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hoseoksluna · 6 months ago

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SMOKE, i. | myg

pairing: idol!yoongi x smoke!oc (ft. bangtan)

genre: angst

word count: 6.8k

summary: everything that begins also ends.

pinterest board: smoke / taglist: join

warnings: suicide ideation, yoongi has deep feelings that he hasn't felt in a long time, sexual innuendos, yoongi has brief dirty thoughts, alcohol consumption, talks of alcohol, social anxiety and feelings of anxiety in general, jungkook has mint hair, covid and the pandemic, talking to a dead loved one, jealousy, envy, anger, crying, yoongi's bad shoulder.

note: welcome to the brand new yoongi series! i can't believe this baby is alive and ready for you to read. i struggled with this a lot, since it's written in a way i've never tried before. yoongi's pov, first person—like what? i thought this chapter was pretty shitty as i didn't feel comfortable writing in this style, but i pushed through, felt like it was meant to be—which is why i need tons of your validation. i was also kinda sad today, so please send your love. :( fyi, jungkook may be a huge part of the beginning of this story, but this is not steam pt 2. jungkook won't be present as much later on. no polyamory here. *spoiler* he just brought oc to yoongi and then he will lovingly go away, dw. :) enjoy this first chapter, i can't wait for many more! kisses.

side note: happy bday to us! mwah.

It was a bang, what happened in our group.

A bomb that blew off in Jungkookie’s trembling hands when he shared the news. A decision that wasn’t really collectively discussed, not even privately with Namjoon—but an information that erupted among us as we sat in the lounge room of the venue, refreshing ourselves with snacks and drinks after the tough soundcheck we had. I had a bottle of Hennessy in my hands myself, about to pour myself some liquid courage in order to chase away the bitter ire I had swirling in my veins, but hearing his words made me forget about the nectar right away.

He was bringing along a female friend for the tour.

The ire turned sour in my bloodstream.

He must’ve lost his mind.

And what’s worse, I was the only one who looked at him as if he were a lunatic. The members squealed and hollered, clapping their hands, shouting different variations of words of, “Jungkookie got a girlfriend!” that made him blush so profusely that he wasn’t able to reciprocate any of our eye contact.

Especially not mine.

I was fuming, taking breaths that hurt my lungs. The bottle of liquid courage damn nearly broke, but I didn’t feel a thing. How could I—when amidst the ruckus and the soft smiles of our staff my feelings parted and melted into a crossroad that I began to stand in the middle of.

One way led to selfishness, the other to the very polar opposite of it.

Jungkook didn’t deal with the pandemic well. His skin was invariably lined with a certain sensitivity towards forlornness and when the mandate forced upon him a pressure of being abandoned—by us and by his long time flirt that was the driving force behind his creativity, besides Army themselves—he didn’t take it well. Crawled inside himself, even deeper within when our management canceled our Map of the Soul tour and we had to stay bricked up inside our homes for a full year.

He was crestfallen and despondent, a decaying human. No girlfriend, no Army. No band members to slap his back, cook him food and distract his mind from the loneliness.

Except for me.

I was the one who made time for him. Who visited him, despite our management’s strong disliking for it. I went around them and did it without anyone’s knowledge but Jungkook’s. With a mask and health in perfect condition that I took care of more for him than for anyone else. Our relationship blossomed to highs that overgrew the bricked walls of our mandatory, artificial castle. A peach honeysuckle vine that we watched as much as we could while I wrote poems to him in my heart to alleviate his ache. It was spring and one, singular hummingbird would fly in to listen to my words while inhaling the sweetened perfume of those pale orange flowers or the fragrance of the natural honey I would buy him and pour over the pancakes I would make for him. A comfort food, a symbol of our secret meetings. A butterfly would sit on the small creature’s back, just to look over its wings and be a witness to a mind’s mending, an afternoon’s tea mixed with dark liquor that would always fade to noraebang.

The key to Jungkook’s heart.

I don’t know how the little fella found us, but I wish his wings would sense us here. There’s no windows for him to look out of, but the craving in me for it to fly in and save the day, remind Jungkook who’s been here for him this whole time, blossoms in me just like those peach flowers.

The castle has collapsed a tiny bit, but the honeysuckle remains untouched.

Or at least I hope so.

The other, non-selfish way is simple. Our work had been put off for so long and now that we’re able to pick it back up—in a way that isn’t as satisfactory as I’d want it to be, of course, for the only faces we’ll be seeing beyond the stage are the ones of camera lenses, not the ones belonging to our beautiful Army—there’s a distraction, an external person who could never understand the gravity of that pain we all went through.

This was supposed to be a precious time shared between us. Another mending of some sort—as our job is the chambers of our hearts.

And now as I look at her, I feel her playing with those strings of my heart like a harp. And I have that terrible feeling that she will open the doors to each chamber and ruin everything we’ve worked so hard for.

In spite of the fact that she didn’t do anything wrong. It’s a gut feeling that consumes me and I can’t do a thing about it, not even admit that it gives me the tiniest hint of a thrill that I’ve been craving for so long.

Jungkook wasn’t the only one affected by the loneliness that came with the mandate. I gave my all to him and always walked out of his door empty—with no one to refill me.

Performing again was supposed to do the job, but it seems as though she’s come in to hijack it.

Announcement, the ruffling of his hair and multitudes of teasing aside, we had an hour and half left until the beginning of our first show in Seoul. Jungkook left us, with cheeks as darkened as poppies in the summer, with a staff member and our bodyguard to pick her up at a designated meeting spot nearby. He hadn’t eaten all day—not before our dismal soundcheck and certainly not during our hair and makeup session. A ribbon of worry curled tightly in my gut that unfurled once he filled his plate with hotdogs after introducing her to us.

No shaking of hands, only Jungkook’s hand pointing at each member while his mouth gave life to their names. And she didn’t nod her head, not even once, as she moved to greet and smile at every face, which caused me to think that she either already knew of us, either due to our popularity or due to Jungkook’s stories—or both.

But when it was my turn, her smile faltered.

I didn’t see much of her face, for she wore a black mask. And the only part of her features I was able to see spoke to me in a foreign language I was too pissed off to decipher.

Feline eyes.

Round and wispy, so terribly cat-like that it cut through my heartstrings she played with and then abandoned. She held my gaze so unfathomably deeply and it wasn’t until she whisked her eyes away that I realized she, irrevocably, clutched time in her hands. It had stopped during that brief moment and resumed as if nothing happened.

It unnerved me.

As did my strange feelings as I took in the personality of her outer form.

She wore a long silky dress, as black as her energy and her hair nearly akin to the length of that garment. Its hem brushed against her ankles with every movement she made and her feet were shod in a pair of heels that would puncture my heart if she so much as wished so. Over her shoulder hung a matching, leather purse and I noticed something that bruised, most peculiarly, my flesh.

The clasp of her chain strap had a chubby Grookey Pokémon caged as a keychain.

I found it as adorable as absolutely dangerous. Still do as my eyes can’t help but to watch it twirl.

She’s a dangerous black cat, with her claws tucked in. And the entire night coils in her eyes, dressing her in innocence and a simultaneous seductiveness that make my lungs swell.

A quintessence of beauty, she is.

After the introduction is over, Jungkook pulls out a chair for her beside him, sitting down and not wasting a second as he stuffs his mouth full with one of the hotdogs. The monkey bounces with her movement and it’s only now that my brain puts two and two together. The monster almost matches the minty tinge of Jungkook’s dyed hair with its plump, green body.

None of them know that I match him, too.

A leaf of the same plant swirls in my glass of whiskey.

And the notion of iciness that it adds to the bitterness of the liquid turns to ash in my mouth as I take a sip. I, myself, sit on the armrest on the couch, alone—but not alone physically. Hobi rests, leisurely, next to me and she’s stolen glances at him more times than I like. Looked at him while completely avoiding the ring of protectiveness I’ve conjured around myself.

She does good, but it spreads fire to the strangeness of my feelings that I can’t name.

Is she throwing a rope around another one of the boys? Her claws itching to rise?

Who’s next?

I sigh as she laughs, softly, at something Namjoon says and it deepens my ire. Namjoon should’ve made order as the leader of our group. Should’ve said no to Jungkook at the unfolding of his news and keep the number of our group to seven. Especially when our time together is this precious.

Not chatting her up and coaxing that wonderful sound out of her.

“Can we get you anything to drink?” Namjoon asks, waving his hand in the direction of the alcohol station out far in the left corner of the lounge room. A mint plant mocks me as my eyes flick to it while I take another sip. The reason why it’s there in the first place is because Jimin likes his mojitos.

He sips on it like it’s a Capri-Sun as I swallow the dark liquid after swirling it in my mouth for a moment, the bitterness doing nothing to stifle my ire.

“No,” she says, feebly, brushing her fingers down the length of her ebony hair before tossing it over her shoulder, giving me a perfect look of one singular strand that has been dyed in the same pale green color that is suffused all though Jungkook’s hair. The shade, but darker, more sinister, imbues my blood with envy. It’s not that soft color, redolent of spring meadows, by any chance. It’s an ancient, vague memory of a forest once in full bloom that is now withering and dying at dusk. How long has he been seeing her that they reached this base? “I don’t drink hard liquor, but thank you.”

Namjoon licks his lips, spreading his arms over the two empty chairs beside him. “Ah,” he laments, smiling at her, gently. “You don’t drink at all?”

Jungkook lifts his head from his plate, laughing through his nose as he chews his food, his mouth forming into that bunny smile of his. He knows something I don’t and my green blood boils.

The cat girl grins, her head twisted in Jungkook’s direction when she laughs, the skin under her chin rounding out, and my chest tightens in endearment at the sight of it.

The cutest fucking double chin I ever have the eyes to see.

Fuck.

“Oh, she drinks,” Jungkook says, his words muffled due to his full cheeks, the food inside showing as he continues to be all smiles.

The cat girl pinches his arm, but owing to the thick fluffiness of his jumper, she doesn't reach skin, and therefore doesn't inflict the pain she intended. Jungkook pretends to moan in pain, anyway. My chest tightens again—this time for a beat longer.

An oddity flies through my vision, slicing through my envy.

Her claws sinking into my bare skin as I let her playfulness out—

I shake that picture out of my head as quickly as it arrives, running my fingers through my strands that had fallen in front of my eyes. The girl helps my effort by speaking, distracting me from the faint rush of lust that begins to course down my body.

I can’t get hard.

“Yeah, I only drink wine,” she reveals, coyness entwining around her tone, and she kneads her hands, struggling with her straight posture.

Another distraction, one that softens, most peculiarly, my lust.

If I were born with deaf ears, I would’ve known she was fighting through her shyness by one glance at her body language and I don’t blame her.

She doesn’t have only seven pairs of eyes watching her. She’s the apple of fifteen more if I include our staff, sound engineers and our management.

If I weren’t the person I was and if this wasn’t my job, I would have run the first chance I got. A certain admiration envelops my heart the more I study her toy with her fingers, soothingly, because of a reason that aches to admit.

A reason far from plain.

She’s the same as me. Uncomfortable by and disliking any public event with people involved, especially if you’re put in a position to talk.

A bond forms and I can’t stop it. I can’t rip it apart even as I willfully try in my headspace to cut off that red string tied around my heart, leading to hers. I can’t because she eventually slouches, giving up, her spine protruding towards me through the open back of her dress, for she’s turned her body towards Namjoon, who sits at the head of the table, but I figure she did it in order to be closer to Jungkook to gain some comfort from him. The skin of her back is refulgent and tanned, scattered with little blemishes that connect, like constellations, to a night sky full of birthmarks, and that only add to her beauty.

Her whole back is filled with them, stirring my wonder. And, unknowingly, she let me see by sweeping her hair to one side. I wonder if Jungkook has seen them and appreciates them as much as I do—

Jungkook burps, obscenely loudly, setting down Hobi’s unfinished can of Sprite that he left on the table. I’m sure Hobi’s regretting making that mistake, but when I look at him, he’s smiling so widely that I can see his gums and I’m so astounded by that view that I’m thrown off my balance.

Even more so, when I check the reactions of the other members and begin to feel shame descending down my own spine like cold sweat. Jimin has hearts thumping in his eyes, raising his hand in the girl cat’s direction, connecting with her as he says he loves a good bubbly. Taehyung, sitting on the direct opposite side of Jungkook by the table with his arms crossed and his face flushed intones that tonight after the show he will break his sobriety streak. Jin joins the table and flicks Taehyung’s forehead, tells him he doesn’t have to break anything while taking a huge bite of his banana. And Namjoon… he laughs, hands intertwined upon the back of his head.

The whole table laughs, in fact.

Hobi does beside me, too.

I’m the only one who doesn’t, steeped in my uncertainty as I am.

They all bask in comfort and gaiety. There’s no awkwardness, no unspoken words or silence that hangs heavily in the air. There’s no need for our hummingbird; no need to change directions, play pretend or act accordingly to the new situation because there’s absolutely nothing new about the atmosphere I find myself to be in. Everything is as if it were just the seven of us.

Making jokes, lighthearted energy, connections lengthening and digging deep…

I haven’t seen that, been a part of that in so long.

I was wrong��and the shame, stemming from my wrong impression and unwarranted fear, washes out the envy from my blood. It stands, arm to arm, with my life-long emptiness and I bow my head down, licking my lips.

I wish to exit myself out of this room.

I wish my heart wasn’t so sensitive.

I wish—

“It’s her birthday today and I bought so many bottles of champagne and wine,” Jungkook says, running his tongue over his teeth, and my head lifts; my heart enlarges before it shrinks, painfully, magnifying my shame until it grazes the flesh like a shard. It’s her birthday? “I’ll need your help, guys. We’re not celebrating here tonight. After the show, we’re going to my place.”

