermath”
Tara eyes you softly while Mindy waves off your apology. “No need to apologize. It was the right thing to do and I’m glad we were able to help. Even if Sam did almost kill me”
Tara swats Mindy on the shoulder for her comment. Deciding to change the subject, she scans her eyes across your study space before fixing you with a scrutinizing look. “How long have you been here for?”
“Uhh,” you tap your pencil against the desk while you think, “Two, maybe three hours. Why?”
Tara gasps and tuts at you disapprovingly, “Have you taken a break from studying to eat something at least?”
You shake your head, now that she’s mentioned it, you could use a snack. 
She stands up and gently pulls you out of your seat. “C’mon,” she tugs your arm, “I’m gonna get you a snack.”
Obediently, you go to follow, but stop dead in your tracks when Mindy speaks up in alarm, “Wait, Tara?!” 
Tara sighs heavily, drops your arm, and gives you a pointed look that tells you to wait where you are while she goes to talk to Mindy,
From your spot a few feet away, you can just barely make out their hushed conversation.
“You heard Sam, she said I need to stay with you at all times! We can’t piss her off again.” 
Tara grunts in annoyance, “No, she said not to let me out of your sight. We’re just going to the coffee place right over there, you can watch us from where you are.”
“I don’t know.” Mindy sounds unsure.
“Mindy please? I’ll buy you a brownie and a latte.” You can tell by her adorable tone that she’s pouting and it takes a lot of self-discipline not to turn around to see it.
Mindy draws out a long groan, “Fine! But I’m gonna be watching so don’t do anything I wouldn’t want to see.”
Tara’s smile is triumphant as she skips over to you and threads her fingers through yours. You give her hand a small squeeze. 
As the two of you wait in line, she looks up at you sweetly, “So did you really miss me or were you just joking earlier?”
You bite your lip, hoping to god she won’t tease you if you tell the truth. “I did miss you. You grew on me really quickly Tara.”
She sighs happily, “Good, because I was thinking the same thing. I really missed you too.”
You grin like an idiot, so glad that you weren’t alone in your sentiment. 
The line shifts up slightly and it is swiftly your turn to order. You give the barista your order and motion for Tara to do the same. When she relays her coffee order, you do your best to commit it to memory. She adds Mindy’s items and before she can retrieve her wallet, you whip out your card and tap it against the screen. Tara glares at you but you only smile back innocently.
The two of you slide down to wait for your food and drinks to be ready. 
“Well,” Tara drags out the word and releases a breath, “I know you’re probably wondering why Sam locked me in the apartment or why I couldn’t come here without Mindy. And I do owe you an explanation but-”
You hastily cut her off, “You don’t owe me an explanation for anything Tara. It’s all up to whether you want to tell me or not. Whatever it is you went through, it’s obviously a very big deal. I’d understand if it’s not something you want to ever share with me.”
She pulls you into a quick hug, “I do want to tell you, but I think I need more time. Just so you know though, it’s something that me, Mindy, Chad, and Sam all went through. That’s why we’re all so protective of each other.”
You give her an understanding look, “Thank you for trusting me with that.”
She nods, “Sam’s still really mad at me and she probably won’t let me go alone anywhere for a while. I do want to keep hanging out with you though. Do you mind that it has to be with one of my friends?”
Your brow furrows slightly and you’re fast to shake your head, “No I don’t mind at all. I totally get it and I’m honestly just happy that I get to see you at all. Plus, your friends seem really nice, it’d be nice to get to know them.”
Tara sighs in relief before wrapping her arms around your neck and leaning up to kiss you on the cheek. 
You smile brightly at the gesture. 
A few seconds later your name is called and you step forward to collect the order. Tara grabs the items you’re unable to scoop up. The two of you return back to where Mindy is sitting.
She chirps out a thanks and the three of you enjoy your food silently. The rest of the afternoon is spent with you continuing to study, with Tara and Mindy begrudgingly joining you. You take frequent breaks to poke fun at each other and your heart flutters happily in your chest. If this is what it felt like to have friends, you never wanted to let them go.
From that day forward, you began to spend a lot of time with Tara and her ragtag group of friends. You loved hanging out with them, they were everything you felt you’d been missing in college. Mindy was sarcastic and hilarious and Anika was kind and bubbly. You liked her especially because she would always put a stop to Mindy’s teasing. Chad was cool, but you found him to be a bit more intimidating than everyone else. You didn’t mind Ethan, he was just a bit too shy and dorky for your liking. 
Overall, you found a sense of home in the group. You were so grateful that they accepted you into their circle with open arms. 
Your feelings for Tara were stronger than you’d ever felt for anyone thus far in your life. Her personality shone so brightly, it was no wonder why all her friends gravitated towards her so strongly. She was so sweet, yet so witty, brave, and strong. You are beyond thankful that you were lucky enough to stumble into her life, and you tell her so all the time.
The weeks fly by as you become even further integrated into the group of friends. You’re no longer on the outside, you’re one of them. Not a day goes by where you don’t feel so fortunate to have met them.
It’s after one of your many hangouts with Tara, Mindy, and Anika (you refer to them as double dates in your head) that Tara tells you she has a surprise for you. She takes you to a beautiful park and leads you to a more secluded spot, where a picnic is neatly laid out. You squeal like a child and excitedly run over to take a seat on the blanket. A conversation you can’t make out plays behind you.
“Anika and I are going to be just over there. We’ll be able to see you the whole time. Are you sure you want to tell her?”
Though Tara feels nervous, she nods her head nonetheless, “I trust her Mindy. It’s going to hurt like hell to talk about it again, but I want her to know. Besides, she’s in danger even being around us, so I feel like I owe it to her to tell her.”
Mindy agrees, she’d done the same thing with Anika when things got serious between them. She understands the position that Tara is in. “Okay. Call out if you need us.”
The three girls split off, heading their separate ways. 
Tara plops down next to where you’re splayed out on the blanket, her thigh bumping against your own. You grin lazily at her.
She takes a moment to herself to admire you. Her fingers card through your hair before shifting to smooth the pads of her thumbs across your cheeks. You relax into the touch, sighing softly.
Tara’s lips press to your forehead and you close your eyes at the gentle contact.
She murmurs out your name and you leisurely open your eyes. “I’m ready to tell you about what happened.”
You open your mouth to protest but she shuts down your attempt, “No it’s okay, I want to tell you. Everyone else is okay with you knowing. Even Sam.”
You sit up straight, “Even Sam? She knows about me?”
Tara eyes you a little guiltily, “ I told her a while ago that we’ve been hanging out. She isn’t thrilled about it, but she was glad to at least know. She’s been trying to meet you, but I keep turning her down. I didn’t want her to scare you away before I could give you the full story.”
It’s a little scary that Tara’s overprotective sister knows about you, but you reassure Tara that it’s fine. “Well at least we haven’t been sneaking around her back, she’d probably be more upset if that were the case. I’d love to meet her someday.”
Tara seems thankful that you don’t freak out about it. The two of you sit in silence for a moment. Tara turns to face you, a faraway look in her eyes. Sensing that things are about to get heavy, you give Tara your full attention. 
“Have you ever heard of the Stab movies?”
You scratch your chin in thought. “Maybe? I think I’ve heard of them but I’ve never seen one.”
“Well,” she explains, “The original movie is based upon a series of killings that took place in Woodsboro, California. The two killers, Billy Loomis and Stu Macher, went crazy and killed a bunch of their friends. After the first Stab movie came out, the events of the killings became well-known by everyone.”
