#balmung roleplayer

[zell-bell]

I have a feeling that if there’s something you want badly enough, nothing will stop you.~

[erahsae-ffxiv]

Buscarron's Druthers Open Roleplay

At 8PM US Eastern on Balmung, there are number of folks gathering at Buscarron's Druthers for some open world / walk up roleplay like we used to focus on back in the day. This isn't an event, just a gathering of people. It's also not limited to just Tuesday nights, but we'd like to encourage anyone to head out there when you need a location for 'something to do'.

It's time to get our stories intermingling again instead of just existing during pre-planned events. (Yes, I know the big weekly gatherings of Buscarron's in planned, but I'd love to see the place getting back to being populated daily like it was before the expansion.)

For letting people know if you're out on other days, there's a few options: The Wandering Roleplayers group / fellowship is excellent for this or finding walk-up roleplay elsewhere in the world: (https://discord.gg/RBfngQq) You can also ping in the Buscarron's discord we've set up for 'job postings' and informal gathering pings at: (https://discord.gg/mnRt5gWHkN)

[gatheredfates]

Azuma Yumishi, Siyoh Mari and The Fireside invites you to share in their Lunar New Year Celebrations this SATURDAY 10 February at 8pm AEDT! US/EU players can see the event in their time zone at a glance here OR by joining our discord.

WHAT IS THE FIRESIDE? Once a humble coffee shop nestled in the heart of a great free company, The Fireside was the go-to place for members of Firelight Trading Company looking for a bite to eat after a long mission. Realising its potential as both a meeting place and a means of capital, its proprietor expanded the business throughout the various city-states of Eorzea until The Fireside became synonymous with coffee, company and great food; sourly needed after the anguish of The Final Days. Now, patrons old and new can gather to enjoy the hospitality and cosy atmosphere these avenues provide. This establishment was made to focus on the creation and fostering of late-night/oceanic roleplay in the Final Fantasy XIV community. Though physically located in Balmung/Crystal’s Shirogane, the Fireside’s expansion into almost all the city-states creates a space where your character can walk in from almost anywhere, and our focus on a coffee-shop with a laid-back atmosphere encourages off-the-cuff, casual roleplay. "I'm not a late night roleplayer," you claim! You're still welcome to join our discord and hang with some night-owls or forward this on to any of your oceanic/insomniac friends. We'd appreciate it!

[fourtharbiter]

October 5th, 2013.

Ten years ago today, the first formal Grindstone event happened on the Balmung server in Final Fantasy XIV. The game had only relaunched as A Realm Reborn a month and change earlier, but already the roleplaying community was coming together to establish, well, a community.

Originally started by the Eorzea Free Trade Company as a more low-key place for roleplay, there were only two rules if you wanted to participate: No killing, no magic. At the time, the community at large didn't really have a ton of lore to go on; Everything was new and exciting and not everybody had the means to level everything all at once. The ceiling for what people wanted to express in the play space was so high you couldn't really see it from the ground, and that's exactly where the Grindstone was designed to exist.

Let the High Mages have their omnipotence and unimaginable power. We just wanted to fight.

...I say "we" as if I was there from the beginning. I wasn't. I only heard about it some time later, and to demonstrate how immature I was as a roleplayer at the time, I thought the idea was kind of absurd on its face. Rolling dice to see if you succeed? That's entirely random! It's unfair! That means... GASP! I might LOSE to someone I feel I shouldn't! It's a mentality that I (and many others who got a better grasp of what the point of the event was) would grow out of. It wasn't about winning. It was about the writing.

Within the first year there was the expected churn of organizing and hosting an event; Volatility between players and factions, the fact that a weekly schedule in primetime meant your Saturdays were locked down if you wanted to stay consistent, real life getting involved and forcing absences or changes. Sigyn Shieldbreaker gave way to Sindl Arahan. Sindl gave way to a loose coalition of people familiar with the rules. For a brief period of time, the future of the event was uncertain. That's when I figured "Hell, I can do this."

Ta-da.

I have a lot of extremely fond memories at the Grindstone. I've got a lot of not-so-fond memories, too. More than that, so do a laundry list of other people. The Grindstone means a lot to me, but the fact that it also means so much to other people is really what makes me proud of what the event has achieved over the years. Strangers met and became friends. Sometimes more than that (I would still like an invite to the wedding when it happens). Stories were etched, characters were developed. People who had no idea what roleplaying was about walked by, saw a crowd and hung out. Every night was anyone's night, and everyone has a story to tell.

