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baeshijima · 1 month ago

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— within uncertainty

sunday reflects on his limited time thus far on the express, only to find himself distracted by a face he has unknowingly become fond of.

CONTAINS : 1.2k wc, gn!reader, astral express member!sunday, fluff

A/N : chat have we seen the lc and gameplay leaks…? throwing up.

When Sunday first arrived on the Astral Express, a miniature gold and crimson ticket attached to his apparel, he wasn’t sure what to expect.

A new start; that much he was sure of. But with these people who instilled a newfound hope and courage to face the future, there was no shadow of a doubt within his heart and soul that he would encounter the unexpected more times than he can keep track of.

Sure enough, the unexpected came in many ways.

For one, March 7th’s uncanny ability to look at the bright side of things appeared so natural to her, so easy and simple. In recent times, he has found himself thinking about situations in a more positive light, no doubt a side effect of having spent time with her bubbly self.

He discovered Dan Heng’s aloof demeanour barely concealed his great care and affection for the crew— the Astral Express family. Even with what seems to be passive quips and dead-eyed stares, Sunday has begun to note the differentiations in his tone and body language, and all the subtleties he only shows with them.

He discovered the Trailblazer was every bit of a jokester as they are courageous, often finding himself staring blankly at some of their… seamlessly timed quips, to put it lightly. Even so, he’s oftentimes caught himself mid-admiration when they take charge in what they believe is right, wondering if he, too, could be like them in that aspect.

He found that Welt, while still retaining the righteous and strong spirit he displayed while in penacony, had a rather unprecedented charm. Sitting down for hours on end listening to the elder ramble passionately about animating, the arts, and endless theories about this universe wasn’t something he had ever planned for, but his heart warmed all the same at the burst of energy.

He came to realise the Express’ Navigator, Himeko, was certainly a… character. Brave, wise and humble were what he would use to describe her, even more so after her warmly welcoming him into the family. However, Sunday realised he could do without that… concoction she dubs a coffee.

He also never realised such a creature existed until he met Pom-Pom, much less one being a sentient conductor. Their nags are backed with overflowing affection for the members of the Express, often displayed through the meticulous care taken in the tailored meals and rooms and experience. There is so much love of the Astral Express, and Sunday wouldn’t be surprised if he were told most of it came from the Conductor.

(Though he does recall being warned by Dan Heng in particular to not anger the Conductor, an experience he is both curious about but also content in not knowing what exactly would transpire.)

And then there is you.

Sunday only caught a glimpse of you during the final moments of the conflict, much like with Himeko, so he didn’t have too much to go off of other than the fact you, just as it seemed to come with being a part of the Astral Express, were brave and fought for what you believed in.

(With you in particular, he found himself unable to forget your gaze — how it held a sparkling resolution and commanded his full attention, completely and utterly drawn in.)

Of course, that’s not to say you don’t embody those aspects now that he’s gotten to know you. Rather, you are so much more than what he could have ever imagined.

“Wow… they’re way softer than they look!”

…In more ways than one.

Sunday doesn’t really know how this situation came to be. He was merely idling around the Express in search of something to pass the time until you took note of his predicament, swooping in like the graceful saviour you are (self-proclaimed by you).

Somehow, in some way, that brought you both to his room.

It’s times like these where Sunday wholeheartedly believes the most forward member of the Astral Express isn’t that racoon-like Trailblazer, but rather you instead.

Seriously. How are you not embarrassed by this… this compromising position you’re both in?! He can practically feel the radius in which the heat from his face permeates!

“Do you, like, have a care routine for them or something?” you ask while gently thumbing individual feathers, because obviously this is only affecting him and him alone. “I refuse to believe your wings are like this naturally.”

He knows he gave you permission to touch them, but it doesn’t change the fact his wings are still sensitive. Aeon knows what you would do with that information; well, assuming you haven’t already picked up on his reactions towards your… ministrations.

“I do have a routine. I go to great lengths pruning and trimming my feathers. More than that…” he trails off, opting to ignore your mumbled comment of “Wow… you’re just like a bird then…”. He coughs, averting his eyes from your intensely gentle gaze, raising a fist to cover his lips. “Are you this forward with everyone?”

You blink. Once, twice, thrice. Somehow, the action makes Sunday fluster even further.

A hum leaves you as your lips purse and your head tilts in thought. “Well, I wouldn’t say everyone, exactly. Just those I consider to be very close to me. Oh,” you begin, as though realising something, “does it bother you? I’m so sorry!”

No— wait— why are you apologising?

“I didn’t realise I was making you uncomfortable! Oh gosh, I did it again…!”

You make a move to scramble away from him. Is it your frantic and unfocused eyes, or perhaps this uncharacteristic side of your usual confident and unabashed self which makes his heart lurch?

