#as if that is not his FUCKING WIFE HES BEEN WITH SINCE 2013

[bloodyke]

i hate men so fucking much

[siriuslysatorusimping]

Random Question (Another Level Extra)

Summary

“So, no marriage for you, huh?” Gojo asked, tilting his head to the side as he teased her. “No budding romances? No sweet non-sorcerers waiting to sweep you off your feet?”

“Non-sorcerers are definitely out of the question.” Rinko scrunched her nose. “I don’t wanna have to lie to someone until I know they’ll stay, ya know? Not exactly the best foundation for a possible lifelong commitment.” She paused, meeting his eyes again with a smirk. “And none of the sorcerers I know are marriage material, either.”

“Hurtful,” he teased, lifting up and putting his hand over his heart. “I’m offended, baby. You don’t want me to wife you up?”

“Especially not when you say it like that,” she deadpanned.

-

Kiko note: One of my favorite things about writing these two is the serious conversations they have while they fuck. This is set the day after Let's Get Lost and their conversation references Hollow Echoes. This is also posted on AO3

If you haven't already, you can read Another Level on AO3 💕

2013

“Kinda curious ‘bout something.”

Rinko’s eyes narrowed at Gojo, prompting him to grin as he rolled his hips teasingly.

His words made her tense in suspicion because him being curious while he was balls deep was typically not a good sign.

They’d spent most of the day in bed, just like he’d asked of her yesterday while they showered. She couldn’t describe it as lazy because he’d barely allowed her any time to rest since they woke up. Their current position was the most relaxed they’d been all day.

“S’pretty random, actually,” he admitted, his hips keeping their steady pace as he filled her over and over. “That date you skipped, why’d you do it?”

“Huh?” Her eyebrows shot up before dropping, furrowing in confusion. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

The question was very random. But such a Gojo question to ask when he’d spent the entire day ruining her in every way he possibly could.

“Told you it was random,” he said, grasping her leg and wrapping it around his waist so he could thrust deeper. Her back arched in response, a strangled moan ripping from her throat. “Fuck, that’s it.” He sped up briefly before settling back into his relaxed, lazy rhythm. “The date you didn’t go on last year. Y’know, when I-”

Showed up at her apartment drunk and acting like a jealous idiot? That date? She couldn’t even say she was surprised he’d ask now of all times.

Rolling her eyes, she yelped when he slammed into her once, his eyes glinting playfully.

“S’rude to roll your eyes at me when I’m fucking you this good, Rinko-chan,” he chided. Because bringing up the night he showed up at her place drunk and jealous while he was inside her wasn’t rude. Or the very fact that he’d shown up drunk and jealous in the first place when it was supposed to be casual. His grin grew at her indignant squawk, leaning down to capture her lips, biting her tongue gently when she released a breathy moan. “Keep your bratty comment to yourself just this once-”

“Don’t really see how it’s bratty to point out you being a-” she choked off when she felt his cock stab her cervix, “-an asshole.”

Gojo just snickered, moving his lips to her neck, nuzzling the ticklish spot there.

“Come on,” he murmured, sucking a bruise onto her skin. “I’m actually curious.”

“You’re talking about the time you showed up drunk, right?”

He nipped her skin in warning, and she sighed.

“Multiple reasons,” she relented. “Was a bit stressed. I’d had a long week already, and I’d just gotten a text from you telling me to send you my address because you apparently wanted to come spank me like the asshole you-”

“You liked it,” he argued, lifting his head to give her a smug grin and laughing when she clenched instinctively at the memory. “‘Least your pretty pussy did. Squeezed me so good then, still squeezing me now. Oh, fuck.” He groaned low in his throat. “Not the point, though. You’ve had to miss dates for shit, obviously. But I thought you always rescheduled ‘em. Was surprised you didn’t reschedule that one.”

She let her head fall back as she released a heavy sigh mixed with a whine.

“Ever meet someone and- fuck, right there- just know they’re too nice?” she breathed, arching her back when he rolled his hips to graze her gspot teasingly.

Maybe nice wasn’t exactly the word but it was the best she could think of now. She knew he’d understand, though. It was why he didn’t usually see people more than once. Thank fuck he’d decided she was the exception to that rule.

“Not really sure what you mean,” he admitted, sucking on her neck again. “But I think I follow.”

“S’why you have your little ‘no repeats’ rule, yeah?” she pressed. “Because you don’t wanna risk someone getting attached?”

“Obviously. S’also why I only fuck non-sorcerers now, too. Gets messy.” He paused, leaning back to meet her eyes as if he just knew she was making a face. “You are, so far, not messy,” he said, giving her a wolfish grin. “Well, at least not in a bad way.”

She couldn’t contain the eye roll at how stupid he was sometimes.

“Pussy is fuckin incredible, too,” he continued cheekily. “So it’s a win-win for both of us.”

“If only your cock was- wait!” she giggled, wrapping her arms around his neck when he narrowed his eyes at her. Licking up the side of his throat, she nipped his jaw playfully. “A win-win. Can’t deny the guarantee of a really good fuck is nice. Might need to make a copy of your map-”

She squealed when his hands found her sides, fingers digging into her ribs relentlessly.

“Such a goddamn brat,” he growled, lifting her leg to his shoulder and grinding his hips before speeding up. He made sure to tease her gspot with each thrust, his lips latching onto her neck as her cries rose in pitch. “Not a single goddamn thing that could help anyone fuck you as good as me, and you know it. S’why you act like a fucking menace so much.”

“I would never,” she breathed, whining when he moved one of his hands between them to rub tight circles around her clit. “Fuck- don’t- don’t stop-”

“Yeah?” he taunted, digging his teeth into her neck and pulling a strangled moan from her. “My little slut gonna cum for me like a good girl? Hm? Come on, Rinko-chan. Show me you can be a good girl.”

He pinched her clit hard, and a broken scream wrenched free as she came. Whimpers and moans fell uncontrollably as she convulsed, thrashing against him when he sped up.

“Just like that,” he cooed, his tongue soothing where he’d bitten. He moaned quietly in her ear, his hips stuttering briefly. “Such a good girl for me.”

She just whined as she felt him twitching as he spilled inside her, releasing a long, guttural groan before he released her leg and dropped his weight on top of her. His arms wrapped underneath her tightly, his lips tracing random patterns along her shoulder.

“Never answered my question,” he mumbled, and she nodded. “Said somethin’ about people getting attached?”

Catching her breath, she blinked around the sleep trying to pull her under.

“Yeah. Just- when you meet someone and kinda just know they’re looking for the whole thing. Date, fall in love, have kids type thing, ya know?”

He lifted his head curiously, meeting her eyes.

“You don’t want that?”

Pursing her lips to the side, she shrugged as best she could.

“I- maybe someday,” she admitted quietly. “But- this life doesn’t really let that happen. Name one happily married couple you know of?”

The snort he released made her chuckle, and he nodded.

“Can’t,” he said. “Parents weren’t exactly the happiest. They weren’t miserable, but they sure as hell weren’t happy.”

“Probably had something to do with having you as their kid,” she teased lightly. “I imagine it wasn’t easy. There were a lot of hits out on you pretty young, right?”

His scoff was paired with a dramatic eye roll before he leveled her with a bored look.

“Took care of those pretty easy,” he deadpanned. “None of ‘em had the guts to try anything. Parents were just… distant.” He shrugged again. “Guess I can’t compete much with you, though. Your old man’s a real piece of shit.”

She definitely didn’t need that reminder.

“So, no marriage for you, huh?” he asked, tilting his head to the side as he teased her. “No budding romances? No sweet non-sorcerers waiting to sweep you off your feet?”

“Non-sorcerers are definitely out of the question,” she replied instantly, scrunching her nose. “I don’t- I don’t wanna have to lie to someone until I know they’ll stay, ya know? Not exactly the best foundation for a possible lifelong commitment.” She paused, meeting Gojo’s eyes again with a smirk. “And none of the sorcerers I know are marriage material.”

“Hurtful,” he teased, lifting up and putting his hand over his heart. “I’m offended, baby. You don’t want me to wife you up?”

“Especially not when you say it like that,” she deadpanned. “Be honest, you never intend to settle down, either. Too busy, yeah? It’s why you don’t wanna deal with anyone getting attached.”

His teasing grin shrank a bit as he nodded.

“Yeah,” he agreed. “Got a lot of shit to take care of. Not like there’s anyone who could keep up with me.”

As expected. She’d assumed as much.

“Ever been in love?”

He snorted, and she snickered at his bored look.

“Have you ever been in love?” he countered, grinning when she snorted just like he had. “You can say you’re in love with me, Rinko-chan.”

“Sorry, Gojo,” she hummed drily. “But you really aren’t the kinda person I want to fall in love with. Emotionally constipated would be an understatement.”

“Again, hurtful,” he chuckled. “But nah. Never been in love. Kinda don't ever wanna be. Fucks people up, yeah? S’what causes some of the nastiest curses. Like the one from your exam.”

As if she could forget. She’d almost fucking drowned. A curse born from the hatred of a scorned wife. A scorned lover.

