#at the blink of an eye a normal pregnancy can turn into an emergency
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zimshan · 1 month ago
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say it with me now
it’s not “pro-life”
it’s “forced birth”
and any government who can force someone to give birth?
can also force someone to be sterilized.
(do you hear that, “save the babies” crowd? you hear that men?)
do you want a government deciding whether you are worthy enough to procreate?
no? then you don’t want to give a government the power to force people to give birth.
it’s the same right. it’s bodily autonomy. your right to decide what happens to your body.
if you want to have a child
if you don’t want to have a child
the overturning of roe affects you
it means ob/gyn practices caring more about breaking laws than practicing medicine
it means distrust and suspicion among ob/gyn healthcare teams (at a time of already high burnout thanks to the pandemic)
that means less safe healthcare
that means higher maternal mortality rates
thats real women dying
what on earth is “pro-life” about that?
call “prolifers” what they are: pro–forced birth.
they are for governments forcing people to give birth.
government-mandated birth.
even if it kills you.
the real death panels.
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imrowanartist · 6 months ago
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@pricegazweek Day 1 - & how many times have you loved me without my asking? How often have I loved a thing because you loved it? including me.
Snippet of What Else We May Become, Part 2
Tags: Trans pregnancy / fluff / mild body image issues & dysphoria
_
The fact that Kyle wakes up slowly when John enters their bedroom is a testament to the exhaustion his partner has been experiencing lately.
Normally, Kyle would wake up at the smallest of sounds, would probably have been alert and out of bed the moment John stuck his key in the lock of the front door. But now John can see Kyle blink open his heavy eyes, registering there’s a presence in the bedroom with a slow exhale. He moves to sit up and John gestures at him to stay as he pulls back the covers to get in bed himself. 
“Didn’t mean to wake you,” he mumbles, but Kyle shakes his head at him with a soft smile.
“Gotta pee anyway,” he says, then drags himself out of bed with a soft sigh.
Something tells John that this has been becoming a more regular occurrence. He settles on the bed and pulls out his phone to see if Simon has confirmed his safe return to Glasgow yet.
Kyle goes for the bathroom, but suddenly stops at their bedroom door, causing John to look up. He smiles when Kyle pads back to him, pressing a kiss on his lips.
“Hi. I missed you,” Kyle greets softly, before turning around again, “Now I really have to go pee.”
John watches him go with a grin then his phone vibrates in his hand and a message comes in.
-Home - is all it says. Not like Ghost will admit he spends most of his leave time in Scotland with Soap these days. But John pretends to play along with the ruse until Simon is ready to admit he might as well give up the lease on his flat in Manchester. John confirms the message with a thumbs-up emoji. Who says he refuses to go along with the times?
He looks up when Kyle re-enters the bedroom, stretching his arms above his head as he yawns widely. The shirt he’s wearing rides up and for a moment, John catches sight of what is now unmistakably an emerging baby bump leading up from below the edge of his boxers. To someone who doesn’t know Kyle it doesn’t look like much yet, just some normal healthy body fat instead of a toned abdomen, but to John, it’s so obvious.
Kyle catches him staring and looks down in confusion as he drops his arms. “What?” he says, then realizes what John is looking at. “Oh, yeah, she finally decided to show herself.”
He steps closer to the bed and pulls up his shirt, showing off his stomach to John. Poking out over the waistband of Kyle’s boxers and going up to his belly button with a soft arch, there is now a visible bump. Small still, but it’s there and it definitely happened while John was gone the past few weeks.
“Can I…?” he asks with one hand raised, searching Kyle’s face for permission.
There’s a moment of hesitation in his partner’s eyes, and John has trouble deciphering exactly why. Unease maybe, but not with him he thinks. 
“Yeah…” Kyle says, and John waits until he confirms it with a nod. Then he traces his fingers across Kyle’s skin before softly settling his hand on the bump. It feels warm under his hand and softer than the firm abs he’s used to. There’s no movement yet, but the warmth it radiates still sends a flash of excitement through John.
“This is…” he mumbles, trailing off as he’s unable to form the right words to describe his current feelings.
“Real now?” Kyle supplies, his voice rough, and John looks up to find his partner’s eyes shiny.
“Yes,” he says, retracting his hand and watching Kyle drop the shirt and sit beside him on the bed. “How are you feeling about it?”
Kyle hums thoughtfully, leaning in closer until they’re shoulder to shoulder. John has missed him, more than he’d like to admit. It still feels strange to lead what’s left of the 141 without him.
“Honestly?” Kyle starts, voice soft, “It’s exciting, but also…terrifying. Watching my body change. I don’t…enjoy it? But I do want what’s at the end of it, so I guess I’ll sit through it anyway…”
It makes sense, that he has complicated feelings about it. John can’t even begin to imagine the journey Kyle has been through with his gender identity, and then to go through something that is still widely seen as exclusively female must be incredibly difficult for him.
“Hmm.”
“That’s all? Hmm?” Kyle snorts, bumping his shoulder into John’s.
“Well, I can’t say I understand what you’re going through now, can I? As much as I want to.” John defends himself. He’s never been particularly good at expressing himself, at showing sympathy in other ways than actions. Kyle doesn’t say anything for a moment, and when John looks at him he finds him lost in thought.
“Kyle?” he asks, worried that he’s said the wrong thing.
Kyle sighs and his shoulders drop as he refuses to look at John. His breathing is measured and John recognises it as his way to gather his thoughts. 
“I’ll look so different soon,” Kyle says eventually, his tone soft and hesitant, “It kinda freaks me out. I’m scared I won’t recognise myself. And that you…won’t find me attractive anymore.”
John has to blink a few times. At the ludicrous idea that he’ll ever find Kyle no longer attractive. 
“Kyle,” he repeats, more forceful this time. He waits until Kyle meets his eyes. “Remember when we spent three weeks in that jungle in Bolivia, without access to clean clothes and running water? We were both disgusting and smelled terrible, but I still thought you were the most handsome man I’d ever seen.”
Despite the tears in his eyes, Kyle huffs a laugh. “Yeah, that was bad. God, I felt disgusting. I think I showered three times in a row when we got back.”
“See? I have seen you in much worse conditions, sweetheart.”
“Really now?”
John huffs at Kyle's cheeky grin.
“Seeing you like this, seeing our baby grow? You’ve never looked more attractive to me,“ he assures Kyle, "And don't worry," he reaches out, settling his hand on Kyle's stomach again, longing to feel his partner and their baby. "This is making me a bloody mess as well."
“You’ll make me cry,” Kyle grumbles with a sniffle, covering John’s hand with his own. “I hate that everything makes me fucking cry now. Another thing she’s doing to me-“
John doesn’t let him finish, leaning in to press their lips together instead. He can taste the salt of Kyle’s tears as his partner sighs into the kiss. God, he has missed him. So bloody much.
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cowgurrrl · 2 years ago
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Rockstar Joel Miller finding out he’s going to be a dad again ✨pretty please ✨
It’s not that you weren’t trying, but you definitely didn’t think it would ever happen. Maybe you’re on set and you pass out after a particularly strenuous day and they call your emergency contact (Joel) on the way to the hospital. When you get there, they run all the tests and give you fluids to make sure that you’re healthy and Joel is there by the time you wake up. He holds your hand and makes sure that you know that he’s right there with you, no matter what the results are. When the doctor comes in with an official looking clipboard and a nurse carting in some equipment behind him, he announces happily, “Well, it looks like you just had a little dizzy spell. You probably just need to drink some more water and maybe an iron supplement. All your vitals are normal and you and the baby are totally healthy.” And you and Joel blink at the doctor, your heart suddenly going a million miles an hour. “Did you… not know that you’re pregnant?” “Does this look like the face of someone who knows she’s pregnant?” You ask. Your mind is going five thousand directions all at once as the nurse says something about doing an ultrasound. The second you see the tiny peanut shaped blob on the screen, everything else fades away. She says something about the baby looking great for ten weeks and that they are developing normally.
When you and Joel are finally alone again, you turn to tell him that you’re sorry, you didn’t know, you can fix this, it’s okay, but he beats you to it. He wraps his arms around you and holds you, a few tears falling from his eyes and onto your neck. “We’re gonna have a baby,” he says. Once you get over the initial shock, you go through a million different emotions. Happiness because you and Joel are going to have a baby. Frustration and guilt because you’ve definitely been drinking and doing god knows what else but you didn’t know you were pregnant. Fear of how being pregnant/having a baby could affect your career. Things were just starting to fall into place and you weren’t sure if you were ready to give it all up but Joel assured you that he would never make you give up your career and you two would figure it out.
You two keep the pregnancy a secret for as long as you can, only telling the really important people in your lives about it. Sarah and Ellie are ecstatic if not a little worried for both of your sanities. It isn’t until you are about six months pregnant that you feel comfortable telling the world. You join Joel on a red carpet for one of your mutual friend’s TV show premieres and you wear a beautiful flowing gown that accentuates your baby bump and Joel stands proudly next to you with a hand on your stomach. All night, you each field questions about the baby. “How far along are you?” “Do you know what you’re having?” “How long have you known?” “What did your girls think about this news?”
You are a little more reserved in your answers, wanting to keep some things for yourself. You lie about not knowing the gender and keep your due date thinly veiled. “We aren’t sure what we’re having yet, but I know the girls have bet money on us having another girl. Everyone’s very happy and healthy and we’ll have a baby in our arms come summer.” Everyone congratulates you and wishes you a healthy delivery which is very sweet. You interrupt Joel doing an interview with a different reporter by kissing him on the cheek and wrapping an arm around his middle, cutting him off mid thought. His hand rests on your bump again and he smirks as he looks at the reporter. “I did that.” He says, and you smack his arm almost immediately.
The next day, flowers flood your kitchen with well wishes from costars, producers, other people in the music industry, and even the Russo brothers who you’ve never worked with but you know they were eyeing you for an upcoming film. You feel so loved and cherished and you know that you and Joel can face whatever is next as long as you have each other.
Bonus: instagram story posts during your pregnancy 🫶
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damndaehyung · 1 year ago
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Regency Emerald
9 months before the wedding. 
Daniel had a bad feeling that something was going to go wrong today. He had tried to stay home, assuring Tyler that he could just reschedule this audition but his fiancée was hearing none of it and practically pushed him out of the house. 
He shouldn’t have gone though and that point was proven by the fact one Tara Lee stood in their foyer. Sure it could be a regular visitor but ever since she revealed her condition it was risky to be around her brother. One wrong move and she could become a widow. 
“Hello,” Daniel greeted her.  “Is everything okay?”  he asked wondering why she hadn’t gone straight in, even with wedding-induced mood swings and Mark-induced murderous thoughts Tara would be fine, she was his precious little sister. “You know you can go in, Tyler includes you in every security update,” he added. 
“I know, I am just catching my breath,” she said. Pregnancy, Daniel would never understand why any woman would put herself through that.  “Tyler called saying he had an emergency,” she said. “Is he okay?” she asked. 
Daniel frowned, an emergency? Was he hurt? Did something happen?  he didn’t get any updates. No texts. No calls. Hell, he didn’t even get an owl. He avoided eye contact with Tara, it was embarrassing that he didn’t know what was happening. He didn’t want to confirm that to her. “Maybe we should just go in.” Daniel offered. Opening the door to Tyler’s apartment. 
He had no idea what he was walking into, it could be something serious or it could be wedding related. Even the last wedding-induced emergency led Daniel to find the house completely turned on its head, furniture floating around, and Tyler’s dragons laying beside a very still wedding planner. He did not expect to see Tyler and his mother having tea in the sitting room, not even a cushion out of place. 
 “Tyler, is everything okay? You sounded upset when you called?” Tara asked. Daniel looked from his fiancée who was the picture of tranquillity to Tyler’s mother whose grey eyes narrowed at him. Daniel blinked, she normally wasn’t fond of him but usually waited to Tyler was out of the room to be openly hostile. 
“Of course he was,” Amelia Fawley Wu answered placing her cup down and standing up. If looks could kill Daniel would be dead but now, and oddly enough he thinks Tara would as well. “My baby was suffering due to other people's mediocrity and their stupidity,”  she said. Despite not moving from where he sat, Tyler reacted his grip tightening on his teacup, taking in a breath he nodded. “And where were you two?” she snapped.
“Mother, we’ve been through this,” Tyler finally spoke. “Tara was busy, I understand that, my niece or nephew is important,”  he said. Daniel tried not to judge because healthy family dynamics were never his forte but he would think Tara being pregnant would be enough for her mother to cut her some slack. Not because the child that was leeching her life force would be related to Tyler.  “And I didn’t call Daniel, he had an audition for a dream role, i didn’t want anything distracting him,” he said. 
“Sweetie, you aren’t a distraction,” Tyler’s mother cooed, rubbing her son's shoulders lovingly. Once again Daniel received a withering glare. “Daniel,” she said coolly, “why would my son feel he is a distraction? Is this not your wedding as well? Why is my son doing all the work?”
“Mom,” Tyler said placing his cup down. “I know you are only doing this because you care but that isn’t what i meant and Daniel has been helping with our wedding, it's not his fault other people don’t understand how important even the most minute detail is important,” he said eyes darkening with every word. 
“Right,” Daniel spoke. “How about we go talk? And we let Tara sit down, i don’t know much about pregnant women but i am pretty sure all this rushing around and standing must be hard for her right now,” he said. He was pretty sure Celeste mentioned something about finding it hard to stand for long amounts of time while she was pregnant. 
Tyler sighed but nodded, “Fine,” he huffed, not looking Daniel in the eyes. Well, that wasn’t good. “And Tara if you aren’t feeling well go lie down, we have plenty of room for you here, how about you just stay here for a little bit -” Tyler started. 
“Yes, i am sure my husband,” Tara started but quickly realized her mistake. Like always any alluding to Mark triggered something in Tyler who Daniel was pretty sure about to destroy something. 
“Okay let's go,”  Daniel said moving to Tyler quickly and ushering out into the hallway. “Let’s not murder anyone, darling, as pretty as you are even you couldn’t pull off prison wear,” he said.
 “We both know that is a lie Daniel, I can make anything look good,” Tyler huffed. “And i wasn’t even thinking of murdering someone,” he said. 
Daniel snorted. “Sure you weren’t, it's not like i haven’t caught you telling your dragons to eat Mark on site,” he pointed out to Tyler who rolled his eyes in response. 
“I’d never risk their diet like that,” he said. 
“Right,”  Daniel, “So should we talk about this emergency? I wish you would have at least messaged me, when Tara said there was an emergency I imagined the worst,” he said. 
“So cute,” Tyler cooed. “I didn’t message because i did not want anything to mess up your audition,” he said pointedly. “Why you had to audition and just didn’t get given the role i will never understand but i didn’t want anything to mess it up, I wanted you to be so good that the director regretted wasting his time even thinking about anyone else.” 
If possible Daniel's heart grew even fonder, “I love you and if your family wasn’t here i would show you just how much but they are so what happened? I hate that something that is meant to be a happy occasion is causing you so much stress,” he said. 
Tyler pouted. “We could have just talked about how much you love me, its one of my favourite subjects you know.”  
“I’ll wax poetic about you once we get it sorted,” Daniel said as Tyler rolled his eyes muttering a fine fine and grabbing his hand dragging him to his study. 
“They are on the desk,” Tyler said. “They are horrible, I  don’t want to look at them again, it’s bad enough seeing it once but now you are going to know our wedding is ruined -” he said. “Just go look,” he said. “I’ll wait out here.
There was a small part of Daniel that wanted to laugh at Tyler’s dramatic but there was an even tinier part of him that worried Tyler wasn’t being dramatic and something did go wrong. It didn’t matter as much to Daniel, he would marry Tyler regardless of whether there was a wedding or not but he knew Tyler wanted it to be perfect. Looking at the box, he was confused. There were place cards and they looked perfectly fine, maybe they spelled someone's name wrong. Daniel started to go through each of them checking.
“Horrible right?” Tyler said poking his head inside before coming in. “In what world is that Regency Emerald?” he asked. Oh, the colour wasn’t right, Daniel remembered Tyler asking about three colours that were all the same. He was guessing some used the wrong one. “I am so sorry,” he said. Daniel frowned even though he couldn’t tell the difference this mattered to Tyler.
“There is nothing to apologize for,” Daniel kissing the top of Tyler’s head. “It’s okay, it can be fixed,” he said. “How about you go relax with your girls, I am sure Tara is cursing us for leaving her alone for so long,”
“My mom is with her,” Tyler said. That is exactly what Daniel meant, alone with their mother though he couldn’t say or Tyler would be offended. “We could just stay up here for a little while, silencing charms and all,” he said with a grin.
“We could but i know you want to hear all about Tara’s doctor appointment and we both know we have like a minute before your mother shows up and thinks i have upset you even more,” he said. 
“She is just being protective,” Tyler frowned. “She just went into protective mom mood when she saw i was upset, I couldn’t even handle firing that incompetent colour-blind -”
Daniel could only imagine how that went and he was forever thankful that they had all their staff sign NDA’s but he might send their wedding planner of a goodie bag just to smooth things over. “I am glad she was here then,” he said. Trying not to grimace, he was thankful she had showed up for Tyler but he would never be glad to be in her presence.  “Now you head downstairs and be a good host, I’ll be down in a minute,” Tyler rolled his eyes. 
“Don’t be too upset about those,” Tyler said, eyes full of hatred as he looked at the box. It was saying something when he was pretty sure not even Sungjae Lee inspired such hatred from Tyler.
Tyler turned on his heels, Daniel waited a minute to make sure he was no longer around before pulling out his phone out.
“Celeste i know we had a deal about no wedding-related requests but technically i am calling for your connections,” he spoke immediately but got no response. “Celeste?” he said after a minute before giggling, a distinctly childish giggle and muffled noise in the background. 
“Calli why do you have mummy’s phone who did you call?” He heard Caleb say before a muffled noise. “Daniel? I am sorry about Calli must have stole Celeste’s phone, I hope she didn’t cause too much trouble, she is teething and -”
“Cal, I called - is Celeste around?” he asked rather curtly. Usually, he’d pretend that he was interested in Calliope’s growth at least to humour one of his oldest friends but right now he was calling on important business. 
“Rude and she is, you better not be stressing my wife out Choi,” Caleb said before calling out for Celeste.
“Daniel, Hey, how did the audition go? Do you think you got it?” Celeste asked. “If not i have had a pretty big offer that i think is just up your alley,” she said. Daniel raised an eyebrow momentarily distracted.
 “Yeah i think good, Pierce doesn’t really show any emotions so it's hard to gauge but i did my best,” he said wincing at how cliched he sounded. “And you can tell me about this other role later i need a favour,”
“Daniel we said no wedding talk, i am not your personal assistant,” she said. Daniel rolled his eyes, that was debatable. 
“I just need a favour -” he said. “And you don’t have to do anything but give me names and numbers -” he said. 
Celeste sighed. “Say what you want and i’ll decide if i want to help you,” she said. 
Daniel twirled the place card around in his hand. To him it looked good, he had used the right hex code and made sure to say Regency Emerald fifteen times so Celeste’s printer friend could get it right. “Ty -” he called out, his fiance was still in the living room making plans with his sister. Apparently, he was concerned with her diet, she still had a cup of coffee and according to Tyler, that was unacceptable so he was now recommending her a new dietitian. “Could i borrow you for a second,” 
“Daniel, i really think Tara should stay -” he started. “What is that?” he asked eyes darting from the card in his hand to the box in the other. 
“Well, i tried to fix them. Celeste knew someone in New York and you know magical deliveries are much better - “ he started and they should be for the price he paid. 
Tyler took the card from Daniel’s hand eyeing critically. “So that is what you were doing?” Tyler asked as Daniel nodded. 
“They are perfect,” Tyler said after a second breaking into a smile. “You didn’t have to do all this though,” he said. Daniel couldn’t help but roll his eyes.
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after-witch · 4 years ago
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Baby Mine [Yandere Overhaul x Reader]
Title: Baby Mine [Yandere Overhaul x Reader]
Synopsis:  The first time you laid eyes on your child, you knew: You had to get out. Set in the ‘White Picket Fence’-verse. 
For request: Something with Overhaul + the reader’s children and manipulation (I’m sorry I accidentally deleted the original message so I don’t remember the exacting wording!)
Word Count: 3328
notes: yandere, stockholm syndrome, abuse
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From the instant you laid eyes on your daughter, the moment your gaze took in her fresh, wet skin and her small, blinking, uncomprehending eyes, you knew: you had to get the fuck away from Chisaki Kai.
The realization was instant, like a flash, peeling away years of manipulation and training and forced self-acceptance of your situation. Years of justifications and excuses that had wormed their way under your skin, forcing you to see the bright side, to see his side, and let yourself get wrapped up in its candy-coated, fluffy cotton bullshit--gone, ripped away with brutal, exacting force. All that was left was the stark realization, a single driving force shoving you forward: you and your daughter were going to get out.
That was four years ago.
Four years of agonizing pretending. Of forcing yourself to put back on the coat you'd worn before, the false version of yourself that loved him and accepted him and excused everything he ever did to you. It was hard. It was harder to pretend that you accepted this than to actually accept it, to indulge in his control. But every time your resolve weakened, it only took a glance at your child to remind you of why you couldn't just give in.
You had to get out, not for yourself, but for her. To give her a normal life. A life where she could be free, where she could have friends, where she could run outside and not be limited to the house or, if the weather was nice, the secure, high-fenced backyard that Kai had only built within the last year.
Four years of pretending. Four years of planning. And, most difficult of all, four years of waiting. Trust was not easily given by Chisaki Kai, even to the mother of his child.
So you waited.
You waited for Kai to move you two--no, three now--into a house, a real house; not in a populated suburb (another broken promise that you swallowed deep, deep down) but an offshoot of some protected compound in a remote area, where it could be secure and guarded. But what mattered is that its doors connected to the outside, not to some unknown underground bunker.  You could manage, if you were connected to the outside.
You waited for Kai to ease up on the restrictions that built up around you during your pregnancy, rules to keep you under a far more watchful eye, rules that made it harder to find a way out. Inches of trust, gradually earned, which made it possible for you to think concretely about escape.
You waited for your daughter to get old enough to run, old enough to survive without needing to be fed every few hours, old enough to know how to stay quiet when told. Watching her grow up only made you want to leave, more. She had a personality now. Stubborn but accepting when she knew she wouldn’t win; sweet in her own way, an unusual way, likely one that came from a lack of interaction with anyone but her parents and a handful of trusted Shie Hassaikai members.
It was one of those trusted members--you never have learned their name, a secret Kai (nor they) were willing to give--that would be your key to escape.
 They loved your daughter, too, in time. They were drawn in by her precociousness, her insistence on formalities and pleases and thank-yous. But it was her bubbliness and inherent interest in the world and people around her that made them decide to love her, too.Her big eyes and bubbling laugh when you two were allowed in the yard, sometimes under this member’s supervision. 
To your daughter’s delight, they didn’t simply watch you like the handful of others did; they joined in the fun. Just a few weeks ago, she’d convinced him to push her so high on the swing set that she’d gone all the way around--even your heart briefly froze until she’d emerged on the other side, cackling with delight, safe and sound.
They were loyal to Overhaul. Of that there was no doubt. Had they killed for him? Maimed? Tortured? You tried not to think about the things that were done in Overhaul’s name.
Yet they’d betrayed him, all for the sake of your daughter. Part of you feels bitter that they wouldn’t betray him for the sake of you--but then, what was that saying? Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.
It was with their help that you were finally able to secure that last necessary piece of the puzzle for your escape: getting out of the secured, monitored gate surrounding the house unnoticed. He told you in hushed, intense tones that he would be on watch duty the night of your escape, that he would take care of the other member assigned that night, and that all you had to do was get out the door at the agreed time with your bag, your daughter, and a good pair of walking shoes. He would drive you as far as he could, and then you two would run, run, run after that.
It was going to work. Your daughter was going to live her life, a real life, not one carefully constructed in captivity. What would you do first, once you were free? The thoughts sometimes made you so giddy that you pinched yourself to calm down. So close, so close to the finish line, and you must be vigilant.
Tonight. You and your daughter are going to leave tonight.
Your daughter is in her bed, tucked in safe and secure. Her eyes are already closed, and Kai is sitting at the edge of the mattress, as always, smoothing down her hair and pressing a chaste kiss to her forehead. You watch from the doorway with your arms casually crossed, a small, tired, end-of-the-night smile on your lips. It's all so normal, so domestic, isn't it.
"Good night," he says, so soft and sweet that, if you hadn't been pulled out of your deluded coping mechanism, you might find it endearing. Instead, your thoughts scream: This will be the last time you ever see her, you fucked up piece of shit bastard. Oh, do you have a potty mouth when your 'husband' can't hear you...
He leaves your daughter to her dreams and clicks off the little lamp on her nightstand. When he crosses the doorway, you make room and he lets you slide your arm around his, linking yourselves together for the walk to your shared bedroom.
"Tired?" He asks, and you nod. You are tired. Not for the reasons he thinks, and not for the reasons you'll give, but the telltale darkness under your eyes belies the stress of planning your escape from a years-long ordeal.
You sigh, as soft and sweet as his voice was earlier. "Mmhmm. She didn't want to focus on her lessons today. I got a bit frustrated. Sometimes I don't think I'm cut out to be a teacher." By now you're in your bedroom and you casually take off your day clothes, dropping them in the labeled hamper in front of the closet. Your stomach twinges with the memory of how he used to look away when you took off your clothes.
But that was long ago, and now he continues the conversation casually as the pair of you strip and change into your respective pajamas. You slip a pink nightie with ruffled bottom over your head as he
"You just need more practice. Are you reading the lesson books before you start class?"
I wouldn't have to read any lesson books if you let her out of this house, if you let her out of school, if you weren't--you stop your thoughts, afraid that they might show on your face. Afraid that you might lose everything at this last, crucial moment.
But you know you look frustrated, so you roll with it. "Yes," you say, voice just the right amount of annoyed in retort. "But if she doesn't want to sit down and focus, me reading the lesson beforehand isn't really going to help, is it?"
He stares at you, and you wonder in a flash if you went too far. But in the next moment, he's simply continuing to button up his shirt. "Is it going to help our daughter learn if you take out your bad day on your husband?" His voice is dripping with the natural condescension that once had you questioning whether or not it was okay to be upset that he'd kidnapped you, and you hate it. But at least it's a sign that he bought your excuses.
