#apparently this is the best book of 2022 for a ton of my friends I can’t wait to read it ☺️

[oatmilkenjoyer69]

MY LOAN OF TOMORROW, AND TOMORROW, AND TOMORROW IS FINALLY AVAILABLE

[dvar-trek]

January Romance

hello friends i have not slowed down, and perhaps i have maybe even sped up. in the. shotgunning queer romance novels department.

i am mostly on a hockey kick lately. i know nothing about hockey. i have probably watched a grand total of 5 minutes of hockey in my life. i do not care about any sports at all. but i figured that if i can get invested in a sports movie without caring about the sports part (such as Hoosiers (1986) or A League of Their Own (1992)), i could get invested in a sports romance novel without caring about the sports part. and i was correct. thank fuck, bc i think i've read all of the historical romances that there are.

nothing i read this month was like. perfect. it's very hard to measure up to my KJ Charles faves. but there was still some good shit!

the best of:

Hockey Ever After Series (Winging It, Scoring Position, and Unrivaled by Ashlyn Kane and Morgan James- each book follows a different couple. the characters are so good and well fleshed-out, the team dynamics are fun, the plots are engaging, and the sex is hot. you really don't have to know anything about hockey (especially if you start with the 2022 edition of Winging It, which is definitely, definitely the correct choice), but also apparently their hockey shit is pretty accurate, which i always appreciate. overall, the complete package.

the rest of:

loved | liked | okay | didn't like

historical

 ●Undressing the Duke by Erica Ridley (a duke falls in love with his valet who is also his best friend. couldn't finish it. i know KJ Charles has me spoiled for historical accuracy, but i yelled 'WHAT!!!' so many times at so many things that i finally gave up. also it's just not very good in any of the other respects.)  ●The Campion Square series by Adella J Harris (three romances taking place in the same little neighborhood. the series is essentially just sweet and sedate and wholesome, and there is nothing wrong with it, but it did not make me feel a single emotion. the definition of 'okay'.)     ○Mr. Wilkins and the Lodger     ○Mr. Montague and the Pineapple     ○Mr. Jenkins and the Necklace  ●Best Laid Plaids by Ella Stainton (simply not that good, and not even in a fun way.)  ●Mr Warren's Profession by Sebastian Nothwell (clueless son of a wealthy baronet falls for an impoverished clerk. it's nothing special and requires so very much suspension of disbelief that it stops being fun.)  ●One Night in Hartswood by Emma Denny (it has its problems and isn't going to make the faves list, but is basically a lovely and heartfelt romance. two men who don't know each other's identities travel together through the winter. requires a normal-mid amount of suspension of disbelief.)

hockey

 ●Him series by Sarina Bowen and Elle Kennedy (guy falls in love with his straight best friend in high school and cuts him out of his life. they reconnect 4 years later for one last summer together. i loved 90% of the first book, but did not love the direction the authors take things. this series is a genre-wide favorite for tons of people though.)     ○Him     ○Us     ○Epic (novella)  ●On The Brink by Kate Willoughby (there's nothing fun wrong with it. it's just not good.)  ●Puckboys by Eden Finley and Saxon James (these are fine for what they are--just enough plot for hockey boys to have a lot of sex and fall in love, in that order. there are a ton more of these but i had no desire to keep going.)     ○Egotistical Puckboy     ○Irresponsible Puckboy  ●Light Up the Lamp by Kit Oliver (i cried my fucking eyes out. and then i listened to a bunch of songs that i knew would make it hit harder and i cried some more. the writing is... not that bad but also not that good. the premise destroyed me. childhood best friends who fall in love and then life takes them in different directions and they fuck it up so stupidly because they are nineteen years old. and then they go through life with this. chasm. where the love used to be. and then 15 years later they are forced to work together and they decide they will simply never speak of it even though they never resolved any of their shit and it is breaking them open. if you read this book you are contractually obligated to talk to me about it thanks!)     ○Biscuit in the Basket (epilogue novella)

