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tonixe · 2 days ago

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mine ౨ৎ

A/N: I'm back, yeah I know. I've been out for a few months or years idk. I wanted to write this, cuz I love dad!kento, also this been in my mind rent-free, and just hell yeah. Also happy Valentine's Day, and sorry for the late submission, but this was part of my Valentine's book/smutbook on Wattpadd/a03 so just a cross-post.

WARNING: p in the v, oral sex, cursing, no condom we fuck raw, cunnilingus, not proofread lmao...

PAIRING: nanami kento x reader

WORD COUNTER: 3135

Every morning, it was the same routine just like before, children laughing at the scent of heavily waxed crayons and baby wipes in the air, and the occasional wail from reluctant toddlers and kids. You have gotten so used to the chaos of kids, the rush of parents dropping their kids off before heading off to work,

"Look Miss. L/N—do you like the picture I drew!" you turned your head to see one of the toddlers, standing right beside you showing a picture they drew. You smiled, patting their head,

"This looks so good, I'll make sure to hang this on the bulletin board," you said, crouching down to take hold of the drawing, the toddler smiled, as they ran back to the other kids exclaiming about how her drawing got to the bulletin board.

Yeah, it was the usual for you, working at the daycare. You readjusted your pastel yellow colored apron, and your hair in a ponytail so it doesn't get in your face, it takes a bunch of energy to take care of these kids filled with energy all day, the sound of footsteps echoed through the sound of yelling kids, you turned to see

Him.

Yuuji's dad

The moment he walked it, it made your heart beat faster, feeling your cheeks heating up. You were in a quiet panic, you tell yourself it's just another parent, and just another kid check—all a part of your routine, you breathed. Usually, he always on-time, greeting you with a smile—like he was happy to see you. Maybe it's the way he take an extra moment to ask about Yuji's dad, that made you feel some type of way—or the way his deep voice makes your stomach flutter just a little too much.

But today, he was running late. He was a little disheveled, his green, polka-dot tie was loosened, and his blonde hair tousled like his finger was through it a little too many times. He's holding Yuji's tiny backpack in his right as his other freehand is holding onto his hand, the little boy skipping alongside him.

"Mr. Nanami" you called out, a smile on your face,

"Sorry for the rush," he says, his voice a little breathless as he steps up to you, "Mornings are always something different with him.." he gestures to Yuuji who was practically waiting to be free to run around.

You let out a little laugh, crouching down to Yuuji, whose attention was on you, "Did you give your dad some trouble?" you asked, teasing him.

You watched as Yuuji shook his head furiously, laughing a little bit.

"No! I just made him chase me around" he confessed, with a cheeky smile on his lips. You looked at Nanami, who just sighed, rubbing his hands over his face, and making you blush.

"He's not wrong" he admits, "he has speed—think I got to start training if I want to keep up with him"

You bit your lip, trying to suppress another smile, "Oh!—I'll take this" You took hold of Yuuji's backpack, and you felt Nanami's finger brushing against yours—the sensation of skin against skin made you freeze for a moment, it just send a sudden spark thorough you.

The warmth of his hand is gone, as quick as it came as you had Yuuji's backpack in hand, your gaze flickered to him but he was looking directly at you. It wasn't a casual glance, not an accidental meeting of eyes—what were you even talking about,

You cleared your throat, focusing back on Yuuji, "Alright, Yuji! You ready for a fun day" You smiled at him, and the pink-haired kid nodded enthusiastically,

You stood up, as Nanami let out a small sigh, and ruffled Yuuji's hair, "Be good today, okay?" He patted Yuuji,

"I will, papa!"

You watched as Yuuji started running into the play area, "You're really great with him, you know" You turned your attention to Nanami, his voice was softer but still deep. You fl your cheek heating up, as you tuck a stray piece of hair behind your ear, "He's a great kid" you smiled.

He exhaled, for a small chuckle, "Yeah...he is—but I appreciate you looking out for him" he said, you nodded with a smile, turning a glance at Yuuji already playing with the other kids,

"It's no problem," you said, "it's actually my pleasure to have him with me"

He nods, taking a step backward, his attention now on his watch that was on his wrist, "Shoot—I have to go, I'll be a little late, picking Yuuji up"

"Okay!" you nodded, as you watched him leave out of the door, you tried to shake off the warmth that was still lingering from that one moment of fleeting touch, you started walking to the cubby as you put Yuuji's backpack in his cubby,

𝜗𝜚

For the rest of the morning, you tried to shake off the lingering feeling from that brief touch, it clung onto you like so stubborn thought,—you couldn't let go of it. You were focused on your task—helping the kids with the art projects, cleaning up the paint spills, and singing songs during circle time. Suddenly, you felt Yuuji tugging at your sleeve, making you turn to him.

"Miss L/N," he asked, tilting his head, you blinked down at him, "Yeah, Yuuji"

He grins after getting your attention, "My papa, thinks you're really nice.

You felt your stomach flipping, your breath hitched as you processed his words, before letting out a small laugh, a nervous one. "Oh? And how do you know that?" you asked, cocking your eyebrows.

"Cause he say so" Yuuji shrugs, completely unaware of the way his words send your heart into overdrive, "—And-and, one time, he said, 'Miss L/N, is really good with you, and I said yeah! And he smiled really big"

Your breath caught slightly, "Well, I think your papa is really nice too" you confessed, patting his head, you watched as he beamed, satisfied with your answer before he ran off again to join his friends at the craft table. Meanwhile, you were just crouching down gripping the stack of construction paper, realizing what JUST HAPPEN.

He talks about you...

You knew him to be polite, and kind—and always took an interest in his son's care, but the fact he brought you up in the conversation made your heart pang, even with the passing remark, made something warm bloom up in your chest.

As the day dragged on, parents started trickling into the daycare for pickup. Your eyes darted to the door as you helped give the parents their kid's backpack, you won't lie that you were waiting for him to show up, but it was going too late

And then, he walks in.

This time he wasn't rushed, his tie was still loosened even more, and you were able to see a little bit of his chest. His sleeves were rolled up, exposing his strong forearms that you definitely shouldn't be looking at—but everything about made your ovaries go crazy.

He had a small, tired small on his face as he spots you with Yuuji, sitting on one of the colorful tables coloring.

You stood up, walking towards Nanami,

"Hey," he says, his warm, deep voice made you even smile more.

"Hi," you reply, and you curse yourself for how breathless you were, then Yuuji runs straight to his father, hugging him tightly, "Papa!"

"Hey, buddy" Nanami chuckles, ruffling his hair, "Did you have a good day today?" he asked,

Yuuji nods excitedly, "Uh-huh! We painted and played outside, and Miss L/N made us animal-shaped snacks"

"Animal-shaped snacks, huh" Nanami looked up at you, and you shrugged, feigning nonchalance, "What can I say, the kids love it," you said, laughing—a deep, rich..genuine sound that made your knees weak. "That's impressive, I could barely cut yuuji's sandwiches into triangles without messing it up"

"Well,—if you ever need tips on some snack artistry, I'm your girl," you said, before you even fully processed your words, you were clearly flirting with him, but your words were already out, you watched him as he smirked.

"I'll keep that in mind"

Some silence came after, but it was all as long as it came. It was replaced by the familiar rush of parents coming in to get their kids. You stepped back, offering a small smile, "Well, you heard from him, Yuuji had a great day. I'll see you both tomorrow" You pointed at them, with a smile.

Nanami hesitates for a moment, "Yeah..tomorrow" but before he turns to leave, he pauses for a moment like he wants to say something else. He glances down at yuuji, who's busy putting on his backpack, then back at you,

"By the way..I was wondering...do you—"

"PAPA, CAN WE GET ICE CREAM..PLEASE!!" Yuuji suddenly yells, catching you off-guard, and interrupting whatever is about to be said. You laughed as Nanami let out an exaggerated sigh, ruffling his hair, "Sure"

You watched as Yuuji tugged his dad's hand, as you stood there, —wait what was he going to say to you? Nanami glances back at you, his lips twitching before sighing dramatically, "Guess we lost this round" he says, looking at Yuuji, "but maybe next time"

Your breath hitches before you can respond, and he just winks at you, leaving you speechless, breathless,—oh my gosh, you were just grinning like a idiot.

𝜗𝜚

The next morning, you were typing the back of your apron, as you tell yourself not to get your hopes up again, maybe last night was just a playful teasing, nothing serious—just friendly chit-chat.

But the way he hesitated before leaving, the way he said, 'maybe next time', the way he winked—it all replays in your head as you prep the daycare, wiping down the table with wipes. You shook your head, trying to push away your thoughts—you were at work, just another day, nothing special.

With the sound of the door opening, you turned your head to see Nanami walking into the daycare.

He wasn't wearing his usual collar shirt with a tie, instead, he was wearing a light brown sweater, and his hair was slightly messier. Yuuji was bouncing excitedly beside him, but Nanami's eyes were still on you,

"Morning," he says, his voice was smoother than usual.

"Good morning" you reply, forcing yourself to sound normal, even though your heart was still racing, yuuji let go of his dad's hand, and started to run to the toy corner, leaving you too alone. Nanami exhaled, rubbing the back of his neck, "So...about yesterday"

'yesterday?"

Your stomach flips, "What about it?"

He chuckles slightly, shifting on his feet. "I was actually trying to ask you something before someone—" he shoots a playful glare at Noah, who was completely entrance as he played with one of the toy dinosaurs in his hand.

You arch your brows, crossing your arms in mock suspicion, "What were you going to ask" you tilted your head, and he paused, as he thought for a moment, "You're really gonna make me say it, huh?"

You eyes widen for a moment, biting your lip, wait—

"I don't know what you mean"

He laughs softly, shaking his head, "I was going to ask...if you like to get dinner with me"

Dinner with Nanami, you felt your heart-stopping.

"Dinner?" your voice almost cracking,

"Yeah" he says, clearing his throat,

"Like a date?" you asked, his lips curved into a dangerous smirk—the one that makes your knees feel weak, "Yeah, a date."

"Oh..wow, I—uh, wasn't expecting that"

"Really" he arches a brow, "I expected that Yuuji isn't good at keeping my secrets" You glanced over at Yuuji, who was playing with the dinosaurs, and you shook your head with a grin. "I don't know...I think he's been pretty discreet" You smiled.

Nanami laughs, then exhales softly, "So..what would you say?"

"Yeah, of course" you smiled, feeling your face heating up. His shoulder relaxes, "Great—how about Friday?"

"Friday is perfect"

"Good" he glances at yuuji then back at you, "I should go—before he accidentally sets something on fire"

"Good idea" you laugh.

"I'll text you"

"Y-yeah" you nodded, as you waved him 'goodbye'.

...

You were staring at your closet, as your clothes were scattered all over your bed, the door wide open, revealing an overwhelming selection, but everything was not—quite right. Too casual, too formal, too boring, too much. You groaned in frustration, running a hand through your hair, as you pulled up another dress, holding it against yourself in the mirror,

it was an off-shoulder black dress, it was cute, simple, and flattering.

You looked back at your phone, checking the time, thirty more minutes,

You felt your stomach doing nervous flips, as you became anxious about the date, you didn't know how Nanami had been having a crush on you for the whole time,— the man who somehow makes dropping his kids off at daycare look effortlessly attractive, making your ovaries practically screaming—is the one that asked you out on a date.

You slip on the press, smoothing the fabric down, as you step into a pair of heels, looking in the mirror. The dress looked good on you, snagging the right parts of your curves. The sound of your phone notifications, you reached for your phone, he was almost here, and your heart was beating against your chest.

...

You walked out of your apartment, to hear the sound of a car pulling up outside making your heart stutter. You peek out the window, and sure enough, he was there. His car—sleek, understate,d and classy, just like him. He steps out, adjusting his tie, and scanning the street before looking at you,

"You look beautiful" he murmurs, a slow warmth spread through your chest as he compliments you. "Thank you" trying to keep your voice light despite your pulse practically racing now,

You watched as he opened the door for you, the gesture smooth effortless, like second nature. You slide in, as he rounds the car to get himself inside, allowing you to have a moment to breathe, you look in the sideview mirror, giving yourself another look before he gets in.

You were going to have him for the whole night—and you were so ready.

The restaurant was elegant, but not too flashy—refined, intimate, the king of place that perfectly suit Nanami perfectly. The soft lighting casts a golden hue over the room, the quiet hum of jazz playing in your background.

It was clear that Nanami made a reservation for this restaurant, everything about him was precise, intentional, and well thought-out. He pulled out a chair before he took a seat at his own chair,

"Is everything alright?" he asked, like a gentleman

You nodded, smiling

"It's perfect"

The waiter hands you both menus, you don't glance at them though, not when Nanami was watching you like that—calm, observant, his gaze steady and searching.

"I have to admit" he began talking after a moment, setting his menu down, "This surprise you said yes"

You blinked for a moment, tilting your head slightly, "And why's that?"

Nanami exhales, rolling his sleeves up just a little, revealing his stronger foreman that you couldn't stop staring at, his finger tapping idly against the table. "You..." you pause, considering your words,

"You're warm, bright. You make things lighter just by being there"

The compliment is unexpected, a raw in a way you don't often hear from him.

"And I assumed someone like you..would already have a boyfriend..or something"

Your lips parted, his comment catching you off-guard, by the weight of his words, "Well, you murmur, "I suppose you're lucky I don't" you teased,

Nanami's lips twitched slightly—not quite into a smirk, but something else.

...

But you wouldn't have expected to be here, your dress pulled up as you were bent over for Nanami, feeling his cock being stuffed into you, as you moaned. You half-lidded eyes, as he roamed your body, his rough hands on your waist.

'pap!, pap!, pap!'

the sound of your wet cunt being plunged by Nanami's cock, echoed through the hotel room—it was too much, gosh.

Your clothes or whatever was left of your dress was on the floor, including his, the smell of sex lingering in the air,

"Hngh.." you moaned, as his hips kept on rolling into you, feeling his cock hitting your cervix, making your eyes roll back. His hips slamming into your ass, with each powerful thrust. You felt yourself clenching down, tightening around his cock.

"Fuck" Nanami curses,

He leaned down near your ears, his hand roughly grabbing onto your face, "You want me to fuck you harder, don't you" his voice was a low growl, "Want me to shove my cock into your tight—little pussy" you nodded frantic, you just wanted release. His cock just filled you up, feeling a bulge imprinted on your stomach, as he fucked you.

"Y-yes" you whimpered, your body trembling with need. You felt his grip pulling you near him, as you felt his washing board abs on your back.

You didn't know how many orgasms you were through, but your pussy was spent, battered, and bruised from his veiny cock.

His rough hands cupped your breast, squeezing it gently, making you gasp. Your body arching towards him, as he rolled your sensitive buds between his fingers, your pupils were dilated,

You heard his low chuckle, as "You like that, do you?" his dirty talking making you more arousal, as you clenched down on him, "S-shit" he groaned,

His hips rutting against your ass,

He leaned down, his mouth clamped down on your nipple, his teeth sinking into your tender flesh, and you mewled out. Your body bucking against his body, you felt your body trembling, you were so close,

"You'll be such a good mommy for yuuji, huh," he said, his hot breath was against your ear, making you mewl, his cock was still fucking into your poor cunt. "Get you pregnant with my kid, and have you at home instead of the daycare" he groans into your ear,

You felt your orgasm building, the intensity growing with each passing moment. You moaned loudly, Nanami kept on thrusting into you. His hard cock hits your cervix again, sending shockwaves through your body. He leaned into you for a rough kiss, as felt his tongue forcing its way into your mouth, moaning against him.

You withdrew, coming up for air, feeling his finger rubbing onto your clit, harshly rubbing on your nub, you felt light-headed from his touches, as you whimpered against his touch,

"Fuck—you feel s' good" he growled, his hips moving faster as he jackhammered you. His rough hands guided you up and down your cock,

"Ken m'so close—"

you felt the coil in your stomach bursting, as you came down on his cock, clenching down tightly. Crying out in ecstasy, your body trembling from your orgasm, it was intense, feeling the pulse of pleasure radiating through your body.

You were riding out your high, as Nanami groaned in your ear, his cock pushing deep inside of you, filling you up. You felt his hot, gooey cum spurting into your womb, filling you with his hot seed.

"Haaa..." your eyes practically rolling back as you felt cunt being stuffed, with his cum

"Your so good f' me..baby" he whispered in your ear,

so good...

#nanami kento #nanami x reader #jjk nanami #jujutsu nanami #nanami smut #jujutsu kaisen #nanami x you #nanami fluff #nanami x y/n #nanami x oc #nanami kento x reader #nanami kento x you #nanami kento x y/n #nanami kento jjk #nanami kento fluff #kento nanami x reader #valetines day #im a horn ball lol #ovalution yes

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stevesgother · 2 days ago

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omg horny blurbs. struggling to take horsedick harrington! ‘its too big baby’

we all know i'm a horsecock steve harrington truther so here ya go anon :)

18 + below the cut

You knew your boyfriend was well endowed, to say the least. A pair of too-tight, blue Levis hates to see Steve Harrington coming. This was your first time seeing it without that pesky denim barrier.

You'd felt it, sure, after three months of heavy petting sessions in the driver's seat of his Chevy. But tonight, things had escalated past the point where the grinding comes to a halt and Steve drives you home like the gentleman he is.

Steve is being anything but a gentleman right now.

Your dress is hiked up past your hips, revealing a pair of baby blue underwear. Not the sexiest pair you owned, but it hardly mattered when Steve started to teasingly slide them down the meat of your thighs.

"You're shaking, honey. Is everything okay?" He asks you so tenderly as he gentle holds your trembling palm in his larger calloused one.

"Yeah-- Yeah, I'm just," a pause, "you're really big." You admit sheepishly.

"We'll go slow, baby, I promise." He reassures you as the hand that's not holding yours strokes the side of your cheek. He kisses you languidly as his thick digits circle your clit tantalizingly slow, "Can I touch you here?"

You nod a little desperately and he hums in acknowledgment. His middle finger breeches your entrance and he curls them inside of you; perfectly bumping your most sensitive spot in a way you've never been able to on your own.

You keen and Steve takes the opportunity to suckle on the spot just below your ear, eliciting a whine from you. You decide you should probably return the favor, even if it's hard to focus on anything except the way Steve is fucking you on his fingers.

His cock is frankly huge. It's not only long but girthy too, with an upward curve. The thought alone of fucking yourself on it makes your mouth water as you wrap a hand around his shaft. He gasps in surprise at the motion, evidently not expecting it. You run a thumb over his leaking, red slit and he groans your name.

"Want you to fuck me, Steve," you whisper against his lips as he begins to kiss you again.

"You're sure?"

You nod fervently and that's all the confirmation he needs to line his head up with your sopping heat. His hands find your hips, lifting you and then slowly lowering you back down until you're able to take him to the hilt.

It's a big stretch. Any partner you might've had in the past could've never prepared you for the sheer size of Steve. It burns deliciously as you're being sheathed with him, but it quickly becomes overwhelming.

"You're too big, baby, I can't"

"Shh," he shushes as he pulls you flush to his chest in a strong embrace, "yes you can, sweetheart, I've got ya'"

Once you're fully seated on him, it's as if you were made to fit. The thatch of hair on his pubic bone provides the perfect amount of stimulation on your throbbing clit as you begin to ride him.

"God-- you're so tight, fuck," he's already panting and you'd be lying if you said it wasn't a bit of an ego boost.

His words give you the confidence to bounce on him a bit faster. You can feel him in your stomach, practically rearranging your guts. Every time you sink back down, his ruddy head hits that perfect spot inside you, sending you hurtling towards your orgasm embarrassingly fast.

"Good girl," he groans, "keep bouncing on my cock, baby, that's it."

Whereas before you were more reserved in how vocal you were during sex, now you're crying out without restraint; chanting Steve's name like a prayer.

When he feels himself becoming close, he swiftly moves a thumb to play with your sensitive button-- needing to get you off before himself at least once. His own personal rule.

"Oh! Yeah, Steve-- don't stop, don't stop--" you're all but shouting now.

"I won't, baby, I won't--" he assures, "that's the spot, huh? Can feel you squeezin' me-- ah!"

You come with a cry of his name, your hands tangled in his chestnut hair, giving Steve the greenlight to let himself finish. Both hands grab you abruptly to life your hips enough for him to pull out.

With a few more quick strokes of his cock he's coming with his head thrown back and several heady grunts. You lean forward to kiss and nip at the constellation of beauty marks along his stubbly neck. They're one of the first things you'd noticed about him when you met.

"Was that good for you?" He pants as he comes back down to Earth with you.

You stroke the side of his face with your hand, pushing the damp hairs that stick to his forehead away before kissing the spot where they had been, "That was amazing, Stevie."

He gives you a short peck to your plush and waiting lips before once again pulling you in. You stay just like that, flesh to flesh, and count the stars until the sun rises again to replace the moon.

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bunny-jpeg · 2 days ago

Text

quenching a thirst

daniel ricciardo

request: is there any possibility to have 2 and 10 with daniel for the valentines ask? 2. “i’ve never wanted anyone to fuck me this badly.” + 10. “we’re in public, you know.”

tags: smut/pwp, semi-public sex (in a closet), assistant!reader, secret relationship, oral sex (reader receives), quick & messy, hair pulling

eros (the valentine's collection)

"danny." you said as you placed your hands on his chest. it only encouraged him to lean in closer to you. you said a little more sternly, "danny."

"no one is watching, just one kiss. i want to taste that lip gloss of yours when i talk to the reporters." he licked his lips. you hated that there was something about him that made you flustered. flirting came natural to him and it made you feel warm all over.

you held onto your clipboard in your free hand and said, "and they could come bargaining in at any second. you want to be on the news for being at this charity event, not for kissing your assistant." but daniel still captured your lips in his.

when he pulled away, he licked his lips and said, "mmm, apple pie."

but you knew one kiss wouldn't calm down daniel's need for you. one kiss turned into two and two often turned into three rounds of sex in the closest bad you could find. you knew you had every chance to say no, but the charm of daniel ricciardo was undeniable.

even when he got on your nerves at times. you gave him several small kisses and one long make-out session with his tongue in your mouth before he was able to do his interviews. you tried to deny the heat between your legs while you watched him from the sidelines. you could see the slight shine on his lips, obvious from your kisses.

you had been secretly seeing daniel for about six months. you had been his assistant for over a year and a half, all that time together let something bloom between you two. nights spent between races, the home-cooked meals you made him try, that one time you held his hand while he got his newest tattoo.

you two were close and daniel loved you. which was why he yearned for your kisses. and why he whined when you refused to give him more. he was insatiable at times, but yet it made you flustered. like when he kissed you and ran his tongue across your bottom lip.

"we're in public you know." you said as you ended up pressed against the wall of a hallway. you moaned into another kiss when he pinched you behind.

you knew it didn't actually matter. you could publicly date him with little to no fuss. but you didn't want people to think you got your job because you were sleeping with your boss. daniel understood, he respected that you wanted to be seen with integrity. but that didn't lessen his need for your kisses and your love.

