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magmagicstyle · 4 years ago

Text

DON’T START NOW

*HURT/COMFORT*

Pairings: Bruce Wayne x male!reader, Clark Kent x male!reader

The reader and Bruce used to date until he messed up. Not being able to handle the idea of being in the same city as the millionaire, the reader goes away. Luckily for him, in his new city, there’s a nice and a bit nerdy journalist ready to make his heart flutter again.

A/N: Hey! It’s been awhile… the only thing I can say to justify me: college is hard, kids…

If you don't wanna see me

You really thought that the relationship was going to last until you both were old and you could see the children have kids and that the kids would call you grandpa. Of course, reality proved you wrong at the moment you saw him fucking Selina Kyle in the bed that was supposed to be yours and his. Her moans and cries of pleasure were quite irritating, the way he grunted and moved against her body while she made noises that made her sound like a cat in heat was so disgusting for you, it made you feel sick. The worst part wasn’t the fact that it was your first anniversary, it wasn’t the fact that he was doing this in your bed, in the bed where you laid with him a lot of times and just whispered “I love you” while he smiled and whispered “I love you” in response. No, that wasn’t the worst part, the worst part of being cheated on, was that you knew that this wasn’t the first time and that he was saying “I love you” towards her.

Did a full 180, crazy

Thinking 'bout the way I was

Did the heartbreak change me? Maybe

But look at where I ended up

I'm all good already

So moved on, it's scary

I'm not where you left me at all, so

If you don't wanna see me dancing with somebody

If you wanna believe that anything could stop me

“Well, it seems that I’m not needed.” You said quite loudly while you entered the room and closed the door behind you. Your face was stone cold while you looked at the bastard that had the nerve to cheat on you and at the bitch that called herself your best friend.

Bruce's face was a poem, surprise, embarrassment, maybe a little bit of guilt, but… was it guilt for cheating on you with the woman who called herself your friend? Or was it guilt that came for being caught in the act? Selina looked scared, guilty, even sad; at that moment you didn’t care enough about her. If she was going to feel guilty, she shouldn’t have fuck your fiance in the first place.

You opened the closet and grabbed two suitcases. They were Bruce’ suitcases but, to be honest, he had more than enough money, so he could buy more if he wanted to do it and well, you deserved to take something after being treated like a fool. You put them on the floor and opened them, then you started to grab your clothes and put them inside the suitcases. After you finished you grabbed a backpack and started pulling your jewels, electronics and important things that were inside the bathroom or around the room.

“(Y/N)...” Bruce said, he was sitting in the bed, a sheet was carefully hanging around his waist and Selina had another sheet around her naked body.

“Don’t worry, I will leave and you will do whatever you want, Brucie…” you said coldly, making fun of the stupid nickname his lovers had used before he started to date you. After all, you knew that he hated that nickname, it made him feel shallow and like an idiot, but if he was going to act like it, he deserved to be called by that nickname.

“Goddammit, (Y/N), I didn’t mean this to happen, not like this…” He said while standing up and grabbing your shoulder to turn you around.

That sentence and his touch combined made you snap. You were trying to be cold, trying to end this quickly because this way, you thought, it wouldn’t hurt as much as it did. You tried to ignore the crushing pain that you were feeling over your heart being broken in a thousand pieces. You were trying so hard while you picked up the things that only helped you to remember about the times when you thought you two were happy and in love. You tried so hard but he wasn’t making this easy, he was going and acting like it was nothing. Like he didn’t just destroy your life together because he decided to think with his cock. You tried but you couldn’t accept him acting like this was nothing. So you turned around and looked at him with eyes full of pain, hate and tears pouring from them.

“And how did you expect this to happen? Tell me, Bruce. In which way did you expect me to find out about you fucking the whore that I thought was my friend? Enlighten me, Bruce, because I have no idea.” You said, while your voice was sounding so bitter and crushed.

“Do not call her a whore” He said, jaw locked and frown in his face. Of course, Bruce the hero to the rescue, you thought feeling even more hurt (if that was even possible). Of course, he was acting like you calling Selina a whore was the biggest sin in the world like he didn’t decide to throw away all your time together just for a nice fuck.

“Oh, sure, because you love her, I forgot about that detail, right Bruce? Because you fucking love her, and I’m here, like an idiot thinking that you still loved me!” You yelled, slapping his hand away, making him look so shocked by your reaction. But let’s be honest, what did he expect? Did he think that you would just laugh this off and call it a day? Of course not, you were hurt, and you weren’t willing to stay with him anymore, so you turned around again and grabbed the rest of your things.

“(Y/N)... I…” Selina tried to call you, to tell you whatever excuse was in her mind but you stopped her by turning and looking at her with pure hate in your eyes.

“Shut up, you fucking bitch... what? You didn’t want this to happen, right? You couldn’t help yourself, right? Don’t fucking look at my face and lie to me” You finished saying this and turned around closing your suitcases and standing them up so you could easily grab them and leave the place.

“(Y/N)! Stop, I won’t let you talk to her this way.” Bruce said, clearly angry at you, but you didn’t care, you were hurt, he hurt you and he didn’t care about it, he only cared about his lover.

“Oh, boo hoo, so sad, Brucie is angry at me for insulting his whore, what am I going to do? Let me think...” you said while moving and putting your hand under your chin, pretending to think for a few seconds while you faced him. Suddenly, the ring on your left hand shined and made you notice it, almost like a divine sight.

“Now I know! I’ll fucking leave.” You said and took off the engagement ring. Then you threw the ring towards Selina and grabbed your suitcases, turning around one last time and walking towards the door of the bedroom.

“Have fun with your boyfriend, Selina, well, of course, until he cheats on you with one of your friends… wait, you don’t have friends so you will be fine, right?” You said and walked until you were outside of that hellish mansion.

“Master (Y/N)!” You heard Alfred yell and walk towards you. He looked quite regretful and sad, and even if you wanted to be able to lash out to him, to ask and yell at him for not telling you or not keeping Bruce under control. Even if you wanted to be able to blame someone else besides the man that you thought loved you. You knew that you couldn’t blame him for not being able to control every step Bruce took.

“Alfred… tell the kids that if they want to, they can call me any time… and also, if you need me to play chess, have some tea and talk, call me.” You said with a sad smile on your face and hugged the man. Alfred hugged you back and just let out a deep sigh, then he gave you the keys of one of Bruce’s cars.

“Alfred?” you asked confused.

“A car cannot replace a broken heart, but it can be useful to pursue a new life and also, Master Bruce deserves a little punishment for acting like a dumb teenager.” He said and helped you put the suitcases in the trunk of the car.

“Goodbye, Alfred.” You said with a soft chuckle.

“Goodbye, Master (Y/N)”

At that moment you hoped on the car and started to drive, you didn’t know your destiny but you just knew that you didn’t want to be anywhere close to Bruce and Selina.

Don't show up, don't come out

Don't start caring about me now

Walk away, you know how

Don't start caring about me now

Aren't you the guy who tried to

Hurt me with the word "goodbye"?

Though it took some time to survive you

I'm better on the other side

I'm all good already

So moved on, it's scary

I'm not where you left me at all, so

You were in Metropolis. After what happened, obviously, the media of Gotham started to talk about the hot news and “the dazzling couple” of the moment. Some people thought that Bruce was an asshole for dating a woman just after your breakup, even talking about how the breakup was probably due Bruce being a playboy unable to keep it in his pants. Other people supported his choices and thought that it was a good thing that Bruce stopped acting so, like they said, “delicate”, obviously wanting to say gay. The other group didn’t care enough about the topic. But even if some people supported you, every newspaper, magazine, or tv was talking about the new couple, about how good they looked together and just stuff like that, and if you had to be honest, you weren’t comfortable with the idea of seeing your ex and his lover in every part of the city,

So you left. You left Bruce's car with Dick and then bought a plane ticket and just flew to the nearest city that you could think of, and that was Metropolis. You started to get more modelling work there and decided to concentrate more in your career since you couldn’t do that while dating Bruce. Then you just started to get invited to different parties. So, in hopes of forgetting about Wayne and Kyle, you kept going to the parties, drank different things, and even tried some drugs, always being careful so you wouldn’t end up being addicted to something. You danced around with other celebrities, and the Metropolis’ newspapers that also talked about Bruce and Selina at first, started to talk about you and how you became a party spirit after being “freed” from Bruce’s claws.

The media in Metropolis stopped portraying Bruce as a guy who was freed from you, and started to see you as a model who gained his freedom and his humour back after being cheated on (yes, the rumors about Bruce’s affair became so strong that now all the media commented about it like it was a fact, which it was, but nobody had real evidence besides you and the couple). Some girls took you as an example of self-love and improvement after a bad relationship and in general, after a bad period of time. Obviously, this meant that you had more work as a model and that you even got invited to some tv shows. Your agent even told you that this was the perfect opportunity to publish some of the stories and novels that you had written a few years ago, so you did. Of course, this also was something that caught the newspaper’s attention, after all, they didn’t have the opportunity to talk about how the ex boyfriend of a millionaire was a model, writer, and one of the most liked persons in the whole city. This helped you to get your head off Selina and Bruce and just helped you to get better in general, so you kept going to different shows, took more work, published more stories and just enjoyed your time in this new city.

This didn’t mean that you had forgotten everything about your life in Gotham, the kids called you from time to time, to know about you, to see if someday they could travel and visit you or to just hear your voice once more. And, to be honest, you were so glad that they didn’t forget about you after your breakup with Bruce, even Alfred called you from time to time, to see if you were planning to go back to Gotham so you and he could have a nice play of chess. But, every time you answered that even if you were feeling better and you were doing just fine in Metropolis, you weren’t sure if you wanted to go back to Gotham, not even for a visit. Still, after saying this, you told him that no matter what he could go to Metropolis to see you with the kids and that your house’s door would always be opened for them.

As soon as you offered that, they accepted it so from time to time, the kids or Alfred, or even the whole group came around to spend time with you. Of course, you loved to go to parties with the older ones and go to amusement parks with the young boys, but one of the best things was having movie nights together. Just cuddling in the couch of your living room, while enjoying some tasty and healthy (you are fun but also need to take care of your shape to maintain your career) snacks. They didn’t talk about their father and the last thing you knew from them about him was that they had fought over his stupidity. Usually you would act like the peacemaker between them but that wasn’t your job anymore and if you had to be honest, you weren’t interested in working for Bruce again.

If you don't wanna see me dancing with somebody

If you wanna believe that anything could stop me

(Don't, don't, don't)

Don't show up, don't come out

Don't start caring about me now

Walk away, you know how

Don't start caring about me now ('Bout me now, 'bout me)

You met him at one of your parties. A few months prior you started to host parties and not only attend them like you were doing before. After all, hosting parties was a good opportunity to meet more people that worked in the same field as you and that could help you get more gigs or other types of opportunities. This was one of the most “open to the public” types of parties, some people from the media, famous models, actors, singers, or just the socialites of Metropolis.

