#are they turning into ocs? yes. am i upset about it? yes.

[wildernessuntothemselves]

Jealousy, Jealousy... | Part 6

A/N: don't even have a summary for this. oc is in love with gyu and gyu is in love with another girl but both are virgin losers and gyu is a horndog who would let oc do what she wants to him just as long as he gets to cum.

Word count: 6.2k

Genre: Smut, angst, fluff

Warnings: fem!reader, loss of virginity, PIV sex, fingering, brief pussy licking, sub!reader, dom!yeonjun.

Despite what Beomgyu said, he and Haeun seem to have become an item, just as you and Yeonjun are now. They’re always together, as you are with Yeonjun, and it’s like you and Beomgyu don’t even know each other anymore. He’s always hanging out with her and you’re always hanging out with Yeonjun. You hardly see Beomgyu anymore, which makes it weird the way he’s sitting on your bed, watching you get ready just like old times. 

You remember how you and he used to play a game sometimes as you got ready where you’d pick out various outfits and try them out for Beomgyu, giving him a mini-fashion show that he would narrate as if it was a football game, going on about how groundbreaking the designs are and how pretty the model (you) looks. 

He was your main supporter in going into fashion as a major. You don’t think you would’ve had the courage to do it without him. He always believed in you and stood by you even when your parents were upset at you for choosing a career with such an uncertain future. He told you that if one of you succeeds, you’ll just pull the other up too. If his music career takes off, he’ll contract you to be the creative director for the band and if your fashion career takes off, you’ll have to hire him as your model. And if you both fail…well you’ll be strippers together.

You laugh as you remember your promise and turn back towards Beomgyu, who was sitting on your bed watching you. “Hey, remember our backup plan? That we’ll make a two-man stripper show to repay our student debt?” 

But Beomgyu doesn’t share your laughter. Instead he just hums, focusing on your dress. 

“What? You don’t like it?” You ask, insecure. You’re not used to wearing something this extravagant but Yeonjun is taking you to a photography exhibition tonight and he told you it’s gonna be really fancy. 

You’re not sure if being stressed out and sweating as you try not to get judged by all those more talented and influential people is the best idea for a date but Yeonjun insisted that if you wanted to get into fashion, you have to start mingling. 

You didn’t even have a proper dress. You had to wear something you made for a fallen goddess shoot you had in mind, but by the look Beomgyu is giving you, it’s probably trash. 

"Does it matter?" He asks and you frown. "What do you mean?"

"It means that with what you're wearing, I don't even know why you’re bothering going on a date when you can just invite him over and let him fuck you now, skip the formalities." 

"You're unbelievable." You spit out, trying to hide the dread filling your chest and making you struggle to breathe. Yes, the dress was a bit more revealing than you’re used to, but it’s an art event, people wear this stuff there all the time.  

“Where did you even get this dress?” He asks in distaste and you hold your head up high. “I made it.” 

That makes him back down, his eyes visibly softening as regret shows on his face. “Oh… It’s pretty.” 

You snort in disbelief. "Why are you even here, Beomgyu?"

He shrugs. "Just watching this shitshow go down."

“Right.” You mutter bitterly, "I guess it was too much to expect you to act like a friend." 

"I am your friend.” He says as if declaring it is enough to make it true. “I'm your best friend." 

"I wouldn't be so sure."

He jumps off the bed when he hears that, quickly getting in front of you. "What does that mean?” 

"Nothing. I'm going to be late." You try to get past him but he won’t let you. "No. What do you mean by that? You said I'd never lose you."

"Yeah, that was before you transformed into this asshole who accuses me of trying to sabotage his career and calling me a slut for daring to date."

He moves back, stunned at your words, and you almost laugh. Is he really surprised? "I'm just… working through some stuff."

"Stuff? That's your excuse?" You ask incredulously and he looks away. Is “stuff” worth what he’s done to your friendship?

"It's just hard for me to see you with him." He finally admits and you sigh. Not this again. "Beomgyu, I know you’re worried about your band, but Yeonjun and I are adults, even if we break up, that doesn't mean–"

"It's not about that." He shakes his head, cutting you off. 

"Then what is it?" You ask, frustrated. Frankly, you’re at your rope’s end with his weird behavior. 

"You're too good for him."

"What?” You reel back. Now, this is new. “Is it because he sleeps around? Because we’ve talked about it and he insisted that just because he's had many casual relationships before doesn't mean he's gonna cheat on me. We've been together for a while now and he has been nothing but wonderful to me."

He really has. You don't know what's wrong with you. Why can't you love him the way you love your asshole best friend? Maybe it will come with time? You've known Beomgyu for years and your love for him didn't develop overnight. Maybe you just need to give your relationship with Yeonjun more time. 

You hope it doesn't take years to get over Beomgyu and fall in love with Yeonjun though. 

"It's not that. It's not him. You're too good for everyone." 

"Beomgyu…" You walk towards him and hold his hands. "I know you're not used to me going out with guys because, well, I've kind of lead a fairly loser-ish life--you know, you've been there– and maybe me and Yeonjun won't end up working out and maybe I'll end up hurt but I can't just be virginal forever. I have to try to find someone for me."

"But you have someone." He pulls you towards him, resting his forehead against yours as he plays with your hands. "Me." 

That hurt more than any mean thing he has ever said to you and he doesn't even mean to hurt you. He has been terrible to you all this time because he thinks you deserve more? Because he wants things to stay the way they are? That is fucking absurd and so infuriating. Why couldn't he have just told you that instead of acting like an ass? Not wanting to lose you doesn’t mean he gets to order you around. Being worried about you doesn't give him the right to treat you like a stupid slut. 

"Don't be stupid." You say harshly, making him flinch. You try again, softer this time, not letting the anger and pain through as much. "I know I have you but I need more."

"More what? Why can't things just stay the way they are? We have fun together, right? I make you laugh. I'm there for you when you're down. We've even messed around. What can he give you that I can't?" 

Love. You need love and even though Beomgyu loves you very much, it's not in the way you need.

"Beomgyu, you’re being very childish about this. We're not twelve anymore. I know you’re scared that we'll drift apart if I find someone but the only reason we’ve been drifting apart is because of your behavior. I can't keep coddling you. You may not like it because it’s only been you and I until now, but it's time for me to find an actual boyfriend instead of this–this joke I have with you." 

Maybe you’re being too harsh on him but you’re honestly too hurt to sugarcoat it anymore. And you also need to hear it yourself. What you have with Beomgyu isn't real and you need to face the fact that it will never be. "I need someone to actually love and to hold and to be my other half. Us messing around together is just that, messing around, nothing more. I need something real. You do too. I mean you're finally with the woman you've been chasing after for years. Do you really wanna throw that away just because you're scared?"

Still, seeing the way he becomes quiet after your outburst, looking away from you and not responding… maybe you could’ve been nicer about it. 

“Beomgyu…” You sigh, reaching out to turn his face towards you but he pushes your hand away, refusing to meet your gaze. 

"Go. You’re late for your date." He grits out and you look at the time. Crap. You are! 

You look at him again, seeing the tension in his jaw and shoulders, something that resembles pain etched on his features. Should you stay and work this out for him or go on your date? If you stay, you’d be choosing him yet again. If you stay then you’ll just teach him that all he needs to do is act out and you’ll cave and do what he wants. No, you need to make some changes. That’s what you promised Yeonjun when you and him decided to become exclusive. Beomgyu can’t come first anymore. 

"I have to go. Let’s talk about this later." You step back, ignoring the hurt in his eyes as you grab your bag and head for the door. 

____________________

When Yeonjun said the place was fancy, he wasn’t kidding. You’re blown away right now, surrounded by people you’ve only known about through magazine spreads and hours of admiration through the internet. You can’t believe you’re here in the same room with such talented artists and creators. 

You feast your eyes on the multiple displays from different photographers and artists, analyzing their technique, their vision, and their subject, and you’re just in awe. This is exactly where you should be, mingling with the others in your field, making connections, building a network… except you haven’t really gotten the hang of socializing yet. You’re too nervous to talk to anyone. You just stand silently next to Yeonjun as he charms his way through the crowd, joking there, throwing a compliment here or purring a small flirty line that has the other party blushing. 

He can turn it on for anyone. He’s so good you can’t help wondering where his charming nature ends and his actual affection for you begins. How do you know he’s not just charming you the same way he charms everyone else? 

“Do you like it?” Yeonjun asks, and you snap out of your thoughts. You look around to see that everyone around you has left and you’re standing alone with him. “Huh?” 

“You’ve been staring at this particular shot for a long time. Do you like it?” He laughs and you shake your head. “Not really.”

“Really? Why not? It’s well shot, the composition is good, the set design is top-notch and the clothes really complement the atmosphere.” 

“That’s all true.” You agree, and he laughs–his sweet tinkering laugh that makes you smile.  “Then what’s the problem?”

“I don’t like the model. It’s obvious the photographer was going for a femme fatale look but she doesn’t deliver. She’s supposed to have the face of an angel but the aura of the devil. She has to convey the monster within but she’s so afraid of not looking pretty, it just comes across as if she’s putting on an act rather than losing herself in the madness of it.”

“You really don’t like her, huh?” He laughs, and you furrow your eyebrows. “Well, it’s not really her fault so much as it’s the fault of the photographer. They should be directing the model on how to act and correcting them when they’re doing something wrong. This model is obviously gorgeous and she has the potential in her to look fierce, but with a weak direction like this, all you get is what basically amounts to a child dressing in her mother’s clothes.” 

You hear someone huff behind you and turn around to see a very disgruntled man. “And to whom do I owe this very shrewd commentary on my work?” 

Oh, shit. Oh, fuck. 

“I–I am… I’m nobody.” You squeak, wishing the monster from the next picture over would jump out of the frame and swallow you whole right now. 

“That’s right, you are nobody.” The man haughtily agrees. 

“Hey, man, she’s just giving her opinion.” Yeonjun attempts to interject but the man pays him no mind. “I am an award winning photographer. I don’t take the juvenile half-baked opinions of nobodies. Come back when you’ve actually achieved something that could hold a candle to what I’ve done over my career. Oh no wait, you’ll never amount to anything if these are the opinions your artistically challenged brain comes up with.” 

“Hey–Yeonjun protests, a scene starting to form around you, but you quickly cut it short–the humiliation already too much for you to handle. 

“I’m sorry.” You tear up, quickly turning and running away. 

Through your tears, you can see the shocked and confused looks of the other patrons so you quickly keep your gaze to the ground until you’re out of the gallery and near Yeonjun’s car in the quiet parking lot where no one can see you cry. 

No one except Yeonjun who followed closely after you. “Wait up! Baby–Are you okay?” 

“I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I embarrassed you in front of everyone. I’m sorry I ruined your night.” You babble, tears streaming down your face. “You shouldn’t have taken me to such a nice place. I didn’t deserve it.”

Why the hell did you even think you would ever make it in such a business. The best you’d be able to achieve is etsy store designs and wedding photographs. You’ve just messed up your first chance at making connections AND you fucked up your date with Yeonjun. You’re such a screw up. 

“Woah, calm down. You didn’t do any of those things.” He holds you in his arms and you bury your face in his shirt, seeking comfort and a place to hide from him. “Don’t lie. I ruined everything.” 

Maybe now he’ll even realize that you’re not as cool as he thought you were. That you’re not actually this artistic person he probably imagined you as and lose interest. He’d know you’re a fraud and dump you. Then you’d be left with no Beomgyu and no boyfriend. Just your loser self. 

“You didn’t. But you crying might ruin my shirt.” 

You gasp, pulling away and trying to step back but he holds you by the arms, giving you a mischievous grin. “I’m kidding. You can soak me through with tears and snot all you want.” 

“You’re an asshole.” You smack his chest, pouting. 

“Maybe. But I got you to stop crying.” He says and you frown. He actually did. While you might’ve preferred a more sweet approach to getting you to stop crying, this still worked. 

You sigh, little cries bubbling up in your chest still. “I still am sorry. You wanted to do something nice for me and I ruined it with my big mouth.” 

“No, you didn’t.” He retorts, wiping away the few stray tears still falling. “I loved hearing everything you had to say. I thought you made some really good points. He was just threatened that you could've done a way better job than he did.”

“You really think so?” You peer up at him, hopeful that he’s not just saying that to make you feel better. 

“Yes, but don’t start crying again.” He laughs, kissing the pout you answer him with. “In fact, I’m free if you ever want to try it out. And I want you to know that I take very good direction.”

There goes the flirting again. The one that makes you wonder if he’s sincere or it’s just part of his charm.  

"Yeah, we could do that." You say nervously, letting him prop your chin up to press a proper kiss onto your lips. 

“Do you wanna get something to eat?” He asks but you shake your head. “Not hungry. Too depressed.” 

“Aw, baby, do you wanna head back home with me? I can make you forget all about that asshole.” He brushes your hair out of your face, kissing you again, and you know what he’s really asking. 

You’ve already gone on a few dates with him. It’s not too soon for this. This is what people who like each other do after going on multiple dates. And if you want to get over Beomgyu, you’re going to have to completely give yourself to Yeonjun. You can’t be holding anything back in the hopes that Beomyu might want it someday. 

You put on a brave smile for Yeonjun. “Yes. Let’s head home.” 

____________________________

“Hey, you don’t have to be nervous.” Yeonjun whispers to you, feeling you tense up as he tries to push the straps of your dress down your shoulders. “You’re beautiful."

Does he really think that? You can’t be that beautiful compared to the women he’s been with. 

"Did I tell you how much I love this dress?" He asks, toying with the neckline, and you shake your head. "I love it. Makes you look like a movie star. So beautiful and sexy. Almost makes me not want to take it off."

His lips brush softly over your skin, raising goosebumps in their wake before he pulls back to look you in the eye. "But I wanna see all of you. Will you let me see you, doll?"

You nod, holding your breath as he pulls the dress down your chest, kissing every inch of skin on the way until your breasts are bare and his plush lips are wrapped around your nipple. 

“Yeonjun…” You whine, grabbing onto his hair as he kisses and kneads your breasts, slowly but surely turning you on. 

“Does it feel good, doll?” Yeonjun smirks, one of his hands going between your legs to rub your pussy. 

“Yes. Please.” 

“I got you, baby.” His mouth moves down your body as he pulls your leg apart. 

“Missed this.” He murmurs, reaching your pussy and giving it a wide lick as his finger prods at your opening and pushes through. “Oh, that went in easy.” 

“I… I finger myself.” You admit bashfully, covering your face with your hands, feeling embarrassed for some reason but Yeonjun just laughs and leans up to remove your hands and kiss you. “That’s okay, makes my job easier.” 

You give him a confused look but quickly realize what he means when he presses another finger into you, moving both of them in and out to loosen your pussy. 

“See? All good. I’ll have you fucked open for me in no time.” He drawls, staring you down confidently as he works another finger into you. You tense up on that last one so he uses his thumb to rub your clit to get you to relax a bit. “There you go. Open up for me, doll. Let yourself feel good.” 

You’re trying to, you really are. You’re trying to focus on the moment, the burning feeling moving up your body from your pussy that just needs to be quenched. 

He’s doing it so well, hitting all the right spots, completely confident and self-assured. He knows exactly what he’s doing. No clumsiness. No unchecked lust. No uncontainable eagerness. Just steady, purposeful movements that touch you places you didn’t even know you were sensitive. 

“Feels good.” You slur, pressing your pussy further into his hand, grinding against his palm to seek more of that mind-numbing stimulation. “More.” 

“I know, baby. But let me take it slow for you.” 

You shake your head. You don’t want it slow. You want him to lose himself in you. “No. Want you now.” 

“Doll–”

“Fuck me, Yeonjun. Make me yours.” Please. Please make me yours. Make me stop thinking about him. 

Are you doing this for all the wrong reasons? Maybe, but how else are you supposed to get over Beomgyu? Don't they say the best way to get over a guy is to get under another one? Well, you'll just have to test that theory. 

Yeonjun relents, shushing your needy mewls with kisses as he takes his hand away. “Hush, doll. I’ll fill you up again in a second.” He undoes his pants and pushes them off along with his underwear before grabbing you by the thighs and lining himself up with your pussy. 

“You ready, baby?” He asks and you just stare at his cock. 

Has Beomgyu already fucked her? He must have. He’s so needy to get his dick wet that he’d never miss up the chance. 

You look up at Yeonjun. “Do it. Fuck me.” 

Ok, so maybe you fingering yourself hadn’t fully prepared you for this. Maybe you should’ve taken a page out of Beomgyu’s book and gotten yourself a sex toy–a dildo to practice with before the real thing. 

Thankfully, Yeonjun takes it slow despite your earlier demands, thrusting into you shallowly, letting you get used to his length bit by bit. 

“Relax for me, doll.” He purrs gently, kissing all over your face as his hands massage your thighs, doing his best to get you to loosen up. 

“Yes, Junnie.” You whimper, head falling back as you will your body to relax. You hear a soft chuckle coming from him. “Junnie? That’s cute.” 

You blush as you realize what you’d said. You couldn’t help it. You love giving cute nicknames to your friends. And you guess your boyfriend too. 

Yeah, because Yeonjun is your boyfriend now and boyfriends and girlfriends have sex. You know Yeonjun must have done it with all his previous girlfriends. It would’ve been weird if you didn’t. 

Not that Yeonjun pressured you to do it or anything. But you know he wanted it. You wanted it too. You just couldn’t get Beomgyu out of your head. Which is why it’s good that you’re finally doing this–smothering that last candle you were holding out for him. 

“You’re tensing again, doll.” Yeonjun tells you, kissing your neck. “Not that I don’t enjoy it. It feels like heaven when you squeeze down on my cock like that, but I want this to feel good for you too.” 

Yes, it’s the right thing to do this… right? 

“Okay…” You breathe, trying to relax and focus on the moment, letting your muscles unclench as Yeonjun presses his cock in and out of you. 

Once you’re sufficiently relaxed, you start to actually feel good again, his cock feeling much better than your fingers ever did. It reaches places inside you that you never could by yourself. It’s so thick and long, dragging along your walls and stimulating those sensitive spots inside you that make your toes curl. 

“Yeah, you like that, baby?” He drawls, taking note of the moans you were now letting out but he still takes it slow. 

You breath hitches, his words too closely resembling what Beomgyu had said to you before, and for a split second you see Beomgyu over you instead of Yeonjun, his long hair tickling your face and his intense gaze burning you up. 

“Yeonjun–” You gasp, digging your fingers into his arms. “Harder, please.” 

Maybe if he fucks you harder, it’ll push Beomgyu out of your brain. Maybe if he fucks you harder, you could mistake his casual affection for the raw passion you crave. 

“Are you sure, doll?” He asks, concerned. 

“Yes, please, Yeonjun. Fuck me hard.” You insist, hoping your eyes convey how much you need it. 

“Your wish is my command, baby.” He grabs your thighs, pressing them against the sides of your body and getting on top of you, driving his dick so deep inside you it makes you throw your head back in a long, choked out moan. 

But he doesn’t let up, fucking into you again and again, bullying his cock into your virgin pussy at a brutal pace until you have no more breath to scream, and then he fucks you more. 

“Baby, you with me?” Yeonjun pants, not letting up. 

“Isss good….” You mumble, brain short-circuiting, caught by the fire spreading from your pussy to set your body alight. “S-so good.” 

You vaguely hear him laugh through his own grunts, “Good girl, just lay back and let me make you feel good.” 

You nod, tears brimming at your eyelashes at the overwhelming feeling. But you love it, the burning pleasure making its way through your body and making you forget about anyone else but Yeonjun. 

“Junnie… soooo good…. Too g-good...” You cry, your pussy fluttering around his cock as it hammers in and out of you, your legs trying to slam together to take a break from the excessive pleasure, but they can’t. Not when Yeonjun’s hold on you is so bruising, his hips keeping at that brutal pace that makes you unable to even string along a full sentence.

“You asked for it, doll. Now be good and take it.” He grunts, bending down to pluck one of your nipples into his mouth, his teeth lightly grazing the sensitive nub. 

“No–no—Junnie!” You scream, unable to take it anymore, your pussy clamping down on his cock as your whole body shudders with a blinding orgasm. 

“Oh, fuck–baby, baby, I’m cumming.” Yeonjun groans, quickly taking his cock out as he cums on your belly, and replacing it with his fingers when you start crying at the emptiness. 

“I got you, doll. I got you.” He murmurs, pumping his fingers in and out of you as he milks his cock of the last drops of his orgasm–letting you both down gently. 

When you start squirming at the overstimulation–the fires retreating from your brain–he pulls his fingers out and bends down to kiss you. “It’s okay, baby. You did really well.” 

You look up at him, the insecurity creeping back in again now that the mind-numbing pleasure is gone. “Did you like it? Did you like m-me?” 

Were you good? Did you live up to his past lovers? Were you supposed to do something more? Be more proactive? Did he enjoy his time?

He chuckles. “Yes. You were great, baby. You felt so good.” He reassures you simply, pressing a kiss against your forehead. 

“Okay.” His answer doesn't really give you the reassurance you needed. You don’t even know what you need him to do or say, but you know he’s not giving it to you. And he notices. 

“You okay, doll?” He asks, giving you a skeptical look and you nod. “Yeah.” 

He doesn’t appear to be convinced by your answer. “Are you sure? Wanna take a shower?” 

You shake your head, getting off the bed and beginning to dress yourself up again. “No, that’s okay. I can take a shower at home.”

“Home? You’re not staying over?” He gives you a look of confusion which you reciprocate. “Oh. I don’t know. Do you want me to?” 

You blink at him, genuinely unsure. You didn’t want to presume anything. You don’t have experience doing this. You don't know if you’re supposed to stay or if it’s too soon. 

“Of course. I’m not just gonna make you go home after we fucked.” He chuckles, pulling you back down to the bed. “You have to stay the night.” 

“I don’t know…” You hesitate.  If you stay, Beomgyu will probably know what you've done. He'll know that you and Yeonjun had sex. But if you leave you'd be choosing Beomgyu again. You need to let go of him. 

“Okay.” 

___________________

You end up having a nice time with Yeonjun once you get over your anxiety and trepidation of losing your virginity to someone other than Beomgyu. It's silly but you suppose on some level you thought you'd have your first time with him. 

And it's not just that. For a second you let the insecurity get to you and you wondered if Yeonjun would act differently now that you had sex. That he'd show his true face and break your heart, but he doesn’t. He is as sweet as ever, giving you some of his clothes and staying up in bed with you, having those precious pillow talks that are so important early in a relationship. 

He is easy to talk to, and when he does that cute thing where he scrunches his nose up and pokes his tongue out as he's teasing you, it makes your heart flutter. 

You find out that singing isn’t his only passion--that dancing is his first love. He even gets up out of the cozy comfort of the bed to show you a few dance moves when you whine and insist he shows you. You watch him with a big smile on your face as he executes them so well even in his bedroom, his movements so fluid yet precise, it’s mesmerizing. And when he’s done he smiles that sweet smile of his and lunges back into bed with you and you take him into your arms as if he could actually belong there. 

It was so unlike how he usually is on stage and in front of others that it tugs in your heartstrings a bit, making you feel special for being allowed to witness this. 

You fall asleep in his arms and wake up in his arms, forgetting about that aching feeling of emptiness in the center of your chest for a few blissful hours. 

And in the morning you even make breakfast together. Or more like he makes you breakfast while you make coffee. 

“Oh, man. I haven’t had a proper breakfast in sooo long.” You moan, digging into the omelet and sausages he made you. 

“You don’t cook?” He asks, smiling as he watches you eat. 

“Nope. Me and Beomgyu are hopeless. We’ve almost burned the kitchen too many times that now we don’t even bother.” 

“Then what do you guys eat?” 

“Frozen goods and slimy take-out. We’re building a formidable gut microbiome. We’re actually part of the country’s biological weapons program.” 

Yeonjun laughs. “Well, sorry for ruining your trajectory by feeding you actual food.” 

“Ah, well, Beomgyu can carry the torch by himself.” You shrug, mouth full of food. 

“You guys are really close, huh?” He asks, and the mood grows a bit gloomy. You chew slowly, thinking your words through before answering. “Yeah, he’s my best friend.”

“He’s more than that though, isn’t he?” He pushes and you hesitate. 

Once again, you know exactly what he's asking, and you’re faced with a decision to make between an uncertain future with Yeonjun, nurturing a candlelight that is so shaky it might get snuffed out at any moment, or live on hopes and dreams with Beomgyu, praying for the sun to break out from behind the clouds after years of waiting for it to no avail. 

“No.” You finally say, looking up at him, trying to be decisive, hoping it will come naturally with time. “No, he’s not. Not anymore. We’ve agreed to be exclusive, you and I, and I’m serious about it.” 

Yeonjun's smile is slow, cautious. “Good to hear.”

Do either of you actually believe it? Do you really think you can move on from Beomgyu? You don’t know but you know that you have to try and you know that you'd like to try with Yeonjun. 

________________________________

Still, heading home you feel uneasy. Like you'd done something wrong you’re going to get punished for, and so to ease the guilt and tension, you grab something on the way with you–just some donuts and coffee, a small token of peace, knowing Beomgyu would be hungry and that the best way to get into his good graces is to offer him junk food. It's not like he was going to make himself breakfast or anything anyway. 

When you step into the apartment, you find him sitting on the couch just as you had expected. 

“Wanna eat? I got you your favorite donuts.” You wave the food next to your head in lieu of a greeting.

He stares at you for a few seconds, not saying anything. Shit, does he know? Can he see it on you? Probably, since you’re still wearing Yeonjun’s clothes. 

But he just says, “Sure.” and makes room for you on the couch. 

You accept it gladly, watching as he takes the donuts out and offers you some. “No, thanks, I already ate.” 

Once again, he pauses, studying you for a second before looking away and taking a bite of his donut.  

“Ugh, I was starving. This is the real stuff.” He groans and you grin. "Yeah. This is food as God intended it, processed and fried until it barely resembles food." You hum in agreement, making him giggle.

For a second you think you're off the hook. For a second you think things can just be normal like he wanted. But then he asks you something that stops you cold.  

"How was the date?"

You study his expression, trying to decipher a hidden agenda in the question. Is this a trick? Is he asking just so he can say something mean about it? Is he going to act vindictive once you tell him how it went?

But he looks genuinely curious to your scrutinizing eyes, and so you decide to just tell him the truth. "Ugh, awful. You know how completely unaware I am of my surroundings? Well, I started criticizing this one photo and the photographer was standing right behind me."

Beomgyu gasps, a piece of food flying out of his mouth at you. "No! What did he say?" 

You brush it off in disgust. "He said I was a nobody." 

Beomgyu's face twists up in anger as he puts the food down. "What the fuck? He said that?"

"Well, I said it and he just confirmed it." You explain sheepishly, still feeling the sting of the humiliation even now. "He said he has all these awards and I have nothing and never will and he won't listen to someone like me." 

"He's a fucking idiot.” Beomgyu rages, immediately jumps to your defense, “What, he thinks just because he has awards that he's the only one who can have an opinion? You know most of these awards are just rich people smelling their own farts, right? Real talent like yours cannot be measured."

Beomgyu is as fiercely defensive of you as he has always been and it brings a small smile to your face. However, the wound that the encounter opened up is still raw and just that isn’t enough to make you feel better. 

"Well, I wish it would be measured a little bit. You know we've both been doing this for years but while your band is getting bigger and bigger–and I'm so happy for you–I seem to be getting nowhere." You tell him glumly. You haven’t gotten any recognition for your work even though you work your ass off, dreaming up concepts, executing them to the best of your ability, and trying to get someone to notice. 

"Hey, hey, you will. I am certain of it. No one this talented can go unseen for long. They will notice you one day and they will be blown away." He scoots closer to you, holding your face in his warm hands and caressing your cheeks lovingly. "And hey, if all else fails, you always have that backup plan of being our main stylist and photographer. Me and Yeonjun will make sure of it. And not as a sympathy job either but because we truly believe in you."

