#anyways you dont know how much i miss this dynamic

[attackoneyebrows]

1x06, otherwise known as my fav ep of season 1

[satorugojoswiife]

What do you think about gojo ships

I feel like I'm pretty indifferent to most of them. This is super cringe of me, but whenever I fall super in love with a character I don't often like shipping them romantically with anyone. 💀 (im delusional I know)

It doesn't help that for some reason the jjk fandom (especially twt) is weirdly aggressive about ships. I know it isn't all the shippers and it's mostly just the loud minority, but seeing so much of the discourse has kinda put me off and I don't really engage much with the ships in the fandom except for rarepairs and selfships bc alot of the time those communities are more wholesome and cozy (if that makes sense LOL)

[triglycercule]

give me more horrorkiller content i say as i proceed to post solely about full mtt/mttpoly. i cant I CANT i cant just SOLELY post about one of the duos...... i cant JUST post about 2/3 of them it upsets me. everything MUST be in a trio of else i merge into my bed and rip my skin off when i try to get up

[bobzora]

yeah femc has some really solid romance routes but i just cannot be assed to care too much because there are some crazy level yuri goings on in this game

[perilegs]

i downloaded the multiple romances mod but i still don't know if i want anode to romance both minthara and gale or just minthara (info on anode if you're interested) so!

[evie-sturns]

kiss - Matt Sturniolo

summary: when your best friend matt invites you round for a late night hang out, it ends up in him confessing his feelings to you... leading to you kissing your best friend of 8 years for the first time.

contains: fluff, slight arguing, confession, making out.

---------------------┌── •✧• ──┐-----------------

i've known matt since 8th grade, we met in science class where he spilt acid on my shirt. after that we became lab partners, then friends, then best friends.

9:34pm

"matt!!" i sing, opening the door to his bedroom and walking in. his gaze lifts from his laptop screen to me, his face lights up. he's wearing a black shirt with white detailing and some grey sweatpants, he's sat up against the pile of pillows on his bed.

"i missed you!" matt smiles, patting the spot next to him.

i jump on to his bed next to him and cuddle up to his sides, resting my head on his shoulder.

"how have you been?" matt exclaims, rubbing my shoulder as i instantly start talking,

in our friendship i've always been the talker, matt's a natural listener so it's an easy dynamic for us.

"guess what happened when i was drving here, this bitch flew on to the road on a scooter! i swerved so hard to miss her, and- and she was fully grown on a scooter!?" i scoff,

matt rubs his eyes with a laugh, "jesus christ." matt scoffs.

i look to my side at him, "like if i totalled my car dodging a middle-aged woman on a children's scooter i'd be so pissed." i continue, matt's in tears now, a stupidly wide smile spread across his pink cheeks.

i sigh, "anyways, netflix?" i suggest, reach onto matts lap and yank his laptop further up his torso. "yeah!" matt replies, he scrolls through netflix and picks out some rom-com

"a rom com? you're feeling romantic today," i tease, matt jabs his fingers into my waist, earning a scream from me followed by a loud giggle.

the opening scene to the movie starts, i cuddle closer to matt's side and wrap a leg over his thigh, matt goes tense and i subtly hear his breathing pick up.

"you okay?" i whisper, matt nods.

"matt why don't you talk to me about things, i've known you since we were 12 you can tell me stuff." i sigh,

"im fine- i'm okay." matt insists, his cheeks are flushed now.

"i know but you've been distance recently, and i don't understand what i've done wrong?" i mumble, pausing the movie and pushing the screen down.

"its not you y/n." matt states,

"then what is it!" i argue back,

"oh my fucking god do you not get it?" matt says, i sit up and look down at him, my eyebrows twisted.

"you are so- so gorgeous. everything about you is perfect and i'm sorry, i'm sorry if this ruins things between us but i'm completely obsessed with you, i really really like you and i have for much longer than i'd rather admit. so i'm sorry if i'm being distant but its painful to be around you without the constant need to fucking tell you- how much i need you."

my mouth falls open, i've always thought matt was cute, i've just pushed it away.

matt looks at me, scanning over my face as he breathes deeply, his eyebrows slanted upwards out of nerves.

"you mean it-" before i can finish my sentence matt cuts me off, "yes- i fucking do." he whines, running a hand through his hair as he sits up.

his laptop slides off his lap, i crawl over and sit on his lap while he props himself up on the headboard.

i grab his chin, making him look up at me as i get comfortable straddling him.

"you should've told me baby." i whisper, the pet name makes matt's eyes widen.

"because you've always been cute matt, just my type yeah?"

"dont lie please.." matt shys

i smirk before pressing our lips together, his lips are plush and soft, i've always wondered what they would feel like against mine.

"oh my god." matt breathes against my lips, my heart thumps out of my chest as i place a hand on his shoulder, rocking my hips against the fabric of his sweatpants.

matt glides his tongue over my bottom lip, asking for permission which i quickly grant. his tongue slips inside my mouth, fighting mine for dominance.

his ringed hands lace into my brunette hair, pushing my head further towards his.

his spare hand finds its way to my ass, pushing me against his lap harder, a pathetic whine escapes my mouth, matt chuckles against my lips before pulling away.

"don't get too worked up sweetheart." matt teases, i scoff

"shut up"

i lean back slightly, his face scans over mine "was that okay..?" he asks shyly like he wasn't just pressing me down onto his clothed cock 15 seconds ago.

"that was really.. fucking good." i laugh, laying down on his body and burying my head on his shoulder, i press small kisses on his neck, marking lightly.

"what.. are we?" he asks,

"what do you want to be?" i reply,

"you don't have to say yes- this is random but, do you want to maybe.. will you be my girlfriend." matt asks quietly,

i laugh slightly "you're so stupid matt,"

he goes silent, i give him a proper reply before he starts to panic

"yes, yes matt i will be your girlfriend." i smile,

matt grabs both sides of my face and smashes his lips to mine again, smiling widely against my lips.

--------------

@luanetaluenta @sturnsssbow @mattfangirl @luvr4miya @luvtay111 @lolasturniolo @freshloveforthefit @ruedowney @lovingchrissposts @333michelle @h3arts4harry @sonicmacks @jamiesturniolo @chrisstopherfilmed @itzdarling @sturniolo-simp4life @daddyslilchickenfingers2 @recklessmatt @ev3rgreenxtrees @lovergirl4387 @certifiednatelover @solarsturniolo @mattsenthusiast @yomamaslays4lyfe @peachmels @alinaa131 @pepsiluvr0209 @creamoncreamoncream2 @szobofc @mattscoquette @blahbell668 @sturniolo04 @ecilphttlunar @pkfferoo @bitchydragonparadise @thematthewlover @sturni0l0 @ratatioulle

[qualityrain]

i miss them!! so much!!!

[mahi-wayy]

Bitch dont tell me you haven't done a headcanon for our boy naidu!!

𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍 | 𝑹𝑨𝑵𝑨 𝑵𝑨𝑰𝑫𝑼

• General • Romantic [both. sfw and nsfw]

A/n : seriously how did I miss him-

I - GENERAL

he is everything 😭

that was dramatic because so is everything in his life.

the official babysitter of the elites.

anger issues. he was so prone to violent episodes from his childhood.

became calmer over the time.

you know that one person who you befriend for work and then the person refuses to leave you alone at any cost? that's prince and his dynamic.

he is SO DONE with the amount of bullshit decisions the actor makes in a week nevermind a month or god forbid a year.

him and lara share a clint-natasha type of relationship.

he met her under a job. she was blackmailing the son of a politician under desperation and he ended up helping her out instead of beating her up or something and she stuck by him since then.

she is not in love with him she is gay my dudes but she will break your face if you even breathe wrong in his direction.

sirini is more on the big brother side since he was the one to help him grab the hold of things when he started.

always breaking up petty bickering between sirini and lara.

had nightmares for longest time until he developed insomnia. especially of naga coming out of prison to kill him.

now coming to topic that makes like 80% of his personality. the trauma.

was the 'good. sensible. responsible.' kid growing up.

naga just about always left him to deal with brothers, sister and mother.

developed a practical-problem solving thinking very early in his life.

has bad anxiety, self worth issues and depression.

his anxiety/panic attacks are of the worst kind. he hates them.

had one after he confronted naga in tej's studio that night.

can't sleep most of time so he drinks in hopes of passing out. this worked out well until he built a tolerance for alcohol.

his depressive episodes include him sitting in one place and literally getting stuck in his own mind.

he is obsessed with training in gym and getting better at fighting because he will die before he lets anyone die from his family again or let someone harm them in anyway.

panics when things don't go his way.

when he panics he gets violent.

cheated because he was backed into a corner, not saying it was not wrong, saying he was pretty much angered to do it and isn't the type to cheat.

can't eat a lot at once. he gets sick since he grew up eating less to let his siblings and mother have his share mostly.

crashes at tej's studio more than his other apartment.

that apartment is for when he is going through it can't pretend to be okay infront of everyone anymore.

was unfazed when he killed someone for the first time.

his most brutal kill is him beating a man to death with bare hands.

doesn't even try to see eye to eye with arjun let alone naga.

TRUST ISSUES.

selective mutisim as trauma response.

II - ROMANTIC

won't make the first move because issues.

wouldn't trust the person 'loving' him.

actions over words.

talks less but loves to listen to his partner yapping

expensive gifts.

regular in home dates.

can and does cook for his partner.

when he can he sleeps as the big spoon.

NSFW

definitely a dom.

being soft or rough totally depends on his mood.

loves eating his partner out. can do it for hours on end.

likes tying them up.

loves overestimulating them.

isn't very vocal but does growl and groan.

sensitive neck and thighs.

----

tags : @mayakimayahai @warnermeadowsgirl @vijayasena @voidsteffy @jkdaddy01 @rambheem-is-real @allari-ammayi @mellaga-karagani @ulaganayagi @ahamasmiyodhah

[hiemaldesirae]

AU where *Vox* is the one who disappears for 7 years, and ALL of Hell suffers for it. The remaining 2 Vees end up with their souls contracted to Alastor, Carmilla and Zestial have to become allies and join forces-most overlords do by the time Vox comes back there ARE no solo Overlords left, except technically Rosie and Alastor but even they are 'allies' in the loosest sense. Everyone else is paired up and it all because of the madness of Radio Demon at the disappearance of his muse. He's shacked up inside of The Vees Tower, taking over Vox's floor as his own, adding a radio tower to the side of it.

