#anyways when i say this happens in the middle of 7 i MEAN it's the middle of 7

[belphieslilcow]

dillys gets frustrated and goes on a rant in the tags teehee ~ ⋆｡°✩

[neoheros]

there are very little things in this world that sakusa deems valuable enough to not risk – his game, his career, his reputation, his name.

he isn’t a gambler but he is an athlete and when you’re in his shoes, playing in the big leagues, thousands of people watching, looking, judging, there are a lot of risks you have to look out for.

he has to be quiet, polite, say the right thing, say it in the right tone, say it in the right time, otherwise, he risks his job and reputation.

he has to be focused, agile, ready for any change in the volleyball world the minute - the second - it happens, otherwise, he risks getting left behind, getting replaced by someone better, newer than him.

he has to be a lot of things and the risks of not being any of it puts him in a corner - cold and confining.

all of it, he hates with a passion, he hates with an effort. so he doesn’t take any risks at all. not when it comes to his game, his career, his reputation, his name.

but you – you are probably the riskiest person he has ever met.

i mean, you guys work together for god’s sake. it’s an HR crisis waiting to happen. it puts everything he’s worked hard for at risk — his game, his career, his reputation, his name.

but still.

you always know the right things to say to him, always know the right time he’s gonna be there or the right place to sit where he sees you so clearly even in the middle of the court.

everytime you talk to him, everytime you touch him, everytime you say his name or bring him coffee, everytime you watch him play or everytime he sees you outside of work — there is a feeling in his chest and he almost hates it.

“there’s a new ramen restaurant in miyagi that i’ve been wanting to try…” sakusa clears his throat, standing a few inches away from the lockers as everyone gets their shoes on.

it’s a little bit after 4pm, practice for the day had just ended, and well, meian always tells him he needed to socialize more with the rest of the group.

the locker room is stuffy and sweaty and to be honest, he’s never really been fond of the smell wafting in the air, so he always makes it a point to be the first one out the door after he’s done changing.

today though, he stays, hangs around everybody, and even if he hates it, he goes, “does anyone want to come with me tonight?”

hinata looks up at him from his shoes, “sorry omi, gotta take natsu to the dentist after practice, i dunno how long it’ll take us.”

he gives hinata a short nod — that’s fine.

“kaashi and i are seeing a movie around 7, but next time, man, i promise.” bokuto says, his hand on his neck, apologetic, almost.

another nod — that’s fine, too.

well, at least now, sakusa couldn’t say he didn’t try to socialize more. it’s the preferable outcome for him anyway, he’s better going off on it alone.

atsumu’s voice tears him away from his thoughts, loud and too cheerful for someone who just performed 4 diving laps, “i could go with ya, omi!”

and out of instinct, he replies “no, thank you.”

his blond teammate looks like he’s gonna say something after his response but you speak before he gets the chance to.

“well, i don’t mind coming, omi.” you say, and he blinks - how long have you been there?

there’s a knot in his stomach. “tonight?”

(he thinks, please say no, please say no, please say no.)

you nod at him, “it’s gonna be snowing so some ramen would be perfect.”

he nods at you - unable to say anything else, really - and he clears his throat, looking at atsumu, who he’s now just been really appreciative of for existing all of a sudden.

“then it will be you, me, and miya?” he asks, and he wants to keep his voice quiet now, untrusting of it.

(in the corner of his eye, he sees hinata step on atsumu’s foot and he goes “ow, whaddya do that for!” bokuto gives him a look, similar to the one hinata has, and atsumu catches on.)

sakusa gives the three of them a warning look, begging, actually begging, anyone who’d listen in that silly head of his for them not to do anything stupid.

“sorry man,” atsumu flashes him a grin, and he feels his knees go weak. “i forgot i had some plans tonight, i don’t think i’ll be able to go.”

lord, forgive sakusa kiyoomi for he’s gonna kill somebody.

he wants to say something, but before he could, you beat him to it.

“perfect.” you smile, “more for us then. right, omi?”

sakusa swallows the lump in his throat, and gives you a short nod, “yeah.”

you gather your things in your hand, “i’ll come over to your place, then?”

(words that make his knees feel even weaker.)

another nod. “yes, that’s fine.”

and he regains his composure, the worst of it over, but before you turn to leave, you flash him another one of your smiles, and he wishes you would just go so he can feel his pulse return to normal again.

“it’s a date.” you say, and you’re out the door.

sakusa’s face has a whisper of a light pinkishness to it and unable to think about it too much, he blames it on the open window letting the cold in.

the second the door closes, the locker room erupts in cheers, “way to go, omi!” “you’re going on a date!” and “it’s finally happening!”

there’s a knot in his stomach, and atsumu claps him on his back.

he rolls his eyes at the group, shaking his head as he whispers something along the lines of “whatever” or “its not a big deal.”

but his face feels hot and his pulse feels like its drumming against his skin, but, he can blame that on the cold too.

the sun goes down quicker than sakusa hoped it would, it’s 6:47pm now and you’ll be arriving in no later than 13 minutes.

he takes a good look at his apartment, ransacked and messy, the complete opposite of its usual state.

there’s a knock on his door and he feels his heart beat out of his chest at the sound.

he opens it with a fervor, “i asked you to come 30 minutes ago.”

“it’s a 30 minute walk.” behind the door is atsumu, sheepish smile on his face, hands shoved into his pockets as he pushes past the brunette and into the apartment.

“woah, this place is a mess.” atsumu says aloud, even him surprised at the disarray.

“i didn’t know what to wear.” sakusa admits, and he feels embarrassment course through his skin.

“i’ll say.” the blond replies, but he doesn’t tease. “you alright, omi?”

sakusa sighs – he really isn’t. his nerves are killing him and there’s an intense nervousness that pools in his belly. you make him nervous, did you know that?

“maybe i should cancel.” he says, and he looks at himself in the mirror again — coat, scarf, gloves, check, check, check.

“what? don’t do that.” atsumu shakes his head, “it’s five minutes ‘til 7.”

he’s probably right, sakusa thinks, you’re probably on your way by now, and even with the chilling weather outside, he feels way too hot for his own good.

he takes off his gloves to alleviate some of the warmth, placing it on his dresser as he paces.

“you’re an asshole, right?” sakusa says suddenly, “punch me in the face, take me to the ER, and i will reschedule whatever this night is to when i’m readier.”

(he doesn’t think he’ll ever be ready, to be honest.)

“even if i do really want to punch you in the face right now, that is so not gonna happen.”

“being your friend is useless to me.”

“yet, i’m the one you called over here.”

the doorbell rings and the both of them freeze in their places, sakusa looks over to the clock and how is it 7 already? and must you be on time for everything?

you’re already here and his place is a mess and atsumu freaking miya is standing in the middle of his apartment.

he says the first thing he can think of, “hide.”

atsumu looks at him, “what?”

he insists, “hide now.”

“are ya nuts? your apartment is a shoebox, where the hell am i hiding in here?” atsumu shakes his head, and he follows sakusa’s eyes in response as he tilts his body to look over to the bed.

“no fuckin way, nuh uh.” he backs away, “i am not hiding under there.”

the doorbell rings again and atsumu feels the nerves getting to him too.

“please. i’ll owe you.”

and atsumu wants to say no - really, he does - he’s not some teenager caught with his pants down and has to be stashed away under a bed, but sakusa looks at him in a way that makes him unrecognizable.

sakusa may not know it, but everyone can tell, every single one of them on the team knows, just how much this means to him.

(after all, the only people in msby black jackals who don’t know that sakusa likes you are sakusa and you.)

so he relents, and he gets on his knees near the bed before he scurries off under it. “you so owe me for this.”

sakusa feels embarassed – ashamed, really. he’s actually invested in this - in this date, and he wishes he was kidding, but he’s not, and he hates it.

he opens the door, and you’re there, and it’s always nice to see you outside of work.

“hi.” he says, and he doesn’t know what else to say.

“hi.” you say back, and for a second, it’s quiet.

another second passes, “can i come in?”

and he wants to kick himself, “yes. of course.”

“it’s freezing tonight.” you make polite small talk, “good thing i wore my coat.”

“it looks nice.” he nods, and he is grateful you don’t say anything about the mess of his apartment. it takes him another beat to realize what he said, and he feels embarrassed, although he doesn’t know why, so he follows up, “the coat.”

he wants to hit himself. he sounds like he’s just talking about the coat.

“you as well.” he says again. “not just the coat, i meant to say. you and the coat are nice looking. both of you.” he wants to stop talking – why is he still talking?

he looks at you, “where’d you - uh - buy it?”

great, now he sounds like he wants to take the fucking coat.

there’s a sound almost like snickering coming from under the bed but before you could look over to it sakusa clears his throat again.

“i’m ready to go,” he says suddenly, “are you?”

you haven’t been able to get a word in all night it seems, but it makes you smile - amused, and you nod, “yes.”

the night starts off okay, it’s quiet though, and he thinks, are dates supposed to be quiet?

“you okay there, omi?” you break the silence, and he wonders if you can tell what he’s been thinking.

“yeah.” a short reply, “just cold.”

you nod, “ah.”

in an effort to keep the conversation going, and the sudden realization that he may be the reason why it’s such a quiet evening, he looks to the side, and tells you, as the two of you walk the pavement to the train station:

“i forgot my gloves.”

there’s a pink hue on his ears, and he’s grateful you don’t tease him about it.

you stop walking for a moment, so he stops too.

he watches you as you work, taking the left glove on your hand off and he says nothing when you ask him to give you his left hand.

“here.” you slip on your left glove on his left hand, and it’s a snug fit, but it is warm.

then you say, “do you mind?”

and he doesn’t know what you’re talking about until you put your - now, ungloved - left hand to his -also, ungloved - right hand. fingers interlacing.

“this way, it’ll stay warm, don’t you think?”

he doesn’t trust his voice and he’s more grateful for the snow now as he finds it being his excuse for how red his ears are getting. he can only nod his head, keeping his nose tucked in under his scarf.

his lips tremble and he’s not so sure if it’s from the cold or from you.

sakusa doesn’t gamble. he doesn’t like the risks of it all. he always feels there’s always gonna be too much to lose rather than gaining anything beneficial for him.

so no – there are very little things in the world he cares enough about for him to risk anything for.

“better?” you say, and he tries harder to focus on your voice rather than your warm hand.

“yes.”

you smile and he thinks it’s really nice. “so, why was atsumu under your bed?”

his face feels hot now, his first instinct to deny that there ever was any man named atsumu under his bed, but he knows that look you’re giving him, and he knows it would be pointless to lie.

still, he doesn’t know what to say to you.

“omi?”

but then again, he never knows what to say to you.

“… i asked him to come help me get ready.”

you tilt your head, “get ready for?”

the silence becomes your answer and sakusa feels his face burn. it feels like embarrassment – but it also feels like something else.

“oh.”

and unexpectedly, you laugh, and when he hears it, for the first time all evening, his nerves finally cool on him, and he laughs too.

you bump your shoulders with his, playful, “if it helps to know, i was nervous too.”

“because of me?” he doesn’t really believe you, he doesn’t think anything can make someone like you nervous, but you, on the other hand, make him nervous all the time.

“well, you don’t really talk to me at work,” you shrug, your voice sounding teasing, “i didn’t think you liked me all that much, to be honest.”

“sorry.” he says in quiet laughter, and he can’t bring himself to look at you.

you look at him though, and he wishes that you wouldn’t. he can hear the smile in your voice still, “for what?”

“for this shitty date.”

that makes you laugh even more and he feels like it’s gonna make him fall over.

“well, we haven’t even gotten to the restaurant yet so jury’s still out on whether it’s shitty or not.” you squeeze his hand, teasing.

(and he rolls his eyes, nerves gone, and feeling much better now that he’s talking to you.)

you are probably the riskiest person he’s ever met. you put everything on the line.

by all things considered, he should stay far, far away from you — you jeopardize it all, you could take all he’s ever worked for away.

but everytime you talk to him, everytime you touch him, everytime you say his name or bring him coffee — there is a feeling in his stomach that envelops his entire body and the corner he’s been backed into doesn’t feel as cold or as confining.

you smile at him and he wants it all: he wants to wake up next to you, he wants to fall asleep and you’re the last person he sees, he wants to drive you to work and he wants you to come home with him after the day is over.

“besides,” you say, and the snow may be cold, but his face feels warm.

your voice is soft, “you can just keep taking me on them until we get it right.”

the risk is you could take everything he’s ever worked for, his game, his career, his reputation, his name. but you smile at him and your hand is warm against his and your laugh feels like it’s gonna make him fall over, and he thinks, okay — take it all, it’s already yours anyway.

[darknight3904]

All Too Well

Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Summary: After meeting Joel one late night at a bar you launch into a whirlwind romance with him. But, between a nasty breakup and the end of the world, you're left with nothing but your thoughts of the past and the way they haunt you all too well.

Warnings: 18+ Mature themes including: language, loss of virginity sexual references, SA (Not by Joel), Animal death, starvation.

Based on the song by Taylor Swift.

Word Count: 6.5k

Series Masterlist / Main Masterlist

Winter 2023

Jackson was a town that was almost too good to be true. You had stumbled upon it nearly 7 years ago after fleeing in the middle of the night from a band of men that had captured you. Your sanctuary was just getting started then, but the group that was working there, welcomed you with open arms and as many supplies as they could spare.

It was your own little slice of paradise in this post-apocalyptic world you were stuck in. Away from FEDRA's iron fist and the horrors that evil people inflicted on others, most days you felt like you were living the life you used to back in 2003.

Of course, some things were different now. The TV in the corner of your living room was useless and most of your meals were communal in the mess hall. But, you loved it all anyway, glad to be away from the harsh world that lay outside the walls.

Even when you were assigned to clean out the horse stables, you loved your community. Jackson was your perfect little universe, undisturbed by the past and-

"Oh, shit...Joel?"

May 2003

College finals were the two scariest words one could say to you right now. Luckily for you, you had managed to somehow pass all of them this semester. Yes, you had somehow even managed an 80 on your biology exam, you still weren't quite sure how that happened. Maybe those 3am nights poured over your books did something.

"We should celebrate tonight." Your friend, Amelia suggested from her spot on the couch

"I was thinking about ordering a pizza." You sigh as you try to work out in your mind how much you have in your bank account. Perhaps you even had enough for some wings too.

"Not like that." She scoffs, " I meant we dress up real slutty and hit some bars. Get some guys to buy us drinks."

"I wanted to watch a movie tonight though." You sigh, thinking of the Blockbuster down the road. The second X-Men movie had come out a few weeks ago and you were dying to see Hugh Jackman on your screen again.

"You can spend the rest of your life as a grandma watching movies. You're only hot once." Amelia laughs

"But-"

"No buts. Your tits are gonna be at your waist one day and you'll thank me for this." Amelia declares before skipping off to her room, mumbling about which top she'd wear.

You sigh as you watch her door close. Amelia Caddel hadn't been your first choice for sharing an off campus apartment. Afterall, she was the opposite of you in so many ways. But, Miss Life of the Party had a steady deposit of allowance in her account from mommy and daddy, meaning she never missed rent, an important factor in a roomate.

"Guess you're spending the night alone." You sigh, looking down at your cat, Loki who purred, clearly wanting a treat or perhaps another heaping bowl of kibble.

Amelia fussed with your hair as the two of you entered your first bar.

"How're you going to pick up a guy if he can't even see your eyes?" She laughs

The stuffy air and the loud music, followed by a group of frat boys cheering for someone, reminded you why you never went out.

You watched with a sigh as she sought out the closest mid twenties guy she could wrestle a few drinks out of. You trailed behind, fidgeting with the skimpy black mini dress she had coaxed you into.

You'd have to hand it to Amelia, you certainly looked hot in it.

The feel of a stranger bumping into you and the sharp scent of aftershave filled your nose, and then big hands were wrapping around your waist, keeping you from stumbling.

"Shit sorry, hon." His Texan accent sent a small shiver down your spine.

"It's fine." You mumble, jumping away from the stranger's arms.

"Tommy, let's go! Quit flirtin' with the college girls!"

The man, Tommy, mumbles another apology to you before disappearing further into the bar, in search of whoever called for him.

Joel watched as his younger brother "accidentally" bumped into some silly college girl who seemed out of her element. Joel couldn't lie, it was something his brain might've come up with if he wasn't so damn tired from today's work. When was laying concrete going to get easier?

The younger Miller brother, who hadn't succumbed to back pain just yet, whispered some false apology in the girl's ears as she jumped away from him.

Joel called for him, he couldn't let Tommy terrorize some poor twenty-something girl who looked like a deer in the headlights under his brother's gaze.

"You're getting too old to be after college kids." Joel chastizes as he sits beside Tommy at the bar.

"Oh c'mon." Tommy scoffs as he orders a beer for himself and Joel.

"You're thirty, you're not some mid-twenties loser anymore." Joel points out.

"You're no fun, Joel," Tommy says with a roll of his eyes

Joel wanted to go home. He'd wanted to go home hours ago but Tommy had dragged him out after they finally finished working on their latest project, the new local Subway was nicely constructed by the Miller brothers.

Yet, here he sat, a few hours later, Two and a half beers deep, listening to Tommy try his hand at karaoke. Joel was pretty sure his ears were bleeding as his eyes scanned the bar. Most of the patrons were so drunk, they cheered Tommy on.

Joel found his eyes settling on the girl Tommy had "bumped" into earlier. She was still alone, sat across the room at a high-top table, sipping at some fruity drink. Pretty red heels were linked on the footrest of the barstool and Joel watched as she fumbled with her purse, looking for something with a deep frown across her pretty features.

If Joel didn't have a 13-year-old waiting on him back home, he might have slipped across the bar and sweet talked his way into this girl's arms. But the thought of Sarah back home, watching TV with Mrs. Addler had his ass glued to his barstool.

Instead, he observes as you finally find your phone and make a call. He watches as your features droop in disappointment as you yell over Tommy's singing to whoever was on the other end. Joel watched with a bit of amusement as you nearly fell off the stool when you went to stand up, you must've forgotten you linked those heels onto the footrest.

Joel let out a grumble of disappointment as Tommy launched into the beginning of Don't Stop Believin' by Journey. Why had he been given the world's most annoying little brother?

Joel's eyes turn back to the mystery girl and her delicate red heels just as some frat guy from Alpha Delta- who fuckin' cares, slings an arm around her waist, hand dipping too close to the hem of her skirt for Joel to be comfortable with.

As if he's on autopilot, Joel finds himself crossing the bar in long strides, ready to put a stop to whatever might come next.

"I don't see your friend now." The guy laughs as you shift your weight from foot to foot, clearly uncomfortable.

Joel hears you mumble something about wanting to go home.

"I'll give you a ride."

The guy's sleazy tone has Joel cringing as he approaches. DId anyone teach these kids manners?

"Why don't you give the lady some space?" Joel suggests boldy

Alpha-Delta-Chad turns around to meet Joel's gaze, not releasing you just yet as he scoffs,

"Who the fuck are you? Her dad?"

"Just a concerned stranger." Joel nods to you in greeting, "She doesn't seem too comfortable with you, kid. Give her some room."

