#anyways this is like what being 27 is like for me i'm excited about getting a big water bottle and carrying case and i sit outside and read

[clowngremlin]

ordered a really big water bottle that comes with like a special case that has a strap on it so i can go for my walks without having to either carry my water bottle in my hands (heavy and often times annoying because i only have one free hand to do stuff with) or bring my backpack with me (often times overheats me when it's warm out and like if i'm just going for a walk around my grandma's neighbourhood or the area around my house, it's overkill because i don't need an entire backpack when most of my things fit in my fanny pack) and i am very excited about it......

[reidmania]

use somebody | spencer reid

part two

summary; spencer doesn’t believe someone like you could ever like someone like him, but he would do anything for a chance.

warnings; fem!reader, reader is described as being really really kind, bau!worker reader, fluff (slight angst bc spencer doubts himself) reader is a bundle of joy idk, spencer is absolutely disgustingly in love with reader. reader has a dog ( a golden retriever ) reader IS A BOOK LOVER, reader is shorter than spencer., no love confession but like there basically is. maybe a part two coming idk!

an; this is based off use somebody by kings of leon bc that song just AHHHH

‘I've been roamin' around, always lookin' down at all I see, painted faces fill the places I can't reach. You know that I could use somebody, you know that I could use somebody, someone like you and all you know and how you speak, countless lovers under cover of the street, you know that I could use somebody, you know that I could use somebody. Someone like you, off in the night, while you live it up, I'm off to sleep, wagin' wars to shape the poet and the beat. I hope it's gonna make you notice, I hope it's gonna make you notice someone like me’

If there was a single light in a room, it would be your smile. Spencer had decided that the minute you introduced yourself to him on your first day, your wide smile was the first thing he noticed, then your kind voice — ever since Spencer Reid’s heart had your name written all over it and you had no idea.

You had been talking to Emily, your hands flinging around the more excited you got about whatever it was you were talking about, you were still smiling when Spencer approached with furrowed eyebrows after Emily had noticed him in the doorway and called him over to introduce himself to the team newest member.

You had introduced yourself with probably the widest, and sweetest grin he had ever seen. He almost forgot about the amount of germs spread through hand shaking when you offered him yours. He was pretty sure he felt the most embarrassment and disappointment when he didn’t forget — and turned down your handshake with his name and a silly ramble about what your name means historically.

He didn’t miss the way your smile never dampened — not even after his rejection of your offered hand, not during his embarrassingly long ramble, not as you listened intriguingly and then told him how cool it was that he just knew that off the top of his head.

That was a year, forty three days, 16 hours and 27 minutes ago — not that Spencer was counting. But he definitely was.

Your kindness won his heart from that moment. Your smile became his moral support during a particularly tough case. It seemed all the less tense when you would meet his eyes from across the room and offer him the sweetest smile. Your small gifts you left around for each member of the team became what he looked forward to and the end of every week — each more thoughtful than the last.

Spencer had kept the collection of small gifts you had given him on the shelf of his bedroom. Each one was specific to him. If someone on the team had mentioned wanting something or something they liked — at the end of the week it would be sitting on their desk with a little pink sticky note and a small ‘I hope you like it!’ in your hand writing.

He noticed that a lot of the time your gifts for him reference whatever he had rambled about the most that week, because he never explicitly told you he wanted anything or liked something because he knew you would go out of your way to get him it — you however found a way anyways.

Doctor who figurines, books, dvd’s. one week you had noticed him fidgeting more than normal and on the friday evening you had left a small collection of different fidget toys for him, with the same pink sticky note that wrote, ‘Picking at your skin is bad!! it can lead to infections and sometimes if you do it too much you could end up needing surgery. (I dont know if thats true, doctor google wasn’t helpful!) I hope these help’

He hadn’t picked at his skin since, if he was fidgeting it was with one of the small metal fidgets you had gifted him.

“Good morning!” You chirped — suddenly the room seemed brighter as you walked into the bullpen, your bag was slung over your shoulders as you made your way towards your desk. You turned your head to offer Spencer a sweet smile.

He returned it, lifting his hand to wiggle his fingers in a gentle waving. A habit he had picked up from you. You never just waved like everyone else did, instead you just held up your hand and wiggled your fingers. When you were asked about it you had smiled and shrugged and said it seemed like your fingers were dancing.

Spencer was pretty sure it was the sweetest reasoning for something he had even heard, but maybe that was just the fact it was coming from you.

“Did you like the dvd I gave you on Friday? The documentary one — if you have even watched it yet! I thought it was interesting!!” You said as you placed your bag on your desk. He thought his heart was going to jump out of his chest at the way your hair fell over your face when your head dropped down to look at your desk.

He shuffled slightly at his desk to sit up a little bit straighter. “I watched it.” He stated. Any dvd you gave him he watched the night he had got it. This one particularly — he had known all of the information that was in it, but it didn’t stop him from enjoying it any less — because you liked it enough to recommend it to him.

“I thought it was interesting.” He nodded, you lifted your head and smiled and he started to wonder at what point that sweet smile would stop having an effect on him. He partly hoped it never would. “I watched another one yesterday. I think you’d like it.” He said, not mentioning the fact he had paid extra attention to all of it, making sure it included something you were interested in, just so he could recommend it to you then talk to you about it the next day.

You grinned, leaning against your desk as you looked at him. He was thankful your desk was so close to his. That you were so close to him. Close enough to have a conversation without having to talk across the room, close enough that he could lean over and help with whatever you needed if you asked.

“The documentaries you watch might be a little above my expertise. I think I’ll just be confused the entire time” You giggled out, tilting your head slightly to the side. He shook his head instantly, eyes following the hair that fell the way your head tilted, down your shoulder.

“You’re smart, you’d understand.” He said.

You smiled and raised your eyebrow slightly, “I’m not smart like you’re smart, Spence.” You shook your head, just as he had a few minutes ago.

He shrugged, “Not many people are” It came out cockier than he intended, he was about to apologise for how it sounded before he heard you let out a gutty laugh. A real laugh. “If- If you’d like.. We uh- We could watch it together and I could explain to you whatever you don’t understand” He added, then he realised he had basically just invited you to hang out with him. Just you and him, in an unprofessional setting. Now his mind was fuelled by the fear of rejection.

That fear dimmed when your smile widened. “Really? That would be great! I’d love that.” You had said.

Spencers mind went to almost a million different places in that moment. He thought about curling up with you on his couch, the documentary playing on his tv as you focused intently on whatever information was being said, he would admire you, he would ache to pull you closer and kiss your smiling lips.

Then he remembered how kind you were. The memory was both a blessing and a curse because then he remembered that your acceptance was probably an acceptance from your kind heart and want to spend time with your friend, opposed to wanting to spend time with him.

You smiled at him sweetly again before you were rushing off to greet JJ and tell her about something silly or maybe talk about whatever the two of you did on the weekend. He knew you often went out with the girls of the team on weekends.

Those nights he would lay in bed and wonder what you were doing, what you were wearing, how your hair was done, if you were laughing at a strangers jokes — you probably were. He knew that because you laughed at everyone’s jokes.

if all the joy in the world was wrapped up into a bundle and forced upon a person — that person was you. Spencer didn’t know if he had ever seen you not smiling and honestly his heart ached for the day he would have to.

“Hey Spence?” His head turned instantly towards the sound of your voice, he looked around to see you on your tiptoes trying to reach a file from a top shelf. He couldn’t help but smile at the sight. You didn’t need to say anything else before he was standing and walking over towards you.

He reached up, fingertips skimming along the files, “Which one do you need?” He asked gently, his eyes dipping away from the files to meet yours as you returned flat on your feet, a grateful smile on your lips, staring up at him.

“Um” You paused, eyebrows furrowing before a laugh left your lips, “The.. second one- I think” You paused before nodding.

He smiled “You think?” reaching up to pull out the second file nonetheless. He heard you sigh dramatically — he didn’t need to look at you to know you were smiling still, probably pushing hair behind your ear.

“Yes, I think.” You stated. He pulled out the file, handing it to you. You took it gently, flicking through it for a moment, your eyes dancing along the words on the page before nodding.

You scrunched up your nose a little when you looked back up at him. “— I thought right! Thank you Spence. You’re amazing and great and awesome” You rambled, flooding him with praise. He felt his cheeks warm at your never ending compliments despite how often you gave them. You constantly reminded him how amazing you thought he was — when he was doing the most minimal things.

He wanted to take it as a sign that maybe you felt the same way he did but then you’d flood someone else with the same praise and that flame of hope would dwindle down just as fast as it came alight.

“You’re welcome” He settled on as his eyes lingered on yours for a moment, your cheeks were a warm shade of pink and he wondered if that had anything to do with him rather than the fact the room was just a little bit warmer than normal.

You grinned and turned away. He followed as you walked back towards the desks. He sat down at his desk, swivelling his chair to face your desk. “I was thinking — if you wanted, this weekend we could watch that documentary at mine, my dog gets a bit excited around new people but he could stay outside if it makes you more comfortable— Oh and theres a new take away shop near my house if you wanted to get dinner” You rambled about your plan’s absentmindedly as you looked over the case.

Spencer felt his heart pull for a number of reasons, one because he didn’t even know you had a dog. He couldn’t help but wonder if everyone else did and this was just a piece of information he had missed out on. Secondly, at the fact you were serious about watching the documentary with him. You actually wanted to.

He had partly assumed you had just agreed because you were kind and didn’t want to hurt his feelings, and it would just be plans you two never really followed through with. He should’ve known better — because it was you.

“You don’t have plans with the girls?” He asked, eyebrows pinched together because he could clearly remember this morning hearing you and Emily talk about where you guys would go this weekend.

You let out a gentle laugh, shaking your head. “Im making plans with you actually. I go out with them every weekend, I’m sure they will survive without me for one.” You smiled sweetly at him, and his heart felt like it was being clenched by someones tight hand.

He tried to hide the fact his cheeks had turned an ugly shade of pink, and that his eyes had blinked away from your captivating gaze for a moment. “That- Yeah- Yeah. That would, thats fine. Your dog is fine. We can get dinner.” He stammered out, because apparently your kindness took away his ability to think straight. Although he knew that already.

“Great!” You smiled. Suddenly Spencer hoped this week would go fast. He turned his gaze back to yours as a question weighed on his tongue, a wonder.

“What type of dog do you have?” He asked, his tone laced with curiosity as he watched you reorganise your desk. How you were smiling while doing something so mundane had his stomach filling with an ache of longing.

You raised your eyes back to his, a gasp of excitement leaving your lips at the opportunity to talk about your dog. “A golden retriever!!” You said, before going into a ramble about your dog.

He grinned as he listened to every word. He couldn’t help but think, a golden retriever. That was so fitting.

What Spencer wasn’t expecting at the end of the week, was a book sitting on his desk. The book wasn’t the surprising part. It was the pink sticky note and what it had written on it that sparked his curiosity.

‘I read this last week and I know romance novels aren’t usually your style but I thought of you. Its annotated. The key is on the back. Have the greatest night <3’

You had already left for the night after dropping everyone’s weekly small gift off around their desks and waving goodbye. Spencer knew you left a little earlier than anyone else to get the bus. You knew how to drive, you had a car. When he had asked you why you got the bus everyday you had told him you just enjoyed people watching.

He constantly worried about what may happen with the dangers of public transport and with how kind you were — well you would be an easy target. How could he tell you that he worried about you when you gave him the sweetest reasoning in the world? How could he tell you he worried without pouring his heart out to you.

Spencer went home that night and in bed he read the book you had gifted him — you were right, romance novels weren’t necessarily his favourite but it didn’t stop him from reading it with just as much interest because it was you that recommended it.

His eyes danced along the key on the back for your annotation. Pink was things you found sweet, green was moments you found interesting, yellow was things that moments that made you sad. — that one made Spencer’s lips pull into a tug because how dare anything make someone so sweet so sad?

But what really caught his interest was the blue. ‘things i want you to know’ It made him wonder what things in this book could possibly be something you wanted him to know.

When reading, he came across many colours and lines highlighted, most in pink and green, a few in yellow, but there was only one part highlighted in blue, it was lines in a conversation in the middle of a particularly mushy love confession between the two characters of the book.

‘You smile a lot.’ was highlighted in blue,

and then, “When you’re around, its hard not to’

Spencer didn’t know what it meant — thats not true. He knew what it meant, he knew what you were saying but he didn’t know what it meant about how you felt about him. His mind swirled with the possibility that you might feel something for him.

How it was possible that someone like you, could ever feel anything for someone like him had his mind in a frenzy.

That didn’t matter when Spencer finished the book and added it to the collection of items you had gifted him, he kept the sticky note and placed it back on the book. He looked over the collection — each gift partnered with the sticky note you had written when gifting them.

Spencer Reid loved you, and if he played any part in making you smile — That was enough for him.

[fl100r]

♡JEALOUS KING♡

Katsuki 𝖡𝖺𝗄𝗎𝗀𝗈𝗎 𝗑 Top! 𝗆𝖺𝗅𝖾 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋

WARNINGS: SMUT with plot, Bakugou teasing u, cream pie, male orgasm, blowjob, standing sex, public sex, degrading Bakugou.

-King Bakugou x Butler! reader.. world in a historical fantasy setting, being gay is a scandal might get killed if u gex say, so Bakugou want to suck M/N's cock but gets cock blocked. ages: Bakugou (25), M/N (27)

"I love you.."

"my apology dawg, the world kinda homophobic rn."

"so what? I'm gay for you."

"were gonna get cancelled no cap lil bro."

"Just put ur cock in my mouth bro."

︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ⭑︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ⭑︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ⭑︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭ ⭑︶꒷꒦︶ ๋࣭

You and Prince Bakugou have been childhood friends for as long as you can remember. His mother visits your orphanage often, donating funds to support your education. Bakugou noticed you immediately when you first met. You were the quietest person he had ever encountered, rarely showing any emotions, even to him. One day, during an event his mother was hosting, where orphans and other children from the kingdom competed in fun challenges, there was a two-person team competition. Without hesitation, Bakugou grabbed your arm. You had been standing by the food table, quietly enjoying your favorite snacks.

"Old hag! I want to team up with him!" Bakugou shouted, raising your hand as he held it up. "But I don’t want to join," you mumbled, confused.

"Too bad! You're joining anyway!" Bakugou glared at you, leaving no room for argument. He didn’t even know why he wanted to team up with you—he just felt some strange connection, like there was something about you that intrigued him. The competition turned out to be a boat race. Bakugou sat in front, his expression irritated as usual, while you were seated at the back. Your stomach grumbled, still craving more food. You absentmindedly grabbed the paddles on either side of you, glancing back toward the food table one last time. Before you could dwell on it, the horn blared, signaling the start of the race. Bakugou surged forward, paddling furiously, far outpacing you. It was clear he was practically carrying the team through the competition, while you struggled to keep up.

You ended up doing nothing during the race, leaving Bakugou to handle everything on his own. Naturally, he won, and he jumped up in excitement, shouting about how he was the best.

As you tried to head back to the food area, Bakugou grabbed the collar of your shirt, pulling you back to his side. He threw an arm around your neck, holding you in a loose headlock. "Ahaha! You're all just extras compared to me and my sidekick!" he boasted, grinning widely. Irritated, you sighed. "Erm... can you please let me go?" you asked, turning your head toward him. Bakugou looked down at you, only to freeze when he realized how close your face was to his. His cheeks flushed slightly as he stared at you.

You managed to slip away from Bakugou’s hold, leaving him behind in the boat, still a bit flustered. Without saying a word, you casually walked over to the food table, grabbing a plate and piling it with your favorite snacks. As Bakugou stood there, frozen and flushed, still processing the moment, you made your way back to the orphanage, seemingly unfazed by the entire ordeal.

✦───── ❝ Years Later ❞ ─────✦

"Your Majesty, please wake up. You still have paperwork from last night," you said as you opened the curtains, letting the morning sunlight flood into Bakugou's room.

"Son of a bitch..." Bakugou grumbled, turning away from the sunlight and refusing to face the open curtains. The insult was clearly aimed at you. "I don’t have a mother, so I wouldn’t know if she is a bitch or not, sir," you replied calmly. "Anyway, sir, please get up." Before you could finish, Bakugou reached out and grabbed your collar, still lying down as he pulled you closer. "Listen here, you tea towel tyrant! I don’t care about the paperwork from last night—it’s already irritating me! Now leave me alone before I have your head chopped off!" Bakugou growled, his face now uncomfortably close to yours. You wrinkled your nose and muttered, "Ugh… sir, your morning breath… I’m sorry." Bakugou’s face flushed in embarrassment, and he swung a punch in frustration. You quickly backed away, dodging just in time.

"Sorry, sir, for stating a simple fact, but you really do need to get ready," you said. "I’ll start your bath." You walked into his bathroom, turning on the golden faucet and letting the tub fill with water. While the tub filled, you went into his bedroom and sorted through his closet, picking out clothes for him. After selecting his outfit, Bakugou entered the bathroom, closing the door behind him. "I'll prepare breakfast, sir!" you called out as you made your way down the gorgeous hallway. Statues of Bakugou’s ancestors lined the walls, and you passed by them on your way to the kitchen.

As you chatted with the chef, who was busy preparing Bakugou’s excellent breakfast, you busied yourself in the kitchen, making tea for him. Once the meal was ready, you carried it to the long dining table where Bakugou had already seated himself in the far chair. You placed his meal in front of him and poured a cup of tea, setting it down beside his plate.

You motioned to the other servants to assist Bakugou while you began to walk away. However, as you started to leave, Bakugou tugged on the black suit you were wearing from behind his chair, where he was eating his breakfast. "No, you stay here," he said firmly. You tried to protest, but Bakugou was insistent. As you waited for Bakugou to finish his breakfast, you motioned to the other servants to take over your chores. You knew that since you became his butler, Bakugou didn’t want you to leave his side, so you had to find ways to manage your tasks while remaining close to him.

One of the butlers handed you a stack of envelopes, which you took and began to read aloud for Bakugou while he continued eating his breakfast. "Sir, there’s an invitation from the Todoroki royal family. They’re hosting a celebration ball for the crowning of Shoto Todoroki, the youngest sibling of the Todoroki family. You should consider going—" Bakugou cut you off, his eyebrows furrowing as he sipped his tea. "No. I’m not going to some stupid coronation."

You tried to convince him, but Bakugou wouldn’t budge. His temper was well-known, and despite your efforts, he remained adamant. You knew that aligning with the Todoroki family or showing them some respect could be beneficial, especially given his many enemies. Ever since his parents had died a few years ago, Bakugou’s demeanor had only worsened, making him even more difficult to manage.

You rubbed your temples in frustration. "Maybe… sigh, I could come with you, sir. The ball is tonight. I can clear my schedule if that’s fine with you—"Bakugou cut you off but, of course, he agreed. He then went about his daily routine, snapping his fingers to motion you to follow him. You sighed, following him like an irritated dog.

One of Bakugou's routines was horse racing in the woods near his castle. As he mounted his usual horse, you sat at a nearby table, lost in your thoughts while watching him. Suddenly, Bakugou’s voice cut through your reverie. "Hey, peasant! Come over here!" Bakugou yelled, summoning you to join him. As you approached, he handed you some gear that looked like it was meant for horseback riding. "Sir, I can’t ride a horse," you said, holding up the gear. Bakugou climbed onto his horse and replied, "You’re riding with me. Put on the gear and get back behind me." He looked at you with his usual furrowed eyebrows, always seeming annoyed.

You sighed again and put on the gear. As you tried to climb onto the horse, you managed to successfully get on and position yourself behind Bakugou. However, just as you settled in, Bakugou grabbed your shirt and pulled you closer to him, forcing you into close contact with him.

You tried to get comfortable, but before you could, Bakugou kicked the horse into motion. The sudden movement shocked you, and you instinctively looked for something to hold onto—anything other than Bakugou. But as you started to slip, you had no choice.

You quickly wrapped one arm around Bakugou’s waist, your face pressed against his left shoulder. Glancing to Bakugou, you noticed him smirking, as if he knew this was going to happen all along. You glanced around and realized just how deep into the forest you were. The horse started to slow down, eventually coming to a stop. You tried to remove your arm from around Bakugou’s waist, but before you could, he grabbed it, pulling you closer as he leaned back into you. His head was now resting against your chest, making the situation even more awkward at least for you.

You both sat there in silence, Bakugou cuddling against your chest while you looked around, trying to avoid the awkwardness. Bakugou kept squirming, shifting around until he reached for your other arm, wrapping it around himself, pulling you even closer.

For you, it was an incredibly awkward position, but Bakugou seemed unfazed. You kept your gaze fixed on the forest, not wanting to face him. As you noticed the sky deepening into a rich orange, you remembered the ball. "Oh, right, we must get ready for the ba—" you started to say, but before you could finish, you felt something rubbing against your crotch. Your face flushed in embarrassment as you realized it was Bakugou, his body the closest to you. He was rubbing his backside against you, seemingly unaware—or perhaps he just didn’t care. He didn’t say a word, continuing his subtle movements.

"Sir, ugh... stop, you know this is forbidden... ergh," you panted, trying to keep your composure. Bakugou didn’t miss a beat. "What’s forbidden? I’m just sitting, M/N," he said with a smug tone, clearly enjoying the situation. You gritted your teeth. This royal bastard—he knew exactly what he was doing, As you tried to keep your composure, Bakugou reached his hand onto your crotch, rubbing even harder.

You panted softly, trying to regain your breath when you heard a distant voice.

"Your Majesty! Where are you? You need to get ready for the ball!" one of the maids called out, her voice echoing through the forest.

Bakugou immediately stopped and, with a quick motion, urged his horse to head back toward the castle. Once you reached the stables, Bakugou dismounted with ease.

"Get M/N ready too. He’s coming with me," Bakugou commanded, still smirking as he walked off.

"Sir, M/N, can you get off the horse?" the maid asked hesitantly.

You cut her off, "Go inside. I’ll go in when I’m ready," you said, still sitting on the horse. This bastard got you hard. Embarrassed, you hesitated to get off, not wanting the maids or other servants to notice your situation—especially since they loved to gossip.

He’s going to get you killed someday.

✦───── ❝At The Ball ❞ ─────✦

“Presenting the new king of the Frostflame Empire! Shoto Todoroki!”