When you saw him, the first thing you thought was that he looked quite charming, handsome and even a bit sexy. Even if, when you saw him, it was just after he was being dumped by a black-haired woman, that you supposed was his (now) ex-girlfriend, in a gorgeous dress; he looked quite charming. In fact, if you had to be honest with yourself, the sight of him being all confused and almost looking like a sad puppy, was quite adorable. So, not wanting to see this handsome and cute man sad anymore, you made your way towards him, grabbing two glasses of wine on your way and just thinking about what you could do to make him smile again, knowing that he probably had the most beautiful smile ever. While you walked towards him, you had to give your greetings to different people that were dancing or drinking around the place. Some of them looked at you with envy and others with desire, it didn’t matter, you only had had for the blue eyed beauty.

“Hey there, mister…” You said with a little smile on your face while you stopped in front of him, offering one glass to the black haired man and hoping that he was kind enough to tell you his name.

“Kent, Clark Kent…” He said, while grabbing the glass and looking a little bit awkward. His reaction made you think that maybe he was quite shy around strangers, or maybe being in a party like this wasn’t exactly his scene. Well, you couldn’t blame him, parties weren’t your scene before you started to go to more of them.

If you had to be honest, he really looked like a lost puppy. This fact was making you want to cuddle him and protect him from the psychos (and probably, ex-girlfriends) that lived in this world (luckily for you, most of the psychos lived in Gotham). In fact, you actually cooed towards him and showed him a delicate and caring smile, making him blush softly, and give you a little but nervous smile. You were right, even this type of smile from him, was so gorgeous.

“I’m (Y/N), nice to meet you, Mr Kent,” You said and raised your glass making a little toast. “For our meeting” You finished with a smile on your face and a soft gleam in your eyes, looking quite happy.

“Oh, sure…” He said, also raising his glass. “Wait… (Y/N)? Like the model?” He looked at you directly with a surprised expression on his face.

“The one and only.” You answered with a smirk, loving the fact that he wasn’t polite or kind when you talked to him first because he knew who you were but mostly because that was the way he was. You were done with all the fake people around you that only cared about your new fame and your reputation.

“It’s so good to meet you, thank you so much for the invitation.” He said with a big smile on his face and a soft but amusing gleam on his eyes. Alright, you had to admit that his smile made your heart skip a beat and well, maybe he wasn’t only a shy puppy like you thought at first. “To be honest, in my work we’ve been trying to get an interview with you for a while… but as you obviously know, you seem to be quite busy.” He said with a soft but deep chuckle, and lord, what a nice and deep voice he had.

“Well, if you are so thankful and want to have an interview… I could use some company,” you said with a little and sly smile while putting your hand on his arm and trying to hide the soft gasp that wanted to escape from your lips when you felt his hard muscles under your touch.

“It would be my pleasure.” He answered you with a smile and offered his arm for you to hang from him, his smile turning into a playful smirk while he noticed your surprise thanks to his body, feeling the sudden need to know you better, to talk to you and maybe, just maybe, to kiss you.

You gave him a little but honest smile. Your eyes shone with the expectations of meeting someone that seemed as interesting as Clark. Inevitably your mind started to wonder about the fact that maybe Clark wasn’t a puppy but a nice wolf ready to play with you if you asked for it. That only thought turned your little smile into a playful one, and in that moment you thought that maybe this party was going to be more promising than what you thought at first.

Up, up

Don't come out, out, out

Don't show up, up, up

Don't start now (Oh)

Up, up

Don't come out, out

I'm not where you left me at all, so

“Babe… babe… baby… honey… love… bunny… Baby!” You said with a soft and a bit needy whine.

“Yes, hun?” Clark said with a small smile on his face, magnificent deep voice making you smile inevitably and since his dark-framed glasses were resting in the little nightstand, his gorgeous blue eyes were looking directly at you while his fingers caressed your cheek.

“Do you really have to go today? Can’t you just… stay here and rest with me? Maybe have some grown-up fun.” You said with a smirk that had the intention of being seductive.

Of course, calling sex as ‘grown-up fun’ made your boyfriend laugh softly. After all, with you, talking about just fun could be anything, sex, play a video game, run around your house with nerf guns or even, just lay on your bed while cuddling was fun for you. You were just like that, you didn’t need a lot of things or fancy stuff to be happy together and that was so special in your relationship. When you were together, you didn’t need to be the perfect model and the shy but smart journalist, you didn’t need to keep appearances or try to impress the people around you. Clark didn’t need to be the wonderful and perfect hero that he was in front of the citizens when he was showing himself as Superman and you didn’t need to act like a crazy party model, and that was just so perfect. Besides, Dick, Jason, Tim and even Damian loved him. You weren’t sure why they warmed up to him so quickly but you accepted it when they told you that you would know with time.

“I have to go… you know this mission is important and that the team needs me…” He said with a soft sigh, caressing your face and hair, getting closer to you so you were almost laying on top of him, since you were already cuddling.

“I can cuddle for a couple of minutes but then I have to fly…” He said with a relaxed smile, knowing that this was going to be enough to keep you happy for a couple of minutes before he had to go.

Clark hated the idea of leaving you. The idea of going away from home to fight some villain was quite awful for him, since it meant that he was going to leave you alone and unprotected. But he knew that he needed to be there, and he knew that deep down you understood him. After all, he really loved helping people and you were so proud of him because of that.

You knew that Clark was Superman. He had told you about it after you decided to make your relationship official. So, one of your date nights, while you were cuddling in your bed and watching a movie, he had confessed everything. Of course, at first it was hard to believe, almost thinking that he was making some weird type of joke, but after he explained more and showed you that he wasn’t joking, you began to understand different things about his behaviour and his weird explanations for the sudden “work trips”.

So, you were aware of his different fights and at some point you decided that you weren’t going to just stand there while he fought the bad men and got hurt from time to time. This meant that you decided to help him. Of course, when you told him that you were going to aid him he got quite mad. The idea of you putting yourself in danger just so you could help was something that he did not wish for. So, the fight between the two of you kept going until you talked about the things you thought you could do to help and he realised that you weren’t talking about fighting by his side, but to help him recover from injuries and to write some of the articles he had to do for his daily job. Eventually he accepted the idea and everything was alright again.

Just as he had promised, Clark stayed with you for a few minutes before flying away. You let out a soft sigh and sat down on the bed, knowing that even if your boyfriend was strong and probably more powerful than whoever villain he was going to fight, you couldn’t help but to get worried for his safety. After a few minutes -or half an hour, but who counted, right?- of you worrying for him, you decided to stand up and start to cook for the next day. You were planning to do something simple like a pie or a cake, after all, you wanted to be able to concentrate on the mail meal tomorrow and this was the best way to do so. Clark and you had planned a nice day so he could introduce you to the league and you thought that the best way to do it was to let you host the meeting. You wanted everything to be just perfect, after all, you knew that the league wasn’t only Clark’s colleagues, but also his friends, and you wanted to be accepted with them since the two of you were dating for almost a year.

If you don't wanna see me dancing with somebody

If you wanna believe that anything could stop me

Don't show up (Don't show up), don't come out (Don't come out)

Don't start caring about me now ('Bout me now)

Walk away (Walk away), you know how (You know how)

Don't start caring about me now (So)

Clark was by your side, his caring and big hands on your waist while you let your back lean on his chest. The two of you were standing in front of a mirror, and while Clark wasn’t wearing the glasses that kept his hero persona hidden, he was in civilian clothes. You were also wearing casual clothing, comforting yourself in his touch while you tried to relax and just avoid the nervousness that was creeping over your throat.

“Everything is going to be fine… they are going to love you, really” Clark said with a big and relaxed smile on his face, trying to calm you while he caressed your body over your clothes.

“Are you sure? Maybe what I cooked won’t be tasty enough… or maybe they hate the dessert… or... “ You started to ramble while leaning even closer to Clark. It was almost as if you were trying to hide under his touch.

“Stop, they are going to love you just as much as I do…” He stopped you in the middle of your rambling, leaving soft kisses on the side of your face and then pulled away, making you turn around so he could kiss your lips briefly.

You were about to stand up on your toes so you could kiss him again but you stopped when you heard the doorbell ringing. You knew that this sound meant that the league was already on your doorstep, you weren’t sure who would be the first to arrive but you decided that you couldn’t postpone this situation anymore. So you took a deep breath, kissed your boyfriend one more time and then started to walk towards the door of your house, involuntary smiling when you heard Clark’s footsteps right behind you.

In front of you were a couple of people that had kind smiles on their faces. Diana and Barry, like Clark had introduced them to you, were quite kind and easy to talk to. As soon as they arrived they commented about how wonderful your house looked and they talked about the food smell that promised a wonderful meal. Soon enough the four of you were talking and enjoying each other's company while you waited for the rest of the league to arrive. You were in the middle of a story when you heard the doorbell. Clark, being the sweet heart that he usually is with you, went to open the door while you stood up and started to pour more drinks to your visits and the new guests.

“Well, hun, apparently most of them decided to come at the same time…” Clark said with a chuckle while he entered the house with almost everyone from the league following him.

“Well, this means that we can start serving lunch, don’t you think, babe?” You turned around with a smile on your face. Smile that disappeared from your face and couldn’t help but gasp while showing your surprise when you saw, not only the kids, but Bruce walking behind your boyfriend. Bruce also looked surprised, and if you had not lost your power to be able to interpret his expressions, he looked a bit horrified.

“(y/n)?” He asked while looking directly at you, his eyes fixed in your figure standing a few steps away from him.

You knew you looked different, you knew that seeing you in this house, with a new boyfriend, looking so relaxed and happy wasn’t something he expected. You knew that he didn’t wish for you to be unhappy, but he probably thought that you wouldn’t be able to love somebody in a long time. Oh, he was quite wrong about that. But being totally honest, he didn’t have a right to judge you in any way. After all, the breakup was because he couldn’t keep it in his pants while being with that woman.

“You are Clark’s partner...?” He said after a few seconds.

You knew he couldn’t judge you in any way. You knew he didn’t deserve a thing from you after all what he did. You knew all of this. But still, you couldn’t help but shiver while looking at the man that with his affair, pushed you to go away from your city and leave the kids that you considered yours.

“Long time no see…” You finally said like an answer, while looking at the other man and walking closer to Clark. You man, noticing your reaction, walked the steps that were necessary until he was close enough to put his arm around your waist. It was clear. With this action, Clark was saying “back off”, he knew about your breakup, he wasn’t sure about the circumstances because the one time he asked you explained that you didn’t want to talk about it and he understood. But he knew that there was something wrong with the way you reacted towards Bruce and he wasn’t going to leave you by yourself while you were feeling insecure or bad about something.