other

 ●Hard Feelings by Ashlyn Kane and Morgan James (artist/graphic designer and software developer who can't stand each other are forced to work together, and they have a lot of hate sex about it. i do not think the authors know anything about design or coding. several parts of this book are cringe. it still had its moments that made my fucking chest hurt. possibly worth it just for that.)  ●The Rock Star's Guide to Getting Your Man by Ashlyn Kane (another one where a guy is in love with his straight childhood best friend. he goes back to his hometown 15 years later to hide from drama with his bandmates, and finds his former best friend still lives there. this one also made me cry, but mostly the dead dad parts. a little bit cheesy and awkward. some funny moments, and not, like, heavy, but also not exactly lighthearted. i appreciated the fact that most of the conflict was with the band and not with the love interest.)  ●The Inside Edge by Ashlyn Kane (tv cohosts who annoy each other and bicker on-screen -> casual sex -> fake dating -> real dating. just a delightful little bonbon of a romance. does go zero-to-i-love-you, which is a pet peeve, but you can't have everything in life.)  ●All the Right Notes by Dominic Lim (composer's dad asks him to come home and put on a charity performance, and to convince a former classmate, now a famous movie star, to perform in it. nice amount of focus on the asian family dynamics without being too heavy-handed. engaging story, and sweet, but clunky. it's a debut novel though, so i'm looking forward to seeing what else this author will put out in the future.)  ●Winter Ball by Amy Lane (i don't even know what to say about this book. i think it is from an alternate universe. the story and the dialogue both feel weirdly out of time, and the author uses phrases in the sex scenes that probably have never have never even been thought by another human. anyway it's about two best friends who discover their sexualities together, and decide to build a life together in spite of familial and societal disapproval.)  ●Iris Kelly Doesn't Date by Ashley Herring Blake (the third book in a series that unfortunately peaked at book 1. all of the things that were awkward about the first book have only become more pronounced as the series progresses. i gave this the old college try, but could not finish it.)  ●Date Me, Bryson Keller by Kevin van Whye (YA book wherein a popular boy agrees to pretend to date his gay classmate for a week. it is. not well-written, but it is basically a sweet story.)  ●The Best Men by Sarina Bowen and Lauren Blakely (this one just felt aggressively like a book by straight women for straight women. also they didn't do the anal research. also also they didn't research the jobs they gave their main characters.)  ●Top Secret by Elle Kennedy and Sarina Bowen (what if you were a straight guy in college and you were anonymously sexting another guy to set up the threesome your girlfriend requested. and then it turned out you were really into him. and then it also turned out he was the guy in your frat house that you hate. would that be fucked up hot or what. i will not lie to you, this book is kind of cringe. like one of the main characters insists approximately 500 times that he's only sexually experimenting because he's a scientist and it's scientific. but it's still fun and i still enjoyed it. there's also a bonus epilogue available.)  ●Heels Over Head by Elyse Springer (incredibly repressed olympic diver falls for his new teammate. full of heartache and shitty families and tenderness and choosing joy.)

[zianramn]

𝐙𝐈𝐀𝐍 𝐊𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐌 𝐑𝐀𝐌𝐍𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐇-𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐒𝐓 — ​🇷​​🇦​​🇾​​🇲​​🇴​​🇳​​🇩​ ​🇦​​🇧​​🇱​​🇦​​🇨​​🇰

THIRTY-SIX YEARS OLD; CIS MAN ; ENGLISH & CREATIVE WRITING PROFESSOR AT UNCW; has lived in MIDTOWN since april 2022

"The sky set to burst, the gold and the rust, the colour erupts, you fillin' my cup. The sun comin' up like I lived my whole life before the first light;"

name's pronounced zee-ahn; last sibling to join the Hearst empire although, he would rather eat his own foot to ever be involved in the family business; born and raised basking in the old money ways, zian didn't really have that much attention from either parent growing up. when his mother remarried, his step-father was actually the one to give him love and attention. the pressure of being a hearst and the treatment from his step-siblings caused zian to start a long-term relationship with drugs, especially cocaine and crushed vicodin pills. he spent a lot of his summers in wilmington when younger, because his step-dad had a summer home by the beach. yale alumni zian took a job as an english & creative writing professor in uncw two years ago. although he’s always considered himself a functional addict, a bad break-up had him spiraling down and eventually having an overdose a few months ago, which was really a wake-up call to him, so he’s been trying to get himself cleaned. he’s a romantic soul who will speak poetically when in love and in awe. henley shirts and jeans are his usual attire alongside his camera; often has a book in his hands, too, and will definitely stop you to pet your dog.