The ball was in full swing, with everyone dancing and chatting. Bakugou was mingling with his friends, while you stood in the corner with the other servants.

“M/N!” a familiar voice called out. It was Midoriya.

“Hello, Sir Midoriya—” you began, but Midoriya cut you off with a nervous laugh. “Oh, come on... you don’t need to call me that, ahah.”

Even though you and Midoriya had been childhood friends and remained close, his status as a hero made you feel compelled to address him formally. To this day, you still considered him a friend.

“Midoriya, how’ve you been lately?” you asked.

Izuku was momentarily surprised by the change of subject but quickly responded with enthusiasm. “Great! I recently got engaged to Uraraka!”

As you continued talking, you found yourself smiling at one of Izuku’s funny jokes. You missed your friends from the orphanage and felt a pinch of nostalgia. However, you couldn't shake the feeling that someone was watching you intensely. You tried to brush it off, but before you could think much of it.

Bakugou suddenly stepped between you and Midoriya. “What the hell are you doing, Deku!” he shouted.

Izuku looked surprised. “W-What?? I was just talking to—”

Bakugou cut him off, continuing to argue and insult the nervous hero despite Midoriya’s attempts to defuse the situation.

Seeing the commotion, you quickly intervened, pulling Bakugou away from the scene and guiding him into a large, empty hallway. “Sir! What are you doing?! You know people are going to gossip about this—especially talking like that to everyone’s favorite hero! Have you lost your mind?!” you yelled at him quietly, trying to keep the confrontation discreet.

"I've been trying to keep your image from getting destroyed! You seriously can't just calm down for one second, sir? Fucking hell..." you said, frustration evident as you covered your face with both palms. You didn't notice Bakugou had already dropped to his knees and was trying to get your belt off. "Sir, what the fuck are you doing now?" you demanded, bewildered by his sudden action. "What does it look like, dumbass?" Bakugou retorted, successfully removing your belt and now zipping down your zipper. pulling out your cock out, started to lick it up and down. You panted in frustration, at the same time feeling aroused.

As you looked around your surroundings, trying to see if anyone was watching this scene, you turned around until— Bakugou took your cock fully into his mouth, him gagging on it. This made you even more frustrated. "You fucking bastard—" you said, grabbing Bakugou’s blonde hair and pulling him closer to your cock, God his mouth is warm. You thought as he sucked your cock faster, holding your hips as you put your hand onto a wall to support you as Bakugou went faster.

"Augh.. goddamn it, you're gonna get me killed.." you said to him as he sucks your cock faster, basically begging you to cum inside his mouth. "Augh!- Fuck.." as you climax filling Bakugou's mouth with your semen. You panted, sweat already beading on your forehead.

As you look at Bakugou, he has your semen on his cheeks as he tries to get all of it into his mouth don't wanting it to be wasted, "Get up…" you said to Bakugou. He stood up, but before he could say anything, you grabbed his neck and pinned him to the wall beside you, pressing your lips against his. He struggled a bit, but eventually, he calmed down, his hands resting on your shoulders. You pulled away, panting. "Pant… Is this what you want..?" you asked, before kissing him again, but this time more roughly.

You pulled away again, your face now against the side of his neck. You kissed and bit it as you spoke, "I've been trying to survive and not get killed because of your reckless actions, rubbing against me, grabbing my cock without my permission, even sneaking into my room at night just to relieve yourself."

Bakugou’s face blushed the moment you said that last part, clearly embarrassed. He looked away from your eyes, but you grabbed his face, making him look at you. With his eyes watering, he gazed at you. “You seriously frustrate me Sir.." you began to unbuckle his pants, still pinning him onto the wall. as Bakugou's pants dropped on the marbled floor, You turned him around, so now his back was facing you. you put your tip onto his hole, rubbing on it, teasing him as he whimper. "you son of bitch.. please.. eurgh.."You grabbed his neck, pulling his arched back against you. "Come on, sir, that’s not my name. You know it…" rubbing you cock onto Bakugou's hole, teasing him even more as your tip closer to get inside him, "Argh... P-Please M/N.. Sir, please just..- Agh!-" you put your cock inside him. you didn't let him take adjust of your size as you quickly slamming your hips into him. "Argh! Argh! Haah.. M/N-" you covered his mouth with your hand, mumbling him.

“Shut the fuck up, would ya?.. I don’t want both of us to get beheaded because of your moaning, F-Fuck.." As you rested your head on his left shoulder, you look down to his harden cock seeing already white liquid out of his cock. "Did you already fucking cum?.. Goddamn, are you really That pent up? Eheh.. S-Shit.. I'm close.." you grabbed Bakugou's cock, started stroking it fast. You looked at Bakugou’s face, his eyes rolling back and drool already dripping onto your hand. "Disgusting.. you should really see yourself right now.. Sir.." You slightly giggled, "Insulting Midoriya, Argh.. Making a scene, Damaging your already broken Image, for just my cock.." you felt wet in your hand, it's Bakugou's semen, he came again. "Cumming again sir.. F-Fuck.. Get ready for my mine then.." As you pin Bakugou onto the wall harder, you slamming your hips again and again onto him. you feel your climax close, "Argh!...Stand still.. ergh.. G-Goddamn it you're shaking.." you slammed your hips onto Bakugou releasing your semen into him.

Both of you were panting and sweating as you zipped your pants up cleaning yourself up. “Shit… we gotta go, sir, Before someone finds you like this.." You grabbed Bakugou's pants from the floor and put them on him, Bakugou went limp against your chest. “Sir, come on, wake up from your fantasies. We’ve got to go.” He tried to walk but failed, falling into your arms. You sighed. “We’re not doing this again. Ever." you said, "Hey! Not my fault you went rough on me! you Tea Towel Tyrant.. Tch." You grabbed Bakugou and carried him as if he were a damsel in distress. You headed in the direction outside, making your way to the carriage driver. You avoided the ball entrance, where many people were gathered, and took the long way instead.

Don't want any one to know that you just Slammed your hips and Came into your King, "Tch.." you rolled your eyes, avoiding eye contact with Bakugou, just focus on going Home instead.

✦───── ❝In the Carriage ❞ ─────✦

You closed the door behind you and sat beside Bakugou. "Urgh your semen is dripping out of me.." Bakugou said, Looking out the window of the carriage, you were lost in thought. You had just done something so sinful and unforgivable that you were sure you’d be killed if anyone found out about the scene you and your king had just made in that hallway, You kept thinking about it over and over. until Bakugou Touching your clothed cock. You sighed. "Seriously..?" you said, looking at him with disappointment. He avoided eye contact with you, instead staring out the other side of the window where he was sitting.

you rubbed your temples, but didn't move his hand away instead let him be. you get closer to him, and whispered "if you keep doing that, I might just fuck you in front of a mirror." You knew your king very well. You knew he hated seeing his vulnerable self in the mirror. But that didn’t stop him. Instead, he brought himself closer to you, essentially cuddling you.

You sighed, the threat failed at your favor. "What am I gonna do with you Sir.."

✦𓆩♡𓆪Thank you for Reading! 𓆩♡𓆪✦

[factual-fantasy]

27 Asks! Thank you! :}} ✏️

@unpopularartist14

I don't ever number my panels or strive for a specific number- the only limitation I keep in mind is keeping the comic under 30 canvases. But that's only because of Tumblr's stupid new image limit. Before that crapdate I would make a comic with as many canvases/panels as I wanted.

And idk what you mean by overwhelming- I put between 1-6 drawings on one canvas, it just depends on the comic and what i need from that scene :0

Also idk what a comic chapter is- and I don't believe myself to be the best with dialogue 😅 I just slap comics together and keep adjusting it until it feels right..

Sorry, I'm sure these were not helpful answers. I never claimed to be good at explaining how I do things. Plus I'm in a pretty bad headspace so I'm sure that's not helping me..😓

I'm self taught, so its hard to explain how I learned anything or to teach it to others- "I just.. do it." "I just change it until it feels right." "I just draw it. How?.. idk I just.. draw it..?"

I hope you can find another artist to help you. Unless the questions get very specific- I'm afraid I can offer no better answers. <:(

@ayliminum

Ngl, I have no idea when I'm gonna open it again. My server has gotten enough members that if it gets any bigger, I'm gonna need a mod to help me monitor it. But I don't have anyone I trust/feel comfortable enough/know well enough- to add as a mod. And considering how horrible my mental and physical health has been.. I haven't wanted to even deal with it anyways.

Right now my server is manageable at its size. So I just closed it off to new members and put "get a server mod/reopen the server" on the list of millions of things I need to do once I crawl out of this health deteriorating pit.💀

AWWWW!!! WORGI!! COLF!!💞💞

@h31fd3ad

No way XDDD

@cicutagreninja

For Bonnie, he is an animatronic designed to handle small groups at a time and have 1 on 1 interactions. But in the case where Freddy is decommissioned, he takes Freddy's place as the star. So he constantly has huge crowds swarming all around him..

As a result, Bonnie is basically constantly overwhelmed. And any second that he has to himself, he just goes completely stone faced and quiet. Kind of to mentally take a break and recharge from all the interactions..

As for Foxy, he always looks so solemn in that AU because his heart just aches for his friends.. He misses Chica and Freddy.. He can see how horrible Bonnie, Roxy and Monty are feeling.. he wishes he could help them all.. but there's nothing he can do...

@neo-metalscottic

AAAAAA Thank you! :DDD I wonder how long it'll take me to get to 30K.. 🤔

Also as for terraria- I haven't fought any of the bosses on my own and I'm sure I haven't seen all the biomes 💀 But so far I like the jungle biome and the wall of flesh is a cool concept :00

I'm glad to hear you've liked my Octonauts stuff! :)) As for what attacked Calico Jack, it was supposed to be a sea monster that could be mistaken for a gator :0

I also had no back story in mind for how he got the scar on his eye <:0 and idk if he'd be willing to share the story.. it depends on how he got it! <:/

Aww.. poor Emmet.. man. I am not looking forward to experiencing that myself.

@holly-opal

I've seen the movie trailer for it! Beyond that I know nothing about it <:0

@sussyhahag

Its more of a reverse egg yolk, but I see what you mean! XDD

@captain-skyler1987

My week has been rough.😔funny picture though XD

(Referencing this post)

WAHGG THANK YOU!! :DDD

Also thankfully no- if Wally ever got close to being that tired he'd sit down somewhere. Maybe even accidentally take a nap-

@pink088

Idk if its supposed to hurt after the initial piercing- make sure you're taking care of the holes! <:0

(Referencing this post)

AAAA YES ITS EXCITING AND A LITTLE STRESSFUL! XDD

@ask-observer-ron

@cat7890

I haven't been feeling well, my health it pretty bad.. but thank you! I'm glad to hear you like my artwork! :)))

@beryl-shade

I haven't seen it, is it good? :0 Perhaps I should watch 8-Bitryans video on it..🤔

@birodactyloftheblog

WAAHHGHGH THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! :DDD

Maybe someday! :00

@enbydemirainbowbigfoot

No need to apologize! I take it as a big compliment! Thank you! :)))

@wolfie-777

Aw! Cute wolf! :)

Ugh.. that's always such a shame to hear.. but hey thanks for telling me 👍

@antikittysocial

Aw,, that's so sad.. <:( poor Shellington..

@briandraws

My head is more of a liquid. If you took a hair dryer to it I'd go splat XDD

I imagine the mama Emboar got pregnant and then the father dipped. Just like real boar fathers do 💀

I've never heard of it.. is that a show about the Daycare attendant..? :0

I do not know what that is.. sorry! <:(

(Referencing this post)

<XD It was certainly a show. I should go back and watch the whole thing in order sometime-

[tangledinink]

Well! It's not a Monday, and it's been a hot second. BUT!!! :3c Here! Chapter 27 of I'm Sorry, Teenage Mutant What Now? is here! Raph and Casey finally get to have some long overdue bonding time together. Read it on ao3 or below the cut.

[ prev ]

“Why the hell is she ALWAYS HERE?!” Donnie cried in complaint, just barely twisting out of the path of a kunai’s bite, twisting backwards to retreat from his opponent’s assault.

“Great question. Honestly, it seems like you’re kind of obsessed with us. Sort of embarrassing,” Leo chirped in reply, grinning big as he spun into the fray, leaping in defense of his twin. The Foot Ninja easily dodged him and the sweep of his odachi, all but spitting at him in reply.

“DIE.”

“Damn, okay. Touchy,” Leo muttered.

Their opponent shrieked in response, throwing herself at her enemy, but was easily rebuffed by their father, jerking forward to shove her away from his children. Raph would admit she was an impressive fighter, but she was certainly no match for their dad. It took almost no time at all for him to pin her down to the ground, and Raph was just beginning to get a sense of deja vu when Leo heaved a great sigh.

“At least there’s only one of--”

“WHY? WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT?!” Donnie squawked, whipping around to absolutely glare at their twin. 

And god, you would not imagine what happened just a few seconds later.

Raph managed to punch out two Foot Clan ninjas and throw another through a storefront before he came about five centimeters from being knifed, and he was finally forced to seek temporary refuge, ducking behind the cover of a nearby sunglasses kiosk to catch his breath and attempt to get his shit together.

C’mon, Raph, focus. You got this. Everyone’s counting on you. You just gotta keep it together, and figure out where the Dark Armor piece is so we can grab it and get out without anyone getting--

“Raph!” 

His younger brother’s excited, breathless cry severed his frantic train of thoughts, and his head bobbed upward just in time to watch Leo rush over to join him-- nearly skidding out in his rush. “I think I have a plan--”

Raph froze.

He swore he felt his entire body seize for just a second, his heart clenching up tight in his chest as though someone had just reached through him and grabbed it with ice cold hands.

“No,” he snapped in reply.

“What?!” Leo protested. “You didn’t even let me expl—“

“NO,” Raph hissed, harder this time. He didn’t let himself look back over at Leo, because he knew that he would just glare at him. And he knew that it would just make his body freeze up even more.

“Raph, I promise this will work, it’s—“

“Leo, STOP. I said no! What part of that don’t you get!?” Raph snarled and there was this horrendous tickling crawl running up and down his spine like there was a damn millipede under his skin, and he didn’t want to fight with Leo, so he just—

Ran.

He had to get back out into the fray sooner or later, anyway. They couldn’t just hide forever.

He didn’t wanna be angry at Leo. He didn’t wanna take things out on him. It wasn’t… his fault. Exactly. Totally? Maybe? And he didn’t wanna think about who’s fault it was, anyway, so this was easier.

He didn’t have to think about whether or not he was angry at Leo if he was taking it out on someone else.

And luckily, they were literally surrounded by evil ninjas right now. So. That was actually pretty convenient.

And yeah, okay, sure, there were a lot of them. But here’s the thing-- Raph was no scientist, but he had crunched the numbers, and he was pretty sure their dad was badass enough to count as at least two dozen ninjas, which meant their odds were actually pretty good. 

And if their dad was at least two dozen, Raph couldn’t just sit back and let himself be just one.

There were a lot of Foot Clan soldiers, yes. But they had shown up here for a reason, and it was important. And this time, they weren’t just gonna retreat. Raph knew what was at stake-- they were gonna get what they came for.

(That’s what he had told himself at the time, anyway. That was the mantra in his head the entire time-- roaring through the fray alongside his family.)

Raph had been to this mall before. In fact, he’d been to this mall lots of times before. It was overall unremarkable, but the one thing that had always stood out to Raph was the elevator. And this was because Raph had always HATED it.

He didn’t want to say afraid, per se, because that would involve him openly admitting that he was afraid of the elevator. But really, could you blame him? It wasn’t that elevators in general frightened him, it was that THIS elevator frightened him. He remembered visiting this mall back when he was small with the rest of his family and begging his Dad to let them take the escalators instead.

Because how in the world could a glass elevator possibly be safe?! And who the heck would even enjoy that!? Let alone think it was a good idea to build one?!

His first thought he had upon his body careening through the glass, shattering on impact, having been sent flying after a particularly large, brutish member of the Foot slammed into his side, was “see? I was right. This was a bad idea.”

It was pretty much the only thought he had, actually, his brain a bit too caught up in the fact that they had just been thrown through an elevator shaft to really process anything else right away.

Thank god the rest of his body didn’t need his brain in order to react.

He didn’t need conscious thought to tell him to grab onto the remaining metal edge of the elevator, clinging to the closest thing he had to solid ground with his arm as the rest of his body dangled over open air.

(What floor were they on again? The third? The fifth?)

He also didn’t need conscious thought to tell him to grab onto the girl that had been thrown with him— the girl he had been locked into combat with about ten seconds ago.

With his free arm, he bundled her up as close as he possibly could to himself, and he hung on tight.

And for half of a second, they kind of just… hung there. Raph’s feet scrabbled against the smooth surface of the panel of glass below them, surrounded on all sides by thick glass and metal save for the hole just above them that Raph was now hanging onto for dear life.

He could feel little pieces of shattered glass falling down the back of his shirt and tickling at his skin.

He was vaguely aware of screaming from up above him, and while he could pick out his family’s voices amongst that of strangers, he couldn’t quite tell what they were saying. It was hard to hear anything over the heartbeat in his ears.

He glanced down at the girl shoved up against his side. For every bit he was hanging onto her, she was hanging onto him just as desperately, fistfuls of his clothing clenched up in her fingers.

Her eyes were so big.

“Hang on,” he heard himself saying, kind of distantly in the background. “Just hang on. I’ll get us back up.”

And almost as soon as he spoke, her eyes narrowed again.

About four things happened in very quick succession over the following five seconds.

The first was the girl hoisting herself upwards by her grip on him, twisting around with shaking fingers so she could draw a knife from her belt and lunge towards the arm that was not currently wrapped around her.

The second was a flash of crimson light overhead, tickling around the edges of the elevator car that currently sat about three stories above them.

The third thing was a horrific, shrieking groan of metal, followed by a sickening snap.

And the fourth was Raph letting go of his hold on the elevator shaft.

---

Casey was honestly a bit surprised to find that she had, in fact, not been killed in the ensuing fall.

She didn’t think she was even… hurt. At least not badly.

Now that the world had stopped spinning, she began to take quiet inventory, a soft groan escaping her as she strained to gather her bearings again. When she moved, shards of shattered glass fell off of her like snow, joining the mounds of it underfoot with little clicks and clatters. Upon moving, she also realized that there was still an arm wrapped around her, pressed up so tight around her middle that it was nearly hard to breathe. But it wasn’t quite painful.

She had just fallen about four stories. And yet, she was pretty sure she wasn’t even seriously injured. No broken bones, at least. Everything could still move. She could feel her arms, her legs, her toes. She could still feel all her fingers.

She had heard her clan members yelling before. Heard the command to cut the cable. If the fall didn’t kill her, then being crushed by a falling elevator car really should have. It should have killed them both. It was supposed to kill them both.

But it didn’t. They were both alive.

Because the person she had been attempting to murder, who still had an arm wrapped around her middle, hunched over her as if to shield her, currently had them both shoved into the very corner of the elevator shaft, shoved up against the concrete walls of the lower level they now resided in.

They hadn’t been crushed because he was holding up the elevator car that should have killed them, his arms encrusted in shimmering, crystalline red light.

He was also definitely not a human anymore.

“Are you okay?” He bit out, his voice tight and strained but still soft and wobbling with concern, and Casey gaped rather than answering. He shifted slightly, readjusting his stance. His upper body was braced up against one corner of the metal panel that made up the bottom of the elevator car— creating just enough of a pocket for the two of them to take refuge in, tented beneath the wreckage up above. His long, alligator-like tail shifted as he moved, sweeping through the broken glass.

Shhhh shhhhh.

“Oh my god,” Casey responded, her eyes wide. “… You’re actually a mutant turtle.”

“What?” He bit out, his eyes just barely flickering over to her, and Casey quickly bit her tongue.

“Nothing,” she spat, bristling slightly. Jesus christ, why was she talking to him? What the hell was she even doing…?

Come on, Recruit, get it together. Focus. You’re not dead. You didn’t die. So you still have a job to do.

Though her hands were shaking horribly, she lurched a bit to grab for her belt, only to realize with a dawning horror that her kunai were no longer there. I must have lost them in the fall… She bristled for a moment, wriggling from the other’s grip just enough so that she could back away— pressing herself up against the cold concrete wall. The space they had was incredibly limited, however, and the distance she could put between them was… minimal, to say the least.

She could feel her heart beating in her chest as she patted herself down again, and then a third time, not daring to take her eyes off the enemy but at the same time searching frantically. 

She was unarmed.

And he was… a giant mutant reptile.

(And, look, she hadn’t exactly thought that Draxum was… lying, per se, but oh my lord. Seriously?)

She didn’t take her eyes off of him. And he didn’t take his eyes off of her.

“Hey, uh,” he shifted slightly beneath the weight of the elevator, wincing a bit at the press. Shattered glass shivered softly beneath him as his feet moved. “Can you, uh, not stab Raph, please…? ‘Cause that’s gonna make holding this thing up… a lot harder…”

… Ah. She supposed he had a point.

A little voice in her head said that that didn’t matter. The benefit of eliminating a member of the Hamato Clan weighed far heavier than the loss of her life would to the well-being of the Clan. Killing him, and, in turn, herself would still measure out to be a win at the end of it all.

She should kill him.

And herself.

… But she… didn’t have her kunai anyway, right? So… 

Perhaps she… wouldn’t.

She was still waiting to see if her heart rate was going to slow down any time soon, finding herself a bit annoyed with how rapidly it was still banging away in her ears, the skin there throbbing as blood raced through her veins. She kept sucking in long, steadying, calming breaths, trying to push it down, but the adrenaline had not yet run its course, it seemed. 

“I… Will not stab you,” she finally said, narrowing her eyes suspiciously, her body still tight and tense, muscles coiled. “IF… you do not make any attempts to harm me.”

She had no weapons, but he was one. Even if he was holding up a fucking elevator right now.

“Wasn’t planning on it,” he wheezed, his voice caught somewhere between a shaking grunt and a laugh, and she scowled. “You’re not hurt—?” He prodded once more.

“Don’t ask me that,” she snapped, bristling in response and clenching her jaw. She didn’t understand what benefit he thought he would reap by pretending to be concerned. She wasn’t that stupid.

And if he actually was concerned, and it wasn’t an act, then it simply meant that he was the stupid one, and nothing else.

