#at my college there were 5-10 jewish ppl in my year alone that went to the same summer camp as me

[dykeseinfeld]

bro i’m so stupid this whole time we’ve been pretending that jack and holster met in juniors and their rivalry started there. they’re both jewish they Obviously met at summer camp

[fruitbattery]

I saw the MOST amazing production (open dress rehearsal) of falsettos the other night!

It was in a tiny theatre. TINY, black box style, <50 seats. we were RIGHT IN FRONT. it was amazing.

-the set was literally: 6 chairs, 10 boxes, a hospital bed -4 jews started as a sock puppet show from behind the boxes (except for Trina) and then they all popped up as they said their names -(the cast was all so pretty and i am so gay) -their Jason was a college age woman and I believed her wholly, she was so good -at the end of 4 jews, they posed like they were taking a family photo and then marvin got up and started singing tight knit family -for love is blind, marvin and whizzer were in the background reading, marvin was on a chair and whizzer on the floor leaning into him. it was cute.  -the transitions between songs required additional music a lot but that was ok -thrill of first love was??? so good? -whizzer pulled a silly pose at “i was trained in karate” it was great -they yelled the 9/10 months bit and the won’t/don’t bit -the fight choreo happened as whizzer stealing marvin’s scarf and them fighting over it -they ended up on the floor after whizzer pulled marvin in with the scarf and sat on his lap??? which i think is actually better than on the couch but ya know. sightlines are important i guess -can i just reiterate how good jason was like she was SO GOOD -throughout marvin at the psychiatrist, whizzer and trina had super visible but subtle reactions like eye rolling -for “my father’s a homo,” and for a lot of the show, jason sang right at the audience -he jumped on the table it was so cute! -trina’s indicating to whizzer behind jason’s back was NOT SUBTLE AT ALL there was no way the kid didn’t notice that -when the “late for dinner late again” section started, a strip of unexpected disco lights came on!!! it was great -trina belted “and still the bastard divorced me!!!!” and it made my night -I’M BREAKING DOWN WAS SO GOOD -she used the space a lot it was great; she covered the whole stage -she came onstage with a bunch of bananas and i heard someone behind me say “oh no” -she did eat a piece of banana but earlier in the song, before “you ask me is it fun to cry over nothing” -she made eye contact with my friend at “help me!!!!” and she DIED -she crushed pieces of banana in her hands so she had to wipe them on her apron before picking up the phone to call mendel -mendel answered with “yes this is mendel weisenbachfeld” like in the revival! -the disco lights came on for the final section of “feel alright for the rest of your life” -marriage proposal was simple and cute -”this is how you do a marriage proposal” and then jason went “GO” and shoved them together omg. then he ran off -tkf reprise was simple -at this point i am in love with the actress playing trina because she KILLS trina’s song. wow. -march of the falsettos was very jewish! they were all sitting on boxes, with scarves like tallitot, and prayer books covering their faces. simple box switching choreography -trina is wonderful -in the chess game it was SUPER clear that whizzer was mocking marvin in the 2nd verse. -he got up at “more’s the pity” -marvin got his suitcase immediately, then whizzer walked off sadly. he turned around when he was almost out to sing his part of the argument. “whizzer’s supposed to make the dinner” etc -in making a home they put a mezuzah on the door!!!!! !!!!!! -when they sang “yes we love the bed” mendel slapped her ass and she giggled -at the end they each sat down to read and froze for the games i play -omg whizzer was so good!!! -he started the song smiling like he was trying to make light of his situation but got serious fast -he made eye contact with me and i DIED -during marvin hits trina, trina just looked so DONE and ANNOYED during the beginning of i never wanted to love you, mendel was holding her and touched her face where she’d been slapped, and she told him stop, and he stopped. that was nice. -jason was practically screaming during that song and it was so heartbreaking -father to son has everyone crying. i could hear it. at the end, it was only jason who got up, and it looked like he was gonna leave marvin there alone, but then he went for the hug and we started crying more

