#anyways jakes smile in the last gif makes me wish i was dead

[jaakey]

he 💕

[highwaytothedangerzone502]

Ghost Story - Chapter 13

Pairing: Rooster x Female OC

Word Count: 3294

Warnings: Strong language

Summary: No one will miss a ghost. It'd been a running joke for as long as anyone could remember, something Ghost herself started, and she always said it with a smile on her face or with mirth in her voice. The untouchable stealth pilot in every sense of the word, no one could've predicted the depth of her turmoil over recent events, nor the extremes she would go to in order to protect the man she loved, not even those closest to her. Now, all that was left of the young aviator for Maverick, Hangman, and Rooster were the memories of the past, which would slowly fade with time. She'd come into their lives and made an unforgettable impression, and then, like a ghost, she was gone... Then again, ghosts can't die a second time.

Notes: The chapters/parts in italics are flashbacks. Also, I know I used Melissa Benoist as Juliette in India Lima Yankee but I really love her as an actress okay...

Chapter Songs: Like I Loved You How Not To

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Ghost

Oooh, I fucked up. Ghost thought when she cracked her eyes open and saw Hangman passed out in bed next to her, fully unclothed. The activities from last night flooded her mind, and as enjoyable as it had been, Ghost still regretted it. She didn't want Hangman to get the wrong idea, even if they had agreed beforehand the night would mean nothing other than the breakup sex they never had after the second time they separated.

With a splitting headache and no wish but to hit the pillow again, Ghost quietly got out of bed and stepped into the shower, anxious to get rid of the bar and beer smell lingering on her skin and hair. She held no concerns about waking Hangman in the process. Like her, once asleep, he remained dead to the world. On more than one occasion, they'd both slept through tornado sirens, only to be woken by their frantic parents scrambling to get them out of bed. Things didn't change, and by the time Ghost had finished her shower, dried her hair, and put on enough makeup to hide the bags under her eyes, Hangman still hadn't woken. Tossing her Top Gun hat on and putting in earbuds, she slipped out of her apartment, hoping the brisk morning air would clear her headache and her head.

Ghost selected walking over jogging, her stomach just rough enough after all the drinking last night that she didn't want to overdo it. Instead, she listened to a mixture of calming soundtracks, a favorite music genre of hers, and quiet enough that it didn't add to her pounding headache.

Ghost hadn't drunk that much in years, and her body reminded her that she was no longer in her twenties. She wasn't one to drink to forget, but the image of Rooster and Bryn making out burned itself into her mind, and Ghost turned to alcohol and Hangman.

I'm such a dumbass. What good is sleeping with Jake going to do other than a temporary distraction and a morning of regret, no matter how good it was? God, I shouldn't have done it. Drunk or not, I knew better, but I did it anyway because I had my heart hurt. I'm better than that, and Jake deserves better than that too. I've got to get a grip on myself. Since when has a guy ever made me this stupid? What have I let Rooster do to me? What have I-

Ghost would've crashed headfirst into a muscular chest had the person not grabbed her shoulder. Startled, she looked up, and of all people that could've blocked her way, it had to be them.

"Rooster! Bryn!" Ghost exclaimed, taking out her earbuds. "What are you two doing here?"

"Hey!" Bryn replied cheerfully, exhaustion well-disguised by still visible dark circles under her makeup. Rooster had his arms around her shoulders. "We thought we'd go for a walk, wake ourselves up after the copious amounts of alcohol we drank last night. I have an appointment in a bit, and it's just down this road, so I'll probably walk there from here. We saw you and were calling out your name, but I don't think you heard us over your music."

"Oh, yeah, I was engrossed in it. Side effect of the hangover, too, probably," Ghost lied. It was a better option than telling them she was thinking things over because that would make the couple prod, the last thing Ghost wanted them doing. Of course, judging by the crinkle in Rooster's brow, he already understood she had a racing mind.

"Yeah, I haven't seen you that drunk in a while, and then you disappeared with Hangman after midnight-"

Ghost cringed, wishing more than anything to disappear from that line of conversation. "The one time I didn't want to be seen, and I am."

"You two were hard to miss," Bryn said with a laugh. "If it makes you feel better, only Rooster and I noticed."