It’s not peach honeysuckle that I’m thinking of. Not pancakes. Not our hummingbird and butterfly as the boys cheer all over again, wishing her happy birthday.

It’s her that I’m thinking of.

And how much I messed up.

He brought her here to make her birthday special—to be with her on the day that carries her name, not to replace me.

It explains why she’s so magnificently dressed up; why she’s putting her feet through so much pain in those heels of hers.

Just for one night. And I’ve managed to ruin it so majestically with my energy. No wonder she won’t look at me; no wonder her eyes won’t even sweep past me en route to Hobi’s chocolate fountain that his eyes emanate.

Mine are nothing but death. I don’t blame the decline of her smile as her pools met it. A kitty cat that looked at the face of a skull. It symbolized the end of time and now I perceive that it epitomizes the end of me.

The longer she’s present, the more I loosen the consuming negativity that I’ve lived for so long in compliance with—because now I’m soft.

I’m gutted I made her feel awful to be here with my dark energy.

“Jungkook, you should’ve told us that was the reason why you brought her along. We would have welcomed you with a happy birthday song,” Namjoon says, his palm lifted towards Jungkook and her while his other hand reminds behind his head.

I can’t see her smile. Not even a hint of it in her eyes, for this time around she doesn’t turn around to steal a glance at Hobi. And I wish she would, with a strength that I’m in awe that I’m even possessing, because I find myself yearning to look at her face, amidst my softness.

I misjudged her so terribly that the yearning doubles as she presses her hands against her cheeks amidst the overbearing attention. Becomes a need—a need to fix what I so unfairly have broken.

And jealousy thunderstrikes in my system when Jungkook bumps his shoulder into hers, gently, his head tipped low, fixed in her direction as she struggles, once again, in her shyness. Straightens her spine just in time for Jungkook to curl a finger around her ear and take off her black mask.

I’m so jealous everyone else gets to see her face fully that indignation supersedes my past ire and my softness and I’m quickly up on my feet, ready to walk out to breathe in some fresh air but something else steps into my plan.

And it’s not her.

It could never be her.

Staffs members circle around us, guiding us out of the room to wire us up. But I stall my time, purposefully staying behind so I can look at her. I pretend to exercise my pain from my shoulder surgery by rolling it and making a face. Jungkook whispers something to her, her face pointed upwards as he stands before her while she remains sitting and I’m so bothered by it that it calls out the pain, incites it to come haunt me again.

Everyone else had something to say to her—and yet I still haven’t, owing to my foolish mistake. Self-hatred fastens to my anger and I can’t breathe, my lack of knowing what to say to her when the time comes worsening my feelings.

The boys leave the room and it’s just me and her. The staff member knows not to push me, but the pressure in her eyes is the driving force that takes my legs to the kitty girl.

She sits so awfully forlornly in her chair, reminds me so much of Jungkook, her spine back to slouching, that marvelous pillar protruding again and my lungs do that thing they seem to automatically do whenever I see that part of her.

She hears my footfalls as I approach her, but she doesn’t turn around. I ignore the way it makes me feel, the heaviness that comes with it, too. She, in most probability, thinks I’m walking out of this room without saying a word to her, but I’m not capable of that.

Not anymore.

I call out her name and, in surprise, she lifts her spine. Turns around, at last, the sleek fabric of the dress adding swiftness to the movement and I see her face. Her full mouth that compliments, most perfectly, her big feline eyes. And I think about how much her dark, sensual energy doesn’t mirror her personality, her coyness that hides inside until someone speaks to her. Her chin is so small that my fist would still be empty if I held it in the way my body asks for, but the look she gives me diminishes the lust that slowly begins to crawl again within me.

It’s one that bears a different kind of shyness. It’s fear-induced respect and the hatred towards myself thickens.

I don’t want her to feel this way, but I molded it in her.

It’s my fault.

It’s why I think twice before I tell my fingers no, for they ache to drum against the top edge of her chair in effort to linger in her proximity. I won’t encourage her discomfort when I yearn to wipe it clean. But when she inhales my prolonged silence and raises her thin brows in waiting, the tiniest sliver of a smile quivering on her lips, she doesn’t know it—but she somehow gives me the words I was lacking.

“Did Jungkook tell you where to go?” I ask, softly, fearing her knees will turn away from me, her body language divulging to me the depth of her uneasiness around me. But she remains put, the pillows of her lips balancing at last as they stretch out in a small grin that I don’t deserve.

Her slender nose crinkles.

My heart forgets to beat.

“No, he told me to wait here and that Min-ji will take me to a room where I can watch you, guys, perform on the TV,” she says, her grin making it difficult for her to get the words out and she blushes. There must be some other, silent language shared between our bodies because I discover myself smiling, too, even though there’s nothing from her sentence that can possibly be the cause of it.

The energy shifts, devastatingly, and heat clings to my skin, dispersing relief down my nerve endings.

All while buzzing tingles chase it, hastily, grabbing it by the back of its shirt and consuming it.

It’s strange, so terribly strange to be consumed by nervousness when I’ve been used to nothingness and emptiness for so long.

And her eyes seem to grow bigger, despite the irrepressible dynamism of her fear. Is she gaining thrill out of it—to be staring at the face of breaking death like the small kitten she is and knowing it’s her power that influences me?

Those eyes. If my ears weren’t bombarded by Hobi’s sound effects wafting down the hall and into the lounge room, mingling with the rise and fall of Jungkook’s voice as he warms it up, I swear I can hear the song of swallows in them. She’s a manifestation of a summer evening in her fear and nervousness, when those birds go mad in the tender blues and pinks of the sky—and I don’t know why I like it so much. Why I want to seize it in my hand and squeeze it.

And she’s about to be all alone here with it while I go join the rest of my brothers.

It’s something that doesn’t feel right.

The staff member taps me on my back. Time is against me—why doesn’t she control it? I swivel behind me to catch her nodding her chin in the direction of the hall and I sigh, quietly.

“Wait with her until Min-ji comes to get her, so she’s not alone here,” I tell her, then look down at the kitty girl again.

Her raised brows create wrinkles on her forehead and once she sees that I’ve noticed, she relaxes, wetting her lips. Doesn't want me to see the surprise that comes from what she created in me.

How cute.

“Enjoy the show,” I murmur, moving my feet towards the exit. I gaze back at her, catch her lungs shuddering, and the words slip off my tongue before I scramble the courage to stop them. “And happy birthday.”

Her blush reaches her neck and it’s all my vision consists of—even when I’m performing.

Our interaction was too short. Too, too short. And my anger took on a new face.

Hers.

Every word I rapped as I stared into the camera, I felt it dissolving in me and transforming into a yearning so great that my verses gained new meaning. A yearning to see her again, talk to her, pinch that fear in my fingers and fling it away, make space for something in her that had the vigor to surprise me and make me soft again. And in my concentration, I didn’t have the fight in me to put a stop to it. I was doing my duty for the happiness of our Army and while I thought about her, it seemed right. Those two things went along and it spurred a pleasant feeling in me that was warmer than the adrenaline sticking to my inflamed body from all the performing.

It didn’t hit me that she was watching me the whole time until my eyes regarded her unperturbed, flaccid posture in that white plastic chair, wading in my thoughts as I was. Her grin and the flecks of light in her eyes illuminate the room with orange, blazing fire. She’s barefoot, her heels kicked to the side, crooked, elegiac, yet still sensuous. Our show is being rerun on the TV and she’s watching it, transfixed, not realizing me and Jungkook were the first to come to her out of the group.

A mental connection clicks in my brain at the sight of it. The peach blossoms of the honeysuckle, Jungkook and the genuine love I carry for him. It is that orange color—it’s a home that keeps it safe, the atmosphere that she exudes through her evident elation and I don’t really understand why I feel this way.

I haven’t even known her for a day.

And it’s forced to collapse when her pools don’t find mine, but Jungkook’s once we walk in, joining her. She holds up her hand in the air, curling down her middle and ring fingers in while the rest of her digits remain erect, small and slim as they are. Her nose crunches up in the way it did when our bodies spoke in that secret language. And when she laughs and the corners of her eyes crinkle, I realize she’s mimicking his gesture that he so often does on stage while showing off his Army tattoo.

The finger-fucking gesture.

Her blush beams on her face, even more so when she does a stroking movement with her curled fingers, and I can’t help but wonder, briefly, if that’s how she does it to herself when she’s all alone and the night sinks inside her skin to get a refill of her juices, only to smear it across the sky.

It’s what I need to focus on, so I don’t explode in anger that she ignores me.

Jungkook cackles, sticking out his tongue and doing the gesture. I hide my face in my towel, getting rid of the sweat coating me—but it pours out of my pores again when I hear her giggle.

And I need to leave, my imagination no longer strong enough to withstand the jealousy that poisons my blood all over again.

I fling the towel out and away from me, not caring where it lands.

I don’t meet any eyes as I walk out, keeping my sight fixed on the gray floor, streaked with black lines from the hundreds of wheels of carts that have drove down the hall and from all the sneakers that have walked past. I follow them and I don’t know where they take me until I’m suddenly face to face with the gaping night.

And it’s not her.

It’s my wound.

No stars for a naked pupil to see. Merely an abounding canvas of blackness that stares back at me and questions me, questions my feelings when it knows full well how hard I’ve wept, many times, in its airy embrace.

I sit against the wall, needing something solid to support me, the spaciousness of the roof enveloping me, but not tightly enough. There, but never close enough—always a safe distance apart, as if afraid of me.

Everyone is so always fucking afraid of me.

And when they lean in and graze my heart, they get repulsed by me.

It’s an ouroboros that my life, like my legs, follows. Like a dog chasing its own tail—and it’s such a perfect comparison because I’ve always been alone, save for my brothers. Distracted for a while, then alone again.

I’m weary of it, despite the fact my body tends to wait for the thrill of the attention, longs for it, even when I dislike it. I’m an oxymoron that won’t cease and I have to live with it.

And I can’t exit out of it because I have millions of lives that depend on me, plus six more.

I sigh and I think sucking on a cigarette, numbly, while I crawl on my knees through the forest of my thoughts and feelings would be a thing of perfection. But I can’t afford that. Not when we’re working again. Not when our boss lurks at every corner, has eyes everywhere. Jungkook has had his last hotdog for a while and I…

I swathed my broken strings around someone he brought into my life.

Through a little hole my brothers let me see by forcing her to sit through a conversation that was a pain for her. A moonlight stripe of her personality, encased by her social anxiety and shyness. One that has awakened my body to emotions it hasn’t felt the touch of in a long time.

Why am I not fighting it?

Why am I not coercing my soul into submission, into that abyss of emptiness and hostility?

Why am I letting myself feel?

She’s just a girl that he’s seeing. Many stories like these have been written before and we’ve read the lines, recognized words that limned us, only for the love interest to disappear into thin air after some time like she never existed. And she’d just be another character in his love chronicles, if her persona hadn’t spoken to me so much.

If her body hadn’t spoken to me in a language no one knows—not even me.

I can’t begin my sentences about her with ‘she’s just a girl’, because she isn’t.

And I don’t understand how that’s come to be.

It happened so quickly that I fear I wasn’t present enough.

My wound tilts its head as my world does the same thing—slants on its axis. Coos at me, seeing me, seeing through me. Reminds me of what happened the last time I felt.

The passing of my girlfriend gave me the gift of a gun to my hand—gave me the face of death that I’ve been carrying ever since because it nearly made my dream of time ending come true. And the kitty girl… standstill hangs off her fingers like a pearl necklace that’s too long. And I find myself wanting to wear it. Because it’s her decision, her consciousness, her will.

Not mine.

And it will bring me closer to my Sun-mi.

My wound begins to cry at the memory of her, raindrops pitter-pattering on the tin ridges of the rooftop and I cherish that she’s remembered and honored by such vastness, by such picturesqueness that I’ve always considered the night to be. And when the wind brushes along my fidgeting hands, I almost feel her touch all over again.

Feel.

I feel.

And in my heart, I tell her. I sail to her, attaching myself to her again. Tell my Sun-mi that I am capable of feeling and that I don’t know how it came together in me. And I ask her, in utmost respect, to guide me on this unknown path.

Because I am alone without her. Adrift, without rhyme and reason. No wits to me, no rationality, no clear perception of right and wrong.

There’s only grayness to me.

Maybe that’s why I, unknowingly, dyed my hair this color before the start of the tour.

And it dawns on me, now that one chapter has closed in my life, that the passing of my Sun-mi a year and a half ago is the reason why I’ve clung to Jungkook so rigidly. Because I couldn’t spend my time on her, I spent it on Jungkook. Because I had all this love for her and I couldn’t give it to her, so I gave it to Jungkook.

And the kitty girl has put a stop to it.

Sun-mi graces me with the tepid, yet fuzzy impression that it’s good—that it was meant to happen. And I believe her.

And with my belief, the rain thickens.

A thunder rolls forward from a far-away corner of the canvas of the sky that I can’t see. And I dwell in the pool of the fountain of the love I still have for her and forever will continue to have. Kneel in it. Search for her.

I imagine her. The button of her nose, the curl of her top lip whenever we ridiculed aegyo by doing it together and doing a good fucking job while at it. I imagine her small fist at her round cheek, but she connects my memories to the kitty girl.

And she consumes me, wholly.

Sun-mi makes me imagine her doing a cat-like aegyo and as the corner of my mouth lifts, a particular fear devours my gut.