"How would you even know old man?" The boy asks, "You're like forty!"

Ouch. Joel was 35. Did he really look 40? Already?

"Let her go," Joel says, his voice deepening a bit

The frat boy's eyes scan Joel's figure. Either he decides you're not worth it, or that he'd lose the fight because before Joel knows it he's letting you go and murmuring another curse at Joel.

"Thank you." You breathe a sigh of relief, and a small smile graces your pretty face as Joel nods.

"You're welcome, sweetheart."

The name slips out of Joel's mouth before he can stop it and he watches in amusement as you blink away in embarrassment.

Your eyes roam across his frame and Joel can't quite place the look on your face as you...size him up?

"Could you um...walk me to the bus stop? I'd go myself but I'm worried that guy might be waiting for me outside." You ask

Joel wants to say no. He wants to stay tucked away in the bar, sipping his beer, and hope Tommy accidentally swallows the microphone he's singing into. Yet, one look into your sad, and definitely drunk eyes has him folding.

"Sure, I'll walk ya."

A warm breeze blows through the air as your savior is beside you at the bus stop. He'd insisted on waiting beside you until the bus showed up, saying something about having a daughter back home and it not being right to leave you alone out here.

"So...what's your name?" You ask, your drunk mind disliked silences.

"Joel. Joel Miller." He says, "You?"

You softly say your name, shy under his gaze.

Maybe its the three margaritas but the man next to you is hot. Short brown curly hair with dark eyes to match. Not to mention the splatter of facial hair and mustache he seemed to pull off so effortlessly. He was definitely much older than you, at least over ten years your senior. But, he was attractive in the ways all the college boys in your classes weren't.

Your eyes raked over tanned arms, toned perfectly from whatever he did to get them. You could tell he was sporting a handsome dad bod under the plain blue t-shirt on his frame. You'd never been one for a rippling six-pack, a man who'd eat pizza and ice cream with you was always going to be attractive than one who spent his days drinking protein shakes and eating eggs for "gains". Joel seemed like a guy who'd be into a binge-watch of every Star Wars movie and indulge with you in an impulsive 2am Domino's order.

"Where the hell is this bus at?"

His deep voice had you snapping from your drunken daydream of pizza and dad bods.

"Oh um..."

You're not quite sure where the bus is. Hopefully, it'd show soon. Your legs felt like a newborn deer's, no way would you be able to walk the seven and a half miles back to your apartment like this.

"Joel!"

Another voice has you and your new companion turning your heads. Another man, somehow a bit familiar in your drunk brain is approaching.

"What're you doin' man? You missed my singing."

"I heard enough." Joel huffs in annoyance

Oh, so this was the guy who was badly singing to Brittney Spears and Journey. He looked a bit more familiar though...this was the dude that had bumped into your earlier!

"Now if I'm too old to be goin' after college girls, then you're definitely too old, brother."

"I'm not...Not goin' after anyone. I'm waiting for the bus with her. Some creep was hitting on her at the bar, I'm keeping her safe." Joel groans at this man's comment.

So he wasn't interested? You felt your heart sink a bit. Of course, he wasn't interested. He had a kid for crying out loud.

Oh god, what if he had a wife? Were you daydreaming about a married man?

Your eyes jump to his left hand.

Ringless.

Well, at least you weren't fantasizing about being a homewrecker.

"The bus? It's past midnight. The bus stops running at 11:30." The new guy says, looking at his watch.

"Oh...um. I'll just go then." You say, standing up on unsteady legs. Looks like you're walking. You didn't have the money for a cab, so your legs were just going to have to tough this one out.

"Go? Go where?" Joel's friend scoffs

You ignore him, he's so weird.

"Tommy, stop it." Joel scolds

He sounds like such a dad as you laugh to yourself while smoothing your dress out.

"Do you want us to give you a ride?" Joel asks, standing up next to you

"No, I can manage the walk." You brush him off, trying to ignore the way he's so tall all of a sudden.

You were even wearing heels and he was bigger than you!

"I can call a cab," Joel suggests, watching the way your ankle nearly twists when you take a step.

"I don't have any money for one." You whimper, as the pain in your ankle shoots up your leg.

Fuck these heels. Fuck Amelia for ditching you for another bar. Fuck Joel had his stupid dad bod and tanned skin. Fuck the stupidly attractive mustache on his stupidly attractive face.

This always happened when you were drunk. First, your legs turned into literal Jello and then you'd get all weepy about nothing. At least you'd have seven miles to cry your eyes out. Hopefully, Loki would let you hold him when you got home.

"Let me give you a ride. Do you live on campus?" Joel asks his eyes widening at the tears that dribble down your face.

"I'm just gonna walk." You mumble and bush past him, forcing your legs into an unsteady match.

"That's like...an 8-mile walk," Tommy says from behind you, estimating the distance between here and the college.

"Actually seven and a half." You sass, not interested in his comments or his stupid aftershave that invaded your nose as you walked past him.

You're not entirely sure how you ended up here, in the back seat of a pick up truck while Joel drove you home. You mumbled your address to him and he'd somehow known immediately where you were living.

Hopefully, you weren't going to end up dead in a ditch tonight.

Joel watched as you rested your head against the window. He'd walked you to his truck after you got a few feet away from him before sitting down on the curb, tears running down your pretty face, mumbling something about a cat.

"Fuckin' college girls." Tommy had mumbled as he helped Joel buckle you into your seat

"Let's just get her home," Joel said

"Yeah before she turns the waterworks back on." Tommy sighed

Joel drives towards the shitty apartments they rent to college kids. Two blocks away he had once been working in a fancy new condo building, putting up drywall and laying flooring. There'd been talk about developing your area as well, but six months later the apartments of Oliver Avenue were still as shitty as ever.

Joel guaranteed you were getting ripped off by your landlord. Probably paying too much for someplace that had thin walls and bad heating. Sure enough, he was right, as he parked his trunk in front of a building that badly needed a makeover.

"Stay here." He tells Tommy who seems to be a few moments away from falling asleep in the passenger seat.

Joel pulls you from the backseat, shoving Sarah's soccer ball back under the seat when it rolls out and tries to escape.

"Alright, what floor?" Joel asks as you stand beside him, tears finally dried up.

You wordlessly begin to plod your way up the steps and murmur what sounds like a five to him.

Joel makes sure you get your door open and watches as a black cat greets you as you push the door open.

"Hi, baby." You coo at the cat, scooping him up. "Did you miss me?"

Joel feels his heart speed up as you sweet-talk your pet. He tries to banish the idea of you talking to him like that, carding your hands through his hair, rather than this little black cat with a green collar and golden bell around his neck.

"Thank you, Joel." You say as you spin around to face him

"No problem." He hums, "Glad I was able to help."

You smile at him as your damn cat meows loudly, breaking the trance you had on him.

"Goodnight, sweetheart."

"Goodnight, Joel."

July 2003

The fourth of July was serious business in Austin. From mega barbeques to fireworks that put Magic Kingdom to shame, your sleepy little college town was transformed for America's birthday.

A much-needed breeze flows through the park as you sit on the blanket you'd found shoved at the back of your closet. Summer was brutal this year, and you were sure that the Texas heat wasn't making the wait for fireworks any easier.

Your parents had invited you back home to Pittsburgh this summer. But, you found yourself more interested in staying put in Austin. Your sleepy suburb town back home would always be there, no sense in spending your summer cooped up in your childhood room. At least here you could go out whenever you wanted.

"Dad, let's go! All the good spots are going to be taken!!"

A young girl's voice drifts across the park as you turn to watch her pull what must be her father along.

"Hold on, Sarah! You're gonna make me drop all this."

"Move faster then!"

Well, shit.

Joel Miller, the savior of drunk college girls, was here in the park, walking towards you.

Your eyes widen as you take him in. At least you know it wasn't just the alcohol talking, Joel Miller was just as devastatingly good-looking now as he was a month and a half ago when he drove you home from the bar.

"H-Hi." You awkwardly stammer as he passes by you, arms full with a small cooler and a big blanket.

"Hello." He says, quickly

The double take he does is almost comical as he looks at you.

"Sarah!" He calls after the girl, "Come back here!"

"Didn't think I'd ever see you again." You smile, standing up from your own spot

"Well, I do live around here." He says with a lopsided smile that makes him look a bit more boyish.

The girl, Sarah, returns to her father's side.

"Hi." She says a bit flatly, clearly annoyed her father has stopped his march across the park to what she had deemed the perfect spot.

"Hello." You greeted her, with a soft smile.

She was so cute, with dark curly hair and black shorts paired with a pretty green and blue t-shirt. Sparkly sandals caught your eye as she stepped a bit closer to Joel, looking up at him for an explanation.

Joel introduces you to her, "I helped her out a month ago, got her home safe."

You're beyond elated he's standing in front of you again. For a little bit you swore he was a hallucination you'd dreamt up in a drunken haze. A handsome Texan man who'd driven you home safely after rescuing you from some sleaze. Amelia had scolded you for hours when she found out you hadn't gotten his number.

"Super safe." You smile at him.

Joel feels a nervous sweat break out on his forehead. Here he was with his daughter ready to watch their fireworks like they always did each year and he was flirting with a girl like he was 17 again. He'd be lying if you weren't on his mind regularly. The way you'd been dressed that night haunted him at night as he lay in bed, your sweet voice filled his ears as he went about his days. He'd wondered if you only used that tone for your cat.

"You two want to sit with me? I'm not sure if these are the best seats in the house but I do have some popcorn I can share..." You trail off, giving a smile to Sarah who enthusiastically agrees at the idea of free food.

Joel settles next to you as Sarah talks your ears off about soccer practices and the pool party Joel took her to a few weeks ago. He watches as you listen intently to his daughter's words. So rarely does a woman he's interested in take time to talk to Sarah. Yet, here you were, in college and interacting with his daughter better than most grown women did.

"So how old are you?"

Joel nudges Sarah with his shoe, doesn't she know that's a rude question? He could've sworn he taught her better.

"I'm 23. 24 this August." You say

"Wow," Sarah says

You turn away for a moment, reaching for the bag of popcorn that sits behind you. Joel's eyes widen as he watches Sarah silently mouth to him,

"She's so old!"

If you were old, did that mean he was ancient? God, how old did his daughter view him as? He could've sworn 35 wasn't that bad. Maybe it was though...

"So, 23. You're graduating soon then, yeah?" Joel asked

"I wish." You sigh, "I took a gap year after high school, and then just couldn't find the right major for a bit. I'm technically on track to become a Physician Assistant but I dunno if it's right for me."

Joel nods, he knows the feeling, not knowing if what you're doing is right. He'd felt that way when Sarah was born, and then when her mother left them, and then every time Sarah was hurt or crying, or just not perfectly happy, Joel felt that way, unsure of himself.

"You'd make a great PA, Sweetheart." Joel genuinely says, placing a hand over yours

"Thanks." You say a bit flustered at the physical contact.

"Gross," Sarah comments at what's unfolding before her eyes.

"You're gross." Joel counters, not missing a beat to tease her.

Sarah sticks her tongue out at him in retaliation, and Joel does the same.

You spend the rest of your summer with the Millers. In between public pool trips, and catching fireflies in the backyard, you somehow end up entangled with Joel. Staying up on the couch beside him, watching movie after movie when Sarah drifted off into dreamland up in her bed.

Before you know it, Joel is picking you up for dates and meeting you at coffee shops to let you talk his ears off about whatever book you've picked up for the week.

You let Joel take your virginity on a humid August night. After sending Sarah off to her friend's house you let him pull you into his room and under the sheets.

Breathless and sweaty you rest your head on his chest.

"You okay?" Joel asks quietly, running a hand up and down your back

"Mmhm." You sigh dreamily

"Didn't hurt you or nothin'?" He asks

"I'm okay, Joel." You laugh

"Just checking." He mumbles

Joel looks a bit out of place as he sits on your couch. Sarah had a week of soccer camp and the two of you decided to spend it together. Loki jumps up on the cushion beside Joel and lets out a loud meow.

"Pet him." You suggest with a shrug

"He doesn't even like me." Joel huffs staring into your cats eyes

"You nearly sat on him the first time you were here." You remind Joel of his previous crime from a week ago.

"I thought he was a throw pillow." Joel defends himself, motioning to the many pillows you and Amelia had scattered around the apartment.

"You thought I had a green-eyed pillow that meowed?"

"I dunno what you women are into, you're all so confusing."

You let out a scoff before plopping down on the couch next to him, Loki climbing into your lap and purring as you scratch behind his ears.

"The only confusing one here is you, Joel Miller."

Tommy isn't as bad as you thought he was.

Scratch that, he's fantastic, pulling out old photos of Joel from over the years. You nearly piss yourself though when he whips out an old family album. A nine-year-old Joel stares back at you as you look at an old photo of him playing tee-ball.

"Look how cute you were!" You gasp as you run your fingers across the photograph

"Joel Miller, star tee-ball player!" Tommy teases his big brother.

You smile as you watch Joel's face turn red as you take in even more photographs of him as a kid, you even see his 10th-grade photo, yes the one where he has braces and the worst case of acne known to mankind.

By the time the Texas heat begins to ease off and the leaves begin to change colors, you're head over heels in love with Joel Miller. From the way his eyes crinkle when he smiles, to the way he'd dance with you in the dead of the night while the refrigerator door hung open, the light reflecting off your bodies as you laughed in his arms.

Three months, such a short time, and yet so much had happened. You tried to focus on the Anatomy lesson your professor was talking about in front of you yet you found your mind occupied with something else. It was as if you had been possessed, nothing but Joel filled your mind as you scribbled your notes onto your notebook. Anatomy class be damned, you were going to go mad thinking of him like this.

Your birthday, August 29th rolled around faster than you thought it would. You hadn't seen Joel all week. Between your classes, Sarah's soccer and school, and Joel's contracting, you had only time to talk to him briefly on the phone.

You had reached out to Joel earlier today to invite him to a small birthday party Amelia had insisted on. Nothing special, just some pizza and cupcakes, a cheap beer or two.

But now, it was going on 10:30 and Joel was nothing but a whisper in the wind. Sadness weighed on your chest as you watched the front door, hoping for a knock that would signal his arrival.

"Hey...I think we should just go to bed..."Amelia suggests softly from her spot next to you.

"No, he's coming." You mumble sadly tears tickling your waterline,

You stare at the last cupcake that sits on the coffee table. It was meant to be for Joel. You had scooped it out of the box thinking about how nice the icing looked on it. You had wanted him to have the best one in the box, even if that meant your own was a little lopsided and missing sprinkles.

Amelia pulls you into her side, letting you rest your head on her shoulder. She gently wraps her arm around you and quietly says,

"It's supposed to be fun, turning 24..."

September 2003

Three days pass before you hear from Joel again. His voice on the other end of the phone call is paralyzing as your world comes crashing down. The phone beeps as the call ends and you stand at your kitchen counter in shock, shocked that he's ending it all like this, with a phone call.

"If we had been closer in age, maybe it would've been fine."

His words bounce around in your mind as you slam your phone down on the counter. Loki jumps from his spot on the windowsill meowing as you cross the room quickly.

You pulled your covers over your head, blocking out the world as you heard Amelia return from her ethics class.

"If we had been closer in age, maybe it would've been fine."

God, that made you want to die. What did he even think of you? That you were some wide-eyed college kid who just existed in limbo for him?

You spend the next week in bed, plagued with tears and anger as you curse Joel out at least 1000 times a day. The knock at your door and Amelia entering your room with a box has you startled.

"What's this?" You sniff

"UPS guy just left it at our front door." She says before setting it on the bed and leaving you again.

You cut the box open and find your things inside it. Little things you'd left at Joel's over the summer. Hair ties, a brush, deodorant, t-shirts, and sweaters, even a photograph of you, Sarah, and him at the aquarium is nestled between the pages of a book you kept on his nightstand to read to him before the two of you dozed off. The box holds your entire relationship as you dump it out on your bed.

The scent of Joel, masculine and inviting clings to your belongings just like the way it clings to your heart.

Your hands shift through the items again, the scarf you wore to Tommy's house is missing. You had left it there and Joel had promised to return it to you.

"Who wears a scarf in Texas?" Joel snorts

"I do! And you better give it back, Miller." You groan

"I'll get it to you, sweetheart. Don't worry about it."

You wonder what has become of your scarf now. Perhaps it's sitting in a drawer in his room, nestled among his belongings, looking horribly out of place. Or maybe it's stuck in his truck, shoved under the seats under the pretense that it would make its way back to you one day.

You wonder what has become of Joel now. Perhaps he's lying in his own bed right now, thinking of you, your scarf wrapped around his hands, smelling of you and all his failures.

You wonder if this love affair bruised him the way it did you.

God, you had so many regrets.

December 2003

Cold air fills your lungs as your feet ache beneath you. Snow gently fell down as you sighed quietly. The walk into your hometown was no joke. The shitty beater car you'd stolen had died about 50 miles ago, leaving you vulnerable and scared.

Loki meowed from his crate as you quietly walked along. You shushed him and dropped a few treats behind the bars of the crate. He was going to need food soon if you intended to stay alive, your traveling companion wasn't known for holding his tongue when it came to hunger. The last thing you needed was to have an infected try to kill you because of your pet.

It had been nearly 5 days on the road now. and You'd managed to drive from Austin to Pittsburgh all on your own armed with a shotgun and a map you'd found in the glove compartment.

The past few months had been spent in Joel's basement. After things started going south outside your apartment building, you stuffed Loki into his carrier and filled a two big duffle bags with food and clothes for you and supplies for your cat before managing to somehow sneak into the parking deck and jump into your car. Amelia had never returned from her boyfriends house that night. You knew you couldn't go looking for her though, his home was nearly 25 miles away while Joel's was only 10.

It was mid-morning on September 27th when you reached Joel's place. The other neighborhood homes were empty and you nearly threw up at the sight of Mrs. Adler's mother lying face down on the driveway.

Your heart sinks when you discover Joel and Sarah are already gone. You hadn't expected them to be here yet, a part of you had hoped they'd be. It was Joel's birthday yesterday, you wondered how he'd spent his last normal day. Knowing him, he'd probably been at work all day.

You barricade the doors before slipping into the basement. Joel had spent time finishing it so it was nice for Sarah's sleepovers. You let Loki out before returning upstairs to bring down every nonperishable food item the home had to offer.

And so, there you sat with your cat, in your ex's basement, willing for him to magically appear and tell you everything was going to be okay.

March 2017

The Pittsburgh QZ was fucked. Royally fucked. The loud explosion from some truck filled your ears as you zipped your backpack shut. Loki let out a meow of protest as he disappeared in your bag. He was nearly 15 and his attitude about backpack travel wasn't improving.

You stick to the back alleys as you work towards finding an out. A decent-sized hole in a fence catches your eye and you take your chances, better than getting blown up by the Fireflies or FEDRA.

You're about 4 miles away from the carnage when a sizeable group catches your eye. They must've gotten out just like you.

A man, David, shares a can of flavorless chili with you and you sit on the ground beside him. But, the more you listen to him talk, you can't help but think he's a total nutcase. You thank him for the chili and the 8 cans of chicken noodle soup he's shared with you and decline his offer to join the group.