And then, 7 years after his disappearance, Vox reappears and joins Charlie Morningstar at her hotel for rehabilitation of sinners of all things, with Angel Dust as her first client, and--

The very foundations of Hell shake.

OHHH this one is fun. yesyesyes im so onboard with this one!!! i think about swap aus very fondly no matter how many times i see premises where vox and al get their storylines swapped ill ALWAYS eat it up.

okay so i do have some questions i want to get over with first. did al and vox breakup before the whole. (waves hands) seven year leave thing. like did they fight before he left because that brings a wholly different dynamic to the table rather than 'oh vox just disappeared one day', which in fairness i can see driving alastor crazy in a much different way, but also if they'd fought beforehand and alastor had expected to see vox back with the vees the day after or something, only to find him missing with no one aware of where he was... hoo boy. and also- does alastor take over the entertainment district here? like, he's got val and velvette as contracted souls, so do they stop running the district because they can no longer hold the respect of those they were once under and just do menial tasks under al's servitude, or is there a completely different dynamic here that ive passed over?

anyway with that over with... (bashes my head into the wall) YES I NEED THIS. ohmuy god. the aus where vox is sponsoring the hazbin hotel because of a deal he made with lucifer or something have been haunting my head for weeks upon end and i cant help but imagine something similar here- i can just imagine how pissed alastor would be to learn of the fact that vox was back and didnt even think to go and SHOW HIMSELF to him first??? vox was HIS. his muse, his rival, his stupid, stupid picture box- and he went off to make a deal with that bright-faced, stupid little princess of hell? instead of going back to alastor? no, no, no, that cant do, absolutely not, VALENTINO, you have to get your oblivious little employee under control before i rip out both your throats-- anyway. i imagine al probably hates intearcting with either of the vees but he does to make sure theyre not dead or trying to kill him (its all for voxs sake. he wouldn't be glad to return and find his friends slaughtered, after all.)

sorry i dont really have any other thoughts to addonto this (theres a reason why i havent written/drawn a swap au with them and its because ive no idea how the story would change given all the different nuances that we dont yet know... so. yeah) except maybe that alastor would probably be pissed as hell at the attention vox gets when he returns- because he was a celebrity figure before he was gone, too, and his return is like the equivalent to a comeback on princess diana's revenge dress level. instead of being pissed that other sinners are paying attention to vox in a 'they should be looking at me' kind of way though he's more pissed in a 'no one should look at him except for me' kind of way which really weirds charlie vaggie and angel out who are kinda just going like... 'are you sure about that guy man' and vox just shrugs like 'well last time i was face to face with him we had a really bitter breakup fight so idek if hes sure about me tbh'

[the-s1lly-corner]

May I please have a request of head cannons of TADC crew dealing with a clingy kid reader

Like two of them are basically plushies (Jax and Ragtha)

And please do take your time

TADC cast x clingy!kid!reader (platonic!)

YAHOO!! my back hurts but its okay because i drew my oc looking... (checks notes) "cunty" (doesnt know if theyre using the word right) anyways gonna knock out a few more requests; got that one friendship is witchcraft song playing on loop in my headphones so im typing like a speed demon rn RAAAAAAh

CAINE:

honestly hes probably the same with you, though like. with his eyes; he keeps an eye on you at all times. like i can easily caine being kind of negligent when it comes to kids and letting them get into harms way, but i also adore the idea of him fretting over you and trying to keep you safe. does not mind your clinginess, not one bit. always keeps close in IHAs, in fact we may even be able to joke that hes now a participant in his own games! he does it for both of your comforts, and to make sure you dont get hurt.. in cases where he cant be around, for whatever reason, he promotes bubble to babysitter to keep an eye on you; i think! reads you bedtime stories every night

POMNI:

i think i may have mentioned this a few times but pomni can get a little uncomfortable around kids; kids can be really wild and/or horrifically honest with no filter and pomni does not have the mental strength to cope, digital world or not/lh

with that being said it would take her a while to get used to you gravitating around her; i dont think she would tell you to leave her alone though. i mean, she tries to put herself in your shoes. shes losing her mind in this place and shes brand new and a grown woman. how is this effecting you? so she sticks around and just. embraces it, i think. probably checks in on you when you go to bed... kind of pauses when you ask her to stay, be it because you dont want her to go or because youre scared of monsters under the bed i think she would ultimately stay by your bed in a chair and watch over you

RAGATHA:

good news for hugging her, shes very soft thanks to the fact that shes literally a doll! honestly its rare that she would tell you to step aside so she can do something; plus like caine she generally likes to keep an eye on you to make sure youre not getting into trouble or danger,,, makes you plushies so you hang onto them when shes away and you miss her. like caine she also has a bedtime routine with you. maybe its because i just watched some adventure time today, but the ritual would be similar to sweet p's bedtime ritual (bedtime cheek kisses, tucking in, reassuring that youre loved ect ect ect) idk i just think ragatha would have that kind of energy when caring for a kid reader, clingy or not

holds

JAX:

one of the two characters who might get annoyed by your clinginess, especially in the beginning (oh boy i sure wonder who the other one is (looks at zooble)) and he might try to push you away and shoo you when you try to stick around him. might feel a little bad when he sees the sad look in your eyes when you turn away and walk away. jax, feeling bad for once? now thats rare

might try to bond with you by trying to teach you his ways of trickery; no one wants to see a kid sad, especially in a place like this and i dont think jax would be immune to your pouty face. older brother and little sibling dynamic, i think! i genuinely cannot see jax being fatherly, tbh

KINGER:

DAD KINGER DAD KINGER; do i need to say more? honestly kinger is very clingy himself with the people he cares about, given that hes lost so much he wants to make sure that those he cares about are still safe and sound. if anything, you might be the one asking him to dial it down a notch!/j

lets you snuggle up into him during bedtime stories, i think! like while the others who read to you would be sitting on a chair next to the bed, kinger would be close enough for you to lean into him if that makes sense. generally very sweet to you too, i think!

ZOOBLE:

the other one who would be a little annoyed by how clingy you are, again, especially in the beginning. zooble seems to really value their own personal time and space so its likely that they would try to set up a boundary; so you probably arent going to be able to spend every waking moment with them... that said i dont think they would exactly be... mean to you... like they dont hate you, they just tend to get irritated by small things! makes very clear communication, which is an important thing to learn! teaching moment! also cannot see them picking up a parental role, i can see them being the cool but angsty older sibling tbh. probably kind of freezes up when you hug them but does not push you away. does care deeply for you, just shows it in their own unique way

GANGLE:

oh you probably accidentally drag her around without fully meaning to! i mean im not sure how old the reader is, but lets say theyre on the younger side and they dont fully. mean to just drag gangle across the room. i mean its not like youre dragging her across the floor, at least! plus gangle is just so light, given that shes totally made of ribbon in the digital world. she doesnt really mind all the much, though... even if she did im not sure if she would speak up... lets you come and go into her room whenever, since sometimes you just miss her and she has enough trust in you not to mess with anything + sometimes you guys do arts and crafts together! yipee!

[druidshollow]

I love dune but dune manipulating fire by making him villainize descent makes me so sad.. my girl descent is trying her best, she never did anything wrong in her life ever actually

its really fucking sad man. the odds are so entirely stacked against her, she had to be careful what she said and did because flowers' position meant he could just take entire control of the kids situation whenever he wanted. she wanted to protect fire and rivers so badly, but if she fought flowers she could lose her access to them and then theyd be alone with him

this was a much larger problem after they split up and fire was gone. she wanted to protect rivers from flowers, who was repeatedly expressing reluctance to go with him, but she was afraid of flowers retorting by demanding full custody. i think ive said this before but i dont think flowers even particularly wanted rivers around. it was more something he could hold over her head, something he knew she felt threatened by and couldnt do anything about. i cant help but wonder if he gained some satisfaction in knowing that descent could tell rivers was being abused but couldnt safely stop it. see this is what i meant earlier when i was saying that he gets worse every time i write for him its so grRRRRRRRR

anyways FIRE. fire. yeah i think fire expressed missing his mom pretty often when he first got to the divide. dune felt threatened by this and wanted to assure that fire wouldnt go back to his family. how else to achieve this but to alienate fire from his family? on a surface level her logic is almost understandable; if your mother was concerned with the abuse in her home why did she never take you guys away? kids arent stupid but they are very impressionable. i dont think at the equivalent age of an 11 year old (fucking Yikes btw) that fire would have fully understood the power dynamics at play in his family. dune knew flowers was high council. she knew, at least to some extent, that the situation would have been very difficult for descent to navigate, but it suited her narrative better if she left those nuances out and instead made fire's mother out to be uncaring and inactive

i think dune did a lot of listening to fire at first, rather than guiding things. she wanted to understand the dynamics at play here before she began twisting the narrative, and she also wanted to give fire the impression that she was somebody safe to come to with his problems and feelings. the more she learned, the safer she felt twisting things

have this doodle of descent and rivers i coughed up tonight. saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad guys. the flowers effect

[shenrickyz]

UNKNOWN

5 times seojun makes sure to look after jisung, and 1 time jisung returns the favor

FEATURING ᝢ kang seojun, park jisung, & nct dream ensemble. WARNINGS ᝢ 5+1 things, mentions of mark's graduation, overworking, and implications of depression. WORD COUNT ᝢ 9k  NOTES ᝢ okay okay so HIII!! first of all, this is for the biggest seoji fan ever aka @junjiie, also my bsf ever jj we all love you ☹️💟 second of all, this doesn't even scratch the surface when it comes to seoji, their dynamic is so intricate that i can't even to explain them bc i'll go crazy and start sobbing uncontrollably from how much i love them 😭😭 third, yes this is a 5+1 thing, going back to my ao3 roots and shit, you will never know the name of my account btw..🙁 just know there were a lot of weak hero things on there, i miss ao3 (i got locked out of my account), anyway, yeah this is a very experimental i wrote through many many all nighters and many iced coffees, but now it's done, seojun might be one of my fav nct ocs sorry zixin & niko 💗 seojun cutest person ever wbk!! okay bye bye dont crucify me pls 🙏

one

jisung is on one of his nightly walks again.

nightly walks around the dorm that is, he isn't about to go outside at one in the morning, one; because renjun would definitely kill him if he ever found, and two; he doesn't need fresh air right now.

jisung finds his own body confusing, he's tired, but can't sleep. the ground is practically stabbing his feet, but he's already walked seven circles around the couch in this short amount of time. he feels out of it, he craves something, not food, he's not hungry, he's not thirsty either, he doesn't know exactly he feels. he's sleepless, yeah, but sleep probably won't do the trick.

