#avasis adaar

[secretsfromwholecloth]

Dragon Age: Inquisition, day 7.

The banter with Dorian offering to draw diagrams for Blackwall is great. I love you to death, Blackwall, but mind your business. Unless you want those diagrams.

Is it just me, or are the shards in the Exalted Plains all tucked away in the most irritating possible places?

And being constantly pulled into combat by passing wolves is terribly annoying.

You know, I was trying to pull the party out of combat, but I will also accept Dorian taking out a bear by himself. Good job. Dorian.

Landing on Dragon Island and having Varric ask, “So what do we expect to find here?” is good comedy.

Sorry, Dorian, you can have your seaside picnic in a bit. Though do you really want to have an audience for that, much less Varric and Blackwall, of all people?

OK, level 16 party, Vinsomer, go!

Well, that took several tries, a lot of manual reviving, and swapping out Dorian’s staff and a couple of his spells because whoops, he was favoring electrical attacks and the Vinsomer is immune to electricity, but this game’s first fucking dragon has been slain! Sorry you couldn’t be here for it, Iron Bull. Another time.

Bianca. >:|

Avasis is really unhappy with his stepmom right now.

To Caer Oswin now, to bang out Cassandra’s quest.

Oh, Cassandra.

“We seekers are abominations, Cassandra.” No, that’s definitely not foreshadowing anything, whatever would give you that idea?

Ooh, the Temple of Dirthamen. I don’t think I visited last time, let’s see what we find.

Whoo, good demon-summoning fun. With dismembered body parts.

Is it time for Wicked Eyes and Wicked Hearts? I think it just might be.

Dorian is non-negotiable as the love interest, and Cassandra makes sense for the warrior—she’s the fanciest of the three, and we’re going to a fancy thing. Even if she hates every second. (There are arguments to be made for Iron Bull, too—you can’t have too many professional spies on your side at an Orlesian court function—but the party needs a proper tank, it already has a melee DPS in Avasis.) Vivienne is potentially useful because she’s familiar with the Orlesian court, and Solas is important for in-character Reasons. That’s too many mages. Who do I drop? Vivienne, I think. Cassandra/Dorian/Solas party go.

Wow. I knew Orlesians were super racist, but wow.

“What is Lady Pentaghast wearing?” A uniform that looks very nice on her, now shut your hole. It’s rather less flattering on Avasis, mind.

Yep, Josephine and her sister are still adorable. Hug option when?

Poor Cullen. The handling of him here still sits very poorly with me, especially in the absence of any option to even try to rescue him.

“It would be easier if people would stop talking to me. Other people. Not you.” Weh.

Solas. Solas, what is that hat you’re wearing? Pretty sure Josephine didn’t issue you that thing.

Aww, Dorian. Don’t worry, if your mother does materialize out of nowhere, she’ll have a very large and protective Vashoth to contend with.

Yay, I totally needed more Morriganing in my life! Yes! Definitely! This is not sarcasm!

“Is that the Inquisitor? He’s not very good-looking, is he? Poor man.” Your hole, random noblewoman, shut it. Avasis is gorgeous, thank you kindly. And the horns are dashing.

Nice villain monologue, Florianne. You do know what traditionally happens after the villain gives their monologue, right?

Commencing Operation Stab Florianne Real Good.

Nice, that was some good stabbing.

And it’s done, Briala and Gaspard are ruling. Enjoy the boost to your ambitions to become Divine, Leliana.

Oh god. Killing Florianne means having a cadaver synod with the remains, doesn’t it.

And I think Dorian’s approval is maxed, I didn’t get messages about the last couple of things he should’ve approved of. Avasis loves you too, Sparkler.

“For a time, I had a respite with the man I loved.” I’d dearly like to know who that is, because it sure as hell isn’t Daiwen and I doubt it was Loghain.

The Wicked Grace scene is very sweet. And a little sad to see Blackwall having fun with everyone when he’s going to do the thing very soon.

And more in the morning, it’s late.

[secretsfromwholecloth]

*cracks knuckles* Porting over my answers from Discord, with a shout-out to the folks who patiently sat through multiple walls of text while I hashed this out in real time, and assuming that none of these characters' canonical romances are a thing in these AUs because Reasons:

Alix Cousland goes for Nathaniel in DAA (of course), probably Anders in DA2 (by which point he's mostly shed the traits she found so annoying when they knew each other), and...is there a good fit for her in DAI? Blackwall would be great if their differing views of aristocracy weren't likely to cause problems, the otherwise compatible Josephine and Cassandra are off the table due to an orientation mismatch, and I don't think she'd have as much power in a relationship with Cullen as she'd like. She might still go for Cullen, though. Or Blackwall if she could talk him around, but I wonder.

Daiwen Mahariel might eventually go for Velanna in DAA, Merrill (an old friend who he fooled around with at least once pre-Blight) in DA2, and I don't think there are any good options for him in DAI—shems aren't his type, he's not a big BDSM guy, and Solas' comments on the Dalish would put him off even if we posit that the egg would be interested in a man.

Isaura Amell goes for her old buddy Anders in DAA and DA2 and Blackwall in DAI, both people who'll make a priority of keeping her safe. She was told all her life that the outside world was scary and bad, and then she stepped out the tower door into a Blight, so it was even kind of true.

Wenthelen Andras is getting on in years and doesn't have time for nonsense anymore, so she goes for Zevran in DAO, Anders in DA2, and Blackwall in DAI.

Taran Hawke is the charming one so often, he goes for Sigrun in DAA, Leliana in DAO, and Josephine in DAI, who'll be charming back.

Pavey Hawke goes for Zevran in DAO, possibly Velanna in DAA, and Blackwall or Sera in DAI, who would understand the anger she's carrying around.

Gabran Hawke goes for Leliana in DAO, Anders in DAA, and Dorian, Cassandra, or Josephine in DAI, who'll be happy to be flirty and romancey and make it clear they want him too.

Linniva Trevelyan goes for people who are understanding about her trauma-induced grimness: Leliana in DAO (or maybe Alistair if she can be convinced he's not a complete Templar at heart), Nathaniel or Sigrun in DAA, and Fenris or maybe Isabela in DA2.