"sorry, babe." he said sweetly, "i like when you make sure i'm well taken care of. i feel like i should do the same considering how needy you get."

you chuckled, warmed by his words, "what do you me to say? i've never wanted anyone to fuck me this badly? get on my knees for you." you held onto his strong shoulders. you were totally smitten.

the allure he had over you, you were both alone in the hallway with his lips on yours. he said lowly, "i want you. i want to taste you. i don't think i can wait till we get back home." his large hands were on your hips. he held you close and licked his top lip.

"you're insatiable, ricciardo."

he leaned in further, "i know, but you love me. just like how i love you." you quickly ended up in a supply closet with your back up against a few shelves.

"fuck." you whispered as daniel quickly and quietly closed the door and turned on the low light. even in the dim light he looked good, you eyes him as he got to his knees and hiked up your short skirt. you covered your mouth as he pulled your panties down and exposed your pussy to him.

"look at you." he mused quietly, "you look so good. i et you taste so sweet. when i was talking to the press i thought about you. how i'd rather be back home with my head between your thighs." and chuckled before he heard you quietly moan.

"danny." you said and tensed up as he kissed your pussy. he held onto your soft thighs with your skirt pushed up to your waist and your panties to your ankles. you leaned further against the shelves.

his tongue was talented, and with a pussy as perfect as yours he only wanted to make you feel good. he groaned against your cunt and licked at it. he could feel heat in his body, the air in the cramped space got warmer. his cock throbbed in his jeans. he held on a little tighter and pressed his nose further into your sex.

your wetness stained his lips more than your lip gloss did earlier. while daniel liked the apple pie flavour, your pussy tasted better. you moaned and tried to keep yourself composed. you couldn't be too loud or else people would start to get curious. you covered your mouth once more with one hand and held onto his short dark hair with the other.

daniel groaned against your pussy when you gave his hair a short tug. he licked your stiff clit and felt an electric feeling move through him. you tasted divine. he pressed further, he couldn't get enough. your pussy was the most divine of tastes and it made daniel eager to have more.

his attention on your clit made your body tense up as pleasure raced through you. "danny." you said in a hushed tone, "right there, fuck. i love when you tease my clit." you shakily exhaled and held onto his hand with both hands now. it all felt overwhelming in the best way possible, but you couldn't cause a scene right now.

you didn't want to be public with your relationship at that time, you knew what a hard launch was. but you didn't want to launch your relationship because someone cause daniel's head between your legs!

he looked up at you and dragged his tongue messily across your cunt. your wetness drooled down his chin. he was a messy eater. it was endearing, almost cute. you felt a wobble in your knees as he admired you for a moment before he went back to orally pleasuring you.

you felt the lingering heat in your body and swore under your breath. his large hands held onto your thighs and he licked your sopping wet sex. you whimpered as his movements and you knew you weren't going to last much longer.

daniel felt the strain in his jeans as he continued to pleasure your pussy with a talented eagerness. he could feel the pre-cum stain the front of his briefs. he couldn't care less. not when he had a mission. your eager noises only pulled him in closer and he loved how you tasted. it was like a taste of heaven and your noises were angel choirs, it made his heart sing. it felt good as he applied more pressure to his movements and then felt you quiver around him.

in a cramped storage room, daniel feasted on your beautifully slick cunt and your hushed pleasured noises. you felt blissed out as he only worked himself harder against you.

daniel loved you, that was certain. he knew it from the bottom of his heart. he ached for you, needed to be close to you. even when you tried to do your job. you held on a little tighter and pushed your pussy up against him. he could feel your love through your pussy up against his face.

"please. fuck, yes." you near squeaked as the pleasure reached its pack. you shakily exhaled in an attempt to hold back a moan. silence was key. it was heated in the closet, the sweat dampened your back as your breathed heavily.

daniel's moan was muffled by your pussy and felt the tension in your thighs. he gave you one last lick and felt your orgasm cross through you. he looked up and watched you have to cover your mouth as you came. your knees shook as the intense feeling washed over you. a small noise spilled from his lips. you cursed under your breath as you relaxed a little.

daniel pulled away and wiped his wet mouth with the back of his hand. he chuckled lightly and let himself remain excited. he grinned at you, "pretty girl." then helped you back into your panties before he pushed your skirt down over your thighs.

"i'm not making this a habit." you said pointedly. daniel got back to his feel, he kissed you on the cheek before he wiped his wet mouth.

"of course." he wrapped his arms around you, "next time we'll just leave easily and i can see how loud you can get." then winked.

you playfully pushed his chest, "you're insatiable, danny."

"i know, but only for you." <3

196 notes · View notes

hwaslayer · 2 days ago

Text

wildfire (cs) | thirteen.

—spotify playlist | series masterlist

—summary: assistant professor in bioengineering, incredibly attractive, lonely and divorced; that’s how most people describe san. but despite the events that have happened in his life, san has a lot going for himself. he’s a successful, sought out professor due to his brilliant contributions to science at just an early age of 32. he worked hard to get where he was now; head deep into his research, his publications, building his lab and creating a name for himself. everything was good and smooth sailing— until it wasn’t. because when he meets you, a bioengineering grad student interested in rotating in his lab, he finds himself ready to risk all the blood, sweat and tears he put in throughout the years just to keep you close— his need for you spiraling out of control like a wildfire.

—pairing: asst. professor!choi san x grad student!f. reader

—genre: (18+ - minors dni) strangers to lovers, grad school au | fluff, angst, smut

—word count: 7k

—chapter content/warnings: cussing, we catch a lil moment with belle 🙄, crying .. lots of crying, just lots of hurt and heartache, more misunderstandings, we see a bit of parents from both sides - esp san's dynamic with his father, flashback scene with smut: oral (f. receiving), 🤠, praises, lots of sweet kisses and tender moments, some nipple play, soft and slow smut!!

—a/n: fic announcement soon!

If the texts yesterday afternoon weren't nerve-wracking enough, it was the downtime in between the texts and seeing San that had you ready to curl up in a ball out of anxiety; fetal position, rocking back and forth as an attempt to rid the feeling. San hadn't texted much after deciding the two of you should talk the following day, and you never questioned why he couldn't just see you the same night he had told you he needed to talk.

you: 😞 you didn't even look my way when you walked back into the office and i haven't heard from you all day.

you: i hate how all my papers and presentations are due this week. plus ppl have been weird, idk. i just wanna cuddle 😭

san: i'm sorry. it's just been a day.

you: that's never stopped you before... ☹️ what's wrong, san?

san: we should talk, baby.

you: oh.. okay. so let's talk tonight? i just need to finish up a few things, and i'm halfway done on most of my papers and presentations. i think they can wait a bit.

san: no, you should finish up. i've got a ton of things to catch up on so tonight won't work. can we do this tomorrow? i'll come pick you up once we're both done in the lab.

you: are you sure?

san: mhm. i'm sorry again, it really just has been kinda all over the place today.

you: it's fine, san. as long as you can promise me we're okay?

san: we will be. i'll talk to you tomorrow, okay? try to take breaks and rest well.

You accepted it, even if it felt excruciating and painfully long.

These things never turn out well, and you knew your case wasn't gonna be an exception. You were afraid for it, you were nervous and you were wondering what San might do to try and lessen the blow of whatever was coming.

He wouldn't hurt you, right?

He meant it when he said you two would be okay, right?

Even if he tried to be as reassuring, everything about it felt off and cryptic. None of it felt like sunshine and rainbows, none of it felt like the San you felt in love with. None of it felt like the giddy excitement, the comfort, the safety you had come to know and love.

You hated automatically assuming the worse, but nothing was preventing you from doing so— not even San.

Today was actually pretty uneventful, nonetheless. Despite the wait and silence from San, you felt like you managed to get by in one piece. It still felt like everyone was looking at you; like they had all known your deepest, darkest secrets. Like they had been following your every move, especially while you were with San. It still felt awful, but you had learned how to push aside because people could talk and assume— but they would never know the true story.

And who knows? Even if you tried to explain yourself, they wouldn't get it.

You didn't really owe that explanation to anyone, you think.

The only other weird part about your day was when you had tried to help Belle earlier since you had some downtime and she brushed you off completely. She had been avoiding you, and it was pretty obvious she was letting the talk get to her head. She didn't maintain eye contact with you, she didn't acknowledge you, and she didn't talk to you the way that she used to.

—FLASHBACK

You walk into the lab, passing by a few of your labmates with a tiny, toothless smile etched on your lips. There was no Sunwoo around, but there was Belle; yet, she still hadn't turned to acknowledge your presence. You had gotten through your to-do list for Sunwoo's project, leaving you with extra time to spare today. You hadn't been able to dedicate a lot of your support to Belle lately due to all those technical issues you needed to troubleshoot for your project with Sunwoo, and you figured this would be a good time to make up for it.

Unless she had other plans.

"Hey Belle!" You come to her desk, pulling the courage from deep down within you to approach her first. She looks up at you, a brow cocked up before returning her attention to her laptop. "I have some time to help—"

"No thanks, I'm good." She doesn't look at you. "Just so you know, I don't really need extra help anymore. I've got everything figured out already."

"Oh, okay." You step away from her desk, fiddling with your fingers while you stand there looking dumb. "Are you sure?" She pauses her typing before finally looking back up at you with her brows knit tightly together.

"I just said it, didn't I?"

"I-I'm sorry, I just wanted to make sure since I had the time and I haven't been able to help you out as much cause of Sunwoo's project."

"Why don't you go and use your extra time with Professor Choi since you've been doing that anyway?" She gives you a look that settles in the pit of your stomach. You don't say anything to her, even as she shuts her laptop close and stands— brushing past you to get to one of the behavior rooms. You feel a bit hurt, and your other labmates aren't even paying attention to the whole thing; or, maybe they are, and they just don't wanna say anything to dig deeper into the wound.

So, you turn on your heel with your head down, returning to your desk to continue your data analysis in silence.

—END

You try to tell yourself that it doesn't really matter— that you didn't need anyone's reassurance or validation. It hurt despite not being super close to Belle, but you knew she thought of you in a different light now and that wasn't really fair. You could see how it'd look problematic on the surface, but you thought she knew you better than that.

Guess it's also your fault for assuming.

When it's time for San to pick you up at your usual pick-up spot, you grab your keys and head out— still not having changed out of your outfit for the day. You try to take slow steps to not seem too eager, but you can't help it when you see San parked in his usual spot. This time though, he isn't watching for you in the rear view mirror.

"Hey." You swing the door open and slide in. San gives you a small smile, followed by a:

"Hey." He watches as you dip forward to kiss him on the lips like you always do, and he surprisingly takes it. You were getting ready for the rejection or some kind of pull back; but, to San's own knowledge, he did it because he knew it'd be the last time he could savor it.

"You okay? Were you able to finish everything you needed to?"

"Uh, yeah. Think so." He says with a subtle chuckle before driving off.

"Are we going to your house?"

"Thought we could sit at the view and talk, if that's okay with you?" You slowly nod, keeping your eyes trained on San as he drives.

"Okay. You're scaring me, Sannie." He shakes his head.

"Please don't be."

"Then why couldn't we just talk about this like normal at your place?"

"Y/N, you trust me, right?" He quickly looks at you as he comes across a red light. You silently nod, just in time for him to drive off and continue onto the destination. "Okay, so trust me." He's still being so cryptic and distant that you don't even know how to respond. You quietly sit back in your chair and watch the surroundings pass you by, trying to settle the queasiness you feel building in your stomach.

These things never go well, and your case doesn't seem to be a one-off.

San continues to remain silent as he drives the rest of the way to the view, the music softly filling in as background noise that's enough to distract you. When he pulls into the small empty side lot and parks his car, he lets out a sigh and sits back.

"How was your day today?" He asks softly, still avoiding contact with you.

"It was okay, I guess. Better than yesterday."

"That's good."

"San." You adjust your position so you're looking directly at him, body facing him. "What is it that you wanted to talk about?"

"I don't know where to start."

"You have to start somewhere." He sighs again. "You know, whatever it is, you can tell me. We can figure this out together." You raise your hand to cup his cheek, almost somewhat of a gesture to force him to look at you. And for a minute, you feel him relax under your touch. You can tell he wants to turn and kiss the palm of your hand like he usually does, but he doesn't. "Sannie—"

"We should stop this." Your mouth slightly drops even though you don't know what to say. Your eyes widen, your touch turns cold. You retreat your hand while you let the response sink, San still keeping his gaze out of the window because he truly can't dare to look at you right now.

He'll fold.

He'll forget all about this and risk everything for the both of you.

He shouldn't.

"W-what?"

"We need to stop this, Y/N." He finally looks at you and his gaze feels like an icebox. Everything feels so cold and distant, even if it's supposed to be a front; it's working, and it's fucking you up completely.

"All of a sudden? I-I thought we were fine, what happened? What did I do wrong?" He shakes his head.

"Nothing. It's not anything you did, I'm just trying to be realistic here."

"Realistic? I thought you didn't care about the outside noise?"

"We're only prolonging the inevitable, don't you get it? Everything is going to come crashing down on us whether we like it or not. No matter how hard I try to stop it, this is what it'll eventually come to." You don't really understand where he's coming from or what he's getting at, but it's too late— you feel the tears steadily streaming down your cheeks.

Then, you're sobbing into your hands and you feel pathetic. But San feels terrible, he hates this. He doesn't wanna do this but he's conflicted between right and wrong, between being selfish and letting you go. "San, why?"

"Y/N, please hear me out on this, okay?" He's barely able to answer.

"Why? You ask him again. You cry in his passenger's seat, wiping it away with your sweater sleeves. "You said I could trust you, a-and that you wouldn't hurt me because you didn't care about anyone else."

"I need you to understand that I'm doing this because I care about you."

"But, I love you." San shakes his head as tears streak his own cheeks.

"We're being too selfish." He looks at you. "I am. I'm being too selfish and I don't need this to ruin things for you more. I need to put you first—"

"Why do you get to decide what that looks like for me, San?" He doesn't respond. "So, you don't want this?" He lets out a shaky sigh. "Us?"

"That's far from how I feel and you know it."

"Why can't you just say it back? Why can't we just let this be? I don't care—" You tug on his arm and he grips your hand before shaking his head.

"Because this is already hard as it is. Y/N, listen to me." He pleads, cupping your cheeks. He finally looks deep into your eyes, his thumb gently caressing the surface. The life in his eyes are gone. The glow, the stars. Now, his eyes are dull. They're holding back. They don't show you anything. "We should stop. We need to. Namjoon and the dean are discussing your future at the school, and I need you to keep going in this program. I need you to keep going forward even if that means I can't be right there with you every step of the way. You deserve to be here and you deserve to finish this until the very end. You've worked so hard to get here, and I refuse to let them lose out on you simply because of me."

"This makes no sense to me. Why do we have to do this? We can just be more careful and plan better. We can just—"

"I'm trying to protect you."

"Protect me? From Namjoon and the dean? Or are you trying to protect yourself?"

"I don't give a damn about me, Y/N!" He's a little angrier with this response but you know it isn't directed towards you. It's towards Namjoon. The dean. Yunho and Iseul. This whole fucked up situation. "I'm always gonna put you first. It's always been about you and it'll always be about you." You cry a bit harder at his answer, unsure of what to make of this entire thing. You don't know if San really means this or if he is just trying to protect you. You don't know what to do, you don't know if you should keep trusting him the same way.

You don't know if you can, and that's probably because you're blinded by all the overwhelming emotions you're feeling right now.

The both of you sit in this thick silence, your cries now filling the space while San tries to muster up the last bit of his energy to try and make you feel better— to get you to understand this better.

It's not that he wants to, he has to.

"I don't—" He swallows thickly. "I don't wanna do this but I have to. You have to understand." He says at a whisper, more tears streaming down his red-stained cheeks. "You have to understand, baby. Please." He begs. "I don't want them to do anything to you and I don't wanna jeopardize your future. Just listen to me. We have to do this." He leans forward to cup your cheeks and wipe your tears away with his thumb.

"No, we don't." You almost whine, but all San can do is shake his head and sit back in his seat.

"I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you, but I have to do what's best for you." His voice shakes. "I really am so sorry, sweetheart." He answers lowly, wiping his remaining tears before retreating back into his shell and showing off his cold demeanor for the remainder of his time with you. "I should get you back."

"I should've never trusted you. I should've known this was all too good to be true. You didn't care." You cry, repeating all this nonsense to try and get him to hurt the same way as you somehow. Because he'll never understand. Everything had led up to this and you were still unprepared for this. Even though you knew you'd be here at some point, nothing would have ever prepared you for the way your heart drops to your stomach; the way you feel nothing but thunder and rain.

Blue and grey.

He does, though.

In fact, he's probably hurting the most because he had to pull the trigger and let you go.

He hates it. He fucking hates it.

He's trying to drown out the rest until he gets you back to your building because he can't take it. He can't take hearing you cry anymore, he can't take hearing you say these awful things because you're angry at the moment. He hopes that you'll see where he's coming from eventually because all he's ever wanted to do was protect you and keep you safe.

All he's ever done was care about you, and you only.

All he's ever felt was love for you, and you only. You showed him what love was like again and he'll never take that for granted.

This was him showing you love. He needed to put you first.

"I care about you more than anything. I'm trying to do what's best—"

"Without involving me? Deciding for me? Yeah." You wipe away at your cheeks once more before unbuckling your seatbelt. "Whatever San, save it." You tell him before swinging the door open and stepping out. "You were just trying to protect me. I get it."

"Baby, don't be like that. Please don't make this harder than it already is. I would never intentionally hurt you. You know this." He tries to reach for your hand, but you move it away.

"You don't get to call me that anymore." You roll your eyes. "Anyway, goodluck, San." Is all you say before slamming his door shut and storming off. You begin to cry to yourself again, feeling sorry for yourself and stupid. You know deep down that San was only trying to do the right thing and that he was trying to protect you. But, right now, you're angry, you're sad, you're upset. You feel empty and betrayed and you just need to feel this out in order to let it pass.

This too shall pass.

When you head upstairs, you quickly pack up a few things, along with your laptop and other school-related necessities before locking up and heading to your car. You feel a migraine coming on, which definitely means you should take it easy and stay behind; but, all you can think about is getting to your mom and being away from school for a few days.

Nothing's better than a mother's love and comfort, even though you aren't entirely sure how she's gonna react to this, how she'll feel about San.

In the end, you don't hate him.

You can't.

You could never.

—FLASHBACK

"That was a good girl's date, wasn't it? We got massages, our nails done. Now we're eating a banana split under this nice weather." Your mom chuckles. "You need to come home more often."

"I know, I know." You scoop up a good helping of the banana split, internally conflicted on when is a good time to let your mom know about what's been going on. She would probably be surprised and scared for you, but your mom had a good way of choosing her words. She had a good way of being there for you but making her concerns known without pointing fingers or putting any blame on your actions.

"How has school been? Your friends?"

"They've been good. We've all been busy with our labs."

"Jiung's been good? You think you guys are all gonna stay in the labs you're currently rotating in?"

"He's good, yeah. And I think so, they all seem to be enjoying it."

"How about you?" You poke at the banana before scooping another helping. Your mom can already tell there's something else on your mind, but she's gonna let you take the floor and open up about it when you're ready.

Which is now.

You just don't know if she's ready.

"Uh, yeah. It's been good!" You give her a small smile. "I'm still deciding on my route, but it's been good." Pause. "There's actually something else I've been meaning to tell you."

"Okay, try me!" She chuckles. "What is it?"

"I've been seeing someone."

"Oh?" She laughs. "Well, isn't that great?! I mean, you never needed a man, okay. But, as long as they make you happy and add value to your life. I just want you happy." She laughs. "Who is he, where did you meet? Tell me everything!" You sigh and take a deep breath before starting.

"We met at school. In the lab. Because.. he's my rotation professor." You give her a look, afraid of what she'll say. She stops mid-bite and almost chokes, setting her spoon down before looking at you with knitted brows.

"Your.. what?! Y/N—"

"Mom, please. Just hear me out before you start assuming and saying things. He didn't abuse his power, I didn't throw myself on him, okay? It just happened." You immediately say and look at her with puppy eyes. "We just happened. We grew feelings for each other and just clicked really well. We've been keeping things lowkey."

"But, Y/N. Honey, I say this sincerely. What if people find out? Not that I want them to, but they will." You shrug.

"I don't know, we'll figure it out."

"H-how old is he?"

"32."

"Oh, okay. He's young."

"And handsome." You rest your chin on the palm of your hand and smile. "His name is San. Choi San. He's pretty popular in the bioengineering and neuroscience world."

"That's good." Your mom is slightly shutting down and you know it's because her thoughts are traveling at 100mph and she doesn't know what to think or do.

Or say.

"Mom, I'm sorry. I know you're worried but I'll be fine, okay? I promise. It'll all be fine." You add to break the silence and reach for her hand.

"I just don't want him to hurt you and then you lose everything you've worked so hard for over him."

"I just don't know where this is gonna take us. Things feel too overwhelming. Like.. I just don't want any talk getting into his head about us."

"It could really ruin things for the both of you, Y/N. Please be smart about your actions. Don't throw everything away because of him. That's all I ask. Just by the looks of it, I know he makes you happy and you're riding cloud nine, but you need to remember who comes first— yourself."

"I know. I hear you. I don't mean to cause any unnecessary worry or anything."

"No, you're not. Lovey, I'm your mom, I'm always gonna worry regardless. But, I trust you enough to make the right decisions and to take care of yourself. I know you'll be smart and I know you won't be completely reckless. I'm not gonna lie, this— this isn't a 'conventional' relationship and I'm not sure how I feel about it yet." She sighs and looks at you with a hint of concern in her eyes. "I'm trying hard to see this from your side, not from my side, and I think it'll take me time to get used to. In the end, I just don't want you to get hurt. I don't want people to think bad about you, and I don't want you to lose everything you've worked so hard for."

"I know, but it's all okay. I promise." You promise her, but you don't even know if you believe the promise yourself. "You can trust him." She doesn't say much, and you can tell she's trying her hardest to swallow her true emotions.

"Just becareful."

—END

San picks up the phone to call Namjoon, hands slightly trembling. He's still sitting in his car, still sitting in the same spot because it's his turn to cry and let out all his feelings. He hits the steering wheel before running a hand through his hair, second-guessing all his decisions.

Why did it have to come down to all of this? Did he really have to? How long before he folds and comes back to you?

Before he says fuck this all together and chases after you?

He keeps trying to remind himself that he needs to protect you and let this blow over. He keeps trying to remind himself that it'll all be worth it and you both will find your way back to each other again.

In time.

"San."

"It's over with." Is all he is able to say before Namjoon lets out a small sigh on the other end.

