#asspoking

[klinefelterrible]

I almost got Haldir and I would fucking marry the guy or at least fuck him senselessly but since I didn't and got some fucking Gwaihir

A. Fucking. Eagle.

I would rather marry the eagle than fuck him (do birds have dicks? I don't think so. Would I kill him? No way) so let me spin around this bullshit again okay

Meriadoc Merry Brandybuck. It can go either way, we can fuck and then marry or just fuck. He could fuck me.

Let's spin the wheel once more. Imrahil. I don't remember him. A quick google check out and yes, we could be fucking. I assume he wished that and I'm fine with us doing nasty stuff behind the barn or in his bed.

Once again. It slipped from Arwen and Aragorn to some buttwitt asspoke so I spun the wheel around once more without even reading it and fuck yeah it got me Sauron so guess who gets fucked in the ass by a giant evil lord of darkness and his twenty four eel-like dicks? I even got myself a lace lingerie for that occasion.

Ah yes, a fucking Grima Wormtongue. Guess what this Wormtongue can do to my Pinkhole. Once again, shall we?

Okay it slipped from Gollum to Gorbag and we have our first kill to stop me from fucking everyone.

Thanks for playing with me with this stupid game of daydream about fucking random characters from Lord of The Rings.

Before voting, spin the wheel and get a Lord of the Rings character.

Not sure who your character is? You can look them up on this Tolkien Gateway character list, or just vote based on vibes.

For the purposes of the game, assume your vote is not "LaCE compliant." (That is, fucking an elf does not instantly mean marriage or death for that elf.)

Poll concept from @pollsnatural.

[shredsandpatches]

I HATE THOSE PAIRINGS. But ... wth. Hit me with your Lord Byron.

(Byron is a book you threw at a wall.)

I didn’t physically throw it at a wall, because I was in a bookstore, but I did (literally) drop Sara Douglass’ The Wounded Hawk like a hot potato thanks to her depiction of Richard II as an Evil Gay Person who rapes random women with his Even More Evil Boyfriend for shits and giggles, and gets killed by ass-pokering which is described in loving detail for three pages while the narrative voice snickers because Richard failed to take his excruciating and unhistorical* death like a man, or something.

…sorry, that was gross, I know. Definitely not an experience I’d recommend.

*it’s explicitly a fantasy AU, to be fair, but still, ugh.

[444names]

herbs common names + hindu deities + hobbies + home appliances + horses

Addravers Affrice Agarting Agnet Aick Aingphing Ajanis Aling Aller Aming Amma Ampates Anes Anowato Antinsur Antrahe Arancing Aranya Arat Arconar Ardputha Arkenna Arow Arrihari Asilli Asing Asirmy Assem Assiving Asspoking Asta Astory Bahan Bali Baling Balipso Balkalque Ballat Balliter Ballying Bamanna Bang Basti Bating Behinet Bhandan Bhureele Bigeoping Bilhun Birefly Blahankas Blaming Blans Blen Bler Blesha Blucyu Blueed Boaster Bodso Bodsocio Boleireen Boloas Boxmali Brang Bratagni Buck Budannit Buie Burvay Calecting Camnars Cana Catchas Cate Caterbi Chabiarag Chea Chell Cher Chickcal China Chip Chirming Chisson Chvid Cicriens Cing Citings Claros Cleffda Cler Clerriegy Cling Cloar Coldi Coll Colla Colot Colove Coot Coping Cornswati Corting Croquing Cull Curey Curs Daket Dane Danes Danovenzi Darayaser Darbowing Darinhing Dayana Deoper Dhaldball Dhans Dhavoling Dianya Ding Dising Doll Domy Dragnires Drahamji Drfra Drult Elagoort Emar Emoni Equing Essorting Faaing Fanya Fasseed Fava Fendhing Fiel Figamping Filhes Firava Firs Fishin Flace Flocine Floggic Flor Foomy Fundon Futhy Galaking Galinx Gandevid Garnist Gatonda Geri Glowark Goer Golls Gologari Golti Gookely Gooodet Goozlime Gradmy Gran Grawn Guacker Guasires Hapepre Havayine Heriany Hing Hingara Hisea Hobalooke Hofwing Housky Hrocolott Huary Huben Hurreati Huttleet Hyss Icalings Icaya Irahun Irlisess Ising Jayer Jaytraf Jhuarace Jimpan Joheading Jugben Jund Juntu Jusk Jyogy Kabing Kable Kalkin Kamet Kando Kater Katriania Kenzi Kerbint Khishwar Kinging Kishes Kithrida Knierts Lacing Lamana Lamman Lanu Larbyni Lard Leambiran Lestaya Lewrick Lind Ling Logy Loncill Lowmane Mahate Makater Maker Makysper Mandaksh Mandeviso Manding Mandis Manditaek Manis Manyard Maramaher Marliati Masopy Ming Miting Mity Mong Mooootti Moopper Muke Muker Mukhomat Mukyssunt Munder Muser Myman Myrti Nasrully Nese Ning Nipperts Nishymna Nompe Nortie Oing Oldorse Ollecti Oloooh Oltibars Orgres Pacra Pacy Padi Palages Palwer Pang Pary Patarult Pazot Peerbleft Pendth Perser Pham Phymell Pole Poly Porking Porocing Pory Powalarb Powimak Powlini Prackregy Prectify Preer Preving Puresunda Quall Quilacar Quitefry Raba Rabalking Rabang Rabider Raceli Rahjogsan Rakantid Ramittati Ramnang Rapt Raskyle Rater Rayyara Rbeass Rbigh Reabissil Rest Rethy Riatebper Ridnigh Ring Riticha Ritinva Roll Ronomse Rousha Rowmaning Rudduka Rugglying Rughtlet Runstecti Sadift Saire Sairea Sami Sang Santrower Savairen Savive Sawn Scolla Scuithilt Sculepre Scuum Seash Sebsu Seed Semet Serang Shmaker Shtbala Shway Shyall Shyamanii Sing Sking Slas Slie Sming Smirs Snomser Sper Squees Stard Sterbeard Sting Stleri Stoapice Stong Surging Svang Swas Swer Taeker Taiking Talacti Tamat Tanell Tardrap Teati Teniang Thing Ting Toarame Tomy Tonbra Tonce Toni Tonji Tord Toryen Towiroara Tray Treen Tria Triccoll Trock Troorti Turya Twat Twing Ughtly Umiyan Urfing Urhang Vackemer Vacking Vagermcan Vantba Vardarue Vasainess Vashicse Vaswince Velding Vild Viscand Viso Vock Volectine Voloven Volowimma Vored Vori Vorser Wakint Warundeed Wataing Watawarb Wati Wave Wayaping Wayya Werga Wiles Wing Wini Winirong Wort Wrider Xterspor Yamilogy Yang Yara Zull

[brownbunniesblog]

[brownbunniesblog]