“My mom used to say she loved Naobito at one point,” Rinko noted, gnawing on her bottom lip. “She loved him when they were together. Dunno what the fuck about that asshole could be lovable, but she meant it. It- it fucked her up pretty good. She- always said she didn’t regret it because it gave her- me. But- not so sure I could do it. Be as strong as she was.”

Almost two years without her and it still felt like yesterday. Her chest ached at the realization.

“You miss her.”

“Well, yeah,” she said, feeling small. “She was- my favorite person. The only one I had for most of my life.”

Gojo nodded, understanding coloring his expression.

“Well, you got me now, Rinko-chan,” he stated firmly. He wrapped his arms underneath her again, holding her tighter than before. It made the weight in her chest lift a bit. “And Nanamin. Got a lot of people here for you. Hell, you can even say you’ve got Fushiguro’s brat now, too. Since you fuckin bribed him with those damn cookies-”

“Not my fault you didn’t think of that before me,” she argued, unable to fight the grin at his pout. “Don’t be jealous, Satoru.”

He just rolled his eyes and dropped his head down, burying his face in her neck.

“Thank you,” she murmured, twisting his hair around her fingers gently. “You- I dunno if you need or want to, but you have me now, too.”

His breath fanned across her neck as he hugged her tighter.

“‘Course I want to, Rinko-chan,” he replied, groaning when he shifted, and they both seemed to remember that he was still inside her. “Mm, fuck. I need a fuckin nap, and then I’m gonna keep you tied to this bed until one of us has to leave.”

He chuckled darkly when she couldn’t contain the quiet moan, licking her neck teasingly.

“Rest up, baby.”

[goblin-iz-whack]

Terri Pines

(Picrew by @potatolordofficial, hand drawn art by myself)

Yup, I made a Gravity Falls oc.

Teresa Ann "Terri" Pines (Née Ross) was born on February 14th, 1954 to Virginia and Howard Ross in Newark, New Jersey. She was the middle child and only girl of five children (Her brothers are Warren, Clarence, Leroy, and Seymour).

She was a pageant girl, her family lived pretty much solely off of the prize money she won.

She went to school for cosmetology in '72 (Her parents were not thrilled, they expected her to find a rich bachelor instead) and graduated in 1973 (Apparently, cosmetology school programs are pretty short!) . The money she earned doing what she loved wasn't good enough for her family and so she left home in 1974.

She drifted around, using her looks and charms to steal and con people, and met Stanley Pines in 1980. He was getting hassled by the police and she was like "Guess I'll use up my one good deed for the year" and helped out by pretending to be his wife ("Oh, honey, I've been looking for you everywhere! Sorry 'bout that, officer-"), and he evaded arrest.

Seeing her con artist ways and good looks, Stan was convinced that this was his dream woman- He tried to woo her for a bit, but she wasn't interested.

Because she's gay.

Even so, the convenience of having somebody that you can pretend is your partner worked for both of them, so they just went with it and slummed around the U.S., cartels and scams galore, what a wild ride.

Stuff went downhill, they were out of money and cons, when they were contacted by Stanford Pines.

You know the story from here.

Terri was kinda just waiting in the car when the portal incident happened, Stan came outside looking like he wanted to vomit and explained (through a very shaky voice) what happened.

They hid out in the house before running out of food, yada yada, Lazy Susan's eye is zapped, Stan takes Ford's name, fakes his death, you know what happens. Terri knows about the portal and all of Stan's secrets, she's his confidant and best friend.

In 1985, Stan and Terri got married. Partially because of the tax benefits, partially because they wanted the money and gifts that came with a wedding (Also, marital law says you can't be forced to testify against your spouse. Convenient!). Caryn Pines came to the wedding but Filbrick didn't (Fuck you, Filbrick). Terri's family also came but left pretty fast when they didn't get a hand out.

In 2013, Dipper and Mabel came to Gravity Falls. Terri is their Grauntie, she loves those kids. She also takes a motherly role towards Wendy, despite being pretty different in personality.

Terri is very similar to Stan, rough around the edges and always looking to make a buck, this is why he thought he was in love with her lol. She is a beauty queen, her pageant roots and love for cosmetology has always influenced her significantly. She is desperately trying to stall the effects of age (Hard to do that since she's 60 during the show), hence the spray tan and makeup and the hair dye. She also wears a corset (ooh la la!) and likes to join in on makeovers with Mabel and her friends.

She's also pretty badass- She has a lipstick taser and packs a mean punch. Being on the streets for so long has left her rugged and a bit grizzled and we love her for it.

A very motherly lady, she always wanted children of her own but the time was never right (Stan wouldn't mind being a donor, so long as he gets to skip out on any child support-). Wendy and the mystery twins fill that gap, she gets to mother them to her hearts content.

I will write up some unique episodes that center on her eventually, but it's 1 am rn and I need to get this done-

In Roadside Attraction, Terri flirts with Darlene alongside Stan. She's chill when Darlene only responds to Stan, she's a good wingwoman. It's also implied at some point that she went out with Lazy Susan before.

She was arrested alongside Stan in Not What He Seems, and escaped alongside him, also trying to stop Mabel from pressing the button.

Okay now here is where I deviate from canon pretty majorly-

So, I guess you'd say that Terri's whole existence in itself is an au. At first glance, the only difference would be her being there and extra interactions. That'd be wrong-

I know that the tweet about Ford being transfem was fake, but I still really love the headcanon. I headcanon Dipper as being transmasc and Ford being transfem would further the parallels between them without just making them a copy of each other.

So yeah, Ford is transfem here. She discovered it in the portal ("The author of the journals...my...sister??") I think she'd still go by Ford for simplicity's sake, though Stan suggested the full name of "Stanfordine" (Like Edwardine) which she goes with eventually.

Back to Terri and how she changes the series!!

Mabel and Dipper are pretty shocked that she knew everything, they're definitely mad as well. This is also the reveal that Stan and Terri are only really married for legal reasons.

Here's that reveal, written out:

Stan: -and then me and Terri got married. But we're just friends with benefits.

Dipper and Mabel: *Disgust*

Terri: What? The tax benefits! Duh!

Ford addresses her briefly but the rest of the episode pretty much goes on as normal except for the ending, Ford and Stan would both mention her.

"Okay, Stanley, here's the deal. You and Terri can stay here for the summer to watch the kids. I'll stay down in the basement and try to contain any remaining damage. But when the summer's over, you give me my house back, you give me my name back, your wife and I divorce, and this Mystery Shack junk is over forever. You got it?"

"You really aren't gonna thank me, are you? Fine. On one condition: you stay away from the kids and Terri; I don't want them in danger. Cause as far as I'm concerned, they're the only family I have left."

Well, Ford didn't listen because she and Terri get together (I call it "Terriford" hehe). I don't have their whole romance written out, but Ford has no clue how to date and tries to woo her with stuff she learned in other dimensions. Hilarity and cuteness ensues. And hey, legally Terri is married to Ford anyways, so it would work out in the end! Yeah, Stan isn't a fan of all this-

Weirdmageddon goes down, she hides in the Mystery Shack with Stan. She's pretty damn worried about Ford. She's part of the zodiac, her symbol is lipstick. Blah blah blah, she gets turned into tapestry like the others and then everything goes on as usual. She joins Stan and Ford in their adventures.

Boy that took ages to write. It was fun though! And I hope you guys like Terri as much as I do!

(My dear friends @ghosty-seapancake and @i-overanalyze-musicals helped loads with creating Terri! So much love to them! The timeline I referenced is by @fordtato so lots of love to them as well!!!)

[wwwhanako]

-> Relationships with the members (MAKNAE LINE) <-

-> JIMIN + HANAKO <-

ᴴᵃⁿᵐⁱⁿ | ᵖᵒᵖᵘˡᵃʳⁱᵗʸ: ⁹⁰%

Buy 1 Take 1

He gets away with anything just by being cute

Jimin pokes Hanako until she gives him attention

Hanako and the other members hardly ever argue, but if there is a problem, he is constantly present, quietly observing, to make sure everything is okay until they find a solution.

Jimin always make sure Hanako eats as she sometimes forgets from how busy their schedule is.

These two are sassy.

Hanako loves Jimin to bits and wil do anything he asks.

-> TAEHYUNG + HANAKO <-

ᵀᵃᵉᵏᵒ | ᵖᵒᵖᵘˡᵃʳⁱᵗʸ: ⁹¹%

Taehyung is Hanako's baby

If Taehyung is craving for something, Hanako will make/buy it immediately

He bugs Hanako to cook him food (he's just lazy to do it himself)

Model Duo

These two got so many company/agencies wanting to work with them.

Taehyung has a habit of playing with Hanako's fingers when he is bored.

"Excuse me, he asked for no pickles"

When Taehyung's food order is wrong, Hanako immediately goes and complains that they got his order of food wrong.

Hanako will ask Taehyung to exchange food items if he consumes something and is unaware that it is spicy.

They always look out for each other even if they are miles away from each other.

Hanako was the first member Taehyung was close with during pre-debut.

Yeontan loves Hanako!! Literally all of their pets love her, he jokingly called her 'Snow White' .

