#asahi x reader angst

[goddamnosamu]

Two Ghosts Falling

Part 2 of [12:49am]: Writing songs is not easy

Pairing: idol!Asahi x reader 

Word count: 1373

Warning: alcohol mention but nothing too serious

A/N: This was so long overdue, and I’m really sorry for that. It’s just been pretty hectic with stuff that’s going on in my life but I decided to at least make a part 2 of the story that I first wrote and posted in this account. I’m thankful for all the hearts and reblogs, it truly makes me happy that people continue to like my work even if I’m gone for a long time. I’ll try to post once things start to look up for me, but for now please enjoy this. I apologize for the pain LMAO I love angst <3 leave a comment, reblog, or heart if you enjoyed it.

“In short, I screwed up,” 

Of course, the shock that his members had on their faces was enough to tell that they were disappointed in him, albeit won’t really say it to his face. It was painfully obvious; who was even to blame for a relationship that felt one-sided despite the two loving each other? Asahi doesn’t even know what time it was when he finished telling his break-up story to the members. Without hearing a word from them, he left the room trying to calm himself down because he never really learned how to cope with the pain that he caused to both of you. Writing his thoughts didn’t help anymore, bottling up his feelings will only leave him crying for hours, and painting will only end up with art that resonates with his agony from both the stress of being an idol and losing you. Thinking back, he never really knew how to cope because he was always met with your comfort when he was stressed. 

It’s been months and he still can’t bring himself to go out. The only time he does go out is when he has a schedule for the day or one of the members promised free coffee. Anything other than that, he only checks the lives of other people on social media. Surprisingly, you didn’t block him in your account and you retained your account for the public to see. He could see you succeed in the stories you told him about, and even the little celebration posts. Asahi continues to see you striving in your own life without him, yet he is still miserable the day you left him. He wanted to patch things up with you; try to tell you that he needs you and he regrets his actions. But when that time does come, he’s afraid he’ll run out of things he can say to bring you back. 

At an early night, Asahi reluctantly agrees to spend a night in a bar with the other members. The members were pestering him about it and he only went just to get them off his back. He has been stressed enough already, but he really didn’t think that alcohol will solve his problems. Arriving at the local bar, Asahi was immediately welcomed by the strong scent of alcohol and the blaring music coming from the speakers around the bar. He was immediately dragged by Jihoon to the bartender and ordered a drink for the both of them. As soon as they got their drinks, where Asahi doesn’t even know what Jihoon got for him, he was left alone to ponder his thoughts and alcohol ready for his escape. 

Asahi doesn’t know how long they’ve been in here, but all he knows is he’s at his 4th cocktail. He was tipsy, but he manages to get a hold of himself for the time being in case the other members needed help going home. He admits to himself that the alcohol has helped a bit in forgetting; his mind is more focused on the music and seeing some of the members laugh their asses off on the dance floor. 

“Hamada Asahi. Here I thought you completely locked yourself up in the studio.��

It can’t be. 

“(y/n)?” Asahi said shakily, his eyes immediately filled with remorse. He knew it was inevitable that you’d meet each other, but he doesn’t expect it to be this early – denying the fact that he was just afraid to see you while he was still at his lowest. 

“How have you been?” you answered, completely unfazed by his heavy demeanor while you sat beside him. 

“Still locked in the studio, the others just dragged me here.” Asahi recovered from his shock, grabbing confidence from the alcohol he has. 

“How about you?’

“Oh, you know – same old, same old. Finally getting on track with my life and what I wanted to do,”

Asahi knew what you were talking about – of course, he does. The achievements on your social media, the updates about your life he hears when the others talk about you; you were practically there in every corner he looks. He looks at you as you waved to a person he’s unfamiliar with, probably a colleague you met from your now successful life. He’d wish for you to elaborate more, even if the stories were already told by you or others. It was too selfish for him to think of wanting to get back with you but needs to hear it from you, even if it meant that he was going to hurt again in the next couple of months.

“You know, I never wanted things to end,” he whispered, although you completely heard him. “All I ever wanted was to be by your side. I never knew how to write songs anymore because I lost all my inspiration for it. I’m sorry, but I can’t deal with the fact that you probably won’t talk about me to anyone or someone you wouldn’t want around or –”

“You are so fucking selfish.”

He looked at you in shock. Tears well up in your eyes as you bite your lip to prevent yourself from breaking down right then and there.

“You don’t get to decide what should I be in the relationship. You don’t even have the right to say that I’m the reason you’re miserable. How about me, Asahi? Did you ever stop and consider how I was feeling? The whole time in that relationship, I never even felt the love you bragged to others or the songs you wrote about me.” you stared at him while he can’t even bring himself to look at you. He knew you were right. This was what he wanted, right? For you to say what you’ve always wanted to say after the breakup. He looked at you as you continued. 

“And the worst part of all of that was that I still loved you.”

“I’m sorry.” pathetic, he thinks about himself.

“It’s already too late for that,” you murmured as you stared at your half-empty glass. 

“Look, I know I broke a lot of what I promised you when I dated you–”

“You didn’t just break promises, Asahi. You broke me, and honestly, I don’t know why I even continue to sit beside you right now and explain yourself.” you spat at him while paying for your drink. You were about to walk away when I suddenly grabbed your hand.

“Please don’t leave. I don’t know what I am now without you,” his tears were falling at this point. You both were probably getting stares but Asahi didn’t care. All he wanted was you, even if it meant that you both will try to remember how it feels to be one again.

“Let go, Asahi.”

“No, I don’t want to. Please just hear me out, I’ll–”

“And why the fuck should I listen to you? I said let go.”

“I didn’t mean to hurt you” his voice quivered, full of hurt and despair. He didn’t know what else to say other than apologies and desperation. 

“But you fucking did, didn’t you? You fucking did,” you scowled at him as your tears were now running down your cheeks.

You removed his hand from your arm and immediately left. He continues to kneel on the floor, trying to process everything that happened while his hands were on his head. His head was pounding and his body felt like giving up, but his chest was the most painful of all. It was like his heart was breaking again after it was pieced together forcefully. He gets the feeling that you’ll never need him again – he knew you didn’t but what other choice did he have to at least get through the day? He continued to hope before today, but tonight and the days to come will definitely feel like falling into a hole of despair where he won’t know how to save himself anymore. When he looks up, he never saw you again. All he heard was one of the members trying to get him to come back to his senses but his mind was too focused on remembering how his heart was supposed to beat without you, forever.

[ilylovelyz]

haikyuu boys when protective of you

most likely gets into a fight, does throw the first punch, and dramatically whines afterwards, forcing you to be his personal nurse ATSUMU, TANAKA, nishinoya, terushima, IWAIZUMI, hoshiumi

so insulting and almost degrading to whoever is threatening you that the offender ends up leaving out of embarrassment TSUKISHIMA, shirabu, KUROO, kenma, sugawara, daishou, akira, SUNA, kageyama, ushijima, futakuchi, hanamaki

YOU'RE the one who is protecting them SAKUSA, hachi, bokuto, YAMAGUCHI, GOSHIKI, asahi, tendo, AONE, oikawa (somehow), koganegawa, LEV

does his best to diffuse the situation, but ultimately leaves angry and mentally hexes them KIYOKO, akaashi, KITA, DAICHI, hinata, yaku, hirugami

spends the night in jail KENTARO, semi, yamamoto, mattsun, OSAMU

[phaelimbs]

There's something about the way you watched the dancefloor.

A soft tune of "Perfect" by Ed Sheeran in the background, the host announcing the start of the slowdance, all while encouraging everyone to find a partner for the dance. The crowd cheers, yet no one dances.

You turn to him, watching his movements, hoping, waiting for him to stand and ask you. Yet when he locks gazes with you, he shakes his head. But tonight is a special night, a night after graduation where most people will leave, a night to make memories before parting ways, it's special.

You frown, mildly upset. Your friends tap and encourage you to dance with him, but you could only shake your own head. Like they always do, they ask why, even calling out his name to dance with you— but then again, you both refuse. The dancefloor remains empty until finally, a friend of yours, along with her partner, walks to the dancefloor.

Your stomach churns, mildly upset that he didn't take you to the dancefloor. He already had during that one performance when everyone was doing so, why can't he do it now? Maybe he's just shy, you keep telling yourself to understand.

Can't he for once cherish the moment with you, put you first and ignore what others will say? Does he need to be asked to before initiating? Your mind races as you watch the lone couple dancing, all eyes on them and how they only matter to eachother, as if there was no one but them. He can't see you, his back turned to you as he fiddles with his phone. Maybe he's thinking of you like how you think of him right now.

Oh how you wish he could be as bold to love you loudly, to live in the moment and just dance. But for now, you could only watch, and wonder why he won't do the same.

- Tsukishima Kei, Kenma Kozume, Sakusa Kiyoomi, Asahi Azumane

(based on my experience and dedicated to me bc he didn't dance me during the slowdance ;( also feel free to suggest more characs)

[romaevelizz]

Hope your still mine ˖ ࣪⊹

Various! x Fem!reader

Inspired by Pretty little birds by Sza

˖ ࣪⊹ he sat In front of his desk doing his assignment his focus on them as you watched from the other side. It was weird the feeling that you’ll both be graduating soon. That you won’t see each other every day because of school, the sickening feeling of being accepted into different universities. Having to possibly work long-distance relationships.

The nightmare of breaking up because of that, living far away and not being able to work a relationship, the fights, the stress. That you wouldn’t be with him for the rest of your life that all of the talk of having a future might have just been talk… “I can feel you staring..”

You didn’t say anything just watched him you could feel your self starting to cry. All of it being so overwhelming, that maybe just maybe he won’t be yours anymore, that all of the memories and moments you’ve created and shared we to be forgotten. That he’d give up on you, that your ‘difficult’ nature would get rid of him even after all this time. That he’d get tired of you.

His eyes finally left if paper meeting your teary eyes, his brows frowning “love what’s wrong?” He asked his hand coming to cup your face whipping away stray tears that slipped down your face. “Common talk to be baby..”

“Please don’t give up on me..” you sobbed, “please..” his eyes filled with concern and he moved you close to him. “My love what makes you think that I’d give up on you, ever.” He asked his attention fully in you now.

You could only shake your head, nothing really just these intrusive thoughts that haunted you because you did want to be with anyone that he was the person you could only see yourself with ever. “I don’t know..” you muttered a frown plastered on your wet face.

“Hey, hey listen to me, just because we’re graduating doesn’t mean I’m gonna leave you. I dosent mean that if we go to different universities I’m not ever gonna take a train to come see you even if I’m traveling across the country. That I won’t call you every chance I get, hell I’d transfer schools if needed no matter how hard it is. No matter how angry we get at eachother I’d be right by your side once again. Because every day I wake up, every time I go to sleep I hope in the morning you’ll still be mine.” He spoke in full sincerity.

