#baddest naughty cat

[turbulentphoneinmypurse0997]

This weeks Goodest Baby Pie Cat Of The Week and Baddest Naughty Cat Of The Anti-Week are…

Xerxes IX for bringing me precious stones after visiting and sitting on the royal throne bed for the first time!

And!!!

Xerxes IX for not staying to let me get a picture of him on the throne!!!

[oldhagtournament]

Propaganda under the cut

Boss Lady

(mod note) i choose a pic from the live action show but this counts as her from the manga too ok!!

ICONIC ICONIC!!! idk why not more people are talking about her

her husband died and now she has entered her flop era. you bet your ass she is the baddest bitch at the grocery checkout tho!!

for the live action series: in the show her husband is still alive - hes just broke so we get grocery store arc anyways! everyone needs to watch him doing back up for her at karaoke please theyre so iconic

Baba Jaga

She is a witch, she is literally THE hag. She can do both! One time she is a repulsive and ferocious old woman who fries and eats children, and in other times she is a nice old woman, who helps out the hero.

She has a house, a moving house that walks on chicken legs! She lives the cottage dream and is free roaming in the wilderness and forests.

she is THE grumpy/sassy old lady. she lives in a chicken leg house and flies around in a mortar and pestle. she eats naughty kids. og old hag

She's the Ultimate Old Hag. She's got it all - a cat, a flying mortar, a hut standing on a chicken leg deep in the forest. She's got the old hag swag. If you give her a visit she might help you but she might also eat you.

[campingbagandstuff]

.22/9.33 {Part 2 of 12}; 17

Triggers/ foreword: loud, most ethnic, language, partial nudity, Video lyrics jourden coulda been, tierra whack 27 club, doechii pacer, NewJeans (뉴진스) 'New Jeans', ASAP, Lily Allen | LDN, björk ft. rosalía : oral, madison beer, sabrina carpenter, dove cameron, [inuyasha]=> do as infinity, Clio faces, Sandy Marton camel by camel, merry merry christmas and a happy new year, Rammstein engel, du hast, ich will, Lipps Inc funkytown N-dubz {papa, wouldn’t you, better not waste my time, best behaviour}, Ayumi Hamasaki {real me, surreal, appears, fairyland, bluebird, ourselves, microphone, november, [moon returns], sending meil, like a doll, lelio, rainbow, rule, my name’s women, is this love? Song 4 u, ladies’ night, about you, nextlevel, dearest, game, mirrorcle world, heaven, inspire, do it again, I dreamed a dream, step you, everlasting dream, WE WISH, free & easy, heartplace, HANABI, taskinillusion, dolls, voyage, close to you, bold & delicious, unite …{line 16}

Samurai Champloo shiki no uta, {Yoko Kanno}Origa rise, inner universe [(fatty bean)], Goldie inner city life, M-flo come again, After School first love, Koda Kumi run, candy, 2PM hands up, tatu gomenasai, eminem never enough, lose yourself, prince 1999, deadmau5 & Kaskade I remember, Donna Summer hot stuff,

Seyi Shey irawo, murda, Psquare, Flavour, Nato C, Wizkid, Justine Skye, Leona Lewis summertime, collide, I see you, Beyonce green light, formation, signs, pretty hurts, sweet dreams, single ladies, get me bodied, 7-11, ring the alarm, halo, flaws, countdown, run the world, if I were a boy, haunted, Yonce, upgrade U, diva, partition,crazy in love,check on it, dance for you, drunk in love, deja vu, naughty girl, Little Mix wings, woman like me, wasabi, shout out to my ex, sweet melody, salute, touch, (" ft. Stormzy) power, The Saturdays all fired up, hero, Brooke Candy FMU, nymph, paper or plastic, happy days, rubber band stacks, study in duality, michael buble, olly murs

Dorian Electra egdelord, f the world, Azealia Banks chasing time, 212, Anna Wintour, big big beat, harlem shake, atm jam, miss camaraderie, fierce, atlantis, cascada everytime we touch, heaven,

miss amour, count contessa, no problems, heavy metal & reflective, running, 1991, Kerli army of love, diamond hard, walking on air, feral hearts, Allie X prime, bitch, simon says, catch my breath, old habits die hard, it’s not so bad in LA, Miss A breathe, hauser, bastille

hush hush, bad girl, good ", touch,AoA bing bing, good luck,** 4Minute crazy, CL the baddest female,* hot issue, Jessi gucci, nunu nana, Hyuna how’s that, bubble pop, nabillera, Gfriend fingertip, Kara step it up, (anjulie brand new chick, you & I, Kool & the gang celebration)