You’re completely unsure why you’re hearing facts about this movie, but Tara must have a reason, so you remain silent.
“Ever since the original killings and the first Stab movie, different people have taken up the killer’s mantle. These series of killings have been repeated five different times and three of them have taken place in Woodsboro.”
You feel dumb, how hadn’t you heard about a literal horror movie being remade five different times? “Oh my gosh, I had no idea.”
Tara’s eyes brim with tears and she looks smaller than ever at this moment. “Y/N, I moved here from Woodsboro a few months ago.” 
You gasp and tears jump into your own eyes. You gently pull Tara into your lap to comfort her. “Oh Tara, I’m so sorry. It must’ve been so scary to live there.” 
You press a few soft kisses into her hairline as her tears begin to silently drip down her face. 
“I didn’t just live there." She pauses for a long moment. "I lived through one of the killings.”
Oh my god. Your body shakes as your own tears spill out. You hug her closer to you and she wraps her arms around your neck.
After a minute of quietly sobbing, she continues with what you are sure must’ve been a real-life nightmare, “It’s a tradition for the killer to wear a black cloak and a white mask with a screaming ghost face. I was home alone the first time I got attacked. I got stabbed seven different times and the killer broke my leg.”
She cries into your shirt and you clutch her so tightly in your arms. It’s unbelievable to hear that the girl who seems so put together at all times almost died a few months ago. 
“I was so scared when I woke up in the hospital. It was almost impossible to believe that I had survived. And then about a day later, I was attacked again at the hospital.”
You reach aimlessly into the picnic basket and fish out a bottle of water, which you then offer to Tara. She takes a meek sip, but gives you a grateful look.
“After that, Sam decided we needed to leave town. It wasn’t safe anywhere. But, I didn’t have an inhaler with me, so we had to stop at my girlfriend’s house, where I kept a spare. It was a trap, and my sister’s boyfriend Richie and my girlfriend, Amber, revealed themselves to be the killers.”
She sobs brokenly at the mention of her girlfriend. You do everything you can think of to comfort her, even while knowing that it would never be enough to make her feel better. The betrayal of her own girlfriend almost killing her would likely stay in her mind forever.
“Fighting spread all throughout the house. Eventually, Amber and Richie were overpowered. Sam killed Richie but I- I-” 
You coo at her and rub your hands soothingly around her whole body. She’s crying so hard she can barely breathe and you fish out the inhaler you’ve seen her take out of the front pocket of her pants many different times. You spew words of praise and encouragement at her as her shaky hand wraps around it and she takes a puff of much needed air.
Once her breathing has calmed, she continues her sentence from earlier, “I killed Amber. I shot my own girlfriend right in the forehead. I’ll never forget seeing her body crash into the ground. Some days I can’t live with the thought of what I did to her.”
“I’m so so sorry Tara. She never should’ve put you through that.”
Tara sniffles. “I lost so much over the course of three days. We all did. Our best friend Wes and his mother were killed. Chad was attacked and he lost his girlfriend, Liv. Mindy got stabbed in the shoulder. We didn’t deserve to go through all that pain.”
You hum in agreement. The three people you proudly called your friends certainly didn’t deserve that. You had so much more love and appreciation for them now knowing what they’d fought through. 
Tara has calmed down a bit and just as you think the worst of it is over, she speaks up again, “A few more things. Sam is the daughter of Billy Loomis, the original ghostface killer. I learned during Woodsboro that she and I have different dads. Mindy and Chad’s uncle, Randy, was a part of the original killings and didn’t make it through the second. Basically, all of this means that you’re in a ton of danger just from hanging around with us. Ghostface always comes back to haunt the survivors.”
While you should, you don’t care that your life is in danger. You’re more worried about someone coming back to attack your friends. You would never be the same if you lost one of them so cruelly.
Tara has stopped crying, but she still looks so sad. “I understand if you don’t want to hang around us, you know?”
You huff out a breath you didn’t even know you’d been holding. Tenderly, you tilt Tara’s chin up until her eyes meet yours. “Tara, I could never leave you or our friends. In fact, you’re going to have to try harder than ever to get rid of me. Now I’m the one who’s not going to let you out of their sight.”
Her brown eyes swirl with so many different emotions as she looks up at you. You’d pay a million dollars for the chance to take a peek inside her head right now. 
You’re suddenly met with the familiar warmth of her lips pressing gently into yours. You melt into the sweet kiss.
Tara pulls back reluctantly and bops you on the nose while she slowly climbs off of your lap. You miss her warmth immediately, but don’t protest.
“Look, Y/N, I really really like you. But as much as I want to be, I’m not ready for a relationship right now. I’m sorry, I never meant to lead you on.”
Tears spring out of your eyes despite your desperate attempts to keep them in. Though you are completely understanding, your heart still breaks at the news. “It’s okay Tara, I get it.”
She wants so badly to reach out and comfort you, but she feels she’s done enough damage for one night. 
You pull your knees up to your chest and cry softly. Tara, who you had flirted with and even kissed several different times, was now telling you she didn't want a relationship. Your hopes had been so high that things were going to work out romantically between the two of you that you hadn't prepared yourself for the possibility of being turned away. Regardless of the way your chest aches with sorrow, you feel stupid for crying in front of Tara, who has gone through so much. 
You swipe your tears away aggressively, berating yourself for your moment of weakness. “Can we still be friends?”
You don’t even really know why you’d asked the question. Being just friends with Tara, the girl you feel so strongly for, is going to tear you apart from the inside out. A whole new set of tears trickles uselessly down your face, clouding your vision completely. 
Tara’s heart clenches at the sadness that oozes out of you, “Of course.”
You can’t stay here anymore and let Tara witness you being a worthless mess. You call out to Anika and Mindy, who come rushing over. 
Before they make it into earshot, you whisper to Tara, “I’m sorry. I know it’s the asshole move, but I just need some time to get a handle on my feelings for you. I still really want to be your friend, but I can’t do it right away. I care about you so much, so please keep yourself safe.”
A protest flies out of her mouth as you stand up and dust yourself off. “I’m so sorry Tara, thank you for trusting me with everything, I’ll never tell another soul. See you in a bit.”
Anika and Mindy arrive shortly after you tell Tara goodbye. They try to call out to your retreating form, but you’re too wrapped up in your deprecating thoughts to listen. The three girls can only watch helplessly as you trudge further and further away.
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mimiii-3 · 2 years ago
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hello! I have read your "Twst boys reactions to your nervous habits" post multiple times now (it's so good!), and, seeing as you also take requests, I'd like to request a second part with Azul, Jamil, and Jade reacting to other nervous habits of a gn reader, with perhaps hair pulling, nail biting, and leg bouncing as the habits (in any combination)?
wonderful writing, by the way!
Hi Anon! Thank so much for the kind words! Here’s part two :D (also you’re my first ask so yayyyy)
Twst boys reactions to your nervous habits Pt. 2
Note/warning: gn reader, nail biting, leg bouncing, hair pulling, hair (no specified length or type), a little crying, angst, comfort
Azul
Your boyfriend, Azul, was busy with some contract business in the VIP section. You waited patiently for him to get done so the two of you could go on a long awaited date. Everything was fine until the lounge started to become increasingly busy. Crowded, noisy place always made you nervous. You started to bite your nails. It was a habit that you’ve dealt with for quite some time.
