#at some point it felt weird
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#sweet old gay men#tbh their outfits in pic are boring af compared to tng#also I spent way too long staring at John de Lancie's face trying to get it right#at some point it felt weird#and my mum walked in again#which made it even weirder#sucks to be an adult still living at home with a soft spot for gay old men#qcard#q star trek#picard x q#jean luc picard#captain picard#star trek picard#star trek the next generation#star trek tng#star trek fanart#my art
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it’s already june here but it’s mermay in Most Places still, so here’s some several-years-post-canon codfather
#.png#empires smp#empires s1#the codfather#jimmy solidarity#solidaritygaming#fanart#no id#i am frequently lost on how to describe my own art#artistic nudity#because well. his scales cover everything but he Is technically naked lol#i like to think he went back to get the cod mask at some point#or made a new one#a few years after canon#because he felt weird without it#i was gonna say he felt naked without it but it’s literally the only thing he’s wearing#anyways .#we don’t need to question the beautiful and intricate headcanons that exist in my mind. look at this fish man
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Project: Save Humanity
or something like that
It's no surprise that the Ancients get bored. They are immortal and have all the time in the world to complain about it, sadly Danny joined them after he was crowned.
Their monthly meetings are divided into three topics: Taunting the Observants (Clockwork's favorite topic after they were demoted to helpers, assistants, and other menial jobs), talking about the safety of the Realms (quite peaceful if just as chaotic), and argue.
They- really had nothing to do, and their hobbies eventually bored them. So Danny had a brilliant idea (read: he saw it on a TV show) and decided that they should all become mentors and save one of the dimensions.
Clockwork was about to say that was not a good idea, since it was the same as throwing giants into a world of ants but he needed some fun so he kept quiet. He showed them the dimension of DC and how it was continually being destroyed, the King told them to start their project in that place and select someone.
Clockwork selected Flash because he felt vengeful, Nocturne selected Tim Drake for the same reason, and so they went; each one of the Ancients selecting a "champion" they were going to teach. Although their selection reasons were quite absurd (being that they were selecting their opposite poles or just someone interesting).
Danny being a spirit of protection, selected Jason Todd and secretly Billy Batson, because he was the king and could break the rules (Clockwork rolled his eyes at the comment). The question now was, how did they appear to them and avoid the world's myriad routes of destruction?
Well at least they weren't bored anymore
#dpxdc#ghost king danny#The Ancients got bored#they have nothing to do#so they decided to teach someone#and save the DC dimension#or something among those lines#They actually don't care about the dimension#just want some fun#Flash new mentor is the devil in disguise or have a grudge with him#Tim is not sure why a monster is appearing in his dreams and scolding him about healthy sleeping habits#Jason and Billy met each other in really weird circumstances that included a boy with a big smile and a crown#Superman is pretty sure he is hallucinating#dp x dc#dc x dp#At some point the Ancients will compete between each other#They are really competitive#Constantine wants to retire#Of course he felt all the goods jumping into earth but why are they in earth on first place#They probably forgot their objective of saving humanity along the way#Their champions are really confused and suspicious btw
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Something something perhaps the reason Curly lacks a truly undamaged ID where his face is visible is to represent how much damage Jimmy had already affected on him throughout their relationship and the way Curly obscured part of who he is and what he stood to unintentionally cater to this toxic influence in his life.