mama mia, lion heart, Hitomi Shimatani perseus, garnet moon, papillon, Boards of Canada roygbiv, Bjork it’s in our hands, it’s oh so quiet, wanderlust, earth intruders, declare independence, innocence, hunter, hyperballad, mutual core, who is it, pluto, notget, union, I've seen it all, dull flame of desire, joga, unravel, pagan poetry bachelorette, alarm call all is full of love, nature is ancient, venus as a boy, hidden place, it's not up to you, aurora, it's in our hands, black lake, stonemilker, crystalline,lionsong, moon, triumph of a heart, hollow, mouth mantra, thunderbolt, cosmogony, anyone who had a heart, enjoy,(mika, hyuna bubble pop, red)

pagan poetry, where is the line, cocoon, oceania, play dead, army of me, big time sensuality, I miss you, possibly maybe, isobel, human behaviour, the mothers of invention freak out! the B-52's love shack,

Mondo Grosso labyrinth, *CL lifted, 2NE1 I hate you, I love you, come back home, I am the best, fire, can’t nobody, gotta be you, **AoA like a cat, wang chung dance hall days, everybody have fun tongiht, the temptations my girl

Hilary Duff coming clean, with love, fly, sparks, Dua Lipa we’re good, Sugarcubes birthday, Destiny’s Child survivor, lose my breath, soldier, Lily Allen smile, the fear, The Ting tings that’s not my name, eddie murphy party all the time, REM everybody hurts

[voltage-vixen]

‘Tis the Season for Smut Masterlist

This Masterlist features stories of holiday cheer & smut from the following fandoms:

Mr. Love: Queen’s Choice Voltage The Ikemen Series Obey Me! Mystic Messenger Love Unholyc

The respective author of each story is tagged accordingly next to their works, so be sure to go check out their blog if you’ve enjoyed their story(ies)! You can also view the full list of writers that participated This Masterlist will be updated overtime as more entries are published on tumblr as well. You can also view the entire list of content creators for this challenge HERE as well.

*Please be advised that all stories featured in this challenge contain NSFW content.

"Kiss me under the mistletoe.”

Voltage

Traditional Etiquette: Kei Soejima (Masquerade Kiss) @darkmindsotome

Kiss Me Under the Mistletoe: Taki Kozaki (Kings of Paradise) @pjzatken

Kiss Me Under the Mistletoe: Guy Avari (Court of Darkness) @voltage-vixen

The Ikemen Series

Kiss Me Under the Mistletoe: Lancelot Kingsley (Ikemen Revolution) @moos-cow

A Naughty Sleigh Ride 

Mr. Love: Queen’s Choice

A Sleighing Secret: Gavin @voltage-vixen

Mystic Messenger

A Naughty Sleigh Ride: 707/Saeyoung @voltagesmutter

"Who needs Santa when you have me?”

The Ikemen Series

“Who needs Santa when you have me?”: Jonah Clemence @moos-cow

Love Unholyc The Man in the Damn Red Suit: Sol @voltage-vixen

A kinky Secret Santa gift exchange.

Shall We Date?: Obey Me!

A Kinky Secret Santa Gift Exchange: Beezlebub @voltagesmutter

"All I want for Christmas is you.”

Voltage

All I Want for Christmas is You: Taki Kozaki (Kings of Paradise)  @voltage-vixen

The Ikemen Series

“All I want for Christmas is you.” Luke Clemence (Ikemen Revolution) @moos-cow

Mystic Messenger

“All I want for Christmas is you.”: Jumin Han @psychbitch

 "Why sit on Santa’s lap when you can sit on mine?”

Mr. Love: Queen’s Choice

“Why sit on Santa’s lap when you can sit on mine?”: Gavin @voltagesmutter

The Ikemen Series

“Why sit on Santa’s lap when you can sit on mine?”: Oliver Knight (Ikemen Revolution) @moos-cow

Mystic Messenger

Not Santa’s, But Mine: 707/Saeyoung @ramblings-of-a-hopeful-heart

 MC/LI wearing nothing but a Santa hat and a bow around their neck

The Ikemen Series

Wearing nothing but a Santa hat and a bow around their neck: Ray Blackwell (Ikemen Revolution) @moos-cow

Shall We Date?: Obey Me!

Operation Get Laid: Lucifer @voltage-vixen

"I’ll be sure to stock your stuffing.”

The Ikemen Series

“I’ll be sure to stock your stuffing.”: Edgar Bright (Ikemen Revolution) @moos-cow

“You’re the only gift I plan on unwrapping tonight.”