“Alright, okay…!” He bit out, once again adjusting his grip slightly, rolling one shoulder forward slightly to shift the weight he was carrying from one side over the other. “… It’ll be alright. My family is… gonna come get us. Any second…”

“You don’t know that,” she scoffed.

“They will,” he insisted, though now his eyes shifted away— staring hollow at the corner of the little pocket they were now trapped inside of. Casey could just barely pick out the movement of his lips and tongue, ghosting some sort of whisper to himself in between his heaves of breath. Seven, eight, nine, ten…

Counting. He was counting to himself. From one to ten, and then again, and again.

“You’re hurt,” Casey said— not really asking, but rather stating. 

“’S just heavy,” he deflected. “… ‘M fine. Raph’s sturdy.” 

Raph. Right… Short for Raphael. She knew their names. Of course she did, she just… hadn’t known their nicknames until now.

Or rather, hadn’t thought of them. What would she ever care what they called each other? What they answered to?... 

… But she supposed she couldn’t actually disagree.

He was sturdy before, when he was a human.

She wasn’t sure she could find the words to describe how absolutely immovable he appeared to her now. It was equal parts impressive and absolutely infuriating. 

God. She hated to fucking look at him. Especially now, like this. 

It somehow felt like a goddamn threat. He was holding an elevator up over her head, hunched over to provide a shelter for her body, and it felt like he was fucking threatening her. 

Well, it wouldn’t work.

“I’m not afraid of you, mutant,” she snapped, her lips curling back over her teeth.

“… Alright?” He said, sounding a bit confused, and Casey bristled in offense at the audacity he had to be baffled by her completely rational statement. 

“I could still kill you,” she said.

For a long moment, it was quiet. Aside from her heartbeat. And his ragged breathing.

“… I’m not tryin’ to scare you,” he said. “… Sorry.”

There was another long moment of silence.

“What’s your name?” He asked. Casey stiffened slightly.

“I don’t have a name,” she hissed, narrowing her eyes, and then absolutely snarled when he bit out a bark of laughter in response.

“What do you mean you don’t have a name?” He wheezed. “You… You don’t gotta tell me if you don’t want…!”

“I don’t have a name,” she pressed, harder this time, narrowing her eyes— hesitating for just a second. 

“… The Foot Clan doesn’t have names. We renounce them,” she said after a moment. “…. We only take titles. They reflect our rank and our power. Names make you weaker.”

She didn’t know why she was telling him this. It was stupid. He didn’t deserve to know. Because she was angry that he would look down on her for it…? 

Because she was still mostly convinced that they would both die down here?

“… That’s sad,” he said.

“It’s not,” she said.

“It is,” he said. “… I think it’s sad. You deserve to have a name.”

“I don’t want a name.”

“What’s your title, then?”

“… Recruit.”

“Alright, then, Recruit,” he bit out, a tiny bit of a laugh still coloring his voice. “… I’m Raph. And my family is gonna get us out of here. I promise.”

“You shouldn’t make promises you can’t keep,” she growled in response, narrowing her eyes.

“I don’t,” he assured.

And then, for a while, it was quiet again. 

“Are you actually eighteen?” He said, and Casey scoffed.

“YES!” She yelped in response. “What, you don’t think I am!? I am clearly eighteen! I am very obviously an ADULT!!!”

“No,” he admitted, grinning just the tiniest bit. “Not really.”

“You’re an idiot,” she accused.

“Yeah, people say that sometimes…” He mumbled with a huff. He shifted again, readjusting his grip ever-so-slightly and twisting his feet, and the metal groaned ominously above them. 

Just for a second, his footing slipped, and he jerked— and for just a single moment, the top of the world was falling again, and they were both about to be crushed.

His foot hit the side of the wall, and he braced, tensing all his muscles properly once more and holding steady.

Nothing fell.

The creaking up above quieted.

“… Ow,” he muttered, quietly, to himself, shakily, jerkily moving his foot again after several long seconds of both of them not daring to move or breathe— cautiously inching it away from the wall. A smudge of blood was left behind, Casey noted.

Her heartbeat had never slowed, and she was beginning to think that it never would.

“… You’re standing wrong,” she said.

“… What?” Raph bit out, glancing over at her after a long beat of silence.

“YOUR STANCE IS WRONG,” she spat, scowling slightly and fixing him with a hard glare. This is why she had to yell— no one ever wanted to fucking listen to her when she said things, and the things she said were important. “You’re going to hurt yourself or fall like that, you’re doing everything STUPID. Move your leg this way, and twist this leg out. And bend your knee, and… and move your arm over this way a little if you can. And it’ll spread out the weight better.”

At first, Casey didn’t think he was actually going to listen to her.

And then, very, very slowly, moving at a crawl, he shifted his body— following her instructions and making the corrections until he settled into place again. He was still shaking, and still panting, but just… the tiniest bit less now.

“… This is better,” he finally said.

“Of course it is,” she huffed, shifting just enough to shoot him a glare. “God. Doesn’t the Hamato Clan teach you anything?”

“Kinda,” he laughed. “… Is this what the Foot Clan teaches you? Seems… kinda… kinda niche…”

“The Foot Clan teaches me everything,” she hissed.

“Are they, like, your family?”

And Casey hesitated. Because she wasn’t sure how to answer that.

Yes, her brain said.

No, it said immediately after.

“… They are now,” she finally settled on, squaring her shoulders slightly. “Stop asking me questions.”

“Why?”

“You’re my enemy. I’m not giving you any information.”

“We ain’t got nothin’ better to do.”

“I don’t care.”

“You can ask me questions if you want,” he said. “Raph don’t mind.”

She scowled, and he shot her a weak, shaking, almost pleading sorta grin.

“C’mon,” he bade. “… ’S easier if I got somethin’ to think about.”

She narrowed her eyes, and her frown deepened.

This is to your advantage. You can get information from the enemy, right? This is good. Come on. Focus. Stop getting distracted.

“… Are you cold-blooded?”

“… What?”

“Stop making me repeat myself. ARE. YOU. COLD. BLOODED.”

“I don’t think so?” He said with a soft snort. “… I mean. Maybe? I’m not sure.”

“How do you not know?” Casey hissed.

“Well, I don’t… I don’t usually spend a lot of time in, uh… this body…!” He bit out. 

“You’re stupid.”

“Quit sayin’ that.”

“No.”

He laughed a tiny bit, shaking his head ever-so-slightly. “Why do you wanna know?”

Casey frowned. Why did she want to know?...

“… I’m just curious.”

“How old are you?” Raph asked.

“I’m eighteen. And I told you not to ask me questions.”

“You’re not eighteen.”

“I AM!!! I AM EIGHTEEN!”

“Nah! There’s no way you’re older than me!” He laughed. “You look like you’re in high school or somethin’.”

“I don’t go to school,” she growled, curling her lips with distaste. “And I am eighteen.”

“Why not?”

“I already told you,” she hissed. “I learn everything I need from my clan. Stop asking me questions.”

“Do you do, like… like, homeschooling?”

“I train.”

“You dropped out of high school?”

“I never went to high school, so I did not drop out, so there!” She huffed, crossing her arms over her chest. “NOW STOP ASKING ME QUESTIONS. I will not answer them! You are trying to get me to reveal secrets of my clan and it WILL NOT WORK.”

“I’m not! I’m not, I swear!” He insisted. “… Man, you should go to school. I feel like you’d be good at sports--”

A distant clamber of footsteps and a horrid, wrenching cry disrupted their strained conversation.

“RAPH!”

“Dad!” Casey’s companion immediately answered in kind, his head jerking slightly towards the noise. He had sounded so eerily calm up until now. “WE’RE HERE! W-we’re okay--!”

“Oh my god they’re alive--!”

“Raph--!”

“We’re coming, holy shit, it’s okay--”

“We’re gonna get you outta there, big guy, no problem, just hang on for us--!”

Everything moved really fast after that. Casey was sure they were saying other things, all speaking over each other and crying, clambering over each other and clustered about at the very edge of the elevator to peer down at them-- reassuring him, over and over and over,

‘It’ll be okay, we’ll get you out, we’ll save you, you’re okay, we’re here now, you’ll be okay.’

For some reason, everything else was kind of far off and muddy, but those things she could still hear. They sort of echoed, bounced around in her head.

And then a hand was thrust out in front of her.

She jerked back.

“Grab my hand,” the oldest of the group pressed, and it took her a second to hear him properly, but she could if she focused. “I’ll pull you out.” 

Casey bristled, pulling back slightly.

He was the only one not wearing the Hamato symbol-- but she knew he was one. 

“Don’t touch me,” she spat, and again, her hands instinctively moved towards her belt with no weapon in it, as if she had somehow forgotten her early discovery.

“I do not wish to fight you,” The Hamato insisted, his voice softening a bit, gentle and reassuring. Almost paternal in a way that Casey resented. “I just need to get you out. Please.”

“Raph ain’t tryna… complain or nothin’, but do you think you could maybe hurry up so I could get outta here, too? ‘Cause unless you wanna take a turn holdin’ this you really gotta go first--” 

Casey frowned.

She bit her lip.

She looked between the lot of them.

She could still refuse.

She could still attack. Even without a weapon. She could still do damage-- she might even be able to overwhelm the turtle one long enough that he might lose his grip.

She took the Hamato’s hand. It was warm in hers and surprisingly soft, despite the calluses and blisters. He squeezed her tight and firm, his fingers laced together with her own, and with one mighty heave, he yanked her up and out of the elevator shaft. 

And then she was out of the elevator shaft. 

And she was all by herself. Surrounded by the enemy.

There was no Foot Clan here with her. She didn’t have a little button she could press to call them. She had no weapon. It was just her and six enemies. 

Every single one of them had their backs on her, all hunched over the space she had just crawled from, focused on getting Raphael out from under the shattered fragments of the elevator car. No one was paying any attention to her. 

No one was looking at her.

They had all turned their backs.

For just a second, her breath was a stone in her throat. 

And she turned and she ran.

---

Casey sucked in a long, steady breath. And she slowly let it back out. She adjusted her stance, allowed herself half a second to readjust her footing to something slightly more comfortable-- and then mentally scolded herself for doing so. 

Focus. 

Her mother said that the key to success was discipline and repetition. That practice would bring her to where she needed to go. She should have basics like this down by now, her mother had said. “You should be able to do this by now. I don’t know how to help with that.”

Her knuckles hurt, and her body was tired, but she wasn’t weak. And she didn’t give up, either.

100 reps down. 100 more. And then maybe she’d get this right. And if she didn’t-- 100 after that. 

She would keep going until she got it right.

---

The walk home felt long.

Her body was, admittedly, feeling quite wrung-out and sore at this point, and it resented her for dragging it through the streets of New York, but Casey was quite good at tuning out its protests. No one bothered her, as they rarely did-- anyone who looked at her for too long typically thought better of it as soon as she met their eyes. She knew how to convince people to think twice before they approached her.

She was in no mood for pests on the streets.

Coward, she thought bitterly to herself. They were vulnerable, and you ran. Instead of attacking you fled. You could have at least tried. You might have been able to take one or two down, if you actually tried… 

She was certain she would have lost the fight. But at least she would have fought. 

Even managing to injure one of the Hamatos would have been more valuable than her return to the Clan. She hadn’t been surprised to find the rest of the mall devoid of life, the remaining members of her party having long fled the scene. She knew that that was what they would do. That was the correct thing to do. 

She was surprised by how it stung. She thought that she knew better than that by now.

Just a day full of disappointment, then… 

Though she was tempted to make a beeline back to their basecamp, she knew better, and she took the long way to ensure she wasn’t being followed by anyone. It was late by the time she arrived. 

Brute had turned to look at her and gasped loudly, and though Lieutenant had a bit more self-control, she noted the way his eyebrows shot up.

“You’re back!” Brute cried in celebration, immediately moving to her side, clapping her hard on the back. Casey braced herself well enough that she didn’t stumble, though she would admit that it didn’t exactly feel good. “We thought for sure you got squished!--”

“Excellent work, Recruit,” Lieutenant observed, a bit calmer as he approached, as he often was. “We’re glad you made it back in one piece.”

“My apologies, Senseis--” Casey bit out, gritting her teeth and throwing her head down into a deep bow. “I failed to eliminate any of the Hamato Clan members!!! FORGIVE ME!!!”

The two stayed quiet for a moment, and Casey swore she could hear them exchanging looks.

“Yes, well, there’s always next time.” Lieutenant assured, patting her on the head a few times. “We’re just glad you weren’t crushed in an elevator. It is so difficult to find decent ninja trainees these days… So, well done!”

“Yeah. Go hit the showers,” Brute encouraged, offering a thumbs up and a grin.

And that was about the extent of the conversation.

Casey felt oddly numb. But she wasn’t sure why. Or what she expected. 

This was praise. 

She should be pleased. So she was having a hard time figuring out… why she wasn’t. 

Despite this cloudiness, her head still shot up before Baron Draxum even spoke a word to her, turning sharply to meet his eyes. He didn’t flinch, and neither did she.

“I’m relieved to see you made it back to us,” he remarked, cool and thoughtful, tilting his head to the side slightly. “Losing you would have been quite the blow to our organization. It’s a shame that more effort wasn’t put in to retrieve you…”

Casey narrowed her eyes, her hackles raising.

“My senseis put the well-being of the mission first,” she spat in response, wrinkling up her nose.

“Yes, I suppose so… It’s just difficult to watch them not place more value into such a clear asset. It’s quite obvious to me that your experience and talent is… under-utilized here. You have a great deal of potential that doesn’t seem to be being taken advantage of…”

Casey didn’t quite untense, her jaw still held tight beneath her lips. And she frowned.

“...You think I have potential?”

---

Leo has no idea why he did this. Looking back at it later, he thought, what the fuck were you thinking? Not the time or place, moron. They had finally gotten back home, gotten Raph all patched up, and had been assured by him about eight thousand times that he was okay. It was only after eight-thousand-and-one, “no, really, Dad, I’m fine’s,” and a promise from everyone in the room to keep an eye on him while he was gone that their father relented just enough to escort April back to her own apartment, with the reassurance of “I’ll be right back.” Everyone was still pretty spooked, because duh, no shit, and he really should have just kept his mouth shut. That was obvious now.

Maybe he was just still shaken up over the whole evening. His brain wasn’t working right, or whatever. He’s not really sure. It just… it just happened. He just said things.

“How come you didn’t listen to me?”

The words had left his mouth before he had even processed them. Raph paused, glancing over at his brother, all four of them curled up together on the living room couch, and the unsteady peace they had been resting in just a second ago was suddenly gone.

“What?”

“Before, at the mall,” Leo continued, even though what he meant to say was ‘nothing, nevermind.’ “I told you I had a plan, and you wouldn’t listen to me.”

He could feel his brother stiffen next to him. There was a beat of silence, and then Raph heaved out a big, heavy sigh.

“There was-- there was a lot goin’ on, Leo. We can’t always do your plans--”

“But you didn’t even listen to it,” Leo pressed. “You wouldn’t even let me tell you what I was thinking.”

“Leo--”

“I had a plan,” he insisted, his mouth working all on its own. “If we had-- if we had had a plan instead of just rushing in, maybe things would have-- I dunno, have gone better?”

“It’s not--”

“If we had a plan maybe you wouldn’t have gotten hurt. You could have-- you could have gotten for-real hurt, Raph!”

“Leo, st-”

“I don’t understand why you don’t trust me enough to at least list--”

“Trust you?” Raph snapped, whipping around to glare at his younger brother. Up until now, his voice had been strained, but now it was sharp and jagged, and he absolutely bristled. Leo found himself shrinking under his gaze. “Leo, how the hell are you gonna look at me and ask me to trust you right now?! The last time I trusted you, you almost died! You tried to freakin’ kill yourself! And you expect me to trust you!?”

Leo blinked in surprise. For a moment, he floundered, his mouth gaping slightly.

“Look, that was different! And I was the only one with a plan--”

“That doesn’t mean it was okay!” Raph cried.

“I--I mean. That plan went wrong, but I thought I was gonna be--”

“No you didn’t!” Raph bristled. “You didn’t think you were gonna be okay and you know it! You knew it was risky the entire time, so don’t try and tell Raph otherwise! I might’a been dumb enough to go along with it the first time, but I’m not dumb enough to believe that now!!! So just drop it, okay?! I’m not talkin’ about this with you anymore!”

Leo opened his mouth. And then he closed it again.

‘Cause he didn’t really… know what else to say. 

“Alright,” he finally said, looking down at his feet. Raph looked like maybe he still had more, but he bit his tongue, casting a long look at Leo before he finally tore himself away and stalked off. Mikey looked between the two groups, hesitating a moment, before he followed after their eldest brother with a weak ‘wait up.’

And for a moment there, it was just Donnie and him, sitting together in the awkward silence. Eventually, Leo found it in himself to speak again, laughing awkwardly, a bit bitterly, and hunching his shoulders.

“What the hell was that? Is he-- is he seriously not even gonna listen to me anymore?”

“Can you actually blame him?” Donnie said dryly, raising a brow, and Leo gawked.

“What do you mean can you blame him!? I have good ideas--”

“So?” Donnie scoffed, shrugging a bit. “It doesn’t matter if you have good ideas if they lead to you dying.”

Leo groaned loudly, rolling his eyes. “Look, I didn’t try to kill myself--”

“You kind of did,” Donnie cut off. “I mean. I understand that wasn’t your base intention, but we’re not stupid, Leo. You very obviously oversold your ability to get back down safely. You could barely stand after the Battle Nexus, and you thought you were going to be able to aim and land in a little pool of water? Not to mention that at that height, you would have been seriously injured even if the plan was entirely successful. We only went along with it because you were deceptive in what it entailed. And you could have died. Quite easily. And I don’t believe for a second that you didn’t know that,” he accused, though his tone was even and eerily calm, narrowing his eyes at the other.

Leo felt this little shiver run up his spine, and he wrapped his arms around himself. Suddenly, his feet were very interesting.

“I didn’t-- I didn’t think I would die--”

“Doesn’t matter,” Donnie dismissed. “It wasn’t okay. And just because you didn’t think you would die from this crazy, risky, self-sacrifice-y plan doesn’t mean you won’t. Or that you won’t in the next one, or the next one. So look. We’re not playing that game,” he said, his voice cold. “We’re not doing that again. So no. We don’t trust you. Obviously, we don’t trust you. You’re our brother, and we love you dearly. And that’s why we can’t trust you.”

Oh. Ow. Why the fuck did that hurt so bad? Leo’s stomach flip-flopped, and for a second, he bristled in retaliation, giving a soft little scoff.

“As if any of the rest of you wouldn’t try to pull off the same thing if you had the chance! Don’t stand there and pretend like I’m the only one in the family for a penchant for dramatics! You jumped on Angie before, too!” He hissed, throwing up his hands. “You guys would all try to take the bullet, too!”

Donnie shrugged.

“Yeah. Maybe. But I wouldn’t trick the rest of you into setting it up.”

Leo grit his teeth.

“We all trusted you. And we went along with your plan,” Donnie continued, his voice hard. “We helped you. And you almost died. You could have died,” he pressed. “You’re important to us, Leo. How do you think the rest of us would have felt?”

Donnie’s brows furrowed.

“How do you think I would have felt? Or Raph?” He challenged. “How do you think Angie would have felt? Good Galileo, how do you think Angie feels right now?”

Leo kept quiet, considering this for a second, rolling the thought around in his head. And he didn’t like it.

He was suddenly getting the feeling that he had fucked up really bad over a month and a half ago, and it was just now sinking in.

“Look, I know you want to protect us,” Donnie said, crossing his arms over his chest. “We get it. Raph gets it. Of course Raph gets it, have you ever met the guy? He’s basically the world’s number one advocate for any and all ‘protect my brothers’ campaigns,” Donnie scoffed. “But that doesn’t mean that you can just throw yourself around as an expendable variable. If he hadn’t caught you, you know how much that would kill him.”

Leo groaned softly, burying his face in his hands. “Aw, man…” He muttered. “Maybe I do need a therapist…”

---

“Cut it out,” Raph said, hooking out a hand to grab Leo’s ankle as he ran past him, promptly sending his younger brother stumbling down to the ground. Leo squeaked in surprise as he fell, turning to huff and give his brother an annoyed glare.

“Why?!”

“‘Cause I said,” Raph replied easily, a teeny little grin growing on his face. “And I’m in charge.”

And it was true.

I mean, really, he had been ‘in charge’ lots of times in the past, frequently tasked with ensuring his little brothers didn’t wander off or do anything dumb. But he hadn’t ever, in all his memories, been in charge like this. Never all by himself.

He wasn’t the only one excited, he knew. All three of his brothers were nearly bouncing off the walls with joy at the prospect of being left home alone for the first time. Finally! At long last! The day every pre-teen waited for… they had the house all to themselves for the whole evening with no supervision. No babysitter or neighbor watching them for the night while their Dad was out… Just him and his brothers with a whole empty house to themselves. They could do whatever they wanted, and they had every intention of taking full advantage of the situation, like a reasonable child might.

“That’s not a good reason!” Leo protested with a scoff. 

“Well, the other reason is you’re startin’ to piss Donnie off,” he hummed, releasing his grip on the other’s leg, allowing him to squirm away. Donnie was happy for the reprieve of being chased by his twin, climbing over Raph and hopping up onto the couch behind him, grabbing the nearest blanket to wrap around himself like a shield and sulk. Leo sighed loudly, rolling his eyes, clearly displeased with the end of his game, but he didn’t protest either, sitting himself back up. 

“I got snacks!” Mikey announced proudly as he came bounding down the basement stairs, his arms filled with just about every form of junk food that they had in the house, and even some that Raph hadn’t even known that they had in the house. He dumped the loot down on the coffee table, and the brothers all immediately dug in, each grabbing at chips, Capri Suns, and ice cream containers and laying their claim.

“What are we gonna watch?” Mikey asked excitedly, curling up on the couch, bouncing up and down in place.

“Whatever we want,” Raph replied smugly from his own placing on the floor, continuing to scroll through the channels, remote in hand. “We just gotta find somethin’ that looks--”

“OH!” Leo gasped from the couch, jumping slightly and pointing at the TV. “Let’s watch the new Batman movie!!! Look! It’s barely even started!!!”

Mikey hesitated for a second, his brows knitting. “But Dad said we’re not allowed to watch that,” he fret.

