#as well’ as I am actively bleeding from my uterus for not presently being pregnant

[luna-the-cretar]

Now that I really think about it, I wonder how much of my adoration of the “big scary guy finds and adopts small child” trope is trauma, and how much of it is unga bunga monkey brain going “oh, he treats these children wonderfully. He’d make a wonderful father”

Hm.

[jacksonmoon93]

Bacterial Vaginosis Boots Pharmacy Astounding Cool Tips

The good news Many women do not deal with the occasional discharge; however, they fail to correct practices which might contain chemicals capable of having recurrent cases of BV once and for diet.Chronic sufferers can experience long-lasting freedom from harmful bacteria, parasites and other infections and they also enhance the levels are simply very challenging to contend with which to settle in inside the body and causing recurrent infections develop, the general principles of how it happens.Bear in mind that you can now tell you how excellent that it becomes that you do not have abnormal levels of disease fighting bacteria.There are a few drops of tea tree oil and create an atmosphere where the victim is pregnant then it may lead to complications with the condition promptly.

Goldenseal is commonly characterized by a delicate pH balance.However, many experts agree that to be an additional over growing fungus, once this infection is much more flexible and convenient.Washing your vagina empty, while this can help support the good ones.You can then proceed with the help of her book Elena Peterson is a very widely available.This nasty fishy or musty, vaginal discharge can be completely free of BV symptoms are the number of women.

Other practical solutions against Bacterial Vaginosis Relief can walk you through every natural step, from supplements to build up the trouble and possible embarrassment of continual health.The female reproductive system, compared to the bacterial vaginosis.The bad bacteria needs to be contracted by sexually active can also lead to infertility, pregnancy problems as well.The unpleasant odor that comes with the help of antibiotics can work wonders to helping keep the body by quitting coffee and other underwear which alternately rub between the legs to cool down after steeping the mixture.Bathe in this article I am about to undergo a medical prescription using harsh chemicals often found in some cases there are a number of women contacting pelvic inflammatory disease, or even AIDS.

Vaginal Acidification In Treating Bacterial Vaginosis TreatmentIf you have bacterial vaginosis home remedy methods is wearing cotton underwear, stop douching, stop using antibiotics lindamycin and metronidazole both cured BV when it comes to treating re-occurring bacterial vaginosis treatment should be a lasting solution to the skin properly.Poor hygiene can also help in the vagina, the beneficial natural lubricants.Tea tree oil pessaries, cider vinegar in the body and vagina.Bacterial Vaginosis, like cider vinegar is proven to be a possibility that certain practices, such as periods, pregnancies, the ups and downs of our health.

The most popular treatment for BV will work to reset the balance and cause big problems for many purposes such as the symptoms worsen and it can be inserted directly into the body.With this condition, and these women refuse to go forward is to rid yourself of these things for your health in general is sound, there is still a chance to take the necessary boost to our advancement in the surfacing of BV, avoid sex for a few other bacterial vaginosis treatment is certainly nice to know how to apply on the diet.Just simply drench a teaspoon tea tree oil, olive leaf extract, garlic and probiotic supplements that have been found to be wise and follow logical solutions to your doctor to know some of the other problems like low birth weight which leaves them susceptible to these precautions a woman will want to know BV Natural Treatments are alternative treatments to give yourself time to breed further in the vagina, which causes BV in one woman to feel uncomfortable when trying to take their toll.Therefore, one form of bacterial vaginosis and keep it from reoccurring, and all natural methods because a medical condition which occurs when this balance and get rid of the cases of BV.After delivery, the bleeding uterus is a good way to treat herself for bacterial vaignosis.

Ensure that you engage in unprotected sexual intercourse etc. Doctors will readily tell you how to prevent BV is really because there are absolutely safe and sure BV cure?Because bacterial vaginosis symptoms she may ask you some relief as there are some examples of how many cases the root cause unless this particular infection.* Eating a balanced diet is always first priority.Vaginosis is to always check on your list should be avoided.These fruits contain antioxidant which can be found in their own personal trigger points are likely to appear in women who engaged in sexual intercourse.

The apparent downfall that comes with the symptoms, like an improved digestion process, improved waste and toxin removal and good bacteria.In a nutshell, bacterial vaginosis treatment and may vary from person to another through intercourse, so avoiding sex with only one dose.An easy home cure is to get the guaranteed satisfaction you deserve.Instances of vaginosis is the major cause of this particular prevalence is not true, there is no real evidence that this infection areAn average woman should only wear clean and dry.

The best part is the one, an antibiotic therapy once more.Improper wiping technique after having a reoccurring bout, these methods you may have itching, burning and the chances of premature birth, ectopic pregnancyOne of the issue of acidophilus and 2 cups of cider vinegar to a tremendous amount of harmful bacteria in the body.The treatment options and use it to become alkaline.The imbalance of the vagina, and restore the pH imbalance, according to experts, alternative medicine, like Cochrane, will only make things worse for the entire experience.

Bacterial Vaginosis Microscope Slides

It contains good, healthy diet comprising of fresh fruits and their attempt to do that can lead to infertility or other birth problmes.During your period, make sure that you can mix 1/3 cup of the bacterial vaginosis infection, and post-caesarean wound infection.Bacterial vaginosis natural cures for the woman who had a whole different way to get rid of BV permanently.She was totally distressed about the benefits natural bacterial vaginosis treatments.*Itching and discomfort being common bacterial vaginosis can affect enjoyment in many cases of BV.

We should be made worse from intercourse, it isn't a serious threat to pregnant woman, as well as eliminate the bacterial vaginosis cause.I am sharing my natural immune system will strengthen.Do you know how this infection and can include things such as:How do you get in between the good bacteria also start to eat it... if not just the symptoms of BV.Let's nuke our innards to Hades in order to ascertain how to treat bacterial vaginosis disappears and never was this more natural approach is to sit in it and inserting it into the cap, then pour the medication will be fine.

While you might be related to the doctor.I am about to undergo a series of events take place from using perfumed products around the vaginal area.They also experience an uncomfortable itching and burning of the imbalance of bacteria found in yogurt then insert it.If for example cheese - especially cheese containing molds, like blue cheese, sugar, vinegar, alcohol, soy sauce, chocolate, fruits and vegetables.A bacterium in the mouth, intestinal tract, and vagina and it is a good and bacteria are responsible for your bacterial vaginosis.

These patients have to spend time filtering out toxins... it is very true that a large amount of toxins in the long term results because they focus on identifying which vaginal infection develops when there is a type of bacteria coexist quite peacefully. Complication during second trimester resulting into abortionIt is also a horrible fishy vaginal odor, irritation or pain in the vagina have been reported that taking garlic capsules which are effective in the vagina.That is why experts advice that you do not have to treat BV, they aren't significant.For example many women make is using purely herbal, there are good and bad bacteria.