A fishing rod. A frying pan. Arrows tipped with paint. Someone fighting with hair brushes. Impossible come-from-behind victories. That time someone fighting for the first time winning the whole show. The several dozen times that happened, in fact. The time that one guy wrote "attaks with all his mite" and nearly won the night. That hand that got cut off. That lady who emoted giving birth on the sidelines. That kid who kept trying to fight. "FOOOOOORE!"

If you attended the Grindstone at any point of the years, at least one of those probably just touched a memory. That's the thing I keep thinking about as we're on the cusp of this event turning ten years old. Ten! The Grindstone's seen three US presidents, five English Prime Ministers, outlasted the Confederacy by twofold! Children who were not yet conceived when the first fights happened are now old enough for you to talk to and have a conversation with.

The list of names involved both in front of the curtain and behind it is entirely too long to name, or even recall. At least for me. I'm incredibly proud that folks have volunteered their time and their nights and their energy and efforts to make sure the Grindstone exists and will continue to do so. I'm happy that so many people, even if they only showed up once and didn't really like it, at least got to experience it. They got to take something away from it. The Grindstone got dropped into the middle of an extremely large lake and boy did we make some ripples.

Today is October 5th. It's not a date many people could recall many details about, but for me it's always going to be special, even if I wasn't actually there the first night. I hope that everyone who got to experience the Grindstone in their own way feels that way, too. That sometime when the air is just right and someone notices it's a Saturday night, that they can just know that the Grindstone is happening in the same place it always has been.

Everyone night is anyone's night. This coming Saturday, it's everyone's night.

[hadeselegy]

━━━━━━━━━━━ BENJI OR SASHA

━━━━━━━━ he / they. 22. roleplayer and writer.

━━━━━━ you can find my characters carrds here!

━━━━ hi, i'm benji or sasha, and i'm looking for ffxiv rp mutuals! i've been roleplaying on and off for about 5 years and writing even longer. i have a raiding character on primal, as well as two (probably more to come) roleplay alts on crystal! if you'd like to rp or hang out in game, my in game names are: amias iryut @ balmung, and male wife @ balmung.

i'm a bit shy, but i promise i don't bite. please feel free to reach out if either of my characters interest you!

[dukeofishgard]

I posted about it on Twitter and it seems a lot of ppl also agree with me, but it is super bizarre to me, as I start poking at new venues to possibly visit to RP at with Duke (he and Dracyn are overdue for a date night) the sudden influx of venues that charge actual gil for their food and drink.

This was pretty unheard of during what was, imo, the "heyday" of FFXIV rp, particularly on Crystal/Balmung. It was always "gil is for immersion only, tips appreciated!" And oftentimes Dracyn and I would tip oocly because the venues we'd go to were not only cool, but even on busy nights the people running them would take the time to interact, and oftentimes remember regulars who'd make it a point to come back weekly, and that was 10000% worth both the experience and to let the roleplayers know that they were doing an awesome job.

But charging people 5k per drink, for what (especially if it's ends up busy.) amounts to someone roleplaying handing you a drink, is absurd lmao. If you have to charge people to roleplay with you - i honestly wonder if you're roleplaying because you ... enjoy roleplaying? And considering most people are gonna have their characters sit and chill, 2-3 drinks will wind up being 15k actual gil, and again. For what will likely be a completely a bare bones interaction because there's venues also charging for table services upwards of 50k+ gil (per hr) for personalized unlimited drinks and service. The server at the bar is gonna be swamped and they're not gonna give a damn about actually engaging in roleplaying with visitors cos they're gonna be overwhelmed!

And I get it - nobody is forcing anyone to go to these venues (tho I had a friend who went to one, was told it was not real gil paid for drinks, and then... were told to cough up the gil as they left lol.) and I've written off a few already despite my initial interest.

But it's a very odd thing for me to see, especially as someone who's been roleplaying for 20 yrs, not including XIV rp.

And also the pricing is *absurd*.

Again, 5k for a drink, and its not even like they're crafting and handing you an actual in game item in return. (Those venues are even more rare, but I could understand that a little more as they're giving you actual items in return.) But 5k gil for a fake drink? That doesn't even make sense on a monetary level.

Like, for reference - I run events for FFVII twt rp. Here's the menus for our 7th Heaven Night:

And while I joked to my fellow mods/admins who help run the events that we should put our cash app up when we do the events (a joke). These prices make more sense than charging 5k gil for:

"/em hands <player name> a triple deluxe rainbow titty twister supreme on a coaster."

Like huh?

Ultimately it makes me sad, and again - i recognize that I do not have to patronize these venues (and won't) but it also just - why? Roleplay isn't a job. We're all writing make believe, and I was under the impression - because we all love writing. Or at least, that's why I roleplay. And as someone who's worked in venues, and has been given ooc tips out of nowhere - that beats the hell out of nickel and diming players for the "luxury" of roleplaying with me/at my venue. Because then you know they're not doing because you're breaking their kneecaps - they did it because they enjoyed the experience.