“I’m so, so sorry! I’ll keep my distance from now on and—!”

He acts before he can think.

“No!”

There’s a surge of panic which shoots into him. It makes itself known in the raw strain of his voice, in the shaky wide-eyed stare at the thought of you leaving, in the trembling grip he has your arm in.

Really, Sunday doesn’t know what he’s panicking about. He just knows a part of himself would never forgive him for unintentionally pushing you away like this.

A gasp escapes him after a few tense seconds which felt much more like an eternity. With haste, Sunday tears his hand away from your arm. Despite that, he remains in close proximity to you, mustering the courage to look at you once more.

“I… I mean, no, you’re not making me uncomfortable.” Sunday prays you didn’t hear the stammer in his words. And, if you did, then he hopes you don’t bring it up. “If I were feeling as such, I would have told you outright.”

The silence is absolutely suffocating. Even so, Sunday doesn’t dare look away from your stunned expression, not even when he’s almost positive his face is about to melt off from the sheer heat radiating from him.

“Oh.” You blink, expression falling into that of neutrality. A nod of understanding is your next action; understanding of what? Sunday has no clue — he’s not sure he even wants to know. “So you’re that type, huh. I see now.”

Nevermind. Maybe he does.

“…What does that mean? Wait— [Name], come back here! Explain what ‘that type’ means! Are you listening?!”

Suffice to say, Sunday never received a verbal response from you. Only your cheeky grin before you left and a plethora of butterflies fluttering amok within his stomach are all that remains.

Yeah. Sunday didn’t know what to expect when joining the Astral Express; in fact, he still doesn’t know what to expect. Despite being thrown into the unknown, he finds himself thinking this situation to not be so bad after all.

if you enjoyed this, reblogs and/or comments are greatly appreciated <33

#sunday x reader #honkai star rail x reader #hsr x reader #sunday x you #honkai star rail x you #hsr x you #honkai star rail imagines #hsr imagines

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synqiri · 3 months ago

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TODAY IS YESTERDAY'S TOMORROW.

in which dan heng falls in love with you, bit by bit, dawn after dawn.

PAIRING: dan heng x gn!reader

WARNINGS: none.

WORDCOUNT: 6.5K || CONTENT: slowburn, friends to lovers, fluff, slice of life, mild canon divergence (i had to dilate the timeline a bit)

NOTES: this took. months. rmb to leave a comment or reblog 🫶🏻🫶🏻 and thank u sm to my pookiewookie ren @lowkeyren who helped beta/proofread ‼️‼️💗💗

dan heng expects little, stepping onto the astral express.

the redhead woman — who he now knows as himeko — is but two steps behind, and when he meets her gaze, she only smiles. he isn’t quite sure of what he thinks of her. there hasn’t been much of an impression to make, from their departure off that ipc spacecraft to his arrival on the express.

“take a seat wherever you want,” she tells him, gesturing around the parlour car. “i’ll go and fetch the others. i’m sure they’ll be glad to meet you.”

he doubts that somewhat, but does as she says. he picks the seat at one of the round tables, facing the glittering expanse that is the universe beyond the window. he wonders if the luofu is within any of the galaxies he is looking at too.

the train’s conductor greets him first, before himeko returns. it introduces itself as pom-pom, and if he is any surprised at the sight, he does well not to show it.

“you must be the newest member of the crew,” a new voice pipes in.

his gaze snaps up to you immediately. he hadn’t noticed you walking up to him, which is odd, for he is normally far more attentive than that. he sweeps his eyes over you quickly. you’re dressed plainly, and much more casually than anyone he’s come across thus far. your hair is done just as simply. there’s a grin on your face, suave and bright.

you offer him a hand. “himeko mentioned you’d be coming. call me [name].”

“my name is dan heng.”

he returns your handshake, and you seat yourself across him.

“dan heng,” you repeat, deliberate and slow, as if you were testing the way his name rolls off your tongue. he feels your eyes on him just as his had been on you mere seconds before. “you have a nice name.”

glancing away, he speaks nothing in reply. what is he to say to that?

just then, himeko returns with a brunet man in tow, who introduces himself as welt yang. the greetings are kept brief, but now, he has acquainted himself with the entire astral express crew. together, everyone has lunch prepared specially by pom-pom themself.

when he is finished, you stand, and his gaze draws to you as you do.

“come with me,” you say, jerking a thumb toward the door on the other side of the parlour. “i’ll show you to your room.”

he stands, following suit. you decide to give him a tour of the express while you’re at it, walking him from one end of the train to the other. you have a way with words, he thinks, your silence never awkward and your chatter never grating.