"You would work with Yeonjun again for me?" You ask, touched. Beomgyu has been very stand-offish with Yeonjun ever since you started dating him. He only interacts with him the bare minimum to still allow the band to function. It’s not ideal but at least they’re not fighting anymore. 

"I would do anything for you." He smiles at you, the smile not quite reaching his sad eyes. 

Has his eyes always looked like this? So melancholic? Still, you feel comfort looking into them. You feel love and familiarity. You feel home. 

You do your best not to tear up, knowing if you let that dam crumble you'll end up saying things you'll regret. So you hold it together, despite how much you ache to throw yourself in his arms. You missed this. You missed him. You miss what you wish you could be. 

But then he takes his hand away and asks quietly, “Did you spend the night with him?”

“Yes.” You admit in a small voice, heart hammering against your chest.

“Got it.” He says simply, and it’s somehow worse than him getting angry. There is a sense of loss there that you can’t explain but it aches, deep and inaccessible. 

“Thanks for the food.” He says, getting up and throwing the rest of it in the trash. 

"Wait. Where are you going?” You ask when you see him heading for the door. 

“Out.” He says simply, seeming to be in a hurry to leave but you’re not ready to let him go yet. “Can't you stay for a bit?" 

"I'm sorry. I've got something to get to. But I'll catch up with you later, okay?" He doesn’t even wait for you to answer before he’s out of the door. 

“Okay.” You mumble quietly to yourself, letting the tears fall freely, having no reason to hide them anymore. 

_____________________________

A/N: AHHHH two more chapter left. the end is nigh and only one boy can win. as always feedback gives me the motivation to write and upload faster. also just to let you know i will be giving patreon a try and an alternative ending to this fic will be published with the losing boy there.

Back to our regularly scheduled programming. which boy do you want oc to end up with (voting has no bearing on the final results though i guess now it doesn't matter because we'll have an alternative ending anyway)

Taglist: @blxxsss @sanasour @tinkw1nks @lol6sposts @zuzuhasablog @beomsl @seolis-world @stantxtorurmissingout @wonwooz1@yaorzu-blog@allylikesdabee@rkivezzs@malieno @leviathanlee26 @yomomas-stuff @kurisaiyunobara @girlwholovekpop @zuzuhasablog @viaaasdiary @ho3forkpop @skzvcr @th3-3d3n-g4rd3n @izzyexe @boomfrogg @kpop-cakepops-recs @chronicallygyu @girlwholovekpop

[safely-in-vhagars-belly]

Daddy dearest (Rhaenyra/Harwin Daughter x Darkish Daemon Targaryen) (READER OR OC)

🔷Summary: You are Rhaenyra's and Harwin's daughter and you just proposed to Aemond, your stepdaddys worst enemy.

WORDCOUNT: 2159

🔷Author's note: This was a request, this is my first Daemon fic so i hope i did him justice without turning him into a carebear or a scary pookie.

🔷Warnings: Oc/reader is a brat, reader has clear empathy issues, reader has a daddy kink (liiiiiterallly) targcest!, dark!daemon, smut, p in v, fucking, desk fucking, choking, slut-shaming, high-treason, cheating, (daemon) slight gore, and dom/sub themes.

There is something about Targaryens that makes them a little more dangerous than other families. You have always known that. But there is something about you that makes you a little more dangerous than most Targaryens. 

Like a dragon, you wish to be close to the fire, letting it consume your everything while you hiss at your pain. You always enjoyed creating drama and orchestrating plots. You have been good at it. 

So, when your one-eyed uncle, Aemond Targaryen one day writes a sobby letter where he confesses his love and devotion to you, regrets killing your little brother, and vows that he will love you from the end of his days, it is not the prospect of peace that makes you happy. It is the prospect of war.

You write back, of course you do. You appeal to Aemond’s pride, his titles, his ‘’beauty’’ and most of all: His ego. You assume that the two of you will be married soon, should your mother wish it. Everything to avoid the war.

You happily brush your hair, thinking of all the good things that will hopefully happen to your family now. You love wearing your hair on a side-braid, the way Visenya wore hers.

You have just finished preparing for the day to come when your stepfather, Daemon Targaryen barges into your rooms. You don’t bow or greet him, instead you just smirk at his furious expression and red worked up cheeks. You fold your hands on your back and raise your chin with an innocent smirk. ‘’You seem upset.’’ You speak, your voice cheerful.

Daemon hands you an opened letter. You briefly scan the words and sigh, noticing the familiar awfully nauseating perfect handwriting of Aemond Targaryen. He brags to Daemon about ‘’Seducing’’ you and that you ‘’soon will be pregnant with child.’’ Inwardly, you roll your eyes, but you did suspect that Aemond would write Daemon about his ‘’conquest’’ of you. Of course he would. That is why you picked Aemond in the first place. He thinks you are being conquered but in reality he is a pawn in a plot he has no clue of. He is as a sheep being lured in the wolf’s den, unaware he is about to be slaughtered.

But you don’t let Daemon see your disgust at this, kinslayer waving his win in his rival’s face.  Daemon is very worried for your safety. ‘’Are you insane, courting him? Have you forgotten what that child murderer did to our family?’’ As much as you miss Lucerys, you won’t kill yourself or others for his dead chewed up corpse. Luc would want everyone to get along and to make peace, not war. Which is why he died, as it is a very foolish way of handling enemies. You feel indifferent about his loss. You miss a bit, but you won’t trade a limb back for him.

You hand him the letter back. ‘’Yes. I am betrothed. Aren’t you happy for me?’’ It is almost funny how quickly his emotions change from utter rage and murder, to disappointment, to heartbreak and finally how all his emotion die and only a mask remains.

He becomes silent. The only thing you hear is the betrayal of your own heart beating. ‘’With Aemond?’’ He asks, now a bit calmer than previously. ‘’You know you can get much better.’’ He says. You don’t know who he refers to.

You roll your eyes. ‘’No, with Aegon. Of course with Aemond!’ You know he hates it when you roll your eyes.

‘’What the fuck do you mean with ‘’of course’’?’’’You giggle inwardly.

You blink rapidly, innocently.

‘’Daddy dearest, don’t cuss please. It’s very peasant-like. Aren’t you happy I’m finally engaged? You tried so hard to find a good suitor for me.’’ You grin.

‘’Your mother and I should choose your suitor! Have you thought about any of us during these games with Aemond?’’ More than he would ever know. 

You sigh, lying easily.

‘’I will be honest, you haven’t both been on my mind very much.’’

You need a final push. You are so close. ‘’Daddy dearest, me and Aemond are meant to be. Soon I’ll carry his babies for him and make him a father when I polish his creepy sapphire eye for him while he breeds me as if I am livestock. You either adjust-’’ That is pushing it too far, part of you just knows it. You can see when you cross a line and you just did that. You see a reflection of danger and insanity in the eyes of Daemon, the man you’ve yearned for so long. 

He grabs you violently by the throat, and you squeak pathetically when he drags you with him. Daemon has lost his patience with you and drags you with him as if you are a toy. ‘’Not another word. No one is breeding you. Not him at least.’’ With a push you are on your back, on your writing desk. Daemon throws several of your books and your quills on the ground, bending you under him. You pretend to groan but your lips are curled up in a smile, when he removes your smallclothes, pulling them down and exposing your body to him. 

His big hands grab each of your asscheeks when you hiss in anticipation. He releases his anger on your poor behind but you can’t say that you mind. If anything, you love it. You wait for Daemon to finish his spanking before turning on your desk, revealing your other entrance to him. A glistering wet and needy entrance. ‘’Aemond rides the biggest dragon. Do you think his cock is the biggest too? I read something about men with funny noses-’’ You will never finish the sentence.

Your head is smashed down and you finally feel Daemon’s experienced hands touch your so eager cunt. You whimper, weak and softly when he takes a stance behind you, and you clench yourself when you hear the sound of his belt being removed. ‘’You want a man to breed you, you horny little slut? You want to be fucked and owned as a whore? Fine with me.’’ He groans in your ear when spitting in your face. You recoil in brief disgust before your legs are spread wide and open and his cock is forced deep inside of you, causing you to grunt against the wood of the desk. Daemon yanks you up by your arms, fucking you without speaking. You become a little light in the head as pleasure mixes inside of you, and you can’t believe it's finally happening. His cock feels good to have inside of you and once again you clench, needy as a whore.

Daemon grins in your ear when noticing your little cries and gasps of pleasure. ‘’You wish to be bred, little girl? You wish for your Kepa to make you his little whore?’’ He grins, using his Valyrian accent for that one word. You become even more aroused because of that and moan, weakly. Daemon sinks in back inside of you, pulling you up so he can fuck you when you lay on your desk. Your wooden deks cracks of the movements as Daemon takes your maidenhead on it, not giving a fuck for your sore museles or your begs. 

‘’Daemon…’’

You are close to your heights. There are days just like these when you touch yourself, imagining it was him all along. And now he is, taking you as his spoils and fucking you the way a conquerer takes his spoils. You beg. ‘’Daemon..’’ You are spanked another time, this time on your cunny that is brutally fucked at the same time. You cry out in pain and glare at Daemon who simply smirks back at you, before dragging his nails into your skin, forcing you back on his cock for another good, but painful ride. You become used to the pain, and to the feeling of having a man inside of you. It is better than everything you ever did to yourself. ‘’Kepa, please…’’ You beg, pathetically. 

Your stepfather has no mercy for you, grinning as if you are his enemy and this is your end. ‘’You are a little greedy whore. I won’t finish you off. The only one who comes is me, little Princess. Your Kepa will put a child inside your belly, perhaps that will teach you some respect.’’ He vows, riling you up against his cock until you nearly come.

You become even more aroused, fighting your desires and the urge to ride his cock. ‘’What if I’m not with child?’’ You ask, knowing you will like the answer very much.

Daemon pauses, the cock half inside of you, taunting you, torturing you. ‘’Then I simply must return and fuck you the way a dog fucks his bitch until you are, won’t I?’’ He breaths out, before taking you again on the desk. You are taken now quicker, faster and can barely keep up. Your cries become louder and freer and Daemon needs to wrap his free hand around your mouth to silence you when his cock fucks your body sore. The thrusts become rougher and more dominate and Daemon hits you again, and again and again on your ass when fucking you sore and likely very bloody. Yet you cry in approval, beg without words and plead for more by slowly grinding back against his body.

You see a determination that is very arousing in his eyes. He grabs your hips, impales you with his cock, all the way in and fucks you harshly and more animalstic than before. You lose count of how many he times he fucks you, but when he is finished, you can hear him grunt and you know his cum is inside your body right now. You remain on the desk, frozen, half undressed, and needy and naked.

Daemon grabs you by your throat once more, moving you to your bed. He throws you on it, grabbing a pillow. You protest but are turned on your stomach. He presses your face in the pillow so your cries can’t be heard and whispers in your ear. ‘’You’re going to become such a marvelous little mother for my son, Princess. Yes you will.’’ He murmurs against your belly. You whimper wordlessly.

His cock finds your body again and is pushed all the way in, when he kisses your hair and fucks you gently this time. ‘’Come for Kapa. Show me what a pretty obedient slave you can be for me.’’He whispers. You feel it build as he fucks you harder and harder and as your eyes close you cry out in the pillow he forces you on your mouth, soaking it in the process when Daemon fucks you when you scatter around him, breaking into million of pieces. 

Satisfied with your state, Daemon removes the pillow and looks at your wet, but bloodied cunny. ‘’Such a good slut for Kepa.’’ He tells you with a smirk. You pant still in denial that that happened. He pats your belly next. You lean in and want to kiss him. ‘’Kepa..’’

But he pulls away, disgusted all of a sudden and angry. ‘’You will write to Aemond today. You will invite him to an inn somewhere close and you will seduce him. I want him to think mine child is his. I want to be there, when you reveal to him you played him and I want to see his pathetic little mind break at the betrayal you and me pulled on him.’’ He grins. You nod, absently. 

‘’What if I don’t want to fuck Aemond?’’ You have seen the man and he seems very boring in the sheets, almost as boring as he is in the streets.

Daemon grabs you by your throat, choking you and you gasp, but you feel a different connection to him now. He seeded and sored you. He made you his in a way and you are now his little princess. ‘’Did I fuck your brains out, little dumb princess?’’ He groans out. 

You are shocked as you gasp for air, worried it ends there for you. ‘’K-Kepa…’’

He sighs at your stupidity. ‘’You will fuck Aemond, you’ll be a needy little slut for him and fuck the shrimp he calls a cock, and you’ll pretend your baby is his.’’ What does that even accomplish?

‘’But we don’t know yet if I am even pregnant!’ You whisper distraught by the idea of bedding your uncle.

Daemon smirks. ‘’One of these days, you will be. I have had a taste of you, princess and I will be back. Your mother is not cutting it for me anymore. She is the love of my life, but love only does so much.’’ He speaks, petting your cheeks when you silently cry. 

‘’Go make Aemond happy. Then we will destroy him. Together.’’ He promises you, with a kiss on your lips.

A/N

Aemond, thinking he has a pure valyrian woman waiting for him that will help him destory daemon:

HE HAS NO IDEA-

Yeah this was fun! Actually a lot of fun. I hope you guys liked it!!!

If you did be sure to let me knoww xxxx

[backseatsoldier]

"Broken", Not Stupid - 11: Johnny!

Pairing: alpha!Simon "Ghost" Riley x unusual omega!OC (13)

CW: Oemgaverse; cult-like situation; dehumanization; selling children to a cult

Author's Note: Ope, forgot to add this- just wanted to drop a reminder that 13 has an ask blog now! @ask13-cod :D she'll ocassionally reblog bits of her story but will mostly be answering any asks <3 currently she's open to name suggestions!

"Johnny can be... a lot."

Simon's voice pulls me from my thoughts and I turn to look at him.

"Is that why you're so worried about making sure I'm ok with having him there today?"

"Yeah, mostly. That and you've only recently met me. Another alpha so soon could be a lot." He pauses, glancing at me. "If he gets to be too much, just let me know."

"I'm capable of setting my own boundaries," I snort, smilng. "But I understand why you're offering. It's your job as my alpha and all that."

Just as I turn to face the road again, I see Simon's forehead crease. Did I say something wrong? It is his job as my alpha to step in where I can't. Why is saying that out loud upsetting?

Eh. He'll bring it up if it's really a problem.

But what if I truly upset him?

The omega in my head paws at her enclosure and I scowl slightly. I am so not in the mood for her today so I push her back further.

What the hell do they feed these guys?!

"Johnny," the Scotsman grins down at me as he greets me. "Nice to meet you, 13."

"It's nice to meet you too," I greet him from slightly behind Simon.

I'm not entirely sure why I'm back here, honeslty. Johnny seems really nice. Even if he seems a bit like he's buzzing with energy - as expected from what Simon said earlier.

"Alright?" Simon asks me as soon as Johnny's attention is drawn to a candy wall in the shop.

"Yes?"

"What's wrong?" Simon insists, eyebrows creasing together just enough to notice.

"I don't know? Just... nervous, I guess?" I offer hesitantly.

Maybe it's the knowledge that this is Simon's best friend and I'm supposed to be Simon's omega so there's this... need for approval.

No.

No, absolutely not. I don't need anyone's approval. What the hell was that? Damn omega brain.

"I'm fine. What's our first to-do?"

Simon studies me quietly for a moment before nodding toward the rest of the shop.

"Figured you might want to find yourself some clothes of your own. There's a few shops available for it, and for supplies for your nest. I'm not sure when you'll start your-"

"We can talk about that later and not in public," I cut him off abruptly and glance around the shop to see if anybody noticed what he was on about.

"Understood," he says with a firm nod. "I'm not good with fashion, but if you'd like input I can try."

I shrug at him and wander toward the nearest rack of clothes to slowly flip through them. This shop is full of... bright colors. Nothing is really catching my interest, honestly, but I continue looking just in case.

Toward the back of the store, there's a small circle rack of light grey tshirts. I begin thumbing through the different prints before coming across a tshirt with a white crescent moon printed on it. A smile spreads across my face as I hold it up. It's has a light and soft, cotton-y texture and the sleeves are cuffed.

"This one," I say with a bright smile.

"Pastels not your thing?" Johnny asks from next to Simon.

I shake my head, still smiling as I admire the shirt.

"Not really," I agree and turn toward Simon. "Can I get-"

"Anything that'll make you more comfortable," he says quickly, almost like he wouldn't hear any argument about what I get or, more accurately, don't get. "There's a shop next door with far less pastels. We'll get this one and find you some more options, yeah?"

"Thank you," I tell him, sincerity thick in my voice.

"Ah, don't be like that, lass! He's just doing his best and making sure you're all set up. Right, Simon?" Johnny says just before getting nudged in the ribs and glared at by Simon.

When Simon turns back to me, his expression - what I can see of it - is softer than usual. There's usually a neutrality to all of him with the occassional crinkle in the corner of his eyes from what I assume is a smile. In this moment he seems... genuinely happy. Maybe even content.

That's good.

I think?

Masterlist | CoD Masterlist | Part One

Tag List: @lucienofthelakes @lostintransist @demothers-empty-blog @scaredyspooks @tessakate @one-really-annoying-tree-rat @nerdyphantomtheorist @gazsluckyhat @peanutismynickname

[lilghostiequinni]

Sick & Injured

Main Masterlist Lando Masterlist

Pairing: Reserve Driver!female oc (Alessia) x Lando Norris

Warnings: Fluffy, Established relationship, Injury

Summary: She's a reserve driver for McLaren and was called upon when Oscar had fallen ill, now he's done something to get injured that he physically can't be in the race for most of the rest of the season, McLaren understands this and tells him, it's okay and nothing will jeopardize his current contract because stuff happens. But she's called upon again to take Oscar's place, per his request.

Requested: NO / yes

It started with the race in Australia, Oscar didn't feel the greatest going into FP1, but raced anyway, then before FP2 was determined to be unable to race because of illness.

Oscar was told he wouldn't be able to race for the rest of the weekend, and before anyone could get to a reserve driver Oscar asked for Alessia Maes, a Belgian-Peruvian driver driving under the Peruvian flag.

She had the chance to be a driver before but turned it down saying she was fine driving for free practices and as a reserve driver, not wanting all the glory that comes with being a full time Formula One driver.

When she was told that Oscar asked for her to drive in his home race, she at first refused, but with some convincing she did race in FP3 and for Qualis, ending P6.

She raced on Sunday for the actual race too, many fans were rather confused as to why she was racing and not Oscar, many were mad or upset that Oscar wasn't racing, many happy that a female driver was racing in a Grand Prix.

Before the race on Sunday, McLaren took to social media saying that Oscar was sick and unable to race and that Alessia Maes would be taking his place over the weekend.

When fans learned Oscar was sick, they sent the support to him, and supported the driver they were told Oscar requested.

They learned that Oscar requested her, though his own social media profiles, with him saying, "Sadly, I am unable to race for the rest of the weekend, but the reserve driver of Alessia Maes will be taking my place for the weekend, per my request as she and I have become great friends in the last two years and I have no doubt in her skills as a driver."

So, with fan support, Alessia Maes made P3 behind Lando and Max, P1 and P2 respectively.

After the weekend many fans supported her on being a driver when Oscar couldn't, or Lando.

In Shanghai, Oscar returned to the Grid as Alessia went back into the garage.

During the week of Japan, Oscar was again unable to compete in the race weekend, this time it was some injury he had sustained falling from his bike when he went biking with Alessia and Lando, Lily too.

Fans speculated that Alessia intentionally pushed him off the bike to get his spot, but when the video from McLaren came out the next day after it was announced that Oscar couldn't compete in Japan fans realized that she was ahead of Oscar and wasn't anywhere near him when he fell.

But she did warn about the spot in which Oscar fell at.

It was seen in the video that Alessia came straight over when Oscar yelled out in pain.

Fans realized it was Alessia who told the camera crew to turn off the cameras and help get Oscar to a car.

It was on social media that fans learned that Alessia originally didn't want to drive in place of Oscar and that Oscar told her to.

It was also on social media that Oscar announced he wouldn't be driving for the rest of the season saying, "I will not be driving for the rest of the season, the injury from biking put me out for about 5 months, which would be some time around Monza. The amount of time I would need after to help fully recover is another 2 months, leaving only 4 races left in the season from there. So, I have made the decision that while, I will be in the garage sometime to help, but not drive that I have recommended Alessia Maes as my replacement for the season, a driver that has already scored points towards the championship."

For the rest of the season Alessia did PR and races in Oscar's place, scoring ahead of Mac Verstappen in some places and behind him in other's with Lando taking P1 in many races.

With the final race in Abu Dhabi, she scored P3 with Lando P1 Max P2.

Getting 3rd in the World Championship overall with only one point between her and Max Verstappen.

At the World Championship ceremony Lando proposed to his girlfriend of 2 years, Alessia Maes.

Afterwards many fans went back through videos and photos with her to see if there was any indication that the two were together

A/N: I used the 2025 calendar for this.

Tags: @poppyflower-22 @samantha-chicago @barcelonaloverf1life @tallrock35 @hellothere9597

If you want to be removed from a tag list, let me know so I don't keep tagging you. If you are striked through, I don't know if you want to be tagged, but just let me know if you want me to continue or stop

[valgeristik]

'Tis the dragon age season, and i am here with a DA Oc Lore Post.

Not about every single one of them (yet? question mark?) but a general...timeline. Mostly about Zea and Lora. An explanation of why i keep saying 'its honestly a wonder Zea turned out as well adjusted as they did'

putting it under the cut 👍 it got LONG (also, Veilguard Spoilers Tm closer to the end of the text, so uve been warned)

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So basically, in my heart in my mind all three of my DAO wardens exist at the same time:

Lora (elf mage), Nikolai (dwarf commoner) and Noel (human noble)

(for those unfamiliar with DAO, each of those have their own origin story. i linked the wiki but tbh tbh tbh i highly recommend playing DAO for urself instead. is it old with old graphics? yes. is it an absolute banger regardless? YES.

I tweaked a few things here n there for each of the backstories, but maybe i'll elaborate on that in a separate post. who knows!)

Anyway. Somewhere along the way the team would come across a village in the middle of a darkspawn attack. They get there early enough to save some people, but too late to save the village itself. You know, Blight things.

This is where they'd find Zea, who survived only because, well, turns out they're a mage! and the magic got triggered by the fact that they were sosososo scared. They are also 5 years old at that point in time.

Lora is the one who finds them, which is fortunate, because they DO try to hit her with some lightning. Which she's well-practiced with redirecting. (u know those big AOE elemental spells you can get in DAO? my main tactic while playing as Lora was to just stack those three on top of each other. So.)

Anyway, she calms them down n gets them out of the building that used to be their home. Whatever family they had is dead, and Lora does realize that

1. Zea is a mage

2. and also an elf

So the chances of them being raised in a nice loving environment are pretty low. And let's be honest, Lora would feel incredibly opposed to the idea of this little kid suffering any more than they already did (<- already getting attached)

It's like finding a blind baby bird on the ground and not being able to put it back in the nest.

Zea would also immediately latch onto Lora as the first like. Adult that they can rely on now that their own mother is gone. (i have not thought about their family too much, but leaning towards the idea that they were being raised by a single mother. )

Lora would make them feel safe, even if she isn't the best parental figure, being 19 (JUST had her Harrowing) and this being her first time in her memory that she gets to leave the mage tower and travel the world. And, you know, having to help stop the Blight. She's got a lot going on.

The initial plan is to either find someone in some town who could help, or give Zea to the dalish, possibly. Wynne suggests the mage circle, but Lora is very much against it, for reasons mentioned above. (and some others. like the fact that the Fereldan mage circle was just completely fucking wrecked.)

But they don't find anyone in town, and by the time they get to the dalish everyone kind of decides that it's not been too bad, actually, and maybe the kid should stay with them. Especially because Zea would probably (definitely) cry a lot if they were to be left somewhere with yet another bunch of unfamiliar people.

Zea is pretty much being raised communally. Nikolai is actually the one who's the best at being a parental figure, as Lora...again, does not think of herself as a parent for the longest time. (Which, who can blame her, really)

And Noel is. Well. Noel.

A brief aside.

Zea, being 5, is old enough to remember things from before the darkspawn attack. They would know

their name and surname

exactly two lines from a song their mother used to sing to them when they were scared or upset

enough of their childhood for the memories of it to haunt them on n off forever ✌️

along with other things that will fade away with time, like their mother's face and what her voice sounded like. etc.

Anyway, that is to say, they will develop a habit of singing those two lines from the song to themself when they need to calm down or distract themself or the like. A self-soothing method, if u will. (<- link to a thing i drew about it)

I have this image in my head of this toddler noticing that Lora is having a rough time at some point (maybe just got woken up by one of those archdemon nightmares) and coming over to sing it to her....because even at that young age, they want to help (foreshadowing)

(the song is actually this one bcs those two lines got stuck in my head while i was playing DATV for the first time n then i was like hey. i could use that....... the specific lines are from 0:37 - 0:49, if u care)

Anyway.

The wardens do what wardens do and end the 5th Blight. Yuppie!

The group splits, with some going their own ways, and some sticking together.

Nikolai and Alistair become like the Normal Uncles to Zea, who occasionally babysit them when Lora is off in the deep roads or whatever.

As for their primary caretakers. well.

My opinions have changed many times over the years regarding the question of Who Would Lora Romance.

At first the answer was. No one.

And then i thought it would be really funny if it was Zevran.

And THEN i thought that it would be even funnier if Noel was their occasional third.

She is the cool aunt who comes over a few times a year to give Zea the most expensive ass gift and to flirt with their parents and then fuck off again.

So Zea is essentially being raised by Thedas' weirdest polycule.

No wonder they can't help but disrespect authority. And. Well. [gestures vaguely in their direction] Other Things.

Now, you can sigh with relief, i'm not going to describe every year that follows.

But there are a few Key Events.

1: The Accident

As mentioned before, Lora did not really consider herself a parent. She wasn't cold to Zea or anything, but she did not take a lot of responsibility, and also did not consider how much her actions and demeanor might influence Zea. Who, let's be honest, would kind of end up idolizing the lot of them, but Lora especially.

So, a couple of years after DAO ends (or maybe During? I haven't quite decided yet, but it's before they turn 8), Zea gets it into their head to try and imitate not-mama.

They've seen her stand in the middle of a lightning storm she summoned on the battlefield, and they were like. Well, lightning kinda comes easier than other things, so let me try that too!

And it goes terribly wrong.

They end up almost dying, but Lora is quick enough to react and get them help. (Which, it had to have been someone else. Maybe Wynne. Because I don't think Lora would know or be any good at healing magic, and I'm SURE she felt so normal about that fact in that moment.)

And this is the event that really hits her over the head with the realization of just how much influence she has on the kid.

So, when Zea recovers, Lora takes it upon herself to teach them how to use magic Properly. Which, hey, ends up working out great.

This is kind of a pivotal moment for her, because she realized just how attached she's gotten, and how easy it would be to lose them. And if she becomes a bit over-protective for the next few years...well. Who Can Blame Her.

This is the moment when she starts thinking of herself as a parent.

2: The Talk (the birds and the. archdemon blood)

As mentioned previously, and even several times, I believe, Zea would idolize Lora and the others, and by extension, would think that grey wardens are the coolest people in Thedas.

Zea is also what I would describe as a bright-eyed idealist. They want to leave the world a better place. They want to help people. And most of all, they want to prevent what happened in their home village from happening again, wherever they can.

They also think their mama is Stronger That God And Will Never Die, and they want to be just like her! 🤗

So they voice as much, when they are about 11-12. They tell Lora that they want to become a grey warden when they grow up.

Now, her plan for them was simple: she wants them to live a long and happy life. Which does not go hand-in-hand with being a warden. She also knows she won't be around forever, even if she's actively searching for a way to prevent the Calling. And also also, she couldn't give less of a shit about the secrecy of the order when it comes to her kid's safety.