"I guess that's a little solace. I-" Ghost's phone blared 'Slow Ride,' giving her a welcome interruption. Recognizing the ringtone, she said, "I gotta take this. I'll see y'all later!"

Waving goodbye, Ghost turned around and headed back toward her apartment, grateful to escape the couple and for the perfect timing of the call. "Hey, what's up?"

"I wanted to check on you since I couldn't find you in the apartment, that's all," Hangman said groggily. "You okay?"

"Yeah, I was getting restless and went for a walk. How are you feeling?"

"I'll never admit this to anyone but you, but like shit. I'm going to catch a ride back to my apartment. Are you good to get home safely, or do you want me to wait for you?"

"No, you can go. It's busy out, and I have Ghost on me," she said, gripping the dagger Maverick gave her in her pocket, comforted by its constant presence. "Between me and the knife, I'll be fine."

Hangman chuckled. "All right. Text me when you get home, though, so I know. Love you, Annalise."

"I will," she promised, smiling to herself. Despite having broken up with each other, their friendship endured, and they did love each other with a passion, but it now was only platonically. There wasn't much, if anything, Ghost wouldn't do for Hangman. "Love you, Jake."

Hanging up, Ghost shoved her hands in her pockets, set on getting back to her apartment to eat and crash in her bed to sleep off the rest of her hangover when Rooster's voice sounded beside her. "Mind if I join you?"

"Oh, shit!" Ghost jumped, not having expected him. Glaring disapprovingly at him, she said, "Jesus, Rooster. Are you trying to kill me?"

"I thought nothing could surprise a ghost?" he teased, bumping her elbow with his.

"Must be an undiscovered seventh sense. Shouldn't you be walking Bryn to her appointment?"

"She decided to catch an Uber because it was later than she thought, and she was worried she'd be late. So I thought I'd catch up with you. Feel like we've barely hung out since I started dating Bryn."

"It's time-consuming having a girlfriend," Ghost remarked drolly, trying to hide any sign of her discomfort being around him, especially when all she could think about was how much she still loved him and how she hated herself for not telling him to cancel his first date with her 'friend' the night before. Ghost had had her chance, and she blew it. She had to live with the consequences, and it wasn't right to take it out on Rooster, even if her heartstrings pulled painfully at the mere sight of him.

"She's not my girlfriend yet," Rooster said, rubbing the back of his neck.

Ghost raised an eyebrow at him. "Does she know that? Because you kind of announced to everyone last night that you two were together."

"We're dating exclusively, but I'm not sure I want a label yet. I don't want to move too fast with this."

"How come?"

"I want the honeymoon phase to pass, to see how we really are around each other when the novelty of first being with each other fades away. Speaking of being together, are you and Hangman back together?"

"No," Ghost said firmly. 

"So the hookup last night-"

"The breakup sex that never happened the second time around," she said with a grimace. One of the last topics she wanted to talk to Rooster about was her sex life with Hangman.

"Does he know it was just that?"

"Yeah, he does. I made sure he does."

The two fell silent, but an unusual and unwelcome awkwardness settled over them. Ghost wanted to break it but had no clue how. Rooster, however, took it into his own hands. "Hey, are we okay?"

"Yeah, of course," Ghost answered, her hand tightening nervously around her pocketknife. "Why wouldn't we be?"

"Because you've been avoiding me since I started dating Bryn," he pointed out softly yet matter-of-factly. "At first, I thought it was because you were still settling in. I know you hate clutter, and the boxes stacked in your apartment undoubtedly drove you nuts. But when you got it all unpacked, you still avoided me. For better or worse, I know you Ghost. I know when you're avoiding me. I just want to know what's going on."

Ghost groaned internally. Why couldn't he have brought this up in private? "It's- it's nothing you did. At the risk of sounding cliche, it's me, not you."

"Oh, so it's most definitely me," Rooster joked lightly.

"No, no, it's really not anything you've done. It's my own issues. Don't worry about it."

"I am going to worry about it when you're pushing me away because of whatever it is. Talk to me, Ghost."

"I don't even know how to bring it up. I've always been shit at talking about my feelings, anyway. I'd rather deal with it on my own than drag other people down, too."