act 2!!! -ppl laughed a lot at the weird woodwind/chime wiggle thing that happens in the intro music -mendel only had once flashlight and made it look like he was telling a ghost story when he said “homosexuals” which was really funny -PRETTY BOYS ARE IN DEMAND -charlotte and cordelia!!!!! holy fuck they were perfect!  -for the whee! woo! part they were all sitting on blocks. it was trina on mendel’s lap, whizzer, marvin, jason, cordelia on charlotte’s lap -JASON HAD SUCH FUNKY DANCE MOVES FOR YEAR OF THE CHILD -the whole audience knew what the words were it was glorious. i know because they laughed -mendel gave the spiel about how his own bar mitzvah was bad to marvin and trina rather than to jason, like he was convincing them not to have jason do it -during the beginning of miracle of judaism, jason was pulling on baseball clothes over his clothes and packing a backpack to take to a game -at one point he held the bat between his legs like a giant dick and sang “girls with whom i always wake up” -the baseball game!!!! was so similar to the revival version!! staging wise -marvin was SO touchy with whizzer’s hair and trina was so annoyed lmao -the actor playing whizzer had so much hair but they did the bald spot anyway -jason’s actor played caroline instead of cordelia’s, which i guess makes more sense if it works -she got angrier when she said “you always do this” -trina’s workout gear involved a leotard and leg warmers. when she came on people whistled (I think they were her irl friends) -it looked like they used actual gefilte fish for the nouvelle bar mitzvah cuisine??? -whizzer was in tiny jean shorts to play tennis. so impractical honestly, all that chafing -instead of marvin collapsing and whizzer standing over him, they got really close to each other and almost kissed like 3 times. shit was cute. -i didn’t realize that in the original script jason wanders onstage during the last overlapping bit of a day in falsettoland and says “you guys are so white” but it was funny -when “i want the appelbaums” started, people laughed in recognition (i tell you boston is full of jews lmao. love it.) -mendel got up on a chair for his imitation of god, and stole the tablecloth to cover his head with -near the end of the song, mendel cleared a space for himself very dramatically, psyched himself up, and did the worst cartwheel i have ever seen. jason then did the same. -for what more can i say, they didn’t have a bed or anything resembling one, so marvin sat at the end of a row of 4 or 5 chairs and whizzer laid across them with his head in marvin’s lap -for the final “what more can i say” whizzer sat up and they gazed into each others’ eyes for a second -hoo boy here comes the pain train -charlotte and cordelia’s dynamic was a+ honestly. -tbh I know every word to this show and something bad is happening was still worrying and terrifying -in more raquetball, marvin was getting SUPER cocky. and then it all just went away when wizzer fell. heartbreaking. -in between something bad and holding to the ground, marvin helped whizzer over to dr charlotte and you could see him nonverbally insisting he was fine before collapsing onto her shoulder and allowing himself to be led away -trina’s performance in holding to the ground was phenomenal. so much emotion. marvelous and amazing. -i swear i heard sobs as the hospital bed came on -there was real chicken soup in cordelia’s tupperware!!! -jason set up the chess board fully after climbing onto the bed with whizzer, he then just packed it right back up again -mendel and trina in cancelling the bar mitzvah was just. lovely. and fucking sad too -unlikely lovers was SO TENDER i swear -when the lesbians showed up, marvin and whizzer were sitting there with their foreheads touching and marvin was almost in whizzer’s lap which was kind of an inversion??? idk it was great -just pure love -jason was so cute and innocent during another miracle. it was much needed. -then holy fuck -dr charlotte pulled marvin away for something bad reprise and she was crying. full on. she hit all the words and notes but shit. it got to me. -ok so you gotta die sometime is one of my favorite songs of all time. certainly my fave solo song to sing myself. -he nailed it. he was just so callous at the beginning morphing to fucking terrified at the end. it looked like if jason had come one second later he would’ve given up and died. -but there was a gap between it and the beginning of jason’s bar mitzvah still which was completely silent. pin drop silent. it was interesting -jason came in already in a suit -at “mendel get this thing in gear” the bed was rolled off and didn’t come back which must’ve been convenient -at “oh mummy” they actually kissed for a few seconds and trina looked,,, unamused -they all wore white kippot -at the end. oh god. -jason finished his torah and whizzer almost collapsed. mendel caught him. and jason just started sobbing. silently, but think harry-potter-after-sirius-fell-through-the-veil levels of despair. fuck it was sad. trina took him away. -the cast cleared the stage during the beginning of what would i do, but they left the “table” made of blocks that jason read torah on -marvin forgot the words so he substituted “once i was told that all men get what they deserve” for “god only knows too soon i’ll remember your faults” but it was ok -i swear the whole theatre started crying 2x as much when whizzer came out dressed like he had been -they circled each other unable to touch a few times. it killed me. -at the end, marvin put a rose that trina brought him on the table, now clearly a gravestone. then he cried into his family.  -jason was on stage after everyone had left. i knew about the chess piece but he also kissed his hand and touched the grave which is??? so jewish??? and so touching??? idk but it was terrible and horrible and ripped my heart out of its socket -after the final piano faded out you could hear how many people were sniffling.

in conclusion this was a monumental experience. we got to see backstage after because the music director, who invited us, is also the music director for our school’s musicals (fiddler this year!) i met the actress who played cordelia and she said she could tell i knew the show which probably meant i was unconsciously mouthing the words despite my best efforts not to.

ok thanks for reading this word vomit that my adhd detail oriented brain poured out.