Avasis Adaar wants people who can match his youthful enthusiasm: Zevran in DAO, Anders in DAA and perhaps DA2.

Anchoret Lavellan feels the most kinship with people who fight, especially but not exclusively fighting for something, which means Alistair or Zevran in DAO, Nathaniel or maybe Velanna if we squint (she's not telling me her orientation yet, so I don't know if I should be considering women) in DAA, and...hm, sure sounds like Anders or Fenris ought to be the DA2 pick.

Which DA2 and Inquisition companions would your Warden romance?

Which Origins and Inquisition companions would your Hawke romance?

Which Origins and DA2 companions would your Inquisitor romance?

[secretsfromwholecloth]

Dragon Age: Inquisition, day 8.

“Never underestimate the enmity of those for whom outrage is a sport.” Ahem. Yes.

Fine, I’ll talk to Blackwall. (I got started late today because I was avoiding this conversation. I have a lot of feelings about it, OK?)

Yeah, the dog story is definitely not a coded confession about the Callier massacre, right? Of course not, what could possibly have given me that idea?

“I may as well have tied the noose myself”. Yeah, this isn’t about the dog anymore. Never was. Good ol’ Blackwall, so convinced he’s The Real Murderer Here, to the exclusion of assigning anyone else the smallest bit of responsibility, that you have to be paying close attention to realize that he a. didn’t physically take his sword to anyone and b. didn’t come up with the idea himself. After all, if he blames himself, well, he can control himself. If he’s the only one who’s ever to blame for anything, then his new life as Blackwall makes up for it and makes everything OK.

Avasis can’t break your code without already knowing about your past, Blackwall, you’re not going to get the answers you want from him this way. As far as he’s concerned, you’re still the weird traumatized uncle he looks up to for doing more good with your life pre-Inquisition than he was, and he’s going to keep giving you those blithe “but you’re a great guy” answers that clearly drive you up the wall.

The platonic version of the goodbye note is still very sad.

“The Callier massacre of 9:37” Wow, that was even more recent than I thought.

Taking Sera, Dorian, and Cole to Val Royeaux, because this isn’t a combat mission. (I do have a storied history of Three Rogues And A Mage parties, but not in this game.)

And he’s done the thing.

I 100% get the impulse to scrap your entire identity and reinvent yourself as a completely different person because it feels like who you are is too laden with past evil to ever let you do better in the future. But...that’s not how any of this works. You can’t just skip to “I’m a new and better person now” without first reckoning with the actual, specific harm you did and dealing with that. It never stops haunting you that way. I would know.

One of the reasons I love the character so much is because he’s me if I were slightly less of a coward and managed to eventually apologize and make real amends for certain things. Eventually. After some prodding.

Operation Give Thom Rainier A Stern Talking-To, Platonic Version, go.

Thom. Thom. Do you really think Lord Inquisitor I Don’t Believe In Executing People has any interest whatsoever in your “I need to die for the sake of justice” talk? Come on now. You know Avasis better than that.

Cullen’s war table memo calling Callier a “staunch ally of Celene” lands a little differently in a timeline where Celene is dead and Gaspard is de jure emperor, now that I think about it. I can’t imagine Gaspard would make too many demands in exchange for having our man released.

Judgment time. I quite appreciate the “being miserable (or dead) isn’t what helps you make up for your past crimes, it’s what you do about it” speech that you give him with the “pack him off to the Wardens” option.

And it’s done, he’s been promised to the Wardens. Hey, Thom, you wanted to be a Warden so badly, here’s your chance. Say hi to Nate and Sigrun and Oghren for me, if they’re still around. And to Daiwen when he comes home. (What? If you don’t think I’m going to headcanon all my babies joining up for adventures and having a reasonably happy ending, you don’t know me very well.)

Solas, you’ve been a good and useful friend so far, but the credit-to-your-race talk is really not appreciated. If Avasis wanted to hear that sort of thing, he’d go back to Halamshiral.

And Vivienne’s quest has been picked up. Considering how little time she had for Avasis before this, it must’ve been hard for her to ask for his help. Unpleasant position indeed.

Bless you and your terrible taste in smutty literature, Cassandra.

Oh, Cullen. “Now I can put some distance between myself and everything that happened. It’s a start.” It is. Now keep going. You can do it, we believe in you.

Whew, finally got all the shards in the Exalted Plains. Some of those were absolute bastards.

Man, I’ve been missing out by not having Dorian and Sera in the party together.

And before the Exalted Plains drive me completely around the bend, I think it’s time to look in on the Emerald Graves.

Aww, Blackwall and Dorian apologizing to each other is sweet.

Hello, Fairbanks. So romantic!

And more in the morning, it’s late.

[secretsfromwholecloth]

Dragon Age: Inquisition, day 6.

Uh, sure, Bull, Avasis will hit you with a stick if that’s what you want.

Oh, Cole. And you know, usually when a quest has two equally appealing paths, I choose based on “which companion’s advice is my player character more likely to want to take?” But Solas and Varric are both major influences on Avasis, so that doesn’t help. (That said, I went with making him human last time, so maybe this time I’ll make him a spirit.)

See, Cullen is capable of tearing himself away from his work for more than five seconds. Avasis is contractually obligated to root for Dorian in any chess matches, though. You understand, Commander.

“Pack them off to the Wardens” is becoming a pattern in Avasis’ judgments—he just did exactly that with both Erimond and Ser Ruth, and Blackwall will be getting the same treatment once he does the thing.

And he hasn’t executed a single person all game. What started with a commitment to trying my level best to soften Leliana eventually took over his whole character, and the ramifications have been great fun to discover as I go.

And Dorian’s sex scene has happened. Aww, Dorian.

Finding and killing the last Venatori in Griffon Wing Keep took entirely too long, but it’s done now. Hello there, Rylen.

Oh, it’s Coracavus time already? Excellent, being able to access the whole of the Western Approach is kind of important.

And Servis has been recruited as a smuggler, continuing the whole Executions To Date: 0 streak so far.