Mr. Love: Queen’s Choice

His & Her Gifts: Gavin @purple-cat-demon

The Ikemen Series

“You’re the only gift I plan on unwrapping tonight.”: Giles Christophe (Midnight Cinderella) @phantomlover04

“You’re the only gift I plan on unwrapping tonight.” Theodorus van Goh (Ikemen Vampire) @voltagesmutter

“Let’s do something that puts us on the naughty list.”

Voltage

Kiss Me, I’m Naughty: Eisuke Ichinomiya (Kissed by the Baddest Bidder) @lin-ful

“Let’s do something that puts us on the naughty list.”: Yamato Kougami (My Forged Wedding) @ramblings-of-a-hopeful-heart

Toys aren’t only for playtime

Shall We Date?: Obey Me!

“Toys aren’t only for playtime.”: Asmodeus @voltagesmutter

Wrapped up in ribbon/bondage

Shall We Date?: Obey Me!

Wrapped in ribbon/bondage: Diavolo @voltagesmutter

Nibbling on holiday treats

Mr. Love: Queen’s Choice

Christmas Nibbles: Victor @voltagesmutter

Voltage

Nibbling on Holiday Treats: Kyohei Rikudoh (Scandal in the Spotlight) @otomefoxystar

“You’ve been a very good boy/girl this year.”

Mystic Messenger

“You’ve been a very naughty girl this year.”: 707/Saeyoung @psychbitch

Voltage

“You’ve been a very good boy/girl this year.”: Taki Kozaki (Kings of Paradise) @voltagesmutter

[t4tu]

teacup

when they ask you what you're studying, you tell them you're considering art history when i know you've just got accepted into med school in oxford and as they pretend to admire your "adventurous decision", you send a wink my way and i'm so in love with you, i'd burn cities down in your name. 

the fancy dishes and expensive bottles keep coming as they talk finances and stock markets and sport cars and baseball and it should be boring but instead you make it a spectacle as you set the table on fire with your strong opinions and still somehow charm them all through it. you keep it classy and passionate. i wanna give you an ovation after we left, wanna worship you in the bedroom tonight. they ask me how i managed to find you and you say excuse me, who said it wasn't me who found him? and i feel the luckiest.

they get curious about you, but you keep giving me these reassuring smiles that will take me days to recover from and when one of them gets drunk enough to ask you what's your biggest weakness? you say i'm always unprepared for job interviews in the middle of dinner, biggest weakness for sure and he laughs and i can't get enough of you. 

when one of the girls starts bragging about her new fur coat you say with a small smile on your cheeks that it looks exactly like your cat and i laugh because you're this mixture of a mean angel and a kind devil and when she asks if your dress is gucci, you tell her you sewed it yourself and she can't believe it so you say yeah, ok, i confess, it was actually my cat, i can check if he's free to make you one too and she laughs because she doesn't understand and because your rip their egos so subtly if feels like affection and all i do is think of you.  

when the catholic couple invites you to church the next morning, i get distracted remembering the time you told me that the birds on the telephone line were your only religion and all i can hear is you saying you'd gladly help in the community kitchen. 

are we keeping him too much at work? they ask and you're too naughty not to tell a pretty lie so you say oh no, you're doing me a favor, honestly, take him away, please but you smile at me slowly and you're the baddest, a loaded gun with your superstar face and i always feel like you're deciding whether to spear my life and i couldn't love you more. 

when "the most expensive bourbon in england" arrives, you sip on it slowly and my lips are raw just from the thought of kissing you but you whisper in my ear that it tastes like poisoned tea on fire and i think you taste like whiskey on a teacup. 

your hand travels to my knee when the bill arrives and you tell me each one's amount on my ear as if it's a secret and when one of them says only boys now, dear and grabs the check you let them tire themselves with the math. no one notices the extra bottle of wine you sneaked in as a gift for the waiter and i don't think anyone would notice if we just sneaked out now because all i wanna do is to take you home and for love to make us and to wake up in your arms, still admiring, still fascinated by you. 

[queenofhartsxoarchived-blog]