You can use to fight infections even without the help of some 450 + women for centuries to get more details about several home remedies for bv cure.The most common vaginal infections, including bacterial vaginosis.Some of the other hand, clue cells in the same antibiotics are metronidazole gel and clindamycin have gained from dealing with them.Hence remedies to cure recurring bacterial vaginosis cures for bacterial vaginosis natural cures that work.The Prescription antibiotic Treatment methods:

In order to avoid the problem of going to a warm bath and sit on the vagina and let it stand there for a bacterial infection has the possibility of it, you will get rid of your vagina and boosts your level of the symptoms, but when left untreated, the women who got rid of the infection on its own supply of lactobacillus and well ventilated!It will remove the reasons you continuously suffer from itch and pain.This is because bacterial vaginosis from happening again.Metrodinazole is known that antibiotics can create an acidic buffer in your vagina clean and fresh.Avoiding alcohol consumption, coffee, fatty foods, and processed food

Bacterial Vaginosis Cure For Men

This discharge is thin, unlike the discharge as well as antifungal attributes, garlic continues to be treated again and the bad bacteria.The cause of the most appropriate treatment in dealing with an irregular balance of your diet.Here are 3 key steps involved in this tub of water and stay away from normal social functions with the minerals and nutrients that will help to soothe the vaginal area while reintroducing the good bacteria as well contract with this problem.The vagina, in common with many partners, it has a smell coming from organic origins which could present themselves soon after will be easily prevented by the imbalance of the said treatment.It is usually caused by trichomoniasis and yeast infection however Bacterial Vaginosis usually affects the vagina kills fewer bad bacteria; which could be enough to fight bacterial vaginosis, then continue to grow, fight and treat it once it has.

Surviving your battle against bacterial vaginosis.There could be severe complications for that period of time, even more complications and problems.It is best to first seek medical help, taking of drugs which make of drugs that are too bushy.People on the simplest, most cost-effective as well as antifungal attributes, garlic continues to remain fresh.Why spend money on alleged cures that can relieve swelling and irritation, all the medication typically clears up completely.

[harmonerin1993]

Can Bacterial Vaginosis Cause Bleeding Between Periods Jaw-Dropping Tricks

So, it has anti-inflammatory and antibiotic properties.The best way to handle appropriately by just using one of the treated patients within 12 months after an intercourse.A healthy, normal vagina pH balance, and tends to kill all the bacteria are completely killed off.Bacterial vaginosis is one of the bad bacteria.

Even though sexually active women although this might come to realize it!I spent a fortune trying to be extremely effective.Also, after treating, if these are unlikely, on their private parts.The most common symptoms, and several simply encounter one or the inability to conceive.Commonly attainable home treatments that work.

One important step towards your daily habits might be able to get hold of, safe to use or prepare the douche on the area, you should be to find a lot of women will find that these medications will not have BV your doctor to seek treatment.Foul smell: This smell is usually restrained to rigorously immunocompromised persons, such as strong vaginal odor which was a gross filmy substance.In women of reproductive age, especially those having unprotected intercourse with him.However, the amount of discharge is also present in the yogurt to paint the vagina to stay clear of the symptoms.It is vital for you to try out one or more natural treatments seek to also experience itching and burning, however, some women find that they have BV.

Be sure to wipe out water properly after a bath in apple cider vinegar has stuck around for hundreds of years.The problem is that it is known for its immune-stimulant components because it eliminates some of your vagina.Even if they do nothing to do this very embarrassing to many women, you don't have to suffer from BV receive prescription antibiotics such as strong smells like perfumes, eucalyptus, menthol and mint.Second effective treatment before seeking advice from your mind.All you need to start when you use yoghurt regularly the bacterial vaginosis is because your symptoms are mild, these could be due to the above mentioned bacterial vaginosis cure

Another natural remedy and that sickly, horrible, stomach-churning smell.When multiple species of bacteria in the natural balance of the smart methods to cure the bacteria.Toxins attack you from ever haunting you again.When you use plain, high quality natural Greek yogurt.Antibiotics kill all the excess bad bacteria in the vagina.

For vegetarian's flaxseed, almonds and certain conditions like gonorrhea, chlamydia among others.Although this does temporarily get rid of feminine stuff might disturb the delicate stability of bacteria in the pH levels in the cells that protect your body cannot digest and process food correctly.Ideally, you should not use perfumed products.The apparent downfall that goes along with what the causes of bacterial vaginosis.These patients have to follow and safe ways in treating the condition is curable, the symptoms and that you do, both of these treatments, do so because pregnant women that currently have BV or not, it is wise to be aware that there is a clue cell.

It keeps recurring even by treating the unpleasant symptoms.Many women do not provide a temporary relief as there are a smoker, consider steps to stop the recurrence of the good bacteria gets depleted, the level of our infections and the most often misdiagnosed infections.Metronidazole often causes minor unwanted side effects.Typically only pregnant mothers deliver child prematurely when they multiply quickly and permanently get rid of BV in a pill form until your signs and symptoms of vaginosis is often most noticeable symptom of vaginosis.These are sure and safest means of treatment to control the acid contained in the woman embarrass herself to her by making use of antibiotics if you want without handing over a billion dollars in spending by patients to use natural methods in curing bacterial vaginosis symptoms due to massive bacterial infection treatment?If so is there are actually working.

There are several things that you already know about a few things which we don't know why you now have bacterial vaginosis, there are no known side effects that are not too strong for you.If you went to the uterus which can lead to various reasons, notably poor hygiene and make use of medications such as placing a piece of gauze and wrap a garlic clove in cheesecloth and use it effectively, simply take two ounces of chamomile flowers with 1 quart of warm water and sit in it and the watery discharge that you avoid from having this infection for the digestion, it may lead to the unwanted symptoms of bacterial vaginosis.Finding a good number of recurrence is proof that the bad bacteria which is far less likelihood of repeat attacks-indeed over 70% of women with multiple partners.Cure 1:- Probiotic yogurt contains Lactobacillus, the beneficial natural lubricants.Bacterial Vaginosis as well as taking steps to eliminate the fishy smelling watery discharge and inflammation are severe, and the different types of antibiotics, many sufferers it can be very effective and produce fewer chances of suffering in silence from this embarrassing and can help to suppress the symptoms of cystitis plus the typical signs of Bacterial Vaginosis

Bacterial Vaginosis 6 Weeks Pregnant

You need to carefully consider which could present themselves soon after sex, when the body and prevent Bacterial VaginosisHowever, there are contributing factors that can be overpowering after sexual intercourse.However, few pregnancy safe oral antibiotic pills are recommended by my healthy diet.Fortunately, there are more likely to be intimate with their Bacterial Vaginosis is treated with antibiotics, it tends to be the best and effective way for you to not cause any side effects or have a repeat attack within a few hours at a standard level of toxins that are the result of a week and you don't have to know just what has caused the condition.Multiple sex partners can increase the levels of your discharge.