"I'm sorry, San. Look, just give this time—" Quite frankly, he doesn't wanna hear it anymore. Not today, not tomorrow, not for awhile.

"It's fine." He cute him off. "You don't have to say it. Just please make sure nothing happens to her."

"You got my word. I'll figure this out. Don't worry." San ends the call before he's digging his head into his hands and cries.

And cries.

Because now his days are going to blend back to the black and white filter he used to have on. He'll never experience that warmth, those colors, without you around.

He'll never witness where the sea meets the sky, when the sun sinks below the horizon. When dawn meets dusk.

His days will be monotone and dull, lifeless and cold. Gloomy. Days he had prayed to get past and never return to.

But, he's here again.

And somehow, this pain feels worse this time around than the first time.

—FLASHBACK

San sighs when he pulls up to his parents' house, aggressively shifting the gear to park before taking a moment to himself. He wasn't happy when his father left him a voicemail, scolding him for the rumors going around about him dating his student. He was quick to call him names and demand him to make things right before his name could be tainted in the industry. San isn't gonna lie, he's always looked up to his father. Things changed when San started making a name for himself in the academic industry, creating some kind of competitive tension between the two. Well, San never felt that way. His dad strongly did though, for whatever reason.

He never understood it. It's whatever.

What San wasn't having was the fact that his father kept calling you a little girl who only wanted to use him to work her way in and up.

He slams the door to his car, adjusting his hat and his jacket before tapping the code into the keypad on the front door.

"San, is that you?" He hears his mom's sweet voice call out to him. He smiles softly when she comes into view in the hallway, opening her arms for a hug. "Please don't mind your father, you know how he is. He's just concerned." She gives the back of his neck a reassuring massage.

"Mm, yeah. I can feel the concern especially when he starts calling me out my name."

"San." His mom gives him a look before his dad looks up from the paper he's reading on the couch, forehead crinkling when he sees his son walk in.

"Why are you here?"

"Hi to you, too." San says while his mom steps in the middle.

"Honey." She turns to his father.

"So, what was up with that voicemail?"

"Why don't you tell us what's been going on with you and your so-called girlfriend? Do you even care about yourself or what this could do to your career? You're so careless—"

"So what if I'm careless! You don't even know her so you don't have a right to do that!"

"Are you actually that stupid, San? Do you know how damaging this could be for you, for us?"

"What does this have to do with you?!" San's voice raises.

"It has everything to do with us! Everyone thinks you either forced that girl into a relationship or she threw herself on you and you stupidly took the bait!"

"Even if I said it wasn't like that, you wouldn't listen anyway!"

"Are you serious about her?"

"What makes you think I'm not? We're two grown adults who are capable of making our own decisions and knew the consequences from the very beginning."

"And you think she'll stay? Someone that young and who is just getting started with her life, basically. You think she'll stay and be there for you when times get rough?"

"Absolutely." His dad scoffs.

"Is that so? Wishful thinking. You couldn't even keep Iseul and now you're downgrading to a st—"

"Hey!" San's mom cuts off his father's statement. "That is enough from you. Don't finish that sentence."

"You have no idea what Iseul put me through!" San's tone is louder to match his father's energy. "I found somebody who genuinely and truly cares about me and who I am. That isn't enough for you? Just because she's a student, but a grown adult at that?! You can't even be happy for a second? You still find a way to be on Iseul's side even though she cheated with my bestfriend!"

"Maybe it's time you realized you pushed Iseul away. That was your own doing. And this girl? Don't come to me and make me tell you 'I told you so' when she leaves after she's gotten everything she needs from you." San's dad is fuming in front of him. "How could you be so sure things will be smooth sailing with her, hm? What makes you think this can work?"

"This is fucking bullshit, I'm not explaining myself to you. If you don't wanna be happy for me and support me, then so be it."

—END

San thinks maybe his dad was right; maybe this wasn't meant to be, and was just supposed to be another fleeting moment, another lesson.

Even though deep down, he knows it's far from it.

As he sits in his home office, he scrolls through old pictures of you and him together— you, pictures you've sent him. He feels the rush of sadness hit him like bricks, his chest almost physically hurting from the ache. He has this sudden urge to text you and call you, tell you how much he misses you.

But, he stops himself.

What if you stopped caring? What if you were so mad at him that you hated him?

He couldn't bear with it.

If only he knew how much you cried and yearned for him every night, if only he knew how much your head hurt while you laid on your mom's lap while she ran her hands through your hair— gently cooing you and shushing you to help you get some sleep.

If only he knew.

"Mom, I'm sorry." You cry and cry, laying your head on her lap as you let everything out. "You were right, I messed everything up. This was all so stupid. I'm so stupid."

"Don't say that." She shushes you and tries to coo you. "Don't ever say that again." She looks at you. "What happened?" You gather the strength to tell her everything that's been going on. How deep your relationship went with San and how well he took care of you. How you weren't always the most careful but the only reason why things blew up was because of Hae-jin, Iseul and Yunho. How Iseul and Yunho just keep trying to get in between, how Jiung even went to Professor Kim about all of this.

How San broke this off claiming he wanted to protect you and put you first.

How utterly sad and betrayed you feel.

"I'm just so tired of feeling this way. I hate how alone I feel. I hate how much I miss him. I hate how this unfolded the way it did."

"I'm so sorry, honey. You need to let things be for now, okay? I know that's not what you wanna hear, but you need to. Especially for school and yourself."

"Why does anyone care? Why does it matter?"

"People have nothing better to do, and I'm sorry it had to be those two and Jiung."

"I'm so tired, mom. When will this pass? What did I do wrong? Why did he leave so quickly?"

"Lovey. You did nothing wrong. It wasn't you at all, and it wasn't San either. The circumstances are just tough. You didn't know it would play out this way and I'm sure he has his reasons."

"What if he's just using that as an excuse? What if he really doesn't want this anymore?"

"If he really cared about you, why would he lie, Y/N? I'm sure he was doing his best to protect you both, especially you. I know it hurts right now, hun. But, maybe this is for the best." You don't wanna hear it even though your mom might be right.

Maybe this is for the best. Maybe this was just telling you this could never work between you two.

No matter how hard you both tried.

San's urge to text or call doesn't lessen as the next few days go by, especially when he notices he hasn't seen any trace of you. He'll usually see you walking towards the biology building for Yunho's class or making your way to the dining hall with the girls.

If San hadn't overheard Sunwoo telling his lab mates that you were sick, he would've gone crazy.

It still doesn't help that you're feeling unwell and he can't do anything about it.

"Sunwoo." San pokes his head out of his door, causing Sunwoo to lift his head from his laptop and shift his attention towards him. "Can you meet really quickly?"

"Yeah, sure thing. Be right over!"

"Thanks." San heads back to his desk and lets out a breath, waiting for Sunwoo to come. It takes him less than 5 minutes to finally make his way into the office, rubbing his hands down his jeans. "Hey." San looks up at him. "Thanks for coming in on short notice."

"No prob! What's up, Professor Choi?"

"I wanted to talk to you really quickly because I wanted you to hear it from me directly. Starting next week, we'll be losing Y/N's support. She'll be heading to Professor Kim's lab."

"O-oh. Okay. Damn." Sunwoo ticks his head to the side. "Professor Kim with the steal." San chuckles a bit.

"Yeah." San can't even hide his sadness when he looks down at the papers beneath his hands that Sunwoo catches on and he feels bad. He still doesn't know the details and he never will, but if it's one thing he can gather right now, it's the fact that the room feels cold and empty.

It's the fact that San literally has to force himself to smile and deliver this news like all is okay and no big deal— when in fact, it fucking is.

Sunwoo feels so bad.

"So, I know she's out sick right now, but will I still get to see her before she goes? I wanna talk to her to wrap things up, too."

"When she returns, we'll make sure she has time to close loose ends with you and gather her things."

"Hm." Sunwoo nods slowly. "Okay."

"I'm sorry this came up so suddenly, but I had to make a few changes around here. We all thought she'd be a better fit with Professor Kim."

"I see. She's super smart and incredibly great at what she does, I know she'll do well in whatever she does and wherever she goes." San nods.

"Yeah, she will." He sighs. "There's another rotation student that I might bring in next quarter that might be a good fit to work with you, too. His name is Baehyuk."

"Cool. Down to meet whenever the time is right."

"Thanks, Sunwoo."

"No, thank you for always giving me some help and pushing me forward." San gives him a small smile. "Everything will work out."

"Yeah." Is all he could say in response. Because he hopes it will.

Right now, it seems like a far reach.

All San wants to do is love you, rather than hiding just how deeply in love he was with you.

—FLASHBACK

"Here, baby." He turns to hand you a plate with a smile on his face. "Think you can help me dry the last of these dishes and put 'em up?"

"Course, chef." He chuckles, watching as you tip-toe with nothing but his shirt on to reach over and place the dry dishes into the proper cabinet. You follow suit with the last three dishes, setting the towel aside while San wipes away the water droplets around the sink. "We did it, babe! All clean."

"Sure did." He laughs, caging you in against the counter to kiss you sweetly. "Thank you, baby."

"You're welcome." You giggle. "Thank you for making dinner."

"As long as you enjoyed." You nod.

"What do you wanna do for the rest of the evening?"

"Mm, we can watch a movie and fall asleep here on the couch without any worry."

"That's fun." You smile.

"Or, we can do other things that I have in mind." He brushes the hair away from your face while you wrap your arms around his neck.

"Ooh." You reply in a sing-song tone. "Care to indulge?"

"Absolutely." He says just as he swiftly carries you and wraps your legs around him. You squeal as he walks over to the couch and gently plops you down onto the soft cushions, wasting no time to attach his lips to every inch of skin he can. He slowly hovers over you, hands roaming up your shirt and tugging material along with it as he continues to move upward— exposing your cute pink panties from beneath. He sinks to his knees and pries your legs open after fixing your position to the edge of the couch. "Let me make you feel good, love."

"Yes please, Sannie. Please." You beg, watching as San slides down your panties and tosses them aside. His hands caress your thighs, giving them a good squeeze while laying open-mouth kisses along the surface. You continue to watch him, biting on your lip when he hovers over where you need him at most. He licks a stripe up your folds, causing your head to cock back against the cushion. He begins to gently kiss and suck at your heat— a satisfying, breathy moan leaving your lips as you let San relish being in between your thighs. He laps away at your clit, tonguing down your pussy as if he had been deprived of you for years.

You love/hate how good he is at this. "Babe—" You moan loudly, hips now working on their own terms against his mouth. He subtly nods as he continues to suck and lap away at your heat, tongue keeping you wet and filthy; just the way he likes it. "God, right there—" You whine, hips rolling upward and grinding against his mouth, his tongue.

You used to be so shy.

Now, you're not afraid to tell him what you want and he fucking loves it. "Oh—San— gonna—" Your statement comes out broken as you continue to work against his mouth, orgasm crashing down like a harsh wave against the shore. You grip his hair, body twitching as San continues to latch on and groan against your pussy; incredibly hard while watching the way your body surrenders all. "Fuck." You whisper, still twitching due to the aftershocks from your first orgasm of the night.

"That's my girl." He's back to kissing your thighs, hands gently rubbing up and down your leg as a way to soothe you.

"Need you." You tug him by the shirt to plant a messy kiss against his lips— shirt soon to be discarded on the floor, along with his sweats.

Now you're on his lap, slowly riding his cock just the way he likes it— the couch's throw blanket resting against the small of your back and draped along San's lap.

It's his favorite position after all.

"Mm— just like that, baby." He whispers against your lips as you continue to ride him slowly on the couch. "Just like that." He repeats. "You're my good girl, right? Just mine?" He asks lowly and you nod, letting out a sweet moan as he pinches your nipple and watches your head tilt back in pleasure. "Oh, fuck— just like that." His head rests back against the couch, feeling your walls brush against him and drag against his rock hard cock. "All mine."

"Mm'fuck, Sannie." You keep your head back, intense pleasure bubbling at the pit of your stomach. You take him slowly, deeply; his cock hitting all the right spots every time you do a 'lil tug and pull— hips carefully rolling against him.

"So fucking sexy." He groans. "God, you're everything." His lips drag against your skin, tongue swirling around your perky nipples as your hands tug on the ends of his soft, black hair. "Everything to me." He whispers as if your skin could hold all of the universe's secrets. The blanket is barely keeping up with your movements. San's hand comes up along the base of your neck, bringing you back down to envelope your lips with his.

The kiss is full of hunger.

The kiss is slow and steady.

The kiss is messy.

You break the kiss first, body slowly crumbling in his grip when you feel your high approaching quick. You moan loudly, breath ragged as you pant; hips slightly picking up the pace to push yourself further and further until you reach the edge.

"Oh—" San matches your moans. "That's it, sweetheart. Cum for me." He praises you, voice deep— tone sending vibrations all the way down to your core. "Give it to me. Wanna feel you cum all over this dick, angel." Hearing San talk the way he's talking is enough to make your coil snap. He continues to coo you as you come undone on his lap; stuttering in your movements and trembling in his grip. He places his hands on your hips, fingers digging deep into the flesh while he fucks up into you— reaching his high shortly after you with a loud groan and hiss. "Fuck, that was so good, baby." You giggle, forehead against his while his hands gently caress and your back. You leave a tender kiss against his plump lips, and he chases with a few repeated kisses before bringing you down with him on the couch. The both of you lay underneath the throw blanket, now properly covering most of your bodies while San holds you from behind. He has his propped up by an arm while you both watch the show on TV, but San finds his thoughts wandering elsewhere at some point. He begins to look around the house and notices how different it feels since you've been around.

Good different.

A space that used to he so grey, so lifeless; now has remnants of you everywhere.

Your polaroids.

Pictures of you and San in frames.

Your little stuffed animal keychains and rings thrown onto the kitchen island, or the room. Or even his desk in the office.

Your little post-it notes. Your favorite chips and snacks littered around the pantry.

You were there everywhere he turned, and he finds it's one of his biggest blessings.

Especially when you lay here on the couch with him, completely not minding the idea San proposed of just falling asleep on the couch together while sorting through movies.

You agreed so quickly and so happily.

No matter how big or small, most ideas just seemed silly in his last relationship.

But, now he has you— someone who is happy to just be with him and spend time with him. No matter how big or small the idea, the plans.

San loves you.

And he'll never take it for granted.

—END

—read 13.5 here

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darknight3904 · 1 day ago

Text

All Too Well

Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Summary: Your tension with Joel comes to a head as you make a confession that will change your relationship with him forever.

Warnings: Smut 18+ Langauge, oral (F receiving) , one thigh slap, p in v, Joel being super into boobs

Word Count: 3.5k

Previous Part / Series Masterlist / Main Masterlist

July 2024

Joel stands a mere five feet from you. His chest heaves a bit, like he's dashed out of the bar to catch you. His hands rest on his hips as he leans on one leg.

"Didn't anyone ever tell you it's rude to leave a man on the dance floor?"

You look down at the grass and rock back and forth on the balls of your feet.

"Sorry." You say earnestly, "Just needed some air."

Joel shakes his head, "It's alright, sweetheart, Y'just scared me it's all. Thought you might've been getting sick or something."

You shake your head. No, you're not sick. He's considerate to ask though. Ellie had a nasty stomach bug a week and a half ago, you had become her in-home nurse and spoon-fed her thin chicken broth until she could eat solids again.

"You gonna tell me what's wrong then?" Joel asks

You curse him. He always seems to know when something is off with you. Even here in the low light of the streetlights in Jackson, he could see you were thinking.

Yeah, thinking about him.

"It's nothing." You brush him off, "I think I'll just go back home and take a shower. You should go back to the party, though, I bet Tommy misses you."

Joel catches you by the elbow as you go to turn away from him again.

"Now, hold on. It's clear I've upset you, tell me what's wrong." He prods, "Lay it on me, I can handle it."

You scoff. Yeah right. He couldn't handle it in 2003, what made him think he'd be able to accept it now.

"Just let me go." You huff, pulling at your arm

"No, Not 'til you tell me what's wrong." Joel's grip tightens, not enough to bruise, but firm enough so you feel his fingers leaving indents in your skin.

You struggle again for a moment before relenting. Fine, if he wanted to know, he was going to know. No sense in hiding it until one of you dies or gets munched on by a Clicker.

"It's you, Joel." You say

"Me?" He asks, dropping your arm, confusion taking over his stupidly handsome face.

"You're the fucking problem." You point your finger into his chest for good measure, "Giving me all these nicknames and letting me sleep in your bed. You're under my fucking skin and I can't get over you."

Joel is looking at you like you've lost it. Good, maybe if he thinks you're crazy, he'll leave you alone, and you can get over him.

"You don't like it when I do those things for you? Want me to stop, cuz I will." Joel says, his anger beginning to rise to meet yours.

You groan, deep down, you really don't know what you want. Maybe you do. God, it was all so fucked up, falling for him again, you were losing it.

"No! I just...I don't..." You huff, wrapping your arms around your body, "I can't keep going like this. Pretending like it's all platonic because it's not."

Here goes nothing, no taking this one back.

"I'm in love with you, Joel. I'm fucking obsessed with you, and your nicknames, teasing, and constant worry over me aren't helping."

Joel is quiet as he takes it all in, you can practically see the gears turning in his head. You squeeze your arms around your body, digging your fingers into your arms til it burns.

"I-I know you dumped me for a reason, I get it, I do." You stammer, "I can get over my feelings again, I'll do it again, I swear..."

Joel finally finds his voice as he gives you a one-word reply, "No."

You ignore him and continue your warpath, "Look, let's just pretend I never said any of this, okay. I'll move back to my house and we can keep being friends."

Your voice practically dies in your throat as you add, "Please, just don't...leave me again."

"I'm not goin' anywhere." Joel sighs deeply and takes a step forward. His natural scent invades your nose as he takes your face in his hands.

"You're crazy, y'know that, girl."

"If you're gonna ridicule me, you can let go and do it further away." You huff in annoyance. You'd just laid your soul bare for this man, and the first thing he does is call you crazy. The audacity he had.

"Now, let me finish." He says sternly

"You can't take your confession back," A small smile plays on his lips. "Because I am just as fucking obsessed with you, baby."

You scoff, yeah, right, he was fucking with you. Joel's thumb runs a soothing path across your cheek,

"I'm not lying, scouts honor." He says

"You weren't even a boy scout." You remind him. thinking back to what you knew about Joel's childhood.

"Hmph, you're right about that one," Joel gives you a coy smile, "Guess I'll just have to show ya then,"

His voice drops a bit and you swear your heart skips a beat,

"Let me show how fucking in love with you I am, baby..."

Before you have a chance to blink, his lips are brushing yours. Your eyes flutter shut, and you tilt your head a bit to deepen the kiss. Joel lets out a deep groan when your hands come up to brush through the hair at the back of his neck.

Joel pulls back to rest his forehead against yours, "Still think I'm lyin' to ya?"

A giggle escapes your lips as you shake your head, and he steals another kiss from you.

"I was in love with you again the moment I saw ya shoveling horse shit when I first got here." He confesses, "Couldn't believe you were still alive."

You snort and pull back from him to look him in the eye, "Cuz the overalls and rubber boots I wore are so attractive. Besides, if you were so into me again, why'd you say you didn't know me to Ellie?"

Joel's eyes soften as he takes in your determined look, you want the truth, not some half-assed excuse.

"I dunno," Joel mumbles, his eyes dropping down to the neckline of your dress.

You scoff as he looks away, here he is not owning up to anything.

"Are you fucking kidding me, Joel? You're a fuckin-"

"I'm sorry." He blurts out, "For all of it. I'm sorry for dumpin' ya before the world ended, I was a real dick, baby. Mailing your shit back like that. I shouldn't have done that."

You hum, in acknowledgment, looking up into his deep brown eyes.

Joel leans in and presses a kiss to your forehead, "Shouldn't have said I didn't know ya to Ellie when we got here either, don't know what I was thinking."

"I get it, if ya change your mind. I'll let you go, just say the word and I'll let you go, I swear. You deserve better than I can offer anyway, I had my chance and blew it already."

You shake your head, no you don't want that.

"What part of I'm fucking obsessed with you, don't you get?" You breathily ask, pressing a gentle kiss to his lips.

Joel smiles, basking in your forgiveness. Here you were, finally standing in front of him, your feelings laid bare to each other. It's a small step, just letting your fears of the past go yet you feel infinitely lighter now, wrapped up in him.

Your hands fiddle with the buttons on his shirt and curl into the soft fabric. You suddenly feel unbearably hot but you get it now, why love drove so many people mad. Joel's soft gaze on you had your chest buzzing with and excitement you couldn't quite name.

"You wanna go back to your house?" You ask hopefully

"You mean our house?"

"Right, our house." You softly correct yourself

Joel gives you a nod and a smile, Course I do, darlin' lead the way."

You and Joel nearly faceplant three times as the two of you fumble your way up the steps to your shared bedroom. Joel catches you after you stumble over a pair of his discarded jeans from earlier.

"I'll clean that up," Joel says apologetically, kicking them to the side.

"Later." You breathe as his lips tickle the soft skin on your neck

"Later." He parrots with a smile into your skin

You let yourself fall onto the bed, welcoming it's softness and the way it smells of Joel. Before you can miss him, he's hovering over you, stealing kisses from your lips and letting his hands begin to wander across your form.

"Fuck..." Joel sighs as his hands squeeze at your chest.

"You alright up there?" You tease, he sounds so utterly wrecked and you've barely begun.

Joel gives you a playful glare, "You don't fucking know how long I've been waiting to feel these, baby. Been thinking about it since we went to that Macy's."

"My bra shopping got you going, huh?" You tease

Joel grumbles in annoyance and presses a kiss to the skin of your collarbone,

"You're real mean, y'know that."

"You poor baby," You laugh, throwing his nickname back at him, "You'll be alright."

You want to tease him some more, he's so easy to make fun of like this. Your words die in your throat when Joel presses his knee against your core through your dress.

"Not laughing anymore," Joel notes as he fixes his attention on your neck, his hands pulling your cardigan off your body.

Your hands undo the buttons of the shirt he's been teasing you with all night, and you push it off his broad shoulders. Finally, at long last, his torso is all yours to admire.

"Quit staring." Joel orders, "Nothin' there to admire."

"I beg to differ." You smile

Joel scoffs as he leans down to let his lips capture yours as hands roam up your back, searching for the zipper to your dress. Your resolve loosens as your hands curl against the soft skin of his chest, fuck you were really going to do this.

The loud hiss of your still zipped dress as you break the kiss, your eyes begin to swim with fear. That's right, sex with Joel also meant being naked with Joel.

"You want me to stop?" Joel asks, freezing

"No, I don't." You honestly say, "I just..."

"Take your time," Joel says, pressing a chaste kiss to your lips, and then to your cheek

Your breaths come out shaky as you speak again, "Just scared you won't like what you see. I don't look like I used to."