thoughts are rampant in jisung's mind, many thoughts. the fucking comeback, the hours of practice he's gonna subject himself to, the hours of recording they'll have to endure, the hours he's spent without even eating, how is he still alive? he might collapse onto the floor in this very moment and sleep just like that.

but instead of that, jisung (or his feet, he guesses) has other plans. he stops his tenth lap around the couch and beelines towards seojun's room, those thoughts still rampant in his mind as he starts his way there.

seojun always pulls all-nighters, he truly only needs 3 hours of sleep to thrive in this world (his words, not jisung's). the other doesn't really get how that's healthy, considering seojun's a dancer, and he's constantly up 24/7, sleep should one of his top priorities, jisung doesn't understand how he never gets tired, but he guesses the constant need to be doing something is a huge factor.

the light in his room is on, jisung can see from the crack under the door, and even if it wasn't on, seojun is always awake. he lightly twists the doorknob, peaking his head through the opened door.

seojun is, of course, doing like three things at once. he's cleaning his glasses, has a book open, and is singing along to a song playing in his mind. when he hears the door open, he glances up, smiling at the sight of his fellow 02 liner. "hi, what's up?"

jisung pauses, holding the door with his shoulder so he can use his right hand to scratch his arm, he shrugs, licking his lips. "can't sleep" he says easily, and seojun just hums, sitting up.

he doesn't say any more, patting the spot beside him on his bed, beckoning for jisung to sit with him. the younger doesn't think twice before closing the door behind him (gently though, because hikari has issues with noise). the moment he sits himself down with seojun, he feels comfortable, cozy.

"why'd you come to my room?"

"you were the only one awake".

a lie, a pretty obvious one too. jisung knows hikari is also awake, he usually gets plagued with sleeplessness when comeback preparations roll around. jisung doesn't really know why he lied, it's not like seojun would reprimand him or anything.

seojun doesn't need to know it was a lie, though.

"mmh" seojun looks back to his glasses, putting the napkin back in the case. "why can't you sleep, ji?" he asks, glancing down at the book he'd previously been reading.

jisung glances down as well, eyes focusing on seojun's bracelet. "i don't know.." he mutters, beginning to fiddle with seojun's blanket, his nose scrunched as he takes in a deep breath. "just thinking, i guess".

"ah" seojun puts on his glasses and shakes his head. jisung always thought seojun looked exceptionally pretty like this— not that seojun isn't usually exceptionally pretty, jisung just thinks he looks so good in this current state. somewhat messy hair, reading glasses on, no makeup, just.. seojun. "so what? you want me to read you a story or something?"

"no i just.." jisung pauses, scouring his mind for the right words to say. seojun's eyes go back and forth, between the younger and pages on the book before him. "i'm just— i'm thinking too much, i need to just sit down and be fine".

jisung doesn't really think the words make sense, but seojun gets it, and jisung can see that he does with the way his eyes soften. "so you just want to sit in silence?" he asks, fingers caressing the cover of the book in his hands. jisung's eyes follow seojun's fingers, humming lightly.

"not really.. can we just talk?"

"about what?"

jisung groans, covering his face with his hands. "i don't know just.. stuff" anything to distract him from his irritating thoughts, he doesn't want to think about the comeback, or the performance, or sm, or anything pertaining to that, he just wants to talk about stupid shit, talking with seojun will relax his mind. "just don't be quiet".

"well lucky for you, park, i'm a professional loud mouth".

oh do i know.

jisung makes himself comfortable, lying his head down on one of seojun's many pillows. the older simply smiles down at him, glancing back at his book and only skimming the page before turning it. "what's keeping you up tonight?"

"comeback thoughts" jisung answers immediately, getting only a small hum from the older. "i don't know, i'm nervous, anxious, worried that i'll slip up and put the whole group in jeopardy?"

his tone is questioning, like he's even confused on why he's having such thoughts, but seojun doesn't reply. the silence isn't a taunting silence, one where jisung can tell seojun is making fun of him in his mind, it's more of a silence of solace, jisung likes how the air in the room feels, his thoughts aren't yelling at him right now, they're silent, they don't bother him. "is that weird?"

"it's weird that you think you'll ever mess up" the park almost rolls his eyes at the kang's words, but he doesn't interrupt him. "you're an amazing member, jisung, you're talented, you never slip up, and you'd never bring down the group".

"you're just saying that to make me feel better.."

"i say it all the time, though" seojun adds, and jisung has to admit, he is right, but he wants to remain stubborn, wants to ignore his reddening cheeks. "and i mean it, ji, don't ever think about yourself like that, you're important, and everyone thinks so".

the words make jisung pause, he doesn't have an immediate answer for them. seojun is just so good at doing that, making him speechless. it's not like what he said was new or revolutionary, seojun says shit like this all the time, it's just something about him, not exactly his words.

seojun makes jisung feel things he can't explain.

jisung's silence doesn't bug the older, who just takes his hand, intertwining their fingers. "you— we'll be fine".

"we always are, aren't we?"

at the words, seojun snickers, unconsciously tightening his hold on jisung's hand. "yeah, we always are".

two

these days, jisung is easily tired.

maybe it's just the back to back promotions, having to learn five new choreographies and master them so he doesn't make a mistake on stage, so he doesn't upset any of the members. they're all having a rough time as well, he can't even begin to imagine how mark and donghyuck feel, knowing they have to do these promotions and also prepare for their upcoming 127 comeback (and apparently with a song they hate too, donghyuck is not a fan of sticker).

jisung just chalks up his exhaustion to the many hours he trudges around the practice room, doing the same dance seventeen times with minimal breaks, no sleep, then waking up and having to repeat the next day.

and jisung thinks it'll all be fine, because he has never actually ever been behind. if he has to force himself to learn a new choreography, he will, he doesn't care if one of his legs falls off, by the time jisung is seventy, he's probably still gonna be dancing himself to death.

so here jisung is, trying his best to keep his eyes open as he stares out the window of the van. it's way too late, schedules took way too long today, jisung just can't wait to get home, to lie down on his bed, and let the sleep take him away.

but for now, he's awake, wide awake. he's not exactly sure why he's keeping himself awake, some dumb reason he can't explain through the fatigue plaguing his own body. it's not like no one else is asleep, chenle dozed off forty five minutes ago, hikari and jeno are both gone, laying their heads on each other. it looks like sleep is about to take jaemin away pretty soon, renjun is silently sleeping in the seat in front of them, whilst mark and haechan are watching stupid videos, tired, but not tired as if they're about to sleep.

and seojun, seojun is wide awake.

seojun is always wide awake, jisung can never get it. seojun is one of the youngest members, and young people need sleep (that's what everyone says, at least), but every time jisung looks at seojun, he's awake. jisung doesn't know the last time he's seen seojun sleep— of course he sleeps, but jisung hasn't seen him doze off in a long time, the older must be an owl or something.

jisung finally stops looking out of the window, glancing over at seojun beside him. he takes his time observing the older. seojun is listening to music, a cnblue song, jisung can hear it faintly from his headphones. he lightly chuckles at the fact, and it seems that seojun hears him, removing one of his headphones. "did you say something?"

jisung suddenly startles, shaking his head through the tiredness attacking his body. "no i just.. nothing i said nothing".

seojun blinks, humming. he turns off his headphones, taking them off. "why aren't you sleeping?"

the question puzzles jisung. "what do you mean?"

"you're tired".

it's not a question, the words that escape seojun's lips are a remark, a statement. he isn't asking jisung if he's tired, if he wants to sleep, he's telling jisung that he's tired.

"that's funny" jisung replies, it's not surprising for seojun to have predicted this, it's obvious that he's tired, there are clear bags under his eyes, he can barely speak above a whisper, and he keeps having to pick himself up when his head starts slipping down, beckoning him to such a desirable slumber. "you just.. know?"

"it's pretty obvious" seojun responds, he doesn't display any kind of exhaustion, something that is absolutely stunning to jisung. seojun should be knocked out cold, he always does so much, but he never seems to ever be tired, he has to be some sort of superhuman, how does he survive without sleep? jisung will never know. "and i know you".

jisung could never disagree with that. sometimes, he thinks seojun might be a mind reader. he always knows when it comes to jisung, he can pick apart the smallest things, notice the smallest differences, and can somehow always know what he's thinking. on certain occasions, it freaks out jisung, just how much seojun knows, but on most occasions, it just confuses jisung.

"yeah, you know me so well.." jisung mutters, his tone is meant to come off as sarcastic, but seojun clearly can't notice because of how low he says it. he looks down at his feet, bumping them together.

"you should sleep".

jisung disagrees, he doesn't know why, he just wants to stay awake, staying awake is what he wants to do. "i'm not.. sleepy".

"you're a terrible liar" seojun chuckles, merely glancing at his phone before focusing all of his attention on the maknae. "you can sleep, you know, i'll wake you up when we get back".

"i don't wanna sleep".

"yes you do".

"no i don't".

"you do".

"i don't".

this childish back and forth comes out of nowhere, and it goes on for much longer than it should. it's nothing serious, playful bantering like this between the two has always been prominent in their relationship, arguing over stupid things has always been a them thing to do.

"will you stop fighting me on this?" seojun asks, his voice softening. "there's nothing wrong with sleeping, why don't you want to?"

"if i sleep, i'll sleep for too long".

seojun raises an eyebrow, clicking his tongue (a habit which makes jisung's stomach flip in ways that are so strange), a small hum leaves his lips and he leans back in his seat. "why's that a bad thing?"

"because i have to wake up early tomorrow to get extra practice in".

seojun laughs again, his laughter is a pretty harmony, one jisung loves witnessing. he doesn't mean to focus on it so much, the curve of seojun's mouth that is, but he does, he can't stop himself.

he feels himself get flicked in the head by the older, and a small yelp escapes his lips. "you dummy, that's really what your worried about?"

"dummy? you could at least not insult me.." jisung frowns, rubbing his forehead as he reels from the flick from seojun.

"seriously jisung, you need sleep".

jisung scoffs. "that's ironic for you to say" his words make seojun snort, he can't disagree with that. he's much too lively at a time like this, after the day they had, seojun still finds time to be awake, even while most of the members let their exhaustion take them away to dreamland. "you never sleep".

