#around that time I developed some autistic traits in my personality :/

[hammill-goes-fogwalking]

sympathy for the outcasts <3

[tealvenetianmask]

Why Stolas's Story Is a Neurodivergent Story

And what that means for what's ahead.

Like a lot of fans, I see Stolas as autistic. This isn't a diagnosis post. But yes, something something special interests, dinosaur arms, persistent difficulty fitting in with his own social class, anxiety about social situations, frequent difficulty reading people and/or noticing others' emotions (especially when caught up in his own thoughts), masking, etc. etc. etc.

I want to talk about how Stolas's character arc tells a really well written (and potentially very uplifting) story about what it's like to be neurodivergent.

So what would be in my ideal neurodivergent story? Well I'd rather stay away from true utopia and have it reflect what it feels like to be neurodivergent in society today. So the character would struggle, not because their traits are bad, but because society isn't built for them. As the story progresses, the character might find happiness in unexpected ways and begin to look beyond society's rigid expectations for what a "good life" looks like. And then, hopefully, after some twists and turns, this character reaches a kind of self-acceptance where they are more themselves than ever, proud of who they are, and maybe even able to help change their society for the better.

Stolas's character arc IS this story.

Act 1: It's hard trying to fit into a neurotypical world.

Stolas is taught to mask his true emotions and follow strict social expectations as a child. He isn't living in just ANY neurotypical culture. The Goetia are old and set in their ways, and have rigid expectations for what one does and does not do. He's playing the social game on "hard mode" from the beginning.

I think one thing that helps make Stolas high masking is the way in which his special interests are socially acceptable within his social sphere. Stars and plants? Books? Well he's a nerd, and no one wants to be his friend, but of course a guy with his particular destiny-assigned-in-childhood would like things like that.

Stolas develops a few different types of masks. One is the "I'm fine" mask where he pretends not to be emotionally affected by what's going on around him.

The other is this sort of "powerful" mask. A character who is in control of everything and plays into his society's ideas of how a Goetia should interact with the rest of the world. It usually means acting demeaning toward Blitz in order to preserve the facade of what a powerful prince of Hell is supposed to be. And he's conscious of putting on an act when he uses it.

But anyway, the masks cover up a person who is deeply unhappy in his prescribed role and doing his best to act correctly for others . . . his father's expectations and then his daughter's wellbeing, instead of for himself. I like that HB has him STILL not fit in among the Goetia despite his best efforts. It's an experience that a lot of neurodivergent people know too well.

By the way, I LOVE how Mastermind brings us Stolas doing something truly subversive with this "powerful" mask, playing into his society's expectations in order to, in a small way, undermine their power. BUT that's me getting ahead of myself.

Act 2: The neurodivergent character learns that there are other ways to be.

I think that Stolas has been dipping his talons into this part of his story for two seasons now but has been hesitant to envision himself as anything but a prince of hell. We're going to see him fully engulfed in working through these questions in Season 3 because of his banishment.

Blitz is of course the major catalyst for Stolas questioning his commitment to conformity and acting outright rebellious at times.

I think it's neat that Blitz is so clearly neurodivergent himself. We tend to find each other . . . if you're reading this and are neurodivergent, take a look at your closest friends. And these two share a kind of chemistry and appreciation for one another that most of Hell seems not to see in them.

BUT until he's banished, Stolas doesn't really reach for a situation where he doesn't need to act out his prescribed role. Even when he pursues a relationship with Blitz in earnest, he does so with the expectation that he'll somehow balance this relationship with satisfying the expectations of his upper-class peers.

Act 3: Radical Self-Acceptance?? Hopefully!

Now we can only speculate.

I think that despite realizing that he wants something else, Stolas still fundamentally believes that something is wrong with him. He doesn't understand yet that his enthusiasm for his interests and his emotiveness, for instance, are part of what makes him wonderful. He doesn't see yet that being different might even help him change a society that is deeply flawed.

I can't wait to see Stolas truly have fun in Imp City, and do things there that he's truly proud of.

Whatever happens with his literal powers, he might figure out that he's most powerful when he doesn't act like a "powerful prince" but instead acts like himself and proudly questions his society.

And there's a lot of "The Circus" in this post because @akirathedramaqueen and I had a major brainstorm while we were rewatching that episode. More new ideas about old material to come soon hopefully!

This post is a follow-up on this literal fever ramble from yesterday about Blitz as a neurodivergent character. And yes, I think neurodivergent stories map onto queer stories quite nicely.

[lett-them-eatt-cake]

Why I think Elvis may have been autistic

First of all, the reason why I am making this post is because @iloveelvis2 has asked for more insight into why I believe Elvis may have been autistic.

Disclaimer: I just want to start out by saying that I am not a doctor or a psychiatrist or any kind of professional. Nor am I definitively saying that Elvis was autistic. We cannot diagnose someone who is not here and who cannot speak for themselves. This post is purely based off of my own personal opinions, lived experiences, and things that I have read about Elvis' life and personality. I am autistic and I also grew up with an autistic sister and father, thus I am using my own lived experiences as a reference point. Remember that autism is a wide-ranging spectrum and can present itself differently in different people, with different symptoms. There is no one lived experience of autism.

This might be a complete mess, but now I am going to list some of the traits that Elvis displayed that leads me to believe he possibly could have been autistic. So here we go.

Stuttering: It is very common for autistic people to have some sort of speech impediment or stutter. We do know that Elvis suffered from having a stutter, especially when he was younger, but it was something he carried with him throughout his life. Elvis himself said in an interview in 1956 that he stuttered when he got excited and had a hard time saying words that started with the letters "w" and "i."

Maintaining a sense of safety, familiarity, and security: Autistic people usually don't like change. We tend to like familiarity and have repetitive behaviors. We don't like outside forces disrupting or coming into our little bubbles. Elvis was the same way. It is well known that Elvis was extremely shy growing up and had trouble making friends. When he got older and as he became famous, he made sure to surround himself with his own group of loyal friends, and quite literally created his own little world and bubble with the famous "Memphis Mafia." These guys gave Elvis a sense of security, safety, and familiarity amid the chaos of his fame. While they were very much needed to help Elvis and provide him with protection for obvious reasons, they also became his entire world. So much so that I have heard countless actors and actresses who worked on Elvis' movies say that it was hard to get to Elvis because his guys were always around him. It was clearly very hard for E to let new people into his life at times, just as it was hard for him to let go of some of the people in his circle who were using him. Autistic people tend to be manipulated easily and taken advantage of by others who see them as an easy target and in spite of it we still keep these people around because we don't like confrontation and don't want to mess with the bubbles we have created. And I think that is exactly what Elvis did in some ways with the Memphis Mafia and the Colonel. Even if he was being taken advantage of, he not only wanted to remain loyal to them, but I think he felt he also would have been lost without them and the transition would have been highly difficult for him.

Repetitive behaviors: This sort of falls hand in hand with number 2. Autistic people usually do not like change and will often develop repetitive behaviors as a way of comforting themselves. One way I can see Elvis having repetitive behaviors is in his eating habits. I have heard countless friends of Elvis talk about how he was not adventurous with his taste (which is common in a lot of autistic people) and that he mainly stuck to the same southern foods he always ate. Yes, this is in part because of how he was raised but he also appeared to have eating cycles. I believe it was Sonny West who talked about a certain food combination Elvis ate repeatedly while he was touring in 1956, and during the last couple years of his life, he claimed that Elvis started "eating like 56' again." Showing that Elvis clearly went through repetitive food cycles. Not only to mention those peanut butter and banana sandwiches he loved to eat that seemed to provide him with so much comfort. Elvis was also known to rewatch movies over and over again. So much so that he would memorize the script and could repeat the dialogue over. It was claimed that he watched Monty Python and the Holy Grail around 35 times and knew every line! He also repeatedly listened to the speeches of MLK Jr. and could recite them back.

Regulating emotions: Most autistic people have problems regulating their emotions and Elvis was clearly the same way. He was highly impulsive and all over the place. His friends and family have talked about how his emotions would swing up and down and if he was upset or mad, they would make sure to stay away from him. Elvis was also known to get upset and fire people, only to rehire them after he cooled back down again.

Sensory issues: A lot of autistic people have sensory issues (including myself, it is an absolute hell). Elvis clearly showed signs of having sensory issues. For example, we know that he hated the smell of fish so bad that he banned fish from Graceland. He also had to have his room and hotel rooms at a certain temperature, usually very cold. There are several instances of him leaving and changing hotels because his room was not as cold as he wanted it to be. He also had a sensitivity to light. But that one is probably due more to his glaucoma in his eyes. But he also had problems with certain textures in food and had to have his meals prepared a specific way in order for him to eat it. For example, he only wanted to eat bacon and eggs if they were practically burned to a crisp. He also ate other specific combinations of food that many people would normally find repulsive.

Sleeping: Like many autistic people, throughout his life, Elvis had problems sleeping. He used to take sleeping pills in order to sleep, and his sleep patterns were not normal, as he was very nocturnal. now this in part was due to his lifestyle, but a lot of autistic people are naturally very nocturnal.

Stimming: Autistic people usually need to stim or fidget to help calm their nerves. Elvis was the same way. He was always moving and fidgeting, and he even said that he took up smoking because it was something he could do with his hands because he couldn't keep still.

Anxiety and digestion: A lot of autistic people have really bad anxiety and thus many autistic people suffer with massive digestion issues. While there are a lot of various medical reasons that could be at play, it is well known that Elvis had problems with his digestion throughout his entire life.