“Why…?” You started to ask while looking at the man in front of you. He was wearing a simple shirt and pants, it wasn’t totally casual but if you thought about it, Bruce was never casual. Still, his attire didn’t explain why he was there like it was fine, like he didn’t enter a place full of superheroes.

“Wait… Are you Batman?” You finally asked while looking at the man with big and a bit surprised eyes.

Of course, when you were dating you had some suspicions. After all, the man tended to disappear in the middle of the night and then appeared like there was nothing happening. But at that moment, most of your thoughts were about him going to fix some problems in the office. After all, being the owner of a company as big as his wasn’t something easy. So when every time that you asked about him going away, he told you that he was working, you believed him. Certainly like a fool since he was lying to you straight to your face but, still, you believed in him.

After that train of thoughts you couldn’t help but think about your kids, and then about the young heroes that were with Batman from time to time, and as easy as adding two plus two, you had the whole picture in your mind. At that moment you were ready to yell at him, to explode with rage towards the man who endangered your children without even caring if you knew about it or not. Because yes, your relationship with Bruce was brief and quite rushed (biggest example; being engaged to the man after months of dating) but since the moment you met the kids you knew that they were your children and that you had to protect them. You were ready to scream with anger towards him but you stayed quiet, not really because you wanted to, but because at that exact moment Bruce had no better idea than to talk again..

“I know that you already made all the connections about it but yes, (y/n), I’m Batman… now, care to explain why you are dating Clark?” He asked looking at you like you’ve done something bad. Like he had the right to judge you and lecture you about your love life.

“Well, Bruce…” You started while putting your hand over Clark’s free hand, caressing the fingers that weren’t hugging your waist like he was ready to fly away at any moment.

“I don’t really have to explain anything to you, you know? In fact, I feel like I’m the one who needs an explanation, maybe about the fact that you are my ex-fiancé and I didn’t know about your little hero persona, or about how you decided to hid from me the fact that my kids are also heroes and that they are in danger every night without me knowing about it…” You said while looking at the man that surprisingly looked a bit nervous under your gaze, then you looked at the children who shifted nervously and looked a bit scared when you told them that the conversation with them was going to be later.

“(y/n), you are a civilian, if you knew about all the hero stuff, you would be in danger.” Bruce said in a tone that pretended to show him as calm and collected. But you knew him, at least, you knew this part of him. Bruce was scared, he was nervous because he didn’t even think about him being caught by you. Maybe he thought about you being so dumb that you never noticed the signs of him being Batman or maybe he just didn’t expect for you to discover him since you have broken up a while ago, in any case, it didn’t matter since you did discovered him.

“Yeah, try another thing buddy… also, me being in a relationship with Clark? Because yes, Bruce, we are in a relationship, it isn’t your concern, you are my ex fiancé, because you wanted to be my ex fiancé, you ruined our relationship and that made me walk away…” You made a pause while you looked how he seemed almost hurt by your words. Clark’s hold on you became a bit more tight, but he didn’t say anything, knowing that you needed to do this by yourself so you could be calm again. He was also quiet because he was really surprised by the whole situation. To be honest, the whole group that was around you (except your kids because they knew that their father was an asshole towards you and they knew how the whole relationship ended) was watching the interaction with surprise in their eyes. After all, it was surprising the idea of seeing someone snap at Bruce and even more surprising the fact that he seemed affected because of it.

“So, Bruce… I won’t be against you being here and enjoying a nice evening with the league, children and my boyfriend… But I won’t allow you to come to my house and to demand for an explanation that you don’t deserve… are we clear?” You finished talking while crossing your arms over your chest and looking directly at the man that you could finally say was nothing to you. For a few seconds, Bruce remained in silence, looking at you with a frown on his face. Confusion, anger and maybe a bit of regret were all over his face in an expression that you couldn’t fully interpret. He almost seemed conflicted, but when you thought that he was going to argue with you, he just let out a sigh and looked at you with a sad smile.

“Yes, (y/n), thank you for inviting us to yours and Clark’s home…” He said towards you before nodding and starting to walk inside your living room.

Soon enough, the children hugged you and after a few words of apology for keeping their secret identities from you, they walked inside the living room being followed by the rest of the league. All of them greeting you and complimenting the decorations of the house. The rest of the day was spent in the middle of conversations, eating food, you being complimented for your cooking skills, and fun stories that helped to clear the air between you and Bruce. You weren’t friends, you weren’t going to try to be friends, but at least you weren’t hostile towards one another and it was all thanks to the people around you.

When the sunlight started to disappear and the food was almost over, the members of the league considered you a new friend and they slowly started to go towards their houses. After talking with the children, you came to the agreement that they were going to stay with Clark and you for the weekend. Then, when almost everybody was gone, you stood while leaning on the door frame of your house, Bruce was in front of you, looking directly towards you with a smile on his face that didn’t reach his eyes. He wasn’t faking the smile, but you knew that like before, this smile was full of sadness.

“I lose you forever, right?” He asked softly, almost in a whisper and like a year ago, you remembered him whispering the same voice a quite adorable and caring ‘I love you…’

“Yes…” You answered and put your hand on his cheek, smiling towards him with the same sad and tired smile that you couldn’t help but to show him.

“Does he make you happy? Really happy?” He asked and you just closed your eyes while nodding before opening them again when you felt his hand caressing yours.

“I’m sorry for hurting you… It’s good that you are happy and I hope that we see each other again...” He said before pulling away and starting to walk towards his car before going inside and driving away.

You weren’t friends, you probably would never be friends again, and you knew that he was sorry, that he missed you. But you were sure that he knew that he lost you at the moment he even thought about cheating on you. He knew that you weren’t going to be back with him, and that being back in your life would be hard and painful for you and him. So he did what he thought was for the best and walked away. If some day you wanted to give him an opportunity to be friends, he would be grateful and take it, but he wasn’t going to show up again to try to win you back just so he ended up ruining everything. He wasn’t going to hurt you again if he could avoid it.

Up, up

Don't come out, out, out

Don't show up, up, up

Walk away, walk away (So)

Up, up

Don't come out, out, out

Don't show up, up, up

Walk away, walk away, oh

#batfam imagine #batman x male reader #superman #clark kent x male reader #bruce wayne x reader #bruce wayne x male reader #batman #batfam x male!reader #x male reader #x male!reader #dc comics x male reader #dc comics imagine #DC comics #clark kent imagine #bruce wayne imagine #don't come out

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onthevirgeofdestruction · 4 years ago

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35 Q’s for Fanfic Writers

From this post

I’m having a shitty, rude alter-y, crap night so I’m just going to answer all of these to distract myself and focus and to not bother anybody just making my own post and putting it under the cut btw, notice to anyone not aware: since I’m moving I won’t likely be updating anything until I’m done doing so.

1. From one to five stars, how would you rate your writing? (No downplaying yourself!) 3/5? Could use more editing and description and can be weirdly paced.

2. Why do you write fanfiction? Because it’s better than focusing on pain 24/7.

3. What do you think makes your writing stand out from other works? I don’t seem to have a specific narrative voice that people recognize but I’m pretty proud of mostly organic dialogue.

4. Are there any writers that inspire you? as a rule i never look up to anybody for inspiration but there’s some stuff in my ao3 bookmarks I fawn over.

5. What’s the fic you’re most proud of? Right now, none of them. It changes normally, anyway. If get too proud then I’d get my ass kicked by RSD if someone didn’t like it so it’s safer this way

6. What element of writing do you find comes easily? Dialogue.

7. What element of writing do you struggle with most? Organic description, poetic language kind of stuff. I can paint a scene but I’m not so great with bring out out a feeling with description alone.

8. Which character(s) do you find easiest to write? Janus and Virgil are probably tied. They both have things I struggle with but I don’t have to go back and do much adjusting of language and tone with them. Though admittedly my Virgil is signifigantly more foul-mouthed than canon and I tend to prefer pre-AA feral asshole Virgil.

9. Which character(s) do you find most difficult to write? Patton. I write him the least, so people can probably tell. I love Patton, I really do, but it’s so hard to keep away from fanon Patton.

10. What’s your favorite genre to write for? Angst w/ H/C obviously. Or if you’re talking about regular book genres, Fantasy. I fucking love fantasy world building.

11. Who or what do you find yourself writing about most? Trauma. I blame Daeram. As if Ayri isn’t a giant Angst Demon.

12. Tell us about a WIP you’re excited about. Slopes. I’m really into it. I’ve got three one shots running right now. Patrons can read the first part of the unnamed cat remus one, there’s also a coffeeshop au tropey nonsense one like eglantine & lycoris, but Slopes is addiction angst. Mmmmm. Virgil is addicted to coke and alcohol and will listening to his friends even be in time? Who knows, especially not me, but there’s already over 30k.

13. First fandom you ever wrote for? InuYasha. Or was it Harry Potter? Or shit, The Blue Sword? Fuck, I’ve been writing for a long time, I really have no idea.

14. What’s your favorite fandom to write for? Sanders Sides. The characters are the perfect dynamic for writing since they exist in balance of each other and the popular, easy to project on archetypes featured are incredibly fun to do basically any scenario with.

15. What’s the weirdest fandom you’ve ever written for? Weird storywise? Kingdom Hearts? I can’t even follow the plot anymore. Weird Fandomwise? Sanders Sides. Its simultainiously the fluffiest and angstiest nonsense at the same time.

16. Any guilty pleasure trope(s)? Vampires. Gay ones. Gay Vampires. I also love calm tol and angy smol.

17. A trope you’ll never, ever write for. Any tropes that normalize incredibly toxic behaviour or tropes that are inherantly ableist, but I can’t think of any.

18. Wildest fic you’ve ever written? Incorrigible continues to be complete nonsense.

19. Do you prefer canon-compliant, AUs, or something in-between? AUs. I mean closest I even have is canon-divergence other than a single short.

20. Gen fic or shippy stuff? I like it when there is gay nonsense along with a plot that is treated as more important than the relationship the most. But I like both. There’s more shippy stuff in tss so i read more shipping action by default.

21. Favorite pairing to write for? (platonic or romantic!) Anxceit/Sleepxiety, but in general, give me darksides or give me death/j

22. Do you listen to anything while you write? Almost everything I write has a special playlist I listen to to help me write it, but otherwise I listen to my Nyan playlist, an alter is picking the tunes, or a voidfam playlist. I never have music off. When my internet is down I just listen to the songs I own or Anxiety’s theme on loop.

23. Do you prefer prompts and challenges, or completely independent ideas? I’m fine with all of them. I love working with prompts but I tend to deviate. And I’ve never done a challenge since I can’t do deadlines and bad things happen bingo never sent me a card and I applied three times.

24. One-shots or multi-chaptered works? I am generally multi-chaptered stuff, but I’ve been working on a few one-shots lately that are much longer than most one shots.