[noahhernandez]

original (April 3rd, 2013)

3 year difference (April 3rd, 2016

Difference ? (Feb 10, 2017)

3 year difference lol

1. Is this the best year of your life? tbh this year has sucked so far lol!!!!!

it is april and i have not turned up like expected

Only Feb. Things are going okay

2. What was the first thing you did when you woke up? turn on the TV and see what was on netflix

Laid in bed and contemplate whether or not to make coffee.. i did

Struggled getting out of bed for work

3. The person you like is? nobody.

my co-worker Darrell.

Kenny.

4. Is anything bothering you? The fact that my room is a disaster, my grade in Algebra 2 is a 68, and that i am not famous

The fact that my room is still a disaster and that i am dropping my biology course because it was too hard for me.

The Fact that my room remains a disaster, and that I’m constantly stressed out about school, and I’m really trying with Kenny but I’m probably too invested

5. Does anyone annoy you? A lot of people do, white people

A lot of people still annoy me

White People

6. Would you like things to go ‘back to normal’ with a certain someone? no

Angelica, Natasha, and Coby because things really were cool but it doesnt matter anymore

No.

7. What was the las,t thing you did before you went to bed last night? I was in my mom’s room with like 3 kids and some guy and i was just chillin out with them

I was laying in bed watching Family Guy

Filmed a speech for my public speaking class, finished it, submitted it, walked in on my roommates fckin on the couch, went to sleep, they fought til 530am

8. Is life good? its decent

I’m content, I have my own place, I go to school full time, I work full time, I’ve got great friends, money, a car.

Still have all those things, I’m just tired at this point

9. Do you remember who you liked on New Years? nobody.

Nobody probably wait just kidding Harry

I think I was starting to like Kenny

10. Do you still like them? nobody

No

I like him now

11. Do you still speak to them? nobody

No

Yes

12. Told your parents you were going somewhere but went somewhere else? my dad, but my mom and i have a good relationship and i can tell her i am snorting cocaine tonight and she will be like ’ ok be careful xo’

Does not matter anymore

i’m an adult now

13. Are you dating the last person you kissed on the lips? haha, no.

No I am not

Nope

14. Do you hate the last girl you had a conversation with? my cousin no she snorts cocaine

My manager no she is my favorite

I think it was Angel, and she is like one of my best friends

15. Would you go out with someone right now if they asked? what do you mean like out like lets get together or like hey im hungry wanna come with me to get wings

It really all depends on who the person is

not desperate, really depends on who the person would be

16. Three days from now will you be in a relationship? i hope not

No lol

Probably not 

17. If someone liked you right now, would you want them to tell you? they do tell me sorry fellas youre kinda ugly

Yes

Yes

18. Have you kissed anyone in the last month? no

No

Yes

19. What was the last reason you went to the doctor for? my back.

My back

Have not been to the doctor since.

20. Do you like being home alone or does it freak you out? i liked it but then everyone left for me a week and i thought i was going to go insane

It does not matter I am always locked in my room.

I don’t talk to anyone at home anyways

21. Would you ever kiss anyone you texted today? i havent texted anyone today

Hm yes, my co-worker Kevin, but only because he is the best looking person I have texted today

Hm maybe like 2 people ? haha

22. Do you have any bruises on you? no thank god

Cuts and burns from work

I cut myself at work today

23. How was 2011 for you? 2011 was great actually, i ended jr. high really well, and started high school really well too making friends and stuff

Same

lol

24. How late did you stay up last night and why? like 1230, and no reason

230? because after work me and my coworkers went to IHOP and then just chilled out, and I watched like TV til i fell asleep

About 530 because my roommates were fighting and I could not sleep

25. Do you ever get good morning texts from anyone? no

No

Kind of

26. Do you regret anything you’ve done lately? i regret um nothing

I regret nothing still

Nothing

27. What woke you up today? this sound of little Einsteins singing

My brothers gf was talking really loud for like 2 seconds

My brother waking me up and my 30 alarms

28. What makes you happy? coffee and snickers and boys

Coffee, cigarettes, friends

Coffee, boys, and friends

29. Ever kissed on a boat?

No

Still a no

30. Have you ever been told that you are amazing? yes

Plenty of times

I honestly dont think so tbh wait JK yes

31. Finish this sentence: The last person I kissed is… ugly?

A good guy. sorry lol

the person I currently like

32. This time last year, can you remember who you liked?let me think no

It is April, prom season for me… you know I think I was chillin’

Wowza, Darrell my co-worker at the time, he recently just moved to Ohio

33. Do you like when people play with your hair? yes

yes

ya

34. Do you plan on sleeping in tomorrow? nOPE GOT SCHOOL LOL

Nope, I still got school

Nope, this time I got work

35. Waiting for something? for someone to come up and be like hello u wana be famous and rich

To get my degree, then someone come up to me and ask me if I wanna be famous and rich

