#at least I can rewind now
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queenofthegaylions · 2 years ago
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Yo this is definitely the quickest game over I’ve ever gotten
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skyllion-uwu · 1 year ago
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Feeling so justified in putting "Famous Prophets (Stars)" by Car Seat Headrest in my Siffrin playlist now. It's one of my go-to timeloop related songs but the more I play, the better I see how much it really does fit them. "Apologies to future mes and yous", when the Head Housemaiden does her speech about Siffrin having to go back. "Did I waste my time, waste my time on a broken heart?" Siffrin starting to doubt if it's worth going through and helping everyone because all he'll get is the same exact ending. "The ocean washed over your grave", them waking up on the beach of the island without any of his memories. That last one solidified it for me. I'm sure there's more but I just woke up, maybe one day I'll do a section by section breakdown but that time isn't now. But like. Just go listen to the song and you'll get it
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arolesbianism · 6 months ago
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I've been digging up some one of my most neglected stories recently and I'm finally actually developing the rest of the cast after like what? 7 or 8 years or smth? I genuinely don't know when I first thought up Lace but she's been floating at the edge of my mind since then as my token true timeloop guy as opposed to Butters who doesn't rly count because the quote unquote timeloop was entirely within their control and only was a continuous loop because they kept consciously trying again and again. Lace on the other hand. Legitimately 100% powerless in her timeloop situation, as in there was quite literally Nothing she could do to end the loops herself. Some gods just threw her in a 50 year timeloop without even doing the bare minimum of telling her first and she just sorta had to live with that until it from her perspective abruptly stopped leaving her to deal with the fallout of everything she went through now that she's suddenly being forced to live a real life again. And as fun as all of that is it has been very stagnated for years because there is in fact a story and world that exists outside of and around this one plot that matter quite a bit and that I have been refusing to properly work on until now lol.
#rat rambles#oc posting#take a wild guess as to why Im thinking abt this story again#anyways longggg story short this is a world filled with various gods that run various kingdoms and such#and some of them have been at war for a long time leaving things for the common folk very unstable and chaotic#due to this adventuring parties started helping ppl out and some of them would gain the blessing of their local god(s)#nowadays its very uncommon for there to be prevelant parties without at least one blessed member and theres some gods who even have set up#schools of sorts for aspiring heros that tend to be very competitive and hard to get into#in the original version of the timeline of this story most of the cast except one met at this school and graduated as a party together#they proceeded to travel around doing their work and picking up their last party member and bonding and all that#until eventually they found out that the god they work under was planning some apocalypse level shit in order to establish control over the#entire planet and the crew turned on her and tried to stop her and got close enough that she took desperate mesures to stop them#she contacted the god of time and commissioned them to rewind and edit the timeline#and while the timeline editing meant that they couldnt rewind enough to go before two of the party were attending the school#they were able to rewrite lace out of the timeline and was able to help sentence them to a timeloop sentence#lace was specifically targeted for being the one who figured most of this stuff out in the first place#now this is where the timeline get a bit wonky because her timeloop actually takes place later on then when time was reset to#it mostly just took a while to get the loop set up but its still a mostly undetermined amount of time later atm as it rly depends on whats#most convenient for me as I develop the rest of her old party more#since they still end up forming a party together anyways despite the best efforts of two powerful gods#Im also planning on adding another member to their party who wasnt in the original party so lace can get upset abt it#but yeah currently the rest of the party includes lace's unnamed older sister and three other losers whos designs have been sitting on my#toyhouse for a while lol#theres raiden who's the sort of adopted child of the god they used to serve#and the theres hill who was the one in the original party who they picked up after graduating and she and lace used to be gay together#and lastly theres choice who was supposed to attend the school but in the current version of reality had their wagon shot down and#wasnt able to make it and has been rly upset and frustrated abt that#the last one is probably going to be a potion guy or smth#Ive also been having a fun time thinkng abt how both versions of the party managed combat since both parties distinctly lack a healer#anyways Im going to bed now gn
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poughkeepsies · 1 year ago
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have been hyperfixating on practicing french recently this is the first time in 10 years my brain is being used for something other than gay sex and i dont like it
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nereidprinc3ss · 10 months ago
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do you believe me now? | 2
in which fem!reader is feeling insecure about how inexperienced she is around spencer's friends and seeks his expertise to amend the problem
series masterlist
18+ (smut) warnings/tags: inexperienced reader, oral f receiving, (MUNCH!SPENCE RETURNS), fingering, (very) insecure reader, softdom!spencer, sub reader, nipple stuff, kinda sorta implied age gap, god i'm probably forgetting things pls lmk if i missed something important a/n: i've been laboring at this bad boy every day for so long i had to immediately post once it was completed lol. there will be a part three ... maybe i already started it ..... anyway i love u guys and i hope this is a satisfactory part two!! PLS lmk if you liked it!! hearing from u makes my day :')
When Spencer dropped you off at Penelope’s apartment for your first girl’s night—the hostess had promised you, JJ, and Emily lots of gossip sans 'icky men'—you had been ecstatic. You wouldn’t stop rambling to him about how excited you were. 
When he picks you up two and a half hours later, he can hardly get a word out of you. 
It’s not his fault, of course—well, not really, anyway. It’s just that all the girls had wanted to talk about was sex. A topic on which you held very little expertise and had essentially nothing to contribute. Out of the four, you were the only non-FBI agent, the youngest, and undoubtedly the least experienced. It was like high school all over again, except you actually desperately wanted to impress Spencer’s friends. All in all, you weaseled your way out of sharing without giving away that you were still very much a virgin. Sure, you could have said ‘we did hand stuff two weeks ago’, but you had a feeling these women wouldn’t consider that very impressive. 
But you can’t easily relay that information to Spencer—even when he immediately picks up on your sullen mood. He asks you what’s wrong as you make your way down the echoey staircase, but you hold back, muttering something along the lines of we’ll talk about it later. 
Later doesn’t come on the sidewalk outside. It doesn’t come in the car, or at any point during the twenty minute drive, but you feel it rapidly approaching as you climb the stairs to Spencer’s apartment. He unlocks the door and holds it open for you, doesn’t speak as you kick off your shoes and wander aimlessly into the living room.
“Did you eat?” He finally asks, hanging his keys on a hook by the door and glancing over to where you linger in the center of the room like a ghost. 
“Not hungry.”
You both know that wasn’t the question, but he lets it go. 
“Alright... well, I was thinking—“
“Why haven’t we had sex?”
The question flies from your mouth before you can stop it. It tastes like metal and you wish you could take it back as you stand there, cheeks hot and awaiting a reply. It seems you’ve thoroughly astonished Spencer as he gapes at you like a fish out of water for several silent moments, eventually opting to shove his hands in his pockets and shake his head at the wall as he processes the question. 
“I… I don’t know. We just haven’t. Does that bother you?”
Suddenly your whole body feels intolerably warm. Your fingers twitch against your thighs. Of course it bothers you. 
“Do you just not want to? You aren’t attracted to me like that?”
God, you despise how fragile your voice sounds—how much you obviously care, how insecure you clearly are. Spencer picks up on it, despite your most fervent wishing that he wouldn’t, and approaches, stopping a few feet away. You stare at the span of oriental design on the floor between your feet. 
“That’s not at all what I said, angel. I wish you wouldn’t put words in my mouth.”
“Well, then… say something else,” you plead quietly, childishly, still unable to meet his eyes. Prove me wrong. 
He sighs, which does not bode well for you. You wonder if you accidentally triggered the early demise of your relationship and christ do you wish you could rewind. When he steps closer, when his hands find your arms, you’re not sure where to look. But the low, sweet tone of his voice entices you to finally meet his gaze, charmed like a snake as his eyes dart between yours. 
“You know that’s not how I feel.”
You shake your head earnestly, looking up at him with wide eyes as he slowly rubs your arms. 
“No. No, I don’t know that.”
Spencer frowns, glancing at your lips as he speaks. It’s impossible to not do the same when he’s standing so close. 
“But I’ve told you. I don’t understand how you couldn’t know how far from the truth that is.”
You think back to two weeks ago—the first and only time he’d ever done anything more than kiss you. A different kind of flush replaces the shameful one in your cheeks as you try to make your case and not get distracted by the memories of his hands all over you.
“So why won’t you prove it?”
It’d been intended to come out cool, but instead you sound a little desperate, a little out of breath as you realize you and Spencer somehow ended up so close to each other you can feel the warmth radiating from his body. 
“Is that what you need from me? More proof?”
He speaks so lowly, his fingers press into the flesh of your arms portentously, and you think maybe you’ve poked the bear one too many times. But you won’t back down now—not when you think you might actually get what you want. 
So you look up at him and nod, throat too dry to speak. His eyes are deceptively soft, but you don’t miss the big bad something lurking just beneath the surface of the placid hazel. 
“And how do you think I should prove it?”
“I told you what I want,” you whisper, speaking above your pounding heart. 
“Not tonight, honey. Choose something else.”
“Well—that’s not fair,” you stammer, “the whole point is for you to want to have sex with me.”
Spencer smiles a little, tucking hair behind your ear. “I do want that. I promise you I do. But there are other things I want us to do first.”
“Then I want to do that, too! I just—I don’t know what I’m doing, and you do, and I’m already out on a limb by asking for this much. I know this is what I want but I need you to take the lead here. I trust you, Spencer.” You top off the monologue with an imploring gaze—hoping it delivers even a fraction of the impact that his puppy-dog eyes always have on you. 
He seems to study every square inch of your face as you wait in suspense for him to say something. At long last, his lips part—to no avail for several more seconds as he regards you. 
When the words finally do come, they’re an immense relief of pressure. 
“You’re going to promise me that you’ll communicate honestly. That means telling me if we need to slow down or stop, or if you don’t like something—”
“I promise,” you say, perhaps over-eagerly, offering him your extended little finger. 
An incredulous smile narrows his eyes. 
“Is this a pinky-promise?”
“It is.” You wiggle the finger in emphasis, and he shakes his head, smiling wider as you link pinkies. 
“I left you with Garcia for far too long.”
You shush him, disentangling your hands to cup his jaw and press your lips to his. It’s sweet and smiley until it isn’t—until everything slows down like sticky molasses and his hand is ghosting over your cheek, your neck, the curve of your waist, finally substantiating itself on your hip—the other encouraging you to tilt your head back as he deepens the kiss and you feel yourself melting under the heat of his touch. 
The pressure of his body against yours builds until you’re forced to take a step back, and then another, and another. Without question you allow yourself to be herded toward the bedroom, walked slowly backward as he keeps kissing you and blindly trusting he’ll make sure you don’t run in to anything. The bedroom door clicks shut behind him, and it is in all practicality a pointless gesture—but you find it incredibly comforting nonetheless.  
It’s too warm beneath your sweater and his hands are cool as they slip under the hem, sliding against the curve of your hip. Spencer’s never seen you without a shirt, you realize, as he pulls away from the kiss by only centimeters.  
“Off?” he mutters, thumbing at the knit fabric. And while you’re far from confident, you’ve certainly been making progress in this area. You help him tug it over your head without a word, noting a distinct and surprising lack of terror within yourself as you watch for his reaction to you. Hands glide slowly up your waist and you find yourself enchanted by the slight furrow of his brow, the parting of his lips. He traces down the lacy edge of your bra, skimming sensitive skin as he goes. 
“Pretty,” he murmurs. “You’re… so pretty.”
It seems you’ve rendered him uncharacteristically prosaic. The reaction might be underwhelming if it were anyone else—but Spencer Reid is a man who probably knows every synonym for pretty in the English language. Looking at you, he can’t think of a single one. In an odd way, it’s the highest compliment he could pay you. Your cheeks heat and your stomach flips as he drags a knuckle up the center of the cup, and you can feel it through the layers of lace and fabric. He leans forward, ghosting his lips over yours and continuing to run his fingers over the sensitive spot. “Do you know how pretty you are?”
This is one argument you will not be winning—one he’ll keep bringing up at the most inopportune times until he gets his way. 
“Spencer…”
“Don’t Spencer me. I’m asking you a question.”
The words don’t seem nearly as harsh as they really are when they’re delivered velvet-soft, with his lips and hands on you—when he’s so deftly popping the button on your jeans and dragging the zipper down with all the quickness of a slight-of-hand. It makes it hard to focus, even harder to speak. 
“We have… we have differing views on this matter.”
Generous handfuls of your hips and ass are taken as he helps you tug down your jeans before you kick them off, now left just in your underwear. 
“I thought I argued my point fairly well last time you were here. You didn’t learn anything from that?”
“Mm… maybe you just need to remind me.”
“Oh, I think I have to,” he agrees through a smile you can only hear. Gentle fingers skim up your back and tap the clasp of your bra. “How about this? Can we take this off?”
Any confidence from earlier crumbles and you loose a nervous hum—which is not the enthusiastic yes you’re sure Spencer will be seeking all evening. He pulls away, features etched with the beginnings of concern and a searching gaze. Asking would be unnecessary; the words simply come tumbling out of you. 
“What if you don’t like how I look?”
Spencer doesn’t even blink.
“That’s not going to happen.”
How you wish you could have the same assuredness in yourself that he seems to. 
“But what if… what if you’ve been with other girls who are more, like—I don’t know, just—better? Prettier?”
“Honey, you’re—” a sigh, a pause as he searches for the words—his eyes dart up and down your form, assessing, and when he looks back up at you, they’ve cleared and softened. He pulls you a little closer, rubbing circles into your back with his thumb. “I’m not thinking about anyone else right now. I’m not interested in anyone else right now. I already think you’re perfect, and I’m going to keep thinking that regardless of how you look. When I look at you, I’m not looking for things to critique. Do you understand me?”
As far as sentiments go, it’s a nice one. But the pressure of being seen still feels like an impossible burden. You whine, leaning your head against Spencer’s chest. He accepts your weight and runs his hand over your back as you look up at him. 
“But what if I’m hideously deformed?”
His eyebrows raise. 
“You’re not.”
“But what if I am?”
“Okay. It seems like you don’t feel ready yet, which is completely fine, we just won’t—”
“No!” you protest. “I am ready. I am. But… you have to promise to be nice to me no matter what. Or break up with me if you don’t like what you see so I don't have to wonder.”
“You’re ridiculous,” he says, kissing you, “and the only thing I’m willing to promise is that I’ll think you’re perfect. Me being nice will come as a natural byproduct of that which is very different than being nice by artifice. Take it or leave it.”
A moment of hesitance—but it’s short-lived. This is more important than your insecurities. Spencer is more important. 
“Take it,” you mumble against his lips. His fingers trace up the smooth skin of your back, all the way to the fabric and metal hooks on your bra. 
“Thank you.”
You wouldn’t have thought Spencer’s genius would manifest in being really good at undoing the clasp of a bra, but you can truly say you’re impressed by the ease with which he does it. It falls to the floor, leaving you completely shirtless for the first time in front of him. 
“Well?” you murmur, arms crossed defensively underneath your chest, because you understand overtop would sort of ruin the whole thing. “What’s the verdict?”
“You,” Spencer manages after a moment—you literally watch him memorizing every square inch of your body— “are ridiculously beautiful.”
The way his voice gets quieter makes your stomach flip. It sounds genuine. Too genuine to be faked. 
“So… no breakup?”
It seems that the more vulnerable you feel, the less likely you are to take a compliment. Spencer, who is always seeking patterns, probably recognizes this one, and doesn’t push you so hard this time. After a silent moment, he sighs and cradles your face in his hands. 
“You’re gorgeous. I hate how incapable you are of seeing that. We’re going to talk about this.”
“Yeah, but not right now, right?” you murmur, standing up on your tiptoes to kiss him. 
“Not right now,” he agrees. 
His lips are so soft and gentle against your own it feels like love, it feels like being talked down from the ledge of your own insanity. Somehow the way he strokes your hip feels more nurturing than sexual. It’s like he has sex and chaste affection on tap, able to turn them on and off at will. You’re happy to drown in either. Ideally, both.
After a while, his hands begin roaming farther, become bolder in their excursions over your flesh. Up, down, over your waist and ribs. Clearly Spencer had been trying to ease you into it, but you still can’t hide your sharp inhalation when his thumbs graze the sensitive skin of your breasts. He pulls his lips from yours, hands splayed over your sides. 
“Sit down.”
It’s much too gentle to be a command, but you frown. 
“Without you?”
“I’m not going anywhere,” he chuckles, lightly squeezing your waist. “Just sit. Utilize patience.”
You sit on the edge of the bed with an atypical reticence—you’re just a little too nervous for a snippy comeback. Spencer picks up on this, features softening sympathetically as he undoes his tie with nimble fingers. It lands somewhere on the bed and he leans over you, resting his weight on his fists and offering you a quick kiss. His voice is soft and designed to soothe as he speaks, mere inches away from your face, and so quiet it could only be heard at this range. 
