#autobuttsanddecepthicccons

[heliopauseentertainments]

Oooooh I’m a sucker for crossovers so how about MTMTE Megs meeting TFP, TFA (one or both) Megatron? How would it go down :0000

So this took me a bit and it’s definitely not a drabble. Downside: I’m bad at action sequences, but the one that’s here is mercifully short.

I’m also going to crosspost this to AO3, so please let me know if there’s a handle you’d like it gifted to.

Warnings: brief implication of drug addiction and some light mockery of TFP designs

Under the cut for length

—

"It seems we weren't exactly correct when we said this universe doesn't have copies of us." Perceptor extended the handle of the telescoping indicator before poking the tip of it at the screen in the conference room. With a sigh, Megatron pulled his rarely used glasses from his subspace. He hated having to use these as they made him feel old but he just couldn't quite make out the details on the screen. He could hear Rodimus snickering at his side.

With the carefully ground glass bringing the images into focus, he could see what looked to be images of… very odd-looking mechanical life forms but they looked so familiar somehow at the same time.

"Well, there aren't copies of most of us and they aren't exact copies," Perceptor continued. He coughed, dragging the indicator's tip over the image of a large mech with a broad, solid build, yet rounder and smoother in shape than Cybertronians tended to be. There were also what looked to be spiky shoulder-guards and armor pieces. There also seemed to be some sort of large weapon mounted to their right arm. He could only wonder how their physiology differed from the Cybertronians native to this universe.

"For example, this one is this universe's version of you, Captain."

"I see." He could see the resemblance, unfortunately. "It's probably unwise for us to try and make contact with them."

"I wanna meet me—"

Perceptor shook his head. "We have not identified a copy of you, Rodimus. Additionally these Cybertronians seem to have also fallen into a similar sort of war as in our universe but they've yet to reach a conclusion. We're not sure the level of devastation but it seems that our species is even further diminished here and most of those that remain are clustered around this universe's Earth."

"Fine," Megatron said, waving a hand. "We will simply avoid Earth. We have no need to get involved."

"Unfortunately, Captain, it's too late for that."

"Why?"

"We popped into this universe on the edge of the Sol system and it appears our presence has already been detected."

Well, that was just great.

—

"Open a channel on-screen." Megatron crossed his legs at the knees while waiting. He could only hope that for three seconds Rodimus wouldn't blurt something out. The younger captain had gotten better control of some of his outbursts with support and experience, but Megatron had asked him this time to please just let him handle it. They had no idea how this universe's copies would react to their presence. While they had received a hail from a ship that bore some similarities to the Nemesis, they couldn't be sure what to expect. The fundamentals that seemed to underly this universe’s Cybertronian technology seemed similar enough but it was plain to see that it was by no means identical.

An image flashed onto the screen of a scowling, scarred, dark gray face. Ah. How… unpleasant. It was hard to see scale through the video feed, but he could only assume they were of similar heights. Even if the shapes were different, they both clearly shared some choices, such as a repurposed mining helmet. Well, he assumed that was the original usage of the helmet on screen. The face opened his mouth full of sharp, predatory teeth, speaking with a raspy voice. Had this version of him ruined his filters somehow? Spent all of his free time huffing tar smoke? Damaged his vocalizer?

"Autobot ship, the only reason we are contacting you instead of destroying you on sight is because our scans picked up… interesting information."

What an aft. Had he been like this before? He must have been. How insufferable.

"I'm certain you have," he replied. "We're passing through." It felt… wrong to walk away from the conflict here but they were in no position to intervene. If they hadn't already been spotted, Megatron would have had the ship fly out of this system as quickly as possible.

"Not so fast. Our scans indicate that you've come from… a different universe and you are of particular interest."

"Megs, this guy looks like a rusty can. We can totally take him."

Dammit. Rodimus just couldn't help himself sometimes, could he? Megatron sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. The visible sign of displeasure was clearly seen, understood, and duly ignored by his co-captain.

"He does though!"

"Not now, Rodimus. Please."

Now he had no choice but to move forward. Megatron looked back up at the screen and decided to bank on an unproven similarity by responding to his counterpart in Tarnish. "What do you want from us?"

The answer was, luckily, in kind.

"A visit. We have much to discuss."

—

Much to discuss indeed. It was difficult to know what they could expect. They didn't know how this war had progressed or why. It seemed like the devastation had been far worse if the forces of both sides were so scattered as to huddle around this tiny organic world, a world Megatron had hoped to never once again visit. They’d nearly destroyed it once and now it sat here, threatened by Cybertronian aggression once more. However, he had at least been able to draw this universe’s copy of the Nemesis further out to the rim of the solar system for their meeting, putting some useful distance between that fragile planet and the threat posed by a race that scarcely knew peace.