-> JUNGKOOK + HANAKO <-

ᴴᵃⁿᵏᵒᵒᵏ | ᵖᵒᵖᵘˡᵃʳⁱᵗʸ: ⁹⁶%

You thought Jin and Jungkook together is worse? Don't let these two stay together in a room alone or else you'll come back to them trying to tear each other's hair.

He teases Hanako.

She bites his shoulder as revenge.

Workout buddies.

She does the singing + working out because Jungkook forced her too.

She rarely plays games like Valo/Call of Duty as men aren't very nice to women joining their team. (Jungkook wanted to punch the fuck out of someone for saying to Hanako to make them a sandwich)

She only plays it with the 97 liners.

Jungkook is terrified of Hanako because she can watch a murder documentary with a straight face. (Jungkook warned Namjoon)

Jungkook had a HUGE crush on Hanako back in 2013-2014 but slowly faded away.

Namjoon and Hanako's child (real)

Someone asked Namjoon if a guy with a tattoo sleeve and a woman wearing a pink outfit was his wife and son, he said yes and ever since that day Jungkook has been calling himself their child.

BAM LOVES LOVES HANAKO 🤍 He gets so excited when Hanako comes to visit.

[minorfamilysupremacy]

Not an ask I just want to thank you because like most of us, I am also a grown adult who often can't keep updated on most things and honestly hearing that Bible is acting childish ..kinda makes sense and also I too am pissed off and over BOC

this post is for the handful of anons in my inbox and also @claudiasharon, who wanted to know what the fuck is going on:

while you're most assuredly welcome, i want to be clear that whenever i post about this shit, i am not enjoying the callout aspect of it. callout posts got us into the original mess and as a general rule, i loathe them. i'm just a hurt and furious former stan who got taken for a ride by several shitheads, and bible scrambling to revise history like we all got collective amnesia or are too fucking stupid to remember things that happened all of two years ago makes me even angrier.

his most recent claim, in an interview that hasn't been released yet -- only the promo is out -- is this (subtitles are in the promo, not fan-translated):

yes, everyone, as usual, bible is the true victim, and fucking pond even moreso, despite the fact that BOC has since produced a reality show, a movie, and two television shows (as well as one they made and then just never released, i guess? sorry wuju), and bible himself had 50 engagements the year build's career went to hell. it's a wonder he can do the interview with the boss' boot shoved so far down his throat, in all honesty.

he is also making up sob stories, complete with crocodile tears, about growing up poor (he grew up rich and went to an international school) and almost failing at his dream and letting the family down (he admittedly struggled with acting, but was a working model and studying engineering, an extremely lucrative field, so it's not like the family would have starved without KP).

it is insane how obtuse, callous, and audacious this fucking shit is. first off, we have eyes. we saw your fucking interviews and your quotes and the parasocial dweebs on twitter probably have your five-year record of bowel movements timed to the second. (of course, my information is coming from parasocial dweebs on twitter, so.) secondly, what the literal fuck is wrong with you? are you really looking at the guy who got his career destroyed, almost driven to suicide, had years' worth of dirty laundry leaked at a deliberately-slow trickle to instill maximum damage, and going, 'well, actually, pond and i had it worse :('

pond chose to sit and wring his hands uselessly over a situation he could have prevented in the first place had he banned sucking and fucking between coworkers at the outset. you continue to flap your jaws ceaselessly and try to rewrite history -- 'nuh uh! i NEVER cared about build!' -- like the internet isn't forever and a whole hell of a lot of people can't pull receipts at the drop of a hat. you are an unprofessional, mean-spirited, heartless, dishonest, unbelievably noxious cunt masquerading as a human being. you continue baiting the bear that is social media and then whining when the bear takes your arm off. both of you SHUT THE FUCK UP about build. SHUT THE FUCK UP. he is out of your lives. he is doing nothing to you. he has not mentioned your fucking name once since he apologized for the last set of leaks, while you have been spiraling into the image of a middle-aged dad who's been divorced since 2013 but still can't get over how his bitch ex-wife wronged him.

and even without build in the picture, you come off like a spoiled little brat. when your heinous show finished (and thank god it has), the first thing you did was run to social media to bitch about the ending and how much you hated it. couldn't even be professional for five fucking minutes, huh? you think you're some kind of golden god because you're the boss' current fave and you're sleeping with his niece on the DL? (by the way, homie, your subterfuge with that one is about as well-kept a secret as harvey weinstein was. we all know you're fucking and have been for ages.)

newsflash, shitbag! pond cares about you inasmuch as you're of utility to him! as long as you behave yourself and playact as his personal propaganda machine, then you're fine, but do you really think that the second he so much as sniffs a hint of liability on you that he won't drop you like a hot potato? i, for one, fucking hope he does and soon, because watching someone who was once heralded as one of the brightest new talents in BL prostitute themselves for the whims of a greedy, lying narcissist and torch mountains of international goodwill in favor of making a career as a professional victim makes my stomach turn. if you ever take a mike's hard look at yourself and realize what a chump you've been played for, i hope it fucking hurts you like watching you play us for chumps for so long did to us as a fanbase. but i sincerely doubt you will ever wise up, because isn't it more lucrative and convenient to be a soulless ghoul and not have to take accountability for being an asshole?

eat shit, dude. i hope when the ship finally goes down and pond's tied you to the mast, that it was all worth it.

[alegator]

hiii everyone :D i miss tumblr so bad and the ability to make long form blog posts ugh twitter is not the same plus the site and app are literally so shit. even though the tumblr app is not much better sometimes!! ive decided i want to post more on here to continue my little virtual diary…. I love the tagging system and most of all, love being able to look back and read my own updates!!! it’s crazy how it can help me recall the exact feeling of that moment… it feels special :) Twitter is great for quick fleeting thoughts so i wanna make lengthy life posts on here as a little time capsule, so i can have fun looking back and reading all my posts 10 years from now (if this site still exists. but i joined in 2011 and its still here so who knows). plus ive been posting my entire life on here for YEARS so who cares i will be vulnerable and over share and shit!!!!!! as is tumblr tradition… fuck it if youre my cousin on my homestuck side you can have my SSN.

moving on, here are fun life updates:

- celebrated my 11th anniversary on Feb 14th with the love of my life, Tenma!!!! i have been affectionately calling it the 7/11 anniversary since it’s been 11 years together, but also 7 years married 🤯 it actually fucks me up so bad that 2017 was 7 years ago like. genuinely lol FUCKKK HOOWWW 2017 should’ve been like 3 years ago. we choose to get married on the same day Tenma asked me out, which is also Valentine’s Day, and it was the best decision of all time for SO many reasons. maybe i will make a fun big post detailing those thoughts that another time!! we spent our anniversary day trying out a new coffee spot (so cute and SO pink omg), taking photo booth pictures at a new spot, exploring cute shops, and having an insanely delicious set menu i think maybe 6 courses? at a very fancy restaurant. i think 3 years ago we tried a new restaurant on our anniversary w their set Valentine’s Day menu course and it was so good, fun, and the best way to try out new foods so we’ve kept it going and i LOVE IT!!!!! i am already excited to see what tenma picks out for next year lol. finished the night by watching In The Mood For Love at our favorite local movie theater and i LOVED the movie, the whole end until bedtime we were just talking about it and dissecting it together. i love our life!!!!!!!!!

-tenma and i went to disneyland at the end of February for our anniversary trip!! ive gone before but they haven’t. IT WAS SO FUCKING FUN i am not a Disney fan at all but i love disneyland idk it’s just fun as fuck… um my feet were fucked afterwards lol but so worth it. one day at disneyland and the next at California aventure i wanna go back already but most importantly, tenma was already talking about wanting to go back and that makes me so happy bc it means they really enjoyed it!!! yay!!!! they even went on rides they thought were really scary just so we could try them together just once and that filled my heart with joy. then we also got to meet my online friend and had hotpot together. DELICIOUS i want to go back and explore LA next time and see more friends!!!! we are maybe planning a trip to San Fran in a few months though as the consulate is there to get my passport so that will take priority over any other trips☝🏼

-I GOT MY GREENCARD YEAGHHRHRHFJF!!!!!!!! ok actually i got it last year lol i wasn’t sure if i should put that on here but actually im so happy so fuck it!!! and then we celebrated by having a fancy dinner and I shared the news w the waiter who said he also did the same process w his wife! and yes i cried when i got my greencard idc i am HAPPY! crazy bc i got DACA for the first time in 2013 and then in 2023 i got my greencard… it’s been a fucking rollercoaster. and tenmas been there literally every step of the way…. Tenma is my rock I love them so much im crying typing this bc of how much i love them and how much they always support me and augnfngnfmg

-concerts this year have been Sonic symphony, kikuo/bo en/gus, Hannah Diamond, and hatsune miku (mikuexpo 2024)!!!!!!!! i loved all of the concerts genuinely so fun and next month i am taking my youngest sibling to a concert of a guy I don’t know but they love him so we will go and have a blast 🫡 idk if I’ll buy more tickets to more concerts but even if I don’t, it’s been a really really good year concert wise and i got to experience so many fun shows i never thought i would see live before!!

