#bad!!!! im exhausted and my brain is fried and im in pain and im sober stillllll

[straydogged]

im soooo overwhelmed and kind of had a breakdown c:

[kahayaya]

Aug 20th Keto Diet

I started my keto Diet on Aug 16th officially.

Weight at the time I would say 220 ibs.

Reason for doing Keto:

I wanted to challenge myself, to see if I can manage a diet and keep track of what i eat. I think being sober for a semester made me think I can also do this diet. 

side note, I made a promise to myself when Alex leaves, I would change something about myself that I think would be good for me. Physically this is one of them. I also want to try to talk to people more and be more comfortable around others. 

I want to lose weight. I think during my time in quarantine, I had a bad habits for my health. I would doordash everyday with a lot of food. Also since I stopped running, I didn't move around much. So I would sit in my bedroom just looking at videos and doing nothing. I think I gained 20 ibs since April. 

Particularly keto because I had one of my friends do it. He had success. And something I would have never expected from him to do during college. He goes to ASU, which is a party school. And you can’t drink beer. He managed to do keto while under all those circumstances. So I am inspired by him to challenge that. 

Also Daniel and Adi were gonna do it this semester. IDK if they are following through, but if they are good. If they are not, well I kind of expected that :p (BoJack syndrome)

Also since all classes are online, I will be home all the time. So I can just cook up a meal at home, then going to campus and meal prep. So the times when I cook will be at my disposal. 

So I think imma write my thoughts up to now from day to day, but I’ll try to recall my thoughts from Day 1 till now.

Day 1 Aug 16th:

Definitely missed eating foods and I understood the struggle of going on this diet. I remember I went with Daniel to wholefoods to grab groceries. He told me about this drink called zevia, Which is no calorie soda with a sweetener that doesn’t raise blood sugar. Did research and it turns out that the drink is very keto friendly. I think I ate tuna and eggs for that day.

Day 2 Aug 17th: 

So I was not feeling much this day, cuz the 16th was light. That day was the first time to actually attempt a full keto diet. I also ran that day. but I felt really tired and exhausted. I think it was my new shoes cuz last time I ran in them they were painful and made me exhausted. So I stopped by target to grab some groceries for keto and household stuff. That day I made tuna again and eggs. I also attempted to intermittent Fast that day. I decided to stick with a window between 1- 7pm. I ate some food toward like tuna and eggs again. Then towards the end of my window, I got hungry. I then realized I had no snacks, so i stopped by Safeway to grab pork rinds and macademia nuts. I ate those snacks right when I got home. So I wasn’t too devastated that I ate outside the window cuz I knew my body needed some kind of food. 

Day 3 Aug 18th:

First day of classes. I remember I had my 8 AM class and my body was really hungry. So i stuck it out and took a nap right after class. I woke up around 11:45 to cook for my next class. I made an omelette with avacado and bacon. I think I ate during class, cuz we didn’t need to have our camera on. Fast foward, I think I baked lemon chicken after my classea were done. It was an alright chicken. Not too bad but also not too good. I like the zesty taste. 

Day 4 Aug 19th: 

I think I weighed myself and I dropped to 211 ish pounds. I was quite surprise the amount lost, but this was due to all the water weight lose I think. I think during this time I started to get brain fog. My thoughts were a mist of sorts. Similar to the first time I took E and the after effects. This is also part of the keto and IF part, so this is normal to have this. If it last long, I will reconsider about the diet and IF. I also had a dream the night before that I ate some fries and I spit it out. That dream was wild cuz I was in a car ride and somehow we drove off a cliff and into a water. I somehow teleported to a hotel room with the same people in the car and thats when the fry incident happened. 

Day 5 Aug 20th:

So I had another weird dream where I was a pier similar to Santa Clara. It had like all the carnival stuff and it was night time. I then somehow got a mocha coffee. I drank it. Half way through the mocha, I realized the mocha had sugar and milk. I was like shit, I just broke my keto. I was sad and then I think I woke up. But other than that I made the same breakfast n stuff. I also noticed my appetite has been really small. I think I’m actually eating like 1000 calories a day. I don’t know if this is good, but Im defs eating a lot less calories. I weighed myself today and I was 208. So as of right now there is a steady weight lost. I know there will be some kind of plateau but Im trying to combine excercise and cardio. Can’t do cardio cuz its smokey outside from the wildfires. So I’ve been doing pushups and ab-rollout. I also ordered a dumbell with adjustable weights going up to 25 ibs. So this will be very useful for when I workout at home. As of right now, I got hungry and finished up my breakfast. So I will have to see how my meal will be by 7pm.

With that being said this is how my keto and IF is going. I think it’s going well. I think I will change this kind of diary to be a weekly, probs every Friday to track how my progress is going and any highlights of the week. Follow my journey to keto! Again this is a promise I made to myself to keep me moving in life!