“how long have you been a nameless?” he finds himself asking.

you hum, tilting your head slightly. “almost a year now, if i’m not wrong. before that, i spent about half a decade wandering the cosmos until himeko recruited me. what about you?”

he doesn’t quite know what to say. he had nowhere to go but the express, and he finds himself reluctant to tell you that.

at his complicated expression, you let out a low laugh. “you don’t have to answer that if you’re don’t want to. it’s all good — anyway, this is it. it’s a little bare now, but you’ll have time to decorate it as you please.”

sliding open the door, you reveal a simple, quaint bedroom specially prepared for him. it is not much different from a hotel room, but your words ring true. he’d have all the time in the universe to personalise it. that is, if he were to stay.

he shakes his head lightly. “there is no need. i’m only staying temporarily.”

“then, where else are you going to sleep?” you ask. raising a brow, the corners of your lips upturn just the slightest. “don’t tell me you’ll be sleeping in the archives?”

to your mild consternation, that is exactly where he chooses to sleep.

“are you sure you don’t want to use your bedroom?” you confirm with him for the nth time.

it is not as bad as you assume it is, really. it is infinitely better than many of the places he has slept in.

“i’m sure,” he tells you. “it’s not worth the hassle.”

—

a new dawn begins.

it is barely morning when dan heng steps out of the archives, bound for the kitchens. he hardly slept that night, only managing a fitful rest after hours of tossing and turning. the bed had been too soft, the silence too loud, and the calm too unnerving. it is… a lot to get used to.

he’d fix himself a simple breakfast before getting started on handling the data bank. that, is something he is looking forward to doing.

as he walks by your bedroom, he realises your light is on, its glow shining through the crack under the door. he isn’t expecting anyone else awake at this hour, much less you.

your door slides open just before he passes.

“oh, it’s just you.” you smile, and it is beneath the light he can see the bags under your eyes. he hadn’t paid enough attention to notice them yesterday. you lick your lips, and your voice is slightly coarse as you speak. “good morning. did you sleep well?”

“probably about as well as you did,” he returns.

you throw back your head and laugh, and he doesn't suppress the soft chuckle that leaves his lips either. shutting your bedroom door behind you, you decide to accompany him to the kitchens. he falls into step with you with ease.

“i never sleep well,” you tell him, combing your hair back with your fingers. “not anymore, at least.”

“do you have nightmares?” he asks tentatively.

you shake your head, waving your open palm in a so-so motion. “not really. maybe. one day, i just… couldn’t go to sleep anymore. you?”

he recalls all those nights on the rough, hard ground, chains around his limbs and a biting cold bone deep. any sleep he got had been stolen in slivers. after that, hopping from ship to ship, there hadn't been any chance for him to sleep more than an hour or two at a time. he nods. a good night’s rest was a luxury few seemed able to afford.

“the bed is… softer than i am accustomed to,” he finds himself admitting.

you let out a soft ah. “i know that feeling all too well.”

he goes silent then, and is thankful that you’re not one to pry. when the both of you arrive at the kitchens, he reaches for a loaf of bread. you put a hand on his arm before he can. he falters, glancing at you curiously.

“if you're not in a hurry, i can whip up something nicer to eat than just bread. i don't like to brag, but i’d say i cook pretty well.”

“it's alright. it’s nothing i’m unused to.” frankly, he’s had much worse. troubling you any further is simply unnecessary. “still, thank you. i appreciate the offer.”

you shrug with a crooked grin. “it’s your loss. at least toast the bread, won’t you?”

that, he can do. he even spreads jam over it.

days pass.

more and more mornings go by just the same, and the both of you fall into an easy routine. sometimes, the two of you talk and talk and talk until your coffee goes cold and his bread goes stale. sometimes, you don't exchange a word.

whatever the case, there is no doubt that you’ve become his friend.

he isn’t used to having friends. he isn't used to much of anything at all, really. he is stilted and awkward and stiff, and you are everything he is not — your grins come easy and your laughter rings carefree, your words charming and your movement fluid. it is obvious that whilst you are no older than he is, you have lived for far longer than he has.

whatever the case, he cannot deny that he enjoys being your friend.

“hey, we are friends, right?” you ask him one day, nursing a steaming mug of coffee in your hands.

he dips his head. “i would presume so. why do you ask?”

“nothing, nothing. i was just checking.” you smile then, wide enough your teeth show and the corners of your eyes crinkle. subconsciously, he smiles too. just the slightest. “i haven't had a friend for a very long time now.”

neither has he.

—

the process of revisiting the route is not easy, mostly due to the numerous roadblocks caused by stellarons. sometimes, the crew encounters the huge monsters dan heng had defeated before. you are swift, quick on your feet and even quicker with your blade. he watches as the beast is eviscerated to bits.

“you fight well,” he compliments you, and wonders for how long you have been fighting.