#I think there is something to say that most people draw post crash curly and may not have every drawn him pre crash#and I think it says something that we only really look at the characters substantially in relation to Jimmy and not their own merits#unless we are discussing how J I M M Y mischarcterizes them cause in this#since we don’t assign a face and identify to Curly’s actions outside of Jimmy until the end their is the question of how much we are viewing#them as separate entities rather than intertwined actions cause while the flipping#of who we play at shows them and parallels and in separable in terms of the story going down#they couldn’t be drastically more different in thinking and you only really realize that at the birthday scene where Curly felt the need to#take responsibility for something while Jimmy just felt the need to take#this is also more so me thinking about all the reason people think Curly and Jimmy could be friends but they are missing the point of Jimmy#and his dynamic there is nothing severely weird or sinister about Curly or his intentions it’s that he’s well meaning to a fault#he’s an average dude having a mid life crisis and Jimmy is a guy that takes advantage of good intentions like the idea#that curly has to be like Jimmy in some way personality humor morally is the exact sort of projection Jimmy wants#to happen and does like it’s the sad and real case that sometimes people just have friends like Jimmy that they can’t cut off for one reason#or another like it’s not highly philosophical people are friends with objective assholes but it’s less about them#and more about the person feeling some obligation to stay like I feel like crafting him into#being more morally grey is to just make it easier to be angrier or think someone with more of a backbone#could of done something but it’s not even that he was spineless he was just too distracted and sometimes that feel like cowardice like even#Swansea waited it’s just the sad truth of how people avoid people like Jimmy or setting them off#sometimes it just does more harm than good I just am so bored with all the takes#acting like there was a perfect man on that ship and that any one outside of Anya knew the exact type of guy Jimmy#was from the get go like the point is other men wouldn’t in rape culture but women and their victims already know#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#throwing rocks at Jimmy
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sometimes I forget that my experience has been. um. not 'your experiences are not universal' vibes but more like 'your experiences are EXTREMELY atypical'
#red said#recent events have reminded me that my life has involved like. a LOT of other people's psychosis#like not in a way where i have been Beset By Terrifying Crazies bc that's not like. a thing.#but a lot of people in my life have had a lot of really severe psychotic episodes#and i FORGET sometimes. that actually that is an Unusual Amount Of Experience With Psychosis for someone who's not#for somebody who has not really personally ever had psychotic episodes (unless severe PTSD flashbacks count)#actually i tell a lie i have maybe had One psychotic episode but because it was very situational and i knew what was happening#i was able to ride it out. because i am literally only psychotic Inside Hospitals and so that's all fine#as long as i LITERALLY NEVER HAVE TO HAVE INPATIENT CARE. Very important to me to never ever ever require surgery i think.#i can handle the amount of psychosis i get from a 1-4 hour stopoff in hospital#as long as i know I'm leaving soon then i can just Cope with the fact that the walls are moving and reality is thin#ANYWAY that's not the point the point is i forget! that most ppl i know have experience of at most a handful of severe psychotic episodes#some people i know have experienced more for sure. especially if the episodes were mostly theirs.#but people really seem to expect me to be more freaked out by their symptoms of psychosis than i am#bc i don't think i really register it as frightening unless they're in actual danger or Currently Aggressing Actually At Me#like i WORRY about them bc it can super suck but it's not SHOCKING or WEIRD#there have definitely been times ive been frightened. one time i woke up in the night and my friend was standing over me with a knife#but also like he was still HIM he was just having a moment. and as soon as i got the knife off him he just came back and broke down.#and we were fine and he was safe and i learnt the valuable lesson that even when people seem like they wanna kill you they probably don't#tbf now I'm thinking about it it's honestly a tossup whether he was there to threaten or because he felt a need to guard us#like to be clear probably don't try and take a knife off someone having a psychotic break. i was 17 and it was 3am and i knew him very well#i probably did not make the smartest call but nobody got hurt is the point#anyway you know there's that kind of psychotic episode and my granny got very violently angry a few times. buuuut you know there's also#been plenty of other times I've been with somebody having an episode and it's been chill as hell.#my ex saw and heard monsters so much that eventually she just got sick of being scared. we used to watch TV with them#i would sometimes have to sit on a bit of sofa that wasn't haunted and we might not be able to watch certain things bc they didn't like it#most of the time she was hallucinating there was absolutely nothing to worry about we just had a few extra variables#honestly of everyone i know who's had psychotic episodes or schizophrenia the amount of times it's been a material risk#is like. low single figures? maybe low double if you include self harm but idk what the cause and effect is there.#idk why you would need to be frightened like 99.99% of the time it truly is usually just Oh No That Seems Distressing For You I'm Sorry
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Im helping a friend moving out and I just spent like an hour in an elevator with no mirrows
I think a little disconnection from reality