-spent time with lovely friends and celebrated old friendships and new ones yaaaay i love my friends and im blessed to have a good support system and I can’t wait to see what new friends I make in the future….

-I have a cold rn and took nighttime meds and unfortunately they are starting to hit so it’s time to say goodnight to tumblr…

If you read this far ummm ok weirdo… lol just kidding but i will try and post my lil life updates and pics more often so that not all my posts are like. months worth of writing… or maybe I won’t and the next time I make a post will be in a year idk!!!! this site is full of so many memories both good and bad and it’s dear to my lil heart, even if the feel isn’t the same since everyone mass migrated to Twitter, I want to come back here more often and make new memories whenever I can. goodnight 💤

[marnz]

hello friend!! i was wondering since you both read and write a lot if you had any recs for books that are narrated by death?

also! how is your original novel writing going? you posted a snippet to tumblr once of the opening scene i think and i still think about it because your writing was so descriptive and lush

friend!! please accept my apologies in this delayed answering, your message was so kind that every time I thought about it I got overwhelmed 🥰

Okay books narrated by death! The only one I’ve read is The Book Thief by Markus Zusak and it is gorgeous, I was so obsessed with it as a kid however it is about wwii in germany so ymmv.

however! I did some research and Mort by Terry Pratchett comes highly recommended (it is part of discworld). I enjoy Pratchett, he’s very fun. Death is also a big character in the Sandman Comics by N*il G*iman. I do not enjoy G*iman but ymmv!

I also am duty bound to recommend In the Woods by Tana French, a gorgeous, atmospheric murder mystery that is deeply spooky and unsettling. Death is not the narrator…but I do believe it is a character (many many interpretations!)

I feel quite bad sending you away with like 3 recs so here’s what I’ve been reading

- Exordia by Seth Dickinson - I’m not done with this yet but so far it’s like, what if every sci fi first contact military propaganda action movie…got lost and ended up being about the moral quandary of the trolley problem, Kurdistan, pink noise, and prime numbers? what if an author who hates imperialism and loves math decided to write a book length call out of Barack Obama’s drone warfare program with body horror? what if you were a cringe fail elder millennial in nyc that rescued a sexy alien with 8 snake heads instead of only one and every time you physically touched it was a sex scene? And this made the savior of the world? this book is for: homestuck fans, people who were in tragic situationships with their wife and their bestie, pilots, people who like their sci fi hard

- Giovanni’s Room by James Baldwin - okay if you haven’t read this stop everything and read it immediately. This book is for: tragedy lovers!!!! Gay people!!!!! Francophiles. Marxists. People who were into the social network rpf in 2013 and read that one fanfic where Andrew Garfield and Jesse Eisenberg get cast in a Giovanni’s Room adaption and finally fuck. Anyway. Earlier this year (or possibly last year?) I read a memoir about toxic masculinity and how it demands emotional alienation of the self and I was like “okay. I mean. Obviously?” And buddy. Baldwin says more about this topic in chapter one than that author did in his whole book. And it’s sooooooooooo beautiful god like every paragraph has a life ending sentence.

- the Great Believers by Rebecca Makkai - the year is 1985 and the location is Boystown, the Chicago gayborhood. Our hero? Yale, art lover, is trying to pull off an insane deal at work and survive the devastation of the AIDs epidemic. But actually the year is 2015 and our heroine is Fiona, Yale’s best friend, who travels to Paris to track down her estranged daughter and then her emotional repression stops working! I know this book sounds devastating and it REALLY is, like at one point I was sobbing so hard my husband got really worried and I was like, no, it’s all good, thumbs up! But ALSO this book is very funny and very joyful. This book is for: people who love to laugh. People who love to cry. Art lovers. People who love emotionally messy families.

- I Have Some Questions For You by Rebecca Makkai - a film studies professor & podcaster returns to her elite high school boarding school 20 years after graduating and find herself getting sucked into investigating the murder of her junior year roommate, who was murdered senior year and is now the internet’s favorite cold case. Please note this book is a response to #MeToo. This book is for: people who love True Crime but are also critical of it. People who love twitter drama. People who were losers in high school. People who devotedly at watch YouTube essays. Hot divorcées. Angry women.

I have also read a lot of excellent non fiction, the Murderbot diaries (just read themmmmm! Worth it), the entire Kate Daniels series (again.), the new SJM book, and some mid to bad books.

[peridot-tears]

The case of Jennifer Scott

Something that has haunted me since I finished the Black Flag game and novel all those years ago is: What the fuck happened between Edward meeting Jenny and the events of AC: Forsaken?

Chronologically, AC: Forsaken came first, and then the Black Flag game and novel. We have Haytham's perspective, we are introduced to Jenny as someone who's upset that their father wouldn't train her as an assassin and, ostensibly, Edward and Tessa just want to marry off. Haytham is a bit of an unreliable narrator, because the adults try not to argue in front of him, so we don't know if getting rid of Jenny is what Edward really wanted, but the idea that she doesn't belong in the household is pretty well-established at this point.

Decades down the line, after Reginald Birch kills their father and Haytham saves his sister, Jenny says in her own words that that was the case:

"I hated him. All his talk of freedom—spiritual and intellectual freedom—didn’t extend to me, his own daughter. There was no weapons training for me, remember? No ‘Think differently’ for Jenny. There was just ‘Be a good girl and get married to Reginald Birch."

Then Black Flag the video game releases a year later in October 2013, and Black Flag the novel releases in December 2013 two months later. It's already been well-established that Edward was a flawed father to Jenny.

The Black Flag video game ends with this girl having the guts to travel across the fucking ocean all alone to meet a father she's never met. She's the milestone. She's Edward's commitment to a new life and fostering a child's view of the world.

Let's look at the Black Flag novel. This man addresses his first-person life story (the novel's narrative framing) to Jenny. Like Haytham does with Ratohnhaké:ton, he tells her his background, and is even honest with how was cast out by his own mother when he came back to Wales. Oliver Bowden wrote out Edward's adoration and willingness to stick with his daughter knowing full well of the eventual gap in their relationship.

Meta-wise, we know the writers probably wanted to make Edward as flawed as possible, and also tragedy is like candy to Ube Softee.

In-universe, what the fuck happened between the events of Black Flag and Forsaken to make Edward neglect Jenny?

Maybe while he was trying to rebuild his life, he couldn't spend as much time with her as he wanted. And when Tessa came into the picture, and then Haytham, well. Even if you still love your kids equally, the way you treat them is different. Jenny was probably neglected.

I'm not dissecting this in the context of Edward-drinks-respect-women-juice or whether or not you can call him a feminist, because I think those are really broad terms for someone who's lived in at least three different worlds with different rules all before he's 40. That deserves its own post.

But it seems wild to me that Edward -- someone who married a woman who matched his energy and stood up to drunken assholes to help other people; someone who in his own words respected Mary Read more than anything; someone who took counsel from Anne Bonny and trusted her to be his quartermaster -- wouldn't train his ballsy daughter to be an Assassin, and instead groom his son to be one instead. Where did that double-standard come from?

Did he want to protect his child from that world? Maybe he changed his mind by the time Haytham came along, but it was too late for Jenny.

It could go back to how he neglected Caroline too. He left to seek his fortune, out of selfish personal glory but also because she'd given up her inheritance to live a humble life he was ashamed to put her into. And because she eventually left him because all he could do was dream about it. He left his parents -- and in a sense, his wife -- to chase his dreams. Maybe that pattern repeated with his daughter. Once he started building a new life in England, with a new woman, there just wasn't space to consider training her anymore.

I think he decided on a certain life for her -- married, with a good reputation in high society -- and dismissed her when she wanted to become an Assassin, because he'd lived that life and didn't want it for her. Even though...that's incredibly myopic of him. Did he really think that the girl who, as a kid who'd just lost her mother, crossed a pirate-infested ocean to be with him would want to be a housewife? She said herself to Haytham:

"I once told you that our lives were mapped out for us, remember? ...I was born to serve men, and serve men is what I have done."

And did he really, truly just want her out of his life when she got older? Or was forcing marriage on her a way to ensure she lived in comfort, the way he wanted for Caroline?

And here's the part where we could comment on misogyny -- maybe he felt that he had to protect the women in his family, and couldn't wrap his head around the fact that she could decide for herself. Mary Read and Anne Bonny were pirates he met and befriended. Caroline and Jenny are his family, under his charge.

I think it's a combination of selfish and selfless reasons, of course, but I wish I could have seen what happened while Jenny grew up.

[elderemorune]

Dad of Light/My Dad

So I just found out about Dad of Light.

For those unfamiliar, let me set a baseline for you. I'm a big fan of Final Fantasy 14, as mentioned previously. I get really into being a part of a community, and love playing the role of tank. Carrying my party through a dungeon and taking the hits as we fight back the forces of darkness suits me perfectly.

The game's been around a long time. The first version came out in 2010 with A Realm Reborn relaunching the game in 2013.

You may have heard some stories, about how fans of Kentaro Miura all dressed up as Dark Knights and formed a line in the major cities in the game to mourn his tragic passing.