"this isn't about me, though" classic seojun, deflecting from anything pertaining to him and focusing on jisung. "it's alright if you sleep, i'll make sure to wake you up for your early practice".

the words come out in a joking way, but jisung knows seojun is serious when he says them, he just knows seojun, he knows how he is. seojun is always going to look after him, no matter how stubborn jisung tries to be, the older will never truly let him. taking care of him is his thing, jisung thinks the other will be looking after him until he dies.

and he wouldn't really mind it anyway.

"i—"

"jisung" seojun grits his teeth, the tone is a warning, the kind of tone mark uses with the group when they're acting like idiots. jisung thinks it's so weird when seojun talks like this, because energetic, childish, outgoing seojun should never be sporting a tone like this. "don't argue with me, you need to sleep, i'll wake you up, you know it".

i do. but jisung doesn't say that, he just lets out a tired chuckle, shaking his head. "you're so assertive.." he mutters, scooting closer and leaning his head down onto seojun's shoulder.

"anything to make sure you get sleep" seojun carts his hand through jisung's hair, an easier way to coax him to sleep, but jisung doesn't think it was on purpose, just seojun being seojun. "i'll wake you up tomorrow, and when we get back".

he doesn't need to reiterate his words for jisung to know, seojun is always going to take care of him, making sure everything is going okay with him. "uh huh, thanks".

though jisung says those words with a tone of mild irritation, he doesn't mean it.

and seojun knows, because he always knows.

three

"hyung have you seen my—oh.."

jisung can't even focus on what he's looking for anymore, because he walks into the kitchen turned bakery and experiences a type of whiplash he doesn't think could ever be replicated. he's met with the immediate aroma of chocolate chips, cookies, cookies are being made. he stops in his tracks, because the sudden chocolate chips which litter his nose aren't the only surprise.

"oh hi jisungie!" jaemin exclaims, quickly taking jisung's attention away from everything else. "what were you looking for?" jisung feels like his mind has gone blank as he tries to figure out everything he needs to articulate right now.

"my uh.. my watch" he responds, but the watch is the furthest thing on his mind. "why are you all, baking?" he finally asks, catching the attention of his fellow members.

"were doing something nice for mark!" renjun exclaims, his words muffled, his mouth is full of something. "celebrating golden hours release!"

ah, that makes sense. jisung finds the gesture cute, how they're gathering together to do something nice for mark, he really is special to them. all of them. "oh, so you're making just cookies?" he asks, not knowing what to do, so he just stands awkwardly.

"no, were making brownies too".

"were trying to make brownies" jaemin corrects, making donghyuck whip his head back to glare at him. "you didn't even get the right cocoa powder for the recipe".

"okay and? the brownies will still be good it's not like mark will even notice!"

and just like that, the pair begin arguing. wow, how fitting for them. jisung is quick to tune out of their argument, instead walking around to the other side of the kitchen counter, making his way to a certain someone.

seojun had been quiet the whole time, which is, frankly, unusual. jisung notices immediately how focused he is on making sure the cookie dough and chocolate chips mix together perfectly, so focused that he doesn't even look up to greet jisung when the younger stands beside him.

"hello? earth to seojun?" jisung calls out, suddenly craving the older males attention. the kang finally looks up, but he doesn't pause his aggressive mixing, his arm continuing to do it's thing. "are you okay?"

"hm? yeah, why wouldn't i be?"

"well.. you're quiet" jisung immediately remarks, opting to tell seojun about his newfound observation instead of making small talk. "that's weird".

seojun snickers, poking jisung's cheek (a gesture which the younger pretends to be annoyed by). "i just need to make sure these cookies are perfect, i want mark hyung to like it.."

he pokes his tongue through his inner cheek, and jisung simply nods. he gets it, seojun's need to impress mark goes way back, all the way back to their trainee days, where an eleven year old seojun would do extra well in practice just to get better praises from mark. "he will, when have you ever disappointed him?"

jisung can't do the complimenting as well as seojun does, but at least they have the same affect, because seojun smiles. a small, cute stretch that highlights his pretty pink lips.

jisung has no idea why he's staring there anyway..

"you know what, you're right, i shouldn't be stressing so much about this, these are just baked treats at the end of the day".

"glad you can see that".

the pair go unnaturally silent, the chatter of their fellow members still prominent in their ears, but nothing else seemed to matter to the 02 liners. jisung doesn't break the silence, intertwining his finger with seojun's. seojun has pretty hands, is that weird of jisung to say? no, he doesn't think it is. the rings that litter his fingers fit him so well, a barrage of gold and silver metal that compliment him perfectly.

seojun, who also doesn't say anything, just takes the act of affection as it is. his lips part, as if he wants to say something, but he immediately closes them, staying silent. jisung doesn't try to force seojun to talk, seojun doesn't try to force jisung to talk, they just stand there with their fingers laced together, comfortable in the silence overtaking them.

then suddenly, the two of them engage in a high end staring content. at this point, everyone else seems to be absolutely useless, the only thing mattering in the moment being them and their little staring competition. jisung loses almost immediately, because he does the stupid thing and lets his eyes wander down towards seojun's lips, totally not purposefully of course!

seojun laughs at the direction his eyes go, and it makes jisung immediately look up, blinking at the older.

but before he can say anything, chenle's familiar pterodactyl screech sounds in their ears.

"SEOJUNIE! COME HELP ME PLEASE!"

the shout is enough to snap seojun and jisung out of their thing, and jisung's cheeks flare up immediately, he forgot everyone else was still here. seojun snaps out of his little daze much more naturally though, even with the red hue that tints his cheeks.

"coming!" seojun quickly looks back to jisung. "uh.. do this for me? please?" jisung could never really refuse, even if seojun was really just asking him to stir cookie dough and chocolate chips for him. "i'll pay you back".

"no no it's fine go help chenle" jisung whispers, not knowing if he could speak without his voice cracking. seojun smiles at him, a pretty smile, then quickly lets go of his bowl (and jisung's hand) to go and help the yelling chinese with whatever issue is plaguing him.

jisung takes over seojun's former job of stirring together cookie dough and chocolate chips whilst the older helps chenle with his issue. he listens to the continuous bickering of renjun and donghyuck, trying his best to ignore jaemin's knowing gaze, he feels it burning holes through the back of his head.

seojun isn't gone for too long, as he comes back giggling and ruffling chenle's hair. "thank you, jisungie" he whispers, quickly taking the bowl of now mixed cookie dough and chocolate chips away from the maknae.

"no problem" jisung politely smiles, not even looking seojun in the eye, but the older seems to find his awkwardness cute, because he pinches the younger's cheeks. "what was that about?"

"what? with chenle?"

no, the other thing. jisung is referring to their little staring contest, that random moment they had, where no one else seemed to matter, like it was just them in the room and nothing else was going on, but jisung doesn't want to ask about that while everyone else is still in the room. "yeah.. uh— with chenle".

seojun narrows his eyes, but just hums, beginning to shape the cookie dough so it can start baking. "chenle just couldn't reach for something, he needed my help".

"ah" jisung hums, chewing on his bottom lip as he averts eye contact with the older, who blinks at his sudden silence. "are all of these enough?" he abruptly asks, changing the subject, much to the dismay of seojun. "mark hyung won't ask for more?"

"if he does ask for more we'll just make more!" hikari shouts from another part of the room, answering jisung's question instead of seojun, who smiles, agreeing with his answer. "it won't be that hard".

jisung hums again, having no idea how to start up another conversation. "anything i can do to help?"

"you don't have to do much" seojun responds, finally turning away from the baking cookies and back to the maknae. "unless you want to be apart of haechan and jaemin hyungs argument about cocoa powder".

jisung snorts, humored by the suggestion. "no i think i'll pass.."

"speaking of jaemin hyung, did you find your watch yet?" seojun asks, and the realization suddenly dawns on jisung, he totally forgot that he was originally looking for his watch this whole entire time. "you haven't even tried to look for it?"

"i did! but then i got sidetracked by the baking and cookies and those two arguing over cocoa powder!"

seojun chuckles at jisung's response, cupping his face as he coos at the other. everything jisung does is cute, but everyone else thinks that as well!

it's just different when it's seojun..

"you're such an idiot, jisungie".

the nickname is stupid, but jisung loves when seojun says it (but he can't say that out loud, because the other members would pout about it all day). he doesn't mean to pick favorites, he just thinks seojun is extra adorable with the way he does things, and no that is not biased.

seojun continues shaking his head, sighing. "your watch is in my room".

jisung blinks, puzzled by the words. "my watch is in your— how did it even get there?"

"you tell me, i didn't even know it was there until like twenty minutes ago, you probably put it there and just don't remember".

"but that doesn't make sense i—"

"COOKIES ARE READY!"

jisung, again, gets cut off by a loud shout, and both 02 liners immediately whip their heads towards the second eldest, who jumps up happily at the sound of the oven dinging, indicating that the cookies were ready. "jeez, why is everyone yelling today?"

seojun snickers at the comment, head still turned away from jisung. "they have to combat the other shouting hyungs somehow" he mutters, patting jisung on the shoulder before going to hikari's side, helping him with the cookies.

once they're placed onto the kitchen counter, an immediate argument starts between renjun and donghyuck, who are talking about uneven chocolate chips or something. jaemin is begging hikari to try a cookie, but the older doesn't give into his demands, and it seems that he's working a double shift, because he's making sure to slap chenle's approaching hand away each time it gets closer to the plate. jeno, on the other hand, is just standing by, helping his bo— hikari by also shooing chenle away from the batch of cookies.

jisung is just staying silent, standing by as his members get up to their own things. seojun, again, comes back to his former spot beside him. the older doesn't say anything, just reaches for jisung's hand and laces their fingers together. "what?"

"what?"

"why the sudden hand holding?"

"we were doing this before.." seojun mutters, and jisung doesn't try to shake his grip off or anything, just allows for seojun to intertwine their fingers. he smiles lightly at the fact, a smile that doesn't go unnoticed by seojun. "you like holding my hand".

"don't get too cocky".

jisung allows for his eyes to cast towards the plate of cookies on the table, and seojun notices right away, because of course seojun notices right away. "what? you want one?"

confusion colors jisung's face, and he shakes his head. "i mean yeah but hii would never let m—"

seojun doesn't wait for him to finish, grabbing a cookie from the plate and handing it over to jisung. "he's occupied with jeno hyung, he won't mind".

"but what about mark hyung?"

seojun snickers, taking jisung's hand and putting the cookie in it. "he won't mind, i'm making an exception for you, everyone will get it" jisung wants to protest, but he can't, because who is he to turn down the lovely seojun's lovely offer?