A fear of closeness.

A fear of doing something with her that I did with Sun-mi, even when she okays it in my spirit.

A fear of reliving something so painful again.

The rain inches towards me and I scurry to my feet, my hand trembling as I open the door to the staircase. And when I shut out the sound of hard rainfall and prevent the traumatic memories of my accident from slinking into my mind, it’s the only strength I have left.

And I crumble.

I mirror the rain I abhor so much.

I sit on the top of the staircase and I sear my hands with my acid-suffused tears. Sob so devastatingly that I don’t recognize myself, drenching the denim fabric over my knees. And when I pull on my hair, numbness is all that I detect within me.

Good.

No feelings; only emptiness.

I steel myself by taking a few deep breaths, letting the oxygen settle that deep in me. And I unattach myself from my Sun-mi, promise her I will get back to her soon. Go back to who I previously was before I scraped the skin of my knees raw on the hardened soil of my emotions and thoughts.

Alone death.

But Sun-mi doesn’t sail away back to heaven. Doesn’t let me go. She stomps her foot on the wet grass of my heart and I understand why. I asked her to guide me and what I didn’t know was that she would break the laws of heaven in order to do that. She wouldn’t whisper words of wisdom into the chambers of my heart. She would take my hand and show me wisdom, pointing me to the right decision.

That is my Sun-mi.

I let her because I need her. I bow to her and I would stoop to my stomach on this dirty, metal staircase floor to divulge my respect and gratitude to her if I didn’t hear a voice echoing up towards me.

A familiar male voice calling out to me.

Sun-mi pulls me to it and tingles vibrate down my legs as I fly through the stairs, skipping the bottom ones in order to get me faster to my brother. Sun-mi pumps blood into my heart, refreshing the grass she lays upon, and lightness descends upon my shoulders.

Her work of art.

Heaving, I meet Jungkook in the doorframe, glancing up at me, disappointment lidding his eyes. But I don’t fear, not when Sun-mi is with me. He opens the door wider for me to step through, but I remain fixed on my spot, panting, ringing piercing through my hearing sense.

Too much adrenaline at once in a season of drought. My body is unable to catch up to the new acclimatization.

“What’s going on?” I ask, my throat raw from my crying and I clear it, so there’s no evidence of my sensitivity. Sun-mi caresses the wall of my heart to soothe me and tears burn at the back of my eyes—from the simple fact that I can feel her.

I’ve felt her only once before. A week after she died, I prayed to her, loudly, until I lost my voice. Begged her to come back to me.

And she did.

And it felt nice until it didn’t—so I made it my habit to attach and unattach myself because of my fragility. It is only a matter of time before the logic of your mind distinguishes a real person from a ghost. And the parting of that vulnerable mist, in the middle of your agony, isn’t for the faint-hearted.

But Sun-mi, at this very moment, feels more real than she ever has. As if she truly was hidden in the rooms of my heart like a little doll, like a little angel that has the task from above to guide me.

And because I need it, I’ll let more time pass through this transcendental connection.

Jungkook flattens his lips, tightly, the tip of his tongue poking out to play with the thin metal pierced through his bottom lip. He’s changed back into the clothes he came in, minus the fluffy jacket. A black T-shirt, black pants and sneakers. It makes the green of his hair stand out—just like the wisp of the same color on that singular strand of the girl kitty’s hair.

They have a tendency to match and shame boils in me, that Sun-mi is a witness to the jealousy I feel. I haven’t told her and I don’t know if I want to. In my momentary cowardice, I hope that she can sense it and validate it.

But I gain nothing from her.

Silence.

One that Jungkook breaks.

“Staff said that we have to wait until the storm passes.”

My stomach sinks, the memory of the rainfall faint in my ears. “Good.”

Jungkook pauses before he voices out the question that I can visibly see rising in him. Nibbles his bottom lip, the metal tilting to the side like my world. “Where did you go?”

My breath shivers as I inhale, tasting my half-false words before I speak them. “I felt hot and I needed some fresh air.”

I felt jealous that you made dirty innuendos with your friend, I don’t say. It led me to seek my dead girlfriend because I feel inclined to fraternize with that aforementioned friend.

Jungkook frowns. “You went out in the rain?”

I pass through the gap between his body and the doorframe, not able to stand the position I’ve been put in, anxiety prickling my fingertips. Jungkook lets the door shut behind him with a loud thud, following closely behind me until he falls in step beside me.

“It felt refreshing until it didn’t,” I decide to mutter. Typical words of mine—I can’t stand them either.

Sun-mi is still silent.

Maybe I should unattach myself, protect myself from further pain. It was a moment of weakness, anyways—

Jungkook rubs my shoulder, gently, the fixed one, barely touching me, but the gesture is there. And I grasp why I love him so much.

His gentleness is everything to me.

“The rain will stop,” he says and I take those words to heart, giving them the meaning that they are the wisdom I needed to hear, the wisdom I sought from my quiet Sun-mi.

The rain will stop.

The sensitivity will stop, too.

And time will stop soon, one day.

𓂃 ౨ৎ LOVE-KISSED BABIES: @tkslovechild, @jjk7k, @parkinglot-nights, @bethvar, @Sexytholland, @yoongibaybee, @crystaleah,@fennecnco, @lil-kpopstan, @euphoricmyth, @jungkoock, @cinmmongirl, @hobiberrystuff.

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trivia-yandere · 1 year ago

Note

Hello! I love the stories you guys write! Thank you for taking the time to write. I’m not sure if you’re still taking requests, but I was wondering if you could write king jungkook/jimin tying princess reader up to the bed and having his way with her and it’s her first time. She has to marry him now. Thank you again!

so i followed most of what you sent, with a little twist :) i hope what we came up with is enjoyable

word is bond

in order to save your kingdom from perishing, you agree to give your body to the demon king - jimin. @chimmy-licious @bangtans-momma @sweetempathprunetree @momnomnom @darkuni63

word count: 5.142

warning: unsolicited touching/groping/biting/grinding, blood, voyeurism, public humiliation/degradation, oral (f receiving), throat fucking, yandere tendencies, finger sucking, dark themes, sadism, compulsion, riding, creampie, violence, multiple character deaths, manipulation, mind break,

halloween masterlist | alternate universe masterlist

The castle walls are tall, towering hundreds of feet above you. The throne room is bright - pentagon shaped windows shining the early morning sun into the throne room. You saunter down the marble floor, the heels of your boots clicking against it. Your royal attire is made to attract attention - and to separate you from the townspeople, of course. The royal jacket is larger than you’d like, but plated in gold, fur lined around the collar of it. Your skirt drags along the floor as does the cape you wore.

You can feel the eyes of the townspeople, behind a mountain of guards, on you. You keep your eyes straight ahead on the throne, the large elevated seat that you once dreamed of sitting upon.

You made your way to the throne chair, a guard assisting you upon the elevated surface. You look back at the large crowd, so many people in such a closed off room - all of which are here for you. Your heart feels heavy with joy knowing that your people were here to witness you be crowned as Queen.

Your eyes caught with your brother - the former King. He’s seated at the far right of the large throne room, an emotionless look in his eyes. He doesn’t smile your way when your eyes meet, but you aren’t surprised. You cannot recall the last time your brother smiled at you, maybe back before he was crowned as King once the death of your parents; and that was many years ago.

The crowd begins to clap and cheer once they witness Haneul, an old soldier who once fought alongside your father and now stood as a mentor, lift the crown high above your head. The crown is gold, several circle ornaments displayed upon it with several different gemstones and diamonds upon it. A smile forms onto your lips when you feel the crown be placed upon your head.

“All hail the Queen!” Haneul says, voice boisterous and loud so all of the crowd could hear.

You bow your head slightly to the crowd, eyes roaming to all faces of the people - your people.

Once again, your eyes meet those of your brother. You aren’t upset that he doesn’t appear cheerful - after all, the throne was overthrown and now you took his spot as ruler. However, there's a tint in his eyes that you cannot understand.

Your elder brother had been King for years now, nearing a decade since the death of your father a year after your mother. He wasn’t married, and still hasn't found a wife to call Queen. He was always a busy man, becoming a soldier once he was of age, working his way up to lieutenant, sergeant and so on.

The death of your father came sudden, and your brother was crowned King a week after. You saw the once youthful look turn to one full of stress and disdain. His expression turned emotionless overtime, appearing completely far gone.

Your brother was once loved as a Prince, but became hated as a King. He became tyrannical once he was in power, no longer valuing the townspeople's needs or wants. He was now responsible for the suffering of the same people, forcing working hours to increase, along with tax becoming nearly unreasonable. Anyone who rebelled against your brother was arrested, sended to an underground confinement - and likely to die.

What caused the rebellion against your brother had you at the forefront of it all. You had begged your brother to stop his madness, that it wasn’t like him to be such a cruel individual. You had stormed past guards and elite soldiers to get to your brother, in his hands a gun pointed straight at a man. Guards are attempting to hold back a forming mod, all protesting the life of the man who your brother held a gun at.

You’d never forget that day your brother had made you decide the fate of the man. Princes or Princesses never had the authority over a King or Queen’s decision. “I allow you to live a good life in the palace, sister.” your brother stated. “But since you are too stubborn to mind the business of a Princess, then I’ll allow you to make a decision of a Queen just this once.”

The life of the angry mod - nearly 100 - or the life of the man was in your power to decide. You had refused, shaking your head at the thought of it. The man didn’t deserve to die, he was just one of the first to go against your brother's harsh ruling, the mob following soon after in protest.

“You’d be a weak Queen, sister.” was your brother's final words to you after he killed the man and detained the angry mod in confinement.

“Sister.”

It was now evening, the townspeople all guided out of the palace. It’s eerily silent inside the castle, even the guards don’t appear to speak much.

You sit inside of your study - the same that once belonged to your father and brother while they ruled. Your arms are crossed as you look upon your brother. He leans against a large bookshelf, dark eyes on you.

“Brother.”

Haneul observed the pair of you with a sigh. He was such a close friend to your father, he was there when the two of you were born nearly a decade apart. He was seen as a mentor when you both needed him to be, or a friend if it was that. Witnessing your brother become a complete tyrant wasn’t something anyone expected, but neither was the fall of love the two shared as siblings.

“Congratulations on becoming Queen.” your brother steps away from the bookshelf, hands behind his back. “You’ve surprised me by holding a sword in front of you so threateningly.”

Your brother’s teasing. He had scoffed when you had come, stating that he had no business being the King if he couldn’t run it without causing such fear upon the people.

“I have given you the title as Queen willingly. To think my own flesh and blood would betray me in such a way.” your brother hisses with a shake of his head, dark hair flowing around him.

“You became a tyrant!” you hiss, slamming your hands onto the table. “You were never a leader or a King, brother. You became someone that not even I knew.”

“I’ve done whatever to assure your safety most importantly, sister.” your brother stalks towards you, a malice look in his eye. “I’ve done everything with good reason.”

“Good reason?” you scoff. “Murdering our own people is a good reason, brother? Forcing them to work such cruel hours and raising the prices of taxes and rent is a good reason?”

You shake your head. You had no need to listen further to your brother's ramblings.

Haneul steps between the pair of you with raised hands. “Let’s attempt to remain calm.” he says with a warning tone.

“No.” your brother hisses. “Since my dear sister believes that I am nothing but a tyrant, how about I tell you the truth.”

You knit your brows at your brother.

“There’s a reason we do not get out of our Kingdom's walls and why they are so high, sister. You’ve been told countless folklore of the mountains that surround us and just how we are to not step foot from the gates - especially at night?”

You swallow the lump in your throat and nod your head slightly. There was never a need to question the elder people in your lives who told you how dangerous outside the walls were. The townspeople remained inside, living comfortably in their own homes. Schools, sanctuaries and factories remained inside the Kingdom grounds, surrounding the castle you resided in. There was enough food to be had between the townspeople and the royals - farmers growing the best vegetables and raising livestock and all.

“There’s a reason for this, sister.” your brother continues. “I had good reason to become the way I am. Haneul, you were one of several survivors that fought the darkness that are outside our Kingdom walls decades ago while our grandfather reigned. You understand the threat we face day by day.”

Haneul nods slowly, eyes glancing at you.

“What darkness?” you question, leaning closer to your desk.

“Women are not allowed in the army, sister, and thus you have no true reason to understand just what we are raised to fight outside the Kingdom walls. We have been able to slain such darkness for decades until a new threat came upon.”

You feel the hairs on the back of your neck rise at your brother's words.

“I’ve come face to face to a new threat, a King such as myself, of this darkness.”

Haneul is the first to react, his eyes widening at your brother's words. “Impossible.”

“I tell no lies, Haneul.” your brother shrugs. “It seems as though us slaying the lower demons were just a distraction for the King to rise into power once more.”

Demon?

“W-What-”

“Your grandfather has slain the King back in his reign. I’ve watched-”

Haneul is interrupted by your brother once more. He waves the older man off with a huff. “He was never slain, Haneul. He killed all of my men that came with me years ago and left me as the sole survivor.”

You gasp at the words.

You recall the time your brother was brought in several wounded after returning, but you were not given a direct answer to what had happened. The sight of the blood stained floors had haunted you for weeks on end.

“What exactly are you saying, brother? What darkness is threatening us?” you try your best to not appear frightened, but it’s impossible.

Your brother - after all these years - wore an expression. That of sadness…fear.It’s as though you can finally let his guard down and tell you what he was feeling; allow everything in his mind to fall right into your lap.

“The demon King was never dead, Haneul. He was unable to seek his revenge for he was wounded, which is why he had his own army to do so. But in the last few years, he’s grown stronger by the day. He warned me that we would be coming to take over our Kingdom and get revenge on the very people he managed to defeat him temporarily.”