I was all set to go for Spirit!Cole this time, as I mentioned above. But that path apparently involves pushing him to forgive that Templar’s hand in the death of his original, and you know how I get about forced forgiveness. Welp, Solas is Mr. Knows About Spirits Guy, and I went the other way last time, so let’s take his advice. Even if it hurts a little.

Well, that was less painful than it could’ve been. And Spirit!Cole Coleing it up all over Val Royeaux is very sweet.

...and I’ll be skipping the “ask Krem vaguely transphobic questions” part of the evening, if it’s all the same to everyone else.

Oh, Cullen.

Yep, that was definitely at least a lingering pat on the back, if not a hug. Good. I look forward to seeing the romantic version next time out.

Huh, herding really is easier from nugback. (What, you thought I’d have Avasis riding a horse when the Avvar War Nug is available? It’s so majestic!) Enjoy your new life, golden halla!

And more in the morning, it’s late.

[secretsfromwholecloth]

Dragon Age: Inquisition, day 14.

This is the second time in as many days that I had to throw myself off the side of something to reach a quest objective.

Whew, made it to the fortress. And once again, during the fight against the Hakkonites by the gate to get to the last trail marker, the rest of the party just stayed outside because Reasons, so as I said last time, boys, on me, this is not a sightseeing trip. (I did realize it was happening in and walk Dorian in after a few seconds, and Cole was nice enough to show up eventually, but Blackwall spent the whole battle loitering outside. Thanks, buddy. Nice tanking.)

Let’s do this. Cole remains squishier than I’d like him to be, even with a guard-on-hit dagger, but hopefully we can manage; Dorian and Blackwall are in excellent shape, as they had damn well better be after getting all the best gear for the whole game.

Whew, Gurd Harofsen has been taken down and I don’t need to panic about warmth anymore. Cole needed a revive at one point, and I went through a lot of healing potions, but not bad.

“Inquisitor.” “Inquisitor.”

Weh, Ameridan.

Trying to get back to the shrine to get the memory there may end up being what finally drives me completely around the bend.

...today on Brightie Misses Really Obvious Pathways Leading Out The Back Of Things. Which appears to be an ongoing series.

Having Cole along to give additional detail about the memories is quite nice, I’m glad I did it.

Hakkon time.

GET BACK HERE YOU HORRIBLE SCALY SO-AND-SO

Cole, you have a guard-on-hit dagger, please use it and rack up some guard so you don’t get quite so badly hurt quite so often.

Got him. Bastard.

Oh, hey, I didn’t get to judge the bear last time! Have fun, Cullen.

Oh, Dorian. Tevinter won’t know what hit it.

To the Deep Roads, then. Varric probably ought to come along for this one. Even if he hates the Deep Roads.

Aww, Valta and Renn are friends.

Just not a Bioware RPG without a Towers of Hanoi puzzle showing up, is it?

OK, we’ve gotten to the “glowing eyes staring at you from the inky void” part of the game. Nice and creepy.

It’s adorable to begin with that The Descent comes with its own baby war table, but it’s especially nice of it to focus on giving Cullen things to do, considering how the main one tends to go in the late game.

If my updates get scarce, just imagine me going “oh shit oh shit oh shit” through the whole rest of the DLC. It won’t be too far off the reality.

🎵The Bastion of the Pure, oh, the Bastion of the Pure, we will live and die together in the Bastion of the Pure🎵

Guardian time.

Oh shit.

Also, oh fuck.

...don’t tell me my shit’s crashed, I was doing well, I had it down to half health!

Though it’s a very good sign that I got it there so quickly. Hopefully things go as smoothly this time.

And it’s done. I had the worst time keeping Avasis upright (Varric was a lost cause after the first third of the battle) and had to switch to controlling Dorian to cast Revival and fight from range, which is much less annoying with an enemy like this.

You’re being creepy, Valta.

And now to start moving towards the endgame. First up, chasing Morrigan through the eluvian.

Yay, the whole creepy family is creepying.

A reckoning shall not be postponed indefinitely, eh, Flemeth?

Now that we’ve shown that Morrigan can be knocked from her perch of smugness, the next step is to see it done by someone besides Flemeth, who comes as a package deal with her and hardly counts.

And I think that’s a good place to break for tonight, I can go after the stretchy man in the morning.

[secretsfromwholecloth]

Dragon Age: Inquisition, day 13.

Aw, Grandin. But that spirit you’ve joined with clearly can’t be trusted to behave itself, not after what Avasis saw outside, so...sorry.

Really, Baron d’Amortisan. A bogfisher.

“Regardless, Zevran and I have our own battles to fight” Eeeeeeee. :D

It’s been pointed out to me that melee builds aren’t the only ones who can use guard-on-hit gear, so Dorian just got some new armor. I’ve got materials to kit out whoever ends up being the fourth person I take to see Corypheus (or indeed that thing at the end of The Descent), but that’s not for a while yet.

Man, Cullen and Samson are both carrying a lot of anger around. Avasis is almost reluctant to get between them. (Putting that kind of temptation in front of Cullen may not be the healthiest option for anyone, but it’s done now.)

Got that last shard. Which I think is the last one in the game. Go me.

OK, bringing Vivienne along may not have been the best idea, she’s being really judgy about Avvar mage-training methods considering what the Harrowing is like.

And I have now bagged the set of astrariums as well. It’s been a good run for set-bagging. Better than the last one, anyway.

Ah, that point in the late game where all the remaining war table operations either require Josephine or Leliana for best results or can outright only be done by them. Enjoy your resource-gathering missions, Cullen. We’ll talk again during The Descent, which I think gives you a little more to do.

“Sometimes I wonder if we really know what we mean by “gods.”” Ahem.

Trail marker time! More being terribly annoyed by it in the morning, it’s after midnight.

[secretsfromwholecloth]

Dragon Age: Inquisition, day 10.

OK, I think I’ve mostly figured out how the Emprise works, I’m making good progress. Finally.

I’m so glad we agree that freeing the Red Templars’ captives was a good thing to do, Cole.

“But not the sort one expects a woman like me to raise?” Literally no one said that, Morrigan.