“aw, thanks — you don’t do too bad yourself,” you say.

he digresses. he had been careless, slipping too deep into the familiarity of a battle that he acted before he could think. yet that phantom memory was not his, and for that, he had almost been hurt. he can still feel the ghost of your touch on his wrist, from when you had pulled him out of an arrow’s path.

your voice draws him out of his thoughts then. “dan heng, watch this.”

grinning, you show off — tossing your daggers into the air, catching them with an elaborate twirl. after that, you sheath them as if nothing had ever happened at all. there’s something wild in your smile, vicious in your eyes. with the thrill of the fight still thrumming in your veins, you’ve never looked more alive.

noting the sweat that clings to your skin, he hands you a handkerchief before you resort to wiping it away with your sleeve. you take it, thanking him once more.

“i believe the entire area has been cleared. we should head back onto the express now.”

but you wave away his words, gaze trained on something behind him. “no, wait. not yet. what’s that?”

he turns, and all he sees is an enormous chunk of floating ice — encased in which is a living girl.

“you… truly do not remember a thing?”

the girl shakes her head, a frown marring her face. mr. yang had found a way to thaw the ice that enveloped her, and upon waking, a few major issues began to surface. namely, her amnesia.

“it’s all good,” you say kindly. “you’re welcome to stay for as long as you need. you can call me [name].”

she beams, accepting the offer, and with that, the crew gains another member.

“thank you! your name is really pretty, did you know that? mine is —” the smile on her face freezes. she falters. “mine is… uh… hm, do you have the date?”

“march 7th,” you supply helpfully.

dan heng steals a glance at you, surprised. he wonders what planet that calender system comes from. the astral express uses the one mandated by the ipc, and he had been taught the one of the xianzhou alliance. not that he ever had the chance to use it.

“you still keep track of the date of your home planet?” he asks.

shrugging, you nod. “yeah. old habits die hard, i’m afraid.”

“i guess you all can call me march 7th for now,” she says brightly. “to commemorate the day i was reborn.”

you laugh. “that’s cool. then, march 7th it is.”

—

a new dawn begins.

the astral express has stationed itself on herta’s space station for the time being, to help with its repairs, and to stock up on supplies. the girl with a stellaron sealed within her body — stelle, as she had dubbed herself — wanders both the express and the station, living as if it were her first time alive.

you seem particularly fond of her, dan heng notes.

he is being swarmed by a group of researchers whilst stelle sits in a corner, with you patching up her wounds. she had been fighting off a swarm of monsters in the storage facility alone, and the two of you only found her after the battle was basically over. then, the crowd began to gather before the three of you could return to the express.

“you’re the guard of the express, right?”

“i am, yes.”

“that’s so cool!”

he wonders how things have taken this turn. for the entire duration of the conversation, the researchers have been focused on nothing else but him. it’s unnerving. he cannot fathom their goal in doing so.

his gaze finds you easily. he watches as stelle leans over, muttering something he does not catch into your ear. you laugh, whispering back, and it is when you raise your head that your eyes meet his. amused, you raise a brow. he can read the question in your eyes.

need help?

shaking his head minutely, he suppresses the urge to glance away, mildly embarrassed at having been caught staring.

you shrug, mouthing. your loss.

someone else clears their throat, drawing his attention to him. a man, this time, who’s smile reminds him of yours.

“can i have your number?”

an arm slings around his shoulders then, before he can respond to the researcher’s request. he staggers slightly, and he can hear the murmured chuckle under your breath. he relaxes into it, almost instinctively.

oh, he thinks. it’s only you.

there’s a glint of mischief in your eyes, a wolfish grin tugging on your lips. you dip your head, murmuring something into his ear just as stelle had done to you earlier. what leaves your lips is an apology. but what for? he —

— you kiss him.

his ears ring. faintly, he can feel several pairs of eyes boring into him, into you, and into what seemed to be a lingering kiss. yet all he can wrap his mind around is the tip of your nose against his skin, your warm breath fanning over his cheek. it is not a kiss. it is not a kiss.

“sorry guys,” you declare, twirling back to face the group of researchers. they stare at you, stunned silent. you don’t mind a bit, your smile only brightening. “but he’s taken.”

disappointment ripples through the small crowd, and they disperse quickly after that.

sharply, he exhales. you release him from your hold hastily. stelle bursts into laughter.

“i’m sorry,” you say quickly. “you just looked like you needed help, and that was the fastest way to get them off your back. are you alright?”

he turns to you, dazed, body taut as a bowstring. he doesn’t think he’ll be alright for the next few system days, at the very least. “i — i’m alright. thank you for the assistance. though your method was certainly rather… startling.”

“that’s definitely one word for it,” stelle adds in, wiping a tear from her eye.

you roll your eyes. “stop being dramatic. they would’ve literally never stopped badgering him if they knew he was single.”