And that's but a single facet of this lovely game.

Dad of Light is a Netflix project that came out in 2017, following the tale of a young man (Akio) who bonded with his dad (Hirotaro) over Final Fantasy when he was a kid.

Years down the line, Hirotaro suddenly quits his job without telling his family. Akio is concerned and decides to try to reconnect with his father by purchasing a PlayStation 4 and Final Fantasy XIV for him. With the help of his Free Company and friends, Aru and Kirin, Akio plans to use his character Maidy to befriend his father and discover why he quit his job.

Now, I haven't watched this yet. I literally just started, and it got me thinking about how much I love Eorzea, and how much I love MY dad.

See, stories about fathers and sons ALWAYS fuck me up. For a lot of reasons, but I think chiefly because I wish my dad was like any of these dramatized men. That he could apologize, mean it, and change his behaviour.

He's done part of the work. He apologized for being a rage monster when I was a child. For holding me to impossible standards that even he would have struggled to meet. He meant it when he took me aside in June of 2021 and told me he was sorry.

And the behaviour DID change, for awhile. We worked together at his tech startup (which is still just he and I), and we were doing amazing work. I was learning web design and constantly improving my own skills, because I wanted to be able to help him more.

Then his therapist retired, and he stopped doing the work to be better.

Then he put my wife and I in an incredibly uncomfortable living situation with my sister and her husband that mostly entailed her being entitled to everything, and when we'd put boundaries in place she'd just lose her shit. Then dad would step in, say something like "Don't make me choose between my kids" and fuck off like that would fix a damn thing when she was breaking the lease, up to and including bringing her then boyfriend in without even asking us if he could move in.

Then when we left that situation, he said he couldn't afford to pay Seattle wages.

So I left the company (under the impression that I had been let go), and I lived off savings for a few months after we got here. I scrounged for work, and had recruiters telling me I was worth way more than I was looking for, but that they couldn't find me work that paid the figures they were telling me I deserved.

It took awhile for us to even get things sorted here. We'd moved across the state to escape from my sister, and so that my wife could finally go to college. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't find a job that fit me. I worked for a temp agency for a bit, did a job for a big company answering emails. I figured it'd be fine, it's just emails. Turns out the customer service culture at the company was something along the lines of "All of our customers are literally the worst, we wish they'd just go away, but also we have to pay attention to super fine details when doing our emails so..."

I lasted ten days. Then I asked for my job back with Dad. Things have been better between us since he no longer owns our home or our car. But the condescension is still there. The frustration when I don't get topics he sees as simple.

He may have meant the apology, but a lot of the behaviour didn't change.

It makes me wonder what it would be like, if it started snowing in hell and I convinced the man to take up the mantle of Warrior of Light with me. Would he even let me tank for him? Or would he just run ahead and get mad when he died? Would he make fun of me for playing cross-gender? (Slicks M'Harbeck is the coolest, fucking fight me.) Or would he let me take the center stage and just let me help him for once?

I dunno.

I often say I love my dad, but I wouldn't wish him on anyone. None of my friends like him. My wife doesn't like him. But I love him. I know who he is, how he can be. He raised me, after all. It's hard to care for him because of his judgmental perspective, the way he was raised, all of it. I know some of his trauma, and it's not like I blame him for it.

But if I can be better, why can't he?

And stay that way?

I miss my dad.

Update: Just finished the first episode. I spent the entire time crying. I'm so incredibly jealous of the relationship that Akio and Hirotaro had. And so happy they could have it.

[yoyok-era]

my tears ricochet | E. Stabler x O. Benson

Elliot Stabler x Olivia Benson ♡ 942 ♡ Ao3

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4

“We gather here, we line up Weepin' in a sunlit room, and If I'm on fire, you'll be made of ashes too Even on my worst day, did I deserve, babe All the hell you gave me? 'Cause I loved you, I swear I loved you 'Til my dying day.”

Her brain feels like it’s on fire as she stands in front of him for the first time in 10 years. He’s here; he’s back. 

And his wife has just been the victim of a car bombing.

The silence is loud as they stare at each other. She wants to hug him, to hit him, to yell and cry and scream because it wasn't fair then, and it certainly isn't fair now, but she can't do anything but stand there and look at him.

“They tried to kill her.” He’s the first to break the silence, shifting his gaze to the ambulance behind her. “They tried to kill Kathy.

“Go,” Her voice finally obeys her. “I’ll meet you at the hospital.”

She can't keep her head on straight as she drives behind the ambulance. She hears Fin talking to her through her car speaker, but she's too out of it to register anything he's saying. He hangs up eventually, and she's alone in the too-loud silence again.

10 years. 10 fucking years. Where has he been all this time? New York? Somewhere else? Why is he only showing up now? The questions race through her mind faster than any of the traffic lights that flash by outside. What will happen now that he’s here? Is he staying? Is he leaving again? Can she handle him leaving again, now that she knows he's been here?

She eventually stops her car in the hospital parking lot and watches as they unload Kathy from the ambulance. They wheel her into the building, and Elliot stays with his wife, holding her hand and massaging her shoulder. It's the comfort Olivia wanted from him in 2013, and now she's watching him give it to someone else.

She doesn't enter the building. It feels like an invasion of Elliot and Kathy's privacy somehow, if she goes in. She's not close to them like that, not anymore.

She sees Kathy in her head. The Kathy from 15 years ago, flatlining in the back of an ambulance with a brace around her neck and a baby on her chest. She can still smell the blood.

"-iv. Liv?" The voice from behind her pulls her out of her thoughts, and she turns around to face her sergeant.

"You okay?" He says, too tentative and too careful. A stark contrast from how he'd been when he called her earlier that evening. 

She doesn't answer his question.

"I followed Elliot here. I barely talked to him. Kathy just went into surgery. How did this happen? Why?" She gestures vaguely toward the ambulance, tries not to let her voice reveal too much of how she's feeling about the situation.

Fin is quick to reassure her, and she's grateful for it. "Rollins is at the scene. A uni told her it was a rental car parked on the street. Kathy went to get in, and the bomb went off. Arson thinks it misfired and threw her clear." He speaks slowly, watches her for her reactions. 

Sometimes she thinks he knows her too well, and its times like this when she's proven to be correct.

"A rental car, what... where are they in from?"

"They've been living in Italy, Elliot had to come in for some type of a task force meeting, and he and Kathy decided to make it a trip,"

Italy. 4000 miles across the Ocean. 10 years.

"He just called me out of nowhere and told me he was coming," Fin continues. "I may have spoken about your award. I thought enough time had gone down between you two."

She ignores the guilt starting to claw at the inside at of her stomach, diverts the conversation. "Okay, a task force? Who's he working for?"

"NYPD. He's the international liaison in Rome. 

"Since when?" If he was still here in 2013, if he was here during Lewis then–

Fin knows what she's referring to. He doesn't answer solely because they're thinking the same thing. "Look, this is all I know. You're gonna have to ask him."

She turns around at the footsteps behind her, takes in the disheveled man walking towards them. He looks older than the last time she saw him, the bags under his eyes darker, his shoulders slouching, his hair shorter than she remembers. But his face is the same; the nose and the eyes, the way he walks.

He hugs Fin first, who tells him that he's there for him, and then turns to her.

"How's Kathy?" Is the only thing she can think to say.

"They're still working on her... burns, concussion, fractured pelvis," he sighs, puts his detectives mask on, and turns back to Fin. "What do we know?"

Fin gives him the rundown, and for a fraction of second Olivia feels like she back with the old squad talking about a case before reality comes back to her and there's a mountain of distance between her and her old partner.

"She shouldn't have even been driving... I got a call. I slipped away. I gave her the keys.... She was worried we were gonna be late for your award. I meant to give you a call–"

"–It's okay, Elliot, please." she stops him, and her voice sounds shaky. 

"Tell me she's gonna be okay." His eyes are filled with tears, and she has to be careful about her next words because if his tears fall then so will hers.

"Kathy's a fighter, you know that."

She stays outside when his kids arrive, tells them that she's there for them if they need anything, and stays outside as the family she's no longer a part of walks upstairs. 