All right, now that the Emprise is starting to reveal its secrets, let’s look in on Suledin Keep.

Shut up, Imshael. No one gives a crap about your “choice spirit” schtick.

Wait, why does his demonic form look like a pride demon when his MO is that of a desire demon? I have a sinking feeling that it’s because otherwise they would’ve had to come up with a masculine desire demon design.

That fight wasn’t too bad. And getting there through all those giants and Red Templars was certainly easier than last time.

Hello there, Baron Desjardins. You don’t mind if I just sit here and listen to you for a while, do you?

This is the real reward for clearing out the keep and defeating Imshael, right?

I think I have enough dawnstone now to kit Iron Bull out in as much bright pink gear as he wants.

That thing dragons do where they’re like, “suddenly, full guard!” in the middle of a battle is incredibly rude. The Highland Ravager was nearly as annoying to take down as the Vinsomer. Four tries. But it’s done now. Whew.

Oh Jesus fuck, there’s another one? Welp, back to camp to load up on healing potions and bees.

Remember, kids, the dragon can’t swat you or breathe on you if you stand under it and stab it in the crotch. Mostly. Unless it moves.

See, these scaly fuckers are so much nicer to fight when they don’t do the regenerating guard trick.

A third one? Wow, the Emprise really is dragon central. Let’s do this.

GET BACK HERE YOU OVERGROWN HORRID LITTLE—oh, it’s done. :D

Shards mopped up, dragons mopped up, I think I’m done with the Emprise for now. Excellent.

Am I supposed to feel bad for Carroll? Was I supposed to find him sweet, back in Origins? Because I remember him creeping on my female party members and have zero regrets about stabbing him.

I appear to be massively overleveled for the Abyssal High Dragon, now that I think about it. Let’s do this.

Ooh, yeah, that was nice. Have fun at Skyhold, Frederic. Someone please restrain Iron Bull. (Not like that.)

You know what, I’ve been avoiding Iron Bull’s quest. Let’s mop that fucker up.

So, who gets the free spot in the party? A second warrior, to make sure I have a tank? Yeah, why not, having Cassandra along should be great fun.

And it’s done. What was that you were saying about Tal-Vashoth, big guy?

Ooh, I can do Leliana’s quest now. I was starting to worry it was bugged.

Did I successfully soften her? I think I did. :D

Time to look in on the Hissing Wastes? Yeah, I think so.

And more in the morning, it’s late.

[secretsfromwholecloth]

Dragon Age: Inquisition, day 9.

Always fun to watch a great bear go flying off the side of a hill during a fight.

And all the shards in the Emerald Graves have been gotten. At this rate, I may actually see the inside of Solasan one day.

Eat pointy death, Maliphant.

Oh shit, is it giant-slaying time? Two giants and a Red Templar Behemoth? Oh shit.

Chateau d’Onterre took entirely too long thanks to me misunderstanding where to look for the balcony key, but it’s done. Hey, I completely missed it last time, this is an improvement!

Time to take a crack at a second dragon, I think. Level 19 party, Greater Mistral, go.

That took a little patience, but what a difference from the fight against the Vinsomer. I still have potions left! And jars of bees! And no one needed reviving!

I was going to take another swing at the Fereldan Frostback, now that I’ve got a proper dragon-slaying party, but...where’d it go? It breathed fire at the party a couple of times and flew off, and now I can’t find the damn thing. I came back to the Hinterlands to fight a dragon, dammit, not to pick herbs. Though the herbs won’t go to waste.

Oh, there it is! Hello there, dragon, please hold still so Avasis can stab you.

Whoo, this is getting addictive.

I know I managed to access the northeastern part of the Exalted Plains to do Vivienne and Cassandra’s quests last time, but I cannot for the life of me remember how. Someone please explain it to me like I’m five.

The Northern Hunter has been bagged with relative ease (level 19-20 party). I may actually get all the dragons this time.

And I think it’s time to look in on Emprise du Lion. Which will forever be known as Emprise du Fucking Cold, thanks to that one post. You know the one.

I didn’t remember Emprise du Lion involving quite this much mountaineering. That’d be because there’s a passage leading out the back of the Highgrove camp that I took entirely too long to see. Whoops. Anyway. the last two Warden artifacts have been found for Blackwall. I suppose it’ll make a nice conversation starter once you go join them, Thom.

And more in the morning, it’s late.

[secretsfromwholecloth]

Dragon Age: Inquisition, day 3.

Hello, Iron Bull. On the one hand, having someone else around who looks like him and has a similar cultural as well as professional background is one of the most reassuring things Avasis has experienced lately; on the other hand, his parents left the Qun for a reason and raised him with a rather negative view of it, and here he’s got, not just any Qunari believer, but a Ben-motherfucking-Hassrath signing up to join him. Complicated feelings.

And let’s mop up In Your Heart Shall Burn and get this over with.

Hello, Cole. <3

Goddammit, Samson.

Hey, it’s the stretchy man! Hi, stretchy man!

Haha, stretchy man gives stupid monologues instead of actually doing something about his predicament. See you later, stretchy man!

As I said last time, the “trudging through knee-deep snow and howling winds” sequence reminds me entirely too much of some of my commutes over the years.

Yes, I still smile at the chorale scene.

No, Solas’ convenient knowledge isn’t suspicious or foreshadowy at all!

Hello, Skyhold. :D

And now that the proclamation’s done, it’s time to pick this boy out some better clothes, because that beige thing? On him? Nope.

Really, Solas, so much effort for a simple conversation.

Well, Alexius has been conscripted to research magic. Hopefully no life choices end up being regretted.

Hello again, Pavey. I suppose this reconstruction will have to do. It’s less bad than the one I did of Taran last time, anyway.

Hey, let’s make her squirm with questions about Anders. :D

Oh, Paves, if only you could’ve met him back when there was “just an Anders”. Though frankly, I’m not sure how much you’d have liked him.

Oof, where is everyone? This initial stage where no one is standing at their regular posts yet does my head in.

Hey, Cassandra, leave Avasis’ dwarf dad alone!