"don't worry, i'll cover for you if hii or injunie ever finds out" seojun whispers, giving a short glance to the older members in the room before raising his pinkie towards jisung's. jisung uses his free hand to take his pinkie and intertwine it with his. "pinkie swear".

jisung laughs, even if there is a cookie in his mouth. though he can't respond, seojun gets what he means, smiling lightly at him.

four

"are you going for an insomniac world record or something?"

the question makes jisung snap out of his little late night daze, and the moment he catches sight of seojun, a tired smile makes its way to his lips. the older comes up to the couch and ruffles his hair, an equally tired smile on his lips as he then turns away to go get himself some water. "i'm not an insomniac, sleeping is just becoming difficult these days".

"anything in particular keeping you up?"

jisung pauses, taking a yawn. of course there's a lot keeping him up, the groups future, mark's graduation, other upcoming graduations, what all of that means for the group in general, his role as a member of the group, but he doesn't say all of that, just hums as a response to seojun's question. "a lot".

"don't wanna elaborate?"

"not now".

the older 02 liner makes his way around the couch, throwing jisung's legs off to make space for himself. the younger groans, but ultimately allows seojun to do so, as the younger quickly takes his place on the couch. "don't whine you big baby".

jisung frowns, but ultimately lets his legs fall off the couch. he enjoys seojun's company, he doesn't want the older to leave. he likes that he's here. "i'm not whining, just annoyed that you made me move".

"you can always just kick me off the couch" yeah, jisung can, but that doesn't mean he will. he feels much more relaxed with the older there. he would never make seojun leave a room, he enjoys being around him.

"yeah.." jisung mutters. he's bored, overwhelmed with thoughts, and he feels like everything is going wrong. "but i'm lazy" he answers quickly, a good excuse, seojun won't suspect a thing.

the older hums, silent. he observes jisung for a moment, eyes scanning his body, he pauses for a moment, fingers picking at a spot on the couch, and then he stands up, sighing. "get up".

surprise colors jisung's face. "what?"

"up, i'm gonna give you a massage".

jisung blinks, completely puzzled about what the hell seojun must've picked up on. "a massage? why do you want to give me a.."

"your posture's gonna go to shit if i don't" jisung picks up on the uncharacteristic swear, but he can't exactly argue with seojun. so, begrudgingly, the maknae sits up and sighs, he always ends up giving into seojun doesn't he?

"my posture is fine" jisung argues silently, lightly wincing as he feels seojun's thumbs make contact with his back. the older gives the younger a look of bewilderment. "what?"

"why did you even wince?"

"because.. your fingers are cold".

seojun chuckles at the response, starting off much more gently this time. "your shirt is that thin?"

jisung lets out a short breath, looking away from the older. "yes, it's also the middle of the night and everything that touches me feels cold, seojun".

"no need to be such a pessimist".

jisung yawns, closing his eyes as seojun kneads the muscles in his back. he has to admit, he is getting the slightest bit relaxed. "not pessimistic just tired".

seojun hums once again, a small smile coming to his that he doesn't allow jisung to see. "so what's bothering you?"

"hm?"

"what's bothering you? tell me" seojun responds immediately. "is it mark hyung?"

jisung's silence is enough of an answer to him. seojun makes an indescribable sound, then takes a deep breath. "you miss mark?"

"everyone misses mark" jisung finally opens his eyes. "it's not just mark it's.. everything, the group, the company, future promotions, the stupid graduation system, all i want is for us to  be like how we were when we debuted but now mark hyung is gone and hii has all this added stress and.. i don't know what to do, it's all eating me up inside".

jisung then lets another wave of silence hit as he finishes his long spew of words. seojun doesn't respond immediately, taking in the words and thinking of a response, but jisung doesn't doubt seojun, because he always knows what he needs.

"i just want everything to be okay—"

"it will be" seojun cuts in, a weary escaping his lips as he pokes his tongue through his inner cheek. "it's important to remember that you can always come to me with things like this, it's alright to talk about how you feel and i just.. i don't want you to feel like your alone in these thoughts because you're not and.."

jisung hears seojun's voice break, and when he glances back at the older, he's looking somewhere else, fingers still gently kneading jisung's back as he tries his best to think of what to say next. "i don't know, it always feels hard to think clearly these days".

jisung's face falls, seojun doesn't disclose things like this, he'd rather die before ever crying in front of anyone. he bites his bottom lip, but seojun shakes off whatever he was previously thinking, lightly laughing to himself. "sorry i don't know where that came from".

"no no no it's fine it's good to talk about how you feel".

seojun snickers, humored. "well now you sound like me" he turns jisung's head back forward, being only the gentlest with him, of course. the older treats jisung as if he's a fragile piece of glass. "i know i'm usually jokey or whatever but.. i don't know i'm just worried for the future of the group, i don't know what i'm going to do after graduating".

jisung blinks. "what's that supposed to mean?"

seojun goes silent for a few moments, letting out a small sigh. "seorin and i were talking about it once, how following graduation i'd probably leave the group".

just the three words 'leave the group' are enough to make jisung's stomach drop, he feels like he's about to throw up just hearing them. seojun can't leave.. what would that be like? how would jisung fare well if seojun wasn't around?

"what do you mean leave?"

seojun sighs. "jisung—"

"you can't leave! you're not going anywhere, your— your staying" jisung doesn't ask, he states, all seojun can do is pause his little ministrations and try to calm down the youngest.

"jisung—"

"why did that conversation even come up?"

"because we were just talking and.." seojun hides his face behind his hands. "i don't know, i don't have much use after i graduate i'll just be tossed out by sm, it doesn't really matter what i do".

"yes it does" jisung presses, grabbing seojun's hands. "you're not leaving the group, i'm not going to let you".

seojun allows for himself to laugh. "you're not going to let me?"

"no, and chenle won't either, probably, you can't go it'll just—" jisung pauses, gathering his words. "it won't be the same without you".

seojun stays silent for a while, basking in the feeling of jisung's hand in his own and their breathing in the now soundless living room. "okay, i'm sorry i just.." he twirls a strand of hair between his finger. "i don't know, i was just in a bad spot when i brought that up, i'm just not feeling my greatest".

jisung frowns again, now upset that the older is upset. "it's really fine, if you want to talk about it we can.."

"no, we don't have to" seojun quickly dismisses, waving off jisung's words. the maknae narrows his eyes, a look of pity in them that he knows seojun hates more than anything. "just— let's finish with this stupid massage and get you to sleep".

"what about you?"

"what about me?"

right. jisung doesn't know what he should've expected, seojun putting himself first is one of the rarest sights he'll ever behold in his lifetime. he sighs lightly as the older continues with the gentle pressing of fingers into his back, slowly feeling himself get sleepy from the ministrations. "on another note, i'm pretty sure seorin hates me".

seojun giggles. "seorin does not hate you, she literally told me she likes you!"

"then she must've been lying cause i don't remember the last time she looked at me like she wanted me in the room".

seojun narrows his eyes at jisung, finding the statement about his sister hard to believe. "she'll warm up to you eventually".

jisung frowns, sending seojun an 'are you serious?' look. he often feels awkward around seorin, yeah she's nice and everything but she always glares daggers at jisung, he assumes it's all unintentional, but it doesn't stop him from being endlessly intimidated by her.

seojun can't believe the words escaping jisung's lips, because to him, seorin is probably the least intimidating person he knows, but he also knows her better than anyone else. "i hope that eventually is soon because i can't deal with feeling like your own twin sister hates me".

"she doesn't" seojun reassures once again, stopping his message and placing his chin on jisung's shoulders. "can't you trust me on this?"

jisung finally gets to look at seojun closer, though he rarely has to turn his head to get a good look at the older. "i always trust you" he whispers unconsciously, he originally meant to think that, but judging by seojun's reaction, he knows that he indeed did not think it, and he said it out loud.

if there's any sign of a red hue on seojun's face, he quickly shakes it away and clears his throat. "alright um— massage over, it's time to sleep".

seojun quickly moves away from jisung, whose silently confused about his change in behavior. "seojun?"

"hm?"

"can i uh.." jisung pauses, he doesn't stand up right away, feeling seojun poke his cheek and then pull it. "can i stay in your room tonight?"

seojun chuckles immediately, probably his fastest response to jisung this whole night. "of course, you didn't have to ask" jisung knows that, seojun would've even made the offer himself, that's just the way he is.

jisung just knows how seojun is, he's become very in tune with the older.

"okay come on, you need sleep".

and what else can jisung do but follow?

five

"it's cold".

if jisung knew having to promote in the middle of the december meant he'd be provided a sweater only half the time, he would've faked a sickness or something. don't get him wrong, all the songs are so fun to perform, but he was never truly on board with the whole winter special album thing, he likes performing in not so hot but not so cold temperatures. having to promote in the middle of december is not his thing, even with him being a winter baby himself.

he felt as if he wasn't made for the cold.

"you've been saying that for the past five minutes, we get it jisung-ah".

jisung gasps at the comment from jaemin, feigning offense at the words. he doesn't care if he has to repeat it another seven times, he will, it's unbearably cold in this waiting room, and jisung isn't wearing anything that covers his arms. of course he isn't the only one here without a sweater, hikari is currently on his phone, trying his best not to shudder, and jaemin seems to be happy in all of his sweater-less glory, probably because he gets to show off his arms or something.

"well as i will continue to say that! it's freezing in here!" jisung exclaims, a frown on his face as he earns nothing but a laugh from his fellow members. he crosses his arms, looking away from the rest of the group in fake anger. "i'm the maknae, you guys should be caring for me.."

"just ask noona for a sweater".

"i— she's busy i don't want to waste her time!" jisung is quick to yell, but he really just doesn't know how to approach her, he doesn't want to make anything awkward. he also just really hates asking for help, so he lets the goosebumps begin appearing on his skin, trying his best not to shiver in the freezing temperature of the room.

"then stop complaining if you won't ask" jisung snaps his head towards chenle, opening his mouth to make some snippy remark, but he's quickly cut off by the small sound of the door colliding with the wall. "we're back~!"

in walks mark and, of course, seojun, who are wearing joyous smiles on their faces, plastic bags in their hands. jisung hums at the sight of them, whilst donghyuck jumped up excitedly at the sight of the leader and second youngest. "did you get them!?"

mark sighs, pretending to be disappointed that the snacks they went to get are all donghyuck cares about. "yes, we got them, we got enough as well".