Ok rant over.

[sasha-rochester]

As a returning player, Balmung feels so foreign to me now. The RP community is the largest it’s ever been, but it somehow feels a lot more isolated and lonely than back when I left in Stormblood.

I kind of miss being able to have walk-up RP in the quicksand, when Roleplayers weren’t pushed out of their own spaces and into the pearl lane. Yes, World Travel did more good than harm, but I feel like we lost something after the surge of a billion level 10 wanderer/traveller alts just AFKing in Ul’dah, or engaging in Balmung tourism because they think they’re gonna witness something “dirty”.

Like, I feel like a lot of people come to Balmung thinking they’re going to witness something ExCiTinG and when they don’t, they start shit in shout chat. Hell, I hardly see locals in Ul’dah at all. Kinda bothers me that Balmung gets the reputation of being the “erp” server while 90% of the ERP alts in the QS aren’t even Balmung natives.

Shout chat is entertaining but… I don’t know. I guess I’m just not really used to it yet… Or maybe I’m being a boomer, lmao.

[korparkour]

About Korparkour

Hey there! I'm a 40+ enby (they/them) roleplayer that's been roleplaying in MMOs for over two decades. I love character development, writing micro-fics, enbies with green hair, and decorating. Sometimes I draw stuff. This is my FFXIV main blog for roleplaying, character inspo, and general fuckery. My long-time OOC main is @wolftabard.

Characters

Wandering Grin (Balmung) - wandering-grin.carrd.co

Arden Baen (Mateus) - ardenbaen.carrd.co

Preferences

YES - Queer & queer friendly writing partners.

YES -Logically bending lore without outright breaking it.

YES -Serious stories that leave room for happy endings & humor.

YES -People to swap writing prompts with on tumblr dot com.

NO - Random solicitation for ERP / Romance

NO - TERFs / that guy.

Tags

Wandering Grin

writing • screenshots • art • inspiration • asks 

Arden Baen

writing • screenshots • art • inspiration • asks

OOC 

ooc asks • shitposts • friend’s characters • a mood 

[wyrmguardsecrets]

I feel as if WoW is the only, and I mean ONLY, MMO I've ever played where people get obsessively, worryingly insane over OOC chatter on RP realms. FFXIV doesn't have 'official' RP realms, but Balmung/Mateus are known as RP realms - and yet there's never been any insane people saying you can't chat OOC around RP areas. GW2, no one says anything. No one even said stuff back in ye olden days of Everquest. Genuinely, what is wrong with WoW roleplayers?

a lot. a lot is wrong with wow roleplayers lmao.

[twistedtango]

Looking For Roleplay - Dacien Pasdevillet

The Basics ––– –

Age: 237

Race: Veena Viera

Gender: Male

Sexuality: Gay

Marital Status: Single

Server: Balmung - Crystal

Physical Appearance ––– –

Hair: Jet black and straight. Fine, and very well kept. The only real signs of the Viera's old age are the grey strands that he has proudly kept visible.

Eyes: His most distinguishing feature, Dacien's eyes are a bright, haunting red. They have an eerie quality to them. Enchanting, intoxicating. One might even swear they were glowing, by how boldly their hue stands out against his otherwise muted colors.

Height: 6'2"

Build: 182 lbs. Lean muscle. Most of Dacien's muscle is centered around his shoulders and back, though he is relatively slim all things considered.

Personal ––– –

Profession: Dacien makes no secret of his occupation. He serves openly as the loyal butler of House Pasdevillet, and beyond that as a man pursuing his own interests. Currently, the only thing Dacien seems to be vague about is how he maintains his position as a butler while outside of the bounds of Coerthas, often leaving it at 'personal duties' and dodging further questions.

Hobbies: Reading, cooking, cleaning. Dacien's hobbies lean towards the domestic, as his joy and comfort comes from tending to the space or people around him.

Residence: Pasdevillet Manor, Ishgard.

Birthplace: ???

Fears: Betrayal. Not that Dacien fears being betrayed, but rather that he fears one day that his nature will cause him to betray those dearest to him in an act of blind frenzy. Beyond that, he isn't terribly fond of geese.

Relationships ––– -

Spouse: Unmarried.

Children: None of his own.

Parents: Dacien's parents are both deceased.

Siblings: If Dacien has siblings, he does not know of them.

Other Relatives: Dacien is not sure of what tribe he hails from exactly and, therefore, doesn't know the fate of them or anyone he might share blood with.