information —

triggers for — mentions of drugs & drug usage

Zian was born with a silver spoon in his mouth. Not only was their father rich, but their mother also came from old Connecticut money, which meant that anything the young boy wanted, they could have it. However, while the Ramnauth residence had tons of money to spare, it also lacked love and affection. Their father traveled a lot and their mother was often too enthralled in high society parties to pay attention to her own child, and so, Zian was raised by nannies, by piano tutors, violin professors and by the help around the house. As a child, he craved for the attention only parents could give, and only parents could also deny, and so, Zian would often find refuge in old sculptures in museums, in beautiful paintings and in books, often capturing the world through pictures which would allow the young Ramnauth to tell a story only they could know.

When he was fifteen, Zian’s mother divorced his father, which, did nothing much to his life as he barely saw the man to begin with. However, it apparently caused his mother Nandini to seek for the young teenager’s attention, thus making him often confuse her neediness for affection. And just like that, the woman transformed someone who had spent their first fifteen years of their life being neglected, into someone who would do anything and everything for their mother, after all, it was them against the world; or so she said.

By the time Zian had finished high school, his mother had already found a new lover to call her own, a man by the name of Oscar Hearst, who came with three other children and a billion dollar empire to be fought over once he bit the dust. One, Zian couldn't care less about because he already was, as a matter of fact, filthy rich, thanks to his maternal grandparents.

To Zian, that union meant little to nothing. He had already been accepted to study English Literature in Yale earlier that year, so he didn't need the Hearst name to make exceptions for him, he already had picked a career, so he didn't need to battle for the Hearst Co. empire... he already had a father, though a distant one, so he didn't crave for one in Oscar. The only good thing it gave him, was the chance to make him come down to Wilmington during his summer vacations and it allowed him to meet his best friend Julian while there. To Oscar Hearst, however, it meant he’d gotten the son he’d always dreamed of having: nice, polite, responsible and dedicated. It meant he could dote on someone without being shut down, that he could take someone to ball games, spend afternoons chatting over a glass of Brandy, and to take on New York by its horns and steer the fate of his company.

The biggest question about this union, however, remained about his step-siblings. Zian didn’t know whether they were annoyed about sharing their father’s love with the younger man, or, sharing his empire with a whole new family, although, Zian had always made it known that he had not interest in getting in the family business. And yet, he still went on and graduated with a Business minor because his mother had asked him to. Yet, he still started working for Hearst Co. in his early years with an entry job because his step-father asked him to, but God, he hated it.

He started spiralling down and developing a close relationship with illicit drugs in order to escape the hell he kept constantly being dragged to, by the people his mother had brought into his life without any sense of consideration for his boundaries. The more time he spent around his step-siblings family, the more miserable he felt. His spark suddenly being diminished by the companies he would keep, his brightness considered weakness. His love for photography was laughed on, his smart and diplomatic ideas were ignored, so, he stopped trying to please the part of his family who dispised him and started working towards giving himself a taste of happiness.

After spending some time enjoying endless nights hopping from gallery soirees, to parties, and eventually landing in strangers beds in New York City, Zian became attached to the boost of energy certain white powders would give him, despite also knowing that should anything like that reach his step-father’s ears, he would be done for. But, Zian was living for the thrill.

Three years ago, Zian accepted a position at the University of North Carolina, teaching English in the Corporate Communications, Public Relations programs and Creative Writing, too, which, is what actually makes him happy nowadays: the academic life. It’s not as glamorous as being in the line of succession of Hearst Co., but considering how he knows his step-siblings would rather see him dead than in charge of their father’s empire, Zian is more than happy to not be going toe to toe with these people and just living the simple life away from the New York chaos.

Wilmington had always been a place that, ever since getting into the Hearst family, he’d always visited, because Oscar had houses near the beach. And so, one could say that Wilmington was the closest thing he’d ever had for a home, so, it almost felt like coming home again when he decided to take the job at the UNCW.

[absolutebl]

HAPPY 2022!

Here’s My 10 Most Anticipated 2022 Thai BLs 

Between Us - delayed from 2020, adaptation of spin off novel (Hemp Rope; source The Red Thread --> Until We Meet Again), from Studio Wabi Sabi featuring one of their most popular (and commercially viable) pairs, this has plenty of funding and distribution (WeTV) with established (if inconsistent) BL director New (who did UWMA). Hemp Rope tells WinTeam’s romance from the start, so we might get some recon reboot action (like LBC2). I expect this to be slightly higher heat than what we get from GMMTV. 