“Are you nervous?” Cloth from the duvet pinches between your fingers. For a moment you don’t reply, dropping your head to watch when Spencer runs his hand over your thigh. “It’s okay if you’re feeling anxious, baby. We don’t have to do anything tonight.”
You expel a frustrated huff. 
“I want to. Just because I’m nervous doesn’t mean I don’t want this. I can handle a little bit of anxiety.”
He hums, dropping to a crouch and inserting himself directly in your line of sight. 
“I know you can. But you don’t always have to push yourself so hard.”
“I’m fine pushing myself a little. I pinky-promised I would tell you if I wanted to stop, remember?”
“Oh, how could I forget a pinky-promise?” he smiles. 
How could you forget anything, you think, becoming flushed and silently insolent at his dulcet teasing. 
“Please, do something.” It’s a whisper, brushing his lips as you lean down until you’re nose to nose. His hands are on the back of your legs. 
“I’m working on it.”
“It doesn’t look like it.”
“You’re smart, angel. Tell me why I've got you naked on my bed and I’m kneeling in front of you. Where could I possibly be taking this?”
Oh, you have a pretty strong inkling—but you’re scared to voice it and be wrong. Instead of risking it you shake your head slowly, shyly. What you’re not expecting is for Spencer to duck his head down, slide his hands up the side of your thighs and press kisses to the delicate skin there. It feels good—better than you’d have thought. 
“You don’t know?” he asks, looking up at you through burnished gold-rimmed pupils. “No guesses?”
“No guesses,” you agree breathlessly, hotter than you were when you had your clothes on and all the energy in your body condensed into one point between your legs. Spencer hums like he’s considering your answer, smoothing his thumbs over the soft skin of your thighs so gently it feels like burning. 
“I don’t think you’re being entirely truthful. Lie back, sweetheart.”
You do as you’re told, scooting up on the mattress and falling back on your elbows. Spencer wastes no time in climbing over you, leaving you in much the same position as the last time you’d been in his bed. The sheets feel cool against your bare skin, but he is exceptionally warm and solid over you. 
“I’m being honest.” Lie. “I don’t know what you’re going to do.”
Lips find the most sensitive spot of your neck, dancing over it torturously. The front of his shirt brushes your chest. Your thighs clamp together. 
“I don't like being lied to. Just say it, baby. I know you know.”
“Spencer,” you whine, fists bunching the excess fabric around his waist. Warm breath condensates on the skin of your neck as he chuckles. 
“You don’t like being teased, huh?”
“Please, Spence,” you whisper. You notice the pattern of his breathing pause momentarily before it all comes rushing out at once—and you catalogue that particular plea for later usage. 
“I can’t say no when you ask me like that.”
You push your fingers into his soft hair. 
“I know.”
It was a lucky guess. 
He’s still for a moment, relishing the feeling of your hands in his hair, before darting up to kiss you. 
“I’m going to use my mouth this time,” he murmurs against your lips. Though you knew that was what he intended, your heart stumbles in its perpetual march. “Is that okay?”
“What if I…”
You trail off. This is a very intimate situation which you’re not quite sure you have delicate enough language for. Or maybe you’re just stalling. Either way, Spencer is eternally patient with you. 
“You need to stop worrying so much, pretty girl. I’d love to do this for you. But it’s your call.”
“Love is a pretty strong word.”
“Sometimes I think not strong enough.”
The way he’s looking down at you so tenderly, brushing hair from your face, makes you think maybe he’s not just talking about how much he would love to go down on you. Regardless, it fortifies your trust in him. Spencer is the kindest person you know. He’s so clearly an enthusiastic giver. Why not allow him to give you this? 
“Okay,” you breathe. “You can—yeah.”
As usual, you’re impressively awkward, but he doesn’t seem to mind. In fact, you think he not-so-secretly delights in being the one to fluster instead of the other way around. Rarely has he mentioned his past romantic and sexual exploits, but gathering bits and pieces, you assume he was a fairly late bloomer. He probably knows what it’s like to be nervous and so deeply unsure of yourself. 
“Do you remember what you promised me?” he whispers, pressing butterfly-light kisses to your jaw. Your eyes flutter shut as his lips traverse down your neck, teeth skimming over the delicate skin while your breath catches. 
“Mhm.”
“You’re not gonna break that promise, are you?”
His voice, soft and muffled by your skin, is the most exhilarating and disorienting high. Your entire body buzzes with anticipation, satisfied only where his lips soothe and his body presses against yours. It takes a moment for you to remember to reply. 
“No.”
Reward comes in the form of his thumb brushing over the peak of your breast at the same time as he murmurs, “good girl.”
Your stomach flips at the endearment—you squeak and arch into him slightly. Spencer’s hand slides down your ribs as he chuckles, lips pressed just above your collarbone. 
“You’ve never called me that before,” you shudder as he continues kissing over your neck. 
“It’s not appropriate in most conversational contexts. But I can tell you’ve always been good.”
“Really? How?”
Spencer pauses, pushing himself up to regard you with searching eyes. The places he’d kissed feel cold without him. 
“I just can. You’re thinking too much, baby. I need your focus on me.”
“It is on you,” you huff. 
You watch his expression shift minutely. He loves games. Of course he’d love playing with you. That knowledge is why you’re only partially surprised when his thumb catches on your nipple again. 
“Is it? You’re only thinking about how it feels when I touch you here?”
A stammering nod. 
He toys with the sensitive flesh only a second more, amusement lighting his eyes, before dragging his hand down, down, down until it’s between your legs. Fingers trail over your clothed core, skimming the most sensitive part of you while your breath hitches.  
“Tell me how it feels when I touch you here.”
“Really good,” you admit, a heavy exhale escaping parted lips as he pins you with his gaze. 
“Really good, right. I can make it feel even better. Do you want me to make it feel better?”
Your thighs drop fully open and he adds just a bit more pressure until you’re pushing against his hand in search of more friction. 
“Yes please.”
“Then no more questions. I need you to trust me.”
Your answer is a breathy, dreamy sigh—you’d do anything, say anything for him. 
“Okay.”
Spencer kisses you, absorbing your noises of protest as his hand ceases between your legs and settles on your hip. But you’re trusting him. No whiny complaining. No unnecessary questions. 
Things go much quicker once you’re not interrupting him every twenty seconds to say something. His lips reattach to your neck, retracing their path (albeit quicker) until he’s below your collarbone. You watch in rapt fascination, twisted brows and parted lips as he peppers kisses down over your breast before dragging his tongue over your nipple. A jolted little moan spills out because you hadn’t been prepared to hold one in. Waves of hair fall over Spencer’s face, obscuring him from your vision, but you don’t think to push it away—your body is too busy processing the sensation to be much use on any other front. He darts his tongue over the peaked flesh, eliciting more little open-mouthed exhalations of pleasure from you. Earlier you hadn’t really thought it necessary for your bra to come off—you had no idea this could actually feel so good. A moment later he begins toying with the other nipple and you gasp as a bolt of heat goes straight to your core. 
You curse, further words catching in your throat as he suddenly switches, mouthing at your other breast and letting the cold air chill the other until you have goosebumps. It feels a little like hypnosis—you’re unable to move or speak as his tongue laves over you. Soon he’s replacing his mouth with a thumb again, sucking a mark onto your tit just above your nipple. You whimper a little at the pleasant brutality of it, hoping as he releases that it won’t soon fade. Spencer swipes over the stinging skin and presses a tender kiss to it, almost like an apology—but you sincerely doubt he’s actually sorry. 
Then he resumes his descent, leaving soft kisses down between your breasts, over your ribcage and stomach—when he reaches your hips, he doesn’t pull off your underwear all at once. Rather, he slides the fabric down centimeter by centimeter, kissing the revealed skin like it’s precious. 
This time you don’t need to be told to lift your hips. He helps you slip the final piece of clothing down and off of your legs, flinging it somewhere blindly before getting comfortable between your thighs once more. Your heart pounds with arousal and anxiety as his arms wrap around your thighs and his hands rub up and down the tops of them slowly. 
“God, you’re fucking beautiful,” he mumbles, loosening his hold on one leg to thumb at your folds. They glisten in the dim light of his bedroom as he gently reveals your clit. A soft whine escapes you when he nudges at the aching bud, slipping over it a few times and alleviating a bit of the pressure that’s been building. “Shh, baby. I know. I’m gonna take care of it. You’re being so good for me.”
Fuck. The way he talks to you makes your brain turn to mush—you’re utterly incapable of forming an intelligent thought. Spencer has rendered you a complete idiot, and you’re not upset about it in the slightest. 
He presses more gentle kisses to the creases between your thighs, just above your clit—everywhere except for where you need him most. Everything aches for him in the best way and at least you’re too turned on to be very insecure anymore. All you want is relief. But you’re trusting him. 
Thankfully, he delivers. 
The tip of his tongue grazes so lightly over your clit that if you weren’t this worked up you may not have felt it at all. In your current state, however, the stimulation echoes through every atom of your being. Every muscle is tense, frozen in place—you can’t even breathe for a second. He does it again, a little flatter, with a little more pressure, and you whimper. It’s a delicate thing, almost pained and definitely overwhelmed as he gently begins working his tongue against you. Your head cranes up to watch, your jaw drops. Approximations of curse words try to form, but come out only as, “f-fu—oh,” so whiny and soft it doesn’t even sound like you. He hums sympathetically, but you suspect it morphs into a chuckle as you continue to gasp and mewl. 
There are times where you can hold back sounds of pleasure. When you’re by yourself, it’s typically not a problem. Two weeks ago when Spencer was knuckle deep in you for the first time, it had certainly been a challenge, and you’d pretty much given up. But this—this is something else entirely. It feels like religion. It feels like compulsion. Even if you had the slightest modicum of control over yourself, which you currently don’t, you wouldn’t want to keep quiet. You want him to know what he’s doing to you. 
So you let every cry, every whine and whimper drag from your lungs, unbidden and unshaped. You’re new at this, after all—every broad lick feels so good that you have no fucking idea what do to with your hands or how to stop rolling your hips or how to censor your sounds. 
“Spencer,” you keen in one of the moments you remember to breathe. He moans against you, taking you into his mouth and sucking lightly. Your hips buck. “Oh, my—fuck!”
The hand that’s still around your thigh rubs soothing lines up and down. The one that’s spreading you open pulls your folds apart a little bit further, granting him more access to your clit. He flicks his tongue and you almost come then and there, vision going gray for a split second. 
“Wait, wait, Spence—“ you squeak, writhing and trying not to squeeze your thighs together for fear of hurting him. He pulls back and looks up at you, lips shining with your slick and eyes glazed with lust. Fuckfuckfuck he looks so fucking good. “Please, just… slow down, or I’m gonna… or it’s gonna be over.”
The corner of his mouth twitches as he rubs circles into your inner thigh. 
“It’s over when you say it’s over. You don’t have a refractory period. We don’t have to stop at one.”
“Oh—you don’t—you don’t have to do that,” you stammer. 
“I know I don’t have to. But if you want me to, I want to. You taste so good, angel girl.”
Well, shit. 
He looks absurdly sexy between your legs like this. You have no idea how you got so lucky, but you don’t plan on taking it for granted. Your fingers tangle in his hair. 
“I don’t know if I can do more than one,” you admit shyly, slightly embarrassed by how little you know about yourself and in general compared to Spencer. Hazel eyes sparkle in the warm light. 
“How about we start with one and see how it feels?”
Your voice is breathy when you respond, “okay,” already impatient for him to get back to it. Spencer seems just as eager, immediately kissing between your legs with a passion that makes your lips jealous. 
The flat of his tongue presses circles against you and your hips buck, already ramping up to that point you’d been at before calling a time-out. Slowly his fingers find their way to your entrance and he teases you with them, dipping in to the first knuckle before withdrawing again. If you could form words, you’d beg him to just do it already, but all you can manage is an affronted whine as you tilt your hips down, hoping he catches the meaning. 
Of course he does—pushing two fingers inside you at once. The intrusive stretch adds a sharp edge to the pleasure, makes it more interesting, as your brain short-circuits and you choke out a moan. It only takes a few slow pumps of his fingers in tandem with the pressure of his tongue until your hips are writhing and you’re and mewling desperately, more overwhelmed with pleasure than you’ve ever been. You push his hair back, able to see him for the first time, and fully appreciate the hollow of his cheeks, the way he looks up at you with perfect, glassy half-lidded eyes, the rhythm of his hand and tongue—he takes your clit between his lips once more, sucking lightly, and you’re done for. A pornographic sob escapes from deep within you as you come, but he doesn’t stop. The orgasm lasts longer than you knew one could—although, it’s only your second time, so you don’t exactly have a lot of data to go off of. Your entire body feels warm and floaty, and what he’s doing feels so good you want him even deeper—but you know he won’t give you that yet. Instead you focus on the slow burn of your orgasm, allowing him to carry on for a while until you begin slowly drifting back to earth and it becomes a bit too much. He recognizes the barely-there whine for what it is and pulls his fingers from you carefully, pressing one final kiss to your clit that makes your legs twitch and summons a weak little moan. 
Spencer’s lips find other avenues, over the delicate skin of your thighs and hips and stomach as he slowly drags himself up again. By the time you’re face to face again you’re still breathing hard. You sort of feel like prey underneath his weight, studied so scrupulously, known far more intimately by him than anyone has ever known you before. But there is so much light and kindness in the way he looks at you that you almost can’t make sense of it. 
Maybe it’s possible to be known and still wanted. The possibility spins like a coin on its edge in your mind. An idea you spent so much time trying to nurture and is only just now beginning to sprout. Maybe someone could see you at your most vulnerable, and still find you worthy of kindness. Appreciation. Affection. 
Spencer certainly could, it seems, as he ducks down to kiss you. You dodge it, turning your head demurely. He nudges his head against yours, speaking so, so softly, utterly cloying as he teases, “what? You’re not gonna kiss me now? Is that how it is?”
“No!” you balk, equally as quiet and especially bashful. “Not when you… no.”
“Let me kiss you,” he pleads, so earnestly you turn your head back to face him. His big eyes are hazy, reflecting all the warmth and dizziness you feel. “Let me kiss you. Please.”
You whine.
“I don’t wanna… taste… myself.”
Spencer doesn’t miss a beat. 
“Hm. We’ll need to work on that. Because one day, I’ll make you come just like that again, and then I’m going to fuck you, and you’re really going to want me to kiss you then, angel.”
Something flickers in your core. 
Suddenly you’re not so squeamish. You really want him to kiss you now. But it seems he’s going to have his fun, first. 
“Open.” Without even thinking about it, your lips part. He really ought to be careful with what he tells you to do—you’re all too compliant. Even as his fingers slip between your lips, you’re obediently hollowing your cheeks around them, watching him with big eyes as his own mouth falls slightly open. “Oh, baby,” he croons. “What are we gonna do with you?”
That flicker has returned to a full-fledged throbbing once you open your mouth again, slightly dizzy from lack of oxygen. 
“Can you make me come again right now?” you whisper, grasping lightly at his shirt. He grins like he loves the idea—and you let him have his way, accepting his lips on yours with no complaint. After a few moments, (the taste is surprisingly unobtrusive), he pulls away.
“I would love to.”
-
part three
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socialkid · 6 months ago
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Imagine…
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You’re a well known actress, and your name is pretty big. Like Zendaya big. And your fiancé Katsuki Bakugou is your pro hero boyfriend. Perfect couple right? No literally you are. He goes with you to all your interviews, tapes all of your auditions, and manages to get on your set AT LEAST one time.
Well recently you got casted in a show about an zombie outbreak. You play a main yet supporting character named Halle, a 19 year old girl who is apparently the only survivor left of her family.
Lucky for you the producer highly respects your boyfriend, and he’s allowed to watch you on set whenever. He sits in a chair the directors provide for him every time you film.
He usually supports you and he’ll peak at you from his phone a couple times, but it’s nothing he’s never not seen before.
Now when Bakugou’s passing by his staff’s cubicles and work area in his angency, and he keeps hearing them discuss about ‘Dead of Night’ (your new show) he’s genuinely intrigued.
Apparently the show’s gon viral. And everyone is talking about it. “Yeah, you haven’t seen it yet? I swear you live under a rock.” pro hero Charge Bolt told him. I mean technically he has watched it, he watched you film it! But now that he realizes, he can’t even spell out the plot.
So one day when Bakugou finds the time, he plops down on your sofa and clicks on your series.
Safe to say he might be intrigued…
Now when he watches he’s locked in. Snacks and all, and if he blinks he’s rewinding. It’s all he watches, he’s so interested in the show and can be considered a piece of the show’s fandom.