25. Have you ever daydreamed about side adventures/spin-offs from your fic? Tell us about them! I was originally thinking of doing some little 13-year-old Dreaming!Roman (y’know, the one with a job) shorts but it turns out I just had an alter of that little bastard and that’s why I inexplicably know more about him then I ever even considered. I still might do them after Dreaming is done. But that’s paced so slowly who knows when that might happen. Otherwise I put stuff in my notes and just do shorts of it if I’m like “oh you know what’s cool???” but since I can’t daydream maybe this question doesn’t apply to me.

26. Is there anything you’ve wanted to write, but you’ve been too scared to try? I want to do more autism stuff, and I’ve had it demanded a few times, but I’m scared of being that explict about it for some reason. Possibly because I might be, possibly because I’m scared of doing it wrong even though I’ve accidentally coded multiple characters autistic. I’m scared of explictly tagging them as such, too.

27. What’s the nicest comment you’ve ever received? That I can remember off the top of my head? I’m going with one from @a-genz-with-trauma-and-kins. It really helped me out and was just so kind and literally the best christmas gift I got in 2020.

28. How well do you handle criticism when it comes to your writing? I can handle it alright but Daeram is a little fucking pissbaby about it. Constructive criticism helps people get better, so I appreciate it. I can’t handle critism that is incomplete, though. “i just don’t get it” or “I don’t know I don’t like it” kind of things. If I can’t understand the why to fix it then things get out of control. And then I spiral and RSD for like four days minimum. If it came from an anon or a troll, too, It might not bother me for as long. Things that are just like “this is shit and you should feel bad” just make me laugh. Couldn’t even bother to read it long enough to insult me proper? I don’t care.

29. Have you ever gone outside of your comfort zone for a fic? How did it turn out? I have a few times. Mostly in shorts and prompts, I think. I think they turned out okay. They’re not particularly inspired or anything.

30. Tooth-rotting fluff or merciless angst? Depends on my mood. Am I triggered? give me the fluff. Am I vibin? Angst.

31. Do you have any OCs? Tell us about them! Fuck, fam, no, I can’t, I have so many. I have multiple original stories and some of them have very large casts and like holy fuck. Or do you mean in Sanders Sides fandom? Um, Morgan and Thorn in PD. The lesbian and her himbo dynamic. I love them. They’re dorks. Morgan is strong person with sharp tongue and soft romantic heart and Thorn is just so kind and so dumb and so exciteable he’s like a puppy. They were just filler characters and I got attached to them. Felton even gets redemption for being an ass later in PD, like oof i never intended to include so much OC content, especially for names I just picked randomly.

32. Summarize a random fic of yours in 10 words or less. nope I’m doing all of them because these are fun plea for my new self: 2 gay vampires, 4 humans, 1 braincell dreaming while I wake: trauma child needs therapy and so do you break: big oof, oh dragons, oh why, go virgil go rebuild: virgil is so not okay there’s more virgil to deal painful death: gay teens drink themselves into a new religion stargazing: whoops we didn’t realize people actually cared whole castle: everyone will throw down for kid!patton, even you incorrigible: found family with a shot of psychological horror and crack dangerous instincts: wholesome crime syndacite action slopes: addict gets mugged and thinks that’s just fine with him conflagration: logan avoids everything ever like a champ cat!remus: bored fae shifts gay pining from one person to another caffeine cyptids: caffinated gay panic goes faster than regular gay panic eglantine & lycoris: more tropes than you can toss a shoe at storytime: overpowered virgil also overreacts literally always

33. Is there anything you wish your audience knew about your writing or writing process? an alter and I write together and I have absolutely no idea what’s going to happen, what I’m writing about, or even what year it is. I often don’t even remember what I wrote. There’s no outline. I have an idea and I pick things at random for it. There’s just notes and an evil gleam in a demon’s eye. The only reason I know more than readers is because I take a long time to edit and some of these stories have fucking alters up in my head who can tell me things. Daeram tells me nothing. The writing demon supposedly has all this knowledge but I have absolutely no clue because he does not talk to me, he just fronts and slams out 9k in a few hours or we cofront to write and I’m like “oh no she didn’t” while typing

34. Copy and paste an excerpt you’re particularly fond of. i’m fond of the entire painful death series and I tried to find something I really liked without spoilers in stargazing and I couldn’t so here’s a random thing from incorrigble: “So, what do you do with your friends?” Patton continued on with a megawatt smile. “Grand larceny,” Virgil deadpanned and glared at Patton, who was taken aback. Remy and Andy just broke out laughing while Virgil tentatively sipped his still-too-hot-cocoa.

35. Ramble about any fic-related thing you want! slopes my dudes slopes i have learned so much about cocaine! like wow! I thought for a minute it was going to end with MCD around 30k but it swtiched from whump to hurt/comfort and I still don’t know if it’s going to be MCD but look at that funky little coke/alcohol addict go, it’s a medical wonder he’s alive! It’s not like there’s what seems to be a little talked about interaction between alcohol and cocaine that causes a toxic chemical to build up in the liver which can result in liver failure and sudden death at basically any moment! Which is part of why it may result in MCD but this time no ghosts! maybe it’ll be h/c with whump elements or maybe it’ll be whump with h/c elements we can’t know for sure

#ayri writes #tw drug mention

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asherranceoftheheart · 5 years ago

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Icarus Falls - III - The Good Doctor Comes Home

Story Summary: “You’ll never leave me alone right?“ “You think I’d actually let you go?”

A story about the slow descent and corruption of a lonely man, a demon who learns that bonds go both ways, brothers who deeply regrets their words spoken out of anger, and a conflicted man watching them all fall down from the distance. Here’s a Puppet!Chase AU that was written with extreme self-indulgence so beware and read the tags before entering.

Chapter Summary: Chapter title says it all lol but also a breather chapter Pairing/s: None, Platonic Character/s: Jack McLoughlin, Chase Brody, Antisepticeye, Henrik Von Schneeplestein, Mentions of Other Septic Egos Genre: Angst, Fluff Chapter Warning/s: Self-Deprecating Thoughts (Thoughts like I’m not as good as the others, etc.), Sadness, extremely vague mentions of torture (Archive Of Our Own Edition) (Prev. Chapter)

Do you ever have one of those days when you wake up feeling both numb, and raw and sensitive on the inside and thinking ‘Ah. It’s one of those days…’ and wondering if it’s even worth the effort to open your eyes and move?

Chase felt emotionally and physically drained with a rocking throbbing headache as he woke up in a cold empty bed, tucked in like a child under the blankets. He stared up at the ceiling blankly, looking and thinking of nothing in particular until the memories began to come in crystal clear film in his mind. His hand twitched as he remembered the warmth of another person enveloping him even if that person had been his mortal enemy.

A part of him wanted to hate himself for missing, for yearning for the addicting affectionate touches that his enemy showered him with while he had been dreadfully sick. After all, had he become so desperate after nearly nine months of having no positive physical contact with other people that he would take comfort in the demon who was the main cause for why it was happening in the first place? However, a bigger part of himself was just tired, so very tired of the constant emotional olympics his self-hatred would force him to go through every single day.

He closed his eyes and for a moment, he allowed his own mind and heart to fool himself and pretend that the last part of yesterday never happened. He chose to believe in the fleeting happiness of the illusion that his best friend had never gone into a coma and tht Anti was merely a part of an excruciatingly long nightmare.

When he opened his eyes again, the sun had gone down outside but he can’t find the energy in himself to give a fuck about time moving on without him.

Chase heard his phone buzz with new notifications. He stomped down the flickering spark of hope that it would be any of his brothers finally answering his messages and calls. He knows that he can’t keep blocking out the world like this especially when the world needs him to be Jack McLoughlin so with an exhausted grunt, he slowly pushed himself up to a sitting position and reached over to the left bedside drawer to grab his phone.

He pressed the button on the side and was relieved to see that it was just Doctor Adam rather than one of Jack’s friends asking Jack if he was alright.

Dr. Adam: Mr. Brody? You haven’t replied to my messages for a while. Is everything alright?

The concern from the doctor melted some of the ice numbing his heart. This man really reminded him of Henrik albeit softer and more formal.

Chase: I’m ok doc. But I don’t think I’ll be able to drop by for a while. Think I caught a bug on the way back or something and I don’t want to transfer any of it to Jack. I’ll try to take a few more days off until I’m sure I’m okay. :)

Dr. Adam: Ah! I thought so… You’ve never missed a day visiting your brother unless you were really sick. So I was worried. But since you said that you’re okay I have to trust that you know yourself and your limits by now. Do take care of yourself! Get a lot of sleep, eat something even if it’s just buttered toast (altho I would prefer if you ate healthier foods…), drink lots of liquid, and make sure you take your medicine.

Chase: Yea, I’ve been doing all that Just keep me updated on Jack pls?

Dr. Adam: But of course, I know how much you worry over your brother. Anyway, I’ll leave you to rest. I hope you get well soon!

‘I hope I do too, Doc.’ Chase wiped a hand over his weary face with a loud sigh.

He placed his phone down on his bed when his eyes caught sight of something sharing the same drawer that his phone had been placed in earlier. It was his medicine and it was placed on top of what appeared to be a note. He knows what the pills were obviously for but the note awakened some of his curiosity and anger.

It was obvious who wrote that note.

He wanted to run over to his desk and grab his lighter to burn that seemingly innocent looking white paper as anybody with a shred of common sense should. However he knows himself. He knows his curiosity over what the note would contain would itch at him for a long long time if he didn’t find out what it said.

He inhaled deeply and slowly let the air out as a low hiss through gritted teeth while he mussed up his already messed up hair.

“Fucker,” Chase insulted both the demon for taking advantage of his thrice damned curiosity that could rival the stubbornness of a spoiled cat, and himself for falling for this obvious show of manipulation as he forced his arm to reach out and grabbed the paper.

He crumpled the note into a wrinkly ball and stared down at it with some trepidation. What horrific message will this paper contain? Was it going to contain some blackmail worthy secret? Maybe taunt him for his complete breakdown yesterday? Jesus Christ… He literally fell apart on top of the bastard. He’d wish he could erase the memory but Anti would probably take that as permission to completely fuck him up mentally and maybe possess him as a little treat.

Well, he can’t keep stalling for more time like a coward. He uncrumpled the paper, smoothing it out on his covered lap, and read it with some trepidation.

One pill every eight hours from the moment you wake up. Going to be busy for a while. Don’t wait up for me, little brother. You’re still sick so don’t have a breakdown every other hour. Remember I’M ALWAYS WATCHING

Chase stared down at the note that was practically dripping with sarcasm with an expressionless gaze. A form of calm had settled down upon him and he almost absentmindedly started to rip the note in half. He doesn’t know what to feel about the laughably simple note. Should he get angry? Should he spend the time away from the bastard trying to decode some sort of hidden message from it?