"we've been saved! thank you!"

jisung watches the members rush to get the snacks they so desperately begged the others for, he doesn't really want anything, he's not hungry at the moment. so now the members are gorging on their little treats, their hearts happy, thanks to mark and seojun. "you don't want anything?"

"hm? no, i'm fine" jisung responds quickly, but then he feels uncomfortable again, trying his best to keep calm in this terribly freezing room. "it's just so cold!"

mark raises an eyebrow. "you're cold?"

"what do you mean? it's very cold in here.." hikari chimes in, clearly shivering when he mutters those words. the leader, whose wearing a jacket, has no idea what kind of cold these two could even be feeling at the moment. "jisung's been professing that for the past hour".

"not the past hour! it's just.. very cold" jisung reiterates for pretty much the hundredth time that hour, trying his best to warm himself up by rubbing his hands together.

"you guys are cold? i'm hot" seojun comments, unzipping his sweater as he stares at his fellow 02 liner, who gives him a dumbfounded look, it seems that hikari also shares the sentiment jisung has in his head.

"that's cause you're weird! you never get cold!"

"well it's not cold!"

"it's never cold for you!"

jisung exchanges glances between the two nct sei members, humored by their small argument about the weird temperature physics regarding seojun's body. jisung finds seojun confusing, he's constantly energetic but never tired, constantly hot but never cold, what kind of a person is he?

"jeez your shivering.."

jisung flinches the moment seojun's finger graces his goosebump filled arm, his hands are always so cold, he thinks seojun might be a walking ice block, elsa's long lost cousin or something, he's always so cold, a clear contrast to his personality. "yeah i'm shivering! do you not the feel the below zero temperature in this room?"

"nope, your whining so much, you could at least take it like a champ like jaemin hyung".

jisung scoffs, wrapping his own arms around himself in other attempt to try and heat himself up manually. he gives a frown, and his fellow 02 liner does nothing but laugh at his display. "are you enjoying my misery, seojunie?"

"very much".

"of course you are" jisung crosses his arms, turning away from seojun with that same frown remaining on his face. he hears the kang chuckle again behind him, and a small shuffle he can't exactly explain.

it's not until jisung feels someone put something over his shoulder, that he realizes what happened.

seojun took off his sweater, and gave it to jisung.

the maknae immediately feels rebuttal, moving to take the sweater off but only feeling seojun's hand get placed on his shoulder. "don't even think about taking it off".

jisung sighs, shaking his head. "seojun i'm not wearing this.."

"you said you were cold, right? take the sweater" seojun doesn't seem to care, seeing that he looks virtually unaffected by the freezing temperature of the room. jisung's about to disagree again, and seojun can tell before he even opens his mouth.

"jun, i was just being overdramatic i don't actually—"

"jisung, stop being stubborn, your cold, i'll be fine" the older is quick to cut him off, shoving his hands into his pant pockets and humming along to a song playing in his head. it's that one paramore song he's been obsessed with since forever that jisung still doesn't know the name of.

jisung hesitates for a moment, registering the feeling of the sweater on his back. seojun just nudges him, a knowing look in his eye. finally, not wanting to be scolded any more for being stubborn, jisung puts on the sweater, the fabric smoothly slipping through his wrists and immediately making him feel comfortable. "uh.. seojun?"

seojun turns back to the maknae, smiling. "yes?"

jisung fidgets awkwardly, settling with the feeling of the fabric against his skin. "thank you" he says, just a little whisper that's meant to be kept between the two of them, jisung isn't sure why he whispers exactly, but he felt that in the specific moment, he couldn't control the volume of his voice.

seojun smiles at the words, his smile is beautiful, jisung thinks it compliments his features so well. "it's nothing, jisungie, you know i'm always here for you".

seojun doesn't have to say the words for jisung to know, his actions already speak loud enough to him. the maknae continues to fidget with his fingers, but he shares a smile with seojun, a small feeling of elation soaring through him.

jisung knows that, as long as seojun's around, he's always going to look after him.

and he doesn't mind it, really, he loves it, in fact.

+ one

jisung feels like he hasn't seen seojun all day.

he's seen the older maybe once or twice, but he hasn't exactly seen him. he feels like he hasn't heard him speak, or seen him smile, or heard him crack some stupid joke in years, jisung knows even the most energetic of people have their days, but seojun? seojun is mr. 'i don't care how tired i am i'm going to scream in your face all day', but seojun practically feels invisible today.

jisung knows seojun is tired, he knows seojun, he knows the older's constant all nighters would catch up to him eventually, but he feels like a ghost today, like he's just dragging himself around.

jisung is.. very worried.

"where's seojun?"

the first person to look up is hikari, who seems just as confused as jisung. hikari usually always knows where seojun is, but that's because the older seems to have some tracking device on him or something. he blinks for a moment, confusion coloring his face. "i don't know.."

"for once" jaemin snorts, and all the older does is glare at him, flicking him in the forehead. jaemin gives his best pitched up squeal at the collision, pouting as he rubs his forehead, but hikari pays him no mind, waving him off. "ow! you're so mean.."

"stop being stupid then".

jisung just stands there awkwardly, still having no answer to his question, he has to admit, he is starting to get a little bit weird, his leg bouncing up and down as his mind races with..thoughts. if seojun were here, right now that is, he'd talk with jisung about it, he'd run his hand up and down jisung's back comfortingly and do the seojun thing.

the seojun thing is what jisung calls the little mind reading powers seojun has. seojun is basically a master at everything jisung, he can tell what he's thinking, why he's thinking it, what he's about to say, and why he's about to say it. he thinks seojun knows him more than he knows himself sometimes, he's just so good at things pertaining to him.

"you're looking for seojunie?" renjun suddenly inquires, entering the room with his eyes pointed at his phone. at the sight of jisung's nod, the older gives a small frown, but jisung can't figure out why. "he's still practicing, i think".

jisung furrows his eyebrows, it is way too late for anyone to still be at sm. "at this time?" he questions, what the hell is he doing? he only earns a shrug from renjun, who is just as confused as he is.

"he said something about wanting to get extra practice in, it has been a while, though.."

that's all jisung needs to hear, he mutters a tiny "thank you" and goes back to his room to get his jacket, not focused on anything but seojun and his weird late night practicing. when hikari and jaemin interrogate him on where he's going, all he says is that he's going to check up on seojun, make sure he's okay. he pretends to have no idea why jaemin is staring the way he's staring, whatever that taunting look means.

jisung doesn't like leaving the dorm after dark, it's strange to him, but he has to get seojun before the older ends up sleeping at the sm entertainment building.

his jacket isn't zipped up, and the nightly breeze isn't exactly warm, but jisung doesn't care, he's only focused on seojun, seojun who he pretty much hasn't seen all day, seojun who he pretty much hasn't heard all day, seojun who he just wants to make sure is okay, and healthy, and alive and totally not suffering.

when jisung steps into the sm entertainment building, a strange shiver run downs his spine. it's like a ghost town in there, save for a few murmurings he can hear from the some of the rooms littered in the halls.

but he doesn't allow for himself to stray away from his main objective, quickly turning and heading to the practice room. jisung always thought these halls spread way too far, it was only a good few feet, but sometimes, especially at night, it felt like an eternity. he almost feels like he walks forever, and when he makes it to the door of the practice room, he pauses.

it's silent, no music, no footsteps hitting the floor, no heavy breathing, it's just silent. the silence concerns jisung, because seojun is known for making noise, but he doesn't allow for his anxieties to amplify, just places his hand on the doorknob and turns it.

the lights are still on, jisung notices, so seojun couldn't have left. when he finally looks down, he finds seojun. seojun is dozed off, asleep on the floor with his arms caged around himself. jisung lets out a sigh of relief, it could've been worse, he doesn't exactly know how, but it could've.

but seojun's okay, he's just sleeping, taking a much needed nap. jisung hurries over to his fellow 02 liner, peacefully lying on the floor with his head rested on his arms. he taps him lightly, not wanting to startle the older. "seojun".

"hm?" the response is silent, and seojun shifts in just the slightest, but he doesn't open his eyes. jisung frowns, shaking him by the arm. "what? what?" that seems to do the trick, because seojun rubs his eyes, finally sitting up and trying to shake off any tiredness. "oh— oh god hi, what time is it?"

seojun looks shaken, like he just got hit with the worst kind of realization imaginable. jisung usually never sees him like this, but he guesses it has to do with him being tired. so, he gives a small smile, rubbing seojun's shoulder softly. "hi, it's like.. ten, almost eleven".

the words make seojun's eyes widen, he looks terrified, like this time was horrible for him or something. "oh— oh my god i fell asleep i didn't even mean to.."

"hey it's fine" jisung reassures, placing both of his hands on seojun's shoulders. "you were just tired, you needed that sleep anyway".

it doesn't seem the words ease any of seojun's worries, cause the older just looks away, the look in his eyes telling jisung that this is a much more important thing to him than he thought. "did you eat today?" the maknae immediately blurts, making seojun snap his head towards him.

the question is the kind of question seojun always asks, the kind of question he asks every few hours to make sure jisung isn't skipping meals. seojun pauses, thinking about it.. or thinking about what to answer. "..yeah".

jisung narrows his eyes, that's a lie.

"seojun".

"what? i'm not lying!"

"when?"

seojun scoffs, turning around with crossed arms. jisung sighs, he knows he's stubborn himself, but seojun is even more stubborn, he'll never admit his lies even if he was being held at gunpoint. "stop nagging me.."

"i'm not nagging you i'm concerned for your well-being!" jisung whisper-yells, pulling seojun closer to him, as the older was scooting away. "i just need to make sure you're alright, i haven't seen you all day and.. your health is important to me, seojun".

the older blinks, as if registering the words in his mind. jisung suddenly feels his face burn, feeling seojun's eyes look him up and down. seojun snickers, playfully nudging the younger. "aww, thank you" seojun gives his best fake pout, over exaggerating it to tease jisung.

jisung just scoffs, lightly pushing seojun's shoulder. the older just laughs at his response, staying on the floor as jisung gets up, dusting off his pants. "come on".

seojun blinks, as if dumbfounded. "come on where?"

"were going to the convenience store, i'm getting you something" jisung tries his best to pull seojun up off the floor, even with how the older seemed adamant on staying down. he's finally able to lift seojun up, much to the dismay of the kang, who frowns.