Now when you’re filming the show, Katsuki shows up a whole lot less. When the directors yell cut and your eyes pan to his empty chair. Katsuki gives you every excuse under the sun as to why he didn’t show up a certain day. You figured maybe he just got bored watching you film and didn’t know how to tell you, so you shrugged it off. You had no clue he was heavily avoiding spoilers. You didn’t even know he watched your show.
So a couple years pass and your show gets renewed for it’s third season. Unfortunately this season, Halle meets her fate. You recorded your last scene for the show, episode 10. Not a dry eye from the media.
The day your character’s death airs is a tragic day for your fans. Especially Bakugou. Mid way through the show as he slurps his spicy ramen his jaw is floored when your character passes. Noodles immediately discarded back into the cup.
So when you get back home and your boyfriend is quietly laying down on the sofa, watching a corny kids cartoon, you’re lost. “Hey Kats.” You say hanging your coat on the rack as you entered. He only replied with a mumble, something along the lines of “hey how was filmineejdirk”. The room was dim, the shades were drawn, and your boyfriend showed no signs of getting up. Was he depressed or something?
You quietly sat down next to him, glancing at the colorful show in front of him. “Katssss…what’s wrong?” You finally asked. No response. Then he slowly shifted upwards, now sitting up to face you. “Halle died.” He responded. He actually looked fustrated.
You were actually shook, you weren’t even aware that your boyfriend was one of the shows viewers. It sort of made up for him not being at your interviews and filming days.
“I’m sorry baby, but I mean I’m still here.” You said, now opening your arms out to embrace him. He took the opportunity, and pulled you into his arms, leaning back onto the sofa once again.
“I know,” he muttered into your neck, tickling your skin, “Yer not Halle though.”
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onlyyourhallucination · 18 days ago
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Lap Rights
Pairing : Dan Heng x Reader
Fluff ; Slight Crack ; The use of chinese endearment once ; Established Relationship
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Now, how did it end up like this again?
Him covering half of his face with his hand as he tried to process what's happening, and that is feeling your weight pressing down on his thighs when he's just lounging around in the party car, minding his own business.
Let's rewind back to a few minutes ago, right before you approach him.
You were doing your own thing, busying yourself, or at least you tried to, until boredom downs upon you and you decided to see if there's anything you can do. And then there you saw Dan heng, on the couch, seemingly busy with something. Is he filling up the datas for the databank? You wonder.
At first you didn't want to bother the man, but somehow your brain just goes, how about you sit on his lap without any context? Tempted. You finally relent to your intrusive thought and walk up to him, he seemed to notice you approaching, he look up at you for a moment and nods before looking back to the datas again.
You huffed softly and then move his hand to make an entry way for you to slide yourself onto his lap.
And so this happened now.
Him blinking confusedly at this sudden action from you, as his cheeks slowly going redder each second that pass. "Wh.. What are you doing?" He sounded so, flustered as he shot the question to you, unable to decipher what's happening as he felt your weight on his lap. "Sitting." You casually replied, and it did not help his case at all. "There are many empty seats." He retorted gently as he glance around to make sure nobody is looking, after all he rather do things like, this, in private.
"I know," "Then why—" "Can't I have my lap rights?" You got him baffled, his lips parted slightly, he wanted to say something but the words died down at the tip of his tongue. He frowned for a moment before sighing in defeat, and finally relents. Putting away his tablet and then placing his hands on your thighs, going up to your hips then waist. "Is something wrong, tiánxīn?" He whispered softly, one of his hand then reaches up to you, brushing your hair away to see your face. "Nothing, I'm just, .. bored." Dan heng blinked, before he shook his head in amusement. "And then you decided to do, this. Because you're bored?" He said as he rub his thumb on your waist line, you simply smiled cheekily at his words.
"I mean why not," Dan heng's eyes flickered down to your lips, "I see." He mumbled, his hand that previously brushing your hair now slowly going down to your cheek, his thumb grazing along your lower lip. You know him well, this means he wants to kiss you, but he's way too shy to ask for it directly, by aeons, in public too? He rather not.
"Shall we move?" You whispered knowingly, his eyes flickering up to your hues, he took a deep breath and then before you could say anything more you felt something slithering around your waist. You look down and it's Dan heng's tail—
"Sorry, I ..think, I might need your help." He whispered an apology and his hand that's on your waist now properly wrapped around your waist before he slide out from the couch, with you in his arms, and his tail wrapped around your waist. He walked all the way back to the passenger cabin, luckily no one was out from their room to see what's happening.
As soon as you two enter the archives, you should pray this man doesn't go overboard because everyone will definitely have a hard time to rest with the sound of your moans.
Whoops.
©onlyyourhallucination . 2025 || Do not copy/translate/use for ai
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A/n — I miss danheng. fuck. Despite already seeing him in Amphoreus quest, I still miss him. 🥺..
Also, I apologize in advance if the chinese writing is wrong, I simply copy paste it from google (⁠ ⁠;⁠∀⁠;⁠)
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phant0mth1ef · 7 months ago
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i kissed the scars on her skin, i still think you’re beautiful.
-
can be read as part 3 to this boy’s too young to be singing the blues, or as a standalone :3!
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empty. your hospital room was empty. void of all life. the sheets were as if nobody had slept there in years, the window shades were put back to their normal, idle position, and all the decorations that class a had put up for you were now gone.
but he was still directed to the room where you were supposed to reside. he stood at the doorway, his jaw open as he stared inside, trying to look for any signs of life. because why else would they send him here if you weren’t there? you were still alive. right?
he was worried, to say the least, until he heard quiet muffled sounds coming from behind him, you were standing, your iv was right next to you as you looked up at the boy with half-lidded eyes.
“hi katsuki.” you yawned.
“you spent all that time asleep and you’re still tired?!” there was the snarkiness and attitude you knew and loved.
“exhausted really. come in.” you motioned for the boy to follow you as you made your way to your bed, sitting down and patting the space next to you.
“why’s it look like a grey’s anatomy scene in here?” he was always so blunt, even if you were currently in the worst shape possible.
“didn’t wanna get too comfortable. i don’t plan on living in here any longer than i have to.” something was off. you didn’t have that stupid happy go lucky smile on your face.
“my quirk. they took my quirk.” you looked down as the tears welled in your eyes, trying to smile but it was quickly broken.
you never knew what to do with your hands, so you just played with your fingers whenever you were scared.
“that’s what you’re so upset about?! you almost died.” even when you’re feeling down he still manages to scold you.
“i know but,” you sniffled.
“i just-. i really wanted to become a hero with you katsuki.” the boy was never one for emotions, choosing to hide them rather than showcase them.
but in that moment, he slowly felt his hard exterior crumbling as he swore his heart begun to break, you had meant every word you said to him, your tears were real tears.
“tch. you’re real dense, ya know that?! you’re already a hero dumbass. you fought in that stupid war. you earned the right to be called a hero.” he looked away from you, not meeting your eyes because he refused to let you know he was crying.
until you heard him sniffle, and you pretended not to laugh even though your own eyes were filled to the brim with tears.
“you cryin’ katsuki?” a laugh had slipped out as he angrily snapped his head back to face you.
“hah?! no! it’s just stuffy in here.” it was hard to watch him pretending to be tough while he had a tear falling from his eye.
“s’okay to cry, y’know.” you leaned your head on his shoulder, and he turned at your sudden action.
then proceeded to put his head on your head, making mitsuki nearly jump at her son’s sudden actions, and yet she was quick enough to grab her camera, quickly snapping a photo.
the same photo that bakugou had looked back on after eri had successfully rewinded your body to the time when your quirk was still a part of you.
the same photo that was on display at your wedding, along with about a gazillion childhood pictures of you both, you both had been in the background of many pictures despite never knowing each other, it was as if an invisible string had tied your souls together.
and sure enough, the photo was hung in your shared home, along with another picture of you both as pro heroes, your children walking by it every day on their way to school.
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angelesca · 3 days ago
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w.c. ~5k hooooly balllls | game system au! phainon x npc!gnreader, short stories, in da clerb, we all fam with the amphoreus cast, puppy phainon yippee, bantering with the game system, trying to avoid raising phainon's affection points but failing horribly💖reader has a lil' nickname ('moonlight'), goofy antics ofc ofc, finally some physical contact (it's a good day), written during ver.3.0! (forgive me for any poor characterisations!) [𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐯𝐨𝐥𝐮𝐦𝐞𝐬]: 1 ┃ 2 ┃...
a/n: here i am again with another stupid idea (who is surprised). okay but the nymph emoticons lit a lightbulb in my head and BAM i gave birth a second child. drew inspo from [svsss], [orv], and [villains are destined to die]!
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!!! disclaimer (read me) !!! in the game, there's no night in okhema city (as of writing this), but in this fic it happens! it's explained as best as my dumb brain could^^
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“what… the… fudge.” you stare at the system pop-up, almost drooling from how long you’ve had your mouth open in disbelief.
marmoreal market. amphoreus’s civilians walk by you as if you are a passing breeze. in their sphere of natural time flowing, you are stuck with defective clockwork, unmoving in the present reality. what was once a screen of predictable code on your gaming device, is now alive. 
this must be a dream, an illusion drifting by in your head. it's that damn phone, isn't it? you need to stop staying up all night reading fanfic.
you shut your eyes.
… ping!
…?
groggily, you open your eyes. in front of you is the perpetrator:
[ヽ(o^▽^o) hi~]
angrily, you press the ‘x’ button and close it.
[ what's that for?! (ノಥ益ಥ)ノ ]
you mash your finger on the blue window repeatedly, poking the emoticon in the eye. “you did this to me, didn't you? you kidnapper!” your voice is brimming with fear, overflowing with confusion.
[ WHAAAAT?! (凸ಠ益ಠ)凸 just hear me out- ow! i’ll help you! and stop poking my eye already! yeowch! my nostril! ☆(#××) ]
pausing, you take a deep breath. the gazes of alert onlookers are beginning to settle goosebumps on your skin. there’s not much that can be done for now, honestly, your best bet is to place some faith on this mysterious system. “... what do you want with me?” you whisper in the lowest volume your anger would allow.
[ hehe~ (o´▽`o) ] you don’t like that expression at all. [ it’s exactly as i’ve told you from the start: become the main character of the newest update in honkai star rail, amphoreus! ] (this is not an advertisement)
“nah.” unamused, you walk through the window which shatters dramatically.
[ (°ロ°) hah? ] 
you scoff. the troublesome titankin? unending side quests and puzzles? responsibilities? fighting a literal god? who the hell wants to do all that? clenching your fist, resolve reconstructs your confidence. and you definitely don't want to listen to an annoying emoticon who forced you here. “i… will live quietly as an npc!” don't let the system have their way!
[ HAAAaAH???! Σ(゚口゚;) ]
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you find your 88th chest of the day. it's pretty much stealing yet no one bats an eye, do amphoreus civilians also happen to offer customary welcomes for robbers in their houses? at least you are adapting to the world quickly given your game knowledge.
[ surprised you haven't encountered any enemies this past month. usually, the mc has to do some fighting... ┐( ̄ヘ ̄;)┌ ] is what the system said. guess the npc life was made for you.
when you open your 88th chest, you immediately regret it. a purple void cleaves the air and a familiar character dives out. it emotes cheekily, swooping the chest like an eagle to prey. “teehee~ this is mine now!”
[ that’s bartholos the spirit thief. ( ° ∀ ° )ノ゙] [ new achievement: 'meeting bartholos!' ]
bartholos, spirit thief. distasteful memories rewind their tape in your head. the anger you felt seeing this thief pop up, doing the tedious minigame... fury untethered, its primordial tides stirs the previously calm waters of your mind. [ -75 sanity... ]
“... you lil’ flappin’ shirthead. i will rip your throa buy you a lovely necklace and stew you cook you my favourite stew!” 
[ bartholos is confused! ]
“you fu***** bi** sh****** p******* **@^*)>{“£$^*!!!!!” [ OMG! the system can’t keep up with the filtering! o(><;)○ ] “*****pots clanging*****cats meowing*****???***more farting***??”
[ shots fired! it's extremely effective! ]
“o-o-okay! geez, take it… ” bartholos drops the chest, hands in the air. “damn, is it that serious?”
[ w-what kind of npc are you? ( : ౦ ‸ ౦ : ) ]
"what do you mean?" you pant, "that was totally npc-like." rule #1 in 'the npc survival handbook': gotta make a living somehow.
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[ oh, there's an injured pers- don't just ignore them! (ᗒᗣᗕ)՞ ]
you had just passed by a dark alley, genuinely not having noticed someone laying there because of the night shadows. and not because you were stuffing your face with sagelore fruit. rolling your eyes, you say, "pay me (nom nom)."
[ huhu (μ_μ) you're so cruel... ]
you cock an eyebrow. "and who forced me here (muffle muffle)?"
[ new side quest: 'be a good person!' ] [ reward: 1500 credits ]
squinting, you read it over - the reward is quite hefty? rule #1 resounds in your head: 'gotta make a living somehow'. retracing your steps, you decide to investigate the shrouding darkness, fingers tracing along the walls.
[ take this! ψ( ` ∇ ´ )ψ ]
your foot catches onto a stray object. "huh?!" the ground slips beneath you and gravity is pulling you by the hand. fortunately, you land on top of something. a solid hand is placed on your lower back, having caught your fall.
analysing whatever it is, you recognise its familiarity: white hair, heroic armour, long cape... oh. oh. oh no. oh nonononono. [ oh yes (≖ ͜ʖ≖) ]
rule #2 in the 'npc survival handbook': do not get involved with the chrysos heirs. you gulp. "yo, i'm outta here-"
[ new mainline quest! complete the scenario to advance~ ]
"you littl-" [ violation of system rule #87: do not speak out of character ] "wha-"
[ please choose out of the following options]:
[ i love you! ]
[ let's arrange a marriage NEOW (charisma check) ]
[ if you and i were socks, we'd make a great pair! ]
your eyes could pop out of their socket. what is the system trying to do here? worst wingman in history! without meaning to, you choose the secret fourth option: silence. you awkwardly stare at each other. [ he is confused! ] [ hehe~ okay, i'll stop~ (o^ ^o) that was fun ]
"you shouldn't be here," a serrated voice, sawing into your ears, slices through the stiff silence.
[ 'ooc' turned on ] you feel your throat clear, recclaiming your words. "yes, i agree." you nod your head enthusiastically. "i should be home, cosy in bed." [ oh, come on (¬_¬) ]
"haven't you noticed it's night time?"
"uh," you crook your head up. "i did[n't]." now that he mentioned it, no one else was awake in ohkema city, as if in hiding.
"then please find somewhere safe," he pushes himself up with ripened strength. "it's dangerous to-" he winces. you back away, searching for the site of cause. blood is pooling on his abdomen.
you didn't expect him to be in such a state. how many enemies was he fighting off? glass fiddles in your pockets, reminding you of your spoils. hurriedly, you hand him a health potion that you definitely did not steal. then, painkillers, disinfectant, and so on.
he asks quizically, "how do you have so many things in your pockets?"
"don't worry about it." just videogame things innit. silently, you tend to his wounds though your effort is clumsy.
he looks up at you. his hand timidly ghosts along the road of your working arm, driving closer and closer, as if he's navigated it before. a familiarity that suggests crossed trajectories, but with the way you avoid his eyes, the paths quickly rupture back into parallel lines.
ping! [ new achievement: 'meeting phainon' ] [ phainon's affection +1! ]
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you had to repel phainon, but he's strongly magnitised. it's been a few days like this and you don't know why - it's not like you have dog food in your pockets.
"so, what do you do for a living?" oh no, he's is showing interest and his imaginary dog tail is wagging.
your mind blanks. it's not like you can tell him you steal chests and spit bars at bartholos. that'd be a prison speedrun. "i... i'm a professional npc..." [ great impression ( ̄_ ̄) ] you groan at the system message.
he tilts his head, curiousity shining in his eyes. "en... pee... sea?"
"uhhh," you falter. then, a lightbulb. wait, wouldn't this is be a good opportunity to change his impression of you—for the worse? anymore association with a chrysos heir is basically a life sentence to becoming the mc, right? "... i," you tinker with your head. "... i sniff armpits..." [ ... my ears hurt (¯ . ¯;) ]
phainon can only smile stiffly. "ahaha?" [ phainon is... intrigued? what's with this guy ] [ phainon's affection +1!(?) ]
... that did not work. rule #3 of 'the npc survival handbook': don't draw attention to yourself (failed).
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another day in your life...
