#aunt and uncle staying in the same airbnb and i wasn’t told about this until last week

[iliveinprocrasti-nationn]

12 hour road trip tomorrow stuck in the car one on one with my mum. i already do not really want to go but this could provide another layer of psychic damage

[3monthsineurope]

August 5, 2021

Thursday morning, Ingvar and I got up at 4:30! We were going to California for a wedding for his cousin. It was sure an early day! We had packed up the day before, so we just got ready and made some oatmeal for a small breakfast. Ingvar drove my car down to SeaTac. Our first stop was Crusin’ Coffee, right by our place. Ingvar got a coffee, but I had already had a Xanax for my anxiety, so coffee didn’t seem like the best idea. The drive down was east! I had no anxiety, which was so nice!

We got the the Master Park B parking lot right around 7am. We hopped on a shuttle and got dropped off at the airport. Ingvar and I were so excited! We didn’t have bags to check, but the security line was pretty long. I skipped TSA pre check, since Ingvar doesn’t have it. We waited about 20 minutes, but eventually made it through security. I haven’t had my bags pulled aside to be searched in ages, which has been nice. Once we got through security, we went to the American Express Centurion Lounge. It was my first time in this lounge! We got escorted in and we each got a mimosa. The food was probably the best I’ve had in lounges! Maybe it was that way because things are getting more “normal”, now that Covid is starting to dissipate? I had some toast with a nut butter and berries, some yogurt with blueberries, and a small smoothie. Ingvar also had some sliced meat and cheese. I finished Ingvar’s mimosa and he got a beer. The lounge is just such a nice start to our airport experience!

We hung out at the lunge for about a half hour, then it was time to head to our gate. We didn’t have to take the train, so we just made our way to the D gates. We were flying into Ontario, CA, which is about an hour east of LA, and we were flying with Alaska Airlines. The flight itself was about two and a half hours and easy. Ingvar read on my Kindle, and I slept, haha. Once we arrived at Ontario, it was so hot! It was in the mid 90s that day! We arrived around noon, and found out that Uber doesn’t go to the airport, and that Lyft had “limited” drivers. So, we went outside and got a taxi, like the old days, haha!

The driver was really jerky, which almost made me feel sick! And I was still wearing a sweatshirt from traveling, and the AC in the taxi wasn’t working very well. But, we made it to the town of our Airbnb, Upland! It was about a 20 minute drive. The Airbnb owner had sent me an email with some places to eat at in Upland. Ingvar and I had looked them up earlier, and decided on a place called Butter. We had the taxi drive drop us off there, and I was very happy to get out of that car!

Butter looked really cute! It had plants all around as decor. We dropped our bags off at a table, and headed up to the counter to order. I ended up getting a breakfast sandwich on a biscuit, with tater tots, while Ingvar ordered huevos rancheros with roasted potatoes. I also ordered an iced dark chocolate mocha and loved it! The food was really tasty! We really enjoyed the lunch of breakfast food at Butter. While we were there, I texted our Airbnb host, Reed, that we were in town. He ended up calling us around 1:30, telling us that our place was ready! It was really nice to not have to wait around until normal check in time, at 3. We called a Uber and it was just a five or so minute drive to our place! We had a great driver, Neuman. He told us about Upland and was just a really nice guy. We dropped us off in a really nice area. It was a one story house, with our door in the back. Our little apartment was so cute! We unlocked the door with a code and entered into a little kitchenette and eating area, with a bathroom and bedroom off of it. The bathroom had a shower, the kitchen had a mini fridge and microwave and table. The bedroom had a closet and honestly so much storage. It was perfect for our little two day trip!

Ingvar wasn’t feeling the best when we got there (probably exhausted from traveling and not much sleep, also the heat), so we decided to hang out in our place for a bit. We turned on the AC in the bedroom and watched some of the Tokyo Olympics and both took about an hour long nap. After a few hours of relaxing, we both felt a lot better! We decided to use Instacart for the first time (Instacart will go grocery shopping for you and drop off off for you, within a few hours). We had free delivery for being first time users, and we decided it would be cheaper than us taking an Uber to a grocery store, then grocery shopping, then taking another Uber home. We ordered some sandwich stuff and some fruit to eat over the next few days. We hung around and checked out the pool while we waited for our order, then it showed up around 6.

We made some sandwiches for dinner and then went swimming in the pool! We met Reed, our host, while we were on the patio. He is a nice, grandpa aged man. He enjoyed chatting with his guests, you could just tell. He and his wife live in the house, and we had access to their pool and patio. He made the connection for me that the wedding venue for the next day, Sweet Pea Ranch, is on the way up to Mount Baldy! Mom, Dad, Haley, and I had been to a wedding on Mount Baldy almost three years prior, to the date! We all had went to a wedding for my dad’s friend, Gerald. How funny that I was back in the same area! Ingvar and I stayed out in the pool for a while— the temperature was so nice! It was 85 when we were swimming, but it felt colder? We decided it was probably the humidity. At home, when it’s 85, the humidity is also high, so it feels hotter.