AN IMPRACTICAL JOKERS MEME BECAUSE I FREAKIN’ LOVE THE SHOW

STARTERS

“LAAAAAAARRY!!!” “You’re my least favorite.” “Multiple asparagus! Asparagui!” “Hey, mustache, what’s up?” “I’m gonna die! I’m gonna die!” “Today is my birthday, today is my birthday.” “Who says I’m sober?” “Oh my God, is that Jaden Smith?” “Don’t call me mustache.” “Do you know what foolproof means?” “Do you go to the bathroom without annoucing that you have a foolproof plan?” “Larry! Larry! Larry!” “I don’t look like a ferret.” “Fresh, boom bap, imma touch it.” “I will never forgive you!” “Yell out your favorite scene from the Notebook!” “Now!” “Welllll…” “How come when I win I still lose?” “You clearly remember the Alamo, right?” “Don’t call me clown.” “Ba-boom!” “I’m like a pirate. Arrrrrrrrrr!” “Suck it!” “He’s been threating to kill me.” “Well, I’m the baddest girl in the whole wide world.” “I put my hand in your shirt, my hand in your shirt, I put my hand in your shirt.” “I got a foolproof plan.” “Let’s get sexy!” “Welcome to the Castle of White!” “Did you know you were really cute when you ate that?” Aww, you kept it?“ "I don’t wanna say anything but your mom’s a ‘b’ to the 'itch’. "By this time tomorrow, I’ll be dead.” “I mean, with most sincerity, go fuck yourself.” “Santiago sent me.” “Cranjis? Cranjis McBasketball?” “Hello… From the other side.” “I got your nose, bitch!” “Have you ever been intimiate with a stuffed animal?” “I think I need new best friends.” “I gotta make it rain on dem hoes.” “We’re in Miami, bitch.” “BINGO!” “I hate you, you bitch!” “Beyoncé got laryngitis.” “Get out of here, you freak.” “I’m the baddest boy in the whole wide world.” “Let me get a fry.” “C'mon! C'mon! C'mon!” “You know what a turkey baster is?” “Are you being naughty?” “Shut your goddamn face!” “You threw it at the wrong guy!” “Shut your face, grandma!” “My wife left me!” “Howdy, asshole.” “Rooty toot toot.” “I’m afraid of bees… boobies.” “My eyebrows look poppin’.” “OH…MY…GOOOD!” “What? Oh, hell no! Hold up. Huh? Oh, okay.” How do I get to third base?”

SEND A SYMBOL (ADD REVERSE FOR YOUR MUSE TO DO IT TO MINE; WHEREVER THEY APPLY)

🔫 - for my muse to shoots your muse with a water gun 😂 - for our muses laughing hysterically at something and falling down 👃 - for my muse to put their nose on my yours… (specify) 😳 - for my muse to drop their pants in front of yours 🙀 - for my muse to chase yours while wearing in a cat costume 😬 - for my muse to shout ‘trust fall!’ then fall backwards, trusting your muse to catch mine 😏 - for my muse to strip for your muse in various outfits (specify outfits) 😃 - for my muse to ask your muse to be their roommate 😲 - for my muse to throw water in your muse’s face ��� - for our muses to bump into each other at a grocery store 😡 - for my muse to steal a piece of food off your muse’s plate 🔴 - for my muse to point a laser at your muse 🚗 - for my muse to hit yours with a remote-controlled car 😝 - for my muse to dress up as a superhero 😑 - for my muse to flip yours off 🎈 - for my muse to clip a balloon on your muse’s… (specify) 😱 - for my muse to show your muse their newest tattoo

[rradcattt]

Our Fave Music to Get you Through Lockdown #3

As we go into #lockdown number three, we at Lazy Oaf HQ have compiled a list of all our fave music ATM to help you get your dancing shoes on.

how i’m feeling now - Charli XCX

Charli XCX’s fourth studio album “how i’m feeling now” is an ode to what it means to be a creative in lockdown. Conceived, created and released over the summer of 2020, it came as a breath of fresh air to fans of XCX’s music in what was becoming an increasingly overwhelming time. First announced to fans over a zoom call (I mean seriously, can it GET much more 2020 than that?) how i’m feeling now is an incredibly intimate piece of work, created solely with the tools she had available to her at the time and collaborating with her fans rather than other big name musicians. Dripping in her own style and signature synths, this album is sure to keep you feeling like the baddest version of yourself, even if you’ve been wearing the same pair of sweats for a week. 

Isolation - Kali Uchis 

Kali Uchis’ perfectly named album “Isolation”, although released in 2018..., is a beautiful mix of breezy groove and psychedelic. While you may have heard her music trending on Tiktok to aesthetic videos of pretty girls (if you haven’t heard After the Storm, where have you been?) Her music more importantly finds clever ways to lace politics into artwork with tracks such as Miami, where both herself and rapper BIA narrate from an immigrant's perspective of the American Dream. It’s silky vibe and longing undertones are perfect soundtracks to spending summer in your back garden sipping homemade martinis. 

Hot Pink - Doja Cat

Released in 2019 just before lockdown number 1, Doja Cat's album Hot Pink took the internet by storm with it’s catchy melodies and iconic explicits that became fan favourites for thirst trap instagram captions. You’ve probably seen at least someone bust out “the Say So dance” at some point over the year, becoming a viral sensation that got it played out over the radio for weeks, later followed by sister songs from the album Like That and Cyber Sex, along with a slightly more sensual Rules. If you’re looking for the perfect mix of feel good grooviness and not safe for work naughtiness, you’ll find it in Hot Pink.