God his heart broke that you thought he’d ever give up on you because he may not be as open and giving to others but lord with you. With you it’s different his mindset is heart is so open, and he doesn’t want that with anyone else how could he? When you were right in front of him.

You were perfection no matter what. He pulled you ups to his lap your arms wrapping around his neck and his lips kissed your neck and shoulders softly. “I don’t want anyone but you.”

“I am yours, as you are mine. I plan on growing old with you I’m in it for the long run alright? Because I wanna be with you..” You nodded “I wanna be with you to..” you muttered lips meeting his the kiss filled with such love.

“I’ll find you no matter what.”

Tetesuro Kuroo, KENJI AKAASHI, WAKATOSHI USHIJUMA, Kiyoomi Sakusa, DAICHI SAWAMURA, Asahi Azumane, Toru Oikawa, HAJIME IWAIZUMI, Tobio Kageyama, KEI TSUKISHIMA, Takanobu Aone, Satori Tendo, + ur Fav!

[taones]

If You Can Hold On - A.A, S.K, S.D

Part four is finally here! reminder that I do not accept criticism, this could be crap but I do not care if it is <3 it's been like three years in the making so take it or leave it king!

pairing ~ poly asadaisuga x gn!reader

warnings ~ pining, angst, negative emotions, suggestive towards the end, probably bad writing but gimme a break I haven't written in a year, cursing <3

You couldn’t sleep.

Every time you closed your eyes it was like the image of the boys were burned into your retinas. At first, it had incited some sort of rage in you - their actions at the diner curdled with the waffles you had eaten, churning in a way that made your stomach feel tight and queasy. Admittedly,  Daichi got to you the most. He was never one to hide his emotions, but he usually kept his sadness to himself. It took a lot of effort over many years of friendship to get Daichi comfortable with expressing that in front of you. Seeing him so emotional, exhaustion weighing on his shoulders, had struck something in you. Not that you were sure what that emotion was.

The longer Kiyoko drove, the less angry you felt. The rage from the diner slid off your shoulders like water - which only allowed for fatigue to settle itself across your chest. Of course, that didn’t mean you could sleep. Instead, you gnawed on your lip and focused your gaze on the back of Yachi’s headrest, trying desperately not to think of the situation. 

Every time you thought back on the weekend that had passed, you couldn’t help but cringe. When they had talked about adding a third to their relationship, you had been so caught up in how you felt that you hadn’t stopped to be logical. Of course, seeing them with someone like that would hurt, but it would hurt so much more to not see them at all. There wasn’t much time for you to stop and be realistic about the situation. You four had known each other so long there was no way they would let you walk out of their lives that easily. 

Resting your head in your hands, you sighed. 

“You okay?”

You snorted, lifting your head to catch Kiyoko’s eye through the mirror. 

“Would you be?”

She hummed, shrugging her shoulders. 

“Probably not” she began, “but me and Yachi talk about our feelings.”

She paired her statement with a smile and a pointed look. Yikes. She was correct, naturally, but it didn’t make it any easier to hear. Her ‘I told you so’ tone made you cringe and immediately jump to defend yourself. 

“Okay, yeah good point, but it’s harder when its three of them and we’ve known each other for forever”

“And you’ve been moping for half of that” 

Grumbling, you adjusted in your seat. She was right, as Kiyoko often is. Deep down you knew it was dumb for you to sit on these feelings for so long and never even drop a hint to the boys about your feelings. You would say it was fear, but you knew it was cowardice. 

The traffic slowed to a stop in front of you, it was mid-evening now so you knew Kiyoko would be dying to get out and stretch her legs at some point. It would be a good opportunity to wake Yachi up from her never-ending nap and grab some coffee for the night stretch of the drive. The car had passed a marker for a rest stop a couple miles back anyway. The woman in the front whipped out her phone while the traffic was at a standstill and shot off a few texts rapidly. 

“This traffic doesn’t seem to be letting up any time soon, you should get some sleep and i’ll wake you up when we get to the rest stop”

Knowing Kiyoko, this was more of a ‘listen to me’ than a suggestion. Regardless, you felt your eyelids begin to droop at the mention of a nap. Soon enough, your head was resting against the cool window and you were drifting off.

—

Your body was jostled awake by the car pulling in. Night time had truly fallen by this point and the LEDs on the dash told you it had reached 9pm. Shifting, you forced your joints to crack and pop as you stretched your body back to life. Your joints screamed at you to get out of the cramped vehicle. 

“We’re here!” 

You groaned at Yachi’s chipper tone. 

“Come on sleeping beauty, lets get some coffee”

The industrial lights of the rest stop burned your eyes as soon as you walked through the revolving doors. The white linoleum floor squealed against your trainers and the swishing and screaming of coffee machines made your ears hurt. The crying had caused your nose to stuff up to the point you could tell your eyes were still crusty and puffy, even without checking in a mirror. Still, you persevered and trudged towards the coffee shop at the back of the stop. 

“We’re gonna go to the bathroom and meet you back at the car, that okay?” Kiyoko asked, pressing a palm to your shoulder. 

You nodded, rubbing your eyes. 

Honestly, you really didn’t give a shit if you were left alone in the rest stop - it meant you could escape its stupidly bright lights and ridiculous shiny flooring as soon as possible. Maybe having a coffee in your hand at the end of all this will make the awful situation seem ever so slightly better. But, until you had that coffee, you would continue grouchily stomping up the aisles of the rest stop. 

—

By the time you got back to the car, you assumed the girls would've already sat in the front seats - waiting for you to get back. Instead, the front seats were dark and empty and there was no sign of the couple. 

You tried the door - locked.

Footsteps echoed behind you. Your heart fell to your stomach. 

“y/n, thank god”

Your head whipped around, coming face to face with the three people you wanted to see least right now. Your mouth opened and closed like a fish. The coffee cup trembled in your grasp and you tried desperately to pretend like it was the cold. 

“Suga-what? Why are you guys here?” you asked, tripping on your words. 

“Because you ran off!” 

Taken aback, you took a step backwards towards the car. Suga, or even Daichi, talking to you like that. As with every friendship, there had been ups and downs but you and Asahi rarely argued. So him bursting out in an undeniably emotional way came as a shock to you. 

“Did Kiyoko text you?” you asked incredulously, ignoring his previous statement.

“Yeah we know we messed up Y/n, but you need to give us a chance to explain ourselves” he continued, running a hand through his hair, “you can’t just call Kiyoko and expect her to save you”

The sense of betrayal squeezed your stomach, even tighter, sending heat rushing through your limbs. Your mouth hung open in shock. The rage bubbled up inside you once again and you clenched your fist against the side of your jeans.

“I ran away? You pushed me out! All three of you did, with your secrecy and your whispering and your keeping things from me” you ranted.

“I am your friend, your best friend at that. You tell me when you change anything about your life but when you want to add some random person to your relationship - that's suddenly not for me to know? Because that makes so much sense!”

You gasped. That wasn’t meant to come out. 

The three men in front of you stared at you in shock. Asahi’s face was red as a firetruck and the other two were holding each other's hand in a death grip. Even though it had been upsetting you, that information was still something you were not meant to know. You couldn’t help but feel a curl of shame choking your stomach in its grip. Gnawing on your lip, you pulled your arms around your torso and shrunk away from the three men in front of you. It was easy to pretend that they were the ones at fault, and their actions definitely still hurt, but you were face to face with the consequences of your own actions and unable to accept that. 

A laugh broke you out of your stupor. It was a classic Daichi chuckle, mixed with hints of disbelief. You’d be lying if you said it didn’t make you somewhat insecure.  

“Oh my god, Y/n this is why we say you need to listen to us.” huffed Koushi. 

Asahi was just standing there in front of you, shoulders sagged. You stepped towards him, confusion still racking your brain. As much as you were upset with them right now, Asahi was still your friend and you knew how sensitive he could get. 

“It’s you, y/n” he mumbled.

You paused, brows shooting up. 

“Huh”

“It’s you, you’re the fourth person, you’re who we were talking about”

It felt like the wind had been sucked from your stomach. The bitterness of your coffee sat heavy on your tongue and began to make your stomach churn. Stumbling, you grasped tightly onto Asahi’s hands in front of you.

“You’re not serious?” you forced out, looking him in the eye. 

You could not have missed that. You searched for any sign they might like you continuously for the past almost-decade of friendship. Again and again you found nothing, so why has that changed now? They wouldn’t be messing with you, that’s not something Asahi would do. You scrunched your nose in confusion.

“Yes we’re serious, why do you think we’d hide it from you? That makes no sense at al-”

You cut the taller man off with a teary laugh, launching yourself at him to wrap him in a hug. He let out a small ‘oof’, obviously shocked - but held you in his arms regardless. 

“y/n, you’re always telling us about the value of communication and then you pull shit like this on us” came a teasing muse from the silver-haired man behind you. 

“Oh shush Kou, come here - both of you”

The other two joined your hug. Suga wiggled between you and your larger companion and Daichi wrapped his strong arms around all three of you. God, you were so stupid. 

“Wait, what does this mean?” you asked, pulling back, “for us then, for our friendship?”

“Uh, whatever you want it to mean really. I suppose it’s up to you” Daichi mumbled, scratching his head. 

“Um no, not saying what we really want is how we got into the situation in the first place, we need to tell the truth” Suga scolded, rubbing his hand up and down his brunette boyfriend's shoulder. 

“We would like you to join our relationship, y/n. Officially” 

Asahi spoke softly, resting his hands on your waist. 

Butterflies exploded in you. A grin broke out across your face, your gaze shifting to each one of the men in front of you. Naturally, you had imagined this moment several times - mostly teenage daydreaming. Everything from intimate confessions with dozens of roses, to loud and garish prom-confessions on the dancefloor had been imagined. Nothing, however, could compare to the feeling of hearing the words in real life. 

“We love you” Suga spoke gently into your ear.

“And we want you,” Daichi added. 

Tears welled up in your eyes and you sniffed. Nodding, you wrapped your arms around all three and best you could and tilted your head back in a giddy laugh. None of this felt real. It was almost too good to be true.

Cold droplets began to fall out of the sky, hitting heated skin from the rush of the confessions. As the drops began to pelt your face and shoulders, you turned to the boy closest to you and grabbed his jaw in your hands. 

“You mean it? Really, you’ll have me?”

“Y/n, it’s always been you - nobody else was an option” he confirmed, holding the hand you had placed on his face. 