Special interests: Autistic people are well known for having special interests. Things we are interested in that we tend to become obsessive over. We love to immerse ourselves in these special interests and Elvis was no different. Elvis had many different special interests. He loved reading, religion/the Bible, spirituality, karate, football, Captain Marvel Jr., and he even immersed himself in those worlds. He incorporated his love of karate into his performances, had some of his jumpsuits designed after his favorite comic superhero, Captain Marvel Jr., even used Captain Marvel Jr.'s lightning symbol as the symbol for his TCB logo. His friends also said that he always watched football on TV wearing a football helmet because he wanted an immersive experience.

Attention to detail and hyper focus: A lot of autistic people are known for their attention to detail and hyperfocus. Their ability to tune into something, especially if it's something they love. I think we can apply this to Elvis and his music. Yes, Elvis was passionate about music, but he also had an uncanny ability to be able to listen to music and know precisely just how to arrange it. I have heard several members of his friends and band mates talk about how, despite the fact that Elvis never learned how to read music, he had an ear for arranging the music and was so hyper focused that he could come up with amazing music arrangements on the spot. He was also known for learning entire songs after hearing them only once.

Final thoughts:

Wow that was way longer than I intended it to be! I hope it's not too much of a rambling mess. Anyway, those are just some of the reasons why I believe Elvis could have been autistic. There are more reasons I could list but this post would turn into a book, and I would need to do more research for that. I just want to close by restating that all of this is just my own personal opinion and that we cannot and should not diagnose people we don't personally know, especially famous people who are no longer alive. Whether or not Elvis was on the spectrum, we will never know for sure. But I hope this post gets you thinking about the ways we view autism in our society today and how our expectations of what autism looks and acts like has changed as time has gone on. The possibility of Elvis Presley, the "king of rock n roll" being autistic does a wonderful job of challenging societies definition of what it means to be autistic. There has been such a stigma around autism, but the thought that Elvis himself could have possibly been a member of our community brings me a sense of comfort.

[sailorscout93]

Okay attempt number 2 at posting why I personally think Galinda Upland is a high masking AuDHD person after I saw a post pegging Elphaba as Autisitic and Galinda as ADHD:

See under the cut

1. She’s very clearly high energy/hyperactive, always busy, never stops talking, the way she talks it seems like that’s how her brain works, just running and running constantly.

2. She speaks what’s on her mind without thinking about how what she says may affect those around her. “You’re green!” It very much gives me “If you’re from Africa why are you white?” From Mean Girls vibes. (And yes, I do think Karen Smith is autistic too lol)

3. She has 2 special interests: being Popular and sorcery. I mean, aside from just being a huge gay flamingo mating dance, Popular also feels like a giant infodumping session of Galinda onto Elphie. She’s sharing all the knowledge she has on one of her favorite topics. The works she puts in to following her hearts desire to be a sorceress, saying how it’s her hearts desire. She would do anything to be able to do magic and I personally think she has the knowledge behind it, even if she doesn’t have the magic ability in her in the way Madame Morrible is looking for. She recognizes that Elphaba was the one who did the magic in the courtyard at Shiz and she begs Elphaba to share how she did it, even though she claims to loathe her. She thinks Elphaba knows something about her special interest that she doesn’t so she MUST find out!

4. I know the suitcases and trunks all her stuff is in is partially because of the lack of closet space in the dorm room but while it seems like everything has its place, drawers are labeled, etc… it’s still very cluttered. She just has SO. MUCH. STUFF. A little bit of hoarding. She cannot bear to get rid of anything because what if she needs it one day?! (I.E. the hat her grandmother made her!)

5. Speaking of the hat. I don’t think she actually hates it. It may not be her style, but her grandma made it for her! When Pfannee pulled the hat out and he and ShenShen started hating on it and Galinda turned around, it took her a moment to read her friend’s tones. You can see for a second her expression looks neutral but contemplative when she’s looking at Pfannee before it changes and she starts to hate on the hat. She had to take a second to read and process her friend’s tone before she responded so she could have the correct reaction her friends were expecting from her.

6. The ‘toss toss’ and ‘leg’ things are both stims. You cannot change my mind.

7. Why is she so high masking? Because her momsie and popsicle conditioned her to hide any trait of hers that could seen as “undesirable” or “unladylike”. She’s Galinda Upland of the Upper Uplands after all! She has a reputation to live up to!

8. After the Ozdust Ballroom night when she and Elphie become friends, she quickly becomes attached to her. Elphie becomes her “safe person” and she develops an attachment to her that I see frequently in neurodiverse people. She always wants to be around her and she is always holding her hand and touching her because she’s so comfortable with Elphaba. She finally has someone she can unmask around.

9. Speaking of Elphie…. Galinda shows some HEAVY Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria in the deleted scene “Elphaba’s Promise”. She is sad and hurt, not that Elphie and Fiyero were doing something without her, but that Elphie “chose” Fiyero to help her rescue the cub, not Galinda. “If you needed someone, you could’ve picked me!” Breaks my heart every time!

10. She seems to have a little bit of rigid thinking when it comes to Dr. Dillamond not being able to pronounce her name. She seems to think if she just keeps repeating the correct way to say it, he’ll eventually get it and not understanding that he’s physically not capable of pronouncing her name correctly because of his lack of upper front teeth, even when it’s explained to her.

11. This last one is very much a stretch (pun not originally intended this time lol) but I’m putting it in too, hypermobility issues are a very high comorbidity with autism and when she’s dancing around during Popular she does a high kick. Could it just be athleticism? Maybe. Could it be a hypermobility thing? Also maybe.

[cripplecharacters]

Hello, I'm writing a character that is autistic. I'm autistic and white (afab) and my character is black (amab), can I use my own experience with autism as a "draftc for his character? If not, what can I do to make the writing feel correct/original?

(sry if I made any grammar mistakes, I'm not a native speaker)

Hi asker,

Ultimately, autism is both race- and sex- and gender- neutral. Symptoms and traits are not going to vary drastically because of any of the above things.

So yes, you can use your own experience as a basis for your character. What you'd need to pay more attention to is the responses of other people to your character and the culture that they're being raised in.

For example, black disabled people are treated especially heinously by law enforcement, so if you were going to include anything about that, a little black kid might be taught as much as possible by his family to be careful around cops and develop a script and to not stim around them. Masking and not stimming in a case like this isn't a case of hiding your true self, it's about protecting your life and safety. And yet, this doesn't actually have anything to do with this character's autism being any different than a little white boy his age. Just that it is treated differently.

And, like any character of color, the only way to make them isn't just to make them live the same life culturally than a white person and then change the color of their skin. Researching about their culture and including bits of that in their life is important – things like food, values, hairstyles, cultural events, holidays, and such.

I want to add that the assigned genders of your characters don't matter as much as you think they might. I know it's common to refer to 'female/girl autism' on the internet as its own separate beast, but there isn't really a material difference in symptoms and traits. Some traits will be seen differently socially by others, like with race, and people might be treated differently depending on their sex about how they behave, but the behaviors themselves are not divided nicely on a gender line or anything like that. That misconception, really, is just born from misogyny, sexism, and societal expectations, not from autism itself being different.

Hope this helps,

mod sparrow

Hello,

mod Sparrow covered the actual question, so I'll mention the AGAB part.

There is no sexual dimorphism related to hormones, genitals, or chromosomes in autism. The severity of a person's symptoms or how they experience them is unrelated to any kind of sex characteristic, nor to a past decision made on the basis of at-the-time appearance of the person's external genitals, which is what AGAB is.

The "girl/boy autism" is a sexist dichotomy that is completely made up and presents girls as inherently less disabled by their autism. It erases the severely disabled girls and women who do have autism and shows "girl autism" as more manageable and pro-social than "boy autism" which is impossible to control and anti-social. That's nonsense and the same kind of erasure of women as in every other minority.

The only real difference that is based on gender is how it's socially treated by others, just like mod Sparrow mentioned. Men's autistic symptoms are generally considered more acceptable than they would be if they belonged to a woman, even if the symptom is exactly the same. If a man shows autistic tendencies, he can be considered "intriguing and unique", but if a woman did the same, she would be "off-putting and weird".

This, however, obviously isn't based on what the person's AGAB was. A transgender woman's autistic behavior won't be seen the same way a cisgender man's behavior would be. It will in fact put her under more scrutiny than a cis woman would be under, not less. AGAB is a past event that serves no function in this question, nor in most contexts. AGAB doesn't answer for gender, presentation, chromosomes, hormone dominance, organs, functionality of these organs, or anything else other than what someone arbitrarily said about a newborn. Categorizing people based on what gender they were assigned at birth - rather than any present characteristic - is bioessentialism.