Your brother's eyes never leave yours.

“You and I, sister, are who he wants dead. He left me alive just to spread the word - that or this is all a game to him.” your brother’s voice cracks - one that was once so deep and stern, now has a whimper to it. He can finally break the wall he has put up, but at what cause?

“I did what I had to do to raise an army to fight this darkness, sister. Haneul. I needed the townspeople working constantly on our weapons, armory and anything else we needed to fight them off. We needed the money to bring in outside sources from down the mountains if need be.”

“Brother…” Why didn’t he tell you?

“All the sacrifices I made, sister, was to not only protect the Kingdom, but to protect you.” your brother turns away from you. He was your elder brother and right before your father’s death, he had promised that you would always be out of harm's way. “You told me that you’d never forgive me for the tyrant I’ve become, sister. And that was the risk I was willing to take if it meant you’d remained alive.”

“What is a Queen willing to do in order to protect her Kingdom?” is what the demon had asked you.

“Anything.” is what you told him.

Your brother had told you that soon - maybe within the next five months - that darkness would take over your Kingdom and that was the reason he became completely tyrannical. You now understood why he became so harsh, why he needed such a large amount of money to supply weapons and armor; even if you didn’t completely agree with his reasoning.

You were now Queen and the Kingdom and the townspeople needed you to be there for them. Against Haneul and your brothers wishes, you made your way out of the large Kingdom’s walls, assuring to close the gate behind you. You never been outside the Kingdom, walking down the dark path towards the forested area - you never had a reason to, either. The moon is high and shining bright and you’re thankful that it gives you enough light to see where you were going.

Though you were never raised to fight in the imperial army, you were trained in combat and how to protect yourself if need be - you just hoped that what you were taught was enough if you came across whatever darkness was out there.

You’re unsure how long you’ve walked the dirt path and yet, you’ve found nothing. Your plan was something you weren’t sure of yourself - find the darkness and what? Fight them off yourself?

Your head snaps to the left, instantly, you grab your dagger to defend yourself. Before you can do anything to defend yourself from any attacker, you feel your feet being lifted from the ground and the side of your body throbbing in pain.

You’re at a loss of breath, chest heaving while your heart is beating erratically. Your back is pressed firmly against a tree, your hand clenches along your ribcage.

“I’ve never seen a woman out this late.”

The voice is sinister and you do not see who it belongs to at first. Your vision is blurred and you’re doing everything in your power to focus on your surroundings.

Footsteps, you hear them coming. Your eyes slowly become wider when they capture the thing in front of you - was this the demon your brother spoke of? Part of the darkness that was going to take over the Kingdom?

The demon is tall, you note. Its eyes are dark and appear to have no irises. It’s covered in hair and its spine is curved. You recall the tales you heard when you were younger from your brother of werewolves, but this cannot be that - right?

You raise your dagger, the light from the moon flashing the demon right into the eye. You gulp just as the demon lunges.

You scream upon feeling something slash along your cheek, but you were determined to win this fight. Your dagger comes down onto the demon's shoulder as it gets closer to you, and your feet kicks it away from you, but to no avail. You feel your royal attire being ripped, your jacket going first.

To think you survived this long without truly knowing the truth of the darkness that plagues the forest and mountains outside your kingdom - lived long enough to become Queen.

To now possibly die before finding a way to fight for your Kingdom long enough.

Your clothing is ruined, near shreds when you hear a high pitched scream come from the demon before you. It begins to burn before your eyes. Your hand immediately touches your cheek, the warm blood oozes onto your fingers.

“You…”

You cannot see anything surrounding you - or whoever the voice belongs to. There's a breeze in the air now and it causes you to shiver due to your shattered clothing.

There’s a force pulling you by your hair. Your hands reach out to try to get whatever it was off of you, but you’re shocked to feel your clothes being ripped, as well. You struggle against the unseen force, your thighs being pulled apart.

“I’ve yet to see a woman out of the Kingdom.” The voice speaks once more. “Until now. And not just any woman…” you’re shocked to feel a wet sensation upon your cheek. “...the Queen.”

Your clothes - though shattered - are completely off of your body. You’re left in nothing but undergarments and chest binding, and soon the bandage bindings are off of you, as well. You feel disgusted with the unseen’s force hands upon your skin, touching and groping.

You feel a pair of lips kiss down your bare skin, the wind blowing erratically around you. The unseen force places kisses upon your neck, down to your collarbone, breast to your stomach. There’s goosebumps littering your skin, the foreign sensation disgusting you - more so because you feel a pool of pleasure between your legs.

“What is a Queen doing outside her kingdom?” the force asks.

“The King…” you trail off, just as you feel hands tug at your undergarments, the cotton clothed that is the only piece of dignity you had left. “I-I need to see him…”

You force stops and for a moment, you begin to think that you’ve hallucinated. You go to cover your breast, chest heaving as you breathe.

You close your eyes for a moment to capture your breath, and once you open them you’re startled.

“You’ve come out of your Kingdom to see me, Queen?” the man's voice is the same as the unseen force - low and sultry, a hint of taunt in his voice.

The man appears human, tan and smooth skin with dark hair with matching dark eyes. His lips are plush, pink and full.

You feel as though you’re hallucinating once more. The man is right where the unseen force had been, now instead he’s pinning you down. You feel far too exposed for his eyes and unsolicited hands wandering.

“Usually I kill whoever comes so deep into the mountains…” the man's nails are long as he trails them down your cheek. You feel the cut on your cheek begin to burn and you winch slightly. The cut disappears in a matter of seconds and you no longer feel the throbbing pain from your side. “...but you look far too appealing to get rid of, Queen.”

You swallow the lump in your throat.

“Why have you ventured out to see me, Queen?” the man doesn’t stop his touches, nor does he care about asking for any form of permission. His hands grip both of your naked breasts, tongue dipping down to capture a nipple into his mouth.

“Please, stop.” you beg, shuddering beneath him at the foreign sensation. “I-I…you’re going to attack my kingdom.”

Your back arches when the demon continues to suckle onto your breast, eyes flickering up to you. “I am.” he says after popping your nipple from his mouth. “Such a whorish body for a virgin, Queen.”

The demon shoves your thighs apart, his eyes on your clothed center. He notices the wet spot on your underwear and hums.

You feel hot with embarrassment, thighs quivering to close.

“I sense that you’ve come out here to make a deal with me, Queen? You’re far too weak to kill me.” the demon laughs, as if the thought of you attempting to cause him any harm is just that comical.

The demon rips off your underwear and dips his head between your legs. His tongue laps between your folds.

Once again, your back arches and your eyes clenched shut. You want to fight the demon, but there’s no use - he’s stronger than you, even if he appears human. He holds onto your legs tightly as he ravishes your clit hungrily.

Your moans don’t go unnoticed from either of you. You didn’t want this - he was a demon and presumably the King your brother spoke of. However, you cannot control how your body feels - and it feels far too amazing to not moan.

“What is a Queen willing to do in order to protect her Kingdom?” is what the demon had asked you, lifting his head from your throbbing clit, licking his lips.

“Anything.” is what you told him, fresh tears pooling down your cheeks with overstimulation.

“Sister…” the look on your brother's face breaks your heart. “...what have you done?”

The demon’s name is Jimin - or that’s what he called himself when he allowed you to leave, making sure your skin was littered with bite marks and bruises before he did so.

The last time you saw Jimin was months prior when you had strolled through the forest. He had allowed you to leave and told you in five months time, you would see him again.

Jimin didn’t say that when he’d return, it would be without bloodshed. He allowed the darkness - as your brother called them - to wreak havoc upon the Kingdom. Innocent lives were lost and nearly half of your soldiers had gone with them.

Your brother’s eyes fall upon you, running towards the same demon King he had warned Haneul about months prior, a look of disbelief on his face. He holds the sword high in one hand, ready to attack Jimin if given the chance to - only you had stepped right in between the blade and the demon. The demon held a smug look upon his face, a smirk forming on his plush lips.

You were crying, your brother notes. Your hand grasps Jimin’s top, pushing him away with all your might - something he allowed you to do. You had fallen to your knees next, begging for the King to call off the darkness surrounding you - to stop the havoc upon innocent blood.

“I told you I’d do anything.” you cried to the smug King.

“That you did.” Jimin quips.

The demon king raises his hands, flicking it slightly. It was as if it was a call to attention - the once demonic entities that savagely attacked the townspeople and guards - now surrounded you.

“Sister…” your brother murmurs, eyes gazing along the different types of entities surrounding you all.

“A Queen is willing to do anything to protect her Kingdom.” Jimin states to your brother.

Jimin snaps his fingers, and in a blink of an eye, the scenery changes. You are now inside the palace in the large throne room. Your brother, several guards and soldiers including the demonic entities occupy the room.

You swallow the lump in your throat, eyes roaming to the frozen crowd.

“They’re conscious. Just unable to move.” Jimin states from behind you, a hand gripping your shoulder. “I want them to watch their Queen crumble beneath my fingers. Especially that brother of yours.”

Jimin snaps again and now, you feel it once more - the unseen force. Your royal attire is being ripped from your body once more - falling to shreds at your feet. Jimin watches intently at the show before him, you flushed and hot and embarrassed.

Jimin raises a hand and points two fingers at you. He flicks it low and instantly, you fall to your knees.

Jimin is slow to walk towards you, and when he does, he grips your cheeks harshly. He pries your mouth open and enters two fingers inside of it.

“Don’t choke.” Jimin commands, forcing his fingers deeper inside of your mouth.

You do, feeling the tips of his fingers reach closer to the back of your throat.

Jimin sighs with a shake of his head.

You gasp when your cheek stings. You fall to the side, barely managing to catch yourself.

“Open your mouth for me, human.” Jimin commands, but it’s as though he does it himself. Your mouth opens wide as if on impact - having no true control of your actions.

Your eyes are wide as you watch Jimin release his trousers. It falls to his knees and before you is his cock - erect, veiny and large.

“I can smell your fear, Queen. You being afraid will not stop me from taking you in front of your soldiers, guards and brother.”

Jimin places the tip of his cock on your tongue, rubbing it along the wet muscle for a moment before he fully enters your mouth.

Jimin is a true demon - your human tears do not affect him. With each thrust, he hits the back of your throat, but your mouth never falters - you’re compelled to keep your mouth open until he is finished.

Jimin grunts, surprise how your throat takes him so well - he can see the outline of his cock on your throat as he fucks you, and it only makes him want to hurt you more.

Your throat swells with a thick, salty substance and you find it difficult to breathe. You’re squirming beneath Jimin, wanting everything in your power to fight his compulsion and to get away from him.

“Swallow.” Jimin hisses - and you do. It’s difficult at first, so thick that it takes several tries. But when you do, you begin to cough at the new found oxygen you receive when Jimin takes his cock from your mouth.

Jimin cackles at your appearance - puffy lips and face, blurry eyes with tear stained cheeks.

“Go ahead, Queen,” Jimin tilts his head. “tell me how you are going to save your kingdom.”

As if it wasn’t humiliating enough to have the eyes of people who respected you watching, Jimin wanted you to further be embarrassed.

“B-By letting you use me.” your throat hurts, throbbing with such pain.

“Hm…” Jimin shakes his head. “I want to hear you beg, Queen. You came to me, afterall.”

You’re shuddering, naked skin erupting in goosebumps. You bowed to Jimin, wishing that this was nothing but a cruel nightmare you’d wake up from. “Please u-use me…”

Jimin snorts, unamused. “If that’s what you call begging, then I’ll kill them now.”

One guard is unfrozen. He falls to his knees, engulfed in bright orange flames. His screams echo off the wall of the throne room, echoing deep within your mind.

“Please use me and don’t hurt my people!” you scream, hot and fresh tears soring down your cheeks. You’re trembling in fear, Jimin’s true nature showing. “Hurt me as much as you’d like!”

Jimin’s interest peaks, a smirk forming onto his lips. “Oh?”

The unseen force slams your face against the marble floor and forces your legs apart. You feel Jimin behind you, sharp nails against your naked skin. His skin burns yours, so hot that it feels as if it’ll melt yours.

“A Queen would do anything to save her kingdom.” Jimin cackles once more.

You scream out when you feel yourself being stretched out. Your eyes clenched shut, tears finding their way out of your eyes somehow.

Jimin grinds deep inside of you, hissing at just how tight you were - a true virgin. Instantly, you’re bleeding, blood seeping down your thighs mixed with slick. But Jimin doesn’t care. He doesn’t slow his abusive thrusts.

“For years I’ve been bound into the forest until I was able to break free.” Jimin says, his abdomen slapping against your ass as he takes you. “Years my kind has been falling to the likes of filthy humans such as yourself.”

You’re going to die, the pain excruciating. With each thrust, you’re pounded against the marble floor roughly, hitting deeper and deeper inside of you that you’re positive you’d be split open.

“And now, Queen, I will take out decades of frustration upon you with no remorse.”

Jimin’s promise rang true. He continues to pound into you at a brutal pace for who knows how long. You felt yourself being filled countless times - each time more than before.

Jimin had flipped you onto your back, admiring how your breast bounced furiously as he fucks you, his cock causing a bulge so large in your stomach. Your cries are nothing but music to his ears, pussy clenching him so tightly as it drips a large puddle around him.

Jimin hoists you up, fucking into you against one of the frozen guards, not caring about any of them or their lives - humiliating you was his true purpose. You’re unable to speak, only screaming and crying louder with each thrust.