The two ships waited in orbit around a small, frozen world in one of the outer belts of icy objects that ringed the system. A shuttle descended from each to the designated rendezvous point on a plain of permafrost. There would be clear lines of sight from all angles. Little atmosphere clung to this world so there would have been little interference for communication to their respective ship, but there was enough that regular communication via vocalizer would function. Too little gas and speech would have been inaudible.

“Are you ready, Rodimus?” Megatron asked, standing by the door to the gangway while Crankcase set their shuttle down on the stark white ground with a soft crunch. He… wouldn’t have said he felt nervous per se, but he did have some… trepidation about meeting his counterpart, let alone allowing Rodimus to come along. “Allowing” wasn’t quite the right word either. Rodimus had simply refused to be told “no” and there had been little Megatron could do about it. It wasn’t worth the argument and if he knew anything by now it was that the speedster could take care of himself.

“Absolutely! Never been more ready in my life!” he said, pulling a pair of blasters from the rack on the wall like he was expecting trouble the moment the door opened. Did he forget that he had blasters built into his forearms again or did he just want more guns just in case? Who did he think he was going to intimidate?

It was going to be one of those days.

—

There was little wind and the ground was so frozen that the only “snow” that floated through the air was particles of ice and rock crushed and kicked up by their steps on the permafrost.

Megatron made sure he had gone first after stepping off the shuttle, much to Rodimus’ chagrin. If his counterpart in this universe was even remotely as prone to an immediate response of violence as he used to be, it would have been better if he were in front. While they didn’t know what damage the weaponry developed here could do, if anyone had a chance of surviving it unprepared, it would have more likely been him due to his heavy armor. Now, though, they stood side-to-side, waiting for the other shuttle across the field to open. Perhaps it would have been wiser to wait inside their own shuttle, but it was too late to take shelter. What a strange first contact situation.

With a loud clang, the door of the opposing shuttle opened and a heavy-looking frame exited down the gangway before approaching. This figure crossed the field towards them with a purposeful and sturdy gait, a matching scowl. He recognized that gait, not just as his own but what it meant. Megatron’s counterpart must have also fought in the pits, something that left many subtle marks on all who had fallen prey to its teeth. This would be a dangerous foe indeed if it did come to a fight.

However, something else struck him about this mech, beyond the familiarities and oddly round shape. He was… more than a full head shorter and not nearly as massive. Bulky, sure, but he felt like he was watching a glass canon approach, not a bringer of death. Perhaps he was sturdier than he appeared. Megatron heard Rodimus mumble something about “kind of puny.”

“Let’s get the formalities out of the way,” he said when the approaching mech stopped several yards away, “I’m—”

“I know who you are.”

How bold. Apparently they were to continue this conversation like they had on their respective bridges, in Tarnish rather than Neocybex, which unfortunately Rodimus couldn’t understand. The dialects were slightly different, but it had been a long time since he’d encountered anyone who could speak his native language. It was refreshing, but if only it could have been a more pleasant occasion rather than an unwanted encounter with a doppelgänger warlord.

“Do you really?”

This universe’s Megatron growled and sneered in response. Ah, so they both shared a distaste for being tested. That was fine. That meant he knew just where to press. He smirked.

“You wear that badge and you bring backup like a coward.”

“Oh, him? Hardly. He’s here for your protection.” A bluff, of course. “Now what did you want with me?”

He could hear Rodimus shifting his weight uneasily, the frozen crust crunching underfoot. He always seemed to hate not understanding what was going on, but now wasn’t the time for an impromptu lesson in Tarnish. Maybe one of these days he could convince his co-captain to learn, but presently they had far more pressing matters… like the threat right in front of them.

Something was off.

“Less with you and more that you have something I want.”

Perhaps it was supplies, resources…. The look of that ship that the other Megatron had arrived in spoke volumes to the lack of resources and probably a lack of fuel. Still there was something in his copy’s optics that seemed wrong. There was malice, of course, mistrust and… Oh. He knew that shake of the optic lens all too well.

Withdrawal.

Without warning, his counterpart raised his right arm and pointed it square at Megatron’s Autobot badge, the strange contraption that must have passed for a cannon here lighting up, a humming noise growing louder as it charged.

Rodimus raised the pair of blasters he had brought with him from the shuttle and without hesitation let off two shots to the warlord’s raised wrist. The cannon was knocked to the side, its charge cycle interrupted as the purple glow faded.

While their assailant was distracted getting his bearings, Megatron rushed forward, throwing his weight into his counterpart’s center mass. As they hit the ice with a loud crack, he pinned his opponent’s right arm above the stunned warlord’s head with own left arm, keeping the cannon out of play. Crunching ice made it clear that Rodimus was rapidly approaching. Perfect. They didn’t have much time before this drugged out mech collected himself enough to fight back.