So she tells them everything. From the Joining to the Calling, every little detail of being a warden, every drawback. She makes it sound as unappealing as possible, trying her best to discourage this dream of Zea's.

What she doesn't consider is the fact that...Well.

Even if they know they will suffer, they will do it anyway.

Zea has an uncommon relationship with death, lets say. They know that it will happen. To them, and to others. It's not something to be afraid of, necessarily, on the grand scale of things. Suffering must be prevented as much as possible, of course, but death itself does not bring suffering with it on it's own. And so, if they're going to die anyway, what's 30 years or so if they can help save so many more lives? To them, it sounds like a sweet deal.

Sure, they could dedicate their life to saving people in some other ways. But the topic of the blight and darkspawn is particularly personal.

And, knowing about the Calling now, they know that Lora will not be around by the time it's their turn, and so will not be hurt by it.

If they survive the Joining, that is, but eh. Details.

(Although they were fully aware they might die. And they prepared accordingly. With a letter to their family and all, in case things went bad.)

They join the wardens when they turn 20, without telling anyone.

Lora only finds out afterwards.

Obviously, she's not happy about it, but it's not like she can reverse it (yet?..).

So, they talk, they argue, they make peace, and she supports them as best she can, while also redoubling her efforts to find a way to prevent the Calling.

The events of Veilguard happen when Zea is 27.

(spoilers start here)

Lora and co. are in the south of Thedas, helping fight the blight there, and so they cannot come and help out.

And Zea doesn't want them to. They want to prove that they can handle it all on their own. They don't even tell their family that they're involved with All That until shit really hits the fan.

Even after Weisshaupt.

(They try writing a letter to Lora to tell her that they're alive, after. They can't finish it, because they hate how it keeps spiraling. They don't need her to come over and fix everything, they can stand on their own two feet, they have a Team, they WILL handle it.

But, damn, they do want that Mom Hug.)

Before all that, they never really encountered a situation in which they thought they will die. Not since they were 5.

It tests them, their bright-eyed idealism, their inherent urge towards kindness above all.

(Yes, they did punch the First Warden. And yes, they did feel incredibly bad for him once they found him in the underground Weisshaupt replica later. And yes, the memory of his death does haunt them sometimes, even if killing him was an act of kindness.)

But in the end, no matter how angry they were at Solas, or how much they wanted to punch him, too, they chose to talk him down instead.

Because, despite it all, they still want to leave the world better than they found it.

Thats it, thank you so much for attending this lecture 🫡

(and also, yes, Noel DOES teach Zea how to stab people so so so well. It's her own way of caring)

[foxyanon]

To Love A Dragon: Part 3

Since my birthday is in a couple days, here’s a gift from me to y’all! Something a bit lighter for my babies after the last depressive piece I released 😅 I do directly quote Season 2 Episode 2 in this, because let’s be real, ‘twas iconic on Sihtrics part

Summary: An oath is sworn, and a man put in his place.

Pairing: Sihtric Kjartansson x Rhaenerys Targaryen

Word Count: 2439

Rating: 18+, MDNI

TW: Eadred is a cunt, Rhaenerys is a bad bitch, otherwise there isn’t any major warnings here

Part 1, Part 2

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from The Last Kingdom or A Song of Ice And Fire nor do I own any of the images used. I only own my OC, Rhaenerys Targaryen.

Dividers by @arcielee and @zaldritzosrose

The next day, Guthred held a Witan, whatever that meant, in his hall and Rhaenerys stood in attendance with Ser Elwood at her side. She watched as the men bickered, the petty lords arguing with whether or not they should march to Eoferwic, claiming that they had no enemies in the city but that their lands would be left defenseless should they march with their king. The whole thing was rather entertaining to her, because she couldn’t imagine any lord in Westeros making such statements to her own father. Guthred kept speaking in that aggravating tone, the one where he was trying to portray authority but his voice kept cracking.

”Are we certain this man is actually a king and not the court jester?” Rhaenerys muttered under her breath, chuckling a little when Ser Elwood tsked at her. She glanced at him quickly and saw he had cracked a smile at her joke but was still trying to maintain a neutral expression.

She turned back to the crowd and listened as Uhtred claimed there was wealth aplenty in this city, as well as lands. Some fool in the back made a comment about women as well that had some others laughing, and Rhaenerys had to remind herself to keep her mouth shut at such a disgusting comment. Then of course Abbot Eadred gave some rousing speech about how their army was holy and they needed to liberate Eoferwic, that God is with them and so on. It did not go unnoticed by Rhaenerys that Guthred looked upset that he couldn't inspire the way the older man did. Even more interesting was the reaction from Uhtred and Guthred’s sister, Gisela. By the expressions on their faces, there was a more personal slight at Eadred’s comments.

Guthred approached her after everyone had been dismissed, his demeanor one of a man about to ask for something by beating around the bush. “So Princess, what do you think of Cumberland so far?” He asked, clasping his hands together.

She hummed, watching as the lords dispersed the hall in the early morning. “It is…very different from what I am used to,” she responded politely, wondering how long it would take him to get to his point. Blissfully, he got right to it.

”I was wondering if perhaps you might march with us? I should like to ask about your own home and perhaps discuss an alliance between our two kingdoms,” Guthred said, looking nervous despite him having been the one to reach out seeking a marriage with her. Even though she wanted to outright refuse his offer, she wouldn’t deny a certain curiosity at seeing this Eoferwic place and getting a better idea of the people in this land.

”I do not see why not, I should like to see more of this place and have my maesters archive as much as possible. Though, you understand I may not participate in any battle, yes? I cannot in good faith order my men to fight for another’s cause if there is nothing in it for them,” Rhaenerys said, laying some bait to see how he would react.

The man in front of her looked taken aback for a moment, before nodding his head and speaking once more. “Of course, Your Highness. As there is no official alliance between us, it is understandable you wish to do the proper thing. Perhaps a share of the spoils and even access to Church records? I understand you are something of a learned woman,” he spoke rather quickly, seeming a little desperate for more men in this fight.

Rhaenerys cocked a brow at Guthred before answering. “Yes, I do enjoy scholarly pursuits,” she corrected, trying not to bristle at him for his insult. She’s a scholar, equal to the men who use the title and not just a woman who wishes to learn. She shared a look with Ser Elwood, considering the offer. Nothing needed to be said between them, the subtle nod of her sworn shield all the confirmation she needed. “Very well, King Guthred. I accept your offer to march to Eoferwic and share in the win. Perhaps the journey will be enlightening for us all,” she said, knowing full well she was going to take that time learning about a certain currently imprisoned man.

Sihtric had been marched behind the wagon he was tied to, the body of Saint Cuthbert leading the procession at the front. They had only just begun the journey, stopping to make camp on the first day when he decided he needed to act. He had seen no sign of Lord Uhtred or the Princess Rhaenerys and he was not so sure Halig would get either of them without a little persuasion. He put his plan into motion the moment the nun wearing Tekils armor started approaching, the bag of heads in her hand.

”You! Girl!” Sihtric called out, only for Hild to ignore him.

“Woman!” No response.

“Warrior,” he said, sighing heavily. That got her attention, and she turned around to give him a look.

”I need to go into the woods there,” he started, Hild only arching a brow at him. “I need to shit,” again Hild only gave him an unimpressed look before turning around and continuing on her way. “I do not wish to fill my breeches!” He hollered, watching as Hild said something to Halig that had him and another man coming to take him into the woods.

Naturally they shoved him around, but he was used to it so he didn’t let that dissuade him from his plan. He dug a small hole to sell his story, Halig taking that time to ask about Dunholm fortress.

”It is tall,” he chuckled, unable to resist being snarky.

”Tell him that and you are a dead man,” Halig said with an incredulous laugh.

”Then let me speak to him.”

”He will speak to you when he is ready. He is a good man,” Halig said, the look in his eyes saying he spoke true.

Sihtric stood up, pretending like he was going to do his business and waited until the other men turned around before making his move. He was quick to knock the bigger man off his feet with the rope binding him, kicking Halig back to the ground and disarming the bigger man. Overall, the fight only lasted a few minutes, Halig and Sihtric trading blows until the Dane got the upper hand. He held the blade against Halig's throat, shouting at the other man.

“You will fetch Lord Uhtred or Princess Rhaenerys. Tell Uhtred I have his man. Now!” It didn’t take much for the man to run off, hollering for Uhtred and the Princess as he quickly made his way back to the camp. “With luck, we shall both live,” Sihtric spoke softly to Halig, not moving the blade from his throat.

He watched as a small crowd assembled, Uhtred followed by Hild and Rhaenerys flanked by her knight. Uhtred was the first to reach him, a look of fury on his face and Sihtric got right to speaking.

As Rhaenerys walked up, she overheard a conversation between Sihtric and Lord Uhtred. From the looks of it, Sihtric was trying to bargain for his life. What caught her attention, however, was the fact he was still bound and holding a sword to Halig. To say she was a little impressed would be an understatement, so she watched attentively from the sidelines.

”A life for a life, is it?” Uhtred asked.

”My life for my sword. I wish to serve either you or the Princess. I could’ve killed both of your men, but I wish to serve either you or the Princess, Lord,” Sihtric spoke, maintaining eye contact throughout the exchange.

“You are Kjartan’s man,” Uhtred rolled his eyes, not believing the young man.

Rhaenerys watched as Sihtric shook his head, the next words out of his mouth solidifying her desire to accept his oath for herself. “No. I am Kjartan’s bastard son whelped on a slave girl,” he responded.

Naturally, Abbot Eadred decided to pipe in and make his opinions known, proclaiming Sihtric a heathen and saying he should be killed while Uhtred yelled that no one should move and just let him speak. Rhaenerys looked at the Abbot curiously, wondering what he meant by the use of the word heathen since that meant something different in Westeros. Sihtric did not look like a wildling to her, he looked like a Northerner if anything. The shouting match between Uhtred and Eadred carried on for another moment before she decided to step in before they came to blows.

”Enough!” Rhaenerys commanded, stepping into an authoritative role with ease. Everyone stopped and looked at her, and she turned first to Eadred. “Perhaps you might enlighten me what you mean when you call this man a heathen, Abbot. That word has a very different meaning where I am from,” she spoke, her wrist finding its home on the pommel of Dark Sister, a habit she picked up from watching her father.

The man glared at Uhtred for a moment before facing her, collecting himself before speaking in a measured tone. “Of course, Your Highness. What I mean is this boy a pagan barbarian, he follows the false gods instead of the one true God. His people are uncivilized savages, a plague meant to be cleansed from this land by the hands of the righteous.”

She clenched her jaw, picking up his meaning instantly. She had played nice so far, but for him to classify any outside his own narrow minded views as unworthy of existing had her blood boiling and she was going to put him in his place. “Answer me this, do you think Ser Elwood here is a heathen?” She asked harshly, gesturing to the older man behind her.

”No, Your Highness. He is a good and godly man, unlike some present,” Eadred stated, cutting his eyes towards Uhtred and Sihtric.

”He is a good man, yes, but not a godly one. He follows the Faith of the Seven, a religion which worships multiple gods,” Rhaenerys gripped Dark Sister, willing herself to keep a level tone instead of throttling the fool in front of her. “Do you believe the captain of my household guard, Beren Harclay, my own mother’s cousin and follower of the Old Gods, is a heathen?”

Eadred realized his faux pas too late, his eyes widening as he prepared to back track but the look in her eyes had him answering her in a nervous manner, twisting his hands anxiously. “No, Princess. What I meant was-“

“I myself follow the Gods of Old Valyria, just like my father and grandmother,” she cut him off, her gaze hard as she practically stared him into submission. “Am I a heathen, Abbot?” She snarled, watching as the men behind Eadred shrank back a little from her tone.

”No, Princess,” Eadred answered, looking like a thoroughly chastised boy in that moment as the realization his words had insulted her and her people, thus effectively ruining any chance at an alliance between Cumberland and Westeros.

Rhaenerys took a deep breath before glaring at Eadred once more. “For a man whose faith preaches loving thy neighbor, you certainly have an interesting way of going about it,” she ground out, Eadred grinding his own teeth as he bit his tongue to prevent putting his foot in his mouth any further. She didn’t miss how Uhtred smirked a little as the man stepped back to his place beside Guthred, nor did it escape her notice that the king did not intervene.

He truly is a weak man with no backbone, she thought with a roll of her eyes, turning her head to face Uhtred. “I believe Sihtric has made his intentions clear enough. Either you accept his oath, or I will ask that he be released to me so that I might. I could use a man of his skill and knowledge, since I am clearly uninformed on the differences between this land and mine,” she said with a pointed look at the Abbot, who at least had the decency to look partly ashamed of himself.

For his part, Uhtred looked back to the bound man, his hands resting on his hips as he addressed the young warrior. “Well boy, the choice is yours. Either me or Princess Rhaenerys,” he asked, Sihtric looking between the two of them as he thought over his decision.

When Sihtric initially put this plan into motion, he did not anticipate that he would have the option to choose. Either way, he would be free from Kjartan and have the chance to lead a better life, one that would make his mother proud. He looked at Lord Uhtred, and in another life, he would’ve sworn to him. But in this one, he couldn’t pass up the chance to serve an actual princess.

“I swear my sword is yours, Princess. On Thor’s hammer, I swear,” he said, gripping the pendant he wore and kneeling in the leaf covered ground. He kept his head down, only barely looking up when he saw her boots come into his view.

”Then you have my protection, Sihtric,” she said, pulling a dagger from her side to cut the ropes binding him. Her touch was gentle, and he found himself blushing at the contact.

”Thank you, Princess, thank you. I swear I am your man from this day, until my last,” Sihtric said gratefully, relief flooding his veins when the rope fell from his wrists and onto the ground. He chanced a look at her face, rubbing the reddened marks on his skin from the bindings.

“Indeed you are,” Rhaenerys had a knowing glint in her violet eyes and a wry smile on her lips as she spoke, making Sihtric feel as though there was some deeper meaning behind her words. He stood and watched her turn, speaking to a dark haired man wearing black armor with a sigil bearing three moons, waxing, full and waning, emblazoned on the chest plate. “Captain Beren, Sihtric is with us now. See to it he is armed and armored properly as a man of my House,” she commended, the man nodding and gesturing for Sihtric to follow him.

Sihtric was quick to follow, only to be stopped by Halig when the other man gave him an unreadable stare.

’So, do you need to shit, or not?” Halig asked him, sounding rather pissed off but Sihtric just laughed it off and followed after Captain Beren, eager to prove himself worthy of Rhaenerys and her generosity.

Tagging: @sihtricfedaraaahvicius @whitedarkmoonflower @gemini-mama @zaldritzosrose @alexagirlie

@legitalicat @thenameswinter99 @viking-chaos

[mandy-asimp]

Random confessions

Pairings: Melissa Schemmenti x oc(they/them)

Warnings: kissing! Gary hate(I promise I support him🙏) cursing, I think that’s it?

A/n: this is like doing the fork in the garbage disposal

“Janine, I think you shouldn’t beat around the bush. Yes, neither of you have it in you to confess, but if you let him go then you’ll be upset about it.” The two younger teachers walked in together. Alex advising the friend to not make their mistake.

They were the last two to get to the teacher’s lounge. “You speak like you know how it feels?”

Alex nodded, their curls bouncing in the action. “I am, I liked melissa since my first day, cause anyone in their right mind would, but she has Gary so I just admire from a far and I’m telling you Janine, being envious of someone is not fun.” They casually said. The whole room was quiet.

They kept moving through their routine. Pulling out their lunch, heating it up. “Seriously, don’t make my mistake. Plus, you two are head over heels for each other, it’s just a matter of the moment.” Alex shrugged. Taking their seat across from Melissa at the table. Looking up to meet the eyes of everyone else, they stared confused. “What? I thought it was extremely obvious I like her?”

“No! No it wasn’t!” Melissa was the first to shout. The red head didn’t waste another second before storming out the room.

Alex furrowed their brows, “that was a bit much. I mean seriously, it wasn’t a secret.” They were so calm about it and everyone was stunned.

Barb cleared her throat, “I think we’re all confused, especially because we all thought you would never say it out loud…in front of her.”

They let out a small laugh and went on with their day. Not really putting much attention to the whole lunch thing.

That was until Melissa stomped in at the end of the day. Slamming the door shut. “You got some nerve kid! You don’t get to make me think that you hate me for almost two years just to casually confess you have a little schoolgirl crush on me.”

“Did you really think I hated you?” Alex turned in their chair to face the red head. Smiling just ever so slightly at how the redness on the woman deepened. “I mean if you wanna know what me hating someone is I guess I’d say it’s more like I completely ignore their existence.”

“You have hardly ever said a word to me?” Melissa mentioned. “You said it yourself, I have Gary.”

Alex shrugged again. Turning back to the paper work and letting the conversation end. There wasn’t much to talk about. Melissa had Gary. Alex could only imagine.

“No! You don’t get to shrug and turn away! We’re not done talking,” Melissa grew annoyed. How could someone have the nerve to turn from her?

“There’s not much to say really. I like you but you’re in a relationship. I truly don’t mind it, if he makes you happy then he makes you happy. And I do talk to you, just in a group setting.” It was a plain and simple concept. “Honestly Melissa, I’m just a kid in your eyes, but I’m a kid who’s going to have a crush on you.”

“This is not something that you can be so casual about!” She cried out. “You don’t get to be so casual about this!”

Alex turned. Looking at the woman once more. “Melissa, I don’t know what you’re trying to get out of me here. Do you want me to be flipping out over it? I’ve learned it’s just one of those life events you either follow or let slip away.”

Melissa opened her mouth, but shut it. With a growl and a shake of her fist, she left the school for the day.

She was going to go home, but she needed to let this all out. It’s how she ended up at Barb’s house. A glass of wine in her hand while she paced.

“I mean, now what? I can’t just act like I don’t know because I do! The nerve of some people honestly! That’s the thing with new teachers! They don’t think about what they’re saying no matter who it hurts. They just say whatever. They knew I was with Gary, so why would they say it out loud like it was a simple sentence?!” Melissa thought out.

“Well you could try and forget it? Its not like you two ever really talk one on one?” The friend reminded. Never once really seeing the two interact alone.

Melissa sighed, “that’s the issue though! You know I have always had a thing for mysterious people. And they’re…well mysterious! Nobody knows anything about them except for their pronouns because Jacob…oh my god!” She realized her answer. “Jacob knows Alex.”

“Now Melissa, before you go harassing that poor child, think. You have Gary. Who is someone your age.” Barbara reminded. Yet she knew, her words weren’t going to get through. Once Melissa was set on something, she was going to go for it. “I guess I’m saying is, be careful about this. They’re a young adult and don’t know what they want. They’re an indecisive child compared to us.”

Melissa did take in those words. They were almost young enough to be her child. But the thought of being wanted by someone so young and yet such an old soul. That’s how they got to the lunch table after all.

Barbra had noticed how they would talk about things the two of them knew more than what their age group did talk about. It wasn’t about Taylor Swift and Harry Styles, it was always The Ronettes and Frank Sinatra. Humming songs that the two easily recognized.

The next morning rolled around. The teacher lounge only hosting Melissa for the moment. The soft humming soon disturbed her thoughts.

“Pretty woman,” was whispered. An accent playing on the words. Alex started dancing while getting their juice together. “And you look lovely as can be.” They never noticed Melissa, but once they did. The song suddenly became about her and they sang it like they didn’t care.

Spinning themselves out the room with ease. Leaving Melissa blushing and alone. She need to get it together and fast. This whole mixed feelings was suddenly becoming too much and it was only the first day of it.

“I don’t know why you actin’ all surprised,” Ava chirped as she waltzed in. “I’ve seen their taste in woman, and it is an elite flavor.”

“You knew?!” Melissa almost jumped to strangle. “How did you know?!”

“It was the first random confession they gave me. The second one was that one time they were out with friends and wanted to get over you on Valentine’s Day, so they went to a bar but a really ended up going home sober and crying because some lady who had dyed red hair reminded them too much of you and they realized that you were for real with Gary even tho they were so positive it wouldn’t work and they’d swoop in and get their chance.” Ava rambled. The story making Melissa wonder. Who actually knew and who played surprised?

“Do you know who else knew?” Melissa leaned forward. Hands folding on the table neatly.

Ava thought for a second. “I think it was me, Jacob, then Barbra? No it was definitely me, Barbra, Jacob, then Gregory. Janine was the last one to know. They told us that the day they said it out loud would never happen. That’s why we were all shocked.”

Melissa frowned, but once everyone else started walking in, the conversation was dropped.

Alex’s voice could be heard coming down the hall. “No but what I’m saying, is if you don’t try it then you’re never going to know if you like it. Its like when you took me with you and Gerald onto the cruise in hopes to help me get over Melissa because in your words ‘it’s better to try than to wallow in your self pity.’ So, I’m saying, you and Gerald should try a different cruise line. Just for one trip!”

The room once again looked at them. “Are you serious right now?” Melissa rubbed her temples.

Alex gave a classic shrug. “I seriously don’t know how you thought I was mysterious. I mean, I walk in here everyday giving some advice and relating it to some confession.”

Melissa shot a look to Barb. Her own friend talked about her issue to the issue? It was like a feeling of betrayal but at the same time she was kinda ok with it(this one time).

“Yeah, don’t you remember last week when I was having issues about getting a pet or not? Alex had a really odd confession. And thinking about it, a lot of them were somehow connected to you?” Jacob sipped his drink.

“Mine was about my dads business and Alex connected it back to you.” Gregory piped in.

Melissa looked around the room. Everyone talking lightly about some random confession. “Are you all telling me, you all knew? And yet never said a single thing?”

“I mean why would they? It’s my crush?” Alex laughed with their words. “I don’t know, don’t think about it too hard. It never leads to anything good. Like this one time I overthought just you looking at me and then I ended up at home crying because I couldn’t tell if you meant it with anything or if it was because I was staring at you with absolutely no thought in my head. Because usually that’s how it feels being near you. Like I just never think about what I say. Its kinda like now how im just rambling because I’m getting nervous just talking to you. So its actually my cue to leave this room before I keep going and embarrass myself!”

Alex quickly walked out the room. Hiding away in their room for the rest of the day not really believing the conversation that was had that morning. But even, when trying to avoid everyone at lunch, Melissa came in.

“Look, I don’t know what game you’re playing, but it ends now.” She spoke through gritted teeth as she locked the door and drew the blinds. “It’s not fair ya know!”

“I know its not.”

“So then why do you keep saying things that you don’t mean? Telling these stories to everyone if you know its not fair?” Melissa was leaning against the door.

“I dunno. I guess apart of me didn’t keep it a secret because I hoped you would find out. That once you knew, the unrealistic fantasies of you leaving Gary to be with me would come true.”

“Kid this is reality. Your fantasies are nothing more than that. You can’t just go lying just because.” Melissa frowned.

Alex finally turned to face her. “I’m not lying. I’ve liked you since the first day I started. Barbra told that you were going through stuff when I accidentally told her and she told me to not. I couldn’t help myself though.” There was sincerity in each word. Alex meant the words with everything they had.

Melissa stared. Her mind racing. What was she getting into? “Alex…”

“It’s whatever if you want it to be. I mean, you have someone. So we can just make it a joke if it makes you feel better? I’m ok with joking about it. I do it a lot whenever I have a random confession. Which really aren’t random. I just like talking about you to people. Even my mom knows about you. She asks me everyday on our phone call about you and I tell her about the entire day.” Alex rambled again. The nervousness really shinning through this time.

Melissa stepped off the door. Moving to sit on the edge of the desk. She let out a sigh. “Don’t you want someone your age? Someone who’s just as indecisive as you?”

Alex frowned. They knew that with confessing would come rejection, but they didn’t think it was gonna be this painful with all the preparation. “I’m not some indecisive child you paint me to be.” They whispered. Eyes glued to their computer screen now.

There was a silence. A loud….long……silence……..

“I don’t appreciate this Alex.”

“I know, and I’m sorry I’ve said it out loud.”

Melissa gave one last look before leaving the room. What was she to do now? Did she like Alex back? Was it a possibility? Absolutely. Who wouldn’t love the calmness of their personality. People specifically went to Alex with problems knowing they’d solve them without knowing.

Yet, a week without anyone’s problems being solved lead to chaos. Alex bad randomly disappeared for a week and nobody knew what to really do.

The Wednesday they came back, they were the first one at school. A box full of at least everyone’s favorite donut. All spread out accordingly.

“Where the hell were you for an emergency week call off?” Ava was the first one to arrive. Finding her donut front and center. “For me?! You shouldn’t have!”

“I had just a family thing. It was really last minute.” There was something off. Ava could see it. “I’ll be back, I left my phone in my classroom.”

They were gone and hidden before anyone could see them. But once they pranced back into the room everyone cheered. “I know! I know!”

“Where have you been?” Jacob was the first to raise the question. “Everyone was looking for you! Janine even sent the police to your house.”

Alex shrugged. “It was a family thing. They’re trying to do a bunch of stuff before my parents move to Australia. They waited till they made sure all their kids were set for adult life before going back home.”

Ava took the seat next to them. Turning them to face her. “You’re from Australia?!”

“Only until I was like 17? I try to hide my accent but it really shows when I’m alone. So I like to try to blend in. It also shows when I try to pronounce certain things.” They explained, biting into their donut. “But one day when we go out I’ll let it shine. Really draw in the woman.”

“Right go out so you can forget your crush on Melissa.” Ava laughed before leaving. Knowing she was right too.

Alex glanced at the woman. Already seeing her staring back. “She’s right ya know. That’s probably the only reason I go out at this point.” They beamed. Showing off that charming smile.

“For someone who was gone for a week, you sure came back with a sense of wanting to forget.” Melissa shot back. Catching Alex off guard for only a brief second.

“For someone who’s a Philly 11, you sure act like a Chicago 9.” Alex attempted to insult her, but it was damn impossible.

Melissa smirked, “for someone who’s a teacher, you sure could use a lesson in comebacks.” She had Alex pinned. Or so she thought.

“So then teach me Mel.” They stood. A shit eating grin plastered to their face while they left. Knowing Melissa was hot on their trail.

It was only a second after Alex got into their room, that the door slammed shut behind them.

“You can’t keep doing this kid! You need to learn to snap out of this crush!” Melissa was fuming. She couldn’t handle this game forever.

Alex gave her a look. A devilish smirk, and their confidence grew almost instantly. They slowly stalked closer to the 2nd grade teacher. Walking her right against the door.

Melissa began to feel small. Along withOther things. Things Gary hasn’t ever made her feel. Alex met her eyes. An innocence glossed over them. “So then teach me to snap out of it.”

The opening to kiss was right there, but Alex was respectful. They backed off, returning to the desk and working on a few papers for the day.

Melissa was frozen against the wood. Was she dreaming? She couldn’t be! She could feel the warmth of their breathe brush her cheeks. She blinked a few times. Realizing what she was in here for.

“That! You can’t….do that!” Melissa stuttered out. She let out a heavy sigh. “I can’t focus when you do things like that.”

Alex let a smile take over their face. “Well honey, if things between you and Gary don’t work, just know I’ll be waiting to treat you the right way.” They picked up their head. Flashing a soft smirk, watching intently as Melissa struggled to get out of the room. “You know where I’ll be!”

The day ended with Melissa dodging Alex entirely.

She honestly felt tied. Yes, she liked Gary. She also has had something for Alex. Yet, she still was with Gary. The choice was eating her alive. But she knew what her answer was. Her mind began to race at the sight of her issue. A intense migraine coming on.

“Alex, now really isn’t the time.” Her head fell into her hands. Blocking out all light from hitting her eyes.

Alex hummed. “Well, then I’ll be quick. This is my number. Whenever you need someone who isn’t Barb to talk to.” They delicately placed down the pink sticky note. “Have a good night, Melissa.” They spun on their heel, going home for the day.

Melissa sighed. Feeling completely helpless in the moment. Its honestly how she felt for the next few days.

With the jokes that were made and the constant staring, Melissa was trapped in her own discomfort and silence. The discomfort being more so because Alex was belittling their feelings just for her and being so respectful about Gary.