You weren’t too concerned about your habit but the way students would stare at your nails made you uncomfortable. You sunk lower into the booth and gnawed at your already stubby nails. They were so short you could barely bite them.
Azul made his way out of the VIP section and went to look for you. He found you hunkered down in a booth. One hand holding your phone and the other being chewed on. He sighed and sat down next to you. You perked up at your boyfriend’s sudden appearance but before you could greet him, he gently took your hand in his.
First, he kissed the back of your hand. Then, he kissed every line on your palm. He kissed your knuckles and tips of your fingers. He pressed fleeting kisses to your short nails. He repeated his ministrations over and over again. The loving gesture made your head spin. He finally lifted his head to get a good look at you.
“Hello, my love. Thank you for waiting so patiently. I have an idea for our date. How about a manicure instead?”
Jamil
You tried so hard not to pull your hair. Often times you would cry after seeing how many strands you pulled out in just a matter of minutes. You tried to hide this side of you from Jamil but his observation skills were unmatched.
Jamil was busy packing Kalim’s bag while you read through your notes. You sat criss-cross applesauce with your back facing Jamil. You were studying for the upcoming history exam that you had the feeling would be unbearably hard. You unconsciously started to pull at your hair.
Jamil watched you out of the corner of his eye. The way you picked and pulled at your hair follicles made him hold his breath. He hated seeing you so anxious. He put down Kalim’s bag and made his way over to you.
Jamil lowered himself down behind you and sat with his chest pressed against your back. He extended his legs out on either side of yours. Before you could ask what he was doing, he began to part your hair into separate pieces. Jamil took one of the pieces and began to braid it. He handled your hair so delicately. Gingerly moving your hair left and right. After finishing the braid, he kissed it.
“Such beautiful hair shouldn’t be pulled so carelessly. After I finish braiding it, I’ll help you study for the exam. For now, relax and let me take care of you.”
Jade
Bouncing your leg was a normal occurrence for you. Bouncing your leg never felt bad. It actually helped you ease the mid-lecture jitters. When one leg got tired, you would switch to the other. Dare you say, you liked bouncing your leg.
Jade, on the other hand, could not share the sentiment. He sat right next to you in Professor Trein’s lecture. He was forced to watch your leg bounce for what felt like hours. It didn’t help that you had the goofiest smile on your face while absentmindedly bouncing your leg.
One particular lecture, Professor Trein was going over the content that would be on the midterm. Jade knew he had to pay close attention but couldn’t because of your incessant leg bouncing. Fed up, Jade decided to do something about your lecture habit.
Wordlessly, Jade slid his hand onto your thigh and held your leg in place. You froze. You turned to look at the perpetrator and made eye contact with Jade. It was like he was staring into your soul. There was something else lurking behind his stare. The butterflies in your stomach must be on fire with the way you’re burning all over. The way you very audibly gulped was not lost on Jade. A toothy grin slowly made its way on his face.
“Come by the lounge after class.”
. . .
Note: Jade’s part got me feelin some type of way🫣
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ryjmhcore · 2 years ago
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girls like you
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college student au
fem!reader x ryujin
synopsis: you’ve been dragged to a party, the opposite of how you’d like to be spending your friday night but you owed your best friend a night out and so here you are. but a certain someone catches your eye, and maybe the party won’t be as bad as you thought.
warnings: people drinking, general party stuff (it’s a warning for me bc i hate parties <3), this is going to be pretty tame so idk what else to put LOL, suggestive, a bit of dirty talk
word count: 1.8k
a/n: OKAY I GOT CARRIED AWAY TOWARDS THE END AND IT GOT MORE SUGGESTIVE THAN I INTENDED, I may write a second part as smut but we’ll see if I get the energy. either way this isn’t my first ever ryujin fic but it is my first posted one so <3 thank you for reading. There is a severe lack of ryujin fics and I need to fix that. Anyway, I hope you enjoy.
masterlist
As soon as you’re dragged past the door, the bass fills your body and a certain organic smell wafts through your nose. You can barely move without bumping into someone, everyone holding red cups of whatever concoction they’ve decided to poison themselves with for the night, and random cheering sounding throughout the house. The regret already sets in as you continue to be dragged along by your classmate turned good friend, Lia, who wants to find her other friends she’d wanted to introduce you to.
How she managed to drag you out of your comfy apartment was an impressive feat in and of itself since you owed her a night out after midterms. Can’t say no to the birthday girl who wanted a late celebration.
After what felt like eons of her hand on your wrist dragging you through the crowd of people bumping and drinking to the music that is more bass than anything, you finally come to a slightly quieter spot where you see four other girls standing around the bottom of a staircase. Lia lets go of your wrist and runs up to them, waving at them with a huge smile on her face. You follow along slowly, letting her greet all of them.
“Girls! This is Y/N, she’s been my project partner that I’ve been telling you about!!!” At this, all of the girls look at you and you return a small smile, sending them a short salute.
“All good things I’m hoping.” You chuckle, and they all greet you and introduce themselves. Yeji, Chaeryeong, Yuna and Ryujin. Ryujin… she seems familiar, though you can’t seem to put your finger on it. Regardless, you all engage in some small talk and your eyes tend to linger on Ryujin a little more than the others.
Her black hair tied up in a slick ponytail, little white ensemble decorated with feathered wings on her back matching the girls’ theme of angels and you, dressed up in a devil’s costume with the expected horns atop your head, and a tight black dress with a slit adorned by fishnet stockings.
You chalk your staring up to trying to figure out how you know her, and definitely not your eyes lingering on glittery expanses of her skin. Lia runs off to grab you a drink, and the other girls take this time to ask you questions, all quite general and mainly wondering what Lia’s like in her classes where you joke about her sleeping majority of the time. Once Lia comes back, and the alcohol joins your veins, the group of you go find a comfier area to hang out and luckily the couches are free due to a game of beer pong happening outside.
You sit in the middle as Lia pulls you down to her right, and Ryujin settles on your right as the other girls settle on the other couch. Conversations continue, before Lia groans and tries to hide her face as she spots her ex. “Girl, help, he’s here.”
Looking up, you spot her ex and groan alongside her as it looks like he has a new girl on his arm dressed in the same themed angel costume. “Fuck, look at this motherfucker flexing his new girlfriend. Want me to fight him?” You offer and she laughs, but shakes her head and decides to chug the rest of her drink.
“What I need is another drink, you want a refill?”
“Nah, I’m good. You need me to come with?” You offer and she lets you know she’ll be fine, just a quick refill to grab. Yuna decides to go with her, needing a refill herself and you lean back in the chair, remembering Ryujin next to you. With your neck bent to rest your head on the back of the couch with both eyes closed, you crack open one eye to look over at Ryujin and catch her gaze. She quickly looks away and fidgets a bit, a soft blush covering her cheeks as she quickly sips on her drink.
Interesting.
When you give a small smirk at her cute reaction, she crosses her legs and your eyebrows raise ever so slightly.
Very interesting.
Her perfume softly wafts through your senses, and you have to fight the urge to smell the scent from her neck directly, something is so alluring but familiar about it. Thoughts of your hands on her thighs fill your head and you quickly shake the thoughts out of your head as Lia sits back down on your other side, and you nod your head at her as a gesture asking if she’s okay. She nods and goes back to continuing her discussion with Yuna.
Ryujin fiddles in spot, reaching at her back and regularly adjusting her wings and you can feel her frustration getting to her so you sit up and turn to her.