In the end, he decided that it wasn’t worth the energy to get annoyed or obsessed over the taunt. He spent the next few minutes tearing the note into teeny tiny pieces before he left it scattered all over the top of his lap in unsalvageable scraps.

The ripping and tearing actually brought him some satisfaction which he relished in no matter how tiny it was. He swept the mess off his bed with a wide wave and watched it free fall to the floor like snow during winter. The man slid off his bed and spitefully ignored the medicine before he dragged himself over to the bathroom to freshen up.

He took a short shower, changed into fresh new indoor clothes, and dried his hair with a towel before brushing it up until it stayed neat and fluffy on his head. A sudden burst of productive energy suddenly shot through his entire body when he looked over the entirety of his room and realized just how filthy he had let it become over the months.

Chase could almost hear Anti sneering at him at the back of his head, telling him how useless and broken he was when nobody is there to pull him forward like a fucking donkey.

A massive wave of spite mixed in with his burst of energy and he began walking around the room to gather up his dirty clothes to put inside a hamper that he carried over to his laundry room to load up inside the washing machine. Then before working the machine, he went back to his room to change his bed sheets and blanket to a clean one before hefting them all up to the laundry room. While the washer was humming and vibrating as it got to work, he grabbed two big trash bags from his current location before he walked back to his bedroom.

The first step to feeling better after another one of your long episodes is to clear up the clutter that built up around you. It will help you associate clearing up as another way of resetting your own point of view.

A tiny smile twitched up at the corner of his lips as Henrik’s gruff but gentle voice as he coaxed him from his bed in the past. He separated his trash into two bags and straightened up to look around his now cleaner room. Chase tied up the trash bags so that none of them would spill out before he opened up his window and smiled faintly at the refreshing evening breeze that brushed against his heated face.

Then he walked over to his closet to bring out the Roomba that he hasn’t used for a while, letting out a victorious ‘heh’ when it still worked and placed it in the middle of his room before turning it on to roam around the floor to suck up the dust that built up over the past months.

He gave his cleaner and brighter bedroom another look over with satisfaction pulsing in his chest before making two trips up and down the stairs to take out the trash that he just collected and move the piled up dirty mugs on his desk down to the kitchen.

“How’s this for being useless and broken, asshole?” Chase spitefully said into the empty air towards the absent being who insulted him daily when he was there. “Fuck you.”

Chase huffed to himself in the middle of the kitchen while he was crouched over his dishwasher, loading it up with all the dirty dishes. After he closed the thing’s door, he realized as his stomach growled rather loudly, that he was pretty hungry.

“I’m hungry but I’m not in the mood for anything too heavy or chewy…” Chase hummed while he browsed the contents of his fridge. He leaned over and grabbed the covered bowl at the back of the fridge. “Oh hey, this was the cream of mushroom soup I ordered a week ago… It doesn’t smell bad so I guess it’s still fine!”

He heated it up on the stove before scooping them all up into a clean bowl. He placed a spoon with it before he walked over to the living room. Chase turned on the TV before laying on his side at the couch while he slurped up his soup.

‘Man… If Hen was here he’d probably be telling me that this soup isn’t healthy enough for me,’ Chase chuckled to himself, eyes misting over with nostalgia over the memories of his most fussy older brother. ‘Then he’d threaten to tie me up on a chair and feed me his horrid homemade food.’

Henrik might be one of the smartest people in the world but his cooked food… There’s a reason why he was never allowed to cook for them during their weekly gatherings. He remembered Marvin telling him a story about his first time of coming into contact with Henrik’s Mystery Food and swearing on his name and magic that it had a living soul.

“It’s not that bad!” He would hear Henrik stomping his feet on the floor while imagining the lethal glare he’d give his brothers while they gently redirected him even as he’s protesting the discrimination loudly from the kitchen.

“Henrik please… Every single bite Jackie makes of your food immediately sends him to the hospital and you of all people know that he’s immune to nearly all sorts of poison.” Jack squeezed the fuming doctor’s tensed shoulders in an attempt to calm him down.

“Come on, Jack-Jack. You don’t have to sweeten the truth up for our mother hen,” Marvin’s delighted and mischief-filled voice would snicker from the other room where he was probably curled up on the floor near the window to get the maximum sunshine. “Henrik, your food tastes so bad that Jackie’s mind blocked out any memory of the taste to protect him from relieving the trauma.”

“As if your cooking is any better!” Henrik would shoot back scathingly.

“At least I can survive on it on my own and feed some of it to others!” Marvin would have puffed up as he readied himself for their banter.

“Guys please,” Jackie, ever the peacemaker, would try to calm the duo down while Jack wouldn’t even try and raise the white flag the second they start.

Chase laughed to himself at the present time as he recalled the loud racket Marvin and Henrik would make while they exchanged light-hearted insults. He would’ve been in the kitchen, humming and smiling while he busied himself with his cooking. A few minutes later would find Creator and Hero skulking back to his safe grounds with their tails tucked neatly between their legs and trying to help him but he’d just easily shoo them off to pout at the kitchen table.

‘I wish Jamie had experienced that before everything went to complete shit,’ Chase’s smile turned bittersweet at that stray thought. ‘Henrik and Jack would’ve loved him. He and Hen would probably spend some nights drinking tea in the middle of the night with each other. He’d have helped curtail some of Marvy’s sharp nature with a light smack on the shoulder. Jackie would’ve been so glad to have someone helping him act as the peacemaker of the family. Jack… Jack would’ve adored him. He’d gush about how Jamie was so spirited, so sassy, expressive and—and how he and Marvy always loved so fiercely…’

Chase licked his spoon clean (Marvin would’ve been looking at him with disgust and tell him that he’s a mannerless savage which… bold words for someone who would lick their balls while in their cat form) and dropped it down with a loud ear ringing clang on the now empty bowl before placing them on the living room table. He scooched over and laid down on his back on the couch and crossed his arms at the back of his head as a makeshift pillow while he reminisced.

Anti might insult him for doing nothing else but think of the past but it was the only thing that gave Chase the energy to keep moving forward even if he didn’t really want to. For the sake of all his loved ones who would’ve wanted to experience those memories in the future with them after all of these bullshit… Yeah, he’d trudge through all the painful days for them.

He closed his eyes and tried his darnest to remember anything memorable that had happened since the others left him behind but other than Anti’s unforgettable presence, everything else passed by in a blur.

“Damn,” Chase sighed, his smile lacking any light nor humor to it. “Anti really had a point when he said that I’m useless without the others huh?”

It is not your fault, Chase. Depression has the tendency to mix all your memories together in an unrecognizable blur. Do not worry. We are always here to help you remember.

“Unfortunately Doc,” Chase sighed as he sat up and grabbed the dirty bowl and spoon to place them together in the washer. “The only person left who’ll help me remember the past months is a complete bastard who I wouldn’t entrust my head to even if I had to choose between him and pain.”

Not that he really wanted to remember anything… He’s pretty sure that if he remembered anything it would just be of him whining about his loneliness, Anti fucking him up, and trying to keep up the Jack mask so that nobody else would find out that something had gone wrong.

He went back upstairs and moved the wet clothes from the washing machine to the dryer and loaded up the dirty bed sheets and blanket to the washing machine before heading straight for his bedroom. The Roomba died under his desk, having lost all of its battery while he was downstairs, and he scrounged through his dark closet for its charging adapter. Once the Roomba was set up and charging, he changed into his new pajamas and slipped back under his blankets.

He continued ignoring the set of pills on the drawer and turned on his side so that he could curl up under the sheets. Chase powered on Jack’s phone and waited for it to load so that he could check the comatose man’s social media. Another mentally and emotionally draining part of his imitation job was to maintain the Jack mask while pretending that the man was A-Okay and there was no reason for concern.

First, he pulled up Twitter and made a face when he realized that somebody posted something on the account while he was sick. Thank god it was just a little message to everyone that he was going to be on a break for a while because he was sick. It was still creepy that Anti could perfectly copy Jack’s mannerisms as he looked through the little retweets-interaction with everybody. Even he had some hard time fully copying his best friend’s posting quirks.

Either way, it was still annoying and stressful to Chase how the demon could keep pulling these kinds of shit with Jack’s social media. Maybe he should change to passwords and login info to everything while Anti was god knows where.

…

Chase sighed and shrugged. Then again, it’s not like that would be effective anyway. He knows that Anti was the one who keeps reblogging art of himself on the tumblr account even though he was pretty sure he changed the password nearly fifty times over the past few months. It never fazed him.

Speaking of tumblr… A part of him wanted to resent the community for giving the demon so much power through their attention via art, theories, and stories but he knows that it wouldn’t be fair of him to blame them for something that is completely out of their control. It’s not like they knew that the thing with Anti which they knew to be an ‘ARG-like’ story for the channel was actually his and his brother’s reality. Most of them were just people who were enthusiastic for the escapism their ‘story’ provided and he couldn’t exactly fault them for that.

He decided to update twitter that he’s feeling much better than before and that he’ll go back to filming videos tomorrow. The replies were almost immediate as the community reassured him that it would be fine if he took more days off to recover fully and he can’t help but smile at their unending support even if it was actually directed towards Jack. He knows that they wouldn’t mind it if he took an entire week off but he gets really antsy when he’s not putting up any content for the channel.

It feels like if he doesn’t keep it up, there’ll be nothing left for Jack to wake up to, all the hard work he put into this channel and community has been one of his brother’s ultimate joys. He doesn’t want to see Jack’s devastation if he also loses the community that he so dearly loved to the coma.

Besides… It’s not like he can afford to slack off while the others are trying their hardest to save Jack. This and taking care of Jack was the only thing that he could do to be of some use rather than become another burden to his brothers.

After he read and replied to a few more retweets, he turned off Twitter and moved his attention to the other big gathering place for the community. He tapped Tumblr’s app button and scrolled down Jack’s blog and let out a sharp, annoyed exhale when he saw that Anti had been busy reblogging things related to him or him torturing the other egos while Chase had been indisposed. A lot of the theorists hit the nail on the head when they theorized that the one who had been reblogging Anti-related things without any caption had been Anti.

It must have been something about Tumblr’s wonky programming but Anti can’t say anything or it’ll come out all glitched and zalgoed. Of course, he could’ve gotten maximum attention that way but he probably thought that it would be much better to have the fans stewing and trying to obsess over every single action that may or may not relate to Anti by having it all be a mystery.

Sometimes Chase wondered if maybe he and his brothers could make use of the community’s eagle-eyed observations that tend to hit right most of the time to help them find out a way to save Jack. He’s lost count of how many times they’ve managed to notice something that he hasn’t noticed such as a little subtle glitch on the video’s audio, a flash of someone in the back of his facecam, or even changes in the description or titles of the videos that was definitely not made by him.

Their skills would’ve been impressive if it wasn’t downright frightening for how obsessed they seem to be with Anti.