"you don't have to get me anything" seojun mumbles, staring down at his own moving feet on the floor. "don't spend your money on me" he says, looking up at jisung with an indescribable look on his face.

jisung just shakes his head. "don't try to argue with me, your hungry, you'd do the same for me.."

the words make seojun go silent, and he removes jisung's grip from his arm, intertwining their fingers. he's.. not used to this, he's the one who does the taking care of, he's not the one whose usually taken care of.

seojun has spent so much of his time in this group just looking after jisung, and the maknae never knew how to thank him besides giving him a few small smiles and muttering awkward "thank you's". seojun never asked for anything in return, obviously, but jisung always felt like he never offered enough to seojun, even with how the older has always been looking after him, since the two of them entered sm entertainment.

then, seojun smiles, squeezing jisung's hand laced with his. "thank you" he replies, turning away from the younger with a flustered feeling he can't exactly explain.

jisung smiles seeing seojun smile. "it's nothing, really, it's the least i can do".

seojun doesn't respond to that, just squeezes his hand again.

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

@intertexts BEHOLD. NEW HAVEN WARDS: THE WIBBY AND DAVID DYNAMIC ESSAY. this got way too fucking long 2 put in ur inbox so im making a post about it. ENJOY THE STICK FIGURE VIOLENCE <3

okay im just gonna start from the beginnign here and try not to get too sidetracked as i go (<< me when i lie) um. so. still not entirely clear on what williams trigger event would be so that may change how some of this works out logistics wise. but just assuming it would be SOMEWHAT similar to pd- william dies/has his near death experience and is Changed By It. in obvious ways that are impossible to hide. his parents find out because he had been missing for days and presumed dead so when he came back home covered in mud and dried blood and Different, everyone kind of broke down. they know about his powers from the start. william hates them (the powers, not his parents) but his dad especially has always been very supportive of capes and urges william to use them for something good! his mom, who has always grieved the lack of a relationship between her two sons, brings up the suggestion "hey, you know what! yeah! your older brother just so happens to live in a city with a really good cape population, maybe you can go live with him for a bit while you go to school <3" (<< this is also going off the assumption that the general public doesnt really. understand. capes much. his parents dont know theyre signing him up to be a child soldier and die before 40. they love him so much and just want the best for him- if they knew about all that they wouldve never even made the suggestion. but they see how much his powers are hurting him and theyre grieving the death of their youngest son who is still. awake and sitting in his bedroom. and i dont think any of them know how to deal with that)

william, not really having a place to argue from or another option to even consider, reluctantly agrees. hes too caught up in the fear and worry and unpredictability of his powers to even imagine himself as one of the heroes. but he goes anyway. and lives with david. its just as painfully icy as you imagine- david never signed up to be a permanent babysitter, i imagine theres a lot of. phonecalls overheard through the walls of his apartment of david on the phone with their mom asking if this was some sort of punishment. david spends all his time at his office and never takes time to even get to know william. he still takes care of him- he has the money for a penthouse apartment and keeps groceries stocked- but its not like theyre having cozy family meals every night. this does wonderful things for williams mental health obviously. which im sure makes his powers feel so much better (<< this is sarcasm). they dont talk much. obviously. william knows david works for/runs a branch of some tech company but thats about the extent of his knowledge and he never cares to ask further details than that. theres a little bit of resentment there on williams side (william wisp, known jealous petty little bitch- "i thought you were the first good thing to come out of deadwood"). david is someone who's important and has his life together and william is. in his own mind. a freak.

after joining the wards program and meeting dakota and virion and such. william IMMEDIATELY decides he is going to spend less and less and less time at davids place. and so the fucking. chasm between them grows. mutual good riddance. (they dont hate each other. theres just. not a whole lot of care there. but theyre still family, yknow?) and its just like. the BARE MINIMUM amount of contact. william stops by davids place to like. get stuff from his bedroom. uses davids apartment as storage for things he can't keep at the wards base (are teen superheroes allowed to smoke? i imagine that cant be good for their public image). so its not like they totally cut contact theres just. even less of it than there was before.

and then william learns about the SIGNIFICANT importance of keeping your cape and civilian identities separate. any villain who learns who you are behind the mask can be a threat to not only you but also your family. william, who loves his parents very much and knows they love him back, wants to protect them at all costs. conveniently, he doesn't live with his parents anymore. his current guardian just so happened to keep their mom's maiden name. so what does he do! bam. easy fix, change your last name to match with your brother. satisfies the heroes a little bit because its that extra step harder to connect william with people outside the city, AND its not suspicious on the civilian side either because. i mean he still matches surnames with his family. surely this will not come back to bite him (foreshadowing). i think it would be PERFECTLY in character and slimy for david to get a kick out of this name change btw. its been weeks since theyve spoken full sentences to each other but the next time william goes back to the apartment david is there at the kitchen table and just kind of laughs at the paperwork like "aw, little brother, i didn't realize you liked living with me that much. im flattered" etc. etc. eugh

behold! i can call him wibby now. awesome. so cool. anyway.

blahblah whatever whatever. im saying for au convenience david lives in new haven even though in pd canon he technically lives in freedom city. don't worry about it. HOWEVER. this becomes important. new haven wards are like?? vaguely sometimes in contact with the wards of the nearest settlement with a significant cape population- freedom city! this is alan, x, cantrip. I think they probably have like. fun friendly sparring matches sometimes (like the cage matches where they first met but like... legal. and mario kart!) but aren't close enough to be Friend Friends. freedom city wards uncover some shady underground company using illegal research (nhw equivalent of harttawa? dying 2 link this back to mark somehow bc im always thinking abt him but i KNOW u have plans for him already and im dying 2 know them) to give people artificial powers (connected to cauldron in some way but not obvious about it. ill explain this more in a minute) and guess who this gets linked back to. our one and only lovely wicked david bell. freedom city wards don't know williams connection to him since they wouldn't know his civ name. I don't think he would tell them. i also don't think they would actually TALK to David here like they do in canon, i think the heist goes a little more successfully and he's not actually physically THERE so all that happens is that they sneak in and see a bunch of files/papers. and william makes the connection with David's name and maybe picture. but the whole. killing a bunch of guards still happens. "its okay they're villains" etc. i don't know who would run freedom city wards program but they're more. loose about the rules than in new haven. which is why xavier and cantrip are Like That.

anyway on the way back to new haven william is REALLY shaken and dakota and virion obv pick up on that right away (i think they'd also know OF williams brother but not a lot of details bc he never talks about him.) william tells them that that was David and doesn't know what to do etc etc . I think he avoids the apartment for a looooot longer than he usually does because he doesn't want to accidentally run into David there and have to confront this. I think he's probably shell shocked by the idea a little- david is VERY MUCH against the hero program and doesn't like capes at all and is very vocal about that fact (this is pd canon too)!! why the fuck would he be working with the company that gives people powers and Makes More Capes! even though his mystery solving brain is going into overdrive thinking about the reasons and details and minutae of this discovery, william is also chronically avoidant of all his personal problems so i don't think he does any digging into it yet. until. well. the freedom city wards go missing

they on the other hand DID do a lot more digging into this. and david caught on to them and we end up with the scene in the basement . this is where I'm gonna get sidetracked bc there's a lot of information I'm thinking about at the beginning of all this

when william/vyncent/tide get there it's a very similar scene to in pd. x and cantrip are chained up, david has allen cut open on a table. william is. HORRIFIED. maybe even moreso than in pd.

x is even more immediately hostile to william when he and cantrip wake up because part of the information they uncovered in doing their own digging was the fact that david and william are related. and this pisses x off SO BAD because william never told them. and I think he uses wills secret identity against him and that's part of the reason william is SO DESPERATE to stop him. Just imagining that scene in the hallway at the beginning where they're screaming at each other and x just goes "that's your fucking *brother?* you're related to that monster and you never thought to, yknow, share that little bit of information with us?! william bell?????" and as soon as x says his name william just SNAPS and swings the axe at him .

anyway. back to the basement scene. david does his whole manipulative villain monologue with a scalpel to Allen's heart and we learn David is the head of an offshoot branch of cauldron (thinking about like maybe where they sell the vials to people under the guise of experimental medical treatment? for their own research purposes on how the vials affect people. real unethical shit! I feel like I need 2 learn more about cauldrons motivations before I set this in stone though) . anyway. we also learn here that david Has Fucking Powers. I don't know exactly what those would be right now but I think they would be pretty... inconsequential and at a really low power rating, but just that fact alone is enough for him to almost lose william completely.

this whole time william is just full of this icy dread and betrayal, but as SOON as david reveals he has powers that all just snaps to rage. comparable to that feeling where you've been bullied for something for years and then one day everyone decides that same thing is cool now. ("how long. how *long*, david? did you have these powers while you shunned me, sat on the phone with mom in the other room complaining about how much of a freak your little brother is? how *painfully sad* it is for you to share an apartment with the corpse of your baby brother, trying to get mom to pity you enough to take me back and get me out of your hair?")

and ofc david being who he is has some sort of slimy manipulation that saves his ass and gets william back on his side. tide and virion being there they immediately see right the FUCK through it but I think william would be compromised enough at that point that he wouldn't be thinking clearly enough to listen to them. (also side note . like I said I'm VERY undecided on what davids powers would actually be but the two ideas I've been bouncing back and forth are a) some kind of medical Thinker which is how he knows how to put allen back together the right way or b) some kind of Master which makes the manipulation thing worse <3. so maybe wibby is compromised bc davids using his powers on him. if it's the second option. smile!)

anyway wibby goes on his nightmare arc. right. even more fucked up bc of what x says to him about his identity. I actually think a lot of this stays the same but just with the addition of context and also the thing I said yesterday about the guards radioing to each other to evacuate.

everything happens pretty much the same with cantrip and he and virion getting back to the office only to find everything totally wiped clean already. william still does the Nightmare Thing in davids apartment afterward. still undecided in whether or not their parents will be there? I guess it depends on what we do with the trickster. (oh god I haven't even thought about the trickster irt new haven wards. fuck!) . I think actually I'm leaning more toward having them NOT being there? because I think william reigned himself in because he didn't want to scare them too much. and this is worm world i don't WANT wibby to reign himself in at all. I want him to go fucking nightmare apeshit.

btw this whole time? virion stays with him and it scares the SHIT out of him. he's still going to stay because ... this is william. this is his best friend (gay) and he HAS to trust that he knows what he's doing. I think afterward william stands up, david still unconscious on the floor, and there are silent tears streaming down his face and there's this expression of rage and betrayal and grief on his face that virion has NEVER seen on another person. so he reaches out to put a hand on his shoulder or maybe offer a hug (which in my mind is HUGE for him bc I've been imagining virion being SUPER careful and sort of avoidant about physical touch bc of his powers) but then william goes to brush his hand away as he walks out of the room and there's just the briefest moment of skin to skin contact. and it only lasts for maybe a second but virion gets this BURST of williams powers and it's terrifying. he can see and feel and hear and know *exactly* what william just did. it goes away almost immediately but the force of it is enough to throw virion off balance for a second as he processes it and when he comes to again he is just. shaking. and he doesn't say anything to william but he *knows* now and he doesn't know what to do with that information. hes scared out of his fucking mind but he's also. sad. he's REALLY fucking sad his best friend (gay) just had to do something like that. and he's not good with words so he doesn't say anything but he stays there. he stays by williams side despite everything. ughahhvhh

uhhhh final note. pain and suffering. william gets a whole Fucking Complex about sharing a name with david after this. but he still doesn't change it back to wisp because he knows x knows his identity now. which means he doesn't know how many other people could know, how many other people x will tell out of spite as a way to get back at him (<< william wisp paranoia WIN) and it's. LEAGUES better that any potential enemies would come after david and hurt david. (in fact he probably privately wishes for something like that to happen. hed never say that out loud though). using his name as a kind of shield even though it hurts like hell to be connected to his brother like that.

anyway! yeah! wisp-bell brothers torment nexus or whatever!