“Did you want some help?” You offer, and she looks at you like a deer in headlights, meekly apologising for bothering you but you assure her she wasn’t, reiterating your offer and holding your hand out and nodding towards the bathroom. “It’s no problem, I’m sure they’re a pain to wear. You’ll still look like an angel without them, just say you’re a ‘fallen angel’ if anyone asks.” You smile and she giggles a little, shrugging her shoulders in a ‘why not’ gesture and takes your hand and you help her stand while making sure the wings don’t knock into anyone or anything.
She’s still holding your hand as you head to the bathroom, trying to safely weave through people and you notice each time you look back to check on her that she’s trying to pull down the hem of her dress each time as it keeps riding up her thighs slightly. Your eyes linger before you accidentally bump into someone which causes you to tumble slightly and she ends up pressed against you as a result.
Fuck. There was that scent of hers.
Ryujin stutters out as she asks if you’re okay, and you abashedly rub at the back of your head as you let her know you got a little distracted and bumped into someone. Luckily, the bathroom is vacant and a few steps away so you quickly pull her into it and shut the door behind the both of you, trying to manoeuvre around her wings.
“Okay, are they just like, placed on like a little backpack?” You ask her, and she blushes slightly as she shakes her head.
“I mean, sort of but they’re, uh, like an attachment to underneath my dress. There’s holes for them to fit and they’re attached to my bra…” She explains and your eyes widen slightly, but you offer her a comforting smile regardless.
“I can turn around if you feel uncomfortable, I just figured they were kind of hard to take off yourself but I didn’t really think about it deeply.” You rub your neck again as a nervous habit of yours but she assures you it’s okay.
“Well, I, um-“ She tries to get out as it looks like she has something she really wants to say and you tilt your head as you look at her, waiting for her to continue but she isn’t able to.
“Here, how about you turn around and I can help unzip the dress so we can get to the bra and try to detach the wings okay?” Ryujin nods, so you put your hands on her shoulders and turn her around, and your hands slowly find the zipper on the back of her dress. Ever so gently, you begin to unzip it and it reveals a bit more of the expanse of her back. All you want to do is place your face in her neck and taste her, but you keep those thoughts to yourself and get back to the task at hand.
Shit. That’s right.
The back of her bra is exposed to you, and you have to touch her back a little as you try to find where the wings are attached. “Are you okay? My touch isn’t making you uncomfortable right?” You ask, and she weakly tells you it’s okay, somehow seeming as if she’s finding it hard to speak.
As you feel the urge to ask again if she’s sure, you spot a small tattoo just above the line of her bra, placed right in the middle of her back and it hits you. Another halloween night in your second year of college, the first party you had ended up attending, you met a girl in her first year who wore a mask covering the top half of her face who ended up underneath you. She wore a ninja costume, claiming she didn’t want to stand out but she certainly did to you when you thought of those lips who moaned out the sweetest things for you that night. And that tattoo, the times you kissed and bit it as you had your way with her that night bent over someone’s bed. You never did get her name, and now you regret not having gotten it last time.
“So THAT’S why you’ve been all shy with me huh angel?” You purr out to her, and her head turns around so fast she almost injures herself but she steadies herself with her hand on the sink, and you catch her with a hand on her waist. Her thighs are now on either side of your body, and as you hand on her waist twitches, you can feel her thighs tense.
You give a sultry smile, and trace the tattoo on her back. “You know, all night I was wondering why you seemed so familiar. First, it was how you smelt.”
You lean down, placing your nose in the junction right where her neck and shoulder meet, giving a soft kiss as you breathe her scent in and she gasps, her body getting covered in goosebumps as she grips onto your arms. “I- I didn’t-“
“Second, it was that little tattoo on your back I never did manage to get out of my mind. All the times I kissed it as you fell apart on my fingers that night, hm?” Your lips trail up her neck and your hand tightens on her waist as your other hand grips the sink, her head slowly falls back and an almost inaudible whimper reaches your ears.
“And now that I think about it, your pretty little whimpers and the grip on my arm is feeling all so familiar to me now. I’m sorry I didn’t remember you straight away baby, I’ll make it up to you, would you like that?” She looks up at you with teary eyes, and nods as she whimpers out a soft please.
Oh, you’re about to have a lot of fun.
You smile, slowly leaning your head so that your lips are only a breath away from hers, and just before closing the gap you stand up.
“Well angel, we’ve gotta take those wings off you first now don’t we? It’s what we came in here for after all.” You smirk, arms crossed in front of your chest and she glares at you with her lips in a pout as she rests against the sink. “Aw, angel, did you really want me to ruin you with your wings on after all? Want to look at those wings in the mirror as I show you how dirty I can really make you feel? How a devil corrupts their precious angel?”
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enm-enthusiast · 1 year ago
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The Exhibitionists Club Ch. 5 Part 1 - Thomas
Author’s Note: Time for a little doctor-themed story! Also, watch out for George, he’s bad news for Thomas… 
Thomas
It was another lecture with my new Anatomy Professor, Ethan Rivers, and unfortunately for me I was doing poorly in his class ever since I failed to study hard enough for the first exam of the semester. It was my own fault, really, I had been out late the night before trying to find my clothes when Seb had them all scattered across my dorm building as his way of welcoming me on campus. Since then I’ve toned down my adventures and I threw myself into my studies to make up for it, and I’d made good progress so far but I’d be lucky to earn a B+ because the exams in this class counted for much of our grade. I was sitting there anxiously thinking of how I could possibly earn some sort of extra credit perhaps? I didn’t want to pass with a bad grade or worse fail one of my earliest college courses.
I turned my attention back to Professor Ethan, who by all accounts was regarded as one of the hottest on campus and…I agreed, he was still in his late 20’s and dressed very professionally in tight-fitting clothing that accentuated his well-endowed backside and displayed a prominent bulge as well, some of my classmates had a hard time concentrating because of that. Sometimes I did, too, especially because of the rumors…
I hated listening to gossip but a few rumors had spread around before they were silenced by the University administration that Professor Ethan was spotted one evening on campus, he had been fully naked and was being dragged along at night by two others. No one could prove any of it, yet nearly everyone had heard by this point but they kept quiet around the good professor since he was genuinely well-liked and was a fair teacher. Just then, as I brought myself out of my daydreaming I heard the professor say “and by the way, those of you interested in earning some extra credit, please stop by my office after class, but be warned it is an intensive study on human anatomy so don’t take it lightly” he said. I could hardly believe my luck! Of course, I had no idea what this ‘study’ was about and could be anything from exercise, muscle mass, or even…no, I’m sure they wouldn’t want to study that. Still didn’t stop a slight flush of my cheeks at the thought, but regardless I had to see if this was for real and if it could help raise my grade.
After that, the professor wrapped up his lecture with reminders of assigned reading and warnings about the upcoming midterm, which sent a shiver up my spine at the thought. I gathered up my notebooks and textbooks and packed them into my bag as the other students began to do the same and filed out of the classroom, one by one until only me and one other student remained, a rather short red-haired fellow named George, who seemed to eye the professor a lot but the professor barely paid any heed, at least on the surface. As soon as I began my approach towards Professor Ethan’s office George turned his gaze at me and I could feel his cold piercing eyes boring holes through my clothes, skin, my very being, it was really unsettling. Thankfully, his gaze didn’t last long and he quickly gathered his things up and got up to leave, but not before sparing one last glance at the professor. That guy’s a creep, something feels wrong about him I thought to myself.