"Speaking from experience, it's not healthy to do that."

"Don't worry, I'm not going to go in a death spiral toward the ground with my captain because of it," Ghost said, shooting Rooster a sly smile.

"Mav told you about that?"

"Hangman, actually. He told me about the training and all that happened."

"Got it, got it... while I do trust you not to go in a death spiral, break the hard deck and commit insubordination in the process, I'm still not going to drop the subject."

"Can we at least talk about it in private at my apartment?"

"Of course," Rooster said instantly. The two once more fell silent, only a few bits of conversation popping up between them that never lasted long. By the time they reached her apartment, Ghost regretted her request to talk to him in private. She should've put her foot down and told him she didn't want to talk about it, but Rooster had always had a way of convincing her to do things she shouldn't. This would probably be one of those times.

Entering her apartment, she headed to the kitchen and asked, "Want anything to eat?"

"Sure, if it's not too much trouble," Rooster responded, leaning against the counter next to her and too close for comfort. "What's on the menu? Anything I can do to help?"

"PB and J, so it's super difficult and time-consuming."

Rooster clutched his heart. "I'm honored you would treat me to such a great meal."

Giving him a genuine grin, Ghost got out the ingredients, purposefully not starting the line of conversation Rooster so desperately wanted to discuss in hopes he'd forget or chicken out about it, but he annoyingly didn't.

"All right, we're in the privacy of your apartment. So, talk to me, Ghost. What's on your mind?"

She groaned. "Oh, I was hoping you'd forgotten about that."

"Nope."

"Fine, fine... I-I don't know. There are a few things, but mostly I feel guilty."

"Guilty? About what?"

"For sleeping with you the night before your first date with Bryn, for one thing. I may not have known it was her, but I still knew it was a friend, and I still slept with you."

Rooster looked at her curiously. "You know, that's the first time I've ever heard you acknowledge we slept together."

Ghost kept her eyes on the food in front of her, unwilling and unable to meet his gaze. She ignored his comment and continued, "I lied to Bryn as well. I told her nothing happened between us, and while that's true romantically, we still slept together, and more than once and recently, and while I kept it from her so she wouldn't think I was like that other bitch of a friend who slept with Bryn's boyfriend at the time, I worry if Bryn finds out, she'll think I lied for a different reason."

"Did you?"

Ghost didn't respond at first, trying to formulate an answer that wouldn't cause her to admit her feelings for him because it wasn't like she could ever act on them now that he had dated Bryn. Unfortunately, her moral code wouldn't allow her to.

Rooster refused to let up. "Ghost, is there another reason you lied to her?"

"Yes, but there's no point in bringing it up."

"Why not?"

"Because nothing will come of it. You dated her, and I don't date my friend's exes, no matter how long they dated and-"

"You like me?" Rooster interrupted, his brown eyes flashing with surprise.

"You think I slept with you for the hell of it?" Ghost countered, slightly irked, although she had no reason to be. "I don't sleep with any guy I find attractive."

"No, that's not- why did you never tell me?"

"You hated me for a while, and as much as you got on my nerves, I still liked you. Then by the time we got on good terms, I was dating Hangman. The first time you and I slept together was after I broke up with him, and I didn't want you to be rebound, so I said nothing. The second time, I was deploying the next day and didn't want to start something for one day and then be separated for months. The third-"

"We had an entire summer," Rooster pointed out, bristling. She heard the anger tinging his voice. "Why wait until the last minute to sleep with me?"

"I got scared. The last time I fell hard for a guy, he broke up with me, and it damn near broke my friendship with him. I didn't want that happening between us."

"And what about the third time? You knew I was going on a date with one of your friends, but you still slept with me. Why?"

Ghost's shoulders sagged. "Because I knew after that night, it would never happen between us again. I should've told you to cancel your date. I should've told you that night how I felt, but I didn't, and that's on me. It's why I didn't say anything to you about this because saying it aloud isn't going to change anything between us."

"We can't just ignore it!"