Hours upon hours had gone by and you had no tears left to cry or any protest to give. You accepted your fate by now. Your insides hurt and you’re truly unsure just how many times you could be pleasured by such a demon - an insane amount of liquid had squirted out of you countless times.

“It’s your turn, Queen.” Jimin drops you onto the ground, amused by your twitching form. His cum oozes out of you rapidly, clit throbbing and red.

Your body suddenly feels hot and any exhaustion you once felt is now gone. This had to be the work of Jimin’s demonic powers.

You spring from your fetal position to wrap your legs around Jimin. He sits upon the cold marble floor, wrapping his arms around you.

What was going on? Why had you suddenly regained such strength and stamina?

You sit upon Jimin’s erect cock and moan out. Your hips rise and fall at an alarming pace - you’ve never done this before, however, you appear a pro at it. Your fingernails dig into his skin and you feel your eyes roll to the back of your head.

Jimin chuckles at your new eagerness, allowing you to go wild against him. It may be his compulsion over you, but he cannot fake your orgasm or your slick - that was all you.

“You seem to be enjoying yourself, Queen. Does my cock do this to you?”

You nod your head erratically, your hips never buckling. You’re creaming his cock, stars forming in your compelled eyes. All you could think about his Jimin - his cock, his cum, and him overall.

“You’ll only cum when I allow you to, Queen. Is that what you want? To cum?”

“Please, please, please!” your mind is blank - you’ve forgotten what you initially agreed upon with the demon, all you can think about now is cumming all over his cock. “Please let me cum!”

“Cock hungry whore.” Jimin wraps a hand around your neck and squeezes. “These people would never respect you as their Queen even after you risked your life to save theirs.”

You’re cumming, a pool of slick shooting out of you, but even then you cannot stop your aggressive riding. You wanted more than to cum - you wanted Jimin’s cum deep inside of you once more - over and over again.

“What are you willing to do to have my cum, whore?” Jimin begins to thrust along with you, reaching deeper. “Would you watch your Kingdom burn for it?”

You’re too far gone now and you nod your head.

Humans were truly easy to fool.

“So be it.” Jimin snaps his fingers, the room erupting in a fit of fire.

Even with the sounds of screams, you want nothing more than for Jimin to use you - to breed you. It’s what whores truly desire, Jimin thinks, to be bred by whoever is willing. He’s positive once you come back to your senses, you’d be devastated to know that your brother, Haneul, the royal guards and soldiers are dead - however, he promised you that your Kingdom would remain; not the people occupying it.

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justbelievinginmagic · 1 month ago

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the dragon-blood chronicles ⎯ part 1: the spark.

pairing: namjoon x reader series summary: There are tales about dragon-blood men ruling over the kingdom of Bangtan for centuries; old myths that Crown-Prince Seokjin and second-born Prince Namjoon heard while growing up. Stories about bullet-proof, fire-breathing serpetine creatures with the ability to shift into human form and dominate the land with an iron fist. It was a fable of power, but just that - a fable. Dragon-blood folk have been gone for centuries. But when Prince Namjoon get sent away from the Palace at a young age for unruly behavior, things being to change in the kingdom as a war beings to brew, causing eight magical fates to intertwine. glimpse: Namjoon was the second born. The useless prince. The back-up. Forgotten and locked in a tower of a far-off castle, he brewed in his uncontrollable frustration at his fate... until a spark ignites that changes the path of the kingdom. warnings/tags: This is a repost of an older oneshot inspired by the song, we are bulletproof pt. 2 i wrote! i've updated it a bit to loop into the larger story and just to follow the way i write now! ive added about 2.5k new content so if you liked the og give this one a look! PG-13, Romance, Fantasy/Royalty AU, bad family dynamics, possessive & protective Namjoon, dragons, unspoken love, illness. word count: 7.1 k -> next chapter series masterlist

Heavy was the crown on the head of a king.

Namjoon wouldn’t know about that though – even if he wanted to know what the hefty load of a kingdom on his shoulders felt like, he would never have it. He was, after all, the second born. A spare prince. A back-up king. Second to the throne, third in life of the royal family.

The king, naturally, was first. First to enter a room, first to eat their meals (after a servant tested it for poison, of course.) But after him, it was Seokjin.

From birth, Seokjin was first for everything. First to be taught, first to eat, first to be tended to, first to be trained at swordsmanship. Namjoon was quick to learn that as he hobbled around the halls of the palace as a youngster. He was ignored among the royal family – seemingly weaker, smaller than his older brother when born. He made the queen quite sick during her pregnancy. When born, Namjoon was prone to illness as a child. An annoyance, a drain on the kingdom’s resources.

He still tried to follow after his older brother. Seokjin, eldest by three years, tried when he could to be a good bother. He loved the idea of a younger brother, wanting to be the best of friends. He wanted to play Knights and Fiends with him; he wanted to teach him how to read and write; he wanted them to go on fishing trips like he read about in his fairytale books. The older brother played with his little brother only to have the sounds of his nanny calling to him distract him.

“Come along, Prince Seokjin. You have your classes. Leave him alone.”

He hated it, but complied with a frown towards Namjoon and a sad wave.

Namjoon, at the mere age of seven, couldn’t help but begin to try to gain attention. He wanted attention. He wanted to have all the attention that his brother had. He began to do what a child does when upset. Tantruming. Pleading for attention through misaction or disobedience. He’d throw his food to the ground at dinners, arms crossing over his little chest. He’d interrupt classes with cries of ‘this isn’t fair’. He’d fight as his nanny dragged him away from Seokjin, screaming. It grew to such a state – even with Seokjin’s quiet scold of pleadings - “Namjoonie, you’re going to get into trouble; please stop” – that the royal family acted.

That was when he learned he wasn’t loved.

Not like Seokjin. Never like Seokjin.

Namjoon was cast aside. Thrown into a tower at another castle. He was stole in the night – taken in a carriage and awoke in this new place. Alone.

His family didn’t love him. No, they didn’t. The little boy cried and cried.

Namjoon was utterly alone now; all in the name that he couldn’t “distract the crown prince from his duties.” He was cared for enough to know that he was still a prince. Given the finest of things – silver, gold, and silken treasures to keep him content. A collection of maids and servants were there to feed and care for him and a table of knights were there to protect him. He was carefully watched over from a distance. Sadness ate a child and few cared. Few knew what to do when the little boy slammed his door and hid in the tower. The prince fell into a lonely state.

The knights protecting him looked at him as a stranger – an isolated boy, a spare – even if he strived to learn to study weaponry. He tried to join them on their practice range once; he was turned away.

“Your Highness!” there was a cry from a nanny. “You have no need to learn such a skill.”

No, he didn’t he sulked. He didn’t need to learn anything apparently. After all, the second prince had no need to learn of knightly duties, nor fighting, nor war, nor kingly duties. His brother had learned though; at the old castle, Seokjin beamed and preened about his lessons with swordmastery. But Namjoon didn’t need to know it. Because, in the end, Namjoon wasn’t the prince headed to the crown.

The Second.

He was the second.

What did that even mean? If he wasn’t a King, if he wasn’t a Knight, if he wasn’t seen as a worthy Prince either… what was he?

Namjoon learned – like most things in his life – he would have to adapt. He would watch things from afar, learning from high up in his windowed tower. Mimicking the motions the knights made, the strikes of the blade against his bedpost (instead of a training dummy) left deep grooves into the fine wood.

The servants gossiped about his anger issues and how he destroyed things. A monster of a prince.

Namjoon’s focus grew on things he could do without the roadblocks put up by the servants and the royal family. He couldn’t study metalsmith with the knights. But he could study wordsmiths.

Besides his tall tower room, he was granted access to the library. He threw himself into his studies – he learned charts for sailing, war strategy, language, public speaking, trade, and folklore. He’d learn to be king – even if he wouldn’t be one.

When a nanny asked what he was reading, he’d learn to lie a white lie. Just a fantasy book.

After all, wasn’t all of this a fantasy? What was a Prince to do when he wasn’t a Prince?

At first, he envied his brother. He used to think he hated him. Hated him for everything Namjoon couldn’t be. Namjoon fueled himself on that hate in the early years of his isolation – studying with spite on his tongue. Writing curses towards his brother in the sidelines of books. He knew his brother had all the highest advisors and scholars telling him this… and he knew Seokjin didn’t listen. Seokjin wasn’t a good student, in a traditional sense. He liked stories, and most of the history and war tactics the youngest Prince read about was not a good story.

Until he received a letter from his brother.

I don’t know where to turn. I’ve missed you, brother. I feel so lost. I don’t think I’m meant for this. I don’t think I’m meant to be King.

The words were scratched out over and over, as if even writing what was beneath was forbidden.

Father expects so much – expects me to talk with a booming voice. He wants me to be like our ancestors.

Namjoon knew what Seokjin was referring to – even if it had been years since he’d been by his older brother’s side or heard the tales of their family line. Everyone knew the stories of the dragon bloods. How they were creatures that could shapeshift into reptilian beasts that flew. Powerful myths. How they took the throne with ease and led with wisdom beyond this realm. How their royal bloodline supposedly came from them.

It was a story, a folklore. But it was still used to rally the people. The kingdom was strong, strong like a dragon.

Seokjin wrote to Namjoon for advice. And though he thought he despised the crown prince, he replied. At first because Namjoon’s nanny urged him to – “it’d be rude to not reply to the future King, my prince” – but soon he wrote to ease his brother’s worries. He was an aid in running the kingdom even at his young age.

He liked that.

He’d write advice for his brother, sending flocks of pigeons with letters. Books were his escape. And soon, so were you.

He was sixteen when he found you when he was looking for a novel in the library. It was early in the morning; the dew had barely settled on the grasslands. Namjoon stumbled down the stone steps into the grand library, sleepy eyed and still in his fine-tailored pajamas. It took him far too long to notice you. It was only when you let out the smallest giggle. His head snapped to the sound, and he saw you for the first time. A servant’s daughter dressed in worn dark browns and creams; an apron sat dirtied around your waist; it was clear you weren’t where you were supposed to be. Engrossed in a book, your eyes taking in gulps of words even if you stumbled over the larger ones – a finger resting over the word that seemed too complicated to pronounce let alone understand.

And instead of anger, instead of a tantrum, perhaps due to his isolation, he felt… kinship.

You liked to read like he did. You were like him. Alone in the place. He hadn’t seen someone his age before this, he was so used to the older figures rushing around. But you… you were like him. Even if you were dressed poorly.

“Excuse me?” His voice was now a rumbling deep thing with the brink of teenagerhood, deeper even more when dusted with the throes of sleep.

It startled you, slamming the book shut with a puff of dust from the old thing. Your gaze settled on the fine clothes – finer than you had ever seen – and a fear clung to your bones.

The worst-case scenarios tumbled through your head. You would be sent away. You’d be beheaded. Your family would suffer. Your eyes would be plucked out. He was an angry boy – you had heard the rumors and here you were trespassing. In the royal library. His royal library.

“My prince,” you stumbled to your feet, bowing your head. “I’m sorry – please forgive me.”

No, no, no he didn’t want this. He didn’t want fear or babbling or… to lose a possible friend. He had never seen someone in the library. It was his private library, too grand for a single soul to occupy. It wouldn’t hurt… to share. It felt like nails down a chalkboard, like someone was taking his to from him. Why was that so hard to concede to that? Sharing.

Still, he bit down on his tongue.

“No, please. It’s okay,” he tried to soothe.

His hands outstretched to touch your shoulder as if to urge you out of your bow. You shuddered under his touch as if he’d strike you. “It’s okay. Really.”

His voice, deep and warm, lacked the fire of anger. It was more like a hearth, bumbling with embers.

“What… what are you reading?”

“What… what am I reading?” you repeated, incredulous. Baffled.

He offered a small smile, cheeks red as he nodded slowly. He was so unused to this. So used to the nannies who were frightened of him or the tired old maids who didn’t want to put in the effort to care for him truly.

He tried to make himself look smaller, that’d help right? You were so much smaller than him already he noticed. He nodded again.

“It’s… it’s a fairytale, you probably wouldn’t like it,” she insisted.

“I like reading,” he said simply. “Tell me about it? Please.”

You licked your lips, eying him up and down before nodding softly. It wasn’t a beheading. It wasn’t a violent tantrum. In fact, he looked kind of sweet, bashful, as his sleepy face broke into a grin and he settled down next to the spot you were previously sitting.

Day by day, you’d meet in the early morning light of the majestic library. In that time, he’d hear what you were reading; even insisting on you reading the words aloud. He’d correct you where he could. Never did his corrections make you feel ashamed or stupid. He was surprisingly gentle with his words you noticed.

Your mornings – when you were meant to be preparing his breakfast - were spent reading beside the young prince. Eventually, when you got scolded so much, it made you cry and you were trembling in your shoes to miss a shift – he changed your schedule. While in the early morn you’d share your books, by mid-morning, he shared with you the books he loved – philosophy, folklore, science - while you rushed to make his breakfast in the grand kitchen. He’d lean against the cutting counter and stare as you whisked eggs and kneaded dough.

It was sometimes difficult to be around him. The Prince was a handsome man. His hair was long for his age, curling up at the nape of his neck. You wondered if he cut it himself. Most servants were warned of his unruly temper and childish tantrums; they avoided him the best they could and it was easy with how much he stayed in his tower. He was violent… That was why he was sent away – at least, the rumors spoke of that.

The prince you grew to know wasn’t an angry person. No, he smiled with a softness, his cheeks squishing to reveal dimples. He listened as you spoke about things in your life– from the novels you had read and loved to the flowers you liked in the gardens to the work you loathed to do. (He had laughed when you mentioned you disliked when he requested bacon for the splatters of oil always burned your arms; he promised he’d request bacon less for your sake. He hadn’t requested it since.)