“what do you mean?” he finds himself asking. that was what they had wanted?

“i heard the lot of them making bets earlier, about who’d be first to get your number,” you explain. harrumphing, you continue, “but it’s not that i don’t see why. you are good looking.”

stelle grins. “tall, dark and mysterious?”

you choke out a laugh, giving her a high-five. “right.”

it is then he is glad that your attention is not on him at that very moment. he's bewildered and flustered all the same. good looking? tall, dark and mysterious…? the both of you might as well be speaking in riddles. offhandedly, he thinks that if it were up to him, you'd be the one more popular.

“anyway, let's head back to the express now. dan heng, you coming?”

he nods, following after you two steps behind. and even as you chatter with stelle, he can't seem to will away the memory of your face mere inches from his.

—

you have missed breakfast for the third time in a row and it is mildly distressing.

for five months has he been a passenger of the express, part of the astral crew, and for five months has dan heng had breakfast with you. he’s sure of that. though most days were repetitive and his memory blurred together, the morning was always a vivid constant.

“do you… know where [name] is?” he asks march that day, when she enters the archives in search of a book to read.

she lets out a soft hum, her head dipping to her side. “she's probably with stelle. they've grown really close recently! why?”

“just curious,” he replies, casually. “it is unusual for [name] to not already be up at this hour.”

march laughs. “you know lots about [name], huh? by the way, how long have you two known each other? are you close?”

“it's only been a few months. we are friends.”

the door slides open then, and your presence filters through the air. he can see the grin on your face before he even turns to look. you seem to have awoken mere minutes beforehand, hair mussed and eyes slightly droopy with sleep.

“just friends?” you say, pouting playfully. “i thought we were best friends, at the very least.”

he says nothing to that, and march can't seem to stifle a giggle. swiftly, she plucks a book off a shelf and scampers away. he meets your gaze then, and you raise an eyebrow in question.

“you missed breakfast,” he says simply.

wincing lightly, you bring a hand to the base of your neck, expression sheepish. “ah. ‘m sorry, i overslept.”

“it’s alright,” he reassures you, gaze following your figure as you glide further into the archives.

you jerk a thumb at his makeshift bed. “mind if i sit?”

he doesn’t. he shakes his head in reply, and with one smooth, sweeping motion, you settle yourself onto it. you move with a comfortable fluidity, so much so he assumes you have long since grown accustomed to things as simple as this. pressing down on his mattress, you watch it gradually regain its shape. then, you fluff up his pillow.

“i can’t believe you live like this,” you grumble, shooting him a dirty look. “there’s a perfectly good room for you to use.”

he huffs. “this arrangement is only —”

“only temporary, yeah, yeah, i know.”

with that, the topic is dropped there, and you move onto something else. you’ve recently been busy gaming with stelle, you tell him, oftentimes late into the night. you’d play and play and play until the moon dipped and the sun rose, until the two of you would black out from sheer exhaustion.

“that… doesn’t sound very healthy,” dan heng comments, a faint frown marring his face. “you should adopt a more consistent sleep schedule.”

you laugh, waving his words away. with a soft fwump, your back hits his bed, your arms spread wide and tangled in his sheets. you meet his gaze with a lazy, half-quirked smile. “sure, i’ll try. but honestly? i’ve slept more in the past few days than i’ve slept in years.”

he only sighs. “whatever you say.”

he decides to carry on with his work, to before he had been interrupted by march and then you. he seats himself at his desk whilst you lounge on his bed. at first, you watch as he pores over books and archives, adjusting, keying in new entries, but you soon grow bored of it and turn your attention towards your phone.

“not gonna lie, your mattress is more comfortable than i expected,” you say suddenly. “it’s soft.”

it is. he can’t help but let out a soft chuckle.

hours pass. a comfortable sort of silence has blanketed the room, after the short bouts of chatter he’d share with you died down and the sounds your game emits turn to nothing but white noise. he isn’t used to having someone in the room with him as he works, nor is he accustomed to spending so much time with someone alone.

it isn’t bad, he muses.

dinnertime approaches. he sets his pen down, getting up from his seat as he does. turning to you, he finds himself setting eyes upon an unexpected sight.

you’re fast asleep, body twisted into odd angles but asleep nonetheless. your phone lies against your cheek, and you’ve somehow kicked his blanket onto the floor. he doesn’t know whether to wake you or to leave you be.

he sighs. he supposes you’d need all the sleep you could get.

picking up the blanket, he sets it over your figure gently, careful not to rouse you. he then leaves for the parlour carriage.

he bumps into stelle along the way.

“is [name] not having dinner today?” she asks. “weren’t they with you?”

dan heng shakes his head lightly in response. “[name] fell asleep. i decided against waking them up.”

she nods approvingly. “that’s good.”