"do you know about the other chrysos heirs?" phainon asks, carrying your haul of limited edition honeycakes. [ w(°o°)w finally, the plot is moving! ]
"no," you refuse adamantly, "and i don't want to know because it's too much exposition to listen with no skip butt-"
"hello..."
you jump. "wah?!" the girl bloomed by death's hand studies you, her dark circles accentuating her eyes.
a deep voice thrusts himself in. "are you phainon's new sparring partner? hmph."
"the new traveller? you must be the one the threads were whispering about... why don't we have a chat later?"
"we welcome you to ohkema! isn't it great?!"
"isn't it great...?"
"isn't it great? hmph."
[ isn't it great? \(^▽^)/]
why in kephale's name is every chrysos heir suddenly here? is this a family gathering or what? it's like you're meeting your in-laws, ready to get their blessings for phainon's hand in marriage.
[ your future husband ] phainon smiles warmly. "well, now you know them." [ handsome as always (^་།^) ] [ new achievement: 'meeting the family!' ]
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"do you want to embalm a corpse with me...?"
"are you really phainon's sparring partner? come, let me test your prowess in battle."
both of your sides are occupied. along with a tall puppy, there's also a purple butterfly and a tabby cat apparently [ ૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა ]. "don't you guys have to save the world?"
castorice nods slowly. "indeed... finding thanatos, i hope to recover my past too..."
mydei crosses his arms. "of course i want to defeat nikador and return to castrum kremnos one day. but who says heroes don't need rest?"
"and you both decided to spend it with me of all people?"
"phainon mentions you a lot... we simply wanted to see for ourselves," castorice replies, "should we invite tribbie too?"
"please don't," you shrug your shoulders. "i'm only an npc, nothing to see here." [ are you sure about that? 🤨 ] suddenly, emojis?
"en-piii-she...?" castorices points a finger to her lip.
"em... piss... cee? what's that?" mydei lifts an eyebrow.
you were not gonna answer that again. [ castorice's affection +1! ] [ mydei's affection +1! ]
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in the distance, threads begin to murmur a song. the dressmaster's fingers weave through her strings, strumming each one to orchestrate amphoreus’s future stage.
aglaea’s eyebrows dip. tribbie's ears opened at the first note, wary. "the threads are strained..."
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[ (@^◡^) ~ ] "phainon, dearie, how have you been?"
[ ヽ(・∀・)ノ ] "phainon, come look at the fresh fruit!"
phainon, is admittedly very popular, a stark contrast to you, like day and night. "how do you have so much energy to interact?" you question.
phainon is now petting a large dog, wearing a large grin when the dog licks his face. in your eyes, they are a pair of twins playing with each other. "i think it just comes naturally. it's a part of my duty to the citizens."
duty. the word is tiresome in your head. you crouch down, rubbing the large dog's fur. "then, is there anything you want to do for yourself?"
"oh..." he trails off, stealing a glance at you. the steady waves in phainon's eyes shine blue, finding your reflection in them on his horizon. "there are many things i'd love to do. you know, i'm jealous of you." [ (╬`益´) HE'S LYING-! ] you press the mute button.
"what do you mean?"
sunlight perches itself on top of his head, kissing the crown of his head like a tender mother to born babe. you feel your breath being stolen. he is surely nature's revered child. "i hope to be as free as you someday, doing whatever i want," he says (he doesn't know about the chest-stealing, does he?). a face steeled from suffering, regret, and past mistakes, smelts under your warm gaze. if you were to lift his lips up with your fingers, you would find it malleable without resistance. "away from all the chrysos heir business - it gets stressful at times."
your heart skips, understanding. beneath the exterior of a hero is someone who wants to live like every other ordinary person. your heart skips one more time, hearing how you could inspire a chase for freedom in him. [ your understanding of phainon has deepened ] an unsuspecting heat runs laps across your cheeks. you both wave goodbye to the dog. "so... you want to be an npc too?"
"n-p-c," phainon recounts, "an armpit sniffer?" he teases.
"nevermind." unconciously, you brush away the strands of hair obscuring phainon's eyes, taming his fur. his eyebrows lift, eyes radiant. ears redden. "ah..." a timid disappointment when you stop, fluffy ears drooping.
silently, you think the conversation over. duty... is that what creates purpose? should you find one too? does an npc need to think this extensively? perhaps this is a part of you speaking, begging to fit in with this foreign world.
freedom and obligation. can't both co-exist?
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one day, you're haggling at the market stalls, firing words no one could understand. [ phainon's affection +1! ]
another day, you're falling off the dromases every minute. phainon watched you get strapped to the saddle with rope when all else failed. [ phainon's affection +1! ]
today, you ate agalae's stock of afternoon tea desserts. [ phainon's affection +1 ]
and tomorrow, you'll ask castorice and mydei to fight to the death to settle the philosophical dilemma of the 'unstoppable force vs. immovable object'. you told him of your evil plans. [ phainon's affection +1 ]
"uh, can you stop doing that?" you turn towards the human-sized dog behind you. [ phainon's affection +1 ]
phainon stops in his tracks. "doing what?"
you point at him. [ phainon's affection +1 ] "... nevermind." you give up. it's a bit endearing, honestly. you've come to appreciate his presence accompanying you. a small smile plays on your lips. [ phainon's affection +10!!! ] ..?
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[ new mainline quest! 'chat with aglaea.' ]
that's was a great start to your morning; the deafening system alarm was a nice touch. you threw a fist at the pop-up, annoyed. [ this is abuse!! (ಥ﹏ಥ) ]
so now, you are in the bathhouse with aglaea [ and me! (*ˊᗜˋ*) ]. she slides a thick envelope across the table you were both sitting at.
hesitantly, you take it under her inspective gaze. apprehension takes root in your guts. you open the envelope. [ 7-7-7 TRILLION CREDITS??!! =͟͟͞͞(꒪ᗜ꒪‧̣̥̇) ] you look up at her, stunned. you only know how to mutter her name, "aglaea...?"
"i urge you to take it and travel far away," she explains, tapping the table with her finger. "the strife titan is closer than ever and amphoreus is losing itself to dark nights due to the black tide. yet, phainon is distracted at this crucial moment." the tapping stops. "and i suspect you are the cause of his straying mind."
you point at yourself, disbelieving [ (⊙_⊙) ☜ ? ]. "me?" you've seen this in dramas before - the part where the mother-in-law bribes her son's partner. you could almost laugh at the comparison. realistically, you would choose the money...
"-but that's not up to you," you frown, remembering yesterday. "phainon can choose what he wants to do."
you have come to understand each other, yes, the stars are re-writing your definitions - phainon, the great warrior who yearns for a quiet life, pledging to his one moon, and you, an outsider who went as they pleased yet also wanted to belong. if aglaea is to deny his longing desires, then it is to deny your existence.
"don't make me laugh," aglaea reprimands sternly. the threads in the air are tense, ready to cut. your throat cinches. "freedom is something we gave up long ago to devote ourselves to amphoreus's amity." a pained expression fades within a split second.
a heaviness spears into you, weighing you down. you look at your feet. she is right, but you can't help but feel pierced into. silence reigns the air.
ping! [ hey! (눈_눈) ] you look up. [ what are you doing right now? ]
...? [ you said you'd live freely! (albeit as an 'npc') why are you hesitating now? you're letting the system win! ]
"huh?" isn't that what the system wanted though? to have you obey the rules and the role of a typical mc. then again, when did you ever listen to it? "uh, well..."
aglaea stands up. "that's all i want to convey."
"wait," the words suddenly burst out, a wave of energy surging. [ go go! ] "... saving amphoreus, it's not only an obligation, but something all the chrysos heirs chose for themselves." [ ∑d(°∀°d) ] aglaea raises an eyebrow. she is letting you speak what could be your final words.
"... castorice wishes to recover her past. she will defeat thanatos and save amphoreus, to discover the world with newfound purpose."
"mydei hopes to return to castrum kremnos and sever the last ties. he will defeat nikador to protect amphoreus and his new life."
"and phainon has people he wants to protect. and to do that, he will save amphoreus to keep them safe."
"the chrysos heirs all share the same feelings as you, hearts strong; saving amphoreus, but to also save a future of their own as well. so... put more faith... in them..." the words die out when you realise that what you've been saying, to aglaea of all people. her stare is critical, analysing your flaws. "or don't..." well, it was a good life.
you are expecting the sweet release of death. but nothing comes. it is silent before aglaea sits back down, one leg crossing over the other. she rests her chin on her hand, looking into the distance. seemingly conflicted, as if not wanting you to look at her, but hoping you'd stay for a bit longer. the ice in the air warms bit-by-bit. you process the silent understanding with her, watching the water flow. [ aglaea's affection +1 ]
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"don't die guys. seriously." you give mydei a pat on the back, and castorice a thumb up because she'll instantly dissolve you otherwise. "where's phainon?"
"i saw him on the rooftop... i think he's wait... ing..." castorice trails off, head bobbing from a lack of sleep presumably.
mydei scratches his head. "we'll head off first then," he sighs. "don't keep him any longer than you have to."
"why am i-" the pair gradually get smaller into the distance. "-the one to go?" [ new mainline mi- ] "yeah, yeah, i get it." you wave the message away. [ 凸( ` ロ ´ )凸 ] you smile. [ YOU LAUGHED- ] muted.
sure enough, you find the missing person on a rooftop. phainon is surprised to see you. you wave, approaching him. "yo."
"... yo." he mirrors, brightening like the sun. but behind the smile were shadows.
"what's up?" you ask.
phainon is in quiet contemplation. "i'm afraid, honestly," he starts, "i do want to defeat nikador. it's been a life-long goal."
"but... i wish i could run away too, away from the commitment. rest my eyes and not have to think or worry."
insecure, anxious. you saw hints of it before, but now he has cracked completely, revealing to you. the calm before the storm. a final exchange of all the unwritten words.
you make an inch for his hand, but unsure, you retract it. "you sound as if you'll die."
his eyes widen. "i didn't mean to insinuate..." he looks down forlornly, at the distance between his and your hands. the quiver in his fingers craves, agitated. "i can't die yet, there's too much i want to do." his eyes move to yours. but the embarassment he feels when you reciprocate it quickly deflects his gaze away.
skin to bone; rust to metal. they only rot to the test of time, and it is only in this way that phainon will release himself from the overworld. not to the titankin, not to nikador, but a natural harbinger. that way, every breath, down to his last, can be spent on you.
you really want to pet his head. thinking back to the conversation with aglaea, you construct your words, "come home after this. to amphoreus, to the chrysos heirs. afterwards, there will be time for your heart to rest."
all these answers but phainon didn't find one to the question he is searching for. he tugs at your sleeve, eyebrows frowning. you feel almost shy looking into his faithful eyes. "will you be there too?"
your mouth opens, "me?" his ears wait for an answer. his fingers fiddling your fabric to as if to annoy a response out of you. reject, accept, deny, he's begging for anything. it doesn't matter.
phainon is entirely devoted to you, for reasons he had yet to explain. this part of his story is not left out. claim, discipline, stipple your mark into him and his skin will not rebound from your carving. until skin melted into flesh, and flesh peeled off his bones, and bones pulverised into dust, everything would remain as history written on his body until then.
at the end of the day, into the night, he is waiting for you. he's hoping you'll do the same.
a velvet smile paints your face, heart beating, your answer as natural as day and night: "i will be waiting too." for him, and his story of devotion.
"when we reunite, let's make a world of our own. one we both belong to, and one where we are free to do everything we want. where the sun guides us and the moon watches over, co-existing." [ ... ]
rule #2 in the 'npc survival handbook': do not get involved with the chrysos heirs.
phainon finds solace in the crook of your neck, strong arms wrapped around you but his hold trembles. you let him do as he please - let his heart, something he almost gave up, finally express itself, and you can hear his heart beat prove its existence. quietly, you card through his white strands with your fingers.
the sun begins to set.
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"phainon, i order you to track this outsider. i do not know how they happened to breach okhema, but i suspect they fell from beyond the sky," agalae instructed, eyes sharpened. "if they make any suspiscious movement, or mention the forbidden, they must be dealt with swiftly."
thus, phainon watched over you, playing executioner. another mission, nothing new. leave them alone if proven harmless, execute if necessary.
standing upright on a rooftop, the first time he laid eyes on you, you were in the middle of marmoreal market, dazed, speaking... to no one? then the chest stealing, the sagelore fruit stuffed in your mouth, doing everything that you pleased - riding the loose currents of freedom, unrestrained by rules. without knowing, bright laughter left his rigid lips.
as days passed, disturbance grew. for whatever reason, the titankin were strongly attracted to you, as if you were an anomaly they had to eliminate. before one of them could strike you-
"hm?" as soon as you turned around to look, there was nothing there but the glaring sun quietly protecting you all along.
months passed like this and phainon slowly carved your existence into amphoreus. from the big movements, the twitching in your expressions. to the hollowness in your eyes when you watched the people chatter, the children running by, the scholars conversing. he saw it then. a black sheep walking among the herd; a shard of the night misfitting itself into bright daylight.
chaos worsened. the black tide brought night and agitated harmony's wavelengths. the titankin spiralled and even more were after your throat. took its toll on phainon as he stayed by your side when amphoreus was asking for him. it was one of the few times that he let his duties go for something he freely chose to do. although, the price to pay was hefty - it was him against many. and the threads hummed tunes about his misdeeds.
as much as the dark scared him, the night carried you to him on that fated day. you were going to kill him. open his stomach. stab his chest. those were most effective. but you felt so warm in his arms when he caught you.
in the back of his mind, a nagging hope procured a promising premonition. a hope brought to flame, his studying that came to fruition, when you tenderly looked after him.
he looked up at you. the moon softly caressed its shimmer upon you. you were moonlight. and from there on, the sun orbited the moon. a devotion that naturally made sense, that was meant to be.
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days turned to weeks. you tried not to think about the emptiness. who are you? someone waiting for their husband to return home from war?
"hey kid, watch out." you steady a brown-haired kid before he could fall over again. he bows, thanking you. you learned his name was theophis.
"buying more sagelore fruit? come, come! the produce this season is at its ripest." their name was auguste.
"good morning, dearie. is phainon not here today either?" her name was hegesia.
again and again, you strolled around okhema, sticking names to familiar faces. the people grew to know you as time moved its hands - a sense of belonging and purpose in a place once foreign. you found yourself engaging with them, not because of a reward, or even being forced to do it.
it is then that you realise it. chatter, talking, noise. yet, everything is too quiet at the same time. no banter, no teasing remark... nothing.
in the middle of marmoreal market, you stand dazed again. something is supposed to guide you in moments like these. your heart is heavy, mourning a loss.
"system?"
the wind slips through your fingers, proudly holding your hand. it answers your call.
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you are sound asleep when the night courses through your balcony, blowing the curtains with its star-glistened breath. the cautious clicking of boots unheard. fingers delicate, lips yearning, but settlling for gently pressing their head against yours, lightly rubbing back and forth. so careful, too delicate, a touch that only borders the rim of a minute gap between you and him, afraid to rouse you from your dreams.
"my moonlight... "
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strangely, you slept well last night. and the night after that. and the next one too. you did your usual routine in marmoreal market and were about to head home when a strong gust of wind attacks you. "woah!" you hold your arms in front you.
the breeze gradually calms, tugging at your clothes. slowly, you lower your arms, feeling the familiarity in its touch. the wind guides you by the hand, dragging you hurriedly to the rooftop and you recognise his back.
"phainon?" he jumps a little at the sound of your voice, his tail wagging. his owner has returned. he awkwardly rubs a hand on the back of his neck, bashful - those ears are red again. what's he hiding?
his shoulders shake slightly. it is taking all his strength to not run into your loving arms. before he could, there was something in his cards to reveal. he turns around, closing the distance, and you finally meet his face. a very flushed one, that is. but a face you missed all the same. he clears his throat. "i want to explore amphoreus, find a quieter place," he says, structuredly, "i will return to okhema when needed, of course, but for now... the heart wants to rest," he extends his hand towards you. "will you come with me?" his hand trembles.
no pressure, no forcing. he is letting your heart decide the flow. he would go anywhere you wanted, as your desires are also his as much as it is yours. this is the freedom he wants, a drift of the wind that you decide, as long as he can ride along it with you. the direction does not matter when the amphoreus is only a speck in the universe, with so much to explore.
a smile creeps onto your lips. you steady his hand into yours. even after all this time, he acts like he's meeting you for the first time. "why wouldn't i?"