Traits ––– -

Extroverted / In Between / Introverted Disorganized / In Between / Organized Close Minded / In Between / Open Minded Calm / In Between / Anxious Disagreeable / In Between / Agreeable Cautious / In Between / Reckless Patient / In Between / Impatient Outspoken / In Between / Reserved Leader / In Between / Follower Empathetic / In Between / Apathetic Optimistic / In Between / Pessimistic Traditional / In Between / Modern Hard-working / In Between / Lazy Cultured / In Between / Uncultured Loyal / In Between / Disloyal Faithful / In Between / Unfaithful

Additional information ––– –

Themes and More: It is important to me to make sure that everyone involved in any RP I’m a part of is comfortable and having fun. To that end, I want to be transparent about the themes that I explore/am willing to explore, and what I would like to avoid. I see the typical D/M/E RP specifications in most people’s search info, and I am open to all such themes with proper communication. However, I reserve the right to change my mind.

What I’m Looking For: I’m hoping to broaden my horizons as a roleplayer by roleplaying with many different people and experiencing new and interesting situations! I am always open to making friends and discussing potential plot ideas. I appreciate many different themes, but I would lying if I said I didn’t have a preference. While I can enjoy comedic and lighthearted stories, I find I am only ever truly invested in those with emotional weight, nuance, and depth. I prefer dark and/or romantic themes, but not so much in that I crave constant edge and agony or only erotic entanglements. Balance, y’know? Most of all, I have a story for Dacien that I wish to see unfold, and I want to welcome others to join me in telling that story - and I want to explore your story(s) too!

RP Hooks ––– –

Story Hooks: ◈ The Loyal Butler - Dacien was a well kept open-secret in the Pasdevillet family. Never truly hidden, his presence was kept to within the House's estate and rarely did he leave the confides of those walls for any reason. While this was ultimately for his own protection, as the Ishgardian people had reason to distrust his foreign presence, it was unavoidable that there would be times that Dacien would need to leave the boundaries of his home - be it to for reasons of business or pleasure. These times often came in the dead of night, when Dacien would sneak away to get a breath of fresh air, to indulge in some star gazing, or to make his way out of Ishgard entirely to fetch some foreign goods. Maybe your character, if they are Ishgardian, heard rumors about House Pasdevillet's 'pet'. Or perhaps they caught a glimpse of him during one of his nights out. Alternatively, maybe your character crossed paths with Dacien while he was journeying elsewhere to fetch things for his House. ◈ The Loyal Beast - Life for Dacien after his stint as House Pasdevillet's most loyal servant has proven to be uneventful. The transition from fulltime caretaker to independent man has left Dacien with idle hands, and so he has sought tirelessly for ways to keep them busy lest they fall puppet to devils. One of the ways in which Dacien has found himself passing the time is tracking down slavers and human traffickers, attempting to bring an end to their black market dealings and bring justice to the people they sell and trade like cattle. The path he follows is one steeped in crimson, bloody and tireless as his trail always seems to lead to operations bigger than he originally imagined. If your character has history with slavers, is a mercenary who would have taken a job to help fight and kill slavers, or could have heard idle gossip about such rumblings, then this avenue may have more meat to it!

Contact Information/About the player ––– –

Hello, and thank you for reading this far! My name is Blake, 25, nonbinary they/them, and you can usually find/contact me right here on tumblr! I keep a bit of an odd, migrating schedule, but I am always happy to make room for some RP whenever we can make it work!

[nightshadeserkhet]

Nightshade, the Songstress

Name: Serkhet Dei-ilja

Alias: Nightshade

Age: Est. 100 years. [Unknown]

Height: 6 fulms

Weight: 165 ponze

Occupation: Entertainer at The Viper’s Nest in Idyllshire | Pleasure Maiden 

Skills: Song | Dance | Archery | Alchemy | Botany | Pleasure

Info: A rare bloom with mysterious Golmorran origins, the Nightshade can be found in an entertainment venue hidden deep in the colony of Idyllshire. A whispered secret yet favorite among travelers to the colony for its quieter pleasures, the Viper’s Nest is a respite spot for weary adventurers seeking food, drink, and warm company. Inside is found all manners of exotic tastes, from imported foods and drinks to the finest of embraces that Dravania has to offer. As a wayward spot for lost souls, the Nightshade is one of many ladies that flee their former oppressive homes to find freedom in the ruins of a great Sharlayan civilization.  Who is she? Where is she from? These are answers to a question that she, herself, doesn’t know she’s asking. With the broadened horizon of adventures before her - perhaps she may find these answers in the company that she keeps and the tasks of life that will be given to her. OOC: This character is [M] for 21+ roleplayers on the FFXIV Balmung server in the Crystal Data Center! Walk-ups, /tells, and active open world RP is more than welcomed! Please don’t be afraid to poke at my Rava bun and introduce yourself! Pop-up Interactions are strictly IC, and mature themes will be explored at the discretion of both parties interacting with each other. If you’re not comfortable, neither am I! Boundaries are to be respected, and Serkhet has the right to say no to any interaction that isn’t going favorably. 