—

a new dawn begins.

dan heng’s steps are light as he leaves the grand goethe hotel, only slightly behind march and stelle. the air is crisp, the sunlight warm, and light breeze teases the ends of his hair. it will be a good day, he thinks, almost certain.

the crisis in belobog has just recently been resolved with the help of the astral express crew. now, there is little left to do but enjoy the celebrations and festivities. even you will be disembarking from the express and meeting them for lunch.

you hadn’t joined him on the expedition this time, opting to give stelle the chance to. it has been an odd few days without you around, he muses. he hadn’t realised just how used he had become to your presence until you were gone.

whatever the case, you’d be here soon, and that is all that matters for now.

“i can’t wait to see everyone again!” march says, grinning. she practically skips down the street, twirling and humming as she does. “it feels like it’s been ages since we last saw them.”

stelle voices out her agreement. then, she suggests introducing the rest of the crew to the friends they have made in belobog. “[name] would love clara.”

he can’t help but smile at that. you would.

“how was the mission?” you ask, casually, a smile on your face as you stir your drink with a straw. “the other two said they had fun. stelle even has a new set of powers now.”

dan heng can’t quite say the same, but overall, it was definitely an interesting experience, and he tells you as much. very briefly, he recounts all the events that have occurred from the moment the trio set foot onto jarilo-iv to the moment cocolia had been defeated. you listen with a child-like curiosity, eyes sparkling and all.

the both of you are seated at a table in the administrative district, chatting over food and drinks. march and stelle left earlier, claiming they wanted to speak with everyone once more, whilst himeko and mr yang had yet to disembark from the express.

“damn,” you say, a tad mournfully. “i would’ve paid to have seen y’all go against cocolia.”

and that is precisely what he doesn’t understand. you’d have enjoyed the expedition as much as everyone else had, and the team certainly had room for one more, so why hadn’t you simply joined them?

it seems you read his silent question right off his expression, and you sigh, glancing away with a helpless sort of smile.

“it was kind of cowardly, i admit,” you utter lowly. you’re murmuring, yet the bustle of the city fades into nothing but white noise, and he can clear your words clear as crystal. “still, seeing jarilo-iv in that state… i couldn’t bear to step foot on it until i heard the stellaron was gone. the snow reminded me too much of home. or at least, what used to be home.”

“your home planet?” he clarifies. a slight frown tugs at his brows. it isn’t like you to look so sombre. it’s worrying.

you nod. “yeah. y’know, where i come from, there used to be this saying about impossible things that would only happen ‘when hell freezes over’. guess what? it did. within weeks, my home became nothing but a chunk of ice. of billions, probably only a few hundred escaped.”

his mind draws to a blank there. his lips part, but nothing comes out. what can he say to that? he sighs lightly, weary, akin to the sound of yours. “would… would it be insensitive to say i’m glad that it was you of all people who survived?”

a sharp huff of a laugh flits from your lips, and the expression on your face has brightened considerably. you smile, and he returns it almost unwittingly.

“no, not at all,” you reply. “i’m glad i survived too. i wouldn’t have been able to meet you or the rest of the crew if i hadn’t. anyway, it’s all in the past now. i’m more or less over it.”

then, you’re leaning toward him, eyes sparkling once more.

“what about you? what’s your origin story?”

“it’s… a lot,” he tells you truthfully. huffing, he averts his gaze, face strangely warm. “i’d rather not dwell on it. the day i left my homeworld, i left my past behind and haven’t looked back since.”

you let out an understanding hum, taking a sip of your drink.

“of course. after all, you can’t have your past following you into your future.”

—

dan heng awakens with a jolt, a chill lapping at his spine and cold sweat prickling at his skin. his body aches, head leaden, the traces of a life long past ringing in his ears. it is the third night in a row he has not slept.

he doesn't bat an eye at the person shuffling around by his desk, for it can be no one but you. still, he is not one without shame, and mild embarrassment at having been caught in such an unseemly state tinges his cheeks.

“nightmare?” you ask, knowing and gentle and wry. “wanna talk about it? march says it helps, but i wouldn't say for sure.”

you're draped over his chair, head propped up by a hand. there are faint shadows under your eyes and books scattered carelessly across the desk, and he assumes you had spent the entire night before right there. he had been reading, he recalls, and you had been studying the data bank for any information it had on the xianzhou alliance.

that stellaron hunter, kafka… unthinkably, his past has caught up with him in the form of her visit. he hasn't been able to rest easy since.

“nothing much, just… old memories,” he says.

you let out a soft hum. “about the xianzhou alliance?”

he startles slightly. how did you…?