You feel a warm flush of shame at the way his condescension still makes you feel less-than. You slide yourself into bed, under the covers, instinctively grabbing the book on your end table and staring down into it like you could simply disappear inside the pages. You can't mess up anything right now. The weight of what you need to do tonight feels so heavy and you can't stop your hands from trembling slightly.
"Sorry," you whisper, voice thick with emotion. "It's just hard sometimes. I feel in over my head."
It's Kai's turn to slide under the covers, though he doesn't bother grabbing his own book. Instead he gently pushes on your hands until you set the book on the covers. You know he wants you to look at him, so you do. He looks so gentle, so calm. Did he kill anyone today? Did he insult some hapless victim who crossed his organization, spewing venom with his words, before kissing your daughter goodnight hours later?
His gloved hands tip your chin up and it's a familiar feeling, an intimate feeling, when he pulls you in for a kiss. When he pulls away, he's smiling softly, indulgently. You aren't in trouble. You're good.
"I'll come home for lessons tomorrow and see what I can do. Would you like that?"
I'd like you to drop dead and make this easier on us, you think.
"Yes, Kai."
You smile. You nod. You let out a shaky sigh and lean your shoulders against his, picking up your book and signaling an end to the crisis. He lets you read quietly for a while before turning off the lamp on his side of the bed; it's a wordless signal that you already know: time to sleep. You're a dutiful wife and you put your book away and turn off your lamp and then turn back to your husband and whisper,
"Good night, Kai."
**
You wait until he's deep asleep to ease your way out of the bed. Every step you take in your padded socks makes you cringe. Will the floor creak? Will you make too much noise? Will you have to come up with a half-assed excuse as he comes to, groggily asking what you're doing? You feel like you can't breathe, but you do breathe, soft and shallow as you make your way to the bedroom door.
 You didn't dare keep anything related to your escape in your shared bedroom. The door feels like it weighs a thousand pounds as you ever-so-slowly open it, keeping your head turned towards the man sleeping on the bed all the while. He doesn't stir. He simply continues to snore, even as the door opens enough for you to slip out.
Your heart is pounding in your chest as you cross the hallway and into the spare room that you used as a playroom and, lately, a makeshift school. The bag you packed is in the closet, tucked behind bags of school supplies that you'd asked Kai to pick up in order to make sure that your escape bag didn't stand out. You grab it swiftly, along with your daughter's outdoor shoes, and make your way to the most dangerous element of your escape: your daughter's room.
She did so well. You remind yourself to praise her once you're away from the house, once you're in a car and making noise isn't a life or death dilemma. You built up the idea of your escape bit by bit over the past few weeks. You couldn't tell her that her father was a monster who kidnapped you, but you could prey on her desire to see more, to go beyond the rules established in her father's domain.
Don't you want to meet other kids? Go to the beach, feel the sand underneath your feet? Meet... your grandma? We'll just take a secret trip, you and me, and then come back to Papa when we're done. Then he'll see that it's safe to leave and come with us next time. But you have to keep it a secret. You can't tell him a thing, or we won't be able to go. You can keep a secret, can't you?
You kneel next to your daughter's bed and gently wake her up, whispering her name and stroking her hair, so she slowly opens her eyes in confusion before her gaze lands on your face and ah, a smile--it's just mom.
"Mama?" She asks, a bit too loudly for your liking.
"Shh baby," you say. "Yes, it's mama. Are you ready to go?" You see the tentativeness, the childish confusion in the way she nods. She doesn't know what real life is yet, she doesn't have an inkling of the freedom that she's lost, but she will.
You don't bother changing. You have a pair of clothes in the bag and you'll change when you're in a safer space. For now, you take her hand and lead her down the staircase, your chest tightening with every step. You can't help but glance back at the still-open doorway leading to your bedroom. You pray to whatever is listening that he won't wake up. Each step is a step closer to freedom. Each step is a terrifying risk that you or she might slip, might make noise, might wake him up.
Your spirits lift when you reach the bottom of the stairs. All you have to do is get out the door and he'll be waiting there with the key and a getaway car and freedom.
You clutch your daughter's hand, your own palm now sweaty; you nearly trip on a toy you forgot to pick up earlier, but thankfully the light in the entryway was turned on (you must have forgotten to turn it off) and you see it just in time to avoid disaster. You squeeze your daughter hand and turn the corner that leads to the entryway of your home--
Where Chisaki Kai is standing, waiting for you, his eyes practically illuminated by the glowing lamp light.
You drop the bag.
"No," you say. "No." Your mind suddenly feels fuzzy, like its buzzing, drowning out all of your thoughts with a pure denial of what you see in front of you.
"How--how did you--" you sputter, unable to continue voicing your question. It was all planned. It was all practiced. You pretended, you waited, you planned--for four years. How? How did he know?
He doesn't have to answer. You know the moment that your daughter's grip slips out of your hand and she runs up to her father, feet thumping on the floor. She clings to his side and doesn't look at you, and he runs a hand through her hair without taking his eyes away from your shaking form.
Of course she told him. Of course she told her papa that you wanted to leave. She loved him. Why wouldn't she? It was all she'd ever known. You were breaking the rules, breaking the structure that dominated her life since she could remember. 
"Please don't be mad at me, mama." Your daughter whimpers against Kai, and you can hear the tears in her little voice, and your heart aches for her in so many ways.
"I'm not," you whisper. "I'm not mad at you, baby." You're just sad, so sad. It hurts. All of it.
"Sweetheart," Kai says, voice surprisingly calm despite the events, "go back to bed while I help your mother unpack your things, all right?"
Your daughter nods and suddenly she's against you, hugging you in a tight, childish way; you only have enough energy to pull your arm around her, limp and heavy, patting her back without really feeling it before she scampers up the stairs.
You're left alone. With him.
He approaches you slowly and you feel like an animal. There's wildness hammering in your heart and the thought comes up, unwillingly: could you still run? Escape on your own? And hope that some day, your daughter escapes and finds you? But the thought of leaving her behind is impossible to indulge in for more than a second, and you know that without her, your life isn't worth living. The thought of abandoning her to Kai Chisaki brings up an immediate sense of revulsion and guilt and shame.
"What were you thinking?"
You aren't looking at him, but you don't have to be looking at him to know that he's glaring at you. Looking down on you with his gaze filled with righteous justifications. You glance and--yes, he is, but there's something darker, something you’d forgotten, underneath. Your stomach suddenly feels loaded with weights and your legs move backwards, pulling you away from him, away from the anger that feels like it's radiating off him in waves.
He suddenly grips your chin with brutal force and yanks your jaw forward, forcing you to look at him.
"I had to kill one of my most trusted men today because of your..." His eyes dart back and forth for a moment, before he spits out the apparently perfect description of your escape attempt. "Hysteria. An absolute waste of potential, all because of your ridiculousness."
Your mouth is dry. Your voice is hoarse. But you speak up, anyway. You've already lost everything.
"It's not ridiculous to want to get out of here." 
The weight of the years seems to press down on your shoulders, pounding into your bones, screaming in your ears. 
"It's not ridiculous to--to want to take my daughter away from the man who kidnapped me and forced me to pretend like I was happy here, like I was happy living in some--" you cough, needing moisture, but not daring to stop to swallow lest you lose your courage. "--glorified dollhouse while you tell me what to do and what to wear and how to act and when to fuck you and when to have a baby and fuck you, fuck you, just fuck you Kai. I hate you. Oh I fucking hate you."
You don't notice as your voice gets louder, emboldened by the adrenaline that's been crashing through you since you opened the bedroom door, until his hand is gripping your upper arm in a show of brute, vise-length strength.
"Lower. your. voice." 
His grip strengthens until you cry out, and then it gradually loosens without letting you go completely.
For the next few moments, you do nothing but stare at one another. Your mind feels hazy, darting from thought to thought. It was all for nothing. The last four years, all for nothing. But you think about your daughter, about what she may have been able to accomplish outside of these walls, and even the fantasy of a free life for her made it worth something--didn't it?
It's his voice that lowered, now, as he lets you go completely and straightens himself up. All business now. But what business will he engage in, this time?
"Perhaps you do need a vacation," he says, finally. Firmly. He's made a decision.
You wonder if he's lost his mind and you're about to ask as much before he continues.
"Did you know this house has a secret room? It's nice and quiet. The perfect place for you to recuperate until you've regained your senses."
The room, the room, the room.
Your hand instinctively claps against your mouth as you cry out.
After all, you don't want to wake your daughter up with your screams.
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homoose · 3 years ago
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Love Has a Learning Curve: epilogue (reader)
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Summary: An early morning, a doctor’s appointment, a new beginning.
Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!reader
Category: fluff
Warnings/Includes: pregnancy (including like… probably incorrect math and science but my degree was in English and this is fanfiction okay)
Word count: 2.7k
a/n: I’m actually so emotional don’t look at me thanks ♥️
Series Masterlist
———
The sound of Spencer’s ringtone pierced through the early morning quiet, shrill and disconsolate. Y/N hummed against his chest, shifting as he clumsily reached across to the bedside table to answer it. 
“Hey,” he croaked, voice still smothered in sleep. “Mm... When?” He paused, and she could almost make out the answer on the other end. “Got it. Yeah.” 
He carefully set the phone back on the bedside table, and then his arms came around her shoulders. He let out a long sigh, the one she’d gotten quite used to over the last year and a half— the one that meant he had to go. She squeezed him around the middle and let out her own sigh. “Case?”
“Yeah.” He ran light fingers down her arm. “Jet’s taking off in ninety minutes.”
She glanced at the bedside table to the alarm clock that read 4:57am. They both knew he needed to leave within the next half hour if he was going to make it on time, but neither one made any effort to move. Instead, they breathed together in the pre-dawn stillness— a single moment of peace before the world and all its ugliness could crash through the fortress they’d constructed around their space and around each other.
“I don’t wanna go,” he whispered. 
“I know.” She pressed a kiss over his heart through his t-shirt. “I know.”
“I’m gonna miss everything,” he lamented. “Appointments, and milestones, and firsts, and I— I’m gonna miss all of it.”
She lifted her head at the tears in his voice. “Hey.” She shifted in the circle of his arms to prop herself up on his chest. “You’re not gonna miss all of it. You’ll miss this one appointment. And it’s— it’s not even an important one,” she assured, gentle fingers swiping away the lone tear that had managed to escape over his lash line. 
“Yes, it is.” He shook his head. “They're all important.”
She gave him a sympathetic smile, leaning forward to press a quick peck to his lips before sitting up and deciding to reassure him in the only way she knew how. “Okay, doctor. Eleven weeks. Tell me what we’re gonna find out today.” 
She pulled him up out of bed, interlacing their fingers and pressing their shoulders together. As she led him to the bathroom, he explained, “Dr. Layton will do the first ultrasound, and Baby will look more like a baby now. At around ten weeks they made the transition from embryo to fetus. They’ll be about two inches long.” 
She handed him his toothbrush and turned to grab his toiletry go-back from the linen closet, stifling a yawn. “Mmhm. What else?”
“Did you know they’re breathing now?” he asked, and she smiled at the way the excitement crept into his voice. “Between weeks ten and eleven, the fetus starts to inhale and exhale small amounts of amniotic fluid, which aids in the development of their lungs. It’s kind of like they’re breathing underwater.” 
“I didn’t know that,” she admitted, turning back to set the bag on the counter. “That’s pretty amazing. What about the heartbeat?”
He nodded vigorously as he applied toothpaste to the bristles of his brush. “We should be able to hear it, although sometimes it’s too early— depending on the accuracy of the estimated date of conception.”
He ran the water over the toothbrush before popping it into his mouth. She kissed his shoulder and then moved back into the bedroom, shuffling into their closet for his go bag. She checked it over on her way back to the bathroom, ensuring it had been fully repacked after the last case. She set it on the counter and placed his toiletry bag inside, leaving it open for him to pack his toothbrush and then sitting on the closed toilet lid. 
He rinsed his mouth and put his travel cap over the head of his toothbrush, gesturing with it and then dropping it into the bag. “They’ll do some routine lab work to test for things like gestational diabetes, and we can also choose to do additional screeners for chromosomal abnormalities and possible complications.” He looked at her then, and she saw the despondence creeping back in. “I should really be there, just— just in case.”
“Honey.” She stood and held out her hand to him, smiling a little when he accepted it with a squeeze. “It’s gonna be okay.” 
He let out a breath and pulled her into his arms, and they held each other in the silence, the soft light from the vanity washing over them. His phone buzzed with an incoming message, and she knew he needed to get on the road. Still, she held him for a second longer, and then they shuffled through the door and into the bedroom together. 
Y/N made her way back to bed, scooting down under the duvet to preserve the last remaining notes of his body warmth. She watched as he dressed silently, pulling on trousers, socks, a button up and cardigan. He skipped the tie in favor of coming to sit on the bed, bringing his hand to rest lightly over top of her belly over the covers. 
She covered his hand with her own and laced their fingers together. “Maybe you could ask Luke if you can FaceTime with his phone. You can probably take twenty minutes, right?”
He nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, I can do that.” He rubbed a tired hand over his face. “Maybe I should just upgrade my own phone.”
She huffed out a laugh. “Oh, I see how it is. Couldn’t upgrade for me, but once a baby comes along you’re ready for an iPhone.” 
“That’s not— you— you shouldn’t have to do all of this alone,” he huffed, and she realized her joke didn’t land when his voice cracked at the end. 
“Spence, I’m— I’m just teasing.” She lifted her hands to his face, pulling him closer and meeting his eyes. “I’m sorry; you’re upset, and that wasn’t nice.” 
She leaned up to kiss his forehead, letting her lips linger and breathing him in. “But I’m not alone. With you, I feel— the opposite of alone.”
“Irritated?” he offered. 
“No,” she laughed. “Supported, and cared for, and loved,” she corrected with a smile. “You’ve been all of that since day one. And I know that’s not going to change, whether you’re physically present in that doctor's office or not. Right?” 
When he nodded, she continued, “I love you. The most. And you are easily the best baby daddy on planet earth. Okay?”
The term of endearment dragged a smile from him, as it always did. “Okay.”
She leaned forward to press her lips to his, both sets upturned and a little dry from sleep. “Now, you need to go, or you’re gonna be late.”
“I know.” He kissed her again, long and slow, and then pulled back to lean their foreheads together. He hesitated for another ten seconds before standing to grab his bag from the bathroom. 
When he re-emerged, she reminded him, “Ask Luke about the FaceTime thing. I’m sure he won’t mind, and we can trust him to keep the secret. The appointment technically starts at 1:00, but I probably won’t be seen until at least 1:30.”
He crossed to give her another kiss. “I love you.” He crouched to press a kiss to her tummy. “And you.”
“We love you, too,” she smiled, fingers tangling in his curls. “And we’ll talk to you in a few hours.”
She kissed him one more time— couldn’t help herself. And then his warmth was gone from the bed, and the house was suddenly much too quiet. She snuggled back down under the duvet, her head on his pillow and the scent of his shampoo shrouding her senses and easing her mind.
Spencer really was supportive— endlessly so. Not overbearing, but interested and involved in every moment: reading all the newest research, bringing home her favorite treats, writing out a color-coded timeline of all the appointments and milestones. She wasn’t lying when she called him the best baby daddy. He was always there for her. So much so that the apprehension she’d had at the beginning of this surprise journey was nowhere to be found. 
As she drifted back into sleep, there he was again— she could almost hear the jangling of his keys in the bowl in the entryway, his feet on the stairs, the rustling of his pants and sweater being discarded onto the floor of their bedroom. 
And then she felt the warmth of his palm low over her tummy, coming to rest over the barely-there bump. She felt his lips on her shoulder and his chest pressed against her back. When she went to cover his hand with her own, her exhausted brain registered that it wasn’t a dream at all.
She turned her head, blinking her eyes open to see him smiling at her and drew her brows together. “What’s going on?”
He pressed another kiss to her shoulder, snuggling even closer and rubbing his thumb along her belly. “I’m, um— I told Emily I’m gonna consult from home on this one.”
“Okay, Mom, this’ll just be a little bit cold.”
Dr. Layton smoothed the gel over Y/N’s lower abdomen, and Spencer moved to thread their fingers together, shifting to stand even closer to the examination table. The ultrasound machine gave off a low hum as the doctor adjusted the wand over her tummy. She felt Spencer press a kiss to her temple and turned to smile brightly at him before turning back to the black and white screen. 
At her first appointment five weeks ago, she’d been by herself— alone and uncertain and terrified— and she’d declined the option of the ultrasound. It felt wrong to see the baby before Spencer even knew about them. Now, together with him, with her soon-to-be husband— she was more than ready to see their baby for the first time. And she could practically feel Spencer’s excitement next to her, his body nearly vibrating with it. 
“Ah, here they are. Hello, Baby Reid.” Dr. Layton pointed to a small, white figure on the screen. “Okay, right here, you can see their big ol’ head— perfectly normal size for this stage of development,” she assured, eyes deftly scanning the image in front of her. “Everything looks great! Now, I’m just trying to find…” 
She adjusted the wand over Y/N’s tummy, and suddenly a wub wub wub came over the tinny speaker of the machine. “There we are,” Dr. Layton smiled. “Very strong heartbeat.”
Spencer squeezed Y/N’s hand, and she felt the drop of a tear on her shoulder. She brought her other hand over to cover their tangled fingers, rubbing her thumb along the skin of his wrist and kissing his arm. 
Dr. Layton made a slightly perplexed humming sound, moving the wand again and losing the sound of the heartbeat, only to pick it up again— this time slightly faster. Y/N’s own heart stuttered a little as the doctor moved the wand again twice more, and then cleared her throat. “Is something— is everything okay?”
She turned to Y/N with a kind smile. “Yes, yes,” she confirmed, and then she raised her eyebrows. “Just— do you hear the difference?” 
Spencer tilted his head in consideration, drawing his brows together and straining to hear. The doctor shifted the wand once more, allowing them to hear the two distinct patterns. 
Two distinct patterns, Y/N realized. 
Dr. Layton pressed the wand a little more firmly into her abdomen, moved it just slightly. “Those are two different heartbeats.” She pointed to the screen. “And those are two different babies. There’s a matching set of Baby Reids in there.”
Y/N couldn’t stop her jaw from dropping. “Is there—” She turned to Spencer incredulously. “Do twins run in your family?”
He shook his head silently, eyes wide. “Yours?”
“Nope,” she squeaked. 
“This obviously changes things slightly,” Dr. Layton explained, cleaning up the residual gel. “I’d like to see you every three weeks rather than every four. Then at twenty eight weeks, we’ll see how we feel, okay?” 
She smiled gently as Y/N and Spencer nodded dumbly. She removed her gloves and stood. “I’m going to give you two a few minutes. I’ll be back with your photos in a bit, and we can talk about any questions you might have.”
The door closed behind her, and the room was bathed in silence. Y/N sat up carefully and swung her legs over the side of the examination table. She looked down at her tiny, unassuming bump and felt a tear slip over her lashes. 
“Are you— are you okay?” Spencer whispered. 
She brought her gaze to his, found them teeming with barely restrained joy and yet the ever-present worry. “Well,” she started. “I, um— I always imagined two kids.” She brought her hands up to her sweaty cheeks and held her own face between her palms. “I guess this is— you know— just a quicker way to get there.”
Spencer immediately wrapped her in a hug, pressing kisses over her hair, her forehead, her shocked mouth. “Two babies. We’re having two babies.”
“Twins, Spence,” she breathed. “Twins.”
He replaced her hands with his own, cradling her face and kissing her sweetly, sighing all of his joy and adoration into her mouth. “I love you. So much. The most.” He lowered himself to press his lips to her belly. “All of you.”
She used gentle hands in his hair to tilt his face up, meeting his smile with a watery one of her own. “We love you, too, baby daddy.”
She could see the gears turning as he stood, his hands coming to rest on her hips. “About that.”
She raised her eyebrows. “Yes?”
“Do you, um— how difficult do you think it would be to get everyone together this weekend?”
She paused. “You wanna get married this weekend?”
“Yeah, that’s probably too soon, huh?” He huffed out a sigh, then his eyebrows shot up. “Oh, what about next weekend?”
“That’s just as soon!” she laughed. 
He furrowed his brow. “No, it’s not. There's a seven day difference.”
“You’re really in a rush, huh?” she teased. 
“Well. I just— I figure you should really be on my insurance anyway,” he reasoned. “Especially now that it’s— now that it’s twins.”
“Mm, yes, I’m sure that’s the reason,” she grinned.
He let out a long breath, and she watched his eyes journey over her face— memorizing every curve and angle, every new wrinkle, every last inch of her. And she knew the reason. 
“I know it’s just a piece of paper,” he murmured. “It doesn’t really change anything, but…” He used gentle fingers to brush her hair back from her face. “I just… really want to be your husband.”
She took her own minute to memorize the way he looked in this moment: her fiancé, the father of her children, the best man she’d ever known, the absolute love of her life. And she knew her own reason. 
“The paper might not change anything,” she agreed. “But— you’ve changed everything.”
He squeezed her hips. “In a good way I hope.”
“The best way.” She brought her hands to his face, rubbing her thumbs along his cheeks. “The best way.”
He closed the distance between them to kiss her with all the honey and magic and reverence he always did. He broke away to lean his forehead against hers with all the warmth and devotion and love he always did. She sighed, and it was all joy and vulnerability and contentment like it always was. And she knew their reasons. 
She kissed him again, and then murmured against his lips, “You know I’m still gonna refer to you as baby daddy, right?”
The laugh erupted from his chest and wrapped itself around her heart, tying tight and secure— a shield, and a haven, and a refuge— keeping her safe from every terrible thing. 
“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
O no! Love is an ever-fixed mark 
That looks on tempests and is never shaken; 
It is the star to every wandering bark, 
Whose worth’s unknown, although his height be taken.
- William Shakespeare, Sonnet 116
———
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creepychan08 · 3 years ago
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Oikawa x reader - A married life
"Now I'm asking you, what is this?" You shoved the screen of your phone,  towards your husband as he squinted his eyes at the sudden action.
"I told you,  I was at the company party and I-" Oikawa stopped. The picture showed him kissing a woman clad in revealing dress. His hands covered her cheeks as it looked like he was gladly returning the affection.
"Yn,  I know what it looks like but I promise you its not what it seems like to you."
"Then why are you kissing her!?" You threw your hands in the air,  frustrated at your husband. It didn't help that your hormones were skyrocketing and out of place. You were 3 months pregnant, after all.
"Look, she grabbed me out of nowhere and just forced herself on me. I was trying to push her that's why my hands were around her head. Baby, I wouldn't do that to you. You know I only love you."
You were rendered speechless at his explanation. The ache in your chest dispersing as you calm down. He wrapped his arms around you, running his hands through your soft hair.
"I'm sorry." You mumbled, hiding your face in his chest. He smell so good beneath the smooth texture of his suit. Unknowingly to you, Oikawa's eyes were tightly shut as he bit his lips guiltily.
"It's just whenever I go to your workplace, I always see her sauntering around you. She's obviously trying to seduce you. That's why I asked you again and again to avoid her as much as possible. I don't want to lose you" Voicing out your insecurities made you feel vulnerable. But you know that being in a relationship require two parties involved to be honest with each other. Communication and trust remains the strong foundation of your marriage.
"I know,  sweetheart. But tell me, who sent that picture to you?" He pulled back and just when you were about to answer,  another chime from your phone took both of your attention.
You clicked it open. Oikawa right by your side as he curiously look at your text. You didn't mind it. There was nothing to hide from him anyway.
The message opened to reveal a video. Tapping the play button, it shows your husband furiously making out with the same girl in the earlier photo. They were situated in a corner,  away from everyone as some of his coworkers were busily drinking.
You hands started shaking as tears unconsciously poured from your eyes. Feeling your husband tense from beside you only confirms your theory. The video soon ended and there was tense silence.
You looked up to see Oikawa with his head bowed, hair covering his eyes. Even from your position, you couldn't see his expression. But it didn't matter. The video says it all. You didn't bother asking for explanation this time.
Slowly, you begun untangling his arms around you. Letting out a hollow laugh, you shook your head in dismay.
Funny how you always laugh at those cliche movies whenever a girl experiences heartbreak. They always portray it as a physical pain, symtoms similar to a heart attack. But you deem it as bullshit. Sure, it hurts. But its impossible to feel that much pain just from losing the one you love, right?
So why does it feel like you're dying now? Your heart still beats. But it feels as if it was literally torn and stamp repeatedly. You tried to breath normally but something lodge in your throat and why can't you breath properly?  Why does your lungs seem to stop working right when you need it most?
"Yn!"
"YN!!!"
Choking back a gasp, you return to reality as you see Oikawa panicking as he held you.
"Are you okay? Breath slowly, baby" He instructed, rubbing his hand soothingly on your back as you tried to regain your senses.
"Why, Tooru?" You finally gathered the courage to ask. The feeling of betrayal rang loud and clear on your hoarse voice and he winced from it.
"I'm sorry Yn. I'm sorry for lying. I got pretty drunk at the party. I lose control. We haven't done it for a while after you got pregnant and she was there and just flaunting around and kept rubbing me, saying things how she's going to make me feel good and I just- I!" He rambled, truth finally spilling from those lips you loved so much. His eyes were everywhere but you.
You didn't know what to feel. You asked for the truth, right? But you feel so much worse now.
"Are you blaming me for being pregnant, Tooru?"
"Shit,  no Yn-"
"We planned this together! You said you wanted to build a family with me. And we both decided to refrain from any sexual activities while I'm in my early pregnancy to avoid any possible complications while the baby is being developed. We talked about it and we both agreed! So why are you turning it against me now?"
"I know it wasn't an excuse, Yn! And I know I'm wrong. God,  I'm so wrong.Please, forgive me." Oikawa sobbed, tears cascading down the smooth expanse of his cheeks as he begged for your forgiveness.
"If you can't help yourself then maybe I shouldn't have agreed to have a baby with you!" You cried, anger radiating off you in waves.
"All those nights you came home late. Was it because you were taking your sweet time with her? Hm?" You smiled at him mockingly and his eyes widened in protest.
"No, Yn!" He tightly clutched your arms, desperately forcing you to hear him out, "Listen to me. I took all those overtime to gain extra money. That was in preparation for when our baby comes! Please believe me when I say it was for us!"