The long-haired man in question moved the hand on your waist to your back, pulling you close to his face. And, finally, he kissed you. It was warm and comforting, you could ignore the rain pelting down on you because of the explosions of colour that were pulsing from your connected mouths. 

“Hey, stop hogging”

Koushi shouldered Asahi out of the way, not giving you a moment to breathe before plastering himself on you. You laughed into the kiss. It wasn’t as slow and passion filled as Asahi, but it was your Suga all over. Quick and hot and excited, he slid his hands to your waist and connected your hips together as you kissed. It was certainly a steaming first kiss and you were certainly not complaining. 

Daichi groaned next to you, clearly done with his excitable boyfriends antics. The resignation in his tone caused you to giggle and break the kiss - something that elicited a pout out of the man in your arms. 

Sawamura’s strong arms muscled you out of the grip of Suga. The strongest boyfriend was never one to be outdone, he had that firefighter, classic gentlemen energy and it showed in the way he held you. 

The brunette smiled, resting his forehead against yours. 

“It finally feels complete, we should’ve asked you about 5 years sooner than we did”

“To be fair, I did not make it easy for you, did i?” you cringed again. 

He chuckled, shaking his head and snaked his arms around your body. The two of you connected your lips together, moving against one another in a familiar way. Daichi’s kisses felt like the kisses you had seen in Disney movies when you were younger - soft, passionate and romantic. 

The rain was hammering down now, soaking your clothes and hair all the way through. You broke apart from Daichi when you heard cheering from the front of the rest stop.  

Kiyoko and Yachi stood at the entrance, an umbrella covering them. The smaller blonde was jumping up and down, her girlfriends arm wrapped loosely around her shoulders. Kiyoko made eye contact with you, nodding gently in approval. Smiling, you nodded back. 

You felt your cheeks warm and turned to hide your face in Suga’s shoulder. 

“Sooo” you started, “does this mean i have three boyfriends now, cause that’s gonna be hard to explain to the guys”

The three men in front of you chuckled.

“It’s none of their business for now” mused Koushi, nosing at your jaw. 

“We have a whole holiday to think about it, don’t we?” Asahi smiled down at you, “but boyfriends sounds good to us”

You nodded, smiling bashfully up at him. 

“Come on, let's get you into the car hmm?” Daichi asked, sliding an arm around your hips. 

— 

The white sheets crinkled from where they were tucked around your hips. The bed sheets of the villa you ended up at were crisp and starched, but the bed was warm around you like a cloud. The birds chirped outside, fluttering around the window in the morning sun and the fresh scent of coffee wafted in from the kitchen. It was heaven. 

Best of all was the tan arm wrapped around you and the smaller, paler arm rubbing up and down you back - getting dangerously low to where the sheets covered your hips. 

“Sugawara Koushi, you better be careful” you grumbled, sleep adding voice rising from your dent in the pillow. 

The man in question huffed behind you, stopping his hand just beneath Daichi’s arm on your waist. 

“Finally awake i see”

You snorted. 

“Yeah cause you can’t keep your hands to yourself” you mused, rolling onto your back. 

Daichi was very much still asleep next to you, the drive there must have taken it out of him because he was dead to the world - face down on the pillow snoring. A real shame considering you were now allowed to take full advantage of his shirtless sleeping policy. 

Suga slid over the bed towards you, pulling you by your hip towards him. Nuzzling his face into your neck, he began to plant soft, slow kisses up and down the column. You hummed, enjoying the blissful moment. 

“Oh - uh” came Asahi’s stutter from the door, “i got you guys coffee”

Suga snorted into your neck, the moment gone. Regardless, you found your tall and awkward partner adorable and reached out towards him. Partially for coffee, but mostly so he would join you on the bed. He smiled, slipping into the sheets beside your sleeping boyfriend and handing the coffees over to you. 

You held the warm coffee cup in your hands and levelled your gaze over all three of your partners, curled up in bed with you. Things were just how they were supposed to be.

finally!!! the end of an era look at us go!!! thank you for whoever stuck around for this I love you all dearly and I hope it didn't disappoint you. If a spicy epilogue is wanted... let me know ;).

[asrinchine]

Back to the Old House by the Smiths

And you never knew

How much I really liked you

Because I never even told you

Oh, and I meant to.

[iluvangel]

˚˖𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒✧˚.🎀༘⋆ 𝑴𝑰𝑵𝑰𝑳𝑰𝑺𝑻 ˚˖𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒✧˚.🎀༘⋆

• HAIKYUU •

• will be updated regularly

★ K A R A S U N O 🏐🐦‍⬛:

WHOLE TEAM ❗️

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★ N E K O M A 🏐🐈‍⬛:

★ A O B A J O H S A I 🏐🏰:

★ D A T E T E C H 🏐⛓️:

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★ F U K U R Ō D A N I 🏐🦉:

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•their reactions to u sleeping while cuddling a pillow

★ O T H E R 🏐:

( I don’t like their schools but I love these characters)

[leti666bigboss]

Hello!

I saw that you said you want to write for Haikyu! Could you please write about Asahi? Something like comforting reader while they are having a hard time, trying to cheer them up?

Use whatever form you prefer (headcanons or text)

Thank you and have a nice day 😄

featuring: azumane asahi

genre: supposed to be angst to fluff

warnings: school stress i guess

[fiorella-a]

Karasuno boys as... "Vampire" song lyrics!

(+ Short scenarios)

Info:

-future! Karasuno boys x gn! Reader

-No Tanaka, he's married after all 🤷🏻‍♀️

-toxic relationship

-cursing

-slight angst (i guess)

Daichi:

"I loved you truly

Gotta laugh at the stupidity"

"I should've known it was strange

You only come out at night"

>> You always found it weird that Daichi would go out around midnight or almost midnight, I'm talking about 10, 11 or 12PM and then come back an hour and a half later. God you hate yourself for falling into his trap when he assures you saying, "It's required for me to patrol around the area" or "you know I'm a police officer, babe" and due to your sincere love for him, you always did understand his responsibilities.

Although you can't help but notice that every time he comes back, he smells and looks.. fresh? Like he had just taken a shower and re-used his clothes.

Maybe he did take a shower with a girl he was giving an after care for. Maybe he was patrolling the area of his girl's apartment. But you can't do anything, you don't have enough evidence.

Sugawara:

"Cause I've made some real big mistakes

But you make the worst one look fine"

"You're so convincing

How do you lie without flinching?"

>> Sugawara gave you an extra key to his class just in case he locks the door and you wanted to visit him. Your relative, who goes to the school that he teaches, called you and told you how amazing his day was, you found it weird that Sugawara isn't home yet. "That's awesome, buddy! But I gotta go, alright? I'll call later on, bye-bye!"

Once you hung up, you drove as fast as you can to the school and came into his classroom without warning.

You saw a woman sitting on Suga's desk, while he has his right arm wrapped around her waist. The woman could only eye you up and down before turning to yell at Suga, "I thought you told them? Gosh Suga! We've been over this for what? A thousand time?!" The said woman jumped out of his grasp, pushed you aside and walked out while slamming the door behind her.

He scoffs at you before opening the door and chasing after the woman.

He left you, huh? Of course he did.

Asahi:

"Bleedin' me dry, like a goddamn vampire"

>> Being an apparel designer and someone who used to get nervous all the time, Asahi gets insecure about the things that he has or had created. He always yearns for your compliment and your opinion both for him and his designs.

And God did it drain you, always saying "you did a great job today, pretty boy" "look at this! One thing missing and after that, it'll be all perfect!" You acted more like his worker rather than his partner, to be honest.

Nishinoya:

"Ooh, what a mesmerizing, paralyzing, fucked-up little thrill

Can't figure out just how you do it, and God knows I never will"

>> Nishinoya takes you with him every time he goes travelling, he winks at you before saying, "It's my treat, love"

After a long day, you both headed onto a nearby hotel before resuming your adventures for tomorrow. The room was spacious, the balcony had the best view and you were busy day dreaming while Noya went into the hotel lobby to fetch you both some food and when he came back, he surprised you with your favorite meal!

You're so easy to distract that you missed the kiss mark on his temple and his neck.

Kageyama:

"The way you sold me for parts

As you sunk your teeth into me, oh

Bloodsucker, famefucker

Bleedin' me dry, like a goddamn vampire"

>> Kageyama kept your relationship very lowkey, he didn't wanna make you overwhelmed by the amount of fans and paparazzi that's on his back, but his team does know you.

When Kageyama is fast asleep, you grab his phone and tries to find one of his teammate's number and luckily, you did!

2:09 AM:

"Hi! Kageyama's girlfriend here, I got your number off of his phone. Can you please help me set up a party for him? Thank you and it's no biggie if you decline."

5:31 AM

"Hey, you have a different number? Gosh [random name] you didn't tell me sooner."

"I'm sorry you must've misunderstood, It's actually Y/n!"

"Oh, Y/n? Aren't you his one night stand? Please stop messaging me, i'm uncomfortable knowing Tobio has a girlfriend and you're trying to earn his attention. Thank you for the efforts of reaching out for me."

He kept you a secret because all they know is you were nothing but a fling to him.

Hinata:

"How's the castle built off people you pretend to care about?"

>> When Hinata got home from practice, he could tell that you were tired and he asked about your day, "Nothing much, just stressful customers always making a scene, you know?" You laugh at your words while Hinata looked into your eyes, "That's sad." He coughs "anyways my day was more stressful than yours, I–"

You spaced out while his rambling started.

Did he even put himself into your shoes?

Tsukishima:

"I used to think I was smart

But you made me look so naive"

"And every girl I ever talked to told me you were bad, bad news

You called them crazy, God, I hate the way I called them crazy too"

>> Tsukishima has you wrapped around his fingers and he knows it. He made you so dependent on him that he knows you can't even go on a day without telling him stories. Gosh he loves the way you're so easy to manipulate! you could've lent in some time for the girls to explain themselves but no, you took his words.

What a fool.

Yamaguchi:

"Went for me, and not her

'Cause girls your age know better"

>> Yamaguchi likes someone from his class, but when you confessed to him, he can't help but accept it out of pity. And Yamaguchi successfully shaped you into his crush. Making you trim your hair, dress in a different aesthetic and even changing the way you talk, just for him. And gosh when you saw the way he looked at the person he liked, you noticed something similar about them.

Everything. You're like that person's mirror.

[stxrmylxve]

Hello!

I saw your post about requesting stuff to write about so here I am. Could you maybe write about how Azumane Asahi or Hanma Shuji would try to cheer up or help reader after or during an anxiety attack? Feel free to choose one, I just put both of them there because they are my comfort characters.