That being said, difficult themes are a possibility so long as there’s contribution to character development. She is only known as ‘Nightshade’ publicly. Please do not use Serkhet’s real name until it is specifically shared in the IC. She is willing to Data Center travel and world travel for interaction and company! 

Hours of availability: Monday-Thurs, 9PM EST+ . I am a night-owl so I tend to keep late hours and beyond. Specific dates are most favored. Serkhet will be active in the IC 2-3x a week at the very least, and scheduled dates will be cherished over random pop-up RP! 

Any gil exchange is welcomed as tips only - I will never charge OOC gil for time spent with Serkhet! Contact info: Walk up and drop a post if Serkhet is in public settings and has her RP tag on! OR! Poke me in-game or leave a post/question on this Tumblr for initial contact. If we mesh, Discord will be provided! Thank you for reading!

[zell-bell]

An older, but still beloved commission of Zell by the wonderful Eliza Stark Art on Instagram.

[mooglemeet]

Hello! I'm so sorry if I missed this in your FAQ or FAQ tag, but I was wondering if you promote venues! The particular venue is also an FC, but the advertisement itself would be more geared towards venue activity.

I do! Venues go under the catch-all #events tag and are then normally sorted by data centre and server (for example, this is the Crystal and Balmung tag, specifically). It's also not a big deal if the event is tied to an FC or not — I'll oftentimes just give it the additional #FREE COMPANY; (server) tag so people can see it at a glance if they're shopping around for new free companies.

Honestly, it's generally safe to assume I'll reblog most community events in XIV these days, save for the obvious OOC/Clubbing scenes. Art parties tend to be welcoming/friendly to roleplayers even if it's not always a direct focus, but the OOC Clubs tend to be just that: places where people can hang out OOC. There's nothing wrong with them! But they're not rp friendly and drift away from the original focus of this blog.

[gatheredfates]

Get ready for a hauntingly good time this SATURDAY 4th November at 8pm AEDT as the Fireside celebrates All Saints Wake! US/EU players can see the event in their time zone at a glance here OR by joining our discord.

WHAT IS THE FIRESIDE? Once a humble coffee shop nestled in the heart of a great free company, The Fireside was the go-to place for members of Firelight Trading Company looking for a bite to eat after a long mission. Realising its potential as both a meeting place and a means of capital, its proprietor expanded the business throughout the various city-states of Eorzea until The Fireside became synonymous with coffee, company and great food; sourly needed after the anguish of The Final Days. Now, patrons old and new can gather to enjoy the hospitality and cosy atmosphere these avenues provide. This establishment was made to focus on the creation and fostering of late-night/oceanic roleplay in the Final Fantasy XIV community. Though physically located in Balmung/Crystal’s Shirogane, the Fireside’s expansion into almost all the city-states creates a space where your character can walk in from almost anywhere, and our focus on a coffee-shop with a laid-back atmosphere encourages off-the-cuff, casual roleplay. "I'm not a late night roleplayer," you claim! You're still welcome to join our discord and hang with some night-owls or forward this on to any of your oceanic/insomniac friends. We'd appreciate it!

Tags for visibility! @mooglemeet

[xivanxiety]

I don't belong in this club (Approx. Sept 2020-Feb 2021)

That song is a bop, and a mood. Also the kid with curly hair and glasses looks almost identical to one of my nephews.

I was first introduced to clubs when one evening, some friends and I were hanging outside their FC house when we noticed this guy driving around their ward. Eventually, he noticed us, hopped off of his mount and approached our group. He asked us if we were waiting for the club to open. We had no idea what he was talking about. He said that his friend told him there was a club in this ward. We knew of no such thing, because if there was a club in their ward, they'd know, they've been in this ward since it first opened.

We were bored so we decided to help this guy find this mystery club of his. We learned that it was in this ward... just on a different server. We went as far as to escort this guy to the club, and upon arriving, we decided to head in as well. It was an odd and fun first experience, I will admit. They had a link to an actual DJ who was streaming for the club, not just someone who was streaming a playlist. Honestly, the DJ is who kept drawing us back to clubs. Wherever this DJ was, we went. However, I quickly learned that clubs weren't as innocent and fun as they seemed.