"oh," phainon immediately brightens. "g-great!"
you remember the well-rested nights. "but it was you, wasn't it? how come you didn't reveal yourself sooner?"
his encompassing hands fidget with your ring finger. "i... was practicing my lines for days." he looks away. "i was really nervous," he mumbles.
you grin. "what were you so afraid of? it's only me."
he chuckles. "you're right..." slowly, he takes your hand and presses it against his cheek. your cradle is a fondness reserved only for him. in his eyes, an affection that has accompanied you everywhere, since you first got here. a love that didn't need recognition, it only asks to follow you and shower him with the sound of your laughter when he gets lonely. "about everything, about us, i want to tell you how it all started from my eyes. ever since you got here..." -the sun had always followed the moon. he kisses your palm.
and before he forgets, phainon hands you an envelope. it is as heavy as you remember it to be. "all their blessings are in here, the chrysos heirs."
it really sounds like you are getting married. you let out a tired laugh.
there are no more rules. whether from a sense of obligation, freedom or loneliness, you'll both live how you want. become the main characters of your own stories.
"let's go!" with no time to waste, phainon excitedly takes you by the hand, legs flourished by the wind and trails of good fortune. the day is beginning to rise, and the sun is more than happy to follow his moonlight into the next day, and for all of infinity and evermore.
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"godspeed to you," tribbie clasps her hands together in prayer, looking down at the pair from the far above. then, she smiles, her head swaying side-to-side. "searching for a small world of their own. it's almost like an elopement, isn't it, agy?"
aglaea hums, hand on her heart. the threads chime a ceremonial aria, the ice melts ever so little. "the heart... knows what it wants."
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a person closes the novel they were reading. sighing, they pick up their phone and start typing again:
"this author has balls of steel to come back with another disasterous novel. so criiiiiiinge. where was castorice at the end? i was waiting for her! why is the male lead, a powerful warrior, reduced to a lovesick puppy? how does that make sense, you stupid author! such abysmal writing full of holes, leaking enough to fill an entire ocean. insanity, i say!" this random nobody criticises, slamming their fingers on the screen. they clear their throat. "hmph. the next volume better be coming soon."
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a/n: im pooped, expect my third child to come out next year probably. everyone's invited to the baby shower, just make sure to bring ur best costumes. my back breaks everytime i have to argue philosophy with the reader and the characters like,, im being attacked from all sides. fun fact: ever since i prematurely posted my sunday fic, when im sleeping, everytime i hear a phone notif i instantly wake up bc i get scared thinking i accidentally posted again. so thats cool. new trauma gained ig😜 idk what else to say. like and subscribe, hit the bell icon for notifications. lemme know ur fav toothpaste brand. [ new achievement: 'thanks for reading!!' ヾ(*'▽'*)' ]
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eudaimaniacs · 5 months ago
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lunch with a side of a babydoll dress (hugh jackman x female reader)
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word count: 700 words
warning/s: smut with one mention of feet
notes: i included a word count after four posts (well, it happens). also there's one request on my inbox and i'll try answering that asap. i'm not good at fulfilling these requests (i have one dead and deactivated tumble blog to prove it). enough yapping, enjoy reader!
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It was a long day of shooting Hugh's new movie from 5:30 A.M. to 10:30 P.M. of shooting in multiple costumes. He was stressed, to say the least. He didn't have time to rest, rewind, or even fuck his wife.
You hang around on set to provide support for Hugh. You know how stressful filming gets, especially with the time allotted for makeup, costuming, and shooting. You mostly prepare his meals since he prefers your cooking to ordering take-out when he's tired from filming.
One day couldn't get any worse. It was a hot day, meaning Hugh would be tired from the filming and the heat. He wanted to lie down in bed and sleep away his stress. Hugh kept his composure and still treated the staff and cast nicely.
It was lunchtime, and Hugh couldn't wait to eat what you made for him. He went to his trailer and saw your heavenly figure preparing his meal. You were wearing a flowy, white baby doll dress. The sun shone through the ethereal fabric, dancing when you slightly moved. Hugh could trace your curves in the sheer fabric. The softness of your breasts, the soft bend of your waist, and your ass barely peeking out of the short dress.
"Oh, there you are, Hugh! Let's eat right now." You beamed and gave him a peck. He stared for a few seconds before exploring your body with his hands. Hugh felt heaven when he touched every part. He made sure to not miss a spot and treated your body like a goddess.
Hugh growled and remarked, "The lunch can wait, sweetheart. You look so fucking good in that dress." Before you can reply, he caught you by surprise by passionately kissing you.
You hummed and returned the same desperation to Hugh. You tugged his hair as the two of you continued to kiss deeper. Hugh lifted your dress and caressed your breasts. He massaged your nipples, turning them rock solid. Hugh's hands turned their attention to your ass, squeezing and lightly slapping it.
You giggle and break the kiss. "Glad you liked the dress, Hugh. I picked the perfect day to wear it."
Hugh dipped and then kissed your neck. "Have been too stressed today and the days before, honey. I need to relieve myself."
You raised your eyebrows at his suggestion. You were feeling the mood, but someone could walk inside the trailer to tell Hugh to return to set.
"Are you crazy, Hugh? One of your co-stars or makeup artist could come knocking, and they would hear us fucking," you whisper-screamed to Hugh, who was already touching your pussy. You moaned at the sensation of his rough hands rubbing your clit. You tried to protest, but Hugh's actions suppressed it.
"I don't care about them hearing, [Y/N]. I want them to know how good my wife fucking feels."
Hugh raised your dress and took out his cock from the restraint of his tight pants. He pumped it for a few times and then rubbed it at the lips of your pussy. You moaned and rubbed your breasts to further pleasure yourself. Hugh slowly entered, and you let out a loud, shaky whine.
He gradually fastened his pace, knowing he had little time to eat lunch and returning on set. Hugh growled and grabbed your waist as he reached his high. You felt the imprint of his dick on your stomach and hoped that he could see it through your dress.
You moaned and called out his name as you climaxed. You tried grabbing onto something as the sensation of Hugh's stress fucking you left you shaking.
"That was good, baby girl. Come on, let me help you get up," Hugh whispered, grabbing your waist to help you sit down. Your hair was a mess, as was your face. However, your white babydoll dress remained beautiful, sculpting your perfect body and highlighting your best features.
Hugh sat opposite and began eating the lunch you prepared earlier.
"Thank you for the two meals, [Y/N]. I can't wait for dinner tonight."
You winked and rubbed his crotch with your feet. Happily thinking what meal you'll prepare and dress he'll fuck you in with.
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eudaimaniacs - 2024
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kindlythevoid · 3 months ago
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GUYS I FINALLY POSTED THE CHAPTER THIS MEME IS FOR!!!!
It only took me FOUR MONTHS!!!! YAY!!!!
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In honor of Chapter 24:
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It's not posted or finished, I'm just having fun with it. <3
Text post version available under cut.
Merlin: I have to leave Camelot for two days. Gaius: ??? Merlin: I need to restock the honey. Gaius: Merlin: It's very far away. Gaius: Merlin: Gaius: We're not out-- Merlin: Very rare honey.
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aperrywilliams · 8 months ago
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More Than You Say (Spencer Reid x Fem!BAU!Reader)
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——————
Author Masterlist
Part 1: More Than You Know
Part 3: More Than You Expect (the end)
——————
Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!BAU!Reader.
Summary: Spencer mulls over what you said and your love confession during your last fight. And he knows how deeply he fucked up this time. After admitting he is in love with you, Spencer wants to fix things. Are you willing to let him?
Word Count: 5.6k
TW: ANGST. Strong language. Mention of abduction, drug use, getting shot, death of relatives and loved ones, jail, and unsafe sex. If I forgot anything, let me know.
A/N: This is the aftermath of 'More Than You Know' from Spencer's POV. I'm not going to lie. This one ends worse than the previous one. The good news is that there is a third chance, meaning a third part. Maybe they will have luck in that one.
——————
Spencer doesn't know how long he has stood there, looking at the door you shut when you left. His first thought was to run after you, but he refrained.
What could he have said to you?
Sitting in the chair that you left vacant, he takes a deep breath. The room feels suffocating to him.
Your words keep reverberating in his brain, and Spencer wants to feel utterly surprised, but it would be a lie. Not that he precisely knew what was going on; it was more like he sensed something was off, and he ignored it.
Like a royal asshole.
The hurt in your eyes is something he knows he will never forget. Those kind eyes that were always welcoming and understanding, this time, only reflected betrayal and pain.
Spencer hates his mouth and the way his words can do so much harm.
Rewinding the past months in his brain, Spencer tries to figure out how you both ended like this.
You never told him how you felt, and Spencer is sure about it. He would have done something if you did.
He is so caught up in his thoughts that he doesn't notice Emily walking into the room.
"She told you, didn't she? You must have hella pissed her off," Emily muses. And Spencer can't help but return a confused look.
"Wait. You knew?"
Emily let out a frustrated sigh, sitting in front of Spencer.
"Sometimes I wonder why that amount of IQ doesn't pay off," she wonders. Seeing the man still clueless, she continues talking. "Spencer, possibly the only one who didn't know at this point was you."
Great. Everyone knew but him. Spencer wants to dig a hole and disappear right now.
"Why she didn't tell me?"
The question is more to himself than Emily. She answers nonetheless.
"I'm not sure if she ever wanted you to know. If you hadn't pushed her the way you did, she would never have told you, I guess."
Spencer takes in Emily's words and starts questioning everything about you and him in the past months.
"I assumed so many things lately, and now I'm unsure if they are true or part of my imagination," he says, frustrated, raking his hands through his hair.
"You have the answers, Spencer. Even if you think you don't."
Spencer scoffs at that. He doesn't fucking know anything. That's the problem. He needs to fix something but doesn't know what it is.
"I need to talk to her," he decides, standing and walking to the door. Before he could cross the threshold, Emily calls his name.
"Reid, wait."
Spencer turns to see Emily. She has a stern look.
"Don't talk to her unless you know what you want to say."
Spencer's eyes narrow. He can't conceive of not talking to you right now. He wants to run to your place right away.
"What? But Emily, I need to know-"
Spencer argues, but Emily doesn't let him finish.
"You'll figure it out. Just don't rush it. She has been through a lot. At least you owe her that. Think about what she told you first."
Spencer doesn't know what to do—the compulsion to run after you clouds his senses, but Emily has a point. He doesn't know what to say. Yeah, he is sorry for what he said to you and how he treated you, but an 'I'm sorry' won't fix it.
Besides, until that day, Spencer thought you both were only friends, and you were okay with it. He only pegged all your apprehensions and the words of concern like a friend's worry.
It seems he did a great job ignoring what it was in front of his eyes.
You said you loved him. And Spencer has no reason to doubt your words, even if he told you he does.
Spencer leaves the conference room defeated and with a weight over his shoulders he hasn't felt in a long time.
As he passes your desk, he sees it empty, and his stomach clenches. It's like being in a parallel world where you are not next to him, and just imagining it disturbs him.
The rest of the team watches as Spencer wanders around the BAU like a lost puppy, wondering if this will make him really reflect on how he's been leading his life lately. They know the bond between you and Spencer is important to both of you, but they've also seen how it has deteriorated over time.
That night, as he steps into his apartment after work, he only wants to grab the phone and call you. But Emily's words start replaying again.
'You'll figure it out. At least you owe her that.'
Spencer opts to sit on the couch with the lights off and his head back.
He needs to fix this.
When he closes his eyes, his mind wanders to the day he met you.
-
He was a scared kid, a freshman FBI agent recruited by Jason Gideon. He put a foot in the bullpen that day, and Hotch was the first to greet him. His stern look was different from Gideon's and more intimidating for sure. He led Spencer to the conference room, where you were perched in a corner with a mug of coffee in your hands.
'This is SSA (Y/N) (Y/L/N). It's her first day, too. Agent (Y/L/N), he is SSA Dr. Spencer Reid; he is joining the team as well.'
You glanced at him and rapidly stood from your spot, stretching your hand to him. He should have shaken it, but his germaphobe self kicked off.
'The number of pathogens passed during a handshake is staggering. It's actually safer to kiss.'
After the words left his mouth, he wanted to be buried alive. You retracted your hand with an amused smile.
'I didn't know. But I guess we should skip the kiss part for now,' you said, and Spencer's cheeks burned in embarrassment. Seeing him all flustered, you quickly added. 'But It's good to know new things. I think I'll learn a lot from you, Dr. Reid.'
This time, Spencer's cheeks burned from more than embarrassment.
It might sound cliché to say that for the first time in his life, Spencer felt so comfortable with someone. You quickly became his best friend and unmatched support. People wondered why. To outsider's eyes, you both looked so different. You were more confident than him, with an extraordinary ability to listen and say the right words at the right time. You were one of the few people who wasn't intimidated by either Hotch or Gideon, a thing he could not say about himself.
And, by far, you have been the only person there for him when Spencer has needed it the most.
He remembers having the vial in his hand. He stared at the item for a while, deciding whether to use it. It has been weeks since Hankel kidnapped him, and he stole the Dilaudid from his dead body.
He was feeling trapped and hopeless. Spencer thought he could handle it, but every day, it seemed worse than the previous one.
His feet carried him to your door that night. He knocked but didn't know why. Maybe he hoped to find some strength he didn't have.
You opened the door and glanced at him, confused. He wasn't okay, and he didn't look alright, either.
'Spencer? What are you doing here?' you asked, your voice laced with worry.
'I'm sorry I didn't call before coming.'
He didn't know how he managed to get words out of his mouth. Spencer was to a second to crumble.
'It's okay. What happened? Are you hurt?' Your eyes scanned his body for a sign of what was going on.
'I don't - I can't (Y/N). I can't do this. I need help.'
Spencer broke, sobbing at your door. You rushed to hug him; you didn't even care that you were in the middle of the hallway.
That night, Spencer confessed his sins, and he found nothing but understanding and support in you. He didn't know he deserved either of these things until he met you.
As you both got closer, he learned everything about you. In the same way that he confided his life to you, you did the same to him. And Spencer never hesitated when you needed him.
You called him sobbing that night. Your dad was suddenly admitted into the hospital due to an illness he hadn't told anyone before. You were his only close family member. Your mom left the country when your parents divorced a decade ago, and your two older siblings lived in other towns.
'Hey, I came the faster I could. What happened?' Spencer rushed into the hospital waiting room where you were. You darted your glassy eyes at him, with lips quivering.
'He isn't okay, Spencer. The doctor says he- oh God - he will not make it,' you broke, with a sob raking through you.
Spencer engulfed you in a tight embrace. You cried with your head on his chest. He would have given everything to rip off your pain and carry it himself.
You both stayed in the hospital that night. You at least could see your dad for a moment to say goodbye. At dawn the next day, he passed away.
Spencer remained with you through your grieving process and swore to be by your side and protect you for the rest of his life, no matter what.
And like that, life kept testing your bond with Spencer—failed relationships, elusive psychopaths, work injuries, friends gone, faked deaths, and so on. The BAU changed, but you both remained.
Sometimes, Spencer wondered if destiny was a real thing. Maybe with you, it was—his best friend.
He was truly happy having you in his life, but why sometimes did it feel like something was missing?
Spencer questioned his feelings about you for a long time. Was it something more than a platonic sentiment? Why was his heart filled with joy every time he saw your smile or heard your laugh? And it plugged with gloom when you were sad?
With time, Spencer was convinced he loved you but kept his mouth shut. He told himself he was over-reading the signs. And Spencer blamed his early lack of affection and inexperience in the heart's department. You undoubtedly didn't feel the way he did, and he was creating a whole imaginary world that would crush the moment the bubble popped.
People around weren't helping either. After telling Morgan how he felt about you, he kept telling Spencer that he needed to make a move.
JJ, for her part, let out her insinuations about how he should do something and the high probability of his feelings being reciprocated.
But Spencer wasn't sure, and the risk of losing you for overstepping your bond terrified him, so he said nothing.
And things could have stayed that way, but a light of hope for him opened time after.
Morgan and Hotch had left the BAU, and the team was focused on trying to catch Scratch. At the same time, Spencer was dealing with his mom's illness and her recently diagnosed Alzheimer's. As always, you were there for him.
"Are you sure you don't want me to go with you to Houston?" you asked him, sitting on his couch one night.
"No. It's okay. It will be only two days," Spencer assured you. He felt terrible for lying to you. He never did that before, but he knew you would talk some sense to him about what he was doing on his trips to Mexico.
"Will you call me if you need anything?" you insisted, and Spencer could only think how much he wanted to hug and kiss you. But he won't do that. He can't do that without telling you he loves you. Not without risking losing you due to a stupid love confession.
Spencer was so lost in his thoughts that he didn't notice his lack of response to your question.
"Spencer? Are you okay?"
With still a semi-hazed brain, his hands reached yours, and his eyes locked with yours. A frown of worry appeared on your face.
"Have I ever told you how grateful I am for having you in my life?"
A blush crept from your neck to your cheeks. It wasn't the first time Spencer had told you something like that, but how he looked at you that night, with that intensity, was making you weak on the knees.