Thank you 🌻

Sure! Apologies about the attack, I have never had one so it was hard to recreate... sorry they're so short!

HANMA (during):

"Hey y/n, do you need anything from the store-"

You were clutching your chest, propping yourself up on your bed with your phone long forgotten but left on beside you. You were gasping for air, tears pricked slightly at the corner of your eyes.

"Y/n?" he asks, walking towards you and placing a hand on the small of your back, but all he was met with were trembles.

He had no clue what to do. He pulled you into his embrace, petting your hair as your tears continued to stain his expensive suit. He had never seen you like this before, but one glance at your phone and he could see the horrible things said there and understood.

"What they said isn't true, don't worry." he whispers as he pecks your forehead, your trembling starting to fade and tears began to dry.

"But what if-"

"They're not. Drop it." he says darkly as you giggle and sniff.

ASAHI (after):

You were tapping your fingers on the counter, something you normally never did unless you were anxious.

"What's up?" asahi says, startling you as you turn around.

"Nothing.." you say, shaking your head slightly to where your hair covered more of your already red eyes.

"You cried," he notes as you look away, proving his point, "Why?"

"A girl spreaded a rumor about me. It's alright, I did my stupid breakdown and I'm fine now." you mutter to yourself, shifting awkwardly in your seat as you returned back to his soft gaze.

"You could have come to me. We could have talked. I never want you to go through an attack by yourself again." he says as he brushed your hair back to where it wasn't shadowing your face with a smile.

"You had things to do." you deadpan.

"I can always make time for you."

[shxtodxroki]

Asahi Azumane Masterlist

Here is where you will find all of my writing for Asahi! I hope you enjoy, and if you like these feel free to drop a request in my inbox at any time! <3

♡ Headcanons ♡

- Karasuno Boys When You Prank Them By Dodging Their Kisses (3.1k)

[blossominghunnie]

𝐙𝐨𝐦𝐛𝐢𝐞 𝐀𝐩𝐨𝐜𝐚𝐥𝐲𝐩𝐬𝐞

Day 2

Pairing: Hamada Asahi x fem!oc

Genre: Horror, zombie apocalypse au, all of us are dead inspired

Summary: One day Haneul was a normal student and the next she was running from zombies with her almost boyfriend, her friends and classmates, trying to survive.

Warning: Cussing, mentions of death, blood, zombies

Notes: Had to include a zombie apocalypse jsjs.

Haneul never imagined her junior year of high school to go like this. She was supposed to keep her good grades, and have a great time with her friends, before applying to her dream school to study medicine.

But life had other plans, she supposed.

Instead, she, Asahi, her friend group and some classmates were running from the eating flesh monsters they’ve been calling zombies.

“Hurry, get in here!” Someone shouted as they opened the door to a classroom on the third floor.

“Come on, come on!”

“AH!” Haneul heard someone scream, she was in the middle of the group so she had to jump a little to see who it was.

Horrified, she turned around and started weeping. She felt a hand intertwining with hers. “Are you okay? What happened?”

She couldn’t speak until almost all were safe and sound on the classroom.

“Hayun was bitten.” She started crying.

“Oh, honey.” He hugged her tightly. “I’m so sorry.”

The girl couldn’t believe it, she lost her best friend since she was 3.

“I know it’s tough but you know I’m always here for you.”

“Thank you, Sahi.” She hugged him tightly.

“Anytime, Hannie.”

Days passed and more friends and classmates were transformed to zombies, reducing the once big group to a small group of 7; Haneul, Asahi, Junkyu, Jeongwoo, Yoshi, Jihoon and Jaehyuk.

The moral was too low because of this but if they wanted to keep surviving they needed a new plan.

“I know we are devastated cause of the losses we’ve had but we need to keep moving.” Jihoon spoke looking at his remaining friends.

“Ji is right, we can morn once we are safe.” Jaehyuk backed him up.

“Alright, what’s the plan?” Asahi asked from his place against the wall. Haneul was cuddled up on his right arm, looking dissociated. The past couple of days hadn’t been the best. She was fine one minute and the next she felt like shit.

She was grateful the blonde never left her side.

She had a “complicated” relationship with Asahi. They weren’t a couple but they definitely weren’t friends. They were very touchy with the other, at least in private he was too. In public he limited himself to hand holding and hugging.

He was planning on asking her to be his girlfriend when all hell broke loose. She meant everything to him and wanted to make things official.

He would have to do it once this mess was over.

Anyway, the group agreed to leave the classroom at sunrise, and head straight to the woods where they would look for a shelter for survivors.

Thankfully it was raining by the time they had to go, which meant it would make zombies go numb and it would be easier for them to walk pass them.

They carefully speed walked and killed any creature that tried to attack them.

Asahi had Haneul by the hand and tried his best for her to not see any of her dead friends, she was pretty sensitive so he knew seeing them again and in that state would break her even more.

They successfully made it to the woods without getting hurt.

That was until they reached a street, and walked farther. There, they saw a big amount of zombies.

Freaking out, they hold their weapons tighter and pointed to their heads.

They were struggling but had a good pace so they didn’t come too close to them.

Until Asahi got distracted for a second.

“ASAHI! LOOK OUT.” Haneul shouted, not caring that more zombies could come.

By the time he turned around one bit him on the leg.

“NO!” The girl cried hard and ran to help him. She killed the pest and held the blonde, placing him on the floor.

“You’re gonna be okay, love.” She repeated over and over, it felt as if it was more to comfort herself than for the Japanese.

Meanwhile he just looked at her with glassy eyes. He caressed her cheek softly.

“Thank you for everything, princess. I never got to tell you but I wanted to make you my girl and that I also love you so so much.” A tear fell slowly as he finished what he thought were gonna be his final words.

“I love you so much too, Sahi. And I would have loved to be your girlfriend.” She sobbed and hugged him tightly.

“Han, we have to go. There’s more coming.” Yoshi worriedly said.

“B-but I can’t leave him.”

“We have to, I’m sorry.” He looked at her with a sad expression.

“But it doesn’t look like he’s transforming. He could be a hambie.” She insisted, calling him a term that one of their late friends used to describe a psycho classmate that tried to kill them at the beginning of the crisis.

He sighted. “Okay, but if he turns we’ll need to kill him. Now come on, let’s get out of here.”

She nodded and grabbed the blonde with the help of Jeongwoo. Putting his arms around their shoulders.

They continued their journey until they saw a jail that was being used as a Safe Zone.

The doctors there ran some tests, asked them a few questions and in no time they were on their own tents, located by the quarantine zone.

The pair was laying down on the mattress that was provided to them, cuddling. Haneul had her head on his chest and Asahi had his arm around her waist.

Turns out, he indeed was a hambie. He was perfectly fine, so far.

The blonde asked the girl the long awaited question right after they settled so, they could proudly say they were finally dating.

Them and their friends could feel like everything was okay, at last.

But only time would tell what was going to happen next.

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

5 Days Halloween Challenge masterlist || Treasure masterlist || Main masterlist

[sleepingnova]

Estrangement.

the feeling that you do not belong, especially if you are around a group of people.

pairing : sawamura daichi, sugawara koshi, azumane asahi x reader (Poly ship)

summary : With daichi and asahi's birthdays being only a day apart, it seems like both boys have the birthday blues. Reader is a bit on the stoic side, very chill and not very emotional. Both boys are sadge :(

warnings : A bit of swearing, mentions of smoking, familial issues, mentions of being depressed, mentions of being suicidal

genre : angst to fluff (hurt to comfort)

author's note : I thought of this last night, a small scenario that fits perfectly for a specific few headcanons I have for both boys. With that being said, enjoy. btw I rambled, a lot in this. It's long as shit. So for all my readers who love long angst, here you go. *kith* :>

As the clock hits midnight, the stars twinkle above you. The day shifts from the 31st of December to the 1st of January. You had already given your present to Daichi, and now was Asahi's turn. The three of them walked onto the balcony with you. The strong smell of marijuana from your bong could be smelled from your room.

"Hello, my love." The oldest one of the 3 spoke softly. You could tell something was wrong, he sounded like he had a hitch in his throat.

You blew out the smoke from your mouth and inhaled it into your nose.

"Hello, darling boy, happy birthday, my sweet boy. What should we do later today for your birthday? I know, let's go out for lunch, for yours and daichi's birthday. I know we went out yesterday for your birthday, 'mura, but I just like spoiling my sweet partners, is that so wrong?" You rambled on, your words slowing and slurring around just a little because of the marijuana.

You leaned in for a kiss towards Azumane, but was stopped.

"Um, why don't we head inside, it's a little cold. I don't want you to get sick." Asahi spoke, just barely above a whisper.

You nodded and walked back inside your room. Once you sat back down onto your bed, you spoke up.

"Alright, I may be high, but I'm not an idiot. Asahi, you sound and look like you've been crying, 'mura, you too. What's wrong? I'm always here if you need to talk to me, you know." You spoke, placing your lighter and bong on your dresser.

"It's nothing, really sweetheart, we promise, just Dai and I have been having a few issues. We just don't want to bother you with them. We know when you smoke, you aren't in the right mental headspace." Asahi replied.

You sat up and put your things away.

"Well, no not necessarily, sweetheart. I'll always have time to listen to you. Go ahead, tell me what's going on in those pretty minds of yours, both of you. Koshi, you're welcome to vent to me if you would like as well." You explained.

Asahi sighed hesitantly, and began. "When you look at me it's like you don't see me. I fell in love with you the moment I saw you, but you've changed so much, so now I feel like I don't know who you are anymore."

He looked around the room, practically at everything but you. Your gaze was set, tears forming in your eyes and your throat closing as he continued, "What happened to you, my love? Where have you gone? I miss the old you, please, if you're in there, I want you back. I need you back. Come back to me, please, darling." His eyes were glossy and filled with tears, until he looked at you while glancing around and was filled with regret.

He never meant to make you cry, he never wished to be the cause of your tears, but there you were. The silence that followed was suffocating, both of your minds racing, you were speechless, had your weed addiction gotten that bad? Could you even call it an addiction?

Sure, it was your mind - numbing thing, you used it every now and then, and everything that happened in that time was mushed around in your brain. What had he seen? Was there more to this than you thought?

You reached towards his hands, but he pulled them away. He slowly reached back to intertwine your hands together. "I need you to tell me what you've been seeing. Please, what have I been doing wrong? Talk to me, don't be scared, you're not going to hurt my feelings by being honest." You were wiping your eyes, your mind was spinning and you felt like throwing up.

His thoughts and mind were racing, his first instinct was to comfort you, to tell you he was sorry and that he loved you. But you said that he should be honest right? He's always honest, but maybe this time he was too honest?