You looked at him with dull eyes. The aftermath of the fight just leaves you exhausted. You didn't know what to believe anymore. This was the man you had vowed to be with for the rest of your life. This was the man you wholeheartedly love and respect. Trust had always been your foundation,  hasn't it? 
Where has all the trust gone to?
You placed your hand on your belly. Wondering if he or she can feel the pain their father just bestowed to you. Hopefully not. You never want any harm nor pain come to your baby.
"I'm going to sleep. I'm tired." Coming up with a lame excuse, you turn to walk away when a hand firmly grasp your arms, not in a painful way.
"Lets talk about this, Yn. I don't want us to go to sleep tonight without resolving this issue." Oikawa pleaded with you, eyes begging for a chance. Any time, you will easily give in but after what happened, you don't know how to face him.
"I don't know what to say anymore, Tooru. I just want to rest." You smiled at him resignedly. Oikawa gritted his teeth. His heart throb painfully. How can you say that with such look on your face? Knowing that he caused your pain only increased the frustration and guilt running through his veins.
With a sigh,  he unwillingly yielded to your request. Letting go of your hand,  he watched your back face him as you slowly walked further away from him.
He will later learn that that was the biggest mistake of his life.
That night, both of you slept in the same bed as usual. Although a few inches only separates you, both your hearts were distanced with an invisible barrier. One trying to forget the pain it experienced,  while the other trying to find ways to have you back to him.
It was dead silent. You were tilting in between reality and dreams when a sudden, sharp pain tore through your abdomen and you screamed in pain. Startling your husband who immediately checked on you.
"Yn-chan,  are you okay?  What happened!?" Oikawa asked,  panic covering his features as he took in your pain filled expression. He felt the sheets wet and he clicked the bedside lamp open to see your side in bed covered in blood.
Your pupils dilated as you took in the sight. Another stabbing pain washed over you and you keeled in agony, stifling your screams. You barely felt Oikawa whisper comforting words to you before quickly lifting you up to bring you to the hospital.
My baby. No,  I can't lose him/her. Was the only thought going through your mind.
"It hurts" you groaned in pain as Oikawa comfortingly grip your hand with one of his own as he drive with one hand. (AN: Not safe. Don't do this guys. Always drive safely)
"Take deep breaths, love"
"My baby" Sobbing in distress, you held on your stomach and Oikawa felt like vomiting. A lot has happened in the past couple of hours and the thought of something happening to your unborn child didn't help the queasy feeling in his gut.
"I'm here, Yn. Nothing will happen to you nor our baby." Pretending to be strong for the both of you, he forcefully blinked the tears forming on his eyes.
Everything happened fast after that. It was like everything was a blur for him. You were quickly taken in the emergency room before you were transferred to the operating room. The doctor and nurses explained what was happening to you and what they were about to do. He numbly agreed to what they say. Only repeated over and over again that they must save you.
Before long he found himself waiting outside the operating theatre. His ears were ringing as he looked at his surroundings. It was surreal. Like his body was there but his consciousness somewhere else. He was only brought back to reality when he felt harsh tugging on his shoulder.
"Oi,  Oikawa get a grip on yourself!"
"Iwa-...chan..? How did you get here? "
"You texted me,  did you forget?"
"Ah.. Right" Oikawa mumbled, blankly staring at nowhere in particular. He felt drained but the anxiety running on his body did not allow him to even get an ounce of rest as he waited for the news on his wife and baby.
Iwaizumi frowned. It was unusual to see his bestfriend so distraught. He still didn't know what happened after all, Oikawa only texted him that he was in the hospital after something happened to his wife. But he felt asking would be too insensitive on his part so he stay silent and tried to just be there for his bestfriend.
"It was my fault,  y'know" Oikawa finally spoke after some time.
Iwaizumi patiently waited for him to continue, silently confused on Oikawa blaming himself.
"We had a fight. She saw me making out with the girl she hated from our company. Somebody sent her a video of it."
Iwaizumi was shocked. He knew Oikawa was a huge flirt back in their high school days but that he also outgrew it when he fall in love with Yn Ln. They were happy together and rarely had a fight as much as he knew. Or was it all a facade?
Suddenly,  he felt anger rush through him at the foolishness of his bestfriend. Messing around when he knew his wife was pregnant! Iwaizumi opened his mouth to curse at his close friend when he was frozen at the sight.
Oikawa was staring at him with regret painted all over his face. Tears continuously fall on his cheeks. The usual light in his warm, soft eyes was gone and all that was left was an endless pit of misery and hopelessness.
"I screwed up, Iwa-chan" He whispered, defeated.
Flinching in response, Iwaizumi's anger quickly switch into sympathy for his friend as he assessed his poor condition.
"She's strong. Stop thinking on the worst scenario. Just focus on what you will do after this." While giving him a reassurring pat on the back. Oikawa released a shaky breath as he nodded at his friends' advice.
Suddenly,  the doors to the operating room opened and a doctor wearing scrubs came out. Two nurses were by his side.
"We're looking for the husband of Yn, Ln"
"That is me"
Oikawa quickly stand up from his seat and approach the doctor. He was then escorted to an empty room where the two nurses silently left him and the doctor to discuss the aftermath of the procedure.
With his heart beating loudly, Oikawa eagerly fired questions to the doctor.
"How is she?  How's my wife?  My baby?  Were you able to save them?  When can I see them?"
The doctor resignedly took of his mask.
"I'm sorry to inform you,  Oikawa-san but the baby didn't make it. Your wife had a spontaneous miscarriage. It has no specific cause. Women in their first trimester or early pregnancy are more prone to experience it that's why stress must be avoided at all times especially during this sensitive period in a womans' body."
Oikawa felt like being doused in cold water. He stayed frozen while staring at the doctor who looked grim. After seeing all that blood came out on his wife,  he already knew deep inside that they lost the baby but he simply refused to believe it. He hang on to that tiny hope that maybe their unborn baby can be saved.
He shakily gulped, feeling his heart break. The pain was intense. They were looking forward to the arrival of their first child and for this to happen-
"What about my wife? Can I see her now?" He was hurting. Greatly. But he couldn't imagine how his wife was faring. She was the one carrying their child, after all. He wanted to comfort her and be there for her.
"I-" the doctor stopped and cleared his throat. Oikawa felt something amiss. Like an impending doom but he quickly tried to shoo the thought away.
"Doctor, how is she? I want to talk to her as soon as possible."
"That is another matter I must discuss with you, Oikawa-san."
The nerves were killing him and it took all his self restraint to not jump across the table and force the surgeon to speak at once.
"There was.. a complication while we were taking the fetus out of her. The amount of blood was greater than what it should been. We quickly transfused blood into her but it wasn't enough. We tried to resuscitate her but in the end she.. died due to heamorrhagic shock."
For a moment, Oikawa forgot how to breath. The world around him turn to black and white and the only words resounding in his mind was that she's dead, she's dead repeatedly.
It didn't fully sink in yet. Until he saw his wife, his beloved Yn, lying still in the operating room. Her face was pale under the glare of OR lights. And if he didn't know any better, it looks as if she is only sleeping peacefully after a long day. But as he caress her cold cheeks, no more warmth emanating from those cheeks he love to kiss so much, he was slapped with the bitter reality that she's not coming back.
No more warm smiles and sweet kisses from his wife as he return home after a long day at work. No more delicious meals waiting for him at the table as they talked about what happened during their day. No more cuddles and whisper of i love you's in the darkness of the night as they lay entangled from the after event of making love.
The perfect picture of a happy family with their son/daughter shattered in his mind as he loudly grieved for the loss of his family.
Kami-sama if you are real,  please let me return back time. Let me be with my family again. Please give me a chance to make things right...
Oikawa loudly gasped as if coming back to land after drowning. He find himself gazing at the ceiling in their room. It was dark. Where was he?
A slight shuffle and then,
"Are you okay? Did you have a nightmare, Tooru?"
That sweet, melodious voice.
Oikawa slowly turn towards the source of sound to see, much to his relief, his beloved wife gazing at him with concern while rubbing the sleep out her eyes.
"Yn-chan" He choked, lunging at her to give her the tightest embrace.
"Woah there,  big guy" You chuckled,  patting his back. You stilled when you felt something wet trickled down your neck.
"I'm so glad! So glad to be with you, Yn!" The pure, raw emotion coming from your husband surprised you as he continued to sob on your neck, clinging to you like a lost baby.
"Please don't ever leave me again!  Kami-sama,  thank you for bringing her back to me!" Oikawa yelled, voice muffled as he continued to shove his face around your neck.
"What has happened to you, dear?" You worriedly asked and pull his face away to wipe some of his tears.
"Do you want to talk about it?" You suggested,  talking about his nightmare.
"No need, love. I just want to say that I *kiss* love *kiss* you *kiss* so damn much!"
You giggled at his affection, loving his kisses.
"Oh and how many months are you again?"
"Silly, did you forget? I'm just two months along. 7 months to go"
Oikawa heaved a sigh of relief. Turning to your stomach,  he leaned down and pulled up your shirt.
"Hey,  little one. I'm so excited to meet you. But for now,  be good for mommy, okay?" Placing a sweet kiss to your stomach,  you smiled at your husbands' attention as you run your fingers through his hair. Oikawa gladly reciprocate your smile with his own.
This time, I'll love you with all of my heart. I won't make the same mistakes again. We will be a happy family, Yn.
Extended ending:
"Yes you heard it right. You're fired." Oikawa coldly said to his assistant. The one who destroyed his past life and made him and his wife suffer.
"But! I-" she whined pathetically, trying to win his sympathy by acting like a pitiful slut. But Oikawa was having none of it.
"I said. Get. Out." The fiery glare in his eyes send shivers down her spine and she immediately booked her way out of his office,  whining like a bitch along the way.
Another extended ending:
7 months later, you tiredly smile at the little bundle of joy in your arms. After 18 hours of grueling labor, you finally had your healthy, baby boy.
"I'm so proud of you." Oikawa wiped the sweat along your forehead as he softly kissed you.
"Thank you for bringing our baby to this world. You make me the happiest person alive, Yn. I love you two so much and I swear to protect you both for the rest of my life." He whispered, tears springing in his eyes at the emotional moment.
"As do I,  Tooru. As do I." You swore,  sealing that promise with sweet kiss.
Fin
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moon-light-jukebox · 4 years ago
Text
see? - [Reid x Reader] - Chapter 4
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previous chapter // series index
Summary: Spencer’s entire world has shifted, but before he can dwell on any of it, he and the rest of the team must race against the clock to find the unsubs newest victim.  
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader
Category: Angst (for now)
Word Count: 3.7k for Chapter 4 
Content Warning: Normal Criminal Minds stuff. Mentions of drug addiction. Angst
A/n: This chapter is the last planned one from Spencer’s POV. This is sort of another cliffhanger...but I’ll try to have chapter 5 out as soon as I can. Thank you for reading!
-- The Price We Pay --
(Spencer’s POV)
The most terrible moments in my life never happened slowly. I couldn’t be sure if that’s because of how my brain processed them or that’s just how they happened.
My hours with Tobias seemed to happen in the blink of an eye. My father all but ran out of my life. The light left Maeve’s eyes in a fraction of a second.
This was different.
I heard Hotch's question; I saw the pain ripple across his face when Garcia gave a muffled reply.
“Penelope,” he said, his voice sounding hollow. “I know you know where she is. I think she’s…she’s in danger, Penelope. Please.”
Hotch doesn't say please. Hotch doesn't beg. I knew that, of course, I knew that. I had known the man for over 10 years now.
That is why his behavior didn't make sense.
Looking back, I think this moment happened so slowly because my brain refused to process the gravity of this moment. It was trying to protect me.
Why would Hotch ask about Y/n right now? I knew Garcia must have helped her go into hiding…but why were we talking about it now?
Despite my brain lagging, my body knew something was wrong. My lungs seized. I heard Rossi say something. His voice was coming from the right…but I couldn't hear him. It's like I was underwater; everything was muffled.
My body was going into shock, but I couldn’t understand why.
“Reid. Reid.” I felt a hand on my shoulder, gripping tightly, trying to anchor me to the moment. “Spencer, come on, kid. Focus.”
He never calls me Spencer, I thought, turning my head to the left to meet the wide brown eyes of my friend. “Derek? What…You’re still driving back.”
“We were a block away.” He turned me more towards him, his left hand coming up to grip the back of my neck, applying just enough pressure to make me focus. “I know this is hard, Kid. But we need you.”
Realistically it had only been minutes since Hotch picked up his phone, but it had felt like hours. And everyone in this room had already pieced together a puzzle I was still struggling to see.
I blinked. Then I blinked again. “Y/n doesn’t have a family." When I turned my gaze to Hotch, I saw my unit chief, my boss, my friend tense for a second before he lifted his head, meeting my gaze head-on. "You…You created the Nightingale system after Haley died. It's emergency family relocation. She's…she wasn't close enough with any of her family to use it."
All of the pieces of the puzzle were there, right there in front of me, but I couldn't snap them together.
Hotch didn't say anything for a moment; he just looked at me. Then he lowered the phone from his ear, clicking a button before the sound of clicking keys filled the room. "You're on speaker, Garcia."
"Sir?" she questioned, her voice nasally and thick with congestion. But even though that, just that one word was dripping with sadness and unease.
"You need to hurry, Penelope. We think the unsub may already have her."
She gave a choked sob before the clicking of her computer keys got faster.
But this doesn’t make sense. “The unsub only takes pregnant women,” I rasped. “He’s…he’s after…but he’s not after any pregnant women…he’s after…”
My mind seemed to wake up with that thought, adrenaline finally running through my system and becoming useful.
Pregnancy, on average, lasts for 280 days. Our unsub wanted heavily pregnant women…he wanted women that were about to go into labor.
Images of the night I was outside her apartment flashed in my mind. The only night I had ever had with her…279 days ago.
The thought of her being with someone else pained me, but I grasped onto the idea with both hands, holding on tightly.
“She’s not…she doesn’t fit the victimology. She….she wouldn't be far enough along. Not unless…" My words hung in the air, my tongue-tied in my mouth, refusing to finish them.
Because if the unsub had her…she would have been pregnant when she left.
My world was slowly shifting into focus at the same moment I felt JJ’s hand on my upper arm.
“Spence,” JJ whispered.
“Did you know?” I choked out. “Did all of you know?”
Morgan clicked his tongue against his teeth before he shook his head. “Nah, kid. I didn’t know.”
But my eyes weren't on either of the people at my sides; my eyes were across the room. My eyes were locked on the man I had always trusted with my life. The man who was the best father I had ever known.
“No one knew besides Garcia and myself,” he said firmly. “I ordered her not to tell anyone else. If you have any issues, you can take them up with me.”
“If I have any issues?” I hissed, my teeth snapping together. It wasn’t until I felt wetness on my cheeks that I realized I was crying. “You…She’s pregnant.”
All of the tension seemed to leave his face, leaving him looking as battered as I felt. “We’ll do this later, Spencer.”
He never called me Spencer. “Is…is the baby…mine?” I had to ask, but everyone in the room already knew.
The man I thought was my friend nodded. “Yes.”
“Hotch!” JJ shrieked. “What were you thinking?! What was Y/n thinking?!”
Any emotion in his eyes hardened at her tone, his shoulders squared. The familiar coldness I saw when he faced down monsters and madmen took over his face. He didn’t look like my friend, like the man I had always admired. He wasn’t Hotch, he wasn’t Aaron; he was Supervisory Special Agent Aaron Hotchner. And he was giving that look…to me.
“I did this because she asked me to. She showed up at my house in the middle of the fucking night because of a fight she had with you. She was…She is like family to me, and she was terrified. Because she went to tell the man she loved that she was pregnant, and he was cruel to her. He said he wished she was dead."
I didn’t flinch under his words; I knew what I had done.
“How could she trust you after that? She didn’t even know you had a problem, Reid.”
My addiction was always the elephant in the room. It didn't matter that I had struggled with it for the better part of 10 years; the team still refused to speak about it out loud.
Until now.
“You should have told me,” was all I could say.
Hotch didn’t budge. “You should have been a man worth telling.”
I flinched then; it was like he shot me. I think it would have hurt less if he had shot me.
Rossi stepped forward, placing a hand on our unit chief’s shoulder. “We don’t have time for this. If he does have our girl, we have to find her. We have to find…them.”
“Garcia,” Hotch barked out.
"I've got it! Her address is 20 Royal Oak Road. But I don't know if she'll be there. I hacked into her computer, and she had…she had a doctor's appointment scheduled for tonight."
I wanted to ask why she would have a doctors’ appointment scheduled for tonight…but I knew why. “Who is her doctor?”
“Reid,” she whispered. “I’m so sorry-“
“Who is her doctor, Garcia?”
“His name is Dr. Johnson. He’s affiliated with St. Mercy’s hospital.”
Hotch grabbed his jacket, already heading for the door. “Rossi, you and Kate go to the abduction site. See if they have any sort of surveillance, witnesses. Anything. JJ, you’re with me at her home. Morgan, I need you to get to the hospital. Spencer-“  
I didn’t hear what he told me. I was already out the door.
--
I had climbed into Morgan’s SUV without thought, settling in my seat a moment before he jumped behind the wheel.
My friend didn’t say anything while we made the 5-minute drive to St. Mercy’s hospital. He said nothing while we both ran inside the hospital’s entrance. The first time he spoke was to the nursing staff, flashing his badge and asking them to pull Dr. Johnson away from whatever patient he was with.
I’m not sure what Derek said, I’m not sure how he was able to convey to them how urgent the matter was, but the doctor was in front of us moments later. He was an older man with thinning white hair and tanned weathered skin.
“Sir, I’m SSA Derek Morgan, this is Dr. Spencer Reid. We’re with the FBI, and we’d like to ask you a few questions about one of your patients.”
“I’m afraid I can’t talk about any of my patients without-“
“I understand that sir, but these are extenuating circumstances. We believe she may be in danger. You heard about the murder in Eugene yesterday?”
All color drained from the man’s face. “You think the person who did that has one of my patients?”
“Yes, we do,” Derek said firmly. He was always so good at this part. He could talk his way into everything. I couldn’t help but wonder what that must be like. “She’s very heavily pregnant, possibly…possibly with a boy.”
“I have several patients that are in their last trimester but…” he trailed off, shifting uncomfortably.
“We have reason to believe that Y/n Y/l/n might be in danger. Her records indicate she had an appointment here with you tonight.”
Dr. Johnson frowned. “I don’t have a patient by that name. I…” he trailed off, his gaze shifting over to me. “I have a Y/n Reid.”
Ever since my confrontation with Hotch, I had been existing in a detached state. Maybe it was my mind’s way of keeping me safe. But hearing her name… “She goes by Reid?” The corners of my lips twitched involuntarily despite the pain radiating from my chest. Of course, she did. It would be the last name I would ever look for.
“I’m afraid I really can’t give out any more information –“
“How far along is she?” I interrupted.
“I’m sorry, I can’t-“
Every single bit of calm and control I had inside of me seem to snap all at once. I took a step forward, my hands balled into fists at my sides. “Listen,” I seethed, my voice like iron. “Not only am I a federal agent, but I am also the fucking father. I want to know when she’s due!”
Dr. Johnson was quite a bit shorter than I was; and while I had never felt like a particularly intimidating person, he seemed to shrink back under my focus. "She's…she's set to be induced tomorrow morning. I have my patients come in the night before. I wanted…I wanted her to be induced earlier but…" He adjusted the glasses on his nose. "She's just so stubborn. She thought she'd go into labor on her own. But I can’t let her go over 42 weeks. She’ll be 41 weeks and 6 days tomorrow. But she never checked in for the appointment.”
“Son of a bitch,” Morgan breathed, pulling his phone out of his pocket and typing rapidly.
“Do…do you know the sex of the baby?” I asked, still trying to hold on to a hope that we were wrong; somehow, despite all of the evidence, we had all been so wrong about this.
“I do. She…Ms. Reid doesn’t know. She wanted it to be a surprise.” He looked uncomfortable for a moment. “Do you…do you want to know?”
“NO, he doesn’t.” I turned to look at Morgan, my eyes struggling to focus. “You’ll find out in the delivery room, kid. We’re going to find her. We’re going to find them.”
It seemed like a ridiculous thing to stress, but it brought me some small sort of comfort while my friend led me out of the hospital to the SUV.
--
Morgan had called Hotch to confirm what we all already knew. Y/n had disappeared to Bend, Oregon, and she was in the final days of her pregnancy. Rossi and Kate found a car registered to Y/n Reid abandoned in a grocery store parking lot. There was an infant car seat and two bags in the back seat. One bag contained baby items…the other were the sorts of things a mother might need in the hospital.
We were all to meet Hotch and JJ at Y/n's apartment, and Hotch had asked that I come along in the hopes that I would see something everyone else had missed.
Because I had known her better than anyone.
“Kid,” Morgan said softly, breaking the silence inside the car. “We’ll find her…we’ll find them.”
I found myself nodding in agreement automatically. It felt like the right sort of reaction to have. My friend was worried about me, and sometimes you just do things because it’s better for the other person.
I couldn’t help but wonder if that’s how Y/n felt that night. The night she left.
"Her phone is still on," I found myself saying. Morgan didn't respond, but I saw him glance over at me out of the corner of his eye. "The same phone she had before she left. I don't know why she never disconnected it. Sometimes…" I broke off, emotion suddenly clogging my throat, threatening to strangle me. "Sometimes, I call it just to hear her voice. I know she won't pick up. But the…the message is still her voice. I always leave a message. I don't know if she ever checks them. But I always leave one…just…just in case." My hand came up to wipe angrily at my cheeks, embarrassed both by my confession and the emotions I couldn't seem to hold in.
“She’ll hear the messages, Reid.”
I gave him another automatic nod.
It turns out Y/n didn’t live too far from the police station. Her home was in an apartment complex on the south end of town, on the third floor. I couldn’t the number of steps from the elevator to her blue front door. Twenty-three.
The instant I stepped inside, it felt wrong; everything felt wrong. The living room was basic and utilitarian. Impersonal. Nothing like Y/n. She was the sort of person who always felt like home.
This didn’t feel like anybody’s home.
I followed Morgan through the house, taking note of how clean and orderly everything was. Y/n had never been messy, but her apartment at home was filled to the brim with objects and things that made her smile.
"There are no pictures on the walls, nothing personal,” Morgan noted, giving voice to my own thoughts. “Hotch?” he called.
“We’re in here,” his voice replied, leading us down a small hallway.
On the right side of the hallway, there was another door that had been thrown open, and we found the other member of my team standing inside.
The room was painted a pale grey with white curtains hanging across the only window. There was a small, darker grey crib against the biggest wall and a rocking chair in the corner.
Something about the sight of that rocking chair was a punch to the stomach because I could see her in it so clearly. Her eyes soft while she moved the chair back and forth, holding a tiny bundle in her arms.
How long had I wanted to be a father? How many times had I dreamed of starting a family with Y/n…only to lose it all now?
“Spence,” JJ said, stepping towards me.
I couldn't look at her; I ignored her because I couldn’t do anything else. “The doctor said she didn’t know the gender of the baby. But I don’t think she would have painted the room pink or blue. She was never that sort of person.”
My eyes ran over the rest of the room. There was a small chest of drawers against another wall with some sort of platform on top of it. A changing table, I thought absentmindedly. There were pictures of stars hung on the walls, small boxes of diapers stacked neatly in the closet.
By the time I made my way over to the rocking chair, I could barely see anything. My torture by Tobias had cost me so much already; my addiction had robbed so much from me. But now I was standing in my child's nursery, and I was having trouble remembering any pain that had ever felt worse than this.
There was a small table beside the chair with a small lamp placed in the middle, but my eyes were fixed on the book pearched on the edge of the table. My fingers wrapped around the spine of the book, lifting it with shaking hands. The cover was white with a tiny bunny rabbit on the corner.  
“Kid,” I heard Morgan say softly from behind me.
I couldn’t stop myself from flipping open the book, even though I knew it would bring me nothing but pain.
'The Story of You' was written on the first page in swirling script, right above a sonogram picture. My eyes moved over the outline of a face that I knew I would love for the rest of my life,;my fingers moved over the glossy paper, tracing the outline of my child's features.
A strangled sound left my throat when I read the words underneath the photo, my eyes squeezing tight.
“Spencer?” Rossi asked, coming up to my side. “What is it?”
I couldn’t open my eyes, but I tried to clear my throat, willing myself to speak. “The doctor said she didn’t know the baby’s sex…but…but I think she did anyway.”
Because underneath the photo, I saw her familiar handwriting.
Knowing the name of a child that wasn't even born yet wouldn't help me find her; it wasn't relevant to the case, but I couldn't move past it.
“Isaac Benjamin Reid.”
I couldn’t be sure how long the silence lasted before Rossi asked if that name had any significance to y/n.
“No, I don’t think so,” I said softly. “It’s…it has significance to me. Isaac Asimov is my father’s favorite author. I hadn’t read any of his works since my dad left…but one day on the jet, Y/n got me talking about it. The next day I found a copy of I, Robot on my desk at work. She didn’t say anything, but I knew it was her.”
It was always her.
“And Benjamin?” Hotch prodded.  
I let out a heavy exhale. “Ben Walker is my NA sponsor. He has been for over 8 years.” It wasn’t lost on me that none of my team knew about Ben. I never talked about that part of my life; I hadn’t even told Y/n he was my sponsor. I had no idea how she knew about him, but there was no doubt in my mind that’s why she’s selected this name.
“This doesn’t make sense,” JJ muttered, causing me to finally look up at her. “I’m sorry, but none of this makes sense. You said that she didn’t know the baby’s sex.”
"That's what the doctor said," I clarified before closing the book softly. "I guess she just had a feeling."
My friend nodded. “Of course. But how did the unsub know? Garcia has been digging for over an hour. Y/n was…she was hiding, Reid. She worked from home. She doesn’t have a social media presence. Garcia can’t even find any indication that she has friends.”
“So, how did the unsub find her?” Hotch finished. “How did the unsub know she existed? Let alone that she was pregnant with a boy.”
Kate stepped into the room, her eyes moving over everything. "Alright. We need to revisit each victim. Then we need to determine if he came here for y/n or if he just found her. If she's over 40 weeks, I'm sure it's obvious that she's pregnant."
JJ moved to the window and pulled back the curtains, her eyes moving over the street. “But how did he know it was a boy? How did he know any of the victims were pregnant with boys?”