Enchanté - delayed from 2021. Secret admirer romance with a touch of Cyrano de Bergerac and dose of Boys Over Flowers from GMMTV. Completed filming and will air in first quarter 2022, stars Book (Friend Forever) opposite new face, with side dishes Fluke Gawin (Mork in Dark Blue Kiss) and Fluke Pusit (Way in The Shipper). Theo returns from France and starts a written flirtation inside a library book (!) at his new uni with the mysterious Enchante. His best friend Ak hunts for Enchante’s real identity, and 4 senior boys step forward - all intersted in dating Theo. Ak might also be in the running. New framework for Thai BL (although not for yaoi) and I’m intrigued. 

Dear Doctor - adapted from a y-novel by HUNGRYBIRD Dear Doctor, I'm Coming For Soul. Wabi Sabi picked up this defunked project and is apparently bringing it back for iQIYI starring Grey Rainbow couple Nut & Karn who are great together and certainly mature and capable leads. A romance between a doctor trying to save his patients and the Grim Reaper, who is both his enemy and lover. It looks like there is also a side couple at the hospital. The gay Doom at Your Service? I LOVE THIS PREMISE!!! 

Vise Versa - GMMTV’s adaptation of a JittiRain y-novel (2gether author), alt reality, bodyswap, soulmates AKA fated mates. Stars Jimmy (Wai from Bad Buddy) + a fresh face. Looks very good, a timeslip alt reality sort of thing. I’m super pleased to see Jimmy get a lead. Also I think one of the characters might be butch (intentionally or not). Which would be a first for GMMTV. 

KinnPorsche - delayed from 2021, book adaptation, mafia/bodyguard romance, lots of production issues (which is why it’s not higher on this list). The titular characters are played by actors new to BL - intentionally; sides include Jeff (of Ingredients) , Tong (TharnType & Second Chance), and Perth (My Engineer). It’s a BIG cast. Mafia kid, Kinn, is assaulted and flees into the arms of student Porsche. Porsche helps Kinn escape and Kinn blackmails him into becoming his bodyguard. Likely to be higher heat. 

The Eclipse - GMMTV bringing us tons of tropes: sinister boarding school, haze the one you love, good boy/bad boy, suspense & horror elements, self acceptance themes, a curse, AND enemies to lovers. Stars First from The Shipper and Khaotung from Tonhon Chonlatee, side dish pairing from FUTS NeoLouis, and Pawin from My Gear and Your Gown. To me this looks like Blacklist meets Great Men Academy but doomy. I really like this pairing and I think they can handle the content. 

Cutie Pie - arranged marriage, age gap, secret identity, cohabitation, rich kid problems, plus he’s in engineering. Stars Zee (Why R U?) as the seme and the uke actor is unknown but looks good, also has MaxNat (Why R U? & Y-Destiny & Close Friend). The sons of two companies are engaged to each other. One doesn’t want an arranged marriage while the other wants to win him over. I happen to adore an arranged marriage trope and I’ve yet to see it in gay romance let alone BL, so I’m intrigued. 

Never Let Me Go - mafia, attack dog (whipping boy + bodyguard), love triangle, obsession, suspense from GMMTV with Jojo of 3 Will Be Free directing, so we know the action parts should be good. I think this is GMMTV’s answer to KinnPorsche but it looks a lot more like Golden Blood. Either way I love a bodyguard romance and PondPhuwin (leads in Fish Upon the Sky) are a good pair I’d like to see get a better series. Also has Aun (Folk from My Gear) and Chimon (My Dear Loser). Feels a little classic yaoi with almost Japanese elements and I’m delighted by the cast. 

Coffee Melody - Cafe set BL starring Pavel (my love) as a barista (2moons2) and Benz as a singer (Call it What You Want) and they look good together but I am worried about the support cast and the plot. Still, it’s Pavel! 