His hand rubbed against the back of his neck as he thought about just giving in. He knew this was best for a relationship to thrive, communication, it's just he didn't think it'd be so... empty of love or warmth. He pondered continuing, but something just told him to keep going, and get it off his chest. He felt like he couldn't breathe.

"I don't know.. I just feel so invisible around you now. Whenever I'm here, I try and be intimate with you and hold your hand and stuff, but you always push me away." He recalled, as he watched and felt the grip of your hand tighten around his.

"You've never shown signs of not liking pda, so what changed? Whenever I talk, I always get the feeling that you're not listening to me. You don't come on dates anymore, either, and it's not just me who's noticed that one." He was bringing up point after point and you didn't know what to do or where to begin to explain that this is all just a big misunderstanding.

"My anxiety is eating me alive right now, and I never want to ask this, ever, and God, I hope it isn't true. Tell me I'm overthinking, please anything. You're all I have left, baby, please don't you leave too." He sobbed, his throat closing and he coughs. After what feels like forever in silence, he begins to speak again.

"I'm just going to ask before I puke, have you ever fallen out of love with us? Has there ever been a time where you stopped loving us? If you have, I understand, but please, I'm begging you, I'll get down on my knees if I have to, please don't leave just yet. I've lost just about everyone and everything, I can't lose you too. Not yet." He sniffled, his heart skipping beats and his breathing heavy and rapid.

His tears fell onto your hands as you looked at him, with your eyes and mouth open in shock. Every heart warming memory replaying in your mind, each one longer than the last. This was it. You had waited for so long, for someone who would love you as an equal, who'd treat you with respect, someone who wouldn't use you, whether that be for your intelligence or body or anything really. You had a grasp on it, and it was...over? No, it can't be over, not after you wasted so much time trying to find it.

Your tears kept falling and your throat kept closing, your silent words falling on deaf ears. After a while of silence, you held your head up to face him. His eyes searched yours for some sort of comfort, some kind of sign, something that told him that this was all a mistake.

Your depression had gotten the best of you, which was why you started smoking in the first place. Just to make life a little easier to bear. It prevented you from going out and being social, from being you. The one Azumane cherished and loved so dearly.

"I- No." You stumbled, not knowing where to start. There was so much you wanted to say, but you never knew how. Your throat started to open up again as you breathed, and with that, you tried to explain to him why you were the way you were.

"I was diagnosed with severe depression a couple months ago, and it hasn't been the best. The antidepressants make things worse and I feel like I am outside my body. I've smoked before, and it felt good, so I thought it was the best option. I didn't realize how much it was hurting you." Your tears were falling, but you decided to get everything out, it was now or never.

"It came to the point where I couldn't get out of bed, I would go days at a time without brushing my teeth or showering. I wasn't just depressed, I was suicidal. I didn't want to go through this everyday. I was put on suicide watch twice in a month. I hated everything part of it, and I wanted to see you guys, I thought that would make me feel better, but I realized I never told you guys." You continued to explain as you saw all of their eyes widen at you in horror and guilt.

You hesitated before continuing, "It made me so sad to see suga posting and texting me pictures of your dates' and all the stuff you guys would do and I wasn't able to be there, much less respond. They'd take my phone while I was there and I couldn't get it back until I left."

You coughed and caught your breath, before speaking again, but sawamura stopped you.

"Babe, stop. You don't need to keep explaining. We are so sorry. We never knew you were going through so much, but please, if something like this happens, tell us please." He desperately whispered, his tears falling down his face as he walked over to you. He sat down and gave you a hug, snuggling his face in the crook of your neck, sobbing out apologies.

You felt your heart beating in your stomach, as you ran your fingers through his hair, trying to calm him down. You turned your head over towards asahi, who's mouth was open, but nothing came out.

You shook your head before whispering, "Don't apologize, none of you need to apologize to me. This was my fault. I owe you an apology, asahi." You said before clearing your throat, and resuming.

"My dear asahi, I am so terribly sorry that I kept this from you and led you to this false narrative of myself. I was too lost in my own head to be able to communicate with you about what was going on. I'm so sorry for making you feel invisible or that I didn't love you, I am not using my depression as an excuse, so please don't think I am. I want to be clear when I say this, and I want all three of you to know this: I have never fallen out of love with the three of you, I swear it. I have never thought about it or will in the future." You sniffled as you rambled on but finally concluding your apology.

Azumane and Sawamura looked up at you, their eyes bloodshot and puffy, as they both squeaked out the question, "You promise?"

You replied without a second thought, "Yes, for eternity. I will love all of you until we're old and gray and we look like raisins."

They all chuckled softly, asahi and sugawara coming over to embrace the two of you.

"This has been a lot of back and forth, can we please rest? We can go out for breakfast as an official first date into our renewed relationship." Koshi declared, the two other boys nodding in agreement.

You glanced over at your window, so much time had passed, and the sun was just starting to come up. You looked at your clock, which showed 5:47am.

After staring into the darkness of your room for a couple of minutes, you were brought back by asahi intertwining his hand with yours, but when you looked over, the three boys were all fast asleep, entangled in each other's arms.

After sleeping the day away, you all slowly but surely got up to get ready for your date. You got dressed and freshened up, brushed your teeth all nice and clean. As you looked in the mirror, you couldn't help but stare in shock.

Asahi came up behind you and looked in the mirror with you, a small frown forming on his face.

"What's wrong, my love?" He asked, kissing your cheek.

"Is that me? That's me. Oh my gosh." You sniffled. It had been so long since you actually were excited about dressing up and putting on makeup.

"Yes, darling. It's you and you're so beautiful." He replied, pulling out his phone.

"What're you doing?" You questioned, as you saw him look down at his phone.

"Hm? Oh nothing, just making sure suga and daichi are ready to go. Let's go, shall we?" He asked, holding his hand out.

You smiled, a genuine smile, and he could see your face light up, something it hadn't done in a while, and he just melted seeing how excited you were.

"Daichi? Baby boy, you ready to go?" Azumane called.

"Dai?" He tried again after hearing no response.

"Let me go see what's taking so long." He stated, walking away from you and sugawara.

Daichi was in the bathroom, fixing his shirt collar when he just happened to look into the mirror. Had his face gotten fatter? He looked like he gained a lot of weight. His family was right, he did lose track of himself.

'No, no it's fine. I'm okay, I look fine. But, my face looks so fat and chubby. Who am I kidding? They wouldn't date me! Not like this. Maybe I should just stay-' He was pulled out of his thoughts by Asahi knocking on the door.

"Hey, you okay in there? Do you need any help?" He asked, while walking behind him, his hands sliding down his waist, wrapping around Daichi's hips.

"It's nothing, it's just.. Does this make me look fat? Does my face look chubby? God, I look so ugly, what am I thinking." Daichi muttered, turning his head away in shame.

Asahi's eyes widened, he had never heard Sawamura be so concerned about his looks.

"What? No, babe, you look so handsome. You look perfectly fine. Yeah, your face is a bit chubby, but so is the rest of you, which I love and I wouldn't change one bit." Asahi replied.

"My family was right, I should lose some weight. It doesn't look good." He retorted, dropping his head in regret.

"Baby, listen to me. You said yourself that you prefer being chubby than having an athletic figure. We're going to support you no matter what you want to do. You shouldn't listen to what your family says, they're not always right, ya know?" Asahi responded, cupping Daichi's face in his hands.

Daichi smiled softly, and leaned his head onto Asahi's shoulder. He hummed softly, before standing and kissing Asahi, as a thank you before walking back towards you and Sugawara.

Asahi smiled, and walked over.

"We should take a picture! Something to remember!" Sugawara chimed.

"We all look nice, why not?" You added.

You all went outside and stood in front of your house, the sun shining brightly.

Asahi grabbed his polaroid, and aimed it perfectly.

"Alright, everyone, smile!" He said while hopping into the photo.

The camera clicked and the photo looked perfect. Asahi slipped the photo into his phone case and hopped into the car, along with the three of you, ready to start fresh.

For the first time in a while, you felt good. You felt..happy. You felt like you again, the one that they fell in love with.

They wouldn't have it any other way.

hope you guys enjoy, comment "bee" if you got this far, this was a bit long.

[taones]

If You Can Hold On (2) - A.A, S.K, S.D

rewrite of the second part of the series (first part here and original series on my masterlist) enjoy <3

pairing ~ poly asadaisuga x gn!reader

warnings ~ pining, angst, Daichi sleeps shirtless bc c'mon now, reader is in the pool being sad but no mentions of drowning! not edited bc I'm lazy

Soft murmurs woke you from your restless sleep. After their last conversation, it had obviously been hard for you to get any good rest. The car rolled to a stop inside a motel car park, bathing you and its other occupants in the red sign light. 

“I went in but they only have one room so the four of us will have to share”

The disappointment in Daichi’s tone was palpable, like an arrow through your heart. You guys were best friends, you had obviously shared rooms and beds before. Why would it matter now? Ever since you had known them you had been comfortable sharing beds etc, even after they started dating. The fact it was different now obviously made you think back to the conversation you overheard. Maybe the person they were adding didn’t like you or they thought it would be inappropriate considering they were courting another person. 

You felt Asahi shift beside you and slammed your eyes shut once again. 

There was no way you were letting them know you were awake. If you had to face them before you fully calmed down, there was no question on if you would end up crying. Also you deeply did not want to give Asahi his hoodie back. There was a lingering feeling in your mind that you would never have an opportunity to steal it again. A sharp twinge of panic rocketed through your stomach at the thought. Of course, there was a chance their new s/o wouldn’t mind, but not many people were comfortable with their partner being that close to someone else. 

“It’s okay” Asahi soothed, “i’ll carry them”

Yeah, like you were going to let that happen. If any one of the three men touched you right now you were sure to burst into tears. Deciding that was the best time to break your facade, you pretended to stir. You hoped the red lights didn’t reflect on the glimmer of tears in your eyes. The cold, wet gravel seeped through the mesh of your shoes as the boys started leading you towards the room. No noise was made apart from the crunches under your feet - small victories, you mused to yourself. You adjusted your bags in your hand so you could grab the room key from Daichi’s hand. It was bronze in colour with a red plastic tag, slightly faded but you were able to make out the number 32 on the front. Locating the room, you were quick to pull away from the rest of the fatigued group, finding it easy to speed away from the sleep-addled men under the guise of dinding some comfort from the rain. Behind you, Daichi held his hand to his chest as if your hasty touch had scalded him. You chewed on your lip slightly, feeling bad at the upset you might have caused. Only hoping he would take it as you being tired, you shifted your gaze to the room door and marched on. 