The ringing of Hotch’s phone cut through the air. “Go ahead, Garcia.”
“Sir, I’ve been trying to hack not the security systems of the buildings around the supermarket. I’m not sure what I’m looking for, but I’m trying to find any vehicle that seems evil.”
“Did you find anything?”
"Kevin and I have been running license plates against the state of Oregon's DMV. There's a bank two blocks away from the grocery store. Their security footage captured a black sedan driving by about 15 minutes after Y/n's debit card was used at the grocery store."
Rossi spoke next. “Is there any reason to suspect that car?”
“The plates belong to a different car, a red Volvo. It’s not much, but it’s all I’ve got.”
Hotch nodded. “It’s our best lead. Can you track the car through traffic cameras?”
“Doing it now, sir.”
We all started moving towards the door before Hotch gave another order. "Send us the most recent locations, then every single location afterward as soon as you get it. We'll split up and try to canvas the area. Y/n could go into labor at any moment. He couldn't have gone far."
Hotch didn't bother telling me to stay behind this time, but I felt his eyes on me when I got into one of the SUVs. Maybe it was guilt, maybe it was his knowledge that I wouldn't listen to him anyway.
It didn’t matter.
Morgan set off at a breakneck speed, his door barely closing before we started moving. His posture was tense, and his eyes were moving over the landscape rapidly.
“She’s gonna be okay, Spencer.”
I let out a bitter laugh. “You don’t know that Derek.”
“Yes, I do,” he said firmly. “She’s not just a pregnant woman. She’s a profiler. She’s one of the best profilers I’ve ever seen. I don’t know how this son of a bitch found her, but Garcia created her background. There is no fucking way he knew who she is. He doesn’t know he took an FBI agent.”
The thought should have brought me comfort, but it didn't. It just tore an even bigger hole in my chest. Y/n had left because of me. She had gone into hiding because she was afraid of me. She had a new identity that had potentially made her vulnerable…made my son vulnerable because of me.
Morgan was right; we had to find her.
Because I didn’t think I would be able to survive her paying for my mistakes.
------
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justimajin · 4 years ago
Text
The Spontaneous Adoption
Pairing: Seokjin x Reader 
Genre: Fluff, Angst (just a little) 
Words: 8.6k
Summary: It’s no secret that you’re not particularly fond of children, always maintaining a distance from the little ones and the title of a parent remaining quite non-existential on your checklist. But when a sudden last minute opportunity presents itself and you’re committed to helping out a dear friend, you can only hope that you and your boyfriend are up for the challenge. 
Warnings: pg13 rating, stressful times - Y/N and Jin start to go crazy at one point (with some hints of angst) 
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The apartment is ornate and spacious, an old brown leather couch resting in the far corner and opposite to the newly installed television set. It’s cozy and private, not a speck of dust nor loose hair in sight. A small cup rests on the side of the kitchen counter, brimming with freshly brewed coffee. 
The door comes slamming open. 
You spin around, pupils dilating and hand protectively hovering over the cup. There’s a woman standing at the door frame, dressed in a white blouse and a pencil skirt, her hand tightly wound around a briefcase and a jacket hanging off of her left elbow. Dark circles outline the outskirts of her orbs, a deep crease settling in between her brows and a fatigued expression masking her delicate features. 
Her tense body straightens up and she raises her hands. 
“Y/N!” 
She immediately lunges for you, briefcase falling to the ground and arms wrapping around your torso. You abandoned the cup of coffee you were anticipating to drink, reciprocating with furrowed brows. 
“Yeong Hee?” You lean back, breaking away from the hug, “What are you doing here?” 
“Oh, Y/N.” She exhales like she’s just returned after being centuries away. Her hands raise in defense and a look of guilt etches onto her, “I’m so sorry for suddenly barging in like that.” 
You nod, waiting for her to continue, “I-I just really wanted to see you‒if you’re not too busy?”
A small knowing smile curls on your lips, “Sit down. I’ll grab you some coffee to drink.” 
Yeong Hee eagerly complies, flopping quite ungraciously on your couch as you rummage through your cabinets for an extra cup. She leans her head against the white pillow you just leave there in case of much needed mid-day naps, letting out a relieved sigh that has the corner of your mouth lifting. 
Splitting the coffee you made into two cups, you sit down next to her on the couch, slipping a cup in her direction. 
“So what brings you here?” 
“Oh you know, just wanted to stop by and see how you’ve been doing.” She takes the cup, averting her eyes. 
“Huh.” You acknowledge, “I’ve been doing great these days actually, nothing to worry about.” 
“Good, good.” She glances around, as if inspecting your place. You raise an eyebrow at that, closely following her line of sight with suspicion. 
She immediately whirls around, “You only have one bedroom in here, right?” 
“Yeah…?” You ponder, waiting for her to add more details in. She resumes back to quietly sipping down on her coffee, the effects on caffeine seeming to lift her spirits up. 
“Yeong Hee?” You cautiously ask. She peers up with intrigued eyes. 
“Yes?” 
“Did you have a fight with Namjoon recently?” 
You straight up just asked it. No beating against the bush, no endless pondering until she reveals it, simply observe and assess the situation, then take your best crack at what’s really going on. 
Yeong Hee goes dead silent. 
You wonder if you potentially struck a nerve you weren’t supposed to, if the candid question wasn’t what she wanted to hear at the moment. Leaning closer, you bring your cup to your lips, your gaze not flattering away from her. 
She instantly beams, surprising you a bit, “No, no! Namjoon has been lovely, Y/N!” A laugh escapes her at the mere suggestion. 
“A-As always..…” Her light chuckles die down, gaze falling down to her cup. 
“Yeong Hee.” You persist. Although you don’t know all the variables to the equation, you have an inkling that her sudden appearance at your apartment with a disheveled appearance isn’t just a mere coincidence. 
You narrow your eyes, blurting out the question without a second thought. “Is it the baby?” 
Yeong Hee looks up at you in absolute terror. 
That definitely struck a nerve. 
Before you can say anything to soothe your previous statement, Yeong Hee bursts out into tears. Her reaction throws you off completely and soon you’re scrambling around, trying to locate a tissue box for her. 
“Here.” You hand her a tissue she gratefully accepts, rubbing a hand against her back, “Let it all out, it’s okay.” 
“God Y/N, it’s a nightmare!” She wails, “I just don’t know what to do anymore!” 
“What happened, Yeong Hee?” You press, needing some clarification. 
“The baby, Y/N!” Yeong Hee whimpers, “She just cries so much, and for hours, on end!” Her mind runs astray, countless recollections emerging, “I can’t even remember the last time I got a decent night of rest! On top of that Namjoon just starts researching all these remedies to help out because he’s worried and then I’m worried and then the whole house is worried so the baby cries even more!” Her vision begins to fog with tears, and she covers her face with her hands, “I just can’t take it, Y/N!” 
You envelope her in your arms, “Just to let you know, Namjoon does have the tendency to overact.” 
She halts her crying to stare at you with wide eyes, “Right?! I tell him to just relax, but he’ll go on about how he’s a bad father because he can't get the baby to sleep when I’m not around!” 
“It’s okay, Yeong Hee.” You ease, “This is your first child and it’s never easy taking care of a baby.” 
“I know Y/N, I really do.” She confesses, wiping away any excess of water from her flushed face, “But I’ve never felt more stressed out in my life. My job, and then Namjoon, and then the baby,” Shaking her head, you wonder if there was ever a time you’ve seen her look so exhausted, “It’s just too much.” 
At the mention of her husband again, you tilt your head, “When’s the last time you and Namjoon went out?” 
Yeong Hee glances up in her spot, lost in contemplation. 
“Probably during my pregnancy?” She replies as if asking you, “We used to go on small walks together, so I could get more exercise, but since then we’ve just been going to our separate jobs…”
“I would barely consider that a date.” You debate, pressing a finger against your lips. “It doesn’t sound like you guys have been spending that much time with each other.” 
“I think you’re right.” Her bottom lip trembles and your eyes widen, “I-I guess this means I’m a bad wife now, too!” 
She breaks into sobs and you wince, too high in hopes that she was alright and ready to talk it out. Her sobs become intenser and harsher as seconds fly by and you begin to contemplate if there’s anything you can do other than being a listening ear for her pain. 
“What if....” Yeong Hee gazes at you with defeated eyes and you blurt out the words without a second thought, “What if I took care of her for a while?” 
She blinks, “What do you mean?” 
You sigh internally, wondering how you could be foolish enough to offer up the idea. Shaking that thought away, it seems now you don’t have a choice but to own up to your words. 
“What if I took care of her? So that you and Namjoon could get a break and spend some time together, maybe even go on a date?” 
Yeong Hee stares at you like you’re an angel that’s been sent down to heaven just for her, “You would do that, Y/N?” 
You want to desperately turn back, “O-Of course.” 
“That’s….wow, that would mean so much to me Y/N.” Her eyes grow wide, “Do you think you’ll be okay? If it seems too much, you don’t have to.” 
You see the immense amount of relief flooding through her features, your sole suggestion bringing an array of hope you think Yeong Hee has desperately needed. 
“It’s okay.” You persuade, “I can look after her for a week. You and Namjoon just promise me you’ll go out and worry about yourselves instead of the baby for once.” 
Tears begin to well up in Yeong Hee’s eyes, and she launches herself at you, embracing you into a huge hug right away. 
“Thank you Y/N! Thank you so much!” 
You softly smile, happy that you were able to alleviate her troubles somehow. 
Yeong Hee soon leaves after asking if she could cook you dinner one time for your offer, but you refuse and say that you don't want anything in return for this. A handful of thank you’s and gracious hugs on her behalf later, you close the door behind her as she rushes back home. 
You spin around, slapping a hand against your stressed temples as a deep groan leaves your lips ‒ because there’s one crucial fact you’ve conveniently decided to leave out from Yeong Hee’s knowledge. 
You’ve accepted to take care of her baby for a week, even after being aware of how much you despise kids. 
***
You open the door to your apartment. 
There’s a dark-haired man leaning against your door frame, his bangs sweeping across his forehead and arms crossed against his broad torso. A small smirk rests on his lips, pouty lips pulled into a sneaky grin that already informs you of what kind of remark he’s aching to spew. 
“Did someone order an extra handsome boyfriend to come to their rescue?” He bats the eyelashes of his innocent orbs, his level of confidence instantly spiking up. 
“Really?” You ponder, mimicking his innocence. Taking a glance outside of the door and behind him, you turn to him in confusion, “Where is he then?”
A loud scoff leaves Seokjin’s lips and you playfully chuckle, widening the door for him. He follows after you after shutting the door, peering around the place. 
“So what was this emergency situation you were telling me about?” He inquires, appearing confused from how normal things seemed to be. 
“That is the emergency situation.” 
You point to the little bundle resting on your couch, her orbs round and taking in her surroundings with great curiosity. At the mere mention of who exactly is the emergency, Seokjin immediately forgets everything and dashes straight to her. 
“A baby?!” He immediately picks her up, cooing strange noises that you assume is normal. However the baby responds within an instant, glancing up at Seokjin with similar wide curious eyes. 
A soft smile tugs on your lips, well aware that you called in the right person to assist you with the job. 
“Whose is she?” Seokjin asks, spinning around with her in his arms. 
“Yeong Hee’s.” You mention, “I’m supposed to take care of her for the week so that her and Namjoon have the chance to relax and spend time together.” 
“Does she have a name?” 
“Yeona.” You pronounce, the baby immediately fiddling her arms around as if she heard you. The small gesture earns a lop-sided smile from you, but Seokjin turns to you in confusion. 
“Wait, you willingly wanted to take care of her baby?” 
You sigh, “I know what it sounds like but Yeong Hee seemed so stressed. I don’t think I’ve seen her be completely calm since the wedding.” 
Seokjin hums, “I’m completely clueless about babies though, which is why I called you over.” 
“Well, there’s not much to them,” He explains, “They just have three basics ‒ eating, sleeping and cleaning.” 
You nod, placing a hand underneath your chin. Even though you’ve just revealed to him that you’ll need to take care of her, Jin doesn’t seem stressed nor rattled with the news, which in turn grants you a sense of relief for the abrupt responsibility you’ve taken upon yourself. 
“Have you ever done this before?” You wonder, noticing how carefully he holds Yeona. 
“Take care of a baby?” You nod, “One time, my older brother actually had a hard time with his first born so I would just check in on his kids every now and then.”
“But that was more looking after them than being responsible for them.” Jin quickly points out from your relieved expression with a nervous smile, “So I’m still clueless on a couple of things.” 
“That’s okay, it can be a learning experience.” You offer, heading into the direction of your room. “For now, just keep an eye on her while I go google what babies eat.” 
Jin raises his eyebrows, “Yeong Hee didn’t tell you?” 
“More like I didn’t ask.” You meekly confess, “I have some bottles of milk in the fridge from her, but she said that they’ve been trying to feed Yeona solid foods.” 
He looks as surprised as you, “Babies can eat solid food…?”
You glance over your shoulder at him with a knowing smile, “Right?” Shaking your head at the thought, you start typing in multiple searches into your search bar. You’re instantly bombarded with different types of food and multiple articles referencing different age groups. Your eyes roam around the screen, alarmed with the volume of links. 
Jin peers over your shoulder, his and Yeona’s wide eyes sweeping over the screen.
“People really like talking about their kids, don’t they?” 
“Apparently because every single kid is different.” You let out a long regretful exhale, grabbing a piece of paper and a pen, “Looks like it’s time I actually do some of my own research.”
***
After spending loads of time trying to determine what is safe for Yeona to eat from the web, you and Jin ultimately decide that your bare fridge and devoid cabinets were probably not the best way to go about this. 
Standing in an alley flooding with food, you glance around and spot Jin peering into one of the fridges with the trolley next to him. Yeona is in his arms, clearly distracted with her new surroundings as he gazes around. 
Yeona for the most part, is an interesting child. She’s extremely calm and quiet aside from her natural curiosity, giving you hardcore suspicion as to if she was truly her mother’s child. She also clings to Jin non-stop, something you don’t really mind since it grants you some comfort that she’ll constantly be safe. 
Walking up behind him, you steal a glance at the cool container, “Yogurt?” 
Jin hums, “Didn’t you say she could eat small quantities of it?” 
“Sort of.” You shrug, “Yeong Hee told me she’s roughly around nine months old now so maybe we should start off with the basics.” Scanning around the store, you attempt to locate the child friendly sections, “Like baby food and small snacks.” 
“Not a bad idea.” He looks down at Yeona with a smile, who glances back at him in fascination, “Are you sure you don’t want to hold her?” 
“Hm?” Your eyes fall onto Yeona, watching her curiously peer at you with even more fascination. She appears like any other baby would, with adorable squishy cheeks and hands the size of your one finger. The longer you stare at her, the more you can start to see the resemblance she has with her parents, her smile being on par with Namjoon’s dimpled one and her bright brown eyes reminding you of her mother’s when they perk up with excitement. 
Nonetheless, a shiver runs down your back. “Nah….I’m good.” 
Jin understandably nods, following you to the shelves aligned with various amounts of baby food. Skimming over the titles, you’re already wincing, pulling out one glass bottle filled with gooey amounts of dark green. 
“Pea puree baby food?” You have to repress the urge to gag, “Why would they feed kids this?”
Jin takes the bottle from your hand, placing down Yeona to examine it, “Probably because they least expect it and it’s healthy for them.” He scrunches up his nose and hurriedly hands it back to you, “Still sounds pretty disgusting though.” 
He laughs and you shake your head with a small grin. You start plucking out flavours that don’t sound as nearly as unappetizing and start handing them to Jin, who looks them over once before placing them into the cart. 
“Okay, I think that should be enough for one week.” You let out a long sigh, overwhelmed with the new information being spewn at you. You’re about to tell Jin that you should look at some snacks for her as well, but your brows intensely contort once you catch sight of the trolley. 
“Jin?” 
“Yeah?” He’s looking at a pack of some garlic flavoured chips, a pout resting on his lips. 
“Where’s the baby?” 
His head snaps back at you, surprise emitting in his eyes. Then he spins around, his eyes becoming wider the more he realizes that the little human in the trolley has somehow gone missing. 
You and Jin make instant eye contact, realization dipping within a flash before you’re hurriedly breaking apart and scavenging around to locate Yeona. 
“She was just here a minute ago?!” You look between the two alleys, only garnering confused glances from nearby strangers. 
“I could have sworn I put her in the trolley!” Jin professes, bumping into you halfway. An exhale leaves your lips, a hand running against your tensed temples. 
You’ve only been with Yeong Hee’s baby for a day and you’ve already managed to lose her. 
Great parenting, Y/N. 10 out of 10. 
“Oh no.” 
You whirl around at the sound of dismay Jin makes, coming straight into eye contact with Yeona. 
On some lady’s leg. 
“Oh my god.” 
Jin rushes forward immediately, tugging the crawling baby up from the lady who seems at most confused from the sudden child’s appearance. He apologizes profusely to her, but she doesn’t seem to mind and tells him to just be careful next time. 
“I had no idea she could crawl!” You whisper loudly to Jin, who is gasping from the earlier sprint he did at the sight of Yeong Hee’s child clinging to a stranger’s limb.  
“Me neither.” He’s still panting so you offer up your arms to carry her, but Jin shakes his head. 
“Just check out the food we have, so we can go back to your place.” He explains, “I don’t think it’s safe to have her here any longer after discovering how agile she is.”
You nod, a small smile on your lips as you grab your absent trolley. “Now that’s something she definitely shares with her mother.” 
Jin sighs, “Let’s just hope she doesn’t share her father’s clumsiness.” 
Your eyes widen, and he shares a knowing gaze with you. 
***
Heading back to your apartment, you ultimately decide it would be best to take a shot at trying to feed Yeona for the first time. Propping her up onto a chair with a pillow, you grab a small spoon and a bottle of peach baby food. 
You suck in a sharp inhale. 
“You’re just feeding her Y/N.” Jin remarks in amusement, but the corner of your mouth twitches. 
“After that little stunt in the grocery store, I’d better be careful.” Scooping up a mouthful with the spoon, you cautiously press it against her lips. 
To your surprise, Yeona gobbles it up right away. You spin around and gawk at Jin, who shares your look of astonishment as she begins to flail her arms around, anticipating for more. 
“Well that worked a lot better than I could have imagined.” Jin admits, so you try once again with more this time around. Yeona repeats the same action, her wide eyes following the motion of the spoon that lingers in front of her. 
“Yeah…” You whisper surprised, repeating the action again. However this time you flinch when Yeona grabs onto the spoon in your hands, tossing it onto the ground and letting the bright orange splatter all over the ground. 
A groan escapes you and you slump down onto the ground defeated, trying to clean up the mess. Jin gestures for you to keep feeding Yeona and that he’ll take care of it, but your next several attempts prove to be utterly futile. 
Yeona flings the spoon the second time, but with a loud giggle coming from her lips. She then manages to grasp the bottle from your hands the third time, attempting to lick out the contents and getting them smeared all over her cheeks. When you try to clean up, she grabs onto the spoon you were holding and launches it straight for Jin’s head. 
The latter manages to duck in time, but he presses a hand against his heart and stares at the child completely shocked. 
“Is she trying to kill me?!” 
You snort, but Yeona tries to grab the bottle again and you hurriedly swoop it up before she has the chance. 
“I think eating is the last thing on her mind right now.” 
“Here.” Jin advances forward, reaching his hands out, “Let me try.” 
You hand the bottle to him and take a step back, hoping his actions will help things somehow. Although Yeona avoids the spoon whenever Jin tries to feed her, he manages to get successful by feeding her a large spoonful, something that has a smile of relief etching onto your features. 
He subtly coughs over his shoulder and mumbles ‘Leave it all up to the handsome person in the room’. You roll your eyes with a lop-sided smile, expression softening when Yeona finally begins to eat like you had hoped. 
It doesn’t last very long. 
You’re suddenly back to square one when she starts avoiding the food again, but at this point she doesn’t try to grab it or spill something onto the ground for her own joy. She appears pale, delicate features twisting up and lips forming a pout. 
You instantly reach out as Jin continues to try, “Wait Jin‒” 
You’re too late. 
Yeona opens her mouth and out comes something you wish had managed to stay in. Jin immediately staggers back, luckily not getting caught up in the array of spilled contents all over the ground. 
“How did she….!?” Jin whirls around in disbelief, “We didn’t even feed her that much!” 
You pinch your brows together, “I think I read something on the net about kids having weaker stomachs. It takes longer for them to digest food on average.” 
“But what do we do now? She’s barely eaten!” 
“I guess wait it out?” You suggest, suddenly realizing that Jin appears just as stressed out as you. Before you even have the chance to say something comforting, Yeona lets out a small sound. 
It’s similar to a grunt, and you swivel to see her bottom lip starting to quiver. Your eyes instantly enlarge and soon there’s water welling up in her eyes, loud cries flooding into every room of your apartment. 
“She’s crying?!” You exclaim, not quite understanding that the combination of her sudden regurgitation plus you and Jin being stressed had welcomed an uncomfortable atmosphere for her. The problem with this situation though, is the fact that you and Jin are clueless as ever and scrambling to do something to calm her down. 
Jin staggers in front of her chair right away, flailing his arms around and making silly pouty faces at the baby. He manages to capture the young girl’s attention with some of them, drawing out her innate curiosity from her wet eyes with his cute expressions.
You’re baffled by his sudden range of expressions you had no idea he could pull, but then he brings out the iconic ‘peek a boo’ faces and there’s no possible way you can keep down your laughter. 
“Hey, it works with my brother’s kid!” Jin protests in retaliation, but Yeona’s interest is broken with his voice and her cries only escalate in volume. 
While Jin continues to bombard her with more ludicrous faces, an idea surfaces to your mind and you strut over to your fridge, fishing around for the bottles of milk Yeong Hee left you. You grasp onto one and locate the warmer she thankfully left behind, heating it up within minutes. 
Since Yeong Hee said her and Namjoon have been trying to get Yeona to eat solid foods, your natural assumption is that she dislikes them and that trying to adapt to a new habit is as challenging for a baby as it is to an adult. 
The bottle finishes heating up and you hurriedly dash over to Jin, who looks like he’s dangling between the fine line of exhaustion and completely losing it. His eyes spark up at the bottle’s appearance, and he uncaps the top right away, testing it on his palm. 
“Oh.” Your eyes light up in recognition, having forgotten the last crucial step Yeong Hee had taught you before leaving. Jin places the bottles against Yeona’s lips, and she gladly accepts, cries subsided and her eyes become drained. 
You and Jin let out a simultaneous sigh. 
Luckily, Yeona finally calms down. Her bright eyes stay to lull with time and her hands start to droop down from the bottle, so Jin takes the opportunity to put her down on the cradle in your room. He eventually returns after a moment, slumping down onto the couch next to your sagging self. 
In a short and sweet way of saying it, both of you are utterly exhausted. It seems that every decision you need to  make has to have careful consideration and some form of prior knowledge, two areas that you have absolutely no control over and are greatly lacking. 
“Maybe this is what it’s like being a parent.” Jin remarks, “I don’t think I ever used to see my brother or his wife properly relax since having their kid.” 
“Damn, you’re right.” You muse. It all makes sense now, why Yeong Hee always appears so battered and fatigued, why so many of your conversations would derail about how her child was doing and more so, to how she was doing. You didn’t give it much thought before at the time, but it seems like your time with Yeona is going to greatly change all of that. 
***
After some constant pestering and encouragement, you convince Jin that sleeping on the couch for the night wasn’t a good idea for getting proper rest. Truthfully, you find that he’s extremely drained like you, not one of his familiar dad jokes surfacing up when he watches Yeona in her cradle with tired eyes. 
You collapse onto the bed with him, eyes fluttering shut and mind begging for sleep. 
A sharp cry breaks through the silence of the night. 
Your eyes instantly wench open and you spring up, startled to the core from the sound. Your clouded vision looks around until you can locate your clock, the numbers 3:04 am being a friendly reminder of what stage of REM sleep you must have entered. Taking a deep sigh, you pull back your deranged hair and try to shuffle out of the bed. 
A hand stops you, “W-What happened?” 
“Don’t worry, it’s just Yeona,” You remind him, “Go back to sleep, I’ll take care of her.” 
Jin mumbles what you assume to be a low thanks and you get out of the bed completely, peering down into the cradle. Tears stream down Yeona’s eyes and her cries are oddly high in frequency, making you lean down and slowly pick up. 
Truthfully, you’re not even sure if you're holding her properly as your arms stick out in front of you, but you know that you need to calm her down as soon as possible and not ruining any of your boyfriend’s sleep in the process is probably preferred. 
Setting her down carefully on your couch, you attempt to figure out what’s wrong. 
“Did you have trouble sleeping?” You whisper, as if Yeona can understand you, “Are you hungry again?” 
She continues to cry and your frustration increases as you fist your hair into bundles. You are so, so tired and nearly on the verge of falling asleep on the ground that your brain has no clue how to process what she needs properly. 
That’s when you catch a scent of a new smell wafting through the air. 
Instantly, you snap up and dash into your room, grabbing onto the bag Yeong Hee had given you. You rip it open within seconds, hands searching around until they come into contact with a feathery cotton material. 
Your mouth puckers as you twist and turn the diaper around, squinting your eyes through the dark. Taking a second look inside the bag, you search around for a manual or anything Yeong Hee could have left behind in exchange for figuring out how to work the straps around. You decide ultimately that taking your best shot at it would be the way around and you orient the material around Yeona, tossing her old diaper out for the one in your hands. 
It takes about ten minutes for you to finally get it on and ensure it won’t come off, but in that duration Yeona cries have spiked up, ringing through your ears as the tears wouldn’t stop pouring out from her tender eyes. You eventually have to let out a deep exhale once she calms down, rubbing your sore eyes before heading back to your room. 
Once you reach your bed, you collapse down, exhausted beyond belief. 
***
You’re woken to the scent to the scent of pancakes and eggs the next morning. Hauling yourself up the bed, you’re greeted by Yeona and Jin in the kitchen together, the latter holding the baby and attempting his best to feed her. 
Plopping down onto a chair, you muse about the dark circles underneath his eyes, “Looks like someone got off on the wrong side of the bed.” 
Jin cracks out an amused smile, “I’m surprised you think I’m the only one.” 