I nearly lost my train of thought as Professor Ethan noticed my approach, and he eyed me up and down. For a split second I could have sworn I saw a glint in his eye, one that seemed…familiar somehow but he greeted me with a warm, professional smile. “Ah, Thomas. I thought you might stop by after class, I know you’ve been struggling ever since the first exam, don’t worry you weren’t the only one. In fact, you weren’t the worst either, it didn’t take much convincing to let the dean give me some extra credit otherwise half the class might fail” he said.
It made perfect sense, it did seem too good to be true in my case alone but if other students were struggling as well, all the better to take the opportunity. “Ah, yes ummm…yeah, I admit I could have done better on that test, and I’m trying my best but…this could really help sort things out” I said in response, my gaze refusing to lock onto his. I couldn’t deny that Professor Ethan was one of the hottest teachers I’d ever met, he was young enough to be a student still, and he had a medium but muscled build that made his light blue dress shirt cling to his torso, but his black dress pants did his magnificent backside justice, I admit….I got lost staring at it sometimes. Not to mention, he was standing at 6 '2 with cut short dark brown hair and green eyes, and had a square jawed face that made some of his students drool during class. It was hard to ignore my cock beginning to stir in my pants as I finished speaking.
“I thought as much, it's why I already prepared the forms with your name on them just in case, all you need to do is give it a quick read and sign it” he said, and he reached inside his black carryon bag and pulled out a short stack of papers which, lo and behold, had my name stamped right on the front. I eagerly took them from his hand and started to read through it but what I was reading made both my jaw drop and my face turn red a little.
“Ah yes, that, you see the study we are conducting is on the sexual drives of young adult males and females from on campus, wherein a number of volunteers will be monitored for the duration of the study, testing various stimuli to gather data on what constitutes as ‘turn-ons’ among the...subjects” he trailed off at the end and coughed a little. I blinked in surprise as I noticed a slight blush on his own face which made him seem absolutely adorable. 
Sure enough, the forms said as much, and referred to instances like "studying the subject's full anatomy" and "subjecting the subject to invasive procedures to gauge sexual arousal response" among other things that turned my face completely red.
“Well…um, who is in charge of...studying us?” I asked, nervously.
“That would be me, actually, the dean insisted I participate since I pushed for this so badly, well…only the male subjects, my colleague Professor Whittle? she will be monitoring the female volunteers” he finished.
I turned my attention back to the document Professor Ethan gave me, most of it was the atypical agreements to ensure the University didn’t get sued in case of an accident, while others dictated that there were strict rules to be followed and if they were not…no extra credit points would be rewarded, thus it was all or nothing. 
“Thomas? Are you okay?” I heard Professor Ethan say, bringing me out of my own thoughts. It was so easy for me to get distracted, Sebastian said he found it adorable when he had to pull me back to reality, that my “shocked” face made him want to kiss me more. My heart melted at the thought of Sebastian, things were going great between us since we graduated and moved on campus, though I heard Seb had had some trouble with some of his new Fraternity brothers but nothing my precious Seb said he couldn’t handle, and I trusted him. I felt more safe and loved with him than with anyone in my entire life. We haven’t said the words yet, even though we’ve been dating for almost a full year now, but each time he ravished me, made my body writhe in pleasure and screamed his name I wanted to utter those three words, but something was holding me back, and I wanted to be sure before I said them, otherwise….I didn’t want to think about that right now, so I pushed it off to the side.
“Yeah, I’m fine, just…a little shocked to be honest” I said, giving him a sheepish smile. 
“Well, good, just get those forms signed and I will see you later tonight at 7:30 pm in Building 5, Room 1-C, alright?” he said, flashing me a full smile which sent shivers up my spine because of how much more hot it made him look. My dick twitched in agreement.
“Y-yeah, I’ll umm…see you then” I replied.
Professor Ethan turned to walk away and I took one last glance at his magnificent bubble butt before walking away myself. As soon as I had opened the door to the lecture room I felt a hand roughly grab my shoulder and another held a hand over my mouth and dragged me over to a darkened hallway nearby where the janitors kept their closets of cleaning supplies. 
“Mmph!” came out when  I tried to say ‘let me go’, and my heart pounded in my chest as I felt myself hauled against the wall and I stood face to face with those same cold, brown eyes of George from Professor Ethan’s class.
“Saw you getting cozy with hot teach Ethan, huh? What’s that he gave you?” he said and pointed to the short stack of papers still in my hand. 
“Look, i-it’s nothing, alright it's just for the extra credit he talked about in class, now come on just let me down” I said.
George only held me tighter and pressed our bodies closer to one another, and the cold fury that edged the lines of his face genuinely scared me. I felt I was about to be beaten up for even looking in Professor Ethan’s direction. 
“Extra credit, huh? You better not be lying, and you better stay as far away from teach as possible, but if I find out otherwise…”
He leaned his head towards my ear and whispered “I’ll make you my little bitch, too” he said and with that he let go of me and roughly caressed my face before walking off with a smile that chilled me to my bones. I checked to make sure I was alright and tried to calm myself down from the massive panic attack I almost had.
I managed to get my breathing under control when I felt my phone vibrating in my pants pocket, and I pulled it out to see it was Seb, and with shaking fingers I pressed the button for talk and hearing his voice sent waves of anxiety fading away in the background of my mind.
*Hey babe! You should be out of ol Ethan’s class by now, right?* he said.
“Uhm, yeah I uhm…I just left” I said in response, my hand rustling my tousled black hair which I had let grow out slightly so it dangled just above my eyebrows now. 
*Hey, what’s wrong? You sound upset? Did someone do something???? Give me names, I’ll ship their heads in boxes back to their mothers!* he said in a tone that meant he was half-serious and half-joking.
The effort of it made me smile, and as much as I wanted to talk about what happened, I didn’t want to burden him with my own problems, as long as I stayed out of George’s way…I should be fine, right? I thought to myself.
“Don’t worry babe, everything’s fine just…stressed about this extra credit that Professor Ethan talked about…” I trailed off on explaining the study and that once I met up with him at my dorm room later tonight I’d explain it more. After we got off the phone, I decided to kill time by studying until around 7, and then…then it was time to sell my soul…or my body, I suppose? I only hoped George would see I wasn’t in his way.
I wish I knew then, just how horribly wrong I was.
End of Part 1.
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gatoru · 2 years ago
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with love, armin || armin arlert x reader
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cw: reader is overwhelmed with school and work, bad feeling and bad talk about themself, talks of studying and pressure in general, crying, hurt/comfort, soft armin, gender neutral! reader.
author's note: this was a request! i hope you like it, friend. first time writing for armin, so i'd appreciate any feedback. reblogs are highly welcome.
wc: 1k
Armin gives you a sympathetic look, and you can’t bring yourself to hate it. 
You’re tired – you can’t quite remember when it started, perhaps along with your classes, but it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t change how you feel overwhelmed towards any of this. 
A sigh escapes from your lips, one you’ve been holding in for quite some time now. Your brain feels fuzzy with the information before you, the subject you were studying for starting to lose sense. The blond places his pale hand on top of your textbook, and your eyes finally leave the page – finally. 
“Are you alright?” He asks, voice barely above a whisper and as polite as ever. There’s something in his tone that says I’m here, but I don’t want to overstep. 
You and Armin are high school sweethearts. He first caught your eye during History class – he always seemed to be a natural when it came to such topic. You fell for how his eyes shined whenever he spoke about the subject, or how talkative he seemed during presentations. After getting partnered up for a final project together, you only grew closer. And the rest, well, it’s history – quite literally.