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The many ways I've drawn Sierra's eyes since Feb 2022, in rough chronological order (oldest to newest)
#warframe#mesa sierra#warframe oc#see. I'm very normal#my art#some of them have alt descriptions in case you're curious#yep Sierra at one point (she didn't have a name yet until months later) was a black brown and gold Mesa Prime and had “normal” human eyes#and it carried over once the base mesa design grew on me but it felt weird putting them on top of the bandana#given the original intent behind it#so I played around with it till it became the 3-eyed design it is rn#i'm torn between the bottom middle and bottom right#some of these drawings were definitely not included to show all the pictures in 3's :3#lotsa wips here#would you guys like me to post some of these older ones? even if I find them kinda crappy/incomplete#also ngl I should really vary my lighting setups more... apparently I use the same light beige bg a lot#imagine drawing chars consistently. cant be me#i'm happy to have drawn so much because of this rascal though#fun fact the “eyes” on her bandana are just external neuroptics#her real one is found underneath like umbra's sunder helm
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I am so so happy that lucanis' sensible neutral toned knitted sweater beneath his brooding hotboy black leathers turned out to be exactly the design cue crucial to understanding the actual nature of his character and personality that I took it for the first time we saw his default look fhsdkj. I continue to be enchanted by this detail in particular. it really does say it all
#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age: the veilguard#lucanis dellamorte#dragon age spoilers#I was actually not that interested in him in the first phase of the companion reveals until I spotted that and went 'OH-KAY MAYBE??#WE MIGHT HAVE SOMETHING HERE???'#reader... we did have something here & it was everything I could not have dreamt and then some that's exactly what he's like#he's wearing sensible woollen socks while we're running around the anderfels too I know this in my heart#longjohns with knitted patterns of crows and eyes on them. see my vision here and know it as at least the spiritual truth#sorry to be lucanisposting incessantly but you see. I am obsessed. I love this weird lil crow dude so much#garrus levels of emotional security being felt here which is so funny considering how sleep deprived and unstable#he also is at this point in my playthrough fhskadj. and still hearing him say things in his soft little voice makes me feel so safe#just when everything is at its darkest he says something crazy in the most casual straightforward way and light pours into the world#to go 'wait hang on WHAT'
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2024 reads / storygraph
Outdrawn
f/f contemporary romance
two cartoonist who’ve been rivals since uni, and now have competing webcomics online, have to work together on the relaunch of a cult classic at the comic press they both work at
they both struggle with art-related physical and mental health issues, and complicated families
#outdrawn#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#sapphic books#I thought this was decent! I liked the concept (even if I got distracted by some art related things…)#and the dynamic between the characters was good. I enjoyed their relationship development broadly speaking#and the emphasis on communication; though it was a quick flip into being together all of a sudden.#The sketchbook doodle flirting was cute. Some interesting exploration of their complicated family situations too.#There’s a lot of exploration of burnout and carpal tunnel and the dangers of artists overworking which I think are important conversations#and are done with some nuance. But it’s pretty much all discussed in the context of the personal pressure they put on themselves#rather than the industry corporate greed and artificial competition created by the comic platform - which are significant in this story!#It felt odd that that connection wasn’t really ever made?#I know that this is a romance and nitpicking the background plot is beside the point and also that I am not a big romance reader#but the premise that the comic hosting site archives everything; wipes the leaderboard; and out of nowhere has a comic competition for#new weekly chapters…I’m sorry but the art world would riot. Even if people enter because they’re desperate for the cash they’d be pissed#People live off the income from their webcomics! if they were erased (temporarily) with no notice…..there would be crimes committed istg#I simply don’t believe that it would be doable to create a new weekly webcomic with no notice while you also have a full-time comic job#(especially as the only stylistic choices mentioned are full-colour) - not to mention what happened to their 8-years-running webcomics#that were archived? they don’t think about them at all after the beginning? surely they’d care about that?#And then with their new comics they make for this competition (after work I guess) we get vague snippets about them but barely anything#- if they’re consuming that much of your time I would expect to feel like they’re thinking about them all the time#rather than the vaguest discussion about genre and cast numbers only.#I guess I just think the whole comic site stunt felt unnecessary for the plot anyway -#it would have worked exactly the same if they were just competing on the normal leaderboard with their normal comics???#anyway - I’m not judging TOO hard about all that because again I know it’s not the point and maybe the industry is like that in some place#Unfortunately it was distracting enough to affect my feelings on the book tho lol.#Lastly: the audiobook………oof. The narrators talk at different speeds; for one.#And Sage’s VA does this deeply weird raspy-anime-teen-boy voice for Noah which is such an odd choice#and doesn’t match her character at all.#unforch my library only had the audiobook (what I usually prefer) so I just had to sort of….translate the narration into a normal voice lol#anyway the romance is good tho
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Quick question?