It’s not too soon when a yawn passes by your lips, serving as a reminder of the eventful night the three of you ended up sharing. After you had changed Yeona and fallen asleep with the hope of getting some shut eye, the mayhem had only begun two hours later. Jin had gotten up this time and tried his best to calm Yeona down, but her cries could be heard through the apartment and kept you wide awake. Luckily he returned once you were about to get up to offer some help, but the moment he fell asleep with you, the vicious cycle continued once again. 
More crying. More not knowing what to do. More loss of sleep. 
You and Jin had tried your best to alternate as much as you could, but your efforts ultimately didn’t end up paying off when you had both woken up this morning still looking like zombies. 
Letting out a sigh from the ill recollection, one of your eyebrows perks up once you smell the air. 
“Hey, Jin.” You ponder, watching him look up at you after successfully feeding Yeona a spoon. 
“Hm?” 
You sniff the air again, this time eyes widening, “Is something burning?”
Jin instantly whirls around, long forgotten those crucial moments he was trying to feed Yeona and heads straight for the stove. You peer behind him when he groans, the lovely view of burnt pancakes and eggs greeting your eyes immediately. 
He pouts, “That was supposed to be our breakfast….” 
You take another glance at the pot and wince. “How about you just take care of Yeona for now and I’ll make something for us.” 
He dumps the contents into the garbage, attempting to scrap one burnt piece of egg off the pan. He lets out a sigh, shoulders slumping down in defeat as he decides to just let the pan sit in water for a while.
His eyes suddenly perk up and he whirls around. 
“What if we just went outside and got some fresh air?” 
***
At Jin’s suggestion, you decide to have a picnic. You were at first wary with the idea, unsure if you were really in the mood for going to the park after a horrendous day and sleep-deprived night, but he manages to convince you that the activity will be beneficial for all three of you, especially Yeona. 
Which is why you’re currently sitting on a red and white checkered blanket and leaning against a tree while watching Jin dress up Yeona in a baby flower sun hat. 
“There we go!” He turns to you in excitement, “What do you think? Doesn’t she look cute?” 
You don’t get a chance to offer an opinion because the hat slips off and Yeona continues to gaze around as if she hadn’t just knocked off five minutes of precious hard work from Jin. He attempts to get it back onto her again, but it continues to fall off. 
“It did look nice before it fell off her head.” You agree to comfort him, but he manages to get it right this time, and he turns to you with the same look of excitement (with an addition of bags underneath his eyes). 
“Ta-dah! Protected from the sun and looks like an adorable angel!” Jin’s enthusiasm draws a smile from you and Yeona seems to reciprocate, wiggling her arms and staring at him with fascinated pupils. 
You enjoy the light breeze as Jin plays around with Yeona, but her eyes soon begin to flutter close and before you know it, she’s falling asleep in his arms. Both of you decide it would be best if she could get some sleep, but after an hour of no response from her, Jin starts to grow dismayed. 
You snort, “We went out for her, but she completely ko’ed on us.” 
“I’m sure she’ll wake up soon.” He stares at Yeona in high hopes, but you wave him off. 
“She’s probably as tired as us from yesterday.” You lean over to grab a packed sandwich, unwrapping it from the plastic. Letting out a long sigh, you catch Jin’s attention, “How did Yeong Hee even manage to do all this…?”
He cranes his head to the side, “What do you mean?” 
You gesture to Yeona, “This. Taking care of a baby and trying to enjoy her marriage at the same time.” You shrug, “It just seems like so much work to me.” 
Jin knowing laughs, “I’m assuming this is probably not helping you with wanting kids, right?” 
“Far from it, actually.” 
He narrows his eyes, “Can I ask you something?” 
You hum, “Why did you even agree to this? You’ve hated kids longer than I can remember.” 
“Well, Yeong Hee sounded like her and Namjoon haven’t had the chance to relax.” You explain, “I wanted her to be happy.” 
Jin nods, like that much he had already guessed. However, you go on to continue, “And well…. I’m the godmother.” 
His eyes widen and your gaze falls onto Yeona, still sleeping in his arms, “I figured I should at least get to know her properly, and since Yeong Hee gave me this responsibility, then I should be able to take care of her when Yeong Hee’s having a hard time.” 
“But things definitely didn’t go the way I expected.” You reminisce, “I didn’t realize there was so much to it and how devoted you have to be.” 
“I agree with you on that.” Jin acknowledges, letting out a small chuckle as if the past couple of incidents had really sent him down a whirlwind. After spending some time in the park with Yeona snoozing away, you and Jin eventually end up heading back with only one single thought in mind. 
How are you going to do this for a week? 
***
Within moments of returning to your apartment, you are pooped. This results in you spending the rest of the evening with Jin in a dire attempt to bring some normalcy from constantly running around yesterday, but you still find yourself considerably paranoid as you consistently check in on Yeona to make sure she’s okay. Jin does so as well, but eventually night falls and you know the two of you are extremely desperate for a long night’s rest. 
“Y/N.” Jin whispers, shaking your shoulder, “Y/N.” 
“Mhm?” You incoherently mumble, peering through your squinted eyes to gaze at his face. Jin lets out a sigh, shaking your form once more. 
“Y/N, wake up. You fell asleep on the couch.” 
You wave him off, finding too much comfort in the pillow you’ve managed to snatch up from the sofa, “It’s fine, just leave me here.” 
He chuckles, but he suddenly presses his hand against your back and under your legs, lifting you up in an instant. You jolt immediately, scrambling to grab support onto something, before finding purchase in securing your arms around his neck. It’s a bit ironic as he carries you to your bedroom, since you’re probably the last person who needs to be babied in the apartment. 
Plopping you down on the mattress, the tiredness in your bones immediately seeps away and you flutter your eyelids close, sleep grabbing a hold of you in an instant. You can feel the other end of the bed dip for a moment and assume Jin has decided to call it a day after settling Yeona down to sleep. 
The comforting silence in your apartment lulls you until you plunge into a deep sleep. 
***
A sharp cry breaks through the walls. 
You jolt in your sleep, drooping eyes cracked with red being wide open and frozen in your position. Another cry resonates through the room, but this time it grows quieter and you mentally pray that it was a mere spur of the moment, nothing more to drag you away from the sweet remains of sleep your body is begging for. 
It’s accompanied by several other acute cries. 
With a low groan, you roll out of the bed, not even bothering to glance at Jin who’s busy snoring away in his own dreamland. Hovering over the cradle, you quickly inspect Yeona, calmly hushing her as to not wake the only person in the room that’s still asleep. Noticing that she didn’t need to be changed, you head over to the kitchen swiftly and grab a bottle from the fridge. 
After heating the bottle to the right temperature and placing a portion of it on the base of your palm, you rush back to her and place it at her bottom lip. Yeona turns away from you, her cries increasing in intensity. 
Frowning, you try again only for her to completely roll away from you this time, ultimately reasoning that she doesn’t want to be fed. You attempt to pull up the blanket Jin had placed on her, but she continues to sway around giving absolutely no response to your actions and persistently crying. 
You’re beginning to grow desperate. It isn’t her diaper, she’s not hungry, and she’s not cold. That means you have the only choice to resort to a different means of matter. 
Widening your eyes, you pinch your cheeks and spread them apart, pushing your tongue out. You know you’ve called Jin out about it already, but at this point you need to stop the insufferable cries flooding your apartment by the minute. 
Yeona doesn’t even notice. 
Thick tears are continuing to roll down her cheeks, eyes remaining glossed over. A patch of hair is fisted within your palm, knees bending down in exasperation when your brain is losing its function more as time passes and you don’t understand what she needs. 
A warm hand places itself on your shoulder, causing you to swirl around with misery leaking into your eyes. 
“Sorry for waking you.” You admit, having the false hope that you could’ve at least figured this out on your own. Jin shakes his head, clearly just as tired as you. 
“We’re in this together.” He comfortingly says, stepping up to glance at Yeona, “Have you tried checking her?” 
You nod, “I’ve checked her, tried feeding her and tried to cover her.” A long sigh leaves your lips, “I even pulled out a silly face too.” 
Jin spins around, gazing at you in surprise, “Really?” 
You solemnly sigh again, “Really.” 
“Well, let’s see…” Jin hovers over her cradle, attempting to calm her down by making cute noises and widening his eyes. You plant yourself against the wall, shoulders slumping down further into defeat as Yeona’s cries seem to only increase in intensity. There’s a certain wail that gets to you, snapping your fine control of patience after having another decent night of rest snatched away from your clutches. 
“What’s wrong?” You plead, questioning the crying baby as if she can answer you. “Just tell me, give me a signal, anything.” Voice slightly cracking and eyes glossing over, you wonder how long it’s going to be until you join her in her crying fit. “What do you need, Yeona??” 
“Y/N...” Jin immediately tries to intervene, understanding your frustration. He places a hand on your shoulder, attempting to get you to back away. “You need to calm down, we can’t figure this out if you keep asking her questions like that.” 
“But I am calm!” Although your words suggest it, Jin already knows the sleep deprivation is beginning to take its toll. At the sound of both of your tones, Yeona bursts into more tears, startling you. “Oh no, Yeona…” 
You drop your voice down into a soothing one, abruptly plucking the baby up from her cradle in a dire attempt. Even though her high-pitched sobs threaten to make your ears bleed from the proximity, Yeona soon lets out a quiet hiccup much to your own surprise. 
You can only stare at Jin with a dropped jaw as Yeona settles her head against your shoulder, her small hands tightly fisting onto the material of your shirt. She sniffles a couple more times and squirms around a bit, but it’s right before she finally settles down and welcomes sleep in your arms. 
The apartment falls into a comfortable silence after a period of absolute chaos, the baby in your arms appearing more content than you have ever seen her. 
“Way to go, Y/N!” Jin cheers, peering at Yeona over your shoulder. 
“T-Thanks…” You mumble half-heartedly, taking occasional glances to confirm Yeona was still asleep on you. You attempt to rock her back and forth, eyes widening when a small yawn slips by her lips, and she nestles in closer to you. 
Unconsciously, a soft smile makes its way to your lips. 
***
“Morning.” You walk behind Jin into the kitchen, rummaging around the fridge for something to eat. Yeona is in his arms, bright eyes glancing around in contrast to yesterday’s sudden storm. 
“Morning.” Jin replies with a smile, tiling his head to the side, “You seem well rested.” 
You smirk, “For once.” Walking over to him, you lean down to poke Yeona’s cheek, “But this one appears to missing her mom more than I thought.” 
“Hopefully her and Namjoon got to enjoy their mini vacation.” Jin exhales, carefully pushing Yeona up in his arms when she begins to slip. “They became parents a little fast, don’t you think?” 
You shrug, “Yeong Hee was pretty excited to start a family of her own, but I don’t think she was completely ready to have kids after she found out she was pregnant at their honeymoon.” A long exhale passes by you, a crease forming between your brows, “You know, I did say that her and Namjoon should seriously consider their options before having kids.” 
Jin playfully smiles, “Are you sure that wasn’t just you warning your friend about the woes of having children?” 
“That’s‒…” You pout and Jin’s smile widens, knowing that he got you with that point. “You know what I mean, they should have waited it out before deciding to create a miniature version of themselves,” You scrunch up your nose, “One that at least didn’t make them want to cry with her.” 
Jin hums in agreement but a giggle breaks through your silence. Your eyes warily glance down, only to see Yeona peering at the two of you with a giant smile on her lips. 
“Did she just laugh?” You question as Yeona brightly gazes at you. 
“Maybe she agrees with you.” Jin offers, but you shake your head. 
“I’m literally scolding her parents!” You lean closer, placing your hands on your knees and narrowing your eyes, “Did you know your mom set me up on a blind date once and the guy never showed up in the end?” 
Yeona giggles again, this time clapping her hands together and you’re astounded, a smile working its way onto your lips. 
“Hey, you have me now!” Jin pouts, making you snort. 
“I don’t know what’s cuter, her laughing at my complaints with her mother or you getting offended from one blind date that never showed up, might I mention again!” You raise a finger at him in protest. 
“Yeong Hee just wanted you to be happy too, that’s why she forced you to go on a date with me, remember?” 
“Right, because she knew you were going to be her daughter’s future babysitter.” You sarcastically retort, leaning closer to Yeona. “Your mother’s kind of weird in some ways but I guess I snagged a real catch, huh?”
Yeona giggles again and you tenderly smile, affectionately poking her cheek. Jin on the other hand, is already smiling simply from watching you interact. 
“Oh! If you’re responding to my complaints, I should try something.” You stand right in front of her, looking at the baby dead serious in the eyes, “I don’t really like kids.” 
Something overcomes the baby, and she starts erratically waving her arms, like she wanted to be closer to you. Jin raises an eyebrow, cautiously lifting her closer to you as if he was giving you the chance to refuse. A small smile works on your lips and you hold onto her, watching her grow comfortable in your embrace. 
You look up at Jin and he smiles at you, ecstasy on his features. 
You suppose having Yeona around for a week wouldn’t be so bad. 
***
Despite the fact that you didn’t know what to expect for the rest of the week in regards to Yeona, you’re surprised to find that time flies by faster than you know it and the pending day of her return is soon looming over you. 
The past couple of days haven’t been much of a whirlwind. You and Jin found that you had started becoming used to the little bundle’s presence often and even possessed sense at times that you didn’t know existed there in the first place. Whether it was knowing when to feed Yeona and change her, to moments in the night where you found yourself automatically waking up to check in despite losing time on your clock for sleep. In many ways, her existence surprises you greatly, as you never knew that you could come so close to being this attentive after proclaiming your natural despise towards the little ones. 
Regardless, all good things eventually have to come to an end and it’s a fact you have to inevitably accept when Yeong Hee is showing up at your doorstep once again, but this time with a warm smile on her face. 
“Y/N!” 
She immediately embraces you into a bear hug, something she hasn’t done in years. You’re puzzled by the action for a moment, frozen in place until you ultimately reciprocate and give her a smile. 
“Nice to see you so cheery, Yeong Hee.” 
She separates from you with a grateful look, “It was all thanks to you Y/N, you have no idea how much me and Namjoon needed this!” 
You chuckle, “Believe me, I do.”��
Yeong Hee glances around the apartment, her curious eyes inspecting around. 
“Where is my little Yeona?” 
You smile, pointing over to the couch where Jin is. He had ironically fallen asleep while rocking Yeona to sleep, so you decided it would be best not to disturb the two. 
Yeong Hee plants her palms against her cheeks, hearts practically steaming from her eyes. 
“Aw!” She slowly steps closer, a radiant smile on her lips. “That’s so cute.” 
You hum in agreement and Yeong Hee spins around, shifting closer to you. “I know you didn’t want to have kids anytime soon, but…” 
She points over to Yeona and Jin together with a soft smile, “If that man is able to bond with our child, then I think he’s definitely ready for anything coming his way.” 
You chuckle at that, recalling how catastrophic both of you initially were around Yeona and freaking about the smallest of things that more parents would have found normal. However, that’s when you remember how things were once you’ve become familiar around her, your actions automatically reflecting her needs when you were just confused a couple of days ago. 
Along with that, Yeona herself had seemed to take a particular liking to you. 
“I know that’s what I said in the past, but I dunno.” You shrug, “Kids aren’t so bad.” 
Yeong Hee immediately whirls around, gaping at you shell shocked. You raise an eyebrow at her blatant staring, only for her to murmur a sentence that has you laughing on the inside. 
“Does this mean...my angel convinced you otherwise?”
“Oh she’s nothing but an angel,” You openly admit, pressing a finger to your lips, “She’s a lot more like her mom now I think about it.” 
Yeong Hee laughs at that and you smile, your attention being drawn away when you notice Jin rising from your couch. 
“Oh Seokjin!” Yeong Hee exclaims, “It's great to see you again!” 
“Same to you.” Jin warmly smiles, before placing the now awake baby in her mother’s arms. Yeona’s eyes are open but she seems puzzled, as if confused as to what was going on. 
“Hey Yeonie~ It’s mom!” Yeong Hee coos and Yeona’s eyes are still tracing over her features. You peer over her shoulder, a remark instinctively making its way to your lips. 
“Maybe she just hasn’t seen you so relaxed instead of stressed out for once.” 
Yeong Hee frowns at you, but Yeona lets out a loud giggle. Yeong Hee stares at the baby in her arms baffled, whirling around to face you. 
“You made her laugh!” You smile, nodding, “I’m impressed, Y/N!” 
An embarrassed chuckle leaves you, “I guess she I’m not as bad as I thought around kids.”
“Well, I think you did an excellent job.” Yeong Hee envelopes you into a giant hug, a smile reappearing on your lips when Yeona giggles again. 
Yeong Hee says goodbye and eventually departs contently, leaving you and Jin alone together in the apartment. 
He nudges your shoulder, “Hey, I heard you guys talking.” 
You turn around to face him, and he sways back and forth, eyes gleaming, “Do you think...maybe not now, but in the future,” He quickly clarifies, “The idea of having kids isn’t too far…?” 
A soft smile makes its way to your lips, “It isn’t.” Jin immediately perks up, a giant smile breaking onto his features. 
“But.” You wave a finger at him, stopping him in his tracks, “After taking care of Yeona this past week, I definitely need some off time before considering the idea.”
“Oh, I’m so with you on that.” Jin exhales, “Let’s think about it when we’re actually ready.” 
You warmly smile, “Deal.” 
175 notes · View notes
sincerelyella · 3 years ago
Text
Always Remember Us This Way Part 2
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Book: The Royal Heir (AU)
Pairings: Liam x MC (Ella); Drake x OC (Alyssa Devereaux Walker)
Song Inspiration: Always Remember Us This Way by Lady Gaga
Characters belong to Pixelberry; MC Queen Ella Rys and Malia Rys belong to me; Alyssa Walker belongs to the amazing @burnsoslow and used with permission in this series.
Catch up here
A/N: In celebration of King Liam and Queen Ella’s baby girl being born in TRH2 I wanted to write something to commemorate it (kinda). Some things are canon, but don’t expect it to follow the book much.
Big thank you to @burnsoslow for reading over this and editing and making suggestions so I don’t sound like a crazy person.
Warnings: TW: angst; TW: blood; TW: childbirth complications; TW: possible major character death. There are mentions of real medical emergencies and procedures, if this is a trigger for you please don’t read any further. Also, I do not work in a maternity unit at my hospital so please excuse any inaccuracies.
Words: 2481
Liam sat in the corner of the suite that was originally assigned to Ella in the maternity unit. He sat next to his newborn daughter, Malia, occasionally checking on her if she whined or cried. The nursing staff had started checking on both him and Malia, feeding her formula or changing her diaper. He was thankful for the help since he couldn’t seem to function. He hardly spoke to anyone, he didn’t call anybody; all he could do was sit and stare at Malia.
He kept thinking about Ella; the last time he saw her smile, the last time he kissed her mouth, the last words she said to him, the last time he heard her sing.
So when I’m all choked up, And I can’t find the words
Every time we say goodbye, Baby, it hurts
It had been about an hour or so since he last saw his wife, he couldn’t get the last image of her out of his mind. She was extremely pale, unconscious, with her mouth open. Her beautiful face looked so … lifeless. Liam leaned forward in his chair, hands covering his face as he started to sob. He didn’t know how long he sat there crying; his whole body heaved as he tried to suck in air. She made me promise to save our baby. He knew this is what she would have wanted, but why? He wiped his hands on his jeans and looked at Malia again, reaching over to touch her little body. Somehow, being close to his baby girl made him feel closer to her mother, and it gave him some peace. “I’m sorry I let you down, princess,” he whispered shakily as he tried to hold back a sob. “It wasn’t supposed to happen like this. We were supposed to be happy together. We were supposed to take you … home … ” he trailed off and sucked in a breath to hold in the tears.
When you look at me, And the whole world fades
I’ll always remember us this way
Suddenly, his phone rang in his pocket. He pulled it out and saw Drake’s face on the caller ID. He swiped to answer and just held the phone to his ear, unable to say the words.
“Li?”
Liam mustered all the energy he could, but his voice still cracked as he spoke. “Drake.”
“Liam. What’s going on?” Drake could sense it; he heard the wavering in Liam’s response. Something wasn’t right, and his best friend had never called him and Alyssa after leaving for the hospital. He heard Liam’s erratic breathing on the other end of the phone. “Liam! What is it? Is it the baby?”
Liam broke down on the phone. He couldn’t speak; he just cried and didn’t give a damn who heard him. He could vaguely hear Drake on the other end panicking, then hanging up abruptly. Liam let the phone fall from his ear to the floor. I shouldn’t have answered that.
**
Drake hastily hung up on Liam. Why did no one call me?! What the fuck is happening? Drake fumbled with the phone. His mind was going a mile-a-minute after hearing his best friend lose control of his emotions. The always stoic king wouldn’t just display his emotions like that in public ... unless it had something to do with his family. He wasn’t sure what to think or how bad it was going to be. He dialed Bastien’s number and waited … and waited … and waited. He growled, cursing under his breath as he hung up.
“Drake? Why are you growling? Did you get in touch with Liam?” Alyssa walked out from the bedroom, seeing her husband’s panic stricken face, and her eyes widened. “What’s going on? Is it the baby?!”
“I-I don’t know! I called Liam and he …” he trailed off, trying to swallow the lump in his throat.
“He what?” Alyssa’s heart filled with dread, the pregnancy hormones didn’t help matters. She hastily walked to her him and placed her hands on his cheeks to look at her. Her husband rarely cried, and right now, he was very close to it.
“I don’t know, Lyss,” he whispered. “I asked … about the baby … and he completely lost it on the phone.”
Alyssa gasped, her hand flying to her mouth, eyes immediately watering. “Oh my God, do you think it’s Ella? We have to go!”
Drake sprang up from the couch and fell into step with his wife who rushed to the front door. He grabbed his keys from the kitchen island, and the pair made their way to the truck to head for the hospital.
**
There was a knock on the door of the maternity suite, and Liam snapped his head up, opening his eyes. He blinked to refocus and saw Dr. Ramirez standing there, studying him with a worried look. Liam stood abruptly, trying to wake himself up. “I-I’m sorry … I must have fallen asleep.” He wrinkled his brow. “Where is my wife?”
Dr. Ramirez stepped forward. “Her Majesty was bleeding profusely. I apologize if you were removed from the room but- ”
“It’s fine, doctor, but my wife?” He punctuated the last few words. “I want …” He took a breath in and let it out slowly to control the overwhelming emotion building in his chest. “I … need … to see her.” He didn’t want words right now; he just wanted to see Ella.
Dr. Ramirez nodded in understanding. “I can take you to her now; the nurses will watch Malia here.”
Liam nodded and turned to Malia before leaving. “Daddy will be back soon; I love you.” He gently kissed his daughter on the forehead before following Dr. Ramirez to the intensive care unit, Bastien following close behind.
As they walked, Liam turned to Bastien.
“Your Majesty?”
“Please have guards outside of Malia’s room.”
Bastien nodded, “Yes, sir.”
Once they reached the ICU, Liam was taken to a large area that had no patients. “Why are all the rooms empty?”
“This wing has been cleared out so that Her Majesty is the only one here.”
Liam nodded, his anxiety rising as they got closer to a single area of the unit that looked like it was occupied.
Dr. Ramirez stopped in front of a door with a guard standing outside of it and turned to Liam. “She is stabilized for now; however, we admitted her here so we can watch her closely. I just wanted to warn you, Your Majesty” - Dr. Ramirez placed a hand on Liam’s arm to get him to look at her - “She has a lot of wires around her, she’s getting medication and blood, and she isn’t awake yet. It might be a little … overwhelming for you.”
Liam nodded and waved his hand so the guard would move. He slowly turned the knob and peered inside. He felt tears of joy, relief, and the pain from being so close to losing her fall from his eyes as he walked towards the bed and grasped her small hand in his. Liam leaned over to kiss her lips, cheeks, forehead … any part he could reach, he kissed. “I thought I lost you, I love you, don’t leave me again,” he whispered in between kisses. He vowed to himself that he would never take another day with her, his family, for granted.
He finally sat back in the chair next to the bed, put their intertwined hands on his forehead and thanked God she was still there with him.
A knock pulled him out of his moment and Dr. Ramirez walked inside. “Your Majesty, are you ready for me to answer some questions now?”
“Y-yes, I’m sorry … I just needed to … see her,” he croaked as the lump grew in his throat.
“I understand; please don’t apologize.” She pulled a chair up to sit in front of him. “So I’ll explain what happened. You can ask me whatever comes to your mind.”
Liam nodded.
“Her Majesty had a retained placenta. This means that the sac that held Malia was supposed to come out just a little while after Malia was born. But in Her Majesty’s case, it didn’t. A small piece of it was attached to the wall of her uterus.”
“How … did that happen?”
“Unfortunately, the causes are still unknown. There are risk factors for it, but she didn’t have any of them when I was seeing her throughout her pregnancy. The only thing that I can think of was that her labor was somewhat long and extremely difficult for her. That could have played a factor.”
“Okay, so she’s not bleeding right now?”
“Well, after childbirth she will be bleeding; that’s normal. The problem was that her placenta needed to be removed and that area cauterized. We gave her medication to stop the hemorrhage from that area. She was bleeding entirely too much, so much so that her blood pressure dropped to a dangerous level and her heart rate spiked.”
“Is that why she was …” His eyes welled up again, and he clenched his jaw to stop them from falling. “Is that why she was … unconscious and pale?”
Dr. Ramirez nodded. “Yes, the blood loss made her pass out, and that’s the reason her blood pressure was so low. She had a lot less blood volume in her body than normal, and her heart was beating faster to compensate.”
Liam nodded again.
“She has a blood transfusion going right now. We’ll see how she does with that and recheck her.”
“When do you think she’ll … wake up?”
“It’s hard to say, her vitals are stable right now; and we took her off oxygen a little bit ago.”
“Thank you … so much for saving … my wife.” His voice hitched at his last words, and he cleared his throat. “I thought I’d lost her …”
“Please don’t thank me, Your Majesty. This is my job, and it’s an honor to be her doctor.” She gave him a small smile. “She means a lot to all of us as well.” Liam smiled in understanding. His wife took the hospital on as her personal project when she became queen. She made it her mission to assist with quality assurance and worked with many doctors and nurses to improve hospital flow and policies. Dr. Ramirez paused and cleared her throat before she got emotional. “Now, you know how to get in touch with me should you have any questions or concerns?”