“you have a slight accent,” you explain, shrugging. “it’s cute. i had a few other guesses, of course, but your reaction to kafka confirmed it for me. anyway, i know you don't like talking about your past, so i wasn't gonna bring it up unless you did.”

he can't help but let out a soft, breathless laugh. what is he to say to that? it seems you know him better than he had thought. offhandedly, he wonders if he knows you just the same.

“will you go?” you ask. at his questioning glance, you elaborate. “to the luofu with the others. i’ll be going as well.”

he shakes his head, sighing near inaudibly. “i'll be staying on board the express this time. the luofu is a grand and beautiful ship that i barely had the chance to see but… i can never return.”

a beat of silence follows his statement, and for a second, he worries he may have said something odd. he glances at you, meeting your gaze, and you get up from your seat then, stretching as you do. offering him a hand that he accepts, you pull him up with an easy grin.

“that’s good. you can keep me company while stelle and march are out.”

a faint smile flickers across his face at that, the slight tension in the room ebbing away. it wouldn't be very much different from how the both of you usually spent your days anywayy.

true to your word, you don't mention a thing about the xianzhou alliance after that. he follows you to the kitchens to grab a bite of breakfast. it’s barely dawn, he realises, and in the stillness of the express, it seems as if the universe contained no one else but you.

“you hungry?” you ask, already pulling out ingredients from the fridge. “i’ll make something simple. i don’t think you’d have much of an appetite right now either way, huh?”

he takes a seat at the aisle, letting out a soft hum in reply. “alright, sounds good. thank you.”

“of course. anything for you.”

he glances away, out into the expanse of the galaxy, a odd sort of warmth blooming within him. he doesn’t recall ever having felt this way, but… he supposes it is not an unwelcome development. he can’t help but smile.

“how is it?” you ask, hands interlaced together as you watch him expectantly.

the half hour you took to prepare breakfast had been whiled away in an instant, with light conversation and comfortable silence. he takes a bite out of it, and he’s pleasantly surprised.

“it’s good.”

you beam, pleased, gently urging him to have more. “i knew you’d like it. i was on my own for years before i joined the express, y’know? eventually, i got sick of eating plain rice and whatnot, so i learnt to cook.”

he dips his head in acknowledgement. he had never been particularly picky with what he ate, for he never really had the chance to enjoy food. still, even he can tell that your cooking is more than stellar.

“you cook well,” he says.

you laugh. “then, that settles it. i’ll make you something nicer next time.”

—

a new dawn begins.

“you know, when you mentioned your past being ‘a lot’, i’d never expect it to be this.”

dan heng lets out a low, shuttered breath. everything had happened too quickly, and it was only one thing after another, then another, until his origins had been laid bare for all to see. it’s odd, he thinks. it’s uncomfortable and familiar just the same. his true form, his true strength, his true self. he wonders what you think of him now.

the situation on the luofu has concluded, but everyone is still reeling from the aftermath. march and stelle opted to stay at the seat of divine foresight with the general to tie up loose ends, whilst he and you decided to get going first.

you walk in step with him through stargazer navalia, on the way to pick up a starskiff that would return you to the express. you huff. “stelle has new powers, and you regained your old ones — don’t tell me it’ll be march’s turn next?”

“she did mention she wished to pick up swordsmanship,” he offers.

“she’ll look cute with a sword,” you say, the sound of a laugh on the tip of your tongue. then, you turn to him, and he can feel the weight of your gaze on his skin before he even meets your eye. “jokes aside though, you feeling alright?”

“i feel fine,” he confirms. “just… tired.”

you nod understandingly. “of course. it's been a few very, very long days. i feel like i could fall asleep right this second.”

the two of you reach the port, and come to a console that would summon a starskiff. he keys in the coordinates to the astral express for you. even then, he can feel your eyes on him, steady, and everburning. he can tell you have something to say.

“what is it?” he asks softly.

your head dips to a side slightly, a tiny, glittering smile on your face. “is it bad i think you look even prettier now? like, don’t get me wrong, you've always been good looking — but this? it's just… wow.”

he flusters, an unbearable heat crawling up his nape and dusted on his cheeks. partly due to the fact you find him attractive, but more so the fact you always have. he can't quite believe it, but who are you to lie? your word has always been true.

his lips part, but no words leave, and you tap the top of your head, then gesture to his. “mind if i touch?”

he shakes his head lightly. he doesn't.

one of your hands reaches to cup his cheek, and he leans into it instinctually. your other hand tangles itself in his hair, near the base of his horns. when your fingers trail the length of his scales, he shudders.

“it's feels cold,” you comment, voice barely a murmur. “it's very pretty.”

with his head in your hands, he couldn't have avoided your gaze even if he tried. he looks up at you through heavy-lidded eyes, and seeing this, you only grin in return. perhaps it is his exhaustion, or perhaps it is merely wishful thinking, but your eyes sparkle with a warmth he chooses to mistake for affection.