“Which is exactly why we should!” Leo had countered. “We’re home alone. We can watch whatever we want. Besides, Batman is cool!”

“Do you think we’d get along with him if we met him?” Mikey questioned with a thoughtful sigh.

“Maybe,” Donnie said, shrugging a bit.

Raph furrowed his brows just a bit as he deliberated. Hm. Well. Leo did make a pretty compelling argument. They were home alone. Therefore, they could do whatever they wanted! Besides, he wasn’t afraid of a dumb movie, especially not a superhero movie. 

“Alright. Batman it is!” He agreed, clicking definitively on the remote to select the channel before tossing it aside. 

And goddamn, did he feel cool.

That lasted for maybe about forty minutes.

And the movie was cool! I mean. At first. But then evening had turned into night, and it had gotten dark outside. Even worse-- it had begun to rain. It rained hard, too, and Raph heard thunder rumble off in the distance, shaking the house ever so slightly. And the further into the plot of the movie they got, the more Raph began to understand why it was rated “R.”

They watched the whole thing, with all four of them frozen in place the whole time. It wasn’t until the credits rolled that Raph finally swallowed, turning his head slightly to glance at his younger brothers.

He was almost relieved to see that they were about as terrified as him. It wasn’t a scary movie, per se, there were no jump scares, it was just…

That was really messed up, what the Joker did to those people!!! Okay!?

Mikey was absolutely clinging to Leo for dear life, his eyes lined with tears, and Donnie had all but disappeared under his blanket, peering out cautiously from within. Even Leo looked shaken, even as he swallowed, forcing a very shaky, half-hearted laugh.

“Whoa. That was… cool,” he forced, even though he looked sort of like he was going to throw up. “Right, guys--?”

Thunder cracked outside and all four of them jumped. Mikey straight up shrieked, burying his face against Leo’s shoulder, and Raph had half a mind to leap up and throw himself into a pile with his brothers and hide there. 

But he steeled himself, just barely catching his nerves before they launched him into a panic, his hands curling into determined fists. 

He was in charge. Remember?

“It’s-- it’s just the storm, guys. It’s alright,” he tried to soothe, fighting to keep his voice steady. “It’s fine--!”

“THEY BURNED A GUY’S FACE OFF!” Mikey wailed tearfully in response, and Raph winced.

“Mikey, chill! It’s just a movie!” Leo insisted, a nervous grin on his face. “I mean. N-none of it’s, like, real, or anything!”

“What if it was?!” Mikey squeaked. “What if it’s based on a true story or something!? Or what if someone else watches it and it inspires them to break into people’s houses and put bombs in their chests!? And what if they come here and cut us open and put bombs in our chests!?”

“That’s… Highly improbable,” Donnie bit out, and Mikey whimpered.

“But it could happen!!!”

Raph grit his teeth, inhaling deeply, and then slowly letting the breath back out.

“It’s gonna be fine, Mikey. Leo’s right. It was just a movie. You don’t gotta be scared,” he insisted. He could tell his brothers weren’t quite convinced. He scooped up the TV remote again, switching the television over the cartoons. It was just re-runs of something they had seen before, but what did it matter? “Here. Hang on. I’ll be right back.”

“Where are you going!?” Mikey squealed.

“Raph’ll go double-check to make sure no one can get in,” he said. “So you guys know for sure we’re safe. Alright? I’ll be right back.”

Mikey whimpered, but none of them had protested, watching with wide eyes as he approached the stairs. And if Raph was being totally honest with himself…? He really didn’t wanna go up there.

‘Specially not by himself.

But he had little brothers to protect. A part of him told him that they weren’t in any danger, but another bit said what if they were?! What if Mikey was right and someone came and broke into the house or something!? 

He was in charge. Dad left him in charge. And he had to make sure that they were all safe and could handle anything that came their way.

So that meant he had to go double-check. 

Biting the insides of his cheeks, he made his way up the stairs.

Somehow, the house seemed darker than usual, even though it was just the same as it always was. Rushing slightly, Raph hurriedly made his way to the front door to check it. And, just as he had expected, it was locked. Just like it was supposed to be. The back door was locked, too, and Raph sighed softly in relief. 

He checked all the windows, all the way up to the attic on the fourth floor. He checked every single room to make sure there was no one hiding inside, either. He grabbed blankets from each of their beds, as well as one of his stuffed teddy bears, and did a final sweep on his way back down to the Lair.

“It’s okay!” He assured as he made his way back down the stairs, re-joining his younger brothers. “I checked everything, and there’s no way anybody could get in!”

“Are you sure!?” Mikey questioned, his eyes wide. “What if someone tries to break in or something?”

“I’m sure,” Raph assured firmly. “Raph checked all the locks. And the windows! And look. I got extra blankets and stuff, too,” he added, tossing the covers over the couch and over top of his brothers. “Here. You guys scoot over, and we can play Mario Kart until Dad gets home,” he said, glancing down at his siblings with a grin. “And once he’s here, no one would be dumb enough to mess with us anyway! So don’t worry.”

---

For the thousandth time in this day alone, Yoshi wondered if it would be wiser to pull his children out of school, out of all their various sports and extracurriculars, and keep them home instead, with him, where it was safe. Or at least safer. Where he could keep his eyes on them and know that, if nothing else, he could act should anything happen. They would have more time for training, too, he sometimes noted, but that thought alone made every nerve in his body twist in on itself. 

How could he do that to them? The thought of keeping them here, away from school and from friends and from hobbies, and training instead made him feel sick to his stomach. The idea of training alone made him sick. Every time he closed his eyes, all he could see was his eldest child falling away from him.

He had tried at least a dozen times now to say, “no, no more of this, I won’t allow you to be involved any longer,” and every time his (darling, wonderful, beloved) bullheaded children resolutely denied him and insisted that they would find a way to be involved whether he liked it or not. And while he hemmed and hawed over somehow taking more drastic measures to keep them safe, over how he could possibly achieve this and if it was possible to do so without them resenting him for the rest of their lives, time marched on with the same degree of stubbornness. 

It was impossible not to feel like he was running out of time.

The apartment was too quiet. He resented himself for being in the safety of it when his children were not, even if they left of their own volition. 

Yoshi sighed deeply, and found himself sinking down into his reclining chair before he even knew he was doing it. Internally, he scolded himself. There were things that needed to be done; housework that needed doing, phone calls that needed to be placed, and children out in the world that he had to keep track of, even if they weren’t home at the moment… (All the more reason to stay on his toes…) but honestly, he was just…

Tired.

It had been some time since he had been able to sleep at night, and he was beginning to think that melatonin was a scam or something. How could he sleep? How was he meant to sleep at night with everything looming over him, dripping wetly down his spine, burning and hot and threatening…? When the safety of both the world and his family hung in the balance, and each were equally as precious…? He grumbled softly to himself, leaning his head back and staring up at the ceiling, glowering at it as though it were personally responsible for the current state of his world.

He had only intended to sit for a while. Just to take a moment to rest, to get a chance to breathe before he got up again and continued with all the things he still had to be on top of… 

But he must have fallen asleep.

Because the next thought he had was,

Oh. This hasn’t been familiar for a while.

Not just the place-- he hadn’t been here in many, many years. This long, endless expanse of inky darkness, somehow warm and cozy despite the utter, infinite darkness of it all. He could hear whispers off in the distance, just barely tickling up against the edges of his brain. He hadn’t been in this place in a long time.

But it was also him. Looking down at his own hands, outlined in this soft white light, he noted the differing shape to him. How the wrinkles were gone from his knuckles, and each digit instead extended out smooth and slender, calloused but confident, and yet perfectly manicured.

He didn’t have to look to know that the rest of him was this way, too.

It almost felt odd to be back in the body he had inhabited in his twenties; to look like Lou Jitsu the Actor again, to feel like him. Back before the mutation. Back before the Nexus-- to feel like a young man with a career and dreams and ambitions, to be that person once more who had broken away from their family and escaped, and who held onto all the hurt and guilt of it, but who kept moving anyway. That person that he used to be, but couldn’t be anymore.

It almost felt odd. But somehow, it didn’t-- not quite. He noted it, was aware of it, and thought to himself, hm. This is certainly interesting… But really, it didn’t feel all that strange to him. It felt completely natural. 

He felt so calm. He was sitting here, surrounded by nothing but darkness and his own aura, a halo of snow white silhouetting him. His body was different from what it had been a few moments ago, but he felt completely at peace. That almost felt odd, too, but still didn’t quite. It didn’t bother him that his body was different now. If anything, it was a comfort.

He wondered for a second why in the world he was here again, after so much time, when a voice rang out from behind him.

“Welcome back, Yoshi.”

Blinking in surprise, Yoshi turned to face the other occupant of his dream.

[ next ]

[tobiasdrake]

Digimon Adventure 01x30 - The Digimon's Great Traversal of Tokyo / Almost Home Free

Previously on Digimon Adventure: The Chosen Children searched for the Eighth Child in Hikarigaoka's local library, where they were able to look up a copy of the OVA and remember the plot. Mammon tried to cause a ruckus when they got to the Parrotmon part but it's okay 'cause Garudamon stepped out and took care of it.

The Chosen Children and Tailmon's mercenaries have all failed to find the Eighth Child in Hikarigaoka. But the Children have learned much about how they were Chosen.

This episode comes with a trigger warning: Human adults being child predators.

We open on PicoDevimon reporting back to Vamdemon about what happened.

Vamdemon: What? Garudamon has been sighted? PicoDevimon: Yes, sir. It's been reported that the Chosen Children have arrived in this world. Vamdemon: Have you located the Eighth Child yet? PicoDevimon: We're currently raising our efforts and expanding our search perimeter.

As he speaks, we see glimpses of Tailmon and a few mercs no longer in silhouette.

Tailmon is roaming around the city, continuing her manual search from last episode.

Wizarmon is street performing at the amusement park to lure in children so he check the counterfeit Crest against a crowd.

SkullMeramon is skulking about in a trenchcoat watching children like a creep.

Gesomon is patrolling the waterways. I... guess he's looking for water children?

(Wizarmon is the stand-out smart guy of the bunch. He's letting the children come to him in an innocuous fashion. SkullMeramon, meanwhile, is likely to be reported to police by concerned onlookers. As he should; He has hostile intentions towards children.)

Vamdemon: The children must also be looking for the Eighth Child. Hurry! We cannot let the children gain the upper hand! PicoDevimon: Yes, sir!

Almost no change in the dub, with the exception of silence-breaking dialogue added to the shots of the searching Digimon.

DemiDevimon: We're looking everywhere! Air, land, and sea! We've got it covered, no problem!

I'm as confused by why the Eighth Child would be in the air as I am by why she'd be in the sea.

Then again... frame of reference. Aerial children and aquatic children are completely normal where Tailmon and PicoDevimon come from.

Meanwhile, the children make plans to leave Hikarigaoka.

Taichi: If the Eighth Child's not here in Hikarigaoka, we should hurry up and look in other places. We can't waste time here or Vamdemon will get ahead of us. Mimi: But couldn't they just be goofing off somewhere? Koushiro: No, I don't think so. The other connection between all of us is.... Sora: We all moved away from Hikarigaoka? Koushiro: Yes. Unless that is a coincidence, we should assume that the Eighth Child also moved. Taichi: So they could be in Odaiba like us? Koushiro: That is our most likely possibility. Mimi: (excited) I want to go home! Taichi: Yeah... Alright, let's head for Odaiba first!

Irony: We didn't actually need to come to Hikarigaoka and spent all that time manipulating Fujiyama for nothing. And now we have to find a way to reach Odaiba 27 miles away, because we got off our transport to Odaiba so we could come to Hikarigaoka.

The dub skips the discussion of why we're going to Odaiba. Tai is convinced right from the get-go that the Eighth Child is in Odaiba, for reasons unexplained.

Mimi: Can we get a snack before we go looking? Tai: There's no time. We've got to get to Odaiba and find that Eighth Kid before somebody else does! Mimi: How will we get there? Do you think there's any fast food places along the way? Tai: Would you knock it off about the food? Anyway, we've only got enough money for our subway tickets. Joe: Subway? Oh, wow. My parents won't let me ride the subway by myself. Tai: You're not by yourself. Now come on! Mimi: Are subways like regular trains? I mean, do they have snack cars? Tai: JUST DROP IT!!! And stick together, everybody. It can get kind of confusing down here.

They also tweak Mimi's dialogue so that Tai can yell at her. This one's a bit odd, in that it actually fits Mimi's established characterization from the original pretty well. As we know from the Kentarumon episode, Mimi's stubborn when she's hangry. So, unlike the Valley Girl bits, this bit is rooted in her original persona pretty well.

But I'm still miffed that Mimi gets three lines in this scene and they're all prompts for Tai to tell her to shut the fuck up.

Also, Joe gets one too. Pretty much the entire scene has been replaced with Tai dunking on Joe and Mimi to show how much of a boss he is. Izzy, the actual main character of this scene, doesn't even get a word in.

The Chosen Children descend into the incredibly complex Tokyo rail network.

Jou: Let's see... The fastest way to reach Odaiba is.... Mimi: (shrug) I can't tell because there's so many routes available. Koushiro: (laptop) Please wait just a minute. The fastest way to get there is... If we take the Toei #12 Line from here to Nakano-sakaue, transfer to the Marunouchi and Ginza Lines and leave from Shimbashi, the Yurikamome route will take us to Odaiba. Taichi: Okay then! (approaching ticket machine) Let's head to Nakano-sakaue first.

Glad we have Koushiro here to Computers our way through the incredibly intimidating Tokyo rail network because Jou probably would have been here all day and Mimi, I'm sorry but you are no help here.

In the dub, Joe starts us off with a quip and Mimi's still on about the food.

Joe: I just hope Myotismon has as much trouble reading this map as I do. Mimi: Okay, what do we do now!? Besides starve to death! Izzy: I'm just figuring it out. ...okay, that'll work. Now, the fastest route to Odaiba is to take the #12 train to Nagano and transfer to the Marunouchi Line. Then transfer to the Ginza and get off at Shimbashi. Mimi: ...huh? Tai: Sounds simple enough. (approaching ticket machine) Now we just have to figure out the right fare.

Surprisingly, Izzy relays Koushiro's directions for navigating the Tokyo subway system almost word for word.

He cuts Nakano-sakaue down to "Nagano". Point off for mispronouncing it, but dropping the "-sakaue" isn't necessarily wrong. Nakano-sakaue is the name of the subway station for Nakano Ward, so both ways of saying it work.

In a refreshing change of pace, this scene is completely unafraid to be in Japan. They even show us the subway map unedited, with all of its Japanese text marking the different stations intact.

While Taichi's buying tickets, the Digimon chime in.

Koromon: (hops up on the counter) Hey Taichi, what's that? Taichi: A ticket. This is what we use to ride the subway. Palmon: Subway? Patamon: What's that? Jou: Shhh! Don't talk so much in front of other people. This place isn't like your world. If anyone sees you talking, they'll cause a fuss. Sora: Listen, while you're here, you need to pretend to be stuffed animals. You can't move around, okay? I know it's going to be tough, but please bear with it. Pyokomon: Okay, I understand! I won't talk or move. It's much easier to be carried around by Sora anyway. (wiggles and sings) Hehe ~Sora~-- Sora: I just said not to move!

It's not easy being Digimon in the human world. I feel for them. I'd hate to have to pretend to be a plushie all day too.

(Oh, so that's why Mimi's so hungry. Off-model Chonky Patamon ate all the food. Now he can see through time.)

The dub follows the script until it gets to Sora and Yokomon. Pyokomon's bit is a callback to her and Sora's first episode on File Island, but the dub cut the clingy ~Sora ~Sora ~Sora conflict from the episode so the callback doesn't work here. Instead, Yokomon has an idea.

Sora: Yeah, while we're here, you've got to pretend to be toys or stuffed animals. But remember to keep still and no fidgeting. Yokomon: Here's an idea! I'll be one of those dolls you told me about. The kind where you squeeze them and they go... (wiggles and sings) ...WAHH! WAHH! WAHH! Sora: Be a doll that doesn't talk!

Once the tickets are purchased, IT'S FIGHTING TIME!!!

...wait, what?

While the Chosen Children wait for the train, Tsunomon and Koromon start chatting despite what Jou said a moment ago.

Koromon: Is this a cave? Tsunomon: It's a weird cave. Yamato: (hisses) Hey! Be quiet. Announcer: The train is arriving on time. Please remain behind the white line.

Hearing the rumbling of the approaching train, the two Baby Digimon grow concerned.

Koromon: W-What's that sound? Tsunomon: Is that a Digimon's voice!? Koromon: LOOK!!! THERE'S SOMETHING GLOWING IN THE CAVE!!! Tsunomon: That's it! It must be one of Vamdemon's minions!

Before Taichi and Yamato realize what's happening, Koromon and Tsunomon leap onto the goddamn train tracks to fight the oncoming train.

Taichi: HUH!?!? Yamato: TSUNOMON!!!

They realize their mistake once they see the train approach. It's not super clear how Koromon and Tsunomon survive this, but they're intact after it passes and seem to have pressed themselves against the back wall to avoid being hit.

Fortunately, this train is apparently not stopping here and speeds right on past. I guess that one isn't not ours.

In the dub:

Koromon: It's some kind of cave. Tsunomon: I don't like being underground. Yamato: Hey! Put a lid on it. Announcer: Attention, attention. #12 train now arriving at platform 7. Koromon: What? Where'd that voice come from. Tsunomon: You heard it!? Then it's not just inside my head! Koromon: SOMETHING'S COMING!!! Tsunomon: LOOK AT THOSE GLOWING EYES!!! IT'S ONE OF MYOTISMON'S GOONS!!! (Koromon and Tsunomon leap onto the tracks) Tai: HEY!!! Matt: Watch out!

The dub puts a commercial break right here, moments before the train threatens to splatter Koromon and Tsunomon. Which is honestly a great place for it. A+ commercial placement. Solid cliffhanger to keep the kids from changing the channel.

It also claims that this is the train we're waiting for. Which makes it odd that the train doesn't stop at our platform. Excuse you, we would like to get on, please.

The kids board the subway with their "stuffed animals".

It does not go well.

The seven Chosen Children have a row of seats to themselves on the crowded train, with their Digimon in their laps.

Taichi: (angrily) Making me worry....

Taichi punches Koromon in the head for that stunt.

In the dub, it's:

Tai: We can't take you guys anywhere!

Suddenly, they overhear a baby crying. A woman, forced to stand for lack of available seating, is trying to soothe her crying baby. Sora stands up, offering her seat to the woman.

Mother: There, there. Stop crying and be a good boy. Sora: (stands) Um, here you go. Mother: Oh! Thank you so much. (sits, patting her baby) Good boy... Good boy... Don't cry.

Suddenly, the baby stops crying. He sees Pyokomon in Sora's arms. Without warning, he reaches out and grabs her pistil.

(RUDE. In case you are not familiar with the anatomy of a flower, that orange stem sticking up from Pyokomon is her pistil. It's the female sex organ, containing her seed pod. The yellow ones are her stamens, which are male sex organs that produce pollen for germinating the pistil. Flowers have both.

This child is basically yanking Pyokomon's ovaries. Her pistil and stamen may be strictly aesthetic but it's still rude!)

The child's mother is oblivious to the yanking, having shut her eyes to enjoy a blissful moment of rest once her child stopped crying.

Sora: E-Excuse me. Mother: Huh? ...oh, I'm so sorry. Come on....

She tries to pull her child's hand off of Pyokomon's pistil, but that infuriates the boy. He starts yelling and tugging harder, as if trying to rip the pistil out.

Mochimon: ...that has to hurt....

Finally, Pyokomon reaches her breaking point and screams.

Pyokomon: THAT HURTS!!! STOP PULLING ON ME!!!

The entire train goes deathly quiet.

In the dub:

Mother: Aww, there now. Hush. Come on. Sora: (stands) Here, take my seat. Mother: Huh? Oh! Thank you! (sits) Wasn't that nice of that girl? We've been on our feet all day, haven't we? (The mom shuts her eyes and the baby starts yanking on Yokomon) Sora: Uhh! Excuse me! Mother: Huh? Oh! What are you doing now!? No... (The mother tires to pull the baby's hand away; The baby yanks harder) Mother: No no, honey! Let go now! That's the girl's toy. Come on! Honey! Motimon: Ouch, that's gotta hurt. Mother: Oh come on, honey. Let go of the girl's toy before you break it! HONEY.... Yokomon: HEY!!! WILL YOU LET GO OF ME!?!?

The mother gets some silence-breaking dialogue during the hard yanking, which comes through pretty well here. We don't really see much of the mom after that initial attempt, so the implied continued effort to control her child is good for the scene, I think.

Also, "We've been on our feet all day, haven't we?" is a lovely addition to the scene. I really like the dub's take on the mom here.

I do think the original version of Pyokomon's outburst hits harder than Yokomon's. Pyokomon breaks protocol because her pain tolerance has hit its limit and she can't take any more of this torture. Motimon tries to sell it and we do see Yokomon grimacing in pain, but Yokomon's line just sounds like she's mad that her personal space is being violated.

For a good ten seconds after Pyokomon's outburst, you can hear a pin drop. Then a kid points and shouts.

Kid: IT TALKED!!! THE DOLL TALKED!!! Sora: (lightbulb) That must have hurt! You poor thing! There, there....

Sora gently pets Pyokomon and whispers the plan to her. From here, when Pyokomon speaks, Sora covers Pyokomon's mouth with her hand and subtly moves her own lips to make it look like she's throwing her voice.

Sora: (whisper) Play along with whatever I say. Pyokomon: U-Uh-huh. Sora: (loudly) But you know, the baby only did that because he really likes you, Pyokomon! Pyokomon: Really? Sora: It's true! So forgive him for what he did, okay? Pyokomon: I'm sorry for yelling at you.

The plan works. The baby starts laughing and having a good time.

The dub starts this scene with another Good Actually silence-destroying line, with a bewildered Sora attempting to explain. Meanwhile, the pointing kid is noticeably played by Izzy's actor trying and failing to differentiate his voice by putting on a Rough Kid tone.

Sora: ...I guess my toy didn't like when you pulled on it.... Kid: Did you hear that!? That stuffed animal talked! Sora: ...AH! It worked! All that practice is paying off! Fooled 'em, didn't we? (pets Yokomon and whispers) Hush, just keep quiet and play along.