“Yes, thank you.”
Dr. Ramirez curtsied and left the room, while Bastien poked his head inside. “I’m sorry about this, sir, but Drake has called me nonstop. What do you want me to tell him?”
“I’ll call him and tell him what happened.”
Bastien nodded and closed the door behind him.
**
Drake and Alyssa ran into the hospital, looking for the maternity unit.
“There!” Drake yelled and they rushed to the front desk.
“Excuse me,” Alyssa said, out of breath, to the secretary at the desk. “We’re here to see Queen Ella. We know she went into labor earlier this morning.”
“How are you related to Her Majesty?”
“We are her best friends, practically family. I expect you’ll see us on the security clearance list.” Alyssa said in a firm tone, setting her lips in a hard line. “King Liam hasn’t been answering our calls. W-we need to see her!” Her voice cracked, the tears in her eyes threatening to fall.
Drake gently held his wife and rubbed her shoulders.
“I need to check with protocol, ma’am. I’m very sorry about this, but … the royal family have certain security measures in place.” The secretary gave them an apologetic look.
“It’s fine, thank you. We’ll wait over here,” Drake coaxed his wife to sit on one of the chairs in the family waiting area.
“We’re her family, Drake.” Alyssa wailed. “We should be able to see her!”
“Shhh, I know, but if something happened to her or the baby, they’re going to be extremely cautious.” He regretted his words immediately as he watched Alyssa begin to cry into her hands. He pulled her into his arms and stroked her back as he let her cry.
“D-did you try … calling Bastien … again?” she sniffled into his chest.
“I’ll try again, baby,” he assured her, as he dug into his pocket, fishing for his phone. He pressed Bastien’s number and hoped that damn man answered his phone this time.
“Drake.” He heard Bastien’s lowered voice on the other end of the line.
“Bastien! What the fuck is going on? Why haven’t you answered my calls?!” Drake forgot where he was as he shouted; his voice carried through the halls.
“I’m sorry, Drake, but we … didn’t have any answers and His Majesty was-”
Drake sighed in frustration. “Just … where is he, Bastien? Where is Ella? And the baby?”
Drake heard a beeping on his phone and looked down to see that Liam was calling him. “Bas, Liam is calling-”
“You need to answer that.” Bastien promptly hung up, and Drake answered Liam’s call.
“Li. Where are you? Lyss and I are here in the maternity unit.”
He heard his brother sigh on the other end of the phone. “I’m in the ICU … with Ella.”
“Th-the … what?!”
“I’ll explain everything when you get here. We’re on the fourth floor.”
“We’re on the way.” He hung up and slowly met Alyssa’s stare.
“What did he say?”
Drake took a deep breath in and let it out. “Liam is on the fourth floor-”
“Why? What’s on the fourth floor?”
He paused for a moment, looking at his wife. “He’s in the ICU … with Ella.”
Alyssa’s jaw went slack. “THE ICU?!” Faster than he had ever seen her, she bolted up and ran for the elevator, pressing the button repeatedly.
“Alyssa.” Drake grabbed her hand and held it. “Don’t panic! It’s not good for you or our baby.”
“Don’t panic? Do you know what the ICU is?!” Her lower lip trembled.
“Liam actually was able to actually speak without crying, Lyssa,” he said, trying to calm her down. “I’m hoping that means things are better than they were when I first talked to him.”
The elevators dinged open and they both filed in, pressing the button for the fourth floor. As soon as the elevator doors reopened, Alyssa raced to the nurse’s station.
“We’re here for Queen Ella; the King called us!” Alyssa panted, gripping the counter tightly.
Drake grabbed her quickly and pulled her to him.
“Hey guys.”
Drake and Alyssa turned to see Liam, standing there with puffy, bloodshot eyes, shirt wrinkled and untucked, and his hair disheveled … like he had been running his hands through it all day.
“Wh-where is she, Liam?”
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christinesficrecs · 5 years ago
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The longer list of Valentine’s Day Fic Recs is here. I failed spectacularly at making this one shorter because...fluffy fics!!!! 
I've been the archer (I've been the prey) by dearericbittle (dutchmoxie) 16.4K
Stiles is usually pretty good at being a Cupid - not as good as Allison, she’s much better with a bow. His targets fall in love naturally, with just a little nudge or a visit from a mischievous Cupid to make them see what’s already there. Derek Hale, however? Seems to be immune. And that’s just unacceptable - Stiles has to do something about that.
un-Valentine’s by decideophobia | 3.8K
Derek is committed, yes. He’s also a fucking moron.
OR, in which Derek eggs the Stilinski house and gets caught.
Little Dash Of Pink by AsagiStilinski | 4.7K
Derek always thought those stories he heard about male pregnancies in his family were just old wives' tales and bad jokes
Suddenly, that's no longer true, and he's not too sure how to tell his husband
Admire Me by Veera_Kara | 2.7K
In which the pack thinks Stiles and Derek are dating, and are pretty confused as to why they both keep saying they're not doing anything for Valentine's Day. Which makes no sense, unless… they're fighting. So the pack decides to take matters into their own hands.
Never sign a Valentine with your own name by Marishna | 2.6K
“What do I get Kira for Valentine’s Day?”
Stiles blinked and dropped his hands down his sides. “That’s your big crisis?”
aka: Why is Stiles everyone's Valentine's day guru?
Never Learned to Go Slow | 14,492
In which Stiles is misery, and Derek is company. Or something.
Spin Cycle by ladyblahblah | 2,050
Stiles leaves his red sweatshirt in the washer and turns all of Derek’s underwear pink. A romantic comedy ensues.
The Valentine You Need by lielabell | 2,119
On February thirteenth, Stiles comes home to find a bright red envelope taped to the center of his apartment door.
Kiss Me Under the Light of a Thousand Stars by alisvolatpropiis | 5,631
In which Stiles' Valentine's Day love spell goes very wrong.
Or perhaps very right.
Lucky That I'm Yours Every Day by stilinskisparkles | 6,772
Derek doesn't see how Valentine's Day can get any better than a normal day with Stiles.
Choices by blacktofade | 4,846
Stiles receives a box of chocolates for Valentine's Day. Unfortunately, the chocolates end up containing trace amounts of love potion.
Knot As Expected by Trelkez | 3,993
"Congratulations," Lydia said, shoving a bouquet of flowers at Stiles. "You have a date for Valentine’s Day."
I Hate Dates by justiceandmight | 4,366
Stiles just wants to ask Derek to the Valentine's Day dance. Is that so much ask? Apparently, it is.
Sending Nice by  LadyDrace | 1.9K
Stiles sends Derek flowers. 
Fight Me Valentine by  smokesforsterek | 7.8K
The one where Stiles comes up with a plan to have a Big Dramatic Break Up™ at a restaurant on Valentine’s Day. Derek agrees to help.
Fifty Bucks in Roses by  alocalband | 1.5K
There are roses on Derek’s doorstep.
No note. No scent trail. After determining that there is nothing inherently magical or deadly about them, he spends the entire rest of the day researching symbolism and archaic demon customs, trying to figure out what kind of death threat he’s just been handed.
Be Mine, Valentine | 2.6K
In which the Hales own a flower shop, Stiles is a returning customer, and Derek’s heart is big enough for the both of them.
To See Heaven in a Wild Flower by  ChildOfTheRevolution | 2.9K
Working in a florist on Valentine’s Day was like working in a gun shop during the zombie apocalypse. Very loud, very busy and the very real threat of death especially for anyone who worked at said florist when they were desperately running out of red roses.
It's Simple Stoichiometry by  calrissian18 | 2.6K
Derek’s eyes stray around Stiles’ room. His wall calendar is on April. Of last year. He might not have a great grip on what day it is. Or what year.
Back To The Place Where We First Met by  tabbytabbytabby | 1.1K
When Derek shows up at Stiles’ house and asks Stiles to come with him Stiles doesn’t think anything of it. If he’s honest he completely forgot it was even Valentine’s Day. It takes a walk through the preserve and a surprise picnic for things to click into place.
Code Sea Witch by  ANTchan | 4.9K
At Lydia Martin’s Nereid Crown they have a code: “Somebody asked for the Sea Witch.”
Cards on the Table by  S_Horne | 3.4K
Stiles goes to Derek's on Valentine's Day and misreads the situation
Cupid's Rejects by  alisvolatpropiis | 1.5K
Stiles has had his fair share of terrible Valentine’s Days, but this one, quite literally, takes the damn cake. Years of yearning after unrequited crushes, rejected prom proposals, and returned flowers have nothing on sitting half-naked the Emergency Room covered in hives, his throat starting to close up, his tongue the size of Buick.
That sonofabitch Saint Valentine wasn’t tortured nearly enough, Stiles thinks ruefully.
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art-of-love-and-war · 5 years ago
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Hello! Can I request Angst Nobunaga ×MC where MC is pregnant and at the labour time she finds difficulties and barely survives but gives birth to a healthy baby .Thanks in advance
All our days
Pairing: Nobunaga Oda x Reader
Rating: Everyone
Word count: 1403 words    
Warning/s: Pregnancy themes, mentions of blood, very slight angst.
Notes: Hello everybody! Please remember that my inbox is always open if anyone would like to request something!
Inspiration: All our days by Casey Lee Williams
Then one day, you arrived. I heard your angel cry. Helpless, small, and perfect. Welcome to your life.
You were having sweet dreams, walking on clouds.
Yet it became distant as your beautiful dream faded and you woke up feeling a sudden and quite painful kick from your belly.
‘They are kicking.’ You thought, trying to focus your sight in the darkness of the tenshu.
As you were approaching the end of your pregnancy, the child you were carrying got more insistent inside you, moving and kicking as if they knew they were going to come out soon.
This time it had been different, your body felt too heavy as you struggled to sit up as you felt another kick. A whimper left your lips, waking your husband up.
“What’s the matter?” He asked, sitting up next to you with concern clear in his eyes, reaching with a gentle hand to brush your hair back behind your ear.
“I don’t know…” you rested your hands on your stomach. “They are kicking too hard this time.”
On a normal night, you’d wake up for a few minutes some nights, but something deep inside you told you that it would be difficult to go back to sleep tonight.
With a small huff, you tried to stand up and Nobunaga quickly stood before you to help you on your feet to make sure you didn’t fall. “I’ll have someone bring you something to drink.”
“No, no,” you held his hand, smiling softly. “It’s too late; I don’t want to bother anyone now. I just want to move for a little bit.”
You knew he had been on edge for the past weeks and that he tried his hardest to finish his work to tend your needs and take care of you and your unborn child. You were grateful for it and appreciated his and everyone’s efforts.
Servants, vassals, and guards all kept an eye out for you. The other seamstresses you were friends with openly told you to take a break and not push yourself to work on your pending commissions for your well-being and your child’s.
You brought your hand to rest over your belly, smiling.
‘You aren’t born yet, little one. We all care for you and want to meet you soon.’ You thought to yourself as you walked towards the balcony to watch the full moon in its entire splendor.
Nobunaga walked up behind you, setting a haori over your shoulders and then wrapping his arms around you to keep you warm. 
“You are smiling.” He observed with a soft smile of his own adorning his lips, carnelian eyes bright and soft.
You leaned comfortably against his broad chest with a sigh of content. “I was just thinking about them.” Your smile widened at the memory of you thinking that three months before going back to your time would seem like an eternity, but know these eight –almost nine—months passed by in a blink of an eye.
Nobunaga hummed, resting his chin on your shoulder to place a kiss on your cheek. “It won’t be long before they come.”
You nodded happily, nuzzling him as you stood in comfortable silence, watching the moon for a while.
Another kick, stronger than the past few, almost made you jump.
The thoughts that your child was only restless and having a bad night were replaced when the pain in your lower back became unbearable, and then you felt…wetness, growing between your legs.
You looked down, expecting to find that your water had broken, but your sleeping robes were not stained with the clear liquid.
It was blood.
You felt nothing but panic, fearing that this child, your child, would be lost before seeing the world, and as you turned you could see it in Nobunaga’s eyes too, that liquid fear that ran through your veins and filled your mind with the worst of thoughts.
He called your name, holding you securely in his arms before carefully lifting you off your feet.
You clung for dear life to him, fighting the fear and the pain as he took you through the hallways until you could no longer resist the agony you had been holding back.
The painful wail that you let out certainly woke all of Azuchi up.
[*]
He had been waiting outside the room for hours now after the midwife had dismissed him, even if he demanded on staying with you.
The night had been insanely long, making him think that he was trapped inside the most horrible of hells, all of his deeds had caught upon him and his punishment was listening to your pain through the screen door without the power to do anything to stop your suffering.
Even if he didn’t show it, he was dying a little inside, knowing that your life and the life of your child could be at stake, that he could lose both of you. It terrified him to no end and he could feel himself growing colder and colder.
If he paid enough attention and listened carefully, he could hear nothing in the castle, as if time itself had stopped.
Hideyoshi and company had arrived not long after and had stayed with him like silent guardians, voicing their concern for your health until morning rose completely, and they had left him in solitude to fill his place for the day as you were the only thing in his mind.
He battled his exhaustion on this so-called emergency day off, just listening to your panting and soft cries.
Time slowed down for him once more, as a sudden silence took over. Every hair in his body stood up in alert as he waited in this hell of uncertainty.
Fearing the worst, he stood up, slowly reaching for the door with a shaky hand, knowing that you could be gone, knowing that everything he had built with you could collapse.
He stopped when he heard a small muffled whine, followed by a very loud cry.
He bolted and almost kicked the door at the sound, knowing that he almost had pushed one of the women assisting you as he made his way to you in a hurry.
You smiled widely with exhaustion, sweaty everywhere, probably fighting to keep your eyes open.
“Nobunaga!”
“Fireball!” He couldn’t contain the emotion in his voice, falling on his knees before you and cupping your face in his hands to place a needy kiss to your lips and then your forehead, brushing the wet strands of hair away from your flushed face.
You giggled, letting him eye you and hold you to make sure you were okay
The midwife finally approached you, after cleaning the crying baby and wrapping them in a blanket for you to hold. She bowed respectfully to you, offering you the small baby. “My lady, you had a healthy baby boy.” 
She bowed low to the floor as you reached for your child, looking at him for the first time. 
The moment you cradled him in your arms, his little cries slowly ceased, whimpering and seeking the warmth of your chest.
You looked at Nobunaga, who had his eyes set on the little human now resting against you.
That panic and the fear that came with the darkness of the night was now gone. The child now swaddled in your arms, pressed against your chest…it was something so natural and pure that every bit of darkness and fear of death was cast back from the strength of the light he radiated. You were holding life.
Nobunaga pressed a kiss to your brow, leaning his head against yours as he reached to caress his son’s face with his fingers, gently grazing his soft, velvety skin with his calloused hand.
You saw how his eyes suddenly were brimming with life and light, bliss and everything that could possibly make him feel whole, like a new man, seeing his heir…His son.
Your child.
His family.
He trembled when he reached to hold him. Yet, Nobunaga resisted, deciding to wraps his arms around you and press another loving kiss to your face.
“Thank you.” He muttered, voice thin and almost broken, but he still resisted, having to be strong, but you heard the emotional strain on his voice.”I won’t ever let you leave my side again.”
Nobunaga can only look down at the little boy in your arms and just feel... overwhelmed by emotion and the pain and fear of losing it all and everything just vanishing into a dream. 
He can’t lose you, he won’t allow himself for harm to come your way.
He had made himself that promise to protect you since the moment you conquered his heart, and now he promised he would be stronger to protect what you had built together with determination and love.
Nobunaga would take care of you, and your son for as long as he breathed.
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gospelofme · 4 years ago
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A.S.S
Bonus Kix x Female Reader
Hey, underagers....this one......is okay for you to read!!! But it touches on birth and such.
AU obviously, because this is what they deserved!!
You opened your eyes, your gaze focusing on the wall of the cabin, Kix was behind you, he always needed to sleep close to the door. It was late and it was quiet. You figured that was why you had woken up. Sometimes when it was too quiet, it was hard to sleep. A sudden soft snore made your heart flutter, but it wasn’t from fright. You knew your husband was sleeping comfortably when he sighed like that. You rolled over from your right side to your left, your face was close to Kix’s back. He was closer to you than normal, and the reason made you smirk. You carefully raised up and looked over Kix to see your daughter sleeping soundly, clutching her fathers left arm to her chest. Kix’s right arm was under his head as usual.
Both of your kids were definitely attached to their father. Jesse was older now, so he didn’t crawl into bed with you as much. But Kaia was still at that age where she needed her parents closeness at times. It didn’t bother you that they preferred to sleep close to their dad, you had gotten all the cuddles and snuggles when they were infants and toddlers, and when Kix was away. Now however, they were at age where they noticed when their father left for long periods of time on deployments. They had experienced kids in their classrooms being removed mid-lesson because their parent wasn’t coming home. It was an unspoken thing. The principal would be at the door accompanied by the kid’s surviving parent. The kid would get up and leave and all the other kids just knew. No one had to explain anything to them.
You found yourself thinking back to when you had first told Kix you were pregnant with Jesse. You hadn’t told him right away, you wanted to be 100% sure. You both had been trying for a solid year and you didn’t want to give him any more false hope. Once it was confirmed by your OBGYN, you told him. After he was done freaking out, hugging you, kissing you, and re-reading the report from your physician (you didn’t understand half of what was on that anyways), he made the announcement that he wanted to help deliver the baby! That surprised you, but you knew he knew how to deliver a baby. It was part of the training he received as a medic, just in case there was an emergency civilian situation while deployed.
As the pregnancy progressed, he went to as many appointments and Lamaze classes with you as he could. But he was deployed twice during those months, he managed to be there 4 out of the 9 months you were pregnant. You then went to appointments and the classes on your own, until you happened to mention that to Padmè. She went with you when she could and when she wasn’t able to the other Detectives at the department volunteered.
“Wait? How big does that thing get?!” Detective Farns asked. Farns was 6 foot, 5 inches and 230lbs.
“It dilates from 2-3 centimeters and needs to be at least 7-10 centimeters.” Your Lamaze instructor repeated.
“......how?!” The Detective asked, confused and a little scared.
But when Kix was back, he hounded your OBGYN with questions and they both ended up talking in medical jargon you didn’t understand. Your physician knew he wanted to deliver the baby, so he treated your husband like he would a student. Kix even attended other births so he could study the techniques and assist to be better prepared. When the time came to deliver Jesse, Kix did the work while your OBGYN patiently observed and instructed. You could see then why so many in the 501st needed him, when he got into his professional mindset, he was so calm. His voice was soothing and his tone oozed control and confidence.
He delivered Kaia all on his own, your OBGYN simply there as an observer. Kix made the calls, instructed the nurses, told you when to push, and when to relax. You were nervous about not having Kix right next to your face, like with your first child. But it turned out hearing his voice and feeling the occasional hand he placed on your calf or knee was perfect, as you spent much of this labor with your eyes squeezed shut and screaming.
“They said your second kid just pops right out!! Why isn’t it out?!?!”
“You’re doing fine sweetie, this one is just more stubborn.” Kix calmly explained.
“Feel free to give Fives’ hand a squeeze.” He added. You screamed in reply as you pushed, squeezing Fives’ hand as your husband suggested. Kix smirked when he glanced at Fives’ pained face, trying desperately not to show that pain.
After it was done, Kix slept while you nursed and Anakin and Padmè cooed over the baby. Jesse was spending time with his namesake and Uncle Jesse getting lunch. Jesse had mentioned to his nephew that he had seen things in that room. Traumatizing things.
“Gross haha!” His nephew replied.
“Ya know, I was there when Padmè gave birth, and it went faster than I had expected. I blinked and there they were!” Anakin noted.
“That’s because you fainted Ani.” Padmè gently reminded him.
“No I didn’t.” Anakin was in denial.
“You did. Rex had to come in and get you, but it was difficult because he was determined to keep his eyes closed.” Kix sleepily muttered from his spot on the sofa, his back to them.
Rex was sitting in a chair next to his brother.
“Don’t feel bad General. I fainted when my son was born. I’m hoping I don’t do that when my next kid arrives. I have 4 months left to prepare!” Rex said hopefully. You smiled, remembering how he had glanced down passed the blue sheet over his wife’s knees and then just hit the floor.
“I don’t know why you two fainted, seeing that kinda stuff is cool.” Kix’s muttered voice sounded a bit more awake.
“There’s just...a lot going on down there...” Anakin explained, Rex nodding in agreement. Each had a thousand yard stare.
The memory faded, you circled your arm around your husband’s waist and kissed the back of his shoulder. He turned his head a bit to look at you, you kissed his jaw.
“You want me to wake her? Just so you can move your arm?” You whispered, unsure how comfortable Kix’s arm was when it was being clutched tightly. He shook his head,
“Nah, she’s fine. She won’t be this snuggly for much longer.” He lamented. He loved his kids so much. You had realized that when they slept with you, he didn’t have nightmares. He would have them occasionally with you, sometimes you could comfort him and sometimes you couldn’t. You didn’t take that personally either. He’d been through things you couldn’t begin to imagine. But when either of the kids (or both sometimes) squeezed into bed with you, he slept through the night peacefully every time.
“I know, she loves her daddy.” You agreed, snuggling your face up to his back. You kept your arm on his waist.
“What are we going to do when neither kid wants to cuddle with us?” You asked him.
“We’ll just have another.” Came his casual whispered reply. He could feel you smile against his back.
“Deal.”
Tag list
@simping-for-fives
@jgvfhl
@carlycrays
@nelba
@showmetheclones
@leias-left-hair-bun
@xalvy-zen
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wlw-lovestruck-fiction · 4 years ago
Note
Onyx tells Mc she’s pregnant. They hosts a party for everyone to announce of Onyx’s pregnancy. How they announce it and how everyone react are up to you!
Written by @evoedbd
WARNINGS Mentions of abuse Mentions of miscarriage Potentially offensive attempts at humor
Chanouncement
Cali was good with weird. Completely fine. The last year had seen her life absolutely flipped on its head. Perhaps rolled over by a truck, chopped up, tossed into a woodchipper, fed to gulls, shat out across the country… the picture was quite morbid.
Cali had foolishly thought her life couldn’t get any weirder. After all, she was dating the nicer of two near identical twins, who both so happened to be supernaturally selected demon slayers. The “evil” twin had turned Cali into a well of Supernatural energy and used said power to give the demons a massive level up. That wasn’t all, she’d also watched said twin, whilst possessed, gut Onyx, the love of her life and watched Onyx emerge a dragon. If that wasn’t unusual and morbid enough, Cali had literally shouted her romantic love at a literal dragon, who had once been her five-foot nothing girlfriend. Cali had been dating a literal dragon. In love with a literal dragon. That should have topped the weirdness charts. But no, Cali had then become the next Envy herself, and thus the only human bridge between a mod girl reincarnated into a brown bear, and her dead girlfriend. If that wasn’t enough, she’d been part of a ritual to bring her girlfriend back into human form, and to top it off, Cali discovered that her blood was the literal key to her girlfriend’s soul and destroying it. Nothing too serious. Just casual lesbian disaster stuff. Only, neither she nor Onyx were actually lesbians. Both of them appreciated men. In the sexy way. In the “Onyx had dated a man who abused her until her twin sister had gutted him like a pig and stolen his supernatural powers”, way. That kind of bisexual… no wonder some people were a little intimidated by the Queer community. Between U-Haul lesbians not checking for demon possession and world ending bisexuals, that was all pretty scary.
Though not as scary as what she and her lady love planned to do. As fate would have it, if fate was a wonderful arsehole conscious, Cali had been delivered a further dose of weirdness in her unusual life. Weirdness in the form of her formerly dragon, formerly dead girlfriend discovering she was pregnant under the potent influence of ritualistic magic, which had restored her human form. Given that these circumstances would have been terrifying for anybody, even without the added fact that she was now vulnerable for a demon demi-devil’s possession and the prime target of an apocalyptic plot, it made absolute sense that Onyx was anxious. Cali had been there, she understood how end of the world pressure like that could mess with a girl, which was why it was imperative to bring the team up to date on the latest development… and no, that was not a kidney, not yet. Onyx wasn’t that far along.
So far, the plan of a joyful distraction had gone off without a hitch. The common area was alive with laughter flowing from the Sin Troupe. Alcohol flowed relatively freely, along with several bowls and bags of typical party food such as potato chips and popcorn. The floor was already littered with crumbs, mostly from the boys throwing scraps at Wrath between rounds of charades. One thing Cali had learned tonight was that for a group that entertained for a living, a group also responsible for concealing the fact the world was woefully fucked from the general population, they were horrific actors. Now the money and tickets made sense, for even the most deluded of fans would surely notice the cracks if it was left to their acting skills alone.
“Shaving! Um, WHIPPED! Oh! BDSM KINK SHAMING!”
“Moron.”
“Darius… how did you even get that from dancing?”
“Oh? That’s what it is? I thought Wrath was possessed.”
“She’s Britney Spears. Cal’s her circus boy.”
“Well we aren’t all DJs here, Malakai. How was I supposed to get that from whatever she and Cal were doing?”
Cali didn’t tune into the words after that. She was back to anxious, or perhaps the woman tucked under her arm was. It was difficult to tell with the bond so active, causing the teeth marks on her shoulder to burn with the heat of a dragon’s love. Try as she might, she was caught between two violent sensations. The magic of the mark; memories of heat as playful nips had become a serious bite, a possessive one from a Dragon unlike the world had ever seen, or ever would. It wasn’t like anybody had seen Onyx as a dragon… except two sold out nights of the Sin Circus, a carnival ground and a shopping mall full of super excited fans and everyone online. Ok, that was a lot of people who’d seen Onyx as a dragon. That could be a problem. Which led to the anxiety. The type which made sweat prickle in all the uncomfortable places and her stomach do terrified flips. She wasn’t even the pregnant one. Onyx had to survive a pregnancy, targeting and contain a literal dragon’s soul.
All Cali had to do was make the statement that she had an announcement to make like a normal human being. She had to ignore the sweat trickling down her palms, tickling every crease, and how her heart skipped several beats in the past minute; rushing faster and faster until she could hear in her ears when she closed her eyes. Slower Blinks. She had to be normal.  Be normal. Be normal. Be normal.
All she had to do was make a single little announcement, that was admittedly life changing. It wasn’t like these people would judge. After all they were supernatural Demon assassins chosen by mystical powers based on the Seven Deadly Sins. If there was any group which were not judgemental it would surely be these people.