That was until Thursday.

“I mean, if you and Zach want to go out I can watch your niece for the night. You know she loves me more than both of you combined,” Alex offered to Jacob. “Seriously, I don’t have any plans or paper work.”

The two were having a peaceful conversation till Melissa walked in. And Alex was going to move over to her, but they decided to just keep in the conversation.

“You’d really do that so we could go celebrate?” Jacob was touched. The only other person that would’ve offered was Janine, and last time was a disaster. “Can you be there by 6?”

“I’ll do you one better, I’ll be there by 5.” Alex patted his hand. Getting ready to leave the teachers lounge for the rest of the hour.

Bumping into the man they envied the most. Backing up for a second to let him in, but was met with a push instead.

Alex stumbled back a bit. Lucky enough to catch their balance before anything. “The hell?” They furrowed their brows. Not really showing their anger and distaste for the man.

“You got some nerve kid! Thinking Melissa would ever leave over your silly confession!” His voice was loud. “She doesn’t want you! Get it through your head!”

Alex blinked. Trying to figure if this was really happening. It was. “No. You know who has nerve? You. For coming in here and disrespecting me when I have done absolutely nothing. I’ve openly flirted with her a total of three times. For two years she thought I hated her. So you should really watch yourself before things get ugly Gary. Because I’m not an ugly person. I think you should treat her with the most respect you could possibly think of in that tiny pea brain you have. Because one day Gary, you’re gonna fuck up. And she’ll realize she’s too good for you and gave you this ego. And to come in here and embarrass her because of your own insecurities! Real wise of you.” Their accent came through. The anger being so dominant, hiding it wasn’t worth it.

“And what? She’ll come to you? You’re basically a child. She’ll never come to you no matter how low life gets.” He folded his arms. Standing tall and proud of his words.

The curly haired teacher gave a dry laugh. “I may be a child, but I’m more of a man than you will ever be. And even if she comes to me at her lowest, I’ll sure as hell bring her to her highest. Show her everything that makes her so desirable. If that’s how I get my chance, then I will take it and charish her every single day of my damn life. So really, watch yourself.” Alex walked away.

The room was silent as they stared at the man. Nobody dared to move at this point.

Melissa slowly rose from her chair. “Gary.” Her voice was venomous. “We’re through.” She shouldered past him. Fury written all over her body.

A second went by. “Y’all heard that accent right? Shit was so sexy, you got your ass handed to you!” Ava cackled as she went to her office.

Meanwhile, Alex was hunched over their desk. Staring straight down with their own thoughts blocking out the world.

How could one man be so stupid but have the most amazing woman? It wasn’t fair. Alex would do anything to understand it.

“Alex…” Melissa’s voice was the only thing to pull them out of their thoughts.

With a sharp intake, Alex looked up. “I’m sorry for embarrassing you like that.” They were quick to say. “It was completely unprofessional and I should’ve just stayed in my place, but the way he talked….it just….I’m sorry.”

Melissa stood stunned. They were apologizing for something they didn’t do. “Alex, hun. You don’t have to be sorry. If anything…thank you.”

The curls shook. Blocking out the remains of tears. “I just…he was just the tiniest bit right. No matter what, you’ll never see me as more than a kid. And as much as I’ve tried to accept it, it still hurts to hear.” They confessed. Confiding in the woman for just this one moment. Almost like flipping a switch, they flashed a smile. “But don’t worry about me. I’ll get over it in a few hours.”

Melissa let a frown take over. “Stop doing that.”

“Doing what?”

“Belittling your feelings because you think you’re not good enough. As someone who isn’t…amazing with emotions, you’re still allowed to have them. And it doesn’t do you any good by making them so small just because you think it’s what we all want.” Melissa cautiously got closer.

They let their smile fall. “If I cant be with you, then you have to stop chasing after me just to give me a false hope. You’re not playing fair…just like me.”

She didn’t know what to say anymore. Instead she placed her hand atop of theirs. Gaining their eyes. “I know I’m not. But in all honesty it’s hard to not want to chase after you. For two years I tried to get to know you, and anytime you would run or give me some shit answer. I truly thought you hated me. But now? I just don’t know what to do.”

There was a glint of hope in Alex’s brown eyes. Could this be it? “Melissa?” The whispered. Noticing how she inches closer and closer. “But…Gary?”

“He’s not important anymore,” she hummed. She left enough space for them to back up. Not knowing if they were truly ready.

Yet, Alex was more than ready. In a quick manner they grabbed the back of her neck and crashed their lips together. Humming into the feeling and melting instantly.

They couldn’t fully process it even once they pulled back. Alex just kissed their crush. They felt high off the feeling. Trying to hold onto it forever.

Their fingers gently touched their lips. Grinning ear to ear.

Melissa raised an eyebrow at them. A smirk taking over her lips. “It was that good?” She teased.

“You wouldn’t believe me if I tried to describe how good.” Alex couldn’t stop smiling. Just enjoying the moment. “Can I…take you out? Like on a date? Friday night?”

“Where we going?” Melissa folded her arms. Suddenly putting Alex in the spotlight. “Somewhere fancy? Or somewhere cute?”

“Well I know how much you like to cook, and I don’t like going out out. So what about, we cook together? Then that’s our dinner? We could go buy everything together and then go back to either mine or yours, which ever you prefer, and just see where the night goes?”

She let out a soft hum. “I’ll see you Friday night then.” She didn’t say anything else, just casually walked away. Hearing a ‘hell yeah’ being shouted behind the door.

The next day went by slower than usual. Teasing Alex with every minute. Yet the moment the last kid was gone, so we’re they.

Racing home to get ready. Not even bothering to bring in their bags. They just found themselves in their closet.

Failing to even think of an outfit. That’s where Ava came in tho.

“I knew you’d be in here struggling!” She walked in. “Move let me see!”

“How….did you break in?” Alex looked at the woman. “Ok but besides that, do I wear something like sexy or cute?”

“You’re going to hers for making dinner, right? So wear something she’ll have a hard time keeping her hands off of. Cause I’m in beta that y’all definitely getting freaky.” Ava was shifting through their clothes. Gasping when she pulled out a black dress.

It had no back and slits up the sides. A lace trim around the top and a floral design down the front.

“Ava that’s basically lingerie.” They shook their head. “I’m not wearing….welll?”

“It’s not too less and you can through a cardigan over it. Then when you cook take it off and act like you’re not being scandalous. Plain and simple. Why do you have so much lingerie in here anyways?” Ava looked through the expensive sets.

Alex shrugged. “I like feeling fancy. Sometimes I put on a set and dance around the apartment. Sometimes I do it just cause I know I’ll look sexy.” They grabbed the dress and found the bathroom to change.

Coming back and looking better in it than Ava expected. “Now hold on. You can’t be going around lookin sexier than me.” She shook her head.

“I literally would get fired if I wore anything in that closet to school. My school clothes are in the dressers. I don’t even go in my closet for when we go out,” Alex mentioned. Looking at all angles in the mirror. “Are we sure this is the right approach? Cause I have these jeans!”

“No. You look hot, with some of those big socks you usually have and your white shoes? You’re bound to take those shoes off. And let your hair down. Then you’re basically ready. Melissa Schemmenti knows what she want so don’t keep her waiting.” Ava left quickly. Not really giving much more help to the friend.

But Ava knew what she was doing when it was with her friends and what not. She wouldn’t steer anyone wrong. So they had nothing to worry about, right?

That’s what Alex truly thought until getting to the address. The house was stunning just from the outside. Nothing compared to their tiny apartment. One that wouldn’t even hold a cat.

Alex took a few deep breaths while getting out the car. Grabbing their cardigan they left in there earlier and struggling to get it on.

Eventually they stood before the door. It was easy now to turn around and leave. Disappear from the state. Leave no trace of existence. Then the doorbell rang. Once. Then twice. Then on three, the door was opened and there she stood.

The two dressed completely different. It honestly embarrassed Alex for dressing up a bit. Especially when Melissa looked so good in the jeans and green top. The blue button up pulling out her eyes even more. Not as much as the red shirt and leather jacket she wore the other day. But maybe that’s because Alex could always focus on those eyes.

They flushed when they realized they were just standing there. “Right! Sorry! You look amazing! Like more than usual because you honestly always look amazing.”

She showed no reaction but a smirk. Seeing how her presence alone made Alex stutter. “Would you like to come in?” She stepped aside. Seeing the hesitation in the twenty something year old. Realizing she never really knew how old Alex was.

“Your home is really beautiful from the outside.” They complimented while keeping their eyes away from the pictures.

The red head, who looked too good in a ponytail, passes with a hum. “I already went to get things, which honestly wasn’t a lot. Mostly cause I had everything here. But the good places close early so I figured you wouldn’t mind?”

Alex shook their head, “I trust you know where the good ingredients lay. So what are we making?”

Melissa looked over her shoulder. A devious look in her eyes at the first answer she thought of. And Alex wasn’t oblivious to the look. “A small lasagna. Its a family recipe. You might want to loose the cardigan, it can get messy.”

With a nod, they removed the piece. Draping it on the back of the chair furthest from them. Spinning around and grinning at how Melissa was looking at them.

Her eyes taking in everything. From the smooth skin that was revealed and how chocolatey it was. She realized they were beyond what she imagined.

It almost made her sick how she began to feel so nervous. With the cardigan on, her mind didn’t wonder as much. Now she couldn’t keep her mind in one place.

“Mel?” Alex called to her. Letting the intense blush be ignored.

Melissa was still staring. Snapping out of it after a second had passed. “Right! Ok, so I prefer making my own noodles. Unless I’m in a rush, I suck it up, but we’re not so.”

The night went smoothly. The lasagna was made, but not with out subtle touches.

The one moment that lingered in Alex’s head was when they were mixing the cheese’s. Melissa had come up behind them, standing behind them. Her front just slightly pressed against their back.

“You’re mixing wrong,” she had pointed out. Her voice was low and close to their ear.

Slowly, her hands slid over. Leading Alex through the movement. It was a careful gesture. Truly anyone would’ve thought nothing more. But Melissa knew about the crush and how nervous she makes Alex already.

Now they sat on the couch with glasses of wine. From the second bottle that is.

Alex’s phone lit up with a text. It was Ava, but they mainly looked at the time. “I should get going,” they hummed.

Their dazed eyes taking in Melissa. Without noticing their hand reached out to touch her cheek. “You’re so pretty.” They lazily smiled. Feeling how warm the woman suddenly became.

“And you’re tipsy, dare say drunk.” Melissa returned, breaking from the contact. “You should stay the night, it’d be safer.”

Alex shook their head. “If I don’t get home my child will be worried. And I’m just tipsy. I’m not a lightweight like Janine. Who actually almost never drinks.”

“Your child? How old are you even?” Melissa laughed lightly at the claim.

“35, 36 in a few weeks.” Alex shrugged. Pulling on their cardigan. “And he is a very clingy child. Well for a cat, he’s clingy. Its what I get for babying him.”

Melissa stood in the kitchen. Hands on the island and a certain look. “There’s no way you’re 35.”

“1987. Im the oldest child, thats why I’m the only one with an accent besides my parents.” Alex shurgged. “What? You think I was like 23?”

“Yes!” Melissa threw her hands up. “How come you just started at Abbott?” Alex let another shrug go. “Can you stop shrugging?”

“Sorry, I started because I transferred from a different school. What? Is 35 too old for you, Ms. Schemmenti?” Alex teased. Stalking closer and closer.

“No! Its just nobody knew much about you. I mean last week you disappeared and then tell us you’re from Australia. And then soon after you let your accent shine when yelling at Gary.” Melissa flushed. Crimson invading her face.

They kept getting closer. Letting their cardigan slip off their shoulders and onto the floor. A new look in their eyes. One that was about to pull more from the red head.

“I mean, the only one who knew anything was Jacob. And then when you let your accent show, dare say it did things that I’ve never felt. You have a lot of tricks up your sleeves.” She just shook her head. Trying to get it together in her head.

There was silence. Alex was right next to her now. “Do I make you nervous, Schemmenti?” They smirked. Holding the upper hand here.

Melissa stared at them. Eyes fluttering just a bit. “No! Not at all!” She shot down. Being extremely unconvincing.

Alex hummed while backing away. Completely ignoring the cardigan. They collected their bag and got ready to leave.

Not noticing how Melissa got to the door before them. Alex looked up, jumping a bit at how she was there. So close. Flipping the tables.

Melissa was in front of them. The look in her eyes making Alex incredibly nervous. Especially when she kept walking closer, until Alex was against the door.

“You are nothing short of the greatest tease.” She whispered. Her voice dangerously low. “And I failed to tell you how sexy you looked tonight.”

“Melissa…” Alex mumbled. Eyes dropping to her lips.

There were no other words, just a steering kiss. One that made Alex melt in the others hands. It only increased the longer they were there.

Melissa made her way to Alex’s neck. Finding the pulse points in mere seconds. Sucking to with the purpose to show everyone. Earning a quiet, airy moan.

“Mel,” they were cut off by their own gasp. Hands grabbed at anything possible. The dress leaving nothing in between the skin to skin.

“Already begging for me?” Melissa smiled against their neck. But she pulled away. “Let’s not rush this though?” Alex frowned. “I promise, hun. But if we rush it, it might get ruined in between. Next weekend though. Its my turn to plan our date.”

“This is gonna be a weekly thing?” Alex lit up instantly. Melissa nodded getting another kiss in return. “I’ll see you Monday.”

“Bright and early,” Melissa smiled. Watching as they left her home giggling.

When she turned around, she saw the cardigan on the floor. Smirking at who it belonged to.

“Until next week,” she whispered to herself.

[shiny-jr]

Hi! I just want to say that I've read all of your takes on how the overblot crew don't get held accountable for what they've done and I am so happy to find another person that agrees with me.

Listen, I understand that we're dealing with incredibly traumatised teenagers who were pushed into it and overblotting was what ultimately lead them towards their healing but put aside the damage that they did during their overblot and think about how awfully they treated yuu beforehand.

Azul: took away their home and the only comfort family they had in twst (the ghosts), and sent the tweels to attack and harrass them during their attempts to get back their home and free their friends from servitude

Jamil: Kidnapped them, locked them up in a room against their will, again took away their home, isolated them from their friends/adeuce and prevented them from contacting anyone, hypnotised them and manipulated them, forced them to participate in long marches in the desert and literally turned a blind eye during their clear suffering

Vil: (he is literally my least favourite character - and yes, I do understand that he has just as much trauma and issues as the others due to his past and the pressure he puts on himself to be perfect - but I just don't like him) he was downright cruel and needlessly awful to not only Yuu but everyone else. He not only was horrid to poor Epel but he was dismissive and uncaring to the point of upsetting Deuce and making him run off so that no one would see him in that state. And that was before he tried to murder an innocent teenager in cold blood pre-overblot.

Yuu has gone through so much because of them and not once do they ever actually acknowledge the damage they've done to them. No one ever thinks: hey, maybe we should check up on that traumatised child that we've most definitely emotionally scarred and try to make amends instead of brushing their feelings under the rug.

You know why I love Ace so much? He actually calls people out for what they've done. He rightfully admonishes Trey for being a bystander during Riddle's reign of terror whilst Heartslabyul was suffering, he rightfully tells Riddle that crying won't erase the way he treated them before he overblotted (I was shocked that he had the guts to say that but I agreed with him - I stan a real one), he punches Riddle when he maliciously insults Yuu for no reason (that was the moment I fell for him. Yes I have a 5% hunch he did that also because he just wanted to punch him but the fact that it was Yuu's feelings getting hurt that made him actually lose it after everything else Riddle did to him is just everything to me), and he rightfully gets mad at Malleus when his prank made him think that his friends were dead.

I actually have a Yuu/OC that's so traumatised by the overblots that the only people they fully trust are Adeuce and Grim. They don't know if anyone that's nice to them are actually manipulative or will just use them in the future so they've developed serious trust issues and have PTSD from the actions of the overblots that they don't even look at them or greet them in the hallways. This is a Yuu that will forgive and never forget. It sounds petty and vindictive but I want them to suffer in their guilt whilst Yuu gets the support and help from Adeuce that they need.

Okay, I held off on responding to this because goddamn is it a long ask. Hold on, I gotta put this under the cut because it's too much, and my responding just makes it longer. Also, you read all the takes? That's impressive, considering I don't remember half of what I said. Spoilers for all overblots, including from the diasomnia chapter.

I'm just gonna summarize this in one simple statement. I know people aren't gonna agree, but here it is. The overblotted students deserved more punishments. As you said, yes, they're traumatized, but they were still conscious of their decisions before they overblotted. And they all did some questionable stuff before overblotting.

You literally said everything I was going to say. None of them are innocent. Even if they didn't overblot, their actions before the disaster were bad.

Idk, I feel like Yuu should be a little more acknowledged sometimes. I mean, yeah, ultimately, the characters do get close to Yuu and help them out. (1) Riddle helping Yuu investigate against Leona, (2) Leona helping Yuu get rid of Azul's contracts to free everyone, (3) Azul stepping in to help Yuu while they were stuck with Jamil, (4) Jamil getting them out of that dangerous overblot situation with Vil, (5) Vil helping fight against Idia and giving Yuu and co. a kiss, etc. But half of these felt like they had ulterior motives when they did this, and yeah, they treat Yuu differently, but we don't see that too much.

Ace is like one of the only real ones. The realest. Yeah, he was a massive jerk in the beginning, but that character development? In the beginning of the prologe, he was just being rude for no reason. But then, by the end of the prologe, he's actually begrudgingly friends with Yuu, and then towards the end of chapter one, as you said, he defends Yuu after Riddle made that unnecessary comment. Find yourself a bro like Ace (also because, as mentioned in other posts, he did not stand for Malleus' and Lilia's bs prank).

Honestly, Yuu should be super messed up mentally and emotionally by now. Probably even physically. Because of all the stuff they've gone through.

[celandeline]

Summer of Like // Farleigh Start x OC (17)

I am so incredibly glad that Elspeth put my seat next to Venetia, otherwise I would be completely lost at this dinner. The people I know are vastly outnumbered by the people I don’t, and I feel for Felix, who looks so bored stranded between two men (who I can assume are both named Henry). 

“And what’s your name?” The man to my right is already red in the face, and we’re only on the second course of the meal. 

“Evelyn.” I say, shifting slightly in my seat to face him. 

“Henry.” He says, extending his hand to shake. His palms are sweaty, and I try not to cringe at the way he leaves a film on my hand. 

“I figured.” I say, wiping my palm on the skirt of my dress. 

He laughs, even though I didn’t really mean it to be all that funny - but drunk people make the best crowd. “I’ve not seen you about before.” He says. “Or maybe I have -” He chuckles. “Parties here do tend to get rather crowded.”

“This is my first time.” I say. “Venetia brought me home for the summer.”

His eyebrows quirk up. “How are you liking it?”

“It’s great.” I say, turning to my plate to spoon a bite of dinner into my mouth. “The house is beautiful.”

“Oh, yes.” He says. “I remember the first time I saw this house - of course, I was very young, then - but I still remember that grandeur feeling. And the people - James’s mother and father were such lovely people.”

“I’m sure.” I say, trading my spoon for my wine glass. It’s white wine tonight, and it goes down easier than the red. 

He stops himself to drain his own wineglass. “Really such lovely people, the Cattons.”

“Mm.” My eyes drift along the table until they reach the end, where Elspeth and Farleigh are sat around a corner. Even though Elspeth is talking to him, Farleigh’s eyes are on me as he takes a long draught from his glass. He tilts his head as he sets his cup down, and smirks. 

“Truly, it’s a sort of fantasy, being here…”

Mostly prattling to himself at this point, I turn away from Henry and back towards Venetia. Her back is to me though, talking to Oliver. 

“No thanks.” Venetia says, sighing. “It’s just so disappointing. You're just another one of his toys.”

“You're upset.” Oliver doesn’t sound sympathetic at all.

“No! Don't worry! I'm used to it, honestly.” She says it so flippantly my heart breaks a little.  “He never liked sharing his toys. Even the ones he doesn’t want to play with anymore.” She turns away from him, to face me with a sad sort of smile. 

“Venetia…” Oliver hisses. “Venetia…”

She pays him no mind. “Hi Evie.”

I smile. “Hi baby.”

She drops her voice, and picks up her wineglass. “He’s such a bore, my god.” She flicks her hair over her shoulder towards Oliver. “As soon as Felix says no, that’s it. Done.” She glances across the table. “Felix hasn’t spoken to me since yesterday morning.”

“He’ll come around.” I say. “You’re his sister.”

“I know.” She sighs. “Still - there goes my summer entertainment.”

I roll my eyes. I don’t believe for a second that she’s going to stop batting her eyelashes at him. She’ll take a break, sure, but she couldn’t even come up with a word to describe the way he gave her head - she’s going to at least try again. 

“What about you?” She says. “What about last night?”

“What about last night?” I say. 

“Farleigh was on your bed.”

“To gossip.” I say. 

“To gossip,” She mocks, rolling her eyes. “Without me? Alone, in your room, when you’d just gotten out of the shower? Gossip.” 

“Yes, gossip.” I say. “You know about his weird hate-boner for Oliver.”

“I know about his boner-boner for you.” Venetia says. Her eyes skip away from mine, past me, to where Farleigh is sitting. 

“We almost kissed.” I say, hushed. “I think. I don’t know.”

She bites her lip as she grins. “Go on.” Sure, Oliver might be too scared to keep their summer romance going, but that doesn’t mean she can’t doubly invest herself in mine to keep herself entertained. 

“We almost kissed that night on the roof, too, I think.” I say. “I don’t know, he’s not… most guys would just do it, you know? He keeps just waiting.” 

“And you haven’t kissed him because?” She asks.

“I’m kind of enjoying the tension.” I admit, a little sheepishly. 

“Me too.” She says, grinning. “It’s like my own soap opera happening in my house, starring people that I already know and love. I’m so glad that I brought you home, Evie, really.”

“So glad that I could make your summer more interesting.” I say, truthfully. 

“You’ll have to tell me if he’s a good kisser, when you do end up snogging.” She says. “I’ve always wanted to know who’s the best kisser out of the three of us - everyone says Felix is quite bad, and I think I’m alright, but I don’t know anyone that’s kissed Farleigh to check.”

“If we end up snogging.” I say, mocking her accent. 

“Oh, shove off, New Yawk.” She grins. “And if you don’t at least kiss him, I’ll be furious.”

“Well, if you’ll be furious.” I say, taking another draught of my wine. 

“Please,” She snorts. “I know you want to.”

“But-”

“And I already know what you’re going to say, ‘what if we kiss and then it’s boring’ - it’s Farleigh. You can say many things about Farleigh, but you can’t say he’s boring.” She gives me a pointed look. 

I grin. “You know me so well.”

She smiles back at me. “I do, don’t I?”

I glance back to the end of the table where Farleigh sits. He’s leaned over towards Elspeth, saying something that I can’t make out, but like he can sense my gaze shifting, his eyes meet mine, and he smiles. I return his grin, and take another sip of wine, licking the excess off my lips. 

&lt; previous part | next part >

[theysaidhush]

⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒⭒

Chapter 1: Animal Farm

Pairing: Stray Kids x 9th member!OFC

Warnings:

I'll say this only once, this is the only warning you'll get. Future chapters will contain lot of smut (eventually) angst and fluff. Heavy topics will be discussed (idol life y'know) but I don't wanna spoil it. This story isn't for sensitive person? I don't know how to put it. Just don't read if you think you'll feel uncomfortable!

This is a x OC but will be tagged as a x Reader. I find it difficult to write properly about a character while worrying about making it inclusive and fitting my story. I don't really care about her name or physical apparence though so if you have any suggestion I'm up for it.

No pressure chill under the trees. Updates will not be regular as this story is solely for my entertainment and whenever I feel like writing it. Means that I'll keep on posting even if I don't have any feedbacks but also means that chapter lengths will vary to very short to more words. You can have many chapters the same day, depends on my life, but I don't really like short chapter so ill do my best.

"I am not being a pain in the ass."

"Yes you are."

"You kinda are."

Minho sent a chilling glance to the boy who was curled up next to him on the living room's couch. It was enough for Jisung to shudder. But the topic was serious, he wasn't about to change his opinion just because his hyung was giving him that look.

"No seriously, you really are."

"Okay."

Minho smiled and kept on doing what he was doing on his phone, ignoring everyone's stare - Jisung's stare particularly. The younger boy was looking intently at him, he was waiting for something, something he was sure his hyung would do. And he did. Like three minutes after. He blew through his nose, still looking at his screen.

"Ah! I knew it!"

"I really don't understand what's the problem. Has she done anything to upset you? We can talk it out like adults."

The couple on the couch looked up from each other and Minho stared at Chan intently yet silently. The leader couldn't really tell what was on the dancer's mind, and it was upsetting him to no extent. Any other day he would have brushed it off as Minho being Minho. The latter was a great friend, he almost considered him his brother, despite not knowing on the tip of his fingers the boy's small quirks and habits. It was a Jisung thing. But now, more than never, he wished he could know him a bit more, he wished for the other boy to let him in.

"I don't want to talk it out with you."

"Minho..."

Jisung's hush whispers was not a warning, yet, it felt like one. He was not scolding his Hyung, he was just trying to appease the tension. Chan's face was contorted in what people would consider anger, but Jisung knew better. He was frustrated.

"This is about the whole group, not just me. I didn’t come to you as a friend, Minho, I'm here as a leader."

And it might have not been the right thing to say. Because Minho frowned, and retreated into silence.

"What a mess." was Jisung's thoughts, his eyes drifting toward his leader’s, whose head was turned toward a silhouette standing in the hallway.

"No. You can't do this to us."

"You don't have a choice."

"We do! It's my group, our group, we've worked so hard to reach our goals and create the music that will fit us!"

Chan did not know what was more upsetting at the moment; the fact that he was having this conversation while he was sleep deprived - he would blame himself for that latter, saying that it was the reason he couldn't plead their case better - or the fact that he was even having this conversation.

"They've let you do your things, you know that Chan."

"No, they gave up on us, so we had to fight our way to the top! That's what happened."

The word 'top' was a far too big word for Chan, but one he had to use nonetheless to prove his case. They were enough. They were just fine.

"They..." his manager sighed and pinched his nose. The situation was getting out of hands and even he could not do a thing about it. But at the the end of the day, his job was on the line, and he had a family to feed. "They threatened to disband the group if you don't agree to the term."

"Just fine by then! We'll go elsewhere and keep on doing music together."

"You don't understand Chan, think it through! This is not a GOT7 type of situation, they'll take Stray Kids' name, your music, your brand and all that you've accomplished by yourself, and if you do try to prosecute them you'll lose. I've read the contracts, everyone's contract. You can't refuse."

"I can't - " Chan laughed and sat on his chair, running his hands on his face. "This is disgusting and despicable."

"I know, Chan, I'm sorry."

"They just want to make publicity, it'll bury us."

"I know..."

It was a one in a life time opportunity, the young woman really and truly understood that. She was considered too old to even sit in that room, she was told countless times. Yet, it did not change the fact that she was sitting in that room. The room where all important decisions were made.

She felt uncomfortable, growing uneasy, fighting the urge to scratch her skin off - one bad old habit. Her choices, her decisions; all of those were flashing in her mind like a broken tape, image and pictures of the times she spent practicing to be here - not that much, if you ask her.

Those people stare - those important people's stare was making her fidget in her sit, avoid eye contact. Were they testing her? Waiting for a particular reaction, the one which could get her out of here in a matter of seconds? The room was feeling too warm, she will sweat buckets if she doesn't go out. Right now.

"There you go. Miss?"

They did not even knew her name. It was a bit disappointing, but then again, she was just another someone wandering between those halls, wasn't she?

"Athéna."

"A- Axina..?"

"More like, Ah-thé-nah." she corrected their pronunciation with a soft voice, continuing, "You can google it."