"We have so much to offer." He says in a soft voice, gesturing to the people scattered around eating and talking amongst themselves.

"I'll stick to just him, thanks though." You say petting Loki's head as you pull him from your backpack to place the cans of food inside.

"Suit yourself."

April 2017

You had dozed off. A rookie mistake to make in the apocalypse.

They had been on you before you knew what was happening. With nothing but a knife to your name to protect yourself, you were hopelessly outgunned.

"Look at what we have here." A deep voice booms, "A girl wondering in my woods, must be my lucky day."

A smelly man stands in front of you, and about 8 other men are circled around you. You squeeze your eyes shut as he lets a dirty finger trail over your face.

"How pretty."

A loud hiss cuts his next sentence. Loki, you brave boy, has climbed out of your backpack where he had been taking a nap. His back has hunched up and you don't miss the way his dark black fur is bristling in the low light of the sun disappearing behind the trees.

You aren't even able to try to arrange a deal for your baby as the man pulls a large knife from his belt and carelessly throws it at your cat.

A horrible screech from Loki fills your ears as the man coos at you and tells you it'll all be okay.

"We've got dinner boys!" The man who has killed your only friend in the whole world exclaims.

Your eyes slam shut as red blood begins to seep into the fabric of your backpack. The man says something about being a provider but you're too focused on choking back the tears that are forming in your eyes.

Hours later, you're tied to a tree stump, your arms behind your back. Your captors present you with a warm soup of sorts. Canned carrots and potatoes float in a clear broth but it's what sits in the center of the bowl that turns your stomach. What's left of your Loki is now being devoured by the men.

You can't do it. You had been starving, unable to catch anything for days. but you can't do it.

"Fine, don't eat." The leader and cat killer huffs as he runs his hands across your chest in an unpleasant matter, "You're going to wish you had though when we're done with you."

June 2017

The moon is your only light as you steal away into the night. Your heart is pounding but you can't or rather won't look back.

Your escape is credited to a man named Adam. He had always been softer to you than the rest. Less brutal than the others when he bent you over a tree stump and forced himself into your unwilling body, cooing in your ears about how good you felt even though you were dry.

Softer and easy to fool when you batted your eyelashes at him so he'd give you a second serving of the deer they'd killed. Gentle when he cleaned whatever wounds the others inflicted on you for their sick pleasure.

Tonight, you had used his softness against him. Crying and whimpering when he tied you to a tree, saying the restraints were too tight. He'd of course taken pity on you and loosened them before kissing your forehead and walking off to sleep.

It had been easy to slip out of the ropes thanks to Adam. You stole his backpack and stuffed it with as much deer jerky as you could get your hands on before snatching a gun off Adam's unknowing form.

Now, you were stumbling through the night, hoping to put as much distance between you and the men as possible.

Nearly three weeks had passed and you were still somehow free. The men hadn't found you and you were deep into the wilderness. Your freedom was something you had yearned for since the moment Loki had died. Yet, here you were, starving and wasting away because you couldn't kill anything to eat.

You drag your body into an old concrete building that was being used to control some form of dam. You rested your head on your backpack, thinking of how far you'd come.

Strangely though, you thought of your past. Fuzzy images of a college classroom came into your brain. Amelia's long blonde hair and the way she'd style it perfectly each day. Texas summers, filled with heat and perfectly seasoned barbeque.

What you wouldn't do for a big plate of ribs right now.

And then the curly hair of a little girl is dancing around your mind. Her warm laughter fills your mind as you think of Sarah Miller. With her sparkle filled sandals and her strange interest in gore filled horror films. You wondered if she was still out there somewhere. Perhaps stuck in some QZ with Joel.

Joel.

You think about Joel. You're sure you've thought of him more in the past three months than you did your whole relationship. Every night when one of your captors, or sometimes multiples had you every which way, you'd try to think about other things. Those other things often divulged into Joel and how gentle he'd been with you. Oh, how you missed his warm arms and soft southern twang. Hou you yearned for him even now. Your only real relationship experience was something you just couldn't let go.

When you were finally found by Maria, you were nearly ready for death. Brain filled with delusional thoughts of the past and starving, she had hoisted you up on her horse and rode off to Jackson, praying this mystery woman wouldn't die on the way there.

Winter 2023

You nearly fall over when his tired eyes meet yours. The loud voice of a young girl fills your ears.

"Do you two know each other?"

You push the stable door open to get a better look at the man who stands before you. For so many years you had pictured the man you dated for a few months, not trying to imagine the way the end of the world might've changed him. Your mind can't reconcile the Joel you once knew and the one before you.

For starters, he looks so tired. Graying curly hair sits atop his head, a salt and pepper beard adorns his face. Even his frame has changed, the winter coat he wears hides it but you can tell he's become riddled with muscle to take on the harsh outside world. The only thing that seems the same is his mustache, somehow untouched by time.

"Joel, wait up! There's something I gotta tell ya!"

Tommy's loud voice carries from wherever he is and you want to laugh at the younger Miller brother. Of course, he was going to try to intercept your meeting. Too bad he was too slow.

"Joel? Hello? Do you know her?" The girl asks again.

You glance at her, she can't be more than 14 or 15. Her pale skin is rosy against the cold Wyoming winter. She looks at you, probably for an answer since all Joel is doing is staring at you, most likely in shock.

Eventually, though, the man of the hour opens his mouth to speak,

"No, I don't know her."

This is my first time writing for Joel, hope you enjoyed :)

Next Part

Comment to be added to the tag list. This tag list is not chapter by chapter, I carry the tags over to each part.

Tags:

@lunaticgurly @orcasoul

[pazzispizookies]

~~~~Dangerous question~~~~

Chapter 2

Hey guys!I was truly expecting no one to read chapter one lol, so. im so greatfull for all the people that did!! I really really appreciate reblogging and tagging!! Help me get some reach y’all im very new. :) again thank you all so very much and my inbox is wide open. If you’ve ever thought of a prompt you want to read send it and I’ll write it. Truly there’s nothing I’ll say no to. (Well expect yknow insane shit)

Pairing: Paige x Azzi, friends to lovers slow burn

September 13th, 2023.

Azzi POV:

The sun is attacking my eyesight as soon as I wake up, it’s quickly accompanied by a banging and throbbing force in my head.

Forcing myself out of bed, I glance at the clock

6:23

What the fuck am I doing awake so early.

I’m startled out of my thoughts as my door swings open.

“Good afternoon sunshine!!”

I love Caroline I really do, but at this moment I want her to shut her mouth and never open it again.

“Get outtt please i’m dead, can’t you have any sympathy for the dead caro?”

“Nope, your gonna be late, we’ve gotta get going Az, -were you taking a nap?” Caroline says standing a little too confindently where her hands crossed over her chest.

“What do you mean nap? I just woke up Car?”

“Azzi it’s 6! PM! We have team dinner at 7”

Shit.

I suddenly have a burst of energy at this statement realizing fuck, I’m gonna be late and look hungover in front of my teammates, and Paige.

Paige,

Paige who showered me last night, Paige who carried me to bed and helped me get changed, Paige who stayed up with me till I feel asleep, worrying I was gonna be sick again.

Paige who I think saw blushing while I was showering?

Why is my heart racing at this, why do I care what she sees me like?

“Azzi? Azzi Fudd?” Caroline claps.

“Okay, okay yeah, just please make me a cup of coffee I’ll get ready.”

Caroline mumbles as she walks out of my dorm towards the kitchen leaving me standing in the middle of my dorm.

6:25 Pm.

Okay yeah, I’ve gotten ready in less time. I just need to leave at 6:50 to get to the restaurant, which gives me… 25 mintues to shower, change, do my hair and makeup.

Ugh.

Normally I wouldn’t even bother with makeup or hair, but for some reason I feel a pull to get ready today, wanting to look good for some reason I can’t place my finger on.

I stumble to the bathroom and turn on the shower, finding my discarded clothes from last night. I toss them to the side and hop in the shower.

The sent of Vanilla and lavender quickly fills the room while I wash my hair, giving me a slight calming feeling.

Last night suddenly hits me.

I remember leaving the party with Paige’s stupid excuse, and then falling sick shorty after, but there’s something else I remember too.

Paige being not her normal cocky self, but shy?

I could’ve sworn I saw her blush last night while I was in the shower, but it must’ve been just the lighting.

Paige is my best friend and a pretty big celebrity. She came out to me a while ago, even though it was never really a secret.

And I’ve known that girls are attracted to her, and with her aura of confidence, I don’t doubt it.

Why does that thought make my heart skip a beat?

But anyways, i’m sure Paige has had her share of incounters with girls, but all the ones I’ve seen her flirt with, even though I try not to look when it happens, are all stunning. Truly all models.

They’re normally shorter then her, and have long flowing hair and know how to do there makeup without it coming out like a 5 year old do it.

So why would she be blushing at me?

Yeah i’m not ugly, but I definitely don’t look like those girls. I’m talking 5’11 to be exact and even though my hairs gotten a lot longer it’s still curly and normally thrown in 2 braids or a bun.

I do get attention from people, but I don’t know how to flirt really, so it goes no where.

my train of thought is interrupted by knocking at the door.

“Az cmon, you got like 20 more minutes” Caroline shouts muffled behind the door.

“Okay!! Coming!!”

I stumble out of the shower quickly without rising all of my hair product out so i can style it a little bit,

I make my way to my closet and glance at the clock again

6:32. Ugh.

Looking at my closet I realize im gonna need some help.

“caro! Can you come in here!”

Caroline comes walking in with a cup of coffee in hand, thank god.

“What’s up Az? You gonna wear a towel to dinner?” Caroline teases

“No, but I need some help” I mumble out, suddenly feeling a little insecure.

with a nod from a Caroline to continue my sentence I take deep breath and gesture towards my closet

“I need help with what to wear, I wanna look hot.”

Caroline’s eye widen for a second before she leans back and crosses her arms again.

“ohhhh, you trying to impress a certain someone, maybe a certain someone on the boys basketball team who’s been in your DMs since last week?” Caroline drags out.

I totally forgot all about AJ,a guy, pretty cute,on the baksetball team who’s texted me a few times.

I just assumed he was being friendly since were both freshman but with the way shes saying it, maybe I’m wrong..

But because I don’t really know why I want to look good tonight, I decide that’s a pretty good excuse.

“Yeah sure, whatever just make me hot please.” I say flopping down on my bed.

Caroline gets to work in my closet throwing things out.

After a minute or so she holds up a dress, a black one I completely forgot I even owned,

The dress isn’t anything too crazy but definitely not something i’d normally grab, but seeing as the restaurants a little nicer maybe it’s not the worst idea.

She quickly pulls out another outfit option.

A black fitted button up, with a black mini pencil skirt, and she’s holding along with it a push-up bra that has to be from 7th grade.

“I said make me hot, not make me a hooters worker.” I say glancing up at her smirk.

“trust me Az this is the prefect mix between, ‘yeah I’m smart and sweet’ and ‘yeah I’m hot as fuck’ cmon just try it!”

Reluctantly, I get up and grab the shirt, skirt, and stupid bra. I give her a death look before moving into the closet and shutting the door.

It takes me a quick second to put on the outfit, the shirt is a little tighter than the last time I tried it on, but still fits. Just slim now.

And the skirt is a little more filled out since the last time I wore it too.

I step out and Caroline’s eyes immediately widen. Along with an ever growing smirk on her lips

“Shut up caro, seriously does this make me look like a slut?” I ask moving towards my full body mirror on my wall,

“No it doesn’t,” Caroline says moving towards my front

she takes another step foward towards me and reaches for my shirt, without giving me time to process, she’s unbuttoned 2 of the buttons on my shirt making the shirt open a little farther down, showing some cleavage, a lot more then I’m used too.

“are you kidding! I should just wave a sign saying ‘look at my boobs! There hanging out for all to see!” I shout at her,

“Shut up Azzi, it’s not that bad it’s stilll enough to make people stare, but not too much to make people judge” Caroline says taking a step back to look at me fully.

I turn back around to the mirror, and maybe she’s right,

I look diffferent, the skirt hugs my hips and brings out my curves along with the very slim fitting shirt that shows my defined body.

Maybe she knows what she’s doing.

6:37 PM

“Okay, okay now my hair, please help” I say taking my eyes off my reflection turning to look at Caroline.

“Just sit down, I know what to do, do your makeup while I do this. And none of that ‘just mascara shit’ your pretty without any makeup of course, but were going for a new Azzi tonight.” Caroline says while pulling out the chair to my vanity.

I have a lot of makeup yes, but I rarely use it, I mean, I’m an athlete, I just simply don’t have the time for it, or need.

But tonight. As I sit down and look in my vanity mirror, I wanna do something different,

While i’m applying a layer of concealer under my eyes, Caroline starts on my hair.

abut 10 mintues later, were both done. My makeup surprisingly looks petty good, it’s not anything crazy but it’s more then usual,

I have some concealer on, highlighter and some nose contour plus bronzer. Along with some winged eyeliner and mascara over my long lashes. I top it off with a darker lipgloss, and look in the mirror.

Caroline has done my hair perfectly,

Pulling it up with a claw clip, and slicking it back with two birds in the front framing my face, It looks beautiful but also effortless.

My hair being pulled up means you can see more of my chest and neck, which still are nice and tanned from the summer.

I can’t even think anything else before Caroline chimes in.

“If i was gay, i’d low key eat you out right now.”

“Caroline!!! What the hell” I say taken back by her out of pocket comment.

“No like totally Azzi, you look stunning. Your so pretty, I think your out doing me, which I hate for me but love for you.” Caroline says while placing her hands on my shoulders.

I stand from my vanity glancing at the time again, even if I didn’t like my appearance i’d have no time to change it, it’s 6:50 and we have to go now.

Me and Car both grab our wallets and phones, and put on our shoes and head out to the car.

Shortly we arrive to the restaurant, it’s pretty packed but our team has a reservation,

Me and Caroline walk in together and are taken back by the restaurant. I’m thanking the gods for putting some time into my apprernce because its a lot nicer then I expected.

The employees are all in suits and the whole building is dimly lit, only by some candles spread out and chandeliers over the bigger tables.

Outside, the sun has already set making it a little darker,

“hey Azzi, Car! Over here!!!” KK shouts

Clearly being KK she’s not phased by the looks she gets from people trying to enjoy there dinner in a peaceful manner, but that doesn’t matter.

I look over at the table, the rest of my team is already sat,

Me and Caroline share a look before beginning to walk over.

The team all look up and greet me and Caroline as we sit down.

I take a seat near the end of the table with one more open seat next to me and Caroline sits to my right.

I glance around the table and notice there’s a person missing, a certain blonde is left out of this group.

Just as I notice this ice grabs my attention.

“Damnnnnnn Azzi, didn’t know you could clean up this well, you looking like a snack!”

This statement by ice causes most of the attention from the table to fall on me, which quickly overwhelms me

The girls all say different versions of compliments, or at least I think compliments, some might be harssasing me?

Just as the harassment and fawning is in its peak a voice cuts through,

“What are we gushing over guys?” Paige says while walking toward the table.

My stomach does an unwelcomed flip.

Paige has her hair slicked back into a bun, with black and grey Jordan’s on, a simple silver chair peaking out over a gucci all black polo.

“Oh hey P, we’re just talking about how delicious Azzi looks, don’t you agree?” Ice replies,

Paige takes a seat without noticing me, sitting right next to me while I talk to Caroline, noticing her sitting next to me ,I subconsciously turn towards her.

“Hey P” I say coming out a little softer then I expected,

Paige doesn’t even reply, she just simply looks at me, her sight falling up and down taking in my whole body.

her eyesight falling right on my cleavage for a second too long, a shade a red starts to creep onto her cheeks and her neck.

“uh hi,—sorry, hey A-Azzi” Paige says reverting her eyesight to the widow quickly.

I take a mental note of this, and turn back to ice seeing that ice and KK are already staring towards me and Paige.

“Paige Bueckers, are you blushing right now!” KK shouts while laughing and pointing towards Paige,

This statment makes ice catch on too.

“She totally is! She just checked Azzi out!! Can you believe it, the rizzler Paige buckets starts stuttering over Azzi fudd.” Ice says in an exaggerated tone.

“Yo, shut up I’m not, I just, had something stuck in my throat” Paige says to them still not making complete eye contact.

“Ha sure, okay” Ice says throwing her hands up in mock surrender.

With this the table continues to have have side conversations, and start to forget about Paiges … situation.

“So, you’re not dead?” Paige says to me

“No i’m not, thanks to you.”

“No problem, I’ll always help, yknow, you were scarring me last night, you looked genuinely like a dead body.”

“Shut up P. I did not, i’m sure I looked stunning, per usual”

“Yeah, you kinda still did.” Paige says mumbling

“Aw paigeyy, did you just say that I’m the prettiest person you’ve ever seen even when I’m drunk?” I say batting my eye lashes obnoxiously,

Of course I’m teasing Paige because in reality, I have no clue why Paige said that, and I have no clue why on earth Paige was blushing while looking at me ,all I know is that I don’t want it to stop.

“Oh shut up Az, that’s not what I said at all and you know it” Paige says regaining gin her normal confident tone and smirk,

Soon after she says this, a waiter appears at our table. Right behind me.

“Hi y’all, i’ll be your sever tonight, my name is Marcos, and-

I turn around and meet his eyes when he stops his sentence.

“uh-uh yeah like I was s-saying,, um are you guys ready to order drinks?”

I hear ice snort and KK elbows her while looking down biting back her own laugh.

clearly the table is waiting for someone to speak up as the “designated speaker for the night” and reluctantly I start speaking.

I lock my eyes onto his and notice, he’s kinda cute, he’s pretty tall from what I can gauge in my seat, and he has wavy dark hair loose, but cut nicely, he so looks pretty in shape and his button up fits pretty snuggly around his arms.

ignoring this I start talking,

“Hi Marcos nice to meet you, excuse my friends, they don’t know how to behave, but I think we’ll all just have waters, maybe with some lemon in them, please.”

“Y-yeah, i’ll go grab those” Marcos says still making direct eye contact with me,

He lingers for a beat too long before disappearing into the restaurant.

I hear laughter being let out as soon as he’s out of ear shot.

“PSHHH Azzi, keep it in your pants” KK says raising her eyebrows up.

“yeah Az, that guy was eye fucking you,” Ice says before bracing her hands on the table,

“All right y’all, I got 20 saying Marcos asks Azzi out before the end of the night, whos in” Ice says to the table

“Ice!” I yell at her as a warning,

But I look around and see the majority of the table with the same expression all fumbling in their wallets and letting out quips about how he will or won’t.

I turn to complain to Caroline but am met by a horrid sight,

“Caro! Are you seriously betting on me right now.”

“Sorry Az, but it felt like I was interrupting something” She says shrugging.

My head falls into my hands but suddenly I feel tension to my left.

Paige is sitting there looking down at the table with an expression I’ve never seen on her face before.

“P, you good? You look like you wanna punch something.” I say putting my hand on her shoulder

“I’m good, Azzi.” Paige says coldly while pushing my hand off her,

A wave of hurt courses through me at this action, before I can say anything Marcos returns.

“Here you go,” He says while placing waters in front of each person, making his way down the table

“and here you go, gorgeous.” He says while putting the water directly infront of me before disappearing back into the restaurant.

Before I can react, Paige jolts up and starts walking fast towards where I can asssume the bathroom is.

“What’s her deal?” Ice says to Nika.

“I don’t know, but I have an idea.” Nika says while leaning back in her chair watching Paige go.

After a few mintues Paige returns and slips back into her seat.

“Hey”

“Hi.” Paige coldly returns

“You okay there?” I ask leaning into her space a little.

“Yeah Azzi, you don’t have to keep asking me.” Paige replies while reaches for her phone and looking down at it.

Feeling slightly rejected I turn to Caroline, tapping her on the shoulder.

I make a face at Caroline, gesturing towards Paige slyly.

Caroline answers by slugging her shoulders up, telling me she doesn’t know why she’s acting this way either.

I decide not to let it way on me too much, I know that something’s wrong with Paige, but I also know Paige won’t talk about it, especially in public.

Minutes pass that are filled with laughter and conversation as the group warms up more.

Another sever comes around to take or orders and Ice makes a quick comment asking where the “cute server” went.

The other waitress saying he went on break, but she’ll send him back if we want.

before anyone can say anything ice starts nodding her head and then places her order.

Conversation continues after our food order was placed, and it seems to be a good night, expect for Paige being uncharacteristically quiet, giving short answers or simply ignoring everyone whilst being on her phone tuned into a live NBA game.

After a while Marcos returns with the other waiter both holding food in their hands.

The waitress starts on the other end of the table while Marcos starts by putting food down to Caroline, skipping me and putting Paiges food down next, after this he returns back to me and sets my food down with a comment, “Best for last” he says with a wink.

I bush a little, caught off guard by the comment, so I send him a smile while turning around to my food.

“OOOOOhhhh” KK says while looking at me

“KK shut up” I say through my smile,

“Both of you shut up.” Paige cuts in

The table falls silent but it doesn’t seem to bother her, her eyes remaining on her NBA game,

The girls including me all look around at each other before quietly making conversation again,

Nika pulls out her phone and starts typing on it.

Shorty after I hear a notification chime on Paige’s phone which is met with her standing up, and Nika at the same time,both of them disappearing back towards the bathroom.

Once they are far enough I turn to KK,

“What is happening, it’s like Paige got a stick shoved up her ass.”

“I don’t know, ask Nika later, she seems to know more than us.” KK replies with picking up her food and taking a big bite.

Marcos come back, check in hand.

“Hey guys sorry to interrupt, but here’s the check for whenever you need,”

He places the check down in the middle of the table and ice nods at him, signaling she heard him,

With that I see him turn towards me.

I suddenly get a sinking feeling in my chest,

“Um, this is strange but you’re stunning, and I was wondering if I could get your number?”

My breath gets caught, I was not expecting that.

“Umm yea, Yeah sure.” I say fumbling for my phone.

I don’t know why i’m saying yes, but it’s like my brains on autopilot.

Give him my phone, open on contacts and look over at ice whos collecting 20 dollar bills.

I can’t do anything but roll my eyes before Macos gives me my phone back.

“Thank you, hope to see you soon, “ He say with a wink, while walking backwards and turning towards the back of the restaurant.

“I TOLD YALLL!” Ice shouts while waving her new 20 dollars bills at her self.

“Shush ice just eat your food.” I say rolling my eyes.

Caroline nudges me and nods her head up, making me tun around,

Paige and Nika are walking back towards the table.

Paige is walking, lacking her normal confidence, her mind seems somehwere else, and Nika looks, well, pissed to say the least.

They both sit down without saying anything and the table shares looks between each other.

With this new enegery the team eats quietly,

Before anyone can do anything. Paige throws 4- hundred dollar bills down on the table and gets up. Walking towards the door.

Nika huffs and gets up, following Paige.

The team watches them leave and get into their car, Nika starts driving off almost immediately.

Ice turns back from the window and claps her hands with an exhale.

“Well y’all, I guess dinners paid for, and I guess we’re done!” She says while nudging KK

No ones really wanting to stay after the disaster of a dinner we had, everyone starts making there way towards to exit while speaking low, presumably about Paiges dramatic exit.

It’s just me and Caroline remaining, and we start heading towards our car.

In the middle of our quiet drive back I get a text,

Marcos(server): Hey, would you be interested in dinner next weekend? :)

[chriss-slut]

Pls pls write a one shot abt this. https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGeVwJ6f4/

Begging

Significant Other

~ Chris Sturniolo x fem!reader ~

Synopsis: basically, inspired on this tiktok.

Warnings: none, just fluff and making out <3

A/N: It's a little short and i don't think it ended well but i tried :) and thank u for the requestt!!

Me and Chris date for about 6/7 months now. We're really affectionate with each other, and when i say really, i mean really. PDA is literally our thing, always holding hands, always glued to each other or even kissing while we're inside or outside. We really don't care about what other people think and if we could, we probably would even hook up in public, yeah...

Anyways... I'm now at the triplets house, I've been here for a week now, and we're kinda having a party. Almost all of the triplets' friends are here. Some of them in the livingroom part chatting and others in the kitchen, eating and chatting as well.

I'm with Chris sitting on the couch, well, I'm sitting on his lap to be more specific.

Everyone is chatting among them while me and Chris are just listening to them. Chris speaks too but not as much as the others. i keep silent cuz i don't know about what they're talking. I've been looking at Chris this whole time. Even though I'm on his lap, we didn't cuddle much today and yesterday so I'm needy for love.

"What's up, babe?" Chris whispers at me as he catches me staring at him, while his friends are talking in the background.

I shake my head quickly, getting out of transe "Uh.. nothing! Sorry!" I say, trying to brush it off, and i look at the group of people talking.

Chris frowns at me, not buying it. "No. You've been staring at me for too long. What's happening?"

I sigh, Chris knows me too well. "Alriight... i miss you, that's just it!"

"Miss me? I'm literally under you!" Chris speaks softly, chuckling softly.

"Not like thaat! I miss being with you, cuddling with you, kissing you... those kind of stuff!" i whisper at him.

Chris smirks at me and leans in to kiss my neck softly "Why didn't you tell me earlier? I could've gave you what you wanted!" he speaks softly against my neck.

I shiver softly "I dunno... I didn't want to bother you, I guess." I whisper softly, my hand massaging his scalp.

"You'll never bother me if you want love..." He mumbles softly against my neck. Chris starts nibbling and sucking on my sweet spot in my neck, making me moan lowly and shift my position in his lap, so I'm hugging him completely.

Chris smirks again and run his kisses up to my face, kissing my cheeks, nose and lips. When he gets to my mouth, i can't help but deepen the kiss.

Chris returns the deep kiss and we start making out in the middle of a huge group of people, his hands now cupping my ass and my arms around his neck.

All of the voices in the background fade and the only thing we can hear is our muffled soft moans and the sloppy noises of our tongues and lips against each other.

After a while, our session is cut off by a voice.

"Chris!!! Stop almost eating Y/N and get your ass here!" Nick yells for the - god knows how many - time from the kitchen.

Chris pulls away from me and growls annoyed. "What?!?" He yells at Nick.

"Chris, I've been calling for you for 10 minutes! Are you deaf??" Nick yells back.

Chris rolls his eyes "And are you blind? Can't you see I'm busy??"

Nick rolls his eyes as well "You're busy making out? Did you know you can do it at any time of the day without being in the middle of a party??"

Chris sighs "Jesus Christ..." He taps my ass, indicating for me to get off him.

I stand up and sit on the spot we were as Chris stands up as well and goes over the kitchen.

I take a deep breath and wipe my mouth, cleaning the saliva that was around my lips. I stay zoned out, thinking about our make out.

"Hey, baby, I'm back!" I get cut off my transe hearing Chris speaking to me while standing right in front of me. i look up at him and smile. I move to the side, giving him space for him to sit down next to me.

"What did Nick want?" I speak softly, leaning against Chris.

Chris wraps an arm around my waist, pulling me to his chest. "Just a random annoying shit... Don't worry about it, I'm here now" he says sweetly at me, smiling.

i smile back at him "okay, then..." i lean to peck his lips "i love you, you know that?"

"i love you too, baby" i speaks softly, leaning to kiss me again, this time, more intensively.

I hope you liked it!! Pls tell me what you think in the comments, i'd appreciate it :) xoxo <3

[catch1ngmoths]

Hi my pookie 😏 Can I request a Joost Klein x fem!reader where it's unrequited love, reader likes Joost, and she's about to give up because he doesn't feel the same but something happens to the reader which causes Joost to panic and confess he's always loved her?