Namjoon enjoyed your company. You were his friend. His only friend.

He hadn’t had a friend before.

He cared for you, watched, and aided you when he could. He didn’t want you to suffer or feel alone. You were the only other teenager so far outside the kingdom’s town. It must’ve been lonely. He couldn’t imagine you hurting or else his heart felt like it’d burn up.

Even as he felt stirrings of things within him as the years went by, he focused on what you needed. A love that was selfless wasn’t second-nature to him. It was an effort. He didn’t want to be greedy and lose you. He grew fond of you beside him. His fingers intertwined with yours as you walked through the gardens, shyly at first, before it happened every time afterwards. Your hand in his was cool to the touch; he hoped you weren’t cold. He gifted you a pretty cloak a few weeks later, one that was the same shade as your favorite flower.

You leaned towards him when you read together. Sometimes your cheek was so close he could feel their warm. His lips would tingle and he couldn’t read the manuscript in his hands. All he could focus on was how pretty your skin was… how your cheeks were a reddish pink and your lips… oh your lips were so tantalizingly close for him to press a kiss to them. He swallowed down this love, keeping you close to him but guarded from himself.

Perhaps it was anxiety – the consequence of being friendless for so long. He was bashful, fearful. Him – fearful it made him want to shake his head at his foolishness. He ached to wrap you into his embrace, to shower you in kisses, to allow you to lay in his bed. But he settled for now, the softness of your friendship was a comfort. Your hand against his was still enough to get his heart racing. His love festered in his chest with the inability to grow further – if only he could speak of his fondness.

He claimed he’d try again tomorrow – and the next day – and the next.

However, as his love grew into a mess of tangled vines, an illness began to fester and choke him as well.

It had occurred when he turned twenty. At the stroke of midnight, you had knocked onto his bedroom door.

“Joonie!” Your voice chimed as he opened the door. Dressed in his pajamas, it should be improper but you had seen him in them many times before – you met him in them. His face lit up at the sight of the cake – his birthday cake. It was decorated with edible flowers from the garden and a gentle blue frosting.

“Happy Birthday!”

“Y/N,” he exclaimed. “This is beautiful – all for me?”

You giggled and he smiled wide enough his dimples peeked at you.

“Yes, your Highness,” you chuckled. “Don’t eat it all or you’ll get a stomach ache.”

“I won’t… aren’t you tired?” he asked watching you blink slow and steady like a cat.

“A bit; I wish I could stay awake longer but I wanted to be the first person to see you and wish you a happy birthday.” You claimed.

He wanted to press kisses all over your face; he wish you knew that you were sweeter than this cake. That you’d be the only one to wish him a true happy birthday. Instead, he simply place the cake aside on a desk and hugged you close.

“Thank you. I love it.” You.

You hummed happily. “I’m happy. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Not too early,” he promised. “I’ll take breakfast later, okay? Prince’s orders. Sleep in a bit.”

It was sweet. Even on his birthday he was treating you. You smiled up at him, squeezing his hand fondly.

“As you command it, oh mighty prince. But other than that, we will spend the whole day together.”

That sounded like a dream. With the door shutting behind you, he felt a giddy rush course through him. His skin warmed and his stomach filled with butterflies. Looking over at the cake, he took his finger and swiped at the frosting, tasting it. But the mere taste of the sugar felt like curdled milk in his stomach. Namjoon frowned. That didn’t make sense. Your treats were always so good. He loved this cake recipe in particular – you made it every birthday since you became friends.

Perhaps it was his excitement. His face already felt clammy. His hand shaky. Sleep claimed him quick, his cake left untouched.

He awoke in the morning to a fever, his skin burning hot.

“Stay away, Y/N,” he had called out when you insisted on helping him. A cool rag to his forehead, sweat trickled down his temple.

“You’re burning up, Joonie” you had murmured, swiping his hair aside. Once, you’d shake in your boots imagining touching the prince like this, but after your friendship grew through the years. You had stopped referring to him as your prince and simply as Namjoon, and later even Joonie – something he had smiled warmly at.

“Don’t want you to get sick,” he continued as you lifted a goblet of water to his lips.

“Shh.” You hushed as you let him sip the fresh water. It didn’t ease the fire in his veins. “You’re the one sick on your birthday.”

Namjoon’s fever didn’t break for days. It felt like his muscles were combusting, aching, and burning. No doctor had the answer. The royal family even came to visit – fearing the worse for the bedridden prince.

“Namjoonie, you better get well.” It was a light threat from Seokjin as he sat on the bedside of his younger brother. It wasn’t much of a threat when Seokjin sniffled and raised a handkerchief to his eyes. “What would I do without your aid if you left? I’d be waiting for your letters daily.”

You worked on with a watchful eye. Wringing cool rose-water from a rag to place on Namjoon’s forehead as the crown prince held onto his brother’s hand. You couldn’t decide if the first-born prince was being genuine. You noticed other things though. The way the plump lips of Seokjin were bitten raw. The trembling broad shoulders. There was a quiet to Seokjin, a timidness even if he was built and grown as a Prince; he wasn’t built to be a King. Even a servant girl could see that.

It was as interesting as it was fearful.

There was a night when he refused to let you into his bed chamber. The large clanking of a goblet hitting the tiled floors echoed, and you had rushed to the door with his name on your tongue.

“Don’t enter,” his voice was pained.

“Namjoon, what’s wrong?” you asked.

“I’m fine, I’m fine!” he sounded pained, his voice coming through gritted teeth.

Clanking and shattering objects came from within the room. You did not cease your calling. Servants whispered and gossiped about the prince having a temper tantrum in his weakened state. Some things never change.

The next morning, Namjoon’s fever broke finally. And you nearly cried of relief.

“You scared me so much,” you scolded the prince as you clung to his hand. His arms wrapped around you tight, pulling you closer and closer until you were in the bed with him. Surprised by not frightened, you remained in his arms. They trembled with a weakness, from the sickness you assumed, but they didn’t let you shift in his embrace. He held you close and breathed you in. You smelled of home. Of everything he cared for. The smell of food cooking on a hearth, of indigo flowers planted in the garden, of the vanilla hidden in old books. He trembled under your hug, but he pressed his lips to your hair, something you don’t miss. Fondness bloom in your chest like a flower.

“What happened yesterday?” you murmured, curiously.

You knew it wasn’t a temper tantrum. He didn’t do that. It wasn’t Namjoon.

He breathed out shakily. He felt… different. His skin felt tight to his bones; his muscles remained tense like a suit of armor forged into his own flesh – but he didn’t feel unwell. The fire that had burned through him had settled into a steady flow of embers through his veins. A comforting warmth, a harness-able power.

“I-I don’t know,” he lied as he held you closer.

After the illness, Namjoon held himself differently. He was taller, broader. He almost reminded you of Seokjin’s naturally wide shoulders – except Namjoon’s frame was different. More muscular, beefier.

He could lift you now, carrying you to your quarters ( which had moved to the castle, per his request ) when you fell asleep reading beside the prince. He was eating more – but maybe you simply forgot his appetite after suffering under the illness for so long. He’s moved into training again – now outside the tower he called his living quarters – something you knew he had liked to do after years of friendship.

He was different but the same. He almost seemed more at peace as he greeted you in the kitchens with a friendly kiss to your cheek.

He was bolder. Happier.

Different but good.

“Good morning, sweetheart,” he wrapped his arms around you.

It was a welcome change; Namjoon had begun to hug you closer, wrap his arms around you more and more now. Your hand moved to rest against his intertwined arms.

“Good morning, Joon.” His chin rested on your shoulder, watching as you made his plate (and yours at his request – he loved eating breakfast with you.)

“You’re in a good mood,” you commented.

“I received a letter from my brother.” he didn’t speak of Seokjin with ill-will; he had spoken of the king with a tone of discontent – detested affection - before.

“He wants me to be his Advisor.” He revealed. He sounded excited, happy. “Officially.” He turned to rest his cheek fully on your shoulder, rubbing his cheek against your servant garb. “Father is preparing to shift things around, giving Seokjin more power in decision-making.”

Which Namjoon knew Seokjin hated.

“You have worked hard. You’ll finally be able to show off that big brain of yours in front of the court,” you added as you continued to slice the apple for your individual porridges.

“Finally,” he sighed against you. Things were looking up.

He dragged his cheek against your shoulder once more before hugging you close. As he pulled away, his fingers swiped an apple slice from the tray.

“Your Highness,” you scolded, making him chuckle out as he pressed another fond kiss to your cheek.

It left tingling warmth in its wake.

You couldn’t seem to rest despite yawns tumbling from your lips. Restlessness clung to your bones, making you stand from your bed. Your gaze peered out the high window to look into the night sky. The tower room that Namjoon insisted on you having as you tended to him while he was ill was grand. It was larger than your homestead, draped in finery that you had been fearful to use. There was even a balcony to look out into the night sky – which you used now. Namjoon hadn’t asked for anything in return, simply saying he adored your company. He wanted you here. He had been kind to you; sweeter than ever.

The very thought of the prince made your heart race. Letting out a girlish giggle, your eyes continued to stargaze. Arms draping over the baluster, you pressed your cheek to the cool stonework. There were many stars you could name; Namjoon particularly enjoyed astronomy. You were naming each one you could.

There was the Chamaeleon, Corona Borealis, Lepus, Lupus, and the Dragon. Your eyes drooped sleepily when something caught your gaze. There was flicker against the midnight skies like a shadow dancing across the stars. The shape made you shudder, your eyes widening like saucers.

It looked like a dragon flying high in the sky.

You blink, blink, blinked.

It was gone. No, you know what you saw. You saw the impossible.

“What are you reading, Y/N?” Namjoon asked after catching you in the halls of the palace, curled in an alcove he knew you favored.

“Folklore,” you commented.

He noted your sleepy eyes; lavender painted your under-eye area. His brows pursed – even if you continued reading with interest.

“What’s caught your attention, sweet one?” he chuckled softly before his fingers tucked stray hairs away from your face. Fingers grazed your skin fondly. You looked up at the gentility. He lips pursed into a frown. “You look like you’ve been up all night; were you reading by candlelight again?”

Your face didn’t lighten up like he loved. It made his stomach churn a bit. His brows pursed. He was far too easy to read like your favorite book.

You tried to comfort him, shaking your head. Your cheek pressed into his large, hot hand reassuringly.

“No, no; I just – Namjoon –, “ you started a sentence, pausing in your words.

Licking your lips, your tired mind caught up to your train of thought and you had to pause.

Everyone knew the tale of the dragon bloods. Creatures who could transform at will – fire breathed into their souls, powerful and greedy but wise. They took over the throne from an evil ruler; then they ruled with wisdom for decades. It was a tall-tale you were told since childhood. But… it was just a story. How could you have seen one? And why did it strike such fear in your heart for Namjoon and the royal family? Was it an omen? Was he in danger?

Your breathing shuddered.

You couldn’t tell him. He’d find you crazy.

Your gaze shifted from his kind umber eyes to the book beneath her fingertips.

“I’ve just been engrossed in this story,” you said quietly.

It wasn’t quite a lie.

He frowned, but brushed a thumb over your cheek soft. He didn’t like you keep things from him. But he’d let you for now.

“Seokjin-hyung truly doesn’t know how to rule; what did he do during all those lessons? He knows nothing!” Namjoon lamented, flopping down beside you in the grassy riverside. It was a heavy thud of his body against the vegetation.

“Be careful,” you commented at his violent action yet he didn’t even grunt from the action.

“I would’ve loved lessons on trade routes,” he sighed out, frustratedly. His hands trailed over the wild indigo tousling in the wind. He watched the petals pass through his fingers before huffing again.

“I know, Joonie, but you learned regardless. That’s resilience.”

He hummed out an agreement. His gaze shifted from the weeds beside his head to focus on you. You were reading again. A sight he loved. He loved when you were focused, immersed in something more. It was like he could see your brain working, see the imagination flickering behind your beautiful eyes.

The leather-covered book bore the same “History of Fae & Other Creatures” title. You’ve been reading it for more than a week now. It made his curiosity spike.

“What are you so intrigued about, sweetheart?” He leaned up on his forearms, gazing up at you with flower petals and leaves clinging to his long hair.

You let out a soft chuckle at the sight, reaching out to pluck the remnants away. Why were you nervous to tell him? Would he laugh at you? He hadn’t before. You knew your fears were foolish – a Dragon wasn’t coming to destroy his family line – and him. That was… not set in reality. Its been something you’ve ruminated on night after night as you laid in your cushy bed. You could’ve seen something totally real that night – a strange bird or a kite or a very solid looking cloud that moved really fast. Right?

Fiddling with the corner of the worn page, you hemmed and hawed. Namjoon waited patiently. Smiling up at you. He’s never been cruel or mean. Surely, he’d just tell you saw nothing. That it was the sleepiness. Reassure you. He fiddled with the fabric of your dress – a new one he had made for you of indigo blue.

“I just – I’ve been thinking of dragons recently,” you finally said, turning the page.

Namjoon paused, his smile freezing. His dimples weren’t showing as the smile faded into a confused frown.

“Dragons?” he asked again. Namjoon’s blood felt hot.

“I—you’ll think I’m silly,” you said, shaking your head – your gaze hadn’t left the page. “I thought I saw one the other night. I was tired though. Maybe I just was – I don’t know, day-dreaming.”

“Maybe,” Namjoon supplied.

He felt hot.