In the original, Pyokomon speaks while Sora subtly but visibly moves her lips to disguise the source of her voice. Sora holds her hand over Pyokomon's mouth to disguise the movement of Pyokomon's own mouth, so it looks like the one speaking is really Sora.

In the dub, Sora tells Yokomon to keep quiet, then she badly attempts to imitate Yokomon's voice with her subtle lip flaps.

Sora: Come on! The baby pulled your hair because he likes you, that's all! Sora-Yokomon: Oh, really? Sora: There's no reason to bite the poor thing's head off! Sora-Yokomon: Oh! I'm very sorry I shouted!

Since Sora has no experience with ventriloquism and obviously can't be throwing her voice correctly, I'm not sure why the dub ploy works. There's also no reason for her to be covering Yokomon's mouth, since Yokomon isn't saying anything.

The plan works well and the crowd buys it. In fact, the plan works too well.

Kid's Father: Oh, she's doing ventriloquism. It's really the young lady who's speaking for the doll. Isn't that amazing? Bystander 1: It's just ventriloquism. Bystander 2: I really thought it talked! Bystander 3: Obviously, it couldn't have!

The other Chosen Children, watching Sora's near-disaster with bated breath, finally exhale. Everything looks to be ov--

Kid: I want one! Dad, I want that doll! Buy it! Buy it! Buy it, Dad! Come on, buy it! Father: (gets up and approaches Sora) Excuse me, miss. Sorry to bother you, but where did you get that? Sora: W-Where...?

The other kids watch Sora with fear and horror on their faces once more. How the hell is she supposed to answer this question? Ten seconds of silence pass as Sora struggles to think of something to say.

Announcement: (bing bong) Nerima. This is Nerima. Please exit to your right. Sora: ...the... NERIMA DAIKON DEPARTMENT STORE!!! Father: Aha! Thank you!

Father, son, and every other passenger all rush out the door at once, leaving the Chosen Children alone on the train. Except the mother and baby, who wait for the rush before departing much more calmly.

Mother: (to Sora) Thank you very much. (disembarks) Pyokomon: Farewell!

At long last, we are out of the danger zone.

Over in the dub, the pointing kid manages to be even more obnoxious, and the father fills those ten seconds of silence with dialogue.

Kid: I want one! Daddy, give me that toy! I want that doll! If I don't get one RIGHT NOW I'LL START SCREAMING AT THE TOP OF MY LUNGS!!! Father: Shhh. (gets up and approaches Sora) Excuse me, young lady. Can I ask where you bought that doll? I need one right away. Sora: Uh... Where I bought it? Father: It's not that hard a question, is it? Come on. You'll be doing me a big favor. Where did you find it? Announcement: This stop is Nerima. Please watch your step. Again, this stop is Nerima. Sora: Ohh... THE NERIMA DEPARTMENT STORE!!! Father: What? Nerima! Thanks a lot! Come on, son! (Crowd races out; Mother stands up to leave last) Mother: (to Sora) Thanks again. (disembarks) Pyokomon: Goodbye!

Nobody does pushy, entitled brats like Americans. We are the MVP of spoiled rotten children. And spoiled rotten adults, too. That the Japanese father patiently waits for Sora to come up with her answer while the American father jumps down her throat and won't let her think seems very fitting of both cultures.

Though he's actually supposed to be Japanese in both versions so... IDK.

Now that we're finally alone in the car and we've managed that crisis, the kids start to relax. Sora returns to her seat and everyone breathes a collective sigh of relief.

Sora: That was a close one. Taichi: I thought we were goners for a second there. Jou: What is the Nerima Daikon Department Store? Sora: No idea. Takeru: I'm tired.... Mimi: Now that my tension's drained, I'm starting to feel sleepy.... Yamato: Yeah, me too.... Takeru: Hey, where are we supposed to get off again? Koushiro: At Nakano-sakaue.... Takeru: Nakano... sakaue....

Coming down off the adrenaline surge and already tired from a long day, the children drift off to sleep.

In the dub:

Sora: Wow, that was a close one. Tai: Pretty weird how nuts that kid went over Yokomon. Joe: If we don't find the Eighth Child, we could go into the-- Sora: --toy business? T.K.: How much longer? Mimi: Who knows? Someone wake me when we get there. Matt: Yeah, me too. T.K.: What's the name of the stop where we're getting off again? Izzy: We get off in Nagano. T.K.: Okay... Nagano....

We lose Sora's admission that she made up the department store she just sent those people to, which is a funny punchline replaced by an awkward quip about selling toys if Myotismon kills Kari.

We also lose Mimi's exposition that coming down off the adrenaline high is why the kids are suddenly taking inappropriate naptime.

By the time the train pulls into Nakano-sakaue, the children are fast asleep.

Patamon wakes up to the announcement they've arrived.

Announcer: Nakano-sakaue. Nakano-sakaue. Please exit to your right. Patamon: Nakano...saka... Huh? Why aren't we getting off here? Palmon: Shh. Don't talk.

Patamon claps his front paws over his mouth and hushes up. The train doors close and the train continues on its way.

In the dub, an interesting thing occurs with the announcement. The sign over the door in the original has the kanji for "Nakano-sakaue" in orange lettering, with red English lettering under it that says the same.

Despite all the uncensored Japanese lettering we've seen up to this point, apparently that sign is a bridge too far. Odd place to draw the line in the sand, given that this one comes with built-in English next to it, but okay.

The dub edits it for the "Nagano" station, so that it just has large, orange English lettering. The new orange lettering spells out "Nakano-sakaue".

Announcer: This stop is Nagano. Please watch your step. Again, this stop is Nagano. Patamon: Ohh! Huh? Hey! Here's our stop! Loo-- Palmon: We're supposed to be quiet.

So chalk this up to yet another example of the people editing the animation not communicating with the scripting team, I guess. The voice saying "This stop is Nagano" plays while the Nakano-sakaue sign is front and center onscreen.

At least it's not as bad as Shogunmon.

Eventually, the children wake up to find themselves at the wrong stop.

Sora: Huh? Jou: This is... (Cut to the sign) Jou: SHINJUKU!?!? GACKKKKK!!! Taichi: WE SLEPT THROUGH OUR STOP!!! Takeru: Patamon, you were awake!? Patamon: Yes. Takeru: Why didn't you wake us up!? Patamon: Because you told us not to talk. Children: (collective heavy sigh) Jou: Should we go back to Nakano-sakaue? Koushiro: No. I think we can still transfer to the Marunouchi Line from here.

In the dub, it's Mimi that notices where they are. Tragically, she does not make angry throat noises.

Sora: Ugh... huh? Tai: Huh? Joe: Whuh? (Cut to the sign) Mimi: HOW'D WE MISS OUR STOP!?!? Patamon: All of you slept right through it. T.K.: Patamon, you were awake!? Patamon: Sure! T.K.: What's wrong with you!? Why didn't you wake us up!? Patamon: How could I? You told us not to make a sound! Children: (collective groan) Joe: What now? Go back to our stop? Izzy: No. It's out of our way, but I think we can change trains here and be okay.

With the exception of Jou's angry throat noises, this is otherwise mostly the same. The other main difference is that they give Patamon a line for T.K. to react to. In the original, Takeru just sort of... somehow knows Patamon was awake, without explanation.

So this one goes down as a rare improvement over the original.

As the kids make their way through the station, appetites begin to flare up.

Koromon: Hey, Taichi, I'm hungry.... Tsunomon: Me too.... Palmon: So am I. Taichi: Deal with it. I'm hungry too, y'know. Mimi: I want to eat a hamburger.

Yes, Mimi is actually craving a hamburger in the original. "Watashi hamburger tabetai." That is not a dub line change. The thought of a hamburger, in fact, brings the group to a halt.

Sora: A hamburger? Yamato: I haven't had that in a long time.

Then they just stop. Looking to one another with glum expressions; The weight of this simple pleasure they've been deprived for so long hanging over everybody's heads. Seven seconds of silence pass as everyone processes what they've been missing. Finally broken when Mimi offers everyone a pleasant smile to try and raise the mood.

The dub plays this straight from the start, but then breaks script at Mimi's line and extends conversation to break the silence that follows.

Koromon: How much longer? I'm getting awful hungry, Tai! Tsunomon: Yeah, I'm starving! Palmon: Famished! Tai: It can wait. Hey, I'm hungry too, y'know! Mimi: I keep visualizing cheeseburgers. And I don't even eat cheeseburgers! (Group stops, beat) Matt: It has been a long time since any of us have eaten. And our Digimon get weak when they're hungry. (beat) Tai: ...okay.... Mimi: (pleasant smile)

Tonal shift. The English scene uses the burgers to point out that the kids haven't eaten since arriving in the human world, rather than that they've been away at war for several months. This is a tactical conversation, rather than a lingering realization of mutual hardship.

Additionally, it's Tai that cheers Mimi up by agreeing to get food rather than Mimi attempting to cheer everyone else up by putting on a brave face.

Two members of our nakama, however, are suspiciously absent from this conversation.

Jou and Koushiro navigate a crowd of people, trying to find their way.

Koushiro: The Marunouchi Line.... There are a lot of stations here. Jou: (calling over the noise) LISTEN UP, EVERYONE!!! BE SURE TO STAY CLOSE BEHIND US AND.... Uh.... (beat) Jou: (meekly) Hey, Koushiro? Koushiro: What is it, Jou-san? Jou: (meekly) Everybody's gone. Koushiro: Eh!? Jou: Honestly, where did they all go!? Koushiro: Oh, right. (pulls out Digivice) If we use this, we can find where everyone is right away! (looks at it) Wait. Why isn't it reacting? It worked fine when we were in the Digimon's world. Jou: Maybe it broke when we got here. Koushiro: (shakes the Digivice) That can't be right.

Koushiro tries shaking his Digivice to rattle it into working. I see he's finally beginning to side with Taichi on the topic of percussive maintenance.

As they walk, a woman in cosplay offers Jou a free sample of something.

Woman: Here you go.

Gomamon opens his mouth and happily bites it out of her hand.

Woman: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! (beat) Jou: AHHHHHHHHHH!!! THIS IS A TOY!!! A TOY!!!

Jou very unsuspiciously runs like hell while screaming "It's a toy" over and over at the top of his lungs. We are doing such a good job of keeping a low profile. :D

In the dub, Izzy and Joe seem to have psychically predicted that we'd be going for food because they are not looking for the Marunouchi line.

Joe: This place is a zoo! And not a restaurant in sight. The first one to see someplace to eat, give a shout, okay? ...huh? (beat) Joe: Oh, uh, hey, Izzy? Izzy: What is it? You see something? Joe: The other guys. They're gone. Izzy: WHAT!?!? Joe: I can't believe this! They ditched us! (groan) Izzy: Okay, okay. Don't panic. (pulls out Digivice) As long as we have this, we can always find them. (looks at it) Huh? That's funny. Why isn't it working? You think something might have happened to it when we came back to the real world? Joe: All I know is that this is one of those days where everything goes wrong. Izzy: (shakes the Digivice) Come on!

He also has a different terrible excuse for the sample incident.

Woman: Free samples! Gomamon: (chomp) Woman: AHHHHHHHHH!!! (beat) Joe: Uh... BAD DOG BAD DOG!!! (runs like hell)

So it seems like, in the dub version, Koushiro and Jou were just offscreen during the last scene and then this one takes place chronologically after. Tai and the others ditched them once they'd all decided to go look for food.

This is particularly weird, given how Jou will react to them finding food later in the episode.

In the original, they weren't in the scene because they'd already gotten separated. Koushiro and Jou were not privy to the hamburger depression spiral.

Jou and Koushiro leave the subway to look for the rest of the group. We're treated to an ominous and tense sequence of Jou and Koushiro hurrying down the sidewalk one way while SkullMeramon in his trenchcoat comes around the other side of the building.

As they approach collision, suddenly Jou spots the other kids. Taichi and the others are eating hamburgers in an upper floor of a building across the street, visible through a window.

Jou: AAAAAAAUGH!!! There they are! Koushiro: EHHHHHH!?!?

Against all odds and reason, despite the Digivice trackers not functioning, Jou manages to find the other kids with nothing but the notion that they're probably somewhere in Shinjuku to go off of.

(This would make way more sense if the trackers still worked. Why turn them off, show? Is it because you left a Digivice at Hikari's house during Taichi's visit and then realized that her having that would completely destroy this entire Search for the Eighth Child plotline?)

I guess his Senpai Sense told him where to go. His wards are kinda misbehaving....

In the dub, Joe and Izzy's exclusion continues to be extremely rude for reasons unknown.

Joe: Huh!? LOOK!!! THEY'RE EATING WITHOUT US!!!

Fucking jerks. They'd better have a good explanation for this.

Suddenly, Jou and Koushiro get the green light to go. Miraculously, a pair of workers carrying a large painting walk by, with the painting obscuring them from SkullMeramon as they pass in front of him. Jou and Koushiro continue on their way and SkullMeramon on his, neither aware of the other's presence.

Inside the restaurant, five of seven Chosen Children enjoy the first taste of greasy Western fast food they've had in years.

Taichi: Ahhh! Delicious! Mimi: So good! Sora: I almost forgot what this tasted like! Tsunomon: This isn't fair, Yamato! You get to eat tasty stuff like this every day! Yamato: Be a little quieter while you're eating. What if the other customers see you? Mimi: No one is paying attention to us, though.

Jou and Koushiro enter and approach their table.

Mimi: Huh? Takeru: It's Jou-san and Koushiro-san! Taichi: Hey! You guys should get something to eat too! The food's amazing! Jou: (quietly fuming) You... You guys didn't use your fare money for this, did you? Mimi: (cheerful) Yeah! We used all of it!

Jou fucking drops Gomamon on the floor and hangs his head, despondently groaning and shaking.

Sora: Sorry. We just couldn't resist the temptation of hamburgers. Jou: A-All of you... (eruption) WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU ALL THINKING!?!?

Suddenly, Jou's stomach rumbles, undermining his outburst. He slowly turns beet red, then storms off to go order food.

Jou: (furiously) I'll eat. I'll eat using ALL OF THE MONEY THAT I HAVE!!!

Guys, I think we broke Senpai.

Fujiyama was right when he tried not to let us go to Hikarigaoka. Now we're stranded in Shinjuku burning our fare money on McDonalds.

In the dub:

Mimi: I feel like a new woman! Tai: Man! Tastes great! Mimi: Yum-ilicious! Sora: Boy, I sure needed this! Tsunomon: You people are lucky! Yum yum! You get to eat this stuff every day! Matt: A little louder, why don't you? There's a couple of people that aren't staring yet. Mimi: Actually, nobody noticed yet but Matt's right, you should-- (gasps, seeing Joe and Izzy enter) Ohhh! Patamon: Uh-oh. T.K.: Joe! Izzy! Well, it's about time. Tai: Hey, what are you guys waiting for? Order something! Joe: How? When you guys have got all the money? Huh? Mimi: Whoops! We went and spent it all! Joe: (drops Gomamon, hangs head, and starts shaking) Sora: See, we were all so hungry, we ordered the super duper combos. Joe: Great. You spent it all? (eruption) THAT WAS ALL THE MONEY WE HAD IN THE WORLD!!! (Joe suddenly stops for no clear reason. He slowly turns beet red, then storms off) Joe: (muttering) Of all the dumb, greedy, selfish little things. It's unbelievable. These guys are supposed to be my friends! My friends! My friends!

Completing the dub-exclusive saga of Joe and Izzy being on Team Restaurant, it turns out he's upset in this version because they spent all the money on food for themselves and didn't get him anything. After ditching him and Izzy in the subway.

This scene is super ambiguous with regard to how malicious the other kids are being. On the "This is unapologetic bullying", we have the fact that they ditched Joe and Izzy in the subway to begin with. Why did they ditch them?

Patamon even gives out a little "Uh-oh" when Joe enters, like he's realizing they're about to be caught red-handed betraying Joe and Izzy. That "Uh-oh" is peculiar if they aren't doing anything wrong.

They just. Stole away with all the money, then burned it all on themselves and let Joe and Izzy starve. Fucking assholes. Joe's usually a target for the American group's bullying but what did Izzy do to deserve this? He's been trying to help them navigate the subway! Pricks! All of them pricks!

...part of me appreciates that Mimi gets to be on this side of the bullying for once.

But on the other hand, Tai's just like, "Hey, order food!" when he sees Joe. So. Like. It's possible they just got separated, like in the original. And also Tai somehow doesn't know they inexplicably pooled their money in this version, even though one of them has the entire money pool? I guess?

Who did we trust to carry the money pool? Because that person is still a complete fucking asshole. That kid knew they were screwing Joe and Izzy, even if the others forgot somehow. That kid should have said something when they were all ordering "super duper combos".

Probably goes without saying that I like the Senpai Meltdown version better, right? Because if they really did maliciously ditch Joe and Izzy, steal all the money, and go splurge on themselves, that is unacceptable character assassination of every single kid at this table. They would not fucking do that.

They made questionable choices in the original too, but they aren't actively hurting other members of their nakama in the process. Jou and Koushiro can still eat. This slap in the face to Joe actually made me angry.

Anyways. Moving along.

While Jou is furiously ordering his own food, Koushiro checks his Digivice to find that it's showing radar blips for everyone now.

Koushiro: The Digivice is reacting. Sora: It's because everyone's here, right? Koushiro: No. I mean, when I looked at it earlier, it wasn't reacting at all. Sora: That's strange. Koushiro: Maybe it only works at short distances in this world.

You were also in the subway when you checked it, Koushiro. We should consider the possibility that you had bad phone reception.

This is the human world. We have signal limitations. You can't coast on the fabric of reality itself being made of wifi anymore.

(This makes it even weirder that the writers turned off Digivice Tracking for the Shinjuku search then turned it back on right after they miraculously found everyone.)

Mimi: Hey, more importantly, where do we go from here? Takeru: Yeah, we don't have any money so we can't ride the trains anymore. Yamato: How do we get to Odaiba for free? Taichi: Hehehehe... Leave that to me! I have a fool-proof plan. Yamato: (curiously) Do you, now?

In the dub, Izzy's chat with Sora has no changes. T.K. brings up an idea for how to get home.

Mimi: That's great but, meanwhile, what are we going to do now? T.K.: We start walking. They won't let us back on the train without any money. Matt: I'm sure not looking forward to walking all that way. Tai: Ha! I know a way that won't cost us a penny! Just leave everything to me! Matt: (sarcastic) Oh, great. You're a genius.

I like that they discuss walking in the dub, because it is a viable option. It would suck but Shinjuku is close enough to Odaiba that we can walk if we must.

The kids are about 9 miles from home right now. It would take them probably 3-4 hours to get there, but they're now well-fed and they're all at least somewhat athletic after several months of exploring the Digimon World on foot. It would be nice if an alternative means of transit could be employed, but we should at least consider walking.

It can't be worse than Etemon's desert.

The kids head outside to put Taichi's master plan into action.

Taichi holds out his thumb to hitchhike, but the cars speed right on by.

Taichi: HEY!!! SOMEONE GIVE ME A RIDE!!!

Then he tries jumping, screaming at the top of his lungs, and flailing his limbs like a wildman for attention.

Taichi: HEY HEY HEY HEY!!! COME ON!!! LET ME IN!!! Yamato: Oh, come on. Hitchhiking in this modern day and age? Koushiro: It's not as easy as it looks on TV.

A car almost hits Taichi because he's out too far in the road. They honk angrily at him while he screams back at them.

Car: HONK HONK!!! Taichi: THAT'S DANGEROUS, YOU MORON!!! Yamato: Speak for yourself. Jou: It will take three days for Taichi to get us a ride. Koushiro: Agreed. Taichi: I'd like to see you try it, then! Jou: YEEP!!! U-Us!?

The dub cuts the shots of Taichi holding out his thumb to hitchhike. We go straight to Tai jumping and flailing his limbs.

Tai: HELP!!! POLICE!!! MY CAT IS STUCK IN A TREE IN ODAIBA AND I'VE GOT TO GET THERE RIGHT AWAY SO I CAN GET HER DOWN!!! HEY!!! Matt: The police!? That's his brilliant idea!? Izzy: If the police do stop, they'll lock him up for disturbing the peace. Car: (nearly hits Tai) HONK HONK Tai: HEY!!! I've got the right of way! Matt: (sarcastic) Looking good, Tai. Joe: Good grief. At this rate, we could be sitting here all day. Izzy: And night. Tai: THEN YOU TRY AND GET US A RIDE!!! Joe: Me!? No way! Tai: How about you, Matt!? You think you're so smart!

I'm going to guess this was edited because they didn't want children to see their heroes hitchhiking and try to copy it, or something like that. The 90's were really nervous about imitable acts on children's television.

It's the reason Spider-Man could grab a crate with his webs and smash it on a bad guy's head but was forbidden from throwing a punch. Children can't grab crates with webbing but they can throw punches, and parents thought if they saw Spider-Man punch someone, they might start punching people.

So now Tai's plan to get to Odaiba is to scream at random passing cars that he wants the police. You know, they probably had a phone back in the diner. You could call the police. On the phone.

Taichi makes Jou and Koushiro try next, in retaliation for their mockery. They both awkwardly stick out their thumbs.

Jou & Koushiro: ...y...yay?

Multiple cars speed by and honk at them. Realizing this isn't working, they both exchange uncomfortable glances, then take a deep breath.

Jou & Koushiro: Ready. Set.

And then they begin screaming at the top of their lungs and flailing their limbs like wildmen.

Jou & Koushiro: YAY-AY-AY-AY-AY-AY-AY-YIIIIII!!!

And it fucking works. A car pulls up to the restaurant to let them in.

It's. Uh. It's a taxi. The taxi closes its doors a moment after, presumably after being informed they do not have money, and drives away. Jou and Koushiro hang their heads in failure while the other kids laugh.

(Still better than Taichi managed.)

Yamato takes the third attempt.

It does not go well.

Yamato takes a deep breath and slowly, reluctantly, puts out his thumb. The instant his thumb is raised, a pedophile pulls up to the curb.

Yamato: (blush) Woman: (sultry) Hi~! Come in, little boy. Yamato: (blush intensifies)

Yes, she is doing graspy fingers with that hand up there. It's incredibly uncomfortable. Cut immediately to Yamato reporting to the others, still blushing and bowing his head in embarrassment.