How many of you believe that Ichigo did in fact die after Byakuya pierced his Saketsu and Hakusui?
#bleach#ichigo kurosaki#byakuya kuchiki#because I do...#it could be a great plot point for any fanfiction#and it could go a bit angsty — Do I refuse to believe Ichigo would actually be mad at Byakuya.#or Ichigo could reveal he'd always suspected that#that — in some way — his human body had never truly felt ''normal'' since the Encroachment#I also found it weird that the encroachment happened while he was in human form???#unless he was indeed a powerless dead soul unaware he was dead
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have i mentioned how great cats are. there's a lil guy in my house and when i lay my head on her side she starts purring so hard <3 and ten seconds later she will try to open my wrist with her teeth <3 truly the best <3
#shes just a silly goofy little guy.....#miss war crimes.... mister menace... bastard... her royal highness <3#she holds all of these titles And More#no ones doing it like her!!!#she eats spiders & makes funny noises that instantly Boosts my criminally low happy chemicals#sorry i looked at her for too long and was once more overcome by a strange emotion i believe some call love#affection? delight?? all three....#and i Had to publicly post about her#i am very proud of my tiny fluffy friend & her general Existence. i must flaunt her#oh how horrible! a couple of tendons in my neck just rubbed together in a very terrible way#what the Fuck. i wish i could reach in there and pluck on em a lil. make sure theyre in the right places#felt that in my Ear....#absolutely unprompted#oh speaking of weird things cause yall know i love to ramble and overshare#i think! i Hypothesize! that there's a slight.... Disconnect between my eyes#my depth perception is fine and i can See#but theres somethin fucky w my vision and focus#nothing is blurry! but it looks like it should be! i dont know how to explain it!#its like my quality of vision has dwindled but not in a way i can describe or really point out#but it Is slightly harder to read and like... See things?#its almost as if i have a few tiny blind spots.#i first noticed this happening after my terrible no good double-decker-migraine weekend#it very slowly got slightly better but then i had Another migraine the other day (ugh and a left brain one at that)#and im back to square one! my visions all fucky again! my peripherals suck!#in other news my house is. so warm. its 2 am. my shirt is toasty enough to keep tortillas warm#i hope everyone is having a good week#and if youre not! theres always the next one! and little delights sprinkled throughout! get yourself a tasty treat you deserve it!
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#potentially hot take#but sometimes i get the sense that some people genuinely don't want taylor to do something right so they can have an extra stick to bash her#because i just can't wrap my head around being FURIOUS that she provided an important endorsement#when a lot of fans myself included felt that it should be done at some point in this election cycle#i don't like making major assumptions like that but some of the stuff i'm seeing is starting to get really weird...#again would you rather she stay quiet the entire election cycle? or what
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I still maintain there was (and probably still is) a very weird circlejerk surrounding whump/angst in the LU fandom
#fires posts#ramblings#negative#we were just talking about it on the friend server but yeah wth#obvs I'm still in the fandom just much more withdrawn#but back in the days of the LU server the culture around it was very very weird#like if you wrote wh/ump it's as if u were part of some elite club#and said club was always trying to one up each other in who could torture X Link the most#to the point where it was often borderline fetishistic#and like I don't caaaare I'm just gonna stay away from u if you're into that#but being but a humble hurt/comfort writer often felt very isolating#even when you wanted to talk about your fic ideas some rando would join and be like “How can we hurt him more?”#it was very uncomfortable
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im really just. obsessed with the idea of ted and beard's pre-series early friendship. like. from the immediate aftermath of their little les mis tale (how ted might have felt upon realizing what happened, how beard felt when ted showed up and lied for him anyway, what happened literally immediately afterwards, when they were finally alone--does beard confront him, demand in that sort of trying-to-sound-angry-but-it's-just-cracked-and-distressed-and-disbelieving raised high pitched voice why did you do that? i did it, i stole from you, or does he just. sit there, in silence with him, and then quietly apologize? or is it ted that breaks the silence?) to like. beard sticking with him and continuing to get to know him deciding he's giving this man his loyalty forever, and then beard getting to know him properly, seeing the less-than-perfect sides of him, seeing him get irritated or angry or maudlin, helping him when he's at his lowest, too, and while beard still feels deep down like he owes ted--ted, who gave him a chance and gave him love when he had no one and nothing--he now knows him as a full and multi-faceted person, they've helped each other in equal measure and love each other in equal measure and know each other in equal measure. beard willingly opens up and shares--even with his mysteriousness--and ted, too, actually lets himself be at least somewhat vulnerable, moreso than he had with anyone else. beard doesn't think ted's "too much", ted doesn't find beard's beardness offputting. it's not perfect--ted still has a hell of a lot of repression and problems of his own (although beard is no longer blind to them) and beard has issues, too; they don't share everything or have a perfect friendship, but god is it a strong one. and by the time we meet them, they're so in sync and they support each other and know each other better than anyone else.