"Yeah. A couple of times, if I recall correctly," you replied, trying to sound casual, but inside, you were aflame with his gaze.
"I think I should say it more. And to show it like it really is," Spencer mumbled, and you were confused. What was he trying to say?
"You mean like buying me more coffees and bagels?" you joked. You always did that when you were nervous, and Spencer knew it.
In a bold move and without letting your hands go, he scooted closer to you on the couch.
It was now or never. Spencer knew then this was his chance, and if he didn't take it, he would never do it again.
"Can - can I tell you something?" he asked, flicking his gaze between your eyes and your lips back and forth.
You noticed the gesture and were about to combust. Why was Spencer looking at your lips like that?
"Yes." Your voice above a whisper, fearing it could falter if you spoke louder.
"I want to kiss you so bad right now," he whispered back, so close you could feel his breath fanning your face. Your lips parted to say something, but no words came from them. Instead, you were the one who closed the gap between you both and kissed him.
Spencer kissed you back immediately with such urgency that you could feel the longing and desperation on his lips.
Deepening the kiss, neither you nor he wanted to stop. Fearing if you did, the moment would vanish, and you would wake up from this beautiful dream.
Maybe this was the chance you both needed to confess your feelings for each other. But fate could be cruel more than once.
In the middle of that years-making kiss, your phone rang suddenly. The infamous sound made you both jump back and return to reality.
Still dazed, you fished the device from your pocket. Emily was calling. You didn't know what to do. Should you answer your phone and cut the moment? Or ignore it and grasp Spencer's lapels to kiss him again?
Your bewildered look made Spencer decide for you.
"You should take that. Could be important," he said, voice laced with doom. He knew what was coming. You wanted to argue, but maybe he was right. Reluctantly, you slid your finger on the green bottom.
"Emily?"
The team had a new case, and it was urgent. You needed to be on the tarmac in twenty minutes.
"Can we - can we talk about this later?"
You were unsure where you were standing. Sure, you felt the electricity of that kiss; you didn't imagine it. But maybe it wasn't like you were thinking. Perhaps it was just the heat of the moment. A lot of things were happening, and you both were vulnerable.
On his part, Spencer saw this as a sign. This wasn't the time or the place. He didn't feel prepared to face his true feelings at the moment.
"Sure. Uh, but now you should go; they are waiting."
The bad thing is you never talked about that again. You went with the team to Connecticut while Spencer left the following day, not to Houston like he said to you. He went to Mexico.
The next time you saw each other was with Spencer in a cell in Matamoros.
There are a lot of things Spencer regrets about that infamous trip. One of them is to lose his chance to know if he could have built something more with you. How could Spencer imagine having a relationship with you now? After he lied to you? After falling in disgrace like this? You deserved more than a broken man, incarcerated and lost. Spencer didn't want to drag you with him and his misery. He couldn't stand the idea of breaking your heart for a failed relationship, but he didn't want to lose you either. The reasonable middle ground for Spencer was keeping you like his friend, as it has been until now.
After Spencer was released from prison, neither you nor him spoke of that night. He presumed you regretted kissing him, and he was afraid to say what it meant to him.
Everything got lost after his release. Spencer became reckless and superficial. He was a different guy. But everyone dispensed him due to the traumatic events he endured. You did it, too. You had stayed and committed yourself to him in the role you knew so well: as his best friend.
And that's what Spencer saw since then: you by his side, supporting him like the good friend you were. And he thought it was okay. You were alright, and he should have to live with the idea of not knowing what it could be to love you openly.
That's how Spencer immersed himself in a shallow and meaningless life, failing his true self and becoming a person he despised but who shielded him in his vulnerability.
-
The cell phone ringtone brings Spencer back from his thoughts. He quickly pulls it out of his pants pocket, secretly hoping it's you. It's a long shot, but he wants it so badly to be real. A short-lived wish because the caller ID shows it's Gabrielle, his late conquest.
Spencer lets out a heavy sigh, and your words come back to him.
'No! It's everything! Can't you see it? It's the way you lie to your teammates and the way you do your job like it doesn't matter to you. The way you turn everything into something meaningless. The relationships you have, your job, your friends. Everything!'
Spencer feels his body stiffen. It's like he's looking at himself from the outside, and what he sees terrifies him.
That's what you've seen in him, and he understands why you've walked away from him like that. The person he has become is to blame for your pain, and Spencer feels sick. He, who swore years ago to protect you from all harm, is the one who caused this.
'Do you really believe that? Do you really believe your self-destructive behavior only affects you? I didn't think you were so selfish, Spencer.'
Selfish. It's what he's been all along. And you had to be the one to throw it in his face to realize his mistakes.
Spencer doesn't have the energy or courage to answer the phone. He knows why Gabrielle is calling, and what 24 hours ago would have been a tempting offer now feels futile and pointless.
It's meaningless because the only truly significant relationship he has wanted all along is with you, nobody else.
And possibly you are in your apartment thinking Spencer is an asshole, believing he doesn't value you, that he doesn't care about you, that he doesn't love you. And while the asshole part it's true, he does care about you, and he does love you.
It may be too overdue, but it's time for you to know, he thinks.
With a resolution Spencer didn't know he had, he stands from his couch to grab his coat and keys. He is going to reveal his secret tonight. He is going to admit his underlying love to you and stop his charade.
During the car ride, he is having a pep talk with himself, trying not to lose the bravery that made him leave the apartment.
You have to know. He has to clear things up and get you back.
Spencer keeps repeating the words until he's at your door, calling with two solid knocks.
After some rustling from inside, the door opens, revealing your unhappy face. Spencer knows he deserves all the bitterness and pettiness you have and will throw at him, and he's going to take it all.
"You didn't check the clock before coming here, did you?" is the first thing coming from your mouth.
Spencer takes in your appearance. You're in your pajamas already, but the bags under your eyes tell him you weren't sleeping, and possibly you have been tossing and turning for hours now.
"I'm sorry. I know it's late, but we need to talk."
The roll in your eyes doesn't go unnoticed by him; it's like you weren't surprised by him standing at your door at 2 am.
"Spencer, if you want to talk about what happened this afternoon, I don't think-"
"Please? I know I behaved like an idiot today, but please let me explain," Spencer insists, and he really hopes you don't close the door in his face.
You contemplate your response for a second. Spencer knows you know he won't leave without talking to you, so you open the door just enough and signal him to come inside.
Spencer comes in and waits for you to close the door. The resolve with which he came is fading as his brain tries to organize his ideas and all the things he wants to say.
You gesture towards the couch, and he takes a seat. You too, but in a chair next to it.
Where to start? Spencer thinks about just blurting out everything and spilling his heart in front of you. But you are the one who starts talking.
"Why are you here?"
Spencer clears his throat. "I - I want to apologize for what I said. I hurt you, and I didn't mean to do that. I really didn't mean to do that."
"But you did," you say flatly, and he nods.
"I know. And I'm sorry. I let you down, and I feel horrible misreading the whole thing. I should have noticed."
Spencer barely blinks, trying to gauge your expression. You're difficult to read right now, and he hates it. You guys always were so good at reading each other, and he lost that ability, too.
"If you are talking about-" You seem ready to say something to not address the subject, so Spencer only blurts his question.
"Is it true? Do you love me?"
You sigh, shaking your head.
"Spencer-" You start, but Spencer doesn't budge. He needs to know and to hear it from you.
"Please, tell me," he pleads, and you let out a bitter chuckle.
"Why? It doesn't matter. It won't change where we stand right now," you convey with some treacherous tears fighting to fall. You avert his gaze.
Spencer stands and kneels in front of you.
"Please, look at me."
His index tilts up your chin so he can see your eyes. You surprisingly let him do that. "I need to know if you feel the same way I do about you," he whispers, his eyes fixated on yours. You furrow your eyebrows.
"What are you talking about?" One of his hands tenderly poses on your cheek to dry some of the tears falling.
"What I'm trying to say is that I love you. I have always loved you."
God, it feels so good to say it finally.
"W - What?" You look perplexed, and Spencer knows this is the opportunity he has to come clean with you.
"I know I didn't tell you sooner. It's long overdue, and even if I have my reasons, they don't excuse how I have treated you in the past months. But I promise things will change. I won't hide this anymore. Please, give me a chance to love you."
You seem overwhelmed with the information, so much so that you stand and start to pace in your living room. Spencer gets up as well and follows you with his eyes.
"Spencer, how- I - I don't understand. Why are you telling me this?"
"Because it's true. You are the one for me. I love you (Y/N)."
It seems now that he's said it once, Spencer spares no effort in repeating he loves you over and over again.
You stop pacing to look at him, an accusatory look in your eyes.
"Why now?"
Spencer understands your apprehensions. Of course, after everything that had taken place in the last hours, he comes to your door proclaiming his love. Logically, you are confused and don't expect it.
"Do you remember the night we kissed? The night before I went to Mexico?" He asks, and your gaze softens at the mention of that night.
"I do. But I thought you forgot," you say, casting your eyes down.
"How could I?! I wanted to do that for a long time. I couldn't believe we were finally kissing. It was like a dream come true for me," he recognizes, shorting the distance between you both and tentatively cupping your cheeks. You let him.
"But - but after the call, you - you told me-" you stutter, recalling the details of what occurred there.
"I know. I chickened out. After Emily's call, I thought it was a sign and not the right moment, so I backed off. There is no single day I don't regret doing that." Spencer's eyes glasses over, thinking about how foolish and blind he has been all this time.
"Why you didn't tell me?" you murmur, almost in a whisper.
"Because I'm stupid. Because I thought I was protecting you. I was in jail (Y/N); what could I have offered you?"
You huff and shake your head, putting distance between you both. Spencer's arms fall to his sides.
"And after that?"
Spencer knows you're talking about the time after he was released from Milburn. He gives you an apologetic look before answering.
"I thought I was doing the same. That having you as a friend was better than not having you at all," he concedes. Maybe it's the hardest part for him to admit because, when that happened, everything started to crumble between you both.
"So that was the friendship bullshit," you sneer. Spencer nods.
"Yeah. And I'll always be sorry for doing that to you. But I promise you, if you let me, things will change."
You go silent, mulling over his words, and it's like your defenses start to turn down. You look at Spencer with a mix of emotions he can't still crack. Maybe his words are void for you right now. That's why Spencer thinks showing you what he means is better than keep talking.
He slowly approaches you without breaking eye contact. With one of his hands, Spencer tilts up your chin while he leans down. He can hear the air hitching in your throat. His heart beats faster and faster as he gets closer and closer.
You do not move a muscle, nor do you reject his touch.
When his lips make contact with yours, you both let out a sigh you were holding. Your lips begin to move in sync. Spencer is kissing you, you're kissing him back, and there is no phone ringing.
Spencer gives you everything he has, trying to express he is yours and no one else's. You are both lost in a kiss that seems increasingly urgent and desperate.
But suddenly, you push him away. It's as if a jolt of electricity has struck you, shoving you away from him.
"Please, don't. Don't -" you mewl in a broken voice. Still dazed, Spencer looks at you, baffled.
"W - What's wrong?"
"I - I can't," you mumble, running your hands through your hair and shaking your head.
"Why not?" Spencer asks, and when you keep shaking your head and saying nothing, he starts to panic. "(Y/N), please. Talk to me."
"Spencer, I'm sorry. I can't do this," you repeat—this time with a steadier voice. "This isn't going to work."
Isn't it going to work? Spencer doesn't understand why you are saying that when you both just have admitted the truth.
"But I thought you loved me?"
Spencer's voice is small, frightened. It's as if, in five seconds, he went from the top of a mountain to a free fall into the void.
You look at him for a second, and it's like a realization hits you.
"So that's the reason? You are here and saying all these things because I told you I loved you?"
The accusing, defensive tone returns to you. And Spencer doesn't know what to do.
"No! I mean, yes! I thought a lot about what you told me. And I realized my feelings for you have always been there. That's why I'm here," he defends.
You insistently rub your eyes with your palms like someone who desperately wants to wake up from a dream.
"I'm sorry, but I can't believe you."
Spencer's eyes widen. You've closed yourself completely and thrown the key out the window.
"But it's true! I can prove it. I can be a better man for you if you give me a chance. Please." Spencer is begging, tears rolling down his face, but he doesn't care. He will do anything to get you back at this point.
"Spencer. Listen to me. Things don't work like that, okay? You hurt me, and I'm not talking about my romantic feelings for you. You questioned my loyalty as your friend. Do you know how that made me feel?"
"I'm sorry-" he tries to explain, but you cut him off.
"It's true what I told you earlier. I chose our friendship above acting on my love for you. And it seems I did it in vain."
Spencer shakes his head. "No, no, no. Don't say that. I know I did wrong, but I can make it up to you."
Can he really?
"Spencer, you need to make it up, but to you, not to me." Spencer's head snaps up.
"What - what are you talking about?"
You let out a deep sigh. "We both know you know."
"Prison," he confirms, embarrassed of what that word implies.
"And how your life has been since then."
"I know I fucked up. I hurt you-"
If thousands of apologies are necessary, he's willing to give you all of them.
"You hurt people, Spencer! Not only me! You fooled around; you have been treating women poorly and playing with their feelings. You have lied to your friends and pushed them away. And the worst part is you have been hurting yourself with all this!"
Spencer's eyes squeeze shut. You are right. He knows that. But he is so terrified about you walking away from him that he can't see the big picture.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."
"I know you do. But I can't do this anymore. Supporting your self-destructive actions is not helping anyone."
"I know. And I'm not asking you to do that. I'm asking for a chance to show you I'm the guy who would do anything for you. Please?"
"Spencer, that's exactly my point. You must heal because of yourself, not because of me or anyone for that matter."
"I'm not-"
"Listen to yourself. You say you want a chance? But you only ask it after I poured out my heart this afternoon. How can I trust you when you have only shown me this version of you? Don't ask me to believe it."
There are a lot of things Spencer knows he has to do. He has a lot of mistakes to face and make amends for. But he fails to realize that the first amendment he needs to make is to himself.
That's what you have been trying to tell him.
"Are you saying there are no us?"
It's almost a rhetorical question at this point, but Spencer asks it anyway.
You look at him with sorrow in your eyes.
"There is nothing I want more than to be in your life, but in these circumstances, I don't think it's possible. Not when you must clear your head and think about what you want first. For real."
"But I love you; please don't ask me to step away."
It's another plea. The last resource Spencer has in him.
"I'm not asking you for that. What I'm asking you is if you really love me, don't drag me with you in this process you're going through now. I can't - I don't have the strength to stay by your side in this one. I'm sorry, but I need to think of myself this time."
"(Y/N)-"
"And now, I ask you for you to leave, please. It's late," you say, walking to the entrance and opening the front door.
It's late. Those words mean so much more to Spencer now.
It's too late for a love confession when you've already ruined everything that supported it.
It's too late to try to fix the mistakes he has made with you. Even tonight, it was daring to come to your home late at night, being inconsiderate of your space and time.
There is no way he can do something now without hurting you.
Maybe time will give him a hand, and the wounds will soften. Spencer hopes that by making real changes in his life, you will see he really meant everything he has said tonight.
What Spencer doesn't know is that you won't be around to see those changes happen.
——————
Spencer Reid's Taglist: @dreatine @nomajdetective @jayyeahthatsme @rosalinasam2 @averyhotchner @lovelyxtom @princessmiaelicia @pastelbabygirl19 @reidsbookclub @alexxavicry @gspenc @spencerreidisbae123 @calmspencer @pauline5525mgg @anamiad00msday @milivanili99 @laylasbunbunny @leahblackk @miaxx03 @missabsey @taintedstranger @khxna @hiireadstuff @pleasantwitchgarden @dysphoricsanity @levi-of-starz @themoonchildwhofell @silver138 @lovelybaka @shinytinywhispers 
For those who asked for a part 2 (I'm so sorry for the delay): @gghostwriter @sebastiansstanswhore @evvy96 @pillsbury-doughgirl @singinghamtaro-blog @atlantica-angels @lukesmainpiece @ladyofhellhounds @gubzgirl @shqwqrma @hereforfun-31 @reader1402
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steddieasitgoes · 7 months ago
Text
not so dirty little secret
written for @steddie-week Day 1 prompt: Mystery/Secret Relationship Rating: T | wc: 2128 | no cw Read on ao3
Steve’s lounging on the Munson’s couch, right-hand wrist deep in a bowl of popcorn, when Eddie stalks into the room. He’s got two beers in hand and is mumbling about something, words muffled by the rim of the beer bottle as he takes aggressive sips. It’s not unusual to hear but not understand what his rumblings are — Steve’s become accustomed to his quiet but loud brainstorming sessions. What is unusual, however, is the pinch of his brows and the slight downturn of his lips as he does so. Curious, Steve perks up and leans forward.  