“when you're ready… will you tell me about your past? i only caught bits and pieces earlier, and i’d much rather hear the full story from you.”

he dips his head in agreement. either way, there isn’t much left of the story left to tell, and even then, if anyone had to know, it would be you.

the starskiff arrives then, and with that, the moment flickers away.

you get into the ship first, and he's only a step behind you as you do. it's not very spacious, he notes, but it is good enough for two.

“you can rest your eyes for awhile,” you tell him, patting the space on the seat next to you. “the express is still a few hours away.”

he smiles faintly. “don't mind if i do.”

dan heng doesn’t remember falling asleep, but he does remember waking up.

it's comfortable, he thinks, mind hazy, sleep still lapping at the edges of his consciousness. his head rests against something soft, his tail curled around something warm. a hand taps on his shoulder gently.

“hey, it’s time to get up.”

reality clicks back into place in seconds. his tail unfurls itself from your waist, and you stretch, standing, offering him a hand that he accepts.

“did you sleep well?” you ask, something knowing in your smile, a hint of a laugh in your eyes. “you looked so comfortable, i almost didn't have the heart to wake you.”

he doesn't recall ever sleeping so well before. he nods.

“i did.”

—

“psst. hey, dan heng,” march whispers to him, urgently. she glances around in an exaggerated motion of secrecy, then relaxes when she seems to have found nothing of concern.

dan heng gives her an odd look. there is no need for her to whisper. in fact, her hushed tone of voice makes it difficult for him to make out against the hustle and bustle of aurum alley. the both of them were in charge of keeping track of the shipments that were coming and going, whilst you and stelle were off planning the cycrane's delivery routes.

he asks, “what is it?”

“are you and [name] dating?”

the question bursts out of her near explosively, as if it had been bubbling within her for quite some time now. he startles slightly, never having expected something like that to come from her.

“no, we aren't,” he tells her, brows drawn faintly. “where did you get that idea?”

“you aren't? but i thought…” her eyes are widened comically, and she has her hand brought up to her face to stifle a gasp. she huffs then, coming to her senses, placing her hands by her waist. “i was sure you liked each other. stelle thought so too. i mean — it's all there!”

he sighs, rolling his eyes, yet an odd, fluttering feeling rushes across his skin. a tiny dash of thrill, he suspects, and a little pinch of something more. he wonders if stelle is asking you the same right that second. he wonders what you'd respond.

“you can ask [name] yourself,” he replies instead.

she grumbles. “well, if you say so…”

“march asked if we were dating.”

the words leave dan heng's lips before his mind even has the time to catch up with them. he had been stewing over his conversation with march for the entire day. it had sent him reeling. now, all the work that had to be completed has finally been done and dusted, and he finally has time with you alone. as always, you have made yourself at home in the archives, feet on his desk and draped across his chair as if it were your very own.

you turn to him, surprised, an eyebrow raised. you let out a startled laugh. “she did?”

“she also said stelle thought the same,” he confirms.

out of sheer interest, you swivel yourself around to face him, cross-legged, hugging the chair's back. he sits himself down on his bed, and pretends not to notice your stare.

“so, what did you say?”

really, what else was he to say? he supposes he can understand where they were coming from. of everyone in the crew, you are the one he is closest to. you are the one he trusts the most, and you are the one that knows him the best. not only that, those facts extend both ways. with all that said, it really wasn't any surprise that they had jumped to conclusions. the both of you almost acted the part already.

he shrugs, a tad awkwardly. “i told her that we weren't.”

“shame,” you say, a slight lilt in your tone. you pout. “not even a chance? you know, when stelle asked, i told her i wouldn't mind either way.”

you chuckle at the look on his face. “think about it. would it really change anything whether or not we do? other than the labels, of course, but just because we aren't dating doesn't mean i like you any less.”

no, he supposes. there wouldn't be much of a difference at all. he's never really thought about it that way.

his relationship with you is… unique, in a sense. be it as a friend, lover, or companion, you've become such an irrevocable part of his life that any instance without you just felt off. and somehow, he had gone from merely living one day after another to dreaming of the next dawn with you.

… he wonders just when had he fallen in love.

“if that is the case,” he starts slowly, “then… i'd rather be known as your lover too.”

your lover, he thinks, testing it out in his mind. though it may just mean all the same to you, he can’t help but find a soft comfort in that title. yours.

he shoots you a mildly dubious look. “do you even know what a relationship entails?”

“of course i do,” you declare, puffing up proudly. the grin on your face is as silly as it is radiant, and you blow him a big, fat kiss. “what else is there to do but make you happy?”

dan heng laughs, expecting little else. to be honest, you already do.

fin.

#dan heng x reader #hsr x reader #honkai star rail x reader #dan heng #honkai star rail #hsr #(✒️)— writing.

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