�� ONCE MORE TO SEE YOU ⛆

𝄞⨾𓍢ִ໋ “So come inside and be with me, alone with me, alone with me, alone. If you would let me give you pinky promise kisses, then I wouldn't have to scream your name atop of every roof in the city of my heart.” -Mitski𝄞⨾𓍢ִ໋

Summary: your in love with Joost and do everything to try and show your love for him but he doesn’t seem to reciprocate your feelings and even gets involved with another girl. Talking about her 24/7 but suddenly you finally boil over and snap at him. Not knowing your standing in the middle of the street….

Note: THIS ONE IS DRAMATIC AS HELL LOL, anyways finally have the energy to finish a fic! I might post another one soon also, hope yall didn’t miss me too much ;)

Warnings: just straight up y/n and Joost hurting and y/n kinda sorta gets hit by a car (ಡ᎔ಡ)

*ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚

Pain. That’s all this brought you was pain. Being joost’s best friend and loyal companion was the best and worst thing you’ve experienced. Joost was your favorite person, and you were his. But what he didn’t know was how you felt, how you stared at him longingly every chance you could.

How desperately you wanted to snuggle close to him and explain all your feelings to him. But you couldn’t, not when all he talked about was her. Louise. A girl he met and was how infatuated with, or that’s how it seemed in your eyes. He talked about their relationship and how it kept building day by day.

Today was just another day you felt the familiar tug at your heart, “-and then she said she loved my glasses, it was so kind!” Joost says, laying back as his head rests in your lap, eyes looking straight up at the starry sky you both sat under. Your body tenses and you let out a soft sigh but you quickly recover and look down at him with a smile.

“I’m glad she likes your dorky glasses, might be the only one” you say with a teasing snicker, making Joost look up at you with a faux offended stare and a pout. It wasn’t true, you loved his glasses, you always have. But I guess he never payed any mind to your compliments towards the thick black glasses that sat on his face, but he did for her. Funny isn’t it? Your snapped out of your thoughts as Joost speaks, “ha ha, very funny.” He says as he reaches up to pinch your cheek with a small chuckle.

You smile apawn the contact and lean into his touch that’s quickly stolen away as he lowers his hand back down. The warmth leaving your cheek and making your heart clinch and you look up at the stars as well. You could never tell him, you couldn’t ruin this for him.

Little did you know joost wanted nothing more then to sit up and kiss you in that moment, your teasing words and soft smile made his head spin. He was so in love with you but he couldn’t tell you. Not when you were so out of his league, I mean you’re you and he’s…well he’s him. You were way too good for him. He could never tell you, he couldn’t take you when there’s someone out there that was way better looking than him.

So Joost was willing to try and move on, when he saw Louise and noticed how into him she was he took his chance. He wanted you to do the same- well not wanted. He needed you to find someone like he was, someone that was better than him so he could at least try and get over you. He hoped him always bringing Louise up would push you in that direction, he didn’t know it would hurt you the worst you’ve been hurt in your life.

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

During present time, were at your breaking point, you couldn’t listen to it anymore. So you snapped, you snapped at Joost when he brought up Louise once more. “We held hands today, she said my hands were very soft and warm?! Can you believe that- my hands are neither sof-“ he’s cut off by an aggravated sigh and he looks up at you immediately.

“What’s wrong?” He asks as he tries to scan your face to get information on what exactly you’re feeling. “Are you done?” You spat aggressively, you didn’t mean to be rude. Truly you didn’t! But you were just so filled with jealousy and envy that you snapped. Joost looks taken aback and stayed silent for a bit before speaking again, “am I done…?” He says in a tone that very stern.

“Yeah, are you done talking about her all the time?!” You replied as you rubbed your temples and stood up from where you were sitting right next to him on his couch. “Uhh…what the hell is your deal?” He says with furrowed eyebrows, starting to become frustrated at your sudden hostility.

“My deal is that you’re always talking about her! I get it, you’re in love with her but I don’t wanna hear it anymore! Okay??” You say as Joost also stands from his spot on the couch, “in love-?! Wha-“ he’s cut off by you again, “always talking about how great she is while I just sit here feeling like a third wheel!” You continue as he scoffs, “okay well I thought you were happy for me!?” He says, both of your voices raising.

“I am!! I’m just tried of hearing about how awesome and smart and beautiful she is!” You reply as you roll your eyes. “Jesus why are you acting like this?!” He says, making you scoff and cross your arms. “Uh what the fuck is that supposed to mean!!? I’m just sick of hearing about it!” You narrow your eyes at him.

You rub them bridge of your nose before you start walking towards his front door, leaving. “I’m just gonna go.” You say coldly making Joost shake his head. “What?! You can’t just leave like this?!” He says as he follows after you hastily. You don’t turn and continue walking, were you being a little dramatic? Sure. But the feelings you’ve bottled up for so long were finally erupting and you weren’t thinking about that.

“Watch me.” You snarl as you walk down the street, you didn’t know where you were going…hell you were staying with Joost for the time being, you just needed space. Joost didn’t understand that, knowing you had nowhere else to go. He didn’t want anything to happen to you so he follow behind you but you picked up the pace.

“Why the hell are you so adamant about this?! What the fuck is your problem” he says as you groan in annoyance and swiftly turn to him, standing in the middle of the empty road. He finally sees your eyes that were filled with tears, some rolling down your cheeks. It broke his heart as his eyes widen.

You laugh bitterly and sarcastically, “what is my problem?!” You raise your voice, “my problem is that you love this girl and you don’t even realize how I feel about you!! How much I love you, but you’re too busy with her to even realize! I’ve tried everything, everything joost! But your too busy with her to ever notice me so I’m don’t trying to get you to notice me!! ”

You weren’t thinking, you were just rambling as you spoke, Joost froze, not that you realized. Your vision was blurry from the tears in your eyes. Something else you failed to realize was the car coming right in your direction. (I know this is so dramatic (ᵕ—ᴗ—) I couldn’t think of anything else to happen to reader! Plus who doesn’t like a little dramatics!)

You both noticed too late, once you noticed the approaching lights you swiftly turned and saw the car speeding towards you. You have no time to react before your eyes widen, you hear your name being screamed and then everything goes black.

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

Your eyes crack open as you feel blinded by a bright light, you groan and try to sit up but you feel a pair of soft hands wrapping around you. Your breath hitches and eyes widen as you hear soft sobs coming from the person holding you.

Your senses finally come back to you as you see the bright blonde hair that you could recognize anywhere. Your wrap your arms around him as well, “j-Joost..? What happened?” You say weakly, your whole body hurt. But Joost finally stops hugging you, holding your cheeks in his hands as tears roll down his face.

“Your dumbass got hit by a car” he says with a shakey laugh, “god I’m so glad your okay” he finishes as he presses soft kisses to your head, your memory coming back as you groan and burry your face in his chest. A soft chuckle coming from the man in response. He sighs and lifts your chin up, looking deep in your eyes

“I’m not…I’m not talking to Louise anymore.” He says and your heart drops, you did this, you made him stop seeing the “love of his life” Joost immediately notices your widened eyes and shakes his head, “because…I figured out who I’m truly meant to be with.” He says with a soft smile as he presses his forehead to yours

“W-who..?” You say as your heart feels like it’s beating out of your chest. “How about I show you huh?” He says with a smirk before lowering his head and connecting his lips to yours, you both part with shallow breaths, ““I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. I didn’t know you thought of me like that, Louise was just a distraction because-“ he pauses and looks away

“Because I was trying to distract myself from how much I love you. God I’m so sorry this is all my fa-“ he’s cut off by your soft voice, “shut up and kiss me again” he smiles before pressing his lips gently back to yours and suddenly, even being in the hospital, everything doesn’t seem so bad..

*ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚༺☆༻*ੈ✩‧₊˚ *ੈ✩‧₊˚

This fic actually sucks ass, I’m sorry for the bad fic lol I promise I’ll try to lock in 🙏🏻🥲

[theemporium]

Ahhh can I order a violet fluff with jack and #7?? 💜

thank you for requesting!🫶🏽

7. “I can hardly wait to put a ring on that finger.”

.

“I’m in love with you.”

You snorted, but smiled anyway. “I’m in love with you, too.”

“No, like, I’m in love with you.”

You blinked, pausing your movements as you turned to look at your boyfriend. Neither of you had said anything in the last thirty or so minutes, both lost in your own tasks. Music had been playing from the speaker Jack set up in the middle of the room, accompanying you two in the semi-empty apartment. 

It wasn’t the first apartment you two shared together. Your lease had ended and the decision to move in together had always been there, but neither of your apartments felt right. But with Jack’s place locked in for a few more months, it had been an easy decision for you to move in with him until you found a place together. 

But life got in the way, as it did. The move happened at the end of the summer and then the season started, and you got a promotion, and none of the places you viewed felt right. It felt like the universe was working against you two until you found this apartment in downtown Jersey City. 

It was cute and perfect, and needed a little work done before it was fully yours to enjoy together. So, when the boys finished up for the season and the two of you had more free time on your hands, you thought working on the apartment yourselves as much as you could would help make your first apartment a little more special. 

“Jack, babe,” your voice was a little softer than usual as you slowly placed the paint roller down on the tray. “You feeling good?” 

He frowned, like you were the one acting odd here. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” 

“Because we’ve been dating for almost four years and I’m pretty sure we did the ‘I love you’s ages ago,” you said to him as you stepped over the stray tools scattered across the floor until you reached him. You raised your hand, pressing the back of your palm against his forehead. “Did you hit your head? Is this a memory loss thing?” 

“I’m fine,” Jack huffed, but leaned into your touch nonetheless. His hands dropped to your waist, pulling you that bit closer before you could try to step away. “I’m just saying, it’s kinda hit me.”

“Four years to realise you’re in love with me?” You asked, your eyes narrowing slightly.

“Yes,” he answered instantly before frowning. “No, like…I know I love you. I know I’m in love with you. But it's just hit me that I am in love with you.”

You blinked. “You lost me, babe.”

“Like, look at us. Look at this,” he emphasised as he waved at the room around you both. “This is our real lives. I get to live with you. I get to kiss you. This is all real life. This is our reality! Isn’t that just crazy?” 

Your face softened a little. “We’re lucky.” 

“I’m lucky,” he corrected as he wound his arms around your waist to close the little remaining distance between you. “Most guys don’t even know what love is and I get you. I get us. I get Saturdays spent painting our apartment that we bought together. That’s fucking insane.”

“You’re feeling awfully sappy today,” you noted, though your chest tightened at his words as you placed your hands on either side of his face. “I’m glad it’s all with you.”

“I don’t want it with anyone else but you,” Jack confessed, his voice dropping to a quiet whisper even if it was only the two of you in the apartment. “All of it. Like, even the future stuff.” 

You bit back your smile. “The future stuff?” 

“Yeah, the proper serious adult shit,” Jack nodded with a completely straight face. “Like marriage and kids. And adopting a dog.” 

“Adopting a dog is more serious than marriage?” You laughed, trying to pretend like your whole face wasn’t heating up at the idea that he wanted to marry you, that Jack imagined that future with you too. 

“I mean, we can change the rules. I’m down for a dog after we get engaged,” he bargained, a boyish grin taking over his face as the two of you softly swayed on the spot.

“Depends on the proposal,” you joked.

“Hm,” Jack hummed before he turned his face to press a kiss to your left hand. “I can hardly wait to put a ring on that finger.”

Your heart skipped a beat. “For the dog?”

“For you,” Jack corrected. “For us to be forever, baby.” 

“I like the sound of that.” 

“Good,” Jack grinned. “Cause it’s gonna happen and it’s gonna be the best goddamn proposal you have ever seen. And then we are gonna get our dog to make the day perfect.”

You snorted. “Deal.”

.

[emma-o-yt]

Rick Riordan's problematic age gaps

Apparently reddit hates criticism because this got removed from there after a few minutes, maybe I can get it back up...anyways.

The age of consent in Texas is 17, Texas is where Rick lived (according to wikipedia) up until 2013. And yet...here we are.

Where do I even begin with this bullf*ckery? How about the most egregious of all?

Luke and Annabeth

We have two lines confirming their mutual feelings, one from The Demigod Diaries:

"Overtime, Annabeth developed a crush on Luke. As Annabeth got older, Luke developed feelings for her, too."

Mark of Athena (from her conversation with Venus):

"First there was Luke Castellan, her first crush, who had seen her only as a little sister; then he’d turned evil and decided he liked her—right before he died."

Now let me remind you, Annabeth and Luke have a seven year age difference, they knew each other at 7 and 14. By the time he died, Annabeth was just 16, while he was 23. And it's implied he begun returning her feelings a little before he asked her to run away, perhaps when she was 14. He's paralleled with Percy as Annabeth is his string in the river styx. He asks Annabeth explicitly if she loved him romantically (and she denies because Percy is there).

It's disgustingly inappropriate but at the very least they don't end up together...as for when they do...

Sadie Kane and Anubis

When it comes to immortal romance, I usually go for coded age. Anubis is thousands of years old but is mentally and physically 16, which is fine and dandy except for the fact that Sadie is 12. What do you want me to say except Rick is disgusting for promoting this.

Speaking of extreme age gaps:

Calypso and Leo

When you have a philosophy that every character must end up in a relationship, you run out of sensical options to pair up. Now, I'm a Caleo hater mainly because of how it retconned PJO and also because they are very toxic.

Now hold on, doesn't Caleo fall into coded age? Calypso is 15/16 and Leo is 15, so it's A okay! I suppose, if it wasn't for Calypso's past loves.

Odysseus, he had a wife and a son who was 20 years old in his final year on Ogygia, he is well into adult age. She also mentions the privateer Francis Drake and his wife Elizabeth, he was 45 when he married her.

If your defence is that she's actually thousands of years old, then that must also apply to Caleo. You cannot have it both ways.

Hazel and Frank

It's not that bad but it's necessary to mention for the point I will be making.

The timeline is messed up but I think they're 13 and 16 and meet at 12-15. I mean, come on.

Misogyny and Racism

What do these have in common? Well in 3/4 or 4/4, the younger one is female. In 2/4 or 3/4, the younger one is a person of colour.

Remember Nico? His crush on Percy as revealed in HoH? Well in MoA, there's a cheeky little red herring that happens a bit before Annabeth's talk with Venus (where it is revealed that Luke liked Annnabeth back). She wonders if Nico had a crush on her, but denounces him as too young. Now, Nico's age is inconsistent, I am unsure of his gap with Annabeth but I do know his gap with Percy. It's 3 years 5 months in PJO and 2 years 5 months in HoO (the series we are currently in).

So in RR's messed up mind, a white boy having a relationship with someone 2 to less than 4 years his senior is inappropriate. But a black tween girl dating someone 3 years her senior is just fine, a 12 year old biracial black girl dating a 16 year old is daijoubu, a 15 year old mestizo Latino boy dating an elderly woman is relationship goals, or the reverse a 15 year old girl dating middle aged men is a tragic romance and a 12 year old girl having mutual feelings with a 19 year old man is a "love story for the ages"!

The tv adaptation is so infuriating for this, they made Annabeth black, a lot of the changes they made came off as micro aggressions but especially her relationship with Luke. It's reduced to Luke simping for Annabeth behind her back and it's even worse because you can visibly see how large their age gap is. Heck, Charlie Bushnell and Leah Jeffries have a smaller age gap than book Luke and Annabeth.

Adultification is a huge real life issue. Children of colour and especially female children of colour are seen as less innocent than their white counterparts. Rick, who is dedicated to inclusivity should've known better than to include these illegal relationships. Stans will try and make excuses but it's there, deal with it.

As a black teenage girl who has been a fan of Rick's work for 12 years, I am disappointed.

[karmacharmeleon18]

So, realistically... what is Jean's level of French???

Please stay with me lol

Jean was homeschoold his whole childhood so he pretty much only spoke the language with his parents (and they barely had positive interactions, let alone conversations 🙄😡), his little sister Elodie and the occasional tutor/s.

He left France at 14 and was forbidden to ever speak French again

He taught Kevin French but they were in the Nest iirc? Which means that he was 16 and 2 years had passed already in which he spoke 0 French

But even if he'd started teaching him as soon as he arrived, it would've been the French of a 14 year old (who didn't even speak French with the standard, Parisian accent)

Can you imagine learning a language from a 14yo?

Nora has always been very unrealistic when it comes to languages

Nicky speaking perfect German after a year in Berlin, so good that he could teach two other people (speaking and teaching a language are two completely different beasts, and even just speaking German isn't easy, there's a funny Vietnamese youtuber who has lived in Germany with her German partner and going to university there for over 5 years and still struggles)

Neil speaking French and German because he lived in specific places for a couple of years or even just months... despite living the life of a recluse, barely going to school and having almost 0 human interactions outside of his mother

(from the extra content, Andreil learning Russian in months just like that, so they can have a private language to speak in that no one else in the Foxes understands)

Kevin being fluent in French despite having only a 14/16yo as a teacher, speaking it for a couple of years in secret, and with no access to other speakers is laughable to me lol his French should be full of slang words and improper use of tenses

I think Nora realized this because she's providing Jeremy with more resources now

She was like, oh shit, maybe a person cannot pick up a language just by speaking it for a few months with one other person who hasn't spoken the language in years and stopped learning it at 14

But anyway back to the point: what even is Jean's level of French?

Can you imagine yourself leaving your country at 14, not being allowed to speak your mother tongue again, and then having to teach someone else?

Can you imagine someone in middle school/first year of high school teaching you their language?

And you learning enough to become fluent?

... Not even Jean should be fluent in French.

There, I said it.

He stopped learning/reading/speaking it at 14

And on top of it, he had to learn 2 completely different languages, English and Japanese

In general there's a huge difference between the language level of a 14 year old middle schooler (French system) and homeschooled at that, and say, the level of a 21 year old who's gone through regular schooling and university

Not only in France, but everywhere. You are not the same speaker/writer/reader you were at 14

Even now, can you imagine yourself teaching, properly teaching your language to someone that has never spoken it before? Be honest

Teaching is hard.

And imagine doing that after you stopped learning as a kid? And had to learn 2 different languages instead?

Now for some personal anecdotes: my mother tongue is Italian, I was born and raised in Italy with my Italian-speaking family and I still live here. But I also speak English all day long with my friends, online and at uni, I almost exclusively read in English. And guess what happens because of this? I mess up my Italian. I can't remember words. I use English words instead of Italian ones etc. Despite being surrounded by the Italian language 24/7. My brother lived in London for years, and now lives in Zurich, when he visits us, he slips English or German words into his Italian without even realizing

And sooo many immigrant kids can tell you how hard it is to not forget your mother tongue, even if you speak it at home, because you're just bombarded with a different language all day long, at school, at work, in the streets, with friends, etc.

The bilingual struggle is real lol

But not for Neil, Andrew, Aaron, Nicky, Kevin. Even Jean

He stopped learning and speaking French when he was a boy, yet is somehow fluent enough to teach people

To me it sounds like Nora uses languages as character traits, without realizing what learning a language actual entails

It has gotten marginally better in this new trilogy. Jean sometimes needs help with some English words. Jeremy is actually studying French

But as my French professor told our class one day, "I studied French, I got my Bachelor's and Master's in French with top grades, I moved to France... and realized I cannot speak French with actual French people."

So I really hope we're not getting fluent-in-French-Jeremy by the end of the year. It takes years and years of studying and speaking a language with native speakers to become fluent. Not a few months

Now, Jeremy might have all the incentive in the world to learn French (*wink wink*), he might even be a prodigy, who knows. But I'd love to see a more realistic approach

And above all I'd love to see Jean picking up Jeremy's books, or any French books, and learning more about his language

(or even better, books in his actual native language, which is Occitan)

He's been deprived of it for so long, and he should absolutely not be proficient in it enough to teach someone else. He deserves the chance to teach himself first. And access to the French tutors and students on campus to have proper conversations. Let him listen to French audiobooks, to French music. Let him watch French movies.

A language is not an object, something you get once and can own forever. A language is a skill, if you don't practice it, you lose it.

Idk if maybe Nora is a language prodigy and doesn't get this???

Edit: an important addition by @rhyslahey

.

I can't help but compare this to Spanish. Most of Spain speaks Castilian Spanish, that's the standard Spanish that gets taught in schools in the rest of Europe, but cities like Barcelona or Valencia speak their own languages

In Barcelona you'll hear Catalan

And in Valencia you'll hear Valencian, which is a specific dialect of Catalan

Both cities belong to autonomous regions of Spain, respectively Catalunya and the Valencian Community

My mom is fluent in Spanish but she had issues reading signs in Barcelona and Valencia because they were in languages that aren't Spanish, despite being in Spain

I feel like Jean's French is like that?

Marseille is not part of an autonomous territory, but it is in a region of France that is far away from Paris, and historically has had periods of rebellion against and even independence from the central power/French government

I can't remember much from my French classes, but I recall that