-

The room itself was painted a gaudy yellow, with a brown patterned carpet that had obviously been unchanged since the motel itself was built. There was a large bed in the middle of the room, big enough for the four of you easily, but your eyes were driven to the sofa to the side of it. It was a loud red, sticking out sorely from the rest of the room. The harsh red was an assault on your retinas. How fitting, you thought to yourself. Scoffing, you laid your bags on the couch, pulling out some shorts and one of Koushi’s t-shirts to sleep in - rushing into the bathroom to change as soon as the other men walked in. 

Thinking you had escaped, you sighed and leant against the door. Only to hear the voices of the three men loud and clear. The thought of escaping out of the tiny bathroom window became suddenly very tempting. 

“I wonder what’s wrong with y/n” Koushi asked, seemingly dismissive.

“I’m sure we’ll find out soon, they don’t hide anything from us” 

You scoffed again under your breath, if only they knew. Still, you couldn;t fault Daichi for comforting his partner. 

“Wait look what I took the other day Suga, it’ll cheer you up”

You heard Azumane pull out his phone and then a resounding ‘aww’ from the grey haired man.

“I wish we could ask them to join us sooner but we have to wait till we’re back huh?” Suga lamented, “wish this trip could be over already” 

Ouch, that one hurt.

He was obviously showing a photo of this mystery person. You really didn’t understand why they hadn’t told you yet. It wasn’t like they could predict your horrible reaction, or that they even knew about your feelings. It made the doubtful pit in your stomach grow and twist, pulling you into a nauseous state. If they really wanted this to be over so soon after it began, there was really no point in you staying. They were obviously preoccupied with this other person - it was like you were never even there to begin with. 

A knock on the bathroom door made you jolt. Reluctantly, you peered at yourself in the dirty mirror and cringed at the sight. There were tear tracks dried onto your skin and your eyes were rimmed with an irritated colour. The sadness couldn’t be more obvious. Hastily, you rinsed your face in the sink, patting it down with your t-shirt. Taking a moment to breath and calm yourself, you turned the door knob. 

Daichi’s concerned face met you on the other side. Well, there goes being inconspicuous. You shot him what you hoped was a reassuring grin and pushed past his shoulder slightly. It was obvious he wanted to say something to you, but he stayed silent. They all watched you hastily grab a blanket off of the end of the bed and reach for the door. Not looking back you called behind you.

“I’ll be right back i just have to, uh, make a call so don’t wait up”

Well done, very convincing, you mused as you shut the door behind you. 

The gravel once again let the damp seep into you. Cold air prickled the skin on your legs while you walked towards your destination. Like all good motels, there was a pool a little bit away from your room, cold and full of rain water from the earlier weather, but it was a welcomed solace from the suffocating presence of the room. It was dimly lit but had no cover, so you assumed nobody would yell at you for using it. The water was surprisingly clear and cold from the earlier rain. Perfect for you to dangle your legs in while you waited there. Rain always calmed you when your thoughts were racing and you assumed the pool would work the same way. Relationships and people might change to you but water, the feeling of it moving over your skin, that would always be the same. 

You thought back to one of your earliest memories with all three of the boys, after you had come to the realisation you were hopelessly in love with all three. It was during first year, towards the end of the summer months, when the leaves had begun to tinge into soft yellows and deep reds. The rain had started pouring that day unexpectedly, breaking through the muggy weather that the last three months had left behind. The icy cold raindrops were a welcome feeling on your heated skin. All three of you had ran from volleyball practice to the courtyard outside, spreading your arms towards the sky like uniform-donned angels - thanking the sky for it’s gift. Of course, you had all got soaked but you smiled even after you had all separated to walk home. 

Simpler times, you thought to yourself sarcastically. The feelings had been so new and exciting at the time, hardly the depressing lingering in the back of your mind as it had been recently. There had come a time in school, you’re not sure when, where you had sort of accepted it would never happen and promptly gave up. Whether this was before or after the three announced their relationship, you had forgotten. Not that it mattered either way. 

Reflections in the water rippled when you dipped your legs into the surface. You stared as your reflection was distorted, mussed about in the small waves. The water settled once again and you were left with the cold, hard truth of the image you had become. Your rimmed eyes and tear tracks seemed to only accentuate the already exhausted look on your face. It was as if you hadn’t slept in weeks. Suga liked describing the sparkle in your eyes when you got excited about something - apparently it reminded him of a snowglobe or something, whatever he had said. You sighed, meeting your own eyes in the water. They were empty of any sparkle. 

You swished your legs around the water again, a weight lifting off your shoulders as your face was contorted once again by the waves. 

A ringtone rang out from next to you and you scrambled to shut it off. Bringing the phone up to your ear, you were met with the soothing (if not minorly monotone) voice of your club manager and best friend. 

“Hello?” you sniffed into the receiver. 

Luckily for you, Kiyoko had escaped your seemingly never ending list of crushes. She had been a fast friend when you had met and, luckily for her, she was currently driving somewhere around the Japanese countryside with her girlfriend. 

The dark-haired girl was also one of the only people in the world that knew your secret. Which was most likely the reason for her phoning. 

“How are you holding up y/n?”

You scoffed. 

“As good as i can i suppose” you joked, shoulders tensing at the lack of response. 

“Okay, i’m doing horribly, i swear they’re doing it on purpose”

She hummed, never one for many words. 

“Did you know they wanted to add another person to their relationship? They won’t talk about it when they think i’m awake but i caught them in the car. They seem so,  so excited and i hate that i can’t just be happy for them”

Gnawing on your lip, you waited for a response.

“Do you need  us to come pick you up?” she questioned, almost hesitantly. 

You stopped and thought about it. Was it the best idea for you to stay? There was a feeling poking at the back of your brain that this trip would go horribly wrong but you weren’t too sure it would be the best idea to leave either. There was no real excuse you could give the boys and you had been planning this for a while. Chewing on your thumbnail, you made a choice. 

“I don’t think you need to get me” you began, “i’ll see how it goes but, uh, be on standby i guess”

A melodic hum rang from down the phone. You weren’t sure what it’s inflection was. 

The call ended quite quickly after that. It was expected, the hour was late and Kiyoko definitely had better things to do than audibly observing her friend having a breakdown. It would be a lie to say you didn’t sound as pathetic as you looked. The rain had started falling again towards the end of your conversation so you had stuffed your phone in your pocket and hugged the worn blanket tighter around your bare arms. 

You had failed to see a shock of cropped, brunette hair disappearing behind your room door.

The cold rain drizzled down your scalp and down your neck, leaving goosebumps in it’s wake. The rain seemed to peel some of the pressure of of your shoulders. It gave you something to focus on so that you didn’t have to think so hard for a while. Quieting the thoughts spinning round your head like whirlpools. Closing your eyes, you laid back on the wet tile and imagined spinning your hands around in the frigid water, creating your own whirlpools. Ones so powerful you could jump right in and they would suck you away from the motel - to wherever you wanted to go. Maybe you could stay underwater for a while, away from everyone. Kiyoko was a strong swimmer, she could bring you food and company. Maybe you could make some less complicated friends with the fish and little crabs that lived on the seafloor. 

When you peeled open your wet eyelids, your reality confronted you like a slap to the face. The motel was still the motel, and the pool's surface remained unchanged. 

“y/n!” yelled a voice from behind you. 

Rolling your eyes, you peered up from between your lashes. Suga had run out of the room, holding one of his partners' jackets above him in a mockery of a shelter from the rain. You would think he would have the sensibility to choose a waterproof one. 

His shoulders were drawn close to his body under his knitted cardigan, silvery brows drawn close to each other. There wasn’t much exchanged between the two of you but the worry on his features was hard to miss. You suppose you did look somewhat like a corpse at the time. Even worse - a cold, damp one. Even now, you looked back up towards the sky and snorted at your own silliness, as if they were even thinking about that. 

-

Asahi looked at the exchange from the winder, choosing to accompany his boyfriend outside when he saw your body twist and return to its previous position. Being one of the more sensibly dressed of your group - he grabbed a parka and headed out next to the shorter man, perching his chin on Suga’s shoulder. 

“I wish i knew what was going on in their head sometimes” Asahi commented from next to Koushi’s ear. 

His voice was soft enough and they were far enough away that you couldn’t hear them. In all fairness, without facing them anyone would have been completely unaware that they were talking. They both observed your sodden state, noticing your eyelids fluttering closed as you slipped off to sleep. 

“I would love to know how on earth they can sleep in this weather” Koushi commented dryly, “they’re going to catch their death because of the damn rain one of these days”

The brunette chuckled, wrapping his arms around his lover’s waist. Asahi had a comforting effect on almost anyone that truly knew him. A real gentle giant, his presence had the ability to both command attention and become a bean of solace for anyone that needed it. It was hard not to feel comfortable around Asahi Azumane. Something his boyfriend could attest to enthusiastically as his shoulders finally withdrew from next to his ears.

“They seemed happier out here in the rain than they have on the entire trip so far”

If he hadn’t been right next to his jaw, there is no way the taller man would’ve heard Koushi’s bitter muttering. And some part of him wished he didn’t, because then he wouldn't have to face the fact that his statement was entirely true. Even now, as you drifted off into sleep, the smile that had been missing the entire trip had somewhat returned to your face. It was refreshing to see but the two men only wished they had been the cause, not a weather pattern. The lines of your body were less harsh, less bunched up into each other. Your limbs hung loose on the tiles and the water instead of coiling and wrapping around each other like fishing line - the desperate attempt to make yourself smaller had not gone unnoticed by your companions. 

Asahi bit his lip. 

“We should get them inside” came the sleep-addled voice of their third and final partner. 

Daichi was dressed the least sensibly of all of them, only wearing a pair of chequered pyjama pants. Of course, as he was leaning in the doorway and not actually outside, there was no need for much else. A flower of guilt had bloomed in the pit of his stomach at overhearing the other two’s conversation. Your behavior had not gone unnoticed by him, but he had initially assumed you were just tired. It was overtly obvious to him now that something was very wrong. 

The three men trudged the small distance to your snoozing figure, not caring much if they got soaked. Daichi sat you up next to the pool as the other two worked on drying your chlorine-coated legs. The coarse fabric of the towels did little to disturb your slumber, only causing your knees to draw up to your chest and a small hum to escape your parted lips. The gaze of the shorter brunette man would probably have burnt holes in your skin had you been awake at the time. However, the contentment of your slumber went undisturbed and you turned your face into his bare chest, snuggling into it. 

part two is up! i've already finished part three so I will hopefully post that tomorrow <3 reblogs and comments are always appreciated, stay sexy!