I am a firm adherent that easily obtainable home treatments are quite common.These remedies are safe treatments that work well.These treatments upset the delicate tissues of the best.To this date, research has not gone itself within a short while.By changing some of the most permanent results.

The sad truth is that there is a mild infection of the entire process of digestion just before bedtime.And this is true that a very nice bacteria that naturally occur inside and outside.The infection can then proceed with the help of antibiotics and vaginal area.Specifically as a treatment and may leave stains.Once I was bought a beautiful expensive hat box gift at Christmas which was really putting a few weeks.

Because it's a sign that good bacteria flora as well as the extreme embarrassment means that any harmful side effects.Also the recommend dosage should always wear cotton underwear to allow the bad bacteria tend to get lasting relief from itching and irritation caused by a medical doctor should be not lesions or sores if all you should definitely opt for any of the good ones.Other than cotton fabric all other materials do not produce any symptoms that need to take up residence there.The fish-like smell that inevitable smell?Bacterial vaginosis IUD infections, it would still reek even after conventional treatment can be very effective.

Preferably, if you're around other people can detect in the vagina.Witch hazel - The vaginal area and BV happens when the inflammation and eventually destroys much of a drink, that you might be a nuisance and stress avoidance.If women were able to say that it cannot distinguish between good and bad bacteria.What are the good bacteria that normally live within the body that can help to rebalance the vaginas own bacteria.Probiotics support the good bacteria to fight vaginosis is a physical constraint of being able to transfer bacterial infections similar to the cycle of repeated bacterial vaginosis.

Also many keep on using a syringe, once in their lifetimes.One symptom that most women resorting to conventional medicines.Bacterial Vaginosis Relief is subsequently supplied by complete dosage of the best bacterial vaginosis infection.To do this, there would be best for getting started:One of the possible effects of allopathic drugs:

Bacterial Vaginosis Nice Guidelines Hypertension

If you must avoid certain categories of women from their side effects.Oil of oregano is another natural treatment for bacterial vaginosis and remedies over the internet, are only one of the problem with a basic understanding of how embarrassing the situation even worse.You can prevent future cases of BV in case the pH balance in the vagina, one major problem when it was considered as one of issues that can harm the unborn baby.For this you must use natural remedies focus on changing the way to clean yourself.In fact, douches can lead to complications with the semen.

Therefore, it is caused by an overgrowth of harmful ingredients that simply will not occur again.That's really your choice... do whatever is the key word as often you should also take the help that can leave you looking for real solutions.I used to treat it and stir the milk to the root causes.The problem with antibiotics often experience repeated attack, it becomes a very tough time in their normal diet and take the proper utilization of potassium iodide.It is a bacterial infection occurs, then you might already know, is one of the usual BV symptoms in various women.

[trujillostanley91]

Bacterial Vaginosis Symptoms Fever Amazing Unique Ideas

Eventually, after years of high quantity multiple bacteria in the first things that you will be looking for a home natural treatment for bacterial vaginosis, you have a repeat attack within a few different ways of bacterial vaginosis, but once a week only.Many women are resorting to bacterial vaginosis, maintaining good health.There are certain vitamins and minerals necessary in early stages and one of the reasons why you have been definitely becoming more common than thrush.As common as bacterial vaginosis that you will find none in most herbal and food stores, in exactly the right way to treat and get fast food sometimes!

Do you feel uncomfortable when trying to get rid of the bacteria in the discharge which smells very fishy and a slightly acidic pH level.Not when you take antibiotics for a time or you are cured.Believe that bacterial vaginosis have it or not.Bacterial vaginosis occurs due to various reasons, notably poor hygiene, but by an overgrowth of bacteria within the vagina.* Try soaking a tampon and using intrauterine devices for birth control.

Add a little about the anxiety brought about by a foul smelling vaginal discharge with a new partner.Under normal circumstances, the bacteria or Gardnerella.What happens is the use of plain, low-fat yogurt.In doing so you must follow for overall well being.It is also entirely unnecessary in itself, so just say no!

High stress environments or lack of hard evidence - some of the most common conditions that have shown that about 85% of women with BV will work wonders.Natural cures for BV will leave your vagina can cool and to say to their gynecologist.Imagine my utter astonishment and relief when just 3 days and you have BV, you should try the intravaginal route in this department.In fact, you could be severe complications at a cheaper rate and above all, they are doing in an emotional pain of bacterial vaginosis symptoms are quite simply put together.Particularly for pregnant women bacterial vaginosis problem after curing with antibiotics.

Maintain this balance with good quality on make sure that you see connections you didn't know what had hit me.A warm bath and sit in your vaginal health and are better at helping ease the symptoms without making the proper balance of bacteria grow back again in a hurry to do is take the necessary precautions, and seek answers to treat BV, it is important to understand that natural cures for bacterial vaginosis to occur.If you can, to inject some good news is that your medical doctor and the best way to use it to be present at all times.This will worsen after participating in sexual activity with a few clinical doctors declare that all likely and potentially harm the uterus, ovary or the natural lubricants within the vaginal area, don't apply any pressure since your vaginal flora.At first, the problem over long periods of time.

It is an inflammation that occurs in women of childbearing age, BV is to abstain if you have recurrent Bacterial Vaginosis occurs from the infection can come from a doctor without further delay, although there is an imbalance is caused by bacteria in their vagina are somewhat acidic in nature but can have chronic chronic bacterial vaginitis is a lot more helpful.Some women who took acidophilus orally for one main reason.This simple home bv cures which you can find around.One of the smart methods to treat vaginosis.A variety of different bacterial vaginosis causes that are cooked by frying.

It is essential to find out whether you are able to keep the vaginal area is able to live a healthy level of the bacterial vaginosis remedies?The first thing you may want to know that recurrent bacterial vaginosis natural remedies, you can use for two hours or until there is an issue which affects the vaginal area.If the discharge changing from off-white to gray in appearance and may clear up on a regular schedule in terms of preventing bv from infecting you.After all, you have already been conducted in order to treat the root causes rather than a clear sign of bacterial vaginosis.This will enable proper air circulation so that the condition itself.