Northern French (Paris) is based on the dialect group called "langue d'oïl"

Southern French (Marseille) is based on the dialect group called "langue d'oc"

langue d'oïl developed into standard/Parisian French (what Jeremy is studying)

langue d'oc developed into Occitan (what Jean speaks), and modern Occitan is even called "lenga d'oc" by native speakers

(also, Occitan itself has many variants, some even spoken in Northern Italy)

So technically Jeremy and Jean... still speak two different languages

Because Jeremy is learning standard French, while Jean only knows Occitan

This goes beyond accents

Jeremy doesn't need a tutor from Marseille to fix his accent

If he wants to speak Jean's language, he needs Occitan language books specific to Marseille

Nora could have avoided all this by making Jean come from Northern France instead

(there are still local variants, but it's not as dramatic as two different languages)

🙈🙈🙈

[imnothanah]

Best friend's best friend

No warnings needed! 

 Synopsis: What would happen if Geto had a middle school best friend who just recently moved to Tokyo? And that person is YOU. _

Part 1.

Gojo Satoru whose eyes widened immediately upon seeing you for the first time.

It was, as Gojo exasperatedly put it, a hot scorching day on a normal afternoon. It was during their day off that the trio Suguru, Satoru, and Shoko were waiting for someone, though Gojo couldn’t seem to keep his complaints in check.

"This is ridiculous!" Gojo groaned, arms flailing dramatically. "I mean, seriously, why do I have to be here waiting for someone I have never met!." The way Gojo has been complaining as though they have been out for half a day, even though it has only been exactly 7 minutes, was starting to get on Geto’s back.

Shoko, ever the calm one, adjusted her sunglasses and glanced up at the sun. “If you’re so uncomfortable, maybe you should stop talking. It’s just making it worse.”

Gojo huffed but didn't seem to hear her. He was too busy muttering under his breath about the unfairness of it all, how utterly ridiculous this situation was, and seeing that Shoko didn’t seem to gaf, he turned his attention to Suguru.

 “Hey you’re the one who told us to wait! Where is this person anyways.” Gojo continued to poke Geto’s side, clearly trying to get a reaction from the latter.

Suguru leaned against the nearby wall, barely reacting to Gojo’s whining, sighed deeply. He didn’t flinch, knowing Gojo’s antics were just part of the routine at this point. "Patience, Satoru," Geto said dryly. "They’ll be here alright, complaining about it won’t speed things up."

 Gojo pouted, narrowing his eyes. “Patience? With this heat? You’ve gotta be kidding me." He flung his arms out dramatically, catching Shoko’s eye, who was also unfazed by the entire scene.

"You should’ve brought a fan or something," she said casually, not even looking up from her phone.

Gojo looked at her in disbelief. "A fan? What’s that gonna do when it’s like this?" He gestured at the shimmering heat around them. "You think waving a fan is gonna cool me down?"

Suguru didn’t seem particularly bothered either, his usual calm demeanor unshaken by Gojo’s theatrics. "Cool your body temperature or your head?"

Gojo’s eyes widened, turning on Suguru. “You’ve got to be kidding me! That's not the point anyways! I'm sweating enough water for all of Africa! How am I supposed to look swag in this condition?!”

Shoko glanced over at Suguru, raising an eyebrow. “Did he just say he cares about looking cool in this heat?” earning a laugh from Suguru.

Gojo was quick to defend himself “So what!?”, but the other two only laughed harder! 

 The trio stood there, the air thick with Gojo’s grumbling and luckily when Gojo was about to blow up, the mysterious person finally appeared.

“Geto!” You waved. And that was enough to get everybody’s attention, not excluding the Six eyes user, his eyes narrowing as he turned towards you. He opened his mouth to question what took you so long, but when his eyes landed on you, his mind went blank for a moment. 

He swore to God he had never seen anybody like that before!! He had already imagined you with him and him, 3 dogs, 2 children and a penthouse near the coastline growing old together. He could almost hear the sound of laughter echoing off the walls, feeling the warmth of family around him. It all seemed so vivid, so real, like it was meant to happen.

 All of that time waiting for you was definitely worth it! He had never believed in love at first sight before, but today says otherwise. But before he could fully process the whirlwind going on in his chest, you were already almost within reach, running towards them fast.

 Gojo had never bat an eye on a non sorcerer before, he had always considered them weaklings that could never be on the same par as him, but this time it was different! He tried to stay calm, but he could feel his heart racing, the desire to step in and speak bubbling up, but he held back, opting to act cool first, think later. He swore every step you take, its like you’re leaving flower trails behind, being all happy happy.

then suddenly a loud BAM could be heard!

Someone crashed into you and you fell.

 Gojo, still recovering from the wave of emotions that had hit him the second he laid eyes on you, tried to compose himself by snapping his attention to somewhere else while Geto hurriedly ran to your side.

  “Hey! Are you ok?!?” Suguru made quick work of pulling you up, as he tried to hold back his laughter. 

 THAT WAS EMBARRASSING. But you still smiled at Suguru’s question, shrugging him off after confirming you were fine. “Tokyo’s as chaotic as ever. You know, nothing’s really changed”.

 Suguru chuckled, brushing off the dust from his clothes. “I can imagine. Oh by the way these are my friends, I-”

 Before he could finish his scentence, you pushed him out of the way, making him fall back and quickly made a Beeline for his friends. “You must be Shoko! I’ve heard so much about you it’s an honor!” You said as you shook Shoko’s hands like there was no tomorrow (No chance of shaking the goddess hands anymore). 

 “Oh and white lavender hair with sunglasses! You must be Gojo!” You said as you held out your hand for him to shake.

At that, Gojo cleared his throat, his voice almost coming out sharper than he intended. “Y-Yeah, that’s me,” he stammered, trying to regain his usual confidence but failing miserably. He quickly reached out, his hand meeting yours in a firm handshake.

 The moment your fingers brushed against his, it felt like a jolt of electricity ran through him.  “Woah did you just wash your hands? I hope it's not what i'm thinking it is!” You blurted while looking at him straight in the eyes. He blinked, his heart hammering in his chest, “Excuse me?”.

“Right! I forgot to introduce myself!” You said as you brushed your hand together, flicking off “I used to go to middle school with Geto, that's how we met!” You chirped, not noticing how the white haired sorcerer is baffled.

“Wow, Geto went to a normal middle school? That's new” Shoko casually said as she leaned back, still the nonchalant queen she is.

Geto’s brow furrowed as he let out a small, almost exasperated sigh as he stood up from where he was pushed. "Yes, surprise! I wasn’t homeschooled like you guys," he shot back, his tone dry but not without a hint of amusement. "And what do you mean 'normal'?"

 You burst into laughter. “Yeah, I understand where this is coming from, you probably can’t picture him blending in with the regular crowd.” 

Your eyes flickering to Geto, who was clearly trying to keep his cool despite the playful jabs. He looked like he was going to defend himself but instead just crossed his arms. “I did survive, thank you very much,” Geto replied . “And I did make a few friends along the way, despite what you two might think.”  Gojo, who had been momentarily distracted by his thoughts of you, snapped out of it and burst into a laugh. This afternoon was going to be well spent after all.

[sehnsuchts-trunken]

Red or Blue

Tangerine x reader <3 based on this lovely prompt

it's kind of a slow burn, which is so unlike me, but- welp. whatever? ig? no triggerwarnings anyway, they don't even kiss

masterlist

(he's genuinely so fine i am unwell)

"This is all your fault", you huff, crossing your arms as you stare at the array of candies in front of you.

"How's any of this my fucking fault?", Tangerine seethes, trying to keep his voice down somewhat (which is already better than what he does most times), but hardly succeeding.

"If you'd listened to me, I wouldn't have been backed into that corner in the first place and Lemon wouldn't have had to come save me", you bite back, narrowing your eyes as you pluck a bag of gummies off the shelf. "Ergo, he wouldn't have got hurt."

"Lemon likes the red ones better", Tangerine grunts, taking a step closer to you as an elderly couple turns the corner and pushes their cart into your aisle. "And 'ergo' what the fuck do you mean, love? I wasn't the one to fucking break his leg."

"You don't use ergo like that", you correct, tilting your head back to him as if that nickname hadn't just sent your heart into cardiac arrest. "Also, I'm pretty sure Lemon likes the blue ones just fine."

"Yeah, just fine, but he likes the red ones better, that's the difference."

Tangerine reaches for the bag of red candy and his arm brushes your shoulder, immediately restarting your heartbeat with a deafeaning thump.

"I thought the red ones 'made his stomach feel funny' yesterday", you argue, even though you can already hear the way your resistance is crumbling as his eyes meet yours again, some of that feral fighting instinct in there that you recognise from missions.

"That was the green ones, love", he corrects, plucking the bag of blue candies from your grip and shoving it back into the shelf. You gasp in outrage. "Just listen to me for fucking once and take the goddamn red candy."

You put your hands on your hips and narrow your eyes at him.

"Oh, since when is the fucking problem me listening to you?", you seethe, your lips still parted, ready to shoot a whole tirade at him in the middle of this 24/7 supermarket when you're suddenly interrupted by a hearty chuckle to your left.

Tangerine's head snaps around a nanosecond before yours does.

"I'm sorry", the elderly lady says, her hair white as snow and her arm looped through what you guess to be her husband's. "I didn't want to interrupt you two, I just- I can remember how stressful that was, being young, just married, dealing with the little ones..."

"I'm sure if we'd had these twenty-four hour stores when we'd just had children, we would have stood right there arguing too", her husband laughs.

You blink at them helplessly for a few moments. What the fuck is happening? Hello? Marriage? Kids?

"It gets better", the woman chuckles. "We're happy and stress-free now, aren't we?"

Her husband hums in agreement and presses a kiss to her temple.

"And you look like a lovely couple", she goes on, smiling at you. "You'll manage this stage too."

This stage.

Oh, dear lord.

She's talking about this stage of being married. This stage of having young children. Because you're standing in a 24/7 supermarket candy aisle with Tangerine, arguing about which colour to get for Lemon, which she seems to have interpreted as a nickname for your son.

Your fucking son. Your and Tangerine's son. In your marriage.

"Oh, um", you stutter, brushing a hand through your hair as you stare at the couple, doing your hardest not to cast even a fucking glance Tangerine's way. Your cheeks are stinging with heat. You don't need him to see that. "Actually, we're not-"

"Not married yet", Tangerine interrupts, his hand flexing and clenching around his bag of candy. Any train of thought you'd previously had shatters completely and your head whips around to him after all - is that a faint dust of pink on his cheeks? Is it really what you think it is? Fuck, should your heart be hammering this fast and strong and loud?

"Ah", the woman grins. "How times have changed. We'd had to get married as soon as I was pregnant."

"Are you engaged, then?", her husband asks, raising his eyebrows and smiling pleasantly.

They're so calm. Meanwhile, your heart is doing somersaults in your chest.

"Uh", you say, not all that intelligently.

"Yeah", Tangerine rasps, his voice hoarse somehow. "Few months now."

You blink wordlessly at him. What the actual fuck is he doing? There's no reason to lie. None. You're not undercover.

"That's nice", the woman smiles. "Well, have a good night then."

They're already half-turned away when she looks back over her shoulder.

"Oh, and for those candies", she adds with a conspicuous grin. "Just take both. Let your son decide which he likes better when they're side by side."

You swallow.

"Uh, thanks", you mutter, unsure if they can even still hear. "Good night."

Tangerine drops the bag of candies into your cart. Then he's quiet. And you're quiet.

Too quiet.

For too long.

You don't know what the hell has just happened.

"Tangerine", you breathe, your voice low, and your eyes settle on him slowly. "Since when are we engaged?"

He grunts and drags his eyes away from you, grabbing your bag of blue candies off the shelf again and putting it in the cart with the other one.

"Since fucking never, love", he grumbles, just before his hands close around the handles of the cart. "But I wasn't about to say that, was I?"

"No?", you guess with a frown as you force yourself to move, to trail after him down the aisle. "Because?"

Tangerine turns to look at you like you're mad.

"Because they could've been fucking spies, love", he snarls, as though that's obvious and you're somehow dumb for not thinking of it.

"You're not serious."

He can't be serious.

But he stops the cart and turns to look at you, way too close and way too tall, and if you'd thought you had seen a blush on his cheeks before, it was definitely gone by now. There's that familiar dangerous glint in his eyes instead. Somehow, that puts you more at ease.

"Do you see me bloody laughing?", he seethes, his fingers clenching so hard around the handle that his knuckles turn white.

"I don't think I've ever seen you laugh", you mutter and swallow hard at the way his eyes fixate on yours. "You really made up a whole ass lie for an eighty-year old couple because you thought that they could be spies?"

Tangerine huffs and turns back, pushing the cart with even more ferocity now.

"Yes, love", he grunts.

Your stomach drops. You don't know why.

Instead of dwelling on it, you fiddle with the rings on your hands and fall in step with him.

"Well", you hum. "If you ever do buy me a ring, I don't want it in blue or in red."

[campingwiththecharmings]

Good Neighbors (7)

PART 6

AN: Hello lovely people. I'm so unbelievably sorry that this took OVER A YEAR to get out. Ugh. I'm so annoyed with myself. If you're still here, thank you so much for sticking with me, I know I've been pretty MIA recently. That being said, without further ado, here is the seventh smutlet in a series set after the events of Night Moves. I hope it's worth the wait lol.

Why should you care if Santi had someone over? What’s it matter that it was (apparently) an attractive woman? It doesn’t, it shouldn’t. You and Santi are just friends. Sure, you get naked together sometimes but there’s nothing else there, he doesn’t owe you anything, he’s not yours— And you’re not his.

(Un-beta’d)

Rated: M+ (this is smut so, i mean, you’ve been warned?) Words: 2,077 (can i still call them 'smutlets' if they're the length of a normal fic lmao) Pairing: Santiago “Pope” Garcia x F!Reader Warnings: pwp, kissing, ~*feelings*~ (ugh), a dash of angst, jealousy, neighbors with benefits AO3

——————

You can’t sleep, and much like all those months ago, it’s your stupid neighbor’s fault.

Your stupidly gorgeous, funny, sweet, wonderful neighbor, Santiago Garcia.

Sadly, the issue this time is not him playing his music too loud in the middle of the night. No. Instead the issue is something that shouldn’t even be an issue.

Ugh. How did you even get here?

Right. 3A. Yeah, this was all that bitch’s fault. If she’d just kept what she’d seen to herself, you’d be sleeping like a baby right now. But no, she’d had to go and open her big, fat mouth.

Why should you careif Santi had someone over? What’s it matter that it was (apparently) an attractive woman? It doesn’t, it shouldn’t. You and Santi are just friends. Sure, you get naked together sometimes but there’s nothing else there, he doesn’t owe you anything, he’s not yours—

And you’re not his.

A weight settles on your chest at the thought and you sigh. You turn on your side, looking at the clock on your bedside table; the glaring, red numbers feel like they’re burning a hole into your retinas. 

Almost 3 a.m. Just like the night you first met.

The longer you think about it, the worse you feel—was he fucking her too? Are you just one in a long line of women he has at his beck and call? Did you even mean anything to him or were you just the most convenient? 

Stop it, you tell yourself, you have no right to be jealous. Enough.

You scoff after a moment, shaking your head at your own thoughts. Jealous? Please, you weren’t jealous. That’d be stupid, right? Completely and utterly ridiculous.

You will yourself to sleep, closing your eyes and trying every technique you know to try and clear your mind.

After ten minutes, you throw your covers off with a frustrated groan and sit up, legs hanging off the side of your bed.

If there’s any hope of you getting any sleep tonight, you have to talk to him.

You shuffle quickly through your living room, out the front door, and into the hall. Before you can talk yourself out of it, you knock on his door, the sound echoing loudly down the empty hall. For a moment, you pray that he doesn’t answer, that he’s already fast asleep but you’re realistic enough to know that’s probably not what’s going to happen. You hear the drag and click of the door being unlocked and you tense slightly as it slowly swings inward.

Santiago squints out into the hall, a soft smile spreading on his lips when he sees it’s you. 

“Evening, hermosa,” he rasps, running a hand over his face. “Or, I guess I should say morning.”

“I can’t sleep,” you blurt, wincing slightly as you briefly avert your gaze. “Can we talk?”

You watch as his face shifts, his brow furrowing, head cocked slightly to the left as the smile melts away. He nods, stepping back to give you enough room to come in.

Your eyes sweep the room as you step over the threshold, searching for someone you know isn’t there (not anymore, anyway). He wouldn’t have let you in if she was.

“Everything okay?” he asks, gently touching your shoulder.

You don’t answer him right away, unsure how to even broach this topic. Santi doesn’t owe you anything, not even an explanation, really. He’s never made you any promises, never said you were the only one he was messing around with…never said he loves you.

Something sharp lodges in your chest at the thought and you close your eyes, breathing slowly in an effort to quell the panic rising in your throat.

He says your name, his voice soft, and the sharpness in your chest turns to an ache, an ache you’ve become all too familiar with recently. You push the feeling away, trying to focus on why you’d come here. 

The other woman. Right.

With a steadying breath, you turn to him, crossing your arms over your chest protectively.

“I heard you had a visitor today,” you say nonchalantly, as if this is a completely normal conversation to be having in the middle of the night.

His brow furrows again, this time in confusion. “A visitor?”

You nod in response, your jaw tight. For a moment he just stares at you, waiting for you to elaborate, but then his eyes light in realization. 

“Are you talking about Ana?”

You avert your gaze to the floor, the sharpness in your chest returning. Then a warm, low chuckle reaches your ears, the sound making your insides melt. God, do you love his laugh.

He steps closer, his fingers brushing against the underside of your chin, trying to return your eyes to his; the gentleness of his touch makes your chest ache.

“She’s just a friend, hermosa,” he explains, his voice low and soft.

Unfortunately, his words do nothing to alleviate your concerns.

“‘Just a friend’ like me?” you ask, your voice breaking despite the control you’re fighting so hard to maintain over yourself.

His eyes soften and a piece of you crumbles inside. You watch as his jaw clenches, his hands moving to cup your cheeks, holding you in place so you can’t look away from him again.

“No,” he whispers, shaking his head slightly, “Not like you.”

He holds your gaze, his eyes burning with an intensity you’ve never seen before. It makes your heart skip, your lips parting slightly at the insinuation. You want to believe it, want to believe that this thing between you is more than just sex, more even than friendship. You want to believe it, so you do…if only for tonight.

He must see whatever he’s searching for in your eyes because suddenly he’s kissing you, his lips gentle but sure as he pours everything he is and feels into it, into you. It’s different from the other times somehow, more intense, more serious, as though he’s trying to prove something. You cling to him, fingers twisting in his shirt as he slips his tongue between your lips. He steps closer, his left hand sliding down your neck and torso to settle on your hip. You sigh at the press of his body against yours, warm and solid, familiar. 

Without breaking the kiss, Santi guides you backwards, slowly steering you both in the direction of his couch. You pause when the backs of your knees touch the soft, cool leather, letting yourself get lost in the feel of him again. You slide your hands down his chest, slipping them beneath the hem of his shirt to his warm, soft skin. The coolness of your fingers makes him jump a little in surprise and you can’t help the smile that spreads on your lips. He smiles back, you can feel it as he kisses you, as he angles your head and licks into your mouth again, and it makes that now ever-present ache in your chest throb. 

When you finally part, it’s for air, your foreheads pressed together as you pant, trying to catch your breaths. He’s too far, you think. You want—no you need—to have him closer, need to feel his skin against yours, need his lips, his eyes, his hands, his everything. You need him. 

Your fingers toy with the hem of his shirt before slowly pushing it up his torso and then pulling it over his head. Santi’s eyes are glued to you, like he’s afraid to look away, afraid you’ll disappear if he does. You lean in, pressing a kiss against the hollow of his throat. Santi inhales shakily as you explore, slowly kissing a line down to his chest. He hisses when you flick your tongue over his nipples, his fingers clenching at your hip.

You wish you could live here, in this moment, this moment where there’s nothing else but you and him together. 

After a moment, he pulls you back, pulls your mouth back to his, humming contentedly when you reconnect, as if you’ve been parted for years instead of just a few seconds. Santiago’s hands slip beneath the waistband of your pajama bottoms and panties, the warm, rough pads of his fingers scratching delightfully against your skin. Slowly, he pushes them down, dragging the fabric over your ass and hips before letting them fall at your feet. Unimpeded by your clothing, he cups your backside, gently kneading your cheeks with his strong fingers as he pulls your body against his.

Slowly, you undress each other, hands lingering, reverently caressing every inch of skin revealed. Once you’re bared to each other, Santi lays you down against the cushions of his couch. The cool leather makes you shiver, goosebumps breaking out and spreading over your body. He watches you for a moment, his eyes somewhat unreadable in the darkness of the room. You can feel his gaze on you, as he drags it slowly down your body, as if committing every bit of you to memory. Before you can say anything, he leans in, reclaiming your mouth as he situates his body over yours. 

He’s so warm, the weight of him comforting, familiar, as he settles between your legs. You moan softly as his hard cock brushes against your core, the sound muffled by his mouth on yours. He groans, slowly grinding against you, each brush of him sending sparks of pleasure up your spine. It feels like you’re on fire, like you’re about to burn up from the inside out. You need him, need him to fill you, to consume you. He seems to sense your need, shifting so the head of his cock is pressed against your entrance.

He breaks your kiss as he sinks inside you, his swollen lips parting in a silent groan as your body welcomes him home. For a moment, he doesn’t move, content just to bask in the warmth of you. He finds your lips again, his kiss languid and deep, as if he can’t get enough of you, as if he wants to swallow you whole. When he finally starts to move, it’s slow, his thrusts shallow but no less pleasurable. He keeps kissing you, stealing your breath, his hands are everywhere, touching, caressing, stoking the fire inside you. The moment feels endless, a blur of hands and lips and breathy moans. 