But their glare was enough for her to shut her mouth and look at the ceiling. It was a fool idea to correct them, they were older, knew much more things than her. It was a little unnerving, this whole elder situation was a lot to get accustomed to in South Korea.

"Axina. Have you read the terms and condition of the contract?"

"I have."

"Any reclamation?"

She wanted to laugh at their face, but she couldn't. She did not had it in her to do that. So she nodded, pretending to be genuinely interested by their answer, even if she quite knew what they would say.

"Regarding the whole part of you managing my...image. I'd like to know if it concerns my hair too?"

"Yes, obviously. And your weight too."

Freezing cold in her bones. Was it because the window was opened? Or was it their stares? It was chilling nonetheless. It was sending her back into a period of her life where she had looked at her reflection days and nights to get a glimpse of her ribs and be satisfied with the view.

"Oh."

"You'll have to work on your Korean too, your pronunciation isn't that good."

"What are you?" another one asked, shifting through the page of the contract she had signed.

What she was. Not who. Not her nationality. But what.

"I'm French, mister."

"Great, it'll help with publicity oversea. Are you fluent in English?"

Why was she having this discussion with them?Wasn't she supposed to talk to the manager and the team helping Stray Kids? Why was she sitting in front of JYP's shareholder.

"I'm almost fluent. I've learned while traveling."

"What a shame. If she was prettier we could have scored partnerships with French luxury brands such as Dior or Channel."

"She'll be perfect for the role that will be given to her."

"I guess so."

"We're done with you."

Was it an animal farm? She never felt that disturbed by a conversation in her whole life. She shuddered, getting up from her sit as she grabbed the hem of her sweatshirt to pull on the lose strands. She couldn't help herself but rock back and forth on her feet - another bad habit of her that some even called weird.

"And stop doing that it's weird."

Chapter 2

[wildernessuntothemselves]

You Are My Queen Now | Part 12

Word Count: 14k

Genre: Smut, angst, fluff

Summary: Growing up as a child of a minor lord, you had it instilled in you since a young age that you needed to find yourself a rich and affluent husband that would not only provide a comfortable life for you, but would also help further your family’s position in the court. So it was of the utmost importance that you remain a virgin in order to land such a coveted husband.

The problem lies when the man you secretly love, Prince Beomgyu, suddenly and unabashedly propositions you.

Warnings: fingering, cunnilingus, overstimulation, missionary degradation, sub!gyu, dom!gyu, sub!oc, dom!oc, breeding kink, inaccurate portrayal of an old wedding, oc has a mini panic attack, knife and blood play, self harm and harming others, mentions of past rape, slapping, smothering gyu with your pussy lmao, pregnancy, extremely unhealthy relationship dynamics, manipulative characters, mentions of and justifications of rape and blaming someone for their own rape.

It’s been about a month since Beomgyu officially declared war on Taehyun. 

Beomgyu doesn’t tell you much about the war but from what little he’s told you and what you’ve gathered, Taehyun’s wasn’t doing good. Even though he has gathered more allies now other than Ryujin’s father, like Lord Seojin who joined up with him after that disastrous meeting and Heejin’s family who turned against Beomgyu after she got kicked out of court, as well as their various associates, but the best they can do right now is merely hold their ground. 

Beomgyu doesn’t seem concerned about the war or the loss of some of his allies. Instead, he focuses on strengthening his relations with the existing members of his court and continually gaining the public’s support. 

“You’ve gotten slimmer again.” You comment as you move your brush over his skin, noting how his back lost much of the bulk it had when you first saw him again. “And your hair got longer." 

You’re having your painting session with just him today. Lately, he’s been so busy with meetings and the like and so he’s using this as an excuse to spend more time with you. He had volunteered to let you use his body as a canvas and now he was laying on his stomach over a large sheet as you paint his back with vivid red colors. 

He cranes his head back and grins. "You said you loved your lanky idiotic best friend."

That’s true, and he’s starting to look like him too. But will you ever be able to see him in that way again? You know your love for him will never go away–it hasn’t even waned a little bit after everything he’s done and you’re sure even if he were to kill you, your heart would pump the last of its blood with love for him. But will you ever look at him the same way again? Will you ever trust him? Will he ever be your knight in shining armor? Will he ever be the innocent warmth you seek against the coldness of the world? 

He has hurt you too much, too much. But the gods have turned their backs on you long ago and only the devil would embrace you. He beckons to you with open arms, a soft smile and the promise of the whole world in your hands. 

And how can you refuse his bastardized gift–your fallen angel–when you incited his revolt against the gods? You’re as doomed to the fires of hell as he is, you rotten sinner. 

As the bloody strokes of paint take shape, Beomgyu tries to get a peek at what you’re painting. "Are those wounds?"

“Yes.” You confirm monotonously. "Ripped wings."

“Am I a fallen angel?” He frowns at that, the negative connotations hanging in the air. 

“The devil.” 

Beomgyu pauses for a minute, perturbed by your words. You don’t know why he always acts so surprised by them, as if he just expects you to get over everything he’s done and forgive him already. 

"I am not going to get upset by your sharp words anymore. You chose me. That tells me all I need to know." He says, hurt apparent in his voice despite his words. "You pouting and sulking is not going to save him and you know that very well. So you might as well drop it and start enjoying yourself."

He shuts his eyes and rests his head on his arms again, trying to give off the impression of nonchalance, but the way the sun hits his face illuminates his thick eyebrows with a golden glow that highlights the way they are pulled together in a small frown, and hanging in that beam of sunlight are the little frustrated puff of air he lets out, like a sullen little puppy who has been chastised. 

He’s right, however. Sulking won’t save Taehyun. You know what you should do and you refuse to do it. You feel it with every dig of the dagger into your skin as you move–the dagger Beomgyu let you have back, not because you asked for it but so that it would act as a constant reminder of how your words mean nothing. 

Because if they did, Beomgyu’s back would be stained with real blood instead of paint. 

______________________________________

You chew on your nails as you anxiously await the results of Wonyoung’s test. Your menses has been late for over a week now, when it has always been a punctual visitor every month. So what could be the cause of such uncharacteristic delay? Well, there was only one possibility at the forefront of all your minds. 

You tried to maintain denial at first. You did not even mention anything to Beomgyu about it, hoping your fears would be proven wrong with time. But it was no use. He knew your schedule better than you did and he was on you after only a day of absence. 

Of course, he had turned to Wonyoung then, excitedly asking her if this meant that you could be pregnant, but she had prudently advised him to wait a few days to see if it was just tardy.

And so you did. Those few days were some of the longest of your life, the hours of the day  seeming to stretch on forever as you awaited your fate. But there was one thing that made it better–Beomgyu presence. In fact, during those few days he hardly ever left your side, choosing to relegate his duties to Wonyoung so you wouldn’t have to wait alone. 

It was heaven and hell, just like everything that is Beomgyu. That week cut in time just for the two of you was utterly joyful, and you cherished the chance to spend entire days and nights with the love of your life, wrapped away in each other’s presence. But the circumstances of that week never escaped your consciousness–the possibility that you could be pregnant a looming cloud over your sunny paradise. 

And now is the moment of truth. 

“What is it, Wony?” Beomgyu asks, jumping out of his seat as Wonyoung gets back into the room.

Her unreadable expression was like an icy grip on your heart, and her revelation squeezes it into a tenderized pulp. “She’s pregnant.” 

Beomgyu lets out a shout of joy and takes you into his arms, twirling you around before Wonyoung promptly stops him. “What are you doing, idiot? You’ll hurt the baby!”

He jerks to a halt, apologizing profusely and jumbling his words. “I’m so sorry–I didn’t realize–I’m just so…” He trails off and looks at you with teary eyes. “I’m so happy. We’re going to have a family!”  

You get teary-eyed too, but for a different reason, and just nod, not trusting yourself to speak. But Beomgyu still notices your gloomy mood right away. “What’s wrong, baby?”

You didn’t want to say anything. It was no use. Beomgyu will do whatever he wants anyway, but you just can’t help it. You burst out crying, “My child is going to be a bastard!” 

“Oh, darling.” Beomgyu coos, cradling your head and pressing it to his chest. “Wony, leave us alone, please.” 

You sob into his chest as you hear Wonyoung walk to the door and get out before shutting it behind her. Then Beomgyu pulls your head back to brush your tears away and gives you a big smile. “Our child will never be a bastard. I promised you that, didn’t I?” 

“But–” You’re cut off as he gets onto his knees. “Marry me, baby. Be my queen.” 

You can hardly take in enough breath to form your next words. “How? People will know we lied.” 

Beomgyu smiles knowingly and kisses the backs of your hands. “Who will? The public? I can easily sell them a made up story about us finding comfort in each other after the betrayal of our spouses, and even if they don’t buy it, what are they going to do? I feed and protect them. You think they’d choose a warlord and a foreign king over me? And the nobles–most of them know the truth and don’t care. They only care about maintaining their power and riches and that idiot jeopardizes that.”  

“You have it all figured out, don’t you?” You ask bitterly, your tears drying up. Beomgyu has everything planned out, even this. From you testifying in the trial, to securing the letters, to impregnating you. He is always two steps ahead of you. 

“Does it matter?” His hands squeeze yours tightly. "Don't you want to finally be my wife? To be recognized in front of everyone? Don’t you want your child not to be a bastard?"

Once again, Beomgyu comes out on top. It's so disheartening to see how someone like him can so easily twist the narrative in his favor and squash the side of the truth under his iron boot.

If you had stayed with Taehyun or spoken out against Beomgyu, would it have made any difference or would he have silenced you too? Would he have called you crazy? Locked you up? He certainly wouldn't have been able to marry you. Would that have been a punishment for him or for you?

It's no use speculating on what would’ve happened. You can't change your mind again, every time you do something disastrous happens. You have a child now. You have to protect them. 

I'm so sorry, Taehyun.

“Okay.” You give in, trying to hold your tears in but they burst forward in a loud sob. “I will marry you.” 

But Beomgyu doesn’t dwell on your obvious turmoil, and through your tears, his wide smile looks distorted and monstrous. “This is just the beginning, my love. Soon, we’ll have everything we ever wanted.”

He pulls out the ring that he once offered you on that fateful night at the beach and puts it on you. This time, there was no escaping–your once hero soon to be struck down. 

_____________________________________

Back at your chambers, Beomgyu can’t keep his hands off you. He’d gotten so excited about the news of your pregnancy that he had to retire the both of you back to your chambers so he can have his way with you. 

“Look at you, baby.” Beomgyu murmurs, prompting you to stare at yourself in the mirror that he has you positioned in front of, bare and exposed in his arms. “You’re ethereal, exquisite. You were made for this, weren’t you?”

What is this? Being toyed with? Owned? Used? 

He spreads your pussy apart with his slim fingers–the treacherous thing puffy and wet for the taking, having surrendered itself to Beomgyu long ago. 

“You’re going to be even prettier all swollen up with our baby.” 

He rubs the pads of his fingers over your clit gently, getting you as worked up as he is and making you watch your hole pathetically clench around nothing. 

“You’re so wet.” His hand slides down to scoop some of your slick on his fingers, and in doing so making you jump as his fingers brush over your hole. 

“Oh? You want my fingers, baby?" He coos, hand sliding down again so the tip of his middle finger slips in and you squeak. You’re so fucking sensitive. You feel him chuckle against your back. “Hmm, you like that, don’t you? I already got you pregnant but you’re still so needy to get filled, huh?”

He sucks in a sharp breath as he eases a finger inside you. “So tight.” He groans, stuffing another one inside, making you gasp as you grab onto his arm. You can feel his hard cock poking against your back as pumps his fingers slowly in and out of you. “Am I not fucking you enough, pretty?”

He’s really not. Yes, he fucks you way more than Taehyun ever did, but he’s still somewhat mindful of how upset you are at him and while he’s not shy about taking you, you suspect he still holds back quite a bit. 

Despite your lack of response, Beomgyu reads your reaction clearly enough. “I’m sorry, baby. We’re going to have to remedy that, won’t we?” He purrs darkly, slamming his fingers into you, the palm of his hand smacking against your clit as he repeats that actions again and again. “Just have to loosen that tight pussy up a bit.” 

“Beomgyu…” You whine, clinging onto his arm as your legs automatically try to close against the sudden onslaught. 

“No.” He growls, using his other hand to shove your legs apart. "Keep your legs spread. Want to see your needy pussy swallowing up my fingers."

You whimper, your leg muscles tensing up as your arch onto your toes and give in to his rough ministrations. 

“Yeah, that’s it. Love it when you act like such a whore for me.” You can hear his own need in his voice, and you know he won’t be able to hold back much longer. “Come on, show me how much you need it. Spread your legs wider and put your feet in the air." 

"You're such a pervert." You gasp out even as you do as he says, letting him feast his hungry eyes on your lewd display. 

“Fuck—” He can only manage a few more pumps of his fingers before he rips them away and yanks the both of you up to your feet. 

Beomgyu carries you to the bed and lays on your back at the center where you immediately spread your legs and pull them up next to your body the way you know he likes. He hurriedly takes off his clothes before climbing onto the bed with you, but then he pauses, taking a moment to loom over you with his dick in his hand as his eyes rake up and down your body. 

“Fucking perfect.” He gives his cock a couple of jerks while his other hand finds your pussy and stuffs it with his fingers once again. “Can’t believe I get to have you like this. I’ve waited so long just to have my princess warm up my bed like this every night, all spread out on her back and waiting for me to fuck her full.” 

“Then what are you waiting for?” You mewl impatiently. You hate it when he makes you wait. It exposes you for the hypocrite you are. “Just fuck me already.” 

He bites his lip, a cheeky grin etching itself onto his face. “Oh, I will, but why don’t you whine a little more for me first?” 

Like hell you will. He’s been acting like a little shit for too long now, as if he won’t cry if you close your legs and decide to leave him high and dry. 

“No. Why don’t you be a good boy instead and fuck me before I get bored and just get myself off?” You raise up on your forearms to lend more credence to your threat, and Beomgyu doesn’t care to call your bluff, not when he’s so worked up because of the pregnancy.

“No!” He yelps, and you almost get whiplash from how fast he replaces his fingers with his cock, gasping out a little whine as he slides himself into you. “You’re so mean.” 

“Me? You’re the one who is teasing your pregnant fiance when you should be keeping me fucked and happy like you promised. Or were those just empty words?” You rile him up even more, knowing it will make him lose control and it does. 

“No. I can. I can.” He insists, his hips smacking into yours. Beomgyu hates when you imply that there is something he can’t give you, partly because of his fervent need to prove himself to you and partly because he’s so afraid you’ll look for it someplace else. Your escape really fucked him up more than he already is, and so you’re quick take back your voiced doubts or he’ll go off the rails. 

“Yeah, that’s a good boy. Show me how well you can fuck me.” You clutch onto the sheets below, holding onto them as your body jostles with every vigorous thrust of his hips against your. 

God, he’s so fucked in the head but it’s hard to think about that when his cock is filling you up just right and he’s fucking you this good. And the bastard knows it too. 

“You sound so good.” He groans happily, "Come on, whine louder for me, my needy girl."

You give him what he wants. “So good, puppy. Fucking me so good.” 

“Yeah, is this what you wanted?” Even though his question might sound domineering, you can easily detect the neediness and desperation for validation he always wants from you. 

“Uh-huh.” He barely lets you affirm before his lips are on yours, tongue greedily pushing into your mouth as he kisses you frantically. It’s so good, too good, and at times like this when the heat of it all sears your brain, you can’t think about how wrong it is to allow him these moments, to give into him so easily and willingly. 

You feel his hand rest on your belly, his fingers splaying to cover as much of it as he can, and he pulls back to murmur heatedly, “Once this baby is out, I’m going to knock you up again and again. Never going to let a night pass by when you’re not filled to the brim with me.”

“Beomgyu–”

“You want it, my queen?” He whimpers, his hips stuttering but he still drives his cock into you harshly, making you struggle to keep your eyes trained on his drunken expression. “Want my cum in that tight pussy?”

“Yes. Give it to me, puppy. I need it.” You moan, pushing him to the edge. 

His hand quickly moves down to your pussy, thumb flicking your clit earnestly to help you over the edge with him, and you scream at the sudden spike in pleasure, your pussy clamping down on his cock as it spurts inside of you. 

“I love you. I love you.” He whimpers, only able to grind against you now as your pussy milks him dry, the little movement still too much on your poor pussy and your body jolts with little spikes of overstimulation each time he moves. 

With a final jerk of his hips, he’s drained. He rests his forehead against yours and presses a soft kiss to your parched lips. “We’re going to have such a big, happy family, my queen.” 

You’re so fucked out that you can do nothing but hum as he lays down next to you and takes you in his arms, the heat of his body combining with the heat in the air to keep your poor brain feverish and blissful. 

And he keeps it that way too–with his cock firmly stuffed inside of you throughout the night. You awaken every few hours by the thrusts of his hips to find yourself in different positions on the bed–once on your side with one of your legs nudged up to allow him easy access to your pussy, once plopped onto your stomach as he takes you from behind, once with your body splayed on top of him as he pushes his cock up into your pussy… every time you would whine and he would shush you, telling you to just go back to sleep and let him do all the work. 

And so you do, happy to just lie there pliantly while he brings the both of you mind-searing pleasure that chases all your pesky worries away.

________________________________

“I have something to show you, baby.” Beomgyu tells you one morning, leading you to the room adjacent to yours. 

You have no idea why he’s taking you there. As far as you know, that room wasn’t of any particular note. But you find out as soon as you step inside, choking back your emotions as you realize why exactly he was showing it to you. 

The walls of the previously nondescript room were now painted in baby blues and soft yellows–an intricate but complimenting mix of you and Beomgyu’s favorite colors–the room decorated with masterfully sculpted furniture and filled with all kinds of toys and trinkets. There was a large bed to the side for resting and even a bookcase filled to the brim with what you just know are mounds of fairytales from all over the world. But the centerpiece of the room was the small crib colored with those same soothing blues and yellows and framed by a large white drape with a statue of an angel sitting on top of it. 

It’s a nursery. He has transformed the room into a nursery for your child, and it's fucking perfect. It’s everything you couldn’t have even dared to wish for as a kid and the fact that a child of yours–you, the lowly born lady everyone regards as Beomgyu’s whore–will have this room to call their own brings tears to your eyes. 

“Do you like it, my queen?” Beomgyu asks, but the grin on his face tells you that he already knows the answer. Of course, he does. He knows you so well, that’s how he knew to make this without you even asking.

God, how can he be so demented, yet so utterly perfect?

You throw your arms around him, pulling him into a heated embrace. “It’s perfect.” 

“Our children are not going to want for anything, you know that, right?” He promises you and you nod, kissing him. And you wish he would’ve left it there, let you enjoy this beautiful moment without reminding you of the horrors he built it with. 

“But this is just the material aspect of it. We have to be there for them too. Will you be there for them?” He asks somberly, demanding that you pledge yourself to him, that you won’t choose anyone else again.

“Yes.” You answer in a small voice. 

“I want to build a good life for them, my love, keep them safe from those who would wish to harm them. Which is why I must get rid of the complications you created. You understand that, right?” 

You hold your tears back, pressing your lips into a thin line so you wouldn’t sob, and nod. “Yes.” You pull your arms off him but he holds onto them. 

He wraps your arms around him again, and kisses your taut lips. “We’re going to be so happy.”

Happy. Is that what you look like to him? Why couldn’t he have just let you enjoy this moment? Why can’t he let you live in blissful oblivion for just a few more seconds? 

But he wants you to choose, and now you have to–choose between the love of your and the child he gave you, and the man who dared to stand up to him and show you another way. 

The answer is shamefully clear to you. You wish it was harder. You wish you would’ve struggled more with it, but you didn’t. You choose Beomgyu and the baby. You can’t let your child live the same wretched life you did. You’ll do anything you can to protect them and love them and spare them from this horrible world, and if it means playing along with the delusions Beomgyu is selling you, then so be it.  

You will try to be happy, for your children. You will raise them to be kinder, gentler, and hope they grow up to be the kind of people who will despise the likes of you.  

___________________

“How is the pregnancy going? Is the sickness too much to handle? Are you taking the herbs I’ve gave you?” Wonyoung asks you when you meet up with her for tea and a chat, referring to the bouts of vomiting you’ve been going through lately. 

“Some days it’s better, some days it’s worse.” You tell her, shrugging. “But your brother is always right next to me and he makes sure I’m drinking all the herbs and eating well.” 

She smiles in relief. “That’s good. We want this baby to be healthy and happy.” 

“We?” You ask, taken aback. “You want me to have this baby?”

When Wonyoung had told you that she wanted to talk to you alone about the baby, you had internally freaked out. You hadn’t really talked to her about it ever since she revealed the pregnancy to you and you worried about what she’d have to say. 

You’d gotten so much pushback from Kai when you married Taehyun despite his initial welcoming, and it was one of the most painful things you’ve ever gone through–to finally feel like you were accepted and wanted and protected, only to have it all ripped away from you when the actual family member is in jeopardy. 

You weren’t stupid. You knew Wonyoung's priority has to be her brother’s safety and wellbeing, and you being pregnant with his child threatens that. You know that. You expected it, and you told yourself that you can take whatever abuse she has to hurl at you, that this child was Beomgyu’s way of trapping you anyway so her opinion doesn’t matter. It’s not like you wanted it in the first place…

But then why the hell is your heart almost beating out of your chest? Why are you so scared of what she has to say? Why does Wonyoung’s acceptance or lack thereof matter so much to you? 

You know. It’s because you actually want this child. You want to be Beomgyu’s wife. You want to be accepted as part of his family, to not be treated as second class. You yearn to belong, and whether by good nature or by design, Beomgyu’s family gave you that and you’re so scared of having it ripped away from you again. That’s why his plan is so effective. He knows well just how much of a hypocrite you are. 

Stop pretending to care about them.

Wonyoung frowns. “Why, of course. Why wouldn’t I? It’s what you and Beomgyu want, isn’t it?”

“Yes but…” You trail off hesitantly. “Don’t you think it’s too risky? That people may catch on?”

Despite Beomgyu earlier reassurances, you still worry that the news of the pregnancy and the intended marriage will hurt him. That’s another proof of your hypocrisy. You can’t stand the idea of him getting hurt. 

“Oh sweetling, is that something you’ve been worrying yourself with?” She coos, taking you in her arms like her brother so frequently does and you nod shamefully. “It doesn’t matter what they think. You are having this baby and we will protect you. You’re part of our family, as is this child, and we will not let any harm come to either one of you. You’re one of us now, sweetling."

Maybe she’s telling you what you want to hear just like her brother does, but you can’t help feeling emotional. They want you. They want this baby, and they’re not going to leave you behind.   

“Wait,” You sniffle, confused. “If you didn’t call me here to tell me not to have the baby then what did you want to tell me?” 

She takes her hands off you and straightens herself up. “Okay so this is not an exact science and it’s not always correct,” She starts, looking a bit unsure of herself which is a first from the usually confident princess. “But I have done a further test on the urine sample you’ve given me and I may have an inkling of what the sex of your baby is going to be.” 

You gasp, straightening up too, and waiting for her to continue with bated breath. You don’t know if she pauses for a while or if your world just freezes around you, but eventually she speaks up. 

“It’s a baby boy.” She tells you at long last, and you gasp, but she puts her hand up to halt your reaction. “I haven’t told Beomgyu because it might not turn out to be true and I don’t want you to feel pressured about it but I thought you’d like to know.”

“I-I… Thank you, Wonnie.” You gush tearfully, overcome with emotion, and she takes you into her arms, embracing you heatedly. 

You did it. You’re going to give Beomgyu an heir. Your dreams really are coming true. 

_____________________________

Unlike Beomgyu’s family, the rest of the royal court isn’t as enthusiastic about your marriage news, with some even daring to voice their opinions about how it might weaken Beomgyu’s position in the war. But Beomgyu stands strong and firm, informing them that the wedding will take place, and that if they want to try their luck joining up with Taehyun, they’re more than welcome to. That shut them up fast. Of course it helped that he could afford to splurge to buy their silence, but he was also clear that if anyone even thought about standing in his way, there would be hell to pay. 

So with the entire royal family united, and the court more or less supportive, the wedding is announced to the public, and Beomgyu makes sure to spin a pretty picture about how all this came to be for his people.

“I know this might come as a shock to some of you, and to some it may even seem like proof of what the traitors have been saying, but I ask you to hear me out before you cast your judgements.” He beseeches his people, once again playing the innocent role to perfection. "In these turbulent times, in which both me and her have gone through one of the worst pains one can imagine - being brutally betrayed by those we loved so dearly - we came to find solace in each other, and by keeping each other's heart close we found the strength to live. That's when I realized how precious it is to have had her loyal heart my whole life. First as a friend, then family, then as a victim of circumstance I so desperately had to save... and now, surprisingly, I realize she saved me as well. I now find in her a love I thought only existed in books. I find in her the only one that could truly understand my heart, that has always been by my side, that has always seen me for who I am and that I now know will be in my heart forever.” 

“I know that this announcement might seem sudden, maybe even too soon, to some of you. But it took me my whole life to realize that happiness has always been right beside me... I could not waste another day not letting her know how much she means to me. They may have been lying when they accused us of those vile betrayals, but the gods saw fit to make truth out of those lies, to bring forth love from the hate they spewed. And If we are to die at their hands, then at least we’ll die in each other’s arms.”

Beomgyu’s impassioned and romantic speech tugs on the heartstrings of those present, and they once again believe all the pretty lies he sells them. Can you blame them when he doesn’t even need to lie to you to get you to do what he wants anymore? 

Taehyun never stood a chance. People like Beomgyu will always come on top. 

_____________________________

Though the response to the wedding news has been mostly positive, it wasn’t entirely so, and Beomgyu does lose some of the public’s support because of it. It even put some of the nobles who supported him before on the fence. 

But it didn’t matter to Beomgyu, he was still on top and he was sure that he would win back all the people he lost when they saw that they wouldn’t be risking anything by continuing to support him. 

Most importantly however, he gets to marry you, and that’s what he really cares about. And so the wedding commences. 

It’s an extravagant and public event–probably not the wisest decision in the middle of a war, especially following Ryujin’s death and the accusations she and Taehyun have been hurling at Beomgyu and you, but Beomgyu didn’t want you to think for even one second that you’re less than Ryujin in any way and so he had to top his previous wedding in every aspect. He wasn’t going to settle for a small, private affair. The wedding had to be grand, spectacular–a visual representation of his overflowing love for you. 

Yes, it might’ve not looked good, but it felt good for everyone involved–the nobility who got extra benefits for standing by him, the common people who received a huge feast and precious little trinkets to keep and got to see their king walk amongst them, but most importantly you who got to finally belong to the love of your life in front of the whole world. 

That’s another proof of your hypocrisy. You adore every stupid, reckless detail of it all–his elaborate display of love and devotion for you. You eat it all up. 

The wedding was sunflower themed of course, just for you. Everything from the decorations to your veil to the huge gold necklace Beomgyu wears were either real sunflowers or embroidery and jewelry made to mimic sunflowers and the sun with rays coming out of it. Even your dress, which was the most magnificent piece of art you've ever seen, was embroidered throughout with sunflowers of all sizes. It all looked so gorgeous, the flair of yellow scattered throughout casting a radiant and hopeful glow on everything it touches. 

Still, you have the decency to feel shame and guilt about how much you’re enjoying this, the unwelcome feelings transforming the beautiful carriage you’re riding in on your way to the temple into a cage where you’re trapped with your self-deprecating thoughts. They gnaw at your feet and compel you with an overwhelming, irrational urge to burst open the door and run away from it all. But you know it’s futile, for there is a much bigger prison outside made up of the countless citizens flanking the road to watch the royal carriage pass by. You see them waving at you through the window, visitors coming to witness the curious caged bird their king has acquired.  

You can’t breathe. You can’t breathe. You can’t–

Suddenly, you jolt when you feel a hand on your thigh, and you look up wide-eyed at the queen next to you. “You’re shaking, child.” She observes kindly, and you blink. 