Hopefully his knowledge of Cybertronian physiology would work here.

“Rodimus, left temple. Now!”

“Can do!”

With a swift kick to the side of the copy’s head, those strange yet familiar optics fizzled offline.

Megatron leaned back, unhooking the cannon and tossing it aside before opening the commlink panel on his wrist.

“Ratchet,” he said, “we have a patient inbound.”

So much for not interfering in this universe’s conflict.

[rcxdirectrix]

Sparkeaters :)

(Sparkeater Megatron is for @autobuttsanddecepthicccons as thanks for drawing and coloring over my sparkeater perce sketch earlier.)

[my-writings-and-musings]

I did some simple line art, and when I couldn't figure out for the life of me how to color @autobuttsanddecepthicccons offered to try something and produced this MASTERPIECE!!

SHE LOOKS SO BEAUTIFUL EVERYONE LOOK I'M SO HAPPYYYYYYY

[optimal-spark]

A sketch I did for the lovely @autobuttsanddecepthicccons as apart of our art trade!!! This was so fun to do!

[heliopauseentertainments]

I can’t think of anything specific but I am craving fluff featuring the OT3 UltraMegaRod if you feel up to it 👀💙

I don’t know that I came up with anything particularly fluffy, but here we go!

Under the cut for length, just shy of 900 words

Summary: It’s hard to plan a birthday present.

Warnings: Suggestive themes, nothing remotely explicit just implied

Rating: Teen

—

"Rodimus, he doesn't particularly care for surprises," Minimus said, having clambered up into chair at the desk normally meant for Ultra Magnus. Meanwhile, Rodimus doodled on the wall's built-in light-board with a pen under the heading "The Big Guy's Creation Day." It would be easier to participate in the planning if he could actually see the board without having to either stand on something or lean around a race-car. Several ideas—suggestions such as “candy” or “handcuffs” or “movie night”—were already scrawled across the surface, most already crossed out from before Minimus had arrived. “You ought to know that by now.”

"Are you kidding? This'll be great. He's gonna love it." Rodimus emphasized the point by hopping once in place, spoiler fins twitching up.

"I hardly think hiding under his desk and jumping out to startle him is an appropriate way to provide him a creation day present." It certainly wasn't a way to say "we love and cherish you." Not that Minimus was an expert in expressing that anyway.

"Okay, okay, maybe not. You'd think he'd be less jumpy at his age," Rodimus said, as though Minimus weren't even older than Megatron. It wasn't as though Rodimus was quite that young either, despite how he tended to act. Minimus crossed his arms as he sat down on the books piled into Ultra Magnus’ chair.

The speedster tapped his chin in thought, clearly trying to come up with something else. Minimus could only hope it would be something rather less likely to result in furniture getting broken in the chaos of a giant tank's exaggerated startle response or that wouldn't result in a call to the medical bay from said tank potentially experiencing sudden spark failure. Either could happen depending.

"What if,” Rodimus began, a wide, less-than-innocent grin stretching across his face, “we tied ribbons into cute little bows around ourselves and waited in the habsuite for him to come home from his command shift?"

Minimus was sorely tempted to tell the exuberant speedster to put that naughty smirk away, but he knew that would only encourage him.

"That seems unnecessarily risqué and, most importantly, doesn't include actually giving him the present." Besides, Minimus felt like perhaps that was not the best way to set the tone, at least not upfront. Rodimus pouted and crossed out some more… private suggestions that really shouldn't have been on the board in the first place, not as a gift anyway.

Minimus cleared his vocalizer with a cough.

"Furthermore, we haven't even gotten him anything yet. Did you even ask what he would want?" You know, like a thoughtful person would have already done before trying to plan a surprise.

Rodimus pshawed and waved a dismissive hand at the smallest member of their relationship.

"Of course not. He'd just say something like 'don't get me anything' or 'it's not important.' So we'll just have to intuit what we wants." The red speedster paused, like he doubted himself. "Somehow. We'll figure it out. It's gotta be something flashy, you know?"

"Flashy" was a word that didn't really apply where their largest conjunx was concerned. "Opinionated" and "loud," though in a different way than Rodimus was, were better descriptors, but despite that Megatron tended towards subtlety in aesthetic taste. Well, minimalism and utilitarianism were more accurate. The only possessions he owned tended to be whatever Rodimus and Minimus had given him over the years, with the exception of his surgical kit. That made selecting an appropriate gift all the more important.

"You gave him a rock last year." Minimus tutted, waving an admonishing finger. Never mind the fact that the rock now lived on Megatron’s desk in the captain’s office as a paperweight. It was a rock and Minimus felt certain the only reason it remained was because Megatron didn’t want to hurt Rodimus’ feelings by being rid of it.