After hanging out in the pool, we called it a night. We watched some more of the Olympics and Ingvar watched a movie (I didn’t pay too much attention). We actually booked a trip to visit Aunt Lisa and Uncle Mike in Phoenix, in November! So that made me really happy! I found round trip tickets for under $150 each. We went to bed before midnight. It was a really nice travel day! Ingvar and I were having a blast, being together. :]

[weddingaaha]

Wedding Wisdom: Advice From Former Brides and Grooms

There are some lessons that can only be learned after your wedding day.

We asked our readers to share some of what they had learned from their trips down the aisle. Here is a selection of tales of lost rings, ripped gowns and sweaty nuptials from former brides and grooms.

1. Cherish Time With Those Who Matter

It’s O.K. to not invite people. We stressed over the guest list for a long time, but by keeping it to close family and friends we were able to spend quality time with all our guests. Looking back, I know that the day wasn’t just for us. It was also to celebrate the love and support of those who helped us get to this point in our lives, as a couple and as individuals. I was lucky enough to dance with my grandfather at my wedding. It was the last time we were together as a family, he passed a few months after. It will remain one of my favorite memories of that day.

2. Ring Overboard

Our wedding rings were kept in one jewelry box that our best man was holding in his pocket. My ring had a bracket with the center engagement ring inside; my husband's ring was in the pocket of the box. We repeatedly told the best man that my ring was loose, so be careful opening the spring-loaded box. Unfortunately, that advice wasn't enough. As I was coming down the aisle with my father, he opened the box to get the rings ready without looking at it closely. My ring popped out and fell to the deck of our Waterside Lake ceremony. The engagement ring popped out and fell into the lake! Our best man crashed to the deck, but couldn’t save it. My husband thought he passed out from the 90-degree weather, but soon learned that my engagement ring had fallen into the lake. I didn't know this happened until the middle of the ceremony when my husband had the ring in his hand, and I whispered “Where's the other half?” He said, “Just roll with it." So the lesson learned: Have the rings in separate boxes or have them tied to a pillow. Fortunately, we had a successful ending with a ring retrieval. We used the photographers light and a very trustworthy friend in the lake. My ring was presented to me at the reception, and all was made good again.

3. How to Wine and Dine

I wish I had stayed in close touch with the caterer the week leading up to the wedding. Because of a miscommunication, I walked into my reception to find the wrong entree on the tables. Check in all week long as you prep for the reception, and triple check the menu for any changes. My brother-in-law went out and bought a bottle of each of the wines the caterer had suggested for his daughter's upcoming wedding so he could sample them at home. This was a genius idea. You could taste them at a leisurely pace, and you can also know what they taste like an hour after they've been opened.

4. Make Your Wedding Feel Like Home

Money saved! We got married in our living room. Then, five months later, we had a cookout with a D.J., open bar and food. Everyone said they had a blast, and a couple people even thanked us for being “nontraditional.” We invited all of our friends in town, got a couple of Airbnbs and planned a Detroit-themed weekend. We spent $3,000 for everything, cash. Then saved up and spent $15,000 on our two-week honeymoon to East Africa.

5. Not For the Faint of Heart

Take location seriously because your photos show so much more than a beautiful view. I loved that we had our wedding in Mexico, but the weather wasn't for the faint of heart. We didn't even make it to pictures before our wedding party was sweaty, hot and out of their suits. Yes, aesthetics are the ultimate goal, but unhappy people aren't fun. And that's the point of weddings: fun.

6. All the Wrong Things Make All the Best Stories

Just as my then-fiancé and I stood up from this photo, he stepped on my dress and ripped part of the train. I'd been so careful to shield my dress from horses, dirt paths, unfinished wood, my own heels and grass. None of this was easy when you're getting married in a field outside of a ski lodge in Idaho. In one second, all of that work was rendered fruitless. I wish someone had told me that no wedding is perfect, that something is always going to go wrong. More likely, numerous things are going to go wrong. The hairstylist will get amnesia and forget what you agreed on (this also happened to me). The cake will fall apart. The flowers won't arrive until after the ceremony. People will give toasts regardless of your efforts to stop them from grabbing a microphone after a bottle of wine. That's just what weddings are like, and that's O.K. It's more than O.K. A perfect wedding is a boring wedding. It's the things that go wrong that become the stories you'll tell the most after the fact, especially when you're trying to comfort other brides.

7. An Old Tradition Gone Wrong

Don’t let your girlfriends have the keys to your wedding suite. They put crackers in our bed and said it was an old Swedish tradition. It ruined our sleep and we were so tired from the long day.