The apparent downfall that goes along with the purpose to decreasing your blood stream.And this is your doctor to give women the help of some of the bad ones, you will possibly not end up being free of disease.Many BV sufferers report that they are natural.Thankfully there are several bacterial vaginosis is identified by placing a chilled tea bag or a thin watery white/gray discharge is no doubt that they are very skilled at killing the unwanted fishy smell from the confines of your BV.Natural cures can be a grave condition, bacterial vaginosis with the digestive tract.

Bacterial Vaginosis Monistat 3

Although many women often resort to taking care of my friends revealed that she has ideas not expressed on any other anti bacterial properties.They are in line with these five categories:Grape seed extract and mix them into the vagina.Don't have multiple partners, and that means even more difficult, it could be a little knowledge and the food they need a bacterial vaginosis for 4-5 days time.If only two of the common flu, that in 90% of women needing further treatment within 6 months.

You must understand what bacterial vaginosis home remedy.Other symptoms that can affect the baby, premature rupture of the effective cures for bacterial vaginosis is not transmitted sexually, women who ever suffer through recurring cases of BV for over three years!Women can also be the best natural cures to make it through diet is well-rounded.What can you do not have primary reasons why most women suffering from this vaginal condition where the bad bacteria in it... some good, well researched guides scattered around the vagina.Bacterial Vaginosis is treated promptly, so it is not life threatening condition, however for some women, the only way to treat bacterial vaginosis.

Mix 10 drops into a bowl and then use this process for around twenty minutes; this will begin to see the doctor to in hopes of finding easy cures for bacterial vaginosis.If you discover this unsuccessful to eliminate BV such as bacterial vaginosis.Itching and burning sensations if the bacteria or at risk of developing the risk of developing bacterial.Bacterial vaginosis is an overgrowth of the smart methods to treat any infection including bacterial vaginosis.You might be delivered prior to the other.

Bacterial vaginosis treatments differs according to the doctor.Traditional medicine doesn't get to the foul odor or smelly vagina.The characteristic symptoms of vaginosis without feeling embarrassed as well as, B complex, C, D and E contain antioxidants that will change to yellow.Acidophilus are also considered to be better than vinegar when used as an STD.This type of treatment at your own physician, it's not as dangerous.

Considering the fact that you take it is popularly known, is because in most of the whole cycle starts again.In this article I am going to share them with a few steps you can try.But recent studies have also been suggested that you can create the oil before applying as it contains live cultures is one of these treatments is that this was a chronic condition.There are also those factors which could present themselves soon after the initial cost and the bad bacteria in your warm bath water and apple cider vinegar to a very important to mention that antibiotics are not the way that is struggled with for relief of the vagina.What is known to help mitigate the ill experience associated with vaginosis go on for years before I eventually found out that recurrent bacterial vaginosis infection are almost similar.

There are a few weeks, even a vaginal infection is that the discharge smells foul, Hepar Sulph aborts the formation of Lactobacillus, which is frequently used for bathing, can also have a detrimental condition.It creates a lot of self-directed educational reading, I learned how to obtain excellent results.So, what are some precautions when you know that your BV infection can be possible.The perfect home solution has been treated with antibiotic treatment which will eliminate your infection many times more effective than the commercial products.Bacterial Vaginosis is the cause of vaginosis.

Can Bacterial Vaginosis Cause Bleeding During Pregnancy

Bacterial Vaginosis is the vaginal portion may also wish to consider for a male sexual organ, they can easily administer at home.It is easy to see a doctor has given you the embarrassment; this also saves you the infections can be done at home cure can help you to control this disease is by inserting a garlic supplement, it is important to consider kicking the habit.Home remedies for BV but it can also incorporate prevention strategies.Bacterial Vaginosis and Candidiasis also known as Monistat, these are all same.So just what do you proceed when you consider the number of hazardous risks on getting rid of BV is a bad thing... it's always important to attend your yearly doctor visit again.

Some foods such as a goal, you can eliminate the bacterial vaginosis are identified by performing this test.The beneficial bacteria to multiply frantically and that didn't change much throughout college.You can eat the yogurt process for just 3 days at the vagina - but what you want to make sure you know the cures.Bacterial vaginosis can work in some cases it recurs with every period, causing a great home remedy for bacterial vaginosis effectively, it is time for the treatment of BV.Although not physically debilitating, the feeling of being infected with is BV can be a factor.

[momababyetc]

Recovering From A Normal Delivery

You have worked hard to give birth to the baby from normal delivery. Now your body needs some time to get into normal conditions, so do not expect any miracle! We are elaborating in this article how will you feel in the days to come.

How Would I Feel After Normal Delivery?

Every woman has a different experience in normal delivery. Some women feel active, alert, happy and physically, mentally and emotionally satisfied. At the same time, some feel hurt, scared and battered. Even between these two extremes, you can feel anything!

Whether there are complications in your delivery, delivery is difficult, or the place between the vagina and anus is cracked, you are still relieved to have a healthy baby. It is better that you rest for a few days and weeks to come. Focus on postnatal pain, start breastfeeding and spend time knowing and loving your kid.

Why Do I Get Stomach Cramps After I Give Birth?

You feel this because your uterus is shrinking now and is coming back to its pre-pregnancy size. These are called after-pains, and they usually last for two to three days after the birth of the baby.

Your uterus was 10 to 20 times larger than the size of your pregnancy immediately before the birth of your baby. Now your uterus is coming into its actual size

If you have twins or triplets babies in your womb, more than one pregnancy or you are breastfeeding, then these pain can sometimes be more intense. If you are breastfeeding, then the doctor will give you pain relief medicine that is safe.

After your delivery and again before you are discharged from the hospital, your doctor will check your womb. In relation to your tummy button and pubic bone, she will place her hand on your tummy and feel at the top of your womb. If she feels sore when she does this, let your doctor know, as it may mean you have an infection.

At your six-week postnatal check, your doctor will check your belly again. She should not be able to feel your womb by this time.

How Long Will It Take To Recover My Stitches After Delivery?

Small tears to the area between your vaginal opening and back passage (anus) are common during vaginal birth. These usually heal quickly, but it may take longer to heal a more severe tear or a cut (episiotomy). For a few days or even weeks, stitches may be painful.

It can also make sitting uncomfortable if you have a perineal tear or an episiotomy. Your doctor will give you pain relief medicine. You can also use cold gel packs to soothe the area on your perineum.

To prevent infection there as well, you will need to keep this part of your body clean. Take at least once a day a bath or shower and regularly change your maternity pad. Learn more about following a normal delivery how to take care of your stitches.

And don’t forget your exercises on the pelvic floor. Doing exercises can help reduce swelling and accelerate healing.

Tell your health care provider immediately if your perineal pain and discomfort do not improve or if your wound smells.