There’s something different about this time, something different in the air, in the energy between you both. Perhaps it's the pace, your usual frantic neediness traded for something so unhurried, yet still so passionate. It feels unreal, unlike anything you’ve ever experienced. It feels like love, though, you know it isn’t. 

It’s easy to forget, though, consumed by him as you are. He’s everything, he’s everywhere, all you can see, all you can feel, hear, smell, taste—

You shake as the tension twists in your gut, breathy moans escaping you with every push of his hips. He’s no better, jaw slack, eyes blown wide and dark, looking almost drunk as he so easily unravels you bit by bit. You’re so close, feeling as though you’ve been on the precipice for ages, ready to tumble over with the slightest nudge. He keeps you there, the steady push and pull of his hips drawing out your pleasure. Briefly you wonder if it’s possible to die from this, because you feel like you might. There are worse ways to go, you suppose.

Something in his eyes shifts as he moves over you, as if he’s made some important decision. He leans in, claiming your mouth once more, his kiss deep and filled with so much longing it takes your breath away. He finds your hands, splayed limply beside you on the couch, his fingers lacing with yours. He’s done it before, but somehow now it feels different, like it means more. You tell yourself you’re reading too much into it, into everything—he doesn’t feel the way you want him to, he doesn’t love you.

Your hands are still clasped when you come, his fingers gripping yours like a vice. He presses his forehead to yours as the euphoria washes over you like a tidal wave, the warmth of his breath gliding pleasantly over your skin. Then he kisses you, so gentle and sweet it makes your heart ache in your chest.

You know it’s not love, but maybe, just this once, it’s okay to pretend.

So you do.

If you enjoyed this, please let me know! I appreciate every single reblog and/or comment. Thank you. 💖

Series Masterlist 🌟 Main Masterlist

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PART 8 (coming soon)

[xoxoxkisses]

Snowman

Warnings: none

muichiro x reader

————————————————————————

As you were making breakfast, you happen to look out the window. To your surprise it was snowing. You loved the snow, I mean you were the snow hashira anyways. A big smile appeared on your face as you finished scrambling an egg.

You practically ran to your room to grab some winter clothes. You quickly grabbed your cotton filled uniform and your winter hat. As you were putting your boots on, you had looked out of your bedroom window. You had been lucky enough to have been gifted an estate overlooking the mountains, and your bedroom had a wall sized window. You watched as the snow covered the mountains and trees, you felt a sense of comfort.

You finished getting dressed and walked outside. Before you could have fun, you had to go to your best friend’s house. Muichiro surprisingly took a liking to you and was always by your side. Luckily, you didn’t live far from him, so your walk wasn’t long. It took about 7 minutes for you to arrive, and to your surprise Muichiro was already outside.

You waved at him as you came up the hill. “Hi mui!” A soft smile crept onto his face when he saw you. He walked halfway to meet you, and when the two of you were face to face he greeted you with a hug. “I figured you’d come, so I went ahead and got ready.” He said as he pulled away. You laughed as you acknowledged how much he knew you. “I came here to build a snowman.” He looked at you puzzled. “A snowman? Y/n we aren’t 5.” You rolled your eyes as you walked past him to begin building.

He quickly followed you and began working on the middle part. You had already finished the bottom part. “How did you already get that done?” You looked up at him. “It’s not hard, you’re just slow.” He chuckled. “Slow? I’m slow?” You nodded. You had turned for a split second before you felt a cold, wet feeling on the back of your head. You turned quickly to be met with the same feeling.

You took your hand to wipe the snow from your face. You saw Muichiro holding a bunch of snowballs with a sly smirk. You grinned as you grabbed a bunch of snow to make snowballs.

The snowman was quickly forgotten as the two of you had broke out in a snowball fight. It was a lot of fun, the two of you laughed at each other, and at yourself.

Somehow the two of you had crept up onto each other, and now you were both face to face. Both of you were breathing heavy and cold. “I never thought I’d say this, but do you want to go inside?” Muichiro sighed. “I never thought you’d ask.” The two of you walked in, and fortunately for you, Muichiro lent you one of his t shirts and pants. The two of you rested on his couch before you both slowly fell asleep.

————————————————————————

I’m finally backkkkk 🥳🥳

[my-rose-tinted-glasses]

Peaceful property is a bl even if it's not. It's also about so many other things although not really delivering on a consistent message.

I thought about adding my thoughts to this thread but it was getting long and I started to get sidetracked so I decided to just make my own post about it and share my thoughts on it. @lurkingshan @bengiyo and @twig-tea all made good point about why this show is faltering with its own themes, and @respectthepetty made a compelling argument that the show knows what its doing.

I think no one is wrong and I land somewhere in the middle with it. As in, depending on what I choose to care about. Much like @respectthepetty, I am bias about this show. For different reasons tho. I like Tay and New a lot so I lead with that instead of my critical thinking. just as a personal aside, I tend to do this when my brain and heart don't align. I ignore when my brain tells me that the show is doing something wrong so that I can enjoy the rest. This works particularly well with QL for some reason. I am after all a person who liked Dangerous Romance even when my brain kept trying to damper my enjoyment with logic. And also sometimes I'm a hypocrite and there's no reason for why I like a show and not another. Ok, there's usually a reason but it's most often not a good one, or a rational one at least. That's just how it is.

Anyway. Because of all the excellent points made by that post I decided to fully engage my brain and I've been thinking about what this show is trying to say and I agree that unfinished business is the main thing in the ghost stories but I would have to shut off my brain completely to not see how class factors into all of it as well.

The ghosts up until now, except the chef, were all lower class and one can argue that it played a part in how they died or what happened after. I'm not including episode 7 for reasons that I will explain in a bit. Even if Ride's unfinished business was about love, the fact that he was the only rider doing deliveries in the rain, at least to me, read as he was driven by the need to make money in the first place. Even in the chef's case, the customer that Peach basically poisoned was rich and it was a part of the headlines about it and the reason for the restaurant getting shut down. Also most of the individual stories didn't get deep into these issues, case of the week usual issues, but it was always an underlying theme. Also as @twig-tea said all the parallels work even better because this disparity also exists between Home and Peach.

All this gets me to how I started this post. This is a bl even if it isn't. The choice to include the tragic bl storyline in the middle of this, in my own brain, can only be explained if I believe this is a bl. (The tragic bit was thematically consistent with this show.) Specifically a gmmtv bl. Cause ultimately they have a tendency to forsake narrative consistency if it stops serving the main romance. It's also the only way I can explain having a bl pair mirroring the other bl pair on screen. So in that way it's consistent with gmmtv. Just brush aside anything that can get in the way of the couple not having a happy ending. This is also how I explain my biggest issue with it. Pangpang. She's the shipper. She's been the shipper from basically the start.

Home basically killed her brother, why would she be the driving force in getting him forgiven? Because of my previously admitted bias, I forgave Home almost immediately. It's New and he didn't mean it, it was an accident and he wanted to call for help and do the right thing but his family interfered and.... I could come up with a lot of reasons because I want to forgive him. So everything else can be ignored. But all this obviously doesn't apply to Pang. So it can only be the bl in the not a bl show.

Now, on full brainy mode, this last episode makes no sense with everything else this show has been saying until now. They used a branded pair to ignore any class disparity between our mains, since the last ghost story didn't really parallel that, and over the forgiveness part, and jump straight into Peach has forgiven Home and will probably now become his saviour. Don't even get me started on the fact that Peach is still broke but saving the rich dude that turned his life to crap will be the most important thing right now. I wonder if gmmtv has ever ignored class disparity between a main couple and instead focused on the richer dude's drama while ignoring the struggle of the other one, all in favour of the main romance and lovey dovey moments 🤔. But I guess I'll reserve full judgement on that until the next episode.

yeah, so basically this is where I am at with this show. My two sides are fighting but come next wednesday my brain will take the back seat for 45 minutes so I can enjoy Tay and New and after that maybe I'll think about it some more.

[atlabeth]

everything happens for a reason part 22 - zuko x fem!reader

I've been waiting on you

part 21 | masterlist | part 23

a/n: UHHH happy one year anniversary of me not updating!! i missed it by a day but honestly that's very in character. i kind of have no excuse for taking a year long break from this. lol. all i can really say is i lost all my avatar inspo and got really into a bunch of other things and poor little ehfar got left in the corner abandoned!!! but i could never abandon this it's my baby and even if it takes me 1000 years to finish it i will finish it. it's kind of embarrassing that it took so long for this to come out and it's a short filler chapter like who do i think i am.... but everyone is happy and on the beach and yn finally gets some clothes of her own after spending like 7 chapters in prison clothes. anyways enjoy (three more chapters left what?? will it take me 3 years who knows)

wc: 4.8k

warning(s): yn and zuko talk about their pasts and what theyve been through but overall this is a very fluffy chapter

chapter title from seasons (waiting on you) by future islands

The days after their arrival back to the island passed by with relative ease. 

Y/N practiced waterbending with Katara and Aang so she could work on getting the hang of it again. She’d been close to mastery before Ba Sing Se, and her muscle memory was stronger than she realized, but prison and the months without her bending had weakened her. Zuko continued working with Aang on his firebending under the looming deadline of the comet.

Sokka and Suki trained with each other too, working on their hand to hand and sword fighting, and Y/N would occasionally join in to stay sharp on what Suki had taught her back in prison. Her time without her bending made her realize how much she relied solely on it, and she never wanted to feel defenseless again. 

They continued to share stories every night over a campfire. They all had plenty to talk about after everything they’d been through, especially when Zuko had been against them for half the time, Suki was leading the Kyoshi Warriors, and Y/N was stuck behind bars. 

And of course, Zuko and Y/N spent as much time together as they possibly could. They were practically attached at the hip—sitting together at meals, watching one another bend on their breaks, training against each other the way they used to, exploring the island together, just being with each other. After everything they’d been through, Y/N thought they deserved it. 

Eventually though, it was decided that they had to leave. Being in Fire Nation territory, even in the middle of nowhere, was risky. They were running out of food and supplies in general, and the possibility that Fire Nation ships would still somehow discover them weighed on their minds. They couldn’t afford to get caught so far into their mission, especially with the traitor prince of the Fire Nation on their side. 

Zuko’s idea, however, was possibly even riskier. 

“Ember Island?” Y/N asked hesitantly. “That’s… bold.” 

“We’re already being bold by staying in Fire Nation territory,” Zuko said. “We’re safe from Azula for now, but it’s only a matter of time before she somehow finds us again.” He shrugged. “My family’s vacation home is the last spot anyone will think to look.” 

“I think it’s a great idea,” Sokka said. “It’ll be nice to not fight for our lives for a minute before we make the final push.” 

Aang adjusted his hold on the reins—they’d already packed up Appa and started flying before Zuko proposed his idea—and shrugged. “I’m okay with it. Zuko and I will be able to keep training, and you all can relax in an actual house.”

“And we’ll be able to go to the beach!” Toph exclaimed. “I’ve been meaning to work on my sandbending. And,” she grinned, “I’m betting none of you have heard of sandball fights.”

“We’re really getting ourselves into something,” Katara said dryly. 

Y/N smiled and she leaned into Zuko’s side. He wrapped his arm around her immediately and pulled her closer.

“I’ve always wondered what Ember Island was like,” Y/N mused. “I was always so jealous when you and Azula got to go there on vacation every summer and I was stuck at the palace.” 

“You weren’t missing much,” Zuko said wryly. “Yeah, there’s beaches, but mostly it was just unbearably hot.” He frowned. “My father still made me do work even when we were supposed to be on vacation. I’ve done a lot of swordfighting here.” 

“I missed you,” she said, and she knew that she would never get tired of seeing Zuko’s cheeks flush red. 

“Really?” he asked. “Even then?” 

“Especially then,” she clarified. “It wasn’t like I had much going on for me there. The palace was extremely boring without you.” 

“Spirits, you guys are gross,” Sokka groaned as he looked out at the sky. “Suki and I haven’t been like this, have we?” 

Katara chuckled. “You definitely have. You could barely stay off of each other when you got back from the Boiling Rock.” 

“Just imagine what they were like when they first got back together,” Zuko said with a frown. 

“Neither of you can say anything,” Toph asserted. “I can hear both of your heartbeats shoot up every time you’re around Y/N and Suki.” 

Zuko scowled, Sokka’s face flushed, and Suki and Y/N just smiled at each other. 

“So Ember Island is a yes?” Aang asked. When everyone nodded in agreement, he looked at Zuko. “I’m in need of your navigation skills, Sifu Hotman.” 

He groaned. “I told you to stop calling me that.” 

“I know,” Aang said cheerfully. 

Zuko just sighed, and he kissed Y/N on the cheek before he moved to sit next to Aang. She smiled, and she let her hand hang over the side of the saddle. 

“...I guess it is nice not seeing you two argue all the time,” Sokka said after a moment. 

“It’s nice that you two aren’t moping around all the time either,” Toph added. “That was kind of annoying.” 

“Imagine how I felt,” Y/N said, though it was absent minded as her gaze stayed on Zuko. 

“I don’t have to imagine it,” Toph said. “You were very clearly mopey.” 

“And when you weren’t mopey, you were angry,” Suki contributed. “You said you were imagining Zuko’s face whenever I taught you new moves at the Boiling Rock. You beat him up a lot there.” 

Sokka and Toph laughed, but it was a moment before she said anything. It took Katara saying her name for her to turn back around, and when Y/N did, she blinked for a moment. “What?” 

Katara chuckled, glancing at Zuko before she looked back at her. “We’re just glad you’re back.” 

Her expression instantly brightened as she smiled. “I’m glad to be back.” 

-

It didn’t take long for them to arrive at Ember Island—and if it did, Y/N was far too busy conversing with her friends and watching Zuko for it to matter. She grimaced as she slid off of Appa, one hand taking Zuko’s and the other wiping a bead of sweat from her forehead. 

“Spirits,” she mumbled, “I thought I was used to Fire Nation heat by now.” 

“Me too,” Sokka groaned. “But this is already worse than all the other places we’ve been to.” 

“Ember Island’s always been like this,” Zuko said. “The good news is that it’s Ember Island. There’s plenty of beaches—we’ve even got our own private one.” 

“Good for practicing waterbending,” Katara said with a glance at Aang. 

“Good for practicing all kinds of bending,” Zuko said. “You’re gonna need to practice your firebending every day if you want to stand a chance against my father. We’re running out of time and you’re nowhere close to being a master.” 

Aang frowned. “Way to bring down the mood, Zuko.” 

“I’m being realistic!” he defended. “You can’t just end one hundred years of war with some good luck and an optimistic mindset!” 

Sokka shrugged. “It’s worked for us so far.” 

Zuko opened his mouth to say something that would definitely cause an argument. Before he could, Y/N laughed, looping her arm through his and tugging him along. 

“Come on,” she said. “Show us around.” 

Zuko sighed, though his show of annoyance was negated as he pulled Y/N closer. “Fine. It is about time I’ve brought you here.” 

“Ugh.” Toph kicked at the sand with her foot. “I think Zuko’s just brought us along on his couples vacation.” 

“Oh, quiet,” she joked. “We’ve earned it.” 

Toph stuck her tongue out. “Doesn’t mean we can’t complain about it.” 

Y/N chuckled as they walked together, the rest of the group trailing behind them. 

“Spirits, Zuko,” Sokka marveled when they stepped inside the house. “This is huge.” 

“It is the summer home of the royal family,” he said dryly. “My father never settles for anything less than perfection. It also gave us more room to avoid each other when he was causing arguments.” 

“I can’t imagine that happened a lot,” Katara said sarcastically. 

“Never,” Zuko agreed with the same tone. “He almost burned down the place a few times.” 

Aang frowned. “Sounds like a great guy.” 

“I know you’re not a violence guy, but if there’s anyone you’d enjoy fighting, it’s my dad,” Zuko muttered. 

“I’ll do it for the good of the world,” Aang said. “Not because I’ll enjoy it.” 

Zuko grimaced and opened his mouth to say something, but Y/N interrupted once more before they could devolve into this conversation again. 

“Like Sokka said, this place is huge.” She placed a hand on Zuko’s arm. “Will we have our own rooms?” 

Zuko’s brows creased a bit, but he nodded after a moment. “Yeah. There should be enough for all of us.” 

“Suki and I can share,” Sokka said, stretching his arms out casually to reach one around Suki. She laughed and leaned her head against his chest, and he looked far too pleased with himself. “Tryna make up for lost time, y’know?” 

“Gross,” Toph scoffed. “I’ll take my own room, please.” 

Aang glanced at Katara for a moment before he cleared his throat and nodded at Zuko. “Yeah. Me too.” 

Katara was too busy looking at a mask sitting on a mantle. She picked it up and glanced back at Zuko. “What is this from?” 

“One of my mother’s favorite plays,” he said. “She was an actress before she married my father, and every time we came here, we’d always go see some shows. They gave her the mask of the lead character after the end of one production a few years ago, as thanks for her patronage.” 

“Oh, we should definitely go see a play while we’re here!” Y/N exclaimed. “I got my hands on some old play scripts when I was still working in the palace, and the other servants and I would spend hours reenacting our favorite parts.” She chuckled. “It would be nice to see actual actors do it.” 

“We should be able to carve out some time for that,” Zuko said. “Between all the training, of course.” 

“You are such a downer,” Aang groaned. 

“I’m seeing the full picture!” he defended. “We’ve still got a lot of work to do—just because we’re at our vacation home doesn’t mean we’re on vacation.”

“After all this is over, we definitely deserve a vacation,” Sokka muttered. “Before all the rebuilding and restructuring and relegislating starts…” The smile fell from his face. “Wow. We’re never gonna get a vacation.” 

“Oh, perk up, ponytail,” Toph said. “We’re going to end the endless war and defeat the undefeatable Fire Lord. If we want to take a vacation, no one can really stop us.” 

The smile reappeared with surprising quickness. “That’s true!” 

Zuko laughed softly. “Your rooms should be on the first floor. You can explore and divide the rooms yourselves. I,” he looked at Y/N, “want to show you something.”

She smiled as Zuko pulled her closer with an arm around her shoulder and made for the stairs, leaving a rapidly growing argument over room selection in their wake. 

“Do you think they’ll have decided by the time we get back down?” Zuko asked. 

Y/N shrugged. “This is the first time they’re sleeping in rooms instead of camping on the ground in… Spirits. Since Ba Sing Se, I think. I wouldn’t be surprised if they go at it all night.” 

He chuckled as they stopped in front of a room, and Zuko pushed open the door so they could walk in together. 

“This was my room whenever we came here,” he said. “I figured we could share it.” 

“This is the height of luxury,” Y/N commented, stepping out of Zuko’s embrace to run her hand over the sheets. Her lips quirked into a smile. “I can’t believe you slept on a bed like this every night.” 

“You’re telling me they don’t have this kind of stuff in the North?” Zuko asked wryly. 

“No,” she chuckled, “definitely not. We were more focused on not freezing.” 

“Well, we’re more focused on pointless displays of luxury,” he said, “so you’re not too far off.” 

Zuko ignited the tip of his finger and began lighting candles around the room, and Y/N glanced at him with amusement as she sat down on the bed. 

“Mood lighting,” he explained with the sliver of a smile. “I think we deserve some time alone after the past few days.” 

She pressed a hand to her chest. “You know the way straight to my heart.” 

Once he was done he sat down next to her, and Y/N intertwined their hands together and pulled him down so they were laying on their backs. She rested her head on Zuko’s chest and he moved his arm around her to keep her close, tracing lazy circles on her shoulder. 

“Wonderful mattress,” she sighed. “So this was what you were up to while I was sewing clothes and doing endless loads of laundry.” 

“I thought about you a lot more than you probably think,” Zuko said. She turned her head a bit to look at him, slightly surprised, and he shrugged. “Honestly? When we were kids, I thought about you pretty much constantly. My father always told me not to talk to servants, but I didn’t see you as anything other than my friend. You were… kind of my only normal friend.” 

“Well, you were kind of my only friend, period. All the other servants were way older—they just felt like a different version of my mom.” Y/N’s gaze rose to the ceiling. “I wonder how they’re all doing.” 

“They should be okay,” Zuko said. “No one really caused as much trouble as we did.” 

Y/N laughed as her gaze flitted around the room, taking in all the details. A portrait of the royal family hung on the wall, while a much smaller, lone portrait of Zuko sat on a desk in the corner. He didn’t look very happy, but she couldn’t imagine sitting for that many paintings as a child was fun. What looked to be a half-finished message sat on the desk, the ends of the scroll rolling up and obscuring most of the inked letters. A neat stack of towels and blankets were on top of a clothing chest in the other corner, and she chuckled a bit. In her experience of doing his laundry in their youth, it seemed to be something he still hadn’t grown out of. 

“I can practically see little Zuko running in here after a day at the beach,” she mused. “The ends of his clothes singed from fighting with Azula, his hair drenched from swimming, getting sand all over the sheets.” 

“I wasn’t that messy of a child,” he complained. “I… I did come home with my clothes singed a couple times, though.” 

She chuckled. “I know. My mother had to fix a lot of your outfits because of it.” 

“It’s not my fault that ‘hide and blast’ was her idea of fun!” he defended. 

“Hide and blast?” 

“One person hides, the other person searches. By… blasting fire everywhere.” Zuko shook his head. “I don’t know all kids around the Fire Nation were as crazy as us or if Azula invented it herself.” 

“...Yeah,” Y/N said with a slight laugh. “We definitely didn’t play that in my village.” 

“Of course you didn’t,” he said. “None of you were firebenders.” 