8. Memories Aren’t in the Details

Don’t get a wedding planner. Also, no need to spend money on small details (stationery, table décor, etc.). No one will remember them anyway.

9. The Less the Merrier

Don’t make assumptions about how many guests will decline. Plan as if each invitee will be there. This means you need to think carefully and practically about the guest list. We started with a large list and delicately (and sometimes uncomfortably) whittled it down. This is your day. Who do you actually want to share it with?

10. If It’s Fine, It’s Good Enough

As a professional event planner, I thought I would handle my own wedding planning easily. In reality it meant that I overthought and second-guessed every decision because I thought it had to be “perfect” — in hindsight, I wish I had realized that “good” was fine! I sent my bridesmaids dozens of emails with ideas for which bracelet I should wear. I researched countless floral arrangements and color schemes. I meticulously sewed 100 napkins in vintage floral fabrics. And for what? I wish I'd just relaxed, and enjoyed the process, and stopped doing so much work to decide everything. I always joke with my brides now, “Did you keep dating after you got engaged, or did you stop looking for a partner? Were you able to meet every single available person out there, or did you stop when you found one you liked?” I wish I'd applied that lesson to my own event and looked at a floral arrangement and said, Yup, that works just fine.

11. Listen to Your Feet

Wear whatever shoes you want. I wore Toms, because they're comfortable. People will try and tell you that you should wear cute sandals or heels, but believe me you will thank yourself if you wear shoes that you enjoy. They're your feet and you have to stand a lot of the day. Be comfy.

12. Stranded at the Altar

Get a day-of-wedding coordinator! Our hired transportation for guests to the venue dropped the ball, leaving many stranded without a ride. The minutes before walking down the aisle were not spent sipping champagne but on the phone screaming at the bus company while my brother was helping great-aunts figure out Uber. We spent a lot on the wedding, and I wish we spent just a little bit more for someone to handle the hiccups in the day.

13. An Accordion Too Many

Although now 41 years ago, I still give all brides the same advice: Make sure your band is listed in the contract by musician’s name and instrument. I booked my band with a band leader who played at the Chicago Gold Coast Hotel. I verbally specified a piano, sax, drums and bass and said I hated electric guitars and accordions. But it wasn’t written in the contract. So guess what showed up! My only compensation was that my lawyer uncle got a 50 percent refund, but it was too late to change out the musicians that night!

14. Don’t Sweat the Weather

I always dreamed of the perfect fall outdoor event. I was glued to the weather reports leading up to the ceremony. It didn't rain, thank goodness, but it was very hot and humid despite it being October. My husband's glasses fogged up during the vows and his best man was sweating more than I thought humanly possible.

[3monthsineurope]

September 17, 2019

Tuesday morning we woke up at 6:30. So early! We both slept well, but definitely not enough, hahah. Ingvar and I brushed our teeth and changed, then Nico gave us a tour of the family house. His grandparents used to live in one third of the house, with its own kitchen and multiple rooms and a bathroom. Unfortunately, Nico’s grandma had passed away within the last month :(. Nico’s part of the house has three bedrooms for him, his brother, and mom, with a kitchen, bathroom, and living room. Then upstairs, his aunt and uncle live, with Nico’s two cousins as well. This is all the same house, with separate entrances. Nico grew up with his whole family, which I think is really cool. The house is close by to a canal, so they watch ships a lot. We were introduced to his female cousin and the family dog, Bella, a German Shepherd (haha). We gathered upall our things, then Nico drove us out of his little town.

He gave me a mini tour, since I was sleeping when he gave Ingvar one the night before. The first stop was a grocery store for some beer that is brewed locally. Even though Nico doesn’t drink, he knows a lot about beer and wanted us to try this one. I did a little make up when they went into the store, and they returned also with some yummy chocolate! Next up, Ingvar wanted to drive the autobahn! Nico drove us for a while, then we pulled over and they switched spots. Ingvar drove us about 120 mph, which is probably the fastest he’s ever driven! But it doesn’t feel too fast, since everyone drives faster than that, haha. We drove back near town, and they switched again, so Nico drove us back to Wolfsburg, where we got off the train the night before.

Nico’s mom had bought us brunch at the Volkswagen campus, which was so nice of her! She didn’t even come with us, since she had to work. Wolfsburg is all about Volkswagen! It’s definitely the main industry and economy. Everyone drives one, haha. The breakfast was buffet style and super tasty! I tried some different jams and spreads, and also some meats. After brunch, we walked around the campus for a bit. It was a super windy day! We were chilly! We went back to Nico’s car and grabbed all our stuff. Nico parked the car super far way, then met up with us. We walked to a nearby outlet mall and bopped around for a bit. We wanted to find some long white socks for Ingvar’s Oktoberfest outfit, but ended up decided to wait until Munich. Ingvar and I got Starbucks (my first pumpkin spice latte of the season! Haha), then we walked back to the HBF (main train station). It started to rain and was so windy! What a bummer.