I know this is not an answer to the ask, but please question what a past evaluation of the character's genitals would inform here that their actual gender wouldn't.

mod Sasza

[rubykgrant]

I made some adjustments to the colors/added a few more details, so here they are again! My Super Hero kids, that I first came up with a LONG time ago with my best friend, way back in middle school. I started with 5 characters... which turned into 7, and because I kept on going, that turned into two teams of 7 characters! A lot has changed over the years, but the "core" concept of the characters was always there. The things I've updated genuinely feel RIGHT, like this is who the characters were always supposed to be. (I also added descriptions to the images)

From left to right-

Casual; Lisa West, Bobby Gold, Ella Noble, Deke Garden, Rodney Bright, Cloe Chance, Min Shirabe

Heroes; SuperNova, Sunburst, Ferris, Rosewood, Vivid, Spellbound, Lyric

The basic plot of their story is two groups of kids begin developing super powers, and naturally want to start being heroes and villains about it (though, the "villain" kids aren't "evil", just little jerks/brats/punks who have some angst to work through). In the larger scheme of things, there is a lot of insidious background problems the kids slowly become aware of, and they all start working together to deal with it (a slow realization that the world they live in, while seemingly "normal", is actually recovered from some kind of post-apocalyptic event, and the concept that "heroes" have been used as tools or weapons in the past becomes clear. it is an unfair responsibility, but the kids are determined to change the system that the adults around them use to destroy each other... also, they have plenty of fun shenanigans, too. these are kids with super powers after all~)

Lisa/SuperNova's powers are enhanced strength/durability, flight, and the ability to control/conjure flames (she can also concentrate fire into intense heat-blasts). Personality traits; compassionate and courageous, sarcastic sense of humor, casually rebellious attitude. She is 16 (sophomore, held-back 1 year in 6th grade), her best subjects are history and art (crafting/woodwork), but she struggles in math. Lisa plays on her school's soccer team, and has taken several martial arts classes. She also enjoys cooking/baking, and horror movies. Lisa is autistic. Background; Native American Hopi/Norwegian/Columbian (dad's side), Inuk and Irish (mom's side). Gender/sexuality; nonbinary (she/her), bisexual, demisexual

Bobby/Sunburst initially thinks he only has powers after stopping an experiment that was trying to recreate what SuperNova can do, thus giving him similar abilities (his REAL power is being able to absorb energy, and that lets him copy/combine/enhance other powers), less of a strength-boost, but he can also conjure/create fire, and is eventually able to fly. Personality traits; conscientious and ambitious, modest, eager to help, curious. He is 12, a child prodigy (placed in 7th grade, but takes a few advanced classes) who excels at science/chemistry/physics. He's also just a kid who enjoys playing video games/tabletop RPGs, skateboarding, and collecting comics. Bobby is autistic. Background; he is Black, Kenyan and Greek (mom's side), Dominican and German (dad's side). Gender/sexuality; cis (he/him), heterosexual

Ella/Ferris can control metal, moving it, liquefying and reshaping it, and manipulating magnetic fields. Personality traits; talkative, insightful, calm and clever, witty and off-beat humor. Ella is 14 (skipped ahead to be a sophomore), a genius with electronics/machines (likes to collect vintage/out-dated devices and up-grade them), doesn't seem like she takes things seriously but is totally reliable, and is a big fan of sci-fi literature. She is always good for a philosophical conversation. While she isn't interested in being the center of attention, she isn't shy either. Ella is autistic. Background; she is Black, South African/Italian (dad's side), Ethiopian/Spanish/French (mom's side). Gender/exuality; transgender girl (she/her), heterosexual

Deke/Rosewood has nature powers, connected to plants and flowers (making them move or rapidly grow to great sizes), also able to decay/regenerate plant life. Personality traits; likes to make people laugh, mellow and easy-going, quietly sensitive. Deke is 15, a sophomore in school. Deke's interests are earth sciences, including botany and ecology, and cares a lot about the environment (they're family has a small farm and ranch). Sometimes seems like a daydreamer in class, but is actually very smart. Deke also likes to collect different scented candles/incense, and keeps a first-aid kit handy for emergencies. Deke was injured as a child, resulting in an amputation below the left knee (has a prosthetic leg, and also uses other mobility aids when needed). Deke is dyslexic. Background; Irish (dad's side), Jewish Ashkenazi/Romani (mom's side). Gender/sexuality; nonbinary (he/they), bisexual

Rodney/Vivid creates solid forms of colorful glowing light, using it as shields for defense, or an energy blast as an attack (he can also turn himself/other people/objects invisible by reflecting light, but have to stay still), and as solid surfaces for movement. Personality traits; soft-spoken, kind and clever, a little socially awkward. Rodney is 14, and a sophomore in school (previously went to a private school that was too competitive and harsh). Rodney is good in most academic subjects, and also a very creative person, with an interest in surreal/abstract art (both whimsical and horror), working with different mediums (painting/sculpture). He's somebody who likes to have lots of little snacks (and is happy to share). Rodney has anxiety. Background; Rodney is Native American Lakota, Ogala (mom's side), Sicangu (dad's side). Gender/sexuality; cis (he/him), gay

Cloe/Spellbound is a witch with magical powers (associated with darkness/night and the moon), but she is also capable of telepathy/telekinesis. Personality traits; withdrawn and cynical, determined, thoughtful. Cloe is 15, a sophomore (previously doing independent study after leaving a school where she was bullied). Cloe has spent a lot of time alone, and struggles to be comfortable around others, but slowly opens up (despite being argumentative, she's also very sympathetic toward other people). She likes fantasy/sci-fi/horror books, and enjoys reading about the history of folklore/mythology. Cloe is a little afraid of deep water (generally doesn't like to swim without something to float with), and isn't comfortable with touching/contact with anybody outside of her family/friend group. Craves extra sour candy. Cloe is autistic. Background; Cloe is adopted, raised in London. Both her adoptive and biological family are English, Scottish/Welsh (biological dad's side), Romanian/Polish (biological mom's side). Gender/sexuality; cis (she/her), asexual

Min/Lyric has music/sound themed abilities, she can let out a scream so loud it creates a sonic-boom, identify/mimic any sound or voice, and uses "magical musical energy" to make solid objects (usually in the form of musical instruments, for emphasis). Personality traits; self-assured, welcoming and friendly, loyal, optimistic and energetic. Min is 14, a freshman at school. Her talents are music and fashion, but she also takes gymnastics and ballet. She has studied classical music (with a broad interest in different genres, and contemporary music), and participates in a lot of talent shows/chorus groups/plays. Min is outwardly a social-butterfly, but isn't worried about fickle/fleeting popularity. Min is plural (DID), and has synesthesia. Background; Min's family is Asian American, Japanese (dad's side), Chinese (mom's side). Gender/Sexuality; cis (she/her), pansexual, asexual, polyamorous

[majka626]

A few people asked me to explain my standing on the theory "Homura being autistic" so I will try to bring up some significant points.

Of course given the lack of background for Homura's personal life and behavior (esp prior becoming a MG), you can take this with grain of salt, based primarily on my own autistic traits I can relate to hers, but also everything I've studied about autism from other autistic people themselves.

For the start, even the main reason Homura is my favorite character of all media is that for the first time, I found a character who resembles my autistic traits, personality and struggles (social, emotional, health). She made me feel understood even though she's fictional.

Now to the point;

-I'd start with a question I ask myself: What exactly is 'neurotypical' about her?

The girl is clearly dissociated with reality and lives in a completely different world with different rules than other people or girls her age. She's basically a "black sheep" and an outcast who doesn’t fit in. She also isn’t dwelling on the laws and rules (which I also found out to be common among autistic people who live by their own rules and have lack of understanding for social norms).

Here I talk about her social standing. It's usual for autistic people (including myself) to struggle socially, be shy, socially awkward and anxious, avoid socialization, bad at communication, etc. From what we could see about Homura from the start and given the brief informations on the drama CD or games) that I've heard, she has never socialized - even though the main reason was her health condition she's been born with, due to which she spent a lot of time and childhood in a hospital and isolated from other kids (if I remember right, some of the official material has extended her heart issues and hospital stay). It's true we could easily characterize this as an experiences that led to trauma alone than as something to do with autism, if we'd end it just there.

However, that doesn’t change the fact she lacks social skills, even if trauma partially played a part on it. Plus, autistic people are just generaly more prone to develop a trauma and mental issues in situations they weren't emotionally prepared for.

It's easy to see she was/ is completely terrified or discouraged of the idea of socializing and she's really.. not the best at communicating neither. Then there are the particular details in her communication, like being too blunt, in ways that are interpreted as rude.

Not to mention, she tried so many times and ways, yet she never really found the right way to communicate with others about the issues. Until she felt like giving up.

In summary, her social situation is unquestionably heavily "autism coded".

Next point, her famous love for Madoka. While her love is genuine and real, everyone is well aware it's "obsessive". And you know what else it reminds me of? A hyperfixation. Yes, autistic people can hyperfixate on another person too. Loving someone so much that everything else has little to no meaning in life, not being able to separate that person (or thing) from own mind or struggle to stay separated, the lengths she's able to go for her love, when one based their entire existence and purpose around that person because life without them just "isn’t possible", that's a clear symptom of a severe co-dependence and hyperfixation (the main thing I relate with as a traumatized autistic person myself, who simply can not live without a hyperfixation or a person who lawfully takes care of me and nothing else in life can make me happy and content). Then again, I feel like people ignore why has Homura fall in love with Madoka in the first place and narrow it down to just being gay, even though it wasn’t related with a sexual/ romantic attraction from the start. Homura (just like Madoka) is someone with a lot of self-esteem issues and a good deal of trauma before she even became MG. She felt trapped even by her physical condition (afterall, she didn’t know what it's like to live in a healthy body, therefore felt worthless). She didn’t really *feel* understood and respected by others. Until she met Madoka. Feeling Madoka's sincere kindness and consideration to her feelings, then seeing her in a heroic action to save her life, the first feelings she developed towards her were gratitude and admiration. Madoka has became her idol than anything at first. But with given experiences, the admiration has soon evolved into an obsession, eventually a love at the same time.

In my book at least it's a clear hyperfixation, which is another trait common for autism.

I can eventually add every new details each time they come to mind, or if anyone reading this has something to add as an autism trait I forgot, feel free, I'm interested!

For now these are the most explaining examples I could think of off the top of my mind, and of course it's ok to disagree, especially with given context of her immense trauma that can extremely remind of autism because we didn’t know her prior her trauma (I personally think she's always been going through trauma due to her health issues & isolation and never had a happy life, but that's rather subjective and based on the little I've heard and her behavior).