#ted lasso#coach beard#ted lasso tv#ted lasso spoilers#ted lasso s3 spoilers#personally i think this is far more powerful (and also far more funny ngl) if it's not romantic but i understand why some people ship it#the grounds are definitely there#but also consider how goddamn funny it is if these bizarre perfectly in sync weirdos are just Like That. completely platonically#they've genuinely made out as friends before and that isn't a romcommunism they're just Like That#on a more serious note i wonder how michelle felt about that#and jane feels about that (definitely weird and jealous)#and how a future partner--yall know im rooting for trent for ted lol--would feel about it#bc they're kind of a package deal at this point aren't they#(desperately ignores that it seems likely that they're going to be separated in the finale)
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rrarauhh these have been in my sketchbook for Literally Months; iwas gonna clean em up but if i donot post them as is they willnot be posted so ^_^ woe. funy realization designs be upon ye.
ecstasy, mimicry, and moonlight angies respectively; ft. roland cameo on the right. because Two Of Them :]
#these r in that weird limbo of Almost But Not Quite where i Do like them but they need just a lil push for me t say theyre Done yknow.#anyway.#pikart#projmoon#ft me trying t edit w my offkilter monitor ''>w>#dreamingcurrent is dreamingcurrent but alsoooo.#mimicry angie bc its on my mind a lot. not just bc i like mimicry but also not Not because of that#iwanted t play more w the blurring of lines btwn human and machine; wires and nerves and oil and blood and flesh and silicone. etc.#the inherent body horror of slowly shifting from one extreme to the other; metamorphosis; a stilted newness almost.#but also playing on other people's perception of Wrongness tying in with angelas desire to Be. etc etc etc... you understand.#and then moonlight.. ijust kinda felt in my soul ok.#ft. angie as the performer and roland as the piano. bc i thought it was funny. ^_^#also bc roland deserves t kill it in a gown again. w a side of mourners veil... would fit right in w cheseds floor were it not themed.#something abt jaded acceptance and grief.#angela gets to be a creature again also. because she deserves it.#RRAUGH id go off more but im already um .well. lol. anyway i knew at some point ifeel it in my Soul but not in my Words. yay ^_^
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i like vows & vengeance well enough but i do wish that rather than a full story featuring an independent protagonist, they had done small side stories for each of the companions pre-game (without needing to connect them to that protagonist). if the selling point of the podcast is the companions then I want to hear about them, not have them be minor features in another character's story.
#britt says#vows & vengeance spoilers#not really but i want some sort of tag for this and dont want it in the main tag#but yeah maybe i misunderstood but it felt like the advertising leaned heavily on companion presence that just isnt there#and i dont dislike the main characters of the podcast they're just not who im looking to hear about#if anything having an out of game protag be a connecting point between all the companions (and the antagonist) who ISN'T rook feels weird#obviously they're not starting a crew with nadia but she'll still be a central connection between all of them#maybe im just sad we havent heard more about who rook can be and there's a player envy if that makes sense#anyway its a nice show overall just not exactly what i was hoping for
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