I first made the mistake of walking into a club on my own one evening. I shit you not, I probably received about 8 tells within five minutes. I couldn't stay still anywhere without someone approaching me. I just wanted to support the DJ! I ended up booking it and headed outside. One of these individuals who DM'd me even followed me outside and continued to pester me, asking if I was looking for company. I just teleported away and went back to Balmung. And from that point on, I did not enter a club alone.

Eventually, my shitty RP partner returned to the game and dragged me even further into this scene in the XIV community, under the guise that he was introducing me to fellow roleplayers. I was invited to a Discord server that I'll call The Prima Donnas. They all owned a club or worked for a club. Individually, they were alright people. I'm not here to shit on them, however, as a collective, they turned out to be a very toxic group, and I've been quite frank with a number of these people as they've reached out to me. Throughout my whole time with this friend group, I was always the outsider, and I think a few of them knew that, they knew I was different from them. But I think that is what some of them admired about me. Despite how shitty my RP partner was and his ever-increasing reputation, I was quite likable.

Eventually, I found myself joing the Discord servers for about half a dozen clubs or so, the clubs my RP partner worked for and then the clubs that this group was associated with. I was quite well known for my gposing skills and for how pretty my character was. I could get into clubs before they opened, I was given VIP status just because I was me, it got to a point where people would greet me at almost any venue I went to just because they knew of me. The Prima Donnas often encouraged me to sell myself off at auction events because they knew my character would get some pretty high bids. I knew that I didn't need to offer NSFW services to enter an auction, but generally, that was what people expected from such events, so I never gave it a shot. I also wasn't too sure I wanted get in close proximity of a person who would pay gil for my time. The irony.

The community definitely didn't give me the best of vibes. Some of the people in The Prima Donnas were constantly involved in drama and also displayed catty nature. Some of them would look at people's screenshots and talk about how vain those individuals were for only taking screenshots of their own characters. I couldn't help but wonder, was this how they spoke about me when I wasn't around? I was pretty well known for my shots, and I too only took shots of my character. I brushed it off as jealousy. Besides, we're not obligated to offer our skills as a service.

However, one day, a guy approached me asking if he could commission me for some screenshots as he'd seen my work before and he was looking to update his carrd. I wasn't terribly familiar with him, he'd been around while I was hanging out with groups of people, but I'd never had a conversation with him or spoke to him one on one. But I enthusiastically agreed. I'll note, he was paying me in gil. Not actual cash. So the scheduled day rolled around and I got into a voice chat with the guy while I was working on his shots. Eventually, he struck up a conversation that had absolutely nothing to do with what we were doing. For context, my closest friend at this time was a guy named Angeal. Angeal was another popular member of the community, also known for his screenshots, and we were two peas. We weren't more than friends, but it seemed like a lot of people thought we were at the time. So at some point, the guy started talking "I could have sworn that you and Angeal were dating." He then went on to explain that he was at a beach party the night before and he saw Angeal acting pretty flirty with this one girl, and that at some point, Angeal left the party with said girl. Again, I was failing to understand why he was bringing this up, but it'd later make sense. I informed him that we were just friends, besides, Angeal was poly. After that gpose session, this guy made a few weak attempts at hanging out with me. He was in all of the same servers as me, but he'd always ask me if I could come and hang out with him in voice alone. I always refused, because again, it's not like I was close to him. He was barely a friend.

Some weeks pass by and some random person approaches Angeal and I. They knew neither one of us at all, however, they felt they needed to share some information with us. The guy who had commissioned me for screenshots had drunkenly confessed to approaching me for a commission because he'd been admiring me from afar for some time and wanted an excuse to get close to me and sabotage the relationship that Angeal and I were supposedly in. He was under the belief that we actually were dating, and had hoped by telling me this story about Angeal, that it would lead to a break up, thus allowing him to swoop in and steal me from Angeal. I was stunned. We'd never had a single conversation before the day he approached me for the commission. He was barely in my radar. He knew jack shit about me, nor Angeal. For all he may have known, Angeal and I could have been a couple IRL living together. And this guy, who'd never spoken to me at all, had the audacity to try and break up my supposed relationship for a chance? For a girl he didn't even know??? Do you have any idea how fucked up that is??? I felt so violated. Knowing that for a time, someone was watching me from within the figurative crowd, plotting to end bonds for their own selfish gain with zero regards to my feelings and my life. Angeal was just as disturbed and reported him to the club they both worked at. The guy was fired and banned from a few servers.