[walkingstackofbooks]

Great response to that salty Jezri ask - but I'll be honest, I think it's funny when Jezri fans charge that a lack of interest in the ship is misogyny. Most people I've known outside the Internet who have watched DS9 are not into shipping and fandom at all, and they also think the Julian/Ezri romance was really half-assed and the actors didn't have much chemistry. You don't have to be a Garashir fan to feel that way. And Ezri was a character with a lot of potential where the writers often failed to deliver on that potential, one of the ways being in tying up so much of her storylines in the question of which of these three guys who was into Jadzia she is going to pick... There is misogyny in slash fandom, but along with how ridiculous it is to be jumpy about someone not writing your preferred character as the focus in ONE fanfic, I think people often accuse slash fiction writers when the real problem is a show itself that was underinvested in its female characters. DS9 did at least give Kira one of its strongest character arcs, but other than that it tended to sell the women rather short and define them around their romances. Fanfiction writers who would prefer to focus on Julian or Garak (who was better developed as a character than either Dax despite not even being a series regular! and I say this as a Jadzia stan myself) are responding to what the show gave us more than anything.

I'm someone who has often really enjoyed what the fandom has done with Ezri, and has written a lot about her in my own fanfic. But I think some people don't want to acknowledge how much it's been the fandom doing that work, not the original show. (Also, as I said in replies, the point of your fic seemed to be about the issues with Jezri - and most of it was from Ezri's perspective? Weird place to mention that it was "undermining" her. Female characters not being perfect people is not "undermining" them, and honestly, the tendency to put women on a pedestal is not really any more sexist than demonizing them. But her just not being attracted to the "best" version of Julian Bashir doesn't even make her that terrible of a person in my opinion? She wants someone who she can rescue - okay that defines a lot of people. And I love loquacious hyperfixation Julian but as someone who shares those traits with him, I also know they can be irritating to a lot of people. Can't say I've never been irritated by a fellow autistic people going on about something I don't personally care about, even!)

I mean, I LOVE Jezri. I think it's really cute, I think they're adorable friends and it makes total sense they're tumbling into each other's arms - I don't think they're a made-to-last romance, but what they have is very sweet, and I always got the feeling that Julian was one of her friends who most saw her as Ezri, and not as Jadzia. I don't get the "they don't have chemistry" thing, because they made each other laugh, and were good at comforting each other, and I just love them.

(Misogyny of wrapping all her storylines up in "who's she gonna pick?" though - yeaaaa. I hate that Jezri happens because of that. Gah.)

Yeah, there's always going to be that criticism. I mean, I do think it's partially valid - there are a whole bunch of fanfics that do treat Ezri terribly to get her out of the way of the ship. But at the same time, most of those do skew older in writing date - and if that's what you have a problem with, make your own post, right?

Though, tbh, idk what their problem was. I've realised I wrote a different fic where Julian breaks down about his confused feelings for an off-screen Ezri that it could have been about. I've made a number of headcanon-y posts about Ezri being aro and not realising and having trouble interpreting Jadzia's allo feelings through an aro lens, so it could also be good old-fashioned aphobia 🤷‍♀️ Or, you know, maybe they were just taking out their frustration at the lack of their ship in this fandom in a really bad way (I get it, but just block the Garashir tag for a couple of days when you're getting burnt out by it, y'know? 😅)

I dunno, it's a weird one. I mean, for one thing, all my fics to date - one promptfill aside - are gen, unless they're explicit darkfic. For another, I want to write angsty Julian-centred h/c, and what I like about Jezri is that it's sweet and fluffy, so even if I were writing romance I'd probably go somewhere else.

Sorry, this has definitely become a ramble, but thanks for the ask!

(Honestly, if it was that fic, the point of it wasn't even to say that Ezri was at fault for Julian's quieter side! It's only a short, rushed thing, so maybe fair enough if it comes across that way - but the main point was that Julian's been depressed for a very long time, and is still depressed, and it's not Ezri's fault for not noticing, because she's only known him as a quieter, more reserved guy... And hinting at endgame Mikoshir, too, sure, but that's never exclusive...)

[nova-reaper-universe]

I have an unpopular opinion about Steven Universe…

I think that he doesn’t even not have BPD because in my opinion, he is too young to be considered for a diagnosis, since teenagers (like Steven) are still developing their personality and also very emotional, this part is especially relevant for AUTISTIC TEENAGERS WITH TRAUMA! I also had a friend who got diagnosed with BPD at 14 and since I had a special interest in psychology I was like “yeah, that is not normal, they shouldn’t be considering that” and then a few months and a new psychiatrist go by and they get diagnosed with autism. There is also something I read on the National Institute of Health’s website concerning the diagnosis that cannot apply to Steven during the events of Future, that the symptoms of BPD are persistent for a year, because we do not know how much time has occurred nor do I think that Steven had persistent symptoms for a year, since this seemed like something unexpected to himself and everyone around him. It is also due to this fact that people under the age of 18 do not typically get diagnosed with BPD if the present the symptoms.

So, what is my argument here then? Steven has autism and a shitton of trauma (probably C-PTSD which one would think its inevitable for him considering the autism diagnosis, since its like 4 times more likely in autistic people than non-autistic people). He was also shown to be very emotional in the original series, but the emotions got more and more intense as Future went by (due to the C-PTSD), and he’s only 16, which would be a bit young to be diagnosing BPD. Also I see him as more consistently portraying the traits of autism throughout Future than BPD, and can provide some examples:

In the episode “Bluebird”, his tomato juice gets swapped for tomato soup, and Amethyst says “but you love tomato soup” but he is still mad about the incident (this may be due to his suspicion but it may also be due to the expectation of having tomato juice and being met with tomato soup, causing distress)

Bismuth Casual (yes, the whole episode) (could be A1 of DSM-5)

Adherence to routine (B2 of DSM-5) in the beginning of the episode “Snow Day”

Still watches Dogcopter (restricted interests, A1)

Episodes involving huge changes (resistance to change, another one from B2)

Therefore, due to the nature of BPD and Steven’s repeated behaviour throughout the series, I can say that I do not think he has BPD, but rather autism with C-PTSD.

[snakeautistic]

I love finding characters I can relate (/project onto) within media. There’s something so comforting about seeing yourself on screen. I end up headcanoning most of them to be in-line with my identities (lesbian, wasian, autistic) because they are literally me in my head!!

Anyway here’s a long ass list of my favorite characters and why I head canon them as autistic for fun!! If you have any others you’d like to add I’d love to hear them. (And please note this is just my interpretation, and highly based on my experience with autism. I’m not saying they’re definitely autistic or that all the traits I listed are the dsm-5 criteria or something.)

Princess Bubblgeum from adventure time:

This girl is peak evil scientist autistic. Her intense need for control, the way she carefully observes the citizens she created, an outsider to them, not quite like them… god it’s so perfect. I read her as being somewhat low empathy as well, it’s hard for her to change her perspective to that of others. Plus the fact her brother neddy is a pretty obvious metaphor for higher supports needs autism. I think they of represent how autism runs in the family and appears in all sorts of different ways in different people. They’re sort of two different representations of the spectrum.

Marcy wu from amphibia

I mean this one is just obvious. The biggest nerd of all time. So obsessed with her RPG special interest that she literally sucks her and her friends into a fantasy world. She’s clumsy (just like me fr), very smart but super socially awkward, a little oblivious and naive. She’s terrified of change, especially if it means abandoning the few social bonds she’s been able to make. I honestly find it hard to believe this wasn’t intentional.

Entrapta from she-ra

Another pretty overt example. I do have some issues with how she was portrayed in the show- (keeping her on a leash was weird.) but overall I really love her. She understands her tech, not people, and it can cause her to come into conflict with other characters. Their treatment of her makes me sad at times, but it’s realistic. I also love some of her other quirks, her love of tiny food, her exitable demeanor, ect.

Pearl from Steven Universe

Peridot is the more obvious example of an autistic character in SU, and while I agree she’s coded that way, I personally resonate more with Pearl. She is not very socially aware, and bothered by disruptions to her routine/ broader life changes. She doesn’t like to break rules (despite being a literal rebel lol.) I find it interesting how she seems to have the poorest understanding of life on earth out of the gems, despite having lived here for thousands of years. She is graceful, but has an almost sort of awkward gangly-ness to her that I relate to. Her neuroticism is also very similar to how my anxiety disorder presents.

Pearl has a tendency to infodump, without realizing those around her are uninterested. Even her relationship with Rose struck a chord with me. The hopeless devotion to her, the way she followed along at her side. It’s how many of my friendships have been. Obvious it’s not exactly the same considering Pearl having originally been her servant, but while not being an explicitly autistic trait, that sort of clingy, starstruck relationship is something autistic people are prone to developing. She does little hand stims at times too that I love to see.

Poison Ivy (specifically the version in the Harley Quinn animated show)

I’m surprised I haven’t seen more people mention poison Ivy. Fiercely intelligent and deeply introverted, she isolates herself from all people, and only connects with and understands her plants. (Which her deep affinity for can definitely be read as a special interest.) She very overtly has trouble forming relationships with others.