Taichi: WHY DID YOU SAY NO!?!? Yamato: WE COULDN'T ALL FIT IN THAT CAR!!!

Taichi and Mimi both grin and giggle at Yamato, implicitly teasing him for what they all know just happened.

Asshole behavior from the both of them but in their defense, children don't know better. They don't have the perspective to understand how fucked up that was. That's why it's the responsibility of adults to protect them from shit like this. Yamato was just accosted by a legitimate Stranger Danger.

No surprise: The dub heavily edits this scene to remove the pedophile. Matt stands there for a moment, but can't even bring himself to... do whatever he would do since we aren't hitchhiking. He just turns right around to the others in failure, with a blush of embarrassment.

Tai: I'm waiting! Matt: (turns around in surrender) Tai: NOT SO EASY, IS IT, MATT!?!? Matt: WELL, AT LEAST MY CAT'S NOT STUCK IN A TREE!!

Then Tai and Mimi grin and giggle at him, presumably entertained by his snappy comeback.

The dub then puts Izzy and Joe's attempt here, moving it to third place after Matt's. Like Tai, their initial thumb-out try is cut so their attempt at hitchhiking can be disguised as something else: They're intentionally trying to hail a taxi despite being broke.

Joe & Izzy: (deep breaths, then flailing) HEY HEY TAXI TAXI OVER HERE TAXI HEY TAXI TAXI Taxi: (pulls up) You kids want a cab? Joe & Izzy: YEAH!!! Taxi: You got any money? Joe & Izzy: ...no.

This was almost as bad an idea as hailing the police. I don't know why they thought they could take a taxi for free.

Finally, Sora and Mimi take their turn.

Sora & Mimi: Take us to Odaiba! Jou: It will definitely work this time. Koushiro: Girls are better at this. Mochimon: That's right. The men will be all over them! Koromon: Is that how it works, Taichi? Taichi: Yep!

Sure enough, a blue minivan pulls over pretty quickly. We don't hear the conversation between Sora and Mimi and the occupant of the car.

Takeru: Someone stopped! (Sora and Mimi turn towards the others and give them okay signs) Jou: Yes! It's okay! Taichi: Hehe! Piece of cake! Koromon: (awestruck) So that's how it works....

Teaching Koromon very dangerous behaviors here. We have learned nothing from Yamato's attempt.

Dub Sora and Mimi don't even get to make an attempt. The driver of the minivan is reimagined completely. The car just pulls up all of a sudden, unprompted by anything. They even edited the footage to erase Sora and Mimi with their signs from the scene of him pulling up.

Driver: Sora!? Sora: It's my cousin! Hi, Duane! Duane: Need a lift? (Sora and Mimi turn towards the others and give them okay signs) Mimi: YAAAAAY!!! Sora: Alright! Mimi: GIRL POWER!!!

Mimi, how is Sora having a cousin a triumphant moment of girl power? Why are you even over at the car?

The dub then moves the scene of the boys grossly commenting on the girls' ability to lure in vehicles to after "Duane" shows up.

T.K.: Her cousin!? Joe: What are the odds of that happening? Izzy: One in 4.2 million. Motimon: Whatever! I'm just glad we have a ride! Koromon: Excuse me, but what's a cousin? Tai: Skip it.

Just like that, the hitchhiking sequence is complete and the censors can go cry themselves to sleep in a closet somewhere for how much work that was. (Wait 'til we get to Pinocchimon.)

As the minivan makes its way, the visibly unhappy driver calls out:

Driver: Those of you in the back! Everyone in the back: Yes?

Small note: He's trying to address the boys, but Japan's frequently gender-neutral language causes a small miscommunication and Sora answers with them.

Driver: You're extras that Sora-chan and Mimi-chan brought with them. Understood? Boys: (resigned) Yes, sir. We're extras. Driver: Extras better keep quiet. Otherwise, I'll dump you on the side of the highway or something. Boys: (resigned) Yes, sir. We'll be quiet.

The car pulls up to a red light.

Driver: Would you like some candy, Mimi-chan? Mimi: Yes! Driver: (gives a candy to Mimi) You too, Sora-chan. Sora: Thank you.

As the driver passes the candy back, Pyokomon's eyes follow it. She opens her mouth, wanting, but behaves herself and doesn't say anything. Sora, seeing what Pyokomon wants, quickly feeds the candy to Pyokomon rather than eating it herself.

Taichi whispers to Sora from the back.

Taichi: (whispers) What's the deal with this guy? He pisses me off. Sora: (whispers) It can't be helped. After all, he is taking us to Odaiba. Jou: (whispers) Actually, are we sure that he's taking us to Odaiba?

Senpai coming in with the real questions now that it's too late to back out. He really shouldn't have let us do this to begin with. What would Fujiyama say, Jou? He trusted you.

In another brief near-encounter with one of Tailmon's mercenaries, Wizarmon, carrying balloons, leads a group of children over the crosswalk in front of this creep's car.

Mimi, too, feeds her candy to Palmon rather than eating it herself.

In the dub, Duane lays down the same obnoxious rules. Kinda weird that Mimi's riding shotgun in Sora's cousin's vehicle, gotta say.

Duane: Okay, here's the rules. I'm gonna say this once, so listen! Everyone in the back: Yeah? Duane: You're only here 'cause Sora's my cousin. You're like her luggage. Boys: (resigned) Yeah. We're like her luggage. Duane: And luggage doesn't make a sound. You got me? Or else it's liable to get itself thrown out of the car, right? Boys: (resigned) Right. Luggage doesn't make a sound. Duane: (to Mimi) You want some gum? Sugarless. Mimi: Sure. Duane: (gives one to Mimi) How about you, Sora? Sora: Thanks, Duane. (takes the gum and feeds it to Yokomon) Tai: (whispers) Hey, Sora, I think your cousin's a major lame-o. Sora: (whispers) He's sorta the black sheep of the family. But he's giving us a lift, so be nice. Tai: (whispers) I will! But just make sure he takes us to Odaiba.

Jou's concern about Stranger Danger running off with us is a valid thing to worry about. Not sure where Tai thinks Duane is going to take us, though.

Also, the weirdness of Mimi being up front continues. Why isn't she luggage? Is it for creepy reasons? I bet it's for creepy reasons.

While Tailmon's mercenaries continue expanding their search of Tokyo, PicoDevimon rides the ferry and complains.

PicoDevimon: Vamdemon-sama's always beating and shouting at me. It won't get better unless I can achieve something soon. Where could that kid be?

Over in the dub, he's having a crisis.

DemiDevimon: How did I ever get into this!? Knocking myself out searching for some pipsqueak kid! I've got half a mind to chuck this whole lousy job! But... The master might not like that....

I feel DemiDevimon. This job sucks. Aimlessly wandering around the city hoping to stumble onto a person is the worst way to find someone. The Eighth Child is a needle in a haystack. A haystack that is hostile to discovery of your true identity.

So. Like. A haystack full of bees. And fourteen wasps.

In the car, the nameless driver blasts deafening music. Mimi tries to get his attention.

Mimi: E-Excuse me, Onii-san! Driver: (head banging to the music) Mimi: ONII-SAN!!! Driver: Eh? Did you say something? Mimi: COULD YOU PLEASE TURN DOWN THE VOLUME!!! Driver: Eh? What did you say? Mimi: VOLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUME!!! Driver: Bathroom? You need to go? Mimi: THAT IS NOT WHAT I SAAAAAAAAAAAID!!!

In Japan, it's common to use respectful familial terms like onii-san to address older people. By addressing the driver as Onii-san, Mimi is respectfully addressing him as an older man, but not so much older that otosan (father) or ojisan (grandfather) would be more appropriate.

Before this argument can continue, the driver's music is interrupted by a news broadcast.

Reporter: We interrupt this broadcast for important news. A few hours ago in the Nerima district, a bombing occurred near the housing complexes of Hikarigaoka. This may have been responsible for putting telephones, wires, and optical cables in Hikarigaoka into temporary disservice. Investigations are underway in the local area. We will bring you a news update if anything is uncovered. In other news, unconfirmed sources have insisted that an elephant and a huge bird were witnessed at the scene of the crime. Investigation into these claims is also currently underway. Driver: Whoa! An elephant! Freaky. It must have escaped the zoo! Hehe! Reporter: There is some speculation that this incident may be related to the terrorist bombing that occurred four years ago in Hikarigaoka. To those just tuning in, a few hours ago in the Nerima district, a bombing occurred near the housing complexes of Hikarigaoka....

Haha. Hahaha. Hahahahaha we are wanted fugitives that's great.

In the dub, Duane calls Mimi "babe", confirming that she's up front for creepy reasons.

Mimi: Excuse me! Do you mind? Duane: (head banging to the music) Mimi: EXCUSE ME!!! Duane: Oh, what's up, babe? Mimi: THE RADIO'S KIND OF LOUD!!! Duane: The tunes are kinda what!? Mimi: LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUD!!! Duane: The radio? It's too loud? Mimi: MAYBE JUST A LITTLE!!! (news report interrupts) Reporter: And now for a news update. Officials have yet to find a clear explanation for the devastating explosion that rocked the Highton View Terrace apartments in the Nerima district earlier today. Power in the area is still out and the injured are still being counted after the bizarre incident. While official sources have offered no further information, there are reports of several eyewitness accounts. However, these accounts have only served to further mystify investigators. The details of their accounts differ but several of these eyewitnesses agree that an elephant and something described as a giant firebird were seen in the vicinity. Duane: (laughing) A giant WHAT!?!? Firebird!? Hehe, you gotta love the crazies in this town, HAHAHA!!! Reporter: When asked about the accounts, officials would give no comment. A similar incident took place at the Highton View Terrace Apartments four years ago. It's unknown if there is any connection between the two.

Mostly the same, but of note: This is actually darker in the dub. The dub blames the electrical chaos in Hikarigaoka on Mammon which isn't entirely wrong. The original instead talks about a power outage and "still counting the injured", meaning there were a lot of human casualties from the fighting between Mammon and Birdramon/Garudamon.

According to the dub, while we were drifting in and out of OVA flashbacks, people were exploding and being crushed by debris offscreen.

You know, it's funny the driver mentions going to the bathroom because Koromon suddenly has an emergency right there in the car. Taichi manages to dodge aside just before Koromon would have shit on his lap, causing it to hit the seats instead.

Driver pulls over and everyone evacuates immediately to escape the smell.

Jou: GAAAH IT STINKS!!! Driver: (furious) ...you bastards... WHO THE HELL JUST TOOK A DUMP INSIDE MY BELOVED CAR!?!? Taichi: ...sorry, I-- Sora: ME!!! IT WAS ME!!!

Sora takes the fall for Koromon, likely realizing that the guy isn't going to treat her the way he would one of the "extras".

Her lie is terrible, of course. She was in the passenger side of the second row, while Koromon pooped in the center seat of the back row. It's actually quite impressive, given that Taichi was in the back row passenger side and jerked away towards the center, which would push Koromon towards the door. But Jou was sitting in the center seat there.

In order to make this happen, Koromon would have had to leap for it, hurdling Taichi to dive-bomb projectile-shit at Jou, who clearly scrambled out of the way as Koromon deposited right between his legs. I take it back, this is way worse than ditching Joe at lunch.

I guess he panicked and was hoping Senpai would take care of it.

In any case, Driver takes a moment to process the claim that a girl like Sora would do something so vulgar.

Sora: I'm so sorry. I'll be sure to clean up all of it! Driver: ...LIAR!!! I know you'd never do something like that, Sora-chan! The one sitting in the back was... you, right!?

The driver correctly identifies Jou as the occupant of that seat.

Jou: Eep!? Driver: Don't try and fool me with that nice guy face of yours!

The driver grabs Jou angrily by the his collar. Koushiro tries to pull him off.

Koushiro: Please stop! Driver: SHUT UP!!!

The driver backhands Koushiro away, sending him stumbling back into the barricade. Both barricade and Koushiro go over the edge, plunging off the bridge.

In a subtle moment of characterization, despite being in the clutches of this (rightfully angry but still) asshole, Jou-senpai is more concerned with Koushiro's wellbeing than his own. His eyes are on Koushiro after the backhand, and he screams when Koushiro goes over the edge.

The dub, for once, lets a poop be a poop. They don't even edit out the onscreen shot of it. I guess there was no way they were going to be able to claim it was hair gel or whatever.

Duane: WHOA!!! WHAT IS THAT!?!? Tai: Koromon, you couldn't wait!? Duane: Okay, who did it!? HUH!?!? WHICH ONE OF YOU MADE A MESS ON MY NEW SEAT COVERS!?!? Tai: ...I'm sorry, I-- Sora: RIGHT HERE!!! I'm the one! Duane: Huh? Sora: I'll clean it up. I'll even detail it for ya! Duane: ...RARGH!!! Don't try covering up for these losers! Which one of 'em was it!? (Driver looks around, then spots Joe) Duane: YOU!!! Mr. Peepers! IT WAS YOU, WASN'T IT!?!? Izzy: Hey, let him go! He didn't d-- Duane: Back off! (backhand)

Sora trying to take the fall works just as well for Cousin Duane as it does with the creep who wanted to be alone with minor girls. The sentiment is pretty similar: She knows he won't lash out at her the way he would the others, so she steps up to try and de-escalate.

They did cut out the driver's reasoning for blaming Jou, though. Duane just seems to select him arbitrarily.

They also put another well-timed commercial break in right as Izzy goes over. Once again, good spot for a cliffhanger..

As Koushiro goes over the edge, Motimon suddenly evolves into Tentomon to catch him by the ankle. Trying with all his might to lift Koushiro. Unfortunately, something else is lurking in the river, which notices the Chosen Child suspended in the air.

Tentomon: (catch) Koushiro: Tentomon! (They drop a foot sharply) Tentomon: Ack! Heavy.... (Gesomon explodes from the water) Tentomon: IT'S GESOMON!!! Koushiro: Gesomon!?

Gesomon is an Adult-stage Virus-type Mollusk Digimon. Their name comes from the Japanese word gesou, which are the tentacles of a squid.

Gesomon is not a Nightmare Soldier. They're from the Deep Savers line; One of the few non-Nightmare Soldier's we'll be facing in the Tokyo sub-arc.

Narrator: Gesomon. A Mollusk-type Virus Digimon. Their special attack, Deadly Shade, paralyzes their enemies! Driver: AHHHH!!! A SQUID BAKEMONO!!! (runs away) Gomamon: I can handle ocean Digimon!

Remember bakemono, shapeshifting yokai who impersonate people, animals, and objects? The driver accuses Gesomon of being a bakemono in the guise of a squid. Which. Isn't that far off, really.

In the dub, Tentomon quips about Izzy's weight.

Tentomon: I've got you, Izzy! (catch) Izzy: WAAAAAUGH!!! Thanks, Tento! (They drop a foot sharply) Tentomon: Eugh, you had to have that extra side of chili fries, didn't you? Izzy: Hey, what's that!? (Gesomon explodes from the water) Tentomon: Yow, it's Gesomon! Izzy: It's what!? Tentomon: (rundown) Gesomon. Take a bit of everything nasty that lives underwater, stick them together, and that's him. Duane: YOU KIDS ARE ON YOUR OWN!!! (runs away) Gomamon: Good riddance! You were a lousy driver anyway!

Izzy didn't get to eat chili fries. He and Joe went hungry. I have no idea what Tentomon is talking about. Unless they were lying to Joe about spending all the money and then bought Izzy a meal after Joe left? I guess that's what happened.

Man, this dub plot point just gets worse and worse.

Gomamon hits the water and evolves into Ikkakumon.

Driver: AHHHHHHHHHH THERE'S ANOTHER ONE!!!

While creepy driver offscreen becomes the next person to shit himself, Ikkakumon attacks, bashing Gesomon back with a headbutt. Gesomon tries to slap one of their tentacles down from above. Ikkakumon sidesteps, then fires a Harpoon Vulcan point-blank through another of Gesomon's tentacles. The missile penetrates Gesomon's claw and detonates, blowing the limb to shreds.

In the dub, Duane bailed much more concretely than Driver so he doesn't get to scream and cry about Ikkakumon's arrival. What we get is a line from Tentomon while he and Izzy flutter offscreen.

Tentomon: I think we'll just get out of the way!

Like Mammon, Gesomon is one of those bestial Digimon that doesn't speak, but the dub lets him nonetheless call attacks in English. When he tries to slam his tentacle down on Ikkakumon, he calls it "Coral Crusher".

This extremely public kaiju brawl draws spectators.

A crowd gathers around the Chosen Children on the bridge.

Bystander 1: Senpai, look at that! Bystander 2: Are those kaiju!? No way! Bystander 3: Dad, get the camcorder! HURRY!!! Bystander 4: They're pretty well made. Bystander 5: Do you think they're real? Bystander 4: That's impossible. This must be some kind of event.

Meanwhile, in a nearby cafe on an upper floor of a building, three girls have a bird's-eye vantage of the kaiju brawling in the river.

Girl 1: It's so annoyi-- Girl 2: EH!?!? WHAT IS THAT!?!? Girl 3: Awww, they're so cute!

At a rest stop, one salaryman gets a drink from a vending machine while another reclines on a bench; The fight raging behind him. The first salaryman suddenly sees the fighting and stops in his tracks.

Salaryman 2: What's wrong? Salaryman 1: (sigh) I can't even. (drink)

I guess this is happening now.

XD That salaryman is the entire vibe of my generation.

In the dub, it's ads.

Bystander 1: HOLY COW!!! WHAT'S GOING ON!?!? Bystander 2: They must be advertising something! Bystander 3: Advertising something!? Get out of here! Bystander 4: Maybe they're shooting a movie! Bystander 3: I don't see any cameras! Bystander 4: Oh well. Maybe they're just rehearsing.

Bystander 3, get out of here with your naysaying. Also, Bystander 2 was ahead of his time. Modern-day Digimon would stop what they're doing every five minutes to tell you about Surfshark.

Girl 1: And so then do you know what he said? Girl 2: OH! WHAT'S THAT!?!? Girl 3: What's going on over there!?

And Zero Fucks Salaryman remains a legend.

Salaryman 1: Rough day at work, huh? Salaryman 2: Eh, you know. Same old, same old. (drink)

Finally, Ikkakumon strikes the killing blow: Stabbing Gesomon straight through the head with his horn and driving him down into the water. We're spared any shots of impalement, as Gesomon implicitly dissolves into pixel dust offscreen after being submerged.

Since Gesomon dies underwater, the bystanders are also spared from having to see that. The only confirmation of Gesomon's death is that the fight music dies down and Gesomon's counterfeit Crest is seen floating down the river.

(Another Digimerc isn't going home.)

Bystander: (disappointed) What the hell? It's already over!? Driver: ...oh, right! The kids!

Too late for him, the kids are already gone. I guess he'll have to clean Koromon's poop out of his car by himself.

(Honestly, probably for the best. I'm not saying it's good that we pooped in his car, but Mr. "You're all just Sora-chan and Mimi-chan's luggage!" did not have good intentions and was probably going to pull some dudebro shit when we got to Odaiba. So bailing on him in the chaos is a good idea.)

The dub adds a silence-breaker when Ikkakumon stabs Gesomon.

Bystander 1: My money's on the big hairy one!

Then, after Gesomon's implied disintegration:

Bystander 1: (same as the previous comment) Aww, they're gone. Too bad! Bystander 2: Man, did you guys see that? Duane: Sora? HEY, SORA!!! Where'd all those kids go!?

Dub Sora is not so lucky as original Sora, as she will most certainly get an earful from furious relatives over the poop we left in Duane's car.

With new transportation options opened up, the children tie logs to Ikkakumon and swim to Odaiba. It's Jou's Digimon so he gets the seat of honor. Sora and Mimi get to ride on Ikkakumon's back while the boys take the logs.

Sexist, but they were the ones who got us this far by putting up with being leered at by a pervert. If we'd gone with the convertible lady then maybe Yamato could be on Ikkakumon's back.

Yamato: We drew a big crowd back there.... Taichi: Couldn't be helped. Oh, well! It'll all work out. Jou: Set course to Odaiba. LAUNCH!!! Narrator: And so the Children made their way safely to Odaiba. However....

PicoDevimon: I've found you. I must inform Vamdemon-sama right away! (flies off) Narrator: Where could the Eighth Chosen Child be? Vamdemon's night draws closer.

Yeah, those skies are looking pretty sunset-y. We close on the ominous reminder that Vamdemon will be loosed upon Tokyo soon.

In the dub:

Matt: Well, so much for keeping a low profile. Tai: At least we got away from Lame Duane and we're all in one piece! Joe: Nice work, Ikkakumon. You NAAAAAAILED him! Ikkakumon: RAAARHAHAAAA!!! Tai: Anyway, wouldn't you rather travel in the fresh air than under the ground in that subway? Sora: Oh, yeah! This is great! Tai: And best of all, it's free!

Since Tai and Sora are filling space where the Narrator should be talking, they have to play a really noticeable game of "Only speak when the camera isn't on you". The camera is on Sora and Mimi for Tai's subway line. Then Sora speaks when it shifts to Tai, Matt, and T.K. And then Tai starts talking again as soon as it moves to Izzy.

DemiDevimon: Here's good news! Now that they've shown themselves, we can finally take care of them! (flies off) Tai: Next stop: HOME!!! Kids: YEAH!! WOOHOO!! WE'RE GOING HOME!!! Mimi: Does anybody have something to eat? Tai: Ugh, Mimi, not that again! Mimi: I was just asking!

The episode closes on one last Mimi gag for good measure.

Assessment: The hitchhiking portion of this episode made me feel my age. Watching these children get sexually harassed by people old enough to drive is deeply uncomfortable. But creeps like the ones these kids ran into are a genuine peril of attempting this.

The dub censored that sequence heavily because, I guess, they don't want kids to try doing what the Chosen Children were doing. But the original sequence goes to great lengths to examine the perils of what the Chosen Children were doing. Yeah, we don't want children hitchhiking, here's why.

In fact, points from me for pointing out that boys can be victimized by predatory adults too. It's not just something that happens to girls. Both Yamato and Sora/Mimi get preyed on by exactly the kind of people who would eagerly pick up isolated 11/10-year-olds off the side of the road, though Yamato gets it much more directly.