“I was the only waterbender in the village though,” she said. “There were a couple other earthbender kids, but it made me feel so special. We would always play together and try to mix our bending together.” A small yet wistful smile tugged at her lips. “That feels like forever ago, though.” 

“I know what you mean,” Zuko murmured. “I was banished three years ago, but a lifetime has changed since then.” 

“For the better?” Y/N murmured. 

She could feel Zuko nod. “Definitely.” 

Their door was then pushed open more, and Suki poked her head in through the gap. A grin appeared on her face at their closeness. 

“I see the lovebirds are making themselves at home,” she mused. 

Y/N laughed as she sat up, pulling Zuko with her. She smiled at the sight of his flushed cheeks. “We’re trying.” 

“We believe in knocking here in the Fire Nation,” Zuko grumbled. 

“The door was open,” Suki said cheerfully. “And I’d like to steal your girl for an afternoon outing.” 

Her eyebrows shot up. “What for?” 

“Well, I’d like to explore the island some, and I figure we’re the lowest profile out of our whole group,” she said. “We’ve also missed out on some shopping while we were stuck in prison—we’ve gotta get our hands on some Fire Nation clothes.” 

Y/N’s eyes lit up. “That’s a great idea! Leya’s dress is beautiful, but Earth Kingdom clothing sticks out a bit more than I want.” 

“And I’m in literal prison clothes,” Suki said. “The sooner we’re in red, the better.” 

“That’s… probably smart,” Zuko amended. “There’s some gold pieces in my bag. It should be more than enough for both of you.” 

“Are you sure?” Y/N frowned. “You don’t have to—” 

“You think I didn’t take a bunch of money from the palace before I left?” Zuko asked wryly. “Don’t worry about it.” 

Suki’s smile grew. “Just call it reparations.” 

Zuko huffed a laugh, but Y/N cut him off as she pulled him in for a kiss. 

“You’ll be alright while we’re gone?” 

“Of course,” he said. “This is my home, after all. If anything, I should be asking you that.” 

“I’ve got the leader of the Kyoshi Warriors with me,” Y/N said. “If anyone decides to mess with us, it’s going to be their problem—not ours.” 

Suki laughed and gestured with her head, and Y/N stood up and started walking backwards. “I’ll see you later—try to have some fun here.” 

“I don’t have fun,” he called out as she was walking out, and she just shook her head with a smile. 

“You’re really dating a ball of sunshine there, aren’t you?” Suki joked. 

Y/N bit back her growing smile. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.” 

-

The rest of the day went by in a breeze. 

Y/N and Suki spent a few hours in town, chatting and shopping and even doing some reconnaissance at the end, just to make sure they were truly undercover at the vacation home. Doing rookie spy work with a Kyoshi Warrior was surprisingly just as fun as the shopping part—and after what she and Zuko did to free her village, it was surprisingly easy. 

The sun was still high in the sky when they got back, dressed head to toe in Fire Nation finery. Zuko and Aang were in the midst of training when the two of them went around back to find their friends, and when he saw Y/N, his fire died out and his eyes nearly popped out of his head. 

(“Yeah,” Zuko had stammered when she asked his opinion, “You look really good.”

“Thanks,” she said, and she felt the heat rush to her cheeks. “I feel pretty good.”

“Fire Nation clothes suit you,” he said, and he pulled her into a kiss. “It’s about time you’ve gotten some.”

“Technically, I wore them for a few months,” she said wryly. “Prison clothes and all.”

Zuko scoffed. “That doesn’t count.”

“And I wore them for most of my childhood,” she mused. “Servant clothes and all.” 

“That counts even less!” he insisted. 

“But thank you,” Y/N finally said with a smile. “I was hoping you would like them.” 

It was an effort to bite back her joy every time Zuko would sneak a look at her while they continued their training.) 

The rest of the day was just mostly spent getting used to everything. The last time the vacation home had been occupied was when Zuko, Azula, Mai, and Ty Lee visited, so a lot of adjustments needed to be made. 

Katara insisted on washing all the sheets, and Y/N decided to join in because of her waterbending—Aang wanted to talk with Katara, Zuko wanted to be with Y/N, Toph wanted to ask him a bunch of questions about Ember Island, and Sokka didn’t want to be left out, so soon enough, the seven of them were all sitting on the steps of the house doing laundry and telling stories. 

Soon enough, the sun had set and the house had been cleaned what felt like ten times over. Everyone had retired to their own devices except for Y/N and Zuko, who were walking along the shore arm in arm. 

“I think I like beaches,” she mused. “The nearest ocean had no beach back home, and all we had in the North was ice. You Fire Nation folk are lucky.” 

Zuko chuckled. “I don’t know if it’s luck. We’re just one big island with a lot of humidity.” 

“Still,” she leaned her head on his shoulder, “it’s nice. We should visit here together once all this is over.” 

“Of course,” he nodded. “I know I’m going to be the Fire Lord if all goes well, but there’s going to be a lot of diplomacy trips.” She felt his eyes on her. “You can join me on all of them.” 

“Of course,” she repeated. “The Fire Lord’s Earth Kingdom-born, waterbending girlfriend will be so welcome.” 

“If you’ve learned one thing through all of this, it should be that I don’t care what anyone thinks when it comes to you,” Zuko said. “I want you there with me. You want to be there with me. That’s reason enough.” 

Y/N chuckled, and she ran her thumb over Zuko’s knuckles. His hands housed callouses, borne from hundreds of hours of explosive firebending and sword-fighting and years of life on the road. She always wondered how hands that treated her so softly, that revered her, were so capable of violence. 

“I know there’s going to be a lot of expectations for us,” she said. “Especially once you take the throne. But I— I’d like to take things as slow as we can.” 

“Of course.” Zuko squeezed her hand, his brows creasing. “I don’t care what anyone says or wants or expects. I love you, Y/N—we’ll go at our own pace.” 

“It’s just because we’ve spent the past year trying to kill each other,” Y/N said with a nervous laugh. “If we could spend this next year being in love with each other, that would be really great.” 

That actually got a laugh out of Zuko, and he gestured with his head towards the sand. When they sat down, he pulled her into his side. They fit perfectly together. 

“Don’t worry,” he murmured. “I think we’ve already gotten a headstart on that.”

“Good,” she said. 

Y/N sighed as she moved closer into Zuko’s embrace, his warmth a shield from the cool night breeze. She’d always run cold, and having a personal hearth made things much easier. 

“I wish we didn’t have to go through so much to end up with each other,” she murmured. 

“Believe me,” Zuko sighed, “I know.” 

“But my mother always told me that everything happens for a reason,” Y/N said. “And… I guess she’s right. Because I don’t think we would be here if all this hadn’t happened.” Something inside of her twisted, and though she tried to suppress it, the words came out before she could really think about it. “And sometimes I— I wonder why I’m still here.” 

He frowned slightly, allowing a short glance down at her. “What do you mean?” 

“I mean… you know what I’ve had to go through to get here. My village, the palace, the North, this journey with Aang, the capital prison, the Boiling Rock…” she shook her head. “Countless others have died or gotten hurt trying to protect me or save me. Our group— we were the first ones ever to escape from the Boiling Rock. So why do I get to be here? Why is my father gone, but I’m still here? I don’t deserve it more than he did. I certainly don’t deserve it more than Yue. So… I don’t know. Sometimes I just can’t understand why I’m the one that got to make it when so many others haven’t.” 

“Don’t say that,” Zuko urged. 

“It’s not the way you think,” Y/N said honestly. “It just feels like we’ve beaten every single odd.” 

“Maybe we have,” he said, “but it’s certainly not out of luck, or chance.” Zuko took her hand and intertwined their fingers together, giving her hand a squeeze. “You fought every step of the way to get here—a lot of the time, you were fighting against me. You’ve earned every good thing you’ve gotten, Y/N, and I think I might spend the rest of my life trying to be someone worthy of you.” 

“Zuko,” she lamented, “you already are.” 

“It’s not the way you think,” he echoed wryly. “I’ve loved you since the beginning, and despite everything, you still love me too. You kept giving me chances because you believed in me for some stupid reason. I wouldn’t be where I am without that—without you. I want to be the best version of myself every day so you know you made the right choice.” 

Y/N felt the heat rush to her cheeks as she smiled, squeezing his hand back. Nowadays, they were almost always touching in some way. Tonight reminded her why—she never felt more comforted, more at peace, then when she was with Zuko. 

“You… kind of just hit my next point,” she said with a nervous chuckle, curling into his side further. 

“Don’t tell me it’s more self-doubt,” Zuko said. 

“I can’t help it!” she defended. “I— I just have to make sure.” 

“Of what?” 

“That…” Y/N paused, her mouth suddenly dry. “That I’m still the one you want. Even after all that’s happened. After all that’s going to happen.” 

Zuko frowned, and he took her other hand, lacing their fingers together.  “Of course. Y/N, it’s always been you. It’s been true forever, even if I haven’t always known it.” 

“It’s not going to be easy,” she said softly. “I’m Water Tribe and Earth Kingdom. Your people aren’t just going to accept that, especially with you as their leader.” 

Zuko actually laughed at that, and he gave her a sideways smile. Months ago, staring into his hardened eyes used to bring her close to tears. Seeing him smile now, reassuring doubts that seemed so pointless in the face of his love—even after everything, Y/N considered herself the luckiest girl in the world. 

“Y/N, we’ve gone across the whole world doing things no one ever has,” Zuko said. “The seven of us are going to end a war that’s been going on for a century. Aang is going to defeat my father, and he shouldn’t even be alive. We’ve beat every single odd against us. I think getting my people to like you will be the easiest thing we have to handle.” 

“You think so?” she asked. The tension had dissolved some from her shoulders, her worries dissuading with each honeyed word. 

“I know so,” Zuko assured. “I’m gonna have to change the Fire Nation from the ground up. There’s no one else I’d want by my side while I do it. My people will see you the way I do, and they’ll love you just as much.” 

Y/N leaned closer and pressed a kiss to his lips. Sometimes she still couldn’t get over the fact that she could just… do that. Just kiss him, just smile with him, just be happy with him. Yue shone down on them as she pulled away, Zuko’s features glowing in the moonlight, and Y/N hoped her friend knew she was so much of the reason she’d gotten here. 

Happiness seemed out of reach, out of her cards entirely, for such a long time, and when she had it, it always felt like such a precarious thing. Sometimes she still remembered those days in the tea shop, the night in the catacombs. 

But with Zuko finally by her side, it was a tangible thing. Something she deserved. Something she already had. 

“We’ll do it all together,” she murmured. 

“Together,” Zuko agreed. 

And she laid back down on the sand, bringing Zuko with her. He pulled her closer, tucked into his side as he wrapped his arm around her. They laid there in silence, Zuko’s warmth heating her from the inside out, staring up at the starry night sky and reveling in the feeling of just being with each other. 

Together.

-

i'll tag ppl here because it's been uhhhhhh fucking YEAR and everyone's prob forgotten it exists and i also did tag lists while this was coming out but please do not ask to be added bc i dont do them anymore!!

ehfar tags: @chandies-sideblog @zacatecanaaaa @anzanity @randomthingssssss @escapingthoughtsandsecrets @shanksfav @shephard17895 @ilovespideyyy @whats-my-question @selfship-mishaps @ilistentotayswifttocope @i-make-questionable-choices @3leni @thatobsessedreader @lostgreekgod @oriontingz @zerode-unhinged @badpvn @mimi-sanisanidiot @adhdhufflepuff @aquaamethyst96 @hollyismentallyillhelp @holypoetrygarden @islandgayneery @pitrii-petra @jinxed-jk @veras-fanfic-reblogs @cloud-9ine @lucifersidepiece @kiskzawagnerwhore @froggi-00 @eajalova @mrsyixingunicorn10 @xxxxxxdelenaxxxxxx @cafesho @the-natureofme @whoevenfrickinknows @a-bit-late @zukowantshishonourback @settlebackeasy @jemssafespace @wildwallflower24 @calmoistorm @mich1551-blog @inutheangel @sagemastah @avrilh

[mistystepmoonbeam]

Reborn into BG3: Chapter 7

You're reborn into BG3 with only the memory of your past life. Now you're Tav's companion on his journey, and must learn about yourself as much as your new reality.

Chapter 7: To the goblin camp!

Word count: 2.1K

The next morning you’re exhausted and nauseated.  You aren’t sure how much blood Astarion took but it was enough to get Tav flitting around you, his mother duck feathers ruffled.  

It’s hard not to look at Astarion as you try to gauge the vampire’s attitude—does he want to tell the others?  After feeding on Tav the others just seemed to know in the morning once you start talking to him, so you’re at a loss for words stuck between wanting to tell the truth, and wanting to earn Astarion’s trust.

“Looks like you and Astarion had a late night last night,” Karlach interjects with a wide grin.  “Saw him slinking out of your tent in the wee morning hours.  Gotta say I’m a little jealous—of both of you I mean.  Getting to touch another person like that…”

Gale chokes on his water, sputtering and coughing behind you. 

“I don’t think that’s what they were doing, Karlach,” Shadowheart says.  “Unless it was before he took a bite.”

Karlach laughs.  “Isn’t biting part of the fun?”

“Biting?” Tav questions.

You lift your arm, expecting to see dried blood and two little holes in your wrist but it’s completely normal.  Even whatever blood hadn’t made it into Astarion’s mouth was nowhere to be seen.

Shadowheart reveals, “I healed the wound and cleaned up the blood.  Astarion didn’t want to be blamed for you bleeding out in the middle of the night.  Nor did I.”

“Thanks,” you respond, eyes still on your wrist.  If you didn’t feel like throwing up it’s like it never even happened.

Gale appears at your side.  “To each their own, I always say, but if it leads to such dire circumstances perhaps you should find yourself a more suitable partner.”

“For the love of—“ Astarion cries out.  “We didn’t have sex!  I fed—I’m a…I’m a vampire.”

That little admission didn’t sound intentional, but you’re glad to have the attention on him. 

He must have told Shadowheart because she’s the only one that isn’t displaying shock, confusion, curiosity, or disgust.  

“But you’re in the sun.”  Karlach is first to break the quiet.

There’s a discussion about what the parasite is capable of, resulting in Karlach complaining, “So you can walk in the sun but I still can’t touch anyone?  Seems unfair.”

Tav grabs you into a one-armed hug, nearly slamming you against his chest as he points his other hand at Astarion.  “You feed off me next time!  I have more blood, I can afford it.”

“Isn’t it better if he feeds on me?” you ask into the tieflings chest.  “Since I’m not going out and fighting off goblins and spiders?”

Your dream comes back to you—talking around the fire, learning magic with Gale…but you can’t decipher which is memory and which is the dream.  You focus on it, knowing that Tav had found the amethyst and was tossing it around like a toy only to be scolded by Gale.  But no book.  Maybe that was why you hadn’t felt anything from it in the dream—there was no memory to pull from.  You find yourself a little disappointed by the fact that Gale hadn’t offered to test your magic but quickly push away the feeling.

You push Tav away, too.  “Besides, I’m fine.  I’m not that important here anyway so if Astarion needs to feed on me now and again he’s welcome to.”

“Thank you, darling,” Astarion says, “but I’m sure that won’t be necessary.”

After that the group forces you to consume as much fruit as possible in a single sitting.  Soon enough your nausea isn’t from blood loss but overeating, and you’re shooing away the worriers—Tav, Gale, and Karlach. 

“Don’t you guys have somewhere to be?  Halsin is still out there.”  There’s a pang in your chest knowing he’s in the goblin camp.

“That’s true.”  Tav sighs.  “You should come with us.”

You pause, wondering if you looked healthier than you felt.  “…why?”

“It’ll be fun?  And when you lose blood it’s better to be out and about.”

“That doesn’t sound remotely right,” you reply.  Tav is kneeling beside you, eyes large and watery as they look into your own.  Can tieflings be half puppy?  You have to stop yourself from agreeing to his request on the spot.  “I don’t want to slow you guys down.  Or get one of you killed.  Or die.”

“We aren’t going to be fighting, they’re going to let us in.”

There’s too many variables and you’re forced to repeat, “Why?”

“We went back and got Sazza, the goblin you saved,” Tav explains.

“She was grateful enough to offer us an introduction to her tribe and leaders,” Gale says.  “I’m sure your presence will grease the wheels, so to speak.” 

You conceded, if only after Tav gave you another small health potion.

You set out with more party members than you thought you would—Tav, Karlach, Gale, and Astarion.  You hope Wyll would be enough of a buffer for Shadowheart and Lae’zel as they search the upper roads for signs of the githyanki.  It’s strange to see the camp split up, but it makes more sense than leaving people to sit around all day. Granted, you’d love to be sitting right now as you approach the bridge leading into the goblin camp.  It’s not just the fatigue, or the anxiety of being surrounded by goblins, but knowing what will happen when they cross the bridge.  When you cross the bridge.  And what it means if nothing happens. You hadn’t actually seen the device Shadowheart held and she wasn’t even here right now…

“It will be okay,” Gale says quietly.  You’d lagged back far enough for him to notice, and stay near you.  “You’ve seen just how charming our fearless leader is.”

You force your lips into a shaky smile and nod.  With Gale at your side you catch up to the others as they’re about to cross the bridge into the ruined shrine.  The spiky barricades aren’t nearly as threatening as what’s about to come. 

Tav sets one foot on the bridge, then Karlach, Astarion, Gale…you.  Your leader is halfway across when you briefly think you might be in the clear, until he falls to his knees.  He grunts in pain, holding his head as the others follow suit, all of them going down at the same time beneath the pressure of the Absolute.  

You flinch back and…nothing.  You’re fine.  You hear no voice, feel no pain in your body, other than what you had before, and watch while the others shiver and groan, listening to the Absolute's message about the chosen three.  You grip your staff as you watch with wide eyes, heart clenching, unable to help them or understand why you aren’t included.  But the tadpole in your head doesn’t stir, not even when the relic shoots out of Tav’s bag and saves them from the Absolute’s control.  It glows orange as it floats above Tav until he can grab it, releasing the group.

“What in the bloody Hells was that?” Astarion shouts.

They’re each breathing heavy as they stand, shaking their heads in hopes of clearing their minds.  

“I think that was the Absolute,” Gale suggests, “and her chosen.”

“Whatever it was, that thing protected us.”  Karlach’s eyes are in the Githyanki device in Tav’s hands.  He shifts it between his fingers but it doesn’t react, so he puts it back into the bag at his waist.

And nobody questions you.  Being the last one behind, they seem to assume you’d heard the voice and seen the vision, too.  You’ve never been so grateful to be an unimportant extra.

You try not to let your exhaustion show in front of the goblins.  Your body and mind both feel like there’s a heavy weight on them, pushing you towards the ground until your knees want to buckle.  You’re using the staff to help keep you upright, and blame everything on blood loss and anxiety.  

Thankfully Gale was right about Tav’s charisma and you get inside the temple with little trouble.  The trouble being dragging Tav away from chicken chasing.  They have a chicken, not an owlbear, and the only other human there is Volo so you’re not sure what route was taken yesterday.  Nobody had mentioned an owlbear, meaning they had skipped past the cave…or perhaps didn’t want to tell you about killing the cub.

Regardless, apparently chicken chasing is as fun for Tav as it is for the goblins, and you’re only able to get him away and into the temple by promising you’ll give it a try when you’re feeling better. 

Once inside and past the guards, you see Priestess Gut.  Her presence is more imposing than her stature suggests and there’s a crackling fear that runs through your body when her eyes fall on you.  Tav takes the lead, denying the branding after a quick meeting of the worms, and the Priestess invites him elsewhere. 

“Not that one, though,” she says, looking at you.  “That one’s not a True Soul, been abandoned by the Absolute.  They’ll stay locked up until we’re done.”

“Huh?”  It’s all you can think to say as two goblins with pikes and shields approach you.  They don’t get close enough to touch you before the others step to your aid, which puts the rest of the surrounding goblins on alert, drawing their own weapons.

“Not gonna happen,” Karlach announces.

“Put your weapons down while I’m bein’ nice,” Priestess Gut orders.  “I could just have you all killed on the spot but I’m feeling generous–you’ll all walk out of here fine but that one stays in the cage until we’re done.”

Tensions rise when she spits out the words “that one”, like you’re some gnat needing to be squished.  Your companions don’t lower their weapons, and neither do the goblins.  You know how this fight goes, you know it can be won when turns are taken but right now there are no turns.  No waiting.

“I’ll go!” you shout.  You hold your staff out to Gale, cursing the slight tremble in your hands and voice.  “It’s just for a bit.  I’ll wait for you guys in…prison.”

“You don’t have to do this,” Gale whispers.  He only takes your staff when you shake your head.

Karlach and Tav seem about to argue, fight even, before the goblins can react, but you shake your head at them as well.  I’ll be fine, you think.  You wish you understood how to use the tadpoles to send messages, but maybe it went through anyway because they all holster their weapons.  Even Astarion, whom you’d hadn’t realised was willing to fight on your behalf as well, returns his daggers to their holsters.

“Just uh, don’t be too long, okay?”  You try not to think about the people the goblins are cooking outside, or that the butcher is in the same place you’re about to go.  You don’t look back at anyone as you’re taken away, hoping you didn’t just sentence yourself to death.

And it did feel like a death sentence walking past all the goblins.  But it was a little exciting, too.  The heavy beat of your heart couldn’t decide if it was from dread or a morbid interest in the creatures that barely came to your waist.  While still in sight of your companions nobody said a word to you.  You think the entire journey is going to be silent when a goblin shouts, “Hold up, eh?”

You and the guards halt, turning to the source of the voice.  Sazza.  She eyes you, but she isn’t what you’re wary of right now.  Beside her floats the scrying eye.

When the game says looking at it is like falling into an inky black pool, it’s not wrong.  You waver a moment as the hairs on the back of your neck raise, the feeling of being watched coming over you.  But it’s a different kind of watch than the goblins, more predatory.  If that was possible.

“What d’ya want?” one escort says.

“This thing flew right over when it saw this one,” Sazza explains with a wave at you.  “Guess it likes ya.  I should probably say thanks by the way, for takin’ the arrow.”

She doesn’t actually thank you.  

The scrying eye spins around you, floating up and down as if taking stock of you, kind of like when Gale first came out of the portal.  Was it interested in your coat, too?  Soon enough it stays in front of your face, examining your features.  You don’t have an option menu before you, and with a waver in your voice you say, “Uh, hello?”

The eye vibrates, or shakes, or maybe it shivers.  

“S’weird,” Sazza says, watching the eye.  Nobody can disagree with that.

“C’mon,” your other escort says.  “Don’t care if that things watchin’, gotta get the prisoner downstairs.”

They begin to lead you towards the worg pens and the eye follows you.  The only reason it leaves your side it when the door to the pens slams shut before it can get inside.

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