She’s blunt, socially awkward and a loner, has something of a flat effect and a monotone voice. Those around her initially read her as cold and impersonable.Her struggle with social anxiety as well as intense fear of failure/ low self esteem is also very relatable to me. She also often struggles to express/understand her feelings and emotions. Her radical political ideas and the fact that she’s literally an ecoterrorist paints her as having a very strong sense of justice and a somewhat black and white worldview. (Me)

Finally, her relationship with Harley just SCREAMS neurodivergent solidarity. Harley Quinn is (I think canonically) adhd, and they’re both outsiders in the world that found each other and just… get each other. She’s Ivy’s closest and only friend and amazing girlfriend and god it’s all so perfect.

They remind me a lot of the relationship I have with my best friend with adhd except theirs is gayer.

[ask-artsy-oncie]

The children of Laios and Kabru! My first drawing of them was as very young children but I always find it much easier and more fulfilling to design more grown versions of characters because they have more developed personalities that can show through! In this case they're all fully grown here, with the eldest being 20 and the youngest being 16. (I'm also a dumbass and meant to put "first queen regent", not simply "first queen")

Some more about them under the cut

The name "Kilala" came up when I was looking for names related to "Ambrosia", because I think Laios would hear that Marcille's staff is named something that means "food of the gods" and fall in love with the concept and want that name for his kid, to the chagrin of everyone in his immediate vicinity. I imagine Kabru would attempt to compromise by looking into names with similar meanings.

They all inherited monster features from Laios, mostly subtle things like heightened senses and fangs and claws, but then Cassius was born with a tail (resembling one of the two Laios had in his monster form). He'll grab onto it as a nervous tick but for the most part I don't think he actually likes having a tail. It singles him out, since his sisters all have much subtler features than he does, and he's not the kind of person who likes being the center of attention. Sometimes he hides his tail in one of his pant legs so he doesn't have to think about it.

Laios and Kabru planned on having three kids because Laios is vehemently against the idea of adhering to the tradition of "first born son has to be the successor". He lived that, and he hated having that loom over him. So if he has to have kids, and one of them has to succeed him, he'd rather it be whichever kid ends up wanting it, rather than having it be decided for them. Ergo, multiple kids leaves more chances that one of the kids actually wants to be the next monarch. Three sounded reasonable so that's what they planned for, but then the third "child" turned out to be twins.

And yeah, as it states above, Cassius did not want to be king. Luckily for him, Kilala was more than willing to follow in her dad's footsteps.

They call Laios "dad" and Kabru "papa".

I don't actually know if Kabru would be able to pass down the gene for his blue eyes or the gene for his family's brown eyes, since his eye color is a genetic mutation. Gave the kids a mix of both for variety more than anything.

Kilala's hair is on the redder side due to Laios's mother's red hair. Meanwhile, Pamina looks more like Kabru's mom.

Melora is often in work clothes and wears her hair short because she's working with metal so often, but she does have moments when she wears fancier clothing, she's not opposed to it by any means. She just takes care of her nicer clothing, unlike Pamina, who will only really do as much as roll up her skirt and/or sleeves to protect her dresses.

Pamina is immensely comforted by the smell of gardenias (and as a kid even wistfully thought of having her name changed to Gardenia) and carries around a vial of perfume of it. She also, maybe paradoxically, loves the smell of dogs. I imagine the castle has plenty of dogs living in it by the time the kids are born, and she can often be found with her face pressed up against one.

Pamina and Cassius are the only ones of the four who end up having kids of their own.

Kilala is a horrible liar and would regularly get herself and her siblings in trouble by virtue of not being able to hide their troublemaking. Kabru insists that being an honest ruler is a strength she can utilize rather than focusing on her inability to convincingly lie.

When Kilala and Cassius were young children, like shortly after the twins were born, Kabru would try to get them to mask their autistic traits. Eye contact and "fidgeting" was a big problem for the both of them. The first major fight Laios and Kabru had as parents had to do with this, because Laios did not want to pressure his kids to be "normal" the way he and Falin were, while Kabru specifically wanted his kids to be prepared and protected against being ostracized like he was. They both wanted to protect their kids, but had completely opposing ways to go about this. Ultimately, I think, the kids ended up being taught how to mask but aren't outright pressured to do so.

[theorahsart]

Would you happen to be able to compile a list of all the evidence/mentioned traits you know of that point towards Robespierre having autism, possibly with some sources of said evidence? You have my deepest gratitude if you do happen to be so kind as to take the time to answer this ask.

Hello! I'm sorry for taking a while to answer this- it of course was the kind of ask that requires some time to write! I'm gonna break it up into two posts, I hope that's okay. I'll just @ you when I do the next part.

I feel like I should start with saying that I'm not an expert in history (feel like I have loads to learn tbh). But I am an expert in autism, as I'm autistic, and know the topic thoroughly from cultural/social/medical perspectives- several of my educational comics are used in training programs by doctors and diagnoticians. So, you can trust everything I say about autism in this post.

You probably can't trust everything I say about Robespierre though lol. Compared to some actual historians I've talked to here, I haven't developed the skills of being able to discern when the info I get in books can be fully trusted, and the more I study Frev the more evident it is that just because I've read smth in a book, doesn't mean it can be trusted as fact haha. I've read 3 different posts from different historians in the last year that've debunked several 'facts' presented to me in published books loool

But anyway! I still personally think Robespierre was autistic, and I'll lay out why in the 2nd post.

I think it would take me more free time than I have to list *all* the evidence I've come across, so it seems best to break down how you diagnose autism in modern day, and then put that in context to some examples.

So this first part is just explaining *one way* in which medical professionals break down autism and the traits. Then in the next post I'll explain how I've applied those to Robespierre specifically.

How we think about and diagnose autism from modern day pov

I wanna start by breaking down how diagnoticians think about Autism specifically.

Autism doesn't encompass a specific set of traits that every single person must have in order to be diagnosed, because autistic traits vary so much from person to person.

Instead, you break down a diagnosis into different areas of life in which someone might be struggling. How this is broken down can vary a little between tests, but it's generally split into these areas:

Social

Social reciprocity (how sociable you are with others)

Non verbal comminication

Verbal communication

Maintaining relationships

Restrictive and Repetitive behaviour

Repetitive speech or movements (basically stimming)

Routines and change

Highly fixed/intense interests

Hyper or hypo reaction to sensory input

And then basically, if enough of these areas are having a significant impact on your life, you're dx'd as Autistic.

You can see when broken down in this way, that:

You can be doing fine in some of these areas, but still be dx'd if there's a lot of other areas listed you're struggling in.

A NT person will likely have some sort of trouble in one or two of the listed areas (because we all have strengths and weaknesses). That doesn't mean they're autistic.

An autism dx is concluded from two things- if you struggle in more of these areas than less. And if those struggles are significantly impacting your life.

Just to note, I'm only talking from a diagnosis pov here, which is wrapped up in cultural contexts and the reasons we decided to give this way of being a label. Theres lots of traits we can also break down that aren't based around what you find difficult.

You could be autistic and go your whole life not knowing or needing a diagnosis, if say, you lived a lifestyle where you could avoid people and situations that are making you suffer. Your autism might make you excel in life, depending on your life.

But just esp in modern day, many of us dont have that luxury.

I'm using this type of dx in the context of Robespierre because I believe he did have difficulties that impacted his life and career, and it's significant to me to compare his behaviour and health to other politicians working in the same stressful circumstances.

But yeah I'll write this in a second post. Thanks for your patience!! 🙏

[the-violet-galaxy]

On the topic of Ruin

EDIT: Just for reference, with further updates a few of these opinions have changed, but a lot of the sentiment is the same. (I also hadn't watched everything from the show yet, so my knowledge of some of the lore was spotty).

-

So. We just learned a lot about Ruin, didn’t we? The big twist and who he was all along.

Let me say, I adore this show! The story has been incredible and I’ve been at the edge of my seat the whole time. It’s been fascinating going back and forth about Ruin, listening to the arguments about whether he was good or evil. And when he was revealed to have built Eclipse all along, it was a matter of whether he did so knowingly or not.

But. Now we know for certain that Ruin did it willingly, and he was 100% aware, and faking being nice the whole time; and even if I WANT to hold out hope for him, there keep being less and less ways for Ruin to somehow be good or redeemed at the end of this. It seems Ruin might be confirmed 100% to be evil through and through, no Jekyll and Hyde, second personality, or return of the virus, like a lot of us had hoped.

And… I don’t know if I like this twist.

… Sadly, I can't say I do.

And I’d like to give my thoughts why! I have a lot to say, both from the perspective of a Ruin fan and from a storytelling perspective. So there's lots of analysis and personal feelings mixed together down here!

(And of course, there is still more to be revealed, but this is how it stands now.)

My first point is that it loses the show of a very good character.

Ruin was a great character! He was so unique in his personality, traits, and mannerisms compared to the rest of the cast, and his interactions with others were tons of fun.

It also just made a ton of sense to have him around: he is basically Canon Eclipse from the Ruin DLC, so letting him be here is just a Big Brain move.

There was so much potential for where he could go, given his backstory. He was a person who had 50 years of his life stolen from him, his entire world and everything he ever knew was destroyed, HIS BODY was the tool used to do it; and here he was, waking up in a new world his evil self tried to destroy, after being saved thanks to the kindness of several strangers who had every right to kill him but risked so much just to give him a chance. And now, unmoored here, he’s just trying to rebuild anything resembling a life --

There were SO many things you could do with this, SO many interesting ways Ruin could have developed… the angst; the sheer guilt of having killed so many people and destroyed so much; the fear of what he would see, if his memories from his time with the virus ever got uncorrupted; the TERROR he feels that his virus self might not actually be fully gone, and the desperation to NOT turn back into his other self and hurt anyone ever again -- the feeling of being excluded by everyone in this new dimension, he stays out of their way because he feels somewhat responsible for his Virus self hurting them, being the Weird Person who tries to fit in but really has no place anywhere, just wants to have a new life and new family with these people… (His relationship with Solar in particular was so interesting to me.) Ruin could have made up with Sun, after a long time of Sun being uncomfortable with him.