My Only 12% - Studio Wabi Sabi’s y-novel adaptation (author Afterday who also wrote the novel behind Bad Buddy) starring SantaEarth (7 Project) The plot looks a little dull and sad which is why this is at the bottom of this list, but I ADORE Santa & Earth’s chemistry on screen and Wabi Sabi has knocked worse than this out of the park, so fingers crossed 

I don’t necessarily think these are going to be the ones I like the most but these are the ones, from Thailand, that I think are going to be the most interesting (or are staring some of my favorite actors, and I’m just happy to see them back). 

Which ones are you most excited about? 

(source)

[callunavulgari]

Year-In-Life | 2020

Or that annual New Year’s meme where I talk about what the year was like to live through. And since this is 2020 the read through below features: a whole lot of depression, frank discussion about losing my cat, and pictures of my face.

1. What did you do in 2020 that you’d never done before? Lost my best friend. I lost a hamster when I was about ten, but other than that, I’ve never lost a pet before. Losing Mal was the worst thing about an already awful year. I have lost family members that I have mourned less than her. I am still fucked up about losing her, and probably will be for a long while yet. 

Things that I haven’t done before - 2020 edition - consists of extreme depression, global pandemics, wearing a mask if I’m not either at home or in my car, having covid, being in the ER twice in one year, cutting all carbs and losing sixty pounds, spending a weekend in Vegas (in January, obvs), gambling (and winning over a thousand dollars), and probably a lot of other things that I’ve blocked out. But it’s always going to be the year that I lost Mal.

2. Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year? Apparently, according to 2019 me, my resolutions were to lose weight and quit smoking. Which, strangely enough, I actually did. Who knew that going to the ER for heart issues at the age of 30 would scare me into switching some things up.So, yay! I kept my resolutions.

Resolutions for 2021 - lose the rest of the weight. End goal is only another 50 pounds away. Write something original if you can, but don’t stress if you can’t. Heal. Be happier. Breathe deep. Don’t do something you’ll regret.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth? One of my coworkers had a kid earlier in the year, but nothing since.

4. Did anyone close to you die? Mal. 

5. What countries did you visit? Alternatively, what is your favorite place that you did go this year? No countries this year, because that is illegal. I did go to Las Vegas in January though, before the year turned into an absolute shitstorm. It was actually really wonderful, which I wouldn’t have expected out of Vegas. We watched our friends get married on the High Roller. Ate a lot of very good, but very expensive food. Gambled a bit and actually won money. Saw two Cirque du Soleil shows - the Beatles and water one. Saw the Bellagio fountains and maybe cried a little about it. It was really nice.

6. What would you like to have in 2021 that you lacked in 2020? Well, I didn’t get a ring and we didn’t get a house, but we also made the decision to not do that this year. We did however, get a better president, so that was nice. In 2021, I would like a little more serotonin and a little less anxiety. And I’m not gonna say a damn thing about a ring.

7. What date from 2020 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? September 20th, 2020. Any other dates don’t fucking matter. 8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? I lost a ton of weight and quit smoking, hopefully for the last time. Covid didn’t kill me. I didn’t kill me. I know that sounds bad, but it was a really, really horrible year.

9. What was your biggest failure? I don’t know. Not being able to save her? Not knowing that the heart abnormality had gotten that bad? Not getting her on clot busters the minute we took care of the thyroid problem.  10. Did you suffer illness or injury? I had Covid near the end of October and had regular illnesses a couple times throughout the year. I went to the ER in May for heart-related problems. And I’ve had debilitating headaches every single day since Covid, so. Yes. 11. What was the best thing you bought? We rescued a new kitten approximately four days after we lost Mal. It was too soon, I think, and if I could have done it again, I may have waited longer. But BMO was incredibly depressed after she passed and had basically stopped eating, so we were desperate. But I can’t regret getting her. She’s been the little bit of sunshine we’ve had since October.  12. Whose behavior merited celebration? I don’t know. Everyone and everything sucked this year. 13. Whose behaviour made you appalled and depressed? I don’t know, mine? I’ve come a long way this year in terms of weight loss and smoking and holding it together, but I’ve also sunken into the deepest hole that I’ve possibly ever been in since September. I will always be deeply frustrated by Nick’s mother and my mother, so that’s not really new. Everything sucked. Hopefully 2021 is better.