And now it’s time for another episode of Let’s Tank Cassandra’s Approval, because this is going to happen every game unless I a) plan a run specifically around her and/or b) tear myself away from Varric.

Uh, Bull, one minute you’re telling Avasis he’s lucky his parents escaped the Qun and he grew up Tal-Vashoth and the next minute you’re saying Tal-Vashoth wanted to turn their backs on it all and live like savages, do please make up your mind before the kid gets sick of you and decides he’d rather go hang out with the mages.

Sure, let’s go look in on the Fallow Mire and have the crap annoyed out of us by undead.

...right, this is the one that needs Deft Hands, Fine Tools, *sigh*

And more annoyance (and a decision on what specialization to take) in the morning, it’s late.

[secretsfromwholecloth]

Dragon Age: Inquisition, day 2.

Just because the game specifies that the Fereldan Wardens have disappeared along with their Orlesian counterparts doesn’t mean I can’t cling to a headcanon that my favorites were conveniently out of the country that day and are perfectly fine. Varric mentioned Carver being in I forget what faraway place, and what remains of the Awakening crew (they’d be down to just Nathaniel, Oghren, and maybe Sigrun by now, wouldn’t they) is clearly off in the Free Marches doing Very Important Things That Will Keep Them Out Of Ferelden Until This Is Over and you can’t tell me otherwise.

Hello, Blackwall. I don’t have a cute girlfriend for you this time, but here’s a young man who’ll look up to you, at least until you do the thing. And then there’s Josephine.

Oh, you should all see the smile on my face right now.

Random thought: Thom Rainier was a reasonably good-looking man who bargained his attractiveness for safety, both his own from those who would hunt him and vulnerable others’ from him (can’t hurt someone who’s so put off by your presence they stay away on their own). I get it. I made the same bargain. I’d make it again.

Anyway, Avasis has known guys like this before, veteran soldiers who’ve got something in their past they’re being cagey about but are decent enough in the present, and been grateful enough for their presence when things get stressful. He’s still got a headache coming when Blackwall does the thing, though.

That said: Squirm, you liar. Squirm.

I hereby dub the party of Blackwall, Varric, and Solas Team Extravagant Lies.

Hunting cute animals is worse when you’re a melee class and have to kill them by hand.

Combat is slightly less dire now that I’m getting a feel for abilities that help with closing to melee range; Avasis is level 7 and already has two of them.

I don’t know why Cassandra’s revelation later on that Varric is an Andrastian believer, albeit not an especially pious one, came as such as a surprise to me the first time around—now that I pay attention, he’s been using Andrastian swears since his introduction in II.

Really, Fiona. Really.

Hello, Dorian. Meet your future boyfriend. The events of the near future should be quite the bonding experience.

Oh, Connor.

The thing about Blackwall’s lie about where he was during the Blight is that he could easily tell the truth, that he wasn’t a Warden yet and was still doing his thing in Orlais (this was five years before the Callier massacre). But he’s trying to answer for Gordon Blackwall so he doesn’t get caught out in case someone knew the man, and he doesn’t know that answer (“wanted to help, but was stopped at the border because Loghain felt like being difficult”).

Sera’s banter with Solas about how elvish words don’t have meaning or value: I’m sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of my inner linguist going SCREEEEEEEEEEE. I understand why she has the opinion she does, but I’m contractually obligated to put her on my shit list for that one.

Avasis would like to note that of course Sera’s all up on human society, she can pass for one of them by wearing a hat.

Sera and Blackwall teaming up to annoy Solas is adorable.

I have officially bagged the set of all 22 shards in the Hinterlands. :D

Oh, fine, let’s go finish up In Hushed Whispers.

I’m still getting used to the idea that I don’t necessarily need a second rogue, and once I have a warrior and a mage, the free spot could go to anyone, even a second mage. I could give Vivienne and Solas time to annoy each other! But I have in-character reasons to bring Varric and/or Sera with me most of the time.

In other words, I’m going to be boring and bring Blackwall and Varric with me to Redcliffe again.

Shut up, Alexius, you’re terrible and your hood looks silly.

It always hurts to see the babies all red lyrium’d. And Leliana in the awful state she’s in.

I get it, Leliana, I’ve got a soft spot for the Wardens (and for Blackwall) too.

And it’s late, so picking up Iron Bull and closing the Breach will have to wait for tomorrow.

[secretsfromwholecloth]

Dragon Age: Inquisition, day 5.

Time to bang out some companion quests before I finish Here Lies the Abyss. First up, Dorian.

What accent is Halward’s VA going for?

Clearing the air with Halward is good and useful, but if you think Avasis or any of my characters would be on board with pressuring Dorian to forgive him, you don’t know me very well.

And kissing has happened. No, go back to the first camera angle where I couldn’t see their mouths, this one is just awkward!

And right off the back of that scene, Mother Giselle has shown up to give Dorian a scolding (and been told exactly where she can stick it). Is that usual?

Next up, let’s go talk to the Comte with Josephine.

You know, unlike my usual MO in RPGs (be blandly nice on the first run, then still a good guy but significantly more vicious on the second), Avasis is, if anything, less violent than Linniva, I suppose because he’s a) lugging around less anger from his upbringing and b) able to accomplish a lot just by looming over people, so while he’s quite good at stabbing, he doesn’t need to do it as often as you might think.

And now, going after Solas’ spirit friend.

Good old Exalted Plains, I’ve claimed three landmarks before I’ve made it more than a stone’s throw from camp.

Oh, hey, the Dalish encampment, let’s pick up some side quests while we’re here.

Normally I’d let Solas kill the mages, but Avasis has been bizarrely non-violent for someone who was a mercenary until recently and whose specialty is getting up close and personal with the murdering, so he stopped him, “Solas disapproves” be damned.

You know, I was reluctant to go for Assassin with this character, because there’s already a dagger rogue assassin in the party. But it makes the most sense for the character, and I’m this close to having all the stuff for it. This close. If I don’t get that third assassin blade for the murder knife soon, I may do an actual murder.

It took a rather tedious trip back to Crestwood, but I got it, thank fuck.