“Oh, I suppose I am.” You stare at your legs as you will them to stop jerking. Curious. You’ve never been known to do that anymore. It must’ve been a habit that you picked up from Taehyun…

No. Don’t think about him. Don’t let yourself go down that road. You’re doing this for your child. It’s over. 

You hear a sigh coming from the queen and your eyes snap back to look at her in shame. “I’m.. I’m trying.” You don’t know why you’re explaining yourself to her but you just can’t handle being a disappointment to one more person. You need support. You need acceptance. You can’t keep fighting anymore. 

But the royals know that all too well. They’re masters at reading people and giving them what they want. “It’s okay, child. It will all be okay. We’re all here for you. We’ll be with you every step of the way.” 

Yes, just like a warden guards their prisoner, the owner must keep their prized pet safe. But the door was open once… you were free once, and you still came back. So how can you protest now when they’re cutting your flight feathers away? 

So you swallow your useless feelings and let them guide you where they want you. You let her take you by the hand as you arrive at your destination and lead you out the carriage and up the vast steps of the sacred temple. 

She stops at the landing and turns the both of you around to face the crowd gathered beneath. “Wave to your subjects, dear. They’ve come to celebrate this day with you.” 

You raise your hand shakily, and the noise from the crowd surges in response to the small action, shouts of “My queen!” “You look beautiful!” “Gods bless you!” reaching your ear but not making it to your brain. 

You can’t process their words, can’t make out their meaning. You feel as if you’re a stranger in your own body, as if you’re watching through the eyes of someone else. 

Ryujin. That’s what she saw on her wedding day. This exact scene, and look where she is now, rotting in the ground.

“Can we go inside now?” You whisper urgently to the queen and she regards you for a second, no doubt taking in your frazzled state, before she nods and turns you around, walking you towards the grand door and giving your back to the chorus of disappointed shouts of “Stay!” “Look at me, my queen!” “Why are you leaving so soon?” and “The other one was nicer.”

That last one almost knocks you to the ground. They’re not done with the spectacle yet. Funny how in all your years imagining this very moment, you never knew that you’d be nothing more than a spectacle for these people. None of them really care. They’re just here for the show. 

You feel your knees buckling and your chest tightening but the queen never lets her grip on you wane, dragging you behind her firmly. You absolutely cannot collapse right now. You’re not allowed to. 

Wonyoung greets you at the doors, and her warm smile as she extends the lovely sunflower bouquet to you helps ground you for a second. 

“You got this, sweetling.” She murmurs in your ear when she bends down to kiss you. Your only answer to her is a shaky intake of breath as you walk through the threshold. 

As soon as you do, a line of dancers on each side of you start moving to the music that begins playing, elegantly leading the way down the aisle and towards Beomgyu in the distance. You can’t see him well from all the way over here, and you lean on the queen and try to focus on the delicate moves of the dancers as you move forward, little bursts of sun glimmering in your vision from your decorated veil, the light scattering further when refracted by the tears in your eyes–tears of happiness, tears of melancholy, they all mix together until you can’t distinguish between the two. 

You start to swoon as the queen leads you up the marble stairs and to the platform Beomgyu is standing on. Traditionally, your father would be the one giving you away, but Beomgyu didn’t want to put you through that. He didn’t want you to have to face your family on the day that is supposed to be the most joyful of your life, and so he spread word that your mother was sick and your father had to stay behind to attend to her, but that they both begged you to go along with the wedding and not postpone it. That way you’d all come across as wonderful, selfless people, just the image Beomgyu liked to sell. 

Beomgyu doesn’t wait until you’re all the way up the stairs. Instead, he meets you halfway, taking you from his mother and leading you the rest of the way to the chorus of ohhs and ahhs at the eagerness of the love-struck king. 

You are so close to fainting now, and as Beomgyu starts to lift your veil, your hands almost shoot out to stop him. 

But with the dazzling yellow reflections out of your sight and Beomgyu’s radiant face coming into view, your world goes back into sharp focus. Standing in front of you isn’t a strange man who doesn’t know his own heart, let alone how to let you into it. It’s Beomgyu, the only person as sure of his love as you are, adorned in his white and golden attire and holding everything you’ve ever wanted in his being, looking at you like you hold his own world in your hands. Nothing else matters. 

There is no hesitation from either of you as you relay your vows out loud, a sense of giddiness and almost urgency coloring the fanciful promises that pale in comparison to what you’ve already proven you’d do for eachother. You don’t take your eyes off one another for even a second, and as soon as the priest announces you husband and wife, you’re swept up in a kiss that you couldn’t tell which one of you initiated. 

The following celebration is held almost entirely outside as you share your joy with the whole city–Beomgyu seemingly intent on making up for all the times he had to hide you by proudly parading you around in front of everyone. 

You have your first dance in the spacious courtyard of the grand temple. The orchestra playing is large, as was required in order to allow the music to be carried out in the open area. It also had the added bonus of involving not only the royal's musicians but some of the more talented musicians from the common folk. Such involvement of the people in the wedding preparation and ceremony allowed the public to feel personally involved and attached to it, therefore strengthening their loyalty. It also led to some of them being paid handsomely for their contribution and further cemented Beomgyu's reputation as the kind and generous king. 

It’s an incredibly emotional moment for you. You don’t want to cry yet again but you can’t help yourself–standing here in the middle of the grandiose courtyard as not just the people present, but the heavens themselves look down on the first act of your long estranged souls claiming each other again. 

It somehow felt sacrilegious, and perhaps it is. 

After all, Beomgyu committed some rather grave sins in order to make your union possible. Maybe you should be hiding. Maybe you shouldn’t be parading around like this right under the noses of the scorned gods. But it still means so much to you that he’s doing all of this for you–the devil’s revolt for the sake of love–and you honestly can’t tell if the cold surge of nerves that freezes your lungs is because of the fear that you’re partaking in this horrible sin or because of the exhilaration of finally getting what you’ve always wished for.  

You try not to think about it much, pressing closer to Beomgyu to ward off the coldness as you let him guide you, starting from the movement of your feet up to the swelling of your chest as you take in your breaths. You follow his lead–taking one breath in and then out, just like he’s doing, and that’s when you discover how feverish he is too, his breathing shallow and rapid as he peers at you, cheeks flushed and irises barely visible. You wonder if he too can’t see the faces of those around you, if whatever mangled mixture of fear and ecstasy is only letting him focus on the person in front of him and nobody and nothing else in the universe. 

“You look… ethereal.” He confirms your suspicions, speaking with the little air he manages to breathe in. “The most beautiful creature the gods have ever created. And I can’t believe I finally get to call you mine.” 

He’s saying that to you? The man so beautiful you’ve doomed your everlasting soul to hell just to stay with him? 

But you don’t say anything. There is no need. You’re here, aren’t you? That’s all that needs to be said really. So you rest your cheek against his chest and let the beat of his heart overpower your weaker rhythm. 

The position greatly hampers the dance but Beomgyu refuses to separate you from himself to execute the moves and you refuse to let go of him. You don’t care. Let the dancers entertain the crowd. You need this more than them. 

After the first dance, the cake is served, and it is huge, superfluously so. It also required a ton of workers to make–just like the orchestra and the extravagant decorations adorning the city. It was made in the shape of the palace and you’re struck by how skillfully it was made and how similar it really looks to the palace. 

You’re given the first bite, another hidden affirmation by Beomgyu that he and all his wealth now belong to you. But the cake is so big, almost everyone gets to have a taste, even including a sizable portion of the common folk gathered around. 

The rest of the celebration is held outside of the temple walls and in the heart of the city itself that bears witness to the odd mingling of the nobles and the common folk in a strange dance that is the first of its kind. Both factions treat each other like strange zoo animals, with fascination yet guardedness, and maybe that’s for the best because it prevents any major instances from happening and disrupting the celebration. 

Of course, there are a multitude of guards keeping the peace, and especially protecting you and the royal family, but this kind of interaction is still unprecedented. But that’s to be expected from “the people’s king”. 

The city is abuzz with excitement, and even as the evening descends, the moon casts a soft, soothing shade of yellow on everyone present.

Aside from the celestial decorations and delicious snacks and drinks provided by the palace, there are dozens of booths manned by various common people to sell their wares to the crowd gathered, and you see the noble and rich flock to them to indulge in the odd street food here and there or buy overpriced trinkets to remind themselves of this strange day when they’re back safe and comfortable inside their gilded mansions. It’s a win-win for everyone involved. 

Beomgyu really made the best out of this possible faux pas. He turned the awkward wedding into a festival of sorts–a day where the rich and poor, the privileged and disadvantaged can come together and celebrate beside each other the union of the kind, generous king Beomgyu and his loyal damsel in distress. 

“Would you like something to eat, my queen?” One of the servants passing out food approaches you, and you try not to act too startled by someone other than Beomgyu calling you “queen”. 

You take a look at what he’s holding to see an assortment of strange looking sweets, most of which you’ve never seen before, but it’s no surprise. You know Beomgyu has enlisted the help of cooks and bakers from all over the world, asking them to make the delicacies of their people just for you, and this must be the result. 

“Oh, I don’t know what to pick.” You hesitate, stumped in front of the wide variety in front of you. 

“Here, try this, my love.” Beomgyu offers, picking up a reddish piece of confection and bringing it to your mouth. You open up, taking a bite out of it and humming in pleasure. Not just because of the food–which tasted delightful–but because for the first time, you don’t feel the need to shy away from his public displays of affection. You’re his wife now. You’re allowed to be together like this. It might even be seen as endearing to some, as you’ve been told. 

“Hmm, is that strawberry?” You ask, and he shrugs. 

“I don’t know.” He answers, bending down and kissing you, tasting the candy on your lips. He pulls back, licking his own lips cheekily. “Yes, strawberry.” 

“What was that for?” You laugh, incredulous at the sudden kiss. 

He shrugs once more, as careless as a little boy. “You asked me what the flavor was.” 

“You have the rest of it in your hand. You could’ve tasted that.” You chastise, no edge to your voice at all. 

“Yes, but it tastes much sweeter from your lips.” He grins, popping the rest of the thing in his mouth before pulling you into another kiss. “What do you think? Is it sweeter?” 

You hum in agreement, your hands finding themselves around his neck, without any input from your brain, and pulling him into yet another kiss that is broken abruptly when you hear a familiar tune reach your ear. 

You pull away and turn to the band who just started a new song, a song that you know all too well. You snap your head back to Beomgyu who is grinning at you. “No! It’s that ridiculous song you used to sing to me all the time!” Your outraged cackle is carried into the heavens by the light air. 

“It’s not a ridiculous song.” He protests, acting wounded. “It was the clumsy confession of a lovesick little prince that you so savagely crushed every time. Do you know how much it hurt that you not only didn’t notice what I was hinting at but that you would make fun of me every time I sang it to you?” 

“Oh, you poor puppy.” You pout mockingly. “Maybe if you sang it better, I would’ve received your inelegant confession a little more kindly.” 

He gasps, scandalized. “How dare you? Maybe you just can’t remember how good I sounded.” 

Beomgyu starts belting out the sappy love song along with the music, attracting the attention of the people around you. You squeak, embarrassed at his display, and you try to hide behind your hands and step away but Beomgyu is having none of it. He is relishing how flustered he’s gotten you. It’s been so long since he has last pulled something like this or even that you’ve been in the mood to receive it. It reminded you of your younger years and Beomgyu won’t let this golden opportunity pass him by. 

He drags you in front of him and dances around with you to the song, all while shouting out the lines and cackling every few words. This dance is much more fun and lively than your first one as you finally start letting go and enjoying yourself. 

And the difference in response from the crowd is palpable as they cheer you on. You and Beomgyu dance and laugh and dance and laugh. You haven’t gotten a sip of alcohol the whole day but you feel drunk. For the first time you allow yourself to forget everything that led up to this moment. For the first time, you are just a silly, lovesick girl getting married to the man she’s loved all her life. For the first time, you let yourself buy into the revelry of everyone around you, let yourself think they really are happy for you. 

But then you see him, the crack in your perfect illusion, the stone thrown at your glass house.

Before you stands the man you met the last time you headed down to the city before beomgyu's marriage. The man Beomgyu introduced you to as Ryujin, and the man who now must see through all the lies Beomgyu has weaved.  He doesn’t say anything to you but you can see the recognition and realization in his eyes.

Your house of deceit shatters around you, driving thousands of shards into your liar’s skin, the pain ripping you out of your selfish fantasy. 

Beomgyu quickly notices the change in your demeanor, and he follows your petrified gaze to see the man that’s effortlessly terrorizing your thoughts. He bends down to whisper in your ear. “Relax, my love, he’s not going to say anything. He’s not that stupid as to risk all I’ve given him. He’ll shut up and keep taking my money and my help.” 

And that’s what it really is. No one will ever stand up to Beomgyu. They all have families to tend to, lives to live, jobs to protect–no one will ever risk that for something as trivial as the truth. Who cares if Beomgyu is lying and Taehyun is in the right? They will still stand behind Beomgyu because that’s what will bring them more profit, more stability, more gain. They’re all liars. 

And that’s when you see it. They don’t actually accept you. They’re not happy for you. They just want what you have to give. They smile at you the same way they smiled for Ryujin, and they would tear you apart the same way they did to her if it meant they had something to gain from it.

A second look at the crowd gathered around you transforms their kind smiles into duplicitous smirks, their happiness for you into greed for what they could take from you, their good wishes into poisonous intentions. 

You feel sick. You don’t want to dance anymore. You don’t even want to be here anymore. Every eye that lands on you feels like tongues of flames, every hand a potential strangler, every soul a demon waiting for your downfall.

You can’t do this anymore. You want to go back to the palace, to be safe and away from the hell Beomgyu built around you to keep you in his clutches. 

“Baby, baby, breathe.” Beomgyu cries urgently, and you realize you’re hyperventilating. 

“I want to go home.”

“But the celebration isn’t over.” He tries to dissuade you but you shake your head urgently. “Please, take me home.” 

One look at the desperation in your eyes and he’s whisking you away from everything, tucking you under his wing and hastening back to the palace. 

______________________________________

Beomgyu tries to hold back. He tries to coax you into opening up and calming down, but you know he can’t help his excitement. This is the day he’s been waiting for for years.

“Baby, he will never speak a word of it to anyone.” He assures you, his lips following close behind his words, sealing the promise in. 

And you know he’s most likely right, but neither possibility makes you feel much better. On the one hand, he stays silent just like all the others and Beomgyu has his way. On the other hand, he speaks up, causing a small ruckus but ultimately no one believes him and once again Beomgyu has his way. 

That’s the way it is and always will be. 

“Let’s just focus on ourselves, okay, love?” He murmurs, slowly stripping you of your dress, his lips covering every inch the fabric leaves exposed until soon enough, he’s on his knees, kissing your stomach behind which your baby lies. “Let’s focus on our child.” 

You have to give it up to Beomgyu. He outsmarted you and everyone else at every turn, and here you are, standing there like an obedient little doll as he hikes one of your legs over his shoulder before burying his face in your cunt, moaning out loud at the taste of you. He takes his fill of you, his tongue insinuating itself between your lips as he laps up your arousal eagerly. He has you right where he wanted, and you begged him for it too–begged for his messed up love and attention, and now you have it, till death do you part. 

"You're finally mine. I can’t believe you’re finally mine.” He murmurs in awe as if he didn’t meticulously plan and scheme for this very moment, as if he hadn’t been dictating and manipulating your every move until you ended up here. 

You should be happy. Damn it, be happy, you bitch. You wanted this. You did this. You caused this war and you abandoned the one man who allowed you to be your own person. So be fucking happy, give in to the pleasure and decadence Beomgyu is offering you, give into his sweet, poisonous temptation that you allowed him to feed you and be done with it. Stop hanging on the fence. It’s not fooling anyone, not Taehyun, and certainly not Beomgyu. 

But you can’t. You can’t just let the luxurious celebration or the soothing moonlight or his soft touches and earnest eyes make you forget what he did to arrive at this moment–the pain, the lies, the betrayal… He didn’t just hurt Taehyun, or his father and brother… he hurt you too. It was on a night just like this–maybe as beautiful to Ryujin’s eyes–when he took you against your will in order to ruin you for other men. He didn’t listen to you as you begged and pleaded for him to stop. He didn’t care that he was breaking your heart. All he cared about was ensuring that you stayed by his side and he was perfectly willing to break you in order to achieve that. 

He forced himself into every aspect of your life–he forced himself on you, he forced himself into your marriage, how he's working so hard to erase any sign of the life you had without him. 

No, this isn’t perfect. This is messed up, just like the both of you. 

"My queen. You are the only thing I ever wanted and now you’re mine."

Have you ever not been his?

He gets to his feet, making you taste yourself on his tongue as he kisses you. Then he tries to nudge you towards the bed but you remain fixed to the ground where you stand, giving him pause.

“Come on, need you, baby.” He pouts, kissing you, but you won’t kiss back, which makes him grow frustrated. “Please, won’t you let me have you?” 

You can’t hold it in. You can’t lie to yourself anymore. This is not the dream you’ve always wanted, this is the ghoulish version of your wishes that the gods are taunting you with for being such a wretched sinner. 

"Now you're asking?” The illusion of the perfect night shatters on your sharp words. Your dream wasn’t for free. It was built on tears and blood, some of them your own. “You didn't ask when you forced yourself on me."

"Baby…" He's shocked by you bringing it up again on your wedding night. Did he expect it to just be brushed aside and not mentioned again? He probably did. He never really owned up to it, just blamed it on you, made excuses for why he did it, tried to make you forget it even happened. 

He must’ve counted on you being dazzled by the glamor of it all, on you being swept off your feet by his extravagant show of courtship that you’d forget about all his atrocities even if for one night. But you suppose even someone as smart as him can fall prey to wishful thinking.  

"What? You’re uncomfortable hearing what you did to me?" You mock cruelly and he winces. "I'm sorry." 

That makes you lose it and you slap him, unable to hold yourself back when faced with yet another lie spilling from his mouth. He holds his hand to his face in shock but doesn’t retaliate. 

"You're not sorry. You got what you wanted.” You sneer, anger bubbling up in your stomach and leaving a sour taste at the back of your throat. “But I want to hear you say it anyway. Show me how pretty you can lie.”

“Baby–” You slap him again, as hard as you can, and this time there are tears in his eyes as he looks back at you. “I’m sorry.” 

“On your knees.” You order him, and he obeys, slumping to his knees so hard the sound makes you cringe. But you refrain from showing him any mercy, drawing your hand back to slap him again, on both cheeks this time. 

He takes them in stride, quickly turning his face back to you following each one, apologies spilling from his tongue to attempt to assuage your wrath. 

But it’s not enough for you. “Say it more. Cry for me." You growl, hitting him again and again. 

"I'm so sorry. I’m sorry. I’m s-sorry."

You don’t know why you insist on hearing it when each time he says it, it fills you with more rage. Maybe it’s because you’re hoping to hear a genuine apology from him–hoping that one of his pathetic emulations of sorrow would sound close enough to the real thing to allow you to trick yourself into believing it. 

But your striking hand turns red and sore long before that fabled utterance leaves his mouth, and before his reddened cheeks and teary eyes beg you for a break.  

“Get up.” You scoff, dragging him up by his hair and throwing him on the bed, and he lets you throw his weight around without a fight. “Take your clothes off and lie down. Hands above your head.” 

You turn your back to him to go grab something that could be fashioned into restraints of some sort. You don’t have the luxury of having spare ropes lying around and maids paid and willing to restrain him the way he did to you, but you’ll make it work. 

You settle on a thin, long piece of cloth that you take with you back to the bed, only to find him still dressed. “What did I say?” 

Beomgyu flinches and starts taking his clothes off, mumbling, “Wanted you to look at me.” 

You scoff, glaring at him as he strips, but that’s good enough for Beomgyu. At least you’re paying attention to him. When he’s done, he lies down on the bed and you climb over him, tying his limp hands to the head of the bed and making sure he can’t get out of them. You are no expert in such things, and you may have put them on a little too tightly, but you don’t care. He deserves all the pain. 

“What are you going to do, my love?” He finally wagers to ask once you’re done. 

“What? Are you scared of what I am going to do to you?” You ask, and he shakes his head. “I know that whatever you do to me, I would’ve deserved it. But I also know that you love me and can’t be without me. So whatever you have in mind, do it. Take your revenge on me, hurt me, make me suffer, do whatever it takes to come back to me.” 

His words infuriate you more. How is it a punishment if he wants it? He can’t even give you that, can he? This is another means to an end for him, a way for him to get what he wants again. “You really don’t care, huh? As long as you get what you want, you’re willing to hurt yourself, hurt me, hurt anyone.” Your voice drips with spite. 

“It’s for the best.” He maintains and you rage, putting your hand over his mouth and nose, suffocating the words inside. “Shut. Up. Shut the fuck up.”

You keep your hand there for a while, smothering him, and yet he lies still, the only movements coming from him are the small jerks of his muscles as they try to jump into action to push you off before he prematurely aborts the action. He becomes so starved for air that the moment you release your hand, the breaths race to enter his body as he heaves them in, and yet you don’t hear a peep of protest from him. 

Whatever. You’ll find a way to make him hurt. You’ll find a way to have him begging for you to stop. If you’re going to let him win then you should at least make him suffer. Maybe then you wouldn’t feel as guilty for giving in.

“You want me, right? Did all of this just to get me?” You ask cryptically and he regards you warily as you climb up his body and position yourself over his face. “Then take your fill of me, baby.” 

You sit down on his face, smothering him before he gets the chance to regain his breath. You don’t know if Beomgyu doesn’t notice your intention or if he simply doesn’t care, because as soon as your pussy is on his mouth, he gets to work, kissing and licking at it as if he’s been waiting for you to do just that. 

Damn him to the seventh hell. 

You make sure to hold your sounds in as he all but devours you, his tongue sweeping along your slit, hungrily lapping up your juices that he so easily commands. Does holding back even make a difference when your body is always so honest with him? 

Yes, because Beomgyu is greedy. It’s not enough for him to have physical evidence of your desire and damning need for him, he also craves the spoken confessions, whether reluctant or enthusiastic he doesn’t care. He just wants you to say it. 

So you bite down on your lip until you taste blood, uncaring about how harshly you’re gripping his hair or how roughly you’re grinding yourself on his face. And Beomgyu takes it, eagerly mouthing at your pussy as his teary eyes peer up at you, pleading with you to say something. 

You hold in all the moans that struggle to get out when his lips wrap around your clit and suck, all the sighs that are trapped in your throat when he pushes his tongue inside you, all the “good boy”s that ache to burst out of you when he sticks his tongue out and lets you ride it. 

You only speak when the air in his lungs reaches a critical low and he finally starts choking under you. But you still don’t immediately get off him. 

"What's wrong? Want to breathe?" You taunt, and he whines into your pussy, arching his back and prompting you to glance backwards, your eyes landing on his leaking cock that is dripping onto his tummy. "You like this, you fucking pervert? Like choking on my pussy?"

He moans again, his body jerking under you from the lack of oxygen, and you finally rise up, letting him heave in some much needed breaths. Then the idiot uses that precious air to whine, “Tell me I’m making you feel good.” 

“What does it matter what I’m feeling when it has always been about you.” You hiss, reaching back and taking his cock in your hand, jerking it off slowly. “As long as you get your cock wet, nothing else matters.”

He shakes his head harshly. “No, that’s not true. You don’t even have to touch me. Just let me make you feel good.” He whines, sticking his tongue out for you to sit on again, perfectly fine with you suffocating him if it meant he’d continue to taste you. 

But you don’t. He’s not getting what he wants. Instead you grab his tongue between your thumb and index finger and pull on it. 

“Bastard.” You sneer, spitting in his mouth, but once again, that only makes him moan. 

“You’re fucking crazy, you know that?” You mutter, letting his tongue go and he pulls it back in his mouth and swallows, smiling. “I know. I wear it like a badge of honor. I never would have gotten you if I wasn’t a little crazy.” 

“Are you proud of what you’ve done?” You question in disbelief.

“Hurting you? No. Everything else, yes.” 

“As if you could separate the two. It all hurt me.” You shake your head. “You’re a monster.” 

“And yet you want me. You love me. What does that make you?” 

“Yes, I am a monster too.” You finally admit, and he smiles, smug. “Should I show you how much of a monster I can be? Perhaps I should celebrate this night how you celebrated your first wedding and get someone to take you against your will, make you feel what it’s like.” 

"I know what it's like." He grits. 

"Oh, please. You dare compare what she did to you to what you did to me?"

“It’s the same, you just won’t admit it. You’re only angry she took what’s yours. You don’t care about how I feel or how much it hurt me. You’re even blaming me for it.”  He growls, smirking bitterly when you don’t deny it. “It doesn’t matter anyway. You would never let anyone else touch me.”

“You’re right. You’re only mine. I can’t let anyone else have you.” You tell him absentmindedly, an idea popping into your brain, and you ignore how his smile gets wide, getting off him. 

“Where are you going?” He asks worriedly. The crazy bastard would rather get slapped and smothered than lose your attention. Well, you’ll give him all your fucking attention. 

You return to the bed, brandishing a new item as you straddle his legs. He frowns at the sight of the dagger you’re now holding, the metal of it gleaming in the candlelight. 

“What are you going to do with that?” He questions you, and you chuckle, trailing the sharp tip from his belly button all the way up to his neck. “Are you scared now?” 

“No.” He answers steadily, craning his head back to expose more of his neck for you. "Come on, kill me and save your precious murderer." He taunts carelessly, "You can't do it. You can't live without me."

“Oh, puppy, I know. And I know you know. You know me so well, as I know you.” You drawl, moving the knife slowly back down towards you. “And I know the one thing you’re scared of… losing me.” 

At that, you raise the dagger up and put it to your own neck, and just like that, his expression dramatically changes. 

“What are you doing? Careful.” He scolds, all confidence fleeing from his body. 

You cock your head at him curiously. “What? Scared I’ll hurt myself?” You taunt, moving the dagger downwards and pressing it against your chest.. 

“This isn’t funny.” Beomgyu tenses. 

“Oh, but I disagree.” You laugh, wincing a bit as you drag the knife over the skin above your left breast. 

“Stop it!” He screams, attempting to get out of his binds for the first time. His eyes follow the trail of blood slowly seeping out of the superficial wound. 

“But it just got interesting.” You mock, making another cut and causing Beomgyu to scream. “Please, I’m sorry. I’ll do anything, just stop it.” 

“What can you do?” You bark, “Go back in time and not rape me? Stop yourself from interfering in my marriage? Not start a fucking war to get me back?”

He clamps his mouth shut and you mutter dejectedly. “No. Of course not.”

You grab his cock again, stroking it. You pay close attention to his reactions as he tries to stay focused, tries not to let his brain fog up at the pleasure, but your touches are deliberate and purposeful, touching him just the way you know he likes, and before long you hear his little frustrated puffs of restrained pleasure. 

“Does that feel good, puppy?” You purr, gliding your pussy over the base of his cock while you cradle the head of his cock in your palm, your thumb swiping at the sensitive spot just under the tip. 

“Yes.” He huffs, still valiantly trying to stay alert but you can see the haziness taking over his eyes as he peers through his long lashes at where you’re touching. “You know just how to touch me to have me wrapped around your fingers. Please, just fuck me and forget about all this madness.” 

“Easy for you to say when you’ve gotten everything you ever wanted.” You circle your hand around the head of his cock and move it in a twisting motion that has his jaw slackening and whatever comeback he had die on his tongue. 

“Do you want my pussy?” You ask curiously as if you don’t know, rising up on your knees and lining his cock with your entrance before sinking down the slightest bit, letting the flushed head breach your hole before quickly taking it out. 

“Oh, please!” He mewls, his hips pushing up to chase your warmth. 

“Stay down.” You suddenly growl, all fake sweetness gone from your voice as you point the dagger back at yourself and Beomgyu immediately stills, whimpering, “Okay, okay, just put that down.” 