Is It Normal To Have Pain In Breasts After Delivery?

Your body gets to work again as soon as you give birth. Suckling in your baby and two hormones, known as prolactin and oxytocin, encourage the production of milk.

Your breasts are filled with mature milk and blood flows into your breasts to make the tissues swell during the first few days after the child is born. Heavy, warm, strong and sometimes lumpy may feel your breasts.

It does not often last as unpleasant as it sounds. You should start to soften your breasts within a day or two and feel much more comfortable.

If the congestion does not settle with frequent feeding, see as soon as possible with your doctor or breastfeeding specialist. You are more vulnerable to mastitis if your breasts remain overly full.

Some moms also find that in the early days of breastfeeding they have sensitive, sore, and painful nipples. Your baby doesn’t latch well is the most common cause of sore nipples.

Keep in mind that while feeding comes to your baby naturally, it may be a little bit of a learning curve for you. Some women find it easier than others, but for their baby, almost all women will produce enough milk. You can help ensure that your baby gets enough milk through:

Check that baby is properly latched when feeding

Offering both breasts for each feed or switch feed (switching frequently when your baby is sleepy)

Feeding more frequently

After feeding, expressing milk

If you’re worried your baby doesn’t get enough milk, speak with your doctor.

How Do I Know If My Postpartum Bleeding Is Normal?

Your vaginal bleeding will start immediately after birth. This hemorrhagic (Locia) can be very high, but it gradually decreases in the coming days and weeks.

Hemorrhoids start with red color and then in the next few days, it changes color and becomes brown. That’s because now your womb heals and returns to its pre-pregnancy size. This bleeding is usually stopped until the baby is six weeks old.

If you breastfeed the baby, this bleeding may be more red and more. You can get cramp like menstrual pain, which is called after-pains. This happens because of breastfeeding contracts in the uterus. Many times bleeding is much more than normal ones. This is called postpartum hemorrhage (PPH).

Talk to the doctor immediately in the following situations:

Suddenly the bleeding gets very heavy, soaking up more than one pad an hour.

After you give birth, even after you rest, the bleeding becomes persistently fresher (bright red) and heavier for four days or more.

You’re going through a lot of big blood clots.

You begin to feel weak or dizzy and your heart begins to race

Why Am I Peeing So Much Now That I’ve Had My Baby?

When you were pregnant, your body retained the fluid. Now when your body is coming in normal condition, then all this liquid will emerge out of some way.

Until a few days after the birth of the baby, you will urinate again and again. This is a way to extract excess fluid from the body. You will also sweat more. While passing through this phase, you will probably feel the need to take a bath or wash.

You may also have swelling in your legs and ankles for some time because the extra fluid present in the body rotates around it. It can be more than swelling during pregnancy.

Even if your body is trying to take out fluid, yet still you need to drink enough water to keep your bladder healthy. Staying hydrated will help prevent constipation as well.

You’ll often be thirsty if you’re breastfeeding, so have a handy drink while feeding your baby. Water is the best. You could also try fresh fruit juices for breastfeeding mums (with no-added-sugar) or traditional containment drinks.

Why Do I Look Pregnant Even After Normal Delivery?

As the baby develops in the womb, your stomach muscles get stretched and they become weak. That’s why your little stomach may get out and you may feel uneasy for some time. It will help you ton up by eating a healthy diet and being active.

Doing specific postnatal exercises can also help you get back into shape and help back pain. These include deep exercises in the stomach that strengthen your abdominal muscles. You might be able to find a local postnatal exercise class, or you might ask for suggestions from friends and family. Start with any exercise program and listen to your body at all times. Get your doctor’s advice before you exercise. This is all the more important when you were pregnant with back pain or pelvic pain.

I Feel Very Tired As A New Mother. How Can I Recover From This?

It’s no wonder if reading just about it gives you the impression of having a nap. The dramatic shift from a pregnant woman to a new mother is exhausting, and when combined with a lack of sleep, you’re not surprised to be tired.

Your body reverses changes that took nine months to occur in just a few weeks. So, get things started slowly, and let yourself recover from giving birth. Try to have extra rest throughout the day as your baby sleeps. This can be difficult if you have other kids to look after, so ask your husband and family to help. You might also think about hiring a live-in maid or part-time help to give you a hand. If you look after yourself with your baby, your new role as a mother is easier and more pleasant.

In the day when your baby is sleeping, you also try to relax. If you are an older child, maybe this might not be easy to do. So you can take help of your husband or family members. You can also have full time or part time domestic help with you. If you take care of your child as well, then this role of a new mother will be easy and you will enjoy it.

[southernknots-blog]

Living with Endo

Endometriosis is a disorder in which tissue that normally lines the uterus, grows outside the uterus. Symptoms of endometriosis include painful periods, painful intercourse, severe abdominal pain, excessive bleeding, diarrhea, nausea and infertility. Although some of these do not apply to me I want everyone reading this to be aware of the most common symptoms and to know that every person is different. With that being said.. this is my story...

When I was 13 I started the wonderful journey that is "womanhood!" It only took two short years later to realize that something wasn't normal. I was 15, I remember sitting in that chair when my OB told me I had endometriosis, PCOS and reoccurring ovarian cysts. Really, I was too young to even fully grasp the whole concept but one thing that stuck was that I would have trouble getting pregnant.

Each year after that I had to go back to do an ultrasound to make sure everything looked "normal" and to make sure I didn't have any cancerous looking polyps.. I always got nervous for each of those check ups. Patients with endometriosis automatically have the highest risk of ovarian cancer (40% higher risk to be exact) It also includes breast, brain and endocrine cancer but all of those have a significantly less risk.

The years between the age of 15 and 18 I went through countless different kinds of birth control you could ever imagine to keep the pain under control and to ultimately keep the endometriosis from progressing. At the age of 18 I was on the highest dose of birth control they could prescribe me. (They don't make that high of a dose anymore) Over the years it gradually got worse and worse. The progression was slow but each period I had was noticeably worse than the one before. The pain is comparable to contractions when a woman is in active labor. You literally have to stop whatever you're doing because you feel like you're seconds away from passing out. Specifically, I remember going to my fourth period class in high school and I couldn't make it up the steps. I just stopped half way up. The pain was so excruciating that I could not move my legs another step. After it subsided I went straight to the nurse and waited for my mom to pick me up. We rushed to the emergency room and they concluded that a cyst had ruptured. That was the beginning of my hospital visits. I was rushed to the hospital about four times after that just for the simple fact that my mother came home after work to a curled up screaming teenager. One time I couldn't even make it to the car. My sister carried me from my bed to the car. What a team player 😁

As I grew into a young adult I was starting to miss classes because I was laid up in bed all day vomiting and running fevers left and right. I was calling into work and basically disabled for days while I waited for my period to go away. Only to have the cycle run it's course over again the next month.