And now, to the Western Approach. I can’t not bring Varric and Blackwall on this one, and Dorian gets the other spot for love-interest reasons.

Oh, hello, Frederic! <3 We can’t go after your dragon yet, but it is lovely to hear you.

Fuck you, Erimond.

“The Grey Wardens are heroes! They would never do this willingly!” Oh, Blackwall.

Be nice to your father-in-law, Dorian. And “Just because two people dislike each other doesn’t mean they’re about to kiss” is good life advice, honestly.

You know, I can only imagine how Pavey felt turning in her report on Adamant and having Cullen be there to receive it, considering everything that went down in Kirkwall. She must’ve given him quite an impressive death glare when she first saw him at Skyhold.

OK, I’d forgotten the dialogue about some of the Wardens seeing sense and turning, there’s hope for the Awakening crew even if they’re here. Though I would still prefer they not be.

Goddammit, Clarel.

Fade time!

I would tell Nightmare to shut up, but it’s so much fun to listen to.

“Ironically, Spiders” is still funny.

“Recruit Loghain and push him onto the grenade” was always the plan, both in and out of universe, even as the grenade changed its shape more than once. But regretful, fixing-his-shit Loghain has grown on me enough (and Pavey has little enough to live for and just the right sort of personality) that I genuinely have a decision to make.

It’s done. Good luck surviving Nightmare, Loghain. And good luck at Weisshaupt, Pavey. I hope you get to see Carver again and he’s OK, and then you can find a way to make a new life for yourself.

And now, more Dorian romance. Aww. See, looming works great, it got that tedious Orlesian to give up the amulet right away!

And it’s late, so more tomorrow.

[secretsfromwholecloth]

Dragon Age: Inquisition, day 15.

Welp, Doom Upon All the World time. Let’s do this.

I’m going to be boring and do the “usual undroppables plus Solas in the free spot” thing again, which in this case translates into a party of Dorian, Blackwall, and Solas.

Wow, the thunder outside really adds to the drama as I play through this. :D

Why’s Cassandra—I didn’t put her in the party by accident, did I—oh, poor Harding—oh, there we go.

Thanks, Morrigan!

Can blood be “engorged”? Sounds weird. I think you might’ve wanted a different word there, stretchy man.

Was that Dorian he was calling “one more rattus emerged from the garbage”? Not nice. You’ll get extra stabbed for that.

Now that I get a good look at him, have mages’ feathered capelets (if they go all the way around the back, they’re not pauldrons) really not changed style at all in so many centuries? Anders’ was sleeker, due no doubt to graphical limitations, but they’re otherwise nearly identical.

Oh, a break for dragon time. Eat it, stretchy dragon.

And the stretchy man has been thoroughly stabbed. Solas needed a couple of healing potions, but as for the others, a full guard bar is a beautiful thing.

YEET

Aw, poor Solas, his orb is broken.

Hello, babies. <3 All right, let’s have a nice chat with everyone before we move on.

Avasis has spent half the game wanting to give most of his inner circle big, squishy hugs (I know, it surprised me too to see him develop that way), but the game doesn’t want to give me that option, so nice chats will have to suffice.

Aww, Dorian’s romantic bit when leaving the party is sweet.

And let’s jump into Trespasser, shall we?

Oh, bless you, Josephine, and your very strange idea of what constitutes a quiet evening out.

You know, it makes me kind of uncomfortable the way not only this DLC but the endings of both the base game and Origins spend their time jumping up and down and yelling “Didn’t you want this? And this? And this? Look at all the things you always wanted!” And even if I genuinely did want the thing, the way we’re given it feels...wrong.

Case in point: “Look! Cullen is happy this time, and he’s playing with a dog instead of being mobbed! Aren’t you happy? Isn’t this what you wanted the whole time?” It’s better than a repeat of his treatment in Wicked Eyes and Wicked Hearts, but...hrnnnngh.

Did Bran sound this much like Sebastian doing an accent in DA2? I can’t remember that being the case. I mean, I know it’s the same VA, but...

OK, he’s back to normal after his first couple of lines. Weird.

I love to play Avasis as blithely Not Getting It when his friends try to complain to him. You’re the viscount now, Varric? That’s wonderful!

I’d absolutely read about the adventures of Aveline and Shokrakar.

“Assignment: Free Marches, Vimmark Mountains, reporting to Warden Stoudenmire in ongoing investigation of Vimmark Prison” Wasn’t that what Varric said Carver was off doing? Say hello to him for me, Thom. And if you find any of the Awakening babies on the way, give them a hug for me.

Cassandra, you dork, I think you’ve been reading too much of that smutty literature. You’ve put an idea in Avasis’ head, certainly, but he and Dorian both have work to do and marriage won’t be in the cards for a while yet if it ever is.

Heh, the thing with the Chargers is cute.

Aww, Cole.

Aww, Dorian.

Teagan’s hateboner for the Wardens and their involvement in Fereldan politics never stops being utterly bizarre in a timeline with a King Alistair, especially given the involvement of Teagan himself in Alistair’s court (as evidenced by the fact that he’s here at the Winter Palace to be complaining). Were Anora ruling alone, he might have a leg to stand on.

It was even worse in Linniva’s timeline, where Alistair’s seemingly well-loved queen was doubling as Ferelden’s Warden-Commander—at least Alistair himself banged out of the Wardens when he took the throne!—but it still makes very little sense here.

Today on “So, who gets the free spot in the party?” The only clear shoo-in for eluvian-related shenanigans is obviously gone. I brought Varric last time, though he does have some great dialogue that I wouldn’t mind hearing again.

Mages are useful, and unlike last time I don’t have a Knight-Enchanter as my Inquisitor. Let’s air out Vivienne for a bit.

I’m sure the supply caches littered around the place are very useful on higher difficulties, but between Vivienne’s effectively inexhaustible barrier as a Knight-Enchanter and everyone else’s guard-on-hit armor, it’s fairly rare for anyone in the party to have so much as a dent put in them.

I can see where Teagan is coming from—shouting and open defiance let him rid Ferelden of a tyrant before, so why not use the same tactic again if he sees the Inquisitor as a potential second Loghain?