“Don’t fucking tell me what to do. You’re not in control here.” You spit at him, wishing that by saying it you could grow to believe it. For his part, Beomgyu nods obediently, keeping his mouth shut. 

You sink down on his tip once again, letting him enjoy the warmth for a few seconds before pulling off him. You repeat the same thing over and over again, for no reason other than to see him pant and whimper and struggle to stay still. 

“Does it hurt, puppy? Look how red your cock is. You must be dying to bury it inside my. tight. wet. pussy.” You tease him, punctuating every word by giving him a short taste of your pussy. 

“Yes, hurts so bad. Need you so much.” He sniffles. 

“Yeah.” You coo, sickeningly sweet to distract him from the coming attack, “Tell me, did it feel good when you forced me to take your cock on your wedding night?” 

Immediately, his defenses go up. “I had to–” 

You press the dagger to his abdomen and make a long shallow slice that has him sucking in a sharp intake of air as the trail of the dagger blooms red. “Don’t you dare lie to me. You came. That must mean you liked it. Or was that something that you had to do too?” 

Beomgyu chews on his lip anxiously, afraid to say anything that would push you off the edge right now when even his excuses can give rise to such an outraged response from you. 

“No, you just wanted to claim me. You couldn’t handle another man taking me when you’ve worked so hard on me.” 

He tries to reach out to you but the restraints keep him in place so he settles on whimpering, “I just loved you too much to let you go.” 

“Well, here I am.” You grab his cock, lining your pussy up with it before sinking down on it, sighing, “There you go, just what you wanted. Are you happy now?” 

“No. Want you to be happy first.” 

“Stop lying.” You hiss, making a deeper cut over where his heart lies. “This has only ever been about you.” 

Beomgyu he shakes his head in denial still, letting you marr his skin the same way he marred your soul. 

“No? So if I told you that I would be happier dead, you’d let me go?” You ask threateningly, pointing the dagger at your belly. “If I told you I don’t want this child, would you let me carve it out?” 

“You wouldn’t.” He croaks, tears filling up his widened eyes. 

“Are you sure about that?” You bottle up every icy tendril of fear trying to grip your heart as you dig the tip of the dagger into your skin. Beomgyu completely loses it, starting to yank harshly on his binds so hard it rattles the bed and almost throws you off. 

“Good job, Beomgyu. You almost made me stab myself.” You lie but he immediately ceases his struggle. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry." 

"Stop saying that! You're not sorry." You shout at him, and he wails as you cut yourself again.

“Please, I’ll do anything. Just don’t hurt yourself. Don’t leave me. Please, stop this.” He cries inconsolably, large teardrops splashing down his red cheeks. “If you don’t want the child then we can get rid of it. Just don’t leave me.” 

That stops you in your tracks. “You would give up our child?” You ask incredulously and he nods. “I would do anything for us to stay together.” 

His words unsettle you deeply. So even the child you’ve both been dreaming of can be sacrificed in his relentless pursuit of you? What will he not do in order to keep you? Is anything sacred to this monster you love? 

Beomgyu grows uneasy at your silence and he calls out to you in a weak voice. “Princess…My queen, please say something.”

“There is no redemption for you, is there?” You ask, and he presses his lips together stubbornly. “I don’t want redemption. I just want you.” 

And there it is, proof that there is no redemption for you either–the tightening of your chest at his heretical proclamation of his love for you.  

“You’ve ruined me. I should hate you. I should kill you… but you’re in my blood like poison.” You mutter bitterly, clenching your pussy around him in a way that has him bucking his hips up into you. You suck in a sharp breath at the spike in pleasure as his length fills you up to the brim. 

”But none of that matters to you, does it? As long as you get to fuck me, to own me.” If it’s hypocritical for you to say that while bouncing on his cock then the irony is not lost on you, but who do you have to impress anyway? Beomgyu knows you too well for that. “You only think with this cock.” 

He shakes his head but his hips have a mind of their own and they continue to thrust up into you so you discard the dagger and press your hands against them to keep them in place. “No. Down boy. You will lie back and take what I give you. Just like you did to me.” 

He whimpers pathetically but obeys. Only when you’re sure he’s not going to move do you start moving over his cock again, bringing forth more pathetic cries from him. 

“There you go, cry louder for me, my monster.” You sneer, your nails digging into his flesh as you ride him ruthlessly. 

“Yes, anything you want.” He babbles, struggling to keep his eyes from rolling back. 

“This must be heaven for you, marrying me, knocking me up… it’s everything your twisted mind wanted.” 

He nods shamelessly. “Waited so long.” 

“How does it feel then?”

“So sweet. So–ahh–so good.” 

“You want to cum, don’t you?” You narrow your eyes at him and he nods eagerly. “Already? God, you’re pathetic.” You degrade him but Beomgyu doesn’t care, eating it all up. “Only for you.”

“I know.” You say dismissively, as if you don’t crave that validation just as much as he craves your attention. “Cum then. Spend your seed inside me.”

“Yes, my queen.” He answers with the devotion of a priest offering up a sacrifice to their god. You feel his warm seed filling you up and you slide your hips against him deliberately, milking his cock. “That’s it. Does that feel good?” 

He nods. “Y-yeah… so good. Want to make you f–fuck–feel good too.” 

“Aw, how sweet. Why don’t you then?” You coo, picking up your pace over his spent cock once more. 

Beomgyu’s look of shock only lasts a second before realization sets in. But he bites his lip, holding in his cries of overstimulation. 

“What? You’re not going to beg me to stop?” You ask mockingly and Beomgyu shakes his head. “No. You can use me however you want. I’m yours to break.” 

Your lip curls up in a sneer. Once again, he won’t give you the satisfaction of having hurt him. You’re almost tempted to grab the dagger you had discarded just to make him freak out again. 

But you’re painfully close and edging yourself while letting him cum doesn’t exactly sound like a punishment for him. So you trade your energetic bouncing on his cock for more deliberate swivels of your hips that allow you to snake your hand between your legs to rub at your clit. 

Beomgyu eyes immediately follow your action. “Untie me. I want to do that for you.” 

“Oh, you want to? So I should let you, because Beomgyu always gets whatever the fuck he wants, huh? No one else matters.” 

Beomgyu shakes his head harshly, crying pitifully, frustrated that you’re twisting his words. “No. That’s not it. Just want to make you feel good.” 

But you won't give him a break, even if he's all pussydrunk. “Want. Again, it’s all about what you want.” 

“No, no, no…” He wails, shaking his head in denial, his mind too fogged up to argue with you.

“Don’t lie, Beomgyu. You said you wanted to fill me up every night, right? So do it. Cum in me until you ruin me for everyone else, just like I know you want.” You goad him. “Claim me just like the animal you are.” 

“Yes, my queen. Anything you want. I love you so much.” He sobs as he cums a second time, not trying to deny your filthy allegations anymore. As his hips buck up, frenzied by the second orgasm, he pushes you over the edge too, the both of you shuddering in ecstasy, joined together like you are meant to. 

Orgasming together with Beomgyu always feels almost spiritual, the way the barrier between your two beings blur and for a few seconds you become one. In those few seconds of utter bliss, you feel like you might just tumble into his body and never come out again. 

It’s an intense feeling and it leaves you exhausted, the both of you, but that doesn’t mean that you’re going to give him a break. Powering through the discomfort, you keep riding him, not giving him a moment’s reprieve, and Beomgyu’s body twists and squirms under your merciless ministration. 

“No more. Please stop.” 

“What? Don’t you want me anymore? You did such disgusting, sick things for this pussy, didn’t you? Acted like a rabid dog and tore down anyone who stood between you and me but now you want to stop? No, you're going to lie there and fucking take it.” 

“Please, p-please, aghhh—no more.” Beomgyu cries, his body contorting under you but you hold him in place, your hands bruising his slender body. 

You laugh at his struggle. “Come one, Beomgyu, you don’t expect me to stop just because you’re begging me to now, don’t you? That’s not what you taught me. So come on, be a good mutt and take it.”

Your pace is brutal, the fury coursing through your body searing off your nerves until you can’t feel the overstimulation and the pain anymore, the only thing on your mind is to make him hurt for what he did to you. 

And he does, cumming and crying, crying and cumming. You don’t really know how many times he orgasmed because after a couple of times, his drained balls didn’t have any more seed to give you. But his tears never stopped, overtaking his useless pleas until nothing but garbled cries left his swollen lips. 

“Nghhh–ahhh, pl…ease…” You hear Beomgyu croak when you finally slow down, and you look at his face to see it drenched with tears and drool–his lips bitten raw, his pupils dilated, his cheeks flushed, and his whole expression fucked out. “C-can’t…” 

He manages to articulate what you can plainly see. He can’t handle any more. His body trembles beneath you, and his limbs fall uselessly against the bed. He has no fight left in him. 

You grab the dagger again and point it at him. He doesn’t react, no more wise words, no more challenges, he just stares at you and waits, entirely drained. So then you direct it at yourself and he musters up energy from thin air to beg, “Don’t… leave…me.”

Beomgyu is not afraid of death. He’s afraid of being without you. You know what that feels like all too well. Isn’t that why you haven’t killed him yet? 

You use the knife to cut off his restraints, and as soon as he’s free, he reaches out to you, weakly, powerlessly, but you let him take you into his arms, embracing you like the devil welcoming a sinner to hell. 

There are dark circles under his eyes and the both of you are covered in blood but his smile is serene as he looks at you. “We finally belong to each other.” 

“I have always belonged to you, Beomgyu.” You reply defeatedly, finally giving up. 

_____________________________

A/N: next chapter is the final chapter so be sure to let me know your predictions/wishes for the end! i love to read your theories and hear your thoughts ❤️

also here's a poll. it won't affect the ending at all, i'm just curious lol

[danceswithsporks]

Awake- Part 9

Crosshair x f!Innkeeper Reader

Part 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8

*not canon to season 3*

Authors Notes: Hey so remember when I told @motte-the-goblin that the next part would be up within the week, yesterday? Yeah so apparently I meant today lmao.

I am…so unbelievably sorry for how long this took and how short it is. Lots of stuff went down since the last update and I’ve just been trying to rebound. As for the short length of this chapter, I wanted to get through everything and get them moving onto recovery but I just couldn’t find an organic way to do it. So instead this chapter came out of it.

As I did last year, I’ll be taking the next month of to reset my brain and prepare for Clone x OC week and

KATSUCON 2025! Let me know if any of you will be there! I’d love to meet up and chat clone wars/bad batch with you all!

Chapter Summary:

You wake up to a distressing call and find yourself called to duty.

Awake, once again you were lying awake in your bed, alone. The warmth that you had gotten used to was gone and in its place was empty coldness. Outside, a storm could be heard raging. On nights like this you’d usually have the door open to your private garden where you’d enjoy the smell of the rain and the cool breeze it brought with it. But not tonight. No, instead you kept everything closed and buried yourself beneath the blankets of your far too big bed as you waited for your com or datapad to ring. 

Five months, he’d been gone for five long months. The two of you spoke every once in a while. It started close to three times a week but as the weeks turned into months, it dwindled to once or twice a week. Now it was once every two weeks or so. You’d asked him a few separate times what was going on, but he never told you. 

“Takin’ care of some business.” He’d told you a few different times. 

You hated it, you hated him. Not really, but slightly. Things had finally gotten better. He was opening up to you and you’d never felt closer. But then he was gone. Just hours after finally opening up to you, he’d left. 

You thought you’d be okay. He was just a guy. A paying guest in your inn. But after the first week, you found yourself missing his scent. By the second week, you were missing his warmth and by the third week, you were just missing him. You found yourself pacing around your apartment hoping he’d knock on your door suddenly. After a moment, you’d call him in and he’d join you on the couch. You’d read your book and he’d look through his datapad. Then you’d go and lay in bed, your head on his chest, his hand stroking through your hair and the two of you would exchange more stories about growing up. Maybe he’d apologize for being gone for so long, maybe he wouldn’t say anything at all. You wouldn’t mind either way. 

A long groan left you as you rolled over and buried your face into his pillow. It no longer held his scent and that upset you. It wasn’t fair that he’d done this to you, to your heart. Rolling over away from your datapad, you nuzzled deeper into your bed and tried to force yourself to sleep. Stupid, Crosshair. Even if he did call you tonight, you’d ignore it. 

*pling pling pling* 

You practically dove for your bedside table and grabbed the datapad. “Crosshair?” You didn’t even bother to look at who was calling. It had to be him, right? He would be the only one to call you this late at night. 

“Is this Doll?” An unfamiliar gruff voice spoke carefully. 

“Who?” You looked at the information on the datapad and realized you didn’t recognize it. “Umm, yes. It is.” 

“Good. My name is Rex. I work with Crosshair. I received your information from Echo.” Rex wondered what the time was where you were. Perhaps he’d woken you up? 

Oh, Stars. Why did you suddenly have a pit in your stomach? ”what’s happened?” You were sitting up now, your heart in your throat. 

“Everything is okay.” He paused. “Well, kind of.” 

What did he mean by that? “Where is Crosshair?” 

Rex looked over his shoulder at a sound. “He’s here. But…” 

“But what?” This was it, he’d tell you Crosshair was seriously hurt, or worse! 

The former Captain sighed. “There’s been an incident. How soon can you be here?” 

Where was ‘here’? “I don’t know where you are. I don’t have a ship.” 

“There is a ride waiting for you. Please come soon.” 

The call was quickly disconnected leaving you slightly confused. There was a knock on your apartment door and you rushed to it. You found Echo waiting on the other side. “Echo?” 

Echo nodded. “How soon can you be packed?” 

-*-

You weren’t sure where you were going. You’d asked Echo a few times during the six-hour trip, all he’d told you was that it was secret. The two of you talked casually about what had been happening. How he was settling into his new role as History of the Galaxy professor at Omegas school and the few missions he’d gone on since the return of Tech. 

“He’s thinking of proposing to her, ya know.”  Echo checked over the readings of his ship as he spoke. 

You looked up from your datapad quickly. “Tech is?” 

The Domino twin nodded. “Yeah, showed me the ring today. Made it out of the crystal from his blaster.” 

A surprised sigh left your lips. “How romantic.” His blaster, the thing that protected his life. 

Echo chuckled. “Guess it is. Think she’ll like it?” 

“He could give her a rock and she’d love it. She’s head over heels for him.” You sat back in your seat and stared out the window. “What about Wrecker? Think he's planning anything?” 

“He may have asked for some advice on how to propose,” Echo smirked at you, earning a laugh. “You’re not gonna say anything, right?” 

“And ruin the surprises? No way.” You winked at the clone before looking back at your datapad. Both your friends would be engaged soon. It was hard not to be jealous. They’d found the perfect men and you were still struggling with your own feelings. You shook the thoughts away quickly earning a confused look from Echo. Clearing your throat, you decided to change the topic. “So what’s going on? Why do I need to go to you guys?” 

Echo chewed his lip, trying to think about how much to reveal. “I can’t reveal too much. It’s not my place to. But what I can tell you is that some things went sideways and you’re the only one who seems to get through to him.” 

“Echo.” You reached over and grabbed his scomp. “Is he okay? Is he hurt?” 

He looked down at your hand before looking up at you. Your eyes were filled with worry and it was clear your nerves were getting the best of you. “Physically he’s fine. I promise.” He watched as you visibly relaxed. “It’s mentally that we’re worried about.” 

Mentally? “Why?” Why was he being so roundabout about this? 

A long sigh left the domino twin. “Rex will explain it better than me.” He checked over the information on his screen. “Sit back, we’ll be arriving soon.” 

-*-

Echo led you into a large structure that had seen better days. Walls were crumbled around you and there was a clear draft. In the center of the room was a holo table with many clones around it. A blonde one stepped away after seeing you enter the room. He walked over and extended his hand to you. 

“You must be Doll, I’m Rex.” He took a moment to look you over. You were a cute little thing. Bright eyes and a nice figure. 

You shook his hand gently. “It’s nice to finally put a face to the name. I’ve heard a good amount about you.” 

Rex glanced at Echo. “So have I.” He motioned to the men around the table. “This is Howzer, Gregor, Kix, and Cody.” Each man raised a hand as Rex said their name. 

“It’s nice to meet you all.” You nodded to each one. It was odd seeing so many clones in one place. Not only was it the ones around the table, but also a few others walking around the room moving crates. Now that you saw so many together, you could see the way they all looked the same. It was almost a shock compared to how the batch looked. “Where is he?” 

“This way.” Rex motioned towards an opposite door. 

You followed the blonde clone closely. “Can you tell me what happened?” 

Rex paused and turned to face you. “The target that we’ve been tracking has vanished.” 

“Oh.” Why would that require you to come here? 

“He was a high-priority target for Crosshair. He’s not taking it well.” A loud sound came from the room nearest your group. “Echo, you should make sure the room is safe for her to enter.” 

Echo nodded, but before he could move, you reached out and stopped him. “It’s okay.” You stepped around him and reached for the door panel. 

“If anything happens, call out for us,” Rex spoke sternly. He’d protect you if need be. 

“Echo!” Kix ran towards the domino twin quickly. He stopped in front of Echo slightly out of breath. 

Echo turned to face the medic. “Kix? What’s going on?” 

“Gregor thinks we found her. Come on.” He motioned back towards the main area. 

“Dove?” When Kix nodded, Echo felt the air leave his lungs. Finally, they had a lead on her. He looked back at you quickly and when you nodded, he took off. 

Your eyes returned to the door in front of you. Taking a deep breath, you pressed the mechanism in the door and it slid open. You gasped at the sight before you.

The room was an absolute mess. Clothes had been flung everywhere. A chair was overturned against the wall and even the cot had been flipped over. Crosshair sat on the side of the flipped cot, his head in his hands. 

“Crosshair?” You carefully stepped into the room. He didn’t react to your voice. Rex cleared his throat loudly behind you but even that didn’t grab the sniper's attention. You carefully walked over to him and placed your hand on his shoulder. “Crosshair? It’s me.” He jumped at your touch. 

He lifted his head from his hands and turned to face you. “D-Doll?” Why were you here? No! No. No. No! You couldn’t see him like this. 

He’d changed a lot since the last time you’d seen him. It had been nearly two months since he’d holo called you. His hair was longer now and so was his facial hair. A full beard was now visible. It was clear he hadn’t been sleeping, the bags under his eyes were massive. “Oh, Crosshair.” You moved your hand from his shoulder to his cheek. 

“How are you here?” He’d forgotten how beautiful you were. The holos on his datapad did you no justice. His eyes shifted to Rex behind you. “You brought her here?” 

“No, Sniper.” You kneeled next to him and took his hand in yours. “I asked Echo to bring me here. I haven’t heard from you in a while. I began to worry.” Pulling his hand up to your face, you placed it against your cheek. “Why didn’t you contact me?” 

Touching you was like being home. He sighed and pressed his forehead against yours. “I’m sorry, Kitten.” A few tears ran down his cheek. “I’m sorry.” 

You took a deep breath. This was worse than you could have expected. Your free hand slid behind your back and you motioned for Rex to leave the room. After a moment you heard the door slide shut. Standing, you released Crosshair’s hand and walked around the overturned bed. Once in front of him, you sat on the floor between the bed and the wall. “Come here?” 

Crosshair didn’t hesitate for a moment to fall to the floor next to you. He moved to bury his face into his hands but was stopped by you grabbing his shoulders and pulling him into you. He buried his face into your shoulder and began to shake. The tears that burned his eyes fought to break free, but he couldn’t let them out. You couldn’t see him like this, weak and broken. He felt your hand press against his back before moving up and down. He waited for the questions to come…but they didn’t. Instead, you simply held him. 

You’d wait as long as you needed to until he was ready to talk. For now, you’d simply hold him and let him know you were there. 

-*-

Two long days passed by before he was ready to talk. You’d spent that time switching between holding him, cleaning, fixing the room, and feeding you both. Meals were brought three times a day to both of you by Rex or one of the others. You hadn’t seen Echo since the day he brought you here. 

Howzer, the one with teal on his armor, had been kind enough to bring a second cot for you to sleep on. The moment he’d left the room you’d pushed the two cots together. You held Crosshair each night, keeping him close to you. The only time you heard his voice was when he spoke in his sleep. It was hard to understand what he was saying. Only a few words were clear. 

“Hunter, duck!”

“Tech, on your left.” 

“Easy shot” 

“Hold on Mayday, hold on.” 

Mayday was mentioned a lot during those first two nights. Crosshair had told you very little about the man, the topic being a sensitive one for him. 

On the third day, your curiosity finally got the best of you. Crosshair was still deep asleep when you woke up. You would have stayed by his side and waited for him to wake up like you had the last two days. But today, you just couldn’t get Mayday out of your mind. You carefully removed yourself from his arms before slowly getting off your cot. You slipped on your boots, pulled the only long-sleeved shirt you’d brought over your head, and prayed that the pants you wore would be enough to keep you warm. You’d been in such a hurry to pack that you hadn’t even bothered to ask Echo what the weather would be like. You’d simply packed two outfits plus the one you were wearing when you arrived. Two of those outfits had short sleeves while only one had long sleeves. The only reason why you’d stayed relatively comfortable these past few days was because you’d been as close to Crosshair as possible. The clone and the blankets on the cots were enough to keep you warm. 

The door opened with a quiet whoosh as you exited the small room. While inside with him it didn’t seem that small, now that you were out in the hall and looking back into the room, you realized how little it was. Crosshair shifted on the cot and you worried he was about to wake up. But when he settled once more, you sighed and let the door shut. It took you a few tries to find your way back to that main room you’d been in when you first arrived, but after a long fifteen minutes, you found it. You hadn’t realized how early it was when you were in the room. But now that you stood in the almost empty control room, you realized just how early it truly was. 

“Howzer?” The teal clone stood by the holo table with a mug in hand. Steam swirled in the air above it and the familiar scent of coffee filled the room. 

Howzer looked away from the holo table in surprise. He hadn’t expected to see you this early and without Crosshair. “What are you doing up this early?” The Captain looked you over before catching the way you shivered slightly. 

“Couldn’t sleep.” You shifted as he walked to the side of the room and picked up a dark bundle off one of the crates. He crossed the room over to you and held the bundle out to you. “Thanks. You?” 

“One of us is always on duty at the table. Just in case someone contacts us.” He watched you unfurl the bundle and look it over before pulling it on. “Trouble sleeping, huh?” He stepped closer to you and tugged the robe gently. Adjusting it so it sat better on your shoulders and didn’t pull on your neck. The Jedi that had owned it before would have been happy to know it was being used again. 

The robe was so warm and comfortable, that you sighed softly as warmth began to spread through your body. You nodded as the clone in front of you adjusted the garment a few times before stepping away from you. “Got a lot on my mind.” 

Howzer motioned towards the other side of the room. “Like what?” 

You followed him around the holo table and towards a steaming pot. The scent of caf was becoming stronger and stronger. “Well…” you chewed your lip in thought for a moment, trying to figure out how to breach the subject. “I was wondering something. Were you…part of the Empire too?” 

He froze at her question, the clean mug in his hand shaking slightly. “I was.” 

“What…was it like? Did you know Crosshair then? Did you also have a Jedi?” The questions seemed to race out your mouth before you could stop them. You took a long breath to try and stop the rest. “Sorry” 

Howzer shook his head and fought off the urge to laugh, you were cute. He finished pouring you a cup of coffee before answering. “It was different, I did, and yes, I did have a Jedi.” He passed you the mug. “Drink this, it’ll help ya warm up.” 

You blushed slightly before taking the mug. It felt nice in your cold hands. “Thanks.” You took a small sip of the warm drink and visibly recoiled slightly. That was some of the worst tasting coffee you’d ever had. 

A chuckle left Howzer as you took your sip. “Not the best tasting stuff in the galaxy. But it gets the job done.” He motioned over to a set of crates set up around a larger crate. “How about ya start at the top and I’ll answer what I can.” 

“What was your Jedi like?” You sat on one of the crates and placed your mug on the larger crate that seemed to act as a table. 

“He was a brave and caring man. Don’t know how far my men and I would have made it without him.” He stared down at his mug for a few moments. “We lost him a few weeks before everything changed.” Howzer looked towards the holo table. “How much has he told you about what happened?” 

You took another sip of the warm drink before answering. “He told me about Order 66 and what it entailed.” 

Howzer gave you a softened look before shaking his head. “You honestly shouldn't know about it. Not the type of things civs should hear about.” 

“Civs?” Your head tilted to the side. 

“Civilians.” Another voice echoed across the empty room. 

“Cody.” Howzer nodded to the ex Marshal Commander. “Doll had some questions that were keeping her awake.”

Cody nodded and stroked his growing beard in a way that Rex had told him reminded him of Kenobi. “I see.” He walked over to the two of you as Howzer stood and grabbed another mug of caf. “Like what?”  

“What it was like being a part of the Empire. What his Jedi was like. If he knew Crosshair then.” Cody was the one in orange. You could clearly see small spots of gray poking through the paint, probably best you didn’t ask about that. Your nails tapped against the ceramic of the cup in front of you. “Could I ask the same questions to you?” 

“You can.” Cody settled on the crate and watched Howzer bring over the coffee. “I worked in the Empire for a while as well. Even worked side by side with Crosshair. Never seen a more skilled sniper in my life. The last mission I did was with him.” 

“What do you mean the last mission?” Your hands gripped the mug in your hands tightly, the warmth of it finally getting to your bones. 

The once Marshal Commander took a long sip of his drink before speaking. “Soon after that mission, I tried to walk away from it all. I’d seen too much and been through too much. I couldn’t take it anymore. Someone higher up heard about my plan to go AWOL. I was captured before I could even try to leave and taken to Tantiss. The same place Crosshair would later be imprisoned at.” 

“Oh.” You swallowed. Maybe it was best to change the subject. “Did you have a Jedi you worked with?” 

“Yeah, he was an amazing General. Saved my life more times than I can count.” And yet he’d killed him. Shot him down mercilessly. He remembered the feeling of seeing his body move on its own and fire at him. The way he fell from that wall. “Wore a robe just like the one you’re wearing.” He motioned to the garment wrapped around your body. A part of him wanted to reach out and touch it, to feel the familiar material against his fingers at least one more time. 

“This was a Jedis robe?” You looked down at the dark brown garment. A Jedi had worn this before you. You looked at Howzer quickly for verification. The teal clone nodded to you before looking away. “I feel honored then.” 

The three of you fell into silence for a few minutes. Simply enjoying the silence and the company. Cody was the first to speak. 

“Something tells me there’s more to why you couldn’t sleep.” You awkwardly shifted across from him and it was all the answer he needed. “Ask away.” 

You took a long breath. “What do you know about a clone named Mayday?” 

-*-

You sat on a crate outside on the landing pad deep in thought. The robe was still pulled tight around you. The sun was up now and slowly warming the air. Thoughts on what you’d learned about Mayday ran through your head. You knew he was dead, that was something Crosshair had told you. It was how he died that had taken you by surprise. If what you’d read was true then poor Crosshair had been through so much more than you realized. 

“Doll?” A familiar voice called to you from the hangar doors. 

You turned and locked eyes with the man you’d been thinking of. “Crosshair.” 

He quickly moved across the landing pad as you stood up from the crate. The moment he was in front of you he pulled you into a tight embrace. “I thought you left.” 

“I wouldn’t leave without telling you. I just needed some fresh air and time to think.” Your face nuzzled into his chest. It was clear he hadn’t showered in a few days, the smell didn’t bother you too much. 

“Think about what?” His face buried into your hair and he inhaled deeply. Yes, this scent, your scent, you were his peace. 

You hummed softly as you listened to him inhale. Should you tell him that you were thinking about him? About what he’d gone through? About Mayday? “Well…” Your mom would tell you that honesty was the best policy here. “About you and what you’ve gone through and…Mayday.” 

“Mayday?” Crosshair pulled away from you and looked down. “Why would you be thinking about him?” 