[scattered-winter]

!!

this is rowan :] (playlist)

picrew link

the picrew on the left is him at the beginning of the story and the one on the right is after he's suffered The Horrors (tm) because this specific story is like a greek tragedy. every character (especially rowan) is trapped by the Narrative Curse and they're doomed to become part of the cycle that both made and destroyed their predecessors and their fates were determined before their stories even began and their endings were already written but the love was there. anyway

if you've seen me ramble abt the 2013 movie epic, then you'll know that I was annoyed at how something with such incredible worldbuilding could be sooo spectacularly shitty. so some of the elements in this were inspired by the movie but most of it is shit I came up with. but anyway they're a bunch of really tiny people who live in a huge sentient forest that's magically and intrinsically connected to them in really deep and profound ways (sort of a "I am a part of you and you are a part of me" kinda vibe because like .... the forest Created Them and they care for the forest and when they die their bodies decompose and give back to the forest and it's a CYCLE. everything in this is a fucking cycle btw.) but the king or queen of the forest is The Most Connected to the forest and they can communicate with the forest itself and all of its moving parts, and when the king/queen dies, their spirit merges with the sentient forest, so really the forest "spirit" is just an amalgamation of hundreds of past kings and queens and the actual forest itself, and nobody really knows if the forest was sentient without the spirits of the kings and queens or if it had always been that way. but the forest chooses each new king/queen from the people by sensing who's more connected to the forest than others, and who's most fit to rule. by tradition, the current king/queen takes the newly chosen ruler to live at the mother tree (yes, that's based off of actual mother trees in nature :] because I think they're cool as fuck) with them to be trained in politics/mastery over their connection to the forest. the current ruler remains in power until their successor fully masters their abilities, which usually doesn't happen until they're well into their twenties or thirties. then when the new king/queen is old enough (usually around fifty or older), the forest chooses a successor for them to train, and the cycle happens all over again

as you may have guessed, rowan is the next successor to the throne. but before he was chosen to be the next king by an all-powerful, all-knowing sentient forest, he was a knight-in-training alongside his best friend willow (the knights also have extensive lore but if someone asks abt willow I'll explain them in his post instead since it's more relevant to him). they started out as rivals during training, but over time became very close friends. however, once the forest chose rowan as the new king, everything changed. rowan was whisked away to the mother tree to be trained as the new king under the tutelage of the current ruler, queen olive (my wife <3), and willow was left behind to finish his training. because of their separate duties (rowan having to learn how to rule an entire kingdom and be the spiritual bridge between the people and the forest, and willow doing extensive training missions and shit) they didn't see each other for an entire year before running into each other during a celebration at the mother tree. they spent the entire time catching up and getting reacquainted, and willow decided to participate in the trials* that were coming up.

*the trials are how each ruler's inner guard is chosen; knights who want to be a bodyguard compete through a series of challenges, including speed/endurance/strength tests, contests of wit, and gladiator-style arena matches. at the end, the king/queen in training can choose 2 or 3 from the top 5-10 knights who competed. the trials are basically the forest's competitive sport that they all watch and get super invested in, and for the week of competition it's like one big long celebration (kinda like the world cup or olympics)

willow competes in the trials, and rowan gets a front-row seat, being the guy who has to choose someone from the ranks of competitors and all. there's 110% a scene where willow walks out onto the arena shirtless and rowan's like O.O

and obviously, willow ends up as one of the top finishers, and rowan chooses him and one another, sienna (<333) to be his inner guard. from there, they all live at the mother tree together and engage in Shenanigans (tm) as they basically just. fall in love and goof off and be kids.

but then. they get one hell of a reality check when queen olive is murdered by someone on the inside, and rowan, still a teenager with very little grasp on his powers/skills, becomes king. overnight he suddenly has the entire kingdom on his shoulders, and a murderer/traitor within his own walls to find, and war brewing with the neighboring kingdoms, and his only allies are willow, sienna, and ash (head of the guard, and formerly queen olive's bodyguard/wife). and this is where the themes of narrative cycles and being consumed by the forest really come into play because rowan is shoved into the cycle of Being Part Of The Forest and being consumed by it. and losing himself to the forest and the spirits of the past kings and queens. and the more he masters his powers, the whiter his hair gets (both as a physical symptom of the power changing him, and as a symbolic thing of how the throne ages/drains him even though he's still so so young. plus I'm a sucker for white hair).

I'm still not exactly sure how his story ends, because on the one hand, tragic endings make me soooo unwell but on the other, there's really no other way for this story to go. he's part of the forest and he'll be consumed by it, body and soul. just like olive before him, and the queen before olive, and the king before her, and the queen before him. this was always how his story is gonna end, even if it makes me want to bite through my drywall

send me a !! and I'll introduce you to an oc!

[what-if-nct]

just to say, were teenagers in your generation much weirder and fun than mine (i was born 2004)? i always think that those around 1985-1995 are just a whole new level of weird when it comes to fangirling and just being a fan in general. nowadays, teenagers are prettier chilled and sometimes even boring since they had all matured too fast for me.

maybe that’s why i always wished to be born earlier. must be fun being on the internet as a teen in the early 00s to the early 10s. even on tumblr. seeing all those blogs making posts on a kpop idol’s legs. you can’t even do that anymore without being seen as cringe and even peer pressured into being “normal.”

I'd say that it's complicated cause I was a teenager between 2006 to 2013 that's 13 to 19. And like if you were weird or a freak or honestly just emo or liked anime you were kinda exiled from the normal people. Me and my friends were treated horribly we just had each other. I know in the 90s they had beat the freak week which is absolutely terrifying I watched a video about it from a goth who was in highschool in the 90s. So I'd say there was never a mass majority of weird kids like there is always the "normal" people who dictate what's socially acceptable and others who don't fit in.

But I will say that in the late 90s to early 2010s the internet was where all the weird kids went and even had sites just for us. Like there was Myspace in middle school but vampire freaks branched from that. And Tumblr was just full of weird kids when I was in highschool no normal person used it like we did till maybe 2015. The difference is now everyone is on the internet it's no longer weird to spend all day on the internet it's normal and easy. So with that now everything online is under a microscope and you have to be normal to not get attacked for not fitting in.

Hell you can't even be over 20 in the kpop fandom while so many idols are pushing 30 like all the other millennials. Johnny's a year and half away from 30, that's a grown man with a 401k, mortgage and wife he has to come home to cause he knows he will sleep on the couch if he comes home late after I cooked all day for him and our kids haven't seen him in weeks. What about Jordan, Johnny? you promised you'd go to his game and Jessica, she has her recital . Johnny we both know things haven't been the same in months. I'm leaving you, Chris actually cares about the kids unlike you. Like that, only a handful of people would understand that imaginary tangent but not the majority. I say just like we all did before you just gotta find a space where people like you will welcome you with open arms like here. Cause the landscape of the internet just mimics the real world but even worse because theres anonymity and people are more callous.

But yeah don't be fooled being a teen when I was, was only fun with your friends outside of school and on myspace or vampire freaks. Everywhere else sucked especially Facebook , I hated Facebook then and I hate Facebook now. All my highschool and middle school friends need to know is im cute that's it they no nothing about my life or who I am cause fuck them. my stories just accidentally end up on Facebook through insta and I intentionally post the most vapid things I honestly hate 98% of the people I went to high school with there's like 3 cool people. Only keep Facebook just in case the one who got away finds me. Jacob I'm not shy anymore, I'm actually ready now. come back! So take that as to how it was when I was a teen.

[hugintheraven]

I posted 4,434 times in 2022

That's 1,637 more posts than 2021!

33 posts created (1%)

4,401 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@hikari-ni-naritai

@jabberwockypie

@unpretty

@tooquirkytolose

@laikaspeaks

I tagged 2,212 of my posts in 2022

Only 50% of my posts had no tags

#q - 787 posts

#politics - 249 posts

#religion - 108 posts

#lgbtq - 92 posts

#dracula - 68 posts

#d&d - 54 posts

#science - 48 posts

#history - 44 posts

#about me - 38 posts

#linguistics - 35 posts

Longest Tag: 133 characters

#it's impossible for me to actually figure out how good it is because every single possible change is infinitely better than jj's crap

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

So, some basic thoughts

The sequence of events is basically Chris Rock makes joke, then Will laughs while Jada looks hurt, then Will walks up and slaps Chris, then Chris tries to play it off, then Will says “Keep my wife’s name out of your fucking mouth” until Chris agrees.

So I think initially Will didn’t register the joke. He’s an actor at the Oscars, Smile and Laugh is basically his job for the night. Then he saw how Jada was taking it and reacted to that. Which I like. It makes the situation less “don’t insult MY wife” and more “don’t hurt the woman I love”. 

I also don’t think that was over the line. It was an extreme reaction, but this isn’t the first time she’s listened to jokes about her medical condition. It might be the last, though. Which appeals to me, honestly. It reminds me of high school, sometimes the only way to make people stop is to hurt someone. And Will kept it controlled. 

Honestly, a good reminder to all stand-up comedians, late night hosts, etc, there’s some jokes you shouldn’t make. Learn where the line is and stay on the right side of it. Or invest in a good dental plan, whichever. 

99 notes - Posted March 27, 2022

#4

Dracula Daily and Fanfic

So, I decided to look into AO3 and see what this fandom produced since the beginning of *gestures vaguely* ALL THIS. 

Historical context: Pre-2016, there were 166 fanfics total in the Dracula(Bram Stoker 1897) tag on AO3. 2016-2019, there was an average of 60 fics added to the tag per year. In 2020, Moffat dropped a BBC Dracula series and the fandom exploded, posting 242 fics in 1 year. 2021, things died down, only 156 fics posted, still far better than any pre-2020 year for the tag.

And in 2022, as of November 11, the tag has 320 new fics. Double last year, and the year’s not even over yet. Of those, 265 have been posted since May, which is more than the previous record year(Moffat), and this fandom did it in 6 months. Congratulations, that is legit impressive and I just want to say thank you to everyone involved. I hope to see more fanfics added to that list so that I have to revise my numbers even further in 2 months.