“I have channouncement to make.” she said with a rather high-pitched voice and a casual smile just a little too tight to be completely relaxed. In a room full of assassins she might as well have been waving a red flag saying terrified med school dropout alert. This was the time for the royal skill of fake it till you make it mixed with an impossibly large dose of denial. Anxious? Cali? Hah! No way. She had nailed it.
“What she means is we want to tell you something. Since we’re already playing charades, we want to try and see if you can guess.” Onyx chimed in, snuggling playfully under Cali’s arm. The mechanic grinned, letting her goofy affection conceal another wave of nerves. It was easier if she just stared at Onyx and let her face do what it would do. Give in to the muscles making her smile as she got lost in the most dazzling green eyes the world had ever seen. The dusting of blue eyeshadow really made those eyes pop, like emeralds offered to thieves on booby trapped pedestals. Hah, boobs! Cali liked those. Especially Onyx’s. No matter how Cali tried to avoid falling for the emerald trap, she found her gaze lingering, feasting on how the light shone across dark lashes and the rhinestone piercing just beneath Onyx’s right eye. It kept focus away from tender pink lips, from subtle little bites that portrayed a mix of excitement and nerves. Cali doubted the others would realise Onyx was anything other than playful. Afterall Onyx was a master of faking it until she made it, even to her closest friends. It showed in how loose her body was, how genuine her show stopping smile seemed. If Cali hadn’t felt the flickering within the bond, she may have bought Onyx’s act. That and the affection. How Onyx’s arm around her waist pulled that little bit too tight to be casual. Or how trimmed nails tried to dig into the grey fabric of Cali’s shirt; dragon talons clinging to the finest treasure. A scared girl seeking reassurance.
“Right. And to make it a team Envy experience, I’m going to tell Rip how to act.” Cali explained out loud, barely restraining her laughter as Ripley’s eagerness flooded her mind.
“Alright! I’m the best at charades! My acting is on point. Everyone thinks I’m a bear.”
Cali didn’t have the heart to tell Ripley that her “bear” act was entirely too adorable to be terrifying. Ripley may have the body of a bear, her soul, however, was still that of a tender human. Her soft eyes would strike terror into the hearts of the masses, along with her awkward attempts at snarls and finely groomed coat. Every gesture of her paws would see her painted pink claws drip sparkles, which admittedly might be horrifying to cishet folk. Ripley as always, was dressed for battle, wearing a fearsome checkered neck scarf, complete with an adorable little bow…truly, Ripley could intimidate the world into movies and cuddles. She could terrify little girls into dropping popcorn into her open maw as she scrolled an iPad and lamented the fashion she could no longer wear. She was oh so very, very terrifying. Cali had fallen for the bear terror for five seconds when they’d met, that was true. Then again, Cali had also believed Vinca a completely evil maniac who killed Onyx’s boyfriend, who was a loving and uplifting man, just to steal his powers and fuck with Onyx. She had assumed Dorran had loved and cherished Onyx until his dying breath. Cali had assumed Dorran had trained her, protected her, instead of abused her and hurled her at demons. Cali’s track record with assumptions was pretty horrific, actually. Horrifically awful.
She realised her lingering rage must have echoed through the bond when a soft touch to her forearm drew her attention. Once again, she was drawn into the trap of green, found herself beneath the crashing wave of Onyx’s gaze. This gaze, however, was different. It was sympathy and confusion, a jumbled mess of understanding which stood secondary to the fact Onyx wished to soothe. A small flick at the corner of Cali’s mouth let Onyx know the gesture was received, the storm had passed, at least for now. She didn’t need to keep her gaze on Onyx to know that the former Envy Assassin’s expression mirrored her own. Cheeky grins and eyes twinkling with mischief as Cali allowed her mind to sink into the images and emotions she needed to convey, needed Ripley to convey. Onyx was their awareness, her approval expressed in delighted cackles and birdsong laughter, by her touch on Cali’s arm shifting with her small body.
The bear started out stiff, walking in shorter, wider strides on hind legs as forelegs awkwardly extended before her in a zombie like attempt of curves. A few strides in, Ripley fell forwards, catching her weight on her forepaws, before attempting her waddling all over again. This time, poor Ripley tried to bring them to her back, only to manage to reach her hips; range of motion not allowing her any further. The awkward waddling, paws on hips appeared like something off a runway full of models who had indulged in too many illegal substances. The display had everyone howling with glee, even Ripley within the Envy Trio’s heads. Eventually, Ripley ceased the arms, instead waddling awkwardly around as crew shouted out their guesses.
“Zombies!”
“Onyx got a Runway offer!”
”Did you buy a petting zoo?”
Both Cali and Onyx laughed, shaking their heads to every shout. Ripley let forth a beastly groan as she lowered herself to the ground, then rolled onto her back. After some awkward shuffling, the bear eventually lifted her feet straight into the air, spread apart as far as her beastly hips would allow. The pose was awkward enough for a human, let alone a bear, with her little tail all fluffed up and her long arms gesturing in awkwardly small arcs across her rather fuzzy stomach.
“Onyx is getting a feature in a music video!”
“She’s designing for a dance studio!”
“Onyx has put on weight!”
“We’re meant to guess an announcement, moron, not state an obvious.”
“Cal, manners.”
“It’s true, she is a bit bulkier since she became human again.”
“You know, it’d be easier if you just told me what I was acting, instead of having me rolling around like a pregnant whale.” Ripley sighed through the bond, rising halfway before freezing. She seemed shocked beyond comprehension. Had she been human, Cali was sure Ripley’s face would have lost its hue. The Envy trio stared at each other. Onyx’s face had gone ashen with fright, concern filtering through her tight smile. Her apprehension flooded the bond, all her concerns jumbled together in a tide which threatened to wash both Ripley and Cali away. Fear that she might lose the approval of her sister figure. That she might garner disapproval or be judged for something beyond her control. That everyone would hate her. That she’d be alone again.
“Onyx is…?” Ripley’s question never came through completely.
The moment Cali realised what was happening, her mind was there. She stormed Onyx’s consciousness, shield raised to deflect every horrific thought and fear before she lashed out. Snapshots of fantasy, impossibilities given life for a few seconds. A scent more appealing and delicate than anything else the world could offer. Soft baby blonde hairs that appeared almost white against more tanned skin. Emerald green eyes glistening with nothing but utter adoration. The rush of family, how the feeling of their support could provide wings. Onyx, belly rounded, cheeks flushed and eyes twinkling with delight, toes kicking through a gentle stream. A loving smile from Vinca, the sharpness abandoned as she cooed over an innocent child. How tiny a child would be in Wrath’s large arms, yet how tender the brawler would be. Malakai’s warm smile as the baby traced his tattoos. Darius, dangling his chain just out of their reach as the babe giggled. Cal, strumming his guitar as the three men sung to the babe, who slumbered in an older Avi’s arms.
“Oh my god! Onyx is-” Again, Ripley never finished the though. Her eyes rolled backwards, almost as if she were being possessed in a hammer horror film. Her legs gave out, her body crumpled to the ground. Cali found herself swaying, her vision filled with black dots as the intensity of their emotions washed over the trio, sweeping them away in the tsunami. She clung to Onyx, fighting to keep the smallest Envy assassin on her feet. Onyx seemed to feel the same way, given how she clung tighter to Cali, preventing the Chinese woman from falling. A loud crash let Cali know that Ripley had indeed gone through the bowls of supplied snacks, along with the table they rested on. Chips flew everywhere, spraying across the penthouse along with shards of broken bowls. The laughter stopped, everyone half rising, half looking towards Cali.
“… That wasn’t part of the announcement.” Was the only thing Cali could offer to the expectant assassins. The room went eerily silent, enough that one might hear crickets chirping, or the din from the streets of Vegas echoing to the top floor of the hotel.
“She’s having a baby!” An entirely too cheerful voice broke the deafening silence, drawing everyone’s attention to Cal’s little boy. Avi stood in the doorway to the common area, his little yellow hood pulled up over sleep tussled black locks. His deep brown eyes shone like melted chocolate, filled with a tired child’s innocent delight and excitement. Cali couldn’t help but smile at the boy, giving him the smallest nod of approval, which only made him smile so delightedly that his white teeth stood starkly against his dark skin.
“How does that tie into O- oh…” Malakai started out confused, only for realisation to flood his rich eyes. His mouth fell open, brows arching towards his hairline as his gaze travelled between Avi, Cali then to Onyx. Cali couldn’t read him, couldn’t tell what that meant. Oh? That was ALL he had to say? Just oh? Oh, that was, OH, so very helpful.
“Oh?” Wrath began, her own eyes following the same path Malakai’s had.
“Ohhhhh…” She drew out, seeming to have reached the same conclusion he had. Cali felt herself bunch up, muscles rippling beneath her skin as if they were infected vines. Did they not realise what they were doing? Could they not see how Onyx shrunk away from them? Could they not tell how close to tears she was? It flooded Cali’s body, overwhelming her with its chill. As if winter had fallen for a thousand years across all her nerves until only an aching numbness lingered. The subtle tensions through her screamed her protective intentions as she angled herself defensively between the troupe and Onyx, shielding the anxious woman from such evident attention. If the troupe were going to hurt her, then they had better be prepared to face the wrath of Two Envy Assassins… or at least a sassy bike mechanic.
“Oh.” Wrath concluded. It was simple but telling, accompanied by the pinch of her brows. Confusion and consideration warred within her eyes, yet her face remained remarkably blank. It was enough to have Onyx’s breath escape shakily as she clung to Cali’s arm, squeezing until she was sure her nails would be biting through the colourful cloth of her hoodie. If Cali felt pain, it didn’t show, she simply stood silent. A guardian. A woman ready to fight tooth and nail to protect what she loved. The magic within her mark burned immensely hot, scorching Cali’s skin as its darkness flared, much like a panther swishing its tail in agitation. Despite everything, Onyx couldn’t help but lean closer, pressing her forehead into the mark she had left so long ago.
“Yeah. Big Oh.” Cal agreed, his own eyes shifting between everyone, calculating in his sharp, judgemental manner.
“A bad oh?” Cali challenged, unable to endure the strain of not knowing for a second longer. The calculating glances, the wide-eyed silence, everything screaming silent judgements. Cali couldn’t stand it, and if she couldn’t then she knew Onyx would be drowning. The blonde seemed to cower, tucking her head into Cali’s collar as the Asian woman unleashed her inner dragon upon every Assassin with a pointed glare. Cali’s arms encased Onyx, a fortress of flesh and bone protecting the scared princess. Despite her height, Cali found herself playing prince and dragon, both warring to keep the princess safe in their ways. It would be so easy to protect with nothing but love, to embody the princely hero and do no evil. Let the Princess make her own mistakes and swoop in to clean up the mess. However, Cali had always been more of a dragon. Someone to shield those she loved from harm with all her might, to try to prevent them ever leaving to make the mistake in the first place.
A universal flinch rolled through the Assassins, ricocheted like a bullet from Cal’s gun once they realised just how they had come across to the smallest yet brightest of their number.
“Girl, you’re gonna be a baby momma? I get to be an uncle?” It was Darius who brought the excitement. His seductive eyes shone with barely restrained glee; glee which bubbled through to his most dashing smile. His whole body appeared to vibrate, as if he was giving everything in order restrain himself. His glee was infectious, seeping into Cali’s muscles with a gentle warmth until they thawed. She allowed herself to relax a little, giving Onyx an opening to lift her head and give a shy nod. At that nod, sparks flew, igniting the warmth within every assassin. Darius practically flew forwards, wrapping his arms around Onyx and Cali in his excitement. Malakai was right behind him, scooping the three huggers into his humongous arms and giving a gentle squeeze. Finally, Onyx laughed with relief so potent it was as if the air itself heaved a sigh.
“I’m so happy for you.” Malakai whispered, lowering his head into the pack so that he could press an adoring kiss to Onyx’s cheek. Darius seemed determined to copy the gesture, planting his own lips to Onyx’s forehead in a few lazy pecks. Onyx giggled, squeezing whomever she could grasp. Cali didn’t kiss, not this time, she simply rested her forehead to Onyx’s temple, offering her own silent support.
“Congratulations, Onyx.” Wrath’s gentle voice was flooded with warmth, with unconditional love as she wrapped her own arms around the group, holding her team as if they may shatter under the intensity of her love. That thought was enough to make Cali smile. Wrath loved as she lived, hard and intense. When one had Wrath’s affection, they had the weight of her heart on their sleeve, the promise of an Arch Angel named for a sin. The warmth of Wrath’s hug was potent beyond the physical, it seeped into the soul. Wrath warmed from the inside out with her embrace, turning everyone mushy and relaxed. None relaxed further than Onyx, who trusted her weight to the men and women wrapped around her. Cali was perhaps the only one who denied herself the safety, instead raising her challenging glare to Caleb North. The only Assassin yet to give a reaction.
“Avi, cover your ears.” He finally began, letting forth a soft hiss of breath between his teeth. Long, callused fingers brushed through his supermodel locks, pushing them away from his glistening forehead as he waited for his ward to obey. Avi, innocently as ever, clamped his little hands over his twee ears. Only when Cal was sure that Avi was blocking his ears did the Sloth Assassin begin.
“I don’t understand how you’re all taking this so well. Especially you, Cali. Even a med dropout should -”
“I didn’t cheat!” Onyx’s outraged cry was enough to have everyone flinching. Onyx was a pool of wrath, sickly tar bubbling to a boil in a cauldron precariously positioned above the archway of a door. Or above the gates soldiers of shame might siege. Cali turned her focus back to Onyx, watching how her nostrils flared, reminiscent of her dragon form. Cali fancied she saw a haunted gleam in Onyx’s blazing green eyes, which had narrowed in utter fury, causing her piercing to gleam like a blade in the light. Gone was the whimpering, terrified maiden within that accusation. Onyx had already been that for two people. Now, Onyx stood confident, challenging the world instead of shying from an abuser. As terrified as she had been of her family’s reaction, Onyx was done running.
“I didn’t even think that!” Cal fired back, as if offended on Onyx’s behalf that such a thing were even considered. It was then Cali could see it. The concern waging war with cautious joy in his deep blue eyes. It was noticing that which kept Cali from lunging into the fray, instead giving Cal a chance to redeem himself in their eyes. Or dig his own grave.
“But pregnancy is stressful enough without adding demons, and the fact that you turned into a dragon! Ask yourself, with everything going on, is this really the time to start playing happy family? Is it safe? You see what I go through with Avi. What if you die, or die again in Onyx’s case? I’m worried about you. A child is a serious responsibility, not something to dabble with in the honeymoon phase of your re-“
“Honeymoon phase? That’s what you’re calling -” Cali fired up, her own dark eyes igniting with rage. Cal had dug his grave with construction grade machinery. She could feel the mark burning, instinctively knew it was the angriest it had ever been, as if rebelling along with the rest of her body. Her vision blurred, weakened legs causing her to half stumble. She could barely hold herself up, yet she wanted nothing more than to lunge at the Sloth assassin. Honeymoon phase? Is that what he thought? There was nothing honeymoon about dying! Nothing honeymoon about offering your soul to a lineage of power just to let the one you love have a single coherent thought!
“Enough.” Wrath didn’t raise her voice. She didn’t need to. The note of finality in her tone was more than enough to bring Cali’s instinctive outrage grinding to a halt long enough for her to take a soothing breath and blink away the haze from her vision. She felt Onyx do the same, even as Malakai, Darius and Wrath untangled from the cuddle huddle and respectfully gave the Envy assassins their breathing room.
“I think Cal is just as confused as we are as to how this happened.”
“The gay club doesn’t know?” Darius’ gasped interruption drew the eyes of the entire room, much like metal shavings to a magnet. Despite his crude wording, his shock that nobody else knew was evident, painted across his dashing face as if it were a canvas hanging in the Louvre.
“Darius. I’m not gay.” Onyx’s correction was gentle, delivered with an amused tilt to her lips.
“Errrmmmm, I’m bi.” Cali lifted a hand timidly, akin to how a child might raise it when unsure of the answer in class.
“I wasn’t invited to any club.” Malakai’s comment was delivered quietly, his brows arched in a mocking display of confusion. Wrath, dutiful as ever, simply crossed her large arms, muscles flexing deliciously with every subtle movement. Her head fell forwards, face meeting her awaiting palm as she bluntly informed everyone.
“There is no club.”
“Code then? So the Bi-bies are having a baby and broke the queer code? Like, aren’t don’t you queers have some form of secret club? How did the Lesbian not know? Aren’t you all meant to be experts on lady parts? Malakai might get a pass as a pan man. Queer people always seem to know everyone’s-”
“Darius.” Malakai began, stepping forwards. The sound of chips crunching beneath his boots was enough to draw a tiny snicker from Cali, though her amusement was quickly smothered by the exhausted frown on Wrath’s face. Her usually blazing eyes held poignant gleam. Something so deeply cut, as if her heart had once more been shattered. The mechanic didn’t even realise where Wrath’s mind had gone, not until she felt Onyx also tense beside her. Oh… that was too telling. The last time Wrath’s sexuality had come into the group, half the group had died. Her family had been torn apart as she helplessly cradled a broken heart heavy in a hollowed out chest. Darius had just toed a landmine; one he didn’t even realise he was prone to step on. Even Cal held his tongue, watching his leader with a softened expression that was all the more lancing. A joust of agony straight to Cali’s chest, or perhaps it was Onyx’s chest. At this point, it didn’t matter, both hearts beat to the same music, each complimentary and connected by the existence of music.
“Stop digging yourself into that hole, man, its deep enough.” Malakai concluded. Darius looked puzzled for a moment as he looked around the room before sudden realisation dawned in his eyes. Never had Cali seen him shuffle as awkwardly as he did then, steadfastly avoiding Wrath’s gaze.
“Right… but yeah, wow, congratulations baby girl, or baby momma now.”
“Thanks.” Onyx muttered, offering a small yet undoubtedly genuine flick of a smile.
“Cali, I gotta say, I did not peg you for… you know?” Darius powered on, earning several confused looks from the group. Genuine awe shone in his eyes, mixed with an overly heaped spoonful of respect. The concoction of emotions was potent, yet it only left Cali blinking in confusion.
“I do?” She drew the sounds out, shuffling awkwardly until she untangled herself from Onyx. With a flick of her chin, she attempted to clear a sweat slicked bang from her face, only to have it catch across her lashes. Her eyes watered, stinging with the saltiness of sweat, punishing her perhaps for not seeing what was going on. Where was Darius going with this?
“Like, wow. I guess we should have known you were packing from all the noise you two make, but I did not even notice.”
“Darius!” Onyx gasped, her tone scolding and scandalised even as the most awkward giggle imaginable bubbled in her throat. The beautiful slopes of her cheeks flushed brilliantly, showing through the layers of makeup in splotchy pinks. Only Cali knew that underneath, Onyx would be brighter than a tomato; her blush the embodiment of coals when left bare to the world.
“Noise? Packing?” Cali inquired, continuing to wipe at her offended eye as she tried to puzzle what Darius was saying.
“Like, your tuck job is insane! And it hardly looks like you’re wearing makeup at all! And your boobs, like, they look real, man.” He powered on like a trooper, gesturing to her chest area.
“Um… they are?” Cali’s questioning tone became even more befuddled. Why was he commenting on her chest? How did that tie into Onyx’s pregnancy? It was not like Cali was going to be providing breastmilk, so what else was she missing?
“Oh! I didn’t realise you were on treatments. That totally makes sense-”
“Hold on… do you think I’m-” Cali tried to interrupt. Treatments. Packing. Tuck job. Breast surgery. All of this pointed towards one thing.
“I’ve seen some bad tuck jobs in my day, I mean like, slipping from under the dress levels. Your tuck-”
“I DON’T HAVE A DICK DARIUS!” Cali shouted, sending the entire room into silence. Instantly, her hands flew to her mouth, covering it in utter shock at her own outburst. Embarrassed didn’t begin to cover it, she was utterly mortified. Both for her outburst and that her sex was even in question. Then, guilt washed over her. Guilt that she was embarrassed over an assumption, that she was even edging on potentially phobic behaviour. She had been born female; born the way she was meant to be as a person. That she was embarrassed as being mistaken for trans felt as if she was insulting the trans community somehow. That thought alone made her feel sick.
“…Oh.”
“We really needed to hear that. I don’t think downstairs heard you.” Cal’s particular brand of snark earned a soft snort from several people, which only made Cali’s cheeks burn hotter. Despite this, she uncovered her face, taking a deep breath before speaking.
“I’m not trans. Also, that is so rude! If someone is trans you don’t just casually tell them you’ve made them! That’s so hurtful! Come on, man.”
“Not cool, Darius. Not cool.” Malakai added. The other assassins nodded, murmuring their agreement.
“Then how are you two so loud? We’ve had to invest in earplugs, and your noise has chased off four girls this week!” Darius’ lament was met by a loud scoff from Cali.
“Seriously? That’s what you meant by noise, Darius? You’re Lust, literally, and can’t think how to get loud without a …?” She trailed off, making several awkward gestures with her hand. Her fingers curled, forming a loose cupping shape as flicked her wrist back and forth, hand around the height of her stomach. Her gesture didn’t last long before Onyx’s shoulder playfully bumped into hers, earning a playful tap in return as the women swayed into one another.
“There have been noise complaints… and a cleaning bill for the elevator. Also, a note to visit lost and found. Something about clothing?” Wrath dutifully informed, fighting off the dusting of pink across her cheeks as valiantly as she could. Several pairs of eyes fixed upon Onyx, who suddenly seemed to shrink into Cali’s side. The Chinese woman felt Onyx’s body heat up, enough that she was convinced steam should have been hissing from Onyx’s ears like smoke from a coal train. In the heat of the moment, neither Cali nor Onyx had stopped to think about anything save each other. Clothes had been abandoned across Vegas, and the elevator… the memory of trees flooded the bond. Onyx climbing Cali like one. The dirt filled roots of the tree Onyx had gifted Cali when she was a dragon. Innocence and seductive depravity bubbled within the bond, only increasing the heat in both their faces.
“Can I be dead again?” Onyx squeaked, covering her face with Cali’s hoodie. The idea of Onyx dying again was agonising, enough that a sharp retort bubbled on the tip of Cali’s tongue. She swallowed it, pushing her tongue down into the cavity of her jaw to resist crying out. If she was in the position of being told to retrieve her clothing from lost and found, Cali probably would have felt the same way.
“Hold on. I thought we were discussing how Onyx got knocked up.” Darius cut in. Instantly, Cali was conflicted. His bluntness was a smack on the snout, though it did save them from a far more awkward conversation.
“Darius…” Cal’s hissed warning was enough to send a chill through the room.
“Which we are all crazy happy for, baby girl, but it is a big change.” The Lust assassin continued, earning a loud snort from Onyx.
“Yeah. Tell me about it.”
“She didn’t cheat, and we didn’t exactly plan for it. Nahara told us there could be a cost for restoring Onyx to her human form. The possibilities included a physical manifestation of the bond between the barer of the mark and Envy.” Cali explained. She stepped up a little, moving to wrap her arm securely around Onyx’s shoulders. Such lithe shoulders, despite their muscle, that bore the weight of the world. Such smooth skin beneath her fingertips as she massaged the curve of Onyx’s far shoulder, trying to ease even a fraction of her burden. Cali’s fingers traced odd patterns, even tickling down the divots of Onyx’s muscled biceps.
“Which arguably could be you. You’re both now, Cali.” Malakai commented, tone thoughtful. His dark eyes narrowed, as if he could read the answer from the bare air if only he focused hard enough. A large hand came to his strong chin, scratching at it thoughtfully.
“That’s what I thought too, but…” Cali trailed off, turning her gaze to Onyx. This was too close to Onyx’s demons, to the secrets she still kept. Cali desperately wanted to speak, yet she found herself tongue tied. Lost in the pain she saw in bright green eyes. Lost in her own loyalty. Could she even physically make herself betray Onyx in this way? Was it a betrayal to reveal the rest of what had been said? Internally, she pleaded, letting her emotions touch the bond between the Assassins. She needed Ripley to validate her, needed Onyx’s consent and understanding. She was falling, plummeting off a cliff with no wings to fly and no claws to cling to the stone she might be able to reach.
“She also mentioned something from the past could return to my future… well, our future.”
The moment the words left Onyx’s mouth, a soft grunt from the table drew Onyx’s attention. Ripley had managed to work herself into a sitting position, something which Cali found rather comical. The bears legs were spread apart, much like an awkward toddler, whilst her back was ramrod straight, akin to a woman forced into an impossibly tight corset. Ripley didn’t flood the bond with her words, she simply watched and listened, apparently trying to understand the responses from Wrath and Cal.
“From the past? When wer-“
“Dorran. Those weeks he increased your training.”
“WEEKS?” Cali exploded, viciously demanding an answer. Everything was red, hazy and hot, as if she’d been looking into the sun too long. Even behind her closed eyes, circles and swirls of color danced across her vision, hammering in time with her racing heart. This was worse than when she’d ridden her bikes to exhaustion or suffered sunstroke. Worse than the migraines that had occasionally followed. This was all of them at once, assaulting her body until only Onyx’s deceptively strong arm around her waist kept her standing. There was no question of whether or not she’d collapse, Onyx wouldn’t allow that, but the intensity burning through her was enough to make her remaining words slurred, gasped out between clenched teeth.
“He did that for weeks until h-” She never finished. Images assaulted her, striking her like books falling from a shelf above her head. An exhausted Onyx offering her best effort of a reassuring smile. She could take it. The deep barking voice. She’ll never learn if you don’t push her. How could she? Onyx wasn’t an assassin! She was barely on her feet. Its ok, Ripley, I can take it. Obedience… denied. She couldn’t. Not anymore. That harsh voice. Then I’ll do it myself. Go be useful. Hospital. Sirens. All my fault. All… Ripley. These were Ripley’s memories. It was sickening to realise this. Ripley had been part of it, she’d been right there and had trusted her leader. Trusted Dorran to protect Onyx. That sick man had used her connection to Onyx as a tool, had weakened Onyx with someone she loved unconditionally first… Cali’s tongue was bathed in bile, hot and thin, save for the chunks of chip swimming in the liquid. Dorran hadn’t even been man enough to do all the work himself. He’d manipulated Ripley too. With a soft snarl, Cali swallowed, refusing to let herself become any weaker than she felt in her directionless rage.