He’d tell them soon. He promised.

Namjoon’s face was grim as he sat in the rocky carriage. Stuck in the royal attire he often disregard around the palace, his limbs felt tight and itchy; his fine silver crown atop perfectly styled locks. His hair had been cut, by your hand at the insistence of the maids and caretakers. He was a Prince not some long-haired pirate! He felt wrong. Everything felt wrong. He was stuck in a carriage far away from you and only taking him further and further away by the second. It left him worrying. A pit growing in his stomach as the carriage shuttered against the rocky path.

Even if he hadn’t spoken his love to you, you hadn’t rejected his affections. His soft kisses to your cheek, his embraces where his hands remained respectfully at your waist, or his affectionate nicknames. It was more than friendship, surely you knew that. You weren’t dumb. You were the smartest woman he’d met. It was one of the many things he loved about you.

He felt anxiety creep up at the thought of the castle unprotected by him. You were unprotected. It made the fire splutter and splatter like lava within his soul.

But he had a duty – not to his father, but Seokjin.

It’ll be okay. You’ll be okay.

The castle was a day’s journey, one that he handled as gracefully as one could. Soon enough, he was back in his childhood home – yet it felt unlike the true home he left behind. Bereft figures, dull colors of dark blacks decorated the halls. Sobs filled the streets.

After all, the King was dead.

Seokjin was going to be crowned – and soon.

It was the night after the funeral. Seokjin had barged his way into Namjoon’s quarters – a forgotten childhood bedroom. Everything had been left where Namjoon had place it. His dragon stuffed animal sat on the window’s ledge, looking out.

At least it has been, before Seokjin had picked it up and fiddled with it. Squeezing it, tossing it between his large palms, hugging it.

“I can’t do this, Joonie,” Seokjin hyperventilated.

“What are you talking about, hyung?” Namjoon tried to understand.

“The crown,” he blurted out. “The ceremonies. The ruling. The laws. The court. I’m not—I can’t. I’m not – built for this.”

Seokjin was trembling; his fingers digging into the stuffed animal harshly. His lips were bitten red, bleeding.

“You’ve grown up learning for this,” Namjoon countered, disbelievingly. “Its your-“

“I don’t care!” Seokjin cried out. “I—I never wanted the crown. I never—I can’t handle the pressures; Father, before he passed, he knew – he knew. He said if the crown failed in my hands that I’d go to hell. That I’d be cursed to be outcasted. History rewritten. He called me weak – he called me-“ Seokjin was sobbing. Namjoon had never seen his brother cry before.

“I don’t know what to do. You do.”

You know how to rule.

“Help me, Joonie. Please. Please I revoke my crown. I revoke it. I revoke it to you.”

There was a jostling outside your balcony, waking you with a start. A grand wind pounded on the glass panels ferociously, rattling and creaking them violently. Your eyes flashed open and you looked about bewildered.

There had been no wind when you fell asleep. Especially not so violent.

“What is going on?” Your fear made you jump, holding the covers to your form as if that could protect you.

You saw no clouds nor tells of rain or wind last night. But now, it was almost like your window frame was trembling from the force outside.

Standing to look, what you saw nearly made you faint. There, outside your window – perched awkwardly on your stone balcony’s balusters – was a dragon. Larger than you by an incredible amount. Its form wasn’t even at its grandest; you could see its body was curling inwards; its large clawed paws were shifting underneath it as it balanced, almost similar to a cat. Its wings were outstretched wide, the width of them taking up the length of many men. It didn’t look threatening; there was no fire or brimstone. Instead, it almost looked clumsy. It was far too large for the foundation beneath itself. The stonework gave a horrible groan, loud and bellowing from the creature’s weight.

A scream was on your lips, aching to tear out of your throat – but before you could, you saw before your very eyes the dragon begin to tremble and shrink until… there was no dragon there anymore. No, it was just Namjoon.

Namjoon was on your balcony.

Rippling muscles shuddering as he stumbled off of the stone baluster and towards you a wild look in his eyes.

“Y/N,” you could hear him even with your balcony window shut – however, not for long, as you promptly fainted.

He was a dragon.

“Darling,” you could hear a soft croon. “Oh, my sweet girl.”

Your head ached, but you could still recognize that voice anywhere. It was the same voice that had read you countless novels in the field of flowers by the gardens.

“Joon?” you queried in your drowsiness.

Blinking your eyes, you look up to see him, clad in his royal attire – the very attire he had left in – sitting beside you in your quarters.

“I’m so sorry,” he pleaded, rushing to press kisses to your knuckles. His crowned head bowing towards you in regret.

He hadn’t thought about how it could startle you – all he could think was he had to return home. Had to discuss things with you – his only friend, his love, his confidant.

“I—I, did—I had the strangest dream,” you murmur out. “You were a—” Your gaze traveled to the window, now open to where you had seen the creature perched in your dreams. Only to see the shattered stonework. The broken balusters laid messily in front of the gargoyles.

“A dragon,” Namjoon supplied, quietly. Almost bashfully like that morning you met.

Your eyes drifted back to him. His umber eyes were fiery, even if they were glancing away almost boyishly shy.

“What?” you asked quiet. “Namjoon, what?”

He swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing a bit. His head tilted downwards. All the fire of a dragon he had – but its courage he still lacked, he scolded himself.

He lacked when it came to you; selfishly afraid and yearning to protect and shield you away from him.

“I’m a dragon blood. I-I learned about it a few months ago,” he said. “After my illness, I had these abilities. These powers…”

You stared at him; partial awe, partial fear, partial confusion, and partial betrayal painted your features.

Before you slapped at his shoulder, angrily.

“You—” You nearly curse at him, anger peaking.

His hands went to capture yours before you could slap at him again. Firm but not painful, his grasp was one of desperation as his brows crinkled in despair.

“I know; I know. I didn’t tell you. How would you have reacted?” he rambled on. “You would’ve thought me mad; you would’ve left me alone. You would’ve never spoken to me.”

His fear was laid out in a rush– you leaving him.

“I couldn’t bear that.” he whispered ardently.

“So, you lied!” you bitterly exclaimed. Your hands – now curled into childish fists – couldn’t shift in his grasp. He was strong.

“You never asked!” Namjoon countered smiling awkwardly. Your glare shut him up, his mouth opening and closing as his eyes shut. “That doesn’t matter I know. You can be angry later, please. I have news from the kingdom. I need you!”

A Dragon never needed anyone. But he needed her. He always would.

“Seokjin is going to revoke the crown – and I’ll be crowned king.” He said out in a flurry.

Once again, as if a bomb was dropped on you, your mouth dropped open.

“He’s revoking the crown?”

Namjoon nodded, almost excitedly. You could see flames dance in his eyes – had that always happened?

“This is horrible!” you murmured out, fear written in your face.

Nightmares of disasters flickered through your mind. Namjoon and Seokjin being killed in an uprising. Namjoon being prevented taking the throne. Seokjin lying to cause Namjoon’s death. So many worst-case scenarios flickered through your mind. Your mind was an expert at plotting the worse. Even if the dragon you saw was him – it could be a warning. He could be a warning of worse things to come.

“Darling?” Namjoon asked, his voice gentle as he saw your outburst – your fear and disapproval were the opposite of what he predicted.

“Seokjin doesn’t want the crown,” Namjoon reassured, hands leaving your wrists to cup your face. Tilting it his way to watch your mind rush faster and faster. He licked his lips as he saw your mouth shuddered.

“If you do this, Namjoon, the kingdom will be in uproar; they will fight against a shift in power – even if it’s as peaceful as your brother granting you the throne.” You countered. “It’s signing a war declaration.”

He let out a huff of a growl, smoke tumbling from his nose. His impatience bubbled up. He didn’t like being told that he couldn’t do something; he never had.

The smoke shocked you, but somehow not enough to scare you. It was just… new.

“I don’t want a war,” you said looking at him with a look he hadn’t seen before. Desperation and yearning. Longing. It was complex and somber and… soulful. He felt like he saw your soul for a moment. And it was scared for him. You didn’t want him harmed or put into harm’s way in any way. “And I don’t want you fighting in it.”

Want. Want. Want.

Namjoon wanted too. He wanted so much over the years. He had wanted his family’s love. He didn’t receive it. He wanted to learn. He was given road block after road block. He wanted you, all of you. And he forbade himself.

He wanted the throne. He wanted what he deserved. He wanted respect. Your breath left in a soft huff of a sigh. You pushed yourself up to sit higher on your bed, closer in his embrace, his hands sliding to your jaw to accommodate.

“I don’t want you getting hurt, Joonie.”

His fiery gaze eased a bit at your words. You were precious. Kind-hearted, gentle. His only true friend. His. And as a dragon blood, he was greedy. You were a treasure he didn’t know he hoarded. Until now.

“I don’t fear anything anymore. At least nothing like that.” he commented softly. “Not after the change.” He shifted from the floor to your bed, his tall form towered over you, but you didn’t feel discomfort as he embraced you. His thumb caressed over the soft supple skin of your cheeks, lovingly. “Why should a monster fear anything he can devour?”

You think if someone else had said those words a shiver would go down your spine. But it was Kim Namjoon. The very Namjoon who you’ve known for so many years. Namjoon – the prince who didn’t tattle on you – a servant girl – when you were avoiding work. Namjoon – who learned botany because you said you loved the wild indigos you found on the path between the castle and your homestead. Namjoon – who would sit beside you and point at the words you couldn’t decipher from old folklore scripts and ramble on and on about the history of them. Namjoon – the man who would grab your hand and sneak down to the river’s shores to skip stones with you. Namjoon - who had pressed soft kisses to your forehead when you fell asleep beside him in the grand library. Namjoon – who gently took your hand in between his as he confessed how much you meant to him beside the hearth of the fireplace.

Namjoon – the son of the Dragon, the inheritor of the flame – the rightful heir of the kingdom as a dragon blood.

It felt like two separate people – but even now, when his hand slid to your jaw – you could see both sides of him. The powerful being and the gentle giant. He would fight to protect you. And you knew deep down you would fight to protect him.

“Don’t be afraid,” he murmured lowly. “Of me, of a war.” He clarified. “What I am now – what awoke within me - is bulletproof, darling; I will not fail us. I will protect you and my kingdom.” And with that, he leant down, cupping your cheeks, and kissed your lips for the first time.

You swore you could taste fire-smoke and ash on his lips.

#namjoon x reader #kim namjoon x reader #bts x reader #bts fantasy au #bts fanfiction #namjoon fanfic #namjoon x you #bts x you #bts fanfic #namjoon scenario #namjoon reaction #namjoon angst #bts dragon au #dragon namjoon #written by Haley

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trustfratedjin · 1 year ago

Text

BANGTAN OT7 FIC RECS VOL. 1

Aight, here we go

Keep in mind that the 18+ warning does NOT only apply to smut, so please read the individual warnings on EVERY fic, thank yeowww :)

OT7

Idol!AU

Little Do You Know by @yoongiofmine Complete 18+

Relax, It’s Our Honeymoon! by @birchandspruce Complete 18+

You Complete Us by birchandspruce Complete

wild, wild, wilderness by @kimnjss Complete 18+

home sweet castle by kimnjss Complete 18+

The Plot Twist ft Soulmate!AU by @blog-name-idk Ongoing 18+

The Line Between Love And War ft Soulmate!AU by @purpleyoonn Ongoing

baby (you complete us) ft Soulmate!AU by purpleyoonn Ongoing 18+

Unorthodox by @beahae Ongoing 18+

The curious move-in to apartment 27 by @sor-vette Ongoing 18+

Got the music in you baby by @minniedaisies One Shot

Love Starved by @hollyhomburg One Shot 18+

The Sex Strike by @borathae One Shot 18+

Soulmate!AU

The Book of Soulmates by @alpacaparkaseok Complete

Moonchild by @jeonggukkiepabo Ongoing? idk hehe 18+

Mafia!AU

Between The Bloodshed by @agustdakasuga Complete 18+

Ethereal ft Fantasy!AU by purpleyoonn Complete 18+

Ride With you by @jellifysh Ongoing 18+

The Way Of A Criminal by agustdakasuga Ongoing 18+

Thou Shall Not Steal by @xherxx Ongoing 18+

A/B/O!AU

House of the Omegaverse ft Dark!AU by @sopejinsunflower Complete 18+

Lone Wolf by @sopebubbles Ongoing 18+

Before I leave you ft Dark!AU by @hollyhomburg (READ THE TW FOR REAL) Ongoing 18+

Royal!AU / Historical!AU

The Return of an Empress by @you-are-my-joy Complete 18+

Fall of Empire by @aloneatpeace Ongoing 18+

Hybrid!AU

Abundance by @angelicyoongie Ongoing 18+

100% sure i've read more but i can't remember any of em rn lol

Dark!AU

Death Valley by @bangtangalicious Complete 18+

College!AU

Everything Falls (Into Place) by blog-name-idk Complete 18+

Thesis It by xherxx Complete 18+

The Apartment Games by @softiejoon Maybe discontinued but here for the aesthetics

Kings of Campus by @luxekook Ongoing 18+

Journey to the dick by @whatifyoulivelikethat One Shot 18+

Sharing is Caring by @theharrowing One Shot 18+

Fantasy!AU

Recrudescence ft Idol!AU by @chimchimsauce Complete 18+

To have, to hold, to make you stay by sor-vette Complete 18+

Other

All the Kinks ft Multifandom, Multi!AU’s by @helvonasche Complete 18+

Getting Back Into The Swing Of Things by jellifysh Complete 18+

Boyfriend for Hire by @remedyx Ongoing 18+

Audios by @youmyjhope 18+

Sh. by @wwilloww Ongoing? idk hehe 18+

NOT OT7

Idol!AU

Need by @bang-tan-bitches ft KNJ, JHS and MYG ft A/B/O!AU Complete 18+

The bias room by @chimivx ft MYG, KTH and JJK One Shot

Desperate by borathae ft PJM, KTH and JJK One Shot 18+

Floored by @lavienjin ft JHS, PJM, JJK One Shot 18+

College!AU

Stretch You Out by @chateautae ft KNJ and JJK One Shot 18+

Fantasy!AU

bitten & knotted by @jamaisjoons ft JHS and KNJ One Shot 18+

Other

Magic Hands by @breadoffoxy ft PJM and KTH Complete 18+

Fucking Around by @tanniefm ft PJM, KTH and JJK One Shot 18+

The Art Of Self Restraint by @scribblemetae ft PJM, KTH and JJK One Shot 18+

The Sope Surprise by @chelsea-chee ft JHS and MYG One Shot 18+

The D Box by breadoffoxy ft KSJ, MYG and JJK One Shot 18+

Swiss Miss by @here4kpopfics ft KNJ and KSJ One Shot 18+

Bigger & Better by lavienjin ft KNJ and KTH One Shot 18+

Package Deal by @hoseokhasmyheartxx ft JHS and MYG One Shot 18+

Rain On Me by @dawnagustd ft KTH and JJK One Shot 18+

When i tell you my hand is cramped from all the clicking and my eyes are blurry for staring at the screen for 8+ hours...