“Because you’ve mentioned him at least thirty times in your sleep since I’ve been here.” You pulled away from him and walked past him. “I know what happened to him, to both of you. Or at least the details that are in the reports.” 

Crosshair turned and stared at you. “How?” 

A lump seemed to form in your throat. “I asked Cody and Howzer.” 

“What?” He stormed across the platform and over to you. “Why the hell would you ask them?” 

You turned and faced him, anger boiling inside of you at the way he was speaking to you. “Because you would never tell me!” 

‘Stop’  You thought to yourself. This wasn’t on him. What you had learned about that mission from the reports Howzer had found made it clear it was bad. You could only imagine how much worse everything was. A long sigh left your lips as you tried to calm down. 

“It’s been almost a year, Crosshair. We’ve known each other for almost a year now. I don’t expect to know every single detail about your life. But I would hope you’d feel more comfortable opening up to me. Especially now when you’re clearly going through something.” You stepped forward and raised your hands to his face. “Crosshair, please.” Gentle hands cupped his face as pure eyes stared into his. “Open up to me? Let me know the real you.” 

“You couldn’t begin to understand what I’ve been through.” Crosshair tried to pull away from your hands but found himself stopped. Instead, he shifted his eyes away from yours. 

As he looked away from you, you felt your heart drop. The past couple of days had revealed his weaknesses to you. The way he struggled to come to terms with whatever was eating at him had shown you just how deep it truly went. His was so much more than simple nightmares. Whoever this high-priority target was, they had a strong connection to Crosshair. Were they the source of his nightmares? Or just a small part? 

None of it mattered to you right now. All that mattered was him and how he was feeling at this moment. It was clear he was nervous about you learning something or worried that you wouldn’t understand and thus be unable to truly help him. But you’d do whatever you could to help him. You’d take him how he was, with all the baggage included, and make him whole once more. You’d push out the darkness and guide him to the light and be his everything. 

The realization of how much you genuinely cared for this man, this clone who’d started out as a stranger and a renter in your inn, was astonishing to you. In this moment you truly understood that the two of you were a part of one another now. All you wanted was to ease his pain and for him to be happy. You cared for him so much. 

You…loved him.

Your eyes shook as you moved closer to him. “ Let me try, Sniper. Let me be the one to listen to you and know you. Let me love you.” You cooed sweetly to him while stepping forward and pressing your body against his. “Let me be yours, Cross.”

There it was, out in the open finally. You wanted to be his. You wanted to love him and keep him close. To give him all of you and accept all of him. 

Crosshair felt like his heart was racing. This was everything he’d dreamed of. Even before he met you. “I…” he gripped your shoulders tightly and tried to push you away even though his heart was yelling at him not to. “I can’t. You can't know the things I’ve been through, the things I’ve done.” 

“Crosshair.” You followed him as he tried to push you away. “I want to know everything you’ve been through. Everything you’ve done. The good and the bad. All of it.” 

“Doll, you say that now. But once you know the truth there won’t be any way to take it back. I’ve done dark and terrible things.” He hesitated as his body began to shake. “I can’t…I can’t risk losing you. Not yet.” 

“Hey.” You reached up and cradled his face once more, making sure he was looking into your eyes. “Nothing you’ve done, and I mean nothing, will change how I feel about you or think about you.” You stood on the tips of your toes and pressed your lips against his. He hesitated at first to return the kiss but soon his arms were wrapping around you and holding you tight. His lips danced against yours in desperation. You pulled just far enough away so you could speak once more, your lips brushing against his. “I promise.” 

Crosshair fought the nervous energy racing through his body. He pressed his lips against yours in what he feared would be the final time. “Okay.” He truly hoped you’d be able to keep your promise.

 But deep down he feared you wouldn’t be able to. 

Tag list:

@rndmpeep @sarahskywalker-amadala @queenariesofnarnia @idoubleswearimawriter @bambambunny @ravenclawbitch426 @jupitersaturnapollo @mzjakao @heylosers06 @dangraccoon @impala1967666 @andrakass2 @ducks118 @motte-the-goblin @rintheemolion @merkitty49 @jediknightjana @onyxtides @moon-wrecked @mssbridgerton @griffedeloup @masterjedilenawrites

[rosenongrata]

heavy in your arms – i

Summary: After losing a challenge against Dr. Ratio, Kagome feels herself to be indebted to him. She returns the “favor”, only to be surprised by his sudden compassion and consideration.

A/N: RAHHHH I LOVE THESE TWO TOGETHER FOR SOME REASON. WHAT. FUCK IT WE BALL?? anyway. this is. very much didn't have a definitive plot in mind lmaooo. enjoy anyway ? might write a pt2 or smth. lol we'll seeeee

c.w/s:MDNI/NOTSFW. OC x Canon, OC-insert. soft Ratio hours. slightly implied past SA in the OCs past (not by any characters), but it's rly vague. oral sex (OC/fem receiving). soft soft soft times. have i said it's soft? anyway, if i forgot something, hmu!

w.c: 1.2k

“Dr. Ratio…” Kagome mutters, gloved hands on his thighs – he can feel the nervous tremble in her palms, extending to her whole body. “Please…be gentle with me—” She clears her throat as she sits on her knees in front of him, “Th-this is a mere favor, s-so don’t test my patience—”

“You can call me Veritas now.” He sighs, one of his fully unclothed hands snaking its way to cover her own – but it only makes her tremble and grimace further. “This is no demand from me, I am certain you know this… Correct?”

“Y-Yes, sir…” She nods and stares up at him, her pupils constricted with what he assumes is fear.

He sighs again, eyes now laden with mild frustration and mostly confusion, “Kagome.” He grabs both of her hands, causing her heart to jump into her throat as he pulls her to her feet, “I will not allow you to do this if you are frightened. I do not know exactly what is causing your fright, but I will not be taking advantage of it.” He informs, voice heavy with severity.

“My apologies…” She turns her head away – eyes screwed shut – but he’s quick to angle her face back toward him, “Huh?” Her eyes blow wide open again while a nervous sweat breaks out on her forehead and neck.

“Do not apologize for whatever you believe you did wrong. You have neither offended or upset me thus far. So, quit apologizing over nothing.” He commands with an abnormal amount of fragility in his tone.

“I-I– But, I–”

He presses his lips against her own – deep and fierce, but not with an ounce of roughness. One of his hands slips over the back of her head while the spare one cradles her lower back. She gasps from the shift of words to action, a moan soon following after – leaving wonderful tingles along his lips.

“If you cannot stop apologizing, then I will simply have to silence you.” He smirks, soft and hot breaths brushing against her velvety smooth lips.

She blinks repeatedly – for once taking a long moment to register what’s happening. He lets her take an adequate amount of time, his gilded stare watching her diligently – taking in every subtle reaction she has. Despite their many years of knowing each other, he’s never seen her so emotional – let alone distraught – before now. It makes the hardy plaster around his heart crack a little – it’s not everyday you get to see a member of the Genius Society fall apart before you.

He takes no pleasure from this experience of witnessing her be so scared of him, yet he finds so much intimacy in being what feels like the first person to see her like this – fragile. While he may be as sturdy as stone, he keeps a silent promise to treat her like porcelain.

The fit of giggles that break out from her tears him away from his thoughts, eliciting him to raise a thin dark purple brow.

“What is so funny?” He inquires, leaning dangerously close to her face again.

“Aha– I’m so sorry. I just– You…you’re really, truly, utterly horrific at kissing.” She continues to giggle, “A-And you’re so dorky… So confident about everything you do and are, even smirking when you get a reaction from me… It’s…rather cute.” She flusters, her laughing dying down as she glances anywhere else that isn’t him.

“…I am truly flattered, Kagome.” He deadpans, his voice flooded with sarcasm. “Then, if you are so skilled at kissing… Teach me.” He smirks once more, slowly backing her up into the nearby wall of his office – all with his hands firm on her curvy hips.

“…Proposal accepted. However…” She breathes – the sweet scent of the sakura mochi she had earlier hits his senses, “Do know it’s merely a matter of…experience.”

“I am happy to inform you that I am more than willing to learn.” His lopsided smirk evens out into a thin smile.

Her eyes latch on to his thin lips, all while her hand brushes some of his dark locks away from his eyes. “And…take your time, there’s no rush… I plan to give you ample time.” She snickers, planting a hesitant yet soft kiss on the corner of his mouth.

The praise brings an odd sense of warmth and shyness to all of him, a blush rising to his cheeks despite his slight grimace.

“Hush,” He commands, “Let me conduct my experiment now.” He pivots his head to fully meet her lips again, pressing his mouth deep against her own with his body flush against hers. This time he holds back on his passion, easing his way into her heart – all with her soft, delicate lips in mind.

“V-Veritas!” Kagome heaves, soft moans rolling off her tongue, “Y-You’re improving so quickly – ngh!” Her toned leg quakes as it rests over his broad shoulder, her other leg is the only thing barely holding her up all while he noses her clit and devours her core with heated, fervent licks and sucks.

When he removes his head from her heat – lower face covered in her wet lust – he grins up at her while licking his lips.

“A higher rating… Now I am more than confident I will get you to cum with no more wasted time.” He immediately dives back in, his licking and sucking even more passionate than before.

His suspicions are correct, too – so he swiftly takes her other leg and rests it over his free shoulder as well. She gasps – with her tearful eyes and broken smile – she finds his ability to hold nearly all of her weight up sexy and endearing. She braces one hand against the wall she’s pinned against, her free hand grabbing a fistful of his thick locks and pulling him further into her.

One of his hands leaves her thick thigh, moving to slip two fingers into her heated, dripping wet hole. A sharp gasp and heavy moan leaves her as she shakes and screws her eyes shut. She moans loud and clear when his fingers curl against her walls, pressing onto a sweet spot.

“Yes, that’s a good girl.” He detaches his mouth from her overstimulated clit, “Now, cum for me.” He commands before giving her clit a hard suckle.

“MMH – NGH–!” She bites down on her bottom lip, nearly breaking skin. Her eyes roll to the back of her head as she throws it back against the now warm wall.

She does cum – all over his chin and mouth, leaving streaks of white fluid along his lips which he promptly licks off. He even sucks his fingers clean, groaning softly at the taste of her.

“Delectable.” He remarks, leaving kisses on her folds a few times before he rises to his feet, moving her legs to wrap around his still-clothed hips while he shifts his position.

“Wh-what a good boy you are, Veri…” She whispers lustfully, grabbing his chin between her thumb and two other fingers. “Now… About that…favor.”

“Do not worry yourself to death about that damned favor. All I need you to do is sit back and relax… I will take the utmost care of you.” He presses several gentle kisses up her neck, moving his way to her jawline one kiss at a time. “…Are you ready now or shall we wait until a proper time and place? My office is hardly the ideal location for me to take you.”

“Let’s have a nice little date first… No formalities or facades – only ourselves in all earnesty. You can pick the time and place… I don’t mind.” She pulls his face to her own, planting a feather-light kiss on his lips,

“Impress me, Veri.”

[twstgo]

👁behold👁 oc x canon asks upon ye 💥✉👐✉✉👐💥💥

i am curios, what about 15 and 49 for both jamiliz and malbeau?

-diodellet

woe oc x canon ask be upon me ✉️👏🫶🔥 THANK YOU DIO!!!

15. How do they comfort one another when the other is upset?

jamiliz:

when Liz is upset Jamil offers to let her help with his tasks for the day, the type of menial chores that she as a busybody would appreciate doing to get her mind off things

Liz in turn does not bother Jamil directly if she knows he’s in a bad mood, opting to text him encouragement and remind him she’ll be ready to hear him out once he’s done internally processing

at the end of the day though both set time aside to sit down and pamper the other while they air out whatever leftover grievances need to be said

malbeau:

Beau doesn’t like letting others know that he’s upset about anything ever and Malleus isn’t one to offer his own struggles on a silver platter. instead of confronting it directly they find themselves walking along the campus grounds while they quietly talk about whatever topic comes to mind, the brief stint of escapism does wonders. at one point Malleus (presumably) jokingly offers to be rid of both their problems but Beau is quick to shoot that down, in the grand scheme whatever upset them didn’t need THAT dire a measure

49. Is there a word or gesture that makes either of them melt?

jamiliz:

answered in this post!

malbeau:

Malleus finds the simple act of Beau smiling carefree something he’s been quickly endeared to. he notes that it makes Beau appear a lot more youthful, has even commented on it and found that the awkward smile he was given in response wasn’t as satisfying

Beau is embarrassed to admit it but he enjoys any physical affection related to comfort, particularly whenever Malleus threads his hand into his hair and massages his scalp. the first time it happened Beau subconsciously leaned into the hand completely relaxed, mortified once he snapped out of his stupor to see the Malleus’ mildly smug expression

Ask Game

[nailamoonsi]

OC Interview. [Antonio Chandrani-Rivera at 20 years age.]

Are you named after anyone?

... It's already well-known who I was named after.

When was the last time you cried?

What kind of question is this? This wasn't in our write-up. Why would I tell an interviewer when I last cried?

Do you have kids?

I know that when I was 15 I'd go on about how much I wanted a family. Truth is, I might still, but... I used to have such assumptions about the future. At this age, I wouldn't mind adopting children.

Do you use sarcasm a lot?

:)

What’s the first thing you notice about people?

What else? Their feelings toward me I know too well. Everyone knows I'm disliked, it's true, but what's unbearable for me is...a certain kind of worry.

What is your eye colour?

Everyone knows I'm red-eyed. Our hearts bleed and infect everybody. ...Oh, you meant what was? Yes, yes, my eyes were a gorgeous dark brown, once. Swear I've brought up a million times by now. Ugh. Upset with you? Yes, I am, actually. >:(

Scary movies or happy endings?

Happy endings especially for romances are cute and all, but isn't it nice when someone you like grabs your arm because they're scared? >:)

Any special talents?

Cloud-surfing. Literal clouds, I mean. Not as good as Raj and his piano skills, I know. ...What? Aren't you well-warded? What's with that stress point between your eyebrows? You know, I did like bothering Alejandro and seeing if anything around him would catch fire only two or so years ago. Isn't that a special talent, knowing how to turn the Protector's temperature up? I suppose everyone knows I can dance, too, when I think about it.

Where were you born?

What? You can look that up on a wiki. What's with some of these questions? Are you troubled I know Alejandro's temperatures?

Do you have any pets?

Now I miss Sally...my baby. 🥺

What sort of sports do you play?

In the past, Alejandro kept dragging me to so many of his games and kept pulling me into playing them, too... Oh, you winced. I knew you would. Anyway, I'll never lose at the oceanic arts, but I sometimes miss those days I'd have to manage crazy goals and all those annoying hoops.

How tall are you?

Oh, I stopped keeping track after 18. I wound up a bit shorter than Alejandro and Diego in the end--stop wincing so much. I think I'm around 186 centimeters. Isn't Alejandro 188 centimeters? I'm only 20 though... Maybe I'll still catch up to or surpass them.

What was your favorite subject in school?

Astronomy. History, too... Sometimes I miss running around and looking for artifacts the way I used to.

What is your dream job?

I know the fame of several Chandrani family members persists, but... I don't find it terrible to do our family's calling, you know. Many of us have been, of course, most obviously alchemists, but also translators, rune decoders, teachers, computer scientists, historians, archeologists, and the like. I'm pretty content with the ocean depths and all my books. ...No, I'm not lying. Who even are you? When I think about it, when was the last time anyone would interview m--

When was the last time you cried?

...

When was the last time you cried?

What...?

When was the last time you cried?

I won't... am I dreaming?

When?

You... You. You'll pay for messing with me again, djinn.

---

The last 3 repeat questions aren't part of the typical interview; just messed around with the end of it! Thank you @ceph-the-ghost-writer for the tag!

Tags and clean interview questions:

I'll tag @scorpiothesaint @halfbit @darthnell @words-after-midnight @frostedlemonwriter

@alnaperera @anyablackwood @ryns-ramblings @lonelyyvampire @autumnalwalker

Here's the main questions:

Are you named after anyone? When was the last time you cried? Do you have kids? Do you use sarcasm a lot? What’s the first thing you notice about people? What’s your eye colour? Scary movies or happy endings? Any special talents? Where were you born? Do you have any pets? What sort of sports do you play? How tall are you? What was your favorite subject in school? What is your dream job?

[creativepawsworld]

Silence - Chapter 48

Pairing = Thomas Shelby x OC

Summary = Ana and Tommy great ready to go to the Garrison for Michaels 18th Birthday celebration and his official welcome to the family. 

Warnings = Sexual Content...18+... Mature Readers Please... Little Rough...Language...Grammar... Implied cheating... Kinks explore...

Word Count = 2.363

Note = I know I have been awful with updating lately but I am hoping to get onto a more steady writing / update train. With the weather turning once again I mean. As anyone from the Ireland /Uk / Northern Ireland (like me) will know we had stunning weather and I had to get out in it, spend time with the kiddes and fixing my garden. But yes it has unfortunately turned again so I should, should be on a better updating track....Thanks all for staying with me though so much love and appreciation from that! 

I was finishing getting ready for Michael's 18th birthday in The Garrison. Polly wanted to officially welcome him to the family. He seemed like a sweet kid, if he was mine would I want him to be involved with the things they do, probably not. But then I pictured my child. What would they grow up to become? Would they follow in their father's footsteps? Would their father even be around long enough to watch them grow up?

I fought back the tears at that thought.

The door to our bedroom opened and Tommy walked through the door adjusting his tie. I quickly reached up brushing the tear from my face, instantly hiding any trace of a tear. I cough slightly to clear my throat as I look at Tommy through the mirror. He was just staring.

“What?” I asked sharply. I was still a little frosty with him after what he said to the horse trainer back at the Garrison earlier in the week. Not to mention the fact he forgot to tell me it was a woman.

“Were you crying?” He asked stepping towards me, his eyes holding mine through the mirror. His hands came to rest on my shoulders, rubbing the tension from them softly. “What’s got you upset?”

“Nothing” I shook my head using a brush to apply my blush.

“Stace don’t lie to me eh” Tommy sighed, his shoulders dropping slightly as he pulled his plump bottom lip in between his teeth.

“But it’s alright for you to lie to me?” I asked him glaring at him through the mirror.

Tommy bent over, placing soft kisses on my neck, moving his way down from behind my ear. Nibbling slightly as he moved along, reaching my collarbone. He pushed the shoulder of my dress from me, it was rather easy considering I hadn’t been zipped up for the evening yet.

“W..what do you think you are doing?” I asked leaning my neck to the side allowing him more access. “You can’t just… you can’t just..”

“Worship you like the Goddess you are?” Tommy whispered moving back up to whisper in my ear. He rested his chin on my shoulder staring at me through the mirror. A genuine smile on his face. “You look beautiful.”

“Don’t try and sweet talk me, don’t you dare try and sweet talk me.” I stood up thinking that Tommy would move away from me. Instead, he kicked the small backless chair away with his foot, stepping into its place. His arms wrapped around my waist, his eyes never once leaving mine through the reflection.

“You’re the only woman for me Stace, when are you going to start believing me with that?” Tommy asked, his face serious as he stared me down through the mirror.

“When you stop lying to me about horse trainers and asking them if they wanted to fuck you or not.”

Tommy laughed as I said this. He found whatever I had to say amusing. I rolled my eyes, fixing the shoulder of my dress back up to its place. I tried to reach behind me to zip up the dress but Tommy was standing too close, blocking from hands from actually reaching the zipper.

“The name on the card Mrs Carleton gave me had her husband's name. Therefore, I believed I would be dealing with him. It was only after our talk at the betting shop, did I find out he was in fact deceased. His name carries his reputation so it appears even after death Mrs Carleton is using his name to her advantage.”

“If you were to die, would like me to return to my maiden name?” I asked trying my best to glance at him over my shoulder but due to his closeness, it was impossible so I settled for watching him through the mirror as I asked the question.

“And when are you taking my name, Miss Adler? You have made no wedding arrangements. I was led to believe you didn’t want it.” Tommy smirked through the reflection. “But to answer your question no. You do not lose the Shelby name once you take it. You will forever be my wife, even long after am gone.”

I smiled softly at his words. Reaching up I tuck a strand of blonde hair behind my ear, looking down at my make-up on the table below me before looking back up into his eyes.

“And you Tommy? Will you forever be my husband? Even long after am gone?” I asked in a whisper.

“Always.” Tommy nodded.

“Then why ask other women such a question?” I asked. I hated myself for ruining the soft moment that was occurring between us. They were few and far between with everything going on at the minute. With my parents in hospital and Tommy’s one-manned war against the Italians in both London and right here in Birmingham, our time seemed to disappear. I felt I spent more time with Polly than I did with him.

“It was a straightforward question with a straightforward answer. Regardless of what she came back with my answer would have remained the same. With or without you standing there.”

I looked into his eyes, looking for any form of lies, any form of deception but they were clear. Crystal blue, hypnotically blue. After spending the past two years of my life with him I knew what he was trying to do with those eyes. And it worked every time.

“I don’t like you asking questions like that Tommy, it makes me feel inferior, inadequate,” I whispered letting him know honestly how it made me feel.

Tommy turned me around by my hips so he could look deeply into my eyes. I could feel his fingers digging into my hips, enough that I would notice but not enough to leave a mark.

“You are my woman Anastasia Adler. No other will ever compare. I am a man of many things but I am not stupid enough to throw away a woman like you.” He spoke so strongly, so confidently I felt myself believing every word to leave his lips.

I looked up into his eyes innocently as he stared down into mine with what I could only describe as with deepest desire. I felt his hands move up from my hip over my breasts before reaching my shoulders and slowly pushing the top of my unsecured dress from them. His eyes never left mine as the dress fell from my arms, the bodice falling with it, getting stuck at my hips.

Tommy turned me back around so I was now facing the mirror, his lips attaching themselves to my lips leaving soft delicate kisses along the jugular vein on my neck.  His hands came around resting on my baby bump before pushing the dress from my hip, letting it pool around my feet. I blushed looking at him through the mirror, I was standing before him in my underwear.

Nothing was said as Tommy kept my gaze moving around my neck and up to my ear tugging on it gently with his teeth. I swallowed deeply, my eyes fluttering closed as my blood rushed between my legs, leaving a pool of heat and want, making a mess inside my panties.

Tommy’s eyes held nothing but mischief as he ran his hands along my body, squeezing my breasts in his hands before sliding down my bump, one hand staying on to caress our baby as the other disappeared further south. His finger grazed along my clothed core as a pathetic whimper left my lips.

I felt him chuckle breathlessly on the back of my neck as he kissed his way down my spine and back up, his finger rubbing soft circles on my clothed clit.

“Tommy” I whispered out a moan, leaning back into him.

“Open your eyes darling, look at the pleasure I can give you,” Tommy instructed.

The minute I opened my eyes, I was met with his dark, lustful eyes through the mirror. His finger started to pick up the pace before slipping beneath my underwear, touching me exactly where I needed him to touch. I gasped a silent scream as he held my eye contact, two of his thick fingers sliding inside me.

“Look at how beautiful you look, filled with nobody else but me” Tommy almost growled, darkness taking over his eyes as he worshipped my body all while maintaining eye contact through the mirror. I felt myself closing into a peak already.

“Tommy” I whined, feeling myself getting flustered. My thighs clenched around his hands as his fingers moved in and out his lips assaulting my neck. The pressure was building inside my stomach, it was ready to explode.

“Let it go darling” Tommy bit into my neck, leaving a mark but also popping the balloon inside me. A white light blinded me for a second as I gripped the dressing table for support. “Good girl” Tommy licked at my neck and I couldn’t help but purr out to him.

“You like that love? You like being my good girl” Tommy asked unbuckling his belt, putting his hands on the top of my back and bending me over. My face was so close to the mirror that every time I exhaled, the condensation would show up in the mirror. “I asked you a question,” Tommy spoke again, slapping my bare butt cheek.

“Tommy” I squeaked turning to look at him over my shoulder as he spanked my ass.

“What’s wrong love?” Tommy smirked slapping my butt cheek a little harder, no doubt leaving a red mark.

“Oh god.” I whimpered dropping my head to my chest feeling immensely turned on by his behaviour.

“Answer me Stace” He demanded spanking me harder. “You like this don’t you? You love being slapped by me, you like being dominated by me, you like being filled by me don’t you?” Tommy whispered aggressively in my ear as he slipped his cock inside my tight hole.

My mouth fell open in pleasure, my eyes rolled towards the back of my head as he stretched me wide. “Answer me” He demanded once more.

“Yes oh god yes” I moaned loudly as he filled me up completely leaving no room for anything.

“Yeah? Once you deliver this baby Stace. I’m going to fill you with another, and then another and another… You hear me?” He growled into my ear. His hand came up to my neck gently gripping it with his large hand as he pulled me back towards him. “That’s what you want, isn’t it? You want to please me.”

“Fuck yes Tommy” I cried as he started moving his long, thick cock inside me. My back was bent at an uncomfortable angle, my baby bump rested against the dressing table as Tommy started picking up the pace.

“Ahh fuck” I cried one hand coming up to his around my neck, the other leaning against the mirror of my dressing table to support me as he fucked me hard.

“Open your eyes, look at yourself in the mirror. Be a good girl.” Tommy demanded. Wanting nothing more than to please him, I opened my eyes, watching him have his way with me through the reflection in the mirror. There was something so erotic about it I felt myself wanting to do this more. “That's it, good girl. Good girl.”

“Oh fuck Tommy, Tommy.” I whimpered, my mouth hanging open from pleasure when his hand that was caressing my bump disappeared to my clit, rubbing harsh circles. “Oh, oh oh…”

“You're close, my good girl, aren’t you?” Tommy smirked rubbing and fucking me faster. This angle was perfect, he had me exactly where he wanted me, hitting all the right spots and although it was slightly uncomfortable on my back, it felt so good between my legs.

“Yes Tommy” I nodded feeling that balloon expanding in my stomach.

“You want to cum, you wait until I tell you to. Be a good girl.” He spoke with such authority I was ready to pop with just his words. “Be my good girl,” Tommy whispered biting on my ear.

I had to focus all my attention on not cumming as he pounded into me from behind. “Tommy please, I can’t, I can’t…”

“Cum for me baby girl.” He spoke and the second, I mean the second I had his permission I felt myself explode around him, crying out loudly as I felt him shoot his load inside of me, grunting in my ear as he came.

Oh my god,” I whispered as he started to ride out both our highs.

“Perfect darling.” Tommy grinned kissing my cheek, looking into my eyes through the mirror. “I love you, Stace.”

“I love you too Tommy” I whispered

*******

“Finally” John smirked as Tommy entered the snug in the Garrison, pulling me in behind him. We were late to Michael's birthday after our impromptu make-up sex. But I didn’t care. I never felt closer to Tommy than I didn’t in that this evening in our bedroom.

“Bit of business to attend to John,” Tommy smirked as his younger brother slapped his shoulder. I blushed deeply slipping into the seat John got up from sitting next to Esme, smiling softly. “But I see we weren’t missed, you started without us.”

“You two made up then?” Esme smirked, pointing to the mark Tommy had left on my neck. Instantly my hand came up to touch the mark, I had tried to hide it with makeup but it wasn’t dark enough to hide the darkening bite.

“We did.” I blushed with a nod of my head. Glancing over at Tommy, he winked in my direction as Arthur handed him a drink.

“Well Michael, it’s time we officially bring you into the family,” Tommy tells him, handing him his gift. His very own pocket watch and chain, engraved with the Shelby name on the back. “Happy Birthday Michael.” Raising his glass of whiskey into the air, staring directly into Michael's eyes with his intense look.

“Happy Birthday Michael” Everyone announced raising a glass to the newest member of the Shelby family.

Taglist

@shelbyteller @seleneshelby @forgottenpeakywriter @babayaga67 @sweetmilkshakeluminary @slutforcoffein @sydneyyyya @happysparklingshadows @margew76   @midnightmagpiemama  @pierre-gasssllyy  @duckybird101 @muhahaha303 @thenattitude @dolllol2405

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