"Yes, we can, and we will." Ghost's voice remained steady. She stayed careful not to raise it, aware of Rooster's volatile temper when inflamed and not wanting to fan the flames any further. "I haven't just been avoiding you because of the guilt. I've also been doing it because every time I see you, I think of what I could've had and how I screwed it up by staying quiet like I always do. As happy as I genuinely am for you and Bryn because you two are a perfect match with your values and your personalities and interests, I still find myself wishing it was me instead of her, and I can't get that last night between us out of my head."

Rooster ran a hand through his hair, clenching a fist of it at the end. "So, what exactly are we supposed to do? Pretend like nothing ever happened between us? Pretend there's nothing between us?"

"Yes. I compromised my morals once by sleeping with you before you started dating my best friend, and I can't do it again by dating you if you two break up. I'm sorry, Rooster..."

"This is bullshit." He pushed himself off the counter and stalked off. Ghost followed, their sandwiches long forgotten on the counter. As he reached the front door, he whirled on her, pointing an accusatory finger at her. "I don't get it. You knew I liked you all this time, and you said nothing until I found someone else!"

"You asked me what was wrong, and I told you!" Ghost finally snapped, letting loose a little of her own temper. "This is why I didn't want to tell you in the first place!"

"No, you didn't tell me because you're afraid of commitment ever since Hangman broke your heart after your first breakup. But instead of moving on, you keep returning to him and getting back together."

"Might I remind you I'm the one who broke up with him the second time, and last night was a one-time thing-"

"We were supposed to be a one-time thing, and look what happened there! So sorry if I have a problem believing you and Hangman are done after last night."

"I was upset and drunk, and he was there making me feel like a million bucks while you never took your eyes off of Bryn, so I'm sorry for wanting to be with someone on New Years' Eve that was interested and available."

"Oh, you think it was easy for me to watch Hangman practically eye-fucking you on the dancefloor or seeing you sit in his lap with you two hanging all over each other? Do you think I felt nothing seeing you two stumble out of the bar, knowing full well what would happen?"

"If you liked me so much, then why did you never ask me out?!" Ghost demanded, stepping toward him with a challenging glare in his eye.

"Because you never showed interest!"

"I didn't sleep with you for the hell of it! I slept with you because I liked you!"

"Obviously not enough because you still keep running back to Hangman." Rooster threw open the door, his face red with rage.

"Where are you going?" Ghost asked, her fight evaporating. She wanted to work this out with Rooster, to try and find some peace between them.

"Home. This conversation is finished. I'm not going to be your boy toy. If you want one, go fuck Hangman. I'm done."

His words were a slap in the face to her. After everything she just said, after everything she just confessed to, he thought he was merely a boy toy to her? Voice cracking, Ghost started to say, "Bradley-"

The door slammed shut behind him, leaving Ghost shell-shocked. She had feared Rooster would react negatively toward her if she voiced her troubles, but not like this. Never like this. It's not like she could talk to anyone about what went down just now, either. If Ghost told Bryn, she'd lose another friend because the truth would come out about her relationship with Rooster, and Bryn would undoubtedly accuse Ghost of being another Britney. 

Ghost couldn't go to Hangman. He'd deck Rooster for treating her the way he did because if anyone knew Ghost better than Rooster, it was Hangman, and he knew she wouldn't sleep with anyone for the hell of it.

Ghost couldn't even go to her mom because her mom would've said things she already knew: Ghost shouldn't have lied to Bryn in the first place, she should've told Rooster how she felt in the beginning, and she had to reap what she sowed.

No, Ghost was alone in this. She'd dug this grave for herself and now had to lie in it. The road to hell was paved with good intentions, and Ghost certainly found herself in a hellish place now. 

Bzz! Bzz! The vibrating of her ringtone shocked her back to reality, and she hastily grabbed it, desperately hoping Rooster would be on the other end to apologize but forcing herself to be realistic. Ghost lived in the real world, not in fantasy novels or fanfiction stories. The guy she loved wouldn't come crawling back to apologize.

Her realism stood correct. A familiar but unexpected name flashed on her screen. Frowning, Ghost answered the phone. "Hello, sir."

"Are you crying?" Cyclone inquired, sounding shockingly concerned.

"Uh, no, sir. I had a sneezing attack. What can I help you with?"

"I need you to report to base within the hour. We have a mission for you."

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