Things continued to go downhill from there. At this point, I was done with Tyler (my ex RP partner) and The Prima Donnas were becoming nothing but a source of stress. Angeal had approached me with interest in getting into RP. However, he was starting to behave increasingly flakey with me. Every time we made plans to RP, he'd stand me up, forget, or cancel on me. We were once attached at the hip, but he was beginning to sound more annoyed by my existence. Meanwhile, he was clearly starting to latch onto another girl in the group, Honey. And instead of talking to me and being honest, he instead told the group that I was pressuring him to RP with me (I'd ask him maybe once every two weeks). I caught word of this from another person in the group, which prompted me to approach Angeal, telling him that if he has an issue with me, he comes to me, it's not fair for him to vent to mutual friends. It makes me look bad, may turn the group against me, and not to mention, he was exaggerating the situation and making a whole lot of something out of nothing. Things didn't get better. Angeal didn't get along with one of the other girls in the server, Sunny. I'll admit, Sunny had her faults, she put too much pressure on the friend group, often relying on us for emotional support in ways many felt pushed their boundaries. But she also just straight up didn't like Angeal and would pick fights with him. Then there was Bunny, who was envious of all of us girls and the amount of attention we received. She was unhappy with her own RP partnership and her lack of success regarding her work at clubs. I vented to her about Angeal's changing attitude toward me, which she tried to ride off of claiming that he wasn't talking to her or hanging out with her either. Girl, you weren't even his best friend, RP partner, or romantic partner, stop making this about you. Bunny, being the same race/clan as me even once tried to see if she could get Tyler to go after her purely to spite her RP partner, but for some reason he never took the bait. Though, Honey and Tyler had ERP'd a number of times, so Honey was beginning to lose my respect. Her IRL husband played the game, but she was spending more time E/RPing with other men than spending time with him. I once listened in on him and her ex RP partner talking about how they were concerned about her, especially since she began hanging out with Angeal more. Her husband claimed she wasn't spending a whole lot of time with him or outside the game. She was up until the wee hours of the morning with Angeal.

My anxiety around Discord began to increase once more. I had to set myself to DND, Sunny and Bunny were both constantly DMing with their woes and gripes regarding the group and their own personal problems. There was a whole lot of drama that didn't involve me erupting as well. Clubs closing, club competition, people claiming they were quitting the game, I'd call their bluff, they'd snap back at me (all of these people still play, btw). I gave zero fucks at this point.

Eventually, I noticed the server just... died. People were still posting in the channels, however, the voice chats were empty except for Sunny who was waiting for people to show up. I was heading home from work one evening when Sunny sent me a screenshot of someone's Discord, it was Bunny's now ex RP partner, Chad, who also ran the Discord server. He'd briefly posted a screenshot of his screen in one of the channels only to immediately remove it. But not fast enough! Sunny snatched it right up. And in that screenshot you could see his Discord window, and in it was a private voice chat in the server called 'Sneakret Club' and in the voice chat was everyone but me and Sunny.

They must've known what Sunny was going to do because I had people, including Angeal, flooding my DMs defending themselves and trying to explain things. I was not kind to them. I wasn't the least bit surprised. What I haven't mention was that this wasn't the first time they did this. A bit back they were planning a map run, and there was one member in the server who they knew wouldn't agree with their drop rules, so instead of saying something as simple as "These are the rules, if you don't like it, well then, it's probably best to not tag along," they created a secret voice chat where they invited everyone except for that one individual. I voiced how ridiculous I thought it was that they felt the need to go about the steps of making a secret voice chat when they could simply tell them the rules. I doubt it'd hurt their feelings or upset them. This individual wasn't exactly sensitive. I also told them that if they found out, it could do more harm than had they just been honest up front. So, I reminded them of that instance, and what I told them. They ruined my trust. From that moment on, I would wonder, any time chat was dead... were they avoiding me? What were they saying behind my back? Because I knew what this was about. Angeal's tone then shifted and said that he is entitled to a safe space. Safe space from what?? I once again learned that he'd been talking shit about me again, claiming I was being clingy. I wasn't, he just wanted to spend all of his time with Honey and no one else.

Not a single person tried to get my side of his story. Not Chad, not Honey, not Bunny. They all happily went along with it until I found out. And so, if by some freak chance one of the people from this group is reading this and wondered why I left and distanced myself from all of you, this is why. Not a single person save for Sunny was a true friend. Honey continuously ERP'd with my RP partner fully knowing my frustrations. She could've been a homie and turned him down and told him to go write with his RP partner for once. Angeal lied about me to our mutual friends and threw me under the bus, and Bunny, fully knowing my frustrations and anxiety, selfishly went along with it because she just wanted to be one of the cool kids and was probably happy to learn that she'd made it into the 'sneakret club'.

This amongst many things put me off of the club scene entirely. Never ask me to go to a club with you.

Other Reasons Why

You know that individual I mentioned who followed me outside the club? Yeah well, that person would continue to follow me every time they saw me at a club, even if I was with other people. This went on for months.