It all seems like a lifetime ago, however. College feels like a whole different world, one you feel alien in. With work on top of classes, shifts upon assignments, you barely had time to do anything: midterms were rapidly approaching, you had to make time for a dentist’s appointment, and cover a shift for one of your coworker’s. 
Armin noticed it too: how you seemed tired, with a coffee in hand constantly. 
“Yeah.” You reply, sulkily. The back of your eyes were burning, your stomach was growling from hunger, and you had so much to do. “No. Uh, I don’t know.”
Armin simply nods, seeming to know exactly what you mean. His blue eyes are soft, kind, exactly like the rest of him. This is the reason you’ve always loved study sessions with him – he’s understanding. Your boyfriend puts the book away – despite your weak protests.
“Sweetheart, I think it’s enough for today.”
He puts his stuff away – pens, a large notebook and a laptop – as you mirror him, and Armin seems to notice how your body language looks different. Defeated, almost. You’re not facing him, but he’s absolutely sure you’re on the verge of crying. 
“Hey…” He calls for you, gently. Armin gets up from his seat, now facing you. There are dark circles around your eyes, ones that didn’t seem as dark the last time you saw each other – a few days ago. “Sweetheart?”
The floodgates opened before you acknowledged his plea. Tears stream down your face, fat and warm. The small bit of mascara you had on creates a dark mess underneath your eyes. You cry – no, sob – as Armin places his large hands on your shaky shoulders.
“I don’t get it. I didn’t think it’d be this hard.” Your confession breaks his heart: your voice is small, broken – and you seem to remember you’re in an (almost empty) library. “I.. I don’t think I can do this. I don’t think college is for me. Maybe I should quit.”
“You’re not doing that.” He says, not in an authoritarian way, but in a helpful one. “You’re not doing that.”
He repeats the words, a bit closer to you now – his lips touch your hairline, soft and sweet. Armin places small kisses on your hair, arms wrapping around you and bringing you closer to his chest. His embrace is inviting, comforting. After all, Armin is your only piece of home at this place. Well, Eren too – but it doesn’t count. 
“I know it’s hard-”
“No, you don’t.”
He ignores your rebellious act towards him – the stab doesn’t reach his heart. As a matter of fact, the sharp blade of your words don’t affect him at all. 
“I’m not struggling the way you are, I know that. But I know you’re not gonna fail. I’ve seen you do it a thousand times before.”
You blink the tears away, but they get stuck on your lower lash line. 
“Do what?”
“You always bounce back, you always find a way to do it. You can handle things life throws at you.”
The smile on your lips don’t seem to reach your eyes. 
“Even then… if you can’t handle things, I’m always here to do it for you.”
Armin’s angelic face is soft and inviting, bringing you comfort by the sheer look on his eyes. 
“Armin…” You mumble his name, softly. 
His thumbs gently brush your neck. Your lover’s voice is calm, slowly but surely bringing you back from your doubts. You can feel your breathing coming back to its normal pace. 
His smooth palms find yours, fingers dancing against your skin. Armin has a pianist type of hand, with elegant digits. Yours are a little clammy from being so nervous, a bit rough from all the working. Still, his touch can only mean one thing. 
I love you. 
“Tell you what. Let’s grab something to eat on the way to your dorm. My treat, you can get whatever you like” He suggests. “We can try studying again later, maybe tomorrow."
Smiling, you nod – too tired to think, but trusting his decision. 
-
When you open your notebook the following day, looking for your notes, you find something you weren’t expecting. 
There’s a pastel blue post it, with Armin’s smooth handwriting in it and a golden star sticker glued on the corner. 
You can do this. I believe in you. You’re brilliant and worth it. I have your back, for anything that you need.
With love, your Armin. 
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romanarose · 1 year ago
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Life update
Idk if anyone is invested in my bullshit but considering for a good month i was threatening to kill myself i figure i better update y'all
Way better, holy shit. Fuck.
I was REALLY worried about being alone over thanksgiving break bc my roommate and suitemates would be gone but god its what i needed. I LOVE MY ROOMMATE SO MUCH OKAY but sometimes space is nice. i hate my suitemates lol. Either way, for DAYS it was silent. I was very sick with an awful cold and i didn't have the energy to do anything that was a danger to myself for days, I was hopped up on cought syruo and actually got full nights rest!!
prior, I got my grade back for a midterm and uuuuuuuhhhhhhh I bombed it. professor reached out bc he was surprised considering he knows my ability and how ive been engaged in class. we met up on tuesday and talked about and i admitted i nearly hospitalized myself and relapsed on SH. he was very kind and encouraging and i feel better.
Unfortunetly i was so sick during break i couldnt work on my TWO research papers but i did manage to listen to an audiobook for a whole other paper. shit happens.
Luckily i finally got the one research paper on the satanic panic going
and I was SO STUCK on this paper on Aimee Semple McPherson bc im like okay shes facinating but i dont wanna just write a biography???
but today i inally had abreak through and im gonna talk about her influence on the religous right and televangelism.
Anyway
I think im looking at an A, 2 B's and 2 C's, which i dont think is too bad for barely getting by in life
things have also improved again at work, which is nice.
this winter break ill be working at the day care i worked at over the summer and living where i have lots of friends.
I think ill be okay
thank you all SO MUCH for everyone thats checked in on me, said words of encouragment, prayed for me, loved me <3
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ansbobcar · 8 months ago
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"Theoretically what if I said 'yes'?" [Darren x Wirth Headcanons]
Taking a break from my OTP (Rinka x Orter) to focus on my first mashle oc aka Darren Randel (read more info here) ended up making me think they could be a potential ship over Darren x Rayne (I haven't even written out my ideas for them properly) so uhhh yah!
This is a long ass post and devolves into general ideas towards the end.
tyyy @golden-eye-ramblings with the idea making :D
_ _ _
First impressions? They hated each other bro. Darren legit made Wirth taste worthlessness to another dimension (lost his magic completely until sundown so about 5-7 hours) for insulting the fact she didn't use a wand at all (which she gets pretty pissed about if they try to make themselves seem better than her)
He hated this moment so much he started studying/practicing to get payback towards her whenever they encountered each other again
And that happened to be during a Labyrinth/Maze exercise in order to test their knowledge from their Advanced Magic Classes which gave out silver and bronze coins (Lang and Adler houses only)
Wirth put a lot of effort to track her down since she ran after getting stranded by her only buddy (Rayne) who SURF PARTISAN-ED OUT OF THE HEDGES--and then ambushed her whilst she was fighting a golem (man-made magic training doll nicer than Deadervants)
but Darren uses and manipulates Wirth's attacks to put down the golem and 2 silver coins spawned. At this point in time she doesn't get what the coin system is so she just splits the share and Wirth is like what in the generousness is this? Does she think he's that pitiful??? And they part ways from the thing.
Midterms arrived and Darren did pretty bad on them obviously. (she's legit only great at offensive magic)
Walkis although more competitive is really lenient with their passing marks (because the school staff are so corrupt for accepting so many bribes) which she barely achieved after fighting for no instant failing grades so she underestimated the strictness of Easton's grading.
Wahlberg and the teachers agreed that if she failed the next one/finals they might consider expelling her so she literally panics and ends up asking Rayne to help tutor her but this guy is 1) a bad teacher, 2) easily distracted by the bunnies-- they both are really distracted by the bunnies so she has no progress beyond taking remedial classes which she barely understands.