He reblogged a few cool artworks and edits with little words of encouragement under their captions. Then he’d like some of the little sneak peeks to the daily lives of the community members that always made him smile because at least these funky little people are doing their best to live. It’s a nice reminder and boost to the morale that there was a reason why he was also doing this other than to keep the channel up and running for Jack’s comeback.

Chase stretched out his arms and legs with a jawbreaking yawn as he felt the sleepiness settle in. He looked at the time on his phone and made a face when he saw how late it was. No wonder his eyes were starting to blur with sleep. He decided to set his alarm clock up for the morning. He’s gotta wake up early to prepare himself to go under the Jack mask and record a video after all.

The tired man scooched underneath the blanket, covering himself up to his bed and curled up into a tight ball while tugging the sheets around him. A spark of pride welled up inside his chest when he thought back on how he managed to do a little bit of productivity in tidying up his bedroom. While he definitely started out the day rough and numb, he managed to salvage it by the end.

At the end of the day, it’s these teeny tiny baby steps that would bring you much farther than you thought when you look back in the future. So do not sell yourself short, Chase Brody.

Never forget that we are always proud of you no matter how inconsequential you believe your little progress was.

Henrik’s gruff but gentle voice echoed through his mind, easily drowning out all the insecurities and dark voices sneering at him for his pride. For the first time in a long while, Chase fell asleep with a faint but sincere smile on his lips.

0-0-0-0-0-0-0

“Maybe you should’ve jumped higher for that trick shot so that you wouldn’t have fallen over and broken your foot,” Jack’s voice shook with silent laughter as he leaned on Chase’s side while they both watched Henrik scrambling around, fussing over Chase’s foot that was placed in a cast, and fluffing up pillows to squeeze behind Chase’s back while he’s relaxed on the couch and worrying his head over whether his broken foot was raised high enough.

Henrik spun around and levelled a death glare towards his creator who instinctively raised both hands in a show of harmlessness, the doctor bared his teeth at him, “If you keep encouraging him to do more reckless acts I will break your own leg.”

Chase coughed and choked on a laugh and gave his doctor older brother a smile full of innocence and sunshine when he swiftly turned around to glare at him as well while Jack sputtered in the background. Jackie was dying on the floor. He sounded like he was about to upgrade from his booming cackling to wheezing, dying laughter.

“Wh— You took an oath to never harm another human when you became a doctor!” Chase turned his head to look at Jack when he felt him sitting up straight and leaning forward with an outraged look.

“I did no such thing,” Henrik snubbed. “It was whichever fake Schneeplestein that magic made to explain my existence in this universe that made such an oath.”

“You’re still a doctor!” Jack yelled vehemently, slapping a hand on his knees.

Henrik sniffed. He looked down at Jack from behind his nose and made him feel like he was some worm tainting the bottom of his shiny shoes. Then the doctor dramatically turned his back on the pouting man obviously giving him the cold shoulder.

“Chaaaase,” Jack twisted his body to ‘sob’ into his best friend’s shoulder. “Henny’s being mean to me again!”

“There, there,” Chase snickered as he patted the older man’s curly hair. “I won’t let the big bad doctor bully you anymore.”

Jack turned his head so that his cheek was pressed on top of Chase’s shoulder and he stuck his tongue out at Henrik who rolled his eyes back at him.

A massive white maine coone glided into the chaotic living room, jumping up on the back of the couch, and strolled over to smack Jack’s face with his outrageously long and fluffy tail—while ignoring the annoyed yelp ‘Marvin!’ before the poor man started sneezing and cursing the magician’s existence—as he slid down a bemused Chase’s torso into his lap. He rubbed his fluffy body against his little brother’s chest with a loud meow for his greeting.

“Hey to you too, Marvy,” Chase chuckled as the cat began to purr.

Marvin’s purr grew louder until he was practically like a growling motorcycle and arched his spine when Chase’s fingers stroked him from the bridge of his pink nose down to his tailbone. The heavy white cat kneaded his claws into Chase’s baggy shorts before circling around—ignoring Chase’s agonized groan at his weight—and curling up into a smug self-satisfied ball on his lap.

“You satisfied now, Drama Queen?” Chase teased the magician with a fond smile while he scratched the cat on the perfect spot behind his ears. “I think we should put your cat form on a diet. You’re getting pretty heavy.”

The cat nipped at his fingers with a hint of a warning bite but Chase just tapped his prickly older brother on his nose as a gentle reprimand. He only got a bunch of annoyed chattering for his daring gall to touch his majesty.

“Marvin, you better not bite anyone again,” Henrik dryly warned the magician who hissed at him. “Don’t think I can’t sedate you into going to the vet and getting you neutered.”

Marvin let out an offended yowl and attempted to stuff his massive unit of a body under Chase’s shirt, drawing giggles from the man who tried pushing his fluffy butt away as his squirming body dragged his soft fur over his ticklish stomach.

“Marvin, you fucker!” Chase squealed and tried to pull out the squirming cat who somehow managed to find the perfect position and perk out only his head from under his shirt. “Really? You’re going to subject me to your stinky butt for the entire movie marathon?”

His only response was a thick tail that thwapped his sputtering face.

“Aww… It’s just his way of showing you his love, Chasey-wasey,” Jackie giggled without looking up from his phone. “Also I can’t blame Marv for wanting to snuggle up to you. You’re like a portable heater slash teddy bear.”

“Yeah well, I’d say Marvy would be like a teddy bear too if it weren’t for the fact that he weighs like a rock on top of my kidneys,” Chase deadpanned before smacking Marvin’s back through his shirt irritably. “Use your claws on me again and I’ll neuter you myself without the help of a vet.”

Jack snickered at the irritated mewl from the cat while Henrik huffed and rolled his eyes at their antics. The doctor sat on the right couch seat and pulled the side lever up so that he could fully recline his body and feet. Jack leaned over and grabbed the remote from the table in front of him and Chase.

“Everybody finally settled down for our movie night?” He asked, just to make sure so that nobody would suddenly whine in that childish sort of voice that he didn’t wait for them again.

coughJackiecough

Jackie gave him a thumbs up and finally looked up from his phone. He was laying on his stomach on the blanket he set on the floor with a variety of pillows forming his nest around him. His own bowl of popcorn and a massive bottle full of Sprite was set in front of him.

Chase makes an agreeing grunt while he leaned on him on his side, taking care not to move his cast while Marvin chirruped from under his shirt, his little head poking out directing his nose to the bowl of popcorn on the table. Henrik just shrugged and gestured his head towards the screen.

“Just get on with it. If anybody was not ready I am sure that they’ll be letting out some godforsaken complaint through their loud mouths,” Henrik scathingly said but his eyes glimmered with laughter, taking off the bite from his words. He merely arched an eyebrow at everyone when they childishly stuck out their tongues at him.

Jack huffed and shook his head at the brotherly banters. No family activity would be the same without these chaotic preparations and quips from the others. He pressed play on the remote and started the movie. He sat back on the couch with Chase, his smile unconsciously growing wider when the youngest ego scooched closer to him.

…

“Is he asleep?” Henrik asked in a hushed tone as he craned his neck to look at Chase’s face which was hiding away against Jack’s side.

Jack nodded with a gentle smile and pressed a finger against his lips in the universal sign for silence. He slowly began to shift himself so that he could move Chase into laying down fully on the couch and for his head to be placed on his lap. Henrik assisted him, carrying the younger ego’s legs into the couch and made sure that his injured foot was raised with a few pillows propped underneath and around it to keep it from moving.

Chase made a soft noise and pressed his cheek on Jack’s stomach while the older man petted his head, idly rubbing a thumb against the healed over scar that would ache from time to time especially when Chase is particularly emotional. The sleeping man sighed contentedly in his sleep and murmured something far too unintelligible for either man to hear. Henrik grabbed one of the free blankets remaining to place it over Chase, tucking him under the warm sheets.

“I’ll get the other blankets—Marvin!” Henrik hissed as the cat that had been watching them from the table, slowly walked over to jump on Chase’s chest. Chase’s breath hitched but thankfully he didn’t wake up. Chase wrapped his arms around the cat who had stretched himself out over his little brother’s body and tucked his head under his chin. “You’re so lucky he’s a heavy sleeper. If you woke him up I would have shaved you, you needy cat.”

The cat flicked his ears at Henrik and made a show of nuzzling the bottom of Chase’s chin and purring almost as loud as a starting motorcycle to spite the doctor by showing just how comfortable he was in his makeshift bed.

Jack rolled his eyes at the little drama queen before he looked back at Henrik with a pleading smile, “Blankets please? It’s pretty chilly around here at night.”

Henrik sighed and nodded. He carefully maneuvered himself out of the crowded living room. Jackie had spreaded out his entire body on his own side of the room, snoring lightly while drool trailed down his cheek. Henrik made sure that he didn’t touch on the territory of the unknowing human venus flytrap who’d snap his arms around your legs in a flash the moment you stepped within his area of attack. Last time one of them (poor Marvin… despite screaming and trying to squirm out of those iron arms...) fell for that trap, they had to deal with a clingy as a leech Jackie for the entire night.

He went upstairs to grab extra blankets and pillows for him and Jack since someone (Jackie…) hoarded most of them for their nest and one of the original blankets was placed over Chase. When he went back down, Marvin was already asleep, his cat body slowly moved up and down to his rhythmic breathing. Jack was staring down at Chase’s face with a blank look which generally meant that the man was probably thinking something that was bothering him again.

As he passed by his creator, he gave the man a gentle smack on the back of his head with his elbow. “This is not the time for complicated thoughts. This is family time.”

Jack jolted at the hit and his voice, turning his head to make a silly face at him.

“I know, I know, I just can’t help it, Hen,” Jack sighed and patted Chase’s head. He peered at the doctor when he saw what he was carrying. “Huh, you got those from the closet in the hallway?”

“Where else would I get it? Here,” Henrik made Jack lean over so that he could place two pillows on the back of his neck. “Support for your neck.”

“Thanks,” the other man gave him a thumbs up with one of his free hands. “Can you uh place my blanket over my lap? I’ll move Chase’s head a bit.”

“Wait your impatient butt. I am just going to move around the couch.” Henrik said as he walked over to his own spot to drop his pillows and blanket before moving over to Jack.

Jack carefully lifted Chase’s head so that Henrik could slip the blanket over his lap. He absentmindedly rubbed a thumb over the sleeping man’s head when his brows furrowed at the movement and he looked like he was about to wake from his sleep. Thankfully, he settled down once he was returned to his previous position only he curled closer to his creator’s warmth.

“Ah man, Chase really is the best little brother I could ever ask for,” Jack sighed with a fond smile softening the weariness from his face.

Henrik snorted, giving Chase a little pat on his head before he walked back to his couch chair and dropped his body on it.