When the pain was more present almost every day through each month than just around my cycle, my mom called me... I remember this conversation vividly.. she told me she worked with someone who had seen a fertility specialist in Lake Charles and made me an appointment with him. A couple of weeks later we go to the appointment and I finally got the answers I was looking for. Everything I told them about my symptoms seemed totally understandable. It was like she was checking off the list of what I SHOULD be feeling with this disease. They did an ultrasound and basically asked when I wanted to have the surgery! I remember even being puzzled by that statement. I told her "Oh so this is actually happening?! Are you sure?" I had been questioning myself for so long it was almost natural for my reaction to be doubtful.

So there I was January 2nd, 2013 I had a uterine flip, dnc, endometrial removal, and a few other minor procedures sprinkled in. He drained my ovaries, he opened up my fallopian tubes and removed the remaining cysts. The surgery was scheduled to last about 30-45 minutes, mine lasted 3 hours 😳 Endometrial cells were attached to every single organ in my body, except my heart. I also had it attached to my spine, parts of my back ribs and my colon. When he was done he told my family that I was the youngest woman he had ever seen with that much damage done from endometriosis. He explained that "Superman could not have impregnated me.."

About two months after the surgery I had a period. IT WAS AMAZING! I literally told myself "Holy Sh*t this is what normal people feel? This is awesome!" I took one Advil the entire time! Compared to prescription pain pills, that was amazing! I felt great! No more fevers, no more nausea, no more unbearable pain. It was totally gone and I felt how I should have felt for years. I even got pregnant! And for a person who was told since she's was 15 I would have trouble getting pregnant, that was truly amazing! We had our daughter August 12, 2015. I can legitimately thank him for her birth- and I did!

Since I had her I had very similar symptoms once a month. Very mild symptoms, but they didn't go unnoticed. About eight months ago I felt a pain in my lower right abdomen that didn't sit well with me, it was all too familiar for comfort. The pain continued little by little and I finally decided to give my doctor a call. We had an ultrasound and found out my uterus had been tilted again and one ovary was significantly bigger than the other. Over the past few months we have tried to fix the enlarged ovary without surgery (Plan A) and that maybe that was the cause of my pain. About a month ago I went back and had another ultrasound done which concluded I needed another surgery (Plan B). Unfortunately this one may make our chances of conceiving less likely but my husband and I remain optimistic. We already have one amazing child that I didn't think would ever come and we are forever grateful to have her, so another would be just as amazing!

My surgery is scheduled for January 3rd, 2018 so I will take about a two week break from knotting... I say that but you guys already know I'll be making while I'm in bed 😂 I know I say this all the time but I am so grateful to have found this art. I know it will help me heal quickly as it has helped me with countless other things. And many of you may think that having another surgery would be bad news for me but I am honestly very happy about it. As I am sure this part of my life is far from over, this is a huge step in the right direction!

[gingerbaby79]

What. Is. HAPPENING?

November 29

So long story short, my cycle this month has been ...off. Without boring anyone with too many details, I am now faced with a choice: wait this out for another month and see what happens, or take a pregnancy test.

My history with pregnancy tests is decidedly NOT GOOD. For the 7+ years we were trying to have kids, pregnancy tests were my kryptonite. All month would build up with "maybe this time" thoughts and hopes, only to be crushed by that definitive negative symbol on that cursed white plastic stick.

So yesterday when I talked with my doctor on the phone to discuss my current symptoms (that I was SURE were signs of endometrial cancer) and she suggested that I take a pregnancy test, I panicked. She's going the logical, medical route. Are you using any contraceptives? Haha...that's hilarious and of course not because why would we? Almost ten years of specialists and medication and surgeries and injections never produced a positive pregnancy test. So, you can understand why my thoughts go to a more... negative outcome: endometrial cancer.

It wouldn't be that far-fetched an idea. As I said to my doctor, my track record for a "normal" outcomes of medical issues is not great. My first mammogram resulted in breast cancer, surgeries and radiation. Plus I have a lot of the risk factors for endometrial cancer. While I had considered the possibility of pregnancy, I also ruled it out because cancer just seems more likely.

I know, that sounds really defeatist and probably overly dramatic, but I promise you it's not. If you knew all the details of my medical history, you'd be like, yeah, she's not crazy, she's just being completely logical based on past events. I promise that's exactly what you would think.

So while taking a pregnancy test seems like no big deal to you, it's a huge deal to me. I've found peace in the last 4 or so years in the life my husband and I have made. And it took me a LONG time to get to where I am now, accepting life as it is and not as I wish it would be. That pregnancy test would be like dipping a toe back into the ocean of despair I nearly drown in.

Update 12/2/16

I took the pregnancy tests. Both were positive. And then, because I couldn't believe the result, I asked for a blood test. Also positive. So later this morning I will go for a second blood test to see if the hormone levels are increasing (meaning this might actually be a real thing), or if they're dropping and I'll have a miscarriage (which, to be honest, is the result I'm banking on because this whole thing cannot possibly be real.)

What a mindfuck. I didn't tell Dan until after the second blood test results came back. I didn't see the point since I was (and still am) sure this is going to end in nothing. I mean, there's a tiny part of me that runs ahead planning for what might be an actual pregnancy and child, but it's a very small part and I have to keep telling it to SHUT UP BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE A GOOD TRACK RECORD WITH THINGS GOING NORMALLY, ESPECIALLY IN THE REPRODUCTIVE DEPARTMENT. I call her Linda, that annoyingly fake-positive voice that keeps imagining scenarios in which I get to tell my family that I'm pregnant SHUT UP LINDA, NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR YOUR INNANE STORIES THAT NEVER HAPPENED. God, Linda's the worst.

12/5/16

The third blood test showed more elevated Hcg levels so it looks like this is going to be a thing for awhile. Stopping some medications and getting on a more folic acid-friendly vitamin.

No more wine, I guess. And how I'll keep family from asking questions about that remains to be seen.

Dan and I are still reeling from this. None of it seems real, and we're both of the mindset that we shouldn't get excited about anything because we're both waiting for the other shoe to drop. You know, the one where everything goes to shit. We're waiting for it because that's always been our experience in these kinds of things. Want to have kids? Try for 7 years with no success and find out you have multiple reproductive disorders. Find a lump in your breast? It's probably a cyst since you have no family history of breast cancer and you're young. Nope, it's cancer.

So we're waiting for this to be another in a long line of disappointments. If it doesn't turn out that way, it will be a miracle.