There was also simply just too much catty behavior. A friend of mine had a gf who did not like me, she was convinced I was after her man despite us not being on speaking terms (she turned him against me for a period of time). And any time I posted a screenshot on any mutual server, she'd spam screenshots to bump mine away. He confirmed that she was indeed doing it on purpose.

There was a girl who was envious of me and it was really awkward. She had once upon a time been close friends with Angeal, and he was no longer interested in being friends and was trying to gradually distance from her. Looking back, he was probably doing to her what he did to me, however, girly was not taking the hint, so in some ways I did her a favor. Anyway, Angeal submitted himself to an auction. However, this same girl was winning the bid for him. All of the Prima Donnas put together a pool of gil for me to bid on him. I won the auction. Afterward, she started sending me tells informing me that she really wanted to win the auction. She was really hoping she'd be the one to win, and she'd have won if it wasn't for me. She just wanted some time with her friend as she hadn't gotten a chance to hang out with him in a long time. I simply told her "You shouldn't have to pay for your friend's time. If he wanted to hang out with you, he would." She then started DMing me on Discord badgering me with questions, asking stuff like "Are you two dating???" and just being all around nosy. I reported her to the people running the auction and they had a talk with her. Coincidentally, she soon fantasia'd her character to look suspiciously similar to mine. Same hair color, same eye color, same hair style, and freckles.

Meanwhile, Angeal had another girl hung up over him. He said he made the mistake of ERPing with her one time and ever since she'd follow him around to clubs. He said he knew she'd be especially jealous of me because our characters were of the same race and we had the same face and hair color, but were different clans. Sure enough, the next time we were in a club together, she spotted him talking to me and slipped into his DMs stating that she noticed that he replaced her with a less attractive version of her. She asked him not to forget about her. From that point on, this girl made it her personal goal to steal the attention of anyone I was speaking to. One friend stated that she'd sent them a tell "She's cute, but I'm cuter ;)" and another said that she was willing to let him and our other friend treat her like a spit roast. This girl had quite the following on social media, and it's funny that so many people adore her but I know how disgusting and petty she can be in private.

I had an acquaintance who ran a rather popular club. He often extended invites to his club which also operated as an FC. I told him I wasn't keen on the club scene anymore, so I was hesitant to get involved. He told me I didn't need to interact with the club side of things, they had channels specifically for just the FC. My internal logic was thinking "Yes, but where do you find your members? Your club" He said I could join the server as a member with little commitment, he just wanted to provide me a community to be a part of since he noticed I was running around without an FC. He told me they have zero drama tolerance and will not hesitate to remove people causing a problem, and to just let him know if anyone was causing trouble. Within minutes of posting a screenshot of my character in their screenshot channel, a guy slipped into my DMs and started trying to flirt with me, his first statement being that my character was cute, he then asked if I wanted to hang out in-game sometime because he wouldn't mind getting to know me better. His character looked like an absolute fuckboi. I DM'd my friend, who was also the leader of the FC, and told him that someone had already slipped into my DMs. I looked him up on Discord and saw that he'd just joined the FC that day. My friend responded stating that he encouraged guys to shoot their shot, and basically defended the guy, stating that he probably just genuinely wanted to get to know me. Bruh. This isn't a dating app!

Then much later on, about mid 2022, long after I'd left the club scene, I started RPing with this one guy. He brought me to the venue he worked at which was an adventurer's guild. After the venue closed, he and his friends were going to go venue hopping and invited me to tag along. I was fine with this as long as it wasn't a club, and he knew this, I was adamant. No clubs. Eventually, the group brought us to a club. I tried to be understanding. It was a completely different DC so maybe it wouldn't be so bad. Nope. It was the worst club I'd ever been to. People were openly ERPing on the dance floor. I sent him a tell informing him that I'd be leaving. My character would not canonically go to a club, much less one where people were fucking on the dance floor, so I couldn't be IC like everyone else was, and I was beginning to feel uncomfortable. He then logged out on the spot, didn't say a damn thing to me. I sent him a DM on Discord asking if he was okay, and he then informed me he no longer wished to RP with me because he did not like that I was shaming him for going to clubs. He then blocked me. That was the last time I went to a club.

[casualcatte]

Late-Night Roleplayers Wanted!

I’m typically active between 8pm and 8am Central (US), but I find that a lot of roleplay dissipates after midnight since people have jobs and school and stuff.  That said, I’d really love to find some folks that are part of that after-midnight crowd I have plenty of writers that I work with in prime-time, but very few in the late-night hours, so I’m looking to fill that lapse for myself. If you’re interested, full details about Gospel (and me) can be found at her carrd.

http://gospel-ffxiv.carrd.co