14. Where did most of your money go? Bullshit medical stuff. Turns out that two ER trips, countless doctor visits, and dental fuckery is really expensive. I did also go slightly crazy and bought Nick too many gifts this year, but in the grand scheme of things, it wasn’t bad. Also planning on buying a relatively pricey comforter as soon as I’ve confirmed that I haven’t gotten it for Christmas. 15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? I am going to be completely and totally serious when I say that I don’t think I’ve experienced true excitement since about February. I did get a very intense, brief spike of serotonin when I saw the new Dragon Age and Mass Effect trailers. But like. I don’t know. That’s kind of it. 

Okay, no, that’s a lie. I was happy to lose the weight I did and was super proud of myself and my health was phenomenal, but then Mal happened and covid happened and it’s hard to see the good things that happened this year when I feel this fucking horrible right now.

16. What song will always remind you of 2020? Toss a Coin to Your Witcher (because yeah, that was this year, fuck). Teeth. Don’t Get Me Wrong. The Untamed theme. Well, the entire Untamed soundtrack. Dance Monkey. We Won’t Be Falling. Promare soundtrack. Own Me. Into the Unknown. Monster. Waving Through a Window. Eurovision soundtrack. 17. Compared to this time last year, are you: i. happier or sadder? So much more depressed. Which says a lot, because 2019 was not super great. ii. thinner or fatter? But hey, on the plus side my answer to this question is finally thinner. iii. richer or poorer? Probably around the same. Or maybe poorer? I had a lot in my savings last year that I had to dip into because of medical shit. 18. What do you wish you’d done more of? I wish I’d done... anything. I wish I was allowed to leave my house without worrying about infecting myself or others. I wish that I had gone to the park more. I wish that I’d travelled. I wish that I’d written more. I wish I’d cooked more. I wish I’d worked out. Spent more time with my cat.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of? God, I fucking wish I’d spent less time in my apartment.

20. How will you be spending Christmas? I don’t know. Nick’s family wants to have a big gathering since his grandpa might not be around next year? But the idea of that makes me super flinchey, for obvious reasons. I mean, I’m reasonably sure that the antibodies are still in our system, so we have a smaller chance of infection, but fuck. Also, large gatherings have been giving me anxiety, also for obvious reasons. 21. How will you be spending New Year’s Eve? I hope that we’re staying home. I want to make pirozki and spend the transition into the new year on my couch, maybe playing a video game, maybe napping. 22. Did you fall in love in 2020? Still love him. He got me through this year. I don’t think I could have done it alone. 23. Best month for you this year? January through March was not horrible. I can’t remember a definitive good month of the three, but January was Vegas, which was really good, so lets go with that.

24. What was your favorite TV program? Of just 2020? The Untamed (live action and anime), The Magicians, Guardian, various Watcher Entertainment segments, She-Ra (season 5!!!), The Haunting of Bly Manor, Over the Garden Wall, Leverage, Motherland: Fort Salem...

My favorite being The Untamed, hands down. Obviously.

25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? I don’t think I have enough energy for hate at this point. I’m just tired.

26. What was the best book you read? Favorite was probably a tie between Gideon the Ninth and Harrow the Ninth, which works out well since they’re part of the same series. I really, really loved this series and am kind of sad that I have to wait until 2022 to get the third part of the trilogy. Top ten below, because why not.

Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir

Harrow the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir

Into the Drowning Deep by Mira Grant

The Lost Future of Pepperharrow by Natasha Pulley

Something to Talk About by Meryl Wilsner

The Invisible Life of Addie Larue by V.E. Schwab

Return of the Thief by Megan Whalen Turner

Written in the Stars by Alexandria Bellefleur

The Last Sun (and it’s sequel) by K.D. Edwards

The City We Became by N.K. Jemisin

27. What was your greatest musical discovery? Toss a Coin to Your Witcher has singlehandedly escorted me through 2020. Basically all the songs listed a couple questions up were my favorites of the year, but the Untamed soundtrack was probably my favorite. Promare soundtrack was also bomb af.

28. What did you want and got? Nick’s mom bought us nice bookshelves when we moved into the new place.

29. What did you want but didn’t get? A lot of things. Namely, I wish Mal was still with me.

30. What was your favorite film of this year? Promare, 100% Most of the other movies I watched were all rewatches. I watched My Neighbor Totoro, Onward, Knives Out, Emma, and that Eurovision movie. They were all pretty swell.