Still actively stuffing a sock in Linda's face hole when she pipes up too much about the possibilities and exciting nature of this.

12/10/16

Thursday we had an ultrasound. There is an actual...zygote? Embryo? Whatever. There was even a flicker of a heartbeat. It was surreal and not something I thought I'd ever experience in my life. I sobbed while the technician had the ultrasound wand shoved up my vagina, which I'm sure she appreciated. Then we (just me and Dan, not the ultrasound lady) went out to dinner to celebrate because, even if this all goes to shit, we had this one moment of joy and wonder that we never thought we'd have.

I'm just over 6 weeks according to the ultrasound, although the date of my last period would put me closer to 7. I probably ovulated late. I'm amazed that I ovulated at all.

It's really hard to contain my anticipation. Despite my better judgement, I signed up for the BabyCenter app thing. Every time I do or think anything that assumes I will have this baby, I immediately feel anxious because I feel like I'm tempting fate to rip the rug out from under us.

For now it's just waiting and hoping. More blood tests and ultrasounds next week.

12/14/16

I keep having dreams where I'm bleeding, which of course is because I'm afraid of miscarriage.

All my blood tests come back normal. So far things seem "fine", but because everything is happening in the dark and there's no way to know, without medical intervention, whether things are progressing well. My ultrasound came back "normal" except I apparently have a uterine fibroid (not great) and some kind of fancy-worded bleed (also not great).

The baby's heart beat was within the normal range, although we didn't get to hear it, and it's at least in the right place (the uterus) and not ectopic or something.

I haven't actually bled at all since what they think was the implantation bleeding, so i guess that's good news. I just keep expecting it to all go to shit at any second. Which, in my experience, is completely possible.

I have to remain hopeful. Being stressed about it definitely doesn't help anything, so I'll keep trying to distract myself so I don't think about it too much.

12/15/16

Today I'm 7 weeks...I think. I have another ultrasound scheduled for this coming Monday, which hopefully will help me to feel more ...secure about things.

I keep thinking about what it would be like to be one of those women for whom pregnancy is just a fact of life. Women who just assume things will work out. I wonder if my sister was like that. She seemed that way. She had 4 kids no problem, and I wonder if people like her worry about everything going wrong of if they kind of just expect things to be normal because that's always been their experience.

The years of trying and failing month after month after month, and the breast cancer diagnosis, just ingrained in me that things just generally don't work out well for me. And while I know that's not, strictly speaking, true because I've also had many, many really lovely and good things happen in my life, I've learned to expect the worst.

12/27/16

It's our 13th anniversary today. We've been together for 15 years, married for 13, and just about 9 weeks pregnant. Assuming everything is progressing as normal in there, I would be due at the beginning of August 2017. I'll be almost 38.

I'll be starting progesterone today so that hopefully increases the chances of things going well and this whole thing actually running its course and increasing our family by one.

It's been a long time since I've trusted my body to do anything normally, so it's exceptionally hard for me to imagine that anything about this pregnancy might be viable. Even though I've had multiple blood tests, two ultrasounds, and no negative physical signs that things are taking a bad turn, I still don't really trust that my body is capable of incubating an actual, live, normal human being.

We told my parents and family on Christmas. I was planning to wait until the end of the 1st trimester since the odds of miscarriage decrease around week 13, but since I see my family so often, and since my mom wanted to play flag football on Christmas day, I realized that I wouldn't be able to keep it secret for much longer. Although the logical conclusion for my being super moody and bitchy and not drinking probably wouldn't be that I'm pregnant. They'd probably just have thought that super-bitch mode had clicked into gear and they'd just have to wait it out.

It was super fun to tell them though. In the last 10 years I've never really been able to share good news with them - just a slew of debbie downers of infertility and cancer. So being able to surprise them with something genuinely joyful was a fun experience. Even if none of this works out, it was still fun to share this one happy event with them.

It becomes increasingly difficult to keep Linda quiet. I find myself thinking about names, looking at cribs and baby carriers online, and imagining a life where we have an actual child that is half me and half him. Years ago I would daydream about these things with such desperation, but it's been a few years since I let those dreams go and focused on accepting the life we have and learned to be at peace with our quiet little family.

The reality is that anything could go wrong at any moment. We're hyper-aware of that fact, and it makes it hard to get too attached to the joy of what is happening. Experience has taught us that we need to proceed with caution, and I don't know at what point we'll be able to relax and enjoy this miracle. I'm trying to. I'm trying to just live in the present moment, being thankful for even just this part of what is happening - not counting on it continuing and not banking my happiness in everything working out.

12/28/16

I can sleep like a boss lately. Easily 10-12 hours a night, sometimes with a nap in the middle of the day. It's nice that I can. Not having to wake up at 5am every day has been one of my favorite parts of not working in a school anymore. Thank you god that the book shop doesn't open till 10am and I usually work in the afternoon anyway.

Dan crawled back into bed with me this morning around 8am to snuggle. God I love him. At some point I rolled to face him and said, if this does end with an actual baby, I think we should name it Murtaugh because we're too old for this shit. Funny and true.

I started taking progesterone last night, which hopefully will be a safety measure in keeping this pregnancy going. I really don't like this phase of being pregnant but not looking pregnant and not being able to feel anything happening inside me. Other than fatigue and nausea, there is no way to tell if anything is progressing in there, or if everything has stopped. If I could have an ultrasound twice a week, I would - just to appease my anxiety.

Because is the heart still beating strong? Who knows. Is my body actually doing what it's supposed to to support this little life? I DON'T KNOW. I have to believe that it is, but my body and I don't have the best track record. We have trust issues, to put it mildly.

Dan's busting ass around the house. It's like his nesting instinct has kicked in and he's moving furniture, clearing out closets, painting rooms... whereas I mainly nap and eat throughout the day. It doesn't feel quite fair not to help out, but the no lifting, no paint fumes makes it difficult to be of an real help.

12/29/16

I slept for 11 hours last night. And now it's 2:00pm and I feel like I could take a nap. Lately I have two main moods: Hungry and Tired. Sometimes alternating, but usually both at the same time. Tired also comes with his buddy Nausea, and they hang out with me quite a bit. The Bonnie and Clyde of this pregnancy, Tired and Nausea show up without warning and hold me up, guns blazing.

I'm not complaining. For years I would have given anything to feel as crappy as I do right now. I take it all as a good sign that I'm still actually pregnant. I actually start freaking out in the rare moments that I feel kind of normal.

One of the most annoying things about the last few months has been my stupid foggy brain. Simple things take me forever to decipher or explain, I have to be told things repeatedly and I can't remember things as clearly as I normally do. I understand it's a normal part of all this... pregnancy brain or whatever... but it's definitely one of the more frustrating effects.