That said, Teagan, honey, it’s not going to work this time.

I love that you may not actually have Sandal waiting to enchant your stuff before you face the endgame in DAI, but with his diary sitting next to a “Modify Weapons” workbench, it’s almost like he’s there!

Dorian. You are not a tank. You are not even a Knight-Enchanter. A full guard bar is a beautiful thing, but that still doesn’t mean you have any business in melee range right now. Not with enemies who can deplete that guard bar in a few swipes unless you step the fuck back to the designated mage area. Please, before you give your boyfriend a heart attack.

And Dorian now has a bees-on-hit staff, which I expect to be delightful fun in the fights coming up.

Weh, Dorian. Don’t you worry, Avasis isn’t about to die on you. Not yet.

To the Darvaarad!

Oh, this is great, there are bees everywhere. I haven’t stopped giggling.

Lord Inquisitor Kill All The Dragons did not kill the dragon this time. Thanks, wiki walkthrough! Oh man, the looks on those Qunari’s faces.

The season finale of Avasis Blithely Doesn’t Get It: The Viddasala is clearly confused or lying, and Solas is his kind of racist but staunch and helpful friend who’s clearly in trouble and needs Avasis to save him, right? Right?!

Things got hairy a couple of times on the way to Saarath, but the actual fight against him wasn’t too bad. Whew.

And the Inquisition will be kept going, because they have to find Solas and convince him not to do the thing, right?

This is the first time I sat through the credits. Varric’s writing and Cassandra’s impressions of everyone are great. BRB, dying.

And since we’re saying goodbye to Avasis, a picture of the baby, as per SOP. (I wasn’t kidding about that red thing being unflattering on him.)

[secretsfromwholecloth]

Dragon Age: Inquisition, day 12.

Three of the five “I’m sorry, I have to get up where?!” shards in the Oasis have been gotten, thankfully, but I still have no idea how to get to the other two.

Never mind “that one shard in the Hinterlands”, the catchphrase should be “those two shards in the Oasis”.

There goes #4. Dare I hope?

Got it! Good ol’ DAI, where sometimes the answer really is “yeet yourself off the side of a walkway at precisely the right angle”.

...of course it’s a pride demon. I should really have seen that coming.

And now, back to Skyhold, because fuck this place.

Looks like I’ve nearly mopped up aside from DLCs. You know what, let’s go do What Pride Had Wrought.

Oh, right, this quest contains one last dose of Morriganing.

I think I’ll keep the Dorian/Blackwall/Solas party going, I didn’t use Solas for most of the game and he’s still giving good banter with the other two. And a second mage is always good for keeping barriers up in hard fights.

It’s sweet to see the advisors out in the field with you on this one.

The stretchy man’s body-surfing scene never gets any less nasty.

Blackwall, dear, I didn’t realize you were so pious.

Ah, Solas and Morrigan sniping at each other, great fun.

Huh, Abelas has a rather nice voice, I’d forgotten.

Morrigan, no one was talking about destroying the Well until you decided you absolutely needed to drink from it. Just a thought.

Hey, Solas, you realized no one asked you what you said to Abelas, right?

And it’s done. Bye-bye, stretchy man. For now.

OK, now it’s Frostback Basin time. This should be delightful fun.

Who do I bring? Dorian is undroppable, my own favoritism in distributing gear has made Blackwall effectively undroppable (he and Dorian have spent so much time together in the party that they’ve reached the end of their banter chain and tentatively become friends, it’s sweet), but who gets the free spot? Obviously it only matters so much, as there’ll be opportunities to swap people out, but no obvious options are really suggesting themselves. You know what, I’ve barely touched Vivienne, let’s annoy her by dragging her through the mountains.

Hello, Professor Kenric. And Professor Kenric’s voice.

Aww, Harding.

Yay, shards! I love chasing after shards! Wait, I’m being told that’s not what “love” means, and the word I want here is “loathe” or possibly “fuck this shit”.

I had a good laugh at the banter where Dorian and Vivienne agree on who their true common enemy is: the Antivans.

This is going to sound horrible, but while I’ve tried to like Vivienne—intellectually, I know there’s a lot to like there! she doesn’t deserve to be disliked any more than any other party member!—the degree to which she has it in for Blackwall is making that impossible. Well, I always did freely admit to being horrible.

Dagger rogue + equipment made with fade-touched whatever that gives a few points of guard with every hit = absolutely fucking glorious. My melee characters tend to Leeroy Jenkins right into the thick of every battle with no regard for whether they can actually tank, so anything that brings the answer to that question a bit closer to “yes” makes my life much, much easier.

Aww, Colette.

And more in the morning, it’s really very late.

[secretsfromwholecloth]

Dragon Age: Inquisition, day 1.

You know, I actually did start the game yesterday evening. I was making good progress in the Hinterlands and was just about to leave for a jaunt to Val Royeaux when a conversation with Varric revealed that I had the wrong worldstate loaded—Anders, alive? Bethany, alive? And what's this in the codex about Alistair marrying Bryce Cousland’s daughter? *headdesk* Welp, that’s me starting over.

So, meet Avasis Adaar, dual-dagger rogue and, apparently, a good, sweet boy who wants to help. By sneaking into places and stabbing stuff. He’s good at that!

I went in with absolutely no idea what I wanted to do with this character; the Internet told me I should romance Dorian because cute, but other than that, Daiwen and Pavey were the real point of this run, Avasis is just along for the ride because I have to do something with this timeline in DAI, right? So he’s just going to have to reveal himself to me as I go.

What I got from last night’s session is that he’s quite young—my first feeling was 18ish, but I revised that to 21ish to make the romance with 30-year-old Dorian more to my taste—and that Varric is his new dad now. Congratulations, Varric. I’m sure you always wanted a son twice your height who could snap you in half with his neck. Put that in your next letter to Pavey, I’m sure she’ll have some interesting comments.

Huh, I completely missed the sequence with the fearlings chasing the Inquisitor towards Glowy Justinia in the Fade last time.