To become board certified and open a private practice and someone ask me if I wanna be rich adn famous

36. Was last night terrible? nah

No, it was a good night tbh, lots of laughing with all my coworkers

Sure

37. Did you lose friends when you started dating someone? no

no, i would not let that happen

I would never let that happen

38. Are you the type of person to make people laugh?  yes i am i am the class bitch ass motherfucker but they think im joking

yes

Sure

39. Don’t tell me lies, so is the last person you texted attractive? i last texted angelica and she is pretty if she tries which is rare

yes

yes

40. Is tomorrow going to be a good day? it better be mrs honings better have passes me

no, i have school and then work right after

Work til 5. Maybe something with my friends after, but I doubt it

41. Are you missing someone?no

no

sure

42. Has anyone ever tried to ruin a relationship you were in?no

no lol

no haha

43. Do you believe in karma? eh

not at all

Maybe a little bit now

44. Do you sleep with a fan on? omg i have too

yeah the ceiling fan and then a standing fan

Same still

45. You think anyone’s thinking about you right now? of course yes

i wonder

Probably not.

46. Is there anyone you wish you were spending time with right now? not really

no

yes

47. Do you go to school? imma sophomore

freshmen in college

4th semester in college.

48. Is the person you last texted single? yes

yes

technically yeS?

49. Who was driving the last time you were in a car? omg?? my mom i think

me

I was driving, brother in passenger seat

50. Have you ever used the word ‘rawr’ in an actual conversation?OMG NEVER IF ANYONE CAUGHT ME SAYING THAT I’D KILL MYSELF

lol no

jokingly now every once in awhile

51. Are the blinds on your window open or closed? closed

closed

Closed

52. Did you leave milk and cookies for Santa when you were little? still do lol

jewish

No i live alone now, so thats a waste of money

53. What were you doing at 11 last night? in my mom’s room with those people i stated above plus my brother

at work goofing off

Getting ready to get off work

54. What could you eat any day of the week & never get tired of? wingstop wings

sushi

Coffee

55. Is there someone you wouldn’t mind kissing right now? justin bieber???

a lot of ppl including celebrities

Shawn Mendes!!!

56. Someone knocks on your window at 5 am, what do you say? wat the fuck do u want im sleepig

or

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOMH

how did u get up here i live on the third floor

No i dont have a quarter

57. Would you change yourself for the person you love?no

no

Yes maybe ??

58. Let me guess, your last incoming call was from the opposite sex? wow u guesssed completely wrong

yes

um i gonna guess sure

59. What are you supposed to be doing right now? cleaning

getting ready for work

Getting ready for bed

60. Would you have sex with the 5th person on your contacts?no

im not even going to look

It is my ex, lmao, yes  I would sure

61. To who did you last give the finger to? i cant remember

my coworker Jesse

My manager, Ware

62. Did your last kiss take place on a bed? on someone elses

uh no

No.

63. Do you have someone who you can be your complete self around? brianna sam angelica michelle and others yes

the majority of my coworkers and all of my friends i still have

Angel, Brianna, Brit, and like Michelle

64. Do you talk in your sleep? no

i do not

depends on the situation

65. Do you have a good relationship with your parents? yes they buy me stuff and i am forced to like them

i dont talk to either of them that much

Haven’t seen my mom in months

66. What time did you wake up today? 7:45

1

8:30

67. What were you doing at midnight last night? IN MY MOMS ROOM

At work fixing to leave

Leaving work

68. What song are you listening to? some chris brown song

Team by Iggy

Betty Who- Somebody Loves You

69. Has anyone put their arms around you in the past 5 days? like a hug

No

Yes

70. How do you feel about chocolate-covered strawberries? mmmmm

mmmmm

mmmmm

71. Do you have nice eyes? they’re dark brown

no

lolno

72. Is your current hair color your natural hair color? not really

yes finally

Barely, the tips are brown from when I died them 7 months ago

73. Are you texting anybody? no

no

Told everyone I went to bed

74. Do you swear in front of your parents? god no

no

No

75. Concert tickets or NFL game tickets? concert tickets

concert tickets!!!!!

CONCERT

76. Are you addicted to cigarettes? not yet hehhe!:)

yes, I wish i could stop smoking.

LMFAO “Not Yet” I’m on a process of quitting right now. Very difficult

77. Do you tell your parents everything? no

no

hell no

78. Do you have any tattoos? not yet

i have 4 tattoos.

still only fucking 4

79. If something was wrong, who is the first girl you would go to? idk

Brianna

80. Do you have any nicknames? bitch

Noahita