Daisy 2.0 - Ashnikko / Miku Hatsune 

December release Daisy 2.0 is an incredible remix of Ashnikkos single Daisy.  Featuring Japanese avatar Hatsune Miku, the track presents the perfect balance between Ashnikkos punky bad bitch nature, and Miku’s hypnotic hyperpop essence. The song comes just before the release of Ashnikkos new mixtape Demi Devil, set to arrive mid February of this year. If you’re looking for your new “main character takes over the world” song, this is a fierce contender. Zip up your biggest platforms and put on your biggest falsies, Ashnikkos Daisy 2.0 is about to take you on the trip of a lifetime.

Nightmare Vacation - Rico Nasty 

Best described by Elly Watson of DIY, Rico Nasty’s Nightmare Vacation will “chew you up and spit you out, and you’ll love every minute of it”. Filled to the brim with attitude and empowerment, this album challenges the narrative of female rappers that has been created for them by the industry and pulls you in every wonderful direction it possibly can. From angry punk fuelled and emo rap inspired tracks like Smack a Bitch and Let it Out, to fun vibey hip hop and pop songs like Don’t Like Me and Loser, Rico Nasty will show you every inch of her artistic ability and make you feel like the coolest version of yourself you possibly can. Catchy lyrics filled with nostalgia will send you right back to your childhood (see if you can spot her mean girls reference) and make you want to rip out your old Juicy tracksuit and chunky sunglasses for sure, what better way to show up to your family zoom quiz right?

Follow our Lazy Oaf Lockdown playlist on spotify to hear more of our faves!!

[bakugouwu]

what would ur cats' personsonas be

Olive is very energetic and social, she is a real extrovert ! She is also mischievous and can be naughty too !! But she is still nice and sweet !! She baby and feral at the same time.

Snickers is the NAUGHTIEST. He is absolutely Feral. He can be mean sometimes :( but he is not bad ! He is very Weird and excentric ! He can get bossy too. Imagine a little kid who thinks that he is the boss of everyone. But he can also be very sweet at times :)

Frisky is shy and the sweetest kitty ever !! He is very Innocent. The baddest word he knows is dangit. He can be somewhat of a scaredy cat (hehe). He is so nice and loves ppl so much :) he loves making ppl happy !!

[foodsniffr]

https://store.foodsniffr.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/Bad-Cat-2019-Desk-Calendar.jpg On Sale Now: Bad Cat 2019 Desk Calendar-Calendars.com-Books & Gifts – $14.99 Bad Cat Desk Calendar Me-yowza! Meet the baddest cats around for a year of off-the-wall feline madness. Adapted from the #1 New York Times bestselling book, BAD CAT is the outrageously hilarious calendar with 1.5 million copies in print. Every day, a new naughty kitty: Cats distilling catnip mash. Cats singing Fleetwood Mac at karaoke. Cats poking holes in the punishment spray bottle. Now including Bad Cat Diet Secrets, OKbadkitty.com, Bad Cats in Show Business, Criminal Cats, and the guide to Bad Cat Early Warning Signs, like “Cat ashamed to be a cat” and “Cat sprays own best friend.” Desk Calendar 365 Day Calendar Jumbo Rectangle Grid Adhesive Binding 6” X 6 ” Observes Major Holidays About Workman Publishing Workman is a publisher of cookbooks, parenting/pregnancy guides, books on gardening, country living, and humor, as well as children’s books, gift books, fiction, and the top selling calendar line in the business. Located in the heart of New York’s Greenwich Village, in a converted printers’ building, our offices are high-energy and creative, filled with people who are passionate about what they do. https://is.gd/tsvKNP #FunnyCats

[turbulentphoneinmypurse0997]

This weeks edition of Goodest Baby Pie Cat and Baddest Naughty Cat are;

Spot for bringing me a glow bracelet to wear at a rave!

And Marshmallow for thiefing a bookmark from someone as a gift!

Also I’m sorry this edition took so long to get released. I’m not doing well at all tbh I’m trying so hard to get through a lot of mental health issues and traumas and I’m grieving a lot of things rn.

[turbulentphoneinmypurse0997]

Goodest Baby-Pie Cat of this week is; Guy Furry for making everyone pizza on the heater! Such a talented and amazing chef! 10/10 would eat at his restaurant forever if it was real

Baddest Naughty Cat of this anti-week is; Fred for thieving a seashell earring that someone lost!