He was just one of the most fun characters to have around, including his streak of doing weird things. (And this is just personal, but I’m autistic, so I read that into a lot of his mannerisms. I loved him.)

And he paralleled many characters too!! In a way, you could say he was similar to New Moon: Ruin was created when his Sun and Moon fused, meaning Ruin is technically an incarnation of them, but he’s NOT them -- the way New Moon is an incarnation of Moon, but he’s not Old Moon. Ruin and Moon could have had formed a connection through that, at some point.

(And in this new arc, if we go with the idea that Ruin is innocent and a second personality was the one doing everything, then Ruin would be a parallel to Eclipse himself!! Eclipse is fabricated and nothing about him is “real” – the same could be said for Ruin in this event, where his second personality is literally messing with his brain, making Ruin also a "fabricated" personality of some kind. There is a line Ruin says when Eclipse kidnapped him that I always found interesting, where Ruin offered to heal Eclipse’s mind like therapy, which Eclipse shot down… I always liked that idea, that Eclipse and Ruin could bond. If Eclipse learned RUIN wasn’t to blame and it was a second personality, then, well, it could have happened. Why would the writers throw that idea out if they knew they would never do anything with it?)

As it was, Ruin had an entire WORLD of potential. And his existence made sense on a meta level, with link to the DLC's Canon Eclipse.

But that’s all gone now. Ruin being 100% evil just loses all that.

I think they did too good a job of making Ruin an enjoyable character to have around, if they knew he was going to be evil the whole time and were going to kill him in the end. (At the same time, they also didn’t utilize him in certain ways, like how Ruin never got a therapy session with Earth and was excluded from some of the group events, which logically would have been good for covering his tracks.)

Could there have been both a Good-Ruin and Ruin-Remade-Eclipse-Twist at the same time?

I’ll talk more about it in the next point, but I genuinely think the writers could have had it both ways if they had wanted to. They could have let Ruin be a good and innocent person who can stay around as a member of the cast, while STILL having him be the rebuilder of Eclipse and the source of other evil things. How?

The Two-Personalities theory! It’s been a theory for a while that Ruin has more than one personality inside of him, the second personality usually theorized to be his Virus Self. When he slips up and says stuff like “OUR head’s spinning a little bit” when getting the memory scrub from Moon, for instance. Ruin would be innocent and unaware, while his Virus/Other Self takes over when he’s not mentally present and does the bad things.

(Or alternatively: Ruin as an innocent person WAS real for a while, but his virus came back at some point.)

If that is what happened, they could have their cake and eaten it too.

And I think that would have been a better utilization of the worldbuilding given to us. Elaborated further:

I feel they could have utilized the worldbuilding in better ways.

One of the most interesting parts of the Show is how it plays with the concept of identity for these robots. There are several characters that are new incarnations of previous characters, but are distinctly different people from their previous selves. Bloodmoon, Moon, Eclipse, etc. 

Look closer at Moon. Even if they are incarnations of the same person, Old Moon and New Moon are completely separate individuals. New Moon lost his memories and remembers nothing of being Old Moon, which is WHY he is a new person. It would be completely unfair to blame New Moon for what Old Moon did – New Moon did not kill those children, New Moon did not abuse Sun, because he does not remember it. Because he does not remember it, he shouldn’t be punished for those things, because HE did not do them. What this means is that MEMORY is one of the key aspects in a robot’s identity, and their identity can change depending on those memories.  

Now take that, and apply it to Ruin: how interesting would it have been if RUIN, the one we saw in the videos, was actually fully innocent and completely unaware of what his body was being used to do the entire time? Because his evil past self/second personality had been controlling him and literally editing over top of his memories while his body was building Eclipse and preparing the Arcade plan, so that Ruin had no idea anything was going on? For all these months, Ruin GENUINELY believes he is innocent, and doesn’t remember doing anything that brought Eclipse back; he’s in distress when suspicion falls on him because he “knows” he did nothing wrong, and he’s relieved when Moon scrubs his mind and finds nothing there; phew, now they can trust him. But then! Along with Moon, Solar, Sun, and everyone else, he would find out he WAS doing it all along. Ruin could be utterly HORRIFIED and aghast that his worst fear (turning back into his evil self) had come true. And imagine the angst for that too, “my memories have been messed with so much – I’m basically a fabrication of a personality, DO I EVEN COUNT AS TRULY EXISTING!?” 

This could even lead to an interesting moral conundrum for Sun and Moon too. Moon is already on the warpath and has less patience for Ruin’s life (especially with how much harm Ruin seemingly did to them), so would Moon be eager to KILL Ruin (or if not kill him, then at least give Eclipse permission to do it)? Or would Moon be talked through it, sort of realize “Ruin doesn’t remember any of it and didn’t do it himself. It’s not his fault. The same way Old Moon’s actions are not mine. It would be unjust to kill him because RUIN wasn’t the one who did any of it.”

Many possibilities.

...But no, none of that ended up happened.

Instead Ruin is a “was always evil, all along” kind of guy. Which is… pretty disappointing considering the other possibilities. It genuinely feels like “the most obvious option.”

Also, Eclipse has literal command orders built into his head.

So in theory, maybe the innocent Ruin could have had something like this too. Imagine: His second personality, doing things whenever Ruin is mentally asleep, also embeds Ruin's AI with those command prompts that force Ruin to do unusual things. Ruin builds his own body and he doesn't really have a good reason? The commands subconsciously forcing him to. He goes down into the bunker? He has this weird, pathological obsession with doing things with arcade machines he can't quite stop? THE COMMAND LINES, BABY.

Then when it comes time for Moon to memory-scrub him, the second personality could just. Corrupt the lines, hide them with the rest of them.

(Then OO DRAMA later on when everyone realizes Ruin's condition. Just as Eclipse knows he'll die if he differs from his plans, Ruin realizes he's being forced to do things and will die if he doesn't. Hey that's another connection the two could share.)

Eclipse has been right about everything, but this twist sort of invalidates a few of the things Eclipse has said.

Eclipse honed in on Ruin and was correct the whole time. But let’s look at a few episodes, to hyper-analyze some of the things Eclipse said.

The episode where Eclipse kidnapped Ruin:

Ruin: I was far too busy elsewhere to have any, uh, meddling with your being—

Eclipse: You see that’s the funny thing. I don’t think you realize what you’ve DONE. Or what you ARE going to do.

This implies Eclipse ALSO believes Ruin doesn’t remember his actions.  So if Eclipse has been right about everything so far, why would he be wrong about THAT?

In the same episode, after Eclipse tells Ruin: "I'm going to torture you" and leaves, Ruin is left all alone. Because Eclipse has left, Ruin has no reason to keep up the facade of being scared any longer, and YET, he still sits there hyperventilating for a few seconds before saying:

"Oh GOD...."

why would he do that, if he knew he could drop the act?

There’s also the episode where he confronts Ruin, he says:

“What did you do, huh? Changed a bit of your memory? Wiped your whole brain with a magnet? What did you do, huh?”

And I still just feel if Ruin genuinely changed his whole memory and brain, that his entire Ego/Personality should change. 

There’s also just the amount of Eclipse’s “Are you terrified of me?” and scaring Ruin that whole episode.

If Ruin WASN’T in a different, innocent personality at that moment, Eclipse would know he’s not scared. If Ruin BUILT him, he wouldn’t be scared.

Ruin offered to “repair” Eclipse’s mind at one point, comparing it to therapy.

Which Eclipse shot down, of course. If Ruin was 100% faking and knew what he was doing the entire time, and he knew he was never going to do anything of the sort with Eclipse, why would he EVER offer this to Eclipse? Why would the writers throw it out if it was never going to go anywhere?

It loses a perfectly good redemption arc.

One thing about the Show is how its redemptions rarely stick, at least for long. Lunar is like, the only one who has gotten a redemption arc and stayed alive. Killcode died shortly after his redemption. Old Moon tried to change, really he did, but he died before he could ever make the changes he needed to.  Eclipse is currently being worked on in a way, but that is still a LONG ways off. Etc, etc.

Then we had Ruin, who was another successful “redemption”, and it was pretty good to see!! …Which is now ruined (hah) because he was never good to begin with.

LEADING INTO ANOTHER IMPORTANT POINT:

It makes all that effort the other characters went through for nothing.

Sun and Moon tried so hard to help Ruin, they took a risk for him to cure him of his virus – but in the end, this was the Wrong thing to do.

The characters did the right thing!! And they are being punished for it!!

And elaborating on that further:

This is going to negatively affect all the characters going forward.

This entire arc, Moon has been dealing with negative thought patterns and paranoia, and a lot of that paranoia manifested when he was investigating Ruin. He acted pretty cruel to Ruin in many ways, especially during the interrogation. This is why I thought it was very good for Moon when he did the memory scrub, found nothing, and realized he was being kind of a jerk, so he apologized to Ruin and pulled back a bit. He didn’t STOP LOOKING INTO HIM, but it was a lesson for him, to not to let his aggression reign over him when dealing with people he was suspicious of.

(One of the most concerning parts of Moon’s paranoia was how he said he didn’t trust ANYONE. He says so directly to Eclipse: “trust is a FARCE.” Despite this, in some way or form, he DID let his guard down around Ruin and began to trust him just a mild amount.)