"Are you fucking with me?" Joel laughs

"No." You groan, thinking of how your scars ruined your skin, and how age had filled your curves out.

"Baby, you could be neon green under this dress, and I wouldn't care." He presses a kiss to your cheek, "l love your scars, I promise."

Your face warms in embarrassment, how did he say stuff like that so easily, "You haven't even seen them yet."

"Don't gotta," Joel promises, "They're a part of you, I know I'll love them."

It isn't much just a simple sentence, but that's all it takes for fear to be banished from your mind as you smile up at him.

"Take my dress off, Joel." You say

"Yes, ma'am." Joel teases as his fingers find the zipper once more.

Joel pulled your dress from you, delighting to see that you'd forgone a bra with said dress. His hands ran over the raised pink lines and gently caressed your hips and soft belly.

"Even prettier than the last time I saw ya." He assures

Your clothes disappeared onto the floor as Joel disappeared from above you, only to reappear between your thighs, kneeling in front of you. One big hand snuck between your legs as he teased you through your panties. His fucking mouth locked onto the skin of your thighs whispering dirty things into the skin there.

Bold as ever, he slipped his hand under your panties and let his thumb brush over your sensitive clit while two fingers slipped lower and teased your hole.

"Fucking soaked." Joel comments as you blush, "Can I take these off?"

You nod, eager to get out of the suffocating underwear.

Without the restriction of clothing, he was able to latch his mouth to your needy clit. His fingers teased your slit as he ran them along the soft flesh there, teasing but never entering.

"Joel..." You gasp, your hand wrapping around his wrist, unsure if you want him to stop or keep going.

"All mine." He whispers as you cry out, your orgasm washing over you quicker than you expected, your hips nearly flying off the bed. It'd been so long since you felt pleasure like this.

Joel straightens up and rejoins you on the bed, lying beside you as he runs a hand across the scars on your belly, murmuring something about them being beautiful.

"Can we keep going?" You ask breathlessly, looking over at his handsome face

"Course we can." He smiles, sitting back up

You hum in delight as his hips lift and he pulls his pants off, finally exposing the rest of his body to your greedy eyes. The softness of it all, god you fucking loved him.

Joel shook his head a bit as you pulled his boxers down, letting his cock out, "Greedy."

"Can you blame me?" You giggle

The hiss he let out when you ran your fingertips along the head had you dizzy with lust. Joel repositions so he's above you and his lips ghost over your nipples, teasing them with his tongue as he lifts you up so he's notched at your entrance.

"Wait." You say as he pauses above you

"What's wrong?" Joel asks, concerned, his eyes never leave yours

"I just, um," God, this was embarrassing, but he had a right to know, "Dr. Hill did an exam on me a few years back. Said I have a lot of scar tissue inside, so don't be upset if I can't y'know...cum."

"We'll go slow, alright. If it hurts or something is off, you tell me and I stop, okay?" His voice laced with concern

You nod and grip at his forearms, grounding yourself to him.

"Words, baby. Let me hear 'em," Joel says softly, refusing to move without your permission

"I wanna keep going." You say honestly

A gasp escapes your lips when he enters you. He was big, you knew it, you had seen it just seconds ago, yet it still surprised you as he pushed forward, just barely inside

"Fuck..." Joel gasped above you, his hands gripping the pillows beside you

You grimace when he shifts again, pushing more of him into you. Fuck, the doc told you this would hurt, but this bad?

"Need me to stop?" Joel asks worriedly when he sees your face

That's the last fucking thing you want.

"Keep going." You say, determined to see this through.

Joel looks at you, concerned yet he inches forward, letting out ba soft groan under his breath.

Slowly but surely you get there, letting him inside as pain slowly becomes pleasure. His fingers toy with your clit as you squirm under him. What he does next though, it has you nearly passing out from how hot it is. Joel fucking Miller leans down just a bit and actually spits on his cock.

"You're insane." You comment

"You love it," Joel says, stealing your lips in a kiss that's nothing but spit and teeth.

Joel begins to move, soft and slow at first before you demand more from him. You moan as you feel yourself growing even wetter, between his spit and your own arousal, it's actually begun to feel really fucking good.

Joel's hips slam into yours as he finally gives in to your begging for faster and harder.

"This what you want, huh? Is it?" He asks, leaning down to your ear, pressing your thighs up towards your chest a bit.

"Yes!" You yelp when his hand smacks at your inner thigh

"Such a good fucking girl..." Joel mutters as his hips begin to stutter when you tighten around him

"Joel!" You warn, fuck your stomach feels tight, no way is he actually going to get you to cum.

His hips backward, and your jaw drops into a silent moan as he enters again, this time with his thumb teasing your clit.

"C'mon, let go." Joel coerces, "Know you wanna."

You groaned as your orgasm rolled over you, your eyes slammed shut as Joel sucked a hickey onto your chest.

"Fucking hell!" He gasped, freeing himself from you before cumming all over your tummy.

Joel presses a kiss to your damp forehead before dropping himself onto the mattress beside you. Your heart squeezes when he scooches towards you, resting his sweaty head in the valley between your breasts.

"You okay?" You ask softly

"Am I okay?" Joel laughs into your skin, "Are you okay?"

"I'm okay." You smile, running a hand through his greying curls atop his head.

Joel lets out a soft hum and presses a kiss to one of your nipples,

"Hungry? Thirsty? Sore?" He asks, apparently ready to provide a world of aftercare despite looking exhausted himself

You wiggle your hips a bit, testing the waters. A twinge of pain shoots through your belly, and you grimace. It had felt so good, yet your body was punishing you anyway.

"Sore." You softly admit, kissing his head, "And kinda sticky."

You motion to the cum that is drying on your body

Joel shifts so he can get a better look at you, examining the way your face is pinched together as your thighs shift again before looking down at your dirty skin.

"I'll run us a bath. " He offers, "Get us some food while I'm at it too."

You nod as he disappears, naked as the day he was born, to run you a bath and get food.

You snort when he returns, clad in your bathrobe you had hung up in the bathroom on your hook, he wipes at your stomach with a warm wash cloth.

"I look good, no?" He asks gesturing to his body

"It's up for debate." You laugh

Joel scoops you up, bridal style, and walks towards the bathroom, "Well, I happen to think I look fabulous."

The bath is perfectly warm, even smelling like the lavender bath fizzes you keep for special occasions. Joel lowers you into the tub before turning to sit on the closed toilet, a plate with crackers and cheese balanced in his hands

"Get your ass in here." You say before he has a chance to sit down fully

"You sure?" Joel asks

"You just fucked me for the first time in two decades and now you're asking to take a bath with me?" You say

Joel sets the food on the edge of the rub, unties the robe, and climbs in. He fidgets nervously as you lean back into his chest.

"You nervous, Miller?" You ask, feeling the way his breath stutters a bit.

"We've never done this before." He points out, "Not even back then."

You hum in acknowledgment, "Lucky you, I guess."

Joel laughs a bit as he links his arms securely around your middle, hands brushing the underside of your breasts, "Lucky me, indeed."

"Would you leave them alone?" You laugh as he squeezes the flesh

"Can't. " Joel mumbles, pressing a soft kiss on your neck, "I missed them."

"Pervert." You say softly

You and Joel sit in the bath til it goes tepid, feeding each other crackers and cheese, and basking in each other's company. Then, he coaxes you to your feet and washes both of you under the steam of the shower.

Now, you were wrapped around him in bed, listening to the crickets chirp. Your eyes are beginning to droop when he speaks,

"I'm sorry," Joel says

"I'm not hurting that much, Joel." You say sleepily into his bare chest.

"No not that. Well, yes that. But I'm sorry for dumpin' ya before the world ended."

You hum, "Mmm. It's alright, I forgive you, remember?

"I know, I just..."

"I forgive you." You softly say, scooting closer to him

Joel presses a kiss to your forehead, "You're too good to me. I'm an ass, I know that."

Joel yelps when you pinch his side.

"Glad you're self-aware." You laugh

"I got real scared back then. Thought I was fucking your life up by sticking around." He admits

"Right, cuz dating a 35-year-old at 24 was the worst thing to ever happen to me" You joke

"No!" Joel protests, "You know what I mean."

You nod, you do know what he means.

"Don't have to be scared anymore." You say quietly

Joel hums and chuckles a bit, rubbing a soothing circle into your back as you lay here with him under the covers.

"No, I don't. You're all mine." He declares

You shift a bit, shuffling so you can look him in the eyes, and press a kiss to his lips. Your voice comes out confidently, as you say something you've wanted to say for so long now,

"Yours."

Here we are...at the end. Hope you all enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it. I am very busy right now, but I may write more for these two later.

Thank you all for reading and following this story as it progressed. If you'd like, leave me some comments with feedback!

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#joel miller #the last of us #tlou #ellie williams #joel miller x reader #joel miller fluff #joel the last of us #tlou fanfiction #fanfic #joel tlou #joel miller x you #joel miller angst #pedro pascal #maria miller #joel miller smut

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queermasculine · 3 days ago

Note

you don't have to answer this but are you still on t? I know you've talked about thinking you were into guys before figuring out u were into butches and I wonder if that realization changed how you saw your body?

I ask bc I'm in a spot where I can't fully tell if I need to go on t to look the way I'd feel right or if I can get to enough of a butch level with exercise and clothing and being around better people than currently. My gender wouldn't change either way, I'm still not a woman, but .. yeah.

realizing i was into other butches did change how i saw my body absolutely, like completely changed it, i don't think i had anything positive to say about my body pre-butch4butch at all tbh. looking at myself and realizing my masculine dream partner would actually have most of the features i was most dysphoric about was a total shift in perspective for me

whether that type of mental shift can lessen your dysphoria to a point where you'll never need T as a dysphoric butch, i'm still kinda figuring that out myself. i was in that "i've done my research and i've seen friends go through the process but i'm being a pussy" stage when i had my b4b epiphany and that brought my dysphoria down to manageable levels (this was years ago now) so i never went on T, but i still think T might be in my future – even if i've cut down my dysphoria by like 70% that remaining 30% can really chafe sometimes depending on the day

but if the question is "is it possible to get to a good place just by focusing on all the other, non-medical aspects of transition" yeah absolutely. like you really can change your appearance completely it's kinda crazy. many ppl don't realize just how much of the average cis guy's masculinity – which can seem so inherent – is actually just clothes and hair. even just getting your hair cut by someone who will give you an actual men's cut instead of the girl version of that style can totally change how you look because it just frames your face and neck so differently (speaking from experience)

that being said i don't think you should ever withhold HRT from yourself if you have access to it and think it might help you. just that it's possible to have a good life even if that's not an option for you, at least in my case it has very much been possible

edit: love all the ppl chiming in with their positive experiences being on T, however i was kind of trying to make this a positivity post for the transmascs out there who are not on hormones rn (like me) so if we could refrain from using wording that paints that life as being incomplete or lesser-than somehow that'd be great, thanks everybody🤘

#also anybody reblogging this with anti-hrt sentiment will be boiled just fyi #anyway good luck bro #mail

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marbofmoorock · 1 day ago

Text

Gotta love the day after Valentine's Day. Jax strikes me as the type of guy to buy up a bunch of seasonal candy when it's cheap and on clearance the day after.

He presents a few to Ragatha:

"Ey Dollface, don't you know life is, eh, like a box of Chocolates?"

"Oh, weeeell, ehehe, Becaaause you don't know what you're gonna ge-"

(Splat)

"NOPE. Life just kinda has a way of testing people, like right now, Raggy."

Ragatha Sits completely stunned as the partially melted chocolates slide down amd cover her face, she already had kind of a bad day, and just when she thought it couldn't get any worse, Jax throws melted Chocolate in her face, she tears up.

"(Sobs)...Y-yeah...I guess..."

Jax notices Ragatha's more sad response, usually expecting her to be upset, after all that had gone on today. But Ragatha was clearly done with today, tearing up as she felt like everything was just falling apart around her, no matter how much she had helped.

Jax feels a pang of guilt, something he hadn't felt in a long time, despite often antagonizing others for fun.

"I... Look, I'm sorry, Rags...I...Didn't know you'd take it so hard uhh-"

Jax pauses, seeing how Ragatha is still covered in chocolate, it's all over her face and her dress, she sat down on a nearby block, and buried her face in her mitt hands.

Jax starts to realize that he's really messed up, feeling anxious and upset, hoping to fix what he had done, a gentler and more considerate side of Jax coming out as he finds a nearby box of wipes, and walks up to Ragatha.

At first, she winces at Jax as she seemed next to broken at this point, unable to handle another joke or anything mean. She lifts her head and her eyes meet Jax's out of fear and confusion as she guards her face with her hands.

"Stop..." She said weakly, thinking Jax was going to hurt her again.

Jax saw the hurt in Ragatha's eyes, and felt awful.

"Hold still Rags, I'm gonna fix this."

"Fix...-wh-huh?"

Jax places a wet wipe on Ragatha's chocolate covered face, wiping clean the section of her face the wipe is on.

Ragatha, fearful of Jax at first, started to see that this wasn't a prank, motionless to see what would happen next, as Jax was acting so out of character, she thought.

Jax continued to wipe Ragatha's face, hair, and was even able to clean off most of the stains on her dress since they were fresh. Ragatha starred in silence, confused and surprised at what was going on.

"Jaxxy..." Ragatha whispered under her breath, still flabbergasted.

Jax looked at Ragatha as he threw the used wipes away and looked at Ragatha. Ragatha returned her gaze, curious as to what is even going on.

"Jax, I...I have no words. You pulled a real dirty prank on me, yet...you clean up the mess and take care of me."

Jax looks down in silence, feeling stupid, unable to look Ragatha in the eye, until Ragatha holds Jax's cheek, gently leaning his chin in her direction.

"Jax...what's going on?" She said

"Look, I've hurt you. I can see that. I've hurt everyone, and I thought it was all a game, until now...I must hurt you the most, don't I? I've not been kind to you."

"You do pull too many harmful pranks. But I still like you just fine."

Jax Smiles; "Okay Dollface, harmless pranks are fine with you? Good, I'd miss those, but I'll lay off the meanie ones."

"Thank you Jaxxy...I like when you surprise me." says Ragatha as she holds Jax close, Jax blushes a little as Ragatha closes her eyes and snuggles closer to Jax as her arms are wrapped around his waist.

Jax sees and feels Ragatha's strong affections, returning them by giving Ragatha more of his own, Hugging Ragatha close in a intimate and sweet way, being more of a snuggly bunny instead of a real raspy rash of a rabbit he usually was before.

Jax felt the need to shelf his harmful pranks and be more of a team player, so he declares this to Ragatha.

"I'm sorry, Raggy, I'm sorry for everything. I'll make it up to you guys, we'll be a team. I'll help build trust with everyone again, we'll make it out one day, and I won't leave any of you behind."

"Aw, Jaxxy, I forgive you, and I love you. Just don't let go Jaxxy, I don't know if i could handle being this low alone again."

"I promise Raggy, to be there for you, and for everyone."

...

After Ragatha and Jax bond and settle their differences, Jax goes around to Apologize to Everyone.

He starts with Gangle.

"I'm sorry Gangle. Maybe I could help you build a comedy mask that sticks together."

Gangle, surprised as Ragatha was, waited for Jax to prank her a second later when she wasn't expecting it.

"W...w-what?" Said Gangle, confused, yet sad her comedy mask broke yet again today.

"Your mask Gangle, it's made of porcelain, so it's always breaking, you need more plastic masks so they don't break anymore. I could help ya with that. It's the least I can do, I've been a real jerk to ya and..."

Gangle then looks into Jax's eyes, seeing the determination, anxiety, and care in his eyes, her heartwarming gaze leaves Jax trailing off.

"Jax wow...I...I forgive you." Gangle smiles, seeing Jax is genuine in his apology and desire to be better. "I also accept your help to fix my masks."

Jax smiles and they hug it out, happy to be friends again, Gangle trusting Jax and being closer to him now more than ever before.

"Kaufmo may be gone, but we're still here. We'll make it, all of us, together."

Gangle sheds a tear as Jax and Gangle Hug, her ribbon arms tightening as she remembers Kaufmo upon hearing Jax speak of him.

"Of Course Jaxxy. We'll do it for him and for all of us."

...

Later, Kinger and Jax sit on the couch together after Jax asked him if they could talk.

"Kinger, I just want you to know I'm sorry.

"Ha-Okay Jax. I understand. Just be nice, and things will be grand. I knew you'd come around. All is forgiven."

They do a bro hug, and Jax and Kinger go about their day, Kinger is very understanding of Jax.

....

After that quickly lived apology, Jax approaches Pomni.

Pomni was in her room and Jax kocked on her door.

Pomni answers it.

"Hi ther-oh. Uh...Hey..."

Pomni's words were cautious and suspicious, she was ready for Jax to take a potshot at her.

"Pomni, I've got something important i want to say."

Pomni looks at Jax, studying his expression as she watched slightly guarded behind the door.

"Okaaaay...what is it?"

Jax sighs.

"I'm sorry, okay?"

Pomni pauses, not expecting Jax to Apologize.

"Sorry? Foooor...what?"

"For not treating you better when you arrived up until now, and everybody else for that matter. I've been a real jerk to you, and I'm sorry...I don't expect you to forgive me, I just want you to understand, and know that I will be looking out for everyone here on out."

Pomni opens the door a little, fully unveiling herself to Jax, seeing how frustrated and sad Jax looked, as if he had wanted to apologize for the longest time, but was too prideful and finally cracked.

"I don't understand. Why are you apologizing now? Why are you being like this?"

"Because I've caused everyone a lot of pain... and i want to do something, even if i can't make up for it..."

Pomni silently watches Jax, seeing how remorseful he was.

"I have toyed with you and screwed around too much. You're a part of the crew Pomni, and just know that we're all gonna look out for you from here on out. All of us, Ragatha, Gangle, Kinger, I've made amends with everyone, everyone except..."

"Thank you Jax. I think Zooble will find it in their heart to forgive you...I know Zooble might have most difficulty doing so, but, I can see you're sorry. Just know I forgive you, okay?"

Jax smiles, relieved to know Pomni accepts his forgiveness and has restored a level of trust with her. "Thank you Pomni. I guess I should go tell her."

"I could come with you."

"I'm the one who played with Zooble's feelings, I should do this one my own. Later Pomni."

"Okay, see ya Jax."

Pomni closes her door and Jax scoots over to Zooble's room, which her door was wide open. Zooble had three boxes full of parts of varying kinds, she was shuffling through each of them, hoping to find a pieces she'd like, seemingly frustrated over how she couldn't find one.

Jax considered checking in later, but Zooble notices him first.

"Oh great, what do you want now?" She said with a bitter tone, ready for Jax's onslaught of pranking she was used to.

"Zooble, I uh, just want you to know that I....am...sorry."

Zooble scoffs at hearing Jax saying that.

"No, you're not."

Jax felt guilty as he could feel Zooble's frustration as she rejected his apology.

"What's your ■■■■ing problem anyway? You seek to prank me a whole lot. Now you make a mess of my already wild life, and now you're just gonna walk on in her, to me, and just apologize to make it all better!? You must think I'm some kinda idiot."

"...I am sorry. I really am."

"Shut up, you aren't. You don't need to try. You're not worth it."

Jax thinks over how he's going to explain this.

"Zooble wait, I'm-

(THEN ANOTHER VOICE WAS HEARD, no, MULTIPLE, at Zooble's doorway)

"He's Sorry, he really is..." Said Gangle, trying to convince Zooble that Jax was nice for a change for real.

"Really? Clearly this is buildup for another one of his 'jokes.' He's gonna spring it on-"

"Zooble, give him a chance, he really is sorry..." Said Ragatha.

Zooble sees Ragatha feeling much better than she did earlier, feeling as if she's perhaps missed something.

"You too? What the f■■■ is going on around here? Have you guys gone Mad? Jax is a piece of sh-"

"Ha-Zooble," said Kinger next, " Jax has asked everyone for forgiveness. He changed. He's turned a new leaf."

"Kinger, Jax is always toying with us of course he's waiting to-"

Zooble stops mid-sentence to see Pomni walk up, from behind the rest of the crew at the doorway, smiling.

"He does mean it Zooble..." Said Pomni, hoping Zooble would understand, knowing how much she was hurt by Jax.

Jax, was silent, looking away, unsure of what to say.

"Uuugggh...(sigh) Fine Jax. You're forgiven. We'll work on it."

Jax lights up a little, smiling in a more happy way, as opposed to his usual sly calculated expression.

"Thank you Zooble."

The whole crew brings Jax and Zooble into a hug.

Caine pops in out of nowhere, seeing everyone her along, and gets in on the hug too.

"Aww, I'm so glad you guys are getting along!" Said Caine as they let him in on the hug too.

I'm lazy but I still wanted to put something out wheeze

Happy V Day !

#tadc #jax tadc #jaxxy #tadc jax #Jax #JaxyBoy #the amazing digital circus #digital circus #tadc fanart #tadc au #tadc fanfiction #pomni #tadc pomni #tadc caine #ragatha

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hcverns · 2 days ago

Text

Risks Taken

pairing: yoon jeonghan x fem!reader, minghao is mentioned

word count: 9.4k

warnings: mentions of drinking, cursing, some spice (making out)

genre: angst, fluff (basically angsty stuff with a happy ending), best friends to lovers.

synopsis: in the midst of enjoying his blissful saturday night with you and a romance movie, his world suddenly stopped spinning when you mentioned another guy's name.

a/n: hi oh my god i'm so nervous. this is literally my first fanfic i've ever written. i wrote this for my best friend and i asked her permission to post it on tumblr and she said yes so here i am :) i apologize for the typos and grammar mistakes or any mistake at all, really. likes, replies and reblogs would be much appreciated. much love <3

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

It was Saturday night. The TV was on in your living room. A rom-com movie was playing on the screen. What was the title, he wasn’t sure. But it was quite entertaining. He had underestimated your choice of movie at first, but you had begged him so nicely with those puppy eyes that always made him weak in the knees. Who could blame him for giving in to his best friend’s request?

So here you two were. Relaxing on the couch while watching a movie. There were a bunch of snacks on the coffee table in front of you. You were sitting side by side, both your feet resting on top of the coffee table without a single care with just the right amount of distance separating the two of you. Just a perfect Saturday night.

Jeonghan stretched his arm to reach for a bag of gummy bears on the table, only to find none of it.

“What the— Hey, did you finish all the gummy bears?” He asked you who were sitting beside him on the couch but his question was responded by silence.

He sighed and shook his head slightly. He turned his gaze to you only to notice that your eyes were focused on the TV screen. Instead of calling you out for finishing the gummy bears, he looked at your features in silence. A small smile appeared on his lips unintentionally. He noticed your hair had gotten longer. It almost reached your shoulders.