“Penny for your thoughts?” 
Eddie gasps, scandalized. “My thoughts are worth at least a dime, Stevie!” 
Taking a more calculated, calming swig of his beer, he drapes himself on the couch beside Steve and sighs. “I think Wayne is knocking boots with someone.” 
The words leave Eddie’s mouth with a nonchalance, as if he’s giving Steve an update about the weather.  It’s something he does often with no explanation, at least not one Steve’s discovered yet, and it’s quickly becoming another quirk in a long list of ones he’s coming to love about Eddie.  
This though… this is a whole other monster. 
Steve's eyes widen and blink in confusion. His lips fall into a soft, confused pout as he tilts his head to the side — the tell-tale sign that he has no idea what Eddie is talking about. It’s a sign Eddie picks up on immediately, with — the both of them well-versed in their non-verbal body language as of now, so he clarifies. 
“You know, knocking boots? Doing the dirty? Bumping uglies? Hanky Pa—“ 
Well, over-clarifies. 
“I get it!” Steve shouts, face reddening.
It’s weird, feeling the heat spread across his cheeks and down his neck. He’s never been embarrassed by sex before. Kind of hard to be when his entire high school reputation revolved around who he was (or wasn’t) jumping into bed with. Never mind the fact that he actually only ever did it twice. He couldn’t go a week without it being brought up at least once, and each time, Steve had glided through the conversation with flying colors, hardly embarrassed. 
Back then was different, though. It was all talk at the end of the day. Mostly make-believe talk. This, though? Listening to Eddie talk about his uncle’s very real sex life? He’d be concerned if he didn’t find it mortally embarrassing. 
Clearing his throat, Steve shifts in his seat. 
“Does it matter if he is? Ya’ know, bumping boots or whatever?” 
Eddie cackles, throwing his entire body into it until the bowl of popcorn topples over onto the couch between them. So much for movie night Steve thinks as he tries to save as many of the kernels as he can before they fall into the couch cushion abyss. Not like he had been looking forward to eating or anything. 
“Does it matter if he is?” Eddie huffs, half-mocking Steve as he shakes his head. “Of course, it matters! It’s my uncle! What if we like, walked in on him or something because we don’t know what’s going on? That would scare me for life, Stevie. I’d need therapy!” 
“You’re already in therapy.” 
“Well, I’d need another therapist. One who specializes in the traumatic experience of walking in on your parental figure getting his di—“ 
“Let’s just rewind for a minute.” Steve shuts his eyes, willing his brain not to conjure up the image Eddie’s so keen on painting for him. His therapy bills are expensive enough, he doesn’t need to add another session just to talk about whatever the hell this conversation is. “If Wayne is in a relationship, which you don’t even know if he is, why would he keep it a secret?” 
“I don’t know. You’ve met him! He’s weird and secretive like that. I didn’t even  know his middle name until I was fourteen and swiped his license so I could buy cigarettes.” 
Steve remembers that story. It was one of the first of many never-ending cascades of embarrassing childhood stories Wayne shared with him that always turned Eddie scarlet. Eddie always gets upset when Wayne tells them, never failing to pout over not having someone on Steve’s side to badger for his own stories. Steve, happy to keep his past in the past, has grown used to shrugging him off and urging Wayne to tell him more.
“Not telling you his middle name is a lot different than hiding an entire person,” Steve continues to reason as he relocates the popcorn bowl to the table in front of them. “Why do you think he’s hiding someone anyway?”
“I’m glad you asked,” Eddie says, turning on the couch to better face Steve. He folds one leg under himself, the other hanging off the edge, foot planted and bouncing in an erratic rhythm Steve’s willing to bet is a new beat for a song. Eddie takes one more swig of his beer and then clears his throat as he claps his hands together. “Evidence número
 uno, he’s been smiling more lately.” 
“And I’m sure that has nothing to do with the fact that you’re back home and on the mend.” 
“Hey! Don’t interrupt me to remind me that my uncle loves me. It ruins my street cred.” 
Steve shoots his hands up in defense, shaking his head at his boyfriend's antics. 
“Evidence numéro deux—“
“You’ve been spending too much time with Robin,” Steve mumbles, taking a swig from his own beer this time. All this language-switching is giving him a headache. 
“Evidence numéro deux!” Eddie repeats, louder this time as he holds up two fingers. He’s kneeling now, knees sinking into the well-loved fabric of the couch. “He’s been using a new mug.” 
“Someone call the police! Wayne’s using a new mug.” 
If looks could kill, Eddie would be a modern day Medusa and Steve would be stoned to the couch.
“Evidence number three — and this is the most damning of evidence — Wayne has had plans every Monday night for the last two months.” He jumps to his feet now and begins pacing around the living room. 
Wait, Monday nights? But that’s — 
Oh. 
Eddie is so off base. So, so, so far off base, he might as well be lost in space. Steve bites the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing. The last thing he wants to do is upset him more than he already has with his interjections. 
But this is hilarious. Downright hysterical. 
And honestly, the truth might be a harder pill for Eddie to swallow than this mystery lover he’s dreamed up. Because that is way easier to explain than the truth, that Wayne has been spending every Monday night for two months with Steve… watching football. 
“Two months, Stevie!” Eddie shouts, pulling Steve from his thoughts. “He comes home from work, changes, and then he leaves and doesn’t come back home for hours! I mean, maybe I’m being a bit generous since he is gone for hours. I can’t imagine he’d have that kind of stamina, but maybe he—” 
The front door opens, interrupting whatever cursed thought was about to spill from Eddie’s lip to reveal the older man in question. Steve’s never been so grateful to see Wayne — even if he’s the reason this entire conversation is happening right now. 
“Eds. Steve.” Wayne nods at each of them before crossing into the kitchen to fetch his own beer. He returns a moment later, collapsing into his recliner with the same dramatics as Eddie. “What are ya boys talkin’ ‘bout?” 
It’s kind of hard to be a religious man when he’s witnessed hell on Earth and had to claw his way out of it, no sign of divine intervention in sight. And yet, Steve can’t help but shut his eyes and say a silent prayer to whoever may be listening that his boyfriend keeps his mouth shut for once in his life. 
The power of prayer isn’t on Steve’s side though apparently, as he watches Eddie’s eyes get that twinkle in them right then and there, a mischievous glint that he has a love-hate relationship with. Sure, it’s cute as hell, but god dammit, every time it happens, Steve ends up having to bail him out of trouble. He really doesn’t want to have to do that right now, not for this. 
“Funny you should ask, Wayne—“
The intro to the seven o’clock news cuts him off. Maybe Steve’s prayers have been answered. Maybe this is what people talk about when they say that God works in mysterious ways. Maybe— 
“We’re coming to you live from The Hoosier Dome to bring you breaking news about our Indianapolis Colts.” 
“Bet it’s got to do with that coach they got runnin’ the place. Still can’t believe he ran that damn childish play on Monday.” 
“Tell me about it,” Steve says, shaking his head. “You know how I feel about the Colts, but you should’ve won that game.” 
“Least we get a rematch later in the season,” Wayne says, sipping his beer. “We gotta go to Diana’s for that game. If we lose, I can drown my sorrows in a real whisky instead of that cheap shit Glen keeps selling us.” 
“Us?” Eddie balks.
Steve watches in real time as Eddie puts the pieces together. His eyes widen then narrow into judgemental slits. His lips purse, head swiveling between the two of them and the television like he does when he’s DMing an intense session for the kids. Eddie’s sharp, always has been, and he wears his emotions on his face, so it’s easy to know when everything clicks in that chaotic mind of his. He might as well have buzzers going off behind him. 
“You!” He shouts, pointing an accusatory finger in Steve’s direction. “You’re the one keeping my uncle out late! Making him happy!” 
“What’s he talkin’ ‘bout?” Wayne asks.
Steve bits his lip. “Eddie, uh, thought you had a secret lover that’s been keeping you out on Monday nights.” 
“A secret lover?” Wayne laughs. “On a Monday night? Boy if I was gettin’ handsy with someone it wouldn’t be on no Monday night. I’m a Friday night gentleman, you know that. Maybe even Saturday mornin’ if I’m lucky.” 
“I don’t know anything anymore!” Eddie shouts, really doubling down on his theatrics. There’s a moment of calm before his brain conjures up something sinister — at least, Steve thinks it must be really bad judging by the paleness in Eddie’s face and the anger in his eyes. Finally, he explodes. “You’re cheating on me with my Uncle!” 
“I am not!” 
“Maybe not physically — Jesus H. Christ, ew, please please tell me it’s not physical. I think I’m gonna be sick.” 
“Now hold your horses a minute, Eds.” Wayne stops Eddie in his tracks with an easy hand around his wrist. “Steve here ain’t do nothin’ wrong but offer me his company during the games. I’d watch them with you. Hell, we both would. But, we know you hate ‘em.” 
“So it’s my fault then?” 
“I ain’t say that.” 
“You implied it, old man!” Eddie says, jabbing his finger in Wayne’s direction now. “You better keep your blue-collar hands away from my debutant boyfriend.” 
“You two are both ridiculous,” Steve laughs, shaking his head. He turns to Eddie, giving his best attempt as his puppy dog apology eyes. “It wasn’t meant to be a secret. You’re just never home on Mondays anyway, so we never thought to mention it. But if it bothers you so much, come with us this week. You’ll see for yourself no one’s stealing my honor, or whatever and it’s going to be a good game.” 
“Not for the Colts,” Wayne grumbles. 
Eddie makes a big show of considering the offer before shuttering. “And spend the night at Glen’s sports bar? I think I’d rather you cheat on me with my uncle—“ 
“Can we please stop talking about this?” Steve runs a frustrated hand down his face. “It’s grossing me out. No offense, Wayne.” 
“I’d be offended if you weren’t grossed out, son.” 
“Hey! I was talking,” Eddie squawks. Steve gives him his undivided attention, Wayne’s not so graceful, offering him a grunt and a hand gesture telling him to stop blocking the television. “As I was saying, you two can have your little sports bromance thing, butI do expect you to buy me a new mug for all my troubles, Stevie. S’not fair you got one for Wayne and not me.” 
“I’ll take you to the store tomorrow, and you can pick it up yourself.” 
“Thank you.” After a moment, Eddie sinks back into his side of the couch cushion and reaches for the half-full bowl of popcorn on the table. “Now, let’s start this movie night.” 
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slasherscream · 8 months ago
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i would love to know which of the crazy ass boys gang would indulge a partner who watches reality tv? whose getting just as invested and angry and who is standing to the side saying it’s dumb and fake? (i know it’s kevin)
❥ who grins and bares it so they can bond with you ❥
Billy Loomis - This is just a bonding activity for Billy. It’s not awful. Nor is it the most fun thing in the world. It’s just one of those tiny moments that relationships are built off. The small bids for connection that build intimacy. You don’t bitch when he wants to watch Psycho for the sixth time in two months. He doesn’t bitch when you turn on trashy TV. He pulls you close, so that you’re sitting in his lap, or laid up against him, and pays enough attention to ask you the odd question or two to clarify what’s going on if he gets lost. What do you mean they switch couples?? When did they start doing that? Last week… oh I bet Luca was pissed. 
David Mccall - David is obnoxious because he pretends to be the type who is upset when you watch without him. He’ll come home, glance at the TV and gasp dramatically: Baby! Why are you watching our show without me?! How far along are you? You watched an entire episode? You know better than that, baby! You gotta rewind it, hold on, I’ll order us some pizza. Can’t believe you’d watch behind my back! This is a ridiculous pantomime that you may or may not pick up on. Mileage varies as always. David couldn’t care less about the reality TV shows you watch. But he likes the way you giggle as you rewind it for him. Or the way you light up when you’re discussing it with him. You used to spend way too much time talking with your friends about this stupid crap. Now you talk to him. Who gives a shit about whatever mindless little thing you’re watching. What David enjoys is your undivided attention. 
Jason Dean/JD - JD also sees this as a bonding activity and bid for connection… However, JD is a born hater. He bonds by talking shit. He’s not necessarily trying to be a bummer about the things you enjoy. He’s just a certified yapper when it comes to shit-talking. If he thinks something is stupid he just can’t sit in silence. This is his most underdeveloped life skill. He’s got ten minutes of quiet in him max. If he does manage to bite his tongue his face gives him away anyways. So what was the point? Will say something pretentious like: “Why are we watching people play out a badly scripted version of their lives through a screen when we could be out living ours, right now? Let’s hop on my bike and just ride, darling! Live a little!” Sir, I just worked an eight hour shift. I need to see someone who doesn’t deserve a rose get sent home in tears. Read the room. Get a grip. 
❥ who is pissed off/devastated when you watch it without them ❥
Sebastian Valmont - What can he say? Sebastian likes to watch people experience psychological torment. He’s trying to turn on the first seasons of “America’s Next Top Model" and watch a girl get sent home in tears after the judges convinced her to shave her head bald to look more fierce.This is the type of quality reality TV that makes Sebastian laugh. Watching people go through their darkest moments in front of a camera that highlights the creases in their cheap makeup is how he likes to spend the occasional date night. You had to put him onto reality tv shows, but now he’s hooked. He probably watches more reality TV than you do. If we’re being honest. You think this might be how he gets to still live out his glory days of being an unrepentant asshole. Sometimes he sighs a little too wistfully when someone is being a monster. 
Jordan Li - Jordan enjoys anything you do together. Even if they hate a particular activity, at least they’re spending time with you. Still, there are reality TV shows that Jordan really likes, such as: home improvement shows, “Say Yes to the Dress'', “Face Off”, “American Ninja Warrior”, and “RuPaul's Drag Race”. And then there are shows that Jordan puts on a brave face about. Things like “Love Island” and “Jersey Shore”. Jordan gets queasy just scrolling past them. There was a time before they became one of Brink’s favorites that their parents kept pushing them to try and be an entertainment Supe. No one is taking you that seriously, anyways! Maybe you’ll do better in the reality TV circuit. It’s unlikely Jordan will ever get stuck in projects like that now. They’ve proven they can be a heavy hitter. Proven that they’re strong enough to not need to sell themselves as cheap, easily-digestible, entertainment. Still, they don’t like thinking of the alternate world where they’re having to sit in front of a camera and do twenty retakes of “authentic” confessional room venting.
Stu Macher - He likes reality TV and doesn’t care who knows. Hooray! A shared interest… except watching these shows with him will piss you the fuck off. He has dog-shit opinions about everything. You will never be rooting for the same people. You will never agree on who handled a situation better. He’s always rooting for the asshole, it seems. You don’t even think he’s doing it to be contrary or to make you mad. He’s genuinely on their side (most of the time… he does enjoy making you mad.) Watching reality TV with Stu makes you want to kill him. It also makes you look at him funny. Why are you always siding with the bastards? You don’t think Ekin-Su needed to apologize? Stu, are you out of your fucking mind?
Josh Washington - You’re gonna try to tell me that the twins weren’t making him paint toenails while they pulled all nighters of “The Bachelor”? Sure, okay, if you’d like to believe that. And his inner circle consists of Emily and Jess? Please. He’s been watching trashy TV for years. He’s watched a little of everything. He is so well acquainted with the dark underbelly of reality TV that it would roll over for a tummy rub from him. It knows his scent. He can easily keep track of the names, faces, and plots. Who’s fucking who. Who hates who. Who’s forming secret alliances. You’ll probably be more lost than Josh ever gets. He’s a day one. He’s an OG. 
❥ who is pissed off to even be hearing about it second-hand ❥
Sparrow!Ben Hargreeves - He has better shit to do than watch reality TV show crap all day, and so do you. These are the kinds of harsh words that will be waiting for you if you try and get him to watch anything fun with you. Ask him one too many times and, like a parent who is annoyed that you are bothering him, he will begin to fill up any moment of free time the two of you have with activities. No, babe, we can’t watch “90 Day Fiance.” Why? Because we’ve got to run the marathon for kids with cancer and then we’ve got dinner with the mayor after that. You two are gonna be booked and busy. You were obviously bored. Now you won’t have time to even think!
Kevin Khatchadourian - Please don’t remind him so blatantly of his own intellectual superiority over you (he’s an asshole.) He gets the ick of the century when you try and tell him what happened during one of your little…programs. If you have the audacity to take it a step further and ask him to watch with you? He’s rendered speechless. Since when is this relationship a safe space? He doesn’t enjoy well-written, heart-stopping, incredible genre-defining movies and television. And yet, somehow, you’re so delusional you think he’s gonna sit through reality television with you? Don’t piss him off. He doesn’t even bother responding. Enjoy the view of his back as he walks away!