[cazluvsu]

some of ur fav nba fics? or recs?

thank u for this!!!!!

we, the world team - i feel i need to mention this bc it’s just So. imo it’s The steph/klay fic (rip) and personally i think it’s a great story and it made me bawl (so does everything else im emotional anyways moving on)

horizon - my fav jays fic Evaaaaa it’s so sweet. so love. ugh it’s so beautiful and it makes me want to go to greece. 10/10

left me like summer - i loved this fic. still do but man. i have reread it like 20 million times bc i love them so much. despite being a celtics fan i love gary/jordan dearly. they were everything 2 me

summer kitchen - THIS FIC IS SO. i love it. kyle/demar is not necessarily underrated but not talked abt enough for how incredibly queer they were . including myself i need 2 talk abt them more. anyways this au is 1 very funny in a good way imo and 2 fits them very well. great fic!!!!

rainbow skyline - Provably my fav jokmal fic it’s just so cheesy and cute!!!! literally them idc they’re cuteeeeeee

never-ending nosebleed - ant/kat dynamic makes me a tad cuckoo and this. Yeah! this is correct. idec it’s real

jonquil - OUUUUUU THIS FIC IS SO GOOD. single-handedly has gotten me on the lu/shai train. they are so adorable. also i am a sucker for royalty aus. perfect tbh

on fire for you - josh/donte is SO underrated in the nova knicks dynamic UGH they just love their little guy. who can blame them

every yes turns into i do - MARRIAGE FIC!!!! THEYRE SO MARRIED!!!!!! this fic had me Floored the first time i read it (i have read it many times since) nova knicks brain is never going to end i fear

mr stonedfaced & mr smiley - alpey/jaba is Such an interesting pair 2 me they are so silly… this fic does them great justice it’s wonderful

i don’t mind if you’re here all the time - this is sooooo cutie and i!!!! i didn’t fully get the cam/mikal hype but this made me see the light they’re adorable!!!!!!!!

incline - yet another jays fic bc they are 90% of my thoughts . floored. i love this fic.

shameless plug my fics Teehee

Obviously i didn’t put every nba fic i enjoy on this list but just know if u have written an nba fic i love u and i love it and it is Wonderful!!!! However. making this list has made me realize that i actually have Not read enough of these fics and i am so missing out!!!! so off i go to read . Moar. thanks!

[chasedeys]

Firstly your fics are INCREDIBLE I absolutely adore them <333 if you ever wanted to expand on Joe’marr vacationing/visiting NOLA together I’d love to read!! Maybe ja’marr’s family makes an appearance?? I love reading how others react to the ship in fics and what their dynamics are :))

hi!! thank you so much!!!!!!! i too love to read outside povs to a ship lolllll. prefacing this with i will try to write an actual fic/drabble of this!!! i will attempt it i swear!!!!! but please don't hold your breath 😭 in the meantime take this uncensored babble:

god id loveeee to write them cruising around nola so baddd. but like horrifically unsure abt actually writing this for real bc the research id have to do…….like i dont have the slightest clue what new orleans is like and i want to write the neighborhood and city yk?? 😭 and writing about their family gives me anxiety literally double triple overthinking everything like it matters that much like it's rpfiction i could technically just make shit up but 😭

BUT ANYWAY like i mentioned in this one paragraph –

They’ve spent what felt like hours just rutting inside the other once, during an off day—no media, no interviews, no meetings, no football—just the two of them locked in their tiny hidden rental somewhere in Bayou St. John with no expectations other than just being with each other. Joe’s nipples were so puffy. Ja’Marr’s throat hoarse from screaming. He misses the little private bubble of just two of them with such sudden intensity before it gets drowned out by their current act: still together, still in love.

in love with the idea of them having this tiny place in a quiet neighborhood in nola where nobody knows them (unlikely, i know, especially in nola of all places lmao) or just 1 or 2 neighbors who clock them and are fiercely protective of them!! it won't be the place for them to settle ofc joe loves ohio too much, ja'marr loves his friends too much social butterfly Needs to be surrounded with the guys he loves etc but this quiet nook for them to settle when it gets too much and they want to get away sometimes is Very Important to me okay. a little place somewhat near ja'marrs family home so he can recharge with them too!! the family home being a space where joes own family cherishes!!!!!

Driving out visiting ja’marrs old house when they can to do large family cookouts or just plain random dinners, annoying the family dog. Living alone trying and attempting to cook together bc both of them are class A disasters at it, slowly learning together making these breakfast omelets and cajun fried rice, finally not just eating unseasoned scrambled eggs and sad little protein shakes for breakfast, late night doordash or midnight meal runs to the weirdly open 24/7 chinese place idk. Morning runs to the nearest park and pushing each other on a rickety swing and joe falling over laughing bc ja’marr just slid on a muddy puddle and is now drenched in brown dirt only to skedaddle away because the mans sprinting at him stay the fuck away etc etc.

Just!! the large family cookouts?? both unable to cook for shit somehow getting roped to checking the seafood boil just standing🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️ dead quiet staring down at the closed pot like they're actually doing something while behind them ja'marrs mom stares at them incredulously and throws her hands up in exasperation, playing backyard football with the little nephews and nieces, joe’s own family arriving and meshing in with the chases, joes older brothers needling at jamarr for one thing or the other, getting to sit tangled up in one armchair together during movie night sessions, jamarrs sister throwing peanuts in their direction when they're being too grossly in love, jamarr losing a bet to his sister so he has to hang the laundry up in the morning but he drags joe to help him with it bc he's a dick and says random wedding vows for some reason and that gets joe moving for some reason, little football strategy sessions with the jimmys and all the other siblings and aunts and uncles turning into a mini food fight because they just won't get to a consensus because everybody in this mesh of family is so fucking stubborn etc etc. when jamarrs parent said something about how jamarr was a very hyperactive (?) child and they tried pushing him to football to tire him out only for him to get even more bouncy etc and smiling at each other when they clock jamarr settling down easy when joe has a hand on his shoulder to catch his attention for a convo aaaaaaa you get my vision????

And it pains me that joemarr don't do halloween bc i thought nola was all abt that afhjaskfsjj like girl what about the parades……..WHAT was the horrific scarring halloween experience?? but anyway imagining them dressing up over the top as to hide their identity taking the little nieces and nephews on a candy hunt, trying out a haunted maze booth thing and promptly latching on each others hand shaking bc the fuck is that hyperrealistic dead body doing there but joe stops to observe it closely in a dads-watching-construction-esque way while ja'marr gapes at him incredulously the worker in charge of that section has to peek out to awkwardly tell them to keep it moving sigh anyways this is all i can give you rn hehe

bye <3

[kirkwallguy]

please elaborate your hawke-anders-varric dynamic i'll make you a ferelden pumpkin pie

i feel like for once anders is the most normal person in this situation, but that's less because he's being normal and more because varric and marcus are crazy. in act 1 / before marcus and anders start dating, he's kind of equally obsessed with them both, he has an obvious deep infatuation with marcus that he's repressing (like. you know when youre 12 and don't know being gay is an option yet so you dont understand why you get so weird about your bestie? that's him except he's doing it in his 30s.) and with anders he's always down to be Gay As A Joke, and respond to anders' flirting and silliness because it's NOT gay to want to make your depressed friend smile. the whole love triangle of it all is never considered because varric is adamant he's straight and pretty sure marcus is as well. obviously he knows anders isnt because look at him

this is sustainable for a few years but obviously marcus and anders ruin it by getting together. varric REALLY disapproves of them dating but at first he mostly acts like he's concerned about anders. he keeps talking about how it won't last and how blondie is going to get his heart broken etc etc, to the point that people are actually thrown off a little and think he's in love with anders. but no he just thinks only HE can handle marcus lol. anyway no matter how much he tries to get them to break up they won't, and he slowly starts to resent anders as marcus starts prioritising him over hanging out at the hanged man or fucking around lowtown during the day.

(also this entire time marcus kind of hates varric but in the way you'd hate a brother. which doesn't help the situation at all.)

anyway, chantry explosion happens and this is varric's final straw, he sees marcus forgiving anders as a massive symbolic betrayal. the entire narrative twists in his mind so anders has always been the problem, he writes this narrative in his book (i love imagining that he doesn't explicitly write marcus and anders' relationship and it's left ambiguous/implied lol) and sends it to marcus to make him understand, but all marcus gets from it is "holy shit, varric's in love with me." (anders finds his hilarious because he's known since they all met and just assumed that was why marcus didn't like him)

umm this makes skyhold very awkward. because marcus is having such a terrible time (missing his family and surrounded by templars) he kind of just agrees to put everything aside and be civil with varric so he has someone to drink with in the evenings/to talk him out of killing cullen. they bond over the few weeks or so marcus spends there and it's almost like old times for a moment. but then marcus is sent to take the wardens to weisshaupt and says goodbye to varric. varric makes marcus promise to visit him in kirkwall when all this is over and marcus promises but doesn't mean it. they write a handful of letters to each other when varric is made viscount but aside from that they never speak again. marcus doesn't think about him much and varric never gets over him <3