He remembered the time when you had cut your hair short. Like short, short. Masculine type of short hair. You’d been so excited to show him. He couldn’t, wouldn’t ever forget the happiness in your eyes when you facetimed him to proudly show him your brand new look. And it really surprised him with how beautiful you looked with that hair. Your excitement and confidence really added into it. He was happy to witness you being brave enough to look different, to look bold, to express yourself just like you had wanted to.

He snapped back to reality when you squealed like a schoolgirl.

“Han, they’re gonna kiss. They’re gonna kiss!” You said in excitement.

Jeonghan furrowed his eyebrows slightly. “What?”

“They’re gonna freaking kiss! You heard me.” You repeated yourself without turning your gaze in the slightest bit.

“How do you know?”

“How could I not? I’ve watched this befo— AAHH! They kiss! See?” You turned your head to him with the biggest smile on your face.

Jeonghan had to fight the urge to say “so fucking adorable” out loud at the sight of his best friend’s smiley face. Instead, he decided to ask you, “You’ve watched this movie before?”

You simply nodded.

“And you’re watching it again?”

You nodded your head again.

He sighed. “Why?”

You jerked your head back in confusion. “What do you mean 'why?'”

“You’ve watched this movie before. Why are you watching it again? What’s the point of watching the same movie twice?”

You rolled your eyes at his question. To you, it sounded so dumb. “Han, have you watched this movie before?”

Jeonghan shook his head.

“That’s why I chose this movie for our movie night. This movie is so good I couldn’t help but share the experience of watching this masterpiece with you. You should’ve thanked me, you know?”

Jeonghan chuckled a little. You really knew how to respond to literally anything. But he really needed to know why you were willing to watch the same movie more than once, so he questioned you again, “Yeah, but why are you willing to watch it again?”

You narrowed your eyes at him. “Oh boy. Just be quiet, yeah? You’ve watched ‘The Glory’ more than once as well, remember? And it’s a series. A goddamn series!” You laughed sarcastically.

He laughed as well. You got a point. He remembered when he had finished watching ‘The Glory’ for the first time and he couldn’t help but watch the said series again for the second time the very next day.

“You’re silent now, huh?” Your lips formed into a smirk.

“Shut up.” He brushed you off. The trace of his smile was still visible on his lips.

“Anyway, (Y/N), since you were very focused on two people kissing on the screen, let me ask you again. Did you finish all the gummy bears?” He raised his eyebrow.

“That… I did, yeah.” You admitted that it made Jeonghan groan.

“Well, you know what, I think I still have some in the cabinet. I’ll grab ‘em for you.” You quickly added when Jeonghan started to groan. He really did want some gummy bears, it seemed.

A smile quickly appeared on his face. “Wait, really? Don’t worry about it. I’ll do it myself. You keep going with your ‘Lovely Rosie.’” Jeonghan got up from the couch and made his way to your kitchen.

“It’s 'Love, Rosie' you jerk!” You yelled from the living room that made him laugh.

Jeonghan opened one of the hanging cabinets’ doors where you usually kept your snacks. He didn’t have to guess which one because he had been in your place many, many times.

Ever since you had started being best friends, which was roughly six years ago, you had this one night in a week, usually on Saturday night, where you just chilled and watched movies together. Of course it didn’t happen literally once in a week because, as responsible adults, you two sometimes were busy with something. But still, it was a tradition for you.

Jeonghan finally found two large bags of gummy bears in the cabinet. He smiled brightly as he held them with his right hand. He immediately walked himself back to the living room. He was so ready to plop himself on the couch before he took a quick look at you, who apparently were focused on your phone, rather than the TV screen, with a big smile on your face.

Jeonghan furrowed his brows. ‘Why is she ignoring the movie without even pausing it and why is she smiling so damn big now while staring at her phone?’ He wondered inwardly.

He slowly sat himself down on the couch. His best friend’s attention was still on her phone. He noticed your fingers typing something, seemingly.

He waited for a few seconds (which felt like hours) for you to turn your attention to him. Or the TV screen. Or the freaking gummy bears in his hand. Anything but your phone. He got a bad, bad feeling.

His curiosity piqued. He couldn’t help but ask you about it. “You’re texting someone?”

“Yup.” You answered with just one word. But this one word was enough to make Jeonghan’s heart sting a little.

“Oh.” That was all he said. He didn’t want to seem nosy so he didn’t push you to tell him who you were texting. But not gonna lie, there was a slight pang of hurt in his chest. ‘Who are you texting? Why are you smiling so bright right now?’ He questioned again.

He tried to ease his own worry by forcing himself to think positively. ‘That could be her mom. But who on earth texts their mom with a smile like that??’ The attempt to clear the fog on his brain failed miserably.

“Who?” The word just slipped out of his mouth because apparently he ran out of his self control.

You didn’t answer him immediately and that almost drove him insane.

After a few seconds of you smiling and typing and him resisting the urge to just snatch your phone himself (which again, felt like fucking hours to him), you put your phone down on the couch beside your thigh.

You looked at him, still with a smile on your face. If it were under different circumstances, he would smile back at you. Why wouldn’t he? Your smile was his favorite thing ever after all.

Instead of smiling like he usually did, he raised his eyebrow as a sign that he was waiting for an explanation.

“Sorry, sorry. What was it again?” you innocently asked him to repeat his question.

Without wasting a millisecond, he uttered what was on his curious mind. “Who were you texting?”

Your facial expression turned shy. Exactly like someone who was thinking of their crush. And the pain in his chest increased.

“It’s just… someone.”

“Someone who?” He responded quickly. Demanding for a real and clear answer.

“Was it a guy?” He hoped you couldn’t notice the jealousy in his tone.

And what he hoped for was exactly what happened, but at what cost? You were completely oblivious of his jealousy. A shy smile made an appearance on your pretty face and it was enough to confirm Jeonghan’s bad feeling.

You took a deep breath before answering him. “So, his name is Minghao…”

Jeonghan swore he could feel his heart stop for a second. You mentioning the guy’s name that you had been texting with felt like a stab to his heart. No, that can’t be. He refused to believe it. He really wanted to pull his own hair in frustration but he chose to stay silent as you continued talking about this Minghao guy.

“He’s a barista in Franky n Co, the coffee shop I work in.” Your face got slightly red as you were talking about Minghao to your best friend.

Jeonghan was using all his power to keep a straight face. He even tried to smile a little as a way to make you believe that he wasn’t jealous at all. “Are you guys dating or something?”

Your eyes widened in surprise. “N-no. We’re not dating. At least not yet, I hope.” A shy smile appeared again on your face at the end of your sentence.

“So… you like him?”

“Well, yeah. Let’s just say that me and Minghao are in a… what’s it called? Talking stage? Yeah. We’re currently in a talking stage.” You smiled widely as you explained to him what this Minghao guy was to you and it made his blood fucking boiling.

“So he likes you too?” The smile on his face right now was the fakest smile in the whole damn universe. In his mind, he was clenching his fists very tightly to the point that his fingernails hurt the palm of his hands.

Your smile faltered as you were reminded of the uncertainty of Minghao’s feelings for you. “Uh, I’m not sure. I mean, we’ve gone on two dates and they went pretty well. But he hasn’t told me whether he likes me or not and vice versa.”

When he felt his heart was stabbed earlier, this time it felt like the knife had been twisted and made the pain tenfold. ‘Dates. They had gone on two dates. Two fucking dates.’ Jeonghan was on the brink of insanity.

“You two have gone on dates? Tell me about it.” He was scared for a second that you would catch up on the sarcasm that lingered on his words.

You didn’t, though. Jeonghan didn’t know he should be grateful or hateful at your unawareness. Your eyes got excited as you were going to tell him about your dates with Minghao.

“First, it was a movie date. We went to the cinema after we finished our shift. And the second one was three days ago. It was an ice cream date..? I mean, we just went to an ice cream shop after work and we talked about several topics while eating ice cream. And he held my hand all the way home.”

Your voice was so dreamy. It sounded so sweet. If only you were talking about him in that manner rather than Minghao. He didn’t need to hear all those details. He wanted to throw up. He felt sick to his stomach. ‘That coffee maker even had a chance to hold her hand? All the way home??’

Jeonghan didn’t know what this Minghao guy looked like. He didn’t know his personality as well but he really, really wanted to punch him in the face right now.

“That sounds so cute. A movie date and an ice cream date? How adorable.” His words were completely opposite of what was truly on his mind.

“Right! Do you think he likes me back?” you asked him a question that sounds so ridiculous to him. But all he did was shrug his shoulders slightly.

“He could.”

“Yeah? You think so?” you asked him again with eyes full of hope.

‘Hell fucking no.’ That was what he wanted to say. But he wasn’t stupid enough to let that happen. He didn’t want to ruin your mood like that. So he just nodded instead.

Then, the unexpected happened. Something that made Jeonghan’s heart skip a beat. Something that made his jealousy and rage calm down even though only a bit. You squealed and threw yourself at him and wrapped your arms around his shoulders.

The hug was short, he couldn't help but long for it again when you let go.

“Thank you for convincing me that there’s a possibility of Minghao liking me back. You’re the best, Han!”

Then it came back again. The jealousy and anger. Your smallest words and acts could really put him on a wild roller coaster ride.

Jeonghan swore he didn’t mean it. He just lost control over his movement. He couldn’t think straight so he let his heart take the lead this time.

As a response to you thanking him, he rolled his eyes and scoffed.

And when he heard your small gasp, he knew he fucked up.

“What was that for?” you asked in disbelief.

Jeonghan played dumb by asking you back, “What was what for?”

“Why did you roll your eyes and scoff like that, Han?” He could hear the slight sadness in your tone.

Fuck.

Fuck. Fucking hell. Should he say it? There’s no use in hiding it anymore, right?

He was fighting a battle in his own head now. He sat in silence as his brain was working really hard to decide what his response should be.

“Yoon Jeonghan.”

He quickly looked at you when you called him by his full name like that. He couldn’t take it anymore. He wanted to leave your place, got in his car and drove himself to the highway at the speed of a hundred miles an hour while ignoring the red lights.

“What did you even see in him, anyway?” His heart took full control of his mouth now. He really did say the exact thing on his mind without a filter.

“Excuse me?”

Offended. Disbelief. Bewilderment. Confusion. A hint of anger. Jeonghan could see those emotions mixed into one on your face.

“You heard me right.” He didn’t back down. No lame excuses such as “Sorry, I was possessed by an unknown spirit that’s why I was spewing bullshit.” or “Oh, I was just reciting a line from a movie.” Nothing.

“What the fuck?”

He had it coming. He knew you would respond harshly. Those three words were enough to make the pain on his chest more intense. He didn’t say anything in return. He just looked down at the carpet beneath his feet in embarrassment and jealousy. The gummy bears he had taken earlier were long forgotten, just like the movie.

“Han, explain!” you raised your voice just a little at your best friend’s silence.

You snapped. So he did too.

“I don’t like the fact that you like that guy, whatever his name is, okay?”

If he thought that his heart was taking full control of the way he acted and spoke, he was wrong. His head was also taking control. His heart and his head were equally in chaos and clouded by jealousy. So he was sure that the words he just said to you were justified.

And he lied, by the way. He knew exactly the name of that guy.

Meanwhile, you felt like a punch had landed straight on your chest. Your brain couldn’t process the words that came out of Jeonghan’s mouth just now. You didn’t even know how to feel. Of course, you were confused as hell. But other than that, you weren't even sure. Should you feel sad? Angry? What?

“B-but why?”

The way you stuttered was almost enough for his heart to soften and to make him apologize to you immediately. Right, almost. Not entirely, no. Jealousy was still consuming his heart and head.

Jeonghan got a brief and sudden flashback to when his little heart finally had gotten the courage to admit to himself that he indeed had more-than-friends feelings for you.

✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧

It was roughly one and a half years ago. He still remembered the way he had cursed in the darkness of his room, under the warmth of his blanket. He had been in shambles. His brain had short-circuited. He was confused, sad, even angry at himself. He wanted to be angry at you too for being such an absolute flawless human being and had the audacity to effortlessly play with his heartstrings like that.

The thing is, he had never been friendzoned. Never. But he had enough information about it. A complete glossary from A to Z regarding things that were related to the said situation and none of them had a positive connotation. All thanks to his friends. Joshua drank himself to sleep for two weeks straight and Seungcheol had lost several kilos of body mass because of fucking friendzone.

And most importantly, they vented their sadness and frustration to Jeonghan.

Despite laying on his soft bed with a soft pillow under his head, he felt very uncomfortable. He wanted to rest his mind in a peaceful slumber but he just couldn’t. After a few tossing and turning, he heard his phone vibrate on the nightstand.

With a weak hand, he reached for his device and found out who texted him that late.

It was you.

thank you so much for today hannie!! im no longer sad now. in fact this gotta be the best birthday ever with my best friend ever who gave me the best present ever!! goodnite :D

“Fuck.” He cursed under his breath. Best friend. He groaned onto the pillow as his brain was recalling the recent event that happened earlier that day. Your twenty-fourth birthday.

As someone who lived far away from family, you didn’t have the privilege to have your birthday celebrated at home with your parents, siblings and pet cat. You also didn’t have that many friends in the city you currently lived in so your birthday was less lively than the ones you had before you moved out.

You weren't exactly sulky or sour but Jeonghan could see right through his best friend. It was your birthday and he wanted you to have the time of your life. Of course he already prepared a gift for you. A Hogwarts themed lego set which you eyed on when you two were window shopping two weeks ago. But he wanted to do more. He wanted to make your birthday as joyful as the ones you had in your hometown.

So he asked you to go to a beach. It was spontaneous, really. He didn’t plan it beforehand but he knew a small and beautiful beach just thirty minutes drive from the city called Azure Cove.

He remembered the way your whole face lit up when he brought up the idea of going to Azure Cove as a way to celebrate your birthday. He also could never forget the way you glowed when both of you arrived at the said location. That was the happiest of you he had ever witnessed and he felt some kind of pride for being the reason behind it.

As you were enjoying the rich color of sunset on the beach, Jeonghan went back to his car and took out the Lego set he had bought for you.

And it was the moment that made Jeonghan couldn’t fall asleep that night. The way you hugged him so tightly, your eyes slightly glistened with tears and a tender kiss on his cheek. The kiss. The goddamn kiss that made a switch in his brain flip. The kiss that made him realize that he, indeed, had feelings for his best friend for God knows how long.

He looked back at the text you had sent him. The words ‘best friend’ you put right there made him slightly bitter. Well, you weren't wrong, but Jeonghan wasn’t ready for the cursed ending he would receive for being in love with you. A friend-fucking-zone.

✧༝┉˚*❋ ❋*˚┉༝✧

Back to the current situation.

The flashback got Jeonghan a little bit dizzy. He knew he was going to be friendzoned the moment he’d realized he had feelings for you. But to be honest, he had a sliver of hope that one day, you would see him as more than a friend. People might ask, what made him have such a hope? Jeonghan didn’t know either. A blind optimism? Delusion? Anyway, a hope is a hope.

“I just… I don’t like the fact that you’re seeing that person, you know? A barista? Come on. You can do better than that.”

Jeonghan knew it was a dick move to say something classist like that. He was an accountant and everyone including him knew he earned way more than that Minghao guy. If Jeonghan was in his right state of mind, he would never say anything like that. But he was too angry, too jealous and even too sad. So, again, for him, it was justified.

You never once thought Jeonghan would say something with a classist undertone like he just did now. Your jaw dropped in surprise. You had no idea what to say. Your brain just stopped working because this whole situation was way too unexpected to happen. “What the hell did you just say?”

He scoffed. Oh, this was so not him. “Someone like you should be with someone who, I don’t know, better than that Minghao dude.”

Enough with the speechlessness. You felt like you were being degraded. Although Jeonghan’s degrading words weren’t really for you, still, it was your taste in men that got targeted. With rage in your voice, you talked back, “Yeah? Like who? And what do you mean by someone like Minghao?”

“Like me!”

Uh oh. That was it. His emotions got the best of him. He uttered those words with a raised voice. He often dreamed about confessing to his best friend about his undying love. But not this way. Never this way. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. He silently cursed his inability to stay calm and keep things cool. He wanted to beat himself up especially after he saw the shocked look on your face.

You were speechless for the nth time tonight and all thanks to Jeonghan. The soft spoken Jeonghan would never attack you multiple times in one go. When you had been angry just a few seconds ago, you were now confused as fuck. You couldn’t wrap your head around the words he just said. What the hell was that? What did he mean by someone like him? Why would he say that?

“Han, a-are you drunk right now? Did you drink something–”

“I’m not fucking drunk, (Y/N)! I’m sober, okay?” Your words were cut short by Jeonghan’s interruption. That irritated him a lot. Assuming him to be drunk? You must be joking.

“Then why did you–”

“Because I have feelings for you, damn it!"

There. The truth was out now in the open. Lingering in the air of the safe haven in the form of your living room, which currently no longer seemed safe for Jeonghan. Despite the voices of the actors conversing in the movie on the TV screen, Jeonghan could hear his heart beat faster than normal. He could also hear the gears in your head work to process the sudden piece of information he had dropped.

Jeonghan didn’t know how long the silence lasted. It felt like an eternity. He currently had two moods now. He either wanted to bury himself deep into the ground or he wanted to burst into tears.

When you finally moved your lips to say something, Jeonghan felt the urge to throw up. He completely had no idea of what was to come. But in a situation like this, he was sure everyone’s brain was programmed to automatically think about the worst case scenario. And what was the worst case scenario in his head now? You rejecting him in cold blood, telling him that you already had your eye on that coffee maker.

“Y-You’re joking, right?” You finally said.

It pissed him off, truly. Was him having feelings for you that shocking to hear? Hadn’t you seen the signs he had tried to show for the past several months? Well, he was completely aware that he had never said it directly that he was in love with you. But hadn’t you realized he had done so many things for you that he would never do to his other friends?

“Of course I’m not. I’m dead serious, (Y/N)!” He said in frustration. Jeonghan was not backing down. The truth was out. Might as well pour his entire heart out to you after holding it in for so long.

You could feel your heart beat so fast. You had never thought that you would be in such a situation. You didn’t know what to say. Your usual talkative self was in a hibernate mode. Your brain stopped working.

“But… why?” You muttered. You needed more information about whatever the hell was happening now so that you could start to think properly.

Jeonghan, getting even more frustrated now, ran his hands through his hair roughly. Why’d you had to ask him that? Couldn’t you just… reject him right at that moment so that the storm of hurt would pass quickly?

“Why what, huh? Why what, (Y/N)? Why am I in love with you? Jesus Christ, have you looked at you? You’re literally perfect. You have bewitched me with your perfection and I have been very willing to be bewitched by you. It’s a blessing for me to get to love someone like you. You make me happy. You make me feel things I hadn’t felt for so long. I love you, (Y/N). I love loving you.” Jeonghan confessed it all almost in one breath.

Seeing your best friend ramble about how much he loved you wasn’t on your bingo card. You had asked Jeonghan to give you a reason why he loved you and there you got it. Still, you found this entire situation confusing as hell. You still lost your ability to think. The only thing you felt right now was, somehow, guilt.

“Jeonghan…” you said his name oh-so-gently. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know…”

Your apology somehow sounded way worse than he had imagined. It was worse than being rejected in cold blood. Like, why were you sorry? Jeonghan hated it when people pitied him. Especially you.

He gave you a bitter chuckle. “Of course you didn’t. How could you? I never told you anything about it. Don’t be sorry, please. Nothing to be sorry about. I don’t want you to feel guilty. I don’t want your pity. But damn it. It hurts. It hurts a lot. I love you so much but you don’t love me. Not the way I want to be loved.”

When you didn’t say anything, Jeonghan seized the opportunity to say more. He just wanted to let it all out. Friendship gone, be damned. He had crossed a line that could never be uncrossed anyway.

“You didn’t see it, did you? When I did all those things for you. Things I have never done for my other friends because, well, I don’t really see you as my friend. At least in my imagination.” Jeonghan uttered while looking straight into your orbs.

Then, he averted his gaze downwards towards the beige carpet. “And now you went on dates with this… Minghao dude who I have no idea about at all. I don’t know what he looks like. He must be drop dead gorgeous, huh? I bet I can never hold a candle to him. What a lucky bastard. He’s able to brag about going on dates with someone like you. I don’t know who this Minghao guy is but I despise him already. I’m so sorry, (Y/N). I know you think I’m going insane right now. Hell, I probably am. I’m sure I look like a madman but I meant what I said, (Y/N). Every single goddamn word. I meant it.”

You could only look at Jeonghan as he crashed out. All the words he said started to get into your head. You allowed yourself to receive those pieces of information, no matter how absurd your mind made them to be.

You also allowed yourself to dive deep into the memories you had shared with Jeonghan. The moments. The events. All those things where Jeonghan’s actions had clearly shown that he cared for you more than you knew. When he had biked to your place during the rain because his car had broken down. You had experienced immense period pain and you hadn’t been able to stand on your own. So, Jeonghan and his bicycle had made their way to your apartment with a heat pack, chocolate bars and your other favorite snacks.

Despite the discomfort of his soaking wet clothes and the freezing temperature, he had given you the biggest smile when you opened the door. You, being an emotional person that you were, had cried on sight.

That was one of the prime examples of how loud his actions spoke. Even louder than words. You cursed yourself inwardly at how dumb, blind and stupid you had been. All along you had wished for Prince Charming to sweep you off your feet someday, not realizing that your very own best friend had done above and beyond for you under your nose. You couldn’t be more blind than this.

“Please, princess, say something.” Jeonghan pleaded in desperation. The silence was killing him in the most torturous way. He had never deemed himself as someone who couldn’t control his emotions especially when he had an audience in front of him but now was a special case. His vision blurred with tears and he didn’t even hide it from you. This was probably the most vulnerable he had ever been. He had bared his heart and soul in front of you, after all.

You inhaled shakily, readying yourself to say something after being quiet for what seemed like ages.

“Y-You’ve done so much for me…” You looked down and whispered. You couldn’t bring yourself to look at your teary-eyed best friend. “...and I was so blind, wasn’t I?”

The hint of self loathe in your voice didn’t escape Jeonghan’s attention. No. No, no, no. Despite his anger and frustration, his heart softened immediately. He could never watch you blame yourself for anything at all. Ever.

“No, please. It’s not your fault. It’s never your fault. It’s me, alright? It’s all me. I’ve had deep, deep feelings for you but I never said a single thing. I-I’m sorry for my outburst earlier. You didn’t deserve it.” Jeonghan swallowed hard. The lump in his throat almost made him unable to speak.

“W-Why? Why didn’t you say anything? I could’ve been more considerate of how I talked about… things.” Your voice was just above a whisper. Your head was a mess now. You felt guilty and confused at the same time.

Jeonghan wanted to cup your face to comfort you like he had done many times before but he wasn’t sure that you would feel disgusted or not. So, he settled by just grabbing your hand and stroking it with his thumb.