WELL NOW THAT’S ALL GONE! Moon will never trust anyone ever again. The last person he gave the benefit of the doubt to turned out to be a multiverse-destroyer. Moon now has every reason to double down on his aggression, his paranoia, his mistrust of other people; in the future I doubt he will ever be so kind or lenient with people. He would probably be more likely to “attack first” when seeing a potential threat. And Sun as well; Sun will have much less reason to want to be kind or to take a chance to help a villain, because one time he helped Ruin and it blew up in his face.

So… good job. :/

It just kind of feels like the most obvious twist that could have written with the pieces on hand.

It’s like… There are a million different moving parts for this mystery -- multi-personalities, the virus, ways to play with memories that change identities, command orders embedded into robot's skulls – and then they chose the most straightforward way to use them.

Over the course of the storyline there were SO many signs pointing to Ruin (one of the Thumbnails even had a Creepy Face hidden in the corner) that it felt there HAD to be some kind of twist involving personalities or memories or someone else controlling him. I don’t want to say bad writing, but….

It almost makes Ruin a little too powerful.

I feel it’s almost cheating in some ways. Ruin is able to edit/corrupt his own memories so Moon couldn’t access them…… but RUIN still know them? Why didn’t Ruin literally forget those things, himself? It feels a little TOO powerful, a little too unrealistic, for him to be able to fool all these scanners and all these people SO easily. ESPECIALLY because we know Moon and Solar (and Eclipse definitely) went snooping around Ruin’s stuff before and looked at his computers; how did they, two galactic supergeniuses, never find ANY hint that Ruin had tampered with the security camera broadcasts when they were doing it?

When Ruin is supposed to be acting, he sounds just a little too sincere.

This is more of a minor thing, but in some of the episodes, when something dramatic happened to Ruin, it doesn't feel like he's acting in-universe; he sounds very sincere.

Just some examples: when he's interrogated by Moon and sounds so sad about being threatened. When Eclipse menaces him several times he's so scared. And many just other instances just. (And again, since I'm autistic, I read some of his stranger mannerisms as just being through that lens. Even if he acted strange sometimes that doesn't automatically equal fakeness.)

And I dunno, maybe he should have had more instances where it didn't feel so sincere.

This makes Solar the only person from another dimension who is good.

Pretty much everyone else from the other dimensions is bad or evil in some way, (aside from like one Sun from the one-off dimension where Moon never existed.) And I love Solar, but for some reason, it just doesn’t feel RIGHT that he’s literally the only person who is totally cool with the Celestial family.  Does anyone else feel that way?

Minor thing: When Moon apologized to Ruin, they said they would make Ruin a bedroom out of one of the alcoves.

Then they didn't.

Petty reason: Ruin was my comfort character, my personal one.

Lol, lmao even, my poor heart. It's broken.

And there are some various other thoughts, but this is also really long, so I'm going to stop here.

At the end of the day, I was really passionate about this character, and I’m disappointed to see it go the route that it did. There WERE ways to have Ruin still be good while also being a villain, just by giving him a second personality. And giving Ruin a second personality, to play around with the worldbuilding of robot memories and how Ruin isn’t responsible due to his memories being different, I personally think would have been more interesting.

Is there ANY hope for Ruin still being around after this? I’m not sure at this point. It’s looking less and less likely that there is a way out for Ruin. It’s looking less and less likely that there are two personalities, or even that Ruin was infected to begin with. 

If he somehow makes it out I’ll be ecstatic, but until then, I have a feeling we might be saying goodbye to him soon.

I still love this Show very much! And the story isn't over yet. So we'll just have to see if it can pull something off with this. But as it stands, I just have to respectfully say I think a mistake has been made in the direction they are going with it.

[the-nexverse]

@thicc-pirate oh boy this is gonna be a hard one

BIG FAT DISCLAIMER: all the knowledge i have about mental disorders is very basic and the most i'll do is read the disorders' wikipedia articles and maybe one or two other articles from trustworthy sources. also please note i'm in no way a psychology expert, so i don't know specific terms or variations, i'll go for a general view on the way they think and view themselves and the world around them, and if there's an illness that matches those conditions, i'll mention it. but again, i am no expert on this, i could very well be wrong about any of it

Agnes: my heart tells me some cluster B personality disorder, but with more of an isolation flavor. substance abuse, bursts of rage, lack of empathy and reckless behavior are there, but also a general internal void/lack of purpose that she fills by finding someone to follow. that could be a dependant trait, but not in the way DPD is described. she also develops depression during arc 3, and deals with depressive symptoms throughout arcs 4-5

Ryan: he has some narcissistic characteristics, but that doesn't really mean he has NPD. he's empathetic, maybe even too much for his own good sometimes, but he's also calculating and manipulative when he wants to, even if his goals aren't for his own gain/selfish reasons. he does have a very black-or-white view on certain topics tho

all of this is about arcs 1-2 Ryan. arcs 3-5 Ryan's issues could fill up an entire book lmao. being locked up, isolated, physically assaulted, tortured and so much more fucks him up in the head so much, but i haven't really developed that part of him too much. PTSD, C-PTSD or both. can it be both? i don't know. i have to look a lot into it, it's too complex

Lisabel: APD straight up from the DSM-5: disregard for others' rights, lack of empathy and remorse, bloated self-image and manipulation, sprinkled with sadism and straight up psychopathy. all of it completely untreated, and she's in no rush to get herself checked. she's perfectly fine!

Eric: ngl he might be the only neurotypical person in the room lmao

Léan: 100% autism spectrum. hyperfixations, sensitivity to loud sounds or bright lights, stimming, some compulsive behaviors, difficulties socialising, etc. Eric wanted to adopt someone who wasn't very likely to get adopted and give them the love they deserve

Rask'r: i doubt there's a lot of research on mental illnesses in TES, but he has dyslexia, and as a lukiul (an argonian that grew up away from the Hist) he has argonian-specific social autism, aka can't read body language and his own body language is undecypherable to other native argonians. add that to wolf-like behavior like tail wagging and you got yourself a complete mess of social cues!

Raz: also dyslexia, some degree of anxiety for sure, abandonment issues, general childhood trauma. another bundle of complicated things

Donovan: not a mental illness per se, but definetely suffers from acedia/apathy

Lee: can you diagnose a non-sapient being with mental illnesses? i think so. PTSD and social anxiety, but he gets rehabbed :]

Vreytus: unidenfitied identity issues and feelings of emptiness/lack of a goal in life (which he fixes by himself. it goes well. for real :) )

Bug: trauma from being experimented on and all the social difficulties of not having been socialised with humans. otherwise they're just weird

Voirdity/voirds: there are no existing words to describe Voirdity's issues

Chad: definetely checks most boxes for NPD, but with time and lots of forced practice he learns to tone it down. not the best therapy method, i know, but probably the best you can get during the post-apocalypse. also self-esteem issues after he became physically disabled

Lewis: social anxiety and autism spectrum. hyperfixation, difficulty with holding eye contact, stimming, autistic self-injury, big meltdowns. to be fair, he's exposed to a lot more of stressing stimuli (Half Life events) so his reactions are a lot more intense and uncontrolled

thanks for the ask!!

@creators-club

[diddgery]

(For the OC asks:)

aeiou: 1, 12 and the world's vaguest 8 since it hasn't debuted yet

Harriet: 6, 10, 20

Aeiou

What was the original thought that led to the creation of this character?

okay so in March I was participating in a TTRPG character creation jam run by my friend Courtney, and early into that jam I decided to make a character with the Masks playbook The Outsider, which is themed around being an alien. I had the idea to make a moon rabbit character for that, because I like moon rabbits conceptually and it felt like a fun idea. After I made the first one I decided to make a few more moon rabbits in different systems. While I was on this moon rabbit kick, so when NS:COI was announced I went "okay this is the perfect place to make a moon rabbit character!" So after some thought and with a little help from my friends, Aeiou was born.

12. Do you have a playlist for the character? What songs do you associate with them and why?

Not really? I do have the beginnings of a playlist, but I don't feel strongly about either of the songs on it right now. Aeiou has been a really hard character for me to pin down musically. This isn't uncommon for my OCs, honestly; I think the ones that do have playlists are the exceptions.

8. What is the origin of their personality? And let's be honest - how much of it is projecting?

For Aeiou I knew I wanted to make a Starfire-esque character who had a strong fascination for Earth but didn't entirely understand it. And as I thought about it and my ideas for moon rabbit culture, I began to bring in other sources of inspiration. Kipo from Kipo, Entrapta from She-Ra. It resulted in a character who was both very intelligent but also very sheltered, who understood facts more than people.

And, for the projecting part... look, every character I make has at least a touch of autism. I can't avoid it. And Aeiou has a lot of autistic traits. It doesn't get other people, it has trouble understanding what's wrong when it crosses boundaries or says something inappropriate, it has trouble conveying its thoughts, all of those. And just look at the characters who inspired it! I think it makes for a fun character, at least...

Harriet

6. What was the thought process behind their appearance? Did you go mostly for the aesthetic or are there other reasons they look the way they do?

Harriet came to me in a dream, and when I first drew her I was trying to capture the vibe I got in the dream. As she developed as a character I started to understand her personal sense of style more, and that led to me experimenting with different outfits. I put her in skirts a lot more earlier on than I would now. She really isn't a skirts or dresses kind of girl.

So Harriet's trademark outfit of the green hoodie and jeans is just the first thing I drew her in, and over time developed to be something she wears in part to hide her rabbit features. But also the hoodie is important to her on a personal level, in the way that having a favorite comfy piece of clothes is. Harriet's also not a very fashionable person most of the time, preferring personal comfort over aesthetics.