"Yeah, but it was shiny and cool—"

"—And the year before that was the Rodimus Star for 'not putting Whirl in the brig'."

Which was ridiculous.

Megatron should have just done it. Whirl had been playing tag in the hallways with Misfire and getting too carried away with the foam-dart guns. A brief stay in the brig was the most appropriate response but Megatron had overruled Minimus in the guise of Ultra Magnus while in the middle of making the arrest.

"That wasn't his creation day present. That was just convenient timing. I gave him his actual present later." Which Minimus had the misfortune of walking in on after work.

Rodimus stopped doodling and pointed the writing utensil in his hand the green minibot.

"And last year you got a new light-pen." He mockingly waggled the pen pinched between his fingers.

"He goes through so many, Rodimus! It was practical." All that writing Megatron did in his spare time, it was a thoughtful gift to get him something he would actually need and use. “It was an exceptionally sturdy one.” Because someone was a heavy-handed writer.

Still, this discussion and planning session was getting them absolutely nowhere.

"Why don't we simply ask him what he wants and just do that? We can't go wrong that way."

"Fine, you ask him what boring thing he thinks he wants and I'll surprise him with something awesome."

How many ways could that plan go wrong?

[heliopauseentertainments]

🎶 🍻 🥲 for the TF asks :>

TRANSFORMERS ASK GAME

🎶- Best Theme song?

I actually tend to hate theme songs on principle but in my defense, my hearing doesn’t work great and sensory issues. So actually my favorite “theme” song from the franchise is the cover of the G1 theme by Powerglove.

🍻- Character that deserves a year of free drinks at Maccadams

Ultra Magnus in IDW1. He doesn’t drink, but by G-d he deserves a year of tasty soda/spritzers for all of the absolute nonsense he puts up with AND still manages to keep trucking. Like damn, son.

Secondarily, I would also nominate TFA!Optimus for free drinks. He’s a new dad and needs all the help he can get.

🥲- Saddest Anime Betrayal?

You know, that’s hard to say given that literally every character in the franchise could be construed as a traitor if you try, but I don’t think I have an instance that I would consider the Saddest One.

I mean, Prowl’s betrayal of Mesothulas/Tarantulas the first time around in IDW1 was p sad, even with the context surrounding it. This one is hard to me to answer so I’mma go with that.

[heliopauseentertainments]

I'm taking votes on what one shot that got magically got subscribers to add a new chapter to when working on stuff for Reforged. If none of these end up vibing, no biggie. I still take requests.

Because sometimes I gotta hack my brain a bit or do warm-up writing. I cannot promise super well-planned out plots. No guarantee of a full project, just another chapter for funsies.

- Settlement (AO3) (Tumblr)

A weird cracky arranged marriage AU for vaguely IDW1!Starscream/Prowl based on a series of dumb drabbles that I spot-welded together into a one shot. My #starprowl tag actually has the original drabbles.

- An Unintentional Voyage (AO3) (Tumblr)

A prompt fill I did for May 2021′s Rare TF Pair Event. G1-esque!Megatron/Ratchet lost in space shenanigans and Ratchet patching up an absolute dumbass. 

- An Interesting Opportunity (AO3) (Tumblr)

A crossover request I did for @autobuttsanddecepthicccons the ended up a one shot on accident. IDW1 Lost Lighters accidentally quantum leap into the TFP universe, with a focus on IDW!Megatron meeting TFP!Megan.

Note: Updates would be to the AO3 copy because multi-chapter stuff on Tumblr is... mad awk. You may have also noticed I’m bad at naming things.

Vote via reblogging this post or commenting on it. Comments will probably work better tho.

[presidentstarscream]

@autobuttsanddecepthicccons

You can’t deny that Megatron is purely drawn for comic book readers to ogle. He’s way more sexualized that any of the female bots. Just look at the scene with Rung where he’s stretched out on the bed. Or when he’s just casually walking around. Milne always focuses on his thighs, crotch and waist. Plus his face is drawn to be high cheekbones and strong, so it has appeal to some. It’s pure fanservice and now IDW2 Megs is going to be sexed up

what the FUCK are you talking about

[whiteeagle29]

@autobuttsanddecepthicccons heyy

[presidentstarscream]

@autobuttsanddecepthicccons

[presidentstarscream]

@autobuttsanddecepthicccons u

He,,,, Hot

[my-favorite-aesthetics]

@autobuttsanddecepthicccons #OKAY BUT I GOTTA KNOW WHOS HOLDING THE CAMERA

hmm... Blurr?

[performing repairs on the outer hull of the ship, the person behind the shaky camera trying to muffle laughter]

Roddy, pointing, a huge smile on his face: WWWWWWWWWHAT ARE THOOOOOOOOOSE?!??

Kup, who has been asked this five times already, now very annoyed and confused: Those are my magnetic stabilizer boots.