“Hey, it’s alright. Not your fault, okay? And I wouldn’t want you to be considerate of some bullshit and make you stop acting as your usual, comfortable self when you’re around me. I want you to always have your guard completely down when you’re with me.” Jeonghan comforted you while he was supposed to be the one who needed to be comforted.

Your eyes glistened with tears that threatened to fall. “But I hurt you. I’ve hurt you for so long and I didn’t even realize it. I hurt you just now because I selfishly flaunted my dates with Minghao at you like an idiot. I-I should’ve known–”

Jeonghan interrupted you quickly. He couldn’t let you blame yourself any further. He tightened his grip around your hand but it wasn’t too tight to hurt.

“It’s alright. You’re not in the wrong. Yes, I’ve been hurt but that’s just simply inevitable. You didn’t intentionally hurt me.”

Your dam broke. The tears you had tried to hold back were finally free falling now. You leaned closer to Jeonghan, seeking for more comfort and warmth in his arms like you had done a million times before whenever you felt horrible.

Jeonghan’s heart beat a thousand miles per hour. He hadn’t expected you to still want to be this close to him after his confession. Jeonghan pushed all his thoughts away and he wrapped his lean but muscular arms around your body. He stroked the silky strands on the back of your head and let you cry onto his chest. He didn’t mind your tears and snot ruining his shirt. He just wanted to be close to you as much as you wanted to be close to him.

All the overwhelming emotions that you contained were pouring out in the form of your tears. You were sniffling and sobbing on Jeonghan’s shirt, trying to get rid of all the guilt and confusion as Jeonghan kept whispering words of comfort to you.

After you felt like you finally had enough crying, you leaned your head back from Jeonghan’s chest and looked up at him. As beautiful as you were when you cried, the sight was still heartbreaking for Jeonghan because somehow he was the one who caused this. Your eyes were red and puffy and your nose was red as well. Jeonghan slowly reached for your face with his trembling, delicate fingers and started wiping the rest of your tears. You closed your eyes and leaned into his touch which caused his breath to hitch. The gesture was beyond intimate.

“I’m sorry for ruining your shirt.” That was the first thing you said after spending your time crying. A bit unexpected, it made Jeonghan chuckle lightly. “That’s alright. No need to worry. I have laundry detergent and a washing machine that works just fine. But… how are you feeling now? Better?” He asked while still looking down at you.

You sniffled again, trying to suck in the snot in your nostrils that had been bothering you. “In a way, yeah. But it’s funny, you know? You’re the one who is hurt and I’m the one who hurt you yet here you are, comforting me while I’m weeping like a loser.” A humorless laugh followed your words.

Jeonghan gave you a tender stare. For him, no matter the reason, if he ever saw you cry, the first thing he needed to do was to comfort you. Reciprocated or not, he would always put you first.

“You know that I could never see you cry, right? Never, ever. Well, unless when we’re watching sad movies.” Jeonghan said with a small smile, trying to lighten up the situation a little. You smiled back at him. Despite your puffy eyes, your smile still looked as pretty as ever.

For a moment, you spent your time like that in silence, staring into each other’s face. It was so intimate. Jeonghan was sure that they were actually the only couple of friends who had ever done this. He got lost easily in your beautiful eyes.

Jeonghan decided to break the silence after some time. Maybe it was just his deluded mind taking control but he believed that the ball was in his court now.

“I need to ask you something, okay? If you’re not comfortable answering, you’re free not to. No pressure, alright?” He said softly, trying not to scare you off. You nodded your head, signalling him to ask you what he wanted to ask.

Jeonghan took a deep breath, bracing himself to ask this dangerous question. “Have you ever… thought about us?” He asked as carefully as possible.

You tilted your head to the side. A gesture you always did whenever you were confused. “Like… romantically?” Your voice was filled with vulnerability.

Jeonghan was so grateful that you could catch up really quickly so he didn’t need to elaborate. His eyes lit up as he nodded, confirming your question. “Yeah, romantically. Have you ever thought about us in that way?” He tried to be as calm as possible but the surge of hope in his voice betrayed him.

Your face turned a bit sad at the confirmation. You bit your lower lip and chewed on the skin there. You didn’t quite know what to say. Never once in your life you had thought of having to face such a question.

Jeonghan picked up your uncertainty and trepidation immediately. Years of being friends with you had made it easy for him to recognize the slightest change in your facial expression.

He stroked your hair lovingly. “It’s alright. No need to be afraid. I’m a big guy, remember? I can handle rejection.” He put on a brave face and a small smile to convince you that he was fine while he was clearly not. Even though he had told you that it was okay if you didn’t want to answer, not gonna lie, he needed to hear what was in your mind. He knew the rejection would hurt him for years but he would rather have that than being kept in the dark for God knows how long.

He kept stroking your hair, trying to make you as relaxed and safe as possible, to show you that you had no reason to be afraid in front of him and you could always be honest whenever you were around him.

You swallowed the lump in your throat before finally speaking up. “I-I don’t know… I’ve thought about it a couple of times.” You said weakly, still with a hint of anxiety.

Jeonghan’s heart skipped a few beats after hearing your words. Like, what do you mean you had thought about them romantically a couple of times? What? HUH?

He had to fight the urge to halt any kind of movements that could ruin the moment. He almost curled his fingers into fists but he couldn’t do that, could he? Absolutely not. Unless he wanted to cause you pain by gripping your hair tightly in his fist. Nope. He wouldn’t do that. He would rather be tied down to a train track with a train approaching than hurting you.

Jeonghan had a really hard time finding his own voice. He tried to speak but no words came out. It was too overwhelming for him. He hadn’t expected this to happen. He had expected you to say “why would I think about us that way?” or something along the line. A big, massive, grand rejection. But, no. This wasn’t a rejection, was it? Nothing had prepared him for this.

Before Jeonghan could say a word, you beat him to it. “But every time I thought about it, it always left me feeling afraid.”

Well, that was another blow Jeonghan had never expected. So the idea of you two being romantically involved scared you. Why on earth? He no longer stroked your hair now. His hands were still around your body but he made no movement.

“And why is that, beautiful? What are you so afraid of? Tell me, please. It’s okay.” Jeonghan finally spoke with a strained voice. He desperately needed to know the reason.

You started to tear up again. You looked down to avoid his eyes. You didn’t want him to see you cry again. You sniffled before you tried to explain to him.

“Because, H-Han, I’m scared of losing you. You’re my safe place. My solace. My comfort. I could act like my very own self unapologetically whenever I’m around you. Y-You’re too precious to me. I don’t want to risk losing you.”

Although he didn’t know what that meant, he had one thing on his mind: he needed to put you at ease. He needed you to know that he wasn’t going anywhere at all. So, he pressed a gentle kiss on your forehead. His lips lingered there for a second too long but you didn’t mind it. You breathed shakily as you felt his lips touching your skin. You didn’t pull away a single inch and clutched his shirt in your fists before closing your eyes.

Jeonghan pulled away so that he could look at you. The sight of you having your eyes closed was heartwarming and heart wrenching at the same time.

“Sweetheart…” He called you with a lovely term of endearment and it made you open your eyes. He let his fingers stroke the side of your face with such tenderness. “Why’d you even think that you would lose me? I won’t go anywhere. I promise.”

You shook your head before burying your face onto his shirt. His shirt was still wet because of your tears earlier and you feared that you would ruin it even more now.

Jeonghan tightened his embrace around you.

“I-If we were like that a-and shit didn’t work out… like any other relationships out there, we would end up as strangers and I don’t want that. I don’t want to live in a world without you in it. I’m scared, Han…” Your voice was muffled and Jeonghan could feel your tears on his chest through the fabric of his shirt. “I’m so scared…” you whispered weakly.

The revelation hit him like a truck. So that was the reason. Jeonghan hated to admit it but you definitely got a point. No couple had eternity guaranteed for them. Many couples broke up. Many married couples got a divorce. It was a flawed world they lived in, after all.

But, still, call him delusional or whatever, he still wanted to taste the sweetness of loving and being loved by you properly. As lovers. He wasn’t ready to give that up yet. Especially knowing that the line had been crossed anyway after he confessed his feelings to you earlier.

Jeonghan loosened his embrace around you a little.

“Sweetheart, look at me, please. I need you to look at me. Can you do that? Please?” He begged with such gentleness.

You sniffled a couple times before detaching your face from his chest and looking up to him. Your eyes and nose were red again but still, you looked like an angel in his eyes.

He wiped the rest of the tears on your face with his fingers. “Thank you so much for telling me about your fears, princess. I know that wasn’t easy. Thank you.” He gave the top of your head a short loving kiss before leaning back to look at you again.

“I understand where you’re coming from, really. You’re precious to me too. I would rather die than lose you. But… don’t you think it’s worth the risk?”

You opened your mouth to protest but he interrupted you. He hated interrupting you especially in moments like this but he needed you to hear him out first.

“Please, sweetheart, listen to me first, yeah? I know that there are many couples out there that don't get their happy endings. Their relationships lead them to heartbreak. I get it. I understand. But the love that I have for you… it’s massive, sweetheart. And I’m ready to love you a lot more, if you let me. We could create something so beautiful together, don’t you think?”

His words were true and nothing but the truth. He had so much love to give for you. He was trying so hard not to break down in front of you. Slowly, he took both of your hands in his and brought them to his lips. He pressed gentle kisses on your knuckles, a sign to show you that he meant every word he had said, that he was absolutely devoted to you.

With your hands still in his, he continued. “I would do everything in my power to keep you happy. I would never hurt you, ever. I would never let us fall apart. If you let me, princess. Just say the word and I promise I will prove it to you.”

You felt your heart flutter. You should’ve known that your best friend was capable of loving this immensely. Even without the promise, you should’ve known that Jeonghan would go above and beyond for you. The things he had done for you throughout your precious friendship had proven enough. You just had been too blind and too afraid to acknowledge it all. But still, your fears were still there.

“B-But what if we fought? What if we argued and we broke up? What if I hurt you?” you argued weakly.

Jeonghan chuckled lightly. It seemed like you needed more convincing to finally let go of your fears, to be brave to take a step forward.

“Every couple has their own ups and downs, love. Arguments and fights are inevitable. But we could always communicate. We could always tolerate each other. I’m ready to tolerate all of our differences. And if you hurt me, I’m sure you’re able to apologize and learn from it, aren’t you? Same thing goes for me. Besides, we already have a pretty strong foundation, don’t we? We’ve been friends, well, best friends for six years. The only arguments we’ve made were probably when you insisted on having a night out and I preferred to stay in. Or when I forgot to buy your favorite ice cream that one time.” Jeonghan stroked your face lovingly with a smile on his face, offering you peace and comfort. “I promise you, there’s nothing we can’t handle.”

And with that, your doubts started to go away. You thought back to the days when you had argued over small things. Nothing intolerable. you couldn’t speak any words against him because he had made a perfect point. Maybe it was time for you to finally be brave and let go of your fears. Maybe it was time for you to completely trust him and create something unimaginably beautiful together. you gave him a vulnerable smile.

Jeonghan’s smile widened. “That’s the beautiful smile that I love so much.”

You could feel your face get warmer. You moved your hands and wrapped your arms around his neck loosely.

“I wanna learn how to love you as much as you love me, Han.”

Jeonghan had never been happier. This was the start of a new story he was about to write together with you.

“And I’ll teach you how. I’ll gladly give you all the time you need. Even if it takes forever.”

He searched for any doubt in your eyes and he found none. So, he softly touched your chin. His thumb was playful enough to trace your bottom lip. “You’re so beautiful, do you know that?” He took his courage to lean his face closer to yours.

Your heart was now beating a hundred miles an hour. Were you really about to kiss your best friend? But the idea of that didn’t sound bad at all. If anything, you were anticipating it.

When you didn’t pull away, Jeonghan inched his face closer. Before his lips landed on yours, he saw you close your eyes. Jeonghan smiled at the sight and he finally got rid of the distance.

Soft was an understatement when he felt your lips against his. He rested his lips there, not moving in the slightest. He was giving you a chance to pull away.

Two seconds had passed and you didn’t show any sign of resistance. So, he saw it as an opportunity to move his lips and you immediately followed his movement. The kiss was hesitant and careful but sweet nonetheless.

Despite the tentativeness, the kiss was better than he had ever imagined before. He had fantasized kissing you on the mouth countless times for years. Never once in his wildest dreams had he ever thought he would get to this very moment.

Because it was your first kiss with each other, Jeonghan didn’t want to cross the line. So, he slowly pulled away. But oh, boy, he needed to think twice about not crossing the line because the sight of you, with your eyes still closed, chasing his lips with your slightly parted ones was more than enough to cause a surge of desire coursing through his veins. He cursed inwardly before crashing his lips on yours again. Self control be damned.

This time, the kiss was more passionate and more urgent. As if Jeonghan was in the middle of a desert and you were an oasis. He moved his lips against yours in a sensual, intimate and lustful dance. It had you surprised for a split second but you were quick to give back the same amount of passion into the kiss.

Sensing that you actually wanted it as much as he did, he tried to deepen the kiss by licking your bottom lip, asking for an entrance. You moaned into the kiss and Jeonghan swallowed your needy sound with greed. He drank up your noises and it caused him to let out a low groan.

You parted your lips slightly, giving him access to explore your mouth. Jeonghan wasted no time sliding his tongue into the velvet walls of your mouth. Their tongues met, tasting and exploring each other. The sweetness of your wet muscles made him dizzy with need. He groaned as he deepened the kiss even more.

His hands were wandering from your waist to your hips. He let his fingers fiddle with the hem of your shirt before he boldly slid them under it, caressing your bare skin. You let out a gasp at the contact and it almost made Jeonghan growl.

He let his hands roam around freely on your torso as his kisses strayed away from your mouth to your chin and down to your neck. You couldn’t do anything besides letting him use your skin as his personal playground.

Jeonghan eventually pushed you gently to lay on the couch as he positioned himself on top of you, between your legs. You were a moaning and whimpering mess under him. Your needy noises made him want you even more. His lips kept exploring your neck, trying to find one spot that would make you go insane.

His lips weren’t the only thing that was working overtime. He also licked and nipped your throat. Enough to make you jolt with pleasure but not enough to leave a mark.

“You taste so good, sweetheart. I can do this all day.” Jeonghan whispered hoarsely against your neck. His breath was warm on your skin. You couldn’t speak properly because your brain had short-circuited the moment your lips had met.

Your fingers started tugging on his locks. The simple act made him moan. The feeling of your hands pulling his hair was making him go crazy.

“Mmh, H-Han… please– aah!” you arched your back and cried out when he nipped your collarbone.

Bingo. Jeonghan finally found that one spot that made you see stars. He paid extra attention to that one particular area by kissing, licking, nipping and lightly sucking on it.

Jeonghan chuckled at your inability to form a coherent sentence. “You like that, princess?” He gently bit your skin. “Right here, yeah? This one, sweetheart?”

You could only moan and whimper at the sensuality of his words and the way his mouth pleasured you. You weren't thinking when you bucked your hips against his. That was the moment when Jeonghan realized that he was as hard as rock.

He pulled his lips away from your collarbone and looked down on you, making you whine in protest.

“W-Why… Why’d you stop?” you asked as you were breathing heavily. Your heart was still beating so fast.

Jeonghan was panting as well. He was trying to regulate his breathing. He had to close his eyes because the sight of you so pretty under his body was downright sinful. Slowly, he sat back up on the couch and you followed suit.

“Princess… let’s stop, yeah? We can’t… We can’t keep going on. At least not yet. Not right now.” He said once his breath had started to steady.

“H-Huh? Why? Did I do bad–”

Jeonghan quickly shook his head to interrupt you because it was actually the opposite. You were too good and Jeonghan almost couldn’t resist to just take you and claim you.

He cupped your face in his palms, gently stroking your cheeks. “No, sweetheart. Of course not. You did so good. Too good. And that’s the problem.”

You tilted your head slightly to the side. “Why is it a problem?”

Jeonghan chuckled lightly. You were so adorable. “It’s a problem because I want to be a gentleman and take you out on a date first, okay? I don’t want to act purely on my urges like a wild animal. You deserve better than that, love.”

Your face lit up when the word ‘date’ reached your ears. “Yeah? You wanna take me out on a date?”

He nodded his head at your excitement. He wrapped his arms around your body in a loving embrace. “Of course I do, sweetheart. How does tomorrow sound? A nice and warm Sunday would be a good day for us to go on a date, wouldn’t it?”

You snuggled against him. “That would be so good. The sooner the better.” You were smiling from ear to ear.

“The sooner the better, indeed. So, tell me, what do you have in mind? Do you want something fancy or casual as our first date?” He asked as he tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear.

Your lips curled in a cheeky smile. “Don’t you know the answer already? Come on, we’ve been attached to the hip for years now.”

Jeonghan let out a laugh at your teasing. “You cheeky little thing. Alright. Casual, it is. How about… going to the beach, hm? We could lay on a blanket, under the sun. Maybe we could eat some pizzas as well.”

Your eyes turned starry when he mentioned the beach. That couldn’t be any better. “Which beach, Han?” you knew he would say the correct answer but you asked him anyway.

He smiled at you before bringing your hand to his lips and kissed your knuckles. He looked into your eyes and said, “Azure Cove.”

Your smile widened and you gave his lips a short but sweet kiss. Jeonghan’s heart skipped a couple of beats when you did that. He could never get used to this. Any physical contact with you might cause him a small heart attack.

“You and me at Azure Cove with a box of pizza and a bottle of vodka. Sounds like the perfect first date for me.” You gleamed as you rested your head on his shoulder.

Jeonghan stroked your hair tenderly “It’s a deal, then, yeah? I’ll pick you up tomorrow at ten o’clock. I’ll bring your favorite bottle of vodka with me and we’ll go to Azure Cove.”

“I can’t wait.” You said as you snuggled closer against his body, seeking more warmth.

Both of you spent a few minutes in a comfortable silence with ‘Love, Rosie’ still playing on the TV while cuddling each other on the couch. Then, Jeonghan decided to break the silence.

“You know… I might have something to ask from you.” He said with a hint of distaste and mischief.

You turned your head to look at his face. “What is it?”

Jeonghan’s lips formed a handsome smirk. “Ditch that Minghao guy.”

You bursted out laughing and it made him laugh as well. “Oh my God, Han, I completely forgot about his existence the moment you said you like me. Trust me, he’s the least of your concern right now. I got my eye on you and only you.”

Jeonghan had never ever been happier.

#seventeen x reader #svt x reader #seventeen fluff #seventeen angst #svt fluff #svt angst #jeonghan x reader #yoon jeonghan x reader #jeonghan fanfic #yoon jeonghan fanfic #jeonghan scenarios #yoon jeonghan scenarios #svt scenarios #seventeen scenarios #yoon jeonghan #jeonghan

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alwaysobsessed777 · 2 days ago

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Ooo you could do one with Nika coming back to UConn the other day, maybe her gf is still in school (doesn’t have to be on the team) so they get to visit and go to the game together, just a fluffy one :)

BACK HOME - N.M.

Back on my shit....imma write my Nika fluff so enjoy

"I TOLD YOU!" Paige's voice echoed through the gym. Rolling my eyes, I chased after the ball.

"Next time....you're getting the ball yourself," throwing the ball a little harder than intended, it bounced off the blonde's head.

"BRO....WATCH THE BRAIDS!"

"Shut up, P," Azzi screamed from the bench, earning a stuck out tounge in return.

"Yeah, Twin. Shut up."

The voice stopped me in my tracks. Everyone's eyes landed on me. Slowly turning around, I was meet with the girl I had been missing for months.

Nika.

"Hey, baby," even before both words could fall from her lips, my arms wrapped around her. My head nuzzled itself into her neck. Words couldn't describe how much I've missed her.

"I see that I've been missed..." one of her hands gently rubbed my back, the other softly combing through my hair.

My head shot up, looking at the Croatian, "how...hie are you here?"

She pretended to think, "A plane...a car...anything really that moves would help me get here."

I chuckle, "shut up, smartass."

"you've missed it....i know it."

She wasn't wrong. I did miss it. I missed everything about her. Her smile, her eyes, her charm, her voice. You name it, I've missed it.

"Can we get going, bruh," the blonde's hand gripped onto my shoulder, but nothing adverted my attention from my girlfriend. "We have a game to warm up for...earth to y/n?"

"shut up, I'm with my girlfriend." Paige huffed, stomping off somewhere.

Nika separated us enough to intertwine our hands, walking is to the bench. Her waves of brown flowed over her shoulders, bouncing a little with each step.

"I wanna talk ...catch up on things," nervousness laced her voice. The small sound to her tone made her cute, the same voice she used to ask me out.

"that's sounds like an amazing idea," the seats being comfortable enough, we sat down. "I've missed you a lot, Nika."

"I've missed you too, y/n."

A silence fell between us, our eyes locking, before a comfortable laughter escaped both of us. The awkward tension being from not seeing each other for months, but you could feel it slowly dissipating.

"So...basketball season?"

I groaned, "don't get me started on it....like why are we good...but not like last year good."

"you don't have me..." she waited for my reaction, a smirk playing on her lips.

"you know....i know you're joking...but we truly need a get you back in a UConn jersey," laughing it out, Nika snickered.

"only if I could," a sadness contorted on her perfect features. I instantly felt bad.

"I'm sorry."

"hey...don't be. I'll eventually be able to get back on the court."

I nodded, "....are you excited to watch us tonight?"

"I'm excited to watch you!" Her hands clasped around my face, a smile stretched on her lips.

"I love you," she rested her forehead on mine, a small gesture that always made my heart flutter.

"I love you too," she leaned back, looking me straight in the eyes, "also...im wearing your jersey...i better see the best game ever from you."

"yes ma'am," snickering, her hands fell from my face.

She leaned in, capturing my lips in hers. They moved together as if they were a puzzle being pieced together. Her hands landing on my waist, pulling me closer to her. My hands worked towards the back of her neck. My fingers fiddling with her brown hair.

"uh...guy?" A voice broke is out of the small trance we were previously in. "Geno said stop sucking each others faces."

"Paige, shut up."

She held her hands up in surrender, "hey, don't kill the delivery guy."

"I think she said that completely wrong," I looked at the brunette beside me.

"she definitely did," she looked at me again with her brown doe eyes, my favorite sight, "I should let you get to practice...remember....play for me babe"

"I would never play for anyone else."