That said, recently I have been thinking of her dressing in a more punk/goth/scene kind of way, since that fits her personality and interests really well. In TRUCK her final outfit was this fun fishnets and crop top and goth pants ensemble, and I drew her in that outfit for her human form as well. It feels like quintessential Harriet to me, just as much as her green hoodie and jeans fit does.

I don't know if I answered this question right but uhhh there you go lol

10. What is their main character arc in the story? Where do they start and how do they develop? Do they get a happy ending or is their story a tragic one?

Okay so this is a complicated one to answer because there are two versions of Harriet in my mind: the one from her original story, Lapin Lazuli, and the one I played in TRUCK and later Tributary.

Both start the same way. Harriet is a depressed webcartoonist living with her divorced dad and trying really hard to make her webcomic a success so she can move away from him and finally have a life for herself. She only has two real friends, her IRL bestie Joules (who she has a huge crush on) and her online bestie Witch (who lives on the other side of the country).

In Lapin Lazuli, Harriet starts to develop strange symptoms that eventually result in her growing long floppy rabbit ears. When she approaches her great-uncle, a retired doctor, for help, he turns out to be involved in a secretive organization known as the Consortium, and has Harriet placed in its care so that her anomaly can be studied and (maybe) cured. It's here that Harriet learns that she is transforming into some kind of large rabbit monster, and that when the transformation is finalized she'll lose her mind completely. As months pass she eventually learns that the Consortium doesn't have any desire to cure her, to the point of faking her death so that she can be kept here indefinitely. She manages to stage an escape by causing a containment breach, and once out she calls Joules for help. Shocked and relieved to learn Harriet is alive, they pick her up and take her back to their apartment.

After this, the story becomes a cross-country roadtrip as Harriet and Joules travel from Bend, Oregon to Gloucester, Massachusetts in order to meet up with Witch, who believes that Harriet's condition is a curse and that she can break it. Over the course of the story Harriet grapples with her impending transformation and her fears of losing herself and leaving the most important things in her life unaccomplished. The ending I have in mind is bittersweet. Harriet does fully transform, but she remains herself mentally, so she can still make her comic and keep her friendships despite her new form. I don't know if she tells Joules about how she feels, though, since this version of Harriet took the backseat after I was accepted into TRUCK.

In TRUCK, Harriet gets an artist alley booth at a convention in Seattle and is so stoked about it, but she dies on the way there as the result of a horrible car accident. Her soul is summoned to Calamity Kingdom in another world, where she and 16 other newly-summoned Incarnates are forced to participate in the Ritual of Mutual Sacrifice, a murder game designed to artificially empower Incarnates in hopes of defeating the Demon King. Harriet had to grapple with grieving herself while coming to grips with her new, nightmarish reality. Every day was a struggle to cope, but she tried her best.

But ultimately, it wasn't enough, and she succumbed to her worst instincts and committed murder. Notably she was the only murderer who actually had the intention of killing someone, even though the person she killed was not her intended target. She confessed to her crime at the trial, was executed horribly, and was subsequently revived as a more monstrous version of herself called a Bound. Afterwards she struggled to deal with the guilt she felt, along with the new difficulties that came with being an undying monster doomed to eventually lose her mind. That she still had any friends at all after what she did felt like an impossible bit of kindness from an unkind universe.

At the end of TRUCK, things turned out okay for Harriet, even if it ended with her fully transformed into an anthropomorphic wolpertinger. She wasn't able to entirely come to peace with her original death, or losing her chance to be with Joules, or the guilt and shame she felt over killing her friend and then losing the chance to apologize to them. Those sorts of things take a long time, and Harriet's someone who feels everything so strongly that I'm not sure if she ever will entirely accept what happened. But she had some very close friends and even a girlfriend, and was able to start living her life the way she wanted to for the first time since ever. So even if things weren't perfect, she still wound up happy. I think this is a happier ending for her than the Lapin Lazuli one, because this time she gets to exist in a setting that she herself helps shape. She doesn't have to seclude herself from the world for being a rabbit monster, she just is what she is and that's okay.

Anyway, then I apped her to a multifandom game called Tributary where she was scooped up right after TRUCK ended and forced to deal with even MORE bullshit but that's another story entirely.

20. Bonus question: share any additional thoughts, art, favourite scenes, anything you've been waiting for a chance to ramble about

i already wrote so much about her what do you want from meeee

uhhh i don't know. I love Harriet, she is one of my absolute favorite characters and is so easy and natural for me to write. I love writing her impulsive emotional ass, she is someone who struggles and suffers greatly and has so much mental anguish over the things she's done and the things she's been through, and it brings me a lot of joy when she gets to experience moments of catharsis and true happiness. I'm also someone who struggles a lot with feeling like I deserve kindness and I'm really hard on myself in the same ways Harriet is hard on herself, so it's nice to write someone who struggles in a similar (albeit very exaggerated and intense) way and see her succeed.

she means a lot to me and i'm glad that other people like her too.

[jasper-the-kid]

Autism + ADHD symptoms (with examples) I have

Autism:

DSM-5 Criteria A. Subcategory 1:

“Differences in social-emotional reciprocity”

I initiate conversations a lot, but I often dont know how to continue small talk. (example: someone says its rainy today, I agree with them)

DSM-5 Criteria A. Subcategory 2:

“Differences in nonverbal communicative behaviours used for social interaction”

I make eye contact fine (I think), but I dont know if I'm speaking too loud a lot of the times. I also dont pay attention to, or notice if others body language is different than what they are saying. That sometimes gets me weird looks from peers.

DSM-5 Criteria A. Subcategory 3:

“Differences in developing, maintaining, and understanding relationships”

I struggle with holding friendships if we dont talk/text each other a lot. I also struggle with imaginative play because I dont know all the thoughts of person I'm playing as. so it just ends up feeling like im playing myself.

DSM-5 Criteria B. Subcategory 1:

“Stereotyped or repetitive motor movements, use of objects, or speech.”

I have a habit of echolalia, and lots of stereotypical autistic stims, such as rocking back and forth, hand flapping, jumping, squealing. I dont know if building lego sets counts as repetitive motor movements.

DSM-5 Criteria B. Subcategory 2:

“Insistence on sameness, inflexible adherence to routines, or ritualized patterns of verbal or nonverbal behavior.” 

I'm okay with changes if I choose to change my routine, or I'm aware of the change in routine. I might be a bit pissed off if something got changed without telling me and I might need to get a little adjusted to the new routine, but that's about it.

DSM-5 Criteria B. Subcategory 3:

“Highly restricted, fixated interests that are abnormal in intensity or focus.”

My first major hyper fixation was Harry Potter. I was absolutely obsessed. It was the only book I would read, I would talk about it nonstop, and it was my main source of happiness and joy. I would say now, my main hyper fixation is David Tennant and anything to do with him or things he's been in.

DSM-5 Criteria B. Subcategory 4:

“Hyper- or hypo-reactivity to sensory input or unusual interest in sensory aspects of the environment”

I think Im more hyper reactive to sensory input. I've always been a sensory seeker, apart from loud noises. If you look back on old videos of me, I used to scream and cry when someone would blow dry my hair. I also used to always touch the clothes on the racks when I was in the stores, but I still hate grocery stores, and black lights.

DSM-5 Criteria C.

"Traits must be present in the early developmental period (but may not become fully manifest until social demands exceed limited capacities, or may be masked by learned strategies in later life)."

I can't really say for sure, simply because I do not remember much of my childhood. I just remember always feeling different, or out of place, from the other children

DSM-5 Criteria D.

"Traits cause clinically significant impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of current functioning."

I think it impacts me significantly because it makes it difficult to create new friendships and for me to meet new people outside of the bubble of friends I have around me.

DSM-5 Criteria E.

"These disturbances are not better explained by intellectual disability or global developmental delay."

As of current, I am not diagnosed with any type of intellectual disability.

ADHD:

Cluster A. Inattentive ADHD

"Difficulty with sustained attention"

This sometimes happens, but not all the time. I usually am able to get into the zone

"Difficulty breaking down large project"

"Losing objects"

I have lost so many objects simply because I dont remember where I put them.

"Forgetfulness"

My entire life is a story of forgetfulness. Same symptoms as symptom above

"Avoidance of tasks requiring sustained attention"

I dont like doing some types of homework because it really bores me so I procrastinate until the day before its due.

"Distractability"

I get distracted by practically everything. My phone, random noises, my thoughts, an interesting video.

"Overlooking details"

I have a habit of just skimming over a question and the writing the answer, so sometimes I can miss crucial details in the question.

"Daydreaming & spacing in conversation"

I listen to people in conversation, but sometimes my brain drifts off to other places.

"Appearing not to listen"

This can be applicable to the symptom above too.

Cluster B. Hyperactivity and Impulsivity

"Excessive talking"

If I am with people I am comfortable with, I have trouble not interrupting others

"Fidgeting"

I'm always moving some part of my body, most usually quietly

"Difficulty sitting still"

same as above

"Difficulty with quiet"

I dont think so, I'm a pretty quiet person when alone.

"Difficulty engaging in leisure activities"

Dont know what this means

"Difficulty resting"

also dont know what this means.

"Intruding or interrupting others"

Same as excessive talking tbh

"Restlessness (could be internal)"

I have a lot of words and things in my head, and sometimes I just need to do something, almost like there are ants in my pants.

"Impatience and difficulty waiting turn"

I'll be annoyed and frustrated if theres a long line, say, at the supermarket.

You can see where I stopped being motivated to write answers lmao. I think this is pretty strong evidence tbh