[yunwangja]

touch - tobio kageyama oneshot

kageyama feels jealous as he notices that the other karasuno members can be physically affectionate with you while he struggles to do the same, thanks to your hesitation whenever he tries to get close.

genre: slight drama? romantic angst? its kageyama being frustrated so ig yeah, also eventual fluff

tags: kageyama x fem!reader, high school friends to lovers

warnings/notes: swearing, honestly that's it lol. also THIS IS MY FIRST TIME SORRY IF ITS LACKING /,,,,: i tried my best for them to be in character too so if not mb >< also approx. 1.2k words

kageyama’s thoughts had been swirling lately, a tumult of confusion and frustration. and it was all because of you.

he found himself watching you more often than he cared to admit, noticing every smile exchanged, every casual touch with other members of the volleyball team that seemed effortless. midterms and practices passed in a blur, overshadowed by his own internal questioning.

why did he feel like you were avoiding him so subtly? why did simple interactions feel like navigating a minefield? happenings from days ago has been haunting him, your subtle movements away from him echoing in his mind.

he wanted to be closer to you, and understand why you seemed so distant whenever he tries to. only thing was: he’s bad at this. he’s bad at expressing his feelings and making a mess of himself, especially in front of you. how could he do this so naturally when you keep on backing away?

"y/n-chan! you’re here!" hinata exclaimed joyfully, bounding over to greet you. oh right, i’m in practice. kageyama thought and snapped back to reality, mainly because of hinata’s loud announcement of your arrival, and well, because, it’s you.

his head snapped towards the gym entrance, catching your smile as you exchanged greetings with hinata.

"how was midterms?" sugawara approached you and asked kindly, prompting a hesitant response from you, "uh, they were fine, i think. hehe." the third year patted your head comfortingly, "i'm sure you did great."

kageyama's chest tightened slightly at the gesture, his irritation simmering beneath his composed exterior as he focused on his serves.

"wow, tobio, you're as consistent as ever," daichi commented seeing his performance, with asahi nodding in agreement. you managed to wave to kageyama from beside yachi, and he nodded in acknowledgment before returning to his practice.

practice officially began with a three-on-three match: tanaka, sugawara, and asahi against hinata, kageyama, and tsukishima. you stood near tanaka's team and cheered enthusiastically as he spiked, "nice kill, tanaka-senpai!"

tanaka grinned proudly and threw an arm around your shoulders, basking in your praise. “it’s nothing, y/n!”

kageyama's frustration flared again. why can't i do that too? kageyama wondered silently.

he decides to lash it out on tsukishima, pushing him to block their spikes better - to which the tall teammate responded with an exasperated roll of his eyes.

it all started a few days ago - you were having lunch on the rooftop with hinata and kageyama. hinata was engrossed in his own thoughts, while kageyama had this plan to subtly get closer to you, unsure and hesitant about being too forward. he wasn't particularly skilled at these things.

as kageyama inched closer, you immediately noticed and instinctively pulled back a bit, nervously remarking, "oh, is the sun shining on your side?" even though the weather was perfect and there was no sunlight. kageyama glanced down and replied, "uh, no... yeah, thanks. you didn't have to move unless it's cramped for you."

"no, as long as you have enough space," you awkwardly chuckled, trying to ease the panic you felt and continued eating.

kageyama sighed inwardly, contemplating another approach. he just wanted to be more gentle and affectionate towards you, just like the others do. hell, maybe, more than they do.

while you were sipping your beverage, you happened to try blueberry-flavored milk for the first time. "this is an interesting flavor," you remarked.

"really? what brand is it?" kageyama asked, attempting to hold your hand with the milk carton while leaning closer to you, making his face close to yours.

once again, you panic and quickly hand him the carton instead, "i-i don't know. you can check it yourself." you stood up to gather your things, suggesting, "let's go now," with hinata obediently following. he urged kageyama to hurry up as he remained on the floor with the now-empty blueberry milk carton.

from that moment, thoughts began to swirl in kageyama's mind—why did you keep avoiding him? was he making you uncomfortable? did you not like being close to him? was he being too much?

walking back to your classrooms, kageyama was stopped in his thoughts when he noticed hinata subtly linking his arm with yours. "y/n-chan! look!" hinata excitedly pointed out a stall being set up outside the window for the upcoming school festival.

you squealed with excitement and both of you jumped up and down, holding hands. kageyama couldn't help but notice the contrast—why was it okay for hinata to touch you like this, but not him? was he doing something wrong? did you dislike him?

"aren't you excited, kageyama?" hinata's question pulled him back from his thoughts. he quickly masked his inner turmoil and casually walked past both of you, muttering, "i don't care", making hinata complain about his lack of school spirit, while you just giggled in response.

back in the present, you continued cheering for tanaka's team after your interaction with him, prompting hinata to playfully pout, "y/n-chan, cheer for us too!"

you laughed and nodded, encouraging everyone with a big smile. “do your best too, hinata! tsukishima, kageyama!” kageyama would normally be melting inside, but today his mind was all over the place, frustrated. this drove him to be set on winning.

i don’t need to be close to you. i don’t even need your cheers. he resolved silently (and pettily), i'll prove it. and he did.

as practice ended with his team's victory, everyone dispersed, leaving you and kageyama, since you were walking in the same direction. "thanks for your hard work," you greeted him cheerfully, but he merely nodded, avoiding eye contact.

trying to engage him in conversation, you remarked on his performance, but kageyama's responses remained curt. "you were really cool as always, but you seemed even more fired up today after seeing tanaka-senpai’s spike," you commented lightly, trying to lighten the mood.

"you're so petty," you teased with a giggle, but kageyama stayed silent, lost in his thoughts.

as you walked and chatted animatedly about a recent volleyball match, a bicycle approached unnoticed.

just in time, kageyama noticed and instinctively pulled you closer, holding your hand to prevent you from getting hurt. flustered by his sudden action—and the fact that he was holding your hand—you looked at him in surprise.

"watch where you're going," kageyama said gruffly, his hands holding yours intensely. you awkwardly laughed off the situation, "i'm sorry. thanks though!"

glancing at your hands still together, you attempted to pull away. “you can let go now,” you try to smile.

there you go again, he thinks. he’s been experiencing this from you for days and it’s been pissing him off. he’s had enough.

kageyama held on to his grip on yours. "no," he said firmly and looked ahead. confused, "what? it’s fine, really, you don’t have to hold my hand,” you try to assure him and continued to let go of his hand.

his expression softened slightly as he slowly looked at you, revealing a hint of vulnerability beneath his usual tough exterior. "why, can't i hold your hand?" he questioned, his voice quieter but determined.

you were taken aback by his question. where is this coming from? you never really noticed anything unusual about his behavior—at least, not that you were aware of.

you try to stay calm for now. "what do you mean? of course you can, but there's no need to anymo—"

"that's a lie. you don't even let me touch you." he maintains eye contact with you. you can't quite grasp what he means yet, but despite the firmness in his voice, his eyes seem to be pleading, as if he's waiting for something.

"do i make you uncomfortable, y/n?" he asks while you're still processing the situation. you shake your head. "no, not at all."

"then why can't i hold your hand?" he continues. "you let the other members do it all the time, especially hinata. why do you treat me so differently?"

shit.

technically, you know why you were acting this way. you just never thought that this was something kageyama would even think or care about, so you just behaved this way naturally.

"i…" nothing else comes out. at this point, you and kageyama are having a staring contest. you want to go home—you’re nervous as hell—but he’s looking at you like he won’t leave until you answer him. "where is this coming from, kageyama?"

"hinata links arms with you, holds hands with you. sugawara-senpai pats your head all the time. tanaka-senpai has a habit of putting his arm around you whenever you compliment him—all of them get to touch you like that, and you don’t even care. but i just come and sit closer to you, and you back away already?"

honestly, you are amazed at how he remembers your interactions with the other members. to you, what they did was nothing to think about, but kageyama noticed every detail.

you knew kageyama—well, at least this trait of his; the fact that he is actually opening up about this means it has bothered him for quite some time. it dumbfounds you that these "small" things to you actually mattered to him—a lot, maybe even more than you realize.

you look down at the ground, breaking eye contact. "y/n—"

"you are right, kageyama, it is different."

"because i don't care if the others do it to me," you say, lifting your gaze back to him, a sense of vulnerability in your eyes this time. "but i care when you do."

you see the surprise on his face. "too much that it could kill me, honestly." he looks bewildered. "w-what? i don't understand."

"unlike the others, i…" your cheeks flush, and your eyes linger somewhere else again as you brace yourself for what you're about to say. "i want you to touch me."

this shocks kageyama, but leaves him wanting more answers.

"i want you to be close to me like that so badly, but it’s too much—it feels selfish. i mean, it’s not like you’re going to benefit much from that. it's all just for myself. i bet you don't want to do that, so i purposely avoided physical contact with you."

there was a few seconds of silence before he could even respond to that. "idiot," he whispers while keeping his head down, but loud enough for you to hear. you look at him, quite embarrassed that you just lowkey confessed to him, and now he's calling you an idiot. he takes a breath and closes his eyes. "why? i just answered you—"

"i want to!" he shouts, his voice rising sharply.

now, you both keep surprising each other.

"i'm not complaining here just because i think you treat me differently from them! hell, i couldn't care any less if it was anyone else. but it's you, y/n."

"i'm frustrated because i want to touch you like that too!"

he looks away, feeling shy. "i want to hold your hand and pat your head when i want to. i want to stand and sit close to you so i can feel you beside me. i want to be able to hug you when i score a point during a match," he pauses, "although i don't think you're allowed on the bench during a match—but that's not the point!"

he looks so cute, but this is also all new to you. you don't know how to feel about his confession. you don't know if this literally means he likes you (which you do too), but one thing is for sure.

you weren't being selfish after all.

"so, please, y/n…"

"let me. and don't avoid me," he says. "it hurts when you do, you know."

your eyes fill with concern. you take a few seconds before speaking again, "kageyama."

he looks at you shyly. "what?"

you respond by grabbing his hand, intertwining it with yours. "okay."

he looks down to see your hands together, and his face turns bright red. "you can hold my hand." he looks up to see your smiling face.

"i'm sorry for avoiding you like that. i thought you really didn't mind. and cared. thank you for telling me what you felt," you apologize.

he shakes his head. "no, you did nothing wrong. and i'm not actually mad, you know…"

"i was just frustrated. i'm sorry i kind of shouted just now."

you shake your head and start to walk again, letting your linked hands guide him as well. "no, no. i know. i'm even glad you let it all out. that's a big step, in my opinion, after knowing you these past months," you say.

he looks at you, his eyes widening slightly in surprise. it's as if he didn't expect you to notice. you didn't show any trace of anger or hurt after how he acted just now—you even cared about what he felt. his expression softens, a mix of amazement and shy delight flickering across his face and looks away again. "well, that's what i'm trying to learn these days."