***********

A/n : sorry if this sucks.....I got the urge to write....and wrote half of this like asleep....don't ask how

#wbb #nika muhl #wnba basketball #wcbb #uconn wbb #wnba players #wbb x reader #womens basketball #nika muhl x reader #wnba

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calware · 2 days ago

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there's something to be said about how at a certain point it doesn't matter how well you explain yourself or how thorough the explanation is or how often you do it there is always going to be someone who misconstrues your words (maliciously or otherwise) and broadcasts that to everyone else and it's only a matter of time before you've got people sending anons to your friends and followers about something you aren't or never did or don't believe in and you might even end up on a public blocklist. and i've had those happen to me and it feels like just just a matter of time before i get the capital C Callout and there's nothing i can do to mitigate that

i have to always watch what i say and how my words might be twisted or what i associate myself with and how that will reflect on me. and a little bit of that is always good practice for everyone but the consequences should not be this dire. if i've had to tell you (you) in the past that i can't interact with a certain post or promote a certain project for x y or z it's because this is the reality when you're in a position where people are waiting with their finger on the trigger for you to say or do something that can be used against you. i've seen it happen to my friends, mutuals, bloggers i look up to where they're bullied or driven off the site for stuff that is blatantly untrue. it never escapes my mind that i'm in a box that's slowly shrinking

and again this isn't "i have #controversial opinions and i can't have anyone disagree with me because ill get #canceled" or "i have never done anything wrong and never will" it's literally "the more followers you have, the more people there are that will lie about you on the internet and there is nothing you can do to stop it"

#all it takes is just one person with no critical thinking skills and an audience who will listen #and guess what website we're on...

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greenwitchfromthewoods · 1 day ago

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family time. l Frankie "Catfish" Morales

Summary: you came back from your parents in a really bad mental state

Warnings: angst, toxic parents, crying, emotional crisis, mentioning therapy, guilt

A/N: this is something i've been wanting to write for a while now. remember that what you feel is important and don't be afraid to ask for help, even professional help.

your feedback is very important to me and I want to thank you for all the reblogs, comments and likes. I secretly hope you like this story.🖤 sorry for all the mistakes

[my masterlist] [Frankie Morales masterlist]

He knew something was wrong even before the first words left your lips. Even the grating of the key in the lock was different. You took off your shoes differently, and the bag you had in your hand fell to the floor with a dull thud.

"Hi, honey." Frankie's large hands cupped your face, and familiar lips brushed yours. "I missed you."

You didn't answer. The only thing you did was snuggle into his broad chest and cling to him so tightly that for a moment he wondered if you had decided to crush his ribs. The smile disappeared from his face, and soon he was stroking your back, trying to understand what had happened.

"Long trip?" he asked.

You had spent almost the entire last week at your parents' house, but if Frankie could be honest, he could see that you didn't feel like going there at all. Your mother had once again reproached you for not visiting them and not caring about your parents at all. With the look of a scolded child, you packed your bag and went to do your unpleasant duty.

"That was horrible." You mumbled quietly, your shoulders relaxing slightly. "Next time, please remind me to break my leg so I don't have to go there."

"Hey, hermosa." Frankie sighed and with no small effort, he pulled away to arms' length, his sweet brown eyes staring at you intently. "What happened?"

A quiet sigh escaped your lips. There was everything in it.

"What could have happened?" You asked rhetorically, freeing yourself from his arms and dragging yourself towards the living room where you collapsed on the couch. You grabbed one of the pillows and held it tightly to your chest like a shield. "It was like usual. I went there, from the moment I stepped inside I felt like a child who came home with a bad grade. First there was dinner, because I definitely can't cook and only my mom knows how to prepare meals." Frankie sat down next to you, rested his arm on the headrest and listened to you carefully with a small wrinkle between his eyebrows. "Dad noticed a scratch on the bumper of the car so he said that I can't drive and I shouldn't..."

"But I was the one who had the meeting with the shopping cart." Frankie interrupted you, surprised.

"Oh! I didn't tell them that." You snorted, shaking your head. "I didn't want to give them a gun before the evening news. But don't worry, they remembered you."

Frankie gulped. Your parents were...specific. He would be lying if he said he liked them, but he never spoke ill of them. Even when you were spilling your grievances and tears, Frankie just listened and patted you on the back. He didn't want to tell you that, but he had felt from the beginning that this trip wouldn't bring you anything good.

"I shouldn't have gone there at all." You said quietly as if you were reading his mind, your gaze fixed somewhere on the wall opposite "I always hope that it will be different, but I always come back broken into a thousand pieces..."

"Baby..." Frankie carefully brushed the hair away from your face and noticed how you bit your lip trying to stop yourself from falling apart "Maybe next time I'll go with you?"

You chuckled "Better not. As much as I would appreciate it, they... I don't want to talk about it, Frankie. I'm sorry."

"Hey," he moved closer, a warm hand resting on your knee and squeezing it lightly "You have nothing to apologize for, you didn't do anything wrong. We can talk about it when you feel up to it."

You nodded. He kissed your temple, inhaling your pleasant scents

He knew you so well that he knew that what you held inside was eating you alive. Despite everything, he didn't ask or push. Frankie knew that when you were ready, you would finally tell him everything, and he would be ready to listen and give you everything he could.

So for the next two days you pretended that everything was fine, even though you were clearly devastated. It wasn't until the third day passed and Frankie brought freshly washed and folded clothes to the bedroom that he heard a quiet sob from behind the bathroom door.

"Sweetie?" he knocked on the door "Are you okay?"

"Y-yeah, I'm fine..." you replied trying to hide your sobs, it squeezed his heart.

"You don't sound like it." he replied "Will you open the door, please?"

The lock creaked softly and Frankie pushed the door open slightly. Although he expected you to eventually crack, he wasn't prepared for the sight. Something sank inside him the moment his eyes landed on your face.

You had only just managed to take off your clothes, which were now lying on the tiles. You stood before him in your underwear, make-up turning into black spots under your eyes, your lips swollen and eyes red, your hair a mess.

"What's wrong with me?" you groaned and more tears rolled down your cheeks. "No matter what I do and what I don't do, I'll never be good enough for them... And I try so hard and..."

"Hermosa, please..." he tried to touch you, to show you that he was with you, but you pulled away and Frankie respected that immediately.

You gasped for breath between sobs, the heat rolling through your body, and the bathroom was becoming more and more claustrophobic. Only him standing before you seemed as real as ever, his soft brown eyes staring at you with a mixture of fear, sadness and concern.

"I'm trying, Frankie..." you finally said in a shaking voice "Every day. I keep trying to meet their expectations, but I can't do anything to reach the bar they set for me. Why? Why can't they see that?" you sucked in a breath, he knew you were trying to hold back a sob to finally get it all out of you. He'll accept it, bear it, he'll do anything for you. "Ever since I was a kid I've always been not enough for them. Not smart enough, not talented enough, not pretty enough... They kept repeating it, and their words have seeped into my brain, that I'm no longer able to think about myself differently. And I read all these smart books, listen to these podcasts that tell me it's bullshit. I know the fucking theory, but I can't... Fuck!"

You pressed your hands to your eyes and sat on the edge of the tub. You didn't see, but you heard and felt Frankie move closer, then crouched down in front of you, his arms wrapping around your legs. Warm lips brushed your thighs.

"I thought time would make it easier. But I'm still on some invisible leash. I feel guilty... I feel inadequate and..." your voice broke.

"Say it, hermosa." he said quietly.

He knew you had to get it out, only then could you feel better. No matter what the words were, once you said them you'd get them out and then he could do something about it.

"I feel unworthy of love..."

Something sank even deeper in his chest.

"I was driving here to you, wondering why you were even with me when I was like this. You deserve someone who isn't as fucked up as I am and... I'm sorry."

Your hands rested where Frankie had kissed you just a moment ago, your nervous fingers twisting, and you tried to calm your breathing. Only after a few seconds did his warm voice break the silence.

"Can I say something, honey?" you nodded and greedily grabbed his fingers when his hands touched yours. "I won't lie, your parents are fucked up. No, listen." you opened and closed your mouth immediately. "When I met you, I thought nothing good would ever happen to me in life. And here I am, living with the most wonderful woman I've ever met in my life. You're beautiful, smart, quick-witted, funny and sassy. I love every single thing about you, even the things that piss me off sometimes. And you know why? Because it's you."

The grimace that appeared on your face was probably supposed to be a smile, but new tears rolled down behind it.

"I'm angry that these people make you feel this way. Parents shouldn't do this, I don't know why they can't see how amazing you are, but it's not your fault. None of this is your fault."

"They want what's best for me. Maybe if I..."

"If you had a daughter, if you saw her the way I see you now, would you tell her it was for her own good? I don't think so. That's not love, honey. That's some sick ambition, and you shouldn't care about it."

"They're my parents, Frankie. I can't help but care."

"You'd be surprised to know how many people in the world feel the way you do, and how many have cut themselves off from people like that in order to heal."

You knew he was right. Deep inside you knew that Frankie was telling the truth and you would say those words to anyone who was in a similar situation. But when it comes to you...

"I told you once that I went to therapy, remember?" he said after a moment of silence, you nodded "Maybe... Maybe you should think about meeting with someone to talk, to sort things out in your head. You know, honey, that I will always listen to you, but a professional can teach you, give you the tools to deal with it."

You looked at him with resignation. "Won't you think I'm crazy then?"

"Oh, please!" he smiled and placed a hand on your cheek, his thumb stroking your damp skin. "It takes a lot of courage, that's what you told me, remember? I want you to feel better, and if it can help you, then I totally support you in this."

"Thank you."

Now you managed to smile, weakly but it was a success. Frankie stood up and brushed his lips against yours. You stood up too and snuggled into him, the strong beating of his heart calming you down, grounding you. A sense of security and peace slowly began to fill you. You already knew that even if you didn't get rid of these thoughts as quickly as you wanted, this guy would be with you despite everything. He didn't judge you, he didn't criticize you, he didn't say you were overreacting. What you felt was real and important to him, he wanted the best for you.

"I love you, Frankie." You whispered, hugging him even tighter.

He smiled, kissed the top of your head, "I love you more, hermosa."

"I think... I think I smeared my mascara on your shirt."

"Never mind." Frankie chuckled, "But I can draw you a hot bath, bring you a glass of wine and..."

"Will you join me?"

You pulled away and looked at him. God only knew how much he loved you, and in moments like these he felt it in every cell of his body.

"Always." he replied, pecking your lips, "Always."

☆☆☆☆

Thank you for your time.

#pedro pascal #frankie morales x reader #frankie morales #triple frontier #francisco morales #francisco morales x reader #frankie morales x f!reader

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hollaforlyla · 2 days ago

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Hello!! Can I request a Sonic x fem reader where Sonic comforts reader who is struggling with low self esteem, and Sonic comforts and ultimately confesses he is in love with reader 🫶

" MORE THAN ENOUGH " ── sonic x fem!reader

yahooooo, we love confessing our feelings to our friends however you will never see me doing that bc im a chicken anywho happy valentine's day everyone 💖💌 no warnings, just fluff🫶🏻💖

You sat on the edge of a grassy hill, knees pulled to your chest as the wind gently ruffled your fur. The sky was painted in warm hues of orange and pink, the sun slowly dipping below the horizon. It should’ve been a beautiful sight, but your thoughts made it hard to appreciate.

You sighed, gripping your arms tighter around yourself. Lately, you couldn’t shake the feeling that you weren’t enough— not strong enough, not fast enough, not… important enough. You weren’t like Sonic. He was brave, selfless, a hero. You were just… you.

You barely noticed the blur of blue until a familiar voice broke through your thoughts.

"Yo, there you are! I've been looking all over for ya!"

You turned slightly, finding Sonic standing behind you, his usual confident grin faltering when he saw your expression. Without another word, he plopped down beside you, resting his arms on his knees.

"Okay, spill it," he said, tilting his head toward you. "What's on your mind?"

You hesitated, biting your lip. "It’s… nothing, really."

Sonic arched a brow. "C'mon, [Y/N]. You don’t have to do that with me." His voice was softer now, more serious. "Talk to me."

You sighed, staring at the horizon. "I just… I don’t feel like I’m good enough. For anything. I feel like I'm just… here. Like I don’t matter as much as everyone else."

Silence stretched between you two, but instead of feeling awkward, it was comforting. Sonic was thinking, really thinking, about what you said. Then, without warning, he stood up, turning to face you with that determined look in his eyes.

"Alright, first of all, that’s the biggest load of nonsense I’ve ever heard."

Your eyes widened. "Wha—"

"You’re more than enough, [Y/N]." He knelt down in front of you, placing a hand on your shoulder. "I mean it. You matter. You always have. You don’t have to be the fastest or the strongest— you just have to be you. And trust me, that’s already pretty awesome."

Your chest tightened at his words. "But—"

"No buts." He poked your forehead lightly, making you blink. "You’re kind, you’re smart, and you make things better just by being around. You keep me grounded, y’know that?"

Your heart skipped a beat, and you suddenly found it hard to meet his gaze. "...You really think that?"

Sonic huffed a small laugh. "Of course I do. And…" His voice wavered just slightly before he rubbed the back of his neck, cheeks dusted with the faintest pink. "Honestly? I think you’re more than just important. You mean a lot to me, [Y/N]. More than I probably realized at first."

Your breath hitched. "Sonic…"

His emerald eyes softened as he took your hands in his. "I… I think I’m in love with you."

The world seemed to stop. Your heart pounded so hard you swore he could hear it. Sonic… loved you?

"You don’t have to say anything right now," he added quickly, but his grip on your hands didn’t falter. "I just… I needed you to know. Because no matter what you think, you’re not 'just here.' You mean everything to me."

Tears pricked your eyes, but this time, they weren’t from sadness. A shaky smile formed on your lips as you squeezed his hands back.

"You mean everything to me too, Sonic."

Relief washed over his face before his grin returned, though softer, more genuine. "Well, that’s good to hear."

Without thinking, you leaned forward, resting your forehead against his. Sonic froze for a second before chuckling, his arms wrapping around you in a warm embrace.

"See?" he murmured. "Told ya you’re amazing."

And for the first time in a long while… you believed it.

#sonic #sonic x reader #sonic the hedgehog #sonic the hedgehog x reader #modern sonic #sonic boom #classic sonic #x reader #sth #sonic fandom #fluff #fem reader #my writing

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petersasteria · 1 day ago

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No Way - G Dragon/Kwon Ji-Yong

Pairing: asshole!GD x Fem!Reader Summary: He wants a divorce

A/N: Thank you all so much for showing love to my first GD fic! As requested, part 2 is in the works! For the meantime, here's another GD fic. Lmk if you want to be in my GD taglist <3

my other gd fic

"I want a divorce."

As soon as those words came out of his mouth, your heart sank and your jaw dropped. After 6 years of marriage and one daughter together, you'd think he'd be satisfied. Alas, you were wrong.

You stared at him, gobsmacked by the audacity he had to ask that of you. What surprised you was his nonchalance.

You were quietly reading a novel in your living room when he said that. You just brought your daughter to school, finished your household chores, and you just baked a nice batch of chocolate chip cookies, letting it cool down in the kitchen. As you turned your page to the next chapter of your book, you heard the footsteps of your husband emerging from your shared bedroom.

You looked up with a soft smile on your face, taking in his features. Ji-yong has always been really handsome. You looked at him from head to toe. His hair was tousled the right way, his skin was smooth, his feet were clad in fuzzy socks protecting them from the cold floor, and his pajama set was very cute on him. His face, although tired-looking, still held such an effect on you. He looked dangerous, but innocent at the same time.

Just as you were admiring him, he said those words.

"I want a divorce."

"Why?" was all you said. You didn't understand. Everything was going swell.

He looked at you with no remorse and shrugged, "Found someone else. I realized she was more interesting than you, more attractive too. You changed when we had our daughter."

You scoffed in disbelief and shook your head. You were speechless. You stared at each other for a moment before you stood up and walked to the kitchen. He followed behind you.

"So? Are we finalizing things or what?" He asked, clearly wanting to pester you about the divorce. "I've spoken to my lawyer already. It shouldn't be complicated if you cooperate-"

You cut him off as you put the cookies you baked in your daughter's cookie jar, "We're not finalizing shit until I say so. You're the one who pestered me about this, so we're not doing anything until I give a go signal, Kwon Ji-yong."

"You say you've spoken to a lawyer? Good for you, but I don't give a shit. You can't just end our marriage after meeting someone new."

"Yes, I can. I'm your husband."

"And I'm your WIFE, Ji-yong."

You looked at each other intently. He was honestly surprised that you didn't back down easily. He was so used to getting what he wanted from you that it surprised him that he didn't get his way this time.

"I need space. You can stay in your office. I'll stay out here and clear my mind." You said curtly, before moving past him, shoving his shoulder as you made your way back to your comfy position on the couch. He stumbled back a little bit and chuckled to himself in frustration. He ran a hand through his hair and glanced at the cookie jar you just filled up. He grabbed it and was about to open it when you shouted, "Don't even think about it, Kwon Ji-yong!"

"How do you even know what I'm about to do?!" He shouted back as he carefully put the glass cookie jar back in its place.

"I'm your wife, stupid." You looked back at him as you picked your book up. "And I know you so well that's why it saddens me that you want to replace me with someone who doesn't know you at all."

The house was silent by the time your daughter came back from school. You weren't in the right mental and emotional state to pick up your daughter, so you kindly asked Daesung to pick her up before you walked out of your apartment to buy dinner, not wanting to cook anymore.

By the time you got home, Ji-yong, Daesung, and your daughter were in the living room. You looked at them from afar and smiled. Your daughter was performing a new dance she learned at school as Daesung and Ji-yong cheered for her.

"Eomma!" your daughter grinned as she ran towards you to give you a tight hug. If there was one thing right in your marriage, it was when you had your daughter. You kissed the top of her head and told her to watch tv in the living room. You didn't want her to see all the pettiness and drama.

Daesung smiled and said, "Hi, Y/N! Where've you been?"

"Yeah, sweetheart, where've you been?" Ji-yong smiled sweetly at you as he got up from his seat to give you a kiss on the lips. If he hadn't told you about the divorce, you'd believe this act of sweetness. Now, you knew he was just doing it to make you agree with the divorce.

"I went out and bought us dinner. I didn't feel like cooking." You shrugged and placed the food down on the dining table.

"Honey, you should've told me and I would've cooked." Ji-yong said in fake concern, quickly helping you setup.

Daesung got up from his seat and stared at both of you. "You guys are couple goals." He said lovingly. "It's really nice to see a couple who're still very much in love and involved."

"In love and involved?" Ji-yong asked.

Daesung nodded. "Yeah. You can't be involved without being in love and you can't be in love without being involved. They go hand in hand. Like how you're involved in helping Y/N set up the table. You wouldn't do that if you're not in love with her."

You knew it was casual, but you looked at Ji-yong and he just looked down and continued to help. "Um, let's eat!" You called.

After dinner, Daesung helped Ji-yong clean up as you got your daughter ready for bed. After tucking her in, Daesung left, leaving you and Ji-yong alone.

"I'll get ready for bed." You quietly said. He nodded and said, "I'll be in my office."

As you sat down on your shared bed, everything dawned on you. Kwon Ji-yong wasn't a perfect partner. He had many lapses, yet you chose to stay because your love for him waived off every shitty thing he did. You loved him and he's not going to make you go away easily.

With rage bubbling inside you, you stood up and marched to his office down the hall. You barged in and saw him FaceTiming with that girl he was going to replace you with. He was surprised to see you, to say the least. You closed the door behind you, marched towards him, ended the FaceTime, blocked and deleted her contact, and turned off the phone.

"What the fuck, Y/N?!" He shrieked.

"The answer is no. I don't want a divorce and we will never have one." You said calmly.

"Ji-yong, we've been together for a total of 12 years. 6 years as a couple and 6 years as husband and wife. You can't push me away that easily. In all our years together, I have been nothing but calm and collected despite all the things you did behind my back."

"You think I don't know everything you did? Late night calls? Late night texts? Coming home late? Coming home smelling like some other woman's cheap perfume? I'm not stupid. I know everything. I could've told the press, your family, your bandmates, and your agency, but I didn't. I have respect for you as a husband, Ji-yong. I'm just upset that you don't have respect for me."

"I-"

"No, you don't get to talk right now, Kwon." You snapped at him. "I've put up with your shit for 12 years and it's your time to listen to what I have to say. You never gave me a chance to speak, anyway."

"You actually think I'm crazy enough to allow you to leave me for some girl you met at a bar? That's not happening. No way. You seem to lack respect for me after giving you a daughter that you've always wanted. You can't just have a daughter and treat her mother like shit. You think you have the upper hand? You're wrong. I do. You think our daughter will stay with you after this whole debacle if I choose to push through with it? Absolutely not because you won't ever see her again."

"You think you'll win the divorce? On what grounds, hm? With our situation, it looks like you have the short end of the stick, honey. You'll lose this luxury apartment, you lose a lot of hard-earned money, you'll lose your fanbase, you'll lose the status you worked ever-so hard for, and you'll lose your family."

"What makes you so confident that you'll win, Y/N?"

You smirked, "I know all about those girls from years ago until now. One of them's from Jeju, one from Gangnam, three from Busan, and your current one is from Sejong, right? I know more than you think, Ji-yong. Don't ever underestimate me. I also know about the secret phone in your car. You even used your credit card to buy your new side piece new jewelry for Valentine's Day. Mind you, I got nothing. If anything, I should be divorcing you, but I choose not to because I don't want to ruin our family dynamic and despite what you think, I know deep down you still love me. You're just having a mid-life crisis."

"Now, the floor is yours." You said to him. You looked at him intently in the eyes and kneeled down in front of him as you grabbed both of his hands. "I'm on my knees now, so please tell me what you think I did wrong to deserve the divorce you're serving me."

"Before you say anything, let me remind you that I've been humble, loyal, I know the right time to speak and not speak, I swallow my pride when I'm wrong, I never manipulated you to get my way, I gave you everything you wanted from me, I never gave you an emotional heartache, I never hurt you mentally and physically. Ji-yong, I'm being reasonable here because I know I was, I am, and will always be a stand-up wife and partner you can count on and I know I have never let you down."

"If you can tell me a single thing I've done to cause you such intense harm, then I'll go." You finished.

Ji-yong was stunned. He didn't know what to say at all. You were right about everything, after all. He was just too full of pride to admit. it. He stayed quiet.

"What? Cat got your tongue? You've got nothing to say? Nothing that you can think of?" You chuckled lightly before standing up and letting go of his hands.

"I'm not going away, Ji-yong. If you think you can get rid of me easily, you're mistaken. You chose me to be your wife and I know you chose me for a reason. I meant what I said in our vows. Now, it's time for you to stop pretending you hate my guts enough to leave me and it's time for you to step-up and be a man of his word."

You walked towards the door and stopped before saying, "If you're ready to stop with this divorce nonsense, I'll be in our bed welcoming you with open arms, ready to forget about this and move on. If you wish, I'd happily go to marriage counseling, but I will not stand for a divorce, especially if there's no solid ground for you to work against me. Good night, Kwon Ji-yong."

A/N: I hope you all liked it!