❥ secret fourth worse thing ❥
Nathan Prescott - Nathan is once again in a category of his own, which you might call: too nosy to not get into it, but doesn't want you to know he enjoys it. He made fun of you when you first started to watch reality TV. He can’t go back on his word now. If you were cuddling on the couch he’d have his face turned into your stomach and dramatically roll his eyes at your absentminded head rubbing. Could we focus on what’s important please? But then the plots started thickening and the heated exchanges started to pique his interest. He knew he was cooked when he started recognizing names, who was booed up with who… wait that disloyal prick hooked up with who this week?! He tells you to just replay the episode because you’re explaining it shitty and you obviously want him to watch it and talk to you about it. It isn’t for his benefit at all. Turn the subtitles on, god dammit.
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A/N: this was really fun! how did you know i've been watching reality TV shows lately?? if you enjoyed these headcanons consider reblogging, leaving a reply, or an anon! a writers fuel is engagement. xoxoxo
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revelboo · 20 hours ago
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couldge we get some nsfw tfa bulkhead crumbs, maybe? 👉👈
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Rolling these into one scenarios post cause I’m over 100 asks again already 🤣
More Assorted Scenarios 🌶️
18+ Mass displaced mechs 🌶️
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The mechs do have both, but can shift the plating protecting their ‘bits’ independently. If one of their humans is actively exploring down there, they’ll figure it out. Though Knockout and Breakdown, Tailgate and Cyclonus, and Chromedome and Rewind’s humans are going to figure it out very quickly. Some mechs would be down for letting their human play with whatever they want (Swerve, Skywarp, or Bluestreak, though he’d be absolutely mortified about it and an awkward mess the first several times), while others would require some coaxing (TFP Megatron)
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TFA Bulkhead
• “This okay?” He asks, servos grazing your hips in a barely there touch. ‘Bulkhead, please,’ you whisper, hips up. Can feel the head of his spike slide against your inner thigh, branding you with heat before he’s gripping himself and pressing inside you. “You’re sure about this?” His insecurity normally adorable, but right now it’s just frustrating. And you push back against him, sucking in a breath at the faint burn of his spike stretching you, sliding deep. “Slow down.” One of his massive hands slams down beside you, servos clawing the concrete floor.
• Groaning, his hips jerk against you and you brace yourself when he begins to move. Wanted to take it slow this time, but as you make those sounds and push back to meet his thrusts, and he loses control. Servos gauging into the concrete on either side of you as he thrusts inside your wet heat. Afraid to touch you in case he accidentally gets too rough, because even mass displaced, you’re so small. Gripping his spike so tight. With everyone sharing the same space, he’s trying to keep quiet as he claims you, but you’re not making any effort at all, crying out for him. Encouraging him. Sari and Bee are at least out at a drive in movie you’d brought Sari a ticket for.
Skywarp
• “Primus, wait,” he groans, hips lifting as you run your fingertips along his inner thigh, tracing seams and dipping to stroke sensitive mesh. “Wait.” Ignoring him, you run the pad of your thumb over his plating. Know this one shifts to free his spike, and teasing the bottom edge of it with a fingernail has him making that sound suspiciously like a whimper that you love. He’d promised to behave. Keep his hands to himself and let you explore him. On your knees between his spread thighs, you press your mouth against his plating and he starts swearing, voice cracking as he swaps to his own language.
• You’re trying to offline him. Tip of your tongue sliding against the seams of his plating. Fingers touching and dipping to find mesh. And groaning, head back, he lifts his hips and shifts his plating to free his aching spike. Not even aware that he’s shifted all of his plating until you make a noise and touch him. And he’s arching again as those warm fingers cautiously stroke along the inner edge of his valve. “I won’t lose a finger if I touch you here, right?” You ask and he’s begging you to please touch him, aware that it’s a broken mix of your language and his, but you get what he wants. And one of your hands is gripping his spike, mouth sliding along the length of him as you press your thumb inside him, exploring. And you are trying to offline him, warm mouth moving against the head of his spike as you stroke inside him.
Hound
• Fingers fisting in the grass over your head, you’re momentarily dazzled as a cloud slides away from the sun. Tossing your head back, you can’t even care that you’re going to have leaves in your hair as his mouth slides against you, glossa tunneling inside you again and again. And you grab onto his helm, hips bucking on a breathless cry as you come apart, his head lifting, mouth pressing against your hip. Before encouraging you onto your hands and knees and shifting to cover you. Rutting against you with a growl as birds sing in the trees.
Trailbreaker
• Mouth brushing yours, your jaw, your neck, anywhere he can reach, Trailbreaker groans as you roll your hips. Tightening on his spike with a breathless cry, shuddering and going still before you’re moving again. Straddling his lap, riding his spike. Cupping your cheek as he tips your face up, you tighten on his spike, movements becoming more urgent. Mouth exploring yours, his other hand slides over your hip. Making up to you with gentle touches after your last argument. Wants to do better for you, cut back on the engex. He’s not had a real reason to try in so long, but he wants to for you. And you’re trembling around his spike, mouth opening against the corner of his mouth as you come apart. Servos threading through your hair, he groans and rides it out before rolling you under him, hips rocking urgently. Too close to make it last as long as he’d like and your thighs are trembling against him, mouth open. “I can’t, please, I can’t,” you’re moaning, head back as he drives you to that peak again. Fills you again.
Sunstreaker
• Mouth brushing your jaw as he shifts against your back, spike hard again like he hadn’t just fragged you until you were an incoherent, whimpering mess, he runs the tip of a servo over your bottom lip. And you make a little noise of protest when he lifts your thigh enough to bury himself inside you again, your head pressing back against him when you arch. “Sunny,” you whimper, using Sideswipe’s nickname for him and startling a laugh out of him at the way you tremble. Content to just let you warm his spike for now as his servos run lightly over you. Enjoying the quiet with his brother out on patrol, not having to take turns with you. Not having to share your attention. Able to really relax with you in his arms. Hips lazily rocking against you even though he’d intended to let you get some rest. Wondering what it would feel like if you touched his spark while he was thrusting inside you.
Sideswipe
• Laughing as he catches you around the waist and pulls you into his frame, mouth closing on your neck and denta biting down hard enough to sting, you gasp. Growling playfully when you smack him and he bends you over the little human sized berth he’d convinced Wheeljack you needed. You’ve never actually slept on it, but mass displaced, it puts you at the right height. Pleased you’re naked already even though he can scent Sunny on you. “You been fragging Sunny? Taking good care of him?” He growls, servos finding you and stroking until you’re bucking your hips as he splays his other hand against the middle of your back to keep you pinned. Driving two servos inside you and thrusting them lazily as he rocks himself against your hip. Until you whimper. Slipping his servos free to make you moan a protest before his spike is stretching you and he groans at how you feel wrapped around him. “Gonna be so good for him, aren’t you? Let Sunny spark you.” Hips pumping, his optics shutter. Losing himself in the feel of you, needing to remind himself that there’s a line he can’t cross. That you’re for Sunny. To help heal him and this is all he can have of you.
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euphoria-looney · 18 days ago
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This au makes my eyes watery, good job with the fic author🤩, this I can't help but be unsatisfied with the batfam, like imagine an au where (name) died brutally, like it was their birthday too. Ughhhhh pls author can you make this a fic???
👾🍑Anon
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"When our hands grew cold, we just froze up~... I'm closing my eyes right now, I'm rewinding you again." Rewind by Wonder Girls.
(sorry the title is so long. I'm in love with the song.)
So Much More.
Special
Divider creds: @dollywons and @aquazero
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“You made it just in time [name]” the salesgirl, Sherry, also business owner of the bakery cheered.
“Sorry, I know you have a date. I'll make this quick.”
The bakery was [name] 's favorite place since they had learned how to drive and even now when they have become famous, they make sure to drop by at least once a month making sure to give lots of cash into this place.
It held significance to them. Their comfort place.
Here they could do any assignments in peace, once when they were so nervous to play a piece at their concert Sherry had allowed them to practice at the cafe, it brought in a bunch of customers, and it gave them an ego boost certainly.
The glass cover that displayed all the sweets, Sherry, who would take in a personal request for cakes, whether that be a marriage cake, a gender reveal cake, or a birthday cake, she would do it.
Today would be a birthday cake.
The birthday person is getting it for themselves.
“Don’t fret that sugarplum. I wanted to stay just to give it to yah’ alrighty, here you go!” 
Handing over the cake that was in its plastic-designed box, it would be a surprise what the cake would look like and the flavor would be (f/f) Sherry knew them too well to make any other flavor.
“You didn’t bring anyone with you to keep you safe?”
I shook my head
“I wanted to celebrate it alone, not force my staff to celebrate it with me.” Sherry sighed, shaking her head.
“Well, I stayed behind to give you this cake and also say, happy birthday [name]” Sherry held her warm hands over their cold ones before letting them go.
“Thank you, Sherry.”
“Stay safe, [name]”
“You as well.”
Going on their phone they realized they had to run to the convenience store to grab some milk as they had run out of it the other day, and cake doesn’t taste as good without some milk, what they also didn’t expect was an armed robbery taking place at said grocery store.
It also didn’t help that Joker decided to attack not too far away.
Tonight would be a shit show.
They didn’t know what happened. One second they held their cake with one hand moving it so they could arrange where their grocery would go and the next thing they knew bullets lodged into them.
The cake splattered on the ground, comically, the top was intact with the words. 
“Happy Birthday, My Angel!” The top part is designed with frosted flowers. Then at the bottom part another message “The Spectacular [name]’s 23rd Birthday!!!”
‘Damn, Sherry did a good job with this one… it’s so pretty.’ [name] could only think in their head.
“Holy shit, you got them! Hurry, make sure they’re dead, and take the car, it's worth a good couple of bucks, no?” One of the robbers giggled and seemed feminine.
[name] could only stay on the ground feeling a leg kick their body flipping it over.
“Umm, just to be cautious, put a couple more in them.”
Three teens, two boys and one girl no older than 17(?) did said action.
Too bad they didn’t hit any major organs so [name] was left to bleed out, moderately fast, but still conscious.
They at least planned a will, it wasn’t something they imagined would happen.
Profits are split equally among their staff and handing over their business to Astro and Penny to cooperate. And they’re 100% sure nobody would want their dead body. And a bunch of donations to the Bakery, orphanages, shelters, and a personal share to Sherry.
“Hey, what’s with this car, fingerprint to start?!”
“Damn it, come on! Nightwing and Robin are coming over here!”
“I thought the Joker was distracting them!”
"We took too long, idiot! Crap the cops in front of us!”
“Put your hands in the air!”
“Search the area,” Nightwing told Robin.
“I was already doing that.” Robin sassed back.
“Holy shit! [name]?!” Nightwing spotted their body lying there.
“Hey! Hey! Stay with me!” He gently shook them.
“Stop that… you’ll make it worse.” They weakly shoved him, rasping out their words.
“What happened?!” Nightwing was afraid, afraid for his sibling, the one that had left the house 5 years ago, the sibling he’d never hang out with.
“You got to press on the wound to stop the bleeding…” They choked up before spitting out blood. It stuck on their chin, eyes slowly blinking.
They wanted to laugh. Maybe this is what frogs feel like blinking.
“I know that! Stop talking!” He squeezed them tighter, hoping to stop the blood by a bit. The sound and the pain made [name] wince though.
“Shit, I’m sorry, big brother is so sorry for yelling at you, I’m so sorry for everything, just hold on, please just hold on” 
[name] was going into a hysterical state at this moment. What are you sorry for? As a vigilante not being able to save a civilian? Or is it the years of neglect? 
“Did you find something?” Robin came over, only to be shocked himself.
“[name]-!”
“Don’t just stand there! Call for backup! Someone! Anyone!” Nightwing yelled.
“Don’t worry, I’m right here… I’ve got you.” Nightwing kept muttering to them, holding them close but… god, it wouldn’t stop flowing out. 
The blood.
“Hey, Dick?” That caught Nightwing- otherwise your big brother Dick off guard, you knew his identity?
“How-“
“I don’t wanna die…”
He froze suddenly feeling their body shake as their hot tear slipped out of their eye and onto his shoulder.
“Don’t say that, you won’t, I wouldn’t allow that…” 
Their sniffles were never-ending as they used whatever strength they had to grip his back.
“I want my mama…” they cried rubbing their head on his shoulder.
Dick could also feel tears well up in his eyes.
This isn’t how he thought he’d meet you again, but did he ever think he was going to meet you again?
He promised after this he’d never leave you alone.
All those years you’d chased after him why didn’t he try to also put in effort?
“… could you do me a favor?” They suddenly asked.
“Anything.” He answered immediately.
“Could you sing me happy birthday’?” They started taking short, shallow breaths.
Dick trembled before looking over to see the nicely decorated cake.
“Happy birthday to you~” he starts
“Happy birth-“ their hands start to drop.
“[name]!-“
“Keep going… keep going even when my hands drop, until you finish.” They clutch onto him, lower now, but they still gave him comfort even at this moment.
"Alright, alright." He nodded. "Don't think of anything, don't say anything, not even a word. Just give me a smile, " he asked in return.
They complied. Even in this abnormal situation they still wanted to celebrate their stupid birthday.
“Happy birthday, dear [name]~” he could hear himself hiccuping from crying.
“Happy birthday to you…”
“Again.” They demanded, little tears still coming out.
And like they commanded he obeyed, he kept singing to them even when their hand finally fell and their breathing stopped.
Even when they felt cold as a corpse.
He kept singing.
Hugging them tightly, no matter how limp they seem to be.
"Hey Dick, anything important tomorrow?" A small [name] appeared tugged on his shirt.
"Yeah sorry [name], Damian asked me to do something with him before you did, you understand right? You're older and Damian- he's been through a lot, hm?" Dick ruffled their hair.
"But it's-"
"Sorry, I have to leave now!" News broke out that another villain caused a ruckus in this city.
[name] could only rub their arm with their other arms, tears streaming down their face, as they could only sniffle.
"But... it's my Birthday..." They whispered to themselves seeing the retreating figure of Dick fade away.
It wasn’t even an argument that losing one of his children once was painful, so when Jason returned from the dead it only solidified his promise to himself that he’d never let another one of his kids perish.
It seemed he wasn’t the only one notified of what was occurring by Damian but everyone was.
When they showed up at the scene with medical equipment, it was too late.
Instead, stumbling into a Nightwing holding onto [name] 's corpse singing Happy Birthday to them.
At least they had a body to hold a funeral for this time around.
They ordered a glass coffin to preserve their body in.
Of course, out of common courtesy, they invited the people close to them.
The door to the reception slammed open.
(Why am I imagining the scenes in Miraculous with Adrien’s dead mom, ykw? Imagine [name]’s funeral exactly like that, the batfam are rich for a reason.)
“How dare you think you guys have any right near their body!?” In storms Penelope, and Astro also came in.
Penelope, a doctor at the highest medical institute known worldwide, approached the mourning family.
Astro had a cold look following behind.
Penelope took Bruce’s collar gripping onto him with pure rage.
“You guys want to play the part of the loving family now?! How about when they needed it?! Huh?!” 
Astro placed a bouquet below [name]’s coffin giving a prayer before putting a hand on Penelope's shoulder.
“That’s enough, pray respect to [name], there’s no point arguing with them. You should know but now with what [name] tells us, they’ve never cared.”
She scoffed before shoving Bruce away and patting herself off.
“That’s a lie! We did care for them.” [M/D] called after them right when they were walking out.
“Says the woman who kept pushing her delusional self onto [name], what? Were you trying to replace their real mother? Look at all that jewelry and that veil. Please, what is this fashion show for you?” Penny had to get held back by Astro.
“Show some respect! Be lucky we even invited you!” Damian retorted.
“Enough! This is a funeral, not your drama show.” Duke butted in, distressed by the situation, he didn’t know [name] too well but it’s not his fault… he didn’t even know you existed.
With that the silence ensued and everyone stayed to respect [name].
Here lies, [name], they did more than expected of anyone. From donating to building connections, there was so much more they could’ve done in their life. Wasted at the mere age of barely 23 years old.
Isn’t funny they died on the one day they were always alone on their birthday? Now everyone was there. Not to celebrate though.
May they rest in peace,
[name] [last name].
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Penelope is 067 in my crossover fic and y'all know Astro and Sherry are the shopkeepers as well so yeah they exist in this au.
Halfway through I realized that I hadn't introduced Penelope in the other fic so... oops.
Also if the ending seems rushed or ass, don't mind it. ❤
Anyway hopefully the person who wrote this request sees this and everyone else too but just in case here is the taglist and anon 👾🍑, I hope you see this!
@cozmie @nxdxsworld @overcaffeinatedfreak @strwberryglass @leiiasurez @randomlyappearingartist @sirenetheblogger @a-lurking-fae @darktrashpoetry @frankie-moon3 @mynameisnotlaura @blackcat2270
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