“And you say you don’t play favorites,” Henrik accusingly narrowed his eyes at Jack who stuck his tongue out at him.

“And I’ll keep saying it no matter how much you guys accuse me of it,” Jack grinned, his eyes sparkling with mischief.

The doctor rolled his eyes before spreading his own blanket over him. He turned over on his side and snubbed Jack with his back, ignoring the ‘Oh real mature, Henrik!’ that Jack shot towards him quietly.

“Goodnight Mister McLoughlin,” Henrik said in the snobbiest tone he could muster.

“Are you seri— Oh whatever, goodnight to you too, Doctor Schneeplestein.” He heard Jack huff and mutter something incomprehensible with his distance under his breath.

Henrik stifled a smile and his chuckle as he felt his creator fake pouting even with his back turned against him.

As he closed his eyes, he was highly aware of the sounds of soft breathing (or snoring in Jackie’s case…) coming from everyone in the room and he thinks that it’s the most beautiful sound he has ever heard his entire life.

He wished that he could stay in this single moment in time for as long as he wanted, to engrave it in his memories for when the nights are cold and when deep regrets are keeping him awake.

0-0-0-0-0

“Testing! Teeeeesting… Alright, the mic and audio seems to be okay,” Chase squinted at his face cam, flicking a finger in front of its lens to get its autofocus clearing up on his face. He brightened up when the camera finally focused just right! “Attaboy! Now we can finally start recording.”

He’s done his vocal warmups before he started setting up everything and even made sure that the house was nice and locked up and made sure that he doesn’t need to go for a pee break for one to two hours. Those moments are always a hassle and awkward for him and Robin to cut out. Not to mention it’s always a bit of a distraction especially when he is finally in the zone for the camera.

He also has his own lil water container filled with delicious fresh water in front of him, out of the camera’s point of view, just so he could freshen up his voice from all the screaming and yelling that he was about to do. While voice cracks are fun to jump from from a comedic point, it’s not nice to be known as the loudest Irish youtuber who still has voice cracks like a teenager going through puberty.

The phone has been muted and set on vibrate, and the games have been pulled up and listed on his desktop ready for recording!

Today’s video recording theme is… those medical surgery related games.

It had been an idea that had been drifting around his mind for a while but he didn’t have the mental and emotional energy to bother with the vivid reminders of his missing older brother. Maybe this was just another way of spiting Anti for what he had done to him a two days ago in his vulnerable state just like how his sudden burst of energy fueled him to prove that he wasn’t completely useless all alone by tidying up his wreck of a room in the middle of the night.

He knew that Anti seems to have it out for Henrik just as personally as he has it out for Jack since any mention of his brother has the demon hissing and spitting rage which he found rather peculiar since he’d have thought that the demon would be using what he’s doing to Henrik as another one of his taunts and considering he probably has the upper hand over the doctor right now. He stopped mentioning Henrik after that one moment when Anti had gone frighteningly still with his eyes glowing bloody murder towards him and then disappeared for a few hours. When he came back, he was covered in blood and Chase wisely didn’t ask him from whom it came from.

Since then, they never talked about it although Anti’s presence would be unbearable whenever he played any medical related game since it always felt like the demon was breathing down his neck (although knowing his luck he probably did but since he didn’t care enough to turn around and see that horrifying sight he’d like to believe that it never happened) just daring him to mention anything about his beloved doctor of a brother. The only time Anti made any comment about Henrik was literally that postcard hack on tumblr. That was a hell of a thing to open the app to.

He could feel the smugness rolling off Anti’s shadowed corner in waves during that day and he had to stop himself from vaulting over the couch to grab the demon who’s been pestering (severe understatement, he knows but still—) him for months and demand what the fuck he’s planning with the postcard.

Anyway, now that Anti wasn’t here (and thank fuck for that) he’s free to record and post this fun little thing for the channel. Honestly, it’s pretty odd to have the past two days of complete silence from Anti but it was also extremely refreshing and absolutely rejuvenating for his spirit. Oh, he didn’t doubt the ‘Always Watching’ threat from his last note but this was the most peaceful and private he’s been for the past months.

Chase adjusted the headset over his ears, checking to make sure that it wasn’t uncomfortable, before he stretched out his arms and body for the long recording session, releasing a satisfied groan at the obscenely loud cracks that his joints made with the stretch.

Okay… Close your eyes…

Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.

In the next few hours, Chase Brody will not exist. Instead, another man will take his place. How would he react to certain things and events? How would he act out a carefree skit of a parodied impersonation of their resident doctor?

Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.

Turn the chair around and…

Click

Something snaps into place as his lips stretched itself out into a familiar crooked goofy grin at the sound of his mouse clicking. The metaphorical mask slipping over his face felt so much more natural than when it was taken off at this point in time. He swung his chair around and greeted the invisible audience on the other side of the screen.

“Hello and welcome back! I am Doctor Jacksepticeye,” he both recognizes and doesn’t recognize the face that was looking back at him on the recording screen, “and welcome to my ER!”

It was easy, always so so easy to step into his shoes, to become someone who is dearly beloved by so many people, to become someone who has inspired this community to follow him. Every time he slips this mask on for the screen he always experienced this high knowing that for once he won’t be someone who was miserably alone and useless to his loved ones. If he immersed himself deeper into this mask, he could even believe that the people are seeing him and not Jack but that’s a thought that he’d brush off the moment it lingers at the surface of his mind.

However, while it was highly tempting to keep the mask up even by his lonesome, it always faded away the moment the camera stopped and left him far more drained than before he started recording.

Stop. Don’t think about that now.

Chase does not exist at this very moment.

Only Jack remained with that cheerful smile on his lips.

Finally, he allowed himself to fade into the background and push that persona forward to take his place.

In the next blink, Chase closed his eyes and Jack opened them.

0-0-0-0-0

The deep blue sky stretched over the horizon.

It was much too big. Much too hopeful.

It was too much for him who has been stuck in the darkness with no one but Him for company—

No.

Do not think.

Not yet.

Later. Yes, later. In safety. In his family’s safety and warmth.

The door had been unlocked. Why? Why had it been unlocked?

Then he was running, stumbling about in the abyss like a drunk and suddenly there was light—

It had been too bright, too warm on his cold skin that it felt like it was burning his flesh off like the hot po—

No. Regroup. Stop.

Do. Not. Think. About. It.

He ran and ran and ran amongst the crowd, deaf to the rude words that had been tossed towards his way when he crashed into someone and jumped away as if he had been shocked, deaf to the concerned strangers’ questions before he shoved their wandering hands away.

Don’t touch him. Don’t fucking touch him!

It hurts. His eyes hurt. His ears hurt.

It’s so loud. He missed the blissfully subtle static that always kept him company in his cell—

Stop speaking… Stop speaking! Shut up… Shut up. Shutupshutupshutupshutupshutup—

The colors began to shift around him and they… became familiar? Familiar streets. Familiar names.

There was that sound from the annoying dog barking from a neighbor’s—

Ah.

This must be another one of his games.

The front garden was unkempt. Why was it unkempt? There were no flowers blooming from the bushes that looked as dry and thirsty as he normally felt. His little brother loved—loves his gardening hobby. He loves seeing the smiles of the passersby and his family when they see the colorful flowers he’d carefully tend to every week.

Yes, this was just further proof that this was all an illusion. He wanted to scream. He wanted to tell Him to stop this farce. However, he knows that he must continue the show lest He becomes angry for his disobedience once more.

He walked on. There. The front door was in front of him. Instinctively, he reached into his coat’s pocket (since when had he started wearing this coat?) and of course, of course, the key was there.

The door is opened and he is greeted by a cold, silent hou…

No.

Wait.

He looked up. There was a voice. It was faint but there it is.

Which show was he putting on this time? A replay of that fateful day? Or perhaps it was another one of those games where He makes him pretend that he was finally free?

Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.

He walked up the stairs.

One.

Two.

Three.

The fourth door.

The Recording Room.

What sort of cruel joke awaits him behind this door he wondered?

He was tired. So so tired… Perhaps if he pretended to be the brave, cool headed doctor that he had been He would grow bored of this show quick.

Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.

The ice on the doorknob was a welcome sting to his constantly wandering, constantly moving mind. It keeps him still. Keeps him in the moment just like all of the pain—

Take all the shattered pieces of your bravery now, good doctor, and let it all out…

The door was flung open and the familiar—unfamiliar man in the room spun around in his chair and looked up at his heaving, shuddering body with a wide-eyed look. Yes, that face—that impossible face was the face of a comatose man as He often taunted him during their sessions— sat in front of him just told him that this was all just another one of His cruel mind games.

A flash of anger.

A dash of fear.

Then the ridiculous words streamed out of his lips as he pointed a shaking accusing finger angrily, fearfully at the shocked mirage before him.

“I-I am the good doctor,” he started, his voice growing louder to mask the racing, thundering heart attempting to rip itself out of his chest, “and that is my chair!”

“... Henrik?” At that trembling, fragile voice, the mirage shattered and suddenly his baby brother, the one who has always looked up to him like he knew all of the secrets held within this universe… the younger brother who had always, always undervalued his own existence… The baby brother that he so dearly loved was looking up at him, no traces of the impossible man were left behind. “Henrik, is that you?”

And for a second, he allowed his guard to drop, allowing the fragile piece of hope in his chest to wriggle up the surface of his beaten heart.

“Help me,” he begged. His voice was painfully raw and vulnerable as it clawed itself out of his throat.

Then as if he was just a puppet whose cruel puppeteer cut his strings out of nowhere just because he had grown bored of his broken toy, he crumpled forward, all remaining energy in his pathetically weak body dropping to a complete zero, and his legs toppled underneath him. He braced himself to meet the cold unforgiving floor of his cell while his warden cackled at his show of weakness…

But it never came.

Instead, someone caught his body and he was suddenly engulfed in that familiar softness and warmth as two arms gently but firmly wrapped themselves around his bony waist.

“I gotcha… I gotcha big bro. I gotcha,” Henrik closed his eyes and in a fit of broken exhaustion allowed himself to believe in this dream.

“Don’t let this be a dream,” he whimpered. “Don’t… Don’t let me wake up—”

“Shh… It’s not a dream. You’re home. You’ve come home. I promise,” he shuddered at that almost comforting voice and the hand that was stroking the back of his head tenderly. “I’ll still be here when you wake up. I promise.”

Chapped lips were brushed over his forehead and he slipped away into the familiar abyss.

Oh how the good doctor dearly wished that he could remain in this single moment of time rather than face the cruel reality of what was waiting for him the next time he opened his eyes.