AND THIS IS HOW WE CONCLUDE 1/9 REC POSTS WUUUU

Stay tuned because I still have to post the recs from each member and one final giving a massive shoutout to all my favorite BTS fic authors of all time (including everyone here and many more hehe)

You'll notice that some authors weren't properly tagged, that's cause tumblr wouldn't let me tag more than 50 users, so I made sure to tag the writers AT LEAST ONE TIME in case there were more than one of their works mentioned here :)

Btw, if any of the links don't work or there is a mistake or anything, please let me know so I can fix it :)

BANGTAN'S HYUNG LINE FIC RECS VOL. 1

BANGTAN'S MAKNAE LINE FIC RECS VOL. 1

#trustfratedjin's fic recs #bts fic rec #bts smut #bts x reader #ot7 x reader #bts fanfic #bts x you #bts fic #jungkook smut #taehyung smut #jimin smut #hoseok smut #yoongi smut #seokjin smut #namjoon smut #bts fic recs

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peachywritess · 2 years ago

Text

Unmei | OT7

bangtan (OT7) x fem!reader

02 - curse

☁️ unmei – 運命 (うんめい): a noun meaning 'fate’ or ‘destiny’ in Japanese.

☁️ genre: royal!AU, OT7!AU, reincarnation!AU ; smut (eventually), angst.

☁️ Unmei will deal with very delicate and quite dark themes, so please if you are a minor, DO NOT interact. I will always put a trigger warning at the start of every chapter, so if you feel unconfortable DO NOT read. ☁️

☁️ author’s note: hello lovelies, author here! i'm so sorry for the delay, and i know i've already said i had a rough week,, but still forgive me ! <(qwq<) it's quite a short chapter and we're still introducing all the situation, but next chapter will be veery interesting >:3

☁️ chapter’s TW: mentions of death, blood, anxiety (guilt),

☁️ word count: 2,3k

☁️ taglist @shabbamadapot @jnghs @iriaachan;

! disclaimer - This story is a work of fiction. I do not own BTS and the description of them in this story does not want to reflect nor portray them in real life.

"Do you think we will ever be able to fly?"

Taehyung looked away, turning his head to his right, focusing on you. It was a beautiful day, a few clouds coating the sky and the sun warming the skin: spring was just around the corner. You were both lying down on the grass covered in morning dew, heedless of your slightly damp clothes. Your parents had no knowledge of your whereabouts since you should have been at the castle while they were on a business trip.

His dark eyes seemed to reflect the sunlight - if not emit it.

His face relaxed, and one hand was open to mask the sun to be able to look at you entirely; he gazed at you as one does with sunsets. Every time you spoke, a smile came to light on his lips, something that you hardly noticed since you were constantly lost in your thoughts, in your endless speeches that he - in fact - adored. He would listen to you talk for hours.

"We have conquered the seas, the oceans... Do you think we will never conquer the skies?"

You contemplated for a few moments, gazing at the blue vastness above you; your smallness was considerable compared to everything up there, but you still couldn't look away although frightening it was, feeling so insignificant.

"I really envy birds. They can do whatever they want. If they need to escape, they can..."

"You shouldn't." The man at your side breathed softly, still intent on analysing every detail of your face. "If you lock them in a cage, they become powerless and can do nothing. Whereas you, Y/N, you can change your fate."

Your gaze abruptly saddened, and you bit the inside of your cheek as if to mask that sign of weakness. Unlike Taehyung, you were certain that your fate would never change, and that you would forever be shackled by your status.

"Maybe you're right." You lied, knowing that - in his heart - Taehyung felt the same way.

Things happen for a reason. Or, that's what you're supposed to think when life kicks you in the stomach - luckily, you were never an hopeless optimistic, you always decided to face life, and strike harder.

A few weeks had already passed since your father's assassination and, although the King's guards had searched for the culprit, every attempt of finding them had been unsuccessful. To keep people quiet, and to avoid unnecessary riots, they had decided to hang an innocent for his death.

You had been forced to watch the hanging - being the only heir to the throne - and it was you who had given the verdict to the victim.

Yes, you considered that man a victim, since he had done nothing wrong and was tortured to confess a crime he hadn't committed. Nevertheless, you were used to the tapestry of lies woven by the royalty to prevent any type of repercussions.

He had begged you to let him live, but you could not stop reading the sentence imposed to him. It was your duty afterall, wasn't it? You had to fulfil it, no matter the consequences.

Call their bluff. Say something now, spare his life.

"I therefore sentence you to death by hanging for the conspiracy and murder of the King."

You affirmed desperately attempting to sound convinced of the words pouring out of your mouth. You never even managed to look at him in the eye as you falsely accused him, letting his fate come to such an abrupt end.

"Please, I beg you, Princess. Your soul is still pure, do not dirt your hands with blood."

Although his hands were chained, the man threw himself at your feet, bowing until his nose touched the ground.

"Stop this injustice, in the name of His Highness, your Father."

You swallowed the knot that formed in your throat, frowning and shifting your gaze, unable to look at him.

"Please, no! No, don't do this to me, Princess!"

Two guards had grabbed him by the forearms, beginning to drag him towards what would be his end. You had decided to look away.

"This decision of yours will have consequences, Y/N. May you be cursed in this life and the next, for everyone you love will abandon you."

A sense of uneasiness held you rigid, as a heavy weight had placed down on you. You felt crawls all over your body, prickling at your skin.

He's just a man, he said those things out of fear. You tried to reassure yourself as you beginned to walk away, steps getting faster by the second.

The moment you turned away, letting the man be taken by the guards, you met Taehyung's gaze; his jaw was clenched, and you realized he was restraining himself from unsheathing the sword and save that man. However, he could never do so without endangering you. He - as a royal guard - could not have questioned the Queen's decisions, for that he would have cast doubt on your reputation too.

He made sure you didn't notice his eyes locked on you. He didn't want you to carry another burden on your shoulders - not at that moment. He perfectly knew that you felt like you had failed him.

You walked up the steps to the balcony on which were placed the ceremonial seats used by the royal family for centuries to attend celebrations or, in this case, executions. They faced exactly the wide earthen courtyard, on which the scaffold had been placed: you almost collapsed in your chair so much your legs were shaking.

You sat next to your mother, who kept her gaze straight at the patibulum without ever looking at you. She had said that - seeing your face - reminded her of her husband and that your presence made her nauseous.

"I'm surprised you managed not to stutter."

Her tone was harsh, just as it had always been. You had no fond memories of your mother, all you reminisced was the way she belittled everything you did.

The only time you had seen her differently, was when she had learned about your father's death. You always thought that you and her were as different as you were incompatible. You believed you had greater sensitivity… But of the two, you were the one who hadn't shed a single tear.

Your mind was as if barricaded in the illusion that nothing had truly happened. You couldn't know it yet, but that apparent good fortune would reveal itself as a double-edged sword sooner than you thought.

Your mother hadn't apologised to you for what she had said - you couldn't even understand what she was feeling. The man she had married, the man she loved more than her own life, was gone forever without even saying goodbye.

Now, she was doing the same thing to that innocent's man life. Ironic, wasn't it?

"That man is innocent." You replied monotonously with your eyes locked on the marble floor. You didn't dare raise your head, fearing to see that man getting murdered in front of you, fearing to see those eyes again.

You heard the crowd cheering and clapping, and you immediately knew.

"Was." She corrected you like she was speaking to a child, "No one cares, as long as our interest is satisfied. You too should think this way, to be at least an ounce of what your Father has been."

One thing you loved was to hide in the greenhouse, located only a few steps away from the main garden. The structure had existed for several years, and was now completely abandoned. Ivy had now completely covered the large windows, allowing light to enter only through the ceiling.

The warm rays of sunlight shyly caressed the plants. Nevertheless, the most distinctive thing about that place was the presence of a nest of doves. By now, the greenhouse had become their home, and you were nothing a frequent guest.

You were crouched down so that your knees were touching your chest, and you were pouring water into the soil - a small sprout was starting to grow. You were looking at its light yellow shades, that made you wonder if it would ever change colour - it was so delicate, making you feel desperate to protect it.

As you carefully caressed the leaves, you watched your hands. You blinked multiple times rubbing your eyes, feeling like something had gotten in one of them; as your sight recovered, and the blurriness disappeared, you watched your hands again - now, you froze.

Your hands were trembling, palms right in front of you, as you saw blood covering them. You started breathing unsteadily until a hand rested on your shoulder.

You were about to shriek, yet when you turned around your heart seemed to relax and beat normally again.

Taehyung slightly bent his head to the side, watching you with a questioning look on his face, frowning. You, on the other hand, brought a hand to your chest, letting out a relieved sigh.

"Please don't do that again. I didn't hear you coming."

"Actually, I called out to you several times." He now began to shout your name as if to show what he had done to get your attention, so you shoved him slightly.

"Oh, stop it." You giggled, and his smile grew.

The dark-haired man looked around several times, eyes scanning every detail of the place to make sure there was no one there. As soon as he made sure you were completely alone, he quickly placed a soft kiss on your lips.

"How are you feeling, love?"

Being in his company always made you nervous, because it wasn't often that you were alone and - above all - Taehyung was the most unpredictable person you knew.

The longer he kept his gaze on you, the more you felt yourself consumed like wax exposed to the heat of a match.

You knew very well that, at this point, he wanted you to be honest with him: he still didn't know about Jimin and what you had been told about the wedding, let alone mentioned what the man accused of your father's murder had told you a few days earlier.

You lied to Taehyung, and it wasn't because you didn't trust him, but the reason was very simple: you didn't want to make his life more complicated than it already was. Knowing you, you thought, was the greatest of all his problems.

"I am fine, the flowers are blooming."

It was a half-truth - or a half-lie, but you were really enthusiastic for Spring to arrive. When the flowers blossomed, you finally perceived the colours of the world.

The man before you, however, did not seem entirely satisfied with the answer, as his mouth twisted slightly.

"You know that's not what I'm referring to, Y/N."

His voice was calm, but his expression was stern.

"I really don't know what you are trying to tell me, Tae. I am fine, I am recovering."

"Y/N, your father was murdered and a few days ago you witnessed the death of a man, you are not recovering."

He had a point, anyone in the same situation as you would have thrown themselves to the ground, pulled out their hair, and cried endlessly. But despite experiencing pain and an incredible sense of guilt, somehow you were incapable of externalizing it.

Every time you closed your eyes, you saw that man's face, all you did was dream about him at night. He repeated the same sentence, while his eyes seemed to pop out of their sockets.

May you be cursed in this life and the next, for everyone you love will abandon you.

"It's all my fault, I could have saved him, I-"

"What could you have done, Y/N? Turn against your mother and the Kingdom? He was only a man, nothing more."

"He wasn't just a man!" You replied, raising your tone as if to defend the man you too had failed. "He was an innocent man, he had a family, Taehyung!"

"Y/N, I understand."

"No, you don't! I let my father's death and the wedding cloud my judgement…"

You realised it almost as quickly as he did. Your eyes widened in sheer panic and before you could even think about it, one of your hands went to cover your mouth - but it was too late.

"What are you talking about? What wedding?"

You remained silent as Taehyung began to run a hand over his face, stroking his skin until it almost reddened.

"Answer me, which marriage are you talking about, Y/N."

Betrayal can stab you in the back any time; it can take your breath away.

But you were witnessing it in the eyes of the one you loved, and you only had yourself to blame.

"Tae, I am so sorry, I…" You stuttered unable to form a proper sentence.

"Allow me to interfere."

All at once, both you and Taehyung turned towards the voice breaking in seemingly out of nowhere.

"What this sweet princess is trying to explain to you is that she will be marrying me."

Taehyung glared at the newly-introduced figure with hostility, pure, undiluted anger stirred within him.

"And who the fuck are you?" He hissed between gritted teeth.

The stranger took a few steps forward, and it was then that a few streams of light lit up his face. He looked much younger, but his figure was well formed and muscular. As soon as his chocolate-brown eyes rested on you, he smiled, showing bunny-like teeth.

"Jeon Jungkook, delighted to make your acquaintance."

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