Now, some disclaimers. This data was gathered manually so I may have messed up some marginal things, and the practice of uploading other archives and backdating fics makes it more confusing. I have also not excluded crossovers. This means that this definitely includes some works based on the 2013 TV show(for example) that were tagged with this fandom as well, but defining a crossover in a useful way for my purposes here seems difficult. And I only checked the Bram Stoker Dracula tag, because the “All Works” Dracula tag will include plenty of other unrelated works. And of course, there’s fanfics that are in the tag for this year that aren’t Daily-related. But the conclusion is pretty clear anyway, this was a good year for Dracula fanfic.

181 notes - Posted November 11, 2022

#3

So, that one 911 scene is based on a true story

See the full post

223 notes - Posted April 25, 2022

#2

Summer is coming

Do NOT leave anything in your car that you aren’t willing to see melt. That includes pets and children. Yes, you’ll “just be 5 minutes”, but then there’s a line. You get some poor retail worker on their first day. And then you get back to your car and it’s 115 degrees inside. Don’t do that. Small creatures can’t regulate their temperatures as effectively as you, they can overheat and die very quickly. Bring them with you or leave them home, do not leave anything in your car. 

1,868 notes - Posted April 24, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Oh look, there’s a reason Elon’s suddenly become so transphobic recently. One of his 18 year old kids just filed name change paperwork. She’s going by Vivian Wilson now. All the support for her, and given how he’s behaved about this, hopefully one of Elon’s rockets screws up and renders him no longer anyone else’s problem. 

2,648 notes - Posted June 20, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[nightguide]

explanation of Carpel Tunnel Syndrome: a NT perspective

what is CTS is that this is a disociative disorder because physical disorders are affected from the brain become so if the child has it when they are born with it, then it is a non-curable state of being, not a syndrome. A 'syndrome' is where you have everything you have (literally able to function well as a full able bodied being) then you are making the direct obligation being 'one of the weaker bodies of being' by habitual living, it's not about that because all 'diseases' (diseases: a term for mass communication disorder that effects the ways of living and functioning together in a malfunctioned state of crisis of one being that is meant to overrule the planet over-inhibiting sources of mankind for one to everybody, able being or not) but in this case for an able-body to get a syndrome later in life shows their lack and ability to communicate with their heart (makes them a bad person in advance) which ultimately lays out a plan to actually being able to source out primary defences against them, they must not be dealt with much attention to or anything, Carpel Tunnel is one of the traits people with born disabilities should able to have and the money should be directly sent to them, it's the most fucked up part (i'm so sorry to say this but this is what you think vs how i think because i have autism and i've been separated from Matt (married from 2024 but mentally linked to him 'animatrix from 2013') for 10 years but associative disorder from him which made me heal from myself from Matt which is actually doing a grave injustice on his favour in actually reaching out to him for the first time in person, so he is able to get the syndrome if he lies to himself one more time because he denied allegations of severe life to measure mine from 2017 (came of age) to pursue responsibility of being heart to heart with his family under the spotlight/media/press to engage any rumours about me til i am of work by then, now i am 25 years old and i am aware to who i link with, and now they know that if Matt gets the syndrome, he is not able to live because it is a physical mockery of my ASD which defines my social abilities and cognitive functions due to the way the world changed in front of me to label me as 'able-body' to a workplace not suitable for me due to restrictions to work if i am not able to work out there as a screenwriter, actress and philosopher (womens rights in Islamic correspondence) Matt Smith (2024) is compliant to work for a living as an actor and so his money should be my money to allocate his rights to live but he is not able to work for pleasure, nor for play til my rights with him (sexual allegations) will be put on display as of for now. He is not able to work unless i pay him, so doesn't this.... tell you something, or so if he does at a minimum works for at least little to no pay as a result of his physical disability become, then you should know he has been working on a project (the death of Bunny Munro) from 2024 and it has been spiralling around the internet which dislocates access to his future income as a disabled rights to exist, because his inclination to work will display strong levels of fatigue in his wrists which will channel more and more symptoms become him, so that will also function Fibromyalgia and to much much much worse to come. Smith's agents are well aware and will not offer any more opportunities to come since Smith is yet to reunite with his wife in real life and ignore basic incomes for it.

if any body is able to be of present with a physically disabled able body, they should not be given rights to exist, no matter what because that is pure mockery of intentional cause. Meaning, they had what was there in them to be a good person, but it did not work.

i explained it here and here only, my word over yours is non-viable if it had taken you 10+ years for a better argument made from a virgin in 2013 UK. My statutory rights overcedes yours as a common display of heart not met with physical maturity in obligations of sex which is a psycho-seudo re-engineering of the heart, mind and body.

[dontlikeadam]

Evermore

My personal scoring system. 0-10 on how related to Matty and the situation I believe it is. 0= not at all, 10= totally fits

Willow: (10/10)

Taylor said this song was supposed to be like "placing a spell on someone" making them fall in love with you.

"The more that you say, the less I know" Accurate.... That fits both her and Matty

"I'm begging for you to take my hand, wreck my plans, that's my man"

"And there was one prize I'd cheat to win" I think she would always go to him whenever he wanted.

"You know that my train could take me home" train reference

"Wait for the signal and I'll meet you after dark. Show me the places where the others gave you scars" Still a secret, and obviously still seeing other people.

Champagne Problems (7/10)

William Bowery Written Song/ Joe?

"You booked the night train for a reason"

"dropped your hand while dancing"

Sincerity is Scary "After your show when you let go of my hand"

"This dorm was once a madhouse. I made a joke, 'well it's made for me'."

"She would've made such a lovely bride. Its a shame she's fucked in the head"

Gold Rush (8/10)

Originally always assumed to be Joe, but we were sort of confused by the lyrics.

"Eyes like sinking ships on waters, so inviting, I almost jump in"

"I don't like that anyone would die to feel your touch. Everybody wants you. Everybody wonders what it would be like to love you. Walk past, quick brush"

"At dinner parties, I call you out on your contrarian shit" Sounds like Matty

"And then it faded into the grey of my day old tea, cause it could never be"

"What must it be like to grow up that beautiful. Your hair falling into place like dominos. My mind turns your life into folklore. I can't to dream about you anymore". Him and those curls...

'tis the damn season (5/10)

Going back to an old love. The set up similar to go home after for the holidays.

"If I wanted to know who you were hanging with when I was gone, I would have asked you"

"The road not taken looks real good now"

"We could call it even. You could call me 'babe' for the weekend. Tis the damn season. Write this down"

"I won't ask you to wait, if you don't ask me to stay"

"So I'll go back to LA and the so-called friends who'll write books about me if I ever make it and wonder about the only souls, who can tell which smiles I'm faking"

"Time flies, messy as the mud on your truck tires"

Tolerate It (5/10)

Assumed to be Joe and them falling apart.

Could be either.

No overly specific lyrics. She does say "you're so much older and wiser" - could mean older and wiser than her, or so much older and wiser then they were when they met.

"I take your indiscretions all in good fun" which could fit Matty

Themes of complacence, indifference, infidelity. Could also be written about a friends story and what they were going thru, which is what we initially thought that the time.

No Body No Crime (0/10) w/ HAIM

A more country style song, since that was what HAIM wanted to do. Old school country song plot line.

Friends all working together to kill the man that tries to cover up the fact he killed their best friend (his wife).

Happiness (3/10)

Ending of a longer serious relationship that never fit Taylors experiences that we knew of. (7 year relationship. Would have been back in 2012/2013) Not an angry song, very forgiving.

Was always thought to be related to a friends divorce.

Does share the title with The 1975's happiness, but this was recorded first.

Dorothea (0/10)

Always thought to be about Selena Gomez.

Coney Island (3/10)

William Bowery written song

Break-up type song, falling apart

"and it this is the long haul, how'd we get here so soon?"

"Did I close my fist around something delicate" relating back to the song Delicate?

"Sorry for not making you my centerfold, over and over"

"What's a lifetime of achievement' If I pushed you to the edge, but you were too polite to leave me?"

"Cause we were like the mall before the internet, we were the one place to be. The mischief, the gift wrapped suburban dreams" Suburban Dreams

"Did I paint you bluest skies the darkest gray?"

"and when I got into the accident, the site that flashed before me was your face" "But when I got up to the podium, I forgot to say your name" - The only ancient we ever knew about was Harry as far as I remember. Unsure if Joe was in any accidents.

Ivy (7/10)

"My pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand. Taking mine, but its been promised to another"

"I can't stop you putting roots in my dreamland. My house of stone, your ivy grows and now I am covered in you".

"He's in the room. Your opal eyes are all I wish to see. He wants what's only yours"

"What would he do if he found us out?"

"He's gonna burn this house to the ground" burning down the lover house for Era's tour?

"How's one to know. I'd live and die for moments that we stole"

"So tell me to run or dare to sit and watch what we'll become and drink my husbands wine" Obviously cheating on someone you are very serious with.