#jacksepticeye #writersofjack #chase brody #henrik von schneeplestein #antisepticeye

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renegaderoots · 7 years ago

Photo

BASIC INFORMATION

♚┋FULL NAME: Theodor De Vries ♚┋PRONUNCIATION: Theo-dor (German pronunciation) ♚┋NICKNAME(S): Teddy, Theo ♚┋TITLE: The Gargoyle ♚┋OCCUPATION: shop owner / contract killer ♚┋~AGE: 36 ♚┋DATE OF BIRTH: 15 August ♚┋GENDER: Cisgender ♚┋PRONOUNS: He/Him/his ♚┋ORIENTATION: Homoromantic Demisexual ♚┋NATIONALITY: German ♚┋RELIGION: the best to describe it would be...a religious atheist? ♚┋SPECIES: Human ♚┋AFFILIATION: technically, his son. Realistically, the Morrison family. ♚┋GENERATION: third ♚┋THREAT LEVEL: for somebody born to be a vicious killer willing to fight dirty, Espen’s threat level is low. He isn’t aggressive or malicious, nor does he take any pleasure in violence.

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE

♚┋FACE CLAIM: André Hamann / Chris Hemsworth ♚┋EYE COLOUR: Green ♚┋HAIR COLOUR: dark blonde ♚┋DOMINANT HAND: ambidextrous ♚┋HEIGHT: 184 centimeters or 6′0 ♚┋WEIGHT: 158 lbs ♚┋TATTOOS: Just...too many to possibly list. Think up every imaginable gothic cliché in existence and you’ll probably find it somewhere on his body - along with a cupcake on his left butt cheek because he’s an idiot. ♚┋SCARS: predominantly burn scars. ♚┋PIERCINGS: snakebites ♚┋GLASSES: in theory, yes, but the lazy bastard doesn’t even know how to put on two matching socks so, like, what do you expect here?

PSYCHOLOGY INFORMATION

♚┋JUNG TYPE: ISTP ♚┋SUBTYPE: Logical ♚┋ENNEATYPE: 7w8 ♚┋MORAL ALIGNMENT: Chaotic Neutral ♚┋TEMPERAMENT: Sanguine/Choleric ♚┋SCHEMA: VH, SI, NP ♚┋INTELLIGENCE TYPE: Visual-Spatial, Bodily-Kinesthetic, Logical-mathematical ♚┋~IQ: 132 ♚┋NEUROTYPE: Unsure as of yet. ♚┋AT RISK? Well, I mean, solely based on environmental factors, there’d be ample reason to believe he may be at risk.

BACKGROUND INFORMATION

♚┋HOMETOWN: Cologne, Germany ♚┋CURRENT: Dublin, Ireland ♚┋LANGUAGE(S): German (mother tongue), Dutch (native speaker level), Irish (lower-intermediate level) ♚┋SOCIAL CLASS: upper middle class ♚┋DEGREE: Master’s degree ♚┋SUBJECT(S): Forensic nursing ♚┋PARENT #1: Gerrit De Vries, deceased ♚┋PARENT #2: Beatrice De Vries neé Hoffmann, deceased ♚┋SIBLING(S): Lena De Vries, deceased, Alexander De Vries, deceased ♚┋MAIN SHIP: Espen/Sam (bromance) ♚┋RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Single ♚┋CHILDREN: Oliver De Vries, alive, three years ♚┋PET(S): none ♚┋ADOPTED? Yes. After his parents’ death, Espen was adopted by his paternal grandfather. ♚┋RAP SHEET? Nothing yet. ♚┋PRISON TIME? Not yet.

VICES / HABITS

♚┋SMOKES? like a chimney. ♚┋DRINKS? Yes. ♚┋DOES DRUGS? Used to, yes. Stimulants (i.e. ecstasy) and hallucinogens like LSD ♚┋IS VIOLENT? Not at all, ironically enough. This is so hard to believe because Espen’s family consisted primarily of criminals, including former intelligence agents, one might be quick to falsely assume that their natures - violent, predominantly - are irrevocably ingrained in his being; but this couldn’t be further from the truth. If at all necessary, Espen will only react defensively, thus defending himself physically, when there’s no other way. ♚┋HAS AN ADDICTION? Not anymore. ♚┋IS SELF-DESTRUCTIVE? Yes. ♚┋HABITS: perpetually confused about what clothes are - likes to walk around his flat completely nude. Unsurprisingly, he also sleeps without any clothes on. Cannot sit on chairs like normal people. Hello bad blood circulation. ♚┋HOBBIES: sewing, alternative fashion, taxidermy, reading (mostly Gothic literature because he’s extra like that), taking care of baby bats, vblogging, weaponry, medieval history, travelling around the world to visit castles, tarot card reading, make up (both theater and alternative), book reviews on youtube, gaming ♚┋TICS: grunting (especially when stressed or extremely anxious. It’s happened before that that’s all he does while he completely shuts down normal communication.) ♚┋OBSESSION(S): none ♚┋COMPULSION(S): has to arrange food a certain way on his plate lest he won’t eat it

MISCELLANEOUS INFORMATION

♚┋HOUSE: Gryffindor ♚┋VICE: Wrath ♚┋VIRTUE: Temperance ♚┋ELEMENT: Fire ♚┋ANGEL: Uriel ♚┋MYTHOLOGICAL CREATURE: Vampire ♚┋ANIMAL: black cat ♚┋MUTATION: time manipulation ♚┋WOULD SURVIVE POST-APOC? No. Sadly, he has morals.

STATUS INFORMATION

♚┋DEVELOPMENT: Semi-developed ♚┋SHIPPING: Shiplocked. Not to a particular ship, mind you, but because of Espen’s background and personality, it would be ooc for him to commit to multiple ships (even if they’re regarded separately). ♚┋VERSE: Multiverse ♚┋VERSE TYPE: crime, slice of life ♚┋CANON: crime ♚┋PLOTTING: open ♚┋CREATION DATE: August 2017

CHARACTER SUMMARY

After five minutes, you’ll have no better descriptor for Espen other than fucking weird – and rightfully so. Everything from his demeanor down to his most perfunctory mannerisms, the man defies social conventions without even trying all that hard. Raised to patch up his mother’s career as a discharged intelligence agent, Espen grew up isolated from his peers, trained and groomed mostly and certainly not treated like a son. Eventually, their renegade ways caught up with them; the result being murder in the first degree. Following these events, he was adopted by his paternal grandfather and Theo became Espen. All tragedies aside, his golden heart and warm eyes give away his personality at first glance. There’s compassion in his actions that shouldn’t be feasible given that his body count is heavy. Now that there’s another life in the picture, namely his kid, Espen is determined to find the exeunt to his tragedy. Good morals and good character, unfortunately, don’t mean shit when you’re indebted to a crime cartel.

APPEARANCE DESCRIPTION

Physically, the guy is average and contrary to what one might believe, he doesn’t really stick out from the crowd save for his colorful sleeve tattoos. Standing 6’0 tall, Espen isn’t exactly a frightening, towering figure either. How he manages to stay fit with the serious sweet tooth that he has is a mystery, but his build is, without doubt, rather muscular. His accent is quite a minuscular detail yet, still, a faint German accent can be heard. What will certainly turn some heads, however, is his clothing. True to his decade-old fondness for the Goth subculture, you won’t ever see him wearing anything that isn’t various shades of black. When he can be bothered to dress up, Espen likes to wear a combination of Edwardian and Trad Goth attire, though the classic ’90 aesthetic of the vampire is also something he wears daily. Due to his appearance, his demeanor is key and he knows this. You can’t just be withdrawn or aloof looking like him, so he goes out of his way to be kind and courteous – especially towards elder people. Since his wardrobe is black and then black, his light brown hair and green eyes are accentuated even moreso, his look always attentive. And when you’re close enough to him, you will smell a few drops of a vintage perfume for women, namely Guerlain Shalimar; a coveted assortment of vanilla, tonka beans and castoreum musk.

PERSONALITY DESCRIPTION

Espen is the pinnacle of wasted brilliance and proof, as he says, that one’s IQ is relative if there’s not a grain of ambition in your body. That’s pretty much his lot in life; a double-edged sword, if you will, with which he has accidentally stabbed himself more than once. His intelligence is only outmatched by how much of a fucking sloth he is. He’s Snorlax personified, essentially, and if nobody actively pestered him to be productive, the guy would probably just suffocate in his own filth. As the common genius stereotype would suggest, Espen is emotionally inhibited and socially inept, unable to function in social settings. This, while somewhat true, isn’t entirely accurate either. Sure, his tact is less than ready to tango and he often comes across as remorselessly crude because he has only a rudimentary grasp on what is socially acceptable. Simultaneously, however, he is not content to just build a wall of silence around him. No, Espen tries his best to tune in to what others are partial towards, reacting accordingly. There’s also always a kernel of humor in his interactions, one that might imply he doesn’t take anything seriously. Because if he does, it matters. Be that as it may, a cold, malicious asshole he is not. He could be; would have enough reason to be – yet he is not if his numerous flaws can be reined in. Even his humoristic take on pessimism is charming. He’s the type of person who knows his odds, yet still does the thing to crack others up. In contrast to this, though, Espen isn’t idealistic – he knows the world is a shithole. Often a devil’s advocate and a complete shut-in when stress hits him, emotions still make him feel insecure and incompetent – every emotional response might be the wrong one, after all.

SKILLS / COMPETENCES

Espen doesn’t really care for languages, yet can communicate on native speaker level in three languages – English, Dutch, German. Where he really shines is his creativity and fashion sense. He loves giving baby bats fashion advice, quickly one to offer help when things are tough at home, too. Of course, he shouldn’t be underestimated either. Though not proud of this skillset, per se, he is nonetheless adept at social engineering, sociology, basic psychology, martial arts, vehicle and foot surveillance, marksmanship, and, naturally, hand-to-hand combat. As mentioned above, giving in to his benevolent and amiable side, Espen pursued a master’s degree in forensic nursing. Beyond that, he is also excellent at forgetting important dates, being late, being tired and eating everyone’s food. Oh, yes, and an obscure knowledge of medieval and Celtic history to boot, he’s really into medieval markets/costumes.

INTERPERSONAL MANNER

In a word, odd. Just plain fucking odd. Here he is not even able to survive without somebody constantly kicking his ass to get his shit together; here he is with barely an idea what decorum is and he still tries to be kind, even though it’s technically not in his nature to be any of that. Although Espen may come across as secretive, private and somewhat shy at first, any worries are forgotten as soon as mischief, fun, or sweets are involved. Now, ever since his family died, Espen has been somewhat clingy with the few people he has in his life, much like a cat demanding instant and constant attention. He doesn’t take well to being ignored, and won’t stop until he has your undivided attention. As for romance, Espen isn’t really made for that; not in the conventional sense. A very solitary creature by default, it is very hard for even him to tell whether what he feels are genuinely deep emotions or just what he feels compelled to feel. Either way, if you express interest, Espen will go to great lengths to ensure you feel nothing but wanted and validated.

INSPIRED BY: the guy on Lie to Me, Edmund (King Lear), Deadpool tbh

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