We got to the train station and got on our 12:53 train to Dortmund, where the soccer match was that night. Our ride was about two and a half hours. I just love being on trains! It’s so relaxing and I love how they drop you off in the middle of the city. Ingvar and Nico talked soccer a lot, while I played around on my phone and snoozed a bit. We were all pretty tired, but they boys were super excited for the soccer game that night!

We arrived in Dortmund around 3:10. Nico and I both tried to figure out how to buy a group day pass for the trains, like the one we used in Berlin the day before. Neither of us could figure it out, in German or English, so we ran up to the platform where Ingvar was waiting with our bags for the train. We were in a bit of a rush, because we were meeting Nico’s friend, so he could take all of Nico’s things, since he was staying the night with him after the game. We made the right train and only had to go one stop to the stadium. Which is good, because we didn’t have a ticket! And a ticket checker was starting at the front of the train. We hopped off before she got to us, then we had to hustle to the team store. Nico took both roller bags and sped way ahead of Ingvar and I. We were all spaced out, with me in the back, speed walking, because my legs are so short, haha. Nico ran into the team store and bought a few things for his mom, then we ditched all his bags with his friend, who was waiting in the car for Nico. Once all that was taken care of, Ingvar and I took about 15 minutes to explore the team store. It was HUGE—two stories! We looked around at what Ingvar would like to buy, then went outside to trade with Nico. I stayed outside with Ingvar and I’s bags, while they went in and explored the whole shop. They were inside for about 40 minutes, so I got to call up Dad and talk to him, since there was WiFi. It was good to talk to him! Nico ended up getting a lot of stuff, including a jersey which he got embroidered. Ingvar got a windbreaker and a scarf, and a magnet for our fridge. They were getting so excited for the game!

Next up, we took two metro trains to get to Ingvar and I’s Airbnb. We picked up the key at the corner store, which was kind of funny, then dropped our bags. The place was super nice! It had a super nice bathroom (with a bath!), a bedroom, living room, and kitchen. We all charged up our phones for a bit, and the boys changed into their new gear. We figured out the route Ingvar was going to take home, by metro, since Nico would go home with his friend, then we headed out. I really wanted to try a Dortmund tradition, stößchen. Which is a super little beer, in a cute cup. It was a tradition stared by a bar next to a train stop, where the owner started selling little beers people could finish before getting on their train. We went to one of the main squares of town, right next to this church I wanted to see, too, called St. Reinold’s. The square was so cute, I definitely could have spent more time there. Tons of Dortmund and Barcelona fans were decked out in the square, getting food and beer before the big game. It was a big game because the teams rarely play each other, it was the first game of the Champion League, and Barcelona is one of the best teams in the world.

Nico realized he forgot one of his jackets in Ingvar’s backpack, so he decided to take the metro back to our place and grab it. It was actually pretty crazy, every time we were on the metro, we tried to buy a ticket, and the machines kept malfunctioning! It was wild. Ingvar and I sat down outside in Alter Markt, and got some food while Nico was going back. Unfortunately, since it was a game day, they weren’t selling the little beers, wahhh, what a bummer! Oh, well. Ingvar and I each had a beer and shared some food. I got pork wiener snitzel and Ingvar got sausage. It was really tasty! German food is good, but really heavy and filling. Nico made it back when we were finishing dinner, anxious to go to the game. We all took some pictures then headed to the station. Ingvar and Nico went to the stadium, Signal Iduna Park, while I managed to actually buy a ticket back to our stop. I was so excited for them to go to the game! They were gonna have a blast. I said goodbye to Nico, it was really good to meet him! I’m happy that Ingvar got to spend time with him after all the years apart.

I rode the four stops to our street, then walked the five minutes to our Airbnb. It was about 7:30, so not dark yet, and the neighborhood felt pretty safe. When I got to our door, I actually couldn’t get the lock to unlock! I was a little worried, since my phone was at less than 20% battery, but thankfully it eventually turned. Phew! When I got inside, I realized the WiFi wasn’t working, which was a bummer. I messed around with the router, but couldn’t figure it out. Eventually I turned on the data on my phone. I took a bath and talked to Mom on the phone for a half hour, which was so nice! The bath felt so good after running around for the last few days! I spent the evening lounging around and doing some self care, like clipping my nails and rubbing lotion on my achy feet.

Ingvar came back around 12:20 that night/morning. I had the bedroom window open, since it was street side, so he called out to me when he arrived, since we only had one set of keys. We brushed our teeth and called it a night. Ingvar told me about the game, which needed in a tie, 0-0. A tie this early on in the season is okay, and it’s especially okay, since Barcelona is such a good team! Ingvar got to see Messi play, one of the best players in the world. And I was proud of him for getting back to the Airbnb on public transport alone. :]