"So yeah its a fire, its a goddamn blaze in the dark and you started it"

"So yeah its a war, its the goddamn fight of my life and you started it"

Cowboy Like Me (9/10)

This one has been a popular one to connect to Matty. His random love of cowboy hats from time to time doesn't help.

At the NME awards, Mattys acceptance speech included that one of his heroes considers there to be two categories of art. Cowboys and Farmers. Cowboys being the ones who like to go out and find new passages. Taylor was in attendance for these awards. They were 2019, right before Covid. Matty would have just started dating Twigs, and this may have been around when Joe and Taylor were falling apart.

She also say's "Im never gonna love again" 4 times in this song. Matty also says "I'm never gonna love again" 4 times in happiness (shares its title with a Taylor wong) and wears a cowboy hat in the music video.

"And the tennis court was covered with some tent-like thing. You asked me to dance, but I said dancing is dangerous game" Covered up? Like a fort? hahahahah

"I've got tricks up my sleeve, takes one to know one"

"You had some tricks up your sleeve, takes one to know one"

"you're a bandit like me, eyes full of stars, hustling for the good life, never thought I'd meet you here"

"and the skeletons in both our closets plotted hard to fuck this up"

"And the ladies lunching have their stories about when you passed though town, but that was all before I locked it down"

Long Story Short (7/10)

"and I fell from the pedestal, right down the rabbit hole, long story shot it was a bad time" GIRL I FEEL YOU. But also this could have been relating back to the year between 1989 and Rep. When she was being attacked by everyone.

"clung to the nearest lips, long story short it was the wrong guy, now I'm all about you" Clung to Joe because she wasn't doing well and had been almost cancelled?

"When I dropped my sword, I threw it in the bushes and knocked on your door. And we live in peace, but if someone comes at us. This Time I'm ready" This time she was prepared for the backlash? Prepared for the attacks?

"No more keeping score, now I just keep you warm" "No more tug of war now, I just know there's more" Someone she was playing games with.

"And he's passing by, rare as the glimmer as a comet in the sky. And he feels like home. If the shoe fits, walk in it everywhere you go"

Marjorie (0/10)

For her Grandmother.

Closure (9/10)

"Its been a long time, and seeing your name, still spell out pain"

"It wasn't right, how it all went down, looks like you know that now"

"Yes, I got your letter" - The 1975's All I Need to Hear Connection " I wrote you a letter, it was no use at all"

"Yes, Im doing better, it cut to deep to know you"

"I'm friend with my spite and my beers and my candles"

"I know I'm just a wrinkle in your new life. Staying "friends" would iron it out so nice"

"Guilty, Guilty reaching out across the sea, that you put between you and me. But its fake and its so unnecessary"

Evermore

William Bowery written song.

Gray November. I've been down since July. Motion Capture

She addresses months in this song like they are people. Months could relate to a different people? This is a song I never really could nail down a thought on honestly.

Overall a song with sad vibes, depression, thing falling apart.

Right Where You Left Me (Deluxe) (2/10)

"Friends break up, friends get married"

"But I'm right where you left me"

"Help I'm still at the restaurant. Still sitting in the corner I haunt"

"I swear you could hear a hair pin drop, right when I felt the moment stop" She has been wearing hair pins again.

"They expected to me find somewhere, some perspective, but I sat and stared. Right where you left me"

"You left me no choice but to stay here forever"

'Time went on for everybody else. She won't know it. She's still 23 inside her fantasy, how it was supposed to be" Taylor was 23 in 2012 so around Connor Kennedy/ Harry Styles

It's Time To Go (Deluxe) (0/10)

Reviews multiple situations when you just know it's over and time to move on.

Commonly thought to be about her label and the issues she had with them.

"He's got my past frozen behind glass, but i've got me" Him holding onto her old music.

[theunsuspectedmundane]

Thoughts #17 Girl Best Friend

I have been MIA here lately [not like anyone's checking]. However, a lot has happened in the past few months... years, rather. Damn, it's really been about two years since my last rant.

~~Well, here I am again. You know I'm only here when I'm not okay or if my life is at its lowest of lows. And I am currently at it again. I thought I was finally getting better. But no, life is fucking me again in the ass and asking if I like it. Geez, when am I really gonna be genuinely happy?

So let me start this off by saying, I finally found a man who has been treating me really well, beyond well but really great. I can't find the words to describe how amazing he has been to me. We were bestfriends since 2013, and who would've thought we'd end up together after 10 years. But unfortunately (yeah there's something in this for me to be here).... he has a girl bestfriend.

A girl (who is married at a young age), that he has been bestfriends with, long before we were even became close 10 years ago. They were so close that she has been part of his family while he was single for the past five years. She calls his mom "mama", knows what's going on in his family, she helps him with his vices like buying cigarettes and alcohol for him, knew his embarrassing moments, has been introducing him to girls she thought he'd like (I'm not one of those because he's the one who rekindled our friendship without her having any idea), sleeps in his room, he gave her a fuck buddy while her relationship with her husband was on the rocks, he became her daughter's second dad; basically if I didn't know them I'd think they were actually husband and wife.

My boyfriend works abroad, he went home last year and that's when we became official after nine months or LDR. I was head over heels, damn fucking happy, I was on cloud 9. But soon cut short when I noticed how she was around me when we met again with him. We used to be friends back in 2013 but not really that close cuz we're only friends when I'm with him.

It all started when she went to my bf's bar, crying because she said she and her husband are officially over. We comforted her, bought her cigarettes and just listened, I wanted nothing more than to go home and just sleep because I was tired from work but I really felt sorry for her. Her first red flag was when she asked me after crying why I knew he was going home first, before her, who is HIS BESTFRIEND. I laughed dryly thinking she was just kidding but when I looked at her, it felt like backhanded comment.

Second encounter; they both picked me up from work. She was at his place first and was planning on drinking because she was heartbroken. When I met up with them in his car, she congratulated us, and I can feel she was genuinely happy seeing us; however, what took me by surprise was her telling me not to get jealous of them cuz apparently my boyfriend is overly clingy to her. Like seriously? Do you really need to tell me that? I just fake laughed and made an "okay" response. At this point my boyfriend changed the topic and I was quiet the whole ride back to his place. I thought that was the only thing she'd say but no... bare with me, this is gonna be long and full of her toxicity.

When we got back at his place, I have no fucking idea what's going on. Although my boyfriend told me that they'd be drinking, but I didn't know who "they" were at that time. So when we got there, we waited for their two other friends to show up. As we were waiting, they were talking, me in the middle of them. She was opening topics that I have no fucking idea what it was. She was talking about his family issues, like really, infront of me. What threw me off was when she said "what is she even doing here?" referring to my bf's sister in law. We were at his parent's house. She then realized what she said, and asked him if I knew, in which addressed me like I wasn't even there. My bf got angry obviously but just let it go, but I was really uncomfortable during that time.

A few min, the people they were expecting arrived so my bf brought out an alcohol he had for them to drink. They asked me if I'd drink, though I would. I was overwhelmed, I knew I'd get drunk quickly if I would but my ego was pushing me to just go with it and took a shot of what they're having. I stopped and asked to go home when I felt I was such an outsider in their circle. Excluding me in their conversations and basically talking like I wasn't even there. My bf was constantly asking me if I was okay, in which I kept saying yeah. But now, I was not. I can't even stand to be there anymore.

He drove me home, and told me what his girl bestfriend meant earlier, I was just quiet. He knew something was wrong. I was not feeling it the whole night as he continued to send me messages updating what was going on. Apparently, she got drunk. Insisted to drive home, so he convoyed her to make sure she gets home. His family insisted for her to sleep at their house, I don't see anything wrong with it. What is wrong was her drinking beyond her capacity and making a scene. After finding that out, I realized I can't make myself like her. I will never like her being involved in our relationship cuz for sure she's gonna do it again, and he's gonna be there to be with her. I was not wrong.

Third encounter; me and my bf were quietly celebrating our first month together. It was so simple yet perfect just what I like, it was just me and him watching a movie and I was about to fall asleep when she kept on chatting him to bring some of the vape he is selling to her. My house is a few miles away from where she is. My bf insisted she pick it up at his vape shop but no. She just have to ruin the day. So we went out and drove to her. I didn't leave the car, I let him go to her. While I was at the car, I was overthinking and was about to snap but I kept my cool. I promised myself I will never allow her to do that to him and us again.

I told him what I felt a few days after. we talked it out, he realized what he did and that their friendship should have limits now cuz he's taken now. But his girl bestfriend doesn't seem to understand this because she would still have attempted multiple times to ask him for a few favors, like driver her to places, bring her for something. My boyfriend shuts her off with a few excuses and she would stop.

However, he did admit to me how he used to like her and stopped because he realized she's not the type of woman he really wants to be with based on her life decisions and how she treats men. But what hurts me the most is finding out how he confessed to her that if he didn't pursue me, he'd go for her and shoot his shot in which she didn't dismiss.

I'll cut this short because this is now a resolved issue between me and my boyfriend. I cut her off, unfriended and unfollowed her in all social media platforms. He is still friends with her on facebook but is not holding conversations with her anymore, unless it's for business purposes. But I sometimes wish she'd finally disappear from our lives.