This was a terrible idea that Taichi had.

The dub, meanwhile, was very polarized. This episode's dub has high highs and low lows. Some fantastic dubbing and even a scene that's improved on the original one minute, and then total dipshittery the next.

This is the meanest episode to Joe and Mimi that the show's been yet. Mimi got it in quantity but Joe got the fucking "Ditch Joe and go eat" bit. A bit which wound up becoming a plot hole later on when Tentomon clearly mentions Izzy eating.

...wait a second, why can Dub Gomamon evolve? Shouldn't he also be starv-- Holy shit, did they feed Gomamon too? Joe did drop him in the diner before storming out. It really was just Joe that they screwed?

[moldwood]

i've had a bluesky for probably a year or so but have never ever used it because i don't have the energy or time for more than one social media. until tumblr dies i'll be here 99% of the time, but art may start to be posted over there at least. all that is to say i logged in to make sure i still had the urls and saw this on the homepage feed whatever

I CANNOT IMAGINE THE WORLD TWITTER USERS HAVE BEEN LIVING IN WHERE THIS IS MINDBLOWING. COULD YOU IMAGINE NOT BEING ABLE TO edit:im adding a read more for the people on mobile. don't click it. it's just to prove a point about the ridiculous number of characters you can have in a tumblr post

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp… under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of… …9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as… Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right.

At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything?

We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow.

Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal… - Is it still available?

Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler.

Barry, what do you think I should… Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine… What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector!

Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow… the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This… Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that… …kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement?

I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you… I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway… Oan I… …get you something?

Like what? I don't know. I mean… I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look… There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you…? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then… I guess I'll see you around.

Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again… for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but… Anyway… This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well… - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's… human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that?

They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up… Sit down! …really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering.

A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah.

What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? 

Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung.

Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week… He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots… Next week… Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?!

You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting… - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively?

A privilege. Mr. Benson… you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you.

No. - No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say… Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but… the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right… there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that?

Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night… My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it.

Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers… Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute… Are you her little… …bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but… - So those aren't your real parents!

Oh, Barry… - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! - Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order! Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is there much pain? - Yeah. I… I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting someone? I can't explain it. It was all… All adrenaline and then… and then ecstasy! All right. You think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but they don't check out! Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke. Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking.

That's it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub. Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I actually heard a funny story about… Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case. Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man?

What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? - What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Oongratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames… But it's just a prance-about stage name! …unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Oan't breathe. Bring it in, boys! Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Oannonball! We're shutting honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is everybody? - Are they out celebrating? 

They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now… Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not happy. I thought their lives would be better! They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? - What did you want to show me? - This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting. Doesn't look very good, does it? No. And whose fault do you think that is? You know, I'm gonna guess bees. Bees? Specifically, me. I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. It's notjust flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. That's our whole SAT test right there. Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. And then, of course… The human species? So if there's no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn't it? I know this is also partly my fault. How about a suicide pact? How do we do it? - I'll sting you, you step on me.

Thatjust kills you twice. Right, right. Listen, Barry… sorry, but I gotta get going. I had to open my mouth and talk. Vanessa? Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. It's the last chance I'll ever have to see it. Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this. I know. Me neither. Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports. Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? Roses! Vanessa! Roses?! Barry? - Roses are flowers! - Yes, they are. Flowers, bees, pollen! I know. That's why this is the last parade. Maybe not. Oould you ask him to slow down? Oould you slow down? Barry! OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. Yes, it kind of is. I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you with the flower shop. I've made it worse. Actually, it's completely closed down. I thought maybe you were remodeling. But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined. I don't want to hear it! All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen. I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got. - Bees. - Park. - Pollen! - Flowers. - Repollination! - Across the nation! Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, Oalifornia. They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy. Security will be tight. I have an idea. Vanessa Bloome, FTD. Official floral business. It's real. Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. Thank you. It was a gift. Once inside, we just pick the right float. How about The Princess and the Pea? I could be the princess, and you could be the pea! Yes, I got it. - Where should I sit? - What are you? - I believe I'm the pea. - The pea? It goes under the mattresses. - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I'm getting the marshal. You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! Let's see what this baby'll do. Hey, what are you doing?! Then all we do is blend in with traffic… …without arousing suspicion. Once at the airport, there's no stopping us. Stop! Security.

You and your insect pack your float? - Yes. Has it been in your possession the entire time? Would you remove your shoes? - Remove your stinger. - It's part of me. I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job. Oan you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! I think this is gonna work. It's got to work. Attention, passengers, this is Oaptain Scott. We have a bit of bad weather in New York. It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay. Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it. I gotta get up there and talk to them. Be careful. Oan I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. Oaptain, I'm in a real situation. - What'd you say, Hal? - Nothing. Bee! Don't freak out! My entire species… What are you doing? - Wait a minute! I'm an attorney! - Who's an attorney? Don't move. Oh, Barry. Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? And please hurry! What happened here? There was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious! - Is that another bee joke? - No! No one's flying the plane! This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status? This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York. Where's the pilot? He's unconscious, and so is the copilot. Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? As a matter of fact, there is. - Who's that? - Barry Benson. From the honey trial?! Oh, great. Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee. It's got giant wings, huge engines. I can't fly a plane. - Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot? - Yes. How hard could it be? Wait, Barry! We're headed into some lightning. This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is developing. Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory… That's Barry! …is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew. Flowers?! We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience. Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane.

I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. They've done enough damage. But isn't he your only hope? Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. Their wings are too small… Haven't we heard this a million times? "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense." - Get this on the air! - Got it. - Stand by. - We're going live. The way we work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. But let me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big difference. More than we realized. To us, to everyone. That's why I want to get bees back to working together. That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O. We get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow! - Hello! Left, right, down, hover. - Hover? - Forget hover. This isn't so hard. Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Barry, what happened?! Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time. - That may have been helping me. - And now we're not! So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out! Move out! Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! Don't have to yell. I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble. It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! It's not a tone. I'm panicking! I can't do this! Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! You snap out of it. You snap out of it. - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - Hold it! - Why? Oome on, it's my turn. How is the plane flying? I don't know. Hello? Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? The Pollen Jocks! They do get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow. - Hello. All right, let's drop this tin can on the blacktop. Where? I can't see anything. Oan you? No, nothing. It's all cloudy. Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry. - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something. - What? - I don't know. It's strong, pulling me. Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. Bring the nose down. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - What in the world is on the tarmac?

Get some lights on that! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - Vanessa, aim for the flower. - OK. Out the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys? Affirmative! Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it. Land on that flower! Ready? Full reverse! Spin it around! - Not that flower! The other one! - Which one? - That flower. - I'm aiming at the flower! That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. Rotate around it. - This is insane, Barry! - This's the only way I know how to fly. Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! Just drop it. Be a part of it. Aim for the center! Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! Oome on, already. Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly! - Yes. No high-five! - Right. Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! - Thank you. - But we're not done yet. Listen, everyone! This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. That means this is our last chance. We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say? Are we going to be bees, orjust Museum of Natural History keychains? We're bees! Keychain! Then follow me! Except Keychain. Hold on, Barry. Here. You've earned this. Yeah! I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. Oh, yeah. That's our Barry. Mom! The bees are back! If anybody needs to make a call, now's the time. I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight! Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Oan I help who's next? Would you like some honey with that?

It is bee-approved. Don't forget these. Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see a nickel! Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! I had no idea. Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment? Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. Sorry I'm late. He's a lawyer too? I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. Have a great afternoon! Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere. No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. You're a lifesaver, Barry. Oan I help who's next? All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly. Thank you, Barry! That bee is living my life! Let it go, Kenny. - When will this nightmare end?! - Let it all go. - Beautiful day to fly. - Sure is. Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office. You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. - Thinking bee! - Me? Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Oan we stop here? I'm not making a major life decision during a production number! All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys. I had virtually no rehearsal for that.

[my-rose-tinted-glasses]

My memory is terrible so I wanted to do a breakdown of my stuff every once in a while. Might be monthly, might be whenever I feel like it. Also there are too many shows on and something is always finishing or starting so a month is a lot.

BL - Currently Watching

1000 Years Old [2/12] - It's silly, and entertaining and makes me laugh. The friend group is delightful and I'm having a good time watching them. Was excited for a minute when Yo suggested a haircut for Pun because I cannot handle that wig. 🤞

Anti Reset [5/10] - This is one of the most frustrating shows I've watched in a while. The show doesn't seem to settle on what is actually trying to say about the AI of it all, and when it says something I'm not crazy about it. Why is it so frustrating? Because they are so fucking endearing when they're together on screen. I wanna love this show so much.

Cherry Magic Th [11/12]– I love them so much. I'm fascinated by the choices that the show is making. As a big fan of the manga and the jbl I came into this with reservations and this show is just blowing my mind. This was the best episode 11 of all time and Tay/New are delivering. My heart is so full with this.

Cherry Magic Anime [7/12]– Another helicopter ride! Yay. The date song was hilarious. We're now getting to the point where they are dating and Adachi is feeling guilty for lying so I'm curious how the show will adapt the next phase of the relationship.

Dead Friend Forever [10/12]– Glad to see we are all on board with Tan's murderous impulses. It's been so much fun having more people join in on the fun. As for me, I NEED White to stay alive. That's really all I want. Getting curious about how Perth factors in to all of this.

My Strawberry Film[2/8] - I feel it coming. I see sadness in my future. But I'm bracing because I'm loving the look of this show. And pining boys are my favourite type of boys. I'm ready.

Ossan's Love Returns [8/9] - The videos messages destroyed me but then that ending made me annoyed. I don't know what to expect in terms of Kurosawa but I hope he's not actually dying and there's a really good reason for all this. Medical mal practice might be the thing. Although as @twig-tea pointed out to me, since it was said in show it might not actually happen. I want happy for the ending anyway.

Perfect Propose [5/6] . Why must I only have them for 6 episodes??? I need more. Kai is everything to me, and that back hug followed by that smile melted by cold heart. Hiro's boss needs something heavy to fall on him from a great height. And please Hiro,sweetie, I need you to eat better and sleep.

Although I Love You, and You? [7/10]- Sakae is letting me down. And by that I mean, the show is letting me down. Sakae needs to put his foot down with Mizuki and go back to being a fool in love with Soga.

To Be Continued [1/8] - It's not amazing. but I'm a sucker for second chance romance and there are two couples so there's a 50% chance I will like this. We'll see. Also, they need to start hiring younger actors for the high school flashbacks. This goes for A Secretly Love too. Having 27 year olds and up playing ten years younger just won't do. It's terrible.

Unknown [2/12] - I'm intrigued. Not completely sold yet but I'm liking it so far. Also nothing would keep me away from watching Sam Lin again.

Also watched the first episode of A Secretly Love and caught up with City of Stars but it's on the 'I need to shut of my brain' schedule so I'm not necessarily watching to weekly.

BL - Finished

Cooking Crush - I will miss all of them. I loved it so much. The whole cut/uncut version thing was annoying and the editing was weird at times but overall this was wonderful. Communication done right. Relationships and character growth was stellar and both couples won my heart. Aungpao really surprised me, considering he was surrounded my pros on all sides. Dynamite was a joy to watch. And OffGun delivering with all the kissing. Everyone should watch this.

The Sign - I mean, what they did to this show is absolutely insane. Not airing the finale like the rest of the show. Having to pay extra for happy ending is ridiculous (although I kinda predicted this and @lurkingshan is my witness. I said as a joke and it turns out reality is a joke.) Then waiting 2 whole weeks for whatever that was. Just the most unsatisfying experience. Go read this from Shan because I agree with everything said there. Also @bengiyo final thoughts here really echo how I felt about this show overall.

Happy Ending - 20 minutes split in 3. Why? No idea. Was it a happy ending? I think so. Was it cute? Sure. Was it great to watch Seong Hyuk again? You betcha. But I didn't love it. I need Choco Milk Shake S2, like, TODAY.

Playboyy - It ended.

Rose Watches OJBL - I feel bad about this. I didn't watch any of the ones I planned to. This might seem like whatever but I've been trying to catch up with awards season films, because since uni, me and a couple of friends always do it and finish it by watching the oscars together and so ojbl was were I dropped the ball. Gonna restart soon though.

Not BL - Watched this month

Night Has Come Death's Game Shop for Killers

That's it for right now. As usual my ask box is open for gif requests and any other questions. All my gifs are under #rosygifs.

Have a good week💜

[katsona-the-katsequel]

Specialized Extracurricular Execution Squad Activity Report

Part 9

12/18 (Fri) Reporter: Yukari Takeba

Well, this is Takeba. Today is already the fifth day of the exam. Toriumi-sensei, please stop asking questions based on random conversations that went off topic during class... Well, I remembered it for now. The one that doesn't have Portuguese origins is number 4, "saboru," right?

But isn't saboru a Japanese word?

12/19 (Sat) - Reporter: Mitsuru Kirijo

It's Kirijo. Yukari, "saboru" is derived from the English word "sabotage". It has been turned into Japanese, but since it was originally a foreign word, only "sabo" is written in katakana.

Well, the second semester final exams are over, and winter vacation is just around the corner. The day of the decision, New Year's Eve, is fast approaching, but before that, Christmas is also coming up.

…Well, I do feel that it may be a little inappropriate, but we have decided to spend the day as usual. Rather than being afraid of the terror of Nyx, I want everyone to enjoy themselves while they can. That's what I think.

12/20 (Sun) - Reporter: Fuuka Yamagishi

Good evening, this is Yamagishi. Following Kirijo-senpai's advice to "do things as usual," I decorated the reception counter with a Christmas tree today. Let's have some fun while we're here. ...I was just thinking, if we decorate the whole school, will Tartarus also look like it's Christmas?

12/21 (Mon) - Reporter: Akihiko Sanada

The exam results were announced today. Well, as I said in the lounge, you don't need to worry too much about the results of this exam. Let's clear our heads and prepare for the next step tomorrow. ...But should I mention Junpei's grades? They're still not great, but they're better than before. Well done.

12/22 (Tue) - Reporter: Junpei Iori

Hi, Junpei here.

Whoa! Sanada-san praised me! Hey, what should I do? What should I do?! I'm too flustered. You're so lucky, Sanada-san. I'm sure you'll be in high demand, and you'll have no shortage of girls to spend time with, but it's Christmas after all! And Sanada-san is just as natural as that, so even if he gets invited out, he won't even notice and just turn it down.

Ah, what a waste! Damn it, I'm not going to let Sanada-san get away with it! Anyway, if there's anyone among the beauties around you who's free, please introduce me to them.

12/23 (Wed) - Reporter: Yukari Takeba

Uh, this is Takeba.

Tomorrow is finally Christmas Eve. Do you all have any plans? I'm sure there won't be any parties in the dorms, right? Well, this year, everyone will have fun in their own way. But next year, let's all make plans and have a party together. Okay?

12/24 (Thu) - Reporter: Ken Amada

Today I stopped by Paulownia Mall on my way home from school, and it was completely Christmas-colored. Well, actually, white, red, and green are Christmas colors, so I guess it's the "Three Colors of Christmas". But it was really beautiful. The illuminations were shining all over the mall... Now that I think about it... I saw a guy with a hairstyle that looked like the leader there, but I wonder if it was him? But he was with a woman...

I guess it's better to say nothing, right? Oh well. It doesn't concern me.

Anyway, Merry Christmas.

But today is still the 24th, so it's Merry Christmas Eve.

12/25 (Fri) - Reporter: Fuuka Yamagishi

Good evening, this is Yamagishi.

Well, it's true that yesterday was Christmas Eve and today is Christmas, but Christmas Eve feels more exciting. I wonder why?

Anyway, Christmas is over, and winter vacation starts the day after tomorrow. And soon it's New Year's Eve. What should we decide?

12/26 (Sat) - Reporter: Mitsuru Kirijo

It's Kirijo.

As Yamagishi said, the day of the decision is near. However, everyone should already have their answer. Now it's up to the leader to decide.

By the way, yesterday and the day before yesterday, we received a report that there was a suspicious woman wearing a giant ribbon in front of the dorms... does anyone have any idea who she was?

12/27 (Sun) - Reporter: Junpei Iori

Hey there, it's Junpei!

The Ribbon Woman... Hmm, given the current situation, isn't she a Sanada fanatic or something?

More importantly, the winter holidays are just beginning! It's been cold lately, so everyone, be careful not to catch a cold. Oh, by the way, I'm thinking about getting a Kadomatsu decoration for the New Year...but where can I buy one?

12/28 (Mon) Reporter: Yukari Takeba

Uh, this is Takeba.

Junpei, what happened? Something's wrong.

Ah, you're a considerate person, aren't you? Well, being able to pay attention to your surroundings is the first step to becoming a good man. By the way, I think you can probably find Kadomatsu at a hardware store or something like that. So, this was Takeba, an expert on family matters.

12/29 (Tue) - Reporter: Akihiko Sanada

They say that talking about next year makes the devil laugh, but when it comes to you guys, the devil will die laughing. It seems like you've made up your mind. I'll leave the final decision to the leader, but please take our feelings into consideration. I'm counting on you.

Oh yeah, you should say hello to Mr. Kurosawa and the owner of Kosaido, who have helped you so much, by today or tomorrow.

12/30 (Wed) - Reporter: Aigis

I have returned. To this place again... Speaking with you all today, I feel like I have finally found the reason why I am here. I will no longer waver. Wherever you go, is where I go. And your enemy is... my enemy. Tomorrow is New Year's Eve. Make a decision you will not regret.

12/31 (Thu) - Reporter: Mitsuru Kirijo

This is Kirijo.

The Dark Hour just ended, and the date changed. It's already New Year's Day 2010. Happy New Year... Happy New Year. Hehe, the TV countdown will end, and it will be a few hours until the actual New Year... The Dark Hour really is troublesome. Right now, I am making this report with my memories of last year. In other words, that was the result of my decision.

Even though he was the incarnation of the hated Nyx, I'm relieved that I didn't have to kill that Mochizuki... Have I mellowed out, or is he special? Either way, I'll accept his last words at face value. I have to make this a good year...

1/1 (Fri) - Reporter: Junpei Iori

Happy New Year! I'm Junpei Iori! I'm broadcasting this in a louder voice than usual!

Oh, I'm glad. Kirijo-senpai, Yukari-chan, Aigis, and Fuuka all wear formal attire, which is a traditional Japanese beauty. And when they're not even wearing them, how can you not get excited? Well, I also went to Tartarus for the first time in this year. And I defeated my first shadow, found my first treasure chest, had my first rare item escape me, and was chased by my first Reaper. It's the same as always. Ah, but Tartarus' new area is a completely white space, so it feels a little different. Maybe this time we're close to the top?

1/2 (Sat) - Reporter: Ken Amada

The city has become a mess. It seems that a strange cult held a meeting on the night of New Year's Day... According to Junpei, the area in front of Iwatodai Station was covered in graffiti with flyers and strange markings, and it was a complete mess.

I think it's Nyx's influence, but maybe humans are more frightening...

<-PREVIOUS●NEXT->

Tag List: @kerto-p

[comfortlesshurt]

alrighty, I locked in for a couple days and now I get to reward myself by yelling into the tumblr void about the series progress

first off, there are TWO FICS over 50% done, v exciting stuff. I know they've been over 50% for a bit now, but like... let me have my motivation, okay? we are in the HARD PART of the project where it all looks overwhelming, so I'll take the wins I can

also tex fic is finished and through round 1 of editing. it still needs another major edit and i need to finish fic 1 to make sure no info conflicts between the two, but the serious work for that is done

there are a few more days left before NotNaNo, but even going in with today's word counts, focusing on fics 1 and 2 should put them pretty close to finished by the end of November unless I was super off with the word count estimate

also had a really good writing day yesterday!

ignore those date projections at the bottom because like... those assume either i write 3k every day or i write 3k twice a week and 1.2k the other 5 days, and I canNOT do that consistently. but that July 23rd date is realistic! that's me continuing to hit my average based on the past 106 days since starting this project, so there's a good chance I finish this project in a total of just over a year (in which case I will never shut up about writing 450k in a year, so watch out)

finally, fic 1 is a huge portion of that daily par number in the first row, so... unless I fall majorly away from the intended timeline, that required daily par will go down a LOT at the end of december, which will be nice. the goal is still to focus a lot on this project and only really jump over to side projects as they call to me, but it's easier to do that when your average isn't struggling to keep up with your daily par number. it simply does not feel good to be constantly working just to barely get over the par.

as far as editing, i'm starting to fear i didn't budget enough time for that in my early projections, so the timeline might be off there. those due dates listed are for the final rough draft, which doesn't get a chance to rest before immediately going into a month of editing. something just tells me now that a month isn't going to be enough to cover a content edit for each fic. it's also relying on the technical edits being done week-to-week as each chapter goes up.

also added one more tracking tool recently:

this is to look at all the projects week-to-week, and really what it's done is made it obvious that I am in fact very focused on fic 1 lmao. in my defense, that's the one that has consistently had the highest required par, so it's easy to treat it as the most important. also, up to 27-aug is rough. I started writing these fics in Word, so I didn't have day-to-day stats to go back and check. I could only find those once I switched to Reedsy, so for the record I did not write 54k between 20-aug and 27-aug. same with the tex fic--that wasn't all written in one week.

this chart still only looks at ILaD progress, so you can see where I take my break in October and it cuts down a lot... but that's excluding the 10k that went into an unrelated fic, so I don't think taking this break has actually cut down on my writing much. it's just made me have a better time with it temporarily. i took a couple days off writing completely during October but like... I didn't really enjoy that? so I don't think that's the solution I'm looking for long-term.

anyway, thanks for coming to my ted talk. i will infodump again, and probably soon since all the end of the month posts are coming up in the next week.

[massivedrickhead]

Bechloe Week Day 1: Reunion

Words: 1104

Notes: Well I tried to start Bechloe week with something flirty and fun but naturally I can't help myself and it ended up getting a bit deeper than that. I also think this is a bit of a stretch for a "reunion" prompt...

I'm probably going to be doing 3 of the prompts for this week, but maybe more if I can get time to write them

Read on AO3

-

“Bec?” Chloe said, wrapping on the door of Beca’s office, one hand absentmindedly rubbing against her stomach. “This is your 30-minute warning, okay? The Bellas are going to be here in an hour.”