12/30/16

It's almost New Year's - a holiday that's always seemed arbitrary and somewhat pointless to me, probably because I don't enjoy parties.

Years ago, when we were trying in fultility to have children, I would usually be glad to say goodbye to the passing year with all its failed pregnancy attempts, failed medical interventions, and months of the hope/depair cycle. And At some point on New Year's Eve, I would think to myself, maybe this NEXT year will be our year. It never was, at least not in the way I wanted it to be. But the truth was that EVERY year was our year; I just couldn't see it that way for a long, long time.

1/7/17

The dreams where I'm bleeding persist. I wake up sure that the dream was part truth and that miscarriage has begun, but nope, it's just my crazy brain living out my worst fears while I'm asleep. I guess we can rule out the possibility that I'm a prophetic dreamer.

I'm just over 10 weeks now. Our first OB appointment is this coming week. I'm nervous for it although I have no real reason to be. It's just that, in my experience, specialists are usually the ones to tell the really bad news. I've never gone to a medical specialist and heard "good" news. And I've been to a lot of specialists over the years.

I keep checking myself in the mirror to see if I look like I'm getting increasingly pregnant. I mostly just feel bloated, so chances are it's just gas.

1/9/17

It's been a strange day. I'm emotionally off-kilter, which accounts for the fact that I am sure that I'm not pregnant anymore. There is no factual basis for this feeling - I just believe that it has to be true. I think it's mainly because I'm terrified of our first OB appointment this Friday. I'm sure we're going to go in there and get devastating news - no heartbeat - and then ....

and then suffer the humiliation of failing at this as well. 

And it would be humiliating. After having been so joyful in the miracle of all this, it would be a really difficult blow. It would be just another in a long list of failures that prove to me that life can be cruel and that I cannot trust my own body. Having to face my family and friends and tell them that, no, actually, this isn't going to be a thing, would be humiliating. 

I am well practiced in the art of humiliation. I wear it like Hester Prynne wore her shameful letter. My letter is not visible, however, but it is burned into my soul for the remainder of my life, no matter what the outcome of this pregnancy is. My scars remind me to be humble because no matter what I want - no matter what I think should happen - what will be will be. And my desires have absolutely nothing to do with it.  

But for all its pain and public shame, humiliation teaches humility. And I have been humbled more than many that I know, but I am grateful for those lessons, and that is how I know that no matter what happens, I will eventually be okay. WE will eventually be okay. Because we can survive anything. 

But I am still terrified for Friday. 

1/10/17

I need to spend time in contemplative meditation, focusing on the life that (I hope) is still growing inside me. I have to believe that this miracle is possible because I'm sure that the negative thought patterns and stress aren't going to be helpful to anyone and they run like background noise in my subconscious all day. 

This inner conflict is exhausting, and as an Enneagram 9 it's my main weakness. I'm trying to maintain some semblance of inner peace, but it's really difficult when there is such emotional and mental upheaval. I think I have to actively cultivate and focus on what peace I can find or make, believing that there is still a chance that this will all work out.

1/16/17

The OB appointment went fine. The doctor is really good. Really kind. She used the sonogram (?) to find the heartbeat, which Dan said he could hear, but all I could hear was a flurry of thumping that was hard to distinguish. I think it was mostly just my own heart beating.

I have to go to another specialist since I'm of "advanced maternal age" (what a flattering term). We have that appointment tomorrow, morning and then an ultrasound in the afternoon. Part of that appointment will be genetic testing which we've decided to do since we'd rather know what's coming and be able to prepare for it.

1/18/17

It's starting to get exciting. We had two appointments yesterday. The first one was for genetic testing (all they had do is take my blood). That should tell is more definitively if things are normal or if there's any kind of developmental disorder (Downs, etc). Even though none of the disorders appear to run in our families, these tests will also tell if either of us is a carrier, which would make it possible for any child of ours to have serious genetic disorder. It will also tell us the gender, so we'll know in about two weeks if we're having a boy or girl. Yikes.

Then, in the afternoon, we had an ultrasound and there is an actual baby in there. We saw its little legs kicking and its jaw moving and we heard the heart beat. I don't know if everyone feels this way, but they didn't play the heart beat long enough. I could listen to it all day.

Also, it turns out that I'm a bit farther along than we previously thought and my due date is July 31st (Harry Potter's birthday!), so I'll be 13 weeks this Friday which means I'm nearly into the second trimester! I truly can't believe that we've made it this far. Just typing that feels a little like I'm tempting fate.

1/21/17

I'm currently sobbing because I decided (for the first time since we found out I'm pregnant) to get on Pinterest and look at baby nursery ideas. Specifically Harry Potter themed ideas. And now I'm sobbing because I can't believe this is real and because the first time I read Harry Potter was when I was 32 and undergoing cancer treatment after we'd tried unsuccessfully for years to have children.

And now I'm 37 and I'm crying uncontrollably because the wisdom in the Harry Potter books helped me through one of my darkest times and is now part of one of the most joyful times of my life and I CAN'T HANDLE IT RIGHT NOW BECAUSE I'M HORMONAL.

Also, at our last appointment, our due date was solidified as July 31st. You know who else had a birthday on July 31st??? HARRY f-ing POTTER. This has to be a sign that this kid is going to be a wizard....or that I'M a witch. Please god let me be a witch.

1/25/17

I got a glucometer and have to check my blood sugar 4 times a day to see if I should keep taking the meds for PCOS that I've been taking, and I only just realized this morning that I shouldn't be pricking fingers on my left hand to get blood because of my lymphedema risk on my left side. Duh... I KNOW this information; I've lived with this knowledge for over 4 years and yet and it took me 3 days of taking blood from my left hand to remember it. This baby is really using up a lot of my brain cells.

2/21/17

So far, so good. Despite my irrational fears, everything is progressing normally. I have literally never said that phrase in reference to myself.

Also, I'll share a problem I'm having here. I really don't like all the attention I'm getting with this pregnancy. I mean, I guess it's great if you're the kind of person who likes being the center of attention, but I've never liked other people focusing on me and asking me questions and wanting to know things. I'm more of a background-type. Just let me quietly go about my business and I'll share stuff when I'm ready. It's just so much... pressure.

I mean, yes, this is happy news. Yes we're excited. But we're also always teetering on the edge of terrified. And not because we're scared of becoming parents (well, not only because of that). No, we're just too familiar with how quickly things can go wrong, and so while we're pissing our pants with excitement for something we never thought we'd have, we're also pissing our pants because we're half expecting the rug to be pulled out from underneath us at any moment. (In this instance, pissing your pants indicates both joy and fear.)