She tries to figure out where she went wrong but Wirth takes the textbook she wanted to take and like are they about to break out into another duel. Darren's about to raise her voice but Wirth shuts her up with a silencing spell (library has to be quiet or not the cursed silencer appears and does the unimaginable).
Girl explains her situation and Wirth hawks in superiority: oh my gawd I'm actually better than her! But he kind of wants to duel her again so when she gets emotional about getting expelled if she does really bad the next round he is like: "Well, Darren. You've come to the right guy! I'm great at all subjects, so what do you need help with?" Darren: "Everything else that's not Magic Geography and Magic Zoology" aka a lot of subjects.
And when I say Darren is bad she is BAD. Calls beakers, conical flasks and funnels "CUPS". She cannot tell the difference. "What did you even study?" because he is genuinely shocked at her stupidity. "The textbooks take so long to decipher and barely have pictures..."
So Wirth ends up making them study into the night and for a week straight they start drilling in the basics. Which she semi understood until he pulled out models and analogies with his mud magic.
Thus begins their mentor/mentee dynamic and Darren unironically calling him "Professor"
So when she improves and gets passing grades just before the summer they're like super duper happy
They both do summer internships at the Bureau of Magic's Power Administration and Darren like knows his whole worth-power-value mindset origin.
"Why not go for something more attainable?" "Like?" "Your... brother?" "Why my brother?" "Surely, you're close to him." "Not really, we've barely talked since he went to school. He's much older than me..." "What's his job?" "He's a Divine Visionary." "What's his name?" "Orter." Darren gets struck with the biggest WTF???? since that guy tried to like kill her.
No wonder Darren was in such a sour mood when she first saw Wirth, he was related to the guy who hated her guts and nearly beat the crap out of her during the questioning she had to do at the Bureau!
"How about we get an internship over the summer and meet him?" and he's like ok.
And thus, we are exposed to Darren's self-centered/self-interested personality and lack of communication skills (since she thinks she's easily readable, SHE'S NOT)
She manages to set up a meeting between them (Rinka and Orter) and completely destroys his self-esteem and confidence by getting straight to the point. "Do you know he has sever self-esteem issues because you're not giving him any attention?"
Orter's tryna understand what's happening but Wirth is like what the hell: "I didn't ask for you to butt into my own problems!" and he fumbles his anger/embarassment towards Orter but broski is just like: "Is that true?" regarding Darren's question.
Rinka makes the situation worse by tryna deescalate the situation with a soothing/calming spell. "There's no need to use additional violence, ruins the atmosphere more than needed." Rinka comments. "I've placed a sound barrier too. It's a safe space."
Wirth at Darren - "I CARE THAT SOMEONE'S TRYING TO JUST SHOVE THEMSELVES INTO MY PRIVACY LKKE THEY KNOW ME!!" The 3 of them just watch him pop off at Darren before it devolves into his insecurities: "Are you trying to make me feel even more worthless than I already did?!"
"I only agreed to help you with your studies! Not to get help with my own life!"
"You can't just FIX me! You can't just come in like that expecting that everything gets resolved in an instant and then you take all the credit as 'mY sAvIoR', do you have any idea how INANE OF AN IDEA THAT IS?! No! Of course you don't! Because you only ever look after yourself!!"
"Wirth. Is what you're saying true?" and bro leaves with no answer (on the verge of tears)
Their whole dynamic crumbles and Darren has some REFLECTION TIME YAYYYYYY. Some slow improvement on Darren's part with Rayne's help (blud shows his point through his actions that mimic her behaviour)
Rayne points out that Darren is not as easy to read as everyone believes her to be. Specifically, regarding her hatred for Orter and that she'd never even try to think about sabotaging Wirth. "It's only been a month since you've joined, you collected 1 whole gold coin already. I doubt it."
And then she would have apologised in person but like. Wirth is studying for the hardest attainable credit ever??? so she writes an apology letter and prays it gets read because yeh.
Dw blud read it becuz the letter ended up in Shuen's fangirl mail inbox and bro got motivated a bit more and like: oh-kay...
They're friends again yayyyy and the DV Candidate Exam is happening and they bicker through the entire ordeal until they arrive at the final round. The 1v1 battles and he gets obliterated by Rayne *whomp whomp whomp*
But surprise! His bro watched him struggle and decided to give him some affirmation and suggests replacing him (Wirth) for the winter break visit because he's kinda like disappointed that he didnt get into the next round (he wanted to do a rematch against Darren) and like the dad favouritism/worth shenanigans.
Darren gets 2nd place and enters the Trimagicathlon.
When Darren heard the match ups she got mad because she wouldn't be able to fight Wirth. (In terms of raw power, Rayne is just superior that she was lucky to be blessed with her crazy cheatcode magic to make the matchup work.)
They were in different brackets too so it just added salt to the insult bro.
So they're friends again and because Wirth doesn't have to go to his parents Darren is like: Let's intern again! But before that, mid-terms/finals!!
And that's when people start to catch whiff off seeing the two together more often.
"Have you heard? The 3rd fang is seeing that crazy wandless psycho!" "What!? Aren't they rivals or something?" "Didn't you see them at the library earlier? They were smiling at each other!"
The Magia Lupus were also kinda curious about this too so they asked him and bro's reaction is priceless because he was immersed in making a model/analogies to help Darren until they arrived. Lost his composure, literally screamed in their faces for ruining the models, and like he legit says: "Even if I did like her she's only interested in Rayne Ames"
Ain't no way in hell he's gonna become a simp for her you know?
"Theoretically, what would happen if I said I had feelings for you?"
"Then theoretically, what if I said 'yes'?"
"I doubt anything would change. We'd bicker, help each other out. Bicker more. Oh and you might be able to join us for board game night."
"Sounds fun but also boring at the same time because it just sounds like what friends do."
"I've never really had feelings for anyone so it's a bit new to me."
Wirth is dejected a bit.
Conflict of interest is she brings bro over to Rayne's BIGGEST SECRET—his bunnies and gets mad mad at her. Wirth wants to get involved but the two of them tell him to stay out of it. "This happened before you got into the picture."
But yuhh if Wirth ever confessed, he'd get friendzoned in a heartbeat because 2nd male lead syndrome!
Darren probably tried to get Rayne to join the Magia Lupus board game nights but he'd rather meet his bunnies over people so Darren gets comfy with them.
Criticizes their diets so hard (seriously why is wirth's favourite food fruit punch???), she literally is starting to become overworked as a 3rd year making nearly 15 lunchboxes every single day.
The main character syndrome it girl to overworked parent pipeline is so real for her.
She literally bonks their heads in s1 when she realises they did all that weird stuff. "I thought we were besties!" she shakes her head and penalties them to without magic for atleast 4 days.
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nanso · 2 years ago
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hi i saw your post and was wondering if you could explain what is happening in the congress? I keep seeing news alerts but don't get it
Hey! Yes, I am always happy to talk about why congress is stupid AF. In this particular case, it's pretty simple to a degree - it's all personal, which is basically what all politics is.
The 20 or so most absolutely right-wing and fascist Republicans in Congress won't vote for Kevin McCarthy, who has been the leading GOP member in the House for the past few years. 
On the surface, these members are trying to make it seem noble - it's about the debt ceiling! It's about change! We need a select committee to investigate evil Dems! 