"that's good," you give him what he thinks is the sweetest smile.

you both continue walking hand-in-hand towards the street corner where you usually part ways—kageyama takes the bus while you head in the other direction to the train station. after your intense and revealing conversation, the rest of the walk is quiet.

"y/n," he breaks the silence, and you look at him, urging him to say what he wants.

"uh, you know," he looks shy again, scratching the back of his head.

"what is it?" you ask.

"i'm just saying this to put it out there, but…" he squirms, "you can call me by my first name if you want to."

you are taken aback first by what he says. after absorbing his words, you laugh, and he continues to blush.

"all right, tobio."

[lunamochii]

you, me, our dreams.

cw ; thirdyear!hinata shoyo x f!reader, angst to fluff.

Dating Shoyo is like throwing yourself into a tornado, you never know what will be the next spin off of your relationship. During the last years of highschool, your relationship have gone still, his more preoccupied now on trying to make his dreams come true.

But what about finding from other people that his going abroad after finishing highschool?

"One more lap!"

The voice of your coach reach your ears even though you've gone underwater and when you finally finish your training, you got out from the pool and excuse yourself from the team. Changing back to your uniform, the note you got earlier from your locker, in which you put on the pocket of your skirt fell down

'Let's have a date! See ya afterschool, babe.'

You don't feel the usual tingling sensation, not even the butterflies in your stomach. You hurriedly put on your uniform and grab your bag, waving to your teammates you finally exited the pool area and run from there to your house. It's not that far but it really got you gasping for air once you arrive at your doorstep

A hot bath always relaxes your mind and body everytime you get home and you know that you need it now.

After taking a bath you just blow dried your hair and throw yourself at your bed, by the time you close your eyes you are once again reminded on what you've heard hours ago that you wish you'll just forget

"Oh the memories!"

You stop at your tracks when you heard some familiar voices, peeking out from where you are. You can see the faces of some of the alumni of Karasuno Voleyball Team

"I'm so excited to see Kageyama, Hinata, Tsukishima and Yamaguchi! Hope those four didn't stress Hitoka-chan."

"You're such a worry rat Asahi! I mean, same. I will teach Kageyama what to do with his sign once he get popular!"

The three men laugh and you can't help but admire how strong their bond is. You transferred to Karasuno during second year and that's where when the voleyball team are at the top. It also didn't help that you are at the same class of Shoyo and Kageyama, you three became friends and they always invites you over to watch some of their practice match

Although your relationship with Shoyo went from friends to lovers, his a ray of sunshine that you can't help but want to get close. It was valentines day when he surprise you with chocolates and flowers, remembering the teasing face of Tsukishima and Kageyama seeing how Shoyo almost fumble his surprise

"Though is Hinata really sure of his plans after graduation?"

It was Sawamura who spoke and it got you more curious so you went a little closer to hear more better

'Shoyo's plans after graduation?' He never told you about it

"I know. Brazil is so far away! Our lil'tangerine really grew up huh."

"Never saw it coming."

Their voices slowly fades away as you ponder your mind on what you just heard, why didn't Shoyo told you? Is that why his always busy and away? Just why?

You were brought back to your senses when your phone suddenly vibrated, you forgot that you set it to silent mode. You look at the caller and frown seeing that it's Shoyo

"Hi babe! I think you didn't see the letter I put on your locker, just trying to be romantic, heh. Anyways! I'm at the gate waiting for you."

Hearing his cheery voice makes your heart clench, not in a joyous way but the most saddest way.

"I'm sorry, I went home already."

"Eh? Then I'll go-"

"Not today, Hinata."

That's a warning the moment he heard you call him by his last name, you never call him that on a daily basis except when you're not in the mood

"Did something happen? Are you okay?"

You bit your lower lip before answering him, suppressing your emotions

"I'm fine. Bye."

The call ended and it was just the start of you slowly drifting away from Shoyo.

Morning came and you arrived at the classroom earlier than usual, you also exited the room before Shoyo can even go up and talk to you. You also manage to avoid him during lunch and recess by going with your friends. Last but not the least, you always go home earlier than usual.

2 weeks later

You were about to go home when a text from Hitoka arrive stating that she needs to tell you something, she said that you're the only class president left who hasn't know about it yet because she couldn't catch you.

Arriving at the gym, you notice that there's no people and that maybe Hitoka left since her text was sent 20 mins after you finish your training

"I'll just- *slam*"

You quickly turn around but to be only greeted by a hug, the familiar scent and warm immediately let your body be at rest. You didn't move nor pat him on the back, you only stood still and just look down even after he break away from the hug

"You're killing me, y'know that? 2 weeks without hearing your voice, feeling your warm embrace. I miss everything about you, ____."

His hand touches your face but you refuse to meet his gaze because you know that the moment you lift your face, all the strong facade you've put up will crumble

"I'm just busy. The swimming tournament is just around the corner so I've been practicing."

He knows that's a lie, Shoyo just knows. He learn from your teammates that the tournament got push back to next month and that you're pushing yourself to your limits everytime you train

"Why are you lying?"

That irk you

"I'm not lying."

"Yes, you are! The tournament is on next month and that you're just extra training trying to avoid me."

That did it, you push him away from you

"So what? Not like you care, Hinata. We're both athletes so you know how important our sports to us."

Still, you kept your head hang low. Fuck, your tears are already pooling on your eyes and you just hope that your voice won't waver for a second

"But you're important to me too! Look, I know I'm not the best boyfriend but I think about you all the time! Not being near you these past few days is torture, ____."

You scoff and Shoyo heard it loud and clear, something's wrong and it's telling him to reach out to you or else you'll really slip away from him

"Think about me? What a joke! Ever since we became third years, our relationship have gone astray. We only meet each other once a week or maybe none!"

His not understanding a word you're saying and his heart is beating so fast

"We are adults now, we can make big decision without trying to consult or tell others about it, right?"

"What are you saying?"

Shoyo lift his hand to reach out to you but

"Don't touch me!"

He got taken back at the sudden raise of your voice, he also notice how you kept fiddling with your hands

"What I'm trying to say is, let's just break up!"

"No. No, you can't just say that."

Shoyo immediately grab your shoulders but you kept on pushing him

"Let go of me, Hinata!"

"I can't do that. Please, what's gotten into you?"

"Nothing, just let me go!"

"Saying we break up is not nothing!"

Using all your strength you manage to push him hard and he landed on the floor, his eyes studied your actions and saw how you balled your fist and when he was about to speak up, tears drip down from your face to the floor

"I'm nothing to you! You don't think of me! Aren't you glad that I'm breaking up with you?! It will be more easier for you to just forget about me and go to Brazil, right?!"

"Where did you-"

"I'm doing you a favor so please just forget about me, think nothing of me!"

You gasp when he stood up and pulls you in for a tight hug

"Shoyo, please!"

"I'm not letting you go. Never."

"I hate you! I hate you!"

You cried on to his arm that you didn't notice your shoulder getting wet from his own tears, you two stood at the center of the gym, crying. When you calmed down and stop resisting, he pulled away enough to get a closer look of your face, he tilt your face up and capture your lips for a sweet and long kiss.

"I hate you.." you said in between kisses "I know.." and he replied but that didn't make Shoyo pull away. He broke the kiss when he felt your hands on his back, he looks at you but you averted his gaze.

Shoyo pulled you towards the stage and he lifts you up effortlessly and made you sit on the stage floor. He place his arms on each side of your body as he captures your lips for a kiss again. This time, your hands started to play on his orange locks, you feel like drowning each time he moves his lips. You hate how much grip he has on you, but what you hate the most is knowing you'll never be the same once you two part ways

"Open your mouth for me.."

"Mhm..!"

His now standing in between your thighs, one hand is place on your back while the other one is on the back of your neck. The deeper the kiss goes, the deeper you let yourself drown on to his love. When the both of you pulled away, a string of saliva appeared and you quickly cover your lips

"I planned to tell you that I'm going to Brazil the day I left the note on your locker. I guess you heard it from my teammates."

"No, not from your teammates. Didn't your seniors visited that day? I was passing by the gym when I heard them talk about it."

Shoyo hums and rest his head on the crook of your neck, his lips leaving soft feathering kiss there

"I love you, ____. I think about you all the time, every day and night. Even when I'm about to sleep, you're always on my mind. Not a day passes by where you're not included on my thoughts. I know that not telling you a little bit earlier of my plans is a bad move but it's because I'm also having trouble with it."

You softly stroke his hair and held hands with him, you miss being this close with him

"Trouble?"

"Mhm the thought of me leaving you all alone, the thought of me going somewhere where I'm away from the people I treasure, away from the person I love the most. It gives me so much pain, seeing your tears flow down from your cheeks while ago, it makes me want to back out from my own decision."

"No, I was being selfish. I want you to go after your dreams, I want you to shine more, Shoyo. I want the world to know just how good you are, I want to show the world what they're missing. Don't let my meaningless words and actions hold you back. Chase it, chase your dreams."

"But you're one of my dreams too. I want you to be at my side as I slowly reach the top. I want you near me. I want you to be there."

He cup your cheeks and kisses you lips which made you smile warmly and Shoyo couldn't help but fall even more harder

"And I will be there. I'm sorry for acting out of character. It was dumb of me."

"No, you're feelings are valid. If you were the one who did that to me, I'll have the same reaction."

You laugh softly and Shoyo kisses you once again, this time it's more full of his overflowing passion and desire for you.

"Stop pushing!"

"Fuck- I can't hear their voices."

"Guys we shouldn't be eavesdropping..."

"Tadashi is right guys!"

"The hell King! Move your ass!"

"What did you say Tsukishima?!"

"Stop it you two!"

You jolted away making you break away from the kiss and Shoyo let's out a annoyed sigh making you giggle and as soon the doors of the gym burst open and revealed Hitoka, Yamaguchi, Tsukishima and Kageyama.

"____, Hinata! Have you guys fix things up?"

Hitoka is the first one who spoke

"Just how long were you guys eavesdropping?" Shoyo ask

"When we heard ____ gasp for air." Kageyama answered

"What?!" You scream "Kageyama!" The setter look at his friends with annoyed expression, silently asking if what he said is wrong

"And that's why you can never have a girlfriend."

Tsukishima deadpans and that was the cue of them two bickering and you just can't help but shake your head. Shoyo squeezes your hand and you turn your head to look at him, he stole a quick kiss and press his forehead to yours

"I love you, ____."

"I love you too, Shoyo."

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