#g dragon #g dragon x reader #g-dragon x reader #k's works #g-dragon #kwon ji yong x reader #kwon ji yong #kwon jiyong x reader #kwon jiyong #kwon jiyong fanfic #kwon ji-yong #kwon ji-yong x reader #bigbang #gdragon #gdragon x reader #jiyong

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lucy90712 · 2 days ago

Text

My valentine forver- Jude Bellingham

5 years old

"Y/n I want to ask you something" Jude said as we were playing together during lunchtime

"What is it Judey?" I asked

"Will you be my valentine?" He asked

"Sure but what's that" I said

"I don't really know but my mummy and daddy keep talking about a Valentine's Day and being each others valentine so I guess it's just something best friends do" he said

"Ok I'll be your valentine as long as you push me on the swings" I said

"Deal let's go" he said grabbing my hand to help me up

~~~~~~~~~~

"Hey sweetheart how was your day?" My mummy asked when she picked me up after school

"It was good Jude asked me to be his valentine" I said

"He did what?" She exclaimed

"He said its something best friends do and he's my best friend so now we are each other's valentines" I said

"That's exciting we'll have to talk to Jude's parents about that" she said

9 years old

For what feels like the first time in forever it's nice enough for us to be allowed outside at break time. Me and my friends all wanted to play football with the boys as they always think they are so good but we think we are just as good. There wasn't enough of us to make a full team to play the boys but we drew straws and organised ourselves into two teams. I ended up on the same team as Jude which is what I was secretly hoping for as we've played together before and we worked really well together so I was happy to get to play with him again.

The years of friendship mean that Jude and I are pretty in tune with each other especially on a football pitch. Today was no different we didn't really need anyone else on our team as we both managed to run round the kids on the other team and pass back and forth until the ball went in the back of the net. It was so much fun but most importantly I was glad to make the other girls proud as maybe now the boys will take us seriously and let us play with them more often. Sadly we didn't get to gloat for too long as the bell rang meaning we had to go back to class. On the way back in I went to grab my water bottle but before I could Jude grabbed it for me as his was right next to mine.

"You played great out there you should really join a team" Jude said

"My mum won't let me she says I can't do both football and dance and I'm committed to dance this year but maybe next year I'll do football" I said

"Maybe you can join my club and we can play together" he said

"That would be fun" I said

"Wait y/n before we go into class I need to ask you will you be my valentine?" He asked

"I'm sorry Jude I just don't like you like that I like being friends but that's it I'm sorry if that hurts your feelings" I said running off to go back into class

Jude looked a little sad for the rest of the day which made me feel awful but I just don't like him that way in fact I don't like any boys that way because that's gross. I like our friendship we play together at school and he's taught me a lot about football but that's it nothing else.

13 years old- Jude's POV

Come on Jude you can do it. It's not that difficult just say the words. What's the worst that could happen. Well she could say no but she's done that before and I survived but this time it feels different we aren't 9 anymore and dating isn't something to be sneered at anymore. Being rejected now will probably hurt a lot more but I can't be thinking about that or else I'll chicken out for like the 5th time.

I've had a crush on y/n for years but this past year it's only gotten worse. She's just so beautiful I can't stop myself from staring at her from across the room when we are in class together. I'm not the only one who has a crush on y/n all the guys in our year and even some in the year above are always talking about how pretty she is. I'm not as popular or as attractive as some of the guys who also like y/n but I'm hoping that after our many years of friendship she'll feel the same as me and if I can ask her first then I think I stand a good chance, at least that's what I'm telling myself.

After school today we have football practice and y/n will be there as she plays with the team when she's allowed as the school doesn't have a girls team. I made sure to get changed quickly so I could be the first one out there so as soon as y/n was ready I could ask her out as we warm up. As she made her way outside she was talking to one of the other guys in the team Jack and she had a big smile on her face which isn't unusual but it did make me a little nervous.

"Hey Jude" she said as she came over

"Hi you seem extra happy today what's going on?" I asked

"Jack just asked me out so we're going to go on a date this weekend as long as my parents let me but they like Jack so I'm confident" she said

"Oh wow I didn’t know you liked him" I said trying not to give away my disappointment

"I've liked him for a while but I never told anyone a I only ever get teased for saying I like anyone so I kept it to myself" she explained

"Well I'm happy for you" I said completely lying

It really broke my heart that she's with someone else but I really should've seen it coming she's the prettiest girl in school it was only a matter of time before someone asked her out. That doesn't mean it hurts any less but I'll get over it and at least we are still friends even if she can't be my girlfriend I can still hang out with her.

15 years old - Your POV

Maybe love just isn't for me. I've been with two guys over the last few years and both have cheated on me with one of my friends so I've lost a lot of friends but luckily I still have Jude. Since all the drama I spend a lot more time with him as I know he won't betray me and there's no drama surrounding him which is exactly what I want I don't care about being popular and having lots of friends anymore I just want true friends. I call Jude my friend but that's not really how I feel about him after spending more time together I realised that I truly enjoy Jude's company in a way I've never enjoyed being around anyone else. I'm not entirely sure when my feelings started to change but it must've been before my last boyfriend cheated on me as it hurt but I wasn't as upset as the first time because I just wasn't as emotionally attached anymore.

I've had many chances to tell Jude how I feel but I just haven't been able to make myself do it. I'm not stupid I know there was a time when pretty much all of the guys in school had a crush on me Jude included but I don't know if he feels the same now. He used to get awkward around me which is what gave him away but he doesn't act like that anymore which makes me think that he doesn't like me that way anymore. Jude has been such a good friend to me since we were 5 but especially the last few years we are always together whether it be at lunchtime in school or kicking a ball around down the park at the weekend. I value our friendship so much that I can't bring myself to tell Jude how I feel, the possible rejection isn't worth our friendship to me.

I've put my feelings aside for a few months now but as it's approaching Valentine's Day and I hear my friends talking about that their boyfriends are doing for them it makes me a little sad and maybe a little jealous that I don't have that with Jude. In a completely genius move I'm spending the next few days with Jude helping him get some extra training in as he's playing a big match soon and he wants to play well and he likes to test his skills against me. Our plan is to go straight from school to the park where they have football pitch we can play around on until it gets dark.

~~~~~~~~~~

"You're going to do great in that match you are definitely too much for me to be able to keep up with" I said

"You're still coming back from injury though" he said

"You still beat me fair and square like a million times trust me you've got this" I said

"Do you have any plans Sunday?" He asked out of nowhere

"Thats Valentine's Day right definitely no plans for that day" I laughed trying to make a joke of how sad my love life has been

"Then would you like to go on a date with me?" He asked

"What" I said completely in shock

"That was stupid I'm sorry forget I ever said that" Jude panicked

"No I would love to go on a date with you the question just took me by surprise I had no idea you still felt that way about me" I said

"Wait, still you knew I had feelings on you" he said

"Yeah you weren't exactly subtle a few years ago but now you are definitely better at hiding your feelings I had no idea you still liked me" I explained

We laughed about it before actually planning our date after texting our parents to make sure they'd be willing to take us and make the reservation at the restaurant we wanted to go to for us as we aren't actually old enough to do that. On the way home from the park I couldn't stop smiling thinking about going on a date with Jude after all these years of friendship and feelings on both sides but never at the same time. When we got to my house Jude grabbed my hand and leaned in to kiss my cheek which made me blush like I've never blushed before but it felt right being with Jude in this way.

19 years old

I'd have never guessed that the airport would be so busy on Valentine's Day but I guess it makes sense with people going away or going to visit long distance partners which is what I'm doing so I guess I'm part of the problem. Since Jude went to Germany our relationship has changed quite a lot but we are still just as happy as before. Originally I was supposed to move with him and join Dortmund's women's team but I tore my acl over a year ago and haven't been able to play again since so instead I opted to go to university instead. Last year we couldn't be together to celebrate so we had a date over FaceTime but this year I'm surprising Jude as he has no idea I'm coming. With the help of some of his teammates who I knew well from coming to visit as much as I can I've planned dinner at a nice restaurant and then we are going to a show at a nearby theatre but most importantly I'm going to Jude's apartment to wait for him to come home from training to surprise him with it all.

My flight landed a bit late but I got through the airport quickly so I managed to get to the apartment with about half an hour to spare before Jude is due home. I spent my time freshening up a bit and setting out the presents I got him on the coffee table. When I heard him opening the door I got up and ran to hide somewhere to really make it a surprise. He came in and saw what I'd left for him on the coffee table and started to read the card which is when I came out from the room I was hiding in and snuck up until I could sit next to him. I managed to make him jump then he just stared at me and didn't say anything.

"What are you doing here?" He asked when he was able to speak

"I thought I'd come and surprise you as we didn't get to spend valentines together last year" I said

"I've missed you so much I'm so happy you're here" he said

"I'm here for a few days so we can spend plenty of time together but tonight I have things planned for us so we need to get ready in an hour" I said

"What have you planned?" He asked

"We are going to dinner at that restaurant that you said is really nice and then afterwards we are going to the local theatre to watch a show" I said

"That sounds amazing I'm so impressed you've managed to pull this off" he said

"I had a bit of help so hopefully it all goes to plan" I said

"As long as I get to be with you it doesn't matter what goes wrong I'll have a good time" he said

21 years old - present day

The last year or so has been a rollercoaster once Jude moved to Madrid and settled in I joined him to do my masters degree instead of staying home for another year. Because of all this last year we didn't celebrate valentines at all really as Jude was away for a game and I had exams but this year he's promised me he's going to go all out to make up for it. I have no classes today so Jude booked appointments for me to get my hair, nails and makeup done so all I have to do is pick an outfit when I get home which is already a lot but he made sure to make it clear that this is only the beginning.

My first appointment was my hair appointment so I just got a trim and got it styled then came makeup which I left up to the makeup artist as she definitely knows better than I do. I already looked so much better just after that but I still had one more appointment. Jude remembered where I like to go to get my nails done so he booked the appointment with the girl I always go to so we got to catch up as it's been a while since I've had someone other than me do my nails. Usually I have ideas of what I want to do but this time I didn't so she suggested some someone French tips so that's what we did. My nail girl is good but today she took extra care in making sure they were perfect and wouldn't let me leave until she was happy but it was so worth it.

After all of my appointments I felt really good about myself even more so when I got home and got dressed in the dress I decided I wanted to wear. Jude also put on his outfit which he looked so good in so I insisted that we take pictures together before we leave as we never both look this good one of us is always having a bad hair day so we have to take advantage of both feeling good about ourselves. After taking pictures Jude told me we needed to leave as there was a car waiting outside for us which was I was expecting to just be an Uber or something but it was actually a really fancy car. The driver greeted us and offered us glasses of champagne which is definitely not what I was expecting but Jude did say he was going to go all out so I should've seen it coming.

The car took us to a really nice restaurant which surprisingly wasn't too busy despite it being Valentine's Day. The place was definitely decked out for the occasion as there were candles on all the tables and lots of roses all around including a few rose petals on each table. Dinner was lovely all of the food was amazing and we had a great time but that wasn't all Jude had planned so we got back into the car which took us to this beautiful park in the city. As it was dark no one else was around so we walked around for a bit and then made our way to the big lake in the middle of it.

I was enjoying the view looking at the reflection of the moon in the water when I felt Jude's hand slip out of mine so I looked over to see if he was ok. When I did I saw him down on one knee holding a ring box. I really didn't expect Jude to propose tonight so I was shocked but also incredibly happy as he truly is the love of my life so getting married to him is something I've dreamed of a lot. Jude grabbed one of my hands while my other one went to wipe the tears that were falling down my face completely out of my control.

"Y/n since we met when we were little kids we've had a connection that I've never experienced with anyone else and when we started dating I realised I was the luckiest person on earth get to be with my best friend and soulmate now I think it's time to ask if you'll marry me and be my valentine forever" he said

"Y-yes of course I'll marry you" I managed to stutter out as he slid the ring on my finger

"Thank god I was so nervous you'd say no" he laughed

"Why would I ever say no" I said

"I don't know I was just worried you'd think this is too much or a bit corny to do it on Valentine's Day but this day has been important throughout our relationship so it felt fitting to get engaged on the day we had our first date all those years ago" he said

"Its perfect it means so much to me that you thought so much about it that's what I really care about" I said

"I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you" he said

"Me too" I smiled

#jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham imagines #jude bellingham imagine #jude bellingham #football imagine

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helvegen-s · 1 day ago

Text

point of no return | epilogue

index

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x driver!OC

Summary: Love and rivalry collide on the Formula 1 circuit as Ferrari's star drivers, Astrid and Charles, push the limits of their relationship alongside the boundaries of speed. Can their love survive the pressure, or will their ambition become their downfall?

WC: 2.2k

A/N: And with this, it’s finished! I really hope you’ve enjoyed the story and the characters. Honestly, I’ve loved writing it. I’m thinking about writing some extras about Charles and Astrid, so if you have any requests, I’ll be reading them :)

Big hug xx

The press room was packed. Journalists, cameras, and microphones lined up like soldiers in a battle of questions. Astrid Whitmore sat in the center, the Ferrari emblem still on her chest for the last time.

She took a deep breath before speaking.

"After much thought, I've decided it's time to close this chapter of my career. I'm leaving Ferrari and will be joining Red Bull next season."

The murmurs were immediate. It wasn’t a secret that her relationship with the team had grown tense, but hearing it from her own lips gave it a different weight. Astrid answered a few questions with the composure that had always defined her, carefully avoiding what everyone truly wanted to know��how Charles Leclerc felt about it.

When it was over, she walked out of the room with steady steps. She knew he would be there.

Charles was leaning against the wall, arms crossed over his chest. His expression was unreadable, but his eyes said too much. Astrid stopped in front of him, and for a moment, neither of them spoke.

"So, it's official," he murmured, a half-smile on his lips that didn’t quite reach his eyes.

"Yes," she replied, feeling her throat tighten.

Silence settled between them again. It was strange how, after everything they had lived through, there weren’t enough words to say goodbye.

"I hope you find what you're looking for," Charles finally said.

Astrid looked away for a second before meeting his gaze again.

"And I hope you keep fighting for what you deserve."

He let out a small laugh—bitter and sincere at the same time.

"We loved each other too much, but that's not enough, is it?"

Astrid shook her head.

"No," she whispered. "But that doesn’t mean it wasn’t worth it."

Charles nodded, his eyes memorizing every detail of her, as if trying to capture her one last time.

"Take care, Astrid."

"You too, Charles."

And with that, she walked away.

The following years bore witness to her greatness.

Astrid Whitmore conquered two world titles with Red Bull, cementing her legacy in Formula 1. But one day, when she felt she had given everything she had, she decided to say goodbye to single-seaters for good.

Rally found her when she was no longer searching for glory—only pure adrenaline, the thrill without the weight of expectations. There, among dirt roads and wild landscapes, she discovered there was something beyond winning and winning.

There was freedom.

And in that freedom, Astrid Whitmore found herself again.

Meanwhile, Charles Leclerc had become much more than just a Formula 1 driver.

He was a legend. Five consecutive titles with Ferrari, records shattered, epic races forever etched into motorsport history. He had become the man Monaco idolized, his name echoing with the same weight as the greatest champions of the Scuderia.

But amidst all that success, something had always lingered. A ghost that never truly disappeared.

It was Astrid.

He couldn’t count how many times he had searched for her name online over the past five years, how many times he had read about her victories in Rally, how many times he had found himself smiling at the screen as she lifted another trophy. He had always loved watching Astrid win, even if she was no longer by his side.

What he didn’t like was the feeling that followed. That tightness in his chest, that sharp pang of nostalgia reminding him that no matter how much he moved forward, a part of him had never stopped wanting her.

The years had passed, the seasons had piled up, yet Astrid remained there—lingering in his mind, in his memories. In every race where his instincts told him to turn his head and look for her in the paddock, only to remember she wasn’t there.

Now, for the first time in a long while, the FIA was hosting its annual gala in Monaco. The night he would be crowned, once again, as world champion. And in an unexpected twist, Astrid had decided to attend.

He found out days before, when he saw her name on the guest list. His reaction was immediate—he felt the ground beneath him shift. He couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like to see her after all this time. If he would still feel the same. If she would too.

The salty Mediterranean air mixed with the scent of freshly brewed coffee as Astrid walked through the streets of Monaco. It had been five years since she last set foot in this city, and yet, everything felt familiar. She had arrived a few days before the gala, taking the time to wander through streets filled with buried memories.

Monaco had been her home. She had loved living here, getting lost in its alleys, driving through its roads with the sea on one side and cliffs on the other. But what she remembered most was that, in every corner, there was a piece of Charles.

They had shared a life here. The memory of those years was imprinted on every restaurant they used to visit, every bench where they had sat talking about everything and nothing, every late-night stroll when the world’s noise faded, leaving only them.

Astrid didn’t regret moving on, finding her own path. But being here stirred something inside her she hadn’t expected.

She had no plan when she stepped into that café. She only wanted a break, a quiet moment before the gala.

What she didn’t expect was to find him there.

Charles.

He was sitting alone, a cup of coffee in his hand, a folded newspaper on the table. She hadn’t seen him in years, but the moment their eyes met, time collapsed in on itself.

He saw her too. And by the way his body tensed, she knew the surprise was mutual.

Astrid stood at the door, her heart a storm in her chest. She couldn’t help but take him in—the way the years had treated him. He looked older, more mature… and somehow even more handsome. But what hit her the hardest was the emotion in his eyes. The same one she had seen the last time they said goodbye.

Charles, on the other hand, felt like the air had been stolen from his lungs. There she was. So different, yet so much the same. Her hair a little longer, her posture more at ease, her eyes reflecting something new—peace.

She looked at peace.

Something inside him broke and healed at the same time.

"Hi," Astrid whispered.

Charles felt like a teenager again, words stuck in his throat, a foolish smile creeping onto his lips.

"Can I sit with you?" Astrid asked with a small smile, trying to ignore the avalanche of emotions crashing over her.

Charles nodded without thinking.

They sat across from each other, as if five years hadn’t passed.

At first, the conversation was light. They talked about racing, titles, how life had taken them down such different paths. Astrid told him about Rally, how much she enjoyed it, how she had found something in it she had never felt in Formula 1.

"It’s not just about winning, Charles. It’s not just about proving I’m the best. It’s… something more. I don’t know how to explain it."

He listened in silence, absorbing every word. He had always loved hearing her talk passionately about racing.

"You look happy," he finally said.

Astrid met his gaze and nodded.

"I am."

And it was true.

But then Charles lowered his eyes to his coffee and murmured,

"I always knew you’d find something to love as much as Formula 1. Though… I would have liked to be part of it."

Astrid felt her heart clench.

"We hurt each other… but we never stopped loving each other," she whispered.

Charles looked up at her, his gaze intense, stealing her breath.

"No," he answered. "And I don’t think we ever really stopped."

This time, the silence between them was different. Not uncomfortable, not painful. Just… full of possibilities.

Astrid leaned slightly forward, holding her cup with both hands.

"Are you scared?"

Charles let out a small laugh, a mix of disbelief and resignation.

"Yes."

"Me too."

And in that moment, they understood something they had perhaps always known: that what had once separated them no longer existed. That life had changed them, made them grow, and that maybe, just maybe, this time they could make it work.

Charles took a breath and, with a lopsided smile, said:

"Maybe this time..."

Astrid set her cup down on the saucer and held his gaze.

"Maybe."

And for the first time in seven years, the future no longer seemed uncertain.

Monaco had always had a special magic at night. The city lights reflected on the water, the echo of music floating in the air, the feeling that, in that small corner of the world, time stood still.

Astrid felt it that night more than ever.

The gala had been a whirlwind of greetings, conversations, and reunions. She was surprised by how much she had missed some people, how much affection she still felt for the family she had built in Formula 1. But even in the midst of it all, a part of her never stopped being aware of his presence.

Charles.

From across the room, in the middle of endless congratulations and impromptu interviews, he was looking for her too. Their eyes met so many times she lost count. At first, it was almost a game. A fleeting glance here, a lingering one there. But soon, it stopped being a game and became something more. A reminder that no matter how many years had passed, no matter how much their lives had changed… they still gravitated toward each other.

Now, back in her room, Astrid let out a sigh. She slipped off her heels, letting them drop to the floor with a soft thud, and collapsed onto the bed, her eyes fixed on the ceiling.

She couldn’t ignore it anymore.

She couldn’t ignore how her heart had raced when she saw him at the café. How her stomach tightened every time she caught him looking at her at the gala. How, despite everything, he was still Charles.

She turned on her phone and unlocked it without thinking too much. Her thumb hovered over the screen for a second before she finally typed:

To: Charles"Congratulations, champion. It’s been an incredible night for you."

It wasn’t enough. It was what anyone else would say. And Charles had never been just anyone to her.

She deleted the message.

She took a deep breath. Closed her eyes for a moment. Then she typed again.

To: Charles"I can’t remember the last time we spent a night in the same place without talking. It feels strange. Good night, Charles."

She hesitated for a moment, her thumb hovering over the send button. It wasn’t a groundbreaking message. It didn’t promise anything. It didn’t ask for anything.

But it was a first step.

A bridge between yesterday and tomorrow.

She sent it before she could regret it.

The phone vibrated on the nightstand. Charles wasn’t expecting any messages at that hour. His fingers, almost instinctively, reached for the device.

When he saw her name on the screen, his heart skipped a beat.

For a moment, he did nothing. He just stared at the message, allowing himself to feel everything that came with it.

"I can’t remember the last time we spent a night in the same place without talking. It feels strange. Good night, Charles."

He closed his eyes and let out a soft laugh. Of course it felt strange. All night, he had felt her close and, at the same time, out of reach. All night, his mind had drifted between the present and the past, between the urge to go to her and the fear of crossing a line they maybe shouldn’t cross.

But now, this.

A message.

Astrid had been the one to send it, the one to leave the door slightly open. And Charles wasn’t the kind of man to let an opportunity like that slip away.

He sat up in bed, leaning his back against the headboard. His fingers moved across the screen with more confidence than he actually felt.

To: Astrid"You’re right. It feels strange."

He paused. Then added:

"I don’t think we’ve ever avoided each other this much."

And he sent the message.

Just seconds later, his phone vibrated again.

Astrid:"I don’t think we’ve avoided it, Charles."

He frowned, his thumb tapping lightly against the screen.

Charles:"No? Then what have we done?"

Astrid took longer to reply this time. Charles imagined she was debating between many possible answers. And when it finally arrived, he knew he hadn’t been wrong.

Astrid:"We’ve been waiting."

Charles read it several times. His lips curled into a silent smile. Because yes, she was right.

They had waited.

To see if time would wear down what they felt. To see if the other would make the first move. To see if, after everything, there was still something left between them.

And the answer was obvious.

Charles:"And now?"

He waited. Seconds, then a minute. Until the screen lit up again.

Astrid:"Now I don’t want to wait anymore."

Charles let the phone fall onto the bed and ran a hand over his face. His smile widened, accompanied by a sigh he wasn’t sure was relief, excitement, or simple acceptance.

After years, after so many stolen glances and unspoken words, they had finally said what truly mattered.

And for the first time in a long time, the future felt like something they could write together.

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