It's not actually about any of that. It's personal and it's about power. These members are all part of what's known as the Freedom Caucus. It was born out of the Tea Party (which was racist at its core, to be clear) and is also part of the wing of the GOP that led to them barely winning what should have been a landslide midterm this past Nov. They know this too and want to show that they are relevant. 
The only goal here is to force McCarthy to withdraw. That's it. By forcing him to withdraw, they show they still have a bit of power. They don't care about policy - they're primarily corrupt idiots who traffic in hate (Gaetz, Boebert, Mary Miller) and have no business being in Congress. 
The main point out of all of this though is that - it's really Kevin McCarthy's and wider GOP leadership's fault. They have let the Freedom Caucus and the most extreme parts of the party FLOURISH over the past 10+ years with racist abandon. They've had chance after chance after chance to stop this - and didn't. And this is just one of the consequences of that cowardice.  And since they have been willing to let literally ANY bad behavior fly - there's no point in even a few reps going to McCarthy to get him over the finish line. Cause they know they don't need to.
Anyways, I hope that was an helpful explanation, anon! It's a mess.
But also:
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celiastjamesoscar · 1 year ago
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You guys definitely don’t make me miss school. Though even in college I never had testing like that. My midterm was hanging and then moving a light. Or my practical was setting up the light/camera/mic for an interview or showing we knew how to run all the aspects directing/camera/etc of a multi cam setup for an interview.
7 hours isn’t that be bad of a drive (I say as if I would ever drive that) but it’s something I could convince my friend to drive. I think the furthest we’ve driven is chicago or Detroit and both those were just 5-6 hours. I have major driving anxiety so my friend (who lives in DC) has to drive to me and then we drive to the cons.
I mean there’s a reason I didn’t even blink when I hit pre-order on those TLOU statues. I barely looked at the price cause the answer was already a yes. Just impatiently wait it’s for that Joel & Ellie one to go up. Which will be pricey but it’s TLOU so it’s fine…
College is kicking my ass right now, and I hate it 😭
Chicago is also a 6 hour drive for me, and I completely understand the driving anxiety, especially when you get into big cities like Atlanta or Chicago
Any amount of money is worth the TLOU!!!! That game altered my brain chemistry
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chessentans · 14 days ago
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I like that you wrote an entire essay here and still clearly didn't read what I wrote or listen to what she said. Like for fucks sake "take the sentiment as a call to not vote" she explicitly fucking said to vote with her fucking mouth. I am going INSANE. THIS POST IS TURNING ME INTO THE JOKER DID YOU NOT READ AT ALL.
"what she said is still a mistake" so when are we allowed to criticize the fucking democrats. When are leftist concerns EVER going to be listened to. When are we ever going to be allowed to try to push them to the left without the libs pissing and shitting that we are ruining everything. Yeah sorry you're right she should have deepthroated the boot.
Also "justified in hating queer people" are you really trying to play the respectability politics game with me. Oh people are "justified" in hating queer people cause a queer woman was loud about politics? That's fucking ridiculous. People hate us anyway and we need to push for liberation loudly.
Also lmao okay. You really are just kissing Kamala's ass. She has said the bare minimum about Palestine and whenever she does covers for Israel and. YES. When our "ally" is doing a genocide we need to stop them!! A ceasefire is politically popular and even if it wasn't it would be THE CORRECT THING TO DO And you're really going at a POP STAR for "fueling transphobia" (which she isn't doing) but being like yes it's okay that the Dems aren't vocally defending trans people??? It dosent bother you that they've ceded that issue entirely on the public stage? Also trans rights IS popular. The right basically running the midterms on transphobia was disastrous. Yes, I wouldn't run an entire campaign on like I'm good on trans rights but most people believe that trans people deserve legal protections
Oh myyyy gooooddd. Yes there is a history of transphobia in drag and that is important to acknowledge but if you've ever been In a queer space you'd know full well that SO MANY DRAG QUEENS ARE TRANS ALSO WHY JUST ASSUME THAT HER OR ALL DRAG QUEENS ARE VILE HATERS .Go outsideeeeee.... GO TO A GAY BAR... and drag bans are popping up around the country with the logic being that any kind of gender nonconformity is bad. So the logical is anti-trans. I swear people saw the phrase "both sides" and passed out. She was not saying that as a centrist she was saying that both mainstream political parties have the ghoulish positions about things and the Dems need to be pushed!! Why have the Dems ceded to the right on immigration, and trans issues and why are they pro Israel! But she clearly said the right is so much worse!
Also yes. That's how democracy is supposed to work. You push people to the positions you want. Which is what she was doing. She made it clear that she wanted Kamala and was voting for Kamala but she needs to be criticized so she will push. The uncommitted movement had the same logic
Also nice reading idiot. I didn't accuse you of queer phobia I said that she is facing homophobia generally for being a loud outspoken queer woman and literally gave you an example of that happening LMAO. Also sexism, which is rampant on the left and right currently.
You failed at being tactful. Get off my post
Chappell Roan really was like "I won't endorse Harris because of the continuing genocide and the fact that the Democrats aren't protecting trans people. I am voting for Harris but won't endorse. You should expect more from your politicians and that's what I want before I endorse anyone" and got absolutely insane amounts of hatred and vitriol for that not only normal, but morally righteous take. And then because of aforementioned insane amounts of hate had to cancel shows due to mental health and then got MORE HATE. Like wow! Starting to think you don't want principled and authentic celebrities, don't care about women's feelings, and don't understand how mental illness affects people! It will entirely be entitled fans fault if she steps back forever from releasing music
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longwindedbore · 5 months ago
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** The math simply isn’t there to go this route, he said. In the committee, it would take either a bipartisan vote or a majority vote to subpoena Alito. The votes definitely aren’t there for a bipartisan vote, and it’s questionable if they’re there for a majority, he said. Beyond that, even if enough committee members agreed to subpoena Alito, it would take 60 votes in the full Senate to approve it. The votes aren’t there for that either, he said.
Durbin said there wasn’t much senators could do to enforce a subpoena against a Supreme Court justice anyway. **
Too bad the Dems aren’t corrupt piles of defecation masquerading as human like Mitch McConnnell who violated Senate rules incessantly.
I guess the two aparties aren’t the same?
An Anti-Red wave in 2024 won’t change anything the nature of the Senate.
Because only 34 of the Senate seats are up and only 10 are Republican. Eight of the Republican seats are in solidly Red & Rural States. The two urbanized States are Florida and Texas.
An Anti-Red wave has to retain its force through the 2026 midterms and the 2024 Presidential Elections to change the Senate. Only then the SCROTUS.
Historically, Progressives have blamed a Democratic Administration with its barely-a-majority in each Legislative House for the ‘failure’ to shove the Radical policies of a Radical minority down the throats of a resisting Majoity.
So the Progressive waves have tended to sit out the mid-terms. Handing the House(s) to the RepugnantKKKlans in 2022, 2014, 2010, 1994.
Only when there is some dramatic economic crises like 2006 will Progressives show up in the midterms.
The Repugnant Bigots understand they are a hated minority. That they are less than 50% of the GOP which is a smaller demographic than Independents who are smaller than registered voters.
So Bigots KNOW they have to vote every primary (usually less than a third of voters participate) so that they are the Majority of GOP selecting the November candidates.
They aren’t discouraged when they lose the Houses in the Presidential Election. In two years they’ll be the Majority that bothers to show up and vote.
So don’t blame the Bigots for why this country is fukked! They are a small minority whose ‘bubble of unreality’ is dependent on Inclusive Progressives living in their own ‘bubble of unreality’.
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