Is it just me, or is melee combat in this game absolutely horrible? Turns out the “if you right-click on something out of range, we’ll automatically walk you over to it and then do the interaction” function of DAO and DA2 was load-bearing, at least for me. Archer wasn’t really an option because there are already two of those in the party and I like Varric too much to deprive him of attention, but dear Maker do I miss my mage right now.

That said, I have now discovered the joys of using the F key rather than my extremely fiddly right mouse button for interacting with stuff, which is very nice indeed.

The Shokra-taar is the best armor available in the early game by 20 points or so. Also, Qunari are rather large. Ergo, Avasis will be spending his time at Haven pointing his nipples right into the eyes of the human and elven inhabitants. Enjoy, everyone.

“Pointing” being the appropriate term for it, as Haven is cold.

Solas is cutting quite a figure in the shibari bikini Antaam-saar, too.

What’s this in the codex about Adaar’s parents being Tal-Vashoth who left the Qun? Man, now I’m going to have a whole pile of second-generation feels. A very large pile of them.

Shut up, Roderick.

Whew, definitely got the right worldstate now. Threnn is talking about how Anora sent her to the Inquisition as a kindness to a supporter of her father, and I have the option to respond with “Loghain is a Grey Warden now.” (She referenced King Alistair last time, who exists in both timelines, hence me not catching on.)

Hello, Cullen. Hey, it’s someone whose job Avasis properly understands, rather than chalking it up to “does some magic and somewhere along the line that gets translated into a job for me to do”.

Wait, that’s an instrumental version of the Samson song playing over the cutscene of the Hinterlands being scouted.

I just saw Shokrakar’s first letter. BRB, dying.

That “Harding in Hightown” pun was pretty terrible, Varric.

Whee, the Hinterlands, fun fun fun.

I like Cullen and get ferociously protective of him for reasons I’ve gone into elsewhere, but all the same, unless there’s some supplementary material I missed, I’m not sure he’s fully reckoned with his role and degree of responsibility for events in Kirkwall. You can’t just skip that part and go straight to “I’ll just quietly be a better person now,” Cullen, it’ll just keep haunting you. I would know. (I’ll be aiming a similar lecture at Blackwall, don’t you worry, but I haven’t met him yet.)

Weird to think that Cullen has the same VA as Awakening!Anders. I can hear the similarity, but only just.

For Avasis’ part, he likes Cullen well enough, but he fell under Solas’ influence early on and will be going pro-mage.

While his predecessor rocked that beige outfit, Avasis looks frankly ridiculous in it. I’ll have to pick out something better for him when I can.

The Golden Nug is a beautiful, beautiful thing. The early game is much easier when you can use those inherited schematics to make sure you’re facing it with midgame-quality gear.

Hello, Sera. You seem fun and potentially useful. But you’re going to have to wait your turn to be in the party, because no way in hell are you coming along to Vivienne’s party.

Speaking of which, hello, Vivienne. You can handle the talking to fancy people stuff with Josephine, right?

Eeeee, got Iron Bull and Blackwall’s recruitment quests. Doing them will have to wait for tomorrow, though.

[secretsfromwholecloth]

Dragon Age: Inquisition, day 11.

Am I seriously nearly done with the Hissing Wastes already? The Sandy Howler is dead, I’m just about to go raid the Tomb of Fairel, I think that’s it?

Dorian, love, shut your hole about Avasis being “sentimental”, you know you love every second.

Time to go after Samson. Good to have you along, Cullen.

OK, I feel a little bad for Samson thanks to his backstory, but it’s all gone so wrong since that I have no particular reluctance to cut him down when I encounter him in this game.

Back to the Exalted Plains to do the thing. And yes, I missed an obvious path leading out the back of a campsite. Again.

And the Gamordan Stormrider went nice and quickly, so that’s all 10 dragons in the vanilla game. Watch your back, Hakkon Wintersbreath.

The snowy wyvern and Cassandra’s last Templar target are both dead, whew. That certainly took me long enough.

I have completed a mosaic! For the first time! And yes, the last piece was somewhere embarrassingly obvious. (One of the tents near Nazaire’s Pass Camp, where I’d certainly spent enough time before but somehow not picked up the piece.)

Fine, I’ll look in on the Forbidden Oasis.

Have I ever mentioned that I loathe this place? Oh, I have? Multiple times? To the point that you’re all sick of hearing it? Well, it bears repeating.

Oh, hello, Solasan entrance. Let’s have a look.

Well, that’s nice. Worth the amount of suffering involved? Probably not. Especially since I still need five more shards, and I have a question: where the entire tap-dancing fuck are these shards I see around the Oasis, and how the all-devouring Christ do I get to them?!

So I’ll probably be getting those from the Frostback Basin and coming back. In the morning. Because it’s late.

[secretsfromwholecloth]

Dragon Age: Inquisition, day 4.

Hello again, Dagna. <3

Lord Movran the Under’s judgment never gets any less funny. I’d love for him to get a cameo somewhere in Tevinter in DA4.

Whew, I have now acquired Deft Hands, Fine Tools. The rest of the game should be significantly less annoying.

Eat pointy death, Venatori. And rogue Templars. And darkspawn. Any other companions have items to add to the pointy death shopping list?

Thank you, Varric, Avasis is absolutely up for Wicked Grace. He might even think he could give you a run for your money on a good night.

Was anyone seriously expecting Avasis to lie to Dorian about the whole thing with his father? Really?

All right, let’s look in on Loghain over in Crestwood.

“Smoldering Core” sounds like something you’d find in an M-rated fic.

Really, Mayor Dedrick. Really.

Hello again, Loghain. You had better be worth all the suffering involved in getting you here.

Well, you do seem to have rather fixed your shit, which I quite appreciate. Daiwen is still giving you the finger from some remote corner of Thedas, though.

OK, apparently level 12-13 is not dragon-slaying time. Whoops. We put a pretty big dent in it, though!

“I wonder if any part of them remembers who they were.” Uh, are we still talking about Red Templars, Blackwall?

Lots of sidequests today, hence me being less talkative than normal.

And more tomorrow, it’s late.