“Your abusive ex physically beat you into hospital? And caused a miscarriage? And nobody knew you were pregnant or that he was abusive? What the hell? Cal? Wrath? I though you two were assassins! How could you not realise what that piece of shit had done?” Gone was Darius’ amusement. His voice was raspy in his rage, scratching his usually chocolaty vocal cords. His eyes, which were usually dark, appeared almost black. Made of shadows and rage. He was half Wrath’s size, but the intensity of his demanding glare cowed even the brave leader, who was working her jaw in effort to find even a syllable of an answer. Tears dripped from the corners of her eyes, trailing openly down her cheeks as she allowed her gaze to fall to the toes of her bright red boots. Wrath, who was so strong, could barely stand under the weight of her guilt. Her shoulders shook, slouched in defeat. She may have been their leader. She may have been able to punch the devil out of every man, woman or child she met, but she couldn’t fight off the most horrific truth yet. She had nothing. No answer to give. No justification, even to herself.
“That’s why Vinca killed him, isn’t it? She knew about the pregnancy when that accident put you in hospital. Remind me to send her a gift basket.” Cal didn’t have an answer either, but he pushed on. His own eyes bore an unnatural sheen, one Cali quickly realised were tears. He was close to crying in his outrage. An assassin he may have been, but he was just as helpless now as when he had been possessed. Forced to watch the past rolled out in painful memories. For all the people he had saved, he was clearly struck by the potential he had failed. The possibility he had never even known about. Someone he would have loved with his whole heart, even if it was a lump of coal, and yet was powerless to protect.
“Does she know about the baby?” Wrath barely got the question out before Darius was there, snarling once again.
“Like hell.”
“With Nitsa inhabiting her? After she got my blood? We barely got Rip back, we can’t risk it. I’m not even sure if we should let Yvette know. I’m sorry, Onyx, but until Vinca is safe, I don’t want to risk either of you. I don’t want to control you, or keep you caged, but-” Cali’s imploring was cut off by Onyx’s finger across her lips, silencing her with the gentlest of touches.
“I know, you’re looking out for me. You’re not him.”
“Needless to say, Rip and I will be protecting Onyx, so we won’t be out with you. I also really don’t want Onyx combat training, or up on the highwire.”
“Cali…” Onyx playfully whined, fixing Cali with her best attempt at Puppy Dog eyes. Internally, Cali swore up a storm, using words she was sure even Darius would blush at. The bike mechanic forced herself to gaze into them, willed herself not to crumble at the adorable attempt. If Onyx was bad, how was her child going to be? The idea of baby Onyx alone had Cali cooing, turning into a pile of Oriental mush. If she hadn’t developed an immunity by the time they learned this trick… suddenly, she found herself incredibly hopeful that Onyx could be the strict parent, because Cali could already foresee ice cream for dinner. But to get there, she had to get over this current hurdle. The hurdle of Onyx’s adorableness amped up to a million and directed at her.
“Yeah, no. Sorry. Drop out Doctor’s orders. No being ten foot in the air while pregnant.”
“But the show-”
“Will be there when you’ve had your baby and are ready to return. Your health, and the baby’s health, come first, Onyx.” Wrath reminded; her tone gentle but leaving no room for negotiation. She offered a gentle smile, tears still glistening in her eyelashes. Her warmth was back, encompassing the room with a calming presence. It was enough for Cali to relax, to finally let go of everything and trust her team. These assassins were family. Onyx’s family. Her family. No matter what, she knew they would do their best to protect one another. That they’d die before allowing anybody to harm the baby. That they’d go to the depths of hell, following after Wrath’s angelic aura, to save each other. That’s just what this family did.
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homoose · 3 years ago
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Love Has a Learning Curve: epilogue (OC)
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Summary: An early morning, a doctor’s appointment, a new beginning.
Pairing: Spencer Reid x OC
Category: fluff
Warnings/Includes: pregnancy (including like… probably incorrect math and science but my degree was in English and this is fanfiction okay)
Word count: 2.7k
a/n: I’m actually so emotional don’t look at me thanks ♥️
Series Masterlist
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The sound of Spencer’s ringtone pierced through the early morning quiet, shrill and disconsolate. Maggie hummed against his chest, shifting as he clumsily reached across to the bedside table to answer it. 
“Hey,” he croaked, voice still smothered in sleep. “Mm... When?” He paused, and she could almost make out the answer on the other end. “Got it. Yeah.” 
He carefully set the phone back on the bedside table, and then his arms came around her shoulders. He let out a long sigh, the one she’d gotten quite used to over the last year and a half— the one that meant he had to go. She squeezed him around the middle and let out her own sigh. “Case?”
“Yeah.” He ran light fingers down her arm. “Jet’s taking off in ninety minutes.”
She glanced at the bedside table to the alarm clock that read 4:57am. They both knew he needed to leave within the next half hour if he was going to make it on time, but neither one made any effort to move. Instead, they breathed together in the pre-dawn stillness— a single moment of peace before the world and all its ugliness could crash through the fortress they’d constructed around their space and around each other.
“I don’t wanna go,” he whispered. 
“I know.” She pressed a kiss over his heart through his t-shirt. “I know.”
“I’m gonna miss everything,” he lamented. “Appointments, and milestones, and firsts, and I— I’m gonna miss all of it.”
She lifted her head at the tears in his voice. “Hey.” She shifted in the circle of his arms to prop herself up on his chest. “You’re not gonna miss all of it. You’ll miss this one appointment. And it’s— it’s not even an important one,” she assured, gentle fingers swiping away the lone tear that had managed to escape over his lash line. 
“Yes, it is.” He shook his head. “They're all important.”
She gave him a sympathetic smile, leaning forward to press a quick peck to his lips before sitting up and deciding to reassure him in the only way she knew how. “Okay, doctor. Eleven weeks. Tell me what we’re gonna find out today.” 
She pulled him up out of bed, interlacing their fingers and pressing their shoulders together. As she led him to the bathroom, he explained, “Dr. Layton will do the first ultrasound, and Baby will look more like a baby now. At around ten weeks they made the transition from embryo to fetus. They’ll be about two inches long.” 
She handed him his toothbrush and turned to grab his toiletry go-back from the linen closet, stifling a yawn. “Mmhm. What else?”
“Did you know they’re breathing now?” he asked, and she smiled at the way the excitement crept into his voice. “Between weeks ten and eleven, the fetus starts to inhale and exhale small amounts of amniotic fluid, which aids in the development of their lungs. It’s kind of like they’re breathing underwater.” 
“I didn’t know that,” she admitted, turning back to set the bag on the counter. “That’s pretty amazing. What about the heartbeat?”
He nodded vigorously as he applied toothpaste to the bristles of his brush. “We should be able to hear it, although sometimes it’s too early— depending on the accuracy of the estimated date of conception.”
He ran the water over the toothbrush before popping it into his mouth. She kissed his shoulder and then moved back into the bedroom, shuffling into their closet for his go bag. She checked it over on her way back to the bathroom, ensuring it had been fully repacked after the last case. She set it on the counter and placed his toiletry bag inside, leaving it open for him to pack his toothbrush and then sitting on the closed toilet lid. 
He rinsed his mouth and put his travel cap over the head of his toothbrush, gesturing with it and then dropping it into the bag. “They’ll do some routine lab work to test for things like gestational diabetes, and we can also choose to do additional screeners for chromosomal abnormalities and possible complications.” He looked at her then, and she saw the despondence creeping back in. “I should really be there, just— just in case.”
“Honey.” She stood and held out her hand to him, smiling a little when he accepted it with a squeeze. “It’s gonna be okay.” 
He let out a breath and pulled her into his arms, and they held each other in the silence, the soft light from the vanity washing over them. His phone buzzed with an incoming message, and she knew he needed to get on the road. Still, she held him for a second longer, and then they shuffled through the door and into the bedroom together. 
Maggie made her way back to bed, scooting down under the duvet to preserve the last remaining notes of his body warmth. She watched as he dressed silently, pulling on trousers, socks, a button up and cardigan. He skipped the tie in favor of coming to sit on the bed, bringing his hand to rest lightly over top of her belly over the covers. 
She covered his hand with her own and laced their fingers together. “Maybe you could ask Luke if you can FaceTime with his phone. You can probably take twenty minutes, right?”
He nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, I can do that.” He rubbed a tired hand over his face. “Maybe I should just upgrade my own phone.”
She huffed out a laugh. “Oh, I see how it is. Couldn’t upgrade for me, but once a baby comes along you’re ready for an iPhone.” 
“That’s not— you— you shouldn’t have to do all of this alone,” he huffed, and she realized her joke didn’t land when his voice cracked at the end. 
“Spence, I’m— I’m just teasing.” She lifted her hands to his face, pulling him closer and meeting his eyes. “I’m sorry; you’re upset, and that wasn’t nice.” 
She leaned up to kiss his forehead, letting her lips linger and breathing him in. “But I’m not alone. With you, I feel— the opposite of alone.”
“Irritated?” he offered. 
“No,” she laughed. “Supported, and cared for, and loved,” she corrected with a smile. “You’ve been all of that since day one. And I know that’s not going to change, whether you’re physically present in that doctor's office or not. Right?” 
When he nodded, she continued, “I love you. The most. And you are easily the best baby daddy on planet earth. Okay?”
The term of endearment dragged a smile from him, as it always did. “Okay.”
She leaned forward to press her lips to his, both sets upturned and a little dry from sleep. “Now, you need to go, or you’re gonna be late.”
“I know.” He kissed her again, long and slow, and then pulled back to lean their foreheads together. He hesitated for another ten seconds before standing to grab his bag from the bathroom. 
When he re-emerged, she reminded him, “Ask Luke about the FaceTime thing. I’m sure he won’t mind, and we can trust him to keep the secret. The appointment technically starts at 1:00, but I probably won’t be seen until at least 1:30.”
He crossed to give her another kiss. “I love you.” He crouched to press a kiss to her tummy. “And you.”
“We love you, too,” she smiled, fingers tangling in his curls. “And we’ll talk to you in a few hours.”
She kissed him one more time— couldn’t help herself. And then his warmth was gone from the bed, and the house was suddenly much too quiet. She snuggled back down under the duvet, her head on his pillow and the scent of his shampoo shrouding her senses and easing her mind.
Spencer really was supportive— endlessly so. Not overbearing, but interested and involved in every moment: reading all the newest research, bringing home her favorite treats, writing out a color-coded timeline of all the appointments and milestones. She wasn’t lying when she called him the best baby daddy. He was always there for her. So much so that the apprehension she’d had at the beginning of this surprise journey was nowhere to be found. 
As she drifted back into sleep, there he was again— she could almost hear the jangling of his keys in the bowl in the entryway, his feet on the stairs, the rustling of his pants and sweater being discarded onto the floor of their bedroom. 
And then she felt the warmth of his palm low over her tummy, coming to rest over the barely-there bump. She felt his lips on her shoulder and his chest pressed against her back. When she went to cover his hand with her own, her exhausted brain registered that it wasn’t a dream at all.
She turned her head, blinking her eyes open to see him smiling at her and drew her brows together. “What’s going on?”
He pressed another kiss to her shoulder, snuggling even closer and rubbing his thumb along her belly. “I’m, um— I told Emily I’m gonna consult from home on this one.”
“Okay, Mom, this’ll just be a little bit cold.”
Dr. Layton smoothed the gel over Maggie’s lower abdomen, and Spencer moved to thread their fingers together, shifting to stand even closer to the examination table. The ultrasound machine gave off a low hum as the doctor adjusted the wand over her tummy. She felt Spencer press a kiss to her temple and turned to smile brightly at him before turning back to the black and white screen. 
At her first appointment five weeks ago, she’d been by herself— alone and uncertain and terrified— and she’d declined the option of the ultrasound. It felt wrong to see the baby before Spencer even knew about them. Now, together with him, with her soon-to-be husband— she was more than ready to see their baby for the first time. And she could practically feel Spencer’s excitement next to her, his body nearly vibrating with it. 
“Ah, here they are. Hello, Baby Reid.” Dr. Layton pointed to a small, white figure on the screen. “Okay, right here, you can see their big ol’ head— perfectly normal size for this stage of development,” she assured, eyes deftly scanning the image in front of her. “Everything looks great! Now, I’m just trying to find…” 
She adjusted the wand over Maggie’s tummy, and suddenly a wub wub wub came over the tinny speaker of the machine. “There we are,” Dr. Layton smiled. “Very strong heartbeat.”
Spencer squeezed Maggie’s hand, and she felt the drop of a tear on her shoulder. She brought her other hand over to cover their tangled fingers, rubbing her thumb along the skin of his wrist and kissing his arm. 
Dr. Layton made a slightly perplexed humming sound, moving the wand again and losing the sound of the heartbeat, only to pick it up again— this time slightly faster. Maggie’s own heart stuttered a little as the doctor moved the wand again twice more and then cleared her throat. “Is something— is everything okay?”
She turned to Maggie with a kind smile. “Yes, yes,” she confirmed, and then she raised her eyebrows. “Just— do you hear the difference?” 
Spencer tilted his head in consideration, drawing his brows together and straining to hear. The doctor shifted the wand once more, allowing them to hear the two distinct patterns. 
Two distinct patterns, Maggie realized. 
Dr. Layton pressed the wand a little more firmly into her abdomen, moved it just slightly. “Those are two different heartbeats.” She pointed to the screen. “And those are two different babies. There’s a matching set of Baby Reids in there.”
Maggie couldn’t stop her jaw from dropping. “Is there—” She turned to Spencer incredulously. “Do twins run in your family?”
He shook his head silently, eyes wide. “Yours?”
“Nope,” she squeaked. 
“This obviously changes things slightly,” Dr. Layton explained, cleaning up the residual gel. “I’d like to see you every three weeks rather than every four. Then at twenty eight weeks, we’ll see how we feel, okay?” 
She smiled gently as Maggie and Spencer nodded dumbly. She removed her gloves and stood. “I’m going to give you two a few minutes. I’ll be back with your photos in a bit, and we can talk about any questions you might have.”
The door closed behind her, and the room was bathed in silence. Maggie sat up carefully and swung her legs over the side of the examination table. She looked down at her tiny, unassuming bump and felt a tear slip over her lashes. 
“Are you— are you okay?” Spencer whispered. 
She brought her gaze to his, found them teeming with barely restrained joy and yet the ever-present worry. “Well,” she started. “I, um— I always imagined two kids.” She brought her hands up to her sweaty cheeks and held her own face between her palms. “I guess this is— you know— just a quicker way to get there.”
Spencer immediately wrapped her in a hug, pressing kisses over her hair, her forehead, her shocked mouth. “Two babies. We’re having two babies.”
“Twins, Spence,” she breathed. “Twins.”
He replaced her hands with his own, cradling her face and kissing her sweetly, sighing all of his joy and adoration into her mouth. “I love you. So much. The most.” He lowered himself to press his lips to her belly. “All of you.”
She used gentle hands in his hair to tilt his face up, meeting his smile with a watery one of her own. “We love you, too, baby daddy.”
She could see the gears turning as he stood, his hands coming to rest on her hips. “About that.”
She raised her eyebrows. “Yes?”
“Do you, um— how difficult do you think it would be to get everyone together this weekend?”
She paused. “You wanna get married this weekend?”
“Yeah, that’s probably too soon, huh?” He huffed out a sigh, then his eyebrows shot up. “Oh— what about next weekend?”
“That’s just as soon!” she laughed. 
He furrowed his brow. “No, it’s not. There's a seven day difference.”
“You’re really in a rush, huh?” she teased. 
“Well. I just— I figure you should really be on my insurance anyway,” he reasoned. “Especially now that it’s— now that it’s twins.”
“Mm, yes, I’m sure that’s the reason,” she grinned.
He let out a long breath, and she watched his eyes journey over her face— memorizing every curve and angle, every new wrinkle, every last inch of her. And she knew the reason. 
“I know it’s just a piece of paper,” he murmured. “It doesn’t really change anything, but…” He used gentle fingers to brush her hair back from her face. “I just… really want to be your husband.”
She took her own minute to memorize the way he looked in this moment: her fiancé, the father of her children, the best man she’d ever known, the absolute love of her life. And she knew her own reason. 
“The paper might not change anything,” she agreed. “But— you’ve changed everything.”
He squeezed her hips. “In a good way I hope.”
“The best way.” She brought her hands to his face, rubbing her thumbs along his cheeks. “The best way.”
He closed the distance between them to kiss her with all the honey and magic and reverence he always did. He broke away to lean his forehead against hers with all the warmth and devotion and love he always did. She sighed, and it was all joy and vulnerability and contentment like it always was. And she knew their reasons. 
She kissed him again, and then murmured against his lips, “You know I’m still gonna refer to you as baby daddy, right?”
The laugh erupted from his chest and wrapped itself around her heart, tying tight and secure— a shield, and a haven, and a refuge— keeping her safe from every terrible thing. 
“I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
O no! Love is an ever-fixed mark 
That looks on tempests and is never shaken; 
It is the star to every wandering bark, 
Whose worth’s unknown, although his height be taken.
- William Shakespeare, Sonnet 116
———
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winged-reaper · 4 years ago
Text
Surprise at home
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art not mine
Pairings:  Tamaki Amajiki x female reader
Warning: Fluff cuz this boy deserves some love
Summary: Reader finds out a surprise to tell her husband Tamaki, but how will he take the news?
You and Tamaki had been married for just over a year and you couldn't have been happier. You ran a small school to give kids of villians and previous villians a second chance at life while he did Hero work. For some of the villains that just seemed to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, he would often give them the business card you had him keep just in case. As much as Tamaki worried about you, he knew you wanted to help these people out and he loved that about you. You always reached out to someone who needed help even when they didn't know how to ask for it. If not for that, then you two would have never started dating in the first place.
But all that aside anytime he came to visit you during one of his patrols that pasted by the school he always saw you interacting with the children happily. The smile you wore always set his heart a flutter but a thought came through his mind. It was a quiet one that occurred shortly after you first got married but he was too shy to mention it. He wanted to have a child with you. Tamaki knew you would be an excellent mother with your caring and loving nature but he was scared you would reject the idea entirely. Reject him. The very thought had him shaking so he tried to push the thought of asking you to carry his child as far in the back of his mind as possible.
One Saturday, you woke up a bit later than usual. You stretched up in yours and Tamaki's and sighed. "It just had to be my day off work that Tamaki had to leave extra early." You pout missing his snuggles. As shy as he was in public your husband could be quite the cuddle bug when it was just the two of you. You loved that about him, it was your own private side to him. But as you continued your complaining in your thoughts another complaint began to make itself feel known. You paused feeling your stomach turn and twist before a sensation in your throat had you rushing towards the toilet to puke up all of your dinner from the night before.
After puking, you leaned your head against the toilet and tried to think what you could have eaten that made you so sick. You were always so careful with your cooking since Tamaki's quirk relied on the foods he ate and you made sure the seafood was good whenever you bought some to him for lunch. When your love's name ran across your mind a second time, your eyes widened. You made a quick dash for the calendar you kept in the kitchen looking for the mark you put to remind yourself of when your time of the month was supposed to begin. As soon as you found the mark you hand went to your mouth in shock. It was 3 weeks late and you hadn't noticed because of how busy things at the school had been lately.
You hurried back to your bedroom and scoured your closet for the box of special presents you received at the wedding. One such box contain a couple pregnancy tests. "There's no way. There's no way." You repeat as you take both tests just in case the first one was buggy. Pacing back and forth you heard your phone buzz snapping you out of your mini panic. Looking at it you saw your husband send you an "I love you" message making your heart swell before sent a little octopus emoji making you giggle. "He's getting hungry." You say before realizing it was time to check the tests.
Covering your eyes you peeked at them cautiously before your jaw dropped. Both tests said positive. You cried for joy at seeing that. You had wanted to bring up starting a family with Tamaki for a while but it seemed every time you tried to bring up the topic there was an emergency that either of you had to take care of and it became very frustrating. So after a while you just gave up the idea and focused all your energy on the kids that came through your program, but apparently fate had other ideas. This was something wonderful, but would Tamaki feel the same?
You shook away those thoughts as you made your way to the kitchen. On your days off when Tamaki had to go in early, you always brought him lunch. He loved that and you loved getting to spend him lunch break with him, it made being married to the number 8 a little bit easier. Putting together his favorites you tried to think of something you could do to break the news to him. The main goal in mind, not freaking him out into the next century. But all your ideas felt short. You wanted to surprise him with the news but didn't know how. Eventually you sighed and decided you would figure it later.
After a brief walk, you entered the Fatgum Hero Agency. You knew the lady at the reception desk well as this was not your first visit and frequently just waved you on to the back. Smiling you left her a little treat today, you were in a really good mood and quickly hurried to the back to look for Tamaki. "Ah Y/N" said a familiar voice that made you stop and turn with a smile. "Hi Fatgum." You say walking up to the round hero. He laughed as he eyed the lunch you were carrying in your hand. "I see you brought Tamaki lunch again." Fatgum gave a little pout that quickly vanished. "I'm gonna have to find myself a cute wife like you to spoil me just like how you spoil little Tamaki." His comment made you blush making him chuckle before patting your head. "You know I only tease, but Suneater is still out on patrol with Red Riot. They should be back soon. That was good to hear.
You and Fatgum chatted back and forth in regards to the school and a few potential candidies for his Agency when they got a little older. All the while the hero noticed something a little different about you today. You seemed to have a new glow about you. It wasn't the usual glow you had, but something much more pure. Then an idea came across his mind and he had to ask. "Hey Y/N. Can I ask you something real quick?" You stopped whatever you were saying to give your friend a strange look before giving him a hesitant sure. "Are you pregnant?" Immediately your face turned bright red indicating that what he suspected was true. "Does Tamaki know yet?" You gave a sheepish shake of your head. "N-no I just found out this morning." You bashfully said.
"Found out what?" Said Kirishima making you practically jump three feet in the air. "Kiri leave Y/N alone." Tamaki warned the redhead before making his way into the room. Your heart raced with excitement at seeing your husband come to your rescue making you almost swoon for him all over again. Fatgum chuckled at your reaction. As soon as Tamaki took his goggles off his eyes were drawn to the lunch you brought and you could have sworn you saw him drooling for a second. He made his way over with a blush on his cheek. "Thank you love." He said before leaning down to give you the quickest of pecks on the cheek before he began to reach for his lunch.
Seeing the two of you interact gave Fatgum an idea. He snuck behind you and lifted the lunch you made from behind making both you and Tamaki blink at your hands that were now empty. "You can head home early today Suneater. It's been pretty quite today. Besides you and Y/N should get to have lunch together at home once in a while." He said before he began munching on the lunch you made. You gave a quick pout but quickly smiled when you realized that the hero did that so you could tell Tamaki in the comfort of your own home. Tamaki didn't seem to think too much into the reason why Fatgum was offering him the rest of the day off. It was strange but not too uncommon. He shrugged and looked back at you. "Let me go let Kirishima know and we'll head home." His stomach growled in response making him blush more and you giggle. "Well hurry home and I'll make you a big lunch." He gave a nervous smile as he turned to go track down the red headed hero returning to you a few minutes later. As you both walked out you peeked back at Fatgum, who was finishing the lunchbox and shooting you a good luck thumbs up. The gesture caused you to blush and make Tamaki look back at you. "Love? Are you ok?" He asked snapping your attention back to him. Giving a nod you quickly reassured him that you were perfectly okay. Better even. Hearing that made a gentle smile appear on his face, making you forget yourself for a moment as you leaned up to kiss him. Instantly the crimson tint appeared in his cheeks all the way to the tips of his ears. He was blushing almost all the way home.
Thankfully the walk wasn't too long but he wanted to hide knowing how red his face must have been from the simple kiss. "Tamaki why do you keep doing this to yourself?" His inner voice questioned. "Y/N is your wife, she deserves someone who doesn't turn to complete blushing mush every single time she kisses you. She-" Before his inner voice could continue it's tiny motivational lecture, your voice caught his attention. "Sweetie what do you want for lunch?" Tamaki blinked almost in shock that they were not only home but he had also changed into his civilian clothes. His thoughts were so loud that it drowned out everything around him. Shaking his head he told you what he wanted making you smile at him before you started cooking. Tamaki laid his arms over the table to partly hide this face as he watched you cook. He really loved you and was still amazed that a woman like you would want anything to do with him. But who was he to complain. As he thought about everything he loved about you, an old idea came creeping up from the cobwebs of his mind. You would look so beautiful with a baby bump. A baby bump he would be the cause of. The idea practically had steam coming out of his ears from his blush.
While he had his daydream you hurried and quickly brought your meals over, yours looking a bit different than normal catching Tamaki's attention. "Love are you feeling ok? You never eat that." He said pointing to the unusual item on your plate. You gave a shy smile before nodding. "Well I need to start eating it since I'm eating for two after all and-" You froze as soon as those words left your mouth. Tamaki seemed frozen too as he seemed like he was trying to process what you had just said. He looked down at your stomach and back up at your face in disbelief. With a blush on your face you went to retrieve the pregnancy tests to show him. The indigo haired man was silent as he looked at the two positive tests, your belly and then you for a good 10 minutes as he processed that you were in fact pregnant. "A-are you upset?" You asked feeling worried that he didn't actually want children. He didn't answer you with words. Instead he wrapped his arms around you and gave you the biggest kiss he'd ever given you making you practically float on a cloud of happiness. "Upset? Why on earth would I be upset when I'm so happy. I wanted to have a baby with you for so long and now it's finally happening." He honestly wanted to cry. But then the worry of your job came into mind. He brought up his concerns making you nod and think. "Well we've gotten a lot of new students recently. But I'm sure I can reach out to a few hero agencies nearby to ask if they have any heroes that could help out around the school." The idea made your husband breath out in relief. You were already thinking ahead and now you were going to actually mother his children.
Then the final click of realization occurred and Tamaki fainted. "T-tamaki?!" You yelped as you checked on him. He had a silly grin that worried you a little but you knew he was just overloaded with happiness. Giggling, you made yourself a comfy lap pillow for him before looking at your stomach and talking to your unborn child. "Sweetie lets not give daddy too many heart attacks after you're born okay?" You smiled and lovingly brush his bangs aside. He was truly everything you wanted and now you had a new adventure to go on. Nothing seemed better.
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