31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I wrapped presents on the living room floor and watched Last Christmas, which I thought was just a rom-com Christmas movie but surprised the hell out of me at the reveal that her love interest was dead the whole time? Like? That came out of left field. We then had a very quiet lunch at the Lantern, the Chinese place we go every year, and ducked into Oakland Nursery and Barnes and Noble long enough to grab some plants and books. I also got to see the Easton Christmas tree from across the street. It was snowing and honestly, a really pretty day. Oh, also I had to go to the dentist. That was less fun.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? If I’d been able to keep Mal. 33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2020? I wore a lot of comfortable work appropriate clothes and pajamas. My clothes don’t really fit me anymore since I lost all the weight, but I refuse to buy more until I’m actually at my goal weight. 34. What kept you sane? Nick was very helpful every time I had an anxiety attack and/or broke down crying. It could have been a lot worse, probably, but I literally cannot wrap my mind around that right now. 35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Every single actor in the Untamed live action is unfairly gorgeous, especially Wang Yibo and Xiao Zhan. Also, Henry Cavill was a shockingly good casting for Geralt and needs to be grimey all the time because he is a LOT more attractive when it looks like he hasn’t showered in three weeks. 36. What political issue stirred you the most? FUCK DONALD TRUMP IN THE EAR 20156789 2020—– This has literally been my response since 2015. Here’s to hoping that it won’t be my response in 2021. Also, children in concentration camps? Lying to the public about the pandemic? The race riots that happened earlier in the year? Literally everything else? This year has been fucking awful. 37. Who did you miss? Mal. Myself when I’m not feeling like this. 38. Who was the best new person you met? Annie. New coworker, delightful lady. If the pandemic was not a thing I definitely would have already gotten drinks with her after work.

39. Talk about a new friend that you made this year: Uh. Annie is a delightful person and brought me and Nick food when we were wasting away with covid. She also gave us toilet paper when we ran out after all the assholes in the entire country bought all the toilet paper in March/April. 

40. Post a picture from the beginning of the year:

This is me in like... February? I think? In public. Without a mask. I have lots of pictures of me in January, but all of them have someone else with me.

41. Post a picture from the end of the year:

Taken on my birthday, snatched just outside the doors of Barnes & Noble with the Easton tree across the street. Note the mask dangling from my ear.

42. A memorable meal discovered this year? Okay, so like. Two things. One- I had a meal in Vegas, that was fucking amazing. Actually I had a couple of those. Let me see if I can find pictures. Okay, so below are the two best meals I have eaten this year. The top is a butternut squash and pistachio ravioli, which came with this sweet butter sauce and it was so. fucking. good. Like, I have craved this thing since January. The bottom is the beef wellington at Gordon Ramsey’s Hell’s Kitchen. Which was... overpriced, but admittedly still delicious. I could have lived off that damn ravioli though.

43. What was your favorite memory this year? My birthday was actually pretty okay, all things considered. The snow was magical and I felt solidly okay for most of the day. Other than that, all of the nights in Vegas were great.

44. What are you excited for next year? So, the message to me from 2019 me for this question is about how I was really sad on December 26th of 2019 and that I hoped that 2020 would be the year that we “seized life by the horns or whatever” and like. Baby. 2019 me. I realize your depression was valid, but holy fuck, my sweet summer child it got so much worse. Though, I guess technically I did seize life by the horns for a bit. And then September hit like a bag of bricks.

Anyway, I am cautiously optimistic and hopeful that the transition of power to Biden goes smoothly. I’m hoping that things get better and not worse. I’m excited for several books, movies, and games, but mostly, I’m hoping that things are better. 

45. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2020: My message from last year was this:

“I feel like my message from last year is fucking taunting me. Legit though, this is not the worst thing you’ve ever been through. You have a boyfriend who loves you, two wonderful cats that better not fucking die anytime soon, and like, I don’t know, working ovaries. A job. A car. An apartment that has a kind of shitty kitchen and a bath tub that might as well not exist, but is still an apartment! Which is more than some people have!”

Thanks 2019 Heather. It got worse. (Though admittedly, and knock on fucking wood, but 2019 me is right. It could technically still get worse. But I have hope that it won’t.)