“So shouldn’t I get a 60-minute warning?” Beca replied. “They’ll be late anyway.”

“They won’t be late, Aubrey is in charge,” Chloe said, pushing the door open and stepping into her wife’s office. “And you need a 30-minute warning because you’re not greeting our friends - who we haven’t seen in over a year - in your office sweatpants.”

Beca frowned and spun around in her chair. “You love my office sweatpants.”

Chloe cocked her head. “Is that something you imagined I said?”

“I guess I just assumed, since every time I wear them you always want to grab my butt.”

“I think that’s more about your butt than the sweatpants, babe,” Chloe said. “But whether I love the sweats or not, you still need to change.”

“Fine,” Beca said, taking Chloe’s hands and tugging her into her lap. “Well, I don’t need to do any more work, so what should we do with our extra 30 minutes?”

Chloe checked her watch. “It’s more like 27 minutes now.”

“27 minutes? That doesn’t really seem like enough time,” Beca said. 

“Well, we could have a little longer if we saved time by showering together,” Chloe said.

“Mrs Mitchell-Beale, I like the way you think.”

Chloe climbed off Beca’s lap and tugged her out of the chair.

“Make the most of this,” Chloe said, pulling her towards the bathroom. “Once the Bellas get here we have to behave for a full week.”

Beca groaned. “Remind me why we have that rule in place again? It seems cruel and unnecessary. It’s not like they don’t know we’re married. They were there. They even saw us kiss.”

“And they still haven’t forgiven us for that time Emily walked in on us in the laundry room,” Chloe said. “Poor girl nearly went blind.”

“In our defence, she didn’t knock first,” Beca replied.

“In her defence, who knocks on the door of a laundry room before they enter?”

“Okay,” Beca said, “fair point.”

They made short work of stripping out of their clothes and were soon stepping into the shower together. As it so often did, Beca’s hand found its way to Chloe’s stomach.

“You’re still sure you want to tell them?” Beca asked.

“Yes,” Chloe said. “When is the next time we will all be together again after this? I want to tell them in person.”

“I know,” Beca said. “I do too.”

“Then why does your face look like that?”

“Genetics?”

“Smart-ass,” Chloe said, rolling her eyes. She put a finger under Beca’s chin and tilted her head up so she would look at her, and not her bump. “Why do you look worried? This is good news.”

“It’s the best news,” Beca said. “It’s just… as soon as we tell them, it stops being our little secret. It… I can’t explain it.”

“You’re scared we’re jinxing it,” Chloe said. Beca’s eyes dropped to Chloe’s stomach again, and Chloe knew she was right. “This isn’t like last time.”

“I know that,” Beca said. “Logically, I know that.”

Chloe pressed a kiss on Beca’s cheek and then pulled her into her arms, and they stayed like that for a little while. The hot water cascaded on and around them, steam rising up to obscure the rest of their bathroom.

Feeling hidden away and protected, Beca spoke again. “Announcing him to our friends, celebrating him, it feels like we’re drawing attention to him. Like we’re asking for something bad to happen. The more excited I get to meet him, the more convinced I am that something is going to take him away.”

“Baby,” Chloe said, softly, holding Beca tighter. 

“I know I’m being stupid-”

“-You aren’t being stupid,” Chloe said, cutting her off. 

“I know it isn’t logical,” Beca said as if there’d been no interruption. “But then the more I try to convince myself that it isn’t going to happen, the more I feel like it will. If you tell yourself over and over again that everything’s fine, that everything will be fine, then the more likely it is that the universe will want to screw you over.”

Beca’s thoughts were spiralling now, she was working herself into a panic. She took a slightly shuddering breath and opened her mouth, as if to continue before something tapped her on the palm of her hand.

She froze. 

During their hug, her hand reached Chloe’s stomach again. One hand was pressed against Chloe’s back, the other resting protectively on the side of her stomach.

She had felt her son kick for the first time.

They hadn’t made it this far last time.

Beca let out a shocked laugh and tears sprang to her eyes before quickly joining the shower water spilling down her cheeks.

“He can hear you,” Chloe said, smiling as tears filled her eyes too. “He’s letting you know that he’s okay.”

Beca laughed again and bent down to press a kiss against Chloe’s stomach.

“Hi buddy,” Beca said. “I can’t wait to meet you.”

“We don’t have to tell the Bellas,” Chloe said. “I can wear my big sweaters.”

“In L.A. in July?” Beca said, straightening back up, an eyebrow raised.

“I’m always cold, they’ll believe it,” Chloe said. 

“We should tell them,” Beca said. “They’re our family.”

Chloe smiled. “Good, because they would never have believed the sweater thing.”

Beca laughed and kissed her wife again. “I’m sorry I dumped all that on you. I didn’t mean to, it just came out.”

“Don’t apologise,” Chloe said. “Have you talked to your therapist about it?”

“Yeah, we’re working on it,” Beca said. “I know it’s just my anxiety working overtime. My dumb brain doesn’t like it when I’m happy, apparently.”

“Not dumb,” Chloe corrected. “Just… misguided? It thinks it’s protecting you. It thinks it’s keeping you safe.”

“Po-tay-to, po-tah-to,” Beca said. “I’m sorry I ruined the mood. I was planning on doing my best sex moves and everything.”

“I suppose when everyone’s safe in bed tonight, we could try again,” Chloe said, with a hint of a smirk. “Our door does lock, after all.”

“Do you think you can be quiet enough for that?” Beca asked, grinning as she pulled Chloe in for a kiss.

Chloe pulled away. “We don’t have time right now. I don’t even know what time it is, we’ve been in here for-”

Ding-dong!

“Crap,” Chloe said.

“So greeting them soaking wet and naked is better than my work sweats, how exactly?”

[jmdbjk]

This is literally my brain when it starts overanalyzing:

Anyone else like that? My brain won't stop thinking about Jikook in February-March. It has decided to go into overdrive on the Jikook chronology of those two months and the only way to appease it is to obsessively obsess.

Let's review: back when Cedric Murac of Calvin Klein posted on his Instagram story that he was on his way to Seoul on January 29, we all got excited, and then what?... crickets.... Then we had the audacity to be angry at Calvin Klein for using Army for clout hahahahahaha. We didn't know!! Who turned out to be the clowns? We were skeptical up until the first images dropped of Kookie's bare abs.

We have no idea exactly when the CK ads were photographed but the one big clue we have is JK's hair. Jungkook emerged from deep hibernation at the beginning of February. His hair was long, long on Feb. 3 and a week later on Feb. 11, he had bangs and it had a lot of waves in it when he was working out at Coach Tommy's gym. Much like the way his hair looks in the CK photos.

We saw JK on Feb. 27 and his hair was long in the back.

Not relevant but, in a way, also relevant: on February 28, Jungkook deletes his Instagram account. We are shooketh. At that moment I thought for sure there will be no ambassadorships for him, the whole point of having a large social media following is to harness those followers and turn them into cash money.

Ok back to the task at hand: We saw both Jimin and Jungkook on March 3 and JK's hair still looked long in the back. By March 14, JK had cut some of the length off the back.

My brain also wondering: when did JK's visit to Jimin's rehearsal happen? between Feb. 3 and March 13 when Jimin left Seoul to go to NYC to tape the Jimmy Fallon show? Or that week AFTER when he was rehearsing for the Korean television music shows? That would have been the week of March 20-27? The car live where he told JK it was ok that he didn't come to one of the pre-recordings was on March 28.

[Regardless, that's a quick turnaround for a Bangtan Bomb.]

My brain on a tangent: what is JK doing there at work to begin with? During this Bangtan Bomb he was already decked out in a CK ball cap and CK denims and not dressed for a workout or rehearsal. Who knows, maybe he was there for his own meetings, fittings, reviewing photos, or other activity. Yelling at my brain to FOCUS on the topics already being discussed!

March 15, Jungkook posts his ramen recipe on Weverse and he and Jimin proceed to have a back and forth convo with Jimin who says he needs to head to JK's house when he gets back to Korea.

March 19, Jimin returns to Seoul from New York after his Tonight Show filming and his feature video for Vogue magazine.

Mar. 23 at 3:06 a.m. Jungkook wants a midnight tuna/chicken goulash snack.

The next night, Mar. 24 at 12:58 a.m., Jimin does a Weverse live in the car on the way home following Music Bank taping.

On Mar. 26 at 9:39 p.m., Jimin does another live in the car following MCountdown taping.

On Mar. 27 at 2:53 a.m., Jungkook sits down with us to watch Suchwita with Jimin, a Jimin MV, a fan-made Jimin compilation video and more Jimin, Jimin, Jimin.

The Calvin Klein campaign dropped on March 28 at 6:30 a.m. after being teased 24 hours prior. That would have been 8:30 p.m. KST.

Mar. 28 Jimin starts a live at 6:00 p.m. in the car (heading east by the way... my brain geez) after Inkigayo recording and Jungkook jumps in the comments. He had seen Jungkook's Calvin Klein teaser images by then.

Confused yet?

Me? I'm a visual person so I had to do this to see how it all played out:

On April 3 at 3:30 a.m., Jimin comes on live to receive our love over his history making #1 BBHot100 achievement.

Jimin is still working. He is not sitting at home. There is something in the works, we just don't know what yet.

Jungkook is probably about to be on his way home because we suspect Hobi's induction day is this week [sobs]. Time rolls on and waits for no one.

ANYWAY!

I hope you were entertained. We still don't know when that Calvin Klein photoshoot was or when JK visited Jimin's rehearsal, but now you have a visual calendar where you can see the possibilities.

You're welcome. [finally slams that door in my brain.]

[i-prefer-base-twelve]

Hello ! Could I ask for a oneshot (or headcanons if you like) of Dipper x A reader who was pressured too much by parents with school grades? My whole life I've been pressured, and I must say, it's not good, you end up doing the things that others want without thinking about you first, mostly you do it out of fear of suffering consequences... But I'm getting better ! If you can be inspired by this little description I would love it ! — Anon Simp

Hi sorry it has taken me literally forever to get to this. It's been a long time since I've had to worry about grades, so I hope this still rings true, but I think it might go something like this--

You and Dipper start talking because of DD&D, of course--he noticed your pin and couldn't help but strike up a conversation. You've never actually played yourself, but you've read all the rulebooks and you watch a lot of videos and--

"You should play with us!" He cuts you off in his excitement. You immediately agree. But as the day draws closer, you realize you can't, there's no way, you've got too much studying to do. You text him your regrets, and you can tell he's disappointed, and you agree to try again next week.

Of course, the next week, you still have homework.

Just like the week after that.

But a funny thing has happened over the past three weeks; you and Dipper have started texting each other, not just about rpgs, but about, you know, life. And as you stress-text at him again and again, he starts to put the pieces together.

One day he says, "You're really hard on yourself."

It strikes you as absurd. "Well, yeah. I have to be."

He frowns. "Why?"

"Because--" is he being deliberately obtuse? Isn't it the most obvious thing in the world?-- "Because if I don't get straight As, my parents will kick me out, I'll never get into college, I'll never get a degree, I'll never get a job that pays more than minimum wage, I'll die alone and homeless at 27!--"

He watches you with concern as you catastrophize. Then he says, "You know, my uncle Stan never even graduated from high school. He lived out of his car for ten years. But even he ended up ok." He smiles to himself; he clearly loves this uncle. "And anyway, you're smart. I bet if you don't study for this test, you'll get like a 92 instead of a 98. That's still an A."

You shake your head miserably. "Not good enough for my parents."

He nods sadly, then says, "Listen, I get it, I used to be really anxious too. About, like, everything. But last summer I kinda had a... near-death experience."

He what? You stare at him in horror, but he doesn't elaborate, just goes on, "And it really put things in perspective, y'know? A bad grade isn't the end of the world."

Something about the look in his eyes as he says that, the sudden flatness in his voice, makes you shiver. What happened to him?... you hope he's in therapy.

He meets your eyes again. "I know it feels like it, though."

You swallow. His eyes are big and serious and looking right at you. "Maybe..." you say, voice wobbly, "Maybe we should start smaller. I can't take a whole Saturday off to play games, but maybe... maybe if we, got a coffee or something? I can tell my parents we're studying."

Dipper breaks out into a huge grin, and you feel like you might float away. "See? I told you you were smart!"

[l-norris]

It's race time in Italy! After a very tight Qualifying on Saturday we for sure can be excited for a mindboggling race, right?

DISCLAIMER: Remember that this is just for shits and giggles, I'm not trying to actually hate on any of the drivers cuz all (most) of them are very dear to me!

As always - numbers in brackets = lap numbers

- Formation lappp

- McLaren don't embarrass me I'm begging

- Both Red Bulls on Hards

- Help. Me.

- Nervous. Nervous. Nervous. Nervous.

- Formation lap complete.

- Guanyu taking an eternity to line up

- It's lights out and away we go!

- Amazing start from Lando

- Bottler no more

- We actually made it past turn 1!

- But yeah. Uh. Oscar and Charles bailed.

- What the hell happened here😭

- Heartbreak is one thing

- My ego another

- I beg you don't embarrass me motherfucker

- George went off in lap 1 and has damaged his front wing

- And refuses to box for it

- Daniel squeezes past Nico and almost makes him crash

- Nico pits (6)

- Yuki retires (8)

- This race is developing to be an absolute shitshow already

- Danny Ric 5-second-time-penalty (10)

- Nico 10-second-time-penalty (10)

- Crofty blasting Yuki's track record in Monza

- Leave the lil' guy alone Crofty

- George still hasn't pitted.

- Just as I'm writing this he's coming in LOL (12)

- Fernando pits (13)

- Lando in Charles' DRS (14)

- 👀👀👀

- Lando pits (15)

- Charles pits (16)

- Undercut time

- Oscar pits (17)

- Effectively still in front of Lando

- Charles complaining about his pitstop (17)

- Lando is stuck behind Alex

- AM I HEARING TEAMORDERS??? (18)

- ... Close enough, welcome back Hungarian GP 2024.

- This blog is now a McLaren F1 Team hater

- Actually taking the piss McLaren

- Kevin playing bumpercars with Pierre (22)

- "Papayarules" Mhm. Yup.

- Lando being told he's allowed to race Oscar (24)

- What are McLaren cooking

- 10-second-time-penalty for Kevin (26)

- Race ban when?

- Refilling my jug because I sweated all of it out in the span of this race so far (27)

- Danny Ric is out for blood today

- Lando fastest lap (29)

- Oscar fastest lap (30)

- I think Zandvoort was just a one-off strategy wise

- "He gives me the position and then he races me?"

- Yeah, that's how F1 works Checo (32)

- Lando pits (33)

- "Just in case Ferrari tries to do something clever"

- HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

- Checo pits (36)

- This race can't get any more chaotic tbh

- McLaren asking Oscar if they could do a One-Stop??

- Absolutely not lmfao

- Should've extended the stint or something idk I'm not a strategist

- George is also out for blood

- Oscar pits (39)

- Lando and Max are racing

- Help me

- Lando overtakes Max (41)

- Max pits (42)

- Oscar gets really close to Carlos (45)

- And he does it!

- Oscar is up in P2

- If we can't have the 1-2 give me a McLaren double podium at least🥲

- Lando passes Carlos (48)

- Max complains (49)

- 3 laps to go

- Charles is still first

- Mixed feelings tbh

- Last lap starts

- Il Predestinato is still first

- HE WINS IN MONZA (AGAIN)

- "Just in case Ferrari tries to do something clever"

- HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *end quote*

- ... yeah.🤐

- We're gonna hear the Italian anthem a second time today

- "Could McLaren have one-stopped?" "Yeah."

- "Should they have one-stopped?"

- YES! FUCKING YES THEY SHOULD'VE!!!!

- sorry - temperament

- Sidenote: Kmag raceban in Baku

- Rip bro you will be missed

- Step aside Kmag Ollie will take over the wheel now.

- Another sidenote: Franco finished his debut race in P12! Good on him. Good on him.

- Another another sidenote: Alex finished in the points! Yay Albpoints!

- Feel free to add on!

... Yeah.

The emotions I was feeling during this race were heavily mixed, like it took me a little to finally feel happy for Charles lol.

Don't get me wrong, I'm happy he finally won again, but McLaren with their shit strategy calls just... take the wind out of everything, I guess. It's hard being a McLaren AND Ferrari fan🥹

Anyways, see y'all in Baku!

[putschki1969]

2024/02/27 Blog post by Wakana 気温差に振り回される毎日〜閏年のおかげで締切が１日増えてます〜

❗This is Fan Club EXCLUSIVE content❗ ❗PERSONAL USE ONLY❗ ❗Do NOT SHARE on other sites❗ ❗Join her FAN CLUB! Check out my detailed TUTORIAL ❗

Constantly At The Mercy Of Temperature Changes〜Deadline Extended Thanks To The Leap Year〜

Lately, there have been extremely hot days, and then all of a sudden, the temperatures are dropping again so I often find myself being dressed inappropriately when I go out. Yesterday for example, I was wearing clothes that weren't suitable for the weather😇Flimsy pants made of thin material without tights underneath and just a thin, short down jacket😂My legs were freezing😂 Why did I choose a short jacket? I kept blaming myself all day as I was struggling not to be blown away by the strong wind😇 Well, I somehow survived yesterday, so today I made sure not to make the same mistake again. I wore a thick long wool coat, tights underneath my pants and a huge muffler wrapped around my neck. Best choice, it was perfect ＼＼\\٩( 'ω' )و //／／ I didn't feel the cold at all! ! I was so happy that I ate yakiniku for lunch all by myself at my favourite small restaurant. (I should have taken some pictures😅)

Anyway, today it was even colder than yesterday in Tokyo, also, it was extremely windy😱 There were a lot of things lying on the main street that had been blown around by the wind... I wondered what it was. When I looked closely, I noticed that it was garbage bags which had been blown around😱There was even one garbage bag lying around in the middle of the road 💦 The wind is way stronger than expected...

Hello, this is Wakana (0￣▽￣0)／

Are you also worried about what to wear this spring season? ? It's really difficult 😓

Well, I know it's a little late but I am finally dine with my gifts for those whose messages I read during this month's "Talk Garden"! ! This month's theme was Valentine's Day so of course I had to choose cards with hearts on them ♡ All of them are cute and I love them! 😍 This month's Shark-chan is chocolate coloured and sparkly✨🦈 I also tried adding a heart but I wasn't used to drawing them so the lines turned out kinda blurry😂Sorry😂 Please wait a little while longer until my love letter gets delivered to you~♡ ~･:*+.\(( °ω° ))/.:+ [OMG, so excited to receive my love letter from Wakana. She chose two cards with German on it, how cute! I guess I will be getting the one with all the different stamps featuring little angels]

Speaking of which!!. . . . Everyone 😊 I think you all know what I am about to say😊

The next talk theme is "Graduation Memories"♡ Certainly you would have some memories, right? ♡ I am sure you just forgot to send your messages, right? ♡ Once again, I have barely received any submissions! 🤣🤣Please everyone, do your best ! 😂 Think of something! *laughs* Be sure to submit your stories! ! 😂 I'm eagerly awaiting all of your messages😂

On a more or less related side-note, I've recently been thinking a lot about wanting to "graduate"! ! The truth is, I want to graduate from my super unhealthy habit of using my smartphone before sleeping🥺📱It's really bad for me 😭 In my case, it's not a matter of my sleep becoming too light, but rather that I fall asleep later and later.😭 After getting ready and heading into bed, it's best to turn off the lights and focus on falling asleep. That way I can get in a lot more hours of sleep! I am aware of all of that but still...it's tough... So that's why I would really like to move past this bad habit! ! 🥺💐

Anyway, please send me all of your stories related to graduation! ! ＼＼\\٩( 'ω' )و //／／ The deadline is the 29th since this is a leap year!

Well then, that’s it for today! Until next time~ ☆( *'▽'*)/

＊＊＊Wakana＊＊＊

[universitypenguin]

Hey beautiful! How are you? How is the writing? I am missing Lloyd and princess so much to the point where I am going to have to reread their fic🫣will they be making a return in the near future? No pressure, just asking because I genuinely love those two.

Hey! Thanks so much for reaching out, it means a lot to know people still care about my writing - especially since I haven’t been very productive as of late. I know there’s lots of other talented fanfic authors out there for you to enjoy. 💛

I've been hanging in there, thank you for asking. Things have been pretty hectic lately for me. I’ve been working on chapter 27 off and on for the past two months and kept getting discouraged when it wasn’t turning out how I envisioned. Then, at the beginning of April, I got a job offer. It was very exciting and I accepted it immediately - however the process of starting that new job was ended up being very time consuming. The job itself is actually pretty easy, especially compared to what I used to do, which is great news for me!

Also, in the middle of job searching this winter/spring, I accidentally let one of my major professional certifications expire. (A word of advice: do NOT do this, it sucks. 😑)

Unfortunately it’s not a license I’ve actively worked under for the past two years, so I wasn’t eligible to just throw in some education hours and appeal the expiration. Because I hadn’t used my license recently, I had to take a semester long college course and re-test with the state and pass their in person practicals before they’d let me apply to get my license back. Basically they made me start over from almost zero. I was not thrilled.

That class is just now wrapping up. I still have to do the final exam, take my state licensing exam, pass the state practicals, and then I’ll be allowed to apply for a new license. It’s been a lot. Learn from my mistakes: don’t let your certifications expire. Those test are all coming up in the next two weeks.

Anyways, back to the point.

TPATL definitely took a hit during all this chaos, especially around midterms when everything began to pile up and the job change started to take shape. I kept promising myself I'd dive back into it, but life just kept throwing curveballs – like a last-minute job interview I had to rush off to, classes that got busy, etc.

But hey, I've finally managed to tackle Chapter 27. I admit, it wasn't pretty at first. The whole thing just felt flat, lacking any spark to keep readers engaged. It took me a while to pinpoint what was missing, but in the past few days, I've been able to breathe some life back into it. Right now I’m working on the last two scenes from Lloyd’s perspective and I have a couple more scenes to write from Princess’ POV.

I’m hoping to finish the chapter by the end of the week. Friday, perhaps?

Honestly, sometimes I wish someone would just chain me to my desk and force me to write! But I'm determined to get back on track, especially knowing there are readers like you who care about Lloyd and Princess's journey. So, thank you for your patience and understanding – it means the world to me. Hang tight, I promise TPATL will be back on track soon!