My valuable life lesson in the year of 2020: Life sucks. Keep your head on straight. Mourn your dead and love your living like you’ll never see them again. Live life like you could die tomorrow. And don’t take the little things for granted. 46. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year: I am going to make it through this year If it kills me - This Year, The Mountain Goats

(2018 me apparently quoted Singing in the Rain. 2019 quoted something sad and pretentious. 2020 me is just tired and clinging to life by my damn fingernails.)

First Fandom of 2020: January of 2020 seems to have been solidly The Magicians, The Witcher, and The Untamed. Favorite Main Character of 2020: Wei Wuxian, fuck. Favorite Villain of 2020: Wei Wuxian, fuck. Close second if that doesn’t apply - Xue Yang. Favorite M/F Couple of 2020: Does Parker/Elliot/Hardison count? Because them, holy fuck. Also, female!Byleth/Jeritza. Favorite F/F Couple of 2020: Catra and Adora!!!!! Ahhhhh!!!! Er. Also, Harrow/Gideon.  Favorite M/M Couple of 2020: Wei Wuxian/Lan Wangji. Close second is probably Ryan/Shane. Fandom That You Never Expected To Get Into: Honestly, probably the Untamed. I’m not usually crazy about live actions, but fuck, it was good. Fandom That Made An Unexpected Comeback: Buzzfeed Unsolved/Watcher. Also, in the last month I have been all over Mark/Damien(/Sam) from the Bright Sessions because I just listed to Neon Darkness. Fandom That Inspired The Most Crack: Yeah, idk. There’s crack in every fandom. Last Fandom of 2020: Buzzfeed Unsolved. And honestly, I’m still not out of The Untamed.  Favorite Fandom of 2020: Definitely the Untamed. Dipping into the Witcher was also nice.

[bookloveravenue]

Brooklyn Bruisers (book 9): Shenanigans by Sarina Bowen

What I meant to do in Vegas: Let my hair down for once and celebrate winning a medal at my first women’s hockey all-stars competition.

What I actually did: Got senior prom drunk and woke up married to Brooklyn’s star winger, the great Neil Drake.

He’s the heir to a billion dollars, and I barely survived my childhood. Our friendship is based strictly only on hockey, takeout food and smack talk.

And now holy matrimony. Although we both know it can’t last, especially once his evil family gets wind of our Vegas shenanigans…

Contains: Meddling teammates, meddling parents, ugly jewelry and a pretend-kiss that nearly sets the world on fire.

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/59737076-shenanigans

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March 2, 2022

My Review: 5/5 Stars

Shenanigans is such an excellent title for this story because when it comes to Neil and Charli and all their friends there are plenty shenanigans going on! Loved Neil and Charli's story! I was so excited for them to get a book after meeting them in the previous book of this series. The story kicks off in a pretty memorable way or for Neil and Charli, there are some things they don't quite remember. They wake up next to one another in a bed in Vegas, hungover as hell and stumble upon some pretty interesting papers. Specifically marriage papers where they apparently got married the night before. As they nurse a hangover and rush out the door to catch a plane and not miss either of their hockey practices, they are a little late to realize that leaving wasn't the best idea if you are looking for a divorce. Apparently getting married drunk is super easy but getting a sober divorce is not. As the two of them figure out their plan of action and their feelings for one another things get complicated. Like how Neil has always had a thing for Charli and explaining how he feels about her may not come out right after drunk marrying her. And for Charli, she always keeps her distance because trusting others is super hard and Neil tempts her in ways that no one ever has. Plus Charli believes they come from totally two different worlds. Neil and his family are super rich while she barely has money to her name. That and the fact that her family is the worst lot. Though Neil's isn't any better in some ways. And when Neil proposes for them to stay married long enough for him to make a move against his uncle in their company, well Charli finds herself agreeing to help. How can she not get behind Neil when his ideas will help so many others? It also doesn't help when he promises to cook her some amazing steak dinners in exchange for every family encounter.

This book is just a ton of fun. Neil and Charli have wonderful chemistry and despite their differences are really great together. How can anyone not love the sweetheart that is Neil Drake III? And it will take everything he has to prove to Charli that he is crazy about her and that she can open her heart to him and trust him to have her back no matter comes their way. Just another wonderful addition to this series and I can't wait to find out who's book is next!

I received an ARC in exchange for an honest review.